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#ive been thinking abt this for over a month dudes. over a MONTH
opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#thats me in the corner. thats me in thr spotlight. rocking from side to side and not contributing to the conversation#which is to say. i made it to thr lab get together with an old lab mate. i really truely did not think i would#i was like 20min late bc of the crying and hyperventilating over a 6min drive down the road#i sorta freaked out while driving too. and almost turned around. its just that i kno i havent been sleeping enough and got overwhelmed#but i made it there. and i dont think i looked like id been crying but i probably looked a bit blank faced and miserable#as i rocked from side to side for like 2hrs listening to ppl talk. i enjoyed it exactly as much as i expected. it was good to see the guy#again but i just dont connect in group gatherings idk. im glad its done. also fucking we were sitting there and a group comes in and whos#in that group?? someone i have avoided seeing for like a loooong time. the guy who tried to be in a relationship with me back when i 1st#started as a grad student. i say relationship. i was explaining to him why i couldnt do any sort of romantic e tanglement and he was very#firm abt not wanting a relationship. and im like bro im explaining u why no romanticly adjacent thing is gonna work. u literally asked me#to physically hold ur hand thru this. u r somehow more emotionally invested in this than me and also are telling me that u just wanna fuck#me. so like u r not slick. whatever. it was so fucking stressful at the time. which i feel bad abt bc it wasn't really his fault#i was just less self aware so i didnt kno i have bad awareness in the moment. like i dont kno a lines been crossed until a week later when#im laying on thr floor falling apart. so like i wish him the best. didnt kno he was still around. hopefully this doesnt trigger stress#dreams. all this to say i was very fucking tense. and when i got back in my car i was like shaky and panting lol#idk looking back its just such a weird situation with that dude. if i was anyone else it woudlnt have been a big deal but#my brain just doesn't process physical touch right. so now ive got these horrible touch memories that like on paper r literally nothing#but for me they were so unfathomablly awful when i 1st aquired them. i literally could not deal with any romantic stuff for like a month#bc it would like trigger me. now thst its been like 3 years its not bad tho. just like gives me thr ick but i dont get#stuck in the memories too much. its so dumb. whatever. point is im all sore now from sitting all tense haha#unrelated
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nonbinarynerevar · 1 year
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one thing about me is im sooo aromantic until im not
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wonyrs · 11 months
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fluster
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enha hyungs x fmr gnr non-idol au, est. relationship warnings food wc 939 + library #
‘ enha hyung as ur 'homies' ! REQ
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lee heeseung
" ayyy how u been bro?"
plays along and even replaces his normal petnames with something he'd usually call the members but NEVER you (until now)
um... hello? where is the endearing "why'd u call me that babe 😢☝️?" where is the begging for a kiss? where is the desperate attempts at pda we were hoping to see? this wasn't the plan at all (like... at ALL)
he tries to hide his laugh when u give him the stink eye and keeps up his act
even going as far to pretend like he isn't seeing ur hand inching closer to his and lifts it up to 'brush' the hair from his face
second attempt at holding his hand ended up with him fishing his phone out from his pocket and showing u an extremely!!! hilarious... insta reel.
ur plan has reversed; instead of him dying for ur affection, its now u trying to stop him from treating u like any other person before u physically cannot take it anymore
"ok man. i see how it is man. bye man." this is ur cue to stand up, run away and never look back for ur own emotional sake
if it weren't for heeseung GRIPPING onto ur shirt with the most gobsmacking laugh u've heard coming out his mouth, to the point tears were trsiling down his face from how hard he's laughing
"wait- wait [name]! you started it, come back!"
park jongseong
" how are u doing BABE? how's life BABE? "
mommm [name]'s acting weird again, i think the heat's getting to them
he acts like he can't see ur hand in the air and continues to kiss u right on the lips (but he still moves ur arm down for safety measures)
"what's good, dude?" "baby, who are u talking to? it's only us in this room lol 🤨"
u try again with dapping him up but immediately he turns around and oh so suddenly the wall is soooo interesting
for the whole hour u mess with him and call him 'bro, dude, gang' and shit like that while he just sneakily rolls his eyes and goes on with his day- while most likely wondering what on earth was wrong w u
he'd be in the kitchen washing the dishes while ure trying to hold his hand and have it dap urs up
but is he paying attention?
lmfao no
he goes on with his day since he knows u cant go another hour without his love and so he has nothing to worry about (unless u actually DO go for another hour, then he's actually going to believe something's wrong with u)
eventually u give up and go back to slumping on his back. the months u've spent together gave jay a clear understanding on ur antics and gave him some time to prepare for anything u had up ur sleeve
" tired already? an hour, new record babe. good job"
sim jaeyun
" why are u doing this to me "
the moment u refuse his hug and opt for a more... different greeting, jake malfunctions for a bit
he trys to hug u again but u extremely remain still
whines complains when u keep up the 'homeboy' act
"i swear we acted like a normal couple yesterday, did i make u mad pookie? 😥" sneaks in some of the petnames u absolutely LOATHE just for a reaction
hates when u replace the lovely kiss-and-hug interactions with dapping him up like a BRO
most likely complained to the enha gc abt ur 'unearthly' behaviour (u get his ass on that later) and cries that he might never see the old u again
the urge to drown him in all the love u've kept in since u met up is eating u alive But watching him practically cry over ur feet is helping u out a wee bit
"chat this is absolutely hilarious what are we thinking" "WOW! Hahaha so funny!! Such a kneeslapper! can u stop now 😐."
Hes dead serious when he says this btw Like full on eye contact with furrowed eyebrows, but a small pout is resting on his face
he was fine with the joke at first but then he just got more eager for ur touch as the hours went by
u stare for a bit before engulfing him in the biggest hug ever while peppering his face with an abundance of smooches
"finally! u dont know how long ive waited for this"
park sunghoon
" did u eat something funny? "
just stares. nothing else, just stares
eventually u have to drop ur arm because the silence just got too awkward
was he mad at u? (ofc not) Maybe hoonie just needed to load and take a bit to process the scene in front of him
"i dont think u should be doing this to your boyfriend, babe. it doesn't really fit the loving couple vibe yk 🤖"
even when sunghoon continues to act like everything's normal u keep on persisting with acting like close-bro-friends
... only to be met with the most baffled face ever.
he wonders if ure roleplaying as some character or just genuinely going insane
decides to go along with whatever you're doing and continue the day as normal as it can get
when u get tired of the lack of attention, u drop the act but unconsciously refer to him as bro
muscle memory(ish) fr
"dude can you at least act interested?" "um excuse me? what'd u just call me"
HELLO. where was this dumbfounded hoon when u need him?
ure actually laughing atp because he doesn't even look like he knew what was wrong
the whole time u kept up w the joke, he didn't even look like he cared UNTIL u got tired and talked in ur normal tone
"don't ever say 'dude' in a serious tone like that. scared me, babe."
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@ wonyrs 2023
note sorry anon for not taking ur request after like 2 weeks... i've needed some motivation to write SORRY.. also maknae version is next :> requests open!
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cannibalismyuri · 1 year
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People aren’t obligated to reblog your fanfics if they don’t enjoy the writing. You don’t get as much attention because you’re not as known. You haven’t been publishing as long as the “big authors” you pretend to love but then bash them immediately afterwards. It sucks, but you can’t buy people’s affection. You pretend to be more humble than everyone else but then get pissed so easily because you don’t have bragging rights.
i never said everyone has to enjoy my writing. also the Thing is; these big authors have been publishing for longer yeah !! and their writing is absolutely marvelous and i genuinely adore them. but. they also are popular bc they're seen as Better than other creators and put on a pedestal. which is both uncomfortable for them and Highly discouraging for others. and this is due to a cliquey mindset. it Is. as much as u like to pretend it isn't, it rlly rlly is. people can be just friends. there is nothing wrong with supporting ur friends' work more or being more invested in ur friends' work. the problem lies in the fact that many people just disregard other rlly talented creators in favor of the already popular ones (who are popular for a reason. their art / fics / wtv Are really good and i read their stuff too! not trying to put them down here, just trying to lift other people up) which makes for a fandom that is going to die out. and dont u fucking dare bring my fics and my engagement and me into this. maybe i was petty abt that before and i acknowledge that. but i haven't made a single post abt how my fics are getting less engagement in Months. the post i did make and the one ur probably so butthurt abt wasn't even initially abt cliques. it was just saying that we need to rb more and be more vocal of our support of creators in the tags or - wherever. NOT underrated / underappreciated / smaller / less popular creators. i was Very general abt it. creators. period. the talk of cliques came into play when i peer reviewed someone's tags on that post. bc they were extremely real and the problem of less vocal support affects "popular" creators too! ive been noticing that they're also getting less engagement. but mostly the people affected by it are creators in the fandom with no prior popularity. and it is an actual issue. also when the actual fuck have i ever bought someone's affection?? im too broke for that, my dude, i struggle to pay rent most months. and i've Not acted humble or holier than thou. the reason i have so many moots and friends is bc im a genuinely nice person who wants to support and uplift EVERYONE in this fandom. i do have personal beef with people, but im civil to Everyone. thats the reason i have friends. unlike you, i dont send anon hate bc im butthurt over one (1) post <3 hope that fucking helps <3 also the post wasnt even abt ME. bc i genuinely dont give a fuck abt people seeing and liking my writing anymore bc i have Grown Past That and just... adopted a give no fucks mindset. the post was abt the fandom slacking and not appreciating creators (PERIOD.) enough. it was never abt me. also bragging rights? babe nobody's bragging abt how they get more interaction. that's rude asf and entirely out of the question. and those popular writers ur talking abt who Could brag if they wanted to DON'T. bc they aren't despicable human beings who love to put others down. i'm Friends, or at the very least, friendly moots w the writers ur talking abt. and im not trying to put them down. im trying to lift other people up, which is smth u just Don't understand apparently. i even contributed in a whole ass event to shine light on talented, less popular writers in the fandom. bylerficrecweek? u might ive heard of it. it helped, or i like to Think it did, with helping people branch out, but the problem wasn't completely solved. people who are equally as talented as the already popular creators have talked abt their experience with engagement in the exact same post that ur so pissed abt. im going to put tags from various people under the cut so that u can see exactly how much people are affected by the prominent clique problem in the byler fandom. hope u have a good day and u wanna kiss me so bad it makes u look stupid 😚
THIS is the post im talking abt in question, the og post along with denise @bylertruther 's tags. i'm going to be putting screenshots of people's tags on this post with due credit. (to any of the people featured here : if u want me to remove ur tags feel free to say so!)
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via @holyvirgilscriptures
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via @runninguplenorahills
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via @unwisewizard
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via @apatheticlexicographer
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via @fireflywitch
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via @hawkwidows
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via @sandinmybed
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via @katimanki2
ANDDDDD thats it! hope u fucking realized that i was speaking generally and also Many people face this problem. kiss my ass 💋
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mell0bee · 6 months
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tagged by @candiedjellybean thank u dude!!! im p sure ive done this tag sometime last year so will be interesting to see if my answers have changed
Are you named after anyone? unfortunately, st. brigid of ireland, but also apparently it's a name thats been in my dad's side of the family too? either way my parents knew of the name due to irish catholic reasons. yipee! though im cool with it bc st. brigid used to be the goddess brigid from irish myth, and also both of them were badasses <3
When was the last time you cried? .....genuinely i think the last time i cried was in like. early march when i watched the holdovers? i think? taking a break from college has greatly decreased the frequency at which i cry lmao
Do you have kids? no sir
Do you use sarcasm a lot? i guess yes? probably about as much as the average person (this is not sarcasm)
What sports do you play? i do not play any currently (though i probs should. i am built like a twig and a strong wind will knock me over.) but as a kid i used to play soccer which i hated and was god awful at and softball which i liked more but i was also god awful at and mostly spent my time hitting foul balls and playing with the grass in right field. but it was fun!
What’s the first thing you notice about people? uhhhhhh. uh?????? if they're wearing a cool outfit or have cool hair or smth? idk man. i guess i dont rlly think abt it?
What’s your eye color? brown
Scary movies or happy endings? uh. both? am p sure my tolerance for horror is a lot higher than most people and im always down for a tragedy but i also like happy endings too. though from a writing perspective happy endings are significantly easier to pull off than sad ones (& more common. hero's journey and all that).
Any special talents? uhhhhh im double jointed in my thumbs. also i can put my foot behind my head. is that a talent? im also working on my sudoku time, i think my lowest time for master difficulty is around 6 mins 30 seconds? which is uh. above average?? i think???
Where were you born? idk apparently they cloned me in a lab somewhere
What are your hobbies? lately playing a lot of video games, writing (mostly fanfic), art stuff (mostly drawing but am learning how to use watercolor), uhhhh.... ttrpgs but i havent gotten to play in a while sadly
Do you have any pets? dog!!!!!
How tall are you? 5'3
Favourite subject in school? science
Dream job? ahahahah funny you should ask that, i say, having been doubting my choices in career aspirations and my post-undergrad 5-year plan that i've had since high school for the past 7 months, (please send help. but. for a serious answer. i think i still want to do science research? just maybe in a softer science like psych even tho my undergrad is bio & neuro???? idk. unsure.)
tagging uhhhhhhh candiedjellybean already tagged most of the ppl i usually tag sooo @halflingkima ? i think i tagged u last time too lol. & anyone else who wants to do this!!!
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werebutch · 1 month
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why do you have to move in with anyone? dude dont feel bad for telling your miserable piece of shit dad to fuck off 😭 its fine and normal even please live for yourself and not for some loser old man.. if people threaten to kill themselves and then do thats their choice. not anything you could have done abt it really especially because he sounds like a dickhead. idk this probably sounds rude as hell coming from a stranger but ive been in a similar situation to yours and living for yourself is so much better than being some losers maid, caregiver, and therapist
I completely understand where ur coming from and if it was just him asking me to move back cuz he’s a dick then I would think the exact same. Unfortunately my dad is disabled and his doctor wants me to look after him and make sure he doesn’t keel over and die. He’s been fainting a lot and they don’t know why. He’s been hospitalized for like 2 weeks now and last year he was for months. Half of me knows that he needs me back and doesn’t want to fight about it anymore, and half of me is like fuck that old man I need to escape. So I’m not sure how long I’ll be there if I really do move back there at all. It is kind of insane cause he’s telling me that he doesn’t want me to work and he’s glad that I don’t go out with people like my sister does cause that means more time with him 😭 it does make me want to crawl out of my skin but if I don’t look after him I’m worried about ….. idk. He will turn my sisters against me, spiral again into delusions and paranoia and self doubt, he might hurt himself on purpose as a gotcha. He does that a LOT. but I understand what ur saying. I don’t want him to think I don’t care for him and love him cause I do, I just resent him. You know 😭 SO IDK LOL I don’t know what I’m gonna do but if I have to stay there I think I’m gonna ask for $ cause I can’t be doing this INSTEAD of work and not get paid. I feel spoiled but everyone is telling me I should lol. So yes. Gonna talk to my therapist about it tomorrow but it will work out somehow and I appreciate your words lol
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adanaac · 1 year
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Could I ask about your OC's? Specifically Ophicucus and Tsuru, I love how majestic Ophi is drawn and Tsuru fascinates me both with the concept and also how lovely you have illustrated him.
I hope you are well, and thank you again for helping me with my questions o7.
Sincerely HMAD.
oh good i get to talk about my son!!
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my blorbo my beloved my babygirl he means everything to me
i made him in 2017 so hes sort of grown up with me (or i've grown up and realised things about him that i couldn't have when i was younger. i have so many complicated feelings abt this that i made a short comic about it last year)
to preface this im not a great writer dont expect good writing from me lol all i have is my personal experience and stealing tropes from stories i like
(got a lot to say so its all going under the cut. also a lot of death mention)
So. who is this dude
Tsuru (not his real name in-story, i havent come up with one im happy with), 18 years old, a ghost
he has a little sister, Ori, 15, who was meant to be my sona but then i just drew him more and like drawing him more anyway
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first 2 drawings i ever did of him. he was based off natori natsume yuujinchou at this point, i dont remember why or if i even liked natori that much, but i remember distinctly hes based off him
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u may have noticed he sort of looks older in my older art. this is because first of all art style drift lol but also as ive gotten older ive figured out that 18 isnt actually that old.
theres also a black haired version of him (two actually) its basically something like this ⬇️
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important to know that everything about this dude is a convoluted metaphor
i lovingly summarize white tsuru as "people pleaser" and black tsuru as "nihilist prick" in my head and those are the things consistent throughout all the AU versions of him
(important differences only to me) alive tsuru doesnt act like black tsuru at all thats just his warped self perception (he also doesnt act exactly like white tsuru either)
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also alive tsuru has black eyes and the shortest hair, black tsuru has blue eyes and slightly longer hair (also white tsuru is slightly taller than both of them)
if they all existed at the same time they would hate each other on sight but fortunately (unfortunately?) he is just 1 dude with issues
the general vibe is white tsuru is the "yippee floaty trickster" brand of ghost and black tsuru is the sort of ghost in horror media that stands just outside your field of view in the darkness dripping with blood
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for the longest time only white haired tsuru was a "character", "black haired tsuru" existed just as his corpse at most, a footnote
but over the past 2 years ive figured that hes actually really fun to draw and play with, and in a different way than white tsuru
(wait fuck isnt this just abe trio. i do always almost accidentally draw tsuru when im trying to draw haruaki.... fuck.....)
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(ive had tsuru for long enough that i just keep tacking details from my fav characters onto him.....)
halls smp
so ive been on this minecraft roleplay server called halls smp with other artists for the past 2 years, theres a new season of it every few months with a different theme each time to keep things fresh and ive just been making AU versions of tsuru for it so ive had a lot of opportunity to think about him
season 1 - halloween - jiangshi tsuru
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this one is almost entirely unchanged from his base characterization because i didnt want to rp too much and also didnt know there would be future seasons at this point (also basically after the first day i gave up on being called "tsuru" bc its too hard to pronounce and everyone called me canada anyway)
same basic story, guy dies and theres now a white haired version of him (actually this is the same for all the AUs). in fact im pretty sure the black haired version of this one is exactly base alivetsuru. basically what ive been interested in exploring is different kinds of death, the events leading up to it, and what kind of person he becomes afterwards (but also in equal amounts im interested in making fun designs and playing minecraft and fucking around)
(this feels like the start of the beginners guide...)
i associate him with doves and at the time, tarot card 18: the moon, but in retrospect i now think he's card 0: the fool.
season 2 - winter - ishmael
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guy who died at sea and eaten by a interdimensional whale and got isekaied. loosely conceptually based off moby dick, although i havent actually read it LOL but i did spend a week reading up on drowning and hypothermia
strangely, his death didnt create a white haired version of him, perhaps because he didnt have anything in life to give up his identity and replace it with. (and also remember the hair color doesnt actually mean dead/alive)
im only calling him ishmael now in retrospect, at the time he was just tsuru/canada
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while designing him i had the biggest crisis bc i didnt want him to look to much like this old old oc i had (pic 1) but then i sucked it up and went with it anyway
i never got around to drawing it but his fingers are black from frostbite thats why he wears gloves all the time.
hes one of my favorite iterations of tsuru he looks so mad or upset all the time it makes me want to tease him, and also i think the grey skin and eyebags are very cute
i associate him with whales and tarot card 18: the moon
season 3 - golden grove - fox tsuru
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honestly i think this is my favorite design of him i kinda popped off. i think im just a lot more comfortable working with warm colors. and also i associate white tsuru with foxes anyway (black tsuru is totally a catboy btw) (why is he not associated with cranes if his name is tsuru you ask?? bc cranes are hard to draw next question. he did start out based off cranes tbf, thats where the white hair and the tallness comes from)
dead fox possessing his dead human friend's body (although thats only the most literal interpretation of events; in all these iterations there's only ever been 1 person) the white tsurus are mostly interested in "moving on", whatever that means to each of them
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btw my banner on this blog is him
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hes sort of a set with s2 tsuru to me, mostly bc theyre the ideals that "white tsuru" and "black tsuru" hold taken to the extremes, and also theyre on opposite ends of the "hates people hates talking" and "loves to talk and mess with people" scale
anyway. hes tarot card 10: wheel of fortune to me
season 4 - wild west - mirage
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the desert dragon, mirage. this is the season i started giving them actual names that arent "tsuru" and putting actual thought into the story lol previously it was just vibes-based character design. i have a short thing written about him thats meant to be the script for a comic, but i never got around to drawing it.
a sandworm-esque dragon that got tired of being a dragon and took up a passing witch's offer to give him a human form. this is all a metaphor i think. he has longer hair bc i wanted to spice things up a little
(also i consider this a form of death bc he left behind a giant sandworm/dragon skeleton somewhere in the desert)
the mirage-dragon thing comes from the shen 蜃 (which is used in the chinese word for mirage, 海市蜃楼 haishi shenlou, literally translating to "ocean city and shen's castle"). it's a clam-like dragon that produces foam that creates mirages over the ocean.
if u read "even if you slit my mouth", this is what the "shinkiro" or "shin" in recent chapters is. (i had one of those "smug because i already know all about the mythological creature a story is referencing" moments, which i also had with the four gods in yohaji bc i used to translate a game that mentioned them too)
isnt it romantic in a way? that the two places mirages are most known for happening are the ocean and the desert.
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i dont have too much art of him because around this time i was uhhh (checks calendar) got back into yohaji and got consumed by it for a couple months lol (can u even blame me. it was july to september that was when like chapter 91 came out lol)
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an earlier version of his design that i didnt end up using but i still really like this art
hes tarot card 9: the hermit to me
season 5 - fairytales/medieval - ophiuchus
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NO FUCKING WAY YOURE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS for this one i actually ironed out what kind of people the black haired and white haired versions of him are. and also specifically this one isnt black tsuru but alive tsuru
i have a short poem thing about him, to summarize its like so many other fairytales about grateful animals granting their saviors something, but it doesnt end well for anyone
hes based off ophiuchus and asclepius of course, but also a lot of other snake stories in general, like the lindwurm and baishezhuan
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to reiterate, for none of these stories do i consider there to ever actually have been 2 separate people, its always just 1 fucked up guy
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i also sort of consider him to be a set with mirage, for both being serpents, and also for being "black tsuru whose personality is like white tsuru" and "white tsuru whose personality is like black tsuru", thereby codifying for myself that to him, someone who's stuck in his own head a lot, what matters most to him is his ideals, what all his actions are in pursuit of
he's tarot card 12: the hanged man to me
bonus: dnd character - alba
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i also have a version of him i play for dnd, named alba to match with my party who all have color themed names. a halfling ranger who's very small and very loud. except he has amnesia and cant remember anything from before he was 12 (hes around 18 now according to him), including that he's actually a changeling who just transformed into a halfling to seem older than he is to work at a bar and nearly died in a bar fight.
(if you spend as much time fretting over semantics as me, you may note that changelings are medium sized and cannot transform into halflings which are small sized, for which my explanation is that he's been in halfling form since he was a kid, and after the amnesia he thought he actually was a halfling. this is also why his hair is white btw bc changelings have white hair. pre-amnesia in his "actual" halfling transformation he had black hair. i care too much about semantics but hey isnt dnd the semantics game anyway?)
anyway congrats alba for being the only version of tsuru that hasn't outright "died"!! if only because dnd has actual rules and i can't pull my usual death-ghost nonsense as easily!!!
hes very ship of theseus to me, all versions of him are. what makes up a person? what defines them? is it their face, their appearance, their name? their personality, their memories, their ideals? if you slowly replace each of those, one at a time, with a copy thats very similar to the original, at what point are you a different person?
as thanks for reading all of this i'll reveal what some of the metaphors are, the core of who tsuru, as a character, is to me. maybe this is fairly obvious, but all the death and personality weirdness stuff is a convoluted metaphor for depression and autism, as well as the experience of reading the things you've written years ago, seeing old photos and others talking about who you were years ago and finding that person wholly unfamiliar, that you understand the thought process of that person no more than you would a stranger's, as a result of having taken apart your identity and replaced it piece by piece with things from people you like more than yourself.
im always scared of scrutinizing tsuru too hard because he's just a weird reflection of myself, and i think i'll only be able to write a version of him thats more of a "whole person" once i figure that out for myself. the only way you see your own reflection is through a mirror after all, a flattened 2D surface.
haha this got kinda weird and depressing and personal at the end (mostly bc ive been writing this in the middle of the night, its now 4am)
after seeing my soul laid bare like this, if theres one takeaway, i think its pretty obvious why i'm so enamored by the parts of yohaji that i talk about often (huh wasnt this a post about my oc why did it become about yohaji)
oh yeah i just realised u probably also wanted to hear more about my yohaji version of tsuru specifically. honestly theres not really more to it i just like drawing him in situations. like of course the same themes apply but i just like drawing this dude thats 90% the reason hes my sona. like heres a pokemon au of him i drew recently bc i wanted to draw them as kids and also as pokemon gijinkas
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anyway thats all. not really bc i could go on and on about him but this is way too long and also way too personal at this point. i think about him a disproportionate amount, i only have 2 other ocs i remotely care about and the extent of my thoughts for those guys is "i think hes fun 👍"
this has probably also been like, the 3rd most comprehensive description of tsuru that ive made, 1st being the thoughts in my head and 2nd being the past 5 years worth of DMs with my friend who i talk about tsuru with
(why was this sort of structured like the beginners guide. if youve seen the beginners guide tell me if im right or delusional. if u havent, go watch a playthrough of it, have an existential crisis, and then afterwards tell me)
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ilovejoo · 2 years
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HI HAJZJA IM HERE FOR THE MATCH MAKING THING. Here's my details.
My preferred group is enhypen
Pronouns are she/her
MBTI : ISTP-T
Hobbies : dancing, gaming, listening to music and watching random bs lmaoo
Love Language : I'm a mix of everything. I love LOVE phsyical touch like i crave hugs and kisses (maybe... i haven't kissed anyone cuz I'm single asf). My friends say mine's Words of affirmations too.
Likes : MY DOG BRO SHES LITERALLY THE CUTEST LITTLE BABAJWJZSNS. SHES A LABRADOR AND SHE TURNS 4 THIS MONTH! dancing and my friends and loved ones. BOBA AND ICE CREAM AND CHOCOLATE. there's so many things i could go on.
Dislike : I hate mint choco. No questions asked it's literally TOOTHPASTE and CHOCOLATE. i hate people who are annoying too and like pick me's (i want u to pick me pick me pick me up). I hate the kind of people who pretend they know everything like pls shut up. I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE DON'T GIVE ME LOVE AND AFFECTION ILL LITERALLY SULK. i cant think of any LOL.
How i would describe myself hmm, I care slot ab people I love, i will literally kill anyone who hurts my loved ones. i do goof around alot to show my child side but if the situation persists i get serious and I SCARE PEOPLE BRO 💀. I also remember dance choreography fast, probably due to cuz ive been dancing for years lol. I'm also really supportive abt stuff. I also tend to be honest asf and say stuff that can hurt someone's feelings. Like if ur wearing smth and u look bad I'll tell it to you 😭
My height : i think I'm 164cm ( 5'5 )
What i look like : I'm very insecure ab my fave but I'll describe how i look. I have Dark brown hair and Dark brown eyes. I'm tanned (probably like hwasa SHES A QUEEN). Some friends do say i have doe eyes and plump lips.
I look for someone who loves me for who i am and i have the connection with him. I don't date for the sake of dating like how people do in my school. I also get very protective and i expect the same. He should be tall and look good but also have a good personality inside. He should be nice and kind not only to me but to everyone around him. A little possesive is ok. He should be very trustworthy and also trust me. He should know what limits are. Someone i can be myself around and someone i can talk to when I've had a bad day. SOMEONE WHO GIVES ALOT OF HUGS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME! Oh and also someone who's willing to do random shit with me lolll
I literally can't think rn LOL (I'll probably think ab some later and be like "oh shit i should have added smth"
HAVE A GOOD DAY ILY!
HAHAH DUDE THE PICK ME REFERENCE GOT ME SINGING i loved that song
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your valentine is... jungwon!
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listen to: wii date by city girl, highvyn, tiffi, and siopaolo
hearing about your dog reminded me of his dog like. imagine not only you guys bonding but your dogs bonding SO CUTE
jungwon hugs r the best hugs
DANCING TOGHTHER TOO omg
how you spend vday together...
you both wanted to go on a walk as a part of your date; as the flowers started to bloom on the sidewalks and the sky started to clear, there was no better thing than going on a stroll hand in hand.
you knew that jungwon liked going on walks, so you happily went with him. however, rather than just being the two of you, you decided to bring both of your dogs along.
as you walked, while one hand held their leashes, the unoccupied hand held the hand of the other. occasional squeezes of the hand and swinging of your arms occupied majority of the walk until your dog decided to cross over jungwon's leash, causing you to trip over- which in turn caused jungwon to quickly reach over and catch you.
"you flirt," you said, laughing as you playfully shoved him away and dusted yourself off. "thanks."
"can't have you getting hurt," he said, laughing as well.
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braintapes · 1 year
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man i know ive been reblogging a lot of posts abt how awful the job hunt is but truly. genuinely. the whole thing is just so utterly thoroughly completely fuckin Borked dude. fully just Does Not Work
job listings are either fake, scams, inaccurate to the role they want filled, poorly written, written by someone who doesn't know what the job is supposed to entail, are either way too short or way too long, and/or by and large don't include the actual information you actually for real actually NEED to know whether the job is worth your time to apply for, such as, i dunno, the salary. your actual everyday job duties and what you Actually need to perform them. an absurd amount go out of their way to specify just how able bodied you need to even Think about Breathing on the job listing (very) even when that's blatantly false because fuck anyone with a disability i suppose.
assuming some of the jobs are, in fact, real jobs that someone would like filled by a human person to perform a series of tasks, you still may not have a good selection. depending on location you could be out of luck for any halfway decent work. there's a billion positions open for things you Know you can't do. the jobs all seem to come in the following flavors: entry level (but you must have 1-2 years experience in this field) entry level (must have a masters degree a phd and 6-10 years experience) and entry level (must have 5 years experience and be willing to lift an entire house's weight in manual labor every single day with no break)
if you don't have experience having a job well. sucks to suck i guess!
but whatever. okay. find some promising (read: seemingly not fake/scam) listings. go to apply. upload a resume you spent hours poring over to make sure ATS wouldn't mangle it while also keeping it professional and with all the relevant information to make you look as good as possible to prospective employers. the company website then takes the resume you uploaded (in the correct format) and dumps it in the trash. manually write down all of the information in their little text boxes please! oh and also make an account with all your personal information to even have the privilege of getting to fill out this application. mandatory work history information required. fill out this questionnaire - just be sure not to step on the mines and answer a question Wrongly. "why do you want to work at this company?" write an essay for us detailing the most personal aspects of yourself. dont click the buttons that masquerade as offering accommodations and diversity inclusion because theyll actually just set all of this on fire if youre actually honest. grovel in our uncaring text boxes about how badly you want to be part of our team and how YOU can best serve US you worthless dog. slowly crawl your way out of the last circle of hell so you can be done with the application. click the last button. write the last bit of forced-smile text so your teeth dont feel like they're going to shatter apart anymore
wait for weeks. then for months only for a rejection long since youve moved on. assuming you get a response, as the standard now seems to be ghosting. repeat process again and again and again and AGAIN. endlessly. scraping and clawing and begging. youre not grovelling enough. youre not kneeling and cowering and pleading hard enough. the people in your life who Do have jobs cant seem to understand why youre so distressed by it all because, well, They got jobs so Why Can't You? repeat process. repeat process. repeat process.
on a rare occasion, get a response (!!) and make it to the interview stage (!!!!!) which as it turns out is not actually a discussion about the job and how youd fit into it but a vibes check where you prostrate yourself once again to the hiring manager and they decide if they personally like you enough as someone they'd want to hang out with on the weekends to let you in. high chance to fail this immediately if you are some kind of minority, but because they dont want to get in trouble for discrimination, they instead Make Up A Reason not to hire you which then makes it perfectly fine because you can't prove the real reason. browse through your email to see the other rejections. repeat process.
remember that for every application you send out youre competing with hundreds of other desperate people who just need some money to god damned Survive. try to go find advice and find that everything is so heavily weighted in favor of employers it might as well be a fucking black hole (which would be apt considering everyones applications magically disappear) so the only advice anyone can give is pithy little platitudes about how you should look and act and speak and dress and behave and make sure youre grovelling! have you tried grovelling!! are you doing that enough because if you arent well it really is your fault isnt it then!
god and like even if you GET a job it's still a shit job and there's still no ladder any more. there's no Progression it's just moving horizontally across various shit jobs. even the "easiest" jobs to get hired at, customer service jobs, retail, food service, etc, are so terrible you arent treated like a human being by basically anyone from customers to managers. you arent allowed to sit down. you need to grovel STILL. to your boss. to customers. constantly. for 10 dollars an hour, probably less depending on location. but you have to agree to work all their horrible shifts for 10 hours a day on your feet no sitting 2 15 minute breaks fuck man. fuck. FUCK. WHAT IS ANYONE SUPPOSED TO DO AT THIS POINT?????
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anakinskywalkerog · 1 year
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omg no way tumblr never bothered to tell me you replied. plus why is nothing showing up in my following feed??? a bone to pick for next time ig
ahaha i missed this too you're so good with advice! ❤ and thank you hehe i have been informed the new pfp it a character calld lust from an anime called fullmetal alchemist, but i just like the aesthetic
it really is and thank youuuuu! im sure it will! *sends ✨good luck✨*
hmm i dont wanna obsess over han at all, because first of all, ELI! that would be unfair. and han is sort of crazy, anyways. i am listening to i can see you from speak now tv but i shouldnt because it reminds me of han. it also reminds me of anakin. very anakincore track. i cant help it though, i can see you is so good, although it gives more of a reputation vibe than speak now tbh. still love it anyways and thank mother taylor for it. are you enjoying speak now tv? what's your favourite track? i think im enjoying mine, mean and back to december, but everything is ofc v nice! wish we had a mine pop mix tv and some more beat to enchanted, but its perfect as it is!
yess "there will be plenty more guys 😂 trust me." that's exactly what i thought, too! like, he's here now, but someday there's going to be someone else EXACTLY like that. although it might not be so bad if i did make a decision influenced by him because he and i have a similar objective - physics/engineering degree at oxford/cambridge so its a win-win no matter which way i go ig. plus we're academic rivals. competition is the norm for us. but about intrigue with han...
"oh? whos your friend? (i asked han to pose for one of my snaps hehe) is this friend good-looking?"
... dude? like, WHAT? that sounds like pretty blatant flirting to me.
but lets not forget that once we were in the corridor and bro leaned in super close (keep in mind this was months ago and this was in the middle of like 15 other people anyways) and i leaned away out of reflex 😂 i think he looked at me later with a very patronizingly disappointed
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kinda expression. i think that was a test, and i failed miserably but thats fine 💀
eli really is we even have loads of similar interests!
yw and sameee! it is hehe she even send me memes and is a pedro pascal stan (as she should. pedro pascal is an icon. love him) ! very happy with that
oh no, is everything okay? can i do anything to help? if it helps, my life is only peaceful because i am in isolation from all friends, hehe i need time to regenerate. i am an ambivert at heart. my extrovert meter needs to recharge lmaooo
also, a part of me wonders if cranberry is mad at me? basically, he aksed me to write a steamy story abt him and han (thyre best friends) and didnt want his gf to find out incase she thought he was weird (bro she already does. shes ur gf. she knows what weird she signed up for smh)
anyways i made a small oopsie. i asked some people to critique it for me, and one of those poeple may have been the girl from my diary, whos friends with cranberry's gf, and who previously told machete i liked him when i wanted it to be a scret and explicitly told her so, and the one who i knew cannot be trusted with secrets because she will tell someone and lie about it 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
anyways cranberry was annoyed (and understandably so.) he said his gf was mad at him (impossible - if she was, shed be mad at ME first cos thats how women are. better than revenge is living proof. but she isnt! ) and i get it, but then people stop being mad, right? i mean, ive been really mad at him too, for a variety of reasons. i forgave him though and he didnt even apologize like i did! but he seemed normal at prom perhaps a bit icy? a guy friend told me im overthinkinngit and while he may have been annoyed it doesnt mean hd stop being friends with me or anything, and that he definitely wouldnt stay mad because its not a big deal.
but i texted him cranberry with a pretty obvious joke and he didnt even find it funny??? like thats HIS sort of joke??? how does he ot find that funny??? my friend says he must be mad then, but says theres the chance he just didnt find it funny?
like, i get it, but i want to make amends! and i wont even see cranberry in person so i can never tell. but if he was mad, he wouldve blocked me, or left me on delivered, or just opened. but he even sees my stories n stuff!
plus his friends would be mad if something happened. like guys are super gangy like that. but his friends are not mad at all, like han and this other guy are totally normal and no one sad that. even when han brought it up the day after the whole thing, he didnt imply it was serious and just dropped it after joking around abt it.
my friend did say if i was friends with cranberrys friends, it doesnt mean they have to be mad, but what if cranberry and his gf broke up over something as stupid as a joke???? and it was my fault??? i would feel awful and i cant even tell or say sorry.
nor can i ask han over text cos then hed tell cranberry and itd be weird. and i cant ask eli cos i dont want to set a bad rep.
he texted about it and i delved into a tiny argument he said its fine but "just think more next time". i think he and han both know i didnt mean for this to happen and that it was a genuine accident, but people gte hurt over things even if they know it wasnt meant to hurt them. shoulve said no is proof of this.
but they did send me a video of them reading the story together [cranberry and his friends, it was han who filmed (i did ask them to film their reaction)] and cranberry was cracking up as he read it! if he was mad he wouldve abandoned it. but they sill seemed to love it. surely if cranberry was mad at me, then that wouldnt have happened?
jesus christ, thats LONG. i apologize for troubling you, i didnt think itd get this long! its just been on my mind :( ironically it happened yesterday just after i was so happy. ugh. boys are awful
yes haha thank youuu :) if you're okay with my constant somewhat accidental drama dumps, i definitely will :D
love you and stay safe x
hi sythe so sorry it took me so long to respond to this!
I hope all is well with Eli. but GIRL have I been listening to “I Can See You” sooooo much it’s literally the delulu girl anthem! I love it. having a little crush on Han just adds some spice!! there’s nothing wrong with a little seasoning to an otherwise boring existence 😂
I am okay 🩵 just really been struggling with my OCD lately. I hope it gets better soon.
no fuckinf WAY cranberry asked you to write a steamy story!!? girl that is NOT platonic. what are these men doing out here 😂😂😂😂 but I agree, very unlikely that he is mad at you
I love the drama dumps, I wish we could vent together for real because I have been ALL over the place with my drama lately 😅 but it’s fine, it adds the comedy. i’m watching my own life like a work of absurdism. I would absolutely recommend that strategy.
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starscelly · 1 year
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i’m the question asking anon from earlier and istg literally every time you share something about this au i just become more invested! i will read anything you post about them why do these boys have my heart
robo’s rebellion moment made me chuckle, it’s also so sweet that his mom helped familiarize him with the guitar!
i still don’t know what questions to ask so ig this is like another ‘ today i want to talk about [ insert thing here]’ (heck, it can be another 5 of those, however many you need/want)
i guess a question is how did roope find robo and otter? what made them realize that they fit/work together in that way?
the boys also have my heart and every single inch of space in my brain so i get it !!!! thank u again for ur like. investment and giving me space to blab abt them fudfkskldsfl i appreciate it sm <3 <3
i had to marinate and think a Lot on how robo, jake, and roope all meet bc obviously coming from 3 different places there has to be an element of chance but also. i dont wanna go completely batshit lmao. here's an Attempt at explaining my thoughts!!:
otter still goes to college but instead of bu. bc he's not pursuing hockey. he ends up going to ut austin (its a good communications school and he actually has a communications degree like. real life)
he doesnt rlly Love school but he’s figuring out what he wants in life and his parents wanted him to go. so.
robo and him meet at some random ass show in texas, where robo only is bc his family drove over in the rv for a Different show
they dont immediately run off together and play music lol but they do keep in contact via text and calls for a few months, rlly Bond and become super close
robo comes through texas with his family again eventually but theyre not performing in austin this time, just dallas. so jake goes out there to see them
they've kind of vaguely been talking abt forming their own band at this point but obviously there's the distance that both of them are kind of. scared to close on a whim for smthn that might not work. and also they want to get someone who can consistently do lead vocals and play bass etc
anyways. they have a couple free days so they go to random house shows and smaller venues around dallas
roope is in the area bc at this time he's playing in the NAHL but heavily considering dropping hockey for music (he Actually played for bismarck and for like 2 games but. for the au ive decided he played longer for the lone star brahmas lol) and is basically just trying to find out what he's heading for, what he Wants
they see roope performing with a band that is like. Not His but just kind of a random assortment of his friends in the scene fucking around having fun (the house show is at one of his friend's places)
and roope is not. a great singer. he's not professionally trained and amazing. but he has a really fucking unique and cool voice (they will later find out this is bc of his accent and aversion to having a clear throat) so theyre like. heavily heavily intrigued bc they think it could make for a sick sound . in their band. what a coincidence!!
robo. looking like the most average dude ever. walks up to him after like hey ... we saw u from across the punk house and rlly dig ur vibe. and otter is kind of mortified but also is like ^^ play music with us please just to see ^^
roope is in an . emotionally difficult time in his life trying to decide if he wants to take a leap and leave all he's ever known his entire life. so obviously he jumps at the first chance and is like. Fuck It let's do it
obviously there's more logistics - roope finishes out his season before fully committing to the band, robo has to have this whole discussion with his family and have this emotional ass move to dallas, otter doesnt drop out completely but does have to explain to his family that his band is going to be his first priority at some point and starts taking only online classes etc - but thats how those three kind of. Meet and Click
theyre also still having bassist woes and thats when roope calls miro etc but. this isnt abt him rn for once
its a weird mix of a lot of Right Place Right Time scenarios, but how else do two americans who have no reason to ever meet end up with two finns who have little reason to be in america in the first place!!
i also think at first there's not really. Issues necessarily. but it takes a while for otter and robo, who are both super friendly open people, to kind of figure out roope's whole thing so they can finally click. which he's not Unfriendly per se but also he's not going out of his way to make conversation. but once they figure out oh he doesnt hate us and he's not even like one of those mean snappy punks he's just. european.. it's all relatively smooth sailing from there lol . it also helps when miro finally arrives and is both much friendlier at face value and also has roope being overly affectionate and up his ass 24/7 (which eventually bleeds over into his interactions with the other two)
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thisisegregiouuuus · 23 days
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the cat in the hat is one of the worst movies ever, it is so gross and the cat is not even a cat idk what it is, some kind of spawn from hell, and its a disgusting terrible movie, so gross that dr seuss's wife was apaprently and RIGHTFULLY repulsed by the movie so she banned live action adaptions for her husbands books. thank GOD
i do not like the cat in the hat but on the other hand its so funny and i love it like its so much fun, its so terrible that its actually fun. i still hate it tho
anyway im kind of going thru a crisis rn, idk what to put for my pfp on here, i dont wanna go all out with the cat in the hat stuff bc then ill actually throw up so im only changing my banner (im the 'guy in the sweater that asks all the obvious questions' TRUST me, aka the cat in the hat w a blond wig)
so yeah idk what to put for my pfp. its usually smth that i rlly love at this moment but rn im not rlly into anything, like rn i do love the cat in the hat but in a way where i also hate it and if i see too much of it and i realise it MIGHT. MIGHT. be becoming a phase/interest, i will vomit everything out, but otherwise i dont have anything else going on for me! it rlly hurt to remove the luis serra stuff tho </3 RIP MY LUIS SERRA GET UP!!!! I LOVE YOU AND YOU WILL BE MISSED!!!
ANYWAY!!! so far on here i havent talked abt much besides the shining i thnik, but i like a whole bunch of random different things, so i guess im a multi-fandom person or smth, but yeah im into a lot of different things and franchises or idk whatever u wanna call them
rn im getting back into rh on roblox!!! ive been playing since i was like idk 10 or smth so yeah, not to brag or anything, but im kind of a pro 😼 (im actually not ive never even gotten a halo). but i do go into these phases where im suddenly rlly interested to play rh, i get super invested in it for like a week or so, then i drop it and dont touch it for a few months, then i come back and see whats new. rinse and repeat! its like that for most of my other interests too but yeah
anyway besides all that i dont do much on rh, i just hop on, do my dailies, might play the musical chairs thing, and thats abt it! the only other thing i love to do on there is dress up and make new ocs. not even kidding, i have a whole google doc dedicated to my like 20 rh ocs on there, who are mostly under developed lmao. i also like making stupid impuslive decisions with my diamonds and buying things ik i dont need, like i was so close to spending alllll my hard earned diamonds that are already kind of hard to get nowadays on dorm stuff bc i loved how cool and creative ppl could get with their dorms, but i am not a builder, only a decorater. i am a lover not a fighter
so yeah anyway im soooooooo glad the summer thing is gonna be over in like 2 days bc its abt time. like omg. im so excited for the halloween stuff tho, the halloween updates are usually the best/my favs in rh and while i dont rlly think the rh devs are gonna make any kind of new halloween event bc theyre busy with other stuff, im still hopeful and mostly excited to buy myself the whimsy witch heels, and maybe the bat mo heels.
so anyway, back to what i was saying, i made a new oc on rh!!! i have no idea what shes abt tho. shes totally gorgeous and i love her sm but like i have no idea what to do with her, im still deciding on her personality, but i have no idea what her name or occupation/backstory/hobbies and stuff are gonna be, and usually when im making a character, i decide that stuff along the way as i make them, but im still rlly undecided.
anyways im gonna show a few pics of her that i took (bc if theres one thing i lvoe more than wasting many hours trying to perfect how my ocs look, its spending even longer taking photos of them afterwards!)
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the first 2 are my absoloute favourites. shes just so pretty dude like i lvoe looking at her liek PLEAASSEEEE JUST ONE CHANCE!!! LET ME BE THE ONE!!!!! shes gorgeous i love her
but yeah i have noooo idea what im gonna do for her. a lot of my rh ocs are mythical creatures also and i have no idea what kind fo mythical creature im gonna make her, or if shes just gonna be a regular human or smth, but thats too boring
so yeah. i love her so much but idk how or where to get inspo for her and what shes abt and stuff
also i kind of rlly want her to interact and maybe even be friends with my other oc, kitty
ive introduced kitty on here before but it was a private post i posted ages ago so ill just make a separate post for kitty. but yeah thats abt all!!
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sociallyawkward--fics · 2 months
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HEY BACK AGAIN. idk how long its been cuz mobile is trash but me n my friend were talking abt how we were in a lot of the same fandom spaces as kids. Sanders sides being one of them. n i was like..... Long shot but do u know sociallyawkward--fics.. n at first they were like no i dont think so.. but then they looked u up n went OH MY GOD YEA??? ill send u a screenshot off anon but i told them we were friends n they said it was like finding out i knew a celebrity LMAO -H (ironic considering theyre prob more popular on ao3 than u😭 they briefly turned back into a 12yo fanboy)
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its still so crazy to me ive known u for so long n met him like 3-4 years ago worlds collide ..... Also u can post this though im off anon if u want idc -H
ALSO. since im here. idk if i ever told u my age but when i sent my first ask to u i was probably 11. maybe 10 even. im turning 18 in a couple months now. its hard to bring myself to read some of the asks (ok most of the asks) i sent u over the years bc i was an incredibly anxious and awkward autistic kid. But u always treated me with so much love hahakjs at the time i was rly struggling n had very few friends n AS MUCH AS IT MAKES ME CRINGE TO LOOK BACK ON u were honestly the only older person i could talk to n it rly meant a lot lol. im so much more confident n comfortable in myself than i was all those years ago n ik i dont send u asks nearly as frequently anymore but tbh even if eventually its only once every few years ill always think back on u so fondly n gratefully. Neway i literally hate being sappy so ill shut up here but yeah. Thanks n such -H
ALSO IDK IF UR ACTIVE ON AMY SOCIAL MEDIA RLY?? BUT IF U R I CAN GIVE U SOME OF MY SOCIALS mostly i just tweet abt my day occasionally on twitter but i also have a sideblog where i post art. just thinking that maybe then i wouldnt have to be like 'and heres a quick summary of the past 8 months' n u could check up on me whenever instead of only seeing me when i send asks😭 -H (its also so less formal cuz when i send in asks u Gotta respond whereas if i post 'just ate a kickass burger' u can just. Like it. idk idc either way but lmk ^__^)
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I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ANSWER THESE FOR MONTHS SINCE I'VE BEEN USING TUMBLR AGAIN AND MY LACK OF OBJECT PERMANENCE HAD ME KEEP FORGETTING I AM SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭
dkjfhkdhf omg that is so wild that you have a friend who also knows about me dkjfhdsf Sanders Sides (back when it was waaaaay smaller of a fandom lol) was the first (and tbh only, really) fandom where i had any real level of "popularity" as a fic writer, and i fed off that high for SO LONG lol -- hearing that people were obsessed with my work, both then and now after the fact, is genuinely so surreal dfkjhdjkfh like. i am just Here, i am just Some Dude who wrote some words that got them weirdly popular at 17-18 dkjsfhdkjfh (also cuz i try to gather all your asks into one post, you continue to remain anonymous just cuz i copy-pasted them into the post in the same order they were received lol)
Dude it is CRAZY that you are almost 18 (or, by the time i am finally managing to answer this with my Bad Brain Powers procrastinating it so long, already 18) -- I looked back and I was 18 when you sent your first ever ask to me dkjfhdf that's so wild. I am so honored that you saw me as an older person you could come and talk to, even if it was just through anonymous tumblr asks for the past 6+ years lol. I always think of you fondly too, and I am so proud of you for the way you've grown up and grown into your confidence
ALSO YOU CAN TOTALLY SEND ME YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA djfdjdsjkf you can absolutely send me any of your socials!!! I know your main blog because you've sent some asks without it (have I ever remembered to follow it??? I meant to but I can't remember, this is also a Brain Forget-y Accidental Procrastination thing), but I would LOVE to see your art sideblog and def feel free to send me your twitter!! I have not opened my twitter in like. 3 months, because i was having Unhealthy Habits so i tucked the app into a pocket out of site and stopped using it for a while, but I am doing better now and would definitely open it back up more often again to see what you were up to
Also!!! You can always feel free to DM me on any of my blogs/sideblogs here on tumblr, too! You don't have to wait to send an ask (though I love receiving asks from you, don't ever feel like you have to stop even if we connect elsewhere!), you can always DM me on any of my blogs (or on any other socials we may exchange, too!)
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anyway now that ive been in the fandom for a bit i think its time i called myself out and say that i. Love shiniida
hear me out. neutral good, disaster bi iida with true neutral, functional gay shinsou? we stan.
like just consider for a second. shinsou goes to talk with midoriya to get some closure abt their fight in the sports festival and obv talking to midoriya means having to be near his two besties iida and uraraka
anyway midoriya draws shinsou in like the sun he is and so he ends up kinda friends with iida and uraraka as well. along the line they become full-fledged friends esp when he starts doing extra training w them in addition to the training hes gettin from aizawa so he can “”keep up with you hero course nerds”” (in his own words)
anyway so he starts hangin out with the izucrew more and consequently. iida.
iida is the mom/dad friend (depends on his mood that day which one he is) so he usually organizes some hangouts that r also study groups. and now that shinsou is his friend, iida invites him as well
im thinkin eventually iida and shinsou figure out that iida has a strong suit in math but is weak in language, but shinsou is vice versa, so they decide to arrange extra study sessions so they can get the extra tutoring they feel they need
and finally,,,,the pining™ begins
im honestly not quite sure How they fall for each other or how long it would take buuuuuuut……,.,.
iida would definitely admire shinsou’s drive and determination and i feel he’d be rlly charmed by him once he got passed shinsou’s distant, kinda hostile first impression. like once he got passed shinsou’s kinda defenses and saw the tired, funky dude he is that loves cats and sweaters, iida’s poor bi heart wouldnt stand a chance, not even a second. iida would definitely think shinsou’s love for cats/all things cute is adorable. also i think iida would be exasperated w shinsou’s hair but like in the Fondest Way possible. at first he’s like “shinsou u gotta try to brush ur hair!” and shinsou is like “u can try it wont do anything” and hes right it Doesnt. but eventually the messy style grows on iida and he finds he wants to run his hands thro it,,,also iida at first kinda doesnt get shinsou’s sense of humor but he eventually learns to love it
shinsou on the other hand would be softly disgruntled abt how iida cares for him with what i call the Aggressive Affection. cause iida is just like “shinsou! its past 12 am! i would advise you get some rest now” and he wont stop badgering him until shinsou at least turns off his phone and like “shinsou! i made u breakfast bc u slept in late! u can eat it while we walk to class together!” and hands him some cute lil breakfast thing that keeps shinsou’s hands warm while they walk in the morning air. and at first shinsou is like “bruh” but eventually knowing that iida cares so much makes him feel all warm inside,,,,,, and shinsou Would 100 percent find iida’s chopping motions and general gestures he makes when he talks Adorable As Fuck. and he thinks its sweet that iida cares so much abt helpin him academically as well as heroically
anyway i think shinsou would realize his feelings first bc iida is,,,a disaster,,,and he would freak the fuck out becuz oh shit thats quite the distraction from becoming a hero student
iida notices when shinsou starts to avoid him and he gets really sad :[ and it rlly starts to bother him so he tries asking shinsou what he did wrong but shinsou is always in a flustered panic and its like “OHHH LOOK AT THE TIME GOT,,,GENERAL DEPARTMENT THINGS TO DO,,,,GOTTA GO BYE IIDA” so when asking shinsou doesnt work iida tries to ask his friends if they can think of anything but theyre just as confused as he is bc they didnt even realize shinsou was distancing himself. this just makes iida feel even worse bc that means its Just Him that shinsou’s avoiding so its Clear that he did do smth wrong
eventually he calls tensei abt it and tensei kinda calms him down abt it thank you tensei
meanwhile aizawa is like “what,,,is wrong with my child” bc hes not dumb hes observant as hell and he knows shinsou’s been acting kinda skittish lately esp during training so eventually after training one day aizawa sits him down and is like “im not letting u leave until u tell me why ur so freaked out lately” shinsou tries to fight to escape but aizawa is a Pro Hero and shinsou has only been training for a couple months now so he doesnt make it lmfao rip eventually shinsou gets out that he has a crush (how embarrassing poor guy probably wanted to spontaneously combust when he admitted it) and that he doesnt know what to do with it and aizawa is just like “wow mood”
no but really aizawa calls up mic and is like “hi yes hello ur the distinguished gay in this relationship can u give our dumb son some advice”
so mic swoops in and probably embarrasses shinsou a lil bit but overall shinsou accepts his feelings a little more after the talk so thats Something thanks mic
anyway so this pining goes on for a while longer with iida feeling :[ and shinsou feeling bad but like not knowing what to do dkjfjkf. like after the talk w mic it isnt nearly as bad as it was but shinsou’s still awkward and iida can still tell smth abt their relationship has gotten a little stilted :[ but then the joint training exercise happens and its reveled that shinsou is GOING INTO THE HERO COURSE BABEY!!!!!!!
iida is So Excited that he lifts our boy up and spins him around!!! and shinsou is so FUCKING gay he doesnt know how to function once hes put back on the ground smfh so much for being a functional gay huh shinsou
anyway iida starts apologizing profusely like “im so sorry shinsou my excitement just got the better of me and i hope i didnt make you uncomfortable but im so happy for you-!” and shinsou’s like “im in love with you” iida probably passes out lbr
no but both FREAK OUT over that confession and like its so fucking funny bc it was in front of EVERYONE and aizawa just fucking facepalms bc god why does his dumb kid have to take after him so much smh
anyway EVENTUALLY iida and shinsou calm down and before shinsou can Sprint the Fuck Away, iida is like “i!!!!! love you too!!! not as just a friend!!!” and shinsou hides his face in his mask/capture weapon and iida is just kinda bashfully holding his helmet close to his chest and HHH I LOVE MY BOYS………….
anyway they talk and shinsou is like “yeah so im sorry for being weird this past month and a half its because feelings” and iida is like “OHHHH i thought i did something wrong omg” and so they clear that up w each other and start dating. and they are. Adorable. THE couples’ goals in the izucrew. u wish u were as cute as them
iida reading on the couch w shinsou layin down on him?? iida reading TO him while he’s layin down on him in an attempt to help lull him to sleep??? oh my fucking god. thats so good. shinsou brings snacks to their study dates (and theyre actually iida’s idea of regularly scheduled dates someone help shinsou djkfjk) to make sure that they both actually get some food in them. TRAINING TOGETHER,…,..both get v flustered at first but then they get used to it,,im soft
just….my boys….thank you for your consideration. uhh stan shiniida
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livisart · 4 years
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sir thats my emotional support obscure boomer horror book series
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lickingteeth · 5 years
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i’m gonna sound like an incel but listen i’m not bashing every girl i’ve been romantic with i just want to speak on my own experiences and rant cause i’m fucking confused and so so lost ⬇️
#so basicslly heres the thing#girls ive been with are so elusive they never cut to the chase and just tell me their feelings#boys ive done shit with make it very clear from the start whether or not theyre interested in me or just the sex part or just want to chill#like they make it clear or if they happen to change their mind they TELL ME#ive been in love with this girl for like a year now and i have no idea where we stand#at first she was in a relationship with my really close friend when i realized it but when they broke it off it was tough so i didnt act on#anything. but then she started dating snother friend of mine so i couldnt quite do shit about it then either yeah? then she says she needs#alone time so i give it to her ofc like im not gonna confess my feelings if theres nothing to be said of it#then she tells everybody shes gay or thinks she is and im like oh alright fucking sick dude im so happy your happy i just was into you and#it sucks but its selfish of me to not get over it. so i try to stop feeling those feelings and one day were hanging at her condo#and she tells me she likes me and shes like hey friends with benefits is cool with me if its cool with you#and me: with feelings for her IDIOTICALLY AGREES!!#and its been months of that and i just care for her so much and i wish we could be intimate with the feeling being SHARED#and i know its not gonna happen cause shes always talking abt boys and girls that are talking to her and its like DOG#the FUCK do i DO!!!
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