#it's so fucking lonely.

[straydogged]

a lot of my high school "friends" are getting married to each other and other people I knew and it's... making me really fucking bitter ngl. like, I'm engaged, I have been for years. it's not that. I guess it's more like bitterness that they're all still friends. I know I didn't make much effort to keep up with them after dropping out, but the truth is I don't think I was ever part of that group the way I thought I was. I remember them planning a party I wasn't invited to in front of me, pretty vividly. I remember that they never seemed to really care about my presence one way or another... I was on the fringes. always on the fringes, tolerated at best. I was too autistic to pick up on that at the time, I think. sure, I had classes with them and we shared a lot of extracurriculars. and a lot of us had gone to the same middle school. thinking back, I think most of them had gone to the same elementary school, too.

I don't know where I'm going with this. I guess I just feel lonely. untethered. when I'm gone, who will remember me? not my classmates. not the people I thought I was friends with. it's like my life before 19 just never happened. there's only one tie left from my childhood.

[funstyle]

as a recovering alcoholic it would take everything i have not to smack someone if they said this to me. i fucking HATE this attitude. this attitude is why people dont want to get sober because you are all so fucking condescending and holier-than-thou about not being alcoholics even though you obviously have no grasp on addiction :) <3

[saragrosie]

Sketching while streaming s5...

Jonathan Sims I will learn to draw you (this is my doing. I could draw him however I want and I choose to stick with an image of him in my brain that is difficult for me to draw. Masochism.)

Not s5 Mahtins below I enjoyed drawing cuz hes neat:

(Edit: I yassified Martin in the do not separate cuz I wanted his hair fluffier)

[inkskinned]

one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.

the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.

like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.

but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.

so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.

i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?

but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?

sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?

and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.

nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.

the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!

and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.

[cozylittleartblog]

valentines newsletter ???? ?? HELLO ???????? ?????? ? ????

[chronicowboy]

we as a collective do Not talk about this line delivery nearly enough and for good fucking reason, i'll kill bradley james for this one line alone. he's just a little boy :'((

[sporkberries]

True Loves Kiss ( when kissing the messiah/the anti-christ please be cautious. though it may draw you out of the lonely it could also lead to severe facial scarring, but hey, you score either way!)

[retributory]

it's impossible to convince people to read scum villain unless you know them like the back of your hand because how do you tell a stranger that the ml holding the mc's corpse hostage and keeping it as lively as possible with qi is actually very heartwarming and tragic within the context of the story. you sound crazy

[tomriddleslove]

Mattheo and the Ranking Kisses Trend

Mattheo Riddle, who picks you up from your closing shift at the little bookstore in hogsmeade, with two cups of hot chocolate.

Mattheo Riddle, who makes you stand there whilst he bundles a scarf around your neck, not wanting you to get ill as you walk back in the snow.

Mattheo Riddle, who listens to you ramble about your day, gazing at you like an absolutely lovestruck fool.

Mattheo Riddle, who can’t say no when you flop down on his bed next to him and ask him to film the trend where you rank the kisses generated by the filter.

Mattheo Riddle, who holds his phone up as this song begins playing in the background. He grins when the first kiss, a forehead kiss, pops up and you shuffle over to press a sweet kiss to his forehead.

Mattheo Riddle, who ranks it second best because it reminds him of all the times he’s fallen asleep next to you, finally feeling safe as you press a gentle kiss to his forehead.

Mattheo Riddle, who’s a little too excited when a neck kiss comes up and you press a slightly too long kiss to the underside of his jaw. (You’re going to pick up from where you finished off the second you stop recording.)

Mattheo Riddle, who can’t help but grin with delight when french kiss is the last one. He’s got lipstick kisses on his cheek, nose, forehead and neck.

Mattheo Riddle, who all but pulls you into his lap. His phone drops onto the bed sheets, still recording. You squeal his name with a giggle as he drags you over, and his laugh echoes throughout the room as he pulls you in for the sweetest kiss.

Mattheo Riddle, who’s bruised-knuckled hands tenderly cup your head as he kisses you. It’s all love and little laughs slipping into the kiss, Mattheo holding onto you like he can’t get enough.

Mattheo Riddle, who’s found his forever person.

[daily-sifloop]

Stargazing? ✨

Day 10: looking for your star

[bixels]

Bit of a weird question, but what is your overall least favorite thing about MLP? 

Sparity.

[xxcrystalinerose]

I like that Charon's new shop theme in Hades 2 has the strings sound so forceful and it has that undercurrent of electronic beat similar to his Hades 1 battle theme. His oar's got a silver blade with moon decor, signifying his alliance to the Unseen, and now the ornaments are on both edges instead of one. The man seems chill but you could definitely see he is BIG MAD right now.

His little brothers, one asleep for literal decades at this point and the other imprisoned with his mother; his sisters taken and banished; his darling professional associate has not returned from the war and he's lonely; to top it all off, Chronos ruined his obol monopoly and the entire dying cycle so he's out of business.

I wouldn't be surprised when Olympus update gets released and we find out there's a new assist character in the third/fourth surface region, it's just Charon shelling the entire mountainside from his flagship.

[spirk-trek]

imagine amanda watching how mothers on vulcan share a telepathic bond with their children and not being able to do this for spock

imagine how it would break her heart, how she might worry they'll never connect when she sees a mother touching her daughter's face or holding her son's hand with purpose, without words

imagine spock melding with her as soon as he's able, showing her he loves her because he can't say it, he'll never be able to say it

imagine her being so proud of her little boy for researching and teaching himself to meld with a non-telepath just for her, all for her

holding him after when he's so exhausted he goes boneless in her arms and she strokes his hair and thanks him

and he mumbles something about it being illogical to thank him before falling asleep and she holds his little hand and feels the tiniest sparks of love still there, so small she might've imagined them before he's snoring softly

[lillotte17]

I have been in the solavellan fandom for...A While. (do not count the years, i beg) and everyone has their tropes and themes re: wolves/halla and hunter/prey and the New Herald being worshiped/the Old God nearly forgotten, and tbh I like bits and pieces of all of them, but like...

For me, the most compelling story is that Lavellan is just Some Guy (gn).

They meet Solas and accept that he is like them. He's an elf. One of The People. You are like me. I am like you. We are The Same People. And because of that, I will protect you with whatever power the humans around us have given me, because I know this is not the safest place for either of us.

And it just fucking... gets him, right? Because that's his whole deal. The world is broken because the people aren't People. He's not like them. They're not like him.

I just love the idea that this impossibly old, incredibly powerful sort-of-god, trips into a hole and nearly throws his entire game away because a regular person (albeit one who was thrust into extraordinary circumstances) decided to be kind. Offered him protection and friendship. Asked him to tell them stories. Grieved with him when he lost one of his oldest friends.

He could not deny that they were a person, because they treated him like a person.

I love how ordinary that is. How simple. How devastating.

'You're real, and it means everyone could be real. It changes everything, but it can't.'

[ineffable-romantics]

RIP to Aziraphale who won't even be able to cope with his divorce by eating cake and clutching an ABBA record to his chest while crying along to Andante, Andante bc he won't have none of that shit in Sky Amazon

[glrlafraid]

why is being a young butch kind of the most isolating feeling ever