#it's been more than half a year since i've played actively

[podcastenthusiast]

I find it really compelling that Astarion appears to have had hobbies when he was enslaved by Cazador.

Things Astarion probably did in between the horrors:

Embroidered and patched up things for himself (and, reluctantly, his siblings). We know this. Practical--I don't get the feeling Cazador was buying them clothes any more than strictly necessary--and a good way to stay sane.

Got really good at picking locks. Also canon. I've seen the interpretation this was to escape shackles, which is possible. But I dunno...he says himself he gave up on escape. More likely I think he was just very bored, and also such a skill offers some comfort should he ever be locked up again for another year.

Learning languages, including Orcish. Canon as well and honestly I'm dying to know how/when he managed this. Did he find a Orcish-Common dictionary? Did he know a half-Orc? Either way I can see him relishing the chance to insult Cazador or his siblings without them knowing.

Reading, as he does all the time at camp. If you can't escape physically, a good story can be a decent distraction for a while. Astarion is intelligent and seems to know a fair bit of history and such. I imagine it wasn't an activity Cazador encouraged. But that wouldn't stop him and Dal, and later maybe Leon if he's feeling brave, forming a secret book club, reading anything at all they could get their hands on, from awful erotica to dry religious texts.

There must have been a brief period where he tried to befriend and train some rats to do his bidding. But he was bad at it and also very hungry. Violet claims to have succeeded.

Music. He hears it everywhere--in the dingy taverns he's sent to, at Cazador's damn parties, on the street--it's too intense for a while after that infamous year of silence. But it also reminds him that he isn't there anymore. Astarion has no gift for musical instruments himself, but he grows to appreciate hearing a good song.

Drinking wine and pretending it doesn't all taste terrible to him now. Sometimes, alone or with Aurelia, he would pretend it's fresh blood instead. Sometimes he would pretend to just be anyone else.

Stealing his siblings' makeup and anything else he wants. None of them really "own" anything after all, he'll say, but will get incredibly annoyed if they in turn take something of his.

Between fights and torments, of which there were so many, I bet he played stupid little games with his siblings. Trying to convince them he died a very cool death or something. Or enlisting Violet's expertise to prank Petras.

One time Yousen finds like a choose your own adventure book (since I dunno if a form of D&D exists in BG3 and if it did they don't have the supplies). Anyway he reads it to the other spawn and by the end of the night Astarion and Petras both have new black eyes and bite marks.

Not saying it was a good time by any means. It wasn't. But it was a very long time not to carve out an occasional diversion. You'd just lose it otherwise.

[ingravinoveritas]

craftyballoonwinner mentioned you on a post "anna always got to prove to us she still got her…”

I can't wait for @nightgoodomens and @ingravinoveritas takes on today. Something happened and while I'm happy to not have GM around the fact it was MS&DT ALL night makes my eyebrows raise.

@craftyballoonwinner It has taken me the last few days to process everything that happened on Friday, because to say that I am floored by what we got is a tremendous understatement.

We knew that Michael had been in London and had specifically gotten a house in Chiswick close to David's house since November of last year, for his run in Nye at the National Theatre. We knew that the second run in Cardiff ended on June 1st and that as soon as it did, Michael immediately came back to London. We knew that--schedules and work/family commitments allowing--they were likely spending a great deal of time together (despite only seeing three pictures of them over the course of that entire interval: The Macbeth photo, the blurry pic that Anna posted back in November, and the photo from Lapland last December).

The smallest pieces, flashes of something beautiful and bright yet still obscured, ensconced from public view. So much so that I never in a million years expected Michael to come to Pub in the Park--hoped, certainly, but the thought of it actually happening seemed like a distant dream, a dazzling impossibility.

But this past Friday was just...so extraordinary and lovely precisely because it was ordinary. It wasn't a press junket or an interview or Michael and David promoting something...it was just them. The two of them together, basking in the warmth of each other's presence. It was there even in the first picture I saw, and it permeated through every clip, every moment of them at the event:

The smiles. The ease and comfort they have around each other. The effortless love that just exists between Michael and David, and that is tangible in every dimension, as much on a screen as in real life. And when they were on stage together, it wasn't even that they played off each other so well--it was that Michael's last minute appearance didn't cause either of them to lose so much as a step. It was that you just knew that they couldn't have put any other two people up on that stage without prior planning and had that same chemistry, that charm and familiarity. And it was just so damn wonderful to see Michael and David looking so happy and joyful overall.

As for what happened with Georgia, I am just more confused than anything else. For the last month and a half, Georgia heavily promoted PitP, and both she and David billed her as a co-host. Every flyer, every piece of promotion that was shared (both by the PitP social media and Georgia) mentioned her as a co-host, along with David. She even did an interview on the Gaby Roslin podcast with David and Arabella Weir where she was again specifically referred to as a co-host and admitted not knowing her own Instagram handle, as well as saying that she would be active on Insta during the PitP event.

There is a strange irony to the podcast as well, given that David actually said "We're failing our hosting duties right here!" in the above linked clip, and what seemed like a joke at the time actually came to pass. For whatever reason, Georgia failed in her duty, the job that she signed up to do. Had it been because of all the attacks that David was a target of over the past week after the blow-up with Kemi Badenoch, Rishi Sunak, and the entire Tory party, that would have made sense. I would have completely understood if Georgia, who had also been targeted in those attacks, was feeling anxious or worried about her/the kids' safety and elected to stay home instead.

However...Georgia didn't stay home. She actually was at the event, as were several of their kids (Ty and Olive, from what I've seen). She was there, drinking and dancing, and somehow that made her abdication of co-hosting duty even more conspicuous and strange. It also makes it increasingly obvious that Michael's appearance on stage was a last minute occurrence and not part of the original plan of events.

So what actually happened? I don't know. None of us know, and it's likely we won't know until a later time, if ever. But in the real world, if you are given a job to do, if a contract is signed with a written agreement to do that job and you don't do the job, there are consequences. At the very least, it can negatively affect someone's reputation and reduce the likelihood of them receiving offers for future jobs. On the other end, you could be looking at potential lawsuits for things like breach of contract. And none of this even gets into disappointed fans or attendees who might've been hoping to see Georgia host and who could possibly now claim to be victims of false advertising because she didn't.

It also feels like a huge missed opportunity on the part of PitP, who could have potentially raised hundreds or even thousands of pounds more for charity had Michael been booked as a co-host, or even a guest. Regardless of whether Michael was there in an official capacity, though, I am just glad that he was there, and that we got to see the two of them together again.

The night may have lacked the glitz and formal glamour of the NTAs, but it more than made up for it with the relaxed domesticity we got to see between Michael and David. And now that Michael is hanging around London a bit longer, hopefully there will be many more memorable nights like this to come.

[matan4il]

I saw your post about Noah and it just but a bee in my bonnet about how people in all sorts of fandoms have been doing similar things to Jewish actors (but it’s not as well known cause they’re obviously not as high profile as stranger things). I follow you from the 911 fandom, and I also watch 911 Lone Star and both Ronen Rubinstein (who plays TK) and Lisa Edelstein (who guest starred so isn’t a regular anymore but is iconic in her own right) have gotten hate. Ronen removed his twitter after people started calling him a Zionist and harassing him. Lisa turned comments off on some of her ig posts and specifically said it was so she wouldn’t get attacked. The only things those two have said are in regards to getting the hostages home safe or in reaction to the immediate events of Oct 7. Yet they’re being called supporters of genocide. The antisemitism disguised as “antizionism” is so fucking obvious and it’s sad how it’s infiltrated even the smaller fandoms if actors involved dare to be Jewish and express concern for fellow Jews.

Hi Nonnie!

First of all, yes. Sadly, there is not a single fandom I have been active in, that has been a safe space for Jews in general, and they've all become worse since Oct 7. So I'll talk a bit about the 911 fandom, but let's be clear that this fandom isn't the issue, it really is a symptom of a much bigger problem, which is very prevalent in online spaces, not just online fandoms. What I'll talk about is obviously not true for every single person, but it IS true for enough people, and especially for some very vocal ones, who shape what the "allowed" discourse is.

I have not been following what the 911 fandom does and says about Ronen Rubinstein for at least 2 years, but I can't say I'm surprised by what you told me.

I've written more than once about the fact that Jews are not white, not even the white passing ones. Also, I'm hardly the only Jew raising their voice about this, and yet I've noticed that the 911 fandom, which raged when half-white Eddie Diaz was not recognized as a POC by one fan, the fandom which has accepted Christopher Diaz as a POC (even though he's canonically only 25% Mexican, and is played by an actor who actually IS white, which means there's no arguing over the fact that Chris looks white), is also the fandom which has repeatedly conceptualized Ronen as a white guy, same for his character TK (even though he's canonically only half white), and with that view in mind there's been hostility towards Ronen that I've come across not long after 911LS just started. Ronen's family is from an area where Jews had been repeatedly slaughtered, including during the Holocaust for NOT being white less than one hundred years ago. TK looks white (you know, exactly like Chris), so that's enough to ignore Jewish identity, history, being native to the Middle East, and anti-Jewish persecution. Ronen gets conceptualized as a white oppressor. And as such, he's a fair target, even an encouraged one.

Gavin, whose character Chris is recognized as a POC, even though he himself is completely white.

Ronen, whose character TK is not recognized as a POC, even though the actor is fully Jewish.

Natacha, whose character Marjan is recognized as a POC, even though the actress herself is half white. She's also half Lebanese, Marjan is fully so, and whatever Arabs are, Jews are the exact same, because both groups are native to South West Asia (similarly, both groups come in a variety of skin tones).

So I'm not surprised that Ronen is being mistreated. Jews are mis-conceptualized as white, and the Israeli-Arab conflict gets mis-conceptualized by applying to it a race-based model imported from the US, in which Israelis are white Jews (even though 21% of our population is Arab, a part of our leadership is Arab and has been since the first Knesset was elected, over 70 years ago, and even though many of the Israeli soldiers fighting to protect us are Arabs... when the conflict is explained, they're all erased, and Israelis are only understood as - and blamed as - white Jews), who are evil oppressors of brown Arabs (even though some Arabs are just as white looking, or even whiter than some Jews). Then, this conflict is used to vilify and justify harassing Jewish actors, whether Noah in Stranger Things, Timothee Chalamet, or Ronen and Lisa.

Here are some white looking Palestinians, who always get ignored by the people conceptualizing the conflict as white vs brown people:

Two pics of Israeli soldiers killed, each pic from just one day in this war in Gaza, and you can see the diversity of skin tones...

Like I said, I haven't been following Ronen, but I did happen across a post that claimed he needs to be canceled for the crime of blocking people who the poster said were pro-Palestine. But in my experience, even when you're a Jew who is not being hateful towards Palestinians, you're just pro both groups, because you recognize they're both humans, the fact that you have the "audacity" to stand up for Jewish people and Jewish rights, and against the mis-representation of Jews in Israel, is enough for antisemitic bullies to use that to come after you with antisemitic abuse under the guise of being pro-Palestinian (here's just one example. I wonder how many Palestinians have been liberated by harassing Jews online. Pretty sure the answer is zero. I also always love how this crowd never actually stands up for Palestinians when they're wronged by fellow Arabs, in Kuwait, Egypt, Jordan, Lebanon or Syria. It's only the Jews who bother these "pro-Palestinians," not the actual well being of Palestinians). I'm sure that if we could see who Ronen was blocking, it would be the same kind of people who have been sending me these very caring, human rights-oriented messages:

^ This ask was specifically a response to my reply to an anon telling me I lost my claim to humanity when I became an Israeli (and me answering that that was at the age of 5 months, and that my parents' decision to bring me to Israel actually saved my life).

^ Just a small collection, nowhere near what I actually got, but I kept them 'coz I wanted to show people at some point what Jews who dare to not want Israel destroyed are subjected to. And Ronen probably got similar ones, he blocked them, and for saying he was blocking them, he got further hate... At what point are people going to wake up and see that this is how an antisemitic misinformation campaign works? Lots of Germans genuinely believed in the narrative that Jews backstabbed them during WWI. If you were to ask them in the 1930's whether they hate Jews simply for being Jews, they'd say no, that they hated Jews, because Jews deserved to be hated due to their actions. In the exact same way, now support of the existence of the Jewish state, not even of its specific policies, is being spun as justification to hate on Jews.

I'll say this again. This reply isn't about Ronen. It isn't about Noah. It isn't about Lisa. This isn't about a specific fandom. This is a call for people to wake up and smell the antisemitic coffee, the legitimization of Jews being harassed. Please don't be a part of it, and if you can, please speak up when you see others being a part of it. I KNOW that online, and def on Tumblr, the majority of posts you see justify the vilifaction of anyone who is pro Israel's existence, even while also being critical of its leadership. And it's easy, and it feels right, to go with what everyone else in your echo chamber says. But you can be that one guy in 1930's Germany who didn't do the heil Hitler. If you will be, it may not be easy, but I very much doubt you'd ever regret it.

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[something-tofightfor]

On Deck Part 1: Hot Corner

Pairing: Jack Daniels x Female Reader Baseball AU

Word Count: 8,117

Rating: M (language, general adult thoughts, etc.)

Summary: Taking your best friend's little brother to a minor leage game to see his favorite player just might lead to a lot of changes in your life.

And you're ready.

Author’s notes: 

This story has been in progress for more than two years. I've written about Baseball Jack many times before ... but only the "after". It's time to see how - and where - it all began.

(On Deck universe masterlist for all the extras!)

Thank you to everyone that convinced me to work on this and to keep this pairing going / to flesh them out more. I have had so much fun with this because I have such a love for the MLB (and the men who play in the league) - and I'm so excited to share it.

While there are a lot of baseball references within this story, you only need to know the basics to enjoy it and understand them - we're not getting overrly technical here.

As always, if you have any questions or comments, please feel free to reach out. I hope you enjoy this as much as I am.

Third base is often called the ‘hot corner’ due to the prevalence of right handed hitters - and subsequent on-field action - in the league. The third baseman is typically the infield position player closest to the batter, so to excel in this position, players need to display quick reaction times and exceptional hand-eye coordination. 

“We’re going to be late.” He stood next to you, arms crossed over his chest. “We still have to walk to the stadium.” 

“Caleb.” You sighed, closing and then locking the car door before sticking your keys into the small bag you’d bought specifically for games. “We’re here. We’re parked. The stadium is right there.” Pointing with one finger, you raised a brow and grinned. “The parking lot is only half full, and we’ve already got seats, so -”

“Yeah, but we’re going to miss warm ups and the pregame.” He rolled his eyes, turning away from you and heading toward the ballpark. “And those are the best parts.” 

You agreed, but for a very different reason than the twelve year old you were with. 

You’d been to games with him and Erin before. You and your friend sat a few rows back while the pre-teen hurried down to field level, a baseball and a pen clutched in one hand, hoping to meet at least one of the players after they’d finished warming up and stretching. 

From your vantage point, the two of you had been free to whisper about the players - pointing out the way their uniforms fit, discussing whether or not their asses were in mid-season form yet, or even commenting on the stretches they chose to warm up with before the game. Typically, you didn’t have a thing for men in uniform - but baseball pants were a different story. 

You loved the game, and had been visiting The Distillery - your local team’s home park - since you were a child, attending games with your family and friends and even dates as the years passed. Baseball games were the perfect summer activity no matter who you were with, and that was even true when your company was the younger brother of your best friend… and the game wasn’t a Major League competition. 

“She’s got the tickets.” He made the announcement when you reached the gates, the boy pointing back over his shoulder at you. “Two of them.” You smiled at the attendant, sliding your unzipped bag across the table so she could search it, and then returned your eyes to Caleb. He’d already removed his ballcap and the wallet he carried, pushing them forward and stepping through the metal detector. 

“He’s excited, hmm?” 

“Yeah.” Letting her scan the ticket barcodes, you laughed. “He really is.” Caleb waited for you to follow him through the turnstiles, his hat flipped backwards on his head, and you could see the impatience on his face. “Caleb, do you want to get something to eat before we -”

“No.” He shook his head. “Not yet. Before the game starts, but …” He glanced over his shoulder and you looked down at the field, where the grounds crew were still getting everything ready. “Can we go down there? I want to try and meet him. He’s playing today. They said it on the news.”

“Go.” Your smile widened, head moving up and down in a nod. “I’m right behind you, kid.” 

Caleb took off running toward the stairs that led down toward the third base line, and you followed him slowly, taking your time and eyeing the seating situation. There were people already waiting; a handful of kids and their parents, along with a few women that looked to be your age or a little younger, but there were still plenty of seats open adjacent to the field. 

You sat closer than you normally would have, deciding to take a seat in the row directly behind the boy. Just in case. For the next ten minutes, you paid no attention to the field, instead scrolling through social media and waiting, the music pumping through the speakers fading to background noise as you mindlessly browsed and clicked ‘like’ on a few posts. 

You also let Erin know that you’d made it to the game, and that Caleb was exactly where he wanted to be. But when you glanced up, ready to take a picture to send to her, you were distracted by the sight of the team taking the field. Caleb was too, the boy bouncing up and down in place as he leaned forward, resting his hands on the low wall in front of him. 

You watched for a few minutes - eyeing the players as they did their sprints and stretches, your lips twisting into a small smile at the sight of some of them utilizing their trainers for extra resistance during a few of the exercises. “He’s not here.” Caleb turned back to look at you, disappointment on his face. “Why isn’t he here?”

“Maybe he’ll come out late.” You shrugged, still looking at the field. “You never know, kiddo. You said he’s in the lineup, right?” 

“Yeah.” He turned back to the field, leaning forward. “They talked on the radio about how he was coming back today, because they want him to back in Louisville by the end of next week, and -” Caleb stopped mid sentence, straightening up. “There he is!” 

You couldn’t help it, your attention snapping in the direction that he was pointing. Sure enough, Jack Daniels and one of the trainers - a woman with short, dark hair and glasses - were taking the field to a low chorus of cheers, many of them coming from the section you were sitting in. There he is. 

Despite yourself, you leaned forward to watch him, staring as Jack began his warm up. He started with a few stretches - knee hugs and focusing on his quads, carefully extending and testing his arms, and then bent forward at the waist, the man almost able to press his palms flat against the ground without bending his knees. 

You didn’t take your eyes off of him, because like Caleb, one of the reasons you liked going to the Statesman games was looking at Jack Daniels. And there’s so much to look at.

The trainer watched him closely as he continued to warm up, speeding up his movements and then doing a series of static stretches. But when Jack started to do lunges, you actively fought back a groan, settling against the backrest of your seat and chewing on your lower lip. That’s hot as fuck. 

He looked healthy, and you were happy to see it, because the truth was that the Statesman needed him to be. “He didn’t warm up yesterday.” You turned your head toward the voice, watching as another woman next to you stared at Jack, her smile wide. “He stretched a little, and took batting practice, but he didn’t warm up.” 

“Oh, you were here yesterday, too?” She nodded, and when you glanced back at the field, you saw that Jack and the trainer had switched to more arm exercises, warming up the muscles of his upper body. 

“He pinch hit late in the game.” She leaned forward, her smile widening as she watched Jack start arm circles, the trainer standing a few feet away from him with her arms crossed. “So I knew he’d play today. And that’s why I’m here.” She leaned closer, lowering her voice. “Gonna shoot my shot when he comes over here to sign for the kids. Why not, right? We both know he goes for it sometimes.” 

The girl was pretty - and definitely dressed to get his attention. She wore one of his t-shirts artfully slashed to show off her cleavage and had her legs on display in a pair of cutoff denim shorts. Good for her. “Yeah, why not.” You smiled, turning your head away from where the players were sprinting into the outfield and back to give her your full attention. “Even if he’ll be back in Louisville pretty soon, you might as well. See what happens.”

“It’s only 40 minutes away.” She shrugged, looking out and pointing at where the man was laying on the field, one knee bent and his other ankle resting against the top of it. The trainer was applying extra resistance, and you hummed in approval as you watched. I wish I was that trainer.  “I’d drive there if I needed to.” 

Her eagerness didn’t surprise you. Jack was a notably eligible bachelor, and one of the most desirable men on the team. Unlike the others, though, he didn’t often publicly date. But that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t hook up. And … You returned your attention to the field, watching as he stopped to talk to the woman, pointing at the front of his left shoulder and grinning. And I’m sure he’s got his pick in every city he visits. 

“Oh, I think they’re coming over now.” 

She adjusted her shirt and you watched her posture change, the woman’s shoulders straightening and her smile widening. Instead of staring at Jack’s strut toward the seats, you looked at Caleb. The boy was buzzing with excitement as he turned toward where the man was headed - about ten people to your left, where a small crowd had gathered. “Do you think he’ll come over?” Caleb said your name, frowning. “There’s not much time, and -”

“He will.” You leaned in, reaching out to touch his arm. “You’re wearing one of his shirts, right? He’s gotta stop for you.” Caleb grinned, turning back toward the field, though he kept his head turned to the left. 

You watched Jack then, smiling as he interacted with the fans. He signed autographs and posed for a few pictures, his smile genuine. But you noticed that he was really only focused on the kids and teenagers, spending more than a few seconds with them instead of moving along as quickly as was politely possible the way he did with adults. He took pictures with a few women, the man leaning in but keeping both hands behind his back. He puts his hands on the kids’ shoulders, but doesn’t touch the women… interesting. 

“Keep your phone out. I’m gonna need you to take a picture.” Caleb was excited, the boy happier than you ever remembered seeing him. You laughed but did as he asked, leaning to the right and angling the phone so that you could snap a picture of the two of them, though Jack was barely in the frame. 

The girl next to you leaned forward when he was only a person or two away, and then seemed to second guess that decision. You bit back a laugh as she stood and climbed over the seats, standing next to Caleb and effectively blocking your view of the man on the field. Gee, thanks.

He finished with the little girl that he’d been speaking to, handing her back a signed baseball and a pen, and then took a step to the side and in front of the woman, saying hello. 

Clearly hearing his voice in person shocked you - the man’s accent thick, even in the few words he spoke. You desperately wished that you could see him, but you didn’t want to shift in your seat and draw attention to yourself. I’ll see him when he talks to Caleb.

“I heard you were playing and had to come today.” She leaned forward, fingertips resting against the wall. “It’s been too long since I’ve seen you.”

“Yeah?” He laughed, reaching up to pull his hat off and then set it back down on his head, taking a few seconds to think. You caught a glimpse of the bullseye tattoo on his hand, biting down on your lower lip at the sight. “Well thank you for comin’ out. It’s good to be back on the field.” The woman giggled and then held her phone up, tilting her head to the side. 

“Can we get a picture? I’ll tag you in it on Instagram, and -”

“Sure.” You watched as the woman spun around and then leaned backwards, holding her phone up to take a selfie. “Hope it’s a good one.” He smiled, peering at the phone from over her shoulder, and you fought back a roll of your eyes at how wide and practiced her smile was - the woman’s head cocked to the side - and toward his. 

When she straightened up, he took a half step toward Caleb, already tipping his head down and toward the boy. But the woman spoke up before he could fully move on, reaching out to touch his arm. “Thank you, Jack. You have no idea how much I -” He flinched - just barely, but you saw it, his shoulder jerking back slightly as her fingertips made contact.

“No problem. Thank you, and enjoy the game.” She stiffened, but you didn’t focus on that. You turned your attention to the boy in front of you - and in turn, Jack, whose face split into a grin, the man’s dimple on display, even beneath the shade from the brim of his hat. “Well hi there. I’m Jack, what’s your name?” 

“Caleb.” He leaned forward and you opened your camera app again, your smile widening, too. Caleb’s going to be so excited later. “I had tickets to see you play in Louisville and then you got hurt and I didn’t know if you’d be back this season but then my mom bought me tickets for today after I found out you were going to play again, and so we drove all the way here -” 

“Slow down there, big guy.” Jack laughed, giving you a glimpse of his teeth, and then gestured to Caleb’s hand, the boy holding a Sharpie tightly. “You want me to sign somethin’ for you?” 

“Yeah. This ticket, please.” Caleb held the marker out, looking up at Jack. “And I’ve got your jersey, but it was too hot to wear it today, so I picked this t-shirt instead.” 

“Of course I will.” He nodded, taking the Sharpie and the paper, scrawling his name across the front of it. “Turn around and I’ll sign real big on the number on the back.” Caleb spun around and you were thrilled to see that he was almost delirious with excitement, his eyes wide and his smile nearly splitting his face in two. 

“Can I take a picture of you signing for him?” Jack glanced up at the sound of your voice, his smile faltering for a split second and a confused look passing over his features. “I didn’t want to just do it and have the flash go off, and…”

“Go right ahead.” He smiled again, giving you a nod. “Thank you for askin’.” It only took a few seconds for him to sign, but you took multiple pictures, and then as Jack capped the marker, you decided to speak up again, not wanting to make Caleb ask. 

“And can I get one of the two of you looking at the camera before he turns around again?’

“You’ve already got your phone out.” Jack smirked at you, and then reached up to tilt the brim of his hat back, showing you more of his face. Holy shit, look at him. “I’m more’n happy to take a picture with my new buddy Caleb.” 

You couldn’t help smiling at that, and when Jack settled his hand - the Sharpie poking out from between his fingers - against the boy’s shoulder and squeezed, it widened. “Got it.” You lowered the device, mouthing the words ‘thank you’ at Jack at the same time Caleb spoke them out loud, turning back to face the man. 

There were only two more kids to the right of you waiting to talk to Jack, but before moving to them, he hesitated, looking between you and the boy. “Where are you and your mom sitting today, Caleb?”  Mom? Do I really look like -

“She’s not my mom, she’s my sister’s friend. And we’re over there.” He pointed at the outfield. “Somewhere.” Why is he asking? 

“The section right at the end of the dugout.” Jack pointed, but looked directly at you. “First row. Aisle seats, 23 and 24. They’re mine, and if you want ‘em, today they’re yours.” 

“What? Jack, that -” 

“I’ve gotta go.” He nodded, looking at Caleb and grinning, and then back at you, his smile softening. “Enjoy the game.” He didn’t say anything else before he stepped down the field and then stopped to talk to the other kids waiting. What the fuck just … “That was so cool!” Caleb spun back to look at you, his eyes wide. “He signed my shirt and took a picture with me and now we get to sit in his seats, and -”

“Caleb.” You took a breath, still trying to process what had happened in the previous few minutes. “I don’t -” 

“We’re going to sit in them, right?” You didn’t know how to answer him. Should we? You sighed and then looked to your right, watching as Jack signed a baseball and handed it back to a little girl before laughing with an older man that was with her. “I mean he told us to, and -” 

“I definitely would.” The girl next to you spoke up, and when you looked over, you saw that she was jealous, her eyes narrowed as they looked you over. “Do you know him? Is that -”

“I’ve never spoken to that man before just now.” You shrugged, unsure of what else to say. “I have no idea what … or why, or …” You would have been lying if you’d said that no part of you was a little smug at the fact  that he’d offered the seats to you and not to her, but you didn’t want to be that woman. “He must have liked you, Caleb.”

“Yeah, that’s it.” She rolled her eyes, scoffing. “Whatever. I’ll just see him after the game at the players’ parking lot.” She stood then, but didn’t say anything else before she spun away from you and headed down the row and toward the aisle. 

Caleb watched her go, his head tilted to one side.“What crawled up her butt?” You snorted at his question but there was no way you could give him an actual answer - so you gave him a partial one. 

“She’s probably just sad that you get to have a great view of the game tonight, kiddo.” With a sigh, you stood up, sliding your phone back into your bag and zipping it. You looked at Jack, watching as he said goodbye to the last of the fans and then headed for the dugout. 

But he didn’t go straight there - instead, he stopped and spoke to one of the security guards, pointing at the stands. Oh, he’s… And then you were stunned when both men looked back in your direction, Jack raising one arm to point at you while nodding. The security guard caught your eye and nodded too, and you then watched as Jack gently smacked him on the arm and smiled again, finally turning away to disappear back into the dugout. 

“Can we go and see the seats? And can I get french fries? Will you send the picture to my mom? And Erin? And -” He was excited - and you couldn’t blame him - but you still laughed, gesturing for Caleb to follow you down the row and toward the opposite aisle, closer to your new seats. 

“Yeah. We’ll do all that. Let’s go.” 

There was plenty of room for the two of you to walk to where Jack had indicated, and when you got close, the same security guard that Jack had spoken to stepped forward, gesturing with one hand. “You’re right here tonight.” 

You thanked him, letting Caleb choose which seat he wanted, and when you dropped into the remaining one, you pulled your phone out again as the boy leaned forward, resting his elbows on the back of the wall in front of him. 

You had just enough time to send off a few quick texts to Erin - the pictures of Caleb and Jack, as well as one that you took from the seat and a message that said we got upgraded, I’ll explain later before the National Anthem started. 

You rose to your feet again, keeping your eyes on the field. Once the music faded and the announcer began to give the starting lineups, you were excited, your smile just as wide as Caleb’s. 

And when they announced Jack and the man trotted out onto the field to even more cheers from the crowd, you clapped along with them, pulse quickening. I love watching him play. 

He and the shortstop tossed a ball back and forth a few times while the pitcher made his way from the bullpen, and the grin never left the dark haired man’s face. By the time the ump signaled the start of the game, he was settled in place and standing a little behind the bag, knees spread and both hands resting on his thighs. 

It took a few batters for him to see any action, and when you heard the crack of the bat, Jack sprung into motion, moving toward second and bending over to scoop the ball off the infield before tossing it to first for the out. 

You cheered just as loudly as Caleb did, clapping your hands without looking away from the field - but you weren’t expecting to catch Jack’s eye when he turned to move back into place at third… and you definitely weren’t expecting him to grin at the sight of you. 

The moment was over quickly, and as the players ran off the field after the third out, you turned to Caleb, clearing your throat. “You said you wanted fries?” 

— 

You made it back to your seats just in time to watch the bottom of the second, both of you carrying a drink and a snack. Jack was batting 8th, so there was a good chance he wouldn’t hit until the next inning, giving you time to eat before he headed to the plate. 

You also checked your messages, a series of exclamation points from Erin and a thumbs up from her mother the only two you had waiting. You showed Caleb, the boy laughing and then scrolling up to look at the picture of him and Jack, his smile so broad that you thought it must have hurt. 

There were no seats in front of you, which meant that you had an unobstructed view when the man finally headed to the plate, the familiar sound of his walkup music - Hungry Like The Wolf - blaring through the stadium’s speakers. Here we go. C’mon, Jack. 

He took a few practice swings and you were relieved to see that he didn’t wince or hesitate. His swing looked comfortable, and when you leaned forward, resting your hands on your knees, you nodded as he took another, pointing the bat outward before settling it on his shoulder and waiting. 

He swung at the first two pitches, making contact on the second one and hitting a long foul down the first base line. But Jack ended up walking, taking his place on first and then getting into position as the catcher stepped to the plate. 

You watched him closely - taking in the way the dark blue jersey fit him, the V of upper chest skin - and a peek of the gold chain he wore - visible thanks to two of the buttons being undone, his socks pulled high to accentuate his muscled calves. He always looks fucking great. 

You knew it meant nothing that he’d offered you and Caleb his seats that day - that he’d just done it to be nice. But you would have been lying to yourself if you said that it didn’t make you feel good, Jack’s momentary attention a confidence boost, especially after the reception he’d given the woman next to you. 

The batter hit a single, and when Jack advanced to second and stopped, you cheered again, the man clapping his hands and shouting something that you couldn’t hear at his teammate. But it was all for nothing, because the following player popped out, ending the inning. 

Jack trotted across the field and toward the dugout, the disappointment on his face evident - but again, when he saw you he smiled, the expression only there briefly … though you certainly didn’t miss it. 

As you settled back against the seat, halfway listening to Caleb as he recounted team stats, you wondered why Jack was making so much of an effort when nothing would come of it. You thought of the woman’s comment about the players lot, wondering just how likely it was that you’d be able to meet him if you went, too. But not with Caleb here. 

The night would be a good memory at least - for both you and the boy, and that would have to be enough. 

By the time Jack stepped to the plate, you were more than ready. The setting sun shaded the sky in hues of orange and purple, the stadium’s lights brightening up the field. Your eyes flicked from where Jack stood to the scoreboard, scanning over the information about him that was displayed there and lingering on the giant image of his smiling face. 

But when you heard the groan of the crowd, your attention snapped back to home plate, where Jack was arguing with the umpire over the previous call, his head shaking back and forth. He stepped back into the box, but you could see his irritation, though it didn’t last for long.

He swung on the next pitch and made contact again, sending the ball straight through between first and second. It rolled halfway into the outfield before anyone got to it, and you got to your feet and cheered, the sound signaling that a run scored loud through the speakers. Not only had he gotten his first hit after the injury, but he’d batted someone in, giving the Cavalry the lead. 

And when the next player swung hard, sending the ball up and out and over the center field wall, the stadium erupted - Jack raising his arm and pumping his fist as he rounded third, before stopping to wait for his teammate to make it home. They celebrated for a few seconds and then off the field, and you slung an arm around Caleb as both of you cheered, too. 

They took a three run lead into the next inning, and then handled their business, setting the batters down 1-2-3 thanks to a double play that Jack initiated. You could see his confidence in every movement; his body remembering exactly what he needed to do to be successful on the field even after weeks away. And he’s good at it, too. That makes a difference.  

Caleb left the seats to fill up his cup from the fountain at the top of your section, and by the time he came back the game had started again. It was a productive inning. You spent more of it on your feet than sitting, joining the crowd in cheering as the Cavalry scored three more runs. But when Jack’s turn to bat came, you realized what the celebration meant. 

“They took him out.” You looked down at Caleb, watching as he frowned. “They’ve got such a lead, that it’s better to rest him, and …” 

“That’s stupid.” Caleb crossed his arms, sighing. “He only batted twice.” You agreed, but you also weren’t the manager of a baseball team. You figured he had a better idea of what the right strategy was when it came to Jack’s rehab … even if it did disappoint you that you wouldn’t get to see him at the plate or on the field again. 

The rest of the game went by quickly, and though they gave up a few runs, your team ended up winning handily. Caleb requested to stay and watch the on-field celebration after, and as the players lined up for high fives and handshakes before leaving for the locker room, you focused, too. Maybe he’ll come back out for a second. 

It was stupid and you knew it, but the moment the field emptied, it meant that the night - and the experience in Jack’s seats - was over… and you didn’t want it to be.

He took his place in line - still wearing his uniform but without his hat - and you watched as he greeted the other players, smiling and laughing with them as they interacted. You couldn’t hear him, but you could tell he was happy, and that made you smile, too. Maybe he really will be back in Louisville by next week. 

The handshakes ended, and when Jack headed back toward the dugout, he didn’t look in your direction again - until right before he made it to the top of the steps. 

It was then that he stopped, eyeing the seats until he saw the two of you. You tried not to react, but Caleb didn’t hide his response; the boy raising his hand and waving wildly. Jack laughed at the sight of it, lifting one of his hands in a wave, too. 

You thought that was it, but then his head turned just enough that he made direct eye contact with you. 

Even from the distance, you could see one side of his mouth lift into a half smile as he nodded, raising one hand and touching the tips of his fingers to his temple before tipping them toward you. Your smile grew and you nodded in return, but before you could do anything else, Jack disappeared into the dugout, leaving the two of you standing in front of the seats. 

Well that was something. Biting your lip and letting out a breath through your nose, you turned your attention toward Caleb, saying his name. “Alright, kiddo. We’re going to go to the bathroom before we head out, because I am not stopping twenty minutes into the drive to let you pee.” 

— 

You’d expected Caleb to talk your ear off the entire drive home. Instead, he fell asleep before you made it back to the highway, leaving you with your thoughts on the drive back. 

And you would have been lying if you said that most of those thoughts weren’t of Jack. 

The interaction with him had been limited, sure. But it had been meaningful in more than one way, for both you and Caleb. He had a cool story that he could tell his friends, and pictures that he could show them. You’d look back on the way his gaze on you had felt and remember the thrill of being on the receiving end of one of his bright smiles. 

You didn’t know him any more than any other person that had ever seen him play or interacted with him briefly, but that didn’t matter. Even if you never spoke to him again, and never saw him in any capacity aside from on the field, you’d have that night as a memory. And a damn good one.

After dropping Caleb off and promising Erin a recap the following day, you drove the short distance to your house and parked in the driveway, turning the car off and enjoying the silence for a few seconds before unbuckling your seatbelt. 

Your house was quiet and dark as you moved through it, leaving your shoes and bag by the front door and grabbing your phone before heading upstairs. You tossed that onto your bed and went into the bathroom, scrubbing your face and changing into your pajamas before staring at your reflection in the mirror. 

You’d been single for six months, and though you’d talked to a few men through the same dating app Erin had used to meet Troy, none of the conversations had led anywhere past the first awkward meetings. It wasn’t that the men weren’t interested, it was you that was selective, opting not to waste your time with anyone that reminded you of the time you’d spent with your most recent ex. 

You knew that you were being picky, but you were content with that knowledge, even if it meant a longer period of being on your own before you found the right person. And Jack couldn’t ever be the right person. You wrinkled your nose while you brushed your teeth, still watching yourself in the mirror. Because he’s been consistently single for his entire career. 

Jack kept much of his personal life private, but Janie was the exception to that. 

And after climbing into bed and plugging your phone in, you searched their names, refreshing your memory of the story that you’d become familiar with when The Statesman had first drafted Jack. 

They’d been high school sweethearts, opting to go to college together. He was going to play ball and major in engineering, and her chosen field was communications. It was clear from all of the pictures of the two of them you found that though they were young, they were in love. 

Everything had gone well for the first few months; Jack and Janie settled in on campus, started classes and began making friends. They’d come home together for Christmas, and Jack was set to begin baseball in January with the rest of the team. 

But only a few weeks into the pre-season, the unthinkable happened: Janie stopped at a convenience store to buy coffee on her way to meet her study group off campus while Jack was at a team workout, and was caught in the middle of a robbery. She hadn’t even made it to the hospital, and Jack had considered quitting the team due to his grief. 

Her parents had convinced him otherwise - reminding him that he’d worked hard for years to get to where he was, and that she wouldn’t have wanted him to give up on his dreams on her account. His parents had agreed, though there were interviews where they admitted that they would have understood if he’d chosen to take a break or even quit outright. 

And Jack had taken a few weeks off, but was ready to go on opening day, dedicating his season to Janie and her family. He was a skilled player, there was no question about it, but the coverage of a D1 athlete losing his girlfriend in such a shocking manner helped draw attention to the man and his performance, and it hadn’t taken him long to grab the attention of scouts. 

He’d had some attention in high school, too, though nothing had panned out - aside from the offer of a partial athletic scholarship. That all changed in his sophomore year when everyone really took notice of his exceptionally high fielding percentage and his infectious enthusiasm toward his teammates. 

Jack declared for the draft that was to take place a month after finishing his junior year - only days after his 21st birthday, and The Statesman had taken him with the fourth overall pick in the first round. 

The rest was history. 

He’d played with The Cavalry for almost four seasons before getting his first call-up, and though it had been toward the end of the regular season, Jack had received an invite to Spring Training the following year … and he’d never gone back. 

In his second season with The Statesman, he’d been named the starting shortstop, making a name for himself with both his agility and personality. His teammates loved him. The community loved him. The cameras loved him, and in the five seasons he’d played in his original position, he earned two gold gloves and got voted into the All-Star Game once. 

But he was injury prone, and after careful consideration, they moved Jack from shortstop to third base. It was an adjustment period for everyone involved, though after a few years of playing the position, it seemed almost natural for him, and there were fewer injuries. 

Until earlier that season, anyway, when Jack had misjudged a slide into second and jammed his shoulder, spraining a muscle and knocking him out of all baseball activities for weeks. He’d gone on the 60 day injured list, though you’d seen him at more than a few games in the dugout before he’d headed down to rehab with The Cavalry. 

He was lucky he hadn’t needed surgery, and even luckier that there’d been no complications with his healing. According to the newest articles you read as you scrolled online that night, Caleb was correct and the team was aiming to have Jack re-activated by the following weekend so that he could finish the final 7 weeks of the season in the majors. Which is where he deserves to be.

You sighed and rolled onto your side, eyes still on the screen - and on a picture of Jack that had been taken a week or two earlier during a Statesman season ticket holder event. He was grinning from behind the bar, one hand holding a glass and the other pulling on a tap to pour someone a drink. 

“Enough.” You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of your nose with your free hand. Doing a deep dive on Jack wasn’t going to change anything, even if it was keeping you occupied as you wound down for the night.

But before you put the phone down and rolled in the opposite direction, you couldn’t help opening his instagram page and checking his tagged photos, just to see if the woman from next to you had posted the picture like she said she would. 

There were countless pictures of Jack in his uniform posted - everything from on-field screenshots to pictures of him with his teammates and family - but those were dotted with more personal ones; people tagging him in photos of themselves, edited photos, or photos of Jack alone that had been taken from other sources. You didn’t have far to scroll before you found the picture of Jack and the woman, tapping it with one finger to make it bigger. 

She’d put more than one filter on it, smoothing out her features and his, and when you zoomed in on it, you wrinkled your nose. Why would you filter him? He doesn’t need it. Even with the filtering, you could see the bored look in Jack’s eyes, his smile small and tight. Not like it was with Caleb. 

She’d captioned the picture with a black and a yellow heart bracketing the number 7, and it already had more than a few likes. She also had a story, and even though you knew that she’d be able to see who viewed it, you didn’t care, hesitating for only a second before tapping on it. 

The girl - whose name was Brittany - had posted a few times throughout the game; pictures from in her seat, a video of Jack walking up to the plate, her grinning at the camera at the end of the game with the scoreboard behind her… but the final story post was clearly a picture of a parking lot with a tall fence around it, and what looked like a security guard in the corner. She went to the lot. 

You sighed, backing out of the story - and her profile - and going back to Jack’s, eyes lingering on his account’s picture. You followed him, and had for years - liking and commenting on the pictures he posted as well as tagging him and the other players in the occasional ones you’d taken at games. He’d never replied or acknowledged them in any way, though. 

And he won’t, you admitted to yourself as you closed out of the app and opened your alarm, making sure that it was set. “Good luck, Jack.” Closing your eyes after setting the device down on your bedside table, you rolled away from it and got comfortable. As you settled in, you let your thoughts wander back to earlier - to the way Jack’s eyes had warmed when he’d smiled at you, and the way his smile had widened when he saw you and Caleb sitting in his seats. 

You would have been lying if you’d said that the memories didn’t make you feel good. It didn’t matter that he’d likely smiled at hundreds of others in the same way. He’d made the night special for you and for Caleb, and that was the important thing. 

It didn’t take you long to fall asleep - and Jack followed you into your dreams… which you didn’t mind at all. 

— 

You didn’t have a meeting until 10:30 the following morning and so you slept in a little, taking a shower and getting dressed before you even checked your messages. 

There were a few from Erin, asking for details, and you promised you’d reach out once you had a break. But before then, you needed to focus and settled in in front of your laptop, clicking open your first email of the day. Back at it. 

You worked steadily until almost 1 PM, checking things off of your to-do list and scheduling a second consultation with the same client for the end of the following week. You typically worked virtually - and had since your uncle had hired you a few years prior - but there were occasional accounts that required your presence in person. And this one’s going to be one of them. 

That wasn’t an issue. Their offices were located in New Orleans, and you were looking forward to potentially spending a few paid days in the city. But we’ll see. 

While you waited for your lunch to heat, you called Erin, your friend picking up on the second ring and groaning into your ear. “Whatever happened yesterday must have been incredible because Caleb hasn’t shut up since he woke up this morning.” 

“It was pretty great, Erin,” Taking a seat at your kitchen table, you laughed. “I sent him the pictures, did he -”

“He’s already set the one of him and Jack as his phone background. And he’s been bugging me to take him to get them printed.” You weren’t surprised; Caleb loved baseball, and the opportunity that he’d had at the game the previous night had likely meant the world to him. “So how did that happen? He just offered you the tickets?” 

“Pretty much. He stopped to sign for Caleb, and just out of nowhere, asked where we were sitting.” You wet your lips, laughing. “And then once he knew we were in the outfield seats, he just … pointed at the dugout and told us that we could sit in his instead.” 

“He offered them to Caleb? Or to -”

“Well… sort of.” You stood, looking out your back window. “He asked your brother where we were sitting but he was looking at me when he offered the tickets…” You pulled your food out of the microwave and set it down to cool. “And then when we were in the seats, he made eye contact with me a couple times, but -”

“How hot is he up close?” You snorted, but she continued. “Because that picture of him and Caleb? That man’s hand is -”

“Really hot.” Humming in agreement, you reached for a fork. “And he seemed really nice, too. Paid more attention to the kids than to the adults. There was this girl sitting next to us and she was clearly trying to catch his eye, but he barely looked at her.” You figured that he was a professional and wouldn’t have done anything to jeopardize his reputation while on the field - and in front of younger fans. But still. She made it obvious. “He was polite, but he was just … going through the motions.” 

She hummed again, the sound non-committal as you took your first bite. “But not with you. And not with Caleb.” No, I guess not. “You should post those pictures and tag him.”

“Erin, I’m not trying to -”

“No, just hear me out. Maybe he’ll see them. And maybe he’ll remember you. And maybe he’ll -”

“Erin, come on. That’s a fantasy. I’m sure he’s got a million people tagging him every day. He won’t even see it if I do.” 

“You never know. It can’t hurt.” She said your name, the tone teasing. “And since Caleb’s account is private since he’s twelve, it makes sense you’d post ‘em for him. He really had a lot of fun with you. He’s already asking if you want to go to a game again.”

“Yeah. There’s still a little over a month left this season, so I’m sure we can figure out a weekend to see the Statesman. I’ll third wheel with you and Troy.” She laughed at that, agreeing. “I’m going to go, though. I need to eat. I have to run and analyze metrics for two campaigns this afternoon, and it’s going to take forever.” 

You hung up soon after, but as you ate, you contemplated what she’d said about posting the pictures. It was really no different than any of the other games you’d been to or posted about. You’d taken pictures that weren’t of Jack, and those could go up, too. Why not post the one of him and Caleb? It’s a good picture. 

After sending the final email for the day, you shut your laptop and changed into more comfortable clothes before stretching out on the couch. You needed to go to the store, but figured it could wait til later … and you had pictures to post. 

You chose five of them - one of the field from the concourse, one of the scoreboard, a picture from the seats, and then two of Jack and Caleb - one while he was signing and the other of them looking at the camera, which you made the main image. Choosing a caption was harder than picking the pictures themselves, but you finally opted for something extremely neutral: First @The_Cavalry game of the season. Great game, even better seats, and @CalebOnBase got to meet his favorite player. 

You tagged the picture - adding Jack and The Statesman’s accounts - and thought about adding one of Jack’s walk up songs to the post. No. That looks too desperate. So you posted it without, taking one final look at the images - and lingering on Jack’s smile - before you checked the Cavalry’s account to see if they’d posted that night’s lineup. 

Jack was starting again, but instead of being in at 3rd, he was the designated hitter. So he’ll get to bat, but can save his arm. It made sense, and you figured that if all went well, he’d only play in a game or two more before being called back up to the majors. And he’ll be back here. It made you smile, and the expression widened when you got a comment on the post from Caleb - four baseballs and the thumbs up emoji. 

You’d done your part, and that was that. Caleb could see that you’d posted the photos, and if by chance Jack saw the tag, he’d also see that you appreciated the seats he’d allowed you to sit in. With one final look at the pictures, you nodded and then sat up, sighing. 

“Alright. Grocery shopping’s not going to do itself.”

— 

You were stunned the next afternoon when you got an alert that The Cavalry tagged you in a story, and didn’t even try to hold back your grin when you saw that they’d reposted your pictures. You got a comment from their account a few seconds later - Glad you had a great time, thanks for coming! - the words accompanied by a blue heart and a baseball. 

After sending the link to Erin so that she could show her brother, you set your phone down, returning to the work you were doing. You stayed busy throughout the rest of the day, and even though your phone kept lighting up with new alerts - strangers liking the pictures and commenting on your post, it didn’t break your focus. 

And by the following day, things were pretty much back to normal. The story was gone, strangers weren’t still finding your profile, and you’d opted to work for most of Saturday morning to get ahead, which meant that you could take Monday off. And I can take a nap. I haven’t been able to do that in weeks. 

You pulled the drapes shut and then climbed into bed, the darkened room helping you to relax much faster than you anticipated. There was no need to set an alarm, and so you didn’t, figuring that you’d wake up on your own when you got hungry… which you did, just after 6 PM. Maybe I’ll order food. I don’t feel like cooking. 

You stretched, pointing your toes, and then reached for your phone, mentally flipping through restaurant options. But you froze with the device in front of your face as the screen lit up, eyes zeroing in on the alert in the center of it. 

Whiskey_Jack7 liked your post

---

[sideprince]

18, 19 and 20 for Snape?

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

I don't admire it, per say, but I'm really curious about the relationship he has with Filch. Snape seems to be one of the few people who gets along with Filch, and vice versa. I have a half-baked meta in my drafts about this, and who knows when I'll get to it, but I've been wondering for a long time about whether there's a connection between Snape and Filch's amicable relationship and the fact the Weasley twins stole the Marauder's Map from Filch's office. In Deathly Hallows, when McGonagall tells Filch to get Peeves and Filch is confused, she tells him, “Yes, Peeves, you fool, Peevesl Haven’t you been complaining about him for a quarter of a century? Go and fetch him, at once!” This would imply that, even if she's rounding his years as caretaker up or down a few years, Filch has been at Hogwarts since the mid-1970s, so it makes sense he would have confiscated the map directly from the Marauders. Given what we can guess about how much that map may have aided them in deliberately targeting Snape, I'm curious how much he knew about it (especially given his reaction when he confiscated it from Harry in PoA, where he asks Lupin with deliberate emphasis, about Harry getting the map "directly from the manufacturers").

I'm curious about Snape's relationship with Filch, especially when considering that he may have seen Filch as someone useful to him, or maybe even aligned with his sense of rules and their role in protecting students.

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

His relationship with Wormtail just feels weak and like it wasn't well thought through. In PoA we see Snape become feral with rage and trauma when he corners Sirius in the Shrieking Shack. It's not until the end of the last book that we realize how much of this reaction wasn't really about childhood bullying, but about his thinking that Sirius sent Voldemort after the Potters and now wants to harm Harry. Surely when Snape returned to Voldemort at the end of GoF and realized Pettigrew was alive and Sirius' story was true, that rage would have bubbled up again. Especially considering that Wormtail had taken an active part in aiding Voldemort's regeneration and attempt to kill Harry. But in HBP when Wormtail is relegated to be a servant to Snape (presumably to spy on him for Voldemort) there's just something off about Snape's passive aggression.

I just can't imagine that in the whole intervening year Snape wouldn't have used all his cunning and influence with Voldemort to get rid of Wormtail or at least push him far enough down the ladder to be below the disgraced Malfoys. Even after Snape kills Dumbledore, Wormtail is serving in Malfoy Manor and still a DE. His role seems to be more focused on serving the plot and the eventual need for Harry to cash in on the IOU for saving Wormtail's life in an opportune moment, than on all the other moving pieces Rowling (boo, hiss) has established. I just don't buy it that Snape, who rises within a short time from being perceived as a traitor by Voldemort and marked for death to being his foremost trusted ally, whose whole arc is informed by Lily's death and his oath to protect her son, wouldn't use his position and influence to be more vindictive towards the guy whose betrayal led Voldemort to her door and who spent their whole time at school together avidly revelling in watching his friends bully and torture him. Even Snape's attitude of saving anyone he can doesn't seem to play into this, because Wormtail has proven himself to be ruthless and dangerous, so wouldn't getting rid of him serve to protect others?

The whole relationship feels very half-baked to me.

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

Lily. Even in the small glimpses we get of her, and the bits and pieces we hear from other characters (like when Slughorn says she was cheeky), it's clear why they were best friends. They grew up together, they were both snarky and clever and curious and out of place in their families. I get why they were so close, at least for as long they were.

[pattywagon2go]

FixTF2: What Happened, Why Did Valve Step In, And What Comes Next?

DISCLAIMER: I am in no way affiliated with neither Valve nor the people who run the FixTF2 petition. Do not treat anything I say here as any official announcement of any future plans for the movement. All my thoughts and opinions are mine and mine alone.

As of the making of this post, the save.tf has officially closed down to new signatures, racking up a generous 343,711 total signatures. I've made my thoughts on FixTF2 clear in the past, where I said that I didn't have much hope that Valve would actually do something, but to my surprise, Valve seemed to have finally stepped in and done something about the bot issue plaguing the game for 5 straight years beyond the usual half-assed band-aid fix. In light of Valve surprising me, I want to talk about what's happened, some speculation as to why Valve is potentially doing this, and what I think comes next from all of this.

So, let's clear some stuff up: Is Casual really bot-free?

From what I've seen and heard, yes!

Starting around June 25th, multiple sources reported a massive drop in the active player count for Team Fortress 2 from Steam Charts, being around 15,000-16,000 users vanishing overnight. Many people suspect this to be a large-scale ban wave Valve enacted, and there is a large amount of evidence to support this. (More info from this video by shounic here) Since then, up until the day this post is being written (July 1st 2024), people have reported that Casual servers across all regions have been fairly bot-free, with only the occasional one popping up, a far cry from a month ago, where servers were flooded with them no matter where you went. I myself even hopped on a few games and to my surprise, there were no bots to be found whatsoever. Its honestly been super refreshing to see the game be this clean, as now its actually fun to play once again. I haven't touched the game in months, but since the bots have been kicked out for a little bit, it feels good to play once more. If you haven't played the game for a while cause of the bots, now's your chance to hop in and enjoy the game. Its actually fun to play now that the bots have been squashed. On top of that, (as of the time this post is being written), Valve appears to still be actively curbing cheaters and bots from the game, even setting up a dedicated Steam support page for anyone who gets a game ban here.

So, why's Valve doing any of this?

This is where I'm going to step into speculation territory, as Valve being Valve means there's barely any information they will share with the public, but I'll do my best to come up with some logical explanations. I would say that Valve doing a ban wave has both a short-term goal and a long-term goal. The short-term goal was Valve was always intending to do a ban wave, it just took a while to do. What I think happened was Valve took a while to collect a database of known bot accounts and (presumably) their hosters, and from there, once Valve felt they were comfortable with the amount they had collected, they pulled the trigger and proceeded to wipe them out. They obviously couldn't just outright say "Hey, we're gonna do a wipe of the bots soon" because that would have given the hosters plenty of time to set up proactive measures to make Valve's job harder. The only evidence I really have for this is the dropoff of players on Steam Charts, which shows around 15k-16k players mysteriously disappeared from the game, which seems to point to Valve issuing a game ban toward said accounts/deleting them entirely. Alternatively, Valve could have banned a limited amount of accounts, much lower than the 15-16k shown by Steam Charts, but it sent a scare to hosters who deactivated their bots and took them off the game once they knew Valve was watching them, but this explanation I don't have much evidence to prove beyond scattered Discord screenshots of supposed hosters telling people to change their bot configurations due to Valve clamping down on them. The long-term goal of this, though far-fetched and lacking evidence to support, could have to do with Deadlock, their next game, as a proactive measure to prevent these same malicious actors from flooding the game on Day 1, something many people have pointed out and what's happened to CS2 not even a year into its launch.

(UPDATE: Ok I might as well address this cause it did come up while I was writing the post, but a Team Fortress 2 DLC for an upcoming Funko Pop game called Funko Fusion was announced, and people have said that the only reason why Valve squashed the bots was because Valve wanted the game to look good in time for the crossover.

Now I am by no means a fan of Funko Pop, I think they look a bit ugly and there's a myriad of other things people take issue with, but that's all outside the scope of this post. I personally don't care that this is happening to begin with, as Funko Pops are something I routinely forget about, so as far as the DLC existing, I don't care that much. That being said, if it is true that Valve only squashed bots due to this collab happening to begin with, then that is pretty sad and disappointing to see, with how Valve wasn't motivated to fix the issue until a different company came knocking and asked them to do something cause they didn't want the DLC to look bad. But since there's no confirmation this is the case, Valve does have some level of plausible deniability here, and ultimately, something good did come from this, at a (to me, cause I couldn't give a shit about Funko) nonexistant cost so I won't complain)

So now time to return to the last part of the question in the title: What comes next?

Well for one thing, the war has not been won yet.

A big mistake with SaveTF2 was once Valve tweeted that they apparently "heard" us and were working to improve things, people largely declared victory and chose to stop there. Yet things didn't substantially improve since then, only cascading into a far worse situation. This time around, we cannot give up as quickly as last time. We are on the cusp of victory, but we need to keep the pressure on Valve. Keep holding them accountable for the bot issue. Put pressure on them to get rid of the bots for good. Don't let them off the hook and give them a slap on the wrist for only repelling the bots for a little bit, because believe me, as soon as Valve stops doing anything and slinks back into the shadows, the bots will return, and they will be far worse than anything we've seen thus far. It happened two years ago, it will happen again if we just declare victory now and go home. What Valve is doing is a great change of pace and they do deserve some praise for what they're doing, but we must make sure they stay committed to fixing the issue at hand. The best time for Valve to fix the issue was 5 years ago. The second best time is here and now. For now, hop on a few games and enjoy the (relatively) clean servers. We've earned a small break after our victory, but once you're done, make sure to grab your best bot-stomping boots, because our job is far from over.

[chronicbeans]

Hazbin Rewrite - Angel Dust

I've made a few big changes here and made a few early concepts of Angel much more prominent (mainly his drag queen performances). For one, Angel is not under a contract with Valentino, but Val is actively pursuing a contract at the moment. That, and Angel is half Italian half Russian and lived in the USSR, which has an effect on his personality in the afterlife.

TW: Mentions of the USSR and Communism, Period Accurate Homophobia/Internalized Homophobia, Sex Work, VALENTINO, Mentions of Drugs, Brief Mention of Gender Dysphoria, I changed his real name to Anatoly to fit his new home country

In life, Anatoly worked as a drag queen and gay prostitute during the 1940s, sometimes stealing a few extra Russian Rubles from his clients when his family was in hard times. This was dangerous work, considering the USSR banned male homosexuality in the 1930s, and prostitution was already illegal, but he wanted to pursue it. It was his way of trying to make extra income for his family as well as try to express himself. He kept it as secret as he possibly could. He never really saw his homosexuality, sex work, and drag as a problem until he did get caught. He ended up passing away during his "5 years of hard labor". He was ratted out by his father, who got scared the rest of his family would be punished for housing him.

In Hell, his sins are homosexuality and sex work. However, it's important to realize that my rewrite's version of sin is individualized to what the person perceived as wrong or sinful in life. There's many people in Hell for things like sex work, homosexuality, or being transgender not because it is bad, but because they themselves perceived it as such. There's also plenty of of people in Heaven who are transgender, homosexual, or sex workers because they didn't see being those things as bad while they were alive. It just so happens that there's an influx of people during around the 1600's - 1900's who were taught that these things are sinful, so a lot of the people in there for things like homosexuality are from those time periods. In turn, a lot of the never generations or people from around the time period of ancient Greece or the Roman Empire who are a part of the LGBTQ+/sex workers are in Heaven, simply because they didn't get taught those things or never believed them when people tried.

So, while he may be in Hell for homosexuality, it's not because God sees it as a bad thing. God doesn't really care who you're attracted to, since He loves all his children. Angel is in Hell for homosexuality because he, himself, saw it as a bad thing when he died. Due to the horrible treatment given to him once he was ratted out, he began thinking that there must be something wrong with him if he "deserved" such treatment for it.

In Hell, Anatoly has taken on his drag name, Angel Dust, due to preferring to dress in drag rather than casual clothes when he goes outside. He also much prefers to go by "she" while in drag, even though he identifies as a cis man, because he plays up a character while in drag. A lot of people tend to mistake him for a trans woman because of this, but he doesn't mind because it proves to him his drag is good.

Angel Dust is not in a contract with Val currently, but Val is actively trying to get him into one. He's been saying his club is a safe space for all LGBTQ+ folks, saying that the pornographic material is their way of showing off their pride. In actuality, it's Val's way of profiting off of the fear and insecurities of LGBTQ+ people he comes across. Angel Dust, however, hasn't accepted it because of his own idea that he's somehow massively flawed for being gay. He does hang out with Val, though, due to Val making a safe persona and hiding his true colors from Angel Dust. So, Angel Dust doesn't necessarily see any reason to fear or stay away from Valentino.

Angel Dust isn't into any hardcore drugs while in Hell, nor was he while in life. However, he does smoke papirosa cigarettes, which in the USSR smoking was condemned, even if it wasn't necessarily illegal during the 1940s. It's mostly due to his life in the USSR being extremely strict, which has affected his afterlife heavily. He has many internalized fears, which as he overcomes them may spiral into him getting into drugs and accepting Valentino's contract.

Angel Dust is also a communist. He's from the USSR, so it's basically a given. This has a huge effect on his relationships with others in the Hazbin Hotel. Even if Angel Dust did do illegal activities while he was alive, he wasn't immune to any propaganda that the USSR spread to its citizens. So, when he meets actively greedy or capitalistic guests and staff members, he is much more likely to have a distaste for them or their ideals. Due to this, Charlie and/or Rebecca are often trying to diffuse fights between Angel and other members of the hotel, especially Baxter, Alastor, or Husk.

Angel Dust's native tongue is Russian, and due to having never learned English in life and good English classes being hard to come across in Hell, his English is slightly broken at times. In fact, he used the drag name Angel Dust simply because it sounded cool to him, without knowing the fact it was slang for drugs. His thought process was that he knew what angel meant, and he had heard from friends that dusty or dust was sometimes used by English speakers to describe how powdered blush felt. He has a thick accent, as well, making some of the other members have a hard time understanding his words at times. The only one who actively tries to figure out ways to better communicate with him is Husk, even though Angel often fights with him. Since Husk was alive and fought in the British Army alongside some USSR soldiers, he already has a slight advantage over others in understanding Angel both in terms of his personality and literal speech. So, whilst they have their differences and Angel may dislike him, Husk is still actively trying to get along with him.

Angel's form in Hell is humanoid, with an appearance similar to that of his drag persona. However, while in life he'd wear a chest piece to create a bust, Angel now just naturally has one, much to his slight dismay. It's caused a slight sense of gender dysphoria whenever he's outside of drag and people mistake him for a woman, which is another reason why he wears drag often. It gives him a reason to believe that they're mistaken not for his chest, but for the rest of his drag persona's appearance. He has four eyes, two where a human's would be, and two smaller ones at the edge of his small eyebrows. Then, he has four spider legs at this hips, which he uses as a hoop skirt when he wears more extravagant dresses. He keeps his pale pink hair long, which feels less like hair and more like fur. He also tries to wear blush to give color to his pale skin.

Fun fact: I originally decided to make him half Italian and half Russian just to give the guests a bit more variety in culture. However, once I remembered that I was keeping his death date in the 1940s, I realized I accidentally dropped him smack dab into the USSR 😭. However, I kept it because the idea of living in a society that hates you for who you are impacting someone so heavily after death was something I had already been planning for someone else, and it makes sense for multiple characters to go through such a thing.

[herejusttosufferalong]

Y'all, I've been glued to this saga because L and R are so similar to what I went thru with my ex, like down to the sleeping on the couch thing, only reversed, that I don't know whether to laugh or cry. A and S don't know what they're in for.

Storytime: My ex's Rory is called Mike and they met playing a sport in college when X was a freshman and M was a super senior, so he's ~4 years older. M took X under his wing and they became bros for life I guess. M is super nice and goofy but a hot mess as a person, can't be trusted with the simplest of tasks but gets by by being beloved by everyone. X has consistently thrown him bones, brought him on to projects and recommended him for gigs at the expense of his own career and reputation. You can't make this shit up.

X and I were long distance for the first ~year of the relationship, I moved out to him to a small ass town an hour away from anywhere because of his job and because it was cheap. We were in a 1bd apartment and the first little while was bliss, hot and heavy, amazing. It was my first time living with a partner. Maybe a few months in, M calls X - he got a job in the city an hour away and he's moving down. X gets the brilliant idea to invite him to stay on our couch until he finds a place. I was fine with it at first because he was a super nice guy but I had no idea what I was getting into. Ladies, when I tell you I became the 3rd wheel in my own relationship and a ghost in my own home, I'm not being dramatic.

I was working from home so I was alone all day in a town where I knew no one who wasn't connected to X in some way and when the two of them would get home, they'd bro out with each other and I basically had to compete for my bf's attention. We stopped doing anything that didn't include him and constantly had to be mindful about how loud we were in the bedroom because he was on the fucking couch. I couldn't relax in my own home that I was paying rent and bills for. Mind you, M at this point was further along in his career than X and making way more money. Two months pass, he still hasn't found a place and instead commutes an hour each way to work. Then the fucking pandemic hits. I was the only one working initially and I was at home with the two of them playing video games, working out, watching TV, yelling, laughing, on TT, on Zoom with their other buddies 24/7 while I was trying to work. We'd constantly end up doing whatever they wanted to do. Dude stayed on our couch for like 10 1/2 months, only paying for groceries, takeout and activities here and there. I kinda snapped during the holidays, I drove across the country alone to be with my family and didn't go back, my dad then made a round trip to go get my stuff because I just couldn't even look at X. Only then did it occur to X and M that maybe M should move out. But you know what the narrative in his friend group is about me? That I'm a cold bitch who broke his heart.

I look back on it now and I'm angry at myself for being such a dummy, I was a total pushover. My X wasn't a bad dude, he was just too much of a bro to know how to be a bf. He always felt a need to include everyone but that cut into the little time we had together. In my defense, he was really hot lol.

It's crazy to think how different my life is now with my fiance, we just bought a house earlier this spring, which wouldn't have been possible with my X because he spends all his money on his hobbies. X literally did the same HBS thing L did after I dumped him, hit the gym like crazy, he follows like a thousand half naked girls on IG, likes all their posts and thirsts in the comments, it's beyond cringe. This is also on his fully public IG account that he also uses for work. He hasn't been in a serious relationship since, I'm told he's become quite the fboy, but he's collected a seemingly infinite amount of new bros judging by his posts. M is still in the picture, of course, although he has his own place and a serious gf now, while my ex has a new roommate who he plays an expensive, niche equipment sport with that he spends every penny he earns on. My ex was a Leo, so I'm not surprised L has it prominently in his chart.

This stuff is not uncommon among younger Millennial men. My now fiance is 5 years older and he is a Man. He shows up for me the way I show up for him, he doesn't make plans without considering me and he's on top of his finances. He's a serious person. I never knew I could be at peace like this. I know what I'm building towards with him. A and S are just sidepieces to the main love story that is L and R and if/when one of them gets dumped, the other one will as well. They're there because they go along with what L and R want. It'll come back to bite them in the ass but they'll learn an invaluable lesson the way that I did - don't date a manchild who won't prioritize you over his friends.

some good advice for the youngins

thank you for sharing 💜🥃

[notbecauseofvictories]

Halloween Week of Horror (Games)

It's that time of year, and as someone who (a) loves horror, but (b) hasn't had much of an appetite lately for full-length horror films, I've been struggling to find a way to embrace spooky season. Then I hit on it---text-based games!

Even I, a known video game hater, love a good text-based game. Half poetry, half clicking, and all artistry, they're one of the great, underdiscussed treasures of the modern internet. Therefore, come join me for a week of indie horror "games" about haunted houses, ghosts, secrets kept, and also Mary Toft.

My list of games is cribbed from this post and this post.

DAY 1: childhood homes (and why we hate them), vacant, i am still here, flesh, blood, & concrete, domvs

childhood homes (and why we hate them) 

after a decade, you return home

Starting with this particular game was ingenious---it plays to exactly my weaknesses: poetry, unreliable narrators, unhappy families, and the house as locus of memory/witness to horror/horror in itself.

That being said, I feel like this would reward subsequent walkthroughs even more. I took it too quickly, wanted to rush to the end when there’s too much ambiguity for that. Did Lottie kill her father? Is the house still whole and there, even after all these years, or is that a fever dream? How long was her returning? Is she there still? (....and given the mention of the house being a “second son” are we meant to understand that Lottie is trans?) I also played “my brother; the parasite” from this same creator, and would say it's even better---that kind of identity/body horror ambiguity, wrapped up in twisted maybe-love, maybe-hate, is very much my speed.

SPOOKY LEVEL: 6/10, though it's largely uncanny and reality-bending rather than actively frightening

OVERALL GRADE: A-

vacant 

Film a ghost-hunting show.

Of all the games on this list, this one felt the most lived in, the most normal-devolving-into-horror. The set-up is reasonably familiar: you are a camera woman hired at the last minute to help a ghost-hunter with her local shoot. You meet her out in what seems to be the middle of nowhere, explore an abandoned hotel that was home to some weird stuff (cults, mysterious disappearances, more than one death), crack some sarcastic jokes---

Unfortunately, it gets even weirder at that point.

Despite getting tripped up on some of the mechanics (it took me too long to figure out that there was another room on the main level) this ended up being haunting, resisting easy answers. The sudden randomness of the violence bursts through, and the ending in particular is sharp, lovely, and even more unsettling.

SPOOKY LEVEL: 4/10, aside from some sudden noises (things breaking, etc.) the horror is largely atmospheric

OVERALL GRADE: B

i am still here 

a short, unconventional ghost story and vignette reflecting on the end of a long lockdown.

Unlike some of the other entries on this list, this is not a horror game at all. Perhaps a little uncanny, since it's just you---a purple thing on a screen---wandering around a pandemic-emptied Melbourne, musing about the way the world has changed. Still, as someone who did live through lockdown, it was surprising affective.

Brief, but moving. When the screen fades to teal blue, and it’s just the ambient noise of a small pond? That was lovely.

SPOOKY LEVEL: 0/10

OVERALL GRADE: B

flesh, blood, & concrete

you find yourself in a vast, empty apartment complex.

I have gone back and forth on this one. On one hand, the central story is affective---the main character's car runs out of gas in an unnamed town, in the middle of a snow storm; she finds help in a strange apartment complex, seemingly abandoned except for a lone girl, and her "parents." The more you explore the complex, the more you reveal about the woman's intentions, and the more uncanny, unworldly, the scenery becomes.

(I would have given anything to “see” the scenes of destruction, decay and otherworldliness in full color---even in 24-bit, they were lovely.)

On the other hand, the concept and the worldbuilding had such potential that the "frame" story (a little boy, sent out to play in the snow) and the ending came as something of a let-down? Or...maybe not the ending itself (a melancholy, depressed woman driving off into the snow and being swallowed alive by meat that is love---that's a good story) but the framing device made no sense. And why could you collect items if the aim is to surrender to that powerful, overall lure?

Still, I think the replay value here would be immense. Scrolling through the comments afterwards, there are a lot of people who got very different endings, so it's a game that rewards that exploratory path.

SPOOKY LEVEL: 6/10, and mostly for body horror (meat/blood) and uncanny worldbuilding

OVERALL GRADE: B+

domvs 

a gothic mystery game in which you rely on your environment to uncover the truth.

A lovely little story, where you play madlibs and discover why an unnamed hero chose to sell their soul to the devil—and the thing it makes them into, the tragedy that finds them regardless. One of the shorter entries on this list, and less a game than wandering through an abandoned house to admire its poetry.

Also, I loved the Latin. More games should incorporate Latin.

SPOOKY LEVEL: 2/10

OVERALL GRADE: B

[walesfootball]

Nobody Else - Guro Reiten x Reader

It's been a while. Sorry. I've got a new job and been studying a lot so haven't had time to write, but I'm getting used to juggling everything so should be okay now. Thank you for your patience! I'll hopefully get to everyone's requests soon, but I thought I'd get something I wanted to write out in the world first. Hope you enjoy!

You were awful at coming up with dates. That was always Guro’s forte. She always knew the best places to eat, and the best activities to do, and was the best planner. You, on the other hand, liked to leave her to it. Guro loved coming up with dates for the both of you, and you were happy going along with her for anything and everything. That was until your two-year anniversary. The perfect idea came to mind of you actually organising a date. It was hard because you hadn’t needed to plan a date for those two years. It would be special if you did something. It would be unexpected and you knew that Guro would love it.

You quickly realised how hard it was to come up with a perfect date. How did Guro make it look so easy?

Fancy restaurant? The anniversary was on a Saturday and waiting until the last minute to plan something might not have been the best idea. So you had to scrap that idea. You didn’t know anyone who owned a restaurant like in films, so it was a no-go.

Maybe an activity like bowling or the cinema? As much as Guro would love that, maybe you should step it up a little as it’s the second anniversary.

You stayed lying on the floor of your and Guro’s flat. You were out of ideas already. The ceiling looked like a more interesting body of work than what you had going on in your mind. You were in such deep thought you hadn’t realised Guro had made her way into the flat from training and was staring at you from the other side of the living room. She assumed you had fallen asleep after a training session of your own that morning.

She moved closer to see your eyes open and your hands resting behind your head. Her eyebrows ruffled up as she placed her bag down next to you.

“Are you okay?” Guro smiled as your body startled up from its position.

“You scared the absolute shit out of me!” You held on to your heart dramatically as you sat up to have a good look at her, a smirk now on your face.

“Sorry. But seriously, are you okay?” Guro laughed this time.

“Yeah. I was just in my own world.” You laughed back as she joined you on the floor. Guro brought down the blanket placed on the sofa and wrapped it around the both of you. You pulled her closer to you, as Guro leaned in as much as she could into your warmth. These are the moments you cherished the most. Just you and Guro alone. And it was then that you decided that a date at home was perfect.

“You know for Saturday? You haven’t planned anything have you?” You wanted to check to make sure, in case Guro inevitably made plans.

“Um… no, not yet.” Her hand placed over your heart as half her body laid across yours. Guro’s face had tucked itself into your neck.

Before she could offer to plan something you jumped in, “Okay good because I thought I could do something for us.”

Guro’s head lifted up in surprise to see if you were serious, “Really?”

You chuckled at this, “Yeah. You always do it so it’s the least I could do.”

“Okay… I’m excited now.”

The both of you stayed on the floor for a while, talking about training at Chelsea and Arsenal respectively.

Saturday arrived and you were both up early ready for your games. Arsenal had an early kick-off against Reading, while Chelsea was at home to Aston Villa at 3. You knew you had time to prepare everything you needed for the date. You were excited, which didn’t go unnoticed by your team.

“You look happy. Excited to play Reading or something?” Caitlin teased you.

“It’s mine and Guro’s two-year anniversary.” You smiled up at Caitlin which she returned.

“What are you two doing for it?”

“I was going to cook her some dinner.” You hadn’t stopped smiling ever since you’d woken up with Guro buried in your side. Her soft snores were the only sound in the room. Your alarm had gone off which you quickly turned off, not wanting to disturb her sleep. She moved impossibly closer to your body and took a deep breath. It was impossible for you to leave that bed without feeling bad. The furrow in her eyebrows and the frown on her lips as you left the warm bed was enough to make you feel awful.

Lia walked over to you and Caitlin, overhearing the conversation, “Are you doing anything else?”

“Um… maybe watch a film. I was going to put the fire on outside on the balcony so we could roast some marshmallows. And watch the sun go down.” You shrugged towards Lia.

“That’s so cute.” Caitlin had sat down next to you as everyone was getting changed into their kits for the game. She bumped her shoulder gently against yours.

“Have you thought about maybe proposing to her?” Lia raised her eyebrows with a grin.

“I mean…” you stumbled over your words.

“Have you two talked about it?”

“Yeah. A few times. It’s something we both want.” Your hands started sweating slightly as you realised maybe Guro had been waiting for you to pop the question.

“You two have been together for two years now, it’s the perfect time to ask her,” Lia exclaimed.

“I’m not asking her without a ring. I’ll ask her on her birthday.” You shrugged it off again, you had planned tonight perfectly and needed to plan a proposal perfectly. That could wait.

“When is her birthday?” Caitlin asked.

“July.”

“That’s ages away! It’s literally November now.” Lia stressed to you.

“Fine. I’ll ask her on Christmas.” That seemed doable to you. It gave you time to pick out a ring.

“Please do because you two are perfect for each other,” Lia said. You smiled at the thought knowing there was no one else for you. You couldn’t wait for the game to end just so you could get home in time to watch her game.

——

The game ended with a win for Arsenal. A goal scored by you and an assist. 2-0. You were over the moon, but quickly got changed and almost ran home. You cursed yourself for not learning to drive. It was never something on your mind, you were perfectly fine with cycling and walking. Now seemed like the best time to drive so you could make it home in time to watch Guro play and prepare everything.

You’d turned the game on your laptop so you could watch the game in the kitchen while you prepare tea. Chelsea had played well and had won. You were happy for Guro but wanted Arsenal to win the league. Something you and Guro had many conversations about.

It took just over an hour for Guro to arrive back home. You had just finished draining the pasta when you heard the door close. You turned around in time to see Guro making her way into the kitchen with her classic big grin on her face. She walked up to you, kissing you slowly, her right hand holding your cheek.

“I’ve missed you. I couldn’t wait for the game to finish.” Guro smiled into the kiss. You placed the bowl of pasta down on the counter to hold Guro closer. Your hands snaked around her waist as hers went around your shoulders.

“Same. I’m making your favourite,” You smiled as she bit her lower lip in excitement. “Sit down. It’s literally done.”

You put the pasta and sauce on two plates and made your way over to the small dining table in the kitchen. You went back to collect the bottle of white wine and poured two glasses.

“Happy two-year anniversary to my favourite person in the world.” You raised your glass up towards her.

“Happy two years, baby. I hope you know you’re stuck with me.” She smiled as she did the same with her glass, staring at you with wonder in her eyes.

“I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

The both of you continued to finish the food. You left the dishes on the table, thinking to yourself that you’d wash them later. You held onto Guro’s hand and guided her out to the balcony where you’d placed pillows and blankets on the small outdoor sofa you owned, along with a small fire pit.

“I thought we could roast some marshmallows and look at the sun going down.” You held onto the pink packet of marshmallows with a blush creeping onto your cheeks as Guro offered you a cute look.

“This is one of the cutest things you’ve ever done. And you do a lot of cute things.” Guro sat down and covered herself with blankets. The London air wasn’t kind, it was a chilly evening but it wasn’t raining! And that was rare.

“I kept checking the weather over the last few days hoping and praying that it wouldn’t rain because otherwise, I’d be all out of ideas.”

“I take it back. You checking the weather constantly to make sure it wouldn’t rain is the cutest thing you’ve ever done.” Guro laughs as you set up the fire.

“You are so mean sometimes.”

Guro laughs again but leans over to kiss your pink cheek. You offer her a stick for her marshmallow as the fire blazed up.

“Are you warm enough? Do you want a coat or something? Or I can get your gloves and scarf?” You started panicking thinking your plan had gone awful as you felt her shiver next to you.

“Hey, calm down. The fire will warm us up. This is perfect.” Guro had placed her hands next to the fire to warm up her hands. She kissed your clothed shoulder and leaned her head there too. You kissed the crown of her head and leaned your head on hers.

The both of you warmed up after a while and started feeding each other marshmallows. After finishing the pack, you leaned back into the chair with Guro following your lead and resting her head on your chest, her legs swinging over yours.

“I love this. You’re quite good at planning dates.” Guro quietly said.

“You never told me how stressful it can be.”

Guro laughed gently, “It’s not stressful for me. I thought today was romantic.”

She kissed the underside of your jaw, gently nipping. Your hand moved from stroking her thigh to her cheek. You pressed a soft kiss to her lips, taking your time. The sky showed off every perfection in her face as the sun began to set; orange, yellow, and blue. Your hand traveled to the back of her head, burying your fingers in her hair, as she bit your lip and moved impossibly closer to you. You slowly pulled back from her lips, the vulnerability crossing her face whenever she was with you as if she gave her whole self to you and nothing else.

“I forgot to give you something. I got you a small present.” She kissed you again quickly as she got up off the chair.

“Now I feel bad because I didn’t get you anything.” Guro didn’t say anything as she went back into the flat, only to come back out two seconds later. She came out with her hands behind her back. You sat up in excitement.

“I knew exactly what I wanted to get you for our two-year anniversary for a while. You’re the only person for me, and I want to spend my life loving you and cherishing you. I was serious when I said you’re stuck with me.” Her arms returned to their normal position with a small red box in her right hand.

It hit you right then what she had. Guro always spoke like this so it was a surprise. She dropped down to one knee, her eyes cloudy and a tear streaming down her cheek. You, on the other hand, were a mess. You thought back on what Lia had said, but it didn’t matter now. The love of your life was in front of you, proposing.

“Will you do me the massive honour of marrying me?”

“Of course, I will!” You pulled your sleeve over your eyes to wipe the tears and stood up from the chair to face her. Guro placed the ring on your finger and jumped into your arms. The next part of the chapter for you two was just beginning and you couldn’t be happier to do life with anyone else.

[thephantomcasebook]

I'm thinking Ewan Mitchell sold his soul to Hollywood. Fucking scary how they lure young great talents like him in. Thoughts?

Look, I'm gonna tell it to you as clean as I can.

Actors and Actresses are narcissistic, shallow, neurotic, empty people, which, as a whole, can't be trusted. They'll do and say whatever it takes not just to get a role, but to get even a few more lines in a script. They are adult people that play make believe for a living because they, generally, don't like themselves and want to be someone else. To deify or put on a throne, anyone, that plays pretend for a living is plain ignorant and you're asking for your heart to be dashed.

No one enters entertainment and comes out a better person, yeah?

There is a very few actors/Actresses that are jobbing, lunch pail working performers that are good and normal people.

Michelle Dockery, Laura Carmichael, Jenna Coleman, Nikolaj Coster-Waldu, Matthew Marsden, Aiden Turner, and Sam Heughan.

The only standard you should have for an actor or actress is these three questions:

Are they respecting the character?

Are they respecting the Lore?

And - most importantly - are they respecting the fans?

I hit Olivia Cooke with the fucking truck all the time, because, Olivia Cooke does not live up to these basic principles. She doesn't care about Alicent, in fact she hates Alicent. She doesn't give a fuck about the lore, and is actively campaigning to change it to virtue signal. And she openly does not care about the fans unless their gender and sexuality gives her cashe to big-up her career.

Like I've said, you can love a character and dislike an actor/actress. I'd give my sword for Alicent Hightower ... and at the same time I think Olivia Cooke is a dishonest snake.

Same thing with Lena Headey. Lena Headey might legitimately be retarded, okay. She is so stupid that she couldn't spell "Cat" if I spotted her the "C" and the "A", right? Lena Heady also happens to check all three of the boxes. She loved playing Cersei. She respected the Lore around Cersei and didn't try to change her character to make her look better. And while she had a terrible history prior of out right abusing her own fans, she learned to appreciate the people that paid her fucking bills, in the end.

When it comes to Ewan. I wouldn't wear those clothes, and I question the manhood and self-respect of any man who wears them - gay or straight. But at the end of the day, Ewan Mitchell has a right to do whatever the fuck he wants to do. Or, more succinctly, I don't give a fuck about his or any other actor's personal lives.

What they do on their time is their business. But what they do on my time is my business. And since I'm paying a subscription for "MAX" and thus paying his fucking salary, I expect him to not waste my time with half-ass performances and hack effort, right?

But he hasn't waisted my time.

Ewan Mitchell has been a model of professionalism and passion when it comes to portraying Aemond.

He has put more thought than anyone - except for Glynn-Carney - about his character.

He is dedicated to playing the character right.

And he has been exemplary in his treatment and interaction with the fans of the show and the franchise as a whole.

And that's really all you can ask of an actor in your franchise. What he does and believes in his personal life is his affair. As long as he doesn't disrespect me than I won't disrespect him. That simple.

Once more, you guys have to stop putting actors/actresses on thrones, cause they're only human ... and, in many cases, not very good ones. Love the character, stan the character, but hold these real life people to simple standards that they should be holding themselves too.

I'm not coming down on you nonny, but I've had thirteen years of this shit on Tumblr of fangirls worshiping an actor or actress in cult like status because they like a character.

You guys have got to stop doing that, cause it only leads to bad things.

[tangledinink]

Question about your Teenage Mutant What Now AU!

Has Leo always just been in puberty blockers since forever? Because I'm assuming he never had a period in his life because, well, reptiles menstruation is laying eggs

Kinda! I've actually thought about this a lot because I had the same question and went back and forth on it for a while. tldr; Leo has been on puberty blockers for the past three+ years and has never had a full menstrual cycle, but he does menstruate rather than lay eggs, at least when he's under the effect of his bracelet. Further details abt Leo's trans experience and how the cloaking crystals work below!

Leo has been on puberty blockers since he turned twelve and went on them before he had his first period. As we've established, Yoshi just kind of discovered that Leo was afab when he put the cloaking bracelets on them for the first time and was like "fuck it I don't have the time to unpack this right now you're Leo and you're my son whatever lesgo," and that was just kinda that and everyone involved was always just down with Leo being Leo. Leo certainly never had a problem with it, and he never felt any desire to switch over to being a girl and would get pretty upset if anyone (such as teachers or other parents) suggested he may be female. As such, Yoshi has always just treated Leo as his son and is more than willing to defend him from anyone who ever questioned his identity. His brothers, likewise, have always been very defensive of Leo and quite frankly were usually confused as children if anyone tried to say Leo was their sister. 'Cause??? Like??? Literally no he's not??? He's always been our brother???

When Leo was around eleven Yoshi did sit him down to actually talk to him about it in-depth, like, 'I love you no matter what and I support your choices but we've never actually for-real talked about this and I wanna make sure this is something that you want and not just something that you went along with,' (Leo, of course, at that point doesn't realize WHY he 'came out as trans' when he was five, he just kind of figures that he must have made the decision to start presenting as masc and go by 'Leo' when he was very little and doesn't remember it now,) as well as discuss the option of puberty blockers with him and ask if that's something he wants. And Leo is 1000% like. YES, I'm sure I'm a boy and YES I want to go on puberty blockers so very much I've been dreading the concept of puberty for months now pleeeesssase let's do that. So... they do, and that's that!

(And Yoshi would have gone along with whatever Leo said, but internally he's like, OH THANK GOD, because he's also like ?!?! How tf would turtle puberty translate?! Would the cloaking crystals cover that??? Surely my son wouldn't lay FUCKING EGGS but holy shit what if he did and would I be morally obligated to warn him just in case--!?!)

I do think that the cloaking crystals cover menstruation, however. In this AU, the cloaking crystals (at least the ones the Hamatos have) do provide an active transforming effect rather than just a 'disguise.' I don't think it could really work otherwise! It's definitely not a 100% transformative effect, though, and their true biology still plays a major influence on them. (ie they get cold easily! They swim really well and can hold their breath for a long time! They're naturally more athletically inclined than most other kids and a lot hardier! etc. etc. etc.) but I don't think it would leave gaps as big as to let them lay eggs or anything like that, just like it doesn't allow them to shed their skin or to go into full brumation. It's also worth noting that they're turtle mutants, but they're not full turtles. They're half-human, too! So who's to say if Leo would lay eggs even if didn't have the cloaking crystals or the puberty blockers? He does end up having one little baby period right after he goes on blockers, which is not super uncommon, and is very dramatic about it, but April big-sisters him through it and he hasn't had any since. In the fic he is currently in the process of starting testosterone in the near future, which is something that will be discussed/explored in later chapters!

[nakasumi-sims]

Jae-Hwan Park

Some fun facts and an interview with Jae-Hwan:

Traits: Ambitious - Hates Kids - Good

He has a degree in music, but he's never used it for anything. He'd rather play guitar as a hobby and focus on his photography.

He used to be more of a flirt in university, but has mellowed out with time especially now that he's been getting to live life how he wants. He still enjoys going on dates when he has time to.

He's the eldest of 4 and he's 26 years old. There's a decent age gap between him and his half siblings which makes it hard for him to get along with them. His parents don't really stop them from destroying his things, and after years of it, he's grown to dislike children. His opinion could change, but it could be difficult to do so.

He's won 2 awards for his photo series about snowboarding.

He has multiple piercings and would like tattoos, but doesn't know what to get. He would find it fun to go get tattoos with someone.

From Snapstagram Star To Front Covers

Back when Plume was just a concept attempting to get off the ground, we had our scouts scrolling through social media for days looking for the perfect first models to hire for our magazine. We came across Jae-Hwan's profile and we knew he'd be a perfect candidate for us. He really fit the style we go for with many of our issues. We reached out to him immediately, and at first, he thought we were joking!

How did you start modeling?

Before I did here and there gigs with modeling. Some small things for a friend's shop. Snapstagram was the only place I would say I really showed off. The attention was nice when I started the account after high school. It got a bit more chaotic in college, since in my family, modeling and being a "pretty boy" wasn't a viable career choice even if I was getting enough from sponsorships to pay for college. As soon as I got scouted, I left for Sulani. It's unusual to move out before marriage, but I needed the freedom.

Jae tell us about your hobbies

I love hitting the slopes to go snowboarding! It's been one of my favorite activities since high school. There's nothing like the rush of carving up the mountain or pulling off a trick. I don't mind chilling on the beach, but winter will always be my favorite season. I play guitar for fun and I've been teaching Abe how to play in our spare time. Other than that, I enjoy taking pictures for my social media accounts.

Jae how do you feel about your fellow models?

Rowan and Tyler have been great friends to me since we first started our contracts. It's very cool to be living in Sulani for work, though it's been an adjustment from going on my own to living with 3 other models. We were there for about 6 months until they signed Abe. Abe's been great to have around the house since he moved in. Really rounds out the dynamic of the group. Honestly, it's a privilege to be a part of the team.

[miqojak]

B A S I C S

(Much of this - and more - can be found on her carrd!)

Name: J'kesri Denma - Goes by Jak, her tribal name is known to maybe a total of 3 people? And only one of them is allowed use of it in private.

Nicknames: 'The Dragon', Jackal (the name she went by as a thief on the streets of Ul'dah), Ember (former), Empress Ember (former), Little Robin

Age: 27ish, give or take a year - she's not sure exactly. I've been aging her...once each real life year since 2019 (when I said she was 22ish, give or take some), but she's always just had a sort of estimate on her age.

Nameday: She has no idea!

( I do like to think that she's a Scorpio in our real world Western Zodiac - which I don't know how to translate to Eorzean dates - and a Dragon, like me, in the Eastern zodiac.)

Race: Miqo'te, Seeker of the Sun

Gender: Female

Orientation: I'd say she's over all Graysexual, maybe some degree of Demi or Sapiosexual? The perfect storm has to happen for her to want any sort of intimate relationship... even friendship is hard to manage (she very genuinely seeks out intelligent/clever people to have around her), but a true relationship that's 'romantic' or sexual? Well, the perfect combination of events accidentally happened once. But gender has never really entered into it? She just so happens to have attracted and ended up with men in RP! She was/is poly as well, but has agreed to be monosexual with her current partner!

Profession: Restaurant Manager/Owner, Jazz Club Owner/Manager, Tattoo Artist (by appointment, not widely known)

Not publicly known: Criminal (it's a broad umbrella, but her activities outside of the Yakuza are often no less devious than within), Yakuza leadership (Wakagashira/second in command, current acting head of the family while the Oyabun is on indefinite hiatus), Cat burglar! She's very Selena Kyle - her goal is to do more burglary around Ul'dah to screw over the wealthy elite...and maybe actually do some good for people like her, barely scraping by in the gutters, forgotten by society.

P H Y S I C A L A S P E C T S

Hair: Black/Orange - most often slicked back and partially braided, partially tied into a tight ponytail. When relaxed/at home she may opt not to do all the work to tame her hair to look more 'coiffed' as she does in public, and it is about shoulder length, and quite curly!

Eyes: Gold/Green

Skin: Olive/light brown, gold undertones

Tattoos/scars:

-Scars: One small slash at each cheek, one across the bridge of her nose. Levin/lightning scarring in bursts at both shoulders and biceps. A long, ragged scar spanning the length of her back, from the inside of the left side of her neck, to the top of her right buttock.

-Tattoos: Black dragon that winds up the right half of her body. Jackal on her left forearm. 3 Phoenix down feathers on her right wrist. A watercolor robin tattooed just under her left breast, along her ribs.

F A M I L Y

Parents: Deceased, slain by Garlemald in Gyr Abania

Siblings: The only one left alive is her twin brother, J'vynia/Vynnie, @miqo-vynnie, who no longer plays...and she kinda wrote Vynnie out of her life after some things she saw as huge betrayals. She talks shit, but she's been off-kilter ever since he left her life! They had a very Yin/Yang dynamic... where Jak was actually more of the Yang/masculine side of things that's very active... and now missing that more passive and down to earth aspect of Yin? She's been really out of control for a long time. Luckily, the lover she never expected to have has done a good job of grounding her.

Grandparents: Unknown.

In-laws and Other: None.

Pets: She doesn't do pets. As much as I like animals... Jak grew up tribal and sees animals as food, and find the concept of a beast in her home dirty and a waste of resources and time. (And one more thing she could get attached to and lose!) Fun fact: She doesn't like any sort of large bird, and they're one of the few things that actively frighten her! This includes things like Griffons, and Chocobos... those big, yellow birds have murder in their eyes... better to eat them, before they eat you.

S K I L L S

Abilities: Keen eyesight and incredibly sensitive hearing; can play piano by ear; martial arts; prefers (non-lethal) poisoned throwing knives/staying at range; when equipped with her DRK soul crystal, her skillset vastly expands - altering her fighting style entirely, and emboldening her with the knowledge that she can now both inflict - and sustain - more damage in close combat.

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: Diligent/honest - often too honest. She takes even her positive qualities to extremes, and works out too hard, spends too much time trying to excel as a Wakagashira in the Yakuza who is a woman... and she sets extremely high goals for herself and others...which leads into her negative traits.

Most Negative Trait: Judgemental/applies high standards to others. She has a twisted set of standards that makes sense to her, and likely not to many others, most of these rooted in years of trauma - but her high goals were intended to be a good thing. Even for others...she simply pushes both herself, and others (especially if she LIKES you) too hard, more often than not. She believes in constantly bettering oneself, and... she's a creature of extremes. It's hard for her to know when it's too much/she's asking too much...of anyone, to include herself.

L I K E S

Colors: Gold/white, red/black

O T H E R D E T A I L S

Smokes: Moko only, these days, to relax now and then.

Drugs: Former somnus addict - she's worked hard to beat this addiction...and continues to, because addiction is a lifelong curse even once you're clean! But she doesn't like anyone or anything having control over her - and an addiction controls your life more than any other person could! (Plus it's a way that other people COULD control you, in her mind. All the more reason to have dropped the habit.)

Alcohol: She used to be a bit of an alcoholic, on top of a drug addict - she's had a lot of impetus and encouragement to get her shit together...and has! She drinks recreationally/to relax, but takes it easier these days... you're easier to take advantage of, and more likely to say or do things you shouldn't, when drunk...and she likes to be in control!

Been Arrested: Not yet! She's run from the Blades in Ul'dah more than once...but it's not a crime if you don't get caught, right??

Tagged by: @chadhunkler ! Sorry it took me a bit to find the spoons, but thank you for thinking of me! I do love to do little things like this...and should do this for my Male Miqo and my kitsune to better flesh them out, honestly...

Tagging - some people in my notifs, and anyone who hasn't done it/wants to! @uldahstreetrat, @lightyouarelikes (for whoever you want to do it for), @wpip-raham, @xmimiteh, @twelvesblades (if you want to do it!), @briar-ffxiv , @shieldandarrow , @captainqster

(I'm trying to fight the uphill battle against my depressive apathy/malaise... I know deep down I want to be active and meet people and RP and take part in things!! So thanks for tagging me and interacting, folks!)

[doonarose]

Hello internet,

It's 10.30am Monday and I have not checked my work emails since about 9pm Friday. Which is insane, I haven't gone more than 24 hours checking work emails in years and years. What's slightly less insane, but surprising given the not-working, is I've also not really been online.

Saturday was the mad drive down to the city, picking up unexpectedly large karaoke equipment (like, the car was full of speakers and mixers and screens) and then dumping the dog at my parents, making my excuses, dumping my car at my sisters and then taking all the karaoke stuff to the venue in an uber. Then a frantic hour and a half to assemble and get working the karaoke plus laptops hotspotting off phones and playing sportsball highlights. All this for a surprise party my dad was both surprised by and very happy with. Ended up being a great night: I drank the correct excessive amount to loosen up but pay minimal price the next morning, no fights, and I was never actually dragged into doing the karaoke myself.

Yesterday was then a lot more chill but had to go back to the venue and dismantle everything. Mostly just sat around the fire and celebrated his actual birthday, watching more sportsball, and only had a couple of beers. But I also booked myself three nights in a cabin in the forest which I am heading off to in a few hours today!!

Like, actual proper holiday mode activated! This morning I'm back on fic-writing/wrangling duty and hoping that'll take like a duck to water for my little solo romantic writer's mid-week away... we shall see.

I do still need to take all the karaoke stuff back which will take an hour and a half... gonna do that in a minute. And then just chuck everything in my car and take a meandering trip to the cabin. It's only an hour away but I should stop and buy some food and wine on the trip.

Gonna be grand.

Did I mention I've got three whole weeks off work? And I'm NOT going to check emails at all? And also that I sent an absolutely scathing email detailing just how unsustainable and ruined my department is at the moment (uni sector is terrible, blah, blah, but internal surveys recently confirmed that my particular department is about 40% more shit than the university average; also we've lost eight staff in the last four years without any replacement and with increased workload/students... just laid that out and ask how the fuck they were gonna fix it...) pressed send and then logged out. Trying not to think too much about what I might be walking back into.

FOR NOW FIC AND THE WILDERNESS AND WINE AND TREATS AND SLEEP!!!!!!

[chronicallypainful]

One more annoying thing about chronic pain / chronic illness

One of the many challenges of chronic illness is that it (often) robs you of your coping strategies. Within the first few years of developing my chronic pain disorder, I lost the ability to play music, write/journal, knit, play video games, and even browse the internet without severe pain. More than half of my tools for coping with challenging situations and emotions were lost in less than 2 years. It really, really sucked, and I did not have the cognitive and emotional tools at the time to deal with that in even a semi-healthy way. (I was also 16 years old.)

Since then, I have found ways to use assistive technology and other strategies to reclaim some of these activities. I've also explored other avenues for creative expression. And I've added carefully-selected exercise and meditation to my coping toolbox. I now find myself in a similar situation again. Due to current health challenges (which I will write about later), I'm very limited in my ability to drive. Since I live in "car hell" (AKA America outside of the biggest cities), this is really limiting. I'm now finding that I can't (easily) take my dog to the park, go to the gym, or meet up with friends. I'm been through this before (and this time the underlying heath issue will hopefully be temporary). I know I can make it through. But it still really sucks to have coping strategies removed when you most need them.