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lordoftablecloths · 11 months

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vent post i guess i dont know i just wanted to write stuff down instead of just go ing to bed and crying over it you can just scroll past it

im fine im sane im noramal im so unbleiveably cringe ,, the only person i have irl- fuck, or even online for that matter- to show the dumbass things i write is my silly little dumbass younger brother who doesn;t understand what im trying to get at and i guess its not his fault, i seriously doubt he's spent unhealthy amounts of time making various short scenerios in his head about charcters he came up with and eventually trying to give them a story and write little things about them in google docs because where else am i supposed to put this and its just ,, he doesnt know wht im trying to do and i dont know how to explain it to him because the "history" i gess behind it is so fucking complicated by now that these characters arent even the same characters as they were when i originally created them, other than some physical attributes and their names and he just knows them as the random cringe shit i made up in middle school but so many years have passed by now that these stupid fuckers whose only purpose to serve is to make me stop remembering that i exist and ive gotten too attatched to them because who else was i supposed to get attatched to when i was going through an identity crisis at the time- and, quite frankly, still fucking am- and it was so much easier to pretend i dont exist and just project my flaws and insecurities and underlying subconcsious thoughts into these charactes that no one knows about except me and oh god im just created a long ass vent post on tumblr that no one's going to read and no one understands the story behind fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck whatever ill go ahead and post this unfinished thing because no one's going to get it either way ill probably delete it later if it doesnt get buried under reblogs

dont think too much about this i just got sad because my brother was giving me a bunch of criticism on an outline of a story i was working on- which is fair, i need to take criticism- but he only knows the characters in it as their semi-formed cringe versions so i chickened out half way and now i feel bad because i was really proud of this thing for the whopping span of like one day before i decided to show it to another human person instead of letting it rot away inside of me like i usually do and now i feel bad about my writing skills

im trying so hard to just take his words with a grain of salt because this kid does not have nearly as much experience with writing as i do, but i feel like im copying too many of my inspirations (DnD, generic fantasy story about defeating evil creature, silly tropes, etc,,) which sucks because that was just like the first two pages of the outline and theres nine fucking pages and like the second half of it was what i put the most effort into and i felt like the ideas were really origianl but i could make myself let him naturally get to that part of the outline because i was starting to feel really bad and wieerd and oh god he is looking at ideas i havent ever expressed to another human person even though i am very familaiar with because i came up with them and they havebeen in my head for at least a year or two by now and have been haunting me ever since so instead of skipping ahead to the parts that were really good in my opinion but would have made no sense without context i just told him to piss off i gues s

i dont know. i feel dumb. i feel stupid. ive put so much effort into this stuff and the concept that ive been wasting my time feels like too heavy of a weight to handle. god none of this porbobably nmakes any sense ,,,,,,,,, i guess this is why i feel miserable when the fanart and shitpost memes i post get a comically larger audience and attention than the art relating to my silly goofy ocs, because these stupid fucking characters are all thats keeping me going . call me cringe, but is it still cringe if the concept that maybe i too can be around people that love me and instead of having to like me in spite of my faults love me for them keeps me from fucking killing myself is it still cringe?

if a tree falls in a forest and no one's around, does its fall even make a sound? (shit piss fuck sorry i dont remember the original quote and all i can remember is tha t one line from that one musical i dont remember what it was)

if an autistic moron that cant even talk to a cashier without having a panic attack makes a universe full of fictional characters of his own cfreation then an alternate universe, then several alternate universes, then a spin off from that original universe and etc etc but its all just on google fucking docs and no where else except deleted excerpts from a dead wattpad account, did he ever even create anything at all?

its pointless. its all so fucking pointless. its a waste of time. why do i do this at all. its so fucking pointless. it makes no fucking sense. you cant just make a story with characters in it, then make a fucking fantasy au of that universe with the same characters but with different designs and wildly different personalities and then make a whole fucking complicated lore-filled story about the fantasy au version while the original universe's story is still left mostly unfinished like forget about a first draft of the text i havent even finished the first ddraft of the outline yet buckarooooooo

okay fuck you guys thats all i want to tell you im going to go pretend to myself to try to go to sleep and then cry now

#vent #i guess #sorry for saying fuck you guys yall are the only keeping me together and making me feel like i have any importance at all #long post

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google-is-alien · 1 year

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Screaming into the void rn incomprehensibly. I have been getting serious brain rot about the dichotomy between 2001 A Space Odyssey and Bloodborne rn. And I think I figured out why Space Odyssey falls flat for me while Bloodborne works. Basically, for these two different design/fine arts classes I had to dissect these two on their principles; one was an essay on 2001: A Space Odyssey and one was a presentation on Bloodborne. So now you all have to hear my thoughts even though I rarely post beyond reblogs.

SPOILERS AHEAD TREAD CAREFULLY:

The two are arguably of a similar genre of cosmic horror/Lovecraftian horror/eldritch horror whatever the fuck you want to call it. The issue with Space Odyssey is there is no true horror in knowing. That's it. The lack of plot makes you confused on why everyone is freaking out about those goddamn alien rectangles. The enlightenment of humanity, where Dave turns into the StarChild fetus, is not a horror revelation nor is it seen as a triumph of ascension. It just is? Like he sees a bunch of colors (which is just Kubrick on acid being like let's not cut this down) and then he sees himself rapidly age, which should begin to cohesively tie the plot and would like show this ascension into becoming alien/an Old one, but it doesn’t. It cuts to him being a fetus. Not to mention the evolution of humanity displayed in the film is so choppy as it cuts from the monkeys, to the moon people, to Dave in the Jupiter trip to ascension of humanity? Like many a time I have complained about the lack of plot for this movie or about how much of the runtime could be cut.

Bloodborne solves this problem and conveys its story in so much more of a compelling way. The plot is just as obscured as Space Odyssey, and it doesn’t even need to be uncovered for certain playthroughs. But even brutality in monster hunting gives you a specific ending and the lore of the world will still be conveyed by the NPCs around you. The ideas of the evolution of humanity are dealt with in a much more interesting way of analyzing and viscerally showing you the issues between A) sex and B) human experimentation forcing people to madness when trying to breach ascension. The sex part has been discussed in a wonderful video essay by Honey Bat on YouTube under Visceral Feminity: A Bloodborne Video Essay and also a recent post I reblogged by xenosagaepisodeone that discusses the use of sex as a tactic into cosmic horror. (Also brief note that Space Odyssey has scenes that make me personally uncomfy because haha late 60s sexism).

What I’m about to discuss is ascension and knowledge. Basically there is this very important part of Bloodborne where you discover that there are two like factions that are trying to get humanity to ascend into becoming one with the Old Gods: The Blood Ministry/The Healing Church (people trying to use the blood of trapped Old Gods and inject themselves with it, which turns them into blood drunk monsters) and the Byrgenwerth College (belief that humanity needs to elevate their minds by gaining Insight which basically some Watcher shit where they try to see into the eldritch truth via eyeballs). This can completely tie into the hubris of humanity that is prevalent in Lovecraft stories as those that seek this power are often damned to madness, which is seen in both heads of these factions. In fact, the true ending of the game is the protagonist ascending after using both methods in-game to survive.

So what does this mean for Space Odyssey? It means that the ascension of Dave has no basis nor a hubris. The only one who displays any hubris in the movie is HAL and perhaps the businessmen who decide to send people to the moon. Which makes sense if you understand the people losing it on the moon, but the ascension has no basis. There is no reason for Dave to ascend as the Hunter does in Bloodborne beyond being chosen by an outside alien force after they scouted humanity for millions of years. The madness of the rectangles is not eldritch knowledge as it is not about comprehension of an outside source. Bloodborne masters this perfectly with the two routes that Yharnam has taken and its explorations of this concept. It follows how Lovecraft applied arrogance in humans to drive them mad. It follows how these stories see incomprehensible things, ignores it, and then someone fucks it up for the rest of us. It explores how the ascension of humans is through the same knowledge that makes us insane. Dave and Space Odyssey doesn’t get that. And it might merely be the medium it is made in, as Bloodborne has the advantage of being an interactive medium, and it also could be because the point is that it is a fun space movie and technology sometimes bad movie made when the moon landing happened and that was terrifying for a lot of people. But I think its interesting how similar these two things are in a horror concept, and yet I despised Space Odyssey to the point of mental breakdown and now I’m relentlessly consuming Bloodborne content. Like theres gotta be reasons for this I feel like I’m going insane in the membrane myself.

I do also want to mention that I actually think both media are stunning design-wise. Kubrick is obviously a master at cinematic craft and certain scenes, such as when HAL is being turned off actually were really neat. And then Bloodborne is a macabre dream and fits my personal tastes beautifully. So there is nothing wrong artistically with these two properties. I just think that I had such strong reactions to them despite them being similar.

Anyways Eileen the Crow is hot and HAL 9000 can get it. Send post.

#brekker speaks #tumblr posts #bloodborne #2001 a space odyssey #worldbuilding #lore #eldritch

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soupyboiiiii · 1 year

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sideblog of @6leafclover I like and follow from there.

follow to watch me slowly become a bandom blog. the transformation is complete I literally just post about the killjoys now. and reblog pictures of Hayley Williams.

this was originally an lu roleplay account but now its just the alt i use to post everything that isnt zelda or carnivorous plants. I'm very normal about romeo and juliet and music I like**.

Call me Soup, Clover or whatever funny nicknames you can think of. all the pronouns. transmasc non-binary girlboy. I have a love/hate relationship with labels & pronouns and id love to give u a proper explanation of my gender+ sexuality. ask me! tbh my gender is whatever whatever link (and also gerard way) has going on.

If you wanna know what I look like irl go type Party Poison into google images.

quote under the blog name is lyrics from 26 by paramore, go listen to it it's a good song. I saw paramore live last year and i dont think i'll ever recover.

member of val velocity hate club, defected from my dinner to join the anti my dinner revolution

mod of @paramore-reference and also @mgmk-daily

@lime-spid3r and @xx-the-phoenix-witch-xx are my killjoy rp blogs

@clovers-carnivores if you're interested in looking at photos of my carnivorous plants.

welcome to the gay parade

**music I like: Paramore, Muse, MCR, idk a bunch of other random stuff, saviours by Green Day, blackbriar, hesitant alien, OK Computer, specific really old Coldplay EP's, the family jewels by Marina, destroy boys, hayley williams solo stuff, the Zelda sountrack. Ive recently becomes obssessed with 21 pilots, its all my friends fault for inviting me to go to the concert with him. Everything about my music taste and life in general can be explained by the fact that my dad is an art school goth and my mum is a theatre kid and im their daughter. When I was little my dad would play the venga bus followed by polly by nirvana, and then as a whole family we'd listen to the twilight soundtrack.

pfp is hayleywilliams.jpeg, i have a millipn print outs of this image that i give to people i meet.

#soup speaks

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stitchthesewords · 1 year

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SSSSTTTTTTTTIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTCCCHHHHHH

PORTAL AU

*grabs pencil

So, *still internally screaming, sogoood

Do Mumbo and ScaR have, wait... can it even be called skin?, but is their skin (?) Kinda like glados' in all thar fannart you reblogged or does it look like human skin, and (I'm sorry if these details were in the fic and I missed them) what color are scar and grians eyes

And like, how much taller are scar and mumbo compared to grian?

You and Chel are so talented and amazing, and and and and like, AAAAAAKSKDKFJSLAKDJBRKS

Your guy's writing is amazing

I just, I'm dying, it's its mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

AAAAAAA thank u!!! So - yeah, its like how a lot of people draw android glados and wheatley where they've got like metal paneling covering their bodies! Scar has one yellow eye and one. Uh. Whatever color scars eyes are normally in fanart am I going insane what color are scar's eyes. But the one yellow eye is like, inset in his own panel [as is often done with glados and wheatley fanart]. I should mention that we'll get to more description with him for the next ch but he's got artifical cracks and 'scars' in the paneling that makes up his skin along with real ones from falling without longfall boots. He asks mumbo to include them because they were a part of his old construct and he's 'gotta complete the look'. Grian's eyes are simply dark brown and hes got a lil manbun [all hail @made-nondescript grian w a manbun].

I imagine grian to be about 5'5[165.1 cm] and Scar to be 6'0[182.8 cm] while Mumbo is 6'2[188 cm]. Im pretty sure that's roughly their irl heights but also its just. Accurate to how they are as characters.

I'll take this time to point out that I'm writing the fic, Chel is drawing like. A bunch of art for it I hope all of it gets to see the light of day oh my god im chewing on it all, and we're both coming up with the ideas that eventually make it into the au one way pr another :D Even though Chel didn't write the fic i want her contributions to be seen in equal measure to mine. ESPECIALLY considering this all started as a bribe to get them to vote for Mumbo. Best bribe of my life frankly. We're floating down the river hand in hand.

#asks #mutuals #Halfapersob #PDiCTP #i love this au so so so much #chel and I both love the original portal so much and this is like #a love letter to the games #they really shaped me

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manthrochap-blog · 2 years

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well well well. look who finally figured out what email he used for his old blog....

so, hi. the last post on this blog was from december 2016, so... i’d expect most of my followers are inactive and the few people i follow who are still active probably unfollowed ages ago, unless they never cleared out their accounts... but i thought i’d make a little post here as a sort of update and finally offer a means of contact

so. i’m freshly 23 years old now (jesus CHRIST). i’m not using this blog anymore, so i won’t be updating my bio/about/whatever to reflect that, but i’ll note i exclusively use he/him now. while homestuck is still constantly in my periphery (more literal than that sentence should be, there’s a dave strider vinyl figure in a bin almost within eyesight of my desk chair...) i haven’t really engaged with it in... years... other than a recent look at its unfinished japanese translation, seeing as i started learning the language a few years ago and got curious. i still stan aradia hardcore, btw, nothing in life will Ever change that

as you can probably (hopefully) predict from the fact that i was 17 when i last used this blog (and 13-16 when i used it actively) and i am now 23, this blog, uh... would not be a great reference point for determining what kind of person i am now. i won’t write it off as completely detached from my present identity, and i’m not saying this because there’s some sort of “dirt” you could dig up from looking through my posts (there... really isn’t, just a whole lot of cringe), i’d just like to make it clear that judging the present me by whatever the hell was wrong with me when i was a teenager would leave you with a lot of inaccuracies about me. being a teenager sucks and you’ve got way more things wrong with you mentally than any other stage of your life and i’m happy to report many of those things wrong with me have resolved themselves with time, but also, the cringe. the cringe. my god the cringe, please for the love of god know that while i am still cringe i am not as bad as i once was

anyways, what i am trying to communicate is that while the person who ran this blog and myself may technically inhabit the same body, we’re not quite the same person; and yet, this is still my body, my face, my words, my thoughts, all contained here, even if i no longer understand those thoughts and feelings and words, no longer feel like the face depicted is my face. going through and making every single one of my old posts unrebloggable would be not only tedious but a ridiculous, gargantuan task, considering my post count is just short of 50,000 and no matter how many of those are reblogs that i wouldn’t need to alter, it took long enough just deleting a bunch of old selfies that i truly don’t think it would be worth it

thus, my request is this: my art is all fair game, but any (old) personal posts or selfies i'd like left alone. no likes, no reblogs, just let them be, please. while i've left a good portion of the latter up for posterity, i'd prefer you not even look for them. likewise, i've gone through and deleted all instances of my deadname; do not try to seek it out. or i may smite you in real life

other than all of that, i'm willfully leaving this blog up as an archive. please don't abuse that, please respect my requests regarding what i am and am not okay with being interacted with, and please keep a healthy barrier in your mind between who i was as a teenager and my new, adult self, because even i don't know what i was going on about back then

with all of that finally out of the way, if you're looking to contact me for whatever reason, you'll find my new blog in my next (and probably final, ever, for this blog) reblog. that post is a plea for a friend of mine who i miss and have completely lost contact with to come and talk with me again, if they'd like, so i'm hoping that posting this here and giving them a way of contacting me might help if they ever come back and look at this blog, which was the impetus for me hunting down my own log-in info to begin with, though not the sole reason (i really did want to purge this fucking thing of its evils even if only a little i've been meaning to do that for ages)

i don't intend to ever deactivate that blog just as i won't be deactivating this one, but as a failsafe, you can also email nisutitja @ gmail, because i don't really wanna just... put my discord where everyone can see it. that is not my main email, but i do own that address. might be a little late on the response but it should be reliable enough

#veeeery long post huh... and probably repetitive #but i was swapping between writing this and cleaning out my blog so my train of thought. was not completely on the rails the whole time #anyways. time to rb that post real quick

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thegiantsansshipkidproject · 2 months

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Faq

Just questions I anticipate being frequently asked. Will be extended as new questions are well... Frequently asked!

Why no dreammare? Why no Fresh x minty? Why no incest ships?

They fit the stipulation I put forward in the disqualifications page that I won't do incest related things. Itd feel like I'm condoning it or I was making it seem cute in some way and incest isn't cute/attractive and shouldn't be condoned. It literally only removes like 6 ships total out of a hundred plus possibilities, cope.

Why are all the ship kids gay/trans/etc?

Cause gay rights and gay wrongs :) there are completely cishet kids though too they are just ~ rare ~

Will you ever consider adding *insert au here*?

Like I said in my disqualifications post, if they don't fit any of those to an extreme degree, especially number 2, I will consider adding them to the second list with a bunch of other Sanses.

Can I draw these ship kids? Can I ship shipkids with other ship kids/Other characters? Can I self-ship myself with shipkids here?

Absolutely! Id love to be tagged in it too! I may even reblog the post here so others can see it! All I ask is you don't put them in ships with adult characters/gen 0 Sanses/original au Sanses (like the ones on my list), don't ship them inappropriately (like a 17 year old ship kid with a 10 yr old, have some decorum) or ship them with their siblings/half siblings/other related family. In the end, I can't stop you from drawing/writing whatever you want but I sure can ignore your art and block you >;)/srs so maybe dont tag me in or send me the art where your breaking my very simple rules.

Do you ship the ships you draw for? Do you have any ships between ship kids?

Not all of the obviously but I do have a few sans amasui ships I really love like dreamfresh, kustard, outersci and others but I tend to like rarepairs the most. Also yes! I do ship some of my ship kids together with each other (blossom and moon) and with ship kids outside of my own (like luna x goth is an ancient love of mine and Doom x lux). It's abit uncommon for me but I do ship some! None of them are really canon though so if you ship them a different way, as long as it's abiding to their sexuality, I don't mind!

What dose MLM/ILW/NbLnb mean?

These are conjoining community labels and I use them more for bi/gay/hetero curious ocs. MLM means men love(ing) men and describes a man that likes other men, this label includes bi men and gay men. When I say a male oc is MLM, I mean that he knows he likes boys but he doesn't specify his sexuality further. He could like girls or enbies or he couldn't, he's not sure yet. Oh and since it's related; ILW/ILM/ILNB means intersex/intergender so ILW means intersex/Intergender loving women. I means intersex/Intergender, W means woman, M means man and NB means nonbinary.

"lesbians can't use he/him pronouns"/"Neopronouns are stupid"/*insert some other form of lgbtphobia here*

I won't entertain this. Anyone can use any pronouns ever, Neopronouns are older than Shakespeare and all LGBT discourse is poison. " I can't physically pronounce Zey/Zem!" Ok that's why the auxiliary/acceptable exipronouns(she, he, they or it) are written right next to them :) its almost like you have no excuses to misgender and mispronoun my characters :)

What's this nonbinary character's birth sex/dead name?

Although I do know (because I made them), why do you wanna know what genitals this 5 year old character has? :) that's awful fucking weird dude. Idk about youuu :) (<- not thinking about smashing your creep ass head in/hj)

"Intersex is a sex, not a gender"

Putting this to the side because I'm intersex, I've had Perisex(non-intersex people) genuinely say this and yes, people can and have and will describe their gender as Intergender/intersex. It just means that because your intersex, you can't nessesarily be labeled as cis or trans or nonbinary. Your technically cis because you identify with your gender/sex assigned at birth and that gender/sex is intersex. Technically the label is cintersex/cintergender but Intergender is basically the same. It just means your gender is your intersexuality. It's not that complicated and if you arnt Intergender, especially if you arnt intersex at all, you have no business telling us what our gender can and can't be.

How does a 3 year old know their full gender, sexuality and pronouns?

They don't! The guide is applicable to them throughout their whole lives. That 3 year old doesn't know that their polyam and bi right at that age but when they grow up, they will know and that will be their orientation and relationship desires. The ages present are really just to show the age differences between them, their siblings and the other ship kids. That 3 yr old has a version of them in a timeline right now where they are 30 years old, its all relative.

The birthdays/orientations/genders/pronouns/etc you put for the main Sanses arnt right.

Your correct. It's because I did my own takes on them and I'm basing them off my own headcanons and also because not every creator of those Sanses ever answered those questions. Technically these ship kids could both apply to my versions as well as apply to them canonically.

How do you decide their birthdays/orientations/pronouns/etc?

I spin a wheel with all the options and just pick what it lands on! (Of course with some basic stuff like no lesbian trans men, no Aro/ace/Aroace pre-teens and below, etc)

What's your name/pronouns/gender/etc?

Although my pronouns were already added to the main post, all the information on my sona's sheet applies to me, the real Zen and runner of this blog! (I go by Zen or Zenia, I'm two spirit Genderfluid and intersex, I'm bi Arospec and polyam, my favorite color is a minty teal green, I'm 23 yrs old, my birthday is June 4th, etc etc)

If you have another question and don't see it present, like I said on the main post, please feel free to send in my inbox! I'll happily answer and if I think it could come up again, I'll add it to the FAQ so it won't need to be answered again.

#the faq #faq #pinned post links

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moss-selfship · 7 months

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Hello ladies.🙂

I've got some questions for the ask game you two reblogged. Can you tell me: 1, 13 & 21?

I hope you have a nice day.🙂

1 - What sorts of things do you associate with your s/o? -

"oh efurrerything wonderful!! but if i had to pick something it would be anytime i s33 scales. He absolutely ADORES things like hiss beasts and stuff! :3"

"FOR ME ITS TATOOS! HUMANS AND THEIR TATTOOS ARE SO FASCINATING AND ROMANTIC! AND HE HAS A BUNCH SO OF COURSE I THINK OF HIM WHEN I S33 ONE! :3" 13 - What’s a typical conversation like between you and your s/o? Do you both joke around with each other and have inside jokes? Do you swap memes at ungodly hours of the night? Do you get philosophical with each other? Or are you both more likely to quietly communicate with each other, such as with looks and touches?

"our confursations are always funny and full of jokes and stuff! we have all kinds of little inside jokes between the thr33 of us." "IM THE ONE THAT USUALLY SENDS THE MEMES ALL THROUGH THE DAY TO THE TWO OF THEM!"

21 - How romantic would you say you are? Do you do a lot of romantic things for your s/o, or do find that you’re more reserved with your affections—not because you love them less, but because it’s just your personality or you’re too busy to do much else (or whatever your reasoning may be). What about your s/o? -

"well me and meu arnt the masters of shipping fur nothing. we know more than anyone what true Romance is! we are both SUPER affectionate and love showering him with love and we do all kinds of romantic stuff fur him like he does with us! i know he finds the art i draw of us all super romantic!"

"AND HE LOVES THE FANFICS I WRITE OF THE THR33 OF US! SAFE TO SAY BOTH OF US ARE SUPER ROMANTIC AND SAY HOW CUTE AND HANDSOME HE IS ALL THE TIME!"

#purrfect ship #profovember

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metalheadcowboy · 3 years

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OkY but your frog and toad reblog s inspired me because I REMEMBER THOSE AS A KID AND MY MOM ALWAYS READ THEM TO ME TO TRY AND GET ME TO READ WHEN I WAS LITTLE

but here me out

Billy recovering from the mind flayer and having nothing to do in the hospital so Nancy comes with Steve and brings a box of books to see what he wants to try. And he spots the adventures of frog and toad and Steve, who never had anyone to read to him bedtime stories, sits with him as billy reads frog and toad to him.

AHH MY GRANDMA USED TO READ ME TO BED WITH THEM WHEN I WAS A KID AND GIVE THEM DIFFERENT VOICES AND UGH!!! 🥺🥺

——

“What’s this?” Steve asked, reaching his hand down deeper into the shoe box of books Nancy brought to him. It was a bunch of Karen’s romance novels mixed in with a few of Mike’s comics he begrudgingly gave up, and whatever random books, mostly non-fiction, Ted had lying around.

But this book stood out to him. It was different from the rest, the cover art that was. It didn’t have a scantily clad woman next to an overly buff younger man, or a brightly colored super hero on the cover. It didn't have an old guy Steve knew nothing about on the front, or a war he vaguely knew about, but only from history class. Instead the front page was white with forest green leaves and two cartoon frogs, or rather a frog and a toad as told from the title.

Nancy moved the shirt and sweatpants she’d stolen from her dad’s dresser to give to Steve to the her other arm, examining the book as they stood under the blinding fluorescent lights of the hospital hallway, “Oh, Holly must have put that in.” she explained, going to take the children’s book from her ex-boyfriend to take back home, not thinking that Billy would want to read such a thing, “She probably saw everyone else putting books in and thought-“

”You think she’ll miss it?“ Steve interrupted, “Just for one night?” He ran his calloused finger tips over the glossy cover, right over the title, ‘Frog and Toad Are Friends‘, all the way to the lush grass the two illustrated amphibians were sitting happily on. Something about the book captivated his attention, made him long for something that was never even his.

He never owned any books like these, only had the ones he borrowed from the library with his nanny. He never got the experience of being read to bed with books filled of whimsy and adventure, rather lulled to sleep by silence or the sound of the television downstairs, sometimes the sound of he light in his night light if the bulb was on its last leg, but never anything like the book he was holding right now.

He couldn’t help but wonder if Billy ever got that, before his mother left that was.

”Uh,” Nancy looked down the hallways towards the elevator as if she were seeking approval from somebody who wasn’t there. It took her a minute to decide, because really it wasn’t her decision to be made, but one she had to make on behalf of her little sister, “I’m… Yeah, I’m sure it’ll be fine if you keep it for a night.”

Steve immediately caught her off guard by engulfing her in a bear hug. Long arms wrapping around her slender figure, it taking her a minute to process and reciprocate, ”Thanks, Nance,” he whispered, back hunched, chin resting on her shoulder, the fabric of her fall coat colliding with the fabric of his sweater to make a rather unpleasant noise.

Just as Steve was about to pull away and head back inside of the room to greet Billy again, Nancy grabbed his wrist.

”Forgetting something?” Steve turned back around to her full arms, remembering the set of too-big clothes and the rest of the books.

”Right,” he said, rolling his eyes are his own forgetfulness. Carefully he set the book back in the shoebox, taking the folded cardboard into his hand, holding out his opposite arm for the clothes to be dropped off of.

Just as he was about to go for the door to the hospital room and Nancy was about to go back down the hall Steve spoke up again, “Thanks again,“ he said, “for everything.”

This pulled a sheepish smile out of Nancy as shrugged, hands stuck in her pockets, “No problem,” she answered, walking backwards down the hall for a moment before turning around, leaving them to go their separate ways.

Steve let out a soft sigh before opening the door to Billy’s room, once again being greeted by the smell of hand sanitizer and rubber, or at least that’s how he’d describe it.

“Gossiping about me, Harrington?” Billy croaked out through dry lips, eyes focused on the soap opera playing on TV, one he had become quite infatuated since the start of his stay.

”Only good thing,” Steve responded with a smirk, setting the clothes and box of books down before taking the one he wanted in his right hand.

“Yeah, right,” the blonde boy retorted, “We both know that’s not true.” Steve chuckled, running a hand through his greasy hair in desperate need for a wash. In turn he looked at Billy’s own hair, half buzzed off where they made an incision on the side of his skull, for what he still didn’t know and was too afraid to ask.

“Oh, shut up,” Slowly Billy’s attention shifted from the TV to Steve, leaving the soap opera as forgotten background noise to their own conversation, “Whatcha got there?” The younger boy squinted at the book, trying to read the cover, though the feat proved to be hard.

Steve tried to play it off as nothing, “I dunno,” he mumbled, moving to settle down beside Billy on his bed, careful of the wires and such hanging off of him as he sprawled his long legs out, letting his back press again the hard mattress, if you could even call it such, “Thought maybe you’d wanna hear a story.” Thankfully the bed was already, sort of, tilted upward so he could be in a semi comfortable sitting position, Billy snug at his side, waiting for his chance to rest his head on the taller boys chest.

”From who?” Billy countered, looking up at Steve with big, expecting eyes.

“Me, you shithead,” Steve spat playfully, holding the book out in front of so Billy could see the cover if he wanted.

“Oh yeah? When’d you learn to read?” Steve sneered, lighting flicking Billy’s pale wrist, lucky it didn’t earn him a punch back, “Hurting the disabled now, huh? That’s low even for you.”

And Steve knew he was joking, knew he was kidding every time he said things like that, but it didn’t make him feel any better. Didn‘t make him feel better looking down at his boyfriend’s limp legs at the end of the bed, unmoving even if they wanted to.

“Hey now,” Billy sighed, “You know I’m just mess in’ with you.” He craned his neck up to look into Steve’s sad puppy dog eyes before bringing a shaky hand up to his cheek, “Why don’t you read me your story?” He suggested, trying to take Steve’s mind off the situation.

Steve didn’t say anything, simply opened the book up to the first page and started reading, “Frog ran up the path to Toad’s house. He knocked on the front door. There was no answer.”

Billy shifted his upper body as quietly as he could, which was not very quiet as the bed sheet material seemed to be the loudest thing on planet earth. He let his head rest in the crook of Steve’s armpit, bicep and rightmost side of his chest working as his pillow while Steve continued on.

”“Toad, Toad,” shouted Frog, “wake up. It is spring!” “Blah,” said a voice from inside the house.” As Steve kept reading the vibrations from his chest seeped through to Billy’s cheek, relaxing all the muscles in his face until it was a fight to keep his eyelids open, ”“Toad, Toad,” cried Frog. “The sun is shining! The snow is melting. Wake up!””

Before Billy even knew what was happening he was drifting off, getting tired a lot more easily now than he used to, so easy that it was almost embarrassing.

Steve got halfway through the book before he even realized Billy was asleep. And he probably wouldn’t have noticed then if he wasn’t alerted by a soft snore against his pec, already dry lips parting to let it sharp inhales of air.

The brunette let out a soft, “Oh.”, but was nowhere near mad at the fact that Billy fell asleep whilst he was reading. If anything he was happy, knowing how hard it had been for him to sleep lately. He deserved this.

Carefully, Steve placed the book on Billy’s bedside table, face open downward to the spot they left off at, or rather Steve left off at, truly having no idea when Billy stopped listening.

A gentle hand twined into the side of Billy’s head that still had messy curls, other hand resting on his chest just to feel the rise and fall, just needing to feel that to keep himself grounding.

“I love you, Bumble B,” he whispered ever so softly, really to nobody, as nobody was around to hear it, thinking that maybe, subconsciously Billy got the message, “Hope you know that.“

At that exact moment Billy stirred, shifted everything so slightly to press is face against the soft, warm wool of Steve’s sweater, humming quietly in the process. And that was all Steve needed to know, that Billy loved him too.

#Billy Hargrove #Steve Harrington #Stranger Things #Harringrove #Nancy Wheeler #You see I though I was gonna be okay writing this and then cried the whole time #I would kill for my grandma to be able to read frog and toad to be one last time #Frog and Toad Are Friends #Frog And Toad #I didn’t proof read #fair warning lmao

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fixing-bad-comic-art · 4 years

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New Tag List

if youd like something added or if i mistag something please dont be afraid to let me know

Fixes- all the edits

Not My Fix- all the edits done by other people i get tagged in/sent.

Not a fix- me just clownin around, ie asks, misc posts, and joke edits,

anon/[url]- how i tag asks

rimshots- fixes that have had a joke edited in along side the actual edit.

regularly scheduled programming- the queued/scheduled post tag

progress log- reblogs of wips i need advice on from my art blog, they get deleted from this blog about an hour after they get posted, but they do get archived on my art blog, (@bitchfitch (read the pinned post on that blog b4 following or scrolling too far, 18+ only)) under the #reblogin-for-archivin tag

booster shot- finished drawings/paintings boosted from my art blog,

reruns- rbs of edits i have already posted, as well as occasional housekeeping posts I need to boost a lil

petfuntimes- sometimes people send me pictures of their pets and i love it every time, currently all petfuntimes are queued to avoid spam

dilferapy- i just think dilfs are neat and talk about them too much sometimes,

FAQ under the cut

are you bad-comic-art? Nope, i just picked a bad url.

Why do you know so little about comics? Its bc the only pieces of superhero media i have ever consumed were wolverine and the xmen when i was like 10 and both deadpool movies.

what's your name/ pronouns/ where are you from? I'm Zachariah/Zach/Zaz, he/him preferably but tbh i dont care and you'll see me refer to myself with whatever im feeling that day. and im from texas.

what program do you use? Infinite painter on my phone

how do i submit something? You can @ me, message me, or send it as a submission, but please do not attach it to an ask bc i can't save it to my phone from an ask.

whats accepted? any professionally produced narrative illustration. so comics and manga from any publisher are in, fan art is out. having said that i dont tend to change outfits bc i just dont know enough about any of these characters.

Can i submit my own art for critique? of course! just let me know in the ask you want a critique,

whats your art blog? @bitchfitch i dont post very often but when i do its usually gay nonsense. edit: i now post more often on bitchfitch than i do this blog el oh el.

why haven't you answered/edited something i sent? 1. tumblr might have eaten it, 2. it got buried under a bunch of other stuff, 3. i meant to answer it but i wanted to give it more thought and promptly forgot about it, 4. i already answered a very similar ask. 5.the edit would require completely redrawing the og image, im just too lazy to do that, but ill usually still post it with commentary

if i dont answer something just send it again like 3 days later.

Got a PayPal/ cashapp? i only accept pictures of Nightcrawler aka Kurt Wagner as repayment for what i do here.

why do you do this? funsies.

#not a fix #faq #tag list

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lucky-bucky-boy · 4 years

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Cruel Summer Pt. III

Summary: Based loosely off of Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift. Things seem to be on a roller coaster, highs and lows and jumping emotions. A discussion about one of the pivotal points of their relationships that could either be the start of a new beginning or the awakening of a terrible ending.

Word Count: 1818

Warnings: Angst, fluff, manipulative-ish speech, very slight age gap, implied smut, almost ddlg elements but not quite (Please let me know if I missed anything, I will be happy to add on)

A/N: Tags are at the bottom. I am so sorry this took literally a lifetime to write and get out but its FINALLY HERE. Will be added to AO3 at some point. NO spoilers, takes place before the events of Knives out. Read Part One Here // Read Part Two Here

I do not own these characters. Do NOT repost my writing and/or fics anywhere without my written permission. Reblogs, likes, comments, and constructive criticism welcomed and highly appreciated.

Hummingbirds sang their beautiful song, fluttering through the evening sun. Wind bristling through the trees, the faint sound of wind chimes and a bird splashing in the bird bath. The outside air; light and warm, a breath of life and happiness. Almost taunting with how it didn't change from how it was left.

It was a stark contrast to the nearly tangible heaviness that cast itself inside, sitting thick and awkward. The sound of a metal spoon clinking against glass nearly drowning out the sound of the help Ransom paid to stay and make dinner. The warmth of the cup of tea keeping thoughts from straying too far as tension begin to settle.

Uncomfortable shifting in the dining chair, occasional, timid glances to the man next to you. Never had you ever seen him look so raw. His hair pushed back from running his hands through it so many times, instead of from the numerous products you knew he had stocked in his closet. The sweater he wore, albeit already worn, was so stretched out from him pulling on the cuffs that it naturally just rested against his palm. One hand fiddled with the fabric as he bit at his nails on the other.

The last time he even looked remotely this nervous was after a few drinks when he showed you some writing he had done, something he hid but was proud of. And that was easily more than a year ago. But now, now was different. This almost looked like regret.

After a quick sip of the warm liquid to calm your nerves, you cleared your throat, looking over at him. Ransom's gaze quickly snapped to focus in on you, waiting for you to speak.

"You asked me to stay, so what is it you could possibly want to talk about now?" You hadn't meant to sound so rude, but the exhaustion and irritability of the situation had settled heavily. You'd give anything to just have this over with, to be able to be alone and process everything.

Ransom opened his mouth to speak, but closed it before letting out a sigh as he ran a hand through his hair. "I just don't understand how we're somehow on the same page and not at the same damn time. Frankly, I don't understand how we were both there and you somehow… came out feeling like, like that about it, about me."

A scoff escaped from you, shaking your head and looking at him with utter bewilderment written on your face. "Ransom, you truly don't see how I could have fallen in love with you?" His only response was a look that was somewhere between confusion and certainty, as if he was confused as to how love was even an option.

"Okay then," you took another sip of your tea before staring back at him, determined at this point to at least make him see it your way, if not to even hurt him a little. "Tell me, how do you remember our trip to Paris?"

He huffed out a chuckle that was void of amusement, eyebrows scrunched as he shrugged, "I don't know, it was about a month after I started fucking your brains out. Woke up one morning and told you to pack a bag, which you did because at that point you did whatever I said, and we flew to Paris in my private jet. We spent a week there, having sex and eating at fancy restaurants. I bought you a bunch of clothes and jewelry. Then we came home."

Your eyes had fallen shut, shaking your head and clicking your tongue as you opened them. He looked smug, but his attitude quickly changed when he saw the anger and disbelief pouring itself out of you. "That's truly how you remember that trip?"

He shrugged, "Yeah," his voice faltered softly as he continued, "How do you remember it?"

Some part of you begged not to open that door, not to go diving in to memories that would no doubt leave you even more hurt than before.

Delicate touches and even softer sheets, a soft breeze rustling the sheer curtains that led to the balcony overlooking the city, intricate smells - a warming mixture of coffee, baked bread, and a touch of nicotine.

Everything about it screamed Paris, the city of romance, the city of love and adventure. The city that undoubtedly shifted the emotions that flowed.

"I know you're awake, baby girl," your eyes hadn't even opened yet, a smile creeping on your lips as your skin warmed at the sound of the pet name.

There was that low chuckle, the one the vibrated the chest your head rested on, that made you melt and float at the same time. The delicate touches, the soft swirls he drew on your back turned to a firm squeeze on your hip. "Get your sweet ass up, I'm taking you out."

Ransom slid out from underneath you, soft whines leaving you in protest as you finally opened your eyes to look at him. You were met with his bare backside as he made his way to the bathroom. "I'm too sore to move," you called out with a pout.

He stopped at the door way, looking over his shoulder at you, eyes dark and a shit eating grin on his face. "Well, I suggest if you want me to kiss it better, you better get your ass in the damn shower."

"Where are you taking me?" The words came out as a giggle as you clung onto Ransom's arm, blindfolded and letting him lead you to God only knows as. The ground beneath gradually became flat and smooth, unlike the walkways of the streets.

"You're not selling me off, are you?" You teased.

Ransom chuckled and you could feel his body move as he shook his head. "No, sweetheart. You're worth much more than everything you're about to see. It'd be hard finding someone willing to pay that much."

He stopped moving, reaching up to slowly pull the blindfold off. "You used to talk about visiting art museums all across the world when we were little, so I figured this'd be a nice little treat."

You squealed softly and you took in your surroundings. You were standing in the middle of the Tuileries garden at the Louvre, beautiful sculptures and flora overwhelming your senses. "God! You really do spoil me," you look at him with a bright smile. "Come on, I'm dragging you through as much as possible before you decide it's time to leave."

He smirked and shook his head, "Well, we have reservations at 6 for a restaurant not too far from here. But other than that, the day is yours, princess."

"You're letting me decide what we do for a whole day?" You raised your eyebrows at him.

"What can I say? I'm full of surprises," that cocky tone was something you were coming to love more than tolerate, "Lead the way."

It was no wonder Ransom made you wear a nicer dress that day, insisting on you putting a little more effort into your appearance than usual. He never asked for anything like that. You found it odd earlier that morning as you smeared his favorite red lipstick across your lips, but as you stood outside the restaurant where meals cost easily as much as your phone bill, you understood.

A balcony seat with a view overlooking the city. The sun was just starting to set, spreading hues of pink, purple, and gold in the sky as the lights from the Eiffel Tower could be seen glowing in the distance. People were still bustling in the streets, couples hand in hand, kids running and laughing, the occasional Parisian leaning against the stone building with a cigarette. It hit you then that there was no one else you'd want to be in Paris with.

Already, Ransom had pulled your seat out for you and pushed you in, ordered your drinks and food for you, and as you looked back at him you caught him staring. For just a split second there was something more to the look on his face, a glisten in his eyes you'd never seen before. But, just as soon as you saw it, it was gone. A smirk spread across his lips, his eyes set back to their normal hue and you wanted nothing more than to smack it off his face.

Not because he was being an asshole or because he was right about something (and knew damn well you were wrong), but because you knew this time that smirk was hiding something. But the time to pester and whine was neither here nor there when you were surrounded by riches, lavished in the luxury that was Paris, the upscale restaurant, and the company of Ransom.

The cool metal of the railing nipped through the material of your shirt as you overlooked the now dark city from the comfort of your hotel room. A few glasses of wine you normally wouldn't drink, a shared cigarette you didn't quite like but did anyway because "it's a part of the experience"; and quite honestly, Ransom could get you to try anything at least once.

The padding of his bare feet across the floor and onto the patio pulled you out of the replay the was looping in your head. The soft smiles, the feeling of his hand in your, the laughter and warmth that filled your chest all day quickly being pushed to the side as he reached his arms around you, quicker than you could turn around.

Ransom clasped a necklace around your neck and when you looked down to examine it your heart swelled. A dainty, chain with a nice size diamond laid against your skin. If you didn't know any better your say it resembled a heart but… maybe that was just wishful thanking.

"Ransom, you didn't have to ge-"

"I wanted to," he quickly cut you off, "And be a good girl for me and don't ever take it off." He looked at you expectantly as you looked back at him, eyes glossy and a slight pout to your lip as emotions overwhelmed you. "Promise?"

"Promise."

Reaching into your bag you pulled something out. Without even looking at it you tossed it at him, annoyance and hurt written on your face as you both watched the diamond necklace skitter toward him and stop by his hand that rested on on the table.

You watched as Ransom picked it up, swallowing hard and jaw setting as he examined the piece of jewelry. A sigh and shake of his head as he eyes fell to the little "H" he had engraved on the backside of it.

You smirked, huffing and biting the inner corner of your cheek before speaking, "Go ahead and tell me again how this was just an arrangement."

Taglis (cross through means you were unable to be tgged) @sweetlittlegingy @star-spangled-steve @jessiejunebug @fresa-luna @thegirlwithpaperheart @jesaigne @introvertedmouse @sinner-as-saint @sp2900 @qrndevans @dammitcaswhy @livsheph @darcia22 @paranjaperiyauniverse @dramaticsassmaster @rose-k @lovemesomeavengers @steeeeverogers @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall @bemysugarbean @dreamlesswonder86 @ambrosixx @heyiamthatbitch @daazzeey, @fresa-luna @bitchcraftandwitchery @thatoneslytherinbeater @breezyfreezey @quesadellacatburglar @renxzs @imsonick @sambucky8 @honeybabybubba @lover1307 @marvelismysafezone @bxby-kittxn @nibbles7192 @21stcenturywitchcraft @ssworldofsw @im-married-to-chris-evans

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seb-owns-these-tatas · 4 years

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Puppet Strings

Please don’t police the shit out of me for this one (I’ve read and seen all of what’s happening in Tumblr with the talented authors 😭😫---either way, I DGAF if I get judged for writing this. Y’all are getting this for free. LMAO. Welcome to my freakin’ kinky world. 😭

MASTERLIST

Characters: Stephen Colley x Reader

Summary: You’ve had Stephen wrapped around your finger by using your family’s kindness to your advantage---keeping him guilty and complying over whatever wishes you wanted---he was giving it due to your manipulative, cunning persona. You were being head-over-heels for him that made you have your reasons, thinking that being the way you are was fine for your strong obsession.

Warnings: NSFW 18+ Manipulative reader. Obsessed reader. This is quite dark for me because she’s using our puppy to her benefit (somehow?)---using Stephen as if he’s her boy toy. Spitting. Sub!Stephen. Porn with a plot. (Though, this was planned to only be porn without a plot LMAO) Dub-con. Exhibitionism. Angst? Thirsty ass reader. Not connected to the plot of the movie.

Words: 3,810+

A/N: I didn’t know what happened that this ended up this way. Please don’t judge my soul for this.I was all ‘oh my baby stephen’ to writing this filthy shit. Also, Stephen’s 20 in this and the reader is 19, okay? So, legal. (In my country it is) ENJOY, FILTHY LADIES! This made me pout because of how soft Stephen is and the reader is quite...Eh. 😭 I think this will be a 3-5 part fic. Heehee. Or maybe not----lmao. We’ll see.

Don’t forget to REBLOG, COMMENT OR GIVE FEEDBACK IF YOU DID LOVE THIS PART! IT’LL MAKE ME SMILE! Sorry for the grammatical errors and such because English isn’t my mother tongue! PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK AFTER READING, BB!

Disclaimer: PNG’s and pictures used in edits are not mine even the GIF’s too. However, the edits and this fanfic is definitely from moi.

MY WORKS ARE NOT NOT NOT NOT NOOOOOOT TO BE POSTED ON ANY OTHER WEBSITES. My official username in Wattpad is “TATATHEPOTATO” and that’s the only other site I have for writing aside from Tumblr. Thank you, Tater tots!

THE SMELL OF BLUEBELLS WAS ARDENT AND SWITH, it's scent thoroughly withstanding and wafting through your nose with the odor of sweat. Stephen's earthy and musk scent adding more stimulation to what was being given down south and around the canvas of your breasts.

An ample amount of slime trailed a path from the swell of your knockers through the meander of your neck, feeling a pair of soft, delicate lips having its way and paving to have a suck; thrilled and exploratory over giving you a mark that you surely ordered him around to.

You've felt the tiny nibbles on your neck, feeling full over being filled by the cock of your family's lackey who happened to be under your manipulative, presumptuous fingers. Stephen was having his way with you, as he was commanded to do so in the middle of harvesting crops; all sweaty, dirty and masking in his domestic labor as your fingers hooked along his belt hoops, pulling him away from the field towards a veiled place where bluebells were filled.

The first time you've had sex with Stephen, he was beyond hesitant. His rosy cheeks fueled as if it was on fire from the moment you've asked him for more of his services; to be the one to take your virginity rather than a rich, middle aged man who had terrible mustaches that crept the heck out of you.

Stephen and his pure innocence understood your favors of help by wanting him to accompany you in the city while you buy things for yourself or stuff that your mother asked to buy.

Much to your dismay for his lack of apprehension, It wasn't the type of aid you were asking for.

How pretty his face flushed a lot more from how you've frankly told him that you needed a different type of assistance to satisfy that curiosity of yours made you giggle, the desire pooling more in the pit of your stomach, filling in the prurient passion as if it was enough to stimulate you.

Stephen Colley was utterly pretty, beyond God's work as he was sculpted with a face of a Greek God as people have been saying. Your family even admiring God's work of art by how he was created; enough to be painted and inspired to be sculptured in the museums. He was the first boy in your fantasies and the only one that could make you breathe deep breaths in between rubbing the itch in your mound as you explored your body by yourself that nobody ever had yet.

He was your fantasy. The boy in your dreams that you would gladly want to have in your life for years end.

After welcoming the afterglow of an orgasm, such debauched thoughts came into your head in the same time you've wanted to rub onto that button again for thinking about him.

You were going to have him. You wanted him, you've mindlessly convinced yourself. Stephen was a plague that could infect your precious little mind---the facade of an innocent, kind and shy sweetheart that your family has been seeing from you was ruined when you've reached puberty.

It wasn't helping that Stephen walked around the house with clothes that you surely want to ruin. Your mind being influenced by your older sister's experiences with men and how her sex life have been.

She was a wild one and deep inside---no matter how much you tell yourself that it was a deed that people respectfully hold onto, the untamed part of you wanted to experience it with the boy who had adorable rosy cheeks and a gorgeous accent that could make you gush.

Being in line with the heavens, you were lucky Stephen was quite naive despite being a year older than you and with all the plans you had inside your head, being manipulative and guilt-tripping him till he would obey was the only answer for him to accept your offers because the boy was beyond nice and respectful, innocent---delicate as he may seem in being a rose without thorns amongst the bundle of daisies growing along the field.

You weren't his first to be honest; hearing that he had his virginity taken by a lady when he was taking a trip to the city, the woman being older than him and enamored by his beauty, she was very pretty as Stephen saw her the first time---growing a little crush before the lady has offered him a night filled with pleasure, leaving him alone the next morning and a ton of cash that has left him heartbroken by expecting a number or a sweet filled morning with her.

Was this obsession you had for Stephen? you couldn't tell while having the luck of being boffed by him no matter how tentative he may been. The phrase you've been telling whenever he was reluctant held a powerful will for making him capitulate over your wishes.

'You're working for us---I'm your miss. Shouldn't you always follow what I have to say, Stephen?'

Guileful and conniving for you, but you've had no other choice especially when you've heard your sister gossip about how he was starting to take a liking over a girl across the neighborhood, the lady living in a castle---going way back with him and her family because they've known each other since they were kids until they've moved away and came back to their hometown.

Cassandra. That was her name. It was a name that should be left forgotten in Stephen's mind.

Your boy shifted in between your opened legs, your dress hiked up and his trousers unbuttoned; stopping on the end of his derriere as he stuck his swollen cock inside your tight folds, kissing and licking along your throat and breasts that had you mewling beneath him.

Begging him to take you in the middle of the grass to relieve that fantasy only he could satisfy, you've laid beneath him and promised that he could take his time and do whatever he pleases. Exploring every inch and depth of your body with your dress being in a bunch and unfastened by Stephen. Today, you've just wanted to feel him, touch him and let him be inside you because of certain feelings that can't be resisted.

He was patiently taking his time, both of you basking in the afternoon glow before dusk and never bringing in a gas lamp before night even arrives. Stephen was licking your taut nub, his mouth close to your nipple as his hot breath was fanning along his own saliva, bringing pleasure and satisfaction. Another weak whimper erupted from your mouth, watching his eyes closed; tongue darting out to flick your other hardened nipple before deeply moaning out his approval as he devoured your breasts with a tight, strong suck.

The lewd action was enough to make your spine and toes curl.

You've flexed your cunt, tightening around his girth and you've heard him lowly groan with your nipple in his mouth. He immediately pulled his mouth off your breasts with a pop. Innocent, lust-filled baby blues stared above you, the flicker in his eyes asking and waiting for your next behest.

"Stephen," was the only word you managed to croak out, sounding like you were being choked as you felt him slowly pull out of your thirsty cunt. He leaned his head to the left, dipping his head and giving you a kiss which caught you off-guard; it was plain and enough to take your mind off his throbbing cock that has slithered in. After being explored by his mouth on your body, Stephen's lips that landed on you to give a peck surely felt unfamiliar because you both rarely do share kisses in the midst of intercourse.

His crimson colored lips on yours felt divine. The sudden smooch probably involuntary in his part because of how sexually intimate you were being with him. You've swallowed the moan forming in your throat by feeling him wholly pull out, moaning and whining from the lack of imbue and by forcing yourself not to have your way with his lips---wanting nothing but to dance your mouth with his.

You knew this was a one-sided affection and he didn't entirely adored you like how you do for him.

Your fingers gripped onto the grass on either side, it traveled and clasped around Stephen's neck that felt balmy beneath the pad of your fingers. Drops of perspiration smoothening out as you watched him pant above you, breathless and in a daze. His cheeks turning rosier and crimson from such scabrous act you've brought him in.

He was heavy and scathing on your thigh. His hand grabbing onto the growing base of his throbbing, uncut, hard cock as he looked between you both, a shaky breath leaving his lips as he was feeling his cock on his hands, fingers enclosing around his girth to give it one jerk that made you salivate.

His neck was sweating, drops of perspiration falling along his temples and to distract yourself, you've darted your tongue out to sweep the sweat off his face, catching him off guard that made him throatily groan and cast you a look, his eyes withdrawn and thoroughly focused on what taboo you tried to help him be accustomed with.

The place you decided to be ravished on was rather risquè but also getting you more thrilled to know that your sister knew this spot as a location you always spend time with whenever you were reading. You've heard tiny shuffling of bushes which made Stephen look away and observe whoever that was with his eyebrows knotted together---distracting him and pushing the worry away just like you always do, you've quietly whispered in his ear.

"Put that cock in me, Stephen. Please,"

At the sound of you pleading, it was enough to pull his thoughts away from being concerned over your family catching you both in such a raunchy moment. Their daughter laid amongst the land, being ravished by their worker who they've trusted for all their heart---a boy whom they didn't expect to be salaciously connected with you.

The both of you were in for a tough scolding if caught.

Pointing the head of his cock in your entrance, he'd swiftly drove in. You were wet enough for him to slip inside with the right tightness of your cunt that pushed him to grunt as he filled you in one go. Your back curled from the penetration, the thirst for sexual gratification being answered by Stephen when he started to thrust his hips, experimenting over the pace that could make you moan around his arms before pummeling like how he wanted to.

"Oh yeah---yeah---yes, just like that," you've choked in your own moans and pleasure, licking your lips and watching how he was defiling your cunt with his cock, your slick moisturizing his---the filthy sound of your juices coating his, thrusting in and out of your folds; becoming music to the sound of insects probably watching how you were both sending each other raptures.

Stephen knew how thrilled you were becoming by the audible sound of how filthy he was making you feel. Being aware of the obscene sound whenever he tries to fasten the pace, slowing down to let you both appreciate the erotic sense of debauchery has gotten you biting your lip up at him.

You were his miss and whatever you wanted was his job to give.

He'd slip a hand in between you, the pad of his thumb finding your clit and when he did, Stephen started rubbing that throbbing nub of yours in rough, circular motions making your core jerk, your hips chasing his hand with each thrust he gives; entirely accepting and embracing the sheer pleasure he was giving.

Your boy was deeply grunting with each shove of his hips, his cock befouling your scheming soul and you were loving every moment---cherishing the sounds he create that only you could muster.

Only you, not Cassandra---not anyone.

In the midst of such onslaught and currently trapped in your own bliss, you've never took heed of Stephen panting out your name; thinking that he was bemoaning his desperation for continuously prodding your hole in a greedy pace, his carping had a flicker of perturbation in his diluted, lust-filled baby blues as he tried to catch your attention.

"Miss---Miss," Stephen couldn't stop his smutty assaults. Too concentrated on reaching both of your highs as he peered down at you with his peepers growing larger when he heard your name being called from afar; being an echo of warning that what you were both caught up with was utterly unchaste.

"---your family---ugh---they're seeking for you," he grunted with every word and plunge; his pace never stopping and his fingers reaching further down to polish your clit. Your leak being spread all over your folds as he licked his lips, admiring how you were writhing beneath his body---how you reacted to his ministrations.

Their voices echoed from afar, alerting you both that they were closer than you imagined them to be. It was the dead of the night already, the time after nightfall as you both welcomed the sins of passion that you have gotten Stephen to be involved in again. Being in the shadows of the night, the moment was easier to covert from your family as you laid to satisfy your mania. The ruffle of grass being stepped on repeatedly actually has been the sound of Stephen ardently violating your cunt along the land of dew.

You've both turned your heads to see light coming from the far distance. A buzz of incomprehensible words of unknown from your sister who was mindlessly telling her hunches as to where you both went; remembering that Stephen was also not around for her to ask if he could buy stuff around town because it was already night time.

"Oh, yes!---don't mind them!---just do me,"

He slowed down his pace, skeptical over being caught but never stopping his thrusts while his features turned conflicted over being dubious and also feeling like he was floating for the twist of elation written on your face from his drives. You've grabbed onto his hair, roughly turning his head to face yours as he loudly grunted and groaned above you, the sound made you slip a finger on his lips to shush his moans.

"You're not going to get caught---we're not going to get caught. Just stifle your moans. You can do that. You're a good boy---our good boy and you'll make me cum, right?"

The whispers you've managed to slip past your lips made him stare down at you, understanding what you were trying to point out and it has not been seconds before he'd nodded before you, starting his relentless pace that made you sigh as he was trying to build up your orgasm again, grabbing onto your ankle and hooking it around his hip as he continued to forge himself in you; his breath hitting your face with every push---grunts being uncontrolled from the actions.

You've heard a twig break from behind, not wanting Stephen to be distracted---you've grabbed onto his face and forced him to look at you; your heart beat never ceasing to run fast whenever he stares into your eyes. The fast heart beat also being the cause of your orgasm coming.

He'd shifted in between you, your hips bucking to meet every thrust he offered. Mewling out lewd moans whenever he hits that spot that felt so heavenly. Reaching for his hand, you've guided him back to where he has been flicking---your clit that he immediately rubbed on as you were approaching your high.

Loud, rough grunts came from his throat, feeling his own coming as your cunt gripped him hard for the sounds he was creating. Your mouth and face contorted in sheer pleasure when you've violently thrashed against his hold. Stephen's unconscious response was to grab onto you, keeping you closer to his lean, muscular body---a wiry sculpted body from all the hard work that he does for your family; convulsing in his arms as you gushed around his penetrative cock.

Rambunctious ugh's came from the both of you, especially from your boy who was in the midst of coming. Your sensitive cunt was jolting as Stephen went on in propelling himself, his face of bliss bringing you ecstacy as it was hot for a beautiful face to be debauched like that. You've forgotten your family who was in search for you when he wholly pulled out just in time for him to spill his warm seed over your torso, his load shooting out in spurts as he breathed heavily above you.

You've both shared silence after a moment of paradise. As a habit you've held Stephen accountable, he'd delicately held onto your jaw with his calloused fingers, pinching them together to set forth over opening your mouth. It was an understanding and idea that you told him about after an act of pleasure. He was against the idea at first before you've basically convinced him that there would be no moment as if you were being degraded. But, he somehow has become used to it after quite some time.

Besides, it was one of your wishes. His miss surely needed to have it when she wants it.

Gradually opening your lips, Stephen has lined his mouth on you. Drawing down a line of spit and aiming to shoot it inside; thoroughly not bothered about the fact of it already as he spat inside your mouth, making you grin as he gathered his spilled cum on your torso with a finger, slipping them inside your vermillion, his eyes in a daze as he concentrated over the mouth that has sucked on his cream-filled fingers---swallowing the mixture of his saliva and release like it was food for your tainted soul.

He certainly didn't expect you to be ribald and deceptive from such a religious family---But, considering your sister and her liberated moments, maybe it was probably in the blood.

"Was it how you liked it today?" he simply acknowledged, tone curious over the fact of being caught by your family was thrilling you which is why you've dragged him along the meadow while he was working, asking him for a quick frigging in a deserted, furtive space.

Stephen helped you wear your dress after snapping his breeches back, keeping himself decent. He still wore his white, dirt-filled tank top. Slipping over his suspenders on his shoulders, the latter remained sitting on the grass as you stood up. The expression on his face mixed with a look of a puppy who was blushing under the moon light, his hair utmost unkempt and clothes looking rumpled as if he had a wild night.

"It was everything, Stephen." you softly muttered, flattening the stresses of your dress with the back of your hand, erasing any proof or evidence that you had a nooky with your family's beautiful helper. A sigh left your lips as the ache of thirst was probing your spine, yearning for more than once today.

"---But, can you do me one more favor?"

"Anything, Miss Y/N."

Stephen waited and watched for your response, seeing you ogling at his beauty as he sat silently, catching sight of those suggestive flicker of your eyes under the night.

You've knelt before him, having your height differences obvious from how you tried being eye to eye as he was still taller than you. He'd simply studied your face, changing into an expression that he wouldn't get to reject---not that he ever does because he had no other choice but to follow what you wanted because you were still his patron.

"Can you visit my chambers after dinner?"

He was quick to become uncertain over the service being asked. His thoughts hastily going to what happened in the middle of fornication a while ago; the risk of being exposed by your family for what you both decided to tumble through the afternoon, "But, Miss---"

His protests were cut short when you've distracted him with a delicate kiss to the lips, using it to your advantage as it left seeing him swallowing his apprehension down in the pit of his stomach. Kissing you back with a soft peck that got you sighing when he pulled away to wait for your answer, his complains never being risked to be told. Currently disoriented from the kiss you've given him out of the blue and from the feeling of being confused over what he should feel for letting you have him explicitly.

"My family won't be awake in the middle of the night,"

"Would...you wish to be ravished again?" he understood what you wanted. Another part of his services that he only gives you because you were artful enough to manipulate him into thinking that the idea was fine---that giving you his body and soul was fine.

Stephen had his utmost respect for everyone in your family because he was thankful for them to be employed in the household. Which is why he was even helping you in this part of favor that he surely could have no say about.

"Yes. Can I have you for the night?---I need you tonight,"

He gave a small smile, his fingers reaching for a couple of bluebells from behind. Completely helpless to be under your demands, "If you are in need of it, then I suppose it is fine. Will it help you sleep at night?" the latter slipped the flower behind your ear, his beam so precious with a soul valuable enough to be exploited or influenced by your manipulative ploys.

"Yes---Yes, it does. It'll keep me in deep slumber rather than sleeping like I never have slept at all,"

"---Then you can have me again if you want to---all night if you wish so,"

You've let him tuck the flower, appreciating how handsome and charming he sweetly smiled when you've taken his fingers and kissed every pad of it.

"Thank you, Stephen. You're amazing,"

"Anything for you, Miss."

There will be no place for Cassandra or any other women in his mind. You were determined to swarm his thoughts with only you---where he would worship no other woman nor let him have the desire to feel pleasure over others. From the moment he came into your lives, you've already marked him as your person when you were younger; having this toxic affection for him from the moment you've seen his sweet, seraph face. His personality and characteristics being adding more to your fixation when he was so kind to be gullible---fastening him in a physical-venereal connection that would aid to your benefit.

Stephen Colley was only yours and a puppy---your puppy that you would gladly take care of forever even if it means to be the bad guy in the house.

So, what’s cooking? LMAO. Leave feedbacks to give me power to write the second part. HA!

General taglist for Henry and his characters: @agniavateira, @iloveyouyen, @rahdaleigh, @silverkitten547, @henrythickcavill, @kaatelyyynn

#Stephen Colley #stephen colley smut #stephen colley x reader #i capture the castle #henry cavill #henry cavill smut #muse: stephen colley #hc #henry cavill characters #stephen colley x you #stephen colley x y/n #henry cavill masterlist #henrycavill #henry #seb-owns-these-tatas

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x-rds · 3 years

Text

Hello, we are the Crossroads System, or “XRDS” for short. We are a multiple system, traumagenic, but we do not tolerate any exclusion of endogenic/nontraumagenic systems and we all have different thoughts about the nature of our systemhood.

This blog is mostly reblogs of aesthetics, random thoughts and ideas, mental health and self help, etc, though we sometimes post our own thoughts as well.

We follow back from an art blog!

==BEFORE YOU FOLLOW==

‼️Please refrain from following if you are physically a minor. We appreciate your interest in our blog but it makes us uncomfortable. ‼️

We do not tolerate:

Exclusion of endogenic / nontraumagenic / etc systems

Ace/pan/bi exclusion

Bigoted views towards anyone for race, sexuality, gender, religion, disability, neurodivergency, etc

TERFs or anyone acting like them even if not identifying as them

Any implication that being a man or being attracted to men is bad/impure/disappointing

Any insistence that Queer is inappropriate for people to identify with

Sexual harassment/inappropriate sexual interaction

We are:

Physically adult, and most of us are adults in headspace

Collectively nonbinary and transgender, collectively Queer, collectively alterhuman

Physically intersex and transitioning as transmasc

Neurodivergent in various ways, and physically disabled in various ways

Mostly fictives, and mostly deviant from ‘canon’

Terms we use:

“Headmate” “sysmate” “member”

“Facet” (regarding our median subsystem states, not for members who are not median)

“Headspace” “inner world” “inworld”

“Exomemories” or just “memories”

Please refrain from referring to us as “alters” “personalities” or “parts”, from calling what memories we introjected with “pseudomemories”

We may use the term “alters” on occasion in reference to ourselves for various reasons but we don’t identify with it and don’t want others to use it for us

Blog content

We tag “#syscourse” but try not to post it much/get into it with others (we mostly reblog takes from others explaining why we feel the way we do rather than getting into arguments)

Mentions of abuse are tagged “#abuse //“ (we may change this, if so we will update this post)

Members tag their posts with “(name)txt/img/log” ex: staticlog, crowtxt, andyimg; overall content is sysimg, systxt, and xrdslog - if you don’t want to see stuff from one of us for whatever reason feel free to block those

Gender, orientation, and other pride flags/terms are tagged as “xrdshoard”

Be aware that we reblog (positive/joking about ourselves) things with the “f slur” in them from time to time untagged

Please note that we do not use tone indicators (such as /s, /hj, /pos, and so on). We try to stay aware of their meanings as best as we can, but they are often overwhelming or confusing to us due to our memory problems and we likely will not fully understand them. If we misinterpret something (tagged with a tone indicator or otherwise) or you are unsure of one of our posts, feel free to contact us to clear it up!

==XRDS==

Not all of us front and we aren’t sure who all is around, but the usual squad is:

*NOTE: this is outdated as hell. We are working on a website because there’s not enough images per post for intros. So bear with us!

LIO (formerly STATIC)

It/Its // Ae/Aem/Aes // He/Him

Transmasc Agender MLM/NBLNB

Adult (mid 20s)

OC fictive (The World Ends With You)

System Ambassador/Archivist

Has median internal subsystem of a bunch of facets which are kind of like kintypes but ramped up to 500% and slightly detached

I write for us most often and front most often

Minor death god

"You're milk boy" - my friend Gideon upon meeting me

———

JOSHUA

He/Him // Ne/Nym

Nonbinary something or other that vaguely resembles a man, gay something or other

Adult (specific age unknown but older than most of us)

Fictive (The World Ends With You)

Lio’s insys husband

Depressed bastard

Minor death god slightly less minor than Lio

———

GORO/CROW

He/Him

Maybe trans, definitely gay

Adult (early 20s) (24 as of October 2022)

Fictive (Persona 5) (*he likes Royal more but he isn’t from that canon)

Lio and Josh’s adopted son

Likes attention and has many fursonas

———

KOHA

He/Him

Intersex gender-apathetic catboy, gay

Adult (mid 20s) (26 as of February 2020)

Fictive (FFXIV)

Haurchefant’s fiancé

Does not talk verbally much despite fronting incredibly often; mostly sends emotions, so we will transcribe on his behalf usually

———

LOKI

It/Its

Transmasc Agender, pan

Adult (age unknown)

Fucktive conglomerate of goth fashion, various pop culture references to the Norse god Loki, and maybe also the Egyptian god Set, we aren’t sure what’s happening with it

Memelord

Lith’s thingfriend (term for partner)

———

ANDY

He/Him

The Cis One (TM), bi

Adult (30s)

Dragon Age postfictive (really wants nothing to do with his source if he can help it)

Grumpy but his heart is in the right place, loves cats

Kravitz’s boyfriend

———

Featuring occasional posts from the less common fronters:

———

RAYNE

Fae/Faer/Faen // They/Them

Xenogender of various flavors, aroace

Minor (16ish but also simultaneously an immortal fae)

Has median internal subsystem

Lio’s twin sibling

Shapeshifter light fae

———

KRAVITZ

He/Him

Some sort of nonbinary, gay

Adult (older than most of us)

Fictive (TAZ Balance) but he’s mostly moved beyond that and turned into a furry and self inserts in other things a lot

Andy’s partner

———

MEIS

She/Her // Vi/Vir/Virs // They/Them

Transfem demigirl

Adult (late 20s)

Fictive (Promare)

Loves sharks and seals a lot

———

ODD

He/Him

???, gay

Adult (age ???)

Tabletop character fictive, tiefling warlock

Big fan of metalworking and jewelrymaking

———

LITH

He/Him

Trans man, gay

Adult (early 20s)

Cyberpunk tabletop fictive

Loki’s boyfriend

———

HAURCHEFANT

He/Him

Cis+ guy, pan

Adult (late 20s)

FFXIV fictive

Koha’s fiancé

———

ZACH

He/Him // They/Them

Unknowable eldritch Angel gender, unknowable eldritch Angel sexuality

Adult (unknowable eldritch Angel age)

Kinda a fictive from the game Off but he absorbed some weird stuff and now he’s an Angel in the scary way. He’s chill though

Shows up so rarely we used to be unsure if he was even here really but his presence is unmistakeable

———

TETSU

He/Him

Cis guy who might actually be straight, we don’t really know yet

Adult (mid 20s)

More or less a factive but he sees it as being more of a ‘psychological imprint of someone’ than him actually being his source person

Literally just here to vibe

———

MINERVA

She/Her

Probably a woman but too focused on her job inworld to care about things like gender or orientation

Adult (age unknown)

Not an introject, but she does have a sword and might be a dragon sometimes

———

DEVO

He/Him // It/Its

Trans guy, probably gay but he’s not sure if his thing for older women is real or if he’s projecting something

Adult (23 as of October 2022)

Fictive (The Adventure Zone: Ethersea)

Has a fursona that’s a horrifying angel creature (affectionate)

———

NEKU

He/Him

Bisexual maybe-nonbinary Guy

Early 20s

Fictive (The World Ends With You)

Literally just chilling and vibing

———

BEAT

He/Him

Gay trans man

Early 20s

Fictive (The World Ends With You)

Hangs with Neku mostly

———

HUNTER

He/Him

Bisexual ??? Guy (whether or not he is trans is: complicated)

18 as of May 2023

Fictive (The Owl House)

Guy with anxiety who is experiencing the horrors

———

Image credits:

hellosunnycore/alohasushicore // cinnasmores // wervty

#xrdspost #xrdslog

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avi17 · 4 years

Text

Re: the nail

Hahaha so I haven’t actually talked much about AoR on here beyond reblogging things, but now I’m mad so you get A Rant. Spoilers ahead for the Dark Crystal Bestiary if you don’t have it yet (which I don’t, I’m not sure how people are getting it already but who knows)

----Spoilers past this line---

So as a few of you have probably seen, the new Bestiary book has some Skeksis and urRu bios in addition to all the stuff about creatures/plants/etc. This is all lovely, except for a detail they’ve thrown into skekGra’s. Apparently, the nail/bolt/whatever you want to call it that is driven into his skull is something he did himself, in order to “better attune his mind to the vibrations of the Crystal”?

Alright so first of all.

I think it goes without saying that the popular, honestly near-universal fanon is that this was something done to him by the other Skeksis. Most seem to think it was a punishment, a few have posited that it could have been more like an attempted lobotomy to try to cure him of what they would perceive as insanity. There’s a bunch of art of this, it’s referenced in a large percentage of fic about him, it’s the first, most logical answer given in most discussions I’ve seen. “He did it himself” was by a mile the least prevalent theory. Now I know the fans aren’t always right. And I’m not necessarily mad here that they messed up my headcanon personally- I always want more information about my fandoms, and I’m glad to have my hcs replaced by explanations that are interesting or make more sense than whatever I might have guessed. This, however, does not.

I could get past the idiocy of thinking that nailing a garden spike into your head will allow you to commune better with the planet- that could probably just be passed off as being done under the influence of hallucinogens. XD The book also mentions that binding his arms behind his back was something he also did himself, as penance for his earlier violence. That I could also get behind, on its own. But combined with the nail, that means that in response to skekGra’s betrayal of them and everything they stand for- possibly the greatest offense ever done against them- the Skeksis did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. A race known for delighting in gruesome punishments, who have chopped off hands and fed eyeballs to bugs for comparatively minor offenses- their response to this was to tell them to leave? Exile, for a character who didn’t want to be part of what they were doing anymore anyways- it’s barely even a consequence. That makes no sense, and is about as uninteresting and anticlimactic as that part of their backstory could be. Plus, the puppet show specifically depicts the Skeksis attacking them- you could argue that they punished them in a less permanent way, but again, this seems very out of character for a race known for gleefully maiming each other. And skekGra’s mini-puppet depicts him without the nail, while urGoh’s still has aesthetic elements like his hat, seeming to indicate that the nail isn’t something he considers part of himself, or is perhaps something he wishes wasn’t there. If it was something he did himself and was proud of, why wouldn’t it be there?

But also, even if it was intended as some sort of tool, driving a spike into your own head is still going to be painful, and we’re supposed to believe that he knowingly did that to not only himself, but also to urGoh? When he is the ONLY Skeksis who would actually care if he caused harm to his Mystic half? Permanently binding his arms would likely also be painful and eventually damaging. I just don’t buy that he would find either of the reasons this book gave to be justification enough to do these things to himself with the knowledge that he would also be hurting urGoh. A lot of people also have posited that the nail, in addition to the drugs, might be a contributing factor in some of his erratic behavior, as it would basically be a traumatic brain injury. This, again, both makes more sense and is more interesting than “it’s basically nothing, he just felt like it.”

There’s more I could say, but it’s likely to just devolve further into keysmashing. This may very well have always been their intent with that part of the design, but I wish they’d just never told us, because it’s almost insultingly mundane, and kills one of the most compelling parts of the characters’ backstories that so many fans have expanded upon in such amazing ways. We’re told that the Skeksis cast him out and branded him Heretic, but it’s pretty both disappointing and seemingly unlikely for it to turn out that that’s really ALL they did. It’s just a case where it feels like we’ve ended up thinking about it way more than the people who actually made it, and that’s always a really big bummer. -unimpressed trombone noise-

Thankfully it’s fanfic and therefore we have the option to completely ignore it.

Art by @mystics-and-chill because we are both salty as hell.

#dark crystal #age of resistance #dark crystal: age of resistance #skekgra #urgoh #;alkdjf;a

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