#jason gideon oneshot

[reidsdaisies]

𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐝 (𝐩𝐭. 𝟏)

༉‧´ˎ˗ paring; jason gideon & spencer reid & gn!bau!reader (platonic/father figure type relationship) ༉‧´ˎ˗ summary; Gideon plans to take the youngest members of the team bird watching on the weekend <3 ༉‧´ˎ˗ content warnings; spencer is basically Gideon’s son lol, vague talks of birds and birdwatching LOL. ༉‧´ˎ˗ wc; 0.5k ༉‧´ˎ˗ a/n; idrk what this is it just came to me.. inspired by wheelsup30’s bird watching with Gideon post <3

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You always wondered what agent Gideon got up to in his free time.

You got the answer one day when you were on a case. Gideon, Dr. Reid, and you were heading to an unsub’s dump site when Gideon stopped to look at the sky. He was pointing near the trees, talking in detail to Reid about the birds in the area and revealed to him, and you by proximity, that this was a hobby of his – bird watching.

Their short conversation intrigued you, and prompted you to do some research about different types of birds. Reid had even lent you a book so you could study up on all the species of birds, not without rambling about a few of his favorites as you flipped through the pages.

You’d always liked research, not as much as your favorite doctor does, but it was something you enjoyed. Since joining the team you’ve had less free time to study up on the various topics that intrigue you, but you made time during breaks or slow days.

Later that week, you found yourself enraptured by the book. All the information was really fascinating. You always counted on Reid to know exactly what kind of book would pique your interest. You’d been reading the book all week, nearly through with the massive bird encyclopedia.

Your finger trailed across the page, greedily eating up the information on the page, when Gideon approached, semi-startling you.

“Oh, hi Gideon,” you half-laughed, half-breathed out, pausing to look at your elder.

“That’s a good book. Reid lent it to you?” he inquired, stepping forward to grab the pot of coffee that had been sitting there for about an hour at that point.

“Yup,” you replied. You fixed your posture, pushing up off the counter from your previous position leant over it. Sliding your bookmark in between pages, you shut the book, hugging it to your chest. “I couldn’t stop thinking about that conversation you had with Reid the other week about those pretty little hummingbirds you saw, I had to learn more about them myself.” You explained, picking up your mug as well.

“Hm,” the man hummed.

“I know bits and pieces of info about certain species, but I guess I wasn’t totally interested in them until now.” You laughed, starting to head in the other direction but his voice stopped you.

“Spencer and I were planning on going for a hike over the weekend. The kid needs to touch something other than yellowing pages for a change. Maybe we’ll see some birds you’ve studied up on.”

“Are you inviting me to join you guys?” You tried to hide the fact that your face lit up at the prospect of it. Getting to spend time exercising a hobby you were interested in with an agent you looked up to, and of course his son, the agent you were closest to, sounded like a great way to spend the weekend.

“Yes,” he half-laughed, a small smile on his lips.

“Of course, sir!” You almost hugged him, but you forgot your hands were full and he wasn’t much of a hugger. You stumbled back, laughing at yourself.

You gave a little awkward smile – a silent ‘bye!’ – as he walked off with his mug of coffee.

Let me know your thoughts about this in the comments or my inbox and like & reblog to support! Much love <33

[bunbunbl0gs]

Elle 🖤🖤

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[hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds]

Maybe Gideon interacting with a child/teen reader. Maybe one of the other BAU team members kid??

Jason Gideon X Niece Child Reader

Request: Maybe Gideon interacting with a child/teen reader. Maybe one of the other BAU team members kid??

I need to write more Gideon oneshots.

Third person pov...

The sun was shining, birds were singing, and the slight smell of charcoal and hamburger wafted through the air. It was a beautiful day for a BBQ at Gideon's house. It was a normal Saturday for the team and for once they actually get to enjoy their Saturday

Before the team left for home Gideon invited them and their family round for a BBQ, which surprised the team, but they all agreed.

Currently it was 11am and Gideons niece Y/N was getting ready, the kid was nervous about meeting the team as she hadn't before. The H/C girl was done with her hair and ran downstairs where her uncle was setting up the barbeque.

As she came out she ran over to her uncle. "Uncle I'm ready are they here yet!" She exclaimed making the man jump, he looked behind him and smiles at his energetic niece.

Usually she is on the quiet side but this bargeque is making her excited. "Don't worry Y/N they will ve her every soon, why don't you get some games out ti play with Jack and Henry" he suggests.

Y/Ns smiles grows even wider. "Oh yes I should do that" she said before running to the shed and getting out some games to play.

After that she helped her Uncle bring out the many chairs they need for everyone to sit outside and enjoy the sun.

Each member was bringing something, Derek and Penelope are bringing drinks for both adults and kids, Hotch and his wife Haley were bringing snacks and foodie stuff, Spencer and Emily were bringing games for the kids and anyone else to play.

Finally, JJ and Will were bringing the burgers, hotdogs and other food to be grilled so they wont run out, Henry and Jack are also coming so Y/N has kids her age to play with.

Once the clock hit 11.30am the door bell rang, Y/N jumps over to her Uncle who heard the bell and was walking back inside. "They're here they're here!" Exclaims the young girl.

Gideon laughs as he opens the door, Y/N then goes quiet and hides behind her Uncle. "Hey Gideon!" Exclaimed Derek as he walked in holding drinks for the adults.

Behind him came Penelope woth drinks for the kids "Hello sir" she says politely before running after Derek, next came JJ and Will woth Henry. JJ had the burgers and Will was holding the hot dig buns and other bits. "Thank you for inviting us" Says the Southern man walking after his wife.

After them came Spencer and Emily, "We've got games!" Exclaims the black haired woman making Henry and Penelope cheer, Spencer shook his head and set the game she bought down.

Lastly Hotch and his Wife walk in, Jack runs in and up to Henry the too boys begin talking fast. Hotch was holding snacks for everyone, as was Haley.

Once the food was put down and everyone had a drink and a place to sit, Gideon introduced them to his niece. "Everybody, this is my niece, Y/N” Gideon said, pulling the girl out from behind his legs, She was shy and timid, but the team welcomed her with open arms.

The team members all smiled and welcomed her to the gathering. Y/N seemed a bit shy, but the team was friendly and she eventually came out of her shell.

Y/N was as an only child, so she was delighted to have such a large group of people over to her uncle's house. She watched as the team ate, laughed, and talked. She was amazed by how everyone seemed to get along so well, like a family.

Throughout the day, Y/N hung around the team, listening to their stories and asking them questions.

She was especially interested in how the BAU team solved their cases. Of course her Uncle had told he rmany of them but was happy to hear them from everyone else.

As the team enjoyed their BBQ and getting to know Y/N, Hotch and JJ brought over their sons to meet Y/N, Henry and Jack instantly ran up to Y/N and they all quickly became friends.

The H/C girl lit up when she was playing with Hotch and JJ’s kids, they decided to play football, Y/N was pretty good she was always a quick runner.

The team laughed and talked as they watched the children play. This was more than just a BBQ now; it was a family gathering. Everyone was happy to have a chance to meet Gideon’s niece and relax for the day which no cases.

The sun eventually began to set and it was time for everybody to go home. One by one, the BAU team members said their goodbyes and took their leave. But before leaving, Gideon smiled and told Y/N that they would stay in touch and they would have another gathering soon.

The BAU team left Gideon’s house feeling content and special. They had all enjoyed their BBQ and meeting Y/N.

Before leaving Jack and Henry surprised their parents by hugging Y/N goodbye, each member had taken many pictures throughout the day to remember how much fun they had.

The team left with smiles on their faces. this BBQ was definitely one to remember, after clearing up Y/N was getting ready for bed when her Uncle knocked.

"Come in!" She exclaimed jumping onto her bed, Gideon walked in a smile on his usually neutral face. "Did you have fun today Y/N?" He asks her already knowing the answer.

The little girl grinned up at him. "Yes definitely the best fun I ever had Uncle" she says, Gideon then tucks her into bed.

"I'm glad, good night sparrow" he says kissing her forehead ans turning out the light. "Good night Uncle" Says Y/N before closing her eyes ans falling asleep.

The end!

Hope you liked this oneshot as usual so sorry for the grammar and Spelling mistakes!

Request are open!

Wors count: 1042

[spencersweatervest]

seatbelt (spencer/derek) - 100 ways to say i love you

2. "put your seatbelt on"

"put your seatbelt on." derek says, glancing over at him critically, and spencer rolls his eyes, but complies.

"you know, for all of your nagging at me to wear these things, you're an awfully bad driver." spencer counters, tapping his finger once against the seat as his seatbelt clicks.

"oh, shut up." he mutters and spencer chuckles, "i do because i'm a bad driver."

i want you to be safe, i don't want you getting hurt, he doesn't say, but the corners of spencer's eyes soften, so maybe he knows.

"be a better driver," is what he counters with, and derek rolls his eyes, copying him in a bad impression under his breath.

[maraudersmary]

Never to Return - Spencer Reid Oneshot

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary - Spencer Reid was digging his own grave. Did he have it in him to survive? - Spencer's thoughts during the end of his time with Hankel

No pairings

CW - non-con drug use, drug use, implied drug addiction, cravings, suicidal thoughts, canon-compliant violence, guns, torture

Word count - 1 042

A/N - this is my first criminal minds fic and I wrote it very quickly this evening with no beta or editing oops, so don't expect amazing literature. It is somewhat canon-compliant. Also this is the opening to the Brand New City one shot I'm writing but I thought this worked well as a stand alone too. Let me know what you think <3

Read under the cut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nothing was real. Everything was real. Spencer didn’t know, he wasn’t sure if he cared. He just wanted it to end. He didn’t want to die, at least he didn't to begin with, but if it meant an end to his torture at the hands of a man he couldn't help but feel sorry for, then he would welcome the reaper with open arms. If he was able, he’d register that as a scary thought, but his brain was too clouded with dread and drugs. He thought he was outside, digging, digging his own grave, but he could be certain of nothing. Not since the hallucinations started. Whatever Tobias had given him must have been mixed with a psychedelic; a realisation he’d had whilst still coherent enough. Countless number of doses later and Spencer had no idea what was real and what was not. Spencer was almost grateful for that. The drugs mixed with his exhaustion made him feel like he was floating, like he was observing his pain not feeling it. Despite being so vehemently against the drugs to begin with, he now craved them to lessen his pain. The old Spencer would know what that craving meant, but Tobias was right, they do help, and that was all he cared about.

Spencer didn’t know how long he’d been with Hankel, but had long ago given up hope of being found. The team would have moved on by now. Quickly grieved the loss of their friend and then gotten back to saving the lives of the people who still had a chance. As far as Spencer knew, he was gone. Never to return. He had just about given up, resigned himself to digging his own grave and going out in a hazy battle that he would not fight against, could not fight against. He was too tired, too weak, too damaged to continue to dig, never mind fight his captor. He gave the shovel to Charles, not Tobias, to finish his burial site, not even alive enough anymore to fear his own impending death. Maybe this was always his fate. The smartest person on the team to go out due to his own stupidity. It seemed pointless to fight fate, it would only chase him until he eventually relented. Coming to terms with the fate about to befall him (it’s funny, he thought, that he was still not blaming Hankel, but instead whatever deities decided this was the path for him), he send out one last message in his mind to his mother. She was his world and if he had one regret about where he had ended up, it would be that he was abandoning her to survive this cruel world alone.

He didn’t notice the flashlights of his team, the shouts of his name from his family, too caught up in thoughts about his mother. For the first time since he started digging, he felt a heavy sadness about what he was leaving behind. She had done his best for a young Spencer, nurturing him with an ocean of knowledge whilst fighting impossible demons in her own mind, until eventually she couldn’t fight them anymore. Spencer placed no blame on his mother, held no hurt at having to care for her when he still needed caring for. It was simple to him as a child, she was sick and he could protect her. He got older and realised that she needed more than he could give, despite how he would give her the world if he could, but he never stopped longing to protect her. And he knew she would want him to protect himself now, to fight for himself like he fought for her. It was like he could hear her now. Maybe he could, he stopped trying to decipher delusions from reality a long time ago. She was telling him he had so much left to do, so much left to see, so many more people to love. Spencer wasn’t sure that was true. In his twenty four years of life he’d felt almost nothing but depression and guilt, but suddenly he wasn’t sure that was all he wanted his life story to be. ‘Spencer Reid, a genius with an IQ of 187, had so much left to offer the world’ he heard Hotch say in the back of his mind. Past tense. Was he already dead? If this was death then maybe it wasn’t so bad, it was almost comfortable. Like he was finally at peace after so long. Until Hotch’s words registered in his mind. ‘so much left to offer the world’. He pondered whether that was true, until his eyes latched onto something laying innocently on the floor. Except it wasn't an innocent item. It was an item that held the power of the Gods. Or was it the person holding the object who harnessed the power of the Gods? Spencer didn’t have the ability to analyse that right now. All he had was a sudden urge to live. To prove Hotch right; that he did have so much more to offer. To see his mother one more time to tell her that he would strive to see, do, and love more. And so as if possessed by the reaper of death, Spencer reached down and harnessed the power of the Gods for possibly his last time.

He was aiming. He was shooting. He was apologising. He was in the arms of his boss, telling him he knew he would understand. He didn’t know that. All he had was hope. Faith. Trust. He was in JJ’s arms. Pushing away her apologies for his own foolishness, just glad she was okay. He was looking into Morgans eyes. He was being held up by Gideon. He was asking for a minute with Tobias. Not Charles, not Raphael, but the innocent man whose own mind was held hostage just as Spencer was. But he wasn’t really asking for a minute with Tobias. He figured it would just add another layer to his blanket of guilt. He could live with that, but he couldn’t live without the drugs. Not yet anyway.

Spencer Reid had left that cabin in the woods, but he was still gone. Never to return.

[lapseinrecs]

Defect

By kikkimax

On Archive of Our Own

Status: Complete; Oneshot; 39,694 words; 1st part in Defect Trilogy series

Summary: Dean is captured by the FBI just as his time runs out. Sam is determined his brother won't go to hell. He has a plan and the colt, but no more magic bullets.

My thoughts: !!! I appreciate Gideon sometimes okay.

[andforthecoating]

►These things take time

ao3 saw it first

Summary: 4 times Gideon stops Elle from calling him dad and the one time he lets her.

Relationships: Elle Greenaway & Jason Gideon, Elle Greenaway / Spencer Reid

Word count: 1618

i.

They’re on the phone the first time it happens. There’s a case, like most days, and Elle is stuck with Morgan in the SUV they always end up driving. He’s been blasting music for the last twenty minutes, so when the phone rings Elle is quite happy to hear the signal. She motions for Morgan, who’s not heard the signal, to pause the cd player as she picks up the phone and checks the caller ID.

“Hey Gideon!”

“Are you on your way to the crime scene?”

“Yeah, we’re driving there now. Care to brief us?” She says and out of the corner of her eye she can see Morgan snickering.

“The victim is Peter Andersen, white male, 43 years old. Stabbed multiple times in the abdomen. We think the unsub is still in the area.”

He pauses and Elle takes it for what it is, a warning, and most likely the end of the briefing.

“Ok, anything else?”

She can hear him breathing in and then, with a voice laced with worry, he says

“Be careful.”

And honestly she can’t take the way he sounds so genuine, can’t take the way it makes her stomach twist. So she sighs exasperatedly and rolls her shoulders, satisfied when they make a small cracking noise.

“Yes, dad.”

“Not your dad, Greenaway.”

ii.

She’s sitting beside Reid. Up until five minutes ago they had been together in companionable silence, which had now been disturbed.

The paramedic who had previously forgotten about her is on her like a hawk and insisting he take her to the hospital. She knows it’s stupid but she wishes the paramedic would leave her alone a bit more.

Elle’s really not that hurt except for the gash in her forehead, which isn’t even bleeding that much anymore. And the headache, but she has those all the time. So really, she’s not that hurt.

When she spots Gideon walking over to them, she can feel a small sliver of hope burning in her chest. If it were Hotch she wouldn’t even ask, but with Gideon, she thinks there might be a small chance he’ll help her.

“Gideon, will you please tell him that I don't need to go to the hospital?”

“Regulations are regulations.” He says sternly before looking her up and down. If Elle didn’t know better she’d say he looks concerned: “You're all right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, dad.” And, God, didn’t that slip out a little too easily. She can feel Reid tensing beside her even though he’s trying to cover it by faking a small shiver.

Gideon is the one to break the silence:

“Hey Elle?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ever call me ‘dad’ again.” He says.

As she watches his retreating back she turns to Reid, who’s stayed right next to her for the whole conversation, albeit a little awkwardly. She smiles a little, shakes her head, and deadpans:

“How do you think he’d feel about ‘mom’?”

That earns her a lopsided smile and a:

“Let me know when you’re going to do that so I can uh- run.”

iii.

The team is in the conference room when it happens. It’s been a rough couple of days and Elle knows they’re starting to take a toll on her.

She knows because when Reid asked if she wanted sugar in her coffee this morning, she’d said yes. Today, she might actually have a shot at beating his standing record of the amount of sugar in one cup of coffee. She and Morgan have been trying to one-up each other on that front for months, but she usually can’t take more than two sugars and Morgan never manages to finish his coffee when he tries.

“Elle, you take Reid and go over the evidence the Philly PD sent us.”

Elle looks up from her coffee, the spoon in her hand still swirling around in the cup. She shakes her head a few times to try and get rid of the fog in her head.

“Yeah, dad- I mean… dad. Uhh- Jason! Sir.” She can hear Morgan snickering behind her, and honestly, isn’t this just great. Spencer (and when did he become Spencer?) gives her a small, shy smile before he too lets out a quiet giggle.

“Just Gideon, Elle,” Gideon affirms and just like that Morgan’s outright chuckling.

As if the mortification of saying the wrong title at 7am wasn’t enough.

Elle slides down a few inches in her chair and stretches her legs, aiming to kick Spencer under the table, while attempting to send a murderous look Morgan’s way. She probably doesn’t look as intimidating as she wants to.

vi.

Spencer is sitting in his desk chair while Elle’s taken the liberty to sit on his desk, her legs dangling off the end and awkwardly brushing against his knees. The coffee cup his hands are wrapped around has ‘pretty high degree’ written on it in bold black letters. According to Elle, it’s the best cup they have in the office- and it’s definitely not just because she has the best humour of the team and had bought it specifically with him in mind.

Her phone rings, disturbing the peace and quiet (or as much of it she can get at the BAU). From across the room, she can hear Morgan whistling.

“Not a boyfriend,” and then, because she’s a tease and she loves to balance the scales “I’m interested in someone else, actually.”

She can see Morgan’s eyebrows raising.

”Get off it, Morgan.” She sighs “I don’t think he likes me anyway.”

“It’s actually highly unlikely that he doesn’t like you. It’s called reciprocal liking, if he thinks you like him, then he’ll start to like you even more. And some peo- “

“Reid,” she interrupts with laughter in her voice, “thank you. But I don’t want someone to like me just because I like them.” She pauses for a moment: “Besides, I’m pretty sure this guy doesn’t fall into the statistics.”

Spencer takes a sip of his probably diabetic inducing coffee and looks up at her.

“Most people do. That’s the point of statistics.”

“I guess so,” she amends, in an attempt

To end the conversation. She has to get out- and fast. ”I’m getting more coffee, want some?”

“Please,” he says and hands her his cup.

Elle grabs her own disregarded cup from beside her on the desk and hops off it, thankful when she doesn’t upend the whole desk. She makes her way into the kitchen seemingly normally but she can feel the ghost of their conversation as a weight. It’s not that she cares what Spencer thinks, not really, but it’s also the fact that she does care.

It’s all too confusing for 2 o'clock in the afternoon so she settles for pouring the coffee from the coffee pot, trying to silence her thoughts. Just as she’s taking out the creamer from the fridge she feels someone’s presence behind her in the kitchen.

She turns around; Spencer’s cup in one hand, creamer in the other and the fridge door wide open.

“How are you?” Gideon asks and he looks genuinely concerned in the way only he can- where it’s phrased like a throwaway question and you can’t really see the tenderness behind it unless you know what to look for.

“I-“ she hadn’t realised she’d been choked up but as she tries to answer him she is made acutely aware of the overwhelming something she feels. “I just don’t think Reid’s right, you know,” she settles for and takes a deep breath.

“Well, it’s only human to be wrong.”

“I know,” she sighs and turns back to the coffee, closing the fridge door as she does so, and seeming the conversation over.

“And, Elle?” Gideon says and she looks over once again at where he’s standing in the arch-way to the kitchen with a knowing gleam in his eyes, “Any boy would be lucky to have you.”

She swallows, shock probably written plain across her face. Sure they’re all profilers and Gideon’s been on the job for longer than any of them but she still can’t quite fathom how he got it right on the nose.

“Yeah, yeah I know,” she elbows him after a moment, before mockingly adding “dad.”

“Elle, I’ve told you not to call me that.”

+ i

Gideon stays behind in the hospital, even though he can feel his eyelids drooping. He wants to blame it on the lack of sleep but, if he’s honest with himself, it’s mostly because he knows Elle’s in there, fighting for her life. She’s out of surgery now but he’d insisted on being there until she’d woken.

People can say whatever they want about Gideon (old, naive, fatherly) and most of it would be right, as proven by how his back is starting to hurt from the plastic hospital chair.

“Dad?”

An unsure voice permeates the deafening silence of the hospital room and Gideon lifts his head from where it’s been resting against his hands and is met with an awakened Elle.

Gideon takes her hand in his larger ones, almost hiding them from sight, and lets out a relieved sigh. She looks so, so fragile, as if she’ll flicker away any second. Her eyes are bloodshot and skin is sickly pale. He can see the bandages peeking through where her shirt has bundled up and he resists the urge to straighten it.

She looks horrible but at least she’s alive- she’s alive and she will recover- and that’s all that matters right now. He takes another steadying breath and squeezes her hands.

“Yeah, I’m here Elle. You’re safe.”

[swanimagines]

FREDDY CARTER'S CHARACTERS AO3 SERIESES

Just in case because people seem to keep forgetting I write for all of his current characters, or then they think I don't write for others than Kaz and Pin anymore and come up to say they're sad about it 😅 I realised that me not having a common post for all of his characters may, again, make people think I no longer write for them.

So, I still write for all of his characters and will love you forever if you request stuff for them!

I DO NOT WRITE FOR FREDDY HIMSELF, THE ACTOR X READERS!! PLEASE STOP ASKING!

Just because I met him does NOT mean I'm comfortable writing for him. I refuse to be called "selfish" for it. I also will not stand insulting other authors who do write Freddy x reader writers, I don't care if you don't like their writing style and "need" my style for Freddy fics. I have boundaries, and writing RPF is one of my boundaries. Please get that into your heads.

Kaz Brekker

Click here to check out/sub/bookmark my multichapter Kaz story - Bastard and the Blood Princess. It isn't included in my Kaz series because my Kaz series folder/Grishaverse series folder is for fics shorter than 5 chapters, mostly oneshots. Bastard and the Blood Princess has one, long, continuous story and not all people may like the plot, opposed to oneshots/short stuff where each fic has its own plot. So to avoid too much hassle, you need to sub/bookmark BatBP in its own work if you want to get notified for updates for it. I will add BatBP to the Kaz + Grishaverse serieses once the whole thing is out.

Pin Hawthorne

Jason Ripper

Tom (15 Days)

Ellis (The Convent)

Gideon Fletcher

David Friedkin (coming)

Possibly more characters to be added. (A clarification just in case: I do not write RPF/fics for the actor, Freddy Carter himself)

Freddy's characters preferences

Preference means there's a scenario, and I'll tell you how different characters would act like with you in those situations. Situation examples may be: your first date with them, them having a crush on you, them when you get injured somehow, them finding you asleep on their bed. Right now including: Kaz Brekker, Pin Hawthorne, Jason Ripper, Tom from 15 Days and Ellis from the Convent. More characters may get added if he potrays more (fictional) people who I feel like writing for. I will also possibly update my old preference sets and add those new characters into them as new characters come.

For anyone who's concerned, THESE ARE NOT ONESHOT COLLECTIONS, they are made using AO3's "series" feature.

If you want to be informed about new fics for any of Freddy's characters I currently write for, create an AO3 account and subscribe or bookmark any of those serieses listed above. There are buttons at the top right corner for those, or on top on mobile. I do not do Tumblr taglists anymore.

Also, if you're wondering, requests are ALWAYS open and you're welcome to leave one or multiple. Just remember to read my rules and pick a request type from this list.

[kjthenerd]

‘The unbreakable man’ - Aaron Hotchner angst fic 5x09

This took me like 2 hours to write. It was my own spin off on multiple episodes, with some links to Hotch’s childhood as we never got to see it. It’s my first completed, long oneshot so let me know how I did. Hope you all have a good day <3

———————————————————

Not everybody knew the details of Hotch’s childhood. They could figure some aspects out because of their profiling skills sure, but Hotch never spoke about it. They knew he had problems with his brother, and that he had met Haley in theatre, but that was it.

The first time Hotch had been confronted about it was after his interrogation with Vincent Perotta. Gideon knew. Hotch knew he knew. The conversation had been a swift one, Hotch obviously wanted to lock the feelings in his heart back up as quick as possible and get home to Haley and Jack. Gideon understood.

“Hotch.” He had said. “You won’t turn out to be like your father.” Hotch had given a stoic nod of his head in return and wished the man a goodnight.

After that, Gideon had noticed some other things about the young man. Hotch always took on the burn ward. No matter how deeply it hurt him each time. He always went. Gideon knew that seeing Charlotte die had affected Hotch more than he’d like to admit. He knew he identified with Abby. He saw the tears in Hotch’s eyes, the unspeakable fear, the regret of not seeing the warning signs of Abby’s actions beforehand. Having to physically restrain Hotch from running inside a burning warehouse had told Gideon all he needed. Abby leaving an envelope for Hotch to give to his son had almost been Aaron’s breaking point. But we didn’t let himself break. He never did.

Then Gideon had left, leaving nothing but his gun, badge and a note for Spencer. Hotch understood. Of course he did. But part of him despised the fact that he was partly able to admit that he was angry Jason didn’t come and speak to him. He had shared secrets with that man over the years. He had been one of his mentors. And all he got was Erin Strauss saying that ‘Jason Gideons resignation from the Bureau was now official.’ He was fuming, in all honesty. Haley was gone. He had failed as a husband and as a father. The man who had promised him he wouldn’t turn out to be like his father was also gone. So now what?

David Rossi. A man of wisdom, yet unpredictability. Hotch had to admit he was extremely happy for his mentor to be back. Though he couldn’t understand why. Perhaps it was because he wouldn’t be doing double his paperwork anymore - though it did give a distraction from things at home, it was tedious. Maybe it was because he now had someone else on the team who truly understood him. Rossi knew about Hotch’s father, way before anyone else. When Hotch was a rookie in the BAU, the old team were having a takeaway after a particularly gruelling case. They had been talking about their childhoods and when it had came round for Hotch to speak, he had only really spoken about his mother. But that was it. Rossi had put it together then. The overachieving, workaloholic, who put everyone’s elses needs before his own. Aaron was like that because of the environment he had grew up in. It all made sense.

The time that Rossi had almost seen Hotch break was the continuation of the George Foyet case. All those people he had murdered on that bus because Hotch had enough balls to not take his stupid deal. Though, maybe if Hotch wasn’t so stubborn, those people would still be alive. There wasn’t a way to know. So when Hotch had walked off, Rossi following behind him, he allowed himself to break a little bit. “Dave i had ten years to do something about it!” Hotch had emphasised. Dave had merely gave him a lecture and told him that “the voice in the back of your head isn’t your conscience, it’s your ego!” Hotch supposed he was right. He quickly collected himself and carried on working the case. But then Morgan had gotten hurt. Hotch had felt like a hypocrite, telling him to let it go when they were on the jet. But he was unit chief. And he still had a job to do. Foyet had escaped. But that’s okay. Hotch had caught him once, he could catch him again.

Or so he thought. He couldn’t remember what had happened. They had gotten back from the atrocious farm case, and Hotch had gone straight to his apartment. He had poured himself a small glass of alcohol and as he had gone to drink it, he had heard the click of a gun. He knew it was Foyet. Only he would have the intelligence to break into Hotch’s apartment without him knowing. He couldn’t fully remember what had happened. What he could recall was how it stung, like millions of wasps and bees were attacking his body, and he couldn’t do anything to get them off. Then, it was the slow, torturous burning sensation that filled his torso. He could recall the thick, sticky blood dripping mercilessly down his chest, staining the carpet beneath him. His heartbeat had been pounding, if it wasn’t careful, it might have jumped out of his chest through the countless stab wounds Foyet had inflicted. He tried to focus on his heartbeat, to stay conscious. But eventually, it was easier to just succumb to unconsciousness.

When he came to, he was in a hospital bed, with bandages all over his torso and his arms. The beeping of the heart machine assured him he had survived. Though he wasn’t surprised. He knew Foyet would keep him alive. This was only a warning afterall. Prentiss had been the one to find him. The rest of the team had came by too, aswell as Haley and Jack. He had to look Haley in the eye, the first time since their divorce, and tell her that she had to go into witness protection with Jack. She had broken down. Asking what the hell she was supposed to tell Jack, and how was she supposed to raise him with nobody there to help her. It took everything in Hotch not to cry, he could only give an answer to one question. “Tell him you’re taking a holiday, and that it won’t be for very long.” Hotch had advised. He had promised Haley that he’d catch Foyet, and that he’d spend the rest of his life making it up to her. He had assured Jack his daddy was okay, and that him and mommy were going to take a little trip and he’d see him soon. Then they had left. Rossi had earlier stood in the doorway of his hospital room, and promised him they’d catch Foyet. Hotch clinged onto it like a little kid holding their teddy when they were scared. He had to.

But promises turned out to be empty words. Hotch should’ve known that. The amount of times his mother had promised to leave his father. The amount of times Sean said he’d change. The amount of times he’d been promised things would get easier. Yet, when the time came, he still promised Haley he would show Jack love, because that one he would live to keep. The sobbing, and then the gunshots rang through his ears, and dug deep into his soul, like a soldier in the trenches. They wouldn’t be going anywhere for a long time. But like a soldier, he still had fight left in him. The anger he had built up over the years could now help him. He fought Foyet, not for his life, but for Jack’s. He had promised Haley he’d show Jack love, and he had to kill Foyet to keep that promise. He had shot his gun, but the bullets had no impact on the vest he was wearing. It came down to hand to hand combat. Hotch, in that moment, thanked his father for beating into him resiliency. He had taken all of the punches and kicks Fouet had given him, and returned them ten times as hard on Foyet. He showed no mercy. Like the world had never showed mercy to him. He punched and punched and punched, until strong muscular arms had forced him to stop. Then he broke. He wept. He was broken. Aaron Hotchner had broken.

He hugged Haley’s corpse, hating himself for the fact that it was now a corpse. He had ran to where he had secretly told Jack to hide. He hadn’t ever been a religious man, but he knew Gideon had been. In the moments before opening the wooden chest, Aaron had prayed to God that Jack would be safe and sound in there. And miraculously, it worked. “I worked the case daddy.”

Hotch and Jack had slept at Rossi’s that night. Dave insisted. He made sure they had both ate as well as they could. He let them have their space. Then, Hotch had put Jack to bed. Now it was just Dave and Aaron, like it had been in the past, sitting in Dave’s enormous living room. Aaron had always admired the architecture of Dave’s home, and had often wished his had looked the same. But then again, he wasn’t a best selling author. His father would have been so disappointed in him. He had fucked up someone elses life, just like he had predicted. He was an awful person. He should have never tried to help people, it always ended up making things worse.

“Aaron.” Dave said, concerned. The young man looked up at his mentor, tears filling his eyes. Panic had already began pumping from his heart, filling all the arteries and veins in his body. Someone had tied a noose around his chest. He couldn’t breathe. Was he dying? No. He had to be alive for Jack. He had promised Haley, and he had already broken too many promises to her.

“Aaron you need to breathe.” Dave said, grabbing Aaron’s hand, only for him to jump back and curl up on himself at the end of the couch. “I- can’t - I - I’m dying.” Aaron sputtered out, clasping his hand to his chest. Dave slowly moved closer.

“You’re not dying Aaron. You’re having a panic attack.”

“I AM DYING!” Aaron shouted back, voice rich with emotion. “I’M BECOM- BECOMING JUST LIKE HIM DAVE! I- I - I…”

“Aaron!” Dave shouted back, “You ARE NOT YOUR FATHER!”

“I KILLED A MAN WITH MY OWN BEAR HANDS!” Hotch sobbed, his breathing becoming more sporadic by the second.

“Aaron. You need to breathe. In…” Dave exaggerated his breath, “Out…”

Aaron tried to copy his mentors breathing, but failed. “I- I’m sorry, ‘m pathetic.”

Dave ignored him, continuing to exaggerate his breathing. When that didn’t seem to work, he cautiously took Aaron’s trembling hand in his, and put it on his heart.

“Focus on my heartbeat. Focus on my breathing. That’s all you need to do.”

Aaron could follow those simple instructions. He could do that. He wasn’t that pathetic.

Minutes past before Aaron’s breathing became somewhat stable. Face glossed with sweat and tears, and eyes raw, he slouched back on the couch. His hand was now holding a plastic bucket, in case he needed to throw up. A water bottle was pressed into his other hand.

“Drink. I bet the hyperventilating made you light-headed.” Dave said softly, returning to sit next to Aaron.

“Dave, I..” Aaron started.

“Stop.” Dave cut him off, “Don’t apologise. Not today. Not ever. You’re not pathetic. You’re not like you’re father. You’re not fucked up.”

Aaron gave a huff of air in response. Dave always somehow knew what Aaron was thinking. “I knew you knew.”

“Of course I knew Aaron.” Dave said.

“When?” Aaron asked, taking a sip of his water.

“About 6 months after you joined the unit, the team went out for a takeaway after a bad case.” Dave began to explain.

“I remember. The case in Florida.” Aaron said.

“We were discussing our childhoods, and when it got to you, you only mentioned your mother. More specifically, what she would make you for breakfast.” Dave laughed, finishing his sentence. “Then it all clicked in my head. I knew what that man did to you before he died.”

Aaron nodded his head in reponse. “You know, my biggest fear was to turn out to be like him. It’s why I got into law, then the FBI. I had to make sure that I wasn’t to be like him.” Dave let nodded his head, encouraging him to continue. “But it was all for nothing. I.. I killed a man with my own bare hands Dave. I.. all that anger built up inside of me… what if it hurts Jack? What if I hurt Jack and don’t even realise it? I mean… I already took his mother away from him..”

Aaron’s eyes began to tear up again. He had finally voiced the fear that had been following him all his life. And the one persom who could either make or break it was now infront of him.

“Aaron, you are nothing like him. Your father… he beat you because he was a jackass. No other explanation. You were an innocent kid, who couldn’t fight back. Foyet wasn’t. He was a bastard who murdered lots of people, including the mother of your child. You could have let the anger out before Foyet, yet who kept it controlled until you figured you could use it for the greater good. It’s out now. It can’t hurt Jack.” Dave answered wisely. Aaron gulped. He knew, rationally, Dave was right. But the guilt he felt, breaking down his soul was still there. It was always going to be there. But the fear, that he would end up to be like his father had been slightly lifted.

“Lean on your team Aaron.” Dave advised, “Morgan has been doing an amazing job as Unit Chief, and you have friends to go to for help. Including me. It’ll all turn out to be okay.”

Aaron nodded his head, too exhausted to answer. It had been too much emotion for one day. Emotions, locked away for decades had came out today. Maybe for the better, maybe for the worse. But there was a small glimmer of hope in his heart, even if he himself didn’t realise it, that everything would be okay. That was his final thought before he lost the battle to exhaustion.

[fairyellieee]

What I think being in a relationship with Elle Greenaway would look/feel like with a NonBAU!Reader

She's very intimidating but once you get to know her it'll make sense how she's always intimidating but of course you have the privilege of being in her soft spot.

The both of you first met at a beach, she was dancing (sexily) with a guy when you were going to get some drinks for you and your friends. She then suddenly came over to you and asked your name. Started flirting with you by the next few hours and with a few drinks it ended up with you in bed with her.

Nothing happened of course, as much as you wanted something to happen with her while the both of you are in bed she said "I won't take advantage of you while you're drunk"

Then that's where it all started, the next morning after said night in bed with her. You woke up with a breakfast in bed with a beautiful view of her sitting next to you.

She then asked you out on a date which was a romantic date on a beach.

Cuddles lots of it.

Lots of story about her past job and current job at the BAU.

Protective

Very hot at the same time adorable whenever she's frustrated.

Meeting her mom in New York was very scary because you didn't exactly grew up on a city and know their habits and stuff.

That anxiousness went out the door once her mom hugged you as she opens the door and compliments you.

She then started scolding Elle for how skinny she is and started serving her more and more food, the same goes to you.

Her mom then started talking to you about how Elle used to be such a nerd in highschool. How she collected sea shell in the beach (now you know why she likes the beach very much) and she started blushing very profusely.

Teaching you spanish.

Vacation on Cuba with her mom.

Going to her father's grave and telling him stories about your relationship and her current status.

Meeting with the team at their annual dinner.

Morgan teasing Elle how he was right that she did have a partner.

Hotch teasing Elle about how she should've just confessed that she was taken.

Penelope gushing over how you're very good looking.

You being on elle's side the whole dinner while Gideon tells story about his past.

Getting fascinated with the statistics and facts the resident genius rambled about.

Moving in with Elle after a few months of dating because why not?

Dates every Friday when there's no case.

She bought you a puppy and a cat once you started begging her to buy you one.

Her scolding you when she found out that you let the pets sleep on the bed whenever she's not at home.

You and the pets giving her the cute begging eyes and her just sighing and cuddled with the three of you.

She's your home and no one can take her from you.

[hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds]

Could I request something with Gideon as a gender neutral readers father figure? Maybe they haven't had a stable parent in their life or maybe their parent was abusive? And either way Gideon kinda like takes care of the reader like their his own kid xx

Jason Gideon X Teen reader

Another Gideon one!

Request: Could I request something with Gideon as a gender neutral readers father figure? Maybe they haven't had a stable parent in their life or maybe their parent was abusive? And either way Gideon kinda like takes care of the reader like their his own kid xx

Third person pov...

When Y/N was 4 years old they meet Jason Gideon, his team were in new Orleans investigating something about a serial killer who is on the loose kidnapping woman only keeping them for a couple days before killing them brutality.

The only thing they had was video footage off the woman meeting a 4 year old toddler and then walking off with the kid, the team were stumped for ideas, as they were pouring over clues and trying to find the kid in newspapers, school records, but nothing it was as if the toddler never existed.

Currently 4 year old Y/N L/N was home playing with their toys when their dad comes barging in, the man was angry, he had just dumped the body off his latest victim she wasn't good enough.

The man turned to his 4 year old casually playing, the pissed of man crushes the child's toys under his shoes as he makes his way towards the child, said child notices and quickly stands up cowering below the man.

"you stupid useless bastard! She was wrong!" he yells slapping the child forcing the toddler to the floor, the child doesn't make a sound as they land on the floor, vison going blurry for a second before being dragged up by the arm.

The child winces in pain as their already hurt arm is squeezed hard. Their father yanks their face up, angry eyes look at their emotionless face. "next time you better find me a better one or your next!" he yells before shoving the child away.

He didn't care as the chid lays motionless on the carpet, the door slams behind the man leaving Y/N alone. Slowly the toddler pulls themselves up and pulls their knees towards their body crying softly.

They've had enough, enough killing and pain, they had to escape, escape for good otherwise they would die, the child waits a couple of minutes making sure their dad wont come back out. "we leave" they whisper the dirty bunny in their hands, if was their only gift from their mum.

The toddler never met her but their dad misses the woman everyday and is always trying to find someone like her to be Y/Ns mother, the man uses his toddler to fine and bring the woman to him.

The 4 year old stands up, holding their bunny tightly they reach for the handle and open it quietly it opens, holding their breath the child escapes and runs far away from the house as they run they run across the crime scene their dad created.

The 4 year old gets closer they spot two people they don't recognise with the police, the H/C toddler knew the police department a lot as they are always getting called to their house by neighbours.

As the child watches with the group of people officer Jim sees them. "Y/N! what are you doing here" he exclaims running to the child, once he gets close he reaches down and picks up the 4 year old, he doesn't see the flinch the 4 year old gives but Jason Gideon does.

The agent eyes the child in the officers' arms, it was the kid from the tapes he gives a look to Reid before walking over. "Hello there little one" he says smiling at the child, he got a smile back surprising officer. "that's a first Y/N smiling at a stranger." Says the officer.

Gideon looks at Y/N, he sees how they hold on to the man with only one hand while the other dangles and looks like someone had grabbed and twisted the other. 

Y/N watches the man infront on them, as they hold tightly onto Officer Jim, they get a sense of trust from the man. "Hello Y/N, I'm Jason Gideon FBI" Says the man Y/Ns eyes widened.

Know wonder their dad is more annoyed the FBI are there, as the child watches him Gideon sees them mouth 'help me'

The man is soon reaching out slowly for the toddler so they don't get scared. The officer let's go of the child and Y/N relaxes once they are in thr Agents arms of course being careful of their arm.

Gideon then walks towards the SUV where Spencer Reid was waiting for him, he is confused when he sees Gideon carrying a toddler.

"Reid this is Y/N, kid this is Spencer he is also an Agent" introduces Gideon, then recognition flashes in Spencers brain as he takes a good look at the child.

He then whispers to Gideon once the child was sat in the trunk of the car. "Gideon that's the child from the video" Says the Dr, Gideon nods.

"And I think they are being abused" mumbles the man making Spencer look over at the child, suddenly a man yelling can be heard. Lolkng around Gideon spots a man he was surrounded by the officers.

Gideon looks back at Y/N the kid is trying to hid from the voice yelling for them, the toddler was shaking like mad.

Gideon then runs over to the lead detective and tells them that the man was abusing his kid.

After that once the 4 year old was treat at the hospital and arm wrapped in a cast they told Gideon what their dad made them do and how he was the Unsub.

Gideon felt a connection with the kid and couldn't leave them alone, since then he adopted the child as his own.

Now being 14 years old Y/N Gideon is safe from their abusive dad and is living in Virginia with a happier life.

Of course the trauma is still there but the teen knows they can go go their Dad for help.

The end!

Hope you liked this oneshot so sorry for the wait and as usual sorry for the grammar and Spelling mistakes.

Request are open!

Word count: 1050

[spencersweatervest]

THAT ONE TIME SPENCER REID ACCIDENTALLY PUNCHED DEREK IN THE FACE (AND OTHER MOMENTS) [ONE-SHOT]

character(s): spencer reid, elle greenaway, aaron hotchner, emily prentiss, luke alvez (criminal minds), penelope garcia, david rossi, michael lamontagne, derek morgan (criminal minds), jason gideon, jennifer "jj" jareau

tags: lesbian emily prentiss, bisexual spencer reid, it's barely implied just making sure you understood it WAS implied (she says as if it's not canon), crack in the sense that there is literally no point to this whatsoever, spencer reid has secrets, fluff, friendship, face punching, nutcracking

summary: jj wonders when she will stop letting spencer surprise her. she's already figured out that he can do more surprisingly odd things then she would've expected - throughout the years, she's caught on pretty quickly that there's more to him than meets the eye. / or, five secret "talents" the others didn't know spencer had.

i. nutcracking (walnuts, not men)

somebody - somebody whose first and last initials are pg and is the only somebody who would actually do this - buys hotch a nutcracker for christmas.

whether it's supposed to be a gag joke or not still has yet to be determined since it's been sitting in his office for years, but he doesn't immediately throw it away and/or look at with complete disgust and disappointment, so it must not have been a total fail.

it's a pink, two foot tall statue with blue eyes and its teeth pulled back like it's permanently grimacing, and is actually one of the ugliest things ever, but garcia smiles like she's all delighted when he opens it, and they do actually have nuts from gift baskets everyone had gotten from, funnily enough, gideon, so they'd all ended up using it. more than once.

it's a late night, almost one in the morning, because the case they'd been working on was long and they all still had paperwork to fill out. jingle bells is playing appropriately from the bau office's speakers and everyone is kind of gathered in the bullpen around the center desks. they sift through papers and files, pretending not to see elle slip spencer some of hers, a dull light from hotch's office illuminating everything, and piles of walnuts in sections between every other person.

derek reaches for a handful, throwing them at elle as she takes forever loading hers into the nutcracker, one at a time.

"hurry up." he says, and she sticks her tongue out at him, like the five year old she is. maybe putting them next to each other wasn't the greatest idea.

when she finally finishes, he takes it from her, frowning. he's busy concentrating on trying to figure how to work the ugly, too tall thing when he hears elle incredulously getting onto somebody about something. figures.

"what the hell are you doing?" elle asks, and derek turns to look at her directing the question at spencer. figures.

spenced glances up at her, frowning. "uhm. what do you mean?" which is a fair question, because spencer doesn't look like he's doing anything, except eating walnuts and reading through papers - her papers originally, so she should actually be thanking him, really.

"did you just - you just cracked that walnut."

"...yeah?"

"with your bare hands."

"...yeah?"

derek turns to elle, about to ask if she's feeling okay, when he pauses - wait.

what?

"you did what?" he asks and spencer gives him a funny look, gesturing to the walnut shells in front of him.

"i cracked them. like you're supposed to do. before you, you know, eat them?" he says, speaking like he's explaining something to a five year old, as if derek's the one cracking open fucking walnuts with his bare hands, "now, if you don't mind, i'd like to eat my nuts in peace." he adds, then flushes when he's realized what he's said.

gideon looks up, in what looks like equal parts regret and exasperation as morgan laughs and exchanges looks with elle who's doing her best not to. she's failing.

"can you two take anything seriously?" hotch asks, though amusement laces his tone. derek opens his mouth to retaliate, and probably point out that it still doesn't answer what the hell spencer is doing, when hotch, the hypocritical bastard he is, says, "you know who else is good at nutcracking?"

elle smirks, stealing the opening of the joke for what it is and running with it, "me."

ii. reflexes

elle watches through the window wall as spencer fills his coffee cup, cracking her neck.

"hey," derek says from where he sits at his desk, and she glances over at him. "wanna see something funny?"

her and derek's ideas of funny tend to be on the same page, she's found, so she nods, already grinning. he gestures to spencer, then stands up, slipping between the door and the wall so that when it opens, he's hidden.

"you're a jackass," she says, still grinning, but then stops and shuts up, pretending to go back to work as she sees spencer approaching. she looks up as he gets to the doorway.

"hey, where did morgan -," spencer starts, before morgan cuts him off, shouting something incoherent as he jumps out from behind the opened crack.

elle stifles her laughter, before her jaw drops when a strangled noise comes from derek as spencer decks him in the nose and spills his coffee all over him.

"son of a bitch!" derek yells, though it sounds more like an estranged cat, and spencer yanks his arm back.

"oh, god." he splutters, "i'm so - i didn't know it was you! i'm so sorry, it was just reflexes - are you okay?"

elle isn't sure morgan can hear him as a peal of laughter escapes through her lips, and she cackles, finally recovering. derek glares at her, his hand holding where his nose is freshly bleeding, as spencer sets down his now empty cup and jogs back to the coffee room to grab napkins.

he presses them to derek, though they don't do much between the blood and the steaming coffee. elle wipes her eyes, still chuckling, as the door to hotch's office opens.

they all look over as he walks a step out, stops, assesses the situation, and then turns around and walks back in, closing the door behind him.

iii. taking shots (and other things)

"we can be responsible adults and still take shots." derek argues uselessly, ordering a round of shots, and emily gives him a look.

"morgan, when have you ever been a responsible adult in your life?"

"i can be responsible!" he protests, and jj laughs.

"your search history says otherwise." spencer says, and he whips around to look at him.

"how do you know what's in my search history?" but spencer just grins without revealing anything.

emily leans over and drops her voice, whispering, in russian, "you're gonna slip me the password for that later, right?"

"obviously," he replies back, still in russian, and derek narrows his eyes at them.

"hey, no conversing in languages i don't know, it's not fair."

the bartender comes back over with four shots of - disgustingly - vodka and slides one to each of them. morgan takes one and gestures it with a grin to them.

"besides, i'm paying." he says, lifting the glass to his lips and downing it with a grimace.

"oh, well in that case," emily says, doing the same.

derek turns to spencer expectantly, raising an eyebrow, and it takes him a moment to realize what he wants. when he does, he let's out an awkward chuckle.

"uh, no, i'll pass."

"aw, come on, pretty boy, live a little, let loose. when's the last time you drank? it's not like it'll kill you."

"it might." emily mutters and spencer shoots her a look.

"i'm fine. besides, if i do, who'll be designated driver?"

"i will," jj volunteers, all too readily, "i'm not sure i want to go home to a colicky baby drunk."

"haha," derek says, poking fun at spencer, "now you don't have an excuse."

spencer grimaces, but concedes with a sigh. it was true that he hadn't had alcohol in awhile - while the others got drunk and goofed off, he usually just watched with equal parts mild embarrassment and amusement and took the role of designated driver. after everything with hankle and the dialudid, he just didn't want to risk it.

that didn't stop him from taking the glass and swallowing it down now, though, ignoring the burning that follows.

fuck it, why not.

"wow." emily says as jj laughs, "that was quick." and he shrugs.

derek orders another round and the night bleeds together as hours pass in a blur. morgan keeps ordering and jj laughing and emily keeps up the commentary as spencer keeps up the shots.

for every one derek drinks, spencer follows it with two - one for him, and one ordered for jj that'll end up a waste of money if someone doesn't take it.

"no, seriously," derek is saying, "i didn't know you could drink like that."

spencer shrugs again, then grins, "guess there's a lot you don't know about me."

jj raises her eyebrows, glancing over but not saying anything and emily gives him a once over.

"that," she says, "i can believe."

"really?" derek demands in disbelief.

"yeah," he says, as the bartender slides over four more glasses, "like my tattoos."

"you're what?" he asks and spencer grins, taking another shot.

iv. cherry stem knotting (not in the kinky way)

emily doesn't even like cherries. they're too redish purple and too sweet and - she can almost tolerate the ones that come in the big plastic bags like grapes, the ones with the stems still on them and the pits in the middle, but they're still just gross. and the maraschino cherries are worse - they don't even taste like cherries.

penelope, unsurprisingly, loves them. if emily had a nickel everytime she caught penelope with a bag of cherries, she'd be retired. (well. no, she wouldn't, who is she trying to kid - but that's besides the point.)

the point is, she's got them out now, the ones emily almost-not-really tolerates, and her and luke are having a cherry pit spitting competition. there are cups lined up at the end of his desk, and they're taking turns popping the fruit in their mouths, chewing the red-purple off and then spitting the seeds across the room into the cup.

it's a little disgusting, albeit amusing.

luke spits out another seed and emily watches as he misses ungracefully. penelope cheers, taunting him as he aggressively sticks his tongue out at her.

emily glances up as spencer reaches over and grabs a handful for himself - offering one to emily who politely declines with a wrinkled nose.

"what happens when one of you hits somebody with a pit?" spencer asks, popping a cherry into his mouth - stem and all. emily stares at him, opening her mouth to what the fuck him, but luke and penelope interrupt her.

"we won't," they both say at the same time, then grin at each other, grabbing more cherries.

spencer leads forward and spits his pit and stem out into the cup on luke's desk, and emily raises both her eyebrows at him.

"impressive."

penelope and lule glance over, curiosity lining their faces as they glance at the stem he spit out.

"wow. didn't know you had such... skill." penelope says, as she examines the knotted stem.

emily snorts at what she's implying and luke chuckles, "yeah, really. it's very impressive. bet it comes in handy."

he winks and - honestly, the whole situation is hilariously awkward, if only because they're making it that way.

it takes spencer a little too long to catch onto what they're implying, and when he does, his face flushes so bad, emily considers the possibility of him being a toilet.

"that's not - no, i just -,"

"not in the kinky way?" luke unhelpfully supplies, teasing him, and he glares at him, still red.

"you think you're funnier than you are. i hope you lose."

"no chance," he says, eating another cherry and spitting the reamins into the cup.

emily gives in and leans over, grabbing a cherry and putting in her mouth, grimacing at the taste. she spits out the seed a second later and then knots the stem - softens it, holds it in her teeth, and pushes it through - and repeats.

spencer nods at her and she nods back in a weird, comical sort of solidarity as luke looks back.

"you can both do it?" he asks, "you gotta teach me."

"maybe you don't deserve to know." mutters penelope, and he mocks her. emily shrugs.

"or," she says, popping another one in her mouth and spitting the tied cherry stem out, "it's a gay thing."

spencer snorts.

v. singing

jj wonders when she will stop letting spencer surprise her. she's already figured out that he can do more surprisingly odd things then she would've expected - throughout the years, she's caught on pretty quickly that there's more to him than meets the eye.

still, that doesn't stop her now, as she drops her keys in the bowl next to the door and the bags she has at her feet and calls "i'm here."

after a night out with penelope that was way more emotionally taxing then should be allowed, she ends up home with several bags of candles and toys and books - little things for her, will, henry, and michael.

since will and henry were in new orleans on an expected visit to will's sister, who was in town, spencer had ended up watching michael for a couple of hours while penelope took jj to dinner "as a treat".

she's met with the silence of an empty house and she frowns, locking the front door and shutting the blinds in the living room as she makes her way to the other side of the room to the hall.

she pauses, smiling softly at the constellation orion that has decided to make an appearance tonight - it had been her sister's favorite constellation, back when the only thing that mattered was who got the last of the milk for their cereal.

"hello?" she calls, finally pulling the string and closing the last blind, and walks down the hall to the nursery room - or michael's room, since he's nearly three now, it's hardly a nursery - when there's still no answer.

when she gets the door, she hesitates - there's a soft sound coming from the inside, like someone humming or talking lowly.

she peers through the crack and closes one eye so she can better, and does her best to silence the gasp she feels want to escape at the sight in front of her.

spencer has michael's in his arm, and he's sitting in the rocking chair jj and will had bought years ago. they've had it since henry was a newborn, and the baby blue paint is chipping, and it creaks every so often, but neither of them could bear to part with it. she's glad for the introspective nostalgia now, because as she watches her best friend hold her son, rocking quietly, she feels an indescribably warm feeling spread through her chest.

jj has always appreciated the little moments. every member that has ever been apart of the team has been through too much - both on and off the job - and the last year has been the worst. between mexico and scratch and all the losses they've faced, sometimes it feels like they're team will never quite be whole again.

she hears the humming sound she couldn't identify a few moments ago, and she feels another overwhelming surge of emotion when she realizes spencer is singing. it's soft and so quiet, she almost misses it, but it's there. it's oddly soothing, listening to him, and she finds herself surprised at how nice his voice is.

she stands there for a little while longer, before she decides to go back into the living room. she ends up falling asleep on the couch and - well, if she wakes up in the morning with a picture she'd sent to garcia just before she'd dozed off and a video for what she'll claim is blackmail if found, but is really just to keep for herself from the night before, it's her own business.

[mggssocks]

In the Dark

Credit To Gif Creator.

Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid

Content warnings: only fluff!

Summary: Spencer isn’t only afraid of the dark, he’s also afraid of not being able to keep things in it. But the plan of doing so fails when he accidentally brings up your name in a conversation with the team.

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: Hi! Been really busy but I wanted to get this out here so therefore this one kind of sucks lol. I didn’t do much spell checking so if you see any mistakes pls ignore it. Also I added a quote at the end like how they do in the show. Thank you for taking the time out of your day (or possible sleep schedule lol) to read this and if you like it give it a like, reblog or comment. Enjoys! <3

masterlist

The team laughed on the jet as hotch took the cards from each and every member to shuffle them.

“Look I’m just saying, there’s nothing wrong with being a little afraid of dogs.” Derek says in a defensive tone.

“They’re completely harmless.” JJ laughs.

“Actually,JJ, even though dogs aren’t completely dangerous, people should be aware that dogs of any age, including puppies, can sometimes carry harmful germs that can make people sick.” Spencer says.

JJ rolls her eyes as he continues. Derek zoned out half way through. Gideon zoned out from the beginning, staring at the table. Hotch laughed, amused at everyone’s reaction to their typical genius’ rants. Emily paid attention as she didn’t like to make Spencer feel bad about his rants.

“Don’t even get me started on bites which is estimated that one point five through two percent of the US population, from four point five to four point seven million people, are bitten by dogs yearly. Most bites occur in children.” He finished his sentence with a proud smile.

“See, it just proves my point. What person likes something that could hurt something so precious like a child.” Derek says.

“Penelope would be so disappointed with you, Derek.” Emily laughed.

“So I can’t be afraid of dogs but you guys can let pretty boy here slide while being scared of the dark?” Spencer furrows his eyebrows.

“Reid, you’re afraid of the dark?” Hotch asks, dealing out everyone’s cards.

“I told that to you and JJ in confidence!” Spencer whines.

“Just because you told that to us in confidence, Spence, doesn’t make it any less funny.” She laughs, sipping her bottled water.

“Darkness is a common fear!” Spencer defends himself.

“So are dogs!” Says Derek.

“Yeah but my fear has nothing to do with being attacked or hurt it’s just the inherent-���

“-Absence of light” JJ and Derek say at the same time.

“We get it, Spence.” JJ smiles sarcastically.

“You don’t because you keep making fun of me for it. And Y/N says that nothing is wrong-“

“Who’s Y/N?” Emily asked, picking up her cards. Finally, Gideon looked up.

Spencer’s white skin turned a deep shade of red at the realization that he just outed his relationship.

“Uh- she’s just a uh- a f-friend“

“A friend?” Asked Gideon.

Spencer just nods, afraid that if he speaks again he might let something else slip. He picks up his cards and slowly sinks into his seat.

*******

As they enter the bullpen, Penelope runs out straight to Spencer.

“Boy genius, you have a girlfriend?” She asks, following him back to his desk.

Spencer turns to Derek who has a shameless smirk on his face.

“What’s her name?” She asked while he set his things down.

“Y/N” Spencer mutters under his breath but loud enough for Penelope to hear.

“So you admit she’s your girlfriend?” Emily asks, settling down at her desk too.

Spencer looks up to her briefly before looking back down to his desk, not wanting to answer. As if on cue, his flip phone rings, your name popping up on the screen.

“Oh she’s calling. Answer it!” Penelope pokes both of her index fingers on him over and over excitedly.

Unfortunately for Spencer, his three team members that were around him tuned in.

He sighs and picks it up, answering.

“Hey Y/N.” He answers, turning away from the three.

“Hey! I was calling to see if we were still on for tonight.” You ask as you lean against your kitchen island.

“Yeah, of course. I just have to finish my work and I can meet you there. What time is the reservation?” He looks down to the watch on his wrist. His voice is quieter than when he picked up the phone.

“Are you whispering?” You question.

“What? No!” He whispers then clears his throat. “My voice is kind of messed up from yelling at an unsub.” The call falls silent as you internally question what reason he had to whisper.

“Y/N?” He calls, waiting for your response.

“It’s at 10 but the lady on the phone said if we get there earlier we might be able to get a better table.” You said, not acknowledging the obviously untrue statement.

“Okay, I’ll see you there. Bye. I love you.” He says.

“Bye. I love you more.” You hang up.

Spencer turns back around and sits at his desk, starting his work immediately.

“Everything okay, pretty boy?” Morgan lifted his eyebrows.

“Yeah- no- I’m fine.”  

****

Spencer walked to his car and pulled the keys out when he received a text on his phone. He pulls it out to see you texted him.

I canceled the reservation. He reads. He quickly dials up your number and you answer right away. “Hey.” You greet in a calm tone.

“Hey, what happened? Why’d you cancel the reservation?” He responds before getting in his car.

“We need to talk.” You tell him “I’ll be at your apartment.” You say before hanging up.

“Wha- Y/N?” He looks at his phone seeing that the call ended.

When he opens his apartment door, he’s greeted by you sitting on the couch, holding a pillow against yourself.

“Y/n, what was that call about?” He asks, shutting and locking the door behind him.

“We need to talk.” You look up at him as he sets his things down and sits on the couch across from you. His eyebrows furrowed with concern “Everything okay?” he asks.

“No- yeah everything is fine. For me….” Spencer tilts his head, confused.

“W-what do you mean by that?” He asks.

“Spencer, we’re both young and have our whole lives ahead of us. You have a busy job and so do I. I really want the best of us and I-“

“Are you breaking up with me?” He asks.

“No of course not! I just… I don’t know how to say this so I’ll just show you.” You reach in between you and the pillow and pull out the flat rectangular box. You set it between the two of you and slide it more towards him. His eyes lingers on yours before they move to the box. His hand hovers over the box before he grabs it. He doesn’t waste time opening it and he pauses as soon as he opens it. The white stick with two red lines going down.

“You’re pregnant?” He looks back up at you. You nod, a small smile forming on your face.

He shakes his head, mouth agape. For a second, you’re worried but then he starts to smile.

“I’m going to be a dad?” He looks back at the test. You tackle him with a hug and he wraps his arms around you. Next thing you know, you’re both settled comfortably on the couch. He’s sitting right but relaxed, lost in thought of possible variations of what your baby could look like. Meanwhile your head is in his lap while he strokes your hair, lost in thought of who all you were gonna tell.

“Who are we gonna tell?” You think out loud.

That’s when Spencer realized you’re pregnant and his team hasn’t even met you yet. You already know about Diana but you’ve never actually got to meet her. Spencer has met your parents on the other hand. Your mother who comes from a wealthy family wanted you to date some type of doctor or lawyer or someone with money in general. She was very surprised when you came home with Spencer. It took some time but she slowly warmed up to him. On the other hand, your wealthy father was very accepting of Spencer immediately. He could tell Spencer’s intentions were pure. He loved him off the bat.

“Your parents.” He shrugs.

“My mother won’t be too pleased.” You roll your eyes.

“She’ll have to learn to deal with it. Like she did me.” He laughs. You giggle in response.

“What about your team?” You ask, looking up at him.

He freezes and the realization hits you. “You still haven’t told them about us.” You state.

“No! They know about you.” it technically wasn’t a lie but it’s not like they would’ve known about you had he not slipped up.

You sigh “okay. It would be nice to meet them.” You sit up “I’m going to bed.” You place a kiss on his lips and go to lay down in his bed.

*********

The alarm rings and you reach over a peacefully sleeping Spencer to stop it. You never understood how he slept through that thing. It sounded like someone banging pots and pans.

“Spencer” you shake him awake “your alarm” his eyes slowly flutter open.

“I thought it was a dream.” He groans. You giggle and kiss the tip of his nose “It’s time to get up.”

You slip on the shirt that he had worn yesterday and button up the last few buttons as you watch him get ready for the day. You both talk here and there about your jobs to fill the silence for a while before the conversation dies down again.

“I don’t want to leave you.” Spencer says, standing in the mirror as he ties his Burgundy tie.

“I can drop you off.” You offer.

“That would be great. I’ll put lives at risk if I drive with how tired I am.” He says, putting a sock on one by one.

You stand up and go over to the dresser to put some leggings on “we wouldn’t want that now, would we, Dr.Reid?” You smirk putting the bottoms on.

As you pull into the lot in Spencer’s car, you give him a kiss goodbye and he quickly hops out. You start to head out the parking lot to go lay down in Spencer’s bed on your day off. But then you look over in the passenger seat and see Spencer’s phone that he left. You sigh and make a U turn, going back to park.

“Would you be able to return this cell phone to Dr.Reid? He works on the sixth floor.” You ask the security guard.

“I can’t, ma’am. That is personal property, you would have to return it yourself.” He informs you.

“Oh- how would I do that? I thought I couldn’t go in?” You ask.

“You can sign in as a desk and go in.” He says You quickly thank him and make your way in through the main entrance because in order to use the side door, you have to have a passcode.

Once you sign in and show your ID and things like that, they offer you a sticker and you put your name on it before sticking it on Spencer’s shirt. They let you through and you go straight through to his floor.  You step off the elevator and have know idea where to go, so you look around, maybe hopeful that you’ll just see him.

You see the actual doors to the bullpen and decide to go in there. To be completely honest you looked like a freshman on the first day of high school. You see a blonde woman walking past so you decided to ask her.

“Excuse me.” You call. She turns to you “Have you seen Spencer Reid?” She eyes you suspiciously.

“Yeah you just missed him, he went to the restroom.” She tells you. You nod and look around. “Do you want to wait at his desk?” She offers. You nod and she leads you to the space.

“Hey, JJ, who’s this?” The Black haired girl looks at you.

JJ looks at you, with an idea of who you are but not completely sure so she doesn’t say it.

“Y/N.” You reach your hand out to the woman. Her and JJ turn to each other. She slowly nods her head. “Emily,” she replies. You take a seat at Spencer’s chair.

“Penelope, let it go.” You hear from behind you, causing you to turn. You see the handsome muscular man with another blonde woman. They both stop in their tracks and look at you.

“Wait.. let me guess.. Y/N?” Says the man.

You smile and stand up “You’d be correct. How’d you know?”

“Reid wore that shirt yesterday.. and your name tag. I’m Derek.” He shakes your hand briefly before he points to the shirt you had on and walks around you, you assume to his desk.

“Penelope.” The other woman shakes your hand excitedly.

“Y/N. Nice to meet you.” You smile and sit back down.

“So you’re Spencer’s girlfriend?” She asks.

You nod rather than say anything.

“Y/N?” You turn around and see Spencer walking towards all of you.

“Spencer” you meet him halfway “You left your phone in the car and then I tried to get the security to give it to you but then he said I have to be the one to give it to you-“ you try to explain but he cuts you off.

“It’s okay” he takes it from you and chuckles. You embrace him in a hug just as Gideon and Hotchner come out of their offices.

“I’ll see you later.” You give him a kiss goodbye on his cheek and leave him to work.

“That’s Spencer’s girlfriend,” Hotch says to Gideon. “I see.” He responds.

After you’re out of sight, Spencer turns back around to see his team with sung smirks on their faces.

“What?” His eyebrows furrow.

“I’ll see you later’” Morgan mocks and begins making kissing noises.

“Leave him alone,” Emily smiles.

“She is so adorable.” Penelope grabs Spencer’s hands and brings him his chair. “Tell us everything. Like what she’s like. But outside of what we’ve already seen.”

“well.. she’s sweet, funny, cheerful, supportive, just an all around amazing person. I mean she does have those moments where she’s a little stubborn like the other night I wanted her the last pepperoni pizza but she wanted me to have it so she refused to eat it. But other than that… she’s completely flawless. She’s gonna be a great mother.” He says, lost in thought.

“Mother?” Morgan asks.

Spencer looks over in Morgan's direction and proudly smiles “she’s pregnant.”

Penelope gasps exaggeratedly, “I call fairy godmother.” She says and Morgan’s eyebrows raise.

“How far along is she?” JJ asks.

“Eleven weeks.” He answers.

“Wow! Congrats, Spence!” Emily exclaims.

He turns and sees Gideon and Hotch. “We have a case.” Says Hotch.

The team goes congratulating Spencer one by one as they walk past him.

Hotch and Gideon stay behind them and Spencer goes up to the two.

“Congratulations. You’re gonna do great.” Gideon says before walking off to join the team. “Thanks,” he whispers. He turns to Hotchner who was staring at him.

“You know.. I never expected to be a father. Especially as early as this.” Spencer chuckles.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked.

“I only found out last night. I mean, I’m pretty excited but I don’t know If I’m ready.” Spencer sticks his hands in his pockets

“You’re gonna feel like that up until the birth. But when you hold that baby in your hands, you’ll know.” Hotch explains.

“Did you feel that way with Jack?” Spencer asks.

“Did I.” Hotchner responds, smiling.

Spencer laughs. “Meet us in the round table room.” Hotch says walking away. Before he could get too far, he turned around. “And Reid.” Spencer looks up and turns to him. “Congratulations” is all he says before continuing his path to the conference room.

Spencer smiles.

‘The darkness does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that costs our joy into the shadows.’ - Brene Brown

[0paperairplane0]

Spencer Reid fans either look at Reid and go

😩 🧎‍♀️🥵💦daddy💋 🍆🤰🍑

Or

🥺🌸 🥰 baby✨🧸☺️🧒

And there is no in between.

[spencerspecifics]

Chapter three of my fic!!

Here is chapter one, and here is chapter two :)

TW// conversations pertaining to dead victims/descriptive imagery of stab wounds and death caused by stab wounds, as well as blood is mentioned.

~

Technical Analyst (ch.3)

~

Day two of working with the BAU, and Spencer felt a little bit more prepared than the day before, thank god for that. He didn’t think he could handle another day of getting surprised by how attractive certain agents were, how being in the bullpen made him feel, how out of place he felt.

Now, he could handle himself better. He could buckle down and do his work, and he was glad to. All he had to do was focus on his work, and pray that no cases came flying through to his desk.

~

He entered the building same as always, coffee thermos in one hand, messenger bag slung over his shoulders, and barely waving his I.D. badge at the guards anymore. He has a routine, and as simple as it was, he did enjoy it.

He made his way to the elevators, pressing on the button and stepped back- waiting for it to arrive.

As he waited, a woman with blonde hair made her way to stand next to him. She was waiting for the elevator, too. They made no small talk as they waited, Spencer wasn’t one to initiate it- and the woman seemed distracted with case files in her hand; mumbling to herself about how she was going to ‘have to present this to the team’, as she went through them at lightning speed.

The elevator dinged, arriving to the ground floor to take them up. The woman got on first, then spencer.

The blonde woman reached out, pressing button number six. Same place Spencer needed to go, so he just left it, not bothering to say or do anything as he felt the elevator whirr up. The woman didn’t know that, though. “What floor for you?” She asked him in a polite voice.

“I’m on six as well.” Spencer explained simply, giving her no more information. She nodded, that line seemed to be enough for her. No more words were exchanged as the elevator slid up.

~

Spencer made it to his office with no issues, the woman had gone straight into the bullpen, Spencer guessed she was one of the team members he didn’t get the chance to meet yet. Not a problem for him, he’d probably end up entering her case files into VICAP, too.

Spencer made himself comfortable in the office as he always did, setting his coffee thermos down next to his computer mouse, slinging his messenger bag over the back of his chair, before finally sitting down. Perfect, just how he liked it all to be.

Well, that was how he liked things to be. But he couldn’t stop feeling just the teeniest bit anxious. About what, he wasn’t sure. It must still just be nerves from now doing this temporary stint with the BAU, he decided as his answer, as he logged onto his computer to start today’s work.

~

“Do we have a new intern?” J.J. asked Emily as she passed by her desk to her own, Emily looked up from her computer with a confused expression.

“What?” “A new intern, do we have one?” J.J. repeated herself, sitting down in her desk chair and spinning it to face Emily.

“Uh, no. Why? See a kid somewhere?” Emily asked J.J. curiously. Usually interns were kids anywhere from eighteen to twenty two years old, and Hotch usually made them follow him, or one of the team members for the day as a type of shadowing. The bureau hadn’t done many internships as of lately, though, so Emily had no idea where J.J. would’ve gotten the idea regarding a new intern.

“Yeah, on the elevator up here. Some guy, he looks like a twenty year old. Long hair, sweater vest type of thing. I thought he was going to follow me into the bullpen but I don’t know where he went.” J.J. explained.

“Oh, no. That’s Garcia’s temporary replacement for the week.” Emily explained as she turned back to her work, “Replacement?” J.J. questioned, emily was clicking away with her mouse as she responded; “Garcia’s on vacation for the week. Had to use up those vacation days.”

J.J. just nodded, turning herself back to her own desk to get started on her own work for the day.

~

Morgan made his way into work about an hour after J.J. had arrived, since they weren’t on a case it was more acceptable to show up late. But that being said, when he did finally arrive, Emily gave him hell for it.

“And where were you?” Emily asked him, all her attention focused on him, rather than responding to emails and calls.

“I slept in.” He said simply as he sat down at his desk, ready for the day to officially start now that he was here, he logged onto his computer as J.J. and Emily both started badgering him.

“Did you know we have a replacement for Garcia?” J.J. asked him curiously, and Derek didn’t even get the chance to respond before emily butted in; “Oh, does he?! He was the first to notice!” That didn’t necessarily surprise J.J., as Derek always went to go see and check in on Garcia first thing, that’s just how he was. But what did surprise J.J. was Emily’s enthusiasm.

“What else happened?” J.J. asked, she knew something else was at play.

“Nothing-“ “Derek thinks he’s cute.” Emily cut Morgan off at record speed, he just sighed, not everyone in the goddamn office needed to know he found their new temporary technical analyst attractive.

“You do?” J.J. asked curiously, Derek could tell she wasn’t gonna stop anytime soon- especially with Emily egging her on to ask for information. He was screwed.

~

Thankfully, Hotch walked into the bullpen just in the nick of time, before anything else could transpire between the trio, he walked up to them and turned to J.J.

“You called about a case?” He asked her simply, he looked a bit jostled, like he had woken up to J.J.’s call and immediately come to the office. His hair wasn’t tussled and he didn’t look tired, but he seemed as if he was tired- it was a sense the team gained about Hotch the more they were around him. “A possible one,” J.J. said, holding up a thick case file.

Hotchner just nodded, “Someone get Dave- and our new technical analyst for the week. Meet up at the round table in twenty.” Before heading off, up the stairs to his office.

As soon as Hotch was up and away, J.J. and Emily’s eyes shot back to Derek, he pretended to not feel them as he clicked through his emails.

“I’ll get Rossi, you should set up J.J.” Emily said, “That means you get our analyst out of his office.” She kept her eyes on Derek as she spoke, Morgan just rolled his eyes, looking up at the two expectant women in front of him. “Alright- Prentiss, I get, but I expect better from you J.J.” He half joked with her, J.J. just laughed lightly for a second before responding; “Sue me for being interested.”

~

J.J and Emily both left Derek shortly after that, Emily to get Rossi- and J.J. to set up the round table, for her presentation on whatever sad town needed their help next.

And Derek, he had to go get their new analyst. But he almost didn’t want to, maybe he was stubborn. But he didn’t like Emily or J.J.’s smug faces when Prentiss brought up how Derek noticed Reid first. And he knew things would only escalate once the doctor was actually in the room with them.

Derek had a duty, though. However annoyed he was at the ladies, he went through and got up, out of his desk chair; walking briskly out of the bullpen, out of the glass doors, and down the hall, to the smallest office known to man.

~

Spencer was playing chess on his computer. As much as he hated technology, he did have to admit that he did enjoy the fact he could play chess with someone, regardless of where they were in the world.

Spencer didn’t ever have someone to play against, though. He used to play with Gideon, before he had retired, but now Gideon was gone. And Gideon hated technology just as much as Reid.

His mother used to love playing chess against him, but with her fading mind- they hadn’t played a genuine game of chess in years. But that was okay, Spencer didn’t want to stress her out with playing on a computer, Spencer just wanted to be with his mom.

So Spencer usually played against random users, or the computer itself. It was fun for him, all he needed was a challenge- something this bureau job no longer provided him with.

As Spencer started a new game, pushing his first pawn forward two spaces, a knock sounded out into his quiet office. “Yes?” he asked, turning the game off at lightning speed and spinning around in his desk chair to face the door. He didn’t want it to be Strauss or anyone else- who could walk in and be mad at him for playing chess.

It wasn’t anyone like that, though, as the classically handsome agent from earlier peeked his head into Reid’s office.

“Hey, we got a case.”

~

If Derek focused on Spencer’s micro-facial expressions, he would’ve seen the split second where fear was clearly written all over the young doctors face. But then, Derek would have seen how quickly Spencer’s face went back into a neutral expression. Spencer hid his fear quickly, but inside- he was nervous. He wasn’t supposed to be with the team on a case- he was supposed to do light filing and VICAP work.

~

All Reid did was get up quickly, following after Derek at a lightning pace. Neither of them said anything until they were walking back through the glass bullpen doors;

“Do you- do you know any specifics on the case?” Spencer asked, stumbling over his words and cringing at how they sounded coming out of his mouth. Morgan just shook his head in response, “No, J.J. is going to fill us in at the round table.”

Spencer just nodded, trying to calm himself down by the thought that maybe this case wouldn’t be too serious, something they could work out from here- something that could be wrapped up by the end of the day. But he knew Garcia’s work schedule, he knew the late nights and early mornings she endured. He might meet her same fate on this case, and Spencer didn’t know if he could do that.

Reid followed Derek up the stairs in the bullpen, walking past offices, before reaching the end of the hallway where the round table room was.

~

Derek walked in first, Spencer following a few steps behind him. As they entered, Hotch stood up from his seat at the table to make brief introductions.

“Everyone, this is Doctor Spencer Reid, our technical analyst for the time Garcia is gone.”

Reid stuck his hand up, a singular wave gesture to everyone sat at the table, before saying a quick ‘hello’, and taking the seat nearest to him. Derek ended up sitting to his right, and the agent Spencer had met yesterday- Emily, was to his left. Past her was Hotchner, then the blonde woman from the elevator- the one with the case, and lastly was David Rossi; sat at the far end.

Being in the same room with someone as experienced as Rossi made Spencer nervous, an excited type of nervous. He wished he could go over and ask Rossi all the questions he’d ever thought of, and Spencer knew he had a lot.

Spencer squashed that excited nervous down, though. As the basic nerves of being in the round table, starting work on a case with the BAU, took priority in his brain. Spencer wasn’t sure if he could help this team- he knew he was smart, but what if he wasn’t helpful smart?

~

“This is Andrew Pullin, a twenty nine year old male from Montclair, Virginia,” the woman with blonde hair from the elevator started; pressing a button on the handheld remote to switch photos on the projector to show a classically handsome man’s DMV photo. Caucasian, buzz cut brown hair, green eyes, and a serious look to his entire face.

She pressed the remote again, another photo- this time a lot more grotesque, appeared on screen.

In the photo, Andrew was laid in an alley, hidden away in between a wall and a dumpster, and wrapped with what looked to be an opaque shower curtain. Though the image of what was underneath was obscured, it was easy to guess by the amount of blood around and on the body; that he had been stabbed or cut open in some way.

“He was hidden, but he was wrapped up? This shows some level of remorse.” Rossi spoke aloud, the first of the group to say anything. Spencer wanted to say something so badly. But he kept himself quiet for now.

“He was stabbed approximately thirteen times, across the torso and down to the genitals.” She explained, clicking the remote again to show the photos the medical examiners took. Photos of his stabbed torso, with clothes and without, all the way down to his genitals. It wasn’t a pretty sight, Spencer tried to keep himself neutral.

He had seen terrible things in domestic terrorism, but it was a lot more seeing demented individuals talk about their plans to bomb somewhere in D.C., or how they planned to poison people eating at a restaurant to paint some larger picture. But the domestic terrorism team always got there in advance, to stop it from happening.

These were heinous crimes, already committed and destroying the people they affected most- the victims family and friends.

Spencer focused back to the projector screen now, “Montclair P.D. called us in this time.” The blonde woman said, “This time?” Hotchner asked seriously.

“Six months ago, they had a murder just like this.” She pressed on the remote again. This time, a new DMV photo popped up.

“This is Jakob Dewinsky, thirty two. Also wrapped in an opaque shower curtain, hidden inside an empty dumpster in an alley.” Dewinsky was another young, basic looking, Caucasian male.

“How many stab wounds on him?” Morgan asked curiously. “Nineteen.” She answered, pressing the remote to show the crime scene and medical examiner photos side by side.

Spencer wished he could forget like a normal person sometimes, especially when he had to look at something like this. Thankfully he could distract himself after this, though.

Reid already had a plan on what to do, he was going to search known associates for both victims and cross reference. He also wanted to start on a geographical profile to see how close the dumpsites were, as well as check last known credit and debit card activities to see if he could figure out the victims last moves.

He had it all mapped out, until agent Hotchner turned to him and spoke.

“Doctor Reid, I understand you worked with Agent Gideon before. What do you think of these crime scenes?”

Spencer wasn’t expecting to be spoken to, to be asked about his opinion. So, when he was asked- his mind went blank.

“Oh- um, I think there’s, Uh-“ Reid stopped to clear his throat, to try and salvage whatever this conversation was. “There’s a lot of passion in the crime.. so, I think- um, it could be a known associate of- of one or both of the victims. The number of stab marks is, uh, interesting.”

Agent Hotchner kept his facial expression neutral, like always, he just did a simple nod in response before speaking; “That’s a good start, also look into the shower curtains- see if we can find a paper trail there.”

Spencer felt his face burning up red, the nervousness and embarrassment of being called on was so childish, but what else could he do?

Reid just nodded simply, before turning his attention back to the projector screen, ignoring the stares he felt from the rest of the BAU. Spencer felt like he didn’t belong at the table, not one bit, but he pushed that feeling away.

~

The end of the meeting was quick, only two dead bodies and not enough physical evidence found by the Montclair P.D. meant there was sure to be more work for the team when they did arrive to town.

“Everyone grab your bags, Montclair is four hours by car so we’re taking the jet. P.D. wants us there fast.” Hotch said simply once the meeting had concluded, everyone stood up, as did Spencer.

Spencer knew he was going to be staying behind, Garcia always did, and Spencer wasn’t sure if he really wanted to be whisked away on a jet, working on a team he never could be on.

He would really have to try and erase that memory if he did have it. Which is why he knew it be best he stay behind.

“Doctor Reid, I’m David Rossi. I’ll have to talk to you about Gideon sometime, I’m sure you’ve got lots of stories.” Dave was standing beside him, hand out to shake politely. Spencer couldn’t comprehend what was happening for a second.

“Oh- I’m, sorry, I don’t shake. I’m a bit of a germaphobe. But talking about Gideon would be great! He showed me all these tricks- but you probably know them- I- yes. We should talk sometime about him.” Spencer rambled awkwardly for a minute, wishing a meteor would fly out of balance and strike him down.

Rossi gave him a tight nod in return, putting his hand back down by his side, face unreadable. “I’ve heard a lotta good things about you, kid. Excited to work with you.” Was all Rossi left him with, before he slowly walked himself out of the round table room.

~

Spencer breathed out a sigh after Rossi left, the rest of the team had already dissipated, all off to grab their go-bags and get ready for the jet. The only thing that remained behind was a paper file of the information, the blonde woman, J.J.; as she introduced herself to spencer after the meeting, had handed it off to him. And there it sat, on the table, waiting for him to grab it and dissect it.

Spencer knew it was wishful thinking- he knew some killers didn’t get caught. But maybe catching this one could help him feel better. Maybe that was messed up. Spencer didn’t care. He was going to live in the fantasy where he was on the BAU.

Even if it was just this once, and never again.

———————————————————————

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[sexbirthdeaths]

you keep your socks on in bed (keep the hearth warm)

Their limbs tangle together in a jumbled mess, but it’s the only place Spencer wants to be right now. He feels so tired. He always feels just so tired, weary and worn and heavy, and it’s in Luke’s arms that he feels comfortable enough to sleep.

He hated October.

The winter weather had hit quick and merciless this year, and within a week it’d switched from slightly chilly to freezing. Every window in the apartment had been fogged up when Spencer had woken up in the morning, the stagnant air nipping at his skin. Despite burrowing under his blankets, nothing had seemed to protect him from the relentless cold.

Though the dark had drawn in hours before, it was evening now. Outside his window glowed a dim streetlamp, bathing half of his room in a wash of gold. They live in the city, he reminds himself with a frown, it’s impossible to see the stars here. 

He’s curled up now beside Luke, beneath a soft, thick duvet that smells of too much fabric conditioner. The radiator buzzes in the back of his head, a sound he can never fully tune out.

“You’re wearing my jumper,” Luke notes as he shifts his position, facing Spencer now. His face catches a thin stripe of the light, and Spencer thinks he’s never seen someone prettier. The light mellows out the harshness of his features, washes away the sleepless nights from beneath his eyes, colours his skin healthy.

“Mhm, ‘m cold,” Spencer murmurs softly, drowsiness tugging at his eyes. It’s one of Luke’s favourite jumpers, some cheesy christmas-themed one that he wears year-round, somehow. It’s also way too big for him, almost ridiculously so, swallowing his lithe frame whole, his hands disappearing inside of the sleeves. But it’s so soft, and it smells just like the other man, his signature musky and warm cologne. It feels homely.

Luke laughs, gentle, never mocking or rude. That’s one thing Spencer loves about the other man, love so much - he’s kind, and he gets Spencer.

“Should’a gotten another blanket, worn some socks,” He pretends to be apathetic as he laughs, tugging at the jumper with pinched fingers, as if trying to reclaim it. But when Spencer frowns, he concedes. Luke scoots slightly closer and wraps Spencer up in his arms. Their limbs tangle together in a jumbled mess, but it’s the only place Spencer wants to be right now. He feels so tired. He always feels just so tired, weary and worn and heavy, and it’s in Luke’s arms that he feels comfortable enough to sleep.

“God, you’re freezing,” Luke mumbles into Spencer’s hair. One hand subconsciously moves to start sifting through it, the other pressed flush against his ice-cold skin. 

They’re opposites in that way. Luke is always warm, too warm, shrugging off his jackets in the middle of December because he’s sweating buckets. He takes Spencer’s hands between his, always, holding them tight until his knuckles are flushed pink. It’s the simplest gesture, but the most tender, he never feels quite so loved before as he does then. Their bodies are flush against each others’ now, and Spencer is starting to warm up. He’s drawn to Luke like a cat basking in the sun.

“You’re boiling, and you’re still wearing socks?”

Despite being the type of guy who sleeps in his underwear only, most nights, because otherwise he’ll overheat - Luke wears socks in bed. It’s ridiculous, it really is, how he’s always moaning about it being too hot, but he wears these stupid fuzzy socks to bed. Spencer presses an icy foot against Luke’s warm leg, feeling him flinch beneath the touch. 

“Gotta keep you warm somehow, babe,” Their legs tangle even more.  Both of them are a mess of pointy knees and elbows, poking uncomfortable into each other, but neither of them seem to care.

He’s beginning to doze off now, feeling his words grow more and more slurred as he speaks. It’s moments like this, here, now, in the dim light, that Luke unfolds before him. So much of their time spent together is in a stressful environment, there’s no room to breathe. It’s nice to see him unwound, crude and rougher around the edges.

“You’re whipped,” A large hand rests on the side of Spencer’s face, thumb stroking in soft, rhythmic patterns. The pads of his fingers are calloused slightly, and his hand fits so perfectly with the curve of his jaw. We’re built for each other, he thinks, how their bodies meld together. Luke chuckles lowly. 

“Only for you,” Yeah, Spencer thinks as his eyes begin to close, unable to resist the temptation of sleep. This is where I’m meant to be.