#kinda wish people talked about ocd as much as they talk about autism

[ffelii]

Clicking on the "actually obsessive" tag and seeing "yanderecore" shit instead of OCD awareness or whatever else I would've expected kinda sucked lol

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

5. What do you wish more people knew about autism?

10. What are your most common stims?

11. If you could give any advice to your younger self, what would it be?

36. Do you have routines that you have to follow? What's in your routine?

49. What's something you find hard to do because of autism?

thanks for the ask!!

5. What do you wish more people knew about autism?

jensen wishes more people understood that autism does not equal incompetent. like the infantilization around autism is so horrible and especially as someone who was diagnosed much later than most, he absolutely saw the difference in how people treated him. there were def coworkers (MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS MIND YOU) that suddenly acted like he needed things done for him when like. he doesnt. hes still the same person and can do as much as he did before but suddenly people are acting like he needs his hand held the whole way and, in his case, he does not. yes there are other types of support that are helpful, but assuming he can't do things is not

10. What are your most common stims?

jensen is the worst leg bouncer you will ever meet. he also rocks back and forth a lot, more at home though, and he has some little spinning rings he plays with. but the leg bouncing is the most constant one. i say "worst" bc, while the leg bouncing itself is whatever, hes really aggressive ab it?? like if hes passenger while bryce is driving literally the entire car will shake. in the spinny chairs at work he will have to keep pulling himself back to the table bc he just slowly pushes it away w how hard he is bouncing his leg

besides that though this is also one where his ocd can come into the mix. like some of his stims go with/are his compulsions so its not always the best esp when he does a stim w one hand/leg, so then he has to do it w the other

11. If you could give any advice to your younger self, what would it be?

to stop trying to please people. jensen was never really a people pleaser, per se, but there were certain people he tried to do the most for that would never appreciate or accept it (namely his mom). its part of the reason why he masks so much and more importantly so well bc he tried to take any "weird" or "annoying" part of him and get rid of it so as not to be a burden

36. Do you have routines that you have to follow? What's in your routine?

jensen is a very intense scheduler bc he knows if he doesnt do it nothing will get done. there are a lot of little routines he follows but those are also ocd related, so its hard to say where the line is. but generally he keeps a consistent schedule and likes to have things planned bc it keeps him on top of everything he has to do. when he gets behind it can be rough bc he'll just kinda stop doing Everything

49. What's something you find hard to do because of autism?

jensen can definitely have struggles w certain patients. he is not the most social person, but i think canon mc having a love for hearing peoples' stories is something jensen still reflects. while he is not the best conversationalist, he is the best listener (thats why he and bryce work so well honestly). he loves listening to people talk ab their experiences, but when it comes to back and forth conversation, thats where he struggles. eye contact is a huge one for him bc it is just the most uncomfortable thing in the whole world and trying to find the right response to everything is not the easiest for him. to most peoples' surprise, he actually loves the chatty patients bc, not only can he diagnose them quicker, but its just 1000 times easier for him

[bayouette]

Maybe because I’m #enlightened because I have two close relatives with higher needs/intellectual disability autism, but some people want to “cure autism” as a beneficial thing for their children so they can live “full” lives and not for eugenics shit (disabled people pollute the blood line) right? Growing up I wanted to study neuroscience to cure autism because it affected (so called “took energy out of”) the women in my life so much. All of us are aware that my cousin is alive and deserves to be alive and is able to love and have likes and dislikes and we love him so much we would do anything for them you still have to recognize that he will never have a “normal life”. Possibly a “bad life” because of it. And it’s kinda like oh that’s why autism is a disability.

So that’s why even though I am a “#gtkidburnout kid who turned out to be high masking autistic” I recognize that I am the minority with what is actually autism. Many times I think I am more OCD or anxious than having high sensory over loud (which I do) or having trouble communicating (which I do, but I can hold a professional conversion in so called “masking” even though it pains me to look them in the face and I’m sweating and wishing to kill myself”. My uncle or cousin could never do anything other than simple or physical or “disciplinary’ (don’t run away from me don’t run into the street please youre my baby im scared you might die or get taken advantage love I’m so tired I loved you more than I love my anxious maybe sub-clinical daughters but maybe just a little anxious and antisocial, if you’re beautiful soul ever got hurt before me—) therapy. Showing love in our family was taken care of them if something happened to their parents. My mom cried when I was 10 and said if anything happened to grandma I would take care of my uncle (her older brother) at any cost. My mom never ever cries. My (born during ww2) grandmas whole life was her clearly autistic (r word stupid possessed he should be put somewhere and never see his loving family again)son who was the first generation of autistic kids to get equal (special ed) education within public schools. My grandma (who was born working class first-language-Spanish) and used her smart wit with stocks so became somewhat upper middle class’s) life is of course her own, but very much donated much of it to her son who only likes a particular style of clothes and we need to hide snacks from him because he’s diabetic but we don’t know if he knows that like I’m just like stop stop we’re not supposed to talk about this if I say this I’m “ableist” against people who are billionaires won’t you just listen to me 30% of ppl with autism are intellectually disabled most of us don’t have a job (I had a 2 “jobs” first time it was a temp position that I was never called back after the first day and never officially fired me and never gave me money? And then I became an intern at a company because I told them I’m organized because I “may have autism” and then went to the mental hospital for a week after 2 months of doing one speed sheet because she wanted me to do daily meetings and I want to fucking killl myself so I had to go the hospital to get out of the internships but never tell my college or the company that it was because I was fucking neurotic anxious fucking autist.

Look oh “autism speaks is bad” isn’t because they want to cure autism. Autism is a disorder. Most people don’t like have disorders. So when they impact your day to day lives 24/7 can’t be left alone remember to close the bathroom door please say more than yes or no do you remember me I’m your niece yes it’s because he is smiling and nodding and thumping his chest I love him I’ll do anything with him I could never have a conversation about lord of the rings like with my other uncle who may have been a diagnosed with “a little bit of the autism” if he was a tween today to someone who you love like a son a precious baby son who sometimes does tricks that’s shows that he loves us (do you want to hug me? No? Come on I’m your aunt?? Aw, okay, oh, OHE HE GAVE ME A KISS!! OH BUESO BUESO BUESO MY LOVE MY DARLING” (I CANT BE AUTISTIC BECAUSE I FORCED DOWN MY DESIRE TO HURL EVERYTIME SOME HUGGED ME “please don’t hurt me where do I put my arms you’re smelly you’re kinda creepy is this what uncles do??? Mexicans are just more touchy I watched too much law and order to feel something to explain why I felt so alone and in grief and in rage I tour up my leather chair I need to bleed so that explains someone must have molested this is why because normal people don’t fucking feel this way!!!!! When they touch their uncles????? WHAT HAPPENED TO ME??”

Autism speaks sucks because it endorses autism as a death sentence. “I want to kill my ‘heavily autistic’ daughter because she’s violent and dangerous to her other siblings and I’m so tired and my misogynistic husband doesn’t love me anymore let’s just go to heaven and meet Christ heaven anything is better than this” that IS MURDER!!! AN Autistic CHILD IS NOT A FUCKING ANIMAL!!! THAT GIRL IS RIGHT THERE SHE KNOWS WHATS GOING ON ITS NOT THAT THEYRE ARE STUPID THEY HAVE THOUGHTS MY UNCLE GENUINELY LOVES SEEING HIS COUSINS AND NIECES AND NEPHEWS HE LOVES ME ‘IM HAPPT (name) IS HEREE’ he types on the print-out keyboard (he technically isn’t talking (is that non-verbal selective mutism TikTok) because my 4’11 mid 80s grandma is guiding him with her beautiful old wrinkled calloused veiny beautiful could stare all at day I could paint that and be put in a museum fingers) and he can’t do it on his own. But I love him like a fucking human not a fucking lamb to be slaughtered!!! I refuse to have my uncle or cousin of Isaac!!!!!!! They are not damned!!! We are weird and I’m the least weird but I’m fine I keep in my grimace mom mom you have no friends mom That’s NOT NORMAL Mommy.

But my cousin from my dad’s side just got diagnosed over the computer with AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDER and she cried out in glee!! ‘Finally!!! I’m in the special club!!! That’s why I’m so QURIKY IM SO ALONE!! Hehehe.’ And she said ‘oh your maternal uncle must have been hidden inside’ ARE YOU ISNANE??? MY GRANDMOTHER WOULD KILL HERSELF TO SAVE HER AUTISTIC SON. SHE WAS ONE OF THE FIRST IN FUCKING THE USA TO DEMEND EQUAL TREATMENT (WITHOUT LABOTOMIES WITHOUT EUGENICS) FOR HER YOUNG BOY ONE OF THE FIRST IN OUR COUNTY THEY SAID SHE WAS A BAD MOM THAT IT WAS ALL HER FAULT R WORD DEMON SPAWN YOU KNOW THE SPARTANS KICKED CRIPPS OFF THEIR CLIFFS WHEN THEYRE BABIES TOO BAD THEY DONT HAVE THAT NOW!!

YOU KNOW NOTHING BESIDES TUMBLR! YOU DO NOT TRUST YOUR ELDERS (many queers are autistic?)!!! MY GRANDMA MY MOM MY AUNT MY UNCLE MY COUSIN MY SISTER MY DAD ARE THE ELDERS DIPSHIT!!!! SOME OF THE PEOPLE ABOVE ARE THE somewhat NEUROTIC ANTISOCIAL NOBODY TALKS FOR THIRTY YEARS BUTS THATS NORMAL. — BUT THEY SPEAK FOR THE ONES WHO CANNOT SPEAK!!! WHICH IS A LARGE FRACTION OF AUTISTIC PEOPLE!! WHICH IS WHY ITS CALLED AUTISM SPEAKS DUMBASSS!!!!!!!!!!! DUMBAESSSS!!!!

I WISH I WAS FUCKING NORMAL AND IM NOT ABELIST FOR WISHING THAT. I WENT TO FOUR HIGH SCHOOLS. IM MAYBE GOING TO MY THRID COLLEGE AND IM A SOPHMORE STILL.I HAVE TWO FRIENDS!!! IM 20 and HAVE NEVER BEEN ON A DATE!!! NOT TALKING ABOUT GREEK MYTHOLOGY??? SHUT UP SHUT UP LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THE LAYERS OF TROY OH WHAT ABOUT SIGNING UP FOR CLASSES? NO IM SCARED IM SO SCARED WHAT IF THEY SEE IM NOT NORMAL IM A FREAK IM MONSTER IM A BAD PERSON!!! I WISH I WAS MORE AUTISTIC SO PEOPLE WOULD BELIEVE ME!!!! I’m not gonna make it past 25!!! I have been near bed ridden for 5 months ish.

In the end I made it about me..:… I’ve been depressed/anxious for what’s seems like my whole life I went through diaries that said I never was a child because I was so careful and scared and neurotic and shy and please don’t scream at me please don’t touch me!!….. and I wished I was like my cousin who is “level 2” who they asked if it was okay to touch. But they never asked me… it wasn’t until I started questioning our fundamental autistic anxious antisocial please don’t be estranged like that one uncle and said “oh my good I think I’m autistic” that people went softer. Only a handshake. A wave. Didn’t chase me down to demand a goodbye hug. Then I got my diagnosis (which comes with its own sense of grief) and it’s like “:))) it’s okay”” and it’s like finally finally!!!! You understand!! I love you but I don’t know you!!!! Why do you love me??? I’m so hopeless!!!!

Goddd I’m making it ABOUT ME AGAIN!!!!

I’m sorry to all autistics. Autism does not make us monkeys or dogs or demons or freaks or deserved to be choked in their crib we are human beings!!!! And I love my uncle and cousin and my family so much but I can’t talk to them I’m so scared.

And you can make the best of it! You can say, “oh because of my autism I’m really into aquariums!!!” And get special interest energy (respect) and be really passionate about your job as a marine biologist and you’re super organized as a person you are a technology whiz!!! You devote all your time to work and aquariums (and maybe some other special interests like anime figures that make her literally squeal) instead of hanging out with family or friends or coworkers or potential partners because you’re so odd and hahahaha sorry I actually have a headache yeah I can go to that company party but really you’re just so scared you’ll say the wrong thing). But you live with it. You don’t need much affection or attention—but sometimes from the right couple people it feels nice. And you don’t like many people anyway, few ‘get you’ And you may be happy like this. You never get married. Sometimes people talk to you like a baby but you never get why. You know the most about random details that come in handy sometimes. People trust you but aren’t necessarily affectionate towards you. And you have your parents who are cool and siblings that are okay and a couple friends who really ‘get’ you and you be happy. You may love being autistic.

It’s a spectrum, remember? I wish my uncle and cousin were happy and full. I want to be functional and half-way normal. I want every kid who thought they were a secret alien who didn’t know when to look into peoples eyes to be acknowledged and be told ‘ you are not normal but that in no way means you cannot be happy.’ And I wish special ed had more funding. You can make an argument that gifted is special ed whatever but it in should no way get more money than special ed.

I

[henryclaremontdiaz]

i may have impulsively (and kinda drunkenly) bought a ticket to alabama comic con and a photo op with carlisle and emmett from twilight.

my inner 13 year old me is healing. 13 year old 2008 year old autumn is crying thinking about meeting anyone from twilight, 15 years after the movie came out and 15 years after i first learned about it. 15 years after the hyperfixation, 15 years after it influenced me to start writing, a hobby and passion i still have to this day.

15 years later and im sitting here, trying to plan the cringiest, funniest twilight related outfit i can find for the photo op even if i plan to possibly do a cosplay the other parts of the day and crying a little and smiling a lot because fuck it, what's the point of having a grown up job with grown up money (even if this will make you kinda broke) if you can't make yourself happy and heal the child inside of you that was so in love with twilight but hurting so bad, spending class time filling pages with book quotes to put in the front of your binder and daydreaming about the twilight universe but also crying after school and self harming any change you had.

i wish i could go back to her, to tell her it was all okay. that it was okay to be hurting, you were going through so much. that even though you didnt even know it was possible, you're not just attracted to boys, and that you're not even fully a girl. that you had gone through so much trauma already in your short 13 years and there was more to come, but that in the end it's okay.

you get to become a grownup, even if in the years following this you thought you'd never make it this far. you get to have your own apartment and a teaching job (yes you still wanted to be a teacher, just a different subject) and two cats of your own. you have all these online friends (yes you're still making online friends, that wasn't just a one off thing in the new moon movie chatroom - though that did change your life even if you don't talk to those people anymore) and you've even gotten to meet some of them in real life and your family accepts that and encourages it.

things aren't always great, but you know now. you know that you have depression, anxiety, and ocd. professionals even believe that you do. it explains so much. you've also learned about autism and that it runs on your maternal side of your family officially (along with some other suspicions), and that it explains a lot too about yourself.

everything that happened then at 13, and before then, and after then, lead to this moment.

and despite it all, things are okay.

[anyawarrior]

An Intro Post I guess (PLEASE READ THIS IF YOU'RE NEW AND/OR HAVEN'T READ IT BEFORE)

I've seen a few mutuals of mine do this sort of thing so I might as well.

I'll get the DNI stuff out of the way immediately. Don't interact with me if you're a pedophile/MAP, queerphobe, TERF, zoophile, necrophile, racist, sexist, ableist, etc, or if you support any of those kinds of people. Also if you're mainly involved in discourse I would prefer if you didn't bring that here.

Also if you don't like me using the word queer for myself or as a general umbrella term you can suck it, I'm tired of discourse and I don't want it here. I am also very inclusionist and will not hesitate to defend "controversial" identities that are only that way because of queerphobes, TERFs, or trolls.

Another thing: I AM A MINOR!!!! NSFW IS A BIG NO-NO HERE!!!!!! IT MAKES ME UNCOMFY AND IT'S JUST PLAIN WEIRD!!!!!!!!! DON'T FOLLOW ME IF THAT'S THE MAIN OR ONLY FOCUS OF YOUR BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!!! Relating to this: if you're a Full Adult (which basically means over 25) you can interact but just don't be weird. If you act kind of weird but just don't understand that's okay but like you're on thin ice.

I will not stand for any sort of toxicity on this blog, directed at myself or others. If I or someone else enjoy something you don't and you don't like that, deal with it. If I or someone else don't enjoy shipping and you don't like that, deal with it. People are allowed to have their own interests and things they enjoy, independent of you.

Intro continues under the "keep reading" (intro, hyperfixations, tags, that kinda jazz)

And now, with all of that out of the way...

Hey, I'm Anya, but Chalky's another nickname of mine. I'm neurodivergent in several ways (autism, ADHD, OCD). I'm a bisexual non-binary genderfluid genderqueer who uses she/they pronouns (I have many a pronoun crisis but she/they always stay consistent). I'm also grayrose, which means I'm graysexual and grayromantic but not grayaroace. I'm also sex-ambivalent and romance-ambivalent. And polyamorous (but not looking for a relationship of any sort rn, I'm just putting it here for self-acceptance reasons). The ironic part about all of that attraction stuff is NONE OF IT SYNCS UP-

My goal in life is mainly to become a therapist, as my struggles alongside my friends' struggles have ignited a will to help others that's blazing brightly to this day. Alongside that, I do writing as a hobby (poetry, songwriting, etc) and sometimes draw. I enjoy singing, but I have extreme confidence issues involving my voice, such as volume, tone, etc.

I have plenty of hyperfixations, feel free to ask me about them using the ask feature! Even if it's not a currently active hyperfixation, I'm absolutely willing to talk about it. My hyperfixations/interests include:

Pokemon, Demon Slayer, Stardew Valley, Minecraft, Slime Rancher, JJBA, Terraria, Celeste, Ace Attorney, A Hat In Time, Gravity Ghost, Undertale/Deltarune, Vocaloid/Utauloid, BWW, Rhythm Heaven, Kirby. I'm also getting into MHA.

Please note that some of these are not as active as they once were and some of them I don't even know much about. I am in no way affiliated with the toxic parts of any of these fandoms and do not wish to become affiliated with those. If you're going to try and start up conversation about these topics, adhere to the rules at the start of this post, please and thank you.

Oh, one other thing! The one thing that's always active in my mind is my writing! Check out my sideblog @anyaswriting if you wanna learn about it! I'm only just getting started on jotting things down but please ask about my characters I am DYING to share them!!!!!

Onto the tags! I will try to tag my posts with certain tags to indicate what they are.

"#important" is for, well, important things. "#please read" is for things that I find urgent or important enough that I want people to read them rather than just scroll past. "#urgent" is the highest level of importance.

"#antics" is for general chaos, whether it be me with my friends or just something fun or funny. There may be other tags put in front of it to indicate what kind of antics, such as it just being me ("#personal antics") or mutuals ("#mutual antics").

"#personal" is for things mainly relating to me, whether that be things currently going on in my life that are weird or that I feel a need to talk about. This can range from something dumb that happened that was funny to me announcing that there may be a change in content due to something happening in my life.

"#friends" is for things that relate to my closer friends. I will always try to remember to block out their usernames and profile pictures to respect their privacy, and that is final.

"#mutuals" is for things relating to mutuals, like ask games. Also conversations with them.

"#reblog" is for, well... it's self-explanatory. Same with "#long post".

"#vent" will be on my vent posts, the one rule there is don't laugh at or attack me for venting here, as I rarely ever do that anyway.

"#serious" is for posts that don't have many or any at all punchlines and cover matters that I felt a need to weigh in on. If it's a reblog, I either won't say something or I'll just put notes in the tags.

"#hyperfixation" is going to be for posts talking about things that I'm hyperfixating on and things like that. "#writing" will be similar but it'll mainly be about my writing that I've been trying to keep off of this blog (but if you manage to hit the VERY VERY BEGINNING of the blog you'll see some of it get mentioned!!)

"#positivity" will be for positivity posts, encouragement, etc. Usually in the form of reblogs, but might end up trying to do that myself hehe. "#support" is a bit of a subcategory of this.

"#misc" will be for anything that does not fit into these tags.

"#Anya's Adventures with Gender" is for some of my antics involving gender such as gender envy, dysphoria, realizations, and more. Won't be put under the "antics" tag usually.

"#conversation" will be used for reblog chains and the like that are ongoing conversations, since just using "#reblog" again and again feels weird and it'll just be redundant. Also used for posts where I'm more of giving input instead of just reblogging and throwing out a one-off comment.

"#out of touch thursday" is, well... out of touch thursday. I will reblog a post with this tag every Thursday (or well used to, but if it shows up I will).

"#shitpost" is just, well, shitposts lmao.

There may be dumb little things I drop in the tags, so always check if there are any weirdly long ones, as those are probably weird notes I put in.

I will always attempt to tag things with the correct trigger warnings, please let me know if there is something I should add. Do note that my older posts will likely not have any of the above tags, as I didn't realize people had tagging systems, and I just kind of went for it.

I'm sorry if I ever end up misinterpreting something or saying something wrong or hurtful, the most likely reason is I just didn't know that what I said or did was wrong. I'm still learning, and still trying my best! My heart is always in the right place!

I will always consider my blog as a safe space for all kinds of people, just don't be a mean person and I'm sure things will turn out great.

That concludes my intro post! Stay safe, stay healthy, stay hydrated, and stay awesome! (god, that was cheesy...)

Cya!

-Anya

Edit like 5 seconds after I posted this: I FORGOT THE LINK TO MY PREVIOUS PINNED POST WAHEAHFSADF HANG ON ONE MOMENT I'LL GET IT https://anyawarrior.tumblr.com/post/657551796217217024/a-very-sudden-post-made-out-of-a-spurt-of-anxiety

Extra note: This post gets edited every so often! It includes new tags added to the tagging system and changes some details so that they're up-to-date. If it's been a while since you read it, go ahead and read it again! The DNI and such will likely stay the same, but my hyperfixations list sometimes gets new stuff added to it, so that could be good conversation.

[randomfandomimagine]

Hello, hello~! How are you? I’ve withheld from requesting a fandom ship because I was afraid it’d burden you, but I guess I’ll send one in! Of course, you have every right to refuse this ^^

Could I request a 💌 ship please for ffvii, ffxv, loz, Harry Potter, fantastic beasts, and death note?

I’m a bi fem with thick dark brown hair that has a natural blonde streak. I have grey/blue eyes and I’m really pale with freckles.

I’m an introvert but when I feel comfortable I can talk a lot. I’m pretty timid but I’m also fiery, passionate, and hotheaded and will debate my opinions and beliefs until the end even if I know better.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, autism, ocd, anxiety, and depression and those things can prove to be a big obstacle in my everyday life but I try to keep pushing along even though I have a lot of days where I just don’t see myself getting anywhere.

I have a tendency to wanna carry the weight of the world on my shoulders and fuss over everyone but myself, I beat myself up of the little things but at the same time I’m kinda prideful? I’d definitely consider myself compassionate.

I’m the therapist friend. I want to solve everyone’s problems but I have a really hard time with taking my own advice. I tend to feel really guilty and uncomfortable and selfish and whiny when talking about my negative feelings so I just stay silent.

There’s two things I hate more than anything in this world: Feeling vulnerable/exposed and feeling caged/tied down. I value freedom and privacy and the ability to adapt.

I’d consider myself smart! I really enjoy history, reading, writing, science, forensics, video games, true crime, conspiracies, anime, kpop, medical studies, Greek mythology, etc.

I’m religious but I prefer to stay open minded and I would never ever push my beliefs on anyone! I honestly wish that people could be kind to one another and love each other for who they are.

That being said, I store a lot of anger because society and the world makes me furious and I can’t do anything about it. I really like my voice being heard and because I feel like I’m in a place where everyone’s deaf to my screaming, it causes a lot of spite...

I’m a beta. I like having a position of power while also having someone to lean on for guidance. I’m an INFJ-T, Ravenclaw, a type #5 enneagram with a wing 4, growth 8, and stress 7 (sage, originalist, challenger, enthusiast), Athena kid, and Leo.

I appreciate your blog so, so much and you obviously have every right to deny this! Please just stay safe and healthy and happy, okay? <33

I ship you with Cloud, Gladio, Zelda, Harry, Credence and L!

◼ SHIPS ARE NOW CLOSED ◼

💖 CLOUD STRIFE

💖 GLADIOLUS AMICITIA

💖 ZELDA

💖 HARRY POTTER

💖 CREDENCE BAREBONE

💖 L LAWLIET

[pokerbrookie]

My "coming out" post about my mental illness

I am writing this with much reluctance since I've only hinted at my life with mental illnesses in shared posts and quotes etc. Until right now I've never “come out” and declared my battle throughout my life fighting mental illnesses. I'm sorry to those of you I may embarrass by sharing my story but it's time…. It time for me to share my story, it's time to let the world know, it's time for me to fight the stigma I so hate but have felt my entire life. As I'm sure many have deduced I fight with anxiety, but not just any anxiety. Crippling life stopping anxiety. I am diagnosed using the DSM-V as bipolar type 2, agoraphobic, and OCD (NO THIS IS NOT BECAUSE I LIKE THINGS NEAT FFS). My secondary diagnoses are social anxiety (yes even people who seem extroverted can have social anxiety) and a few others. I was first in therapy at 11 years old and I was hospitalized in 1993 at the age of 13 for the first time. So yea this has been life long battle and years of different diagnoses, different programs, hospitals, shirks, therapists, medications, self medicating and on and on. I won't bore you all with my life story but I will tell you my most recent experience (If anyone is so inclined I will happily share the whole story). My most recent attempt at mental wellness started in 2014ish it was 2 years after my grandma died and those 2 years were my most sickest in my life. I was in a dark place, I wouldn't leave the house and barely the bed, I let people take advantage of me and sadly in turn take advantage of my mother. I was legit crazy nuts, I'm talking down the rabbit hole with no light at the bottom. I was one of the people you see in movies all paranoid and such. You know the ones I'm talking about, the people you feel for but don't think you know anyone that severe. Well guess what you do, at least one (if not more closet cases), you know me. I AM A ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE YOU KINDA FEEL FOR BUT MAKE UNCOMFORTABLE WHEN YOU SEE THEM IN ENTERTAINMENT OR IN YOUR DAILY LIFE. I just hide it by isolating and acting all extroverted and funny when I'm around people. But when I'm sick inside I'm dying, all I want to do is go home and my mind races with a million thoughts, one being “I want to go home” over and over” I'm more than happy to elaborate on how my mind works if you are interested. But for now I'll stick to my work these last 3.5 years. I was put into a “partial care program” also known as partial hospitalization by my family's insistence. I was so sick I couldn't even make the the phone call, my sister called for me, my mom took me to the intake and I started the program immediately due to my severe state at the time. The program is intensive group therapy 6 hours a day 1-5 days a week depending on the client (yes we are called clients or consumers NOT patients, personally I think it's silly but if makes other people feel better then why not, I'm fine with patient myself). There are 5-6 groups a day each a different “topic” for example meditation, relapse prevention, humor therapy, WRAP (wellness recovery action plan) and so on. There are also groups called units which is where you work in the kitchen, thrift store, clerical and newsletter. I tended to not do well in the units so stuck mainly to groups. I did this for 3 years and was released into just individual therapy in January but my therapist thinks I need to go back 1-2 days for more structure… Let me say that instead of looking at this as a bad thing I have come so far in my recovery that I can see why and accept it. In the last 3.5 years I came from not leaving my house to having a part time job I love, friendships I can keep up with, and am able to recognize what I do need help-wise. Yes I live with my mom. It took until literally 2 months ago for me to accept that I am still unable to live alone successfully and that I need the help of my mom and step-dad. And you know what, it's ok. To everyone who puts down people for living with their family realize there is usually a good reason. No I don't have a full time job, no I don't have my own place, no Im not married, I don't have kids but you know what I'm ok with that. I'm actually happier than I have been that I can remember. Recently I was at an event where someone made a comment about how “terrible” my life was being on disability and delivering pizzas and it bothered me at the time and still does but now it bothers me that there are people out there who judge others that way. My life isn't terrible it's wonderful. I have family and friends who love me and I'm working on myself… that's not terrible, that's life, it's my life so now thinking back at that moment I wish I said fuck off to him, but alas my social anxiety caught in my brain and I don't even remember my reply. It's because of this guy, some posts I see on FB putting down people who can't work, and because it's time I do my part to end the stigma of mental illness that I write this post. So I beg of any of you still reading please before you judge someone or something you don't understand ask about it. Research it. Find out reasons before you look down on anyone. They may be like me, severely mentally ill so much so that it has affected my ENTIRE life. Living with it is hard but it's possible. As a side note to this post I refer to the people that attend these programs and the mentally ill in general as the “Forgotten People” we do so much for homelessness, autism, cancer you name it we help but with mental illness we turn away because it makes “normal” people uncomfortable. I bet you that in 90% of people's neighborhoods there is a group home that you don't even know about housing the mentally ill not lucky enough to have family support. There are tons of programs in every county like mine… We are all around you, you just don't realize it. We may be bat shit crazy but we are humans and awesome ones at that! If you're still reading thank you, if you have questions please ask, if you want resources tell me I'll help, please just don't forget about me because I don't go to every event or because I'm not “normal”

[meanwhileinoz]

10+ Misconceptions About Mental Illness Need To Be Cleared Up Right Now

Mental illness is a myriad of conditions that appear in different ways. Moreover, because of the constant misinterpretation of mental illness on social media. Mental illness is often misunderstood.

Therefore, to inspire a more positive discussion on mental illness, here are a few anecdotes to clarify the confusion:

Depression comes with a mask.

I have depression. People don’t believe me because I appear outgoing and gregarious in social situations, but it’s just a large coping mechanism and something I need to do in many cases for client meetings and gatherings and such.

It’s exhausting. I’m drained and many times feel horrible afterward. I wish people knew that just because you appear happy or content on the outside, you can still be the opposite on the inside. Many people with depression go to great lengths to disguise or mask it, which makes it all the more difficult for others to see that there’s something wrong.

– ldn6

The intricacies of Mental health.

Mental Health is a spectrum. It’s extremely unlikely that any one person is 100% Mentally Healthy, and it’s unlikely that they’re the opposite. The  U.S. Department of Health and Human Services estimates only about 17% of adults are in a state of “optimal” mental health.

Just because you may have an issue though, doesn’t mean that you’re spiraling and unhealthy. Much like a physical health issue, a single episode isn’t the end of the world. – (Source)

Dispelling the ADHD myth.

ADHD; it DOES exist, and it’s not just about looking at squirrels outside the window.

And we’re not just seeking stimulants. Many of us hate taking medication because it makes us into zombies that can barely function and choose to deal with the symptoms of the condition rather than take Adderall or any other pills. – willflungpoo & Ketrel

Bipolar disorder needs to be understood better.

Usually when you say ‘I’m bipolar’, you get odd responses from either a) the people that think you are this rabid psycho bouncing off the walls one second and is dangerously suicidal literally the next second or b) the people who think “bipolar” is a normal, quirky personality trait. You know the kind: “you’re bipolar? me too! I’m so damn emotional all the time.”

I simply try to explain it to people as best as I can with a metaphor I came up with once: It’s not a balanced, steady rollercoaster of emotions, that most people experience and enjoy. It’s also not a rollercoaster that does 60 loops in a row, derails and explodes onto the ground below. it’s more of a rollercoaster that goes too high up with a bit too much energy and then gives everybody really bad whiplash when they drop to the bottom of the ride over and over until it’s too much.

The metaphor is kinda dumb at not completely accurate, but it just helps people understand better.

– zapsquad

Mental health and crime do not correlate.

Some people have an inherit fear of others who suffer from a Mental Illness. The media over-sensationalizes the effects of Mental Illness to a point where it seems that crimes are only committed by people who suffer from it.

This is completely untrue, as the American Psychological Association found that only 7.5% of crimes are directly related to Mental Illness.

– (Source)

Depression is not an illusion.

Depression.

“But you don’t have anything to be depressed about, sweetie.”

That’s like saying, ‘But you can’t have asthma! This room is full of air!’

– kernunnos77 & eeyore102

The importance of decreasing stigma.

Mental Health affects everyone. Research estimates that 1 in 5 people experience mental illness in their lives. So even if you aren’t suffering from it, someone you know might be suffering.

This is why it’s so important to decrease a stigma about Mental Health and open up a conversation about it. Everyone will experience the effects of it and the more we are able to understand and communicate about it, the more positive our relationships can be.

– (Source)

Psychologists are really trained professionals.

On the heels of that, it’s important to talk to a medical professional about your mental health instead of just your close family and friends.

Treating Mental Health takes more than just ‘Talking and Listening’ and the techniques that Psychologists use are developed through years of education and training to positively impact their patients.

– (Source)

I think you deserve that rest.

I have severe anxiety. So much so it’s developed into agoraphobia. I stay in my apartment most days, and only really go outside in public accompanied by my safe person. The common misconception is that I’m lazy. I don’t have a life. Because I stay inside all day, most days, and I’m content not leaving. But I do a lot. I draw, I’m learning how to sew, and I try to get out a little more every day but it’s baby steps.

People also think I’m lazy because I sleep a lot. I have regular panic attacks. At least 3 times a day. It’s rather exhausting. My brain feels like it needs rest after having one.

– MetalMaiden420

Misconceptions about Anorexia.

I have anorexia. I think the most common misconception is that it is about being thin. I have honestly never met a person who developed an eating disorder because they wanted to look like some photoshopped model. For us, it’s about perfection and control, it just so happens that thinness is a trait that our society admires, which is why we strive to achieve it. At a certain point, you are intellectually aware that you are not attractive and dying, but this irrational little part of your brain won’t let you eat because you’re still too big. There is no such thing as “small enough”, once the disease takes hold no amount of weight loss can satisfy.

– purpleelephant77

Seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness.

For some reason, even with this debilitating stigma that people dealing with Mental Illness face, it’s still seen as weak to look that in the face and say: “I’m going to go to a therapist anyways”. That doesn’t make sense at all.

But for people with Mental Health issues, opening up emotionally is a very trying experience. That’s exactly what happens in therapy, you open up your emotions and face your mind at its worst.

How could that be seen as weak? – (Source)

Yeah, just stop thinking like that.

OCD isn’t about being organized and anal. It can be overwhelming and paralyzing at it’s worst and telling us to “just not have those thoughts” isn’t helpful.

– mycatisawh***

Another great analogy for anxiety.

Anxiety is that unwelcome, creepy stranger at a party that won’t leave you alone.

One thing people don’t get is how debilitating mental illness can be. With anxiety, it isn’t simply just worrying too much about a deadline…that’s stress. Stress is good. Anxiety is bad. Anxiety starts with automatic thoughts that ruminate into something bigger. It’s worrying about things out of your control. I’ve been told more times than I can count to “just quit worrying so much.” I don’t think people realize how much effort I have to put in to getting myself into healthy thought patterns. It is a daily battle to fight off thoughts like “everyone hates me” and “you’ll never amount to anything”, and not let them ruminate to the point where I cancel my day and crawl back into bed. – frazzled_wumbologist

When people think your illness doesn’t even exist.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Easiest way to explain it is that I’m so good at compartmentalizing, the compartments can’t all access each other (work-me can’t access school-me can’t access home-me). And since people are kind of the sum of their experiences, my different ‘mes’ seem different from one another.

Did you know DID affects from 1-5% of the population? That’s the same as depression, schizophrenia, and a host of better know physical illnesses. Did you know that doctors trained in trauma only find the CATALYST for DID to be controversial? In other words, they know it exists, they just don’t know why only some child abuse survivors end up with it. Most people think the existence of DID is controversial when it really isn’t anymore.

And the really bad part is, abuse is always denied, always minimized. To come out from that scarred, with a mental disorder that was, in essence, thrust upon you by others when you were too young to resist, and to then be denied or minimized….there is a reason only my spouse and my therapist know I have this disorder.

– ThrowawayDIDhardenuf

Maybe people are actually sick?

People who really are suffering from a Mental Illness aren’t faking it for the medication. I can’t understand why this is such a permeating thought. Mental Illness is such a debilitating condition and the stigma is so overbearing that it would be completely undesirable to fake it.

These are real medical conditions that are treated by real medicine and real doctors. Ignoring a broken foot and continuing to walk on it won’t let it heal

– (Source)

Misconceptions about Borderline Personality Disorder.

Borderline personality disorder does not mean I am an axe-wielding homicidal bunny boiling stalker. Never have been.

Therapy helped massively with my emotion regulation and crisis management skills. Also suffer from depression, so life is a constant juggling act and some days are better than others. I’ve been mean, manipulative and suicidal and I self-harmed. The guilt of the way I acted is what usually drives the depression. Many people make the assumption that all borderliners are evil, usually because of bad experiences.

There are bad people with BPD. But there are also good people who want to change their lives for the better.

– Welshgirlie2

Clearing up more misconceptions about OCD.

I have autism & OCD and as soon as people find out, they start making Sheldon Cooper jokes and asking if my pencils not being aligned perfectly on my desk makes me freak out. OCD does not universally equal being a neat-freak, and autism does not universally equal being a socially stunted outcast.

My desk is a disaster and I can function fine in most social settings, but I can’t drink out of a cup without rinsing it out first(even if it just came out of the dishwasher), I pick my bottom lip till it bleeds, I can’t look people in the eye, I add up number sequences(like totals on receipts) till I’m left with a single digit number and if the number isn’t “good” I get uneasy, and I have horrifying intrusive thoughts that replay in my head for sometimes weeks at a time.

The autism isn’t so bad, but the OCD is really bad. It sucks and I wish I didn’t have it.

– Lydious

No one is immune.

Children can suffer from Mental Health problems too. It’s also not just a product of a bad childhood experience or a bad parent. These things just happen to everyday people.

In the UK, 1 in 5 children have been diagnosed with a Mental Health problem, and 1 in 20 teenagers suffer from depression specifically.

– (Source)

A personal account of the stigma people face.

High Functioning schizophrenic. Being close to 40, I’ve lived with the stigma of not being able to be trusted, that it’s just an overactive imagination & that I have more than one person living inside of me since I was a teenager. But mostly it’s the overactive imagination one that really bothers me.

– iwsnvrhr

Stop saying this please.

Having suffered from both Anxiety and Depression, many times I’ve been told to just “snap out of it”, which obviously isn’t possible. I’m not sure people always realize how debilitating these illnesses can be for people.

– Anonymous

Maybe don’t judge people by their medical history?

People with Mental Health concerns can absolutely hold a job. Like we mentioned before, these people aren’t violent or constantly having manic episodes.

In fact, studies have shown that employees with Mental Health issues are just as punctual, motivated, and work at a level on par with or greater than other employees.

Misconceptions about Tourettes.

It really drives me nuts when I say I have Tourettes to someone and they immediately let out a string of swear words.

Yeah no. If you told me you had alcoholism, my immediate reaction wouldn’t be swaying back and forth and slurring my words. Thanks for belittling my issues.

I wish there was more awareness about Tourette’s outside of the Hollywood version of it. It sucks living with constantly twitching, but it sucks telling someone you have it and having them think you have a hilarious malady and making a joke about it. I’m easy going, but for some reason, that really gets under my skin.

– my_Favorite_post

Although, there are some terrible people out there.

PTSD is something that stole certain joys away from me (shooting guns, fireworks, etc.) And it really sucks. To see people fake it and use it to get notoriety and discounts makes me sick to my stomach. I can only trust therapists or doctors with my issues. Not complete strangers.

– nessn12

We’ve been talking a lot about the debilitating effects of Mental Illness, but the truth is it’s not a life sentence. People can recover completely from their Mental Illness with the right help and medication.

Some issues aren’t curable, but they are treatable. Again, with proper medication, it’s entirely possible to live a happy and positive life.

– (Source)

You may also like

http://ift.tt/2unpMpW