#its one of the best stories ive ever interacted with and its sad to see people demand it change so much. i wish they had never changed

[casmourde]

long rant about bg3 and people's weird behavior towards larian

Larian's continued support of their game and their community has given some people genuine brain rot. We were lucky to even get bug fixes post-release (I'm a cyberpunk 2077 fan), and they were both kind and creative enough to give us a FREE epilogue and add FREE content, but the community at large has taken this kindness and changed it into something entirely different and really unhealthy. Every time Larian updates us on patches and bug fixes, there are hundreds of comments demanding Larian "add" new content, "fix" characters, "fix" relationships, and I'm just baffled by how entitled this is. Do you guys know how video games work? You know you used to just get a video game once and that was it. If you bought a video game you bought a finished product. With more and more patch-based games becoming popular (stuff like Fortnite, Overwatch, Stardew, Genshin, etc), we're starting to see this design model bleed into triple a titles, which is fine (I'm not a big fan personally but I enjoy a lot of these types of games anyway), but it's giving people a really weird, backwards attitude about BG3. At this point I question whether those people actually enjoy the game they played or not. They demand so many changes and edits to characters that I find it hard to believe they even like those characters at all, and would much rather live in their world of headcanon and fanfiction (which, again, is fine) -- but at some point we have to acknowledge that BG3 was made BY Larian. The things you see as flaws in character's stories are canonical, put there by Larian for a specific reason. If you go under every post and demand they "fix" Wyll, I think there's a good chance you need to sit back and wonder if maybe Wyll is just like that. Because he is. That is who he is in the game's text. That is his story. If you don't like it, then by all means discuss what you would change, but it's unfair to belittle Larian for the story that THEY GAVE YOU. This is not to say there isn't a conversation to be had about Black characters in gaming being given really boring, lackluster stories, because that is 100% a noticeable trend (Preston Garvey from Fallout 4 comes to mind). This attitude also unfortunately extends to Gortash fans, and I know I'm kind of shooting myself in the foot here, but I want to discuss it lmao. I liked Gortash "before it was cool" you could say, back when the game dropped and it was gross to think he was attractive, et cetera (this is not something to be bragging about i know), and now that it's been kind of normalized to like him, Gortash fans are getting really invasive and, to put it bluntly, annoying. They whine like children in Larian's comments sections and on their own accounts about how Larian is so "unfair" to Gortash/Durgetash, how they are purposely removing Gortash content from the game to mess with us, etc. Once again, Larian cannot physically be "unfair" about a character THAT THEY LITERALLY MADE THEMSELVES. THEY choose what content to put in THEIR game. The Gortash that is in the game is the Gortash that they decided to put there. Nobody is hiding anything from you, nobody is hurting you, you're not special or different, there is no anti-Gortash agenda. If you can't engage with the canon content that Larian gives us, then I suggest that, for your own health, you move on. Gortash is my favorite character in BG3 because of what Larian did with him, not because of what he could potentially be if Larian bowed down to all of us and gave us everything we wanted. "Gortash romance when" NEVER!!!! And that's the fun bit!!!! We can all go crazy imagining what it would be like and we can make fan communities and fanfictions and art and it's awesome! Speculation and headcanon are awesome! Just stop expecting developers to cater to your every whim! It's unfair and will end up with you being sorely disappointed! Enjoy what they gave us and change it to fit your fantasy! If you like a thing, engage with it, play it, thank the people who gave it to us. Don't pester it to change.

[astro-can]

recently finished reading hunterxhunter and im here to give my deepest and honest opinions

it was really well written and well played-out. the author is a genius, and i can tell that he puts in a lot of effort into the story. my personal favourite arcs are yorknew city and the chimera ant arc, although the 13th chairman election is a close second.

my favourite character is def kurapika. this man is smart, pretty, talented, skilled, and has good morals. please marry me

other characters i like include machi, gon, killua, komugi, biscuit, and feitan.

mereum was one of the best written villains i have ever seen. his character development as well as his growing affection for komugi is the SWEETEST THING IVE EVER SEEN although i cant say i was sad when he died. i was so glad it was finally over because i couldn't have withstood another chimera ant arc.

and of course: the ships

i've been looking through some of the most popular ships and i would humbly like to say my own opinions on them. killua x gon seems so basic, because it seems like people are shipping them just because 1. they are male and 2. they are the two deuteragonists. its been specified that their best friends throughout the entirety of the series, and i'd like it to stay that way. also, they're like, 12. (totally respect your opinion if you ship it tho, because i ship satosugu and its sort of the same situation) another ship i don't particularly like is kurapika x leorio. i love them both but again, i feel like they're getting shipped just because their male and yall are thirsty for bl.

one ship that i find is super sweet is pokkle x ponzu. its semi-canon and they've barely interacted, but itssosweetomgimgonnacryihopetheygetrebornhappily

and of course, mereum x komugi. love it. no more words.

one thing that i didn't really like about hxh is how fast it transitioned out of gon and killua to kurapika (succession arc). 1. where is killua 2. where is leorio 3. i would like to see a kurapika and gon interaction please 3. ging?????hello?????where this man at (if he's still with that rat pariston or wtvr his name is i will throw hands)

genuinely hope the author gets better soon! rooting for his recovery. and if he does pass away, i heard that his wife (author of sailor moon) will take over.

anyways you guys can expect some hxh fanart coming soon

have a nice day

[scalproie]

subscorp for the ship meme?

teeheehee :)

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

• When I started shipping them: hey did you guys know theres a chin tilt™ in the movie Mortal Kombat Legends: Battle Of The Realms (2021) that Ive seen this january of the year 2022

• My thoughts: I hate them so much. theyre perfect foils in almost every way you can think of. they have an extremely appealing enemies-to-friends arc. in fact they tick most of the enemies-to-friends-to-lovers dynamics in one way or another, in one incarnation or another. with the multiple timelines deal you can even sprinkle a little bit of soulmates trope in there. you cannot have one without the other in the general consciousness. theyre perfect opposites and so similar at the same time. their shared storyline is Romantic with a capital R, with its fair share of drama, revelations, guilt, duty, honor, and conflicted feelings, two assassin clans alike in dignity, in fair earthrealm where we lay our scene. theyre LITERALLY fire and ice and everything about them just bring you back to that point. AND theyre both stupid pretty on top of that.

• What makes me happy about them: they were grown in a lab for 30 years to appeal to me personally💙💛 literally tick every single boxes

• What makes me sad about them: if they werent two guys they wouldve been canon ages ago and you know it

• Things done in fanfic that annoys me: mischaracterization in favor of the author's personal fantasies, usually sexual. Sucks so much when a good fic or a good concept gets ruined by them being OOC during (sometimes uneeded) sexy times. I know thats like, 90% of the fics on AO3 but still, lemme mourn.

• Things I look for in fanfic: if we're going Legends or OG timeline, you can never go wrong with a good old devoted protector scorpion. If we're going current timeline, oooh babey gimme that grandmasters middle age mutual pining, sometimes keeping things simple is where its at.

• My wishlist: so fun fact, most of my wishlist already kinda happened, thanks snowblind but literally everything before it. So I guess I would really just like to see the two of them interact in a casual setting for once, see how theyd normally interact. Second would be cuddles and kisses ofc.

• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Im a subsmoke enjoyer but ONLY in a tragic doomed teenage romance kinda way, two boy best friends in an extremely restrictive environment that forbid close bonds let alone intimate, come on. Other than that... kuai has stupid chemistry with a lot of characters but in the actual story i dont see a lot of potential candidates. As for hanzo, I like him with harumi ngl, if he manages to get his family back good for him, but just like kuai, the ninjas are pretty isolated otherwise and have the closest narrative bond with each other so if not with the other well I dont think Id see it :/

• My happily ever after for them: Legends/OG timelime wise, scorpy continues to play guardian angel with benefits while kuai gives him a purpose, current timeline is the two grandmasters accidentaly making their clans more and more alike due to them sharing a similar mindset, which could perhaps eventually end with them reuniting the clans as it once was, as joint grandmasters wink wink. but my personal favorite is the mk9 sub zero ending where both of them "disappear together into legends" and are just living together in a little house in the middle of nowhere when theyre not avenging the innocents. and disappear even more into legends when they both get to the netherrealm killing the shit out of everything in sight there.

[telehxhtrash]

I know its a big debate but I am not a dudebro for thinking killua and gon are platonic. I have no problem with people who do at all, but I honestly just think they have a strong friendship, and I am for encouraging boys to have these types of bonds with each other ~screw toxic masculinity~ I like following your blog btw

Hi ! First of all, thank you for liking my blog! I’m glad you’re enjoying my content even though I’m killugon trash HAHAH

Oh lord, it really is a big debate. I’m not calling everyone who doesnt like a romantic reading of killugon a dudebro, only the people who are vehemently against it because they say people are projecting and that there is no basis to our claims that hxh is queer work.

This is gonna be me ranting for a bit because it’s a subject that’s very dear to me so i’m very sorry in advance, it’s not against you, just a general statement !

I totally agree that fuck toxic masculinity. It’s so fucking toxic and men should be allowed to show emotions, affection and care openly without fearing for repercussions. And having portrayals of friendships where the characters are not afraid of sharing their love with the other in a totally platonic way is amazing.

However. 

There’s been countless representations of this type of relationship in media over the years. In every media, not only anime. I always cite the same example, but take Naruto who is the example that speaks to me the most. (ive never seen it so dont flame me if i say dumb shit). But from my understanding, Naruto and Sasuke’s relationship was a full on middle finger in the face of toxic masculinity. They shared a deep bond, pretty much like Killua and Gon’s. I know a lot of people shipped them because their relationship was borderline homoerotic, but in the end it was just a beautiful representation of a very deep platonic friendship. 

And when you’re queer, it’s heartbreaking. Because you’ve been projecting this entire time, for the work to tease you, to literally bait you into showing you inherent queer behavior only for it to say “haha lol jk” at the end is fucking rough. Especially when you’re young and questioning your sexuality, looking at relationships between two best friends and thinking “oh, this feels like I feel when I’m with my best friend, is this romantic love?” and then the work saying nope haha its purely platonic ! its rough. trust me. 

The community doesn’t have a lot of positive, healthy queer relationships to identify with. Especially in anime. Most queer relationships are labeled under the special genres “shounen ai” and “yuri” (both of these categories painting queer relationships in the worst possible ways ever btw, but thats a whole other subject). But it’s fucking sad. Because we deserve to see queer representation in works that are not classified as those genre. We shouldn’t have to dig into a particular genre to identify with characters : there should be queer representation no matter the genre, whether it be a shoujo, a seinen, or for example, a shounen battle manga.

And that’s why HxH is so important to the queer community. Because it displays just that. That you can have good queer representation in non shounen-ai genres. That queer relationships are normal and should not have to be classified under a certain category. 

A lot of queer people identify and recognize HxH as queer work, because of a few reasons. Togashi has always been interested in queer representation, having put queer characters in every single one of his works. There was a trans girl in YYH, a trans man in Level E, Alluka in HxH. Togashi also wrote several gay characters in both of these works. I always repeat myself on this, but Togashi also wanted to write a gay sports manga, but was turned down. His favorite manga when he was younger was a shounen-ai. So yes, Togashi has deep history and is very involved in queer representation.

Togashi is also very fucking smart. Just look at all the metas people are producing every day about hxh and understand how much effort togashi has put into his work : he’s a smart man, who makes conscious choices about everything he puts in his manga. So when you see the way he portrayed Killua and Gon’s relationship, and for now most importantly Killua, you know it’s not accidental. Togashi has put SO much subtext in his work about Killua in general, from his birthday being Tanabata to him wanting to commit a lovers’ suicide with Gon, and Togashi KNOWS how it comes across, he’s not dumb. He knows what those things mean, he knows that a shinjuu is a heavily connotated word, and that people, ESPECIALLY JAPANESE PEOPLE who have the cultural context, are gonna think “oh, maybe Killua is gay”. Because that subtext is intentional. And there’s a lot of it. If you haven’t read my post on the subtext of HxH, I invite you to do so because there’s a LOT of it. 

In short, HxH has the subtext, has the potential and has the one author that is not afraid of putting queer stuff in his work. That’s why Killugon is so important to the community, and that’s why a lot of people, especially queer folks, insist on the romantic reading of their relationship. 

Because it’s extremely important to queer people. Positive representation of queer relationships in anime is hard to come by, ESPECIALLY in the shounen genre. And sadly, because our society is drowning in deep internalized homophobia, people easily dismiss queer behavior in media as platonic actions.

How many times have I seen people assess that two people of opposite genders in an anime are in love only because they looked at each other once (take Ponzu and Pokkle for example). Or because they held hands. Our society is so quick to romanticize interactions between two people of different genders, but fail to do the same when it’s same-gender pairings. 

Straight people hand holding, kissing, blushing around each other, admitting their love out loud, looking at each other’s eyes deeply are immediately categorized as in love. But when it’s people of the same gender, people immediately say “it can be platonic”. And whether you’re aware of it or not, that’s internalized homophobia.

That’s why it’s infuriating to see people dismiss the subtext that Togashi has tried SO HARD to plant throughout his story. Because it’s there, and if Killua was a girl, there’d be way less people opposed to a romantic reading of their relationship. Because it’d be widely accepted that Togashi is writing them as a developing couple, no questions asked. 

Which brings me to my final point (promise, I’ll stop ranting after this). Sadly, the voices of the people who assert a platonic reading of a relationship are often louder than the voices of queer people who identify with the work. When confronted with an ambiguous relationship between a same-gender pairing, people unconsciously tend to choose a platonic reading of the relationship. Which is harmful to the queer community, because the voices of the queer people who identify with the work are silenced. 

In conclusion, yes, representations of deep platonic friendships without toxic masculinity are good, and very much encouraged. We’ve just had a shitton of those over the years, and queer people are craving for proper representation. Togashi is deeply invested in positive queer representation, has planted a lot of conscious subtext in HxH, and he’s the one author that would NOT queerbait. So people being insistent that Killua is pretty much canonically gay, and that it’s likely that Killugon will be a romantic pairing is not for the sake of mindless shipping. It’s because there are a lot of reasons to believe that this is Togashi’s intention.

And like I said, sadly, people insisting on a platonic reading of their relationship is unintentionally harmful to the queer community, because people are so quick to dismiss elements that make queer people identify with the work as platonic behavior, dismissing queer people as “wishful shippers”. 

There are plenty of reasons to believe that HxH is queer work, and while platonic readings of killugon’s relationship are valid, it sucks that it’s become overbearing in the anime community, to the point where outside of tumblr, people literally bully you for thinking that there’s a possibility Killua might be gay and in love with Gon. (trust me, i’ve faced a lot of people saying that it’s disgusting to label killua as gay)

So yes ! Killugon can be read as platonic. The queer community is just very adamant about people not dismissing Togashi’s subtext because HxH is the healthy, positive representation we need. It’s a beautiful piece of work that has the full potential (and who is most likely headed this way) to display a healthy, loving, positive canon gay relationship between two of its main characters. 

Showing that a shounen battle manga can feature a canon gay relationship, showing that you can be young and gay and what you thought was best friend behavior was maybe romantic and that it’s okay because feelings change and are hard to figure out especially when you’re young and queer !! 

And most importantly showing that unlike every portrayal of deep male best friends relationships in shounen anime that turn out to be painted as purely platonic, sometimes behaviors that queer people identify with ARE queer behavior, and not just platonic love, but romantic, homosexual love. 

[ronnytherandom]

I forgot to watch content all week so i wrote about games ive been playing

9/2/2021: The Truman Show

You should fear your fears but embrace them and use them to guide you into the unknown, to explore and experience what life has to offer. Fear stands between you and the fullest experience of life so you must pass through it to better yourself. Heed not the walls built about you and the chains made to hold you. Though the architects insist it will preserve your life, containment is anathema to life. Do not take in faith the benevolence of powers that be; instead trust those who would support and liberate you, guide you through fear and into life.

As best I can lay it out, I think this is the philosophy of the Truman show but there is so much more to read into it also. There is critique of systems of commodification and celebrity (i.e. capitalism) reducing human beings to a consumable good as well as encouragement to find and pursue your goals despite adversity and even sensibility which is also tied to the illusion of economic responsibility. You can’t put a camera inside a human head, you can never “know” them without being an active and intrinsic part of their life, but also there is need for reciprocation. If one half exists with ulterior motive then the entire relationship is rotten; sincere humanity is what creates real connections. Without such your world is fake. A world built around one person is a world where no one can truly live. All these actors have given up basically their entire lives for the sake of watching Truman have his life built around him by outside forces, have allowed themselves to be commodified and dehumanised for the good of one man, Christoph. The man at the top has delusions of grandeur and thinks only of his own bottom line, he cares not for his subjects but simply wants them to do as he tells them because it benefits him to commodify their lives and interactions. Even then he cannot stand to lose control and in seeking to demonstrate Truman’s “realness” he structures his life so thoroughly that eventually there’s no reality left, only a script and adverts. But the people watching still empathise with Truman because everyone in the working class understands what it is to be trapped because real life is our own Truman show and one day we must all pass through fear, step out of the dome and create a real life for ourselves outside of the system of commodification which consumes everyone’s life and removes all realness and sincerity and emotional catharsis from it.

I unreservedly love this film.

14/2/2021: Assorted Game Reviews

Horizon Zero Dawn (Unfinished due to technical issues, 45 hours inc. parts of Frozen Wilds): This game is really cool and really fun. I think it is defined by its incredible setting which somehow creates a fresh feeling post-apocalyptic environment. Said environment creates intriguing alt-future lore and some very interesting environments to explore. I love the machine designs (especially tallnecks!) and was very sad to hear one of their contributing artists passed away recently but I’m glad their work lives on in this visually stunning game. I’m a sucker for Ubisoft-style open world games simply because it tickles a certain kind of itch and somehow this non-Ubisoft game has outdone Ubisoft on their own formula, which is hilarious, but also good for me as running around this world exploring and clearing map markers is engaging fun. Not least because of the combat. I have a minor criticism here that the combat feels slightly awkward on mouse and keyboard, the arrows never seem to go where I’m aiming, but aside from that the experience of fighting is a grand one. Enemies never lose their threat and I love the weak spot system the game employs which makes every tool useful in niche circumstance and rewards curiosity. It specifically manages this in a way that I feel the Witcher series could learn from if it ever returns; by making head on assault less viable and encouraging tactical hunting. I do feel this system makes hunting robots so fun that by contrast hunting humans becomes a chore however, though I noted this improves in the dlc with the addition of humans with elemental weaknesses limited in number as they are. I cannot speak for the story in entirety but what I encountered was pretty good, though I feel as if it was only just really getting going at the point where I could not continue. I find Aloy to be a compelling and well portrayed protagonist and though I can guess about her origin and the ultimate end of the alt-future apocalypse I still want to see how it plays out on screen, so will return to this as soon as I’ve fixed it.

Rimworld (122 hours. Familiar with but do not own Royalty Expansion):

Rimworld is one of those super special games that I don’t think I have a single problem with. Fair warning it can be brutal and is heavily dependent on RNG but this allows it to create truly unique and interesting scenarios on a constant basis. In the wider perspective it could be described as formulaic, with regular cycles of managing the settlement between raids and random events, but the devils in the details. Colonist traits, health and skills dictate how you play and sometimes you’ll be forced to adapt as some colonists simply refuse to perform some tasks. The depth of health particularly amuses me, in that each little part of someone’s body is modelled in a way. If you’re in a firefight you may take a single bullet which grazes your finger and you’re fine. Alternately it could pierce your human leather cowboy hat, your skull and kill you instantly and the game will tell you exactly what happened. The risk/reward element is addictive enough, and that’s without accounting for just how cool it is to see your colony slowly expand. Establishing more and more options for crafting is fun and shows off the full range of different items in the game which is fucking extensive. Between clothing, weapons, armour, sculpture and drugs to name only a few you have the opportunity to create many varied production lines either for your colonists or to trade for money and there is a lot of fun to be had here as well as it is quite satisfying to see psychoid you have grown personally become the cocaine your colonists snort to help them stay awake on limited sleep. From an archaeologist’s perspective it is especially cool to look back over your base and see the hints of how and why structures were built and remember the history of your limitations and development through structure. I think the lore of the universe is really cool too, a very 40k-esque kind of place except with far less order, somehow. But the universe does an excellent job of feeling alive and moving constantly on both a planetary and interstellar level. You can fully believe that while you build wooden shacks to shield yourself from terrifyingly low temperatures there are simultaneously rich pieces of shit living it up on the glitterworld that’s one system over. The music does an excellent job of creating the wild west frontier atmosphere the game cultivates to great effect. Ultimately, for just being a grid with a series of different numbers attached, this game does a fantastic job of creating a compelling, brutal and very real colony management experience. I dont think I can properly put into words the grandness and scope of this one. I didnt even mention the modding scene, which is expansive and tailors to basically any need you could have. The Rim is a terrifying place but theres so much fun to be had.

Factorio (86 hours, mostly 1.1): Having completed a game of Factorio I can tell you reliably that this is one of the best games ever made, thoroughly addictive and fun. If you like numbers, logistics, TRAINS, its gonna be your thing. Not to mention its probably the only documented case of a game with no bugs (so far as official forums are concerned). Strictly speaking this games combat is not the most engrossing thing but good lord do you feel it when you acquire a flamethrower. The way each aspect of the game (production, research, logistics, combat, upgrades for everything therein) feeds into the next is a really well constructed balancing act such that you must experience the full game in order to complete it and I always appreciate this kind of design. I think its one of the best tenets of factory game design especially as its something present in Satisfactory too. Beyond all of this generalised good the game is also excellent in its intricacies, the architecture necessary to build a maximum efficiency base, the level of planning and organisation that can be employed is mind-blowing. Not to mention the mod community, factorion is already an extensive experience and some mad bastards have seen fit to complicate it further, hats off to them. This really is a great moment in gaming.

 Destiny 2 (198 hours, all expansions, played some post Forsaken release, mostly Season of Arrivals onwards, spent roughly £20 on microtransactions):

This is a very interesting and enjoyable experience, but I must say it can be a bit controversial at times. What its does particularly well is moment to moment gameplay and design in all aspects. The game is stunning; between environments, cosmetics, shaders ships and ghosts there’s a vast range of incredible things to see, all rooted in the “pseudo-magi-science” aesthetic it’s got going on. The class design is excellent and you really do feel like you embody this rampaging madman / agile gunman / space wizard archetype, whichever you choose to play. The abilities, especially supers, are very satisfying. Everything has heft and power behind it which can be felt in all aspects of design; sound and animation is top notch. Movement is cool, you can feel how fast you move both on foot and in vehicles and the navigation has a little fun subtlety depending on your class jump, even if you can bounce unpredictably occasionally. But for the love of god why is the wall kick in there? It has only ever served to push me from a ledge into a bottomless pit. You're looking to remove antiquated content? Start there. Some guns are not so good to shoot but there’s such a great range of guns that are fun its like complaining about one drop in an ocean; and enemies are fun to shoot at, each faction distinct in meaningful ways and presenting an effective challenge. Speaking of oceans, that’s one way to describe the lore. I haven’t dived too deep but it keeps going down forever and everything I’ve read is intriguing. As a former Elder Scrolls lore nut this is something I could definitely sink my teeth into, though its much more of a pulpy sci-fi vibe than a pure nonsense vibe. I do think the game has a bit of a loot problem, primarily in regards to the conflict between high stats and looking good. This should never be a conflict, and yes you can apply ornaments to any purple gear but that’s not enough when I spend the entire time grinding power levels and thus must change armour and weapons on a constant basis to progress. This game needs a true transmog system and if not that, rethink how gear power level works. Perhaps rather than earning new instances of gear you always possess a version of it and the loot you acquire in missions just upgrades your instance to your current overall power level? This would serve to do away with the current upgrade system which I think is a needless additional grind. Perhaps it could be retained in using enhancement cores to empower gear as present but necessitating a whole upgrade module to keep your favourite weapon on hand is kind of painful honestly. There is also at present the issue of sunsetting gear, mildly controversial to say the least. If it’s necessary to streamline the game and make it function moving forward so be it but surely loot pools should be adjusted so you can actually get useful loot from older locations? And why sunset personal instances of gear which can be acquired at the regular power level anyway? I had to throw away my favourite bow and hunt down a new version of the exact same weapon for… what reason? I do think destination navigation leaves a little to be desired also. I get that having a physical hub world is meaningful but Destiny does not have a very extroverted community; I can count the times someone noticed me in the tower on one hand. And its not even like there’s fun activities to be found in the same sense as say Deep Rock Galactic, which really does take advantage of its hub. Perhaps for players who simply want to go about their business all of the vendors could be set into a menu system where just clicking an icon takes you to their menu from anywhere in the system rather than, per se, having to go through an entire loading screen (Which takes you to orbit and back) to reach a location which serves simply as the front for four menus. These are established player problems. As a dedicated PvE player I can say that this game is immensely fun in combat and growing in power does feel really good. It’s something I recommend getting into, there’s just some very large creases that need ironing which the Bungie should really take the time to address rather than pushing out new in game content every three months.

[mostlikelyshutup]

thoughts while watching the first harry potter:

listen i started this list a little late im ngl but notable thoughts so far are me thinking of dumbledore as a gay idiot and still loving hagrid

do you think hes speaking in parseltongue in the zoo when hes speaking to the snake

forgot boats existed

these idiots do scream a lot dont they

i forgot how light hearted this universe really is in the first couple movies

yer a wizard harry, okay hagrid maybe slide him into it a little better

we get it tuney you have fucking trauma, doesnt mean you should abuse a child

hasnt everyone had their name down since they were born, hagrid? theres a list

i like that his umbrella is pink

are you paying for those damages hargid? stop taking the door off the hinges

though, if the dursleys are, keep breaking shit

speaking about dragons on the the fucking tube, its a miracle harry didnt get in trouble with the ministry sooner

what is hagrid's usual? does anyone know???

fucking Quirrell, cant wait for your epic love story with the dark lord

maybe we should tell the 12 year old how the fuck everyone knows his name, just maybe

they do a great job of getting the wonder down pat

how much money and licensing do you think it took for them to get all these owls on set

ahh yes, antisemitism the bank

how many vaults are in gringotts?? also if harry's vault is the potters vault, a literal like sacred 28 family, one of the original families, and its number 600 something, how many were there before the potters?? did the potters get a vault recently? or is this james and lily's vault?? how rich were james and lily if so??

look at ollivander, crazy tinker uncle, love him

this might be the socialist in me but why do people have to pay for wands if everyone needs one??

why is the dark lords twin wand just sitting around on the shelf, ollie me boy??

do you think thats Harry's true wand or do you think thats because of the horcux thing?? do you harry had to get another wand after he died?? did he? i dont remember the last movie

is ollie me boys actor wearing contacts or are his eyes just like that??

thats a very weird way of showing Halloween 81, very misleading

hagrid said ill predict voldys rise in the first movie so we can have some plot development

hagrid is late to everything isnt he? i can feel it in my bones

i swear ive seen these movies, and ive even read the first book, i just dont remember shit

youd think theyd have someone in the know stationed close to the entrance for the platform, for any muggleborns

ginnys actress really had no fucking lines in this movie did she, just had to stand there

oh wait she said good luck

amazing work ginny

ooh a warm filter

can muggles see the express? like just running from london to scotland

wicked!

you didnt have to show the woman the sad sandwich ron

i think the trolly replenishes magically, i think thats how thats how that works, i want to believe that

god i cant tell if i would love or hate hermione, shes pretentious but so was i at that age

god dont fucking point your wand right in someones face mione

how does mione know who harry is?? why does she care?

look at the tiny first years, might just go and pinch theyre cheeks

MINNIEEEE i love you minnie

looking stunning minnie, the green brings out the sternness in your brow

you go minnie, give your speech, thats my head of house

shut up draco, youre not bond

you pretentious fuckwit, your hair is brassy anyways

if this is a class of kids born in the middle of a war, how big are the usual class sizes wtf

THE FUCKING CLAP

fucking propaganda ron, you slytherin hater

what order are these names going in, did they just randomized the list

oooh we get quiet for the boy who lived, jesus let him keep living

the fact that for the rest of these people its just silent is so fucking funny to me, Harry's just fucking whispering to himself

get their attention minnie

me dads a muggle, mums a witch, bit of a shock for him when he found out

NICK, love to see you buddy

i have no emotional attachment to peeves but i feel i should mention him here

the stairs still piss me off, why the fuck would you make moving stair cases

who sets out gloves for the next day? am i the weird one who doesnt??

Minnie, you are the love of my life

shut up snape you dramatic bloodpurist incel

i know theyre setting him up to be mistaken as the villain but jesus christ hes still an asshole

your robes Neville, you forgot your robes

its weird how they have to learn all these latin charms yet only have to say up to get their brooms to work

why wont you go after him, hes obviously not exactly in control, Hooch

does Hooch only teach first years? she is quite literally the equivalent of a history teacher who coaches football

what the fuck is Quirells classroom

they dont make the house teams because no first years can try out, Ron

MINNIE PLAYED QUIDDITCH?!?!? WHY DIDN'T I KNOW THIS

why didnt you speak up earlier Mione wtf

bc the fire wont give you away, harry, better hide

FLUFFY, WHOS A GOOD BOY

they have much worse things locked up in the school, Ron

Oliver wood is a bloody liar because i still dont fuckign understand quidditch, also theres like 500 rules, wtf

thats a shitty explanation of how the game works, Oliver

BLOW IT UP SEAMUS

SHES TWO FEET BEHIND YOU RON YOU IDIOT

carrot cake? on halloween?

dont shrug as if you didnt literally bully her ron

thought youd oughta know, bit of an understatement Quirell

no duh the trolls left the dungeon ron

lying: the best start to any friendship

we're at a net zero points for gryffindor for the year at the moment

the amount of interaction these kids have with professors is so weird to me, is this what small class size do to kids?? its weird

not comforting Oliver

Okay i understand Oliver simps now, I get it okay

are there no backups or subs for quidditch? feels like there should be, like of all the games

set him on fire mione, i know hes not the villain of the movie but god he sucks

fancy flying from harry fucking potter

okay but also i feel like there are some things we should not trust hagrid with, like hes not that great at keeping secrets

why is harry excited about christmas if he thinks hes not getting presents? i knw there are other aspects but like thats the only reasont o get up early

i always remember this scene at night for some reason??

not just an invisibility cloak, THE invisibility cloak ron

btw who gives it to harry? is it remus? is it dumbledore? is it like an inheritance thing? whats up with that?

there are jumpscares in harry potter

he very much can hide, filch

stop being a narc mrs norris

does harry even know what his parents look like at this point? how does he know who the fuck is in the mirror of erised?? he doesnt have that stupid scrapbook yet does he

oh they nod, sure lets clear up that plot hole

they shouldve put sirius and remus in the mirror in that scene, shown his whole family, wouldve been a nice setup

how does rupert grint already look so tired as a twelve year old

big speech to give to a twelve year old Dumbledore, when you wont even tell him what you see

Emma really does just slam that book on Daniels hand, thats mustve fucking sucked

the fact that ive watched two movies that had Nicholas Flamel in two very different roles this year is very strange to me

well thats probably on account of it being a fucking dragon egg hagrid, now isnt it?

was hagrid a hufflepuff? i think he was, maybe a ravenclaw

yes four, you blonde idiot

that shot is really nice, it sets them apart

what happened to filch to make him such a miserable man?

ooh mention of werewolves, awooo werewolves of london

yeah just dip your whole hand in hagrid, dont be scared of the strange liquid, take a nice little bath

i loev that dog, i want that dog, i want to hug that dog

god just the look of that forest is so bloody cool

wait so is that quirell walking fucking backwards?

maybe ask who the fuck youre talking to before asking other questions??? wtf harry

why are yout talking to the centaur like hes your old friend harry, youve literally never met him before

snape doesnt want the stone at all Harry

god hagrid you sweet stupid man

snape is completely valid for that, if a twelve year old ever looked at me like that i would punch them

Do you think people ever loose invisibility cloaks? like theyre invisible do you think they ever just never get found again

i hate the look of the dog spit, that is so gross

they really left everything in except for the fucking potions didnt they, damn

harry potter walked so queens gambit could run

hermione, posted up

rons stupid in the later movies because he got a concussion as a twelve year old

god harry really posted up to beat up snape in fucking khakis

"I knew you were a danger to me!" Hes twelve, Quirell

let me wait for this weird dude to unravel his head scarf instead of running away

the magic in this movie is real fucking conditional isnt it

just some casual necromancy for the stone? you sure about that voldy, you two faced bitch?

let me choke out this twelve year old real quick

oh yeah why is he able to just avengers endgame Quirell? is there an answer to that? like was that ever found out

do you think voldy passing by him while he hold the stone actually killed him but since he holds the stone hes functionally unkillable and then some magic gets put into him and thats why he can return to life later when he actually goes to the whole afterlife place?

ohhh we're vouching on the blood magic for the endgaming of Quirell

do you think dumbledore came across the vomit flavored bean before or after his sister died?

Mione's got a headband! Looking snazzy!

how did Hufflepuff only get 352 points? Gryffindor literally lost 150 points this year and they only beat them by 50, wtf, is it because they kept getting caught with weed

I wont even speak on the fucking outrage that is this point awarding, its already been spoken on. However, Neville shouldve gotten more points

What if someone just stood up and started challenging Dumbledores math, that would be so funny

some of these extras are really attractive

but james potter is somehow so fucking ugly why did they do that to my mans

hagrid deserves the last shot of this film, i love him, he deserves everything, that stupid sweet man

[imaginethathaikyuu]

How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr

What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^

Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))

What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.

Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.

What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.

What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….

Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)

Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.

Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).

Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.

Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.

Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”

so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D

- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]

- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd 

- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho 

- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333

- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!

- gotta love tsukishima <3

- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)

- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw 

- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more 

- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333

[moonlit-jeno]

Could you name a few of your fav fics you've found on your fic rec? Or like make a list for the 00' line members pretty pls? I would appreciate it so much that way I'd have a go to ^_^

i have an mlist on @cocoa-minho if you wanna search individually for each member, but i’ll try to make a list here too. i’m def gonna forget a bunch tho bc im an idiot but here are the one’s that i can think of rn! also every author on here has so many more amazing works than what i included so please go binge read their entire masterlists thx xx

idk what genre you’re going for so there’s a mix of everything

00 line:

@choco-mark’s a marriage of inconvenience, quarantine diaries, and you are me and everything she’s ever written um

@choerrypuffs master of all elements (it’s based off of avatar and lit i’ve reread each part at least 5 times)

the differences series, no nut november, and dick down december by @jenonctcity

k-12 series (rly rly soft and sweet and also hot and just absolutely amazing. makes me yearn for a boyfriend like nothing else) @hon3yboy

VIGILANTE/S @mistymark ITS INSANELY AMAZING, THE STORY BUILDING AND CHARACTER INTERACTIONS ARE EVERYTHING, IT’S JUST SO SO SO GOOD, I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH JUST HOW FUCKING GOOD THIS IS PLS READ THIS

the lovers (nomin) @gentledreaming and everything else she’s written

00′ line series (hot and kills me everytime i read it) + ephemeral (titanic au and also kills me everytime i read it, but esp bc the way it just absolutely fits into that era is amazing)  @jaeminsxhoe

renjun:

give in (vampire au w rly rly good character development and story building!!!!) @neostains

dust and snow (SO FUCKING GOOD but also rly sad uhhhh i may have cried for like 15 min after reading it but it’s a good pain) @valentinesicheng

quiet down (no words no thoughts head empty just renjun no but this is rly hot and the flow of it was amazing) @ncttrinities

jeno:

movie night (super soft and cute) @imjustuhhvibing

underscore (super super hot but also super funny and sweet)  @jenomark 

not like this (is soul crushing too extreme?? maybe. but it’s worth it) @gentledreaming

midnight moon (SIREN AU AND ITS AMAZING AND MAYBE ITS THE CUTEST AND BEST THING EVER??? BUT ITS SO SO SO FUCKING GOOD)  @jaeminhours

donghyuck:

honey series (ENEMIES TO LOVERS SO ITS OBV ROUGH AND AGGRESSIVE BUT ALSO SO SOFT AND SWEET AND HOT ?? IDK BUT I LOVE THE DYNAMIC) @hon3yboy

curiosity killed the cat (IDK WHAT TO SAY ABT THIS BUT THE DYNAMICS ARE INSANE I LOVE IT!!!!!) @werejusttouchingeachother

only you (one of the softest things i’ve ever read it had me smiling at me screen bc of how endearing hyuck was) @dimplyjae

jaemin:

think of you (social media au, the characters are amazing, somehow has me on the edge of my seat in anticipation to see what happens next but also snorting bc it’s rly funny, so much emotion thru just texts) @jaemallow

gravity (uhhhh i got way too invested in this story and the yearning. the pining. just ughhhhhhhh okay pls read and you’ll know what i’m talking about. insanely hot w a lot of emotions) @junguws

bluelight (THE WAY THIS HAS ME SOBBING EVERYTIME I READ IT??? IT’S LIKE A PUNCH TO THE THROAT BUT IN A GOOD WAY??? ) @lumarkle

starcrossed (refreshing and unique take on the soulmate au, one of the most unique ways i’ve seen jaemin written) @gemihyuck

yangyang:

theres not enough yangyang content so i only have one rec but it’s a rly good one!

take a break (rly fun giggly sex, absolutely adore it) @freakynct

ALSO NOT NECESSARILY 00 LINE BUT IM NEVER GONNA SHUT UP ABOUT QUARANTINE CHRONICLES BY @domjaehyun IT’S ONE OF THE BEST THINGS IVE EVER READ PLSPLSPLS GO GIVE IT LOVE IT KILLED ME THEN BROUGHT ME BACK TO LIFE

[aloera]

The ask prompt is too long to fit into an ask TT_TT but here's the doc for it docs(.)google(.)com/document/d/1yDI7iFRhOJ8ENv_IwZAo3rDSUqj80EiJROS10RzRbj4/edit

the lengths u are going for this,,, much appreciated you're very sweet!!!

prompts + answers under the cut!!

INTRODUCTION

Name: aloera

AO3 account: aloera

Fandoms you write for: bnha

How many stories have you written so far: 19

FANFICTION PROFILE

What's your favorite fandom to write for? hmm,,, used to do pjo and eah (ever after high) and eah was fun as fuck i will say!!! i think bnha is my fav mostly bc i made the most friends in this fandom :D

What's your favorite character/person to write for? bkg and kirishima!! cannot choose do not make me <3

Fic you'd want to improve? probably what we deserve? i rushed the beginning and the confession is a bit stilted imo

Hardest fic you've written? between lion and men -_- bc there is so much canon compliant stuff i've gotta write out before i get to the divergence and its HARD

Easiest fic you've written? come home to me!!! it happened so easily,,, no second guessing no writers block just vibes <33 was lovely i miss it

What would you say is the most "famous" fic you've ever written? also probably come home to me? its got the most interaction

first line of the first fic you've ever written and published. [not including my 2014 ffnet fics] "The bell rings, class starts, and Katsuki and Midoriya are inexplicably absent." from come home to me

Have you ever done a collab with another writer? yes!!!!! on two separate occasions and its so fucking fun i highly recommend trying it out its the best

Do you beta? if asked but honestly im a shit beta lmao

Do you like joining fic fests/exchanges? depends on what i have going on irl but in general yeah!!

FANFICTION PREFERENCES

Fluff or angst? definitely fluff

"OCs" or "Reader" inserts? reader inserts!! have been going ham on them recently

Blurbs or drabbles? blurbs!!

One thing you love about fanfiction i just. i really love slice of life romance?? and most media doesn't give you that bc its dedicated to plot and action and that's valid!! but fanfiction fills in the gap which is really nice

One thing you don't like about fanfiction most of the stuff i don't like is less about actual fanfiction and more about how people behave about it

What is/are your favorite fandom author/authors? IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE!!! TURN IT UP!!!

bnha: hiuythn, rae_tnub, Moniix, Ata_Lanta, wrunic, chezka, PurplePersnickety, surveycorpsejean, mahadevi, arxaris, deviance, Oceanbreeze7, MikeWritesThings, bonnia, wonhaebunny, dinosuns

voltron: hiuythn, Oceanbreeze7, DeerstalkerDeathFrisbee, arahir, dinosuns,

and honorable mention to loveclouds im not even in the haikyuu fandom i just love their fics So Much

these are just the ones off the top of my head i have so many favourites idc if i'm only supposed 2 have one!! die mad about it!!!

What is your favorite trope? secret relationship + relationship reveal til the day i die babie <3 <3

Least favorite trope? hm,,, probably just like. angst lmao i cannot stand 90% of it

A fanfiction cliché that you can't help but love? coffeeshop aus,,,, so good

Do you have a type when it comes to pairings? the otp where its like. piece of shit + himbo = love. ex. krbk, catradora, jade/beck

Favorite setting/au? hm,,, truly i cannot pick one KGKSJNHKj but i really like college aus!! and modern aus!! and roommate aus!!

Explain the meaning of your favorite line of dialogue you've written as if someone hasn't read it in context. “He doesn’t know,” Katsuki says, softly. “My timer stopped and nothing happened. He’s not mine.”

the line is from what we deserve!! it's a soulmate au where your timer counts down to the moment that you meet your soulmate!! bakugou's timer ends at USJ when he and kirishima attack kurogiri at the same time (impulsive kings <33) but kirishima's timer doesn't end until kamino because that's when he accepts himself as bakugous soulmate!! unfortunately, when bakugous timer has reached 0, he turned to see that kirishima's was still ticking and therefore believes that kirishima isn't his soulmate.

this line just,, idk. it's really sad. bakugou is such an action-driven character? if something doesn't go his way he Makes it go his way. he's got this insanely volatile quirk and he's got impeccable control of it!! but his love for kirishima isn't something that he can change and he's not going to ruin kirishima's chance of finding his own soulmate because he loves him and wants him to be happy. i really wanted to focus on how resigned he is? and how unusual that is for a character like him.

Favorite trope/genre to write? again, secret relationship with relationship reveals <33 fluff in general is my wheelhouse!!!

A trope/genre you haven't written but think would be a fun challenge? idk if this counts?? have been working on some dead dove concepts!! its super different from what i normally write so its a cool challenge

The one trope/concept you'll never touch and why probably cheating/infidelity?? it just looks,,, super difficult to write well and i don't have enough of an interest in it to try it out

Which do you prefer to write: longer or shorter fics? shorter!! low attention span gang <3

Ideal length to read? 5-10k?

Ideal length to write? 4-8k!!

How long was the longest fic you've ever written? control fraek is around 28k i think?

Have you ever written an AU? yeah!! i've done restaurant au's, soulmate au's, pro hero aus, and fantasy aus (general, not the bnha fantasy ending)

What's your favorite AU trope? hm,, probably when two people in authority are in a secret relationship? ceo's/uni professors/etc etc

Have you ever written smut? yeah!! was. difficult tho

What's your comfort genre? (the one you fall on most in writing/reading) fluff,,, hurt/comfort,,, fix-it fics with happy endings <3

If you were to start writing in other fandoms, which would they be? maybe jjk?? the characters are really cool!!!! fr i might go back to my ever after high roots i love the characters and setting so Much its so fun!!! idec if no ones into it anymore!!!!!

Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? i've had people say they saw the mention of buff hagakure and recognized it was me so. probably that skdjhnksjd

WRITING STYLE

How would you describe your style? i tend to use shorter sentences and pretty simple words i think? and i gravitate towards lighthearted concepts that allow for ensemble casts and humour!!

Describe your style in three words romcom but fanfic

Favorite words to use when writing? the word reverent!! fuckin love including it!!

Dialogue tags or no dialogue tags? (she said, he said, they said, etc) dialogue tags!!!

Favorite dialogue tag (other than said, if you use them) again idk if this counts but "they said softly" is unmatched

Long sentences vs short vs a mix short <33

What colors would you use to describe your writing? hm,,, depends on the fic i would say?? control fraek is dark green to me?? kinda like a forest at night yk?? scary but there's still life there. sugar cookies is yellow like early morning sunlight, when it rains is yellowy-orange like a caution sign. not gonna list all of them cause theres a lot its just. do u get it? the colours change based on the vibe of the fic.

What song or music genre would you use to describe your writing? think. i am constantly trying to emulate that moment at the end of wasteland baby when hozier goes "im in love/im in love with you."

What kind of metaphors do you rely on? religious metaphors my beloved <33 they're just so pretty!!! i also love comparing stuff to water for some reason?? like that ocean vuong quote thats like "what are you now?/water." it goes hard!!!

What's something you'd say is experimental in your writing at this time? definitely action!! i have,,, no idea how to write it so anything i do is really just me playing around and seeing what works and what doesn't

Do you prefer to write by hand or to type? i've tried both!! personally i prefer typing because it goes way faster but i will say that writing by hand lets me get words down when i'm going through writer's block

What is your preferred place to write (notebook, laptop, cellphone, etc.)? laptop!!

What app/apps do you use to write (word, notepad, etc.)? google docs skjdnkjh its fine on desktop but mobile is,,,,, disgusting

Do you keep a notebook or file/notes page in your phone/device for notes on your writing? ngl i just have everything organized in my drive?? one folder per fandom and then sub folders for ideas+hcs, unfinished wips, and finished fics. multichaps get sub sub folders so i can organize outlines and drafts

Do you listen to music to help you write? yeah!! playlists organized by fic vibe :D

Where do you usually go to write (bedroom, living room, etc.)? mostly in my bedroom??? but moving around to different stops helps too i think!!

How long does it usually take for you to write? again this depends on what i have going on irl, how attached i am to the idea, my mindset at the time, etc!! i am,, the least consistent person skjnhdkjh.

What's your favorite font to use when writing? times new roman my beloved

Other writing habits? sometimes i'll write in the dark?? bad for my eyes but for some reason it gets the words flowing

CONCEPTUALIZATION

How do you conceptualize your ideas? (See specific moments like they're a movie, writing specific lines in your head, don't know until you put the words on paper, etc.) i tend to get inspiration from movies, books, poems, or other fics!!! sometimes one line just makes me go oh,, i want to write something like that,,, and then it helps me create an idea that makes me feel the same way?? i did this with control fraek!!!! i wanted a scenario where bakugou was cold and calculating and i was like hm. to do that he’d have to be focusing on something important. and from there i was able to flesh out the rest of the idea.

Which comes first: the pairing or the plot? with krbk its always always the pairing,, i'll be sitting there like wow <33 i love them <33 what if one of them had amnesia <33 (which, yes, wip!!) otherwise it's usually the plot!! and i slot in characters that i feel make sense

Have you ever used a prompt? yeah!! used a prompt for wlw week 2020 and it was fun as hell

Do you write around the story around a specific scene you want to get to or do you start from a plot idea definitely the first!!!! i almost always write like,,, a super messy scene thats 90% dialogue, keep it in my head, and then write the entire fic around that one moment

Do you find that you include a projection of some part of yourself in the way you write a character? a lot of the time when i write love confessions or love in general i'll have one of the characters think or say that the other person makes their head quiet? and it's because that's what i feel whenever i'm in love?? a quiet mind. i project on characters yeah but i think most of the projection actually goes to the way that i write love

Do you research some of the things you write deeply, partially and kind of wing the rest, or play entirely by ear (in this case, go with whatever base knowledge of the subject you have)? most of the time if i do research it'll be about the setting (ex. the izakaya in to have and to hold) or if i'm having the characters interact with an object that they like. need to know how to use (me, in control fraek: google. hey google. does someone die if they get shot in the foot??? no???? awesome thank u <3)

Have you ever had an idea for a story and forgot about it? lmaoo yeah all the time i'll find like 500-2k words of concepts in my gdocs like i do. not remember this at all

Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? probably krbk secret relationship lmao

Are there concepts you've tried that turned out better than expected? yeah!! i fully thought the action in control fraek would be awful but it turned out not bad??? which im happy with

Are there concepts you've tried that turned out worse than you expected? again, what we deserve, i personally think it would have worked out better if i'd paced it slower and drawn out the pining but i. do not feel like going back to fix it so its staying the way that it is. pining is so fucking hard to do AHHHH i get so tired with it!!! im like just date already!!!!

PROCESS

How do you come up with titles? in rare occasions (literally. all my multichaps for some reason) the title comes after writing like .5 words of the first chapter im like YES this is it!!!!! sometimes i write the whole thing and pick out one line that fits (what i did with come home to me) a lot of the time i just. steal from songs or poems that i like

What's your favorite emotion to cause on your readers? i like making people happy!!!! love when people comment saying they're cheered up

What's your favorite emotion to write? lovelovelovelovelovelove

Have you ever cried or felt any emotion while reading something you've written? never cried?? but sometimes i'll rereading my hurt/comfort fics 4. yk. comfort

Do you write in order or whatever comes to you? in order!! unless i have a scene that i Need to write and i'll quickly jot it down so that i don't forget

Usual way you procrastinate while writing? ...doing asks like this, making playlists, discord, watching netflix. what don't i do smh

Do you outline or free write? i am. so shit at outlines. i mostly free write and write lil notes for stuff that i wanna add later

Do you set word goals or scene goals (scenes you want to include)? yes!! like i said i'll write loose notes for scenes that i want to add later!! it gives me something to write towards :D

What do you consider when writing your scenes? what goes into making the atmosphere and mood you want? to set a scene i do two things? the first is like,, the five senses bc that always sets the scene really well and makes it feel Real. i'll visualize stuff in my head like its a movie and write out what i would want to tell the set designer?? if the lights are low, if the space is busy, if it's supposed to exude comfort or not.

for putting forward the character's mood one thing i've found that makes a difference is sentence length!! long sentences are good for making a character seem flustered and nervous or not really in control of their emotions? good for love confessions. short sentences are good for when the character is focused on something or short on time. good for fights!!

What's something you never considered to include in your writing that you can't leave out now? def buff hagakure,,,, once i thought of it i was like. if i don't include this at least once in every single fic how could i look at myself in the mirror!!!!!! how could i face anyone!!!!

How do you start a story? establishing a fact about the character or describing the setting! option a is one single thread of gold, option b is between lion and men

How do you end a story? either by tying it back to the beginning or doing like a funny kind of closing??? option a is sugar cookies, option b is a godless society

How do you get out of writer's block? change something!! move something!! i go from typing to handwriting, moving from my bedroom to my living room, switching wips to work on something else!! i do sprints as well?? give myself like fifteen minutes to write something and sometimes 200 words opens up the way for another 2k. sometimes i'll just delete like 500 words and start fresh

Do you edit? or do you toss your writing out there? i edit!!! i'll go over it myself then send it to one or two betas (bee my beloved <33)

How do you edit? do you use spellcheck, grammar checkers, etc? bee is my grammar checker bc he is So Good with grammar. i use grammarly as well for spellcheck stuff mostly?? sometimes my edit process is just like "am i tired of looking at this!! yes <3" and then i post it

PROGRESS

Do you usually like what you write? yeah!!! i post stuff that makes me happy and that i'm fine with rereading!!! i write stuff for self-indulgence reasons first and foremost and i think my writing reflects that sjhnksj

Have you ever written something you didn't like but posted anyways? nope!! even what we deserve i LIKED even if i see a lot of room 4 improvement!! if i don't like smth it's not getting posted

Do you find yourself rereading your writing often? yeah!! the reason i wrote so much krbk secret relationship is because i loved it but i'd read all that there was so i just,, wrote more,, ngl its kinda nice being in a place where i actually like my writing bc i can write stuff that i want to see and really enjoy it!!

Can you tell us anything about your current WIP? sure!! i'm currently working on when it rains which is a fic where bakugou gets hit by a crying quirk!! i'm gonna be using it to explore So Much of all might's character and his relationships with bakugou and aizawa (and i think some people from his past!!)

Can you give us a sneak peek on your current WIP? “You did something. What the hell did you do?” Kirishima sounds pissed off. It would amuse Katsuki if he wasn’t fighting just to stay standing.

“Nothing he didn’t ask for,” Shinsou replies.

“K’ri… shima,” Katsuki croaks out. “‘S fine. Not him.”

His chest collapses back into the familiar dry heaving after that but Kirishima shuts up. He doesn’t apologize to Shinsou.

Kirishima’s a good friend, stubborn and loyal. He stands by Katsuki’s side like an attack dog, blocking him from the view of anyone ogling at his tears.

The last line you've written Ochako knows more than she'd realized. She knows enough to keep her guard up.

It’s not enough.

Open a wip. what’s the first line?

Katsuki wakes up feeling like absolute fucking shit.

INSIGHT

What's your favorite thing about writing? touched on this before but it's mainly just being able to write the things that i want to see and actually enjoy them!!! actually reread them!!!! i thought "wouldn't it be cool if bkg and kirishima owned a restaurant together" and then i wrote it and i like it enough to reread it!!!! being able to create content for myself makes me. so happy

How do you keep yourself inspired? this is gonna sound narcissistic maybe but honestly i'm just really excited about my ideas and where i'm gonna take them and the idea of "i'm gonna get to That scene" keeps me going through the entire thing. also my friends!!!! i'll talk to them about fics and their reactions keep me hyped up enough to finish!!!!

What is your favorite thing to write? just,, slice of life romance,,, stuff thats silly and makes people laugh!!

What do you think your strengths are in writing? i'm good with dialogue!! i do lil voice acting sessions with myself to make sure everything sounds natural and like it's coming from that character skhjnskj

i'm comfortable with my portrayal of love as well??? i spend a lot of time thinking about what it is exactly that i'm trying to get across and i think it turns out well!!

What are things you wish you could practice more? on one hand i wanna get better at writing angst on the other hand i dislike writing angst. do you see my issue

One way you've improved your writing since you began? characterization!! i think i've gotten better at writing characters that are all Different and bring different things to the table!!! i used to project a lot more and it would compromise the characterization because the character was like 70% me and 30% them? not to say that projection is bad but if you do it too much it just,, doesn't read like the character and from a reader's standpoint the narrative can become less compelling

One aspect of writing you're still working on? writing action!!! i. literally hate writing it but i write for a fandom about superheroes so. Unfortunately i gotta learn.

A piece of writing advice you've learned while writing saw this on another tumblr post but they said sometimes if you're struggling with a scene, the problem is five lines back. i've found that to be true!!!! sometimes u gotta delete a chunk and start a little ways back!! i did this with too busy being yours because i was stuck for Weeks and i deleted like 25% of what i had but it helped me actually finish it :D

A bit of writing advice you can't stand when people shit on show don't tell for being overrated lmao bc when u read their writing you can Tell

Something you wish you knew when you first started writing? ,,,,honestly i kind of wish i could know some of the stuff that i used to when i first started writing?? technically i'm better now but creatively i was must better when i wasn't stressing about whether anyone would like what i was writing. so i guess i wish i knew that i should keep that confidence? i kinda wish that i wasn't as insecure about other people's writing styles because i never used to be!!

Something you've learned in life that you apply in writing there's no point in feeling inferior?? writing one genre isn't better than the other. being in one fandom isn't better than being in another. the kind of language you use or the length of your paragraphs- none of that stuff like. matters. what matters is that you're having fun and happy with what you're creating!!!! enjoy other peoples writing but don't let it make you feel worse about yours :D

[colorisbyshe]

if you want to complain more about clamp I am listening :) as someone who owns many volumes of the manga in multiple languages...... I am listening. <3

okay i’m just gonna rant in a very, very long post everyone please just avert your eyes mental illness is happening

but like....... as someone who was nostalgically reading these manga to bring back some happy memories i had as a kid, discovering that these series (ccs which i remembere dfondly despite not having actually watched/read as a kid, and trc and xxxholic which i read with some of my best friends at the time) are not just deeply flawed but harbouring so much like... frankly heinous shit in them is like??? deeply hurtful to me???

and like... i could handle cardcaptor sakura being full of evil shit because i had no deep personal connection, i just wanted to better understand ccs references in tsubasa and lik better appreciate syaoran and sakura and like its 90s shoujo OVER COURSE ITS FUCKED UP! just like sailor moon and fruits basket like it’s not good but like... i can process it

trc hurts me because like... the character writing for kurogane and fai is fucking PHENOMENAL, the concept is cool and interesting and unique, it (for the most part) has great themes and the way it explores concepts like grief, trauma, sacrifice, and healing was a balm to my quarantined soul

but you can tell where they realized they literally... did not know how to resolve their plot? and it got so complicated it legit gave me headaches but at least i had kurogane nad fai and then they’re shoved to the side just for it to be revealed that syaoran... is syaoran and sakura’s son... looking to meet up with sakura... to be with her... so they can be his parents

like... wow so great to watch this beautiful relationship be explored with kurogane and fai saving each otehr from the worst part of themselves just to be sidelined for “what if those fourth graders from cardcaptor sakura where husband and wife AND mother and son but like NOT REALLY becaues syaoran is also syaoran’s own dad so is it incest or just really confusing” but no it’s both like legit when falling in love with sakura he comments on how she’s just like his mom like hello bitch? you’re 14 but i’ll still kill you that shit is WEIRD

so that wAS NOT GREAT and then it ends with THE GROUP SEPARATED AT THE END?? SO I COULDN’T EVEN GET A HAPPY ENDING like yeah maybe it’s good sakura and syaoran were separated but kurogane and fai got to stay together beacuse... fuck the incest  but like... where is my catharsis where is my happiness??

and i’m rereading xxxholic which was my favorite of trc/xxxholic as a kid and... first off, it’s boring, secondly, it thinks it’s smarter than it is an dhas contradicting themes every other chapter, but FUCK it’s so interesting but doumeki, himawari, watauniki, and yuuko don’t have half the bonds as the TRC gang and like... i still don’t know why doumeki was going so fucking hard for watanuki

but the concepts were interesting enoguh and watching watanuki grow was nice

but you can ALSO tell AGAIN clamp just got bored and didn’t know how to wrpa it up so suddenly watanuki gives up ALL HIS BONDS AND HURTS ALL HIS FRIENDS just to be reunited with yuuko??? despite the themes of the story being about how self sacrifice causes scars on others?? and that’s BAD like if you love your frieneds you don’t hurt them by undervaluing yourself??? THATS A BASIC THEME OFT HE STORY

and then they rush to pair off doumeki with a girl THEY HELPED RAISE so he can have children to stay with watanuki... himawari is written off despite her last interactions with watanuki being about them caring for each other anad choosing to stay in contact despite her curse... and like yuuko’‘s entire character is never explained she’s just like “i’m a woman who exists as a vehicle of plot in both TRC and xxxholic i will never be given depth beyond that... well also i’ll ruin watanuki’s life”

and hen the last chapters are just watching everyone grow up while watanuki is alone, never aging, helping grant wishes where he watches other immortal beings suffer and lose everyone, and it just ends with him relizing he likely won’t ever see yuuko again but he’ll keep waiting?? even though it’s been 100 yers and everyone he loves is dead??

and that shit is not good for my mental health like i feel like i have been isolated fo ra hundred years beacuse of covid watching watanuki choose it hurt edeply

like half the manga is about syaoran and sakura begging him not to vanish (also that plotline was WEIRDLY dropped) and the series ends with him effectively... vanishing a sa person and just becoming shopkeeper

how fucking depressing??

i could handle a sad ending if it had value. if it said something. if it didn’t have doumeki marrying a girl he knew since she was an abused elementary schooler while he was like 17. ESPECiALLY when IN THE PANELS REVEALING IT it weren’t like “atcually neither of them love each other they love watanuki but it’s fine” like HUH????????? FOR WHY

and ive really had to grasp the reason why there’s so much fucked up shit (incest, pedophilia) in those series is core to CLAMP’s messages accross all their mangas about soulmates nad how about love can triumph over everything

and like using such a PURE message to be like “if an adult is in love with a child and they’re soulmates, it’s to be” is so fucking evil

like they’ll tip toe around kurogane and fai, yukito and touya, doumeki and watanuki, and all the gaybait that i KNOW is in their other series because i’ve grown up seeing shit like tokyo babylon and legal drug and all their other dropped manga

because gay peopl ebeing soulmates is a wink and a nod

but ADULTS WITH CHILDREN THEY ARE IN CHARGE OF??? MOTHER AND SON MAYBE??? oh that’s fine they’re REAL soulmates who will go against TIME AND DIMENSION MAGIC ITSELF to be in love

like...............................

gay people are second class characters compared to pedos and incest... does it get worse than that? like besides emotionally destroyed by the sad endings, i get that shit too?

it hurts on a deeper level like feels like a betrayal and i’m kind of really sad i revisited something i enjoyed so much as a kid (even when i didn’t understand wtf was going on, because i was literally reading it at the same time my friend was and rushing) andd discovered this like... deep rot inside it

i could have continued to remember it fondly but now it’s just like... reaching the last bite of cake and being told it was made with maggots like... well i already ate it all...

there’s no point reading clear card or the unfinished tsubasa/xxxholic sequels because they’ve already ruined themselves like they can’t fix it

kurogane and fai still won’t be allowed to be together. watanuki still outlived everyone who ever loved him for a mother figure that can never come back. cardcaptor wrote off the fourth grader engaged to hre teacher but like... sakura’s dad is still a preadator

like... what do i do with these left over feelings then?

i’ll be over it in a dya but like for tonight i really do feel unwell

okay thank you i got it out in one post i am processing the feelings

i am gonna cry about watanuki being alone tho

[iiasha-archived]

genshin anon! oops turns out i totally forgot to respond lol. yeah the sacrificial is nice. ive got the bow, claymore, and catalyst. almost have 2 r5 catalyts as well.... oo that's nice! yeah xiao has kind of turned into my not used character as well which is kind of sad. i love him so much. but hu tao doing 30k+ crit up to 50k is uh... going well for me one might say. and yeah i also think the rate theyre doing things is okay. people constantly are at the game for not having end game content

lmaoo don’t worry about responding!! feel free to absolutely ghost me i’ll totally understand hehe <3

(2/5) but like.. the game isnt a year old yet. like half the game isnt even out yet. i get theres not a whole lot to do ar 45+ but :/ its a gacha game so its not really supposed to be a play for 8 hours a day thing. although i am torn on that. it is a gacha game but plays and acts like a 'proper' game so i get where everyone is coming from in that aspect. i am so in love with venti. mostly wanted him to collect everyone and for spiral abyss but damn i use him CONSTANTLY and i dont think i could

(3/5) ever not use him now. sucrose is great though! def try to get here she is such a great support! zhongli is so useful though haha. he kind of just fits in wherever. i cant wait for childe i so hope i get him. im saving up all these windblume primos for him haha. and hoping to get rosaria in the process (my pole arm team will almost be complete). yeah the windblume has been great! the STORY THOUGH. it made me so happy? haha. loved seeing all the characters again. and it was just a sweet

(4/5) story :'( the games are pretty cool too! im not a big fan off the freefall one though. the other two are great. and peculiar wonderland! that one is a lot of fun in coop! i kind of really want them to keep the dandelions floating around in mondstadt? they look so nice. oh nice! yeah polearms are fun haha. i used to use a lot of claymores but idk, im just not overly fond of how slow they are? plus none of them really -vibe- with me. xinyan is my fave out of them though. i just walk around

(5/5) with my faves and hope for the best :') chongyun and xingqiu bestest friends <3 that sounds funny ill have to be xingqui when i do chongyuns story quest lol. still havent done any of those but yeah its nice that they do let you skip what youve already done lol. yeah rosaria did show up in the windblume festival which i figured she would. got to remind everyone about her before she is released. did make me like her a bit more honestly. cant wait to (hopefully) get her! she seems like fun!

R5 DAMN.... i think my highest is like R2 lmao again weapons are like the last thing i invest in ajdfklaj i have like. two good swords and 2 good claymores and that’s it. my poor catalysts and bows.......

30-50k crit omg..... i only JUST got the achievement for like i think 20k+ damage with xiao the other day and it was during peculiar wonderland with the plunging/crit buffs LMAOOOO i am not a numbers type of gal </3 

yeah i’ve honestly seen a lot of gacha games that like fucked around before discontinuing and not making a dent in the story... not saying that i want that to happen to genshin of course (knock on wood) but just the rate they’re doing things is definitely fine lmao. and yeah sometimes i don’t even bother playing every day if i just don’t feel like it adfjklajd sure i’m losing primogems but also like. i’m tired bro lmao idk how people can spend hours every single day without just spending a copious amount of money on it. 

but it does definitely feel like more than a gacha game for sure. botw was popular for a reason and i must say genshin ripped it off well LMAO. ughhhh despite what i said i keep pulling for venti and I’VE GOTTEN NOELLE IN EVERY SINGLE 10 WISH THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS FJADKLFJSA i did get keqing for my pity though who i did also really want though so!!!! i guess i can be happy with that lmao although i wish at least 1 of my noelles was a sucrose or something...

and yes! even if it was just brief cameos i’m glad they brought a lot of characters in; really helps build the world especially seeing the friendships between certain characters! i know we got a spoiler in the trailer but i was so excited to just see like. diluc/kayea/rosaria together hahaha. and razor and bennet are so cute!! i think people already knew they were friends from their voicelines? but actually seeing them hang out together/interact really solidifies it. 

oh nice i’m not the only one who isn’t a fan of the freefalling one LMAO the others were a lot of fun tho <3 and yeah the dandelions are definitely really pretty!!!

ahh yeah i think with claymore users i tend to really focus more on their elemental skills/burst than them actually fighting lmao. like with chongyun at least he has a pretty fast cooldown compared to how long his skill lasts and just switch out with another character meanwhile. polearms are fun as well and xiao has been GREAT but i think i was also off put by how little damage my xiangling was doing when i first tried out polearms lmaooo

chongyun and xingqiu are really the best i love them so much... people keep comparing them to buzzfeed unsolved which i honestly haven’t really seen much of but it makes SO much sense especially since their whole thing is like. chongyun looking for evil spirits and xingqiu giving him shitty leads jasdkflsa. 

also idk if you’ve seen this but apparently the tassels they wear on their visions are friendship tassels they gifted each other and JDAFKLAJSKLFDSJ THAT’S SO CUTE GODDD

and yeah!!! again with the diluc/kayea/rosaria group i really want a storyline surrounding those 3 specifically lmao they seem so fun. i actually didn’t realize the similarities between kaeya and rosaria are until they were put together but aside from kaeya being more. idk flirty/extroverted lmao they actually have sort of similar like. idk. vibes? roles? jobs? way about doing things? and cryo users ofc

[spotsupstuff]

🥺 vibe check my baby shithead?

bless... its my sibwing time...

Why I like them:

what the fuck is there not to like about them, lets be honest. their personality is unique when compared to other bvs. i lowkey always hoped id get to see a bv that would be more bold, angry, just more sharp towards the world. most of bvs that ive seen before joining the creating part of the fandom were soft shy kids that didnt want to hurt anybody. its valid to characterize bc like that, but it was everywhere. lost was like the polaris in the entirety of the fandom. learning about them was refreshing, comforting, it felt and still feels safe to consider and think about them. they feel real, i feel like i could meet them on the street in a playground and become friends with them. you made them so real and important to me. ive said this plenty in the server, but theyve helped me through a lot of hard times. i was too sad or anxious or scared to come out of bed? i thought about them interacting with broken and i felt better. i was in a lot of pain? thinking about them helped distracting me and getting me through a lot of it. im so so thankful for their existence and even more so for your willingness to interact, rp and vibe with me. i love lost so much.

Why I don’t:

their clinginess sometimes worries me. they are valid in it, but clingy people generally make me Slightly uncomfy bc i have times where id rather not be touched and i have trouble speaking up because i dont wanna offend or hurt. broken is the same and i fear the day they will have to disappoint lost by turning away a hug or a cuddle session. the mixture of natural understandable clinginess and anger can result in a sort of manipulation. unintentional, but still manipulation

Favorite episode (scene if movie):

,,,ill be mildly self-indulgent and say that the scene where them and broken adopted each other, overlaying with the morning after, is perhaps my favorite thing ever. BUT!! i liked the scene with them shunning ghost out of oros hut. it established their thoughts and determination to Keep things important to them away from people that had hurt them.

Favorite season/movie:

the ENTIRE FUCKIN FIC THATS ABOUT THEM GETTIN FROM THE ANCIENT BASIN TO ORO. bro ive checked ao3 like every morning when the second chapter was still in the wip bin, i just couldnt wait for it kgjslkgjsldkk the amount of details to the struggles and the size of torment expressed through your words was so so real and i couldnt get enough of it. im incredibly thankful for that fic and for all the feelings it stirred up in me wee heart

Favorite line:

”I mean you’re a clown. do I need to say it slooooowwwweeerr?” the beginning of an age...

“don’t ever pull Us together like that, ever again” theres a lot to unpack here and boy, im keepin the entire suitcase right in my lap and i WILL think and dive deep into it with my thoughts

Favorite outfit:

theyve got One but they sure be rockin in and i -cocks designer gun- have Some ideas for that second cloak that net would make them so i Hope that will follow close behind their og look

OTP:

this lil creachure is fifteen, i only ship them with safety and parental/platonic love and care

Brotp:

them and purl!!! but also them and hornet, even though its not as close of a relationship, it makes me very happy that they arent completely shut off from each other. that lil short story they shared about their first encounter with cain instinct committed by hornet has been inserted into my mind forever out of the RAN universe canon... them and broken for obvious reasons, them and net (ive been LOOKIN for an AGE AND A HALF NOW SO HARD at that relationship) and tbh??? them and junior has been on my mind a Lot lately. ever since the first doodles of junior hiding them with wings in the among us au, ive been considerin n thinkin of scenarios

Head Canon:

-thunk emoji- hmm... theyll never be too great of a flyer. they will be able to do more than just flap once or twice to get over some distances, definitely, but i feel like they will forever prefer ground over the skies. some minor hcs: ,,,they might pick up some sort of sewing from net in the bverse, maybe; their hand writing will/does look like yours; one day, they will do something that will make a giant difference in something important, completely by themself

Unpopular opinion:

i dont fahcken kno how to do these with yalls characters what hte fuck

A wish:

i wish radiance didnt fuck them up so much during Those years. they deserve to get tall and strong, capable of their dads nailarts, big enough to wield a bigass nail like him and suplex broken

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen:

this is an incredibly unlikely scenario to happen cuz i know you dont like thinkin about the ultimate end of people and characters, but my biggest fear is that one day they will come back from a hunt or a visit to a cold body in their dads bed, with eyes closed to never open again, not giving them the chance to even say goodbye.

5 words to best describe them:

angry, worried, caring, gentle, afraid

My nickname for them:

sibwing... lil star (just like u heehoo), sometimes i think about them as simply “safety” or “comfort”

[savnofilter]

hey guys, i just wanted to speak up about something because i have been getting questions if i was well and stuff and im not really sure these days. mainly because i have become uncomfortable on this blog.

and i beg that people who dont like me, please do not spread things about me please or this because i thought i owe this to my followers.

the reason as to why i feel uncomfortable is because it really dawned upon me that being here doesnt make me happy anymore. and you could see in how flat my writing has become, or how my behavior often changes from happy to sad/low in a quick second.

and since after the summer, being on here has been almost terrible for me. like i use to have many friends, many people i talked to or felt like i created a bond with a lifetime, just kind of up and left me in the dust. while i finally took the time to focus on me for once, they used it against me, they got mad at me and its just hard to keep quiet about since it has always been my goal to talk about my feelings and now i dont think i can anymore, as to why im writing this to you guys tonight..

i will not get into depth (or specific) about it because i feel like the more i try to explain myself, the more twisted it becomes. and instead of helping me, it hurts me.

over the few months, i found when i was taking breaks to be happier. 

and its not the thought of you guys, it was more of like the lingering feeling of the way i was treated by people lingering on my blog. and im afraid if i feel like this still holds truth, i will be leaving this blog sooner or later.

in truth, i feel like ive been mistreated or even to the point where my feelings were so construed that it felt like i have been gaslighted over and over and over again. and honestly i am not as mentally or emotionally mature as many people on here, and some of them know that but it was never regarded.

im sad that this experience has come to this, because i really loved interacting, interacting with everyone and sharing my stories, but with the bad experiences on here has even turned my love/passion for writing down -- and even watching anime. i feel reminded every time i see certain blogs all over my feed, or like “hey im safe with these group of people” then they would pop up again. i felt like im some sort of villain or like an unintelligent-idiot who cant think for themselves. and while people who brainlessly follow those people can blindly hate me is fine, because i will never change who i am for anyone. ever. and i hate having to make posts like these because i feel bad for being so angsty and not being the sav that you guys know because while the brand “savnofilter” or “sav” is an extension of me, i sometimes feel so detached because of how shut out ive fell in this fandom for like 5 months now.

and i sincerely apologize to any new followers, i use to not be this down all the time but it really has been brought to my attention that the only social media that has heightened my anxiety, my depression, and even a part of illnesses i thought went away has resurfaced all because of what has happened associated to this blog.

whether it be being shut out and begging for help from the people i thought would be friends, or that i was kicked to the curve simply because i was not in the right state of mind and basically told me it was my fault for being that way.

and when it was fun, when i had friends it never felt like a chore for me on here. but as i lose support like that, it just hurts even though i have someone who stays beside me all the time. once you lose that, that, ground you start to compare yourself, like normal human nature i think. i started too look at my blog and be like “why arent i getting as much as before, what am i doing wrong, what is so bad about my stuff thats good with theres”. and part of the factor was that its odd, because it wasnt even a place of jealousy. it was one of, how did i fall to be so unimportant? so... immaterial. and it was like, each writer i fell out with, everyone just followed them and im left here trying my best to fill in their spots because i missed having that friend group, or friends with me. the only who really cared for me even with the biggest arguments and hoenstly it was because they were the only the one that cared for me. and i am not trying to cause discourse so please do not contact other people about this.

and as much as i stay at this point to irk the people who want me gone, i feel like the subtle unintentional (or intentional) bad vibes being brought to me is choking me up. and its doing well.

it just, it was so odd being treated like actual shit. like dog dooky shit. like if i was the poop on the sidewalk that you walk around and wonder who fucking took that massive shit, shit. and i was afraid to speak up about it because i was afraid of the backlash id get for having fucking feelings. 

from someone who went through some shit when i was younger, and built this barrier, to being repeatedly told over and over again that my feelings are invalid, to have people to tell me “i wont do that too you” and then do it to me just made me grow as a person. or die as a person. im not sure yet.

not only was it a mixture of people leaving me for shitty reasons, it was how stupid this fandom got. yeah, stupid. completely idiotic. of course there are people who sense-ful(?) and i love you a lot for it. but like ive said before, its unfair, there is no love like there use to be. people arent how they use to be. people put on a show, but once behind close doors its completely different. and if youre thinking of anyone in specific, youve got some shit to reevaluate. 

i was so scared to talk about it before because i was so scared at the backlash id get because i was so tired for being the hurt one and being called the bad guy. and im not blind to me being a bitch, but when i feel like ive done something im upfront about it. im rambling but this happens when i finally let my thoughts out.

and if ive been truthful, ive fallen out of my routine with meeting up with my therapist which may one of the reasons i let it run on this long without really getting a clear conscience. and like ive said before, i had thought it had to do with my life but honestly the only grief i get is being on here. 

to be honest, i have projects and requests i really want to complete before i even leave. so maybe its a while before i leave, maybe if it gets too much i’ll just go. i do not know. but 2020 is the year i finally want to take my own health over everyone else before i did before. and even with how hurt i am, i still hold so much love for these people. so much. but ive always been too loyal.

i am sorry for this sorrowful note, but i do not know how much longer i will stay. i love you all, have a blessed night.

[localspirit]

Ah I’m interested in all! I assume beginning to look into spirituality will help me in the future when it comes to spirits and such! I have communicated with a ghost/ghosts before so I think I’m naturally a little more ‘open’ to spirits than the average person but I don’t really know how this works.

under the cut bc its so long!

wow thats AWESOME!!! ive been interested in spirits, spirituality, some aspects of religion like djinn for as long as i can remember but wasnt able to communicate with spirits until recently.

pendulums do you own a pendulum? it doesnt have to be anything fancy, mine ended up being a fake crystal i got from a friend that was on a necklace. out of boredom and slight curiosity i asked a yes/no question and it just started swinging with the right answer... it was really freaky!! some people believe pendulums are a scam, some think that its your arm unconsciously moving with the right answer, some think that its you tapping into your third eye clairvoyance, and some think its an angel communicating thru it. mine ended up being an angel! it took a very long time bc i had to go thru the alphabet but my pendulum uses he/him prns and his name is azhu. he says hes not a guardian angel or an angel sent by a higher power. pendulums have their own way on saying yes/no, so if you ever do get one, make sure you know what its swinging means! azhu goes left/right for no, up/down for yes, and in circles or unsure. he's predicted things like my (unpredictable, unstable) health and what college i'll end up going to, and when. pendulums can also 100% be used to communicate with spirits and djinn- that's my main form of communication!

spirits with spirits i kinda jumped into it rlly fast. remember that phase in 2016 where people on yt were like 'i bought a HAUNTED DOLL from EBAY... SCARY 3AM OUIJA'?? i suddenly remembered that. and was like... lemme have a look here. i really did just go on ebay and look at haunted dolls and thats where i met my 'first' spirit vessel i was connected to. you dont really question it, if you find yourself completely drawn into a spirit doll/toy/jewelry piece (aka vessel), theyre calling out to you. it was mean to be! spirits can be 'evil or good', but i prefer the terms 'positive and negative'. a spirit can be positive but very sad and troubled and have a bad temper. spirits can be 'evil' and seem like the sweetest things ever. to be sure, i ask my pendulum which one they are. it turns out i owned three spirit vessels and i didnt even know until my pendulum told me!! i was very attached and affectionate to them (theyre old thrifted/collectable toys) to the point where i found it a bit strange. the spirits explain it. and btw, just because a spirit has a vessel, doesnt mean theyre inside of it or anything... idk think of it as an anchor or something. they can wander around, but they can always find their way back to their vessel. a spirit can have a vessel for 100 years, or pick a new vessel very frequently. asking for activity right away annoys the hell out of them. i find asking 'how did you die?' right away a bit rude too... its like going up to a stranger with a large scar on their face shouting 'what happened to your face?'. i always ask the spirit 'is it okay to ask about your death?' before going any further. some spirits show great activity, some dont show much at all. never force it out of them! they arent a show. they have feelings and stuff! if you wanna know more about spirits i recommend watching videos from ppl with ACTUAL INFORMATIVE vids on their spirit dolls, not just the 'scary 3am ouija’ vids. i also recommend going through ebay and just typing in 'spirit vessel' instead of 'haunted doll', and just taking the time to read their descriptions. all spirits have a story!

djinn im pretty new to djinn myself! some ppl on the stricter side of islam swear that all djinn are evil and work for the devil which isnt true at all... there are lots of types of djinn, most i dont know myself!!! most djinn seek a relationship with humans, platonic or romantic. there are khodam (friendliest afaik, 'grant wishes' to humans), marid (my djinn friend! works with water. possibly a mermaid? srs.), ifrit (mischievous, want to see humans suffer), shiatan (works for the devil i think), etc. this is where things get a little hard to believe so pls pls do your research. a lot of djinn conjurers and people who work with djinn claim that djinn can be vampires, elves, succubi, faeries, mermaids, 'aliens'/starseeds, etc... which i think is SUPER cool. hundreds of people who have worked with them swear by it. people say djinn helped with the egyptian pyramids. they have their own appearance they can tell you like height and eye color, and preferences to anything. most really do want to help out humans, i wouldnt say GRANT them, but definitely wave off any negativity coming your way and to shove you on the right path. they can be really protective. king djinn can have hundreds of thousands of djinn working for them. DEFINITELY do your own research, a lot of it before having a djinn attached to a vessel you own, or purchasing a vessel from a conjurer. i really do recommend just taking your time one day to scroll through etsy when you search 'djinn vessel' and just taking the time to read their descriptions, and LOOKING AT THE REVIEWS. i was skeptical and then i saw '85 reviews under item, 5/5 stars'. i read every single review, every description, everything i can. u can learn so much from peoples experiences. it really is amazing!! 

just to be clear i didnt conjure my djinn myself ! i contacted a conjurer on etsy when i was ready and she literally had him attached to my ring in SECONDS. it was crazy. you can find her here! 

misc a big part of spirituality is learning about your chakras, unblocking them, and eventually opening your third eye. there are lots of informative videos on chakras, and im still tryna open my third eye myself! i meditate every few days and have been close to astral travel (which some spirits can interact with you through! dreams too. theyre called 'dream walkers'.). i REALLY recommend binaural beats videos for meditation, not just rain noises or something. like this . there are thousands of videos for this kinda stuff... take the time and find one that works best for you! if you need ANY clarification or anything just lmk because i love talking about this stuff and im sure i left lots out okay!!! i also have a spirituality page you can find here!!

[houseki-no-suffering]

Why do you like cinnabar so much? I personally can't really stand them but I'm still happy they're finally content with life! Cinnabar is my Cinnababy, no matter how cruel they are to my other and more baby, phos.

this is very hard for me to explain in a logical way.

most people will think it���s a given, but ive read and heard enough polarized opinions to avoid taking my chances so, before we start, here’s a disclaimer: im perfectly aware that cinnabar’s character has flaws, that their canon relationship with phos isnt healthy, that they made mistakes and will probably keep on making mistakes (and ive written a number of posts about it). 

now that we’ve got this over with, i’ll tell you that i dont really know why i like cinnabar so much. sometimes a character just vibes with you (look at me, using cool kids vocabulary) and bam, theyre a fave.

as a start, since chapter 2 and episode 1, i liked the way they were introduced in the story: the character’s design, their theme (shinsha’s theme is one of the best songs in the ost, come on), their personality. the way they kept phos and everyone else away but still cared about them was so bittersweet. it made me want to hug them but it also got me thinking about gem society: why is cinnabar so isolated? why no one cares? how did it get to this?

they’re so similar to phos, too, and the more i grew to like phos the more i grew to like cinnabar and their interactions. they had this unique chemistry that other gems in the show didnt have, it was more nuanced and complex than the other relationships we could see in the series and that too got me thinking about gem society. 

they were both outcasts after all, it was very clear that they were trying to battle loneliness and find a sense of purpose in different ways and that was interesting (and sad ofc, but hey this is hnk).

but cinnabar is an independent character from phos and i love how ichikawa kept highlighting that as she showed their relationship deteriorate with time. in the end, cinnabar makes their own choices and by doing so they show character growth.

it took me a while to appreciate cinnabar as much as i do now and their newfound independence played a big part. they became their own character and in doing so they became much more interesting. theyre moving, growing, changing, making mistakes, thinking about things in a world where no one ever thinks about anything and those who do are either outcasts or betrayers or both.

i also suppose i see myself in cinnabar more than in any other character, and it’s very rare for me to find a character and go ‘oh woah, theyre just like me’ so that was a plus. sometimes i just want to shake some sense into their head cause im like ‘ive been through this, i know why youre doing this and it’s not healthy, you dumb rock. just speak out’

i like cinnabar’s personality: they’re smart, they’re brilliant, theyre anxious and shy, they’re avoidant, selfless, rude, self loathing, secretive but at the same time so easy to read, they give great advice and look complicated but they really just wanted one thing, to be loved, and this speaks so much about the problems gem society has.

cinnabar’s character is also testament to the fact that you have to create your future with your own hands, you cannot project your hopes on someone else, wait for a saviour, cry about your failures and misfortunes and hope everything goes well. you have to act.

now, phos is a much better example of this, of course, but i appreciate cinnabar’s attempt at this, even if i dont condone their methods: communication is essential and cinnabar cannot communicate sincerely for the life of them. 

i also like to speculate about cinnabar’s past, all the small moments we didnt see on screen and that led them to take on night patrolling: were they friends with antarc? with other gems? with gems that were abducted? i like to empathize with shinsha, get in their shoes and try to understand why they acted a certain way, why they said a certain thing, because 90% of cinnabar’s decisions happen offscreen, 90% of their processing happens in their head and writing character metas is one of my favorite things to do, as you all probably have noticed.

complex thought process, lots of things left unsaid, flaws, mistakes, an attempt to change, cool personality… idk, i just like them. please shinsha stans come to my aid cause im sure i forgot something but its so hard to make this post into something coherent

[moontours]

Did you like the Strikeforce comic? I thought the story was kinda lame but the team interactions made up for it. It felt like a very character driven fun book that didn't get too serious and I'm kinda sad it got cancelled so quickly.

i agree with pretty much this entire assessment JHSBDADJSADB i thought the plot was like pretty much non-existent or like it was so lame i didnt really care for it at all BUT the team is pretty much one of the best line ups ive ever seen and its filled w characters that i loved and the interactions btwn these characters was SO good bc like who in the world ever thought there would be a team like this JEHBHJASBDAHJ i wish it kept going bc it was a place for me to see a lot of my favs :(