#just tha backstory after it happens

[ablog]

I love pov!! I love povs so much!!! I love to see stories of why and how the "bad guy" got to where they are! Bonus points if from their pov they are the good guy!

I would LOVE to see a show/movie that starts with us following the regular hero backstory and see the character grows and becomes a better person and all of that, and later have corruption arc, but not from some evil dude doing something to them, but from the inside and all that occurred to them, the bigging of a hero and a villain are often similar with little differences from their lifes and the environment around them it's so fucking interesting and i would LOVE to have it as the show's "twist"

[brainrot-stitch]

AHAAA I FINISHED IT WOAHHH i usually don't finish art things omg...

Anyways current sabre design!!! (It will probably change bc I can NEVER make up my mind on any design ever sob)

He's such a goof :3 (IM NEVER DRAWING THAT RAINBOW ELYTRA AGAIN IM CRYING)

Anyways some headcanons below cuz I feel like yapping :3

-rainbow totally would have gotten him and sabre friendship necklaces (yk the matching kind with magnets that come together n all) and after knowing lucas for a bit he woulda made friendship bracelets !!

-like that one person I reblogged said, he's such a mad scientist he's so silly omgg

-i love the reincarnation au SO MUCH its literally fire but in normal headcanons I think he used to be part of the creed and an assasin and ermm

Basically I headcanon his whole assassins creed series was basically his backstory before starting to do research on these 'steve' entities

-when nervous/anxious his footsteps will be completely silent out of habit from the whole assassin thing, and he'd obviously do it when purposefully trying to sneak (he has probably scared rainbow or Lucas multiple times by doing this..)

-I'm not sure weather to headcanon that his wings were damaged by a steve really early on in the steve saga (like before rainbow could speak or maybe when dark was still pretending to be blue) or if it was smth that happened when he was still an assassin but it's one of those!!!

-hes an avian.. heh... if u couldn't tell from the ref sheet.. but NOT a chicken!! The chicken jokes are just bc of the hoodie and bc his feathers look a lil similar :3

-he has like 2 of the same chicken hoodie he'll wear most often but still has some normal outfits AND assassins outfits and weapons he keeps away (most are green or have some sort of green in them heh.. I might draw that later)

-ok ok ok I have so many eye headcanons it's so hrggrrrrh the main one tho is one I snatched from the reincarnation au and that's that he doesn't have eyes!! Bc of an injury or sum and he js says he has sensitive eyes and the bandana fabric is see through up close.. but he can still see bc he's a player and the way players work is weird. Other headcanon, green eyes. Other headcanon, brown eyes. Other headcanon, heterachromia green and brown eyes. Other headcanon pure white eyes. Other headcanon code eyes. Other headcanon (gets hit by a bus)

-if we r going with the reincarnation au for the eyes, I feel like only rainbow and Lucas would know, if we're going with the others, I'd say rainbow, Lucas, Alex, galaxy, and maybe the guardian (I forgot if that's what he was called or not) would know. If we're going with the code eyes, then only lucas would know

-not sabre specifically but I feel like steves in general wouldn't be very used to or know but about blood/gore stuff, bc they're more used to being destroyed/poofing, and later on being destroyed through a machine. Being actually killed by a sword or something of the sort they are not used to seeing, and are very touchy on the subject

-on that note I imagine if there's like a steve that's immune to most or all other steve powers and or machines that they're trying to get rid of and arguing on what to so abt I imagine sabre being like "oh 1 sec I got this" and boom that mf DEAD 😭

-and they'd b like 😰

"Guess we're gonna have to kill this guy sabre" "damn"

-ermmm silly billy activity...

-I feel like he'd know a lot more than the other steves on things like the nether and end (not end city tho that's a whole other mc headcanon I don't feel like yapping abt rn) bc those are the dimensions players have access too and steves usually dont.. so they'd b like "WTF SABRE WHAT R U DOING THAT IS A LITERAL HELLSCAPE WITH LAKES OF FIRE AND MONSTERS WEVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE FYM U CAN GET 'NETHERITE' THERE" and he'd b like "well don't go in the fire then and it anything attacks u kill it ig" (not actually sob.. I feel like only he and Lucas would go there bc most steves r hindered greatly by lava and the only ones we've seen that aren't are bad guys if my memory is correct)

Ermm I have more but I'm eepy and can't remember so those r for another day!!!

Reblogs>likes

Don't post my art to other platforms without my permission pls x3

[mysticficti0n]

All my Attention part 3

warnings- swearing, mentions of a dildo, sexual tension, kissing, quite fluffy

words- 3.1k

If you'd like to read the previous parts → All my attention series

a/n- so if you're new here I am British and cannot speak any German, I speak a little French, Spanish and Italian but German- no. I also do not trust Google translate so this is gonna be like an avatar thing (if you've seen the newest one Jake says that their language just became normal or something along those lines) so in reality this is all in German, you as a reader know German but, its wrote in English... make sense? no... well, sorry this part has taken a while- I'm on holiday atm so I probably wont be posting till I'm home BUT I didn't want you to be without, also fucking thank you all so much for the response to the first and second part! I can't believe the response to it, I could've cried because im a baby , love you all 🤍

(also to the people who've sent requests they will be coming soon!)

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backstory- you are the 5th member of Tokio Hotel and you always thought the love was equally platonic between you and a certain guitarist... but what if that all changed?

"exactly what I said- we can't keep doing the same thing at every show" Georg spoke shovelling eggs into his mouth, the band and our runners, managers, directors, and everyone else who I didn't know exactly what they did for us... were all sat on tables eating breakfast before rehearsal "because I'm sorry if we go on tour I wont wanna blow my brain out because i'm playing by your side for the millionth time"

"yeah but there's a thing called a set list, we have to stick with it otherwise" Bill leaned closer into the table facing all of us "otherwise we'd get shit and we all know how Felix will react- we all remember last time" he had a point, Felix as nice as he can act is a massive cock, once in a performance we decided to all go to the front of that stage to say goodnight- but Felix didn't like that and he ended up cancelling our next 3 shows to 'teach us a lesson'

"even so" the bassist grumbled, the conversation fell short as we all continued to eat, I had a bowl of granola, greek yogurt, raspberries and strawberries, soon the scrapping of a chair pulled me from eating my breakfast, I looked up to see Tom in a huge black shirt and basketball shorts "hungry?" Georg joked seeing the pile of food on his friends plate

"a bit" Tom laughed grabbing part of a waffle "whats that?" he spoke looking at me, that was the first time he spoke to me since what happened only an hour before, I think we were both in a shock state still, but I also couldn't deny how good it felt

"granola, yogurt and fruit" I spoke back digging my spoon into the mix and pulling it back so he could have a taste, he bent forward taking the food and hummed

"Tha actuwally gwood" he spoke mouth still full

"ew Thomas swallow for fucks sake!" I spat seeing him nearly choke the food back up "Tom!" I called pushing myself away from the table "whats wrong with you" I laughed I look to see the rest of the boys laughing as well at his stupidity

"we can't go anywhere nice with you two" Bill commented throwing a napkin to his brother who wiped his mouth and finished his laugh

"sorry- I don't know why that was so funny to hear you say" he snorted, I finally sat back in my place next to Gustav who was eating his food with a smile

"all I said was swallow your food" I argued back looking at the guitarist

"normally me saying that to girls-" I rolled my eyes at his words but everyone else chuckled along, after another half an hour (mostly so Tom could finish his monstrous plate) we were bringing our bags down from the hotel room to put in the bus, we all got in the lift which I don't think was made for 5 people, and 2 of those 5 being over six foot tall

"can you move over I can't fucking breath" I spoke shoving Bill back bit

"now I can't breath you cunt!" Bill called back pushing me back laughing, soon the intercom spoke and the doors opened and I made my way out but was soon tackled by the black haired singer

"BILL WHAT THE FUCK" I shouted with a laugh, I crawled from his grip and began running away seeing him get up to and following my movement "AHHH!" I screamed turning a corner and then slipping past a cleaner cart

"Y/N COME HERE!" I herd Tom voice shout as I sprinted to him with his twin hot on my tail, I watched him open his hotel room and I ran as quick as I could into it and slammed the door spitting out a chuckle hearing the boy hit the door

"BITCH!" Bill sang followed by his own laugh and steps faded away from the door, I sat on Tom's bed and lay my head back into the sheets catching my breath hearing the door open again

"you good now?" He asked smiling at me "I didn't realise you were that fast- I swear you weren't when we were kids"

"excuse me! people change" I answered kicking him slightly, he grabbed my ankle stopping me from moving anymore- I melted at his touch which wasn't a usual thing

"mhm, you changed in a good way babe don't worry about it" he flirted looking down at me the smile changing into a smirk

"you're in a very odd mood today mr Kaulitz" I spoke sitting myself as he let go of my ankle

"only for you-" he leant down, pressing his head on mine "and if I remember properly, who moaned when we kissed earlier? hum?" his hand was now resting on the base of my neck "who was it Y/n?"

"I don't know Tom" I answered seeing him bite his lip at my words "maybe you imagined it?" we always played around, flirting but this was different... very different

"I have a fucking good imagination then don't I?" Tom pulled away slightly, his his fingers brushed my skin as he let go and he held my chin, lifting my face to look up to him "....I prefer looking at you like this" I blushed at his words, they made me feel soft

"bet you say that to all the girls" he seethed rolling his eyes

"only the special ones...and you're really special!"

"way to ruin a mood" I huffed

"I'm joking Y/n/n, you just look hot below me ts'all" his hand held me tighter and he bent to reach my lips, he pressed hard humming into the feeling and sucked my bottom lip causing me to have to hold back any noise I threatened to make as I didn't want a repeat of earlier "I better get packing" he spoke pulling back creasing my cheek with his thumb leaving me with a unfulfilled feeling

"yeah.." I pouted, he looked back down at me and grinned

"god don't look at me like that... fuck- stop now, I've gotta pack" I stood with him as he turned to grab a tossed shirt from the floor, his hand glided down my thigh leaving a trail of goosebumps- he knew what he was doing, making me blush and shudder as his hand left me "oopsie"

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we all sat backstage kicking our heals as the crowd arrived, but we also knew the crowd was special- our families were watching us tonight, I decided I'd wear a more appropriate outfit (not like my family hadn't seen pictures of me in mini-skirts and tube tops saying 'pouty') I looked alot like Tom, my baggy jeans hanging around my hips with a matching tank top to him "5 minuets!" a runner called making us all rise from our places

"excited?" Georg smiled shoving me lightly

"I can't wait" I spoke pinning around to the music that began, Bill looked back at me with a smile followed by a wink

"3...2...1" Felix called and Tom, Bill entered the stage erring a eruption from the crowd "go!" Georg and I walked on and smiled seeing the sea of fans watching us with grins plastering their faces and finally Gustav entered

"GOOD EVENING TRIER" Bill called holding the mic close "ARE YOU EXCITED!" though the lights were blinding I could make out the shapes of bodies from my place "ugh we have a show n' a half for you all tonight, and this show is very special to us- one, this is our last show here in the lovely Trier and- most importantly our biggest fans are here tonight" the lights moved to the box above the crowd and for the first time in weeks I saw them: mom, dad, Stella, the Kaulitz, Listing and Schäfer family, I nearly cried waving to them and blowing them kisses "so tonight is going to be the best show we've ever done guys! ARE YOU READY" I watched as my family cheered and little Stella clapped her hands. Tom's guitar began the start of Scream followed by Gustav and Bill ran back to main stage, the crowd danced and jumped along "SCREAM" they called back to us at every chorus making me laugh.

The night carried on and everything was going amazingly, and it came time for me to take centre stage, I brought my mic and herd people call my name "so- this is our newest piece of music, I originally wrote when I was in a very bad place, and as you all know I'm back up singer so usually I don't perform up here- so close to everyone so I'm a little nervous but.. but it means a lot to me so.. this is 'please don't jump'" claps filled the room and Tom joined me giving me a nod as he plucked away followed by Gustav and Georg, Bill was in the corner sipping a water watching me like a proud dad

I let my self get lost in the music, stomping my feet and twirling around "don't let memories go! of me and you" I sang watching my family stare in awe, I began up stage onto the platform where I stood teetering on the edge, all lights went off besides the one on me "PLEASE DON'T JUMP! DON'T JUMP, AND IF ALL THAT CAN'T HOLD YOU BACK, THEN I'LL JUMP FOR YOU" I finished bowing to the crowd who burst out with claps, screams and calls making me jump at the sudden noise

"Y/N Y/N Y/N!" people began to chant making me well up, Gustav ran up the platform steps holding my hand gently so I could get down the steps as it was tricky in platforms, hand in hand we met with Tom who smiled widely mouthing 'they're proud' I looked to see my mom whistling, soon the five of us stood at the tip of that walkway, people reached for us, calling us all over

"THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT!" we all shouted bowing once more as the light darkened, we all walked off and back to our room where there were drinks set out and towel "shit Im so thirsty" Georg spoke grabbing the bottle and cracking it open as we all took our first proper breath and relaxed

"erm- sorry I know you got off stage but someones hear" Gayle, my runner spoke holding the door open a little more

"BABA!" a small voice called, I looked down to see Stella dressed in a Tokio Hotel shirt and orange leggings running toward me, her blonde hair tied into piggy tails

"STELLA!" I cried falling to my knees pulling her into my arms "oh my god I missed you so much" I whispered into her neck, her bright eyes looked into mine and I couldn't let go of her, I pressed kisses to her chubby cheeks

"Oh my- Y/n dear! another voice came in and I snapped my head to see my mother, tear stained face reaching for me, I watched as Stella ran onto Gustav who picked her up hugging her tightly and I ran to my mom who was closely followed by the rest of our families "sunshine I missed you!"

"I missed you too mom" I cried as she stroked my hair away from my face, she let go and I turned to see my dad who had Tom in a bro-hug

"aww hello Poppy!" he spoke, I nearly fell apart hearing my nickname again, and he grabbed me into the hug "aw that was amazing kids" he spoke letting go of us, I stood speaking with them until I herd the voice of my sister

"Tommy!" she laughed and everyones faces snapped to her

"SHE SAID MY NAME!" The dreadheaded boy called lifting her into his arms and tickling her "ME BEFORE BILL!" he danced seeing her smile

"Hey! Stella I thought you liked me more!" Bill huffed squishing the cheeks of her face

"am I the better twin?...yeah! I know" Tom scoffed bouncing her on his hip, our families laughed and all began hugging each other

"darlings that show was fantastic and the crowd! I couldn't believe it" Simone, the twins mom smiled "I couldn't be more proud"

"thanks mom" Bill hugged pressing a kiss to her cheek "wait..erm hold on!" we all watched as the singer ran out calling for something, I turned to see Stella smiling and reaching for all the boys, Tom, Georg and Gustav were sat on the floor singing songs and twirling her around, the song finished and Stella did a bow making the boys laugh at her antics

"Baba!" the little blonde called reaching for me, Tom realised and quickly scooped her up so she was lying on her tummy with her arms out she began airplane sounds (but kept interrupting herself with her chuckles) "Brrrrrrrrr!" she grinned showing her two small teeth

"aww my baby airplane" I spoke reaching for her as Tom got closer, the two reached me and I took my sister from his arms spinning her while pressing a kiss to her cheek again "you're a very cute plane Stella"

"Plane!" she repeated getting a 'yeah a plane' from the guitarist who couldn't stop smiling

"Okay... everyone come stand over here were getting a photo!" Bill came back in grabbing his family, the line up was the Kaulitz' far left, then my family the Y/l/n's, then the Schäfer's and finally Listing's "We want a few!" Bill called to the person holding the camera

"1...2....3" everyone did a wide smile, even Stella knew what was going on "perfect, do you want another one of these then we can do different stuff like.. the point?" its like a lightbulb went off it the taller twins head

"okay yes... then the point, then serious faces, then one with us 5 a bit more infront of our families, then on chairs" he rambles while setting us all back out for the next 3000 photo's we'd be taking

I don't think I've ever herd the numbers 1,2 and 3 said so much in my life but after half an hour the pictures were finally done and in fairness they looked great "well we best get going" Christine, Georg's mom spoke grabbing her bag

"oh.." we began before Simone whispered something to her husband

"why don't you all come stay round ours? we can have a family night, drinks, games, food" me and the band cheered, quickly grabbing our stuff and getting ready to walk out- we knew that today being a day show, fans would be waiting for us- we decided the safest option was to give our families over to security along with our bags and walk out on our own

"okay Stella we'll see you in a little while okay?" I hugged her once more before giving her over to dad who was carrying her out, we waited till we knew they were in their cars and I came the time we'd be walking out, with one last check of the room we began outside, screams filled our ears, people threw flowers to us, cards, papers and... thongs- but we picked the flowers up. a few people grabbed at my clothing but besides that it was a safe 3 minuet walk from the building to the bus

"they were loud" Gustav spoke getting into his favourite seat, at the very back on the left "Georg come sit!" he called to the bassist who jumped through the seats, leaving Bill who liked sitting in the front then me and Tom sat in the middle two seats

"god I fucking loved that show" I spoke belting myself in, Tom did the same and our hands brushed- its not something that many would really worry about, it was an accident.. but I could help go hot at the feeling

"it was so good, I feel like we'll be in Felix's good books" the dreaded boy spoke getting a nod from the band, we finally began the drive home, it would only take around an hour and a half so I got myself comfy which meant me resting my legs over Tom- this was a normal thing as usually sometime around the trip we'd switch and I can accidentally put my cold drink on his legs while he's asleep definitely not making him yelp- no not at all...

"can you take my shoes off, you're closer" I spoke tapping his shoulder and with a huff he began unlacing the platforms, I sighed at the feeling of my feet going light and not having to lug those shoes around any more "thanks bab" I called leaning my head back, Tom got comfy to, scooting deeper into the seat and his hands lay on my legs drawing small shapes and humming a long to whatever song was on the radio

"wanna know something crazy?" He asked looking over at me to which I nodded "I haven't fucked a girl since Tuesday, and its Friday now" I pretend to be shocked, slapping my hands to my face

"holy shit! that is crazy!" he rolled his eyes "I can't even remember when I last fucked someone- probably around my birthday" I sighed slightly annoyed, not that I'm some sex freak who needs to be constantly fucked to live but... my birthday is in February and its now July

"damn... how do you go that long?" Georg spoke uncrossing his arms, being genuinely interested

"Notta clue... I-"

"Y/n I know whats in the back draw in your room" Bill turned showing a sinister smile

"Bill!" I called knowing exactly what he was on about

"ooo" the boys cooed making me go red, Bill laughed even harder pointing at my face "aww! she's embarrassed about her dil-"

"BILL SHUT IT!" I shouted flinging my empty water bottle at him making him cackle throwing his pillow at me

"IT'S BLACK!" He called and the 4 boys Burt out laughing again spluttering words and coughing at how much they were laughing

"oh my god you are all dicks!" I groaned trying to push myself as far back into my seat as I could, I even took my legs down from Tom who I could realised but I was way to embarrassed to give him a 'look'

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"he traffic isn't moving so were going to be a little later to the Kaulitz" Gregory our driver spoke facing us

"ugh" we all collectively sighed, its been over 30 minuets of just stand-still traffic, cars horns went off but nothing was moving and being a warm day in a quite packed van it was getting hot

we'd moved past the dildo conversation thanks to Tom who made a fool of himself by spilling water all down his shirt- I did wonder though, was it on purpose? to take away the attention from me... but anyways whatever it was, or even just it was an accident- my legs were back on his and he continued to draw little shapes

"I'm going to sleep" Bill spoke looking back to which we gave a nod, by we I mean me and Tom as the other two fell asleep a few minuets back, the van sound turned quiet as the radio was turned off

"wanna play a game?" Tom spoke quietly

"sure, which game?" I asked seeing a little grin appear to his face

"erm... eye spy?"

[hehetmongi]

🏖️🐚🌊 waves along the shore | chapter one | (ateez ot8/reader) 🏖️🐚🌊

chapter one: fateful encounter at illusion bay

series summary: you just broke things off with your fiancé. out of options, you go to your family’s beach house across the country to clear your mind. you're not expecting to see familiar faces in the house next door...

chapter word count: 4.6k

pairings: ateez ot8 x reader

tags: alternate universe - modern setting, beaches, beach house, emotional hurt/comfort, healing, polyamory, fluff and smut, unconventional romance, 18+ mdni

ao3 chapter link | masterpost link

warnings: reader was involved in a past toxic/controlling relationship; this does not involve any members of ateez. alcohol consumption in this chapter.

notes: reader plays the piano and has a backstory that is significant to the plot. more notes in masterpost.

Your mother picks up the phone on the third ring. You ignore the way your stomach twists when she greets you cheerily, unaware of the storm that’s coming ahead. 

“I need you to know I’m alive and okay,” you hear yourself say. Your voice is firm and unyielding despite your nerves. “You’re the only one I’m going to tell this to, so I need you to keep this a secret.” 

The rest of your story tumbles out of your mouth without restraint. Enough was enough — after eleven months of an unhappy engagement to your fiancé, you needed to leave your life behind. 

He made it difficult to break things off. Every time you tried to initiate a breakup conversation, he’d divert somehow. Eventually, he sprung a proposal on you, and you felt you were in too deep to turn him down. Everything that followed, from the joint engagement announcements on your Instagram accounts to the wedding cake and venue planning, felt like a knife twisting in your gut. 

And then… something happened two nights ago. He hadn’t struck you, but the look in his eyes made you think he was about to: pure anger and malice, all directed at you for the first time in your relationship. 

So, fearing for your safety, you decided to run away. You’re on the road now, driving a rental car down an empty highway toward the coastline. You didn’t think you were headed anywhere specific, but you found yourself gravitating toward familiar streets and roads from distant childhood memories. 

“I left my ring on the nightstand and turned off my location,” you tell her. “He’s still at work now and doesn’t know that I left, but he’s going to be suspicious soon.”

Your mother hums on the other line. You can tell that she’s thinking, trying to give you enough time to explain yourself as she processes such difficult information. 

“I just… I know it’s a lot to process. But I really, really needed to take my life back before things got worse,” you finish. 

Distantly, a part of you wonders if you made a mistake by telling her. You hope you’ve done enough to convince her to be on your side with this. If not, you fear you might really be alone. 

“I’m just so sad,” your mom finally says, and you brace yourself for the worst. Until she continues, “that you thought you couldn’t come to me with this earlier. That you’ve been feeling this way about him for so long.” 

Your eyes well with tears. You do your best to blink them away, not wanting them to get in the way of your driving. 

“I’m with you in this,” she tells you. “And I always will be. But we need to find a place for you to hide, and fast.” 

You suck in a long, deep breath. This was your one and only plan, the only hope you really had to get away from your fiancé once and for all. If it didn’t work, then you might be stuck hotel-hopping for the foreseeable future until you can discreetly get an apartment, which would be far from ideal. 

“The beach house,” you offer, “the one I ran away to just before college. I could stay there, if it’s unoccupied.” 

Something in your stomach flutters at the memory. You’d felt lost then, too, and time at the beach was exactly what you needed to get your head on straight. Well, that and the two boys next door, all shy smiles and bumping elbows and needy kisses that still haunt your dreams, sometimes. 

Your mother scoffs. “You scared your father and me half to death back then.”

“But this time, I’m telling you in advance.”

“You are,” your mother intones, then pauses for a moment to think. You hold your breath as you hear the gears turning in her head. “It’s not that it’s occupied, sweetie, but no one’s been there in years. I think… no one’s been there since you. It’s probably all old, musty, and dirty.” 

“I���m not hearing a no,” you reply.

“I’m not telling you no,” she agrees. “And I agree with you, it’s a good place for you to hide from him for now. But I’m also saying that it’ll be difficult work to upkeep. It won’t feel like a vacation home.”

You nod. “That’s fine with me, as long as it gives me some time.” 

Your mother agrees to let you stay there, and relief instantly floods your veins. It’s a good, temporary solution for now, and you have fond memories there, both from your childhood and the time shortly after high school. Even if the house is in bad condition, all you need is to breathe some ocean air and a warm bed to sleep in at night. You can make do. 

“Another thing,” you add, merging onto the exit you need to get to the beach. You still have a long way to go. “I think… I think he might try to use you to get to me. And if he does, you should have a plan. I don’t want you getting caught up in this mess.” 

“You don’t need to worry about me,” your mother chides. “I’m tough. I know how to keep manipulative men away from my business.” 

You smile. “Teach me how to do that, next time I’m dating someone.” 

“I ought to teach you before then. It’s a shame that I hadn’t already,” she says, and you can tell she’s smiling fondly just from her voice. “Take care, sweetie.” 

You bid your mother goodbye, thanking her profusely for her help, and you continue on your way. 

It’s a solid three more hours of driving until you arrive at Illusion Bay, where your family’s abandoned beach house is. It’s dark by the time you arrive, and you blink away your bleary exhaustion with tired eyes as you pull in front of the house. 

There are only a handful of buildings along the coastline. The first is your family’s house, which is tiny and quaint, with small windows and a little rocky pathway that leads to the wilderness. The next is a house next door, where two boys around your age used to stay. It’s much bigger and more modern than your own, with sleek floor-to-ceiling windows and a volleyball net, among other things — you remember thinking that it could probably house around ten people, if not more, back when you visited years ago. 

There are a couple of other houses about a mile away, as well as a grocery store, a bar, and a couple of restaurants, but other than that, Illusion Beach is mostly empty. You open your car door gently, basking in the sounds of the tide hitting the sand and breathing in the salty air. 

It’s beautiful enough of a night that you’re completely unsurprised to see that the lights are on next door. You figure that whoever owns the place now must be able to make a fortune through airbnb or a similar service. It doesn’t matter much to you, though — it’s not like the people staying here will get in the way of your hiding and relaxation time if you keep to yourself. 

You pull out the spare key from its hiding spot. When you haul your suitcase inside, you’re met with the same four wooden walls you remember so clearly from your youth. Your eyes scan the perimeter of the room, zeroing in on the grand piano in the corner. 

Your heart squeezes in your chest. So much has happened to you since you were last here — college, relationships, piano competitions, moving in with your fiancé, your broken engagement — but somehow, this house has stayed the same. 

Your eyes find the piano again. Your limbs seem to move on their own, gliding toward the bench, dusting off the surface of the keys, and opening the window before you sit down. 

There’s something you’ve been itching to do. 

A beautiful sound soars through the air, reaching the ears of the eight men staying in the beach house next door. 

Well, the person playing the piano is clearly talented, at least. They pluck away at a lyrical melody with grace and poise, as if music lives and breathes underneath their fingertips. But the instrument itself needs some serious work. It sounds like it hasn’t been tuned in years, certain notes wobbling in and out of stability. 

“I must be hallucinating,” Yeosang murmurs to no one in particular. He’s staring out the window at the shore. He has a hazy, distant look in his eyes, as though he’s reliving a memory.

He can’t quite bring himself to remember it fully, but his mind conjures the memory of a girl he and Wooyoung met years ago at this very same beach. She’d played the piano for them once, getting all flustered when the two of them complimented her. All three of them had been devastatingly awkward back then, but he thinks of that time, of those memories so fondly. 

A childish part of him refuses to let go of those times. Hopes that he might be able to pick up the pieces of what they left behind, before they parted ways. 

A few moments pass. The waves creep up and back on the shore, and the piano strikes an elegant chord. 

“No,” Wooyoung disagrees from the spot next to Yeosang on the couch, just a moment later. “No, I hear it, too. The piano, right?” 

Yeosang blinks at him a couple of times, then scoffs. “A shared hallucination, then.” 

Wooyoung hits him gently on the shoulder. “Don’t be stupid. We can check it out in the morning.” 

“Mmm, alright,” Yeosang says, and leaves it at that. 

Later, about an hour after the piano music has stopped and Wooyoung has curled up in Yeosang’s lap, one of their other friends, San, appears in the doorway. Yeosang raises an eyebrow at his outfit, a tight black tank top that leaves little to the imagination and acid wash jeans that do little to conceal anything in his pants. 

“I’m gonna head out to the bar,” he announces. “Either of you wanna come with?” 

Yeosang shakes his head. From his lap, Wooyoung sighs. 

“Don’t do anything too crazy or Hongjoong’ll kill you,” Wooyoung warns. There’s a clear sense of concern in his eyes, which San seems to dismiss. 

“I never do,” San declares simply, and then he’s out the door. 

You don’t know what compelled you to come here, but you’re glad you came. 

Your family’s beach house, while a welcome reprieve from the apartment you lived in with your fiancé, was still stifling in its own ways. The dust on every surface made you sneeze. The piano didn’t sound right, years of neglect without maintenance making your favorite pieces sound tacky. Worst of all was the feeling like you were being watched by your younger self, like you’d let the little girl inside of you down by existing in an area meant only for memories. 

You decided that you didn’t want to get through the night alone. In a burst of confidence, you decided to go to the bar. You’re only wearing comfortable clothes, so you’re not really dressed for the occasion, but you don’t feel too out of place considering the atmosphere. 

The bar is quieter than you expect — it is a weeknight, but it’s also the middle of the summer, so you’d expected to see more than a handful of people here. Most of the people here are older than you, maybe in their fifties or sixties, and keep to the groups they arrived with. Even still, it’s nice to be around their lively conversations. It sucks you away from your own life and into another world, putting things into a new perspective. 

Everything shifts when a man sculpted from marble walks through the door. 

He is tall and broad, with big, bulky shoulders and a narrow waist that has your eyes bugging out from their sockets like a cartoon character. He is brimming with confidence and bravado, smirking at the bartender as they fire quips back and forth at each other. 

Your pulse quickens under your fingertips when he slides into the stool just a few seats away from you. You feel your heart jackhammering in your chest when his gaze drags up and down your body, taking in your old t-shirt and jean shorts that you’ve been driving in all day and smiling invitingly. 

“Hey,” he flirts, voice as smooth as silk, “can I buy you a drink?”

You’re nodding eagerly before your mind catches up to your body, desperate for some liquid courage in your system. It’s been a while since you’ve been so openly flirted with, openly desired by anyone, your ex fiancé included, and a part of you worries you might be coming across as desperate but most you simply doesn’t care. 

He laughs at your response and it sounds silly (dorky, even), but that only endears you to this stranger more. 

The two of you get to talking over drinks — his name is San, he’s a performer staying in the area with some friends, and he really wanted to meet someone new tonight — and the conversation flows easily at first. You get the sense that he’s charming, but you don’t feel like he’s trying too hard to charm you. It’s easier for you to feel comfortable when it’s clear to you he’s being genuine, so gradually, you feel your nerves ebb away. 

But when the conversation turns to you, you clam up. 

“Your name, at least?” he smiles, revealing a little dimple on the side of his cheek. “And maybe how you ended up here, of all places? It’s not exactly a popular location.”

You decide something at that moment — you feel safe with him, safe enough to let him in a little bit. He doesn’t need to know all of the details, but at the end of the day, maybe a stranger’s comfort is exactly what you need. 

“Y/n,” you concede.  

San’s eyes sparkle a little. “Pretty.”

“Thank you,” you twist at the hem of your shirt. “I, um, I don’t really know how else to say this, but I think you should know something.” 

You glance up at him. You have his attention now, his eyes brimming with quiet curiosity. 

“I’m here because I ran away from my fiancé,” you admit, lowering your voice to a whisper. You feel your gaze flutter away towards the door. It’s more difficult to say it out loud than you anticipated. “Things were bad for a while and it got… really, really messy. I needed to get away from him, from my whole life back home. So I’m kinda in hiding.” 

You feel a light touch, just a brush of fingertips against the back of your hand. When you look back up, San’s eyes are on you, eyebrows drawn low. 

“That must have been a really hard decision to make,” he says. “To just leave everything behind like that.” 

You sigh. “I don’t think it’s fully hit me yet. I’m just worried he might try to find me to take me back, or worse.” 

A beat of silence passes, but it doesn’t feel uncomfortable. Eventually, San strokes lightly at your hand again, just another graze. 

“Y/n,” he asks, his voice softer around your name. “Is this okay?” 

You nod quietly as he encases your hand in his own. Your breath hitches a little at the warmth, how kind and gentle his calluses feel as he rubs back and forth between your knuckles. 

“I know this is going to sound forward. But as long as we’re both here together, I’m here for you,” he comforts, keeping his voice low and intimate. “If you want a shoulder to cry on, someone to kick your ex’s ass, someone to spend the night with,” he winks at you, and you giggle, “anything.” 

A little fire kicks up in your gut at that last option. The drinks are working their magic inside your belly, you think, because suddenly you don’t feel all that shy anymore. 

“Why don’t we have another drink and see where it takes us?” you offer. 

The smile San gives you in return sends a delicious shiver down your spine. 

Another hour or so of conversation with San brings you outside with him. He leads you out of the bar with his arm loosely wrapped around your waist, holding you steady as you walk down the beach. 

You’re not drunk, just a little wobbly, but the alcohol has eased your nerves a considerable amount. You’d even go so far as to say you’re comfortable with him now, which feels like a complete 180 from where you were when he first walked into the bar. 

You blanch, though, when you realize what house he’s directing you towards. Without realizing it, you stop in your tracks, gaping a little at the house next door to your own. 

“What’s wrong, y/n?” San asks, tapping your shoulder gently. He’s been all smiles and flirty whispers in your ear since you left the bar, but he seems to take your reaction as a point of concern. “I can just take you home, if you changed your mind.” 

You shake your head. “That’s not it, I just…” 

Memories come back to you in flashes, striking somewhere deep in your gut. You, sitting at the piano, putting on a little performance for two boys your age when you ran away before college. Your shy blushes as they praised you, their kind touches against your skin, what happened afterwards… 

It’s the most erotic memory of your life. 

Just as soon as the memories surface, though, you swallow them down. That’s not important now, not tonight. 

“I’m actually staying in the house next door, and I’ve been in this house before,” you explain to San. You try to force your voice to sound chipper. “So you kinda surprised me! That’s all.” 

“What a coincidence,” San says, relief in his tone. He squeezes your shoulder. “I think all of us thought that house was abandoned, though.”

“No one’s been there in a while,” you admit, then ask, “wait, what do you mean, all of us? ” 

“I’m staying with some friends right now,” he tells you sheepishly, “but don’t worry, they’re chill, and I know a place that’s pretty private inside where they won’t hear us. C’mon.”

You roll your eyes playfully. “A private place, huh? I bet you I’m not the first person you’ve taken up there.” 

“You are the first, actually,” he smirks, before you can needle him on that, he leads you in. 

You don’t see a single glimpse of San’s friends inside the house, but the space is definitely lived-in. There are plates in the dishwasher, duffel bags on the floor, and, to your delight, music theory textbooks strewn across the coffee tables. You’ve been inside this house before, but it looks markedly different than when you were just out of high school, as if it were remodeled in the time you’ve spent away. 

Before you can see much else, San takes your hand and leads you up a winding staircase. You feel your knees wobble, but he’s there to guide you every step of the way, lifting you in his arms the second you reach the top of the stairs. 

He presses a hungry, needy kiss to your lips as he carries you through the threshold of what you presume is his room, closing the door with his hips. His lips are slick against your own, teasing a quiet, breathy moan out of your mouth as he sucks delicately on your tongue. 

“Such a pretty voice,” he marvels, which has you crumpling against him. 

Then he’s laying you down gently onto the mattress, slotting a knee in between your legs to part them. You’re embarrassed at how wet you already are, hours of flirty conversation winding you up more than you thought. Your fingers twitch along the hem of your own shirt, wanting to get a move on but not knowing how fast San wants to take things. 

“Feeling shy?” he asks, pulling away from you a little to take in the sight of you on his mattress. His hands dance at your clothed sides, sending more delicious shivers in their wake. “There’s no need to be, baby, but if you’re more comfortable, we can do this in the dark.” 

You shake your head. “No, that’s not it. I just… didn’t know how fast you wanted to take things tonight.” 

San huffs out a laugh. “Trust me, I’m okay with anything you’re okay with,” he says. His hand finds your hip, just under the hem of your shirt, and starts drawing little comforting circles against the side of your stomach. “You can take the reins. How do you want me?” 

Your eyes widen at his words. You can’t remember the last time you had even some semblance of control over the pace of sex. Maybe with previous partners, but not with your fiancé. 

In terms of a choice, you can imagine enjoying San doing any number of unspeakable things to you. His hands, from where they graze against your skin, seem practiced and deliberate. You remember the press of his cock against your shorts, too, which makes you feel a little weak in the knees, but most of all… 

Arousal floods inside of you at the idea of coming apart on his tongue. You haven’t been eaten out in ages — your fiancé always insisted on not doing it, which you agreed could be a boundary for you at the time — and you had to admit, you missed it. With San’s confidence, you thought he might be open to eating you out, so…  

“You look like you want something,” San notices, diving in to press a gentle, heated kiss at the corner of your mouth. His thumb rubs a little farther up your body this time, closer to the cup of your bra. “C’mon, tell me baby…” 

“Your tongue,” you whisper, scarcely audible. 

You can tell San hears it by the way his eyes light up, but his smirk is still teasing. 

“You’ve gotta ask me louder, I can’t hear you when you whisper like that.” 

You feel your cheeks go pink. How far was this teasing going to go? Did he want you to beg for it? Did… you like the idea of begging for it, for him? 

“Your tongue, please,” you say, a little louder this time, and then he’s surging back into you, crashing his lips into yours. 

He gets into position, then, between the apex of your thighs, and makes quick work of his shirt and pants. You can see his cock straining against his black boxer briefs, and you allow yourself a little pride in knowing that you did that to him. 

Before you can bask in that feeling, though, he’s dipping his hands under your shirt. 

“Only if you want,” he urges, but you’re pulling it off your body before he can finish. 

After, San unclips your bra, kneading your breasts softly in his hands before kissing at them. You feel yourself grow wetter as he swirls one nipple around his tongue, and then the other, letting you squirm into his touch until your hands find his bare shoulder, squeezing at them in warning. 

“I need you,” you tell him, all breath and want. 

He chuckles a little, lifting your ass gently to put a pillow underneath it, then helps you shimmy out of your jean shorts and underwear. He discards them with a careless fling across the room, his attention taken by your naked form. 

He traces the shape of your curves with his eyes and smiles appreciatively. You swat at his shoulder, feeling a little over exposed but not uncomfortable with it, and then you feel the laugh in your diaphragm melt into dripping desire. 

Then San attaches his lips to your cunt. 

You moan immediately at the contact — actually, it’s more of a low pitched scream, which embarrasses you to no end. San, however, just makes a pleased, intrigued noise against your slit. 

“My ex, ah, he never…” you start, by way of explanation. 

“Bullshit,” San groans into your pussy before you can explain. His tongue traces a titillating pattern up your slit, sending waves of pleasure down the length of your spine. “Fucker had such a pretty, sensitive pussy all to himself and did nothing about it.” 

You moan into the back of your hand, unable to stifle all of the ways he’s making you feel. The dirty talk, his tongue, his unabashed appreciation for your body, it’s almost too much. Your brain is swimming in pleasure, in San, and it strikes you just how lucky you are, that you ended up in bed with him tonight. He was the perfect person to distract you from the hell your life has turned into, and you can’t imagine getting any luckier than this. 

“Baby,” San whispers, his tongue zigzagging against your most sensitive spot. You’re squirming, now, writhing into his touch. “I’m going to put my fingers inside, is that okay?”

“ Please,” you say, a little louder than you intend. 

You’re rewarded with two slick fingers at your opening, pressing into your heat in a slow, gradual rhythm. You groan at the pressure, eyes rolling back as he takes his time with you, working you up to your peak. 

As soon as you spread your legs apart further, his tongue is back on your clit, sucking obscenely between praises of good girl and you take me so well against your most sensitive parts. You feel your orgasm nearing, your back arching to press your heat farther into his mouth. 

“I’m coming,” you cry out, unable to stop the wobble from your lips. “San, I’m coming, I’m—”

“That’s right,” he tells you, spitting onto your clit and rubbing hard and fast with another finger. The stimulation is so much, so good, and suddenly you’re coming with a cry of his name. 

You twitch in his bedsheets as he coaxes you through it, whispering little praises into your cunt. Eventually, when your aftershocks seem to end, he pulls his cock out of his boxers, pumping himself quickly and firmly. 

“San,” you plead, with big, watery eyes. He turns to you and you grab your tits with both hands, putting yourself on display for him. 

“On my chest, please,” you beg, and with a groan he’s shifting, fisting his cock over your breasts. 

He comes in seconds, spurting all over your chest, and you feel yourself flush at the speed of it all — between meeting him, talking and drinking with him, coming back to this house, and ending up on his mattress, you’ve kind of sped through the steps to getting to know each other. But everything feels so good, so right, so different from what you had with your ex. In just a few short hours, San valued you more than your ex fiancé had shown you in years. 

The thought brings a complicated feeling to your gut. But more than anything, you feel spent. You know it’s risky, but you decide to take the chance. You just feel so safe with San, unquestionably so. 

So you fall into a blissful, dreamless sleep in San’s bed. You’re sleeping when he leaves for the bathroom, coming back moments later with a warm washcloth that he washes your chest and intimate parts off with. 

He envelops you in his arms, both of you snoring softly, unaware of what surprises you’d both be met with when you wake up the next morning. 

[poetic-pearls]

Fusebox survey

let's be real for a second: fusebox isn't going to listen to our opinions anyways.

But I obviously took the survey just to be sure, and I'd like to share my "What would you like to see in the new seasons?" answer. I'd love to hear your thoughts or if you have anything to add.

(Don't judge this is my first post)

- Fewer diamond options = having to spend fewer diamonds (it makes me consider not playing anymore)

- Fewer scenes where people want to drag us away to have one-on-one conversations

-The love interests having their own personalities/different things happening/conversations depending on the LI

-better female love interests

-slow-burn romance options

-love interests/other characters not acting like they are married off after being paired up for a few days/weeks

-Love interests who are there just for fun/who might be distant due to uncertainty regarding whether or not they are deserving of love (slow burn??)

- love interests who are sassy (not in a cringey way)

-love interests who don't actually want to be there

-love interests that just want the money

-the possibility of coupling up with friends (to prevent being dumped)

-Teaming up and pretending to be a couple to fool everyone to win!!! (Maybe they fall in love?)

-angst!!!!!!

- Female love interests that are like Angie (the best love interest to ever exist)

- A female love interest who is like Kat (maybe she's in denial about being attracted to women?)

- Female love interest who has internalised homophobia/makes comments towards the player -> character development

- Please stop always creating a female character that hates the Player (I swear they're basically the same person over and over again).

-The possibility that unlikable characters actually talk it through with the Player (ONCE!!!) instead of reverting to the same behavior repeatedly

- Better-looking and free character customization

- Better and more free clothing options

-The possibility of getting compliments for our outfit even if we didn't choose a "diamond" option.

-other characters having multiple outfits

- having actual best friend options (not being forced to be friends with someone)

-being able to be besties with guys

-being able to just be friends with Love interests

- Being able to actually turn down love interests (make two options for turning someone down that sound the same but mean different things: I'm not interested (don't ask again); I'm not interested (might change my mind if you ask again)).

->These options should be available not just the first time, but every time someone makes a move on you

-every love interest being obsessed with the Player when she's locked in with her partner/someone else (stop making everyone act like they are in love with us and then they turn around and reassure their partner how badly they want them when the player doesn't choose them/turns them down (it makes every character seem disloyal and makes people want to stop playing).

-Again: make a female love interest like angie!!!!!!

-more Angst!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-please make another character like hamish

-please, please, please make (obvious) arab/south asian love interests/characters in general

-more country options for our character

-more and better career options (stop making the same ones over and over again)

-LET OUR CHARACTER HAVE A FLESHED OUT BACKSTORY

-PLEASE let us have a 'survey' before the first episode really begins where we can answer questions about our character (many options) that influence/define our backstory (not questions like 'what's your type on paper' more like 'what's your relationship with your parents')

-take more time to fully flesh out the story -> don't immidiently upload another season after the end of the last one-quicker Updates maybe (wednesdays AND sundays/saturdays or two episode at once)

-older love interest options (MOMS!!)

-let us maybe already have children

-being able to choose our age

-LET US HAVE A DISTINCT PERSONALITY (players can have different personalities that influence our choices and journey in the villa/how other perceive us), stop making the MC the same in every season (personalities: bubbly, laid back, unlikeable/just outright rude (no one likes us), nice/people pleaser/doormatt, etc.)

-bigger variety in ages (other characters)

-clothes: streetwear, (lacoste, adidas, etc.) tracksuits, traditional clothing options, elegance (not tacky/ugly glitter dresses), y2k (ayesha erotica), juicy couture, more and better sneaker options (i just want EVERYONE to be able to express themselves and not just always the same style of clothing)

[qcoded]

Small Analysis on Belos/Philip, and the many chances at Redemption he missed.

I think the reason why I loved the scene in Watching and Dreaming were The Collector hugged Belos while saying "I get it! You just need kindness and forgiveness, huh?" was because it encapsulated perfectly how many chances Belos didn't take to fucking redeem himself.

I think we all kinda know that if he was just self aware, and reflected on the shit he did for ONE damn second, maybe, just maybe he could have turned out way better than what ended up happening.

Analyzing his backstory and what we can decide actually happened with Caleb (mostly based on all the pictures that were released from Hollow Mind with additional ones), it's not like he was ever exempt from sympathy, don't get me wrong.

Can't really go into the reality that Caleb, being Philip's sole guardian, most likely abandoned him to go with Evelyn into the Boiling Isles (not with bad intentions but still) since THAT'S a whole 'nother can of worms, but like hey! It's fucking understandable, who wouldn't be hurt by that?

But at the same time, what Belos decided to do, it was all on his own accord.

It was all his own decisions tha he could have actually thought on but no! He was too stuck in his delusional beliefs.

Could have stopped anywhere. After he killed Caleb. After he was tricking and offing witches and demons. After the whole encounter with Luzura/Luz and Gertrude/Lilith. After the making of the Grimwalkers began. After instilling glyphs on witches.

There are probably more examples, but basically, Belos had so many damn chances.

But nope! Never took them.

And again, The Collector was so willing to forgive him, even after manipulating and using this kid for centuries on end. After all the horrific shit that Belos has done, there was still a sliver of hope for him to actually just think, 'What am I doing? '

Of course, that didn't happen. It was a 'Friendship is Magic, but gone wrong' and he attempted to kill The Collector once again.

You know what's the best part of this? That there's a scene that just adds onto what I'm saying perfectly.

Later on when Luz revived into the super cool form that is Titan!Luz, she ripped out Belos from the titan's curse. And when he reformed again, he turned into his Philip Wittebane look.

And he had the fucking audacity to blame that dark magic (presumably his curse) was the one who made him commit all those horrendous acts.

This would make pretty much be his very first, and only attempt towards redemption.

But the thing is, it's too late.

Belos threw out his very last chance at redemption with The Collector.

And now? He has nothing more but than to deal with the ultimate consequences that have been building up.

This is also why I'm not that mad that Belos wasn't shown to finally realize the severity of what he has done, or to feel all that built up guilt flow it.

It's because it shows amazingly how far up his ass he was in his beliefs that even when he was DYING, he was just too fucking stubborn.

The more ironic part, like I mentioned earlier, that 'dark magic' was pretty much just his curse. That I want to mention, is fucking SELF AFFLICTED. Belos was literally the one eating all those Palismen, which are the cause of the curse. He's quite literally blaming himself!

And even though he tried to claim that Luz somehow cured him, got quickly called out on his bullshit when the boiling rain revealed him to still be purely goop.

Till the last minute, he was trying to keep a facade that quite literally, crumbled.

TLDR; Belos ultimately gave up every chance to be a better person, and he pretty much got what was coming for him.

[saffronimagines]

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Female!Reader Reader pronouns: she/her

Era: flashbacks, present day is S11.

Words: 1000+ (they will be get bigger)

Warnings:, violence, language, gore, mentions of death. Tattoos, piercings.

A/N: the chapters will be getting bigger so don't worry, this is more of just backstory.

Summary: Daryl remembers you as he tells carol a story.

2010, August 25th

He was panicking, he couldn’t find you anywhere. He’d went back to your house. Your job at the mechanic, You were simply nowhere to be found.

Merle acted like he couldn’t care less, but in fact, he almost missed you. You made Daryl happy, and Merle loved his nephew, Archer. nonetheless when the brothers found the quarry camp. finding you had been thrown out the window. it's a kill-or-be-killed world.

----------

sometime in 2011.

after the governor, the prison seemed safer.

he hadn't told anyone about you and wasn't planning to. but he'd really gravitated to Carol's energy and spent more time with her. sitting in a guard tower with carol...That's when it happened. he let it slip.

talking about mechanics, and how Daryl knew so much about cars. he was tired, he hadn't registered what he said until he said it. "my wife taught me." her face scrunched. almost not believing him, until he showed no signs of joking.

"you're married?" she whispered, full attention on him as he blushed in embarrassment. "i...was'" he didn't believe you were dead, your or Archer.

"wow. I...I didn't see that coming. you've never brought it up before" Carol smiled, thinking about Daryl as a husband. "ya' know now,'" his southern accent lacing through.

"tell me about her"

North Georgia, June 28th, 1987.

the air was hot, the wind making it even worse. and as if by fate...Merle's bike stopped working.

"My fuckin' bike!" Merle's voice bellowed as he pushed the doors to the bar. Daryl followed behind, not sure if he was even allowed into the place, as he was only nineteen.

"wha' happened this time?" Lucas sighed, blowing the smoke out his mouth. Lucas knew the Dixon brothers quite well, practically growing up with them. "engine started actin' weird as soon as we pulled up" the older brother groaned, sitting next to a new man who sat at the bar.

"who tha' fuck is this?" Daryl asked rudely. "calm down Daryl, this is Norm" "no shit, Norm huh?" Merle dry laughed. drinking a beer the bartender had brought him.

no other words were exchanged until" Lucas nudges the new-comers shoulder. a signal to say "earn your place"

"One of my Workers...she could fix your bike." as if he was put on the spot, he offered. "a chick? yea' no way" Merle's refused, placing the bottle on the sticky table.

"She's my best worker" he looked at his watch. "she could be finished in a few hours, you even don't have to pay" his teeth grind each other, he knew you weren't going to like that.

"fine...give the address" Daryl looked at the address Norm had written on the paper.

you were a woman...? and I've lived in that part of the neighborhood?

-------------------

trapped with Beth in the trunk of a car. if anyone would've asked him where he thought he'd be in two years, he definitely wouldn't have said here. cramped with a teenage girl whose father had just died.

Nonetheless, their time together was short-lived when she disappeared. then finding his chosen family again after separating, at the prison.

Terminus was a huge bust. his both, sad and glad you weren't there. if you were there in a different 'state'...he wouldn't know what to do, or what to say.

the next few events played by quickly, finding Beth, losing Beth, and Aaron stumbling across the group. then taking them to Alexandria.

Alexandria was the exact opposite of where you used to live.

it was clean, nice, and suburban.

North Georgia, June 28th, 1987: 2:54am

as Daryl rode in with Merle on their bike, the neighborhood was worse than he'd ever heard before. dirty, buildings coming down, overgrown, and random loud banging noises.

one knock and no one answered. two knocks and they heard moving. when no one answered, a third knock and you finally opened the door. you looked tired, dressed in sweatpants as well as a long t-Shirt, he watched as your hand leaned against the door, covered in small band-aids, some uncovered cuts, and bruises.

once Merle asked what your name was, your hand clenched. "Norm said ya' could fix ma' bike?" Merle Truly didn't think you could do jack. by the looks of you, you were an alone, useless, teenage girl.

"whoopee.." you smiled sarcastically, the fake smile instantly dropping. head nodding to follow inside, Daryl didn't get a long look at your house before he followed you to the garage.

you crouched over on your ankles and pulled up the garage door. "bring your bike around" Merle's quickly jogged out of the open garage to get his bike from out the front, meaning he would be a minute, you grabbed your toolbox from a nearby shelf before you felt him staring.

"do you need something?" your eyes not leaving the toolbox, "Nah.." picking at his fingers in nervousness. it wasn't every day he found a girl like you. "you sure? by the looks of you, you've got questions" he did, he had tons. and honestly, he was a little scared of you.

"I'm sure.." awkward silence filled the air, Daryl Dixon had never been good in silence. you went back to get tools from shelves and from drawers, "you look so uncomfortable. really just ask, it's making me nervous" Daryl took a seat on one of the counters. "where'd ya' learn to fix bikes" you took a seat next to him, thighs a few inches from each other.

"My father taught me" bringing your knees unto your chin. "he's gone though, 'unfortunately'" you air-quote, he didn't mention your Dad again. he knew the topic too well.

"do you know anything about bikes?" he noticed your eyes shimmer from the bad garage light. "Nah. nothin'" you slightly smiled, and tilted your head, handing him a Wrench, perfectly timed as Merle's bike could be heard down the street.

"I'll teach ya'"

now:

day 31 in the commonwealth

Daryl walked down the stairs to his apartment, where he'd be going to start work. watching as Rosita came down from her own place, then exchanging a quick "hey"

"place getting any better?" Daryl smirked. "hell no, i think this place is literally made of paper." she expressed before following with "you sleeping?"

"Nah, no, no." you would always stay up with him until he fell asleep, then you'd fall asleep a few minutes later, to make sure he was actually asleep.

"can't wait till basics are over and we get new apartments, worrying about money again is so weird" rain poured onto the pair was they walked.

"its not forever" he hoped...

@jasontoddorjasongrace @f1uveryys @4ster01ds @rickysgrimes @letsstarsfalling @2181bigbuss @zomerlovesme @aureolinb @kikitje2003 @mandyjpwood @baldeagle21 @justsomecreaturewandering

[mermaidsirennikita]

besides everything you have brilliantly pointed out, there are also the underlying implications of fran theoretically not being attracted to john but having sex with him. i know they could potentially have a sexless marriage and skip the miscarriage, focusing the future struggle on the grief and guilt of moving on with someone new but... if fran doesn't really love John that would mostly be a michaela pov and we know the show isn't good at exploring the love interests (of color) trauma and motivations. also john has been presented as a sweet man that sees francesca, it would be highly unbelievable if he didn't realize she wasn't into the sex. and it seems ooc for him to keep going with it too even if at the time it happened. so if they do follow the miscarriage/pregnancy route... that could be problematic. not that they care considering what daphne did to simon but still.

First off, thank you!

Second, I've been thinking about my thoughts on this (lol thinking about my thoughts) because I want to be very careful about expressing my opinion on this subject. I know it's very sensitive and I get that, and I don't want anyone to feel dismissed or unheard (and I don't want to at all validate people who are being so homophobic and vile about this).

But yes, I thought about this as well. It seems like we really don't know where Fran and John's relationship is at all at the end of the season, even though enough time has passed for them to forge some kind of physical relationship. And I just feel like... If John was a real character in the script, if his sweet and sensitive nature was honored, then I would IMAGINE that he'd notice something, unless Fran was really good at putting on a good face (and maybe she is).

When you're with someone you care about, though.... if they held off on intimacy, he'd notice that. If Fran didn't like it, I think he'd notice that, too? Which adds some messiness to tacking this on at the end of the season. This needed TIME. It adds to this idea, too, that John isn't a character, because like? He's gonna have feelings too? Not just Fran. There's more to this than FRAN'S feelings.

I would find it really sad if they did keep the miscarriage plot, tbh, if Fran truly isn't physically attracted to him. I don't want to think of her having to put up with or frankly be traumatized by that, and I don't want to think of John being framed as this source of trauma. Besides, that's Sir Philip's thing. And yeah, him being a Black man also MATTERS, and this is something (I say this as a white woman who doesn't identify as straight these days) I really dislike seeing white viewers just sort of dismiss. This is not just a queer love story. This is an interracial queer love story, and frankly, a love triangle that involves two people of color (who happen to be related... again.... And it is interesting how that's happening again, and it does kind of say something in that these show is like "two love interests of color? MUST BE FROM THE SAME FAMILY!". Like, yeah, Kate and Edwina and Michael and John are related in the books, but those aren't actual full-blown love triangles in the books).

I think I'm just so burned by the way s2 handled Edwina and Kate that the idea of them doing a GOOD job with Michaela, especially with her added layer of her being queer in the world the show constructed, is like... I'm skeptical. And maybe that's unfair. Maybe I shouldn't be skeptical. But in general, the Btons' love interests of color have really been notably sidelined in favor of their lovers' arcs, and it was bigger for Kate than it was for Simon. Hey, Simon got a backstory.... Even if his trauma was ultimately subsumed by Daphne's story after she assaulted him.

But hey, I'm happy to be proven wrong. I really hope I will be.

I'll also say, however--I just really think that people need to understand that we can support the gesture while critiquing the writing and the way it's coming together. There are a lot of people who simply hate that they aren't getting Michael, or that there is queerness on the show at all. A LOT. Some people, however, have valid critiques. Some of them are queer people; some of them are people of color; some are both. Critique isn't JUST coming from straight women who want to see Michael.

And I mean, I've already seen a historical romance author who does identify as bi on her Twitter profile and does write actively queer books get dogged out for critiquing it, so.

[bella-rose29]

Not Your Lover - Chapter 8 (final chapter)

Gregor finally gets some backstory (been a long time coming) although it's actually quite depressing (I'm sorry)

shit goes down in this one (both bad and good)

ok edit: this is the last part of this series (I know 😭), there's a better explanation on the master list if you would like, but thank you to everybody who has liked, commented, reblogged, or even just read and enjoyed <3

Word count: 4.2k

Warnings: swearing, the mother is (you guessed it) still a bitch, mentions of death, mentions of a stillborn, grief, Gregor sees Nik as a son (I cried writing that honestly he's so sweet), the mother gets her ass verbally handed to her, idk what else there is other than it's only been proof-read once

Tag list: @a-candle-maker, @bish-lasagna, @bubybubsters, @el-de-phi, @hauntedenthusiasttragedy, @iambored24601, @itsyoboo-jassy, @karensirkobabes, @kentucky-criedfricken, @little8sun, @mrsklockwood, @mvidaaaa, @nalie-98, @naushtheaspiringauthor, @notoakay, @pietromaximoffsbabe, @shadowwolf202101blog, @simbaaas-stuff

As always, let me know here if you would like to be added to/removed from my Nikolai tag list <3

series master list

Y/n was having a shit day.

She hadn't seen Nik- Nikolai, since he'd told her who he was the day before, and she felt awful about how she'd dealt with it. It was irrational, really, since she knew that he wasn't Davor, but the doubts about what else Nik- Nikolai (Saints, that was still difficult to get her head around) was lying about were creeping in. Her mother's presence in the mansion at the moment was doing absolutely nothing to help.

"-and Davor says that he overheard the two of you the night of the faire, you know, when I found out that the two of you were 'together', and Davor says that he heard you talking about how you were going to pretend to date so that you could use me for your grant! And Davor says tha-"

"Saints, mother! Stop talking about Davor! 'Davor says this' and 'Davor says that', it's exhausting just listening to you!" Y/n was working on the third room, the deadline closing in far too fast for her liking.

Everything would be easier if Nik was helping.

She shook her head in an attempt to clear her thoughts of him, and went on stubbornly ignoring her mother's incessant rambling, picking up a brush and painting the walls. The entrance hall and first front room were done, but they'd taken longer than she'd expected and now it was a rush to get the third and fourth rooms done in six days. In fairness, she only really had to put the final coat of paint on these walls and finish tidying up and then the second front room was done. It was the final room that was stressing her out, since it needed clearing out, floors replacing, furniture replacing, everything replacing, really, and she'd barely touched it.

Her father had promised to help, which she would be eternally grateful for, but even with somebody lending a hand Y/n had no clue how she would ever get the project done in time.

"You know, I should have expected something like this from you. You're a terrible daughter, do you know that? All I ever wanted was the best for you and you had the audacity to lie to me and take me for granted."

Y/n stopped her work again to stare up in incredulous shock at the woman that called herself her mother. "What? I'm a terrible daughter? You do realise that the only reason that any of this has happened is because of you, right? Because of your failings as a mother?" She stood up, hoping that she looked intimidating.

"How dare you insinuate that-"

"I fucking dare. Get the hell out of my property." Y/m/n wasn't moving, but neither was Y/n, and after a few moments the older woman seemed to realise that she'd lost this fight and left.

~~~

Gregor had smacked Nik for the third time that day, and it was barely lunchtime.

"Focus, boy!"

He felt bad about hitting him on the back of his head, but at the same time Nik hadn't been concentrating and was about to saw his fingers off, so Gregor thought that it was fair.

"Sorry," the younger man muttered, clearly still not with it.

"What's up with you?" Gregor asked, tone softening. "C'mon. If it's gonna stop you working effectively then we'll talk about it." Nik sighed, turning in his seat at the workbench, and for the first time that day Gregor could see the exhaustion in his eyes.

"I told Y/n. She didn't... she didn't take it too well. And Davor and Y/m/n have started going around saying we were faking it-"

"You were though?" Gregor said, confusion lacing his voice.

"Well, yeah, but the point was that nobody was meant to know that. Although I did tell you pretty early on which kind of defeated the point, but you're good at keeping secrets so I felt safe telling you." Gregor's heart swelled at the words and at the knowledge that Nik trusted him enough to share something he wasn't supposed to. It hadn't been long after Nik's first appearance in Taya that Gregor started seeing the man as a son, helping to fill the hole in his heart that had been empty for so long. His wife had died during the birth of their firstborn son, only for the baby to be stillborn. Gregor had been wrecked, despondent and reserved, and eventually he'd moved out to Taya, hoping that the sea air would heal him. Work had kept his mind off of his past, but every now and then he'd be reminded of the two of them and had to close the shop, sitting in his grief all day doing nothing but staring blankly at a wall and periodically crying, his head in his hands. But Nik, bright and shining Nik, had been the son that Gregor never got the chance to meet, and so knowing that Nik felt that he was somebody he could talk to filled the older man with joy.

"Anyway," Nik continued. "I said I'd give her space. It wasn't the best time to tell her, to be honest, because Davor and her- Y/m/n were giving her shit, and then Evalina appeared, and I think it was just a lot to take in all at once." Gregor didn't miss the way that Nik stopped himself from calling Y/m/n 'Y/n's mother', and he found that, despite having known the woman for years, he agreed that she had been too despicable the past few weeks to be called a mother to anybody.

"Well, can you still help out with the mansion? I know she's stressed about that since she's got a whole room left that she hasn't touched and maybe that'll help her figure things out?"

"I don't know. I'd have to go when she's not there, I think. Otherwise I'll feel that I'm pressuring her into an answer or something."

"Well, she normally gets back here around seven bells, and heads out around five in the morning to get the bakery open. Not ideal hours for you to go and help out at the mansion, but I'll let you slack off a bit in the morning if you're tired."

"You sure? Thank you, Gregor. Really. I was going to ask where she's staying, too. She's here then?"

"Yeah. I've got a spare bedroom upstairs. Not the nicest, but at least the heating works," he joked, knowing full well that the hotel heating was complete shit. He'd tried many times to fix it, but somehow (he suspected the owners were Grisha and deliberately breaking it to avoid paying heating bills) it always ended up worse than before. Nik huffed a laugh, a small smile creeping onto his face. "Come on," Gregor said. "Let's get this desk sorted, yeah? If I remember rightly they're coming tomorrow morning to pick this up."

~~~

That night, Nikolai made the short walk to the mansion.

The street lamps dimly lit the way, making the shadows lengthen and concealing people walking along the pavements, but Nikolai wasn't afraid.

Not when he had his demon on high alert for any sign of danger.

Thankfully they made it to the building without incident, although Nikolai could have sworn that Davor was following him, and once they were inside he let his demon out.

"You're helping, alright? You can fuck around a little bit while I get started, but when I need your help, you help, okay?" His demon nodded, stretching out his wings and immediately running off into the bowels of the house. Nikolai sighed, then headed into the back room to make a start on clearing the space.

~~~

"What the fuck?"

Y/n was standing with her father in the mansion just after eleven bells the next day, staring at the empty fourth room.

"Do you... do you know what happened, Dad?"

"Uh... nope. Looks like somebody wants you to get this finished though. Not sure why they wouldn't just... come and help during the day," he frowned, shifting the toolbox he carried. Y/n frowned for a moment too, until she realised who was most likely to do something like this.

"Well," her father declared, striding forwards. "Let's not waste time! We need to get these floorboards up and replaced! Come on!"

The next hour or so was spent doing just that, ripping up floorboards with much more aggression than was needed (both Y/n and her father were taking out their anger on the job), and by the time Y/n had to go back to the bakery they'd stripped the whole room and had made a start on laying the new boards. She was just stepping into her shop when Evalina appeared, and it took a tremendous amount of willpower on Y/n's behalf to not punch the woman in her stupid face right then and there.

"Hi, Y/n. So Nik is single, yeah? Because I would love to see what he's like as a lover."

"Fuck off, Evalina." Y/n walked around the counter, tying on her apron. "Unless you wanna buy something?"

"I'm not hearing anything saying I can't be with him, which is perfect! I'll go find him now!" She ignored Y/n's protests and pranced to the door, but didn't get a chance to open it and rush down the street because a woman had thrown her arm out. Holding the door closed, she raised an eyebrow at Evalina, her other hand resting lightly on one of the axes at her belt.

"You're gonna do no such thing, alright? Go and find some other poor sod to run after, because he is a taken man," the woman threatened, and Evalina paled slightly when an axe was lifted and held up to her throat, nodding so hard Y/n thought her head might go flying. Satisfied, the woman released the door and let Evalina disappear around the corner, watching her go, then turning to face the counter. "You're Y/n L/n, right?"

"Uh, yeah. Who are you?" she asked with a frown. How did this random woman know who she was?

"Tamar Kir-Bataar. You're in contact with Nikolai, correct?"

"No. Well, yes. Well, no. It's complicated," she finished with a sigh.

"But you know where he is? Because I need to find him and the little shit is being evasive. Does he ever open his mail?"

"Um, I don't- I don't know? Wait," Y/n frowned, picking up on something. "How do you know he's Nikolai?"

Now it was Tamar's turn to frown, clearly unsure what the situation was. "Because I used to work with him? Until he ran off into the countryside. Took a good while to track him down, sneaky bastard. He was always good at disappearing."

"Wha- okay." She huffed a sigh, pressing a hand to her forehead. "Well, he's probably at Gregor's, the mechanic. Although he could be taking a lunch break, but I don't know where he'll be if he is. Why do you need to find him?"

"The crown needs him. Urgent business. I'm not obliged to say any more than that, I'm afraid. Thanks for the help," she smiled, heading for the exit. The bell on the door chimed behind her, and Y/n replied to an empty room.

"You're welcome."

~~~

Nikolai dropped his spanner when Tamar walked in and called his name, which was unfortunate because he was on his back, and therefore the tool fell on his face.

"Fuck," he muttered, clutching his nose.

"You alright down there?"

"Yep, all good!" he called, hoping she couldn't hear the pain in his voice as he pushed himself out from under the carriage he was fixing. "Not that it's not lovely to see you, Tamar, but what are you doing here?"

"Zoya needs you. We've been trying to contact you for weeks now, but you haven't replied."

"When you say contact...?"

"Letters, mostly. Have you just not been reading your mail, Nikolai?"

"I haven't been getting mail. And just Nik would be great. People don't know who I am here, stops any assassination attempts. Well, Gregor knows, actually, but I doubt he's going to kill me."

"...Okay. Well, we need you to be Sturmhond for a little while. Shit's going down with the Kerch and they're refusing to loan us money right now despite our crippling debt because they don't like Zoya being on the throne."

"But they were fine with it when I abdicated a month or so ago. Why are they complaining now?" He wiped his hands on a nearby cloth, frowning at Tamar.

"They've got some new people on the council, and apparently they're really anti-Grisha. We need you to convince them otherwise and get those loans." Nikolai sighed, bracing himself against the workbench.

"I can't just uproot my life here, Tamar. I've got... stuff."

"Look, your girlfriend will still be here when you get back. You'll only need to be gone for what, two weeks at most?"

"My girlfr- oh, you mean Y/n."

"Yeah. Who else would I be talking about?"

"I don't know," he sighed, exasperated. Everything was happening far too quickly and all at the same time, and he had no idea what to do about any of it. On top of all of that, he was apparently meant to be receiving mail, none of which had arrived. "Look, I can't leave now. I've got jobs in the garage I need to finish off and the deadline for Y/n's project is in five days. Just give me until after then, okay?"

"We can't wait that long, Niko- Nik. There's trouble in Kerch and you're the only one good enough at getting what you want to fix it."

"There's always trouble in Kerch. Can't you send our good friend Kaz after them? He could threaten them in the middle of the night with murder or something."

"Kaz won't do it unless we pay him an inordinate amount of money," Tamar grumbled, and Nikolai couldn't help but think what a good idea that was.

"Five days, Tamar. And I'll give my most convincing speech yet, how's that?"

"Fine. But I want you going straight there, no detours. We're already behind thanks to your missing mail."

"Yeah, I'll look into that. I have my suspicions on who could have been intercepting my letters."

"I'm going to make the journey back. Five days. And then you make a move," she pointed a finger at him, stern look on her face.

"Five days." Five days to finish the third and fourth rooms. Five days to get Y/n back onside.

No pressure, then.

~~~

That night, Nikolai headed back to the mansion, his demon scurrying across the rooftops out of sight from pedestrians.

He spent most of his time laying the rest of the floorboards, then painted the walls with a first coat in the colour that Y/n had left with a note saying 'Room 4 walls'. His demon was helpful, or at least trying to be, picking up a brush in his mouth and attempting to paint the walls, but when Nikolai saw how haphazardly the job had been done he gave a tut and let the demon wander off and explore the rest of the mansion.

It was strange, how friendly the two of them were now.

Since the events within the Fold things had been different, almost as if now that they were two beings sharing one body they had to learn to get along or go mad instead. Nikolai had previously thought that he'd never be pleased to see the demon, or enjoy its company when it was a reminder of what he had suffered at the hands of the Darkling, but every now and then when it went quiet in his head he grew concerned, or when it chased after its own tail like a dog he laughed, and sometimes, in the depths of the night when nightmares kept Nikolai awake, the demon would curl up around him, offering what comfort it could.

Watching it now, he wondered how they were ever not this close. It was sort of like having a large cat, Nikolai thought. One that didn't shy away from a spot of murder.

The sound of stones being kicked made both man and demon swivel their heads to the entryway of the mansion, and Nikolai paused with the paintbrush mid-air.

"Hey, easy," he whispered to the demon, hoping it would take the hint and stop growling. Footsteps sounded, louder than the stones, and after a moment Y/m/n appeared. Nikolai was surprised to see her, not expecting her to turn up this late at night. He felt his demon hide itself in a corner, the long shadows helping conceal its dark form.

"Hello, Nik."

"Y/m/n," he said tightly, suppressing a grimace. "How can I help you?" He didn't bother disguising the contempt in his tone, no matter how schooled his expression was, and she noticed.

"You can start by going home. This is Y/n's project, not yours."

"Bullshit. She's just the manager of it. Anyone can help."

"Well, she needs to grow up. A child's dream is just that. Perhaps I entertained her fantasies too much when she was younger, but this has gone on long enough and I need to put a stop to it. So, put the paintbrush down, and go to bed. She needs to do this on her own, and when she inevitably fails she'll come home. Back to me."

Nikolai couldn't stop the laugh of disbelief that came out of his mouth, and now he made sure that she could see every emotion on his face. "You really think that she'll go back to you?" When Y/m/n nodded he only scoffed. Maybe she hadn't heard him properly at the market the other day. "You are delusional. You put her down, crushed her, destroyed her, and made her hate you with every fibre of her being, and now you think that she'll forget every comment, every moment where you made her feel like she wasn't a good enough daughter, and act as though nothing happened? No, I'm talking," he said when she tried to interrupt, his tone hardening. "You have ripped your family apart, and there is no amount of grovelling that you can do to get it back. You tore our relationship, too. Yes, it was fake to start with, but our feelings are real. So real that it fucking hurts to know that she has a mother like you, because you don't deserve her. I don't deserve her, but at least I know that she's the best I'll ever do and that I need to worship her like the goddess she is. You don't recognise that you've done anything wrong. And if you ever talk about her like that again, I will make good on my words from the other day. I will find you, and I will ruin you. Because she is the love of my life, and if she'll have me, my future wife. There's nobody but her for me." He paused, chest heaving from the realisation of what he'd just admitted. "We're done here. You can go." Y/m/n looked surprised at the dismissal, but the authority that had crept into Nikolai's voice made her scurry off into the night, her metaphorical tail between her legs.

The demon slunk back into the light, nuzzling up to Nikolai's hand in what felt like pride and comfort, and he was so preoccupied with giving it chin scratches he didn't notice the second figure that had been lingering outside the mansion.

~~~

"Nik? You here?"

"He's out," a voice replied, and Y/n deflated slightly when she recognised it as Gregor. "Went to get lunch. He should be back in about-" he checked his watch, then said "ten minutes. Do you wanna wait?"

"Uh... yeah, sure. Thanks, Gregor." She perched on a chair in the waiting area, anticipation making her buzz with energy. She couldn't sit still, leg bouncing and gaze darting around the room, and every second that passed felt agonisingly slow.

After seven minutes (and thirty-four seconds, although she definitely hadn't been counting) Nik walked in, and he froze with his eyes wide when he saw Y/n waiting in the shop. She stood up quickly, opening and closing her mouth as she tried to start the speech she'd been planning all morning. Gregor walked back out into the main shop after disappearing into the back rooms to fetch supplies, and upon noticing the two of them stood staring at each other, he excused himself, offering up his office as a quieter space for them to talk. They accepted, clumsily thanking him at the same time and walking hesitantly over.

Nik closed the door behind them, and despite the large room Y/n felt cramped, the air heavy with the words she couldn't find the strength to say just yet.

"How have you been?" he asked, his voice quiet. He wasn't looking at her, and she was stubbornly refusing to look at him, but she could picture his exact expression.

"I heard you last night." She winced, not meaning to start there. He didn't say anything, and after a few moments of no sound but the clock in the office loudly ticking she braced herself and glanced up. "Nik? I didn't mean to say it like that. I just- the first night, when I came in in the morning and the room was clear, I assumed it was you, so I came over the next night to make sure, and also to talk to you, I guess. But then my mum was there and I was about to turn around and leave, but then you started talking to her and saying all those things and-" she broke off when he met her gaze, taking a breath.

"How... how much did you hear?" His voice was hoarse, like he was trying to hold back his emotions.

"From around when you told her she was delusional." She bit her lip, nerves taking over the small wave of confidence she'd just had.

"Right." Nik cleared his throat, reaching up to run a hand through his hair. "And... do- what-"

"I love you, Nik. And I wanna try being with you, for real. I can't promise that I won't be wary, and I can't promise that I won't doubt you at times, but I can promise that that isn't your fault, it's Davor's. And I can promise that should you ever propose, I'll say yes." He took a shuddering breath, a shaky smile forming on his face as he took a step towards her. Y/n wasn't sure who moved after that, but somehow they ended up meeting in the middle, arms wrapped around each other as he held her face and kissed her like he'd never let her go again. They parted after a while, taking heaving breaths and resting their foreheads against each other. Nik didn't move his hands from her cheeks, and Y/n slid hers up to cover them where they sat, linking their fingers the best she could.

"I love you," he whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to her lips. "I love you."

"I love you too. Just no more lies, yeah? I'm not sure I can handle that."

"Got it. No more lies." He went quiet for a moment and then said: "Is now a really bad time to tell you that I need to leave for two weeks?" Y/n pulled back so that she could search his eyes, huffing a laugh when she saw how concerned he was.

"I think it's a great time, actually. Does this have anything to do with that woman? What was her name... Tamar?"

"Yes. Apparently I'm the only one who can talk a nation into being cooperative. I've managed to make it so that I don't have to leave until after the deadline, though, so I can keep helping out."

"You didn't have to do that, Nik. Really."

"What, and leave you wondering where I'd gone? No thank you. You'd most likely murder me when I got back."

"I would never!" she exclaimed, laughing when he gave her a look that said he knew she was lying.

"Oh, you so would, darling." She'd forgotten how sweet the name sounded, sending her heart into a flutter.

"Hm, maybe," she murmured into his lips, moving her hands to wrap around his neck and hold him in place (not that he needed much encouragement). They only broke apart because Gregor coughed very loudly in the doorway, an unimpressed look covering up the smile he was attempting to hide.

"If the two of you could refrain from using my office as a room to fuck in that would be brilliant." Y/n snorted, and Nik nodded, both of them flushing at the thought. "Great. Nik, back to work. Y/n, I'll see you at dinner."

He swung the door shut behind him, leaving Nik and Y/n holding back laughter in the office.

[jmrothwell]

Fic writer asks:

4, 11, 16, 24, 44, 70

(there are too many great questions!)

Thank you thank you! They are really good questions!! (found here)

Long post is long so there's a read more cut. (Question 16. (How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?) gets especially long because I decided I want to discuss all my WIPs.)

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

This is a wonderful question, and honestly it depends. Some ideas definitely are me reading or watching something and forming an AU around that. Sometimes it's listening to music and a vibe strikes me that I am like I must write a story that fits this vibe. Other times, I'll be daydreaming and a single scene will pop into my mind and haunt me until I write it down which usually leads to creating the world and circumstances to allow that scene to happen. Sometimes I get an impulsive (in the cases of my darker angstier stuff intrusive thought) and my brain is like wouldn't that be messed up? (Like Crash Pad, Ch 11 solely happened because I built the backstory for the POV character and brain went, you know what't be really screwed up?)

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

Oh geez. But there are so many good fics!! At this moment the immediate top 3 that jumped in my head were:

-It's a supernatural delight by @invisibleraven (JatP fic) -Trip of My Life (Every Time You're Touching Me) by @daintyduck99 (JatP fic) -Prince Charming's Jacket by hitechlatte (Rise TMNT fic)

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

So most of my fic ideas are in some WIP phase. (I'm serious when I saw I need a focus schedule to help me out) We Run Together - This next chapter is all Reggie being all anxiety riddled because Cam and Bobby take him shopping . . .still not sure if we're gonna get to the plane ride this chapter or next. Bobby's first since turning and Reggie's first period. . .it's a miserable affair for the two of them. I have this mental image of them during a layover just sprawled in the waiting away noses shoved in some sort of fast food bag or peppermint bag fighting off the queasiness of being trapped in a metal tube with a bunch of people, including young kids. . Hello Baby June, Goodbye Heart - I keep going back an reading what we have for the next chapter and all our notes. I don't know how much Ash is ok with me gushing about details bu I'll just say the stuff we've got planned it's literally that meme of "give me fic. 'you have to write it.' no write only fic." A lot of of my JatP wips are on rotisserie skewers in my brain right now, rotating, coming into view, reminding me of their presence, enticing me to work on them. And they ALL have moments that I am like, you were the scene! The reason I started this fic in the first place and I still haven't gotten to you yet!! . Crash and Burn - Gotta get through this last chapter of Crash Pad, which is gonna be fun. But then Glowing Embers!! Aaaah, the Donnie POV side of Crash Pad!! Especially Ch 9-11 of Crash Pad like I am at that point of must write this that I have worked myself into a frenzied state where writing is no longer possible . Finally the Donnie Double AU - This AU has so much angst potential. Right now I have two planned fics for it. An unnamed one where Mikey goes after the Donnie Duplicate to try and coax him back to the lair. Only instead he sets him off. And like I said, it gets angsty. The Donnie Duplicate 1000% believes he is OG Donnie, it is hardwired into him, no amount of evidence is going to convince him otherwise. Also hardwired into him is the belief that the only way to get his life back is to kill the entity that stole it from him i.e. OG Donnie. Which leads me to the second planned fic Meant to Be(working title, it may change). This is the reader insert(possibly OC) led fic. Essentially the premise is Donnie Duplicate runs into MC, and initially begins clinging to them out of an 'I just lost my entire support system' desperation that turns into a really unhealthy obsessive possessiveness. When I say it is pulling a lot of vibes, especially the planned ending, from Meant to be Yours from Heathers the Musical I ain't lying. In fact most of the vibe songs I am pulling for this lean into dark and angsty feels. Straight up have been listening to a song called Stalker's Tango on a loop for planning parts of this fic

24. Worst writing advice anyone ever gave you?

Hmmmmmm, this ones tough, if it was bad advice I most likely purged it from my mind. The thing is sometimes what is great advice for one person and their way of writing may be terrible advice for some one else. Like even the write daily advice, I think this is great advice. But it needs to be tailored to some extent. When I got back into fic writing I worked myself to the point where I am now needing to reevaluate my expectations of me and my writing. Because I can no longer keep up with the way I wrote a few years ago. The same advice I would have thought was great then would kill me now.

44. What mistakes do you keep making no matter how many times your beta corrects you?

This question would be easier if I had a regular beta XD. Personal mistake of my own that I keep noticing, I don't let the story breath enough.

70. When asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

I have no hesitations telling people I write. I might not always discuss what the stories themselves are. But the brilliant thing about fanfiction is I don't have to, I can just talk about the joy of exploring the characters outside of canon, exploring how they would behave in different circumstances. At my sister's wedding a couple years ago, most people didn't even care about the what I was writing, more on the how I found the time. Because this was when I was in peak production mode, where I was slowly burning myself out with the sheer amount of writing I was doing without pacing myself at all.

[jadetheblueartist]

IM SO SORRY I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED YOUR TEGAN ASK

I feel so bad :( you said it took you three hours and also I had written a huge response and now it’s gone ;-;

Okay so I’m going to rewrite my response but I’m really sorry if I get things wrong since now I can’t review what you sent ;-;

————

I LOVE THE IDEA SO MUCH!!!! And I would love to hear more about their training and life on the ship!

I may be obsessing over Talon and Megan a tad bit…

I love all the possibilities of how they passed the time in the car so much. It would be so awkward at the start and I’m all here for it!! I imagine Talon carried most of the conversation from the beginning until after they really got to know each other. I feel like at the start Talon would just awkwardly try to tell her what has happened to the earth while she was gone in hopes of starting some conversation. I’m imagining the parking lot picnic with them just drinking slushees and eating whatever gas station food seemed good (I’m assuming everything is kind of run down?)

Car karaoke. Oh it would be amazing. Talon trying to find songs Megan likes and trying to get her to sing along, windows rolled down, it’d be such a vibe.

With the race scene I can’t stop picturing the scene from princess bride where they both are rolling down the hill XD

Their relationship is so great, two strangers bonding in a long car ride… oh wait they already knew each other? They were already in love from book one? But Megan’s memory was wiped- WAIT NO THEY WERE IN LOVE AND HER MEMORY WAS WIPED!?!? Okay, okay, it’s fine at least they became close again, just a fresh start nothing to worry about… HER MEMORY WAS WIPED A SECOND TIME!?!? TALON THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD!?!?!? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (this is so tragic but I love it so much)

Talon nooooo why the tragic backstory ;-; (I love it very much)

Oh and the art? I LOVE IT SO MUCH!! I love Talon’s design!!!!!! The drawing of him saying happy birthday to himself makes me so sad ;-;

Also question time!

Do you have designs for the sci fi ppl? Are they like aliens or just advanced humans chilling in space? Does Talon hide his tattoo? (I love that type of angst so much mhm hidden scars [in this case a tattoo tho]) and you said there was an image limit… could I see those drawing you couldn’t show? Also why is it called Tegan (is it bc Talon + Megan = Tegan…)? That should be all of my questions…

Anyway I absolutely love this story and please feel free to tell me more whenever! (I’d love to hear a lil more about Ivan too)

Again really sorry abt deleting the ask ;-; I hope you have an amazing day though!!

(I feel like I’m forgetting things I wanted to mention but idk)

Oh my I wrote out this whole thing and it deleted it for me hahaha let’s try this again

No worries about deleting the ask it happens hahaha and it doesn’t look like you got anything wrong so yay!

I’m gonna answer this paragraph by paragraph

-IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT and I’m pretty sure I have either the original google doc or a “Megan’s POV” doc that I can look into to give you those details :)

-I’m so glad you’re obsessing so we can be in the same boat

-I’ve been mulling over that car scene for years and somehow you managed to squeeze out even more serotonin for me to devour I thank thee. And I think it’s run down ish, like people are still there but WW3 is kind of happening/ just happened soooo you know

-it would be the vibiest ^^

-I’m so glad you said that bc I couldn’t connect the dots as to what that scene reminded me of but yeah that’s amazing

-IKR the mind wiping rocked my world. My friend was at the point where she was writing the post separation explosion and we were on face time and she casually mentioned “oh you know the cars weren’t the first time they met, right?” I went feral trying to get all the info out of her hahaha

-yes his backstory makes me so sad…

-I’m glad you like the design! It was our group’s “hot guy” design hahaha I’ve tried to make it more individualized to him over the years tho, and that happy birthday one gets me every time (especially since that’s probably how he spent most his birthdays…)

Yay Question Time!

-I believe I could at least get the designs for those people sometime soon. They are just random people who decided to work for big bad (aka the voice, bc they only heard his voice through speakers at first). The voice decided he could make some good money abducting children and forcing them to be assassins so he did that. The government doesn’t know about them bc they hide in space. The few organizations trying to take them down are the only ones who really know about it

-talon has a few different tattoos, the one he got initiated with is a tattoo/ permanent burn so it has to stay covered to protect it, the other is just on his neck and he leaves that one in the open (I can point it out in the pics below)

-and yes! Tegan is the ship name for Talon and Megan (it was that or Melon hahaha)

-Ivan didn’t really have much personality in the oh other than he was angry bc the scientist that snuck into the escape ship was dating his crush, I’ve made some personal modifications to him in my head though making him more protective rather than just angry (he’s also Megan’s cousin) and I just remembered I have a drawing of him? So cue the picture section :)

Picturesssss

Here’s Ivan, the permanent third wheel (he doesn’t know tho)

The first ever drawings of Talon and Megan 😬

Moving on… idk which of these are repeats so lemme know if they are and I could probably substitute them for new pics

And now the og Megan design vs the much needed redraw

Ughhhh the one on the left still haunts me…

I was struck by the limit again so I might reblog this with a few more, idk hahaha

But reading through this ask made me so happy you have no idea (insert the “I don’t normally feel things but that one got through” donnie gif)

Thank you so much and I’ll look into the daily life on the ship and the sci fi guy designs :)

[elbdot]

Jesus christ so hey congratulations on completing tha dubs! Excited to experience them later this month 😄

I do want to take this opportunity tho to ask about your overall thoughts on S&V? Like what you think of the stories, characters, and....Paldea's possible inclusion in these comics 👀?

Excited to hear your thoughts!

OKAY I've gotten a bunch of Pokemon S&V Questions since November and now that I FINALLY played through the game I can FINALLY answer them HERE WE GO

POKEMON SCARLET AND VIOLET IS... GOOD

IS REALLY GOOD

It has some really nice storylines, some weaker, some stronger, I REALLY liked the characterization of all the Team Star Admins (even though the team's backstory is a bit all over the place), Arven was my favorite, followed by Nemona and Penny is- Penny is certainly there 😶

Geeta is not really a memorable champion...I don't really care much for her, but I do find it interesting that she's apparently quite unpopular amongst the Gym leader for her strict management. I don't think we ever had an in-universe unpopular Champion before.

My favorite part of the game was undoubtedly exploring the region with my Pokemon! Taking on the Gyms was more of a chore I had to do to be able to catch and train higher leveled Pokemon but I gotta say, the Gym challenges were always really fun and sometimes I reseted my game just to play the mini-games again :D

But I THINK I spent the most time trying to take selfies and pictures of me and my Pokemon whenever something fun happened or I found a really nice location or the sun was about to set. Taking photos is a HUGE hobby of mine and games that give me this kind of freedom with the photo-option are a HUGE plus in my book (You have NO idea how much time I spent in the USUM Photo Club Mini game)

I gotta say tho the Pokemon of this Region...?

BIGGEST weak point in my opinion. WEIRDEST bunch I've ever seen. Weird doesn't always have to mean BAD but in this case...yeah no there were a lot of weird AND bad ones in there, sometimes great concepts but VERY STRANGE execution that left a lot to be desired for me personally.

I was very open to what kind of Pokemon I would catch in this game. I ended up having only ONE new Paldean Pokemon on my team. And it wasn't even an all new Pokemon, it was Paldean TAUROS :'D Gotta say tho, I never cared THIS much about Tauros before. REALLY love my big black bull (ye I have the regular one, the rare ones are cool but I fell in love with this big fella)

I had a Kilowattrel and Amarouge on my team for a bit, but I switched them out after a while, I was really hoping I'd click with Amarouge more, but in the end I gave space for old and familiar faces instead. Kilowattrel I really like tho! But the fact I could walk around and interact with some of my favorite Pokemon overworld made me SO obsessed with adding them onto my team, THIS is the kind of Pokemon experience I've been waiting for for quite a while :DD

I haven't played through post game yet and I haven't finished all of the school classes yet, but I'm looking forward to complete them, as the cast of this game is really vast and fun!

In case of the comics however, just like with Galar I don't think we'll see an inclusion of this region within the story. Given the narrative of Scarlet and Violet, it would also be difficult to tie in its story with those of EAA and to be honest - I know you guys want to see El and her friends in other regions, which is very sweet, I'm happy you care so much about her that you want to see them travel around the world! But...I NEVER felt the desire to make this comic a world travel tour and I don't really understand where this idea came from that so many people expect El to leave Alola any time soon :'D

"El's Alolan Adventures" will continue to be about El's Adventures in Alola :'D I still love Alola and since El is currently Alolas Champion, she doesn't have any plans to leave the region any time soon and there are still SO many stories to tell with the cast of the Alola region! DON'T FORGET Gladion's Arc I still need to finish!!

HOWEVER

I THINK it's a fair assumption that you'll definitely see SOME fanart from me for this region :D In fact, you can already see my first (ANIMATED) piece on patreon! ☺️

AND I'll show a few more of my "travel pictures" as I've taken...A LOT of them... BUT YEAH Pokemon Scarlet, best main-line game since Sun and Moon for me!! OH and Legends of Arceus was REALLY FUN too of course

[tiktowafel]

Hey, I love your art style and your work on class 1B. I was just wondering if you have any recommendations for fics that are 1B centric, maybe even stories with someone like Setsuna as a main character. I love the MHA fandom, but it's sometimes hard to find those good stories with all the fan generated content, an I was hoping another 1B lover would know what's what.

thank you, and sure! i don't actually read that much fanfiction (my taste is rather narrow), but here are a few ones that i read and enjoyed! i'll put it all under the cut because my summaries ended up making this list kinda long lol

'Class 1-B' is Trending #1 in Japan - 9k words and absolutely hilarious crack oneshot with a lot of chatfic/social media elements. Tsuburaba accidentally turns one of Monoma's rants into an international meme, which results in 1-B becoming incredibly popular and the League of Villains being defeated in the dumbest way imaginable. the fic is restricted to AO3 users, since i don't have an account there i can't check if the link works but i really hope it does :'D

Adrift - long (13k words) and extremely angsty space horror oneshot with Setsuna as the main character. AU where class 1-B are a space crew and a mission goes terribly wrong, leaving Setsuna, the sole survivor, floating hopelessly in space and thinking about everything that happened. 10/10 made me feel extremely uncomfortable for the rest of the day

Mindfucker Has Closed the Chat - 9 chapter 17k words long very chaotic Monoshin chatfic (with one non-chatfic style chapter) where Monoma texts the wrong person and ends up befriending Shinso without knowing who he's talking to. the fic is tagged "attempt at humor" and i gotta say that the attempt was 100% successful, this thing is hysterical and i audibly laughed several times while reading it

Picture Perfect - i know i hardly ever talk about Kosen on this blog despite the fact that it's one of my favorite ships, but one day i'll post something about them i promise- anyway this tiny 2k word fic is pretty much what made me ship them. it's just... very good and very sweet yknow

Unlikely and Unusual - a oneshot collection made for one of those rarepair month events. it's not specifically a 1-B fic, but some of the oneshots feature 1-B characters and the ones i read are very cute :)

the one and only The Heart of a Hero - 345k words and recently updated after a long hiatus, basically a 1-B fandom legend. It has everything: drama, epic fights, romance, slice of life, character backstories, it's pretty much what BNHA would have been if it was about 1-B. A lot of things in it are inaccurate to canon because it was first written before the joint training arc even came out, but that just makes things more interesting in my opinion (dude i actually wish Reiko's quirk was like this in canon)! it's actually one of the main reasons why i got so invested in 1-B in the first place, i couldn't recommend it more!!

The author of THoaH has also written many other, shorter stories about 1-B, so their entire profile is worth checking out! my personal favorite out of these fics is I Want to Break Free, a 6k word oneshot focusing on Setsuna and her family.

and now for what is probably my personal favorite:

When Die Rolls Differ - 294k words and counting, canon divergence/butterfly effect fic where class 1-B is the class who gets attacked at the USJ instead of 1-A and becomes more involved in the main conflict of the series as a result. honestly i don't even have the words to describe it, it's so good, the character interactions and backstories, and the fights, and the humor, and the way 1-B students fit into the events that originally only featured 1-A characters, and the everything!! just!! dude!! it's amazing!! and there's so much love and thought and creativity put into it!! please check it out because this fic has my whole heart <3 it's also on a break right now, so you have time to catch up

aaand that's it for today! there are probably more fics that i like, i just can't remember them rn, so i'm planning on updating this post every time i remember a nice fic or find something new!

sorry this took so long i may have procrastination issues

[yolowritter]

Can I give you my rant about the absolute MESS Astruc and the rest of the staff did with the background of ML? Because it's infuriating to a history buff and cultural appreciator like me. Especially after the episode Darkblade shows they CAN do a good job (the story of the ancestor Darkblade is the last years of Bernard VII, Count of Armagnac and Conestable of France, just with names filed off), they just choose to be lazy. And infuriating.

Side material references the Fox, Bee, Turtle, Peacock, and Butterfly Miraculous as the Elemental Miraculous, drawing in the Wuxing... And they never explored that.

The Miraculous Order was based in Tibet... Except the Wuxing link above and everything else we see of the Order say they're Daoist-adiacent, and the Tibetan monasteries are Buddhist. And let's not go on the fact Tibet was a different and often rival civilization to China (even the CCP admits that, and bases their control on how China had CONQUERED Tibet before the British got involved) yet the Order is quite obviously Chinese...

Gabi Gassette changed name in Gabriel Agreste... Except this is impossible under French law. Changing one's personal name is already hard enough, and changing the family name requires a petition to the PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC proving you have a good reason under French law (and by what is shown, he didn't have one).

Joan of Arc never user her sword in combat, and in fact created her famous banner to have an excuse to not fight. So the scene of her getting time displaced and drawing a sword to fight is utterly ahistorical.

Lila Rossi is coded as an Italian, and I say that as an actual Italian. Her gestures, her expressivity, her hamminess, even her vindicativeness ("vendetta" is actually the generic Italian word for "revenge", but in English it became the word for "horrific revenge" because we're THAT vindicative), everything says she's an Italian teenaged girl. So all the "Cerise" nonsense is frankly ridiculous...

Now the really infuriating one, their take on Joan of Arc, of how she and the English bearer of the Black Cat were manipulated by the ambition of the Kings of France and England. Except Charles of France was the Dauphin, that is the heir to the throne, and grasping at straws to save France from the invasion when Joan showed up and requested he gave her an army to throw the English out of France and couldn't get crowned until Joan reconquered Reims, the city of the coronation. As for Henry VI of England, he was SIX (almost seven) when Joan entered the war (hence why Charles had a chance to reclaim the throne, to be crowned King of France one had to be a knight, and that meant one had to be an adult). These guys claimed Joan and Dark Grimalkin were manipulated by a desperate prince who was considering giving up and by a six years old child.

Sorry for the rant... But seriously, why did they do all of that?!

Because it's Thomas Astruc, and frankly I have no idea! Don't worry, rants are always welcome! By all means, I'm sure there's more stuff if we look for it! As a fellow history nerd, and also with Joan being my single favorite French historical figure ever, I have been seething ever since I saw their take on her. Henry the VI was literally just a child, and Charles was dependant on Joan because the English were demolishing France at the time! There is a perfectly good story in real history as to what could have happened to her and Dark Grimalkin! Just do an "partners on opposide sides of a war", slap in the iconic banner as her Miraculous weapon and call it a day! It would have been so much easier to follow real history! They didn't even need to do any work!

And as for the Cerise nonsense...that "explanation" better be really good. It better be Dark Souls-level deep lore with an interconnected backstory that ties up every single mystery in Lila's character better than Scooby Doo ever could, or I am going to lose my mind! I've already said this in my Lila post, but it's genuinely offensive that they had such a great idea for a character, and built her up so much...just to say "oh well actually she has three moms who don't even know eachother, and her name is Cerise, or Iris, or...something else". Lile c'mon! For Nooroo's sake here, it's a blatantly poor attempt to make her interesting again and it only worked because the fandom is grasping at straws for theory material because of the hiatus!

Any side material for the show just doesn't do a good enough job at actually giving us something new, or at the very least something interesting. The Miraculous and Kwami are constantly sidelined because why bother talking about this extremely high-potential universe you have in your show's Lore...if you didn't bother to fill in the blanks? Kwami are supposed to be Gods, Season 2 has references to Plagg blowing up Atlantis! Myths are apparently real in this universe! Please do something with that Thomas, it's free money! But nope, of course they ignore it.

The Guardian Order...well, I call them "The Jedi from Wish" for a reason. Like okay, religious order that has conservative thinking and backwards methods in a new world that is rapidly and constantly evolving. Cool concept! Unfortunately they don't even get their designs right, can't be consistent with which religion they're even based on, contradict themselves all the time, and make them utterly irrelevant after Su Han's first appearence. His only job in the story is to show up, yell at the protagonists, and then be proven wrong because "Ladybug is always right", only to apologize and then yeet himself to Brazil or something! I have an entire rant about this guy, but I'll refrain atm.

And lastly abt Gabriel's name change, I honestly didn't know that. Cool info, I'll add to my list of "times the writers didn't do their 5-minute google search". But like, c'mon. You're choosing to incorporate an important detail about your main villain into his backstory. Shouldn't you have somebody do the research to see if that's even possible? Even the intern is better than no one! I swear...and then us fanfic authors spend hours upon hours looking up obscure stuff just so one sentence/joke can be factually correct.

[1moreff-creator]

Firstly, good luck on the LGI video !! I think anyone who even tries to analyze tha embodiment of a stroke (/pos) that is that video deserves a medal, a hug, and a therapy session Secondly, considering you are a Veronika stan I was wondering if you had any theories in regards to her backstory, as I really feel like besides Hu and maybe David, she is the character who we know the least about in terms of her past. And I've been thinking about that a lot, especially since I think she will play a massive role in the conflicts of Chapter 3 (similar to the role Ace has played in Chapter 2) And considering what her secret is theorized to be by basically the entire community, her comment about how she used to be an outdoors person (implying something happened that made it so she wasn't one anymore), her lolita fashion sense implying that her family is at least somewhat wealthy because god those dresses are expensive, and whoever the fuck Alyssa Belyaeva is. I feel like she has some juicy stuff that's just waiting to be speculated by more people

Thanks for the well wishes! I probably will need therapy after that video, geez.

Anyways, no more David here, let’s talk Veronika! You are right in calling me a stan, even thinking about her is enough to get me to smile like a dummy. And you’re right, there is so much to speculate on with this freak! I agree she’ll probably have a bigger role soon, and there is clearly something that went deeply wrong in her childhood. Otherwise, how would she get this awesome? I love her.

I can't get anything conclusive for obvious reasons, but I have come up with what I think is an interesting theory about her backstory.

CW: Self-harm, speculation on child neglect and psychiatric wards

First, let me compile everything you brought up and a few more things.

+Veronika used to be an outdoors person, but isn’t anymore. She even likes skateboarding! Presumably because her talent requires her to be indoors a lot, but there’s a good chance there’s something more traumatic at play.

+She despises boredom over all else, and at times, not even horror is enough to satiate her thirst for thrills. “That's why I liked horror for such a long time. […] But in the end, fiction is only fiction”. Tsumugi kinnie spotted!

+Whenever she finds something exciting, she can’t help but get addicted. That’s an odd way for her to phrase that, but sure.

+She has a deep interest in psychology and horror, as we all know.

+Like you said, it’s possible her parents are quite wealthy, as she enjoys expensive lolita fashion, as well as “weird” and “exotic” foods, apparently.

+Her favorite color is white in the presence of other colors, as it makes them stand out, and her least favorite is white without other colors, since she considers it soulless. What a weirdo /affectionate.

+The hidden quote on her page is “Once something is broken, it can never be pieced together in quite the same way again. The same goes for people.” Spooky!

(I’m not bringing up Mai on this post, no shot I’m getting into that mess again)

+Her secret is most often speculated to be “You only took on your talent to distract from your incessant need to harm yourself for fun”. Now, watch that be Levi’s and she’s actually the murderer without remorse, I think that’d be funny. But yeah, the self-harm secret is most likely hers.

+Alyssa Belyaeva is/was her dearest friend, the person who gifted her the green triangle earring she wears.

This “dearest friend” is so odd. Like, on one hand, the fact the dev originally neglected to name her because they didn’t want to put too much emphasis on mostly unimportant characters (I wish I could find the actual wording they used, but I can’t see all the answers of the Q&A for some reason) would suggest she’s not too relevant. But on the other hand, her impact is literally etched into Veronika’s design via the earring, and…

Well, listen. She was Veronika’s friend. Not only did Veronika like her, which already implies something’s wrong with her, Alyssa actually liked Veronika back. Oh, there is something wrong wrong with this girl.

So, yeah, don’t know if she’s going to be relevant. I tried looking up the green triangle, see if it meant anything, but I didn’t see anything that looked related. I also looked up Alyssa’s name to see if it meant anything. “Alyssa” means “noble” or “truth”, which I don’t get anything from, and “Belyaeva” is just derived from “white (blond) hair”. Wikipedia, make up your mind, is it white or blond?

Although that does give me a headcanon idea, that Alyssa has white hair but dresses very colorfully, and that’s why Veronika’s favorite color is white in the presence of others.

Yo, watch me get attached to a character we have even less information on than goddamn Elliot Cuevas and Felicity Giles.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anyways, the problem with Veronika is clear. There’s a lot there, but we’re also missing a fuckton, which makes it really hard to theorize about her. It feels like we’re missing some kind of through-line which actually connects all the loose concepts surrounding this girl. The most sensible answer here is that it’s impossible to gather anything conclusive about her backstory within the bounds of sanity.

…

But you didn’t ask me to speculate so I would remain within the bounds of sanity, did you? You wanna see the craziness come in, yeah? Well, let’s go crazy.

The Inevitable Descent Into Insanity

Veronika likes skateboarding.

It’s something I mentioned off-handedly before, but let’s think about it for a second. While there is such a thing as an indoor skatepark, when most of us think of skateboarding, I imagine most of us jump to the idea of skateboarding outside. I feel, if Veronika truly only liked indoor skateboarding, that would be made more explicit, you know? Like how Levi’s profile states he likes “suckers (candy)”.

And if that’s the case, we can gather three things.

>Veronika isn’t bored of the outside.

>Veronika isn’t scared of the outside.

>More people need to draw Veronika skateboarding /lh

This is a bit of stretch, and I don’t have any more evidence she doesn’t have trauma from being outdoors, but that’s not all for boredom. She clearly enjoyed playing in the playground, which was indoors, but was still ultimately a playground. That makes her being bored of the outside even more unlikely.

But if she didn’t get bored of the outside, why did she pick up a talent that is explicitly only possible indoors? Well, I want to take a closer look at how that secret is worded.

“You only took on your talent to distract from your incessant need to harm yourself for fun”

What’s interesting here is that she only took on her talent to stop herself from harming herself. This could imply that, while she obviously enjoys horror a lot, she doesn’t enjoy it as much as what she was doing before. After all, if she did, she would have also picked it up simply because it was more fun, and the secret’s wording would be odd.

And there’s more. What I imagine most of us think when we read this is “Veronika got so bored of everything else, she started hurting herself to stave off her boredom”. But, at the risk of sounding morbid, how was she hurting herself? Because I feel most of us jump to the idea of cutting (that’s why everyone mentions her wrists being covered when talking about her secret), but that’s not the only way people self harm. And, sorry if this sounds insensitive, but cutting doesn’t really seem “fun” to me. Like, obviously all self-harm is bad for you, but that in particular doesn’t seem too entertaining.

Why am I talking about this? Well, I want to bring attention to something she tells Teruko in CH 2 EP 7:

Veronika: “The idea that I could screw up my life at any time, that I could make a fatal mistake that I can’t undo… That’s real fear. So it excites me.”

Veronika was seemingly talking about the killing game here, but what if she’s not? She seems to be talking as if she has more experience with this sort of thing than just the killing game. And in particular, the use of the word “excites me” is interesting when paired with the line I called out earlier: “Whenever I find something that’s exciting, I can’t help but get addicted”.

So, if she found a way to constantly put herself in dangerous situations where one mistake would cost her her life, she would get addicted to it. Is this fair to say?

And this is where I bring you back, and draw a link between her love for the outdoors, her secret, her talent, and this idea. I’ve connected the dots-

(I didn’t connect shit)

I’ve connected them. Here goes:

Whenever Veronika played outside, she would feel the need to injure herself and put herself in unnecessarily dangerous situations, so she could feel the fear of making a fatal mistake she can’t undo. She only took on being a Horror Fanatic to distract from this need, as indoors, there aren’t as many exciting ways for her to injure herself.

That insane enough? I feel it sorta makes sense. If you think about it, this would mean at some point, Veronika would have to decide between throwing herself at horror or continuing her path to becoming the Ultimate Skateboarder, and the only reason she chose horror was… well, she would need to really go out of her way to injure herself while watching a horror movie.

Meanwhile, whenever she was outside, it would be easier to harm herself. Stand on a swing (like we see her do in the series), fall from a height, ram into something on a skateboard. Most of the injuries wouldn’t be too severe, but they would add up, and depending on what she was doing, I imagine some of them could be a bit worse. And whenever that happened, she would feel more excited than before, get more addicted, and constantly look for ways to injure herself more, and worse, and worse. Perhaps even injuring herself before going out, so she could be in the maximum amount of pain possible.

But there may have been other reasons she was doing this. This is where the “wealthy parents” may come in. Stereotypically speaking, wealthy parents are often depicted as neglectful, more preoccupied with work than with their children. Think- Oh, well, think Mariabella, actually. That’s obviously not always the case, but it does happen.

And if this is the case, it’s possible she was also, subconsciously, harming herself as a call for help. As a way to get the attention she needed. There would have been better ways to go about it, but self-harming is sort of inherently irrational.

In fact, maybe I am really going completely insane, but I think there’s an exchange where something like this can be inferred? In CH 2 EP 2, when Veronika falls off the swing.

Veronika: “Ehehe! I’m fine! Don’t worry!”

Teruko: “I’m not worried about you. If your body was fragile enough to break from a light fall like that, then you wouldn’t have done something so stupid”

Veronika: “It’s fun to stand on swings, okay? It makes me feel tall. I didn’t know that these ones would be quite so slippery”

Veronika: “But really, I’m not hurt at all. The ground is very soft”

Now, let’s be clear. I am probably reading way too much into this, and this was probably just a quick way to transition to the point of the ground being soft. But it always struck me as odd that Veronika feels the need to tell Teruko she wasn’t hurt twice, even after Teruko had taken her at her word before.

So, hear me out, maybe that was force of habit. Like, she always (intentionally) injured herself while playing around, then Alyssa or someone else would be concerned about her, and fuss over her. Then, Veronika would have to repeatedly state she was fine, because the whole point was that she wanted to keep playing after hurting herself. And Alyssa would be concerned, but eventually brush it off with a laugh. Or, knowing the type of friends Veronika gets, maybe Alyssa would also have the habit of hurting herself alongside Veronika-

I am not going to get attached to a character we have only a name for. I am not going to get attached to a character we have only a name for. I am not going to get attached to a character we have only a name for-

Anyways, again, I’m probably reading too much into that line, it’s very likely Veronika just said she was okay again to get to the point about the floor being soft.

Anyways, that’s sort of the main idea of my speculation! That she harmed herself by playing outside to make it more exciting. All we’re missing is what made her decide to stop hurting herself, and an explanation for the quote on her page, the one about people breaking. I assume they’re likely related, but I can’t give a solid answer. So here’s a few possibilities:

>When her parents found out, they said she was “broken” and sent her to a (likely under 18) psychiatric ward. This could explain why she considers the color white on its own “soulless”. I mean, I doubt under 18 psychiatric wards look that depressing, and I couldn’t find conclusive images in Google, but I did see some white, so maybe! The reason I’m not too sure is that I really don’t know much about under 18 psychiatric wards, and while I did try to do some research, I don’t exactly feel like being in more lists than I’m already probably on, you feel?

>A bit more worrying, perhaps her parents were the ones who tried to “””fix””” her, and they did something bad to her. I can’t comment much more on this idea, as any further ideas tend more towards fanfic than actual speculation.

>Maybe the one who “””broke””” was actually Alyssa, and either she was sent to a psych ward or something happened to her that made her “soulless”. I don’t like tying Alyssa too closely to Veronika’s backstory, because of the whole “she might not be important” thing, but it’s there. However, it’s important to note, if something did happen to Alyssa, Veronika likely wouldn’t be at fault, otherwise it would likely be mentioned in her secret.

>There's also a possibility Veronika stopped self harming on her own or, more likely, with proper therapy (so proud of her if that's the case!), and the "broken" thing refers to something she'll do in the killing game. I don't know if what I'm about to say really makes sense, but while I've always imagined Veronika saying her line with her "shadow over eyes" sprite, I guess it's possible she would actually say it with one of her "Junko-ish" or "deranged smile" sprites. I'm imagining something like: she drives Arturo absolutely insane, laughs about how horrible he's gotten, and with a malicious, wide smirk, she tells everyone: "Arturo is broken, and nothing will put him back together again. How entertaining!" Something like that. I really just want her to do something extremely fucked up, I think she deserves to have some fun :D

And there's my whole theory about Veronika's backstory! Even though it's probably completely wrong, I hope it satisfied your craving for speculation on the resident freak. And thanks for reading! If you made it this far, you deserve a good friend that loves you just like you are, like Alyssa! Take care!

[stingrayloveblog]

Alright because I'm curious: What is wrong with Marina's quest to help sanitized octolings? Because as far as what little we knew about it it was blended up people, removed memories to make mem cakes, and then if you botch it, then you become part of them. It was both vague enough to get the general idea across and open enough for more information to be revealed.

So what didn't you like about the idea?

The problem was that in octo expansion, we were told that the sanitized octolings had no vital signs, and in typical splatoon lore fashion, we were told in a dev interview that sanitized octolings are formed out of sanitization ink. Its hard to take dev interview information seriously, but judging by the fact that they rarely ever put actual important worldbuilding details in the game we have to take what we can get. Basically meaning, none of the sanitized octolings are any one person in particular. They cant get their memories back because they arent any original person. Theyre basically walking frankensteins monster corpses with no purpose but to do whatever kamabo tells them to do. Letting the color chip memories "sort themselves out" inherently has way too many risks and issues. It straight up just would not work. Anyone can have any color chips in their pallet. And if any color chip is made of any mem cakes, all marina essentially did was destroy the memories and basically do exactly what kamabo co did. The only one it would probably work on is acht since they are visibly not fully sanitized and the devs, for some godforsaken reason, decided not to give acht any reasonable or sensible plot relevance at all regarding literally anything that was going on. This basically means either only some sanitized octolings are made from the ink while others are just regular octolings that got sanitized, or they just retconned that first fact. They also tried to say that agent 8 is sanitized when they are clearly obviously visibly not sanitized in any way, shape, or form, unless theyre only now trying to make sense of how sanitization works by making it a multi-stage process. This still makes acht a complete outlier in the sanitization process since they remember everything pre-kamabo (while conveniently acting like they didnt canonically willingly get sanitized in the first place), while eight remembers nothing. Either way, the character creation part of octo expansion doesnt line up with agent eights canon backstory. Thats a whole other thing though.

Another issue is fuzzified octolings. No mention of them or anything that happened in alterna. From what we can gather from alterna, there is no more octarian army or at least a huge chunk of them are gone frok their society because of alterna. And yet, this plot point isnt brought up ever again, even within alterna since they for some reason forgot octavio existed right after forcing him into the story. Also, they had a hint that dedf1sh got fuzzified too, with one alterna track being named #35 captured, yet here they are, perfectly fine and still sanitized. Also doesnt help that fuzzification is functionally the same as sanitization, it just happens on contact instead, but nothing about memories is focused on. Marina absolutely should have been aware that a huge chunk of octarian society went missing to the point where even octavio went to look for them, unless side order happens before alterna, in which case it still ends up making marinas efforts useless.

The problem too with what marina did is that they showed no proof of any of it actually working. Agent 8 was supposed to be the first one to test it out, meaning we never actually know if the color chip-mem cake thing actually works, nor will we know if it will ever work, because for some reason we still let smollusk take control over the order sector. Marina should not have to hack her own creation to make things work. And sure, they have this one-off line thats like "wow eight you got your memories back !!", but thats something that couldve been shown so that its actually impactful and so that eight has an actual motive in the story that isnt just Stand There And Do Things Because You Were Told To, as well as Stand There And Listen To These People Talk To Each Other simulator. They even had mentions of other octoling devs that helped her make the memverse and yet we dont get any focus on them either. Smollusk talks about them, yet somehow they arent made important to the plot. This also implies that octolings can just go back and forth freely between their society and the surface, unless these devs also happened to leave and just so happened to not be involved with the fuzzification issue. We also have the case of people supposedly being dragged into the memverse and they look spaced out in the real world, yet thats also not made into an actual plot point and instead just mentioned once and never focused on again. If they had just shown any actual impact to the characters or the real world at all, maybe it wouldve been more interesting. They really went with a tell-not-show route with side order and it sucked.

And, to add on, it wasnt only octolings that kamabo co did stuff to. Iso padre is the biggest example of that. He lost his memories too. Yet they decided to leave him out of the story when he arguably wouldve been more relevant to what was actually happening than acht was, but unfortunately they opted to focus more on adding a popular character to the story for the sake of adding new useless information about a character and nothing else. All they had to do was make acht actually involved with the actual plot and not just sit in the elevator doing literally nothing and adding literally nothing but dialogue for them and marina to act like they just saw each other last week.