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#it’s all a concept and i’m so bad at explaining it
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I don’t understand the appeal of Gnarpy’s old design and why it’s missed by so many fans.
I love Gnarpy. Xey are my favorite Regretevator character, but something that bogs my mind is the constant obsession some Regretevator fans have with a design that was replaced due to behind the scene controversy. I will admit, I do feel bad that the design was tarnished as a result of its creator’s degenerate behavior, but I can’t help but ask why people continue to view the redesign as a terrible thing. Let me take you through a crash course about why I dislike the old design and how the redesign is actually the best thing to happen to Gnarpy in an artistic standpoint. Allow me to explain:
Let’s face it, the original design was bland. For what is supposed to be an anthropomorphic alien cat warlord with a superiority complex, the original design fails at conveying that. Good character design should be able to tell the viewer something about that character’s personality and who they are just by looking at them. The original design fails at doing that. It’s just a generic green cat with some antennae and glowing stuff, that’s it. There’s nothing that tells me xyr an intergalactic general, no attributes that makes xem seem otherworldly like an alien should be, and it just doesn’t match the rudeness, arrogance, and exaggerated energy of xyr in-game dialogue. Instead, it just made Gnarpy look like uninspired furrybait for the sake of furrybait, which to me is an insult towards a genuinely interesting character concept.
The redesign on the other hand is way more faithful to Gnarpy’s character than the original design ever was. Redesigned Gnarpy looks more cartoony, having more alien-like details such as four arms, four eyes, conjoined ears, double tails with pincers, and a red outfit with a yellow star badge. Not only that, xyr color scheme is more interesting, xey have a recognizable silhouette, and xyr new animations perfectly capture xyr pompous ego. Some may argue that the deviation from the blocky style makes xem less charming, but to me, I feel the opposite. The complex goofiness of the new design not only fits xyr personality perfectly, it also gives xem a sort of an Invader Zim/Peridot type of charm that makes me like Gnarpy’s character so much more.
Overall, I know that art is subjective and I know that making this confession may have put me at risk of getting publicly executed (French Revolution styled). I just don’t get the appeal of such a bland design, especially one made by a creep. I like the way Gnarpy looks now and I feel that most Regretevator fans are too harsh on it solely because it deviates away from the original. Yes, it was a sudden change nobody asked for, but that doesn’t make it right to immediately hate it without giving it a chance (also it’s not like the developers had a choice). If you genuinely prefer the old design, have no ill intent on bashing you for your preferences. If you like it, all power to you. I’m just tired of hearing the vocal parts of the fandom complain about a fictional character just because they were changed. Old Gnarpy is dead, xey died behind the Shwaffle House parking lot. Just be glad Gnarpy didn’t suffer the same fate as Miché did: completely removed from the game.
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sea-jello · 2 years
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ive noticed a pattern in the music that repeats in jeremy and christines relationship so heres my analysis
first up, we have the "christine" tune. you know the one im talking about. i think this tune is used to represent the stage of their relationship when their feelings are not mutual. mostly its used whenever they are talking ABOUT her, or jeremys love for her. for example when she appears and jeremy watches from a distance, or when the squip uses her and jeremys crush as leverage, like in upgrade. it’s also used in the play when christine gets squipped, and professes her “love” to jeremy. again, it’s still technically not mutual
then, we have the whole melody with “why am i telling this to you / guess there’s a part of me that wants to / i guess a part of me likes to [whatever]”. now this bit is used to represent when the feeling IS mutual, or when jeremy (and the audience) thinks it’s mutual. it’s in ilpr, a guy that i’d kinda be into, and when christine finally decides to go out with jeremy in voices in my head. in ilpr that line obviously makes us and jeremy believe christine has some sort of attraction or whatever to jeremy and just the SLIGHTEST chance the feelings might be mutual. in guy that i’d kinda be into the verse is again obviously MAJOR hinting at jeremy and us that maybe christine IS talking about jeremy, maybe it IS mutual. and voices in my head is self explanatory. i’m specifically repeating the word mutual just to make it more obvious
also fun little extra in a guy that i’d kinda be into, “she is totally into you” is the same tune as “why am i telling this to you”. the “why am i telling this to you” tune is a sort of god i can’t think of the word rn but like beginning?? hinting?? at the mutual-ness, which could totally tie back to the i guess voices in jeremy’s head telling him “yeah she IS into you, the feeling is mutual” yk what i’m talking about. it’s all a concept in my brain that i can’t articulate roll with it
now case in point, i think the little scene that made me realise and come up with all this bullshit can better represent everything. the scene at the halloween party, a guy that i’d kinda be into reprise. it starts off with the second melody, the mutual melody. “it’s kinda killer to sit and chat with you” and all that of course leads jeremy (and us) to believe christine might reciprocate his feelings, that it might be mutual. and then it shifts into the first melody, the not mutual melody, when jeremy’s gearing himself up to ask her out and christine turns him down because it’s not mutual
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pixlokita · 2 months
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I saw the Epic Mickey beta trailer and felt so robbed so I decided to make my own concepts of the game 😤 and then @pekoeboo was also losing it so we came up with a bunch of concepts, the heart being a stabilizer was her idea ;-; and she helped with that fourth pose :’>
Disney how could u take the edge away from us … Disney when I catch you Disney, Disney when I catch you…
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poppyseed799 · 1 year
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I feel like life series fanon jimmy is kind of mischaracterized and there’s an easy way to make sure you’re doing it right: he has a lot of unearned confidence
#the tags is where I’m going to ACTUALLY say stuff LOL!!!#but like I love life series Jimmy mkay. he’s got that curse of dying first and all. which is what I mean by fanon cuz curses aren’t real#but a lot of fans make it like Jimmy accepts the curse? or even acknowledges that it’s real. which bugs me a bit cuz No He Does Not#(side note tho. I’m not mad about it. I know ppl wanna explore the concept of someone cursed to die first and that’s what they’re doing)#but like Jimmy would just be so in denial about it okay. even if you managed to convince him he would be like ‘..BUT SURELY THIS TIME’#and this relates to ranchers too. I love ranchers ok. mostly cuz my sister does tbh LMAOO she loves them. but ranchers fan content isn’t#what I’m looking for cuz it’s so often stuff like.. Jimmy being like ‘I’m sorry I’m cursed’ and Tango being like ‘it’s ok love u anyway’#but it’s really more like ‘CURSED?? NO! WE WILL WIN!’ which I think is MORE fun for the aftermath of their death. meeting in the afterlife.#I NEED to see ranchers content where they keep denying that the curse is real then Jimmy dies and they’re ghosts or whatever and Jimmy’s#like ‘oh no. we didn’t break the curse. tango probably hates me now. he only liked me cuz we thought the curse wasn’t real.’ and tango to be#like upset at first as anyone would be when they die. but then he like notices the way Jimmy is acting and he’s like ‘no.. ranchers 4 life’#???? what am I saying. hire me for writing fanfic I totally know what I’m doing.#anyways what I’m saying is Jimmy is the canary but he’s the canary that’s like ‘SURELY I can sing for the miners the whole way THIS time’#he is NOT the canary who says ‘WELL time to eventually stop singing in this cave’#HOWEVER I do think that although he has loads of unearned confidence and is in a constant state of denial. he does also have that crumble#sometimes. so it’s not totally ooc imo for him to act like that. but it would be rare moments and also mostly post death#ANOTHER SIDE NOTE I WANNA SAY. I HATE the way I’m saying this as if it’s fact. it’s my personal analysis and just because I think it’s right#doesn’t mean I want to present it as undeniable fact. I could be misinterpreting. if you want to interpret life!Jimmy’s character different#then go on ahead. I don’t hate fanon Jimmy I just wish I saw more like how I see him. that is all.#ok I lied I also wanna add that I’m bad at explaining things ESPECIALLY personalities so it’s possible that I didn’t convey what I wanted to#say properly too. sorry. OKAY NOW THAT IS ALL.
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fingertipsmp3 · 1 year
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I love thinking I’m super behind on the homework but then discovering I’m actually sound
#at least three people that i know of haven’t done last week’s homework#which isn’t toooo crazy. BUT. what is crazy is that i’ve just seen someone post their code in the slack channel for debugging help#and it’s for an exercise we were given more than two weeks ago#which begs the question of WHY i’ve been trying to get all my homework done within a week of it being set#i haven’t always managed it. i haven’t started on the homework from last wednesday because i’m 85% sure i’ve broken my 11ty site#and i haven’t broken it so badly that i can’t salvage it but it’s also like….. i’d rather just create a new one than fix it#like i’d rather set up a completely new repo and everything#because my current repo is in a stupid place#i also need to find out how to add bootstrap to a nunjuck file. i’m pretty sure my instructor explained it during the last class#but the overall concept of hunting down the recording sounds absolutely exhausting to me#i’ll get it done this weekend#even if our deadlines are super flexible (as they seem to be lol) i don’t want to be rushing to get a bunch of work done at the end of the#course. like i know there are a couple of things i’ll want to fix and resubmit (which we’re allowed to do apparently) but i want everything#to be more or less done in fairly good time#i just don’t want to have to worry about dozens of pieces of work all at once#like i feel bad enough right now knowing i have 2 classes’ worth of homework to get through and i’m about to receive more homework today#i can’t imagine how i’d feel if i was still working on stuff from week two. couldn’t be me but you all stay safe out there#personal
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strawberryfaced · 5 months
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ohh my god i hate feeling. i want to dissolve into something else. take away my heart or something i just wish i wasn’t my head wasn’t so deep. I really don’t want it to get bad again this year . I really dont
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silliness-inc · 1 year
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laurasimonsdaughter · 10 months
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Picture this: Dragons using their caves to age cheese. Dragon Cheesemakers!!
The dragon coiled his enormous body, completely blocking the entrance of the tunnel that lead to the caves.
“No,” he snarled, smoke pluming from his nose.
The cheesemonger pinched the bridge of her own nose. “Look, I explained this to you at the start,” she tried once more. “I make cheese.”
“Yes,” the agreed, nodding his scaly head.
“Then I bring the cheese here.”
“Yes.”
“Then you store all the cheese in your cave, keeping it at the perfect temperature and humidity.”
“Yes.” He sounded particularly proud of this part.
“And then when the cheese has ripened,” she concluded. “I come to pick the cheese up again.”
A thunderous scowl clouded his maw. “No.”
“But that’s how it works!” she cried in exasperation. “I make the cheese, you store the cheese, I sell the cheese, I make more cheese!” She peered up at him. “You do realise I cannot bring you new cheese until I have sold this cheese.”
The dragon considered this for a moment. “Ah, but what if—” he began. “What if you go and make more cheese. And bring me the cheese. And I put it in my cave, with the rest of the hoard. And then I keep it there forever.”
“No,” she said flatly.
It was remarkable how much a dragon could look like it had just swallowed a lemon.
“You can’t keep cheese forever,” she insisted. “It will spoil and go bad!”
“You said it would get better and better!” the dragon roared indignantly. “And I take good care of them! With the air flow and the humidity and the temperature!”
“And that is great,” she said, trying to smile through her frustration. “But when a cheese is ripe, it’s ripe! Then you should not be kept anymore, it should be eaten.”
The dragon scraped it’s formidable claws against the stony ground and sulked.
“Look…” The cheese mongering business did not tend to require a lot of sweet-talking, but she was making an effort. “I’m sure the cheeses that aged in your cave are the best cheeses people have ever tasted. When they find out how delicious they are they will want us to make loads more. Maybe several caves’ worth!”
The reptilian eyes stared at her with disgruntled, reluctant interest. “Several caves?”
“If we’re lucky! And I could make so much cheese that I could bring you new cheese as soon as I pick up the aged cheese. Your cave would never even be empty!”
This seemed to strike a chord. The dragon lifted his head a little.
“And that would really be much better for the rest of your hoard,” she continued with fresh inspiration. “Because if you leave cheese too long, it might go bad and spoil the cheeses next to it too!”
A nervous ripple went through the beast’s scaly body, but he clearly was not convinced just yet. “But what sort of a hoard is it if I have to give it away,” he complained.
“Well! Cheese is not just any old hoard! It’s a developing creation! And you will have a hoard that is constantly developing too. Constantly changing, but, if we do this right, never shrinking.”
The dragon looked at her solemnly, wavering with uncertainty. Perhaps she shouldn’t hold it against the poor thing, it must be a difficult concept to wrap his head around.
“And I will tell you what,” she said encouragingly. “If business is good, I can start investing in some really good crumbly cheeses. You can keep those in your cave for five whole years!”
“That is quite a long time for humans, is it not?” he said, sounding a little more cheerful.
“Very long. Especially when it comes to cheese. Cheeses that have been aged that long are very expensive.”
In retrospect, she should perhaps have led with that. Gourmand or not, a dragon was still a dragon after all. A glittering, toothy grin appeared on her recalcitrant business partner’s shout and he moved just enough for her to move past him into the mountain.
“Tell me more about this expensive cheese that crumbles.”
She hid a smirk. “If you help me carry some of the current ones out, it would be my pleasure.”
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reidrum · 17 days
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you say ‘what a mind’ | s.r.
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A/N: she’s back and with fluff! (?) exams were really putting me through the ringer but i missed posting so i fixed up this draft i had, i hope you enjoy :D ive been listening to sabrina 25/8 since she dropped so hopefully song inspired fics coming soon 🤞🏽
summary: you get really excited about something new you learned and spencer gets really excited about you
wc: a short n sweet 1k
cw: none, tooth rotting fluff
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With Spencer's extensive knowledge of just about everything, you had assumed that there wasn’t much you contribute to his abundant learning.
You maybe weren’t three-PhD’s smart, but you were smart, averagely speaking. But you knew Spencer was smart, and truth be told it intimidated you. He never made you feel bad about not knowing something, ever. Anytime he gets to talk to you about anything his face lights up like the night sky.
There was, however, one time you had come home all excited to explain a concept from class that finally clicked for you. And the first person you wanted to tell was Spencer.
He watched you bound up to him with a spring in your step, bright eyed and wide cheeks as you told him, “I have to tell you about what I learned about today, it finally made sense to me. Like it felt like a real life light bulb final puzzle piece fitting type moment!”
He smiled warmly down at your eager face, “Alright angel, lay it on me.”
“Okay, I know it’s a little stupid it’s taken me this long to get it, but it’s—“
The call of your name sternly yet fondly falling from Spencer’s lips interrupts your self deprecating preamble, “Hey, we don’t do that, remember? We talked about this.”
Your rants almost always started with some self deprecating remarks, and he would always frown and try to interject and shut them down, to which you’d wave him off under the guise of, “If I stop, I’ll forget!” You were smart, but stubborn to a fault. He loved you for it, but it was hard for him to see you not understand the value you held, the value that your voice and your words and your opinions held. The value that he knew with all certainty you possessed.
A sheepish blush rises on your cheeks as you mumble, “Sorry.”
His fingers trickle closer to yours and wrap around them firmly, bringing you to sit on the couch next to him as he pulls your legs over to rest on his.
“Don’t be sorry, baby,” he says saccharinely, “We’re working on being nicer to ourselves right?”
You nod, he smiles softly back at you and continues, “Okay, tell me what you learned today.”
You start on your long explanation of the inner workings of the nervous system and its intricacies, explaining details and anecdotes that really showcase the inner workings of how your mind processes information.
Spencer can’t help but stare at you in deep fascination, complete with an awestruck smile and glimmering eyes.
He’s met hundreds of scientists, specialists, celebrities even, and listen to them talk about their research in extensive detail and with expansive knowledge. Hell, he’s had to do it himself with his three doctorates.
But as he sits in front of you, watching the person he’s most fond of on this planet watch you talk with so much speed, conviction, passion, with your hands move with purpose and excitement, he truly swears he has never been more in love with you than that moment.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” you ask cautiously.
“You,” he moves closer, “Are so intelligent, did you know that?”
“Spencer, I’m not in the mood for jokes plea—“
“No, my love. You are brilliant,” he moves closer to be an inch away from you, placing his hands on your cheeks, “The way you process information is fascinating. When I watch you explain things to me I can see you organize it in your pretty head. It is actually mesmerizing watching you absorb knowledge the way you do. You’re like, a beautiful puzzle all undone, but by the forces of nature you’re able to put yourself together and bear the finished product to me, to anyone.”
Your eyes tear up, “Spence…what the fuck.”
He chuckles softly, “I mean it,” he holds you firmly, planting you in the roots of his belief, “What a mind you have, darling.”
It’s enough to make you tuck your head into his chest, obstructing his view from your imminent tearfall.
“You can’t just say things like that.” you mumble against the soft fabric of his shirt.
Spencer instinctively wraps his arm around your torso, letting the other hand take purchase in your hair, gently stroking it down, “Why not?” He speaks softly.
“Because…I might think you're like, in love with me or something.” You joke.
His laugh rumbles through his chest and into your rested head, “Would that be so bad?”
“Yes.”
“And why is that?”
“It’s going to be another whole moon cycle before I have another a-ha moment like this again. I’ll have nothing to impress you with.”
Spencer smiles and sighs, squeezing you tighter against him, “You always impress me.”
You groan, “Ugh, you don’t have to say that to make me feel better.”
“You do know that you’re really smart, right?” you open your mouth to argue but he cuts you off, “You always underestimate yourself, but you’re really one of the smartest people I know. And I know a lot of smart people.”
A deep sigh leaves you, but he continues, “And you don’t have to believe me. I’ll believe it enough for the both of us. You and your brain are remarkable, so when you come to me with your a-ha moments thinking I’ll be impressed with your spark of knowledge, just know that I am impressed with you, but it’s more because I get to see you realize just how capable you are yourself.”
The calming motion of his fingers through your hair tether you back to this world, your insides fluttering about like butterflies in an open field. It was hard not to believe his words when Spencer was always so kind to you. It was always so easy for you to play it off like you didn’t deserve it.
But Spencer knew wholeheartedly that you did deserve it, that you were even entitled to it. And he’d spend the rest of his life reminding you. That, you knew for a fact.
“I love you,” you say softly, “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me angel, I love you too.” He mumbles in your head, his hand trailing down your sides in comfort.
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floueris · 24 days
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College boyfriend! riki
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College boyfriend! Riki x stem gf
genre : crack, fluff
summary : Riki as your college boyfriend
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College boyfriend! riki who is a history major
College boyfriend! riki who was so excited to finally be able to join his hyungs in uni
College boyfriend! riki who you met in high school (self promo but classmate! riki fic is here)
College boyfriend! riki who is smitten with you his stem major gf!
College boyfriend! riki who always makes it a point to try to have breakfast together before either of y’all’s first class (GUYS ITS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS OKAY, I’m screaming bye, me when)
College boyfriend! riki who tries to have at least lunch, dinner or supper with you if he isn’t able to meet you for breakfast that day
College boyfriend! riki who if he isn’t able meet you that day would always try to leave things in your bag the previous day for a little surprise as he says
College boyfriend! riki whose favourite thing to leave in your bag is a cute love notes telling you how pretty you are or how smart you are and it’s because you always gets extra affectionate after you find them
College boyfriend! riki who is in the dance and baseball team (i KNOWWWW so many people would say basketball but like have u seen that vlog with him and jake, bro has a mean pitch)
College boyfriend! riki who gets extra clingy when tired he is tired (he thinks you are his battery pack, being clingy with you only recharges his energy)
College boyfriend! riki who is a very hardworking person and juggles his time well
College boyfriend! riki who loves to go on study dates with you after school (only because you make studying less tiring when you are there with him)
College boyfriend! riki who enjoys the peace and comfortable silence during these dates (also because he thinks you are really hot like REALLLY HOTTTT when you are focusing on something)
College boyfriend! riki who is elated when he found out that you want to minor in history
College boyfriend! riki who basically becomes your tutor the moment you have a history related module
College boyfriend! riki who is such a good tutor, only because of the rewards that he gets after you do well on a test (his reward being kisses LOL)
College boyfriend! riki who sits beside you during these tutoring sessions
College boyfriend! riki who has an arm around your chair
College boyfriend! riki who feels that you are too far and grabs the base of your chair to pull you closer to him (PLEASEEEEE I NEED HIM SO SO SO BAD, honestly if someone did this to me I would fold SOOO BAD)
College boyfriend! riki who gets a little all up in your face when he is trying to explain an important concept
College boyfriend! riki who does it on purpose because he wanted to see your flushed ears
College boyfriend! riki who then tucks your hair behind your ear and gives you a loud smooch on your cheek
College boyfriend! riki who can’t help but giggle when you smack his sturdy chest in shock and embarrassment
College boyfriend! riki who can’t help but look at you with a love struck expression as you clear your throat and compose yourself
College boyfriend! riki who thinks your the cutest, kindest, most gorgeous, most perfect person he’s ever met
College boyfriend! riki who just can’t help loving you more and more as the days goes by
College boyfriend! riki who always get a warm feeling, like how a hot drink feels on a freezing day every time he sees you
College boyfriend! riki who is so utterly and helpless in love with you even though you guys have been together for a while
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A/n : someone save me please , I’m TEWWWWWWW DOWN BAD FOR RIKI OMFGGGG, I literally need to start dating him or else I’m going to start crying ( guys in all seriousness this is a joke🙏 para-social relationships aren’t healthy 🙏🤫) also self projecting a little because STEM IS CRAZY
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autolenaphilia · 7 months
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The anti-kink moral crusade rests on a lot of transmisogynistic assumptions.
Of course it’s no surprise, since it rests on ideas from the moralizing arguments about bdsm made by radfems in the 70s. The only change is that they are being massively hypocritical and inconsistent about which kinks are bad now, as I pointed out before. Now it’s only certain kinks, like consensual non-consent and fauxcest, that are bad because they “fetishize abuse”, and not bdsm as whole, despite that being inarguably true about bdsm.
And that’s purely to broaden the appeal of such arguments, so that even self-described “leatherfags” can moralize about fauxcest. The morals and principles are frankly just “It’s okay if gay men call their boyfriends “daddy”, because I find that hot, but if a trans lesbian couples pretend to be sisters it’s evil.”
And you can’t really appropriate the radfem arguments about kink without taking their transmisogyny onboard, since they stem from the same transmisogynist bio-determinist root ideology. Janice Raymond in The Transsexual Empire explained trans women through a lens of pathological sadomasochism. Years before Blanchard’s autogynephilia concept, radfems have seen transfemininity and kink as the same thing.
The image of the trans woman painted by radfems then and now, is of privileged males appropriating the pain and suffering of real wombyn, and playacting this suffering for their own perverted sexual amusement. And that is the same image painted of trans women with incest and cnc kinks in modern callout posts. They just remove the explicitly terfy language to make it less obvious. Instead of making a mockery of misogyny in general, we are instead accused of mocking the experiences of the survivors of sexual abuse.
And that boils down to the same thing. Survivors of sexual assault are often as a group assumed to be afab. This ties into a specific transmisogynist discourse. It’s one that argues that afab children are more often sexually assaulted, and that trans women are not targeted by sexual violence pre-transition, and comes to the conclusion that this proves that trans women are male socialized and privileged. This is the fairly nasty transmisogynist undercurrent here.
And it’s proven when in discussions about the transmisogyny of callout culture, a common cliché line in response is that “clearly some people’s worst oppression is being told they are freaks for shipping incest.” This treats transfems as ultra-privileged and transmisogyny as not real at all.
Of course in reality, transfems are disproportionate targets of sexual violence even in childhood and pre-transition. And many survivors of childhood abuse have these problematic abuse-fetishizing kinks, and use it to deal with their trauma, including many of the kinky transfems being called out.
And even if no one involved in the sexual roleplay and fiction being criticized have trauma, the trauma of other non-involved people is not a good argument for its destruction. It’s a reasonable demand to ask for triggering material to be tagged properly so you can avoid it, it’s unreasonable to demand it shouldn’t exist.
Yet transfems are expected to accede to the latter demand. And I think this is because of what May Peterson calls transfeminized debt. It’s how we trans women in feminist circles are expected to be perfect women and perfect feminists to be acknowledged as women at all, instead of as monsters to be destroyed. Of course because nobody is perfect, this leads to every trans woman eventually being thought of as a monster.
We are treated as having to pay off the debt of male socialization/privilege to get basic human rights. And this in practice means conceding every disagreement with TME people, and agreeing to every demand they make of us. Or else we get the hot allostatic load treatment.
And that’s why kinky transfems are expected to fulfil the ridiculous demand from certain puritanical TME people that “I’m not involved in your kink, but I have trauma relating to it, so you can’t do it.” And are treated as evil monsters for not fulfilling it. It’s clearly transfeminized debt and transmisogyny, we are treated as privileged perverted monsters, inherently exempt from sexual violence. And that is used to justify sexual harassment, in the form of callout posts for our sex lives.
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oatmilkandvellichor · 2 years
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slowly remembering so many of the reasons why i avoid being wordy online like the plague
#i love how the everything just bubbles to the surface in me#the ways my brain weaves through things in nonsensical patterns that show in how i communicate#the way i my brain is always trying to use words that don’t exist to explain concepts that language fails me on#the ways that my brain soaks up shards of languages i am culturally immersed in to try and fill those gaps in how i’m able to express things#i feel so strange sometimes with how i genuinely talk and type#the more time i let myself be as i am the more blatant it all becomes#and with that i feel more and more like i stick out awkwardly#my sentences are full of made up english - mvskokean - yiddish - yinglish - hebrew - arabic#and i feel like in some ways it’s ‘worse’ in writing. more comes when i lose the ability to stumble so awkwardly over my phonetics & rhythm#it’s still v prevalent verbally - my brain usually fills in the gaps with nonsensical words or an excess of words that barely scratch it#and it all grows more and more over time#i swear i blinked and the next thing i knew i was using hebrew and english filler words in near equal volume#all of my interjections became yiddish or arabic#and i stopped retyping written laughter in english#despite not even knowing when i stopped automatically laughing in english#and the more i actually ‘speak’ online the more i fucking see it#i suppose i’m notoriously bad at processing half of what i say out loud -#so it would make sense that all that awareness would crop up once i started typing more frequently#dai.. for real i’m a complete balagan rn. i need to sleep. i’m so tired. i’ve been gmurah for days and the party tonight did me in.#i’m going to be for real now y’all - yalla bye ♥️♥️♥️
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leilakisakabiri · 12 days
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Miami Hot Lap (CL)
Summary: You're forced to do a Miami Hot Lap with your boyfriend.
Warning(s): Just fluff.
A/N: Ahh I love this concept!! Requests are open for Charles and Lando.
Word Count: 800+
Masterlist
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Being invited to an F1 race through a brand seemed like a fun idea at first. You would get to see your boyfriend for the first time in weeks, watch the race in your hometown, and somehow still be able to call it work. It was a win-win situation.
That was until they approached you with a video idea.
"So since you're working with one of our sponsored brands for the weekend, a Miami native, and dating a driver, we thought it was only fair to ask you to do the Miami hot lap video." The F1 content manager explained.
"Miami hot lap?" You questioned, unfamiliar with what they wanted you to do.
"Yeah y'know just go for a few laps on the track with a driver. For you, it would be Charles of course." She assured.
You shook your head rapidly, shrinking back, "No thank you. I don't drive with Charles."
"But he's your boyfriend? Surely you've driven with him before?"
You sighed, "Yeah in a city, where he's forced to follow the speed limit, I would never be able to handle going that fast. He's too scary without restrictions."
She furrowed her eyebrows, opening her mouth to respond before she was cut off.
"Spreading lies about me again?"
You felt your lips upturn in a smile as he came up behind you, fingers entwining with yours as he kissed your cheek.
You turned to face him, attempting to be firm, "I love you, but I'm not driving with you." You repeated.
One hour later you found yourself being strapped into the passenger seat of his car, cursing yourself for giving in after he convinced you it wouldn't be that bad.
The camera sat on the dashboard, recording the both of you.
"Go slow," You warned, as he got the green light to pull away.
"We'll get no views then." He argued.
You started at him in disbelief, "Would you rather have more views on a video or have a girlfriend in one piece?"
It was quiet for a beat too long and you put your hand up, "You know what don't answer that. I don't want to know."
"So how do you like driving with me so far?" He asked once you made it past the first lap.
You nodded, "Not bad, right now I feel like we're going to get food."
He smirked, "Well in that case go on and get comfortable."
You eyed him skeptically but you decided to trust him, "Okaaay," you dragged out the word as you slouched a bit more in the seat, letting your body relax against the seat, going as far as to admire the view outside the window.
The peace only lasted for a second before Charles was slamming on the pedal, sending the car lurching forward at record speeds.
While he got a shot of adrenaline, you felt your stomach somersault as your body jolted backward.
“Charles. Charles!!” Your voice filled with panic, fingers grabbing onto the side of the car for dear life, eyes wide as you refused to take your eyes off the rapidly passing road in front of you.
He laughed at your reaction, only stopping once he realized how serious you were. He dropped a hand down to squeeze yours, reassuring you, “Relax I won’t let anything happen to you.”
The supposedly sweet action had the opposite effect, “Keep both your hands on the wheel!” You shrieked, sending him into another fit of laughter.
You put a hand to your forehead in shock and disbelief, "We're going to die."
You felt hysterical, and his shit-eating grin only irked you further.
"We're not going to die. I promise." He swore, trying to calm you down.
You shoved his shoulder, "Your promises mean nothing to me anymore Charles. We're going to die and it's all your fault." you deadpanned.
“Y/n amor I’m barely pushing 90 mph.” He revealed.
Your body froze, before finally losing some tension, “Oh."
You checked the meter seeing that he was telling the truth, "It feels a lot faster,” you argued, “Especially with the sharp turns," you elaborated.
He agreed with you but not before side-eyeing you, "Right."
"So should we go faster?" He proposed.
"Charles," You warned.
"Why so formal?"
You glanced at each other for a second and already knew what would happen from the unfiltered excitement in his eyes, "Hold on amour."
You watched in horror as the meter rapidly rose hitting up to 130mph, you mouthed a "help me" to the camera.
“I think I’m gonna throw up everywhere.” You groaned once the car had finally come to a halt.
Charles patted your head affectionately as you laid your head against your knees, “You’ll be ok.”
“No. I’m going to projectile vomit on this dashboard,” you warned, “I’m never driving with you again.”
He furrowed his eyebrows at your comment but didn't say anything, instead facing the camera.
"Well thanks for joining us today, if you want more videos like this-"
You lifted your head off your knees when you noticed he hadn't finished his sentence, finding him staring at you expectedly.
"Like and subscribe?" you questioned, voice hoarse.
"Exactly. See you guys later!" He waved bye to the camera and moved your head to lay on his lap so you could rest.
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lavenderchqn · 20 days
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"TO PRACTICE FREEDOM"
synopsis — You're the biggest scaredy cat living amongst the people of Scions of Canopy. You try to get over your fear of heights... by trying out bungee jumping under the watchful eye of your partner. Let's just say... it doesn't go according to plan. pairing — kinich x gn!reader warnings — near death experience (falling from heights), minor character death, spoiler warnings for kinich's story and voicelines, ajaw is a lore accurate menace notes — I've had an idea for this as soon as we learned that Kinich has interest in extreme sports... reading his story felt weird (the longer I am in genshin fandom, the more stuff I predict right...)
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The People of Huitztlan believe in the concept of absolute freedom. That’s why so many youngsters throw themselves into dangerous sports with a lack of safeguard measures. Perhaps having nothing securing a person allows them to experience said freedom. 
To practice death is to practice freedom, after all. 
“We’re here,” Kinich says, looking in your direction. He has held your hand ever since you started your trek up the higher regions of the Coatepec Mountain. “Do you want to take a break?” 
“Y-Yeah… I need to… sit.” You slowly get down with the help of Kinich. Only after he signalises being opposite of you, do your eyes open.
Kinich has taken a sit too, still holding onto your hand. He’s slowly rubbing circles trying to ground you as best as possible. 
Well… here you are — the biggest scaredy cat, who decided to try and work on your fear of heights by trying out bungee jumping. It’s quite ironic really. Not only are you a resident of Scions of the Canopy, which literally is suspended off the cliffs, but also in a relationship with a guy, whose second name could be ‘extreme sports’. 
To say your mind felt pressure to get over it would be quite an understatement. 
“We can still get down. Just say the word.” Kinich says, keeping his eyesight directly on you. Even if you had asked him to help you with your fears, he’d never force you to do so. Sure, it’d be pretty cool to share interests with a partner, but it should never come at the cost of their mental health. 
You shake your head. You have to try. Maybe it won’t be as bad as you think? Kinich will do everything in his power to keep you safe. 
“I can do this.” You answer, taking a deep breath. 
“Well then, chop chop SLOWPOKE!” Ajaw zooms right near your face, spooking you to bits. “Stop wasting MY precious time!” 
“Just how loud can you be…” Kinich sighs, getting up to shoo Ajaw away. “Tone it down a notch, will you?” 
The tiny saurian starts arguing with your partner, although you can easily tell it’s one-sided. No matter how much he would try, the most he could bring out of Kinich were insulting comebacks. Ajaw could try and rage the male in multiple ways… and yet, unfortunately for the dragon, your partner was too resilient to die from anger. 
In the meantime of their dissing match, you slowly get up on your legs. Ajaw is right… You don’t want to waste Kinich’s time because you’re scared and worried. He takes notice of your sudden movement, once again getting close to you. 
“Do you want to try now?” He asks, holding his hand out. These are obvious signs, that he will lead you step by step. 
“Yeah… I think I’m ready.” 
“Alright. Hold still. I’m going to put the climbing belt on you now.” 
As he says, he does. Kinich does it slowly, explaining his movement every step of the way. You’re aware, he’s doing it to ease your mind… and it’s working well. In the blink of an eye, the sound of a snap-hook getting attached brings you back from a short daydreaming session.
“All done.” He takes another look at you, checking if the equipment is snug against your body while making sure it isn’t digging into your skin. “Can you move for me?” 
“Yeah, sure!” You do a slow spin, followed by kneeling on one foot. “Although I can feel the harness… it’s not uncomfortable.” 
“That's good.”
Once again, it’s another series of your partner explaining the next steps. All you need to do is find a point to connect your line to. He already connected the rope to your belt. The other end is currently sitting tightly in his hand. 
“You’re not going to hold me when I jump?” You ask, growing worried. 
“I know you’d feel more comfortable with me doing that,” Kinich starts answering, his eyes wandering for an anchor. “I don’t want to also fall down the second you jump.” 
He even explains the physics behind it, ending his speech by saying it’s best you move further to look for a good place to jump from. 
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You’re walking next to Kinich, admiring the scenery. With the rope in his hands, you’re feeling much more comfortable. Although he’s trying to talk here and there… his eyes are still locked on finding a stable anchor. 
Unfortunately for the both of you, an anchor is nowhere near. Curse you lunatics with no regard for their safety. 
“So many jumping platforms, and yet not a singular anchor?” He questions, closing his eyes. 
All of a sudden your eyes land on a ruffed pheasant that just landed on one of the platforms. You’ve never seen one so close! Without thinking about your safety, you start inching closer towards the bird.
Your steps are slow and cautious. The bird, a magnificent creature with iridescent plumage, seems utterly unaware of your presence. Its feathers shimmer in the sunlight, creating a mesmerising display of greens and oranges. An odd sense of calm wash over you, momentarily forgetting the anxiety that’s been gnawing at your insides.
"Careful," Kinich warns, his voice seeming distant as if muffled by the pounding of your heart.
The platform beneath your feet is uneven, its surface worn smooth by the countless jumps of those, who came before you. With no warning, Ajaw jumps from behind your shoulder, screaming right next to your ear. The bird, startled, flies away. You try to also get away when your foot catches on one of the loose boards. The world tilts violently, and suddenly, you're weightless.
A scream tears from your throat as you plummet downwards, the wind rushing past your ears, drowning out all other sounds. The landscape blurs into a mix of greens and browns, the ground below rushing up to meet you at an alarming speed. For a split second, your mind goes blank — pure terror seizing every thought, every instinct. You’re going to fall to your death. 
Back on the hill, Kinich’s body goes numb for a second. He’s seen this happen once before. He cannot allow it to happen again. You’re not his drunkard gambling mess of a father, and he’s not his seven-year-old self. Kinich will save you, even if it’s the last thing he ever does. 
The blood is pounding in his ears when he shifts all his weight to his legs. Only when he cannot feel any force trying to get him off the cliff, does he start pulling up. With a sharp tug, he jerks you backwards, the rope connected to the harness snapping taut. The force of the pull knocks the air out of your lungs, but it stops your descent abruptly. You swing wildly in the air, the ground still far below, the rope swaying and creaking with the strain of holding your weight.
Above, you can hear Kinich shouting your name, his voice frantic, barely audible over the sound of your racing heartbeat. You cling to the rope, your hands shaking uncontrollably as the realisation of what just happened crashes over you. You almost fell to your death.
"Hold on!" Kinich yells, his voice breaking through the fog of panic in your mind. "I’ve got you, just hold on for me!"
Tears sting your eyes as you try to steady your breathing, every muscle in your body tensed and trembling. The rope holds firm, and slowly, agonisingly slowly, Kinich begins to pull you back up. Each inch feels like an eternity, but his strength and determination never waver.
As soon as your body reaches the ledge, Kinich grabs onto you, pulling you up with a force that nearly knocks you both off balance. He wraps his arms around you, holding you close as you collapse against him, shaking uncontrollably.
"I'm so sorry," he whispers, his voice unusually tight with emotion. "I should have been more careful. I should have—"
You shake your head, unable to speak, still trying to process the fact that you're alive, that you're safe. Kinich's arms tighten around you, his hand cradling the back of your head as if to shield you from any further harm.
"You're okay," he murmurs, repeating it like a mantra. "You're okay, and I'm here. I'm right here."
For a long moment, you stay there, clinging to him as the fear slowly ebbs away, replaced by a deep, overwhelming sense of relief. The world around you, once a blur of panic and chaos, begins to settle back into focus. The mountains, the sky, the distant sound of birds—all of it feels surreal as if you’ve been given a second chance to experience it. In your state, you don’t notice the glare Kinich is giving to his companion. 
If looks could kill, Ajaw would be dead. 
After a while of sitting idly, Kinich pulls back slightly, enough to look into your eyes. His face is pale, his expression filled with concern, but there's also a deep, unspoken resolve in his gaze. It’s quite different considering the death stare he was giving the saurian just a second ago. 
"We’re done here," he says gently but firmly. "No more extreme sports for today. We are getting you home.”
You nod, still too shaken to argue. As he helps you back onto solid ground, you realise how much you’ve relied on him, not just for safety, but for the courage to face your fears. And even though the experience was terrifying, there’s a small part of you that’s glad you tried, that you didn’t let fear win entirely. You can clearly say, you did indeed practice freedom today. 
In a moment you’re seated on his back, Kinich deciding you’ve had enough walking for today. He’s in absolute control now — and he’s picking the safest route possible. 
“Oh and Ajaw,” Kinich’s voice is laced with coldness. “Don’t think you’re getting away with the stunt you pulled today.” 
"WHAT?!"
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date of posting — september 5th 2024
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hazard-c-horror · 3 months
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I've been playing Dandy's World (Roblox game) nonstop for the past 8-10 (I've lost count) days. And decided to make a crossover Au. Things are still a work in progress, but I have some concept arts and ideas. For now, here are the concepts character sheets
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Updated
If you don’t want to look up/ play Dandy’s world, here’s a quick summary. I bad at explaining so sorry if it doesn’t make sense
You start by getting in an elevator which takes you to all theses different floors one by one. Toons (players) are tasked with extracting ichor from machines found around the map on each floor. But there are Twisteds (enemies) ;Toons consumed by ichor, patrolling the area as well. If they spot you they will chase you until you lose them. Or they hit you. If they do hit you they will be temporarily stunned/frozen before going back to normal patrol or chase. Most Twisteds have their own stats and or ability to help them find you
Each Toon have a different amount of stats and or ability to difference the play style.
Health: how many times you can hit before you perish
Skill check: when doing a machine sometimes skill checks will appear. This determines how big the skill check is.
Movement Speed: self explanatory
Stamina: how much stamina you have
Stealth: how far a twisted can see you, and what targets Twisteds prioritize
Extraction Speed: how fast you can do machines
Toon also have abilities. Some are passive and are always in play. While others are active and have to be activated, with a cooldown
On every even floor; before you go in, Dandy the face of the company, will appear and offer you items in the exchange for tapes (currency in the round)
There’s more but for now that’s all I’m gonna write
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charliemwrites · 1 month
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Greater Bad - Part 5!
This is the final chapter of this series. I had so much fun working on it, making myself write a character that was genuinely just really mean most of the time and not chickening out by softening him (mostly).
Again, a gigantic, smooch-filled thank you to ceilidho for letting me write this based off her drabble/concept.
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(The concept comes from @ceilidho’s concept/drabble of “military asset Soap” and heavily inspired also by @391780’s Nikto version. Please go check out theirs because they’re brilliantly written.)
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Content: Dub-Con/Non-Con Elements, Unreliable Narrator, Semi-Safe/Not-Sane/Dub-Con Intimacy
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You still smell the same.
Clean water, soap and skin. It saturates the back of his tongue when he inhales deep. The sharp, cloying scent of printer ink has been replaced by the buttery aroma of bread and sugar. It’s better. His mouth waters, canines too big and sharp in his mouth, jawing aching to bite down until he’s teething on bone. Scrape his imprint into marrow.
Some shrink mentioned it in those first sessions, before Laswell and Price realized their precious Johnny wasn’t lost in the hole in his temple.
The human olfactory sense is strongly associated with our memory. What smells like home to you, Soap?
The jagged puzzle of his mind didn’t have a piece for home. But it had one for his – you – and that’s just as good.
The humidity in the shower leaves him drowning in the scent of you, lungs heaving. If they’d waterboarded him with your perfume, he wouldn’t have struggled at all.
“Easy, easy,” your voice derails him.
Velvet and smooth, purring in the bottom of your throat. It bounces off the walls and cracks across his skull, a concussive force, disorients him. He grips tighter to keep his balance, swaying into you. You’re all slick and soft, caught between his body and the wall, nothing but naked skin and those big eyes that drive him more mad.
His face is still buried in the vulnerable curve of your neck; you taste just as good as you smell. You jump when he nips, a high noise caught on your clumsy tongue. He growls, wants to hear it. Wants to be overwhelmed by you until all his senses are blown out.
“I’m not saying no,” you soothe, hands skittering down his biceps.
Of course you’re not, not his girl. It’s not a matter of yes or no, not for the two of you. The moon doesn’t agree to orbit the Earth, the sun doesn’t choose to shine. You’re the gravity keeping his feet on the ground.
“Slow down a bit,” you murmur, “We’re not in a rush, are we?”
Just hearing you say “we” sends his heart thundering double-time and euphoria flooding his poisoned veins. “We” - you and him. You squeak as he thrusts hard against your lower stomach, where you’re pillowy and perfect from a life of plenty.
He doesn’t even process what you’ve said for a few moments, too busy nibbling “we” into your shoulder. Only when you thread shaky fingers into his hair – too excited to keep them steady, sweet thing – does his head surface over the swelling waves of desire to hear you properly.
“Missed you,” he explains, raking fingers over your thigh in hopes it’ll bruise. Your mouth parts on a gasp, inviting him in. He ravages your mouth, teeth snagging your plush lips. Needs to leave his mark everywhere for always. Don’t you get that? How could you ask him to slow down when your skin is still pristine, your cunt all tight and unspoiled – a fucking tragedy that.
“Ye missed me too, aye?” he asks. Of course you did, of course. Made this pretty little cottage for the two of you, filled it with so many things that he could never forget where he is again.
“I ken ye did.” He does you the favor of answering, since you’re too busy with his fingers in your mouth. You’ve gotten better with your priorities since that first reunion, laving your tongue over and between his digits rather than waste it on idle chatter. “Can go slow once I show yer mine. Been too fuckin’ long they kept us apart, little bird.”
Your fingers curl around his wrist. Must be satisfied with how wet they are, then. He presses down on your tongue one last time before pulling away.
“B-but you took care of them… we don’t need to—ah!”
He smirks as your entire body jolts. You’re already starting to warm up, but your saliva makes the slide between your delicate folds even easier. You’re just as silky as last time, clit shy at the top of your slit. He coos in your ear, gets you flushing and hot from filthy promises.
“Ye wan’ this just as much as I do,” he growls. Poor thing, he knows you like your little games and he’s being impatient. But it’s been too long and you’re playing with fire. “I ken ye do. Tell me ye do.”
You stutter in shock – if he still felt guilt, he’d feel bad for doubting you – and stumble over your words. He stills his hand to help you, bracing his arm over your head. The stretch of his body seems to distract you, mouth parted but frustratingly quiet as your round eyes roam scars and muscle.
He clicks his tongue and pinches your clit to catch your attention. You yelp, little nails sinking into his chest. He rumbles. It feels good, but he’s on a mission.
“Tell me,” he repeats when you blink up at him. “Tell me.”
“I-I just want to be able to go again,” you babble. “If I’m too sore…”
He chuckles. Is that all? “That won’ stop me, love. We’ll go plenty.”
You whine as he draws tight circles over your clit, coaxing it hard and swollen.
“I d-don’ wanna be t-too… sore! Christ!”
He huffs, caught between amusement and exasperation. Voice of reason you are, he knows you’ve got a point. Big as he is, and he knows he’ll lose any sense of restraint once he’s inside.
“I’ll make it good, bonnie,” he promises, biting kisses along your trembling jaw. “You’ll cum crying if tha’s what it takes.”
With that matter settled, he drops his head to your pretty tits. Water has beaded all over them and he jealously licks paths between each drop, flattening his tongue over your hard nipples. You moan and squeal as he sucks and nips, teasing them sensitive and achy. One of your hands tangles in his hair and tugs. Tingles race down his spine, scattering any sweet thoughts of going slow or gentle or with restraint.
You’re babbling at him but nothing could be more important than the rosettes he’s biting into your breasts. And you must agree because you’re getting so wet, leaking all over his rough palm, bucking your hips. He tilts the heel of his hand for you to grind against while he prods at your slick little hole.
You really have been good, somehow even tighter than he remembers. Of course, you were; he never doubted you. No wonder you were so insistent on prepping. He’d split you in half as you are now – fuck but that’s tempting.
“S-Soap – John. Please don’t… stop.”
“I won’ stop, birdie,” he soothes. Nothing could make him stop now.
Two is probably too much for you, but he loves the punched out little noise you make when he forces them in. The way your entrance clings and squeezes around his knuckles. How your spine goes tight and stiff, tilting your head back so that he has access to your singing throat. Pretty face all scrunched up as you struggle to adjust, stinging too much to even squirm. A flighty little bird right in the palm of his hand.
You’re so hot and wet inside. Feel fucking heavenly. Coating him in arousal, in need. His cock is aching to replace his fingers, feel you strangling him down to the base. Grinding against your thigh isn’t tiding him over anymore.
“Yer hand,” he grits out, “on my cock. Now.”
You shudder and circle the head, fingers tentative. Little tease.
He thrusts his fingers into you hard in retaliation, hips driving into the loose tunnel you’ve made. You must know what you’re doing, goading him on like this, plucking at his fraying patience.
“More,” he snarls, “or I’m going to use you like a fleshlight.” (Sooner than he was planning, anyway.)
You whimper and close your hand tighter, rubbing your thumb just under the head. Relief makes him generous, scissoring those two fingers inside you, easing you open. Lets you grind your clit on the meat of his thumb.
He crooks his fingers and finds a spot that has you mewling all sweet and precious. Does it over and over just to get your hand squeezing rhythmically around his shaft, precum dribbling over the back of your knuckles.
Christ, it’s been so long that he thinks he could blow just from this. Your voice in his ear, drooling pussy wrapped around his fingers, grinding into the open circle of your hand. But he needs to be inside you when he cums, he has to.
You don’t even seem to notice the third finger until it’s halfway inside, prying you open. Your legs buckle, knees shaking. He catches you with an arm around your waist, but it squishes you against his chest, the arm you’ve been stroking him with nearly immobilized. He can only stand the lack of stimulation for a few moments, occupying himself with his tongue down your throat.
“Enough,” he rasps, kicking the shower off.
Dazed, you blink at him in confusion, half-lidded and guileless, panting. He wants to fucking ruin you.
You yelp as he scoops you up, fingers still slippery where they grip your thigh. He croons as you cling, asking in a high, nervous voice where he’s going.
“Poor thing, dick’s not even in yet ‘n yer all addled.”
The dripping head of his cock grinds against your sopping slit as he carries you back to the bedroom. He remembers how much you liked it before – and you still do, your blunt little teeth buried in your bottom lip as you whimper.
It’s still dark, the crescent moon no use to your weak eyes. Like hell you won’t look at him when he finally claims you proper.
He slaps at the wall switch, a tiny lamp flicking to life across the room. You’re bathed in soft golden light, deep shadows swimming where it doesn’t reach. You and him, gold and black, light and dark.
He eagerly lays you out on the blanket, drinking in the marks decorating your upper body. You even have teeth prints on your arm that he doesn’t remember putting there – fetching, though.
You wiggle further up the mattress, and he follows, flashing a grin as he plants his hands on either side of you. The size difference is stark like this, the breadth of him subsuming you. Safe, tucked away, all his. Your breathing is loud as he bullies his way between your plush thighs again. You have to spread them so wide just to accommodate.
“Lemme see,” he says, voice barely leaving his chest. “Lemme see her. It’s been so long, baby.”
He can already tell you’re about to start up the fussing again – so shy, his little bird, but he’ll get you singing nice and loud now. No more of this demure chirping facade. You both know what you really are.
You squeal as he forces your thighs up, far enough apart that you babble that you don’t bend that way. Of course you do, though, you’ve just done it. Not that he really hears you by that point.
No, all his attention is on that gleaming, puffy pussy. So fucking pretty. Sticky and throbbing, your hole hardly showing the stretch of three fingers. Dripping as he watches, a dewy glob of arousal sliding down the seam of your cunt, towards your ass.
Just the slightest shift and his cock is nestled between your folds, the glans chafing against your hot clit. He measures the depth of it against your abdomen, head cloudy on the nervous whine that eeks from your throat.
Even with prep, he might break you anyway.
He hopes he does. Break you around him, shape you to him so that no one else will fit – not that anyone else will ever get the chance.
It’s not a conscious thought that gathers saliva on his tongue, purses his lips. You jump when he spits, rubbing the head of his cock through your combined fluids. Your cunt looks good in white. Like a bride.
You’re too needy, wiggling with nervous anticipation. He has to hold you down while he sinks into you – poor thing too blissed out to control yourself. One hand around your wrists above your head, the other pinning your hips at an angle to drive in as easily as possible.
One snap of his hips, and he’s buried to the hilt. You cry out, shuddering and dry sobbing. His vision goes spotty with the pleasure of it, your little pussy squeezing. You’re so…
“Fucking perfect.”
He shushes you, unable to bend to kiss you without making the stretch worse. Settles for rubbing circles into your hip, twisting to lace your fingers together. Now that he’s finally, finally where he belongs, it doesn’t seem such a monumental task to muster some patience.
“B-big,” you whimper. “You’re t-too big. I d-don’t – I can’t…!”
“You already are,” he coos, “little girl taking this fat cock, I’m so proud. My girl is so brave, my little bird. Bonnie lass.”
He’s rambling now, a dirty stream of consciousness. But that primal urge to fuck you open and loose and stupid is already clawing at him again. The tight clutch of your cunt calls for him to break you in, mark you up on the inside. Claim you as his irrevocably.
You feel him drawing back, eyes flying open wide. Writhing, half-formed protests on your tongue - that you’re not ready, that he’s too big, that it still hurts.
As if that’s any reason to stop, when anything needs to sting a bit to leave a lasting mark.
“Only way to make it hurt less,” he reminds, burying inside again. This time he rolls his hips, grinding the head of his cock along your satiny walls, against the hard barrier of your cervix.
Whatever you’re about to say is swept off in a wave of moans, washing over your wet tongue and down the back of your too-empty throat. Every time you try to gather them, he fucks back into you, hard enough to bounce you up the bed before he tugs you right back down.
Eventually you give up on doing anything but keening for him, massaging his cock from root to tip in those twitching walls. You loop your legs around his waist, ankles locked at the small of his back, knees squeezing against his ribs.
“Tha’s it, love,” he slurs, “jus’ take it.”
He lets your wrists go to clutch at both of your hips, angling them as he straightens his back. On the next thrust you scream, curse, throw your hands up to brace against the headboard. Smart girl.
His restraint unravels with each thrust until he’s pounding into you, slamming the bedframe into the wall. Your eyes are rolling into the back of your skull, jaw loose, spilling pathetic, weepy “ah, ah, ah” noises in time with his hips. He’s not going to last long at all. Not when you feel so goddamn good, finally claimed.
He presses his thumb against your clit and grins wickedly as you thrash. Tears leak from your unfocused eyes. You babble incoherently as he rubs a little rougher than he should, but your walls are sucking and clutching at every centimeter of him, so he doesn’t stop.
Even when you seize up, back bent into a sharp arch, clamping down so tight that he goes lightheaded.
“Soap! John… John it’s too much,” you sob. “John – Johnny!”
His orgasm blindsides him, makes him fuck you so hard that something in the bed cracks. In the haze, he flattens you to the mattress while bucking into you, not taking any chance of coming unseated. You whine in his ear but go limp, resigned to his cock spurting at the entrance to your womb – as deep as he can get – your cunt milking him for every drop.
He comes back to himself when you tap weakly at his hip, uncoordinated.
“Hm?” he asks, a little miffed that you’re disturbing his afterglow already.
“Hard to breathe,” you squeak.
He huffs. Alright, suppose he can understand that. Besides, he wants to see you.
And what a sight you make, splayed out and shaky on pleasure. Sweat at your hairline, lips swollen and bitten. He can still feel your pulse against his cock.
He sits himself up, eyes trailing down to the place where you’re joined. His cum is already seeping out a bit at a time, a thin creamy ring around his still half-hard cock. You keen a bit when it twitches.
“Pretty girl,” he coos.
You groan softly, flopping an arm over your glassy eyes as he pulls out – slow because he’s reluctant to leave.
But the sight of your slick diluting the milky white of his cum is too much to resist. You jolt at the first swipe of his tongue, react much faster than he’s expecting. Flip onto your front and try to scramble away. He growls at his stolen prize and pounces.
Under normal circumstances, you’re no match for him. Trembling and spent like this, you don’t stand a chance.
He grabs your calf and yanks you back, chuckling at the helpless stretch of your arms. You try to plead your case, but he’s hearing none of it. Plants his hand against your back as he shuffles onto his stomach, your thighs over his shoulders, knees digging into muscle. He tilts your hips with his other hand, thumb fitted in the crease of your pelvis, and brings you to his mouth.
Your struggling has made more spend leak out, and he laps it all up hungrily, tongue flat and ravenous. Sweeping from clit to hole to gather any stray droplets, even skimming over the tight furl of your ass. He licks into your loosened hole, high on pride at the difference he can feel his cock has made.
“’S too much,” you wail, “J-Johnny, please. I-I can’t, it’s…”
In retaliation, he slurps loudly at the fresh arousal blooming across his tongue. You hiccup, try one last time to wriggle away. He can’t have that.
You shriek as he fucks two fingers into you, voice thick with a fresh wave of tears. But you stop trying to escape. He doesn’t show mercy now that you’re behaving, coaxing more out, licking around his own knuckles. When he sucks at your overstimulated clit, you jerk and whine.
“I’m – I’m gonna… feels… w-wait, wait!”
It’s too late. He’s already laved his tongue over your trapped clit, crooked his fingers. You cum again with a shout, wetness splashing across his mouth, chin, down his neck. He groans, deep and rough in his chest. Doesn’t even give you a moment to recover before he pulls away, licking his lips.
“Do tha’ again on my cock.”
You’ve learned better now though – you lay there like a good girl as he stuffs you full again. Even better, you keep rewarding him with your soft cries of pleasure.
You really are made for him.
--
He likes the couch you picked. Not very big, but cushy. Besides, the two of you don’t need a lot of room anyway. Not when his lap makes a perfectly good seat for you.
You’ve been quiet all morning – probably still waking up from the coma he fucked you into. Eating babka from his fingers, licking them clean between bites. Docile and sweet, melting against his chest with your face tucked against his collarbone.
“Sore?” he asks.
“Mhmm.”
Your sweet little voice is all hoarse and soft. He’d coo if he didn’t think he’d be pushing his luck with skin so close to your teeth.
“Maybe I’ll massage you later,” he offers, smirking at the grumpy little “hmph” he gets in response.
He encourages you to sip a bit of water before your voice emerges again.
“What happens now?”
He doesn’t pretend to misunderstand the question.
“Now I get the life I’m owed,” he answers. All that fighting, suffering, bleeding, dying – and for what? A hole in his skull and his own goddamn people thinking he’s a monster. Even you, at first. You’ve learned, though. He’s sure of it. The rest can swallow bullets for all he cares.
“What if they come back?” you ask.
He hums. “Might contract with someone. Not opposed to killin’ on principle – just sick of doin’ it to someone else’s tune, aye?”
“Wh-what… what about…”
What about you. Poor thing, afraid Laswell and her ilk will snatch you up and dangle you in front of him again. Or worse – some other sod drooling for a slice of heaven in the pits of hell.
He doesn’t loosen his grip even when you shift a bit – needs to feel you in his hands.
“Got a plan for that, don’ you fret, little bird,” he soothes. “Still got one friend, I think. Jus’ gotta find ‘im.”
You exhale slowly, accept another piece of babka. “We’re stayin’ here, though?” you mumble around the mouthful.
He chuckles. Sweet little thing.
“Worked so hard on the place, might as well. Don’ care so long as I’ve got my bird, aye?”
“Mm.”
“How ‘bout a kitty, eh? Get ya somethin’ to keep ye company when I’m away.”
You swallow audibly. “I wan’ a dog. Big one.”
He chuckles. “’Course ye do. Aye, love, a big fuck-off dog to keep ya safe.”
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