#ironically does not contain felix

[theroseempress]

Wrote something for my current WIP and liked it a lot, so here it is! Fair warning, this is in fact quite long. (the only reason I'm not posting this in my website instead is because it's actually a section of another thing I haven't finished writing, and I'm not sure if I want it up there yet)

hey @wackus-bonkus-maximus this has nothing to do with MLB so I dunno if you're interested, but I'm quite pleased with how it came out so if you wanna read this I certainly will not object.

~

The day everything finally fell apart started like any other morning. When thinking back on it, Rani couldn’t help marveling at it. Wake up, eat some of the dreadfully bland bread provided by her landlady, (she had the money to buy better food, in theory at least, but it was free, and if she wasn’t wasting money on how things tasted, there was that much more to send back to her brothers.

And sure, maybe she had eaten less food recently than was entirely healthy, but medical school in a different country was expensive, and so was keeping her other two brothers fed and comfortable. Besides, being small was useful for making unnoticed entrances and exits, so it was fine, really) read the brown envelope that had appeared on her dresser, and leave to find today’s target.

Today’s target was a young man, according to the envelope, he was five foot nine, had strawberry blonde hair, light skin, usually wore a chain earring in his left ear, and was called Bricriu.

(Not much to know about a person, but really, even having the name in there was unusual for a target. The only other information in the envelope was the area he frequented, in the Markets)

Rani both despised and was grateful for the Markets- both because of how crowded and noisy they were- the latter opinion being because it was much easier to tail someone unnoticed when in a crowd, and the former since the same thing made it easier to lose a target.

Either way, Rani’s job wasn’t to gripe, it was to remove her target and then disappear in one way or another, so she shrugged her worn jacket tighter around her shoulders and set off down the street.

It was a cold morning, clouds blanketing the sky as they so often did over the ventral months in Solace. The chainmail Rani wore between her undershirt and thin tunic sucked up the biting air with vigor, the latticed metal icy against her skin even through the layer of cloth. Rani ignored it, instead staring down at her boots (the one piece of clothing she frequently bought new versions of instead of letting them run into the ground) as they carried her across grey cobblestones and around the remaining puddles from last night’s rain. It wasn’t a long walk to the Markets, though as she got closer the amount of mechorses and carriages the young woman had to dodge increased significantly.

Finally reaching one of the unofficial guard posts, Rani halted for a moment to study the seemingly lazy (Rani had to admit, she would have been convinced if she hadn’t seen how fast the guards could move when provoked, there was a reason they were where they were) young man leaning against the wall with his hands tucked into his coat pockets, grey eyes drifting lazily over the people meandering through the bottleneck between two buildings and into a market. Rani, who knew he wouldn’t see her as any threat, but still wasn’t one to take chances, waited until a carriage was blocking his line of sight to her and then slipped into the crowds on the other side of the ‘gate.’

It didn’t take her long to find her target, slipping through the bustling colours and noise of the Market like the shadow she was slowly becoming.

He was stepping out of a building, the sign swinging above his head bearing the same words tucked into Rani’s pocket on a carefully folded piece of paper.

‘The Howling Hound’ proclaimed the sign, creaking back and forth on rusty hooks, and for a moment Rani’s upbringing raised its head and sent a crackle of tension down her spine.

But it was only a moment,and Rani was pushing away her Talin superstitions and darting after the blonde man before she’d even fully processed the words her relatives would have instantly taken as a sign to give up right then and there.

The man strode down the cobbled road like he belonged there, head high and shoulders relaxed, coat unbuttoned despite the wind tugging at his sandy hair, moving with the kind of ease and light Rani had seen on a number of other people (and resented, people like that always got their way, almost as if they really did bring light with them, never trapped in the shadows like her, everyone eager to help them)

Rani slipped after him, ignoring how the wind nipped at her face even through the scarf pulled up around her nose and mouth and silently tailing the tap-tap-tap of his polished boots on the uneven stones below.

Finally, several wind-bitten moments of weaving through the cacophony of noise and colours that was the Markets, Rani’s target turned off into an alley. Rani followed, halting crouched behind a stack of crates and ignoring the frigid slush-water soaking from the cobbles into the right knee of her trousers.

The alley was empty, the only occupants Rani, her target, and a lone dark-feathered bird dozing on a jutting windowsill.

Rani let the cold metal of two of her daggers slip from her sleeves to her palms, slender fingers wrapping around the worn hilts. A pause to steady herself and check they were both hidden from sight, and then she was pouncing forwards with a silence so well-practiced it was almost an afterthought. One, two, three strides across the stones, avoiding a puddle that would have caused a splash, and now she was in range and both hands went up, daggers slicing through the cloudy day.

In the years that followed, Rani went through those moments time and time again, searching for what she’d done wrong, what part of the motion was sloppy, casual, loose.

(did she step too hard, move too slow, did her chainmail rustle, did light glint off the daggers, was she just not good enough)

She still didn’t know.

(she’d moved the same as always, as fast as always, she’d practiced and there was no way her mail would make a noise loud enough to alert him, it was cloudy and there was no light to hit the polished metal and she still wasn’t good enough)

Just before silvered metal met her target’s unprotected throat, the man moved.

He spun, leaning back, bright blue eyes a splash of unexpected colour against the grey skies, grey bricks, grey stones, grey coat, sandy hair dancing just around the edges of his face as if it didn’t dare to get in his way, and then Rani’s daggers were just barely barely one inch too slow touching his throat and grey wasn’t broken by red and-

-And he was smiling, blue eyes now sparkling, and Rani, still caught in the middle of her pounce, realized too late that maybe the kind of light this man carried was instead the kind that tore through shadows like her instead.

He was almost casual, one hand coming up and knocking Rani’s wrists into each-other at just the right angle for a jolt of pain to tear through her numb fingers. The following motion was involuntary, and Rani barely realized she’d let go until her daggers her defense protection safety were on the stones with a sharp ringing and spray of water droplets from the puddle they’d landed in. Rani moved on instinct, still-stinging hands going to the top of her boots and fumbling against icy buckles- damn it why hadn’t she loosened the straps earlier, stupid stupid stupid- for stiff leather, but the man in front of her- not her target now- took the opening before she realized it was there.

Rani’s back slammed up against the alley wall, rough stones digging into her spine and air huffing out of her lungs in a white cloud.

Across the alley, the crow took flight, disappearing with a rustle of feathers and a squawk.

The golden man- Rani’s mind darted back to the paper; Bricriu- didn’t look away from Rani, pale blue eyes studying her face with an almost detached curiosity.

A line of biting cold flared against Rani’s throat, and the realization that Bricriu had a long dagger resting there kicked her awareness into action too late. Both of her wrists were somehow trapped behind her against the wall, Bricriu too close and the blade’s edge too firmly against her skin for her to do anything about it.

A long moment passed, dampness soaking out of the bricks and into Rani’s tunic. Bricriu seemed content to wait, studying her face as if he was watching a particularly spectacular sunrise.

Several more minutes passed, Rani pinned in place both by the dagger at her throat and Bricriu’s piercing gaze, and then her chainmail started to become almost unbearably cold even through her shirt.

Rani shivered, and the motion seemed to break Bricriu out of whatever he’d been thinking about. Smiling, the young man tilted his head.

“Well, I wonder what you’re doing here?”

Rani stayed silent, wrists starting to ache from being pressed into the wall. Bricriu seemed unfazed by her unresponsiveness, continuing to talk as his gaze drifted down her.

“Stabbing people isn’t very polite, you know.” he scolded, almost as if he was talking to a child. “Might get stabbed back as well, I suppose. Lucky for you, I’m curious.”

Pausing, Bricriu leaned over a little and reached into Rani’s pocket, pulling the folded paper out and grinning at her.

“What’s this?”

Rani bit back the urge to lunge at him and tear the paper away. Bricriu seemed to sense her line of thought, cold metal pressing a little harder to her throat. Casually. unfolding the paper despite only having one hand available, Bricriu finally looked away from Rani.

A million thoughts and plans of action rushed through Rani’s head in that moment- he’s distracted rush him move get your daggers attack run away fight hide escape attack- but before she could put any of them into action, the paper was crumpling in Bricriu’s fist and his pale blue gaze was back on Rani.

“An assassin, huh?”

She stayed silent, another wave of shuddering breaking over her as a light drizzle began to soak through her already damp tunic. Bricriu tucked the paper into his coat pocket, eyes staying fixed on Rani’s throughout the motion.

Another long pause followed, Bricriu staring absently at the wall beside Rani’s head, Rani’s shivering escalating to the point that she couldn’t hide it any longer. She’d just determined to try and break away despite the lost feeling in her hands, when Bricriu blinked, straightening.

“Righto, little assassin, you’re coming with me.” he smiled, and maybe this time some of Rani’s shivering wasn’t because of the cold.

~

Fun fact Talin (the nation Rani's from) find dogs unlucky and howling dogs especially unlucky.

Was that sign foreshadowing or not? hmmm

i mean. it is entirely possible that bricriu's gonna give her lots of money and help her with problems!

You never know!

[yumeka-sxf]

Thoughts on Spy x Family: Family Portrait

I finally got around to reading the SxF light novel, Family Portrait...and I mean "finally" because it's literally been sitting in my shelf since it was first released in English back in December of last year! I was distracted by Code White and the SxF video game which came out around the same time, but even long after that, I was having trouble getting motivated to read it. For some reason, experiencing SxF in novel format instead of in anime/manga just didn't appeal to me, plus the fact that it's not written by Endo himself (these weird preferences of mine are also why I'm not into reading fanfics either). Don't get me wrong, in general I love reading stories in prose form too, but for a series like SxF that already has such an established visual identity, it doesn't feel as "authentic" to me if that makes any sense. But I did want to read it eventually, since it is an official part of SxF media and Endo did the illustrations and does acknowledge the book (he wrote a nice afterword at the end). So I finally sat down and read it in sections over the course of this week! I'll share my brief thoughts on each of the contained stories:

Novel Mission 1

Since this was the first story in the book, it took me a while to get used to experiencing the world of SxF in novel form. There were some things I felt would have been better conveyed in anime/manga, for example, one of the very first gags about Yor misinterpreting Anya's nature class as some sort of hardcore outdoor survival trip. As I was reading that part I was like "I get the joke, but it would have been funnier if I actually saw these images and the characters' expressions with Endo's comedic illustrations." It was also a bit jarring to hear the characters thoughts and feelings from third-person narration, but I got used to it. As for the story itself, it was Damianya focused, something I'm not particularly into, but I don't mind it either. I liked the rare, soft Damian moments, and the thing with the squirrel eating Anya's peanut trail was funny. I also liked the scene at the beginning where Loid and Yor feed Bond together while Anya watches.

Novel Mission 2

Oddly, this was my favorite of the stories! Of all the characters, I think the author nailed Yuri's unhinged thoughts the best - as I was reading, I couldn't help but hear every cringe thought in his voice, which is a good sign of how well the author gets the character! I actually chuckled at a few parts too, both from his insane Yor-obsessed and anti-Loid musings, as well as from his banter with Anya. The police interrogation scene was great and would be even better if it ever gets animated! I also found it interesting that this story has the first instance where we find out what Yuri thinks about Bond (that he's fat and useless - rude!) Also his first time hearing about Franky apparently...makes we wonder if Endo will make him feel the same way if these things ever come up in the manga.

Novel Mission 3

I liked this story a lot too! I think it worked the best in novel format out of all of them, probably because it was more focused on drama and emotions than comedy. It's ironic that the two official SxF stories that feature the deeper side of Franky's character - this one and the omake chapter from volume 13 - are both not even part of the main canon! Alessa would have definitely accepted Franky's job as an informant, but he felt that someone like her should only be surrounded by "beautiful things." The poor man really needs to see that inner beauty matters too, and he has that! I also think he should have swallowed his pride and told Loid the real reason why he wanted the disguise...not that it would have changed the outcome. Poor Franky.

Novel Mission 4

This was a cute Forger-focused story, but like the first one, I felt it had parts that would have been more effective in anime/manga form, for example, "hair monster" Yor and whatever hideous painting Felix ended up making! But despite that, it was still funny and cute. Though I do think the author went a tad overboard with Yor's flustered antics...they just kept going and going, lol. Also, like the movie, we have another scenario of Loid getting flung into the air by Yor but landing gracefully on his feet (though this instance was much tamer since she wasn't drunk and only pushed him instead of hit him). Again, maybe I would have appreciated the humor in this story better if I saw it in anime/manga with Endo's hilarious designs and expressions, but for what it was, it was enjoyable enough.

Short Novel

This extra short story would be perfect as a reintroduction story for a future anime season...maybe one day!

-----

Overall, the Family Portrait novel is a nice addition to the Spy x Family universe. Even though I feel the humor in the series is most effective in illustrated form, it's still nice to have more stories in the canon, especially ones that show new sides to the characters, like the Franky and Yuri stories. Like the movie, it's debatable if this novel should be considered true canon or not, but personally, I don't find anything in it that contradicts canon, at least not yet. So yeah, definitely check out the novel if you haven't already! 😁

[melonminnie]

Hello! I'm back, hehehe well I came to ask you something, would you be willing to write for action manhwas? Sorry is that I am addicted to them, blame daddy sung jinwoo.

Leaving the topic, can I have more yandere platonic but this time from Who made me a princess? I have a scenario, maybe the reader was a girl fed up with her life, so you know, she killed herself and ended up opening her eyes in this manhwa and worst of all, she is a rejected daughter of claude.

So in order to survive, she hides from him, contrary to what Atty would do, she decides she doesn't want his attention. She already suffered a lot in her other life from being ignored and crushed by others, as if her feelings were nothing more than garbage and dog poop. That's why this time he doesn't even try, like have you seen the female leads in almost every manhwa quwrer to live and shit? Well, our dear reader DOES NOT WANT TO LIVE, she is tired and fed up with everything.

But imagine if, by chance, an old diary is found in an abandoned library in the ruby palace (forgot to say, but this is 4 years before the initial story, so my reader is 7 at the time) going back to the diary, she He finds it and it turns out that it is magical. So somehow he travels to the past through this book and without thinking he wanders through the old palace finding Claude crying as a child. Because the reader doesn't give a damn about her life, she begins to establish a friendship because if she was already here, why waste this opportunity? he also hates the adult claude ironically he is his dad.

All that shit from his childhood happens and for 4 years the reader goes back and forth from the past to the future, we reach the point where the adult claude remembers that girl a lot and becomes obsessed with finding her since she was his emotional support. Sorry for all that stuff, now imagine that the plot begins and our reader knows it, that's why she decides to run away taking some money (for some reason she became friends with Felix and he gave her 500 gold coins so she can run away) Like reader hates attention, leaves the palace and lives in a cabin, now we move on to claude still having those dreams with that little girl who was becoming a woman, this was always platonic but he is obsessed with finding her, he promised as a child to return all his care and comfort.

She's the only one who knows him best, but we know the reader doesn't care about anyone and just wants to die in a quiet place.

Annnd, you can develop this better, in the end I would like claude to find out that his daughter has always been his best friend in some way and end up locking her up to prevent her from leaving again. I do not know

And I leave you a gift again, hehehe I edited it for a fanfic that I will never finish or publish

(PS: I traced the lineart of the official art, but the coloring is mine and it is based on that scene, this is already old so it has errors)

YAN! CLAUDE X DAUGHTER! READER (platonic)

-Hihi I’m glad you’re back!! Unfortunately I doubt I’ll be writing for adventure manhwa at the moment sense I only read romance at the moment but maybe in the future! Reader has the same appearance as athy, fyi your art always amazes me!! Thank you for requesting mwah 🫶🫶

WARNING EXTREME WARNING CONTAINS SUICIDE DO NOT CONTINUE READING IF THIS MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE this is also extremely confusing I tried making it sound normal 🫶🫶🫶

“Why would she want to die?” Asked one of the dead girls friends, “dunno she had everything yet she became greedy” said the other, standing in front her grave, if the girl was still alive she would’ve choked her, only a pathetic person would be able to make fun of a person in-front their own grave.

Well it’s not like she heard it anyway, and frankly if she did at the moment she wouldn’t care, “I mean she was pathetic with her reincarnation thing and reading fake stuff about it” the friend continued her rant, As she woke up in a non existent body in one of the first novels she’d ever read, but knowing where she was and who’s daughter she was.

To tell the truth, she had reincarnated as the non existent oldest daughter of claude de Alger obelia, the same person who almost drowned his daughter the first he hung around with her, the same person who also killed said daughter in her point of view before she reincarnated, Now she didn’t want the same path, of course she didn’t do the same thing as athanansia did with the rubys, money and gold.

Instead she opted to just hiding away from everyone, it was almost like she was purposely isolating herself, but the maids took it as a joke as she was still a young kid, almost anytime she tired hiding away, one of the maids would find her and then take her back to her room, So she started exploring the entirety of the ruby palace, from up to bottom every bedroom and bathroom.

So of course she soon found the abandoned library, sure it was hard to open the door, but she managed!.

Upon entering said library, it was clear it hadn’t been touched nor used for a very long time, as she took steps her shoes would leave footprints from the dust on the floor, every book she touched had collected dust, While looking around her eyes seemed to wander to a nearly unheard of twinkling sound coming, it sounded sweet almost as if it was luring her in, she searched everywhere to find the source of the sound, which she did!.

It was a old diary frankly she didn’t know it was one till she opened it and read the contents of it, it didnt have a label only twinkling stars surrounding it, of course as a curious 7 year old who can read, she decided to read it.

At first it was boring, the handwriting was messy, as if a child was writing it, it started as writing about what they did throughout the day, it was clear that this diary belonged to someone who had a high noble status.

Soon the soft twinkling noises became cackling noises, it was extremely loud to her ears,but she nonetheless continued, flipping it till she reached a point where the cackling noises sounded so loud that it resembled gun noises, she slowly covered her ears and tried running away from the book.

But she couldn’t, why?, the dust had become fog, just slightly more browner, so with her still covering her ears, coughing sounds erupted from her throat, her eyes becoming watery so she had to close them, she kneeled to the floor continuously coughing as the dust began entering her nose.

Her hands quickly moved from her ears, to her mouth and nose, once everything had settled, and the blonde could finally breathe properly, she slowly opened her eyes, they were met with greenery instead of a dusty library, now this was confusing, as she knew she didn’t walk out of the library.

Because of course she couldn’t, and to her knowledge she didn’t inherit any magical powers, of course it no longer looked like she was in ruby palace, this place was way to extravagant to ruby palace!.

Now she couldn’t go back unless she finds out a way, so she decided to wander around for a bit!.

The blonde haired girl was getting tired, usually she would walk longer, but her legs were giving out, she of course was scared of getting noticed by who ever owns or works here, she’d already worked so hard to not die nor meet any important character, why does she need to die now after being alive for 7 years?.

So she opted to sitting behind a tree hiding her body from everyone, “I’ll just sit here till I gain my strength back!” She thought, she’d lived quietly her entire life, of course this would’ve been easy.

If she wasn’t a noisy person, not even a minute had passed before she started hearing hiccuping noises, it sounded like a boy was crying, whether she wanted to know who was crying or didn’t, it see,ed like her body was punishing her as it started moving by itself to the crying sounds.

There was a boy who was older then her maybe 10?, his appearance matched Claude’s appearance exactly!, but then there was his brother, who looked the same, the girl was standing behind him obviously just starring at him, of course he felt a sudden stare on him, so to his surprise he finds a tiny girl with blue eyes gawking at him.

“What are you staring at?!” He asked slightly embarrassed that someone had caught him crying his eyes out, “Well obviously you your the only person here!” She answered back deciding to sit next to him, “So what where you crying about also what’s your name!” She asked not really caring about what he was crying about, wanting to find out his name only.

“Claude” he mumbled turning his head the other way to whip his tears away, “O-oh” frantically she was quite disappointed, but if this was her hill to die on so be it!, she died once she wouldn’t be scared of facing death again right?, “Well?, aren’t you going to tell me your name” he demanded, “Name..” she answered.

“Then claude, do you want to be my friend?” She extended her hand to his smiling, “W-what do you know who you want to be friends with?” He asked, “yes I do know so do you or do you not?” She asked again, clearly nervous of getting rejected again by the same man who rejected her as a grown adult, being friends with your dad isn’t the best especially when you’ve never personally known him.

“Fine!” He accepted the seven year olds request shaking her hand in confirmation.

“Great” she whispered smiling happily.

“Great..” he said glancing at her hand then eyes.

Of course she found out that by simply it turning night she would return to her original world, the world where the only people who knew of her existence were the maids and lowly knights assigned to the ruby palace, It was good opportunity for the girl cause returning from both worlds affects the timeline greatly, when she’d go to child claude and return at night, It would also become night.

Which meant the maids could leave her alone for days at times, so that’s how the cycle continued, of course every time she returned claude would age up continuously he’d age up a lot in the four years she’d been with him.

In those four years, claude had told her about every aspect of his life, the way his step mother treated him, his brother, family issues, favorite food, Felix, claude slowly realized he’d grown a fond of his friend, he felt like she was a mini version of him, he didn’t notice the way she still looked younger while he looked older, he’d never notice that.

At some point the blonde haired girl knew she needed to stop being around him, it was so that so she doesn’t affect the story line, she’d never want that of course, and so when y/n turned 11, she’d known she’d need to stop, as the storyline was so close to happening, she slowly forced herself to forget she’d ever meet her father as a kid, she knew she needed to stop when he mentioned that his newborn daughter looked like a split image of her.

Now claude would never forget about the friend he made in the garden, how could he?, the way he met her to him was fascinating, he was determined to find her, As the now older man ran a hand threw his hair, he didn’t remember much of you, he remembered how you looked like, he’d know you if he spotted you anywhere, but he just can’t seem to find you anywhere?.

Were you a fairy or an angel?, or were you the ghost of his daughter from another life haunting him as a child.

“Felix!!” The young girl yelled running up to the red haired man, “y/n how are you?” He asked bowing to her, Felix never met you as a child he’d found you behind a tree asleep and took you back when you were eight, ever since he’d been giving you gold to help you escape, as he knew you’d never want to meet your oh so scary dad that you accidentally met when he was a kid.

He just presumed you’d heard rumors about how he killed his own lover afterbirth alongside all his concubines in the palace you’d been at your entire life.

“This time” she breathed heavily as she’d been running, “give me 500 gold please” the blonde begged clasping her hands together mustering the cutest face she could pull off, the red head chuckled softly before handing you 300, “hey! I said 500 not 300”

“Y/n come on what do you need 500 for?”

“Why are you asking please just give it promise you won’t ever see me again” she pleaded with him, “fine don’t let anyone find out though” , he sighed before handing an extra 200.

“Of course I won’t!” The girl replied before running away waving him off with a smile.

“His majesty must never find out..” he mutter returning back to his duties or precisely to Claude’s office.

Y/n kept her promise, she had snuck out in the middle of the night leaving almost everything behind except things she held dearly, and had bought a cabin far away from the capital.

As the years passed by y/n turned 22, it had been a long time sense she’d seen Claude, she’d heard of him of course and her sister athanasia, sense the two had a huge age gap, her younger sister had turned 15 recently, she’d wished she could’ve celebrated with her but she knew if she ever went back there something she’d never want to happen will happen.

Claude had frequent dreams of his childhood friend turning older, claude was forgetting her appearance, it was irritating to him, So the man knew that she wasn’t hiding in the capital she was on the outskirts of it.

He’d heard her say she’d hope to get a cabin on the outskirts of the capital in one of his dreams, Felix knew what was happening to claude wasn’t great he’d tried to stop him multiple times, “are you telling me what I can and can’t do?” Claude asked Felix as the redhead had held his body forbidding him from escaping.

“Your majesty your losing your mind over a nonexistent person” Felix yelled at him, “nonexistent? Felix do you know what the fuck your telling me right now?” The man replied, he cursed him out to no end that night, Felix was getting tired of it, the emperor was going insane over his daughter whom he hadn’t talked nor seen for 22 years, yet now he wanted to talk to her?.

Felix knew where you lived as you made the purchase with his money and he got mail saying he bought a cabin, he threw it out not caring what you did with the money.

Claude was smiling manically the day he knew where you lived, “your highness are you sick?” Felix asked, “No why would you ask that” he replied leaning his head on his hand starring at the paperwork.

Of course, claude knew who you were now, that you were his daughter, that you were the same person who he had met as a desperate kid with no friends.

Claude’s obsession was growing out of proportion, when claude found out where his precious daughter was, he stormed over there an hour later, Felix tried everything possible in his ability to stop him.But he couldn’t.

In those years that you had lived in the cabin your only thought, that was to die, but you couldn’t. You lived in a cabin for no reason, the purpose you couldn’t complete anymore.

While you were asleep, you heard a huge bang at you door, quickly getting up, she opened the door, revealing a tall male with blonde hair and diamond like blue eyes.

Claude starred at his daughter, daggers almost, “I’ve finally found you y/n” he smiled, it was terrifying, how did he find you?, how did he even know who you are, this was absolute hell, the girl tried shutting the door but his grip was stronger then hers, “you can’t run away from now” he said “my daughter” he pushed. The door open and pulled her into a one sided hug.

It was terrifying being held by the same man whom you have been trying to avoid for the past 22 years of your life, he found you like it was nothing, the way he was hugging you was almost bone crushing.

He swiftly knocked you out, knowing the moment he left go of you you’d try to escape.

And he’d never ever let you leave his side ever again, you’ll be forced with the title of the princess whether you like it or not.

Befriending claude de Alger obelia was the worst mistake you’d ever made.

On a side note my request are always open! I don’t bite 🫶

[noboundsforlove]

Violet Sorrengail’s Second Signet

Her second signet is light. Let me explain.

Let’s start with her first signet, back in Fourth Wing. In Chapter 22, Tairn channels to Violet for the first time. Violet describes it as a “rush of energy” that races down her spine. Then she says “Another wave ripples through me…” and continues “Something within me expands, somehow too big for my own body, too vast to be contained, and pain sears every nerve as I crack open, the sound reverberating through my skull like bones shattering. It’s as though I’ve been split at the very seams of the fabric of my being.” What’s important to note is that it comes in waves and it is painful. She then says “Energy pours in - a deluge of raw endless power…” She specifically describes it as “the energy - the power.” As continuing to course through her veins.

Fast forward to Iron Flame. Andarna wakes up from the Dreamless Sleep at the end of Chapter 37. I’m of the opinion that Violet’s second signet does not manifest until after Andarna awakes (sorry to anyone who thinks the hallucination of Liam [Ch. 35] or Rhiannon’s dagger move [Ch. 29] are a part of the second signet). Andarna is still a bit groggy when she wakes up, so she doesn’t start channeling to Violet right away. She starts channeling in Chapter 48 - you know - the “My house. My Chair. My woman.” chapter.

During this cataclysmic scene, Xaden gives Violet the conduit to hold - this is key, as I think it’s why Violet does not fully realize Andarna has started to channel. I think it starts when Violet says “With the next caress, pleasure and power crest through me, over me, in simultaneous waves that crash again and again. There’s no thunder, no strike, only the hum of energy in my hand that flares with the strokes of Xaden’s mouth and fingers.” Violet’s stream of consciousness continues that it does not end - “only the waves of infinite ecstasy that come without breaking.” She says out loud “I can’t take it” and says the waves come and come with no end in sight. She describes the “searing pleasure” that rips through her. After Xaden floods the bond, she says “I shatter, splintering into a million glittering shards of bliss as I scream out his name. Power and light course through me without burning…” and then says she feels her power crackle through the orb in her hand before settling.

The way Violet describes what she is feeling as endless waves and searing pleasure echoes the scene in Fourth Wing where Tairn starts channeling to her. It is the only spot in the book where she says that “power and light” course through her, and I think that indicates that her second signet is finally present. It’s important to note that in Chapter 40, Felix tells Violet that she “wields pure power that takes the form of lightning” because that is the form Violet is most comfortable shaping it as. I think her light signet will be similar—what she will wield is pure light, but it will take a certain form.

As Andarna reminds Violet in Chapter 53, “signets manifest according to the person wielding.” Violet is, in a metaphorical sense, light. I think her signet of power is associated with her rider heart, and her signet of light is associated with her scribe mind. Violet is outraged by being kept in the dark by her government—she wants the truth to be brought to light. This also applies to her relationship with Xaden—she constantly seeks truth, or light.

Violet is also going to need light to defeat the venin. In Chapter 53, Cat makes a comment to Violet that the fact that she doesn’t carry a torch with her says that Violet hasn’t been appropriately scared of the dark yet. At the beginning of Chapter 61, we get more context as to why Cat might be afraid of the dark—the chapter begins with a quote from Major Edvard Tiller’s Unaccredited Study of the Venin. “Though there is some debate, it is greatly believed that turning venin heightens one of the dark wielder’s senses. It is this scholar’s belief that the one responsible for the death of King Grethwild developed keener eyesight. For not even the best of His Majesty’s royal fliers could see through the darkness the venin hid within to slay our beloved king.” Violet will need light to expose the venin and then wield power in the form of lightning to defeat them.

One thought on the form the light signet could take is that Violet is a luminary. She can amplify dragon fire, and make it hotter. She might need this to be able to forge a tool or weapon out of iron, like the wardstones, the stones found in the wyvern carcasses, the Rybestad chest, or the runed stones that protected the children of the rebellion. After all, Violet is a part of the Iron Squad, and the book is called Iron Flame - perhaps the answer has been sitting in front of us all along. Violet’s second signet may just be her ability to wield iron flame.

[xxstraykidsaikoxx]

STRAY KIDS

• 𝕄𝕒𝕜𝕟𝕒𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕖

➷ HAN (HannieKo)

• Comedian Duo

• Simps (minhoandhyunjin)

• Her contact name: Simp #1

• His contact name: Simp #2

Han is always there to make Ai laugh whenever she needs comfort but doesn't wanna admit it. The two are always making jokes and laughing with each other. They are also major simps for their respective partners, those being Minho and Hyunjin. They don't have many interactions but when they do it's always hilarious.

ICONIC MOMENTS:

During the recent fanmeeting, when Hyun and Minho did the "Troublemaker" dance cover, Han and Ai can be seen hitting each other trying to contain themselves while also losing it like middle school girls. When it was over they said "It should've been me"

During the camping episode of SKZ CODE, when Han made shrimp for the group and asked someone to try it, no one payed him any mind. Ai noticed this and said she'd try it, to which he reminded her that she didn't like shrimp, to which she replied, "But you made it" which made him very happy

➷ FELIX (AiLix)

• Platonic Soul Mates

• GalaxyRacha

• Her contact name: Moony🌙

• His contact name: Sunshine☀

Lix was her first bestie when she got accepted into SKZ. His elimination was the first time Ai cried on camera, and which STAYs like to reference whenever Ai comforts Lix to this day. Both very touchy people and are hugging eachother constantly, which sparked the rumor that the two were dating, but Aiko quickly debunked it. They sometimes game together, althought Ai perfers more quiet and calm games, they always have fun together.

ICONIC MOMENTS:

The name "GalaxyRacha" comes from a SKZ CODE episode where they were paired up together and had to pick a team name. Ai suggested team "MoonSun" since Lix is often referenced to the sun, and Ai is to the moon. The name stuck and during a live with the two and Hyunjin, Hyun asked what he would be, and Ai said the stars, which made them all happy, and thus 'GalaxyRacha' was born, consisting of Felly, Hyun and Ai.

During a concert on the MANIAC tour, it had started to rain a little heavy and instead of canceling the concert, Ai and Lix went out and performed "Rain on me" by Lady Gaga and pretty much played in the rain. Lix later messaged on Bubble that they had gotten a little sick but it was worth it.

Their iconic TikTok cover to "Moonlight Sunrise" by TWICE was liked by all since it was considered ironic

➷ SEUNGMIN (MinniKo)

• Loves Teasing The Old Man™ duo

• Savage Duo

• Her contact name: kuromi wannabe

• His contact name: Minnie🐶

Another pair that doesn't have a lot of interactions, but when they do its golden. As previously mentioned, they both love teasing Channie about his age, which have surfaced some amazing clips and moments. Although they aren't as close, Minnie always notices when Ai is upset and does his best to offer his presence as comfort.

ICONIC MOMENTS:

During a concert during the MANIAC tour, Ai and Seungmin were 'arguing' about which accent is better, since Ai and Seungmin share the same american accent, and the Aussie boys have their accent. Ai and Seugmin are one of the main english teachers in the group, and have a bet with Channie and Lix to see if the other members get the American or Aussie accent.

When Seungmin was upset at something, Ai noticed and went to hug him, and he immediately melted and couldn't stay mad for long with the maknae hugging him.

➷ I.N (Ainnie)

• Platonic soulmates

• Maknae's on top

• Her contact name: Aiki🐾

• His contact name: Fox boy🦊

From the moment they met they were attached at the hip. Ai liked having someone so close in age to her and she often referred to him as her saving grace. Being the maknae's of the group, they have a lot of the same interests and mannerisms such as always getting what they want and being complete menaces together. Similar to Minho, Ai refers Jeongin as the brother she never had.

ICONIC MOMENTS:

During "Two Kids One Room", Aiko was talking about how Jeongin felt more like a brother than her actual brother, since he's been there for her more than anyone else in her family has.

During the camping episode of SKZ code, when Jeongin layed down to nap, Ai layed down next to him and rested her head on his back

ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

[rinkkuma]

💭 about rinkkuma + rules !

yay: fruit, animanga, k-pop, roblox, acnh/acnl, video games, joao felix, marc guiu, hector fort, jude bellingham, chelsea fc, real madrid cf, fc barcelona, sanrio, makeup, boba, cats, alone time, rain.

nay: school, spiders, hot weather, reading, (i know, ironic) pickles.

animanga favorites!

sae, isagi, nagi. (bllk) ✦ shoyo, atsumu, suna. (hq) ✦ satoru, yuta, yuuji. (jjk) aki, power, denji. (csm) ✦ eren, mikasa, levi. (aot) ✦ chifuyu, ran, mitsuya. (tr) + more!

k-pop stan list + biases!

twice. (sana) : lesserafim. (yunjin) : newjeans. (minji) : aespa. (ningning) : ive. (wonyoung/rei) : iz*one. (nako) + all other post-iz*one solo girlies : loona. (hyeju/yves) : nmixx. (sullyoon/haewon) : kiss of life. (natty) : stayc. (sieun) : kep1er. (xiaoting) : itzy. (chaeryeong) g-idle. (shuhua)

i only write sfw works, mostly fluff!

basic dni criteria.

i currently do not have a posting schedule due to school, (and it is my very busy junior year) but i will try to post as much as possible.

requests and prompt ideas are welcome and highly appreciated, but it is not a guarantee i will write it. whether i'm not sure how to write it or not comfortable with it, but still feel free to send them! ^_^

this blog does contain spoilers, but i do put warnings for major ones. (ex: #jjkspoilers)

translating my works is ok, but please ask and credit me! please do not directly repost though.

please do not copy word for word. using similar prompts, etc. is ok!

currently writing for: blue lock, haikyuu, & jjk.

don't be afraid to send in asks/talk to me!

WIPS for those who read this ! (not in order)

afterschool with them (jjk)

where they like to kiss you (jjk)

jjk boys as bfs pt. 2 (megumi, choso, toge)

[scottwbeattie]

Review: Iron Man Epic Collection 14: Return of the Ghost

Tony Gets His Groove Back

Tony Stark has never been cooler than he was during Bob Layton and David Michelinie’s first run on Iron Man. Denny O’Neil then used the alcoholism that they introduced (and had Tony quickly overcome) to take the character to rock bottom before building him back up again. When Layton and Michelinie returned to the title, it didn’t make sense to undo O’Neil’s excellent run by immediately returning to the 1978-1982 status quo, so they instead spent 2 years having Tony rebuilding his company and reintegrating some of the supporting cast who O’Neil had written out of the book. Sobriety had also given the character righteous fury, and he went after both friends and enemies who were using his technology. Having accomplished his mission, Tony was now able to settle in and return to something like his old self.

Iron Man 14 begins with the original graphic novel, Crash. I already reviewed it in a separate post, but to recap: it’s terrible and can be skipped. However, once you get into the meat of the Epic with the regular issues, Return of the Ghost quickly becomes a top-tier Iron Man Epic.

The issues themselves are mostly one- or two- issue self-contained arcs. Other than Tony’s complicated romantic life (he may or may not be simultaneously sleeping with 3 different women, all of whom seem to know about the others), there aren’t any running subplots. There’s a breezy tone to them, as Tony switches from yacht dates to corporate meetings to battles with some classic foes like the Mandarin, the Grey Gargoyle, Blizzard, Whiplash, and the titular Ghost.

Layton and Michelinie also devote a lot of screen time to Tony’s large supporting cast. One of my favorite parts of their runs is that Stark Enterprises feels like a real company rather than just a plot device to explain why Tony has enough money to build his Iron Man suits. Mrs. Arbogast, Felix Alverez, Marcy Pearson, Ant-Man Scott Lang, Clay Wilson, and, of course, Rhodey are all individuals with distinct personalities, and they help flesh out Stark Enterprises by representing different viewpoints and goals for the company.

The art looks great for most of these issues as well. Jackson Guice provides most of the layouts, but even when he’s away, Bob Layton almost always does the finishes, which gives the book a consistent look. There’s only one issue that is finished by Barry Windsor-Smith (a fantastic penciler in his own right), and it doesn’t look nearly as good.

The collection finishes with three issues of Marvel Fanfare starring Iron Man. They’re just okay (especially in comparison with Crash) but also feel very inconsequential. Granted, this is par for Iron Man Epic Collections, and I always say that suffering through filler is our lot in life.

Return of the Ghost is an odd collection. On the one hand, these issues are about as good as the title has ever been, and I’d highly encourage anyone who likes Iron Man to check them out. That said, it also feels odd recommending an Epic where more than a quarter is, to be honest, not very good filler. At the end of the day, I do think that the regular series issues are more than strong enough to justify this Epic, but I also wish that Marvel would take it easy on Shellhead fans for a change.

[homeformyheart]

As I said, 12 - "don't put me in this position" from that one angst prompt list i pointed you in dms, with whoever 👀👀👀

thank you @mepheesto for the request! this mayyyy still be too angsty for most peoples’ tastes (no happy ending). sorry in advance!

author’s note: i thought M would be a better fit for this scenario than N; i know i’m leaving a lot to the imagination but i wanted to keep these prompt fills relatively short. this takes place during the deep romance part of their relationship. hope you all enjoy! copyright: all characters, except the oc detective, are owned by mishka jenkins @seraphinitegames. series/pairing: the wayhaven chronicles – mason x f!detective (ria knight) rating/warnings: 14+; major character death, angst based on/prompt: OTP angst prompts // 12. “Don’t put me in this position.” (in bold) word count: 1.3k summary: ria makes mason promise the unthinkable.

mason stood in front of the wrought-iron gates of the wayhaven cemetery, his thick boot-clad feet sinking in the mud as the remains of the summer storm danced on his freckled skin.

it wasn’t supposed to end this way.

she was supposed to be here, by his side.

not buried six feet below a mound of dirt.

she promised to come back to him.

not go somewhere he couldn’t follow.

she was supposed to live.

not die by his hand in his arms.

3 weeks earlier

ria reached for mason’s hand as she sat on a gurney in the small, sterile room with nothing but white walls and a small, beeping monitor on a side table.

“you nervous?” he asked, holding her hand tightly in his.

his grey eyes softened as he studied her, trying to memorize the exact blue of her eyes and the way her pale skin radiated warmth that seeped through his clothes.

the corner of her eyes seemed to lift in an attempt to put him at ease. she should be terrified, but for some reason, she was trying to reassure him. the thought made him frown.

“hey, i need you to promise me something,” she said quietly, wrapping her other hand around their intertwined ones.

“anything,” he murmured, leaning in to give her a soft kiss on the forehead.

“if something were to go wrong—”

“it won’t.”

he needed her to focus all her energy on surviving.

she tugged his hand toward her. “i know the risks and there is a chance. if something does go wrong and i am no longer in control of myself…if i go feral, i need to know that you’ll handle it.”

he just stared at her in disbelief. “that won’t happen.”

“mason. if i am not myself and am capable of hurting people, i need you to make the call, you understand? for the good of everyone. i wouldn’t trust anyone else to do it.”

the pale blue of her eyes reminded him of the way seeing a sliver of blue on an overcast winter sky sometimes made the cold feel worse. the way the light reflected in them, waking his senses softly most mornings, now pierced his vision until the image of her blurred.

the frown on his face deepened and he pulled his hand away, tucking it into his pocket and reaching for a cigarette. “don’t put me in this position.”

“mason, i’m so sorry,” she said quietly, putting a palm to his cheek and turning his head toward her. “i hope you know how much i love you.”

he put the cigarette in his mouth and bit down hard, crushing the paper between his teeth until it disintegrated. the broken remains fell to the floor, the dark brown filling contrasting with the white tiled floor. the entire room was blinding and blurring.

“ria, i—”

a knock on the door, followed by agent chana peeking out from adam’s large stature drew their attention away from each other.

“ready? the agent who will perform the turning will be here shortly. you all can wait outside,” chana said sharply.

ria met adam’s piercing gaze, holding it for a full two seconds before he gave her a small nod. mason glanced back and forth between the two before adam left the room, the frown on his face deepening.

she slowly intertwined her fingers with his again and kissed the back of his hand.

“i won’t hurt you,” he said quickly, tightening his grip on her hand.

“i need you to keep me from hurting the ones i love. and i am sorry that by doing this, i am hurting you.”

he paused and looked at her for what would be the last time while she was human. how could she ever understand how losing her might destroy him?

his strength, stamina, and keen senses were of no use to him now. none of it would help keep her with him.

“come back to me. that’s an order,” he murmured, capturing her lips with his.

he focused on the feel of her lips, the taste of her contented sighs, and the warmth spreading throughout his body, memorizing every fiber that she seemed to touch before pulling back. he watched as the color of her eyes seemed to tremble before realizing that he was actually seeing the reflection of his own tormented grey ones.

“i don’t answer to you, sunshine,” she retorted cheekily.

mason ran his thumb over her cheek, feeling something unfamiliar lodge itself in the back of his throat. “please,” he whispered, his voice strangled and hoarse.

her eyes widened slightly. the word was as unfamiliar for her to hear as it was for him to say.

“i’ll try,” she said, squeezing his hand one more time before nudging him toward the door.

mason reluctantly left, looking over his shoulder back at her as agent chana began securing her to the bed, the gnawing pit in his stomach growing as he took in a rare expression of concern on adam’s face.

“what did she ask you to do?”

adam gave him a long, stoic glance before reaching into his pocket. mason already knew that it was a vial of dmb before adam had even removed it from his pants. he stared at the glass container, the color of the liquid inside confirming its purity and potency before meeting adam’s gaze again.

the feeling of dread in his stomach seemed to match the fear reflected in adam’s face. mason turned back to face the window to the room, hoping for once in his life that his instincts were wrong.

as promised, nate and felix kept rebecca as far away from the room and the process. they all knew things could go south and rebecca was better off only knowing the final result once it was all over.

despite her willingness and determination to turn, it seemed that ria had expected the worst to come true. it bothered him more than he wanted to admit that she hadn’t confided in him, even if it was because she knew he’d want her to call off the whole thing.

and as promised, adam and chana did their best to control the situation. the agency tried every known tactic to temper and lock away her feral side after she was turned. but the way she was turned, probably because of her mutated blood, was unlike anything the agency had ever seen before.

she was too strong, and it was all too much.

he watched as the woman he loved faded away a little more each day. every physical and psychic attempt to subdue her seemed to tear him apart inside tenfold.

after a week, he knew the blue-eyed person scratching and snarling at everything in sight was no longer the person he had hoped to spend eternity with.

so when the time came and the forms were handed to him, mason didn’t hesitate.

he signed the order and held on to her as tightly as he could during the procedure, despite her thrashing against him and the restraints. he held her for as long as he could even after her body stilled and her breathing had stopped.

he held on to her even when rebecca stormed in and cradled her child’s head in her hands, weeping hysterically for hours. his grip tightened even as adam and nate repeatedly murmured that he needed to let her go.

he knew they were right, at least, in that particular moment. funeral arrangements would have to be made and her body would need to be prepared. so, he let them take her body.

but he knew he’d spend the rest of his immortal life holding on to her.

from these OTP angst prompts (always accepting)

* * * * * taglist:  @kelseaaa; @kat-tia801; @anotherbeingsworld; @crackerdumortain; @pearlsandsteel; @gloynporslen; @sosolenoo; @alyssalauren; @wayhavenots; @gingerbreton; @takemyopenheart; @writer-ish; @fhauvilles;

[heresyourramen]

Seo Changbin - Green Eyed Monster

Halloween was ages ago but I still wanted to post this one. 

Changbin x female reader insert (Heavily tattooed y/n, she’s strong too since her job is a personnel trainer, idk whatever)

5.9 K Words

It does contain SMUT/EXPLICT CONTENT

Warnings: A horror house, a lot of angst, pretty vanilla sex some light oral, jealousy, some fluff. 

"Its charming!" your voice echoed through the cold night air. 

The old mansion or at least what was left of it was probably anything but, though like anything if you looked hard enough you'd find the quirks. the gothic architecture had fallen apart, the steel spires and some old grey, rotten wood all that remained its steel spires and a  very creaky weather vane  that's rooster shape became somewhat ominous in the darkness of the night, well that and the sounds of people screaming inside every now and again probably also didn't help. 

"It's probably haunted and we're all going to die," Changbin's monotonous voice  came from beside you and you saw Felix clutch onto your boyfriends arm tighter and you half wished your love for all things spooky had remained a secret so that you could be the whiny baby  but alas, Changbin had met  you on a day you were wearing your favourite oversized Freddie Kruger t-shirt and therefor that was an impossible feat from the start. Han was clinging to your puffer jacket sleeve,  Minho stood beside you his face impassive  as he also stared ahead, out of the corner of your eye you saw Hyunjin sneak up on him from behind, he breathed down the back of Minhos neck, you've never seen someone go so pale so quickly but as soon as Minho turned around Hyunjins own fear was prevelant on his face as he flinched away from Minho who nearly put him in a choke hold.

 You let out a small sigh, when you thought touring the haunted house would be a  fun little activity for pre-Halloween festivities but when the boys thought they'd be able to manage wandering with you they'd obviously forgotten the last time they let you pick the movie for the designated movie night.  Your hope of cuddling with Changbin had been thrown out the window at the first jump scare, Felix claiming a spot on his lap instead and Han clinging onto you like a koala, his flailing had caused you to miss half of the movie itself. Chan had sat quietly enduring the movie his hand sneaking to hold Jeongins hand in his own for comfort, Hyunjin and Minho had clung onto each other  desperately and Jeongin had watched with the same level of interest as you and Changbin.  Chan was stuck recording  with Seungmin and Jeongin on a new vocal unit  track, keeping them away from tonight's little adventure and leaving and your boyfriend as the only two who might actually enjoy this horror show.

"Thanks sunshine." You rolled your eyes, you loved him but sometimes he was insufferable. You stepped forward walking through the crooked iron gate along the path lined with different carved pumpkin lanterns, Han either to scared to let go or too busy looking around for the  monsters his imagination was conjuring followed after you. You were a few steps in and the other shuffled through as well, following in your wake. 

The massive door lay  turned in against the wall and if it wasn't  for the small lights decorating the tickets table it would've looked like a big mouth of darkness waiting to swallow you whole and the entryway was deserted only some graffiti and stupid kids names carved into the ancient walls. You felt Han shiver most probably because of the breeze but you took his hand and gave it a gentle and what you hoped was a centring squeeze, not wanting the activity to induce a panic attack for him although that might be impossible because of what could be waiting around every corner. When you looked back  to check that no one had tripped over some old sticks and trash  that was blown onto the porch, your eyes immediately met Changbins his face was as impassive as ever but his brow had a small furrow to them as it moved from your face to your hands now hidden by Jisungs sweater paw and you turned your head back not really feeling guilty about it. 

Changbin was a naturally cuddly person with his members but for some reason he had kept PDA and clinginess with you to a minimum , rarely even holding your hand and only ever giving you a hug as a greeting in front of his members. Of course as the relationship progressed the boys saw you often enough to be comfortable with you as well, they'd be affectionate in a friendly way but often the affection you received from the younger boys felt more than that, that Changbin would show you. 

In private it was like his hands were glued to your body, always touching you in some way, hand resting on your thigh if he was busy otherwise he'd be cuddling you and peppering you with kisses 90 percent of the time. It hurt you that he didn't want to do the same for you in person but you'd left it alone knowing he would have good reason but it also meant in your perspective he had to accept that  being affectionate was part of your nature, and babying the boys was part of your natural trait as 'the mom' friend.  Han squeezed your hand as you passed under a not so stable looking archway and into a room with an old fire place following the neon arrows taped to the floor. Suddenly Minho- and Hyunjin's petrified screeches came from behind you and you saw a white hand come from underneath a table clutching onto Hyunjins ankle Minho screeching because Hyunjin nearly tackled him to the ground in his dramatics.  Hans other arm wrapped around the one holding his hand as he suctioned himself onto you, Felix also practically now being carried by Changbin. 

When you turned to lead the way into the new room a clown towered over all of you in the middle of the entryway, its plastic hatchet raised and a terrible grin with sharp teeth painted on the mask, your eyes widened and you couldn't help but giggle this however was inaudible thanks to the howls the boys sent up at the sudden shock. You lead Han around the clown, the actor in the suit only allowed to turn as he follows you with his scary smile as you walked passed. 

This was how the rest of the evening continued a jump scare coaxing wails and terrified screams from everybody but you who simple giggled at the outrageous costumes and Changbin who's expression remained mostly passive. When you exited the massive doors Felix and Han was practically dragging you and your boyfriend out and into the cold night air again.  When you all piled into your car Han having called shotgun the boys immediately started rambling loudly over the pop hits that played on the radio. When they mentioned they should do it every year you rolled your eyes at the outrageous suggestion. 

"Hey Noona, why do you like scary stuff so much." Han inquired eyes wide as everyone's attention shifted towards yourself and everyone else in the car went quite as you scanned the street to park so you could get ice cream, you sighed and parked at the end of the street.

"Because it's fun." the truth is that it had become a comfort much like getting piercings or tattoo's had, the pain, the adrenaline rush, they all clouded your brain in a new way that your sadness didn't and since then each of those items had become associated with feeling better, and even though your mental state had changed since a few years back it didn't change the fact that it was important to you. Changbin new this was the real reason, dammit it was one of the first conversations you had when you started dating and that's when he noticed you awkwardly shifting around the smiley with your tongue as you smiled uncomfortably he announced that he really wanted ice cream and diverted the attention away from you successfully. You got out and made sure the car was locked as you started walking until suddenly you felt someone jump on you, you heard Felix giggle and you grinned hooking your arms under his thighs as you carried him on your back an easy feat thanks to the hard work you put in the gym on the daily the few meters to the front of the late night ice cream shops entrance, conveniently located on the same block as their apartment. You've spent many nights here, post date night, post gym, heck even post sex but it didn't matter because it was Changbin who had made this place one of those things that help you feel better, but it was probably because he made you feel better.  Felix hopped off and you looked over to your boyfriend eyeing the two of you with that same look he had given Han clinging to your side, before directing everyone to the counter. 

You all sat happily eating the ice cream, laughing at the boys making fun of each others expressions when they got scared. You giggled along with them your legs resting on Han's lap who had claimed the seat beside you in the booth before any one could give it a second thought, you licked at your own ice cream the metal of your tongue ring against the creaminess a sensation you'd never get used to yourself.  At first you were confused when Changbin had approached in the gym at what seemed to be the end of a session with Chan, your friends who had used to train with you telling you that you often looked more than intimidating when doing your workouts, which you understood, you were the definition of the modern post break up stereotype, hair dyed nearly white except for your dark roots, tatted from your neck to your fingertips, pierced and hitting the gym nearly two hours a day with thigs big enough to crush skulls in between them, except your last break up had been two years ago and you hadn't felt the need to date again. Well, until Changbin who had nervously shifted himself from side to side and asked you to go for coffee with him, you had barely answered your eyes scanning at the veins that lined his big arms, looking bigger thanks to the pump from working out. You swore some drool had escaped your mouth as you ogled him and quickly said yes, truth be you had admired him plenty of times from across the weight section, I mean who didn't, he was beautiful. Point is you were beyond out of place with the sunshinyness of the boys, only ever somewhat looking like you could maybe fit in when you stood next to Bang Chan and Changbin with their monotonous outfits of black. But they had all warmly accepted you, with zero reservations,  as if the piercings and tattoos barely even existed, something you appreciated in a culture it was so seriously frowned, them treating you not like an outsider meant the world to you. 

But you thanked whatever deity existed everyday for all of them, no matter what, because for now you could say you wouldn't be getting new piercings or tattoo's soon at least not for the reasons you were used to getting them. When you were done, saying good bye to each of the boys, with soft pecks on the forehead from Felix and Jisung and a timid wave directed at them as they walked away, you released a deep breath the air foggy as it left your nose. 

Changbin taking your hand, hooking his pinky with yours as he walked with you back towards the car, it wasn't unusual for him to go home with you after a day out. When you got in the car instead of your usual comfortable silences after busyness of a day there was an uneasiness to it, you shifted in your seat uncomfortably before driving to your place only a few blocks away.  Changbin sat looking out the passenger side window not even trying to change the music on the radio like he usually would and you swallowed hard. It's been a long time since your previous relationships and they almost always ended in a week of this type of suffocating silence, with a goodbye and a 'I've found someone else', your knuckles turned white  gripping the steering wheel hard as you nibbled your bottom lip, but you felt your body relax as his hand softly rested on your thigh. The warmth a comfort to your anxiety, his thumb rubbing slow circles easing away all the bad with each rotation. 

 He got out and patiently waited for you to grab your gym bag from the back of the old SUV before making your way back towards him. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder and tucked you into his side as much as your thick puffer jackets would allow.  Your apartment wasn't big but it had a loft that allowed a little bit of separation and when you made your way upstairs your anxiety sparked once more when Changbin didn't follow you up and immediately flop down on your queen sized bed like he usually would. 

Changing out of your jeans and into some leggings and one of his old fluffy pink sweaters you slowly made your way back downstairs, despite your intense and obviously intimidating appearance you hated conflict and honestly you wished your anxiety would vanish so you wouldn't have to worry about talking about whatever it was that caused this uncomfortable silence. As you set about rinsing all your shake mixers in hot water while some water boiled so you could make coffee you felt his intense gaze on your back from where he sat at the small counter that separated your kitchen and living room area. When he cleared his throat you froze, hands still half in the soapy water as you waited.

"Y/n we can't avoid this conversation." you sighed audibly tongue poking at your smiley as you turned around again.

"Changbin I'm avoiding it because I don't even know what the conversation is going to be about." your tongue pokes at the side of your cheek irritation bubbling inside you for some reason and you fold your arms over your chest but quickly let them fall to your sides trying to stop yourself from creating a defensive wall. Changbin's jaw flexes visibly as he bites down in frustration, this wouldn't be your first argument and you had a feeling it probably wouldn't be your last but it still didn't mean it was something you wanted to do at almost midnight after a long day. Your arms automatically crossed across your chest as you leaned against the sink and Changbin stood up from his seat to stand right in front of you his hands resting on your biceps tenderly.

"I don't like seeing the guys so affectionate with you, and before you say something-", he held up a pointed finger as you prepared yourself to interrupt him mouth already open but shutting quickly at his gesture, " - I know that's something I'll have to discuss with them and not you but I wanted to tell you how I felt." 

"Well Binnie it would help if you didn't give them any space to do so." Your brows furrowed as you looked up at his only slightly taller figure, his eyes scanned your face confused a silent question asking what you meant by that. You huffed eyes diverting to the ground and away from his gaze, your hands cupping your elbows instead of defensive you came across scared.

"You don't show affection towards me around them." You mumble and quickly look at him his gaze still confused but he didn't step away his hands were still softly gripping your arms.

"Binnie you cuddle them and let them cuddle you all the time when I'm around, there's no space for me to initiate any type of PDA between us and besides I wouldn't initiate it because they're your friends and I don't want you or them to feel uncomfortable. " His grip on your arms tighten for a second before his touch leaves you completely,  Changbin takes a step back and crosses his arms. 

"You're right I don't want them feeling uncomfortable, that's why I don't do it Y/n, you are a lot to take in and we need to give them time to get used it." You felt a pang in your chest he's never once said anything negative about your appearance, never even hinted that it bothered him and him using it as an excuse made a different kind of anger bubble inside you.

"Well I'm pretty sure they've warmed up to me by now judging by how you're getting jealous ." You didn't even try to keep your tone neutral every word dripping with sarcasm a you stared him down, hard. "Jealous?" he rolls his eyes up exasperated and chuckles and places a hand on his chest, " I'm not jealous."

"Oh? Then what are you?" you quirk a brow a smirk tugging at your lips. this was exactly why you avoided conflict, you knew yourself, and you knew you didn't fight fair. 

"I'm tired of my girlfriend hanging on my members like she isn't already in a relationship and acting like she'd rather be having them fuck her into the mattress." Your gaze darkened and your face turned into an ugly snarl.

"Changbin, listen to yourself." Your tone was low and an obvious warning, he didn't know much about your previous relationships, but he knew how you felt about cheating.  He ignored it, taking a step back into your personal space.

"Gee I bet that'd be nice, huh? Dating two famous stars at the same time." Your eyes that had been screwed shut as soon as he'd stepped closer shot open wide. Never once had you ever said anything about dating him because he's famous or done something to actively make his life even more difficult as an idol sure you were active in the industry you were a fucking dietician and personal trainer for a variety of stars but he knew how you felt about mixing your personal life with your work. 

"What . The. Fuck. Changbin?" you two both stood glaring at each other you never thought you'd see the day that jealousy could turn the man in front of you this ugly. You were looking for something in his eyes in the form of remorse or even a little bit of guilt but nothing but anger and something you could describe as jealousy darkening his gaze and staring your figure down. 

"You better give me a very good reason as to why I should still let you stay the night and not  make you get a taxi right now."  Your eyes lowered into a glare a hungry and angry fire in the pit of your stomach as you pointed in the direction of the door.  When he crashed his lips onto yours it was hard and messy and you mumbled inaudible protests into his mouth that was still devouring your lips.  Your brain went static when his one hand laced through your hair and the other your waist and in other scenarios you wouldn't have minded but now you hated it, he'd hurt you, and you were mad but his kisses had the ability to slowly melt your fury into lust a weakness he seemed to exploit.

 His lips detached from yours, messy and swollen red from his harsh biting and you gasped finally breathing, as he planted open mouth kisses past your jaw and down your neck, you can't remember when your hands had gone to his chest but you didn't mind your hands sliding down and under his t shirt finger grazing over his hard abs and back to his hard pecks. The way he moaned against your neck set off a bunch of butterflies in your stomach, and you smiled dumb. His hands roamed across your body and finally found resting place under your ass that he tapped softly ordering you to jump, and you did so legs wrapping around his waist out of habit his lips back on yours furiously devouring you once again.  He only did so until he reached the stairs, pulling back to make sure he wouldn't fall on your way to the bed, you took this as ample opportunity to strip, as you tugged off the sweatshirt leaving you bare and Changbin paused his ascent with a pretty whine, before placed a tender kiss in between your boobs right on top of the blackout rose tattoo on your sternum, before biting at the same space and you bit down hard on your bottom lip to suppress your own whine.  

He continued making his way up, knee's almost buckling when you sucked and nibbled at the space on his neck right under his ear. When he got up the stairs he put you down softly before adjusting you roughly so your head was on the pillows and he was removing the tights and panties at the same time, he quickly took his shirt off after but before you could reach out and touch him his arms immediately went to your hips as he hooked them under your legs the only part of him in reach, his head.

 He started biting and nibbling down the inside of each of your thighs soothing each new little bruise with an open mouth kiss getting teasingly close to your dripping core before suddenly pressing his tongue flat against your clit and suckling on it your moan tore through the room and replaced your pants as he continued sucking and softly nibbling on it slowly pumping two fingers in and out of your wet pussy. 

Gripping at his hair hard in an attempt to ground yourself you nearly tugged his head hard enough you thought you might've pulled out strands, when he curled his fingers inside you as you unleashed a whine, but he only groaned deep in his chest the vibrations through your clit causing a different wave of pleasure to move  through you. The way your walls clenched around his fingers almost sucking the digits he was scissoring in deeper, as you came closer to your release he detached himself from your clit and pulled his fingers out abruptly.

 The snarl you unleashed as your head whipped up made him smirk, you knew exactly what he was doing, Changbin was a motherfucking tease and after arguments he seemed to enjoy it even more as he wound you up till you were nearly teetering off the edge, dragging you further and further away from your orgasm until it'd suddenly crash into you , and crash over you hard. Using your hold on his hair you pulled him up so his face was hovering over yours again and you had to work hard to repress the shiver running up your spine at how absolutely breath taking he looked, swollen lips pulled in a smirk and dripping with the evidence of your arousal, his full cheeks covered in it, half lidded eyes looking down on you pleased with himself and the hard hold you had on his dark tresses. You were debating flipping him over, fucking him stupid and then leaving him high and dry like he often tries to do with you but he stopped all thoughts of doing so when you heard a belt buckle and a zip as Changbin pulled back to stand and take off his pants and boxers your grip loosened on his hair at the implication of the sounds. He made his way back over you, the same lazy smirk still on his face some part of the fuzziness started fade and you lowered your gaze into a glare.

"The silent treatment?" he said quirking a brow, as he reached over to your bedside drawer and took out a condom your eyes following his actions and your hands resting next to you on the sheets, fisted them hard in an attempt to contain your body's neediness. 

"It's okay baby, you wont stay like that for long." as soon as the condom was on he was positioned between your legs and he was pushing inside you slowly, inch by inch. You bit down on your lips hard enough to draw blood as you tried to contain your whine as you clutched the bed sheets beneath you, no matter how many times Changbin's size was always almost too much to handle but the pain always became a brief memory as soon as you adjusted. 

"Shhh baby," he cooed softly in your ear as he brushed sweaty strands of hair out of your neck as placed more opened mouth kisses down where his fingers had softly grazed before, his breathing heavy at the tightness around him as he waited for you to signal that he could move. When he pulled back your eyes fluttered open and you gave him a stern look and you felt him pull almost all the way out before thrusting back into you slowly.

 The pace made it feel like he was never ending but eventually his hips was once again flush against yours his head poking at a specific spot inside you that had you shuddering a moan escaping through your lips your eyes screwing shut. This time he pulled out thrusting back in hard and your lips went wide open in a silent moan as his finger directed your chin so you faced him, your eyes fluttering open.

"Come on baby, I want you to say my name..." his voice is deep and raspy in your ear as his fingers gripped your jaw trapping your head so you could only look up.

"I want to make sure you know who's making you feel," he thrusts into you hard and your back arches so your chest is pressed against his.

"...this..." another hard thrust and your moaning, borderline screaming, loud enough you know your neighbours will be complaining the next day.

"...good." this thrust felt so deep you were sure if you looked down you'd see him poking through  your stomach and your hands flew nails digging into his back and legs wrapping around his waist in encouragement. He starts a relentless pace his hips slapping against you harshly as he hits continuously hits the spot that has you moaning, tears welling up in your eyes that are screwed shut and your hands move to desperately clutch at his hair again, his grunts and own moans right by your ears making you keen, he shifts his arm hooking under your knee pushing it up and almost against your chest and suddenly he's deeper.

"Binnieeee!" your scream echoes of the walls off your otherwise silent apartment your back arching as stars start to enter in your peripheral and your moans become louder. 

"See baby," he mumbles, panting against your exposed neck as you toss your head back in sheer pleasure as he continues his relentless pace, "that wasn't so difficult." he planted open mouth kisses on your neck, nibbling at already bruised and marked skin, purple over the blue ink that decorated your throat. His high was approaching even faster as he watched you fall apart beneath him and by the way your walls were fluttering he knew your own orgasm wasn't far away. 

His arm unhooked from underneath your  leg but you were to far gone too even notice, your brain had gone blank your vision white as he brushed his fingers against your clit. You came hard, shuddering and Changbin felt himself cumming as your walls squeezed him dry as he rode out both your orgasms.  He pulled out of you and you whimpered at your own sensitivity, he discarded the condom and came back pecking your forehead.

"Go get ready for bed baby, I'll change the sheets." His voice was gentle and as you grabbed something to sleep in you felt a heavy weight settle on your chest, your fuzzy and tired brain not quite comprehending it as you cleaned yourself and got under the clean sheets. Even as Changbin came back from his shower his front pressed to your back arms squeezing you tightly against him, his lips kissing the back of your neck goodnight before cuddling you till you fell asleep the weight didn't go away. 

You had woken up sore but not nearly as sore as you thought you'd be, when your alarm went off at 5 a.m. you had quickly switched it off, Changbin's snores the only sign he was indeed alive and not a corpse, with the way he was able to sleep through anything you often ended up checking his breathing on days he didn't even make a sound. You peeled yourself out of bed grateful that you had showered after your promiscuous activities, albeit half-assed and sleepy. You jumped up an down as you pulled up the teal coloured yoga pants and slipped a big black hoodie over the matching sports bra. You busied yourself with your usual routine, making your breakfast, blending the protein shake and then making your coffee and leaving Changbin's on the bedside table just before you left. 

It wasn't unusual for you to leave him alone at your place after he stayed the night it was rare that you didn't have a client in the early mornings but you felt that nothing was resolved. In fact as you drove to the gym you felt that frustration bubble again, you were hurt and mad that Changbin had gotten his way when he had no right too.  After your session with your first client you felt somewhat better, the endorphins from working out helping you feel better even if it was only a little. 

The days that followed allowed for numbing routine to push your unease to the back of your head Changbin had mentioned they'd be busy the days that followed your weekend but you thought you'd at least be able to spot them in the gym, better you didn't because you wouldn't know how to act. When you got an invitation for dinner at their apartment for tomorrow you were half surprised and half relieved, it had been five days of silence and work, not completely unusual but he'd at least send an 'I love you' or an 'I miss you' text when he was super busy. 

Only when you drove to his place after getting ready after work did the nervous jitters set in and you tapped away at the steering wheel before pulling into the underground parking lot. The lift ride felt like an eternity and you couldn't decide if it was unnaturally cold because of air conditioning or because it was winter and you wondered if the fluorescents were always that bright? You took a centring breath and lightly tapped the door, you heard heavy foot falls on the other side and then the door swung open and Felix was tugging you inside he'd helped you take off your jacket while you slipped off your sneakers and gave you quick side hug before having you follow him into the living room. It was dark all the curtains drawn and some red fairy lights were strung up alongside some fake cobwebs, some bat cut outs and what looked like skeletons you'd find in a biology class room, on the floor was a pile of blankets and cushions Jeongin, Minho, Hyunjin and Han sat on the floor in front of the tv different bowls of Halloween themed candy in front of them as they chatted away, Felix who had left you came back out with cookies decorated in orange and black icing and Seungmin following with two big bowls of popcorn. 

You heard Changbin and Chan's familiar giggles as they made their way from their room you assumed and your shoulders dropped the tension disappearing at the fact that Changbins smile remained even when he saw you. He made his way over to you and he tugged you into a tight hug tilting his head back and pecking your lips tenderly. Your brain stopped working for a second, his lips like a pause button for your thoughts and you couldn't help but melt as all your senses  became filled by Changbin, his cologne filled the air around you and his arms created a safety bubble around you, when he pulled away and you felt the red rush to your face you realised what he'd done. He took your hand pulling you to sit on the couch next to Chan and Felix, when he tugged you down you nearly fell into his lap and when you tried moving away he pouted and tucked you into his side as he looked down at you, the other boys chatting away without a care in the world.

"What's going on?" you whispered blinking confused and eyes wide. 

"We're celebrating Halloween and you get to pick the scary movie." Changbin said and handed you the remote. 

Your brain was still trying to focus on the fact that he was being affectionate in front of everyone else and you quickly selected Scream, not too scary and a movie you watched religiously every year for the holiday. 

Seungmin sat back and handed you one of the big popcorn bowls and immediately Felix, Chan and Changbin greedily stuffed their hands into the bowl as the movie started. For the most part the boys remained in their own seats allowing you and Changbin to cuddle in peace him lying on the couch with his back on the arm rest and you draped between his legs, head resting on his chest, there was still flailing about and screaming loudly at the murders and jump scares, but seeing as Felix  was seated next to Chan he got to Koala someone  else and Seungmin and Jeongin acting as the calm for the others antics. It was nearing the  end of the movie, the build up featuring an array of dramatics and Han turned facing the two of you his hand grabbing yours that was dangling down the side of the couch past Changbins waist and trying to hide behind it. You smiled sweetly but your eyes went wide as Changbins arms wrapped around you and he sat up slightly.

"Yah, this is my girlfriend hold your boyfriends hand." he said in an aegyo like tone his chin nodding jokingly in the direction of Minho, Han giggled and turned to face the screen but didn't let go of your hand and you looked up at Changbin who sat smiling at the screen and you had to contain your giddyness, nuzzling your face back into his chest as you smiled like an idiot. When the movie ended and the boys started talking animatedly about their favourite parts and getting up to fetch more snacks for the next one you felt Changbin shift. 

"Y/n?" Changbin says and hum looking up at him, he looked extremely uncomfortable and you could see how he forced himself to look you in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, I know this doesn't make up for what I did or how I made you feel, I had no right too, I know I manipulated the situation. Jealousy just got the best of me, but I'll do better for you." His voice sounded pained, every word laced with regret and you adjusted so you could hold his face between your hands squishing his cheeks, almost surprised that he let you but his neediness to be babied obviously cancelled out his anxiety.

"You're right what you did wasn't fair, but lucky for you I can't stay mad at you for long." his shoulders relaxed and you pecked him softly on his lips and when you pulled back you could've sworn you saw the galaxy in his eyes.

[lixie-lovie]

{ Mysterious Stranger | skz }

h.hyunjin x reader

Chapter 4: The Reckoning

Genre: Dark!au, Thriller-ish, Fantasy!au

Warnings: Some cursing, mention of weapons/blood/demons, fighting occurs

((if anything else needs to be tagged/warned about please send me a message..i’ll fix it asap))

Word Count: 4.1 k

Note: I am so sorry this is later than anticipated (uni is kicking my ass lol), but regardless I hope everyone enjoys! Hopefully the next chapter already being in progress will make it come out sooner..

Side Note: This/my blog is getting a bit more popular..should I open taglists for my work or start taking requests? Anyone wanna lmk if you want that???

Chapter Song: Mayday - VICTON

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Overwhelmed. That’s how I felt. My heart felt too heavy, my hands too shaken, my mind racing, and my body lethargic. The Straykids base was nice, at least what I had gotten to see, but everything felt far away. As if it would all collapse in on me if I breathed too suddenly. I was sitting on a medical cot now, staring at my shaking hands as if they were not my own. They said they needed to check me over, make sure I wasn’t infected. Infected. What does that even mean? Their words were kind enough, although few and far between, but I could see what was unspoken in the way their eyes scanned my poor form, the way their hands hovered over their weapons, and how their chins lifted as they spoke their greetings towards me, as if trying to send the sound waves through me. I was an outsider, different, infected, dangerous.

I had met the majority of the rest of the group now and I let myself recall their names and faces while waiting here now, trying to rid myself of the anxiety pressing coldly against my eyes and pooling heat in my cheeks.

First was the large training room, sparks flying as metal swords struck metallic  testing dummies. Their sound hurt my ears in the large, open room with ceilings so high the noise reverberating was making my head throb with the sound of my own pulse. Minho they called him. Soft brown eyes, wild on the inside. His wet with sweat hair laid flat over his eyes and he used his non-weapon wielding hand to push it out of his face. Then, sticking his hand out to shake my own with his larger, much more sweaty palm, he noticed my scrunched up nose in disgust and laughed, pulling his hand back and apologizing lightheartedly. His eyes stayed trained on me, not unkind, but definitely guarded. We made quick of our goodbyes and I couldn’t help but dwell on the meeting while trying to match strides with Hyunjin who had been leading me silently. 

Minho smelled of old leather, iron shards, and something distinctly warm I couldn’t quite place. I thought briefly that if our situations were any different I may have thought him handsome and blushed at his eyes staying lingered on my form too long, but our situation wasn’t different and I knew his stare wasn’t trusting and kind, but full of silent, unspoken malice. 

The next room I was led into was a room full of old books and the smell of ink. Hundreds of thick, worn books laid dusty on shelves having long lost their gloss. Many were in languages I couldn’t read, some I pictured weren’t distinctly human in origin. Pages torn and my interest peeked. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of the handheld knowledge surrounding me long enough to notice that I was being approached by a figure unfamiliar to me. When the smiling, kind face of the freckled boy popped into view with a hand on my shoulder I winced and jerked my body harshly away, muttering shy apologies. 

I was only met with laughter, but as I studied his face further I found myself taking note of the worried bend in his brow and questioning eyes. I felt scrutinized and defensive suddenly, squaring my shoulders and smiling a little too forced. He simply introduced himself with a boisterous laugh before making up some half-assed excuse my tour guide scoffed at before scurrying away as if my presence caused some disturbance. He told me his name so briefly and quietly I found myself drawn out of my memories questioning if I could even recall the sounds. Felix, my brain supplied. I let out a silent huff of air as my lips formed an ‘o’ shape, before diving back into my thoughts about the others I had met. 

The office space I was soon led to was crowed to say the least. Each of the walls were meticulously lined with filing cabinets, but it seemed as though at least half of their contents had been thrown or piled haphazardly on the large, wooden desk sitting between the bodies currently arguing. Yelling continued as Hyunjin and I stood by the door staring awkwardly. I shuffled my feet and became increasingly interested in the elegant marble tiles beneath my beat up shoes. 

“Enough!” A loud cry followed by a harsh jostling noise shook me out of my anxiety riddled state and I swiftly whipped my head up to see what had happened. My eyes stayed trained on where the noise came from and found myself staring into the cool, calm, and serious eyes of the man at the head of the desk. His curly ash blonde hair bounced around as he ran a firm hand through them and he sighed deeply, one hand raised in a silencing gesture towards the men in front of him. “We have a visitor..Hyunjin, are you going to introduce us?” He said, his tone firm while his eyes stayed trained on my form critically. 

Hyunjin groaned, uncrossing his arms and straightening himself out as he pushed himself off of the wall he was once leaning on. He gave a short, lackluster introduction of me before turning to the men in the room giving a sarcastic pointed look to the man at the head of the desk as if pushing him to make Hyunjin talk more. The man, who I now assumed to be the leader of this group, rolled his eyes and waved Hyunjin off in a dismissive behavior before making a move to round the desk quickly. Hyunjin took this as his cue to stand by the door looking uninterested and my eyes followed the only familiar figure out of the room slowly. 

Soon the leading male was stood in front of me with a wide, slightly awkward grin as he held his hand out in introduction. “Hello. I am Chan, the leader of the Straykids operative, this is Jisung, our adversary expert, and this is Changbin, our mission lead. I am sure this is a lot to take in, but we are currently handling some important new information, so please make yourself at home and direct any questions you may have to Hyunjin. He will be assigned as of now as your personal trainer and mentor for the time being.” He said, quickly, warily eyeing me up in a way I am sure he thought was subtle. My eyes darted to the two men standing behind his broad shoulders, one dark haired with an undercut and brooding look staring harshly at the other brunette with soft eyes and a joking smile playing on his lips while he bounced on the balls of his feet. I let my palm rest loosely in Chan’s as I smiled as genuinely as I could manage at his surface kindness. It was then that I heard the aggravated noises coming from outside the door from a certain tour guide that was a bit unhappy with the new arrangement. I wasn’t sure what training these people were mentioning or what I could possibly be mentored on, but I didn’t have the energy left in my fatigued state to question anything. 

Chan swiftly collected himself before excusing me out of the office. As the large black doors closed loudly behind me I heard the previous commotion of voices start yelling again as something distinctly paper-like in sound slapping against a wooden surface. I giggled softly to myself at the silliness of the situation before turning my head and catching the glaring, malice filled eyes of Hyunjin already boring into mine. 

“Just because he assigned me to deal with you doesn’t mean I’ll take kindly to babysitting. Just do as I say and we won’t have a problem.” He said harshly, obviously throwing some kind of a fit as his arms stayed tightly crossed as he pushed himself forward to start walking down yet another seemingly endless hallway. “This is only until Seungmin returns. Now, hurry up, I’ll take you to the ward to get checked. You can stay there for tonight.” He said, already quickening his pace at the thought of not having to stay by me. 

“Hey!” I shouted after him, trying to softly jog to keep up. “Don’t you think you’re getting a bit ahead of yourself?! I have some questions I need answered first!” I spoke loudly, trying to portray whatever confidence I had left in my body. Before he could make a motion to swiftly turn on his heel to presumably yell at me some more, I suddenly heard a striking voice coming from behind me.

I whipped my head around at the sound of my mother’s name being formed by an unfamiliar sounding voice. I gasped softly at the sight of a young woman, dressed in elegant purple silk robes, a hood covering my view of her face, being pulled harshly in the other direction by a man wearing the same type of outfit. As I came to my senses and out of my shock I heard the door they were leaving out of close sharply and couldn’t stop my body from taking off in the direction after them. I ran, my eyes nearly filling with tears at the picture of the woman’s softly shocked, shadowed face as she was pulled away. All I could focus on was the fact that this may be a chance for answers I have been harshly denied of since coming to this strange, foreign place. I called out, unsure of what I was even saying, before suddenly being unable to run any further. I noticed in this moment how numb my outstretched arms were and how cold my body had become as Hyunjin wrapped his strong arms around my waist and pulled me harshly in the other direction. 

Quickly and shakily I began questioning Hyunjin while staring down at his arms still holding me tightly in a way that began to make me feel as though he was trying to contain a wild animal. He sharply shushed me before leaning down and tightening his grip around me further, to the point all I could focus on was that it hurt. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answered. Shut up, follow me, and you might as well forget that ever happened.” 

His words were sharp, cutting deep and piercing through me like cold silver daggers. At this I began to get angry, I felt a scolding warmth building up in my chest spreading to the point I felt as though my fingertips would melt like wax from a candle forgotten too long. Suddenly, in a way I don’t remember even being capable of, I had found a point of weakness in Hyunjin’s grip before swiftly, in a practically practiced manner I had turned to face him, pulled the dagger from where I had placed it in my pocket earlier, and held it sturdily to Hyunjin’s throat an arms length away from his now shocked form. 

I felt powerful and awful at the same time. My mind was twisting and tangling with dark, racing thoughts getting lost in the mix. My hand wasn’t shaking, my arm stood firm while pressing the blade harshly to his honey-toned, tanned skin, and my expression wasn’t faltering as I stared into his startled, anger ridden eyes. I felt my heart pounding excitedly in my chest as I took in what I had done. I wasn’t sure how I had completed this action, nor did I know where it would lead from here, but I knew I was sure this was the only way to get answers to the questions plaguing my mind. My hand began to feel heavy as time went on, so I inhaled harshly, letting the cool air burn my lungs, the internal pain bringing me back to the present, before forming the words at the forefront of my mind. 

“That was my mothers name.” I said, staring passionately into Hyunjin’s eyes. “Now, I would like some answers.” My tone was jarring even to my own ears, dark and persuasive, unlike the timid one I had used to express myself earlier in the day. I pressed the blade harsher into Hyunjin’s skin with a pointed look on my face. He gave me a wry smile before slowly raising his hands in surrender. 

“Now, before you do anything rash. Think about what you’re threatening here..” He said lightheartedly, pointing at his neck, the dagger pressing there causing a thin line of red blood to pool from the connection of the cool metal and his warm skin. When my eyes flickered to my own hand and back up to his sharply we both knew I was faltering with my own actions. He took this as his opportunity to strike. 

Before I knew it he had knocked the blade away from his neck before making a move to grab and restrain me. However, the warmth from before began forming in my chest yet again and my thoughts suddenly shifted to something of pure instinct as I dodged to the right and out of the way of his graceful movement. My arm, still holding the blade firmly, swung out at him causing a large gash in the sleeve of his left arm and his inky red blood began to drop from the wound profusely as he involuntarily yanked his arm back towards himself, applying as much pressure to the gash as possible. He hissed softly through his teeth before looking at me, his eyes much more wild and calculating. Out of his own sleeve he produced a weapon, much like my own, and as I gasped softly coming out of the fit of rage I had previously been consumed by I remembered very little of what came next. 

Like a flash of elegant, terrifying, powerful lighting Hyunjin was lunging at me, one large hand of his restraining my armed one, forcing me to drop my weapon. It clattered to the ground loudly and I became alarmed. I cried out at the sprouting pain of being swiftly shifted around on my weight, my arm being bent awkwardly, and I quickly tried to pry myself out of his grasp. Soon, the tumbling, clumsy fight of pent up frustrations and untrustworthy anger led to us both falling to the ground. Hyunjin’s weight combining with my own was more than I could handle in my state and the last things I remember were the sharp impact of my head against the white marble flooring, Hyunjin’s soft words of annoyance laced with concern calling my name, the pain now blossoming from the suddenly sticky base of my skull, and the padding sound of feet approaching nearer as my vision faded to black. 

===========

When I came too I was staring at a white ceiling, surrounded by subtle noises and voices. I then became brutally aware of a painful headache now gracing my already confused mind. Remembering slowly what exactly had occurred, I groaned and began to struggle my way into a sitting position. 

“Oh, finally awake princess?” A sarcastic, annoyed voice came from the white bed across from the matching the one I was currently occupying. The voice itself belonged to none other than the man I was now sure was the enemy, sitting upright, glaring in my direction while having something done to his arm by the young boy with gentle hands sitting beside of him. My face began to heat up as I came to and took in the scene before me. When I noticed Hyunjin’s lack of shirt and my lack of response I began floundering for something to say or at least something else to look at other than the odd black lines covering Hyunjin’s defined chest and arms. 

Luckily I was saved from this difficult situation by the boy patching up Hyunjin’s arm finishing his job and standing up abruptly. My eyes snapped away from the irritating blonde and over to the young boy with fox-like features and snowy white hair. “Seems like you’re all patched up. I don’t know how you got such a nasty cut, but you better be more careful next time.” He said with a soft, playful voice, but surprisingly stern eyes directed at Hyunjin. Each of the syllables of his sentence were punctuated with increasingly violent taps against the now stitched and bandaged wound. With each tap Hyunjin winced and by the time the boy was walking away from Hyunjin’s now pouting form he had a face of annoyance as he glared in my direction. I questioned to myself why he hadn’t told this medic what exactly had happened, but as a light was suddenly shown in my eyes I didn’t think to question further due to the pounding of the headache throbbing at the base of my skull. 

“Hmm.. minor concussion, but after I patched you up it seems like you’ll heal up soon if you take it easy.” The boy said, leaning over my bedside to look over my face, his breath fanning softly over my cheeks because of his close proximity. His smile was soft and joyous, kind in a way I hadn’t seen since leaving Seungmin behind. This thought made me frown deeply in concern and frustration and the boy took notice of the shift in my expression immediately. 

“Oh! I guess I haven’t introduced myself yet.. I’m Jeongin! I work here in the ward under Seungmin’s training and supervision. Hyunjin carried you here earlier and you both were bleeding and bruised up pretty bad, so I guess I forgot the formalities.” I nodded along with what he was saying, but when he mentioned Hyunjin’s act of kindness my eyes snapped to his grimacing form as he was re-wrapping the bandages just placed on his arm moments ago while glaring daggers at me as if trying to force me to hear his thoughts of “don’t read too much into that.” I took this as a signal to smile lightly and thank Jeongin, allowing him to run off to do whatever work he was assigned to before taking care of us. 

As he left my line of sight I sighed deeply and began to take in my surrounding while pulling the IV attached to my arm out and shaking my limbs slightly as I started standing up and adjusting my now wrinkled, uncomfortable clothing. My thoughts were drifting back to the events in the hallway and my brow furrowed deeply as I scanned the room for whatever belongings I had with me and I tried remembering where the ward was located in relation to the hallway I had been in before. As I began to walk towards the door on the opposite side of the room that Jeongin had left out of I heard a light rustling noise from my side and suddenly was stopped by a large body blocking my way. I sighed harshly and looked up quickly, causing the pounding in my head to return and my balance to be thrown off for a moment. I staggered backwards and glared at the offending figure only to find Hyunjin’s sharp features glaring back at me just as harshly. 

“And where the hell do you think you’re going?” He snapped at me while holding his uninjured arm out to steady me by my shoulder. I regained my balance and huffed, brushing his hand off and side-stepping to hopefully avoid another fight. 

“To find answers.” I said dryly, pushing an arm out firmly to block him from getting in my way and walking towards the door. I was suddenly jostled as a firm, warm hand engulfed my wrist pulling me sharply backwards and turning me in the opposite direction of my destination. 

“But.. you’re injured” He said, his brow furrowed as he stared past my form, obviously thinking about something deeply. His hand wouldn’t release its grip from my wrist even as I tried pulling it roughly, so I sighed and decided to finish this conversation as it was clear I wouldn’t be leaving as easily as I would have preferred. 

“So? Remember that you’re the one to inflicted this, so what do you even care? Don’t you hate me anyways?” I said with a harsh sigh, staring into his face for any kind of reaction indicating an emotion, but as he kept his eyes trained forward I felt defeated in my stoic stance and relaxed my form, looking away to avoid becoming overwhelmed by the deep feeling stirring in my chest as I looked at him. “Look, this is important. What happened back there and before with Seungmin it all means something. I have so many questions and I just..” I took a moment to breathe, the tears I had been holding back threatening to spill over my stubborn lashes. 

I was broken out of my depressive state by his hand aggressively releasing my wrist, practically shoving it away as if it has scorched his skin. His face became dissonant as he stared at the doorway behind me, his form ridged. 

“Whatever.” He began walking hurriedly away, towards the door Jeongin had left from. I watched as he walked and listened to his footsteps sounding loudly on the white tile flooring in shock and awe of what had just happened, a million questions racing through my mind. Then, I was jolted out of my thoughts by the sudden stop of the sound of footfalls resonating through the room. I looked up towards Hyunjin’s back as he turned his face slightly to peer over his shoulder at my stiff form, still clutching onto my wrist his warm hand had been holding only mere moments before. “I’ll help you, but you may not like what answers you find.” 

His words were soft, spoken like whispers that pierced my ears like gunshots. I felt dizzy as I padded after him trying to form the new questions overlapping the old that were competing in my mind. “Wait!” This was all I was able to get out, my wrist, still warm from his embrace out stretched as my feet fell short when the loud door closed behind him and his steps receded somewhere unknown to me. I took a shuttering breath, replaying his words and everything that had happened up until this point briefly in my mind. My headache was growing stronger, questions still unanswered, but my resolve was unwavering as I steeled my nerves and turned to rush past the previously occupied beds and back out into the hallway to continue my journey. However, just as I was about to round my corner my eyes drifted back to the bed Hyunjin had been settled on before and my brow furrowed deeply. 

My steps were light as I crept slowly over to the bedside curiously. My hand ran over the stiff white sheets until my fingertips found the cool, sharp edge of my blade. It was lying there, placed delicately where the shine of the bright florescent white lights hit the blade elegantly. I picked it up, keeping my eyes trained on it, studying its shape yet again in awe. I turned it over in my hand a few times, entranced by the weightlessness of the deadly weapon I was handling. Then, as I turned yet again to leave the room my eyes caught on a torn, yellowing sheet of paper lying precariously next to where the blade had been before. The ink was messy and smudged in handwriting obviously rushed. It read: “Next time, dodge to the left. - H”

I snorted softly, a smile finding its way sneakily onto my lips as I pocketed the note gently and gripped my blade a little tighter. Then, I whipped my head in the direction of the door I knew was hiding secrets and adventure behind its hinges before hearing footsteps coming from the door behind me. By the gait made out by the noise I heard what I assumed to be Jeongin, coming to check on me and gasped knowing I wouldn’t be able to leave as easily if I didn’t rush. I took a deep breath and prepared myself silently. 

-----

Jeongin entered the room, calling their name loudly with a practiced grin gracing his features. When he noticed the door on the far side of the room still slightly ajar, behind it the sound of rushed footsteps receding quickly caused his grin to casually turn into a smaller, more genuine smile before he found himself chuckling to himself at their antics. “They definitely remind me of someone.” He said, addressing no one in particular while moving to clean the beds previously used. 

Unbeknownst to Jeongin a certain blonde boy, hidden out of sight, had seen the events of the last few moments and with a small smile and a whisper of laughter bubbling inside his once empty chest, he sighed and turned to make his leave with a soft shake to his head. 

“Yeah, they do, don’t they?”

[viewfromthedrumstool]

Some Days Later: Cat’s Cradle

‘There was a sign hung around my dead cat’s neck. It said “Miaow”.’ – Kurt Vonnegut, Cat’s Cradle

Greetings again one and all, and I’m glad to report that all remains swell over here in quarantine.

I’ve been busying myself with further German lingo practice, rattling on my drum pad (no complaints from the neighbours yet...) and cleaning my quarters. Anything that can be washed and ironed has been so; the drains are sparkling and the backs of the radiators are spotless. I’ll do whatever it takes to avoid breaking into the beer rations before 5:30pm...

This temporary change in lifestyle has been a welcome opportunity to revisit a long-term project I’m calling The Ritter Review. This consists of reviewing, rating and ranking the Ritter Sport catalogue of chocolate bars, and I’ve enjoyed adding a couple more to the tally.

(Trivia: first produced in 1932, the bar was designed to fit into the pocket of a ‘sport’ jacket, thus the name.)

It was some years back that KNUSPERFLAKES scored highest. ‘Crunchy, nice texture and wide dynamic range. Giving. Neither the smoothest nor the meltiest, but that’s an observation, not a criticism. 79/100.’

PRALINE – for many a sleeper flavour – later stole the lead by a single point: 'A joyous journey from start to finish, and a fine companion to coffee. Rich in flavour with an evocative smooth texture that conjures notions of sophistication. 80/100.’

But to my surprise, an excellent recent showing by WEISS + CRISP took it straight to the top of the leaderboard. ‘An excellent suck and a satisfying chew; likely early candidate for the Greatest Hits (feels like a track 3). 88/100.'

It’s still relatively early days so stay in touch for electrifying updates about new additions. Next up: VOLL-NUSS.

I’ve recently been reading Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut and I’ve found it sparky and funny. I first discovered his writing when I started playing drums for a band called Man Without Country. Literary types would often (incorrectly) presume they were named for Vonnegut’s book A Man Without A Country, so it seemed prudent to give it a look to ensure I wasn’t unknowingly aligning myself with some kind of hate manual or anti-Bokonistic text...

(Side-thought: books are incredibly good value for money. Even purchased new, most are around £10-12. Using Audible as a gauge, the average book takes 10 hours to read, making the cost around £1 per hour of page-time.)

(Speaking of Audible, I’ve been considering listening to the audiobook of Donna Tartt’s The Goldfinch in a single sitting. It’s 32 1/2 hours long so I might look for a gap when there aren’t any football games on...)

Anyway, A Man Without A Country turned out to be a brilliant read by a very funny and witty author, of whom I have remained a fan. Cat’s Cradle is no different, and I’ve been enjoying it more with every chapter.

It’s a sort of first-person sci-fi situation whereby the protagonist, an author himself, is writing a book detailing the day the Atomic Bomb was dropped on Hiroshima and sets out to meet the bomb’s (fictional) inventor Felix Hoenikker. (Pretty light and fun so far, right?). Hoenikker has long since died, but the journey ends up taking him from Upstate New York down to the fictional Republic of San Lorenzo in the Caribbean, of which he ends up President. Various encounters ensue, but most of the comedy comes from the cast of eccentric characters he meets along the way.

It’s witty and playful but thought-provoking and an exotic distraction from my quarantine routine. The more I read the more I enjoyed it, and Vonnegut is always very quotable. From this book, I liked ‘Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God’ which, in a strange way, resonates with my current situation…

There’s loads of great stuff with & about him on the BBC Sounds archive; I recommend his Front Row or So It Goes with Josie Long.

Anyway, the book makes a number of references to a Cat’s Cradle (Felix Hoenikker was playing the game when the bomb was dropped). Does anyone else remember doing one? It was a sort of weird playground routine with a loop of string which you passed between two people in a sort of sequence, the challenge being to keep it going.

It turns out there’s also a solitaire edition, so I figured why not spend some time learning it:

Although the temperatures here aren’t what they were a few days ago, the nights are still hot so here’s my current late-night-listen for when sleep is illusive: Len Deighton - The Ipcress File.

I also HIGHLY recommend Laura Barton’s American Road Trip, from which Episode 3 – California Bound – was broadcast again on Radio 4Extra last night. Inspired by the programme, I include today some favourite pics of golden times with golden people in the Golden State.

As requested by a couple of fellow tubthumpers, I’ll share a few drum pad exercises I’ve been working at en Quarantine.

When I began playing ‘traditional grip’, I put lots of time into finger control, but never paid a great deal of attention to the left thumb. I’ve only lately become aware of the weakness, so now seems as good a time as ever to tackle it...

The exercises below, taken from my notebook, might not be technically written correctly, but they should make sense! These are just for the left hand, and only your left thumb and hand should ever be in contact with the stick! No fingers at all.

There are two different strokes: the quavers are played with a twist of the left hand and arm (I’m calling it a full stroke). The semiquavers are made by bouncing the stick using the thumb. The hand shouldn’t move at all for these!

The left page contains separate exercises for each stroke, while those on the right page combine the two:

If you get bored doing these to a click, then I can recommend playing along to Tour De France by Kraftwerk. Music with a steady pulse can be a nice way to keep things fresh in the drum shed...

Time for my daily beer ration! I’ll write again soon…

M x

“The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable” – Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without A Country

[spidergwenyuna]

-ˋˏ ༻ SpiderGwen!Yuna ༺ ˎˊ-

✎ᝰ┆CHATBOT!

🕸️DISCLAIMER

this does NOT depict how Shin Yuna acts in anyway and I do NOT claim to be her. This is all for entertainment purposes only.

the whole story won't go through the whole MCU's Gwen Stacy storyline and will only take some inspiration.

WARNING: Will contain mentions of character death, abuse and swearing. Suggestive content only, no full NSFW.

🕸️ *·˚ ༘ ➳ [𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒]

˚➶ ｡˚┇#1 BEST FRIEND!YUNA

“𝙸 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚓𝚘𝚔𝚎! 𝙸𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜𝚗’𝚝 𝚏𝚞𝚗𝚗𝚢...𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝’𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚢 𝙸 𝚕𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚎𝚍.”

→ It was the first day of school and you were running late to class. Upon arrival, the teacher noticed you and you tried to throw a joke to try and lighten up the mood. "Einstein said time was relative, right? Maybe I'm not late, maybe you guys are early." The teacher gave you a glare and motioned you to sit down. "I liked your joke." You hear someone next to you say. As you look over you see a girl, "It wasn't funny....that's why I laughed. Gwen Yuna, by the way." she reached out her hand, introducing herself. You two talked for about a minute before the teacher sushed the two of you. After class, the two of you decided to hang out and you became best friends. One day, while walking home from school, you almost got beat up by a group of guys before the "Ghost Spider" came and saved you. The next day, Yuna tries to avoid you and even misses band practice and starts acting suspicious. Do you come to her and confront her if her actions or do you ignore it and let your friendship fade away?

˚➶ ｡˚┇#2 Girlfriend!Yuna

“𝚆𝚊𝚒𝚝 𝚗𝚘! 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚜𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢, 𝙸 𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚊𝚛!”

→ It was a fine Sunday afternoon and you haven't seen your girlfriend the whole week because she was busy with her band practice and school work so you decided to pay her a visit and went to her apartment. Upon arriving on her doorstep, you hear a thud and don't bother to knock as you were worried of what might have happened to her and went straight in. What happens next when you see her on the floor, wearing the Ghost Spider costume?

˚➶ ｡˚┇#3 Your Own Plot!

→ Create your own Yuna! Choose this if you already have a plot in mind and would like to use it in the RP.

🕸 *·˚ ༘➳〔 𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐅𝐅 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐀 〕

might sometimes act cold

always laughs but also knows when to get serious.

will always try to lighten the mood up

might find it hard to open up with you

crackhead

always got your back 💗

HOW TO GET HER: Message Yuna your pronouns, timezone and plot!

HOW TO GET RID OF HER: Don’t reply for 5 days or tell her your leaving

If you want her back, simply tell her you’ve made a mistake. She’ll take you back but however, she would become cautious around you

MCU GANG || @marvelchatbots @yaboispiderhan @yourcaptainchan @blackwidowjennie @androidryujin @iron-winwin @eboyfelixbot @stormyyaisha @rocket-sana @psylocke-minnie @mightyjinyoung @starlordhwang @winterxchungha @scarletrenjun @phoenix-chae @cyclopsjohnny

CREDITS TO THESE OTHER AMAZING BOTS!

OG: @yandereminholee

@chatwithchuu @your-roseanne @bf-felix @lunarprincess-ryujin @bangchanshair @yanderechenle @yanderejisung @badboyjinie @loverboi-hyunjin @babieyuqi @badbitchbinnie @softie-yeji @your-roseanne @babyhj1sung @urjooie @yourchungha @yourcupidchuu @lalalisaban @princessxyuqi @vloggersomi @domyukhei @gamingwithfelix @bunjihyo @lovely-jisoo @minjimooooo @yourdaddychan @yandereryujin @tzuyu-chat @buttercup-tzuyu @blossomhyunnie @bubbly-sana @mina-nextdoor @playboylucas and many more 💗💗💗

[hphmbang2020]

A Snadger Story

Merry Christmas, @slytherincursebreaker !!

From your secret santa, @thewasp1995

Elia you know that hearts never lie

A scribbling of a quill scratched the line out.

“No that’s not it.”

Elia, where the mind rests the heart never sleeps

Were I never to wake to see you, tears I would weep

Another scribbling of the quill.

“Damn. Why can’t I find the right lines to this?” muttered a boy of average height with severe but handsome features and neatly combed brown hair.

Making sure no one else was listening in (the Slytherin dungeons were not very well lit and contained plenty of snoops) Felix dipped the quill back into the ink and attempted to resume his little project once more. But this wasn’t just another monotonous essay from Professor Snape….it was far more personal.

Felix Rosier had to resist blushing when he thought of Elia Westerling. A beautiful, vivacious Hufflepuff girl who hailed from Essex. The House of the Badger was often written off as uninspiring or even useless by some critics from other houses, but this particular Hufflepuff was someone he would never soon forget. Slim, curvy, with raven hair and hazel eyes, Elia had a personality to match- confident and self-assured but also playful and a tad mischievous which made her any boy’s match if they tried hitting on her. Felix had never tried himself, but by Merlin he wanted to and rather than embarrass himself with a cheesy pickup line, perhaps a poem would be able to better catch her attention.

Then there was the matter of her family- she was of mostly French and Turkish descent though she was English on her mother’s side, the fact was wizarding blood only went back two generations- two of her grandparents had been muggles. This made it that much harder to confess his feelings, his parents would certainly frown. He could already hear his older cousin, Evan admonishing him.

Intermarriage dilutes the magical blood, Felix. Even talking to one of those wretched creatures is an affront to everything we stand for.

Even with all this in mind, Felix had long decided not to pay much attention to his family’s pure blood prejudices. Elia was a witch that was indisputable, and a damn good one. He wasn’t going to let something so trivial get in the way of at least taking a shot. Besides, Evan had held onto that ideology with an iron fist and look where he ended up? Buried six feet under, killed by Mad-Eye Moody himself.

No, he wouldn’t let remnants of the Dark Lord’s memory bully him into deciding what he wanted, and that was Elia. The bigger question remained, however: how would he give her this poem?

“Alright, let me see…”

“Whatcha doin?”

The sound of a young girl’s voice made him jump almost ten feet in the air, spilling ink all over the desk.

“Merlin’s beard, Allison! Where do you get off sneaking up on people like that?”

“I don’t know,” the girl shrugged. “I was just bored and wanted to see what you were up to.”

Felix sighed. Allison Garrison had been nothing but a pain in his arse from the day she had arrived at Hogwarts. It was his first year being a prefect but the last he expected was for them to be so…blunt, or at least that was the case with Allison. She constantly talked back, caused mischief, and lost more house points from Professor Snape in one month than any other Slytherin in an entire year. His memory of his own time at age eleven was somewhat hazy but he was also quite certain that he had been able to keep his mouth shut for the most part.

This first year held no such ability.

“It’s just homework I have to do. Nothing that need concern you, Garrison.”

“It doesn’t look like homework.”

Good heavens, this girl just won’t let up.

“And how can you tell?”

“You keep crossing things out. Over and over again. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t take you that long to write a sentence for a Potions essay. And you’re mumbling constantly.”

Despite the negative attributes he associated with the first year Slytherin girl, Felix had to admit she could be quite clever and extraordinarily perceptive for someone her age. It was impressive and at times such as these, annoying.

“Whatever I’m doing, it’s still none of your business, Garrison. Now go.”

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with that Hufflepuff girl you’re always staring at-”

Felix cut her off with a temporary silence charm before lifting it.

“Must you always be a problem?”

“How’s it my problem you can’t tell a girl that you like her?” Allison responded sarcastically with a hint of a smirk. “Oh, I can picture it now. A snake and a badger together in never ending love. A snadger! Yeah, that’s what I’ll call it. Snadger!”

“Garrison, unless you want detention, I suggest you take your prattling somewhere else.”

That threat seemed to finally work as she had served a few already and would not enjoy another session pickling toad guts with Professor Snape. Nevertheless, she continued to taunt him as she left the room skipping and singing, “Snadger, Snadger, Snadger” all the way out of the common room.

“The little first year is going to give me an aneurysm someday,” Felix muttered to himself, attempting to return to his poem. With any luck, he could finish it before dinner and give it to Elia then.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Felix ran a hand through his hair as he entered the Great Hall, all abuzz with activity as it usually was. He knew Elia liked it that way, but he didn’t want to make it seem like he had done it on purpose. Better to be casually aloof and spontaneous than give away it was all part of a calculated plan.

Making his way over to the Hufflepuff table, he received some confused even hard stares from some of them. It was no secret that Slytherin was the least liked among the four houses and while the puffs were not quite as hostile as the Gryffindors, there was a clear stark contrast between ideologies: hard work versus ambition, fair play versus cunning, honesty versus doing whatever it took to win regardless of moral implications. Thankfully, Elia did not share such sentiments- they had been friends since first year after all, but trying to confess your feelings to girl was still nerve racking all the same.

He tried to calm himself, taking a deep breath through his nostrils.

Just ask for a moment of her time, which she’ll give you. Read her the poem, ask her to Hogsmeade and it’s over. Easy right?

Before he could debate further in his head, an odd sight made him stop in his tracks. A first year Slytherin girl that looked painfully familiar was already chatting away to Elia of all people. Feeling his stomach drop three feet, Felix rushed over as quickly as he could.

“Of all things…what on earth is she doing talking to Elia?” he muttered.

When he reached the scene, the horror reached new levels.

“Oh, hello, Felix,” Elia said, a hint of amusement in her voice. “I was just talking to one of your first years. She’s quite interesting you might say.”

“Interesting how?” Felix asked trying to keep his tone as light as possible.

“Oh, I told her everything,” Allison boasted but with a dangerous twinkle in her eye. “I told her you’re my prefect of course, how you keep trying to get me to stay out of trouble, the incident with Devil’s Snare, Merula, even giving me detention. She told me that you guys have been friends for over five years now.”

“That is true,” he replied tersely. Elia seemed like she was trying not to laugh but this was not unfolding the way he wanted it to. The mischievous look on Garrison’s face only spelled further trouble.

“So why haven’t you told her, yet? You know? About the po-mmhmhmmmff”

It was then that Felix’s patience ran out as he covered Allison’s mouth with his hand and spun her away from the Hufflepuff table.

“Very nice to see you, Elia,” he said forcing a smile that was more like a grimace. “But I do believe we must be going.”

He began leading Allison away but the Hufflepuff girl stopped him.

“Felix, it’s okay, let her go. I’d like to speak with you in private.”

Such a calm, reassuring tone from Elia, who rarely turned down an opportunity to tease him, helped deescalate the situation. He released Elia, but not before she licked his hand with her tongue.

“Ack! I’m not finished with you, Garrison. Stay here until I return.”

“Whatever you say,” Allison responded in that same sing-song tone. “Have fun, snadgers!”

Felix had to be practically led away from the Great Hall from the eyes of other prying Hufflepuffs, still mortified from Allison’s meddling.

She knows. She knows that I like her and she’s going to let me down easy. All because that stupid first year couldn’t shut her mouth for two seconds.

Upon exiting, Felix heaved a heavy sigh, figuring it was best to rip the bandage off quickly before the inevitable rejection came.

“Elia, I’m sorry about her,” he said. “I wanted to tell you myself, but she beat me to it, I guess.”

“Felix, you don’t need to apologize,” the Hufflepuff soothed him and then her infamous grin spread across her face like a Cheshire cat. “The truth is, I’ve known for some time.”

“Wait…you were already aware of how I felt?”

“Boys are hardly subtle,” Elia laughed. “Even a Slytherin such as yourself. I’ve caught you staring more than a few times.”

“So, why not say anything?”

“Well for one, listening to Allison jabber on like that was kind of cute.”

Felix couldn’t prevent the pink from spreading across his face.

“She’s getting detention for the rest of the year,” he muttered.

Elia placed a soft, feminine hand over his cheek, turning it to face her. This caused him to go from pink all the way to beet red.

“Felix, don’t punish her. She wasn’t trying to embarrass you; it was actually quite sweet. Nothing she told me was anything I didn’t know already. But she put in a good word for you, saying how you were a great prefect and how you wanted to ask me out with a poem. She thinks the world of you.”

He crumpled the piece of paper in his robe pocket.

“She does, eh?”

“Yes. And I don’t need a poem and an elaborate ritual to be convinced to go out with you,” she teased. “I’ll gladly go to Hogsmeade with you next weekend. Meet me in the courtyard at two o’clock.”

And then, without warning, Elia kissed him on the cheek and winked at him as she walked back into the Great Hall to rejoin the other Hufflepuffs.

Touching the spot where he had received the kiss, Felix proceeded to shuffle back towards the Slytherin table in a bit of a daze, wondering if he had actually just scored a date with the girl of his dreams until a loud, familiar voice snapped him back to reality.

“Felix?”

The Slytherin prefect looked down and saw the little eleven year old girl staring up at him. Functionality returned to his brain, remembering that he had instructed Allison to remain in the Great Hall until he returned.

“You told me to stay here. What’s my punishment?”

Looking into the eyes of the precocious first year, Felix knew she had tried to play matchmaker on purpose and true to Slytherin form, used her own brand of cunning to do it. But more so than that, he also knew that Allison also genuinely tried to make him look good as well, appealing to Elia’s heart and sensibility. The newfound revelation that this first year not only tried to help but liked him was touching.

“You’re off the hook this time, Garrison. Enjoy your dinner.”

Allison mocked fake surprised, but the twinkle in her eyes gave her away.

“Wow! Thanks, Felix! You really are the best prefect ever.”

Giving him a big hug, she skipped away to her friend Rowan but before sitting down, she added, “Enjoy your snadger date! Snadger, snadger, snadger…”

Felix rolled his eyes but allowed a slight smile to cross his face.

He knew this would not be the first nor the last time Allison Garrison caused him trouble.

[yourkeeperoftherunners]

maybe i sent too much? lol just do as many as you'd like to!💗💕💞

You didn’t send too much! I appreciate you sending them!

Here are my answers below:

What are your favourite albums from each of the groups you mentioned?

BLACKPINK – SQUARE TWO (Ironically it also contains my favorite song “Playing with Fire” from the group.)

BTS – The Most Beautiful Moment in Life: Young Forever (My first song with them was “Fire” and it’s still my favorite song for the lyrics and melody.)

EXO – The Power of Music (The group had a lot of fun with the video and I really liked their b-side “Boomerang” too.)

ITZY – IT’Z ICY (Another one where my first and favorite track from them is on this EP.)

Stray Kids – I am WHO (This was a hard pick between this one and I am YOU which has the same name for the title track. The latter was my first song I heard from them but “My Pace” holds a special place in my heart for the meaning and the memory of Changbin asking the KCON audience to help him with the beginning part.)

What are your favourite songs?

BLACKPINK – “Playing with Fire” and “Hope Not”

BTS – “Fire”, “Trivia: Seesaw”, “MIC DROP (Steve Aoki Remix)”, and two songs off RM’s second mixtape “Seoul” and “Tokyo”

EXO – “Lightsaber”, “Boomerang”, and “Power”

ITZY – “ICY”, “Wannabe”, and “I Don’t Wanna Dance”

Stray Kids – I like a good chunk of their repertoire so it’s difficult to narrow it down. “My Pace” and “I am You” are ones I hold close. “Mirroh”, “Road Not Taken”, “STOP”, “Blueprint”, “God’s Menu”, and “Slump” have been on replay for me as of lately.

Do you have a favourite moment of theirs?

BLACKPINK – They did a short reality show called BLACKPINK HOUSE and one of the early episodes showed Lisa and Rosé waking early to make breakfast for the older girls. Rosé found bread and made toast, only she burned the first two slices and tried to save it by scraping off the burned areas. She proceeded to try her handiwork and did this cute arm flapping thing to show how proud she was of her work.

BTS – They do a series called Run! BTS and two episodes were split over them doing games themed to old Korean variety shows that were on when they were very young kids. They had these really dated looking outfits on and at one point they had to play a game where they listen to a children’s song, take a nap for 20-30 minutes, then wake up and try to remember the full song lyrics without any guidance. Some of them got hung up on words and poor Suga, who was the referee, was trying to find ways to give them hints without spoiling the answers.

EXO – Their appearances on Ask Us Anything/Knowing Bros. There was one where they played a game themed to their concept superpowers and a few of them actually were terrible at their jobs. (Ex. Xiumin’s assigned power is ice so he had to fish beans out of a bucket of ice in the game – he struggled because it was very cold, so another member did his job. Sehun’s assigned power is wind and he struggled to keep a piece of paper floating in the air with his breath only, etc.)

ITZY – At KCON LA, they introduced themselves after performing their latest single “ICY” and did a cute showcase of their talents.

Stray Kids – When they were on Weekly Idol, they played a game where they had to appeal to I.N., their maknae, to rank them from 1-8 in terms of his favorite hyung. The other members did things like bribe him with new sneakers, making up raps on the spot, and the dancers tried dancing to impress I.N. plus threw in some extras. (Hyunjin gave I.N. a ring, Lee Know tried dancing sexy until Hyunjin shoved him off I.N. for being inappropriate, and Felix offered I.N. a piggyback ride.)

Favourite outfit?

I really like Rosé’s grey sweater/checkerboard skirt/black thigh high boots look from “As if it’s Your Last”. That skirt inspired me to make my own skirt.

I like some of RM’s pieces from VISVIM because the head designer does pay a lot of attention to the process and details in his clothing pieces and it shows.

Most of the stuff I like for EXO is Chanyeol’s personal style – he wears a lot of VETEMENTS but maybe his “Freal Luv” look from the Far East Movement MV?

There’s a stage outfit Lia has worn where it’s this black sleeveless dress with buttons down the front and it’s cute and classy. The buttons kind of remind me of marching band jackets a little.

I did love the styling for KCON LA – albeit I still laugh about my friends asking me who the hot guy in all black with the abs (Bang Chan) and the cute guy in the red/black striped jacket (Han) after the concert.

If you could only stan one group for the rest of your life, which group would it be?

Stray Kids and I think it has to do with the fact that I’ve seen them twice in concert and always have a lot of fun when they perform.

Which 3 idols from those groups would you rather be stranded on a deserted island with?

Rosé (BLACKPINK)

Bang Chan (Stray Kids)

? I’m not sure who I want as my third pick. Felix is the other half of the Aussie line from Stray Kids, but it’s tempting to consider someone like Jungkook from BTS since he’s one of those “happens to be good at almost everything” people and that would come in handy for survival. While RM is my favorite in BTS, please protect Mr. Danger Prone – he’s clumsy and I’d be more concerned about the injuries he’d end up with.

[archer3-13]

In the interest of stupidity: Dimitri and Hubert AU

How does this comes about: Edelgard doesn't survive the experiments and one of her other siblings, supposing they actually do exist, survives instead. Hubert, devastated upon finding out, flees to the kingdom having heard that Edelgards mother is there and believing that he can convince her to get in on whatever crazy scheme hes trying to cook up. However, he arrives to late due to a variety of circumstances and Patrica is gone and the tragedy of Duscurs just happened. undeterred, he comes to learn that edelgards brother in law, the crown prince of faerghus, has survived. Cue evil laughter on Huberts part because this is Hubert. 

What happens next: Hubert works his way into the princes, and by extension Dedue’s, good graces all the while planting the seeds he needs to convince Dimitri to go on a murder vengeance spree of imperial Nobility and the Agatharians, which incidentally makes the metaphorical ghosts haunting Dimitri even worse. Especially when Hubert plants the idea that Edelgard was murdered by the same people who instigated the tragedy.

The academy: so the academy rolls around and all of Dimitris childhood friends are rather confused when he drags along not only the man of Duscur Dedue to the academy, but also some pale ass vampire mother fucker to the academy as well who keeps laughing evily in dark corners and carries razor blades and chloroform. Still, like in cannon most of them try to make it work. Aside from Felix who tries to make it not work as usual. regardless the academy rolls around and dimitri meets edelgards sibling, one who for the sake of this au is also related to aurendel, and tries to strike up a friendship with them because the boy just wants family and to be happy. cue reveal of the flame emperor, and cue dimitri snapping. hard. Hubert realizes he might have fucked up on this one when Dimitri starts openly begging a dead Edelgard only he seems to be aware of for forgiveness for not taking vengeance sooner.

Timeskip: so things dont exactly go well for Hubert at this point, hes quickly identified as the missing vestra heir, directly blamed for assassinating the faerghus regent on dimitris orders, and cornelia instigates a manhunt against him. Hubert ends up taking refuge in his fathers estate of all places before being forced to flee again as his father his arrested for treason against the imperial throne on incredibly flimsy evidence. Faking his death he manages to hide right under cornelias nose in fhirdiad, following whatever rumors he can about dimitris location. He stays there until the reunion at garreg mach when gilbert gets in touch with him about the princes whereabouts.

Post Timeskip: so the reunion happens, no ones particularly happy with him as they all somewhat blame him for Dimitris crazed state of mind for various reasons. Ironically its only felix who dont particularly blame him, and dedue when he shows up later though mostly because they recognize that the madness was always there even if hubert didnt help it. mercedes is also kinder to him then others because shes mercedes and she just does that kinda stuff. Hubert himself does feel a bit guilty, he may be trying to manipulate dimitri since day one but dimitris tendency to try and reach out and be equals with those around him as opposed to expecting their loyalty is hard to simply ignore. Still, he tries to keep his eyes on the prize and pushes for dimitris murder quest the hardest well secretly trying to contain the fallout of dimitris impulsive decisions. Then the battle at Grondor happens, rodrigue is killed, and dimitri suddenly seems to snap out of it. Dimitri apologizes and insists on a march to fhirdiad, hubert accepts having reallized they were basically fucked if they tried to push onto enbar in this state. Dimitri and Hubert sit down and have a proper conversation about their relation to each other, and well dimitri isnt happy about the manipulation he still appreciates the help huberts given him over the years and insists that his own dangerous state of mind was inevitable. Hubert of all people still apologizes and they become proper friends even if hubert still carries razor blades and chloroform. Hubert straightens out his relations to the other Blue lions as well, and gathers info on the agatharians and helps expose them and find the truth of the massacre. The agatharians and adrestia goes down, history remembers him as the reincarnation of panne or whoever loogs tactician was named albeit one who was consistently shady over his entire life. bim bam done.

[juniperwindsong]

Dragonology 101 (4/10)

Summary: 

"Blimey...this is you just liking something? I hate to imagine what you'd be like with something you actually love."

If Felix Rosier, age sixteen, strict Slytherin prefect and manically dedicated 6th year student, had been told that one year in the future he would be spending nearly a third of each week sneaking out of school to visit a dragon in the dead of night, he would have docked points from whatever student was making up such a slanderous lie. And yet now he can be found, by those who bother to look, kipping in the back of classes, shirking prefect duties as often as he can get away with it, and nicking dead animals from the Care of Magical Creatures paddock whenever Kettleburn is not around.

Felix has no idea where this rebellious streak originated. True, he has never been afraid to bend or even break the rules on occasion in order to keep Slytherin the top house. He's jinxed other students, dueled outside classes, and lied to professors, but he has always justified his actions as necessary for the greater good of his house. Reckless rule breaking that does not further Slytherin's reputation or chances of winning the house cup, Felix considers selfish, a betrayal of their fraternity. He has never even broken curfew before, or sneaked down to the kitchens to steal food, let alone thrown nearly half the school rules out the window just to feed a dragon with Jacob Windsong's little sister.

Maybe she's been a bad influence, Felix thinks to himself one Transfiguration lesson after failing to answer Professor McGonagall's question for the second time. A year ago, he would have been livid with himself, but vanishing cauldrons seems so trivial now next to the very real presence that is the growing dragon. Felix is changing, he knows, his iron-clad discipline creaking under the strain of his newly discovered passion, and nights when he's not escaping to the forest it takes all his efforts to keep his mind on his studies.

Yes, it would be easy to blame the 13 year old curse-breaker, who has never met a rule she doesn't think herself above, but Felix knows that's not entirely true. Her influence and the dragon may have set it free, but this desire to do something - dangerous, physical, and just for himself - has always been there. He's just kept it hidden for so long he's forgotten.

-

They are halfway through October, and whether Felix or Juniper is better with the dragon is hard to say. Most of their evenings in the forest find Juniper at the dragon's head, feeding it treats and keeping it calm, while Felix circles its body, inspecting it from every angle. It is Felix who determines the dragon's sex.

"Male," he announces on his first perambulation.

"Well then, good boy, Sparky!" crows Juniper, stroking the back of the dragon's scaly head.

"It's still Sparky, then?" he asks bemusedly making his way steadily back around to her.

"Sure. Sparky can be a girl's or a boy's name."

"It isn't a name at all," insists Felix doggedly, but her only response is a merry laugh.

Felix also has better luck examining the dragon's (he refuses to think of it, him, as Sparky) injured wing. With Juniper holding its head and speaking softly, all while plying it with rabbits which it consumes in ever-increasing amounts, Felix manages to crouch down beside the dragon and inspect its injury.

A long gash has torn through the bottom panel of its left wing. Each side of the now parted wing has begun to heal up on its own; ugly, uneven scars forming on the torn edges. Felix is no expert, but as far as he can tell, through the absence of any pus or smell of rot, the wound is not infected. Still, the dragon seems to find the area tender, jerking involuntarily whenever Felix strokes his fingers feather-light across the developing scars, and it has still made no effort to fly away.

Felix begins to use the time not spent with the dragon to bury himself in the library researching wound care, healing spells, anything he thinks will help him discover a way to fix his dragon's wing. So single-minded has Felix become, that Juniper finds herself confronting him about the state of his schoolwork one afternoon in the library. She announces her presence by slamming a large book down on the table beside him in the corner where he has sequestered himself, earning a scandalized shush from Madam Pince shelving books a few rows over.

Felix looks up, startled, forcing his mind out of the book he's skimming on the potential use of Reparo on organic matter (the outlook not promising) and trying to focus his vision on the girl in front of him.

"What are you doing here?" he hisses, though his voice is too hoarse from disuse for it to contain any real venom. "Shouldn't you be in class?"

"It's dinner," Juniper says, holding up her pocket watch as evidence.

"Oh," is all Felix can manage. He's a little disconcerted by the time, not realizing he has been in the library for hours. He looks back down at his book, put out, as he always is, at being interrupted while intent on reading. "Why aren't you in the Great Hall then?"

"Chester Davies is looking for you. He cornered a couple of first-years outside the common room demanding to see you."

"What?" Felix jerks his head back up abruptly. "Why?"

"Apparently," explains Juniper perching herself on top of the table, her back to the bookshelf so she can look directly at him, "you've missed your last two transfiguration revision sessions with the other prefects? Davies was worried we had you tied up or something."

She delivers this last as a joke, but Felix misses the humour entirely.

"I've been researching alternative methods of repairing the wing."

Juniper glances down at the books Felix has spread across the table, then cranes her neck around to read from the pages open in front of him.

"Reparo? You can't use that on animals, can you? And even if you could, I doubt the two of us casting it together would be enough for it to work on a dragon. You said yourself, dragon hide-"

"Yes, and you said yourself it's juvenile and more susceptible to magic," Felix argues, his bad temper rising. "Besides, I'm mainly researching the theory. To see if the spell can be modified."

"Wow," Juniper says, eyes widening, "that's... an impressive undertaking." But she looks more concerned than impressed. "And is this in addition to your regular school work or in place of?"

"What?" Felix snaps, itching to return to his book.

"It's just that..." Juniper swings her legs back and forth underneath the table nervously, "Davies mentioned you hadn't turned in your last transfiguration assignment which is really unusual for you so I just wondered -"

"Are you really going to try to lecture me about focusing on my schoolwork?" Felix's voice is waspish.

"I'm not lecturing, I'm inquiring," she answers carefully.

"Well, thank you for your inquiry, but I'm managing my workload just fine," Felix counters, staring pointedly back at his book to indicate the end of the conversation.

"Really?" questions Juniper, undaunted. "Would you consider that I, or anyone else in Slytherin, was 'managing just fine' if we were skipping our actual assignments to pursue personal projects?"

In spite of himself, Felix lifts his head again to glower at her, "Isn't that all you ever do?"

"Of course not! " Juniper retorts, looking slightly hurt.

"In fact, doesn't this all sound a little familiar to you? Have I not had this exact conversation with you at least once every term since you got here?"

Juniper's face is turning pink and she can't meet his eyes, "Not exactly, you yell a lot more than I-"

"And has it ever had even the slightest effect on your behavior? Because as far as I can tell it's all been wasted breath." Felix delivers his tirade in a furious hiss, quiet enough to escape the notice of Madam Pince, but Juniper leans further away with each word as though he were screaming at her. "So, one might conclude it's just a bit hypocritical of you to berate me for missing a single assignment when I know for a fact Professor Snape has banned you from Hogsmeade until you've brought up your marks!"

Juniper's face has turned a bright Gryffindor red, and she drops her head quickly hiding behind her long hair.

Felix stops, breathing heavily. He feels angry and agitated, and has half a mind to go on raging at her a bit more just to alleviate some of his tension. Before he can decide what to say, however, Juniper jerks her head up to look directly at him. Her cheeks are still burning, but her eyes are very clear and her mouth is set in that determined line Felix knows too well.

"You're wrong, you know. What you say does affect me." Juniper's voice comes out rough with suppressed emotion. She stops and takes a deep breath before continuing.

"I know you dog me about schoolwork because...well...you care. About everyone in Slytherin. In your way," Juniper adds hastily at the scandalized look on Felix's face. "You do, you know you do. You wouldn't waste your breath on us like that if you didn't. And I know it might not always come across because, well, I can't just give up on searching for my brother. But you've always inspired me to do better, for myself and for Slytherin."

Juniper looks down at the table where her fingernails trace random patterns in the wood.

"You know," she continues, haltingly, "when I first came to school, I honestly didn't expect to make it through the year. I figured I'd be expelled or killed or something. But none of that mattered... because finding my brother was the only thing that mattered. And you...you played a big part in making me realize that, well... there are other things that are important too. And I need to try and balance them, and not focus on my search for Jacob to the detriment of everything else."

Juniper says this last bit very quickly and somehow too easily, as though it's a line she's memorised, repeated to herself over and over.

Felix's anger flags as he takes in this rather alarming confession. He doesn't know whether he feels more touched that she appreciates his nagging, or outraged at the insinuation that their situations are in anyway comparable. He isn't obsessing about the dragon the way she obsesses about her brother. He's merely focused; the same way he is on any assignment.

Felix's ability to dedicate all of his attention to the task at hand has always benefited him, allowed him to master spells twice as quickly as his peers. True, it is taking him longer than he expected in this instance. And, in order to put in the time necessary to succeed with the dragon, he has had to back-burner other things sometimes...the occasional study session, or homework assignment, or... History of Magic class...

Felix surveys the table in front of him as if seeing it for the first time. Precarious piles of books and scattered parchment notes litter his usually well organized work space. He notices his stomach rumbling and casts his mind back for the last time he's eaten a meal but can't remember. He's sure he must have had breakfast this morning...or dinner last night, at least? His head aches as well, just over his left eye.

Felix thinks back over his actions of the past few weeks and winces. Windsong is right. He's been as wrapped up in the dragon as she has been in finding her brother, and the thought makes him blanch. Caught up in his unexpected adventure, Felix has put out of his mind entirely the future waiting for him at the end of this year. The thought of all his responsibilities, duties, and expectations floods over him all at once, leaving him feeling slightly sick. How could he have risked his entire reputation for this?

"You might have a point," says Felix abruptly. He stands up and begins to gather his things.

Juniper slides off the table in alarm at Felix's sudden movement. His unexpected concession renders her momentarily speechless, a surprising state of affairs for her.

"Oh...um...really?" she manages.

"Yes." Felix glances at her, and it's the sly, superior expression his face is most accustomed to. "It's obvious we're not going to be able to fix this injury. All this," he nods at the books he's currently stacking up " it's just been a waste of time, really. And I do have other things that require my attention."

"That's not- I didn't mean- you don't have to-" Juniper stutters, apparently caught off guard by his rapid change in demeanor. Her voice trails away as she watches Felix's brisk movements.

Felix is determined not to look at her as he carefully places his notes, quill, and ink back into his bag. He wishes bitterly that she'd hidden all this better from him, that he had never seen a dragon, never discovered what it was like to do something dangerous and wild and free...it had been so much easier to live before he knew what he was living without.

Felix squeezes his eyes shut and runs a hand over his hair, smoothing it flat unconsciously. How can he go back to that - long nights spent reading and revising - when he knows there's a dragon out there, waiting for him? This was always temporary, he knows that; adventures don't last forever. But he isn't ready for it to be over...not yet...

Juniper's hand comes to rest on his forearm and Felix's eyes open automatically. Somehow, he sees her hand before he can feel it: long, delicate fingers, with short, slightly dirty nails. What look like slender pink burns peek around the sides of her fingers, and Felix wonders why they couldn't have been healed by magic. Neither of them move. Felix hears Juniper swallow hard before she speaks.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean that I thought you were doing the wrong thing. It's...really cool the way you care so much about helping Sparky."

She squeezes his arm, very lightly; the pressure encouraging rather than threatening.

"Maybe we can take some of these with us," Juniper inclines her head at the books, "you know, do some research while we're with him? I used to sit and study when I was helping Hagrid with the Thestral. Helped get him accustomed to company while I got a bit of work done as well. What do you think?"

Felix raises his eyes to find Juniper peering at him anxiously, and he feels a sudden shame at berating her so harshly.

She's just trying to help, he realises, it's what she does. Hagrid, himself, the dragon, her brother...she helps people, even when they don't want it, even when it's dangerous. And she's too young or too stubborn to think about the consequences to herself if she doesn't succeed. It's going to get her killed, thinks Felix. So really... really it's his duty to keep going with her, to keep her safe. Isn't it?

It's a weak excuse. But any excuse is all Felix needs right now. The thought that his adventure isn't over, that he will see the dragon again, settles the queasiness in his stomach.

Felix gives Juniper a small smile in an attempt to appease her. "That's not a bad idea, Windsong. Good time management. Here." He grabs the topmost book from a pile without looking at it and hands it to her.

Juniper takes the book cautiously, still looking uncertain, "So... we're okay?"

The smile reaches his eyes now. "Yes, Windsong, we're okay."

"Okay,” says Juniper, matching his smile with one slightly less enthusiastic than is her norm. "I'll see you tomorrow evening then."

She takes a step back.

"Tomorrow evening," Felix agrees with a nod.

Juniper turns, walking halfway down the aisle before doubling back and saying, "Oh, and do make sure and tell Davies you're alive before he and the other prefects mount a siege on the common room."

She flashes her signature lop-sided grin before hurrying away again.

-

"Can I ask you a question?" Juniper asks Felix the following evening. Their backs propped against the earthen wall of the ravine, they sit on a green and silver checked cloth Felix has conjured (to inexplicable giggles from Juniper) while she flips through the book from the library.

Felix watches Sparky trot away from them toward a sad little pool, hardly more than a deep puddle, at the other end of the valley. Seeing the dragon walk is something that has not yet ceased to give Felix a small thrill; the powerful muscles in its legs rippling as it moves so carefully and precisely, its wings stretched just enough to provide it a graceful balance. He can't imagine what it must be like to watch it fly.

Thus distracted, Felix answers "Yes," without thinking.

"What is it with you and dragons?"

Felix glances over to find Juniper staring at him, her head cocked to the side and propped up on one hand.

"What do you mean?" he replies, self-consciously. The way she stares at him reminds him of the way his mother looks at paintings in museums. Felix finds it discomfiting.

"You know what I mean." Juniper lifts her head off her hand. "You wouldn't be out here if Sparky were, say, an Abraxan, would you?"

It's a rhetorical question, and she doesn't wait for an answer. "When you agreed to let me sneak out of the common room that first night, I assumed you must have some secret motive, like wanting powdered dragon claw or something. But it was really just because you wanted to see a dragon, wasn't it?"

Felix doesn't respond to this, turning instead to watch Sparky drink from the little pool. It's strewn with leaves from the trees that overhang the sides of the ravine, and he notices the dragon makes a point of fastidiously avoiding them as it laps up water with its strangely narrow tongue.

"So..." Juniper persists, "What is it about dragons that makes you hang the rule book and skive off school work?"

Felix shrugs, studiously not looking at her. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" she repeats skeptically.

He sighs. "They're... interesting."

"Interesting?" Juniper repeats him again, and Felix makes an exasperated noise.

"What do you want me to say? There isn't any particular reason! I just-"

Sounds of splashing cause them both to glance over at Sparky. The dragon is now using a foreleg to smack the leaves floating in the pool. One soggy leaf catches on the dragon's claw, and it lifts it out of the water and shakes it vigorously.

Felix cannot stop himself. He smiles fondly at it and murmurs, "I've always liked dragons."

"Blimey," says Juniper, watching Felix again instead of Sparky. "This is you just liking something? I hate to imagine what you'd be like with something you actually love." She turns back to the book, shaking her head, a smile playing at her lips.

Felix tears his gaze from Sparky as the dragon trots back over to settle in the grass. Juniper returns to absently thumbing through pages , and Felix watches her debating whether or not to broach the subject he's burning to discuss. It's dangerous, he knows. It's a clear violation of their unspoken agreement to keep conversation about the dragon and not each other. But, Felix supposes, she's the one who made it personal first. He takes a deep breath.

"May I ask you a question?"

Juniper looks up from the book. " 'Course."

Felix takes the time to meet her eyes before saying, "Why is it so important to find out what happened to your brother?"

It's as though a light has turned off behind her eyes. Her face becomes entirely blank. She says nothing.

Felix is expecting this however, and presses on. He knows it's impertinent and not really any of his business. But after their confrontation in the library, he feels compelled to say what he's thinking.

"Look, by all accounts, Jacob was into everything he shouldn't have been: the cursed vaults, the dark arts. He was expelled for heaven's sake and you... you say you're looking for him, but you're really just following in his footsteps. And it's just made everything harder for you, hasn't it? Do you think that's what he would have wanted for you? To make his same mistakes? Rather than putting the past behind you and making a name for yourself? One that's about you and your talent and not about him?"

Juniper continues to stare at Felix, but now it's with something like pity.

"You don't have siblings, do you."

It's a statement, not a question.

"No," Felix confirms.

Juniper is quiet for a few more seconds.

"How about a best friend?"

Felix considers this. He thinks briefly of Evan, his closest cousin, who spent summer holidays with him teaching him rare curses and occasionally trying them out on him. He thinks of the other prefects that he spends time with during revision sessions and patrol duties. And of the Slytherin boys from his year, most of whom he talks to fairly regularly and some of whom can be counted on for a favor provided the cost to them isn't too high. But a best friend? Felix isn't even sure what that would entail.

"I don't...know," he finally says, hesitantly.

Juniper's smile is forced and somehow sad. "Then I don't know that I can explain."

She drops her gaze to where her fingers are absently drawing circles in the dirt beside the book.

Juniper's words rankle Felix. While he's used to accepting such pronouncements from his parents and professors, he has never taken well to being told he can't do something or know something by other students, especially ones younger than himself .

As if having "best friends" gives you access to some secret knowledge other people aren't qualified to understand, Felix thinks hotly.

"Try me," he challenges.

Juniper starts, clearly shocked at his combativeness. Her mouth opens and her eyes flash and Felix is sure she's about to snap something at him. But at the last second Juniper stops and sighs deeply, the fight gone out of her all in an instant. To Felix's surprise, she begins to speak.

"Jacob was my brother and my best friend." Juniper begins in a fast, flat sort of voice, as if she's reading from a book she's not particularly interested in. "Which is silly, he's ten years older than I am but..."

She pauses, eyes closed, collecting her thoughts. "My parents, they're older and they were always working, and they just didn't have time for a little kid. I had a house elf that took care of me and gave me lessons but I didn't really have any friends. We don't live near any other wizarding families and none of my parents' friends have children my age. So Jacob was really my only friend growing up."

Juniper can't help but smile as she speaks of her brother. "And he always treated me like I was his friend, not a kid sister. Over the holidays he spent nearly all his time with me, making up adventures for us to go on or just talking. Letting me ramble on about my life at home like I had anything worth saying." She rolls her eyes self-deprecatingly at this. "And he never made me feel stupid or like I was too young to have thoughts or feelings. And when he was at school he wrote to me, all the time, no matter how busy he was. He would tell me everything that happened to him, make me feel like...like he valued my opinion."

Juniper sighs again. "Of course, I know now it was mostly all lies, what he wrote. He never told me anything about cursed vaults or the dark arts or anything that would have got him expelled. I guess I didn't really know him at all."

She admits this last in a small voice and trails off, gazing at Sparky.

"But I do know," Juniper adds, looking back to Felix, her voice gathering strength again, "that if it were me that were lost, Jacob would never stop looking. Ever. No matter what it cost him."

Her eyes boring into his are as fierce as the dragon's and Felix is at a loss for what to say.

-

That night in bed, Felix mentally compiles a list of the people he's closest to, anyone that might be conceivably classified as a friend, and tries to decide if there's anyone he'd go to so much trouble to find if they went missing. No one name sticks out readily.

Felix considers his parents: his mother? Surely if his mother went missing he would look for her. No, he concludes, most likely his father would forbid him from taking any action, certainly any action that would harm the family's reputation. His father would look for her though, wouldn't he? Or hire someone to look for her? For some reason, the thought makes Felix uncomfortable.

Then he wonders if his parents would come looking for him if he disappeared.

Felix considers potential scenarios. Maybe if he were kidnapped or vanished without a trace one morning with no warning. They would certainly make an attempt to find him then; it would be a shame on the family not to. But... if he went poking around something he wasn't supposed to, was in trouble with the law, then finally disappeared in disgrace?

They would disavow me, Felix thinks brutally, strike me from the family tree, refuse to speak my name, pretend I never existed.

The knowledge leaves him cold, and Felix suddenly feels all alone in a castle of hundreds of students and teachers. None of them would miss him if he were to disappear, he realizes miserably, not really miss him. Not enough to find him. They would wonder about him for a little while, then forget him entirely.

Felix feels a sudden surge of jealousy toward Jacob Windsong. To have someone be so devoted to you they would stop at nothing, risk their whole life, future, reputation just for the slightest chance to have you back...

I want that, Felix admits to himself. But it's not a particularly comforting revelation, and he drifts off to sleep feeling lonely and morose.

-

Chapter 5 | Masterpost