#it is truly just she only displays love and support for me when I’m not exhibiting symptoms of my mental instability that make me

[marvelsmylife]

Not As It Seems

Pairing: Rhysand x reader 

Plot: to outsiders they see your life is perfect. Being mated to one of the most powerful high lords and named high lady of the night court everyone thought you were happy (including your mate). What happens when the mask you’ve been wearing finally falls and Rhysand discovers what’s been troubling his darling mate.

a/n This is based on this request. Let me know if you want a part two where Rhysand confronts the person responsible for his mate's suffering.

ACOTAR Masterlist

Prompt List

If someone had told you when you were younger that you would be mated with the high lord of the night court and given the title of high lady you would’ve laughed in their faces. Yet here you were, living every female’s (and some males) dream of being mated to Rhysand.

You met Rhysand one cold autumn morning. You had arrived at your job two hours ago at your bakery when Rhysand strolled in and requested one of every pastry you had for sale. You gave him a puzzled look and asked if he was sure: “Of course I’m sure. I could smell your delicious pastries a few blocks away,” Rhysand responded with a warm smile on his face.

A shy smile crept up on your face at Rhysand’s compliment. While you were used to everyone always complimenting you on your pastries, having your high lord compliment you made you go shy. “I’m flattered,” you sheepishly said while carefully placing the treats in the box.

A surprising look appeared on Rhysand’s face when took the box from your hands and took in your appearance. Mate Rhysand mentally told himself when he realized you were the female he had been dreaming about for as long as he could remember.

Not wanting to scare you off, Rhysand settled with simply asking you out to dinner before slowly revealing that you were mates.

He was grateful he did that. You built your relationship organically, and when he finally confessed that you were mates, instead of resenting him for hiding such a secret, you kissed him and told him how happy you were that you were mates. 

There was only one problem in your relationship, you rarely talked about your family and what you were like growing up. Every time he tried to pry into your past or family, you would always charge the subject or ask him to drop it. He was tempted sometimes to slither into your mind and see what was so bad about your childhood that you refused to talk to him about. 

He didn’t though.

He knew you would resent him if he invaded your privacy in that way just to get an answer. Instead, he’d change the subject to something more pleasant.

It’s not that you didn’t want to tell Rhysand about your childhood. To people who didn’t know you personally, they thought you had a great childhood. But the people who truly knew you knew that was the farthest thing from the truth.

While you were still in contact with your mother, your relationship with her was complicated, to say the least. Growing up, your mother would display all the signs of a narcissistic parent. Always finding a way to make your accomplishments hers and insult you when you did something minutely wrong.

It got worse when you were an adult and opened the bakery you still operated. She didn’t ask; she demanded that you give her half of your earnings from the bakery to make up for raising you. You foolishly agreed to her demand even though you were barely making enough to support yourself when you met Rhysand.

Once you had your mating ceremony, Rhysand would beg you to stop working because he had more than enough and then some to support you, but you rejected him each time. You didn’t want to put the burden of supporting your mother on Rhysand, so you told him you just loved your work too much to close it.

Because you were under so much stress with not only running your bakery by yourself but also doing the duties a high lady is supposed to do, you found yourself stretching yourself thin. You couldn’t find a moment in your day to just sit and relax, and when you did, it was only for a few minutes.

Unfortunately, that manifested into you not wanting to do anything during the days you actually managed to get off and started developing depression episodes.

You didn’t want anyone to know you were silently suffering, especially Rhysand’s. He had so much on his plate, and you didn’t want to add to his worries. So you’d force a smile so no one would know; know that you were silently fighting with your mother because she was growing more entitled to your money. Your mental shield was always up and so guarded; not even Rhysand could penetrate it.

You finally hit your breaking point one afternoon when your mother stopped by your bakery and demanded that you tell Rhysand he needed to start paying her money as well. In her words: “His money is your money, and your money is my money.”

Not being able to contain your anger towards your mother, you unleash all the frustration you have had towards her for the past three centuries. By the end of it, your mother dared to slap you across the face and growled: “You ungrateful child! You would have nothing if it wasn’t for me! I should have been Rhysand’s mate so I could have that fortune you have, not you. But seeing as you are his mate, I’m expecting you to give me his money by the end of the week,” before storming out of the bakery and disappearing into the streets of Velaris.

You didn’t know how you managed to get home, but when you did, you had the inner circle panicked with the state you were in. “Y/n. Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Mor asked, worry laced in her tone: “Azriel, Cassian, go get Rhysand he’s-”.

Azriel and Cassian were out the door before Mor had a chance to finish her sentence.

Mor and Amren meanwhile tried to get you to sit down with them, but you just brushed them off and disappeared into your bedroom. You knew they meant well, but you wanted to lock yourself in your room.

Not even five minutes later, Rhysand burst through your shared bedroom. Rhysand knelt down and cupped your face: “My darling y/n, please tell me what’s wrong? Tell me so I can help you,” there was a sense of panic in his voice.

“I’m tired Rhysand” you replied blandly. Rhysand remained silent as the other stormed into the room and watched the scene in front of them: “I’m so fucking tired of pretending I’m ok.”

@paankhaleyaar @amara-moonlight @favsrachz

[ginnsbaker]

In Losing Grip On Sinking Ships (16/22)

Chapter summary: You go through a difficult period following your breakup with Yelena, and you and Wanda end up falling down the rabbit hole for the second time around

Chapter word count: 6.4K | Warnings: Angst, Mild smut | Ship: Wanda x Female Reader

Author's note: Before you say anything, I have a plan. Enjoy :) P.S. My requests are open

AO3 | Masterlist 

Next chapter: Seventeen Part One

--

Sixteen

“And then she kissed you?” Agatha asks. She looks the same way she does when she’s actively participating in gossip, hanging onto every detail of the latest scandal that keeps most people entertained in their insignificant lives.

Wanda solemnly nods, as if validating a piece of tragic news.

“Why aren't you thrilled?” Agatha observes quietly, picking at her tooth with her fingernail. “I mean, doesn't that confirm that she still has feelings for you?”

“You remember what happened last time, right? When she did more than just kiss me?”

Agatha grimaces, “Right, of all places, in our stockroom." Then, her tone morphs into a more probing one, “But, did the kiss feel as if she just wanted to get into your pants?”

Wanda lets out a sigh, her heartbeat quickening as she reminisces about its tenderness. It felt akin to a first kiss—vulnerable, slightly apprehensive, tinged with anxiety, and yet, at the same time familiar—like finding her way back home.

It was perfect in every sense. 

But it was tainted by its very nature. It was a betrayal. And if there were truly raw feelings behind it, then it’s worse—it would mean that you have been emotionally unfaithful to Yelena. 

Wanda may have ruined yet another relationship.

In the midst of her internal struggle, she finally manages to answer Agatha, “It felt like hope,” giving voice to her undeniable feelings for you. “But she’s with Yelena.”

“I never really had faith in that relationship to begin with,” Agatha retorts dismissively, cleaning her hands with a towel before reaching for one of the cookies on display.

“That's a terrible thing to say,” Wanda chides.

“I’m only being honest,” Agatha says, unapologetic in her bluntness. “You were fucking each other like rabbits and then a few weeks later, she gets a girlfriend. That's a classic rebound scenario. I'm surprised the woman she's with allowed herself to be used like that.”

Wanda finds Agatha’s uninhibited words a little offensive, though she understands that their deepening friendship has allowed for such unfiltered honesty between them. Even though she's jealous of Yelena, Wanda understands that she is good for you. She doesn't like how Agatha talks about Yelena as if she's too naive to try a relationship with you.

Wanda feels she can relate with Yelena. Often, love makes us scared that we might never get a second chance, so we choose to take a leap of faith, despite the warning signs.

“So, what are you planning to do about it?” Agatha asks, taking a bite of her favorite cookie. Wanda makes a mental note to deduct that cookie from the stock count.

Wanda shakes her head, replying, “Nothing,”

Agatha pauses mid-chew, her eyes wide with shock. Wanda can't help but observe the crumbs of food lodged in her teeth. “You're not going to seize this opportunity?” Agatha questions, disbelief coating her voice.

“Y/N needs to sort things out,” Wanda lets out a heavy sigh. “Without my interference.”

“You’re not afraid of missing out on this chance?”

Wanda sidesteps Agatha's question with one of her own. “Why are you suddenly supportive? It wasn’t long ago when you couldn't stand her.”

“I’m supportive of you. I’m rooting for your happiness, dear. But I’ve seen you at your worst, and I think you’re putting on a brave face right now.”

Wanda's eyes dip down. Her friend isn’t entirely wrong.

“What happens if she decides to stay with Yelena?” Agatha probes further.

Wanda's response isn't immediate; she takes a moment, seemingly lost in thought, before replying softly, “Then I hope she’ll be very happy with her.” 

Agatha rolls her eyes, because of course, Wanda would say that. Even if you were being served to her on a silver platter, she’d worry for your happiness over her own. 

“And where does that leave you?” Agatha asks, folding her arms across her chest.

Wanda lifts her shoulders in a casual shrug, her face unreadable. “Living life as it comes, I guess. Just one day at a time.”

At this, Agatha decides to drop the subject. She has a strong feeling that Wanda’s just waiting for you to come to her, and when you do, she's certain that Wanda won't maintain this pretense of indifference. As for Wanda, she doesn’t want to obsess over what you’re doing or thinking. She doesn’t want to make the same mistake of hoping for an outcome that only you can decide.

Switching topics, Agatha raises an eyebrow and asks, “And the pup? Is he doing okay?”

Wanda smiles faintly, “I brought him home yesterday.”

“Well, that's a relief,” Agatha remarks. “Do you reckon Sparky masterminded all this to get Y/N to your place at an ungodly hour? Can dogs be that crafty?”

Wanda throws her an incredulous look. “Are you being serious right now?”

A wicked giggle slips from Agatha, spreading until Wanda finds herself laughing along. She doesn't notice the arrival of a guest until the distinct sound of the call bell jars her attention.

It’s Valkyrie, casually leaning against the countertop, looking awkward and so unlike her usual self.

Agatha casts a sly glance at Peter, who's been trying to catch her eye ever since Valkyrie stepped into the cafe. When Agatha isn't around, Peter fills her in on the latest happenings, a reliable source of juicy tidbits. Peter quirks his brows and discreetly nods towards Valkyrie, his mouth miming a silent message. Reading his lips, Agatha pieces together that this is the woman who recently found herself entangled in Wanda's intricate web.

Agatha sweeps her eyes over the woman appreciatively. Not bad. Not bad at all.

Wanda rubs her palms together, a habit she’s developed before taking a customer order. “Hi, Val! What is it for today? We have new beans delivered all the way from Niseko–”

“Actually,” Valkyrie softly cuts her off. “I was hoping we could talk?”

Agatha watches their exchange, an eager twinkle in her eyes. With the pace at which interesting events are unraveling, she may as well pop a bag of microwave popcorn to truly savor the unfolding drama.

Wanda nods and moves away from the counter, temporarily handing the reins to Agatha. They pick a spot in the furthest corner from the kitchen, well out of earshot, much to Agatha's disappointment.

“First off, I owe you an apology,” Valkyrie begins. “I’d blame it on the alcohol, but there’s no excuse for me pressuring you too much to take shots. That wasn’t cool at all. You already said no several times and I ignored you.”

Wanda waves her off casually. “Oh, it's alright. I appreciate the apology, but it wasn't that big of a deal. You couldn't have forced me to drink if I really didn't want to, right?”

Valkyrie's frown dips further at Wanda's easy dismissal of the issue. “No, Wanda. If I'd kept on, I might've pushed you into it even if you didn't want to. I'm just glad Y/N stepped in when she did.”

Something flashes in Wanda’s eyes at the mention of your name. Valkyrie catches it but opts to ignore it for the meantime.

“Yeah, I did feel a bit cornered that night,” Wanda concedes, a smile returning to her face. “But it's water under the bridge now. Was there something else you needed to discuss?”

“You sure don't beat around the bush, do you?” Valkyrie attempts to lighten the mood, but her tension is evident in her shaky voice and the way her fingers fiddle with her watch.

Wanda chuckles. “It's a skill I've been honing lately.”

Taking a deep, measured breath, Valkyrie gathers her courage. "Alright, here it is..."

Wanda tilts her head at her curiously, wondering what it’s about.

“I like you,” Valkyrie blurts out. “I don’t normally confess to someone I’m not even dating, but you’re… incredible. That's how I feel about you and I thought you should know."

“Oh! Uh…” Wanda trails off, blushing at Valkyrie’s confession.

Valkyrie nibbles at her lip, observing as Wanda fumbles to put her thoughts into words. She silently hopes she's left Wanda speechless in a good way.

“There’s… someone,” Wanda manages to utter out eventually. “I've been in love with her for the better part of my life.” Or maybe her whole life, if she’s being brutally honest.

Valkyrie nods, her throat tightening to hold back the sting of rejection. “It's her, isn't it?” she ventures, silently alluding to you.

Wanda diverts her gaze and emits a modest laugh. She must have made her feelings too obvious for anyone to see.

“She’s my ex-wife,” is all the explanation Wanda offers.

“Wow,” Valkyrie looks taken aback by the revelation. “That sounds messy.”

“It's beyond messy,” Wanda retorts.

“Go on,” Valkyrie encourages.

Wanda looks at her, thoughtful. “Are you sure you want to delve into my past? It might take some time.”

Valkyrie smiles, already leaning in closer to signify that she’s all ears. “I made time this morning specifically to talk to you. I want to understand, at least, why I'm being rejected.”

Wanda chuckles softly at the gesture. Collecting her thoughts, she starts to narrate a condensed version of the turbulent history she's had, of how she ruined everything that’s good in her life.

When Wanda wraps up her story, Valkyrie simply says, "Wow, that's... pretty fucking messed up."

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” Wanda admits, biting her lower lip, anxiety swirling in her gaze. She worries that revealing her darkest past may have cost her a budding friendship. “I think I saw your interest, but I didn't want to jump to conclusions and have the wrong idea. I just wanted us to be friends. I still do, if that's okay with you.”

“Of course, I want to be friends with you, Wanda. More than the fact that you’re hot, we have a lot in common too.”

Wanda's cheeks tinge a soft pink at Valkyrie's flippant comment about her being ‘hot’.

“So, friends then?” Valkyrie extends her hand.

Wanda smiles in relief. “Friends.”

***

A phone call rouses you from sleep. You groggily glance at the clock and realize you've overslept.

“It’s done,” your lawyer's voice cuts through the grogginess as soon as you pick up the call.

Disoriented, you squint against the daylight streaming in through the window. “What are you referring to?” you inquire, your voice hoarse from sleep.

“Vision has settled,” she elaborates, her words crisp and distinct. “And he caught a flight to Tokyo last night.”

“He's gone?”

“From what I've heard, he intended to use the settlement money to finance his studies overseas. He won't be returning in the near future. But even if he does decide to cut his trip short, you're safe. He has no legal means to trouble you anymore,” she assures you.

“You've got snitches now?” you quip, your eyes narrowing in suspicion even as the beginnings of a smile tug at the corners of your mouth.

Her laughter rings out through the phone, followed by a breezy, “You're welcome,” before she ends the call.

It's over. A chapter of your past has finally closed. Vision has physically left the city, and you've literally paid your dues. You hadn't realized you were in a kind of self-imposed cage until now, when a sense of liberation pulses through your veins.

Before you can fully indulge in the relief provided by your lawyer's news, however, a persistent knock at your door breaks your reverie. You can't help but wonder who it could be, and how they bypassed the building's security without a notification from the concierge.

As you pull the door open, you find yourself face to face with the last person you expected to see.

“Nat?”

She appears ready to tear you apart. For a moment, the thought crosses your mind, 'this is it, this is how I go, at the hands of my best friend'. Strangely, you're indifferent to whatever she might inflict on you. Having her here at least affords you an opportunity to have a conversation.

Yet, Natasha doesn't respond. She doesn't even spare you a glance. Instead, she brushes past you and starts gathering random items into a large duffel bag she brought along.

“Nat, can you please just talk to me?”

“What for, Y/N? I have nothing to say to you.”

“Yelena broke up with me,” you say.

Natasha scoffs. “Yeah, no kidding.”

“Nat, please,” you plead. “You can’t just cut me out forever. I’m your best–”

“Are you?!” The outburst that tears from her is enough to make you recoil. “Are you my friend, Y/N? I woke up to my sister on my doorstep, in shambles. All thanks to my ‘friend’.”

You wrap your arms around yourself as tremors course through your body. Tears start to flow down your cheeks at the mere mention of Yelena.

“You want to talk? Fine, I’ll talk,” Natasha rages on. “I stood by you through thick and thin. I held your hand through all the shit you went through last year. I brought you into my home. I took care of you. I loved you–” Natasha's voice catches on 'loved', and your heart shatters at her use of the past tense.

“–and you just betrayed me, like I meant nothing. You betrayed my sister like she meant nothing. We both cared about you, Y/N.” Her voice dwindles near the end, her next words coming out just above a whisper. “So, no, we’re not friends. Not anymore.”

“Nat, I’m s–”

“You know what? I can’t fucking do this. I’m just gonna send someone to collect Yelena's things. If I don’t, just throw out her stuff like you did with your relationship. Goodbye, Y/N.”

The door slams shut behind her. You find yourself on the floor, curled into a ball, as you grieve the friendship you’ve known all your life.

***

Dark screens and unreturned messages follow.

Yelena has blocked you on every possible platform, cutting off any form of communication. Natasha hasn't, but she leaves all your messages unread, allowing your calls to go unanswered, seemingly enjoying your desperation. Clint ignores your texts, and Kate only responded once, promising to try and speak to Yelena for you. That was a week ago, and there's been no word since. You didn't think you'd be back in the dark place you were in a year ago, and the worst part is, you brought it on yourself this time.

The only news you get about Yelena is from your own mother. A few days after Yelena left your shared apartment, your mother called to ask what had happened. Apparently, Yelena had told her the news herself and asked her to take care of you and make sure you were alright. Throughout the call, you cried silently, feeling the remnants of Yelena's care for you even after you broke her heart.

And your mother, perennially at odds with handling emotions, simply offered her condolences. Although by doing so, she offered more support than she did when you were weathering your divorce from Wanda the year before. With your latest tragedy out of the way, she proceeded to ask if you could make time to visit Montauk over the holidays.

***

Drinking is… a problem. Again. 

But you approach it with more caution this time. You don’t drink as much at home so you can avoid not showing up at work the next day. Rather, you sneak in a flask in the office, sipping from it from time to time to keep you the right amount of…adrift. You’re too good with numbers that even with a little haze in your head, the alcohol doesn’t interfere with your work. 

It interferes with other thoughts.

***

When Kate finally calls you, you’re in the middle of a disastrous presentation at work. Her words had been brief, only giving you the time (three in the afternoon) and location (The New York Public Library) where she wanted to meet. 

It takes some time for you to locate Kate within the vast elegance of the Rose Main Reading Room. She's tucked away in the northeast corner, engrossed in her work, even on a Sunday. A towering pile of books rises to her eye level on her desk.

“I can’t believe I was wrong about you.” Kate says without looking up as you settle on the vacant seat next to her.

“Wrong about me?” you ask, keeping your voice in a hushed tone.

“I had this fleeting thought that you might actually be a good person.” she says.

Swallowing hard, you struggle to find a response, well aware that Kate is just laying out the facts. What kind of person would cheat on their best friend's sister? What kind of person would throw away years of trust and a lifelong friendship?

“She told you?” you finally manage to ask.

“Yelena didn’t say much,” Kate says with a hint of sorrow. “But I've never seen her look so…” she trails off, struggling to find the right words, and eventually concludes, “She doesn't look like the Yelena I know.”

You’re afraid to ask what she means by that. You haven’t looked in the mirror yourself, in fear of seeing the results of your own wreckage.

“She quit today, you know?” Kate reveals, setting down her pen to give you her full attention. You don't see resentment in her eyes, only caution. This is the most compassion you've been shown since your relationship with Yelena fell apart. 

The news of Yelena's resignation hits you like a punch to the gut. She had a promising career ahead of her, and she'd found a supportive environment in her workplace. It's hard to believe she'd just abandon that so abruptly. You feel a wave of nausea at the thought.

“I sort of saw it coming,” Kate adds. “Not her resignation–God, I tried my best to talk her out of it, but she wouldn't budge. I… I saw you running back to Wanda.”

Your eyes narrow curiously as you regard Kate. “How?” 

Kate sighs, pushing a pile of papers to the side to give you her full attention. “It's not a secret, you know. You might think you're being discreet, but you’re more transparent than you'd like to believe. You’re a completely different person when she’s around. I saw it during the 6-miler event we all joined by chance.”

There’s no point in denying any of that. The weeks that follow after that, you were crying to your mother regarding your conflicted feelings about Wanda. But if you had been aware of the signs as early as then, would things be different somehow?

“I didn't mean for any of this to happen, Kate,” you say, the words sounding weak and inadequate to your own ears.

“I know,” Kate says quietly, and there's a touch of sympathy in her eyes that makes you feel even worse. “But that doesn't change the fact that it did happen. And people are getting hurt because of it.”

You can sense that Kate is one of those people–by hurting Yelena, the girl she clearly loves. 

“I’m… I’m sorry,” you whisper. You wish there was another way to convey how sorry you are–a keyword to make it all go away.

“Yeah, me too. Mostly because I have to tell you that we can no longer be friends.” Kate says, looking genuinely upset about her decision, her gaze dropping to her hands as she twirls the pen between her fingers.

“I know,” you nod, appreciating her honesty. “Thank you.”

“Look, I have no idea how deep your thing with Wanda goes. All I know is you can’t keep running away. You can’t keep hiding behind the comfort of other people.”

You bob your head in acknowledgment, even though you're uncertain how to put her words into practice.

"Can you pass on a message to Yelena for me?" you ask, wringing your hands together nervously.

Kate lets out a sigh, her fingers halting their movement on the pen. “I’ll try. No promises though.”

“Could you tell her that I'm sorry...that I truly loved her?”

A moment of silence follows your request as Kate studies you, her lips pursed. It might seem hypocritical of you to make such a claim, but she refrains from passing judgment. But seeing your bloodshot eyes and your pale chapped lips and the lack of life in you, she thinks there’s probably some truth to it.

***

It takes you an additional week before you summon the courage to visit Wanda's apartment. 

Truth be told, you've been hiding away in shame, confining yourself to either your bedroom or your office, instructing your assistant to keep the door closed and not to disturb you, secluding yourself from the outside world. Aside from interactions at your work, you haven’t talked to anyone. 

A moment of misjudgment led you to lose everything that you were left with when you lost Wanda. But gradually, even as you were beating yourself up over and over again with the dissolution of your relationship with both Romanovs, Wanda became the only one you can think about. You can't escape her pull, no matter how hard you try. 

Eventually, you devolve into nothing more than a compulsion; a compelling need to see Wanda. Which is what brings you here, with your fist poised to knock on the door. But just before your knuckles make contact with the wooden panel, the door swings open, and Wanda's voice unthinkingly spills into the hallway where you stand.

“–let me ask if the neighbor has some sugar–” Wanda halts dead in her tracks as she comes face to face with you.

The timid smile on your face drops as soon as you realize she's not alone. Behind her, comfortably perched on the couch is Valkyrie.

“Seems like you're already entertained. I'll head out,” Valkyrie proposes, getting up on her feet. “I'll pick up my shirt when you come around for the run next week, sound good?”

Wanda nods in a daze to that, her eyes never leaving you.

"No, I should leave," you counter weakly.

“No, Y/N, please stay,” Wanda implores. “See you later, Val. Thanks for the shoes.”

You stiffen and step aside as Valkyrie moves to gather her belongings. When she finally approaches the door, standing next to you, she tilts her head to murmur a parting sentiment intended for your ears only.

“You’ve got it all wrong. I had a spill on my shirt. Don't let her down this time,” she whispers. 

Her words stun you into silence long after she's left.

“Y/N? Please, come in,” Wanda invites you, her voice trembling slightly. Nodding silently, you step inside.

You regard each other quietly, simply observing one another for what feels like an eternity. This isn’t how you imagined things would go when you thought about coming here this morning. You wanted to see Wanda because you needed to be with her. But now, all you can think about is Wanda and Valkyrie being all over each other.

“It’s been awhile,” Wanda offers, not really sure how to begin as you stay awkwardly near the door–as if you’re strategically placing yourself there in case you decide you want to run. She studies you, attempting to read your expression, to figure out what this could be about. She’s been thinking about the thumb drive that contained the video of her and Vision. Did you finally see it? Did you decide to pay him off?

Or is this about Yelena? Wanda’s been thinking if you came clean to your girlfriend about the kiss, wondering if you've managed to patch things up, and if Yelena has forgiven you.

If you’ve chosen to be with Yelena after all.

“Yeah, Valkyrie was here pretty early, wasn't she?” you state more than ask, a hint of bitterness edging your words. You glance at your watch, adding, “At 6:30 in the morning, no less.”

Wanda furrows her brows at your tone, as though she's on the receiving end of an unfounded accusation.

“She was on her morning run, dropped by to hand over a pair of shoes from her club's sponsor. Nothing more,” she explains.

You snort, "Sounds awfully convenient."

Rather than entertain your skepticism further, Wanda redirects the conversation elsewhere. What you presume about her and Valkyrie is the last of her worries right now.

“Why are you here, Y/N?” Wanda asks, her voice a little unsure. When your eyes meet hers, Wanda sees the signs of sleepless nights and a certain emptiness that paints a clear picture.

You and Yelena are done.

And it's breaking you. Her heart aches, even knowing that you're now, technically, available. She never wanted this for you. And she can't help but feel that she messed up your happiness once again.

“I just... I needed to see you,” you admit with a half-hearted shrug. “Looks like you didn't waste any time though.”

“Valkyrie and I are just friends,” Wanda insists, the edge of her patience beginning to fray.

“You seriously think I'll believe that?” you shoot back.

Wanda heaves a sigh, exasperation seeping into her tone. “Believe whatever you want, Y/N. Doesn't change the truth.”

“She was wearing your shirt.” you highlight, not quite ready to drop the issue.

“She spilled coffee on herself. I gave her a clean one. That's it.”

“And I'm supposed to accept that at face value?” you challenge, an eyebrow arched skeptically in her direction.

“Yes, you are!” Wanda says firmly. “Because it's the truth. I wouldn't lie to you.”

I wouldn't lie to you. Her words reverberate within your skull, playing on repeat like a broken record.

And that's the crux of it, isn't it? You're not sure whether you can still believe her.

“Y/N, please,” Wanda's plea rings out, sounding lost and desperate. She isn't even certain what she's asking for. What she does know is that you're teetering on the edge of a breakdown, still reeling from the pain of your breakup. 

You don’t look like you’re in the right mindset to talk about what you’re going through. About how you both left things. And as much as Wanda wants to figure this out with you, she can’t do anything if you’re not willing to trust her.

“Wouldn’t lie to me?” you repeat, your voice laced with sarcasm and a painful sort of humor. “Alright, let's put that to the test, shall we?”

Wanda's throat tightens. She's unsure where you're heading with this.

“Yelena and I broke up. She left me that same morning,” you start off casually, as if discussing the weather. “Because she deserved better. Because I am, as it turns out, selfish and deceitful, right?”

“No–”

“You said you wouldn’t lie to me.”

Wanda's mouth snaps shut at your words, a sense of finality creeping into her. “...yes,” she admits quietly.

Slowly, you advance towards Wanda, your steps intentional and calculated. She remains rooted in her spot, refusing to back down.

“Do you feel happy that Yelena and I have broken up?” you ask.

Wanda looks hurt by your question. "Y/N, no, of course not–”

Your stoic expression tells her you're not buying it.

“Do you regret our kiss?” you probe, stepping closer, until Wanda finds herself backed against the wall. You lean in, foreheads almost touching, your dark eyes daring her to lie to you.

Wanda takes her time to answer, but when she finally does, her expression is resolute, as though she's trying to prove a point to you. “No, I don’t regret it,” she murmurs, her words a mere breath against your lips. Wanda looks so taken by the hungry look in your eyes that she fails to see what comes next.

The kiss this time is a stark contrast from the last. There’s an edge of danger to it, almost like the kiss that started Wanda’s downfall that culminated in a near-death experience, the kiss that was punishing and every bit of the hatred you harbored for her. 

But there's also a desperation to it–as if you're sinking and this kiss is your lifeline; a frayed, ragged lifeline that could only be the one to pull you back to the surface. 

As Wanda's head hits the wall with a soft thud, a pang of concern breaks through the haze of your fervor. Swiftly, you slide your hand between her head and the hard concrete, cushioning her as the urgency of your kiss escalates. Wanda almost sobs at the subtle tenderness behind your action, the considerate gesture leaving her somewhat taken aback, considering the harsh exchange you'd had just moments before.

No, this is nothing like your previous encounter.

You're not biting down to break skin. Your fingers aren't pressing into her hips hard enough to leave bruises. Your tongue isn't demanding or invasive, it's simply there, matching her rhythm and intensity. Wanda is unable to do anything but moan under you and rub her thighs together to relieve the pressure that’s building there.

Yet, you still don’t let her touch you. You don’t let her fingers venture up your stomach from under your shirt. Instead, you catch her hands, lacing your fingers through hers, and pull her arms above her head. All the while, your lips deftly trace a path down her throat. It’s soft and wet and so utterly delicate–everything Wanda thinks she hasn’t earned.

Nothing prepares her for the moment your hand makes contact with her core, even through the fabric of her shorts. She realizes just how much you’ve been holding back when you cup her forcefully, groaning from the heat and dampness that hits your palm.

If this means what Wanda thinks it means, she doesn’t want it to happen against the wall of her living room.

“Y/N?” she whispers raggedly in your ear, feeling the heel of your hand starting to grind against her clit. 

“Yeah…?” you moan against her heated cheek as your fingers slips beneath her panties and find wet, wiry curls.

“Fuck–” Wanda whimpers at the contact. “B-Bedroom, please.”

Following her lead, you hoist Wanda up and her legs instinctively coil around your waist. She directs you towards her bedroom with verbal cues, realizing you're far too engrossed in lavishing attention on the skin just above her breasts to care about bumping into furniture. Your hand drifts up her back, finding the clasp of her bra and skillfully unfastening it.

And then no words are spoken at all after that.

***

Wanda stirs awake near noon, realizing that she's skipped her therapy appointment. Instinctively, her hands reach out to the area beside her, expecting to feel your warmth. However, she is greeted only by the cool sheets of the bed, the space vacant.

You're gone.

While she had been lost in dreams where she had a second chance at the life she yearned to have with you, you had quietly dressed and slipped out of her apartment, leaving no trace or note behind. You had vanished as silently and swiftly as a dream at daybreak.

Wanda arches her back, mimicking the languid stretch of a cat, the resulting pops of her spine easing the tension more than the action itself. The sex was… phenomenal. She couldn’t think of a better word to describe it.

When a bit of the afterglow wears off, she is haunted by a question: What happens now?

More importantly, are you coming back? Or is this a one-time thing for you?

With a weighty sigh, Wanda allows herself to collapse back onto the mattress. Doubt creeps in as she begins to question whether her decision to let this unfold was the right one. After all, you’ve both been down this path before, sex was not a magic remedy that mended everything. 

What she couldn’t deny, however, is how gentle you were with her. You were making love to her, and nothing could sway Wanda from this belief. It sparks a tiny ray of hope within her that perhaps this time, you're ready to give her another chance.

Maybe, just maybe, you're open to trying again.

Yet, the vacant space next to her feels almost accusatory. Wanda has never been fond of waiting. But it’s the only thing she can do for now.

After all, beggars can’t be choosers.

***

The call from her therapist comes at around nine in the evening. Wanda considers it a little unprofessional, given the late hour, but she supposes that Calliope sees at least a dozen patients a day. Truthfully, she’s been anticipating this call all day, especially after she deliberately skipped her session to–

A soft snore escapes from your half-open mouth, drawing Wanda’s attention momentarily.

–spend time with you. Wanda can’t explain it, but she’s afraid to bring this up to Calliope. And she knows that if she sees Calliope or talks to her, it would open the floodgates and everything will come rushing out before she can stop them.

She's missed two calls now, but the phone in her hand vibrates again and Calliope’s name stares back at her.

Taking a deep breath, Wanda finally picks up.

“Hello, Wanda?”

“Hi,” Wanda replies, aiming to sound cheerful.

Calliope wastes no time getting to the purpose of this call. “You missed this morning’s session. Did something happen?”

Wanda's gaze drifts to you, sleeping soundly, your hair a mess as it spreads out in every direction. The sheets have slid down, exposing your bare back in a manner that makes her want to abandon the call and join you.

“Oh, uh... I just got tied up at the cafe. Sorry for not informing your secretary,” she hastily lies.

“So, everything's okay then?”

“Yes,” Wanda confirms, her eyes never leaving you as she replies honestly this time. Calliope seems satisfied with that and proceeds to book a slot for Wanda two days hence before ending the call.

You open an eye at her lazily, your voice muffled by the pillow as you ask, “Who was it?”

“No one,” Wanda says without batting an eye. “Just a supplier for the coffee shop.”

Your response is a drowsy murmur, your face sinking deeper into the pillow as you pursue the lingering traces of Wanda's scent. A smile tugs at Wanda's lips at the innocence of the gesture, despite the fact that you’re very naked under the covers. She hadn’t anticipated she’d see you again so soon, moreso that she’d sleep with you again right away when she does. But you had showed up unannounced, yet again, and casually asked Wanda if she'd eaten dinner already. Wanda had barely gotten the word ‘yes’ out, before you’re urgently reaching out and snatching her into a hungry kiss.

And then it was all lips and touches and her coming into your mouth three times until she had to literally cover herself with her hand just to get you to stop. 

Wanda's cheeks warm as she surrenders to the memory of your fervent reunion from only a few hours prior, but your sleep-laden murmurings, muffled as they are by the pillow your face is buried in, yank her back to the present. She chuckles lightly and perches herself at the edge of the bed, drawing a line along your back with her fingertips, raising goosebumps along the path.

"Can you repeat that?" she prompts, massaging your neck.

You lift your head slightly, your eyelids still heavy with sleep. “I said–do you need me to go?”

Wanda shakes her head, even though you can't see her. “Let’s just sleep,” she whispers.

Wanda gets up to remove her shirt over her head. Then, she slides back under the sheets and curls up against you. She presses her bare body to your back, fitting herself perfectly against your shape. Your warmth seeps into her, filling the cold spots that your absence had left behind.

Wanda notes that this is the first time you’re willing to stay since before you found out she cheated on you. She closes her eyes and allows herself to drift away. If you’re staying, then there's an opportunity to talk about this tomorrow.

***

Leaving a slumbering Wanda behind is not easy. You have to gingerly disentangle yourself from her grip to avoid waking her up. Initially, sleeping with Wanda was not part of your plan, but seeing her with Valkyrie had stirred a sense of jealousy within you that led to a powerful desire to claim Wanda as yours.

And so it kept happening, again and again–like a drug you just couldn't shake off.

You haven't really thought about what it all means. To be honest, you've been actively avoiding it. A week of overthinking has left you stuck at a dead-end, feeling numb and desperate to feel something, anything at all.

And in all this, Wanda is the only one who seems to fill the void, the only one who doesn't make you feel so alone.

***

“Dr. Williams?” Pietro says hesitantly as he picks up the call.

“Hi, Pietro. I hope I'm not catching you at a bad time,” comes Calliope's voice, clear and loud.

“No, I was just–did we have a scheduled meeting that slipped my mind?” he inquires, wondering about the suddenness of this call. 

“We didn't,” Calliope assures him. “I'm actually calling about Wanda. Have you had a chance to speak with her recently?”

Pietro doesn’t like the sound of this. “No, I haven’t. Is she okay?”

“She missed her appointment this morning without notice. It’s the second time in a row. And I just got off the phone with her… she was deflective.”

“I'll check in with her,” Pietro promptly assures, before adding more softly, “Should I be worried?”

“She has agreed to meet me on Tuesday,” Calliope replies, deftly skirting around his question. “So, it may not be a pressing matter. I apologize for disturbing you.”

“No problem at all, Dr. Williams. Feel free to call anytime.”

As the call ends, Pietro is left alone with his thoughts. His mind is whirring with worry for Wanda, and he sits there for a moment, lost in thought. With a sigh, he places his phone back on the coffee table, a frown etching itself onto his face.

Feeling restless, he picks up his phone again, fingers swiping the screen with a certain degree of nervousness. His gallery opens up, a collection of countless memories frozen in pixels. He scrolls through it, stopping at a particular picture that still haunts him.

It's a hard image to look at, a memory of a particularly painful day. But he keeps it, just in case he needs it, a ghost hiding in his phone.

He knows, if push comes to shove, he has this to fall back on.

Taglist: @blackluthxr | @esposadejoyhuerta | @secretbackrooms | @justgotlizzied , @casquinhaa | @marvelwomen-simp | @sunsol-22 | @wandanatlov3r | @kyaraderuwez | @justyourwritter69 | @stanolsevans | @aliherreraaa | @diaryoflife| @justagurlwholikes | @lizziesplant | @cowxpoke | @sokovianbaby | @swiftie1-0-1

[igotanidea]

Fixed: Jason Todd x reader

@jasontoddsthickbabe asked me for a story when Jason's girl find out she is pregnant, and once @pinksirensong found it out, supported this idea, so they left me no choice in the matter.

This can be read as part 2 of my ff Broken, since it gives the origins of the problem.

MINORS DNI!

***

Ever since he realized what was bothering her so much to push him away, Jason was doing anything he could to prove that she was the most important person for him.

Sure, it was hard, but he could never insist on having kids or parting ways with his love just because of something she had zero influence on.  Obviously he supported her through the therapy and treatment which was a bitch. All those medicines and hormones made her mood swing, her weight go up and her hair fall. She hated herself. She hated what it was doing to her body and how unattractive she felt.

One night, when Jason came back from patrol, he found her in the bathroom, crying on the floor, squeezed in the corner between the toilet and the sink sobbing uncontrollably.

“Baby?” without second of hesitation he dropped down on his knees next to her, grabbing her face in his large, still gloved hands “Baby, look at me, what happened?”

“I’m hideous” she cried “I’m fat and ugly and I feel like crying all the time. Why isn’t is working Jace? It’s just so unfair, you know?” she hiccupped, looking as broken as his heart was becoming at the moment “there are so many people who don’t want kids. At all. And never care about them…..”

“Don’t I know that…” he muttered

“Oh my god! I’m sorry, Jace, I’m so sorry. I never should have brought that up. Stupid me, I’m so sorry!” she hid face in hands, unable to look him in the eyes after saying thing like that.

“Stop saying you’re sorry” he put an arm around her waist, pulling her in, so she wouldn’t lean on the cold tiles on the wall “You did not say a thing wrong. Just facts. And it is unfair. And I wish it wasn’t, cause if there’s anyone who deserves good things in life it’s you.” closing his eyes he kissed top of her head.

“You too….” She mumbled incoherently, still sobbing and shaking, just a little bit less “listen Jace, I won’t hold it against you if you want to back out….”

“We’ve been through this, babe. I already told you I only want you. ”

“I know, but I’m being a menace because of the treatment. A challenge. A torment. It’s ok if you don’t….”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” He hissed and leaned in to kiss her.

To say it was fiery would be an understatement.

I mean, consider the fact he came back from patrolling, the adrenaline was still bubbling up in his veins and it seemed like putting all the energy and attention on her would be good for both Jason and his girl.

“Jason…..” she whined feeling how hard he was getting “not here…. Not like this…”

“Right.” Only now he realized he was about to fuck her on the bathroom floor next to the pot. It was definitely far from the good and romantic environment and not an efficient way to lift her mood up. Pushing her into the cold floor wouldn’t work for his benefit. So instead of laying her down, he did quite the opposite picking her up in his arms and carrying her towards the bed. “I’m gonna treat you right, Y/N.” his lips came back onto hers, slowly moving down, making her shudder in anticipation. “Fuck, you always make me want you. So bad, baby. So fucking bad….”

“Even with my gross look?”

“Shut up.” His voice became dark and that commanding tone made her pussy throb and ache for him. God, that was truly pathetic how needy and craving she was of his touch. Another side effect of all those pills. “You will shut up and do exactly what I tell you. Nod If you understand.” She nodded too overwhelmed with his body over hers. “Good. Now. You are way too overdressed for my liking, so how about we get rid of those layers?” one move of hand and her sleeping T-shit was gone “much better” he grinned, massaging those perfect, plump breast that came on full display “Mm, I love playing with your tits. All mine for the taking, aren’t they?“

“Jace….” She whined “more, please’ her back arched involuntarily, hips moving up, making it easier for him to pull down her pants. “tell me how you want me…. I’ll be good for you, I promise.”

“That would be first, you tease.” He scoffed remembering all those times she acted like a brat during their lovemaking.

“I’m begging you. I want you too, baby. So bad. So, so bad.” She clawed on his back, getting irritated by the thick layer of his jacket and Red Hood suit “take it off.” Even that desperate tugging on the material did nothing to remove it, since his hands were still on her body, touching every inch of her skin. “I need to feel your skin on mine. Please, Jay….”

“I never said I’ll be good, hm? You pledged that, baby. So give me a reason to listen to you now.”

“Reason?” she moaned feeling his lips kissing under her breast, avoiding the most sensitive part of them, even if her nipples needed his attention as well. It was pure torture and all she could do was hope for the sweet release after. “I’ll give you a reason, damn it!” She wrapped legs around him, still in his clothes and pressed her whole body into him, grinding lightly to create any friction, hands on his face, kissing him with all the passion she had. Which was a lot.

Oh, he was getting hard due to her action, and his groans gave him away. Knowing his impatience and look of pleasure appearing on his face she knew it was a good way to convince him “Come on, baby.” She panted into his ear, hands running through his hair. “You said it yourself, you want me. You want to get home, right? Remember how good it feels? Warm and tight and nice and …..” she moved underneath him even more and finally pushed him past the last line of self-control.

“Ah! Fuck!” he hissed letting go of her body beneath him and tossing the jacket away. “You do act like a brat.” Piece by piece his body armor followed the jacket and more and more of his skin started to show. Fuck he was so perfect.

“But you like it, don’t you…” she smirked, finally able to get hands on his chest and abs, feeling the muscles and warmth of his body. It was so good and so familiar, tracing patterns there, causing his body to flex under her touch, leaving goosebumps everywhere she caressed him.

“Not tonight. I told you. Tonight, you will listen to me. I don’t care if you like it or not.”

“Show me who’s the boss then.” She whispered and fuck, did that turn him on, pants getting uncomfortably tight “someone’s excited?”

“Still talking?” he mocked “I’ll remedy that. I’ll make a mess out of you….” and with such words he dived between her tights finding that one spot that made her moan and writhe and scream his name with panted breath. He knew her body so well it was actually embarrassing. He could have her coming in minutes.

“Jason!” she cried, tears brimming in her eyes “Jace!”

“Keep saying my name” he commanded. “Just keep on doing that. This will remind you that you’re place in under me. Never dominating.”

“I don’t…..” she cried again but before she finished the sentence he pulled back, leaving her high and dry “Jason?” Y/n looked up at his slightly annoyed face.

“Why are you testing my patience, baby?” he grabbed her chin lightly and connected their foreheads. “I’m trying to make you feel good here and you just keep resisting. Do you want to be left high and dry?”

“I got toys, you know….”

“Are. Those. As. Good. As. Me?” he punctuated each word with another short brush of his hardness on her pussy “Can you look me in the eyes and say that?”

“No. No, no. I can’t. Those could never… ah, compare.”

“Than what do you want, love, huh?’ he moved closer and harder to tease her more.

“I want you inside me. I want you to take control. I want you to take me. Now.”

“And what do we say at the end of such sentence?”

“Please….”  

“That’s my good girl.” In a blink of an eye his pants were gone and with how wet she was for him he slid inside her in one fluent movement, bottoming out instantly, stretching her and filling fully. “Isn’t it good?”

“ Yes, Yes, Jason, so good.”

“It’s gonna get better.” He grabbed her legs and put them around his waist, changing the angle and going deeper inside her.

“Stop bragging and just move for fuck’s sake!”

At first he wanted to pull out and leave her. She did not listen to him, again. However, all his self-restraint and self-control started to leave him the second their bodies became one, joint, together. It was not about teasing her or being mean. He wanted her as much as she wanted him, it was just a tad harder to admit it, since he was let down by people in the past. Trust and love and being in need of someone was still something he was learning. But with her? With her, he felt safe. Safe enough to get himself lost in her.

“Fuck. I love you.” he pulled back slightly just to pull back in. And again and again. Each trust faster, harder, stronger, getting them both closer to orgasm. “You’re mine. And I’m yours.  Forever.”

“Yes! Yes!” her nails dig into his back. It was so good. He was so good with pleasuring her. “You are Jason. You are mine and I….ah! So close. Don’t stop.”

“Never. Let go for me babygirl. Now. Let me feel you.”

“Jason!” she screamed loud enough so that neighbors would judge her in the morning and came hard, with literal stars exploding in front of her eyes and he followed equally hard, right after. In fact  took a few minutes for them to ride those highs down and get their breathing and heartbeat back to normal.

“That was….” She started when he pulled out and hugged her close to his chest. “Wow. I don’t think we ever….So intense.”

“ You know I would give you everything, right?’ he looked straight at her. “All I’ve got. Everything.”

“If only I could say the same”  she thought to herself, tighter wrapping arms around him.

*** 

“What the fuck happened?” he almost kicked the door to the hospital reception room. Half an hour ago he received a very disturbing call from Tim, who with shaky voice informed him, that Y/N had some sort of faint-like accident and were taken to the hospital.

“Would you calm down, Jason?”

“How the fuck do you expect me to calm down?! I got questions that someone needs to answer right now or the head will roll and blood will be spilled…..”

“He’s joking.” Tim grinned at one of nurses, who were already picking up the phone, most probably to call security “Just worried about his girl and acting emotional.” The nurse just put it down and walked away as fast as she could have not saying a single word “Calm down, you idiot or I’ll kick your ass.”

“Ha! Good luck with that. It will be the other way round if you don’t tell me where is she? How is she? Why didn’t she call me? Why…. Why did she came with you?”

“ She did not. She actually came alone, but I was listening the police frequency again and they reported someone being taken from some accident.”

“She was in an accident?! I’m gonna kill…..”

“She was not in an accident.”

“….you, Drake. I’m gonna kill you. TALK!” Jason almost grabbed Tim by the collar and almost pressed him to wall, but stopped himself at the last second, his hands itching.

“They were talking about casualties and some of the officers mentioned something about it being the hard day not only for them, but also for the girl next door who was having a meat wagon outside her house. It was happening in Y/N’s area so I just connected the dots and came here. And then I called you.”

Jason sighed deeply.

“Do you know something more? What happened? Why did it happen? Anything?”

“Not yet.  Her doctor told me to wait.” To be honest Tim wasn’t surprised by his brother behavior at all. He would act exactly the same if something were to happen to Bernard. “It’s going to be alright.” He reassured Jason.

“You don’t know that.”

“I… I don’t, but she’s strong. She’s a fighter.”

“Tim. Stop. She’s fragile. She’s delicate. And she’s my one and only. I…. I can’t lose her.”

“You won’t. She would never make it easy on you and leave this way. Not to the one to get rid off this way.”

“Mr. Todd?” one of the nurses emerged from behind the door “You came with miss Y/L/N, right?”

“I did.”

“I can tell you that…..” she started but stopped in the middle of the sentence eyeing Jason who looked like he just came back from hell (which was truly not so far from reality) “and who may you be?” her tone changed into defensive.

“He’s the boyfriend!” Tim cut in, before his brother started causing drama. “He’s worried about her too. Is she alright?”

“Boyfriend, huh?” the nurse scoffed and crossed her arms “I strongly recommend you to behave and take responsibility, young man. She’s in this state because of you.”

“What…. what state?” Jason stuttered

“She can tell you herself, mister. You can go and talk to her. And I got my eyes on you.” she pointed two fingers towards her eyes and then at him, and damn that made him shake and start creating scenarios in his head. Was it that serious? He knew it was probably his fault, since he did not protect her from whatever danger got to her, but still….

“Come on, big guy, move!” Tim pushed him through the door to the padded room where Y/N was laying in the hospital bed. Pale and tired, but with the lightest smile on her face.

“Hi boys.” She greeted both of them, Tim standing back and raising his hand in greeting, Jason rushing to her side, almost ramming the doctor, grabbing her hands and scanning her face, begging for explanation with his eyes since words failed him.

“We’re good here miss Y/N?” the MD made sure it was safe to leave her with those two strangely looking men.

“Sure, doctor. I’ll be fine with them. I’m sure.”

“All right.  I’ll have the prescription ready for you and remember what we talked about. A lot is about to change, dear. I’m really happy for you.”

“Thank you, doctor.” She smiled a bit and he left.

“Happy for you?” Jason frowned “Correct me if I’m wrong but you’re in a hospital. Since when is that a reason to be happy?”

“Y/N” Tim smiled, detective instincts kicking in “Are you…?”

“SHSH! Quiet, Tim! Let him figure this out by himself!”

“Figure what out?”

“’Jason. don’t freak out…” Y/N took his hand in hers and slowly, gently, lead it onto her belly, keeping it there. Then it dawned on him.

“Are you….” he gulped “pregnant?”

“I am….” Tears started falling from her eyes

“With my kid?” Jason stuttered, the reality slowly catching him up. Y/n was pregnant. His girl was pregnant! He was going to have a kid!

“And whose else you dumbass?!” Tim could not hold back a comment on Y/N behalf and she smiled at him in silent thanks that she didn’t have to be the one to roar Jason up.

“We’re going to have a kid. I’m going to be a dad.”

“Are you happy?” she asked quietly

“Am I….? Fuck, I’m the happiest man in the universe. And it’s all thanks to you. I’m gonna take care of everything, I promise. You won’t have to lift a finger. Do we know if it’s a boy or a girl? Is he or she all right? Healthy? Do you need any special meds to keep yourself safe and healthy during the pregnancy? What furniture do we need? Or toys? Do you think a giant teddy bear would be ok?”

“Jason” she cupped his cheek and giggled a bit “Calm down, it’s only the beginning .We can handle everything one step at time baby.”

“And I’ll be with you every step of the way. And later.” He raised her hands and kissed her knuckles “I love you, baby. You and the kid.”

“Do you want me to….” a soft voice came from behind

“GET OUT DRAKE! I’m talking to the mother of my child!”

“It’s gonna be nine long months…” Tim muttered walking out the door and rubbing his forehead knowing well enough that during that term Jason will be more annoying and abnormal than usual.

[daisyblog]

Mrs Burton

Our Story Masterlist Summary: YN and Harry's reaction to Lottie and Lewis getting engaged.

Based on this request

YN was four when her little sister Lottie was born. She can remember their Dad taking her and Louis to the hospital to see their Mum after she had given birth. Lottie was wearing a white onesie and hat on her small head as their Mum cuddled her in her arms.

The two girls were typical sisters growing up. They argued like crazy but loved each other deeply. They had been each others support through the good and bad times. They truly had an amazing bond.

YN’s had the pleasure of watching her little sister become a Mum to her beautiful baby boy, and like everyone else could see that since Lucky was born, Lottie’s smile has only grown bigger. Her light had been turned back on.

From Lottie and Lewis’ instagram story’s that morning, YN knew Lewis had surprised Lottie with a weekend trip to Paris. How romantic! She wished the little family a fun weekend and didn’t give it a second thought.

YN and Harry lived a wild life and were tucked up in bed on a Friday night, Teddy cuddled at the bottom, with Friends playing on the tv. It wasn’t unusual for one of YN’s siblings to FaceTime her so when Lottie’s name popped up on her phone, neither YN or Harry were shocked.

Accepting the call and holding her phone in front of her, YN spoke “Hey Lotts!”.

Lottie didn’t say any words, but her face wore a beaming smile that made her cheeks hurt and she held her left hand up, to display the new diamond that sat on her finger.

The sparkle of the diamond shocked YN and an excited scream left her mouth as she sat up from the position. “AHHH!…ARE YOU FOOKIN’ SERIOUS?!”.

Lottie nodded with just as much excitement. “I’m getting married”.

“Aww Lotts…I’m so happy for you…congratulations babe”.

Harry managed to interrupt to congratulate the couple. “Congratulations Lottie…tell Lewis I said congratulations too”.

“Thanks Harry”.

After saying goodbye to Lottie and blowing a kiss to Lucky through the phone and wishing them an amazing weekend of celebrations, YN began to feel so emotional.

Noticing the change, Harry grabbed her hand with his. “Hey..what’s wrong baby?”.

“I’m just so happy for them…Lottie deserves so much happiness”. Tears began to roll down her cheeks.

“I’m starting to get worried at how quickly your emotions are changing lately”. Harry attempted to make a joke, at how he had noticed YN was more emotional than normal lately.

For the rest of the evening, YN stayed cuddled up to Harry’s chest as she watched Lottie’s engagement video on repeat with tears running down her cheeks and onto Harry’s skin. However, Harry couldn’t help but think there was something more to why YN was extra emotional. 

YN's Instagram Story

Tag List: (let me know if you would like to be added) @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats @harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @indierockgirrl @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour @bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @jerseygirlinca @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @buckybarnessimpp @indierockgirrl

[miguelswifey04]

Hii!! I live ur fiction sm and I was wondering if we could have a Miguel x Fem Reader who is Badass like him and usually cool and collected and maybe sometimes quiet and shy? But when she is pissed she is really scary like one day on a mission she full on pulls a miguel and miles situation (NOT CRAWLING ON ALL FOURS THO LMAO)

And she starts fighting ruthlessly and miguel is super proud but kinda scared bc he's worried she is gonna kill someone. Ty for ur time hope this isn't too much! ❤

it’s not too much, don’t worry my love <33 love this idea a lot :)

miguel o’hara x badass fem! spider! reader

miguel always admired your calm and collected nature. your ability to remain level-headed during missions was something he truly respected. but there was another side to you that he had witnessed only a few times—a side that unleashed a fierce and ruthless fighter.

one day, as the two of you embarked on a mission together, something triggered you, igniting a fire within. your usually reserved demeanor transformed, and miguel couldn't help but be in awe of the intensity emanating from you.

as you fought, your movements became fluid, each strike precise and calculated. your eyes blazed with a raw determination, and the once calm and collected facade was shattered. you unleashed your full power, not holding back an ounce of your strength.

miguel watched with a mix of awe and concern. he had never seen you so ferocious, so unyielding. your actions mirrored his own, the spirit of a true fighter coursing through your veins. as your blows landed with deadly accuracy, miguel couldn't help but feel a twinge of worry. while he was proud of your strength, a part of him feared the potential consequences of your ruthlessness.

the battle raged on, and with each passing moment, the intensity grew. miguel could see the fear in the eyes of your opponents, a primal realization that they were facing a force far greater than they had anticipated. but amidst that fear, there was also a glimmer of admiration for your power.

finally, the chaos subsided, and you stood amidst the defeated enemies, your chest heaving with exertion. miguel approached you cautiously, his eyes reflecting a mixture of pride and trepidation. “wow…," he said, his voice laced with a mixture of awe and concern. "that was…intense. you were incredible out there. but i have to admit, i’m a little worried about the level of ferocity you displayed. you seemed ready to go all the way."

you took a deep breath, your gaze fixated on the ground. "i’m sorry, miguel. i just…i couldn't contain myself. something inside of me snapped," you admitted, your voice tinged with a hint of regret. miguel placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, his touch grounding you. "i understand. we all have those moments. but remember, there's a line we shouldn't cross. we fight to protect, not to cause unnecessary harm."

you nodded, appreciating his words of wisdom. "you’re right, miguel. i’ll be more mindful next time. it’s just that sometimes, the rage inside me becomes overwhelming. i need to learn to control it better." he smiled gently, his love for you evident in his eyes. "we’ll work on it together. i know you have incredible strength, and i believe in your ability to channel it for the greater good. just remember, you don't have to fight alone. we’re a team, and we'll face any challenge together, no matter what."

with that, miguel pulled you into a warm embrace, reaffirming the unbreakable bond between you. as you held each other, you found solace in the fact that even in moments of darkness and rage, love and support would always guide you back to the path of balance and compassion.

tags 🏷️!! @kairiscorner @astro1bloom @obi-mom-kenobi @emiemiemiii @sabcandoit @meeom

[twistnet]

wishing it was me, instead of her [ robin buckley ]

⋯ SUMMARY ; watching robin get ready for a date that wasn’t with you, hurt a lot more than you could have ever expected

⋯ WARNINGS ; female!reader, angst [ feelings of unrequited loved + crying ], general fluff [ hurt//comfort, best friends to lovers + kisses ] + mature language

you watched as robin dug through her closet, attempting to find something presentable to wear to her date with vicky tonight -- the girl having plucked up the courage to finally ask her out after the crazy ends regarding the upside down and vecna. leading robin to take the ‘no time like the present’ saying to heart, before spontaneously asking vicky out on a date.

vicky had immediately said yes, and you couldn’t blame her. any girl would be lucky to have the robin buckley ask them out on a date -- however, you realize you may be slightly biased toward that statement. though, it seemed the only person who was able to see through your faked enthusiasm after robin had came bursting into family radio with her news, was steve. who shot you a look of pity after you had excused yourself to finish setting up the displays.

he knew of your affections toward your shared friend, evident by the way your eyes would brighten whenever she was near you, the way you seemed to hold on to each word that came out of her mouth, and the way you lightly frowned whenever vicky was brought into a conversation. he had told you many times to take the chance and ask robin out yourself. but, with the way robin seemed to pin over a girl she shared most of her time with, you didn’t want to ruin a friendship over feelings she obviously didn’t share with you.

“hey!” robin calls your name, waving her hand in front of your zoned-out face before holding up a t-shirt, “is this... too much?” she questions, face scrunching up lightly as she waits patiently for your advice. you shake your head, heat rushing to your cheeks out of embarrassment, “where are the two of you going again?”

robin groans, hands dropping to her sides as her head tilts back in frustration, “the bowling alley? we’ve only talked about this like... twenty-seven times.” she states, looking over the shirt once more with a displeased face before hanging it back into her closet.

“i wouldn’t say it was that many times...” you trail off, racking your brain as you try to remember if that was truly the exact number as the girl in front of you sighed, “uh, it’s just about! i mean, most of the times i’ve had to remind you was when you kept trying to make plans for today. it got really annoying.”

you wince slightly at her harsh words, uttering out a quick apology before robin winces herself and drops to her knees in front of you, “no, i’m sorry. i was mean. it’s just, this is a really big deal for me. the girl of my literal dreams is going out with me tonight and i want this to be perfect.” the words had sawed through your heart like a knife, and while you forced a smile to show your support, nothing had hurt more than in that moment.

however, you bit through the pain, helping robin find something suitable to wear and rushing out of her house the second she agreed on the outfit choice. an action she had found weird and concerning, but had turned her focus back toward getting ready for her date.

a knock on steve’s door caused him to just in his seat, nearly spilling the popcorn in his lap as the background of a horror movie played. he cursed to himself, standing from the couch before walking over to the door.

“what do you want - ?” he began, stopping when he finally caught sight of you, and your tear-stained cheeks as you swallowed back a sob, “hey, hey, hey! what happened?” steve questioned, face falling as you practically dissolved into tears, wrapping your arms around his waist as you cried int his chest. he was quick to pull you inside, never once letting go as you explained how much you had fucked up through heavy tears.

and after getting you seated on the couch with a snack and some water, steve listened intently as you explained everything -- how you had wished that you had told robin of your feelings for her earlier which would have allowed you to avoid this heartbreak. quoting her ‘girl of my literal dreams’ which only sent you into another round of tears.

after some soft reassurances, steve offered to let you spend the night. giving you the opinion of the couch or his bed, to which you stated you would just take the couch. the two of you stayed up a little later, finishing out the movie he had on before retiring for the night.

steve, once again, waking up to the sound of someone knocking at his front door and groggily making his way towards the door -- careful to not wake you on his way. the door opened to reveal robin, bright smile plastered on her face as she screamed excitingly before steve quickly shh’d her, “who pissed in your frosted flakes this morning?” robin bit out, until steve gestured to where you laid on the couch still asleep.

“what is she doing here?” the girl questioned almost sadly, now understanding why you didn’t answer when she had stopped by your house first. and after sparing a glance back towards you, steve ushered robin back out to the porch before closing the door behind him, “she came over last night. in tears might i add, because you went on your date with vicky.”

robin’s eyes narrowed at her older friend, “why was she upset that i was going on a date with vicky? you know, she could have told me that and we cold have just talked it over...” then steve groaned, cutting her off as he fisted a few tuffs of hair in his hands, “robin, for someone so smart, you are literally the dumbest person when it comes to seeing things right in front of you. she’s been in love with you for years. hell! you’ve been in love with her for years! i had been working to help her gather the courage to ask you out for months, and then you came in to family video and said you had gotten a date with vicky!”

“she still could have told me!” she yelled almost exasperated, before steve shook his head, “robin! it had discouraged her! would you have still asked her out if you had been in the same predicament?” the silence that followed had answered steve’s question better than any words could have.

“look, i know you really like this vicky girl, but i almost know you love your best friend -- who’s spent the night crying on my couch because she couldn’t handle the fact that the girl she loved was with someone else.” he sighed softly, pinching the bridge of his nose, “so, please. now is your chance to get what you want. what you truly want.” with that, he pushed the door open, gesturing for her to enter. and with a deep breath, robin slid into steve’s apartment.

her eyes softening at your curled up form on the couch, blanket tucked up under you chin as she kneeled down beside you, gently brushing the pads of her fingers against your cheeks.

you eyes fluttered open at the action, blinking in surprise at the sight of robin seated in front of you with a dopey grin, “hey, sleeping beauty.” she utters softly before casting her eyes down to where her hands fiddle together in her lap, “you know, i want on that date with vicky. and it was great, she was really cool to talk to and we had a great conversation. but i realized halfway through that while this girl was someone who i really liked, she was nowhere compared to the girl i had practically fallen in love with.”

“robin - “ you utter out before she cuts you off with a shake of you head, “no, please let me finish. i went on a date with her because i kept telling myself that you would never fall for someone like me. i was your best friend, and that just doesn’t happen like it does in those romantic movies we watch. and i guess, i got discouraged at the idea that you could never love me.”

“but then hearing that you cried all night because you were going to tell me you had feelings for me, but that i ruined it because i decided to go on a date with vicky -- it broke my heart, and i wish i could go back and let you ask me out like you had wanted to.”

“would you say yes now?” you question, cutting through the long silence as her head snaps up to yours in question, “if i asked you now, would you say yes now?” you repeat again, looking into her hopeful eyes as she nods, “i would, i would say yes a million times. ask me, please...” 

with a deep breath, “robin, i’ve been in love with you for years, would you like to go to dinner with me next weekend?” lips splitting into a smile as she nods her head rapidly, “yes, a million times yes.”

you lean forward, pressing your lips against hers in a soft kiss, a few tears slipping from your eyes as her hands reach up to cup your cheeks, holding you in place as she returns the kiss. the pads of her thumbs gently brushing away the tears until the two of you are interrupted, “that’s great. but if you’re gonna do that, please don’t do it on my couch. i sit there.” steve utters from the doorway, making a disgusted face as the two of you turn toward him with narrowed eyes.

he raises his hands in surrender, muttering something under his breath before moving towards the kitchen to make some breakfast -- knowing either one of you is going to be making a comment about it in the next ten minutes. but for now, you’re much to focused on the fact the girl of your dreams agreed to go on a date with you. breakfast could wait just a little longer.

blog navigation ⇢ [ stranger things masterlist ]

[davnittbraes]

Hi Davnitt!

I have come to your ask box today with 3 Marcus Pikes and I desperately need to know which one you like the best and why…

Or

Or

Thanks in advance for the essay you are about to write 😉😘

Me?? An essay??

My friend, I really don’t know why you’re under the impression that I wouldn’t simply respond to this lovely ask with a straightforward and succinct answer, that just doesn’t sound like me AT ALL.

So anyways -

In this essay I will demonstrate which of the three Marcus gifs submitted I like best and why.

In the first gif, we have post-Teresa Marcus, still carrying the weight of a broken heart while trying to put his life back together. See the sad puppy dog eyes? The nervous smile? That delectable beard isn’t for an undercover job, as he so claims. It’s obvious Poor Bébé is grasping at anything in his life that he can control, any way he can alter the present to be different than the future he dreamed of with her that he now realizes will never come to fruition.

And yet, as we know, Marcus is resilient, unable to stay down for long. There’s a glimpse of it in his gaze, the unwavering confidence that is already guiding him toward realizing the truth - that Teresa was an uninteresting, immature woman with sociopathic tendencies.

Also, that NECK omg I just wanna BITE it nom nom nom and the SMILE??? My heart 🥰🥰🥰

The second gif -

*pauses to physically and emotionally recover from Marcus Pike in a white t-shirt*

- gives us a slightly defensive Marcus, one who is confronted with a perceived threat to his happiness (aka the man he obviously suspects his girlfriend is in love with) and a particularly inspired choice of camera angle where the viewer is subjected to the very same broad chest and shoulders that have so many of us shifting in our seats.

Though on the surface he is displaying his typical politeness, there’s an underlying general aura of “back the fuck away from my girl” that, for those of us who find the idea of him metaphorically growling at anyone who might steal us away attractive (re: me) demands multiple replays of this particular gif.

Plus his hair is so fluffy here like it’s just begging for fingers to run through it and grip and pull -

Ahem okay anyways MOVING ON.

The last gif submitted for consideration is the essential Marcus Pike gif. Do I have a source to support this argument? Yes. Myself. Fight me.

The gentle gaze that radiates sincerity, the clearly and firmly stated reassurance that he is patient, forgiving, and will be ready whenever she is? His heart isn’t just on his sleeve, it’s in his eyes as he looks at her.

This is my favourite Marcus gif, ever. Not only because of the points stated above, but because this gif ultimately inspired my I’m Here series. I wanted to capture the essence of this gif and distill it in my own hurts and pains and flaws and see if the result was anything meaningful.

But when I went to write the first part of the series, I thought - my Marcus has lived so much since this gif. He’s been through heartbreak and betrayal, made rash decisions and put too much of himself in other people’s hands.

In my series, he’s worked through all of that in therapy, learned how to hold relationships without demanding everything from the other person - and himself - all at once, and how to find the validation he seeks in himself, not others. He’s no longer obsessed with obtaining his perception of a perfect life, focused so determinedly on the future that he misses the importance of the present.

I’m Here Marcus is grounded, centred in the moment. He knows what he truly wants, and that is a partner who will walk side by side with him along whatever path life lays out.

So, where once he said “I’ll be here,” implying he will wait for when she decides to come to him, now he says “I am here. For you. Be here with me, now.”

In conclusion, though all submissions resulted in me staring at gifs for much longer than is healthy, the third is my favourite 😊

And if you’ve read this far, I’d like you to know that you’ve read approximately 600 words of deranged rambling about a minor character in an objectively terrible television show. Do what you will with that information.

Thank you for the ask, my darling Katie 🐙

[satansapostle6]

Lovers and Liars | Draco Malfoy

Draco Malfoy and Theodore Nott, both determined and resourceful from reputable houses, find themselves at odds in the name of love.

Warning: Mature themes/language. Violence. Sexual content.

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven: The Shadows

Lorelei Morrigan and Theodore Nott were careful. They stuck close together, their support reinforcing their bond like two pillars. They held their secrets close and trusted no one but each other. Everyone knew they would be a difficult pair to infiltrate or take down. Both of them had made a decent amount of enemies, now including Pansy Parkinson Draco Malfoy.

Both of them wanted desperately to tear Lorelei and Theo apart, albeit for two very different reasons. Theo knew this, and kept Lorelei as close to him as he possibly could. Nothing would take her from him. Theodore only cared about two things; glory, and Lorelei, although not necessarily in that order.

The two of them were keen on finding away to isolate Alastor Moody, or perhaps ‘Alastor Moody’, as they tried to determine whether he truly was Mad Eye Moody or not. They and Lorelei watched him closely, keeping their investigation of their current Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher as clandestine as possible.

But of course, one person in particular was hell bent on foiling their plans, or specifically Theo Nott’s plans. Draco Malfoy was slowly beginning to hate Theo. He had secretly resented him ever since he became Professor Snape’s real favorite of his Slytherin students their first year, and he began to hate him even more when he found out that Theodore was dating Lorelei Morrigan.

Draco didn’t necessarily have a crush on Lorelei, but he also knew that Lorelei was perhaps one of the generally accepted most beautiful girls in school, and he hated the idea of Theo having her. Draco had been hoping for a while that Lorelei would quickly lose interest and break up with him, but it didn’t seem like that would happen any time soon.

The two of them seemed more content with one another than usual, spending a healthy amount of time together, and displaying a conservative but intriguing amount of affection in public. Seeing them in public was what did it for Draco. He knew that he needed them broken up as soon as possible, and he knew that his only shot at achieving this was with Pansy Parkinson.

Of course, the last thing Draco wanted was to align himself with Pansy on any issue, but he knew that she had more motivation than anyone. Draco was also fully aware of the rumors surrounding him and Pansy, as well as those that claimed Pansy had started her infamous fight with Lorelei over Draco, specifically the attention he hand paid to her.

Draco truthfully wanted nothing to do with Pansy. Sure, maybe a year ago he would’ve been absolutely ecstatic to know for sure that she had feelings for him, but much had happened since then. Upon learning that Pansy not only had a crush on him, but was also simply desperate to win his affection, Draco had realized that she was just crazy. He knew she probably would’ve ended up murdering him if she felt he didn’t love her enough.

So, he had given up on that particular pursuit. He hadn’t really liked any girl much since Pansy, but a few naturally caught his attention here and there. He had to admit, Lorelei was one of the few girls at Hogwarts who could genuinely bring an entire room to a halt; she was the true queen bee of the exclusive high society that was Slytherin house.

“Going somewhere, Lorelei?”

Lorelei stopped in the hall. She had been granted permission by Professor Snape to use the restroom during class. How Draco had managed to be granted the same permission, she had no idea.

“The bathroom,” she told him. “Are you coming with me?” she asked in a sarcastic tone.

Draco smiled. “Well. Didn’t think the bathroom was where it’d happen, but I’m up for anything,” he offered.

“I’m sure you are,” she looked at him with pity.

“It doesn’t matter what you say,” the blond told her, taking a step forward. “This is going to happen, you know. Why fight it?”

“Shall I call for Professor Snape and tell him you’re trying to follow me into the girls’ bathroom, and quoting a rapist?” Lorelei questioned.

“Shall I let your boyfriend know you’ve got eyes for someone else?” Draco said quietly, trying to use his slight height advantage against her.

“Do you hear yourself when you speak?” she scoffed, genuinely curious.

She regarded him with no interest, seeing straight through his arrogant charm and soft eyes. It infuriated him, and he needed her to know it.

“You’re funny,” Draco murmured, annoying her further as he brushed back a strand of her red hair.

“Your breath smells,” Lorelei retorted.

“Care to fix it?” he persisted humorously.

“You think you’re so clever,” she realized in awe.

“I am so clever,” Malfoy stated confidently.

“If that were true, then why are you the one with no girlfriend?” Lorelei wondered, before making her way down the corridor.

Draco’s mouth curled into an unpleasant sneer, determined to make her eat her words. He knew that if he wanted to drive Lorelei into his arms, he had to get creative. He had to do the unthinkable, and utilize the one person he knew would do anything just for him to look at her.

*****

After their classes had let out for the day, Lorelei and Theo had found themselves sitting on a bench outside of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, plotting aimlessly as they tried to find the most viable solution to their problem.

“When do you think he’s most vulnerable?” Theo asked her.

“He’s almost always alone,” Lorelei thought. “But he’s almost always around others. Watching,” she answered:

“Let’s think. When is he not?” Theodore asked himself aloud.

“Office hours,” Lorelei suggested. “He takes a decent interest in students for someone who’s so against, well, everything.”

“We could go into his office after someone leaves,” Theo considered.

“But then what?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” he admitted. “He might not be Alastor Moody the auror, but I’m sure two fourth years don’t stand much of a chance against him, even with the element of surprise.”

“Then we’ll just have to make sure we have it,” Lorelei said, a gleam of mischief in her eyes.

*****

After the next Defense Against the Dark Arts class the Slytherin fourth years had, Lorelei Morrigan entered Professor Moody’s office for her one on one appointment as he looked up, not seeming surprised at all to see her.

“Morrigan,” he said in his rough voice. “Sit.”

Lorelei took her seat across from him as she looked around his dark, somewhat cluttered office. She was alerted by a loud sound that came from a locked trunk in the corner, staring at it intently. No way that could have been the real Alastor Moody. Surely it couldn’t have been, even if this man wasn’t Alastor Moody. No one was that reckless. No one was that stupid.

“You’d best not think about what’s in there,” the professor seemed to predict her train of thought. “Nothing would prepare you for the truth.”

She said nothing, not in agreement, but also aware that she had more pressing matters to deal with in regards to Professor Moody.

“What did you want to see me about, Morrigan?” he asked her gruffly.

Lorelei didn’t hesitate to answer.

“There was a spell I wanted to ask you about,” she lied smoothly, “A spell I came across in my recreational reading.”

“Liar,” Moody accused her immediately, a hardened expression on his face.

Lorelei looked at him with curiosity, curious as to the grounds of the accusation.

“Why would I lie?” she questioned, playing her part well.

“How should I know?” he snapped at her. “I just know you are.”

“How?” Lorelei asked him.

“Because. You’re a suspicious person,” Moody concluded. “And you’re looking for a way to get to the Dark Lord.”

Lorelei froze, realizing that he knew far too much, and was far too brazen.

“Relax,” he reassured her, taking a sip from his personal flask. “I’ll give you what you want.”

She looked at him in confusion, thrown off by his nonchalance toward the whole affair.

“You will?”

He nodded. “Yeah. I’ll tell you what,” he proposed, pointing at her as he leaned forward in his seat. “You, and that little minion of yours do what I need to make sure things go as planned… And I’ll get you to him. The Dark Lord.”

“My ‘minion’?” she echoed.

“The Nott boy,” Professor Moody said plainly, as if it were obvious.

“He’s not my minion. He’s my boyfriend.”

“Same difference,” Moody growled. “Just do as I ask, and we both get to bring him back.”

Lorelei narrowed her eyes at him, deciding she’d best pretend she believed that he’d share the glory, at least for now.

“What do you want me to do?” she inquired.

“For now… Find a way to get into Professor Snape’s personal storage. You know where that is, yes?” he asked impatiently.

Lorelei nodded. “Yes.”

“I need you to find something called ‘gillyweed’. As much as you can get. Then bring it to class with you.”

“Done,” she agreed.

“Good. Now get out of my sight,” Moody ordered.

Lorelei paused, unsure of how to proceed. Until she settled on the more direct approach, given the man’s impulsive way of speaking.

“You’re not Alastor Moody. Are you?” she questioned.

He looked up at her slowly, eyes darkening at the question.

“No,” he said finally, looking her in the eyes.

“Who are you?” she asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” he insisted. “You want a piece of advice, Morrigan?”

“Go for it,” she said, remaining in her seat.

Moody paused, turning as he grabbed a large glass from behind him, setting it on the desk in front of him. Lorelei stared as he looked into the glass, watching as strange faces with white eyes stared back at him through it.

“A foe glass?” she realized.

He nodded.

“My father has one,” she said.

“Have you ever gazed upon it?”

Lorelei shook her head. Moody turned the glass around, pushing it towards her.

“You need to know who your enemies are, Morrigan. Such is the difference, between life and death,” he reminded her. “Look into it.”

Lorelei slowly turned her attention to the foe glass, staring hard into it until faces appeared. She stared as her glassy eyes widened and her mouth stood agape.

“I… I don’t understand,” she confessed.

“You need to think bigger!” Moody urged her. “Trust no one. Enemies, those who pose a threat to us, aren’t just born out of hatred, little girl. They come from love, too. Hate you or love you, it doesn’t matter. They’re still there, always. Lurking in the shadows…” he whispered.

Lorelei stared back at him, expression cold as she stood.

*****

Theo and Lorelei sat quiet in History of Magic, both collectively brooding as they silently intimidated as usual. They got up and left class together once it was time, their steps almost in line with one another. They left as one, acting and thinking as one entity. They continued down the corridor together, intending on retreating back to the common room.

This was, of course, until they were stopped by a considerable distraction.

“Lorelei?”

She and Theo stopped, turning to see who was behind them. Lorelei was just as surprised as Theo was to see it was Harry Potter who spoke.

“Harry?” she questioned incredulously.

He looked down at his feet timidly.

“Do you think we can talk?” he asked hopefully.

Lorelei looked up at Theo, silently nodding as he nodded back and disappeared, giving them space before Lorelei quickly led Harry away from the others in the hall.

“What is it?” she questioned worriedly, not understanding.

“Nothing, I just… Wanted to talk to you,” Harry Potter replied awkwardly.

“Alright…”

“We haven’t talked since under the stands last year…” Harry began.

“Right,” Lorelei murmured.

“I, um… I don’t mean to make things awkward, but… That meant a lot to me, honestly. What happened between us,” Harry told her.

She smiled sympathetically. “It meant something to me, too.”

Harry studied her, fear in his eyes as he continued.

“I… I think I still like you, Lorelei.”

She was truly thrown by this, confused as to why he was sharing this.

“Harry…”

He said nothing, waiting patiently.

“I’m with Theo. I’m sorry, but I don’t feel the same way.”

“But, I thought you did,” he said, seeming genuinely shocked.

“Why?” she questioned.

“Well… Pansy Parkinson told me so,” he replied.

Lorelei’s face fell in anger as she suddenly understood what was happening.

*****

“That was her attempt to break us up?!” Theo scoffed as he sat on his bed, listening.

She nodded. “It’s ridiculous!”

“I’ll say. Even for Pansy, this is off!” he said in agreement.

“I just don’t understand, what possessed her!” Lorelei shook her head.

”Who knows?” Theo sighed exhaustedly, flopping back onto the bed.

Lorelei remained standing, thinking as she paced back and forth about the room.

-

Chapter Eight

[gravity-falls-daily]

TWO THINGS FROM TODAY’S EPISODE:

(Note: Thing One is so long I’m sending Thing Two as a second ask because the tonal whiplash from the two things I noticed when watching the episode today would be horrendous)

Thing One:

Holy smokes- I forgot how this episode really dove into the issue of when a girl can’t say no to a guy despite being uncomfortable. I’ve been in Mabel’s situation many times, and needless to say that story is incredibly personal to me.

But also, like, the idea that Mabel, OUR Mabel, the one that fell for several guys in the span of just a few days of being in Gravity Falls, knew for a fact she wanted to only be friends with Gideon. If she wanted to fall for Gideon, she totally could’ve.

But Mabel had her priorities set, and Gideon decided to take advantage her using the fact that he was a prominent public figure. I mean, for crying out loud, he gets the first date by asking for just one to give him a chance. He gets the second one by asking in front of people in a very busy, fancy restaurant. He then gets the third one by showing an elaborate display of affection with fireworks.

Gideon knows how to manipulate people. He even manipulates his own father… like when he yells “I can buy and sell you, old man!” and that’s seen as a valid argument for Bud. Then, there’s the other time where a whole contract between two whole adults is torn up because the child is throwing a tantrum over losing Mabel.

And that’s in THIS EPISODE ALONE.

We also get to see Dipper being the world’s best twin brother ever. He at first doesn’t comment on Mabel having a friend, because who is he to butt into who Mabel wants to hang out with, but when she brings up the date, Dipper casually says that, as a guy, Gideon was going to fall in love with her. He was being upfront and honest, like Dipper does. Then, when Mabel said she wanted to say no later that night, Dipper advises her on how she should just say no. And lastly, when Dipper realizes Mabel couldn’t do it on her own, he offers to do it for her. It was, like, the perfect way for Dipper to handle things.

If Dipper had taken the relationship into his own hands at any point, it would’ve played out like how Gideon saw it- that Dipper was simply getting in between them and that Dipper was being too controlling over Mabel. Instead, Dipper tells Mabel what could happen, advises Mabel on how to handle it, LETS her have a chance to do it herself, and asked to step in when Mabel was distressed.

Good for Mabel for gaining the confidence at the end, but I’m also unbelievably happy with how Dipper supported Mabel throughout the whole relationship.

this is SUCH a good read on mabel & gideon's dynamic and the way dipper supports mabel :] i don't understand the people that say shit about mabel taking advantage of dipper sometimes tbh. like they're siblings, dawg. siblings don't always agree but that doesn't mean they don't care about each other!! this episode is such a good example of the ways in which they care about each other, both with dipper doing his best to help in the beginning and then mabel helping out at the end... truly the siblings of all time <3

[fangirlies]

Introducing Xavier to your family

*head-cannon*

Small authors note: Besties! I’ve missed you all so much. The continued support and love for my writings don’t go unnoticed and I’m insanely thankful for it all. Kisses to you all!

Although Xavier didn't show it, you could see he was nervous to meet your family. Finally, winter break had arrived, and he had no intention of returning to his empty house; you were his home now,so where ever you were-he’s there beside you.

“Black tie or the red one? Red right? Because, well, it’s Christmas. Unless you think it’s too much. It’s too much, right?” He was acting so ridiculously, and you chuckled at how out of character it was for him.

“Why are you laughing at me? This is no laughing matter. I want to leave a good impression” an anxious expression spreading across your lovers face.

“Yes because my parents will absolutely despise you because you decided to go with a red tie, Xay.” You joked leaving a kiss on his nose and pairing his button-down shirt with a red tie.

His leg continued to bounce the entire distance to your family's home. When you put your hand on his bouncing leg to soothe his nerves, he looked at you and smiled slightly.

The "only five minutes" visit to your neighborhood flower shop took twenty minutes. Xavier was having trouble deciding which bouquet to get your mother. "Babe, how do you not know what flowers she likes despite spending your entire life with her? Roses? Tulips? the Orchid?” He was clearly getting angry with your urge to chuckle when he said, "You're no help.” It was amusing to see how serious he was taking this.

After settling for a beautiful purple Orchid, you left the shop. He cared a lot about making a good impression, which was endearing.

You will never forget the final second before arriving at your door. He was fidgeting with his tie and running his fingers through his long brown hair. His uneven breathing was obvious. In an effort to avoid making him more anxious, you refrained from laughing.

“Your parents' names are y/m/n and y/d/n, and you have two older siblings named y/s/n and y/s/n.” He was amazed at his memory for all of their names, which seemed to come naturally to him despite having practiced them for days. When his eyes caught yours, he was puzzled by the look on your face. “What? What do I have on my face?”

“Nothing. I just love you so much. Did you realize that?” You spoke to him while caressing his cheek. He wasn't as stiff anymore, so you could tell that your remarks had made him more relaxed. He grinned at you before kissing you on the lips.

Your family undoubtedly answered the door within a few minutes of you ringing the doorbell. The two of you coming here for Christmas made them truly happy.

“Orchids! My favorite flowers!” Your mother gave him a hug and said, "Thank you so much Xavier. I love it” As your family welcomed him, you could see Xavier's nerves starting to fade. They would adore him almost as much as you did, you knew.

“Excellent red tie, Xavier. Ya know, I've been hunting for one myself," your father said, gesturing at the tie that belonged to your lover- the one which he had expressed such concern. Xavier glanced across at you while his cheeks displayed a pink hue. Knowing that you would already be wearing a "I told you so" smirk.

Your family and your lover wouldn't stop talking the rest of the night. attempting to embarrass you in any way possible. bringing up that one talent show in which you participated in. showing Xavier your baby pictures. reminiscing about your crazy One Direction fan girl days. Embarrassing? Yes. Heart-warming? Also, yes

As it became late, you thanked your parents for the dinner and gathered your coat before heading out. Hugging each one of your family members.

“Mr. and Mrs. y/l/n, I appreciate you having me over. Since I don't come from a large family, I want to say thank you for letting me spend one night as a part of yours.” Your eyes started to well up with tears as soon as you heard your boyfriend say those words. Your parents said goodbye while giving him a tight hug.

“Please continue taking care of our daughter” your father shouted across your driveway.

“Always will” Xavier replied looking at you cheekily.

Xavier was asking a million questions about your family on the trip back to Nevermore. gaining a deeper understanding of things. Both of you laughed as you recalled the secrets that your siblings had revealed about you when you were younger.

“Baby, thank you for inviting me over. . .really. I don’t remember the last Christmas I spent with my dad. It really felt like Christmas this year with your lovely family and by your side, of course.”

“Aw Xay, you seriously need to stop saying thank you. You’re a part of my family now. I love you, do you know that?” You couldn’t help but wonder how you got so lucky.

“I do, you never make me forget. Do you know that I love you?” He gave you a small giggle as his hand gave your thigh a playful squeeze.

Christmas this year was quite memorable beside your boyfriend.

A.N: fluff. More fluff. And again, more fluff. I’ve been m.i.a for a few days, fan girlies. Christmas time & now New Years is busy and I’ve been enjoying every second. I’m also leaving town for NYE so add packing to it all. Anyways, I hope you all had a great Christmas!!

I’d do anything to spend my favorite time of the year with Thorpe boy. Unfortunately he was not under my tree this year so we’ll try next time.

As always— requests are always open! Share your thoughts! Talk to me! Get something off your mind!✨

[fairycosmos]

i feel like ur almost the only person who i can talk to about this. i lost my brother similar to you also almost three years ago. how do you feel about the angus cloud situation? i couldn’t even read the full article bc i related to his situation so well and it hit me to my core. my mom and i almost both took our lives together days after his passing and sometimes i feel guilty for still being here when i wanted to just end it all and still do bc life’s not worth it without him. i also judge myself bc i feel like bc i didn’t leave i’m not showing how horrible i truly feel (to both him, myself, and others) idk. i just wanted ur thoughts on feeling guilty and also feeling invalidated in how we handle our grief

yeah honestly i've been avoiding articles on it like ever since i heard the news ive just been kind of blocking it out, did the same w demi lovato's drug overdose in (i think) 2021 i just can't even begin to approach news like that. it fucks me up for weeks/months at a time and i cant afford to feel like that honestly. i'm so so sorry youre going through it too and i'm sorry youre in such a dark place, i know me and my mam often are too. it's the kind of feeling words cant really touch and i wont try but i absolutely do understand and i think everything youre going through makes a very painful sort of sense - the guilt, the absolute despair, having to go along with the way life just moves forward and then feeling bad because youre not displaying how awful you truly feel. i feel like i'm feeling my sister in so many ways every day honestly, i feel like i failed her the day she died and every day since. guilt is such a big part of my grief, and i think it's one of the most unavoidable and natural parts of it too unfortunately. we'll always feel a heavy responsibility towards them because we love them so so much and the worst thing that couldve happened to them happened. i think there's not many ways for the brain to make sense of that without going a bit mad. there are so many moments that ive wished i could swap places with her, so many moments i just want to die, and still i'm here and i still i have to deal with being here. those are very difficult, conflicting emotions - im so so sorry. i hope you have the support you deserve in your life and i hope youre able to find a way to mourn your brother that feels a bit more cathartic (if there even is such a version of mourning.) i hope you're able to talk about this with a grief counsellor or someone who can help you make sense of what youre thinking and feeling in a way that doesn't hurt so much - not because i think it'll solve anything or bring your brother back, because you deserve to be listened to and validated throughout the grieving process. for your own good, whether you feel you deserve it or not - you do. if you ever want to talk about him, tell stories about him and what he was like, or talk about what ur going please know im always here. i'd like to talk about becca (my sister) more too and share her memory in a way that makes her feel real again. sending a massive hug. x

[aaronpaceluvbot]

i got you, you got me - love you till kingdom come.

summary: in which you go through a lot with tom

wc: 1.1k

before you read: yes this is a song fic, this was originally meant to be for aaron but tom was calling out to me, spoilers for tom’s route/bad ends (stay/go?? if i remember right), LOWKEY ANGSTY (huzzah!!), very open end ending!

—

growing up with tom was, in your views, pretty good, simple even. even as a child, tom loved video games, but he also loved spending time with you, playing in the backyard until the sun set and coming inside for dinner and a few rounds of video games. you don’t truly remember many of these days, childhood amnesia to blame, but you do remember thoroughly enjoying them and never wanting them to end. however, you do remember one particular incident that you were never able to shake off, no matter how much time passed. 

it was past sunset, when you two were meant to be inside, but tom insisted on one more round of fairytale hide and seek. fairytale hide and seek was a game where one of you would be in distress and the other would be the hero, finding the other’s hiding spot and swooping in to save them. it was dark now and you treaded through the dark bushes behind tom’s house, finding a suitable hiding spot. however, time flew by, but you didn’t notice as you were too busy staring at the unmoving sky, only displaying bright constellations. you let out a soft sigh, wishing you understood what your teacher was saying when she explained how to find your way home using the constellations. you shake your head at your misfortune and hoped that someone, particularly tom would find you. it was always you and tom, never inseparable and never apart. being alone and away in the dark hurt, especially not knowing how to get back through the twisting vegetation. 

by the time you were found, the next day was in full swing. a concerned and very apologetic tom greeted you and gave you the first hug you would ever remember receiving from him. the two of you learnt some very valuable things that day and made a promise to never let something like this happen again. the two of you were inseparable since then, even throughout middle school and high school, opting to pick classes and electives that would keep you two together.

“we’ll stick together forever, right?” you would ask him, looking into his eyes for confirmation. he nods affirmatively.

“right.”

—

ironically enough, it was that fateful bandcamp that brought the two of you closer. with it being the first bandcamp away from school, everyone was excited. you remember giggling with cadence as you two were on the phone, packing your belongings for camp. cadence was the only one who knew about your feelings towards tom, and she supported the notion and tried to encourage you to talk to him about them. you would always gently shake your head at her idea and reject it, hating the idea of ruining a perfectly good friendship because of feelings that might not even last for that long. “i’m just not sure,” you’d murmur, disliking cadence’s idea. 

“i know, but your feelings aren’t just gonna go away if you just keep trying to hide them!” cadence says, with a concerned tone in her voice. you nod at her words, despising the amount of truth in them. 

“i know, but i don’t think there’s really a better option, you know?” you say, sighing as you lay on your bed. “i just don’t know what to do. it feels like there’s only 2 options in front of me, and i don’t like either of them.” the phone picks up her humming as she tries to think of a solution for you. 

“well maybe you should look into that third option - waiting. you can wait until a better scenario presents itself and then you can tell him or maybe you can just wait out your feelings if you really don’t wanna tell him,” she suggests. the conversation goes on, but all you can think about is how maybe cadence is right. maybe waiting is the right solution. 

—

waiting was not the right solution. you let out a sharp hiss of pain as you touch your side. your hand comes back, stained red. you sigh and try to think on the bright side - you could easily be dead by now. you hear tom next to you mutter, “seriously? i really liked this shirt.” you take a quick glance at him and notice that he’s in the same predicament. great. no one expected band camp to end like this - with blood and bruises and escape plans that were shared through hushed whispers. 

“that’s all you can say?” you ask him, turning your neck towards him. your body stays still, trying to recover all the blood lost. wiley’s bound to catch up soon, so you’re taking what little victories you can get. you haven’t bled out yet and you’re kinda by the escape tunnel… so that has to count for something, right?

“you said to try and think on the bright side! this is the bright side! i really like this shirt!” he exclaims, or at least tries to. you let out another hiss of pain as the wound in your side burns. it hurts, but there’s not much you can do about it. 

“i thought i said that in my head. and aren’t we literally dying?” you ask, looking at him, or at least trying to. you see him do something that looks like an attempt at shrugging his shoulders. 

“i don’t wanna think about it.” you nod at his words and leave it at that. you want to tell him, but this feels like horrible timing. scratch that, it doesn’t feel like it. it is. but this may be your last time together, so screw it. 

“tom, can i tell you something?” you murmur. suddenly your chest gets tight and it’s hard to breathe. you can’t tell if it’s because of the wounds or because of the fact that you’re about to confess to your childhood best friend when you two are quite literally on your deathbeds. 

“yeah… what is it? and if it’s the stain on my shirt, i know,” he says, trying to joke. you shake your head and let out what feels like a small laugh. 

“no… it’s something that i’ve never told you before, but i think you deserve to know. i’ve liked you all this time. for a while now, actually,” you say, letting out a sigh of relief and a small laugh as you let those heavy words free from your thoughts. 

“really?” he asks, sounding shocked. you try to nod, but your head feels heavy all of a sudden. you touch the source of pain and your hand comes back red once more. you know this is it. your eyes gently shut as you hear the loud footsteps in the distance become closer and closer and you hear tom shriek. you want to help him, but you feel locked in place, unable to move, unable to breathe even. it all goes quiet. this time, when you’re gone, you’re with tom. you’re not sure if this is what little you meant when you said you wanted the two of you to be together forever.

[queenofmalkier]

The Ongoing Egwene Exploration

If I’m gonna kick the hive, I might as well cite the books and clarify my meaning.

I’m going to preface this with, while Egwene is not my personal favorite character that doesn’t make her a bad character, a bad person, etc. I do stand by my statement that I find her to be arrogant to the point of being dangerous, and her motivations at time are not as pure as she suggests from her own POV chapters, but ultimately she is who needed to be in the role she played, and she is a vital part of the series.

This is going to be a multiple parter, because I truly wish to be fair about my perceptions. The rest will probably be in September because I’m going to be away on a trip. But who knows I might get squirrelly.

Basically, I’m going to skim through the books and only review mentions of Egwene that give insight to her character/how she is perceived by those who personally know her or her own POV chapters.

As an aside, I would argue that unlikable female characters are important. More important than the Moiraine’s (who also had her fair share of arrogance), more important than the stern-yet-soft-hearted Nynaeve’s. They’re the most important in fiction because we so often don’t get to see them.

Female characters are forced to be likeable or be Amy Dunne. Even their grey areas are carefully negotiated so they aren’t written off as a bitch.

They don’t get to be heroes that you sincerely hope you never have to be stuck in an elevator with.

They don’t get the depth and variety because it makes people uncomfortable.

I find that annoying on a good day, on a bad day it makes me want to burn half my library. Modern writers have developed much more nuanced characters, and we’re beginning to see “new” types of female characters that really are just based on living, breathing, real people, but the backlash and fear of it is often there too.

It’s very easy for people to hate a female character. Just look at any popular series and go to reddit. If by some miracle there’s more than one female character in the main cast, chances are there are individuals complaining about her.

Hell, they’ll complain even if she’s the only female character.

(The phrase Mary Sue will appear often. If it does not make you want to boil with rage at the outright hypocrisy when compared with every mainstream male character I invite you to walk into the ocean.)

Lastly, before we begin, this is solely about Egwene. I can just as easily get into every single character in the series and how they also display negative characteristics but then we’re going to be here for ten years. I specifically said Egwene when I kicked the hive and I’m going to see how well my argument is supported by the source material.

So, Egwene.

Why does she get under my skin? How is she any more arrogant than the other characters in the series? What about her do I find troubling and ultimately dangerous? Am I biased because she was mean to my poor little meow meow trash son Gawyn?

Let us start with our first introduction to Egwene, through the eyes of a very, very smitten Rand. (To be fair, I would also be smitten. Just because I don’t particularly like her doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be half in love with her in ten minutes.) We know through later POV’s that Egwene has admitted that he is easy to manipulate so it is difficult not to allow that to color this transaction now, but let us try.

She begins by mimicking Nynaeve, a figure of authority, perhaps to see the effect it has. This is a trait she carries on throughout the series until she no longer needs to mimic and instead becomes the one who is mimicked.

But she soon shifts focus to staring at Rand, unsettling him because he has a crush the size of a solar system and it’s so obvious Perrin and Mat leave him to his fate. They flirt a little before Egwene reveals her now braided hair.

This is a very calculated move, and it feels planned, on her part. A test. But what is she testing?

Being a young, unmarried man in a small village that definitely pushes traditional values, Rand senses a trap here but it’s not what he’s expecting. I think this gives us a very key piece of information about Egwene early on. We think this is her Hint Hint moment, only for her to pull the rug out and mention not only does she want to become a Wisdom, a woman who seldom marries, but that she’ll likely have to travel to a different village in order to do so because Nynaeve isn’t going to retire any time soon. Egwene is telling us that she wants more.

Queue Belle song.

We also see some of her arrogance here. “She says I have a talent, that I can learn to listen to the wind. Nynaeve says not all Wisdoms can, even if they say they do.” When Rand fails to be suitably impressed, we get the very word used that I have mentioned already: dangerous.

Again, we’re seeing character traits I originally brought up: manipulative, arrogant, dangerous. She strikes me very much as the type of person who plans encounters in her head before they happen. That isn’t a bad thing - as the most socially anxious person ever I do this as well as a way to ease my anxiety and plan for everything I can think of - I am simply making an observation. This does not feel like a casual, unplanned conversation on Egwene’s part.

(Manipulative behavior in and of itself also isn’t inherently negative, most human interaction is based on it.)

Yet this moment isn’t Egwene gently letting Rand down either is it? Because Rand - puppy that he is - mentions he’d never see her again and she’s back to vaguely suggesting it’s not like he cares. Because we only see it from his perspective, it’s hard to know if she shuts down ultimately because the conversation didn’t go how she’d planned, or if her temper really did get the better of her.

Was she angry he didn’t demand they wed? That didn’t demand she not become a Wisdom? What was her ultimate goal here? Did she have one? Because of her age, I highly doubt Egwene is some crazy, master manipulator of Hannibal Lecter proportions. She’s not even on level 1 of that crazy train; I doubt she even knows where the station is. Not yet.

My perception here is she’s likely conflicted and confused about what she wants, and angry that Rand isn’t giving her anything to act on. He isn’t saying no, so she can’t dig her heels in. He isn’t offering to marry her so she can’t react to that either. He’s simply saying he’d never see her again, and what’s she to do with that? Egwene very much is a character who wants to act, and right now she has nothing to fuel her to action.

We do get the idea that Egwene is sensitive, perhaps overly so. Does she feel the limitations of the Two Rivers? How small their world is? Do their recent visitors make her feel equally small and therefore her fuse is shorter than normal?

I do want to mention here that I do not want to dismiss Egwene’s cleverness, or her own abilities when it comes to gleaning information from others. Yes, she’s eavesdropping in this moment, but even before she was reading Rand and the others like braille, which is a skill that should not be undervalued.

Overall, I think for our initial introduction to Egwene, she’s very much a baby version of the woman she will become, and the chapter meets my memory and expectation of what I was going to find. (I’ve re-read The Eye of the World more than any of the other books for a variety of reasons so it’s the one I remember the best.)

[thatsailorscout]

Unpopular Opinion: Big Red and Ashlyn need to stay together in Season 4.

(This is going to be pretty long, so feel free to scroll if it’s too long for your own taste!)

Okay, so I’ve recently finished season 3 of my favorite show: HSMTMTS. It’s been a huge rollercoaster, to say the least, but I like to say that I thoroughly enjoyed the last episode of the series. I think this episode has a satisfying conclusion to the Wildcats’ summer, and I think it is by far my second favorite season aside from Season 1, of course. I don’t think anything could unmatch the Rina love confession, seeing Kourtney sing her way through Let It Go, and get to say hello to Big Red, and goodbye to Nini for the final time. It’s safe to say that I’m very much looking forward to Season 4 whenever it comes out. Anyway, that’s enough of me talking about the finale. It’s time to talk about Big Red and Ashlyn.

The writing and camerawork has made it super obvious that they are pushing for Maddox and Ashlyn to be together. While I love Maddox as a character, I just think she’s the one for Ashlyn. I can already sense their being conflict between her and Big Red in the next season due to Maddox (she’s probably going to transfer to east high) so it makes me feel a little disappointed. However, I’m holding on to the possibility of despite Ashlyn’s growing feelings for Maddox, her heart belongs to Big Red. Now, let’s get this show on the road.

Reason 1: Big Red is Ashlyn’s #1 Supporter

I cannot stress how much of a sweetheart Big Red is. He has been so in love with Ashlyn since Day One, and will always be. Starting in Season 1, he was one of the first people to notice how talented she was. A prime example is presented when Big Red is helping Ashlyn carry food for a get-together with friends. They spark up a conversation on how Big Red ended up in the theatre as a crew alongside Ricky. This leads to Big Red complimenting Ashlyn, “The only thing I’d throw at your face is a brighter spotlight because I like the way you sing.” This compliment makes Ashlyn feel seen for the first few times that season. Despite playing a supporting character in the first season, Big Red sees her as a star who needs to learn how to shine first.

This is displayed many more times throughout the show, but another example is nearing the end of Season 2, after the spring musical, Beauty and the Beast has been performed. That season, we got to see Ashlyn take the spotlight and shine as Belle. To congratulate Ashlyn on her performance, he makes a poster spelling out Ashlyn’s name on light bulbs. “I’ve always seen your name in lights,” He goes on to explain, “You were the perfect Belle. I was proud,” Big Red has always been so kind towards Ashlyn. I feel like aside from physical touch, words of encouragement, full of love. The same goes for Ashlyn with Big Red. She always cheered and supported him when he first auditioned for the musical in Season 2. I just love their positive energy with each other, and I think that’s what a long-term relationship need.

Whenever Big Red and Ashlyn are onscreen, their chemistry is always there. Even before they were together, the show makes it clear how well they mesh together. The looks Big Red gives her every time Ashlyn performs, the looks they share with EACH-OTHER, meaningful conversations with the other person, and Ashlyn shielding Big Red during the storm are what sell them to me. The little moments are so worth it because they truly sell every scene they are in. Especially their kiss scene in the last episode of the first season. I adore how their kiss scene isn’t this huge love confession. It's just Ashlyn being amazed by Big Red’s tapping skills, and giving him a big fat kiss. How cute is that?

Their conversations don’t feel forced. The thing about Big Red and Ashlyn is that they don’t have to say much for them to be on the same level. Despite their conflict in Season 2 where Ashlyn wasn’t exactly supportive of Big Red’s initial career choice, Ashlyn communicates with Big Red by showing up and wearing a Salt Slices shirt. Ashlyn doesn’t have to verbalize anything to Big Red for him to know how much his choices mean to her.

Reason 3: They are SOULMATES.

What else can I say? I think that they’re truly meant for each other. Yes, as a person you make mistakes, learn from them, and grow as a human being. That doesn’t mean Big Red and Ashlyn can’t accept change and grow with each other. I’m hoping in Season 4 that Ashlyn realizes that Big Red is the one for her, instead of it being Maddox. Big Red and Ashlyn already have a special bond of being that extremely cute, and dorky couple. They are the most unproblematic ship (aside from Rina) in the entire show. They’ve already built a foundation of trust, friendship, and love. I think Redlyn deserves a chance in Season 4 because they deserve to be together. It just would be a shame for them as a couple to go to waste, and I don’t think I’m ready for such a drastic change if they were to ever break up.

[milla984]

Hi....

This Spencer Ried guy that i see on your blog a lot... sorry haven't watched criminal minds yet.

Tell me something about that character. Why do you love them so much

… well, Anon, grab a chair and make yourself comfortable!

The first thing I actually liked about Spencer Reid back in the day was the fact that he’s played by Matthew Gray Gubler, so he’s definitely the perfect example of non-toxic masculinity to me.

The character is almost immediately introduced as a genius - by his own admission he’s got an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, can read 20.000 word per minute and has three PhDs (Mathematics, Chemistry, Engineering) which is enough to make me go “yes, give me more of this guy, pls”. Later on it is also revealed he holds BAs in Sociology, Psychology and he’s studying to get a third one in Philosophy. Need I say more?!

During the first season he’s only 23, meaning he’s the youngest member of the Behavioral Analysis Unit (BAU) team and actually looks like a puppy. Spoiler alert: even after 15 seasons he still looks like a puppy to me and I just want to hug him and keep him safe. Why? Because he’s S O F T, caring and loves his mom and friends to pieces. They feel the same about him and he ends up being the godfather of both sons of Jennifer 'JJ' Jareau, his fellow team member; another team member, Derek Morgan (who affectionately addresses Spencer as 'kid') names his firstborn Hank Spencer - after his own dad and Reid, obviously, claiming he’s the best little brother anybody could ever ask for.

So, yeah… Spencer is a total sweetheart and has been through A LOT: his father left when he was very young and his mom sadly suffers from schizophrenia, meaning little Spencer had to care for her and was forced to commit her against her will when he was 18 (what’s truly heartbreaking to me is that she’s fully aware and immensely proud of his abilities: she loves him and when she’s not having a bad day she’s easily his biggest supporter). He’s also shown to be very empathetic towards certain unsubs (the “villains” of each episode, so to speak) especially when it turns out they’ve been victims of violence or abuse, because he himself has been targeted by bullies; in Season 3 he recalls the time his high school mates tricked him into believing the prettiest girl in school wanted to talk to him in private, while in reality the entire football team ambushed him, stripped him naked and tied him to a goalpost (it’s worth mentioning that he was about 12yo when this happened, because being a genius he graduated from high school around that age).

In Season 2 he develops an addiction to Dilaudid, after being kidnapped and tortured by an unsub; the authors of the show have a questionable habit of putting him through hell, just because, and IMHO the only instance when Spencer getting shot actually has a valid purpose is in Season 5 - Gubler dislocated his knee IRL so they needed an explanation for Reid walking around in crutches for a while.

Since I have a feeling this post could go on forever (and we don't have that much time), I’ll just throw in a few more random reasons why I love Spencer Reid: he wears his wristwatch over his sleeve. He’s a Star Wars and Doctor Who fan. He always wear mismatched socks (as MGG, the actor who plays him, does) and is often seen wearing Converse shoes. I’m biased and I know it, but to me he’s easily the best dressed character of the entire show. His apartment is a mood and very dark-academia-ish. He’s socially awkward and displays a lot of behavioral indicators he’s on the spectrum (sadly the authors never confirmed it and it’s one of the many issues I have with the writing on this show, but that’s not the place to talk about it) so I adore his mannerism: he loves to sit on desks/tables, he almost never shakes hand but greets stranger with the cutest hand-waves ever and when he’s excited about something he rambles/talks super fast and sometimes he has an adorable high-pitched squeal (Reid stans definitely knows what I mean).

Hope this answer works for you!!

[digestionsack]

Thought Bubble

And now I’m thinking about Mike’s POV throughout the entire show. And I’m wondering if our access to his POV and thoughts is entirely dependent on how he sees himself.

In S1-2, when Mike’s looking for Will, we see him take the reigns. He is the leader, his deductive reasoning skills are on full display, and he is he’s given a ton of screen time—he’s the most directly involved he’s ever been. And then you have S3-4, where he kind of takes a backseat. What was the reason for this shift? What major changes would prompt this?

The biggest change I think for Mike in S3 is having El as his girlfriend and having both Will and El in his life simultaneously. And if we’re going back to what I said about how his perception of himself affects how much of him we see, that would imply that he no longer sees himself as a leader figure in S3-4 as much as he did in the first two seasons.

…which makes me think of Mike’s speech to Will in the van, right before the painting is revealed.

“And one day she’s gonna realize that I’m just some random nerd that got lucky that Superman landed on his doorstep.”

When he’s with El, he sees himself as just the side character boyfriend, just that “random nerd.” How long has Mike felt like this? Is it recent? Since S2? If this is to line up with my theory, he started feeling this way when he and El started dating.

When he is working to help Will in s1-2, we see him stepping up, having confidence in his leadership skills and deductive reasoning. But when he becomes El’s boyfriend, we see that he has a lot of insecurities—not playing D&D to seem cooler to her and cooler in general. We see that as well as having a savior complex, he also has low self-esteem and an inferiority complex—and that’s a really dangerous combination. An example of when we really see this (before he starts dating El) is when he jumps off a literal cliff to save Dustin. We’ve talked about this a lot in the tag. He was way too willing to die.

Yes, him putting El up on a “superhero” pedestal is really bad for her view of herself and her self-esteem. That much we all know. But it’s also really bad for Mike’s view of himself and his self-esteem. Because the more he projects this “superhero” image on her, the worse his own inferiority complex gets. He covered it up decently well in S3, but in S4 when some of the big issues in their relationship are the “love” and “superhero” thing, these insecurities are brought to the forefront.

Will and Mike view each other as equals. When Will is the main focus of the season, so is Mike, and vise versa. But even though El was a huge focus this season (everything with her powers and Project Nina), Mike is still sidelined. Because that’s how he feels in this relationship and at this stage in his life. Not a leader or a hero. Someone lesser than. And that’s honestly so heartbreaking to me when you break it down like this. Really, it breaks my heart every time we find a new piece of evidence supporting this. When I was going through Mike’s playlist and saw that “Mad World” by Tears for Fears was on there…I swear to you, I almost started crying.

I really need Mike’s mental health to be addressed. Truly. And it can’t happen unless Mike and El break up. Because as long as Mike is still with El, he will still be acting like someone he isn’t. Those emotional walls will still be up.

And although there has been a lot of death symbolism associating with Mike (the constant parallels to Romeo, a lot of the songs on his playlist), I really don’t Mike dying permanently would be a satisfying end to his arc. Because that would mean that the inferiority complex never really got resolved, and it would be another way of reinforcing that he only feels loved when he’s needed/can be of service to someone (because Mike’s death if it were to happen would most likely be a sacrifice). And that’s also why it means so much that what Will basically told Mike when he said this:

“See how you’re leading us here? You’re guiding the whole party, inspiring us. That’s what you do. And see your coat of arms here? It’s a heart. And I know it’s sort of on the nose, but that’s what holds this party together—heart.”

Was this:

“You don’t need to be anyone but you. You are enough. You might see yourself as a “random nerd,” but you are perfect just the way you are. You don’t need to be this larger-than-life hero. You just need to be you.”

And that, my friends, is the most fucking beautiful thing I have ever heard in my goddamned life.