#it goes so hard ive got it on a loop

[dont-be-late-to-the-dance]

guys I am so close to giving rockstar/actor!Luis a homewrecker subplot someone tell me to stop I need to be talked down from the ledge

[awrkive]

PLEASE LET CNBL COUPLE HAVE THEIR SEXTAPE 🤤 i think oc would be down to that idea but i get why jungkook is taking things slow too but my man is a simp fr he would put it in a loop because he’s obsessed with his girlfriend

i got u anon. ive got an ask about it sometime ago abt what miss cnbl!oc feels about digital s*x or film s*x. thought of an idea. this is 2 years after wncl, which is sorta kinda like the sequel of cnbl lols. anyways this is kinda self indulgent and honestly just an excuse to write smut 😭

summary: jungkook can't bear being away from you, and so you give him a solution

w/c: 2k lol

warning/s: consensual filming, unprotected s*x, cre*mpies

Jungkook can get pretty intense during reunions. In fact, intense is an understatement. He absolutely goes fervent, and you can’t blame him when you missed him just as bad too. 

“Ngh– fuck, I miss you so much, baby. I miss you every fucking day,” he groans into your ear, pumping his cock in and out of you at that pace that’s just so right. Not too fast. Not too slow. Just enough to make you keen; to make you grip the sheets behind you so tight. Just enough to not make it hurt when you've already come two times from his mouth and tongue, and another two times from his dick. Consequently, he's already two creampies inside your pussy and it's not even been a full hour.

And just when you thought that he’d be satisfied by the last time, he’s now determined on coaxing a fifth release from you. 

Frankly, you don’t know if you can do it. Sure, there was one time last year when he made you cum seven times in a row – and Jungkook still talks about it like a kid high on sugar, mentions it every now and then, keeps on wanting to do it again sometime – but it’s too bad you can’t keep up with him all of the time. Jungkook’s stamina is high and yours isn’t all that exemplary.

But you do try your best to match it because you love it just as well. You love the feeling of his cum shooting inside your hole, him pushing it back into you in that non-overbearing possessive manner, and how he always tells you you’re such a good girl for taking more and more, just letting him give and give. 

It’s why you encourage him to get you to cum again – because god, you really also missed him so fucking bad. 

He just got back from LA, just arrived at your place five hours ago, and you expected him to sleep the whole night in – not when you know he worked so hard back there. His team just bagged a win, and they’re moving onto semis the next few weeks. 

But Jungkook informed you that he had to leave again in six days – had to train across oceans again with the team. Said that he just begged his coach to get him a one-week vacay when others only got four. 

It’s not unfair when he’s the star player of the team he’s been winning for in the entirety of the last year. Jungkook’s an NBA player who has gained much bigger success and popularity ever since he got drafted, despite being so young and fresh to the scene. 

And sure, he basks in it sometimes – likes the praise, likes the way winning makes him feel. He loves playing for the team. Loves the work that he does. 

But one thing he absolutely fucking loathes about it is that he has to fly off across states for a game, and that means leaving the comfort of your shared apartment – leaving you, not being with you. 

And so you understand greatly why he’s intense during reunions. Because as much as you’re happy with your current lawyering – in your second year now – you also miss those days back in college when you could just have each other every single day. 

“Yes, fuck– oh there, baby, that feels so good…” you moan when he hits a particular spot. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he encloses his hot mouth around your nipple again, alternating on suckling and nipping around it, his other hand fondling your other boob. But again, Jungkook seems to be so on edge right now that you let out an “Ow!” at one harsh bite. 

“Sorry,” Jungkook soothes it with a kiss to the tip, hips still moving against yours, cock going at a steady pace in and out of your pussy. “I just missed you so much, pretty girl. Those calls weren’t enough.” He whispers against your chest, this time lapping at your breasts more gently. 

You reach out for the messy locks that sit atop his head, smiling gently down at him even though he can’t see you. 

“Babe?” 

“Hm?”

“Do you want to take a video?” You ask, still caressing his hair. 

You don’t expect the way his hips stutter after your question. The quickness in which he peels his head away from your tits to look at you with a surprised face after that is almost laughable but that would be mean of you.

“What?” 

“A video. Of us. I dunno… maybe it will do us both good if we have something of us while we’re away from each other.” you shrug nonchalantly. 

You both aren’t strangers to sending nudes to each other or sexting in general. Jungkook sends you videos and pictures of his dick a lot of times – unprovoked and even on a random Tuesday at 2 fucking pm. And you send him your tits and risky pictures of you in crotchless panties when you feel like it. (Like when you’re taking a bath and you're feeling a bit raunchy with the soap suds all over your breasts… Jungkook gets so drunk off the pictures that he fucks you so good once he gets ahold of you in person.)

It used to be just tits but you’ve upgraded to pussy pics… hey, it’s just that you’ve grown more comfortable overtime.

Being with Jungkook for three years now, you can say that you’ve tried a lot of things with sex. But somehow… you’ve never really tried making a sex tape. 

Sure, Jungkook’s brought it up before. Asked you if you were interested in the idea – but you answerwd with an affirmative no. Photos were okay, but videos were off-limits, and Jungkook was completely fine with that. It is your body, and he understands thoroughly the anxiety that you have behind the idea of sexual digital footprint – you’re a woman after all, there’s ultimately danger as a consequence to the very idea. 

It’s not even Jungkook you don’t trust. God, you trust him so much – but it’s this paranoia about imaginary people who are out to get you. 

And so that has always held you back. 

But right now, as you feel Jungkook’s frustration about the long distance thing as much as his love while he drives you up the headboard with his loving, passionate thrusts, you can’t help but think that maybe you can give this a try. 

Filming a sextape, you meant. 

“Are you sure?” Jungkook blinks up at you, eyes wide as it opens and blinks continuously. 

You chuckle. “Yes. Why do you look so surprised?”

Jungkook smiles shyly, and it’s adorable because he’s literally balls deep in you right now. 

“I thought it was no-go.” 

“Please,” you roll your eyes playfully– but you’re soon cut off by a particular thrust. Jungkook knows this too, as he begins peppering kisses all over your jaw, humming to let you know he’s still listening. You stammer a little, but you manage to let out a continuation of your sentence, “I let you put your dick in my ass and spit in my mouth. Nothing is no-go between us at this point.” 

Your joke may not have been the funniest – as it just further riles Jungkook up by the way he suddenly picks up his speec. 

“Oh, fuck, you little minx – you really had to say that, huh?” He emerges from your neck and grabs your jaw – albeit softly. “Get me real fucking hard talking about those.” 

“You can do them to me on camera now.” you say, challenging. And you laugh when you feel him literally freeze. But it’s not as funny anymore when his cock throbs inside of you, and suddenly, you feel the urge to cum again. To release one more time.

He recovers quickly from the shock, though. “Yeah?” 

You gasp when he plunges his cock back into you, only leaving the first half of his length before he enters again. He repeats that motion until your neck is craned back and your eyes are seeing stars. 

“Keep going like that— yes, yes!” You say, starting to get hysterical because you can feel that coil in the pit of your stomach now. 

Just a few more pumps and it will come out anytime soon. 

“You’re so fucking hot and pretty, look at you.” Jungkook sighs, taking a hold of your hips this time so he can hit deeper. And he does hit deeper, alright – that it doesn’t really take too long before you spasm around his length again, your fifth orgasm hitting you like a ton of bricks. 

You lie there on the mattress completely lax while Jungkook goes on with a few more erratic trusts until you feel that hot liquid cum shooting straight to your hole. 

The both of you mewl in unison at the sensation, with Jungkook kissing your mouth to bask in the moment.

When he breaks away, he caresses your cheek and plants a sweet peck to the tip of your nose.

“We’re filming the sextape tomorrow but can I take a video of your pussy full of my cum right now?” He asks seriously, and his polite tone – as if he’s requesting something at the White House – makes you laugh again. You're so giggly now that he's back. Go figure.

(How you love him so much.)

“Okay.” you say, and you watch as his eyes widen, cock twitching inside your pussy that he still hasn’t pulled out from you yet.

“Fuck, you’re the fucking best.” He says as he picks up his phone from the nightstand. 

Turning it sideways, he grips the device with his left hand, turning the camera to your body. 

“Just make sure it doesn’t pick up my face, okay?” You say, but nonetheless enjoy the sight of his hooded eyes roaming around your naked body like he’s high on it. 

“I know. I’ll do that.” Jungkook murmurs, but you know he’s distracted, especially when you finally get to see the sudden shift in position where he’s kneeling on his calf now in between your spread legs. “Open wider for me, baby, let the camera see how full you are with my cock and cum.” 

You hiss at that, and you let Jungkook guide your thigh with his free hand as he helps you spread the two of them wider.

“Hold them for me, princess, just a min.” Jungkook says, folding your knees until they’re all up in your chest. With his help, you relax in that position, waiting for what he does next. “Good. Good girl. Always so behaved…” he trails off, and slowly, he slides out his cock from your heat. 

Jungkook thinks your face is the most beautiful he’s ever seen and your pussy stuffed, leaking with his cum is a close second. 

“Fuck.” He whispers, making sure the camera captures just how white your pussy is now with his thick cum – a product of five straight orgasms he’d coaxed out from you. He wants to highlight the way your pussy throbs, but sadly with the bad lighting and him using a phone camera, he can’t. 

Still, he relishes in the high of seeing you bare like this. With the tip of his cock just right beside your pussy, he slides the crown back to gather all the cum that dripped out, pushing it back into you. 

There's an overspill that coats his dick as well, and it’s making him feel things. Like his cock getting hard again even though he just came the second time. 

“Oh, Jungkook…” You sigh out, feeling overstimulated now. But as you look at his face, completely distracted, you enjoy the view instead. “You like that, baby?” You ask meekly, thinking that maybe he’d like that when he watches this again. 

“So fucking much, you have no fucking idea.” Jungkook huffs. “You’re so full already but there’s still so much leaking out.” 

“That’s all of you, Jungkook,” You say sweetly. 

“Hm. I know… shit… I just wanna do this everyday.” 

“Film is?” You snort. 

“Fucking you… being with you. I was going crazy in my hotel room at LA. Just wanna be with you all the time.” He laments. Jungkook presses on the phone and suddenly, he puts it back on the nightstand. 

“Awe. Poor baby.” You respond, tapping his forearm, putting your legs down while Jungkook soothes your thighs with gentle rubbing. 

You thought he’s done for the night, but suddenly, he says, “Angel, I may have lied. Can we film the sextape tonight, please?” 

You laugh. Again. And Jungkook just falls down your body, snuggles close to your chest as you instantly play with his hair. 

“Alright.” You say, craning your neck down to press a kiss on the crown of his head. 

[miiilowo]

long post but ive got a story to tell. i do think the funniest/most insane Scary Thing that happened to me was at my parents friends house. me n my brother were friends with Their kids, so we'd come over and stay a couple days to a week every so often. normally, they'd Tell the kids when we were coming, but we wanted to surprise them in the morning. so, my parents went inside, and me, my brother, and their oldest sister all decided to hang outside for a bit. cause yknow. adults tend to have more volume control than kids. harder to alert the littles to our Presence that way

it was a big sorta farmhouse property. nice 2 story building on top of a hill, crops on one side, field behind and on the side. there was a very very VEEEEERRRRYYY steep incline that led to their barn, which you could technically crawl up/down if you tried real hard, but usually you'd just walk down the gravel road that looped around to it. next to the top of this incline was the top of the Overall Hill, a trampoline, and the house. secluded area. generally pretty nice.

all 3 of us were sitting on the trampoline hanging out, waiting for our cue to come inside. it was probably around 10 pm, so not super late, but late enough to be dark. arranged in a Triangle Formation. I was facing the slope that led down to the barn, and my brother and the eldest sister were both facing me. had a steady conversation going. i look out toward the incline and immediately stop talking. because there was . well. a fucking ghost. there was a floating white wispy Thing floating just beyond the edge of the hill, with a single glowing red eye. bobbing in the wind. after i Sort Of understand what im looking at, i start screaming my heart out, and the other two have no idea what the hell my problem is since they aren't facing that direction. so my brother turns. he sees it. he starts screaming. their sister turns. she sees it. SHE starts screaming. after a few seconds she goes "WHY ARE WE SITTING HERE? GO! GO!" and we all scramble inside, leave our shoes by the trampoline, damage our feet on the gravel, so on so forth in the panic

all three of us were absolutely hysterical. so hysterical, in fact, that the adults had grabbed their guns because they genuinely thought we were like. Being Murdered. they eventually managed to calm us down enough to explain what happened, and they immediately got suspicious when we said it was a ghost, but yknow. obviously we had to have seen Something with how freaked out we were. so they go outside to investigate!

our "ghost" was the kid's uncle. he knew we'd be out there, so he had laid down flat on the side of that incline so we couldnt see him, attached an old ratty tshirt to a couple of tied-together wires, and fastened a red flashlight to it. let it sway in the wind. he thought it was hilarious. nobody else thought it was hilarious. every single time i came over past that point i made it my Mission to try and scare him back, but I never once succeeded. They've moved since then, and I don't think I'll ever see them again. The fact that i couldn't seek revenge on that old man will haunt me on my deathbed. It will keep me writhing in my grave

[ardienothesieno]

post game isat thoughts i have

what the title says i have thoughts in my brain and i want to share them

isafrin date thing pretty much immediately post-game: sif should get to be sick for at least a week. and the party fusses over them the whole time and it's adorable and then i think one night. sif should turn to isa and ask if he wants to hang out. hehe and sif brings isa to go look at the stars this time! and it's sort of like isa's friendquest but this time they are actually snuggling. and not just talking about isa, they're talking bout sif too some of the stuff isa says is reminiscent of the loops which freaks sif out a bit. but it just makes them happy to hear isabeau talk and he would share some things that happened in the loops-- wholesome things of course i think it'd still be a while before they opened up about the uh. the worse shit. but stuff like teaching bonnie to fight, finding out they were allergic to pineapple the hard way (isa would be freaked by this but sif finds it hilarious), maybe tell him about wish craft and color theory, the change god helping them out, bombing the king, etc etc. the nice stuff. AND THEN. I THINK THE ISA USING A SHOOTING STAR AS A DISTRACTION THING SHOULD HAPPEN-- BUT ITS REAL THIS TIME <3 like sif looks up and it's a whole freaking meteor shower... and isa tells them to make a wish, to which they respond "i'm not messing with that again for a looooong time" :)))) and i just think that should culminate in isa carrying a sleeping sif back to either the clocktower or the house, wherever the family has set up shop... njhgfcftyhujkuhgvfcdfty i love them they're so cute

LOOP THOUGHTS. i dont know if i am committing to this hc, but i think it would be cool if loop and siffrin became a system of sorts? i know very little about plurality so i dont really know what im talking about... if i get anything wrong please tell me! but ive got yet another scene in mind like right before the party leaves dormont to go pick up nille, sif visits the favor tree one last time. just. reminiscing. and mira would come along and find him and they'd have a talk! not specifically about loop, but loop would definitely come up in the conversation and then at some point sif says that loop mentioned that they'd be coming back and is like "i wonder when we'll see them again" and loop just screams HOW ABOUT RIGHT NOW and shoves siffrin out of front jhugtfcvfdxscfgthbnygvh i think loop should still get to have their own body and autonomy and stuff, i just think they should also be able to just show up in sif's head. and vice versa i think eventually sif figures out how to do it as well and they just get to constantly bother each other from a shared headspace dcgbnjuytfg

and. and then i think that can lead into a lot of sad wholesome moments where sif lets loop be siffrin for a little while. like the party is sitting around a campfire telling stories and being happy, sif notices loop hanging around in the headspace, and lets them drive for a bit. i dont think they'd do it very often or for super long or anything but. hgfcdxcfgybhnj. they should get to be siffrin every once in a while too. as time goes on and they become more of their own person they do it less and less, but for the first few months to a year or so it's comforting to be able to be surrounded by versions of their past family, if only for a bit as i said. i dont know what im talking about really so if i said anything badly or if any of these ideas are bad please let me know

time craft shenanigans i think sif (and loop) should get to keep time craft powers after the loops end not to like. the extreme that the loops were. but like how sif will loop back like five minutes if they screw something up socially-- i think they should get to keep that EXCEPT. the party learns to pick up on what time craft feels like. so if theyre ever talking to sif and boom weird time craft feeling and sif is in a wildly different emotional state they can just go "sif. did you loop back. what happened." i think it would be a good. like. starting therapy point? them having a toxic coping mechanism for when things go badly and the rest of the group helping him work through those situations instead of avoiding avoiding avoiding and i think loop should keep it for the memes (and trauma reasons. but mostly the memes.)

it would get better with time, as siffrin (and loop) gets more and more comfortable with being uncomfortable and messing up and learning to work through the anxiety and and and then that could lead to a big situation a few years in the future when the group splits up. and sif is TERRIFIED that the loops will start again i dont think the group would ever split up for good though. they're a family!!! they're not gonna just leave each other behind after another few months of traveling!!!! that just means all the suffering sif went through was for nothing!!!!! and yeah, they cant stay together forever. i know. but even after splitting up they'd still definitely have family reunions like every other tuesday

BUT SIF AND ISA NEVER SPLIT UP EVER. NOT EVEN FOR FIVE MINUTES they get bonded and go on to open a boutique/trinket shop <3

[beanarie]

fanfic writer answers!

thank you for the questions! ❤️

@nzchance 8, 20

Is there a story idea you have that you would love if it could appear fully realized but that you do not think you’ll ever write yourself?

i really really really would've liked to contribute more madi-focused fic for black sails, especially a post finale epic dealing with all her years afterwards. but i never got her voice down to the point where i felt comfortable writing in her pov. characters who are good and responsible and driven without gaping holes in their armor are hard for me to get a handle on.

Is there anything about any one of your fics that you have been dying to discuss but haven’t had the chance to?

in the parent trap fic, tommy's story about changing denny's diapers. he and sal and chim went over to hen's because she was super injured! she wasn't just a deadbeat making her coworkers parent her infant son (the first time. second and third were kind of up for interpretation). tommy didn't explain that because he didn't think news of his mom almost dying on the job right after she got him would've made denny feel great.

(more q&a after the cut)

@trombonechurchill 1, 5

Have you pulled inspiration from media sources other than the property your fic is related to (a plot point from a TV show that has nothing to do with the characters/setting of the fic, a line from a book, etc.)? If so, for which story? Why did you find that media source compelling?

sea legs, my mal/eames story, was very influenced by mid-career guy ritchie movies snatch and rocknrolla. tom hardy played the character of all time in rocknrolla. it wasn't the hugest of leaps.

Is there a tiny detail in one of your fics that you feel goes tragically unnoticed?

this is more directors commentary than "y'all missed this". in an awful and dreary blank, tommy actually got his phone taken away from him because he was spending ten minutes writing an individual text, getting more agitated as each reply came in from buck, and his chief was like, okay, enough. i'm gonna hold onto that, because if you go on like this for much longer someone is gonna sedate you.

@geddyqueer 3, 15

What is the most amount of research you’ve done for the smallest detail? What was the detail and how much time/effort went into researching it?

can i count my work experience as research time?? because i have spent hours and hours in outpatient clinics, hospitals, and sub acute rehabs just so i can add, like, "annoying healthcare PSAs were playing on a loop over the speakers" lol. oh, black sails was fun because at one point i had to wonder what they even did with fish in the 1700s, and that led to a throwaway line about packing it in salt.

Is there any genre, trope, or style that you find particularly challenging to write? Do you enjoy the challenge or prefer to avoid it?

i'm really not a plot girlie. and i don't do action scenes (currently stuck on one!). i get very pleased with myself when i'm able to write around it so there's Stuff going on, just not on the main stage. like, there's a seasoning of plot. i don't seek out plotty concepts unless i can figure out how to shove it in the background.

@bidisasterevankinard 10, 11

If you could banish a single trope to live at the bottom of the ocean, never to be seen again by any human eyes (or at least your own), which trope would that be?

sex pollen. intellectually, theoretically, i understand the appeal, but the concept squicks me hard.

Conversely, if you had to pick a single trope to read for the next seven-and-half years, which trope would that be?

whump, h/c. it's sort of ingrained in me. this is so embarrassing but when i was little, i would play hospital with my stuffed animals, bandage them up with toilet paper, make IV lines with scotch tape (my mom was just telling someone this for some reason!).

[the-s1lly-corner]

Ookay this one is really really tooth rotting fluff level

Tadc x reader who just realized christmas is coming, and is freaking out with absolute glee and childlike wonder

TADC cast x reader who loves christmas!

AAAAAA im so so sorry i could have sworn i answered this but i guess i didnt??? i promise i didnt mean to leave this in the inbox this long on purpose i think i must have lost track of stuff </3 regardless, i hope you enjoy! admin must admit, asides from presents and the christmas tree, he doesnt do many holiday activities so... admin is underqualified for this but hes still gonna try! a lot of the character segments intertwine in this btw! like not in a "similar idea" thing but in a "they are actually overlapping and interacting with one another" way so !! side note unrelated to the post eheheheh the second batch of macarons have been piped! theyre now on the counter set out to dry, and ive got my ganaches out to get to room temperature so i can whip em up into a frosting :3

CAINE:

oh i just know that caine would lean hard into holiday stuff, plus i think he has the best sense of time in the digital world out of everyone.. plus he just seems like the kind of guy to celebrate all sorts of holidays, not just christmas! year round stuff, you know? not just winter... so you guys would likely team up and totally deck out the grounds to match the holiday spirit! sure caine on his own already puts in way too much effort decorating everything, he even makes it snow! but with you around he cranks it up to 11! lets just hope there arent any scrooges around, though.... also prepare yourself because he would definitely find a way to have christmas music play on loop in the background... somewhere... ambient music but its festive songs... i think caine is also the one responsible for most of the presents, since he can basically get most things with just a flick of his wrist! ooooo perhaps a date (platonic or romantic! up to you!) where you guys wrap the gifts together!

POMNI:

funny enough, while i usually think pomni would SUCK at cooking, i think she can make a mean hot coco. granted, hot coco and/or hot chocolate arent the hardest things to make, but... i dont know, its just different when she makes it... (recommendation from the admin, add a bit of cinnamon or nutmeg to your hot coco its a game changer frfr, this goes for a lot of chocolate stuff, actually. its like the chocolate-coffee effect but like. makes a different flavor profile. add a bit of nutmeg to your chocolate chip goodies. rn.)

anyways! pomni always keeps you supplied with hot coco, and honestly it benefits you both! keeps you nice and warm, plus its delicious; and it gives pomni something to do... i mean, its christmas... surely she can take it easy from trying to find the exit... just for the season... helps with her anxiety about the whole situation, you know? making digital food sure is weird, though...

RAGATHA:

as mentioned in gangles part, she joins you and gangle in helping making a skirt for the tree! keeping up with the idea of sewing things, i think she would also make stockings for everyone; leaving most of them blank so everyone can customize them however they like... but you and her get together to decorate your own together and just !! i just think thats sweet! depending on how soon caine starts putting the christmas stuff around, you and her might be able to make some ugly sweaters for yourselves! thats a christmas thing, right? oooo and they match.... OOOO YOU GUYS MAKE AN EXTRA LONG SCARF FOR YOU GUYS TO SHARE!!!! rolls around... she makes you mittens so you can go mess around in the snow caine put all over the grounds

JAX:

snowball fight. and i mean really intense once. in fact it wouldnt be too much of a stress to call it a snowball WAR! honestly jax might just be the type to put rocks in his snowballs.... but because this is meant to be nice and sweet, he wont... just this once, and because he feels TOO mean crushing your holiday spirit (even if your digital body would quickly recover from the possible injury...)

you guys make forts and go absolutely ham. the stuff ragatha had made for the two of you! i mean sure you guys cant succumb to hypothermia, buuuuuuuuuut being really painfully cold still sucks... but the sweaters help you guys stay out for longer to play! and you can perhaps ask pomni to make some hot coco

oh yes its all coming together

ooo perhaps you convince jax to make snow angels and snowmen with you... though, i think jax would make the snowmen purposefully unappealing... but maybe you think hes actually trying his best... oh you jolly little thing..

KINGER:

okay so i admit this one might be a stretch and its mostly because his robe already has the fur and he gives off grandpa energy (even though hes only 48 but hey some grandpas become grandpas young) but imagine somehow someway he dresses up as santa (and i say that loosely, his robe turns red and the fur turns a plain white), bonus if he wears a hat to tie in the entire look. while caine is the one getting the gifts and wrapping them, i like to think kinger would ask to be the one to put them under the tree at an ungodly hour. sweet man. chews

as for an interaction with the reader... hmm.. hes the last character im writing, everyone else already has their parts done... the one christmas activity i can think of that hasnt been taken yet is baking! honestly i can see him being a decent chef! maybe its the dad/granddad energy speaking to me again... perhaps its the admin projecting... buuuut imagine you two make shaped cookies togehter; stars, candy canes, trees, bells, ect... and you ice them together! sure they may not be the prettiest or look the most professional; but does that really matter when youre having fun? they still taste delicious!

ZOOBLE:

ok i get it, i tend to lean hard into the zooble being negative and/or unimpressed with things a liiiiiiiiittle too often, but again zooble doesnt strike me as the type to enjoy most holidays. they seem more of a halloween person to me, you know? though, i think that they would switch out their antennae for ones that resemble antlers more... or if they dont have those, they string lights up on them! all for you, just because they know how excited the holiday makes you. they dont care about many things, but they care about you... and if it means doing (harmless) things they normally wouldnt do, then so be it! dont expect them to get in on many holiday activities, though...

GANGLE:

you and her make decorations for the grounds and the giant digital tree caine put in the main common area! handmade ornaments, paper stars and snowflakes, things like that! you and gangle stay up take cutting each thing, applying the colors and the glitter and any small details.... dozens of times.... because caine chose a tree that was way too big than it needed to be.... oh you might have to have gangle on your shoulders so she can reach the higher points of the tree! sits and thinks.... ooouuuuuuuuugh you guys make a skirt for the tree together with the help of ragatha... little group activity... sobs...

[fortruechaos]

After Maria dies in front of him a second time Shadow wanders. He knows there's something he has to do. It's something he doesn't want to do, but he knows he must. He knows it's not a feeling he's meant to feel but it doesn't mean anything else when all he can identify is his rage. The inhibitor rings mean nothing to him now, all this Chaos in his blood is simply ichor fuel. He approaches the empty square the rocket he had once taken to the ARK long ago. He circles it. He would take an IV to his veins if it could fuel that rocket with his Chaos-infused blood. It has to be good for something.

Legs move mechanically around and around that abandoned square of concrete. There's no rocket here anymore. How can I get to the ARK? How can I get to the ARK so I can crash it into the planet? I already got all the Chaos Emeralds, so that part's already done. I already blew up Prison Island. That fake hedgehog. He pauses to realize he has the green Chaos Emerald on him and reaches into his quills to pull it out and looks at it like it's a stranger, holding it up to pale moonlight, thinking, "It all starts with this--," but that was years ago. The Emerald goes back into his quills. That's fine. He can make amends now. For Maria. Maria who died in front of him a second time and this time it was just his fault with no one else to blame. Vengeance...

He's still walking in the same loop. Around a worn-in piece of concrete with some faded paint on it. GUN hasn't used this outpost in years. He's something more of a skeletal creature with his arms hanging all ball-jointed like at his sides than he is hedgehog. I have to get to the ARK. Walk. I can't get to the ARK, so I'll just walk. Around and around like a vinyl. How many broken records are on-board the ARK right now, the ARK that he will crash into the planet? It's what Maria wants him to do so he will do it. Ungrateful humans. A sneer in his heart behind sunglasses; a sneer belonging to the Professor.

Shadow's not even looking anymore. Seeing but not, eyes half-lidded, the jets in his skates turned off as he plods heavily around the same stretch of square. The same half-piece of fern in the broken concrete greets him for the n-teenth time. How can I get to the ARK? Lab experiment turned weapon and Shadow likes to do what the Professor tells him to do so he will think on it some more; don't worry, Professor. Plodding on all Godot-like, waiting, waiting waiting--

A million years that feel like one night pass. Spent shuffling like moving shadow on the ground, time tracked only by the slinging motion of his fingers at his side. He takes the Emerald out from his quills and looks at it again. He's been walking for so long the sun is coming up now and he's still walking; Shadow catches a reflected ruby eye in the transient green cut of jewel. Somehow this startles him back into something resembling person-hood. The first real feeling that is his own is fear, again. He's had enough of that. Shadow crouches and shakes again, hand clutching the Emerald furiously, clinging to that source of Chaos like a lifeline. It pushes and floods into his palms, bells ringing in battery-operated eardrums, neurons firing, remembering the truth, just one hedgehog all by himself on an abandoned launchpad. I have to get to the ARK but I don't want to. I am so afraid of what will happen if I do.

Eventually exhaustion takes him and he collapses. The Chaos of the Emerald at combat with his damaged psyche. The Emerald clatters onto asphalt, fingertips just barely brushing smooth gemstone. Shadow is grateful when he faints. He does not faint often. He does not dream. It is welcome.

Shadow wakes to a hand on his shoulder, gently pushing. Somehow, it's Sonic. Idiot. "No," he half-says half-moans with despair, pushing his face into the ground as hard as he can, somehow himself again. "NO...!! Fuck you, this is your fault!" It's easy for him to blame someone that isn't him right now--the hand on his shoulder releases. Shadow can hear a whispered oh boy, and his head flies up to shoot daggers at a wilting smile on Sonic's face.

"She's okay," Sonic offers, voice a million degrees removed from the reality of the situation, and Shadow's hands turn into fists as he pushes himself up onto his elbows into an arced fetal position and screams--screams because he's himself again and for what he's done, fully cognizant, the Professor's hold on him slipping into the shade of his heart again. His scream asks Why did I do that and What do I have to do to be free? and If I am the Ultimate why am I so afraid of myself still? And then he gets up, wipes his mouth with the back of a hand, and reclaims his Emerald. A stifled, scuffed breath through his nose. Shadow's shoulders rise and fall. He clears his throat, line that is his mouth shifting. He's all business. He's the Ultimate Lifeform.

"Where is she."

[c0rinarii]

WELL! I have just concluded the game that i bought on impulse bc i was hyperfixating on some of the characters (guess who!). I have A LOT of thoughts, but i'll start with some nutshell character thoughts and pairing shenanigains. Spoilers below!

That 4th tier deserves a bit of elaboration

Juro: He is, at his core, a blank sheet of paper. A mild sandwich with no seasoning. And I like how this game handled that fact bc he was someone more prior to this, but he's given a new personality so he can rest from being so self-sacrificing (if he's anything like the juro izumi from 2 loops ago). He's in the "they're there" tier for a special reason, bc he's kind of meant to be just There.

Renya: Despite being there just to help the audience answer some questions regarding the fucked up narrative of the story, I think what gives him a leg up from the "They're there" tier is his lowkey hilarious relationship with Ryoko. He is perplexed and lowkey salty about how short their relationship lasted no matter how hard he tries. He tries to not gaf as much as Ryoko does but he still does. Ei calls him out on this. Its so so funny.

Megumi: HER NARRATIVE ON GRIEF WAS VERY WELL DONE and if it werent for the spaghetti bullshit of an ending the epilogue was, I would be soooo so intrested how she'd handle moving on from Izumi. I find the concept of Juro/Megumi much more bearable with Juro now having one sided feelings for Megumi while Megumi considers giving him a chance or not. That wouldve been a great closing to their relationship instead of. just getting toghether with no qualms! yeah juro i totally wasnt mouring a dead version of you in that simulation. lets kiss.

Miyuki: I KNEW YOU COULD SAVE THOSE KIDS WITHOUT INFLICTING SEVERE TRAUMA. Sadly aside from "saviour from above" themeing with her, theres nothing much outside of that. While im greatful she was there, she is just there in the end. But her efforts give her a leg up from that tier.

Chihiro: The concept of a very peeved elderly woman stuck in a pre-schoolers body is a funny one and im just extremely glad that 13SAR is not big enough that sobposters arent using her at large to fufill their degen fantasies. Aside from that shtick though, nothing else. Thats literally a baby

Moving onto the canon main pairings!:

I saw someone calling HijiOki queer-bait and i can kindaaaa see why when basing it off the epilogue. Yeah they havent seem to progress much past 5 years and are at best still at talking stage while some of the others are literally married with kids (oh i'll get to that.) But I like to see it as the only pairing with realistic progression past. everything thats happened. Aside that they're just very funny!! Love their dynamic, will be rooting for them no matter how long it takes.

I did not expect myself to like SekiFuyu this much!! I do agree that Iori ESPECIALLY deserves more story outside hanging with gals and crushing over Sekigahara (not to say i didnt like it!!), but im very glad that the story subverted my expectations! I want them to be happy first and foremost, but i feel like the added angst from Iori realisng that she was a clone of THE Chihiro Morimura wouldve made this ship just a little bit more peak. Aside that, I support Iori shoujoisms and Sekigahara finding love and happiness.

I think my rating on Nentomi will change the more I ruminate on it. MeguJuro would be bumped up above RenRyo IF they didnt immediately fall in love after those 5 years and have Megumi still "thinking about it" while Juro goes "pleaaase :(" bc i think Megumi deserves to tease him a lil and think more about What the hell happened. ShuuYuki is the worst case of comphet between a lesbian and a looser bisexual ive seen.

Now.... the elephant in the room.

Ive talked to moots about how much i abhored the ending at first. Aside from the Darling in the Franxx-esque cop out, you expect me to believe that some of them just. got toghether after everything?? without any processing of What The Hell just happened?? nothing at all?? god

Im not the one to usually complain about comphet bc yeah its something i hate, but it usually doesnt sour my experience of consuming media so much. But god this is where its one of the main reasons why an ending is ruined for me. I hate hate HATED some of the epilogue scenes, esp with Nentomi and Shuuyuki bc of the straight people "my wife sucks but i love her" humour it radiates. ugh.

I would've loved a much more... bleak? more bittersweet?? outlook on the situation? after realisng everything is not real and you are basically the 15 adam and eves left to recreate human civilzation... that would be a pretty fucking huge thing to grapple with. I just wished that they had more complexity with this ending. Or! just stick with the fact that they're forever trapped in space colonies left to deal with the horrors of their situations and the mistakes of those in the past. Sorry for bring a tragic yuri enjoyer, but the overbearing dread and loom from the simulation story was what really made me intrested in 13SAR. To see it just solve itself with little drawback was so lame.

I read the George Kamitani aimed for 13SAR to have a mecha and shoujo hybrid story. While that's honestly an awesome concept, im sad it means that he can miss out on more complexity when intepretting the narrative when it comes to certain relationships (shoujos can be complex too!) I also heard that the game was meant to be at least 3 times longer that it is curently which is. wow. Its a shame that so much content got cut out 😭 bc i feel like a bit more time with these characters is all i need to make my verdict more positive.

As a bonus, i'll include a crackship tierlist too! Alot has changed

I miiight need another few days or even weeks to compile another thoughts post bc theres definitely more things i wanna talk about (the narrative structure, Tamao, 2188 theories, themes of japanese imperialism-). But so far, im gonna let it ruminate for a bit before picking it back up to analyse

[murdleandmarot]

9, 8, 2, 20 :3

Sorry this took a while to get to 😭😭😭 I was making unwise financial decisions in a book store

Hi hello!!!!!!!

2. Favorite Song Character: This is SO HARDDDD UGGHHH…..I love them all so much grrrrrr

I’m gonna narrow this down for myself to songs ABOUT a character, and then go from there, because I could argue with myself about this for hours. Because while Macavity slaps, Macavity would slap. Me. In the face. With his claws.

I’m gonna have to be a lil basic and go with Mistoffelees :). I just….love him lots…..and Tugger is always so fucking excited to sing about his special guy…..

8. Favorite Make-up: Oooo good question……I have a couple favorites (that aren’t from 1998 because let’s be honest I could rant about 1998 makeup forever (even though it’s the most subdued)).

Off of the top of my head, Tugger from Hamburg 1991, Jellylorum from Macskák 2001 I believe? (I think it’s Hungary, either in 2000 or 2001), Skimble and Misto from Mexico’s tours in 2013, Macavity from Buenos Aires and Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer from what I THINK is a Canadian tour.

I’ll put pictures of all these guys under the cut, I ADORE the makeup in these shows, and there are a ton more that I didn’t bring up.

9. Favorite song?: Another hard fucking question 😭😭😭 why would you do this to bestie. I don’t think I can pick a favorite, (the only song I actively am not the biggest fan of is journey to the Heavyside layer, and I STILL cry during it).

I think the song I listen to most as an actual SONG, like in my playlist along with fuckin Mitski or Aurora would have to be The Rum Tum Tugger? It’s just easily digestible, a very vibe worthy song, whereas other fun songs like Macavity are very much a moment, yk? (Shoutout to mungo and rumple, because Ive looped their song for weeks at a time (the German version vibes so hard it’s so good)).

20. Did you see cats live? If so, where?:

I fucking DID and I am mad about it TO THIS DAY. I’m SO mad. I’m not gonna reveal the location because that would be very not good and Internet safe™️, but it was at a theater that housed tours of shows, which means I also got to see Jesus Christ Superstar, Hadestown, Hamilton, the like. Thank god my father is a huge theater nerd.

Anyhow, I saw Cats when I was 13, and I remember loving it, and that I picked up on Misto and Tugger immediately.

And that is ALL I remember. WHY? Because not only was I 13, I was coming down from being an Uber-depressed 12 year old, which means there is a year and a half of my life that is almost ENTIRELY gone. Literally could not have picked a worse time to go to see Cats. Every time I’m reminded that I saw Cats live and literally don’t remember it, I throw myself upon the floor in despair.

Makeup stuff under the cut :))

Tugger, Hamburg 1991, Siegmar Tonk, though you won’t find him on the fandom wiki, even though he’s gorgeous and great, because he’s a swing

(Best quality photos, I could take from the beginning of Mistoffelees :)

So, the production on YouTube with the Jellylorum I’m talking about is named ‘Macskák musical 1. felvonás,’ and has a description in what I think is Hungarian? It says it’s from 2001, and was most likely performed in Budapest, Hungary. I can’t find any gallery images on the wiki, or a record of this production, or who plays THIS version of Jelly, or even if that’s her name in this version. Anyhow, this is she

She looks like a lil clown :)) a lil jester. Also why is there a random guy here??? Because in this production they just bring in Hungarian celebrities randomly and it’s especially funny during Skimbleshanks’s numbers because the guy turns up in a suit, and eventually gets more disheveled as the song goes on. Skimbleshanks and him COMMIT though.

Skimbleshanks, Luigi Vidal, Mexico 2013 and Mistoffelees, Orville Alvarado, also Mexico 2013

(Shoutout to Mexico 2013-2015 in general, it just looks rly cool)

Macavity, Diego Jaraz, Buenos Aires 1993

SIR MARRY ME 🫶🫶🫶❤️❤️❤️💍💍💍

Mungojerrie und Rumpleteazer, Canada, actors and time unknown to me 💔(I know SOMEONE literally told me because I ASKED but I don’t REMEMBER mutual if you recognize these guys PLEASE tell me)

@jennyanypenny I THINK IT WAS YOU PLEASE LMK IF YOU KNOW WHO THESE TWO ARE

(honorable mention to ‘98 Pouncival n Macavity)

[vulpixisananimal]

YOOOOOO HAPPY BIRTHDAY PIX!! im on my main for asks but hiiii its meeeee the loopartisttttt < i still think about how my loopdesign from last may got canonized. it feels so nice. god ive been following the au for like. a year now. crazy. been an absolute banger, hoping the fixations circle back around so i can go crazy over it again sometime. even without it tho oh my GODDD poor bonnie...and the foreshadowing of putting nilles ref sheet with the antagonists is CRAZYYYY you are COOKING.

IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR IT'S CRAZY SO CRAZY! Your loop design goes so hard forever so much thank you again I've loved all your drawings and GOD.

And. Teehee~ yes. That was intentional foreshadowing. I promise. Totally.

[blazefirefox]

So I just watched Hadestown for the second time live today at my local theater and IT'S STILL SO GOOD IM DYING IM BALLING (bawling)

there are some pretty neat things I noticed, which I wanted to announce for y'all's pleasure:

[Spoilers for Hadestown. obviously]

this Hermes served SO MUCH. like the readings were off the chart wth

also the eurydice was pretty af. she was an understudy but she was SO GOOD AGHUBDFJKBAHL

this orpheus also slayed immensely, but an interesting thing was that he had a lot more range than any other orpheus ive seen (at least more than reeve carney)

like obviously he could hit those high notes but his voice also got really loud and gritty, especially during if it's true

this kinda ties in to this productions Hades, since yeah he still had his really deep voice but it was really melodic at times, more than hades usually has

this is interesting to me bc it kinda. bridges the gap between Hades and Orpheus?? like Orpheus had some of the grittiness in his voice that Hades is known for while Hades could go a bit softer like Orpheus, which of course goes back to how they're parallels. am I reading too much into this? maybe

anyways, obviously this production didn't have the rotating stage and all that stuff, so the characters had to exit off to the side, but there was actually a lot of stuff they added that added some charm to that

like when persephone & hades left after way down hadestown, there was smoke coming from offstage, implying the train they're boarding, and at the beginning of chant II, while the ensemble is singing the 'is it true?' part, you could see their shadows from backstage on the back wall, which was a fire visual

eurydice was taller than orpheus. that's it. that's everything to me

also the autism was strong with this orpheus. during any way the wind blows when eurydice was asking for a match, he raised his hand excitedly and tried to give her one before Hermes gave her one. my boy was so enthusiastic. idk if this is in the regular production but I liked it

the fates were amazing in this production. like I love them normally, but they just had so many quips ig. they made more sounds lol. they hissed, they trilled, they cackled! I love them sm

persephone slapped hermes' ass at the beginning of our lady of the underground.

during way down hadestown reprise, eurydice sometimes turned to the musicians on stage for help, which has many interesting implications lmao

this isnt really an observation, but Im kinda enamored by how papers starts with the workers dancing/beating up orpheus before ending with actually beating the shit out of him

orpheus did an opt up at the end of if it's true. I didn't even know he could do that.

DURING EPIC III EURYDICE WAS CRYING. LIKE I SAW HER. IDK IF THAT WAS THE ACTRESS LEGIT CRYING BUT THAT GOT ME. THAT GOT ME. SHE WAS STILL CRYING DURING THE INSTRUMENTAL WHILE HADES & PERSEPHONE WERE DANCING AUGJKA

also after the big climax of epic III, orpheus actually sang a few different verses than the actual song. like new lines I haven't heard before which was. really fucking cool.

OBSESSED WITH DOUBT COMES IN STILL. since they obviously couldn't have eurydice be lowered down below stage, when orpheus looked back, she tryed to run towards him before being stopped by some of the ensemble, freezing, was lifted up into the air, AND CARRIED OFF STAGE. WHICH HIT REALLY HARD OK.

idk if this was in the original production, but at the end when eurydice is looking through her bag, she pulls out the carnation, which technically she shouldn't have at that point, but she does bc. bc. time loop. crying sobbing

yeah im not gonna be normal about this sorry.

[residualmanifest]

this mouthwashing fanimation on twitter has been on loop in my head joetastic you are so damn funny #SWANSEA #SHOOT HIM [LINK] and i had some SPOILER thoughts to say and at this point i put so many in the tags i'm just putting it in a read more #sexual assault mention

ive been talking w a pal and a lot of signs w the game as it goes on tells me that if anya eventually told swansea and then from there theres options of like . 1. she asks him not to confront him cause it was clear to me she wanted support and not direct confrontation Due To How Much Longer they're on that damn ship . or 2. classic misogyny moment of 'just endure it'

but i think it's more likely curly was the only one she told, since he was the 'highest authority' as the captain and after the way he responded, she shut down and had a pretty common thought process of "well if he was so blaise' about it, anyone else would be too" and its HARD ENOUGH to admit something like that happened to you one time, but esp with a response like that how would you open up again . so you swallow it but that only works for so long and the inevitable time bomb of her pregnancy, it was all like . ;_; she felt she had No Choice and i dont think she did !!! trapped on the SHIP !!! speaking from my own experiences it's how im viewing it .

swansea definitely just didn't like jimmy cause his vibes are so damn rancid too lol . but also the more i think about it the more i think any reality of whether she shared that w him or not like . you Can See the -disdain and contempt he has for him . i really like how a lot of it is pretty open ended, you don't see a true linear way of how every character feels about every single moment . just the perspective of jimmy and then curly . i was telling cygnus but it pissed me off so bad that he had Nothing To Say when you discover Anya it broke my heart . of COURSE he wouldn't he's a misogynist and he hated her and sexually assaulted her . HE SUCKS !!! the overall story is such a well done tragedy .

its funny how me linking this goofy ass video had me writing all this out but i wanted to give a couple of my interpretations of it . it was also pissing me off seeing people say swansea wouldn't give a shit either way . did we see the same interactions LOL i'm not saying he COULDN'T be a misogynist, as the game is clearly themed around that, but saying there's no way he'd give a shit ... you dn't understand ...

anyhoo . i love anya . her story was so tragic . i'm excited to do another playthrough soon to really tie together more of my thoughts and also see her again :) i've got nothing but sympathy for her and the way wrong organ wrote her interactions and responses is really intense for me . its very realistic when taking her personality into thought too . this is a bit all over the place but i'm getting back into the swing of expressing my media thoughts

EDIT: going back 2 the replies and this response is definitely waht got my mind chugging

[syrupspinner]

i am obsessed with roman sands re:build

so now im gonna talk about it for a looooooong time. you can hit j to skip posts

roman sands re:build is an upcoming game developed by arbitrary metric (paratropic) and published by serenity forge (ddlc+, lisa definitive edition, slay the princess pristine, basically if it has text boxes and is an updated release it was these guys). notably, it is a remake of a visual novel just called roman sands, but ive deliberately avoided learning anything about the older release because I don't want spoilers

it's hard to pin it to one genre. you could call it an adventure game? you take first-person control of someone... interchangeable. nobody cares about your name, and people seem to use whatever pronouns is most convenient for their perception of you in any given moment. anyway, it's your job to be the busybody at this resort. fulfill requests until the day ends, which takes four room transitions. you start in the morning when you first enter the main doors, then it goes to noon, then afternoon, then evening, then you quit

then it's the next day. you're in a time loop... probably. this is also just what working in retail is like, I've been told. every day has you do the same thing for the same people. oh, speaking of,

everybody hates you. there are four hotel guests: Betty, who will yell about hoe youre awful at your job and you should be ashamed; her husband Harold, who is scatterbrained and weak-willed but at least knows how to say thanks: Sylvia, a high-class lady who condescends at you; and... bunk

I mentioned your perception is inconsistent. Betty sees you as maliciously incompetent, Sylvia is equally insulting but in a way that's more concerned with emphasizing her own superiority, and I'm not sure if Harold even knows you work here. but bunk can flip-flop in the moment. sometimes, he sees you as one of the guys that he can talk with about the good old days where you could complement women on their bodies without them calling hr. sometimes he sees you as one of those women. he doesn't care about who you are in the slightest, you're just a means of gratifying whatever whims he has. well, the others are like that too, but bunk is the most obviously carnal.

the main gameplay loop sees you routing the most efficient way to maximize your XP gain. since entering a door advances time, and the tasks reset every loop, you can do stuff like... getting Betty's pills before she asks for them, and going through the side door so you can fetch Harold a chair before he asks for it. cutting down on backtracking means you can do as much work as possible in as short amount of time as possible, just like a real overworked minimum wage service worker!

the games design and atmosphere does a great job at distilling this sense of frantic pace-keeping. I could never play stuff like diner Dash cuz I always got overwhelmed by having to keep all the orders straight and worrying about customers getting even a little unhappy. RSr:B fixes both of those problems, the former by making everything predictable enough to plan around and account for with previous attempts explicitly not mattering. the later is addressed by making everyone a stupid jerk.

also, just because i dont realy dwell on it, the aesthetic is amazing for non-thematic reasons. i love the use of cool colours despite the tropical setting, it emphasizes the tranquility that is intended by the location, and heavily contrasts with the presence of the sun as a threat to the narrative, which emphasizes the threat's dismissal. wait shit thats a thematic reason again, fuck. i love pretty dreamcast beaches and shiny y2k ui elements and the stupid stretchy noodle people. it just looks so cool man. im and english student not an art studen so i cant really articulate why i think that without just saying its pretty and i like looking at it.

anyway, there are so many minor mechanical things that are built to goad you into hurrying the fuck up. you start each day with two minutes on the clock, and if that clock runs out, you... miss out on a little xp boost. if you walk on an arrow path to whatever task is closest, you go way faster, encouraging you to move straight from one request to the other without breathing. and you cant select responses by scrolling through a menu, you have to select it from the number row. its like in a shooter, if you couldnt use a weapon wheel and always had to quick-select, which of course encourages you to be quick

there's enough that encourages you not to get too stagnant with your loops too. first, there's a sense of mutual exclusivity. there is only one drink, and two people want it. second, there's unlockable items! this is the main use of leveling up. for example, you can get a mop to clean bunks puke (don't actually you'll softlock and the demo doesn't save) or get that checkbook Silvia wants you to sign. or a simple toolbox

ooo, another thing is the tutorial. just when youre about to enter the doors, you get a pop-up of a girl telling you stuff lie "keep your head down" and "hurry up" that dont actually tutorialize much of the gameplay itself. i think this is another deliberate satire of capitalism. the most important part about getting and maintaining a job isnt your skillset, its who you know and how well you adhere to the culture. it doesnt matter how well you do the skills if you dont know your place

also, the game is really good about teaching you things naturalistically. betty asks you for a marg (with the pop-up lady redundantly telling you to get her the marg, but this would be really helpful to the players that were very understandably overwhelmed/disoriented by being yelled at by three people at once). bring it to her and she immediately barks another order at you, which tells the player that you talk to people to get requests. then, you go outside and get her pills like she asked, and you learn about the mechanic where time pass when you go to a different area.

the main goal of the demo, the main thing you're working towards, is fixing the elevator. well youre in luck, because the thing that you get from being level 3 (which you can get in your first day if you know what youre doing) is a toolbox. its not robust enough to fix the boiler in the basement, but... actually no it cant do anything about the elevator because its too sulfur-y. from here im going to spoil the central puzzle to completing the demo, so if anything ive said sounds interesting, leave now and play it

so! if you take some time to look around, youll notice the orrery. yes thats its name, yes thats a real word, yes i also misread it as ossuary and got super concerned for a minute. the orrery it has a large yellow chunk in the middle, and a planet missing from the display. theres a solar system display in the main lobby. so take the planet thats logically missing from both displays (or just take em all and just see which one fits - its mercury btw) and put it into place. now just... rotate the display until the planets align and beam the sun from the left into into the yellow chunk and... it retracts, showing you the idea of sulfur. you can use that to fix the elevator, and then the demo ends! nothing noteworthy or worth mentioning happens after that point. nope, not even [withheld]. look i know too many people that ignore spoiler warning but i still wanna leave something for them to discover when they play the demo, because you are going to play the demo

now, with everything (audible wink) established about what this game is, lets talk about why it is that way. i know i usually jump right into the analysis assuming that the reader already knows about the game, but like, there are three people who have posted about this on tumblr. two of them are developers and im the other one.

so first and foremost, ripping the bandaid off, this game is anticapitalist as fuck. you play as a service worker that has their humanity brushed aside at best for the sake of fulfilling menial tasks. your paycheck is sporatic, and they only things you can spend it on are consumerist trash that literally does not matter. at the end of the work day you vanish into the sea, crawling right back out when the next day starts, as a metaphor for how the people being serviced by these workers see them as their job and nothing else, dehumanizing them to the point that nobody in the game realizes that youre a human being first and a worker second. your opinions and feelings dont matter, just your labour. and i dont have to tell you that the time loop represents the banal repetition of the 9-to-5.

also, its getting hotter. every day is one tick off the countdown where the sun fucks the big one and... maybe youll die, maybe youll just be in hell. this is also anticapitalist, because this is pretty obviously... fuck i dont even wanna call it a metaphor because it just kind of is climate anxiety. its mentioned once as something too far in the future to care about, if its even a problem at all, and youre expected to go about your day without thinking about it. but at the end of every day you still see it. n days until the sun dies. just ignore it, you cant do anything about it

the aesthetic plays into this too. you know im a sucker for paradise-like locals, and my favorite thing you can do in them is explore what goes on behind the curtain to make them paradise. like, in Paradise Killer, a lot of ink is spilled over human "workers" sacrificing their lives to build something that will just be scrapped for some trivial imperfection. here, you essentially play as one of the humans trying to upkeep the illusion of perfection. its supposed to be incongruent to your gameplay experience because youre just a worker, your experience doesnt matter, this is all for the guests sake. your frantic gameplay is deliberately contrasted with the serene locale and calming music

oh! the calming music! theres one track in the game that isnt a chill beat, and its... the level up music. the first thing i thought of when i saw it? a slot machine. did you know theyre often designed to have flashy and appealing scenes play out both when you win and when you lose? its to subconsciously trick your brain into thinking youre doing a better job than you are, that youre winning in some way just by continuing to pour your money away. i dont think thats a coincidence. first, slot machines are a great symbol of the evils of capitalism, a machine that only offers the "service" of a slim chance of receiving money that, realistically speaking, is dwarfed by what youve already lost. the purpose of a system is what it does, and gambling as a systemic part of life is successful in bankrupting as many vulnerable people as possible.

how does that play into roman sands re:build? well, like a slot machine, the extravagance of the music and the visuals exists to play up what youre getting. on one hand, this is just a reasonable way to design a game, emphasize gameplay rewards with something flashy so players have an increased sense of accomplishment. on the other, this is meant to convince the player that slow incremental progress towards finally earning the right to use a mop bucket is something worth celebrating. it reminds me of how often employers try to trick their employees into being satisfied with stuff like pizza parties instead of, like, raises. this may sound like a stretch to you but id like to take a moment to remind you that this game includes a gacha system for literal useless trash for no other reason than to satirize how consumerism encourages you to spend money on things that cost as little as possible, valuing consumption for consumption's sake rather than the actual value of what youre consuming. why wouldnt they extend this to also satirize how capitalism undervalues workers by withholding basic amenities and minimal compensation as a reward for doing as much as you can as fast as you can? keep working, motherfucker, maybe youll get that better toolbox soon

wage theft is one of the most common forms of abuse done to the working class. it follows, then, that it is one of the most normalized. it takes many forms, like unpaid overtime and withholding benefits. perhaps the most notable are forcing employees to purchase mandatory equipment out of pocket (a central game mechanic as discussed earlier) and asking employees to do things outside of the scope of their position. of course, this is how the gameplay works on a fundamental level. you are asked to do the work of a receptionist, a janitor, a bartender, and even a masseuse. notably, this is done by the customers and not the administration. I'll get into the lack of a distinct employer figure later, so for now I'll go into how the layman's complacency in abusive systems seems to be a major theme of the game

yknow what im gonna talk more about harold. the other guests are actively disrespectful and directly abusive to you, so Harold definitely stands out. he requests things from you politely, and shows you sincere gratitude. here's the thing though, he's TOO accepting. Betty arguably treats you the worst out of the four guests, and Harold is never seen even attempting to oppose her. he's on to something when he hears the vmmmmm vmmmm noise from the basement, because there's a giant ominous machine if unknown purpose, but Betty yells at him until he stops caring. his abuse towards you, the working class, is not through shouting insults at your capability or sexual assault or insulting your personhood directly. it's through witnessing you be mistreated, and embracing it as the status quo, making the most requests to you out of everybody. at least when the others dehumanize you they're blunt about it, but Harold being the nicest person while still only seeing you as a worker to be commanded stings in a special way. being treated this way is normal, it's the best you can hope for

not only does Harold serve an important role in showing how complacency in an abusive system helps perpetuate it just the same as active participation, but he also more specifically connects to the climate change metaphor. just as all the guests mistreat you in a unique way, they all dismiss the growing heat in unique ways. bunk notices it, but is too caught in his vices and self-loathing to really care that much about the realistic consequences inplied by the fucking su dying. betty says that shes fine with an awful thing happening to everyone because itll probably hurt the people she hates, meaning she definitely votes conservative. and Harold, having heard all this, questions it but soon blissfully dismisses his concerns, a toxic positivity urging him that things always turn out for the best. the other viewpoints are selfish in self-explanatory ways, with Harold representing the climate deniers who see the topic as too confusing and complicated to hold a proper opinion on. Harold I'm shoving a microphone in your face how do you feel about the conflict in the middle east

did you notice i didnt mention sylvia? she doesnt comment. she takes the moment to passively insult those shes around. between you and me, i think she knows more than she lets on, it seems too much like shes deliberately dodging the topic. also, from the way she talks about couture later, specifically upholding it as something godly and unfit for mere cattle (the player) it kinda feels like she has to be in some higher position. or being on the same level as the lower-class that she demonstrably hates is really starting to get to her, and she feels the need to distance herself from the likes of us.

let's get back to the lack of an employer figure. depending on how you interpret [withheld] it can be theorized that kara (yes thats her name no you didnt miss anything) holds this role, especially since it seems to be her in the tutorial pop-ups. I disagree with this for more wide-scope reasons, I think you sincerely washed up in shore one day. the doyalist explanation is that it is how all workers are seen to operate. the working class is not envisioned by those they serve as having lives outside of their job. how often have you considered what your cashier's hobbies might be? their family, their weekend plans, their politics? youre probably just waiting for the card reader to let you scan and go home, all you're worried about is the service provided by their labour. I'm using "you" but I do this exact shit all the time too, to be clear. anyway, it further emphasizes the guests dehumanization of you in their perception. they can imagine that when a human works at a job, they answer to a boss. but when presented with a service, a worker just becomes a means to that end, and their humanity is replaced by their labour.

even if you didn't disappear into the sea, it wouldn't make any difference to them, they only think about you to acknowledge when you're not performing with proper efficiency, just like how you don't think about your clothes until they stop fitting, or you don't comment on roads without potholes, because there's nothing remarkable about meeting expectations.

so. what's up with that anyway. I've yapped about metaphors and figurative representation for a while now, but what's the lore? well, fuck if I know, it's a demo. but I've got some theories

theory one, it's a simulation. that would make sense with what is presented to us in the [withheld] segment, and also explain the time loop succinctly. the vmmmmmm machine could be some sort of core of the simulation? the lobby is full of larger-than-life paintings and sculptures, which may be foreshadowing that the entire world you're in is also man made (also, since i dont bring it up anywhere, i like how youre surrounded by art by never encouraged to interact with it, highlighting how capitalist obligation prevents us from truly appreciating the artistic). it is all but told to you that you're an interchangeable replacement for a previous employee, whatever happened to them, and some sort of matrix-style disposable humanity schema would fit right in to that. for the rest I can just say "it's like that one visual novel" and I think most of you will get it

theory two, it's the afterlife. it would make sense considering the location is called paradise in marketing. sulfur as an element is heavily associated with demons, so perhaps there's meant to be some symbolism that's made more solid in later parts of the game? here i can say its interesting that you obtain it by stepping outside of your role and not adhering to commands, which can parallel an angel disobeying the will of god. and using it to actively solve the problem could represent breaking traditional thought with new ways of thinking outside of doctrine? i dunno, it's hard to really say what it represents in the grand scheme before I've like, played the whole thing. also, that could mean [withheld] is a flashback to before you were conscripted into servitude (read: died), especially since the store page specifies that its post-apocalyptic. the cow imagery gains a double meaning here as well: they're seen as livestock meant to be literally churned into product, but hinduism sees them as sacred. something something essential worker, most see the proletariat as a disposable beast of meat, the animal itself just a means to an end of what they produce, but a select enlightened subsect of the world understand their importance to upkeeping society. which i guess are marxists in this metaphor? again ive only played the demo so this is 70% extrapolation

oh, speaking of cows, you can find a cow that has suffocated from neglect. I think this can connect to the whole worker dehumanization theme, but my intuition tells me it'll be more relevant to the [withheld] parts, in a way that is complimentary but still stands alone. god that part is so interesting, kara just could not wait to talk about dying. the voice actress nailed that shit

okay one last thing. the release was originally planned for summer 2023. its almost 2025 and the steam page still says "coming soon". completely sincerely: good shit. it would be hilariously pathetic to overwork for an arbitrary metric deadline when the entire game is like, about how shit that specific practice is. I love to see devs taking their time to make things the best they can.

if you can't tell I'm. kind of excited for this game. i dont usually go this in-depth but the thought of this thing instills the innate autistic urge to yap deep within my soul. but like i said earlier i dont really have the capacity to talk about stuff like how it looks and how it plays without just blindly gushing. did you know in the gameplay reveal trailer on serenity forge's youtube channel, your character nudges forward a little bit whenever they pick something up? this doesnt seem to still be the case, as interacting with objects now gives a full-screen prompt with the option to pick it up or examine it. also you dont seem to be any further forward when the prompt goes away.

okay. im gonna try and be less biased and come up with a critique. um, the demo could benefit from a save system, since its pretty easy for players who are taking their time and taking in the atmosphere to spend over an hour on this. you could argue that since the game is about going fast and being efficient through time loops that its not that big of a deal, and i agree! if a player quits the demo halfway through they can get back to where they were pretty quickly. but the demo does have a few glitches, like moments where it softlocked on a selection menu and it forced me to alt+f4. i know this'll be fixed in the full game anyway though so who cares.

uhhh i can see people being thrown off my having to click the mouse to advance dialogue but not being able to click menu options? i explained earlier how i think thats thematically resonant, but themes or no themes its still an inconvenience that players might have a problem with. the game has the colours and animations so built-in to how it works im not sure how robust the accessibility options are gonna be but that remains to be seen. but players are already complaining that the demo made em motion sick so i hope people sensitive to that kinda thing still have a chance to enjoy this. theres also how it isnt very obvious that you can select other planets in the lobby solar system but the dev said theyd improve that for the full release so im not gonna make a redundant suggestion.

um. there are probably. other things? accessibility/approachability is pretty important, but im just trying to be considerate of other potential players. if youre asking about what i, personally, think needs to be improved i can think of much. maybe if you play you can find a flaw, cuz i sure didnt. when you play the demo, let me know if i missed anything! i feel like i discover something new to talk about every time i launch this thing, which... is too often i think

this post is 4000 words. its almost 4 am. play the demo for roman sands re:build and add it to your steam wishlist.

[red-dyed-sarumane]

aru sekai shoushitsu is an 11 minute song i listened to on accident because i was too tired to look at the length & was just solely like man thats such a cool title for a vocaloid song i hope it lives up to it and it 100% did. i didnt have any idea there was a story behind it it just thought it was such a cool sounding song & i remember clearly playing animal crossing past 4am with it on loop. completely forgot the producers name & didnt recognize them when they posted kyuuyaku hankagai so it took me like 3 days to actually listen to it & the SECOND i heard the nami no ne no motif i lost my mind. that was it for me ive been so deep into it since then i dont think theres a way to pull me out. at the start everything had such weird phrasing it was so hard to sort out what was stylistic and what was direct story telling & even now its sometimes difficult, but the fact with every new song we get a new version of the story and new info & everything ties together to consistently for a project made by one person over the course of several years with this level of detail.

going from knowing its a story about trying and failing to prevent the world's destruction to finding out not only are they doomed to repeat it, the only way out is to completely give up on their own self and accept total death. putting together the timeline from little hints some of which u have to sort through which is fact and which is a character's own narration distorted by either their emotions or intentionally. the fact the story telling is not entirely direct, the lyrics are only one facet of it, it goes as far as using the genre of the song to express things, theres just so much. ive been into my fair share of vocaloid song projects but this is the most precise and delicately handled one i've encountered. there is so much care and attention put into every single one of those songs it would just be insulting to not take it seriously. there was a moment i was worried it was going to turn into the same song but different when we got maximizer and then kanon and i'm so so glad that isn't the case because the way theyre handling it now really shows how important it is to them. this is a person who posts some of the most ridiculous memes ive seen & has some now popular meme songs and even with that attention they've said they're continuing to take the series seriously and that alone says so so much about the weight of this project to them.

i'll be honest with you i dont think there's a good end to this story. with the info we have now, with how aru sekai shoushitsu, the story outline song, goes i cannot see a happy ending for any of these characters. i wouldn't be surprised if it turned out we're only being shown one instance of that certain world & it ends in a way that implies despite all their efforts it's just going to happen all the same all over again, just with certain people lost forever and others willing to try more underhanded tactics to try their ideas that ultimately wont work anyway. i don't think there will be a real resolution to any of the problems. but even then there are so many currently unrevealed secrets & the overall commentary the work is making in the first place that sticking around for whatever ending we're given will be well worth the wait

[theguardianace]

trying to piece together outer wild for a sec dont mind me

ok so what i know so far

nomai came from somewhere in space looking for the eye of the universe. they ended up getting sucked into dark bramble during the warp and got stuck. only 2 escape pods made it out, who then built a civilization on every single planet in the solar system.

they continued looking for the eye by building the orbital probe cannon. however, when it launches at the start of every loop, it shatters. it worked, though.

as far as i know the nomai never found the eye. i think it's quantum because the signal is so hard to track, though i have no confirmation. i would need to actually explore the quantum moon to figure this out i believe

after discovering the time properties behind warping, they created the ash twin project to create a 22 minute time interval whenever the sun went supernova. they built the sun station to make the sun go supernova, but it failed.

gabbro and i are the only ones stuck in a loop, because we regain our memories from the statues we bonded with every time the sun goes supernova.

the universe is dying. the sun has reached the end of it's natural life cycle. there is nothing we can do to un-supernova the sun.

the nomai found our ancestors on timber hearth and thought we were cute :)

feldspar do be chilling on dark bramble. because they're just like that.

the nomai explored using gravity cannons/ships. from brittle hollow, solanum went to the quantum moon but never returned. her remains are on the moon and i don't like that. three others went to the interloper from ember twin, though i haven't been yet.

stuff i still gotta figure out

ive never actually been to hollows lantern and lived to land. lol

ive also never been on the interloper. probably should check it out.

what killed the nomai? it wasn't a civilization reason- they had schools, and factories, and everything it seems they needed to survive. they didn't blow up the sun. with the way their remains are scattered, it appears that their death was sudden. like they all just. died instantly of. something. but what?

speaking of dying what's ghost matter? i used to think it was haunted rocks from the nomai but with a game so. sciencey. i don' think that makes sense.

also why is there no life literally anywhere in the universe (except dark bramble but screw the angler fish). there's no way it's just us and pine trees.

what do i do with the warp core

is it even possible to save my friends

i need to find the vessel. i know Where it is i just never made it that far lol

why 22 minutes? why that specific time interval?

[aquaquadrant]

Hello there! I wanted to take a moment to let you know that Htp has captured my interest like no other story has ever done. Ive read it multiple times and even battled severe fatigue and stomach pains (i was very sick) til 2 because I was set hard on reading it from beginning to end after chapter 9 was released (not the brightest choice on my part). And I know that sounds over exaggerated and made up but Im telling the truth. Im not typically someone who is interested in angsty storylines, but Hels to Pay is the sole exception. The way you write the characters is so poetic, they feel so real and their problems and courses of action due to their problems are super understandable even if its not the right choice of action and their viewpoint is flawed, which only makes them feel more real. You can feel their dread, their frustration, their anger, everything, and that takes crazy talent and careful crafting.

I just finished my therapy session and when I explained how Hels to Pay is the odd one out as far as my Mcyt related interests and talked about chapter 9 and my therapist told me that unlike other characters where i feel their emotions through a sense of empathy, my infatuation with Tango and the way he responds to certain situations (especially post hels invasion) could be because I can relate to that feeling and choice in action and honestly, Ive never felt that way with a character, and Its comforting because him being that way makes me feel heard and understood, rather then ridiculed.

My point is, the HTP fanfic has not only stood out to me on a writing standpoint, but also impacted the way I view myself in a positive way and I think that’s something you should be extremely proud of.

I just wanted to say “thank you” to you and Lunar for sharing such a beautifully crafted Au with the world. I hope you take care of yourself, that 2024 treats you right, and that I cant wait to see where Hels To Pay goes (when the fic starts up again).

~Anon

(P.s Ive also been listening to the playlist on loop, you got good taste)

(Feel no obligation to respond to this ask, I just wanted to share this with you)

AAUUUUUGHH…. this was a really nice message to receive. it means a lot to know my writing had that much of an impact. lord knows i’ve leaned on fanfiction during difficult times of my life, so i’m happy to provide that same escape for others.

thanks so much for sharing, and best of luck with everything <3