#it's so hard to read this book you guys

[mx-lamour]

I noticed a new detail in I, Strahd that has me screaming.

So I'm doing a critical writing essay on the way that P. N. Elrod uses the first-person perspective in I, Strahd to enhance the narrative, with Strahd himself as, you know, the unreliable narrator of his own life (which just... mmm! It's so good).

And I'm just going back through the book to look for the page number where he says, "That's what I told myself, anyway."

But, I then found this instead:

You would spill my blood, armsman?

HOLD. THE F**K. ON.

armsman???

So I rifle back through the pages, because that is not what he said. That's not the quote. It's Commander. It's "You would spill my blood, Commander?"

And I find it. And I'm right.

OOGH.

Oh, does it hurt.

Strahd is removing himself from Alek in this moment. He's taking him down already in his mind. Trying to make Alek less important, so that it's less of a blow to himself when he kills him, just a moment later.

Commander is a title, and one of respect. It shows that Alek occupies an important position. And even that, I realize now, was a point of distance, because the two of them often do call each other by their given names. When Strahd was in danger of assassination, Alek yelled "Strahd!" multiple times, which is very personal. When they were out on tour, dealing with the local burgomasters, Alek got perhaps a little too excited and Strahd chided him by just quietly saying his name, "Alek."

When he called Alek "Commander", Strahd was hanging over the edge of a cliff to grab his hand, almost ready to die himself if Alek fell. Alek was in danger of death. In that moment, Strahd chose to focus on the fact that he might lose a leader in his ranks, rather than a close personal friend. It was a little bit of distance, so that he could focus on the task in front of him. To keep his head in that unexpected crisis.

When Strahd calls him "armsman", though... Alek is now faceless. He has been stripped of name. He has been stripped of rank. He has been stripped of all personal attachment. Because that is what Strahd needed to do in order to complete the task ahead of him.

Alek has also just stabbed him in the chest, when Strahd inaccurately recalls that moment, and they are both in shock. Given a chance, Alek would never have done this. "Only a drop or two," he had answered, dangling from the cliff, "if it spares the rest, my lord." (Alek follows his lead in this act of distancing. "Didn't have to, my lord," he murmurs this time.) It can't be Alek, so this is just another soldier. This is just another fight. It's just another war.

So, Strahd thinks of him as "armsman" here, to avoid a truly devastating layer of grief.

Neither of us had a choice. That's what I told myself anyway.

The quote I was looking for is on page 137. One page before all that.

[ihavesomejays]

troublemaker

to thank @keebssi for all the delicious raturine, have a quick modern au wangxian. nothing like wondering why your school's bad boy is asking you for your student id number in the middle of a random park (he is not in fact asking you for your student id number) !! also apologies to the mdzs fans i haven't read mdzs and i don't really plan to this one was just for a homie

closeups under keep reading

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

Man why did my latest obsession have to be a 40 year old fantasy book series

[writeouswriter]

*banging fists on table* more mentally ill characters in stories that aren't just about them being mentally ill! More mentally ill characters in sci-fi, in fantasy, in romance and fun and high stakes situations and everything in between, as the heroes, as complex individuals, multifaceted and treated with respect, not having their needs and differences ignored or skirted around but, again, not having them be their only trait or plot point/entire premise! Please, I'm begging, on my hands and knees, there's a place for these topics and characters in realistic, reflective and literary fiction, yeah, but there's also a place in those magical, mystical, action packed, mysterious and alien worlds, give them to ME

[bijoumikhawal]

hello! i hope it's alright to ask you this but i was wondering if you have any recommendations for books to read or media in general about the history of judaism and jewish communities in egypt, particularly in ottoman and modern egypt?

have a nice day!

it's fine to ask me this! Unfortunately I have to preface this with a disclaimer that a lot of books on Egyptian Jewish history have a Zionist bias. There are antizionist Egyptian Jews, and at the very least ones who have enough national pride that AFAIK they do not publicly hold Zionist beliefs, like those who spoke in the documentary the Jews of Egypt (avaliable on YouTube for free with English subtitles). Others have an anti Egyptian bias- there is a geopolitical tension with Egypt from Antiquity that unfortunately some Jewish people have carried through history even when it was completely irrelevant, so in trying to research interactions between "ancient" Egyptian Jews and Native Egyptians (from the Ptolemaic era into the proto-Coptic and fully Coptic eras) I've unfortunately come across stuff that for me, as an Egyptian, reads like anti miscegenationist ideology, and it is difficult to tell whether this is a view of history being pushed on the past or not. The phrase "Erev Rav" (meaning mixed multitude), which in part refers to Egyptians who left Egypt with Moses and converted to Judaism, is even used as an insult by some.

Since I mentioned that documentary, I'll start by going over more modern sources. Mapping Jewish San Francisco has a playlist of videos of interviews with Egyptian Jews, including both Karaites and Rabbinic Jews iirc (I reblogged some of these awhile ago in my "actually Egyptian tag" tag). This book, the Dispersion of Egyptian Jewry, is avaliable for free online, it promises to be a more indepth look at Egyptian Jews in the lead up to modern explusion. I have only read a few sections of it, so I cannot give a full judgment on it. There's this video I watched about preserving Karaite historical sites in Egypt that I remember being interesting. "On the Mediterranian and the Nile edited by Harvey E. Goldman and Matthis Lehmann" is a collection of memiors iirc, as is "the Man in the Sharkskin Suit" (which I've started but not completed), both moreso from a Rabbinic perspective. Karaites also have a few websites discussing themselves in their terms, such as this one.

For the pre-modern but post-Islamic era, the Cairo Geniza is a great resource but in my opinion as a hobby researcher, hard to navigate. It is a large cache of documents from a Cairo synagogue mostly from around the Fatimid era. A significant portion of it is digitized and they occasionally crowd source translation help on their Twitter, and a lot of books and papers use it as a primary source. "The Jews in Medieval Egypt, edited by: Miriam Frenkel" is one in my to read pile. "Benjamin H. Hary - Multiglossia in Judeio-Arabic. With an Edition, Translation, and Grammatical Study of the Cairene Purim Scroll" is a paper I've read discussing the Jewish record of the events commemorated by the Cairo Purim, I got it off either Anna's Archive or libgen. "Mamluks of Jewish Origin in the Mamluk Sultanate by Koby Yosef" is a paper in my to read pile. "Jewish pietism of the Sufi type A particular trend of mysticisme in Medieval Egypt by Mireille Loubet" and "Paul B Fenton- Judaism and Sufism" both discuss the medieval Egyptian Jewish pietist movement.

For "ancient" Egyptian Jews, I find the first chapter of "The Story of the Jews: Finding the Words 1000 BC-1492 AD” by Simon Schama, which covers Elephantine, very interesting (it also flies in the face of claims that Jews did not marry Native Egyptians, though it is from centuries before the era researchers often cover). If you'd like to read don't click this link to a Google doc, that would be VERY naughty. There's very little on the Therapeutae, but for the paper theorizing they may have been influenced by Buddhism (possibly making them an example of Judeo-Buddhist syncretism) look here (their Wikipedia page also has some sources that could be interesting but are not specifically about them). "Taylor, Joan E. - Jewish women philosophers of first-century Alexandria: Philo’s Therapeutae reconsidered" is also a to read.

I haven't found much on the temple of Onias/Tell el Yahudia/Leontopolis in depth, but I have the paper "Meron M. Piotrkowski - Priests in Exile: The History of the Temple of Onias and Its Community in the Hellenistic Period" in my to be read pile (which I got off Anna's Archive). I also have some supplemental info from a lecture I attended that I'm willing to privately share.

I also have a document compiling links about the Exodus of Jews from Egypt in the modern era, but I'm cautious about sharing it now because I made it in high school and I've realized it needs better fact checking, because it had some misinfo in it from Zionist publications (specifically about the names of Nazis who fled to Egypt- that did happen, but a bunch of names I saw reported had no evidence of that being the case, and one name was the name of a murdered resistance fighter???)

[moregraceful]

my hot take as a person with an english degree and a library degree is that some of the dorkiest fiction and poetry ever committed to paper in the english language came out of the iowa writer's workshop so it is at best goofy and at worst completely futile to argue that your average amazon unlimited writer is having a more deleterious effect on literacy and literature.

[lala-blahblah]

I will never make this because it would be for an audience of one (me) but ever since reading "If we Were Villains" (story about serious drama kids in college who perform shakespeare and deal with a murder) I have been entertaining the thought of a crack fic crossover with High School Musical The Musical The Series where the staff decides they will no longer put on shakespeare after the tragic accident that happened at Thanksgiving, because Shakespeare plays would only increase the tension and drama. So they hire Ms. Jen who decides their spring play will actually be High School Musical (which exists in the 90s in this universe) and it ruins the vibe so much that everyone gives up on being dark and mysterious because they're universally pissed at Ms Jen for making them learn choreoraphed basketball dancing.

[bakuzen-xiv]

(mild Dawntrail spoiler warning for Area 6 watch out gamers)

I just found this NPC in Dawntrail that had massive Moren vibes (the library guy at the Crystarium) and I'd like to imagine that's his shard right there. Just because I think it'd be neat.

Also just look at them augh

[anqaspond]

fucking finally a book about racism that isnt centered around america

[themyscirah]

Some portrait doodles I did during my flight today

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

one of my favourite past times is researching my special interests as if I don't already know all the information I'm seeing. I love googling and reading things like yep knew that yep knew that yep knew that like of course you know that you idiot you only googled this yesterday there isn't going to be anything new 😭

[sylvies-kablooie]

unrelated to my usual loki blogging or history posting but i finished reading dune yesterday and watched the first part of the film trilogy and i'm so torn

because on one hand, i loved the worldbuilding, i thought the plot and themes were interesting if convoluted and often unpleasant, but i cannot stop myself from thinking about the themes and wanting to know where the story goes next even though i'm scared to learn (and i often didn't enjoy certain plot choices, like the 3 year timeskip or what felt like to me was chani being entirely sidelined)

on the other hand, i read the plots of some of the other novels, of which there is over 20, and frankly i think they sound unenjoyable and also there are so many of them- i know that guy turns into a worm- and how on earth could i ever read them all, what if they stop being good, but by that point i'm too invested in canon as has been known to happen- gestures to still keeping up with the mcu for sylvie alone- do i just. trudge along? through the 20 books?

my current course of action: gonna watch part 2 and maybe read dune messiah to understand part 3 when it rolls around but other than that. i shall try and resist any temptation to be called into the void. (can they cover all of dune messiah in one movie? will it be like 4 hours? so many variables)

and also i'm gonna be hard on the jessica and leto ship. peace n love.

[rayssion]

Regulus, holding his phone with a really red face: w-what....

Regulus: slowly puts his phone down, decides to go wash his face.

Regulus: opens the bathroom door to find a butt naked James staring at him equally shoked.

Regulus, slowly closes the door, the line he read on his phone earlier repeated itself in his head: "... he looked back when a very naked Will got between his legs on the bed, his cock fully erect. Nico stared, it was a nice cock dusty pink and large..."

Regulus: I- I understand now...

[iwoulddieforienzo]

Something that makes reading TOA so devastating is how fucking much Apollo feels about Everything. There’s so MUCH. Like I don’t even know how to describe it to you if you haven’t read the books yourself. He has so many complicated thoughts and emotions about just about everything and he cares about everything so much and there is just SO MUCH going on in his head. And yet none of it ever reaches his mouth!!

He almost never says what he’s feeling. What little comes out of his mouth about his thoughts barely even scratches the surface of what he actually means. Like he’ll be having a long ass monologue about how incredible someone is, showing a deep understanding of them as a person and empathizing with them so hard you’d almost think it’s projection but it’s not he’s legitimately just mind melding with this random person he met like a week ago and he’s thinking the softest, kindest thoughts about them like he knows they’re fucking incredible - and what comes out of his mouth is just like, “you’re a wonderful friend :)” AND ITS LIKE. THERES SO MUCH MORE UNDER THE SURFACE. the sheer admiration and adoration he has for everyone around him……… UGHHH!!! But he never VOICES ANY OF IT!!!!!! He never tells anyone about what Zeus did to him……. He never tells anyone except the reader about his realization that Zeus is abusive…. He never even tells commodus about how much he adored him, not then and not now… he refuses to tell anyone when he’s in pain or tries to justify the things he does when he actually had Decent Reasons for why he did something… I’m. I’M. AUGH. AHHHHH

HE DOESN’T EVEN TELL US ALL OF HIS THOUGHTS IS THE THING. THERES EVEN MORE THAT HE IS NOT TELLING US!!!!! THE FUCKING OCEAN OF FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS HE HAS ABOUT EVERYTHING IS THE CLIFF NOTES VERSION. I AM IN DISTRESS.

And YET…. Even what slips out of his mouth is so fucking devastating it is SO devastating. He’s so fucking kind and gentle with Harley and Meg and and other younger Demis and his kids… he’ll act like an obstinate idiot and then turn around say something that drags the core of the person he’s talking to into the light like nail on the fucking HEAD like he reached into their soul and gave them the words to express something that they were struggling to say aloud or that they didn’t even realize about themself. Around the 2nd book he starts putting voice to some of his feelings and thoughts about others and even that tiny fucking sliver is overwhelming to the people he’s talking to bc he’s SO. AUGHHHH

[brinnanza]

it's like good and fine and great that people are reading my gomens fic along with the airing of the second season of the show BUT ALSO get religion quick was written FOR THE BOOK and was written BEFORE the show even came out stop tellin me about neilmans modern au in the comments sorry he left it on a cliffhanger but I'm doing my own thing over here crowley rezzed that dove so help me god

[voidify333]

thinking about war & peace again… pierre bezukhov really is the original poor little meow meow