#jean is a very easy character to hate if you know nothing about him. & you know what they say. easy target doesn’t make for a good practice

[cryptiduni]

“white mourning.”

[talaok]

An idea for pedro and reader

They are in a relationship and live together. The reader is also an actress. She asks pedro to practice her lines with her. In the play, she is having a really long line, breaking up with the person ans leaving them... pedro can't continue... at night in bed they are cuddling and pedro talks about how he hated the feeling or the thought of the reader ever leaving

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x reader

a/n: ahh this is amazing how do you come up with stuff like this

"I know that face," he said, busting you immediately as you emerged from the bedroom.

He was sat on the couch, lazily half-reading something on his phone.

"what is it sweetheart?" he asked, as with a soft click, his phone went black

You bit back a smile "How do you know there is something?"

"Because you're very easy to read" he explained "Now tell me what you need"

"Excuse me? I'm not easy to read" you gasped

"No?" he asked rhetorically "Then what's up with the script in your hand?"

You glanced down at the papers between your fingers, feeling a soft veil of defeat land on top of you.

"Fine" you gave up, "Can you help with a scene?"

It wasn't unusual for you to run lines with each other, god only knows how many times he made you go through that scene from The Last of Us...

"of course" he nodded "What's it about?"

"Break up scene," you told him as you joined him on the sofa "I just feel like I'm missing something" 

"What?"

"well I don't know" you laughed "That's why you're here"

"All right," he said, as you handed him the script.

"You just have to read the ones not underlined" you pointed to the paper

"Can do" he smiled, watching as you stood from the couch and ran your hands soothingly down your jeans.

"ok" you breathed closing your eyes for a moment to get in character.

Pedro took it as his cue to start

"baby I love you" he murmured as written.

"And I-" you stopped, your forehead creasing as if your next words physically pained you "I... I don't know if I do anymore" you spoke "I don't think so"

"what are you saying?" Pedro read again, his tone more clipped now, but you were too focused on your performance to notice the way his eyes had changed, had... saddened.

"I'm saying I don't feel that spark anymore, that-that I miss walking faster when I come home because I know that's where you are, that I can't remember the last time my heart swelled like it did on our first date"

Three long beats passed, before Pedro realized that was his cue

Something was happening inside of him.

He knew this all was fake, but a part of him couldn't help but wander on its own... sure it's just a scene now, but it's so real, people fall out of love constantly, and you- well, Pedro realized for an interminable, terrifying moment, that you weren't immune to it, that what was happening to Jeff in this scene could very well happen to him any day now.

He had always known he didn't deserve you, that you were too much, too perfect, too good, too kind to be with him.

And for the first time in a while, a dreaded thought crossed his mind.

What happens when she realizes it?

"Rose" he called, pulling himself out of his own thoughts

"I know" you sniffled, your eyes filled with tears now "I'm sorry jeff-I really am- I don't know what happened, I don't know what's wrong with me, I just know... I just know I don't love you anymore... I can't bring myself to anymore"

And that was it.

Pedro had to glance out the window to take his mind off of whatever was happening.

"It's perfect" he said, after taking a lungful of air "There's nothing missing sweetheart, you nailed it"

"but" you stuttered "the scene is not done baby, there's still-"

"I know" he shook his head, closing the script.

He didn't want that thing in his hands anymore

"But trust me it's perfect, you don't need any more practice"

"a-are you sure?" you asked, wiping away a leftover tear  

"I am" he nodded "don't worry, you were incredible" he forced a smile "as always"

You grinned now "Oh well, if the Emmy nominee says so..." you considered, sitting back next to him "I guess I'm gonna have to believe you"

__ __ __

the rhythmic thumps of his heartbeat were the only sound you could hear from your place on the bed.

You were curled up against him, your head on his chest, and his fingers playing with your hair as his ability to emanate warmth better than any thermostat ever could, proved itself once again even on such a cold winter night.

"You've been quiet today" you finally spoke the thought that had been eating at you for hours.

He really had been.

When he didn't answer, you looked up at him, stopping drawing circles on his belly.

"Is something wrong?" you asked, wishing you could have had a clearer image of his face than the one the soft streetlamp from outside the window granted.

"No sweetheart, nothing's wrong," he said... but there was something in his tone that felt off.

You propped yourself up on your elbows to meet his gaze.

"You know, I'm not the only one who's easy to read..." you murmured gently, as your right hand went to stroke his pecs soothingly "You can tell me whatever it is, you know?"

A beat passed, and then two, as silence spread around the darkness of the room

"I know baby, it's just" he sighed "it's stupid"

"I'm sure it's not" you reassured him "and it's not like I haven't told you my fair share of stupid things" 

He let out a weak chuckle.

"c'mon" you urged sweetly

He looked at you for a moment, before finally making up his mind.

"it's just- " he breathed "the scene you wanted my help with..."

"what about it?" you asked, after he didn't finish the sentence.

"I-It made me think"

Oh shit, your heart faltered, was he about to break up with you?

"That that could happen in real life too, you know?" he swallowed thickly "that one day you could stop loving me"

Oh

"oh"

"and the thought of you leaving... of- of not having you by my side anymore... it just- I wouldn't know how to do it"

"Baby" you whispered, "what are you talking about?" 

"you're too good for me y/n, and I guess I'm just scared that one day you'll realize it and just... leave"

"stop" You placed a hand on his lips to silence his nonsense "Baby, that was just a scene from a play"

"Yeah but stuff like that happens"

"well not to us" you promised "You're stuck with me forever, pretty boy, whether you want it or not"

"but-"

"no" you stopped him "no but. Pedro I love you" you breathed "I love you so much it actually hurts sometimes. So no, I'm not leaving"

You could now hear his heartbeat even if your ear wasn't placed above it anymore.

he looked at you, really looked at you, and slowly you watched the doubts melt from his irids.

"thank you" he said simply, leaning closer to you "and baby…I love you more"

[blackberry-gingham]

For mental health reasons, I'm going back to my roots and doing imagines again, but this time with my new fixation: the xmen (doesn't mean I won't do fics btw, just that it's not my main content anymore).

Here's X-men with a human s/o

Cyclops

Very chill about it, as with most things

He's one of the biggest believers of "humans and mutants are equal", so he really doesn't even think about the difference between you two

Well, ok, he does in times of danger and crisis tho

He's the type to try and explain that he doesn't think you're weak, per say...

It's just that there are some things and people out here that you simply can't defend yourself against

Scott is naturally protective, but he's just a little more alert for trouble when he's with you

Gambit

Actually, sometimes I feel like he doesn't really consciously identify as a "mutant" tbh

By that I mean, he considers himself to be just like anyone else, rather then being a Mutant First(tm), human second type

He's a "Can't we all get along" type, until someone starts causing trouble for mutants

....Which happens rather often, it seems

He doesn't hate humans, but he's a little suspicious at times

He'll flirt with you easy, but when things start getting serious he may start to lay off a little

It's not personal, you just need to earn his trust a little first

Thankfully, he's a good judge of character and will come around in his own time

Jean

You guys get along so well!

Unsurprisingly, Jean has the same mindset as Scott as far as human and mutant relations

It's a little easier for her to blend into human society then it is for Scott however

That, and her lighter personality make it so that you wouldn't even know she's with the X-men at all

She's nothing if not transparent tho, and as long as she trusts you, will be pretty forthcoming about it all

Jean does feel a bit of responsibility in keeping you safe from harm, but she's not as inadvertently condescending about it as Scott can sometimes be

But don't be fooled, just because she's a little more tactful about it doesn't mean she's going to let you anywhere near danger tho

Nightcrawler

Interestingly, Kurt also holds the mutants and humans are equals ideology too, even with all he's been through at the hands of humans

The two are both created equally after all, and the sins of the few do not mean the sins of all as far as he's concerned

He is, however, very aware of his appearance meaning it's quite impossible for him to go the gambit route and act as though he too is "just like everyone else", despite how he feels

He's probably just more surprised that you actually want to be with him then anything specifically about you being a human or something tbh

I could see him trying to use an image inducer around you a lot, at least for the first little while

Don't worry tho, after a while and with some reassurance, he'll get used to going about in his natural form

Kurt's power is extremely passive rather then aggressive, just like his personality, so while I defiantly see him being protective of you...

He's more likely to just teleport you both away and stay out of dodge rather then fight for your honor or anything lol

Rogue

If you think being with Jean is a cool time, just go ahead and crank that up to 11 with Rogue

She honestly doesn't give a shit about whether you're a fellow mutant or not, and once she knows, she doesn't think about it

Well, sometimes in a moment of insecurity she might... But never does she think about you in a bad way

She's probably the most relatable in a sense, because as a mutant who looks fully human, she also wants nothing more then to be human too

Maybe you two can work out a way to get in quick moments of contact without it being to dangerous for you

She'll protest this, of course, but who knows? Maybe it's possible to build a little resistance

Because if such a thing is possible...

Gosh, you better get ready, because she'd never leave your side after all you've done to try and get closer to her

Sabretooth

Ok ok, I know that like basically ever since the 80s or so Sabretooth has been portrayed as little more then a bloodthirsty, human hating, killing machine...

But in his earlier debuts, at least once he's expressed a genuine sense of loneliness and desire to acquire a partner for himself

Sure to get there he basically kidnapped a human woman and held her hostage down in the tunnels where he was living, but you wouldn't be reading this if you didn't want to know how this could possibly work out would you?

I'll also have you know that in that very same comic, he's described by said woman as having been surprisingly nice to her and showing no signs of aggression, so there's that

Personally I kind of... don't like "smart sabretooth", if you will, but in a world where he can speak in complete sentences and use technology without smashing it in a fit of frustrated rage:

He will never let you forget that you are an itty bitty human and will tease you for it a lot

Don't take this as him not caring about you though, he's easily the most protective mf-er on this list and would, quite literally, both kill and die for you

No one gets to touch his frail

Storm

Another one for the humans and mutants are equal lot

She does, however, acknowledge that there are more often then not, notable differences between the two tho

Storm admires human resilience as well as their capacity for good, despite what some of the masses may get up to

As a result, she tends to see that trait in you and appreciates your support for mutant rights and freedoms

She can be a little intense and seem stern at times, but that's really only when she's been on missions

It can be difficult for her to relax because of how her emotions tie into her powers, but she says that simply being able to enjoy your company helps

If you two really get to know each other, you might catch her growing a little more playful with her powers around you

A gust of wind to tussle your hair, a splash of rain to cool you off, stuff like that

Times like these are rare admittedly, but knowing she's this comfortable around you is a reward all in it's own

Toad

Sabretooth is a special case, so he's excluded here, but Toad definably has the hardest time of all the others here getting on with a human s/o

It may have something to do with his feral nature, but while Vic still expresses the desire to "find a mate", be them human or mutant, despite what he too went through at the hands of humans as a kid...

Toad has no such designs, neither to go with his mutation nor to simply help him push past his childhood hatred for humans

Kurt may think he knows how it feels to be mocked, feared, and shunned, but even he eventually found some peace in his little monastery

Mort has had no such luck. Even his fellow mutants belittle him

Any advance from a human, even just friendly ones, will be instantly rejected

...However. He won't go so far as to completely keep distance from you

He may hate humans, but... Well... Maybe there is a little piece of him that's still holding on for acceptance

He's EXTREMELY slow to trust you, but once it's earned, you'll find he's actually very sweet and caring

Unfortunately tho, I don't really see him being able to drop the inferiority complex he's had ingrained into him anytime soon

Wolverine

Are you kidding? This guy has had so many human relationships, it's almost a joke

He never really talks about it, but there have been a few rare times where wolverine, like Rogue, has also expressed a desire to just be human instead of a mutant

Unlike Rogue, he will never discuss this with you however and assuming you don't somehow know he's a mutant before hand, he will most likely do his best to make sure things stay that way

Especially if he reeeeeally likes you

He more so hates what was done to him rather then his actual powers tbh, so while he's not particularly ashamed of being a mutant or anything like that...

He'd just rather you didn't know unless if you have to

Regardless of if you know or not, he's a close second to Sabre for most over protective mf-er on this list lol

In fact, this trait of his is most likely how you end up finding out he's a mutant

Damn it Logan. just can't keep those claws sheathed, huh?

[lavender-lotion]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

How many works do you have on ao3?

868, which is bonkers???

What's your total ao3 word count?

2,445,126 words! I'm aiming for 5mil within the next decade haha

What fandoms do you write for?

CURRENTLY I am (only) writing teen wolf fic! it's so strange to be back where I started, but it's also been really nice coming back to all these familiar characters

Top five fics by kudos:

1. (baby) maybe that matters more - Steter, 40k

2. The Perceptions of You and I - Seter, 5k

3. With You, I Belong - Stalion, 59k

4. Mates and Marriage Proposals - Steter, 15k

5. Breathing You In - Steter, 29k

... should I just call myself a steter writer at this point?

Do you respond to comments?

yes!! all the time. literally nothing brings me as much joy as comments do

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I reaaaaally don't write a lot of angst, but one of the unhappiest fics I've ever written is probably this one?

And Now? - Stetopher, 300 words

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

there actually isn't one fic I would say that fits this? I primarily write schmoop, so a lot of my fic would count as having very happy endings! p

Do you get hate on fics?

oooooooh yeah babes. I've gotten some mean comments lol

Do you write smut?

yes! not a favourite thing of mine, but I do write it here and there. I recently wrote a fic w/ smut that I really really liked it!

keep me warm in the cradle of your skin - Sterekira, 7k

Craziest crossover:

ooooh this is actually SUCH an easy answer for me! it's 100% this one teen wolf/x-men cross over (possibly my only one?) where Logan (wolverine) knew the sheriff from the way when they'd been lovers and he goes to find him, and stiles is a lil jean grey esque character. I think about this thing allllll the time, too. I freaking love it.

what-ifs (don’t fuckin’ matter to no one) - Logan (X-Men)/Sheriff Stilinski, 2k

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I have actually! I only know of one for sure, and it was a stackson fic that someone had reposted to ao3? im so glad I found it (I think someone sent it to me?) and I was able to report it and get it taken down!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! I love it, it's such a crazy labour of love. if you wanna translate my work, just send me a link so I can see it!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

me & @flightinflame co-wrote an almando series where we wrote the same fic from different pov's which was a suuuuuper super fun experience! I've started a few other co-writes, but unfortunately they've never taken off and gone anywhere :(

there's nothing i wouldn't do to make you feel my love - Almando, 27k

All time favourite ship?

nope. nope nope nope I don't knowwwwwww

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh!! this is marked completed on ao3 now because honestly, I'm never going to finish it, but I love love love the premise of this one and I always wished I had finished it

Love Thy Family - Stilinskicest, 12k

What are your writing strengths?

this is soooo tricky lol I hate talking about myself. I would say probably dialogue! I also really like how I write romance, specifically getting together works, and I think I do a good job at nailing down the feelings that go along with them!

What are your writing weaknesses?

settings. actions. plot. I hate plot!

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I used to use a looooot more than I do now, and I would use google translate. it's never GREAT, so I mostly avoid it now. I'll translate like, a single sentence every now and again, but I don't do a lot with it anymore.

as for how I feel about it as a reader - as long as I can figure out what's going on from context clues, I really don't mind it!

First fandom you wrote in?

Percy Jackson & the Olympians!

To Long For Lust - Percico, 3k

Favorite fic you've written?

this is sooooo hard and so unfair and so difficultimpossiblehorrible to answer. if I had to pick one, gun to my head, it would currently be poly fic. it's the longest, plotiest, most developed thing I've ever written, and if nothing else, it's shown me that I can write things I've never imagined being able to write! once im done act 4, I wanna print it out lol

lift our faces, together, towards the glistening - Stisaackson, 159k

@lucky-bishop @mirrorthoughts @thotpuppy @like-lazarus @rosieposiepuddingnpie @kordyceps @whimsicalmeerkat

[hbyrde36]

Self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 🖤

oh! so fun, thanks anon!

In no particular order because they are all precious to me:

Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter

Vampire Eddie Munson, Vampire Hunter Steve Harrington, P.I. Robin Buckley, bad-ass gun toting Nancy Wheeler, VAMPIRE DUSTIN!, Stripper Chrissy Cunningham, and so much more.

My ‘steddie as Anita and Jean-Claude from the Anita Blake novels’ fic. I fucking love this thing. It’s SO FUN. The book series it’s pulled from start out in the 90’s (yes I’m old and I read them when they were originally published🙈) and as much as I love the idea of Vampire Hunter Steve having a beeper, I decided to bring things up to present day (along with quite a few other changes to make it my own, and to fit the steddie vibe). It’s weird and a little challenging writing a fic intermingling two different pieces of media, but I love weaving in and combing elements of each universe's lore, while still maintaining the main beats of the story. If nothing else, read this one for the dream sequences!

2. Caught in the Undertow

Post season 4, Canon Divergent – Eddie lives and Vecna has been defeated.

AKA the sad Eddie fic, or, as i used to call it in my head, 'the passively suicidal Eddie fic'. This was my first foray into the ‘giving my own issues to my blorbos’ thing, although it still seems to be in character for them, I think. Don’t worry, I spread it out between both Eddie and Steve, so they’re both a little fucked up. I loved and hated writing every word of this fic. It was so hard sometimes and I made myself cry more than once, but it was incredibly cathartic. This is the fic I go back to and read parts of more than anything else I’ve written.

3. Times Like These

Time loop, Eddie POV

TLT was my first brain worm, my first ever fanfic, and the first thing I’d written period in a very long time. I had no idea what I was doing, but I was so intrigued by the idea and there weren’t many (any?) Eddie POV time loops on ao3 at that point so it was definitely a little bit of a “fine I’ll do it myself” moment. I was just so curious how it would play out if Eddie, the new guy who knew so little about the upside down, who got thrown into the mix and died all within a single week, were to be the one stuck in a loop. What would he think was happening to him? Would he trust the party enough to tell them? What would he do or change to try and fix things? I think I’ve improved quite a bit as a writer since I finished this, just through sheer practice, but I’m still so very proud of my first baby and think about it often.

4. Life is a Game (and True Love is a Trophy)

Canon was just a crazy homebrew D&D game, sort of.

My second brain worm, this fic lived in my head for 8 months before I had written a single word of it. It all started with the idea that, 'what if all of the events from the show had just been a D&D game played by the boys in Mike’s basement?', and then I ran with it from there. It’s a work in progress and we have still have a ways to go (I’m not sure we’re even at the halfway point yet) but I love how it’s turning out. The response from readers, in comments on ao3 and tumblr, to this one has been very kind and encouraging. It makes it SO easy to work on knowing others love it as much as I do.

5. Thank God we didn’t peak in High School

Friends-with-Benefits to Lovers, Modern Au, life after high school au, no upside down

I wrote this series at the last minute for Steddie Week. Last minute, as in I didn’t even start until several days into the event. I’ve never put out so many words so fast. This fic is loosely based on my own marriage’s origin story, although our beginnings were even more dramatic than this (I felt like I had to tone it down to make it believable). This is the first project that made me realize how fun writing from prompts could be! It’s definitely not my best writing, but the story is fun and cute, a little dramatic and angsty, and as always the boys get their happy ending!

[strangethings-everywhere]

F. W. // Everything & Nothing // Part One

Masterlist Requested: nope Word Count: 990 Warnings: cursing Author’s Note: Hi again! I’m back with a new fanfic. Hope you guys enjoy it!

You’re a production assistant on Voyagers, a new sci-fi thriller. On the first day of rehearsals, you encounter Fionn Whitehead... and immediately hate him.

At first, his presence wasn’t acknowledged. The black-haired actor was a rumor, spoken about in whispers and passing comments. You knew precisely three things about him by the end of your first day:

He was British.

He was very quiet.

His name was Fionn but pronounced like Finn (weird). 

The fact of his softness was of interest, considering the character he was playing. As a new production assistant, you didn’t know much about the film. Voyagers was a space epic, a thriller in which a crew of young adults descends into madness and chaos. Fionn played Zac, the antagonist. 

When he first walked into the rehearsal room, you had to stop yourself from making noises of surprise. You had expected the villain to be less… sweet looking. Fionn was wearing a gray hoodie and a pair of tattered jeans with ratty black Converse. He had a shy grin on his face as he made his way to his seat, giving handshakes and high-fives along the way.

You didn’t have much experience with movie stars. The only jobs you’d had before Voyagers had been small and full of cast and crew members who had no idea what they were doing. This cast was full of professionals like Colin Farrell and Tye Sheridan, whose names you’d known for practically forever. 

Surprisingly, the pros were not the problem.

As a PA, your job was fetching things like water and snacks for the cast while they did their script read-through. You were to stay quiet and out of the way, like ghosts. 

By the first break, you were seething.

Fionn had knocked into you as you passed behind him with a pitcher of water and had not stopped to help you clean it up, not even to apologize. He just kept on reading as if nothing had happened. In fact, no one in the cast had turned to help you.

Armed with fresh clothes and a bitter attitude, you made your way back to the conference room. Most of the cast had wandered off, but Fionn was still seated at the table, looking through his script.

You bit your lip and began to organize the coffee cart in the far corner of the room. It was better to focus on your work, the reason you were there, rather than on the lone actor. As you finished stacking the plastic cups, a hand on your back made you jump. 

“Can you pass me one of those?” 

Fionn stood behind you, his palm resting lightly on your shoulder. You pulled away from him as quickly as you could, keeping your back to him. 

“Miss?”

“Sorry, I’m a bit busy.” You muttered. 

“Okay…” He stood next to you at the cart, close enough for your arms to brush. “Well you’re actually in my way.” 

“And you’re in my space, so could you actually fuck off a few feet?” You snapped, slamming the cups in your hand down on the cart. Fionn took a few steps back with a huff. 

“Fucking hell.” He muttered. “Coffee isn’t worth this.” 

The two of you were silent for the rest of break. In that silence, you took a moment to observe Fionn.

He sat with a strange sort of confidence, an easy smile and a friendly face. He got on very well with his other castmates and you could tell he was good at making friends. It was infuriating, he had been so rude to you and you alone. 

As the rehearsal came to an end, you once again found yourself alone with Fionn. He seemed to move slower than the rest of the cast, taking his time with packing up his belongings and saying goodbye. You moved around the table to clean up, and stopped when you came to him. 

“You’re kind of in my way.” You snapped, reaching past him for his placecard. 

“You don’t have to be a bitch about it.” 

A bitch, is he serious? 

You clenched your jaw and snatched the placecard, letting it whack his neck as you turned away. You stormed out of the room. If the first day was going to be this bad, you dreaded how the rest of shooting was going to go.

You hated Fionn Whitehead. 

***

The rest of the day was blissfully uneventful. Most of your time was spent running errands and to be honest, you didn’t mind. You barely had time to interact with the cast and that was perfectly fine with you. Most of them were fine, but Fionn… you could do without seeing him. 

It was actually incredible to watch them all work. Most of them weren’t like their characters at all and it was strange to watch them switch back and forth. It looked tiring. 

You sat on the sidelines, watching Tye and Fionn argue back and forth. As much as you hated him, Fionn was a great actor. He was charismatic and full of energy, an addictive energy that you couldn’t quite describe. Playing the villain suited him. 

The director, Neil, yelled cut and the two boys made their way over to the monitors. Neil beckoned you over. “Y/N, can you grab these boys some water?” 

“She doesn’t have to, I can grab some.” Tye spoke up before you could answer. He turned to Fionn. “You coming along?”

“Neil asked her to do it mate, why would I go?” He answered, glancing over at you. 

God, I could kill him. 

You did the next best thing: you tripped and spilled both cups of water on Fionn. “Oh my god, I am soooooo sorry!” You feigned panic, doing a little acting of your own. He let out a slew of curses as Tye ran to grab some paper towels. “Clumsy little me.” 

“Whatever.” He snapped. As you walked away, you couldn’t help but grin. That’s what he gets for being an asshole.

[simba-bonfamille-lyons]

soooo -- i was going to post this playlist when i closed simba, and have been sitting on it for like many many months, adding to it slowly and curating it. but, i realized, it actually fits the task. at least, i think so, because this playlist is my little love letter to swynlake. or, simba's swynlake--which has been a character in his story from the very beginning. she has been, at times, a cruel mistress, but also a guiding light for simba, something for him to orient his compass to.

though, it is a character in all our stories. we all very much love this little magical town. so, this is dedicated to everyone and to swynlake, the arguably, most important character in the RP.

see below for analysis on all the songs bc i have meditated deeply on all of them.

Here I Am - Bryan Adams

Here I am, this is me / I come into this world so wild and free / Here I am, so young and strong / Right here in the place where I belong

Felt right to start this with Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, which is a movie all about home. Protecting it, caring for it, etc. It is a meditation on colonization, environmental conservation, nature, exploitation, and rebellion. Which feels very fitting, as those are the stories many of us take on in the undertones of our characters. And something that Swynlake deals with on a semi-regular basis. Especially since this is Swynlake from Simba's perspective, it also speaks to having been born right here in Swynlake, which is not a thing many people can claim. <3

Gold - The Lone Bellow

It's in my blood, it's in the water / It's calling me still / I could leave, I know I oughta / But there's gold in them hills

There is so many songs about small towns: loving small towns, hating small towns, wanting to leave small towns, returning to small towns...I can think of like five right off the top of my head. (Fast Car, anyone?) But I love this song because it talks about the tug-of-war that one feels to their hometown. Which is something Simba feels. He knows he'll always settle in Swynlake, but he wants to have a life outside of it. The line that really sold me on this song is in the title--so it's kind of the whole concept of the song: "there's gold in them hills." Maybe this is just a simple small town to some, but to others, it is so, so special and it calls to you. <3

BIGGER - Beyonce

Forgiveness is key because we're fightin' something way bigger / You'll never lose, we are winners / I'll be the roots, you be the tree / Pass on the fruit that was given to me / Legacy, ah, we're part of something way bigger

It also felt very appropriate to include a song from Beyonce's Lion King concept album. (Which is nothing but straight bangers and you should listen to it.) But, since Simba's story (and the Lion King) is heavily tied up in Swynlake, I thought this would be a good song to include. Since it is all about legacies and being bigger than yourself. Which is something all of our characters are in Swynlake. Everyone is the main character! Swynlake helps them shine. <3

An Act of Kindness - Bastille

Kindness / Is what you showed to me / It holds me 'till I ache / Overflow and start to break / Oh I, got a feeling this will shake me down / Oh, I'm kind of hoping this will turn me round / And now it follows me every day

This is moving in to phase two of the playlist, which is how Swynlake treats its residents. This song, of course, is about all the little acts of kindness that can turn things around for someone. Very Jean Valjean in the beginning of Les Mis vibes. Lots of people come to Swynlake seeking some sort of salvation or shelter and they are met with the (mostly) wonderful citizens of Swynlake who become their friends and family and help them grow. <3

Heaven Go Easy on Me - The Head and the Heart

It's damn good to have met you / I hope that you stay / We're well on our way

I think this one says very similar things to the last song. It is about going through life and the people you meet, and the things that life throws at you. (In this metaphor, Swynlake is heaven, and you are asking her to go easy on you lmao.)

Pay No Rent - Delta Rae

When my time comes, think of the living / Be good to your neighbor, and ask for forgiveness / I won't be there to share in the struggle / Can't get much deeper with axes and shovels / And if I don't see ya, know that I loved ya / I won't pay no rent / For the land that I'm under / I won't feel any pain / I won't know any hunger

This song is one of those ones that I feel deep down in my soul and it just makes me want to WEEP. It is about dying, of course, but also the things you leave behind and how peaceful things are. The first time I heard it, it also reminded me of this Arabic proverb that I love: "Come live in my heart and pay no rent." Which, even though Delta Rae is a Christian band...I wonder if there is a similar saying/they got inspiration from it anyway. IDK -- I just love this idea of Swynlake taking care of you, even after you've passed on...

Watch Over Us - The Lone Bellow

I don't need no crown / I don't need no glory / You've had your life / But that ain't my story / Sometimes I'm up / Sometimes I'm down / Sometimes I'm almost / Leveled to the ground / But my baby's sleeping / Sleeping in peace / So watch over us

...Which leads perfectly into my next song. I have always loved this song because it has a very...ancestor vibe. (Even though The Lone Bellow is also a Christian band. (Listen, sometimes the Christian folk music just be hitting and I like to appropriate it.) It is a little bit of a sadder song (the back half definitely are more sad because I am thinking about Simba leaving this place that he loves so much...)

Take Off Your Shoes - Delta Rae

Did you ever wonder / What's underneath / Ghosts in every floorboard / That'll touch your feet / When we lose the past / The future's nothing new / When you come to my house / Take off your shoes

This song is actually the first one that I put on the playlist, because it just immediately said "Swynlake" to me when it first came out. (Yeah, I originally added it in Dec of 2022, I told you, I've had this playlist for a long ass time. It's been making me weep all this time.) Anyway, I wanted to add a song that was kind of ooky-spooky, because a playlist about Swynlake wouldn't be complete without a little bit of foreboding, because as loving as Swynlake is, we all know she is also a cruel mistress.

Like a River Runs - Bleachers

When I fall asleep I can see your face / What I lost in you I will not replace / And I could run away, I could let them down / But I will remember your light

This is another one of those kind of more ooky-spooky Swynlake songs. Or, at least, that's how it feels to me. I think this song speaks to the amount of tragic backstories ™️that are in Swynlake. Everyone who is haunted ~~ by their pasts but comes to Swynlake to finally outrun those ghosts. <3

Laughter Lines - Bastille

I'll see you in the future when we're older / And we are full of stories to be told. / Cross my heart and hope to die, / I'll see you with your laughter lines.

I think this song is in nice conversation with the last song. It is also the song I thought about deleting several times, because I feel like it is the most "predictable" to be on this list. BUT -- I just couldn't because it feels overdone and predictable for a reason. This song makes me want to stab myself in the heart!!!! This is the beginning of the end "act" of the playlist: which is Simba talking about how Swynlake will always be where he comes back to. He is leaving, yes, but not forever. <3

Home - Dotan

The sound of the wind is whispering in your head / Can you feel it coming back? / Through the warmth, through the cold, keep running till we're there / We're coming home now, we're coming home now

Another song that kind of borders onto "ooky-spooky" vibes. It is almost haunting in its chorus. It is another song, of course, of returning home. Back to the place that you have left but which is still tangled up inside of you and you can't let it go.

Everywhere, Everything - Noah Kahan, Gracie Abrams

Drive slowly, I know every route in this county / Maybe that ain't such a bad thing / I'll tell you where not to speed / It's been a long year and all of our book's pages dog-eared / We write out the ends on our palms, dear / Then forget to read

We didn't know that the sun was collapsing / 'Til the seas rose and the buildings came crashing / We cried, "Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh" /Everywhere, everything / I wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat / 'Til our fingers decompose / Keep my hand in yours

The first time I heard this song, it made me cry. Maybe I was feeling particularly homesick that day but again: this song speaks to that young person in you who has a place that you spent most of your childhood. Where you know all the streets and all the haunts. And now that you're older, you appreciate that place for what it made of you and you want to show it to the people you love. <3

I Will Always Return - Bryan Adams

I've seen every sunset / And with all that I've learned / It's to you I will always, always return...

And I'm a crying disaster. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #140

Would you rather visit The Eiffel Tower or the Egyptian Pyramids? The Pyramids, easy. I would LOVE to visit Egypt.

Would you be surprised if your most recent ex called you tonight? Yes, considering her number is blocked and I also know she has zero desire to talk to me, and it's mutual.

Do you need to lose or gain weight? Lose. Trying so fucking hard and have been for years. It just teeters back and forth.

Do you think you have a disorder but haven't been properly diagnosed yet? Yes, and as of a few days ago I'm on the road towards an autism evaluation and potential diagnosis after suspecting myself of being a high-functioning individual for a VERY long time for a novel's length of reasons. I went to therapy and talked about it, and she will be trying to get me to see someone who can perform an evaluation.

What is the population of the city you live in? I'm not comfortable giving like, a super specific number, but according to Google it's a few thousand over 50k. Apparently it's bigger than I thought it was...

How many pairs of jeans do you own? Literally zero.

When did you last vacuum your room? Nothing less than astonishingly, only a few days ago. The next day I cleaned my ENTIRE room, and I've kinda stayed in this restless state where I'm just tidying things up a lot. Like don't get me wrong, it's fucking fantastic, but this behavior is VERY unlike me; like the immense majority of mentally ill people, I tend to have a shitload of trouble with cleaning, especially without my mother prompting me to.

Have you ever put on or lost a significant amount of weight? Both.

On a scale of 1-5, how often do you curse? Oh, "5" just feels like too small a number to rank how much I fucking curse lmfao

What is the worst thing you’ve ever smelled? My late dog Teddy's diaper if he'd pee in it while he also had this very large tumor that would also be closed within it, plus he regularly got insanely potent UTIs. This was towards the end of his life and he just in general had so much going on. It eventually got to where I physically couldn't be the one to change it if it hadn't been for a little while (ex., overnight), like the smell was one that would basically bring you to your fucking knees, I'm talking dizzyingly disgusting and would make me violently gag and heave. Not even decaying animals I've smelled matched this, and I'm sure being in such close quarters to change his diaper played a big role in just how terrible the experience was.

What’s your favorite social media platform? I think Tumblr's the most fun, but I like Facebook for keeping up with the lives of people I care about.

Name someone with brown eyes. Both my parents, both my immediate sisters... a whole lot of people.

Do you know what your next injection will be? No. There's talk going on about TRYING to get me approved for a very well-received weight loss injection since my pre-diabetes news, but the odds are low because of the kind of insurance I have but also because I'm pre and not actually diabetic. Giving you reliable health care only matters when you're basically dying in this country, y'know?

Does anyone call you darling? If so who? Uh I suppose it's possible Girt does sometimes, but that's definitely not one he says a lot. I'm pretty positive I've seen him write "darlin" in Discord, but I'm not positive if he's vocally used that term with me.

If you had to have a cartoon character tattooed to you what would it be? Um, I guess if I HAD to, I'd probably go with a Pokemon of some sort. Maybe a cutesy Charmander.

You have to dye your hair two colours, what do you choose? IF I knew the colors would take, right now I'd probably go with a pastel pink and light lavender to layer.

If you could would you look at your future self? I think I'd be too scared to.

Who was your first serious relationship? Jason.

If you had to cut a parent out of your life who would you cut out? I really, really, really fucking hate this question, but my dad.

If you had to get a piercing right now what would you get done? Right nostril redone.

Who is the #1 person/thing in your life? My boyfriend.

What are two things you wish you never did? Said certain things to Jason and my dad. Juuuust to name two.

Would you rather have three personal wishes or world peace? World peace, fucking easy.

What were/is your high school colors? Red and white.

When someone sneezes, do you say “Bless you,” or “God Bless you?” "Bless you," but I wish I said neither because of the religious implications. It's just become this social expectation that is completely meaningless, but I'm way too concerned about not looking rude. I've thought of just switching to "Gesundheit," but around here? That'll raise some eyebrows and I don't feel like explaining in the Bible belt of all places "oh I'm just not religious and it feels weird."

Do you ever look at someone cute, and automatically make a move? lol no, even if I was hypothetically single, that is totally not how I work.

What are two things you are excited to do in the near future? Get my tattoo finished, and actually that exact same day I'll be going to Girt's afterwards for the yearly dinner they have to celebrate his late date's birthday; they get together and make his favorite meal. I was there last year and literally cried over panic of being rude lmfao because I physically could not eat it, it was this pasta thing with chicken gizzards and also hearts. I immediately reminded Girt of this and told him I'm going to eat prior, and he said it wouldn't offend anyone but I still worry regardless. Either way I'm still excited to go, I don't see his family enough.

Do you live in a house, apartment, or another type of arrangement? A house.

Are you one of those people who like to spell out numbers? In English grammar (or at least, what I was taught), any number below 10 is technically meant to be spelled out, and depending on the context, I usually abide by that.

Who was the last person (if anyone) you said Happy Birthday to? Either my dad or a Facebook friend. I feel like the latter.

Do you have Photoshop? If so, how often a day do you use it? I do, and it totally depends. I'd say most days I don't use it at all.

Do you watch any shows that you know your parents wouldn’t approve of? lol no, I'm a grown-ass adult.

Leggings with denim shorts; yes or no? I think that mix is perfectly capable of being cute. Probably isn't always, but.

Do you think any bands/artists are trashy? So like here's the crazy thing, I know NO celebrities on a personal level!!! and especially with musicians, there is a tendency to develop stage personas that do not reflect who they factually are!!! but even if I knew any personally, they can do whatever they want w/ their own lives if it's not at the expense of others!!!!! hot take right????????

Do you plan your meals in any way? Not really, like I don't do meal prep or decide at the start of the day what foods I'm eating. I just go with what I want in that moment.

Were you in the scouts when you were young? Girl Scouts? Yes, with my older sister and maybe younger. I can't remember how long, though.

How many people could sleep in your home? (Not counting floor space; beds and couches only) Uh, I'm going to go with needing the ability to lie down versus just sit up, because people COULD do that on the couches... My bed and Mom's can comfortably fit two people each, the leather couch someone could just lay out on and be fine, and then our other one actually has a fold-out bed that could fit two people, but I'm doubtful it'd be comfortable. If we're counting all those, seven.

Have you ever made a hole-in-one at mini-golf? Yeah.

What genre was the last song you listened to? Who provided the vocals? Natively Rammstein is considered Neue Deutsche Härte, but if you want a familiar equivalent, some sort of harder rock for this specific song, I'm so bad with the bajillion different metal and rock subgenres. Their vocalist is Till Lindemann.

If an ex said they hated you, what would you say? Only going with the other two "serious" people I dated, and this is just what I think I'd say right this minute; I obviously wouldn't know until I was right in this situation. With Jason, I'm very confident I'd just say that I know and don't blame him. Sara, I would honestly likely point out that a person like her hating me is probably a good thing.

What would you do if you found out your most recent ex was in a relationship? Wouldn't affect me at all.

If someone liked you, would you want them to tell you? I mean it really wouldn't matter; they can say it, but it wouldn't change the fact I love and am loyal to Girt.

Truthfully, is there someone you used to date that you miss? There are memories with Jason that I miss and I miss how well we once upon a time meshed together; we were best friends that really, really loved each other. At least, for most of the relationship, on his end. He was a super, super silly and boldly him person (he was the complete opposite of me in the sense that he was an open book about who he was, things that made him happy, etc., and that was extremely appealing to me), like it'd be great if we could still be friends in each other's lives, but that's just not how it could ever work, and I know that. I don't want to date him again, there is WAY too much hurt over how he left and how he never communicated his feelings regarding my mental health, but in an ideal world, it'd be nice to still be in touch, but the world is rarely ideal. This way is better for me.

If you could go forward in time and see your life 5 years from now, what would you hope to see? Me being primarily mentally - and physically - well and having learned to love and be kind to myself, supporting myself decently enough with art, Girt and I living together/probably married by that point, lots of healthy and happy pets. Maybe even a hobbyist tarantula breeder for fun, extra income, and the tarantula hobby could use more breeders anyway.

Are you more comfortable with men or women? Women. If you ever meet a SINGLE woman who says she feels safer around men, hit me the fuck up and let me know so my jaw can drop off my face, through the ground, and into the core of the earth.

Who came over last? lol technically Jehovah's Witness. I warned Mom a group of them were wandering around our development (they are so obvious), and so when they rang the bell and then knocked as well, Mom just didn't even answer. They could very likely see me through the window blinds that I have open, but I gave no shits whatsoever. They eventually just left, thank fuck.

Has one of your friends ever tried to "hook you up?" Not exactly "hook up," but Colleen knew I was into Girt (this was obviously the first time, 2017) and she VERY obnoxiously tried to push us together, and I KNOW it made me uncomfortable, and I think Girt as well. There was one time we got together and went to Pizza Hut/Inn (idr) and this completely indecent bitch starts a sentence with (IN A BUSY RESTAURANT) "because I'm trying to get your dick inside her-" and this is THE CLOSEST I have ever gotten to smacking somebody, like I consciously had to stop myself, but the look I gave her should've melted her where her ass sat. She didn't even look at me though, so I know she didn't see it, and I was so pissed off and disgusted by her that I really don't even remember what happened exactly after, but I'm pretty sure Girt just decided to act like she hadn't said that. If you're curious, as a matter of fact no, she is NOT the reason we started dating, he asked me himself without her completely uninvited involvement later. God I am so glad we're not friends anymore, it's hard to even accept I ever was her friend. OH MY GOD WAIT!!!!!!!! She IS the reason Aaron and I got together in middle school, but I'll defend her enough in that back then, I wanted her help kinda getting things across, but we were literal children who didn't even know what "love" really was.

What is your card game of choice? Magic: The Gathering. I'd honestly like to play it again, but I'd need a shitload of refreshers, the amount of rules in this game is MENTAL. Even when I was rather familiar with it because of Jason, there was a lot of shit I still didn't get.

What is your favourite books series? Wings of Fire by Tui T. Sutherland. Finally read a good chunk more of the one I'm on the other day.

If you eat oatmeal, do you add water or milk to it and what’s your favorite flavor? I HAVE to use milk, and I only ever really enjoyed the apple cinnamon flavor.

Was the last video you watched on YouTube a music video and if not, what was it of? I'm watching jacksepticeye's replay of Until Dawn.

Has anyone you know personally ever won the lottery and if so, how much did they win and would you or have you ever played the lottery? No and no.

What was the last thing someone has sincerely thanked you for? I think Girt, for me letting him have "him" time when he wants/needs it. There are times where I'll invite him here and he just wants to be alone (we're both very introverted), and he knows very well he can always just tell me that and it won't bother me at all. The way he reacts to it I feel like he's had bad experiences with this offending former partners or something, meanwhile I'm just like dude if this was problematic to me then I wouldn't deserve him/a partner in general, his life doesn't and shouldn't revolve around me. Obviously it'd be concerning if this was something he did ALL the time since that would just seem like he doesn't want to see me, but that's not the case at all.

What band, celebrity, etc. do you know the most information about and who would you like to learn more about? Oh it's definitely Markiplier, haha. It'd be super cool to know more about the Rammstein boys, specifically the one (the bassist Ollie) that's always been very mysterious and quiet, he's known for how shy he is, however the older I've gotten, the less and less I've felt the "need" to know everything about celebs I love and/or admire, like they're ordinary people that deserve privacy; their lives aren't our business.

[frodokas]

WHY I DISLIKE AOT'S ENDING

Well, the journey has ended - and I've never imagined that it would happen in a disappointing way like this. Before I'd jump into anything THIS ISN'T A HATE POST - I respect Isayama and am really grateful his more than a decade-long hardwork, preciseness. I completely understand that in the end he got tired of it and he absolutely has the right to finish his own story as he pleases - but as auidence we have the right to criticize it in a cultured way. The post is based off the untranslated, korean chapter. Not proof-read.

SPOILERS FOR ATTACK ON TITAN'S 139TH (FINAL) CHAPTER BELOW!!!

The conclusion of Mikasa. Okay, we've had our rounds(bee - boo) why I'm personally not a big fan of her and why she's objectively a badly-written character - but I'd be upset even as a Mikasa fan. I was glad that she seemingly was ready to let Eren go, BUT NO. Mikasa killed Eren, but didn't actually let him go. Seemingly she's gonna grieve over him forever, and this isn't a good message, it isn't a big development from her - I think this is a very bad (main!!!) character writing - many people refer to Mikasa a badass, independent, but she sticks to her deceased loved one in a self-destructive way, even withdrawing from society. I understand that she isn't able to process Eren's death, but I they could've shown it to us in a better way. Mikasa isn't a good role model in general, especially with this conclusion of her story.

I've always been reassuring myself, that Historia will surely have a reason being almost written-out. Well, her pregnancy didn't have importance, the identy of the father neither. Just an easy, plot-saving movement, which is really disappointing, it completely ruins her character.

No titans anymore. A thing I enjoyed about Attack on Titan is that actions, decisions actually had weight - if something happened that couldn't be turned back. I was almost certain that everyone will turned back into human - suprise, suprise I was right. It was just a cheap movement to keep the fans thrilled for a month. My heart cried for Connie and Jean, but this upsets me even more.

Jean really didn't have a vision about Marco? REALLY? When the spirits of all the deceased SC members are there, and Jean, one of the most important characters doesn't have a last-last goodbye with the person WHO WAS THE MAIN MOTIVE FOR HIM? It's okay if you ruin this man's whole character arc, but now totally forgetting about a thing that has determined his personality, development and actions during the WHOLE series? Keep me hung.

Connie, where's your mom? You were fighting for her and would even feed a child if that meant you can bring her back to life. HAHAHA.

I think I won't list all the characters whose development and/or arc were thrown into trash.

Everything is just rushed. I haven't been satisifed with the last eight-ten chapters - they weren't logical, some characters started to act OOC and the story just fell into pieces, being the shadow of itself. The Attack on Titan was a morally grey story about soldier life and centuries of hatred, but it got sugarcoated in the end - former enemies are acting like nothing happened, like none of the killed each other's loved ones or committed mass war-crimes. Yes, I know they've been trough a lot - but suddenly the whole world just forgets all of it? Meh. Completely goes against what AoT was originally about.

Of course, it's not a catastrophe, there were some stuff I enjoyed:

Levi's fate. He's an average character, but at least everything is okay about him - there are no holes. He's fufilled his promise to Erwin and now (as predicted) he is the only remaining veteran SC member of his generation. The last one. Also, his salute was beautiful despite the fact I didn't like the whole "SC ghosts" element in the series.

Gabi-Falco reunion. Anatomy 0%, meme material at max.

Overall the first ~130 chapters. They were truly excellent.

I'm grateful, that this story ever existed, its messages, characters and story is still something outstanding. I feel bad for it, I'm disappointed but that's it. It be like that sometimes.

Hitch is a mood as always. Gotta love this bitch.♡

[miekasa]

speaking of college boys, what do the college au aot babies study??

Okay, okay, I think I’ve talked about this in an ask before but I can’t find it 😭😭 but it’s okay, I love college aus, so I’ll talk about it again! Plus, now I’ve got more thoughts for more characters, so here we go

Levi — neuroscience and psychology of human behavior

He started out on track to do a bachelor of arts in psychology, but when they touched on the anatomy and biological parts of it during his first year lecture, he switched to a bachelor of science.

The focus is still psychology, but through a more clinical lens. Essentially, he gets the best of both worlds this way. He’s intuitive and analytical, so clinical and mental diagnosis is easy to dissect for him. He’s also canonically good at math, so the calculus and stats parts aren’t too bad, either.

This major also leaves him with a few options post-grad, which is a nice bonus for him. He’s likely going to medical school, but that’s not the only route open to him: law school, therapy, lab work, medicine and pharmacy, even teaching are all viable options without going to grad school.

Do not talk to him about Freud unless you wanna get punted off a building.

Be careful with him, because with a single glance he’s already got scarily accurate predictions about your parental and emotional attachment styles, your behavior in social settings, and the onset (or seemingly lack thereof) of your frontal lobe development.

He thinks he’s so smart making comments like, “I see those synaptic connections aren’t working so well for you today,” like mf come here let me lobotomize you and see how well your synaptic connects are working after that🙄

Eren — general health sciences

He’s interested in science and the discovery aspects of it, but picking a specific field of focus right now feels too final. He likes it this way, because his schedule and requirements are less restrictive, and he has more room to find out what really interests him.

He does best when he’s doing something he loves, so picking a major with a bunch of reqs that he couldn’t care less about would have sucked big time for him. It also would have affected his grades. There are still some classes he has to take that he’s not fond of (see: chemistry), but that’s to be expected. Science in general is cool to him and he hopes to make his own discovery some day, even if it’s microscopic.

He also plays a lot of sports, keeping his schedule flexible is important. The sports end up helping him excel academically, which is a nice bonus. Honestly, Eren uses his time at university to learn more about himself than anything, so having control and freedom to do what he likes the majority of the time was important to him. 

He uses his elective credits to take philosophy or history courses of his interest, or maybe even a course that you’re in just to spend time with you. He also uses you as a live model for his homework bye, congrats on being patient number one to him.

Armin — astronomy and physics

He’s still interested in marine biology, but unless he attended a school near a coast, or with a specialized integrated program for that, it’s unlikely he’d major in it during undergrad.

Space and ocean exploration aren’t all that different. Both are vast, largely unexplored domains that reel-in Armin’s interest for discovery. So, while studying astronomy, he still gets to study evolution and make his own predictions about what could be out there because there’s so much to know.

Physics comes with the territory of learning about planetary science, and he’s mathematically inclined, so it works out for him. Learning about the different physical properties of other planets and space masses is honestly pretty sick to him. Because math isn’t a struggle, he actually considered aeronautical engineering, but he didn’t want to be a part of the college to military pipeline; that is, he didn’t want any potential design of his to be weaponized. 

He still gets to study animal biology through his elective courses, and might even find a few focused on marine animals to satiate him. Plant and cell biology are also of interest to him, and are just further applications of his primary study anyway, so he’s got plenty of room to work with.

This boy is interning at NASA and still, with his whole chest out is like, “I don’t need to discover a new planet, you’re my whole world.” Armin, go check on the Mars rover or something please.

Mikasa — anthropology + minor in japanese language studies

Anthropology is virtually interdisciplinary in nature, and Mikasa is a pretty well rounded student, so she’s able to excel in a program like this. She gets to study history, science, cultural studies, and even a bit of art all at once.

She’s still debating between going to law school vs med school, so anthro this is a good in-betweener. She gets a taste of science through her anatomy and kin courses; and lots of practice with reading and dissecting texts through the historical and cultural lectures. So, when the time comes to decide, she’ll have some experience with both.

Don’t know whether it’s confirmed that she’s (part) Japanese or not, but either way I headcanon that she speaks/spoke some second language at home. She wanted to delve more into it, and courses were offered at the university so why not?

Cultural studies courses end up being her favorite. She likes learning about the history of people and their cultures, and it encourages her to learn more about her own family history and culture. It also propels her to apply for a study abroad opportunity, so she spends at least one semester doing an exchange program and absolutely loves it.

She would also encourage you to apply and go, too. You guys might not be in the same program, but if there’s an applicable program in the same country she’s going to, then she’d definitely want you to apply. Spending the semester away with you would be a dream come true.

Hange — bioengineering + minor in political philosophy and law

It’s almost self-sabotage to be in an engineering program and have a minor; the coursework for engineering alone is backbreaking, and bioengineering has the added weight of human intricacies, but of course Hange makes it possible. 

They’re nothing short of a genius, so of course they have time to work a completely unrelated minor into their schedule. It doesn’t surprise anyone that they go on to complete an MD-PhD after undergrad. Insane. 

Bioengineering is essentially the synthesis of chemical engineering and health sciences; Hange spends their time exploring biological sciences and applies the engineering aspects of their coursework to their understanding of (and interest in creating) medicine. Truly a one of a kind mind. 

They also have an interest in philosophy and justice, so when they found out they only needed a measly nine or ten courses to minor in, they went for it, of course. In honesty, they don’t find the studies all that opposing: both law making and medicine making both have some kind of philosophy or method to them in their eyes. 

Hange has... little to no free time pls. They don’t mind it, because they love their coursework, but this means you are essentially ducking into their labs or scrambling to find them in-between their classes during your time in undergrad. They appreciate every second spent with you tho, and will gladly rope you into long discussions about their work. 

Jean — biochemistry + minor in art sustainability

He was undeclared his first year, and took a little bit of everything: art, science, history, anthropology, english. Basically, anything that fit into his schedule. It was hard for him to pick one thing—he liked the science and lab applications of STEM courses, but not the math; and the obvious painting and creativity of art, but hated the pretentious air about art history.

What he wants to do is make a difference, which is how he ends up knowing that he wants to go to med school after, so he picks a science-heavy major, but uses his elective spaces to take art courses. When he mixes the two, he ends up on sustainability—and the complexities about it that are applicable to both science and art are what really reels him in.

Interdisciplinary studies end up being his forte. He can approach sustainability from a science perspective which impacts his art style and materials; and tuning into his creative side allows him to think about science not just from a purely clinical perspective, but from a human one, too—patients are people after all.

He believes that everything is connected somehow, even things as seemingly opposite as art and biochemistry. And he works towards finding the unique intersection where everything overlaps. His studies are pretty cool, and he’s very passionate about them, so ask him about it 😌

The art he makes is pretty sick, too, and often commentary about science; he’s proving they’re not so opposite. You also heavily influence his studies in both areas: caring about you so much inspires him to take the healthcare focus seriously, and your very nature is inspiration to his art. 

Sasha — nursing

She’s friendly and good at working with people, so nursing was an easy choice for her. She accredits most of her motivation to being around her younger family members, and learns that she finds a simple kind of joy in helping to take care of others.

She struggles a bit her first year when it’s mostly all grades and standardized testing, but when she starts getting clinical experience and working in the hospital on campus, things round out for her.

Patient care is her strongest point. A lot of people often forget that knowing everything isn’t everything; if you don’t know how to calm or even just talk to your patient, you’re not that great of a healthcare professional.

Pretty certain that she wants to work with kids in the future, but she’s open to public health and even being a travel nurse if she finds opportunity there!

Of course, she’s pretty doting when it comes to you and all her friends. She might want to go into pediatrics, but the basics of nursing and health care extend to everyone, so you’re guaranteed to be well taken care of with Sasha around. You might even have to switch roles and take care of her sometimes, because her coursework can get pretty out of hand.

Connie — computer engineering with a focus on game design

He might not look it, but Connie has a brain under that shaved head of his. Computer engineering is cool to him because he basically learns about how simple things he uses every day (ie: phone, computer, microwave) works.

Systems and coding are actually the easy part for him, especially when they get into the application of it and aren’t just stuck looking at examples. That’s how he gets into game design.

The part about math and electricity and magnetic fields… well let’s just say he needed to make friends with someone who likes math and hardware his first year to get through it. But the struggle was worth it, because by his junior year he’s found a professor willing to mentor/supervise him as he works on his game and other projects, so life is good.

His school work is definitely hard, which is why the lives by the mantra of “work hard, party harder.” It’s only fair. 

He makes you a little avatar so you can test out his games for him <33 best boyfriend things <33 He’d also… build a game about your relationship. Every level is a different date you guys went on, and he definitely includes something cheesy, like “There are unlimited lives because I love you forever babe <3”

Porco — kinesiology + maybe mechanical engineering

He’s pretty into athletics and working out, but didn’t wanna go down the sports psychology route; he wanted something that left him with a few more options, so he ended up in kinesiology.

He was surprisingly pretty good at biology in high school, so something stem-oriented works out in his favor, and it turns out he’s pretty damn good at anatomy, too. He’ll probably end up in physical therapy after graduation.

He’s also got a knack for cars, which is where the engineering comes in, but he doesn’t care so much for the math part of it (he doesn’t care for it at all actually, fuck that); he just wants the hands on experience of building/fixing things and working with his hands. So, if he can get a minor in it and not struggle through 4 years of math, then he’d do that. If not, he’d take a few workshop-like classes.

Because he wants to go into physical therapy, you are essentially his practice patient. Your back hurts? Not a problem, he’s basically a professional masseuse. Muscle aches? He’s got a remedy and understanding of why it’s happening. Don’t let him catch you hunting over your desk grinding away at your homework, because he will poke your neck and correct your posture (he’ll also massage your shoulders, but after the scolding).

Pieck — classics + minor in philosophy

Ancient studies interest her, but more than that, the language of ancient Greek and Roman culture fascinates her, so classics is the way to go.

Because her focus within Classics ends up being Greek and Latin language studies, she is essentially learning both languages at the same time. She gets farther with Latin that she does with Greek. For whatever reason, the former comes almost naturally to her, so her written and translated work is more complex in Latin.

However, she finds cultural studies relation to Greece more interesting than that of Rome, so it’s a give and take with both; better at languages for Roman studies, better at culture and history for Greek studies.

Her minor is a natural evolution from her primary coursework. Ancient Romans and Greeks set the foundation for a lot of modern day philosophy, so it comes up in her major classes, but she wanted to delve further into the philosophy, and not just look at it historically, so she takes more courses to fulfill the minor.

Can be found laying on a blanket in the quad on a hot day, with her books spread out all around her, highlighter in hand as she works through her reading. You’re always invited to sit with her, and more often than not, it ends up with Pieck’s head in your lap, a book in her hands, and your own schoolwork in yours as you both read in each other’s company.

Bertholdt — computer science and coding

He’s level headed, good at planning, and above all, patient, so he’s cut out for this. He doesn’t consider himself to be particularly creative, which is why he doesn’t pick a speciality with lots of design; but he’s good at streamlining and ideas to life.

The patience really comes in when his code doesn’t run. It’s frustrating to scroll for two hours just to find out that the issue is a missing semi-colon in line 273 that he overlooked, but Berty will sit there until he finds it.

He’s also good at fixing issues. That’s not limited to issues in the code itself; it can mean finding shorter ways to produce the same function or loop, or integrating new aspects into existing code.

Also, he’d just be so cute, coding away on his computer. Just imagine: Berty working on his homework in the library, he’s got his signature crewneck + collared shirt look going for him, his blue-light glasses, a cup of coffee nearly as tall as him sitting at the corner of his desk. Adorable.

He’d make little codes/programs for you, too, even if it’s silly. A simple code that helps you decide what to eat for dinner or where to go on a date, one that shuffles different reminders for you, hell he’ll even forgo the torture of design engineering just to build you a little robot that says “I love you” to you.

Reiner — english + minor in justice & political philosophy

Everyone expects Reiner, star quarterback of the university’s rugby team, to be a business student or communications student; but no, he’s an English major, and he loves it.

Just imagine a guy as huge as Reiner absolutely manhandling someone on the field, just to show up in his lectures with a tiny paperback of The Great Gatsby tucked between his fingers with his reading glasses on. It’s so precious.

He’s always running a bit late to class—either coming from the gym, or practice, or oversleeping from exhaustion—but he’s so sweet to his professors and genuinely interested in the literature that they don’t give him a hard time about it. They can tell that balancing school and sports is difficult, and they just appreciate that he takes his studies seriously.

Yeah he’s in a book club and he dog-ears his books. What about it. They’re doing poetry this month and Reiner actually likes Edgar Allen Poe. Who said jocks can’t be sentimental.

He also reads a lot outside of his classes, and has a soft spot for coming of age stories. He usually empathizes with the main character somehow. His ideal weekend plans after a week of grueling games and essays is taking a long, relaxing shower at your place, while you both share a bottle of wine, and maybe even get you to read a chapter or two of his current book out loud to him.

Annie — clinical psychology/neuroscience

Almost scarily analytical and methodic, so this major was calling her name. Localizing brain legions is… insanely intuitive to her it’s incredible. She’ll be an insanely impressive doctor someday, even if she doesn’t end up working with patients directly. 

She doesn’t care too much for the more philosophical/reading heavy parts of psychology. Even experiments and research closer to the social end of the spectrum aren’t all that interesting to her; but the brain science behind it it.

Nobody should be good at cellular biology. Nobody should be able to ace cell bio and neuro and calc and work towards their thesis proposal in the same semester, but Annie proves it’s possible.

Ends up working in one of her professor’s labs by her junior year. She was offered three TA positions working with first year students, but she swiftly turned them down. Teaching isn’t her thing.

She doesn’t bring up her studies to you unprompted, but if you ask her about them she’ll explain it to you. Her notes are color coded and it’s super neat, and very cute; coloring them is somewhat relaxing for her. She usually saves the coloring part for when you guys study together; there’s extra comfort in doing it with you around.

[sasa-gay-yo]

Phone Call - Levi Ackerman - 200 Follower Special

Levi Ackerman - ModernAU - Light Smut -  “Are you horny right now?”- “This was supposed to be a one-time thing.” - “We’re just friends? I fucked you though.” - MINORS DNI

❀ღ✦❁♡ッ✽❀ꕤღ✦♡❁✽ッ✧❀

In front of everyone. Literally, as you were trying to babysit the college kids from breaking into your liquor cabinet, yelling at your brother who started this whole drunken mess, he grabbed your ass. It wasn’t like he was trying to hide it either, and it made you jump two feet in the air. At first, you thought it was one of Jean’s friends, maybe Eren who you knew had a crush on you, but the raven-haired man never failed to surprise you. I mean, who would have thought you and Levi Ackerman would have sex sober? You two always claimed to be annoyed by the other. Then, last week happened...

Levi was the uptight upperclassman, in your grade, who somehow got involved with the “brats” and could never get away from them. Part of the reason was because Hange, your best friend, and Armin, Jean’s friend, were co-presidents of the Biochemistry Club, and the other part, unknown to you, was that he thought Jean’s sister was incredibly hot. And incredibly beautiful. And Levi wanted you to date him. So much so, he even told Erwin about it. Levi was serious about pursuing something if Erwin knew about it. However, you didn’t know and the fact that he didn’t try to contact you for another round after what you thought was quite a good session, made you think he was over it.

Now, a week later, he’d shown up at your apartment on the tails of Hange and Armin. Jean had asked to host this party at your place, knowing how small his four-bedroom was, and you had no ability to say no to your little brother. Now, again, we come back to the present. Levi groping your bent over ass, something pressing into your thigh, while you were trying to shut your expensive liquor collection from the already drunk crew.

“What are you doing?” You stood up, facing him, and he had that blank look on his face. The first and only time he’d given you emotion was when he was inside of you. In class. Blank. Study session at Erwin and his place. Blank.

“I’m bored of these kids trying to mix the strongest drinks they possibly can using nothing but Coke and everclear. Want to do something?” Your eyes widened at bit, putting your hands on your hips to show some opposition. You weren’t going to let Levi Ackerman think you were that easy.

“Hm, I remember you saying in the morning that this was supposed to be a one-time thing. What changed your mind?” You want to walk away from him, rolling your eyes at how his faced morphed into one of annoyance. The hand he grabbed, he pulled straight down, right to his hard-on threatening the integrity of the jeans he wore.

“Could stop thinking of when I bent you over that cabinet. Thought I’d try to do it again.” You looked down the hallway at the kids who’d gathered to play a round of drunk truth or dare. There was no way you were letting him fuck you in a house full of Jean’s friends. One, you’d be mortified, and two, Jean’s friends would never let you live it down. You had a thesis to prepare and couldn’t deal with that constant headache.

“Maybe next time,” you said, swatting at his lower half to push him back. You tossed him a quick wink over your shoulder before joining the drunk truth or dare, only watching and laughing at the stupid things they made each other do. At one point, Hange had to put her clothes on upside down and Historia had to drunk call her ex-Reiner. Then, Jean noticed you were being excluded from his punishments and couldn’t have that.

“Hey! Truth or dare!” He yelled at you, and now everyone had turned, egging you on to answer. You guessed just one little round wouldn’t hurt.

“Dare.” There were ooh’s and Jean hadn’t expected you to say that, so he looked around the room trying to muster up a good enough dare. He wasn’t going to give his sister a sexual one like the others before it, but Connie had bigger ideas.

“I dare you to call the last person you had sex with and give them a rating! Like an Uber ride!”

“Connie, what the hell man?!” Jean yelled, not wanting to hear that, but the other certainly did. They’d heard things you and Jean have told them, and for the girls in the group, you were the resident sex advice expert, coming to you for any advise or sex item buying. You had no shame in helping them. Therefore, with your wealth of knowledge, they knew you’d have someone to call. However, you weren’t about to do that, when sitting right across from you was the receiver. He was staring right at you too, seeing if you had enough confidence to do it.

“Do I have to do it in front of you all?”

“No, I don’t wanna he-“

“Yes, you do,” Eren cut in, glaring at Jean. You sighed. It wasn’t the fact that you had to do this, in all honesty, it was a boring dare, but it was because Levi was in the room. If his phone rang in his pocket, you would die right there and then. Just a few days ago, you were ranting up and down to them, having your weekly lunch at the undergraduate cafeteria after your TA-ing, about how much you hated Levi. This was also during the time he ghosted you after giving you the best sex ever. You were a bit salty.

“Ugh, it’s not like I can give a good rating to this person.” You saw Levi’s eyes flicker with amusement, and he got up right away to walk down the hallway into the kitchen. That line was to hide your embarrassment, but he seemed to have a different idea.

“I’m not listening to her ass rant about sex again. All goddamn day I hear this shit,” grumbling in character, and you saw him take his phone out of his pocket before turning the corner. Now that you insulted him, he wanted you to call. He wanted to see if you had the guts to say that while he was whispering in your ear. He had big plans.

“Literally, this is boring. Can we just move on?” No one listened to Jean, even if you wanted them too, and Hange was the one who pulled your phone out of your purse and threw it at you… probably because she was the only one who knew. She wanted to see how this all would play out.

“Fine. Fine. It won’t be a long call though.” You scrolled through your contacts, thumb hovering over his name for a few seconds before pressing the call button. Levi was smart, and let it ring until it almost went to voice mail.

“Hello?” You shifted in your seat, hearing his voice on the other line. It was laced with the same poison he used to whisper sweet nothings in your ear last week, making you come so much, you’d lost count. It was all because of a dare too. Last week, you’d personally dared him. He couldn’t make a woman come, not with that attitude. Boy, did he show you the talent he possessed. Thinking about it made you shift in your seat.

“Hey, you got a minute. Just wanted to run somethings down with you.” He hummed, and the pairs of eyes staring at you got more and more intense. It was a good thing they couldn’t hear him, and that he was whispering in the other room.

“So, you remember last week right? After the bar?” He chuckled, and of course, it had to send shivers down your spine. No matter how awkward this was, no matter if your brother and his friends were staring and whispering, you were literally getting dirty talked to over the phone by Levi. This was, perhaps, a dream, but you had to play it cool.

“How could I forget the way you clenched around me? I made you cum twice with my dick, no? Three with just my tongue.” You gripped the phone, feeling your stomach heat up. You felt something else too, but you had to ignore it. You had too. There would be hell to pay if you showed signs of getting aroused in front of everyone, especially Hange who had a shit-eating grin on her face.

“Yeah, I know this is weird… but, uh, it’s a dare. Just play along, yeah? It’ll be over soon.” You heard him shift and started to get curious as to what position he was in, only a wall in between the both of you.

“Are you horny right now? In front of Jean and his friends? How dirty of you. Imagine if they knew you were getting off to just my voice, baby girl. Do you think they’d believe it? That I was the one who had you bent over on that very couch, spread for me?”  You swallowed hard, and that’s when the smart ones in the group knew something was up. You could tell by Armin, Mikasa, and Annie’s faces that they knew. They knew whatever this stranger was saying was affecting you in all the right ways.

But, you continued like he was saying nothing.

“Well, yeah, so I’m rating it. Our experience. I’d say out of five stars, give it a two-point-five, maybe three?” He scoffed into the phone and had to hold himself back from laughing out loud and blowing his cover. He knew better than anyone that that was a lie. Levi’s dick had you crying out in pleasure. Hell, he still had the scratches on his back from you and the imagine of you squirming underneath him permanently engraved in his mind. An image of innate, lustful beauty. If anything, he should receive five-out-of-five-stars.

“You want to lie to me right now? Two-point-five? I should make you choke on my dick for saying that. Come to the kitchen and find out what a two-point-five is. I’ll just leave you on the floor after, my cum on your face, begging for me to fuck you.” The groan came out. You couldn’t hide it. It was the way he was being so vivid. It was the way you were glad you were sitting with your legs underneath you, trying to find some relief from his voice. God, he already had you dripping. You shouldn’t have fucking denied him by the liquor cabinet.

Still, you had to hide that groan.

“No, just stop there. Look. We agreed, just friends yeah. I’d like to keep it that way. If we do things twice, it’ll lead to something else. I mean, if you want I can-“ He cut you off, and you heard him groan to. You heard the shallow breaths he was taking. Was he… was he jacking off in your kitchen?

“We’re just friends? I fucked you though. Besides, I don’t give head to my friends, hm? Are you sure we’re just friends, baby? What did you call me the other night or did you forget because I fucked you dumb?” He moaned in your ear after saying it, adding to the pressure of the situation. You were getting so hot and bothered. The moan was just loud enough for it to have lasting effects in your stomach. He was fucking edging you over the phone, your body radiating with heat. Fuck. At this point, you didn’t care if the others heard, you needed relief. You were quick to give him some subliminal messages, steering him in your direction. You know you’d get shit for it later, but you didn’t care. You needed him to touch you and fast.

“No, no. I never said that. Just stick to what we’re doing, yeah?” You didn’t give him a chance to answer, “Mhm, alright. If you wanna meet up with some friends Monday, sure! Like I said, we’re still friends. Yeah, totally. Your house?” You asked that last question, hoping to God that he would get the hint. You needed him now and he was just a five-minute drive. Damn, maybe you’d just fuck him in the car.

“My house? What if I just fuck you right here in front of all of them? I know Eren would like it. You want Eren to watch me fuck you? Claim you as mine? We all know you caught him jerking off to you. I don’t like to share. Even images in other peoples’ minds. They don’t get to dream of your pussy like I do.”  You took one last shaky breath, seeing now everyone’s faces. They were either confused or getting bored of the conversation. Those confused were starting to pick up on your physical signals. Those bored were Eren and Connie, who were hoping you’d at least give them some explicit details to jack-off to later. Shoot, it was hard to not want to have sex with Jean’s hot older sister. Everyone in the group had a desire to do it at some point, but Levi had secretly gotten to you first.

“Yeah, you can, but I’d prefer my suggestion. Just works better in my timetable.” He chucked, and you heard him set the phone down, a belt buckle clinking in the background.

“How about once in the car and a few times at my place? Let’s try to break last week’s record, yeah? You came five times on Friday. Let’s make it six or seven. I want to see those tears on your cheeks. Meet me at my car?” You smiled and almost shouted out with joy, partly because you’d finally be able to get rid of the ache between your thighs, and two because you needed to keep up the act.

“Sure! I’ll see you then.” Finally, fucking finally, you got to hang up. It was a sigh of relief that followed, and then you turned to everyone.

“Talking to that guy is so boring. One of the wo-“ Your phone rang again, and you answered it without thinking.

“Hell-“

“I forgot to tell you, I don’t have condoms at mine, so were going to have to stop on the way back and buy some.” Levi smirked down at you, phone to his ear. He’d walked back into the living room, and you saw his shirt was untucked. You also saw everyone’s reaction and Hange bursting out in laughter. It only took a few seconds for everyone to realize what was happening, and in the process, Levi hung up, the stupid smirk plastered all over his face. He didn’t care what the brats thought or knew about his sex life, all that matter was the payback and feeling of self-fulfillment with the look he put on your face... and maybe making Eren Jaeger want to be him. Sure, he’d get some shit later form Jean, but nothing he couldn’t handle. The sex was going to be worth it anyways.

“You two had sex! Oh. My. God!”

“No way! You were just complaining about him last week!”

“If he was the last person you had sex with, didn’t you say that that was the best di-“ You shot up, cutting off Historia from indulging the others in front of you. They could talk about it however much they wanted when you left, and you knew you’d grow to regret telling her and Mikasa in detail about Levi and your experience. You left out his name, but at that point you wanted to brag about the best dick you ever received to them. You know, girl talk. Now it was fucking awful they knew.

“Goodbye!” You yelled out, grabbing Levi’s wrist and not caring that you just walked out in house slippers. You were leaving that place as fast as you could. It wasn’t until inside the elevator that you let go of him and could finally breath again. Then you turned to him.

“What the he-!“ He pushed you against the wall, a hand on the small of your back and the other above your head. His lips cut you off, using your open mouth to dive right in. He stole a small grope too, the same place on your ass that he squeezed earlier. Before the elevator hit the parking garage, he finally let you breathe, your lips already red from his attack. He didn’t stop though, continuing to kiss down your jaw, lifting your leg up off the ground just to grind into you slowly. Teasing. 

“Best dick you ever had huh? Is that what Historia was about to say?” You groaned and he just laughed, noticing how red you lit up. You were also trying to move your body to feel his bulge over your own arousal. He was playing with you too much for you liking.

“The best dick I ever had ignored me for a week, too. Almost moved on.” The door dinged, and he pushed off you, leading you with his hand to his car.

“You want me to have sex with you so all of Erwin’s political science nerds can hear? I know Jean’s at your house 24/7 too.” That’s when you remembered that Erwin went home on the weekends to have family dinner with his mother. It was currently Saturday night.

“You just threatened to fuck me in front of all of them, I think you wouldn’t mind Erwin’s political science nerds.” Again, he pushed you up against his car, the chill of the red metal and his closeness, his heat, causing goosebumps to raise on your skin. He just moved his neck sideways, his mouth right on your ear to give you the same effect the phone call did. He brought his hand up too, gently squeezing the sides of your neck. It made you literally moan out loud, echoing through the underground parking garage. He smirked at how he was affecting you.

“You’re mine now. No one gets to see you stripped but me. Is that clear?” You whimpered as his hands began to wander, the heat pooling between your thighs. It took all of you to not jump him right there and then, but at least he had similar ideas.

“Yes, sir.” He chucked, pressing one kiss to the side of your neck. His seal of approval. Permission to finally do what you want. 

“Good. Now take those panties off and get in the back of the car, beautiful. I can’t wait any longer.”

❀ღ✦❁♡ッ✽❀ꕤღ✦♡❁✽ッ✧❀

This request was supposed to have some fluff in it too, but I, uh, well this took me places.

[bluexiao]

Destiny & Fate

➜ Character/s: venti; g!reader

➜ Word Count: 578 words (drabble)

➜ Theme/s: soulmate au. angst. hurt/comfort. mentions of reincarnations. where venti dreads for the day of your death even if he hadn’t seen you yet.

➜ Warning/s: mention of his true name. mentions of death. spoilers for act 3: song of the dragon and freedom.

➜ Note/s: i was actually debating whether i’d give venti the angst ending or the last character but well here we go. and omg i just got jean on my 22th pull on my f2p account i’m so shocked rn. i was planning on just doing solo hutao there since i also got her but woop- my unnecessary luck just said no. anw second to the last entry for the soulmate series! guess who’s the last one hehe.

➜ Part of the Series:

Home - Albedo | Love or Hate? - Childe/Tartaglia | No Love Left - Aether | Your Name - Zhongli |

Destiny and fate are two different things, Barbatos knew that.

Blessed by destiny, cursed by fate—what else was he supposed to do just to not lose you?

He tried. He tried each and every time he hears your voice through the wind, when he feels the tug on his finger, urging him to come close, to come find you once more. A red string of fate connecting you and him, a reminder of what had been, a reflection of what could have been.

Venti never really intended to give his Gnosis, no, he wasn’t that easy to back down. Yet, all of his strength were sucked by the painful memories of the past, and just by your memory, he knew that it was time to fight back.

You were a mere mortal. In all of your lifetimes, you had always been a mortal. And yet, you were stronger than everyone, in terms of your dignity, sense of freedom, and pride. You were a fighter, and you were one of his inspirations.

It didn’t matter that he had to wait for a couple of years before seeing you again, not at first, that is. He didn’t see any wrong with it, but after witnessing your death several times, all with the same age, same day, and same loss of life in your eyes, he knew it had to stop.

It hurts so much.

No matter what, you two always found each other. Both would create happy memories for awhile, but the inevitable will always come.

At your 18th birthday at the 18th hour, Barbatos, a god, dreads that very specific moment. Because it was at this moment that you’d perish and he would have to wait for your other life. He was tired of it.

“Maybe I should go with you, what do you say?”

“What do you mean, Venti? This commission is just simple, I’ll be back before you know it!”

He was always too late, always left hanging surprised despite already knowing what was to happen. He always hoped that something will change, that your love was enough for you to live.

How foolish of him.

“Why do you not want me to go, love? Is there a problem?”

He held on to your waist, refusing to let himself be engulfed in the negativity. He’s with you, what could happen, right?

It was inevitable.

Death by a fight, an illness, an accident, it was inevitable.

Venti gave up his Gnosis not because he couldn’t take it.

He gave it as a rebellion.

Whoever was the god of fate, he was willing to fight them. It was selfish, he knows, but who cares.

He just wants to live with you. Fate and destiny be damned.

A tug on his finger lits his eyes up, a smile forming at his face all of a sudden.

“Hey why are you smiling like that, tone-deaf bard?” Paimon asks him, but his grin merely widens.

“Nothing. Hey, what do you say I tell you of the story?”

“What is it about?”

There was a bittersweet feeling in his chest, but the smile retained on his face, just a little bit different than before.

“It’s about the story of the bard and his fight for his people, and his lover.”

And for some reason, the traveller and Paimon felt the pain in his words as he sang a song about the blessings of destiny and curses of fate.

About the ending? Who knows.

[aminiatureworld]

Irrational

Characters: Ganyu, Jean, Keqing, gn!reader

Word Count: 4,100

Warnings: Alcohol

Premise: Emotions aren’t always rational, a fact easy enough to ignore when one is happy or in love, or in any similar situation. However more negative aspects aren’t always as easy to ignore.

In which the reader’s s/o is jealous.

Author’s Note: This is our welcome for Jean! I have to admit she was really enjoyable to write. Especially in a prompt such as this, my guilty pleasure trope.

Not proofread because I’m tired will do so tomorrow.

Ganyu

Relationships were still something that often eluded Ganyu. Friendships, work dynamics, love, they all spun around in her head, and though she sometimes found her bearings, relationships still felt like walking on a tightrope high above a dark and churning sea.

These thoughts and feelings still lingered in her mind, even now when her relationship with you was rock solid she still worried. Ganyu was a mess of repressed emotions; isolated from most of humanity she still felt the need to be absolutely perfect near you, to never let her emotions get the best of her, to be the best partner one can be.

Which is why she hated those stupid love notes.

They’d started arriving about a year and a half into your relationship. At first you’d thought it was from her, but your look of happiness quickly turned to one of embarrassment and slight discomfort when she revealed she had no idea who was leaving little gifts and notes at your desk. Although you made a point to get rid of them as soon as you’d read the contents of the letter they still kept coming, and every day Ganyu saw one of those pink little envelopes on your desk she grew more and more irritated.

And yet Ganyu still didn’t want to tell you, for she was afraid that you would think she was suspecting you in some ways. You couldn’t control what was going on after all, why should she burden you with her fears, with the emotions that threatened to squeeze all the air out of her lungs and tear her thoughts to shreds. No, she wouldn’t burden you with this, she’d take care of it herself. You wouldn’t want to be bothered with her stupidity anyways, it’d only cause more problems.

“I really don’t understand who’s doing this.” You groaned, entering the office one morning to the sight of a rose on your desk, the telltale envelope attached to the stem with a red ribbon. Walking over to it, dragging your feet in a way that made Ganyu, who had been standing behind you, giggle you tore open the letter in one nonchalant movement.

“What does it say?” Ganyu kept her voice as soft as possible, trying desperately to ignore the emotions that were threatening to cut off her throat. How long was this going to go on?

“Oh listen to this,” you scoffed, turning towards Ganyu, a wry sort of smile plastered across your face, “my dear friend – as if whoever this creep is would ever be a friend of mine. I noticed recently that you’ve become quite close to the secretary of the Liyue Qixing. I would never question your decisions – oh of course not – but I find that work romances never last. Perhaps if we were to meet I could explain to you why, though I’m sure you already know the reasons yourself and would never dream in participating in such a thing. Still, I await you reply. Sincerely, your secret admirer.”

With a flourish you bowed, before promptly chucking the letter in the trash. “Well at least they seem finally to be catching on to the fact I’m disinterested. Honestly though, I don’t know what this person is thinking. I really ought to complain to the department, see if they can’t find out why this is happening.”

“I agree,” Ganyu couldn’t help but let disgust fill her voice, “this is harassment. You really ought to tell someone about it.”

“You’re right,” you nodded, before sighing. “I’d hate to be a pain though…”

“You aren’t!” Ganyu shook her head, indignant at the insinuation. “Protecting yourself isn’t being a pain. This isn’t merely distracting, it’s concerning. You deserve better.”

“Thank you Ganyu.” You smiled; glancing around to make sure no one was there you gave her a soft peck on the cheek. “You’re always looking out for me.”

“Of course I am!” Ganyu replied, her face burning slightly. “I love you.” She added softly.

“I love you too.” You smiled. Sitting down you glanced at the rose as if it were a weapon rather than a flower. “A pity they keep sending flowers, I hate to throw out the poor things.” Hesitating you took it in your hands, smiling sheepishly as you stuffed it into your desk drawer. Ganyu smiled back, attempted to ignore the small twinge of annoyance that rattled in her and whispered that she should burn the reminder of her suffering.

The two of you had worked later than usual that day, and it showed the next morning as you failed to show up at your usual spot. Although Ganyu might’ve normally waited for you, today she glanced around her before quickening her pace as she made her way towards the Qixing headquarters. This was the opportunity she’d been waiting for, and though she felt slightly bad about sneaking around behind your back she was also at her wits’ end, and if she wasn’t going to tell you then she was surely going to figure out once and for all what was going on.

The door had been left open by the last person who entered, and Ganyu wrinkled her nose at the irresponsibility of such a thing before walking inside herself. The office was mostly dark, and the contrast of your light being the only one visible throughout the hallway immediately put her on high alert.

Her suspicions were justified when she walked through the door. A man was standing at the edge of your desk. In one hand was a bouquet of flowers and in the other was an all too familiar note. Although Ganyu might’ve normally been merely frightened and appalled she now found herself more angry than anything else, and her words were spat out with a vehemence she hadn’t entirely known she’d possessed.

“What in Teyvat do you think you’re doing here?” She asked, voice shaking slightly. The man jolted and turned around, relazing when he saw who it was. That was a mistake.

“Ah it’s the secretary,” His smile was mocking and the way he bobbed his head made it clear he thought nothing of the half-adeptus in front of him. “I was wondering who would catch me eventually. Didn’t expect it to be the Tianquan’s personal servant.”

“Answer my question.” Ganyu spoke once more, completely unfazed by the insults of a man who was so utterly loathsome. “What are you doing here.”

“You’re rather dull aren’t you,” the man’s tone was a dismissive as before, “I didn’t realize this needed any explanation. I think it’s very clear that I’m here to deliver something to this office’s owner.”

“Do you even know their name?” If Ganyu hadn’t been so angered perhaps she would’ve found the man’s expression hilarious. He seemed to be completely malfunctioning.

“Of course I know it!” He finally let out. “It’s written on the plaque outside the door if you’ve forgotten. But I doubt you would. You seem awfully close to them recently.”

“That’s none of your concern.”

“Oh but it is.” The man’s smile was utterly enraging. “They’re very important to me after all.”

“They aren’t even aware of your existence.” Ganyu spat. Approaching closer she drew herself up as tall as she could. “They’d never have anything to do with someone as worthless and creepy as you.”

“What exactly am I doing that’s creepy?” The man backed away slightly, slight panic mixing with defensiveness. “I’m only showing them how much I care for them! What’s wrong with that? You’re just jealous aren’t you. You want them for yourself, don’t you. Well you can’t have them, because they’re mine.”

“They don’t belong to anyone.” Ganyu replied, voice made soft and hoarse from the anger burning in her chest and pounding in her ears. “And if you can’t see that then you’re even worse a person than I thought you could be. You may think them something to possess, and you worthy to possess them; but in reality you’re lower than dirt and they owe you nothing, not even the air you breathe. You should leave now. You may have no respect for privacy, or rank, or profession. But the Liyue Qixing are nowhere close to incompetent. And if you value a life not spend in total societal isolation or, Morax forbid, behind bars, I suggest you never return.”

“You really ought to listen to her.” Your voice was music to Ganyu’s ears after what had just passed. Turning her head slightly she saw you leaning against the door, a grim smile painted across your face. “She’s the person in this office least likely to simple chuck you out the window.”

Gulping slightly the man finally moved. Shooting one last glare at both you and Ganyu he scuttled out into the hallway. Only when she heard the front door close did Ganyu breathe a sigh of relief.

“I’m sorry you had to see that.” She said, flushed with embarrassment and the lingering anger she felt. “I shouldn’t’ve threatened them, or lost my temper like that.”

“You were utterly in your right.” You smiled. “In fact you were quite gallant if I do say so myself!”

“I lost control of myself,” Ganyu shook her head, “I wasn’t thinking about doing the right thing, or protecting you. I wasn’t thinking of anything. I was only angry. Angry and… well I don’t know.”

“Jealous?” You suggested. Flushing, Ganyu glanced at the ground.

“Maybe.” She whispered.

The half-adeptus glanced up in surprise as you wrapped you arms around her. After a while she returned the gesture, and for a while there was simply silence as you two basked in each other’s presence.

“You shouldn’t feel bad about being jealous.” You spoke after a while. “Every feels jealous sometimes, it’s completely normal. And in this case it was positively valiant! Even if you weren’t thinking of me, you still stood up for me. And I couldn’t be more grateful.”

“I lost my temper.” Ganyu was stubborn in her conviction that what she’d done was wrong. Lessons that she’d taught herself about displaying her emotions passed through her thoughts. “It’s not good to be jealous. I’ll only end up pushing you away if I keep losing myself to my emotions.”

“Being jealous is only a problem when it spirals out of control,” you replied, “being offended at the way someone speaks about your partner, or disliking the fact your partner is getting sent weird letters every day is something that any normal person would be jealous about. Even if the person turned out to be such a lout like that one.”

“You aren’t angry?” Ganyu ventured, still skeptical. You drew away slightly so she could see your face. You were smiling brightly.

“Not a bit.”

“Good.” Ganyu smiled back.

You nodded your head. Apparently satisfied you moved to grab the stuff you’d left in the doorway. Still somewhat unsure Ganyu walked over to you.

“Um, can I ask something?”

“Sure!” You replied. “Anything.”

“Um… can you get rid of the rose in your desk?”

You paused for a moment before giggling. Walking over to your desk you took out the offending flower, opening the window and throwing it out onto the lawn.

“There we go.” You turned around. “I’m sorry if that was making you uncomfortable. Tell me next time you’re feeling jealous, alright?”

“Okay.” Ganyu whispered.

Relationships were confusing. So many invisible lines that one might trip over. Still Ganyu would gladly learn where the lines were in regards to you. For she loved you. So very much.

Jean

Jean didn’t like work parties at the best of times, but now it was all she could do not to scream as she watched the young knight next to you begin to break into verse, proclaiming to all the – hopefully blacked out – knights around you that he loved only you.

Normally Jean was pretty dismissive of the antics of her coworkers. Being the Acting Grand Master she saw it as her duty never to be too punishing, always aware not only of the power she held in such a position, but also of the respect that she had garnered, that she had worked tirelessly for. The Knights of Favonius, from the highest ranked captain to the lowest foot soldier, was comprised up of well meaning, enthusiastic workers. Despite all their faults she cared deeply about them all, and could often sidesteps their antics as the result of their camaraderie.

This time however felt different. Even if Jean knew full well that the knight probably meant nothing serious by it, knew that he was simply drunk and having a good time, she still couldn’t help the coil of emotions that wound taught into her stomach. Scowling slightly into her drink she cursed herself. Maybe she was the tipsy one, for only a fool would be jealous in a situation like this.

“Feeling already Grand Master?” Kaeya’s voice was as cheerful and as unassuming as usual, not at all revealing the fact that he should’ve been utterly plastered. Now he simply sat down across from his irritated coworker, taking another swig before glancing over towards what was capturing Jean’s attention.

“What do you want Kaeya?” Jean asked, attempting to steer the conversation away from its obvious ending. Kaeya was currently the only member of the knights who knew of the relationship between the two of you, and though he took that honor very seriously he was also quick to tease, something made only worse by his current state.

“Ah I see what’s going on.” Kaeya smirked, refusing to cooperate. “What’s going on here? A lover’s quarrel perhaps. No. Our dear adventurer seems hardly happy with the situation. What could it be then?” He let out a sudden gasp. “Is our dear knight jealous?”

“Neither they nor I are ‘our dear’ anything.” Jean pointed out, rolling her eyes. “And I’m hardly jealous. Only pitying the poor soul for the embarrassment he’s going to feel tomorrow if he or anyone in his regiment remembers this.”

“Ahh, I see.” Kaeya replied, tone of voice making it plenty obvious that he didn’t believe Jean one bit. Shooting him a dirty look Jean sighed, once more raising the beer she was drinking to her lips. She didn’t much like beer really, but it was sort of the signature drink of Mondstadt – unless you were rich enough to afford Dandelion Wine on the regular, which few were – and Jean felt the compulsion to blend in with those around her in taste and in manner. Although in this case it was becoming difficult to do so.

Was she jealous? Although Jean would like to say surely not she wasn’t so naïve or so optimistic. She knew very well that she was jealous, but there really was no reason to be so. It felt somewhat below her, to be so blatantly upset by this pseudo-flirtation. Wasn’t she more aware, more mature than that? The answer became very clear when the knight stopped his verbal rambling and attempted, somewhat unsuccessfully, to grab your hand.

“Sir Heinrich.” Jean’s voice had taken on the authority that she rarely liked to use in casual company. “Might I ask you to control yourself in the presence of our guest.”

Heinrich, apparently not so drunk as to be unable to read the now somewhat tense room, immediately and somewhat dramatically, snapped into attention. “G-Grand Master Jean! Yes, of course! I’m so sorry.” Bowing quickly he promptly burst into tears and, proclaiming that he’d betrayed his Grand Master, was dragged outside by some friends, hopefully to sleep off his inebriation.

The tone of the party quickly returned to its jovial origins, anyone still in attendance at 3:00 was either Jean, you, Kaeya, or too drunk to care about what had just happened. Jean, however, was somewhat surprised, and extremely embarrassed, by her sudden outburst. Sinking down on the stool next to you she put her head in her hands.

“I’m going to have to apologize for that tomorrow.” She sighed. Glancing over towards you she reached out her hand, which you quickly took, palm sliding gently into hers. “I’m sorry about that.”

“Don’t be! I don’t mind a bit of flattery, but that was becoming… a bit much.” You let out a giggle, the glass next to you an indicator that you were probably a bit tipsy yourself. “Besides, you’re very cute when you’re jealous.”

“I’m not jealous!” Jean scoffed, blushing slightly. “You and Kaeya I swear, incorrigible.”

“How am I not surprised he picked up on it too,” you laughed, smiling fondly. “I don’t mind it, at least not in cases like this. By all means, be as jealous as you want.”

“I’m not jealous.” Jean insisted, shaking her head violently.

Laughing you leaned over and gave her a quick kiss on the head, ignoring the scandalized gasps from the remaining crowd.

“Whatever you say, my dear knight in shining armor.”

Jean let out a nervous giggle. What was she going to do with you, now that she loved you so much.

Keqing

Keqing wanted to make it very clear that she never became jealous. Absolutely not, under no circumstances.

She had more respect for herself after all, more respect for you. It was below your relationship to be worried over something such as jealousy, and Keqing for her part resolved never to lower herself to such a level, even if you were somewhat more dismissive of the idea than she was.

“Jealousy is an emotion,” you explained when she asked you why you were so cavalier in regards to the notion, “and since I know both you and I are hardly likely to spin out of control if it were to happen, I don’t really find the idea repulsive.”

“You’re very strange.” Had been all Keqing could respond, not wanting to argue with you about it. It would never happen anyhow. No point in fighting about it.

Now Keqing was somewhat regretting that statement as she watched the woman next to you chatter away while she stood, still as a rock, trying desperately to bite back the retorts that were running through her mind at everything this random lady was telling you.

“It really is such a pleasure to see you again!” You smiled at the woman, some friend of yours and, from what Keqing gathered, a long forgotten one at that. “It’s really been too long.”

“I agree!” The woman replied eagerly, her smile so syrupy that Keqing was surprised it wasn’t melting in the sun. “We really must go out for coffee and catch up.”

“Absolutely!” You nodded, ignoring the stare that Keqing was now focusing on you. “Maybe sometime in the summer?”

“Sounds like a plan! Now excuse me, I have to go.” The woman smiled. Nodding towards Keqing, evidently she wasn’t completely oblivious, she waved before walking away. Waving back you turned around towards your partner, a smile on your face.

“Thanks for stopping for me, I realize that took a little while.”

“It was nothing.” Keqing’s voice was sharp and flat, and she ignored your puzzled look as she turned back towards the Qixing headquarters, determined to forget this entire conversation, and the dark emotions it had managed to dredge up.

The rest of the day was somewhat quiet, though Keqing could tell you wanted to talk about your old friend. She knew that she was being exceedingly rude by ignoring your cues, but she couldn’t help it. The whole situation made her uncomfortable, and she didn’t know how to process that. If she admitted it you’d just chock it up to jealousy and not only would she feel somewhat invalidated, but she’d have to deal with the knowledge that all her boasting had been for nothing. Or, to be more explicit, that she’d been wrong.

“Want to have dinner together?” Keqing glanced at the clock on her desk. The day had long ended, and now it was just the two of you.

“Gladly.” She smiled at you, getting up from her chair. “I’m sorry for making you wait.”

“No worries!” You waved your hand. “I wanted to spend some time with you anyways.” Unlike you did earlier today? Keqing bit the retort back. It would be cruel to say that, and somewhat revealing. Besides she really did want to walk home with you, and wouldn’t taint the experience with her own emotional turmoil.

The walk was a lovely one, for the day had been somewhat hot and now a cool breeze brought in by the sea blew lazily. You were discussing one of the transactions you’d had to check, when Keqing spied your friend up ahead. Before she could change your course the lady noticed the two of you however. Calling your name she waved her hand wildly. Distracted from your conversation you waved back, running up ahead and leaving Keqing behind in the dust.

“Fancy meeting you here again!” You exclaimed. “I was just walking home from work.”

“I was stopping by one of the stalls.” Your friend gestured towards the temporary structure behind her. “I forgot to buy groceries, so I suppose it’s grilled Tiger Fish tonight.”

“It happens to the best of us.” You laughed. Keqing couldn’t stand the atmosphere anymore. The conversation was insipid, the participant who’d brought it up even more so. Unable to stop her frustration Keqing walked, or rather stomped, over towards you. Huffing slightly she grabbed your hand. Turning around your face betrayed surprise, but it was quickly replaced once more with a smile. “Ah, I almost forgot. Lily, this is Keqing!”

“Oh, a pleasure to meet you!” The woman, Lily apparently, smiled. “Are you coworkers?” Keqing felt a flicker of resentment at not being directly addressed. Surely she didn’t need a translator.

“My partner.” You corrected, smiling and squeezing Keqing’s hand, something which did little to relieve the tension she felt.

“I see.” Your friend smiled her saccharine smile. “Nice to meet you Keqing.”

“Pleasure.” Keqing replied, not bothering to keep the irritation out of her voice, after all wasn’t she known for being blunt? “Now we really ought to get going, if we aren’t going to be eating in the middle of the night.”

“Sorry for dashing on you,” you apologized, something which Keqing deemed completely unnecessary. “See you around.”

“See you around!” Lily replied. As she turned back to the stall Keqing started moving again, half dragging you through the streets and to her apartment.

Finally arriving home Keqing breathed a sigh of relief. This, however, was quite short lived.

“What was that all about?” There was amusement in your voice, and though Keqing was glad you didn’t seem irritated with her, she certainly wasn’t happy about the mischief in your smile.

“It was getting late.” She replied curtly. “I’d rather not be cooking dinner in the dark.”

“Are you sure that’s it?” Your voice was slightly sing-song and Keqing rolled her eyes, knowing immediately where this was going.

“Of course, what other reason could there possibly be?”

“I don’t know, maybe you were a little jealous?” You shrugged your shoulders dramatically. Keqing tensed for a moment, before shaking her head.

“Why in Teyvat would I be jealous? After all, they’re just a friend.” Although she hadn’t meant to emphasize that last bit Keqing couldn’t help but feel somewhat irritated. It was just a friend, she was sure of that, sure of you. And yet it had irritated her. It had irritated her intensely. And what was that but jealousy?

“Of course they are.” You smiled gently. “They’re just a friend and you’re just the person I love. But Keqing?”

“Yes?” Keqing found her voice somewhat unsure.

“I don’t mind if you’re a little jealous. As long as you never doubt my affections for you, then it’s okay to be a little selfish. Okay?”

There was a pause, before Keqing walked over to you, wrapping you into a tight hug and burying her face in your neck. Drawing back slightly she pressed a soft and somewhat impatient kiss to your lips.

“Are you sure?” She asked, pulling away once more.

“Very sure.” You replied, before leaning in to kiss her in turn.

Keqing was glad to be carried away by the content feeling of being in the embrace of one’s love. She found today incredibly embarrassing and just wanted to forget the whole matter. And she knew you’d let that happen, for even if Keqing felt irritated, even if she resented your friend for accosting you and not leaving you alone she still trusted you more than anything.

And that was what counted.

[ilikemesometaetaes]

Forbearance

Kim Seokjin Oneshot

•••> Author: @ilikemesometaetaes​

•••> Summary: Give him a break, okay? Finding out his girlfriend’s bias wasn’t him is a pretty hard hit to the man’s ego. He has a right to be a little... possessive.

•••> Pairing(s): Seokjin/Reader

•••> Requested by Anon: “Hey love, I was wondering if I could request a oneshot where the reader is dating Seokjin, but he accidentally finds her old fangirl stuff and discovers he wasnt her bias and jhope was? And ya know he gets all jealous and possessive;) btw I love youu”

•••> Word Count: 4.41k [Unedited]

•••> Rating: 18+

•••> Tags: smut | Established Relationship | Seokjin!au | Boyfriend!Seokjin | Jealous!Jin | strangers to friends to lovers | fishing buddies

•••> Warnings: smut, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), forced orgasms, oversensitivity, dirty talk, our jin is a jealous boy, possessive!jin, idol!jin, cursing, alcohol use

Copyright © 2021 ilikemesometaetaes. All Rights Reserved.

Thank you for the request, anon! I thought it was just going to be a drabble, but I guess not! I hope you enjoy :)

~#~

Seokjin called for you from your old bedroom, feeling insecure about going through the things in your closet.

“It’s okay, babe! It should be in there somewhere!” You yelled back, obviously busying yourself with tonight’s dinner before you moved your stuff into your boyfriend’s home.

Seokjin’s lips spread into a tight line, clearly uncomfortable with the action of prying into your life before you met him. He was never one to judge character nor the one to actively seek out every detail about you. He respected your privacy and your boundaries enough to never ask, waiting until you were the one speaking about it.

It was what sparked the relationship between you two in the first place. A respect for privacy and the skill of having patience.

You had met him at a fishing beach; the sun was almost fully set and it seemed that Kim Seokjin needed some time away from the boys and the spotlight.

You were sitting in a camping chair, waiting for the telltale signs of a fish nipping at your line when you noticed the man walking over to the next open slot of shore rocks just five yards to your right.

Conversation was minimal, but being in a setting where patience was what kept a person sane meant that you were fully capable of waiting.

It was strange how you hadn’t noticed it was him. Of course, he wore a mask and sunglasses along with a baseball cap, but Kim Seokjin’s personality was seemingly unique and quite noticeable. The man who sat next to you was someone completely different.

He was quiet, patient, reserved, and outright plain. After a short conversation with him about how the fish were biting that day, you understood that the man went there for quiet- same as you. So you gave it to him.

You just couldn’t help but notice that he continued to sit next to you for the days to come. He would come out every other day or so and sit next to you, regardless of the amount of spots available around. You would talk about the weather affecting the fish, ponder over the current position of the moon to judge the tide, and then resume the silence. It was almost as if you were basking in each other’s quiet presence.

His voice, a familiar tone of inflection, was evasive. It seemed as if he was purposely lowering his voice to distort it, but you could never bring yourself to ask why. Instead, you settled on listening to him speak as his beautiful brown eyes cast a wistful gaze into the bay.

From what you could see, he was handsome. You could see his eyes when he took off his sunglasses at night and the occasional tuft of hair that stuck out from under his ball cap. His shoulders were incredibly broad, stretching every jacket and sweatshirt he wore almost to the extreme.

He sat in his chair like he had run a marathon, slouching so far that his long legs were almost entirely off of the seat. It looked as if the man was dreadfully exhausted.

Light conversation seemed to pick him up from his slump but you didn’t want to press too far, knowing that the man was undoubtedly hiding his identity. You were okay with this, practicing the patience you had learned from fishing throughout your everyday life.

Each time you spoke, the conversation slowly got further and further. The day that you got to talking about what he did for the day, you learned that he lived an active and busy lifestyle. He came to fish for the calm and relaxation- a break away from it.

After a little over a month of meeting with the man to enjoy the silence, he disappeared.

You never got a name; never got an age; you knew next to nothing about him.

You continued to show up in your usual spot, hating when someone else sat where he would, but you couldn’t be rude and tell them to move.

You weren’t going to stop your hobby of fishing just because he did, but it seemed as though your reason for going to fish had shifted. You had gone expecting to see him walk up with his tackle box and fishing rod at his usual time. You only found yourself disappointed when he didn’t.

Several months passed with no sign of your mystery man. Eventually, you had forgotten about him, his presence a mere, fleeting thought whenever you looked at his old spot.

The day he returned, he was almost unrecognizable under the light of the moon.

The cool spring weather had morphed into hot summer evenings and transitioned to chilly, late-summer-early-fall nights while he was absent. Instead of the basic black street clothes of the usual fashion that the young men of Korea wore, he was dressed professionally and warm.

A long, beige peacoat hung from his shoulders in a way that the width of the shoulder seams did not stretch and, instead, looked perfectly fitted as the length fell to his knees. He wore a black turtleneck that was tucked into black skinny jeans, secured into place by a brown belt with a pair of brown leather dress shoes to match.

He didn’t even wear a hat, revealing his light brown hair. All that remained of his old style was the black mask that he wore to cover his face.

The man held no tackle box in his hand; a cooler hung from his fingers and a camping chair was nudged under his arm. In the place of his fishing rod in the other hand was a small bouquet of flowers.

“Oh, thank god.” He breathed. “You’re still here.”

“Of course I’m still here.” You chuckled. “I’ve been coming here for years.”

He sat as you spoke, repeating the same actions with his chair as you had pictured him doing countless times in the past months. Your fishing buddy was finally back and looking as handsome as ever.

“Have you?” He huffed as he sat back in his chair. “I only just found out about this place back in April. It’s quite nice.”

“Yes, it is.” You agreed, turning your gaze to watch the lights from the nearby city reflect off the surface of the water. He wasn’t changing his voice anymore and you couldn’t help but recognize it immediately.

For a moment, you processed his presence- he was actually here. Then, you turned to him again with your eyes trained on the cluster of yellow flowers sat atop his small cooler, attempting to keep your cool.

“What’s the occasion?”

“A celebration of friendship.” He laughed to himself as he grabbed the bouquet and raised it to you, avoiding your gaze.

“A friendship?” You asked, taking them from his grasp and looking down at them. “These are very pretty. Thank you.”

“I figured it’s been a while since we met and you seem to be incredibly kind, so why not be friends?”

“I don’t mean to be rude- I’m totally cool with being friends with you- but I don’t even know your name.” You laughed, hoping that this would finally be the day he revealed himself.

“I’ll only tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“Easy.” You laughed. “My name is Y/N.”

“Please don’t... freak out or anything...” He muttered, raising his hand to take his mask off his face. Your heart beat wildly in anticipation.

As soon as he peeled the loop from his ear, your mouth slightly fell open on its own accord and you were suddenly starstruck by the fact that Kim Seokjin sat next to you.

“My name is Seokjin.” He kept his gaze lowered as if he was ashamed of his identity.

“I’m a huge fan.” You were speaking impulsively, unable to think about your words with the beautiful man so close to you. What else could you say?

“Oh, are you?” He asked, slowly lifting his gaze to meet your own.

“I am. It is very nice to meet you, Seokjin.” You were keeping yourself under control and you had no idea how, practically vibrating in your chair.

“And it’s nice to meet you too, Y/N.” Reaching into his cooler, he plucked out a bottle of soju and two shot glasses. “Care to share a drink over our newfound friendship?”

Grateful for the distraction, you took one of the glasses. “I’d love to.”

Your friendship with the idol bloomed. Under the strict condition that you never told anyone of your meeting spot- not that you wanted to or anything- you and Seokjin would continue to meet up on occasion and fish, sharing a drink or two and learning about each other.

When he found out about your love for his own band, he laughed and teased you for being a fangirl. When he continued to show up after the revelation, it exhumed ultimate trust that you couldn’t resist returning.

The other strict condition of your friendship was that you couldn’t meet anywhere but the beach. Six months of seeing the man you were gradually falling for in one spot became exhausting, but you couldn’t complain. Sure, you couldn’t go out for coffee or see a movie because of the fact that there were eyes everywhere, but you were okay with having your own little secluded paradise away from society.

It seemed that patience wasn’t one of Seokjin’s better traits, because even he came to complain about hanging out with you anywhere away from the brackish water.

One signed confidentiality agreement and an established set of rules later and he was being sneakily rushed into your already open front door so that the neighbors wouldn’t see him. It sort of reminded you of your younger days when you were sneaking a boy in so that your parents wouldn’t catch you.

His schedule wouldn’t allow you to see him more than two times a week, but it allowed for the two of you to retain a certain level of privacy that taught him more patience. Despite the lack of consistency, each time he came to see you sent butterflies into your stomach and a need to grow closer.

It only took a month of him visiting you before the media began getting suspicious of Jin’s whereabouts. His disappearances from his home to undisclosed locations drove the world into speculation of a solo career or a new music video- or a woman.

The more the rumors ran around, the less you saw of your friend.

It was hard to be apart from Seokjin, fully aware of the fact that you were falling for him. The idea that he could possibly have feelings for you was next to impossible to believe; all you were to him was a break away from the fame and cameras. Even as he rest his head on your shoulder with an arm around your waist while you watched a movie from your couch, you found it hard to believe there was a possibility for more.

You had the world in your embrace. How could you possibly ask for more?

A year of being friends with Seokjin proved to be the ultimate trial to test your patience. You never stepped out of line, hardly ever let yourself dream of being with him, but always imagined what it would feel like to press your lips to his gorgeously plump ones.

To say you passed the test was a decently literal way of putting it.

Exactly one year and two months of knowing Kim Seokjin, not including when he was a nameless man who you sat with, was all it took for him to start showing signs of more.

You sat in your usual spots on the beach, drinking soju, when he turned to you and asked if you ever thought of dating him.

“All the time.” You blurted in response, cursing under your breath immediately afterwards at your lack of hesitation.

Instead of responding, Seokjin burst out laughing. He tipped his head back and guffawed to the night sky but all you could do was laugh cautiously with him in confusion. Worry raised in your heart at the chance that you finally crossed the line even as you swooned over his endearing laugh.

“What are you laughing at?” You built up the courage to ask after he calmed a bit.

“I promise you that I am not laughing at you. I’m actually laughing at myself.” He wiped a building tear from the corner of his eye.

“Why?” You asked.

Instead of responding to your question, he turned to you with all hints of joking wiped clean by the serious expression on his face.

“Do you want to date me?”

You stopped breathing for a moment at his question, heart seemingly skipping a beat and fingers gripping your chair tightly in disbelief.

“W-what?” You stuttered.

“Please let me know if I’ve crossed the line, but would you like to go on a date with me?” He grabbed your hand in his and held it close to his body. Even in the cold weather, his hands were as warm as ever.

Kim Seokjin thought he was crossing the line? He thought he was shooting his shot to someone he had a minor possibility of dating? Being patient couldn’t have been more rewarding than in that moment.

“I’d love to.” You smiled.

Of course, the media was all over your first date with the man.

Even from inside the fancy restaurant you sat in, you could see the camera flashes from across the room in your secluded corner. Seokjn simply waved them off and continued to sip on his wine, telling you to pretend that they weren’t there.

For you, the pressure was intense. The entire world sat on your shoulders as they tried to scare you away from the man you loved.

Despite the harsh scrutiny and the offensive comments, your time of waiting on Seokjin had thickened your skin and reinforced your resolve. Your ultimate test of patience left you with a sense of serenity in the tense world.

You could wait for the attacks to die down. You could be patient- Kim Seokjin was worth it.

As time went on, people cared less and less about your relationship after realizing that you weren’t going anywhere. You had predicted as much.

To celebrate your two-year anniversary together, your boyfriend finally asked you to move in with him.

He was nervous, to say the least. Seokjin wanted you to live with him because he found your apartment to be quite small- it was about time to give you more.

Now, two days after the proposal to move in- on his free weekend- he was helping you move out of your apartment.

Everything was going smoothly, as he expected, up until the moment you told him to go into your closet and grab the box of clothes you had set aside to donate.

He wasn’t expecting to find a small box stuffed into the back of your closet with BTS in large sparkly letters decorating the top. After he pulled it out and dusted it off, he opened it to find photocards and trinkets of his brother, Hoseok.

Gingerly, he dipped his fingers into the box and pulled out a tiny, pink pouch that perked his interest- Seokjin never faired well with fighting his curiosity of material things.

Pulling out the small chain, he let a grimace riddle his features whilst he surveyed the six silver letters of Hoseok’s name adorning it.

“Oh.” He heard from behind him, causing him to jump and quickly drop the pouch and bracelet back into the open box in his lap. “So you found those.”

“What is all this?” He asked while gesturing to said box, an ugly inferno of jealousy beginning to curl inside his stomach and snake its way up his throat. All Seokjin could think about was the fact that Hoseok was your bias and not him. Sure, he never asked, but you could have at least told him that he had competition.

“I- uh-“ You stuttered. Your hesitation to answer warranted him to stand and approach you with an eyebrow cocked and a storm brewing in his eyes.

“Am I just a ploy to get to him?” Seokjin’s anger was obvious, yet you couldn’t help the lick of excitement as he became possessive over you- a trait you rarely saw on the man.

“No!” You were quick to answer his question, closing the space between the two of you to grab his hands in your own. “Babe, I swear! Those are from years ago! Before I met any of you!”

Although Seokjin knew that you were telling the truth, he still seethed in response and let his jealousy show. You seemed to like the jealous side of him, so he decided to maximize his advantages of the situation. It was also hard to ignore that he was growing slightly uncomfortable in his pants.

“Then why do you still have them?”

“Because my friend made them for me and they’re special!” You defended, wanting him to hold your hands. His fingers wrapped around yours tightly and pulled you so that your body was flush against his. You were left to stare up at his towering frame.

“Well,” He chuckled, letting go of your hands and bending down to throw you over his shoulder. You squealed in surprise but he only growled and smacked you on the ass with so much force that you yelped out in pain.

Seokjin threw you down on your tiny bed and you looked up at him in anticipation when you noticed the sly smile thinning his plump lips. He leaned down, placing a knee between your legs, as his gaze locked with yours.

“I’ll give you something fucking special, J-hope stan.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the nickname, bringing your arms up to wrap around your shoulders as he pecked you on the lips and trailed his lips down the side of your neck.

Once he placed a kiss on top of your clothed nipple, Seokjin wasted no time in lifting your shirt over your chest to press his tongue and lips against you. You sighed, letting your eyes flutter closed as you tipped your head back and let him work over your areola.

“Does Hobi know how sensitive you are here?” He asked, licking your nipple immediately after. He brought his thumb to the other one as he kissed it again. “Would he even figure it out?”

Instead of answering, you threaded your fingers into his hair blindly, wrapping your legs around his waist while he lowered his mouth further down your body. The notion left you quaking in its wake.

His nose feathered down your stomach while he whispered his next question.

“Does he know how soft your skin is?” Seokjin pressed his lips to the skin of your waist and you craned your head up to look down at him, catching his gaze promptly. Seeing his lips against your skin had your legs pressing against his sides even tighter. “Would he even appreciate it?”

He backed up and pulled your underwear and shorts down your legs to bare your pussy to him, not wanting to tease you at all. He was on a mission and you wouldn’t stop him.

By the time he got his face between your legs, you were already spasming and dripping.

Your boyfriend looked at you with a smirk on his lips. “Could he get you this wet?”

His tongue pushed between your folds and flattened to rub against your clit to lap up once with a groan building in his chest before he pulled away. “Would he even taste you?”

You whimpered, dependent on Seokjin for pleasure as he pressed his tongue on your clit and slid two fingers into your depths to scissor you open. For a good minute, he pumped his two fingers into you and shoved his tongue onto your bundle of nerves as if trying to completely lick it off your body.

Your first orgasm was sharp and intense, causing you to cry out and dig your fingers into your boyfriend’s scalp. He pulled his lips away from you for a moment to look up at your heaving body.

“Could he even find how sensitive you are right-“ He brushed his fingers against the spot that had your mind reeling. “-here? Could he make you feel good? How would he even begin to try?”

The oversensitivity had your senses dulling and your lips babbling. “He wouldn’t. God, Jin. He wouldn’t.”

He continued to sink his fingers into you, harshly laving over your clit with his tongue in between his words as if he were fucking you already.

“You just-” Slurp. “-taste like-” Suck. “-fucking candy, baby.” You gasped at the loss of contact and squealed every time he returned his tongue and covered you with his plump lips to wildly swirl the hot muscle into you.

Being forced into more orgasms wasn’t new for you, however, it was always on his dick that you sobbed your way through countless climaxes. The pleasure of being pushed over the edge by his tongue was completely new and unabashedly erotic.

You screamed and writhed against Seokjin’s hand splayed possessively over your stomach, trying to get away from the contact but helplessly struggling against him. One after the other, you were painfully shoved into cumming, but it’s only when you squirted onto his chin that he finally let up.

“I bet he couldn’t make you squirt like that.” He darkly chuckled.

You, sweaty and breathless, lay under him with a bead of drool beginning to collect at the corner of your mouth. Mindlessly, you affirmed his statement.

“He couldn’t. He couldn’t.” It was almost as if you were chanting now.

“You’re damn right, he couldn’t.” Seokjin stood on his knees and quickly pulled his jeans down just enough for his dick to pop out before eagerly settling himself between your shaky legs once more.

Pussy raw and throbbing, you needed him to fill you properly to balance out the sensitivity on your clit. It was almost painful.

“This pussy is mine.” Seokjin grabbed his dick and looked down to slap his tip against your clit repeatedly. Your legs jerked in result, body responsive to the slightest touch on your nub. “You’re all mine.”

“Jin,” You whimpered. “Please.”

“I know, baby. I know. Be patient.” And he slid in slowly.

You dug your nails into his shoulders and threw your head back into the pillow again. The pleasure was blinding and you tensed your entire body at the sensation of him stretching out your insides.

“He could never know how tight you are.” Seokjin grit his teeth as he bottomed out. “How fucking warm-” You gasped and your eyes rolled back as he nudged his hips to try pushing himself further inside you, succeeding in dipping slightly deeper into your walls and crowding himself against your womb almost uncomfortably. “-you are.”

At this point, all you could do was sob in confirmation. “He couldn’t.”

“I’m not gonna lie.” He pulled out and thrust into you once, then twice, and then paused while heaving above you. “You got me all worked up with how cute you sound so I won’t last very long. I’m going to need you to cum one more time. Can you do that for me, love?”

You nodded almost immediately, knowing that all he needed to do was toy with your clit to send you over the edge.

With a harsh beat, your lover ferociously fucked into you and grabbed one of your thighs to widen your legs. With each clap of his skin into yours, you let out a small huff while he literally fucked the air from your lungs.

“Cum, baby. Cum right now.” He strained.

“I-” You cried, holding onto him for dear life as you desperately needed that last nudge to send you hurtling towards ecstasy. “I can’t. I n-need-“

“Hobi can’t fuck you like this, Y/N. Can’t fill you up and make you scream like I can. But you can’t cum for me?” He smashed his swollen lips onto yours and messily pushed his tongue into your mouth. When he pulled away, a string of saliva connected the two of you. “What do you need, baby? What do you need me to do?”

Your clit practically screamed for attention from your prior orgasms, but you were too focused on not actually crying to tell him. Instead, you snaked your hand down your body towards yourself and Seokjin followed your trail down to where your bodies joined, noticing immediately how swollen and red your clit was. His expression softened in realization.

“Oh, does my girl need her pussy touched?” He crooned roughly.

You nodded feverishly, sniffling.

“Okay, love. I’ll touch.” And he did.

Your orgasm was almost instantaneous. Your body, battered and exhausted, trembled as it seized up to accept his thrust for the last time that evening. In all its pain and bliss, your climax was glorious.

“Oh fuckfuckfuckfuck-” Seokjin growled as he dropped his head to the crook of your neck. “Squeezing me all tight like that. You’d never squeeze Hobi like that.”

Even through your pleasure, you felt him clutch onto you tightly, slowing his thrusts and sinking himself deeply to empty his release into you.

“That’s my girl.” He groaned after he stilled, slumping against you. For a moment, the two of you breathed and relaxed in each other’s presence.

You chuckled, turning your head to kiss his head. “That was pretty hot, babe.”

His head shot up from your shoulder immediately. “Not at all! How could you stan Hobi and not me?”

“Babe, I was so much younger. Of course, the one who is a literal ball of sunshine was my bias. You can’t get enough of Hobi.”

“But I’m your boyfriend…” His eyebrows turned up at you and pouted all the while his dick still lay wedged between your legs. Slowly, you pushed him off of you so that you could go clean up.

As you stood, you walked to the bathroom and laughed again. “Yes, you are.”

Even as you were walking away, you heard him mutter under his breath.

“Hobi would never walk away from me like that.”

All you could do was giggle at his statement, knowing that he would eventually get over it. 

Kim Seokjin was the one you loved. Who was Jung Hoseok?

~#~

If you’d like to read more of my work, feel free to check out my Masterlist!