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#just a few of my favourite quote’s
maybesomemilo · 2 months
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As if this series wasn’t already my everything.
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beneath-the-mask · 11 months
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"And I will hoard them as a dragon does her gold- for my memories with you are the most precious of all."
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uhbasicallyjustmilex · 9 months
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quotes from alex turner's favourite authors that make me want to put my face through a wall:
"although i have never been an actor in the strict sense of the word, i have nevertheless, in real life, always carried about with me a small folding theatre" - vladimir nabokov, despair
"there is a terrible emptiness in me, an indifference that hurts," - albert camus
"there is no trap so deadly as the trap you set for yourself" - raymond chandler
"at eight, he had once told his mother that he wanted to paint air" - vladimir nabokov
"no man ever understands quite his own artful dodges to escape from the grim shadow of self-knowledge" - joseph conrad
"everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it" - david foster wallace
"we're all lonely for something we don't know we're lonely for. how else to explain the curious feeling that goes around feeling like missing somebody we've never even met?" - david foster wallace
"i turn over a new leaf every day, but the blots show through" - keith waterhouse
"the truth will set you free. but not until it's finished with you" - david foster wallace
"curiosity is insubordination in its purest form" - vladimir nabokov
"i'm me and nobody else; and whatever people think i am or say i am, that's what i'm not, because they don't know a bloody thing about me" - alan sillitoe
"we live as we dream; alone” - joseph conrad
"i liked, as i like still, to make words look self-conscious and foolish, to bind them by mock marriage of a pun, to turn them inside out, to come upon them unwares" - vladimir nabokov, despair
"whatever you get paid attention to for is never what you think is most important about yourself" - david foster wallace
"i continued to stir my tea long after it had done all it could with the milk” - vladimir nabokov, despair
"i remained too much inside my head and ended up losing my mind" - edgar allan poe
"all the information i have about myself is from forged documents" - vladimir nabokov, despair
"how odd i can have all this inside me and to you its just words" - david foster wallace
"you will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. you will never live if you're looking for the meaning of life" - albert camus
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leslutdepointedulac · 26 days
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Do you wanna know what's making me sad today? During the séance in Merrick, even when Claudia's telling Louis to kill himself, and she's hurting him in every way possible (both emotionally and physically), Louis was still more concerned for her than he was for himself.
"Merrick, don't let her go into uncertain darkness. Merrick, guide her!"
Even after he's been ridiculed and stabbed by her, he still can't bear the thought of her suffering. He still wants to protect her and ensure she'll be alright. No matter what Claudia does, no matter what she says, no matter how badly she hurts Louis, she will always be his little girl in his eyes.
And I suppose that's part of the problem, is that he still sees her as a child. But at the same time, he's a parent, and parents will always have an aspect of seeing their children as their babies, no matter how old they are. And they'll always have that instinct to love and protect them. Louis is simply a father loving and grieving for his daughter.
What also breaks me, is later that night after the séance, when Louis' talking to David. At the beginning of the book, it says how Jesse and David have heard the sound of music and bird song, but Louis hasn't, and this upsets him.
"Oh, I know it must be tantalizing," I said, finally. "It's so easy to conclude that we're coming close." "No," he said, turning to me politely. "Don't you see, David? You heard the music. I haven't heard it. Jesse heard the music. I've never heard it. Never. And I've been years waiting to hear it, asking to hear it, wanting to hear it, but I never do." His French accent was sharp and precise, as always happened when he was emotional, and I loved the richness it gave to his speech.
That night, in the middle of a conversation with David, Louis stops and looks likes he's listening to something.
"David, do you hear it?" he asked with mounting excitement. "David, listen!" [. . .] "David, listen to it. It's all around us." He rose to his feet, his left hand still pressed to the pain he felt. "David, it's Claudia, it's the music, it's the harpsichord. I hear it all around us. David, she wants me to come. I know it."
The way he goes from sadness to pure joy and excitement at what he thinks is a sign from Claudia is so sad, especially after everything he's experienced. For so long he's longed to hear the sound of the music, for so long he's been living in his misery, and now this one thing is what makes him happy. He's so deep in his own depression, that even after the events with Claudia, he's convinced this is her doing, and he's joyful about it.
He was gazing off, mesmerized and comforted, and his eyes were glazed and his face was softened and unchallenging. "I know that sonata. I remember it. And yes, she loved it, she loved it because Mozart had written it when he was only a child. You can't hear, can you? But you did once, think back on it. It's so very lovely, and how fast she plays, my Claudia." He made a dazed laugh. The tears thickened; his eyes were veiled in blood.
Louis immediately finds peace and comfort in hearing the ghosts of the past, like he can really feel Claudia right there with him in the flat. He also acknowledges how she loved Mozart so much because he found success at such a young age, and he realises how Claudia found solace in that in a way. She may have felt less alone in knowing that there had been someone else who, despite their young age, had seemed so beyond their years. And the way Louis refers to her as 'my Claudia', shows how he's still so immensely proud of her, and how he still feels nothing but love for her.
"I hear the birds singing. Listen. I hear them in their cage. The others—all our kind who know of her—they think of her as heartless, but she wasn't heartless. She was only aware of things which I didn't learn till so many decades had passed. She knew secrets that only suffering can teach. . . ." His voice trailed off. He pulled back gracefully from my grasp and he walked to the center of the room. He turned about as though the music were truly surrounding him.
Louis is aware of the fact that Claudia did what she did as a result of her suffering and her pain at being trapped, both in her child's body and by her fathers. It's like he can't bring himself to see any wrong in what she did. Louis knows that because of her predicament, it caused her to see the world in a way he wouldn't be able to understand, until he too has experienced great pain in his life.
Claudia was far more experienced in her suffering than he or anyone else could ever give her credit for. What she went through was a very personal and individual experience, that couldn't have been taught by her directly, but through Louis' own journey through life.
"Don't you see what a kindness she's done?" he whispered. "It's going on and on, David, it's getting all the more rapid. Claudia, I'm listening to you." He broke off, and turned again, his eyes moving over everything yet seeing, nothing. "Claudia, I'll be with you very soon."
He's so convinced that what he's hearing is Claudia trying to communicate with him. He genuinely believes that she's doing him a favour by giving him permission to leave this life, and join her in death. He's so desperate and so blinded by his grief and his love for her, that he's willing to do the unthinkable, in the hopes that it might please her and release them both from their hurt.
He stood still with his head bowed. His hands had dropped to his sides. He seemed infinitely sad and infinitely defeated. "Has it stopped?" I asked. "Yes," he whispered. Slowly he looked up, lost for the moment, then getting his bearings.
The second he can't hear the music anymore, Louis feels as though he's lost that connection with Claudia; the one bit of communication from her he felt he had left. The thought that he's lost her all over again brings him back down to the reality of the situation: that Claudia's no longer with him.
As for him, he stood as before, elegant in his faded black, a man dreaming, the blood dried in his eyes and giving him a dreadful look, as he stared off again, distant from my heated compassion, cutting himself off from any solace I could bring. "You'll meet me tomorrow," I said. He nodded. "The birds are gone now," he whispered. "I can't even hum the music inside my head." He seemed unbearably distressed.
There's nothing that David can do to reach Louis at this point. The only thing that can bring him any sort of comfort is Claudia, and having some form of connection with her again. Even after David tries to make him promise they'll meet, to try and convince Louis not to do anything, all Louis can do is vaguely acknowledge it before going back to what he previously heard.
He's heartbroken that after all this time of not hearing anything, he finally had what he thought was communication with Claudia, only for it to disappear again like it never even happened. That music and bird song were the only things bringing him comfort, and now it's gone, along with Claudia, lost to him once again.
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mysticarcanum · 6 months
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actually utopia losing that poll was good actually because it gave me an excuse to rewatch it and have a Category 10 Brain Event
#it's been a few years since ive watched it#but ive certainly watched it over a dozen times. i have quite a few scenes i can quote line for line#but ALSO i dont think ive watched it since i became. as obsessed with the master as i am#and GOD the little details DELIGHTED me!!!#theres a with a little ainley master chuckle#and a line from i presume the daemons of the delgado!master going 'destroy him! and you will give your power to me'#its just such a stunning homage to classic who masters before becoming a gateway into the new who style of the character#jacobi definitely plays the master with more classic mannerisms which i ADORE#but it's so lovely to see the mannerisms he establishes for his master in the few minutes of screentime that he has#that he then carries forward into his audio content#and it's fun for me to see the facial expressions associated with those verbal tics!!!#GOD and like. as much as simm!master is my least favourite master#he really did set the groundwork for a different approach to the character which i find DELIGHTFUL#like. simm set the groundwork for what gomez and dhawan executed so brilliantly#and i do think he was just largely hindered by rtd simply not knowing how to write the master well. and then that characterization stuck#when he appeared in waet/tdf#but JACOBI#god. what a legend. the way he plays yana makes me insane also#i also found out he was gay like last week which is INSANE and so lovely. how did i not know that#also god murray gold was off his SHITS in utopia fr#i. dear lord i know this episode too well. it's in the same place in my brain as boom town#but it's combined with my later developed obsession with jacobi!master. to devestating effect#also like. say what you will about the drums plotline (dumb as hell) but by god the four beats is something that is so good to tap#while you are being normal about an episode of doctor who
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fragmentedblade · 6 months
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The story in the longetivity pill of cruelty, and Wenyuan's words when being offered to take it wow
#I talk too much#Traces#Fragments and scraps#Not to be 'Jin.gliu's quest' about it‚ but Jingli.u's quest#The way he talks about the pain being all that's left and that being better than nothing?#I think I saved here a few lines by both Jingli.u and Blade quoting also a line in a poem about Orpheu.s precisely playing with this concep#Then there's the vidyadhara mention which is also ehem. It seems also to be a reference to Otto ('a blond scientist'?)?#I was already loving this quest and this chapter in particular before with the ghost of a lost beloved and the similarity with#the Zhuming opera about consuming the beloved (god I just love the Zhuming more and more haha)#but they really included all my favourite things‚ characters and references in this universe#I've been thinking about that Zhuming opera ever since the update dropped to no end precisely due to the fact the Zhuming inhabitants#seem to sort of... live alongside heliobi in a more natural way which is very interesting and again enhances the everconstant idea#of the Xianzhou craftmanship and Abundance going closely together‚ but mainly I've been thinking on the potential ramifications#of the story in the opera. Heliobi seem to 'learn' emotions and pick habits and traits from the people they possess#The opera we are taught has the heliobi consume the lover in a passionate dance and leave‚ and I wondered#I wondered if the beloved knew. I wondered if he cared. I wondered if the heliobi felt anything at all for their husband;#I think I'm more I'm inclined to think they didn't given the fragment of the opera we are shown#But it also made me wonder about other situations in which the lover may have known and/or the heliobi may have developed feelings too#And here it was‚ this small glimpse into what that story could look like. I really loved the story of these two#I'm playing on my secondary account I use to explore different options (the playthroughs are never as thorough as I am)#and here I've captured it‚ but with the full intent of letting them go in my main account#This dialogue was pretty (there were some typos and some weird translations that felt a bit fanon translated though?) and I doubt#letting them go will give me better lines than I got here with Wenyuan clinging to his grief if that's all he has left‚ but I like the idea#of them leaving together. The only thing comparable to being consumed by the grief of losing the beloved is being consumed by love itself#What a magnificent pyre#Oh this mission also made me wonder about Huo Huo. Why does she not get consumed by the mere fact of being constantly in proximity of Tail?#It must not be something intentional because Ruoxi didn't seem to want to consume Wenyuan either. Is it because Tail is sealed?#But if so‚ couldn't they have done that to Ruoxi and Wenyuan? I wonder if they'll explain this later
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partywithponies · 21 days
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Doctor Who fandom gothic:
Everyone is angry. You do not know what about. Everyone is always angry. The reason is different every day. Your mutual threatens to blow up the entire BBC and then kill themself. You ask what they are angry about. They do not know.
"We love stories!" says Big Finish. They love stories so much. There must always be more stories. "We love stories!" they say. "Buy this complete series! You love stories! You must listen to all the stories!" You look. The full series costs every penny you own, but it must be done, for the love of stories. You refresh the page. There are ten more audios in the series now. In tears, you decide to start selling your internal organs, to afford more stories. You have to do this. You love stories.
A new episode just aired. You check twitter. "This is the best episode of television ever to air! Peak television! Nothing could ever top this! I worship at the altar of this episode! I am naming my firstborn child after this episode!" says one tweet. "This episode was worst the worst episode of television ever to air. I have been harmed physically by being forced to watch it. We need to kill the showrunner." says the next. You think they both have a point.
The Rani is coming. You know this to be true, because the fandom told you so. The fandom tells you this every few months. They are surely correct this time. You must be constantly vigilant, because The Rani could be anyone. That old lady is The Rani. The companion is The Rani. That baby is The Rani. You are The Rani.
"This is my favourite episode!" says your mutual. You look. It is a single fuzzy freezeframe, while muffled voices play faintly in the background. Your mutual beams. "Groundbreaking television!", they say.
There is a new meme in the fandom. It is a single line from an episode that aired 47 years ago. Everyone you know is quoting this line. Your favourite fanartist just posted fanart of the character speaking this line. Your favourite youtuber just posted a dance remix. You go to comicon. You are greeted by 100 cosplayers, all dressed as the character. They chant the line in unison. You have never been more confused in your life. You smile. You laugh. You join in.
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taasgirl · 1 month
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lover - oscar piastri
summary: y/n is a songwriter who writes plenty of songs however no one realizes that they're made by her (and about oscar hehe)!
a/n: the outcomes of the races are fictional, and the order in which these songs have been written (assume fearless was written this year ygwim?). also no face claim!!
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liked by yukitsunoda, oscarpiastri, and 33, 287 others ynusername romance is not dead if you keep it just yours! lovelovelove being able to come home for race day!! i'm so proud of u osc 🩷
oscarpiastri I'm so lucky 🥰 liked by ynusername
user27633 Y/N IS A SWIFTIE CONFIRMED!?!?!
ynusername of course!!
user16372 u literally take the cutest photos of oscar
user82537 y/n quoting paris... i'm so up
yukitsunoda 😆😆
landonorris You're my favourite wag
ynusername wow how considerate
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liked by taylorswift, landonorris, and 1, 287, 387 others oscarpiastri Unwinding before Japan 👊
ynusername tehee we're cute
oscarpiastri You're cuter landonorris Get a room
taylorswift ooooh she's working hard @ ynusername
user62584 WHAT THE FUCK ARE U DOING HERE???
user98274 OSCAR IS FRIENDS WITH TAYLOR HUH
user61192 i did not expect to see taylor in the comments of oscar's post tagging y/n!
user92898 no fr like what is going on
user93829 Everyone shut up about taylor look at the beauty that is y/n omd
view ynusername's story...
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liked by jackantonoff, phoebebridgers, and 55, 918, 278 others taylorswift In honour of my album 'The Tortured Poets Department' release a week ago, I wanted to thank my biggest musical inspirations! Thank you Jack, Lana, and Y/N for helping me the best artist I could possibly be, without you'd guys I'd be nowhere (thank you y/n for writing the cheesiest, cutest, sexiest songs ever)!!
user51862 who is y/n
user01827 She's dating f1 driver oscar piastri but also now apparently a songwriter idk...
user72973 Wdym thanks y/n for writing?? you're telling me the twitter stans were right??
user62863 y/n is singlehandedly uniting f1 and the swifties
ynusername thank u tay 💓💓
user52868 Girl has been living a double life
user51929 ohhh so this is why taylor was commenting on oscar's post😭
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liked by oscarpiastri, taylorswift, and 108, 276 others ynusername well now that the cat is out of the bag, who wants to hear a story? i assume u all said yes.
on one of our first dates, oscar made me a bracelet (yes that one) and i thought (and still think) that it was one of the most romantic gestures. so obviouslyyy i wrote 'lover' about him hehe. yes we only knew each other for at most three months when i wrote it, but i love him so much, he's my forever.
oscarpiastri I love having a singer for a girlfriend (wife one day)
ynusername hello cat boy
user18739 You're telling me that taylor's most romantic song is literally written by my favourite wag about my favourite driver?? i might pass out
ynusername haha yes! i write a lot of songs for tay
landonorris So this song is basically about ur delusions liked by ynusername
user52863 oh now i need to know exactly what songs you've written
user20939 AND PLEASE RECORD COVERS OF THEM TOO
lilymhe wait so you've been friends with taylor the whole time...
lilymhe AND THE SONG THAT I WANT PLAYED AT MY WEDDING IS WRITTEN ABOUT OSCAR?? ynusername oh my god lily HAHA
let me know if you liked this!! i know it's super short but i'm seriously lacking inspo and ideas omd. also i literally love oscar so much.
i'm also working on a few reqs, so if you have a suggestion or request, let me know because i'd love to do it!!
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rageserenity · 3 months
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It's 2024. Are you still thinking about movieverse!Cherik? Because I am.
For the past several months, there's only been a very slow trickle of posts/fics in the xmcu cherik tag. Let's try to breathe some life back into this incredible pairing!
With one clear winner of my poll, here's thirty prompts for the thirty days of April. (This is a super chill, laid-back event---do these in any order, interpret them as loosely as you like! Create in any medium! Fic, art, gifs, meta, incoherent screaming about the otp…all winners in my book.)
The only rule here is to cherik too close to the sun. Alright. Here are the prompts.
Mutual Pining
Doesn't really even need elaboration! Write that horrifically slow slow-burn. Gif every time McAvoy made insane fuck me eyes on screen. Make a playlist of songs about impossible love.
2. Alternate Meetings
There are endless quotes about how these two complete each other in a way no one they'd met before or after ever did. How else could they have met?
3. Erik Has A Telepathy Kink
This is basically canon. Let my boy get freaky!
4. Canon Fix-It
All the times Fox fucked it up. There are endless options.
5. Hurt/Comfort
Put them in that Situation. Put them in that Blender. Break them apart and put them back together ❤️‍🩹
6. Canon Compliant
Draw that missing scene! Gif your favourite cherik moment!
7. Beach Divorce
Make it worse. Make it better. Show it to us exactly how it was. Break it down in a 3,000 word meta. Go wild!
8. Domestics
Sometimes you just want to see them doing normal couple things. Erik put the gun down.
9. Found Family
The real heart of x-men!
10. Time Travel
There are SO many possibilities here. Stick them in a time loop. Give them a chance to change their past.
11. AU
Love a good AU!
12. There Is Only One Bed
Had to get this one in here. What better way to amp up the tension?
13. Genosha
By some miracle, cherik actually did end up together at the end of 2019s trash bag disaster Dark Phoenix. We aren’t making a big enough deal about this.
14. Declaration(s) of Love
Who says it first? How do they say it and when? Have they said it…without saying it?
15. Jealousy
Need I say more.
16. Reunion
These two have absolutely no chill.
17. Soulmates
Classic prompt, had to get this in here too.
18. The DOFP Aircraft
The TENSION here. Break it down for me. How does Charles feel about his injury? How does Erik feel about his injury?
19. Gay Mutant Road Trip
You already know.
20. Body Swap
SO fun when people have superpowers.
21. First Kiss
When? How? Who initiated it?
22. The Mansion
Mansion!content is a genre of its own.
23. Conflicting Ideology
Give me your theses. Who’s right? Can they ever reconcile completely? Write a fic where it drives them apart.
24. Sebastian Shaw
A trope unto himself.
25. Team As Matchmaker
They had to have known something was going on, didn’t they?
26. Cooking
Charles deserves a good meal. Also, imagine Erik using his powers in the kitchen. The sheer domesticity…
27. Hurt No Comfort
Plenty of scope with these two 🥲
28. Growing Old Together
Giving Sirs Ian Mckellan and Patrick Stewart their props as well!
29. Making Up
*pushes chess board across the table* sorry babe
30. Charles Xavier Did More For Mutants Than You'll Ever Know
Rising to each other’s defense. Only I can insult this man.
I will be tracking #revivecherik to reblog stuff! Here’s a fic collection for the same. Let’s get this ball rolling! Please feel free to send me an ask if you’ve got anything to say! And most importantly, let’s all have fun 😁
*I know a few of you preferred something like a gift exchange because of the commitment factor—I’m super down to organise a tiny one for the handful of us! If this promptathon doesn’t flop horribly, we can hopefully do a whole bunch of stuff :)
If you read this post all the way through, please reblog for reach! Thank you! Hoping you participate come April.
Shoutout to @inmymagnetoera for reaching out and helping with this!
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pirateprincessblog · 9 months
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Strawberry Mocha
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𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫.: your favorite café has a new barista, and he seems oddly familiar, especially when you see his hands move when he prepares your favourite beverage 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jung wooyoung x reader, ft yunho 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 24.7k 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: barista!wooyoung, student!reader, camboy!wooyoung, virgin!reader, hopelesslyinlove!yunho 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: masturbation, mutual masturbation, sexting, public oral, public fingering, blindfold, slight bondage, toys, edging
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, v-card loss, angst on yunho's side 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: pussy drunk wooyo idk man also i imagine wooyo as bouncy wooyo here with that hot ass hair purr but make it oreo like he had it in aotm
𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫s 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.
nsfw link(s): one
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anastasya wants to chat! click here to see one new message.
"hello, gorgeous. want to see my pussy?" - tina, less than 10 km away.
luciano is more than ready to show you the 8th world wonder.
"close. close. close." your words are synchronized with the clicking of your mouse. with each minute passing, each click is getting more aggressive.
sick and tired of all the sex ads interrupting your studying over an illegally found textbook, you bury your head into your pillow. your back hurts from laying on your stomach for hours, but it is the only position that helps you with period cramps. the laptop makes a noise again, one you've heard enough of for the last few hours.
"i really don't want to fuck you, nick." you whine, clicking at the x in the corner of the new ad. when it opens three new tabs, all you can do is groan and close the laptop. you have an exam tomorrow, today is your first day of the period, which means tomorrow it's going to be worse, and to make things better, you are bombarded with photos of nude men and women, with attached locations, chat boxes and quotes. you feel sick.
yet again, you have just a little more of this lesson left, and if you could manage to spend so many hours fighting the virus bots, you can do it for ten more minutes. all out of motivation and will to live, you turn the laptop back on. the screen brightness almost blinds you, you forget how dark it has become and how bright your screen is. your eyes skim over the words, your brain so focused on focusing, that you forget to focus. you are frustrated, in pain, your hair is so greasy you could model it like clay, and your are nails half bitten off.
three minutes until your sleeping schedule starts, and five more long paragraphs to read. taking a deep breath, you click the arrow to scroll. as if the laptop is mocking you, it delivers you another message.
wooyoung (23), offers both mental and physical relief. check it out!
the ad flashes across the whole screen, the x not even visible on this one. you don't feel anything anymore. you've gone completely numb. accepted your fate. this will be your reminder to not study the last day ever again. you stare at the pink letters, then the picture on the side of it. it shows a young man, and oddly enough, not all oiled up and naked on it. it is a selfie, and in it he lays on the bed in the same position as you. how odd, to put a normal and clothed person on a sex ad.
"fuck it."
you drag the arrow over the highlighted letters, sighing. months, maybe even a whole year spent without a sexual contact. you didn't crave it. nothing in real life turned you on. maybe you didn't pay enough attention. maybe you've overgrown simple flirting and poor tries of having one night stands at parties. maybe all those young adult fantasy books on your shelves have raised your standards. looking back at the things that used to get you going makes you cringe. you've evolved from poorly acted out porn videos, to pages full of dark haired morally grey characters, blindfolds, leather gloves, candle wax, and whatnot.
you have yet to try out anything other than poor rubbings over the jeans you've received, not even orgasming. one night, three whole minutes of a drunk guy almost irritating your skin from harsh rubs, and a fake moan later, you start to wonder if you're the problem. proposing the idea of anything other than missionary and oral would make you the weird one, especially since you're a virgin. men here are shallow, and would rather jerk off to an amateur movie than try to match your standards and make the whole thing actually enjoyable.
the link you've clicked on doesn't open multiple tabs like the previous ones did. instead, it opens a single site, which first asks you to register and confirm your age. eager to see if the man in the picture was really the one offering such services, you log in with your google account, which unknowingly to you, used your picture and real name to set up the new account. your notes and pens are discarded on the floor, and your focus is on the man currently showing off his rings.
his hands are veiny, that is the first thing you notice. decorated with silver rings, nails neatly trimmed, with the pinky one painted black, and fingers oddly satisfying to look at. he brushes those same fingers through his hair, making it change colour for a split second. you notice that he is half blonde, which just makes you realize that sleep is not an option tonight. at least not yet.
"anyone want to open today's topic before i start?" he offers, scrolling through the comments.
you watch as people comment various topics and requests, the main one being for him to start touching himself already. for a sex cam, he does quite a lot of talking. maybe that's why you haven't left the site yet, but are staring at the way his teeth are biting his lip while his eyes focus on the bright screen.
"your friends are shaming you for having a threesome?" he reads out loud, then sighs. "they're probably virgins. or inexperienced girls who got fucked once then dumped. only they shame people for their sexual desires. they have no creativity at all. i can't imagine jerking off with just my hand anymore. feels bland. don't worry about them."
your fingers are quicker than your brain, and before you even register it, you hit send.
a soft laugh travels to your ears, and you just know it's because of your comment.
"you beg to differ?" he says, brushing his hair back again. he takes a moment to think. his rings shine under the dimmed lights, and you can't help but wonder how it would be to feel that cool sensation on your body.
you'd love to have him feel you up and down with this rings on, a cold contrast on your hot skin. you wouldn't budge if he were to put that hand against your neck, giving it light squeezes just enough to give you a thrill. you'd even let him do it in front of that camera of his, make all of these thirsty girls jealous because you're the one moaning his name. shit, you're really into him. or rather this whole situation. and he hasn't done a single sexual gesture.
"a virgin on my page. interesting." the young man hums, his eyebrows scrunched. "isn't life boring as a virgin? i mean, what do you do?"
i study, you're quick to reply again.
"i meant sexually, love." he laughs, somewhat fondly.
was it that obvious that you're a virgin? your cheeks feel hot, and you now wish to exit the page. but by doing that, you'll just prove him right. he'll make fun of you too, just like he did to those friends. you sigh. he doesn't know who you are, so it doesn't matter. you'll be honest, and maybe he'll give you a solution.
using hands isn't that boring
"ever tried a toy? or a person?"
tried a person. got disappointed.
"ah, what a shame. let me guess, gave you blisters from rubbing?"
oh just how did you know?
"poor thing," he coos, "if you had come to the right person, i would've given you just what you need."
the words come out raspy, and there's a sudden change on his face. you wonder if you said anything wrong. if he was thinking about banning you. but instead, a notification pops up in the corner of your screen.
wooyoung has sent you a message request!
oh.
oh.
"anyways, let's move on. am i in a hotel? ah, no. i recently moved houses, this will be my new filming room now. not as special as the previous one, but i need time to decorate it."
he keeps talking, eyes glancing at his phone every now and then, as if expecting you to answer right away. you are shaking, your head feels dizzy, and you find it hard to swallow. was he going to tell you privately to fuck off of his site? how embarrassing that would be. you wouldn't ever recover.
wooyoung has sent you a message request!
two of them now, yet you're still debating whether or not to exit and delete your browsing history. it won't hurt to look. you don't have to reply. you can just take a peek, leave him on read, and fuck out of there. it's not like he will see you on the street tomorrow. he could be on a whole different continent, and yet, he could be five houses away from you. either way, you're feeling vulnerable. those messages are either humiliation, or something entirely different. both of those make you feel uneasy.
then again, this is the only thing that sparked something inside you in these few months of feeling burnt out from reading all that erotica. the only difference is, this is happening. really happening. a whole man is in your chat, while he has an ongoing sex stream with more than five thousand people watching and commenting. and so when you say fuck it, you mean it.
wooyoung: ever tried an innocent soft little pillow?
wooyoung: guaranteed, feels better than a horny teenage boy.
your breathing is shallow, and you fear that you might collapse. his next message contains a phone number, and then, you watch him drop the phone on his bed. his focus is now on the camera, and the way his eyes stare into the lens, makes you feel as if they're searching for you. deciding to further test the waters, and see if he is just trying to have a little fun, or if he really has taken an ounce of interest in an inexperienced watcher, you send a text back.
he stops mid sentence, glancing at his phone. he fails to hide a smirk, and you're not sure whether it is the one of amusement or mocking.
am I, a boring old virgin, good enough for a pillow?
being a virgin doesn't mean you're all that innocent. quite the opposite, in your friend group, you are the one who leaves them all shocked when you speak of your desires. yet, who guarantees that this guy can accomplish what you want? they all want to "rock your world", show you how "good" it can be, until the make-out session is over and they come in their pants from simple dry humping. and you? who cares about if you came. your job is done the moment they come to their senses, and you are left to your growing disappointment in young men your age again.
wooyoung: does the boring old virgin know how to use one? perhaps some assistance is needed?
you swallow. you've never used anything other than your hand before. for someone with such a creative mind, you were quite a bore when it comes to pleasing yourself. you were used to your own touch, and you desperately needed someone else to fill the spot.
you glance at the screen. he is now holding something in his hand. it's clear, and long, and you're not sure if you've seen that before. your mind doesn't get enough time to form a thought, because he sticks two fingers in his mouth. he swirls the tongue around them, coating them until they're shimmering like the rings. sensually slow, he takes them out, making sure to give the camera a dreamy gaze. he turns the gadget towards the camera, and just when you figure out what it is, he brings his wet fingers to the hole in the toy. he circles the entrance, causing your tights to squeeze. you are so mesmerized by the way he slowly inserts his fingers into the toy, that you don't realize you are almost panting.
"need to prepare her for me."  he says, giving it a few slow pumps.
you can almost feel his fingers on your cunt, he is just that good at this. each pump of his fingers sends a wave of butterflies straight to your abdomen. it's so painful, to be horny on your period. otherwise you would've came twice by now.
"think I've prepared her enough?"
comments are flooded with positive feedback, and the young man smirks. he readjusts the camera, and sits with his back against the bed frame. he wears short sweatpants, perfectly showing off his not so humble size. he takes his sweet time to undo the knot on them, driving the watchers (including you) insane. he laughs at the comments, and decides it's enough teasing.
"for all the virgins here tonight," he says, then glances at his phone.
finally, he pulls his sweats down. his cock find its place in his hand, not allowing you to take a better look. wooyoung gives himself a few slow strokes, head falling against the headboard as he does so. he hums, licking his fingers and pressing them against his cock. you have stopped breathing. his gaze is fixed on the lens, eyelids half closed, and breathing shallow. your eyes watch his movements, carefully documenting and engraving them in your brain so you can replay them for the next few weeks. he takes the toy, sliding it on his cock. your mouth drops when you see the absolute relief on his face, followed by an eyeroll and a deep moan. you figure that the toy serves him as a fake pussy. why a fake one, when he can have anyone he likes? his watchers must get jealous. you would be too, if you saw someone so hot that gives you such attention fuck someone else.
a few strokes in, and he is already bucking his hips upwards and moaning. wet noises travel to your ears, paired with multiple curses and sighs. suddenly, he sits up, grabbing two pillows from behind his back. he places a pillow on the mattress, the toy, then another pillow on top of all that. you almost gasp when you see him spit on his fingers, rubbing his cock, then slowly insert it into the toy. he grabs the pillows, then plunges his hips into it. he groans, and stays inside for a moment. then, he starts off with slow thrusts.
you've read so much about rough sex, that you didn't even think about the sensual side of it. how good it must be to savour every caress, every lick and every stroke. to actually take your time, like he is taking it with a simple toy. to be at his mercy for hours, what you'd give. helpless, deprived of senses, only him and you. you feel your heartbeat slow down as he stares into the lens, hips moving with such pace that has your stomach almost exploding.
overwhelmed by the situation unfolding in front of you, you shut your laptop down. you see your face on the black screen; cheeks puffed, pupils dilated, and mouth dry. fuck, what was that? did you just watch live porn? and did you interact with the person doing it? you check the time, and with a loud groan, you place the laptop on the floor and roll over. you have so little time to get some quality sleep, yet you're wide awake. your studying is nowhere near done, and you just know that a prayer won't save you tomorrow. from the exam, nor from the cramps.
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surprisingly, you passed the exam. everything you've read last night managed to stick to your brain, despite the crazy situation that had interrupted you. you have already forgotten about it. when you woke up, it all seemed like a part of your dream. a very real dream. today, you didn't have time to think about it. your hair is a greasy mess, and an oversized hoodie hangs from your shoulders, covering your bloated stomach. you've dreamed about a cup of your favorite pink beverage all morning, and when the clock finally showed a sweet number four, you were the first one to run out of the building. your phone lays forgotten at the bottom of your backpack, mind too cluttered with the upcoming projects and cramps.
the coffee shop isn't as busy for a monday morning, and the timing is just right. you cannot stand anymore, so when you get next in line, you are relieved. you take a good look at the menu above the counter, happy that you've made it through such a tough morning.
"good day, how can i help you?"
your smile fades as quick as it arrives. you feel like all the blood in your body has pooled down in your feet, making it hard to move.
"oh, do you need to sit down? you look very..." the voice pauses, and you can feel an intense gaze on your face, before he continues "...pale."
you drop your gaze, slowly, feeling like the person is going to catch on if you do it in normal pace. right in front of you, stands the man who you watched fuck a pillow last night. he is very much real, not a fruit of your imagination combined with exhaust. he smiles sweetly, showing you towards a chair. you don't move. instead, you blink, and let your mouth run.
"i'll have the strawberry mocha please."
he scrunches his eyebrows, but begins to tap on his screen anyway.
"whipp-?"
"with whipped cream, thanks. just, uh, extra syrup. and pearl sprinkles."
he raises an eyebrow, looking at you suspiciously. you can't tell if it's because of your relation to his odd interaction last night, or simply because you are acting weird.
"that'll be-"
you interrupt again, pressing your credit card to the gadget near the cash register, eyes not leaving the wooden surface. with behaviour like this, he will soon figure out why you are acting this way. you must stop, before you embarrass yourself more.
"name?"
"anna," you blurt out, just in case.
"right," you think you hear him scoff, and if it weren't for your brain slowing down with each second, you would've asked what's so funny.
once he types in everything he needs, he points towards an empty section, gesturing you to take a seat. sitting on that chair has never been more uncomfortable for you. you feel like you sat on thorns, and no matter how you adjust, you are just making annoying creaking noises.
you glance at the man behind the counter. a lump forms in your throat as your eyes scan his hand movements. he is invested in the shaker, fingers skillfully moving it in the air. your concentration gets stolen by his face, loose strands falling on it eyes focused on the drink, and eyebrows scrunched. even if he was a aware of you staring, (you doubt he didn't notice), he doesn't spare you a glance. he pours the drink into the iced cup, spilling a little on his fingers and on the counter. you follow his hand, which takes a straw and drops it into the cup, and then moves towards his mouth. your breath stops in your throat, and your eyes almost drop on the floor.
he sticks the two wet fingers in his mouth, slowly, and looks up right at you. he catches you red handed, or better said, red cheeked. you're flustered by his hot, unprofessional, but hot move. and as if that wasn't enough, he has the audacity to maintain eyecontact as he brings you your beverage, a slight smirk dancing on his lips.
"your drink, anna."
"thank you, woo-" you freeze.
idiot. fucking idiot.
"ah, you managed to read my name tag."
he saves you, perhaps unknowingly. the amount of attention that his hands are gaining from you should be concerning, yet you still can't stop admiring those strangely attractive veins peeking from under his rolled up sleeve, going all the way to the fingers which are fixing the name tag.
"wooyoung, your shift ended ten minutes ago!" the voice behind the counter calls.
"oops." he snickers, then makes his way towards the counter, allowing you to take a look at his back too.
the thin white shirt is a little tight on his body, just enough to show off quite a few lines on his back. funnily enough, even though you've seen him naked, something about those clothes giving you a teaser is much more of a button pusher for you. the anticipation and buildup were always more interesting to you than the actual thing they lead to.
you laugh at yourself. as if any of that is going to happen to you any time soon. deciding you've spent enough time out of your comfy apartment today, you decide to put a lid on your coffee and leave the shop. at the door, someone tries to get out before you, but once they realize it's a bit tight for both, two hands gently find their way on your waist. a strong scent of jasmine washes over your senses, warm and firm body pressed against your back.
"oh, watch it, love."
and with that, you stand on the entrance, watching the familiar man run off to his car, the barista apron resting over his shoulder.
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wooyoung: disconnected mid show?
wooyoung: was it too overwhelming for your first time?
wooyoung: shame, i put my all into that orgasm, only to see you disconnected long ago
you are rolling in your bed, listening to the messages that are being read out loud by your very best friend. disbelief evident in his voice, he reads, over and over. you haven't yet replied, and having an actual encounter with him today didn't make it easier for you to do so.
"he's, like, a hundred percent real?"
"he very much is."
"are you sure? because ai is getting very scary these days-"
"yunho." you sit up, face inches away from him. "i stood this close to him."
the tips of his ears turn red, and you manage to catch a single glance he sends towards your lips. you ignore it, trying to convince yourself that if you do not notice, it will not happen. his behaviour will stop.
"he is very much real."
"o-okay," he stutters, turning his head sideways as to avoid being caught staring again, "so what now?"
"i don't know. what is there to do? he's just some porn guy, and i was just an accidental watcher. nothing is going to happen."
"and-"
your phone pings, as if knowing what yunho was about to ask.
"-the messages?"
"i'll just..." you stall, glancing at the phone and trying to see the notification, "...delete it all."
the man in front of you scoffs, believing in your words as much as you. he gets off your bed, picking up his jacket along the way.
"i'll see you in class tomorrow."
you only nod, feeling guilt pooling up at the bottom of your stomach. yet, as soon as you hear the door shut, you grab your phone. indeed, messages from wooyoung are taking up your phone screen.
wooyoung: out of curiosity, you didn't happen to try the pillow thing?
wooyoung: need to borrow mine?
you bite your lip, and your eyes fall on the pile of pillows yunho used to make himself comfortable.
i haven't tried it. and no, i have four of them.
wooyoung: shame. bet they'd love to be suffocated between your legs.
you choke on your spit, eyes skimming over the message multiple times.
that one of your fetishes? being suffocated with female tights?
wooyoung: you have no idea.
a few minutes pass,and you are thinking of various replies to send to him. do you keep talking to him? do you start flirting? is this considered flirting? if yes, are you doing a good job? a few more minutes pass before your phone dings again, wooyoung interrupting your thinking process.
wooyoung: well, i see that you're extremely disinterested in my tries of communication, so i shall just leave you be. hope my actions and i weren't overwhelming for you. if that's the case, my sincere apologies. you're always welcome to my lives though.
wooyoung: oh, and good luck studying!
"no, no," you whisper, seeing the online tag under his name disappear. your lack of communication with actual confident men and your awkwardness in general made him back off. it all felt too real to be true, but it was real. and you let it slip away. your only chance at gaining experience and living out your fantasies.
i'm not disinterested!
shit, you shouldn't have sent that exclamation mark. he will think you are desperate now. he doesn't reply, nor does the tag under his name reappear. you wait, minutes, half an hour, just rolling on the bed and switching between apps, trying to see if he at least went online. maybe he only read it from his notifications, and that wasn't enough to make him come back. you pick up the last few ounces of desperation you have left, and grab a pillow. you sit on it, crushing it between your legs, and pull your oversized hoodie just enough to cover your bottom and expose your thighs. you have discarded the pants the moment you entered the house, already used to walking around in yunho's old comfy boxers. you snap a picture, once, then twice, until you are satisfied with the angle and all the details that he may not even notice; like your chipped nail polish or the messy notes from yunho's studying.
instantly, wooyoung comes back online. he begins typing, then stops. he types again, and stops once more. you are biting your nails, regretting already. now that he knows how desperate you are, he will lose interest in you. you would too if you were him. you zoom into the picture, trying to figure out if anything is wrong with it.
wooyoung saved the picture in the chat!
oh.
wooyoung: fuck, that's
wooyoung: wow
wooyoung: those are the smoothest and softest thighs i've ever seen in my life
wooyoung: you know when you look at something and you know the texture of it? i bet i could just sink between them just like that pillow
wooyoung: could you ride that for me, angel?
the nickname sends arrows to your core, and you gulp. he knows his way with words, and you are so here for it. you can feel yourself dripping, and not from what you're supposed to drip from. your horny levels hit the sky on your period, and oh, how convenient that all of this is happening on the second day of it. he doesn't have to know, you could keep him hooked, until your period is done. but then what? what guarantees that he will not lose interest once he has a little fun with you with all the dirty talk?
your hands work against your brain, and soon enough, you are grinding on the soft material, one hand holding the phone and the other one covering your mouth so that no noises come out of it. if it feels good with so many layers on you, how good can it feel with your bare clit rubbing against it?
wooyoung: atta girl
wooyoung: feel good?
you only moan at the praise he delivers you, hips speeding up the pace.
yes, you manage to quickly type in.
wooyoung: can you type and work it? is it hard for my good girl to multitask?
you set the phone aside, focusing entirely on the object between your legs. you roll your hips, dedicated to chasing the sweet pleasure that has abandoned you for so long. at the memory of his skilled hips last night, the orgasm washes over you so quickly. his choice of words significantly sped up the process, and you aren't to complain. you take your time to calm your breathing, before taking the phone in your hands again. it was new, and different, but most importantly, fucking good.
the euphoria doesn't last long, the look of horror replacing the one of pure bliss on your face. right under wooyoung's message stood yours.
voice message sent.
it is you shamelessly whimpering and grunting, mere four seconds of it, yet enough to make wooyoung save it in the chat.
wooyoung: is it christmas already?
wooyoung: i keep getting present after present. what did i do to deserve it?
wooyoung: i better go fix the problem you've created.
wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.
the picture is dark, but there is just enough lighting for you to see his defined v-line and the bulge in his sweatpants. you bite the inside of your cheek, suppressing a smile. you made someone horny. not just anyone, but wooyoung, a porn creator. he has surely seen lots of things, how come a fully clothed picture and a four second audio could get him in the mood?
you have saved the picture in the chat!
in the next few days, you ask yunho to pick up the beverage from the coffee shop while you grab something to eat. he is happy that you started including breakfast in your day, and isn't yet aware that you are only avoiding the man he also knew about. perhaps wooyoung worked different shifts, and they didn't have an encounter yet? it's a bit cruel towards yunho, but you can't make yourself go in there. not until you've grown some dignity.
today, yunho isn't here. he has only answered to your message, saying that he has a flu, and that he will be resting for a day or two. which leaves you to getting the coffee on your own. you run from the rain, your umbrella broken and swimming away somewhere down the road. you would've picked it up and threw it away, really, if that lighting wasn't so close to you and you started running for your life. you are soaked, the hoodie stuck to your skin and the shorts uncomfortable and heavy. you hurriedly enter the coffee shop and exhale, the warmth of the place caressing your cold cheeks. you notice the place is empty, and the chairs are neatly tucked under the tables. the surfaces have been freshly wiped, and no menus or decorations were on them.
you approach the counter, ready to grab your beverage and leave before you make a bigger mess. nobody is there, the syrups and coffee cans are neatly placed on the shelves, not a drop of water visible on the counters. your eyes notice a little board, with pink letters on it.
due to sudden illness of two out of three workers, we are forced to work short hours this week. thank you for understanding!
underneath, you see that they work until four in the afternoon. you check the time, and upon noticing that it is just two minutes before four, you sigh. you turn around, ready to leave and rid the poor worker of trouble after they already prepared the place for closing.
"oh, i'm terribly sorry, i didn't notice you!"
the voice makes your blood run cold, and once again, you find yourself frozen in spot. only this time, you are all alone with him. no people surrounding you. just him, you, and the crazy weather outside.
"please, feel free to order. you have a minute and a half to place it!"
you turn around, eyes locking with brown ones. he is smiling sweetly, pointing towards the menu above his head.
"i don't want to bother you. you've cleaned the whole place and-" your eyes drop on the see through shirt hugging his body "-you've already taken your apron off."
"luckily, my boss is sick too so she can't give me crap about it. i can make your drink without it."
you make your way towards the counter again, eyes skimming over the menu, knowing damn well what you're going to order. you just have to buy yourself time so you can calm down. the scent of jasmine is taking over your senses, creeping into your mind and bringing back memories you wish so hard to forget so you can move on with your life. he is tugging you into the void, and you have nothing to get you out of there. you haven't heard from him since the day you rode the pillow for him, and you didn't have time to watch any of his lives.
"well, then. i'll have a strawberry mocha."
"ah, so it's your usual then."
"yes. extra syrup. and the pearl sprinkles, please."
"and whipped cream, yes", he types in the order, then looks behind. "you know, we have some strawberry cupcakes that didn't sell today due to the weather. would you like one? on the house!"
you hesitate, not wanting to waste his time. he could be home by now, doing something important. like filming himself. or texting you after you've left him on seen. or better said, saved.
"i really don't want to waste your time."
"you're not wasting my time, trust me. besides, i'd rather stay here a little more until my phone finishes charging. i don't want to get stuck in that weather outside with no battery."
he sees you hesitate and eye up the pink pastries, desire obvious in your eyes. he chuckles, then brings the whole tray on the counter.
"tell you what," he grabs the items needed for your beverage, not breaking eye contact with you, "i'll make us two strawberry mochas, and we'll eat those cupcakes so they don't get wasted until the weather calms down. sound good?"
you gulp. the look on your face is a complete opposite of him, as well as your body language. he is relaxed, beaming with confidence, and has a smile on his lips. meanwhile, you are stiff, your face is blank, maybe even scared at the fact that you're gonna be alone with the man who made you cum without touching you. but when thunder echoes through the place, you agree.
it doesn't take him long to make them and bring them to your booth in the corner of the shop. the smell of strawberries is the only thing keeping you sane at the moment. he sits across from you, shirt half unbuttoned, as if it's the warmest day of the spring outside. he doesn't have a care in the world. he silently enjoys the cupcake, occasionally glancing at you. you are slow with yours, careful not to stain your clothes with the pink icing.
"want to try?"
you look over at him. he brings his glass closer towards you, and aligns the straw with your lips.
"isn't it the same?"
"well, no." he laughs awkwardly. "try it, trust me."
you try taking the glass from him, but he is persistent in holding it for you. you wrap your lips around the straw, eyes locked with his dark ones.
"atta girl." he hums.
you swear you could orgasm right there on the spot. you pull at the liquid, cheeks hollowing and creating a perfect scene for him. he is dead serious, the smirks and chuckles long left behind the counter. the moment your tongue tastes alcohol, you push the drink away from you, creamy liquid dripping from your lips.
"fuck, is that whiskey?"
you wipe your top off with your sleeve, not yet realizing wooyoung's intense gaze on your lips.
"yes." he replies, as if it's the most normal thing in the world.
"god, why?" you finally lick the cream off your lips, ridding wooyoung of more fantasies forming in his head.
"it's good. why, don't like alcohol?"
you never really did. sure, you drank some tequilas, and a little gin of course, but not to the point to get drunk or actually go for a full round or two.
"i'm actually quite a virgin when it comes to alcohol."
the words are left hanging in the air, silence wrapping you both up. one might think that you knew exactly what you were doing with the choice of words, but you were plain dense. and wooyoung was here for it. he was whipped for all the innocent sides you were unknowingly showing him, but lord forbid he tells you anything. otherwise, you might stop talking at all.
"you can come over for classes if you want..." he brings the glass back in front of him, a smirk dancing on his lips, "...anna."
"yeah, i don't want any alcohol after my real classes, thank you."
the conversation stops, the only sound being quiet chewing and the rain pouring. wooyoung takes his time to think, and so do you.
"that yunho guy-"
"what do you do in your free time-"
you start at the same time. yunho? how does he know his name?
"you go first," you offer, unwrapping another cupcake.
"that yunho guy, he orders a single strawberry mocha with extra syrup and pearl sprinkles every day when you don't come. whipped cream too, of course. for you, assuming?"
you nod, poking those same sprinkles with your straw. yunho has been a little more absent in your life since this whole thing has started, and you feel bad to admit that you didn't really miss him. you weren't using him for coffee or homework, of course. you still like to occasionally chat with him, just not like before. especially since his feelings are coming more to the surface.
"yes, for me."
wooyoung hums, not asking further questions.
"so uh, wooyoung, right? you're new here?" you opt for a different question, seeing that he didn't remind you to finish the previous one.
"jung wooyoung, yes. i moved from los angeles recently, didn't find my luck there."
"ah, what do you do?"
"porn."
and just like that, the conversation stops. at least from your side. your head hangs low over your paper cup, fingers now playing with the cupcake wrap as you feel his gaze on you.
"are we going to act like you don't know what that is?"
"i know what it is," you stutter, fingers ripping the wrap apart and playing with bits from nervousness, "i just don't quite, you know, fit in that area."
"you sure fit in that night."
you choke on your spit, eyes shooting up to look at him. his elbow rests on the desk, supporting his head, while his other one plays with the empty cup. his finger grazes the corners, slowly circling it, as if trying to help you remember that night and the way the did it to the toy. your mouth goes dry, and you feel at his complete mercy.
"how-" you clear your throat, the roughness of it a dead giveaway that he caught you, "-how did you, uh, know?"
"you're telling me you saw nothing wrong with entering the coffee shop with that hoodie on, knowing full well i work here?"
you look down at the hoodie you're wearing. how fucking ironic, that it's the same hoodie you posed in for him. you really are that dense.
"i should get going."
"i can drive you home. you're not thinking of walking in this weather?"
him and you? in such a small space? for such a long time? what if you blurt out more stupid things, as if you haven't embarrassed yourself enough today? you wouldn't blame him if he left you on the side of the road.
the train of thoughts is interrupted by your name rolling off his lips so sweetly, dripping milk and honey. your actual name, not the fake one you gave him.
"yes?"
"i'm not camboy wooyoung now. i'm just wooyoung, your friendly barista. and when i say i can and want to drive you home, i mean it. no funny business. the last thing i want to do is make a loyal costumer uncomfortable."
it doesn't take long for him to clean up the table and grab his phone from the charging station. you patiently wait by the door, ears and cheeks warm from the unfamiliar situation you've found yourself in. you follow his commands, such as coming behind the counter and slipping through the staff door so that the cameras don't catch you. you squeeze into the pantry, waiting for him to lock the doors one by one.
"so, that yunho guy didn't take your virginity yet?" he blurts out, as if it is the most normal question he could ask.
"what?"
"well," he turns around, facing you, "he is your boyfriend after all, isn't he?"
"that's not quite- oh-" you are pressed into the corner, with wooyoung blocking the way out. he puts his hands on the wall, trapping you between his arms and forcing you to look at him.
"does your boyfriend know that you watch filth and film yourself for another man?"
"he isn't-"
"does he know that his innocent little girlfriend is alone with that same man inside an empty coffee shop, away from everyone?"
you fail to answer, instead opting for silence. your eyes fall on his exposed chest, fingers yearning to touch. you feel a hand under your chin, gently lifting your head up so that you can look at him again. you see pure desire in his eyes, and now you know exactly what the authors mean when they say that his eyes darkened with lust. you are witnessing it first hand, and now that you are finally here, you are not acting the way you did in your mind.
he brings his face close to yours, his loose hair strands tickling your cheeks. his breathing is shallow, much like yours, and when he slowly presses his lips against yours, you breathing stops completely. he holds your chin in his hand, thumb gently rubbing your cheek, while his other hand finds its place on your hip. he pulls your body into his, and ever so gently bites down on your bottom lip.
your first normal kiss ever. with the man you watched masturbate on a crucial studying night. he pulls away, just enough to move your hair out of the way.
"am i making you uncomfortable?" he asks, concern taking over his features.
"no," you whisper, not trusting your voice.
"you sure?"
"please keep kissing me." you look up at him, and wooyoung swears that he has never seen such big pleading eyes in his entire life. just how can he deny you such a thing, when you asked him so sweetly and innocently?
wooyoung loses control, and lets his heart take over. his hands grab your waist, picking you up and seating you on a nearby surface, knocking some cups and cutlery over in the process. his lips are pressed against yours again, moving slowly until you get used to it. your hands hesitantly wrap around his neck, fingers playing with the hair on it. wooyoung exhales into your lips, absolutely whipped for your little gestures.
you are soaking wet. you hope he doesn't feel it, considering he has your legs wrapped around his waist and your cunt pressed against his firm torso. with each kiss he so generously delivers you, a new batch of butterflies gets released in your stomach, making you feel all giggly and excited. he smells absolutely heavenly, and the way his tongue is grazing your lips is driving you mad. his fingers press into your thigh, feeling the flesh and lightly squeezing it. so he really does have a thigh fetish.
you whine when he pulls away from you, only to attach his lips to your neck. he drags his tongue down the side of your neck, to your collarbone. his hands sneak under your hoodie, lingering on your bare skin for a moment. you realize he is waiting for a sign to keep going, so you help him raise your hoodie right under your chest.
"should i stop?"
you didn't quite picture him as a man who would ask for consent multiple times. but then again, he is a man. not a boy. and just like he said: right now, he isn't camboy wooyoung. he is your friendly barista wooyoung. a particularly touchy friendly barista wooyoung. not that you're complaining.
"angel?"
absolutely lost in the way he is looking at you, you fail to answer. you feel so small in his arms, and so inexperienced when it comes to simple kissing. god, what if he wants something more right away?
"i need to know you're comfortable. i won't do anything if-"
you stop him by taking his hand and placing it on your breast. he gulps, gently squeezing the soft flesh. why does he seem so nervous? doesn't he fuck multiple people in a span of a month?
he rubs your tense buds, sending little shockwaves to your core. as soon as you lift the hoodie to your collarbones, wooyoung is quick to take your bud into his mouth. he teases with the tip of his tongue, making you twitch and yelp in his grip. you aren't used to this type of pleasure. it's new, and intensive. you love it.
his other hand keeps up the pace his tongue has set, rubbing slow circles on the sensitive buds. you struggle with breathing, and your hands are reaching out to grab anything; the counter, his shoulders, his hair, the counter again, and so on. your head falls back, and the feeling of pure bliss pools in your stomach. you feel like you could orgasm any moment, yet it never happens. wooyoung switches between each bud, treating them both equally. a particularly breathy moan leaves your mouth, making wooyoung hum. he is pleased with the way you're responding to him, so jumpy and whiny while he feasts on your body.
when he pulls away, you see a string of saliva connecting his lips with your breast. you moan at the sight, feeling adrenaline running through your veins and waiting to explode somewhere in your body. wooyoung drops down on his knees, fingers hooked in the elastic band of your shorts.
"if i don't get crushed between your thighs right now, i don't think i'll live to see another day."
even from that position, he is emitting insane dominant energy, and you are just a marionette in his hands.
"please."
you raise your hips just enough to help him pull the shorts down, along with the panties. you are thankful that they are the new ones you had discovered this morning since buying them a month ago. though, they were ruined with your arousal anyway and wooyoung probably couldn't care less. but instead of tossing them aside, he raises them in front of his eyes, admiring them.
"that's so fucking adorable."
they are plain pastel panties, with a small row of lace on the top of it. you figure he is used to strings and thongs, and how new a normal set of panties must seem to him. wooyoung folds the panties, and stuffs them in his pocket. too taken aback by his action, you do not have time to react when he places your legs over his shoulders.
"you don't have to cum. i just want to show you how good it can be."
you mean you want to leave me yearning for your touch as if i am not desperate enough?
"is that alright? can i lick you until you pass out?"
he knows exactly which words drive you insane. as if he was living in your head since you discovered the first young adult fantasy book. you nod, then breathe in. the sudden lighting outside makes you aware of where you are. you are about to have your cunt devoured by none other than the new barista everyone around you is crushing on, in one of the staff rooms. soft café music is heard in the distance now that the rain has calmed down, and it is only adding up to the rather odd, but once in a lifetime situation you are in.
a flat, wet muscle presses against your folds, softly licking up your arousal and stopping at your clit. you try to close your legs at the new feeling of pleasure, but wooyoung is quick to grab your thighs and keep them apart just enough so he can get you used to the feeling. your legs shake as the tip of his tongue massages the tip of your clit, pure pleasure taking over your body and completely shutting your brain off. you are a whining mess, shaking in his arms, pulling at his hair, and whatnot. his eyes never leave your face, memorizing every eyebrow scrunch, every eyeroll, every moan and every hand movement. he is entirely mesmerized by your existence. he has never seen anyone let their guard down like this and put themselves at his complete mercy.
he switches between techniques, not yet allowing you to work up your orgasm. he figures you like circles with the tip of his tongue best, they have you being more vocal and squirmy in his hold. wooyoung then snakes his hands under your bottom, gently lifting your lower body so that your head and shoulders lay comfortably on the wooden surface. your hips are in the air, and your legs hang off his shoulders. you are confused by the position he has you in, until he dives into your cunt once more. you moan, fingers reaching to pull at his soft hair. this time he doesn't separate your thighs, but instead presses his face further into your arousal and squishes your flesh against his cheeks, licking every drop you have to offer him.
"wooyoung-" you whine, hips subconsciously grinding against his face.
"good, good girl." he hums, lips closing around your bud and sucking on it.
you clench, body tensing up upon feeling the orgasm approaching.
"fuck- fuck-" you whine, hands gripping the shelves above your head.
wooyoung slows his movements to the max, carefully sliding his tongue up and down your clit, driving you insane with the orgasm delay. you want to cum so bad, but everything feels too much, you are sweating so bad, and the position you are in is making you more vulnerable and sensitive.
"please, please, please, pretty please" you beg, voice already betraying you and cracking at the end.
wooyoung groans against your cunt, then moves away. you gasp with surprise. all the pleasure leaves your body, and you are now laying on the surface again. you support yourself on your elbows, enough to look at him and ask just why he stopped.
"prettiest cunt i've ever seen in my life." he caresses your skin above it.
"why-" you breathe out, "- why did you stop? i was so, so close-"
"i had to, angel. i don't want you cumming in a pantry on an uncomfortable surface."
you watch him lick his lips, disbelief evident on your face. he chuckles, picking your shorts up from the floor.
"panties?"
"i'll get you new ones."
were the panties really that interesting to him? wooyoung reaches for something above your head, pressing his lips on your forehead before grabbing paper towels. you are sensitive to his touch, feeling overstimulated and irritated even though you didn't orgasm. he patiently wipes you, then pulls your shorts up, not forgetting to caress your thighs along the way.
"come here." he instructs.
you sit up, feet swinging from the counter. the man in front of you pulls you in for a kiss, this time a short one.
"you did very good. i hope you get your real orgasm somewhere comfy."
he hopes? was this a farewell? he had his little fun with you, and now he is no longer interested?
"come on, the weather is calmer now. i'll still drive you home though."
and just like that, he proceeds outside, leaving you with thoughts for a few moments. you feel a little humiliated, and very vulnerable and exposed. still, you follow him outside, and get into his car. it is a neat car, that you notice. it smells like an ocean breeze, and he has a camera above his steering wheel.
"not for porn," he interrupts your thoughs.
you have forgotten about that side of him. in the moment, it seemed like he was just a normal guy who hooked up with you because he thinks you are cute. in reality, he is probably bored of all those skilled partners and wants something new, so he used you as a little project. you feel hurt, tears gathering in the corner of your eyes as you look out the window. you haven't spared him a single glance, scared that he might be pitiful towards you. that's the last thing you need.
"right, then left?" he asks, steering the wheel with one hand.
"yeah."
it doesn't take long before the car stops in front of a familiar building. you don't see yunho's car, and just then remember that he is sick and resting at home. wooyoung has clouded your mind so much that you don't have any other thoughts, only ones about him.
"thank you for sharing the cupcakes with me." he winks, then unlocks the door.
you aren't ready to say goodbye just yet. if you leave the car, will everything be back the way it was? him acting like he doesn't know you, and vice versa? are you supposed to go in there and order your strawberry mocha from him like it doesn't associate you with today's event?
"wooyoung?"
"yes, angel?"
you play with your fingers in your lap, deciding which words would be the best to make him stay in your life just a little longer.
"can you teach me?"
"teach you?"
"yes. you are so experienced, and i am just a dumb virgin with a big imagination."
he stops to think. he bites the inside of his cheek, and you mimic him.
"i'd destroy you."
you clench around nothing, hearing his raspy voice say such words to you. you know he means them, you saw him mean them. but you are up for it. anything, just to get another taste of him.
"i don't mind."
he sighs, smile still dancing on his lips. "just what are you?"
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since the day you had your first orgasm denial, you have heard from him only once, and only because you sent the message first.
i'm not seeing those panties again, right?
wooyoung: nope.
okay
okay? okay??? you could at least put some effort into flirting. you are only pushing him away, instead of inching towards another meeting, this one preferably ending with an orgasm. the notifications about his lives were now regulars on your phone screen, and though you never quite watched them, you like to think he does it for you. slight jealousy has appeared, and you have to stop it before it spreads. but after all, you are the one that has gained his attention.
you decide to visit yunho. he has been sick for quite some time, and has been rarely answering your messages. you have prepared him his favourite soup, and bought his favorite chocolate bar.
"yunnie, you're alive!"
you jump into his arms, forgetting that he might still be weak from being sick. but he catches you effortlessly, a fond smile on his lips as he keeps your body close to him.
"feeling better?"
"almost." he replies, gently setting you down on the floor. "how have you been?"
"bored, honestly. i miss gossiping with you and getting yelled at by other students. oh, turns out mark did cheat on jenna!"
"knew it."
yunho makes his way to the kitchen to grab you a drink and put away the food you brought him, and you can't help but notice how buff he has gotten since the last time you saw him. he was probably well built before too, but you've never seen that man in anything other than oversized t-shirts and hoodies. right now, he is wearing one of those compressive exercise sleeveless tops, every bump and curve visible on his toned body. you notice how big his arms are, and just how tall he is.
you feel familiar warmth between your legs, and you have to sit down to stop any funny business. he is speaking, but all you can do is stare at the way his hands are handling the drinks. his hands are much bigger in comparison to wooyoung, and his physique overall is making you melt right there on his couch.
"so? sound good?"
you look up, pupils dilated and cheeks warm and red. he is confused by your sudden change in expression, before he realizes that you weren't even listening. he sighs, giving up on the weekend trip proposal.
"what is it with you?" the man hands you a glass of apple juice, along with a granola bar he knows you love to steal from his cupboard.
"nothing, why?" you reply too quickly.
he laughs, mixed confusion and amusement. he sits next to you, leaving a little space in between. the way he drops his head back on the backrest and manspreads isn't helping your situation. wooyoung has opened a door that cannot be closed anymore.
fuck, wooyoung.
"you know, i thought i was gonna die. my headache was so bad i heard thumping inside it."
"does it hurt now?"
"not really, no. but i do think i still have a little fever. can you check?"
you lean over on your knees, fingers gently moving his hair out of the way. upon reaching over for the thermometer from the coffee table, you slip between the couch cushions, making yunho jolt and grab your waist. you have to close your eyes for a moment, sensory overload getting the worst of you. your clothes suddenly feel so tight and itchy, his breathing is loud and right there in your ears, and his hands are burning on your skin over the fabric of your top.
"watch it, little one," he says.
you know he means the nickname as a sign of fondness towards you, but in the situation where you're acting like an animal in heat, it is doing wonders to you. knowing that he is big, much bigger than you, and calling you that is making your stomach boil.
you want to make a move. no matter how wrong it would be. you want to lean in and kiss him, make him feel you up and down, make him touch you right here on the couch, where you cuddled and watched movies since knowing each other.
"why are you looking at me like that?" his voice is suddenly raspy.
"like what?" you whisper, afraid of your infamous cracking tone.
"like you want to fuck me."
not far from truth. not exactly fuck, rather just have a little fun to get some heat out of you. his hands never leave your waist, instead pulling your body into his lap. you've been in this position many times, mainly being tickled and begging for mercy. now? you're ready to beg for his tongue on you.
"i-"
a familiar ringtone interrupts you, and you feel him tense up underneath.
"pick it up." he says, lazily looking at you through half closed eyelids.
"uh, yes," you stutter, reaching towards the table to grab your phone.
you almost faint seeing the name on your screen. you don't want to pick up. not now. any other time, yes. but right now? not quite convenient.
"go on, answer it." yunho encourages, not knowing the consequences of his action.
but you do it anyway. what is there to lose? lose yunho, gain wooyoung. and vice versa. how fucking evil of you. acting like a bitch in heat, listening to your pussy instead of your morals.
"yes?" you answer, breath hitching when yunho starts caressing your sides.
"hi, angel."
yunho's touching stops. he is now focused on the male voice coming from your phone, the name of the contact not visible from your hair.
"let me see you tonight? i'll take you out for a ride and a dinner."
"tonight?"
"yes. unless you have plans? i just got my motorcycle back from the auto mechanic, thought i'd show you there's thrilling stuff other than an orgasm denial in a public space."
yunho removes his hands completely from you, but lets you sit on his lap. you witness his face morph from flirty to mixed anger and disappointment, though he is trying very hard to hide it. the red tips of his ears are a dead giveaway, and you wish you could feel guilty.
"i have no plans. the ride sounds nice."
"good girl. i'll pick you up same place i dropped you off the other day, six o'clock?"
"sound good."
"good. i'll see you in around two hours then?"
"yes."
"chatty as usual, i see. i'll get you to talk tonight, no worries."
and with that, he hangs up. it is only then that yunho sits you on the couch next to him, while he stands up. you are numb to his reaction, excitement boiling in your veins in anticipation for tonight.
"do you enjoy hurting me?"
he shoots the first arrow through your heart.
"do you love seeing me suffer? do you enjoy bringing me to tears almost every time we meet?"
you have just uncovered something that has been cooking for a long time, and you know you are at fault. you just fail to feel wrong for it.
"it was fine at the beginning, you showed no signs of interest whatsoever. but now? the last month or two? you are driving me fucking insane."
when yunho starts swearing, you now it is bad.
"and to think that i'd actually have a chance. that you'd open yourself up for me so i can prove to you how well i can treat you. i deserve a global idiot award."
you don't speak. you let him rant, knowing that he would only get worked up more if you spoke. none of the things you had to say were comforting, so being silent was the better option.
"get the fuck out of my house."
it is the first time you see him so angry and aggressive. with full right. so you silently take your belongings, turning your back on him without a proper goodbye.
"and take this with you. i don't need anything from you." he shoves the box you had brought him into your hands.
he looks at you, teary eyed, fighting hard to keep them from spilling. you've never seen yunho cry. ever. of joy? yes. but almost shaking while holding back tears and biting his lips to keep them from quivering? perhaps it's just anger and frustration. either way, you fucked him up. and there's nothing you can do, other than leave him be.
"i hate you."
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six o'clock rolls around quite quickly. you stand in front of a motorcycle, quite bigger than you imagined. wooyoung takes his helmet off, then steps off the motorcycle. he examines you, from head to toe, a little puzzled.
"skirt? odd choice, considering that i told you we were using a motorcycle."
wooyoung then pushes your hair back, removing it from your face and letting it fall on your back. he puts the helmet on you, a slight smile on his lips as he secures it.
"you're so fucking cute it hurts. look at you in your skirt and ballerinas."
your cheeks burn from his compliments, your thighs rubbing under the delicate material. wooyoung plays with the ends of the skirt, then slips his hands on your bare skin.
"want to sit at front?" he purrs, gaze gentle and lips turned into a fond smile.
"i actually never... well, this is my first time seeing it up so close."
"so i'm your first motorcycle too? i feel honoured."
"I don't really know how to... you know, anything."
whenever you're around him, your vocabulary becomes very limited and poor. for someone who reads so much, you're struggling quite good with putting together simple sentences.
"your only job is to sit still and be pretty for me. got it?" he cups your face with one hand and gently caresses your jaw with his thumb.
you nod, not trusting yourself with speaking while he touches you in such ways.
"come on now. hop on."
you are sat in front of him, hands trapped under his while gripping the handles. you are stiff, and even if he notices, he doesn't react. he starts off slow, enough to not scare you off immediately. at one point, right at the last traffic light before exiting the city centre, he speeds up, the front of the motorcycle hanging in the air for a split second, but enough to make you gasp and fall back against his chest. you hear him chuckle near your helmet, his hand coming to rest on your hip enough to comfort you.
"i got you," he says, squeezing your hip.
you now lay comfortably against him, enjoying the smooth ride on the highway. you are alone on the road, the opposite direction crowded due to people returning home from work. you haven't felt such thrill ever. the way wooyoung controls the vehicle and smoothly changes lanes, to the way he speeds up and does the wheelie again, this time a little higher, is making you see stars. you scream, but the playful way. adrenaline rushes through your veins, and you are laughing, having the most fun of your life. he isn't saying much, and even if he was, you don't hear him. you feel comfortable in his embrace, trusting him with your life on this silent road lit by neon lights on the fences.
you gasp when you feel his cold fingers on your thigh, the texture odd. you look down, only to see that his other hand has a leather glove on, and is slowly dipping between your legs. he slows down, enough to pay more attention to you without any danger nearby. the cold leather touches your folds near your panties that have slightly moved from the reckless driving. he realises the advantage, and proceeds to rip apart the fabric. you moan at the action, remembering all those worn out pages of your books describing men ripping women's bras and panties. and now, you're a character in that page, hopefully about to have an orgasm of your lifetime.
the cold leather touches you once again, a single finger toying with your soft bud, just enough to have you panting. your head falls on his shoulder, searching for support. he circles your clit, playing with the soft flesh and checking just how wet you are getting.
"want me to stop?" he asks, and when you shake your head, he dips his fingers below your clit.
you flinch at the unfamiliar feeling, not feeling the pleasure anymore. he notices, but tries to enter once again, this time more gentle and slow. you flinch again, your head no longer resting on his shoulder. he removes his hand, gripping the handle again as he slows the vehicle. he stops at the nearby platform, the neon fence lights shining on the stone table and two benches. he gets off the motorcycle, then helps you off too. your ripped panties hit the floor, your folds caressed by the highway breeze. he takes his helmet off, hanging it on one of the handles, then helps you with yours.
you are suddenly hyperaware of the situation you are in. far from the city and people, alone in the dark with still a complete stranger, with nothing but a top and a skirt on. nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. nobody to call.
"shit, hey." wooyoung cups your face, seeing sudden anxiety on it. "do you want me to drive you back?"
you take a moment to think. if he really meant evil, wouldn't he do something by now? he wouldn't comfort you, right? wouldn't offer you a ride back? or is this just a little foreplay for him before he does something to you and leaves you to rot here?
"i mean it," the man caresses your cheeks with his thumbs.
"no, i'm good. i think."
"i am not doing anything until i am sure of it."
"no, no, i really am. i just..." you trail, looking around, "...i am very new to all of this, that's all."
wooyoung takes both of your hands, guiding you towards the stone benches and table. he sits you on the table, and he sits on the bench in front of you. he doesn't break eye-contact with you as he rubs your thighs, slightly squishing the flesh for your comfort and for his pleasure. he doesn't go further though. he gives you time to relax, until your feet start slightly swinging off the table from boredom.
"tell me about yourself."
"like what?"
"anything. just talk. i want to hear you speak. you don't do much of it, and you have such a pretty voice, especially when you make those little moans."
your cheeks are burning, and you can only look down at your hands playing with the hem of your skirt.
"come on, tell me. what do you do except studying and riding pillows these days?"
you want to say that you don't ride pillows, but the playful smile on his lips is too sweet to ruin it.
"i read, like, a lot."
"what genre is your favorite?" the man's voice is now low and raspy, his hands now slowly sliding underneath your knees.
"take a wild guess?"
"erotica?" he laughs.
you laugh with him, not yet aware of his little plan and the reason he brought you to a place far from people.
"well, tell me. what did you learn from it?"
it's like a switch was found on you. wooyoung is taking in every word you are so excitedly giving him, every expression you make as you remember various paragraphs that had you touching yourself late at night, or sometimes in the middle of the day at most random places.
"no way, you touched yourself in your college bathroom?" he is in disbelief.
"believe it or not, it becomes stronger than me. so, yes. multiple times, actually."
"what exactly did you do?" wooyoung asks, genuinely interested.
you have passed the shame barrier. the way he is caressing your skin and so comfortably talking to you about these things have you finally dropping your walls down. not even your friends have made it this far into the conversation without a smart remark or a grimace.
"just, rubbing myself, i guess? ah, i once used a water bottle to do it. it was so hot that day, and my bottle was wet and cold, and my brain just clicked."
wooyoung seems impressed, nodding his head with approval.
"i might have touched myself a little in the last row of the classroom."
"oh?" he is intrigued, mind already picturing you hidden in the last row behind your studying laptop, faking the writing while your other hand played with his new favorite thing in the world. "like this?"
the sudden contact with your clit makes you jolt, a gasp escaping your lips. he spins it in slow circles, much like you in that boring class. you breathe slowly, mouth already running dry from the sight in front of you. wooyoung stares deep into your eyes, tongue wetting his lips, and his hair messy from the highway wind. he looks incredibly good in his leather jacket and the chain necklace. you can hear yourself becoming wet, noises making both of you breathe shallow and feeding your lust drive. you feel exposed under the neon lights, under wooyoung's stare, on the side of the road. yet the pleasure is overpowering everything, and you find yourself shamelessly grinding your hips against his thumb. his confidence is affecting yours, and seeing him not give a single fuck about the location or the passerbies, it is unleashing something inside of you.
"fuck, angel, even your cunt sounds so cute."
you give yourself a moment of bravery, fingers hooking under his chain necklace and pulling his body towards you. your lips touch his, warm plush making your thighs clench. he chuckles against you, then leaves a few pecks on your bottom lip. he tugs it between his teeth, gently biting it and swiping his tongue on it. you give yourself to him, completely at his control, and only follow what he does.
he removes his hand from you, resulting in a whine leaving your mouth. he laughs again, pulling away for a moment.
"patience, baby. you're doing very good."
he kisses you again, his hands snaking around your waist and under your top. he feels your skin, the lace of your bra, plays with the hook, but doesn't undo it yet. he grazes your spine with his trimmed nails, giving you goosebumps. you shiver in his hands, wanting nothing more but to relax in his hands and have him do that to you all night long.
his tongue is restless against yours, gently rubbing against it, teeth accidentally clashing from the passion getting the most out of him. he wants all of you, right here, right now. but he can't have you just yet. like he said, he would destroy you. he can't hold back that much. he almost melts when he feels your fingers gently tug at his hair, your other hand subconsciously resting on his chest. he thinks it's cute how you are at a position above him and higher than him, yet he still has all the control over you. he also thinks it's cute how your legs are still swinging from the stone table, while you kiss him back and try to keep up with him. your kisses are short, your tongue soft, and your hair is tickling his cheeks, a complete opposite of his deep and long kisses, with an occasional teasing bite.
"wooyoung," you mumble, pulling away.
he hums, waiting for you to respond. you rest your forehead against his, taking a moment to breathe normally again.
"i want to cum on your tongue, please?" you ask so sweetly, big eyes staring into his.
"i had something else in mind, though. but i'll see what i can do, since you asked me so nicely."
he isn't sure how he can feel so soft and so hard for someone. you are the first one that is actually taking his time with him and listening to him to make it all more enjoyable. the rest of them wanted it quick, and frequent. he prefers it this way now, with more lust building up, and he knows the result will pay off. maybe you are growing impatient, maybe you'd just smack him right there on the spot, but he is very fixed on his idea, and he loves that you are listening him so patiently.
"lay down for me."
you lay on the cold surface, elbows digging into the uneven stone while they support your upper body so you can look at him. your breath hitches when his hand slides up your body, between your breasts, and up to your lips.
"open up."
and you do, taking his two fingers into your mouth. you swirl your tongue around them, slow, maintaining eye-contact with him. you are pretty sure you're dripping all over the table now, if not all over his pants too. he toys with your tongue for a while, too immersed in the way you're licking him up.
fuck, how good you'd take his cock. he'd push so slow between your glossy lips, which he would coat with his precum, and he would gently test your limits and have you gagging around him. wooyoung stops the train of thoughts before it was too late, and pulls his fingers out of your mouth. he then runs them up and down your slit, toying with the folds more than the clit. you want to groan from frustration, but you have to be patient, just like he said.
he spreads your folds, tongue diving right into the tip of your clit. your fingers reach into his hair, pulling at the dark strands and burying his head deeper into your cunt. he is loving every bit of it, willingly pushing himself deeper between your thighs and squishing them around his head. you hear him suck and lick, setting your heart on fire, and making your blood boil.
"wooyoung-" you gasp, clit abused by his restless muscle.
he only hums against you, lips sucking you slowly but with power. you don't know how loud you are, nor do you care. you let your voice loose, calling out his name, whining, bucking your hips into his mouth, moaning and chasing the orgasm that has already started to pool at the bottom of your stomach.
his fingers let go of your folds, instead focusing on a new place. he toys with your entrance, sending weird sensations through your body. ever so slowly, he pushes one finger inside, making you hold your breath at the uncomfortable feeling.
"that hurts-" you whine, all the pleasure gone.
"you can take it, right? for me?"
you look down at his eyes, the neon lights shining inside them.
"watch," he mumbles, nodding his head towards your drenched pussy.
you do as told, watching as his finger disappears into you, each pump a little less uncomfortable. he curls his finger upwards, unlocking a whole new sensation for you. you moan, more at the sight than the feeling. something about his veiny hand working on you and disappearing so smoothly inside of you is more arousing to you than a whole movie sex scene.
"i'm adding another one, alright?"
you gulp, then nod. you watch him carefully insert two fingers, slowly stretching you out. inch by inch, he fully inserts them, all the way to the knuckles, and stays there for a while.
"atta girl." he says, tone low and raspy, dripping with desire.
"it's too much," you whine, tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.
"just a little more, angel. i promise, it'll feel good." he coos, cupping your jaw with his other hand and caressing your cheek. "can you do that for me?"
you nod, fighting hard to push the tears back. the last thing you want is to turn out a coward, after all those erotica books you've told him about. reading about all that monster porn, fairy porn, and whatnot, yet you can't take two human fingers. pathetic.
"look at you, taking me so well." he praises, moving his fingers at a faster pace now.
you feel your hole stretching for the first time, and you are not sure if the sensation you are feeling is enough to make you cum. you stay still, watching him work on you, and focusing on relaxing your muscles around him. he curls his fingers up again, and another moan escapes your lips. he leans in, just enough to feel you breathe into his mouth. proper moans finally leave your mouth, and you leave all the gasps and shallow breathing behind. you shamelessly moan into his mouth, hands gripping anything they can; from his clothes and chain, to his hair and shoulders. you rock your hips along with his pumps, finally finding a path towards the sweet release. but wooyoung shows no intention of speeding up, even though you tried taking the matter into your own hands. you feel like spilling over any moment now, but the way he switches between slow and slower is driving you crazy.
"shit," he curses, suddenly pulling your body into his lap.
you moan when you sit on his fingers, knuckles trapped deep in your hole. you don't have time to process what is happening, a bright light shining into wooyoung's eyes and your back.
another motorcycle stops beside his, two people your age getting off of it.
"hey, what's up?" the stranger greets, politely waving.
the girl doesn't spare you a glance, but instead opts to stare at wooyoung.
"we're just gonna take a five minute break, sorry to bother you guys." the young man explains.
"that's fine," wooyoung smiles back.
the stranger then leaves behind one of the trees, and the girl takes a seat on the opposite of you two.
"aren't you, like, jung wooyoung?" her voice is pure torture, squeaky and fake.
"uh, yes."
"you have an enormous dick, babe. fuck, i masturbate to you almost every night."
your heart clenches, but apparently, so does your pussy, because wooyoung is quick to give you another stretch of his fingers inside you. you bite your lip, head falling on his shoulder. your back is turned towards the girl, so you cannot see if she is doing anything to get wooyoung's attention away from you. you don't like it.
"glad you enjoy my content," he replies calmly, as if he gets that every day.
maybe he does. and just then, you remember what wooyoung is. he is a cam boy, a porn star. he isn't a guy who took you on a date outside of the city. he is just someone who got tired of fucking experienced people and wants to try something new. you bite the inside of your cheek, tears gathering in your eyes now for a whole different reason.
it's his fault that he's so nice to you. didn't he say he would destroy you? you have developed a crush on him, and you didn't even realize. you need to back off, as soon as possible, before you become one of his toys for views. and with his sweet talk, it could happen without you even processing it first.
"do you do those live fuck invites anymore? i'd love to be your guest sometimes. maybe you know me, i was at top five performers last month?"
"ah, rosiedesires?" he is quick to answer.
his fingers slowly move, and you have to bury your head into his neck to keep yourself from making any noise. he smells heavenly, the scent of musk making you a little dizzy. you don't realize you are panting and whining, until he leans down to your ear.
"be good." he whispers with a little stern tone, nuzzling his nose into your cheek and leaving a quick peck there. if his fingers weren't up your pussy right now, you would've felt butterflies.
you don't know if he is mad at you, or if it's just a part of his play. either way, as bad as you are feeling, you don't want him to stop. you want him to make you cum, so that you can leave and cut all communication with him. you'll manage on your own without him, and there's still yunho. well, was. but knowing his feelings for you, he'll be quick to make up with you.
"friday night sound good?"
"yes, of course. perfect! can't wait, our followers are gonna be so excited."
did he just make a dick appointment while his fingers are deep inside of you? while you are holding back tears on his shoulder? while you are almost biting off the inside of your cheek?
"but wait, i don't do taken people. is that your partner or something?"
"ah no, that's just my coworker. he drives me home every night, we live in the same building. and uh, that..." she trails, probably pointing at you, "...is not your girlfriend?"
"no, no, of course not. she's also someone i've met on the site."
someone i've met on the site.
of course, what else did you think? that he was also falling in love with you? how stupid. now you know how yunho felt. you know exactly how he felt, when you made him feel dumb for having a one sided love. though, this isn't love yet, but still.
"shy, i see. hello, do you speak?"
the way she is talking to you is making you feel humiliated and small. as if you're an alien, asking if you speak.
"whore." you mumble.
"what?" she asks, confusion evident in her voice.
you finally raise your head, cheeks puffed and eyes red. wooyoung finally sees how bad he fucked up, and his heart breaks a little at the sight.
maybe it was just the sexual frustration. maybe it was the anger. maybe the disappointment. or maybe just the way she chewed that gum and looked at you like you were a piece of shit on the side of the road. whatever it was, it gave you enough of confidence to repeat yourself.
"whore."
"you stupid bitch," she scoffs, and you almost laugh when you see red lipstick smeared on her teeth as she calls you more names.
"openly talking about fucking a random guy and then getting offended by a single word? fucking weirdo." the words are quicker than your mind, and you feel wooyoung's fingers leaving you and instead gripping your waist.
"listen here, you fucking prude, i will fuck you up-"
"alright, let's take you home." wooyoung interrupts. "rosie, i'll reach out to you these days."
"sure thing, baby."
not so gentle anymore, wooyoung hands you the helmet. the change in his behaviour in front of a different woman is baffling to you. you feel like throwing up, and dropping right there in the middle of the road. anger is building up inside of you, enough for you to push the helmet back into his hands.
"put that on." he orders, brows knitted.
"no." you spit out.
"i will not repeat myself." his tone lowers, yet his gaze darkens.
"you don't have to." you strike back, not aware of the consequences building up.
"do you want to fucking hurt yourself? put this on right now, before i put it on for you."
fear creeps into your body, slow, and grows more with each second that passes and his gaze stays on you. you gulp, suddenly finding yourself in a mental conflict. you do not want to go with him. you want to stay here, curl up under the table and cry until morning, and mourn that little hope you had left and that he crushed. yet he is your only way home. but it is such a long drive, and you don't have the energy to be near him.
so you turn your back, and start walking towards the city lights.
"and just what do you think you are doing?" wooyoung grabs your elbow, pulling your body against his.
"leave me be."
"i asked, what do you think you are doing?" he asks again, gaze not softening.
"i am going home."
"you're-"
"jung wooyoung," you say through gritted teeth," i. am. going. home."
and with that, you start your way to the distant skyscrapers. it hurts you that only two minutes after, two motorcycles pass by you, one of them very familiar. he only spares you a glance through the mirror, then speeds up and disappears.
finally, you cry. loud sobs, chest heavy and body shaking. you drag your legs for what seems like hours, yet the buildings remained the same. you pull out your phone, searching through contacts. nobody is close enough with you for you to call them and pick you up. except your only fast dial, yunho.
what is there to lose? you've reached the bottom anyways.
it takes only two rings for him to pick up, and you fail to greet him. instead, a sob leaves your mouth.
"tiny?" he calls, voice concerned.
"can you please come get me?"
to say that yunho was furious would be an understatement. you haven't told him anything yet, but it was enough to find you sitting alone on a bench outside of the city, on a road where prostitutes and dealers often met, with ripped panties laying on the floor.
his heart is tight, and he feels his throat closing as he approaches you. dark lines decorate your puffed cheeks, the makeup you always so happily put on now a fluid disaster. you run into yunho's arms, finally warm and secure. he buries his noise into your hair, leaving kisses on top of your head as he rubs your back. he knows what to do when you're upset, and you are grateful for that. you need silent support, no questions, no getting you to talk, just someone's presence and comfort. you finally look into his eyes, and just when you thought you cried it all out, you start sobbing again.
"it's okay." he assures you, cupping your face.
"can i stay-" you hiccup, your lungs having a hard time to balance breathing and speaking, "can i-"
you sob again, frustrated because you can't form a sentence. you feel like ripping your hair out because of your stupidity.
"you can stay at my place," yunho understands, gently guiding you towards his car and opening the back door for you.
"no, no-"
"there's more space for you to lay down. trust me, you'll be comfortable."
"i want the front."
"but-"
"please."
yunho doesn't immediately drive to his place. he drives past the highway exits for the city, and you are too tired to question it. you fight to stay awake, but the burning sensation of your eyes is making it quite difficult. every now and then, yunho glances at you, making sure you're alright and comfortable. you have your seat pushed back, and your body turned towards him. it makes you feel safer when you open your eyes and see him in front of you.
the lights are fading, allowing the moonlight to take over and illuminate yunho's face. has he always been this pretty?
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you're skipping classes, opting to stay in yunho's bed instead. you're rotting in his room, only watching him come and go. he has a job, and classes to attend, and by the time he finally gets home, you are fast asleep. the food he so carefully prepares you stays cold on the counter, flies getting to it before you do. it is making him sad, seeing you in such a state. you didn't speak of that night, and he didn't want to ask in case you go further into your shell.
today was no different. you are awoken by his alarm, then him tossing and turning on his side. he is careful to leave a distance between you two, even when he is asleep. you feel the warmth leave the space behind your back, then hear footsteps. you hear shuffling, and you open your eyes to see what he is wearing today.
he wears a plain white t-shirt, black ripped jeans, and a leather jacket. the weather is still confusing, and you are glad you don't have to tell him to bring a jacket with him. he also wears his signature boots, sitting on your side of the bed as he puts them on.
"yuyu?" you call.
"yes, sweetheart?"
"when are you coming home today?"
he stays silent. you think he doesn't hear you, so you repeat. yunho sighs.
"i don't have classes today. and i have a day off."
"oh," is all you can say. you aren't sure if it's a sound of disappointment or surprise. either way, you are not thrilled.
"i'll be back in a few hours."
he doesn't look at you. instead, he stands up, picking up his bag and house keys. you finally sit up straight, blanket still wrapped around you.
"where-" you clear your throat, voice coming out raspy and cracking, "-where are you going?"
"a date."
yunho finally spares you a glance, one enough to let you know that he grew tired of you playing with his emotions, and is tired catering to you when all of his efforts have gone to waste.
"there's food in the fridge if you get hungry. i'm having breakfast outside."
then there you are, again in the dark room, alone with your thoughts. you think about both of them. yunho, who has been by your side for so long, and has respected your boundaries despite his strong feelings. and wooyoung, who is there just a few weeks, yet has such a strong impact on you. you feel discarded by both sides. yunho? justified. wooyoung? not as much.
yes, he is just a porn star. yes, you may be delusional. and yes, he might fuck other people. but the urge in you to feel him just one more time, to let him teach you so you can be good enough for someone you truly care about, is burning inside of you.
bullshit. you want to be good enough for him. you have always been way more intrigued by things you cannot have. wooyoung is an unattainable goal, something you can only dream of having. then again, what do you actually want with him? you only know him sexually, you know nothing about him as a person. you only crave him physically, while you crave yunho emotionally.
but you can't have both, and the way the tables have turned, you are left with neither.
the day is slow, and the sun is going down with the tiktoks on your phone screen. when you feel your stomach tighten and growl, you finally glance at the room around you. it is dark, it smells like old clothes, and the lack of fresh air starts suffocating you. yunho's washed, unironed work clothes sit on his gaming chair, waiting to be ironed by him. it would have been done long time ago, if you didn't take up his whole room.
you switch between the apps, from tiktoks to reels, to youtube shorts, then back to reels. you've seen every video possible, not a single one funny anymore. you feel numb. your stomach is giving you signals, which you so successfully ignore. much like your bladder. it is hitting your ovaries, causing indescribable pain, yet you choose to lay there and mourn over your will to live. you return to the instagram homepage, and when you see yunho's icon in the stories, you just have to click it. when you do, you see him posing with a young woman your age, at the breakfast place you used to visit the first year of college. he has ordered his usual, you notice. and she has ordered yours.
he looks genuinely happy, his smile wide, and his eyes squinted. his arm is wrapped around her shoulders, and the other one holds the phone taking the picture. she is busy holding his face in her hand, lightly squishing his cheeks, just like you like to do.
"fuck me." you groan, then shut your phone off.
as if a switch has clicked inside of you, you run to the bathroom, eager to end your suffering. it takes you less than half an hour to take a shower, put on clean clothes, and do the basic skin care you have ignored for a few days now. you use yunho's expensive products, of course. he won't mind as long as he doesn't know you used them.
by the time the sun sets, the room looks brand new. you have put on new sheets, dusted the shelves, vacuumed the floor, and even ironed his clothes and neatly put them in the closet. the messy notes on his desk were now waiting for him in the drawer, with an attached pink note from you of the solution to the math problem he has been trying to solve on four pages now.
in the kitchen, you fish for ingredients. you decide to make his favorite for when he comes home, to at least thank him somehow for giving you comfort and support these days.
what time do you think you are coming?
yunho: around half an hour to an hour, i think. why?
i am making dinner, i didn't want to start early so it doesn't get cold.
you see the three dots on his screen popping up a few times, then disappearing. you set the phone aside, focusing on the garlic and onion in the pan so they don't get burnt. he loves your pasta bolognese, and won't eat it anywhere but from you. special flavor, he says. you don't have the heart to tell him that you just add in one more spice that the restaurants don't. you don't want to break the little tradition of you making pasta late at night for the two of you.
your phone pings, twice.
wooyoung has started a live! tap to watch.
yunho: i'm not coming for dinner. sorry x
and it's all it takes. really, that's all.
it takes less than five minutes for you to shut off the stove, then settle in the freshly made bed, yunho's boxers already pooling at your ankles. you realize how pathetic you look, getting ready to touch yourself to a guy that left you on the side of the road, in your best friend's bed. but to be fair, you were stubborn too. maybe you just didn't expect him to let you go so easily. maybe you expected him to stay back and comfort you, say sorry because of his harsh actions. or at least reach out to you afterwards. but no, jung wooyoung kept his distance. you checked the messages, regularly. not even an online tag from him. nothing.
until now.
wooyoung has started a live with rosiedairies! tap to watch.
your stomach tightens. is it friday already? time for that dick appointment. your finger hovers over the notificaton, mind working hard to figure out whether or not you can handle looking at something like that. you convince yourself that you can. it's just sex. it's not like you've never seen it before.
your finger taps the notification, and your screen take up two naked bodies, already going at it. it isn't hot at all. you could swear that all your arousal has dried up within two seconds.
wooyoung has the camera showing her face as she stays in doggy position and only his lower body is visible behind her, hips snapping harshly into hers. it doesn't look real. it look so staged and fake, ugly and raw. but she seems to love it, judging by the way her eyes roll to the back of her head and the noises overpowering the ones of skin clapping. wooyoung pulls her hair, and even though you've fantasized about that too, it isn't quite like this. all that hair pulling in your fanfics and books was indeed harsh, but still with a note of passion and love. this? this was pure pain.
"harder, harder-" she chokes, seductively looking at the camera.
what she asks, wooyoung delivers. the grip on her waist makes her skin white, likely to leave bruises afterwards. he picks up the camera, angling it on her bottom and his pelvis. the sight isn't a turn on for you, but you notice the condom, the bruises on her skin, and the scratch marks on his body. the people in the comment section are going feral, giving him orders on what to do to her, on what they'd like to do to him, and sending lots of money. you're grossed out, and just when you are about to exit the site, you hear the front door shut.
you pull the boxers up, jumping out of the bed and making it. you lock your phone, throwing it on the nightstand, before rushing to the bathroom and shutting the door. you hear footsteps, and not double ones like you expected. you fix your hair in the mirror, trying for that i woke up like this look.
"it's me," he announces while entering the room.
"back already?"
"wow."
you fail to hide the smile because of his reaction. he was probably expecting to find you laying under a blanket with your phone on full volume, like he did for the past few days. you didn't even take care of yourself, let alone help him with chores. you wanted to redeem yourself, at least a little bit.
you exit the bathroom as nonchalantly as you can, as if you didn't just do a 180° in the time he was out. he looks even more dashing than when he left. his hair is messy and skin glowing, and his lips have that red tint that suits him so well.
"how was your date?"
"it was great," he avoids your gaze while scratching his neck, "we're going on a second one sunday evening. making it fancy this time."
"that's so awesome! i'm happy for you."
your acting is so convincing, it has yunho feeling disappointed with your behaviour. sure, you wouldn't be jealous. but wouldn't you be bothered at least a little bit? a random girl entering your lives and taking up his free time instead of you, and you are happy?
"what do you say we go out for breakfast tomorrow, and i'll tell you everything?" he tests the grounds.
"sounds wonderful." you don't drop your guard.
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you forget that yunho doesn't know the actual situation with wooyoung. so when he stops in front of the coffee shop the next morning and holds the door open for you, you rather enter than make a fuss out of it. you slide into your usual seat, letting yunho take the orders. the familiar man exits the pantry, smile dropping when he sees his next costumer. he immediately searches for your figure in the seating area, and upon finding you, he fails to hide a smile. you, on the other hand, don't. you stand your ground, poker face on and emotions on standby. for now.
"iced americano and a strawberry mocha?"
"yes," yunho confirms, "extra-"
"extra syrup, whipped cream, pearls. got it."
yunho looks annoyed, but doesn't say anything. he almost throws the money at wooyoung, tells him to keep the change, then joins you at the table.
you finally take a good look at him. each day, he is getting more attractive in your eyes. did he always dress this handsomely? was he always this tall?
"you like my coat?" he laughs, noticing your stare.
"well, yes. suits you. the turtleneck too. when did you get a fashion sense?"
"i've got to attract the ladies somehow." yunho jokes, then becomes serious once he sees wooyoung approaching with the beverages.
the cup is placed in front of you, and right away, you see a difference. knowing that you'll let it slide, yunho decides to speak for you.
"pearl sprinkles. not this rainbow puke."
"i only have rainbow puke." wooyoung scoffs, throwing the paper straws on the table. "drink it, or don't. i don't care."
"you should've told me that when i ordered." yunho keeps pushing, and the tension between the two is making you squirm in the chair.
"well guess what?" wooyoung leans in, one hand on the table, the other on the back of your chair. his face is inches away from yours, eyes fixed on your widened ones.
"get away from her, that's highly unprofessional."
"if she minded, she would've said something," the barista looks over at yunho for a split second, then returns his gaze on you, "but she doesn't mind, do you, darling?"
stuck between not wanting to hurt yunho, and wanting to subconsciously submit to wooyoung, you remain silent. wooyoung stays in the position for what seemed like hours, even though it was mere three seconds of it, then finally takes his position behind the counter.
"right, forgot he's your new boyfriend," the man on your opposite scoffs and takes a sip of his beverage.
"he's not-"
"kiyomi will be here any minute, by the way. can't wait for you to meet her."
"woah, is she okay with meeting me so soon? i mean, your first date was yesterday?"
he shrugs, glancing at his phone, "i don't see why not. you're just a friend. it's not like you're a relative or someone closer."
ouch.
"right," you clear your throat.
as promised, she arrives, breaking the silence and interrupting yunho's twitter scrolling. she's pretty, just like on the picture. the moment she sits next to him and starts talking, you see she is obsessed with him. she is joyful, talkative, optimistic, everything that you currently aren't. you notice wooyoung looking over multiple times, but what you don't notice is the way yunho is examining your face, looking for any clues of jealousy or discomfort.
you seem unaffected, and it makes his heart ache. just what does he have to do to get to you? getting a girl just to experiment didn't work, and now he has to either let the poor girl go or keep fueling her hopes and leave her later, until he gets a reaction from you. yumho hates himself for doing that. but yunho hates you too, as much as he loves you. you break his heart every day, but every time you look at him, you put it back together so easily. he wants to kiss you, as much as he wants to push you away from himself. he is lost in his own emotions, and doesn't know what he wants anymore.
"excuse me, i'll be right back."
"where are you going?" yunho betrays himself, asking you too quickly.
"toilet. wanna come?" you try to lighten the situation with a joke, seeing his date tense up at his reaction.
"ah no, thanks. gross. you go enjoy yourself. don't fall in." he joins in the joke, also taking notice of his partner's body language.
you enter the toilet, ignoring the cash register where wooyoung has busied himself with typing something on the screen. the you in the mirror looks like she is mocking you, your clothes and your behaviour. you've put on the newest dress you had, and you don't even know for who. both of them? you like yunho's soft lingering gaze on you, yet you enjoy the way wooyoung looks a second away from devouring you on that table. it's a simple long sleeved dress, really, paired with knee-high boots yunho had bought you for christmas.
the door swings open, bumping into you and pushing you against the wall. you only catch a glimpse of the familiar apron, before the man cups your face and presses his lips on yours. you are taken aback, body frozen against the cold tiles. wooyoung holds your face gently, lips moving slow as to not scare you off more.
"i'm sorry, i'm so fucking sorry," he whispers against your lips, pecking them a few times before apologizing again.
"wooyoung-"
"please, let me make it up to you. i don't care what that cunt outside says, i don't believe him anyway, just let me make it up to you."
you're having a hard time thinking rationally. do you really trust him enough to not hurt you again? fuck, but his lips feel so good. but oh, how yunho's hugs feel like home.
but nobody has ever shown desire the way wooyoung does.
yet nobody has more patience for you than yunho.
"you're thinking too much. let me fix that."
your lips are trapped by his once again, this time more rhythmic. you give into the touch, erasing the man outside completely from your mind.
"you're so sweet."
you hum against his lips, hands tugging at his white ironed shirt, the first two buttons separated as always.
"so cute." kiss. "so pretty." kiss. "so adorable." kiss. "so perfect."
you're not sure where it is going, but you do not complain. you do not complain when he lifts you on the counter near the sink either, flipping your dress up and ripping your panties again. you feel your core tighten, and you think you'll just never get enough of the picture of him ripping your clothes apart.
"let me make you melt on my tongue. please, god, I need it. i so desperately need you, all of you."
"here?" you ask, glancing at the door.
"here, out there, in the pantry, at your place, my place, everywhere. i'd take you to the roof if you told me to."
"anyone could walk in-"
you gasp mid sentence, cold metal pressing against your clit. wooyoung intentionally rubs your folds with his knuckles, giving you the cold sensation of his rings. your head rests against the mirror, hips already grinding into his hand.
loosing his patience, wooyoung sinks to his knees, your legs resting over his shoulders. he dives in, like it's his last meal. he licks hot stripes up your clit, pointy part of his tongue flicking the tip of it. you moan each time he does so, feeling your bud already becoming abused.
while he usually takes his time with you, today he is quick to separate your legs and go feral on you. his tongue is quick, so quick that it has you shaking uncontrollably against his mouth. you're shuddering, begging, pulling at his hair, all at once. a blabbering mess, as he eats you like there's no tomorrow. he dips his tongue into your arousal, letting out a moan of satisfaction.
"can i please cum?" you ask, knowing that he never lets you. why would today be different?
"no, no. not yet." he moves away, standing up and getting back to your face. "it needs to be special."
"it's just an orgasm, how special can it be?"
"mine always are, believe me. i want to be your first real one. i want you to remember it." wooyoung says as he continues to caress your cheeks with his thumbs.
the action is affectionate, as if he just confessed to having a crush on you and didn't just eat you out. funny how every time you meet him, you end up getting absolutely devoured by him in ways that you didn't even read about. he is passionate about it, to the point that it makes you think that he does it for his own pleasure.
"come over to my place."
"what?" your voice comes out louder than you wanted it.
"my place. i'll take good care of you. give you what you deserve."
you don't have time to reply, he is pulling you off the sink and disappearing into a stall. a quick glance in the mirror is enough to make your hands shoot up to your hair, straightening it and fixing the smeared mascara on the corner of your eyes.
"hey?"
yunho's head peeks inside, scanning the room. he sees you alone, and immediately feels at ease.
"yes, yunho?"
"i just got worried, you've been here for a while." he admits.
"so you left your date alone?" you can't bear to look him in the eyes, not when you just finished messing with the person he saved you from the other night.
"to be truthful, i saw that shitass barista disappear somewhere, and i thought he came after you. i'd hate to think that something happened to you and i was sitting just outside."
you appreciate his truthfulness, and don't have the heart to tell him just how weak to your instincts you are.
"don't worry, i'm good. let's go."
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wooyoung: it's been almost a week
wooyoung: you don't think about me at all?
wooyoung: my offer, i mean. not me.
you don't know if you're being delusional, but you feel like the tables have turned. which is why you have reached out to another friend, one that doesn't have feelings for you and won't try to sabotage, well, whatever this is.
"honestly, from all these messages, you have unknowingly made him chase you. notice how you don't say much and he comes back texting you multiple times?" choi san is quick to explain, using his own flirting skills to decipher the conversation.
he lays on his stomach on your bed, pillow under it and legs swinging in the air. his freshly dyed blonde hair is a dry mess, struggling to hold onto his scalp. you wonder why his job requires him to ruin himself this much.
"now what do i do?"
"well, luckily for you, your lack of communication is what got you an advantage here. let's face it, you're dry as fuck."
"thanks."
"welcome. anyways, in your case, that's good. see? instead of giving up and leaving, he keeps coming back to you. and eating your pussy every time you two meet? are you kidding me? that man is obsessed with you."
at the mention of him eating you, your thighs clench, almost feeling his tongue down there. it is driving you crazy, having so much pleasure yet not reaching the peak. he is torturing you, on purpose.
wooyoung: i'll make you cum so hard you'll never wish for anyone but me
wooyoung: and that's a promise.
two new messages light up your phone, san grabbing it before you can. he covers his mouth, eyes wide as he reads the messages over and over. he unlocks the phone, and begins typing.
"no!"
"i'm doing you a favor!" he exclaims, running around the room and still typing.
you hear the sending sound, and your face heats up. he throws the phone on your bed, and sits right next to you.
"what have you done?"
"see for yourself. that, my dear, is called not being dry."
bold of you to think that i'll only wish for you
"that doesn't sound like me at all! you blew it!"
you are quick to bury your face in a pillow, already mourning all this time you've spent and regretting inviting san to help. but when another notification decorates your screen, you almost jump.
wooyoung: why don't you come over for a demostration?
"you do realize that if you go, you might lose your v-card?"
"i know."
"and you're sure that's the person you want to do it with?"
"yes."
he believes you as much as you believe yourself. you always thought your first time would be somewhere romantic, pre-planned, with the person you love and loves you back. not in the apartment of a porn star. and not with someone that only knows your name.
"you know, my heart really hurts for yunho."
"i invited you to avoid him. why are you bringing him up?" your fierce tone takes him aback, and it takes you aback too, you just manage to not show it.
"wow." san exhales.
"sorry, just- it's none of your business."
"how is it none of my business? i mean, i tried to not get involved, even came here to help you hook up with a complete stranger and help you throw away the best thing that can and will happen to you. i introduced you to yunho, knowing full well on his harmless little crush on you, and knowing full well that you were perfect for him. only to have you-"
"wait a minute, you can't guilt trip me into liking him."
the man in front of you is baffled with your reply, and you feel like you're not looking at one of your close friends anymore. now, you are looking at yunho's best friend, almost his younger brother. you forgot that before you, there was the two of them.
"someone seriously needs to fuck that attitude right out of you. you're acting like an animal in heat."
"well i'm fucking trying to!"
"well you're trying the wrong fucking way!"
"do not tell me who and how to fuck!"
the phone is pinging on your bed, not helping the situation at all. san is looking more disappointed than angry, his eyes becoming scarily dark.
"the fuck do you even know about fucking?"
"i know enough." you don't drop your guard.
san takes a step towards you, examining your face. then another, and another, until you are pushed in the corner of your room with him towering over you. there is nothing attractive about it in this situation, and you wish
"you may know about fucking, but you don't know shit about loving."
"shut up," is the only thing you manage to say, biting back tears.
"i am not guilt tripping you to like or love anyone, but the least you could do is let him down gently and stop playing push and pull with him. giving him hope, then shattering him right after it? not quite moral in my book."
"look, i'm in a difficult situation. i just- i like them both."
choi san laughs, sarcastically. he doesn't find it funny. he just doesn't know how to respond anymore.
"you don't like them both. you like wooyoung, and want to keep yunho as a backup."
"excuse-?"
"save it. i don't even know why i came here, helping you hurt my friend. you have started thinking with your pussy more than your brain, and you're losing people because of it. if you're horny, watch fucking porn."
with that, he grabs his leather jacket off your bed, and storms outside. you are feeling frustrated, angry, and sad. he is right, you know it. but you don't want to admit it. because somehow, in your head, if you don't admit it, it isn't like that. ignoring a problem makes it go away. simple as that.
you want to keep yunho, and his love, and his affection, but you want a taste of wooyoung so bad. so bad that your clit aches when you open his messages, yearning for his cold fingers and hot tongue.
wooyoung: do you like movies?
wooyoung: i thought we could watch the live adaptation of that book you like reading
wooyoung: what was it again?
wooyoung: if you want to, of course
wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.
you stop breathing for a moment, thinking of all the things you could expect in that image. you breathe out when you open it, seeing a pullout sofa and a blanket on it, along with snacks and two bottles of soda.
wooyoung: i'd be happy if you joined me :)
why, rosie unavailable?
wooyoung: i'm gonna go ahead and ignore that, for the sake of both of us
whatever that means
why are you the one sabotaging yourself now? yunho isn't here, and san has left too. then why?
wooyoung: it means that i don't like it when people mock what i do
wooyoung: and when people mock me, i become angry
wooyoung: and angry and horny don't go well together
wooyoung: unless you want to put it to test?
wooyoung angry fucking you? you grimace. would it be the kind of sex he did in his last live with that rosie girl? if yes, you are feeling very turned off right now. he must've sensed the lack of replying on your side, and is quick to respond again.
wooyoung: can't help it, sorry
wooyoung: just come over and we can hang?
your phone pings, sending you a message with a different name on top.
choi san: bet his new live will bring him a fortune. who else has taken someone's virginity live on a porn site?
what the fuck are you on about? there's no live.
choi san: that's what you think
choi san: or that's what he'll make you think
choi san: unless he convinces you to willingly do it
he wouldn't. would he? wooyoung who has asked you before each contact whether you're sure, or whether you're feeling nervous. wooyoung who already had his hands on your tits, and still wanted to ask if you're sure. he wouldn't secretly film you. he wouldn't.
what do you consider a hang? and why?
wooyoung: just hang? watch that movie and talk?
wooyoung: because
wooyoung: idk
wooyoung: you're so stiff and awkward yet i wanna know more about you and see you
wooyoung: i guess i want to be the one to unstiff you?
wooyoung: NOT LIKE THAT
wooyoung: i dropped my cool guy vibe just like that
wooyoung: look at me texting you multiple times in a row
wooyoung: i've never ever done that in my life for anyone
wooyoung: so...?
so san was right. you did unintentionally make him chase you. played hard to catch without even knowing it. you have a whole porn star folding for you, and offering you all you ever wanted. or at least you think you wanted.
ping!
yunho: hey just wanted to ask if everything is alright?
yunho: sorry if i somehow hurt you
yunho: you seem a little distant, and i know it might be because of the kiyomi situation, but i promise i care about you so much
yunho: if you want you can come over and we can make that pasta together?
yunho: i also want to talk to you
yunho: properly
it's now or never.
you gonna pick me up or?
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you sit in the familiar car, the smell of it relaxing you. he knows how to make scents work and not make them literally bite your nose. you take a good look at him. he wears a simple short sleeved black t-shirt, along with grey ripped jeans and black boots. his hair is a little messy, but it only adds up to his look. every time you see him, you forget just how good he looks.
"angel?"
"wooyoung?"
he laughs, eyes not moving off the road.
"are you okay?"
"yes." you simply reply, shifting your attention to the surrounding houses.
you don't speak the rest of the way, just enjoying his humming and wheel tapping. it isn't uncomfortable silence. at least not for you. you can also hear faint vibrations coming from your phone in your bag, and you know exactly who they belong to.
"whoever that is, they sure are persistent." wooyoung comments.
"sorry. i'll shut it off."
"oh, no. please. i was just noticing."
you finally take the phone out, screen bombarded with his notifications. just when you wanted to clear the notification tab, he calls, and you click the green phone.
"shit."
"hello?"
wooyoung glances at your phone, eyebrows furrowed. he keeps driving, not saying a word.
"hey, yunho, now is not a good time-"
"it never is lately anyway. listen, i will just say what i wanted to like this."
"yunho, no-"
"i love you. i don't even think about the words like or crush anymore, i know, i'm sure, that i love you. and i know you're slipping away from me, and i know there's no way to stop it."
you stare at wooyoung, who is carefully listening to the voice coming from your device. you are shaking, thoughts running wild. you are becoming more aware of your feelings towards yunho, and aware about the situation you are putting yourself in. you are on your way to shatter everything you've ever had with him, and everything you could've had with him. for just a taste of what seemed to only exist in your mind.
"i won't blame you if you go with him. i'm just afraid of you getting hurt, maybe worse than that night. and this time i might not be around to fix it. i do not have the energy anymore. i'm sorry."
san was right about this too, and you hate him for it. all this time you subconsciously kept yunho as a backup. you've convinced yourself that he isn't your type, and you did so good at it. until now.
"i'm not saying you should respond to any of my feelings, but it would've been nice if you came to me and said something along the lines of "sorry yunho, i don't think we will ever be what you want us to be" instead of luring me in and pushing me around. calling me when you need it, then ignore me when you get what you want. i hate that i love you, and i hate that i have to humiliate myself like this every damn time. but i promised myself this would be my last. unless you really wish to discuss all of this properly, and whether or not you want our friendship to continue despite all this. tonight is your last chance. i am speaking to you as a friend now. i want to know where i stand."
you are speechless. he has touched the darkest spot in your heart. that dusty corner reserved for love. the kind of love san accused you of not knowing. how are you supposed to respond when there is a whole man next to you, a man who has also asked you to hang and talk tonight?
"i'll wait until midnight. if you don't show up, that will also help me know where i stand. but then, know that you might not hear from me anymore."
the phone call ends just in time when wooyoung pulls up in his parking spot. he silently exits, opening the door for you. still overwhelmed by the one sided conversation that just happened, you remain seated.
"if you're going to be sulky like that, i will just drive you to him." wooyoung offers, annoyance clear in his tone.
you feel a little irritated for his lack of empathy. but who would empathize with such an awful person like yourself? wooyoung sighs, then crouches in front of the open door on your side.
"you can't sit on two stools at a time, angel. i understand that emotions are hard, and love is complicated. right now, i am offering you something simple, and something harmless. i am not looking for love, i think. i just want to help you discover, and i want to discover you."
not looking for love, that you know. but it feels different hearing it out loud. the i think part right after it went right over your head, only adding to the you really are dense agenda.
"yunho is offering you commitment. real love. something i'm not quite capable of giving you, or anyone. i think with my dick, and he thinks with his heart. that creates a problem for you, because you want to be loved, but you also want a dick to make you stop thinking."
you aren't sure if he is dirty talking, or if this is just the way he speaks about these things. you finally look at him. his hand reaches for yours, gently guiding you out of the car.
"you can sit down and think inside."
but there was not much thinking. you were quick to lay on top of wooyoung, entirely relaxed in his arms as his nails grazed the skin of your thighs. non sexually. just innocent pleasure and the movie playing in the back. but you can't relax all the way, because you know where tonight will lead. you squirming under wooyoung's touch, the only emotions present being lust and yeaerning. you liked yunho. you really did. but the way wooyoung handles you is not like any other. you need to have it, at least one more time.
"you're not watching the movie."
"i know."
"then what are you doing?"
"thinking."
wooyoung sighs. his hands halt on your waist, then help you sit up on his lower stomach as he stays laying down.
"be honest with me. what exactly do you want? i won't judge you."
"i don't know." you lie.
"let me try a different approach. what do you want with me? be completely raw, so we can both know where we stand."
and you do just that. tell him all about your desires, about the feeling of lust which you've mistaken as a crush towards him, about loving how desirable you are feeling when it comes to him, and everything that comes to your mind. he listens, slowly nodding his head as you speak.
"i guess i want to have a little fun with no commitment before the, you know, actual commitment."
"i understand. now, what do you want with yunho?"
"everything."
you do want everything with him. from the kisses he is dying to offer you to whatever kinkery he has hidden behind those shiny eyes. yunho is a man every girl wants, including you, yet he only has heart eyes for you. and you'd be stupid to let that go.
"then go for it."
"see, the thing is- i already got a taste of you. and i want closure. i want to finally get that orgasm you've been delaying for so long."
wooyoung nods, eyebrows a little scrunched. he is focused on putting a stray hair behind your ear, and when that hair refuses to obey him over and over again, he huffs, and finally gives your sentence attention.
"we need to discuss first. what kind of orgasm are we talking?"
"what do you mean?"
"well, now that you've finally come to terms with your feelings towards that yunho dude, taking your v-card is off the table?"
"yeah, i guess." you shrug, as if it was just a hug you were talking about.
"just to warn you, it hurts like hell."
"that i know. thanks."
"he can reach out to me for some tips if he wants. just saying."
"got it."
he smiles, then proceeds.
"filming is off the table?"
"uh-"
"just asking, not forcing. if we are going to do simple oral and, or, fingering, then you know... i'd maybe like some footage. at least for me to enjoy sometimes."
come to think of it, it is risky, and it is something that you wouldn't do ever again when or if you become yunho's partner. this is maybe a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you don't want to waste it.
"i'll give you back by midnight, baby." he winks.
"okay." you agree.
you feel your heart beat faster, and louder. you have just agreed to be filmed, in a stranger's house, touched by that same stranger, and the video will be up for so many people to see. so what? you'll ask him to blur or cut the face out of the frame. simple as that.
"come on then."
the young man stands up, giving you his open hand. little do you know that the gaze you're giving him from below him on that couch is making his pants feel very tight.
you accept his hand, and allow him to lead you to his room. your eyes land on the bed. the very same bed and pillows where he filmed that live, and many other lives after that. wooyoung then gently pushes you towards the bed, hands grazing your waist while his eyes admire your outfit. it looks so easy to take off.
he carefully pushes you on the bed, and you swear you've never felt a mattress so soft. he climbs on the bed, hovering over you and giving you one more head to toe scan.
"so pretty." he whispers.
"thank you." you say, not knowing what else to do.
he laughs, then leans in to give you a kiss sweeter than those cake pops you used to eat throughout your whole high school. he kisses you again, again and again, until you start yearning for more. you reach for his shoulders, hair, neck, anything to make him deepen the kiss and give you one of his passionate ones. he takes his time, playing with your bottom lip and tugging it between his teeth.
"patience." he instructs, then untangles your hands from his hair.
he reaches towards the nightstand. the same nightstand from which he pulled that clear toy out that night you discovered him. instead of something crazy, he pulls a single piece of long fabric. the fabric is shiny and pink, with lace decorating it.
"you trust me?"
"completely."
"that's a good girl." he kisses your forehead before putting the silk over your eyes. "raise your head for me a little bit."
you do as told, enough so he can tie it up behind your head. he adjusts your hair, letting it fall over your shoulders, then traces his finger down your neck and to your collarbones. you almost shiver at his touch. he continues his journey to your shoulders, gently pulling down the sleeves of your dress, then does the same to the other. you feel like everything is ten times more intense, since you can't see anything anymore.
he pulls his hand back, then shuffles on top of you for a while. you hear something hit the floor, and then feel the mattress dip between your legs. wooyoung takes your hand, guiding it towards a  source of warmth. you breathe out when you touch his warm skin, nails yearning to dig into it. he helps you trace his abs, his formed chest, and all the way down to his defined v-line. you feel a few veins leading to a place of heaven, or hell, and you have to bite your lip to keep you from smiling.
this is exactly what you want.
"can i see?" you ask nicely.
"no. just feel." he declines, and you hear him smile as he says that.
"okay." you comply, using the opportunity to touch a little more
he then gets off the bed again, and you hear slight rattling. he must be setting up the camera. it doesn't take long for him to come back, placing an object next to you at a certain position.
"i'm only going to be filming myself and your lower body, alright? something like your point of view? you okay with that?"
"yes."
"you sure?"
"yes." you breathe out, feeling his hands caressing your hips.
"we need a safe word, angel."
"god, i don't know, just touch me already. please." you beg like a pathetic slut.
"i know you're impatient, but i really need you to think of a word."
"i don't know." you're becoming annoyed with him.
"how about..." he hums, then kisses your jawline, "mocha?"
"y-yes, that sounds good." you stutter as he plants kisses along your jawline, going down your neck and stopping at collarbones.
"so when you say mocha, i'm stopping everything i'm doing. got it?"
"yes."
"good. i'm turning it on now."
you hear a click, then a short sound. he waits a little, probably for people to join.
"hi, my favorite people. i would do some talking, but to be honest, i can't wait to dive into today's special."
you don' t have time to process his words, he is shuffling through the drawers again. wooyoung then takes your clothes off, and you help him by raising your hips, pulling your arms out your sleeves, all to make him satisfied. he plants a kiss on your knuckles, thumb grazing over them before he sets your hand back down. his lips hover above your skin, blowing cool air along the line of the lingerie bra you wore.
"i like you more in those pastels." he admits.
the man cups your breasts, slowly massaging them and letting his thumbs graze your tense buds over the thin black lace. you squirm under his touch, feeling the pleasure pool in your lower stomach. you swear you could cum from only nipple touching if he did it long enough. you could try that once.
"she's awfully quiet, isn't she? what should i do to her?" he speaks to the camera.
he then takes a few seconds to read the written suggestions, and then chuckles.
"take off the bra? oh, but i quite like it like this. it makes the situation sexier and more intimate. doesn't look like that raw porn you can find on pornhub, right?"
he is right. you got all dolled up for him, would be a shame if he took everything off so soon. you feel a warm wet muscle trace around your areola, building anticipation. his other hand plays with it too, not once touching the nerve ending that is angrily sticking out and demanding attention. he finally gives in, closing his lips around the tense bud and ever so lightly grazes it with the tip of his tongue.
you gasp, arching your back from the mattress. his hand is quick to find its place on your stomach, pushing  your body back down and caressing your skin along the way.
"atta girl." he praises, seeing just how obedient you are for him.
his teeth graze your nipple, then gently tug at it. you twitch, hands flying towards him in hopes to grab his hair. he is quick to grab your wrists, pinning your hands above your head.
"i'm the one doing the exploring, angel. you lay there for me like the patient pretty doll you are."
you nod, immediately becoming still. his fingers find a path down your stomach, to the line of your panties. he caresses the skin right above your clit, circling it, grazing the inside of your thighs, your folds, all while ignoring the burning place right in the middle of all that. your hips almost buck into his hand, but you remember to be good. he pushes the panties aside, revealing you to himself and the camera.
"oh, so pretty." he exhales.
you hear him put his fingers in his mouth, coating them in saliva, then dip between your folds. you whine when he touches the tip of your clit, spinning it in circles and making you gasp for air. your hands are still pinned above your head, and his knee is fast to hold your legs open by pressing the inside of your thigh into the mattress. he then dips his fingers below, first one, then two. the feeling of strange and a little uncomfortable is back, but when he starts pumping in and out at a slow pace, occasionally curling his fingers up, you are a moaning mess. you can hear just how wet you are for him, and each time he buries his fingers deep inside of you, you have to fight the urge to moan louder.
"wish you could see just how well you're taking me."
you remember how absolutely hot it looked that night, seeing his fingers disappear inside of you.
"good, good girl. one more? think you can handle?"
there is two already, but you still nod. he adds another finger, deliciously stretching you out and giving you trouble breathing. it seems like hours have passed, and wooyoung is still content with fingering you at a pace that is too slow even for you. he is enjoying the sounds and view you are offering him, and is too mesmerized by the way he is so smoothly disappearing inside of you, all while you breathe heavily and buck your hips into his hand.
you feel your wrists become free. sore, but free. wooyoung then grabs something from the nightstand, and shuffles with it for a few moments. you hear light buzzing, and your heart jumps a little. fuck, he is doing everything just right. as if he entered your mind and stole all your wishes.
he brings it to your nipple, circling it just like his tongue is circling your clit. you are overwhelmed, struggling to keep still like he instructed.
"wooyoung-" you whine.
"i know, baby. feels so good, doesn't it?" he coos, sending shivers up your spine.
"yeah," you whine again, not quite capable of doing anything else.
"yeah," he hums. "you're doing a very good job, angel. hold on tight for me. don't let go just yet."
he is taking his sweet time, acting like this is only the beginning of a very long movie. you feel like cumming, and you don't want to do that just yet. you're having too much fun, and the buildup is much more pleasurable than the orgasm itself. at least you think so. his voice is soothing, low and raspy, and that alone is enough to make you feel like you came ten times already.
his tongue dives between your folds again, adding the third source of pleasure and shooting arrows to your core. you tremble under his passionate licks, thighs struggling to stay open. he hums into your clit, vibrations matching the ones on your nipple. he spins the gadget around your buds, slowly, then teases the areola again. you hear yourself become louder and louder, and he doesn't seem to mind. it's killing you that you can't see him. he must surely look gorgeous between your legs, working his tongue on you like it's his last feast.
his plush lips close around the tip of your clit, gently tugging it, tongue spinning it in slow circles just how you like it. but today, it all seems a little too slow. you are eager to see just how he will make you cum. maybe you can take two?
"how much longer?" you ask, feeling a bit stupid.
"oh, so much longer. i'm not letting go of you just yet."
the time is slow, and pleasure still bearable. you don't know how much longer you can hold. luckily, he pulls away from you, just in time. you feel his wet digits trail your bottom lip, as if asking permission to enter. you open your mouth, taking in the arousal that exists just for him. you taste yourself on his fingers, working your tongue around them so that you don't just lay completely useless. he hums, watching you swirl around them, and letting them go with a little suck at the end.
"i'm going to make you feel so good, princess. give you the best treatment you'll ever get."
you feel all fluttery and fidgety from his words. you could listen to him forever.
"come here."
you feel him sit behind you, back resting against the wall, and his hands pull you into his lap. your bare back rests against his built chest, and you can't help but hum at the sensation. he chuckles, loving every bit of reaction you have to give him.
"face reveal?" he reads a comment, and you become tense in his hands. "no."
the firm no has you grabbing his thighs, legs automatically spreading for him to continue abusing your clit and hole. his fingers move your hair out of the way of your chest, and gently tuck it behind your ears.
"so pretty." he coos again, leaving a kiss on top of your head.
you melt into his arms at his never ending praises, and you can't get enough. you wish to be called pretty all day long. you wish to be kissed like that for the rest of your life. you love how desired he makes you feel.
"are you real?" you mumble, lost in the soft vibrations that are circling your entrance.
he laughs, then kisses your shoulder. "very much, sweetheart."
"it feels too good. you feel too good."
"i know, baby. i know."
the gadget on your cunt is small, and still at a low speed. he uses his other hand to spread your folds, enough to start inserting the small vibrator inside. you yelp a little, the stretch wider than his fingers.
"easy," he whispers, "just like that..."
he fully inserts it, and you feel so full and in pain.
"i'm not going all the way, don't be afraid."
he pumps the toy in and out of you, enough to get you used to the new stretch. his other hand toys with your clit and tricks your brain into focusing on the pleasure rather than pain.
"wooyoung?"
"yes, love?"
"i thought you said you'd destroy me."
his movements stop. you bite your lip, trying to keep the smirk spreading on your lips. a gasp leaves your lips as his hand grabs your jaw, pulling your head back so that he can look at your face. he gets close, so close that your lips almost touch.
"is that what you want?"
his hot breath is so inviting, but when you reach to kiss him, he moves away, and grabs your jaw firmer.
"you want your tight little cunt to be destroyed? you want me to throw you around and use you like that toy you watched me fuck? you want me to fuck the feeling for the other guy out of you? so that you don't see nobody else but me? so that your pussy only fits on my cock? so that your body only responds to me?"
you are breathless as he spills all his intentions out, with each sentence sending goosebumps all over your body.
"that what you want? for me to fuck you dumb?"
"yes." you simply say.
you expected him to push you down on the bed. you expected him to pull your hair. you expected him to degrade you, spank you, and whatnot. but what you did not expect was the gentle tug of the blindfold, and a caress of your cheek as his grip on your jaw softened. you open your eyes, and meet his dark ones.
"are you sure?" he asks quietly.
"what?" you act dumb.
"you want me to...?"
"i want you to fuck me." you finally say it.
it seems like he has stopped breathing for a moment. he takes a few seconds to examine your face, looking for any signs of hesitation. when he sees none, he places the silk on your hands, tying them up and placing them in your lap.
"i meant what i said," he speaks to you and only you now, back turned towards the camera. "i am going to take a good care of you. remember your safety word?"
"mocha."
"good girl." he places a kiss on your forehead, then pushes you to lay down.
you watch him unbutton his pants, finally seeing more of that v-line you are suddenly very obsessed with. he throws them on the floor, along with the boxers, letting his cock free from the grip of the fabric. your jaw drops at the size. not enormous, but still too big for your virgin self. this is going to hurt like hell.
"can i suck you off?" you ask, subconsciously doing the big eyes thing he so much loves.
"are you sure? i wanted this to be about you."
"i'm sure." you say, eager to get a taste of him. "just, uh... guide me?"
"with pleasure."
he lays on the bed, elbow holding his upper body up as his other hand brings your face close to his cock. you didn't think it would look this clean and... pretty. you stick your tongue out, finally getting a taste of him. he hums, throwing his head back. you lick up from the base to the tip, immediately taking him in your mouth. he gasps, not expecting it so soon. he fills your mouth deliciously, resting against your tongue as his precum spills down your throat. he feels smooth, and very hot.
"god, so good," he groans, hand reaching for your hair to guide you up and down.
you bob your head up and down, too impatient to go slow like he did. you want to hear him more, knowing that you are the reason for those sounds and words.
"even your mouth is so tight, i might cum if you continue." he pulls your head away.
"you're so mean," you whine.
"i know," he coos for the third time today, knowing just what it does to you. "let me take care of you."
you try to lay down, but he holds you in place. you are confused. does he want to jump to some insane positions right away?
"missionary hurts. we will try something else. that good?"
you nod, and he sits against the wall again. he pulls you towards him, finally kissing you again. he showers you with soft kisses, and even though he promised whatnot, you are still experiencing a very soft and gentle version of him. you like it, but the thought of all the things he has listed for you is making your blood boil with excitement.
his hands cup your ass, raising your body and slowly bringing it towards his cock. you look down, noticing that a condom is already sitting on it. when did he manage to do that?
"slow," he whispers, guiding your hips so that you slowly start to sit on him, "just like that. good job."
you yelp at the uncomfortable stretch, and knowing that the pain is yet to come, you put your still tied hands around his neck and rest your head on his shoulder. inch by inch, he disappears inside of you, leaving no space empty. you feel so full and uncomfortable, your teeth sink into his shoulder to stop the loud moans of pain.
"hold onto me, love. it'll be better."
you forget the camera. you forget yunho. you forget san. you forget your feelings towards the other man. you will enjoy this, even if it was your last.
"can i move?"
"yes."
he keeps you close to him, lifting your hips slowly up and down. you hear the comment section flooding, and glance over at the laptop on the nightstand. each money donation makes a sound, and right now, there is tons of them. you enjoy all the praises written in the comments, talking about how well you are taking him, how obedient you are, and how innocent you look. you like it all a little too much.
wooyoung speeds up the pace, hips finally colliding with yours with a bigger force. you don't let go of his shoulder just yet, still focusing on the pleasure and trying to ignore the pain. he is a groaning mess, and little did you know that he has to use every ounce of self control in him to not just slam you on the bed and fuck you open for him. he grips your hips, sure to leave bruises afterwards, and keeps the same pace for a while.
"feeling okay?"
"yeah," you stutter between little gasps and moans.
"can i speed up?"
"yes, please."
the man finally lets himself loose, picking up your body by your waist and moving his own hips instead in a fast pace. your jaw drops, and your eyes roll back from the newfound point of pleasure. you are completely lost in his touch, scent and voice. he is grunting with each push, reaching deep inside of you and touching a particularly sensitive spot you didn't know you had.
"fuck, you're so wet." he hisses. “look how well you take me.”
having enough of the position, he finally throws you against the mattress, yet his gaze still has a hint of worry for you. when you smile, it's his sign to dive into your gardens again. the new position feels odd, and good in a new way. he reaches for a pillow, putting it under your hips for easier access, and finally fulfills his promise.
his hips dive into yours, colliding with force and awaking the orgasm inside of you. the pace isn't fast, it is just right. you have enough time to savour every delicious pump he delivers you.
"i want to cum so bad, please." you beg, feeling a bit overstimulated.
"just a little longer, hm?"
he speeds up the pace, grabbing your waist and practically slamming you against his cock, while his hips stay resting. you feel like that toy, being used like this. you can't help but develop a secret size kink, seeing how easily he is handling you and throwing your body around how he likes it. your eyes catch the gadget near him on the bed, and you grab it. his eyes are focused on the place you're connecting, admiring the view with scrunched eyebrows. he is so into it, that he doesn't even see you put the vibrating gadget on your clit. it is the sudden flood of comments again that makes him look away.
"chasing that orgasm like a thirsty little cumslut?"
you nod eagerly, focusing on the pool of pleasure threatening to spill over. a volcano waiting to erupt. a bottle of champagne waiting to pop.
"wooyoung-"
"go on, baby. i've tortured you enough."
you moan, grabbing his hand for support as you slowly reach the peak.
"cum on my cock like it's your last." he grunts.
it takes you over the edge. a river spilling over the highest cliffs, hitting hard against the pond and creating waves all the way to the shore. it is ripping through your body, and you swear you feel in in the ends of your hair and the tips of your toes. your back arches from the mattress, shaking as shock waves continue to exhaust your body. you are a moaning and whining mess, grabbing anything you can, from his arms and hair, to the mattress and pillows above your head.
"fuck, angel, i'm close too." he warns.
"use me," you whine, still in a hazy state. "use me like that fuck toy."
hearing you speak that way sends him over the edge too, fingers digging into the skin of your waist, and eyes rolling back as he moans and groans. his hips become sloppy, and you feel something warm spill inside of you. it takes a few more pumps for him to come down from his high, and when he is done, he lets himself fall on top of you.
he doesn't speak. doesn't move. just breathes and holds you in his embrace. you lay there for a while, trying to calm your breathing and come back to your senses. with a single tap on the keyboard, he shuts the live off, not even looking at it. he does it that often, he doesn't need to look.
his head finds peace in the space between your shoulder and neck, and his arms caress the place that is full of red marks from his hands. his breathing slows, and when you look down, you realize he has dozed off. you do too, holding him against your chest and replaying everything that just happened.
when you wake up, you see that the sky has gotten darker. you reach for the phone, checking the time so that you won't be late to your arrangement with yunho. but then, you see a notification just underneath the digits showing a young night.
a single message, with an attached screenshot of a very familiar room and familiar nude people.
yunho: i think i'm ready to let go. you've made it so much easier. goodbye.
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
@minimoniac @miriamxsworld @kodzukein @woomyteez @mulletdaddyjayjo @bae4choi @haatohwa @marvelahsobx @jxhnnyfav
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me-and-your-husband · 11 months
Text
body ink || e. williams
summary: you tattoo ellie's thigh. it's a bit of a compromising position, and it leads you down an unexpected road. female reader.
warnings: smut!, fingering (e receiving), oral (e receiving), tattoo guns, mentions of a needle, tattoos? finger sucking?? not beta read (i didn't even read tbis through once)
a/n: i've risen from the dead. lets chat, my inbox is open :)
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e.williams
Hey! I've gone thru your page and I love your work. Especially your big pieces, they're sick asf. I was wondering if you had any openings for July?
y/ntattoos
hi! i'm glad you like my work, thank you for the kind words! i've got a couple openings in july, when can you come in?
e.williams
I can come in whenever. I'll make time for it if I have to...I don't care when, as long as you're the one doing it haha
y/ntattoos
how does july 13th at 1pm sound?
e.williams
That works!
y/ntattoos
perfect. what are you looking to get done?
e.williams
I was looking to get something kind of floral but not super...soft, yk?
y/ntattoos
so not super feminine? like no roses?
e.williams
Yeah, exactly like that. I don't have a design in mind...I kind of wanted you to design it? I'll pay extra for it I don't mind, but I saw your other designs on your page and liked your style lol
y/ntattoos
okay, tell you what: i'll draw up a couple designs and send them your way before the appointment. sound okay?
e.williams
Yes! Perfect.
y/ntattoos
cool cool. i'll send you the quote once we choose a design. how big were you thinking? and where?
e.williams
I was thinking on my thigh...? I know some artists won't do thighs so if you're uncomfortable w that it's cool!
I was hoping to cover most of my thigh tho
y/ntattoos
haha dw about it. i'm fine with the thigh. trust me, i'm sure i've had weirder requests.
e.williams
Oh yeah? Like what?
y/ntattoos
had a guy a few weeks ago who wanted a full portrait of his grandma on his ass.
e.williams
Oh my goddd. Did you do it?
y/ntattoos
...
$300 is $300...
e.williams
At least I know you're cool with a thigh 😭
y/ntattoos
absolutely. well, i've got some more dms to answer but i'll get to drawing up your design asap. i'll be in touch, thanks ellie :)
e.williams
Sweet. Have a good one :)
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ellie walked into your tattoo shop about fifteen minutes early, to which the receptionist told her to take a seat as you were still finishing up with another client. "she shouldn't be too long."
you had reached out to ellie with five or six amazing designs, all of which she loved. she had such a hard time choosing between all of them, but you managed to rework her favourite parts of each design into one. you both finally came up with a tattoo design that she was obsessed with.
ellie half expected you to be a middle-aged woman with black lipstick and face tattoos, maybe even half of your head shaved and the other side bright pink. your page didn't feature any photos of yourself, just your work.
so when you came waltzing out from the studio and into the foyer, ellie thought you were the client.
"hey, your next client is here," jess said, gesturing to ellie in the chair by the entrance scrolling her phone.
"thanks, jess," you said before approaching ellie. "ellie?"
she looked up from her phone at you, completely startled by who was in front of her. a girl about her age, fucking gorgeous. there's no way you could've developed such skill in so little time.
"hi, yes, that's, uh, that's me," she said as she stood, shoving her phone in her pocket.
"nice to finally meet you," you said, holding your hand out for her to shake. her breath hitched slightly as she took yours.
"you too," she mumbled.
"i'll take you back into the studio now, i've just gotta wipe everything down from my last client." you started walking into the back and she followed you.
"cool, cool ," she said nervously.
this wasn't her first tattoo. she knew what it felt like. she wasn't sweating, stuttering, and shaking before she caught a glimpse of you.
her breath caught in her throat when she realized that you'd have to sit between her legs for most of the appointment.
she was so fucked.
she stood awkwardly playing with her fingers as you sanitized the tools and the chair, listening to you hum slightly to the music playing. she could hear the buzz of the tattoo gun from other artists in the space tattooing other clients.
in the back, an older man was tattooing a woman on the back of her knee. that had to hurt. next to them was a older woman tattooing a woman not much older than you two.
"alright, we're all set. i'm just gonna put this up," you said, unfolding one of those old-timey partitions that princesses change behind in the movies. "it's just to give us a bit of privacy, since you're getting tattooed in a bit more of an exposed place, you know?"
"oh yeah, that makes sense. thanks."
"don't thank me," you laughed. "okay, not to be too forward or anything, but if you brought shorts to change into, i'll give you a minute. if not, i'm cool with you just taking your pants off."
ellie laughed nervously, knowing it didn't even cross her mind to bring shorts. "take me out to dinner first, damn," she chuckled, starting to undo her belt buckle.
you pretended to occupy yourself with putting your gloves on and preparing your table as she took her pants and shoes off, leaving her in her black boxers, your mouth watering a little at her toned thighs.
"you can hop up on the chair when you're done. if you can just like, throw one leg over each side— yeah, like that. perfect."
ellie couldn't believe that she was borderline straddling a tattoo chair in her boxers right now. in front of you, especially. fuck.
without much warning, you slid your swivel chair almost between her legs.
"left or right?"
"uh, i write with my right hand, but i can do some things with my left?" she swallowed hard.
you laughed, "are you getting it on your left or right thigh?"
"oh, uh," god, she was an idiot. "left."
"cool. i'm gonna put the stencil on, then you can look in the mirror and see if you like it. 'kay?"
she nodded, watching you peel the film from the stencil, trying her hardest not to tense up when your soft fingers placed the stencil onto her milky skin, sending shivers straight to her centre.
when she looked at it in the mirror, she grinned, rotating her leg around to get a good look. "fuck, that's sick. i'd be content with just the stencil, you know."
you smiled at her through the mirror. "well hopefully you'll like it better once it's actually shaded."
once you had her back in the chair, you began prepping your gun. "okay, i know you've had a tattoo before, i saw that piece on your arm. so you know what to expect, right?"
"yeah. yeah, i'll be fine."
"okay. if you need a break, just let me know, kay? thighs can be sensitive." you switched the gun on.
"will do."
you began the outlining, humming to yourself over the buzz of the gun. she watched your face focused on the lines, keeping a steady hand.
"who did your arm piece?" you said as you wiped the ink away, making brief eye contact with her.
"oh, my ex-girlfriend did it. she bought a cheap tattoo gun when we were teenagers and i was her test subject i guess."
"cute," you said. "i was just curious." you went back to tattooing her thigh.
ex-girlfriend. that piqued your interest. i mean, it was kind of a given based on the fact that she was wearing boxers and looked like the idea of men repulsed her. and the way she took you in when she first saw you. like she was thirsty. and she was so fine, the way you could see her thigh clench and feel it under your fingers making you want to take her right behind that privacy partition.
"my ex let me tat her too. she was brave. let me do an entire leg sleeve my first time."
"oh?"
"yeah. it kind of ended badly though, so she probably regrets it."
ellie sighs, "that's the beauty of being into girls. they fuck you up."
"amen," you said, looking up at her again.
you made small talk as you worked. you found out that she was a university student studying astrophysics, that she works with her dad in the summer as a contractor to make some extra cash, that she teaches guitar throughout the school year, and that she's an artist herself (her media of choice being oil paints). she even told you that she missed work with her dad today specifically to come.
you quite enjoyed how she'd tilt her head back when you shaded some more painful areas, the cords in her neck more prominent and the column of her throat exposed.
four and a half hours later, the tattoo was finished, and you placed the second skin over her tattoo. you gave her all the aftercare instructions, going over the dos and don'ts. she held her breath when you didn't move your hand from her knee until you told her to go look at it in the mirror.
"holy fuck!?"
"...is that a good reaction or a bad reaction?"
"it's fucking amazing! jesus christ, that's so fucking cool. oh my god. you're amazing."
you blushed and thanked her as you watched her check it out in the mirror, inspecting it and gushing over how detailed it was.
she put her pants and shoes back on and you walked her out to reception.
"i've got this one, jess. take a smoke break," you said, smiling at your receptionist. she thanked you and scurried into the back room.
"alright ellie, that's $200."
"what? you quoted me at $350?"
you just smiled and looked at her, leaning forward against the counter. "pretty girl discount."
her face turned red as she took out her wallet and grinned. she counted out the money, laying $200 in cash against the counter.
"you gonna give the next client who walks through that door today a pretty girl discount, or is it just me?"
"actually, you're my last. and for the record, you're the first to get the discount."
she smiled and returned to her wallet, folding up more bills. after you put the money in the register, she leaned forward and tucked a stack of folded bills into the front pocket of your shirt, pulling you in close. "pretty girl tip."
you bit your lip as you looked at her. her eyes flicked between your eyes and your lips, finally deciding on your eyes. "you said i'm your last client, yeah?"
"yeah," you breathed.
"what're you doing after this, then?"
"well, a pretty girl hasn't asked me to go home with her yet, so i guess i'll probably pick up a coffee and—"
"come home with me?" she breathed, leaning in slightly. "please."
you giggled, "like i could say no to that."
tired of her teasing, her breath eternally fanning over your lips, you grabbed her and pulled her into you over the counter. your lips met and she groaned into the kiss, pulling away after a few seconds. she held her car keys up and shook them, "you ready, babe?"
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she had you pressed up against the wall as soon as she kicked her door shut behind her, hands all up in your hair, lips bruising against yours. you kissed her back fervently. your hand slid down to her core, feeling the wetness through her boxers and jeans. she whimpered into your open mouth at the feeling.
"fuck, you're so wet, ellie."
"then do something about it," she said, hiding her smirk in your neck as she sucked hickeys into it.
"then take me to your bed."
she led you to her room, closing and locking the door, just in case. you pushed her flannel from her shoulders and undid her belt buckle, undoing the buttons on her jeans and sliding them down her legs, being careful of her thigh. she groaned.
"this doesn't seem fair," she said, grabbing the bottom of your shirt and sliding it off. she slid your pants down your legs and threw them onto the floor. "that's better."
she laid on top of you, caging you in, undoing your bra and sucking on your tits, trailing kisses down to your stomach. "fuck, so beautiful," she groaned. 
you pressed your knee gently into her core, "still want me to take care of that?"
"fuck, yeah."
you flipped her over so her ass hung off the edge of the bed and you got on your knees on the carpeted floor. she propped herself up on your elbows, watching your every move.
you began running your finger over her covered core, soaked so good that your finger was covered in her wetness when you took it away, bringing it to your lips.
"please, fuck, i need more, take them off," she said, bucking her hips up.
you hummed, "but i'm enjoying myself, el."
"please, i need you so bad y/n."
"what do you need ellie? tell me."
"i need your fingers, your mouth, anything. i'll do anything. just need you," she begged, shame gone.
"you're lucky you're insanely hot."
you slid her boxers off, watching the strings of slick that connected her pussy to the fabric. you laid your head against the thigh that wasn't freshly tattooed, tracing your finger through her dripping core.
"open up for me, honey," you instructed, gently spreading her thighs further apart.
she let out the most guttural moan when your tongue finally slid through her folds, collecting her juices on your tongue. her hands found your hair and pulled gently, making you moan into her cunt.
you sucked her clit gently, sending waves of pleasure up her spine. when your middle finger slid into her entrance she tried to muffle her moan with the back of her hand, but you yanked it away. "wanna hear you, el. don't do that."
"fuck, you're too good. fuckkk."
"you almost there el? can feel you clenchin' around me," you said, sliding another finger in and returning your mouth to lapping at her folds, paying special attention to her bundle of nerves.
she hummed and nodded fervently. with every thrust in and out, you felt her clench around you, a small white ring forming around the base of your fingers.
"fuck, fuck! i'm gonna— ohhhhh god—!"
you lapped up all of her release that you could, only coming up for air once she had to push your head away from the overstimulation.
you wiped her release from your face with the back of your hand and brought your fingers to her lips, "open."
she grabbed your wrist and obeyed, swirling her tongue around your digits and closing her eyes. "see how good you taste?"
she released them with a 'pop'. "i bet you taste better."
"i seriously doubt that."
"you've been between my legs twice today. i think it's my turn to be between yours. take your panties off."
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permanent taglist:
@winters-fairy @idkwhattonamethisblogs
ellie taglist:
@chrry1ovr @milly-louise @dankpunks @starhrtz
@pedrobaby @urlocalgingersnap @wrendermedone @kissyslut @felsweb
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riemmetric · 5 months
Text
One frustrating thing about being a mathematician is that people who aren't into math heard that Einstein quote that's like "you haven't understood something unless you can explain it in layman's terms" and use it to mean "if it can't be explained to me in five minutes it's needlessly complicated, this person is a pretentious snob and academia is gatekeeping knowledge". And like everything in life, the matter of scientists not being able to/not caring to explain their work to people who aren't at the same level of expertise as them is a complex one that is worthy of being discussed, but here's the thing that you have to keep in mind if you haven't done math since high school:
the further you get into math, the more specialized your field becomes. You start working of puzzles that are small, but fit into a greater web of similar problems, like knitting a beautiful flower that's meant to be incorporated into a huge quilt. And all of math is build on top of each other, so you can't get to the most interesting, current math being discussed in the world without getting through the building blocks that are taught to you in elementary school, high school and the university.
You ask me to explain my thesis to you and I can tell you the title, but you won't know what the main words in it mean. And that's not because you are stupid, that's just because to learn that word you have to spend time learning a hundred others. I love math, it's my favourite thing in the universe and I always have time to talk about it, so if you want, we can sit down and I'll tell you everything you need to know to understand what I'm currently working on. You can ask me questions and I will reformulate, you can ask me to go over things again and I will oblige. With your permission, I will get a piece of paper and draw shapes and schemes to help us, but it won't take five minutes. It can't take just five minutes. That is a concession you will have to make if you truly want to learn.
(Unfortunately, I don't want to disclose the title of my thesis on tunglr dot hell, because it's super specific and I don't feel like doxxing myself. But I hope this resonates with some people. I work both in symplectic geometry and Riemannian geometry, and I have to say between the two Riemannian is a little bit easier to explain, because I can just talk about distances, but symplectic geometry or Lie groups... I'm afraid I just can't explain those in a sentence because they rely on people knowing what differentiation means, and that's not knowledge you necessarily retain if you work outside a stem field. Explaining that in a few sentences would eat up the whole five minutes).
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l4nd0n0rr1s · 5 months
Text
the chapter of charles | CL16
SUMMARY: in which charles leclerc falls in love with y/n the booktuber PAIRING: charles leclerc x fem!booktuber!reader AUTHOR'S NOTE: time for a little charles moment! LINKS: add yourself to my taglist here! REQUESTS ARE OPEN
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yourinstagram
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liked by y/n'sbookmark, fan385, charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend and 3,649 others
my next video is due to be posted tomorrow! swipe to the end to see a sneak peek of the books i've been reading to prepare myself to have this video's guest on 😉
view all 4,253 comments
yourbestfriend hands down my favourite upload of the year
fan452 THEY'RE TO DO WITH F1? OHHHH SHIT
y/n'sbookmark my two worlds of f1 and y/n colliding oh my god
norrispapaya do u guys see charles in the likes????!!!
yourusername
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tagged: charles_leclerc
liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, fan523, scuderiaferrari, norrisbabe and 39,424 others
a few of you managed to guess them, but this week i have formula 1 driver charles leclerc on the channel! i hope i've converted him into a bookworm ;) find the video link down below!
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charles_leclerc thank you for having me! it was a pleasure, who knew reading was actually fun!
⤷ yourusername reading has always been fun charlie.
⤷ lightleclerc THE NICKNAME?? OH THIS IS SERIOUS
norrisbabe they'd be a power couple, that's all i'm saying
CL16.updates
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tagged: charles_leclerc, yourusername
liked by user284, charlesmybae, lightleclerc, yourusername and 394,432 others
After his impressive win in Monza, Charles is seen blushing and getting shy after being asked about the YouTube video he appeared in with @yourusername
Leclerc was quoted saying "She's given me the reading bug, if I'm not driving then I'm reading, that's what gir- I mean friends do to you!"
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leclercbabe DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE LITTLE SLIP UP HE DID?
⤷ charlesmybae HE WAS 100% GOING TO SAY GIRLFRIEND ARE U KIDDING ME
fan434 he was so flustered bless him :(
yourusername
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liked by: fan394, leclercbabe, yourusernamefan, charles_leclerc and 43,172 others
being a booktuber and having to travel is the worst. how am i meant to choose what books to take??
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fan394 TRAVELLING? TO WHERE?
⤷ leclercbabe IT WOULDN'T BE THE MONACO GP BY ANY CHANCE WOULD IT Y/N?
charles_leclerc just let me buy you a kindle and take that
⤷ yourusername how d a r e you even suggest i use that monstrosity of an invention. physical books for life.
⤷ lightleclerc HE'S OFFERING TO BUY HER A KINDLE????? OH HES SO WHIPPED
charles_leclerc
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liked by: scuderiaferrari, yourusername, carlossainz, fan395, lightleclerc and 652,513 others
C'est pour cela que je suis fier d'être monégasque. Avec un merci spécial à mon porte-bonheur. Forza Ferrari Siempre
carlossainz Proud of you!
leclerc_pascale Les mots ne peuvent pas décrire à quel point je suis fier de toi
fan395 PORTE-BONHEUR? LUCKY CHARM???? WHO OR WHAT IS THE LUCKY CHARM
yourusername
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liked by: yourusernamefan, fan495, charles_leclerc and 395,239 others
feeling lucky 🏎️
fan395 Y/N??? ARE U THE PORTE-BONHEUR?
charles_leclerc better than the book?
⤷ yourusername hmm.. debatable
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any and all feedback is highly appreciated!
REQUESTS ARE OPEN!
add yourself to my taglist here
love lauren x
if your tag is not underlined, it means you have sent me the wrong username. please resend it!
TAGLIST: @dr3ln4ml @itscrzy @nichmeddar @chonkybonky @raizelchrysanderoctavius @panicsinvirgo @randombugg @ctrlyomomma @tbsloneely @lichterfee @mochimommy2002 @landosgirlxoxo @celesteblack08 @mickslover @d3kstar @nichmeddar @laur20a23 @ssprayberrythings @simsimpgoodoldsimp @iloveyou3000morgan @ateezseoenghwanot @cherry-piee @darleneslane @parislovesf1 @awhbigail @Nelly-belly @x-bubblegum-x @multixedmund @bunniparadise @flannelforthetoads @Kapsylia @isabellem2909 @riverxsq @zjpg @cixrosie @deephideoutmilkshade @samaibx @slutforsleeping @joyfullymulti @eviethetheatrefreak @jensonsonlybutton @illicitverstappen @andiehanson @hopelxssromxntic @celestialams @laiba26 @evie-119 @Yourrrrpurrrrfecf @cyberbl4de @theonlyadrienne @gh1239 @GWginnyweasley @noncannonships @ilahatesyou @Lan4Cha16stanley @ironmaiden1313 @caseket @scenesofobx @fangirl125reader @morenofilm @lilyalbon @kave18 @Enewi @Lan4Cha16stanley @deephideoutmilkshake
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whichcouldmeannothing · 6 months
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big big marvey fic rec list
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marvey is currently my most bookmarked ship, so trust me when i say i've been around the bend for marvey content. i have dug through a lot of it the past few months, so trust that these fics have been highly rated!
fics are loosely grouped, with the summary and my thoughts under the cut :3 no spoilers ofc bc i love you
MY PERSONAL FAVOURITES
A Specter-Ross Affair by @frivoloussuits (15k+, au)
“You ordered an ‘extra-hot, extra-wet cappuccino, single-origin, properly layered, to-go and ready five minutes ago to make up for your service speed or lack thereof.’” In which Mike is a barista, Rachel is a lawyer, and Harvey is paid excessive amounts of money to plan their joyous Christmas wedding.
"Love is just a particularly socially accepted form of fraud. It's a series of increasingly complex and fragile deceptions between two or more people, and, more alarmingly, between each participant and their own deluded subconscious."
i literally cannot recommend this fic enough. this might be my favourite read of the entire year, dead serious. this sounds fluffy but trust me, the pining and the angst go well like salt on a chocolate chip cookie: extremely decadent. everything about this fic goes insane and this should be your gateway drug into marvey, im so serious about this. READ IT. (weddingplanner!harvey)
of all the gin joints by @frivoloussuits (10k+, au)
Hanging around a neighborhood bar one night, Harvey befriends a guy named Mike after realizing they can both quote The Princess Bride on demand. In the law offices of Rand, Kaldor, Zane and Pearson, senior partner Harvey Specter takes on an unusual case, representing his managing partner's daughter as she divorces a Michael James Ross. Harvey sees no connection until it's far too late.
"They’re playing a virtuosic duet with inhuman ease, as if the intoxication has broken their boundaries and blurred them into a single entity."
this. obsessed with fics that really use the law in their plots, and this is a prime example. a lot of chemistry in this one that is described in a way that makes you jealous of the bond they share and there are still lines in this fic that i think about almost everyday but honestly, such a top-tier read. PLEASE PLEASE IF YOU LIKE SUFFERING ANF REALLY REALLY GOOD CHEMISTRY PLEASE
5U175 by Closer (26k, canon-adjacent)
Harvey sometimes moonlights as a Star Trek BNF. Mike might have an attitude problem on the internet. TiberiusGhost is strangely compelling, for a recluse who never goes to meetups, and Harvey's finding this kid Photohead vaguely familiar…
i know that the terminology in this one is hella old-school but trust me. as someone who doesnt read a lot of fandom fics, this fic has changed it all for me (also bc the author replied to my comment hehehe) stick with this fic because the way fandom weaves with the character development is absolutely delicious, i remember saying this in my og comment but this fic was written with love for fandom and you should definitely read it too!!! you'd absolutely love it! (also ben stans rise up ^^)
fics to sink your teeth into (20k+)
needs must by @melthemagpie (98k+, au)
When Grammy needs an upgrade in care, Mike knows that the usual one-off gig as a paid submissive won't be enough. He takes a job he's been refusing for a while - a long-term, full-time contract. He expects his client to be a sadistic asshole. He expects not to like it. He's wrong on both counts.
this is a fandom classic, every fic rec has this on the list (cw for dom/sub and prostitution, so if you're uncomfy please dont read) but i swear there are so many romantic moments in this one that make me swoon and the smut is very good, i usually tap out in long fics really quickly but this hooked me the whole way through twice. thats my ringing endorsement, READ THIS
Lobster and Other Catastrophes by @andthetardis (21k, canon-compliant)
After months of silence, Mike starts texting Harvey again out of the blue. Funny thing to do on his honeymoon, really.
BRO PLEASE. this was so good. angsty and pining-y enough even though it's mostly a text fic. text fics to me are more like comedic, but this one had substance and heart (and funny and enjoyable btw). pulls you in and really makes you want to stick it out and get to the beautiful ending <333 (harvey being soft is probably a category on its own :3)
The Game by @frivoloussuits (27k, hunger games au)
Harvey Specter and Donna Paulsen are efficient and elegant killers. They have trained since childhood, mentored personally by Jessica Pearson and marked for years as District 1's Tributes for the Hunger Games. Mike Ross is an orphan from District 12, a drug dealer, and an underage gambler. After years of scrutinizing the Hunger Games on TV to make savvy bets, he finds himself on the wrong side of the camera, now playing the odds just to survive. Harvey and Mike cannot, should not trust each other. Still, they strike a backroom deal.
"Because he’s clever and quick-thinking and he’s learned her main lesson well– don’t love anyone you wouldn’t be willing to see dead. Ideally, don’t love anyone at all."
I READ THIS WHEN I WAS REVISITING HUNGER GAMES AND OHHHHH THIS HAS THE ANGST. absolutely riveting. ths is the third fic im reccing from them bc i love frivoloussuits. i would die for them HHFSHFHKSDGDHFG i love the angst and the life-threatening situations that the hunger games provide and harvey as a career is correct. its just correct. everything here grips my soul
Disaster Stories by agatestones (22k, canon-compliant)
"Hold on," Mike asked, "you made Donna come into work in the middle of a blizzard?" "I don't make Donna do anything. Haven't you learned by now?" Harvey gave Mike a mean little smile, but under that was relief for anyone to see. "You, I can make come into the office in a blizzard."
reads like a novella to me, and it's really good!!! very episodic and you really feel like these are things that have happened in universe. its very slice of lifey and i reread it a lot as a comfort read, its like a big hug to me
Pizza and a Movie by Closer (30k+, au)
In an alternate universe, Harvey's still a lawyer but Mike's not a pot runner -- he's a deliveryman for Rollo's Pizza and Ribs, which happens to be Harvey's favorite pizza place. Once Harvey finds out his pizza guy is a genius, Mike's life takes a few turns he would not have expected...
i swear this is the most rom-commy fic marvey has to offer. i like aus that slap me in the face more with the alternate universe, but this is such a rom-com plot. fandom classic as well and it really reads like a hugh grant 90s movie and if thats not enough to pull you in idk what will tbh
Imprimatur by Closer (22k, au)
Mike was raised to believe Imprint was a life-changing event for those few lucky enough to experience it. Harvey was raised to believe it was a form of mental illness. When it actually happened, neither of them noticed.
this goes absolutely crazy. one of those fics where you read it and you almost want to throw your phone at the wall because the characters could make it so easy if they werent so stupid (but in a good way of course) but the way it was written, you feel the depth of the soulmate bond and why its so important (which a lot of soulmate aus forget to do loll) but goes down like an expensive and delicious dinner :)
afternoon reads (10k+)
Sony SRF-39FP by @frivoloussuits (11k+, canon-adjacent)
Anita Gibbs won’t settle for Mike, not when there are name partners within her reach. She offers only one deal– two years, no other charges against anyone else in the firm, as long as Harvey Specter turns himself in. And even as Donna and Jessica and Louis and Mike beg him not to, he jumps on the grenade. “Time to get busy living or get busy dying,” he remarks, and Mike gives a small chuckle. Then Harvey smirks, straightens his suit jacket, and strides into FCI Danbury.
“I can’t believe they’re trying to lock you in a box and forget about you,” Mike sighs as he leaves.
“Well, as long as you don’t forget me, I figure I’ll survive.”
“Maybe you haven’t noticed, but forgetting’s never been my strong suit.
cw for depersonalization and desc of solitary confinement, very very heavy but the way mike is there throughout everything makes my heart twinge. i really dont know how to describe this fic at all but its really good. it makes me cry a lot. also made me start listening to jazz which- uh
Here at the end of all things by @tattooedsiren (10k, au)
When he arrives at the Pearson Hardman building the lights are dimmed and the floor is deserted. His feet carry him to Harvey's office even though he expects it to be empty. Because Harvey probably fled the city via helicopter or teleporter or sheer force of will. But when he approaches the office he can see that Harvey is there. He has moved the couch so that it now faces the floor to ceiling windows and Mike silently sits beside Harvey, joins him in looking down at the chaos engulfing the city below. [Apocalypse AU]
I LOVE APOCALYPSE FICS UP UP UP badass!harvey makes me bark, but im a really big fan of people who find happiness in the worst circumstances and this fic does it so so so well. reminds me a lot of tlou episode like 2? the one with the strawberries. please this is what i revisit when i miss marvey and i dont have a lot of time because the world and the characters are jsut so delicious!!!
quick reads (1k+)
This Love is Silent by kim47 (8k, canon-compliant)
She should have known. She had known, that something was off, at least. She knew he was hiding something. She just never imagined it could be this. Despite Harvey's warnings, Mike tells Rachel the truth about everything. She's shocked, naturally, and more than a little angry, but she agrees to keep his secret, and even to date him. So when they break up, Harvey goes into damage-control mode.
RACHEL!! HELLO RACHEL!! im always up for smart and discerning rachel (this shows up in of all the gin joints too btw!!!) this runs realistic to me because it shows that rachelxmike arent some hopelessly wrong for each other couple, they have good and bad times. this feels more real to me than other fics bc its not like the world conspires for marvey to be apart, its just life. i know this makes it sound so sad, and it is, but trust me: this is really really really good i love this so much
an archive of harvey specter's expressions by @frivoloussuits (2k, canon-compliant)
Five old expressions that Mike rediscovers in new contexts once he and Harvey are (finally) together, and one that he sees for the first time. Alternatively titled “An Ode to Gabriel Macht’s Face.”
this was written for me. this is literally me. writing fic because gabriel macht is too pretty, like this fic is literally for me. a lot of peering at him to get this fic as masterfully written as it is, and i thank you author everyday for it. to me, this reads like it's been written with love and care and true adoration (Truly, like Mike)
Coffee-Cart Client Privilege by @frivoloussuits (7k, au)
Mike runs a coffee cart. The coffee cart.
"Why not? They're too big and dense to be a snack." So are you, Mike thinks, and yet.
IM SORRY I KEEP RECCING FRIVOLOUS SUITS THEYRE MY FAVOURITE WRITER IN THIS FANDOM HFBKABFDKHFBHKDSA this has the hand-wavy logic the show has itself but mike's internal monologue in this one is one of the best ive ever read and the way mike's integrated in the offices is just so well-done ahhhh
Objection by yeah its frivoloussuits again i feel bad tagging them like 7 times (2k, canon-adjacent)
When Mike announces he’s leaving, Harvey plans to hide the jagged pieces of his broken heart deep inside, where no one will ever find them. His heart would like to object.
BIGG fan of physical hurt/comfort!!!! also big fan of people absolutely freaking out in the hospital in fics, it makes me bounce of the wall!! very short but the angst and love really hits you quick and leaves you on the floor gasping for air. very good (also cant prove this but im very sure this is a scrubs reference.t hanks)
Excerpts From The Gospel of Harvey Specter, edited by Michael "Forever Awesome" Ross, 2011, 1st Ed, by @rcmclachlan (7k, canon compliant)
Mike can totally read people. Well, most people. Some people. Or maybe just Harvey, who's pretty much an open book.
this one's really funny! it doesent follow direct prose and instead plays a lot with the setting its in (where mike's a documenter of harvey) and its just so funny and adorable. has a lot of heart too, it isn't just crack or anything but you really feel everything mike does as he writes all this, read this!!1
One More Sleepless Night by @sal_si_puedes (9k, au)
Soul Bonds are one-sided – there’s usually mutual affection, but only one party feels the crippling need to be together as often as possible. If separated at length from their love, that party becomes crushed by longing, panic, and sheer hopelessness, and so it is illegal to forcibly keep Soulmates apart. Some days, Harvey Specter hates the Bond that skews his judgement and weakens his resolve, and he fears what would happen if anyone in his world ever discovers he is so compromised. He certainly never planned to disclose the Bond for the first time in the middle of Anita Gibbs’ office, in a last-ditch attempt to invalidate the deal sending Mike to prison.
HSDGFHSDKGHRLKGHK THIS FIC. i love fics that use more than just prose to tell their stories (see above fic) and this does my favourite thing that soulmate aus do, which is where they integrate in-universe explanations for the phenomenon. the amount of work and dedication put into this fic makes it absolutely sing and was absolutely lovely!!
also pspspsps
golden like the daffodils by @mini-mart (2k, canon-compliant)
Poetry holds meaning, for anyone who reads it. It obscures and dances around the literal and metaphorical, because it’s imbued with so much of something that it overflows out of any definition. It can make someone mad, or lovesick, or aroused, and the reactions would be absolutely warranted. Mike is poetry, to Harvey. - Harvey Specter could be a good politician, as he believes in pragmatism over poetry. He won't let his progress fall apart, won't let someone knock it down. And then someone unceremoniously cracks open a suitcase at his feet. Or: Harvey, pretty boys and poetry.
yeah yeah i wrote this yeah yeah self promo smth smth
there's a lot more that isn't here but i'll probably write a new one when i go for a deep dive through the ship tags again :3
^^ ao3 etiqutte applies! if you like the fic, kudos and comment and bookmark!! show your love! happy reading marveys! my gift to u :3
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vivwritesfics · 9 months
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Keep On Rolling - MV1
Chapter Two
Summary: Lando's best friend having feelings for anyone on the grid? Impossible, right? She worked with them, sharing her friendship with the grid with the world via the FormulaY/N youtube channel.
After film a video including... spicy water (alcohol), everything changes between her and a certain world champion. Good thing she hasn't had a crush on him since his F1 debut, right?
Right?
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Series Masterlist
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Just like the first video, Paddock Pals was a success. The video went up onto the FormulaY/N on the Monday after the Albert Park race day vlog. It was the second most popular video on her channel, with only the original Paddock Pals ahead of it. F1 Twitter loved it.
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Y/N already had her next few videos planned. The next video she had spung on a chosen few drivers and they were only happy to join in. That was how she found herself sitting in her hotel room, Max, Charles, Daniel, Lando, Alex, Oscar and Carlos surrounding her. James was in a chair opposite the group, notebook in his lap and camera in his hands.
“Hello everybody and welcome to the FormulaY/N channel,” said Y/N, holding her microphone up to her face. She sat in her hotel room, surrounded by seven Formula One drivers. She had Lando Norris on one side of her and Charles Leclerc on the other.
In front of them were tiny shot glasses and spirits. But, of course, to make any money on youtube, you couldn’t use the A word. Y/N had opted to call it spicy water to ensure she wouldn’t get demonetized.
“Cameraman James has been working through the night to put together a little game show for us. He’s collected some of your favourite Formula One quotes. All we have to do is guess who says what. You get it right, you get a point. You get it wrong…” Y/N picked up her shot glass. “You do one of these. Pretty much, we’re all going to be on the tipsy side by the time we’re finished.”
James turned the camera round to face him. “This started as a who said what game, but I went down a rabbit hole and its become so much more than that. We’ve got Formula One quiz questions, finish the quote, a sing along and more,” he said, holding his notebook up.
He turned the camera back to Y/N. While James had been explaining, she’d began to fill everybody’s shot glass with the… spicy water (which was really just vodka). “If everybody has their spicy water, we can begin,” she said and looked to James, shot glass in hand.
Clearing his throat, James kept his camera steady and looked at his notebook. “Okay, this first question is a who says what. Y/N and I were going to play the clips, but we decided that would be too easy for you all. So, I’ve got to read them out. Right, who said ‘Lando we can be world champions’?”
“Charles!” Y/N said instantly. Everybody else took a shot.
Charles, Lando and Alex pulled face. Everybody else tried to keep their cool, but it wasn’t going very well.
“Everybody ready for the next one?” Asked James as a shiver went down Oscars spine. “Right, who is the youngest driver on the grid?”
“Logan!” Shouted Oscar and Daniel.
“Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner,” said James. “Or, three winners. Everybody else, drink up.”
Y/N tipped her head back and threw her shot into her mouth. She swallowed, feeling the burn as it went down her throat. “Oh my God,” she cried and coughed.
“Hey, hey, hey! There’s still some in there.” Lando grabbed a hold of Y/N’s shot glass and tipped it to the side, revealing the dregs at the bottom. “Drink up, missy,” he said and passed the glass back to Y/N. Glaring at him, she tipped her head back once more and finished the shop.
“Next, who once said ‘He don’t fok smash my door’ and, for an extra point, who was this person talking about?”
“Guenther about K-Mag?” Asked Alex, sounding unsure.
James nodded his head. Everybody but Alex had their shots. “So, do we have to do a second one now? Or does Alex just get another point?”
Y/N thought for a moment. “How about you take a short or forfeit a point? If you have no points you can minus a point, but the moment you get one that brings you back up to zero,” she suggested.
Three people took the shots, the rest took the points.
The rest of the rounds went by rather quickly. Max got three points and Lando got four, leaving him the most sober out of everybody. Halfway through the video they had to pause. Some drivers went to the toilet, Lando and Max had to reposition things so that Lando was in the middle, hosting and Max was keeping Y/N upright. “Maybe no more for her,” he suggested.
“No! If I lose I have to drink! Those are the rules!” Y/N cried, her speech slurred. She was leaning against Max, her face pressed into his shoulder.
“Do we even keep filming?” Asked James. “It’s not fair to put her on the internet like this.”
Lando thought on it. He knew Y/N better than anybody; it was going to be his call. “She’d kill us if we didn’t get all the footage. When she’s not drunk or hungover she can look through the footage and decide what she wants to keep.”
“You’re the best Landooooooo,” she muttered and sat up straight.
When the game continued, Y/N was barely holding herself up. She had one more shot and that was it, she was finished. When Riccardo got the next question right, she reached for her glass, but Max took it from her before she had the chance.
After that, they cut the camera. Max moved her away from the rest of the group, to sit out of the view of the camera. Lando did her outro for her, but Max stayed sitting with her. He too was drunk, but nowhere near as drunk as Y/N.
After the video was filmed, the other drivers filed out of Y/N’s room. Lando helped put things away so she wouldn’t trip over them in the morning and put a glass of water and a pain killer on the bedside table.
“You coming?” He called to Max as he waited by the door.
Max was still with Y/N. “Uh, no. I’m going to make sure she gets to bed okay,” he said, wobbling ever so slightly on his feet. Lando raised his eyebrows but he took his leave, leaving Y/N in her hotel room with James and Max.
While James put away the camera and stuff (Max wasn’t watching), Max brought Y/N over to the bed. She wasn’t yet in her pyjamas, he realised. Max waited for James to leave the room before helping her into something more comfortable. If he was lucky (and he was always lucky), she wouldn’t remember this the next morning.
Once Max had forced her to have some water and had gotten her under the covers, he began walking towards the door. “Don’t leave me,” he heard her whisper. How could he say no to that? Max let the door close and walked back over to the bed. He sat himself on top of the sheets, a comfortable distance from Y/N. But that gap didn’t last for long. She rolled over in her sleep, rolling closer to Max.
***
"What the hell?" Mumbled a groggy Y/N as she sat up the next morning. Her bed wasn't empty, something she wasn't used to. To make matters worse, her head was pounding.
She looked up at the stranger in her bed and tried to think back to the night before. It could only have been one of the drivers, she realised, and relief flooded her.
And then dread settled in.
The still-sleeping driver rolled over in the bed. "Oh my god," Y/N whispered, trying not to wake him. Nobody quite prepares you on what to do when you wake up in bed with the current world champion.
He was on top of the sheets, at least. As far as Y/N knew, they didn't sleep together. On the table beside Max was an aspirin and water. She needed it, desperately. Her phone was beside it, but not the keycard to her room.
She had to wake him. "Max." She shook his shoulder, waking him up. "Max, where's my keycard?"
Max's eyes fluttered open. He muttered something in Dutch, the same panic washing over his face. He took a moment, just like Y/N had, to check his surroundings. Clothes still on, sleeping on top of the covers. Everything was fine.
He turned around, looking for the keycard. "I left it right here," He said, gesturing to the bedside table. Max passed her the water and aspirin and stood up. He quickly searched for her keycard, placed it back on the bedside table and went to leave the room.
Y/N had to text Lando about this. She'd spent the night sleeping in the same room as Max Verstappen - how could she not tell Lando about this?
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No, this was a conversation she was supposed to have in person. She had to find James, go over the footage from the previous night, and then speak to Lando. And maybe apologise to Max for the night before.
Y/N got up from the bed, slowly. She grabbed the water and aspirin from the bedside table and swallowed, willing her pounding headache to go away.
She hadn't been this hungover in a long time. The curtains hadn't been closed the night before and the light was hurting her eyes. She got dressed, put on her sunglasses and left the hotel room.
James’ room was just a few doors down. She walked slowly down the hall and knocked on his door. Leaning her burning forehead against the wall, she waited for James to open the door. When he did, Y/N let out a groan.
“Come on,” James said through a sigh and pulled her into the room. He sat her on the bed and got her another glass of water. “You sober enough to watch the footage from last night?” He asked and Y/N shook her head. But even that hurt. “What do you want then?”
She sucked in a breath. “What happened last night? With Max and I?”
“Oh, nothing,” James answered. “He got a little drunk, you got very drunk so he stayed to help you into bed. I left after that and I was assuming he did too. Now, I’m guessing that’s not the case.”
Y/N shook her head.
“You didn’t…” James touched his thumb to his finger and put another through the hole it created.
Y/N shook her head.
“Good. Then you’ve got nothing to worry about,” said James. “If I were you I’d sleep in until the hangover goes and then go out to dinner with my best friend, leaving my cameraman and editor to do his editing,” he said and walked Y/N over to his hotel room door.
Even with her hangover, Y/N didn’t want to go back to her room and do nothing. They were in Miami for the grand prix in a few days; there had to be something more to do than just sitting around.
Y/N aimlessly walked around the hotel. Lando had told her his room number and what floor he was on, but Y/N couldn’t remember. She just had to hope she found someone she recognised. Y/N went from floor to floor and down to the lobby. Nobody, nothing.
In the end she sat opposite the elevator in the plush, comfy lobby chairs. Magazines were beside her, but reading hurt her head.
She was only there for a few minutes before the elevator door opened and out stepped Charles Leclerc.
Taglist (Open): @sticksdoesart @eviethetheatrefreak @eugene-emt-roe @glai1023-blog @mqcherie
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breeyn · 7 months
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An essay rebutting the “bad writing” claims of s2 ofmd. Spoilers herein.
I’ll preface this with saying you’re obviously allowed to like and dislike whatever you want. I am in no way opposing that. And your reasons are your reasons. Have at. (Also - this is a collection of observations from the past few days, I’m not calling anyone out)
I AM going to rebut the idea that season two was poorly written and lost the spirit of what the show is about.
My favourite movie of all time is Empire Strikes Back. It’s been my favourite movie since I was four. I’m pretty sure it’s a fave of David Jenkins, too. He and Taika have made absolutely no attempt to hide their love of all things 80’s - Prince, the Princess Bride, Kate Bush, Star Wars, etc.
I have ancient video tapes (that I can’t play because who has a vcr) where Lucas is interviewed by Leonard Maltin? Malkin? I dunno. Who cares. Maltin asks him about the Star Wars (original trilogy) story arc. Lucas says “in act I, you introduce all the characters. In act II, you put them in a situation they can’t get out of, and in act III, they get out of it.”
That’s how it works. This is how stories and literary structures work.
Of course you’re not satisfied with season two. You’re not supposed to be.
The arguments I have read on why s2 loses the spirit of s1 is because no one heals. No one learns anything. No one moves forward properly. The person who makes the biggest move towards healing dies. The two main characters end the show doing the exact fucking thing they had promised themselves and each other they wouldn’t do. Our romantic lead still doesn’t understand his value or make any headway on addressing his tragic flaw. It makes no goddamn sense.
My gremlins in weird: it’s not supposed to. In Act 2, EVERYONE LOSES. This is how it goes.
I’ve read a lot of people saying “but this felt like a series finale, not a season finale.” We all know that outside politics play a part here, the strikes make everything precarious. I remember the last writers strike. It destroyed tv for fifteen years. Anyone remember Pushing Daisies? Some of y’all have never had your fave show cancelled with zero resolution for the characters and it shows.
Daddy J did us a kindness. He softened the blow of a tough season. After the brutal cliffhanger of s1, he gave us a little softness and hope. All those things you’re mad aren’t resolved? It’s because THE STORY ISN’T OVER.
No one on earth thinks “stuff all your trauma into a box and ignore it” is good advice. A way to actually live. This show did not have enough screen time to throw out dialogue for no reason. There was foreshadowing in s1 for s2, and there is foreshadowing for s3 in s2. This is a well-crafted story by very smart people who care very much for these characters. There is zero chance Frenchie explained the box in his head for no reason. The reason people have not resolved their trauma and growth is because they haven’t done it *yet*.
And friends - it’s not thinly veiled. They straight up fucking tell us what they’re doing.
Luke Skywalker spends the first two movies fucking up and desperately trying to prove himself and just generally being an idiot. Sound familiar? He ignores the lessons he is supposed to be learning to go off and do what he feels like doing, and loses fucking badly. At the end of Empire, Han is gone, Luke and Leia wave goodbye to the Falcon that has Lando and Chewy - the rest of their crew - aboard. Everyone has lost everything they care about. Vader is undefeated. Yoda is pissed. Nothing is resolved.
You see where I’m going?
If you think I’m stretching this too far, welp, when Ed tells Stede he loves him - the climax of the finale - Stede quotes Han fucking Solo. Like - *it’s right there*. The story structure. The reason everything is unresolved.
So yeah. They wave goodbye to their ship because they have wounds to heal (like Luke’s hand). The people aboard the ship have things to find. Ed and Stede have *not* learned their lesson about whims and how not to be like Anne and Mary. It’s not stupid that they’re doing the same thing, and it’s not pointless that we were shown Anne and Mary. It’s all relevant.
The resolution comes in Act 3. None of these people are done. The story is far, far from over. And just in case the studios want to be dicks about it, David Jenkins was lovely enough to not repeat my enduring heartbreak over Pushing Daisies.
Thank you, @davidjenks 🖤
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