little-luna-llama

[fastandcarlos]

Family Bubble : ̗̀➛ Fernando Alonso

summary: some soft fernando as you enjoy some rare family time

Your smile couldn’t help but turn up as you watched Fernando walk out into the garden, your daughter held tightly in his arms having just woken up. You pulled a chair over for him to sit down on, peering across to take a look at the slightly sleepy haze that was over her eyes. 

Across the garden the squeal of your son could be heard as he ran around on the swing set Fernando had installed as a surprise for him. Not knowing how he would adapt to becoming big brother, Fernando was keen to find something that would make him smile. 

You were left in your seat overlooking the sunshine, your body still aching from what you had gone through just a few days prior. Fernando didn’t let you lift a finger, running around for every little thing that you needed, keeping both of your children entertained whilst you sat back and recovered. 

“Someone is still a tad sleepy,” Fernando grinned as he took his seat, resting your daughter against his chest. “Do you want anything?” He then asked, watching as your head shook, your hands gripping onto the arms of either side of your chair. 

“I need a drink,” you told him, “but I can go and get it, it’s about time that I got up and stretched my legs for a little while.” 

Fernando quickly leaned across and placed your daughter into your arms before you could begin lifting yourself up off of the chair, standing himself up instead and looking down at you. 

“What would you like?” He questioned, sniggering at your eyes rolling, having come to expect Fernando waiting on you hand and foot. 

You couldn’t help but laugh though at how keen he was to help, “just a water, nothing special.” 

“Anything else? Are you comfy enough? Are you due any pain meds soon?” Fernando quizzed, running through his own checklist in his mind that he’d written of things he could do to help you. 

Your head shook as you shuffled slightly, adjusting how you sat so you were more comfortable holding your daughter. “I’m alright, honestly, stop worrying about me before you kill me off from dehydration.” 

“Sorry, I just know what you’re like sometimes my love.” 

“I’ll tell you if there’s anything, promise.” 

Fernando’s head reluctantly nodded, “I know I’m annoying, but I just want to be sure. You’ve given me the greatest gift again and I just want to make sure I repay you.” 

“Being an amazing dad is repaying me enough,” you assured him, “and that you most definitely are. There’s nothing else I need, aside from a glass of damn water Fernando.” 

“Sorry. Sorry. I promise that I’m on my way to go and get it this time.” 

Fernando walked back into the house to get you a drink as you leant back, your eyes firmly watching over your daughter. Her bright eyes and the laughter from your son in the background were the perfect pair to make your heart swell and your smile wide as you relaxed once again. 

In the blink of an eye, Fernando returned with your glass of water, handing it across to you. Rather than sit back down beside you, his eyes watched over your son, swinging himself as high as he possibly could, squealing each time he got a little too cocky and frightened himself with how high he was. 

“He’s taking to this big brother thing a lot better than I thought he would,” you spoke, following to where Fernando’s eyes were looking. “I thought he’d hate not having our attention all the time, but if anything, he doesn’t seem to want it at all, he’s happy all by himself.” 

“That’s because we’ve done such a good job with him so far,” Fernando proudly told you. “He won’t admit it, but I think he loves having a little sister anyway.” 

When you first told your son that you were pregnant, he didn’t show much emotion. However, as you started to let him help you pick out outfits, come up with names, and join Fernando in decorating her nursery, he soon came around to the idea. 

“We’ve got such a good team,” Fernando smiled, taking his seat down beside you again. “I hope that having these two has been worth all the pain that you’ve endured.” 

“Of course, they’re the best thing to ever happen,” you responded, watching as Fernando’s eyebrow raised back at you. “Aside from meeting you, of course.” 

“You almost offended me there.” 

“I mean without you, none of this would have even been possible,” you reminded him. 

Fernando nodded in agreement with you, resting his hand against your thigh. “I couldn’t have dreamt of a more perfect family. Sitting here doing absolutely nothing somehow feels like the best thing in the world.” 

“Who needs to go racing at over two hundred miles an hour for an adrenaline kick, right?” You couldn’t help but tease, “all you need is two children and a needy wife.” 

“I think you’re justified to be needy for a little while.” 

Nothing would ever be enough for Fernando to show how appreciative for what you had done, bringing not one, but two children into the world. Both times were just as special, leaving him overwhelmed and more in love then he ever thought he could feel, barely able to contain his emotions each time too. 

“How can two little humans consume so much our lives,” Fernando whispered to himself, “they’re so unaware of just how in love we are with the two of them, aren’t we?” 

You hummed in agreement with Fernando, “one day they’ll know just how loved they are, all the sacrifices we’ve made to make sure that they have the most incredible life.” 

“There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for these two, and you, obviously too.” 

As the two of you fell silent, your son called out waving Fernando over to play with him. His eyes quickly checked on the two of you, making sure that you were alright before standing up and heading over to where your son was, still swinging himself sky high. 

“What’s going on bud?” Fernando smiled, watching him slow himself down. 

Your son stopped on the swing, digging his feet into the ground. “Can you push me for a while? I want to go high up into the clouds like an astronaut,” he told him, watching as Fernando’s smile turned up, impressed with his son’s aspirations. 

Fernando was soon back in his bubble of adoration, pushing his son as high as he could. Every so often he still looked in your direction, never quite able to stop himself from worrying. Everything was just so perfect for Fernando and he didn’t ever want to run the risk of his perfect life changing. 

From afar, you watched on, bouncing your daughter gently in your arms as the two boys were lost in their own conversation, talking big about their dreams for the future. 

“Your daddy really is the best,” you whispered down to your daughter, just as Fernando told your son... 

“Isn’t mummy the best in the world?” 

˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

[0omillo0]

Hyunjin x reader

comfort ♡ the reader is exhausted but keeps telling hyunjin that she is fine, untile she faints.

warnings: nothing, hyunjin being a drama queen

for @hannamoon143

You were running on fumes. Lately, it felt like the world was spinning a little too fast, the weight of everything pressing down hard. But you kept it hidden, pasting on a smile and giving Hyunjin a reassuring nod whenever he asked if you were okay. He could be a little too intuitive sometimes, and you didn’t want him to worry about you. After all, he had his own busy schedule, his own pressures.

Tonight, though, you felt especially drained. It was as if the air around you was too thick to breathe, and no matter how hard you tried, the tightness in your chest wouldn’t let up.

Hyunjin appeared in the doorway, tilting his head as he watched you with that curious, concerned look he’d been wearing so often lately. “Are you… sure you’re okay, Y/N?” His voice was soft, but you could hear the edge of worry underneath.

“Of course,” you said quickly, flashing him a smile you hoped looked convincing. “I’m just… tired. It’s been a long day.”

He raised an eyebrow, folding his arms. “You’ve said that every day this week.”

“I know. I just… I’ll be fine,” you said, waving a hand as if to brush it all away. But the wave of dizziness that hit you just then made you grip the edge of the table for balance.

Hyunjin’s eyes narrowed. “Are you sure?” He took a step closer. “Because I know when you’re not telling me something. What’s going on?”

You let out a shaky breath, giving a small, helpless shrug. “I just… I don’t want you to worry.”

His gaze softened, but his tone was firm. “Too late for that, babe. I’m already worried.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but the world around you started to blur, the edges of your vision going dark. Before you could stop it, everything went black.

When you opened your eyes, you found yourself lying on the couch, with Hyunjin’s face hovering above you, wide-eyed with panic.

“Oh my God, you’re awake! Are you okay? Are you breathing? Do I need to call an ambulance?” he exclaimed, his voice high with worry as he waved his hands dramatically.

“Hyunjin…” you murmured, struggling to sit up, but he immediately held you down.

“No, stay down! You fainted! Like, actually fainted!” His voice was a mix of alarm and pure distress. “Do you know how terrifying that was? One second you were standing, and the next, you were just… gone!” He clutched his chest, taking in a deep breath as if he’d barely survived the ordeal.

You managed a weak smile. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Scare me?” He ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head in disbelief. “You think fainting right in front of me doesn’t scare me? You could’ve hit your head! Or… or… worse!” His eyes widened even further. “Do you want some water? Or a blanket? Or an entire medical team?!”

“Hyunjin,” you laughed softly, though you could feel your heart racing a bit from the embarrassment. “I just… I think I just pushed myself a little too hard.”

“A little?” he echoed, sounding incredulous. “Babe, this isn’t just ‘a little too hard.’” His voice softened, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand as he held it tightly. “You should’ve told me.”

“I didn’t want you to worry about me,” you admitted, looking down. “You’re already so busy, and I thought I could handle it.”

He let out a frustrated sigh, lifting your chin so you’d meet his eyes. “Listen, I don’t care how busy I am. If you need me, I’m here. Always.”

You looked away, feeling the emotions rising up, but he cupped your face, pulling your gaze back to him. “Hey,” he said gently. “I mean it. You’re my person, okay? You don’t have to do this alone. I wish you’d tell me what’s going on. Whatever it is, we’ll get through it together.”

You bit your lip, finally letting the tears slip down your cheeks. “I just… I feel like I’m failing, Hyunjin. I’m exhausted all the time, and it feels like I’m always one step behind. No matter how much I do, it’s never enough.”

He listened, his expression softening as he leaned closer, brushing a tear off your cheek with his thumb. “Oh, Y/N… why didn’t you tell me you felt this way?” His voice was a gentle whisper. “You’re not failing. You’re doing so much, and you’re amazing at everything you do. Don’t let yourself forget that.”

You shook your head, a soft laugh escaping despite your tears. “You’re just saying that because you’re my boyfriend.”

He shook his head emphatically. “No, I’m saying that because it’s true! I see you work so hard, and I see how much you care about everything you do. You don’t give yourself enough credit.”

“I just feel like it’s not enough. Like… if I don’t keep pushing myself, I’ll fall behind,” you confessed, voice barely above a whisper.

He pulled you into a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around you as he rested his chin on your head. “Then lean on me. You don’t have to do everything on your own. Just… let me be here for you.”

You stayed like that for a while, Hyunjin holding you as the weight of your worries seemed to melt away. His hand stroked gently down your back, and he hummed a quiet tune, one you recognized from his playlist.

After a moment, he pulled back slightly, a mischievous glint in his eye. “Alright, new plan: tonight, you’re doing absolutely nothing. I’ll take care of everything, and you’re going to relax.”

“But—”

“Nope. No ‘buts.’” He raised a finger to his lips, signaling you to stay quiet. “Doctor’s orders,” he said, puffing out his chest and winking.

You couldn’t help but laugh at his theatrics, even as he threw a dramatic hand to his forehead. “In fact, I’m not sure I can leave you alone. What if you faint again? I’d never recover!”

You rolled your eyes, smiling despite yourself. “Fine. I’ll rest… if it’ll make you feel better.”

He nodded, looking relieved. “Good. But I’m not leaving you alone tonight. You’re stuck with me.” He gave you a playful nudge and then got up, grabbing his phone. “Let’s see… I’m thinking snacks, movies, and maybe an emergency blanket fort. You’ll thank me later.”

With a sigh, you gave in, feeling lighter already. As he bustled around, grabbing pillows and snacks, you watched him, your heart swelling with gratitude. He might be a bit of a drama queen, but he cared for you in ways that made every worry seem smaller.

Hyunjin returned, arms full of snacks, a mischievous smile on his face. “Now, the real question is: cheesy romance movie or hilarious rom-com?”

You laughed, feeling a genuine smile spread across your face. “You pick.”

He settled beside you, putting an arm around your shoulders. “Rom-com it is. And hey, if you start feeling overwhelmed again… you come to me, alright?”

You nodded, leaning into his side as the movie began. “Thank you, Hyunjin. For everything.”

He squeezed your hand, resting his head against yours. “Always, Y/N. I’ll always be here.”

In that moment, you felt lighter than you had in weeks, wrapped in the warmth of Hyunjin’s presence and knowing that, no matter what, he was by your side. And as the night wore on, filled with his laughter and comforting touch, you realized that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to face the world alone.

[joicecubes]

hey guess who’s absolutely losing it over the stan twins again (spoiler alert its me)

so i was innocently scrolling tiktok when i was introduced to this DIABOLICAL au idea: firstly, what if ford really had shot stan with his crossbow when stan first showed up at the shack? and secondly, what if ford tried to bring him back to life frankenstein-style? (full credit to tiktok user @44boora for this idea, go check their account for some gut-wrenching art) (also… full post below the cut this got long)

but like i was thinking about this, ford bringing stan back to life specifically, and how dependent the concept is on this specific time in his life. i just feel like any other time and under any other circumstance, ford would have been able to, eventually, accept stan’s death. we see it at the end of weirdmageddon, where ford is ready to accept that the stan they all know and love is gone now that his memory has been erased. he tells mabel as much, and only realizes there’s hope for him when mabel is determined enough to push back against ford’s logic. ford believes very intensely in his own perception of the world. he believes in science. theoretically, he believes death is death, and there’s nothing he can do to change that.

but then, think of ford after he’s been betrayed by bill. this ford is at his absolute lowest. he can’t trust his own perception of the world anymore. he’s seen the truth of what their relationship was and the horrors he was so close to unleashing on their universe. he is desperate to right his wrongs. he’s losing sleep, his body is abused every time he closes his eyes, and the end of the world as he knows it is iminent if he doesn’t succeed in making the portal as secure and unusable as possible without dismantling it entirely. the only person he believes he can trust after everything that’s happened is stan. so he contacts him for help, and in his time waiting for him to arrive, cannot stop thinking of the worst-case scenario: that bill could still be coming for him. so when he opens the door to stan, his high-strung, paranoid brain doesn’t see stan, and he shoots.

he shoots his own brother with a crossbow and kills him.

ford is not usually one to blatantly ignore a scientific fact. again, death is death, and there’s nothing he can do about that. and yet, in a state of such intense grief, when his entire world is already close to crumbling around him and he’s holding his dead brother in his arms, there’s nothing else he can feasibly do but deny. so he does.

he lives in denial of a lot of things. that stan’s death is final, obviously, but also his reasonings for attempting to do the impossible and revive him. ford likes to believe he operates purely on logic, so he tells himself he’s doing this because he has to. without stan, he can’t prevent bill from entering their universe. he’s still the only person ford can trust, so reviving him is another step in his ultimate goal of stopping bill and saving the world. it doesn’t matter that its never been done before, ford will do it anyway. and he believes that he can, because as much as he thinks he’s moved on from his hubris, he’s still acting off the assumption that he’s special. he’s so far ahead of everybody else, so naturally, if anybody could accomplish the impossible and bring stan back from the dead, its ford.

and so he denies that the real reason he’s trying to save stan is not a logical one. he denies that he’s running entirely on emotions. it would be foolish to try something so risky and impossible and time-consuming if he were only doing it because of his crushing guilt and decade-long yearning, so he tells himself there’s so much more to it than that. he can’t just be doing this because he loves him, right? he’s not that shallow. he’s not that desperate.

and yet, he is. because as much as ford wants to deny it, he can’t live without stan. he can’t live with the knowledge that he was responsible for stan’s death. if he didn’t succeed, his grief would surely kill him.

[maybefae]

Week Ahead: 10/28 - 11/03/2024

Pile 1 - Pile 2 - Pile 3

Although this has a date, I believe it can resonate whenever you come across it!

Remember, this is a general reading and it may not resonate for everyone or completely. Tarot is a tool to help guide but you are responsible for your actions and life, you choose your path.

Pile 1

Tarot Cards: Knight of Wands, Seven of Wands, Nine of Pentacles, Ace of Cups, Queen of Wands (Bottom of the deck), (Two of Pentacles)

Oracle: Understanding, Strength, Celebration, Intuition, Pleasure, Acceptance (bottom of the deck)

While I was shuffling the deck, the two of pentacles was the card left on my desk that I didn’t pick up to shuffle again. And as I got your main cards out, I believe that it was there for a reason. You may have made, what you think, was a risky decision recently. It may have felt not safe to make this decision but you had a gut feeling that this is what you need to decide because it feels right, even if your logical mind thought otherwise. This decision could’ve happened years, months, weeks, days, before this reading. 

And after you made this decision, you spent the time after working extremely hard. 6 months just popped in my head, maybe there was a 6 month gestational period. There is also a feeling of making this decision to spite someone (parents?) that told you that it was wrong. But you are so passionate about this. It probably doesn’t feel like work because you love it so much. I also keep getting “pregnancy.” That won’t be for all of you but I know it is for someone. It could also symbolize the time you have worked on whatever passion you decided to go for.

This week I believe you are seeing the fruits of your labor! You’re seeing all your time and hard work paying off. There is a sense of abundance, this is the type of abundance you’ve always wished for. And these people that have tried to put doubt in your head could see the potential in you and tried to stop you out of jealousy. It may not be that they don’t want you to succeed, but they want the courage you have to go after their dreams and wishes like you have. And seeing it pay off may strike a nerve. You may have gone through a lot of emotional drama before this happens and it’s because the energy is shifting in your favor. 

For some of you, the passion you have lost for something could be reigniting. 

Newts are being shown to me. They usually symbolize adaptability, regeneration, renewal, and transformation. 

This week should be confirmation to you that your intuition works and that you can trust yourself! You know what you want and you have the strength to push yourself through to get it. Your dreams require work, strength, and determination (even if it’s just baby steps). They won’t just land in your lap. However! You probably didn’t feel like you were working at all and so it will feel like it dropped in your lap, which gives you a sense of relieve and gratification. Celebrate your win!

Pile 2

Tarot Cards: (The Tower), Ace of Wands (Seven of Wands), The Hanged Mand (The High Priestess), Seven of Swords (Nine of Swords), The Hierophant (Ace of Pentacles), The Star (Eight of Pentacles), Queen of Swords and Strength (both bottom of the deck)

Oracle: 

While I was shuffling, The Tower card peaked out and it was just the words of it. There could’ve been a situation that you had a feeling was coming or could see happening and it probably just showed itself. I was going to say that this feels very similar to pile 1, but I don’t think that’s the case.

While laying out your cards, I had to get clarifiers. There is a sense of looking at a situation from all sides or finally getting the other side of a story which triggers the happenings of this week. And I was also very set on organizing the cards, even getting the oracle cards out early. 

I want to warn you that the energies are warning you not to make any rash decisions just yet. (Even if you really want to.)

There is a situation that probably just happened. either in a friendship (group), relationship, or family. There is a feeling of something coming out of the woodwork and catching you a little off-guard. It also could’ve been something you have been suspecting all along and you finally got confirmation. Whatever it was, you might have ended up in a fight with this person or these people but you were left with the last word. You had to say your piece and put your foot down. Maybe you didn’t mean to but the emotions were so high that they slipped out and made decisions for you. (Whatever it is, I believe it caused a sense of panic because I’m feeling hot and getting the type of sweat that happens when panic/anxiety happens.)

You may be feeling down or were. There is a sense of betrayal and the feeling of being lied to. (Don’t call yourself stupid for not seeing it.) But I believe that this week could be the time where things are slowly turning around. It’s time to pick up your feet and head to the drawing board. 

I won’t call it a “revenge era” because that means that you are doing it for the other person. You are going to be making plans for your future. You deserve better and you know that the previous situation was getting you nowhere near what you want for your life. It could’ve been a situation where it was safe, but the latest issue was the last straw. The energies that be are giving you a boot in the ass. They are a little tired of you staying where you are, they know you’re tired of this situation, so they are pushing you in the direction you need to go.

You have big hopes and dreams to work towards! And whatever dreams that reoccur in your daily daydreams are meant for you to work towards. So take this week of silence and peace to plan the next few steps moving forward.

Pile 3

Oracle Cards: Transformation (Patience), Passion (Influence), Readiness (bottom of the deck)

Tarot Cards: Five of Pentacles, Soulmates, Nine of Swords, Queen of Swords (reversed), Ace of Cups and The Emperor (Bottom of the Deck)

This was the only pile I was called to pull oracles first. And the energies feel more melancholic and peaceful than the other two piles. Another note: I separated the oracle and tarot, like there is a noticeable presence of separation. And I am all over the place as I write this out because I keep bouncing from thought to thought and having to move sections around. 

I believe that, like everyone that has encountered the altering energies of October, has been forced to slow down. The transformation oracle kept looking at me while I was shuffling. And on this card is a bat. I love bats and they have followed me on my own journey through life. They are a symbol of journeying through darkness, movement even when there is no clear path. You could have been through something this month or recently that has left you in the void. Everything has been stripped away and almost feels like starting over. Here’s the kicker, the energies that be are trying to guide you but you’re too in your head to notice. 

You are in the process of transforming, most likely in every way, but you aren’t giving yourself the patience to let it happen. It’s not going to happen right away. Slow down! Breathe…You are missing out on everything around you. And by missing out on the present, you may be missing the clear path laid out. In video games, players have a path but they don’t usually just keep on the trail. There’s side quests, time where players spend doing the mundane, nothing at all… And I believe that you need time spent just enjoying the day to day. The peace you have been given. Life isn’t peaceful all the time and you want to skip over the chance to have it right now? 

I almost feel like I’m comforting someone that has been crying to any divinity and asking what to do. I see you crying at me… Love, you’re okay. You don’t need to know right now. You have been given the time to just be. Sit and be. The energies that be aren’t your enemy and haven’t left you. They are like the ultimate parent and have been holding your hand the entire time. The times they are silent are the times where you get to think and figure things out yourself. Take this time to feel the emotions, rest…When the time comes to move, you know you can figure it out. You have guided yourself this far and you can guide yourself on the journey ahead. But for now, enjoy the peace.

Decks Used: Ethereal Visions Illuminated Tarot Deck by Matt Hughes, White Numen Tarot: A Sacred Animal Tarot Deck by AlbaBG, Cosma Visions Oracle by James R. Eads, Flowers of the Night Oracle by Cheralyn Darcey

Dividers: @/inklore

[sunonyoreface]

He Knows - Simon "Ghost" Riley Pt. 20

An: Not sure how to start this haha. Hi. It's been over a year but here we are. If you're an old reader, thank you for your patience and for deciding to come back.

Word count: 2410

As the shadow’s grip tightens around my wrist, it feels like a match is struck within me and lit alight with fear. It burns hot within my chest, searing the flesh attached to my bones, causing my entire body to tense. Yet the fear and the pain don’t cause me to shut down. Something has fundamentally changed in me throughout these last strange and inconceivable weeks.

When he leans over me, it’s like the match has lit up his mask, allowing me to see every movement and intention in complete darkness. My fear no longer shuts me down. I feel more awake than ever. More infuriated than ever.

But I’ll be damned if he finds out.  

“Miss me?” his voice is just as vile as it was last time.

I bite my tongue. Speaking now would only give him more reason to do harm.

“Probably not as much as you miss Suds though,” His strong grip yanks me upward into a sitting position. The tightness of his fingers twisting around my wrist painfully pinches my skin. I don’t dare utter a single sound. “Hey? Cause you haven’t been with him all week. Which begs the question: What the hell have you gotten up to, Birdie?”

“Nothing,” I mutter through bared teeth. “When I’m not in Captain Price’s office, the Lieutenant locks me in here.

“So Ghost babysits when Suds is gone. Eh? What’s he like?”

Bennet’s question throws me off guard. What’s he like? Of all the things to talk about, this is what he wants to focus on? Not the trade-off or Price’s supposed secret plans or the Ultranationalists or their impending betrayal. Just Ghost.

There has to be more to his words.

“Quiet,” you can smell the uneasiness on my breath. It carries my words and hangs pungent in the damp air.

“Wanna know something about Ghost?” he asks. My stomach turns. Of course, I do. But he’s counting on that. He wants to know just how interested I am in the Lieutenant. I also know that whatever he’s about to tell me probably isn’t true. He wants to drive a bigger wedge between myself and 141 so my loyalty remains with my father. Except I’ll never be loyal to my father.

I shrug my shoulders in response. I don’t know if he sees or if he cares, but I do know he wants to scare me.

“He tried to kidnap your mother before settling for you,” Bennet’s words taste like the bile rising up the back of my throat. Sour and acidic. Like expired milk. “Do you really think they would stop with you? They’ll never stop. Not until your family – our family is torn to shreds.”

I should have known. I want to feel shocked, but there’s a mental block in my brain stopping me. I. Should. Have. Known.

“Our family?” my voice wavers.

“Yes,” he hisses. “Our family. What? Do you think Ultranationalism is just a movement? It is so much more than that. We are so much more.”

“How come they didn’t get her?” I dare to ask him the question buzzing around in my mind. The hidden bug slips my mind. Our ears are far from the only ones present. Ghost at the very least will be listening. Maybe Soap. Maybe Price. Maybe some higher-up that I’ve never heard of. Nothing in this room is a secret.

Who’s to say it’s true anyway?

Yet, who’s to say it’s not? Sure, the Ultranationalists are liars. So is 141. So is Ghost. Of all the people here, he has kept the most from me.

Truth out here has a different meaning. Every single one of their moral compasses has been skewed by war’s magnetism. Even the men who are objectively fighting for peace and democracy are not on the moral high ground they believe themselves to be. None of their hands are clean. Especially Ghost.

“Our team intercepted last minute. Captured their crew. By the time we discovered their plan to take you too, we were already too late. Little Bird, this was never about you. Your father wants you to know that,” his grip on my wrist releases as he leans back, off the bed.

“Does he forgive me?” my throat tightens as the question barely escapes as a whisper.

“He’s working on it, the shadow’s words are swallowed by the darkness. “But he needs your help. We need to know what angle Price will take,”

“I’m not allowed in the room when they discuss that stuff. They don’t trust me.”

“You must’ve picked up on something,” he urges.

I pause for a moment and think. Of all the different conversations I’ve witnessed, surely something must stand out. Something that is safe to share and won’t hurt 141.

“I mean I don’t think they actually intend on going through with the exchange,” I start. However, this isn’t new to him. Neither side plans on cooperating with the other. It’s a recipe for disaster. “They don’t want my father dead. They need him alive for intel on my uncles. But I also think they might be moving on. Price and Ghost discussed intercepting other families. I think the same way they did with me,” it’s better if he thinks I’m clueless. So much has changed since that conversation. They aren’t moving on any time soon. Not when they’re so close.

“Do you believe them?” his question isn’t inherently strange. It’s the fact that he’s asking my opinion that catches me off guard. Does he genuinely want my input? Does this mean I’ve gained his trust? Not likely.

“I don’t know,” my chest is tight. “Well,” I change my answer. “No, I don’t think so.”

“You shouldn’t,” he starts to slowly pace the room. His mind is racing. There’s so much that needs to be done in so little time. If only I had just an inch of the rope, they’re tying my noose with. Then at least I’d know what tree they planning on hanging me from. “You’re expendable to them,” Bennet turns toward the bed again.  

“And not to you?”

“To me?” his tone quickly turns to something akin to amusement. “No, you’re quite expendable to me. But your father? He sees you as part of our cause.”

“He never brought it up before,” the curious part of me always wins. I have to know. Something. Anything. Even if it's completely fabricated.

“After everything, do you think he’d still lie to you?” the shadow stills and his eyes turn to slits.

“I- no,” we both know it’s a trick question.

“He said your wings will take you far and high, little bird,” for a moment, I almost hear the words in his voice. They sound like something he’d say when I was young. Like stories from lost times.

“But if it was up to you, I’d be dead already,” I shift back to our previous topic.

“Of course,” he says like it is obvious. “But if you stick with 141, they’ll do it for me. You’re useless to them after the exchange. Nothing more than collateral. Even you, are smart enough to know that,” am I though? Hasn’t some hopeful part of me genuinely believed I might actually survive this mess?

“It’s crossed my mind,” my sullen voice lags with a false sense of exhaustion. Yet, I feel more alert than ever.

“Well let it cross again. Into our territory. With your family,” a deep, raspy sigh escapes his chest as he takes a step back from the bed. In the silence of the night, I can hear his scarred lungs rattle like an old pickup on its last leg. But he’s got ‘miles to go and promises to keep’. This shadow isn’t the kind of man to go back on his word. There’s a reason he’s made it to where he is today. “Think about it,” he says as his hand silently wraps around the metal handle.

The door opens and shuts without a sound. When he slips into the darkness, I know this will be the last of our witching-hour meetings. His words haunt me like the last wishes of a lost soul. There’s more truth to them than I’m brave enough to admit.

I almost mistake the soft raps against the door as one of those spirits. Haunted? Maybe. Spirits? Only of the men who’ve died at his hands. Only in the sense that his name brushes across soldiers’ lips like a curse: If you see him, you’re dead.

The knock was just a courtesy. A warning. Ghost enters the room with a large hunting knife in hand. The matt carbon blade is almost impossible to spot in the night. It’s the way his sleeved arm is held at his chest – ready to strike – that gives him away.

Just as one shadow leaves, another appears. Dressed in all black and moving as silent as an unspoken thought. The intensity of his eyes burns as they bore into holes through the darkness.

He knows Bennet is gone. That doesn’t stop him from clearing the room anyway. He reaches under the desk, pulls out the bug, and twists it apart, rendering it dysfunctional. The tiny pieces are slipped into his pocket.

No one can know he’s here.

The words he’s about to speak should never meet the air.

I haven’t had any time to process what just happened and now he’s appeared within moments to remedy an undiagnosed illness.

It feels pre-emptive. Like he knew this was going to come up. Like he’s planned for it.

“Are you okay?” His thick English accent slowly fills the space.

I’m not interested in small talk. I need to know the legitimacy behind the shadow’s words.

“How much did you hear?” I ask. The adrenaline is running low in my veins. I feel the shakes approaching behind me like an unwanted guest at a house party. Creeping and on the verge of cutting into our conversation.

“All of it,” Ghost crosses the room to my bed. He hovers at the edge with his fists clenched at his sides. His trigger finger twitches, expecting confrontation. I stand from my seated position, but he still towers over me.

“Is it true? Did you try to take my mom?” this conversation feels borderline repetitive of everything that went down in the cabin. Every time I think all the details are out in the open and he’s finally being honest with me, I’m proven wrong.

And every time, the Ultranationalists pick at my healing scabs, causing streaks of blood to smear across my fragile skin. It’s an ugly look. One that lacks patience and self-control.

“Affirmative,” the resignation in his voice is concrete. Ghost doesn’t even try to hide it. What else is he leaving out?

“You’re a fucking asshole,” the bitter words fire in his direction. I feel stupid. I feel played. As though they’re all still treating me like a child.

“Y/N,” he quietly warns. His voice refuses to move above a whisper. Who knows what ears are listening outside that door.

“No. Fuck you,” I point at him with a quivering hand. “You’ve had days – no – weeks to tell me this. Why didn’t you say anything, Simon?”

“It was classified,” he automatically responds.

“You’re so full of it,” I cross my arms and fist my hands. I’d be smart to shut my mouth for the rest of my time here. I’d be smart to do a lot of things differently than I have. Yet that’s not an option. “What else are you keeping from me?”

A deep sigh pushes through the black ski mask. One that’s no longer worried, but hinting at frustration. The pause before he speaks is long and filled with words that’ll never see the light of day. “You know I can’t answer that.”

“You can,” I urge.

“I can’t. That’s the nature of my job – of my life, y/n,” I can feel the heat of his chest as he steps closer. “There will always be secrets. The things I know are worth killing over.”

“But if it’s about me, I deserve to know,” I push harder. Surely, he has to understand where I’m coming from.

“Just drop it,” the coldness to his voice is usually reserved for lower-ranking soldiers. I feel it nip at my skin and travel through my bones in an unnerving kind of way. Yet I can’t drop it. Not when it’s my life at stake.

“You can’t come here and expect me to ‘just drop it’ Simon. You came here. I didn’t ask for help,” the annoyance is audible in my voice. “I deserve to know. What is it? Do they really plan on killing me?”

“Of course not,” he scoffs. Ok. So that much is the truth. At least to him.

“What, then?” my brows furrow as my chest impatiently heaves. Why did he bother showing up if all he’s going to do is shut me out?

Simon reaches for a strand of hair, but I duck away from his grasp. The gloved hand falters, before falling back at his side. I know I’ve struck a nerve when his shoulders stiffen and the heel of his boot shifts half an inch back.

“I wanted to make sure you were safe,” the rejection turns his voice stoic. “Goodnight y/n.”

As Ghost turns and heads for the door, he tightly grasps the knife at his side. I consider biting my tongue, but that’s never something I’ve excelled at. “Leaving me in the dark is far from keeping me safe.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Simon looks back as he grasps the handle. There’s a glint so faint it’s almost hard to spot behind his eyes. For a moment he almost doesn’t look real. “You’re safer hidden in the shadows. There’s no going back once you’re exposed to the light.”

He doesn’t wait for my response. I don’t have one to give.

As Ghost leaves the room, I’m left with a sinking feeling in my stomach.

It fades for a while as the hours drag and I drift into a strange type of sleep. Yet, the feeling returns when my door opens in the morning. When I see his face I know today is the day. They can’t afford to wait any longer. The Ultranationalists are ready. 141 is ready.

It isn’t Soap or Ghost or some other foot soldier who’s come to retrieve me: it’s Captain Price.

[autumnmobile12]

My Hero Headcanon: Rei

When I think of Rei’s childhood, I think of Yuki from Wolf Children.

Just not at all being the lady her parents probably wanted her to be and living her best life collecting bugs, feathers, and small animal bones.

And just like Toga, those interests were suppressed because they ‘weren’t appropriate for little girls,’ and she was made to conform.

I mean, look at her expression and tell me she wasn’t told to sit still and be quiet too many times when she was a child.

I think she was a weird kid.

And that's why I play with the snowboarding theme when I do fanworks involving Rei, as well as the idea that Touya’s inability to sit still when he's agitated/excited comes from Rei. It's also why I have the headcanon there was never a point where Rei and Endeavor loved each other. They already have two extremely different personalities in canon, and the high-energy headcanon just highlights a further personality difference.

I’ve already gone into it in more detail with an Endeavor analysis that I made, but here’s an excerpt that illustrates my point:

...what I think shows here is they weren’t really talking all that much. Specifically, he is not ‘talking down to her.’  He is not treating her with any particular disrespect or putting her down as inferior.   He doesn’t have the arrogance he later exhibits. This also isn’t him being aloof and ignoring her either.  Look at his face, specifically his eyes.  That is the same blank, deer in the headlights, “I have one brain cell dinging around in my head that is struggling to find a way to interact with people,” stare he shares with Shouto.

He has no idea what to say to her. 

So finally, Rei turns off to the side to admire the garden, and he asks, “Do you like the flowers?”  It’s a small thing, but it does show that in some capacity, he did show some interest in Rei and making her happy.  He’s just stupidly awkward about it at this point. (Even if his ultimate goal was…well, we’ll get into that.)

...

The long and short of it is if you remove the violence/temper aspect of Endeavor's character, you basically have Shouto: An awkward dork who doesn’t entirely know how to interact with people and he probably doesn’t understand sarcasm or euphemisms either. The main reason we can’t see that side of Endeavor’s character very well is because he’s weaponized intimidation/violence to cover it up. (Dammit, dude, this it not how you patch a character flaw.) So I don’t think Shouto’s isolation and childhood training caused his social ineptitude so much as exacerbated a character trait that was already there. He got it from Dad.

So referring to the earlier pre-kids part of Rei and Endeavor's relationship before the violence actually started, imagine the awkward personality-type paired with a partner who is, by all accounts, weird and has too much energy to be contained. Arranged marriage aside, I like the idea that Rei reverted back to her odd personality after she left her parents’ house. I like to think she danced in the kitchen when there was no one home, hoarded feathers and skulls and other odd keepsakes, and looked for places where she could snowboard. She was a housewife by herself for long periods of time, so who was going to stop her?

There is a short story I absolutely love called Ink, Water, Milk by Catherynne M. Valente. The plot's not relevant to this post, but there is a scene where a bored housewife buys a bunch of those cube-shaped watermelons and just stacks them in her fridge to admire them.

And for some reason, I can picture Rei doing this.

Like Endeavor just comes home to find her sitting cross-legged in front of the open fridge and smiling happily at the nine cubed watermelons stacked neatly inside. (Keep in mind, these things average $100-$200 a piece and are inedible/decorative.) No explanation for why she's done this, she just has a big, ecstatic smile on her face and pointing into the fridge. You know, Touya energy when he's a kid and excited about something. And Endeavor, in true Shouto fashion, is baffled by what she’s done, has no idea why she’s done it, and wondering if there’s a joke he’s not understanding.

I like to mirror this behavior in Touya and Shouto when I can in writing for Ambush Simulation. Underneath the trauma, they are at their core the brother with their mother’s high energy and the brother who is socially awkward and doesn’t quite know how to deal with the unhinged behavior but doing his best.

...

Edit because I just found this gif.

Young Rei:

[ford-pines-lover]

what happened? (drabble)

i wrote this on my phone so if the lowercase is annoying i apologize. lmk and i can change it tomorrow.

stanford pines x reader

tags: angst, age gap

“ford, why aren’t you talking to me anymore?”

you and ford had been close. closer than you and anyone else had ever been. you’ve been inseparable since you got the job at the mystery shack. you started sneaking down to his lab, talking to him, sneaking kisses. there were constant late nights. you guys talked about everything. you had told him how your first kiss had gone. (it was during lunch your freshman year of high school) you had told him how horribly you had lost your virginity. hell, you even told him how you almost failed gym class. he also did bad in gym so it was okay.

there were tears in your eyes as you looked at the man. he was at least 3 times your age, but man did you love him. there was something enticing about him that you couldn’t quite place.

but ford? he couldn’t even look at you. he couldn’t even say what he wanted to say. he was holding himself back. there were words stuck in fords throat that were unable to come out.

“y/n, please. you know this isn’t healthy.” you heard the shakiness in his voice. he wasn’t happy either. clearly.

“what are you talking about? nothing bad is happening?” you step closer to him, yet he sticks his hand out to stop you.

“i’m just a gateway to worse things. you know this isn’t a good relationship.”

“gateway? what the fuck are you trying to say?”

“i’m not a good influence on you.”

“stop being self deprecating. please, stanford. just listen to me.”

he cringed when you said his full name. he wasn’t used to it. especially from you.

“i think you should find a new job, get away from the shack. you deserve better than this.”

tears welled up in your eyes as you watched him open the door to his lab, ushering you out.

“stanford, please-“

“goodbye, y/n. i wish you well.”

[bacchuschucklefuck]

Ooh what's barbarian Figs subclass

m flipfloppin between giant and totem (def reskinned) for her rn! giant would be Really funny for junior year and there's some thematic stuff for the transformation element I think would be interesting, but just purely on a character basis I think fig would love totem esp. as a barbie girl in freshman year. if I land on totem I kinda imagine it like a wuxia animal style thing tbh, mostly just because the idea of someone coming into a fight expecting typical movie shaolin choreography and getting Teenager That Mauls You To Death is entertaining to me

[radicalfembabey]

finally took a very big step I've been dreading for years and completely purged all my makeup, makeup adjacent shit like brushes/lashes/acrylics, and all the unnecessary skincare products i have!! ive only worn it for "special occasions" for years, but there's no occasion special enough for me to buy into beauty standards and model it for the women around me. men aren't expected to consider makeup for special occasions so neither will I!!

[ahsterism]

would you guys kill me if i said i'm starting to think i'm just not built for the multi lifestyle

[mejomonster]

I hate panic attacks

[wutheringmights]

On my quest of watching LOGH, I have finished episode 82 today, and have boo-ed my little hoo out all day. ;_; Thank you again for the recommendation!

You're already in 82??? Christ, it took me forever to watch all of LOGH and here you are powering through

Anyway, sorry that I introduced you to a guy only for that guy to make you suffer. Doesn't just thinking about him make you insane? Don't you want to chew your arm off? Don't you just want to go a little crazy???

[synodic-lupine]

BPD Tenth Doctor

[imflyingfish]

I gotta be less hard on myself. Annoyingly i know that my best work comes from when i am hard on myself. But i keep stopping myself from doing things i want to due to perfectionism. Annoying.

[mifunebooty]

Really funny this white dude in my speech class group i remember he kept making eye contact with me and i was like does he like me um and turns out he did that with everybody white people weird

[shoveitevil]

ok 9 days