#jesus fucking christ this is depressing

[cringefail-clown]

four kids and an ai play a game more at 10

[minothtime]

The tragedy that is the Barnes family, who had to watch their only son and his best friend both leave marching towards a war that would eventually claim them, who died without ever knowing they would be alive and reunited in the far future, who died believing they would meet Bucky again yet never did...

And also the tragedy of Bucky and Steve never getting to see their family again, who have to live with the knowledge that they're still alive while Winifred or George or Becca aren't, whose last memory of them is a painful goodbye and broken promises...

Not to mention how Sarah Rogers never was more than a footnote in Captain America's story, when she probably worked so hard just to keep Steve alive and happy, who is only remembered by two (broken, lonely, sad) people, who never got to see the good her son would do...

[cthulhu-with-a-fez]

my datemate has been thoroughly educating me about final fantasy 7, including showing me the movie, which had absolutely zero plot whatsoever and it was PERFECT that way??? like. must a movie have things happen in it. can it not simply be an hour and forty minutes of flexing how many polygons the animation department has access to now via baller fight scenes loosely strung together to make a character study. advent children was a masterpiece, you cannot change my mind.

[mountainhaunt]

forever envious of the bipolar types that have euphoric mania. what do you mean you don't purely feel irate and paranoid and restless the whole time? what do you mean it feels good and you long for it when it's away?? where is ur rage? where is ur depersonalization?? what is this natural high of which u speak

[maddestmewmew]

HI IF ANY FNAF FANS ARE READING THIS THE TAGS ARE HERE FOR BLOCKLIST NOT FOR. TRYING TO REACH FNAF FANS…THERES NO HATE UNDER THE CUT ITS JUST ME BEING REALLY FUCKING CONFUSED ABT FNAF LORE

ok now thats out of the way. JESUS CHRIST have i just entered a fucking. rabbit hole?? OH MY GOD??? i was a massive fnaf fan in my preteen years, as was everyone ever in the 2010s..ive dialed back my enjoyment of it, ill watch playthroughs of the mainline games and ive seen the movie but thats kind of it. this being relevent bc i watched an into the pit playthrough, and then saw some tweets about it. MOST of them i understood, until i hit a tweet talking abt some kid named andrew?? and how hes not an sci??? and i was like Hold On. maybe its been some years but i cant be THAT behind can i. i know all the important names..michael afton and cassidy and charlie and what have you..

so i look up the wiki for this kid andrew, and it leads me to a story about a ghost kid attatching himself to william aftons spirit and torturing him and shit. i was a bit confused bc like. isnt that cassidys thing? but Whatevs. also the stories seemed weirdly bizzare to me, like not in a hateful way but like. why is william afton getting an exorcism. anyway it brings up a couple (A LOT) of names i dont understand, but what my brain latches onto is this kid jake, who is described as forcing andrew to Stop torturing english willy, at the cost of Now Hes Stuck Possessing An Endoskeleton. okayyy this is fnaf to me. i didnt know this but its abt what i expect from five nights at freddys.

so i head to jakes wiki out of curiosty, and find out he is from, no joke, one of the most fucking depressing stories ive ever read? i dont mean in terms of fnaf, i mean, FUCKING EVER. JESUS. CHRIST.

its like. in the middle of a fazbear frights book. fazbear frights being these scary stories to tell in the dark type books where its collections of spoooky stories that will shape the minds of children everywhere, but like. fnaf themed.

this story is called “the real jake” and i Highly reccomend you read the wiki instead of hearing it from me like. fourth hand. like im retelling a retelling here. but if you want that ultra telephone sypnosis, here you go:

“the real jake” follows a nine year old boy who is bedridden. with cancer. his mother is dead and his father is overseas. jake is taken care of full time by a nanny, margie.

jake likes to talk with a boy in his cupboard, named simon, who is really his father over the phone, through a walkie talkie. at first, jake and “simon” talk about what jake has done that day, but jake cannot leave his bed, so jake gets frustrated that all his stories are so mundane and depression. so one day simons like, okay, tell me what the REAL jake has done. and its a little game of pretend, where jake tells these silly little stories about what the “real jake” did that day. one day, jakes friend tries to get him to sneak out to go to the arcade, and tries to get him there by dragging him in a wagon, but jake is too weak to make it to make it to the wagon and collapses and throws up, and he explains to margie he wanted to be the real jake for a day.

at some point jake and margie are playing chess, and jake gets super frustrated that he cant see straight. margie calms him down and jake tells her that he loves her, causing margie to break down, and then she Later Finds Out The Doctors Are Ceasing Treatment For Him, which makes margie realize she loves jake as a son.

AND THEN MARGIE GETS THE CALL THAT JAKES FATHER WAS FUCKING KILLED. and she has full custody of jake. she cant bring herself to tell him his father died, so she says simon wont be able to visit for a while.

AND THEN JAKE FUCKING DIES.

AND THAT IS IT. THAT IS THE END OF THE STORY . THEY JUST MOVE ON AFTER THAT. HOLY FUCK??? IMAGINE BEING LIKE 9 AND PICKING UP THE LATEST FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDYS BOOK AT THE SCHOOLASTIC BOOK FAIR AND THEN READING A STORY ABOUT A LITTLE BOY COPING WITH HIS CANCER AND THEN FUCKING DYING ALONE. FREDDY FAZBEAR WASNT EVEN THERE.

[southernreaches]

god this is so. so upsetting to me

[apocalypticdemon]

so i'm finally reading through the terror scripts and i think this was designed to cause me physical pain.

crozier was supposed to be drinking to schubert..... god

[seenthisepisode]

woah truly nothing fucks you up like family

[butnotbubblegum]

using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, don’t read them if you’re having a bad day, they’ll probably not help in the slightest.

[icedmetaltea]

Time to do that thing where when I can't make myself feel better I try to help other ppl again here we gooo

. You're not an annoyance . You're not a burden . You're more than what you create . No, everything you make is not terrible . The spark of creativity will come again . You will one day feel proud of what you create again . You're not alone in your pain . You're not "faking it" . People don't think you complain 24/7 just bc you're going through it . Fuck it even if you do complain a lot you're allowed to . Keeping everything to yourself and bottling shit up is not strength . You do not have to be quiet about what hurts you . You're allowed to feel bad . You're allowed to make mistakes . You're allowed to take up space . You're allowed to speak and be loud . You're allowed to make things for yourself and nobody else . Healing is not linear . Other peoples' hardships are not more valid than your own . If it hurts you, it means something . If something small hurt you, it means something . If someone close or even a stranger hurt you, it means something . If you're sad for no reason, it's ok . If you're scared for no reason, it's ok . It's ok to sleep with the lights on . It's ok to reach out for help . It's okay to cry . It's okay to struggle with eating/sleeping/getting out of bed . You're enough . This will pass

[anxietyfrappuccino]

being christian or christian ajacent is so weird like,,, i don't believe the same things other christians believe.

i think reincarnation is legit despite hating the idea of being reincarnated. i don't think one lifetime is enough to find god.

i don't think fighting over land to establish a country is necessary. god gave us a whole fucking planet but you want this specific piece of it so much you're willing to kill to obtain it? fuck that just be nice and love thy neighbor. fuck borders honestly.

the bible was written from the perspective of men, it's flawed. it's full of war and racism and misogynistic metaphors. we, humans, have matured over time, but the people who think the bible is perfect are like the people who believe the united states constitution is perfect. it's not, and we shouldn't be acting like the human perspective can't experience growth. we grow individually. we grow collectively. people stagger that progress when they keep sticking to old harmful way of existing.

who is to say that after jesus ascended back to heaven, the men who eventually wrote the bible didn't change the story? we all know they've been altering it since it since it was published!!! it is impossible to write that much word and not give bias.

god/jesus said in the future his people would go to war. this seems to be some sort of justification for countries to create war. all i know to say is that going to war does not equate to starting a war. things are not worth going to war for. people are worth going to war for, to protect them, but it's never okay to instigate war.

being a medium is not witchcraft. it's a gift. crystals are not witchcraft. they're pretty rocks that may or may not hold a bit of magic and grace in them. either way, it's not harming anyone to have a comfort item or something harmless to believe in. astrology is not "new age" or witchcraft. it's been around for centuries in every part of the world. it's reading stars for fucksake. let people have a fun way of understanding themselves.

love is love and love also really fucking loses is human and it's more perfect than the bible will ever be. it's authentic, and it's natural. realizing i'm queer made me a better person. it opened me up to caring more about people and understanding people. i can't thank god enough for my orientations.

you can't just give up anxiety or trauma to god. you can't just pray it away and forget about it. that shit alters your brain. you have to work through it in order to heal, and i believe god wants to help his children work through their hurt, not attempt to throw it away like a dirty dinner plate into the trash. you've got to wash your damn dishes. it's takes time, and it's harder for some people than others. AND MENTAL ILLNESS IS NOT DEMONIC. sorry, had to say it louder for the people in the back.

there may be other things i'm not aligned with, but this is what i can remember rn

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

me: hermes is a painfully accurate example of how some ways of defending yourself against certain kinds of insidious emotional abuse, gaslighting, ableism, and therapy speak can warp you into a person whose learned helplessness and lack of perspective can result in doing really shitty things, and who passes that abuse along in different forms (hi meteion) + lashes out in disproportionate ways + can be deeply hypocritical.

me: as a disabled person in a society where our systemic mass murder via pressure into government-sanctioned suicide is on the rise, the ancients' society is beyond fucking upsetting to me. i have zero sympathy for anything to do with them pre-apocalypse except for the effects of living in that system.

me: that said, they are a good opportunity to remind oneself that there are children in that burning building; that a society being fucked does not mean they deserve to be wiped out; and that that does not mitigate the harm they do, nor mean that its victims are not allowed to be angry or resist it, including the victims inside it.

me, booboo the fool: oh, this youtube essay about hermes looks interesting--

[nohoperadio]

I've made the beanfluencer beans enough times now that I've used up two full jars of miso paste, and the reason this is high praise is because miso paste is exactly the kind of grocery I would typically buy for a recipe I only make once and never find another use for and throw it away after two months cos it's gone bad. Feels pleasantly novel to be low on a jarred substance and have to buy more of it because I want more.

BONUS MISO TRUTH: I first went vegan (from vegetarian) when I was 18, I chose as the transition day the exact day I moved out of my mom's place to start uni, which was a horrible decision for countless reasons, among which was the fact that I had essentially no experience at all with cooking or indeed food shopping at this point. And 2010 was a very different era, at least where I am there wasn't like a bunch of stuff labelled "plant-based" on the shelves, food brands didn't acknowledge the concept at all and it wasn't that uncommon to meet people who didn't even know what vegan meant. Veganism was genuinely hard mode back then. Anyway one of the first purchases I made in my new life was a thing of miso paste, because it was one of the few real food items I found in the store that was vegan-legal, but I didn't know what the fuck it was and all I could think to do with it was smear it thickly on some toast. Which tasted really bad! So I threw it away. And that's roughly how good I was at veganism and indeed all of the rest of my life for about the next five years.

[lovelyisadora]

I just got home and I sat down for all of thirty seconds before my giant cat came and sat on me girl let me breathe

[fishgut]

[clits-and-clips]

Moving back in with my parents has actually been a wake up call. They are not travelling well at all which I knew, but had no idea of how bad it really is. Keep your family close and for fuck sake check up on your friends PLEASE