linkstothepath

[jestierabbit]

Sometimes I feel like I’m the only person that wouldn’t care if Jax was an asshole just because he’s an asshole. As much as I love the “deeper meaning” stuff I also do like jerk characters just being that way.

Not everything has to have a secret reasoning, sometimes people are just assholes, and in media it can make things interesting

[sailforvalinor]

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[crystallinestars]

OMG thank you so much for your response 😭 You always answer very kindly and in a detailed manner ahahah it is always fun to read your posts ! For rant, where to begin… I’m straight up typing this on a document so that it’ll be easier to organize gyahahah. I hope the readers do not see this as an assault on certain people, just an exchange of ideas 😁This is like 1250 words, enough for a uni essay, I feel that at some points it may be rather incoherent…

So I guess I will start with the shipping thing ! So when it comes to Kaveh ships, I see that it is like 99% with Alhaitham. I guess it is because of the way the game sets them up. Not only do they live under the same roof but iirc they have extensive voicelines about each other. I won’t deny that they play an important role in each other’s lives! Like back from their Akademiya days when they were still friends and collaborated with each other, and then when they had their falling out, and then Kaveh falls into financial ruin and inevitably ends up turning to his former friend for help (much to his own shame and chagrin). If they’ve known each other for this many years, it is natural that they would have many things to say about each other. 

However, I guess this also opens up the way for BL fans to interpret this in a romantic manner. Ofc they could feel free to ship as they’d like, but just taking into account the ones who are so insistent that any other ship must be wrong, I will detail the following… 

For people who have been in each other’s lives for a long time (I’m thinking 10+ years for these two), it isn’t out of the ordinary to talk about each other. I talk about the people in my close circle a fair amount, same with the people I know. It doesn’t need to imply a secret crush. And regarding their interactions, they often throw shade at each other. This is also interpreted in a romantic manner by many fans. If we look at this in a more positive light, I remember a guy player noting that their kind of interaction is similar to IRL male friendships. Guys dissing or making fun of each other with no deeper meaning to it. Bros being bros kind of thing. But if we look at it critically, I would say that a relationship where they’re arguing all the time… is not ideal. Like a commenter on Reddit said something that stood out to me, that Kaveh just looks so stressed when he’s interacting with Haitham. 😅 Looking at it from this angle, it makes it difficult to romance the two ahahah (not because of a “problematic” aspect but rather because it isn’t fun watching them just constantly arguing and Kaveh being miserable from this). 

To digress a bit, my ideal Kaveh ships would be either Kaveh+Lumine or Kaveh+Nilou. The former because Lumine in his hangout quest helps him a lot, like helping him deal with his past and with many of his issues. Also I like the idea of Kaveh accompanying Lumine during her travels, nice way to keep her company. 😁 And for KavehLou their romantic+artsy personalities and their shared cultural connection!!! I feel like Kaveh would legit treat Nilou like a goddess ahahah and Nilou would definitely cheer him up when he’s struggling, and both of them have super good vibes so it’s 💯 green flags all around. I also want to see them celebrate Nowruz together��� ahahah. 

And this kind of ties into my next point that because of the whole shippy thing, Kaveh is rarely seen as his own character. This is evident when you look up his name on Twitter. Most of it will be him with Haitham; the fandom treats him like he is Haitham’s add-on. For comparison, when I look up my other fave Scaramouche/Wanderer, I actually get art of JUST him. Not with Kazuha, Childe, or even Lumine. Just straight up Scara. Kaveh doesn’t get this solo treatment because much of the fandom just sees him as an extension of Haitham. The thing is that Kaveh is one of the most human and relatable characters in the game: he wants to be a good person, yet he does struggle with having his own personality flaws. He has financial struggles that he’s barely clawing his way out of. If we disregard his genius and extraordinary academic record, I think most people could see themselves in him. In other words, I’d say that he is a very solid character. I think it’s about high time we give him his own chance to shine, without feeble scholar getting in his way ahahah (no shade to you, Alhaitham !). Let Kaveh be his own person!

And another point I would like to make, it is something that is of interest to me because it does involve different cultural perspectives. Kaveh is commonly interpreted as “feminine.” There is no shame in being a feminine man. However, the basis of this interpretation is 1) his appearance and 2) his expressive behavior. Regarding his appearance, I think it is because he styles himself in a particular manner that people automatically assume he is “___-coded.” To address this, I’ve seen Iranian Genshin players explain that historically, it wasn’t uncommon for Iranian men to wear jewelry, dress flamboyantly, and enjoy the fine arts. But to outsiders’ eyes, doing these makes him “less of a man.” It is like how some male k-pop idols are seen as “girly” or even “gay” by many in the West, but for women in many east+southeast Asian societies they are perfectly acceptable men. Just that when they see him as “feminine” it often verges into fetishization territory… I’ll try not to play pixel activism here, but ngl it gets really gross and weird at times. A few weeks ago I had the misfortune of laying my eyes upon a Haitham+Kaveh fanart where Kaveh was basically (sorry for the description in advance) Haitham’s belly dancer/slave?? Of course fanartists have the freedom to draw whatever they want but this image was pretty much a symptom of how the fandom views Kaveh. 🙁 Even one of the well-known Iranian Genshin enjoyers called this out as fetishistic and orientalist (the latter term is often thrown around with regard to Sumeru, but I think that this instance actually warranted its use). 

In addition to his appearance, Kaveh is a very emotionally expressive man. He wears his heart on his sleeve. Because of this, this further contributes to fans thinking of him as “girly.” So I guess men aren’t “real men” if they are open with their emotions, if we go by the logic of the fandom? Haitham and other characters seen as “masculine” e.g. Diluc and Childe are given the “masculine” treatment because they demonstrate far more restraint with their emotions, while Kaveh gets the “uwu I’m a lil bbygirl in need of saving” treatment simply because he doesn’t hold back when it comes to his feelings. So from this there’s like so much stuff of him as “ohhh submissive prettyboy 🥺🥺🥺” instead of taking into account other aspects of his personality, like he could actually be assertive especially when dealing with annoying clients. It does him a true disservice…

I feel that I’m missing many more points that I’ve considered before, if I ever remember them I will probably send them in… I hope it does not come off as some sort of crusade call, but rather just an outpouring of thoughts. And hopefully this is a decently entertaining read ^^;;;;

WELCOME BACK!!! I have been waiting for your lovely essay on how Kaveh gets done dirty by the fandom, and it made me so happy to see you and I share a lot of opinions in common on this! (That's a lot of text though. I don't mind the length at all, but I'm surprised the word limit let you hahaha)

To your amazing analysis, I respond to you with an essay of my own.

I completely agree with your points that people who have known each other for a long time would naturally have a lot to say about each other. Even if they haven't known each other for long, when people live in close quarters together, they definitely have things to say about one another, especially negative ones. The bickering Kaveh and Alhaitham have is expected since they're roommates, and on top of that, roommates that had a falling out as friends. Their relationship is a bit strained since neither wants to admit they were wrong in the past due to their pride.

I work 5 days a week with a coworker of mine, and I have a lot to say about her because we work closely together. Does that mean I'm romantically attracted to her? No, not at all. Quite the opposite. Unfortunately, this logic doesn't apply to fiction quite so easily, and I'll cover why in a bit.

The point about them acting like real-life guy friends is also very true, although I think their relationship fits a sitcom more closely. I know someone who said Kaveh and Haitham's relationship reminds them of Leonard and Sheldon's from The Big Bang Theory. Two guys living together, constantly bickering and throwing shade, but caring about one another deep down.

Lord, I can write a whole separate essay on why I think Kaveh and Alhaitham don't work as a romantic couple, but I won't do that here. This post is already gonna be long. Maybe another time.

However, I do want to say that while you make excellent points on how Kaveh and Haitham's relationship isn't inherently romantic, there is a very big BUT to all this. And that's Mihoyo.

As an anime game developer, Mihoyo knows all about the anime community. After all, the founders were all otakus, they know what kind of audience they have. They know what is popular, and what's popular is BL. There is not a single excuse anyone can give me that can convince me otherwise that Mihoyo didn't know exactly what they were doing when they wrote Kaveh and Haitham to be roommates. They didn't have to write them to live together. They didn't have to write all the extra dialogue where they mention each other. They didn't have to do the matching key idles, the references to the other in their birthdays, or introduce Kaveh through Alhaitham TWICE. They knew how their audience will interpret their dynamic, they had the option to structure it differently, but they still went through with it. It was deliberate.

Kaveh was introduced with Haitham, and ever since, they have consistently been shown together. It's as if they are literally glued to each other. Can't go a single birthday, event, quest, or otherwise without the other being present in some way. It is all intentional. Their interactions and cameos carry intent behind them that shippers pick up on, and that intent is to appeal to their group. So while it's erroneous to claim that Kaveh and Haitham are canonically in a romantic relationship the way a lot of toxic shippers are doing, there is a good reason why they think so. Mihoyo is actively encouraging this mindset by not allowing either character to shine on their own, but rather as a pair because they know this appeals to a subsection of their fanbase, and a large one at that.

As for your Kaveh ships, I agree 100%! Lumine is a good choice for sure (I say this as a kavelumi shipper *gets shot*), and while I don't ship it, I understand the reasoning behind Kavelou, and think it's cute. Nilou would be a really good influence on Kaveh. He always laments about how nobody understands his passion for the arts, but Nilou would. They're both artists that are trying to eke their own path in a society that doesn't appreciate art. Nilou, as you mentioned, would cheer him up, and I think Kaveh would also find peace of mind through her dancing. Kaveh needs someone optimistic and kind like Nilou.

While we're on the topic of Kaveh ships, I would also like to suggest my own that I really like. Kaveh x Candace. Please don't shoot me. Candace is strict and no-nonsense, so she wouldn't let Kaveh get away with constantly self-sabotaging himself. And unlike Haitham, she is gentle and almost motherly, so she'd be more successful in getting through to Kaveh and soothing him. Or so I like to think. Kaveh would also help her see the outside world more, maybe have her accompany him through the desert and show her beautiful sights she'd never see by staying cooped up in her village. Plus, he's literally helping to construct a library for her village! There is so much potential for them to bond over Aaru village yet Hoyo keeps pushing the same relationships, I am so tired-

But of course, for me, the best ship of all will forever be Kaveh x You/Reader. On my blog, every guy I write for loves you, and only you. Please don't kill me.

Carrying on, you are right in that Kaveh isn't seen as his own person. You'd be hard-pressed to find (popular) art of him that doesn't imply Haitham in there somewhere. Is it so surprising, though, when even the game developer treats them as a package deal?

I feel you, it's a pity. Kaveh's character is very complex and one of the most realistic. When I read his backstory, I couldn't help but think as if someone in Mihoyo put a part of themselves in his character. The struggles he goes through are realistic, painfully so, even. I've also seen lots of artists say they relate to Kaveh. He has so much to explore about him, but I fear that outside of the Darshan event and his hangout, we'll never get to see more.

Okay, so. I have mentioned before on this blog how I am annoyed at how Kaveh is viewed as feminine and submissive due to his appearance and emotional nature. You've already touched on all the points, so excuse me for sounding like a broken record, but I have A LOT to say about this.

There is nothing wrong with being feminine. There is nothing wrong with being a feminine man. What is wrong, however, is associating femininity with submission.

Kaveh has traits that are often associated with femininity, which, as you pointed out, are his neat and pretty looks and emotional expressiveness (the bit about Iranian men traditionally wearing jewelry is super interesting, btw. I didn't know, so this was enlightening!). To this, I also want to add that lots of people think he acts like a nagging wife with Alhaitham. That's basically all it takes for people to slap him with the "feminine" label, and treat him as if he's a submissive, blushy, uwu bbgurl I want to delete this term from existence

I know that men the West views as "feminine/girly" are often popular among women in Asia, and it really just comes down to culture and a matter of taste. I share their taste in men because I also find K-Pop idols and smooth-faced, slim anime guys more attractive than muscular and rugged men, and by no means do I think they're girly. But alas, each culture has expectations for how men and women are supposed to look and act, and it's led to more harm than good.

It's also unfortunate that Kaveh gets compared to Alhaitham a lot. Alhaitham is what one would call traditionally masculine. Muscular, stoic, reserved, aloof, etc... But especially the muscular part. Kaveh isn't muscular, and as we saw in the Darshan event, isn't athletic. This difference in physique is also a reason people call him feminine. I saw someone say (in a shipping context) that they prefer Kaveh to be submissive because Alhaitham is taller and bigger than him. Nothing wrong with wanting a sub Kaveh, but I find this reasoning very flawed. Fetishistic, if you will.

And yes, the "one man is a dom/top while the other is a sub/bottom" mentality follows a lot of BL ships. People literally fight with each other over who they believe should be the top or bottom. There are even specific emojis for it. Don't know why people are so hung up about who tops or who bottoms, but what do I know. I don't understand the appeal of BL at all 🫤

Gosh, I'm sorry you had to see that belly dancer art... I once saw a ship art where Kaveh wore a wedding dress while Haitham wore a suit. It wasn't a silly context, either, but a serious and romantic one. I really dislike seeing art of Kaveh being feminine or acting submissive because that's not him at all.

Please look at this official art. Look at how Kaveh casually stuffs his hand in his pocket, at how he sits with his legs spread wide without a care in the world, at how he slings Mehrak over his shoulder. Look at how confidently and casually he carries himself. His body language screams "masculine".

Kaveh is confident, prideful, assertive, bold... I could go on. These are also traits usually associated with men. I mean, look at how he talks about one of his seniors in his hangout!

He's got quite the mouth and a temper.

He's not shy, far from it, actually. He's not submissive. He's not a dainty damsel in distress than needs someone stronger to help him, because in actuality, he's resourceful and intelligent.

Kaveh is self-assured in his masculinity. Sure, he's not a big, buff man, and he wears his heart on his sleeve, but that doesn't make him less of a man or weak. Maybe physically a bit, but I don't think he's below average in terms of strength. He makes up for it with his smarts and invents things to circumvent his shortcomings. This part of him gets overlooked, because he gets compared to Alhaitham. It doesn't help that the two are always seen together lately.

In my humble opinion, Kaveh is more of a dom than Alhaitham will ever be. Haitham gives me vibes of being someone who's too lazy to put in the work in bed, so he'd rather lie back and let his partner lead. Meanwhile, Kaveh isn't afraid to go after what he wants, and will pamper his partner.

In conclusion, you are very right about everything. If Mihoyo wasn't purposely throwing ship crumbs at every opportunity, then Kaveh potentially wouldn't have had his character assassinated by the fandom. Every character gets mischaracterized to some degree (I weep for Childe), but unlike most, Kaveh's mischaracterization is largely in part due to shipping.

Apologies for the massive tangent. I had a lot of fun reading your analysis and mentally screaming "YES! YES! SHE GETS IT! I'm not the only one!", so thank you for sending this in. Don't worry, it was very well put-together, probably better than my rambling. I found out some new points, and had a few of mine validated, so feel free to send another essay if you think of more things. I love deep and thoughtful discussions like these haha!

[topbottomswitchblade]

Do you have any tips for shaking learned guilt in kink spaces? I want to be more open for people but I struggle with the thoughtcop for lack of better terms

You don’t have to answer this if it’s too much <_<;

I don’t know that I’m going to have the best advice bc what helps is going to vary from person to person, but for me it was just kind of recognizing

almost everyone has sex. it’s normal. it’s common. finding out that someone is a sex-haver is not a shocking revelation.

sex is just A Thing You Can Do. it doesn’t have to be a big deal. someone put it well in that it’s like going to dinner - it can be intimate and romantic or it can be casual with friends. you’re not going on a hero’s journey from which you can never return unchanged

bodies are weird but they’re all weird. everybody has a body and none of them are pristine.

brains are also weird. sometimes you like stuff in the land of make believe that wouldn’t fly in real life, but that’s ok bc kink scenes are just games of pretend. it’s like horror movies. no one is actually killing or dying. the writer and the actors are not viewed as bad or dangerous people irl. nor are horror movie fans for enjoying watching.

if everyone is having a good time and no one is getting hurt then it’s all good. well, i mean, no one is getting hurt in ways they don’t want to be. if they want to be hurt and are having fun then hey they’re having fun.

it’s ok to be particular about your likes and dislikes because we all like and dislike different things and we’re not in control of that

ppl who have done research and/or soul searching feel free to add on with more helpful input

[ciaossu-imagines]

Hi ! I'm really enjoying your blog, i'm kind of amazed at how much you're able to write !

I'm super happy to see you writing for K tbh !

Love all about it ^^

Soo, um- first ask from me !

(I don't need to say it maybe but take your time, irl first then the rest can follow)

I was wondering how Kusanagi would try to date a friend he has known for some years, without any kind of romantic feelings between them before-

And.. his crush possibly is kind of avoiding him because they're overhelmed-

(They have dated only one person before)

But they want to date him

And in the end they do end up dating ^^

(I know it's a bit specific djjdjdjjdkd)

Thank you so much in advance ^^

Take care !

((Idk how to end this message))

You're great !

I’m so glad to hear you’re enjoying the blog, my dear! Thank you so much for the compliments and for sending in the request! Specific is good, so don’t even worry about that. The more specific an ask, the easier it is to know what exactly to write. Thanks again for sending this in and I hope you’ll enjoy the headcanons 😊

Okay, so just playing this scenario out in my head, I feel this old friend of Kusanagi’s is someone he would have met during his school years, possibly high school or even university, though I lean more towards them having met in high school.

I know you said there’s been no romantic feelings between them before, but I can’t really see that entirely. I feel like this was a situation where Kusanagi would have had a silent crush on them during a time when they didn’t feel the same way towards him at all, so he did nothing to act on it. And they probably had a couple times where they kind of developed a little crush on him, but at that point, he wasn’t into them at all or was in another relationship, so his friend never acted on those feelings and did their best to get over it. It was a case of timing never matching up and really, to the both of them, their friendship was the main priority. While Kusanagi is charming and charismatic and does draw people to him, does make lots of friendly acquaintances, he makes very few true friends so when he does, those friendships do mean something to him.

While the both of them would have had feelings during their school years, just at different times, when Kusanagi went to university, which I feel he did abroad and at a really prestigious school, the both of them really did figure that it was never going to happen between them and both of them really set those feelings aside and worked past them. His friend got into their one relationship they’ve had, and as we all know Kusanagi has somewhat of a reputation as a womanizer.

Now, Kusanagi is someone who is really naturally very flirtatious. He doesn’t even mean anything by it, doesn’t actually have romantic intentions or even strong attractions to some of the people he flirts with. Flirting is just really fun to him; it’s amusing and enjoyable. And it’s likely that he’ll playfully flirt with his friend, and they’ve gotten so used to it and really don’t think he means anything by it.

And that’s before he even experiences those romantic feelings and that crush on his friend return.

It works against him in a way. When he does realize he’s seeing his friend as someone he wants to date, someone he seriously wants to be with, it’s going to take him a little bit to really process those feelings. He has to decide if he wants to potentially ruin that friendship, he has to decide if he feels they’re at all into him in return. And part of how he’s always learned to figure that out is by flirting. So, he’s flirting more with that friend than before, taking it to a new level than his previous flirting. He’ll tease them about how, when they’re out doing things and hanging out, how much fun he’s having on their ‘dates’. And because his friend is so used to him being a flirt and having that penchant for teasing someone because it amuses him, they’re not making anything of it. They don’t assume it means he’s into them.

But it does bother them on some level, because they’re also starting to feel that resurgence of their old crush on him. The flirting makes them feel so nice, but at the same time, it kind of hurts them in a way because they really want him to be saying those things to them seriously and instead they’re certain that he’s just being his usual playful self and isn’t into them at all.

It’s kind of a lot for his friend, honestly. They’re dealing with all these emotions and because Kusanagi is trying a little more seriously this time to act on his feelings, he’s being more flirty, he gives more compliments, he starts touching them more, starts taking them out more one on one or asking them on ‘dates’ and they take it as him playing around and it fucks with their mind and their feelings and so they start to avoid him a little, which makes Kusanagi assume they’re not into him at all, even when they are.

It’s not going to be a quick solution or an easy one. Kusanagi has some stubbornness to him, he’s not easily going to cave and admit feeling the way he does towards someone who is giving him all these signs that they’re not at all into him. And his friend is really struggling with their own feelings and it’s going to be a little waiting game to see who makes that next move and it really is going to have to be Kusanagi’s friend, even in subtle ways.

If they start giving him hints that they might be experiencing the same romantic intentions, that’s really all he needs because without them giving him some kind of hint as to their feeling, some positive reactions to his putting out feelers, it’s really going to go back to those ‘well, they don’t feel the same, time to finally get over this and just go back to being friends’.

If there’s enough positive reactions to both of them subtly flirting and feeling each other out, to low-key dating each other, then I can see there being that surety that will let Kusanagi have that conversation that confirms that they’re a couple and exclusive.

[faceyourphobia]

You know, I really just realized this, but…

Having different pronouns doesn’t make you trans. It’s actively wanting to be a different sex than whatever you were at birth. I mean, sure, the urges don’t have to be strong or whatever, but that’s pretty much the whole definition.

(Personal-ish info below cut)

(Cw: mentions of slurs, irl problems-ish)

So now, now I’ve also just realized that…

That this “trans” friend of mine, isn’t actually trans. They have no desire to change their sex. They have none, they literally told me this when I asked. They just use all pronouns because they don’t care what they’re referred to as.

The problem with this is that, that person actively uses the trans slur, and on many occasions has called me one. Okay dude. I don’t care whether you didn’t know or not anymore, because you should’ve done your research before openly saying that kind of stuff.

And the homo slur. It literally doesn’t apply to me. And it has its repercussions because this other person in our person group thinks I’m gay, and has been trying to hit on me pretty much the day we met. Like… This is not fun. At all.

[pagegirlintraining]

For the ask game:

♡ SMALL THINGS: pick a fic and I’ll tell you my favorite minor detail from it! (for DTL)

★ what was the scene you most wanted to write in [fic]? what was the hardest scene to write? (for OEAS)

✎ how do you think readers would guess a fic was yours if you posted anonymously?

Also that new profile pic is just rude and I love it.

Oooh, fun. Okay so a minor detail I love about DTL is the fact that I made Petra Mede host it and then got to fangirl when I realized in the middle of the ESC dress rehearsal (which she also hosted irl) that she was the person from my fic 😂 as for a more story related detail, it’s probably that I have Felice referring to Simon as “tiny dancer” at one point. It’s one of my all time favorite songs and fits so well at the same time. I just love sneaking little references like this in there 🥹

What was the scene you most wanted to write in OEAS:

100% the scene where they just got home from Wille’s gig and Wille tells Simon more about Erik and why he loves making music so much. The image of them listening to Wille’s favorite song with Simon curled up to Wille’s chest is what started that whole story. I particularly love how this part turned out:

“That’s beautiful, Wille.”

A huff and a shaky smile were Wille’s immediate reply. “You think so? It doesn’t just sound like a little rich boy trying to be poetic?”

“On second thought…”

That got a more steady, genuine chuckle out of Wille. “I had to go and ruin it, didn’t I?”

Simon joined in with his quiet laughter for a moment, then he shifted his expression back into something more serious and gave a shake of his head. “You didn’t ruin anything.”

And the way Wille’s face softened at that looked so unfairly pretty, and really, who was Simon kidding here? He wanted to kiss him. He wanted nothing more than to kiss him, gently and sweetly and with no ulterior motive but to comfort. To show his appreciation for Wille’s trust, his honesty. To make him feel the things Simon himself was still too stubborn to put into words. So he did.

What was the hardest scene to write for OEAS?

Probably the confrontational scene where Simon wants to finally confess his feelings and doesn’t know Wille has overheard him and Henry the other day.

“I wrote you a song!”

The sudden exclamation was caused by the sheer desperation Simon felt climbing up his insides, but either way, it got Wille to stop. When he slowly turned around, he’d finally taken off his sunglasses. And the look he fixed Simon with out of puffy, red-rimmed eyes was unlike anything he’d ever seen on him. There was sadness there, pain, betrayal. But above all, there was a deep, dizzying anger.

“I don’t know what kind of game you’re trying to play here, I really don’t,” he said, voice almost dangerously quiet as he slowly stepped toward Simon. “I get it, I should’ve believed you when you said we were just hooking up, that it didn’t change anything. That’s on me. But this? This is…cruel.”

Miscommunication is surprisingly hard for me to write, mostly because I want to shake them the whole time because they’re being stupid. I mean, come on, Wille! You just need to listen for two minutes and it’ll all be fine🙈

And finally, how do you think readers would guess a fic was yours if you posted anonymously ?

Well first of, anything dance related or using (especially Swedish) song lyrics as plot devices might tip people off 😂 if we’re talking more about style of writing though, I blatantly overuse the word “utterly”. I just love it so much, the sound of it, the gravitas it holds… and now I kinda hate that I’m shining a spotlight on it because I’m a bit scared it’ll feel out of place now. But hey, I’ve already typed all this and it is a really great word so…

Thank you so much for the great ask, Jo 💜 and that whole entire weekend was rude and I loved it so much

Feel free to send me more of these asks, the list is here.

[furvillaconfessions]

op of post/726861706943447040

hi it's me again, thanks for humoring me! i understand how it seemed like bait, but i genuinely wasn't trying to bait anyone. as for my proshipping friend, they're not into pedophilia/zoophilia/etc. problematic content, they hate it too, they just believe in the freedom of shipping others... as in, they wouldn't harass someone for shipping something problematic. they wouldn't really condone it, but they wouldn't attack the person just for their ship. they also believe in people being allowed to write/draw/etc. about whatever they want as long as it's tagged properly and they keep it strictly fictional. "dead dove do not eat" kind of thing, if you know what that is? they don't mind seeing that sort of content (and have even read some stories like that too) but it doesn't mean they support it. they consume it critically, as they say.

as for why i'm friends with them, it's just that i'm old enough to remember the times when people didn't instantly refuse to be friends with someone over whether they're pro/antiship. we've been friends for a really long time and it was only later they told me they consider themselves a proshipper and i know them well enough to be able to trust them. still, if it turns out they're into problematic content (pedophilia/zoophilia/etc.) and don't see anything wrong with it (and would maybe want that irl too), that's when i'll try knocking some sense into them and if it doesn't work, well, it was a fun friendship while it lasted. i don't mind proshippers who are chill, but the moment they turn into genuine creeps is when enough is enough.

sorry for rambling! also sorry i brought the shipping thing here for a bit, i don't think i'll talk about this any further. thank you again!

[genderisareligion]

My apologies if you have already given the answer to this before, but may I ask, do you still acquaint yourself with libfems? Why or why not?

It has always been my personal belief that in order to properly fight a battle, you must understand the arguments of all sides, but at this point I’ve grown so tired of the sheer stupidity of liberal feminism and anti feminists that I don’t think I can deal anymore. I feel bad for saying this, but in my head I can’t help but say that these people are either just stupid or being willfully obtuse! What do you mean hyperfemininity fights the patriarchy? It fucking doesn’t, not in any way! What do you mean women are too stupid to take on leadership positions, but are also somehow the masterminds behind every single fucking problem on the planet? What is wrong with these people? I don’t even consider myself particularly intelligent, but this is just utter insanity. It actually blows my mind… the arguments that the hyperfeminine genderspecial American girls in my age range throw around. None of them make sense, all of them are easily disqualified, so why does no one seem to get it still?

I went a bit off track here… I guess the question I really want to ask is, do you believe that it’s better if I still welcome my libfem acquaintances, or should I leave all of them behind? I’d stuck around in hopes that they would someday have a better understanding of how deep the patriarchy is rooted, but they’re still parroting “Trans women are women! We love girlcock!” and I just don’t know if I can take it anymore.

It's up to you whether or not to leave them behind. Solidarity with other women while agreeing to disagree is important, but can be very difficult to accomplish. You as a radical or radleaning feminist don't owe American hyperfeminine genderspecial women anything, and the worse that I see anti radfem scare tactics and lies getting over the years, the less I blame those who feel they can't take anymore.

I personally don't know many libfems anymore but I did in college; for example I could and can tolerate some level of "makeup and trendy fashion is feminist and fun for me" from friends because it's so fucking rough out here for women and real feminism is becoming so inaccessible that I'm just like "well at least they're somewhat enjoying themselves even if those actions aren't feminist," it's usually never worth it to me to try and change her mind unless she simultaneously expresses discomfort with beauty standards

My closest female friend for the longest I would say is just a general feminist, too normie and not committed to it enough to be considered liberal or radical, but believes in its most basic tenets and doesn't shy away from the word feminist. She's let me rant to her about radfem for over a decade and usually understands my point even if she doesn't 100% agree.

Those are the kinds of women I still have time for...I'm in my 30s so the genderspecial "you can be trans with no dysphoria! twaw!" free for all is like that much more concerning when I see it in my age group. Basically IRL I'm a stealth radfem unless I think someone will be open to it.

Do what's going to keep you the most sane out here

[bluedalahorse]

One time, almost a decade ago, one of my friends got married. During the reception the rest of my friends and I were all hanging out at our designated table and having a good time, and my friend’s new husband came by our table and told us he needed to have a serious talk with us.

What he said was: that he and my friend who married him were happy together, and yes they were married now, but they still needed the other relationships in their lives. That their friends still mattered to them. And he wanted us to promise we would still come and see my friend and invite her to things and generally hang out with her as before, because he knew she needed all of us.

It was a very genuine moment, not performative. And it was so helpful to me as an aromantic, because our general cultural atmosphere pushes so much the idea that a monogamous romantic partnership that lasts forever is the highest and most important kind of love. I spent a lot of my 20s worried that I wold gradually become less important to people and lose all of my close friends as they paired off. Thankfully, that hasn’t happened. But I know a lot of people who’ve had that fear, or who still struggle with it.

Anyway, not to drag this back to fiction and fandoms on main, but this is why I want to push back against amatonormativity in things like ‘shipping and romance stories. That doesn’t always mean pushing back against ‘shipping and romance stories period; I’m an aroace fan who likes my ‘ships and romances and even kissing and sex scenes in fiction. (The idea of feeling the butterflies IRL is absolute horror to me, but it’s kind of fun when you get to inhabit a fictional character’s head for a while and see how they experience it.)

What it does mean, for me, to push back against amatonormativity in these spaces, is that I wanna see romantic stories where even if the romance is foregrounded, you know that the character’s platonic relationships are important—sometimes just as important—to them. Where it’s seen as a positive sign when the potential partner clicks with the best friend and they respect one another. When someone goes out of their way to connect with a potential partner’s close sibling or other significant family member. I also think it’s really important that these platonic connection characters feel like real, three-dimensional people, and react to the main romantic relationship in a range of ways—and not just in a way that involves bland cheerleading for the One True Pairing. When someone close to you enters a serious relationship, there is always an adjustment period as you figure out how to work this new person into your life. And this integration process isn’t always linear, either. Sometimes serious conflicts can arise. It takes time and communication!

To wrap up, this is why I find most fic and fiction scenarios where it’s only the main couple, only having eyes on one another, being very singly focused on one another, and very few secondary characters feel fully realized in the story, and everyone who is Good among the supporting characters automatically cheers the OTP on and if they don’t that’s a sign of Evil… well, it all feels a bit bleak to me. Like yes I want to read the snuggle scenes and the grand declarations of love but I also want the moment where the partner meets the friend group for the first time and accidentally expresses a controversial opinion about whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza. I want the more serious moment where the potential partner cares for the protagonist’s close sibling and the protagonist goes yep I can trust that person they’re for me. I also want people to have to work through the difficult stuff, too. There’s story potential in that.

Tl;dr even if platonic relationships are not foregrounded in a piece of fiction, they should still matter. I’m glad I’ve been able to find more writers recently who do a good job with that. And I will always take more recommendations (especially fanfic-wise) for authors who do that well!

[azurenightowl]

Notes on the show Gravity Falls,

written by someone who didn’t watch the show until 2023 but was in the fandom through osmosis because of mutuals and irl friends who watched it. Binged it in a week.

damn it really do live up to the hype

pacifica is a way smaller part of the show than i realised, and candy and grenda have a way larger presence. (not to be like. annoying but. i wonder why the rich white girl is prioritised over the asian girl and the trans-coded girl. hmm. forget the author, this is the real mystery.)

the mystery and romance elements are actually pretty much equally balanced. there’s more romance than i realised; then again, i guess bingeing the show and already knowing the big mysteries (stanford, who is bill, what is his plan, etc.) means that the mystery element seems much smaller because there’s nothing to guess, only evidence that confirms what i know as fact.

i love that emotionally speaking, everyone’s arcs are complete, but there are still some mysteries left hanging. like the axolotl. whats up with that guy?

i kept waiting for the other shoe to drop regarding mabel, but she’s just like… a really optimistic positive person? like she can be annoying but she’s not evil or self-serving or unnecessarily selfish.

compared to dipper, the show is "nicer" to her in that she has less episodes where we focus on one of her personal problems like we do dipper, so her flaws are less explored. this makes her less interesting, and so potentially people go looking for flaws in other places?

most of the times where she’s shown to be concerned about boys over dipper’s problems (eg sock opera) she has like, half a second of deliberation before she does the right thing. she’s 12! and a lot of the time doesn’t have the same information as the viewer does, hence doesn’t have the same sense of urgency.

i kind of get the frustration, especially about the finale and the end of episode 17; personally i think it’s wrong of mabel to ask dipper not to take the opportunity, because adulthood and planning for it is important, as well as following your passion. dipper made the right choice for him (in that moment), and was explicit about still being in contact with mabel. 

HOWEVER mabel is totally entitled to feeling hurt and upset about this! and she was preyed upon by a monster in a moment of weakness; it is a little bit selfish, and a little bit naive, yes, to want summer to last forever. but these are normal, human traits. 

also, it’s very important that she didn’t even know what the snowglobe was when she gave it to ‘blendin.’ she was emotionally distraught and was told that a small trinket no one would miss could make her happy and prevent what she saw as a disastrous future. no one told her—granted she didn’t seek the knowledge out either. no one is at fault for her not knowing the value of the snowglobe.

i really love the depth of the show’s world. by which i mean; we don’t get to see everything. i’ve seen many instances where you see everything, except one thing called "the incident" thats inevitably a recurring joke. here, we get references to a bunch of stuff that never appears onscreen—mabel’s encounters with vampires, dipper fighting a demon bat, the family bonding day that ended with a night in county jail. you get the impression that the characters have rich and full lives outside of this.

this show is SO funny. like—

s2e6, that crack about animators and the fact that they can’t afford stop-motion.

s2e12, talking about the in-universe show they’re watching, there’s a twist where the main character has an identical twin and the characters voice different opinions the writers predict the fandom will have: from "bullshit" to "i predicted that a year ago."

s2e16, stan says "do i look like an amnesiac?" LMAO. i mean not funny but like such fun foreshadowing played off as a joke. 

i got TOTALLY misled about what bill’s personality was like, and i’m so, so pleased. i cannot explain how cool show!bill is. i thought he was--well standard tumblr sexyman. suave and dapper and whatnot.

bill doesn’t actually have that much screen time, but he has so much presence from the triangles everywhere to the effect he has on the characters—and then, you know, the whole finale. but im thinking, especially early on before he’s a named character, the fact that he’s present is really ominous, especially for someone who doesn’t actually know what happens in the show, only that he shows up at some point and starts the apocalypse.

bill just doesn’t care about dipper basically at all and it’s great! you can construct an argument that he cares (in a really fucked up way) for ford, paying him special attention and having spent a lot of time building the portal. mabel, too—the deal they make, he gives her the nicest prison, he didn’t have to, you know? in-show, based on how worried ford+stan are than bill won’t honour his deal to leave the kids alone, you learn he’s not actually bound by the deal. also when he possessed dipper and straight gave him nothing in return. but yeah bill is just off doing his own thing and you really get a sense that he's above all of this. everyone is a pawn to him, he just wants to party!

im getting off track. in all honesty, bill straight doesn’t care for anyone except himself and it’s amazing. no creeping on the 12 year olds—based off fanart i thought there was some sort of rapey vibes, but nope he’s just here to have fun and cause chaos. 10/10.

all in all, even knowing the big mysteries, this was a blast. for people who feel like they won’t enjoy the show because it’s been spoiled, definitely check it out anyway.

[theharrowing]

Hey you amazing author

So I’ve a random question for you.

Do you think fiction reading as a boundary? Or are we allowed to read ANYTHING? Like is there an unspoken rule where the line is? Because I see many people advice that FICTION ≠ REALITY, have seen some of my favorite authors on ao3 write some of the most taboo and depraved topics and let me tell you these fics have alot of hits.

So always wondering if as long as you’re not partaking in these things and reading them just as they’re, fictional characters… should you be indulged in everything you wish to read? Sorry my English sucks and this questions is getting long because I’m not able to sum it up and make it sound like I mean it in my head 😫

hey you amazing anon!🙂

i think this question has a complicated answer that varies person to person, and story to story. your English is great, and i am probably going to struggle to put my thoughts together so apologies in advance if this is long. this is long so i put it under the cut! 🥰

at least, for me, i can read almost anything. there are topics i don’t touch (sexualization of minors, incest between people who are blood relatives) that i do see people writing, and there are topics that i will read and write and even enjoy that i know are not for everyone (gore and graphic violence, yandere, some non-con, etc.)

my personal enjoyment of darker topics does not come from an urge to do these things in real life, so there is no romanticization for me. it’s just the thrill of making believe for a bit. but there are people who do enjoy/want these things irl (and i think it is pretty obvious in their writing, but i can’t really put my finger on explaining why or what it is tbh) and i think that’s where the boundary lines kind of blur and fantasy can have potential to become a little dangerous? but i don’t know, really. i don’t study the sociology of it, and i don’t really have any substantiated ideas or theories haha.

but to answer your question, i think we all make our own boundaries and have to kind of figure out where they are. and they can change over time, or be grey at times (i have been told by people that i am one of the only authors whose darker works they read, etc.) i believe that, as long as you feel safe interacting with certain content and it doesn’t feed some dark, horrible urge inside you, then you should be free to consume whatever. and if you find some content is not for you and it makes you upset, then you should feel free to stop! (but do so silently! telling someone their art has upset you is not really a helpful thing for anyone tbh.)

that’s kind of the beauty of art…..we can put anything into the universe and have it be received and understood. and sometimes it’s hated lmao. you don’t really know until you try. as long as it is understood as fiction. yes, there are things i write that i would enjoy actually doing/having been done to me, but there is plenty that i do not want lol. i think it is fun and cool to explore in a way that makes us feel safe, understanding that our boundaries are not always going to be the same as others.

which is why warnings are important! i have been trying to get better at being very explicitly clear about my warnings bc some people don’t like surprises. 😅

I HOPE THIS HELPS!!! sorry it’s a very long answer. i feel like it’s still lacking tons on nuance but i can only speak from my experiences and those i have observed.

[scary-senpai]

Can you explain garou x saitama? I really don’t see it but I’d like to know your opinion.

Haha, oh my goodness, this was such a lovely ask to get <3 I’m honestly excited to respond (and maybe a little nervous, haha). So, thank you again, beloved nonny, for asking with an open mind. :D

As I mentioned, I’m a bit nervous because the answer is likely weirder than you expect, and that’s because it’s kind of a personal answer? And I (IRL) also tend to be a lot weirder than most people expect. But when it comes to writing, that’s generally the sweet spot, so here goes nothing.

So, I tagged it as Platonic! Garou & Saitama** meaning it’s not romantic or sexual, at least, not in the traditional sense. I could talk for days about what I find appealing--I answered a similar ask on my main blog a few years ago, and my answer is still the same.

** actually I used “x” rather than “&” and in retrospect, I’m not sure if that’s correct. I’ll have to look into it more. But anyway, Garou and Saitama are foils: they have overcome similar obstacles, they grapple with similar despairs—including overwhelmingly strong emotions and/or the perceived absence of them, which is just as conspicuous and painful. I can’t help but feel if their journeys towards physical strength stem from the same place, which is that they are running from questions they don’t want to answer, and parts of themselves they’d rather avoid.

On a lighter note, though, they’re both a little goofy—I like to imagine they communicate almost exclusively in Dad jokes, and I have one scene drafted where they manage to derail a Hero Association meeting this way. You’ll find a lot of stuff under the brotp and sometimes OT3 tag, but more on that later.

In any case, I think that Garou & Saitama’s goofiness stems from the same place: time spent dwelling in dark places. I had a different reaction to That One Panel Where Saitama Threatens to Destroy the World, I thought, “hey, that’s relatable—most people who care deeply about others oscillate between pain and despair and anger, sometimes this results in dramatic outbursts, especially verbal ones; perhaps this will become a talking point later.” Based on later events/context, I no longer think that’s what the authors intended but I don’t think that interpretation is necessarily wrong—the first step to dealing with emotions is to name them. Anyway, I digress.

I myself am actually a gray ace, so when I imagine Garou and Saitama together, I just give them my ideal relationship which is all of the closeness and all of the shenanigans, but none of the sex. Because at the end of the day, I personally just want someone to gently kiss my hand and affectionately whisper “you’re the literal worst” while giving me the deepest and most genuine smile or drive up outside my window, honking and shouting “wake up, loser! We’re gonna spend all day driving around New Jersey doing nice things for people—but first we’re gonna get ice cream.”

(Anyway, if you follow my main blog or read my more personal posts, it is clear that I Have a Type. Like, really really-- I Have a Type.)

Getting back to OPM, though, when I write fics in particular (but also incorrect quotes or headcanons), I write a lot about Garou and Saitama. I think first of all because it’s fun—they’re very strong but they’re also playful. Saitama is a self-professed “hero for fun,” Garou starts out more like a “villain for fun,” and through various interactions—with each other, as well as their respective anchors—they develop an overarching, shared goal that seems initially dissonant…. but in actuality, their visions are very much the same.

Ultimately, they want a safe and peaceful world for everyone, especially the people they care about. Most importantly, they’re trying to both navigate and improve a world that they themselves always seem to peripheral to & outside of; a world that doesn’t appear to be designed for people like them—even before they gained their incredible abilities.

When it comes to their interpersonal dynamics, though, I think that Saitama has this incredible and interesting ability to provoke reactions in other people without intimidating them. That's the role of the "Wise Fool" character, and I believe that's the archetype Saitama falls into. That levity helps others feel safer as they question their own goals and motives. Villains usually serve a similar role in a story--in a good story, they aren't just a plot device; villains challenge us to re-evaluate our assumptions, expectations, and sometimes our values.

...So, Garou does the same thing: he incites others to flip their perspective. But unlike Saitama, he’s deliberately more provocative and more deliberately irreverent. Saitama certainly can be this way, too, but with Saitama it's usually by accident--but then again, it's hard to tell with him. Despite being perceptive and canny, Saitama is often evasive about the things he knows—at the same time, he doesn’t hesitate to get on a soapbox when he feels like he needs to: Saitama wants to save people from themselves as much as he wants to save them from external threats.

…and because Saitama so often ends up in silly situations, it makes him approachable. As we saw with Reigen and Mob in the MP finale, sometimes we serve others best by showing up as our own divinely imperfect, authentically messy self—which Saitama does. Constantly. (And Garou too! I think the most charming thing about his character, when I first encountered him, was the way Garou laughs off various defeats with beautifully insouciant amusement, so delighted to be growing and learning--which is exactly what Saitama wants for himself, and by extension, the sort of person he might gravitate towards).

In the Before Times, when the MA Manga Finale was but a twinkle in the mangaka’s eye, I imagined Saitama and Garou meeting post (WC fight): Garou is working as a delivery guy (of course), and while on break, he hears somebody screaming inside the grocery store he had been stocking. Lo and behold, and it’s Saitama. Saitama is covered in highly corrosive monster goo, watching in horror as all of his coupons disintegrate—along with his clothing. (Spoiler alert: Saitama is not at all concerned with his clothing).

...understandably, the poor, terrified clerk doesn’t want to take Saitama’s money (which is rapidly eating away the counter) and Garou covers his tab. Garou mutters something like, "for obvious reasons, it pains me to see you like this." Saitama interprets this as longing / jealously and pats the kid on the back with an acid-covered hand, assuring Garou the he will also eventually save the world in his own way--maybe even as a hero. (Garou, meanwhile, is thinking "forget about saving the world... I don't wanna live on this planet anymore"). While maintaining full eye contact, Saitama swipes the entire take-a-penny-leave-a-penny jar and vanishes. It's not a meet cute or anything, it's just it's a weird little moment of catharsis and the beginning of their friendship. It is endgame Gearou, though.

When Genos shows up the next morning to pay Garou back, Garou jokingly asks for 150% interest which Genos pays without blinking. ("Sensei's credit rating leaves much to be desired.")

Anyway, I just feel like there are so many opportunities for Saitama to accidentally get Garou to open up about his feelings. I have a rough draft of the “Dr. Saitama” scene where Garou is pouting silently in several inches of mud, pointedly ignoring Saitama until Saitama comes back with that jar of weird-looking eggs in the upper left corner of the shack scene panel. “I didn’t know you could pickle eggs,” Saitama comments. “I thought you could only pickle pickles.”

At which point, Garou snaps, absolutely indignant that this two-bit asshat cannot grasp the concept of a cucumber. My sense is that Saitama did this on purpose--intentionally prodding Garou a bit, trying to help him express his very real, very painful emotions in a way that feels safer, less frightening. I literally never know what Saitama is doing in my fics though. Probably because Saitama doesn't reliably know that, either.

In the same way that Saitama riles Garou up just enough to make him learn something, Garou riles Saitama up just enough to make him emotional--for example, by discerning Saitama's inexplicable fear of elves and adjusting his Christmas decorations appropriately. It's another Gearou fic, but Saitama is--as I always imagine him--just there, living in the same house, being part of their chosen family. I headcanon that they are always arguing about this (“You said you missed having feelings!” “Not these ones!”). It’s just constant, low-level benign trolling in a way that accidentally makes them both into other people.

So, I don’t really have many romantic headcanons or scenarios with the two of them, although I have entertained the idea. And, admittedly, I do have that “BroTP and sometimes ot3” tag. I’ve kind of entertained the idea of some scenario where the three of them are in a polycule? But it has literally always come from a place I never expected, like I fall asleep after editing a Gearou story and then whatever scene I’m workshopping somehow seeps into my dreams… at which point, the characters nitpick everything I’ve got wrong, including the relationship. “They’re not dating. We are. Don’t you see it?” (Ummm… no I don’t? At least not in that particular instance. Because these are not sexy dreams, mind you, just Exceedingly Vanilla, G-Rated anxiety dreams.)

If I hypothetically wrote a romantic and/or NSFW SaiGarou fic, I imagine it might have something to do with the fact that pain is the only emotion Garou allows himself to feel… and Saitama has already seen him at his worst, and, at the same time, hasn’t been phased by it. So I can imagine a situation where Garou knows he has to revisit that part of himself in order to heal and overcome it—that feeling of being broken and vulnerable but also safe and free, and given that he’s probably a bit touch starved you can see how things might progress from there.

Anyway. If something like this shows up on ao3 a year from now, you will know that it definitely was not me.

So, wow, there’s my answer—something like 1.3k words later :-/ if you’re still here, thanks so much for coming to my Ted Talk. I actually did have a little bit of material prepared in hopes that someone would someday ask me a variation of this question, so I’m grateful to you. This was a really nice thing to wake up to, and well-timed because I woke up at 5a and couldn’t get back to sleep. Also, gosh I'm tired. I hope this all makes sense when I wake up, and please forgive any silly spelling mistakes.

Stay safe and well, Friend!

[amazingmsme]

i don’t really know much of anything about the amazing digital circus but HELLO PRETTY BIRD LADY!! as for questions, who all out of the show’s cast do you think she’d be closest with? also feel free to use this to drop any random fun facts about her if you have any 👀 - mothysfluff

SHE REALLY IS A PRETTY BIRD LADY! She’s inspired by a phoenix & a scarlet macaw, & she’s an acrobat & aerial silk artist for the circus. But tadc is really good & there’s a lot to theorize about! & the animation is very vibrant & fluid! There’s only 2 episodes, so it’s not much to catch up on if you’re interested!

This got a tad bit long, so most is going under the cut

Macawla is so nervous at first, so she’s much more accepting of her fellow girlies. It’s what she’s used to, it feels familiar to her. She’s fine with Kinger, but his nervous energy only sets her on edge even more than she already is. I feel like Ragatha & Gangle are her favorites to be around because she gets along best with Ragatha, & she feels sorry that Gangle’s comedy mask always breaks & she wants to be able to cheer her up. Plus her bird brain saw her & was like oooo petty ribbon? Pretty ribbon for me to play with? Gangle is more than a little intimidated at first, but she convinces her she means well

I think Zooble is the first one she actually got to know because they’re both the first to dip tf out on an adventure, but they’re antisocial & she was still too jumpy to really form a close connection, but they’re on really good terms. When they’re together they usually will just sit in comfortable silence, or she’ll ask if they wanna watch her routine

Once she becomes accustomed to the digital circus, she starts to be a much more flamboyant & loud personality, & it’s a bit overwhelming for Pomni. She has nothing against the harpy, but she kinda needs to learn to tone it down. They’re both nice to each other, but their personalities just kinda clash, & it makes Macawla feel guilty & bad, even tho she doesn’t really know what to do. But she can feel some kind of connection there little does she know Pomni’s irl disappearance was the lead she needed to push her investigation in the right direction & ended with her getting caught at the C&A corp. & put into the digital circus

At first she was sooo shy around Jax cause uwu there’s a guy her age stuck in this hell hole? & then he opened his fucking mouth & she was like oh never mind, you’re literally The Worst. She was fresh meat for bullying, & let’s just say she’s very bully-able. But on the flip side, she is that nice kinda bitchy, like the Heathers or Regina George where she’s just faking it & grinning through her teeth & then gives the sickest burns ever. She does NOT put up with his shit & she teams up with Ragatha to keep him in line

She doesn’t trust Caine as far as she can throw him & is sus of literally everything he does. She entered the digital circus under dubious circumstances, so she really doesn’t trust him & thinks he knows way more than he’s letting on & it constantly trying to catch him in a lie & meanwhile he’s just being his typical weird & wacky self & trying to prove he’s on their side. She doesn’t believe any of it for a second. Unfortunately, she finds him incredibly entertaining

[jack-bytez-genuine-corner]

Random rambling on white in a bio description

[I don’t think I use Tumblr right but I’m just going to do basically a diary entry to myself but I’m going to post it online like a moron instead]

So a few days ago I read a post that I didn’t agree with on any level, with the TL;DR being that minorities are being forced to shoehorn in their race / identities into their bios which is just not true. The main reason I don’t think that is true is that people actively like to put identifiable information, willingly, into their bios especially when it can mean finding a community that is similar to you, for safety, community, and what not I don’t think it’s a force, and I really didn’t agree with the idea that their info undermines any work they post ala Art, Writing, etc. People LIKE labels that they can apply to themselves and to things and even, including when it’s wrong, to others. It gives us a sense of self as people and that’s [Usually] a good thing, it just starts to become wrong when that is no longer a thing for individuals to decide and especially wrong when it’s a large group applying a label to a smaller group by force. Putting that info doesn’t demean you, or your work, or your person, if anything it’s kind of you and brave of you to put that out there for strangers to know.

The main thing that’s stuck with me is moreso why I don’t put say white into my bio because I’m a white gay 25 year old cis man, and I think it has a lot to do with that just looking innately bad to me. I’ve never interacted with someone in a positive sense who ever mentioned that they’re white as a pride thing or put any value into being white in person, and online I think it looks even worse with the rise of antisemitism among whites and the obvious White Supremacy movements. The OP would argue that I don’t do it cause I feel like my race is “Default” when in reality I don’t do it because there’s basically nothing to be proud of in being white or identifying as white. My life long friend who is now happily married and has a kid placed a lot of value in his Meximerican upbringing [His own wording] and told a lot of fun stories based on his family culture, but for me the only love I have for my family tree is in my immediate circle, so mother - father and that’s it. There’s nothing prideful to my racial identity at all or even worth talking about in a positive manner. Like yaaaay I’m the same race as Christopher Columbus, a mad mass murderer who invaded indigenous lands and pillaged them for any and all valuables while killing every single person who didn’t lay down and die that’s soooooooooooo wonderful, or yaaaaaay, I’m the same race as a bunch of puritans who forced their way onto a different country, genocided all the people there causing the long, incredibly violent and racist history of the US, wooooooooooooot......

Obviously I know I can be wrong to an extreme degree, but I really don’t think I’m wrong on this bit when it comes to myself. To me putting the label of “white” on yourself is pretty close to putting “I’m a giant asshole” in bold on your forehead. That’s not universally true obviously, but it definitely doesn’t fill me with confidence. I don’t have the same view when it comes to putting a cultural identity up there, like if you’re Chinese or Irish or German or Spanish that’s all well and good, it’s just the specific use of “white” that tends to bother me. Maybe I haven’t been exposed to the right person, but it’s probably the last piece of info I’d ever want on someone online and in IRL if I hear you mention the words “Pride” and “white” in the same sentence I don’t think I’ll text you back ever. To me there’s an incredibly different context between putting “Black” or “POC” and whatnot on your bio and putting “white” on there.

... This is one of those posts that in 5 years someone will bring it back up to me with it being potentially problematic and I’ll implode right?

[survey--s]

410.

do you ever do these surveys with your SO? No - nobody IRL even knows I take these.

have you ever totally lied or made up ridiculous answers for surveys? I don’t think so.

do animal furs upset you? If they’re for genuine reasons, they’re fine, but most people don’t need to wear fur anymore.

who picks the music when you’re riding in the car? Always me, hahah. I pick when I’m driving and when I’m the passenger.

do you have a waste basket in your car? No. All my rubbish just gets shoved in the doors lol.

what’s the Spanish name for your favourite food? Patatas.

do you know anyone who regularly uses a bike for transportation? Not for actual transport, but lots of people bike for fun around here.

do you consider audio books not really reading? I mean, they’re not reading, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a worthwhile thing to do.

strangest thing you’ve ever put in the trunk of a car? Uh, nothing too strange? Just normal stuff - at the moment, mine is full of riding stuff, spare clothes for work, dog leads and dog treats.

do you carry matches or a lighter? I don’t carry either, but we have lighters at home for candles and the fire, plus we have a gas oven that needs a lighter.

do you keep socks with a hole in them if they are your favorites? Ha, I REALLY need new socks. I don’t think any of the ones I own don’t have holes, actually. I might look on Amazon ha.

last time you wore clothes that were too small on you. I don’t remember.

have you ever frightened someone on purpose. Sure, just mucking around though.

have you ever had something taken away from you by airport security? Nope.

what’s the last wild animal you have seen? Uhh, probably a seagull or a rabbit.

something you were surprised to learn about your parent’s childhood? That my grandparents were physically abusive to my dad.

do you store any non food items in the fridge? I mean, do drinks count? lol.

have you ever told a friend you thought their parent was hot? Ew, no. I’ve never understood that kind of thing.

what was the last thing you bought from a gumball machine? Probably smarties or M&M’s or something, but that was probably 15+ years ago  now ha. They used to have them at the local bowling alley.

have you ever destroyed another person’s belongings out of anger? Nope.

plain band aids or fun ones? Plain ones.

which pain killer do you use? Ibuprofen.

have you ever used someone else’s Rx med? Yes, painkillers and sleeping pills.

have you ever borrowed underwear from a friend? Nope, I’d rather go commando lol.

would you like to be part of a wedding party? Nope.

last pair of shoes you threw out and why? A pair of wellies that had a hole in them.

have you ever thrown anything up to hang on the power/phone lines? Nope.

have you ever really stayed up all night to do homework? Yeah, as a student I regularly pulled all-nighters.

have you ever had anything stolen from you? Yes.

if you could make up one rule for all your friends, what would it be? ....

do you pay attention to people’s posture? I notice it but I don’t really think anything of it either way?

do you have a creepy uncle, or have a friend who has one? Ha no. All my uncles are pretty decent, normal people.

alarm clock, or do you use your phone? I use my phone.

have you ever backed into a cactus? Nope, sounds painful though.

do any of your relatives not have home internet? Yeah, my in-laws don’t have internet or a computer. My MIL doesn’t even have a mobile phone lol.

when you get the munchies, do you want sweet or salty? It depends. Mostly savoury stuff but sometimes a decent bar of chocolate is all that hits the spot.

something you taught yourself how to do? I started teaching myself Spanish on Duolingo, if that counts?