Thinking about how people who only (or primarily) understand Mike’s arc through a “hes queer and coming to accept it / struggling with heteronormativity/will get his happy ending when he gets with Will” lens are missing at least half of what defines his arc in the wider context / themes of the show.
Forewarning: long post (& also maybe an unpopular opinion)
Even as a queer person myself, I know that his arc isn’t solely about embracing his queerness (though it’s inherently interlinked). In Mike, you have a character who is being radically challenged by both external circumstances and his own decisions through a journey away from all kinds of forced conformity (social, familial, romantic & heteronormative) and into someone self actualized enough to live how they want…while also being strong enough to accept that they made mistakes along the way. Someone who is learning to be brave enough to say “this is who I am, what I enjoy, and what/who I love…and while it took me a lot of time to figure it out, now I can exist in the world embracing that even though it will take consistently resisting the tendency to accommodate people who think it’s unacceptable.”
Like. Even from a time before puberty (see: S3) Mike wants a life that stands apart from what’s expected of him in every area, not just in choosing a romantic relationship with another guy. He wants to continue to be a nerd and “child at heart” even though something else is repeatedly demanded of him by everyone from his parents to El in his romantic relationship. He wants to be a writer and someone who takes those nerdy interests into his adult life (cue aggressive gesturing toward the duffers themselves) and grates against all that’s been constructed for him even when he’s not (yet) brave enough to challenge it directly. Mike liking boys/loving Will is just “the final nail in the coffin” of his social and societal nonconformity—not the first (or the last) aspect of what makes him different from Hawkins or the life he was made to believe would suit him best.
Even the fact that Mike has a desire to be “normal” comes from an insecurity and fear that choosing what he truly wants will lead to him being outcasted and losing the people he cares for entirely—which is partially motivated by his queerness yes, but that also has a basis in his general interests and personality…which becomes especially obvious when you realize we are repeatedly shown that he is punished/has his wishes ignored in all areas he doesn’t conform, even long before we get into a plot where it’s clearer he likes boys.
We see it in how his parents have already started to demand he put boundaries on the time he spends playing his “childhood games” the very first scene of season one, how they demand social acceptable emotions from him when Will is missing, and how Karen & Ted want him to give up toys in S2 when he’s showing signs of depression (because they think the issue is him growing up, not that he’s struggling with loss or guilt for what happened to El).
We see it in how his own father comments about taking his CA trip away from him after calling Hellfire being a group for “dropouts” in S4 (implying that he is failing on an academic and social level that matters to wheelers—and that Nancy is good at).
We even see it in the way everyone from his bullies to his own girlfriend threaten and take things away from him when he doesn’t conform to social expectations...from Troy telling him to jump off the cliff to save Dustin in S1 (as punishment for the one time Mike stands up for himself in the gymnasium) to El jumping straight into breaking up with him and spying on him when he doesn’t do exactly what she wants him to in Season 3.
All of these moments are critical to understanding Mike as a person because they show us that, even without addressing his queerness, Mike’s desire to conform to socialized expectations involves but is not solely about him moving out of heteronormativity—it’s about him moving against everything that WASP, patriarchal, heteronormative and capitalistic and performative “wholesome American” values…and how he is learning to move past the fear of what will happen if he steps outside the lines in general, even though he already knows he hates those standards.
Mike’s “coming of age” arc is about finding the strength to choose the “path less traveled” in all areas of his life—even when it means (potentially) losing the support of the people he cares about. It’s about starting from a place of privilege and becoming okay with being outcasted from it in a way your insecurities never let you be before (which is inherently different than Will, who has always been shown to have some kind of support not just for his queerness but his artistic endeavors as well). Mike’s lack of support is why he starts from a place of deep insecurity, yes—but it’s also why him learning power of choosing to be himself, even if it means “losing” people when he’s honest about who (& what) he is will be universally powerful.
You don’t need to be queer to understand the power of what it means to know you will be okay even if people leave you. You don’t need to be queer to understand the power of stepping outside social expectations or your family’s way of raising you. You don’t even need to be queer to understand the weight of breaking up with someone you were only with to satisfy what you thought you should do, rather than be with who you want to.
The power of being strong enough to overcome your insecurities in order to “step out of line” and live and love as you want to is universal, and a stunningly brave choice no matter what or why you chose to do so. The fact that Will will be there waiting to love him in that honesty with himself is beautiful, yes—but it’s not the only lesson to be learned for Mike’s character.
Mike starting out with everything the world (or, at least America) tells would make you happy, realizing he is not happy with those things and rejecting them knowing it might have consequences is what makes his arc powerful, because he is learning (exactly like his sister Nancy) to be brave enough to accept those consequences (which for him are getting dumped, and feeling like he’s being left behind by some of his friends) to follow his own heart.
Even though The Duffers aren’t writing this into a tragic ending (aka: he’s not going to die or be left alone, because the duffers writing is inherently designed ro champion the outcast), these are the things that have (and will) make him relatable even to an audience that doesn’t know queerness. Erasing the fact that his lesson is the bravery it takes to follow your heart solely to talk about him liking guys (even Will) is to undermine his humanity, and the lessons to be learned from him by even the most general an audience.
TL:DR - the heteronormative aspect of Mike’s character is not the sole or even inherent issue within Mike, though heteronormativity is inherently built into his struggle.
There are deep dives on how his arc is also about a war against toxic patriarchy, toxic masculinity, emphasis on capitalistic and academic accomplishments over artistic ones, and even conformist relationships (whether they’re queer or not) that should be explored for his character—and I for one like him too much not to move out of just “this boy is queer because xyz” and into “let’s talk about Mike in terms of the wider scope of his cultural context and upbringing.” 🤷🏽♀️😂
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[6]
SCREAMING
EXCUSE ME
EXCUSE ME?????
OK OK OK OK OK FULL CONFIRMATION: LAVA LAMP, SON OF CARDCAPTOR SAKURA AND SYAORAN LI
AND SHE TRADES HER STAR STAFF AWAY FOR THE TSUBASA PLOTLINE TO WORK????
I…
DOES SHE STILL HAVE THAT STAFF?
EXCUSE ME I NEED TO CATCH UP ON CLEAR CARD VERY BADLY
I suppose that could be a future event I haven't read yet
Oh my god if Lava Lamp Guy and his [redacted] are children of The Cardcaptor Sakura that means an absolute WILD family tree branching over 2 to 3 different manga.
Move over timeline chart I’m making a proper family tree of this lineage and it’s going to be so confusing
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Or, how an otherwise incredibly private man came out to the world because when I play-tested his first challenge he physically refused to flirt with women.
Kiss Me in Komorebi 🌹 New Save+
Below you'll find an explanation of why I'm starting this Challenge from the ground up, an apology for my former applicants, and the form to follow for your submissions! Thank you for indulging me for so long in my obsession with this blorbo of mine.
Why the plus? Because otomes will smack lil' plus signs on updated versions of their dating games, and I'm a dork.
Deadline for applications is April 1st! 🌸
Let's be real - I bit off a little more than I could chew the first time around! This new version of KMIK will feature gameplay-heavy storytelling with posed scenes in-between!
I want to make it up to the applicants who waited so long to see this Bachelor Challenge come to fruition, and I genuinely want Daniel to have a fair shot at meeting someone truly meant for him - so I'm opening twenty one slots: seven for my former Contestants (two of which are taken by Daithi Calloway and Josiah Bolton), seven for my former Outsiders, and seven slots for new sims! Of course, the final number will be decided by the number of slots filled!
These three houses will rotate group dates and challenges with Daniel as he whittles down the numbers. In-universe, Dan hates the spotlight of fame, and was an incredibly private man (bar his new cult following on SimTok) before being influenced to be the star of his own Bachelor Challenge by his (well-meaning) agent and siblings. He went into this in the hopes that the contracted work would mean he'd not have to worry about his mother's health bills or his nieces and nephews' college funds for a little while.
However, when he got actual applications in, pictures of real sims who had applied just for the chance to meet him, to fall in love with him... well, it gave him a cold shock of reality. After a period of radio silence, the studio released a statement that said Daniel was deeply sorry, but that he wanted to give this a fair shot, and that meant he'd have to be more open and honest about himself than he was ever comfortable being.
🌸 THE APPLICATION 🌸
Name:
Age: (lifestage and number, please)
Traits:
Aspiration:
- please feel free to include any fun facts about your sim that you'd like to list!
- i'm a dork and i love writing prompts based on the autonomous actions sims choose in-game. developing your sims' skills and likes will help them act more like themselves!
- i will be using height sliders when i can, so feel free to include your sim's height! (for posing/gameplay purposes)
Please tag your application with #kmikapp! 🌸
Though I am excited for this clean start, I do want to apologize to all of my former applicants - both for the time it took for me to go through the acceptance process, and the time it took you waiting for me to get back to my desktop... only to learn that the sims you made weren't even going to be used. Believe me, I am no stranger to the loss of a Challenge sim: and I hope that by offering you all an automatic spot in this new save, I can make it up to you a little!
The two existing male contestants (Daithi Calloway by @buglaur and Josiah Bolton by @retro-plasma) will remain in the competition, seeing as they were already written to participate as contestants. But given that I'm forgoing the Outsiders concept for the ease of the Bachelor Challenge format, I thought I would offer all of my Outsider applicants the chance to make contestants! As some of my former participants are inactive, I thought this was the best way to reach out - I am really going to be better about talking one-on-one, though.
ANYWAY, I'm so excited to go on this journey with Daniel, and I can only hope you guys are as eager to see what awaits us as I am! Thank you for reading this far - let's try this again, shall we? 🌹
@hauntedtrait @kawaiishitty @wastelandwhisperer @occultpuppy @gothoffspring @foxsimthings @king-tower @morrigan-sims @akitasimblr @wormsimblr @10000and1dreams
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Template by @juni38
Im going to be completely frank with you all... and admit that I read these options and wasn't sure how to take this chart,,, so uh. Under the cut is Another Version. I'd apologize but I've given you the option to keep scrolling ¯\_(・・)_/¯
(If you notice characters missing on Kim's side, I probably figured she doesn't know who they are lol)
For the record,,, if they *wanted* me to pull their hair-- *is shot several times before I can continue*
Uhh Matthew is here because I have been converted fully on he/him or enby lesbian Matthew I think. He lives in my brain rent free now, very gender. I'd pull his hair but also I think he mostly just deserves to have it played with nicely.
And Scott's here because 1) I enjoy trans Scott, 2) Kim Pine Brain Rot possibly, 3) idk he's like,, the exception. God damnit, I've fallen for the inexplicable Scott Pilgrim Effect. What the fuck--
I did think about doing this chart like everyone was actually applicable to my tastes, but even if they were I think the ones I didn't put up would have to fall on the caress side bc I just don't feel that way abt them lol.
Again, not to say that's the case for the gals over on that side,,, I just think I would want to be gentle w them shxkdjsdhbd with the exception for Lynette who probably deserves to have her hair pulled, but again I fear she would Hurt Me,,, but maybe in a fun way,,,
Anyway No One Look At Me....
(,, also,,, Ramona is so far over bc I think she would enjoy it,, otherwise she'd be closer to Kim in that section. Same thing w Roxie)
If anyone actually looks at this version, I'm not opposed to doing a version like this for Kim btw! Just ask for it so I feel like I'm not just Dropping This and scurrying away
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I love how I went “I’m gonna get things done today so all I have to do tomorrow is go to my doctors appointment and then chill out all day” and now I’m ripping the house apart trying to find the drill cause my dad decided to “clean” but his version of “cleaning” is just moving shit around and not telling anybody 🫠
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