#it literally ate my dialog

[narastories]

oh gods what the fuck

So uh what happened was, I was typing away merrily into Focus Writer. I got to about 20k and then the point where I want to move things around came a bit sooner than usual. So I though, let me copy each scene separately into Wavemaker, make cards with my notes and rearrange some things. It worked beautifully, I was really happy with it.

Then I thought, okay, let me export it in one so I can work on the rearranged version again in Focus Writer. And then I got this fucking monstrosity.

So either the Wavemaker doc export thing is broken or this shit isn't compatible with each other. arrrgggghh I have no time to figure out how to remove the fucking HTML tags from this and I don't want to...

Don't worry, I still have an untouched odt file + I can move things around by hand, it's just frustrating. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO MAKE MY LIFE EASIER NOT HARDER

Edit: Okay so apparently if you use Chrome + Microsoft Word it will work. And then I'll upload that to Google Drive is that what you want me to do??? Well fuck that shit, emphatically.

[flowerwiththemachinegun]

Pookie plz consider doing an ex dynamics post for Genesis, or a part 2 for Seph cause it ate

Ex dynamics Genesis. Scattered notes round 47. Driving layup let’s get it :v.

Only something else that took me 45 years to do. I wanted to cuntify him more, but you get the picture with this. Or I think at least.

This is, to me personally, the best ex. Maybe you all will see it my way too. If not, it’s okay. He lives rent free in my mind. You two probably would have been claiming you were in love with each other within 10 minutes while Angeal stares at him like “not this again”

Genesis fucking Rhapsodos. The type of man to wait until he sees you “completely” move on to admit that he still loves you. It absolutely is(not) too late for that. Hates to see you with another person. He has to throw himself in the mix to cause a bit of confusion. Text messages and phone calls won’t suffice, he’ll just pop up on you. At your house, hangout spots, work. For some reason he always tries to make it seem like all he’s up to is seeing how you’re doing; that isn’t the reality here. I guess kind of. Genesis does care. He knows how hard it is to say no to him when he’s right in your face. You’re just silly enough to fall in his trap. You’ll take him back every time. Even if it means cheating on the person you’re with now. Genesis dictates when your relationships die. He’s a homewrecker but only for the one he loves. This fucker will go out of his way to make sure he’s fucking you in time for your current significant other home.

Does shit like showing up in public with gifts and what not so it’s harder to turn him away. You’d never publicly embarrass Genesis. Besides, it’s like he knows just what you want/need at the time. With the way he always keeps you in mind, far more than other people you have dated, it’s hard to turn down such thoughtful gestures. He does often use this tacit to his advantage. Why change it up when you’ve made it so easy? 

He’ll still do anything you ask of him. Especially if you’re messing around with him or sees his chance to go in for the kill. You can’t ask him for a thing if you’ve actually moved on. What benefit would he be getting out of it? If it isn’t you he’ll be pulling back in, he isn’t too concerned with doing anything about it. Genesis will probably say something along the lines of “What happened to my replacement?” 

If you work in the Shinra building, I can guarantee he’s still all over you in the halls. If you’ve seen me talk about Genesis before, I refer to him as “The Rizzler” and that’s exactly what the fuck he is going to be doing. He doesn’t want anyone to know the two of you split up. So he’s going to go out of his way to create a false image as if the two of you were still together. Most of this is to divert anyone that might have their attention on you. Not that anyone would be brave enough to go after Genesis’ ex, but he certainly doesn’t want a soul to bother. I do think for the most part Genesis is fairly secure in himself and confident so jealousy isn’t as much of a problem in terms of random people trying to flirt with you. Kind of only acts out if you’re going to be serious about someone or if he’s truly fucked up again. (ex: you: going to get some air after an argument. Genesis: “So that’s it? You’re going out to get fucked.) {Feel free to reword that, it didn’t get written with the actual gas dialog I had in mind at first.}

Come on. His go to color is red. What does that stand for guys? You know, be for real. Red flags, obviously. Genesis literally wears his flag every day. Hell, he was born waving that flag. It’s literally on fire. You didn’t see that shit? Can’t even feel bad for yourself. 

Genesis is a very sweet, loving man. I have no doubt about that. But I also think at times, specifically when his own feelings are hurt, he’s got the same amount of emotional maturity as Rufus. Loyal, honest, affectionate and passionate, genuine; you get it. Yet bitter, a couple of pinches of being manipulative and controlling, then being petty and vindictive on top of it? Yeah, Genesis is also a little bit of a headache. 

But the d…The d is fire right? You’ll take the feeling of shame for falling into bed with him again with no problem. He’s a hard man to stay away from. It’s near impossible with the way he kisses you after licking your own juices from his fingers. Something about being able to smell and taste you while kissing drives that man to play risky games. As if having kids in his already busy life is possibly doable. Though, if it keeps you tied to him, he might as well give you at least one right? (Might be a baby trapper, I have not determined fully yet. Genesis is a “too good to be true with hella flaws” so I say possibly.)

Like, hear me out, I don’t think he’s insane. However, Genesis is the type to see your car in a neighborhood to find out who's house you're going to since he “doesn't remember you having any family or friends in the area.” He won’t cause a scene over it since he’ll play it off as stopping to say hi. It will be brought up as an argument later. Don’t think otherwise. It doesn’t matter if he chooses to bring it up two weeks later. He won’t forget. 

Comes by your place at the most convenient times. Somehow knows when you’ll have company over. Doesn’t really matter who is there or if he recognizes them upon seeing their car outside or being one of your friends or coworkers. He especially isn’t the biggest fan of your friends. He’s heard them encourage you to leave him alone. Genesis knows they won’t speak on these things while he’s around. It’s an attempt to keep others out of your head. You don’t need to hear their opinions. “That's why they’re lonely and single now.”  I can actually hear a lecture right now. 

If it comes down to someone he isn’t familiar with, Genesis is immediately standoffish in their presence. Usually enough to make your guest make an abrupt exit. You don’t quite know how he does it, in fact he hardly says a word to them outside of acknowledging their presence. It could be the glare they receive whenever they so much as breathe too loud. Who knows? Yes, you’re blind to it, but the air becomes so thick it immediately feels like walking on eggshells for your new ‘friend’. You won’t have to worry about seeing them again after this. They typically don’t talk to you very much after being intimidated by Genesis. 

Genesis is literally the “I was wrong ex” but it's more like “I was wrong but” like that's supposed to be an apology or taking accountability cause he's really about to justify all of his shitty/crazy actions following up with that statement. He knows when he’s made bad decisions and hurt you but he can’t put his ego aside completely to say “Hey, I fucked up.” There is usually something he tries to throw back in your face to argue his point on why he did what he did.

[panka-attic]

Okay I'll be putting my thoughts here gradually cuz I'm still reeling and I'm fucking exhausted after how much I felt.

Just a mashup of impressions.

The dialogs that are simply golden. What Louis is saying about shit life beating no life is what I love Anne for. That's a type of thing she was putting in every book she wrote. That's why TVC saves lives. That's why I'm so fixated. For anybody who was dealing with hard depressive episodes or just the world being cruel and horrible stuff piling up, it's what you need to hear to feel loved. There's so much love. Even the first Armand Louis discussion that's there as a voiceover is so tender. I was fearing they'll loose this aspect and I didn't expect so much of it, that's why it's got me so hard. I literally started crying when I was half in.

About the relationship as a whole. I DIDN'T EXPECT THEM TO BE SO BOLD TOO. Showing Lesmand already? I thought there'll be just a glimpse in the season itself. So much in the trailer..gods. I need a few days to comprehend it. Loumand is waaaay softer than I thought it will be as well. Armand is more vulnerable than what I imagined they would make him in general. It's precisely the books, it's fucking precious. I'm just not used to it, not used to getting such faithful adaptations. Everybody's vulnerability and love for each other were more on the wishlist than among the things I believed they'd really go into.

Theatre. Just theatre and how good it is.

Delainey ate it up. I hope she'll get a lot more roles after this, so we can see her more.

Sam is perfect, no notes.

And finally Justin *fucking tortured me for half a year* Kirk. I think it's the second time I screamed. First one was that Lesmand bite. My first thought was Marius of course, but I won't be riding this train for now. He really doesn't look like him there. Whether he is David or it's a disguise, I don't want to raise my hopes up. I haaave an inkling it's just to confuse us, but yeah, don't want to crush hard if he isn't de Romanus.

[magpies4nights]

What?! What day is it again?! (Dev log #6.9)

Oh god, it's 2024. What the hell. Where am I.

Anyways, I would have uploaded yesterday (January 1st) but I felt incredibly tired and nauseous from the night before. I couldn't sleep till 1 am because I ate too much (12 grapes is already too much for me). I'm still tired because I haven't been able to sleep properly for 2 days. I don't know if I've been staring at my computer for too long or what.

Onto actually talking about development. It's been a slow one, especially since I came back home. The only thing I would say I completed are the portraits, mostly because so far there are approximately 72 of them. If you're asking who's got the most portraits so far, I would have said guess, but people don't like doing that so I'll tell you. It's Priyah (applause). Xandra is in 3rd place.

(not actual dialog. so far.)

I don't have any new music for this time around. I guess college gives me more inspiration than I thought, which is surprising especially since every time I come back from it I want to move to mars (and risk my life) with how the people are there. Y'all, if you're going to look for universities in Texas... go to New Mexico or literally anywhere else. For your own sanity. Anyways, Happy late new year, and Happy late 3rd Anniversary GASA4am! (I unfortunately don't have anything for this wondrous occasion)

[dartalias]

RoK comic update:

[I know this is a long not promessing rant but i swear i'll post it this weekend or so]

*Screaming crying melting on the floor*

Everything's fine

"You say it would be done in february"

...

(In my defence i totally frogot february only had 28 days)

Sorry guy i've been hit by a bus (metaphorically)

The line art, dialogs/narration, basic coloring + most shadows/details ate done, just have to finish some more details and fix one or two things

It SHOULD be faster but i was STUPID

the file on ibis paint its current 180 fucking hours long

And my poor ancient drawing machine CANNOT handle it

So the page just crash under its own pressure

Like A LOT

So i have to keep restoring it to continue working on it but it takes AGES

Like it just crashed AGAIN (i swear its like the fifth time) so i will only be able to work on it again tomorrow (╥_╥)

(already figure out how to avoid this problem in the future so its fine, hopefully)

But outside of that

Its almost done

Upon the quality... i cant say it, i mean literally, i dont know if its good or not, i was hating it a LOT (the pre mentioned metathorical bus had influenced on that) now im liking it a bit more but... i dont know

I might change some desing choices in future, nothing too drastic tho i'll try to keep the art style consistent as possible

also this all proved to me that this project will takes a lot of time (who could've say??) So the next ones will probably take equally or even longer to finish sorry ┐(‘～`；)┌

(1-2 months for a 20 pages comic its not that bad right??)

This one (if everything goes right (please) will be posted this weekend) its "the beginning, or almost that" - that its a "non cannon" preamble + the chapter "the test" with 18 pages + cover if im not mistaking

the next one its the chapters "nine years later" + "the boy from Makapu" (maybe one or two extra things it will depend on how long its gonna get

After that im still in planning estage but the norm will probably continue to be more or less 2 chapters per comic with some extra/reorganized content

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #6

Leviathan:

You: *eats 100 ears of corn in two hours* I am the corn king! I cannot be outcorned

Me: *eats 101 ears of corn in ten minutes* just another day in the corn fields

Mammon: What?

Leviathan: I don’t know. I woke up at 6am, wrote this, and went back to sleep

•

Asmodeus: I’m looking for a romantic way to say I hope you think about me when you masturbate sometimes

Simeon: In the deepest, calmest hours of the night when you have naught but your own company, I hope my image fills you with bliss

Mammon: Wow

Satan: Nailed it

•

Belphegor: Julius Caesar’s assassination was the last time everyone in a group project did their part

Solomon: Apart from the fact 60 people agreed to stab him and he only had 23 stab wounds

MC: Sounds about right

•

Thirteen: HELLO BOYS I HAVE A QUESTION CAN YOU FEEL OUR BOOBS WHEN WE DO THE HUG

Mammon: WE CAN FEEL YOUR BOOBS WHEN WE DO THE HUG SORRY

MC: ANOTHER QUESTION DOES IT FEEL WEIRD? YOU KNOW THE WHOLE BOOB THING

Satan: IT FEELS GOOD AGAIN SORRY

Thirteen: ONE MORE QUESTION DOES YOUR PENIS FLOAT IN WATER

Belphegor: YES

Solomon: I like how there were five different people speaking the same dialog

•

Luke: My brother whistles a specific melody when he comes to refill the bird feeders. The birds have started singing it when they’re empty.

Leviathan: This bitch empty TWEET

•

Satan: I had a 7AM class and the kid next to me poured an energy drink into his coffee, said “I’m going to die” and drank the whole thing

•

Leviathan: One time my brother was working at Home Depot and got called down to help handle an outrageously angry man returning a lawnmower and it was our older brother

•

Mammon: 5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and

Satan: Was diagnosed with mesothelioma

Leviathan: Mamma called the doctor and the doctor said

Belphegor: You might be entitled to financial compensation if he or a loved one dies

•

Satan: You can tack on “and dragons” after any title and it’ll be 900% better

Raphael: Dungeons & Dragons and dragons

Satan: That’s TWICE the dragons, you literally cannot go wrong with this

•

Asmodeus: What is the difference between falling in love and having a crush

Lucifer: If they get a haircut and they’re ugly it’s a crush

Satan: That’s a weirdly valid point

Mammon: Lmfao

•

Belphegor: In this world it’s yeet or be yeeted

Mammon: Yeeten?

Solomon: YOOT

•

Solomon: 100-200 years ago, people ate organic unprocessed food and didn’t have vaccines and lived to the ripe old age of died in child birth

•

Leviathan: When they show a scene from two seasons ago in the “previously on” you know something fishy is about to happen

•

Satan: It’s about time I contributed to the online discourse

Satan: Bricks are just domesticated rocks

Lucifer: Stop

•

Mammon: After a long day of work I accidentally greeted someone with my reflex customer service “hey how can I help you” and without missing a beat he accidentally said “hey what can I get ya” (he works at Starbucks) and that was the closest I’ve ever felt to someone

We were two NPCs who met irl

•

Mammon: Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them??? fat is like the grossest part of the meat

Leviathan: “Why hello there, little children— please follow me to my magical… FITNESS ROOM, NO P A N S I E S ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT. LEAVE YOUR WHINING AT THE DOOR BECAUSE ITS LEG DAY AND WE’RE ABOUT TO GET R-R-R-RIPPED.”

Lucifer: Because they’re always cooking said kids in cauldrons and ovens - aka long cooking times at lowish heat. If you do that to fatty meat the fat melts completely and the meat gets tear-it-apart-with-a-fork soft. If you do it to lean meat, you get tiny little sad meat bits that bring no joy to anyone

Satan: Well you did ask

Barbatos: Also there’s wisdom in fattening them up on sweets and other carbs. A meatless carb-rich diet makes for more tender and flavorful meat

Diavolo: You are arguing about the schematics of EATING CHILDREN

•

Diavolo: I failed a student for their midterm grade and they just sent me an email that just says “bruh”

Diavolo: Deadass

Bruh

Respectfully, Mammon

Lucifer: Can we appreciate the respectfully though

•

Mammon: When I drink alcohol everyone says I’m an alcoholic. When I drink Fanta no one says I’m fantastic

•

Simeon: I just heard two kids playing outside and one goes

‘I do not fear the dark side’

Then the other kid goes

‘YOU SHOULD’

and then I just hear a WHACK noise and then crying

•

Satan: I hate when adults make fun of u and ask if you bought your jeans with all the holes in them…why don’t you go fix all the holes in our economy, Lucifer

•

Asmodeus: When do you feel the most beautiful?

Lucifer: When a dog pulls on his leash on the sidewalk because he wants to come say hi to me

Last • Next

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Hey! Can you please write about Aizawa having a favorite American exchange student? And if you’ve already written that can you link it?

• He see's that you're also really fucking tired

• and he loves it

• First things first one of his favorite things to do is watch your facial expressions when someone says some dumb shit bc its literally his internal dialog

• and he knows DAMN WELL you can control your expression

• you just don't care too

• an obvious difference in culture

• western culture tends to be a lot less strict and tense than eastern

• and he likes to see you act in it

• Bakugou says something dumb? The look of pure disgust on his face literally has him leaving the room in fits of laughter

• Denki answers in class? Something really really stupid? The little head drop to the desk has him giggling

• Midoriya goes on some pointless rant? The expression that follows isn't one he can quite describe but it has him REELING

• He loves it, two days in you already have a rep for 'acting like an American'

• because you really haven't completely settled into culture in Japan

• which he'll totally help you with

• Anyway you eat lunch in his class

• Bc like Mic, he's just one of those teachers that lonely kids gravitate to

• You sit quietly in the corner for a few days

• and everyday he asks how you're doing and adjusting

• There's a drastic difference in how you treat him and the students

• He gets a lot more respect, polite smiles and nods of the head

• "I'm doing well- I still haven't really settled in though," you laugh sheepishly. "Haven't really made friends yet."

"Oh you'll get there, I'm sure,"

"Hope so,"

• He'll definitely shit talk other students with you

• He might not give out their actual name, but you have enough common sense to know who its PROBABLY about

• Your native language is English.

• his native language is Japanese.

• This can be problematic

• Because you'll be sitting in class and he'll be going over something and you'll be like ????

• just completely lost

• sir??? Sir what the fuck are you saying???

• equivalent of 'aye partipradact?? Aye partipiridact skarvern.'

• Because even though you studied Japanese (you kinda had to) being thrust into the country, culture, and language was a lot different than learning it in a classroom.

• lowkey really stressful

• so on days like that, you'll avoid looking around like a lost puppy and just pretend you're taking notes

• he knows tho

• he always fuckin knows

• so tutoring is a big thing

• thats partially what draws y'all closer

• you're in there 3 out of 5 days of the week after school (during lunch too) getting help for what you don't understand

• He'll absolutely have you help grade tests though

• Its great, you know all their secrets

• Denki's a lot smarter than he makes himself out to be, even though he's not making hundreds on the tests, he does really well on the free response parts

• You can usually tell you studied and who didn't tho

• great ammo tho

• For roasts n shit

• "Watch were you look, grape boy, I'm in charge of your test grades."

"Ha! Got em."

"You too,"

• Hizashi takes care of the literature part of tutoring (he also speaks English, he can clarify in a way you understand) and Aizawa takes care of math and history

• He has learned that math is your least favorite and your brain kinda shuts down when math is shown

• You and History vibe though, you love learning about it, just the language barrier can make it confusing sometimes

• This definitely leads to a lot more opening up

• Because well fuck, you're alone in another country, and you're teacher is really the only thing giving you security.

• So he learns a lot about you and about your country

• He'll definitely try to learn a little more English to help you out when he can

• He speaks a little bit, like if he was stranded in America he knows enough to survive with a tiny bit of small talk

• And he can understand more than he can speak

• Thats partially due to his own endeavors but also, hanging around Mic (who speaks fluent english) gets to him too

• He likes hearing about America

• Will dead ads listen to you ramble for as long as you want about it

• he likes the light in your eyes when you tell him about places you'd hang out at or your friends or secret spots

• knowing Aizawa means you know Shinsou

• extra training w them???

• yes.

• Shinsou becoming basically a brother??

• Yes

• Also becoming very close with Hizashi???

• lmao fuck ya

• #deadass family time

• Yall will literally go to lunch like its no big deal

• You and Shinsou falling asleep on each other's shoulder during movie day

• You're still gonna get heavy workload and strict parameters

• bc he wants you to succeed

• though if you need a mental day or it needs to be a little slower bc you're having trouble grasping the concept he's got you covered

• Ngl he gets pretty bummed out when you have to go back

• He's not gonna tell you that straight up tho

• Tho you have his number and he sends you off with a fuckin care package

• and he thinks that the last time he's gonna see you

• ever

• :(

• BUT SIKE

• YOU GET REAPPROVED TO GO BACK

• so you're only gone for like 2 months before you're back

• BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW THIS

• So there he is

• Sitting in his classroom earlier than usual

• Just making sure everything is set up right

• And you open the door quietly with a grin

"Hey old man,"

His eyes widened for a split second before he scowls, one with not true malice behind it, "I just can't get rid of you, can I?"

"Nope." Your grin widens. "You missed me though, don't lie."

"Hold on, why are you here?"

"I got reapproved to spend my second year here."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"Nope, it was a surprise. Wasn't hard to do though "

"I gave you that care package for nothing."

"No, I definitely ate all the food on it while I was on the plane."

"Whatever," he shook his head with a small smile. "Help me set up."

"Sir yes sir."

• and so he can survive another year because you're there to keep him sane

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Played the dlc- Sooga literally only has dialog with Kohga...and Impa. You know what I'm asking for. Make it happen.

I was gonna wait till after the shit from the dlc kinda cooled off, buuut thanks to @frankiesbugs, I'm kinda inspired??? So, let's see what I can do 👍

"Princess, Link, been a bit hasn't it?"

Master Kohga had come all the way from the Gerudo desert to Hyrule castle, upon being invited by Zelda. Ever since the calamity, the yiga and the royal family have been ever so slowly trying to mend their relationship. Master Kohga, ever kind and friendly, greeted the two blondes as if they had been friends for ages, but Sooga knew better. Being the second hand of the clan, he truly understood the feelings of his team.

He watched as Zelda embraced him, smiling ever so sweetly at his Master.

"Too long, Kohga! So glad you could make it. I hope you didn't eat before you arrived, the chef has quite the meal planned!"

"Eh I ate, but I'm sure I got room-"

Sooga leaned down to his Master's ear, keeping his voice barely above a whisper.

"Should we trust the very people who'd have us dead no more than a month ago?"

He tried to look up at the princess, about to excuse his Master from the meal, when he met the sharp, stubborn eyes of her servant. Impa. Impa and Sooga never saw eye to eye, and not just because she was far smaller than him. She put her hands on her hips, ready to give him quite a verbal lashing.

"Are you claiming our princess would POISON you? In her very home?"

"I believe the princess comes from a lineage of oppressive fools who put themselves upon a pedestal. Fools who have obedient little pets at their side."

Impa tried to step on the tip of her toes in order to make herself look so imposing. Sooga was tempted to teach her a proper lesson once her finger jabbed into his chest.

"You have some nerve, talking to her highness like that! Especially when all she did was invite you over for a meal! You act as if it's an assassination!"

"Depends; is SHE cooking?"

Impa was ready to lose it, and he was ready for it. Ready for who to make a fool of herself, prove the sheikah were just children with flashy tricks. Whatever game she wanted to play, he was ready to-

"Sooga. Apologize to the princess. We are her guest."

Kohga wasn't serious often. But with that tone, he knew his Master wasn't being playful. He muttered a swear under his breath, before bowing his head low to the ground, in a proper Yiga apology.

"I apologize, princess."

Kohga wrapped an arm around Zelda's shoulders.

"How about we let our bodyguards play with each other, cool things down a bit?"

Zelda looked over her shoulder to look at a displeased Sooga, and a worried Impa.

"Perhaps just Link then?"

"Eh why not, he's some eye candy. Sooga, behave, I'll summon you when I need you."

"Yes, Master Kohga."

Sooga and Impa watched as they disappeared into the castle. It wasn't until the doors shut that Impa glared at him.

"And my apology?"

"I don't apologize to riff raff."

Sooga wasn't dealing with this. He started to walk away from her. Least, he tried. Impa trailed close behind, clearly not trusting him to walk by his lonesome.

"And where are YOU going, Yiga?"

"A place where your nagging doesn't give me a headache."

Sooga walked outside of the castle grounds. He usually wouldn't stray so far from his Master, but he knew he could be at his side in just a second, so he gave himself a little leash room. He walked, her occasionally bugging him with her needless prattle. He kept walking, enjoying the feeling of walking through all those apple trees this area was known for. It'd be better if the other smaller footsteps weren't joining him, but life wasn't perfect.

"Where are you even GOING?"

"A walk."

Sooga had no idea what was her problem, aside from her being a Sheikah. 'Manners' this and 'yiga' that. He reached up to grab an apple from one of the trees, stopped, and turned around. She collided with his chest, and he watched as her eyes looked up from his chest, to meet his mask. She opened her mouth, and he stuffed the apple right in, silencing her. Who knew the birds were chirping at this time of day. He sighed as he walked on, hoping to passively ignore her.

But the Sheikah's never gave up, even in their best interest.

"Hey! If you're going to be near the princess, you CANNOT be ignoring her second hand!"

He turned his head to look at her, moving his body just in time for him to dodge her apple attack. He clenched his fist, starting to lose his temper. Bad enough he had to apologize to the princess, now he had to deal with this nonsense. He turned to her fully, stepping up to her until he was looming over her.

"I will make you understand something, Sheikah girl. I will not tolerate this foolishness. I don't know why you can't leave me be. I don't know why you insist on being SUCH a lapdog for your princess, especially when it makes you such a-"

"You act as if YOU are any better!"

She raised her voice at him, brow furrowed angrily. He thought about cutting her off, but she refused to relent.

"You follow him around like a lost puppy! He says sit, you sit, he says fetch, you fetch! 'Right hand of the Yiga' my ass! You're a pet! I'M a companion! A loyal, caring friend! You wanna know what makes us different? MINE doesn't look down upon me! MINE doesn't make me submit something to be owned!"

She was taking steps towards him now. Slow, yet bold steps that seemed to seethe with anger. Her eyes were focused on his very soul, and she had a snarl to her otherwise soft lips, as if she wanted to chew through his hide. He stepped back as she stepped forward, almost unsure how to handle this. It was like being threatened by a bluepee. Cute, yet oddly foreign.

"MINE gives me respect! You! You're nothing but a whiny, condensing, rude, crude, submissive PUP! You LIVE to get pushed around don't you? Held by the scruff like a DOG!"

He didn't know how far he had stepped, but it was enough to where he felt his back pressed up against a tree. He had no idea why but...he couldn't speak up for himself. Couldn't retaliate against such a demanding presence. Then it just. Happened.

She reached up, dug her nails into his scalp, and grabbed at his hair. He felt her small hands grab a fistful of his locks, holding him steadfast. Even as his feet slipped from underneath him, letting him fall on his ass, her grip was determined. She pulled his head back, forcing his gaze upon her. Her face was inches from his own, and he felt his heart thump violently in his chest. She was so...close to him now. It made him feel small, over powered.

"Look at you. You aren't fighting me. Where's all that bite, Sooga? Do you ENJOY it when someone handles you like this?"

Someone so small shouldn't be so strong. Small, taunt legs, tiny hips that could easily fit in his grasp. She looked weak. And yet, she assumed control of him. Her grip tightened, her nails digging into his scalp. It hurt. He should be fighting it. He was panting underneath her, body feeling like it was on fire.

"You insult me. You know what? I want my apology."

His mind was in a haze. Why was it so...hard. Everything was awfully, terribly hard.

"I. Said. I. Want. My. Apology. Even if I have to pry it from your mouth, I want it."

There was no resistance when she pushed her thumb against his lips, pushing her digit right past his lips. His mouth hung open, his tongue hung out of his mouth and drool smeared against her delicate looking hand.

"My. Apology. Sooga."

"I'm...sorry. So...sorry."

He watched as her hand slowly pulled away from him. She let go of him completely, wiping her wet hand on her clothes.

"Good. Now that I've made my point, I'm going to go check up on the princess. Because I care. Not like you, 'good boy'."

She turned to walk away from him, leaving him there under the tree. His head still ached, his mouth still hung out, his heart still raced.

He liked being a good boy.

[preciousmomentsfigurine]

honestly had a perfect day, only thing i wish i had squeezed in was a workout... time for me to reiterate how profoundly grateful i am to be back on meds... it’s the curse of bipolar and all the illnesses with psychotic features! it’s cruel! 

my manic brain loves to convince me that i’m truly invincible, and then when that mania gets so intense i’m a couple days without any sleep, hearing voices and faraway circus music, seeing figures appearing and disappearing in my periphery, in my doorway, coming closer and closer to me but i’m unable to react, when i close all the blinds and stop answering the phone, going seven or more days without leaving my house or seeing another human being, when my mind is racing with so many epiphanies and ideas and delusions that i begin to lose the ability to generate coherent speech, let alone thoughts that make any sense at all... 

you get so lost in the noise that you just want to end it all, you desperately want to sleep, to be relieved of the chatter and to sit still. the depression that follows isn’t nearly so bad. 

and then, when you manage to live thru one it, you forget how bad it was. you say, i’ve learned from this. i’m going to work so hard this time, it can’t and won’t be worse than that. but each episode is worse than the one before. i am shocked this last one didn’t kill me, and i have little confidence the next one would be survivable. 

and i swear throughout the whole experience that this is better than just taking the fucking meds. that this is just “me” - that i’m an intense, sensitive, rollercoaster of a person, and i can/should embrace that. i think that meds are the enemy because in truth, i believe i am fearful to know and potentially love and be seen as a version of myself that *isn’t* this way. a version of myself that is healthy and can feel emotions on a spectrum that won’t literally kill me one day. 

because life and survival itself is quite frightening to me, bearable or not. yeah, i guess i’m attached to the sickness, because i believe - counterproductively - that that’s what it means to be alive, for me. is that what it is? 

but now that i’m back on meds, i mean, i felt immediately lighter. my inner dialog immediately became intelligible and clear instead of cripplingly overstimulating. i slept. i ate. i was able to do my chores and open emails. i was able to finish things that i started. i called friends, and my friends could follow my speech, and i went outside. the fear, the paranoia, mostly dissolved. i feel a sense of hope, and that’s the most powerful part of it all. i need to remember: *this* is living. and maybe, this is the real me. regardless, i pray i pray i pray i don’t forget how much relief and joy and gratitude i feel right now

[beardycarrot]

Alright! Now that I’ve finished Aliens Ate My Homework (kids’ books really are just a couple hour read for an adult, huh?), I have in mind some things that I think are important for the movie adaptation to stick to.

The look of the characters should be the easiest thing to nail... their outfits probably won’t match what’s described in the book (movies always feel the need to change that in some capacity), but I don’t really care about that. What I’m more interested in is how they portray the less humanoid characters. Pong, Grakker, and Snout can all be played by actors in costumes, but Tar Gibbons is described as having a lemon-shaped body with four legs, a long neck, and a turtle-like head with bulging bug eyes; that’s gonna be a fully CG character.

The other is Phil, a potted plant. Basically a big stalk covered in leaves and vines, with a flower where a head would be, who moves around with thrusters on his pot. He has a symbiotic relationship with creature called Plink, described as kind of a blue cat-monkey. I really like how this illustration portrays it; even if it looks more like some kind of cartoonie bug, I would be perfectly happy if this is the design the movie goes for. These two are also going to be fully CG, so unless they base it entirely on the description provided for Plink, base its design on an illustration from another artist, or just do their own thing with it, I can’t imagine them finding a way to mess these designs up... but who knows.

BKR, the evil alien, should be interesting. He’s described as having blue skin, pale orange spikes covering his head (I was picturing maybe a dozen four-inch-long spikes, but the spike density could also be interpreted as covering his head like hair), and... otherwise, looking like Shirley Temple? That’s gonna be interesting, but this is also the character I expect them to take the most liberties with. I can’t say why... maybe just from experience with this kind of adaptation.

There are a few major plot points that I think they have to adhere to. First, that the good aliens’ ship is malfunctioning (the illustrations portray the ship as a traditional flying saucer, but I don’t think the design matters much) and they’re stuck shrunken to two inches tall until the end. That’s... basically the only reason for Rod, the protagonist, to be involved. The aliens need to repair their ship, so Rod has to carry them around to investigate BKR.

Secondly, they need to eat his homework. It doesn’t have to be the papier mache volcano and math assignment portrayed in the book, but, I mean, it IS the title of the movie.

Grakker and Snout have an unspecified relationship... Snout is very, VERY clearly based on Spock from Star Trek (in fact, I think the third book in this series is called The Search for Snout, a play on the third Star Trek movie, The Search for Spock), so it might just be a close friendship, but they share a room on the ship while everyone else has their own, so who knows. At one point it’s mentioned that they’re “bonded”. Potentially Gayliens. I don’t remember what their relationship is like in later books.

Next, Rod is incapable of lying. There definitely won’t be a flashback to the traumatizing-to-a-toddler reason for it, but that’s Rod’s defining characteristic: he doesn’t, and can’t, tell lies. Who knows whether that will be included.

Finally, Rod’s dad having been missing for quite a while isn’t a huge part of the story, but it does play an important role. Him lying to Rod’s mom strengthened Rod’s inability to lie (you’re not told what the lie was, but it’s implied that this was the night he left), and towards the end of the story BKR claims to know where he went, and implies that he’s no longer on Earth. I don’t remember if this is a plot point in future books, but Bruce Coville did something pretty similar in My Teacher Flunked The Planet, so it could be. This is the kind of thing that adaptations will just arbitrarily change, though, so who knows.

So! With all that out of the way, it’s time to watch the movie!

...Okay, first thing’s first, the opening credits of the movie are set to shots of a model solar system, so I’m assuming that’s the replacement for the volcano. I’ll allow it. Also, William Shatner is in this movie? What? As who?? The only adult male character in the story is an android of a man in his thirties, and he’s only there for what would amount to two minutes of screen time at the end. Rod’s grandfather is mentioned, but only once, in the context of “this is my grandfather’s farmland”.

Alright, definitely a modern setting. I guess the model isn’t for a science fair, instead being something Rod’s filming on his smartphone with his mom, twin siblings, and... his dad. Now, this looked like is was going to be an adaptation fail, but it turns out this was a flashback to the night he went missing. Clever!

Less clever is this abysmal color grading meant to represent a dark and stormy night, and the fact that they live in a cul-de-sac instead of being out in the middle of some farmland... but that’s not that significant of a change.

For some reason the story now takes place in the winter instead of mid-May, making me wonder where BKR (in the guise of Billy Becker) is getting the bugs to smash against Rod’s head. More importantly, as revealed at the end of the book, most intelligent life in the universe is about three feet tall, which is why BKR is pretending to be a kid while hiding on Earth. Instead of being a foot shorter than Rod, however, he’s now taller. Weird. Rod also now has his cousin Elspeth staying with his family for winter break, for... literally no reason that I can think of. Elspeth is a character from the second book in the series, but she wasn’t even mentioned in the first.

Grakker isn’t quite book-accurate, but not entirely inaccurate either... except for the color of his skin. He’s supposed to be green. What the hell. They whitewashed an alien. On the upside, the dialog in this scene is all pretty book-accurate. Unfortunately, they lose a lot of points with Madame Pong, who is supposed to be a very calm, understanding, zen character... but comes across as a little condescending. Also, this:

What? What?? Why did they keep this book dialog, when the house is VERY CLEARLY part of some kind of housing development area? I legitimately have no idea what they were thinking.

I also have no idea what’s going on here. Elspeth is... I guess looking through family photos on a computer? Ignore the subtitles, that’s from a weather report on tv. What I’m curious about is what exactly is going on in the photo. That’s clearly Rod’s dad, from three years ago... but recent pictures of the twins? Did Rod’s mom, who apparently runs a pet photography business, Photoshop a family ski trip that never happened? Is that what’s being implied here??

We’re then introduced to the rest of the aliens, and... wow, I can’t describe my disappointment. Remember how I said Tar Gibbons and Phil would be fully CG characters? Yeah, that, uhh... that didn’t happen. I was hoping they would do as much of this movie with practical effects as possible, but I meant that in the “get good SFX people” way, not the “do everything as cheaply as possible” way. They’re literally both just guys in suits.

Yeah sure eye stalks and a thick neck are absolutely the same thing as bulging eyes and a long neck. More importantly, look at that clearly human body with extra legs just kinda hanging off the hips. Phil is just as bad. You can’t really tell from still frames, but yeah, he has two vines with leaves coming off of his human-body-proportioned stalk at shoulder level and moves like a guy in a suit... and for some reason, his flower is split into halves so that it can be puppeteered to move like a mouth. Despite the fact that in the book his flower doesn’t even play a part in communication. They could’ve easily just installed a light inside the flower and explained that he communicates through pod burps, and would’ve been perfectly book-accurate. Why make this specific change. Also, if you’ve read this far, you’re probably wondering where Snout is. Yeah, uh. Me too.

Anyway, they appear to have combined the characters of BKR and Arnie into one person to simplify things (but then why introduce Elspeth??), and for no readily apparent reason, changed BKR, which is pronounced how you would expect, into B’KR, pronounced... b’car. For no reason.

Good GOD is this movie cheap. I appreciate the set they created for the top of Rod’s desk, with the giant pencil and such, and obviously they’re going to use a green screen for scenes like this... but it looks SO bad in motion. Like, see how the shot ends at his knees? That’s because he’s very obviously running in place, in front of a green screen. Also, why are sixth graders learning about the Drake Equation, which concerns the statistics relevant to intelligent alien life in the universe, in math class? I guess it’s technically a math topic, but not the kind of thing you’d learn in pre-algebra...and for comparison, Rod’s math homework consisted of single-digit multiplication tables, the kind of thing you do in like, second grade.

I’m also not fond of the degree to which Grakker is a comic relief character. Like... throughout the book, he’s completely strict and serious, and most of the comedy comes from Phil, Gibbons, and Rod. The first time you see genuine emotion from him is when Rod accidentally injures Snout, causing Grakker to hold him tenderly and shed a tear (again, potential Gayliens).

This is supposed to be the inside of a thick black canvas backpack. Am I crazy? Did I not see the Universal Studios logo at the start of this movie? Why does it look like the cheapest of cheap made-for-tv movies? Anyway. They appear to have given Snout’s ability to slow time to Madame Pong, which is worrying. Did they just... remove Snout, one of most important characters in the entire book series? To what end? To fit in all the stupid pointless Elspeth stuff? If they were hoping to make sequels to this movie, well... bad news, because again, the third book in the series is called The Search for Snout. Okay, I gotta know, is he actually cut from the movie or just a surprise reveal for later?

Alright, I am now officially dragging this movie. Also, I guess we now know where William Shatner fits in... I hadn’t even noticed it was him. Also Also, is that furry pink lump with one eye supposed to be Plink? Why all the arbitrary changes? Did they just decide that since they couldn’t fit a person inside of it, they would give it no limbs at all? Why is it pink??

Eyyy. Roll credits! Yeah, I wish... I’m only halfway through this thing.

They made Rod’s best friend Mickey Asian, which is fine, he’s a very minor character and never really described in the book... but unfortunately, they also decided to make him Data from The Goonies. He’s an inventor. Because he’s Asian. Coooool character, movie. So far it’s lead to an unfunny Coke and Mentos gag and an unfunny Pop Rocks and soda gag (which resulted in projectile vomiting). They cut Snout out of the movie to make room for this stuff, mind you. I’m sure this is building up to some kind of payoff, but I’m pretty sure I’m not going to enjoy it.

Speaking of payoffs, there seems to be an implication that there’s some kind of paranormal activity at Seldom Seen, the hidden field on Rod’s grandfather’s property, and at Rod’s school. I can understand the field, in this version Rod’s dad definitely seems to be involved with aliens in some capacity, and that’s probably where he was keeping a ship or something... but the school is kinda inexplicable. Like, it’s covered in snow... and it’s the only place in town that’s seeing snow. I can only assume it’s BKR’s... sorry, B’KR’s doing, but I’m not sure why. Did they decide that being blue means he’s from a cold planet, and requires it to be cold wherever he is?

No idea what’s up with some of these changes. Instead of BKR’s house being like an unlived-in model home, it’s... a complete sty. The exact opposite of the book. Why. Also, that coffee table is completely covered in video game consoles... GameCube, Dreamcast, PS2, N64... but Rod says he’s got “all the latest video games”. Does he? Does he really? Was that line in the script, so the crew just bought whatever they could find? As for BKR himself...

I mean, I don’t see Shirley Temple, but it’s not bad! Rod wasn’t trapped inside a pocket dimension inside a CRT tv when he took his mask off, but they wouldn’t have been able to manage that scene with this budget anyway. So far, this is the only alien design I fully endorse. There WAS a point to him having a cherubic face in the book, but it’s never addressed, only implied, and I get why they would make him look more menacing.

In the book, BKR didn’t really have any goals. He just enjoyed being cruel for the sake of being cruel, and was hiding out on Earth because it was unlikely they’d find him there. In the movie, B’KR intends to destroy Earth by opening a wormhole (which is what’s causing the snow), and the good guys have about an hour to save the planet.

They kept another of Snout’s abilities, the Vulcan Mind Mel-- er, knowledge transferal, but gave it to Tar Gibbons. This is literally the only thing he’s done in the entire movie. For the record, this was originally the scene where Snout connects their minds, but Rod is startled by it and pulls back, causing Snout severe psychic harm and prompting the aforementioned emotional response from Grakker.

...They just had to get William Shatner to say Klingon, didn’t they. The climax of the movie is all him flying around spouting (sprouting?) plant puns, then Rod throws a banana cream pie (which was, apparently, part of someone’s science project) at BKR’s face... and finishes him off with foam shot from his papier mache volcano. I guess the shrunken spaceship expanding inside of a house, causing the roof to collapse and knock BKR unconscious, was too expensive violent for the movie... but why is getting him messy a solution to anything? Ah well.

Bruce Coville himself has a cameo as the judge for the science fair, which is nice. I think he might be the principal of the school... I didn’t really notice in the scene featuring the principal earlier, since that happened to be the projectile vomiting scene. I can only imagine he was honored to have his work recognized in this capacity... he’s a good dude, I’m sure he wouldn’t be as horrified as I am with the writing and quality of it.

Also the movie ends with the reveal of the actual size of the aliens... which is, uhh. About the size of adult humans. Hrm. Guess they just straight up decided not to get anything right, huh? Oh, and they reveal that Rod’s father actually is a member of the Galactic Patrol. So, that’s a thing.

Please don’t say that. God, was this movie bad. I would understand if they were passionate about bringing the story to more people and just didn’t have much of a budget, or if they made changes to better suit a visual medium, but that... is not what they did. I’m not the kind of person that demands an adaptation remains 100% faithful; if you want the experience of the book, you can just read the book. This, however, changes so many things. Like, in the book, BKR’s crime is cruelty. That’s the message of the book... that in truly civilized societies, kindness is the norm, and needless cruelty is a criminal act.

The characters in the book all either have depth to them or are interesting as sci-fi concepts, but the movie... Gakker is Mr. Slapstick, Madame Pong is Cool Collected Female, Tar Gibbons is... I dunno, wisdom obscured by things that just don’t translate into English and saying Warrior Science a lot (honestly the closest to his book counterpart, though HE was more interesting and actually did stuff), and Phil... yeah, just William Shatner saying plant puns. Bleagh.

Well, despite that end screen, it’s good to know that we won’t be getting any sequels. I mean, like I’ve already mentioned, Snout going missing is a major plot point in the second book, and the third is literally called The Search For Snout. What are they going to do, just skip to the fourth book?

...Oh hey, George Takei.

[ivakir]

9, 19, 20 for the honest meme

the be honest meme

What is your opinion on exclusivity? Do you practice it? Why / why not?

   I don’t understand completely what this means, because roleplayers usually give their own meaning to this word. As I understand it, for many this means that they will not play with the second version of a certain character (if it’s canon) or with characters with the same faces (lol). I get it why someone may practice it, like, you don’t want to play with other version of this character, because you already have the one, and it’s alright.

   At the moment I practice this with only one canon character. I should say that I rarely write with canon characters, and when I write with them, it is likely that I will be dropped as a partner, because Iv is a terrible woman who hurts fragile feelings + a mere OC, then I see no reason to practice exclusivity, if I am not sure about my writing partner. That is, I am open to playing with the same canonical characters, but until Ivakir has any special relationship with one of the versions of this character.

   As for face claims, I don’t look at them at all, though I hate some popular faces, because they are literally everywhere and I am sick of them.

Do you delete anon hate or post and address it? Why?

   The funny thing is that for almost five years I have never received anon hate here, given that I constantly write posts like: “roleplaying is about writing”, “can’t write - don’t waste the time of others” and so on. But this is due to the fact that I am an unpopular blog with a female character, so I am 100% sure that no one reads these posts. Wow... I can literally write whatever I want, but no one will read it, because it’s a blog of a female character. Or if someone doesn’t agree, then they don’t send hate, which is good.

   But I got hate on other websites. Anons can send you hate for literally anything. I usually answered them what I ate today and how I spent the day or “send hello to your mom ;)” if I have the mood to practice wit. Or I try to provoke them on emotions, because it’s the best feeling when you set someone’s ass on fire. Yeah, I am an evil person. These are quite normal answers for those people who send you shit or death threats for nothing. I am very indignant at how some here react to anon hate. They make excuses, say something like: “I’m sorry that you feel like that”. Damn, guys, the anons, who send you hate, are little piece of shits, they are nothing. They don’t want to hear your explanations, so stop treating them kind.

   The only thing I got here, which was not an anon hate but a comment, was about my writing style, the way I wrote character dialogs: the line didn’t begin with quotation marks, but with a dash. It was pretty funny to get such comments (from anons, not from certain people who asked me about it personally, I have nothing against them), considering that people, who use heavy formatting which makes almost impossible to read what they write, didn’t get anything about their writing style. I guess, it’s a good example of double standrats.

Have you ever felt pressured to write something you weren’t comfortable with?

   Yeah, I wrote about it here. So, if someone decides to kill their character for no reason (“I want angst!!! uwu” is not a reason) and without discussing it with me, then the thread will be dropped.

[theknightonabike]

I used to have a blog that had around 12,000 subscribers

I suppose this was an accomplishment. I have been told from some folks that it was a really useful and meaningful resource to them.

It started innocently enough. I just wanted to communicate with my friends. But it grew to something larger over time, at least for me. It turned into an ongoing public journal of a young man striving for proficiency in the art-form of swordplay, and the harder discipline of creating some form of meaning out of a chaotic, and sometimes very painful life.

I tried very hard to keep the pain out of my writings. Sometimes I was successful... mostly I communicated my own journey regarding my martial practice, and the changes and challenges that wrought in me. Certainly there were some profound changes, I learned who I was, how much pain I was capable of handling and moving forward in a metaphorical sense, and that gave me the courage or at least the stubbornness to move through the real pain in my life that wasn’t written about.

After my heart was broken with the corruption and disillusionment associated with the ACL, I was unable to continue writing and sharing.

That, coupled with the fact that aspects of my personal struggles had bled into my SCA life created an atmosphere inside my heart that I didn’t want to share anymore because sharing meant exposing very painful and personal struggles and heartaches.

Then, my Brothers Brad and Mark facilitated the opportunity to work on the oil pipeline. It was a fantastic, super difficult, lucrative, and rewarding experience that isolated me from my personal struggles. It was something to latch onto.

Then Monica opened the door for my current employment opportunity. This unique place created a way for me to almost literally disappear into an existence where I could isolate myself almost completely. It felt good..

But the painful things that I had and have to deal with simply waited. In the dark at the end of the day, they came back and ate at me.

I stopped caring for myself some ways. But I also found immense joy and fulfillment in the people I work with, and the ones I have come to love that were not a part of past personal nightmares.

These things are easy to focus on to the exclusion of dealing with past wounds.

I feel like the past two years has been exactly that... yes, my Brothers helped me stay alive by caring for me when I didn’t answer them, for continuing to want my companionship even when it was frustrating, and profound love did effuse my life.

But these problems remain, and they continue to isolate me from those things that I love in an unconscious way.

As in Battle, the only way to win through is to be painfully honest with one’s self regarding past mistakes, current landscapes, and what tools you actually have rather than what you think you have, or what you used to have.

I suppose that is what this is for me. No, I’m not going to share a litany or pity party crap from the past, but I cannot move forward without acknowledging them, and I cannot re-e communities that mean so much to me without the probability of old ghosts and embarrassments poking their ugly head out of the swamp,

But that’s what a Knight does. I have trained the majority of my life to be one of those people, and that is the battlefield upon which I find myself.

I’m not sure if any of this makes sense from an external perspective, but perhaps it doesn’t have to. Opening a dialog requires communication and honesty, and perhaps this is what I am trying to convey. I need to be honest with the world to be able to say the things I need to say; to be able to make the impact that I am supposed to make. Life is so very precious, and I have learned so many things; been given so many opportunities and been invested in by so many amazing people that it is cowardly to not share the voice I have been given because I am afraid of having to deal with past pain.

Living an artful life is, ultimately, all about vulnerability and honesty. We are put on this plane of existance to add our thread to the eternal tapestry of the universe, and if we are so afraid of the color our our thread that we stop weaving it with others, we are unworthy of the opportunity.

I want to honor those who love and invest in me, and so to do that I have to be vulnerable and honest.

I am sorry that I have been missing. I think I have been mourning things that I cannot verbalize and I have not shared. That’s ok. It’s ok to mourn. But I’m not dead yet, and I have things to say.

So it is time for another kind of courage. It is time to open my heart and splatter my paint on the canvas again regardless of what the critics say, or if I spill paint on the walls while I’m doing it.

If I don’t, the inevitable outcome is that the Divine will cut off my thread, and I will fade in the memories of those who mean the most to me.

I can’t go quietly into the dark because I’m afraid.

[peterstanslizzie]

Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.25 (Facts of Life)

We should give this trio a group name. I mean, Andi Mack has the ‘Good Hair Crew’, which comprises of Andi, Buffy and Cyrus. So, it’s only fitting that we give this group a name. Any ideas?

- Gordo has too many eggs in one basket; On top of having to finish three book reports and a science project, he decided to burden himself even more by joining glee club. This is so he can diversity his school resume with non-academic activities. 

- Side note: It’s cool that the writers acknowledged that Miranda had joined glee club back in episode 1.14 since it was kinda randomly thrown into that episode. 

- Mr. Escobar clearly isn’t impressed with his students’ singing chops and urges them to practice at home. After their glee club session, Lizzie suggests to her friends they should try out for the ‘Fact-athlon’. They don’t think it’s a great idea since Gordo is already under a lot of stress.

Getting a reward is always good motivation

- But when Lizzie brings up the fact that the winners will get a free trip to Miami, the tone suddenly shifts from nay to yay. Plus. this would be a nice addition to Gordo’s already packed resume. 

Bring it on ‘Fact-athlon’!

Preparation

- Lizzie and Miranda are busy studying and quizzing each other History facts in Lizzie’s living room. Gordo arrives and is supposed to bring donuts for his friends but he ate them on the way. That’s literally me lol. 

- Gordo mentions to them that they need to get a faculty advisor for their team. Lizzie suggests a teacher who has a huge head but apparently, Kate has already snatched him; So I guess Kate’s also competiting in the ‘Fact-athlon’. Luckily, Gordo says they have Mrs. Trimmer as their back-up. 

“What does a cannibal call a phonebook? A menu”. I don’t think jokes are Lizzie’s thing lmao.

- The next day in school, Gordo draws up a study plan that recommends 4 hours of studying each day in preparation for the upcoming competition. I have a lot of respect for those who are willing to put themselves through these kind of things, even if it’s all for a prize. 

- We come to find out that Mrs. Trimmer has left the country (for no stated reason...) and Mr. Dig will be replacing her as their advisor for the ‘Fact-athlon’. I think Mr. Dig is great and all but good luck to them lol. I will still give him the benefit of the doubt though. 

Team Lizzie vs Team Kate

- We come to find out later that ‘Team Kate’ comprises of her, Claire and Larry; Smart strategy to rope in Larry. Team Lizzie is about to start their study session with Mr. Dig and they brought in with them every math book they can get their hands on from the school library. 

- But with Mr. Dig, you can’t expect to have a conventional study session with him; The only study tool he’ll be using to teach math is a deck of cards. This doesn’t sit well with Gordo because he feels that they should be studying from books and not from playing blackjack. Gordo and I share the same sentiment on this. 

- But after getting teased by Miranda for being an “old man at 13″, Gordo decides to go along with Mr. Dig’s creative way of teaching Math, Science, English and History. And we then get to see a montage of him doing just that. 

No shade but Team Lizzie is just clowning around whilst Team Kate is actually doing the proper preparation for the ‘Fact-athlon’. Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Dig’s method of teaching by showing is definitely effective but when it comes to a trivia competition, cramming facts into your brain as much as you can in a short period of time is the best strategy. 

Day of the Fact-athlon

Team Kate is getting down to business but as you can see, 2 of the 3 members are a nervous-wreck

VS

Team Lizzie seems confident but maybe a little too confident

- The competition then kicks off with English History and Team Kate is owning Team Lizzie from the get-go. As expected, Team Lizzie doesn’t know all the black and white facts like the dates and names when it comes to historic events. 

- As Team Lizzie continues to get creamed in the ‘Fact-athlon’, Lizzie comes up with a plan to get out of the competition without forfeiting by telling Gordo to fake being sick and asking Miranda to trigger the water sprinklers. They follow the plan accordingly and manage to get themselves out of the embarrassing situation they were in. If I were them, I would be worried about getting punished for doing all of that lol.

I love how Gordo committed to his fake heart-attack though 

- After the whole fainting and water-sprinklers fiasco, Team Lizzie are sitting on the stairwell suffering from their epic defeat. Team Kate rubs in their faces that they’ve lost so badly that Mr. Dig is quitting as a teacher. Yikes! Now things are getting serious.

- The find Mr. Dig packing his things from the classroom and they plead with him not to quit. They tell him that they’ve learned a lot from him and he has shown them that learning can be fun and how seemingly boring subjects like World History can be interesting. Now that’s the ultimate goal of a teacher; To inspire his/her students.

- Also, it turns out that going to Miami wasn’t the best prize for Team Kate:

Kate got bit by sand fleas, Claire stepped on a sea urchin and Larry got extreme sunburn. Wow, they were really unlucky over there.

B-Plot: Matt and Lanny are Starting A Band

- In the kitchen, Matt asks his parents if they have any musical instruments lying around the house that they can borrow. Sam suggests his old guitar he had used when he was in his own band with his cousin and his friend called “Midnight Sam and the Love Patrol”. Matt, Lanny and even Jo don’t seem impressed with this and they even laughed at the idea that he was in a band. 

The song they were playing in this video was actually pretty good. I wonder if it’s an actual song in real life?

- Before I continue, I have always wondered why isn’t Matt in school for majority of these episodes whilst Lizzie is? I know this is a fictional show but it’s a funny pattern I’ve been noticing for quite some time now. 

- Anyways, they are holding auditions to find a third band member in the backyard and Matt’s parents seem to be okay with the idea; They are such chill parents, I can’t. After viewing a bunch of ‘meh’ performances (well I thought that the oboe player was pretty good), they finally get a good audition...from a grown man by the name of Rick Marotta.

This is an adult who wants to be in a band with a couple of kids....I have questions

- I looked up Rick Marotta and he’s legit a big-time drummer in real life! His credits include playing with Linda Ronstadt, James Taylor, Steely Dan, John Lennon (as mentioned in the show) plus Carly Simon, Stevie Nicks and Randy Newman. Woah, impressive! But anyways, he is the best one so far and he gets the gig! Later, they start playing together for the first time and let’s just say, they don’t sound too good.

- It then escalates to the point where Sam and Jo can’t even stand the sound of them playing anymore. It’s cute how they don’t want to disappoint Matt by telling what he can or can’t do but if I were them, I would definitely put my foot down and ask them to stop the ruckus. Like please.

- We fast forward two days later on Sunday and Matt’s band is holding their first ever live performance and I must say; They look stylin’:

And they gave an incredible performance. Bravo! Of course it’s unrealistic for them to get so good after a short period of time but hey, I can definitely let this slide. 

- In the end, however, Matt and Lanny want to move on to another hobby instead of continuing on with their band *facepalms

Overall Thoughts

- I really enjoyed re-watching this episode. They did a great job making an episode that centers around a ‘Fact-athlon’ quite entertaining. Plus, the writing and the dialog used in this episode was really witty. Kudos to Douglas Tuber & Tim Maile for writing this episode. 

- I also like how they showcased the contrast between traditional ways of studying versus interactive/non-conventional ways of studying. Obviously, the former is more effective when it comes to trivia contests/quizzes but the latter makes students enjoy and really soak up what they’re learning. I also have to give props to Arvie Lowe Jr. for doing a great job as Mr. Dig in this particular episode. I loved seeing the bond between him and Lizzie, Gordo and Miranda. Teachers like him are absolutely gold.

- As for Matt and Lanny’s storyline, it was pretty good. I obviously don’t care about it as much as I do with the A-storyline but I definitely have to give them credit for their performance towards the end of the episode; It was great and I also like how Matt/Lanny didn’t annoy me as much as usual lol. 

[8-bitgossip]

Quotations

Ambient Conversations:

“I fucking hate mosquitos. Can we get away from all of this stagnant water before we die of West Nile or some shit?”

“You know, there’s a really good hiking trail around here. If you just turn here��. And we’re going the other way. Nevermind.”

“Gotta love the wilderness, the sun, the rivers, the lakes, the idea that there could be a Chosen archer hiding in the trees just waiting to murder us.”

“...Yeah. Heights. This’ll be fun. Not. Can we uh -- get down. Like. Now.”

“So. Have you ever thought about what’s gonna happen when all this is over? People don’t even have homes to go back to anymore and what? Are we gonna hold hands and sing kumbaya and pretend this all didn’t happen? Like fucking hell.”

When Deputy Points a Gun at Them:

“Ah. So this is what betrayal feels like. Gotta admit I’m hurt Deputy.”

“Et tu, Brute?”

Holland Valley:

“Ah. You can almost smell John Seed’s entitlement from here. Or… maybe that’s just his cologne. Eau de Asshole.”

“The Spread Eagle. Did you know that Girl’s Night has karaoke? You’ll have to ask Grace to sing Man! I Feel Like a Woman! by Shania Twain. It’s a blast.”

“Ah yes. Open fields, straight roads, the perfect place for snipers to shoot at us while I can’t shoot at them. Let’s get a move on.”

“...you think that the general store ever got my shipment of books in before shit went south? No?” *sighs* “And I was so looking forward to finishing the last of Toni Morrison’s body of work.”

“Gotta admit, even though I don’t remember it -- one baptism was more than enough for me; evidently I cried the whole time. My childhood priest wouldn’t be pleased with me converting to some crazed religious cult. Catholicism is cult  enough for any one person.”

“You think we could convince some people to sneak speakers up by John’s house? And blast Oh John from their fucking radio station while he tries to sleep? It’ll be hilarious.”

After Being Captured By John:

1st Encounter: “Did you enjoy your dip in the bliss filled water? Was John everything you hoped for? Thank god for Pastor Jerome and getting you out of there before shit hit the fan.” 2nd Encounter: “God. John’s quite the drama queen isn’t he? Shouting for you over the loudspeakers, promising that God will lead him to you.” *snickers* “He’ll be sending you flowers and love poetry before you know it, Dep.” John’s Death: “Well, everyone in the Valley can breathe at least a little easier now… It’s just a damn shame about the lives lost in the process and all of the people displaced by the violence.”

Henbane River:

“Ah yes, just your good, old fashioned, brain melting hallucinogenic drugs that at the very least sends you on a bad trip and at worst, turns you into a fucking zombie. Just how I wanted to spend my Tuesday.”

“Oh good. I’ve been meaning to stop by and see Addie. I have to talk to her about the fucking alleged haunted house she sold me.”

“I swear officer! It wasn’t me! Don’t cart me off to jail!” *snickers*

“You know what fucking sucks the most about all of this? They blissed out all of the best swimming spots in the Henbane, so unless you want to get really high I don’t recommend it.”

“Do you have any idea how much I’d love to take a rocket launcher to that sanctimonious prick’s dick?” *pause* “On the statue, dumbass. Although… Now that I’m on the topic…”

“...Please tell me that you’re also seeing pink elephants and about a dozen Faith’s littering the sides of the roads. Oh god.”

After Being Captured By Faith:

1st Encounter: “You never take me anywhere nice, actually, I lied. Do not. I repeat. Do not. Take me skydiving off of that fucking statue. I will murder you.” 2nd Encounter: “Best be careful there Dep. The adrenaline can bring you back but… there’s always a cost. You gotta wonder what the cost of finding that Marshall and bringing him back is.” Faith’s Death: “It’ll take years for this place to get back to normal… All of that Bliss, in everything. It’s not just gonna go away, and we don’t even know the long term effects. What a fucking waste of life.”

Whitetail Mountains:

“I should stop by and see Will and Eli while we’re here… No one in that fucking Militia keeps themselves fed unless you bug them about it. Fully grown toddlers, I swear to god.”

“Guess I should be thankful that the Cult isn’t as concerned with book burning as other zealous religious groups -- I would storm the Veteran’s Center myself if Jacob tried to burn my books.”

“...Did you hear that howl? We should go. Before we end up as wolf chow. Or, we could stay and when the Judge’s come you stay there, and I’ll climb a tree and use you as a big, beautiful distraction.”

“So… You know that fucking eyesore of a Truck that Hurk Senior owns? A few months ago I dumped pink paint all over that shit. Hurk and Sharky thought it was funny… his daddy not so much. It was just detailed too. Such a shame, that.”

“For the record, if you’re planning on using helicopters to travel you can count me out, out of this county, out of this little group of yours, out of existence. There will be no heights for this woman in this or any lifetime.”

“Please tell me that you’re not actually going to get those records on the kid’s list. He has like, the WORST music taste. Literally give anyone else that job because I don’t know how much of What’s New Pussycat I can take.”

After Being Captured By Jacob:

1st Encounter: “Careful now, Dep. The mind is the one thing that’s really hard to un-fuck once you get it into a bad place so just… be careful. The reprogramming may not be so family friendly.” 2nd Encounter: “You ever think that people get tired of his whole, “I ate a man once”, shtick? Like. We get it, you’re the scary mountain gremlin who likes to murder people and train deadly wolves, we don’t need more than that.” Jacob’s Death: “...What happened was... unfortunate. But it’s over now. It’s all almost over.”

Intercompanion Dialog:

Nick

Nick: “Hey. So, Kim’s been meaning to ask you for that recipe you and Will brought to the last cookout.” Bridget: “The peach cobbler or the pudding shots?” Nick: “….Both. Definitely both. And make sure that you bring them both again next time. They were a lifesaver. Who the fuck brings pineapple pizza to a barbecue?” Bridget: “Evidently, the Seeds. As if we needed another reason to shoot them.” Nick: *laughs* “Right?” Bridget: “I’ll make sure to stop by the next time I have a chance, I’m sure that Kim would enjoy some new faces around.”

Grace

Bridget: “I managed to find a copy of Beloved for you if you’re still interested in reading it?” Grace: “Really? You found it before the Peggies lost their shit then?” Bridget: “Yeah, it was in the last shipment of books that came into the library before everything went post-apocalypse now.” Grace: “I’d love to read it, be nice to take my mind off of everything that’s going on.” Bridget: “Of course! I’ll bring it by 8Bit the next time we’re gonna meet up there for you to read. I promise you’ll love this one.” Grace: “You haven’t steered me wrong yet.”

Boomer

Bridget: “You know… I’ve always been more of a cat person myself….” Boomer: *whines* Bridget: “Don’t give me those --” *sighs* “Fine. Fine. You’re the only exception. Happy now?” Boomer: *happy bark*

Sharky

Sharky: “Hey so, Bridget. I have a question.” Bridget: “Hm?” Sharky: “Do you think that readin’ Shakespeare and Charles Dickens and shit would make me sound smarter?” Bridget: “Nope.” Sharky: “Seriously?” Bridget: “Sharky, it was like… the Simpsons of our times, people just like to act like it was smarter and better. Besides, you’re plenty smart by yourself and if anyone tells you different you can tell them to find me and I’ll beat the shit out of them with my twenty five pound Shakespeare anthology.” Sharky: *laughs* “Can and will do, ma’am.”

Adelaide:

Bridget: “So… About that haunted house you sold me…” Addy: “Ah, I was wondering when you’d figure that out -- technically no one’s ever died on the property and the hauntings are all just rumors that the town likes to tell.” Bridget: “It definitely explains why it was half of the price of every other house in Hope County.” Addy: “Darlin’ you always get what you pay for, and honestly, I think you and that man of yours got quite the steal on that place.” Bridget: “Uh-huh. Just know, that if I die, I have every intention of haunting you just so that you have to deal with those sort of shenanigans and whispers from the people in Fall’s End.” Addy: *laughs* “It’s a deal.”

Billy:

Billy: “So I say we just…” *inaudible whispering* Bridget: “Absolutely not! We are not going to panty raid the entirety of John Seed’s house and hang his silk underwear from his flag pole no matter how funny I think that is.” Billy: “Come on, think of the rage -- the pure unadulterated fury that he’ll have at seeing his glorious black silk boxers hanging from every available surface in the Valley.” Bridget: “Do not. It’s too fucking tempting.” Billy: “You know you want to.” Bridget: “You’re the absolute worst.” Billy: “That’s not a no.” Bridget: “Fuck you.”

Peaches:

Bridget: “Hey! You want some treats?” Peaches: *cougar noises* Bridget: “I talked to Chad and he gave me the scraps from the latest roadkill he’s gotten and I’ve saved it for my favorite kitty.” Peaches: *happy cougar noises* Bridget: “Yup! It’s all for the best murder machine in the Henbane.”

Hurk:

Hurk: “So you’re sure you’re not interested in Hurk’s Gate?” Bridget: “Nope. I’m pretty good where I’m at, plus, Jerome would be out a Youth Pastor if I did.” Hurk: “Well, I guess you could still stay with the Youth Pastoring thing, helping the youth and all of that is important, plus you could start recruiting them to Hurk’s Gate.” Bridget: “Still gonna pass.” Hurk: “Huh. Gonna have to do the hard sell on you, huh? Well, what if I told you that there are tons of beautiful men and women who are --” Bridget: “Hurk, I’m gonna stop you right there. My grandmother was Irish Catholic, were I to convert to anything she’d come down from heaven just to beat the ever living shit out of me.” Hurk: “Respecting the wishes of your grandma I can get that. Yeah.”

Jess:

Jess: “Hey, thanks for letting me crash with you and Will for the last few months, it’s been… a lifesaver. Really.” Bridget: “We know how hard it’s been, I’m glad to see you getting back on your feet… Well, as back on your feet as you can get given the circumstances.” Jess: “It’s crazy, all this shit goin’ south with the Peggie’s is what it’s taken for me to get my life back in order… It’s almost surreal.” Bridget: “Well, if you ever need us, our door is open and the spare bedroom is yours.” Jess: “Thank you, Bridget.’

Ashlee:

Bridget: “So. When all of this is over, we’re having a party. A big one.” Ashlee: “Obviously.” Bridget: “My first thought is at the lake, but then I’m like, “but wait, we live in the middle of nowhere, our only sources of entertainment are drinking and shooting things” which means that I’d spend my time worrying about people accidentally ending up in the water and drowning.” Ashlee: “A fair point, but may I just say that they’re all fucking adults and should know better. We’ll grab some trucks to put along the waterfront to play music and block the way into the water and then people will have to think to get in.” Bridget: “An excellent idea. This is why I keep you around.” Ashlee: “And here I thought it was because I was attractive and intelligent company.” Bridget: “Always. Heart emoji” Ashlee: “Did you just---” Bridget: “Don’t.”

Cheeseburger:

Bridget: “Cheeseburger!” Cheeseburger: *bear noises* Bridget: “You know, every time we’re out here, I’m always surprised that the deputy hasn’t had a saddle made to ride you into battle like the majestic beast you are.” Cheeseburger: *bear noises*

[drippingbrainstories]

The Search For Female Nipple Pigs

 I truly believe that the love of nipples comes from our love and fascination  with the female breast and nipples and specifically our mother's breasts and  nipples. My mother had very big breasts and nipples that were naturally about  3/4 of an inch long and grew to at least an inch long when excited and erect.  I admit that as a child and young man, I was fascinated by my mother's big  tits and huge, stiff nipples. I would try to get a look at them whenever I  could. I think my mother was aware of my fascination and would tease me with  chances to view them quite often.    As I got older and sexually active, my mother played a big part in my love of  nipples and nipple play. That's another story that I'll tell at a later time.  Suffice it to say, that I've always been on the lookout for women who had the  kind of desire and need for nipples and nipple play that I have. So far my search  has only yielded very few, but those have been very memorable. One stays in  my mind and is the benchmark for my search for female nipple pigs.    Every now and then, I place an ad on Craigslist looking for nipple centric  females that live for nipple play and need to have their nipples pleasured  endlessly. It's not about fucking..........it's about delivering pleasure to  the female breasts and big nipples that fulfills their desire for nipple  pleasure.    As I said, I have a benchmark, and this one came from a response to one of my  Craigslist ads. I made clear in my ad that I was a male nipple pig who pumped  his nipples and loved big nipples and nipple play with men and women. I made  clear I was looking for a woman with big tits, and large nipples who knew what  she had and that they were in need of lots of attention. I made clear that  there would be no vaginal penetration although I did say I loved to deliver  oral sex including sucking on a hard clit while I worked on those big tits  and nipples.    Within an hour of placing the ad, I received a response entitled "Where  Have You Been All My Life" She told me that she came across my ad and  had read it multiple times, the last few times, with one hand rubbing her  dripping cunt and rock hard clit, and the other going from nipple to nipple,  pinching and pulling on her big, stiff, nipples until they were aching for  attention. She asked me to please write her back and start a dialog, which I  immediately did.    We exchanged a couple of messages during which we made clear our love of  nipples and nipple play. I asked her if she knew what it meant to be a nipple  pig and she replied that it was a person who desired, loved, and needed  nipple play above all other sexual contact. Well........I was hooked. I found  a female nipple pig. We exchange phone numbers and talked on the phone for  almost 2 hours during which time we relayed our various life experiences and  what we most desired. She made very clear that she was concerned about  whether I would be accepting of the way she looked and what she enjoyed. We  decided to meet in person at a local pub and have a beer and see if we really  liked each other. For the sake of brevity, the face to face went well and we  both admitted that our nipples were rock hard and we were both wet with desire.  We decided to go for it.     We went to my place and she asked me to give her a couple minutes in the  bedroom before coming in. I waited until she called to me. I stripped off my  shirt and entered the bedroom. She was laying on my bed naked, her body completely  tan with no lines. Her legs were slightly spread and I could see how wet the  lips of her cunt were and her clit was sticking out hard and wet. She was  cupping her huge, firm tits, and her huge nipples were almost 1/2 inch in  diameter and 3/4 of an inch long on dark areolas. She smiled at me and  said.... WELL? I was speechless and just stood there admiring the site while  my own hands went to my stiff nipples and started teasing them. That caused  her to moan as she started teasing her own nipples while watching me.    She asked me if I would do one thing before we got into some serious nipple  play. I said sure and she leaned over and pulled a razor out her purse and  asked me to shave her cunt for her as it got her really hot. I obliged and by  the time I was done, her cunt was literally drooling juice and her clit was  as hard as my cock. The whole time I was shaving her she was massaging her  big tits and pinching and pulling on her fat nipples. After changing my  concentration from shaving her cunt nice and smooth to her tits and nipples,  I noticed that her nipples had swollen bigger than a 1/2 inch wide and  lengthened to almost an 1 1/2 long and rock hard. She saw me starring, and  asked if I thought she looked gross. On the contrary, I was stunned, my heart  was pounding, and my nipples ached and my cock was literally pumping out  juice.    To answer her question, I stood up and unbuttoned my jeans and let them fall  to the floor exposing my rock hard, twitching cock, that had a stream of cock  juice running down the shaft. I grabbed both of my rock hard nipples and  pulled and pinched them which made my cock twitch and jump and juice splatter  on her stomach and dripping cunt.    She smiled and said I guess you like.........let's get to it. I sat next to  her on the bed and cupped her big solid tits and leaned over and licked both  her huge nipples, causing her to moan and thrust up her tits towards my  mouth. I couldn't resist and took one of her nipples in my mouth, filling it,  and started sucking on the huge teat. She started whimpering and her hands  went to my nipples where she started flicking, pinching, and pulling on them  as I went from nipple to nipple, nursing like a hungry child.    Over the next 3 hours, we worked each others nipples with hands and mouth. I  licked her dripping cunt and sucked on her clit while milking her huge udders  and she sucked my cock while milking my big man nipples. At the end, I made  her cum at least 6 times and lapped up as much of her cunt juice as I could.  She sucked me off and ate my cum 2 times. We satisfied each others  "nipple hornys" and parted ways. We exchanged a couple emails  telling each other how the experience would be remembered forever, and never  met up again.    If you are a female nipple pig like this, I want to get naked and nipple  horny with you. I know you are out there. I'm here waiting. Come to  me...............

[xinnamoon]

Night (Blush Blush Dialog)

Some silly dialogs I made for my Oc Night if he was part of the Blush Blush Manimals. Fair warning: This is a long post.

link to first post of Night to see what he looks like and general info: https://agoatonthemoon.tumblr.com/post/634991678437146624/blush-blush-oc-night

Animal form

As you continue to search for manimal, you find a cute little cat curled up and sleeping up in a tree. Last time you saved a cat it wasn’t a manimal, but the second time the charm. 

The cat woke up, stretching and yawning, appearing to be a normal cat. That is until he started talking in a sexy voice too sexy for the little kitty he appears to be.

“Heard there was a cutie around helping guys who transformed into animals and wanted to see them for myself. That’s you right?” 

You nod your head in agreement. You then ask if he needed help.

“Oh me? You don’t actually need to fix me if you don’t want to, I’m good either way. But you can help me by letting me follow you around for references I need for my new erotica ‘My lover, the beast: hot and wild with the beast within.” 

You decided to accept this fluffy wuffy kitty cat offer, what can go wrong?

Adversary:

“No talk, me angry. Just kidding, but I did want to take advantage of my fluffiness to add to my overall cuteness. You can’t do this kind of stuff when you are my age without some shame, haha.”

Acquaintance:

“What’s new pussycat? Besides my inability to write feverish about this whole ordeal, I’m doing great for myself.”

Friend picture:

The two of you went to the park for inspiration as Night rides on your shoulder. There he says: “How lovely. And I don’t just mean the scenario. I wouldn't mind spending more time with you.”

Frenemy:

“Ah it seems we are frenemy now, like how I’m frenemy with this one mouse who always slips through my paws. Hopefully this time around, I don't get an anvil dropped on me, or another wacky bodily harm along those lines.”

Friendzoned:

“Hey I see you over there, eyeing up my fluffiness. But I must warn you, if you pet me in the wrong spot in the wrong direction at the wrong time when I don’t feel like it, I will have a hissy fit.”

Talk:

“Curse these tiny little beanies! Totally adorable but makes writing an absolute nightmare.”

“I’m not grumpy, it's just my resting cat face.”

“Oh, I just had a brilliant idea but i just lost it. Can you get me my brainstorming cap? It's a cute little hat for this cute little cat. “

“I know you keep warning me not to climb up trees, but I can’t help it! It is not my fault that the tops of trees get the best sunlight. Of course it’s a little my fault that I forget I’m afraid of height and can’t get back down. Tell your bull friend I say thanks too, for all the bull I put him through.”

“A tiger? A panther? I feel like I’m on the short end of the stick here. Though, if they are willing to have a sleep pile, I’m game. Of course, I would prefer to be on top so I don’t get crushed.”

“Once, a kindly elder woman saw my plight, adopted me, took care of me with utmost care thus forming a beautiful familial bond, and when she was lying peacefully in bed with me cuddled up with her, she wrote in her will I got her whole estate. Soon she passed, possibly making me the richest cat right now. I’m like an aristocrat cat, huh.”

“A sink, a box, a bag. You see them as simple household objects, but I see them as my favorite sleeping spots. As they say, one man's trash is another man's treasure, which means: please don’t trash them, I really like them.”

“Come rub your face in my fur. Trust me, it’s worth it.”

Poke:

“I know I’m fluffy but you gotta quit it. I got retractable claws and I’m not afraid to use them!”

Gift: 

“Aw thanks! I’ll make sure to repay the favor. I will give you any mouse or bird I happen to find. Sounds like a fair trade.”

Date:

Dinner: “I don’t know why, but I've such a craving for lasagna, I ate more than I should. Hope the vet doesn't put me on a diet.”

Roller coaster: “I was on the edge of my seat! Literally! I had to keep reminding myself to ‘hang in there baby’.”

Boat: “Has no one ever told you cats and water don’t mix? Because let me tell you, cats and water really don’t mix. Now it will take forever to dry all my fluffy fur.”

Haunted house: “Eh not that scary to be honest. But you know what's really scary? cucumbers. I just get the chills from thinking about them.”

Half animal/ half human 

“Ah of course the old kissing to transform back into human, a tale as old as time. You know it’s a wonder why we didn’t try this sooner.” “Oh well, no need to rush this tale. Luckily it’s not as long or as fluffy as mine haha.”

Kissing picture:

“Then please humble this old cat with a kiss, only true love nuzzles can save me now.” Sparkles, bubbles, and a sexy man with cat ears, oh my!

Awkward besties:

“I’m nearly pushing my 30s, so I think it would be more appropriate to call me a cat man rather than a cat boy.”

Crush:

“It would seem that between you and me, we are in a game of cat and mouse, where fittingly I’m the cat and you’re the mouse. However, instead of hunting for sport, I’m just pinning for your affection.”

Sweetheart:

“Sweetheart, pumpkin, honey, darling, doll, baby, kitten. There are so many cute nicknames to call you. But hopefully you are willing to call me ‘yours’.”

Boyfriend:

“Being with you has honestly been the most fun I had in all of my years of existing. No amount of fiction can even compare to the craziness of your life. And I am here for it!”

Talk:

“Cat ears and tail? Quick get me a maid outfit, I might open up a café.”

“Quick question, did any of your manimals look at my search history? Because I think they might have gotten the wrong idea of me and might have put me on the FBI watchlist.”

“Ah, how tragic. I can’t resist the urge to snuggle up and lay on my keyboard. Now I have to rewrite everything again.”

“Not gonna lie, I kinda missed the fur. It was like a snuggie attracted all the time to my body which made napping so much harder to resist.”

“I know what you’re thinking and the answer is yes, I do rub my face in my tail sometimes. It's just so soft and silky.”

“I keep forgetting I no longer need to stick my face in a glass to reach the bottom.”

“Shh, don’t tell anyone I say this but sometimes I use my tail as a pillow. You can use it too as long as you keep this between you and me.”

“Well would you look at the time. It’s nap o clock! I know a great sun spot if you want to join.”

“Been talking with some others and I have come to the conclusion that everyone does indeed want to be a cat.”

“Mind if I sleep in your lap? I got kinda addicted to it since my cat form. Don’t worry, instead of 5 hours, I’ll only be sleeping there for 4 and a half.”

“You know as a half cat half man abomination, I feel I should join the Broadway musical about cats. I feel like I would fit in real nicely.”

“Currently writing a screenplay about my life. I’m calling it: Life of a Cat. Think it will win an Oscar?”

Poke:

“I’m not a cute little kitty anymore, so you won’t get any endearing moment if you keep doing that. Instead you just get a grown ass man giggling his ass off. Actually, maybe that was your goal, in which case good job.”

Gift:

“This is the most amazing thing I have ever received. Oh I mean the item is alright, but this box is truly a splendor to behold!”

Date:

Dinner: “Finally, some good freakin food. Being a cat really opened my eyes and appreciation for the joy of a fancy feast.”

Roller coaster: “I heard situations like these give rise to the suspended bridge theory, where one mistake the racing heart beat of danger for that of love. So, wanna take a guess on what I’m feeling right now?”

Boat: “Ah, the sun on our skin, the wind in our hair. Really makes you want to take a quick nap. Of course the last time I did that in the middle of a lake, well it didn’t end pretty, let's just say.”

Haunted house: “Good thing I watched a bunch of scary movies to prepare for this. Now all I gotta figure out what type of horror lies in wait for us. Oh how fun!”

Masquerade: “Despite what they tell you, cats do dance. So come and let us dance, dance, dance, our tails off.”

Human

As you witness Night napping on a couch, you get closer to put a blanket over him. Just then, he grabbed your arm to pull you into a cuddle. 

“Ha! I didn’t know that trick would actually work. Now that I got you here, mind if I give you a little kiss?” 

With a small peck of the lips, the magical explosion went off. The curse had been lifted, huzzah!

“It seems our story is coming to its end. Thank you for letting me experience such an incredible one. It was just like a fairy tale, and it truly inspired me greatly. But it wouldn’t be fair to leave my muse with nothing, so take this selfie of me and let it inspire you like one of your French girls.” -Night

Sex scene:

As you witness Night napping on a couch, you get closer to put a blanket over him. Just then, he grabbed your arm to pull you into a cuddle. 

“Ha! I didn’t know that trick would actually work. Now that I got you here, mind if I give you a little kiss?” 

With a small peck of the lips, the magical explosion went off. The curse had been lifted, huzzah!

But even with the curse lifted, Night didn’t let go of the embrace, instead tightening it so you can feel his erection pressing against your junk. “Night’s long, and very very hard,” He remarked. Night rolls you onto your back as you both make out on the couch. The two of you feverishly take off all your clothes, exposing both your sexy bodies to one another.

“I’m planning to keep you up all night, and I know you will most certainly keep this Night up for a while.” He chuckled as he pointed to his dick. Despite the cheesy puns, he was raring to go. And indeed you and him made sweet sweet love until the break of dawn. You both came three times before collapsing in his arms. He strokes your hair and whispers praises for you. As you drifted off to sleep, Night whispered, “Sleep well my love. For we are gonna continue right where we left off afterward.”

Lover:

“If this was a romantic comedy like I hope it is, that means we finally overcome our problems to live a fulfilling life happily ever after. Then we have the sequel everyone forgot about, but a great third that wraps it all up.”

Talk:

“I may or may not have written a 300 pages nsfw fanfiction about us. Just don’t search up the ship “Nightmellow”, okay?”

“As an author I’m well versed with the 20 letters of the alphabets. Oh it seems I forgot URAQT. And don’t worry about the D, I’ll give it to you later.”

I’ve learned something neat as a cat. Apparently if you rub your body against something, it automatically becomes yours. So why don’t you come over here so I can rub myself all over you.”

“It seems that as a cat, I left you with some scratches. To make up for it, you can leave some on me. Specifically on my back.”

“I’m glad to have my normal tongue back, it’s a lot smoother than the sandpaper one of a cat. Speaking of which, my tongue wasn’t the only thing I’m glad that went back to its smoother state.”

“Me, Eli and Dimitri have started a book club and you are more than welcome to come. Of course, if you’re there, we won’t only be reading books if you catch my drift.”

Poke: 

“You know cats are quite picky when and where you are allowed to pet them. But for me it is whenever and wherever you desire, Dear.”

Gift:

”Aw, this is really sweet. But not as sweet as the great ideas you have given me. Come on, let’s go try the 1001 ideas I had in mind.”

Boxer:

“What’s your star sign? You might be able to find the constellation if you look at my junk long enough.”

Naked:

“Am I naked? Yes. Am I afraid? No. Am I horny? Oh very much so.”

Halloween: 

“I’ve been told that all dogs go to heaven and all cats go to hell. As a former cat, I refuse to give in to the stereotype. That is why I appear before you as an angel, and I assure you, seven minutes with me is all you need to see heaven itself.”

Interaction with Cole:

Cole: 

“Your friend Night is quite … peculiar. It would be quite ironic if he were to suddenly disappear like the victims detailed in one of his many mystery novels.”

Night:

“Sufferin Succotash! I tawt I taw a puddy tat. I did, I did! Haha joking of course, but yeah I’m definitely being stalked.”

“Yeah I got stabbed, but what they don’t know is I have 8 other lives! Haha, who knew my plot armor would come in handy.”

“This whole stalking situation has given me great inspiration for a new thriller story. The only problem is that I might have scared off my stalker with what I searched up for references. Know any ways I can lure them back in? I got some ideas to test on them.”

“With this stalker on my tail, I came up with 20 ways he can kill me, and in return I came up with 40 ways to defend myself from those 20. You always gotta think like a criminal to beat a criminal. Am I overthinking it? Yes. But have I ever been killed? No. Check and mate.”

“My little stalker friend hasn't done anything recently. Maybe they realize how futile it is to kill such a genius writer. Or they just realize I have no sense of self preservation that they figure I might as well kill myself for them. Either way, my win.”