pamcham

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

hi! i saw your post about how true the makers of atsv were to real-life brooklyn and i loved it so much that i just had to ask if you'd be willing to make a more in-depth analysis on that? i'm not from america but i adore the movie so it's very interesting to hear firsthand accounts about its authenticity from locals! ofc this is just a humble request and i completely understand if the answer is no <3

I'd LOVE to! The Spiderverse Series is honestly the most accurate movie of New York I've seen in my life - including live-action movies. I say that not just in essence but in everything. And Across the Universe takes it over the top. Like, INSANELY so.

Across The Spiderverse & It's Dedication to Cultural Accuracy [aka ATSV is so goddamn good I can tell you exactly what street Gwen and Miles went to Mumbattan from. It's that accurate.]

I'm a black, afro-latino, and a born and raised 'Brooklynite'. Despite there being thousands of movies of New York, I'd say less than 5 percent of them are in any way accurate or current. (Yellow taxi cabs are no longer a thing here really.)

But Across the Spiderverse defies that in every way - nailing it historically, culturally, and even by replicating exact locations.

Wanna see the Bodega Spot robbed? Cause it's a real, random bodega! And the building he goes into at the end - I can tell you exactly where it is, with 100% assurity. All by street signs.

In the first scene with Spot we see him standing outside on the curb, looking into the store. On the corner there is a street sign that reads Fulton St.

Fulton is an actual street in BedStuy (Bedford Stuyvesant, pronounced Bed-St-eye), literally a stone's throw from my house. And they take it further.

Although it can be hard to see, the other side to the left of it reads Nostrand Ave. Fulton and Nostrand is a very popular intersection in the neighborhood, mainly because there's a subway station for the A line located on one corner.

There's Nostrand and Fulton.

But if you turn to the other corner you see...A Bodega! Looks familar?

That's the bodega Spot robbed.

99% of the people who watch this movie will be from New York. Even less will be from BedStuy. Even less will catch the split second sign on the corner, only on screen for only a few frames.

It took me 3 watches to notice. But I noticed. And my jaw dropped. How much that means is unexplainable. I've been on that corner, and the TacoBell across the street. And so has Miles. That's insane.

It doesn't stop there.

Spot enters the store, as we pass we see a sticker for 'WIC/EBT' on the cashier's counter. I'm not sure how common this is - but WIC and EBT standards for Welfare Benefits and Food Stamps. As you cannot buy warm food with Food Stamps (sadly), lots of bodegas advertise taking EBT for the deli sandwiches.

Nice shout out to the struggling families in the communities, I love a Bodega that takes EBT.

We move towards the back of the store - In the Bodega while Spot messes with the ATM we get a wider shot, and another very insanely specific shout out.

Behind Spot is a sign showing a Beef Patty (which I'll mention in a moment) and a sun logo called 'Sunny Patty'.

This is a direct call out to a specific chain of Beef Patty shops in Brooklyn and Harlem called 'Golden Krust'.

I cannot stress how much of a niche reference this is! Golden Krusts only exist in low income neighborhoods - mainly in Brooklyn, Harlem, and the Bronx. If you're anywhere near Times Square or any place else New York shows choose to portray - you're not finding a Golden Krust.

Golden Krusts are store that is ingrained in Caribbean culture, which Brooklyn is full of - hence the adapted Jamaican flag up front. I grew up eating Golden Krust and I'd eat it more if they didn't close so goddamn early.

But it's there.

Once again, only a few pixels, only a few frames, but someone probably took 6 hours drawing that. For the 0.009% of the people who'll get the reference. Low-income, black New Yorkers - like me.

ATSV is so accurate that you can even find the exact spot in which Miles and Gwen leave through the portal.

But before I tell you where it is - I wanna talk about why it's so important.

It's important because one of the most famous Spider-man scenes in history is just plain WRONG to New Yorkers.

This scene is ENTIRELY incorrect, and I knew it even as a child.

Firstly, based on the skyscrapers everywhere, this is solidly Manhattan. The train says Bay Ridge, which is in South Brooklyn, maybe 40 minutes away by train. So I'm going to assume this is the Q or B train, running through Manhattan. Which, okay they do, but -

There are NO elevated trains in Manhattan. The Q, like every other train, only goes above ground in Brooklyn and Queens. This is very clearly Chicago.

So he couldn't be doing this. It's a simple but HUGE fuck up. Any one born in New York will notice it because Manhattan just looks wrong with elevated trains.

And it would've been fine if they just set it in Brooklyn where Bay Ridge and the elevated trains actually are.

But instead they made generic Manhattan streets - so much so I can't even tell what neighborhood they're in. Do you see how this is such a problem?

Across The Spiderverse is animated. And they still put in the effort.

I can't tell you where Peter Parker is stopping that train - it ain't Manhattan - but I CAN tell you where Miles and Gwen leave for Mumbattan.

So let's go back to where we started. We're on Fulton and Nostrand both in BedStuy.

Throughout the fight, we see Spot and Miles go through a couple streets - most notably a very popular street in the neighborhood - Broadway.

This happens twice, once while fighting Spot, and once when Miles and Gwen grab the hot dogs. They show this twice, cause this will be important for what we're trying to do.

Now this may not make any sense to you, since it's just random streets, but I'm about to tie it together.

Gwen releases the bug near an elevated train. When we see Miles and Gwen swinging, they cling to a train. Now, it's hard to tell what train this is but so far we know.

We're in Brooklyn

We're near Broadway

We're near an elevated train line

There's a station on Broadway called Broadway Junction. It serves the G line and the J,M,Z line.

When we see the train pass by, we get a glimpse of the model. Each train line has a slightly different variation, with some being a lot old. The one that passes is one of the newer ones.

(Once again, very accurate, as those models do run on elevated lines)

And although we can't see the letter on the train, by that alone, I can guess we're by the elevated J,M,Z lines in BedStuy - near Broadway Junction. Easy. Now we just need to know what stop we're at.

Well, they tell us that too. Finally, When Spot heads into the building we get a glimpse of the exact street he's on - Bedford.Ave

So I just threw a LOT of information at you - but look at this map of the J,M,Z line and hopefully it comes together

At the bottom along the green line - we see Bedford/Nostrand Ave. Remember, the robbery starts us off on Nostrand. Let's move up the green line. We get to a part where the green line passes the brown and orange ones - the JMZ trains.

They connect at Broadway (Officially Broadway Junction Station). We see Broadway with the hot dog vendor there.

If we move to left of Broadway we see Marcy Av. - and if we look to the left OF THAT we see a faint white line heading north.

THAT line is Bedford Ave. Where Spot enters the building.

Because we know they're in Brooklyn, and we know they passed Broadway. Plus we know they're now on Bedford by an elevated train that runs newer models.

So from those signs alone we can definitely say that Spot is on Bedford Ave. and Broadway. Next to the JMZ elevated trains, two stops from Broadway Junction in Brooklyn.

100% that's the spot (lol). That's the only place Bedford crosses an elevated train. And as a New Yorker, I got that from this photo.

Trust me when I say - we can tell.

By those short shots of street signs, we know that Miles started in BedStuy, swung north towards Broadway, then took a turn towards Bedford Ave in Williamsburg. And that's where Gwen plants the bug - and the place she returns to before going to Mumbattan.

Is that crazy? That's CRAZY. Percision accuracy that I have never seen in a movie live-action or otherwise.

All throughout the first scenes of ATSV - they are on actual streets, that are reasonably within swinging distance of each other, along actual train lines - with their stations accurately located.

That's INSANE. There was no need for that amount of detail, but they did it anyway.

There's SO many times in Spider-men movies where they'll start swinging in Queens, and then the next scene is like Upper Manhattan. They don't label the neighborhoods, but from buildings alone, I can tell what neighborhood it is.

And I'm supposed to believe Peter just swung 2 and a half boroughs in twenty minutes. I don't notice. But I NOTICE.

Here, Miles and Gwen are truly swinging accurate distances in the right amount of time. That's mental. And refreshing!

In a live action movie - they have NO excuse. Just film in the city, it's not like we're Gotham. And we give film crews huge tax breaks. In an animated movie - completely understandable. But they still said 'No, that's subpar.' and went the extra mile.

They didn't even have to show ANY street signs, they could've left it at the easter egg at the corner store.

But they didn't. Because they're telling a story about a Black kid from Brooklyn, who leaves for someplace completely unfamiliar. BedStuy is Miles' home, and they wanted to make it feel that way. So when he's not there - in the cold polish of Neuva York - you can feel it.

You can feel Miles leaving his warm, rich community when he lacks that community in the Society. In the movie and IRL, BedStuy is so full of color, with so many people doing so many things and sharing so many cultures.

And in the society, everyone is the same. There's no culture. That's dedication.

Because of a train in Spider-man 2, I was immediately taken out of the story. And because of train in ATSV, I was immediately brought in.

For once, it feels like they're swinging around a neighborhood - cause they are.

A Large Detail in ATSV:

So I talked about Trinity Church - the real church that Peter Parker was buried at in ITSV - and how accurate the team got it to the actual building.

In fact, this is the spot where Miles is standing.

Like he's standing maybe 20 feet AT most from this spot, you can see in the windows and spires at the top.

But I also wanna explain why this - and why the fact that Peter was buried there is SO important.

Trinty Church is one of the most famous historical churches in the United States. It was started by the first English settlers in New York. It's extremely famous, and extremely sentimental.

For reference - Alexander Hamilton and his family are also buried at Trinity Church, along with dozens of other important US historical figures - across centuries.

You can't just be buried in Trinity. It's a city landmark. The cemetery is full, small, and you CANNOT pay your way in. The church is extremely choosy with who they will bury there - and honestly, I don't think anyone has been buried there for maybe a century or more.

So for the city to bury Peter Parker's body in the most prominent church in all of the city, if not the country - that speaks VOLUMES.

Like I said in the last post, my father use to work at Trinity Church - and they're the whole deal. Candles burning everywhere, super quiet and devote. The church has catacombs under it, everything.

They didn't just bury him anywhere. The people of New York went out of their way to give Peter Parker the most honorable burial physically possible within the city of New York.

The highest honor for any New Yorker. One reserved only for Spider-man.

Which I think was an amazing touch. Especially since Trinity is in downtown Manhattan - so anyone could come visit and pay respects.

Other Cultural Accuracies

Before we wrap up I wanna breeze through some other cultural accuracies that appear in ATSV.

Miles stops to eat a Jamaican Beef Patty while in the Bodgea. I spoke about these earlier with the Golden Krust sign. Jamaican beef patties are these flaky pastries colored with tumeric, full of spicy meat. And they are very popular with the large Carribean community in Brooklyn - which I'm apart of :)

In the case, we see the Beef Patties labeled with red dots. But Miles seems to go for the only one without it.

I'm guessing the red dots indicate which ones are the spicy Beef Patties and which ones are the mild, and Miles grabbed the last mild one they had.

They draw it really well, especially while Miles is eating it.

"Spider-man seems more Dominican." Genuine question - did anyone laugh at this joke in your theatre?

Because all three times I went, people laughed. The first time people LOVED that joke.

NYC, especially the Bronx has a HUGE Puerto Rican AND Dominican population - many times living side by side

And there's this kinda 'beef' in the same way Yankees fans have beef with the Mets fans (NYC baseball teams)

The best way I can describe the joke is that they're two very strong, very proud Spanish cultures that are often mistaken for each other - but Puerto Ricans and Dominicans can very obviously tell each other apart. Mainly because of the Spanish they speak.

So for him and his mom to have that back and forth, it's kinda an inside joke of Puerto Ricans and Dominicans getting confused for each other - but them being able to tell the difference.

His mom says Spider-man is Puerto Rican, but Miles corrects her - without backing it up with any reason.

It's like they can just TELL.

I don't know how else to explain the joke but its a very New Yorker thing to do - discuss that out like that.

Since a lot of us are the children of immigrants - it's knee-jerk to identify with your parent country and not this one.

If you ask someone in New York 'What are you'. Many young people (me included) would say "Oh I'm *parents nationality*." In my case, I say I'm Bajan and Peruvian. Even though I was born in New York.

Miles would say he's Puerto Rican though he's never been.

So them discussing where Spider-man is 'from' even though he's obviously a New Yorker is the joke.

Like - someone on the writing team HAD to be from New York to add that in cause it's so...oddly New Yorker???

While swinging Miles and Gwen pass the B46 bus. Once again, completely accurate. The scene starts on Nostrand and Fulton. The B46 does indeed stop on Fulton St.

When they're swinging, the movie accurately shows the new World Trade Center (aka The Freedom Tower) - which is the tallest building in the picture.

Also, the bridge to the LEFT is the Brooklyn Bridge, while the tall one on the right is Manhattan Bridge. Many people don't know there's actually two bridges. (There's more but those two are the main ones)

Good on them for showing both Bridges, both accurately placed as well

Fun fact: Trains run over the Manhattan Bridge - the Q, B and a couple others (beautiful - I love it when they do) but trains do not run over the Brooklyn Bridge.

And lastly, when Miles and Spot are on Broadway, the school behind them is actually architecturally accurate for a Brooklyn school. So much so that design is iconic.

______________________ So those are most if not all of the cultural accuracies in Across the Spiderverse!

I cannot stress enough how ridiculously bang on this movie is in terms of everything.

The team put in so much work, and it paid off. To me, at least.

I don't feel like Miles is some kid from a different alternative New York. I feel like he's a real kid in MY New York. From everything down to his Jordans (don't even get me started on how much Jordan's has a CHOKEHOLD on teenagers in New York. Like...it's a status thing. Even since I was a kid, everyone wanted Jordans. Jordans or Nike Air Force 1s. So having Miles wear Jordans is my favorite thing cause yea a kid from BedStuy would think those are flyest shit ever even though they're just regular degular Jordans lol. And you KNOW Miles 42 a sneakerhead. Look at those shoes. He aint creasing those)

This movie, is chef's kiss. It tops all other New York portrays - live-action or otherwise and I stand on that.

If you read this far, thank you SO much. I love sharing New York culture (and the cultures that make it what it is to begin with) and I'm SO happy I can share this stuff and hopefully help people appreciate the movie more too!

If you learned something or have any questions, I'm all ears!

And I usually leave a photo of Hobie here as a send-off but this post hit the photo limit LMAOOOOOO

Bye.

[monsoon-of-art]

SO! Awhile ago I sent an ask about how I shoved your OCs into a Café AU and with the latest few post you've been putting up, the AU has expanded.

Dragonfly is the tired barista inherited the Dragonfly Café and its trade secrets from her now retired abroad father, they talk through facetime. She also goes to college where she dorms with Michelle, Fabi and Taylor. She also over charges or short changes rude customers.

Clay is the café cleaner who fills in as a barista when Dragonfly has classes. Dragonfly let's him live in the flat above the café for free since she's already paid for her dorm room and never leaves the café premise other than to take the trash out.

Hayday is the annoying customer who always seems to order complex drinks at inconvenient times, tries making small talk with Dragonfly when she's clearly busy and never tips, the only reason why he's not banned is because Dragonfly can't really afford to ban anyone. He's several part time jobs and sometimes moonlights as a coffee boy for Ant Queen, the local sleazy motels owner, and eventualy Snake Eyes. He totally didn't develop a crush on Dragonfly after she gave him a free cup of coffee and slice of carrot cake after seeing him nearly collapse at the counter on a slow day. He dropped out of college to take care of his mum when she fell ill, is in both medical and educational debt.

Snake Eyes is a sleazy businessman whose been trying to buy the café out ever since Dragonflys father first built it and is now trying to either buy out the property from Dragonfly fairly or bankrupt it until she's forced to sell. He wants to demolish the building and the surrounding area to build something like a mall or apartment complex.

Nighthawk runs a crêpe stand outside of the café and tries to, unsuccessfully, poach customers. He swore revenge on the Dragonfly Café since he blame it for the cause of his parents diner going out of business.

Damselfly is the part time barista that Dragonfly hired to help Clay while she's in class after finding out that he was struggling. She hardly helps Clay in favour of being on her phone and is actually wealthy influencer online but doesn't tell anyone offline so they give her praise for being a 'struggling student working hard to pay off her loans'. She regularly post pictures of Dragonflys and Clays fancy coffee art designs and claims them as her own and keeps tips she receives instead of putting them in the shared tip jar.

Lovebug is the repeat customer who brings a new girl he catfished to the café atleast twice a month. He eventually develops a crush on Dragonfly because she comped his bill after a particular bad date which he believed meant she was into him, he also gets annoyed that she isn't dating him despite never asking her out and rarely talking to her outside of ordering drinks.

The Ice Cream Man is exactly the same as in canon, eldritch 'Wife' and all, no one knows what his deal is but he comes around on the 13th of every month no matter the weather, there could be a Magnitude 10 earthquake, a Category 9 tornado and a literal biblical downpour going on at the same time and he'll still be happily walking down the street with his 'Wife'. Everyone stays out of his way, once Nighthawk begrudgingly spent a day hiding in the Dragonfly Café just because he forgot what the date was when he set up his crêpe stand.

Drosera is the florist who owns the flower shop on the opposite side of the street to the café. She doesn't eat people since she isn't a plant but she'll do anything to ensure her shop stays afloat and is welling to go to some serious extremes in a calm methodical manner to do so.

Detective Victor is a small time detective whose spends his down time trying to slowly untangle the mystery of why businesses in the area around the Dragonfly Café keeps failing. He regularly comes to the café on his lunch breaks and is a good tipper.

Reporter Louise is a small time reporter for the local news agency who once had a bad experience in the café and took it personally. She takes every opportunity to rag on the small café and the only reason why she doesn't get reprimanded for it is because the her personal vendetta with the café is the most amusing thing her news agency has published in years.

Hope you enjoyed and keep uploading more work, you're giving me some serious brainrot with your OCs and I love it!

op I dont have much to add here but I love this a lot

[epicocat]

I realized i haven’t been giving any GunplUpdates to the, like, 3 people that care, so I’ll just do a quick review of the nine kits I’ve built since the Zeong

Real Grade Sazabi

Probably one of the best RG kits I’ve built so far, at least in recent memory. It’s big, it’s articulate, it’s detailed, I love it!

High Grade Gundam NT-1, AKA Gundam Alex

This one was certainly an older kit. It builds the same as any other HG RX clone, and absolutely needs panel lining with all the molded details (good thing I picked up a pen recently). However, despite all its limitations, the HG Gundam Alex turned out better than I expected, and poses quite nicely!

I’m not at all biased because we have the same name :P

High Grade Mobile Doll May (Gundam Base Color)

This is probably my first official step into the Mecha Masume genre of model kits, but not my first girlpla (I’ve built the Figure Rise Sulleta Mercury the Artery Gear Fusion Guard Spider Feidy kit [highly recommend] before either of them). I doubt I‘ll end up buying anything more scandalous than this, I really don’t care for the half naked robot girls of Frame Arm Girls or Megami Device.

That all being said, this was a really fun kit! It was my first run with waterslide decals, and I think they turned out… mostly ok. The articulation is really good, the sculpting is well detailed (especially in the areas meant for other fans) and I just like kits that come with stands.

I will say, i do not and will not understand the appeal of battle stilettos (it’s hard to see in the pic but her feet are basically pointed straight down in the heels she’s wearing)

Sakura’s Edge

Another of my few non Bandai kits, Sakura comes from the Armored Puppet line of kits from Number 57. It’s another 1/24th scale kit, which means she is very very smol. Her most stand out feature is her third giant buster-arm, capable of wielding a sword twice her height. The bright pink, gold, and white go really well together, and she just looks really nice! Unfortunately her armor is more of an afterthought from the creators, as some parts need to be filed and trimmed excessively to get them to fit (I was in a VC with a friend, he can testify I was almost brought down by the shoes), and other parts just sit loose, ready to pop right off after the slightest tap, touch, or pinch.

30 Minute Missions Spinatia (Commando Type)

This kit was my intro to 30MM and I wish I bought more of them sooner! It was a cheap impulse purchase from a “local” hobby store I was checking out and it was a really enjoyable experience! It was simple and relatively fast (I failed the mission, it took me an hour), but using all the extra parts and mixing and matching equipment was so fun to play around with and experiment with what looks cool, something I hope to see more of as I build more Hexa Gear kits. In the meantime though, I have a 30 Minute Custom to plan >:3c

Transparent SD Gundam and Char’s Zaku II

I dont own many SD kits, and I think these are some more I’ll snag more of as I shop around. They’re simple and cute! They’re both Cross Silhouettes, but only the Zaku came with the CS frame, so the Gundam is just really squat and even more chibi in comparison. Overall not much to write home about, but still fun!

High Grade Gundam Maxter

The only red white and blue I’ll ever stand for

That being said, this was a really great kit! It’s a shame it’s P-Bandai limited, along with Gundam Rose. It absolutely needs panel lining for its literal abs of steel and face, but it still looks quite nice. It’s very articulate and it was hard to pick just one photo that truly sums up the insanity of Gundam Maxter, perfectly captured in gunpla form. It comes with everything seen in the picture, along with its flying surfboard shield, guns, and an effect part for its bursting machinegun punch. It is such a great kit, and comes with enough ham to justify its $30 price tag, despite the fact that Maxter is in fact very small.

High Grade Messer F-01

I love The messer’s design. It feels like a true successor to the Zaku series of suits. I know canonically it’s built off of the Sazabi, but it’s design is 100% Zaku. It’s got that respirator like mouthpiece, and the spiky asymmetric shoulder armor. Is just so cool! And did I mention this things size yet? It, like it’s predecessor are big boys, snd both stand almost as tall as many master grade gunpla in my collection. Overall an amazing kit!

[haliaiii]

VAL AND SAM INTERACTIONS....LORE....... HEADCANONS.......SKETCHES.......ANYTHING!!!! i need more content of them both or i will literally Explode

I don't really have any new sketches atm but have some random facts or something

Both Sam and Val can't cook great, at best Val can make a decent egg on toast

They literally eat nearly all their meals at the restaurant owned by Kain's mom (Ms. Wanchai)

Their main source of income is bounty hunting

Why? Because being a bounty hunter gets you a bounty license which can be used as a form of ID without needing to be registered in the government archives (loopholes lol)

This is great for Sam, who's not supposed to be in this era and is keeping it a secret, and Val, who's technically legally dead

This way they can continue to make a living, and continue leasing the apartment

Bounty hunting itself is a dying profession unfortunately because the risks and the government slowly trying to push it out

tbh in the Retrograde world, if you either work for the government, become a bounty hunter, or join the terrorist group

You lose your bounty licence if you don't complete a bounty at least twice a month

anyway enough bounty stuff back to Sam and Val

Bounty hunting gets them like around 800 USD (there's a different in world currency tho)

Harder bounties can go up to 2k or more

But it's not like a lot so they're kinda just scrounging by

On off days Sam usually goes to the arcade or a bar at night

Val spends most of the time inside, but he'll also take his hoverbike for a spin

Speaking of which, Val got his hoverbike in a street race against this rich guy during his early bounty hunter days

That's why it's so fancy

If Val sold it, he'd probably have enough money to buy a fancy place in the city

but he's way too attached to it, plus it's their only form of transportation

Otherwise they'd have to take public transport and walk

They have clothes they wear for bounty hunting and clothes they wear for normal days

They both actually have two of the same jacket each

They do all their laundry at the laundromat where Kain works

Normally, they do all their shopping locally but because it's a small town, sometimes they have to go to Jupiter because it's the closest city

Speaking of which, the name of the town they live in is "Level 4"

It's where Val woke up after "dying" and he hasn't really been bothered to leave since

Because of the halo on his head, Sam gets recognized pretty easily when he goes out in town

Sam's halo turns off when he sleeps, but he also recently found out if he covers the metal implant on his back, they it goes away somehow (however it makes him really sleepy when he does that)

Val used to smoke a lot but he doesn't anymore, he only does it if he gets really stressed about something or he has a nervous breakdown

There's a lunar eclipse that happens every year since the cataclysm, Sam is always super excited to see it since he's a big fan of astronomy events

Val has always felt incredibly sick on those days, ever since he was a child, he usually closes all the blinds and locks himself in the bedroom,

It feels like his blood is trying to claw its way out of his veins

It goes away the next day so it's probably nothing

Sam once developed a strong addiction to a specific cherry smoothie at a dinner and had it every single day for an entire week, he spent the next week in bed from a terrible stomach ache

And finally as a fun Christmas special

For Christmas, Val and Sam usually spend it with Kain and his family plus their friends,

they don't have a christmas tree cause those species of pine trees kinda died out overtime and are pretty hard to find nowadays, and they don't have enough money for a fake one they'll use once, so they just opt to decorate a random houseplant

Anyway sorry this is pretty long 💀 ngl you can bring as many hcs as you want, they could probably have a chance to make it to the canon-

[deezbutz28]

kaleidoscope

a/n: hi hi!!! i'm backk. this is loosely based off of my own personal situationship BUT i'm writing on how i wished it turned out LOLOL.

this is part two to sweet venom!! (plz go check it out if you haven't yet!!)

wc: 1.9k

tags: angst, fluff, mad situationship

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

you are so so so grateful that the dreadful school activity you and taehyun shared is finally over. your friends could see how relieved you were, often saying, "was it really that bad? you guys barely saw each other."

yes it was that bad. during that time while trying to avoid him, you often wished that he would go up and talk to you. trying to start over or at least apologize for ghosting you. but that didn't happen, and you are finally ready to just let him go.

but of course, the world never works that way. about a month later, you and your friends were at your school formal. you had worn a dress that was a bit out of your comfort zone, but your friends were there to hype you up.

to no one's surprise taehyun and his group of friends were there as well. you kept your distance as much as possible, but every so often you look for him in the crowd. almost every single time you looked, he was already looking at you. makes letting go 10x harder, great...

but you don't dare go up to him, if he wants to talk he will have to go up to you himself. does he go up to you? nope. so after and hour or two at the dance you decide to finally head home.

you shower and get ready for bed, but you find yourself spacing out. wondering what was going on inside taehyun's head.

a few days after posting about formal, a notification pops on your screen. its a dm... from taehyun...

you ponder on whether you should open it or not. unsure on what he might send or say, or more importantly if he would be different from now on.

you open it the day after he sends it. the post he sent was a meme of a squirrel in the forest with the caption being, "how life feels when you..." (a/n idk what to put for it but just imagine it being something stupid XD)

you scoff reading his message, because the boy literally ghosted you. even when you were talking he would refuse to even glance your way.

so you take the easy route on approaching the situation.

y/n: ??????

kangtaehyun: so, i might have made a mistake...

y/n: did you send this to the wrong person? because i think you did.

you were upset and now you aren't going to hold back from expressing your anger.

kangtaehyun: ouch.

kangtaehyun: please, can we talk in person? i want to clear things up.

y/n: fine. i'm free tomorrow.

so you and taehyun will finally acknowledge each other in person. it only took like five months but you know better late then never, right?

you and taehyun decide to meet up at the local coffee shop. you decided on wearing some baggy jeans and a nice sweater. not wanting to seem like you are trying to hard (even tho you are).

you arrive after him, and you spot him at one of the comfy booths. he looks nervous. like bouncing his leg and running his hand through his hair and semi pale type of nervous. but, he looks good. taehyun is dressed in jeans, a white t-shirt, and a brown jacket. it is crazy how his outfit seems to somewhat match with yours.

after gawking at him through the window, you decide to walk in. as the bell rings, taehyun immediately looks up and walks towards you.

"hey! thank you for meeting with me," taehyun's voice wavers a bit as he talks to you. definitely proving that he is indeed very nervous. "what do you want to drink? i'll buy!"

you greet him back and tell him your order. you make your way to where his stuff was. as he stands in line, you try to prepare yourself for the conversation ahead. constantly chanting in your head that you won't be a pushover.

he makes his way to the table with your drink, and sits in the chair in front of you. immediately you thank him, and laugh shyly about how awkward this will be.

taehyun coughs a little, and decides to speak up.

"i'm sure you're wondering why i asked you to come here. but, i'm just going to say it... i fucked up big time, and i'm sorry for being such a dick." taehyun says rubbing the back of his neck.

you start to say something when he interupts. "please let me finish. i've been thinking on what to say to you since i snapped at you at the school activity. please, i really am sorry. i had just been a tad jealous when i saw you talking to beomgyu. so, i just snapped and i was out of place. and when i saw you at the dance having fun, i realized that i can't leave things the way i left them. i understand if you are still upset with me and don't want to patch things up i completely get it. i just wanted you to know how i've felt."

you collected your thoughts for a moment before speaking. "wow... um you know that when you ghosted me i was really really hurt. i so badly wanted to talk to you in person, but i figured since you did ghost me, you wanted all ties cut. since then i've grown up a bit. i realized that people just drift apart and i thought that was happening to us. i enjoyed texting you all the time in the summer, i considered you one of my closest friends... when you ignored me in person, i was so confused, why--" your voice began to crack as you tried to finish your sentence.

taehyun immediately tries reaching for your hand, but retracts it. realizing that he should respect your boundaries.

he starts, "i'm sorry i made you feel that way. it's just that... you make me so nervous. you are a person that everyone looks up to and i just was scared that i'd embarrass myself in front of you. so, that's why i would talk to you online constantly, because i could be bold." taehyun glances at your hands again and slowly inches his hands closer to yours. seeing if you would accept his gesture. after a moment of looking at you in your eyes you hold his hand slightly.

"y/n i am so sorry for ignoring you in person. i had just been so scared that you would think i'm weird or that by talking to me in person, you would want end our friendship." he gives your hand a slight squeeze.

as you start speaking, you start playing with the ring on taehyun's hand. fiddling with things while you were nervous was a common thing for you. "you know i'm not a rude person right? i wouldn't have ended our-" you gulp, "friendship over something stupid like that right? the reason why i kept talking to you is because i like how goofy and weird you are. i understand completely about being nervous. i was always so scared to approach you in person because you might think i'm socially awkward." you end your sentence with a slight giggle.

taehyun also giggles a little and his cheeks start to redden as he looks down at your fingers playing with his ring. "i know that one asshole said you were socially awkward, but that doesn't mean you are. in fact, i don't see where he got that at all."

you sigh a bit, "thanks taehyun. if you don't mind me asking, why did you reach out to me a few days ago?"

taehyun's knees began jittering nervously. "when i saw you at the dance, i realized that i needed to make things right and apologize."

you squeeze taehyun's hands, "i accept your apology, but please please please don't ever do that to me again." you say while smiling.

taehyun smiles ear to ear, and asks, "so we're good again?"

you nod your head as taehyun stands up.

"what are you doing?" you question the boys antics.

"in the summer, you said you've always wanted to go ice skating... do you want to go?"

"hmmm... yes!"

taehyun holds your hand as you walk out of the coffee shop. you and taehyun decide to walk to the rink since it is only a five minute walk. on your way to the rink you miss the way that taehyun stares at you admiring the downtown area.

his hands fit perfectly with yours. and once you guys arrive at the rink you both get confused as a couple. the man at the counter greets you two, and says "you guys came at a perfect time! couples skate just started a few minutes ago!"

taehyun asks if you're still comfortable with skating, and you nod your head in approval.

as you get your skates, taehyun takes your skates in hand and offers to put them on for you. "oh tae, you don't have to do that!" you whisper shyly.

he starts removing your shoes and says, "it's the least i could do, and besides i don't mind!" he looks up at you with red cheeks and a shy smile.

it turn out you and taehyun are horrible skaters. you guys could only move on the ice if you were grasping onto each other for dear life. that only lasted about thirty minutes on the ice before you both decided that you might end up with broken bones if you continue any longer.

you walk out of the rink hand in hand. as you realize that it is starting to get darker outside. taehyun stops a few feet in front of your car, and you only look up at him in confusion. "what's up tae?" you question the brown haired boy.

"y/n, i get it if you don't like what i'm about to say... but, i like you. in the romantic way. i have since the first night i started talking to you, i am so upset that i handled our friendship poorly. but, like you, i have grown up a bit and i've realized that i should've treated you differently. and if you don't feel the same way i totally get it, but i just needed to tell you. and i promise i won't fuck it up this time."

you comprehend what he said till you decide to speak up.

"you know tae, when we first started talking i really enjoyed talking to you as a friend... but as we talked more often, i realized that i was developing a crush on you. and when we stopped talking, i was so upset that i had let myself fall for you that easily. but, honestly those feelings never left... so, i also like you. in the romantic way of course." you end your sentence by giving taehyun's hand a squeeze.

"really? thank goodness you scared me at first. i thought i fucked up again. i was so worried--" you interupt taehyun with a quick kiss on the cheek.

"you're cute when you ramble... i'll see you at school tomorrow, okay? don't be a stangerrrr!" you say as you open your car door.

taehyun stands there in shock, while waving at you as you are reversing out of the parking spot.

oh you are so excited for what's to come.

a/n: so basically none of that happened to me in real life lol. but if you made this far plz plz reblog and heart this story. and let me know if i should write something else. xoxo

thank u to @taehyunsluvr and @lenasvoid for commenting on sweet venom and giving me inspo to finish this lol

[aventurasdeunatortuga]

Fenghuang

The past 3ish days have been spent in the city of Fenghuang 凤凰, literally, Phoenix Town, in Hunan province.

This town was established sometime in the 1700s and was generally a sleepy river town until recent years. The famous Chinese author Shen Congwen is from here and he wrote a famous novel called Border Towns set in this town in the 1920s about a Romeo and Juliet -esque romance. Shen Congwen is now considered to be one of the greatest Chinese modern authors, but during his life he was targeted by the Communist government because his novels were too “apolitical”. He was socially ostracized to the point where he attempted suicide. He later was “reeducated” and became a scholar of traditional culture working at a museum, he was nominated for the Nobel Prize for his novels in 1988 but died before the result was announced.

This town is famous nowadays for its architecture and for being the setting of this novel. It is an extremely popular tourist destination in Hunan province but relatively unknown within the rest of China and abroad. I only found out about it from a TikTok comparing it to the town in the Japanese animated film, Spirited Away, and thought it was pretty.

The old town here remains pretty much exactly as it did during the 1700s, which is pretty rare. It is built pretty much right up against the Tuojiang River with houses partially built on stilts overlooking the river. Its also known for the local indigenous Miao (also known abroad as Hmong) and Tujia culture. Nowadays it is a very touristy town. Each night the entire ancient town is lit with an enormous amount of lights and the river itself becomes the stage for a 3.5 hour continuous reenactment of Shen Congwen’s novel, complete with actors on floating stages reenacting key parts of the novel and light shows depicted on the walls, on the cliffs, and in the sky. The main characters of the novel, Cuicui (a 13 year old girl) and her grandfather run the local ferry in the book, so tourists can pay to ride around on a replica of this ferry to visit the various scenes being reenacted throughout the river. I did that on Thursday night and it was pretty cool even though I didn’t understand what was going on. I later found an English version of the novel online and read it and now it makes more sense.

Its also very popular here to rent traditional Miao/Hmong and Tujia clothing for the day and hire a professional photographer to go around and take photos with you. It is very picturesque here so it makes sense, I was just not prepared for the sheer quantity of people doing this. It was very hard to not end up in people’s photos.

Its also interesting that it is so trendy to dress up and do photoshoots wearing traditional ethnic clothing when only a few decades ago it was considered very shameful to be a part of the Miao/Hmong ethnic group. They were often referred to by offensive names such as ‘rude’ or ‘dirty’ people. Shen Congwen himself was part Miao but hid that fact until near his death. There are hundreds of ethnic groups in China, while the Han group is the largest and most culturally dominant, and even now ethnic minorities such as the Uyghurs in Xinjiang (western China) are persecuted and forced into ‘reeducation’ camps, but that is kind of a taboo topic in China. Its just interesting that both Shen Congwen and indigenous cultures are so celebrated here when historically they have been treated so poorly, and I wonder how much of it is genuine admiration and how much of it is just for the “fun” of it. I mean it is nice that culture is being celebrated but I wonder how authentic and genuine it all is, It all seems a bit Disney-fied to be honest.

Anyway, this town is beautiful but very hot and extremely touristy. I think I am the only foreigner I’ve seen the entire time I’ve been here, so its always a big production every time I try to buy something or go in a shop. Everyone has been really nice but I just feel bad inconveniencing people with my broken Chinese when everywhere is so crowded and busy.

I went around a few times really early in the morning and again while it was raining out and there was almost no one out so it was really nice to walk around then. Although it is truly beautiful here; most of the time I’ve been here I’ve been in my hotel room because between the tiny streets, the overwhelmingly enormous crowds, and the nearly 100 degree heat and humidity its all been a bit too much for me.

I’m leaving tomorrow and it will be my most complicated transportation feat yet because I have to take public transport to the train station, go to a different city, and from there get to the airport and fly across the country, all before 11am. Wish me luck. I’ll be in Lijiang, in the mountains near the Himalayas in southwest China. I’ll be there for a fairly long stint, nearly 2 weeks, and hopefully it won’t be as hot there.

Until next time,

[idgafabyou]

I shop my clothes locally, but since I'm broke asf I have a few pieces from mango and asos

[princesssmars]

valentines with the arcane women 💕

Violet

def stresses about what to get you

of course, she remembers the holiday from when she was younger, she and her friends giving small candies and cards to each other

i feel like she is a very sentimental person, so she would try to take you somewhere special to her/the both of you

but that was so long ago, and she's pretty sure a box of candy hearts isn't gonna cut it

ill prob expand on this in a full vi fic

but being put in prison and going through everything she went through, she was very guarded

but then she met you and you helped break down some of those walls, and you adored her, and for that she adores you

maybe the location of your first date or where you first met

your honor i love her

probably laid out a little blanket and picnic for you guys including your favorite foods and snacks <3

if she hasnt already this is where she says i love you

Caitlyn

somehow knows both exactly what to do and has no clue what to do

she knows from looking at her parents and seeing other couples around the city what people do for each other on valentines: gifts, dates just standard displays of affection

so instead of doing some grand display of affection shed do something more lowkey

but i think because of her dediaction to her job she hasnt had many (if any) romantic relationships

and because shes awkward as all hell

same girl

i think she would do something simple and at home, like a little homemade candlelit dinner

she would also get you a custom made necklace or anklet with her initials 😭

the two of you talk and laugh for hours

throw in a lil slowdance in her bedroom to soft music with the moonlight shining down on you <3

shes an angel <3

Jinx

lil crazy ass girl

but we love her !!!

while im pretty sure she also hasnt had many romantic experiences

but shes clearly very intelligent and artistic, so she does her own little take on the holidays tradition

only the best for her trinket <3

gets you chocolates shaped like nuts and bolts and other science crap lol

then buys steals candy and snacks from a local store

probably takes you with her as a date

you guys get a sugar high and dance and giggle all night long 😭

she kinda freaks me out wont lie

maybe even makes a special bomb and when it goes off it the smoke and fireworks say your name with little hearts around it <3

then for an extra gift she gives you a custom gun she handmade for you <33

but shes a cutie

Mel

a literal goddess

i want her to step on me yooo who said that

so she definitely uses her wealth and influence to pamper you

and on valentines its maybe even increased

you wake up expecting her to be at work, thinking you will just spend the evening together

but when you open your eyes shes behind you cuddling you, having taken the day off to fully adore you 🥺

tha day starts with the two of you making breakfast together, something you didnt expect since her helpers normally prepare food for you

but she said she wanted to do something together instead <3

after showering and getting dressed, you head out to the city to shop and stroll for the morning and some of the afternoon

then she takes you to one of the fanciest (and hard to get into) restaurants in piltover

she made sure you both bought appropriate attire during your shopping spree so you both look ✨glamorous✨

you eat the most delicious meal you've ever eaten with the love of your life and you couldnt be happier <333

okayyy i finally finished this! a few people saw that i posted this unfinished on accident when i went to save it to my drafts 💀but i had a lot of fun writing this and ill def be writing more arcane stuff mostly about vi and mel <3 tell me if you guys have any things youd like to see in particular ! 💕💕

[jeongvision]

nct’s jaehyun’s perfume collection review!!

for part two, please refer to here!

hello, all! so some of you may have already known that in the past month, i have impulsively purchased various of perfumes, some of which are based on jaehyun’s personal perfume collection that he uses as mentioned on various platforms. some of the scents he uses are:

tom ford white suede

tom ford fucking fabulous

le labo neroli 36

jo malone myrrh & tonka

jo malone wood sage & sea salt

byredo bal d’afrique

as someone who loves collecting perfumes myself, this was a perfect excuse for me to buy some to get an idea on how he would ‘smell’ like!

some of you have asked for me to post a review of his perfumes! i will be primarily listing my reactions, experiences, and ratings for each scent, along with pictures of jaehyun associated with each scent and if the scent is masculine, feminine, or neutral. i have purchased all of them except for tom ford fucking fabulous. the byredo bal d’afrique will be reviewed at a later date after it arrives in the mail, so for now only 4/6 scents will be discussed.

disclaimer: this is NOT an advertisement but simply a fun and personal review of his perfume collection! but i wouldn’t be opposed with possible brand deals with any of them

before you buy!! some of the fragrances will react differently on your skin as the scents are based on your body chemistry with certain chemicals listed on their ingredients. thus, you may smell a different scent when sprayed on your body than on mine. not only that, some of the perfumes utilizes synthetic ingredients, which can be a deterrent for those with a sensitive nose. i strongly recommend sampling them out at local stores before purchasing as these brands are expensive.

without further ado, happy reading! please do tell me your personal experiences if you have also tried some of them (or perfumes from other members!) <3

warnings: heavy cursing, some vulgar language lmao (they will be listed as [**] if you would like to skip those parts, especially for minors)

TOM FORD WHITE SUEDE

“The addictive pull of leather and suede is channeled through an elegant musk-derived composition. Musk’s primal intensity is harmonized with saffron and thyme, heightened with velvety rose and warm amber. Warm, supple and sensual, a perfume with an irresistible expression of raw desire.” —Tom Ford

first and foremost, i just want to say holy fucking SHIT HE SMELLS SO FUCKING GOOD WTF ASKJFKLSJ

[**] HE SMELLS SO FUCKING SEXYAJJF IT’S HARD HOURS FOR HIM EVERY TIME I SMELL IT

like?? oh my god?????

i literally CRIED in my car after smelling it bc oh my gOD HE SMELLS LIKE THAT??!?!??

HE SMELLS LIKE A FUCKING BOYFRIEND OH MY GODJSJFJKS

i can never look at him the same way ever again holy crap

“raw desire” sOMEBODY PLEASE SAVE ME I CAN’T—

[**] like honestly it makes me want to eat his neck and choke on his dick whAt

anyways

it has a leathery and musky scent to it with a mix of powdery!!

slightly sharp when you first spray it but once it settles and marinates on your skin and clothing, it’s PERFECT

listen i’m still shooked that he smells like THAT

my friend told me one day to spray it on a big sweater and wear it to mimic wearing one of ‘his’ sweaters and—

:(

i wanted to kith him

and hug him

and cuddle with him

and never let him go aaAAAHHH

[**] oh daddy

masculine or feminine? androgynous

recommend? YES ARE YOU KIDDING ME

rating? “i’m going to name my future kid eleven because he is going to be better than you.” —liu yangyang to ten

LE LABO NEROLI 36

“Neroli is another name for the essence of Orange Blossom. The unique quality of our Neroli is its sunny floral character with an extraordinarily warm, sensual base. Rose, musk, mandarin orange (slightly aldehydic), jasmine and vanilla, among other essences, complete the portrait, bringing Neroli 36 spikiness, ease, zest and heat... Well-being, elegance and charm all in a bottle!” —Le Labo

okay so i purchased this (and many other scents) as a sample (1.5 ml) bc this shit is hella expensive

like bro the price of it as 15 ml costs more than jo malone’s 30 ml

maybe it’s bc they said lab techs compound it on-demand??

not sure

but anyways

this gives me straight flower boy vibes

like i’m in a flower shop and there’s a cute florist behind the counter trimming and tending plants with such careful hands

but the white floral kinds

OHOHOHOHO

WE LOVE IT

if you like those kinds of scents, then this is definitely the scent for you!

seriously it smells like lilies and all the white florals alike

personally i like the sweet floral scents so this one is okay to me

still smells really good!

reminds me of glade’s fresh linen carpet powder so it unlocked a repressed memory of my childhood LMFOAODA

what a gentleman he smells like uwuuu

honestly if i was getting married to someone and he showed up to my wedding as a guest wearing this perfume i’d leave my fiancé on the spot

this man has quality tastes wtf

masculine or feminine? gender neutral (ish)? more feminine if i have to say

recommend? if you like white floral scents then you would go BONKERS over this!

rating? 7/10 only bc i prefer sweet floral over white floral scents but if i didn’t then i’d rate it 10/10

JO MALONE MYRRH & TONKA

“Rich, hand-harvested sap of the Namibian myrrh tree, mingling with the warm almond and lush vanilla notes of the tonka bean. Noble and intoxicating.” —Jo Malone

oh bitch

BITCH

THIS MOTHERFUCKER SMELLS SO FUCKING GOOD OH MY FUCKING GODDDDDDD

“noble and intoxicating” DAMN FUCKING RIGHT IT IS

[**] I WILL GET ON MY KNEES FOR THIS MAN IF I EVER SMELL THIS ON HIM

my royal liege, jung jaehyun, i am at your SERVICE HELLO SIR WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU TODAY

he could step on my face and i’d thank him for allowing me to breathe the same air as him oh my god—

ahem

moving along now

it has a vanilla and amber scent to it! a very nice and sweet scent to it that’s not too overbearing

usually i’m not a big fan of vanilla or cake fragrances bc they tend to nauseate me

but this one?

ohohoho

this is the good stuff

i didn’t exactly purchase this one; i bought other fragrances from jo malone and they gave me free samples to choose from, and myrrh & tonka was one of them sO MIGHT AS WELL TRY IT OUT

so glad i did omg i don’t regret it

i might just buy a bottle of it

[**] another one bites the dust just RAIL ME ALREADY JUNG JAEHYUN I’M BEGGING YOU—

[**] daddy pls

masculine or feminine? androgynous, but leaning slightly towards feminine

recommend? YES OH MY GOD

rating? CHITTAPHON OUT OF TEN

JO MALONE WOOD SAGE & SEA SALT

“Escape the everyday along the windswept shore. Waves breaking white, the air fresh with sea salt and spray. The mineral scent of rugged cliffs, mingling with earthy sage.” —Jo Malone

yo this shit smells good

like REALLY good

he smells like beaches and lemons hELLO THERE

no wonder this is one of their best sellers wtf this man has IMMACULATE TASTE EYE—

AND THERE’S ONLY ONE (1) OF HIM IN THIS ENTIRE WORLD???!?

HUH!?!!?

life truly isn’t fair, huh

okay god i see you with favorites

now

let’s see here

very citrusy!!

also has that marine type of scent to it making it exceptionally aromatic!

not too much of a boujee scent like m&t where you would use on special events

this is more like a scent you would use on a daily basis going out

but upgraded

like you would smell fresh and expensive

kind of like a lowkey rich kid type of scent but you’re humble about it but lowkey kinda flexing yk?

this smell is BEAUT i love it omg i cant stop sniffing it

i’m a sucker for citrus scents :(

i’d wear this shit to school everyday if i could and have all my friends smell me

damn i bet his sweaters smell hella nice with this perfume :(

masculine or feminine? gender neutral

recommend? yes, yes, and yes.

rating? 10/10

tl;dr— jaehyun has expensive tastes and smells so fucking sexy how is he even real what the fUCk

[kozu-chan]

wolf boy!iwaizumi

hi i know i promised you something else but i literally cannot sleep so here are some frantic thoughts because i love hybrids lol

content warnings: fem!reader and also uhhh short!reader bc it’s me. basically me self-inserting bc i wish iwa was real 🥺

🐾 so you got iwa from the local shelter and when you heard that he was rescued from a hybrid fighting ring, your heart absolutely broke.

🐾 your first thought was “this guy needs to be protected at all costs. i’ll take him!”

🐾 and that’s how you ended up with hajime. he has these dark floppy ears and this really fluffy, bushy, dark tail.

🐾 he was really hard to deal with when you first took him home. he snarled a lot and would growl when you even attempted to touch him. but eventually he warmed up to you and you realized that iwa is really just one big puppy!!

🐾 he’s really smart too!! he listens to you and he is very good at communicating. he even told you to start calling him hajime because he loves you so much <3

🐾 whoever said that iwaizumi hajime is a bad boy doesn’t know him very well. once you get past his rough exterior, he’s a real softy.

🐾 when i say softy, i mean a SOFTY. mans loves to cuddle you and if you ever come back home after a while (ranging anywhere from 12 hours to over a week) he’ll come bounding towards you and tackle you in a hug!!

🐾 he’ll bury his face in your neck and grumble about how he missed you and you shouldn’t leave him again while pressing kisses into your face and neck.

🐾 he’ll usually shut up once you mention setting up a play date with the next door neighbor’s cat boy, oikawa instead of leaving him all alone in the house.

🐾 “never mind. i don’t want to be alone with shittykawa. i just want to be with you…”

🐾 pls hajime is such a good boy and such a sweetheart 🥺🥺

🐾 but don’t get me started on how overprotective he is!!

🐾 since hajime is super comfortable with you, he’s named himself your official unofficial guard dog (although it could possibly be an excuse to ward off other people since he wants you to be his and his only bc hey, possessive wolfie).

🐾 but every time you joke about him being your official unofficial boyfriend, he gets all flustered.

🐾 having an official unofficial bodyguard has its perks though. now you have someone to walk with you when it’s late or when it could be dangerous to be a small girl walking around.

🐾 ma’am you literally have scary dog privilege because NO ONE wants to mess with you and your beefy wolf boy.

🐾 he also helps you with shopping. he actually has good fashion taste so he’ll tell you his opinions on things you want to buy.

🐾 and since we have ourselves a big, strong, gentlemanly wolf boy, he gets things on the high shelf for you as well as carries most of the bags (we love ourselves an iwa pls can i have one irl 😩).

🐾 now let’s talk about when hajime gets tired…

🐾 he’s extra clingy when he’s tired. he usually has a hard exterior but when he’s tired, he practically melts for you.

🐾 he literally gets a little softer and he loves to drape himself over you 🥺🥺

🐾 but that’s hard because you’re so tiny compared to him…

🐾 “hajime please get off me! you’re so heavy and i can barely breathe!” “… no” *continues to snuggle into you while you groan*

🐾 that’s all i have to give you for now, but don’t forget to give hajime his goodnight kisses!! he won’t let anyone else know but he looks forward to it every night <3

[madfantasy]

I haven't seen you post in a while, I hope you've been doing okay? How is everything? Hope it's been a good year so far for you 💕💕

You're too kind, u & everyone who made inquiries, bless ur hearts.. im sorry for disappearing, but yeah, I don't have net— using my phone credit and hope this posts..

I tried to record my voice answering this, like I sometimes did on tik, suddenly ended up trying to muffle the floods of my burning tears, so now I have an awkward vid of me talking then weeping out of nowhere, which a good reason for me to keep up the no cry habit, heh.. but seriously, I suppose I'm fine till I be conscious of it.. its much easier for not to talk .. even tho I'm aching to be back in thy company, lonely in my foresight to catch on to the present that joins us, hand held out to reach like minded souls but shying from the fear of forgetfulness occurring..

I'm fine tho, did few new stuff, merely drowning in too muchness and nothingness as usual, this month I guess you could say I took an act of mad fury in search of any happy source because the echoing silence and the swarm of sadness nipping on my brain cells thickened, and the reasoning merged with the obscene. So instead of giving my guardians the usual of 3/4 of my earnings last month for net and groceries, I spent it all. Ya know, as it was told to me it mine to do as I please? As being prevented any chance of work if it was possible, 't was supposed to be spent on art supplies & measly delights craved for years ?

Before hand, I've been begging them to take me for months to get any clothing or whatever, be it the first time I ever see a shop, then just to drive around, then just me peaking to the outside when the front door is open, merely seeking change I suppose. They kept vaguely promising me until they refused point blank— getting tired of my nagging, then their car just stopped working till this day. Its in the workshop rn..

Anyway, befouled by despair, needing the mere basics of life and not granted, I was delighted when i found a site to buy from cheap & pretty, I pressed buy without any further considerations, or taking their permission and thrilled to be able get gifts for my siblings too. I say gifts but really they are deprived necessities too and not even much just one each cuz well, they are 5 of my babies and to start with the top of priorities; we all draw

I could already see it, they can't help themselves; heck seeped through the clenched gates of their mouths, trying desperately to poison me with undirect attempts this time, cuz I bought for my sibs they're out of the option of calling me selfish. I was upping the same trance like state of vague existence dealing with them, absorbing their insults and degrading just to make sure my shi arrives safe.

Unfortunate for me, the site chose the worst carrier in this country

I did everything in my power to make it into their convenience, by embarrassingly messaging the carrier daily, they took a week of promising to deliver and flanking so my guardians reached a heated level of threatening, waving their hands nd almost tossing shi at mE saying that they don't care if they came and if i dared to order something again they'll do this and that. Not allowing me to open the door for the delivery guy when he comes, blaming me for missing vaccination dates (they kept missing them even before)& missing going to important places(again, they just didn't go to for ages), made them loose sleep, etc etc— in turn, I seen red and regretfully blew up.

I screamed at them its literally the only time I ever did this, it BECAUSE it easier on them & I'll do what I want whatever anyway, & to stop interrupting me while I try to explain things , then they suddnly back done and be like I'm not mad at u I'm mad at the delivery ppl, that they are proud of me for being able to do all this, and such sort. I left them to cool in my room, Idk how I did it but must have slam-gripped something so hard it chipped most of my short nails & cracked one, was glad I didn't hurt my drawing hand but yeah, goofy mani

They robbed me of the joy of anticipation & the dissipation of apathy, I started to lose sleep again and my liberating dreams left me and I don't think I remember leaving bed.

But still, If not force myself to do things.. there'll be nothing for me if I don't.. at least I know im able of that

I got my guardians happy tho after another tiresome refusal, by trying out one of those Uber-eat like local apps here, since they have no car and being disabled & ill, I ordered McDonald's for the first time. Slythry behind their backs per habit, told them someone coming and they had that look again, but thankfully the guy came through and didn't steal my money, heh. For a big 1800 calories meal I suppose it was passable, the happy fam faces I got was the real treat..

Oh with that thing with the credit card stating I owe them money, waited weeks & nobody got back to us? They started taking from my guardian's account directly to pay it, saying oh we did send you warnings--- TO THE SHADOWY LINES OF THEIR POSTERIOR A.K.A NOWHERE. Thankfully the account is mostly empty nd just for random transactions, i alerted my guardians not to use it. And again, my god, another round of endless calls and promises started, and we wait again so they just don't act as if we owe them a frking 17k dollars that we don't have.. was panicking cuz I have nothing and but my guardians were weirdly comforting about it and told me not to worry

One thing good bout no net is it made me stop thinking about life in general, and stop the tiny unnoticeable prick of misery when I have no input to share, trying not to helplessly compare people just living, in inflated style or not, in media, to my isolated-most-of-my-life style and missing much of that organic "life experiences and chances", heh. At least, my situation would be favorable to me if it was ever possible for it to let me have peace, or have the simple knowledge I'm not virtually imprisoned and have never familiarised with nothing of this world but the surrounding walls.. its nice to have more time to be consumed by muse and day dreaming that flutters life through my dull being and sing chorus of inspiring means for art to flow and finds its way delicately onto my realised canvas.. but no, I continued drawing whilst sight blurred with salty droplets contradicting that happy tintin dance on tiktok I worked so long on just cuz I couldn't stop, not the tears or the mad scribbles of determined intention to visualise the mourned excitement I need, hating everything I make

Somehow the lilac dream still intrudes, visualising me friends, living, in a quaint home, maybe we roommate, arm in arm we go to make every fracture of fate's encounters a disgusting adventurous thrill, like building a maze of cardboard or chasing each other in the dark.. maybe getting that half bleached head and endless ear pericings ... then it dies and I totally forget it..

But what those awesome headphones helped me do, literally blocks all their voices listening to Sev losing it and I can Waltz around not feeling gutted to go and interfere or play the referee each time. But I can't wear them forever, gives me a bad headache, and honestly; I can't be too neglectful.. my sibs hates me for it already hehe

At least these clothing came true to their measurements, felt the new sensations on how everything I wore hugs me & learnt the baffling ways on how "gender" and region plays different tunes on the same measurements. Getting fitting things felt like suddenly there's hope to be, for myself to be me, and ease this severe disassociation between who I am, and what my body is .. from how little I see myself nd consider it worthy of anything because of how long it been living like a phantom among people.. to numb this dysphoria until it be gone one day

Saddened that the only site I can't order from again if they keep using that awful carrier

...

I missed our country's 91 national day, too. They made sales everything 91 riyal so.. but knowing the sellers here, I don't think most of em went true with their offers.. Horrible news tho on the celebrations, sigh

I turned this into a dear diary, guess bothered you enough today, sorry

So thankful to yous, Idk if I can be back, but I'll remain creating, and will keep the thought alive of being tickled when sharing my creations with your viewing pleasure somehow

'till then my precious dears, take care 💛🙏

26.9.2021, 8 pm, sleeping

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Consumerism won't defeat Georgia's Jim Crow

In the 1970s, progressives discovered a shortcut to political change: the boycott. Boycotts had been around for a long time, to be sure, but with industries in relatively weak states, with lots of competitors, the threat of lost business could spur fast action.

Politics were slow and unreliable. Lawsuits were expensive, slow and unreliable. Boycotts were fast, and involved direct, tangible steps that every person could take: redirect your spending from one company to another, make the change.

But as progressive movements ceded the political realm, reactionaries conquered it. Reagan and his successors (including pro-business Dems) enacted laws and policies that encouraged monopolies and weakened labor unions.

40 years later, boycotts are dead.

Hate excessive packaging?

Good news: the grocery aisle has minimal packaging alternatives you can vote your dollars on.

Bad news: these "alternatives" come from the same companies as the high-packaging products you're "voting against."

Boycotts only work when there's competition. As this Simpsons screenshot demonstrates - Duff Lite, Duff Dry and Duff all come from the same pipe.

Likewise: Fox Studios, who made the Simpsons, are now part of Disney.

Don't like Fox? Vote with your dollars on Disney!

Right-wing politics have a problem. If your fundamental belief is that a small number of people should have more (money, power, influence) than everyone else, then by definition, your politics only benefit a minority, and you win elections with majorities.

The right has three tactics to overcome this.

I. It relies on antimajoritarian institutions, like the Electoral College and the Senate. That's why the Dems should *absolutely* kill the filibuster, which protects Senate power, which is minority power, which is plute power.

II. It suppresses the votes and power of working people, through gerrymandering, poll taxes, voter-roll purges and anti-union rules that shatter the collective power of otherwise atomized and powerless workers.

III. It convinces turkeys to vote for Christmas. Performative culture-war bullshit, white nationalism, transphobic panics, etc - none of these are intrinsic to the right-wing project, but they bring a lot of scared bigots out to vote for dead-eyed corporate rule.

The new Jim Crow law just adopted in Georgia is a perfect example of how these three tactics deliver power to corporate power. It's a voter suppression law, passed by a gerrymandered statehouse that represents a minority of Georgians, which exploits white nationalism.

Remember, the reason corporate America is worried about Georgia is the Black, working-class-led political machine that threatens to enact majority rule in a place whose state and national leaders are essential to inequality-boosting, plute-enriching, worker-destroying rule.

The reason all these red states introduced nearly identical voter-suppression bills is that they all get their laws from the same place: ALEC, a business-backed thinktank that writes and pushes "model legislation" in state- and local governments.

https://www.salon.com/2021/03/27/conservative-groups-are-writing-gop-voter-suppression-bills---and-spending-millions-to-pass-them/

ALEC finds its wins in GOP legislatures, but it gets its funding from a broad cross-section of corporate America, including companies that publicly brief for racial and gender justice.

https://www.commoncause.org/democracy-wire/who-still-funds-alec/

Now, ALEC has faced something of an exodus, losing members like AT&T and Google, but that doesn't mean that they've divested from ALEC policies.

The politicians who carry water for ALEC are 100% dependent on campaign contributions from orgs like the Chamber of Commerce.

These politicians brief for policies that hurt the majority of Americans, and can only get elected through voter suppression, gerrymandering and appeals to bigotry. There's no other way to win electoral majorities while espousing antimajoritarian policies.

This doesn't mean that corporate execs and employees aren't horrified by Georgia's New Jim Crow law - it just means that they can't do anything about it. Companies that halt donations to the GA GOP will *still* financially support them, through their industry associations.

It's a perfect macrocosm of the consumer's dilemma: if you rely on money, rather than politics, to accomplish political change, you will never make a change that reduces the power of money in politics. It's impossible to spend your way out of monopoly capitalism.

At best, it's merely useless. At worst, it's a net negative, sucking up the hours you could spend on political change with comparison shopping. As Zephyr Teachout points out in BREAK 'EM UP, what you do matters more than what you spend.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/29/break-em-up/#break-em-up

If you're organizing to support union drives, don't waste time shopping to "buy local" for posterboard and markers - they're all manufactured by anti-union monopolists, no matter who sells them. Get whatever's easiest and then go fight the companies in the *political* realm.

Stop conceiving of yourself as an ambulatory wallet, whose only power comes from where and how you spend - if you only vote your dollars, you'll always lose, because the rich have more dollars than you and so they get more votes.

Keep your eyes on the prize: smashing corporate power. Far more exciting than the MLB boycott of Georgia is the Republican response: GOP hardliners want to take away baseball's antitrust exemption.

https://twitter.com/matthewstoller/status/1378103553437360131

If this happens, it will be the absolute best possible outcome - because it represents the shattering of the coalition that makes antimajoritarian politics possible. If the right starts siding with bigots and AGAINST companies, they'll cut their own supply lines.

The voter suppression, gerrymandering and bigotry that the GOP relies on is expensive. It can't exist without corporate power. The reason it exists in the first place is corporate power.

Reinvigorating antitrust as an act of performative culture-war bullshit is the political equivalent of pointing a gun at your own dick to own the libs and then blowing your actual dick off.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/05/27/literal-gunhumping/#youll-shoot-your-eye-out

These are the fracture lines we need to exploit. They've been proliferating for years. The modern antitrust revival comes out of these fracture lines.

It's an open secret that much of the money and energy for anti-Big Tech trustbusting comes from the cable industry.

Comcast and AT&T hate Google and Facebook, but not for the same reason you or I do. In their view, the billions Googbook make from surveillance, rent-extraction and manipulation have been misapproriated from the telecoms industry.

They have made the catastrophic blunder of betting that if they awaken the slumbering antitrust giant to smash Big Tech, that it will then go back to sleep - and that it *certainly won't turn on *them*.

This is such galaxy-brain idiocy. Like the public will watch a new army of trustbusters arise to rip apart Googbook and then say, "You know what? I just *fucking love Comcast*, so whatever you do, don't give them the same treatment."

A bet that after the dust settles, the hard-fighting lawyers, activists, politicans and workers who smashed corporate power in Big Tech will realize that they were only worried about "surveillance capitalism" but were totally cool with all the other kinds of capitalism.

Consumer power is a dead letter. Political power is a live wire. Boycotts are a distraction, even - especially - when giant corporations engage in them.

But the other stuff - strikes, trustbusting, ending financial secrecy - that's where change comes from.

The problem with the world isn't where you shop.

You're not an ambulatory wallet and don't let anyone convince you that you are.

[pallasperilous]

Boneless Wings

 {AO3 version}

So, blah blah blah, it’s their standard-issue disaster: pack of dumbass witches (always with the dumbass witches. Where do they find the time for this shit? Somebody get these women signed up for a Peloton subscription or a macramé class or a vibrator of the month club, seriously, whatever it takes—), ancient curse, Castiel being the actual angel of stepping in it, nobody cares. 

The point is, two hundred and forty-one hours of binge-worthy drama later, Dean and Cas are living in a semi-detached just a short thirty-minute commute to somewhere equally lame, Castiel has two literal-ass wings, and yes, Susan, they kiss now. 

The neighbors are weirdly cool with it. 

For those of you perving along at home, Dean could absolutely provide a list of the hundred or so ways that having a boyfriend* with giant fucking actual wings is super hot and/or awesome.

This is not that list.

(*you can just shut right the fuck up , Sam, because it’s either this or Dean will start saying lover. And nobody needs that. Nobody wants that.)

1.  Bird mites. Holy shit. 

 2.  Sharing a bathroom. The shower curtain rod, and consequently the security deposit, are early casualties. The medicine cabinet follows swiftly behind. Shower hijinks are not even an option.

 3.  Dean comes home one day from a gig and there is a giant plastic green turtle in the backyard. A closer inspection reveals that the turtle is actually a mule for about half a truck bed of industrial dust ‘n grit. It is, in fact, a kiddie sandbox. Dean points out that they do not, in fact, have a small child (FINGERS CROSSED), so...?

Cas then earnestly shows him an entire playlist of exotic birdy dust bath videos on Youtube. 

Dean then earnestly shows him the garden hose. 

4.  The down just gets, like...everywhere. EVERYWHERE. How many times have Sam and Dean practically sold their kidneys for a single angel feather for some dumb spell to solve some pointless Occult McProblem? And now Dean is picking them out of his damn teeth every morning. (No, gross, not because of... Jesus, no, that is not a thing.)

On the upside of this one, Dean finally has an excuse to buy a Dyson, which he’s secretly always thought looked awesome. It is. 

 5.  When Dean is scraping out the umpteenth canister of fluff he jokingly suggests they use some of it to supplement the tragically flaccid down comforter currently shaming their bed, and Castiel pitches an existential fucking sulk. Dean wants to experience happiness again, so he does not point out that it get ass-bitingly cold here this time of year, and decent bedding is not exactly inexpensive, and the Dyson kind of maxed them out on household purchases.

But whatever.

 6.  Castiel is indulging in what Dean thinks of as a sky pout when he flies right into a head-on with li’l Timmy NextDoor’s new Christmas surveillance drone. It dings the shit out of one of Cas’s left primary feathers (the scientific term is “those big motherfuckers”), which apparently hurts like a bitch. Cas is grounded for a few weeks after that and is cutely pathetic about it and at first Dean is absolutely down to kiss it better. By the end, Dean is almost ready to strangle Cas with his own necktie, but he has learned a lot of surprisingly interesting stuff about ancient Mesopotamia, like that it was super horny.

 7.  After the snow melts, Dean starts finding shit on the front step with the morning paper. It’s not even a good newspaper; Cas signed them up for the local fish-wrapper (or maybe it was Sam, before he fled for the hills— he occasionally breaks out in a  “support local journalism” rash). The crossword puzzle is insulting, but the paper does at least syndicate Carolyn Hax, whom Dean secretly suspects of being an absolute wildcat in the sack, so he grudgingly expends the calories to bring it in every morning. 

Anyway, at first the stuff he discovers crapping up the welcome mat is just shiny bits of trash — couple granola wrappers, some MGD pull-tabs, a few field-stripped twisty-ties. Probably just windblown, and he tosses it in the garbage can. 

Then a couple weeks in, things start getting...grisly? It escalates real slowly, from a variety platter of mouse bits to squirrel à la power line and then half of a dry-aged raccoon and an opossum that has recently graduated from playing dead to professional dead-being. The neighborhood crows obviously love that their front step is now a roadkill café; Dean has to bat increasing numbers of them away with the kitchen broom in order to relocate their horrible snack to the edge of the nearest storm drain.

Then one morning there are like twenty crows and they’re in just the cutest little football huddle-up around what turns out to be a human fucking finger with a retro-fun mood ring still on the knuckle (it’s feeling: Sad) and Dean fully loses his shit. 

Cas hears him freaking out and comes whomping out of the garage ready to, whatever, flap somebody to death maybe, but as soon as he establishes that Dean doesn’t need anything more than a fresh pair of boxers, he de-poofs a bit and assesses the whole human finger/crows situation in his usual infuriatingly unrushed way. The crows had mostly bounced up to the cable line over the house, safely out of brooming range, but one by one they start to drop down and hippity-hop back towards the world’s tiniest crime scene.

If Dean were five percent less freaked he’d be tempted to go inside and find out how much of a dent he can make in a six-pack before Castiel finally dings and spits out his results, but he isn’t, so he just stands there in silence clutching the broom like it’s a shotgun.

Eventually Cas says “hm,” and then he looks at the crows and makes some noises that sound like a spoon caught in a garbage disposal, and the crows make some scrawps and chuks back, and then one of them delicately noodges the tip of dead finger with its beak and then hippity hops back a foot or two, bows, and then they all fly away over the shitty little beige duplex across the street like they’re running ten minutes late to an important bird appointment.

Castiel stands up (Dean reflexively backs up into the doorway, as this involves Cas bomfing out his wings a bit for ballast and Dean has caught a blow to the nuts on more than one occasion), dusts off his goddamn slacks, pulls a plastic evidence baggie out of thin goddamn air or maybe his socks, and casually bags the finger like they’re doing a standard FBI wheeze. “So what,” Dean says, as Cas diligently zips the baggie, “the fuck?”

“Oh,” Cas says, blinking in surprise that Dean is still there and interested, “they think I’m their god.”

Dean kind of stares back at him, the six feet of dude and like sixteen feet of bird, and thinks sure, okay, but his face must still be stuck on “Tippi Hedren attic scene” because Cas puts a reassuring hand on Dean’s shoulder and adds “Don’t worry. I’ve told them I don’t require further offerings, and I reassured them that you’re my consort and were simply jealous of other potential mates.”

It takes Dean two weeks to come up with a response to that, but by then it’s become evident that no bird is ever going to shit on the Impala again, so he decides to just chalk it up in the win column and move on.

You know. The family business.

8.  No matter how tightly he folds them, Cas can’t fit his wings through the definitely-not-up-to-code doorway of the wood-paneled family rec room in the basement, so Dean claims it as his man cave and dubs it the “No Fly Zone.” 

Castiel doesn’t find this funny, but Dean really only uses it to fold laundry. 

 9.  Transpo is an obvious issue. Cas can almost stuff himself into the Impala if he sort of reverse-cowgirls the back seat, but then the wingtips smoosh up against the windshield and Dean’s visibility is approximately zip. And, sure, Cas could fly himself anywhere they really needed to go, he’s basically a Chevy Of The Air, but sometimes it’s raining, and the seraph Castiel — Shield of God, Heavenly Soldier of the Lord, multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent, will smell like a wet fucking chicken for days afterward. Febreze does not help.

Dean spends a few nauseating weeks contemplating the purchase of — and here he learns that the human gag reflex can be conditioned, but never truly eradicated — a convertible. Once Cas brings up the possibility of a minivan or perhaps a station wagon (he’s taken to studying family motor vehicles with all the intensity of a birder with a life list) and Dean makes him sleep on the couch.

Dean gets his own living room rotation after he shows Cas a Craigslist posting for a very reasonably priced horse trailer. Castiel points out that it’s used and Dean notes that neither of them is exactly mint in original packaging either. Castiel points out that he’s not a horse, and after a few necessary but admittedly unoriginal jokes, Dean pulls up a website with an exhaustive photographic tutorial on how to convert a horse trailer “for the safe and sanitary transport of ostriches, emus, and/or cassowaries.” Cas points out that he’s not an ostrich, emu, and/or cassowary, and Dean counters that he clearly isn’t, because an emu would probably show a little more gratitude, and that’s how Dean learns that the couch has a broken spring under the left cushion. The transpo issue remains unresolved.

 10.  Dean keeps a pair of shop-grade safety goggles by his side of the bed. It’s not the sexiest look, but it turns out feathers are stabby as hell when encountered at a particular angle. Cas can do the healy thing, of course, but they learn the hard way that cornea perforation is not really a mood enhancer. On the bright side, Castiel accidentally corrects Dean’s incipient presbyopia, which means Dean doesn’t have to hold the newspaper at arm’s length anymore when he’s idly speculating what Carolyn Hax looks like below the neck. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.

 11.  You’d think that, when you’re coming down from a time-limited but incurable curse that makes you feel like every cell of your body has its own cute little individual headcold — because you missed a hex bag due to the fact that you were preparing your legal response to Sam turning up to the hunt wearing a goddamn hair scrunchy, as if he were fresh off the set of a very special episode of Clarissa Explains It All — anyway, you’d think that being wrapped in the warm embrace of an angel’s wings would be nice. 

But you would be wrong, because apparently your boyfriend has been out communing with the bees again, and those feathers pick up ragweed pollen like it’s their goddamn job, and guess what else angels can’t cure? Dean will take Motherfucking Seasonal Allergies for 600, Alex. 

12a.  One of the neighbors has that homesteading hippie brain disease that drives an otherwise normal-seeming person to brew their own beer and raise a bunch of chickens despite living within five hundred yards of a fully functioning Hy-Vee. There’s a week where one of the wee little velociraptors seems to be processing some kind of trauma because it starts yelling at dawn and keeps going until well past the hour that swearing is allowed on network TV. 

When Dean finally hammers on the front door the next afternoon the neighbor apologizes with some extremely nasty home-brew (HIPPIES) and some absolutely devastating weed (HIPPIES!) and explains that “Ginger is going through a rough molt” and then he kind of nods his head towards Dean’s side of the fence where Cas is futzing around in the squash plants and stage whispers (this is a direct quote) “You know how they get.”

Dean is about to rip the dude a new one for comparing his immortal space-kaiju lover to a fucking Australorp yard pullet when Castiel pops his head up over the white pickets and breezily contributes “Bad molt, yes, those are terrible, Dean can tell you all about how insufferable I am those weeks,” and sometimes Dean just doesn’t know why he even tries.

 12b.  The less said about angel molt, the better. 

Seriously, the freakin’ eyes-on-his-hands naked mole rat dude from, whatsit, Pan’s Labyrinth of Subtitles, would run screaming from this shit. 

 13.  There’s a 4th of July BBQ Potluck Block Party and Dean’s inability to stand idly by while good meat is abused ( shut up Sam ) means he winds up manning the grill and dismissing the pretenders to set some strictly inedible things on fire. Cas hangs out next to him and uses his flappers to kinda whupf the smoke away from Dean’s eyes now and then, which rules. It’s actually a pretty chill event until Sharon and Don From Number 4267, The Green House With The White Trim, turn up with a giant Pyrex full of naked, still-marinating teriyaki wings. 

Sharon And Don look down at their wings and then up at Castiel and then down at the wings and then up at Castiel and they are clearly teetering on the edge of a Midwestern politeness failure-based nervous breakdown. But then Cas, smooth as a margarine commercial, gently takes the dish from Sharon’s frozen hands, examines the contents for a silent moment, and says “it’s alright. They weren’t personal friends.”

He gets an extra burger for that one.

 14.  Cas keeps absent-mindedly trying to groom Dean — who, in case it still needs to be said at this point, possesses zero-point-zero feathers of his own — so he goes after Dean’s hair, instead. Dean has to stop him after his second hour of trying to straighten out a cowlick. “I don’t understand how you can steer properly with this deformity,” Cas says, as if it’s a genuine miracle that Dean isn’t constantly careening over ottomans like Dick Van Dyke. He’s even more horrified by Dean’s (frankly minimal) use of hair gel. “Jesus, Cas, it’s not like I’m drinking it,” he says, but then one time they have an epic make-out session shortly after Dean performs his masculine beauty rituals and there’s some smearage of various types of Product (tm) on the flappy areas. 

And, sonuvabitch, for the next six hours Cas is spirographing around the house like he has a heavenly inner ear infection, and he only stops veering into the doorframes after Dean wipes down every. Single. Feather. With mineral oil and about eighteen clean shop cloths. Dean switches to something called hair wax, which costs thirty zillion times more per ounce and makes him smell vaguely like church, but is a lot less gloppy. The things we do for love.

 15.  Seating inside the house is a bit of a conundrum, too. Cas can kind of flop his wings out to the sides if he sits in the middle of the couch, but then Dean’s stuck on the recliner, which is basically in the next county. Bar stools are disastrously tippy, Dean’s lower back and hips have not endured mumble-mumble years of hunting just to be subjected to a damn beanbag chair, and, after a brief flurry of optimistic excitement, Dean determines that they’d have to take the front door off to get a massage chair in. He finds a swing online that if, he can get the hardware properly installed in the crossbeam, is rated for up to 500 pounds, so he texts Cas the URL so he can check out the specs. After half an hour he writes back —

CASTIEL: Dean

CASTIEL: I believe this swing is intended for sexual congress.

DEAN: ...

CASTIEL: I can infer from the ellipsis that you have spent several minutes attempting to draft a response.

DEAN: ...

CASTIEL: Dean

DEAN: it’s multipurpose

  16 . On the plus side, though, big-ass wings make for a pretty good drying rack. He can get every sock in the house laid out on those suckers in a single round and, one episode of Dr. Sexy later, they’re perfectly dry and toasty warm, without any of the pair-busting casualties Dean has learned to expect from the apparently socknivorous dryer in the basement. 

Dean assumes it’s just the product of good air circulation and body heat until he realizes that he hasn’t had to toss a pair for being too worn out in...maybe six months? So he asks Cas “Are your wings... healing the socks” and after an entire Abbott and Costello routine centering around heal versus heel, Dean determines that the answer is: yes, his boyfriend’s wings are channeling the almighty power of Heaven to magically repair the socks Dean buys at Target in twelve-pack bags. On sale.

This is actually kind of sexy, if Dean is being perfectly honest, so, you know what? It doesn’t belong on this list.

 16.  So nobody really freaks out or bursts into tears or calls the news or the FBI or anything when Cas goes out in public with him, which Dean is secretly a little disappointed about, because come on. (Maybe giant wings just reads as a gay thing? Was there an episode of Will and Grace about this that Dean missed back when he was ass deep in wendigos or something?)

But no. Dudes tend to just glance at them across the Home Depot parking lot, throw them the Mutual Dude Acknowledgement Nod, and say some shit like “Comic-con,” or “nice anime” in a knowing tone. Then they go back to rolling their carts full of gaskets or hammers or whatever back to their mom’s station wagon. 

Little girls tend to go googly-eyed — Castiel seems to fall into the same category as a Disney princess, despite the stubble and the drabcore wardrobe, and Dean can’t count the number of times some mom has approached Dean at the grocery store (like he’s Castiel’s manager?? Which, okay...yeah, actually) and asked if they do birthday parties. The money would actually be pretty tempting if Dean weren’t five thousand percent sure that Cas would get them both arrested by launching into an anatomy lesson about duck sex or how God is a loser who favors relaxed fit jeans and Wild Turkey.

The worst is white ladies of a Certain Age, and it always seems to happen in the pudding aisle, for some reason. They either go cross-eyed with horniness and become indiscriminately handsy (Dean can’t blame them for the impulse, but also back off, Karen), or ask Cas for prayers for their cat’s chronic asshole problems (which Castiel WILL take seriously). 

Worst of all is when some hippie spinster clocks them. This woman inevitably reaches right for the feathers and asks in a willowy voice if they’d ever consider turning some of them into dreamcatchers to sell at her studio, which is literally always named The Faerie’s Glen. Then Cas gets confused about why, exactly, a sixty year-old WASP in a peasant skirt would need to call on the infant-protection powers of an Ojibwe spider goddess, while Dean just wants to bite the lady’s fingers off. 

Either way, it’s always a bad scene, and many fully loaded grocery carts have been lost to the fallout.

17.  For some metaphysical reason Dean is too dumb to suss out but also too smart to question, lugging a pair of Cessna-sized flappers around this mortal dimension actually seems to tucker Cas out. He doesn’t need to zonk out every night, but he semi-regularly throws in the towel and actually crawls in with Dean for the duration. 

This would be swell in theory, but the guy absolutely cannot settle the fuck down in less than three (3) human hours, which is the exact amount of sleep Dean requires to maintain his famously sunny demeanor. It’s not just ye olde tossing and turning — Dean can handle that, sharing a bed with Sam is like sleeping next to a kangaroo with restless leg syndrome — no, it’s a nonstop parade of little flippy-flappies and shiffle-shuffles and spontaneous outbursts of preening. 

So Dean makes him a Baby Sleep Sack. 

This is something Dean knows about due solely to one super dumb hunt involving a banishing sigil that had to be drawn in — he still feels like this had to be a misprint — human breastmilk, and that was obviously not happening. But the monster of the week wasn’t going to banish itself, so they wound up at the nearest Walmart, at 4am, picking up what turned about to be an unnecessarily generous supply of baby formula, along with a fresh box of shotgun shells because God bless America*. It doesn’t work, although “lots of stabbing” turns out to be a solid fallback plan, but the point is that while Sam was debating between Digestion Support or Neurological Development, Dean acquired an unprecedented familiarity with some of the products currently available to the sleep-deprived parent. So Dean finds some DIY Baby Sleep Sack knockoff patterns online and determines he can replicate and scale up the concept with some beach towels and duct tape, and the next morning he presents the lumpy but totally functional prototype to Castiel. 

Initially Cas thinks it’s a sex thing (reasonable, it probably is), but once they clear up that misunderstanding, he’s obviously a little peeved by the concept of being swaddled as if he were a gassy baby instead of a deathless sky monster in a sexy dude-shaped can. But Dean must be giving off some serious man on the edge vibes because Cas grudgingly agrees to let Dean tape him up the next time he’s feeling dozy. 

It’s real awkward and takes forever to get Cas bundled up right, and then he’s just kind of lying there on top of the sheets, like an enormous, grumpy baked potato. 

“I could easily break out of these restraints,” he says in a pissy tone after Dean has crawled in and turned off the light, and Dean rolls over to tell him “no shit”, but then he has to stop himself because the guy is already asleep.

Eventually they upgrade to a version made out of some of those trendy weighted blanket things, a few yards of parachute silk, and a whole lot of velcro. The dude looks so damn peaceful that Dean is honestly a little jealous.

*he doesn’t, actually. 

 18.  There’s a sunny afternoon that isn’t the usual Kansas is trying to murder you level of humid so Dean rolls the Impala out into the street for a wash. Cas helps him out a bit initially, although tragically not in a way that involves removing any unnecessary articles of clothing, but Deans sends him to grab a new tub of wax from the shed and he never comes back. After half an hour Dean needs a beer break and goes looking for him, expecting to find Cas lost in thought over whether Turtle Wax is made of actual turtles, or is made to put on actual turtles. Instead he finds Cas crouched on the shimmering pavement at the back of the driveway, sun beating down on him like it has a personal vendetta, and he’s got both wings stretched out real low above the ground. Dean kind of flips out because it’s the type of pose that just screams “stabbed in gut by angel blade” or “migraine from Hell, literally.”

Then Cas looks up, which pulls his wings up a smidge too, which in turn reveals that fully half a dozen neighborhood cats are lounging in the shady patch beneath his wings, spread out on the concrete like blobs of furry peanut butter. No, it’s actually eight cats. There are eight cats.

“Ling-Ling was feeling a little overheated,” Cas says, as if this explains everything. 

And, you know what, at this point, it does.

 19.  Dean has faith that eventually Sam or Cas or the third demon from the left in the second row will turn up a solution for the whole business. Castiel will get to tuck those bad boys back into the secret wing-closet dimension and he won’t have to worry about getting stuck in stairwells anymore, or being reported to the FAA (again). Then they can finally pack up the house, plaster over the more egregious spots of drywall damage, and go back to killing things outside of the tri-county area. The whole thing has been a pretty embarrassing interlude for a couple of dudes who’ve kicked Satan’s ass multiple times — Sam is probably telling other hunters that they’ve been deep undercover to take out a nest of suburban vampires, or a pack of ghouls with mortgages, instead of vacuuming angel down out of the AC unit and considering a Costco membership. 

And sure, there have been some...serious pluses to the situation (see: the other list), but, in his weaker moments, Dean has to admit that he’s kind of going to miss some of the goofy, irritating shit, too — like finding a six-inch feather in the veggie crisper (how? why?), or watching Cas fwap his wings out just in time to accidentally clothesline a jogger, or even the strangely compelling, sorta cheesy smell that starts to float around the house if Cas goes a little too long between hosedowns. 

He has actually grown fond of this shit. Which is 100% the least sexy thing on earth, it’s some genuinely, seriously pathetic goo goo crap, and that’s why nobody will ever hear a fucking word about it. People will ask “so what’s it like, with the wings” and Dean will waggle his eyebrows suggestively and review the highlight reel over an inadvisable amount of rail whiskey. His secret’s safe with, well. Him.

 20.  Seriously though, the bird mites. 

Gross.

[millenniumfae]

Video Game Cooking: Nectar (Hades 2018)

Nectar is one of the in-game items Zagreus can collect. By gifting these bottles of golden liquid to other characters, he raises his affinity with them, which in turn gives him powerup items and advances character questlines. 

Hades (2018) is a retelling/adaptation of the classical Persephone and Hades mythos. All items, settings, and characters are from classic Greek mythology; Zagreus’ foster mother is the primordial goddess of night. Achilles’ personal questline is about reuniting him with his lover Patrocles. Zagreus has spent his entire life sheltered underground in Tartarus, so he doesn’t know what birds are, or what winter is. 

In turn, ‘nectar’ exists in Greek mythology. It’s sometimes interchangeable with ambrosia; both are the legendary foods/drinks of the gods, said to grant immortality to anyone who consumes them, amongst other positive effects. In-game, nectar is the more commonplace counterpart to ambrosia; Zagreus finds nectar as a dungeon drop. But he needs to defeat the champion of Elysium boss to gain a single bottle of ambrosia.

Today, we’re gonna re-create the nectar of Hades (2018) for ourselves! It may be contraband in Hades’ domain, but it’s not like anyone pays attention to that rule, anyways.

Why are we recreating nectar, and not ambrosia? Because there already exists tons of ‘ambrosia’ drink recipes. Maybe not based off of the Hades (2018) version, but there’s nothing new or exciting in making yet another ambrosia drink. Nectar, on the other hand, gives us more room for invention.

Hades (2018) Nectar Recipe  (Makes One Serving)

1 1/3 cups Martinelli's sparkling cider

2 tablespoons orange flower water

1 tablespoon honey

1/4 teaspoon edible gold shimmer powder (make sure it lists all ingredients, and is certified food safe)

A pinch of coarse sea salt

A pinch of lemon zest

A drop of mint extract

The first times Zagreus gifts nectar to npcs, they describe honoring some sort of godhood custom and exchange with him with a ‘keepsake’ - an in-game powerup he can wear. Unlike with gifting ambrosia, their eyes don’t pop out with shock at receiving such a luxurious gift, it’s instead just something nice, even if relatively commonplace. But nectar is still prestigious enough that gifting the actual Olympic gods nectar goes over well.

If ambrosia is the equivalent of Zagreus gifting $30,000,000 Breguet watches to his friends and family, then nectar is the gourmet-wrapped basket of cheese and crackers you see in the ‘gift’ section of the grocery store. Something you spot while on errands, and impulsively buy so you have a hostess gift the next time someone invites you over. It’s a gift borne of societal custom, and implores the giftee to give you something in return, eventually. Everyone from your multimillionaire uncle Poseidon to your humble jailbird neighbor Sisyphus are pleased to receive such a gift, even if they might value its contents differently.

(In the early-access versions of the game, nectar was ambrosia. The final release wrote ambrosia as the coveted, rare prize you earn after defeating the champions of Elysium. True enough, Zagreus can only find ambrosia after defeating the Elysium boss.)

In original Greek mythology, ‘nectar’ and ‘ambrosia’ aren’t two distinct things. Homer describes nectar as the god’s drink, and ambrosia is the food. But in Sappho’s and Anaxandrides’s poems, it’s the opposite. There’s more recorded mentions of ‘ambrosia’, rather than nectar. Some take this to mean that both nectar and ambrosia can be seen as something both food and drink, like honey.

Both share canonical similarities. Ambrosia and nectar are fragrant foods/drinks, sometimes used as literal perfume by the gods. Makes sense that nectar smells good, if in the AD period we’ve taken the word to mean the sweet stuff within flowers.

Other than its smell, we’ve no canonical information about nectar (other than in the Odyssey, nectar is described as either ‘rose-red’ in color, or in scent). Hades (2018) rendered nectar’s appearance as an opaque, warm gold liquid in a cute little round bottle, wrapped with a ribbon to benefit its ‘gift merchandise’ reputation.        

Nobody in Hades (2018) describes the taste/smell of nectar. Ambrosia, on the other hand, is said to be rare ‘vintages’ that you’re guaranteed to like. Sometimes, gifting either results in a cutscene where Zagreus and co. hang out at the lounge, complete with a sound clip of uncorking a bottle and pouring it into a tall glass. You can also see characters drink nectar amongst each other, savoring both the occasion and the taste. Eurydice also offers a ‘Refreshing Nectar’ power up item, which just kinda looks like normal nectar but in a tall glass. 

There’s a clear alcohol equivalence. But nobody references drunkeness in-game. Even original classical Greek culture didn’t have a drunk culture like we do; wine was revered, but it was mixed with water to be savored, not to intoxicate oneself. Maybe nobody in-game can get drunk in the first place; everyone’s either an immortal, or a ghost.

(In my opinion, it’s always a bit weird when videogame characters can nurture deep, trusting relationships purely built upon a system of gifting items. But Hades (2018) does make it clear that Zagreus already has established relationships with most of the cast.)

Ambrosia’s a rare vintage. So what does that make nectar? We need to make something sweet, pleasant, attractive-looking, and also tangibly related to its rarer sibling. So we’re using another liquid that’s distilled and sometimes fermented; apple cider. 

A bit of this decision comes from the soundbite of opening up a nectar in the lounge; it’s a thin viscosity with a slight hint of foam, almost sounding like beer. And the color matters too, since different distillations of apple cider can result in different colors, ranging from dark brown to a light, bright gold.

Apple juice, when fermented, can have alcohol contents going from light apple wine, to brandies that have 10-25% alcohol. As a culinary ingredient, its modest fructose content means a higher temperature tolerance, and its citric acid can be used as a brine. It’s a popular ‘new world’ ingredient in cooking and baking. 

It’s also an ‘old world’ food. Hades (2018) doesn’t take itself super seriously, with its foil-wrapped gyros and french fries as in-game healing items. But any character/worldbuilding they do have, they keep it consistent. 

Zagreus says that Hermes’ symbol “almost looks like a bat wing”, when it’s very clearly a bird wing. Because he’s lived underground his whole life, he doesn’t know what a bird is. Weapons upgraded with the aspect of people like Guan Yu, or King Arthur, are time-bending powers that no one has ever heard of, with hints that these mysterious people live in places with their own gods/mythology. Zagreus catches a trout/bass/sturgeon fish for the first time, and it’s completely foreign to him, but Achilles fondly recalls these Greece-native fish fitting of his Nereid heritage. Characters have discussions about how mortals fear death, despite Thanatos being a gentle god represented by butterflies. There’s no sun, therefore no time, in the underworld. Hades is the god of minerals as well as the underworld, hence gems and diamonds being an in-game loot. 

Apples originated in Central Asia. During the Classical Greek era, they would have resembled what we call crabapples; small, hard, sour, cherry-sized. “At the Sammardenchia-Cueis site near Udine in Northeastern Italy, seeds from some form of apples have been found in material carbon dated to around 4000 BCE.”

It implores me to find ingredients that fit the setting, as with my other Video Game Cooking recipes. No pumpkins, no corn, potatoes, chocolate, tomatoes, vanilla. Instead, we have things like almonds, lentils, oranges, honey, garlic, onions (haha, suck it Achilles)

To reflect nectar’s ‘sweet smelling’ trait, we’re using an ingredient common in Persian cooking - and later the French royal court of King Louis; orange flower water. I found mine in my local Asian grocery. It’s a byproduct of making essential oil, and it’s colorless/flavorless, but with a strong aromatic smell that affects any food you mix it with. It’s also a known ingredient in modern day Greece, called anthonero (ανθόνερο). 

(Eeurydice is confirmed to use both nectar and ambrosia as a cooking ingredient, and her food is apparently amazing. Maybe one day, I’ll make another Video Game Cooking recipe based off of her Pom Porridge, or Ambrosia Delights.) 

And to really make it look like the food of the gods, we’re adding an ingredient found more and more in swanky bars worldwide; edible glitter powder. Originally, people only used this to decorate baked goods and candies, but come Instagram, people are making these really picturesque cocktails that shimmer rainbow. You gotta be careful when buying these for yourself, though; the tiny tins of decorative edible shimmer power you find at Michaels may not actually be as edible as they claim. I found Bakell-brand Luster Dust at a bake-supply shop. If it doesn’t list its ingredients, or certify itself as FDA-approved, then don’t use it for food.

And since it’s called ‘nectar’, we’re also adding honey. Which has long history of its divine status as a holy food. To take down the intense sweetness a bit, the tinest pinch of sea salt - another holy, pure substance. And to really bring out the brightness of the apples, we’re adding a sprinkle of lemon zest. A tiny drop of mint extract brings a complex depth to the orange flower smell.

To make a glass of nectar; cover the bottom of the glass with mint, lemon, sea salt, honey, and orange flower water. Then, pour the apple cider with the gold shimmer dust together, so that the two mix together a bit, to avoid clumping of the powder. Then you mix the drink a bit, so that the honey, zest, and salt aren’t sitting at the bottom.

It only now occurs to me that this recipe might actually be a rendition of Eurydice’s Refreshing Nectar item, rather than pure nectar itself. But just take my word for it; when you open up a bottle of nectar, you get that whiff of blossoms with the slight coldness of mint, and the sea salt/honey taste goes really well with the apple juice. I imagine that Eurydice’s somehow making a further delicious drink by adding a splash of Bailoni and ice. 

Enjoy! Just imagine that you’re hanging out with Zagreus and his three partners, cracking a cold one open over stories about how crazy the surface world is. Did you know that we have machines called computers that instantly relay information all over the world??

[petewentzisblack1312]

is starting a record collection an expensive hobby? im considering starting one tbh

it absolutely is anon its so expensive and very inconvenient. its a terrible hobby for beginners. i love it to death though.

the fact is records are kind of an investment as a physical music medium, because theyre significantly more expensive than any other medium for listening to music. the actual apparatus to listen to records is also pricey. although theres cheap players you can get like the crosley cruiser, for a lot of reasons those can do a lot of damage to your albums really quickly compared to others. if youre mostly interested in the novelty or aesthetic (which i want to be super clear, is totally fine and normal) then its fine and probably even recommended, but if youre interested in regularly listening to music on vinyl or the longevity and preservation of your collection id recommend making the investment. i think those cutesy turntables are a nice way to get people interested and good for when youre not sure if you really want to stick to it but if it becomes a long term hobby you should definitely see to upgrading.

if youre wondering why anyone would do this at all if its so expensive, its kind of the same reason people buy physical books when its more expensive and inconvenient than ebooks. its nice to have a way to tangibly and physically engage with the music youre listening to, and its doubly nice if the record itself is nice to look at and well made/packaged. theres a lot of super cool stuff you can do with vinyl that you cant do with digital music, just like theres a lot of cool stuff you can do with digital music you cant do with vinyl. some people just like to have pretty records to look at, some people (who are insane /lh) only listen to music on vinyl for the experience, and some people, like me, like to have pretty records and the tangible experience of dropping the needle and flipping the record and switching out discs and all that. its like a stim for me.

anyway, besides getting old turntables used from craigslist or ebay or a thrift shop (which can be really cheap!) id recommend the AT LP60 or any of its other models for a budget option or the AT LP120 as a solid first investment. if you go for the former youll likely have to upgrade relatively soon but the latter can last you literally forever unless it gets some major damage. thats another thing with cheap turntables, if something goes wrong (and there are a billion things that can go wrong) you have to buy a whole new turntable, while others are extremely modular and (provided you find yourself sticking with the hobby) last years and even decades with a few upgrades as you find yourself needing them. plus these turntables come with a built in preamp which means less expense for you unless you want to upgrade. you also need a pair of speakers, for beginners id recommend getting active speakers since it takes another thing off youre list and means you just need the speakers and the turntable to start listening to records.

as for finding the records, while it is definitely more expensive than any other medium (other than maybe wax cylinders because those are stupid and worse than records in every conceivable way and thats saying something) there are plenty of ways to find savings. going directly to your local record store and crate digging is one way, youll often find used records in good condition. discogs is a great website for finding physical music, especially records. ebay is fine but its prices are generally not as competitive as discogs.

some tips and notes:

coloured vinyl does not sound worse than black vinyl thats a rumour that was started by old white men who were upset teen girls find records pretty (except glow in the dark, that does sound worse)

a lot of things people say are absolutely necessary really and truly arent but that makes it really hard to figure out which things are actually absolutely necessary.

in that vein if someone tells you that you need to remove the preamp from your at lp120 run very quickly in the opposite direction they are an audiophile and cannot be trusted

hold your records by the outer edge and the label instead of pinching the edge and DO NOT touch the grooves.

clean your records with a microfiber cloth before playing them.

i recommend replacing the paper innersleeves with nicer ones.

do not stack records, keep them upright like a book, and also dont keep too many of them squished up close together, and also dont let them lean on each other too much.

be careful with your needle, and keep it clean. also, pay attention to the tracking weight of your cartridge and the antiskate on your tonearm. sometimes a skip on your record is actually because of something wrong here.

the plural of vinyl (the material) is vinyl but the plural of vinyl (as in short for vinyl records) is vinyls because its an abbreviation of a singular phrase. old white dudes are wrong in service of being condescending. this is not new. say it how you want. language and the people who try to police it are both tools.

buy whatever records make you happy and not what you think you should buy.

[fayeimara]

Meant To Be Series || One For Every Billion

Episode 3. Angel's Blessing | Pt 1

Your weeks in Miyagi flew by so fast, you're a little sad that you'll shortly be heading to stay with your aunt and uncle in Tokyo soon. It didn't feel like you'd spent nearly enough time with Toshi. You'd also had only a couple days to visit Tobio and Miwa, your cousins from your mom's side that also lived in Miyagi, but you didn't realize it wouldn't be nearly enough time. You'd had to promise him, Miwa, and their parents that you would stay with them the next time you visited.

You had a little over a week left here and Toshi and the guys from Shiratorizawa had just started their summer break so it was the perfect excuse to make the most of your time left while taking them out to celebrate. You'd gotten to know them well during your stay, with constant drop ins to their practices - You could swear even Coach Washijo had warmed up to you! ...or maybe just gotten used to tolerating your presence.

You'd also spent a lot of time chilling with the guys on their time off but that was usually chilling indoors playing video games at one of their places or stopping by cute little shops. Toshi, Tendou, and Semi had even come shopping with you a couple times which was a hilarious circus in itself but you repaid the laughs you got by torturing them and buying them gifts. Although you didn't realize it wasn't quite regular at first but they got used to it... well, at the very least Semi stopped getting flustered and just let you have your way.

It's not like you couldn't afford it and when you said that to his face, he literally just rolled his eyes and said something about rich kids which you threw back in his face because... hypocritical! At least you had your own hard-earned money, but you just refused to tell him how and why it was still so much and you think he was kind of concerned now.

Regardless, you'd be leaving soon and you really wanted a special night to commemorate this trip and your new friendships so you told the guys that you all were having a nice dinner somewhere, your treat. They protested that at first but you stood firm and finally they picked the nice sushi restaurant you were headed to for dinner tonight.

Hence, you out here in a chic semi-formal outfit, which is basically a cute dress and flats with a couple layered necklaces and matching bracelets on each wrist.

"Y/n!" You're standing with Toshi and Tendou, already outside the restaurant when you hear your name. Looking over, you see Semi, Yamagata and Soekawa walk up to the three of you.

"Thank you so much for offering to treat us tonight!" Soekawa says as they reach you.

Semi's scowling like usual but he sounds relaxed when he adds, "Yeah, although it really should be us treating you."

You laugh and shake your head, "No way! I'm just so glad to have made great friends like you guys here, how can I not want to celebrate our friendship before I leave?"

"I wish you could stay." Yamagata's looking down both literally and figuratively, "You could come to Shiratorizawa and we could chill all the time like we have been."

"Aw, you'll still have me!" Tendou exclaims with his arms up in the air. He's moving towards Yamagata, who dodges before he replies.

"We see you every day! It's not the same, she's actually nice and doesn't always poke fun at us for every little thing!"

You giggle at them because their dynamic is great, yeah, but what you think he really means without saying it is that all these boys need is some platonic estrogen in their lives.

Tendou narrows his eyes at you when he hears though and you think he knows you well enough to know you're amused at their expense so you're ready for his move.

"Hmm..." He pretends to think, "Maybe if we kidnap her, she'd miss her train to Tokyo and have to stay here longer!"

Before he even finishes his sentence, he's running at you and you're embarrassed to say you shriek in surprise before spinning to run away, calling over your shoulder, "It doesn't work that way! I'd just get on a train the next day!"

Too bad you're not watching where you're going because you run right into a wall in your path. Just a metaphor this time because this wall stumbles back with a soft 'oof-' as its arms reach out to wrap around and steady you while you fall over together.

Oh my god, you just ran into, and took down, chocolate boy- you mean chocolate eyes. Wait, no- "Oikawa!" His name slips from your lips in disbelief as you look up at his face and then your face turns to what you're betting is a very embarrassed shade of red - and for too many different reasons, oh god.

He's a little stunning stunned but you think that's from the fall so you can't fault him when he responds, "Angel?"

Tendou's standing right by the two of you and you swear this boy really doesn't know how not to tease in an already pretty embarrassing situation because he just has to say, "So.. Y/n. Getting up off of our rival anytime soon?"

"I'm so sorry!" You blurt out again as you carefully try to move off him without using him as leverage since, you know, he just took the brunt of a fall that was your fault for the both of you. You also don't want to embarrass yourself any further by accidentally placing your hands anywhere intimate inappropriate.

His arms only release slightly and he's already sitting up while you're kind of maneuvering your limbs to find purchase on the ground around and in between him so you end up basically straddling his leg and your faces too close for comfort in that split second before you stand back up. And you never want to think of this again. Like if there was ever a time for a hole to open up and swallow anyone into oblivion it would be now and that person should be you.

He's way nicer than you would have expected from a pretty boy though because he just laughs brightly as he stands too, "No need to apologize! I think we reversed and I was just the one in the way this time."

"No, this one wasn't you at all. I'm really sorry, Oikawa."

Another voice chimes in, quite seriously, "Dropped the honorific already, Y/n? And that's the second time in minutes.. I wasn't aware you met more than that one time."

Even Semi is teasing you?! He almost got you for a second, his voice was perfectly serious, you only realized because you noticed the glint in his eyes when you looked over to make excuses. So instead you.. still make an excuse.

"I didn't grow up with this? It's pretty normal to use someone's name without honorifics back home!"

"Hmm." He looks like he'll drop it, but oh my gosh, Yamagata picks up the let's make fun of Y/n game by throwing back, "I don't know Y/n, you've had no trouble fitting in like a local for weeks. Seems suspect."

You look to Toshi for support but he's silent and just calmly looking back at you.

What. Is. This.

Even Iwa and the other friend behind Oikawa are various degrees of amused. Like. What?

You can't look at him, but you'll make it worse if you don't so you literally use all your remaining dignity to turn your probably flushed face back to Oikawa and all your control to keep a serious, sincere expression before trying to apologize again.

"Please ignore them, they were just telling me how nice I am since I don't tease them when they're down but apparently not enough to return the favour. Anyways, I hope you can accept my apology." No way are you saying his name again, because whether you use the honorific or not now, either option will just get you teased more.

You finally manage to look into his eyes again and that's when you realize that you're not the only one that's incredibly flustered. Like, he is too? Did he hit his head when the two of you fell? And.. has he just been staring at you this whole time?? Oh god, you're wearing a dress! Are you somehow flashing yourself?? The guys would tell you right? You quickly run your hands down the flared skirt to check without looking and making your consternation obvious, but no, everything seems in place.

He clears his throat, catching your attention again, and then there's a smile on his face, maybe more like a smirk, "That's okay, really... Now we can make it up twice."

Suddenly, your embarrassment is forgotten and you're smiling back. How can you not? You had said that back then because, what were the chances, really? So you definitely hadn't expected that cute moment with a cute boy to mean anything and yet here you are.

"Okay, yeah, sure." You lightly laugh out your words, because you're a little unsure about your coming offer but you're still about to go for it. "I'm treating these guys tonight so, if you and your friends would like to, you're welcome join us. If you think that might be enough to make up for running you over this time."

He's a little taken aback and shaking his head, "I can't let you treat me."

"Why?"

He blinks like he doesn't understand, "We both have to make it up to each other anyways, right? So that wouldn't make sense-"

"But we'll join you." His friend Iwa cuts him off as he steps forward, "We're celebrating his birthday tonight anyways and it'll be nice to have some buffers for his stupid."

Aw, his pout from last time is back and he's actually whining, "Iwaa, you're so mean to mee. And on my birthday?"

"Ohh goodie, this will be fun!" Tendou is literally the heart eyes emoji now but you think it's from the thought of all the fun he'll have torturing so many different people tonight.

"Yes. We have a table booked because we were unsure how busy it would be." Toshi adds, "I will inquire as to increasing our reservation."

It seems Oikawa's realized that he's going to be having dinner with his enemy and honestly looks a little sour about it but then you catch his eye again and he sees the smirk on your face. He tilts his head as he studies you because maybe he's only just realizing you're not such an 'angel'. No, you're definitely more a devil, it's probably why you and Tendou get along so great.

Either way, it looks like he's made his choice because he gestures for everyone to head into the restaurant after Toshi and now there's nine of you instead of the original six.

As you wait, you're properly introduced to Iwa - who is actually Iwaizume - Hanamaki, and finally Oikawa, before you introduce yourself. The first two call you by last name, but Oikawa calls you Y/n-chan or even just Y/n and you let it go because who are you to insist on proper etiquette when you're not even from here? Yeah, right, that's your story.

You end up sitting next to him and you think that was definitely manipulated by at least his friends if not also Tendou, who's managed to snag a front row seat right across the two of you.

It's definitely lively with this group and once everyone places their orders, it only gets louder as they all start talking and joking around with each other. For rival schools, they're making a surprising effort to get along, minus Tendou, but you think everyone has mutually decided to ignore his jibes.

"So..." You look over to your right at Oikawa with a bright smile to match his, "I didn't get to say it yet but.. Happy Birthday!"

"Aw thank you Faye-chan! I'm pretty lucky to have an angel wish me.. I have a feeling I'll be blessed for this year - if not the rest of my life!"

Ack, why are you blushing again? Is he genuine, flirty, or right on that line in between that you usually manage?

Probably the last, since you can't tell and you're the master at it. Okay then, fine. Let's play, pretty boy.

"Hm, I guess you didn't know that an angel can only pass blessings through tears or kisses.. if you want a blessed year, you'd have to make your angel cry... or fall in love." You inform him casually, holding eye contact the entire time so you don't miss the widening of his eyes, the colour on his cheeks, and that completely taken aback expression that slides on his face. Yeah, you went there. You have no filter when you're being impulsive but it's not like anyone else is listening either so you can be a little risky.

With a smirk, you finish, "Not just anyone can receive an angel's blessing after all. You'd have to be one of the luckiest guys in the world."

Something slightly shifts across his expression, like he reached a thought or decision you can't read, before he composes it to a conciliatory smile, "Well, then I'll just have to do my best to make sure I don't make sure I don't make you cry."

You get a warm, fuzzy feeling even though you left that opening for him, because that's a pretty sweet implication to make. You know you're both playing, but you can't help but wish he actually was going to try and make you fall in love.

Your wrists tingle at that thought, like an ever present reminder that fate in love is chosen for anyone who decides to follow that path. You refuse to get sad and melancholy, you've known the multiple markings on your wrist have decided your supposedly perfect matches since the moment you was born.

Unlike others in the world, who either choose to completely follow that path and dedicate themselves to the names etched on their skin or even those that completely oppose the idea of that kind of pre-destined love and shy away from it, you decided long ago that you would be neutral and give your soulmates a chance when you found them. So, you're not exactly available to just anyone, but you're not closed off to options, especially given that you're a little on the rarer side given the number of names currently hidden on your skin.

You don't realize you're adjusting the bracelets on your wrist until you notice him watching with a curious look on his face. What are the odds this cute boy you ran into has six currently indecipherable markings on his own skin? He hasn't rolled the sleeves of his shirt up this whole time so you haven't been able to check, if you would have even bothered to before, but by now you have a small, little percent of you that wants to know. It's just considered pretty bold and forward to ask or really keep trying to catch a glimpse of others' marks and even you're not that shameless. Maybe he's among the people that decided to completely ignore his marks?

Okay, now you're a little sad, but it's supposed to be a good night. You can hear the chatter of my and his friends around the two of you, but it feels like, for a moment of mutual quiet between you both, you're in your own little world together, with just each other and your shared thoughts. Or maybe you're just projecting.

You're glad when Iwaizumi distracts him from his other side because you dropped into this rabbit hole in your head so fast, that you're sure you got all weird and quiet and pretty obvious. You look up and see Tendou staring at you with a raised eyebrow and a pretty rare serious look on his face. Aw, he's checking to make sure you're okay. You really hope he didn't hear your conversation, though, because he's been one of your sounding boards on this matter way too much so he needs a break and you just don't want to talk about it.

Thankfully, the food arrives and your mood is back up as you all enjoy the delicious appetizers and variety of sushi that's been prepared for your table. You make Oikawa try a spicy dynamite roll when he admits he hasn't before and Tendou and Semi both keep stealing your gyoza before you can slap their hands away.

You're full well before any of the guys at the table when the topic of your trip comes up.

"Y/n-chan, what did you mean when you said you're not from here earlier?" Oikawa looks over to ask before dipping his last roll into some soy sauce and popping it into his mouth.

"Oh, I'm actually visiting Japan for my summer vacation. I spend my school year in America."

Maki pipes up from across Iwaizumi, "That's a pretty specific way you worded that. You live there?"

You smile happily knowing that he's caught on fast, you're a big fan of how words are used for communication, "I mean, I've spent so much time in different countries with friends and family and am usually travelling when not in school that I actually did mean that how I said it. Technically, I've been living here the past month, haven't I? And the next month, I'll still be living in Japan, only to return home when school's about to start."

"You'll be in Japan, but not Miyagi?" Iwaizumi is holding his green tea, his head tilted like he's trying to read between the lines now that he's realized you mean more than what you typically say.

"Yeah," You fiddle with your chopsticks, lining them up perfectly before looking around the table with a sad smile, "I'm off to stay in Tokyo instead, next week. I'll miss it here, but I'm also looking forward to my next adventures and new friends." You say the last with a smirk aimed at the Shiratowizawa guys who either smirk, whine, or roll their eyes (I see you, Semi) in response. Toshi seems completely unaffected but you know he'll miss you so you're not offended.

"So that's what you were yelling about taking a train before you ran into me." Oikawa states with a smirk while your face gets hot remembering that awkward encounter outside. Didn't you decide you never wanted to think of it again?

"Weren't you the one 'in my way'?" You throw back quickly but he's already shaking his head.

"No, pretty sure you made it clear that one was on you and only you, and who am I to argue with an angel?"

"Oi, shittykawa, stop trying to embarrass her, you're acting like trash." Wow, can you take Iwaizumi everywhere with you? Knight, shining armour.

"Iwa-chan! I think you've already forgotten what day it is again!"

"Yeah, it's the day you're supposed to grow up."

They're going to start bickering again so you think Soekawa is diffusing the tension when he return everyone to the original topic, "It's almost like you grew up here, though, I wouldn't be able to tell you're just visiting since you fit right in."

"Even when you claim not to be familiar with common customs!" Yeah, thanks Yamagata, I'm going to ignore that.

"Well I have a lot of family in Japan. Toshi, of course, and a few other cousins, aunts and uncles in different regions. So I guess it's like a second home for me where I've spent the majority of my breaks when I'm not travelling anywhere else." Soekawa already knew that, as did the rest of the Shiratorizawa guys, so you're just following his lead to keep the peace and share a little more for the others at this point.

"So you come back a lot?" Why is Oikawa asking? You don't want to read too much into it.

"Sure, if I don't have any other obligations, then yeah, I love spending time here."

"Why not just move? You could live here and come to Seijoh!" Aw, Maki's the sweet one in their group.

"If she were to live here, she already knows she should come to Shiratorizawa." Guess who?

Oikawa's reply follows so quick after Toshi's statement, like he just knew where it was going, "Yeah, no. She'd definitely like Aoba Johsai much more."

Ugh, you should have expected this too. The table erupts into a slightly heated debate but you can't fault this rivalry, it gets even worse between the academies back home so this is really oddly polite and low-key in comparison.

You excuse yourself and leave them at it to go wash your hands before dessert arrives and surprise, surprise, who do you bump into on your way back out to the dining room but pretty boy himself. Definitely curious if he was waiting for you for some reason or it's just a coincidence because, you know, people are allowed to use the restrooms when they need to.

"You know, Angel, you promised to make it up to me for running into me earlier."

"I thought we were supposed to make it up to each other?"

"Well.. then, how about we choose what we want from each other to fulfill our promise?"

You hesitate because it seems like he already has something in mind, but you don't think he would ask for anything you wouldn't be okay with. You're caught in his gaze as you take way less time than you probably should to consider his proposition before agreeing, "Well, it is your birthday, I guess. So tell me, how can I make it up to you?"

His smile becomes positively wicked, if you could call it that on a cute teenage boy, "Since I'm hoping for an incredible year and I got it wrong the first time, I'd like to ask for an angel's blessing."

You choose your words carefully, because, is he asking for what you think he is!?

"I don't suppose you want to make me cry?"

He chuckles and it's just a divine sound that rolls right through you, holding you still in this mesmerizing moment, "I'm sure I already said I don't ever want to make my pretty angel cry."

"I'm not your anything, Oikawa."

"Call me Toru, Y/n-chan. You're at least my friend, aren't you?"

You swear he's just stealing your smiles and blushes, because you can't stop the amused pull of your lips and light, warm flush at his playful tone. "I don't know, Oikawa, I don't think friends ask for kisses in return for... small mishaps."

"Well, I think we're friends," he pouts before settling back into an almost serious expression with a confident, sincere smile on his face, "but I'd really like to know what it's like to be the luckiest guy in the world."

"Hmm." You pretend to think it over but you already know your decision because you're so ridiculously charmed by this guy, "Well.. I suppose if it's a birthday wish..."

And before you can overthink it, you cross the step of space between you two, lean up with your hands resting on his chest for balance, and close your eyes before softly gifting him a small kiss on his cheek, right by the corner of his mouth. You must be as reckless as your friends say but you can't help but love the electric feeling that comes with the adrenaline of making bold and risky choices.

You want to look away so badly but you're also stubborn so you force yourself to keep meeting his eyes as you drop back down from your tip toes and pull away slightly. He'd immediately reached for your waist when you stretched up to reach him, as if to help steady you, but you're realizing now that was like some conditioned automatic reaction because he's actually looking frozen in shock and a little disbelief now that you're studying him.

Is he surprised that you actually gave him a kiss in some way, when he asked for it? Wow, you hope he wasn't completely joking around.. you hadn't thought you were reading that wrong. Oops?

His eyes are slightly wide again and mouth a little open like he was about to say something at whatever point he froze- why does he look so cute like this?? What a face he's making.. You smile at him and repeat your wish to him, "Happy birthday.. Toru."

He blinks like he's coming out of a trance, arms gradually dropping back to his sides, and this time, his smile is slow to spread but so sweet and happy. You think for a moment again about the marks on your wrist and wonder.. no. What are the odds?

"Angel, you... I'm really already the luckiest guy, aren't I?" Oh my gosh, why does that make you blush? He sounds incredibly genuine, maybe that's why.

"I guess, as your friend, I'll have to agree." It was supposed to come out sounding playful and careless, but there's a certain tension as you're kind of looking at each other for a moment before you feel the need to get some space from this.. weirdly intimate scene. You start to step backwards, with a friendly smile back on your face, "I'll see you back at-"

"That was my birthday present, right?"

You stop moving and tilt your head in confusion, "...yes?"

He smirks, "So what about 'making it up' once, let alone twice?"

You're pretty sure disbelief is sliding across your face now, "Seriously? I don't just go around giving birthday kisses, what more could you want?"

His laughter is warm and ripples in the space around you, "Don't look so suspicious, angel! The kiss was a birthday gift, we both agreed. But to make it up for running into me earlier, I just think exchanging our socials should be more than enough. We're friends anyways, right?"

"Oh." Okay, now you're a little embarrassed. You guess that's not really a sacrifice and it would be nice to keep in touch with him when you leave. It makes you sad to think you'd never run into or get to talk to this sweet chocolate boy again. "Okay, sure. But here's the thing, Oikawa. That's your request, not mine, so you still have to make it up to me for running into me that first time." You hold your hand up, briefly uncurling your first finger to make your point, before dropping it and tilting your head at him with what you hope is an innocent smile on your face.

He doesn't look thrown off at your challenging retort, so you're pretty sure he's got a feel for your unpredictable nature at this point. Oh well, you're sure you can still keep surprising him if you continue your friendship.

"Feel free to let me know what you want whenever you're ready then, but don't wait too long, Angel. It would break my heart to think I didn't pay off my debt to you."

You laugh off his lighthearted words with your own, "What a heavy word for our deal! Aren't devils the ones that hold debts over you? Pretty sure angels wouldn't ever do something so unkind."

He raises an eyebrow at your playful statement before remarking, "Are you trying to warn me? Pretty sure devils make deals, too, the debt just comes after. Sounds familiar, now that I think about it."

Your mouth drops at his teasing, even though you once again left him that opening, but before you can respond, Tendou finds you both, "Are you guys hiding out here from the rest of us? Sneaking some alone time, hm?"

You roll your eyes, because at this point, there's a lot worse moments he could have walked into that he'd never let you live down so, you're just thanking your own blessings. Toru's actually the one that snarks back something about getting away from him because he's annoying, as you all head back to the table together. That's when you also realize that he didn't head to the men's room so.. he'd been waiting for a moment alone with you.

Was it just about the birthday kiss and both of your 'debts'? Or was there something more left unsaid between you both?

You settle that thought away for later while the two of you quickly exchange your contacts before dessert arrives. Toru offers you his mochi in exchange for trying some of your coffee jelly and you almost give him a bite of your own spoon before you see the blush on his face. See, you do forget some things are still considered more intimate here in Japan than in North America.

He's still about to go for it, leaning towards you and opening his mouth for a bite, when you withdraw your spoon with an embarrassed laugh because, hey, his friends are watching pretty closely. Although, Toshi, Tendou, and even the other Shiratorizawa guys must be pretty used to you slipping on these things around them because it hasn't caught their attention.

You take that bite yourself, savouring the flavour and texture, while grabbing a spare spoon and handing it to him with a look out of the corner of your eyes. He accepts it with the slightest pout, actually looking a little disappointed, but then ends up digging in and finishing the rest of your dessert. He's ignoring your protests, grabbing the cup and turning so he's blocking you as you try to reach around him so you retaliate by taking away the rest of his dessert, which is pretty good too.

You find a moment while the guys are distracted and finishing up to quickly stand and find a staff member in order to cover the dinner before anyone else can do anything about it. When you return, Toshi and Tendou are looking at you, Toshi with a resigned look on his face and Tendou smirking at you. Yes, you're stubborn - these boys know it, some of the others are learning it, and the Seijoh guys will be getting their first taste of it. Pun intended, you guess.

You all stay a little longer before Toshi decides it's time to be heading back so you, him, and Tendou stand while the rest of the guys look at you three like you're missing something.

Iwaizumi's the one to speak up, kind of like he's not sure if you're oblivious, up to something, or that he's missing something, "Uh.. we need to pay the bill."

"Wait, are you serious?" And cue the realization for Semi, but then, he's also spent the most time with you apart from your cousin and bestie here, "Y/n?"

You just smile at him, not wanting to actually upset anyone, while Tendou responds, "I don't know why you look so surprised, Semi-Semi."

The others guys are starting to catch on and protest but it's Toshi who cuts them off, "If it pleases her to have taken care of the bill for us, than we should not disrespect her wishes. Do not throw her gift back in her face or feel indebted, I can guarantee it's no trouble to her and it makes her happy."

"Thanks Toshi!" You hug his arm while looking at the guys, "He's right, I never really agreed with anything when we first discussed it and this was my intention the whole time. I hope you guys enjoyed it and don't let it bother you, because I, for one, am just happy to have had this time tonight with all my new friends."

You swear, even Iwaizumi blushes and Maki actually hugs you. Toru's giving you a narrow-eyed look but he does have a smile on his face so you know he's letting it pass. If you're going to be friends, he'll have to realize that you're not one to stand on formalities or politeness. You do think things through and observe etiquette when necessary but, mostly, you do what you want to when you want to, especially if it means making the people you care about happy.

When you exit into the warm, summer night, you all start to head the same way. Most of the guys have grouped off with Soekawa and Yamagata walking furthest ahead, far enough that you can barely hear their voices, let alone their conversation. Just behind them are Toshi, Tendou, and Semi close enough that you can heard the lilt of their conversation but can't quite catch the words they're saying. Somehow, you and Toru have gravitated together and you think it's done purposefully again, because Iwaizumi and Maki are trailing slowly behind the two of you as if to give a little space too.

Toru is complaining about something Iwaizumi said but it seems like a pretty standard occurrence, their antagonist friendship, so you're just listening to the sound of his voice and appreciating the moment in time. You don't know when, or even if ever, you'll find this sort of relaxed comfort with someone you only barely know. You guess that's why you miss it when he grows a little quiet before asking, "So what's your life like when you're living your school year in America?"

You look up at the sky, thinking over all the thing you might say, and you settle on, "Busy, I guess."

"Hm. Me too, but that's typical, right?"

"Is it? What keeps you so busy?" You're looking over at him now so you see the smile slip on his face while it seems like now he's the one looking at something in the distance.

"I mean, other than school, I'm the setter for Aoba Johsai's volleyball club."

You laugh out loud but explain when he looks a little offended, "No, sorry, it's just, I already knew that!"

"Oh? Keeping tabs on me?"

"No, silly." You reach out to smack his arm and he grabs it like you've hurt him, pouting yet again. "I mean, aren't you and Toshi rivals? Like, everyone here plays volleyball, right?"

"Except for you?" He sounds almost certain, with just the slightest question in his voice when he throws that out there so you smirk, interested to see his reaction.

"I'm the setter, you know. Toshi apparently said once that I could teach you a few things." He whips around to look at you and you can see he's torn between several emotions - definitely curiosity and competitiveness among them.

"You were talking about me?"

"Semi mentioned it to me, I don't know if Toshi has actually ever complimented me on my skills to my face." You laugh a little, thinking about your cousin's quiet, serious, and direct nature. "Wait, no. He definitely has, but I think we were in single digits then. He hasn't seen me play in person for a long time."

"Hm. Well, he does have a good eye for talent."

"Right, like I don't know how much he bugs you about joining his team." You tease lightly, tilting your head so you can look sideways up at him, "Haven't you heard? You should have gone to Shiratorizawa."

He rolls his eyes, matching your tilt with his own to look sideways and down at you, "Don't you start too or we're not friends anymore."

"Aw." You copy his signature pout, "Toru-chaaan, you're so meeaan!"

He's shaking his head in complete disbelief at your silliness but you've got him smiling wide - and slightly blushing - too so you consider it a win.

"We're going to be a really strong team. I wish you could come see me play." There's a pause and you think he's finished but he adds, "You know, when we beat your cousin and his team."

"Hm." You don't agree or disagree, choosing instead to divert, "Or you could see me play and I could teach you that thing or two."

"I wonder." He actually sounds thoughtful and you're kind of glad because it means he's not as conceited as he sometimes acts. You wonder why?

It's almost time to move on, and you're anticipating your goodbye already, "You know, I'm glad we ran into each other."

He looks surprised that you would say that and thrown off because it's not flirty or teasing. You're genuine and sincere in your statement and you're sure that comes across.

"Really?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I be? You're a good person to be around, Oikawa. I can tell that from just a couple run ins and a couple hours. I'm happy to call you my friend."

The look he sends you is as undeniably warm, tender, and sweet as it is slightly apprehensive and thoughtful. You don't know why he seems to question his value or worth in some way, but you can tell he appreciates your words, however he decides to accept them.

"I'm glad to have run into you too." It's said softly before he seems to switch back into his confident smirk, "I'm really glad to have received a blessing from a pretty angel like you too."

You're not going to blush, nope. No. You can feel your face heat up so you throw out a random statement to cover your fluster, "Aren't all angels pretty, anyways?"

"You're extra special." He smiles and then adds, "You look especially pretty tonight."

"Uh.. thanks. I mean, it was a celebratory dinner one way or another."

He's still studying you, particularly the bracelets that cover your wrists, so you're not exactly surprised when he reaches out a little, to lift your arm. You don't notice you've stopped and are facing each other at this point because he's asking, "Do you always wear these?"

You study them when you don't need to, for once avoiding that inner urge for strength to look up, face your fears, and see what might lie in his expression. "No. Obviously I can't when I play."

"The rest of the time?"

"Not really. Not these specific ones a lot, either, but other bracelets or sleeves or gloves, sure - it's probably like fifty-fifty." You don't know why you're even telling him this but his expression is a little apprehensive, a little hopeful, so maybe you want to see where this goes.

"Why?"

You look up at him then, at an unusual loss for words and not knowing if he understands what it's like. He must know, of course, like every child in this world learns growing up, how diversely fractured the beliefs in this concept is. You're sure he's aware of the people that completely support the soulmate system and push others to believe in it just as faithfully. He must also know about the other side of the scale, people that literally hate the concept to the point of forcing their disbelief, mistrust, and active rebellion onto others. That's all common knowledge quite well understood around your world and anyone can fall anywhere on the scale, like with politics or religion.

But does he understand how it feels, even in a world where almost every person has at least one name on their skin, to have six? To either be an object of awe, or envy, or disgust. To be you, in that position, an overthinking, overachieving daughter of an almost empirical family, and to have to account for how the marks you were born with might be received in the various environments you're in. You haven't even been able to use your real last name for years thanks to your last deal with your grandmother.

You don't know what his mark is, if he has more than one, you don't even know what he thinks of any of it and where he falls on that scale. And you're supposed to explain why?

He's still looking at you, waiting for something. You don't know if any of your thoughts have hit your expression because you're so conflicted and a little scared. But you're also oddly curious too, like a little part of you is hoping that out of the 7.6 billion people in the world, you just happened to run into and click immediately with one of your six actual soulmates. Seriously, what are the odds? 1 in every 1.2 billion, you guess.

It's like he can see you're retreating, even though you feel like you haven't even moved to take a breath, and he asks, "Can I?"

It's like your heart stops. Why? Why? But you're biting your lip and nodding, like in some kind of trance-like moment. You don't move to help him figure out the clasp and he's just about to snap it open-

"Oi!" You look over and see all the guys stopped a little bit further down from the two of you, where they're clearly going separate ways. When did Iwaizumi and Maki even pass you both??

You burn with embarrassment and concern at how completely unaware you were while talking to Toru. Has it only been a minute or two since you stopped walking? It felt like eternity and a single moment all at the same time.

When you look at his face, he has an equally complicated mix of emotions on his face, that same embarrassment and shock, but also frustration and.. what looks a little bit like a question, if you both can stay here and see this moment to its end. What end would that be?

"Yo! Stop flirting, it's getting late!"

Without looking over at the others again, the both of you pull apart and, metaphorically, pull yourselves together before breaking eye contact and turning to walk the rest of the way.

"You know," You've almost reached the group and you don't expect Toru to talk so you're a little startled when he cuts into the silence but, "I'm really excited to meet mine."

You look over at him at him again, grateful he's diffused the tension so beautifully, even though you're left with what feels like hundreds of questions. You push it all away to bring back some of that easy comfort you were enjoying and answer him with a bright, sincere smile, "Me too. I always have been."

You hope that conveys something to him or explains it a little. You've never been ashamed of the marks on your skin. You're not enamoured with them either. You're simply open to what the possibilities could be and happy to accept whatever makes you and the people you care for happy.

You don't bother questioning the odds or worrying about all the pressing thoughts you've chosen to tuck away for the rest of the night, even after you say your goodbyes and part ways. One way or another, at least some of your questions will be answered. Because in a little over two years from now, if you're the youngest of all your soulmates, the designs that so prettily cover the six currently unreadable names between both of your wrists will change as if they've melted away. A little over two years from now, on your 16th birthday, the names of your soulmates that have been etched into your skin from birth, will finally reveal themselves.

And from your perspective, what you do then won't be any different from how you operate now. Because your future and your fate will always be your choice.

-x-x-x-

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Masterlist

Behind The Scenes!

-Y/n is pretty solid on where she stands regarding soulmates, including hers specifically - She wants to give them a chance, which means no serious commitments or relationships until she's learned who they are and met them; if any of all of them want nothing to do with her, she's decided she'll move on and explore new possibilities with a higher degree of commitment at the time

-She's aware things don't go as planned or imagined.. you might call her realistically optimistic.. she's also well aware through personal experience that what you think you want to do might not line up with how you feel about people since, you know, you can't control the feeling, heart wants what the heart wants, etc, etc :')

-And, like any teenager that is constantly undergoing different experiences, particularly one with a tendency to overthink many things, she also suffers moments of doubt and questions if her philosophy should change - for her, there's no perfect answer, just the best she can do or choose

-Essentially, she has a flexible mindset in that, while she has her opinions which she stands for pretty steadily, if new information does manage to sway those opinions, she's always willing to adapt and learn, consequently updating those opinions and beliefs with new information

-Oikawa... isn't playing around. Actually, he loves to play around, lol, but he's definitely interested in Y/n. He also definitely questioned their odd instant attraction to each other but he's not going to push or make anyone actually feel uncomfortable, especially with a ridiculously high chance of being wrong

-He wasn't lying when he said he's excited to meet (and know) his soulmate, but he's also still just a kid and he currently already loves something real/tangible with all his being so he's okay to wait for something that's supposedly meant to be

A/N: Hi friends! I felt like the written part of this chapter was really long so I'm posting the SMAU part on a different post tomorrow morning. It'll also give me time to make sure everything is in line since I have a lot more trouble with putting those together, as previously mentioned. As always, feel free to send me a message if you noticed any mistakes or even just have anything you want to say about the story so far. I'd love to hear from you! <3

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