#it needs to understand why and how something happens or it will drive him crazy | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ikeuverse · 9 months ago

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you hate me, universe? | sjy

pairing: jake x fem!reader genres: smut, fluff, slight angst, a pinch of humor wc: 9.4k+

꒰ 𝅄 warnings ꒱ : swearing, drinking, sexual tension for a while. jake is frustrated for the most part (poor thing, let's understand him here). unprotected sex, oral sex (f. receiving), holding the neck, but no hanging. cum inside (make it safe and cover it up), aftercare. lmk if i forgot anything.

꒰ 𝅄 synopsis ꒱ : how much the universe could hate you and jake to conspire against you every time you two came close to kissing? it was driving him crazy, jake needed to do something about it.

꒰ 𝅄 notes ꒱ : i honestly don't know how this idea came about, it just popped into my head and i let it flow. it was something so natural, so i just let it happen and here it is. i hope you like it!

꒰ 𝅄 masterlist ꒱

Anyone in their right mind could tell what was between you and Jaeyun whether it was the extremely palpable sexual tension or the mutual desire that coursed through both of you as you became closer and closer.

It was always like that. Ever since the day Sunghoon introduced the two of you as an excuse for his best friend to meet new people. Not in a sexual sense because he didn't want to interfere that much, but he also knew that Jaeyun needed to talk to someone other than him and Heeseung. The boy was completely lonely and it was driving him crazy.

The idea of you becoming someone to talk to, since you were the social butterfly of the group, fit like a glove. So well that Jaeyun quickly opened up to you and the two of you started chatting. But he was so much calmer than Sunghoon and Heeseung when approaching.

Jaeyun was subtle when he arrived, making eye contact first before greeting people. He would say hello to everyone until he sat beside you and brushed his hand against yours to get your attention. At first, it was innocent, you would even intertwine your fingers in his quickly as a response to the greeting, Jaeyun maintaining the grip for a while before being interrupted to greet other people.

What changed was that Sunghoon and Heeseung weren't like that with you. The two of them would come and hug you, and Heeseung would mess up your hair because he knew you'd complain, he liked to annoy you. But no one was able to hurt you because he would break up with anyone. Sunghoon treated you like a little sister, not least because he was dating your best friend and you were responsible for introducing the two of them. He was grateful for that, so he always took the best care of you, hugging you from the side and running to his friend.

Whereas Jaeyun never held anyone's hand during greetings. He didn't make a point of touching anyone other than you or his friends for a quick handshake. That sparked something in you… So this was something just for you and him? An intimate thing that you could call yours and Jaeyun's alone?

Not to be hasty or emotional, you never even asked him, not least because it might put him off or simply make him stop holding your hand. You remember the first day before you met him when Sunghoon told you how shy Jaeyun was around anyone. That's exactly why you approached him: so that he could meet and talk to more people.

But the touching of hands became the least of your problems when you and Jaeyun started to get more physical. He didn't mind holding your waist as he walked up to the bar of the nightclub where you two were with your friends, whispering in your ear whatever silly conversation you and he were having at the moment. You'd notice the way his eyes would leave any corner of the room to focus only on your lips, even if you weren't saying anything. Just listening to him and the words coming out of his mouth.

It was a game of cat and mouse where you and Jaeyun were cornering each other more and more until you couldn't take the pressure.

If you asked him what was going on, he wouldn't hesitate to say that he wanted you. He doesn't know when it started, whether it was the first look you gave him in the living room of Sunghoon's apartment or the warm and welcoming way you greeted him. But Jaeyun was charmed at that moment. He was truly enchanted by you.

Your beauty was unreal and he lost count of how many uncontrollable, low sighs came out of his lips every time you did the slightest thing.

Get a grip Jaeyun, she's Sunghoon's friend and she's being nice to you. He was trying to convince himself of this because a shy university student who didn't have many friends would never win over a woman like you. Outspoken, self-assured, smiling and so beautiful. Not to mention every curve of your body that he swore he wouldn't pay attention to, but it became more and more impossible as he spent more time with the guys and with you.

Jaeyun was terrible at hiding the fact that he was staring, sometimes with Heeseung's help with a gentle push. A push or a hold because you could tell. Not that Heeseung wanted to stop Jaeyun, he was a great supporter of the – almost – couple, but he also wanted to know if you were comfortable with the advances. So he just tried to make everything seem a little more normal.

“How about you get her a drink instead of staring?” Heeseung asked, leaning away from the dimly lit kitchen counter of the decadent party he and his friends had decided to go to that weekend. Jaeyun sighed, turning his back to you who was in another room, but in his view of the kitchen.

“Dude, that's not gonna happen” Jaeyun almost cried at the mention of hitting on you, knowing that he got nervous just by looking at you.

“Of course it will” meanwhile, Heeseung was filling two glasses with concoctions that the other didn't even pay attention to. He was in a dilemma between running out of that kitchen and not listening to Heeseung, or following his friend's advice and bringing you a drink “Now, take this and call her somewhere more private. Trust me.”

He wanted to trust, that's for sure. He wanted Heeseung to be right enough to drop those two glasses, run to you, and kiss you. Holding the plastic cups in his hand, with a little more confidence from his friend's encouraging smile, Jaeyun straightened up.

“Anything, I'll pretend nothing happened, that I was drunk and it's your fault” he said before leaving the kitchen, hearing his friend's laughter behind him before entering the busy, noisy room.

Without losing sight of you, even if his eyes weren't on you, he walked slowly towards you. You were talking to Allie, your best friend, and Sunghoon's girlfriend. Other girls were also around, but as he didn't know many people, just his best friend was enough for him to know that he was surrounded by trustworthy people.

At a moment when Allie decided to pay attention to some questions from another girl, you were speechless for a few seconds, looking around to stop your eyes automatically on Jaeyun. It was as if your body and brain were aware of his approach and where he was.

“Hey” you moved your lips, he knew what had been said just by reading your lips. And because he always looked at your mouth.

“Hey” he greeted back, coming close enough to you to offer the glass of drink. Your throat was screaming for something wet to wash away all the talk from before because when you got together with your friends, there wasn't a minute when you were quiet.

“How did you guess I needed it?” you asked an amused tone in your voice making Jaeyun smile at you.

“Thought transmission?” he suggested, shrugging and sipping his drink.

“Uh girls, I think it's about time” Allie looked between you and Jaeyun, a small smile forming on her lips. You'd say you were innocent if it weren't for the double-entendre noises coming from your other friends.

At that moment you wanted to crawl under that filthy party mat and never leave. Or you wanted to be drunk enough to pretend that your cheeks weren't burning fiercely and that you had nowhere else to look but at him.

“I'm sorry, I—” you began, your voice breaking as there was only you and Jaeyun left in that corner.

“It's okay, I suffer a bit from that with the boys too” he said.

You bit your tongue to ask why, if it was for the same reason as yours since that could mean he had feelings for you too. But instead of asking, again, you let Jaeyun grab your hand as he always did and pull you to another corner of the party. No protest came from your lips as he left with you and went to the balcony of the busy house.

No one stayed there at that moment, even though it was dark and quiet. People seemed to want the movement and loud music, or the rooms stinking of sweat and sex from who knows how many people who had passed by. You and he preferred the calm of the wooden gang with their almost empty glasses of booze.

He sat down first, stretching his arm on the back of the bench while you sat down next to him and, without thinking, snuggled closer into his body.

“Can I…”

“Of course, you can” he didn't even need your continuation to know, you could be like that with him, even more so outside where the small gusts of wind were hitting you both. Jaeyun wanted to go back and get his coat to warm you up, but that would have meant leaving you alone, and that wasn't the plan. He wanted to follow what Heeseung had said in the letter and it was already a big step to have your head resting on his shoulder at that moment.

Not that it had never happened before, the two of you had been like this before. On the sofa in the boys' apartment, when you two went to the movies with Sunghoon and Allie, or during class breaks in the library when you shared a headset. It was so good to be close to him. The glow of the night added a finishing touch to what you and he needed.

The minutes of silence became a little longer, but at no point did you and Jaeyun feel like saying anything. He just listened to the sound of your breathing and, sometimes, your fingers touching his hand, which was resting on your shoulder. It was intimate and cozy, and he wished he could do more with it. The internal dilemma about raising one hand and touching you, pulling you close, and kissing you was screaming in the back of his mind.

What if he was such a coward? What if you thought he didn't like you or didn't feel anything, even if all the sexual tension was seen by anyone outside? It made him a little dazed, maybe even nervous, he could tell.

But Jaeyun hadn't counted on the fact that you could be a bit quicker, with more attitude. Or he could have waited since you were his opposite.

Raising your head enough to look at him, you noticed that Jaeyun was already looking in your direction. The dark, curious orbs shone a little more brightly than usual. The drinking glass had long since been emptied and placed next to the foot of the bench you were both sitting on. So you had your hands free to lift and hold his face between your hands. Jaeyun sighed at the tender touch of your fingertips, almost living a little dream as your thumbs slid across his cheeks. The tickle of tiny stubble ran down his smooth, well-drawn chin.

“Jake” you whispered, as a warning that he could stop you if he wanted to. But his response was the opposite, taking his free hand to your waist to pull you closer to him. The touch of Jaeyun's fingers reached the little bit of exposed skin between the waistband of your pants and the T-shirt you were wearing that night. He pressed his fingers there to know that you could go further, that he wanted to too.

Then slowly you leaned in. Jaeyun's other hand slid from your shoulder where his arm was resting to go to the back of your neck and hold your face closer, afraid that you would regret it and abandon him. He couldn't miss it.

When your breath hitched against his ajar mouth, his lips red and kissable, you saw him moisten them with the tip of his tongue before moving in too. The softness of Jaeyun's mouth brushed against yours before the bang of the door caused you and him to break apart in shock.

“What—” you turned towards the door, your eyes widening with the slight fear that invaded your body and Jaeyun's too.

“You two…” Heeseung stammered, his Adam's apple bobbing in a dry, regretful swallow. He looked between you and Jaeyun with wide eyes, his hand going back and forth from the bench to the inside of the house “I— I got in the way?”

“No” you said slowly.

“Yes, Heeseung” Jaeyun replied, abruptly getting up from the bench and walking over to him “What happened?”

“I'm sorry, I— Shit” Heeseung looked like he was going to cry at that moment, his eyes glazing over at the two of you as he watched you slowly get up behind Jaeyun “I just wanted help because Sunghoon's drunk and I thought I should look for you, but—” he stopped looking at his friend and his eyes went towards you “I can't believe I did that, what the fuck.”

“Hey bro, calm down” Jaeyun seemed a little less nervous, trying to understand that Heeseung really was worried about Sunghoon and wouldn't do that on purpose. You understood too, even though your heart was pounding frantically. Both from the fright and the near-kiss with Jaeyun.

“You can continue, I—”

“No, let's go after Hoon” Jaeyun held Heeseung by the shoulders, giving him a little squeeze before pushing his friend back into the house. You would have breathed a sigh of relief if he had gone in with Heeseung, but instead, he turned towards you.

Jaeyun's eyes stared at your face while you looked everywhere but at him. Come on, you were the one who had leaned in minutes before, so why be embarrassed when he was approaching you? His fingers found their way to your chin and you were forced to hold the man's gaze. A small, shy smile played on the lips you should have been kissing at that moment.

“Do you mind if—” Jaeyun asked.

“No, go help him, please” you knew that the three of them were inseparable, but you were sure to end Heeseung's life when he sobered up.

Jaeyun smiled a little wider, sliding his hand around the curve of your neck and pulling your face to his chest. His lips slowly kissed your forehead and sniffed your hair as if he needed to smell you before he pulled away.

He smiled once more, this time pulling away for real so that he could enter the house and help Heeseung with the task of taking his drunk friend home. While you felt your whole body tingle, even more so in the parts where Jaeyun had touched you, like an addictive drug you hadn't even tasted yet.

Anyone could live with being interrupted just once when they were about to kiss someone they liked. But Jaeyun already felt flames coming out of his ears because it had happened more than once. He couldn't count the number of times he'd tried to be alone with you, looking for more intimate contact with you beyond that party.

First, it was in the apartment he started sharing with Heeseung and Sunghoon. Movie night could always add Allie, you, and any girl Heeseung was interested in. Jaeyun felt lucky to be sitting next to you with his fingers tangled in yours. The small moment when he stared at you, like a silent request to go to the kitchen and make more popcorn with him. Even though the bucket on Allie's lap was practically full. It was just an excuse to sneak away and be alone with you. Slowly pin you against the counter and completely forget about the popcorn that neither of us wanted. His gaze would alternate between your lips and your eyes, the sliding nibble of Jaeyun's teeth against his lower lip to make him suppress a smile, driving you crazy without even realizing it.

He would lean towards you, his breath hot against your mouth again as your heart pounded in anticipation. Only for Heeseung's girl to arrive the next second looking for a glass of water. She was oblivious to everything the two of you were having but didn't fail to apologize for the interruption, listening to Jaeyun's masked response of affection as he pointed out to her where she could get the drink.

The second was at university, late at night, where Jaeyun always ended up staying to study a bit more on Tuesday nights. Calculus was the core of his course, but even so, it was a subject he liked to dedicate himself to, even if he found it easy. He always studied alone and had the company of the famous headphones or a few snacks to pass the time until he returned to the shared apartment, but that changed as soon as you started attending at the same time as him.

Your advanced literature lessons could be a good companion to his calculus classes, while the two of you shared snacks and exchanged furtive glances, Jaeyun could smile slowly every time your hand touched his as you went to pick up the package or simply sneak forward to get the water bottle. He didn't even bother to change seats so that he could sit next to her, get a little closer, and feel the warmth of your body in those last few minutes of studying. Finishing the task with the smell of your perfume in the air was the only thing that could calm him down at that moment.

“I'm almost done” Jaeyun whispered to you, looking in your direction, although your eyes were still on your reading material. He studied your whole calm and relaxed profile, only to almost swallow a sigh when you looked in his direction.

“There's no need to rush, I'll wait for you” you smiled so sweetly that he couldn't help himself. It was now or never, he would have to kiss you because there was no one else there to interrupt. After so long he could finally feel your lips.

Giving a fuck about any personal space rules or anything like that, Jaeyun wrapped his hands around your face and pulled you close to his. He no longer wanted to waste a second without feeling your lips and that's why the rush had to be in his favor now. If it wasn't for the damn librarian and that demon encyclopedia that fell on the floor.

“Fuck” Jaeyun wanted to shout at that moment, his hands still on your face as he felt his whole body tremble.

Your shy laughter only made everything seem worse because you were just as embarrassed as he was. There was no way this could be happening.

“The universe can only hate me, it's not possible” he finally said, moving away from you to collect the materials.

Those were the few times he clearly remembered that he didn't get to kiss you, although there could have been more, but Jaeyun simply wanted to erase them from his mind because he got stressed about that kind of thing.

He knew that it affected the mood of his friends and of everyone around him. It wasn't just you who was a social butterfly, but his best friends too. Living on the university campus with a bunch of talkative people at least gave Jaeyun more to talk about. But he wasn't in the mood. His head was spinning with the thought that the stupid universe was playing tricks on him and he'd never get to kiss you. He could even settle down to know that the attraction between the two of you would be nothing more than physical touches and the light brushing of lips – which was the closest you ever got to each other.

It took his sleep away in an inexplicable way, because how could this be happening? How could someone be capable of bringing him to the brink of collapse just because they'd never managed to kiss? It was humanly impossible, wasn't it?

“Jake” Sunghoon caught his eye, throwing the bath towel over his friend's head as he watched him entertain himself on his cell phone. However, Jaeyun's thoughts were far away from the device in his hands.

“Hm?” he asked, lifting his gaze to look at his friend just out of the shower. Sunghoon was already dressed from the waist down, for which Jaeyun was grateful, so he ran from one side of the room to the other in search of his shirt.

“Are you ready? I need to call Allie and Y/n, they're meeting us at the party” he sighed defeatedly. One more moment he'd be close to you and nothing would happen because there would always be something to get in the way.

“I'm already there, just waiting for you and Hee is having a snack” he muttered.

Sunghoon knew Jaeyun's obvious frustration and how he dealt with it all. He couldn't blame him, after all, if he had been in his friend's shoes, he would have lost his mind. But it turned out that Jaeyun was calm about it, otherwise he might well have locked you in a room at the university and kissed you right there. But everyone was talking about Sim Jaeyun, the calmest, quietest boy they knew. Even if he was collapsing with desire, he would never get past that point. Even if now, in addition to the desire, he felt anger and frustration that nothing had happened.

“Then go get something to eat too, I don't want to see you looking ugly all night” he joked, knowing that Jaeyun's countenance wasn't due to hunger.

With no room for discussion or any jokes, he just headed out of Sunghoon's room and into the kitchen. His steps were slow, contemplating what would become of his and his friends' evening together, yet another university party where he knew he'd be bumping into you all night and being interrupted at every turn. It was frustrating to unravel the evening when it hadn't even happened yet.

“Peanut butter and jelly or just a slice of cheese?” Heeseung greeted Jaeyun as soon as he entered. The sandwich ingredients were spread out in front of him on the counter, making the newcomer's smile widen a little. Heeseung was funny without even trying.

“Peanut butter and jelly sounds good” he said.

“And we can hold our drink for longer” added the other, preparing a sandwich for Jaeyun while keeping his eyes on each slice “You know, man, I think you should bring Y/n to the apartment today.”

“What? What do you mean?” he couldn't take his eyes off Heeseung's movements, the swipe of the knife with jam on the bread, the mixing of the peanut butter until he closed the bread and handed it to his friend. It was all so fast, but Jaeyun focused on each movement just so he wouldn't have to deal with a pair of curious eyes staring at him.

“We can see your anger smoking from afar, Jake” he laughed a little, “Get to the party, find her, and bring her here. So you two can be alone.”

Determined to take a bite of bread and get it over with, he didn't want Heeseung to be so sure of his thoughts. But it turned out that Jaeyun had also been avoiding you for a few weeks because he knew he'd get frustrated every time he got close to you and it came to nothing.

“I'd better let it go” he chewed a little, wiping the corner of his lips with his fingertips when a bit of jam almost got on his cheek “I don't think that's going to happen. I have to accept that and that the universe must hate me so much.”

“Come on, bro, stop being an idiot” Heeseung wanted to throw a slice of bread at him, but he knew he'd be scolded by Sunghoon as soon as he saw it. So he settled for taking a deep breath and biting into the bread he had made for him a while before Jaeyun arrived “You and her just need a space where there won't be anyone, and our apartment will be empty.

“But someone will come” he finished his snack in a few bites, surprising himself with how much he needed it. Searching for a paper napkin, he finished cleaning up the small mess before looking at Heeseung “Some neighbor is going to knock, the cell phone of one of us is going to ring… Anything” he huffed, irritated “It feels like I'm living in the worst romantic comedy of my life.”

“That's why you have the two best friends in the world to help you with this” Sunghoon appeared, stealing the piece of bread Heeseung was about to eat. Avoiding any protests as he made his way to the other side of the kitchen counter.

“And how, exactly, would you two do that?” Jaeyun asked “Heeseung has already gotten in my way once.”

“And I blame myself every day for it, I really do.”

“He almost cries just remembering it” Sunghoon laughed out loud, being joined by Jaeyun in that little implication with the older man “But Hee's right, you two need to come here. It's making even me and him angry.”

Seeing his best friends share that feeling would have been comical, if it hadn't been so tragic for him. Everyone knows the internal drama Jaeyun was going through just for not kissing someone he wanted to. He didn't want to get his hopes up because he knew how the universe wrote things for him and you, so he just shrugged and nodded in agreement.

“Great, then let's go” Sunghoon grabbed Jaeyun by the shoulders, pushing him out of the kitchen.

“Just don't use the armchair in the living room, please. I love snoozing in it” Heeseung whined one last time before turning off the lights in the apartment, bidding a small farewell to the sacred place Jaeyun could take you at the end of the party.

The familiar scene made Jaeyun's body tremble in anticipation. Parties weren't a big deal, but at least he could have some fun and talk to some people before he had to take you out of there. It was his only goal after Sunghoon and Heeseung had convinced him to take you out of that party. He just didn't know how to approach you, since he had been avoiding you for a while.

There would be no need to avoid you if he thought that exchanging a few words was enough since the last time you two were interrupted. But there was no way to think straight and he knew his feelings were confusing, fighting them wasn't working, so the only thought was to keep quiet.

Jaeyun didn't know what it was like to touch your hand or feel you so close for a few weeks. He skipped a few study sessions and even pretended to be tired the times you went to his and the boys' apartment with Allie. A goodnight wave was the only thing you received, not counting the unread messages and some with apologies: I'm busy today, can we talk later? He was a complete jerk, for sure. Now, besides fate denying all of this, you could have lost interest in him just because Jaeyun couldn't deal with his own feelings.

He tried not to focus on that, after all, the party was going on and he just needed to find you. He only needed a few seconds to talk to you and get you out of there, so that was the mission as soon as Sunghoon received the call from Allie, that the two of you had arrived at the party.

It's now or never. He thought. His hands were in his jeans pocket trying to camouflage his nervousness while he had Heeseung and Sunghoon by his side, waiting for the two of you to arrive, which didn't take long. Just like every party, Allie quickly found Sunghoon, consequently finding his friends too.

Jaeyun's eyes quickly found yours, without even needing to know where you were looking because, to his surprise or not, you were already looking at him. Your smile wavered a little, not knowing if he would ignore you again or treat you coldly like he had been doing for the past few weeks, and Jaeyun felt that as you approached Allie. Your eyes wavered, although they didn't leave his for a minute until you were finally close.

“Hey, we found you all” Allie smiled, hugging each one until stopping at Sunghoon, where she remained in her boyfriend's arms.

“We were waiting for you two” Heeseung sang, hugging you and then standing next to the newly embraced couple “How about we get a drink?”

“I think that's a great idea” Sunghoon sang, pulling Allie with him and hearing Heeseung's footsteps right behind.

Your eyebrows narrowed, your gaze confused because neither of the other two spoke much to you and only led Allie away. Not even she had talked that much to Jaeyun in the short seconds that the two of you had appeared. Your gaze followed where the three had disappeared and that made you even more curious, they didn't even bother to call the two of you.

Was this something between them or were your friends wanting to give you and Jaeyun some privacy? You didn't know and it made you apprehensive because after some time you were alone with him with no one around – besides the strangers from the party – so looking in his direction again was different this time.

“Do you—” your voice broke a little, nervous for the first time in Jaeyun's presence “Do you want to accompany them? They're going to drink and we—”

“No” he interrupted you quickly, praying to the heavens that he hadn't sounded rude in his tone or he wouldn't know what to do next. You just raised your eyebrows, surprised by the way he spoke to you. Jaeyun's tone had been nothing compared to his actions as he walked the few steps that separated the two of you, extending his hand to you. The small touch in your hands finally returns little by little. He slid his fingers between yours as calmly as he had ever done since the first time. You smiled involuntarily at that, your heart skipping a beat when Jaeyun's eyes landed on yours. “Let's get out of here.”

“What?” you asked. “Jake, we—”

“Please? Come with me.”

You knew a little about Jaeyun’s vulnerability. The sweet protests he made when there was an argument between his friends, or when he pouted because he couldn’t understand something about college. Even the way he messed up his hair when he was nervous was adorable. But you never thought that seeing him say please with those eyes would make you give in to anything for him.

Your nod was all he needed to grab your hand even tighter and walk to the kitchen door quickly. His friends were still busy preparing drinks without realizing that Jaeyun was standing there.

“Hey, idiots” he shouted enough to get Heeseung and Sunghoon’s attention. Allie smiled when she saw you behind him. “Don’t knock on my room door, or I swear to God I’ll kill you the second that happens.”

It was a short warning, but understanding enough to know that he had finally gathered the courage. Heeseung held back a scream when he saw you holding hands with Jaeyun, waving your free hand without really knowing what was happening, but praying that whatever he had thought of, could happen.

“What does Jake mean by that?” Allie asked as soon as you and him were out of sight, now looking at her boyfriend.

“We left the apartment for him and Y/n tonight” he said. “This kiss needs to happen.”

She laughed at the idea, not being able to believe that this was happening. This almost task force just to make a kiss happen. But she was happy that it would finally be fixed, because neither the boys nor her, could stand to see you and Jaeyun almost falling over because of this.

Arriving at the shared apartment had never been so torturous for him, even more so with you by his side and in silence the entire way back. Jaeyun knew you had countless questions about what was happening, perhaps focused on an explanation as to why he hadn't spoken to you so much in the last few weeks. But the truth behind taking you to his and his friends' apartment was now even more explainable. He wanted to look into your eyes, without interruptions, and be able to tell you that he couldn't stand another second without having to kiss you.

The same silence that stretched in the car was followed by the walk to the lobby of the building, the elevator, and, finally, the apartment where Jaeyun unlocked the door and let you enter first. Quiet and silent, dark and with the wind blowing against the window. That was how the environment was if none of the three boys were inside.

Turning to you after he locked the door, Jaeyun sighed slowly.

“Can we go to my room?” it was almost begged at his request, his voice wanting to scream, but it was as restrained as the desire he had to grab you right there. You just agreed, without protesting at all to his requests since you found him at the party. Although your mind made a few more notes to ask him later what was going on.

You followed Jaeyun with careful steps down the hallway, feeling the scent of masculine lotions mixing in the environment. There was a bit of Heeseung, Sunghoon, and Jaeyun everywhere. At least it was clean and smelled good, unconventional for any apartment where only boys lived. His friends were careful, at least that made you feel relieved.

When the two of you reached the door to his room, it was your turn to sigh, thinking about what awaited you while you were there with the boy. Even though it was his room, Jaeyun didn't let go of his gentlemanly manners and made way for you, his back against the frame and his hand on the doorknob to give you a better view of the room. It was cozy and so… Sim Jaeyun. You couldn’t explain it, but everything in that room was definitely him. From the frames and photos to the trophies and the bookshelf with things on display. Some medals and full bottles of liquor. One of the boys could have given him a gift and he didn’t even open it. You smiled at that, imagining that in the short time you had known him, Jaeyun was the one who drank the least among the boys.

“Sorry if this is all sudden, but—” his voice radiated to your ears, alerting you to the current situation you two found yourselves in. You turned to him, noticing how shy Jaeyun seemed inside his room. The click of the key locking the door didn’t scare you, especially because it wouldn’t be a threat to be locked in there with him regardless of how long the two of you spent. It could be a precaution while the two of you were alone “I needed this time with you.”

Slowly, Jaeyun approached where you were in the middle of his room. Your hands didn't have a clear path, a little nervous about what to do with them, so you left them at your sides and just watched him walk towards you. His head lowered and his eyes wandered all over the floor until he finally looked up at you.

“We're here now, aren't we?” you asked softly, the sound of your voice echoing through every fiber of Jaeyun's body and making him feel electric.

“We are” he said in the same tone, moving a little closer until there was finally no more space between you and him “Y/n…” Jaeyun tilted his head enough so that his height was no different from yours. The same slow ritual that was done before anything got in the way of the two of you. One of his hands slowly reached your face, pushing away any strand of hair that had been left there as you took the steps until you reached his room. His other hand went to your waist, holding you in front of him so that you had no chance of escaping.

You didn't want to be left behind, you needed to touch him too, so your hands slowly moved up Jaeyun's chest until they grabbed the collar of the shirt he was wearing. Your fingers played with the fabric before one of them entered the shirt and held him by the shoulders. That touch made him shiver all over.

Jaeyun tilted his head to one side and you, like a rehearsed dance, tilted it to the other. There was no need for any conversation between the two of you to know what you both intended to do at that moment. Your lips curved into a small smile when your eyes met his, so close and bright to yours. Those eyes that were seen in every way were now staring at you with so much repressed desire that you wondered if you two might have been feeling the same thing.

His hand slid from your face to your jaw, slowly tracing the line until it went down to your neck and anchored between it and your shoulder. The perfect place. As if Jaeyun's hand was literally made to be there. He held you subtly until he brought your face closer, his mouth finally brushing against yours. You weren't ashamed of the groan you let out when his lips finally brushed against yours, feeling the softness that was his mouth for more seconds than you had ever felt before.

But nothing would be so easy for the two of you if it weren't for another interruption. Not so direct this time, but the honking of some son of a bitch on the street startled you and Jaeyun at that moment, almost making him hesitate and let go of you.

“Fuck off” he cursed without caring, not caring that his heart was still in a frenzy from the small scare and interruption. He wouldn't let anything else ruin that moment.

Without thinking about anything else, Jaeyun finally joined his lips with yours in a slow kiss, even though his desire was overwhelming. Pressing his mouth to yours and feeling the heat of your lips, he could melt at that very moment. Your mouth was as delicious as he thought it would be, and as you slowly opened it to let his tongue pass, Jaeyun wasn't ashamed of the pleasurable sound he made at the touch of your warm, wet muscle against his.

The kiss was slow, although loaded with an underlying desire that the two of you had been keeping for so long. Jaeyun's hand remained on your neck as your tongues played in sync, your mouths sliding against each other as if they were made to fit together in that kiss. Your hands slowly ran to his hair, pulling the small strands on the back of his neck as he slid his teeth along your lower lip, just in time to suck on the tip of your tongue before kissing you again with even more intensity.

A shiver ran through your body as his hands began to grope your sides, bringing you even closer and pressing your body against his. You could feel every muscle in Jaeyun's body tense at your touch, but relax as you and he intensified that kiss. You had both waited for so long that now you could die in each other's mouths if it were possible.

“Y/n” he moaned your name, sliding his mouth along your jaw and spreading a bit of shared drool across your skin. You didn't mind the sloppiness, it was turning you on much more than you could admit. Jaeyun found a space between your neck to scrape his teeth and suck a good amount of your skin in a slow hickey.

“Jake” you moaned back, your hands running over his shoulders and down his body until stopping at his hips. It was all involuntary, but you were unable to stop yourself and grabbed him by the waist to press his hips against yours.

“Holy shit” Jaeyun gave an even more passionate hickey on your neck, running the tip of his tongue to soothe your skin when you moaned in response. He wanted to apologize for the carelessness, but he didn’t know how to react to that “You’re going to drive me crazy doing this, for God’s sake” panting, he lifted his face to align with yours. His slightly sweaty forehead was now against yours, his breathing practically irregular as he opened his eyes to look at you.

Unreal. That was what Jaeyun was like after a full session of making out with you. His lips had become even more annoyingly beautiful when they were red and drooling with your drool. His eyes were dazed and downcast from your touches. His entire state in front of you was because of you. It made your panties feel wet.

“Sorry, I—” you sighed, your hands still on Jaeyun’s hips as you tried not to focus on his kissable mouth in front of you “You brought me here and, well… We…”

“I needed to kiss you” he blurted out. His mouth went down to yours again to slowly kiss you again. Jaeyun traced your entire lower lip with the tip of his tongue before feeling you sucking on the tip of his tongue like he had done to you before. That was going to kill him, for sure “I had to bring you here to do this because I couldn’t stand anyone interrupting us anymore. It got on my nerves and—”

Your laugh escaped softly. You looked at him and now reality hit you. It had all been part of a scheme he created so he could finally kiss you. Sim Jaeyun had made all that effort just for a kiss from you… It couldn’t be more perfect.

You leaned into him, your arms wrapping around Jaeyun's neck as you pulled him down and brought his mouth close to yours.

“Now we have plenty of time to do more than just kiss, Jake” you brushed the tip of your nose against him, feeling Jaeyun's breath hitch “What do you think?”

“Would you… Would you let me—” your nod was the confirmation he needed for this to happen. Not that he was intending to, especially since Jaeyun didn't even know if he would be able to kiss you. Let alone have you in his bed that same night. It was a bonus he wouldn't miss for anything in the world.

His heart was beating hard inside his chest, the sight of you slowly moving away from him as you walked backward to the bed was the most perfect sight he had ever seen. There was no way anything could disrupt that moment and he swore that if any noise made, or something happened, he wouldn't stop. There was no way. Nothing could take his focus away as your hands went to the hem of your shirt, slowly pulling it off and showing him the bra you were wearing. Jaeyun was left breathless by all of that. If you were perfectly covered up, without your clothes on he was thinking he might go crazy.

As your hands tangled in the waistband of your pants, he couldn't stay behind and started to undress himself too. Without taking his eyes off you, the eye contact was very vivid as each piece of clothing was discarded on the floor of his room. Neither of you wanted to waste a single second without looking at each other until you were completely naked.

Jaeyun approached, holding you by the waist and gently placing you on his bed. The mattress hugged you like a comfort while his body fit perfectly between your legs. His eyes traveled over every curve of your body, every little detail to record in his memory until he finally looked at your face. So close, so delicate, and at the same time breathtaking. It was then that he kissed you again. This time with a little more intensity than before.

He settled between your legs, one hand holding your hip while the other went to hold your chin, steadying your face as the kiss became hungrier. Tongues fought for dominance and a small trickle of drool ran down the corner of your mouth, but neither of you cared about that. Both you and he wanted to make up for lost time forget any disagreements with the outside world and focus only on each other.

Jaeyun's mouth separated from yours, thirsty to taste you in every corner. He wanted to know what you tasted like beyond the kiss he had been waiting for. Still holding onto your waist, he held your body in place as he trailed his lips down your chin, trailing a teasing path of drool and hot breath against your skin. Down to your collarbone, where his tongue made a longer path up to the top of your breasts.

You moaned his name so beautifully that Jaeyun never thought his cock could vibrate so much because of a sound. It was pathetic for him to admit, but he would say if anyone asked, that you had been the only person on the face of the Earth to get that from him.

“You are simply unreal to me” he whispered against your skin, licking up your chest and down to your nipple. He circled the tip of his tongue and sucked on the sensitive bud.

“Fuck, Jake” you grabbed his hair, almost crushing the boy’s face into your chest. His mouth made a warm place against your nipple as he sucked slowly and deliciously. The sucking made you even wetter.

He smiled against your breast as he gave the other one his due attention, bringing his hand to the one that was already containing his drool to squeeze the soft flesh between his fingers. There was no way you could go any further for that man between your legs. You wanted to pull out every strand of Jaeyun's hair for the little provocation, even more so every time you moaned his name softly and he made sure to suck on your nipple a little more.

Jaeyun's mouth went down between your breasts this time, running his drool over your skin up to above your belly button. He circled the tip of his tongue there, looking up to meet your closed eyes and delighting in the sensation.

“Eyes on me, Y/n” he asked softly, his mouth blowing hotly above your pussy when he finally aligned his head down there. You didn't know if you were able to see him in that state, but if he was unreal kissing you, what was sucking you? There was no way to know that if you didn't look. So you just obeyed him, opening your eyes and finding him looking at you “I promise I’ll be quick, I just need to taste you.”

You don’t even know why you nodded at his request and much less why he wanted to taste you, but you wouldn’t be crazy enough to stop him. Not when the tip of his tongue touched your clit so slowly. As hot as when he touched your nipple.

“Shit— Jake, what…” you moaned once more, a little more prolonged when he stretched out his tongue and licked a large stripe on your pussy. Collecting your essence with the tip of his tongue.

Jaeyun licked your pussy as if he was kissing you in the mouth. Each pass of his tongue through your inner lips and each circle on your clit was another reason to make you moan even louder, intertwining your fingers in the dark strands of his hair and controlling yourself with the urge to push your pussy against his face. It was surreal the way Jaeyun was eating you. The alternating between fast and slow licks, circling your needy hole that was clenching around almost nothing, was too much for you to handle.

And he felt it. Jaeyun felt every contraction of your entrance as he passed the tip of his tongue, circling the area and feeling your taste even more. It was addictive. Like everything about you was. He held his hands on your hips as you fixed your fingers in his hair, slowly letting you ride his tongue as he left the muscle erect for you to delight yourself as you pleased. He wanted you to feel pleasure on his tongue at that moment, although Jaeyun was already feeling his cock ache, pressing it against the mattress of the bed.

“Jake” your voice brought him back to reality as you rubbed your pussy on his tongue, Jaeyun taking the break between keeping it still and, sometimes, sucking on your clit when he felt your pussy descend completely into his mouth “I’m going to cum—”

“No” he stopped quickly, lifting his head from your pussy to look at you.

Jaeyun’s chin was covered with all your juices in addition to the amount of saliva he deposited while sucking you. Your eyes didn’t leave his face for a second as he lifted his body so that his face was close to yours again.

“I said I just wanted to taste you a little, you’re not supposed to cum right now” he sighed, his breathing still fast from being so fixated on your pussy that he almost forgot to breathe. You smiled tiredly at him, even though you weren’t even halfway through what the two of you were going to do.

“Why not?” you pouted, feeling Jaeyun settle between your legs and your hands quickly ran up to his face. Your thumbs ran over his chin, wiping away any traces of you or his mouth, even though your scent was still there. He leaned in a little more, capturing your lips in a slow kiss. The slow sharing tried to calm the nerves between the two of you for what was about to happen.

Neither you nor Jaeyun were nervous about this, just apprehensive about the fact that it would be your first time with each other. The kiss had been magnificent. Everything had been perfect so far, and he wanted this to end up being perfect too. So, slowly, he brought one of his hands to his cock and held it firmly. He ran the head of his cock all over your wet and drooling pussy, wanting to collect as much essence as he could so that his entrance inside you wouldn't be painful.

After a while he finally managed to do that, the head of his cock circled your hole and, carefully, Jaeyun inserted himself inside you little by little. The slow burn of his cock makes your hole mix in pain and pleasure. He filled you with every inch since he entered and you don't remember anything having filled you as well as the few seconds of Jaeyun's cock inside you.

“Because I want you to cum on my cock” he lowered his face into the crook of your neck, pressing his lips close to your ear and with a shit-eating grin on his face even though you weren't seeing it.

Jaeyun's hands went to your hips, using them as leverage to start thrusting into you. Starting the slow and sensual movements, moving his hips to a point where he could go all the way deep inside you and slowly pull it out. The coming and going of each veiny inch of his cock inside your walls only gave more fuel to your moans with his name and your hands desperate to touch something. The target this time was Jaeyun's bare back where his nails dug in as he began to pick up the pace.

“You feel so good— Fuck” he groaned as he thrust hard for the first time. Your groan almost made him back out and apologize because he was so lost in the pleasure that he didn’t even ask if he was hurting you. But as soon as he heard your groan and felt your nails burn on his back, Jaeyun knew he was doing the right job.

“Jake!” your hands ran up to the back of his neck, sliding to Jaeyun’s face and holding him facing you. It got even more intimate as he thrust a little harder into your pussy. “Don’t… Don’t stop, please.”

“I don’t plan on doing this, baby” he was panting, his cheeks flushed and his lips even redder. God, you couldn’t cum just from that sight, you had to pull yourself together with this.

Jaeyun felt the encouragement in your eyes and your words as he watched your mouth part and the hold of your gaze each time he went deeper into you. His balls slapping against your pussy made the wet noise between your legs even more erotic as it accompanied your moans and his. The slaps on your skin were getting faster and louder as Jaeyun's hips gained strength to go deeper inside you.

He was stretching you too much, your pussy getting wetter and wetter as he went deeper. The head of his cock nudging your spongy spots so well and rubbing against your tight, sensitive walls.

You pulled Jaeyun's face close to yours, your mouths inches apart sharing each other's breaths and swallowing the moans you both spilled without caring about each other's names.

“You're going to cum with me, aren't you?” he whispered against your mouth, outlining your lower lip with the tip of his tongue. You only moaned in response and Jaeyun thrust deeper, earning a scream from you when his cock hit your cervix. His hand slowly grabbed your throat and he lifted your face, although you two still had your mouths close to each other.

“I want to cum all over your cock, Jake” you replied, your hand circling his fist that still had his hand on your throat. Jaeyun didn’t apply any pressure to the spot, but having you at his mercy like that was already creating countless scenarios for next time.

Unconsciously his thumb slid over your lower lip, seeing how red your mouth was from the whole session you two shared. In an act of lust and excitement, you circled the tip of your tongue on his finger, putting it inside your mouth.

“Holy shit—” he moaned.

“Faster, Jakey” your pleading eyes and your voice muffled by his thumb were too much for Jaeyun to handle. And Jakey? That had never been said to him, and even more so in such a sensual way and with such a delicious moan that it made his hair stand on end.

He felt something rush into his blood at the combination of your lips sucking on his thumb and your pussy sucking on his cock in equally delicious and wet ways. Jaeyun was feeling on cloud nine having you like this. His hips rocked even harder, using his free hand to support the side of your hips and gain even more momentum to slam mercilessly into your pussy. The slaps on your skin burned his pelvis each time he met your drooling pussy hard. His cock being swallowed deliciously by every wall of yours.

“Oh, fuck” your lips slipped from his thumb as Jaeyun hit you deep again, his pussy-covered cock filling you in every corner. He decided to abandon his hand from your mouth to replace it with his own, feeling your hips stutter as his cock pulsed violently inside you.

“Can I—” he whispered, lips hovering over yours in ragged breaths as the sweat and sheen of Jaeyun’s skin reflected in his eyes. “Can I cum inside you?” he asked so gently, unlike the relentless movements of his hips slamming against yours.

“Please” your moaned plea was enough for him, there was no way to push Jaeyun’s buttons any further like that.

So he focused on kissing you again, sharing the movement of your tongues frantically as he drank in all your moans as his hips gained strength against yours again. Jaeyun’s heavy balls slapped against your clit with each thrust, the hot sound of wetness between the two of you and that was when he lifted your body a little as he pulled your hips that aligned the perfect angle. You felt your entire body tremble as the knot in your stomach broke and you came. So hard and intense, squeezing the walls of your pussy and almost making Jaeyun stop thrusting into you.

But he wouldn't give up, and as you came and squeezed him, it was too much to take. He moaned your name loudly followed by the curses he could remember as he emptied his load of cum inside you. Feeling your walls milk his cock as the jets of cum bathed your walls in a thick, hot white.

Jaeyun could still feel your walls convulsing around his still throbbing cock and spilling the last drops. The two of you stayed still in that position for some time. Countless minutes if you were to notice, but the feeling of still being like that was surreal.

“I think…” he breathed deeply, his mouth still close to yours breathing the same air as you. Rough and warm, irregular and comforting “We need to clean up.”

He didn't want to hear your protests, although he wanted to stay there and he knew that if he pulled out quickly, it would make both you and him sensitive. Then, carefully, Jaeyun pulled his cock out of your pussy with a hiss, earning a moan from you at how empty you felt. The sight of your hole leaking from how much he came could make him jump you for a second round, that wouldn't be a bad idea. But he had to be rational and try one thing at a time. At least for now.

So quickly, running to the bathroom, he grabbed a towel and wet it before wringing it out and only dampening the cloth. Running back to the bed to clean up the remains of his and your sex as carefully as he could. Wearing the towel in the laundry basket before getting back into bed with you.

“Hey, Y/n” Jaeyun whispered your name as he lay down next to you, pulling your body close to his and snuggling you against his bare chest. You grunted softly, feeling the tiredness take over every fiber of your body, but gathering some energy to lift your face and rest your chin on his chest.

“Yes, Jakey?” you smiled slowly, the redness on your face still evident and Jaeyun felt his heart pound even more at that. You looked beautiful in every way.

“Thank you for that, it was so…” he sighed “Amazing, seriously. Thank you.”

“You were amazing at everything, you know that?” you lowered your face to kiss his chest, moving his aching body up just enough for your mouth to be close, kissing him slowly there “I thank you.”

“Let’s thank the universe for conspiring in favor of this, then” he smiled against your mouth.

“Finally. Thank you, universe” you smiled too, kissing him back before feeling Jaeyun’s arms around your waist to make you lie down next to him. Snuggling you a little closer and enjoying the moment that the two of you should have had a long time ago.

Because both of you would enjoy the truce that the universe gave you two, after all, you and Jaeyun deserved it. Nothing else conspiring against what you and he should have had from the start.

#enhypen #enhypen smut #jake smut #jaeyun smut #enhypen jake #enha smut #jake fluff #jaeyun fluff #jake x reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen hard hours #jake hard hours #jaeyun hard hours #enha fics #enha fluff #enhypen masterlist #enhypen imagines #bay writes.

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sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth · 4 months ago

Text

I don't know why I bite

(Dean Winchester x female reader)

Summary You and Dean can’t stop fighting, so Sam locks you in a room together, literally, to hash it out. CWs Violence. Rough sex. Everyone's pretty dysfunctional. General hurt. Biting. Dean + dog metaphors because it just makes sense. 18+. 6.9k words. AN I don't really know how I feel about posting long fics like this here - it seems a little awkward to read, but I'm gonna let y'all decide whether you like this format.

Dean Winchester masterlist ⏐ SPN masterlist

My friends think I like to fight, but it's just not true. Sometimes I lose my temper and blow off a little steam, but I've never enjoyed it.

I'm not a violent dog.

I don't know why I bite.

- Isle of Dogs

Dean Winchester is driving you crazy.

From the first moment you mouth off to him when you first meet you know you found a good sparring partner.

He’s quick, you’re quicker. You’re clever, he’s more clever. He grins at your teasing and you laugh at some of the jabs he gets in.

It works, because you’re both intensely aware of your own roles, your own pitfalls – you can’t hurt him by making fun of something that’s part of the character he’s created, because it’s not really him you’re making fun of. It’s the same the other way around.

You make fun of how much sex he has with strangers, because it’s part of his bad boy glamour, just another coping mechanism.

He makes fun of your excessive violence towards the less humanoid monsters you fight, because he knows you don’t actually enjoy it, that you do it to look tough in this boy’s club that is hunting, that your hands shake when you wash them later.

You make fun of his love for his car, but never of the fact that it’s one of the few kindnesses his father’s ever given him, because the first is fair game but the second would be like pushing a knife between his ribs.

He makes fun of how jumpy and irritable you are sometimes, but never of how often you wake up screaming, because one has been weaved as a silly trait into your personality and the other he knows too well himself.

How well you have to know each other, how intimate the understanding of that line you don’t cross is, is something neither of you is willing to look at. It’s like surgery, sometimes, how close you have to cut to the line, to give the other one that thrill of being known, of being seen, but never of being known too well, of being watched. That would go too far.

If Dean or you were able to take that, you wouldn’t need those intrinsic personas to shield you from everything that could be painful.

You’ve known each other for about a year when it takes a turn. It doesn’t happen on purpose and, looking back, it’s no one’s fault.

You’re attracted to Dean because, well, you have two eyes and a sex drive. You know he is attracted to you because he checks you out, which, well, Dean would probably check out a wall if it had a nice pair, but he does it with a look in his eyes that’s different, that’s not the mask he uses to bang waitresses and co-eds and unhappy wives, all non-descript shadow people passing through his life.

Potentially something could have come of it. Maybe, if one of you would have been lonely enough or horny enough, you could have let your personas, your life-long starring roles, play with each other. It probably would have been hot, but performative, both of you too busy to prove how much you don’t need to be there.

It doesn’t happen that way, though, because this happens:

Dean and you are hurt, which isn’t unusual. You can’t open your right eye so well and you hear a whistle every time you exhale. Dean’s got blood running down his face from a cut somewhere in his hair and the thing you were hunting speared him with a pen, a pen, because that’s what was in reach when Dean was standing over it, getting ready to beat its head in. It wanted to live, and you can’t think about that too much because if you do you think you’ll be sick.

Essentially, you both look like you’re on death’s door, so you don’t go back to Sam, because you know it will terrify him. Instead, you stop at a gas station, get everything you need to imitate a visit to the emergency room. The guy working at the gas station looks at you two and you must look like Natural Born Killers but neither of you cares. You get a bottle of shitty whiskey as well.

Then you hunker down, in the cheapest pay-by-the-hour motel you’ve ever seen. There’s red neon everywhere and you don’t even want to know what the room would look like under a black light.

“You first,” you say to Dean, and he complains, but you push him down on the chair you’ve moved to the middle of the room. “Stabbed beats carved-in lung,” you say, and Dean scoffs, which makes him cough.

“Anything to get to put your hands on me, huh?” he jokes when he’s recovered. You sort of chuckle, trying to find the cut on his head first. “Been a long time, has it?” he asks, flinching when you find it.

“Winchester,” you say, laying a cotton bud soaked in alcohol against the cut, making Dean buck under you, a deep groan leaving him. “You could be the last man on earth and I’d still prefer celibacy.” Dean chuckles.

“Don’t know what you’re missing out on,” he says. The cut’s mostly stopped bleeding, so you decide to leave it for now.

“Yeah, a bunch of STDs,” you mumble as you kneel down, suppressing a whine at something hurting, you don’t even know what.

The stab wound is next. Dean, in his infinite wisdom, pulled out the pen. It’s a natural instinct, to want something that is hurting you out of your body, but he still should know better.

You push up his shirt, look at the wound, ignore all that skin around it.

Cotton bud. Alcohol.

Dean hisses. “Whiskey?” he says, and you stop what you’re doing for a second to grab the bottle off the table near you, pass it to him. He opens it, takes a deep gulp, while you watch his throat work, swallowing. He drops his head, the bottle leaving his mouth, some of it running down his chin. It shouldn’t make you feel what it makes you feel. He’s a mess, and so are you, but getting to watch him like this is a privilege you know not many are afforded.

Stripped down, broken, fresh off a kill. It’s him at his best, in a way.

He passes the bottle to you, and you don’t wipe the rim. You set it down when you’re done.

“This is gonna need stitches,” you say, motioning to the wound. He nods. “What are you waiting for then?”

He barely makes any sounds while you do it, while you sew him back together. It’s over soon, since you’re quick and practiced and it’s not a huge wound. He sighs when he’s done.

“Good?” you ask.

“Magnificent,” he says, panting a little. You give him a second to recover, then push his arm for him to move. He gets up, and you take his place.

You’re not sure how much he can do for you but you’re not going to skip the chance to have him touch you, to have him try to fix you. He looks at your eye first, cleans it but it’s just a shiner, there’s not much to do. While he does it, his thumb rests on your cheek. You’re intensely aware of it, but you just look ahead.

“Saw you miss that one shot,” he says, when he’s done, and his hands leave your face. “The first one? At the big guy?” He shakes his head as he takes the whiskey and drinks again. “I’ve seen some bad shooting from you, but that was sad. Such a big target, too.”

You chuckle, but something pulls in you. No, you think, but you don’t know why. This should be save terrain.

You flinch when Dean lays his hand on your chest, above your breasts but the inside of his wrist is brushing against you. You think for a second that you can feel his heartbeat through it but then you’re not sure.

“Breathe in”, he says, and you do, while he concentrates on where the wheezing sound you make is coming from. “Throat?” he asks, then frowns. “You got choked? When?”

No, you think again, and this time you know why. You swallow, and it hurts.

“While you were hiding out downstairs,” you say, but your voice is missing the apathy required to deliver the jab, so it falls extra flat. Dean picks it up, though, but he misunderstands.

“Oh, you mean when the big guy decided to chase you after you didn’t shoot him?” He chuckles, his hand not leaving you, but then he stops, thinking. “No, no, he was already dead.”

You need him to stop. You need him to stop trying to figure this out. He’s doing it so he can make fun of you. If he knows which of the freaks hurt you, he can pick out specifically why that one getting to you is embarrassing. It’s fine, normally, but you don’t want him to know.

“Let’s see,” he says, his hand slipping off you. “There was the big guy, the squirrely asshole that stabbed me, and those two in the basement,” he counts off while he reaches for the whiskey again. He shakes his head, concentrating. “Who was upstairs?” he wonders.

He can never shut up. It’s like he was born without the skill, without the knowledge of how to ever just shut the fuck up.

He lowers the bottle, then holds it out for you but you don’t grab it. “Be honest,” he says. “Did you just run into a door at a funny angle and now you’re pretending there was a fifth?” He shakes the bottle a little, because he thinks you didn’t notice it.

You can’t reach for it. You don’t feel your hands.

“It was a child,” you say.

It wasn’t a child, of course, at least not a human one, for whatever that’s worth. It was something that was wearing a child, the kid itself burned out long ago. But it looked like one. It sounded like one. Not when it launched itself at you across the room or when it gave that godawful screech. But later, when it was lying there. That’s when.

You swallow again, and your throat hurts. Little chubby hands did that, the ones with the dimples. You feel a tear roll down your cheek. No no no. This isn’t supposed to happen.

You wipe at it, immediately, but you know Dean’s seen it. Seen you.

He lowers the bottle, slowly, like the strength is going out of his arm. He says your name, and you say: “Don’t.”

He says it again and before you know it you are standing up so quickly that the chair goes flying.

“I said fucking don’t!” you snap at him, because you just need him to stop. You need him to stop sounding like that and you need him to stop looking at you like that, his eyes all soft and his mouth in a straight line. This is worse than anything.

No, you need to get out. Your chest is constricting and you just need to not be here.

You stride towards the door and Dean is stupid enough to come after you, and he’s grabbing you, his hand like a vice around your upper arm. You turn so suddenly that he has to let go, the turning making pain flash through you, and you think good.

“Don’t ever touch me,” you grunt and Dean takes a step back. Then you’re out the door, no idea where you’re going.

You don’t come back for three days.

You left your phone at the motel with Dean so there’s no way for him to contact you. You barely remember the days. You have your wallet on you, so there’s that.

You drink, you know that. You drink and you don’t stop drinking because it’s the only way you can sleep.

You pick someone up, at some point, hoping you can be fucked senseless but it’s disappointing, doesn’t get you anywhere, so you leave. You don’t dare touch yourself, your body and what it can do horrifying and disgusting to you.

It doesn’t feel like three days, but apparently that’s what it is.

When you return to the motel, the one you were originally staying at, not the one you and Dean went to, you expect the brothers to be gone.

You get a room, get cleaned up, sitting in the bath water while it goes from boiling hot to lukewarm. You walked past a second hand shop earlier, picked out some clothes, just jeans and a shirt, carrying them with you in a plastic bag. You also bought some other essentials, and you clean yourself as much as you can, make yourself as presentable as possible.

Not to look good. Just to look not broken. Just so you can pretend nothing happened.

Then you go to the room you shared with Sam and Dean. You knock. They’re probably long gone, but then you hear foot steps behind the door, familiar murmuring and the door opens and Sam’s there, all puppy dog eyes and awkward posture.

He looks immensely relieved when he sees you, and you think for a second that he’s about to pull you in for a hug but something on your face stops him.

“Jesus”, he says, as the door swings open to reveal Dean, farther back in the room, his phone in his hands. “We called every hospital around, we thought you were—”

“I’m fine,” you say, tearing your eyes from Dean. “Your brother didn’t tell you I was going out?”

“Going out?” Sam says, unbelieving and a little bit angry as you push your way past him into the room. “You were gone for three days!”

You ignore him, look at Dean, your eyes daring him. He’s looking at you like he’s expecting your head to explode, but then he says: “She said she was going out, Sammy, leave it alone.” Sam looks bewildered as you turn to him.

“But you said—” Sam starts, but Dean must throw him a look that shuts him up. You don’t turn back in time to see it.

That is how the balance is thrown off. Once it is gone, you cannot reestablish it, no matter how hard you try.

The jokes you make at Dean’s expanse are all missed shots. They don’t cross that invisible line, but they’re… they’re mean. They’re nasty. They’re no fun. They come out of you that way and it makes you cringe at yourself, but you can’t stop.

Dean, on the other hand, overcompensates the other way. His jokes are soft, way too soft, and every single one of them makes your blood almost boil over. Reminds you that he thinks you’re something that needs to be spared, needs to be put in bubble wrap.

That you’re something he can look at the way he looked at you that night.

You two become unbearable to be around, so you don’t really blame Sam for putting his foot down.

It’s another no-name town in another no-name county and you know, and Dean knows and Sam knows that the evening will drag on the way every other evening has dragged on in the last weeks – with tension in the air so thick you could cut it with a knife. With you being mean to Dean and Dean barely defending himself, barely hitting back.

You get to the room, put your bags down and Sam is already by the door again. You and Dean both look at him, wondering where he’s going.

“I’m getting another room,” he says, face serious. “And you two,” he continues, “you two will stay here and figure out what the hell it is that’s going on, because I’m not dealing with it anymore.”

You open your mouth to speak but Sam turns to you and says: “No, figure it out.” Your mouth closes. Who knew. The little guy could actually be imposing.

“Sammy, this is stupid,” Dean says, because of course Dean’s allowed to say something. “You’re grounding us?” Sam nods. “Yeah.”

“Or what?” you ask, before Sam can stop you. He looks at you both, then shrugs, and then he’s pulling the door closed behind him.

There’s silence, and then Dean says: “Well, that was ominous.” He looks at you, maybe hoping you’ll laugh or agree, maybe you can dogpile on Sam for a little while, but you don’t.

You feel terror sitting in your jaw and in your hands. You don’t want to talk to Dean. You don’t want to figure anything out. You want to shed your skin and start your life over and go to sleep and never wake up, but none of these seem to be realistic options.

So you sigh, instead, sitting on the bed nearest to you. There’s not even any alcohol in the room, since you’re in a dry county, and of course Dean’s thinking the same thing.

“He couldn’t have done this when we were in Vegas?” he mumbles. Still no reaction from you as you hear him sit down on the other bed behind you. You hate this. You feel like an animal in a cage. You feel itchy.

“Okay, should we do this?” you hear Dean behind you, and you think you hear him slap his thighs.

You finally turn around to him, slowly, your face unbelieving. He’s sitting there, looking prettier than ever.

“What?” he says.

“Just... you,” you reply. “I can’t believe you’re being so gung-ho about this.” Dean inclines his head. “If Sam thinks—”

“No offense,” you say, fully intending offense, “but screw your brother, okay? I’m not a child. I’m not getting sent to my room without dinner.”

And of course, at that you see it, that child, that child-thing, sprawled out, little eyes looking at the ceiling but seeing nothing. You almost shake yourself.

Unsure if Dean notices, you stand up, but instead of walking outside, you pace.

“He’s not wrong, you know?” Dean finally says, but you don’t stop moving.

“About what?” you ask, without looking at him.

“You’ve been a real asshole the last couple of weeks,” Dean answers.

And God, why does it feel so good that he calls you that?

You stop pacing, turn to him, a grin that’s probably a little psychotic-looking forming on your face.

“Now was that so hard?” you ask.

“What?” Dean asks.

“Not treating me like a little porcelain figure?” you say. “Calling me an asshole?” Dean shrugs. “Well, don’t act like one if you don’t wanna be called it.”

He doesn’t get it, doesn’t get that this is exactly what you want, but it doesn’t matter because even that little bit of disrespect makes the itch in your flesh feel a little less overwhelming.

“I know I have,” you say. You nod at him. “And you’ve been acting like a wuss.” Distantly you realize that you are actually doing what Sam told you to do. You’re talking about it, or at least you’re acknowledging that there is something to talk about, which is more than you’ve done in this whole time. So, good for Sam, you think. And you keep going.

“What happened, Dean?” you ask, your arms going wide. “You saw me upset once and now you’re too much of a bitch to joke around?” You feel yourself teetering at the edge. This could go so horribly wrong but you can’t stop tap-dancing at the edge of that volcano.

“You’re gonna protect my feelings?” you ask in a mocking tone, and you think your voice sounds shrill. “Dean Winchester always saving everyone but himself, huh?”

Dean’s looking down, his face tense and you can’t help but keep pushing.

“I’m an asshole?” you say, and for some reason there are tears burning in your eyes and you don’t know why. “Well, you’re a pussy,” you spit.

“That’s enough,” Dean says, and his voice is cold as steel. He looks up at you, still sitting on he bed, and he terrifies you for a second. But the terror is a thrill.

You scoff at him. “Fuck you if you think you can tell me what to do.”

He gets up faster than you can react. You gasp in fear when he’s suddenly in front of you and then he’s pushing you against the wall behind you. It’s only a foot or two, but the impact hurts beautifully, making clearness and focus rush through you for a second, but it’s over before you can even really enjoy it.

You want to whine at the loss of it, at the sudden lack, everything turmoil again, like a family of rats has nested in your chest. You need it back, that focus.

“Fuck you, Dean,” you say, too joyous by half about your words. “Gonna show me what a man you are? You’re pathetic.”

You see his hand raise and form a fist out of the corner of your eye, and something goes through you, something horrible and you think he’s going to hit you.

You look at his hand and something like a yes comes out of you. It sounds almost sexual, and maybe it is.

Dean’s threatening demeanor drops immediately. It takes him a second to understand what caused your outburst, and he looks at his own hand and then he looks at you.

He wasn’t going to hit you, you suddenly realize. He’s balling his fist because he’s mad, and you see it from the angle he’s holding it. You’ve seen Dean throw a million punches, and this isn’t how he would do it, even if he was mad with anger.

But Dean understands, understands that that’s what you thought he was doing and that that’s what you wanted him to do.

He takes a step away from you immediately and your stomach drops. His face is as open as it’s ever been. He finds your gaze and you’re not sure what he sees in yours but you know what you see in his.

You’ve gone too far, you can feel it in your blood. You can see it on his pretty features. This is his weak spot. The holy part you’re not allowed to touch just like there’s parts of you he’s not supposed to touch. His own fear of himself, of his clever and precise violence. The one that’s been cultivated in him from the time he was four to however old he is now. The one he keeps at bay, no matter what, for those he loves and wreaks on those he doesn’t.

There’s that clear line that neither you and Dean are supposed to cross, and everything beyond that is below the belt. And you just went for it.

He’s fought so hard to bury that part of himself, so that the people he cares about never need to be scared of him like he was scared of the people that were supposed to care about him. It’s cost him everything. And you just came for his throat.

This is so far beyond your usual arguing. This just hurts.

“I’m—” you start, but Dean’s never been good at listening, so you falter immediately. You feel tears burning in your eyes. God, he looks so sad. You blink, run the back of your hand over your nose. It’s deadly silent in the room.

Dean looks, and you don’t know how else to describe it, like a dog whose owner is holding a news paper. He knows what’s coming and he can’t stop it. He’s fear and shame and disgust in himself. You don’t want to give a shit. He’s not your mess to clean up.

But you do. Of course you do. Just like he did. He cared enough to let you verbally pummel him for weeks, barely keeping his fists up to deflect.

You say his name, or you think you do, and then suddenly he’s moving. He’s walking towards the door and you don’t know why and you don’t know how but you know you need to stop him. If he walks out that door you don’t think you’ll ever see him again.

So you rush forward, manage to get yourself between him and the door.

“Dean, don’t,” you say and he says: “Get out of my way.” His voice is deep and he's not yelling and in a way that is way scarier. But you can’t move. You can’t let him leave.

“Please don’t go,” you say, hoping you can simply convince him. You lean your back against the door, and you’re pretty sure he won’t grab you and simply pull you out of the way, because you can see his hands are trembling.

“I’m sorry,” you say, because your stupid pride has been stopping you, but now it’s the least important thing in the world. “I shouldn’t have pushed you,” you say, but you’re not sure he can hear you. “I shouldn’t have said those things. I just wanted to make you mad.” His head shoots up.

“Why?” he pushes out through gritted teeth.

“Because I couldn’t stand that you pitied me,” you say. God, Sam would love this. A real heart-to-heart. How precious.

Dean frowns. “I don’t pity you,” he says, disdain in his voice.

“Yes, you do,” you insist. “You’ve been pulling your punches for weeks. And it made me… it just made me so angry.” Dean shakes his head.

“You’re insane,” he says, and then he goes for the door, reaching around you to open it.

“No!” you say, and you push him back. He stumbles, just a little bit, but it makes him look so angry that you press yourself harder against the door. Just like you thought, he’s not going to move you out of the way, but that doesn’t mean he won’t try to get around you.

“Move,” he says, and then: “Get out of the fucking way.”

“Make me,” you bark back. Dean stands there for a second, and you think he will. You think you have completely misjudged the situation and he will make you move. But he just goes for the door knob again, reaching around you. You push your arms against him. Now that he knows you’ll try to shove him, he plants his feet and there is no way you can move him.

He’s so close to you and so angry and you don’t know what to do, you don’t know how to get yourself back and you don’t know how to get him back.

Your mouth lands on his before you even know you’re going to do it. Dean flinches and immediately moves back. He looks shocked, and you try to congratulate yourself because it worked. Even though that wasn’t what you were doing. You weren’t trying to stop him, you were just trying to kiss him.

It’s fucked up to do it like this, in the situation you’re in. But then you’re both pretty fucked up.

Dean swallows, and looks unsure. Both of you are breathing hard and for a second he seems to just listen to that, so you do too. It’s erotic, and you don’t know how but you feel it do something to you. Dean’s gaze meets yours. He’s either about to kill you or fuck you.

He moves forward and presses you against the door. You think for a second that he’ll try for the door again, but he doesn’t. His lips find yours, but what you do can barely be called kissing. It’s a battle, like everything between you is, but you manage to get your hands into his hair, grabbing it, making him grunt. He pushes you harder against the door and you find it difficult to breathe and it’s perfect.

You lean your head back at the feeling of containment, and Dean goes for your throat. He runs his teeth over a sensitive spot, making you buck and then he’s sucking against the skin so much it hurts. Your grip tightens in his hair and he makes a noise.

Before you know it you’re pushing his jacket off his shoulders, his hands barely leaving you to let you, and then his flannel goes next. When he’s free of it, he grabs your wrists and pins them over your head, attacking your neck again. You moan, you can’t help it and he ruts himself against you.

You move your head to catch something of him, anything, and you manage to get at his jaw, nipping at him. Dean flinches, but he lets you do it. Then his hands let go of your wrists and travel down your arms, down and down, until they are at your chest and he roughly squeezes your breasts. Another moan escapes you and then you’re dropping your hands and he’s dropping your tits, moving on to your hips instead.

You find his crotch first, press your hand against it, agitating what you find there. Dean hisses, and his mouth slams against yours again, but this time you force your tongue past his lips, keeping him there as you battle again, open-mouthed and breathing hard.

Dean’s hands wander from your hips to your ass, squeezing and then he’s pushing one of his legs between yours. You grind yourself down on him, but it’s not enough, it’s not nearly enough to dispel any of the energy you need to dispel. He’s pushing you against his leg by grabbing your ass but again, it’s not enough.

You tear one of his hands from your ass and maneuver it to your front, push it between the waistband of your jeans and your skin, shove him down. Dean doesn’t stop mouthing at you when you do it, except to groan into your mouth when he fingers make contact with your underwear.

He takes control, shoving his hand deeper until he finds you there. Both you and him are surprised by how wet you are. You’re not sure when that started but neither of you cares for much longer, when you feel Dean push two fingers into you.

You almost sob and with just enough wherewithal you unbutton your jeans to give him room to move, before you grab his hair again and lean your head back against the door. He feels good, and even though his thrusts are rough, they hit the right spots within you, forcing you to close your eyes at what feels like electricity running through your body.

“Fuck, yes, just like that,” you pant and feel Dean’s plush lips against your jaw. He’s not kissing you, not exactly, just making contact, just getting as close to you as he can. You pull his hair a little and feel the air come out of him when he moans.

You don’t know how it’s possible, but he's getting you to the edge fast, and you have high-pitched, desperate moans leaving you soon. Then you’re pushing him away.

His head snaps up, and he looks worried for a second, but all you want is more of him. His hands leaves you, and you’re pulling at his t-shirt, trying to get it off him. You manage, and then he’s tugging at your shirt.

“Get that off,” he says, and his voice is rough and deep, the timber of it running through you. You do, pull it over your head and he goes for your bra before you have even pulled it off your arms. He nearly tears it off you, and then he reaches around you, bringing you close, as he pushes his hands into the back of your pants to push them down.

You use the closeness to open his jeans but then you have to step out of your pants and underwear and shoes as Dean makes them fall to the ground, to avoid stumbling.

Dean manages to turn the two of you, so that you are with your back to the bed and he pushes you towards it. When you get close you let go of him and crawl onto the bed, but you kneel on it, facing Dean. The two seconds it takes you are enough for him to unbuckle his jeans the rest of the way and drop them, along with his underwear, step out of them and his shoes and socks and kick them to the side.

He’s there in front of you, all glorious nakedness, but neither of you wants to lose a second to thinking, to wondering what it is you’re doing, so instead you collect some spit in your mouth, then run your hand along your tongue to collect the moisture and a moment later you have him in your hand.

Dean inhales sharply but you don’t hurt him, only stroke him until he’s fully standing. He’s beautiful, all of him, and if you took a second to admire him, you would see just how beautiful, but you can’t. You don’t want to break the spell.

He grabs you by the ass again, pulls you close to him, and you can hear him breathing hard, grunting at what you’re doing to him. One hand goes to the back of your head and he kisses you, really kisses you this time, roughly, yes, desperately, yes, but it’s still a kiss.

You stroke him faster until he grabs your shoulders and shoves you down on the bed. You land on your back, hair flying into your face and an insane chuckle leaves you. Maybe you’re losing your mind. Or maybe this is what you’ve been craving all along.

Then Dean’s over you, and he’s kissing you again, his hand running from your breast to your neck where he holds you tight, pulls you roughly against him. His erection is pressing against your stomach and you want him.

You get your mouth off his, and then you’re turning around under him. Dean barely leaves you room to do it, but you manage, and then you’re pushing your ass against him. He grabs your hip, strokes it.

And then he kisses your back and you freeze. He does it again, leaning over you, kisses, and then bites you there, but gently.

You gasp and you need him suddenly, need him so bad. Need him to make you feel anything else.

You push your ass up again and this time he does it, does what you want him to do. He lines himself up and then he’s pushing into you. A whine leaves you as you work yourself down on him and his hands are grabbing you everywhere, touching you everywhere and it makes you almost believe that you can be free of all this anger if only Dean keeps touching you.

He starts driving into you and for a second it’s overwhelming, so much, too much and too fast. Your breathing stutters and you need to concentrate on regulating it. But then Dean finds a rhythm and suddenly you can breathe. One hand of yours wanders back, grabs his underarm where he’s holding you and he grabs your elbow, holding onto you.

“Dean—” is all you can say, and his thumb strokes your arm.

“It’s okay,” he says and he’s driving into you, making you gasp again, which quickly turns into a moan.

“Yes,” you pant, “yes, don’t stop.” He doesn’t. He keeps up the pace, his thighs meeting the backs of yours with loud slaps until you think you're going to pass out.

“Fuck,” he mutters, and then suddenly he’s pulling out of you. You turn around to see what’s wrong but then he’s turning you around and your back meets the mattress again. Dean leans over you, pushing your leg higher.

“I want to see you,” he says, and your next inhale lets you feel the spiral again, brings tears into your eyes. Don’t be kind to me, you think, but at the same time you crave it. You want to see him gentle, want him to see his own gentleness.

He kisses you again, and you return it, wrap your arms around him and pull him close. He sighs against you, and then he’s pushing into you again. Your head falls back, you almost whimper and as Dean enters you, pushing your leg up against your torso, his hand cupping your cheek and his thumb running over your lips, you wonder when this turned from a hate fuck into whatever it is now. You find his thumb with your mouth, kiss it.

Dean leans closer to you and your hands go into his hair again. You still pull it, still make him grunt, but in response he lays his face against yours. What is this? you just have time to wonder when the movement of his hips makes you see starts.

He keeps going and going and going and you whimper and come and he holds you through it while tears run down the side of your face from the intensity, but still he keeps going.

“Fuck, I—” he mutters and you feel him throb inside of you, so you pull him close, bring your mouth to his shoulder and bite. Dean grunts, and then you kiss the place you just bit and he comes inside of you.

For a second you’re terrified he’ll roll off you immediately, so you wrap your arms around him. Dean moves into you once or twice more, but it’s just a reflex. His forehead is against your shoulder.

You find you’re stroking his back and just as you wonder if you should stop, Dean flexes his back, his shoulder blades moving under your fingers and he says: “Keep doing that.” So you do. Because you’re not ready to look at his face yet. You don’t know if you ever will be. But eventually you have to.

Eventually Dean needs to move, pulls out of you and rolls himself to the side. Your breathing has quieted down. For a moment, he’s not looking at you, but staring up at the ceiling.

Little eyes staring up at the ceiling.

A sob goes through you and Dean turns to you. He rolls himself towards you and then, after a moment of hesitation, pets your cheek.

“Did I hurt you?” he asks. You shake your head.

“No,” you say, your voice quiet. “You made it not hurt for a while though.”

He nods, and you’re pretty sure he understands exactly what you mean.

“I’m sorry,” you say then.

“You don’t have to—” Dean starts, but you interrupt him.

“I know what I made you feel. What I made you think. I’m sorry.” He opens his mouth to say something, then closes it. “I will never do it again,” you add. He runs his thumb over your chin.

“I’m sorry I made you feel like you needed to be pitied,” he says. “I’m sorry I…” he sighs. “I didn’t want to scare you.”

You nod. “I know,” and then: “I knew you weren’t going to hurt me. I knew but I wanted you to.” He nods again.

“Why? I mean why did you want me to?” You shake your head. “You know, Dean.”

And you see it in his eyes, because of course he knows. It’s the reason he sometimes drinks until he passes out. The reason he takes more punches than he needs to. Because it’s better than feeling the other thing.

He tugs some hair behind your ear and you lean into the touch. Suddenly the gentleness doesn’t hurt. Suddenly it’s everything you want.

You both lie like that for a while, just touching, just looking at each other.

“So what now?” you say. “We just go back to how it was before?” Dean thinks for a second.

“I don’t think that would work,” he says finally, and you have to agree. “Maybe,” he says, “we can both turn it down a few notches?”

You nod. “Probably a good idea.”

“And this,” he says motioning to nothing, but you know he’s talking about what you just did. “We can see where this leads?”

That one you have to think about for a moment. You feel that old thing roar its head in you, the one that wants to destroy any possibility of anything good possibly coming out of something gentle, something sweet. You fight it, and nod.

“That sounds good,” you say. Then you take a deep breath. “Do you think this is what Sam imagined when he told us to sort things out”

Dean huffs. “I really hope not.”

You smile a little, and then you do something daring.

Moving your shoulders, you scoot closer to Dean. He wraps his arm around you, holds you close.

You still look at each other, like two skittish animals but eventually, the warmth and comfort of another body so close overtakes you.

You can’t fight the need to be close so you stop, stop fighting it.

Dean’s hand rests on your chest and this time you’re sure you can feel his heartbeat. You listen to it, try to focus on it.

Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum-dum.

You’re too tired to fight. You always thought you’d need to be strong to stop, but it turns out tired works too.

Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum-dum.

You’ve never enjoyed it anyway.

#sorry's fics #dean winchester #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x reader #spn #supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #spn smut #spn fanfic

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spaceyaemonds · 2 months ago

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Jack would be so tender with his daughter. I bet the reason she’s such a daddy‘s girl is because he just is always there. A silent protective figure, such a beacon of safety and I think Jack, even in his bad moods, he needs to be with his daughter. Even to his surprise because he’d think he was terrible company (would want to spare her) bc he’s moody and cynical. Even though she’s a baby they have a crazy understanding where they’re just at peace with one another, they kinda crave this silent closeness. It’s very cute/jealously inducing to mom.

I also think PittFest would be something hard for him to swallow because even though his family is safe, (they never went) it’s an event he can see his (eventual) wife and daughter going to and the knowledge that the world is kind of getting more crazier frankly terrifies him.

i love these future snippets of the cute domestic family. I’d love to see any more HCs if you got them. Like he comes home from a day shift and takes a bath with her while mom gets bedtime ready. He’s just in awe of her little baby toes and little rolls of fat as she splashes around getting out all that energy. He gives a big kiss on the head as she squawks in annoyance because he interrupted her playtime.

Or Jack and Robby trying to build a playhouse and absolutely flailing because there’s so many instructions and pieces. they end up taking the entire afternoon and rage cleaning several times, but after a couple of beers, they managed to complete it. of course, bug is annoyed the whole time she can’t play with her toy but playing princess tea party with her daddy and uncle Robby soothes her a bit.

Or Mama is getting a postpartum check up and Abbott going down to the ER to bother Robby with the baby, said baby getting whisked away by Dana, Perlah and Princess as they coo over her doughyness and gummy smile. Abbott is kinda like…they just stole my baby as he chats to Robby.

also like a little blurb of Collins and what she thinks of Mama and Bug. She was very present in the beginning of her life as she was still with Robby and she still has that closeness, but she did take a step back during the break up. Maybe it was her experience with bug that helped hee realize she wanted motherhood and during the Season 1 shift she sees Bug being a precocious toddler and it’s a bit of a tough pill to swallow. There’s like a complex feeling of love and jealousy, but then shame because of the jealousy, but overall love and sadness. She doesn’t regret her decision of abortion obviously because it was a right thing for her to do for herself at the time (and the optics of her relationship with Robby as her senior and honestly who knows if Robby could’ve handled it). But there’s always that ‘what would’ve happened’ especially as she’s facing infertility and since it seems that mama had a similar thing happen to her and made the opposite decision. Maybe as she’s driving home, she calls Mama and mama gives her her perspective about what she was feeling in deciding to keep Bug/how Abbot at that time was honestly a very reliable person and that helped her making her decision and how she thinks Collins is going to be such a great mother.

it’s not an over exaggeration to say I’m obsessed with this universe, and we’re constantly getting fed. You’re such a great writer and you really bring these characters to life. Thank you so much.

hi friend!! ahhh okay i’m answering this below the cut!!!

Jack loves his girl. Literally the second he sees her, his whole life is changed. He doesn’t leave her side unless he absolutely has to, which is more often than he would like for it to be. It’s a big reason why when he gets time with her, he just sits and holds her, at least while she’s still small enough to just want to be held. Before they all lived together, some mornings after a really rough shift, he just shows up at readers place, asking in a really solemn voice if he could just see her for a few minutes. Those mornings, he tends to spend the whole day with her while reader works unless she’s still being breastfed, then mom gets her for feedings. I definitely agree that he thinks he’s bad company! Especially as she starts getting older! But even then, they can just sit in silence, him watching her color or play, and her just wanting to be close to her daddy. Mom absolutely adores it, but can’t help but wish her baby wanted to do that with her too (even though bug literally goes to her mom all the time and they do almost everything together LOL).

When he goes home after PittFest, all he wants is to sit on the couch with his girls. When he heard the news, they had been getting ready to go to the aquarium, and he knew they were disappointed. He had to beg them to just stay in the house until he called. All he could think about was what would have happened if they had gone to the aquarium and it happened there? It shakes him to his core, and he spends that night extremely quiet with his baby on his chest and reader gripped to his left side.

I love them too!! This is just so much fun for me, I genuinely could not have imagined the amount of love that this is receiving, and I just am so glad to do and share all of this with you guys!! I have LOTS of headcannons!!

I think he craves doing the bedtime routine (feeding her, bathing her, putting her jammies on) after working a day shift because 1) it gives mom a little break but 2) that’s all the time he gets with her when he works days usually. He feels like he misses SO much that he just craves it. He also loves the baby smell mixed with the nighttime lotion, he’ll never admit it, but it helps him sleep at night too. He definitely also does interrupt whatever she is doing when he walks in, and though she sounds annoyed, her little laugh makes the annoyance worth it to him!

I’m gonna do separate drabbles for Robby and Jack building a playhouse, Jack taking the baby to the ER while mom gets a checkup, and the dynamics with Collins!!! Keep an eye out for those, I have lots of thoughts on them!!!

friend😭🥹🩷 this is so so sweet and i love how much you love it! your (and others who leave comments and asks) kind words keep me motivated to write! i know i said earlier, but i genuinely could have never imagined all of this positivity and kindness coming from my lil idea! thank YOU so much for your kind words!! i am so so SO excited to keep sharing it with you!! please feel free to send ANY and all thoughts/headcannons, just anything like this!!

#🐝 answers asks #🐝’s anons #the pitt x reader #jack abbot x reader #dr jack abbot x reader #(tagging for navigation purposes #i apologize if it annoys anyone if i clog up the tags #i literally love this little universe so much #and i love talking about it with you guys #and just ugh #sharing this with you guys has brought me so much joy you have no idea🩷

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rosenclaws · 2 months ago

Note

Headcanons for what the first kiss with each version of Logan would be like 😳👉👈 ty for considering! ☺️

YESS so cute!!

First Kiss with each Logan!

Origins Logan -

So, you work at one of the shops in the small town closest to where Logan lives. He really only makes a trip there once a week but he always shows up on a day where you're working because well...he wants to see you. Its a lot of back and forth flirting until he asks you out to dinner. He makes you dinner in his cabin and you two eat outside and watch the sunset and he absolutely drives you home because he's a gentleman and before he can drive off you lean into the drivers side window and give him a soft peck on the lips before a hurried goodnight falls from your lips and you run to your house and hurry inside. It's like a movie where you close the door and lean back against it, your heart racing while Logan sits in his truck completely in shock but with a smile on his face as he drives off.

Trilogy Logan -

Your first kiss happens after a long mission. Things didn't go the way any of you expected and the confidence you all had going into it was completely drained. Just complete silence on the way home on the jet and even Scott can tell to push the debrief to the next day. Everyone just needed a nap. But sometimes after a mission like that you just can't sleep which is how you find yourself sitting on the kitchen counter eating cereal at 3am. That's where Logan finds you. He can't really sleep either. He would join you on the counter but he doesn't want to break it so he settles for leaning next to you. It starts with playful banter but it turns to something deeper when the mission comes up. You were scared of losing Logan and you know he can heal like crazy but you can't shake it and Logan feels the same way. It's like, he's standing between your legs and his hands are on your arms as he lets you see this vulnerability he rarely shows and you two kiss and it's fucking amazing.

DOFP Logan -

This is my vision alright. You're both professors and it's a totallll flirty will they won't they kind of thing. Classrooms are literally across from each other and everyone can see the two of you are crushing hard but you both enjoy playing this game to see who cracks first. You think Logan will and he thinks you will so it's just. Unbelievable tension that makes everyone so sick of it and wishing the two of you would just give it up and admit your feelings. Which is how a poor student who was just looking for the broom finds the two of you mid make out in the closet after those feelings have finally been spilled. You both argue who cracked first but the truth is it was both of you. Seriously just get a room.

Old Man Logan -

This is a much more intimate moment between the two of you. Probably after a fight about your place in his life. You want to help him, to carry some of the weight that's been forced on his shoulders and he doesn't want you to. He tells you he's fine and he doesn't need your damn help and his words hurt but you stay strong. You care deeply for him. You've fallen in love with him. He doesn't understand why the hell you're still here. You should be running far far away from him but you're still here. I see him collapsing into an old rundown plush chair. He's tired and he's afraid of letting you in but you're not scared of him. You crawl into his lap and its a gentle but needy kiss from both of you. His hands resting on your waist getting more and more desperate as he slowly starts to let you in.

Worst Logan -

It's messy and hot and very desperate but fuck is it a first kiss to remember. Logan has been fighting his feelings for you since the moment he saw you. He wants you but he can't have you and it's driving him crazy. You just won't quit it either. Constantly seeking him out, being nice to him. It's weird, its nice, and it's so not helping his feelings. The kiss comes after he kind of explodes, basically telling you to stay away from him because he can't control himself and he wants you so bad. He wants everything from you, the soft moments too. You basically just tell him to shut up and to kiss you. Which results him him pretty much pushing you against the wall and kissing you. It's really hot tbh

#logan howlett #logan howlett x reader #logan howlett headcanon #wolverine x reader

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wanders-in-wonderland · 10 months ago

Text

Lover Boy

Trying something very new with writing from the male character’s perspective! Let me know what y’all think and if you’d like this reimagined from another perspective!

When I saw them together, I saw red. She made a mistake breaking up with me. And she certainly made the wrong decision to let herself get involved with him. I was pissed when I’d heard he’d asked her out and furious to hear that she’d agreed.

He doesn’t deserve her. He can’t treat her right, he can’t take care of her the way she needs. She needs me. She’s mine and it’s time to remind them both of that.

It wasn’t hard to figure out their date night plans. Not at all difficult to follow her car to their dinner reservation (what kind of man lets the woman drive them to a date). Not a challenge to slip into her car while it was parked outside the restaurant (she never asked for her spare key back). Drugging them was easy, a quick syringe to the neck and they were both out cold before they could understand what happened. I put him in the trunk, tied up nice and secure (and very uncomfortably). Her I move to the passenger seat. I buckled her in, kissed her forehead, and made sure her head was resting just right so her neck wouldn’t cramp during our drive. In an hour, we were in a cabin, deep in the woods, with no one else around to hear the noise that tonight’s events would bring.

I moved her into the house first. Gently, lovingly, carefully. I took my time pulling off each article of clothing. She’d worn the red dress I love and it made me fume that she wore it for another man. But there’s time later to let my anger loose. For now, I tied her down to the bed (our bed). Prop her upper body up so she’s comfortable. Used the softest silk ropes I could find because she deserves the best. I stare down at her beautiful form, running my fingers down her body.

“Soon, you’ll understand that you’re mine again,” I promised.

Next is his turn. I dragged him into the house. Dumped him onto a chair, cut off his clothes, and strapped him down. He gets duct tape and zip ties. Positioned him just right so he gets to see all of her splayed out on the bed.

And now, I wait.

She woke up first. I knew she was waking up when her eyebrows got the little crease in between them and she scrunched her nose. That’s how she always wakes up. I watch her eyes slowly blink open, watch her try and move to no avail, watch as panic takes over her mind and fear makes her struggle.

“No honey, don’t struggle, I’d hate to see you hurt yourself.”

Her eyes dart to mine and I can tell she’s pissed.

“What the fuck! What the hell is going on? Why the fuck am I tied up and naked?”

She hadn’t noticed him yet. Good, because all her attention should be in me, like always.

I walk to her and sit at the edge of the bed, running my fingers along her face. She jerks her head away from me but I grab her chin and lean in close.

“I’m reminding you who you belong to. And correcting your behavior,” I say to her before slamming my lips against hers. She tastes just the way I remember and she reacts the way she always did, parting her lips and letting me dominate her mouth.

I groan softly against her and I feel her whimper into my mouth. I pull back and I feel a rush of possession when she instinctively tries to follow me. Her eyes are glazed and I can tell I’m getting to her.

I press my forehead against hers. “You are fucking mine. But clearly you forgot that at some point and now it’s my job to remind you. And teach him a lesson too while I’m here.”

I see the confusion on her face and step back so she can get a good eyeful of her date, naked and strapped to the chair.

She gasps, “What the actual fuck? You’re crazy, that’s why I broke up with you!”

I laugh as I step back towards her date. “You love my crazy, don’t try and deny that.”

She shakes her head, pulling harder at her restraints. I grin at her, “I think it’s about time we wake up your lover boy before he misses the show.”

There’s a glass of water on the side table. I snatch it and unceremoniously splash it over her date’s head. He wakes up with a gasp.

“What the fuck?! Who the fuck are you? Untie me, you fucking asshole!” He’s loud as he struggles in his chair.

I take enormous pleasure in sending a sharp backhand across his face. I hear her gasp and shout at me to stop. He continues to yell so I slap him again.

He’s pulling hard against the chair and I’m sure the duct tape hurts but I had that chair reinforced and bolted down in preparation for this.

“Shut the fuck up,” I direct the order to him but I hear her quiet behind me too. Good girl, she’s always been so good at following my orders.

I turn towards her and smile, “Honey, do you want to explain to our guest of honor who I am?”

She stares at me, shock painted across her face. Her head shakes a little and she opens and closes her mouth at a loss for words. I smirk and turn to lover boy.

“I’ll make this simple for you. She’s mine. You infringed upon my property and this is the consequence. Now she got it in her head that she’s better off without me so I’m here to correct that. And you are here because you had the gall to think that you had a chance with her. Tonight is a night of righting wrongs.”

Lover boy starts yelling again, cursing and threatening. I pick up the roll of duct tape and rip off a sizable piece that I slap over his mouth. Right now, it’s his turn to be a spectator and spectators don’t talk.

I turn to her.

“Fuck, I missed you, darling.” I brush my fingers along her cheek and she flinches away from me.

“Now now, don’t embarrass me in front of company,” I chide as my fingers run down her body.

I hear her mewl softly as my fingers meet her core. She’s fucking dripping and I laugh softly into her ear. “You’re mine, aren’t you? No one else can make you so fucking wet like this. No one else can touch you like this and make you feel this good.”

I punctuate the end of my sentence with a sharp pinch of her clit and she cries out, arching into me.

“Fuck, please, ah, right there.” Her voice is breathy and it makes my cock throb. My fingers work her pussy effortlessly, applying just the right amount of pressure against her clit while I slide a finger into her. Her pussy clenches around me and I groan.

“I know for a fact your worthless lover boy could never make you feel this good,” I croon, sparing a derisive look towards him.

His face is red and furious as he makes muffled threats from behind the duct tape across his lips. My fingers don’t let up on her and I can hear her moans and whines over him.

I glance at his lap and I laugh. He’s rock hard. “You fucking piece of shit. Who gave you permission to get hard over my girl huh? You like how she looks like this, tied up and at my mercy? You think you could make her sound like this?”

I slam my fingers into her, the sound of her dripping cunt creating a symphony with her cry of pleasure. His cock bobs between his legs and I watch his hips thrust up almost imperceptibly.

I turn my attention back to her. “You see that, darling? He’s fucking aching for you right now. But he can’t fucking have you.”

I can tell by the way she’s writhing against me that she’s close. “Come on baby girl, I know you’re so close, cum for me. Scream for me so he knows how fucking good I make you feel.”

I slide my lips against her neck and my fingers work faster. Without any warning, I sink my teeth into the sensitive skin of her neck and she wails. Her pussy clenches around my fingers and her hips are trembling but I don’t stop.

“That’s it, good girl, just like that.” I work her through her orgasm until she’s gasping and shaking against me. Only then do I pull my hand away from her pussy. Her body is completely limp, her eyes hooded as she stares at me. I stand up off the bed and turn to see how lover boy is faring.

He’s breathing hard, his eyes filled with a combination of anger and lust. I know he wishes it were him touching her, making her scream. I grin at him and walk over. My fingers are still coated in her juices when I smear them across his face, making sure that he smells her.

He lunges at me ineffectively and I let out a deep laugh. It feels so fucking good to show him his place.

“She smells good huh? Bet you wish you could taste her. But you and I both know you will never be able to.”

“Stop, you made your point!” Her voice pulls me from my gloating. “Please, honey, I’m yours. I’ve always been yours, can we just be done with this?”

“Oh no darling girl, we’ve got a lot more ahead of us tonight,” I laugh as I slide back into the bed with her. “You see tonight is the time for me to make sure you understand how serious I am about us. And how completely you belong to me. I need to be sure you are never going to forget that.”

I kiss down her body until I’m face to face with her dripping cunt.

“Oh I missed this,” I purr softly, blowing gently against her pretty pussy. Her hips buck up and she lets out an almost silent whimper.

I don’t wait any longer and dive in, my tongue running up and down her dripping slit. I moan against her cunt, relishing in the taste of her.

I know her body better than she does and it doesn’t take long for me to drive her to the brink of insanity, pulling orgasm after orgasm from her trembling body.

“Please, I can’t, it’s too much!” Her voice is breathless as she trembles against me. I look up at her, taking in the way her tears glisten along her cheeks. This is my favorite image of her, ruined and raw, all because of me.

I smile and press a chaste kiss against her pretty pussy and sit up. “Only because you asked so nicely,” I drawl before capturing her lips in a kiss, letting her taste herself on me.

She moans into my lips and I pull away briefly, “I’m going to untie you so be a good girl for me.”

She nods. I know she’ll be good. My fingers are quick to pull apart the knots and I gently massage her extremities as I release her. I help her sit upright and I catch her staring at lover boy. His body is trembling from how hard he’s pulling at his restraints and his cock hasn’t flagged all night.

I smirk at her. “I want you to ride him.”

Her wide eyes meet mine, “What?!”

“You heard me. You went out with him for a reason, you clearly thought he was fuckable so now’s your chance.”

She’s unmoving on the bed, still in shock while I stand and walk towards him. I grab the piece of tape covering his mouth and rip it off.

“Your turn to shine, lover boy. Do you want to fuck my girl?”

“Fuck off!” His voice is hoarse but I catch the waver in his tone. I smirk, “Don’t lie to me, I know your cock’s been rock hard this whole night. So fuck her and make her cum.”

I turn to her now, “Ride him, darling. Get what you want from him because you’re not going to get another chance after tonight.”

I grab her hand and pull her up off the bed to her feet. Her legs are shaky as I lead her to him. I turn her around so her ass is pressed up against his cock.

He groans and leans his head back against the chair.

“That’s it darling, you feel his cock against your pretty pussy?” I hold her hands to keep her balanced.

“Go ahead, sit your tight cunt onto his cock for me.”

She looks at me, eyes uncertain. I smile and nod.

I watch my girl sink down on his cock. Her back arches and she lets out a small moan that makes me laugh.

“Does that feel good? Does his cock fill you up?”

She whines out a yes as her hips start to gyrate against him. He lets out a guttural groan, “Fuck you’re so tight.”

I laugh, “Ride him, darling. Make yourself feel good.”

She does exactly as she’s told. I watch as she moves herself up and down, the movement making her pretty tits bounce. I sit back against the bed and stroke myself softly, watching my girl fuck herself using her pathetic date.

Moans are spilling out of both of their mouths as she keeps moving her body in just the right ways.

“Does he feel good inside of you, darling?”

She whimpers in response, “Ah fuck, yes!”

“Yeah? You wanna make yourself cum using his cock? Greedy little thing huh, you just came your brains out and you want more?” I taunt her as I stroke myself up and down, watching the scene unfold.

“Yes! Please, I want to cum again!” Her voice is desperate as her body moves faster up and down.

I hear lover boy let out a deep groan and I smirk. “Keep going pretty girl, make yourself cum on him.”

His groans change in pitch. “Fuck no, wait, ah!” My smirk widens when I hear his voice crack and his eyes close. “Fuck wait, I’m cumming!”

I can’t contain the deep, scornful laugh that erupts out of my chest. Pathetic lover boy couldn’t even last long enough to make my girl feel good.

I watch with glee as my girl whimpers softly and slows her movements. Her eyes meet mine and I can see the wanton lust and need written all over her face.

He lets out a pathetic groan and I meet his eyes, seeing the pitiful humiliation on his face.

“You worthless dick, you couldn’t even last long enough to make my girl cum.” My voice is filled with derision.

I stand and beckon to my girl, “Come here.”

She’s quick to obey, pulling off of him swiftly. I pull her body close to mine and slip my fingers down to her dripping pussy. I gather the messy mix of his cum and her wetness onto my fingers and smear them across his chest and face. “Pathetic piece of shit,” I sneer.

“Get on the bed, on your hands and knees and face him, darling.” My girl does exactly as she’s told, arching her back and watching as I circle around to behind her.

I line myself up against her cunt and slam my cock home. She screams.

I don’t give her time to adjust to my cock splitting her open. My movements are harsh and punishing. I’m showing her who she belongs to, proving to him that only I can make her feel this good.

“You’re a worthless, disgraceful piece of shit. Didn’t even last long enough to make my girl cum.”

I bully my cock into her over and over again, hearing her voice shake with pleasure in a way that she definitely didn’t do with him.

I can feel the way her pussy clenches around me rhythmically and I know she’s close. I lean down and whisper to her, “I want you to look at him while you cum all over my cock. Make sure he knows how good I make you feel.”

She’s delirious with pleasure but I know she’ll do as I say. I laugh as I see him struggle against the chair, his face red with humiliation and anger.

“Cum for me, darling. Scream for me.” My thrusts get deeper, harder, faster and her body follows my instructions effortlessly. Her cunt clenches around me and her orgasm rips through her body. I laugh again, feeling her pussy squirt her pleasure, relishing in her rapture.

I fuck her through her orgasm and I feel my own building. But I want one more out of her. I slide a hand down to her clit and begin to mercilessly work her body. She gasps, shaking against me and I don’t give her a chance to recover.

It doesn’t take long before her cunt clenches again and this time, as she wails our her release, I join her.

We collapse onto the bed and I make sure to catch myself so she doesn’t take the brunt of my weight. I run my lips along her ear and I make one final claim, “You’re fucking mine forever.”

She whimpers, “I’m yours.”

I grin and look up at him, taking in his expression of defeat and humiliation. “You never deserved her, lover boy.

#nsft concept #overstim kink #dark fantasy #cnc kidnapping #tw noncon #cuckcold #cnc overstim #cl1t torture #cnc k!nk

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fatkish · 9 months ago

Text

Alpha Muzan x Omega Reader

Muzan is no stranger to eating omegas

He’s come across plenty of them and they’ve always smelled delicious

But you were different

Back in the Heian era, it was a popular belief that true mates existed

When you find your true mate, you’re supposedly overcome with an intense desire to be close to them. Never wanting to leave their side

Alphas will feel an immediate urge to protect their true mate and a sense of responsibility for their maté’s wellbeing

An omega will feel an immediate attraction and a sense of comfort

When Muzan caught the scent of a particularly enticing omega, he followed the scent

When his eyes met yours he felt a spark inside of him

He never believed in true mates, but since he couldn’t bring himself to devour you he decided to kidnap you instead

He brought you to the infinity castle and made sure to keep you close to him as well as order his demons not to harm you

He had no idea what he was going to do with you but your constant whines and whimpers were driving him crazy with a sense to protect and provide for you

In order to shut you up he left the castle and gathered a bunch of necessities for an omega

He brought you plenty of nesting materials for you to build a nest with as well as food

When he’s working, if you ask him to cuddle with you, he’ll say no but after a bit of your pleads and whines, he’ll relent

He’ll crawl into your nest and let you snuggle up to him

Sometimes when you’re snuggling with him he’ll bring a book and read to you

He doesn’t know why but having you close to him brings him a sense of peace

He eventually realized that the infinity castle was not a good place for you

He made Kokushibo find a small secluded house that you could comfortably live in

Muzan brought you there and made sure that any demon who came near the house would immediately recognize his scent and would leave you alone

Muzan made a small office/study for himself to work in so that he wouldn’t have to leave as often

You started a garden outside and made sure to stay within earshot of Muzan, since he gets grumpy when he can’t see you

Your garden contains lots of vegetables and herbs and there are also some fruit trees in the surrounding forest

You mostly live off the land, you have a small chicken coop and you fish in the river nearby

If there are things that you need that you can’t grow or forage yourself then Muzan will get them for you

Muzan has taught you many things such as how to make medicine from plants and plant identification

His office has a bunch of books that you’ll read. You like to collect flowers and put them in a vase in his office

When he has to leave for a bit he makes sure that either Kokushibo or Akaza are nearby to assist you should something happen

Muzan is paranoid that the demon slayers will find you and take you away

Despite his cruel and selfish personality, he grows a soft spot for you and he is whipped for you

While he travels he’ll find things that he thinks you’ll like and gets them for you as gifts

He enjoys spoiling you, he’ll buy fancy kimonos for you, expensive hairpins, etc.

Despite his gifts which you deeply appreciate and treasure, you always tell him that he’s the best gift you could ever receive

When you ask him about his work or question his studies he’ll carefully explain them to you so that you can understand

Sometimes you’ll just sit in a chair and watch him work. He’s asked you why you do this and you always tell him that you’re fascinated by what he’s doing

He’s very protective of you. Whenever you’re cooking and handling a knife, he watches you closely, making sure you don’t hurt yourself

Sometimes at night when you both are cuddling in your nest, he’ll lay his head on your chest and let you run your fingers through his hair

Sometimes he’ll let you brush his hair. He even grows his hair long so that you have plenty to play with

He does plan on turning you into a demon but he just doesn’t know when he’s going to

He first wants to conquer the sun, then he’ll turn you into a demon who can also withstand the sun

#muzan x reader #demon slayer muzan #muzan kibutsuji #kny muzan

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redrose10 · 5 months ago

Text

Here is the second and final chapter. Thank you for all the feedback. I hope everyone likes it!

Idol Husband Yoongi x Female Spouse Reader

Warnings: Swearing, angst, body insecurity, hints of cheating, jealousy, anxiety, panic attacks, slightly smutty but nothing crazy

Part 1

Part 1.5

🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒

A few days had passed since Yoongi left your home. You needed some space to process everything that had happened and he was willing to give that to you. Luckily, Hana was used to him being gone for periods of time so she didn’t question it too much and went about her days normally.

Yoongi seemed to be handling everything just fine too which only upset you more because you couldn’t understand how he wasn’t a mess. If it wasn’t for Hana needing you then you wouldn’t have gotten out of bed.

If he truly cared about you he would’ve been begging for your forgiveness. It had you questioning a lot of things. Why did he give up so easily? Why hadn’t he tried harder to explain himself? Why did he still have to text you every day to remind you to take your vitamins and drink enough water? Why did he still have to have your favorite breakfast delivered to you every morning knowing you’d be too tired to cook for yourself? Why did he have to remind you about your doctors appointment today when even you forgot about it? You hated that he was still so thoughtful and involved even when he wasn’t there because it made it harder to hate him.

Before your appointment you dropped Hana off at your parents place. She was spending the night there because you wanted her to do something exciting plus you just needed a night to yourself. Your appointment went great. The baby was healthy and you were too so you decided to reward yourself with one of your biggest cravings and a night of relaxing on the couch trying not to think about anything that had happened in the last week.

You had just gotten home with your large pizza covered in pineapple, pickles, and onions with extra anchovies on the side when there was a knock at the door. You sighed before putting the pizza down and slowly getting up to see who was interrupting your peaceful evening.

“Jimin?”, you questioned seeing the smiling man standing in front of you holding up a tub of ice cream. “Hheeeyyyy Y/N. How’s it goin?”, he sang as you stared at him before turning to walk away. “Yoongi’s not here.”, you said knowing that he was just going to follow you anyways.

“Yeah I know.”, he sarcastically said before placing the ice cream into the freezer, “He’s currently moping around on my couch driving me crazy.”

“Sounds like a you and him problem.”, you said taking a bite of your pizza while ignoring the dramatically disgusted face Jimin was making at the sight of it. It tasted like heaven to you thanks to your pregnancy hormones and that’s all that mattered.

Even though you acted indifferent to his news there was a big part of you that felt relief knowing he had been at Jimin’s and not hers.

“Please come get your husband.”, he whined before dropping down into the chair next to you, “Look I love him like a brother, but he’s sooooo annoying when he’s like this. He won’t tell me what happened, but he just keeps sitting there and pouting and if he’s not pouting then he’s crying AND I’m going to have to put a lock on my freezer. He ate my favorite ice cream Y/N. My absolute favorite. I was so excited to come home after a hard day of practice and eat some of my special ice cream but nooooo it was all gone and he didn’t even bother trying to hide the evidence.”

You continued chewing as you mulled over his words. “I didn’t know he was like that.”, you mumbled before taking another bite.

“Yeah tell me about it. He doesn’t even like caramel or white chocolate.”, Jimin scoffed.

“Has he really been crying?”, you questioned. You had known Yoongi a long time and you had only ever seen him cry once, on the day Hana was born and they were tears of joy. He certainly never cried over your relationship before, at least to your knowledge. That was not like him. He always wanted to come off as strong to you, even when he was struggling.

Jimin nodded, “Yeah he is a total wreck. He keeps mumbling something about being stupid and a divorce and then he starts crying again.”

“Divorce…?”, you whispered.

“Hey uh I hate to pry and I know it’s not really my place, but what happened between you two? I’ve never seen him like this so it must’ve been pretty bad.”, he hesitantly asked.

“He cheated on me.”, you answered deciding to just rip the bandage off.

Jimin laughed which made you quickly throw a glare in his direction so he stiffened up and cleared his throat. “No he didn’t.”, he simply said shaking his head, “Yoongi is a lot of things, but cheater is not one of them and he definitely would not have cheated on you.”

“Yeah well tell that to the woman who pulled his tie out of her purse because apparently he left it at her place.”

Jimin’s eyes widened in shock, “WWWHHHAAATT?”

You nodded, “Yep, we were at Hana’s talent show and this woman came up to us and handed him his tie from her purse. You know that cherry tie I gave him for our anniversary? She said he left it at her house. What other reason would there be for him to remove his tie other than sleeping with her?”

“I don’t know. Maybe they were eating and he didn’t want to get it dirty? He loves that tie.”, he shrugged.

“Okay then why was he eating at her house to begin with?”, you rolled your eyes, “And he just left. He didn’t even try that hard to explain himself. Maybe he didn’t want the truth to come out.”

“Y/N you know how he is…He’s all about letting things cool down. He probably just didn’t want you getting even more upset and then things would be made worse. He did mention something about the baby and stress and how it’s bad. I don’t know. He’s the one who reads like every baby book ever published.”

Nodding along you started to agree, “I guess...”

Jimin turned to look at you with a raised eyebrow. He tried to speak, but you cut him off, “I don’t blame him to be honest. I mean look at me Jimin. I look like I swallowed a beach ball. I have stretch marks and my boobs are saggy and uneven and that all happened before I even got pregnant for the second time. That woman…she was perfect. She definitely didn’t spend her Friday nights sitting on the couch eating a whole pizza by herself. Why wouldn’t he choose to be with her over me? I bet he doesn’t even find me attractive any more. He probably hasn’t since Hana was born so this was a long time coming anyways.”

You could feel the familiar burning sensation in your waterline and you began to sniffle. Jimin reached over and took your hands into his. Lightly he gave you a squeeze to remind you that he was there for you. “Y/N, deep down you know none of the that is true. Yoongi loves you. He loves you more than anything in this world. He loves every part of you. Trust me. Yoongi loves to brag about you…sometimes a little too much. I still can’t look at a can of whipped cream without feeling weird. And DO NOT even get me started on that cherry neck choker thing he likes you to wear.”

You laughed a little thankful that he was there to help you work through all of this.

“Hey do you remember what that woman’s name was?”, he asked suddenly like he had just thought of something.

You shook your head, “I don’t know. Sarah or Aera or something like that. I kind of blacked out a little.”

Jimin softly chuckled to himself before breaking out into a big smile, “You need to talk to Yoongi. Let him explain and then the two of you need to discuss all of this. Tell him how you’re feeling. It’s not good to bottle this up…for either of you.”

You nodded and whispered a small okay before Jimin grumbled something about going home to save the rest of his ice cream and quickly scurried out of the apartment leaving you to process everything alone.

You were nervous. Hana was spending the second night in a row with your parents and you weren’t sure which one of them was more excited about the extended stay, but you were happy it worked out. Because currently you were pacing around the kitchen waiting for Yoongi to come home. When Jimin came over yesterday he had made it seem like there was a perfectly good explanation for everything that had happened so you texted Yoongi at 3am asking if he wanted to come home for dinner and talk. He responded immediately with a yes and a light scolding for being up so late, but it wasn’t that easy for you to get to sleep.

There was a beep at the door before it opened and shut quickly. Yoongi’s socked feet padded into the kitchen shortly after. The familiar smell of your favorite noodle spot quickly filled the air. He held up the bag with a shy smile and the two of you ate in awkward silence. And when you were done and cleaned up and you couldn’t stall any longer you moved over to the couch to get comfortable. Yoongi took a seat next to you, but still made sure to leave some space unsure of how you would react to him and it killed you that things had gotten so uncomfortable between you both.

“How have you been Y/N?”, he asked.

“Good. You?”

“Alright I guess. I’ve been better.”

You nodded unsure of what else to say.

“I miss you Y/N. I miss you and Hana.”, he said after a while, “I want to come home.”

“Yoongi…are…are you…are you cheating on me?”, you finally questioned wanting to just get it over with. Your bluntness shocked you and him both, but at this point you were tired and you figured what else could it hurt.

You watched his body tense at the question which brought instant tears to your eyes knowing the truth.

Frantically he began wiping away those tears. You wanted to shove him away and tell him not to touch you, but you couldn’t. Having him so close to you. Smelling his cologne that usually signified safety and comfort. Feeling his skin on yours after so long was too much to bare and you needed it.

“Y/N I didn’t cheat on you. I swear on everything I have.”, he whispered trying to keep you calm.

“Then who is she Yoongi? Why did she have your tie and why were you at her place to begin with? Why are you so close with her son?”

He took a deep breath and ran a shaky hand through his hair, “Her name is Aera Kim. She is the new Director of International Relations for the company. She helps coordinate things for us outside of Korea like tours, promotions, merchandising, things like that.”

All you heard was not only is she beautiful, but she’s also really successful and powerful too which didn’t help. Yoongi could see the drop in your demeanor so he turned to look at you so you could see how serious he was.

He continued, “We were at her place a few weeks ago. All of us. All of the guys, our managers, and a few others on the team. We were discussing the upcoming album release and world tour. Things were fine and then she said that they decided to add more tour dates. Five more in the US, three more in Europe, and they want to add a whole leg of the tour in South America plus all of the promotions and interviews that come with that. AND they want Namjoon, Hobi, and I to release an EP for a rap thing.”, he took a deep breath trying to collect his thoughts, “That’s going to add on an extra six months to the tour which was already going to take almost nine months to begin with. Then if we do release this EP there will be EVEN MORE work on top of all of that. Y/N I’ll be gone for well over a year and who knows how much longer. There might be a little break here and there, but not a lot. I’m going to miss so much. I won’t be here for you or Hana or the baby. I’ll miss the baby learning to crawl, maybe even their first steps and first words. Hana already tells everyone how I’m always gone on “bwusiness” and this will only make that worse. It kills me every time I hear her say something like that. I was already struggling with going on this tour to begin with and now it has me questioning everything. I…I just…I don’t know if I can do this any more Y/N. I’ve been thinking about leaving the group. I can just write lyrics or maybe just produce. At least I get to be here more often if I I do that.”

You felt bad for him. You knew it was tough on him at times, but you didn’t know it was to this extreme.

“The more I sat there and thought about it the more I began to panic. If I back out of the group then I’m letting down the guys and the label and of course the fans. If I go on the tour then I’m letting down my family. I got so worked up during the meeting that I had a full blown panic attack. I walked out onto the balcony to get some air, but I still felt like I couldn’t breathe so I took my tie and jacket off because I felt like I was suffocating. Namjoon came out to try and calm me down and after a while they called a car to bring me home. I swear I thought I put the tie in my pocket when I grabbed my jacket so when I couldn’t find it I assumed that I dropped it somewhere or left it in the car, but I guess I left it at her place. I…Y/N I didn’t sleep with her. I promise. I barely speak to her. Her son is a huge fan of mine and he’s friends with Hana at school. Sometimes I let him hang out in my studio so I see her for like thirty seconds while she drops him off and picks him up, but that’s like the most I interact with her outside of business situations.”

Either from relief at getting this off his chest or reliving the stress again or maybe a little of both his shoulders started to shake and he buried his face into his hands. He cries shattering your heart. Your cheeks were fully soaked with your own tears now so with nothing to loose you leaned in and nuzzled your face against him pulling him as close to you as possible, “I’m sorry Yoongi. I’m so sorry. I should’ve let you explain from the start. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you. I’m sorry you feel like this. You’re not letting anyone down no matter what you do. Please don’t think like that.”

“I never should’ve given you a reason to think that I was cheating on you to begin with.”, he shook his head, “I hate that I let it get to that point. I’ve just been feeling like everything was closing in on me and I didn’t know what to do other than ignore it and hope it all gets better, but it just kept getting worse.”

“No it’s not your fault. I’ve just been so insecure and things have just been kind of weird between us and I really thought you weren’t attracted to me any more and then I saw her and how perfect she is and I panicked because I thought you had moved on to someone better.”, you said through your own tears.

Yoongi surprised you when he moved to get down on the floor to kneel in-front of you. He gently supported himself on your thighs. The warmth and pressure of his hands sent a tingling sensation through your body.

“Y/N, I…fuck I’m sorry I made you feel like that. I’ve just been so stressed and tired and then any time I did want to initiate something I felt like you weren’t into it and I didn’t want to push you or make you feel like I expected something. And you know I’m not the best at speaking my feelings so without being able to show you how I felt I didn’t know how to proceed. But you have no idea how much love I feel for you. And how attracted I am to you. Every little thing about you drives me crazy in the best way possible. I can’t get enough of you and I’m so incredibly sorry that I ever made you think any less.”

Your heart swelled as you grabbed onto the collar of his shirt pulling him up onto the couch with your lips searching for his. He laughed trying to catch himself from falling over before reciprocating the action. He straddled you enough to make sure he wasn’t putting too much weight on you as your fingers furiously undid the buttons of his shirt having it removed within seconds. It didn’t take much longer for your shirt to also end up in the same pile on the floor next to you with your bra following right after.

Even though you were burning up Yoongi’s touches left goosebumps on your skin as his fingers trailed down your side to the band of your shorts. He hooked two fingers inside. He teased you just enough to get a desperate whine out out you begging for more. You could feel him smirk against your lips because he got just the reaction he was looking for. He rocked his hips against you searching for any kind of friction and also making sure you could feel how badly he wanted you. Your brain turned into mush with thoughts of him after that.

You pulled away just long enough to catch your breath, “Bedroom?”

“Fuck yes, please.”, he said already picking you up in his arms and carrying you down the hallway while you giggled loudly in response.

Yoongi dropped down onto the bed next to you. “Are you hurt? Was it too much? I wasn’t too rough was I?”, he questioned trying to steady his breathing while pulling you flush against his body and looking you over at the same time. “No”, you shook your head, “You were perfect. I think I…I think we needed that.”

“Yeah.”, he laughed, “It’s been a while huh? Let’s not do that again.“

“Yeah I uh I guess I was afraid to let you see me like this, but it still hurt that lately you never seemed to really even try which only made me feel worse. And everyone’s always talking about how handsome you are and I just felt like I wasn’t good enough. And then I was worried that you found someone el-“

He silenced you with a kiss, “Y/N there will never be anyone else. Not in this lifetime or the next. You’re it for me.”

You smiled and relaxed into his warmth while he soothingly ran a hand over your belly as your baby happily kicked away excited to come into the world soon.

Between the relief you finally felt and his steady heartbeat lulling you it was only minutes before you had nearly fallen asleep in his arms. But then you startled awake remembering a special treat that was waiting for you in the freezer. You and the baby definitely wanted a late night snack and you were thankful it was there.

“Where are you going in such a hurry?”, Yoongi chuckled watching you closely.

“To get cleaned up.”, you grunted as you scooted off of the bed, “Jimin dropped off some ice cream yesterday and I was saving it.”

“Really?”, he asked following you into the shower, “I could go for some ice cream right about now. What flavor?”

You relaxed letting the warm water run over your sore body as you looked up at him with a cheeky smile, “Cherry.”

#bts #yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfic #min yoongi #bts x reader #bts fanfic #yoongi fic #yoongi x y/n #yoongi angst #bts yoongi #yoongi fluff #yoongi

273 notes · View notes

mgu-h · 5 months ago

Note

a bookkeeper for the people, thank you for your services 🫡

aww im just glad other people are crazy about them too!! i also keep track of things i heard repeatedly from both max and lando, or representative phrases, in order to make their dialogue sound better. if anyone is interested in some nortrell vocabulary quirks (and additional nortrell research and analysis):

phrases they both use:

That’s mint

You muppet

Let’s go!!!!

Waffling

[Anything], mate

Cheers, bro

We’ve sussed it

You idiot

Fuck off

Knob, knobhead

Bloke, brev/bruv

~Very good very nice~

Scavs (Tarkov)

Fluked it (golf)

GGs, chat

lando specifically:

‘Cause

[something], baby

C’mon Maxy boy

Oh my godt

Mega

It smells to / tastes to

Frickin’, freaking (less so now, he says fuck these days, but in the past he tended to avoid it)

[Indeterminate happy Lando noises]

[Annoying tapping or leg bouncing]

Nugget

Numpty

Joker

That's naughty

Why? (demanding)

Moron

Twat

[Criticizes himself sarcastically in the 3rd person]

max specifically:

Horrendous

Look at the state of you

Fucking hell, mate

For fuck’s sake

Jesus Christ

[repeats himself until Lando acknowledges what he said]

Shut the fuck up, I’m done

That is good, I'll give you that

Normal, normally

Don’t pull that face, none of that

Pal, buddy

Brilliant

No chance

We’ll fall out

That’s crap

What is wrong with you

All right!

It’s doing my fucking head in

An absolute fucking shocker

Are you mental

Fair play

Good lad

Honestly

Brother (calls Lando this)

other references (longer quotes, an argument transcript, relative bio of teen years, lando analysis):

Lando, mouth full, trying to communicate through just noises “mmm… mhhph mmmf” Max replies “I normally understand those to a degree, but that was another level”

Max loses his patience “Stop, like why are you tapping so loud. You know what you’re really good at? Finding a fucking annoying noise to make, and then just constantly doing it.”

Lando said, “I don’t have it, Max.” Max replied, “The fact that you said my name there means you’re trying to lie or something, that’s weird, you don’t normally say that”

Lando said, “One of the things I hate the most is being bad at something.”

[If you in any way question Max’s fashion or make a comment about his hair he will spiral and say] “Wha’ d’you mean?”

After Max ends the unhinged “golden cock” Sergei/Alexander banter, Lando tries to get back to the game, his voice returned to normal, and Max is incredulous. “Don’t just come in here like "what’s next?" all normal, like nothing happened.”

Max told Lando he would be “back in 27 seconds” because "i needed him to know i'd thought about exactly how long i would be gone before i left, instead of saying 30 seconds, which could mean anything,"

Max saw Lando before he knew him, he doesn’t remember why he was at the karting track, Lando was driving around in a little kart, he was “just tiny, mate,“ nine years old. Max even remembers the black and orange helmet Lando’d been wearing, and he just watched him for a few laps. (“You were just watching?” / “Yeah someone said, that kid won, or something.” / “I never won a race in cadets” / “They must have just said you were fast”) bankai asked: “have you been following bob around since he was nine” and max says “original fanboy”

Max talking about watching an unboxed with Lando, “I like watching them, but it is weird seeing you in them.” “Why?” “I dunno… just, I don’t know. Just don’t see you as that ‘F1 Driver,’ it’s weird. It’s just different for me.”—[Lando laughs]—“They are cool.”

Max taking too long to come back to the game, Lando sounded mad. “Stop fucking kissing her, Max, and hurry the fuck up.”

Monaco argument >> In a Dec 2021 stream, (chat called Max Lando's dog and his wag, he refuted both claims), they had an argument about max moving to monaco, lando insisting he's protecting max from being lonely and max telling him HE'LL get lonely. max claiming being alone in monaco wouldn't even bother him if he's streaming and offering to take care of the house. lando denying him, saying he's taking care of max and max's slightly sullen "thanks mate" and his Jokes like "chat, he doesn't want me there. he's ditched me. it's over. relationship's over. it's done." like the energy of the entire conversation is that they've had it many times before and max is not easy and compliant with lando leaving him behind, but lando is not listening because he's sure he knows better

Lando yelling at Max to kill a scav, Max did, but not fast enough, Lando was muttering under his breath and Max paused to take out an earbud, "Are you giving me attitude?" and then when Lando continued to bitch, mimed throwing the water from Lando's waterbottle on him

Lando ranting on iRacing in Sept 2024 that "people in racing think you never have to back out, no matter what, like that's somehow become a rule" (in iracing? he was asked) "no, in real life as well. Somehow it's become a Thing that you never have to back out, you're somehow always in the right."

Max saying "I don't want to be alone again" about getting into a different heat on iRacing and Lando singing back "story of my life..."

Lando will say things like "Look at my perfection, look at how well I do or did, I was unstoppable," other bragging just to piss Max off

Yes / No / Yes / No arguments (they just say the same statements with different and more pointed inflection each time as if to make the other person accept by force of will without any actual convincing or argument, just emphasis, as if the one who is more certain will win and the more unsure one will yield the point and pivot to a new one or end the argument. one of them always yields and pivots after a few back-and-forths)

Lando says Max is "struggling be cause he's not been kissed in the last five minutes" and that in his group chat "I record every time they kiss in public" (Max protests that he just makes the number up, like the time he said they'd kissed 44 times before 10am and Lando said "I swear it's true") and that he "can't describe how awkward it is going around with Max because he's freaking kissing" and like Lando will be driving the car in the front and all he can hear is wet kissing sounds from behind him.

Lando said about Max kissing "He just goes in so fast, you know like all the nerds you see on the movies where they kind of shut their eyes and like" he mimicked both Max sticking out his tongue and making exaggerated Mwah sounds

Max said Lando often struggles at golf but "every two months or so he'll have a blinder, and then he'll be in absolute turmoil again"

the whole recurring bit with them sharing a wardrobe, the Quadrant video with the "whose shoes are those?" "whose joggers are those? "whose hoodie is that?" bit, something the fact that it kept going even after they moved apart like in singapore 2022 lando claims max is wearing his pants, shoes, and top, and max denies it

Lando listens to the voice notes he gets in DMs and goes through them, sometimes with his mates, to laugh. He says sometimes they're very weird, that "Some people are up to no good in their lives and need to focus on.... other things... but they are funny, they are just weird. The voice notes always make me laugh."

Lando interview with Tom Daley->"I am a competitive guy and I hate losing. So you put that all together and I love being in control. I hate being out of control, so like I hate being a passenger in a car. I really hate it unless I'm like backseat you know headphones on watching a movie. I'm a terrible terrible passenger cuz I don't feel in control of of what's happening."

Max in July 2021 checking to make sure Lando wasn't watching his stream before saying "I gotta give my hats off to Lando for helping me, obviously with streaming, Quadrant, giving me a bit of purpose this year, you know, something to do and enjoy doing while I'm not racing, keep my mind off things, so yeah thanks to him... he's looked after me. I appreciate that."

Random Facts

By April 2023, Max had never seen Star Wars. By April 2025, Max had never seen any of the Harry Potter moves. He's seen a couple of Lord of the Rings though

Lando wears size 9 shoes or 8.5, he said his feet were a tiny bit bigger than Max's, but who knows if he's telling the truth about that as they can share shoes

When asked what animal he would reincarnate as, Lando said hippopotamus and Max said sea urchin (so he can he in the ocean and stab people when they step on you) or plankton

Lando always tries to get off the plane fast, impatient, walking quickly, doesn’t like getting stuck behind people

Lando said Mcdonalds chicken nuggets may be the best things ever made

Lando used to play around with a lighter

Max drinks tea quite strong, he's mentioned drinking whiskey sours

There were periods when Lando was younger where he’d play games for 36 hours straight

Max's eyes are green, Lando's are blue gray (when he built his VR character he gave it blue eyes) but have some golden brown threads in the middle that I think can make them seem greenish in some lights

Lando likes to travel with a book to look smart but he never reads it just carries it around or puts it on the table.

Lando snores loudly and people have complained about it

Max likes cats despite being allergic, Lando likes dogs more

Lando's brother's dog is named Uno. Max had a cats named Lala growing up. His family has a cat named Bobby (not after Lando, allegedly).

Lando likes to wear hoodies because they make his long neck less noticeable

Lando travels heavy with every possible bag, shoe bag, rucksack, all his computer stuff (“Im such a nerd”). He's got a tablet for movies and some games, work emails but he rarely checks those

Lando smells like Sure deodorant, and a mix of Louis Vuitton L'Immensite, Tom Ford Ombré Leather, and Dior Sauvage. He likes the smell of all of them so he puts them all on.

Lando works harder on strengthening his neck compared to some other drivers, as others can rest their head against the side while turning to deal with the G-forces, but if Lando tries that and gets his eyes off-level, he can't drive. His brain doesn't like it.

Lando will nap and his neck will be at a 90 degree angle

Max's birthday is July 29 and Lando's is November 13, both 1999

Here's the link to the bios of people who show up in Max's chat

When Lando was around 13-14yo he would spend days on designs for stickers for people's phones or visors, and would go around the paddock in karting trying to sell them to earn a little money.

Lando's favorite gifts are really big paintings people have done that he can put on his walls

When asked what kind of dad he wanted to be, he said "strict" in terms of manners and having good respectful values

In 2024 Max could check Lando's sleep stats because they're in a group with their whoop bands

Max is fine with chopsticks for everything but rice

On stream Max said that when he was at peak fitness as a driver, when he was so strong and also so light, at max he did a plank for up to 6min

Back in the days where Max used to party more, after a night out he would get back in the early hours and always order a McMuffin, he needed the McMuffin to sleep. He's stopped doing that now

Relative Biographies

So Lando’s dad’s British and his mom is from Belgium, not that it matters but I think he was raised somewhere in the country near Glastonbury in Somerset. He has an older brother and two younger sisters. Max’s parents are also from the UK but he spent his youngest years in Singapore and Malaysia, his dad’s in finance. He has a younger brother.

Max started karting in Asia, and started winning everything there, just like crazy talented and obsessed with racing. His parents decided to move back to the UK largely to let him get on the European karting track (the only one that really matters to get to the highest tiers of motorsport). He moved back to the UK when he was like 9 or 10 to kart. I think I saw that he was homeschooled, so basically all in on karting.

While Max and Lando started karting together in 2010 with Ricky Flynn Motorsport, Max said he remembers seeing Lando practicing before they met, so back in 2009 soon after moving to the UK. They spent a lot of those formative years of 10-13 together, traveling all over for races and competing against each other. Lando became the youngest karting world champion in 2013, and Max was not, but he was competitive and they were on the podium together at that time.

Lando moved up to car racing in 2014, but Max did not. It took until 2015 for him. Lando was younger than him, but already ahead. It’s hard to overstate just how fast Lando shot up through the lower ranks to the very highest tier of motorsport by the time he was 18, with McLaren putting him on teams with Fernando Alonso and things. He won everything he tried on the first attempt and moved up. Max’s career was respectable, but it wasn’t like that.

In 2015 Max started racing single-seaters, and Lando won British F4, and started going abroad and started winning there too, in Italy, in New Zealand. Max wasn’t there yet. In 2016 Max did British F4 with Carlin, a good team, winning the championship at the final race at Brands Hatch. Lando won Formula Renault, among other things. He won a couple awards at Motorsport Awards.

In 2017 Max’s first year of Formula Renault was mixed, winning the rookies’ title but was not super high in the championship, meanwhile Lando won F3.

The next year Max switched to a more successful team and did win the Eurocup in 2018, and got into the Renault driver academy. Lando got second in F2, despite leading most of the season, because of some unfortunate DNFs later in the season, George won. He was also on reserve for McLaren and drove in a F1 practice session.

In 2019 Max drove in F3, got a couple of podium finishes, but got 10th overall. 2019 of course was Lando’s first season in F1 and the birth of the Carlando juggernaut, he was a very successful rookie and rising star. He was streaming on Twitch more regularly, and got Max to set up his own Twitch channel in September 2019, to as few as like 15 viewers, playing games and hanging out with chat and Lando’s building a platform there too,

In 2020 Max raced in F3 again, but he dropped out before the end of the season, and has said that he struggled with depression. He moved back in with his parents. Lando got first F1 podium and had a great year, got huge on twitch, and he founded quadrant, became CEO of his little brand media company thing. I think he was living alone in his house in Woking.

2021 Lando’s career continues to do well, podiums and things. He almost wins at Sochi but misjudged the wet tires and slid in a really heartbreaking final laps thing. I don’t know what Max was up to early in the year, I suspect kind of aimless playing golf and streaming on Twitch and figuring things out, but by the middle of the year, Lando announced him as part of quadrant and had Max move in with him.

They streamed together and were stupid domestic, sharing clothes sometimes. I think they were both single at the beginning but had girlfriends by the end of their time together. Living together ended at the end of the year before Lando moved to Monaco and refused to bring Max along because he didn’t want to be lonely even though Max obviously really wanted to come and even offered to like take care of the house etc. Just a wild convo they had on stream in Dec 2021.

Lando Analysis

SO on one hand, lando's a simple guy in his mid-twenties with ordinary human needs, like he needs to eat, sleep, be active, play games, socialize, race, etc. he travels and stays fit, drives the car, parties and rests. most of the time he's not in distress. he enjoys life and gets to do lots of cool things. on the other hand, he’s a seething mess of ego and insecurities with complex emotional needs.

his ego is pretty big, like despite being humble about it, he knows he’s one of the best in the world at an incredibly strenuous and glamorous activity. he has the confidence it requires to get behind the wheel of an F1 car and risk all that danger to defeat legendary champions. he didn't win for a long time, but he bought into the mclaren project and stuck it out there for long enough to win.

he also has the confidence (and money) to start a company, the insight and experience about the internet to build a brand, all his years online taught him a great deal, and he has a large team of smart people around him helping him succeed. he's very young, but has quite a lot of power and authority and attention.

his ego is a bit brittle though, naturally, and there are ways in which he is vulnerable to spiraling. there are lots of reasons for that. he feels inferiority and anxiety about making people happy, and he turns inward and is intensely self-critical.

he definitely used to be small, with a big, cool older brother, in the middle with younger sisters. he has very loving and supportive parents who helped him do what he wanted to do, giving him a bedrock belief that he’s loved and special. while he gained some close friends through karting, but he was kind of a loner as a teen, a gamer, introverted and a little bit weird, until he got older and more social, getting with girls etc.

i think he's said he’s dyslexic, not interested in school, but not at all stupid, which must've been frustrating. he hates being bad at things and will try very hard to avoid it. he wants people to be happy, to please them and be accepted by them. i think he probably learned to be annoying to beg for attention, but he doesn’t want too much attention now he’s famous, or he only wants attention from a small number of people he holds close.

he just didn’t win while for a long time when he was very small, and that was formative. he didn’t really believe he could, but he did the work without having the expectation of success, because he enjoyed it yes but also i suspect as if openly wanting it would make it disappear, almost walking backward into success. even now he doesn't think of the end result, but just about what he has to do next and tries to make that as good as possible.

[analysis of lando's size kink here]

Example Argument Transcript (from here):

Max reads chat question, “Who’s better at golf?”

Lando brags. “I absolutely dominated today on the golf course.”

“But, would you say, like—”

Lando talks over him. “And, as they say in life, you’re only good, as good, as your last game.”

Max rolls his eyes and Lando shrugs like the point he made was obvious and he won.

“You done?” Max asks.

“I mean, I have no more… that was like a mic drop moment, mate. That’s like my mic just dropped. There’s nothing else to say.”

There's a long pause. Lando grins like he knows he’s being annoying.

Max can't let it lie. “But you said I am actually better than you.”

“Yeah, well you were. Until today.”

Max smiles with his mouth not his eyes. Lando grins too.

“I love how you’re actually going to commit to saying ‘Yeah, you are,’ and then you realize—”

“I AM better.”

“You’re not!” Max slaps his waterbottle against his hand for emphasis.

“Today, I was better, mate.”

“Today, yes.”

“If today was the world championship, I won.”

“No, but overall, I win more.”

“Well it doesn’t matter though, ‘cause you’re only as good as your last game.”

“Yeah, ok, you’re going to be that—”

“I’ve made improvements!”

“Are you going to be that stubborn?”

“I’ve made improvements… I’ve just overtaken you in the game of golf.”

A pause, but Max just can't let that go. “Well I won yesterday.”

“That’s yesterday. No one cares about yesterday.”

“We didn’t play yesterday, the day before.”

“No one cares about that.”

“Yeah, but I, like, if we play ten games, I’ll win seven.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No?”

“Yes!”

“Not with how well I’ve been playing la-today.”

“No.”

“Exactly.”

“No—”

“No, you won’t win.”

“—I’ll win seven.”

“No, you won’t.”

“Yeah, I will!”

“No, you won’t.”

“I will!”

“No, you sliced every single one of your drivers.”

Max turns his body to face him, looking at him directly. “No, I didn’t.”

Lando seems gleeful to have gotten the reaction, crowing, “Yes, you did.” And laughing as he said “not one driver! I think you wouldn’t’ve ended up on a fairway!”

“Yeah I did!”

“When?”

Max turns back forward with arms crossed, thinking. “On the…”

“Ok, let’s go, let’s do this, chat. First one? No. Second one? No. Third one? Water. Fourth one?”

Max interrupts his rhythm. “Where were you on the third one?”

Lando ignores him. “Where’d your fourth one go?”

Max repeats himself. “Where were you on the third one?”

Lando concedes. “I also went into the water.”

“There you go, yeah.”

“Once!”

Max affects a deeply sarcastic accent “Acting like Tiger Woods out here.”

“Once! What about all the rest of my drives? That wasn’t even a driver!”

“No—”

“That wasn’t even a drive, all good.”

“You were good, you were good with the drive today, I’ll give you that, but you’re not like that normally.”

“That’s what I said. I’ve improved.”

“Yeah no, you were shocked.”

“But I have! Improved!”

“Better, but you don’t, you won’t, if we play again tomorrow, you won’t do that.”

“Yes, I will.”

“No, you won’t.”

“Yes!”

“No chance.”

“Yes, mate.”

“I’m going to video your first drive tomorrow. Guarantee it’s right.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“I’ll try to hook it so badly—”

Max talks over him saying something else. “It’s not going to be straight. It’s not going to do that.” Max mimes a ball flying straight ahead.

“It will.”

“No chance.”

“It will!”

“You were even like… oh my god, woah.”

“Yeah, ‘cause I unlocked something.”

Intense eye contact. Max smiles, almost predatory. “Yeah? What was that? What’ve you done? Do you remember?”

“Yes, I do!”

“What was it?”

“I’m not going to tell you, ‘cause I don’t want you to get better!”

Max sits up incredulously. “It’s not going to work for my swing. It’s totally different!”

“Well it is!”

“How?”

Lando throws his arm up miming a ball curving in the air. “‘Cause you’re slicing as well!”

Max sits back and crosses his arms, looking away.

“This is Max’s shot shape.” Lando mimes a ball shooting forward and curving in front of Max’s face, almost touching him, twice, laughing between and making a loud, adolescent rocket sound, generally being extremely annoying.

“If you do that again, I’m going to draw my hand left across your fuckin face.”

“You can just do this.” Lando mimes a smacking motion on himself.

“Bosh.” Max pretends to hit him.

Lando makes a few more rocket sounds.

Max is unable to let it lie. “Normally, you’re not that good.”

“Yeah, but…”

“Today you were!”

“People improve, Max! People improve! And today, I was unstoppable.” Lando pulls out his cell phone around now, keeping it hidden, and turns on the keyboard clicking sound to prepare to annoy Max a different way.

Max rolls his eyes and repeats the word unstoppable with utmost derision. “Unstoppable… fucking hell, it’s like you’re acting like you hit nine under.”

“I was unstoppable,” Lando insists.

“Beat me by like four shots and I played horrendous. Four shots only!”

Lando begins typing and looks up at Max to watch his face, waiting to see him get irritated.

Max glowers straight ahead. “Is that loud enough?”

It does not stop. Max turns to face him again and glares and Lando gives him an impish smile.

Max says “Stop!” repressively. He reaches for the phone and Lando pulls it back, smiling widely and in an indescribable tone of voice, all the lower registers gone, sounding like he did when he was younger. “I wasn’t even typing anything for the whole thing I was just trying to annoy you.”

They look at each other. Lando said something coy and inaudible.

Max smacks him. “Don’t. Don’t do that!”

Lando cackles.

#🫶🫶🫶#nortrell #max fewtrell #lando norris

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almellow-crk · 3 months ago

Text

I come here offering offering a "Understand My Ship" in BitterSpice version. See my vision? You can always ask if You are curious of more about them. Now let me elaborate eachother thing more:

Big/Little Spoon: They both end up in each position. Depends on who is in need for more cuddles. Sometimes it's too hard and they barely spend all night/day together. They need to use all the time they can. They sleep together only when they need to, and if Burning Spice wants a cold pillow to hold onto, if Dark Cacao needs to feel the warm of a heartbeat, the other complies.

Lends/Borrows Clothes: Never happened, but if it did, Dark Cacao would give his clothes to Burning Spice. They are both almost same size.

Petnames: They have two sets of nicknames: Cacao and Spice (Main Ingredients) to be more intimate with eachother, King and Warrior when they are playfully bantering or just having fun.

Introvert/Extrovert: Self explanatory I think. Dark Cacao doesn't talk much unless he is prompted, and sometimes is adamant about sharing personal details of his life. Burning Spice does most of the talk and flirt. He says what he thinks without second thought.

Affection: They don't say "I love you" much, neither compliments. Dark Cacao writes poems, yes, but his biggest shows of love are in their escapades, how he always have ideas for secret dates, how they lay close and snuggles. Burning Spice is the same. He is the one who initiates kisses, holding hands, hugs, and more intimate stuff.

Confession: That suits better for a fic 🤫

Bugs: One fought against two dragons and Thanos, the other is literally called "Great Destroyer". Do you think a cockroach can stop them???

Driving: Dark Cacao has the patience to learn how to drive. Burning Spice would throw the manual away and drive like Sponge Bob if he was granted a vehicle.

Cooking: Both of them can cook, but Burning Spice is more attached to cooking than Dark Cacao. Is part of who he is, and he knows a great variety of dishes. He prepares some for Dark Cacao, too, in exchange of cousines. His favorite dishes are the spicy, bitter, and salad ones, while Dark Cacao prefers bitterness and seafood.

PDA: Dark Cacao is a King, he needs to maintain a certain image as the ruler of his kingdom. In secret he is very touchy and looking for contact, but in public is very weird to see him holding hands. Burning Spice doesn't really care for the public and still want to be close.

Overprotective/Chill: No need to worry here. If Dark Cacao was weak, Burning Spice would have never took interest in him. Both are strong for themselves, against eachother, and a forcé to shatter the continent if they are together. It also brings them safety and peace.

Relationship Experience: One Night Stands DON'T count as a relationship, Burning Spice. He fooled around (always on top) until he got bored of it and stopped looking for sex. He only felt attracted to strong opponents after all. Then came Dark Cacao to re-open the gates. The bitter king has had relationships in the past, too, but not many. The two most important ones were with Dark Choco's mom and Second Watcher (Yes they had something until Dark Cacao got to know his future queen). Then he opened his heart again to Burning Spice.

Horniness: Burning Spice always starts the action. Always with a kiss or touches. This is a new territory for him (As a bottom) and he is ecstatic to explore it. He likes it rough, likes to be used, it's crazy how in such activities the other's body remains so cold. Also, when Dark Cacao looses his cool and succumbs to his desires is SO hot for him. Dark Cacao is ok with having sex only once in a month. Rarely initiates, but very few times has denied the contact. He likes making love more than fucking. He likes seeing Burning Spice confused and yearning expression, how vulnerable he looks when they take their time.

Awkwardness: Burning Spice has no shame, and Dark Cacao is a little bit of a prude. That's why some times there are these tense moments where they don't know what to say or expect.

Jealousy: Burning Spice has had these thoughts, but they are easily ridden off his mind. He might feel some irritation when Dark Cacao talks about Second Watcher, or about his group of very close friends. He's vocal about it, and it earns him some irritation in return, or a roll of eyes if Dark Cacao finds it amusing.

And... That's it!

#cookie run kingdom #cookie run #burning spice cookie #dark cacao cookie #bitterspice #burningcacao #understand my ship in 5 minutes #top dark cacao cookie #bottom burning spice cookie #They switch but rarely #this is my truth

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allllium · 2 months ago

Text

Sleepy

[ Jason Todd x Reader ]

- Fluff, WC: 1005

- Jason struggles with comfort

You are usually very good at understanding things about your boyfriend, Jason. It took you no time at all to find about his nightly activities and everything about his family. But on the other hand, you can't seem to understand him at all.

You've tried not to ask him about certain things because based on hints from his family, he's had some bad shit happen in his life. More than he's been comfortable telling you so far in your relationship.

However, the more questions you don't ask, the more that seem to pop up.

You haven't asked him why sometimes he flinches away when you touch him but other times he leans in.

You haven't asked him why his hands make fists when you're trying to sleep at night.

You haven't asked him about the scar along his chest or his aversion to certain foods.

All because you're too scared to make him uncomfortable, or maybe because you don't know if you could stomach it.

You're laying bed and waiting for him to come out of the bathroom. Somehow, you take less time getting ready for bed than he does. You suspect it's because he needs a couple minutes to process everything that happened during the day.

As usual you have a million thoughts running through you're head all at the same time. 99% of them are about him.

When he finally comes into your shared bedroom and gets comfortable in bed, you're debating whether or not to talk to him about some of the things you can't get out of your mind.

You decide against it. The last thing you want to do is make him uncomfortable or bring up any bad memories that might affect his ability to sleep through the night.

He can obviously sense your unease, you don't hide it very well.

"What's wrong?" His raspy voice cuts through your thoughts.

"Nothing, sweetheart." You try to play it off.

"Uh huh." He says blankly.

"I'm just thinking about things, is that a crime?"

"Depends on what they are." He pulls you closer to him and wraps his arms around you.

"Nothing bad."

"Hmm."

"What?"

"If someone's bothering you, you should tell me."

"Why is that?"

"Well I have an ability of getting rid of people."

"Oh my God, Jason, you can't joke about that." You look at him in amused shock.

"Who says it's a joke?" He asks, face completely serious.

"Okay no killing people on my behalf, pretty please." You chuckle and he copies. "I'm just trying to figure you out more."

"Why?"

"Cuz I want to know more about you?"

"Like what"

"Right now I want what's bothering you, and know what you want." You pull away from him in order to sit up a little bit.

"I don't want anything at the moment."

"Yes you do. If you didn't want anything your fists wouldn't be clenched and your eyes wouldn't have that look. Like you want to say something but can't."

"You really want to know?" He asks.

"Yeah I really do." You immediately reply.

"A couple months ago while we were watching a movie on the couch, you played with my hair and it was very comforting. And the best sleep I've ever had." He rambles off as quickly as possible.

"That's it? I've been driving myself crazy trying to think of explanations and you're telling me you just want me to play with your hair." You question him in disbelief. It's been months of overthinking thoughts and random mind rampages for something you haven't even noticed you were doing.

"I didn't know how to say it." He shrugs, not looking into your eyes. "It sounds childish."

"No it doesn't. Everyone has different ideas of perfect comfort and I happen to agree with yours. Jason, if you want something from me all you have to do is ask."

You lean over to give him a quick, sweet kiss.

"I'm not used to that."

"Well you better get started."

"Fine, would you play with hair so I can go to sleep, Angel?"

"Only because you asked so nicely."

It takes a second for you both to get rearranged so it's comfortable. You're now laying on your back with Jason half on his side, half on top of you with his head on your chest.

It's almost amusing how quickly he falls asleep but above all else you feel a sense of pride at the fact that you're the one giving him this feeling.

He said this was comforting. He said this was the best sleep he's ever had.

And you're the reason he's having these things.

You stay up longer than you probably should have. This time the thoughts running through your head aren't worrying or overwhelming.

They make you happy. Happy enough to fall into a very sound sleep.

You wake up to coffee on your nightstand and a missing Jason.

"Jason." You call out and he quickly comes running.

When he walks in the room, you immediately begin questioning him.

"What is this?" You ask with an ounce of suspicion. You're worried it's a repayment of some sort.

"It's coffee. A hot caffeinated drink."

"Why?"

"Because you like it and it makes you irritable for far less time in the morning."

"Jason you don't have to do things for me just because I did something for you."

"Yes I do. Because words won't let me explain how grateful I am for you."

"Since when are you so sappy?"

He sits on the bed next to you.

"Don't be mean to me right now, I'll take it away."

"Fine. Continue your speech."

"I know it's a small thing for you but I haven't felt comfort like you give me in a very long time. Maybe even ever. And I need you to know that."

"I can't tell you how happy I am to give that to you."

The next thing you know, you both have giant grins on your faces and you're both happier than ever before.

- send requests!!

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insidekatmind · 5 months ago

Text

Confession-Alejandro Balde

Wearning:+18,sweet smut.

It was late, and the rain was falling gently on the streets of Barcelona as you clutched your phone in your hands, your heart shattered by yet another lie. The proof was right there, in front of your eyes messages, photos, details that left no room for doubt. He had cheated on you. Again.

You felt foolish, exhausted, drained. How much longer were you going to stay in this toxic relationship, hoping he would change?

A knock at the door made you jump. You already knew who it was.

Alejandro stood there, his hoodie slightly damp from the rain, his eyes burning with restrained anger. He looked at you for a moment, then, without saying a word, pulled you into his arms.

"You don’t deserve this," he whispered against your hair.

You broke down in tears, letting all the pain flow out, just like the rain streaming down the windows. Alejandro didn’t let go, not even for a second.

"I don’t understand why I keep hurting myself," you murmured, your voice breaking.

He pulled back slightly, cupping your face in his hands. His dark eyes were intense, filled with a feeling you couldn’t quite decipher yet.

"Because you love him," he answered, a trace of bitterness in his tone. "But he doesn’t know what it means to love you."

Your breath hitched for a moment."Ale…"

He shook his head, taking a deep breath as if he was about to say something he had been holding back for too long.

"I’ve seen you suffer too many times, Y/N. I’ve watched you forgive, hope, stay when you should have walked away." He paused, his thumb gently brushing against your cheek. "And I realized I can’t stand by and watch anymore."

Your heart pounded wildly.

"I love you," he confessed, his voice trembling but sure. "And I have for a long time. I just always thought you deserved someone better than me… but then I realized that anyone would be better than him."

He gave you space to pull away, to refuse, to deny. But you didn’t. Because in that moment, with his hands holding you as if you were the most precious thing in the world, you felt a truth you had never dared to face before:

Alejandro was everything your ex wasn’t.

And maybe, he was exactly what you had needed all along.

You look at him for a while and then finally kiss him. He responded almost immediately, kissing you back hungrily, as if he could not believe that this was finally happening. His hands roamed across your body possessively, pulling you closer to him as if he wanted to fuse your body into his.

You straddled him without breaking the kiss. He groaned, his hands gripping your waist as you straddled him, his body reacting to you. He deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth passionately. Alejandro shifted you a little so you were fully sitting on his lap, and could feel his excitement growing as your body pressed against him.

You moaned and clung to him as you kissed him more passionately. He broke the kiss for a moment, his breathing ragged, and looked at you with dark eyes filled with desire.

"You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this," he murmured, his hands roaming across your back, as if trying to memorize every curve of your body. Without warning, he flipped you both over so you were now laying on the couch, with him hovering over you.

You look at him smiling and you let him fall on your body hugging him while you caressed his hair and every now and then you gave him sweet kisses on his face. He buried his face in your neck, nuzzling and breathing you in. His body was heavy on you, but it felt safe and comforting.

His hands roamed your body, sliding underneath your shirt and caressing your bare back. He let out a low moan, as if just the touch of your skin was enough to make him lose his mind. "You drive me crazy, you know that?" He murmured, his lips brushing against your collarbone. He began to kiss and lick your skin, his teeth grazing along your neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. His hands continued to roam over your body, as if he couldn’t get enough of you.

You could feel his arousal, hard and wanting, pressed against you, and it made you shiver with anticipation. You pulled him closer, your fingers tangling in his hair. He responded immediately to your touch, his body pressing against yours even more. His hands were everywhere, as his mouth latched onto your skin, finding every sensitive spot that made you arch your back, and moan softly.

He nipped at your earlobe and then whispered in your ear, his voice deep and sensual, “I want you. I want you so bad it’s driving me crazy.” You shivered at his words, feeling a new wave of desire wash over you. You pulled him closer, kissing him hard and needy, as your body strained against his. He groaned, his hands sliding further down your body, exploring every curve as if marking you as his territory.

You wrapped your legs around his hips, wanting him even closer, wanting to feel every inch of his body against yours. He responded in kind, his own hips rolling against you as he kissed you deeply, his tongue tangling with yours.

Alejandro gently and delicately takes off your leggings and kisses your legs softly and then takes off your panties, he moans at the sight. He looked at you, his eyes dark and heavy with desire. He ran his hands over your thighs, his touch a mix of gentle and possessive.

"You are so magnificent," he murmured, his voice hoarse, as he planted kisses along your legs, his lips sending shivers of pleasure through your body. Alejandro slowly made his way up, his hands sliding up to your hips, as he pulled you closer. He looked up at you, his eyes locking with yours, filled with an intensity you had never seen before.

He quickly takes off his sweatpants and boxers and slowly enters you. His hands gripped your thighs as he slowly entered you, his body trembling with desire. He let out a low moan, his eyes locked on yours, as if he couldn't look away.

He took a moment, his body completely enveloped in you, and you could feel his heart pounding against your chest. He leaned in, kissing you deeply, his body pressed against yours as if he couldn't get close enough. “You feel so good,” he says softly as he pushed his cock into you slowly and sensually.

You moan softly feeling his gentle, slow and sensual thrusts. Alejandro watched your face closely, his gaze taking in every single expression you made. He loved the way your body responded to his touch, the way your moans made him shiver.

His hands continued to roam your body, finding all the spots that made you arch your back, and squirm in pleasure. He was taking his time, wanting to make you feel every single moment, every single sensation.

“Ale” you moan softly as you still feel his slow and sensual thrusts. “faster” you murmur but Alejandro shakes his head. “There's time baby, I want to make you feel every inch of me inside you” he whispers softly kissing your forehead.

“You’re so beautiful, so perfect,” he murmured between kisses, his hands roaming over your body lovingly. “I’ve wanted this for so long, I can barely believe it’s real.”

Your heart beats fast at his words and you smile softly and then moan as you feel Alejandro slowly and sensually hitting your g-spot. “There it is,” he whispered, his eyes gleaming as he noted your reaction. He knew he had found the perfect spot, and he began to move himself even more to touch it more softly, slowly making you lose your mind.

“Keep your eyes on me,” he commanded. “Don’t look away.” You obeyed, your gaze locked with his as he continued to move inside you. His eyes were dark and intense, filled with so much emotion it took your breath away.

He bent down to kiss you again, his mouth devouring yours possessively. His movements became even more deliberate, as if he was trying to drive you crazy. Every inch of your body was on fire, ignited by the passion of his touch. Alejandro picked up the pace a little, his thrusts becoming deeper and more erratic, but he was still in control, still keeping the rhythm slow and sensual. He could feel your body reacting to his touch, your breathing ragged and heavy.

Alejandro watched you closely, his eyes never leaving yours, as if he was trying to burn this moment into his memory. His hands were everywhere, roaming your skin, touching every part of you as if he couldn’t get enough.

You moan softly, kissing his jaw lovingly. "Ale I'm coming" you whisper. “Let go, baby,” he whispered back. “I’ve got you, I’m here.”His hands gripped your thighs a little tighter, as he continued to move inside you, driving you closer and closer to the edge.

“Come for me,” he said, his voice low and sensual. “Come for me and I’ll catch you.” At his words you moan softly and come. With two more thrusts he pulls out and comes on your belly sighing loudly.

He groans at the sight. Alejandro reaches out and takes the rag that was on the furniture and removes his cum from you and then throws the rag on the floor. Alejandro collapsed beside you, his body glistening with sweat, his breathing ragged. He pulled you closer, holding you tightly in his arms. “That was… incredible,” he murmured, his voice hoarse and filled with emotion.

Alejandro looked at you, his eyes filled with a mixture of awe and satisfaction. He gently kissed your forehead, his fingers tracing a path across your skin as if he couldn’t get enough of you. You smile sweetly and hug him.

He held you close, relishing the feeling of you in his arms. He gently kissed the top of your head, inhaling the scent of your hair. "I can't believe that just happened," he murmured, still sounding slightly breathless. "I've dreamed of this for so long, and it was even better than I could have imagined.”

Alejandro hugged you tighter, feeling a wave of protectiveness wash over him. He never wanted to let you go. He wanted to keep you safe, keep you happy, and keep you close. His hand gently caressed your back, feeling the soft curves of your body. "I love you," he whispered, his voice filled with sincerity. "I love you so much, and I always have. I just never thought it could be real."

Alejandro pulled back slightly, so he could look into your eyes. He wanted to make sure you knew how serious he was, how honest his words were. He cradled your face in his hands and searched your gaze, his expression filled with a mixture of vulnerable and intensity.

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archrries · 6 months ago

Text

Asking my mom about her disability so I can give you all pretty accurate information on Viktor o7

She has post-polio, and has a leg brace like he does. So for all your "could Viktor do this?" questions, I go to my mother ♡ He most likely has a combination of things, but definitely seems to have post-polio. So yes, other things could stop him from these activities but overall, this is a swing at how it works for this aspect of his life.

What I know as of now about Viktor, most likely,

- could skateboard

- could drive a motorcycle

- drive a car (has to use good leg to press on pedals)

- does NOT sleep with the leg brace on

- dead silent when he takes the brace off

- my mom played sports that involved throwing more than running (softball (pitcher), volleyball, she did try out for football at some point but the coach didnt want a girl trying out)

- sigh...yes...he can do the deed without breaking a fucking hip. He isnt made of glass. Im not going into detail on this one thanks

- roller skating

- shoot a gun (idk why this is debated)(also though i will say that for some guns, the kick is too strong. The entire body is effected by polio, its just most severe in some parts like his leg)

- ice skating!!! I know this is a hot debate, she has gone ice skating

Ill ask my mom about more if you have any specific questions 👍

More info edit:

My Mom's leg has unfortunately gotten worse, which is nothing new considering it's been worsening her entire life, but this means her heel bone is now digging through the skin and muscle of her foot. She will be getting surgery to shave the bone down and hopefully that will help her to walk better on it again once it's healed. Take that as you will in reference to Viktor and his worsening condition. She has told me several times that she is in a lot of pain, which she typically does not vocalize.

- can carry kids around for short periods of time (she babysits my nieces and nephews constantly)

- can HAVE kids for that matter (for all your trans and mpreg needs 😭) though this certainly was a toll on her body even back when she was younger

- maybe this is just specific to her but every single time something gets mentioned that could even POSSIBLY be polio, she gets worried. I mentioned my little cousin being sick and suddenly not able to walk on her own (she is doing okay right now, no pain) and she instantly asked if she had drunk any dirty water (where polio is most commonly found) She freaked when my sister was born with a little wonky leg even though it's 1) not passed down from mother to child and 2) fixed itswlf within a month. All my siblings were immediately vaccinated for polio as well as other major things, though she gets very nervous about new vaccines because she got it from the polio vaccine which contained the live virus at the time (no longer used) She did not want me vaccinated for covid or HPV because of this worry.

- When she gets sick, she gets sick BAD. Last time she was sick, she was in a fever state for three days and doesn't remember a single thing.

- Fear of death, judgement, or being arrested has never really affected her. She has a DNR (which I'm not a fan of, but I understand if shit goes wrong, she doesn't want to be resuscitated just to experience way more pain), she's always lived on the crazy side but stopped once she had kids (I mean used to ride her motorcycle like she was trying to speed run death), always tells me I need to stop caring what people think cause she stopped giving a shit early on with all the bullying, she has in fact pulled a gun on a man for hurting me and the ONLY reason I think she didn't pull that trigger is because there was someone else in the way, she actively encourages cops, security, etc to try and stop her when it comes to the safety of her family (she most recently started shit with staff because my nephew broke his arm at school and no one will tell her what happened)

- She handles her farm pretty much alone. Chickens, ducks, goats, sheep, rabbits, turkeys. And I'm so sorry to say they are both long term and short stay animals....We only name pets. Anything without a name is sent to freezer camp 😭

- Which leads me to tell you she is a butcher, and has always hung up meat and quartered it herself. She also hunts, so she does it with venison too. Plus we try and use as much of the animal as possible as to respect it. So that's butchering, tanning hides, cleaning off bones, making twine.

- She loves to lie about what happened to her leg. Her favorite for kids is that she's a cyborg or a transformer. Most adults just assume military and she doesn't tell them otherwise. She used to tell ppl for a while that she jumped out of one of the towers on 9/11.......💀 crazy since she was born and raised in New York

#viktor arcane #jayce x viktor #viktor league of legends #viktor fanart #viktor lol #lgbtq #lgbt #fanart #jayvik #post polio #polio #polio vaccine #arcane #jinx #jayce talis #arcane jayce #vi arcane #heimerdinger

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on-a-lucky-tide · 8 months ago

Note

Want my prompt to shake the table a bit, see a pairing that I almost never see alone:

Ghost/Gaz. Something sweet, something feral; a nice mixture. Your call but I trust your judgment.

Gaz tries to give Ghost what he asked for but it's too much.

cw: failed scene, Dom drop.

"You sick bastard, by the time I'm done with you, you'll be wanting to tell me everything," Gaz murmured close to Ghost's mask, circling the end of the riding crop around one pale nipple. It pebbled eagerly, a flurry of goosebumps running over Ghost's shoulders as he watched Gaz sneer. "I'll need a gag to shut you up."

Ghost hummed low in his throat and spread his knees out, testing the rope cuffs securing his wrists behind the chair. His cock strained against the confines of his keks and he wanted nothing more than to feed it between those pretty lips. Gaz was in control through, which set Ghost's fuckin' blood on fire.

The first strike stung. A firm lash across his chest that caught a nipple. His head fell back and he grunted, eyes fluttering as the welt prickled and throbbed in the aftermath. A second fell right next to the first, precise, measured, and Ghost's mouth fell open under the mask; the third punched a low groan, his shoulders rolling, wrists straining against the rope.

There wasn't a fourth.

Ghost looked up, examining Gaz through lidded eyes. It took him a moment to surface through the fog in his head created by sting of the riding crop, but when he did, the pinched expression on Gaz's face set his teeth on edge.

"Sir," Ghost tried. Nothing. He kicked his boot against the floor to get Gaz's attention before the pit opening in his head swallowed him whole. "Kyle, colour."

Gaz blinked. "Huh?" He looked washed out, hollow, his eyes distant. The crop dangled in one hand, his shoulders hunched.

"'m red, we're done," Ghost said.

"Shit, was it... Did I do something wrong? Si, I'm sorry, I..."

"Ya gonna untie me before I pop my bleedin' thumbs to get out?"

"Don't do that, you crazy arsehole," Gaz cast the crop aside and ran around the back, picking the knot open until it fell away. Ghost heard him hiss, and then in the next moment his fingertips were stroking the friction burns around Ghost's wrists. "Fuck, shit, look at... I'll get the... I'll get the stuff."

Ghost watched him scuttle over to the chest of drawers at the far wall and find the Savlon. It was a nice chest of drawers. Not like the IKEA shit in Ghost's gaff, but one of those oak numbers from Oak Furnitureland. Ghost had half expected Gaz to still live at home, to have to shove a t-shirt in his mouth as they fumbled in his childhood bed with Thomas the Tank Engine bedsheets.

But, like in many things, Gaz had surprised him. The flat was tidy. Nice little bolt hole in northern Kent where he was just close enough to visit his parents in London, but just far outside enough to be able to afford to eat when he was on leave. Ghost didn't miss the sergeant's salary.

Gaz approached tentatively. "Give me your wrists," he said, trying for the commanding tone he has used in the scene, that he used so effortlessly in the field, but missing the mark. His voice wavered and that pinched expression was still on his face.

Ghost patted two hands on his lap, drawing his knees together enough to create a platform, and then opened his hands. Gaz didn't need a second invite and sank gratefully onto Ghost's thighs, his own either side. "Wrists," he insisted, and Ghost lifted them up for inspection.

"Gonna tell me what happened?"

"It's nothing," Gaz said, squeezing out a little bit of cream onto his forefinger and then carefully rubbing it against the burn. Ghost knew this part of it was important. Gaz cared. He cared a lot, fuck knows why. Ghost didn't pretend to understand how his mind worked; Gaz was good, you know, proper, and rather than try to dissect that and risk driving it off, Ghost has decided to throw himself heart first into earning it.

"We won't be goin' anywhere 'til you do."

"Oh yeah? What if I kick you out on your arse?"

"I'd climb back in the window."

'We're on the seventh floor."

"Yeah."

"Fuckin' nutcase," Gaz breathed through a chuckle, and then moved to Ghost's second wrist. "I'm sorry, alright? I'm sorry I couldn't... I couldn't give you what you needed."

"What did I need?"

Gaz fixed him with a quizzical look and Ghost gazed back placidly. "You needed me to beat you, right? Like I would in a fucking interrogation." There it was. Ghost could feel the sharp edge of it, like running his fingers over a soft blanket and finding a razor sticking out of it; the hurt biting into Gaz's skin.

"Ya didn't hurt me, Kyle."

"Yeah? Wos all this then?" He gestured at Ghost's wrists, his chest, pressing his lips together.

"Pleasure."

"What?"

"Told ya when we started. I like it, makes me feel good, makes the next part when I fuck ya even better."

Gaz got that sheepish look on his face and Ghost knew if he kissed him, Gaz's cheeks would be warm beneath his lips.

"I'm sorry, it... It was too much like... Look, I can do better next time, I can get my head on right, and.."

Ghost hummed, hooking a thumb beneath his bally to pull it off. Gaz's pupils blew wide. Ghost liked that, the way Gaz looked at his unmasked face; with want and affection. He took Gaz's chin and pulled him down for a kiss, teasing his lips open, keeping it gentle. He scooped a hand behind Kyle's arse and scooted him forward until the warm seat of his sweats sat over the hard bulge in the front of Ghost's belted combats. He needed to feel; to be grounded in the reality, rather than the fiction he'd created in his head, of what he'd done.

Gaz moaned softly into Ghost's mouth, a muffled 'Simon' tried to slip out, his hands splaying on Ghost's chest, trapping the cold tin of the tube against his skin. When Ghost drew away, still with one arm to keep Gaz against him, he tilted his head. "There are plenty more ways ya can make me beg."

Gaz rolled his lower lip between his teeth, one eyebrow raised. "I thought you liked the pain..."

"I like to be pushed to my limits. Pain's the easiest way."

"Yeah, looks it..." Gaz said dryly, eyeing the reddened stripes on Ghost's pale chest. He stroked down the edge of one with his fingertips, grimacing. "Alright. What are the other ways? Not gonna lie, Si. It wasn't doing much for me."

"Ya could shove a big vibrator up my arse and edge me 'til I cry."

Gaz choked on air. "What?"

He liked it though. The sound of it. His hips gave a little twitch, the first squirm of arousal.

"Ya could make me do push ups until I can't, then punish me by not letting me cum 'til I beg you."

Oh, he really liked that. Ghost's eyes dropped to Gaz's lap, head tilted, to admire the curve of his cock pushing through the grey flannel. "What else?" Gaz asked, his voice low.

"I could warm ya prick while ya watch footie. Cuff me so I can't touch myself, maybe put a remote control vibrator in my arse."

Gaz licked his lips. "Yeah, I... I like these ones better."

"Soft touch."

"Ah, fuck off, mate. I..." Gaz sighed, running a hand through Ghost's scruff of blonde hair. "I want to make you feel good, I do, but the whip just feels like I'm bringing work into our bedroom. Makes me feel sick, you know?"

"Thanks," Ghost said, "for tellin' me. I wouldn't have been as brave."

Gaz studied him for a long moment, his thumb brushing over the faint lines at the corner of his eye, then down the knife scarring over his jaw and lip. "You sure it's not the pain you want, Si? Don't lie to me."

Ghost considered his answer carefully. "I like it. But I don't need it. I need you," he said. "No point in it if ya in your head when we fuck after. I ain't selfish, Kyle. Not with shit like this."

He was selfish in other ways. Hoarding Kyle's time on leave for one. He knew, realistically, he had to go and see his mum tomorrow or face her wrath, but that didn't stop Ghost resenting the absence slightly. Their time was precious, finite. Ghost didn't like sharing.

His answer appeared to appease Gaz, who sat back to smooth some more Savlon over the welts on Ghost's chest. While he worked, Ghost's hands wandered, the one behind slid into the crease between his legs to find the heavy, warm weight of his balls, while the other caressed over his abdomen, backs of his fingers playing in the soft trail of hair down the middle. "Oi, let me finish before you get handsy," Gaz grunted.

"No." Ghost went to Gaz's chest and thumbed over a nipple, savouring the gasp like the first sip of bourbon after a long op. It didn't take him long to get Gaz hard, ignoring his protests when he stood and carried him to the bed, pushing those sweats off to the floor so he was gloriously naked against his crisp sheets.

Ghost sat up, spreading his knees open between Gaz's legs, leaving him on display to be admired. Gaz knew how good looking he was, with his sculpted arms above his head, his body chiselled from bloody marble, his Hollywood good looks, his perfect cock arched up from groomed pubic hair, and the perfect furl of his hole. He writhed, twitching his hips up in needy little thrusts as he basked in his arousal. "Hng, Si," Gaz moaned, lower lip rolling between his teeth.

"You fockin' tease," Ghost growled, undoing his belt with one hand and whipping it out as he popped his fly with the other. He got his keks halfway down his thighs before he leaned forward and sank into a kiss, hands stroking up Gaz's biceps to lace their fingers together.

They'd fuck all afternoon, like they always did in the first few days of leave; hot, heavy, frantic, sometimes tender. They would emerge later to eat and play FIFA on Gaz's PS4 with some beers, before falling asleep in a heap on the sofa. In the morning, it would be the gym, then some bedroom cardio, before mooching about a local town, back to the bedroom, rinse and repeat. Boring for some, maybe. It was the first time in Ghost's life he'd ever looked forward to his annual leave.

#kyle gaz garrick #simon ghost riley #gazghost #ghostgaz #cod #call of duty #neither nik nor price in this one who am I?

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justagirlthatlovedtoread · 5 months ago

Text

The morning after

Niall was lying next to you in your bed, his arms wrapped around your waist as his nose was buried in the crook of your neck. He was breathing in your scent, his body pressed against yours. Niall couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt in his chest as you acted as if the night before never happened. He knew that you and him had had a one-night stand, and it had meant so much to him, but here you were, pretending you didn't remember a thing. Niall tried to hide his emotions but he was hurting.

"You ok?" You say, as you look around to face him, and swallow the lump in your throat when you realize his face is inches away from yours.

Niall's heart skipped a beat as you asked if he was okay. He tried to keep his composure, nodding his head slightly as he looked into your eyes. It was difficult for him to hide how he was feeling. He wanted to tell you how much he cared, how the night you spent together was so much more than a one-night stand for him. But instead, he just said, "Yeah, I'm fine."

Niall tightened his arms around your waist slightly, his body pressed closer to yours. He could feel your breath on his skin and it was driving him crazy. He wanted to pull you in even closer, to feel every inch of you against him, but he restrained himself, knowing that you were pretending not to remember the night before. His heart ached as he looked into your eyes, desperately fighting the urge to tell you how he truly felt.

He could hear your heart beat slightly faster as he held you close, his body responding to your proximity. Niall could feel the heat radiating off of you, and he couldn't help but notice the way your eyes darted around, avoiding his gaze. He knew that you were avoiding the memories of the night before, but he couldn't help but wonder why. Was it just a one-night stand to you? Or was it more? Niall was desperate to know, but he didn't want to push you to remember something you clearly wanted to forget.

Niall couldn't take it any longer. He needed to know the truth. He took a deep breath and spoke up, his voice betraying his vulnerability, "Do you... do you remember last night at all?" The question hung in the air between you, his arms still around your waist, his body still pressed against yours.

"I remember.....I remember a little" you hesitantly say.

Niall's heart skipped a beat as you admitted that you remembered at least a little. He wasn't about to take that as an answer, though. He needed more. "A little?" he asked, his voice soft. "What do you remember, exactly?"

"What do you remember?", emphasizing the 'you'.

Niall's heart skipped a beat at your question. He knew exactly what he remembered. Every single detail. The way your body felt against his, the way your lips tasted, the way you looked at him, the way you gasped his name. He remembered it all.

Niall swallowed, his voice slightly choked, as he replied, "I remember everything."

He studied your face closely, trying to gauge your reaction. He could see the mixture of emotions in your eyes, the guilt and the confusion. Niall's heart ached as he watched you struggle to respond. He wanted to reach out and touch your face, to reassure you that it was okay, but he held himself back. He needed to know the truth. He needed to know how you felt about what happened between you last night.

You sigh. "Niall, I'm so so sorry" you said, putting your face in your hands.

Niall's heart sank as you apologized, your hand covering your face. He could see the guilt and shame on your face, and he didn't understand why. Niall reached out and gently took your hand from your face, intertwining his fingers with yours.

"Don't apologize," he said softly, his voice filled with concern. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

He squeezed your hand gently, trying to convey his support and understanding. He could see that you were feeling torn, and he hated seeing you like this. Niall wanted to reassure you, to tell you that what happened between you last night was not something to be sorry for. It was something he'd been hoping for for so long.

"Can I ask you something?" He asks

"yes" you say as you looked down. Your voice hardly audible.

Niall took a deep breath, his thumb tracing circles on the back of your hand with his left hand, and raising his right hand to lift up your chin gently.

He carefully chose his words. "Why are you apologizing?"

He wanted to know why you were feeling guilty, why you were trying to pretend it didn't happen. Niall needed to hear the truth from your lips.

"Because this changes absolutely everything"

Niall's heart skipped a beat at your words. He could hear the fear and uncertainty in your voice, and he knew that you were right. What happened between you last night had changed things. But Niall didn't see it as a bad thing. He saw it as an opportunity, a chance for something more.

"Why does it have to change everything?" he asked quietly, his thumb still tracing soothing circles on the back of your hand.

"Because... because we're friends"

Niall's heart ached as you reminded him that you were friends, and yet he couldn't help but feel a flicker of hope. Your breath hitched, and Niall's eyes were locked on your lips. He was so close, so close that he could feel the heat radiating off of your skin, and the urge to be even closer was getting too strong to ignore.

"So?" he whispered, his voice laced with a hint of desperation.

His eyes flickered between your eyes and your lips, waiting for any indication that you wanted to stop, but when he didn't notice any signs, He decided he couldn't resist any longer.

So with a mixture of courage and desperation, Niall closed the distance between you and pressed his lips against yours. It wasn't a rough or passionate kiss like the one the night before. This one was tender, pleading, as if he was silently begging you to reciprocate.

Niall's heart hammered in his chest as you kissed back, his lips gently moving against yours. The feeling of your lips touching his sent electricity shooting through his body, and Niall couldn't help but savor the sensation. He pulled you in closer, their bodies molding together, and he felt your breath hitch again as he deepened the kiss.

It was a mix of tenderness and hunger, his tongue brushing against your bottom lip as he explored your mouth, his feelings pouring into every move. Niall's hand slid up from your waist to cradle your cheek, his thumb caressing your skin gently as he tried to convey everything he was feeling through the kiss.

Finally, after what both felt like an eternity and not nearly long enough, Niall pulled away slightly, his forehead resting against yours, his breath coming in shallow gasps. He could feel your pulse racing, echoing the beating of his own heart. Niall's thumb continued to stroke your cheek, his eyes searching your face for any sign of how you were feeling.

"I don't regret what happened last night," he said quietly, his voice gruff with emotion. "I don't want things to change. But I want... I want more. I want you." Niall's voice was laced with vulnerability and desperation as he confessed how he truly felt about you.

"Niall...I-"

Niall's heart hammered in his chest as he waited for you to respond. He could feel the tension between you, the weight of his confession hanging in the air. Niall's eyes searched your face, silently pleading for you to say something, anything to give him some idea of how you were feeling.

"Please," he whispered, his hand trailing from your cheek, down to your neck and back up again, "tell me what you're thinking."

"Um, I...What do we do about this? Looking into his eyes.

Niall's heart skipped a beat as you whispered, and he nodded his head slightly as if to say he understood what you meant.

"I don't know about you, I mean....I could take a guess....and I know I've said it a handful of times already, but I want you" he breathed, his voice hoarse with emotion, "so badly. I've been wanting you for so long. Last night... It was everything I've ever wanted, and I don't want it to be just a one-time thing."

"But you're my bestfriend, and you- i- you're my brothers best friend too. What if we have a nasty break up and you guys never speak again, what if-"

Niall could sense the fear and doubt in your voice as you spoke, and he realized that you were expressing the same concerns that were gnawing at the back of his mind. He took a deep breath, his eyes locked on yours.

"I know," he nodded, his hand gently stroking your cheek, "there's a lot at risk here. But I've thought about this for a long time, and the thought of losing the chance to be with you, it's... it's scarier than the thought of losing Harry's friendship."

"I believe in us," he continued, his voice filled with conviction. "I believe that what we have is worth taking the risk. I don't want to keep pretending that I only see you as a friend, because that's not true. You're so much more than that to me, and I'm willing to fight for what we could have together."

"And as for Harry," he continued, a small hint of a smile playing at the corner of his lips, "I think he'd probably be pretty ecstatic if we became a couple. He's always joked about us being together."

"He has? He's my brother...why I didn't know this?" You say as you giggle lightly, facepalming.

Niall chuckled softly at your surprise, his thumb continuing to lightly caress your cheek.

"Yeah, he's been making little comments for months now," he said, his eyes gleaming with amusement. "He's always saying things like 'You two should just get together already' and 'You're both so obvious, it's adorable.'"

"Oh my gosh" you say with a laugh, as It suddenly all comes to you.

Niall's smile grew as he saw the realization dawn on your face. "I don't think Harry's gonna mind," he said, his voice filled with a touch of playful confidence. "In fact, he might even be happy for us. And who knows, maybe he'll stop with the jokes about us being a couple once we actually are one."

"But more importantly," Niall said, his voice growing serious again, "I want to make sure you're on the same page as me. Do you... do you want this as much as I do? Do you want to be with me, to be more than friends? Because if you don't, I won't push. The last thing I wanna do is pressure you into something you're not comfortable with."

Niall's heart beat faster as he waited for your response, his thumb still tracing soothing circles on your skin. He was trying to keep a calm exterior, but the fear of rejection was gnawing at him from the inside. He wanted this, he wanted you so badly, but he needed to know if you felt the same way.

You smile at him. "You're always such a gentleman, you know that right?"

Niall chuckled softly, a mixture of bashfulness and surprise at your unexpected compliment. He couldn't help but feel a wave of warmth wash over him at your words.

"Ah, well," he said, a sheepish smile on his face, "I try to be. Especially with you."

You both laugh with each other a couple of seconds. It's always been like that between the two of you. So easy and free flowing.

He took a moment to savor the feeling of being close to you, his hand still cradling your cheek, his thumb gently caressing your skin. The tension between you had shifted, the air was charged with a different kind of energy. Niall couldn't help but feel relieved.

"So," he continued, his voice filled with a hint of hopeful anticipation, "you didn't answer my question. Do you, uh, do you..." Niall's voice trailed off, his heart hammering in his chest as he waited for your response.

"Yes- yes, I do," you say after pausing for a second.

Niall's eyes widened and his heart soared at your words, a sense of pure joy flooding through him. He felt as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He couldn't help but smile widely, his eyes sparkling with happiness.

"You do?" he asked, his voice filled with a mix of disbelief and elation. "You want to be with me?"

"Yes Niall, I'd love to be with you"

His smile grew even wider as the confirmation of your words sank in. He picked you up and spun you around you around, placing you back in the ground you down a few moments later and wrapping his arms around you, with body pressing against yours. A rush of emotions washed over him, his heart swelling with a mixture of relief and happiness.

"Thank God," he breathed, his voice filled with a mix of laughter and emotion. "I was so worried you would say no."

He buried his face in the crook of your neck, his arms holding you tight as he savored the feeling of having you in his embrace. The relief and joy coursing through him were overwhelming, and he couldn't help but let out a small laugh as he spoke.

"I thought I'd have to do a much harder pitch to convince you," he teased, his breath warm against your skin.

"You already had me long before now, you knew that"

Niall's heart skipped a beat as you confessed that you'd been his all along, a mix of disbelief, relief, and happiness filling him. His arms tightened around you, his face still buried in the crook of your neck.

"I had a feeling," he murmured, his voice laced with a mix of vulnerability and tenderness. "But I was afraid that I was just imagining things, that I was the only one feeling this strongly."

"you're such a sap!" You laughed.

Niall chuckled at your teasing, pulling back slightly to look into your eyes. A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips as he feigned offense.

"Excuse me," he said, pretending to be wounded, "I'll have you know that I'm simply a hopeless romantic."

He gently poked your side, a playful glint in his eye as he spoke, "I can't help it if I'm a sap, especially when it comes to you. You bring out the romantic in me, you know that?"

He continued to hold you in his arms in silence for a few minutes, his hands gently running up and down your back in soothing circles. Niall's heart was overflowing with a mix of emotions, and he couldn't resist stealing a few more moments to enjoy the feeling of having you close.

"But if I'm a sap, what does that make you? Since you've secretly liked me, too."

He leaned back slightly, a playful glimmer in his eyes, as he waited for your response. Niall couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction at the fact that he wasn't the only one who had secretly harbored feelings for the other.

"Mmmm" you giggle before saying something else.

"it looks like we have some explaining to do" stroking the top of his head, through his wavy brunette hair.

Niall chuckled at your abrupt change in subject, his arms still wrapped around your waist, his body still pressed against yours. He understood where your mind was headed, and he couldn't help but feel a mixture of anticipation and nervousness at the thought of discussing this with Harry.

"Yeah, I think you're right," he agreed, a touch of amusement in his voice. "I guess we can't keep this a secret from your brother for much longer."

"He's going to enjoy this isn't he?"

Niall let out a small laugh, nodding in agreement. "Oh, absolutely," he said, a mix of resignation and humor lacing his voice.

"I have no doubt that Harry will be absolutely thrilled. He already had suspicions about us, now he's gonna have confirmation, and he'll probably take great pleasure in being right all along.

"Just prepare yourself for all the 'I told you so's' and the endless teasing," Niall added, a hint of amusement in his voice. "He'll be really happy for us, too" he says, giving you reassurance without even knowing it.

Niall is such a great guy.

He pulled back slightly, giving you a reassuring smile, his hands still resting on your waist. "He just needs to get his teasing out of his system first. Then, hopefully, we can all move on and enjoy this new stage in our relationship."

"We're in this together, and we'll face whatever comes our way, with Harry's jokes and all. But before we go down stairs and tell him....." He says, stepping impossibly closer.

"I really want to kiss you again" he says, looking down at you, and stroking your hips.

His eyes flickered down to your lips, his gaze filled with a mix of playfulness and desire. He could feel the tension between you, a combination of the conversation you'd just had and the lingering aftermath of your recent make-out session.

"Just one more kiss before we face Harry," he murmured, his voice laced with a hint of pleading.

"One more kiss" you whispered, smiling.

Niall's smile broadened at your agreement, his heart skipping a beat as he realized he could kiss you once more. He pulled you closer, his arms wrapping around you tightly as he gently leaned in, his lips brushing against yours.

The kiss started off soft and gentle, a tender connection between the two of you. But slowly, the passion flared up again as Niall deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping into your mouth, his body pressing against yours.

He couldn't help but lose himself in the moment, the feel of your body against his, the taste of your lips, overwhelming all his senses. Niall's hands roamed across your back, his fingers tracing small circles on your skin, trying to pull you even closer, as if he couldn't get enough of you.

After a few minutes, Niall reluctantly pulled back, his breath coming in short gasps, his chest rising and falling with the rapid beat of his heart. He rested his forehead against yours, his eyes locking with yours, a mixture of desire and tenderness in his gaze.

"You're going to be the death of me," he murmured, his voice low and gravelly with emotion.

Random tags! @megalony @amaretigris @harrywavycurly @swiftmendeshoran @niallerspayno @nialls-golf-putt

#niall horan x reader #fanfiction #niall horan oneshot #niall horan love story #niall horan fanfics #niall fanfic #frat boy niall x reader #niall horan blurb #niall horan fanfic #niall horan #niall horan fake texts #niall horan fluff #one direction x reader #one direction

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