#just kidding theyre always there at the same time every night

[gskycy]

five slugs of various sizes in my laundry room. family reunion ??

[our-lady-of-mcr]

yet again wondering when ill realize that certain people do not change and are always going to try to fuck me up ):

[tgcg]

this is my element (+ album)

asking me to pick my fave album is like asking an orphan matron to pick her favorite baby boy

thats some weird and cruel circumstances to put upon me i feel like it changes every damn week like a rota

i mean what if my beats misbehave and i gotta put 'em in time out i cant play permanent on that theyre too cute

but yknow what i can show you one thing thats been on my mind lately

===

so when i was a kid we had this skateboard vid by "element skateboards" on DVD

they were this skateboard kit slash apparel company that was all about progressivism and shit and they did these much lauded comp tapes of dudes riding around on their boards and doing the dopest of macho tricks on the shit

flipping it turnways

putting the rock in the house like a big man

we had some of their merch actually

===

so anyways the one we had back then was This Is My Element

released 2007

mostly clips from cali i think and i mean the camerawork is fucking insane on some of those shots

this is gonna sound lame as fuck but i prob spent so many cumulative hours just peelin through the footage and ogling the shit outta it

that framing was tight

===

so you may be asking yourself or me

dave you genuine dicksucker i asked about your fav album not your favorite sordid ass display of smooth dudes hardcore riding and grinding them boards in public dude you have a problem

ok well that wasnt a question first of all so jot that down

but anyways to THAT i say

listen to the music

the whole thing has an original soundtrack of ambient beats

got some abstract hip hop jams, got some more indie stuff, lots of acoustic sampling

HELLA underground

and basically every track minus one is done by sampler beast david p. madson AKA "odd nosdam"

dude is my hero seriously

he is the master of the beat machine i shit you not hes always been kinda my idol on this stuff

aside from bro obviously

===

obviously.

===

anyways he had an E-mu SP-1200 which is a really oldschool sampler invented by dave rossum in the late 80s

revolutionary to the hip hop scene

nosdam had this mega distinct sound to his music that i always wanted to replicate on my own beats

still do

i dont know for sure if he used it on T.I.M.E. but he uses some of the same samples from "vol. 9" which was exclusively SP-1200 so im gonna get a lil j’accuzi on that

it couldve been a boss dr sampler SP-202 though idk

he had one of those

===

so aside from beating the shit out of the pause/resume button to flip my whole cranium at the cinematography or whatever i would also kinda play it on loop to listen to the soundtrack and space out at 2am

the lonely broner seemed to free his mind at night

ok shit broner is good but i didnt mean it like that

that was goofy lets just keep movin

it was the only way i had to listen to it back then but i mean the video is 50 mins long so its basically just an odd nosdam album with accompanying ambient skater sounds and random expletives and whatever

random car sequence

yknow what i dont think people respect enough?

the dude who catches all the "mad stunts yo" on camera

i swear to god at least half the time hes ALSO on a board and that shit is bananas to me

bros gotta be on some whole other level of zen to skate good AND catch all them glamor shots of his fellow skater

thats like an express ticket to the ER imo

the ambulance is already on the scene watching you like an eager crow watches a half dead dog

===

ok gonna go ahead and lay it out flat

not great on a board myself

kinda dogshit at it actually

so maybe im not exactly an arbitrator of skateboard heinousness

but i always kinda liked watching THEM do it i mean who doesnt?

whats an even crazier layer to stack on the "dave" cake is

and dirk told me this because unfortunately it kinda happened post-2009

he would do all these collabs with one of my childhood favorite underground rappers david cohn aka serengeti

surrounded by daves left and right dude even before all the time travel horseshit

thats like

serendipitous as fuck i think!

===

if sburb was just a revolving door of artists called dave that i could bump fists with

instead of other mes in various states of aliveness tending toward extremely dead

i wouldve probably given it something higher than 2 stars on my TGN review

===

so yeah you ask me my favorite album its T.I.M.E. by odd nosdam i guess

bump that shit on a walk your mind will go places unknown to man

[s-4pphics]

scent of the pine. 1 (e.w.)

omg i finally wrote something who woulda thought gosh golly damn hey yall whos gay around here

wc;cw: 9.6k mmmm, sistersbestfriend!ellie, guitarist/producer!ellie, violinist!oc, so many time skips and theyre not even done yet omg, queer duh, all ocs r black coded<3, mentions of underage smoking/drinking(nics n weed obv), partying, making out, blood(it’s fake but still), all tlou kids appear including *gasp* cat, lots of ocs theyre gonna thrive in later chaps, depression, anxiety, disassociation, crack(it’s not all bad yall laugh a little!!), mentions of therapy, uh yeah just alot of sad and drama, smut in later chaps🤭🤭

You have always been surrounded by music. 

When you were born, your mother quieted your screams with song, holding you close to her chest and gently whispering words of affection and love into your ears while your three-year-old sister jumped in celebration for new life. 

When you were two, your mother gave you your first ever violin toy. Your sister had taken a large interest in the flute at age four, saying that the whistling noises sounded like birdies! and she wanted to give you the same exposure. It could have been sheer luck or her maternal instincts, but you quickly became attached to it. It was small and inexpensive and hardly sounded like a violin, but its bright lights and animated face near the scratched, poorly painted F-holes entranced you like no other. You couldn’t stop fiddling with the red, blue, and green buttons across the body, and every time it played the same robotic instrumental, you waved your arms around with the biggest smile on your face, like you could fly away from elation. Your sister would sometimes jump in and blow into her months old pink recorder while the instrumental played from your toy, imagining you were a part of a world-renowned orchestra: the musical harmony between the two of you brought your mother joy. 

When you turned three, your mom and sister invited over some of her friends to help make cupcakes topped with musical notes for your special day. You sat on the couch with your favorite toy in hand as the instrumental played, jumping up and down on the cushion from pure excitement. Your sister’s friends kept you entertained while your mother prepared dinner, banging together pots and pans with wooden spoons and dancing, imagining them as drums. All four of them made you laugh with jokes, sang to you—one of them even played a song on one of her miniature, bright green guitars— and allowed you to experience some of the joys of life through symphonic expression.

When you were four, your mother noticed differences in your behavior. She noted that you and your sister were polar opposites: she was outspoken, unapologetic, and animated, while you were shy, polite, and timid. You hardly ever spoke unless spoken to, and though no one around you judged you for it, your mother often wondered what went on in your head. Despite your lack of communication, she never doubted the fire inside you: she saw it in your eyes whenever you watched footage of some of the most famous names in the classical world play their hearts out. When you were five, she signed you up for violin lessons.

When your big sister turned eight, she and her friends' released screams of excitement when she revealed her very first flute. She jumped in excitement, —mostly out of relief that she wouldn't have to berate you and your mom with the shrilling bleats of her old, pink recorder— shrieking about how she and her friends should start a band as soon as possible.“How the hell would a trumpet player fit in a rock band, you idiot?” You remembered your sister's best friend, Ellie, saying quietly so your mother wouldn’t hear from the kitchen, earning a playful shove from Jesse, your next-door neighbor. The dark-haired girl, Dina—who lived two houses down and had a large obsession with slapping her mother’s keyboard in the middle of the night—bursted into a fit of giggles while pointing at the young boy, making him blush. 

You were always very observant of your sister's friends. You didn’t have many opportunities to make some of your own due to your incessant need to isolate, so you managed with what you had. They intrigued you: they were loud, lively, and exuberant. They never shied away from demonstrating their talents to you or your mom, especially the green-eyed, auburn-haired girl that almost always had her father’s black acoustic guitar strapped around her small frame on the three-block walk to your house. You remembered when she brought the guitar to school to play for the other students during lunch time, which landed her in after-school detention after she scolded one of her teachers for confiscating it, claiming that they were “limiting creative expression” and telling them to “screw themselves”. 

When Ellie’s father, Joel, came to pick up your sister's friends from her party, Ellie jokingly pinched your side and threw you a quick see ya, squirt! while her and her two friends laughed and waved their way out of your front door. Your face ran hot as you watched them—her—leave. You didn’t get to reply before they ran down your porch in a heap of giggles. Watch the road, nuggets! I don’t have life insurance! You remembered Joel calling out to them as they sprinted across the street. 

When you turned eight years old, your mother gave you your very first authentic violin and bow, the black case wrapped in glittery, floral paper. As usual, your sister and her friends grabbed and shook your shoulders out of excitement and anticipation of seeing you play since they never have, which you politely declined. You have always shied away from revealing your natural talent due to your scalding fear of embarrassment, resulting in only your mother and violin teacher knowing your abilities. You blushed as your sister, Jesse, and Dina pressed on, pleading that you play at least a couple of chords for them, causing Ellie to playfully come to your defense with a high-spirited squeal of she’s shy, you heathens! leave her be before I kick all your asses! 

From that moment on, you always looked up to Ellie and her comfortability with herself. You never thought that you would meet someone more confident than your sister, but Ellie had her beat for miles. Regardless of where she was or what she did, she moved with a confidence that you only dreamt of having at that age. You wanted so desperately to mimic her, but that annoying voice of doubt never failed to remind you of your place. You made sure your light was dimmed, always. 

When your sister was twelve, she began to take music very seriously. She went from two flute sessions a week to five, only to return home and play some more. She’d even performed in some of her school's recitals (she vomited across the stage during her first performance, but a victory is a victory). You watched your mother scold her about not completing her homework as she stood practicing in the living room while you silently ate your dinner, which led to her half-heartedly completing her assignments with a frown on her face. Over the next year and a half, your sister's scolding started to get more intense as her grades dropped. She was never much of a scholar, but she never let her grades slip under as much as they had then. Although her music teacher was sending her home with nothing but praises after every lesson, your mom often received letters in the mail from your sister's school saying that her performance was concerning. You’d heard your mother reprimand her countless times, saying you’re not going to survive high school like this! look at what you’re doing! while your sister claimed I know exactly what I’m doing, I want to be better! I’m following my dreams! why aren’t you proud of me? They had exchanged more harsh words until you heard your sister's door slam shut and your mothers silently resigned to her room in defeat. 

You heard your sister’s cries through your shared wall for a while, until a gentle voice—Ellie’s, you recognized—consoled her and told her to calm down until her whimpers silenced. You knew she had a habit of secretly climbing up into your sister's window to hang out when your mom didn’t allow company over, but you didn’t know that she also always showed up when your sister needed another source of comfort. You slowly got up and left your room, silently walking down the hall until you reached your sister's door. You wanted to knock and see if she was okay, but before you could do so, the door opened and out walked Ellie, clad in her usual dark jeans and T-shirt, bracelets covering her wrists in mass, and dirty, scuffed chucks and socks in hand. She jumped slightly when she witnessed someone waiting behind the door, but instantly relaxed when she realized it was you. 

“Hey, squirt. Why are you creepin’ behind the door like that?” She whispered with a small chuckle, gently shutting your sister’s door. 

“Sorry.” You whispered back. “I heard her crying and I wanted to check on her. How is she?” 

“She’ll be fine. She got a headache and fell asleep. I was just tucking her in, don’t worry.” She gently said, looking down at you. “I was just about to head out. Mind lockin’ the front door for me?” 

“Why don’t you just leave out the window again?” 

She snorted before she asked, “Dude, do you know how hard it is to climb down that rickety ass ladder you guys have outside? I almost broke my neck climbing down that thing in that storm last month.” 

You quietly laughed alongside her while she bent down to put her socks back on. “What are you doing up anyway? It’s late and you have class tomorrow.” 

“So do you.” You said, raising an accusatory brow at her. “Plus, I'm not tired, I’m bored.” 

“I’m not tired”, she said mockingly. “What do you wanna do right now?” 

“Don’t you have to be home soon?” 

She waited a second before a mischievous smirk creeped on her face, “Yeah, but who cares. C’mon.” 

She grabbed your wrist before quickly pulling you back into your room and gently shutting the door behind you. She took note of your room: pink and purple everything. Your walls were drenched in white and pink stripes with giant, iridescent, butterfly stickers, your bedspread had small specks of glitter sprinkled across it, which shimmered from your pink and green fairy lamp. You had a small tv propped up on your dresser, which was covered in fairy and Disney princess stickers, at the front of your room. She couldn’t help but snicker at the mountain of plushies that crowded your bed and nightstand. However, she halted when she noticed a small glass case that held two violins with their bows. She recognized the first one: a gift from your mother on your eighth birthday that had lost some shine, and another, much glossier and more tuned than the latter. It looked barely used. A small burst of joy exploded in her chest at the thought of you playing even though she had never seen it. She was happy to know that your love for music still lived. 

“Your room’s cute, dude, it’s making my skin crawl like crazy, holy fuck,” she said with a soft laugh, leaning back against your door. 

“Don’t make fun of me, you freakin' metalhead! It’s pretty in here and I like it,” you said begrudgingly, “Your room's scary!” 

She let out a loud laugh before she acknowledged your glass-guarded instruments, “You still play?” 

She nodded towards your protected instruments. You nodded from your bed and excitedly said, “Yeah, come sit! I never had a slumber party before!” 

You spent the night quietly watching Peter Pan, gossiping about how in love you were with him and how you wished you could fly. Ellie silently watched you talk with curious, wide eyes as you went on tangent after tangent. You talked about movies you loved and boys you liked (which she playfully gagged at), and music you liked to listen to when you were sad, and she internalized all of it. She had never seen this side of you before, but she was so intrigued that she didn’t notice her own intensity in her own eyes. You just kept going and going before you abruptly stopped, the brightness in your eyes dimming slightly as you looked at her. 

“Sorry for talking a lot,” you said, embarrassed. “Am I annoying?” 

“‘Course not, squirt,” she said confused, but immediately. “Why the hell would you think that?” 

You didn’t say anything, but her affirmation reignited the fire in your eyes as your rambles started up again. She let you talk until you sloppily fell asleep across your pillows and plushies, tv still quietly playing in the background. She gently got up from her position, careful not to wake you, pulled your blankets over your frame, and stealthily left through your sister’s window. She made her way back home, envisioning you playing your violin for her one day. 

Ellie became the person that you turned to whenever you needed reassurance. She’d never failed at making you feel acknowledged and seen and heard. 

Age thirteen was the first time you anticipated the summer. Middle school had been a very disconnected period for you, and though many of your peers had experienced a sense of helplessness through these trine times of adolescence, yours was slowly overtaking your ability to feel excitement for anything. You had become so detached to the world around you and that annoying, discouraging voice had only spurred on your distance. This dark state that you entered caused you to separate from everyone, including your own family. Your last day of eighth grade was the giddiest you had felt in a long time, and you couldn’t wait to get back to your place of solitude—home. 

Your sister entered her element in high school. Much to your mother’s delight, she was able to find a balance between fulfilling her dreams as a musical prodigy while staying afloat academically. 

You had been attending your violin lessons for eight years, and though you were blessed with your musical perception, —according to your teacher—you never played in front of an audience. Though your teacher was eager to put you in the children’s orchestra that he trained, your mother did not want to push you into something you weren’t ready for, so she'd always decline politely. 

In July, Dina invited you and your sister over to a pool party. Her parents were going to be out for the weekend, and she thought that it’d be the perfect time to be reckless. When you and your sister walked in with your towels and snacks in hand, she greeted you both with an excited squeal, beckoning you both to the backyard. Ellie, Dina’s older sister, Talia, and a few older girls that you didn’t recognize, were already in the water, splashing and laughing. 

“Look who just arrived, cunts! My babies, my angels, the lights of my life— “

“Ay, shut the fuck up!” the blonde-haired girl yelled with a grin, causing Dina to flip her off and the others to laugh. 

You modestly held your folded towel in your hand, smiling at their interaction. Your sister had already discarded her towel, shorts, and flip flops on a random beach chair before she cannonballed into the pool, causing everyone to swear and splash her. Dina then jumped in right behind her with a shout. They all blended so well, and you curled into yourself. Maybe you should go—

“Get over here, squirt! It’s hot as fuck out here,” Ellie shouted out with a smile, before a girl in a black bikini playfully jumped on her back, planting a light kiss on her shoulder. Something unfamiliar panged in your chest, but you nodded and slipped off your flip flops before making your way over to the pool stairs, slowly submerging yourself into the water. 

“You’re still calling her squirt like she’s four, cut it out already,” Dina called out with a snort before she addressed you.

“I’m not sure if your sister ever mentioned anything about these losers but they’re some friends from school, that’s Cat, Abby, and Riley,” she said and pointed them out, “and they’re really fucking annoying—

“Shut the hell up before I drown you,” said Abby with a straight face.

“Yeah, keep talking to me like that— “ 

“ANYWAYS,” Ellie interrupted, “We missed you kid, where ya been?” 

“Just at home, nothing crazy. I’m glad to finally be out, though.” I think I’m depressed, please don’t notice. 

“She’s lying, I nearly had to drag her ass outta bed by her feet to detangle her hair this morning,” your sister corrected with an over dramatic eye roll. 

“I’m just tired,” you said meekly. “School was hard these past two weeks.” 

“I bet it was! Literally no one ever talks about how crazy middle school is! I damn near backflipped off the stage at our promotion,” Riley commented with a head shake, making Abby aggressively nod her head in agreement. 

As the side conversations continued, your attention was overtaken by Ellie, who had moved to the opposite side of the pool to whisper something into the short-haired girl’s—Cat, who hasn’t acknowledged you yet—ear, which made her giggle and half-heartedly push Ellie away. The green-eyed girl didn’t budge, wrapping her arms around the girl's waist, pulling her closer and, much to your surprise, planting a quick kiss on her cheek. Cat had a tight grip on Ellie’s olive-green rash guard as she held her and shared soft whispers that you wished you heard. Was that her girlfriend? you thought. You knew Ellie liked girls due to her almost two-year long crush on Riley, which she confided in you and your sister about when she was fourteen. She had wildly knocked on your sister’s window in the middle of the night with a tear-stained face, frantically pacing and claiming that something was wrong with her. 

Why the fuck do I want to kiss her and hold her hand whenever I see her?

This is bad, this is really really bad, guys, something’s wrong! 

What do I do, how do I stop this! 

You had never seen her so defeated, and her wet cheeks and scared eyes made your chest hurt with a sharp stab. Your sister had pulled her into a tight hug and quietly hummed a tune in her ear to soothe her sobs, while you gently rubbed her back and told her that she was going to be okay. She ended up staying the night, dozing off while holding one of your sister’s stuffed animals close to her chest while the two of you held her from both sides. You and your sister hadn’t slept in the same bed since she was six. 

As the party slowly died down and Talia, who snuck away to her room much earlier, beckoned everyone inside with a get outta the pool you freaks! you’re gonna prune! from the back door, you all resigned inside to rinse off and change clothes before heading to the living room to watch a scary movie. You silently smacked on your sour gummy worms on the lone lounge chair as you watched Abby, Riley, and your sister cower behind pillows to block the screen while Dina snored loudly, while Cat and Ellie snuggled on a lounge chair. She had her chin propped up on the dark-haired girl’s head to see the screen while she rubbed her back. 

As the film progressed, you saw the couple making small movements out of the corner of your eye. Cat began to subtly plant soft kisses on her cheek, neck, and shoulder, causing the auburn-haired girl to smirk, moving her head to the side to give her more access. You saw Ellie pull her girlfriend’s shirt up slightly, rubbing the exposed skin on her hip. You seemed to be the only one who noticed as the girls on the other couch squealed at another jump scare. Ellie and her girlfriend shared a more intense kiss, and you saw a glistening tongue poke out. That made you avert your gaze and you blushed, embarrassed that you were catching such an intimate moment. You quickly got up with a quick excuse of I gotta pee, making your way to the bathroom down the hall. Your face was boiling, and your heart pounded in your chest as you soaked your hands with icy water before wiping them down your face, that voice in the back of your head asking what the fuck your problem was. 

You slowly looked up at your reflection in the mirror to center yourself, but your vision started to blur, and hands began to shake. You tried to take deep breaths; you tried you tried you tried but the air left your lungs as quickly as it entered. 

Breathe, breathe breathebreathebreathe—

You jumped at the soft knock on the bathroom door, and you ripped it open without hesitation, revealing a concerned Ellie, Dina, and sibling, reaching out and asking if you were okay. How long were you there? You couldn’t speak or breathe or see so you swiftly shook your head no nonono—

Ellie and your sister guided you back to the living room and onto the couch. Ellie squatted down to your eye level, grabbing your face in her warm hands while your sister rubbed your back and Dina held your hand. The other girls’ expressions had been pulled down in concern as they watched your smaller frame tremble. 

“Hey squirt, can you do me a favor? Can you breathe with me?” 

“Cmon, deep breath in and hold it with me, follow me okay?” Ellie instructed. Your mimicked breaths were choked and broken, but she nodded her head at you in encouragement anyway, gently whispering a that’s it every time you shakily exhaled. 

All the girls remained silent but attentive, allowing Ellie to control the situation. Riley had even gone to the kitchen to snag you a glass of water that she set on the coffee table. You tried to match Ellie’s breaths with yours, holding, in and out, holding, in and out, and you eventually calmed down. There was silence for a few minutes before Dina spoke. 

“How do you feel, hun? You okay to talk now?” she asked softly while gently caressing your hand. You didn’t know how to answer, so you meekly nodded your head yes. 

“Tell us what’s been going on with you. You’ve been so… MIA lately,” your friend noted, cringing slightly at her choice of words. 

“I… I don’t know what’s wrong, I don’t know what… what’s happening to me—

“Shh, it’s alright, we’re gonna handle it, just try to relax for now. We’re leaving in a little, anyway,” your sister comforted. You felt Ellie’s calloused fingers gently rub your knee soothingly. You just wanted to lay down. 

After some more hugs and forehead smooches from Dina, you and your sister packed up your things and headed home. You weren’t aware, but Ellie met your sister’s eyes with an intense gaze, quietly instructing her before you both left, (“You need to watch her tonight, do you understand? You watch her until tomorrow and you tell your mom what happened the second you get a chance”) which she immediately agreed to. 

Your sister had held your hand tightly as you both made your way to your front porch. Your sister pulled out her semiquaver keychain, unlocking the door and quietly trudged inside. Your home was dark, meaning that your mother had already been in bed. Your sister hadn’t released the tight grip of your hand the entire trek upstairs. She opened her bedroom door, silently pulling you inside and made her way over to her dresser. She gave you a giant T-shirt to change into as she put her bonnet on. You both brushed your teeth and washed your face before heading over to her bed. You laid down facing each other, tucked under the blankets. You both looked at each other in silence, but she broke it. 

“I want you to tell me why that happened, no bullshit.” 

You didn’t reply. You were tired. 

“Please tell me what’s wrong.” She pressed on. You noted the desperation in her eyes. Your heart was hurting. 

Silence.

Her eyes shut in defeat before she turned her back to you. Your eyes burned into the worn shirt she wore. Just say it, the voice in your head screamed at you, tell her how worthless you are! 

Silence. 

Silence.

Silence.

And then an exhale. 

“I think I need to talk to someone.” 

You did not expect the rest of your summer to be filled with therapy sessions and journal entries. When your sister told your mother about the events of that night, much to your dismay, she immediately made some phone calls and scheduled sessions twice a week. You had to pause your violin sessions for a few weeks, and you missed it, but you knew this was more important. Your mother expressed her remorse for not paying closer attention to your behavior. Your distance, your lack of energy, your reluctance to speak, your silence—God, your silence. You were screaming without a word. She felt that she’d failed you, and she wanted to do as much as she could to reignite that light in your eyes. 

You hadn’t looked forward to these meetings in the beginning, but you soon grew to like your therapist. Even though your feelings were confusing and unfamiliar to you, she was in no rush to get answers out of you. She allowed you to speak at your own pace and listened to every minor detail. She concluded that your self-doubt has bubbled over into anxiety: she recommended you journaling. She wanted you to document one thing that you loved about yourself everyday (“It can be anything: appearance, personality, talents. Whatever you wish. Just make sure you mean it”). 

And so, you did. 

The next month flew by, the last bits of summer slowly easing into fall, and you were going to start your first year of high school. Your mother and sister had noticed a slight change in your behavior during your break: you started eating dinner with them instead of in your room, asked how their day went, what their week looked like. Your sister would ramble about how stressed she was for her last year but also how excited she was to perform with the school’s orchestra at the December recital and, for the first time in what felt like forever, you rambled back. Your mother had listened from the kitchen as you two gossiped, argued, and even planned to play music together in the future. Her heart swelled. You also started hanging out with Dina, Ellie, Jesse, and your sister a lot more: one night, you followed them back to Joel and Ellie’s garage to watch them freestyle on some of his used instruments. Jesse, who babbled to you about his new love for drumming, demonstrated some techniques he had adapted from Joel on his old drum set while your sister nodded her head along to the beats he made. Dina was already improvising on their brand new sixty-one key keyboard, headphones on to tune out the noise the four of you were making. Ellie, who had stepped away to answer her girlfriend’s call, had her father’s bright green, electric bullet mustang strapped around her chest. She noticed you staring and sent you a thumbs up, you giving one back. She sent you a wink and a smile before turning away to continue her conversation. Your heartbeat increased. 

Ellie had become much more attentive after that night at the party. She had always been protective of you, but her desire to talk to you increased tenfold. She would text you fried memes in the middle of the night or leave voice memos about how her dad was helping her customize his old electric guitar. She chattered about wanting to record the entire process for all of you to see. 

i feel like if i help my dad with anything he’ll wring my neck :| he’s so particular abt instruments it’s annoying 

that sucks :( but at least he cares!! he’s just passionate and wants u to play the best. 

he gave it to ME tho. the guitar is mine now!! i should have some input on how it looks be on my side!!! >:/

i am!! just be patient with him. ur gonna be shredding w it soon enough :D

And she also never failed to check in on you for more serious matters, either. She never pressed for information, not wanting to overstep, but she always ensured that you had a safe space to discuss anything you wanted with her. After some of your meetings, you would already have a text from her asking how your session went and what you learned. You would send her voice memos about some of your therapist’s pointers about communication and how you were trying to improve that skill for your family, especially your mom. She also provided some advice about what helped her regain her footing in conversation, joking that no one could ever get me to shut the hell up at the end of the day! that’s for damn sure. 

Ellie wasn’t aware, but you started writing about her in your journal, as well. Small, little excerpts of what you liked about her and how she made you feel. How caring she was. How she made your heart beat fast whenever she was around. How strong she felt when she pulled you in for a tight hug while whispering about how she missed you—

Oh. 

Oh.

You were helpless… and gay. 

It was late into November. You were fourteen and elated. 

Not only had you slowly eased back into music, but you had friends. That you made on your own. You knew that your sister and her friends didn’t want to drag you along everywhere they went, both on and off campus, so you began to explore other paths by yourself. Swiftly after the school year started, you joined the campus orchestra, and while you were terrified, you were excited. Impassioned. Hopeful. 

There were all types of groups that passed through the practice room. Students of all grades hung out, ate, and studied there: you were shocked at the number of students that lounged in the designated nerd hotspot during their free time. This is nothing like the movies, you had thought. You noted that the room was not as busy on Thursdays during lunch, and you thought it would be a good time to tune out the outside world and throw yourself into music again. One Thursday, you walked in on a group of juniors whispering and giggling about something you couldn’t hear. You looked around and noticed one of the girls from your biology class—Arya, you remembered—pushed off into a corner by herself, on her knees and hurriedly shoving her things into her backpack. She looked upset. 

She looked sad. 

The juniors had been talking about her.

You had your violin case and lunch in hand as you slowly made your way past the juniors and in front of her. You noticed her tear-stained cheeks shining under the white light of the room as you got closer. You softly greeted her, making her jump and eyes harden. 

“Hey, Arya, you alright?” You whispered, squatting down to her level. 

“What do you think,” She whispered back harshly, continuing to shove her books into her pack. “Does it look like I’m alright? If you’re here to laugh you can honestly fuck off.” 

You’d flinched at her tone but pressed on. “I didn’t walk all the way here to laugh at you. Let's go somewhere else, we can eat together, if you want!” 

You could tell she had questioned your enthusiasm. She looked at you skeptically before looking behind you, at the juniors, and then back at you. You didn’t budge. She slowly rose to her feet, swung her backpack over her shoulder, grabbed her instrument case from the floor—hm, clarinet— and softly nodded. You both leaving caused the juniors to laugh harder. 

You didn’t care. 

You and Arya have done everything together since that day. She was eager to introduce you to her two friends, Starr and Kris, who you clicked with immediately. The second they sat you down, they raged about how much they hated the writers of Vampire Diaries due to how they treated Kat Graham, how they joked about hating talented people like you and Arya, what they wanted their future weddings to look like (Kris and her Pinterest boards), and you laughed. 

You were calm.

You were happy. 

Your first year of high school flew by. 

Your sister earned her flute solo at the December recital, earning a standing ovation from the audience of students and parents. You and your mother screamed the loudest for her. 

At Dina’s eighteenth birthday party, you, Ellie, and your sister walked in on her and Jesse tonguing each other down in the kitchen. Ellie let out a hardy laugh of are you fuckers serious! right in front of my salad? while your sister fell to the floor in hysterics. You had shielded your eyes. 

April came around and so did prom season. Your sister said that she had been anticipating the event since seventh grade and you, your mom, and Dina were dragged along to her fitting. She had texted Ellie to come, but she swiftly declined, claiming that she couldn’t hide my fat dick in a dress! love you tho! buy me an elf bar? :3

You missed her so much. 

On the evening of prom, your sister, Dina, Jesse, and Ellie all pitched in to rent a limo. Your sister, gorgeous as always, was draped in a strapless, floral gown that cinched her waist and bloomed at her hips and her twists were pinned up to show her neckline and back. Dina wore a flowy, black dress with a leg slit. Ellie and Jesse were dressed to a T in classic black suits, him in loafers and her in beat up Vans with her usual messy, low bun. 

Your parents had all met at Joel’s house for pictures and semi-alcoholic drinks. You were touching up your sister’s makeup at Ellie’s desk in her room when you felt too familiar hands pinch your sides with a soft, hey squirt. You jumped, almost mussing up your sister’s liner, causing her to kick the hell out of Ellie’s calf. She feigned an ache before hitting her mint elf bar, blowing it away from both of your faces. 

“Don’t fucking play with me right now bitch, I mean it, this is serious business,” your sister had said to her. 

“Oh shut the hell up, it’s three hours of musty people dancing, it’s not that serious,” Ellie said before turning to you, “Check your sister, dude.” 

“El, please shut up,” you said to her. “Just hold still, I'm almost done, god you’re both annoying!” 

You worked as quickly as you could, slightly smudging the liner on her waterline until you were satisfied, “…aaaand done. Tell me how it looks right quick.” 

She inspected her appearance, pressing on her baby hairs before turning and giving you a fat smooch, “Thank you baby! It’s perfect, now move, I gotta piss before we go.” 

Your sister jumped up from Ellie’s chair, holding her dress up while flipping her off and lightly sprinting down the hall to the bathroom, which left you both giggling.

A bored Ellie had made her way over to her bed while you worked, laid out across it, silently puffing on her nic before saying, “I don’t know how you deal with her sometimes.” 

“Me neither, honestly,” you replied, smiling. “Where’s Cat?” 

“Somewhere being annoying. We had an argument last night.” 

“Yikes, sorry I asked.” 

She sat up before shrugging, beckoning you to sit next to her in the bed, “You’re good. She felt a way about my promposal. She went off about me not putting that much effort into the sign I made and waiting until the last minute to ask. It was petty.” 

You snorted with a head shake as you watched her breathe menthol out her nose. 

“Don’t laugh at my shortcomings! Wait ‘til you get a boyfriend, he’s gonna forget about prom too! It’s dumb.” 

You froze. Boyfriend. Boyfriend? You laughed sheepishly with another shake of your head. She noticed your reaction before you could even reply. She smirked in acknowledgement. 

“… or partner. Your partner might forget.” She quietly corrected with a sly grin. 

“If you say anything I’ll strangle you and burn your corpse.” 

“Oh my fucking god, did you forget that I lived in the closet for almost five years straight?! You’re fine.” 

She took another puff before asking, “Anybody steal your heart yet?” 

“Please be serious, I haven’t even had my first kiss yet. How do you even talk to girls without dying?” You said with a pout. 

She almost fell over as she giggled. “You talk to girls like you talk to everyone else, you’re gonna charm them regardless. Trust me.” 

You felt your face heat up at the subtle compliment, but you gave her an eye roll and light shove before your sister came trucking down the hallway with her heels in hand. She shrieked out a limo’s here! before flying down the stairs. Ellie took one more long puff of her pale green vape before tucking it into her jacket pocket, wrapping her arms around your smaller frame as she guided you downstairs. 

She smelled like mint menthol and pine trees. You loved how she smelled. 

Summer came, and you’d fully accepted your big, fat crush on Ellie. 

Your journal had been riddled with doodles of her name surrounded by hearts and sparkles, written words of affection through poetry, more hearts and sparkles. You couldn’t stop thinking about her: everything that she said, everything she did, did something to you. But you didn’t know that the fluttering in your chest whenever she was around would be short lived. 

Your sister had spent her eighteenth birthday at Cat’s family lake house. As much as you wanted to be a fly on the wall and watch your sister go crazy, you had to settle with viewing her private story from your warm bed on Friday night. It was a mess: she had posted multiple snaps of Ellie, Dina, Jesse, and herself taking shot after shot, chug after chug, until she posted a photo of Jesse’s head hanging out of a second story window with Dina’s hand on his back and Ellie cheesing wide with her two thumbs up, nic in hand. Her next snap, however, made your smile drop from your face. 

The footage was a close—too close—up shot of Ellie and Cat making out against the wall. Ellie had her girlfriend trapped between her and the wood, both hands cradling her face as she dominated the kiss. She was grinding her hips up to meet the dark-haired girl’s, pressing her body further into the wall. Ellie then dropped her hands to her girlfriend’s hips, grabbing her short dress in her larger hands to pull her even closer. You barely noticed due to the shakiness of the camera, but you saw the pink glisten of your good friend's tongue swiping up into her girl's mouth before the snap ended. 

You'd nearly dropped your phone on your face. 

The clip had been hilarious out of context: the loud booming of clap clap clap that ass bitch, shake that cameltoe, lemme see them pussy lips! with your sister screaming and shaking like crazy in the background, Jesse behind the couple hurling his guts out of a window, and his concerned girlfriend pouting with a turquoise bong and lighter in her hand. Anyone would’ve found it comedic gold, but you? 

Your stomach had twisted uncomfortably, not only from jealousy, but from a burning, swirling heat. 

You dropped your phone on your bed and sat up as angry tears blurred your vision. You knew her and her girlfriend had been on and off for a while now, so why did it affect you so deeply to see them together? How stupid could you be? you thought she wanted you after all this time? a voice that you hadn’t heard in a while said to you. You’d recognized that tremor in your hands and pick-up of your heart, and you knew that you couldn’t be alone tonight. You sent a quick SOS text to your friends in the group chat, desperately seeking comfort. Arya, ever the angel, was the first to respond with a quick and simple omw rn, stealing her brother’s car keys to pick up Kris and Starr and flew straight to your house. 

The girls held you while you sobbed, gently shushing you and encouraging you to take deep breaths. 

Breathe with me, squirt, there ya go. 

You wished that voice didn’t sound so much like hers. 

Your sister and her friends had returned home Sunday night, hungover and exhausted like hell. You hadn’t moved from your bed all weekend, and you hadn’t wanted to get up to help her drag her bags in. You immediately recognized the laughter that came from downstairs, and your heart shook painfully in your chest. Their voices were muffled due to your door being shut, but you heard a cheerful I’ll go get her leave your sister’s mouth before the sound of her rushed footsteps flooded the quiet hallway. 

You quickly flipped over so your back faced the door, your blanket thrown over your body as you pretended to sleep. 

You heard your door open, some shuffling, before it was gently shut again. You listened to your sister shuffle back downstairs and you heard a faint she’s slumped…. tomorrow or something… 

Their chatter and laughter continued into the night while you moped in your room. Your phone had pinged around eleven, a pop-up of sleep well, squirt:3 on your home screen. 

You turned your phone off and threw it on your nightstand, shutting your eyes, praying for sleep to come. 

You dreamt of green and pine trees. 

You had begun your sophomore year, and your friends had been a good distraction from the inner turmoil of your heart. During the last bits of your vacation, Ellie had been texting you non-stop, eager to play you the completed version of a song she’d been working on for the past five months. She’d even finished customizing her father’s passed down electric guitar: you only knew because you frequently checked her Instagram, despite the ache you felt in your chest when you saw the posts of her and her girlfriend doing cute couple shit. Her guitar had been airbrushed raven black with silver strings, and a detailed white and green skull that she painted on the body. She’d sent you and your sister the entire video of her creation as promised, but you'd only replied with a dry thumbs up emoji. Her suspicions were correct: something serious was going on with you. 

After your sister’s birthday weekend in July, Ellie texted you multiple times to come help her and Dina mix a song and watch movies, but you politely declined saying that you were busy and maybe another time :)! It technically wasn’t a lie: your sister came to your defense when she asked where you were, saying that your trigonometry grade had dropped significantly after your first test, and you were desperate to get it up before your mother noticed. She had accepted that excuse for the first two weeks, but after your sixth reply of busy :( rain check? she got agitated. 

She started pressing your sister about your attitude after the first month without your knowledge, but she swiftly got brushed off with a dude, she's studying at her friend's house, can you relax and pack this bowl for me please? 

Ellie laid in her bed after her hotbox with her friends, confused as to why you were acting so stiff with her so suddenly. Whenever she came over to your house, you locked yourself in your room and didn’t come out to greet her for whatever reason. She had been this close to marching to your house and kicking your bedroom door down herself before she received a notification that you had updated your private story. She clicked it, and played a video of one of your friends with a flyswatter in hand yelling about how she was a world-renowned mosquito killer until the bug started flying around the unfamiliar room. Multiple shrieks, including yours, were heard before the video abruptly ended. 

Ellie swiped up on your story with a quick LOOOOOOL, but she wasn’t laughing. I guess she really was busy doing something, she thought. She felt bad for assuming that you had been purposefully avoiding her, but she was not used to you being unavailable. She was a clingy high, sue her. 

She clicked her phone off and hoped she would see you soon. 

Ellie’s eighteenth birthday had been two weeks away.

Her birthday never felt like her own; Her dad had always made a big deal about the celebration. He spent hours blowing up balloons for her eleventh, baking cupcakes(even though he nearly burned their entire house down) for her fourteenth, and bragged to the cashier at the vinyl shop about how much of an old soul his baby girl was(“Oh this isn’t for me, my daughter is obsessed with the oldies, I really rubbed off on her, she’s turning sixteen tomorrow and I wanna surprise her!”). She’d never complained, though. She’d never say, but she loved seeing him happy more than anything in the world.

However, her attitude towards her eighteenth birthday had been different. She was eager to celebrate her transition into adulthood with the people she loved the most. She knew that she wanted a slasher themed party with blood and gore everywhere. Her inner horror movie fan had been gasping for water for years, and she was finally going to quench her thirst. 

Call her Jason. 

You and your sister were arguing about who would dress up as Scream. 

Ellie had given your sister an invitation to her big eighteenth, and although you were reluctant about going, your guilt had slowly been gnawing at you. The last message that Ellie sent you was almost three weeks ago: a simple miss u, which you left unread. You thought it was strange how no one acknowledged the tension between the two of you, but you hardly understood it yourself, and you began to feel remorseful. 

You owed her an apology, and you planned to do it tonight. 

“You’re not dressing up as Scream, bitch, I’m sorry! I got you this Jack the Ripper cape, try it on.” she said as she threw the cape and top hat on your bed.  

“Jack the Ripper was racist, fact— “

“Most serial killers are! It’s for aesthetic purposes only! There’s no such thing as a moral compass on Halloween.” 

You stared at her with a blank expression, before she resigned, retrieving the fit, “Ugh, fine, go as one of the most iconic slashers in film history, see if I give a damn.” 

“Waaaaaa, you mad.” You said with a laugh. 

She yelled back a DUH! as she marched down the hall and into the bathroom to change. Your mom wasn’t supportive of the slasher costume party, but she stood no chance against your sister’s persuasive pout and googly eyes. 

An hour later, you both were dressed with your gifts in hand as your mother locked the door behind you. You couldn’t begin to imagine the reaction of your neighbors if they peeped out of their windows since Halloween wasn’t for another two weeks. They better not call the fucking cops, that's all I know! your sister shouted out into the quiet neighborhood before you shushed her. 

Despite the anxiety in the pit of your stomach, you were eager to see Ellie. You and your sister had pitched in to get custom-made, embroidered guitar pics as her gift: you were hoping that she liked them. 

It wasn’t long before you made it onto the Miller residence. Your sister scaled the stairs of their front porch like it was a mountain before banging on the door. It shot open seconds later and revealed Dina, dressed as Freddy Krueger, and Jesse as… Saw. 

That mask always made an uncomfortable shiver go down your spine. 

They both pulled you and your sister into tight hugs before pulling you further inside to shut the door. The entire downstairs area was lit with red LED lights with faux cobwebs spread across the kitchen and living room walls. You and your sister almost slipped on the fake blood that was splattered all over the wooden floor. There was a giant bowl of tooth-rotting chocolate and a bag of sour gummies on the counter, right next to the multitude of Jason figurines. There was also eerie music playing from Ellie’s speaker near the TV. 

You couldn’t believe you had a crush on this loser. 

“OH MY FUCKING GOD IM SO FUCKING EXCITED THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN HOLY SHIT— “ 

Your sister, then Dina, had already been trucking back up the stairs, as they released excited squeals, which only ignited more excited squeals from other voices you barely recognized. 

Jesse threw his arms around you as he pulled you inside. 

“Bro, where the fuck have you been, I haven’t seen you in ages!” He said, voice muffled under his mask and over the bass from the speakers.

“I know, I’m sorry, school is crazy right now, but I’m here now,” you said with a smile and just as muffled, walking over to the counter to rip open the sour gummy bag. “Are we supposed to be upstairs or something?” 

“Nah, Cat and Riley, you remember Riley, are finishing up their costumes. They really went all out with the decor though, I was impressed.” 

Your smile fell at the mention of her girlfriend, and you immediately knew that you weren’t going to have fun. You lifted your mask up to shove candied worms into your mouth in attempts to center yourself. 

After ten minutes of ravishing the tart candies on the kitchen barstool, you heard quick, heavy footsteps descend the stairs. 

You turned to see Ellie, Abby, Dina, Riley, Cat, and your sister descend the stairs, jumping excitedly at your get-up, laughing at your mask. You barely had the chance to stand from your seat and greet everyone before Ellie pushed past them to pull you into a rib-cracking hug. You could hardly move to return the gesture.

“I missed you so much, squirt, holy shit,” she whispered into your ear. You would’ve dropped to your knees if it wasn’t for her grip. “Where have you been, are you doing okay?” 

She pulled back slightly to look at your face while both your masks were atop your heads, and you got a good look at her freckled appearance. Her hair was styled in a half bun with multicolored bobby pins holding her bangs back. She was wearing light makeup: her nose and cheeks were gently highlighted, her under eyes had a dark red tinted liner that was smudged with purpose, and she shaved a slit into her eyebrow. She had on a black T-shirt that had been cut and ripped in some parts, black, ripped jeans, and an oversized, dark olive-green flannel. The sleeves were rolled up and you damn near fainted at the subtle lines of an unfinished tattoo peeking out. She also had a plastic version of Jason’s large, bloody machete secured through the belt loop of her jeans. 

Holy shit. 

Your face was burning hot from how close her face was to yours. “Hi El, I’m fine, happy birthday,” you said quietly, half chewing the worms in your mouth. 

You turned to grab her small, wrapped gift box off the counter, softly shoving it into her chest in attempts to distract her from pressing about your whereabouts, and though you noticed her eyebrows pull down in concern, she grabbed the box from your hands before replying a gentle thank you. 

Your sister slapped Ellie on the back, breaking up the moment, begging to change the music genre before dragging her to the living room to unlock her phone. 

I can’t shake ass to this shit, bitch! Change it now!

I NEED A ONE DANCE, GOT A HENNESSY IN MY HAND—

It was almost eleven. Everyone had migrated to the living room after Ellie finally turned off her summoning demons :0 playlist and allowed your sister to shuffle Spotify’s Top 40 from 2016. After Riley skipped every non-Rihanna song for the first thirty minutes, Abby snatched the phone from her hands and put Drake on. They both were on top of the couch, screaming into wooden spoons like they were microphones while Jesse, Dina, and your sister jokingly popped their backs. 

You had fallen back onto a lounge chair to catch your breath from the rigorous jumping you were doing, watching them all sing their lungs out. 

You had the opportunity to briefly speak to Abby, who dressed up as a bloody Esther, during Riley’s incessant song-skipping since you never had the chance to genuinely talk to her. She excitedly told you about how she and Riley had been best friends since fifth grade and they both met Ellie in middle school. She cringed when she reminisced on the memory of Ellie giving Riley a glitter-riddled macaroni card for Valentine’s Day in seventh grade. Abby and Riley both graduated a year before your sister and friends did and were sophomores at Boston University, her pursuing her hockey career and Riley studying neuroscience. 

The shrilling screams of Dina, Abby, and your sister when Single Ladies blasted through the speakers made you jump in your seat before you got up and made your way into the kitchen for water (and more gummies). Babe you’re not single! you heard Jesse yell to Dina. 

You stood at the counter chomping on the sweets, contemplating when would be the best time to speak to Ellie one-on-one. You'd seen her escape onto the back patio, probably to smoke, you thought. You had never been confrontational, and you didn’t want to say something you regretted like hi ellie i’ve been in love with you for years i’m so sorry for ignoring you and iloveyouiloveyou—

Yeah, you’d probably leave with a black eye from her girlfriend if you did that. Just say you're sorry, don’t be selfish, don’t ruin her birthday, don’t ruin her relationship, you thought. now or never. 

After your mental pep talk, you took a sip from your glass and shoved a handful of the candies in your mouth as a center. You made your way to the back door and onto the patio. Hot ass mask, you thought before ripping it off your head and tossing it onto the glass patio table. 

What you weren’t expecting to see was Cat and Ellie already outside having a conversation, and from where you were standing, it looked intense. 

“Why the fuck are you mad about me hugging her when I haven’t seen her in ages?” 

And you froze. 

“Ellie, if you can’t see that she has the biggest crush on you then you're actually delusional,” Cat spat back at her. “And that wasn’t just a regular hug either! You should’ve seen her face when you grabbed her, it looked like she was about to drop to her knees and propose!” 

They couldn’t see you from where you stood and it would’ve been in your best interest to flee before you passed out from embarrassment and loathing, but your feet had been glued to the ground and you were forced to listen to their harsh exchange. 

“First off, watch your mouth, I’m not fucking delusional,” the birthday girl heatedly said back. “And no she didn’t! And even if she did it doesn’t fucking matter. She's a fucking kid!” 

And you’d felt your heart plummet to your feet. 

The remainder of the candies in your mouth felt like sandpaper and you couldn’t swallow. You felt the all too familiar tremors of your hands start to pick up. 

“Listen,” you heard her tone soften. “I’m in love with you, okay? I love you, and I don’t want to be with anyone else. I don’t think about being with anyone else.” 

The sharp gasp you sucked in made both heads turn towards you in shock, and your teary eyes locked with wide, green ones. 

You wanted to fall through the floor and die. 

Cat scoffed and shook her head as if to say see what I mean before she puffed on her—Ellie’s—vape. 

Ellie’s call of your name snapped you out of your stupor, your feet moving before your brain could tell them to, clumsily shuffling your way back into your heartbreaker’s home, sliding the door shut with a loud slam. 

Everyone who’d been dancing jumped at the sound, turning to take in your ruffled state as their energetic smiles slowly dropped in concern. 

“What’s the matter, honey?” Dina said gently over the still loud music. 

Your sister called your name out with worry in her voice. You looked into her eyes with a head shake before you choked out a reply. 

“Can we… I wanna leave, please, now.” 

a/n: heyyyy lol so yeah thats that ig. if anyone even reads or sees this fic plss be nice to me ive never written anything like this b4. idk how long this will be but its def gonna be long,,, lots of ground 2 cover w this universe this game is everything 2 me and so is ellie so ye bye lolz

read pt 2 here :D

[desire-mona]

abed headcanons because im autistic and bitches be projecting

big fan of deep pressure, has a weighted blanket but ideally someones putting all their body weight on top of him

can drive but hates it because its FUCKING BORIIIIINNNGGG

doesn't have a very expansive music taste, when he likes a song he listens to it on loop for weeks

has received the same novelty popcorn bucket as a gift 10+ times bc his relatives have no idea what to give him and just google "gifts for movie lovers"

britta offered him an edible one (1) total time and he got so overstimulated he passed out and slept for 15 hours

has ARFID and there's a list of his safe foods on the fridge in the trobedison apartment

has very sweaty hands. like if you high five him it'll splash. troy is used to it (cuz they hold hands) but if anyone else finds out theyre like AH OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU DAMP

either loves or hates scott pilgrim vs. the world. i cant decide so neither can he.

reads the books that have movie adaptations bc dedication but doesn't have a great time

has a head jerk tic when he's cold (i have this too its very annoying)

"troy and abed in the mooooornin" vocal stim at random times

FFFFFUCKING LOVED trick or treating as a kid cuz the interactions were so cut and dry. "trick or treat" and "thank you". Perfect.

nobody is ever allowed to touch his feet. ever. under any circumstances.

lucid dreams basically every night but thinks thats just what Normal Dreaming is

got along very well with his teachers. "delight to have in class" energy

#1 sherpa hater, the most evil texture

always bites his nails bc the thought of long nails makes him wanna throw up

hate hate hates the smell of drool or saliva in general

compulsive hand washer, especially after touching a bad texture

has glasses but doesn't wear them. the feeling of anything on his face is Not Good

in the same vein, has a love hate relationship with headphones cuz they hurt his ears after a while

gets viscerally angry when someone says male gaze/ female gaze in reference to a real person. its a film term!!

has been told on many occasions that he has a "nice podcasting voice"

often pirates new movies because movie theatres are a nightmare but he will Pass Away if he hears spoilers

hhhhhhHHHHHAAAAAAATES opening gifts at parties cuz he has no idea how to react

shaves his legs bc if he feels hair against his pants he Will have a breakdown

wore the same pyjamas Every Single Night for a year as a kid

was a shorts year round kid in middle school

probably nonbinary but thats neither here nor there

[the-s1lly-corner]

May I please have a request of head cannons of TADC crew dealing with a clingy kid reader

Like two of them are basically plushies (Jax and Ragtha)

And please do take your time

TADC cast x clingy!kid!reader (platonic!)

YAHOO!! my back hurts but its okay because i drew my oc looking... (checks notes) "cunty" (doesnt know if theyre using the word right) anyways gonna knock out a few more requests; got that one friendship is witchcraft song playing on loop in my headphones so im typing like a speed demon rn RAAAAAAh

CAINE:

honestly hes probably the same with you, though like. with his eyes; he keeps an eye on you at all times. like i can easily caine being kind of negligent when it comes to kids and letting them get into harms way, but i also adore the idea of him fretting over you and trying to keep you safe. does not mind your clinginess, not one bit. always keeps close in IHAs, in fact we may even be able to joke that hes now a participant in his own games! he does it for both of your comforts, and to make sure you dont get hurt.. in cases where he cant be around, for whatever reason, he promotes bubble to babysitter to keep an eye on you; i think! reads you bedtime stories every night

POMNI:

i think i may have mentioned this a few times but pomni can get a little uncomfortable around kids; kids can be really wild and/or horrifically honest with no filter and pomni does not have the mental strength to cope, digital world or not/lh

with that being said it would take her a while to get used to you gravitating around her; i dont think she would tell you to leave her alone though. i mean, she tries to put herself in your shoes. shes losing her mind in this place and shes brand new and a grown woman. how is this effecting you? so she sticks around and just. embraces it, i think. probably checks in on you when you go to bed... kind of pauses when you ask her to stay, be it because you dont want her to go or because youre scared of monsters under the bed i think she would ultimately stay by your bed in a chair and watch over you

RAGATHA:

good news for hugging her, shes very soft thanks to the fact that shes literally a doll! honestly its rare that she would tell you to step aside so she can do something; plus like caine she generally likes to keep an eye on you to make sure youre not getting into trouble or danger,,, makes you plushies so you hang onto them when shes away and you miss her. like caine she also has a bedtime routine with you. maybe its because i just watched some adventure time today, but the ritual would be similar to sweet p's bedtime ritual (bedtime cheek kisses, tucking in, reassuring that youre loved ect ect ect) idk i just think ragatha would have that kind of energy when caring for a kid reader, clingy or not

holds

JAX:

one of the two characters who might get annoyed by your clinginess, especially in the beginning (oh boy i sure wonder who the other one is (looks at zooble)) and he might try to push you away and shoo you when you try to stick around him. might feel a little bad when he sees the sad look in your eyes when you turn away and walk away. jax, feeling bad for once? now thats rare

might try to bond with you by trying to teach you his ways of trickery; no one wants to see a kid sad, especially in a place like this and i dont think jax would be immune to your pouty face. older brother and little sibling dynamic, i think! i genuinely cannot see jax being fatherly, tbh

KINGER:

DAD KINGER DAD KINGER; do i need to say more? honestly kinger is very clingy himself with the people he cares about, given that hes lost so much he wants to make sure that those he cares about are still safe and sound. if anything, you might be the one asking him to dial it down a notch!/j

lets you snuggle up into him during bedtime stories, i think! like while the others who read to you would be sitting on a chair next to the bed, kinger would be close enough for you to lean into him if that makes sense. generally very sweet to you too, i think!

ZOOBLE:

the other one who would be a little annoyed by how clingy you are, again, especially in the beginning. zooble seems to really value their own personal time and space so its likely that they would try to set up a boundary; so you probably arent going to be able to spend every waking moment with them... that said i dont think they would exactly be... mean to you... like they dont hate you, they just tend to get irritated by small things! makes very clear communication, which is an important thing to learn! teaching moment! also cannot see them picking up a parental role, i can see them being the cool but angsty older sibling tbh. probably kind of freezes up when you hug them but does not push you away. does care deeply for you, just shows it in their own unique way

GANGLE:

oh you probably accidentally drag her around without fully meaning to! i mean im not sure how old the reader is, but lets say theyre on the younger side and they dont fully. mean to just drag gangle across the room. i mean its not like youre dragging her across the floor, at least! plus gangle is just so light, given that shes totally made of ribbon in the digital world. she doesnt really mind all the much, though... even if she did im not sure if she would speak up... lets you come and go into her room whenever, since sometimes you just miss her and she has enough trust in you not to mess with anything + sometimes you guys do arts and crafts together! yipee!

[dasketcherz]

do you have any dad michael son gregory headcanons because your art for them is genuinely so so cool like omg… it all looks so good they are so cute in your style

OH MY GOD I'M GLAD YOU ASKED HOLLUP [PULLS UP MY DAD MIKE/SON GREG HC LIST]

greg absolutely secretly looks up to mike's skill set as an artist. he loves to watch him doodle, mike is the type who'd feel conscious when someone watches him draw but,,, he grew to not mind and got use to greg watchin him draw. he can tell the kid is observing and absorbing what he can learn from simply watching him do art.

^^^ with that in mind, Mike often does catch Greg drawing too, when the lil guy is very proud of his work, he shows it off to him. Mike is very encouraging that he keeps up at it cuz he genuinely thinks the kid is doing great.

^^^ As i established in the previous ask, Greg loves to give art gifts to ppl he cares about. He does the same for Mike, especially in special occasions like father's day, or his birthday and whatnot. Mike displays them either in his room or by the fridge, he is very proud of his son's creative efforts!

Mike is not the best cook out there, you can hardly entrust the kitchen to him without him setting it on fire but he tries his best to do a decent job at making pulled pork recipes ever since he found out it's Greg's favorite.

Greg loves to collect all sorts of cute and silly plushies, anytime he spots any when they stroll across a shop or smth he's so ready to persuade Mike to let em buy it for him. It doesnt take a lot of effort to really, all he has to do is stare up at mike with puppy eyes and Mike knows the drill, he sighs and then painfully pulls out his wallet every time. it's worth it tho, it's for the kid

It's always like a russian roulette who wakes up earlier than who in the morning. Sometimes its Mike, sometimes its Greg. Mike usually preps breakfast, well...as best as he could perform the basics. He's shown the ropes to Greg at some point cuz even tho Greg's a kid, Mike acknowledges that he's capable. Greg's a fast learner, if he does a specific task so often enough, he gets good at it eventually. Its a lil funny tho cuz Greg almost does breakfast better than Mike at times. Greg has some fun making Mike's morning coffee for him, he appreciates it a lot. He thinks it's really sweet, he always affectionately ruffle Greg's morning bed hair as a gesture of thanks.

They have a swear jar in the household. No further elaboration needed i think.

Mike drives a motorcycle bike that used to be owned by his mom. Every time he tells Greg he's headin off somewhere for a quick errand, the lil guy insist he wanna come along solely cuz he wanna ride the bike as well. He enjoys being on the bike, he thinks its hella cool and he feels like flyin, he has to always promise Mike he'll behave just so he lets him come too.

They absolutely love movie nights as a hang out time. They both love watching movies, they just have a good time checkin out any film that peaks their interest. Having fun lil discussion bout it during or after watching and all that. Mike is amused when Greg has a lot to say, he just lets the lil guy share his thoughts bout it.

Whenever Mike gets a call that Greg got into another fight at school and it's often cuz other kid bullies got in Greg's nerve [especially if it's them insulting his guardian to his face] or cuz he tried to defend other kids from being bullied, Mike is so ready to throw hands with said kid bully's parents to defend Greg back. Theyre always on each other's side first and foremost.

When one of them catch the other still up in the middle of the night, the instant thought they have is "cant sleep?" presumably cuz the other most likely had another nightmare. It has happened so frequent, they just came to understand that tryin to pass the time doin other things is often the other best thing they can do to doze back to sleep. They had done plenty of things to pass the time at moments like it : be it watch another movie, draw together, just stargaze outside by the front porch etc etc. They appreciate the other for keepin them company. They've grown to try makin sure they never feel so alone anymore the best they can, cuz they arent anymore when they have each other.

[arroganceisherfavoritecolor]

Enjoy the silence

Carl and reader have a moment while on the job...

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*Reader uses fem pronouns, mentions of past bullying, reader is insecure✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

It had been a long day for you and your friends in Alexandria. You had been on a run since early in the morning, having to leave at sunrise due to the long drive out to a city to look for some supplies. You had all gotten back by the time the sun was almost completely out of sight, thankfully. You were all hoping to get home, shower and knock out as soon as possible. But of course, you and your best friend, Carl, were the two people Deanna had ordered to keep watch.

Now usually, you despised having to be on watch duty. You found it boring and agonizingly long, and what made it worse was the fact that there was no chance of sleeping till the next day. But when you did it with Carl, it was a whole different story. Carl always found a way to make the night more interesting, whether it be his funny dad-jokes or the gossip he would hear around Alexandria. In other words, Carl made everything so, so much better. Although it had only been about a year since you first met him, he felt like home. He surrounded you with a warm feeling, you knew that no matter what, you could go to him and you'd feel okay. As you were deep into your thoughts, you heard footsteps coming from the ladder. You looked to the right and saw Carl making his way up. Your heart lit up and you felt that feeling of warmth wash over you. You smiled at Carl involuntarily, just looking at him made you feel happy. "Hey [Name]." His voice sounded like music to your ears, better than any tune or beat you've heard in your life. "Hi Carl." He stood next to you. You and Carl were almost touching shoulders, since the towers small box-like frame didn't provide the most space. You began to converse with him, talking about how the day went. Every few minutes, either you or Carl would see a walker and shoot it down and then go back to your conversation.

It had been 3 hours of you and him talking. The time flew by like seconds. This was another thing you liked about Carl, it was the way you could talk to him for hours and never get bored. At some point, you had brought up how at one of the recent parties, some older women in Alexandria began to make snarky comments towards you. They said things about how your hair looked ragged and your skin was dull. You'd think that when in the middle of a zombie outbreak, they'd have much better things to worry about. "The old-heads gave me shit about my skin and hair again" you said with a slight chuckle, you didn't want Carl to think you were a sensitive crybaby. "tch, dont even pay attention to them [Name], they're just jealous because theyre all old and wrinkly." You laughed at Carls remark. "Its okay, I dont really mind. I remember in school, before the outbreak, kids would pick on me for the same shit." Carls once relaxed aura turned curious. "What would they say exactly?" He asked politely, not wanting to intrude.

"Well, it was usually about my face or my weight. It used to make me really upset, to the point where i'd beg my mom to not take me to school. But after a little while, I learned not to care . Besides, growing up with mostly skinny and pretty friends kind of toughens you up." You tried smiling at Carl and looking him in the eyes to show you werent sad. "What do you mean?" He asked. "A lot of my friends would have all the boys chasing after them, even in Kindergarten. Think of it like how Enid gets treated by every other teen here. Since I wasnt ever really the cute type, i'd just watch from the side." You smiled again, but this time avoided eye contact. "Wait, so youre saying that NO boys had crushes on YOU?" He emphasized on the "you" part. "I mean... I guess?" You shrugged while grinning. Carls face was twisted in a confused expression. "Why are you looking at me like that Grimes?" You laughed out. "I just find it hard to believe that no one ever 'like-liked' you." You tilted your head to the side, brows furrowed in confusion as to what he was gonna say. "Youre just so... perfect. Youre smart, funny, beautiful... and you can beat some zombie ass." You giggled, feeling a blush creep up on your face. "You think i'm beautiful, Carl?" You asked him shyly, afraid of sounding conceited or selfish. "Of course I do [Name]." He said.

He turned his head all the way in your direction, wanting a perfect view of you. He looked so handsome in this moment. His sheriffs hat was on top of his soft brown hair. His flannel was unbuttoned half way, his white t-shirt peeking through. The sleeves of the flannel were rolled up to his forearm. His hands were behind his back, slender and tall frame leaning against the wooden post of the watch tower. His face was illuminated by the soft glowing oil lamp that sat on the chair in front of you two. His diamond-like eye and ghostly pale skin looked so pretty in the mixture of the warm light of the lamp and the cold light of the moon. You felt your heart rate spike, your pupils dilated. He looked so kissable, all you wanted to do was grab him by the shoulders and kiss his lips til you were both breathless. Carl could say the same for you, as your (eye color) eyes and (skin color) skin looked gorgeous in the light of the lamp and moon. Your slightly tattered tank top hugged your curves and your low-waisted ripped black jeans did as well, exposing a small portion of your mid drift. Carl noticed your cheeks were rosy and your eyes were glossy. Your lips were slightly parted due to the impact of Carl calling you beautiful.

He fixed his posture, standing all the way up and walked towards you. It only took about 1 or 2 steps for him to be face to face with you. He tilted his head downwards, making eye contact. (eye color) eyes gazing into his, you felt the warm feelings 10x. He touched your (hair color) hair, twirling it in his fingers. His hands went from your hair to your cheek, cupping it. He stroked his thumb against your soft skin, feeling the heat. 'So much for dull skin and hair' Carl thought to himself, cursing those old hags for making his love feel bad. "Carl.." You finally spoke out, your voice nothing but a low whisper. From this angle, Carls face was no longer in view of the lamp. The only lighting you got was from the moon, directly shining down on you and him. You took each other's features in, not once breaking contact from eachother. Carl closed his eye, slowly began to lean in, and kissed you. His pink lips were soft, the feeling of the kiss was like satin bed sheets and velvety pillows. He put his other hand on your other cheek, guiding you to be impossibly closer to him. You felt fireworks go off in your brain and stomach. The moment you had waited so long for had finally happened. You deepened the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck. You could feel Carls tongue slip inside of your mouth, the feeling so foreign and yet so good. You slowly broke away from the kiss face hotter than ever. You and Carl stood there, trying to process what had just happened. After a few 30 seconds, you both began laughing from the overwhelming feeling of happiness. For the rest of the night, you held each other, enjoying the silence.

"All I ever wanted

All I ever needed

Is here in my arms" - Enjoy the Silence, Depeche Mode

A/N: I have wanted to write for Carl for the longesttt time !! I hope u guys liked it pls request more stufffff ;3

[freakshowtwopointoh]

All Bets Are Off

@pinkcrocss suggested this and i had to

“I don’t think the two of you could be closer to each other unless you were literally in each other's skin.” Andre teased, watching as Marie and Jordan readjusted their limbs once more.

“We’re not trying to get closer, we’re trying to get comfortable. The human body is a burden.” Jordan complained, shifting Marie’s body slightly to a better position.

“The two of you are essentially attached at the hip, I’m surprised your brains and bodies haven’t merged together.” Emma added. “You’re lucky I like you, Jordan. Considering you basically stole my best friend and roommate.” That got her a stuffed turtle thrown at her head. “Hey!”

“We’re not that clingy.” Marie protested, but it was such a boldfaced lie that the entire room burst into laughter, Marie and Jordan included.

“I don’t think you guys could manage a day without contacting each other.” Cate teased. And Jordan knew a challenge when they heard one, especially from Cate. Marie gave them a slight nod and they grinned despite the racing of their heart.

“Wanna bet?” Jordan asked, a smirk playing on their lips. And so, the bet was on. From midnight tonight to midnight next Monday, Marie and Jordan weren’t allowed to contact each other. Eye contact or brief conversation in public is permitted, but no texting or calls, and absolutely no touching. The winner takes everyone out that weekend. 

Marie and Jordan would pretend that it was no big deal, which was how the bet ended up lasting for a full week. The rest of the crew had money on who would cave first.

Place Your Bets Here (Emma, Sam, Cate, Luke, Andre)

jumanji: i dont think jor will make it past day 4

cricket: r u kidding? they wont make it past day 2. trust me, i live with marie. theyre always around

magneto: i think we’re all underestimating jordans stubbornness. i think marie will almost make it, but give in after jor does something reckless and she goes to yell at them

cricket: marie might be willing to die (or kill) for jordan but she’d never willingly lose a bet to them.

fuego: tbh i think they’re both too stubborn to give in but they will make it our problem during this week and after

jumanji: yeah id bet extra money that jor will spend at least one night this week in my dorm

kong: [liked cricket’s message]

kong: [liked cricket’s message]

It would take less than twenty four hours for both Marie and Jordan to begin to feel the struggle. For Jordan, it was like a persistent itch under their skin. They scrolled through her minimal social media constantly, or flipping through their camera roll just to see her perfect, sunshiney smile. It was marginally better when they were in the same room as her, but that tested their discipline in a whole different way. They were acutely aware of her every move. It took everything in them to keep their eyes on the board. Their notes were... non-existent. 

Marie had the opposite problem. Life was boring without Jordan, but she knew boring. She could handle boredom. But being in the same room as them and not speaking to them? Not touching them? She could barely look at them. Their eyes were always on her, piercing through her, so obviously wanting her. How was she supposed to stay away from those eyes? She barely looked at Instagram, and came close to changing her lock screen just to avoid the temptation. 

This was going to be a long week.

By the third day, Jordan had walked up to Marie’s dorm before walking away three times, and nearly called her countless times. They had also snapped five pens and three pencils while attempting to focus. 

Cate opened her door before Jordan even knocked.

“I’m surprised it took you this long. Come in.” She said lightly, a small smile on her lips.

“I’m actually going fucking insane. Like honest-to-god, I swear I hallucinated her voice in the library earlier. What has this girl done to me?” Jordan flopped back on Cate’s bed, ignoring her irritated look. 

“You’re just in love.” She said casually, finishing taking off her makeup as Jordan spoke.

“That’s worse, Cate! Don’t you see how that’s worse? I’m not prepared for this.” Their legs shortened suddenly, leaving their feet dangling off the edge of Cate’s bed as they shifted.

“Jordan Li. Did you think you could plan falling in love?” Cate admonished, looking directly into the eyes of her anxious friend.

“I thought I could plan it a bit easier than this!” They whined.

“Maybe you are insane. Do you schedule your other feelings?” She teased. 

“... Sometimes.” Cate shook her head and chuckled.

“Jor, stop fighting your feelings and feel them.” She said seriously, before deftly changing the subject.

Marie was in even deeper denial than Jordan. She refused to admit to Emma that she was coming close to losing the bet - even when it was painfully obvious.

“Marie. Marie. Maaaaaaaaarie.” Finally, she resorted to throwing a pillow at her head. “Stop daydreaming about Jordan and help me film this video for my class.”

“I don’t daydream. I’m thinking.” She retorted, but she was clearly staring at Jordan’s hoodie, which was draped over a chair.

“Yeah, sure. And I’m a math whiz. Now help me.” Emma teased, grabbing Marie’s arm and dragging her out of the chair. She would have an enjoyable evening helping Emma with her homework, but night came and she dialed Jordan’s number for the millionth time before turning her phone off and trying to sleep.

But as it turned out, no one could have predicted the outcome of this bet - the two lovebirds were so distracted trying not to think about the other that they walked directly into each other outside of Brink’s office. Fumbling over their things, handing books and papers back to each other, their fingers brushed and it was all over.

“Fuck this.” they muttered in unison. Jordan helped Marie up before sliding their hand directly into hers and dragging her back to their dorm.

"I missed you, Moreau." Jordan mumbled against Marie's lips, their hands cupping her face. She hummed contentedly, resting her hand on the nape of their neck and keeping them close to her.

They took their time with each other, relearning every curve and edge of their bodies. Marie's skin was covered in hickies and bite marks, a blossoming masterpiece that Jordan could not get enough of. She was theirs. It was addictive. They just couldn't get enough of each other. And every small gasp or moan Jordan made sent desire coursing through Marie, a reminder of the power she held over them.

But Jordan couldn't be kept from between Marie's legs for much longer. Her body was incredibly responsive, arching into every touch. They needed to taste her again, feel her come entirely undone for them. They let their tongue trace along her inner thighs, feeling their own arousal surge as she moaned softly.

"Jor, please-" She whined as their tongue teased her wet folds. They smirked, sinking their long fingers into the flesh of her ass, pulling her closer.

"Patience, princess." They said huskily, unable to keep from teasing her a little longer. But finally, their tongue brushed against her clit, causing her body to buck into their mouth. A dark, lustful laugh came from Jordan's throat before they dove in, their lips wrapping around her clit.

Jordan could honestly spend their whole life between Marie's legs, making her whimper, moan, and cry just for them, putting their mouth and tongue to work. But when she cums for the third time, that perfect, fucked out look in her eyes, they can't help themselves. They're shifting without thinking, pulling away from her center and pulling out their cock.

"Fuck, Marie, I need to feel that tight cunt wrapped around me, right now." They groaned, pushing her back fully onto the bed before they pushed themself inside of her cunt, still dripping with her most recent orgasm.

They were both screaming each other's names all night long.

They’d both say the other broke the bet first. Their friends were just glad they didn’t have to deal with the couple’s pouting for a full week.

[roe-and-memory]

headcanons

hi tumblr ihave like three headcanons to share currently (there will be more soon i just need to see how well theyre taken, do we like headcanons on here??)

(based off of him not having headlights but how i perceive it humanized even though racecars cant have headlights in Real Life) lightning has light sensitivity issues with his vision . he cannot see. the sun is too bright sometimes and if its dark he will trip over one of the floorboards in docs house, no matter how many times hes walked this floor. (hes very prone to tripping Always but it just gets worse when its dark) (he has rips in the knees of every single pair of jeans he owns)

docs old sunglasses have his name lasered into the arm, lightning found them basically untouched in a box in docs garage. he pulls them out and starts using them when its too bright outside and doc has learned to just hand them over whenever lightning shows up like

2. lightning just. doesnt sleep ?? he is 100% an insomniac and his nightmares are to blame. he would rather work himself to exhaustion than willingly sleep at a normal time. cue him spending most nights out in the fields or at the junkyard with mater building things or whatever until mater is the one to be like ok im tired im going to bed and lightning is forced to go back home, climb back through his bedroom window, and stare at the ceiling until he passes out. he hates sleeping because every night, without fail, he has nightmares. vivid nightmares about whatever his brain can think of, and when he does sleep hes basically fighting his sheets for five hours because of these nightmares, and then he wakes up early and goes about his day as if he wasn't at war with literal demons 20 minutes ago.

doc knows about these nightmares, of course he does, he's a light sleeper and lightnings room is just across the hall, he's also completely aware that the kid sneaks out the window every night because, although lightning is quiet around the house, he is not too graceful when hes attempting to climb out the window -- he's fallen into the bush beneath it countless times.

because of this, doc has tried everything to help him with the nightmare issue, from melatonin to getting him to just write down whatever he was dreaming about to show himself it wasnt real, and absolutely none of it worked. in fact, melatonin seemed to make it worse, and doc gave up there.

3. doc wears a silver "wedding" band. he's not married, in fact he's never been interested in having a partner or getting married at all (i dub thee aroace) but when he was younger he was certainly eye candy for girls at the racetrack and they fawned over him like nobodies business. he comes up with the great idea to get a silver ring and lie, he makes up some tragic backstory to tell whenever a woman asks him why he has a ring or who the lucky person is, and it makes them back of pretty quickly. in reality, the ring is made from a small wheel bearing, and smokey made it for him when he asked because he thought it was funny as hell and was like yes sure but pls make it sound ridiculous . and dont ever tell the same story twice. confuse them.

word gets around and he's told multiple different stories so everyone is confused, but if someone questions him he just gives them a Look and they shut up about it.

even after his crash and his inevitable leave from the piston cup and thomasville, along with his change of address, he continued to wear the ring just in case he got recognized or something.. (it was for aesthetic reasons, he loves that ring its just his signature thing now)

ok... thats it for now, is this how things get formatted here??? do we Like this???

[class-1b-bull]

Hi, could you do class headcanons of them with a s/o who Loves to info-dump on history horros?

Basically going “Did you know about lobotomies..? It was a pre-quirk procedure that involved sticking a giant needle trough the eye of an awake patient to “Fix their brain”, it only made it worse though.

(Btw if you feel this like to dark feel free to deny it, also glad to have you back 👋🏼❤️)

Not proofread we die like men

Awase - every time you tell him something like that he gets a little more worried about how life was before quirks lmao. Like people willingly poked at eachothers brains? Hes more surprised every time and its hilarious

Sen - he uses any information you gave him to win internet arguments. Instead of L + Ratio he hits them with the horrors of history to shut them up (anyways unrelated but he bullies kids in video games)

Kamakiri - 'im gonna give you a fucking lobotomy if you dont stfu.' He will act like he dosent care but hes secretly kinda interested in it all. If he has questions about it he will look them up himself later instead of asking.

Kuroiro - the dark history ranting is his favorite thing ever. He spends a little bit of his free time looking up some dark history himself so he can maybe tell you about something you haven't learned yet yk.

Kendo - idcidc shes a major history nerd. She loves all things history related so even if its a bit dark shes interested. Shes only interested in history because shes a strong believer of learning from your mistakes and whatnot and she thinks its important to know.

Kodai - shes indifferent about it. She thinks its a little weird but shes not one to judge since everyone has their stranger side ykyk? She just silently listens along to whatever her s/o is ranting about this time lmao

Komori - she finds it a little creepy but at the same time she cant stop listening to her s/o talk about it lmao. (Just dont give her these 'fun facts' late at night or else she might not be able to sleep)

Shiozaki - shes happy to hear you talking about something your interested it but she does worry a bit about those who were affected in the past by something thats just a fun fact now (if that makes sense) like shes interested in the topic but at the same time it makes her a little sad that people actually had to get lobotomys at one point ya know?

Shishida - he seems like the type to be excited to learn something new so every time his s/o tells him about something that happened a long time ago like that hes real happy. (Despite how dark it is)

Shoda - ngl he finds it a bit scary lmao. He finds it interesting and hes happy to hear you talk about it but at the same time hes a bit intimidated

Pony - she thinks its cool and creepy at the same time. Like shes happy and excited to see her s/o talk about something their interested in but at the same time why did it have to be that of all things.

Tsubaraba - he will listen to his s/o for hours at a time it doesn't matter to him what theyre talking about. He is a little intimidated but its fine lmaoo

Tetsutetsu - he thinks your super smart for knowing so much about things like that and he tries his best to give imput but most of it comes out as him saying 'torture dosent seem manly' or smthn like that lmao

Tokage - she loves when her s/o starts to ramble about one of the creepy facts they like. She always gives the most over the top reactions too lmao

Manga - he likes listening to you talk about the creepy stuff his s/o likes while drawing. Its kinda funny since his s/o will tell him about smthn creepy asf and then manga will just show them the cat he just drew.

Honenuki - he thinks its cool and actually becomes really interested in the topic while hes listening to his s/o talk about it. He starts to ask questions and starts going on his own little rambles when hes with them

Bondo - hes a little scared ngl but at the same time he thinks its really cute to watch his s/o ramble lol. So overall hes kinda 50/50 about his s/o's lobotomy rants lmaoo

Monoma - he will talk so much trash lmao. He'll tell his s/o that its creepy or whatnot but at the same time he'll get mad if they stop talking to him about it.

Reiko - she does the exact same thing. So whenever you two are near eachother you just tell eachother all about darker parts of history lmao. 'Did you know about lobotomys?' Vs 'did you know about Japanese(?) water torture?'

Rin - at first he thinks its a bit strange or maybe even creepy but he warms up to the fun facts every now and then. He even gains a bit of an interest himself. Not enough of an interest research it but still.

Gif anime - dungeon meshi

[symphonic-scream]

I got a lot of positives after posting about the step siblings thing so here's more

P5 Step Siblings AU

So to be clear, the "Thieves" all meet in high school, so before that there's just bits from the three/four individual families and such. So, I'll give you some of those bits

Niijima/Kitagawa/Ishiki

So, I've got stuff for the three wives in this. As stated in the first post, Aichi Niijima is an EMT, spending odd hours at work, the smarts of a healthcare worker with the athleticism of a first responder. It's her goal to always be able to pick up her kids, no matter their age

Sayuri Kitagawa is an elementary school art teacher, who also gets featured in galleries, a lot. She never paints the faces of her children, so they're not plastered everywhere, but they're still on her works from time to time. She is ill, but she keeps moving onwards

And, Wakaba Ishiki. She still researches cognition in her spare time, but after falling for the artist she kept seeing painting in Shibuya, she's settled more. She's a high school technology teacher, and is the one who fights to have Goro in their care

Just. Aichi walking around on her off days with at least one kid clinging to her at all times, if not all of them. Sae is always most reluctant, especially as a teenager, and to convince Goro all anyone needs to do is a little reverse psychology

Her carrying like, 10-year-old Makoto on one side, Yusuke aged 9 on the other, and little Futaba at 8 on her back as she cooks, cleans, etc

Sayuri holding Makoto close during storms, and telling her stories to distract from the fear, never diminishing it or anything. She does the same for Futaba, when the world doesn't make sense, holds her tight until she's back to herself, and. She kisses each of their little heads each morning and night, even when they're not so little anymore

Sakamoto

Poor Tsumiki Sakamoto, raising two wild children. Ryuji is a handful on his own, with his endless energy and innate rebellion against authority, but Ann? The two combined just keep making the other Worse

Like. The best example is their first day of high school, they meet the others cause they're sprinting, convinced that they're late cause their Mom set the clocks a half hour ahead. So, they're actually early

They both love movies, so every other week she uses some of her own paycheck money to bring them to see something, snacks and all. The Takamaki money goes towards food, clothes, rent, etc. her own money goes towards making sure they have the best childhood she can give them

When the power goes out, she builds a little fort in the living room with them, with a flashlight and she reads a book, Ann and Ryuji acting out the different characters. By the end they're out of energy, out cold in the fort, unafraid

Tsukimi fosters Ryuji's love of running, and Ann's love of acting. She helps make Ann's costume for a school play, and switches shifts around at the ramen shop to get to attend the school sports festival and cheer Ryuji on for his first wins

They're not super well off, but they're happy, and loved

Sakura

Sojiro had a few different foster placements before his first foster fail. None of them stay with him for too long, just a step on the path, that's all. But then he gets this little, thin, seven year old girl, who's case was all over the news, because her father was a big CEO

Haru was nervous and shy at first, but he cooks her dinner and lets her watch, asking her to taste test. And, she has her own room, and the door doesn't have to stay closed

Plus, he gently carries her when theyre on the train, letting her hide her face in his shoulder. He keeps the media away from her, until the case is old news. And each month, he brings her to talk to her mom, at a small, high end graveyard

Haru fucking loves Sojiro. She's selected for an adoption viewing at one point and she just- cries. Tells the worker she doesn't wanna go, don't make her leave her dad, and

Sojiro cries. She called him Dad,

Akira gets placed with them after a couple years, when he's twelve and Haru thirteen. It takes him longer to settle in, he's, older than Haru was. Been through a bit more. But, he melts into place there, and soon he's got his own apron to wear while making dinner with his dad and his big sister

And, they get a cat. Akira and Haru find him when walking home from middle school, and don't tell Sojiro at first. Then he finds the cat, and it's that, "dad who didn't want the cat" situations. He buys him little sweaters and shit

Sojiro gave them both the option to keep their old family names. Haru asked to change hers to Sakura the night he formally adopted her. Akira asks after a year, before Sojiro had a chance to reveal he was adopting him

And, they look like a perfect little family. Akira looks strikingly like Sojiro, and his curly hair matches Haru's, so

Bonus: Hasegawa

Now, this is Zenkichi here, so he's all emo cause his wife died. But, he has to be even stronger, cause he agreed to take in the daughters of other victims in a similar case he's convinced is connected. Twins, little gymnasts, older than his daughter

Sumire is quiet for a long time. She and Kasumi share a room, but she opens up first to Akane. Akane asks if her hair is really red, and Sumire nods. Akane says it's her favourite colour

The twins are in middle school, and Akane is pretty young. They won't move to Tokyo until the twins start high school, so they're out in Kyoto?? Anyways. Sumire bonds with Akane before opening up to Zenkichi, and Kasumi is more social, but she doesn't truly open up until she sees Sumire looking comfortable. At home.

Then, Sophia. She's found by local police with no ID, no memories, just a jacket with her name stitched into it. Zenkichi, who already has three daughters, takes her for the night at first, while they work stuff out

She, stays much longer

They joke that she's the missing third twin. ("It's called a triplet", Zenkichi corrects, causing his three girls to laugh. "Twin three!" Akane cheers, the older two following after. Sophia smiles and cheers too. "Twin three!")

When they do move to Tokyo, all three start high school at Shujin, meeting the others for the first time

--

Just. I have a lot of thoughts about this one.

[blood-injections]

Hang on. Fuck. New suitehearts au and new backstories for it. Okay so technically killjoys like they choose to fight but also like. Total Freaks and nobody in the zones trusts them. Most people dont even know theyre real, the Suitehearts are just a ghost story. But they're real, haunting an abandoned amusement park in the real fringes of the zones, someplace nobody in their right minds would live. You could spend a night there, maybe, and survive, but living there? Its way too irradiated. But it doesn't seem to bother the suitehearts.

They're all.. off. Physically and mentally. They should be dead from radiation, instead they thrive in it. And they're just sane enough to pass as people but really they’re all more than a little Fucked Up, in their heads, in their very cells. They’re more like wild animals. They’re unwell in some way but formidable all the same. The killjoys that do know them are glad they're on their side and not Better Living's.

Benzedrine grew up in death valley, the scorching, radioactive wastelands beyond the zones. His parents were a couple rich fucks that waited out the helium wars in a bunker in the hills by Vegas, he was just a kid. It was.. a mess. The peace between his parents who always had a strained relationship didn't last long. The longer they were stuck in the bunker the more the three of them went mad. His parents refused to tell him what was happening, having shut themselves in the bunker at the first sign of war. He just knows hes stuck in this place and the ground shakes and he wants to see the sun again, he doesnt understand why this is happening. Eventually the television isnt getting any channels and the radios all static and his parents dont know whats happening either. They all get crazier. His parents argue, becoming more violent towards eachother every day. He stays shut in his room, reading the few books he has until he can practically recite them from memory. One day something changes. He hears a gunshot. Then another. He finds his parents dead in their bedroom.

He wants to leave but he grounds still shaking. He knows it isn't safe. He keeps his parent's rooms door shut and pretends that nothing is wrong. They were running out of food but now that its just him it lasts three times as long. Eventually he convinces himelf hes always been alone here, theres not rotting corpses just down the hall. Eventually, months go by without the ground shaking, and he's getting low on rations. He ventures outside. Up into the nuclear sunlight. He knows he has to find somewhere else to go. Hes young, he has no clue what to do, he has no vehicle or anything, but his instincts guide him towards the city on the horizon. That city is familiar, despite the fact that it should be unrecognizable in the ruins it is, he knows its Vegas. He starts walking. After a few days he starts to get sick. It's the radiation. He has no idea he emerged from that bunker straight into an irradiated wasteland. He finds a town, scours it for water. He's getting sicker by the day, something is very wrong with him. He doesn't feel like a kid, he feels like a fucking soldier, pushing through the pain and delirium, still walking as his skin blisters and hair falls out and guts twist, rotting from the inside out. He feels like he should be dead but somehow he stays just well enough to keep going. Eventually he enters a kind of in between state, where he isn’t quite getting worse, but he’s still rotting. He isn't dying but he isn't getting better either.

After a couple weeks he finds the others. Or, well, the others find him. He passes out, from the radiation or sunstroke, could be anything. He probably would've been fine, woken back up after a few hours, maybe a few days, with his throat dry and screaming as the sun sets and the desert cools. But instead he was found, waking up in a van with bandages covering his blistered skin.

Its other kids, that don't feel like kids anymore. He learns about radiation sickness, thats he's lucky to be pulling through it. Sandman, he learns, has a similar story to him, minus the bunker and parents killing eachother. He's from Texas, saw the pig bomb that started the wars fall with his own eyes. The light, the mushroom cloud. The wars started, his dad fought and didnt come home, he drifted through orphages and survivor groups until he decided to run away, hearing about safety to the west. He stole a motorcycle from someone in the group and left. Hes been wandering the wastes for longer than any of them and apparently went through the same sickness from radiation, but not as bad as Benze, or Donnie did, for that matter, since sandman was somewhere where he had medical help when it came. He's.. strange, right off the bat. Quiet and withdrawn one minute loud and boisterous the next. He laughs too much at things that are entirely not funny and he has a dark sense of humor. At night his eyes shine like crazy and his teeth are a bit Too sharp. Apparently he met Crab after a little while. The stolen bike ran out of gas in the middle of the wasteland and he had to walk. Crab came with an old van and picked him out of the sands and they became fast friends. Crabs the oldest of the group behind Donnie, hes the one that acts the oldest, the most responsible. Apparently he just drifted around, driving where his gut took him, scavenging. Sandman told him about the rumors of the far west and they headed out. They found Donnie after a few weeks together, when they stopped at Vegas, daring to venture into the ruins for supplies. They found Donnie, and after a very tense standoff told him about the rumors too and that they had room in their van. Donnie basically went fuck it and decided to join them, but didn't really get along with them until, a couple days later, when they found Benze, picking him out of the static. Benzedrine's a mystery to the rest of them, who all went through the wost of the sickness ages ago, and here he is like the bombs just fell again. He's got it real bad, too. Sandman had it easy, but he’s seen others die of it, rotting from the inside out. Benzedrine doesn't look that bad, but he looks like he should be a lot worse off than he is when he wakes up and demands to know where he is and who they are.

They quickly learn he's a wild animal. They're all broken in some way- Sandman, his shit always dialed to eleven, eyes glowing, harboring a billion secrets he only tells in riddles. Crab, always on edge, paranoid, in the surface he’s the most level headed of the bunch but he’s far from fine. He walks off when they stop to rest at night to be alone and do god knows what, and he goes long periods of time without speaking. Donnies quiet, secretive, grumpy, his eyes glaze over at particularly loud sounds, breath speeding up like hes having a flashback. Other than that, his face always flat, expressionless as he stares into the distance. Something about him feels dangerous.

And Benzedrine, fucked as well. He spent so long convincing himself he was fine and then longer running on autopilot, that when he wakes up, once the panic fades he's all unnerving smiles. He seems way too normal for someone that should be dead. He's always optomistic, except for when hes annoyed or angry. He has moods that last for days sometimes and when hes in one, hes someone else entirely. Snarling like a rabid dog at the littlest things. The sickly little guy gets fucking terrifying.

But he heads west with them and they keep him around and surprisingly, he gets close with Donnie after a few late night talks when their minds are clearest. They have a really weird thing, they dont seem like they’d work but they do, they can basically read eachother's minds. The quiet grumpy one with the far too bright one, and theyre both secretly the opposite. Once Donnie lets Benze in he starts letting the others in and they really start to become a Crew.

They make it to the zones, become killjoys and claim a base where they know they'll be safe, in the borderlands, where neither killjoys nor bli would venture. Because most all the killjoys here, they've got a certain amount of resistance to the radiation, but they'll never walk right into it. But the Suitehearts? They're survivors, they faced the radiation and survived it and now it lives in them and they can live in it. They become urban legends but they're just a crew like anyone else, safe in their freaky amusement park base, all of them Wrong in some way. Crazy bright eyeshine or Sandman's too-sharp teeth or the way the sun and weather and sickness seems to have no effect on Benzedrine. The way Donnie can hear the smallest thing from across a valley or the way Crab could navigate with his eyes closed. All of them changed, and all of their minds fucked, cracked. Wild, unnatural laughter that will give you chills. The way they're all a little too good at killing. The first time Benzedrine did he stared between the gun in his hands and the drac on the ground and smiled, this new thrill something he quickly became obsessed with, blood something he all but hungered for. Think ybc. Literal bloodlust, maybe. An alter ego, where all he can see is red(or, well, I guess it’d be yellow lol). Anyway, the four of them, each a little inhuman in their own ways, strange and deadly.

I'm obsessed with them, radioactive wasteland survivor freaks. They're not quite monsters but they're definitely inhuman in some way. They came back wrong except they didnt come back they were just changed as they survived. Radiation mutations and pstd and mental illnesses and concerning obsessions with blood.

[gabessquishytum]

Concept where dream and hob are both transmasc and they both want to carry a pregnancy. Dream has a Weird Coworker (Corinthian) who finds out theyre going through the process to find a surrogate and offers to "cut out the middleman". He says it as a joke because his life mission is to make people as uncomfortable as possible but dream is the WEIRDER Coworker and doesnt realize its a joke and is like "oh thank you that would be great!" And Corinthian... doesn’t know what to say that! Ultimately they decide to go through with it, Corinthian is even more surprised that hob is Into It (for Fetish Reasons tho). Hob insists they do it the "old fashioned way" and dream agrees bc its free! Corinthian gets to fuck them both pregnant and watch as they grow bigger and more glowing throughout <3 theyre SO appreciative and hes over quite a bit as a kind of "almost third"

-🔪

Riding the Hobrintheus train today!! I love it!!

These three are so funny because. People always assume that Corinthian is the weird one. And then they meet Dream and they're like oh, he's the weird one!

And then they meet Hob.

Hob is the one with the kink, and Hob is the one who says they should cut out the middleman! If Cori cums inside them both on the same night then hopefully they can get pregnant together! It's an ideal situation (an ideal situation mostly for Hob and his breeding kink but hey, it is the cheapest option too).

Cori is living his best life as sperm donor?? Fuck buddy?? He secretly loves kids so he's going to be living his best life as official weird uncle to the kiddos when they come along.

The heavens are obviously smiling because it all goes perfectly to plan. Dream and Hob have the same conception date, and although they have WILDLY different pregnancies, they just have a really fun time! Hob gets migraines and nosebleeds and has a hellish first trimester while Dream breezes through until 20 weeks, when suddenly every part of his body hurts and he cries about everything. It's a relief to have each other and to be able to rely on each other, plus Cori is very attentive.

For the last couple of months Hob and Dream are both off work and having all kinds of crazy sex. Cori comes home (he kinda moves in, to help out while they're both physically struggling) to find them waiting and horny, wanting to take advantage of the changes to their bodies for a few more weeks <3

[munivrse]

enhypen as employees at my old coffee/icecream shop

cw: work shenanigans. war flashbacks of spilling hot milk on hands. niki breakdancing.

Heeseung: probably the manager

so nice

friends with with all of the employees on a personal level

sings on karaoke nights and entrusts the rest of the kids to run the shop for the time being

hums while he prepares drinks

one time steamed milk and it boiled over onto his hand as a customer watched. he brushed it off but cried in the office afterwards. (based on a true story 😔)

Jay: customer

jay is a customer who comes in for the same coffee drink every day: just a caramel frappe.

likes to explain he wants a medium caramel frappe with no syrup and extra whip in the most complicated way so that he can talk to the cashier for a long time.

really only came to visit jake at work but became well acquainted with the rest of the staff and now theyre all besties.

specifically wants to take the cashier, shrink him, and put him in his pocket.

they let him carry out drinks during karaoke nights sometimes.

one time came in and asked for a cold brew with one ice cube in it. clearly it had been a very rough day.

Jake: server

love jake but

cannot make an order to customer satisfaction to save his life. (bitter espresso, too much ice in frappes, etc.)

heeseung really liked how polite and sweet he was so he made him a server.

all of the older customers are in love with him and sometimes will ask him to sit with them if the shop isnt busy.

just so personable and sweet he is a dream server.

loves karaoke nights because he loves live music and all of the regulars come to watch him sing a bit too.

one karaoke night a child had ran right in front of him as he was briskly walking back from delivering drinks. came back to the counter pale as a ghost, "guys i almost just steamrolled a child 😰"

Sunghoon: barista

looks scary, very funny and nice.

only makes coffee. likes making new drinks (specifically themed holiday drinks.)

claims he makes the best espresso shots. he is correct.

every customer has a crush on him even though he doesn't leave from behind the counter

does karaoke with heesung if the day is going by slow.

so smart; lacks common sense.

spilled ice in the backroom and then sprayed hot water on the ice to melt it. there is no drain in the floor. so it was just 2x the amount of water. took two hours to dry.

Sunoo: drive thru

his voice is just so nice to hear. makes jokes at the window too.

mostly at the drive thru because nobody wants to uell at him when they see him through the window.

when the drive thru isnt busy they usually ask him yo clean up a bit around the shop and he always sings along to the songs playing off the speakers

a smart ass who plays around too much with niki.

makes all of the summer refreshers

one time the shop was out of 60% of their ice creams and he got very tired of people saying "So what DO you have???" so he muted his mic, screamed into the tip jar so that nobody could hear him, unmuted the mic, and proceeded to list out what they did, in fact, have.

Jungwon: Cashier

polite 80% of the time until some woman comes up and complains that her drink does not taste like how they do at starbucks.

"unfortunately ma'am, this is not a starbucks. this is (shop name). we can remake the drink if you'd like it sweeter..."

perfect balance of smart and polite responses

has a couple regulars that he loves talking to though.

thinks its funny when jay comes up asking the following: "can i get a... whats it called.. the frozen drink with-" "with the caramel?" "... yeah the caramel. what's that called again?" "A caramel frappucino." "frappucino.. gotcha. can i get the caramel frappucino? size-" "size medium. i know. you're here every thursday and friday. go sit down."

Niki: who really knows. gets paid good tho

he does a bit of everything. please dont let him make espresso though hes not too good at that yet.

just makes a fool of himself every day he works.

in charge of the ice cream portion of the store. ice cream scoops are significantly too big for $1.99

does the thing where you flip the ice cream scoop in the air and try to catch it on the cone. literally misses every time but nobody yells at him because the customers love it.

dances around while sweeping and is actually... abnormally good.

doesnt sing for karaoke night but will jokingly be a backup dancer doing the most when an employee sings

break dancing while jake sings love yourself

get those two away from eachother

drive thru is right behind the ice cream freezer so he'll tap sunoo's shoulder and turn around as if nothing happened.

theres a tv that usually has an aesthetic coffee shop themed picture on it throughout the day. one time the remote was left unattended and niki changed it to minecraft speed runs. nobody noticed until a group of kids wouldnt stop looking at the tv.

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole Head canons

a/n: okay so i randomly had this idea and i'm aware most people wont be interested in the slightest but i just had to write it, for myself more than anything haha. So I was thinking about the character Lou within my Matty series "insufferable arsehole" and i was thinking about her relationship/friendships with the guys and decided to do some head canons for each of the boys... enjoy if you do read haha

Special thanks goes to @poisonmedaddy13 aka my wonderful support system on here :) thank you for helping me with this, for not shutting down my ideas and for having my back

Part 5 will be posted soon so keep your eyes peeled if you're interested :)

PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE YET TO READ INSUFFERABLE ARSEHOLE BC SPOILERS!

You can read the series here

George:

George has been her best friend since diapers, they've gone through every aspect of their lives together, that fact alone means that they're bonded for life

They know every minute detail about each other

She thinks he probably knows her better than anyone

He's the one person in her life who has been a steady unwavering support

He's her rock, the person she knows she can go to for everything, for advice, for comfort for laughs, anything

they have to deal with lots of people assuming they're something more and it has got a bit tiring over the years but theyre kind of used to it by now

she knows he would jump in front of a train if it meant she lived

he would hurt anyone who hurts her and has come close to beating up ex's of hers that have been douches (and has punched a fair few of them)

she's the first he shares lyrics with or song concepts (even more matty sometimes)

they both felt that because they were so close, whatever one was feeling, the other felt too

not a day went by where they didnt talk, even when they weren't together, on opposite sides of the world, they would still talk

there was this one time: when they were around 16 maybe 17, g had organised this big surprise party for her birthday, it was absolutely amazing, he had managed to get a fuck ton of beer and weed from an older friend, his garden was full to the brim of all of their friends, some people she didnt know (not that it matter). but despite it being HER birthday party, he had invited matty who at some point in the night had said something about how the dress she was wearing would make all the guys think she was an easy fuck... she remembered how her best friend (a very drunk and high george) had laughed at mattys words... they didn't talk for weeks after that until one day her lanky friend appeared at her door, begging on his hands and knees to forgive him, saying how much of a prick he had been and how much he had missed her. somehow they grew closer after that, he would always have her back and she never questioned that.

they have their own handsake and george knows her disdain for something by one simple fact: she will crinkle her nose up at him, he'd do it back and then they'd laugh about it... it was their thing

she was practically his sister

nicknames they have for each other: G, Georgie (he doesn't like this too much), he calls her Lou ofc, also pumpkin (when she was sad or needed comfort),

Ross:

ross and lou grew close when they were kids, they were never as close as G and Lou (basically impossible to be) but there friendship was different

ross feels like the person she goes to when she doesn't even know she needs him

he's always there for her: always

he knows whats wrong before she does most of the time

they're relationship has the same vibe as ross x matty, that kind of intense platonic love

he's her cuddle bear, someone who gives amazing hugs, the kind that heal her

again she knew he'd die for her and she would for him

he was one of the best things that had ever happened to her, she know if she were to have kids he'd be the god father

she was his wingwoman most of the time, always trying to find a partner who was deserving of his love, someone who would love him the way he needed to be loved

he felt like her platonic soulmate, someone that made her soul happy

buttttt.... when they were younger they did used to flirt... like ALOT and people often thought they were together bc of this... they got drunk at a party once a shared quite a steamy kiss (they would take this to their graves btw) but over time it kind of just fizzled out and was replaced with this platonic love, he was enamored with her regardless

they were often childish with each other, he'd carry her around the empty stages on his back, so she began calling him "monkey man" not only bc he was freaking tall but because she clung to him like a monkey

nickanmes: lou would call him: monkeyman, macdonald, mr macdonald, he calls her: sweetcheeks, rockstar, cool kid, sweetheart

Adam:

now adam and lou aren't as close as lou x george and lou x ross but he's still one of her best friends

adam is the person she goes to if she needs an honest opinion, he is the The “tell it like it is” friend and she is so appreciative of that: often the other boys' opinions can be clouded by how much they love her, adam always had a fair mind about her

And tbh she was that for him too, he remembers when he confided in Lou about his worries about carly in his relationship (very early on in their relationship), he told her how he was worried carly would leave him becuase they could never have a 'normal' relationship, they'd always be on tour, swarmed with fans, fans who (despite their sweet intentions) would always want to know everything about their relationship, Lou all but smacked him round the head, telling him he was being ridiculous, that he'd never find another like carly, someone who was so loving and accepting of everyone she met, told him he might as well marry her and that his thoughts although valid, were just thoughts, and that the realistic state of things was that carly was going to love him regardless.

he is someone who watches on the sidelines, showering her with love and affection and his admiration in his own way, often by doing simple things like "i got you xyz thing because i remember you mentioned it"

he loves how she makes carly feel welcome, always the first to talk to her and ask how she is (carly and hann and agreed that they'd ask her to be godmother)

he's not often one to be cuddly with her but when he is it means so much more

they are the type of friends who dont have superficial conversations, their conversations are much more meaningful than that

he knows she'd do anything to protect him, carly and the baby that is on the way and is so thankful to her for that

she likes how in depth their conversations are, everyone knows hann as this guy that doesn't talk much but the two of them often talks for hours

he's one of those friends that tells these cracking jokes out of the blue that makes everyone die of laughter

nicknames: she ofc calls him Hann, she teasingly starts calling him daddy, he mainly calls her Lou tbh, sometimes calls her rockstar too