#just that yknow part of her breaking free of that would also be realizing that she just wants closeness with someone and it doesnt-

[girlmetalsonic]

something that is like the baseline of amys entire character to me is that shes lonely. shes clingy and physically affectionate in a way none of her friends really are, shes always getting pushed aside and left behind. yeah, she helps out people she doesnt know because shes a nice person, but also, she sees part of herself in them. she wont leave someone else behind because she knows the feeling —and more importantly, hates the feeling. if she doesnt have somebody to stand by her and be there for her, then shes going to be that person for everybody else. something something her obsession with sonic is really just like a manifestation of that desire for closeness with someone, and she thinks that romance is the only way to get that. idk... this hedgehog can have so many abandonment issues.

[huntingrays]

Jason revival fic ideas poll (starring valgrace)

i have several revival ideas but don’t know which to work on after my current long wip. i saw someone else doing it with their wips so i decided to do it for all the revival fic ideas i have, to see if there’s one ppl rlly like. so… i suppose vote for which one you all like best! no promises but wanna hear people’s thoughts

oh also if you wanna snatch any of these ideas, go ahead! well, you can take any except for the first, that one is my baby, i’m attached to it. but all others are free game. i just ask to be credited for such a cool idea 😌 cause i’m so cool and awesome /j

(some of them might be kinda nonsense… but it’s about the vibe yknow)

1. Flames of Fate.

one of two that’s currently a wip (but hasn’t been touched for so long). basically, leo is staying with piper cause his mental health tanked after jason’s death. he’s having a good time until they run into rachel who gives them a prophecy. leo, piper, and thalia are part of the prophecy so they all go together. during it, leo gets a power where he basically becomes a jack of all trades. basically, if he knows the name and godly parent of any living demigod, he can borrow their power. there are drawbacks since using the powers of someone else drains him (think shadow travel level draining) and the powers don’t always listen to him (since he isn’t a kid of that god). also, he can’t use his powers during until he swaps back to his own. during the end of the quest, he panics and summons the power of jason, the last person who made him feel safe and loved. to his surprise, the powers come, are as easy to use as his own, and his own powers stay. while recovering at chb, he summons the powers again and they come. as he watches the sparks and lighting dance up and down his arm, he realizes this means jason is alive (since he can only summon the powers of living demigods). on the quest, they went to get a dangerous box left by the fates, one that would kill the person who opens it. leo opens it and finds a string aside, one that attaches to his pinky finger the moment he touches it. he realizes he has to follow this string and he sets off on his own, not wanting to put his friends in any danger. basically, in this au it’s a thing where like jason was never supposed to die and the fates intended for leo to use the cure. originally, jason and leo’s lives got connected after his death, and they were supposed to die at the same time. however, their fates were messed up due to apollo and the whole mess he made, so jason died when he wasn’t supposed to. their solution was the string and sending three people who would be desperate to get him on a quest (his ex and best friend, his sister, and his best friend who loves him). however, the string doesn’t lead him to jason but instead to increasingly dangerous situations. eventually, he winds up in tartarus and dies. suddenly, jason is revived bc like this wasn’t their fate. and he panics bc dead leo and becomes a human defibrillator. and yay! leo is revived! emotional reunion! but… they’re still in tartarus and now have to escape together. not much plans for that, but after they escape leo is slowly dying (he can’t catch a break) so he uses his last remaining strength to shadow travel them somewhere… which isn’t the best idea since he’s shit at it. last time he did it was on the quest where, in a dangerous situation, he shadow traveled them out of it. he meant to go back to piper’s new cali home (apollo helped them out a bit) but instead brought them to percy’s closet at his college dorm (coming out jokes ensue). so, he only things that he needs to get them somewhere safe… which winds up being sally jackson’s apartment. poor sally, she just wants to celebrate the holidays with her family and her son’s gf when suddenly a boy who’s supposed to be dead comes stumbling out of her bedroom with a boy who looks like he’s dying. and basically after that jason iris messages will cause he’s the only doctor he knows. yeah, this one is like… the most thought out. i think it’s the only one that’s been seriously plotted out. so, that’s why it’s so in depth. I took rick’s habit of tossing couples into tartarus and applied it to valgrace (this may become a theme).

2. Red string of fate (that kills you)

basically, in this one the fates go to the seven (plus nico and reyna) and tell them there’s been a situation. jason’s soul never went to the underworld. his soul is missing and they have no idea where it is or how to get it back. they made a way to track him but they need a demigod to take on the job. basically, it’s a red string that will lead the demigod to his soul, attaching the two. however, there’s a draw back. it’s incredibly dangerous to attach two souls. if they die while on the quest, both of their souls will be destroyed. basically, permanent death, no after life or second chance at life. despite loving jason, everyone is hesitant, not willing to take on the risk of destroying not only their own soul but jason’s as well. no one… except leo. he volunteers for the job. in his eyes, an afterlife isn’t worth it if he has to spend eternity without jason. he’d rather cease to exist than to never see him again. he won’t abandon jason, to leave his soul to wander wherever it is lost and alone

3. Werewolf Jason

jason comes back but like… comes back wrong. he’s a werewolf now awoooo. he hides it from leo bc he doesn’t want him to think he’s a monster. however, leo finds out and doesn’t care bc he adores jason. wolf shenanigans ensue.

4. Nyx fucks around

basically, in this one if nyx takes a life due to a broken promise in the styx, she gets their soul. so, she gets jason’s soul. she remembers the prophecy about one of zues’s sons overthrowing him so she decides to revive jason and train him. she wants to have fun, to fuck around and find out. also, everyone hates zues anyway. it’s a win-win. she won’t allow jason to visit his friends until she decides that he’s done. however, she does allow him to have dreams about them. meanwhile, leo is going on a quest with his friends on a rebuilt ship. it’s not as cool as the argo II but still p cool. while he’s talking to percy on the deck, percy gets possessed by eidolons. they force him to fight leo. leo is fucked since he isn’t a great fighter, they’re right next to the ocean, and he doesn’t want to hurt percy. percy tries to fight them off but there’s two of them and every time he fights one off, another takes its place. eventually, the fight results in percy being forced to kill leo. oh also he gets like stabbed through the back like jason :) possessed percy pushes leo into the water to drown him, ensuring he dies. while underwater, with hands around his throats, leo mouths “i’m sorry” to percy since he knows his friend will blame himself. before leo dies, his last thought is that he will get to see jason again. also, percy is suddenly knocked out somehow. when poor percy wakes up, he ofc asks “where’s leo?” bc that’s the classic heartbreaking question. poor percy get escape guilt. nyx is watching and she kinda needed an alive leo for her plans (since jason went on long, love sick rants to her) so she uses her powers to just pluck his body to her place (which is why his friends couldn’t find his body). jason wakes up from having a dream about that and rushes to nyx and finds leo’s dead body lying there’s. he’s ofc devastated and breaks down into tears, holding leo’s dead body and sobbing his heart out. jason’s grief results in his powers going wild and nyx thinks he’s strong enough. she says that she can’t revive leo, but that there’s somewhere jason can go and ask for a favor from the gods. perhaps, one of them will make a deal with him and bring him back. she places a spell on leo so his soul will stay in his body and his body won’t decompose. so, jason sets off on a journey while carrying dead leo’s body and he’s very emotional. when he appears at the place, eros shows up cause he wants to have some fun. he says he’ll revive leo is jason makes a deal with him. i have like… two thoughts for the deal. one is that he admired achilles and how crazy he went after the death of his lover. the deal would be that if leo gets hurt, he’ll be filled with the ‘rage of achilles’. the other idea is that he wants to punish jason for how his father is, not wanting him to follow in his steps. that deal is that jason has to be loyal to leo, even if they aren’t dating. if he dates or is romantically with anyone who isn’t leo, he’ll slowly die. jason doesn’t care and would be willing to agree to anything to get leo back. (if achilles curse he sees at as a better way ti protect leo. if loyalty curse, he would rather remain single than live in a world without leo. also, if he and lie ever dated, he’d NEVER cheat on him). whoo leo is revived and they’re happy! but also they have to track down their friends and finish the quest (there was a line in the prophecy about seven demigods and reuniting the seven. he now realizes it means the og seven). shenanigans and gayness ensue

5. Valhalla

i died and ended up in the afterlife of an entirely different pantheon?! yeah jason in valhalla. basically, his soul is kinda just… around after his death, no afterlife. sam finds it and brings jason back. confusion comes when he says that he’s the son of jupiter. now, they have to find out how a roman ended up in the nordic afterlife. also jason befriends the gang and copes with his death. they go on a quest and at the end of it, magnus asks his reward to be jason getting revived, getting a second chance at life. magnus also decides to help his pining ass by calling annabeth and asking where her friend leo lives. he tells jason and jason goes there the moment he gets his life back and has an emotional reunion with leo

6. Monster Jason

basically, hera decides to sneak around. she takes jason’s soul and makes a new body for him. however, around fall time, jason’s soul gets restless and she’s worried about the gods finding out. she goes to echidna, wanting help to make a new body and hide him. she can’t make exactly make humans so she makes him a human body with monstrous qualities (my idea is just like… very tall and crazy strength with wings, claws, and a like feathered mask around his eyes). hera asks where they can keep him while she works on finishing his human form (so he can switch between the two forms). echidna’s solution is to just… throw him into tartarus. so they do. and he’s down there… for MONTHS. so he’s very changed by his time there. he’s more ruthless. one day, leo falls in while on a quest. when jason hears about a human, he investigates and is shocked to see leo. he hides from him but secretly watches and takes care of him (by giving him food and protecting him). he doesn’t want leo to see him and think of him as a monster. even if leo sees him and doesn’t think so, he’s been with his thoughts. he knows he’s lost some of his humanity. it’s easier for him to hurt, to kill. eventually, leo sees him when jason protects him from a sudden monster attack. he is just happy to see his best friend again. by now, the time hera needed to make jason a new body is up so they escape tartarus together. jason gets a new body and leo gets a tall, strong bird bf.

7. Psyche and Eros

current has a short wip. same as last one, but they decide to rebuild the eros’s palace. basically, nobody can see his face or say jason’s name. if they do, he won’t be hidden and the gods will know what hera did. also, he wears like a skull to hide his face. however, he has like a mirror that shows him his friends. he sees leo in danger and goes to save him. he… goes a bit crazy and takes leo back to his palace (while he’s unconscious) to heal him. however, he decides that leo will be safer there and decides to keep him there. when leo wakes up, he’s ofc very angry about being kidnapped by some weird bird man. he’s even angrier when the guy won’t let him leave and instead gives him a mirror so he can still see his friends. jason hates leo being upset with him (and that he can tell him the truth) so he says that leo can ask for whatever he wants and he’ll make it for him. he also makes a whole room in the palace where leo can invent it his heart’s content. eventually, leo warms up to this nice bird man who gets him what he wants and is more than happy to hear him ramble about his inventions. eventually, against his better judgement, he confesses his feelings and he and jason get together. despite jason’s warnings, he’s curious about the bird man. so, when jason is sleep, he lights a flame in his hand to see and takes off the skull mask. he’s shocked when he sees jason. his flames accidentally go out of control due to his emotions and he accidentally burns jason. jason wakes up and is upset that leo didn’t listen to his warning bc now his life is in danger. so, the palace crumbles and leo is left with his regret while jason flies off to go hide. what happens after this? idk haven’t planned that far

[fangbangerghoul]

soft leather and spurs

MDNI, 18 + Tw: praise kink, soft breeding kink, language? WC: 3,787 This one-shot is dedicated to the wonderful @thatsgoodsquishy0 for always being there when I am crying (like pictured above) while I am writing my fics. She deserved this and I am excited to share it! fem!reader x softdom!Sam (Not pirate Sam Coe, I promise) As usual with all my other explicit works I will post a chunk but end it before it picks up too much. Feel free to skip to my Ao3 Link. Also! Please go check out her current wonderful Coemancer fic; There is a Light (That Never Goes Out). It is absolutely a piece of art! Ao3 Link Tumblr Link Enjoy! : >

soft leather and spurs

The air was heavy with dry heat as the stars sparkled the sky above. The noise from the bar was getting further and further away while you both stumbled back to the StoneRoot inn. You felt the light touch of calloused hands run up your curves and small giggle escapes from your lips. Without thinking your feet get tied up between each other and suddenly there’s a stone wall behind you and a tall and handsome cowboy in front. Your thoughts swirl of excitement and happiness as you watch his baby blue eyes stare shamelessly at your lips. 

“I didn’t realize strangers were so comfortable like this.” 

“No, but they can be sometimes” His soft rugged voice seemed to move along with his finger as it traced your delicate face. You two were supposed to be playing a game but it seemed the drinks and the night had gotten the best of the both of you. The heart within your chest cavity seems to seize with anticipation as Sam slowly starts to lean towards you, going in for your lips. He smelt of bourbon, leather, and an earthy musk that made the butterflies in your stomach flutter with excitement. There was a part of you that was so desperately ready to feel his skin against yours but you knew if you dragged it out it would be even sweeter in the end. His lips were only inches from yours but you manage to side step out the way with a bit of clumsiness, giggling as his playful dismay appeared on his face. 

“Where are you going, maam?” He asked with a twang as you used the moment to take a few steps ahead. Your eyes would sneak a few peeks behind you to make sure he was following and to your delight he was. His eyes were only on you as he lazily followed behind, hands in pocket and a casualness in his stride that really made him fit so well within the scene around him. 

“Wherever this lady pleases.” You responded with confidence as you turned the corner to the last stretch of path that led to your room for the night. You picked up your pace and giggled as you made it half way up before he turned the corner. 

“Hey!” He called out to you and you saw his big grin as he caught up to you in a matter of minutes. The large steps he took to catch up had increased his pace and Sam sort of slammed into you but his arms held tightly as you both swayed for a moment. “You better wait for me. I have the room key, yknow.” 

“I am sure they would have given me a spare.”

“Perhaps but I could just as well tell them you were breaking and entering my room.” His hands slid up and down your body with eagerness and they stopped as they cupped your head. His hot breath filled your nostrils and he quickly stole the kiss you owed him from earlier. You thought about pulling away to mess with him but his lips tasted divine. There was a flicker of passion that ignited within you and you were soon pressing yourself against him with the same eagerness he displayed moments before. The rhythm of your breathing started to fall in sync with his the longer your tongues danced in eachother’s mouth. You found your hands groping the back of his full jeans and he let out a small chuckle as you squeezed. 

“You ready to go to the room now?” Sam teased as if he had been waiting for you this whole time and it wasn’t the other way around. His closeness was enough to make you feel on fire and a part of you wanted to let him take you here on the sidewalk but you knew it would all come in due time. You rolled your eyes and gripped his hand as his fingers found their way next to yours and you both with a questionable balance walked into the Stoneroot Inn. 

The dim hallway to your room for the night was narrow so you continued the lead to the room. You stopped at the door and held out your hand patiently waiting for him to hand you his keycard. Instead of handing you the card Sam’s hand had wrapped around your wrist and pushed you gently against the door. He was softly groaning as his mouth decorated your neck with kisses and light nips. He let go of your wrist but only to grab handfuls of your breasts and rub the groin of your pants. Sam was acting like a needy young man instead of his actual age but something about the vigor in his hunger towards you encouraged you to lean back into him.

[goorehound]

I finally posted a fic

It’s my first time writing x reader, but yknow there’s never enough Mary content so I’m trying to do my part.

You get invited to your ex’s engagement party and drag Mary along. Mary being petty and bathroom sex ensues.

Rating: Explicit

—————

“Can I at least take off the tie?” Mary complained, two fingers under his collar to loosen it up as much as he could. Head rested sulkily on the window of the car.

“Come on, Mare.” You laughed where you were tapping your fingers on the steering wheel, watching the red light ahead of you. “You look great, don’t fiddle with it.”

There was a childish face pulled in your direction before he dropped his hands to dig out his cigarettes and crack the window open.

“What’s the dudes name again? Eddie?” He asked petulantly and shoved a cigarette between his lips.

“Mature. It’s Ethan.” You corrected.

“Whatever, same diff.” He shot back and took the first drag off his cigarette, halfheartedly blowing it out the window. “You never told me the breakup story.”

You raised an eyebrow and sent a smile in his direction, unable to tell if you could sense some actual jealousy or if your boyfriend was simply being bitchy because of his outfit. “You never asked. He cheated on me, with her.”

There was a low whistle from Mary. “And now they’re getting married? How long ago was that?”

“Uhh,” You had to scrunch your face in thought. “Four years ago, I think. Year before I met you, it must’ve been.”

He turned to watch you when the car started moving again, tongue poked into his cheek. “What kind of asshole throws a fucking engagement party?”

“Be nice, it’ll be a good chance to see old friends.” Okay, you’d admit it. You were also just a little curious how the two of them were doing and you sorta hoped it wasn’t all perfect, and you felt a little suspicious about their intentions. But you tried to focus on the positives, like chatting with his parents again, catching up with all of the mutual friends you’d had with Ethan years ago.

“We won’t even stay that long. Stop scowling at me.”

Mary heaved a sigh before reaching over to slide his palm up your thigh. “Fine. Only because you look hot.” His fingers skimmed higher, and your hand held his wrist to stop it from shifting higher.

“And I’m not wearing panties.” You flashed him a smile and he groaned as he spread his own thighs. “For after. You’re not showing up with a boner.”

“Fuck baby, give me ten minutes in the back seat and there won’t be any boner to worry about.” Mary assured, gliding his fingers over the soft skin.

“Nuh uh.” You picked up his hand to drop it into his own lap. A bit late to realize it was a mistake when he palmed himself lewdly. “Ever heard of delayed gratification?”

Mary held up his hands, palms raised in defeat. “Right sure. Yes ma’am.” He tossed his cigarette butt out the window, his hair pushed back in contrast to his normal devils lock hanging in his face.

“Okay.” You turned into the street, seeing all the cars lined up that were likely mostly the other guests. Mary was kind enough to keep his mouth shut about the big fancy houses when he saw your face, the anxiety of it all catching up with you as you stole a parking space for your tiny and constantly breaking down car.

Oh fuck, this was going to suck wasn’t it? No. No. It would be fine. You could do this. You had Mary, so you weren’t completely surrounded by rich assholes. He leaned over to plant a smacking kiss to your cheek and grinned. “Let’s go get some free food.” He slipped out of the car and waited for you to join him and lead him to the house.

There was a clear path out to the backyard which was fucking massive, and Mary muttered as such to you as his eyes searched for the food and alcohol. You were a bit on the late side, but you only got a few looks. Most likely for the ratty combat boots on your boyfriends feet, and the homemade cross earring dangling from his left lobe.

“Oh fuck, bacon.” Mary flashed you a smile. “You want me to go grab us a plate and some drinks?” He nudged you softly, and you forced up a pleasant smile.

“Yeah,” You squeezed his shoulder. “I’ll go say hi to some people. Come find me?”

With an affirmative he was off to scrounge some food for you two, and you bit the bullet and searched for the few familiar faces. Unless most of them got plastic surgery it didn’t appear that half of your old group was here, which okay. Fair enough. It’s not like you talked to them right? The ones that did make it looked so wildly different now, and it took you a second to spot two of them chatting.

Their primped up hair had you a bit self conscious of your fading dye, but you were too excited to catch up and say your hellos to let it get to you. You found out soon after giving brief hugs that one had become a hairdresser, and the other had proudly announced he’d gotten into law school since you last spoke. Which was a bit hard to wrap your head around.

Mary came over with a bite of food shoved in his cheek around that point, handing you a wine glass that had been perched precariously between his fingers. “They didn’t have any beer.” He informed you in a way that it was clear he had opinions on that.

“Thanks.” You wrapped your free hand around his arm, eyeing the stacked up plate balanced on his hand and knowing he was probably dying to dig into it - he’d given some long winded explanation about why he wouldn’t eat his own food that he spent money on if he was going to some ‘pretentious ass party where they’re just going to be handing it out.’

“This Kendall,” You said to pointedly bring his attention to the couple in front of you. “And this is Greyson.”

“Oh yeah,” Mary fumbled to hold the plate and glass in one hand, and the clanking together us Kendall cringing. “Mary. The boyfriend. Nice to meet ya.” He stuck his hand out, which Greyson shook without hesitation, Kendall a bit less enthusiastically.

“Mary.” Greyson repeated and raised a brow. “That’s kind of a-“

“Yeah, I didn’t pick it though, did I?” Mary bared his teeth in what he must have thought was some kind of smile. Privately you found it endearing that he at least gave an effort, even if it didn’t exactly work out how he’d hoped.

“No, no. I guess not.” Greyson laughed softly and put his hand back to Kendall’s waist. “So, the boyfriend? How did you two meet?” He looked back at you for an explanation.

“Oh!” You said, a bit of heat rising to your face as you recalled the memory and realized you couldn’t relay it exactly how it went. “I saw Mary’s band play and we bumped into each other. I kept coming to his shows, and you know, the rest is history and all that.” There. A few details were missing, like how you’d been loudly complaining to your friends that your vibrator had broken and Mary had drunkenly leaned over your table while passing by to inform you his tongue could get the job done. And when you’re that many drinks in, it’s sorta charming in it’s own way.

“Yup.” Mary agreed. “Wooed her with my angelic voice.”

“A band?” Kendall asked curiously. “What’s the name?”

“Repugnant.” Mary answered back easily and popped a small hors d’oeuvre into his mouth in the midst of their conversation. Any awkwardness from that was overshadowed entirely by your name being called, and you trailed it back to find Ethan waving you over to a small group. And god, his fiancé looked gorgeous. Layla was much prettier than you ever remembered her being and it was a shocking punch to the gut.

“We better go say congrats, it was good bumping into you guys.” You offered up as you started to tug Mary away.

“Sick to meet you guys.” Mary added in around his mouthful and at least tried to swallow it all before you two made it over.

“You came!” Layla smiled brightly at you. She’d always been sweet and kind, and you supposed it wasn’t really her fault that Ethan wasn’t loyal. She was nice enough and it was a long time ago now, and some genuine friendliness was welcomed. Kendall hadn’t really seemed all that pleased to talk to you.

“This is Y/N,” Ethan introduced loudly to the rest of the group. “Back from my rebellious phase.” He laughed, which the other joined in on. Sort of felt like you were missing some kind of joke there, and you could feel Mary bristle up beside you. “And this is?”

“Mary,” your boyfriend didn’t seem to keep up the same politeness as earlier with his flat response. “Eddie, right?”

“Ethan.” He tried to laugh it off.

“Ohh, right.” Mary replied noncommittally with the same baring of teeth. You squeezed tightly where you were holding on to his arm.

“Congratulations!” You burst out to move on from that, grinning now at Layla. “I’m so happy for you guys!”

“Finally settled down with a nice girl, didn’t he?” One of his clearly newer friends piped in. Which again. Yeah, ouch, just a little bit. For a moment you started stressing about the length of your dress, discreetly tugging down the hem.

“Finally reigned him in.” Someone else said which drew some laughter from the rest. Mary clearly couldn’t find the humour in it as he remained impassive and studying the faces of the men around him. From what you remembered, you hadn’t been super close to Layla of course, but she’d hung around similar bars and done the same things you’d done around that time - but whatever, right? Every relationship was different. They clearly changed together and that was more than okay.

“Let me guess, it’s all golf and fantasy football leagues now, huh?” Mary said to Ethan with that same wonky smile that conveyed no joy. “Livin’ the dream, man.”

Ethan’s eyes narrowed around his chuckle this time, clearly trying to play along and not make things too weird at his own party. At least Mary was going the subtle route on this one and you were thankful for that, nothing here really called for making a scene.

“So, Mary.” Layla was either oblivious to the slight tension or just as desperate to move on from it as you were. “What do you do?”

“I work at a cemetery.” Mary was a bit kinder to her than he was Ethan and actually entertained her in conversation. “Groundskeeping, grave digging, you know. Whatever they need.”

“Creepy job.” Ethan nodded along.

“Ah, maybe for pussies, yeah.” Ah, Mary did not sound too pleased. You didn’t think he was going to play nice for much longer. “Not that this conversation is boring the shit out of me or anything,” Great start, Mare. “But I gotta take a leak. Where’s your bathroom at?”

There was a stutter before Layla gave out the directions. “Just in that door, at the end of the hall to the left.”

“Thanks.” He grinned and nodded his head. “C’mon baby.” He prompted and ignored a few strange looks and used your grip on his arm to pull you along towards the house.

“That was a dick move.” You pointed out. “They’re going to think we’re fucking.”

“Was kinda hoping we could.” He replied and dropped his plate and drink on a table as you walked, not before finishing off both of your wine. Your hand tightened on his arm. A fuck would be nice, after that, but you didn’t really want to leave that impression. “Or at least let me eat you out? I need a palate cleanser.”

“You’re so fucking gross.” You laughed as he lead you inside, and didn’t complain when he pulled you to the bathroom, kicking the door shut so he could lean against it and pull you up against him.

“Forget about them.” He breathed out as he smeared a couple kisses over your neck and slid his hands around to slip under your dress and get two handfuls of your ass. “Who gives a fuck what they think?”

There was no solid argument against that one, and you sighed into him as you came to push your fingers through his hair. What did it matter if they thought you fucked? Or knew you fucked? It was stupid to come here and think everything would be the same. It was clear now that this wasn’t an attempt to rekindle anything, and the friends you hadn’t been able to find probably hadn’t been invited because they were still like you. Most of you hadn’t come from well-off family’s like Ethan’s, and most of you were just fine with that.

And fuck, you just wanted Mary right now.

“Mare.” You whispered out when his fingers brushed against your panties, and his soft groan showed that he took that as permission. Teasing as he leaned up to connect your lips in a deep kiss, waiting until he had your lower lip between his teeth to bite down gently and start pressing a bit more firmly where his fingers had been just barely running over your clit.

When he backed you up against the counter you hopped up with his help so he could grind up against you, your fingers tugging his hair down. It was never hard to make him oblige and he was was easily crouching to get on his knees, kissing over your thighs before helping you out of your panties.

Lazily they were half shoved into his back pocket as he looked up at you with a crooked smile.

“Come on baby,” Your grip tightened on his hair and you could see his eyes soften at that. “I need you.”

That was more than enough for him to dive in, skipping on the foreplay to get his tongue between your folds with a moan. His tongue flicking up slowly to run over your clit, focusing his attentions there when you angled your hips to press into his face.

It wasn’t long before you were grinding into his face, grabbing at his hair tightly and guiding his head along as he worked you with his tongue. “Oh fuck, Mary.” You tried to keep it down a little, everyone was likely outside but the idea of this being interrupted before you’d finished was very unappealing.

He pulled his lips off after sucking at your clit, instead worming his arm up so he could slide a finger into you. Teeth digging into your thigh when you moaned out, sucking at the skin until it turned purple beneath his mouth. “You look so fucking pretty.” He blinked up at you as he got his second finger in, resting his cheek on your leg to watch your face as his digits curled inside you.

You could only blush and bite your lip on a louder moan at that one, rocking slightly with his pace. “Make me cum and you can fuck me.” You told him.

That spurred him on, he had to move his arm down and out of the way so he could get full access to your pussy again. Slurping in a frankly disgusting manner when he got back to work, but it was still hot. His enjoyment and dedication to the task already had you closer to the edge, feeling his tongue lap at the wetness between your thighs.

Your head fell back as you got your legs around him to hold on, gripping his hair as tightly as you could without ripping it out - which always worked for him, anyway, so you didn’t feel too badly about that. Little moans and whines of pleasure bubbled out of your throat as he doubled down on you.

“Right there, don’t stop Mare I’m so close.” You whispered. As if he could stop with the hold you had on him, his hands groping and kneading at the outside of your thighs. “Right there.” You instructed and warned simultaneously, and he obeyed by keeping up whatever the fuck kind of magic his tongue was doing.

The coil tightened and your body tensed up with it, holding still and breath stopping as you felt yourself push right up to the edge. And you fell over it with an embarrassingly loud moan of his name, twitching and shaking as he kept his mouth glued to you. He only pulled off when you were breathing once again and finally loosening up your thighs.

Mary didn’t even pretend to wipe his mouth as he stood to pull you into a kiss, hand coming between your legs. Circling your sensitive clit to draw out a few more noises and plunging his fingers back into your slick cunt. “Fuck, you’re wet.”

You were already pulling at his belt to pull his cock free and biting your lip with a smile. “Shut up and fuck me already, Goore.”

You weren’t sure you’d ever seen Mary move so fast in his life, shoving his pants and boxers down far enough to give him a bit more range. Then he was helping you sit yourself closer to the edge of the counter, leaning you back a bit until he was able to rub the head of his cock up against you with a soft groan. “Say my name again.”

“Mary.” You moaned out.

“Fuck baby, yeah, that’s it.” Mary pushed himself in just to let the head of his cock sit inside you. “You want it? Tell me how bad you need my cock.”

“Please, Mary.” You knew begging was the quickest way to get him inside you, he fucking sucked at impulse control. “Please fuck me. I need your cock, Mare, please.”

As predicted he bottomed out quickly, grinding deep before he pulled out and fucked himself in again. Once he was balls deep again Mary pulled you up to press your chests together, holding you close and tight as he started to work his hips. There was a soft moan when you latched on to his neck, his head rolling to the side to give you more access to lick and bite at the column of his throat.

“Better not take to long.” You whispered playfully. “Don’t wanna get caught.”

He huffed out a laugh and held at your hips, as he started to properly fuck into you. When you moaned, he groaned. When you pulled at his hair, his hips stuttered. And when you dug your nails into his back, he practically whined for you.

“Fuck you’re so tight. Love fucking this pussy, baby.” He purred out and turned his head to catch your lips in a bruising kiss. “Shit you’re gonna make me cum.”

You clamped down on him at that, delighting in the way his rhythm went a little wonky as he panted with an open mouth. It was easy to wait for his tells, his brows pinched in a very specific way and his last few thrusts were always a little stiffer. As soon as you spotted them, you pressed up to whisper against his ear.

“Cum.”

And that he fucking did, snapping his hips forward into you and burying his face in your hair as he groaned. A few slow rolls of his hips to work himself through the aftershocks and he was finally pulling back to catch his breath. Looking down at where your bodies connected as he pulled out with a twitch of his cock.

“You want me to finish you off?” He licked at his lips before meeting your eyes again.

“You can at home.” You grinned at him, reaching down to rub yourself a few times simply because you liked his gaze on you. “I wanna get the fuck out of here.”

“Aye aye, cap’n.” Mary replied and tucked his cock away, buttoning up his pants and not bothering to straighten out his outfit at all. His hair was a bit of a mess and his shirt was half untucked, he definitely looked like he’d just gone at it in a bathroom. Sliding off the counter and turning around had you confronting the reality that you also looked like you’d gone at it in a bathroom. Making a frustrated noise as you leaned closer to the mirror to adjust your makeup as best you could, pulling your dress to lay straighter and fixing your hair just a bit. Then some toilet paper between the legs until you decided you were done as Mary simply watched on in amusement.

“Done?” Mary asked, but there was no rush in his tone as he admired you with a stupidly affection expression on his face.

“Yeah.” You leaned up for another kiss. “Alright, yeah, let’s bounce.”

Mary held your waist when you came back out and the looks you received made it clear it was obvious what you had been doing inside. Your confidence was boosted when Mary wore it like a badge of honour as he always fucking did, a shit-eating grin on his face as he made his way over to stack up two plates for the two of you. You didn’t stop him either. You were fucking starving, now.

“Good?” He asked as he gestured to the plate he made for you.

“Perfect.” You smiled at him and he held them both and ducked his head.

“I’ll follow your lead, m’lady.”

And with that he did follow you out, joining you in stuffing your faces as soon as you were in the car and making good on his promise to finish you off when you got home. Three more times until you were melted into your mattress and glad you went for entirely different reasons than you’d planned.

[hollandorks]

Do you have any advice for someone who’s attempting to foray into writing but already has other obligations? Any suggestions for balancing work and other aspects of your life with writing? Also have you encountered any issues with creating an original work based on a your own fanfiction such as toeing the line with being original and paying homage? You seem successful with all of your writing and so getting your thoughts would be so great!

*cracks knuckles* had to get on desktop for this to be sure I answered thoroughly! First of all, thank you!! I don't necessarily feel succcessful with my writing but it's really nice to hear.

I actually asked a lot of favorite authors about this (especially when I was in college!) during their Q&A on social media etc and the #1 response I got was: you have to make time. And it's so true. Obligations suck, work sucks, school sucks. Those things unfortunately have to come first just because, yknow, life!

So you have to carve out time to write and be purposeful about it. For motn I wrote a ton on my lunch break at work on my phone but I also like....gave up on laundry and keeping my house clean as often as I needed to in order to write more after work.

Even if it's only 15-30 minutes a day, you have to just purposely make time, which sucks. But also, prioritize it if it's really important to you. Like I said, I decided laundry and a clean bathroom were a lot less important (lol) when writing motn. Just decide what's most important and focus on that, even if only a little at a time.

On to the next part of the question: an original work from a fan work. Listen, you have to get rid of copyright stuff. For motn, I got rid of anything even remotely related to Batman. Symbols, names, etc. I renamed the vigilante, the city, revamped the backgrounds and such. And when I paid for a beta reader, I let her know that it was based on the Batman movie and she purposely looked out for stuff that was too similar! (Like a couple of lines she noted that it sounded "too Batman-y" so I changed it accordingly)

I can't answer about legal stuff (like if I'll have to delete the original motn) because I'm not there yet! I do know Ali Hazelwood wrote the Love Hypothesis, a hugely popular romance book, that was based on her own fanfiction, but it also isn't set in the same kind of world of the movie if that makes sense! (As in, it was a Star Wars AU fic I think, and the book is set in the "real world" so she likely didn't have to change much other than names!)

I definitely toed the line in a lot of places. I mean, I set it in a gritty, corrupt city that has a vigilante who is a billionaire with cool gadgets and an armored car and dead parents....but still altered enough to not be copyrighted. Again, I'm not really into the publishing process yet so I may get notes back (if I get any) saying it's still too close to the source material! But my goal is for 1) anyone familiar with Batman at all to get the gist and 2) OG readers of motn to still be able to recognize it!

Last but not least, it's super important to realize that every person is different and every story is different. What worked for motn might not work for my next project! And what worked for me, personally, might not work for you. It's just a matter of keeping at it and being persistent until you find what works.

Idk if any of this makes sense so feel free to send any other questions and stuff! I'm happy to answer them, I love writing and am passionate about it and love to talk about it!

[year2000electronics]

legion of stationery swap au w/ toads!

red streamer: colored pencils swaps with curator toad

why this supply was chosen: curator enjoys using the museum to give praise to mario’s various achievements, and even has a trophy room, much like a highlighter is used to give a bright coloration to the most important parts of a text

how they change:

 as a ‘tacky’ office supply, the curator toad would probably attack overlook tower bc it’s ‘not noteworthy enough’ and try to spruce it up by attacking it bc ‘this tower should be one fit for a king!’

as a regular old toad, colored pencils isnt nearly as monstrous, even missing his eyesore hair highlights. instead he’s a curator who’s just a tad too snooty, and this causes him to beg mario on his hands and knees to come visit, because his visit numbers at the musee are at an all time low

blue streamer: mc toad swaps with rubber band

why this supply was chosen: since i see mc toad as rb’s kind of ‘understudy’, i wanted to pick something that reflects that- an office supply that keeps things clamped together, but a different supply from a rubber band

how they change:

instead of an abandoned theme park and finding all the trapped toads near the end, you free all the staff across the park from mysterious clips- only to realize youve spelled your own doom as youve just been freeing the parts to binder clip the whole time. hes an actor like rb is but only does one show which is shogun studios themed

as a regular toad, rubber band is the one employee at shogun studios whos overly passionate at their job- rb is definitely friends with the hardcore roleplayers you meet at the beginning of shogun studios, and she will loudly call other employees out if he hears them dropping the facade 

yellow streamer: professor toad swaps with hole punch

why this supply was chosen: a magnifier and anything like it is used to make things bigger and easier to understand, like a professors job would be! however it also serves as an opposite to hole punch because when combined with the sun, a magnifier can easily turn deadly

how they change: as an office supply, prof is STILL obsessed w the sun altar! only this time hes more enamored with the POWER of the sun. so he tries to harness the power of the sun as much as possible and delves into the temple of shrooms to learn more about these ancient ones who wrote this stuff

as a toad, hole punch is also a researcher, but hes also a clout chaser- think of him as the flint cragley of origami king. hes notorious for being a hit with the unknowing public, but many a scholar complain that this little devil will accidentally break SO many historical artifacts

purple streamer: captain t. ode swaps with tape

why this supply was chosen: obviously bc the comparisons of a mathematical compass and a direction-pointing compass, but geographical tools like these are often used for cartography- plus i thought a tool so specific could give t ode a bit of a ‘lone wolf’ reputation among the legion

how they change: t ode wishes to explore the seas, and he’s marking down the coordinates of every island he sees- so what if he destroys the island in the progress? he’s an EXPLORER! and the ocean will be his map! if mario doesnt stop him, he might even bust open diamond island by force... leaving no stone unturned

meanwhile, tape is an adventurer like t ode, but instead of having mellowed out, hes about the guy youd expect to do bullshit like steal a submarine for the quirkiness of it all. also his ‘ancient one dialect’ is just the brooklyn accent. hilarity does ensue 

green streamer: shangri-spa toad swaps with scissors

why this supply was chosen: since the shangri-spa toads are all white (likely thanks to exposure to the stream of jungle mist), liquid paper would be a good equivalent to a ‘colorless’ supply that erases things in a similar way

how they change: since theres no one distinct shangri spa toad npc, its more the idea that a ‘head’ shangri spa toad would become liquid paper and said liquid paper would adopt a ‘holier than thou’ attitude and cover up anyones ‘ugliness’ with said liquid paper so that shangri spa can be ‘perfect’

meanwhile, scissors is the lucifer of the shangri spa ‘angels’- those dark spots are just dirt bc she hates looking like a toad, quit her job when bowsers castle crashed into shangri spa and has been nagging kamek nonstop into letting her join bowsers army instead

stapler stays the same (sorry buddy)

olly also becomes a second partner to mario in this au, and replacing him as the origami king is...

oh yknow

[firelxdykatara]

gods, ok, apparently i’m not done.

atla fandom? we need to have a chat.

(....ok that made me sound pretentious as fuck. and maybe i am, but this needs to be said, cause i’m getting....real, real tired of a Certain Corner of this fandom and as a result, this is gonna be a discourse-heavy post so feel free to scroll past if that’s not your bag. as always, my salt posts all carry the catch-all #salt for ts tag, which you’re free to blacklist/filter at your leisure. i’m Very Annoyed at the moment, which will probably come through in the following post, so just. yknow. be prepared for that. or ignore it, that’s perfectly valid too.)

under a cut bc i do care for my followers and their sanity i swear lmao

there’s a real serious issue in this fandom with not understanding what queer terminology actually means or implies, especially when applied to a fictional narrative.

i’m specifically talking about ‘coding’, here. (if i were in a more meme-y mood, i might have said ‘the atla fandom found out about the term “gay-coding” and haven’t shut up since’.)

to the people who say ‘zuko is gay-coded’, i have this to say: you keep using that word. i do not think it means what you think it means. because he isn’t. i’m sorry, but he’s not! and the fact that this is such a prevalent claim in this fandom is distressing, bc it says to me that none of y’all know what gay-coding is or when and how to apply it! please, i’m begging you, go and look up these terms and what they mean and when they should be used before actually trying to plug them into your critical analysis, because when you misuse them and then call other people delusional for disagreeing with you it casts a pall over the entire fandom and is, i think, the root of some of the worst toxicity this fandom has to offer.

and the thing is, there are cases where gay-coding would apply--for instance, a couple series that are famous for queerbaiting their audience by coding their main characters as being attracted to one another (sometimes even despite their openly stated sexualities) come to mind, but those shows bare no similarities at all to atla and how zuko was written and portrayed! (and it would be funny, if it weren’t so obnoxious and infuriatingly wide-spread throughout the fandom, because the only queer couple we actually seen on-screen in either show wasn’t even queer-coded in any respect, and they’re canonically bi! [yes, i’m shading korrasami, or more accurately i’m shading bryke for refusing to give ka the build-up and development they deserved].)

this absolutely isn’t to say that headcanoning zuko as gay is a bad thing or invalid in any respect. (although the tendency for zukka shippers to do this specifically to keep zuko away from katara and/or invalidate his canon relationship/attraction to girls is more than a little eyebrow raising. especially since sokka is usually allowed to be bi, bc fans have no problem letting sukka stay in the background bc it’s no real threat, while jetko shippers are happy to have both boys be bi. [possibly bc katara is less a threat to jetko bc jetkotara is every bit as valid as any single ship between the three, but zukka can’t exactly let katara join in, and if the potential exists for zuko to be attracted to her then canon giving them the far deeper emotional bond becomes a threat to zukka’s existence? idk for sure--you be the judge.]) i prefer to hc zuko as bi (and always have, long before the atla renaissance), bc i don’t think zuko being attracted to boys is outside the realm of possibility, and it isn’t a threat to my ship since zuko&katara had a deep and emotional bond in canon that is very easy to develop further into something that becomes explicitly romantic--but the headcanon itself isn’t really the problem (although what it’s often in service to can be).

it’s the strange insistence that this is the only way to read his character, bc he was coded that way and so anyone who doesn’t see it must be too straight to understand--and i really shouldn’t have to say why and how that is so incredibly fucking insulting. (the ‘hetero lenses’ comment wasn’t cute when it came from bryke six years ago, and the same sentiment being repackaged and delivered by zukka shippers ain’t cute now.)

calling zuko gay-coded not only demonstrates ignorance as to what the term actually means, and how to usefully apply it in critical analysis, but also validates the frankly bullshit insertion of institutionalized homophobia in the world of atla where it was neither needed, nor wanted, nor ever hinted at in canon. as a queer woman i’m still infuriated by one fucking comic panel shoving institutionalized and systemic homophobia into a world where it was entirely unnecessary (and doing this in the first installment of the franchise showcasing a queer relationship??? making korra and asami worried about ‘coming out’ when they could have just gone on to have cute adventures together and tell people ‘hey we’re dating’ and have everyone else be ‘that’s awesome =DDD’ [because it is, in fact, possible to just have a world without homophobia i promise!!!!!] double yikes, i’m still pissed at bryke about it), and i doubly hate that ‘zuko is gay coded’ has become so widespread that ‘ozai hates him bc he’s gay’ has become a staple in that part of the fandom.

not only does making zuko gay and implying (or outright stating) that ozai hated and abused him because of it completely undermine zuko’s character arc by making his abuse about his sexuality rather than ozai’s toxic pride and anger at seeing himself reflected in his ‘weak’ son, but it comes very close to outright stating that abuse and trauma are inherently gay experiences, and they aren’t!!! they really aren’t, i promise!!!

abuse and trauma narratives exist outside of ‘my dad hates me because i’m gay’. and, quite frankly, there are MORE THAN ENOUGH queer trauma narratives out in the world. we do not need to start trying to retroactively make them canon in a series where they didn’t exist! if you’re gay and see yourself in zuko and project your own experiences on him, that’s understandable and valid. that does not make zuko gay-coded. and honestly, the insistence that he is makes very little sense to me, because you’re essentially trying to give the show credit for work you put into interpreting the characters! why would you want to do that? why not own your own headcanons and take credit for them, rather than insisting they are canon and everyone else is wrong for not seeing them??? like, i’ve said before that i’ve always headcanoned zuko (and katara) as bi, and even support it with my interpretations of evidence from the show, but the difference between ‘i think zuko is bi’ and ‘zuko is definitely gay-coded’ is that i know that bi zuko is my interpretation of canon, and that it is work i’m putting into the show that wasn’t actually intended by the creators/writers, no matter how much sexual tension i read into the jetko swordfight.

and like, zuko’s character arc doesn’t actually parallel a queer one all that well to begin with. it’s easy enough to do the work and twist it sideways just enough to make the general points fit, but the fact is, zuko’s arc is not one of self-discovery. it’s not one of coming to understand something fundamental about himself that he can’t change, that he was hated for, and coming out to his father in a dramatic confrontation where he shows that he understands himself and doesn’t need his father’s acceptance to be fulfilled.

zuko’s arc is actually one of trauma and healing. and those can (and often are--like i said, there are more than enough queer trauma narratives in the world, atla really doesn’t need to be one of them) be part of queer narratives, for sure! but they aren’t uniquely queer. and zuko’s confrontation with ozai during the eclipse doesn’t read like a ‘coming out’ at all. (yes, i’ve seen that post. yes, i rolled my eyes and moved on, bc unlike some people, i’m capable of not clowning on correctly tagged posts i disagree with.) zuko is specifically confronting ozai over his abuse, because his arc wasn’t about discovering anything fundamental about himself (and therefore realizing that ozai was hating him for something he couldn’t change)--it was about realizing that he was not at fault for the way his father treated him. it was also about realizing that the fire nation was broken and corrupt at its core, and that his father was an aspect of that he needed to break away from so that he could help the world begin to heal.

he says it himself:

Zuko: No, I've learned everything! And I've had to learn it on my own! Growing up, we were taught that the Fire Nation was the greatest civilization in history. And somehow, the War was our way of sharing our greatness with the rest of the world. What an amazing lie that was. The people of the world are terrified by the Fire Nation. They don't see our greatness. They hate us! And we deserve it! We've created an era of fear in the world. And if we don't want the world to destroy itself, we need to replace it with an era of peace and kindness.

making this about zuko being gay and rejecting ozai’s homophobia, rather than zuko learning fundamental truths about the world and about his home and about how there was something deeply wrong with his nation that needed to be fixed in order for the world to heal (and, no, ‘homophobia’ is not the answer to ‘what is wrong with the fire nation’, i’m still fucking pissed at bryke about that), misses the entire point of his character arc. this is the culmination of zuko realizing that he should never have had to earn his father’s love, because that should have been unconditional from the start. this is zuko realizing that he was not at fault for his father’s abuse--that speaking out of turn in a war meeting in no way justified fighting a duel with a child.

is that first realization (that a parent’s love should be unconditional, and if it isn’t, then that is the parent’s fault and not the child’s) something that queer kids in homophobic households/families can relate to? of course it is. but it’s also something that every other abused kid, straight kids and even queer kids who were abused for other reasons before they even knew they were anything other than cishet, can relate to as well. in that respect, it is not a uniquely queer experience, nor is it a uniquely queer story, and zuko not being attracted to girls (which is what a lot of it seems to boil down to, at the end of the day--cutting down zuko’s potential ships so that only zukka and a few far more niche ships are left standing) is not necessary to his character arc. nor does it particularly make sense.

(and before anyone brings up his date with jin--a) he enjoyed it when she kissed him, and b) he was a traumatized, abused child going out on a first date. of course he was fucking awkward. have you ever met a teenage boy????)

anyway, uh, that was a lot of words, so have a tl;dr: zuko is not gay-coded. there is nothing uniquely gay (or even uniquely queer) about his character arc or characterization, and he was certainly not coded gay in an attempt to sneak a queer character past the censors. if anyone involved with atla was gonna try that, it would’ve been in lok, and as established, they didn’t even manage to queer-code the actual queer relationship before the last few minutes of the final episode. headcanoning zuko as gay is absolutely fine (though if it’s only done to keep him away from female characters he may otherwise be attracted to, that smells more like misogyny than anything else), but insisting that this reading is the only one that makes sense, and anyone who doesn’t agree must be straight (hello, queer woman here making this insanely long thinkpiece) is very much not.

ship what you like, but stop trying to invalidate other ships and other interpretations of characters just to make your ship seem more plausible. it’s really not a good look.

[straykidsreactions]

Reaction To: Finding Out Another Member Likes Their Crush

S T R A Y   K I D S  R E A C T I O N   T O : Finding out that another member also likes you, their crush. 

Genre: a lil angst + a lil fluff

A/N: If you’re interested, I’m willing to do a much fluffier part 2 to this. Just let me know~

Chan:

On one hand, Chan is a straightforward and competitive guy- he’s incredibly driven and he doesn’t like losing, especially when it comes to matters close to his heart. On the other hand, he’s also incredibly selfless. When he overheard Hyunjin talking to one of the guys about how adorable he found you, showing off a picture the two of you had taken together, Chan couldn’t help the way his heart sank. Of course he liked you, he’d liked you for a while and he thought he’d made it obvious to the other members by the way he always invited you to hang out with him (especially when he was buried in his laptop working until all hours of the night at his studio). But he wasn’t one to admit his feelings our right, so he couldn’t be mad at the younger member for catching feelings. 

Chan would ultimately be torn between being up front with you and admitting his feelings (which could ultimately hurt his friend) or staying quiet and potentially losing you. He’d become quieter and more tense when you were around, mostly because he didn’t want to step out of line and do something that could jeopardize either relationship. It’d be especially difficult for him because he also considered you to be one of his closest friends, and the fact that he couldn’t talk to you about the dilemma he was dealing with would weigh on him. It got to a point where you’d noticed his change in behavior, so you’d asked him if you could come by his studio to talk. Truthfully he’d considered telling you no, not because he didn’t want to see you but because he didn’t fully trust himself to not do something selfish. He’d never want to hurt Hyunjin but he feared his feelings for you were too strong and that, if given the opportunity, he might act on them. 

When you arrived at his studio, taking a seat beside him as he worked diligently on a few new tracks, it wasn’t hard to tell that something was off. His usual goofy and relaxed demeanor would be gone, and was replaced with a thoughtful and reserved version of the man you’d come to call your best friend.

*clearing your throat as you looked up at him intently, getting up the courage to break the ice*

“Chan, what’s going on...”

*not meeting your gaze as he continued to work on his computer, not bothering to remove an earbud as he replied*

“I’m fine Y/N I’m just busy that’s all.”

*sighing as you fiddled absentmindedly with your fingers*

“Did I do something wrong?” 

*frowning as he paused momentarily, turning towards you slightly without quiet meeting your gaze*

“Why would you ask that?”

*sighing in aggravation as you reached out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him towards you slightly and forcing him to meet your eyes*

“Because you won’t even look at me and I don’t know why! You’re acting like we’re not friends anymore or something and- and that really hurts, Chan...”

*sighing as his face softened, pulling his hand away and using it to remove an earbud so he could hear you more clearly*

“I’m not I just- I don’t know what to do. I-”

*shrugging his shoulders and forcing out a small, saddened smile*

“I don’t know. I think I have to accept that sometimes I can’t win, y’know? Sometimes the timing just isn’t right...that’s all I can say, really.”

Minho: 

He isn’t one to play games, or beat around the bush. That being said, he also isn’t one to take situations lightly especially when it comes to matters of his heart. He hadn’t confessed to you because, despite being sure of his feelings for quite some time, he was waiting to see if you liked him back. He didn’t want to risk your friendship if you didn’t feel the same way, so he’d been willing to play the long game- that is until he realized Felix also had feelings for you. He hadn’t out-rightly said that he was attracted to you, but Minho was quick to notice the younger’s adoring stare as you played games with him and a few of the other guys one evening at the dorm. In a way he understood it, you were particularly good friends with Felix and truthfully you were better friends with him thatn you were with Minho- but friendship didn’t necessarily mean that you had romantic feelings for him. 

After you’d left and Felix was alone in the living room, Minho wouldn’t hesitate to approach him about it- but not in an obvious or aggressive way. He had no intention of forcing Felix’s hand, or trying to come to an agreement on who should pursue you- Minho is all about the long game. It truthfully didn’t bother him that much to learn that Felix was interested in you, because you were free to choose whoever you liked. If you wanted to be with Felix, there was nothing Minho could do to change your mind. he’d be eerily calm about the situation, not because he didn’t want you as his, but because he’d rather play smart than hard.

*approaching the younger member who was sat comfortably on the couch, clearing his throat slightly before he spoke*

“You should tell (her/him).”

*giving the older man a confused stare as he looked up from his phone*

“What?”

*not moving from his position leaning up against the doorway*

“You should tell Y/N you like (her/him). You do, don’t you?”

*his eyes widening and his cheeks growing flushed as his embarrassment became apparent*

“Hyung I, how did you know that?”

*shrugging his shoulders slightly as he pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek, nodding thoughtfully*

“It isn’t hard to tell...”

*frowning slightly as he thought carefully on the older member’s words*

“Do you think (she/he) likes me back?” 

“You can’t know until you ask...just be upfront.”

*in thought for a moment, scratching nervously at the back of his neck as he inhaled sharply*

“I-I don’t know, Hyung...Y/N and I are really good friends, yknow. I don’t know if I wanna mess that up.”

*his usual intimidating demeanor softening slightly as he adjusted his stance against the doorway, running his hand through his hair as he thought for a moment*

“Fine then, tell (her/him) when you’re ready. (She/He) might be gone by then, though. Are you gonna be ok with that, if she’s with someone else?”

His question was weighted, though Felix had no idea to what extent. Minho had no intention of undermining your relationship with the younger member, though he doubted he even could considering your close friendship. Moreso, he wanted to be clear with Felix of his options, without 100% admitting to his own feelings. He didn’t think it was important to be vulnerable and admit that he also had a crush on you- since it was very possible you didn’t feel the same way towards him. As long as Felix was aware that there might be others out there vying for your affection, it wasn’t relevant for him to know that his own band mate was one of those people. 

“H-hyung what are you saying?”

*shifting apprehensively as he stared at Felix with a serious expression on his face*

“I’m saying if you want a shot, take it. If you don’t...someone else will.”

Changbin:

He’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt a bit when he’d overheard Chan inviting you to his studio to hang out with him while he worked. He knew the oldest member well enough to catch on to the fact that he probably had feelings for you- and while it wasn’t ideal, it wouldn’t discourage him. He didn’t mind a little healthy competition and, even though it sucked that it had to be between such a close friend, Changbin isn’t one to easily give up just to avoid confrontation. He didn’t have any intention of asking Chan to step down, ultimately the decision was up to you and that was fine with Changbin. Though he had been a bit more hesitant to admit his feelings before- the sudden sense that he might lose you gave him a new-found confidence that he’d be sure to show off to you. 

His strategy was to just be straightforward and honest, if you didn’t feel the same way he couldn’t help that- but he at least wanted to try. When you came over that evening to cook dinner with all the members and enjoy the evening together- he’d be sure to pull you aside, not caring who saw.

“Is everything ok, Binnie? What’d you wanna talk about?”

*nodding reassuringly, his hold on your wrist never letting go as he closed the door behind him*

“I just wanted to see you, Y/N, is that a crime?”

*laughing playfully as you shoved his shoulder lightly, rolling your eyes*

“You saw me when we were out in the kitchen, what’d we have to go into your room for?”

*giving you a confident smile as his gaze traced every inch of your face, the pad of his thumb running across your hand that he was still holding*

“It was too loud out there, here it’s just us.”

*feeling heat rise in your cheeks as you gave him a quizzical look*

“What do you wanna say that can’t be said around the other guys?”

*chuckling slightly as he took a small step closer to you, shrugging his shoulders*

“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe I just wanted to tell you that...you look really good tonight. Every night, actually...”

*your eyes widening as you became even more flushed than before, unaware of Changbin’s finger that was placed gently on the inside of your wrist- easily feeling the way your pulse quickened at his bold words*

“I-I...what?”

*raising his eyebrow flirtatiously as he continued on with his matter-of-fact tone of voice*

“I just think you deserve to be told when you good, Y/N...I know a lot of guys would probably like to be yours, I’m sure you have options. And I don’t have any expectations from you- you don’t have to say anything. We can go back into the kitchen and pretend none of this ever happened...”

*his eyes darkening as he watched the way you trembled slightly under his gaze, entranced in his words and his gentle but firm voice*

“I just want you know that...just because I’m your friend, doesn’t mean I’m not a man. Maybe it’s time you start seeing me as one.”

Hyunjin: 

Despite his confident stage persona, at heart Hyunjin is pretty shy and reserved- especially when it comes to his emotions. He’d had a crush on you for a while, but couldn’t ever bring himself to confess his feelings for you outright. He tried to make it obvious in other ways, one of his favorite things to do would be making playlists for you. He’d put so much thought into each song, insisting that it was just good music that you should check out, but the messages in the lyrics would all be subtly laced with his feelings. Unlike his subtle methods of making his feelings known, however, Jisung was much more direct and upfront. So when Hyunjin overheard Jisung talking to you on the balcony about his feelings for you- Hyunjin’s heart would absolutely sink. Jisung was one of his closest friends, despite how different they could be at times. Hyunjin hadn’t stuck around to listen to your reply or the rest of the conversation, he couldn’t be sure of your feelings but the fact that his band mate also had feelings for you (and was certain enough to act on them) would be enough to convince him that he shouldn’t intervene. Of course he wanted to be with you, and if you did end up accepting Jisung he was pretty sure it’d crush him, but he wouldn’t be willing to jeopardize his friendship with either of you. He’d still spend time with you and force a few smiles to keep you from worrying about him, but after a long night of overthinking and beating himself up for not admitting his feelings to you sooner he’d delete the playlists he’d made for you- which was the tipping point where you realized something was wrong.

You’d approached him after a photo shoot when you’d stopped by to bring the members lunch, and it wouldn’t be hard to tell that he wasn’t his usual comfortable self around you.

*talking softly so as not to be heard by the rest of the guys*

“Hyunjinnie...is everything ok? Y-you’ve been acting different recently...”

*averting his gaze as he shook his head, forcing a small smile*

“I’m not acting differently, Y/N, I’m not sure what you mean.”

*frowning as you inched yourself closer to him, looking at him quizzically as he continued to avoid your gaze*

“Yes you have been...you won’t even look at me now and you deleted the playlists-”

“They were just playlist, Y/N.”

His interjection was harsher than you’d anticipated, and it stung as the words left his lips. He’d never intended on pushing you away, he wanted nothing more than for you to be in his life- but he couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to watch you fall for one of his closest friends and the thought alone was too much for him. He’d rather keep you at arm’s length, not wanting to intervene or create a confrontation. 

“W-what?”

*his eyes darting around the room, focusing on anything except your face as he tried to keep his spirits up*

“They were just songs, it’s not a big deal...” 

*and then, despite every ounce of his body warning him against saying something jealous and biting, he continued*

“You have someone else who can make you playlists from now on, right?”

Jisung: 

On the outside Jisung comes across as a very bubbly, “heart-on-his-sleeve” kind of guy- but underneath that outward persona is a much softer and more sensitive side of him. He’d liked you for a while but he’d never said anything because, truthfully, he was worried about how it might damage your friendship with all the members. You were all so close and, though there were moments where he’d almost swear you seemed to like him back, he was worried that if he acted on his feelings he’d risk ruining the near perfect dynamic you all had. It wasn’t that he’d never considered it, of course his heart ached a little every time you smiled at one of the other guys or fell asleep on their shoulder- he’d tell himself if only you were his...you could fall asleep in his arms instead. But Jisung isn’t the kind of guy to rush into a relationship, especially not with someone he considers a close friend. He’d over-analyzed and been too in-his-head a thousand times, until one very late night at the studio.

He’d gone into the studio to record some vocals with Jeongin and Seungmin, finding moments of downtime in between his parts to rest and play on his phone. Seungmind had been recording for a while at this point, as as the clock struck well-past midnight Jisung could feel himself growing tired. The younger member beside him was also visibly tired, but as he leaned over towards the older member his eyes caught a glimpse Jisung’s phone- the homescreen of which was a selfie the two of you had taken together on a trip to the beach. It could’ve just been a nice photo between two friends- but of course it was much more than that to Jisung. Maybe if Jeongin had been a little more awake he would’ve picked up on the nervous glance the older member gave him as he pulled his phone away- but instead he said something that took Jisung by even more shock. 

*leaning his head on the back of the sofa behind him as he stared up at the ceiling, his voice barely above a shy whisper*

“Hyung...do you think Y/N is seeing anyone?”

*his eyes widening as he turned to face Jeongin, giving him a confused look*

“W-why do you ask?”

*his gaze suddenly shifting to face the floor as he fiddled with his fingers apprehensively*

“I just...I know we’re good friends, but that doesn’t mean (she/he) doesn’t have other friends...maybe even a boyfriend...”

*scoffing as he turned back to his phone, trying to play off the fact that for a moment he thought the youngest member had caught him*

“Yah, why do you care about that kind of thing, hmm?”

*without skipping a beat as he turned to face Jisung with a serious expression plastered across his face*

“Because...I like (her/him).”

The instant those words echoed out across the small room, Jisung’s heart would plummet. He’d liked you for so long and now one of his closest friends- someone he considered to be his brother- had just admitted he felt the same. Despite his usual forth-coming and straightforward attitude, Jisung would stay entirely silent. If Jeongin hadn’t been so sleep-deprived, it would have been easy to read the distraught and pained look on Jisung’s face as he sat frozen in his chair. He sat there in thought for a while, falling silent for so long Jeongin almost mistook him for asleep. 

“Hyung?”

*glancing over towards him without facing towards him, worried his face would give away to many of his real emotions*

“Mm?”

“Aren’t you going to say anything?”

Again, there was silence. On one hand, Jisung’s heart was unequivocally yours and it had been for quite sometime, but on the other hand he would never and could never intentionally hurt one of his members. He couldn’t muster ethusiastic or encouraging words, he could barely muster any words at all, but he managed to keep himself from saying anything that he knew deep down he could no longer admit. Jeongin had had the courage to admit his feelings, and he hadn’t. Maybe you deserved someone like Jeongin- someone who wouldn’t overthink every little move...someone willing to be bold even if it felt selfish. 

“Oh...does Y/N know?”

*shaking his head as he adjusted his position on the couch, now fully laying down as he prepared to take a nap*

“No...I don’t know if I should tell (her/him). I want to...but I don’t know, maybe that isn’t the right thing to do...what do you think, hyung?” 

Before Jisung had the chance to fall into a silent stupor of his own thoughts, he felt his phone vibrate in his hand. He glanced down, only to see your name flash across the screen. If signs from the universe existed, Jisung decided that must have been one. Without a second thought, Jisung said the words that had desperately been building at the base of his throat from the moment Jeongin admitted his feelings for you. It was selfish and Jisung knew it, but in that moment knowing that it was the wrong thing to say wasn’t enough to stop him from saying it. 

“Don’t. Don’t tell (her/him).” 

Felix: 

Unlike some of the other member’s who kept their feelings very much to themselves, Felix would be pretty obvious about his feelings towards you- and it would be especially obvious to the other members. He hadn’t confessed to you outright and in all honesty you hadn’t seemed to be picking up on his subtle flirtatious hints, but the guys were quick to spot it and teased him a bit when you weren’t around. While they often encouraged Felix to be upfront about his feelings he hadn’t built up the nerve to do so. Of course he wanted to be with you, but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable by mistaking harmless friendship for something more. He wasn’t quite ready to put his heart on the line-- at least so he thought. 

One particular evening he’d invited you over to the dorm to cook with him, an activity the two of you often did together as a fun way to de-stress and just have a nice time. Sometimes the other guys would join you and other times it was just the two of you, but on this particular occasion it was just you and Felix-- and Changbin. 

Of course Felix never minded when the other guys hung out with the two of you, though recently they’d intentionally been giving the two of you alone time in the kitchen in hopes that Felix might confess. It seemed a little odd that Changbin had parked himself in the living room, working on his computer with his headphones in just as you and Felix entered the front door. The guys usually tried to make themselves scarce if they knew you were coming over as a subtle way of encouraging Felix to open up to you- but tonight Changbin seemed to have missed the memo. Of course the instant you saw him you’d invited him into the kitchen to cook with you and, though he seemed very reluctant, he’d begrudgingly agreed. Felix wouldn’t say anything, truthfully he always had fun with you and Binnie-- though he doubted he’d be able to open up about his true feelings with one of his closest friends around. Felix is a pretty observant person, especially when it comes to people he’s close with, and he can always tell when something’s amiss, so it didn’t take him long to notice that Changbin didn’t seem particularly interested in your late night baking. He would smile and agreeably measure out the flour like you’d asked him too, but it wasn’t hard to tell that the instant you stopped looking at him his expression would shift and the mood drained from his face. After a while in the kitchen, you excused yourself to use the restroom, and as a silence fell over the room Felix was quick to bring it up, worrying that something might be weighing on his friend’s mind. 

“Hyung, are you ok? You seem kinda out of it.” 

*shaking his head as he adjusted the baseball cap on his head, forcing a weak smile*

“Yeah, yeah I’m good...actually I should head out- I gotta go to the studio and work on some stuff but, uhh...tell Y/N bye for me, ok?”

*giving him a concerned face as he stopped the elder man, grabbing his arm lightly as he started towards the door*

“Hey, hey man I can tell something’s up, ok? For real, tell me-- you’re scaring me now, hyung. Are you in trouble or something?”

*shaking his head as he pulled his arm away from Felix’s grasp*

“I’m fine, I promise...I just shouldn’t be here right now.” 

“Wh-what, why? I thought we were having a fun time? Look if you think it’s because I was gonna talk to Y/N tonight about, y’know, how I felt or something, it’s ok! I’d rather we all have a nice time together, I can talk to (her/him) some other time.”

*inhaling sharply as he pulled off his cap to run his hands through his hair apprehensively, shaking his head as his gaze met Felix’s momentarily*

“It’s not that I just...I don’t think it’s good for me to be here, I’m just gonna head to the studio ok?”

*growing concern evident in his voice as he stopped the older man once again, worried that maybe he’d offended him or said something wrong in some way*

“Hyung seriously just tell me what’s going on?”

*snapping as he turned towards the younger member quickly, his voice sharp but still soft enough to not be heard outside the small kitchen*

“I like (her/him), ok! Is that what you wanted to hear, man? I can’t be here right now because I know how you feel about Y/N and it’s fucked up for me to even feel the way I do-- but I can’t help it and if I stay here I’m gonna do something I’ll regret, ok?!”

Felix’s face immediately fell, his eyes growing slightly wider as his once playful and teasing smile faded from his expression, leaving him looking perplexed and hurt. Changbin was one of his best friends and he’d just admitted to having feelings for you-- despite knowing that Felix had every intention of asking you to be his. He’d feel confused, hurt, and honestly a little bit betrayed-- but more than anything he’d be conflicted. 

“W-why did you tell me that, hyung...I- what am I supposed to do with that?” 

His voice was soft, barely above a whisper as Changbin stared at the floor, clearly feeling ashamed for letting his feelings slip so carelessly. 

“I shouldn’t have said anything, Lix...I’m sorry.” 

“Are you gonna love (her/him)?” The question echoed throughout the hollow room that suddenly felt ten times colder and Felix’s tone deepened as his frustrations started to slip through the cracks.

“Are you going to take responsibility for your feelings? Are you gonna show up for (her/him) no matter what-- do you really think you’re what’s best for Y/N, I mean, be honest with me!” He wasn’t yelling, his voice wasn’t carrying nearly enough impact to be heard by others outside the conversation, but he might as well have been. The bite in his tone was harsher than he’d anticipated, and by the slightly shocked look on Changbin’s face it was obvious he hadn’t expected the level of hurt Felix was clearly feeling. 

“Felix, look bro I-I wasn’t planning for this to happen, ok, I never wanted to be in this situation...”

“But we are in this situation, now, Bin...whether we like it or not.” His voice was softer now, more dejected as he stared at his closest friend, void of expression. Felix was never to fight unnecessarily, especially not with his members who he considered to be like his brothers. That being said, he had no problem being upfront about what was upsetting him if he felt it was necessary-- not holding back as he addressed the difficult situation head on. Despite his stern words, the hurt would be evident on his face as he tried to figure out what he was supposed to do in this situation-- something he never expected to be faced with. Changbin was silent for a moment, listening to the faucet turn on from the other room as the two men realized you’d be back momentarily. 

“I’m not gonna act on it...if that’s what you’re asking.” 

*quiet for a moment as he heard your footsteps echoing against the hardwood floors, turning toward his friend with a serious expression*

“Should we pretend this never happened, then? Because we can...I’m giving you a chance to take it back, and I’ll forget you ever said what you said.” 

The two paused for a moment as you rounded the corner, tapping absentmindedly on your phone without realizing the severity of the conversation happening in just the other room.

“Tell Y/N or don’t, hyung-- I can’t tell you to do...but I’m not giving up. I don’t wanna fight you for (her/him)...but I will if I have to.”

Seungmin:

There aren’t going to be a lot of words exchanged when it comes to Seungmin finding out that Minho had a crush on you. In all honesty, there weren’t a lot of words exchanged between the two of you even before Seungmin found out about Minho’s feelings-- something about you made him ridiculously shy and though he did his best to talk with you and hold conversations he always found himself blushing and stumbling over his words. Minho isn’t one to admit his feelings outright, especially not to the other guys, but Seungmin is incredibly intuitive and it didn’t take long for him to realize the older member saw you as much more than a friend. Part of it filled him with anger and frustration, but more than anyone else Seungmin would feel those things towards himself. He’d be hard on himself for not having the courage to talk to you more, watching with an ache in his chest and Minho effortlessly had conversations with you, made you laugh, and even taught you a few dance moves after practice. It was like it was effortless between the two of you, and though a part of Seungmin knew you’d have been just as friendly towards him had he extended he couldn’t work up the nerve to say something. 

It may have taken him a while to be honest with you about his feelings, but this push was exactly what he needed. He wouldn’t expect anything from you- he fully anticipated that you’d reject him, after all, he didn’t talk with you much and was more often than not caught admiring you quietly. But one late night on set for their latest photo shoot, you’d stopped by to support them and bring them food- and he’d take that moment as an opportunity to finally open up to you. He knew there was a possibility that what he was doing was really idiotic, after all, Minho might confess to you and if the two of you started dating it’d be more than a little awkward around the younger member. But even though Seungmin realized all of that, he had feelings weighing on his heart that he couldn’t keep bundled up any longer.

When you arrived at the studio where they were shooting with bags of take out from the boy’s favorite restaurant in hand, Minho was quick to help you unload everything. Seungmin watched for a moment, wondering if he’d once again lost his opportunity. But as you started walking around the set and bringing each of the member’s their food, he felt his heart skip a beat and he knew he’d have another opportunity to say something, despite the fact that his hands were shaking.

*walking up to him and smiling shyly as you handed him his take out order, looking around awkward as he appeared to have a cold expression on his face*

‘Uhm..I hope they got everything right on your order...if they didn’t you can tell me and I’ll go back and have them fix it.”

*letting a genuine smile seep through his nervous exterior as he thanked you, taking the bag from your hands*

“I-I’m sure it’s fine...thank you.”

*nodding softly as you went to walk away, feeling a lull in the conversation to be his way of asking you to leave”

Just as you took a step away from him to leave, he’d reach out and grab your wrist, his eyes just as wide as yours at his own bold action. You turned towards him, glancing between his face and his hand that was wrapped snugly around your wrist as he gently pulled you back to him.

“I-I was hoping I could say something to you, Y/N...if that’s ok.”

*giving him a slightly confused but understanding expression as you nodded*

“Uhh..sure, Seungmin...is everything ok?”

*nodding as he let go of your wrist, holding his hands close to him to hopefully hide the fact that they were still shaking slightly from the nerves*

“I...I know I don’t talk to you enough. I know you probably think I’m cold towards you, or that I don’t like you- but it isn’t true. Any of it...I-I do want to talk to you. I want to be your friend but...”

*looking away as he glanced over towards Minho on the other side of the studio and feeling his nerves spike*

“I don’t expect you to take responsibility for this, Y/N...and I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable...but I w-want to be more than your friend.”

*taking a deep breath and running a hand through his hair apprehensively as he studied your face for any signs of emotion at all, but you still looked to be mostly in shock*

“I-I’m sorry I...I don’t want you to think you owe me anything, you really don’t. If you want to date someone else, I understand. I just wanted to tell you, if I’m quiet or act cold towards you...I hope you’ll understand why.”

Jeongin:

Jeongin is the kind of person who’s quick to show his emotions when he’s happy and sharing in other’s excitemen, but when it comes to his own hardships and sadness he quickly becomes closed off. Despite being the youngest in the group, Jeongin's mentality is oriented towards not burdening others with his problems-- and he especially doesn’t want to feel as though his members take pity on him. Maybe that’s why he’d never admitted to the others that he had a crush on you-- because a part of him could tell from the beginning that he wasn’t the only one to have those feelings. 

Though Jeongin can be playfully confrontational and doesn’t mind calling his friends out over small things, when it comes to actual conflict Jeongin is more soft-hearted and isn’t one to address things immediately. So when he noticed Seungmin’s cheeks tinge red every time you sat beside him, or every time you paid him a compliment, Jeongin wouldn’t have the nerve to bring it up right away. He knew Seungmin was equally soft-hearted and the two as a pair wouldn’t have much need for direct confrontation, but his lack of confrontation shouldn’t be mistaken for giving in-- because there’s no way in hell Jeongin would give up on you just because his friend liked you too.

When he’d invited you over to the JYP office where he was working on some lyrics late in the evening, his intentions had been completely harmless. The two of you often worked together on things like that, he’d tease you by saying that you were his good luck charm but you had no idea how true that really was. He always wrote more freely and from the heart when you were around, something about your presence always seemed to coax out the romantic side of him-- which proved very beneficial when it came to writing love songs. 

*checking your phone as Jeongin worked silently beside you, finding a peaceful quietude between the two of you until you came across a text message that made you laugh*

“Oh my god, Innie look what Seungmin just sent me-”

*holding the phone up for Jeongin to see, his face morphing into a tense frown as he looked over at your phone and the funny video that was playing*

“Y/N I’m busy...just send things like that to me and I’ll watch them later, ok?” 

*frowning slightly as you nodded, apologizing for interrupting his work flow*

“...only send them if they’re actually funny though.” 

He knew he he shouldn’t have muttered the last part under his breath, you wer close enough to hear him and when he glanced over at your confused expression he knew he was on the verge of saying something he might regret. 

“What do you mean? You didn’t think it was funny?” You laughed softly as you pulled the video clip back up, giggling as you rewatched it. 

“I dunno, I thought it was funny...Seungminnie always sends the funniest things.”

Maybe he would’ve let it slide if you hadn’t said that, if you hadn’t giggled the way you did, if you hadn’t called Seungmin by his pet name-- but you had. He could feel tension boiling in the pit of his stomach, a mix of jealousy and angst at the fact that he couldn’t admit on the spot that your giggle made his heart skip a beat. 

“Well if you think he’s that funny maybe you should help him write lyrics late at night instead...”

“Jeongin what does that have to do with-”

“Forget it...forget I said anything...” He interjected, fully aware of how disjointed his logic had become as he tried to maintain the frustration building in the pit of his stomach. You slid your chair slightly closer to him, your expression softening as you realized something was bothering him beyond the silly video. 

*pulling on his sleeve gently and looking at him with worried eyes*

“Innie...what’s going on?”

*inhaling sharply at your sudden touch, continuing to stare at his screen for fear of crumbling completely if he were to meet your gaze and muttering quietly under his breath, unsure of whether you could hear him or not*

“Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like if you were just mine, y’know...”

[sunnnfish]

Rambling about tbhk thoughts & theories n stuff

Hi I’m thinking too much about how much is still unanswered in tbhk :) this is all over the place but i tried to organize it a little bit but it is very very ramble-y and it might not make much sense. Please feel free to talk to me i have so many thoughts (but also not many answers)

I also bolded some of my favorite thoughts for maybe easier reading

(Also crazy spoilers about literally everything watch out)

Gonna put it all under a cut bc its long but please read 🥺 i talk about like straight up everything and everyone (tsukasa, Sakura, natsuhiko, amane, tsukasa, nene, kou, mitsuba + what is going on with them)

Tsukasa, Sakura, natsuhiko:

Okay so like why did tsukasa only recently appear after supposedly being dead for like 50 years cause like hanakos been around yknow ? Does it have something to do with the seal? Cause like tsukasa is clearly very clingy to hanako so you’d think he’d stick by him as soon as they died but they apparently hadn’t seen each other in a long time. and how did Sakura get into like a contract or whatever with him ? and why can natsuhiko see and interact with supernaturals ? Natsuhiko is so weird what is his deal. why in the world does he know how to turn into a supernatural ???

GASP i just had a thought so like tsukasa says he only grants wishes for the dead so like how would Sakura get into some kind of deal with him if she’s alive? She could be dead but idk it kinda does and kinda doesn’t work.

Hanako, tsukasa, seals:

And as for hanako and tsukasa like when did they get those seals and why ??? And like during the part where kou asks yako about rumors being changed hanako at the end like touches the seal on his cheek and ?????? What does that MEAN ??? Did he have to get sealed because his rumor was changed ? Like what was that about ??? Also why in the world are hanako and tsukasa so powerful? They are so strong and its crazy. Also I REALLY wanna know what hanakos boundary and yorishiro are and what purpose his boundary serves.

Tsukasa, plans, rumors:

Also why is tsukasa changing the rumors ? Is he trying to like kill the 7 wonders or what ? Or remove them from power cause like yknow breaking their yorishiros removes their control over the boundary and like he did straight up kill number 3 to put mitsuba in control so does he want to do that with all of them? He also keeps messing with nene and like why.... i just wanna know his plan...

Also how come they haven’t like put anyone else in charge of the boundaries after their yorishiros got broke? Also also why is hanako the leader despite being like the youngest like what did he do ??? He is also pretty bent on breaking the yorishiros too like couldn’t they just change the rumors instead of breaking the yorishiros? Like they did with the mokke? I think hanako has some other agenda too.

Amane:

Also thinking about if tsuchigomori knew about tsukasa ... like when amane was alive yknow like where was tsukasa ? Did he go to school? Was he in a different class or what ?? Also did amane immediately kill himself after he killed tsukasa or did he like go on for a bit afterwards ?

I’ve also had a little theory about the whole “I’m not going anywhere” scene, so like amane gives his lunar rock, that he has had and treasured since he was 4, to tsuchigomori and that seems a little odd to me, but its seems especially like su*cidal behavior yknow? If someone’s got a plan to, yknow, die, then they sometimes start acting different and start giving away things that are important to them. I’ve also seen recent theories about how maybe tsukasa got them involved with something supernatural while they were alive so maybe amane was like planning to die or something... and I’m also still super intrigued that amane was the only human to defy what was written in their book, and it makes me wonder about what was written in tsukasas book, like was he supposed to die? Was it written in amane’s book that he killed tsukasa or was that different too?

The severance:

Also thinking about the whole lead up to the severance and like how that went down—like number 6 shows up and kidnaps Aoi of all people and like sacrifices her and stuff and it all makes me wonder if hanako planned it? Like he clearly thinks the severance is a good thing and that aoi being sacrificed extended nene’s lifespan so like did he plan it? Did he ask number 6 to do a sacrifice cause like they haven’t done that in YEARS like why would they suddenly do it again? Number 6’s rumor hadn’t been changed or anything so there was no reason to do that (unless i missed something).

Red house, mitsuba:

And then there’s the freaking RED HOUSE like my goodness like what does it have to do with mitsuba??? Why did he have a picture of it? Why was the picture black until nene found it? Like the house is cursed and it seems like the picture might be too, since nene and kou mysteriously showed up at the house. There’s of course all the theories that its probably the yugi family and that it might be connected to Nowhere now so that’s fun but I still really wanna know what this has to do with Mitsuba

OH i also just remembered yknow like at the beginning of the hell of mirrors arc mitsuba is like different mitsuba and doesn’t remember anything but at one point nene mentions hanako and he like reacts like “hanako?” Like he knows the name but like stuff keeps happening so that’s quickly forgotten BUT like what does that MEAN !! Why does he know hanako !!! When he’s not supposed to remember like anything !!!! Zdfghgjhfdhfj

Oh also also what in the world happened to mitsubas arm and why does he keep it hidden?? It clearly still works cause like he grips things but he still keeps it hidden so ??? Also like his eye too idk if something happened to it or if its stylistic but its only shown vaguely like once or twice, and in scenes where he’s alive it’s much more visible so ?

Nene:

I also think nene is totally gonna die or at least turn into a supernatural somehow because like so much official art and stuff really points to it. With like pictures of the four (nene, hanako, kou, mitsuba), nene is always tied in with hanako and mitsuba while kou is shown separately or with different motifs. The ones that really come to mind is the one where nene, hanako, and mitsuba and tied together with a rope, it being tied around mitsubas neck, hanakos chest, and nenes leg, while kou is positioned away from them. With the recent chapter with that dolls leg coming off and like the references to dolls n stuff like i think something crazy is gonna happen to her leg at least. The other one that comes to mind is the one with the four pictures of their middle school entrance ceremonies, where hanakos, mitsubas, and nenes families faces are scribbled out, while kous is fine. At first you think it’s because teru and tiara are like actual characters, but in amane’s and tsukasa’s, one of their faces is scribbled out too so its not about whether or not we know the character. So like nene is continuously shown with the same symbolism as the supernaturals soooo....

Kou:

Also thinking about how kou was WAY to ready to die for mitsuba like he’s 14 !!! And do y’all realize he ACTUALLY for REAL fell off the building right then and there, not expecting mitsuba to save them ! He was fully ready to die at the drop of a hat and as much as it shows how much he cares about mitsuba like that is not healthy babey. Like think about yourself for once kou, stop hurting yourself to help others !!! People care you !!! (I’m people)

Misc:

And then i still have thoughts about the minamoto family but mostly i just wanna know more about their family and history like where are their parents ? Also that reveal that teru like protects the whole town was like crazy.

Oh also gotta wonder like why so many of the ghosts are attached to the school ?? Like i dont think any of them actually died at the school so why do they haunt the school? Shijima died at a hospital, mitsuba died like in the town supposedly, and we dont know about the yugis but idk how they would have a knife at the school unless they were doing some kind of after hours ritual. Also no adult ghosts.... all the adults are pure supernaturals.... hm.

Anyways that’s all i can think of right now and its a lot :) I’m so sorry

[horrordirtbag]

my theories on why Jason didn’t go home after drowning & peeking into his brain

Ok so people always act like the Friday the 13th continuity is an incomprehensible mess which always annoys me because it really isn’t, but there are a few things that aren’t ever really explained. Most of it’s pretty small shit only super fans argue over, like how Jason got home from Manhattan or if he can teleport or not

But there is one thing that is never explained or even addressed in any of the 12 movies: why Jason never went home, and admittedly it remains the series’ only big plothole

Part 2 puts clear emphasis on the fact that Jason’s body was never found in the lake (which was mentioned in p1), and that he spent the rest of his life living alone in the woods. But, why wouldn’t Jason just go home if he didn’t die?

Well, after pondering this in the shower, I’ve come up with a few theories that I think are pretty satisfactory. In short, I find that there are only 3 general explanations as to why he didn’t:

1. voodoo supernatural shit

2. He didn’t want to; the woods offered him a newfound freedom that his past life couldn’t.

3. He couldn’t

and now I’ll break them down more (there is some light sexual abuse stuff mentioned below so be warned)

This will also double as a deep dive into Jason’s brain lol

Ok, so first of all the voodoo shit. This is my least favorite and I only put it in there for necessity. Basically, this is shit like the deadite theory or other weird JGTH nonsense. Y’all probably already know I hate that theory, but there are other ways involving the supernatural that might work, mostly revolving around Crystal Lake’s vague death curse. But this generally goes against the notion that part 2 sets up so I’m not going to dwell on it.

Second of all, maybe he didn’t want to. This could be for a number of reasons, but the way I see it, while yes Jason loves his mother, returning home to her would mean returning to being the outcast again, to being bullied and neglected. Here, in the woods, he’s not an outcast anymore. He’s free. The woods are his world now, where he can do whatever he want and forget the world that betrayed him.

Then there’s also the possibility that may be kind of taboo for this franchise, but maybe Jason was actually mad at his mother. Or maybe not mad, but he felt betrayed by her, too. When we see Jason drown in part 1, he’s crying for his mother, and of course she never came. She was the only one that loved him, the only one that protected him, and she wasn’t there when he needed her the most. Now, obviously this is because Pamela was working in the cafeteria and couldn’t hear him, but little Jason wouldn’t know this. All he would know is that the one person who loved him never came. 

Now, fast forward to 1979, and Jason watches his mother kill to avenge him. It’s the first time in 20 years that he sees that his mother did care, that she was doing all of this for him. He might even begin to feel guilty for causing her all that pain. And then, of course, seeing her die shortly after would send him over the edge. When he realizes someone out there did love him, they’re taken away. The world has been nothing but cruel to him just for being different, and all that sadness turns into anger.

Sure, there were a few times before then that Pamela tried to avenge Jason, those first 2 murders in 58, poisoning the water and setting a few fires, but it’s possible Jason didn’t witness those since they were much smaller occurrences, and also his mom didn’t give a hefty monologue at the end lol

Now... third of all.... maybe Jason physically could not. And this could also go in a number of ways. But, let’s take this from the beginning. Crystal Lake, from what we know, is a very rural place. The main part of town seems to be pretty damn far from the actual lake. So, little 11 year old Jason probably would’ve gotten lost, and would’ve had to learn how to survive in the woods, and if he came across anyone he probably would’ve been too afraid to approach them because yknow... no one ever loved him. 

Granted, though... this would only account for the first few years of Jason’s woodland life. In a few years tops, Jason probably would’ve figured out a way home, unless Pamela moved out of town. Which is why I think it’s most likely a combination of this and what I talked about above. After learning how to live in the woods for a few years, he might’ve grown to like it compared to his old life, so by the time he learns how to get out, he might choose not to.

So that brings me to my final explanation, and this is really just a completely out of left field fan theory. Everything else I’ve tried to keep as close to canon as possible without taking too many liberties, but for this final theory, maybe Jason was kidnapped. Held hostage in some perverts basement for years after he drowned. Maybe that was his first kill when he escapes, maybe that’s why he hates sex (an idea I’m usually against cuz I don’t see any reason for Jason to hate sex, but in this scenario it would make sense). He could’ve been held captive up until the 70s.

But that’s a very extreme fan theory. Personally, I think it’s that Jason didn’t want to. He embraced his new found freedom... and then felt nothing but guilt for it when he watched his mother die. 

So, the overall point of this post besides an obsessed fan thinking way too deeply into a slasher franchise? I guess to explain that, while yes it is a plothole, it is one that can be reasonably explained. It seems unlikely at first, but the more you think about it the more sense it makes, at least to me it does.

I also want to add, I think this element of mystery is pretty fun. Sure it’s a result of script writers not caring too much, but it adds to that urban legend feeling. The mystery is endearing and I find trying to explain them is very fun for fans

So if anyone actually read all of this, let me know what you think, or if you have your own ideas

[adammilligan]

i ABSOLUTELY want to hear about the fantasy au!!!

OKAY! this is gonna be a ride so strap in. if it's incomprehensible and confusing then whatever let's do this anyway

so adam is from a town up in the far north, right. he lived there with kate until he was fourteen and kate (who worked as the town healer) passed away. kate was respected in the town because she was the best at her job but adam, as a bastard child, could never quite manage to win that same respect from the townspeople (and ofc it being a small town that same distrust generally gets passed down to children as well) so when his mom died adam was like yknow what? fuck it??? i'm leaving i'm out and if i'm gonna die of starvation sooner or later i'm at least gonna visit someplace beyond this icy wasteland for the first time in my life. so he takes what he knows about traveling through the snow and what little possessions he can carry with him and he just fucking. bails. if the town wants a healer they can do it themselves❤

so anyway he travels south and he damn near doesn't make it because he's fourteen and entirely unused to traveling because he's lived in the town his whole life and doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. but he's also stubborn as all fucking hell and doesn't let himself collapse until he starts seeing deciduous trees instead of coniferous and then he's like "wow. that's pretty" and just fucking faceplants. right in the grass.

so of course he doesn't die yet, right, he's found by somebody who drags his scrawny ass to some shelter and it turns out she's a sort of traveling healer??? and like...adam learned a lot from his mom but she was supposed to start REALLY teaching him when he was fifteen and obviously that didn't happen. so adam decides, since he has literally nowhere else to go and nothing else to live for basically, that he'll ask to be the woman's apprentice and (to his MAJOR fucking surprise) she accepts. so for the next six-ish years he basically spends time learning how to properly heal people and traveling along EVERYWHERE (he absolutely has a little summer fling with kristin in a seaside town. this is non-negotiable) and eventually all good things have to come to an end, right? so the woman isn't OLD old but she's certainly hitting an age and she decides that she's gonna settle down and just pass all her shit on to him and though he doesn't wanna leave the only person he's known for years he decides that he stills wants to Go Out and See Things and Help People and so they part ways.

meanwhile, in the world of royalty, there's a battle brewing because one kingdom just Will Not Fuck Off at the border between them and michael's acting as the prince regent right now because chuck is indisposed one way or another and he just sort of decides yknow what? fuck it? if these motherfuckers aren't going to leave then we're just gonna make them leave? and takes a party of knights down to the border to make them fuck off.

adam, who just so happened to be headed straight for the border, is not amused. but we'll get back to him in a moment.

anyway the fight starts, shit gets wild because there were more people down there than they thought, and michael's party is pretty much forced to in the midst of battle (like some "EVERY MAN FOR THEMSELVES" thing) but the PROBLEM is, michael gets hit and he gets hit BAD. like someone sliced him up and then a fleeing horse trampled him for good measure. the thing though is while michael's party was forced to flee, the opposing side was also forced to retreat because more of their numbers were taken out than he thought. so michael's essentially bleeding out on the forest floor, adam's been hiding up a tree this entire time because....what the FUCK just happened. and then he sees someone who's very obviously royalty just laying on the grass and decides to go up to him and poke him with a stick because if he's dead then HEY⁠—free stuff he can loot off his body to sell, right? give him a break he could always use the coin.

so, as it turns out, the dude's not dead! fan-fucking-tastic, right?

and adam TRIES to leave him behind. he really does. but then he thinks about how he would've died if the healer hadn't helped him and he thinks about what his mom would do and he bangs his head against a tree a couple times before finally turning around and performing the speediest emergency patch job on this man who might not even make it and all the while he's just like "don't wanna be here. people are gonna accuse me of murdering nobility. i have better things to do that be executed. cmon" and he's not even sure that the royal dude's gonna MAKE IT but he does his best anyway. he's using up supplies for this. royal dude better be fucking grateful.

once it finally seems like royal dude's not gonna die if adam moves him more than two inches, adam (veery slowly) drags him to a nearby cave system that he'd seen when he'd passed through the area before and decides to just look after him from there.

eventually, after adam has been looking after him for a While, royal dude wakes up. and he's Not Happy about it. so, naturally, he and adam get into an argument where he declares he's a prince and how dare adam lay his filthy hands on him yada yada yada and adam's like lol i'm not the one with the major fucking injury but alright. but also he's worried that michael's gonna kill him after he gets better but he doesn't want to leave him to die either and also he put too much work into this pretentious mf to just leave him now SO he might as well risk death.

and michael TRIES to do things independently at first. he REALLY does. he tries to the point where he keeps tearing his stitches and adam starts absolutely raising hell about it because his supplies are already wearing thin enough without angryfuck mcstubbornmeister fucking ruining them every chance he gets. and then he just fucking storms off for literally eight hours and michael's like "FINE. DIDN'T NEED HIM AROUND ANYWAY" but is also worried because he really can't move around all that much and he doesn't WANT to die and just as he's sort of accepting that he's been left adam storms back in with new supplies that he spent the last of his coin on and literally just starts raving about how if michael fucks these up too adam will LITERALLY smother him in his sleep. prince or not. and honestly adam's surprised michael didn't try to forcefully claw his way out of the cave but michael's just surprised that this commoner didn't just leave for good.

they both make an effort to get along a little better after that.

and then they actually get to talking and realize that they have more in common than they thought. which is odd, because they're also so different but they're similar in all the ways that matter and eventually they start trading stories while adam starts helping michael finally move around again and oftentimes the caves would echo with their laughter, so loudly would it reverberate around the stone walls. when michael is finally able to start walking (albeit REALLY stiffly) without assistance, he insists that he's going to go hunt because adam's been doing it for the both of them all this time and he hates just sitting around doing nothing. and when he ends up unable to catch anything because the pain flared up a bit too much, adam doesn't say a word, just flashes him a smile and shoots down a rabbit that they share without a word. and then adam lets him get water from the river instead, and somehow they end up laughing and soaking wet because they started a little splash fight even though adam starts fussing about the wounds afterwards.

but then the day comes; the day that michael can finally move around normally without too much strain, and at first neither of them acknowledge it. at first, they still sit by the riverbank and fish and tell each other whispered stories (whether fact or fiction) by the cooking fire, faces tanned from the heat and sitting a little too close than they'd like to mention. but michael brings it up one day, with hunched shoulders and a weary frown at the reminder, that he has a kingdom to rule. that his father was out of commission, and the longer he stayed hidden away the weaker the kingdom would seem, and adam sighs and concedes.

michael asks, a little hopeful, if adam would come with him. he could be appointed as the court physician, and he wouldn't ever have to worry about money or shelter or supplies ever again. but adam is used to small houses and worn paths and the ache of travel and the hard earth as his bed and his pillow, not downy mattresses and pampering. besides, constantly having to be in the presence of all those snobby nobles would be the absolute death of him, and he knows it.

so he says no, and very nearly changes his answer when michael's form deflates, the prince regent's face pulling into something downright sorrowful, and adam promises to accompany him to the border before they part ways.

they make it to the border, and it isn't even two moments of them awkwardly standing there shuffling their feet before adam thinks to hell with it and pulls the prince regent of one of the largest kingdoms in the land into a hug, except...they don't separate. they don't separate until adam pulls back, just enough to look michael in the eyes, before kissing him. it's soft and light and chaste, something that begins and brings with it the promise of never quite ending, even after they finally break apart, their foreheads gently meeting as they stare at each other.

michael asks if they'll ever meet again. adam doesn't know what to say, because life is tumultuous and messy and he might die before the year is at an end, so he only smiles. he smiles and he kisses michael once on the cheek and tells him that his kingdom is waiting for him, all while thinking (but never voicing) that it is his kingdom that needs him and michael has never been nor ever will be bound by the wants of a nameless travelling healer, and they finally unwind from each other and turn their separate ways, determined to not look back even as their minds scream for them to.

michael heads south, towards his kingdom, and adam heads west, always veering just the smallest bit north but never quite making it back to the town of his roots⁠—what holds him back, he's not sure yet. but there are people in need of help, and he'll be damned if he's going to let them suffer.

and so, it ends.

(until the unwritten sequel, where michael returns to his kingdom⁠—only to find it in utter shambles)

[faquarlofmycenae]

Faquarl scenes through the years; rated from 1 to 10 (by yours truly, the known stan)

Amulet of Samarkand

The Kitchen Brawl: 9/10

Hey, audience, look, the introduction of a character who would become very important! There’s knives, having conversations in the midst of danger, a hint of that true tentacle-y form, very much here for all of that. We get a nice view of what the Bartquarl relationship is like, that they’ve known each other for quite some time and are thus familiar with the other. Faquarl does end up getting blasted into a wall and after the scene ends got the short end of a nasty punishment, courtesy of Simon Lovelace, but since we don’t see the end of that very unpleasant day, let’s not dwell on it too much.

Freeing Bartimaeus from the Tower of London: 100/10

Perfect from beginning to the end, and so much that Faquarl being set on fire isn’t even on my radar a lot. He basically makes Bart jump through a hoop, yells at him for falling for an illusion and causes a bunch of ravens to vomit or die by essentially flashing them and gets doused in gasoline - solid stuff. There’s also talks of revolution while squatting in a scrub. WRT that girl he wanted to kill: we don’t know whether she just had bad vibes. We just don’t know.

Brief Cameo at Heddleham Hall: 4/10

He just hangs around in the kitchen in his preferred form which, yknow what, I’ll take what I can get. Brief speaking role when he tells Nat to get lost and just reinforces the point that this spirit fucking hates children in general. 

Golem’s Eye

No actual scenes :( there’s a mention but otherwise it’s a 0 on the Faquarl-o-meter, its strong points lie in other areas. During the events of this book he’s also in an off-shore safe hoping Nathaniel dies in a fire or gets devoured by flesh-eating insects or something so it looks poorly for him. 

Ptolemy’s Gate

Meeting Verroq: 1/10

well, we don’t know that this is Faquarl and neither does Bart. He’s also a little too far away for us to hear what he says so as a known Faquarl enthusiast, this is poor stuff, boys. 

The Hopquarl reveal: infinity sign/10

Pack it up, girls and gays, this is what peak performance looks like. The reveal is done so well and truly has you realize that shit is hitting the fan. Faquarl shows up with his new material form, ass shots, titties out, beat face contoured, no pain despite being on Earth and Bartimaeus is shaking in his feathers. Kills a bunch of high-level spirits with the same ease as opening a jar of pickles, has his little monologue, throws Bartimaeus in a silver casserole filled with fish as he smugly states that he was Right All Along in his belief that revolution would be here one day and is on his merry way to overthrow humanity - what a guy. No one does it better than him. I’m in awe and have this scene eternally burned into my mind. This is also where we get a callback to the infamous scrub scene and the good ol’ “in some cultures they kiss, in other they set each other on fire”. And they say romance is dead.

Masquerading as Hopkins and going public: 8/10

Listen, this is the closest I’ll get to a proper interaction between Faquarl and Kitty so her calling him a traitor which in some way had to remind him that he technically betrayed the Other Place does a lot of things to me. He also beats up the Mercenary with his own bare fists which is defo among the Top 10 Funniest Moments In The Bartimaeus Sequence so that does a lot too. We figure out that Faquarl is the true mastermind behind the entire spirit rebellion and that as much as Nouda is leading the whole thing, our interdimensional entity is the one whose truly calling the shots and the brains of the entire operation - and has in fact been doing so even with Makepeace, Hopkins and Lovelace! Ugh, I know spirits don’t have a ‘brain’ but if he had one, it’d be so wrinkly and full of diligent neurons! 

Mass creation of hybrids - 3/10

He doesn’t really do a lot besides picking out names in a book for the magician to summon a spirit into his body. Also gets his ass kicked across the room by Jessica Whitwell (there is definitely a conversation to be had about how Faquarl is prone to getting injured or otherwise taken out).

The final confrontation: 9/10

Hoo boy, this is both a perfect scene but also because of the part where he, y’know, is reduced to his atoms, it’s sad (and still perfect and in a bizarre way a... worthy send-off? Dying on your own terms, that’s what I’m talking about.) The final conversation between them and the eventual realization that you screwed things up for yourself are a fucking gutpunch. Faquarl being speechless for the first time in ever and having an honest true-to-the-bone with Bartimaeus, no doubt the being that has known him for the longest amount of time... it’s just raining on my face. I’m lying in bed and listening to Angel by Sarah McLachlan on some Spotify playlist of Sad Songs. 

Ring of Solomon

Picking up Bartimaeus: 9/10

Well, it in itself is not on the level as the Hopquarl reveal or the Tower scene but 1. this is the first time we see him in YEARS GOD BLESS, the heavenly gates opened and a choir of angels is singing 2. we saw him again after he technically died. Also back when he and Bart didn’t loathe each other so that’s very flavorful. We also find out that Faquarl’s aesthetic is a nice contrast to Bart’s “gotta keep it sleek and sexy at all times” in the way of “purposefully ugly and very proud of it because fuck human beauty standards”.

Plotting in the quarry: 10/10

My Bartquarl-shipping self ascended during that scene. We got a break from the usual strained relationship that is frenemies-who-also-have-a-sort-of-sexual-tension-with-each-other and see them be actual allies. There’s shittalking magicians, agreeing on that your workmates are idiots and chilling together - and let’s not forget mutual recognition coming from Bartimaeus! In the words of Mo’nique, “I would like to see it”.

Saving Bartimaeus: 6.5/10

Short but sweet. Faquarl pops out of nowhere and thus saves Bart from being eaten by one extremely pissed marid. “Don’t tell anyone, I got a reputation to uphold” is Faquarl speech for “you’re more than welcome”. Bickering and the enforcement of the point that yes, Faquarl could effortlessly wipe the floor with Bartimaeus if it ever came to a full-blown fight and Bart wouldn’t swindle his way out of it. 

Fighting the Edomite magicians + meeting Asmira: 7/10

Once again, nice contrast of Bartimaeus’s aesthetic and Faquarl’s. Kills more Utukku than Bart and thus wins the #1 medal for that melée - but also again is wounded. Doesn’t miss a single beat about voicing his desire to simply do as any good spirit would and eat Asmira, which, yeah, let’s not kill our deuteragonist, but also... I get his mindset so let’s gloss over that one. Brief monologue about the Evils Of Humanity and “I hate Earth, it all deserves to burn” which shows that Faquarl has been on his shit for quite a while and I have a lot of respect for that even though by that definition we are all Evils of Humanity. 

Gaining freedom: 5/10

A little short but beggars can’t be choosers. We find out that he has been pestering Bart about not killing Asmira for hours past hours past hours and honestly? That’s so on-brand. Drag his essence. Then he gets freed properly (unlike Bartimaeus) but not before he sees all the nasty things his master has been up to in his torture/sex dungeon. “Faquarl was gone. Faquarl was free.” like an absolute legend. We also get his name before he was Faquarl of Sparta, to which the URL of this very account is referring to. It’s also the last time we see him in the book and we’re only halfway in so :/

But, as we all know, hope dies last and maybe we’ll come across his canon self once again to see and rate more scenes.

[mavmax]

The Art of Vulnerability | Maverick + Sooyun

When: June 21st, 2021

Where: Maverick’s Apartment

Warnings: Emotional breakdown, Depression, Self-loathing

Featuring: @sooyunjeong

Maverick laid on Sooyun's lap, his mind was in and out of watching what was on tv and his own clouded mind. He felt guilt, but he didn't show it to her, he wanted to be brave for her, be tough, and protect her. That was what he had to do, after all, but, even then, he could feel himself fighting back tears, when one managed to slip down his cheek, and he tried wiping it away before it landed on her lap.

sooyun jeong

Sooyun was watching a kdrama, a show that was beyond cheesy romance and figured it was a decent show to watch while she unwind from practice and her hand began throbbing from over using it. She was preoccupied by the male lead aggressively shouting in korean when she felt him move, glancing down at him on her lap, she reached down to smooth his hair with her left hand and leaned over to catch a look at his face. “Are you okay?”

Maverick froze at Sooyun’s question for a moment. Should he say that he was okay? Smile it off and nod and go back to the show? Or should he show the vulnerability, open up fully for once and let down that wall that he knew he had put up at Pride. He let out a shaky sigh, and shook his head quietly.

sooyun jeong

Sooyun realized that this was going to be something serious, her mind racing through reasons on why he was upset, so many ideas racing that she tried not to appear overwhelmed. Instead she tilt her head, “what’s wrong?”

Maverick could feel a part of him fighting to not even show a semblance of vulnerability. Part of the wall wanted to go up, to show that he got this, that he could lie and say he was tired, but in reality...the other part wanted to open up to Soo, he was hurt, exhausted, frustrated all at once. "I'm tired," He began softly. "I'm tired of not feeling like I'm wanted by anyone."

sooyun jeong

Hearing his voice, the difference between his usual tone and this one, she realized that perhaps he was hurting. Sooyun turned his face to look up at her, “what are you talking about? You are wanted.” She said softly, it pained her to see him like this, she can see the vulnerability in him and it made her realize he was always having this facade up.

When Sooyun turned Mav's face towards hers, his vision was instantly blurred by tears as he shook his head. "People are always like 'hey, you want him? cause I don't', whenever I do something that's just...a part of me. I've had that, my whole life. There was a part in my life, where I felt really unwanted and whenever I hear it, I can't help but wonder if everyone's...better...off without me. So, there's that," He responded calmly, trying to fight back the tears that threatened to escape him. He was finally letting down his walls.

sooyun jeong

Sooyun felt an immense guilt fill her chest, thinking back to when Soo thought she was joking but realized it was a trigger for Maverick, her eyes soften as she used her thumb to wipe away the tear that was ready to fall. “Mav…” she trailed off, her voice shaking, swallowing down the feeling as she gave him a smile. “Life without you would be boring, when I said that…when I said those words to Blaine, I was joking—not knowing that it affects you deeply. I’m sorry I said those words without thinking about your feelings. I was just angry at what your ex did to you without your consent and I took it out on you.” Sooyun lowered her gaze, talking about feelings and such was still a hard thing for her to do but she was slowly growing to understand. “I love everything about you Mav, even the parts that annoy me, I still find myself loving you even more.”

Maverick took a shaky breath to calm his own breathing, it was hard to even address his own feelings without feeling like he was drowning in them. Soo's touch, however, kept him afloat. He took a breath, closing his eyes for a moment before opening them again. "It's not your fault, you didn't know," He said softly. When her gaze shifted, he knew that it was hard for Sooyun to open up, too. It was something both of them had in common, after all. He reached his hand up to her cheek. "It's something I didn't think I'd ever talk about, my sisters know, Eric knows by proxy...but, I wanted to be strong for you, that's why I didn't want to say anything, you know? I love you and I just...I wanted to be that protective boyfriend."

sooyun jeong

“You don’t always have to be the strong protective boyfriend Mav, you’re human, just be open with me.” Soo reassured him, meeting his eyes once more and leaned into his touch, taking in his features and pushing some of hair away from his face. “I’m tired of people thinking they need to be strong for me, I’m a big girl and I can handle anything thrown my way…I want you to be okay….to be mentally okay as well.”

"I've always had to...be the protective one, you know? The one time I just...existed, well, we know what happened there," Mav chuckled dryly, but he nuzzled into Soo's touch. His vision getting clearer as he focused on her warm brown eyes. "I know...trust me, I know you're capable. Hell, you broke your hand for me and I can't help but feel guilty. I don't want you to hurt yourself for me," He sighed. "I wanna be okay, I wanna be vulnerable around you, you know?"

sooyun jeong

Sooyun rolled her eyes and lightly flicked his forehead, “I didn’t break my hand for you, I broke it because I was so mad that I didn’t hold my hand correctly for a fist. All I was thinking is just one bop to the face would do but I didn’t think she had it in her to fight back.” She grabbed his hand and brought it up to her mouth to kiss it, “you need to stop blaming yourself for something that isn’t your fault.”

Maverick chuckled lightly at Soo’s finger flick and he used his free hand to rub his forehead lightly. “I know, I just…I still felt responsible, you know? I know she deserved the sock to the face which, was epic, but, yknow,” he sighed. He smiled at her gesture and as a result he slowly got up to finally face her properly. “I’ll try,” He whispered, leaning in to press a kiss to her lips.

sooyun jeong

Sooyun let her lower lip poke out in a pout and wrapped her arms around him, nudging his forehead with her own, “Since I’m still learning new things about you…we should make up a word to inform each other we are upset instead of storming out of the room. When you left abruptly, I wanted to chase after you but obviously they made me go check my hand then I had to go on stage. I don’t want you to face these situations alone…I want you to be able to lean on me.”

Maverick smiled at Sooyun’s cute pout and curled into her instinctively, letting his own warms wrap around her small frame. He rested his forehead against hers and let out a soft sigh. “Yeah, we can do that…I’m sorry for storming out, by the way. I tend to do that before I lash out and I don’t ever want to at you,” He said softly. “No, no, I get it, which by the way, you killed it on stage. Broken hand and all,” He teased. “I won’t face it alone, not anymore…” His hand went softly to her cheek and he then said, “This sounds basic, but maybe code red? Or just saying red? I could also hold your hand if I say it if we’re standing next to each other?”

sooyun jeong

“Code red can work…red…it’s simple and easy to remember.” She agreed with him, she wanted to be able to be there for him, through the good and ugly of it. She knew relationships weren’t always going to be fairytale like, it was supposed to be hard to learn to lean on someone other than yourself. “If you lash out on me, I will find it incredibly hot to see you pissed and allow you to yell at me,” She admitted with a smirk

"I was thinking the same, nothing too complicated, you know?" Maverick offered with a small smile. It was definitely huge progress than before. It wasn't always going to be rosy and easy. Sometimes there was going to be bumps in the road, sometimes they were going to clash, but through Sooyun, he learned how to lean on someone emotionally rather than go into it independently, because after all, a relationship was two people and their emotions, not just one. "Babe," He laughed, shaking his head. "Are you saying you want me to be a little more aggressive?"

sooyun jeong

Sooyun laughed, "Yes that's exactly what I am asking, because instead of storming out, just grab my hand and pull me away somewhere quiet and you can take your frustrations out on me--or if you need a shoulder to cry on." She let her cast rest onto her lap, she wanted Maverick to at least lean on her in tough times, to think that two months ago she wouldn't have cared yet here she was.

"I'll do better and not storm out on you, but I also won't yell at you because I know that shit sucks...but, if you want me to be aggressive, all you gotta do is ask," Mav teased, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "But yeah...I'll let you know when something's bothering me from here on out, I promise." And he meant every word. A few months ago, she would've been the last person he'd go to, but she was there for him and understood him.

sooyun jeong

"But what if I want you to grab me and we leave and I allow you to take out your frustrations on me?" She playfully batted her eyelashes and laughed, reaching up to caress his cheek, "As long as you know I am here now, i will support whatever choices you make--I'll most likely question it but I will be here."

“I’ll wind up giving you so many hickeys,” Maverick chuckled at that thought of how rough he’d be with Sooyun. He nuzzled his cheek into her hand and the devilish grin had softened into his usual smile. “Thank you, Soo. And just know, I’m here for you too, okay? I know this opening up thing isn’t easy for both of us, but, I wanna make it work for us. Just like you’re doing for me.”

sooyun jeong

"Like you don't already? Who are you trying to play?" Sooyun laughed, the sound of the show playing some sappy music made her realize the show they were watching ended but at the moment she didn't care, Maverick was opening up to her and she enjoyed that. "We're working on it, we've both been hurt as you stated so of course it will take some time for the both of us to learn how to trust again. I want you to know I would never cheat on you...even though I was notorious for having multiple lovers, I can be faithful."

“But they’re tiny hickeys. The other ones out of frustration would be huge,” Maverick chuckled. It definitely didn’t help they were having this talk as the sappy kdrama music played in the background but at the same time, it was fitting for the moment. At Sooyun’s words he nodded with a smile, his hand reaching up to her cheek to caress it softly. “You’re right…and for what it’s worth, you won’t ever have to worry about me straying from you or getting hurt. I’ll be careful. I promise.”

sooyun jeong

"Small or large, they're still hickies," Sooyun laughed, "And besides, pretty much everyone knows we're dating at this point, which by the way, I love how we said we'd keep it on the down low, yet here we are." She knew her manager was most likely having a ball with that, soo on the other hand didn't care as long as people knew that Maverick was her boyfriend. "You better because, I don't think I can break my left hand or maybe I can ask Jae for advice."

“Hmmm…I guess you’re right,” Mav chuckled as he carefully watched her neck. “My favorite one is fading though, bummer,” He pouted for a moment. “Oh, definitely. Which is funny cause we did say we’d keep it on the low but here we are, holding hands and being cute in public…I like it though. I feel like it just brought us closer together you know?” He pointed out with a grin. “Um yeah let’s not break the other hand but hey push comes to shove, I’ll make out with you in public…or we could ask Jae for the best course of action?”

sooyun jeong

Sooyun could feel the heat of his gaze on her neck, the spot where the hickie he placed, it had her shiver in delight of him replacing it. She mentally told her hormones to relax as she tilt her head, "I mean...you can always place another one there again." She suggested innocently, but she knew that once he started anywhere near her neck she would allow it to go further. "I feel like Jae would just suggest to whack them in the face, but making out in public isn't so bad."

A smirk curled on Maverick’s lips as he watched Soo purposely tilt her neck towards him to show off the fading hickey, but also give him a free invite to add onto it. “Hmm,” Mav purposely leaned forward, letting his breath fall onto Soo’s neck. “Tempting but I should behave,”. He chuckled. “Yeah that’s true…let’s do less battery and more making out.”

[comradelup]

Hey bruh can we get an epic infodump about that BOTW au, because I am HERE for some self indulgent content, hit this niche Zelda/TAZ fan audience with that tasty au over here

i just woke up so this might not be too legible but :3333 also obviously spoilers for botw for ppl who haven’t played it and don’t wanna be spoiled

(most of it is under the cut though because WOW this got long akdnajfnsjf)

okay so taako is link and lup is zelda. instead of being a princess and knight they’re a king and queen co-ruling faerun. there isn’t really a king rhoam figure in this? like they don’t have a parent/guardian they pops up in the memories, it’s just them ruling the kingdom. when the prophecy came, they knew one of them was the royal with the goddess’ blood in them and the other would be the hero with the darkness sealing weapon. obviously both of them would have the same blood or whatever since they’re twins, but it comes down to who can properly wield the magic. as it turns out, lup is the magic twin and taako is the weapon wielding twin. their enemy, usually ganon, is instead the hunger.

there is still an old civilization of ppl with ancient technology, though i don’t really have a name for them, so i’ll keep calling them sheikah. BUT, there is a modern day group of people dedicating themselves to learning all they can about the sheikah technology in order to prepare for the return of the hunger. they are the institute of past research and exploration, IPRE for short. it is made up by the rest of the seven birds, among a few others.

the champions are davenport, merle, magnus, and barry. lucretia is kinda how she was in TSC canon, just sorta tagging along to write everything down, but that changes once they make the grand relics. speaking of, the light of creation replaces the master sword in this instance. it has the power to fight off the hunger, as well as take the shape of any weapon taako can imagine. that’s how we get the flaming raging poisoning sword of doom and the krebstar. but lup and barry, ever the scientists, are like “is there any way to… break the light into pieces? so more people get super powerful weapons against the apocalypse?” so they do

some of the relics are different, though. the philosopher’s stone doesn’t change things, but it changes itself, keeping that weapon-changing property of the original light. obviously, since it’s a seventh of what it used to be, it isn’t as powerful. but it’s still pretty damn powerful compared to the rest of the weapons in the world. the gaia sash is different too, adding healing on top of the plant magic. the animus bell basically makes undead armies instead of the soul switching magic from canon. basically, the relics’ powers are altered to better fit a combat situation. also they’re the gifts given to taako after the divine beasts (replacing urbosa’s fury/daruk’s protection/etc) so they would need a more combative/practical use. the healing part of the gaia sash is basically this au’s mipha’s grace akfnajfnsj

one relic in particular is interesting, and that’s the phoenix fire gauntlet. with lup’s struggle to unlock her powers, she created the gauntlet as a sort of conductor for magic energy. she’s incredibly proficient in normal magic (esp evocation) but this goddess magic is tricky to unlock, and it’s super frustrating. the other stuff came so easy to her, so why is this hard? unfortunately, the gauntlet didn’t help with that :-(

lucretia and her relic are also interesting in this au. as i mentioned in the ficlet i posted, she intended to use the bulwark staff to protect the champions, and she couldn’t, so she blames herself for everything that happened. obviously, it’s not her fault and i make myself sad thinking about her being sad T_T but as a result of this, plus a bit of good ol paranoia, she uses the bulwark staff to create a big bubble shield around phandalin (this au’s kakariko villiage) the rest of the IPRE live here (basically the BOB, so killian, carey, johann, etc)

i won’t go too into detail for the rest of the story, as it’s fairly similar to botw canon other than that, but some things to note are this: the divine beasts are different, so as to suit the champions better. magnus and merle have a bear and owl, respectively, but idk what’s for barry and davenport (definitely open to suggestions akdnajdns). also, the yiga clan is called the shadow brethren, because i love me a good amnesty reference. it’s leader is kalen, and he’s an actual threat to taako, unlike kogha. i’d imagine the brethren tie to magnus’ divine beast because kalen ties to his storyline. also, the gauntlet basically becomes the bow of light in this au, aka what taako uses to defeat the hunger once and for all

other characters to note are:

kravitz and the raven queen, basically purah and symin in the hateno ancient tech lab. they’re a mother and son duo, with TRQ living through the calamity and kravitz being born afterwards

lucas and maureen are in robbie and jerrin’s place as another mother-son duo in the same position as krav + TRQ; maureen lived through the calamity and lucas was born after

(everyone is basically human in this, or at least has human lifespans, so 100 years is definitely a long time for someone to live through. maureen and TRQ developed magic to prevent them from aging all those years. lucretia was the first volunteer to use this magic, but it kinda failed and instead only slowed down her aging. that’s why she’s her older self when taako wakes up.)

the goddess hylia is instead istus. not much changes there, she’s just the goddess everyone references akdnakdjs

yknow the characters that help link get to the divine beasts in canon? like sidon, riju, etc? they’re replaced by other characters depending on what relic taako is going after, and it correlates to canon. so when he’s going after davenport’s divine beast/the oculus, he meets angus. when going after the owl/gaia sash, he meets hurley and sloane. so on and so forth. though he DEFINITELY meets julia in refuge and she DEFINITELY does NOT have a crush on the hero of legend who piloted the bear divine beast 100 years ago ;)))))

differently from botw canon, taako actually develops a strong relationship with lucretia, who is pretty much impa with a different backstory. as he gets his memories back he realizes he had six incredibly close best friends and now five of them are gone, so he kinda gravitates to her when he’s with her

one more thing to note is that after taako defeats the hunger and lup is free, she combines the relics into the light and uses it to bring the dead champions back because FUCK death separating this family. lup “phantasmal and resplendent” adventurezone would never allow it. if her brother gets brought back from the dead, so do her friends and her husband, thank you very much

and that’s… basically it! i could go more in depth with the taakitz/blupjeans side of things, but this is long enough akfnskfnskfn but if anyone wants to know anything else i’m always open to talking about it :D

[dumbdancemomssideblog]

S1E1: The Competition Begins

okie dokie first ever episode of dance moms rewatch starts now :0 i actually remember watching this the very first time it aired on lifetime because i was channel surfing and saw a commercial for it earlier that day. that was the summer between 8th and 9th grade. ah memories... i didnt know what to expect because i did dance when i was a kid but not on a competition team and it was mostly ballet so i was pretty unfamiliar with this whole world. 

anyway lets begin. this is probably gonna be a longer post than what i’ll end up writing for the other episodes in season 1 bc the first episode introduces so much info, just a heads up

Act 1: (aside: yes its insufferable to divide this into “acts” when its really just like “segments separated by commercial breaks” but thats how they’re called in actual tv scripts so im just going with that cuz i cant think of a better/easier way uwu)

god this is so fucking early 2010s lmao

i miss these days where they were just talented nobodies from pittsburgh on a low budget reality tv show that nobody even knew would be successful. and the bad hair and makeup but idk if that was also just a 2011 thing lol

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES GREEN SCREEN INTROS IM DYING

the chalkboard !!!! they werent doing the pyramid on the mirror yet 

(apparently abby never did anything similar to the pyramid thing but the producers made her and it became a whole Thing on the show and thats why the moms were like wtf is this bullshit the first week)

mackenzie looks like a toddler. chloe is so tiny. theyre the 2 who changed the most physically over the course of the show

i remember watching this for the first time being used to ballet lyrical and jazz but never having done or really seen acro/gymnastics in dance choreo and being SO flabbergasted. i was thinking “a chin stand is not dancing what the actual hell” and yknow what? i was right

melissa: “my boyfriend knows how much i spend on dance because he signs the checks...............hermehhemrherrmehermh” (the most awkward laugh omg)

maddie is wearing a fucking bumpit in her hair i cannot

melissa deadass just said out loud “im here for my daughter im not here to make friends” ok everybody mark that one off on your catty women’s reality tv show bingo card!

camera man accidentally getting in the shot filming right in front of the huge wall-mirror.... what is this, amateur hour? i’ll let it slide since its the first day of filming rehearsal but step it up, boys

aw i forgot about maddie getting sick and crying :/ poor kid

melissa saying “i cant stand a chid that’s sick” sounds so edited like the intonation made it seem to me like they just cut her off mid-sentence i love lifetime

oh this was still when they were wearing normal stuff to class/rehearsal like black leotards bc they werent getting sent a trillion crazy 2-piece dancewear outfits for free yet bc they werent famous, man those were the days

Act 2:

[obligatory b-roll footage of downtown pittsburgh] 

the maddie chloe paige trio !!!! this is making me feel so nostalgic

“knees together, paige. you’re bow-legged, you need to fix that”

“you’re tall, you’re skinny, you’re a beautiful girl, you can do better than this. FOCUS” shes like 10 abby what the hell

“people think im tough and i guess i am but i would rather be the one to make your kid cry in the privacy of my studio than at an open-call audition in front of hundreds of people”

okay unpopular opinion alert: i agree with a lot of what abby says about stuff like this but her delivery is flawed, to but it euphemistically, that being said i think the production team of the show and the fame inflating her ego changed all of this somewhere over the course of the second season and its really sad to see :/ i can expand on that thought later tho

aw paige crying bc abby correcting her (but not saying anything personal or out of line, just technique corrections (at based on what we were shown, we dont know everything she said oop)) shes a sensitive kid she never should have been put on this show :( 

paige looks exactly like her mom i didnt realize that before

nia and holly were done so dirty throughout the whole series in terms of the narrative the producers set up about nia being the weakest link :/ 

Act 3:

cathy’s entire involvement in the show from the very beginning was so painfully obviously scripted (or at least heavily staged) 

vivi was also done dirty by the show’s narrative and she was only 6 and they presented her as like the butt of the joke bc her mom’s “character” was crazy and also she wasnt good at dance. i wonder how she feels about the show now that shes a teenager hmm. she really seemed not to give a fuck about dance for better or for worse when she was a kid tho so maybe she doesnt care ?

in what universe would an owner of another competitive dance studio bring her own kid to another studio more than an hour’s drive away, AND be under the impression that she could compete with them in a week, especially when they showed the kids’ and moms’ shocked reaction at the start of the episode to having to learn a dance in a week and compete it? like really what is the point of cathy and vivi being a part of this show im so ????

Act 4: 

THE MINISTER DAWN OUTBURST HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT THIS

this fight is about 50% of what got them a full season 1 and then things took off from there tbh. the other 50% was the electricity dance but thats a point for next episode..... :)

“you’re a minister act like one” “YOU’RE RIGHT I AM A MINISTER! LET’S PLAY THE BIBLE GAME ABBY, WHEN JESUS SAW THINGS THAT WERE WRONG HE WENT AFTER THEM, AND YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DO THIS TO MY KID” ma’am i think the wrongs jesus addressed were of slightly more importance than a preteen being told she cant take a dance class if shes violating the studio’s dress code

this is so good bc it wasnt staged afaik and there are regular students all throughout the building just STARING at them like lmao what even is going on, so im pretty sure this is real???

regardless, yeah dont wear socks and a tshirt to an acrobatics class, thats common fucking sense

another cameraman-in-mirror sighting, but its hard to think about angles when filming spontaneous drama like this, so i wont count it against them

“you called me fat” (i remember that being in the episode but thats not on the episode available through lifetime on demand that im watching from my moms tv hmmmmmm) “i told you to close and tuck in your two-piece costume, theres a big difference. HOW CAN YOU REMEMBER THAT BUT YOU CAN’T REMEMBER TO TURN YOUR FEET OUT” uh scream

she really called the police on this woman i cannot handle this. can you imagine being a police officer responding to this call? 

“we have a parent thats out of control. pardon? no shes doesnt have weapons, just her mouth” iconic

im sorry im still not over the hair and makeup. the flat hair with the side bangs. the black pencil eyeliner applied all the way around the eye. why did any of us think this was a look :( why did we do this :(

Act 5:

they went all the way to phoenix to compete 3 numbers, only 2 of which are shown in the episode.

i think this is the only time they ever went to west coast dance explosion because its an actual competition and they wouldnt allow filming after this lol i think they did go to wcde one weekend in addition to a competition where they were filming but it wasnt shown or mentioned at all

abby not wanting brooke and paige to have a french manicure on stage if theyre the only ones in the group with the french tips is perfectly valid idk why it was framed as some crazy micromanaging shit

i also am really not a fan of the whole “high functioning alcoholic wine mom/crazy stage mom” schtick they were pushing for the first few episodes of this show

in retrospect i feel like so many of the quips in this episode were intentionally fucking crazy just to get the audience engaged enough to want to watch more episodes...

“see those girls down there, those girls with the legs? thats who you’re up against, so step it up”

abby warning them that its dangerous for their little party hats to slip when they’re doing aerials and pirouettes and stuff: “what if you were at radio city music hall and they had the ice rink out and you were doing a side aerial and fell 13 stories down and died, huh?” fantastic point abby thank you for saying that to 5 girls ages 8-12 less than 5 minutes before they went on stage. perfect time for a teaching moment like that :)

i forgot how bad the camera work was in the first few episodes for footage of their performances. like they really didnt think the show’s audience would actually want to watch the kids dance, the producers and editors thought we just wanted to see stage mothers yelling at each other lol

also the mic feed over the music of abby talking to herself giving them corrections while watching them dance on stage.... im so glad they quit doing that. i dont remember them doing it like that for any other episode, i hope im right

this choreo is very basic and its a cute dance i guess but its very cringe in some places and for the first episode this is such a forgettable group routine

their scandalized reaction to placing third and the sad piano music is so funny honestly

and maddies reaction in the interview which was almost definitely fed to her by the producers where shes like “i win all the time i dont really know what its like to LOSE i always win or get runner up” so many of maddies lines from season 1 interviews sound so fake and she was probably too naive to know they were getting her to say that stuff so they could paint her as a conceited brat (she was EIGHT)

the trio costume was so ugly im sorry (is it supposed to be like a 50s pinup bathing suit?) (and the headband thing looks so bad) and also the music is bad but they had no real authority over that bc of copyright stuff

chloe’s headpiece coming forward and the ensuing drama was another moment in the episode that really solidified public interest in the show imho.... 

“YOU’RE IN THE BAR HAVING A DRINK AND YOUR KID’S HEADPIECE IS FALLING OFF” “it did not FALL OFF it CAME FORWARD it was FINE!!!”

“mistakes happen, we’re human.” “YOU are. mistakes like that dont happen to me”

and then the “next time on dance moms” with the WILDLY INAPPROPRIATE electricity dance, of course. genuinely that was really smart of the producers in terms of structuring things to generate intrigue lol. and obviously it ended up working....

[nobodies-png]

OKAY, SO I DEADASS CRIED WHEN AQUA ASKED “When did the destiny islands fall to darkness?” AND THEN HOW RIKU SMILED AND SAID “Aqua, you’re in the realm of light.” LIKE. I CRIed ACTUAL TEARS??? So I was wondering if you could do headcanons for how the water baes (Aqua and Demyx) react after seeing their s/o for the first time in a LONG time? Oh man, please and thank you my heart was so damn happy during that scene like you would not believe

deadass just decided to scroll into the depths of the hell that is my ask box and found THIS gem so lets go gamers

Pretend Demyx’s part happens right after KH3 when he like runs off to meet you or something - and also that Aqua’s part happens right after she’s free from the realm of darkness. yknow, for more sad effects 

Demyx :

Demyx can be rather clingy when it comes to people he trusts, given how rare those are when you work for such a shady group of dudes with silver hair who are planning to summon a really big heart on the sky. And even with how forgetful he can be, you never left his mind. Not for one second. The thought of you is more than enough to make his heart flutter - so when he finally has the chance to run, run away and look for you, he doesn’t even stop to think twice. (bro look at me adding tWO KH references into this)

However, on his way to you, Demyx might start to doubt himself for the first time since he became a Nobody - he always assumed you’d wait for him, that you’ll welcome him with open arms. But what if that wasn’t the case ? Had you moved on ? Should he move on as well ? Excitement turns into anxiety as he passes by all of these familiar streets, all the places he’s visited with you, of all the memories he holds dear. After all these years, would you remember him ? Were you EVEN in this world anymore ? 

His heart stops when he spots you by chance among the crowd - and his fears fade away when he meets your eyes, lighting up in realization. You remember him just like the day you lost him, disheveled, looking confused but overall content to just feel the sun on his face. Demyx doesn’t even realize that he’s running towards you, he doesn’t even notice that the people around have stopped to stare at the way you jump into his arms, twirling until you two end up rolling on a patch of grass. 

You’re holding each other so very close, as if challenging the universe itself to try and separate you again. As much as Demyx adores feeling your weight on top of him, laughing and crying and calling him stupid for disappearing so suddenly, he needs to see your face. He desperately needs to smother you with all of the love he had to hold back, with messy kisses all over your cheeks, on your hands, on every part he can reach. Because for once in his life, Demyx has no words and no melodies to express how happy he is to finally see you again.

Aqua :

Aqua is very patient, like. REALLY patient. So a few days without seeing you wouldn’t hurt, nor would a few weeks or a couple months. But actual years passing by without having the chance to even hear your voice, le alone know if you’re safe or doing well ? It’s torture for her. Still, she’d force herself to stay strong, deciding to look on the brighter side. 

And she’d continue to do so the next time you finally meet - but you can see it in her eyes, the way she holds back the tears and replaces them with a calm and relieved smile. You notice it in the way she holds you, committing your scent to memory, while holding you a little tighter than you’re used to. 

 Aqua knows that she should be able to cry from happiness, just like you’re doing while burying your face into her chest, nuzzling and clinging onto her. But she still believes she needs to be strong for your sake, so you can rely on her when you’re vulnerable. And yet, the second she hears your voice saying that you’ve missed and that you love her so, between sobs and sniffs - she breaks. It’s not a graceful or elegant sight, but it’s powerful like a tidal wave. 

For the first time in years, Aqua finally allows herself to cry. She trembles and her voice breaks as she steps back to look at you, arms safely secured around your shoulders, finally admitting all of the fear she felt all this time. The fear of being trapped, of not being able to see the light again - to see you and the rest of the people she loves. Aqua would cup your face between her hands, afraid that you’ll disappear if she looks away. The thing she missed the most was your smile, the one that could easily brighten up her day - the one you give her as you lean in to kiss her for the first time in so long, to reassure her that this is real. That you’re finally here, with her.