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newobsessionweekly · 1 month

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Under the radar

Main masterlist | 9-1-1 masterlist

Evan "Buck" Buckley x Bradford!reader

Crossover 911 x The Rookie

Fandom: 911; The Rookie

Summary: You and Buck are happily together in a relationship kept away from your big brother, Tim. Little did you know he's going to find out in a not so pleasant way.

A/N: Crossover! I looove this. Tim would surely be an overprotective brother, looking out for his sister every step. I loved the chemistry between Tim and Angela and how they have that brother-sister kind of relationship and couldn't help myself. I love Buck too. Hope you like it and can't wait for your feedback. Thank you for your support! Lots of love, bubs! I really appreciate all of you.

Fluff | A bit of angst

Requested: no

Words: 5.4k

Warnings: Description of a pileup, unconsciousness, hurt, fire

You wake up to the sound of your alarm blaring, groaning as you roll over and squint at the bright light filtering through the curtains. Another day, another shift. You stretch, feeling the knots in your muscles protest from the previous day's exertion and made your way to the kitchen.

Tim groaned as he poured himself a cup of coffee, his expression as sour as the burnt toast sitting on the kitchen counter. "Morning," he muttered, barely sparing a glance in your direction.

You were lost in your own little world, your phone held tightly in your hand as you typed away furiously. A dreamy smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you texted Buck, your heart skipping a beat with each message exchanged.

You: Morning, sunshine

Buck: Good morning, beautiful. Did you dream of me last night?

Your feelings for Buck had blossomed gradually, like a delicate flower unfolding under the warmth of the sun. It had started innocently enough, with casual conversations and shared laughter during your shifts. But as you worked side by side, facing danger and disaster together, your bond had deepened into something more profound.

"Thank you for not ignoring me," your brother remarks sarcastically, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

You: Maybe... or maybe I dreamt of murdering Tim. Anyways I did had a good sleep.

Buck: Ouch, right in the heart! But seriously, can't wait to see you today.

Finally emerging from your daydream, you blink blearily, trying to focus on Tim's figure looming over you."Sorry," you mumbled, finally tuning into the conversation. "What were you saying?"

Tim eyed you suspiciously, his grumpiness giving way to mild annoyance. "You sleep well?" he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

You: Sameee. Just don't forget to bring coffee, or else I'll have to reconsider this whole relationship.

Buck: Yes, ma'am.

You nodded absentmindedly, a dopey smile spreading across your face as you relived your daydream. "Uh-huh," you replied, barely suppressing a yawn.

"What's with the smile, huh?" he eyes you suspiciously, his gaze lingering on your phone "Who are you texting?" he asks, his tone tinged with curiosity.

You feel a pang of guilt gnawing at your insides, knowing that if you tell Tim the truth, it could lead to a confrontation you're not ready for. But at the same time, you can't bring yourself to lie to him, not after everything you've been through together.

You found yourself drawn to Buck's magnetic charm, his unwavering dedication to his job, and his genuine kindness towards others. He had a way of making you feel safe and understood, of easing the burdens that weighed heavy on your shoulders. And as you spent more time together, you couldn't deny the growing affection that bloomed within your heart.

"Just picturing all the ways I'm gonna kill you some day," you quip, a mischievous glint in your eye.

All you can think about is Buck – his bright blue eyes that sparkled with mischief, his tousled blonde hair that fell effortlessly across his forehead, his strong, lean frame that radiated confidence and strength.

Tim rolls his eyes, but a hint of amusement flickers in his expression. "Very funny. You know, you're lucky I even let you live here rent-free."

"Yeah, yeah, remind me again why I agreed to be your roommate?" you retort, stretching lazily.

"Because you're too lazy to find your own place, that's why," Tim shoots back without missing a beat.

Your mind drifts back to Buck, his infectious laughter ringing in your ears. You can't help but smile at the thought of him, your heart fluttering at the mere mention of his name. But as Tim's voice pulls you back to reality, a pang of guilt washes over you. You know you should tell Tim about your relationship with Buck, but the fear of his disapproval holds you back.

"Lazy? Says the guy who leaves his dirty socks all over the living room," you tease, poking fun at his infamous habit.

"Hey, those socks are strategically placed as a warning to any potential intruders," Tim defends himself, a smirk playing at the corners of his lips.

"Right, because nothing scares off burglars like the smell of your sweaty feet," you counter, unable to suppress a giggle.

"You're hilarious, you know that?" Tim chuckles, shaking his head.

"Just calling it like I see it, Timmy," you reply cheekily.

"Don't call me that," Tim grumbles, though there's a trace of fondness in his voice.

"Whatever you say, Timmy," you tease, unable to resist poking fun at him.

"Ugh, you're impossible," Tim declares with mock exasperation.

"You love me, though," you say with a grin, knowing full well how much your brother cares for you.

"Yeah, yeah, don't push it," Tim replies, though there's a softness to his tone. "Well, I was actually gonna ask if you wanted to grab breakfast before we head out. There's this new place that just opened up-" he continues, but you quickly interrupt.

"Sorry, Tim, I can't. Got to get to the station early today," you interject hastily, hoping he won't press further.

"Early? Since when do you voluntarily show up early?" Tim's brow furrows in confusion.

"Since today! Gotta, uh, organize some... stuff," you lie, willing him to drop the subject before he uncovers your secret.

Tim eyes you suspiciously, but eventually shrugs, deciding not to push further. "Alright, suit yourself. Just don't forget to lock up before you leave."

"Got it," you reply, already mentally preparing yourself for the day ahead.

As Tim heads out the door, you let out a sigh of relief, grateful for the brief reprieve. But as you gather your things and make your way to the station, the weight of your secret hangs heavy on your shoulders. You know you can't keep hiding forever, but the thought of confronting Tim fills you with dread.

For now, you push aside your fears and focus on the task at hand, burying yourself in your work and trying to ignore the nagging voice in the back of your mind. But deep down, you know that sooner or later, you'll have to face the truth and find the courage to tell Tim about the man who has stolen your heart.

As the morning sun streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow over the room, you found yourself wrapped in Buck's arms, the two of you basking in the quiet intimacy of the moment. His touch was gentle against your skin, each caress igniting a spark of affection within you.

"Morning, sunshine," Buck murmured, his voice soft and filled with warmth.

You playfully nuzzled closer to him, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Hey, handsome," you replied, your heart fluttering at the sight of his endearing smile.

As Buck gazed at you, his heart swelled with a mixture of love and adoration. To him, you were a vision of beauty, your features illuminated by the soft morning light. Your eyes sparkled with warmth, reflecting the depth of your soul. He could lose himself in the depths of your gaze for hours, finding solace and comfort in the silent connection you shared.

He grinned as he handed you a steaming cup of coffee. "Here's your coffee, as promised," he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief.

"Oh! You're my hero," you teased, taking a grateful sip of the warm brew.

"Speaking of heroes," Buck said, a playful glint in his eye, "How about I save you from Tim tonight? A little date at my place. I'll get some pizza, we can continue our show. How does that sound?"

Your smile was like sunshine, lighting up the room and chasing away the darkness. It was infectious, capable of lifting his spirits even on the darkest of days. And when you laughed, it was music to his ears, a melody that echoed in his heart and filled him with joy.

You raised an eyebrow, unable to suppress a teasing grin. "Sounds like you want to save Tim," you quipped, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on his cheek. "But its perfect."

As you settled back into his embrace, enjoying the peaceful moment, Buck's fingers traced gentle patterns on your skin, sending shivers of pleasure down your spine. His touch was a soothing balm, a tangible reminder of the love and affection you shared.

It was the way you moved with grace and confidence, a silent strength that drew him to you like a moth to a flame. Your touch was gentle yet powerful, capable of soothing his soul with a single caress.

In your presence, Buck felt a sense of peace and contentment that he had never known before. You were his anchor in the storm, his rock in times of uncertainty. He cherished every moment spent with you, treasuring the memories you shared like precious gems.

But above all else, it was your love that meant the most to Buck. It was a love that transcended words, a bond that defied logic and reason. With you by his side, he felt invincible, ready to face whatever challenges life threw his way.

As he looked at you now, snuggled close in his arms, Buck couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with gratitude. And as he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, he silently vowed to cherish you, to love you with every fiber of his being, for you were the light of his life.

You cuddled together, enjoying each other's presence, while Buck took a sip of his coffee. "It's a quiet morning," he remarked, his voice laced with contentment.

"Hey there, big guy, don't jinx it," you teased, snuggling closer to him. "I won't survive another catastrophe today."

Buck chuckled, leaning in to steal another kiss. "Make me shut up, then," he murmured against your lips, his touch sending shivers of delight through your body.

Just then, Hen's voice broke through the tranquility of the moment. "Morning, love birds. You're here early."

You exchanged a sheepish glance with Buck before responding. "Just wanted some peace and quiet. Tim's been overly grumpy and asking a lot of questions lately."

Across the room, Hen busied herself with her morning routine, flashing you a knowing smile as she prepared for the day ahead. Eddie glanced up from his paperwork, curiosity evident in his expression as he listened to your conversation.

"You still didn't tell him yet?" Eddie asked, his tone gentle yet probing.

"It's none of his business," you replied firmly. "But ever since what happened to Lucy and the serial killer she met at the bar, he's been overly protective."

Hen nodded in understanding, her gaze filled with empathy. "Not surprised. That man has seen a lot of bad things. And people."

"You should tell him, it'll be easier for both of you," Eddie suggested gently, his eyes meeting yours with unwavering support.

Before you could respond, the shrill sound of the alarm shattered the silence, announcing multiple calls at once. Everyone turned their attention to Buck, who raised his arms playfully in surrender.

You leaned into Buck, stealing a quick kiss before jumping into action. "You're in trouble, and I don't think I can save you this time," you whispered teasingly, a playful glint in your eye as you prepared for the day ahead.

When you arrived at the scene, the full extent of the chaos became apparent. A pileup on the highway had caused a scene of utter devastation, with mangled cars strewn haphazardly across the road. Smoke billowed from the wreckage, obscuring the sky with a thick haze.

"My brother's here," you muttered, your voice tinged with resignation as you spotted Tim amidst the chaos.

Without hesitation, you and Hen rushed to assess the situation, your training kicking in as you surveyed the scene. Tim followed closely behind, his expression serious as he briefed you on the situation.

"Multiple vehicles involved, injuries reported," Tim explained, his voice tense with urgency. "We need to triage and assess the scene before you can begin extraction."

You couldn't help but feel a surge of frustration at the news. "What did you do until now?" you demanded, your tone gruff with irritation.

Tim sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping with weariness. "We tried to do some triage, but there are much more people trapped in cars than we thought," he admitted, his voice strained with exhaustion.

With a shared glance, you and Hen wasted no time in getting to work, your focus laser-sharp as you assessed the situation and began to formulate a plan of action. Despite the chaos surrounding you, you felt a sense of determination coursing through your veins, a fierce resolve to save as many lives as possible.

Eddie joined you, lending a helping hand as you worked together to triage the injured as Buck and Bobby prepared the necessary equipment, coordinating with the rest of the team.

Buck's eyes never strayed far from you, his gaze filled with concern and admiration as he watched you work. You spotted one victim in particular who needed immediate assistance. Their car showed signs of imminent danger, with smoke billowing from the engine and flames licking at the edges of the wreckage. The victim was unconscious, barely breathing, and time was of the essence.

"Buck! I need your help over here!" you called out urgently, your voice cutting through the chaos.

Without hesitation, Buck rushed to your side, his expression filled with determination as he assessed the situation. Tim couldn't help but notice the glances exchanged between you and Buck, couldn't deny the bond that existed between you and Buck, nor the unwavering support of Buck by your side.

"Bradford, take the conscious and slightly hurt victims out of the cars and away from this place," you instructed your brother, your voice firm with authority.

Tim nodded in acknowledgment, his gaze filled with pride as he followed your orders without question. With a shared glance, you and Buck continued to work tirelessly, your determination unwavering as you fought to save lives amidst the chaos of the scene.

The flames danced menacingly around the wrecked car as you and Buck exchanged a brief, determined glance before springing into action. With a sense of urgency, you assessed the situation, noting the victim's precarious position amidst the wreckage. Their breathing was shallow, and time was running out.

Working quickly but methodically, you and Buck coordinated your efforts, communicating silently as you devised a plan of action. Buck moved to one side of the car, while you positioned yourself on the other, your hearts pounding in unison as you prepared to extract the victim from the burning wreckage.

With practiced precision, you reached into the car, carefully maneuvering around the flames as you worked to stabilize the victim's condition. Buck mirrored your movements, his touch gentle yet firm as he assisted you in securing the victim's vital signs.

Tim's watchful gaze lingered on you and Buck as you worked together, his eyes narrowing slightly as he observed the subtle exchange between you. He couldn't help but notice the way your hands lingered on each other's, the way Buck never left your side in face of danger, guarding you from the fire.

You synchronized your movements, lifting the victim free from the wreckage with practiced precision. The flames licked at the edges of the car, threatening to engulf you in their fiery embrace, but you refused to be deterred, your determination unwavering as you fought to save the victim's life.

With a collective effort, you and Buck carried the victim to safety, laying them gently on the ground as you assessed their condition. Their breathing was shallow, their pulse weak, but there was hope yet. With swift yet careful movements, you administered emergency medical treatment, your hands moving with practiced precision as you fought to stabilize the victim's condition.

And as the flames finally engulfed the wrecked car, sending plumes of smoke billowing into the sky, your hearts racing with adrenaline as you watched the scene unfold before you.

When the last of the victims were safely extricated and the flames were extinguished, the chaos of the scene began to dissipate, replaced by an eerie calm. You gathered around the ambulance, watching as police officers worked to ease the flow of traffic, their lights flashing in the fading light of day.

Buck's arm was wrapped around your waist, a comforting presence amidst the chaos. He pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, his voice filled with admiration as he spoke.

"You were incredible out there, Y/N," Buck murmured, his eyes shining with pride. "And so beautiful in action."

You couldn't help but smile at his words, the warmth of his praise filling you with a sense of accomplishment. With Buck by your side, you felt invincible, ready to face whatever challenges came your way.

But as the scene began to return to normalcy, Tim approached with Lucy by his side. You and Buck subtly distanced yourselves, exchanging a quick glance of understanding. Tim's eyes flickered back and forth between you and Buck as he spoke, his expression a mix of curiosity and concern.

It was killing you to keep your love a secret, especially from your brother. Eddie's words painfully echoed through your mind, knowing that telling Tim might ease the awkward tension. But it might as well make it worse, considering Tim's opinion regarding Buck.

There was this general misconception of police officers about the other branch of first responders. In Tim's mind, Buck was this reckless guy, putting himself in danger without hesitation, without considering the risks. He is way out of your league, he thought. Fearing that one day, Buck's action will put you in danger as well.

Buck was this ball of happiness and joy, leaving the impression of childishness. But he was more than that. Buck was selfless, putting everyone's life upon his. He was this ray of sunshine, warming everyone's day.

"Damn, Y/N, you were seriously badass out there," Tim exclaimed, his voice filled with genuine admiration. "You did a great job."

You couldn't help but grin at your brother's praise, his approval meaning more to you than words could express. Despite the occasional clashes and disagreements, Tim's support was unwavering, a constant source of strength and encouragement.

"Thanks, Tim," you replied, your tone sincere as you exchanged a brief hug with your brother. "I appreciate it."

Lucy chimed in, her eyes shining with admiration. "Seriously, you guys were like superheroes out there," she said, her voice filled with awe. "I don't know how you do it."

Buck chuckled, a playful twinkle in his eye. "Just another day at the office," he quipped.

Tim's gaze lingered on you and Buck for a moment longer, his brow furrowed in silent contemplation. Lucy nudged him gently, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips.

Tim's expression softened, his gaze filled with concern,"Be safe out there, okay?"

You nodded in acknowledgment, the weight of Tim's words settling heavily on your shoulders. "I will, Tim," you assured him, your voice filled with determination. "You too."

Tim and Lucy patrolled the streets as the events of the chaotic scene replayed in his mind, his thoughts consumed by concern for his sister. He couldn't shake the image of you working alongside Buck, your undeniable chemistry and shared closeness impossible to ignore.

"Hey, Lucy," Tim began, his voice filled with uncertainty. "What do you think of Buck?"

Lucy glanced over at Tim, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips. She had sensed Tim's unease ever since you arrived at the scene, his protective instincts kicking into overdrive at the sight of you in danger, especially when Buck was the one who came to your rescue.

"Buck?" Lucy repeated, her tone thoughtful. "He seems like a good guy to me. Always ready to lend a helping hand, never backs down from a challenge."

Tim nodded, his brow furrowing in silent contemplation. "Yeah, but what about him and Y/N?" he pressed, his concern evident in his voice. "Do you think they're...you know..."

Lucy raised an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in her eye. "You mean, are they more than just friends?" she teased, a playful smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

Tim's cheeks flushed with embarrassment, but he pressed on, his curiosity getting the better of him. "Yeah, exactly," he admitted, his voice tinged with uncertainty.

Lucy considered Tim's question for a moment before responding, her tone gentle but firm. "I don't know. Tim, you know your sister better than anyone," she began, her voice filled with sincerity. "If Y/N cares about Buck, then maybe he's not as bad as you think."

Tim sighed heavily, his shoulders sagging with resignation. "I just want what's best for her," he confessed, his voice tinged with frustration. "I don't think Buck would be the best fit, but..."

Lucy smiled sympathetically, her eyes filled with understanding. "Sometimes, we have to trust that our loved ones know what's best for them. And if Y/N believes that Buck is the right guy for her, then maybe we should give him a chance."

Tim sighed heavily, knowing that Lucy was right. "Yeah, maybe you're right," he conceded, his tone resigned. "I just... I don't know what to do."

Lucy squeezed Tim's hand once more, her gaze filled with warmth and understanding. "Just be there for her, Tim," she said softly. "Support her, no matter what. And if Buck makes her happy, then that's all that matters."

Tim nodded in agreement, a sense of determination settling over him. "Yeah, you're right," he said, his voice filled with resolve. "And if Buck hurts her, I'll kill him."

Lucy couldn't help but chuckle at Tim's earnestness, her laughter ringing out in the quiet of the shop. "Yeah, sure tough guy." she teased, a playful twinkle in her eye.

After the chaos of the call had subsided and the shift had come to an end, you and Buck retreated to the comfort of his apartment for a well-deserved date night. The soft glow of string lights cast a warm ambiance over the room, creating an atmosphere of intimacy and comfort.

Buck's place was a reflection of his personality – eclectic and inviting, with an array of knick-knacks and mementos adorning the shelves. The scent of pizza hung in the air, tantalizing your senses as you settled onto his bed, the soft comforter enveloping you in its warmth.

With the pizza box balanced precariously on your laps, you and Buck leaned back against the pillows, your laughter filling the room as you reminisced about the events of the day. The TV flickered to life, casting a soft glow across the room as you settled in to watch an episode of your favorite crime drama.

As the characters onscreen navigated the twists and turns of the case, you found yourselves drawn into the storyline, eagerly discussing each plot twist and revelation as it unfolded. Buck's arm was wrapped around your shoulders, holding you close as you leaned against him, your head resting on his chest.

"This episode is intense," you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper as the drama unfolded on screen.

Buck nodded in agreement, his gaze never leaving the television. "Yeah, but it's nothing compared to the real-life drama." he replied, his voice tinged with a hint of seriousness.

You couldn't help but feel a surge of pride at his words, grateful for the sacrifices he made to keep others safe. "I know," you said softly, reaching up to brush a stray lock of hair away from his face. "But I'm glad we can still find moments like this."

As the episode drew to a close, you and Buck found yourselves lost in conversation, discussing everything from your favorite moments in the show to your plans for the future. Despite the late hour, neither of you were ready to part ways, content to linger in each other's company for as long as possible.

"Do you think Tim would mind if you spent the night here?" Buck asked tentatively, his voice laced with concern.

You paused, considering his question carefully. "Maybe," you admitted, biting your lip nervously. "But what Tim doesn't know won't hurt him, right?"

Buck nodded in understanding, his fingers gently tracing circles on your back. "I just want to make sure you're comfortable," he said softly, his gaze filled with love and tenderness.

You leaned into his touch, feeling the weight of his words wash over you like a warm embrace. "I am," you replied, your voice filled with certainty. "With you, I always am."

You settled into Buck's embrace, the warmth of his body enveloping you, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you. His arms around you felt like home, a safe haven in the midst of life's chaos.

"So, about that call," Buck began, his voice breaking the comfortable silence as he shifted slightly to get more comfortable. "Your brother was practically breathing down our necks the whole time."

You chuckled softly, remembering Tim's overprotective nature all too well. "Yeah, he does that," you replied with a playful smirk. "He thinks he's the big tough cop, watching over his little sister and all."

Buck's laughter filled the room, the sound warm and genuine. "Well, he certainly made his presence known," he replied, his tone filled with amusement. "I think he sent me enough death glares to fill a whole season of crime dramas."

You snorted in amusement, burying your face in his chest to hide your grin. "You should count yourself lucky he didn't pull out his handcuffs," you teased, earning a playful swat on the arm from Buck.

Buck chuckled at your playful remark, his fingers tracing lazy circles on your back. "Oh, I don't know," he said, his voice tinged with mischief. "I wouldn't mind borrowing them for the night."

You lifted your head from his chest, a mischievous glint in your eye. "Oh, really now?" you replied, a teasing smile dancing on your lips. "And what exactly would you do with my brother's handcuffs, hmm?"

Buck grinned back at you, his gaze smoldering with desire. "Oh, I think you can use your imagination," he said, his voice low and husky.

You felt a shiver run down your spine at his suggestive tone, the air between you crackling with anticipation. Leaning in closer, you captured his lips in a heated kiss, your hands tangling in his hair.

Buck responded eagerly, his lips soft and sweet against yours as he deepened the kiss, his hands wandering teasingly over your body. The heat between you intensified, desire simmering just beneath the surface as you lost yourselves in each other's embrace.

And it was one of the most intense and beautiful nights you'd spent with Buck, wrapped in each other's arms, lost in a world of passion and desire. But the fairytale ended just as quickly as it began, the morning sun casting a soft glow across the room as the loud banging on the door shattered the peaceful atmosphere.

Groaning softly, you shifted in Buck's arms, the warmth of his embrace still lingering on your skin. Tangled in bed, naked and happier than usual, you didn't mind the sound at first. But when it grew louder with each passing second, you couldn't help but turn to Buck.

"Please make it stop," you pleaded, feigning a dramatic cry as you buried your face in his chest.

Buck chuckled at your reaction, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead before untangling himself from the sheets and reaching for his underwear. "I'll go check it out," he said with a smile, his voice filled with warmth and affection.

You watched Buck move gracefully across the room, his muscles flexing beneath his skin with every step. Despite the annoyance of the situation, you couldn't help but admire the sight of him, the way he exuded confidence and strength even in the most mundane of tasks.

As your boyfriend opened the door, his smile faltered at the sight of your brother standing on the other side. Tim's expression was a mix of concern and frustration, his eyes darting around the room as if searching for answers.

"Buckley," Tim greeted him, his voice tight with worry. "Have you seen my sister?"

Buck's mind raced as he tried to come up with a plausible explanation. "No," he lied, his heart sinking at the realization of the predicament you were both in. "Did something happened?"

Tim's brow furrowed in concern. "She didn't come home last night, and she's not answering her phone," he explained, his voice laced with worry.

Without waiting for permission, Tim urged his way into Buck's place, his eyes narrowing as he spotted you, covered only by the sheets, in Buck's bed.

"Thank you for letting me know you're not dead," Tim said sarcastically, disappointment evident in his voice as he addressed you.

You bristled at his tone, your patience wearing thin. "I don't need to report to you every hour, Tim," you snapped, your voice laced with frustration. "I'm an adult, and what I do is none of your business."

Tim snapped back, his voice sharp with anger. "I didn't asked you to do that, I just need to know you're safe," he insisted, his concern for your safety overriding any sense of courtesy. "I don't care what you're doing or who you're fucking."

You held your ground, meeting Tim's gaze with steely determination. "I'm safe with my boyfriend," you declared, your voice unwavering. "And you need to worry less about me and more about your own life."

Tim's expression softened slightly at your words, but he remained wary. "Your what?" he asked, his tone incredulous.

You sighed, knowing it was time to come clean. "Boy-friend. Lo-ver. Whatever you want to call him," you replied, spelling it out for him.

Tim's eyes widened in surprise, but he remained skeptical. "Does reckless child suit him?" he quipped, his attempt at humor falling flat in the tense atmosphere.

You bristled at his words, feeling a surge of protectiveness toward your boyfriend. "Buck is so much more than that," you began, your voice soft but firm. "He's selfless, caring, and always puts others before himself. He's seen things most people couldn't even imagine, and yet he still manages to find the good in every situation."

You paused, searching for the right words to convey the depth of your feelings for Buck. "He's my rock, Tim," you continued, your voice filled with emotion. "He's there for me when I need him, no matter what. And I love him."

Tim's expression softened as he listened to your words, the tension in the room easing slightly. "I just want you to be safe, Y/N," he said quietly.

Buck stepped in, his presence a comforting reassurance by your side. "I care about Y/N," he interjected, his voice filled with sincerity. "And I wouldn't allow anything to happen to her. I love Y/N."

Tim's gaze remained cautious. "If she gets even slightly hurt for whatever reason, you're the first I'll be hunting down," he warned, his tone serious.

Buck met Tim's gaze head-on, his own resolve unwavering. "Yes, sir," he replied, his voice filled with sarcasm and amusement.

As Tim shook his head in disbelief, still trying to come to terms with the idea of his little sister being in a relationship with a firefighter, he couldn't help but see both you and Buck as two reckless kids in his eyes.

"Kids these days," he muttered under his breath, a mix of exasperation and resignation in his tone.

You and Buck exchanged a knowing glance, unable to suppress a shared smile at Tim's reaction. Once he left Buck's place, the tension in the room dissipated, replaced by a sense of lightness and relief. You and Buck shared a laugh about the absurdity of the situation, finding humor in the unexpected turn of events.

"That's not exactly how I imagined you introducing me to your brother," Buck quipped, his laughter echoing through the room.

You chuckled softly, leaning into Buck's side. "Hey, at least he didn't pull out his handcuffs," you teased, a playful glint in your eye. "I think he likes you."

Buck grinned back at you, his playful air returning in full force. "It's not too late to ask him for the handcuffs," he joked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

You rolled your eyes, swatting playfully at his arm. "Oh, shut up," you laughed, the tension of earlier completely forgotten. "We're gonna be late for work."

238 notes · View notes

ohnococo · 4 months

Text

Fight Night | CHAPTER 4 | MMA Fighter!Sukuna x Reader

“Further down the hall to the right if you want to find yourself a drink though.” Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. Something about the way he leans back onto his hands and sets his mouth into a line, brows rising as his eyelids lower, makes it feel like a test rather than a genuine offer. You consider taking the offer nonetheless, maybe clearing out something nice from whatever alcohol he had to make up for him wasting your time getting dressed up just to stand here feeling like he was playing some game with you without explaining the rules, or the goal.

Two months after you last closed the door on your "situation" with Sukuna, he sends you a message.

Notes: There's a tone shift here, and some development of reader i.e. explicitly stated hobbies.

Warnings: Oral sex (giving and receiving), deep throating, fingering, vaginal sex, manhandling, rough sex, ruined orgasm, creampie

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

You hated how much you’d dreamt of him texting you again. It felt pathetic, dreaming of a text. At least in your other dreams about him you’d suddenly find yourself in the middle of a club, dancing, his hands hot on your body, stirring you up even though in reality you were very much alone under your covers. But just a text would have you waking up with an uneasy churn in your stomach.

Just like the one you have now, but that second of wondering if it was actually happening is overtaken by the excitement that yes, it was. You even do a double take, thinking you might have imagined what was on the notification that had popped up, brightening your screen and presenting you with that little “👹👑” that had last left you giddy two months ago.

Then, you open your phone and actually read the message.

You free right now?

You roll your eyes, annoyed at his usual lack of formality. No hey, no how are you, no long time no see, just asking if you were free. It annoyed you even further that he couldn’t throw a little sugar on his first contact after months. You roll your eyes again as you begin typing your response, trying to stomp down the butterflies fluttering in your stomach despite him being straight to the point as always.

I thought you had to keep clean for 6 months?

When he’d told you that you took it as him saying that, at best, you two wouldn’t see each other until after his next fight, after all the random drug tests were out of the way and he was able to party with you like before. It was either that or what you’d come to accept was the far more likely scenario, which was him forgetting about you in that time, having found a new woman to party with the exact same way he’d found you. Here he was though, 4 months out from his next fight and texting you. Responding within a minute as well, to your shock as your phone lights up again just seconds after you’d locked it.

are you coming not?

You imagine the annoyed sigh that had preceded his message and smile as another one comes immediately. This time, it’s an address.

As you look it up you’re surprised to find it’s not some club, it’s a neighbourhood. A nice one. An area filled with giant gated houses, spanish style architecture with just a splash of McMansion flair, and uncomfortably uniform topiaries. Maybe it was a house party. Maybe it was a party at his house.

Another message comes through.

im free after 2

You’re more confused than before. 2? In the afternoon? You can’t even wrap your head around what kind of pre-gaming Sukuna had in mind to be meeting up so early, but you weren’t exactly going to say no. You never did when it came to him, especially not when you’d gone without as long as you’d gone with.

see you then

When you step out of your Uber you find that the house is just as big as you’d expected. He’d spent enough on your nights out for you to know by now that he had money to burn, but as you make your way up to the door in your heels you can’t help but think about how your own place could fit in the driveway alone.

Once you get to the front door you take a peek through the large accent windows on either side, seeing how spacious the house was just from the little view you could get. Then you ring the doorbell, tucking your small clutch under your arm to tug your dress down your legs a little as you wait for an answer.

The door opens and you’re unsurprised that the person answering is Uraume, though they do seem very surprised to see you.

“Why are you here?”

You’d learned not to take their brusqueness personally during the encounters you’d had with them since the first one. You’d figured that shared trait was why they got along with Sukuna so well.

“Sukuna said to come over after 2.”

Their eyes narrow. “And he asked you to come here?”

Heavy steps approach from the large, brightly lit hall just visible from where you were waiting at the door. Uraume stops, looking back as Sukuna appears. You’re surprised to see him out of his usual clubbing attire, no slacks, no expensive leather shoes, no button up straining over his musculature, not even a flashy chain around his neck or watch somehow large enough to be ostentatious on even his frame. Instead he’s in tight boxer briefs and nothing else, with a towel over his shoulder to catch the drips coming off of his wet hair.

“What’s the problem, Uraume?”

“I didn’t know you were expecting someone.” Any trace of shock or confusion that had been on Uraume’s face isn’t present in their voice as they speak to him, but apparently Sukuna senses it nonetheless.

“Do I need to tell you about every single person I bring into my own home?”

“Of course not.” Uraume steps back and opens the door wider, giving you space to enter. They close the door behind you and turn to Sukuna, giving a deep nod that borders on bowing before leaving towards what you presumed was the kitchen due to the distant sound of an extractor fan.

“Thank you, Uraume.” There’s annoyance there, but it’s a thanks nonetheless.

Sukuna looks you up and down, and somehow his expressionless appraisal is more intimidating despite having dealt with it several times before. You don’t want to hear it, not when you were still trying to figure out what exactly was going on tonight.

He can’t be stopped though, “I can always count on you to get all dressed up for me.”

Then, he’s tilting his head towards the hallway he’d previously emerged from, gesturing for you to follow as he walks off before you can respond, forcing you to catch up with his long stride in your heels. As you walk just behind him you glance into the rooms as you pass, finding them either blindingly bright due to the floor to ceiling windows, or incredibly dark with only the sunlight from the skylights above the hall illuminating them.

You’re half expecting him to take you to some room with a built in bar and all his entourage pre-gaming. Or pre- pre- gaming at this hour, maybe, but when you finish the walk through his halls and reach your destination you find that it’s just his bedroom. To your surprise, this room falls into the category of “blindingly bright” and the high ceilings and cold tile floors would leave it feeling sterile if it weren’t for the things filling it. Dark wood furniture, warm toned bedding, and monstrous looking masks above his bed not dissimilar to the little emoji you had in your phone representing him.

As he disappears into his walk-in closet for a moment you think you know what he’s getting at now, a party before the party, and you’re a little embarrassed at how your body is already responding to the thought of it.

Then… you’re just confused again as he re-emerges fully dressed in grey sweatpants and a tight white t-shirt - attire very much the opposite of what you were in. He says nothing, sitting on the edge of his bed and looking at you expectantly.

You swallow thickly, looking at him, “Well…”

Something about standing in front of him while he just stares silently has you suddenly feeling self-conscious about getting dropped off at a rich man’s house in the middle of the day, in tight clothes and makeup meant for dim lighting no less. On your nights out you could fool yourself into thinking you were on equal footing - or at least that there wasn’t such a gulf between the two of you as you blended seamlessly into his entourage. Here though, with just the two of you and no distractions, you feel very small in his big, big house. You feel small in front of him.

“Well?” He parrots you, undoubtedly taunting you with that glint in his eye. Your annoyance at that tone and at how it makes your pussy respond pushes you to finally form your confusion into words.

“So what are we doing then?”

He looks at you like you’re stupid, like he hasn’t been vague as hell like he always was, expecting you to be able to read his moves as he makes them. “Hanging out.”

“Hanging out?”

He raises his brows and tilts his head like it’s obvious, like he shouldn’t have to repeat himself.

“Just me… and you… and Uraume?”

A dismissive hand waves in the air, “Uraume is just finishing my meal prep, then they’re leaving.”

“Are we going out tonight?”

“I’ve got training at 5 tomorrow, and when I’m clean I’m clean.”

You cross your arms, scoffing at your inability to get an actual answer out of the man and getting a little sick of it. When your little display of petulance draws a chuckle from him you click your heel against the tiled floor, hoping it would distract from whatever tell you might have that his laugh alone was already turning you to putty in his hands.

“Further down the hall to the right if you want to find yourself a drink though.”

Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. Something about the way he leans back onto his hands and sets his mouth into a line, brows rising as his eyelids lower, makes it feel like a test rather than a genuine offer. You consider taking the offer nonetheless, maybe clearing out something nice from whatever alcohol he had to make up for him wasting your time getting dressed up just to stand here feeling like he was playing some game with you without explaining the rules, or the goal.

But… you don’t really feel like drinking if he isn’t. So you slip off your heels, deciding that you weren’t going to be uncomfortable in them at least, toss your small clutch onto his bed, and sit down next to him.

“Meal prep, training at the crack of dawn, not even one little drink… you’re really serious about this whole fighting thing, I guess.”

He looks irritated for a moment, but amused nonetheless. “I have been the reigning champion for 6 years, you know.”

You lean back onto your elbows, crossing your legs and looking up at him, trying your best not to give away that you already knew that.

“And 3 years before that at my last organisation.”

You knew that too, and that he’d been banned from there for fighting dirty. You knew a lot more about him since you’d last seen him, having watched what clips of his fights you could find. He was impressive, worthy of being as cocky as he was, worthy of all the starry eyed reactions he’d get on your nights out.

“That’s cool.” His brow raises and you go on, feeling the need to assure him that you weren’t being sarcastic with him for once, “it’s nice to have something you’re passionate about.”

His expression goes blank, and you’re beginning to realise when he’s indifferent and when he’s trying to look indifferent - that subtle distinction between him peering into you and looking through you.

“What are you passionate about?” You think he might be genuinely interested. “Other than getting fucked up.” You think he’s pretending he isn’t.

“Um…” you have a brief moment of suddenly remembering nothing you’ve ever done or liked just because you’ve been asked, and the smallest twitch of a smile forms at the corners of his lips before he seems to decide to throw you a bone, just this once.

“What are your hobbies?”

Your mind is still drawing a blank, but you’re more able to continue, feeling like talking about what you like feels a little easier than explaining something you were as passionate about as 6 Year Reigning Champion Ryomen ‘The King’ Sukuna was about fighting. “I like reading, playing video games… uh…”

It’s weird having a conversation with him. Not that you hadn’t before, but they were always dripping with innuendo, banter dipped in tension and implication acting to fill the gaps between drinks and drugs and fucking. Conversations containing questions like ’What do you do for work?’ followed up with ‘you don’t have some sugar daddy waiting for you to come pay him a visit tonight, right?’

Now there’s another kind of tension here, one that Sukuna cuts with his usual playful bite, “So you’re a bookworm and a nerd?”

Sitting back up, you open your mouth, ready to lash an equally sharp remark back to him, but he’s stopping you in your tracks with his next words.

“Cute.”

He’s said it before, several times, but it always had that curt tone in it, clearly broadcasting that it was meant as his own special word for you in lieu of calling you a brat. Because that’s always when you’d earned the name, when you were being a brat. This time you don’t feel like there’s anything behind it, and it might just be exactly what it was: Sukuna thinking that you’re cute.

Even considering that that might be the case makes a little bit of warmth blossom in your chest, then lower down when one corner of his mouth lifts just so and it looks like he knows exactly what it’s done to you. That’s his only tell, as he moves on quickly, wrapping his arm around your waist and resting his heavy hand on your hip.

“What kind of games?”

Now the blood that had rushed downward makes its way to your face as you shrug, “I dunno…”

“You don’t know what games you play?” His brows raise in a way that telegraphs he’s warning you not to lie to him, the thought of what the punishment might be for such a trespass has your mind racing.

You feel an odd pang of guilt in your chest though, for thinking of what he could do to your body when he seemed to be looking for an actual conversation, but then you’re second guessing even that. So you decide to just take it as what it is, a question, and answer it.

“I like Animal Crossing.”

“The children’s game?”

The bite is back as you roll your eyes at him, “It’s not just for kids.”

He smiles and squeezes lightly at your hip, then pulls you close, so your sides are pressed together and you have to tilt your head up to look at him. It makes you pause, makes you have to tell yourself not to be obvious in the way you cross your legs a little tighter. He doesn’t miss a thing, though.

“Well what’s this Animal Crossing about, then?”

“You’re a villager-“

“Like a peasant?”

“No, like… a little guy. Or girl, or whatever, and you move onto an island with a bunch of animals that live there too.”

His smile widens as his brows raise higher, “And that’s not just a children’s game?”

“It’s not just that, you basically build up a little town, planting trees, building things, decorating the place.” You pause, waiting for another remark from Sukuna, but find he’s just listening, waiting for you to continue. So you do, “You can even do things like fishing or catching bugs, it’s-“

He dips his head down and his lips brush yours, pressing for just a moment before he’s pulling back and speaking low. His nose is still pressed to yours, and hearing his voice at a near-whisper for the first time has your panties wetter than ever. “It sounds surprisingly peaceful.”

“I like a little peace and quiet sometimes.”

“Not when you’re out with me.”

You look into his eyes, and notice what an interesting shade they are, warm and deep and as intense as he was. It makes you realise that you’d never seen them without being overtaken by dilated pupils.

“Well… that’s you.”

The small ’Hm’ he lets out is dipped in something you can’t quite decipher yet, but it doesn’t really matter as his tongue parts your lips, giving you the kiss you’d come to crave. He lays you back, arm still underneath you, and you wrap your arms around him as he scoots you further up his bed bit by bit until your head is resting just below his pillows.

Whether the conversation before was genuine or simply pretence doesn’t matter now as he slips his muscled thigh between your legs, giving you an encouraging hum when you grind on it. Your hands are quick to find their way into his hair, then work their way down his back and up his sides. He feels so familiar yet different as the resumed training has made his body harder than before. When your hands finally make their way down to where his clothed cock rests heavy against your hip, you find a wet patch at the tip to match the one you were undoubtedly leaving on his thigh. His tongue is strong against yours, lips demanding as they lead until you’re moaning into his mouth, ready for him to do more than have you humping at his leg.

Sensing that, he pulls back, moving to lay beside you, hand on your jaw keeping you in place so he can look down at you as he speaks.

“Still scared to suck my cock?”

Here it finally was, that moment when he brings it up when you’re not too worn out to do something about that unstoppable smugness. You push him onto his back. Or, rather, you try to, finding him an unmovable object as your strength means nothing to him. He chuckles, and slides off of the bed to stand next to it.

“Here,” he slides his hands under your arms, pulling you until you’re lying on your stomach, elbows perched on the edge of the bed and peering up at him standing over you, “let me help you out.”

He hooks his thumb in the waistband of both his sweatpants and underwear, tugging them down enough to have his cock out and hanging, too heavy to stand fully on its own despite its hardness. He pumps it a few times, squeezing up slowly until a new bead of precum forms at the tip, and when you open your mouth wide, sticking your tongue out to catch it as it drips down, he gives you that wicked smile you know so well.

“You’ll have to get it nice and wet if you expect it to fit in your throat.”

“Obviously.” That was the closest he’d get right now to an admission of you being intimidated by his size, he already wasn’t letting you forget those words that first night you’d met.

He’s right though, so you lean forward and swirl your tongue around the thick head, wrapping your lips around for just a moment before shifting to latch onto the side of his shaft. He holds it steady by the base, watching you intently as you suck and kiss your way down, letting the spit gathered in your mouth cover it as you go, and giving him the smallest hint of what he wanted. As you lick your way back up to the tip you look up at him and he bares his teeth, eyes sparkling as you finally take it in your mouth again and slowly sink down.

Just as the head hits your throat, you pull back, eyes still on his, before going back down slowly. You bob your head up and down like this a few times, coating his cock more and more until spit is dripping down your chin and into the floor below.

Then, he pulls his cock away from your mouth and flips you flat onto your back, this time with your head hanging over the edge. You open wide, tongue out, and grab onto his hips as he wipes the head of his cock across your lips before pushing in. He pauses for a second when he’s about to enter your throat, releasing his grip on his cock now that he’s firmly anchored inside of your mouth, and pulls his shirt up and over his head, throwing it onto the ground behind him.

You wonder why he’d even put it on in the first place, then you wonder nothing at all as he starts pushing his way into your throat and you have no choice but to put your full focus on the challenge before you. He only goes so far before he’s pulling back until you’re tightening your lips over the head of his cock in a kind of kiss - catching your breath for just a moment before he’s parting them to push his way back in. He repeats this motion, pushing in a bit further each time, until he’s pressing his way all the way in until your nose is nuzzled into his heavy balls.

He stays there, low grown bubbling out from his throat, and your own throat starts to clench around the length inside of it. It’s not long before you’re squeezing at his hips and bringing your knees up. He pulls out then, and you only have a second to sputter and cough before he’s bending down and kissing you hard, tongue feeling much less invasive now that he’s had his monster of a cock in there.

When his lips part from yours, the smile he gives you makes your pussy flutter, “See, I knew you could take it.”

It feels like a compliment as much as it feels like a warning.

Then, he’s standing up, and sliding his cock right back into your mouth and down your throat in one quick thrust. As he fucks into your mouth you find that your throat, and lungs are indeed more accommodating than you had thought. The throbbing soreness of having something so thick so deep isn’t so bad, and you time your breaths perfectly before your air is cut off briefly from the intrusion. Eventually he stays deeper and deeper each time he pulls back until he’s barely leaving your throat before he’s filling it again.

His thrusts are slow and relaxed while he leans down and runs his hands over your body. He gropes at your tits, squeezes at your stomach, then settles a hand over your pussy. He presses firmly, moving his hand side to side as he enjoys the wetness already there.

“Tell me, are you this wet just from a few kisses, or from finally getting a taste of my cock?”

You wait for him to pull back and let you speak, or sputter, or even moan as he continues palming at you pussy. Instead he hooks a thumb into your panties, pulling them to the side and sliding two fingers into you while thrusting harder into your throat.

“Got nothing to say for yourself?”

In lieu of an opportunity to speak, you swallow around his girth, tightening your throat enough to have him hissing through clenched teeth. A laugh follows that has your pussy clenching, and the sudden knowledge that even that had your body needy for him pushes the sound from a chuckle to a pleased growl.

“That’s fine, just let this do the talking.”

He fucks his fingers into you fast, stirring you up so well you lose your focus on breathing when you get the rare opportunity. You feel yourself getting lightheaded, eyes rolling back, grip on Sukuna’s hips loosening, until he suddenly pulls back and returns to those much more shallow thrusts where he’s only barely entering your throat.

You think it’s a merciful break, until you realise he’s pulling his fingers out of you and repositioning himself to hunch down over you on the bed. He slides his arms under your thighs, before hooking his hand back in your panties and settling his face between your legs, cock back to bullying it’s way as deep as it can go in your throat while still letting him keep his mouth on you.

His tongue is big, lathing over your pussy in long firm strokes, dipping inside you just to feel you clench before he pulls it back out and presses the flat of it over your bundle of nerves. When he wraps his lips around it he sucks hard, pulling back with a wet pop and leaving you yelping around his length as the intensity borders on painful. Then, just as quickly as he’d done it, he’s rubbing it better with his tongue, warm and soft and working you towards your orgasm.

He keeps your panties firmly out of the way with his index, sliding his middle and ring finger inside of you to give you something to clench around as sucks and licks your pussy until it’s drooling for him. You can’t even tell whether the wetness dripping down your ass is from you or his mouth as he growls into it, seemingly driven back to that savage state he’d fucked you in once before just by the taste of you. It’s sending you flying to the edge, whole body tensing, not sure if you’re breathing and not sure if you really need to as he fucks your throat, and the final push comes suddenly as you start clenching around his fingers.

All at once, it’s ripped away from you and you’re tightening on nothing. The cold air is jarring as he sits up, mouth and fingers abandoning your pussy, cock vacating your throat, and you outright scream in frustration at having your orgasm ruined. He pulls you up, tossing you back into your earlier position with your head on his pillows before he’s flipping you on your front and pulling you onto your knees.

“Fuck, I was cumming!”

“Too bad,” he lines himself up with your pussy, “I need to fuck you.”

His words ring loudly in your ears and your head spins as you realise this is the first time the two of you will have fucked completely sober, though you hardly felt sober with the way he’d toyed with your pussy like that.

As he presses in, much more slowly than you were anticipating, he groans and throws his head back, hands rubbing over your ass.

“So tight… no one’s fucked you right since me, hm?”

You don’t intend to answer that. It wasn’t any of his business what you did, and didn’t do, in the time he’d left you hanging.

Sukuna won’t be ignored though, ending his slow push forward by shoving the last few inches of his fat cock into you hard and fast enough for a little skin on skin slap to ring out just as you yelp.

“You haven’t been fucked stupid like that again, have you?”

“N-no.” It’s hard to keep your composure when you’re being split open for the first time in months.

He pulls out to the tip, and you brace yourself for another punishing thrust, but instead he’s back to pressing in slowly. He leans down over you, tracing his tongue up your back as he continues fucking you deep, pausing every so often to kiss and nip at your skin until you’re arching your back, rocking back into him.

“There you go,” he squeezes your hips, picking up the speed just a little, “a pussy like this needs to be fucked often, doesn’t it?”

You nod, moaning as your orgasm is already inching closer thanks to his cock dragging deliciously along your walls.

“Guess I’ll have to keep you around then, it would be a shame to waste it.”

He’s stirring you up so well you can only think to agree. Of course you needed his cock, of course it would be a waste, and how gracious of him to sort you out like this. Like his cock was a favour. Like he hadn’t said just minutes ago that he was the one that needed it. Not wanted it, needed it.

Your head is spinning, stomach clenching as he begins to fuck you like he was making up for wasted time. It’s hard enough that you’re unable to stay upright, slumping forward as your arms give out on you. It doesn’t slow Sukuna down in the least, as he pulls you back into his thrusts quickly, fingers pressing into the very spots your body knew his bruises belonged. He leans up and into you, shoving your body forward enough that you throw a hand up to brace yourself from being pushed into the headboard as he leans his full weight onto you, reaching beneath you to swipe at your clit roughly.

He’s shoving you towards that edge again, making you whine and moan for him as you have no choice but to cum fast and cum hard, something he does right along with you as he’s snapping his hips against yours and filling you with wave after wave of hot cum.

You collapse fully beneath him, pussy still twitching every so often with the aftermath of your orgasm, Sukuna acting as a far too heavy weighted blanket on top of you while he gets his breathing under control after an orgasm that seemed to rip through him as hard as it had you. He seems to finally hear your struggle below as he sits up and pulls out, letting you take full breaths now with his weight off of you.

He tugs his sweatpants back up and lies down on his side next to you, pushing your hair out of your face to make sure you were at least conscious before letting out a small huff of a chuckle.

“I thought you had passed out for a second there.”

“Don’t give yourself too much credit.” The bite isn’t really there as your voice cracks and you lick your lips, mouth dry from how you’d been panting so hard.

Another chuckle and he’s rolling you onto your back and pulling you into him, sliding his fingers into your pussy and smirking as he feels your walls still twitching with the aftershocks of your orgasm. He leaves his fingers settled in there, playing idly in your warmth as you lie there under his smug gaze.

You want to say something but you don’t know what, and deciding he looks content in this silence you just let the moment hang. Then, as your heart steadies and your body stops buzzing with the soft afterglow, you find yourself clear headed for the first time since you’d gotten that text from Sukuna earlier this day.

“Fuck!” You push yourself up onto your elbows, trying to reach for where you’d tossed your small clutch on his bed but being stopped by his heavy arm across your body, fingers hooked securely inside of you.

Once you start to shove at his arm he sighs, sliding his fingers out of you to grab the small leather purse and tossing it onto your stomach. He seems entirely uninterested in whatever you were on about as he settles back down on the bed and slides his fingers back inside of you.

“I completely forgot I had actual plans tonight.” You’re annoyed at yourself for just forgetting everything the second you’d gotten one text from Sukuna.

You’re annoyed at yourself even more for admitting in front of him that you’d bailed on these plans without a word the second he came calling, catching the way his fingers stop stirring inside you for just a moment before they’re back to their lazy movements.

He doesn’t seem interested in teasing you for it at least, letting out a contented sigh as you dig your phone out from where it was squeezed into your clutch, taking up all the space in there save for a small slot for your lip gloss. He watches through half-closed eyelids as you type your message of apology to your friend. You don’t bother explaining yourself, knowing they’d probably text you something back about getting your back blown out and you didn’t need his head getting bigger about any of this. When he sees your messages he locks onto his name in your phone again before you lock it and start to put it back in your bag.

“Put my name in your phone.”

“What?” You look up at him, surprised he still cared about that. He doesn’t look mad, or annoyed even, not like he had the first time he’d seen it. Whatever is in his expression isn’t fully clear to you, though it doesn’t feel entirely unlike when you’ve disappointed a parent.

“Put my name in your phone. Properly.”

You watch him carefully as you pull your phone from where it was half-stuffed in your bag, and do just that. Looking down at the screen to type out ‘Ryomen Sukuna’.

“There.”

He pulls his fingers out of you, rubbing your wetness and his lingering cum through your folds, then patting your pussy lightly. Then, he pats it again, this time firmly enough to make you jump. “Good girl.”

CHAPTER 5

#reminder minors and ageless blogs get blocked #my writing #jjk fanfic #jjk smut #sukuna #sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x reader

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softstraykidshours · 1 year

Note

May i humbly request a cozy winter fic where Hyunjin just got off tour and he’s come down with something, maybe a stomach bug or a headache and a snow storm takes the power out and y/n (his gf) has to improvise when taking care of him and it’s all fluffy and cute🥹

Love ur writing btw

bestie, this is such a cute idea!!! we've been having a lot of big ice/snow storms where i live so this cozy winter fic was literally the perfect pick me up from the nasty weather. it felt so self-indulgent, and i had so much fun writing this so i really hope you like it!!

and thank you so much for your love and support!!

❤️ abbie & courtney

------------------------

“baby?” you ask softly as you walk into hyunjin’s apartment, closing the door softly behind you. you slip off your soaked boats and shake the snow off your coat, rubbing your hands together for warmth. a major snowstorm hit just as you were pulling into the parking lot and just the short distance to the front door left you covered in snow and freezing.

you walk quietly around the room looking for him, trying not to make too much noise in case he is asleep. he got home late last night from the latest tour, and the two of you were planning on having a date night since you hadn’t been able to see each other in so long. but you got a text from him late this morning saying he woke up feeling a little under the weather and was going to have to cancel.

you could tell from his messages that he felt terrible about having to cancel on your date, but you weren't focused on that. you were just worried about him being sick and alone in his apartment. so here you are at his doorstep, care package of hot soup and medicine in hand.

you had tried knocking, but he didn’t answer so you ended up using the key he gave you a while back to let yourself in. you eventually find him in his room, curled up under the biggest pile of blankets you have ever seen with only his face poking out. his eyes are closed but his forehead is scrunched, as though even in his sleep he still feels miserable.

“oh, baby,” you mutter quietly while slipping into the room and setting your stuff down on the dresser. you tiptoe over to him, reaching out carefully to touch his forehead without waking him. he either wasn’t sleeping very deeply or was never truly asleep, because the second the back of your hand brushes his too hot skin, his eyes flutter open. he blinks heavily a few times, trying to clear the fog around his head.

“loves?” he mumbles, voice thick with confusion and exhaustion. “what are you doing here? i thought i texted you about having to cancel. i must have dreamt it, i’m so sorry.”

he scrubs his eyes with the heels of his hands and moves to sit up, but you quickly interject to stop him before he gets too far.

“no, no, you’re okay! you did text me this morning.”

“then what are y--”

“you said you weren’t feeling well, so i thought i would come check on you to see how you were doing. and now i’m glad i did. baby, why didn’t you tell me you were so sick?”

“i didn’t want to worry you. plus, i knew that--” he pauses for a moment to let out a series of violent coughs. a shiver takes over his body when he finishes hacking, and he burrows further into the blankets, trying to pull them even tighter around himself to stop the shaking before continuing. “i knew that if i told you how badly i really felt that you would come over, and i didn’t want to get you sick too.”

“well, here i am anyways,” you smile lightly, and he lets out a weak laugh before more coughing takes over. your smile quickly fades as concern takes over your expression, and you settle yourself on the edge of the bed next to him. you reach up again to feel his face and curse softly under your breath when you feel how scorching his skin feels.

“baby, you’re burning up.”

“are you trying to tell me i’m hot? because you can just come right out and say it, no need to be embarrassed,” he weakly jokes, trying his best to put a smile on his face. you can’t help the way your heart warms at how he always tries to cheer you up no matter how miserable he feels at the time.

“oh hush,” you roll your eyes, but the playful grin on your face reveals just how much you appreciate him. “now, let’s get you feeling better.”

you get up from the bed to grab your stuff from the dresser but pause when hyunjin starts to protest. “but loves, you shouldn’t be here, you’ll get sick too. i’m fine really. you can go. i’ll be okay.” he barely gets the words out before he starts coughing again.

turning back towards him, you put one hand on your hip, giving him a look that shows just how unconvinced you are. “jinnie, you’re hacking like you have the black lung, you’re skin is on fire, and you’re burrowed so far under those blankets i can barely see you.” you sit down next to him once more and soften your tone slightly. “just let me take care of you.”

“but you’ll get sick,” he continues to argued, always worried about you and your safety. “i don’t want--”

you cut off his protests by leaning in and kissing him, his lips feverishly hot against yours. “there. now i’ve been fully exposed, so i might as well stay.”

“why would you-- ugh, loves. you shouldn’t have done that, now you’re almost guaranteed to get sick too,” he huffs at your insistence to stay, but his complaints have lost their fervor, and you can tell that the part of him that wants you there with him is winning.

“now, where was i…aw yes, getting you feeling better,” you grab your stuff off the dresser and turn to head to the kitchen, pausing in the doorway for a moment. “i’ll be right back. i just need to put this soup on the stove so it can stay warm. have you been drinking any water?” he shakes his head slightly.

you head out to get everything ready, returning shortly with a glass of water and some pills. “here take these, they should hopefully help you feel a little better.”

he sits up to take a sip of the water, the blankets falling off him in the process, causing shivers to break out over his body as the air hits his feverish skin. you quickly move to wrap them back around him, but pause when you feel how damp his sheets are. “baby, your sheets are all sweaty from curling up in them all day with a fever. you can’t keep laying in them like this, it will just make you feel worse. here, let's move out to the couch for a little bit so i can wash these, okay?”

he nods in agreement, and you help him up, surrounding him in clean blankets once he’s settled on the couch. you then strip his bed and throw everything in the washer. “almost done!” you tell him from the other side of the apartment. “i just have to get this started and then i’ll grab your soup.”

you set the washer but just as you are about to hit start, suddenly the lights flicker before everything goes dark. pulling out your phone flashlight, you make your way back to hyunjin who is now sitting up on the couch, head turning back and forth as he tries to see through the darkness.

“hey, it’s okay, you can lay back down. it’s just a power outage. there was a big snowstorm that started right before i got here, so it must have knocked out the electricity.”

you tuck him back into the couch before rustling around to find a few candles and set them around the living room and kitchen, casting everything in a soft orange glow.

“there, that should do the trick for now,” you look around the room, and your gaze catches on the pot you had simmering on the stove. “oh! your soup! you should eat it before it gets cold, because i won’t have a way to heat it up again.” you bring a bowl over to him and help prop him up to eat, ensuring all the blankets are still keeping him as covered as possible.

he sips tentatively on the soup, taking the smallest bites you have ever seen. “does it taste okay? i’d never been to the place before, but it was on the way, and i didn’t want to take too long to get here. i’m sorry if it’s not good, you don’t have to eat it," you start rambling, but he interjects before you can continue.

“no, no, it’s delicious,” he reassures, taking a slightly bigger bite. “it’s just, this is the first thing i’ve had all day so i’m trying to go slow to make sure it doesn’t upset my stomach.” you open your mouth to scold him for not eating, but bite back your words when you see the sheepish expression on his face. “thank you so much for bringing it for me, loves, and just for being here in general.”

“of course! you know i--” your words are cut off by more coughing from hyunjin, and you grab the soup, helping hold it until the fit is over so it doesn’t spill all over him.

“i'm sorry, loves. i was going to try to make you some ginger tea to help with your cough, but the power went out before i was able to boil some water,” you pause for a moment, racking your brain for ideas. “oh! i do still have the honey that i bought for your tea. when you’re done with your soup we can try some of that, and it might help with your cough.”

“sounds perfect,” he says, offering you a soft smile before taking a few more bites of his soup. you spend the next few minutes in silence, curled up next to hyunjin while he eats. he doesn’t sit up for long, but you can tell by the time he’s finished that he’s absolutely exhausted from the small amount of energy he expended. you offer him some honey and another glass of water before helping him settle back down on the couch.

his forehead is still unnaturally warm so you wet a washcloth with one of the water bottles from his fridge, since the water apparently also went out with the power, and place it gently on his forehead. you sit in the armchair on the other side of the living room in order to give him some space. moving one of the candles closer, you pull out the book you brought and start quietly reading while he rests.

you don’t know how much time passes with you reading, glancing up every once in a while to make sure he’s okay when you hear him shift around on the couch, trying to get comfortable. eventually a quiet, hoarse voice breaks the silence, pulling your attention away from the pages in front of you.

“loves?” the pitiful look on his face pulls at your chest. it’s obvious just by looking at him how miserable he feels, and you wish you could do more to make him feel better.

“yes, baby? do you need something?”

“can you hold me?” your heart aches at his words, and you simply nod in response, unable to speak over the lump forming in your throat. you move over to the couch, helping him shift down so you have room to sit. making sure the blankets stay tucked around him, you pull his head into your lap.

you take the washcloth off his forehead, bending down to plant a gently kiss on his temple. you then flip the cloth over and set it back on him, so the cooler side is up against his skin. you start running your fingers gently through his hair, humming softly as you do and his eyes flutter closed at the soothing gesture. eventually his features soften, the uncomfortable expression disappearing from his face as his breathing slows. you continue long after he falls asleep, so grateful to finally see him so relaxed and comfortable.

#hyunjin imagines #hyunjin x reader #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #hyunjin #stray kids #hyunjin fluff #stray kids fluff #hyunjin timestamps #stray kids timestamps #timestamps #mine #soft stray kids hours #q: painting with hyunjin

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veeluvss · 1 year

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My Girl, Lily Prentiss (3)

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

"I knew you'd still be here," Rossi sighed, stepping into Emily's office. "Hi Dave," Emily sighed, putting some hair behind her ear. "How are you doing?" "How would anyone be doing right now?" she snapped but then felt bad. "Sorry, I just," she took a deep breath. "How about you head home? Get some rest so you can think clearly," Rossi suggested. "I can't do that," she said, holding up her file. "Work to do." "Have you eaten?" "No, I'm not hungry," Emily replied. "Emily," Rossi said gently, he came around her desk and closed her laptop softly. He sat one leg on the desk, lifting himself up and turned to the raven-haired girl. "This is going to be so much harder if you don't look after yourself," Rossi told her. "I'm fine." "Don't bullshit me," Rossi said, so calmly. Emily couldn't help but laugh. She leaned back in her chair and turned to him. "I know it hurts. I know it's hard. You need a clear head to get the quickest and best result in finding her. Go home and rest." Emily groaned and nodded. "I can't believe I let this happen. If I'd known they were treating her like-" Rossi stopped her with his hand. "I know. That's why you need to protect her now."

That night, Emily slept heavily, the stress of the day exhausting her. She dreamt of Lily, now. Being her own. She dreamt of waking up to her brunette baby beside her in bed after a nightmare, holding her close, and smelling her hair. She dreamt of taking her girl out to the park, on a walk or out to dinner to treat her. She dreamt of her girl's laugh, her cry, her smile. She dreamt of her having Lily back, as her own.

"Right, if I'm Lily, where would I go?" Morgan asked, standing around the table.

The team had concluded that Lily had originally run away from home however, the lack of contact had been disturbing. The last she was seen was getting in a black SUV outside a gas station, 20 miles from her home. There were two people in the front of the car and Garcia, for the life of her, couldn't trace them or the vehicle. "I'd find someone to love me," Tara said, honestly. "Skyla told me that Lily regularly told Tori she didn't feel loved." "Is that not what she was trying to do online?" Morgan asked, writing it on the board nonetheless. "A young girl reaching out for validation on her body is very different to finding someone to love her," JJ explained. "Perhaps she had a boyfriend." "All of her chats I could find were all her deals, none of them even slightly resemble a relationship," Garcia shrugged, tapping on her laptop. "Could she have had a boyfriend in person?" "Her teachers doubt it, she spoke to no one. When she was in school that is." "What about out of school?" "Again. Everyone agrees they've never seen her with other people." The group went silent, all deep in thought. "Has anyone spoken to her biological parents?" Reid asked, suddenly thinking. JJ nodded, "Prentiss is there now."

Keeping her hands at her side, Emily walked through the prison. She waited for the guard to push open the door then clenched her jaw. Harold Addams. The sight of the man in front of her made her unbelievably angry. He destroyed her life. "Prentiss, Prentiss, Prentiss," he sniggered, folding his arms across his chest. "Long time no see." "Addams," she said sternly, sitting in the chair opposite him. "What did I do to deserve such a pretty reward hm?" He asked. Emily felt sick. "Where's your daughter?" "Lily? Well, shouldn't you know that?" "She's been missing for three days. Where is she?" Prentiss wasn't playing around. "How would I know? I'm locked up." He was answering questions with questions. "Have you been having any correspondence outside these walls?" "Only with you beautiful lady," he glistened, leaning forwards. Emily scoffed, "usless."

Garcia sat in her tech cave, searching through every bit of this girls life. She'd unsealed records, she'd logged into all her accounts, read her messages, her emails, her bank statements. Lily was loaded with sugar daddies and in a normal instance, Penelope would be jealous. She hummed as she tapped away on her computer, trying to find even a trace of some sort of dodgy deals behind the scenes. She groaned, picking up her laptop and heading to the round table. Reid was there with JJ, scoring through the printed documents.

"Doesn't it make you wonder why Emily was so connected to her?" Reid asked, as Garcia sat down. "It was a failed undercover mission, Em was trapped in there with Lily as her only mental escape," JJ explained, shrugging. "She was only seven, she didn't understand," Reid siad, frowning. "That's the point," Garcia said. "It's like me looking at all these baby animal pictures," she smiled and sent them to the screen. She cooed at the fluffy baby cows with flowers in their mouths. "Yeah, her break, her way to realise there was still innocence there," JJ explained.

"Why do you think they used the little girl though?" Tara asked, coming into the room also. "People show a more vulnerable side with kids," Spencer said. "Statistically, 68% of abductions are more successful if a child is involved to lure them in." "So they used Lily as a way to get women to them?" "Yes. That's what they did." Emily confirmed, coming in the room. "They would look after her, bathe her, treat her like a princess and then if she did the slightest thing wrong, her dad would rip them away - rape them so she could hear them and then hand them back all bloody and bruised. If the women did something wrong, he'd beat Lily in front of them." "Jesus," Rossi groaned, taking a seat. "Emily, what role did the brothers have? These cases keep-" "That's it! The brothers!" Spencer said suddenly, standing up. Everyone looked at him. "Richard Addams and Thomas Addams. Look here," Spencer said, grabbing a piece of paper he discarded. It was chats between LILLIL, URB0YISR1CH and TOMCATDADDYRAT. It looked like normal texts to the naked eye but now with an idea on the names, Spencer began circling certain parts of the conversation: 'Gas', 'Law and order', 'back' , 'love', 'daddy's girl'. Every second word made a sentence on it's own. The boys were giving her a meeting place.

"Guys..." Reid said. "They were telling Lily to be at the gas station at 3am in order to avoid the cops and they could stay hidden. They want her to feel the love, the one her daddy gave her." He read out, like a robot.

"What does that mean?" "That means they're just as bad as their father." Emily spat out. "Find who these boys are Garcia," she added, walking away. "Now!"

Emily paced up and down her office. This wasn't possible. Richard was dead. Emily had killed him. She had no idea how it was possible. She remembered hearing Lily's screams and Richard's groans in pains. She could hear Thomas screaming for his brother to move. He begged him to move, to breath. Thomas was praying his brother wouldn't die - not like this. Lily scrambled into Prentiss' lap, assessing her brother with the agent. "Richy," the small girl whimpered, touching the blood pouring from the boys chest. "Get her out Prentiss!" Emily heard one of her team members say and she nodded. She grabbed the girl's weak body. Lily clung to her, hiding her face in her neck as Emily shielded her from the gunfire. They ran through the warehouse, Emily trying her hardest to remember the way out.

Eventually, she escaped into the sunlight and dropped to her knees, cradling the crying girl in her arms. "It's okay sweetheart," she whispered, brushing Lily's bloody hair from her face. Her blonde hair, now splattered in red. "Emmy's got you."

Emily had shot Rich in the chest, they both watched him bleed out. It wasn't possible he was alive now. There was a knock on her office door and she just opened it. JJ stood there, wringing her hands together. Emily let her in, closing the door behind her without saying a word. "We've spoken to Thomas's foster parents, since he turned eighteen, they haven't seem him at all," JJ told Emily. "Okay." "Garcia is running their information, trying to find out anything she can on the boys." "Okay." "Em," "He's meant to be dead." Emily said, staring out of the window. "I killed Richard Addams and now he has come and taken my baby away," she whispered. Her hand rested on her chest and she felt the pain.. "We'll find her Em, and the boys too. They won't get away with this," JJ said, she rested her hand on Emily's shoulder, offering support. "Damn right they won't," Emily said. She turned abruptly and walked out the door, leaving JJ behind in her office.

Tara and Morgan were back at Lily's house, looking for any sort of sign she knew her brothers. They'd searched everywhere they could think of until Morgan got a call from Garcia. "Please tell me you have good news Baby Girl," "She keeps talking about a cabinet." Garcia said. "'I keep special pictures locked in the cabinet for you,'" Reid quoted through the phone. "Okay, what does that mean pretty boy?" "I think the pictures might be some sort of coy. Maybe its information, is there any sort of cabinet there?" Reid asked. Morgan looked around her room, phone at his ear. "Not an obvious one." "What about anywhere else in the house? The Bathroom?" "Why would she keep secret things in the family bathroom?" Derek asked but walked towards it nonetheless. "Nobody will think to look there," Garcia added. Morgan shrugged and investigated the cabinet. Then he saw it, the pill bottle with writing on both sides of the label. Instantly he peeled off the sticker, looking on the back. It was an address. Tara was over his shoulder.

"Let's go." They said together.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ table of contents

#criminal minds #criminal minds evolution #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau head canons #emily prentiss head canons #jennifer jareau x reader #emily prentiss x reader #jennifer jareau imagine #emily #lily prentiss #my girl lily prentiss #emily prentiss x daughter

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i-cant-sing · 6 months

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Ya know those dreams where there is so much plot happening and you can barely keep up and when you wake up you can only remember like 1 thing?

Last night I dreamt that I was in an arranged marriage (idk who arranged it cause I'm an adult and don't speak to my parents) but I get married and like a month into the marriage, we're climbing something and he gets knocked out and like his gamer stats appeared above him and I found out he was 3'3, which is weird cause he was taller than me (he was like 5'8, I'm 5'2) and he was really mad about the fact that I knew for the rest of the dream. he was really nice tho and wasn't mad at me, he was just mad that I knew

BRO I LOVE SLEEPING SM BECAUSE THE WAY MY MIND MAKES DREAMS SPONTANEOUSLY- I COULD NEVER😭😭😭

I remember having this vivid, jarring dream where I was home alone, and some dude came up to my door and was like "I like you and I wanna get married to u. Let's go out?" And he takes me on a car ride and throughout the ride I roasted tf outta this guy cause he was OLD (I'm talking 60s) and he had white hair and a white beard but he was like handsome and fit and athletic build and tall, etc. And even though I kept insulting him and telling him all the reasons why we're incompatible, this dude just smiled softly and had goo goo eyes for me and then we returned to my home and as I got in, he said he was now even more sure that he wants to marry me, and I was like "even if I agreed, which I don't, my parents would never-" and then my uncles and parents come home and they're like yelling at this guy to fuck off and they're like pushing him out of the house but then this old dude gets REALLY MAD and starts fucking screaming and his eyes turn completely black and he's yelling "SHE'S MINE! SHES MINE! ILL MARRY HER ALONE! MINE!" and then idk why, but he suddenly sent a cannonball of fire inside the house and my mom's losing her marbles because wtf is this otherworldly creature????? Meanwhile, this old dudes family pulls up outside our house (and it's people of all ages, from babies, children to adults) and are trying to sweet talk to my family into giving my hand in marriage to this man, but obv my family is like no, and pushes the old dude out of the house. Meanwhile, my mom is crying in the corner and I'm just whining about there being so much noise that it's disturbing my studies.

Anyways, for some reason, I poke my head outside the door to see if these people are gone, but just then someone- a teen girl (maybe 17?) From his family was leaving when she looked back at me and looked me up and down and then had this smile on her face (it wasn't necessarily creepy, but it was... it just told me she wasn't human either) and she said "oh, you're nice. I can see why he likes you." And nodded her head in approval.

And then I wake up and obviously, every bizarre thing- I gotta tell my mom about it. And poor woman, omg she is HORRIFIED as I tell this dream with glee and she's like "I'd never let you marry someone so old and creepy and scary!😭😭😭" and I'm like okay. And then she's like "who do u think the old guy was? Do u know him?" And I'm like I've never seen him before, but he didn't feel like he was human. At first, I thought he was the devil/Shaytaan. But then I saw his family, and it clicked to me that these might be a clan of jinns/djinn (it's an Islamic thing okay? Just look it up yourself) and basically I've heard stories that these supernatural creatures often fall in love with humans and then are dead set upon marrying them and even isolate them/possess them so that they can't marry anyone else and make them so crazy and unhinged that their own family doesn't wanna be near them and now the human's only source of comfort is with the jinn.

So like.... yeah🥰

And my mom was like "SNOW WHY WOULD U THINK THAT! NEVER EVER TELL ME YOUR DREAMS AGAIN!" and I think it's cause a part of her thinks that dreams have subliminal messages/ability that these might come true (cause again, we've all heard of stories that jinns can actually come in your dreams to give you some messages or what not) and I'm just giggling away while she's freaked out.

I think the only other dream of mine that freaked her out like this bad was the one where I explained in gruesome details on how I was buried alive. Like I told her that when they laid me in the grave, I could feel the wet muddy ground against my back💀💀 and she told me to stop before I could say more.

#i love my dreams #so much

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rendy-a · 1 year

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An Old-Fashioned Calling with Rook Hunt

In consolation of @strawberrymilk-sunshine in not getting her vampire hunter Rook card from the gacha. The gacha can be so cruel. A drabble on Rook and his cards.

You had read about calling cards in old books. From a time when a butler would be on staff to answer the door of a home in say Paris or London. If the occupant was out, the visitor would leave behind a card instead, to let you know that they had come calling. You supposed that was what this was, examining the card you’d found wedged in the front door of Ramshackle. It was a small card the size of a business card, a simple card of cream with black ink. On one side was a small poem, “A sight of you when you cannot be seen,” and on the other side was a small line drawing of yourself. Not professional by any means but you think it the hand of a skilled amateur, or at least someone who knows enough of art to understand where to focus. You turned it over again to see if you could find a clue of who had sent it and for what purpose, but the simple card gave no further secrets. With a small, puzzled shrug; you took it inside and tossed it on your bedside table, thinking no more of it.

At least until the next card arrived. This one was written upon the same cardstock as the previous. It appeared one day between when you left for class and when you returned to grab a forgotten item over lunch break. It was a strange time to have come visiting as any other student would have to have known you would not be at home during those hours. The message was then clear; not “I was here when you were out” but “I was purposely here when I knew you would not be.” It still gave you no hints as to the reason. The script on the simple card said, “For one who lingers in my thoughts as the scent of a flower lingers on the breeze.” You think you smell a slight perfume on the card and, bringing it to your nose, confirm it contains the scent of lilac. You set this card with the other upon your bedside, but they are no longer so forgotten.

The third card comes while you are on your nightly walk with Tsunotarou. You can’t help but feel your visitor is bold to come calling on you while the Diasomnia House Warden is about. This card is different than the previous two, being made of a soft paper that is almost velvet-like to the touch. You rub your finger over it absentmindedly as you read the inscription. “I long to feel the softness of your cheek beneath my hand.” So, your caller is amorous in intention, their purpose finally known. You turn the card over eagerly, looking for details of your mystery admirer but find none. With a frustrated harumph, you add this card to your collection.

The next card is already at your door when you wake in the morning. It is the same plain paper as the first two, but the message is strange. “Last night, I dreamt of your kiss, a flavor as sweet as a fruit upon the vine.” You puzzle at it, turning over the card a time or two, hoping to draw out another clue on it. You hesitantly bring it to your nose and sniff, wondering if it is secretly scented again. While it isn’t really, you do note that the card has a slightly sweet smell. It’s so strange that you stare off into space while puzzling it over. Then suddenly, you had it. The first card had been about sight, the second smell, the third touch - which means the fourth card would likely hold a secret related to one of the other two senses, sound or taste. You feel a bit foolish, but you bring the card to your lips and give it a small lick. It is indeed flavored with some sweet concoction; apple, you think.

You spend the day in class wondering about the next card. According to the pattern, it would be tied to sound. How can you have a written card tied to sound? The answer arrived as the sun is setting over Night Raven College. You are just arriving back home after running an errand for Crowley when you see the tell-tale card in the door. Your pace picks up into a run as you excitedly claim the card from the door-frame. “I wish to call you not by name but as I feel about you.” You turn the card repeatedly, looking for a further message when a hand reaches over your shoulder to take the card from you. “Mon Amour,” says a voice behind you. You know that voice. You turn around with a smile and greet your admirer, Rook Hunt. You feel like you deserve to take him in with all the senses he has reminded you of; the sight of his smiling face, sound of his voice, the smell of his cologne (how rare for him to wear a scent), the feel of his cheek as you caress it before claiming a taste of his lips.

Later, you add his latest card to the collection by your bedside. Each card, one you’ll cherish, full of memories of the one you love.

#twst wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland #rook hunt #rook x reader #rook hunt x reader

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leafsgarbage · 1 year

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leave before you love me | m.a.

A/N: It was hard to figure out how to go about this one

Synopsis: He doesn’t really want you to care for him and the little scars he hides so well

Genre: Band!AU, fluff, angst (duh)

Warnings: drug use, strip clubs, toxic relationship,

Pairings: leadsinger!Atsumu x f!reader, timeskip!Atsumu x f!reader.

Main Masterlist

preview,

“We’re going tomorrow night.” Mila says to you. She’s been raving about this band for the longest time. “Taro is opening for them!”

You pull up your head from the kitchen table, you got home 20 minutes ago from working at the club and your head hurts. She knows you love Taro which is why she used that against you. “Fine. I’m not working tomorrow anyway.”

She claps her hands together. “Maybe you could wear what you’re wearing now! Your bodysuit looks cute. Did they tip you for handing them drinks.”

You smile, remembering it was a busy Thursday. “Yea, a bachelor party came in, and although I think they’re absolute pigs, they do tip a shit ton.”

“Ugh, I wish, my shift starts at seven pm, and I finish at midnight so I’ll meet you at the club they’re performing at.” She looks at her watch and notices it’s about six am. “Agh, go to sleep ok, get some rest.”

“G’night.” You change out of your clothes, shower, and then you fall dead on your bed.

You hardly ever have dreams, but this time, you dreamt that you and Mila were somewhere better than a scruffy two bedroom apartment in the middle of Chicago. Despite the shitty apartment, you two had a wonderful view of the city, and that was about the nicest thing you had.

Working as a waitress definitely helped you be able to pay your rent and own a couple of nice things. You love the girls you met there, but you just aren’t sure if this is what you want to be doing forever. There was just never another option for you.

When you wake up its one in the afternoon. You have a long day before you have to meet up with Mila, so you clean the house, make breakfast, and get ready to head to the gym.

It’s about 5pm when you walk in and spot Kenma and Kuroo, your friends from the orphanage. “Hey!” You wave them down and Kuroo gives a big and bright smile while Kenma waves slightly. They own the gym chain after Kenma made a fortune doing what he loves and Kuroo was a good business partner. They’re like you and Mila, joint together. “I haven’t seen you guys around here in forever! What are you guys doing?”

“Monthly inspection at the gyms.” Kenma replies.

Kuroo spits and laughs. “There’s a band that this kid likes in town, so we decided to kill two birds with one stone.”

You think for a second. “Is it the Jaguars or something? Mila and I are going to that too, tonight.”

“It’s The Jackals,” Kenma corrects.

Kuroo points at Kenma then looks back at you. “Did you get reeled in because she said-”

“Taro was going to be there, yes I did.” You two laugh together. Kuroo introduced you to Taro, he’s very big and upcoming, but you assume The Jackals are too since so many people like them. “Do you guys wanna work out with me? Its leg day.”

The two of them cross their arms in an X and shake their heads. “Last time we did that, Kenma was bedridden, and my co-workers made fun of me, so no thank you Sweetie.”

You laugh and punch Kuroo’s shoulder, everyone at the orphanage called you a sweetheart, so Kuroo aptly nicknamed you Sweetie. “Alright you big babies, I’ll see you at the concert.” They wave goodbye and you get to work.

You pull up your workout playlist and decide to add some of The Jackals’s song that would fit your workout playlist. You add Hardest to Love, Starboy, When will I See You Again, and Gimme Love. The first song was upbeat and everything, but the message behind it was so sad. He’s singing how hard it must be to love him and he feels bad that the other person tries so hard and puts up a front to be with him. Obviously at the end, they eventually give up and he talks about how he knew this was going to happen.

Your heart clenches, but you continue to the next song. Starboy was even more upbeat that the last, but it was very accusatory. Like they were pointing a finger at someone and telling them ‘look what you did to me.’ You liked it.

When Will I See You Again was softer than the other two and it was sweet. Not as loud about their feelings as the other ones. It was just about holding someone close to them after them being away.

Then Gimme Love was about a relationship that was pretty doomed, but he can’t help but stay and try his best. He wants what they used to be, and even though it’s not good now, he can’t let go of them.

You listen to your regular playlist by Taro after you finish your squats and head to the leg press. You loved all his songs, but Psycho and Stay were your favorites, you just hoped he played them at his concert.

Once you finish up your workout its already 7pm. You head back home, eat dinner, and go shower again. You get ready in your concert clothes with your boots so your feet don’t die in the mosh. You also put on some makeup, jewelry, and perfume so you don’t smell too bad.

It’s 11pm once you finish and you rush out to get on the train. It’s about a 30-minute ride and you continue to listen to your Taro playlist, excited to see him so soon.

You get off on your stop and walk to the venue. It’s at an underground club in Chicago, they aren’t big artists yet, so the venues are smaller. You were there decently early, there were only about a handful of people so you grabbed a drink and sat at the bar.

You texted Mila to tell her were you were and she said she was leaving the club already. You texted Kuroo and he said they were driving and there was a crazy amount of traffic. So you just sat by yourself.

“Hey, can I get a blue moon.” The bartender cracks one open and hands it to him. “Thanks.”

You chuckle at the guy and he looks at you questioningly. “No orange?” You ask. Normally most people drink it with an orange.

He looks down at his drink and nods. “Didn’t feel like an orange kinda night.”

“I guess that’s fair.” You shrug and continue to sip on your drink.

“What about you, what are you drinking?”

You smile and nod your head. “Uh, sprite, ha.” The man chuckles.

He has a wonderful smile, you note, and his physique is quite impressive. “What are ya doin’ here so early? Big fan?”

“Um, my roommate told me to be here at midnight, so I like to be punctual.” You shrug

He nods in understanding and begins to take a seat next to you. “What’s yer name?”

You tell him. “You can just call me Sweetie. What about you?”

His eyes widen and you don’t know what you did wrong. “So, you came here, just for yer roommate, not cause you know the band that’s playin’ tonight?”

You shake your head. “I know Taro, and I just started listening to a few of the The Jackals’s songs today.”

He sets his beer down on the table and crosses his arms. “And which of their songs are yer favorite right now?”

You hum and think for a bit. “I think it’s Hardest to Love. I liked the openness of it. How he understands that he’s not easy to handle, but that he did love the person and he wishes he could have fixed it if only he knew how. I think it’s a pretty message and relatable. Shit happens, and you never know how to handle every situation.”

At the time you didn’t hear it, but he lets out a breath and then just smiles at you. “Wow, you really analyze songs a lot.”

You smile sheepishly and drink your soda. “I really like music, so I’m never opposed to listening to new artists.”

“That’s good to know.” He finishes the last of his beer and gets up. “I gotta run, but you enjoy the show.” You wave back about to ask for his name, but he’s already gone.

Not long after, Mila, Kuroo and Kenma show up. The four of you make your way to the front, and since you were there early, everything worked out. “Gahh I’m so excited Sweetie!”

“Me too! I’m so excited for Taro.” You and Kuroo fist bump and wait impatiently.

An MC comes out on stage to introduce. “How are all you gorgeous people doin’ tonight.” There’s a bunch of woo’s and yea’s coming from the crowd. “I won’t take up too much of your time, so first up we got Taro-” the crowd screams, you and Kuroo are among them. “Alright settle down, he’s performing four songs for you today. Then The Jackals will come in as your main set.”

Everyone claps and waits for the MC to finish. “Without further ado… make some noise for TARO!”

You and Kuroo are screeching, clapping your hands together. Taro comes out in some chains, a mesh shirt which has everyone going apeshit, sneakers, and a bucket hat. Everyone’s still screaming by the time he gets to the mic. “Alright, shut up you fucks.”

Everyone laughs and a few people scream ‘we love you Taro!’

He laughs into the mic and nods. “Yea I love you guys too. Now let’s get this going, what song are we thinking?”

Your mouth moves before you could even think. “PSYCHO!” You screech, but then get embarrassed after realizing how loud you were.

He laughs again, grabbing the mic off the stand and squats down in front of you. “Fitting, since you’re all a bunch of little psychos.” He rubs the top of your head with his hand and gets up. “Let’s get it.”

You die internally because holy shit, Taro touched you. You don’t have time to bask in it though because his number starts and you and Kuroo need to go crazy for it. He starts, “Yea my AP goin’ psycho…”

Taro’s numbers are to die for and everyone is having a great time. Before you know it, he’s on his last song of the night. “It’s been fun you guys, so let’s end it with Stay.”

You want to cry because that’s all you wanted. When he gets to the chorus, you and Kuroo yell, “but don’t count on me to stay!”

Taro finishes up and you’re sad to see him go. “Thank you Chicago! I’ll miss my hometown. We’ll see each other soon.” He winks at the crowd and you all cheer him off.

The MC comes back as the people behind him change up the set. “Alright, and our main set. Everyone, please welcome in The Jackals!” Mila is jumping and yelling while Kenma is just clapping, but he has this big smile on his face. You go to tie your shoes since someone stepped on your laces and undid them.

When The Jackals come up, the lead singer steps in front of the mic while the other three set up. “Hey everyone, if you don’t know,” you recognize the voice and you stand back up so quickly only to see the lead singer, the man you talked to at the bar looking down at you. “I’m Atsumu, the lead singer, that’s Shoyo on guitar, Kiyoomi on bass, and Kotaro on drums.” You stand unmoving, completely lost. How could you not know. “Now, I know we were gonna open with Starboy, but I’ve been convinced to start with Hardest to Love so enjoy this everyone.”

He smiles in your direction, and this does not go unnoticed by your roommate. “Sweetie, what in the hell happened.”

You stood there, still shocked. “All I did was make fun of his beer.”

Atsumu starts, “You try with me so many times…”

Regardless of anything, Atsumu had a wonderful voice that hit every note you could think of. High, low, whatever, he could do it. You didn’t know, but The Jackals knew he was showing off and just smirked to themselves.

Once he finishes he moves on. “Did you guys like that?” The crowd howls at him making him smile and chuckle. “We’ve got 8 more songs, let’s make this count, yea?” Everyone is excited and pumped up.

You try to enjoy the songs, but how can you when he’s looking at you so intensely. You decide to ignore it and have a fun time with your friends.

The last song comes up and it’s Cough Syrup, you haven’t listened to it so you decided to pay attention to the lyrics. It’s a great song, it helps slow down the fast tempo everyone was cheering at and is a great closing number. You make eye contact with Atsumu, a blush appears on your face but you refuse to look away.

Still, it doesn’t help that he’s looking at you with a grin on his face singing into the microphone. You can’t help it that he looks so incredibly attractive while doing it. It’s not your fault.

The music slows and Atsumu sings the last line, “One more spoon of cough syrup, now woah.” Everyone’s cheering and clapping while the band all gets on one knee and thanks everyone.

“Thank you Chicago, yer always my best crowd. Just tell Taro that yer all my hometown.” The crowd laughs and claps to the singer, he pushes his hair back with a hand, sweat prominent on his features. “Love ya.”

“We love you!” Everyone yells back at him. He smiles and waves goodbye, then everyone goes on their own way.

Atsumu is still there looking at you, he mouths to you ‘come backstage with your friends.’ You nod, unable to do anything else. “Hey guys, follow me.” They all do without question.

When you get to their room, there’s a man in front of the door. “You are?” He asks.

“Um, I’m y/n, Atsumu said to come back here.” He nods and opens the door for you. It’s all the band members sitting on the couch and Taro, except for Kiyoomi who’s in the shower.

“Sweetie! Hi.” He kisses the side of your cheek to welcome you and you’re taken aback, but don’t say anything of it. “Yer all her friends?”

Mila is frozen, her dreams coming true all at once. “Mila.” She says pointing to her self. The Jackals and Taro chuckle at her while Atsumu shakes Kuroo’s and Kenma’s hands.

“It’s nice to meet you all.” You say nodding your head in their direction.

Suna gets up and rubs your head. “You’re the psycho girl.”

“What?” Atsumu asks confused and your cheeks flush bright red.

“She asked me to play Psycho really loud. Good choice by the way.” You thank him for his music and Kuroo begins to engage in conversation with him.

Mila and Kenma somehow get talking to Shoyo and Kotaro in the meantime. “Cat got yer tongue?” Atsumu teases.

You roll your eyes, your previous nervousness fleeing, it’s just something about him. “Please, I was just feeling nervous.”

He chuckles at you. “Did ya like the show?”

“Yea, Taro was great, your voice broke a couple times though.” You tease back.

“What, there’s no way-” your laugh cuts him off and he pouts. “Not funny.”

You smile and pat his shoulder. “I think you did great, really. I liked all of the songs.” You’re staring at each other for too long and there’s just something there that you can’t deny.

He leans in to whisper in your ear, sending chills down your spine. “Would ya like to come over to my apartment?” You don’t want to get too attached to a singer, but you wouldn’t be opposed to it either. A night with him and maybe a little more doesn’t seem like a bad idea at all.

“Alright.” You smile.

Despite common stereotypes, Atsumu was a gentleman above all else. He made sure you were comfortable, gave your roommate his address in case she wanted to go check on you, and asked if you were alright all the time.

“If I wasn’t ok, I would’ve kicked you and ran away with your car.” He chuckles and continues to change the gear on his car. “What’s it’s name again.”

He revs the engine. “Aran.”

“Ohh, where’d you get that name from?” You ask.

Atsumu shifts in his seat a bit and comes to a stop at a red light. “My brother and I used to live in a pretty bad neighborhood, and Aran was our friend. He was older than us so he and another guy named Shin were like family to us along with Rintaro.” He sighs and puts the car into gear to drive. “Anyway, when we were 17 Aran joined the army to help support his family, but he ended up in a crossfire and passed away.”

There was a lump in your throat and you weren’t sure what to say. “I’m glad I got to meet one Aran then.”

You thought he was going to stare you down but he just laughed. “Me, too. He was awesome.”

“I didn’t really live in the greatest place either, lots of kids I knew went to join the army, but I never heard if they were ok.” You fiddle with your hands a bit.

He asks, “Where did you live?”

“I grew up in the orphanage not too far from the venue you were at. I met all my friends there. They kind of kick you out as soon as you’re 16.” You shrug.

“Damn.” Atsumu says. “What’ve you been doin’ since then.”

“Work to live?” The two of you chuckle. “I work at a strip club in the heart of Chicago, I’m a waitress. I can’t dance for shit.”

He laughs at you and you just smile. “That’s good, let me know where and I’ll visit ya sometime.”

“I’m honored that you would pay me such a visit.” You push his shoulder and the two of you laugh together in the car.

You’re about to go down a steep hill but stop at the top. “My apartment is just down there.” He points all the way at the bottom. “We’re gunning it down.”

“Atsumu no-”

“Atsumu yes.” He winks and before you can say anything, you’re rolling down the hill grabbing onto Atsumu’s arm for dear life, eyes locked on the downhill road. You’re yelling and Atsumu is just laughing at you before coming to a hard stop at his place. “We made it.”

You look at him, arms shaking. “I’m gonna kill you.”

He smiles and kisses your cheek. “Chin up, let’s go eat, I’m starvin’.” The small kiss takes you aback, but you hop out of the car and follow him. He holds out his hand and you take it. He leads you up the stairs and into his apartment. “Sorry it’s kinda a mess.” He scratches the back of his head.

There’s papers all over and instruments all over the place, even a picture of him and- “Did you photo shop that?” It was a picture of him and someone who looked just like him on a volleyball court with seven other people

He looks to the picture you point at and laughs. “No, that’s my brother, we’re twins.”

“I feel bad for your mom, you guys must’ve been a handful.” You smile.

Atsumu nods, placing pizza into the microwave, a small smile spreading on his face. “She was great though, never gave up on us.” He looks up and his face drops. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking-”

You hold up a hand and shake your head. “Don’t worry about it, I know you didn’t mean anything by it. Single parents are badass.”

He agrees. “D’ya know anything about yer ma?”

You shake your head. “No, I don’t even know if I want to, you know? It’s been so long, knowing who she is now would just make me so angry.”

The microwave dings and he goes to grab the pizza. “Follow me.” He leads you up yet another flight of stairs, but once you get to a door, the cool Chicago breeze welcomes you and you find yourselves on the attic.

You take in the beautiful view that surrounds you. The lights overwhelmingly yellow and orange, cars driving by, trains, busses, and the beautiful sky, that due to the pollution, only the moon was visible. There were a few stars here and there, ones that never quit. “This is everything. I can’t go back home now that I’ve seen this.”

“Then don’t.” Atsumu shrugs taking a bite of his pizza, offering you a slice. You decline.

You and him sit across from each other on these lawn chairs looking at the sky. When he finishes his slice you turn to him. “Why did you want me to come with you.”

“The truth?” He asks. You nod. “I was really just lookin’ for a nice night, but after talkin’ to ya, I think it’d be safe to say I’m glad I met ya.” Why is it that you’ve only just met and he causes your heart to flutter like this. This was cosmic, you felt it in your bones, and whether or not Atsumu wanted to admit it, he knew that too. Knew that you would be someone special, someone he wouldn’t let himself have, but he ignored all that. “Why did you accept?”

You shrug. “Random hookup didn’t seem like a bad idea. I got swept away by your rocker singer persona or whatever.” He smiles at you and grabs a hold of your hand. You don’t want to ask if he’s looking for a relationship, because you’re scared of the answer. You want him to keep holding your hand just as he is. “Why did you become a singer?”

“It was actually my second dream.” You sit up and turn to face him. “I wanted to become a pro-volleyball player, but our school wasn’t well equipped with training to even get past the first round in a tournament. I didn’t want to burden my ma.”

“For what it’s worth, I think, maybe in another life, you’re doing just that.” He chuckles and squeezes your hand. “Is your dad not in the picture?”

He shakes his head. “Nah. He took off after our fourth birthday. He was shit dad for the time he was there anyway, so I’d like to say we were better off without him.” Atsumu pulls out his phone and plays a song on it. You haven’t heard it before, but you recognize his voice through the speakers. “Dance with me?”

You get up and place your hand on his shoulder and the other in his hand while he wraps his other one securely around your waist. “Which one of your songs is this?”

“Slow Dancing in the Dark. Bokuto wrote it, his boyfriend and him were really goin’ through it at the time.” The two of you dance around the roof. He places you on the ledge and lets you jump onto him as he spins you in his arms.

You laugh and sway with him again. “You’re quite the charmer. You do this with a lot of girls?”

He shakes his head. “Nah, most of them don’t talk to me as much as you have.” He smiles.

“I like how open you are.” You blurt out, but it’s already out there. “I dunno, it just makes other people more comfortable to be real with you.”

“I never got anything from being a liar. I guess that’s just how I am. How do you get me to talk so much Sweetie? You haven’t talked much about yerself.”

“You haven’t asked.” You teased and he places you on his lap as you sit back down.

“What’s yer dream Sweetie?” He smiles and keeps you guys moving.

You hum and just wonder if maybe it was too deep to share, but he’s been so honest with you, you feel like you could tell him. “To have a family of my own. To never abandon them and make sure they know I love them with all my heart.”

“That’s a pretty dream.” You smile and rest your head on his shoulder, you two dance till the music stops.

You wake up the next morning next to Atsumu on his bed. Memories from the night hit you like a bus and you want to squeal. He was sweet all the way through. You try to gather your thoughts but it was all scrambled with the fact that you slept with the lead singer of a band. You gotta cross that off a list somewhere.

Atsumu moves and he wakes up, looking at you holding the sheets up to your chest. “Mornin’.” He greets and you mutter a small hi as you shrink into the bed. “Ah, don’t be shy now. I’m gonna go make breakfast.”

You pull a shirt of his and some boxers out to wear and you make your way to the kitchen. He sees you come in and smiles while turning his head to the side. “I hope you don’t mind.” You refer to the stolen clothes.

He waves you off and continues to cook up some wonderful breakfast. “How d’ya like yer eggs?”

“Scrambled please.” He smiles cooking that right up. “How’d you become such a great cook.”

“My brother owns a restaurant.”

You nod. “Yea, I think he’d be disappointed if you didn’t know how to cook.” The two of you chuckle together and he places the egg on your plate.

“Any plans today?”

You think for a moment before groaning. “Yea, Mila and I work from 6pm to 1am today.”

Atsumu perks his head up and smiles. “I’ll bring the guys then, visit you on the job.”

You laugh and agree. “Ok, I’ll see you there then.”

The two of you eat breakfast together before he drops you off at your house, still in his clothes. “See ya later tonight.” He winks, and all you can do is smile and wave as he drives off. Before you can turn back around, Mila pulls you inside and up the stairs.

She sits you down on the couch and stares at you. “Alright, explain.”

“Well, he was really nice, we danced, talked and… well you know, then he made me breakfast and drove me back here, oh and he’s coming to our job later with his friends.” You tell.

Her mouth is stuck wide open, unable to move. “Oh my- how do you do that. Well now I’m nervous to go to work. I think he likes you y/n.”

“I don’t think that’s what he’s looking for Mila.” You get up and head to your room.

She laughs and shakes her head. “Well someone better tell him you don’t dance and be all sweet to your friends with benefits.”

“I don’t think that’s exactly what this is either.” You say.

“Well then it’s a big fat fucking ‘it’s complicated’.” She throws her hands up mumbling to herself about what to wear.

You’d hate to admit it, but you think that’s exactly what this is.

Nevertheless you got ready for your day with Mila. It wasn’t too crowded yet, and you would be lying if you said you weren’t antsy for Atsumu and the rest of them to show up. Mila picked up on it really quick.

“You’re gonna burn a hole in the door looking at it like that.” She quips

Your shoulders sag a little. “Am I that obvious?” You ask her.

“Only to me, Sweetie.” She pinches your cheeks before carrying her tray to her table.

Somewhere during your conversation a new table was sat, and when you went to wait on them you locked eyes with a familiar blonde. Your whole body relaxed, and Atsumu turned to you, a warmth spread throughout his body. Whatever was happening between the two of you was happening fast, and even though Atsumu knew he couldn’t give you more, he was selfish and wanted to have you if not just for another day.

He smiles charmingly at you when you get to the table. “Hello boys.”

“Hi Sweetie,” they all wave to you: Kotaro, Shoyo, and Kiyoomi. Atsumu grabs your hand and kisses it looking up at you. He was taking in the lovely corset you had on with the fishnets.

You blushed deeply, but it was hidden by the bright and colorful lights in the club. “What can I do for you boys?” They give you their orders which you take diligently to the bar.

“See, they got here.” Mila snickers and waves at them from behind the bar. “Let me help you with the drinks.”

The two of you finish them quickly and walk over to drop them on the table. Before you’re able to say anything you feel a quick slap on your ass. Your whole body freezes up and you turn to see a very drunk customer. “No touching,” you seethe.

Mila turns as well, standing next to you as help. “Mmm no, I don’t think that’s what you should say.” The guy walks right up to you and grabs your arm. Immediately another arm shoots out to grab his.

“Hey,” Atsumu says cooly grinning with mal intent. “Why don’t you let go of her arm yea?”

The guy is displeased and raises an arm to which Atsumu’s friends respond quickly by getting up, but he was stopped by Earl, one of the security workers. “Are you alright Sweetie and Mila?”

Mila nods. “Yea this guy needs to go, he’s touching.” She huffs and Earl nods.

“Don’t worry he’ll be gone soon.” Earl disappears with the man out the door and you let out a breath.

“Are you okay?” Atsumu asks, his jaw tight.

You nod breathing in. “Yea, it comes with the job. Earl and Riley are really good at kicking them out if need be.” You smile. “Sit down and relax, don’t worry too much about me.”

“Well that’s not possible.” Atsumu murmurs, but you are already halfway back to the bar with Mila.

“You’re sick Atsumu.” Shoyo says.

Atsumu turns to his bandmate with a wary look. “Huh?”

Kotaro nods in agreement with the guitarist. “You got it bad Atsumu.”

“She’s good. Really good.” Shoyo adds again.

He ignores them and changes the subject. Kiyoomi and the rest of them understand he’s deflecting because he likes you too, but he can’t be with you. He won’t let himself be with you, and that’s exactly what they want him to see, that he can.

Regardless of his distaste for their probing, Atsumu gets his notepad out and scribbles down some lyrics. “You really brought that with you?” Kiyoomi asks pointedly.

Atsumu rolls his eyes at his friend. “I bring it everywhere. I don’t know why you’re surprised. The boys begin conversing about their next upcoming show but Atsumu is watching you. He watches you laugh with Mila and charm the customers that come up to you.

He hasn’t felt this sense of comfort in a long time, but watching you is inspiring in itself. He nudges Bokuto to get his attention. “What’s up?”

“Can you help me with this? I think it’s good.” He refers back to the notepad where he has the title of the song written.

Bokuto hums looking over the lyrics. “Locked Out of Heaven? Sounds good.” He doesn’t comment and how he talks so vividly about you. Even though he hasn’t said it, Bokuto knows. “Instead of cause you got me feelin like to cause you make me feel like, good?”

The two of them fix up some of the wording in the song meanwhile Shoyo called over one of the girls to dance for Kiyoomi. Kiyoomi is glaring at Hinata, but doesn’t shoo the girl away, he’s a gentlemen of course.

Eventually your shifts are up and you come back out wearing some sweats and a hoodie. “All done.” You smile.

Atsumu looks at you with wonder as he takes in your clothes. “No corset? I think I like a girl in uniform.”

“I’m off the clock, mister.” You say teasingly before walking ahead of him and the others following. “What do you want to do?”

He hums stepping closer to you. “Do you like Just Dance?”

Over the course of the next month or so you and Atsumu grew much closer and he released Locked Out of Heaven. While you had a sneaking suspicion it was about you, you never said anything.

You, Mila, Kuroo, and Kenma still attended all of their concerts and the crowds kept getting bigger with each passing show. Atsumu lit up the stage, he was a performer, a great one and he captured everyone’s attention. You really couldn’t help but look at him with stars in your eyes every time.

However, you were getting tired of not understanding where the two of you stood. It frightened you how much you liked Atsumu, how much you could envision him in your future. It scared you not knowing if he thought of you like you thought of him.

That’s why you were standing outside his apartment and knocking on the door. He answered quickly and leaned on the door frame. “Hi Sweetie,” he kissed your cheek letting you in. “This is a nice surprise.”

When he closes the door you mumble a hello, but your nerves are at an all time high. He notices something is up and asks, but he already doesn’t like this feeling. To him, the point of not being in a relationship was to not feel this way. Like he was close to fighting with you and losing. “I just... I have a question.” You say looking up at him. “What am I... to you? Do you think about me?”

“I think about you a lot.” He admits, whether he wanted to or not. “What’s going on?”

“It’s just that I think about you all the time. I want you, all the time. More so, I just want to know that you’re with me, that you want me the same way I want you.” Atsumu recoils back from your admission like you shot him.

He shakes his head. “I’m confused.”

You throw your hands up a little frustrated. “I want you Atsumu. In every single way possible. I want your clothes at my apartment, I want to keep an extra toothbrush here. I want to go on dates with just you and me not in the house, I just want to hold your hand and I want to be together... officially together. I love-” You can barely get it out, but when you look at Atsumu’s face the words die on your lips. “What?”

“No.” He says sternly. “I never- when did you ever get the idea that that’s what this was?”

Your chest hurts in the worst possible way. This is not the way you expected this to turn out. “You can’t look at me the way you do and not expect me to think you love me too.”

Atsumu runs a hand through his hair and looks equally as upset as you are right now. “No you’re completely off the mark. This- this is not what that is. You need to get your delusions in check.”

You scoff getting angrier as the seconds pass. “It’s not delusions when even your friends say the same thing.”

His head shoots up at you. “What the fuck did they say to make you think that?”

“That they’ve never seen you happier, that you seem lighter and like you’re finally able to let someone love you instead of thinking you can’t.” You spit out at him.

“Well they fucking lied to you.” He grits.

You shake your head. “You’re insane Atsumu. I know you love me too. Why is it such a fucking problem for you to admit that?”

“Because it’s not fucking true, Sweetie. I don’t know how you deluded yourself into that-”

“Don’t call me fucking crazy, I’m not fucking crazy.” You stand up from the couch and walk over to him. “You can’t touch me the way you do and look at me like you do and say you don’t care about me. I won’t let you lie straight to my fucking face.”

“I don’t want a relationship, I don’t want this. I don’t want the expectations that come with this.”

It grabs your attention as you laugh humorlessly. “Yea Atsumu, I expect you to love me fucking back, that’s so much to ask for though with you isn’t it.”

He buries his hands in his hair ruffling it. “This is exactly what I’m talkin’ about! I don’t want this fighting, we’re not even together, shit. We’re not together!”

“I think I understand that very well. Why won’t you let me love you Tsum?” You whisper.

“Because I don’t fucking want it, I don’t want you, I don’t want an us, I’ve made myself pretty fucking clear.”

“Loud and clear. Especially when I’ve just admitted that I love you and you throw shit in my face.” You retort.

He sighs, “Shut up Sweetie, please.”

“The day I do is the day I stop caring about you, Atsumu.” He’s frustrated because he doesn’t know how to explain this to you and he doesn’t want to.

“Just go. Just fucking leave.”

“I’m not leaving this goddamn apartment until you tell me you don’t love me!” You say, tired and desperate. “Do you love me Atsumu?”

He shakes his head. “I don’t wantcha to love me.”

You recoil and cross your arms. “But do you love me, please? I don't think that’s much to ask.”

He doesn’t have it in him to say it, but he cannot stand you to be here a second longer. “News flash, Sweetie. It’s not that hard to not fall in love with you. You should have learned that by now.” He went real low, even knows it from the way your face falls and you lose the fight you had in you. His chest tightens from the look you give him. “The door is right fuckin’ there. I didn’t think you were so dense, fuck!”

“Don’t fucking talk to me like that!” You yell back. “All I wanted Atsumu-” you choke on a sob. “All I really wanted, was to know that someone fucking loved me for once.” You say as a whisper. “And that-” you sniffle, wiping your tears, “that you knew loving you isn’t a chore, it was a goddamn fairy tale. Even now. Even as you push me away and tell me you hate me, I still love you.” You leave, deciding that Atsumu isn’t hard to love at all, but he makes it hard to stay.

When the door shuts and he can no longer hear your footsteps, Atsumu throws the remote control at his wall. “Fuck!”

You don’t hear from him since then, and Mila had her work cut out for her. Knowing that the singer from her favorite band did this to her best friend is something she wouldn’t stand for.

She blocked all of their numbers from both of your phones. Even though the other boys didn’t do anything she had to be extra sure he had no way of contacting you. Kuroo and Kenma were let in on the whole thing too.

As you nursed your broken heart Mila held onto you as you tried to explain what he said, and that really solidified her hatred for the man. “That is not true Sweetie. I’ll love you till the day I die.” She kissed the top of your head as you cried yourself to sleep.

Kuroo and Kenma visited too and she let them in on what happened. “Why would he-”

“I have no idea. I think he just wanted to hurt her, because I don’t believe for one second that he wasn’t in love with her.” The three of them nod in agreement as they witnessed Atsumu with you first hand. “He’s just a fucking idiot.”

“You’re a fucking idiot.” Kiyoomi chimes in after listening to Atsumu’s rant about what happened with you weeks ago. They all asked where you had went, and with enough probing they got it out of him.

Atsumu looks shocked. “She’s delusional.”

Bokuto shakes his head. “She would be if she wasn’t right. She’s right, Atsumu and in your heart of hearts I know you know that. I know you know that you’re also in love with her.”

The singer groans. “Not you guys too.”

“I think you’re just in denial because then you would have to face the fact that you treated her disgustingly awful.” Kiyoomi says. “For some unknowing reason she fell in love with you. I think this is where your luck runs out Atsumu, because you’re never going to meet someone like that again.”

All of them are shocked at how much Kiyoomi was saying all at once. He normally was quiet, but you and the bassist developed a nice friendship, which was saying a lot for Sakusa.

“He’s not wrong Atsumu.” Hinata breaks the silence. “The quicker you realize that, then the faster you can beg for her forgiveness, because I don’t think you’ll get her back with anything less.”

The boys get up to set up their instruments leaving Atsumu in their dressing room to wonder how he got here in the first place. He felt so many things all at once and he turned to his notepad, because he couldn’t express himself in any other way.

He performed with group and charismatic as he may be, they noticed how off he was. At one point during the show he slipped up the lyrics to one of the songs. “Shit...” he laughs it off. “Maybe I’m just a little fucked up guys I’m sorry.” The crowd cheers him on regardless, but he finds himself looking for your face. A glimpse of it somewhere, and the disappointment burns him in a way he has never experienced.

Once the set finishes he goes back to his notepad, ignoring the stares his friends give him. He looks at Bokuto with a knowing look. The drummer sits down and pats his back. “What do you need help with?”

The two of them get to writing together, although it was mostly Atsumu’s words Bokuto helped clean it up. Atsumu was always good at understanding his emotions when they were on a piece of paper, but how could he go after what he really wanted. Every relationship he ever had crashed and burned, just like yours did and it didn’t even have a label on it.

But that was his mistake.

You were never just going to be another girl to him. He loved you more than he cared to admit. So much that it ached. So much that he couldn’t bear how fast his heart beat around you and he had to burn you too. He was most definitely the problem.

You just wanted an unconditional love, and he did love you, but could he love you the way you deserved? Was it fair that he decided these things for you? Probably not.

He wasn’t sure how he was going to get you to meet with him. After what he said he wouldn’t want to either, but he picked up his phone and tried to call. “The number you’re trying to reach...” Yea. He should’ve expected that one.

He tried Mila’s and the same thing happened. The same thing would happen with your other friends’ numbers. “Shit.” He clicks his tongue but then turns his attention to Kiyoomi. “Hey, Omi-”

“Don’t even try.” He said tuning his bass not even looking up. “She’s blocked all of us, all of them did. Not that I really blame her.”

Atsumu nods, but decides this is just a little bump in the road. He needs to plan everything anyway, it would be silly to ask for you back without one. He needed to plan.

Over the next few days he booked a venue, the same one you met at. He donated what he could to the orphanage you grew up in. In the hopes that the children live a little better than you did. He doesn’t really plan on telling you that one.

It was difficult for him, the band was in the middle of a life changing contract, but his priorities were set for the first time in his life. He pleads his bandmates to help him, and they accept because you deserve to have a choice on whether or not you get to be with the person you love.

He goes to the strip that you work out and hopes to run into you, but he’s met with Mila, a more formidable opponent. She looks up with a smile to greet the new customer, but when she sees him her face drops. “You’ve got about ten seconds to get out before I ask Riley to do it.”

“I just need two minutes.” He asks.

“You don’t deserve any.” She cleans the glasses in front of her not looking at it. “I mean it.”

Atsumu nods. “I know. I know I don’t, but listen to me and if you don’t want to after that then I’ll leave.”

She looks skeptical but relents. You deserve the choice to be with him or not. Not that she believes he deserves it. “Two minutes. Starting now.”

“I didn’t mean it.” He says sheepishly. “Any of it and if I could take it back I would. I-” He huffs out a breath, wishing he could talk to you. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt the way I did with her, and I know that she deserved more than I could offer, but I do want her.” His fists clench trying to get out the right words. “I want her more than I have wanted anything, and it scared me and I fucked up I know, but I- well... I love her. Whether I deserve to or not I do. And by some miracle she loves me too... or did.”

Atsumu shakes his head to get back on track, Mila’s full attention is on him as he slips her a flyer and four tickets. “If you could get her to come to this show... I’d owe you everything, regardless of what happens I just don’t want to lie to her anymore.”

Mila peaks at it and watches him leave as he doesn’t wait for her answer. “Fuck.” She mutters. “I hate being a good fucking person.” She snatches the tickets and puts them in her bag.

When she gets home you’re cleaning the house again, something you’ve been doing to keep your mind busy. Mila sets down the take out as she comes to sit on the couch.

“Sweetie guess what.” You pick your head up to look at her. “Taro is coming to town again.”

Your shoulders slump a little and you shrug. “I don’t know, I don’t really want to go.”

“Pleaseeeeee.” She whines. “Kuroo bought us all tickets, he’s the main event. Some randos are opening for him it’ll be fun I promise.” You don’t really know how fun it would be to go back to the place that reminds you of him entirely.

“I’m just not sure it would be good for me.” You say lowly.

Her heart breaks for you, but she is hard to deter. “I promise just this once, if you don’t like being there within the first hour we can go home. Promise.”

In the end, you end up agreeing and Mila fills the boys in on the plan. When Friday hits you all get ready at your apartment Kuroo and Kenma waiting with anticipation.

“You look great Sweetie.” Kuroo coos teasingly and your face heats up.

“I will kill you.” You joke.

Kenma looks up questioningly. “Doubtful.” It earns a small laugh from you which brings a smile to his face.

The four of you make your way to the venue and when you recognize the building of your old home you twitch in discomfort. You don’t voice it though, agreeing to stick it out the hour. Mila is in front and hands the bouncer your tickets while you walk ahead.

It is decently packed, but you wonder why he chose a small venue again with the publicity he has gotten over the month.

“I’m sorry Sweetie, but I’m also not sorry.” Mila smiles, and before you can ask her what she means the lights turn off and you can’t see. Your heart rate picks up, but it slows when the lights of the stage turn on, but the calm is short lived when you see him and the rest of the band on the stage.

“Hi everyone.” Atsumu waves and tries to find you in the crowd. “Now, I’ve recently written a new song yea? It’s the last one of the night.” The crowd howls with excitement and Atsumu loves the thrill it gives him, but he’s still just looking for you, he made sure you would get here for the last one. “My brothers obviously helped me produce it. It explains what words couldn’t, and I wish I was better at expressin’ myself than I actually am. I’m pretty shit at it.” He chuckles into the mic, his voice sending a chill down your spine when his eyes meet yours. “This is Leave Before You Love Me, everyone.”

Your heart is beating so fast that you barely paid attention to the first verse, but the chorus hits you like a truck and reminds you of your first meetings with Atsumu.

'Cause my wheels are rolling Ain't taking my foot off the gas And it only took the one night To see the end of the line Staring deep in your eyes, eyes

You remember when he sent it down the hill near his apartment. How you held onto him and regardless of how nervous you were you felt safe as long as he was there.

Dancing on the edge, 'bout to take it too far It's messing with my head, how I mess with your heart If you wake up in your bed, alone in the dark I'm sorry, gotta leave before you love me

The rest of the song plays out and you wrap your arms around yourself for some sense of comfort. Your friends notice it and huddle around you to try to ease the listen.

When the final chorus plays theres cheers all around you, and you can’t seem to move from your spot even as Atsumu smiles at you and gestures for you. Mila grabs your hand and you turn to her. “If you want we can leave right now and never come back.”

You shake your head. “No... I want- I want to know what he has to say.”

She nods and leads you to the back. The rest of the band greets you while you can barely mutter a hello. They all leave you with him, Mila squeezes your hand before she also heads out.

Atsumu had a whole bunch he wanted to say, but he wasn’t so sure any of it did justice to you. He slowly walks up to you and places his hands gently on your face to have you look at him. “I’m sorry, Sweetie. I’m so sorry.”

“You were so mean.” You whisper.

He nods. “I know. I didn’t mean it. Any of it. I know that doesn’t make it better, but that’s the truth.” He sighs as he runs a hand through your hair. “I just thought I shouldn’t lie to you anymore. I want you. More than I ever that I could and that was so fucking scary. But you didn’t deserve that at all. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I wasn’t so terrible all the time-”

You shake your head. “You’re not terrible Atsumu, just delusional, to think that you don’t care about me.”

“I love you.” Your throat closes up and you’re not sure what to say after that. “I think I’ve loved you from the moment I’ve met you. You’re everything, Sweetie. Everything I don’t deserve and everything I shouldn’t have.” He places his forehead against yours. “But it wasn’t fair of me to not give you a choice, because you should have one and I took that from you.”

“I’m always going to choose you, Atsumu.” Fresh tears make their way to your eyes as you take in a shaky breath. “But everything isn’t going to magically be better just because you’ve realized this. What if we get into a disagreement and you blow up on me. I can’t survive it again.”

He nods understanding your concern. “I’ve been going to therapy.” Your head shoots up almost knocking his nose. “I know, long overdue. It’s easy to tell myself you should be with someone better, but I want to try to be that for you. To be someone deserving of your kindness,” he kisses your cheek. “Deserving of your love. Although I don’t think I ever will, I want to get as close as I can.”

You laugh at his statement. “You were always enough for me, Atsumu, but I’m glad you’re getting help.” You take a deep breath before going on. “It’s not always going to be easy.”

“I know.”

“I might get frustrated with you.”

“I know.”

“You might get frustrated with me.”

“I know.”

“But I think as long as we’re honest and truly love each other...” You trail off. “I think we could make it.”

“I’ll always pick you. There is no other choice for me.”

You smile brushing your lips against his, feeling relaxed in his hold. “We go slow this time.”

“Whatever you want. We’ll do. I just want to be able to hold you.”

“It was a great song.” You add.

He nods kissing your forehead. “It was about a great person. That and Locked Out of Heaven.”

You laugh under your breath. “I knew it.”

Atsumu rolls his eyes playfully looking down at you. “Assume from this day forward that every song, every word, every thought, and every breath I breathe is about you.”

You can’t top that so you quietly retreat into his arms, safe and loved. “I want lots of kids.”

“We’ll have all the kids you want. I’ll have fun trying.”

The two of you laugh together before taking a moment to join your friends again who by the looks of it are happy for you. “Don’t mess up this time Atsumu.” Kiyoomi warns.

You walk up to the bassist and give him a hug, you do this with all of them. “I missed you guys.”

You all walk out together and you get into Atsumu’s car so he could take you back to his apartment. It’s quiet on the ride back but he holds your hand the entire time.

When you get there he immediately takes you to the roof. “Bo and I made this new song not too long ago. It’s called Die for You.”

He plays the song on his speaker and takes a hold of your hand dancing with you like he did that very first night. “You always have beautiful penmanship.”

He smiles shyly. “Trying to get that into actual words.”

“I believe in you.” You rest your head on his shoulder and sway with him.

You’re not sure how long you stay there dancing for, but you really wouldn’t have minded staying till the morning, and Atsumu wouldn’t have either.

Atsumu is not hard to love. Not in the slightest, and he’s starting to believe that for the first time in a long time.

A/N: I hope this isn’t too bad LMAO

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gretakatharinaa · 6 months

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everything is wired - about dreaming

What do our dreams actually say about us? Do they have meaning or hidden messages?

I'm sure you have had a rather questionable dream one night and spent the morning with similar questions.

To really understand dreams and what they mean, I dug deep and i'm ready to give you the shortest of summaries.

I know every person has different opinions about where dreams come from and what they mean or even if they mean anything at all.

So, in my digging, i've assembled all sorts of information.

To put it simply, our brain doesn't rest when we do. Once we fall asleep, our brain finally gets to work without our silly little thoughts interfering.

This process is called Memory Consolidation.

Dreams are believed to contribute to the consolidation or memories, organizing and storing information acquired during wakefulness.

- Think of it as a shopping Haul. You've been out all day, shopping god knows what (for god knows how much) and then, once you get back home you unpack everything you've bought, take off the tags and store it somewhere in the depths of your (probably already overflowing) closet.-

Essentially, our brain is having a mega haul with all the experiences since the last time you slept. And with that, when it's deciding what goes from short to long term memory, it also pulls out other stuff, older stuff, older memories and maybe even old dreams that were so memorable that you brain decided, once you rest, to include it in your long term closet haul.

So now, at night, while you entered REM sleep, your brain is sorting through the meals you've had, the people you saw, the names you read on your phone or on a billboard, the colors of the city, the background music at the cafe and everything else you've absorbed, you begin to dream.

So, now you might ask: Why, when my brain is sorting through my very real daily experiences, do i sometimes dream about the most illogical and crazy things that makes absolutely zero sense?

Well, i told you i dug deep, so bear with me:

The Prefrontal Cortex, associated with decision making and logical thinking, shows reduced activity during dreaming, which might explain the illogical nature of (some) dreams.

So last night, when i dreamt about DNA reconstructing glasses that you pull over the back of your head (I wish i were kidding), it wasn't me going mental, it was just about Frontal Lobe Inactivity. Well, maybe both.

From inactivity to above average activity: Your Limbic System, responsible for emotions (and the reason why you might miss your silly ex) is highly active when dreaming, influencing the emotional content of dreams. Some people wake up after a dream and can't shake off the way it made them feel for the whole day.

Studies have shown that there is a small percentage of women who have dreamt of being pregnant -but then waking up only to find out that there is no baby- and felt extremely abandoned and depressed the following day; mourning for a baby that was never real.

So with that being said, yes, dreams aren't real, but then again, what are they, if not real?

You see them, you hear them, you feel them, sometimes even after waking up, so just because it only happened in your head, doesn't mean it's not real at all.

My DNA reconstructing glasses are definitely not in store yet, but as they lived in my brain, they are a part of reality.

So, if i haven't bored you yet, here come the answers to the questions i've asked.

This is what dreams are, what they do:

Reflection of Emotions: Dreams often reflect our emotional state and unresolved feelings.

Subconscious Desires and Fears: They may reveal hidden desires, fears, or concerns stored in the subconscious.

Problem-Solving: Dreams can aid problem-solving by processing information and experiences.

Symbolic Language: Dreams use symbolic language, requiring interpretation to understand their meaning.

Memory Consolidation: They may assist in consolidating and organizing memories from the day.

Creative Inspiration: Dreams can inspire creativity and provide unique insights.

Mind Processing: Dream content may represent the brain's way of processing daily experiences and emotions.

What I'm trying to say is: Do not push your dreams aside with a simple: "It's just a dream, it doesn't mean anything"

It might not mean "text your ex" or "find out if you can actually fly" but it means something.

While at times the meaning is abundantly clear, some dreams leave us with wonder and confusion.

I say, observe your dreams and thought and see if there is a pattern, a motive.

And buy my DNA glasses!

#dream #dreamcore #prefrontal cortex #limbic system #rem

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1-1-s1ay-2-2 · 1 year

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I'm happy today because last night, while I slept, I dreamed for the first time in a long time. I dreamt of my twin flame. I saw him as clear as day...but it was night. I was standing outside in the dark under the moonlight, as if I had been talking with someone but no one was there whom I could see -- typical dream style -- and when I turned to my right, there he was standing by my side...smiling sweetly at me...and then, he said something.

In my dream, I understood even though after waking up, I didn't know what he said, probably hello or something, so I replied, and we both smiled and embraced...and then we strolled along together just talking. He walked right up to me in the middle of oblivion and spoke to me and then we walked hand-in-hand...and there was nothing quite as beautiful and comforting as seeing his face in the midst of darkness. It was a hopeful and friendly face that appeared under the light of the moon. A face I knew but hadn't met yet. I face I'd been waiting to see since...I believed in love again. I didn't want the dream to end. But it did.

I woke up after that, but it was in the middle of the night, so I fell back asleep with grace. It felt peaceful to know that even while I slept, God was watching over me and giving me a message about true love...a text from heaven!

Thank You, God and Jesus Christ and Holy Spirit and all the Angels in Heaven. Thank you for blessing us with dreams while we sleep!

#dreaming of hope #explained

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lastnightsterror · 10 months

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Last night I dreamt I was killed by a copy cat creature

I was at my girlfriend's house, we hang out every Wednesday so that was fine. She was just in a weird mood though. She kept making strange out of place comments and then laughing off my confusion.

She called her dog the wrong name, she loves her dog! She started to brush her hair and I asked if I could do it. That isn't weird for us, it's normal for her to sit in front of me and let me brush her hair. It's soft and I find it relaxing. But she just looked at me like I was a weirdo so I apologized.

Things like that continued to happen and I genuinely felt like I was going crazy, maybe I'd dreamed up all those habits? It didn't really matter, over all we still laughed together and had fun. She offered for me to spend the night and for some reason it made my gut sink. I didn't know why but I ignored it and agreed, sleep overs are always fun.

While hanging out she kept getting hungry, we ate almost every hour. I couldn't eat anymore and usually she struggles to eat without both of us eating at the same time but she wasn't having that issue. She was hungry and she would eat anything.

After we laid down I just closed my eyes to try and fall asleep. I felt her get out of bed and assumed she was going to the bathroom. When she took way longer then usual I got out of bed to check on her and maybe make fun of her.

I made my way down the hallway, I looked at the bathroom door but it was wide open with no one inside so I continued on towards where her kitchen would be. I was about to flick on the light before I heard a strange growling sound. I peaked around the corner to see if something got in the house.

She was hunched over the fridge eating raw beef from the package. There were other food containers destroyed and tossed to the ground. The tile was covered in blood, maybe from the raw meat she was tearing into.

It took me a moment before I realized it wasn't quite her. She was skinny as a twig, her spine jutting out through her skin anywhere where it was visible. She just seemed stretched, her back hunched up high enough to be visible over the fridge door. Her arms were long enough he elbows were touching the ground while her thin fingers stuck into the raw ground beef.

I gasped. I regretted it immediately but I gasped. Her head slowly raised, her stretched out neck crackled as it struggled to hold her skull up. Her mouth was agape, her teeth were all different lengths but all of them more then 2 inches. They were thin and dripping in meat and blood. I tried to run back to the room. What would that have done anyway? I'd just be cornered there anyway.

I guess it didn't really matter that she was so fast, that she caught me right away. I was tackled to the ground and my phone fell out in front of me. I screamed as I felt claws holding my shoulders down and before I could beg blunt dug into my back. I don't know why I didn't notice it before but I had tons of messages I didn't see. All from my girlfriend.

"Good morning"

"Are we still hanging out today?"

"Are you okay?"

"Where are you?"

"Your mom said you left the house already where are you?"

"I'm getting worried"

Tons of messages in this tone.

I tried so hard to reach the phone. In my mind if I could then I'd be able to call her and she'd rescue me. I could feel that it had dug deep enough it reached my spine and in one bite my entire body was rushed with more pain then I'd ever felt in my life as this creature crushed my spine in its horrible teeth. I couldn't feel my legs anymore. I screamed and cried and begged for help, I don't know from who.

I woke up sobbing my eyes out, I couldn't feel my legs properly for about 10 minutes after waking up and my back hurt. I could feel the blood on my skin. My blood. It took me a while to get together the courage to pick up my phone and sit up to get out of bed. I'm alright though, on with the day!

I get to go see barbie today so I have something exciting to help me get out of bed

#dream #nightmare #my writing #spilled thoughts #writing #memtal illness

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demonsandmischief · 3 years

Text

Something Special

Marvel - Bucky Barnes Imagine

Bucky Barnes x Female Reader,

Soulmate AU

1.6k Words

You can meet your soulmate in your dreams but you can't speak to them and you lose most memory when you wake up, but for some reason your soul mate has never met you there. You're certain they don't exist, until one day.

A/N: I imagine this taking place during TFATWS :).

----

"What do you mean you've never met your soulmate in your dreams?" Sam Wilson asked his friend Bucky.

"I have nightmares, Sam. That is no place for them to be," Buck argued, taking a rag to wipe the blood off of his vibranium arm.

"But they probably think you're dead."

"It's just better off that way," the stoic man finished, his steely eyes meeting Sam's.

"I don't think you're willing to admit that you are scared to try," Sam said, his voice dropping to a softer tone as he leaned forward.

Bucky sighed. "Of course I'm scared. I am not what anybody wants for a lifelong partner," he whispered, dragging his flesh hand down his face.

"Bucky, that's not your choice to make." He stood up, walking away to let him think it over.

Bucky had heard stories of how people meet their soulmate in dreamland. It was a common occurance, but when he had first tried during World War II, he never got a response. There was no way he could even have one now. He was 106 years old after all.

Yet, when he went to bed that night, he decided to push his thoughts aside and focus on calling for you.

You had been waiting for your soulmate to meet you, but it had been years and never once did you hear anything back. You just figured you didn't have one.

Until that night as you were drifting to sleep, it was like a tingling sensation that drew you in. Your eyes were closed, yet it was like following a rope deeper into the darkness of your head.

At the end, was a man. He was tall and stern, and even though you were dreaming, you could feel his presence.

His facial expression remained masked when he saw you, but even you could see his dark eyes widen slightly. You couldn't believe it, after all this time. You searched his body for any distinguishable features, but only found a blurring image. It was going too fast and you were already waking up.

Bucky couldn't believe he saw you on his first try. Plus, seeing you meant no nightmares. Instead, he had a new longing to look for you, and when he woke the following morning he scrambled to write something down before he lost it.

"Shit," he groaned miserably, only managing to write down brown eyes. Most of the population has brown eyes.

"Someone's in a mood," Sam grinned when he caught sight of Bucky's deep frown, deeper than usual that is. He took another bite of toast. "We've got to move on this next lead. Be ready in five."

"Seriously, what's up with you?" Sam asked genuinely when they both were on the plane ready for their next destination.

"I took your advice-"

"Wait, wait. You took my advice?" Sam smiled widely.

"Yeah I took your advice," Bucky said sharply. "And I saw my soulmate, but I can't remember anything about her."

"You know that's just part of the gimmick. You'll figure out a way, Buck," he said sincerely, standing up.

Bucky couldn't be sure. If he dragged this out for too long, there was a possibility that you would find out who he was and never want to meet him. He wouldn't blame you for that.

---

You felt like you were floating in clouds the whole day. For your entire life, you had seen people meet their person, and as you got older, you realized that the chances of you not having that were becoming greater than actually meeting them.

You didn't know what had changed, but you spent the entire day trying to come up with a plan to finally meet the handsome man you saw in your dreams.

You couldn't remember much. You tried to write or sketch him when you woke up, but all you got was blue eyes.

You wondered if you appeared to him in the same clothes you slept in, and if so, maybe you could fold a note in your pocket. You weren't sure you would even be able to remember it was there. Either way, it was worth a try.

The following night you were so excited you were certain you weren't going to be able to sleep, but you managed, and sure enough there was your broody man.

He gave a wave. His lips twitched up slightly, brightening all of his sharp features.

You reached into the pocket of your sweatshirt. You didn't know why, but you had the longing to do so, and you pulled out a small sheet of paper.

You stepped closer to the man, and placed the paper in his palm.

Y/N, Y/L/N, Your Address

Bucky didn't know how he managed to remember all of that once he woke up. He stared down at the scribbled piece of paper in wonder. Could it really be?

You were probably better off without him. He had not been a good man for most of his life, and you deserved more than him.

That's how Sam found him, sitting on the floor lost in thought, the paper scrunched in his fist.

Bucky relaxed his hand so his friend could see the writing. Sam blew out air, and sat down in front of him.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked as gently as possible.

"She deserves so much better than me."

"You can't decide that for her, Buck. You've kept her waiting long enough." Sam stood up, but spoke once more. "I'll get the plane ready if you change your mind. I think we both deserve a detour."

----

You were on pins and needles the whole day. You truly wondered if your man got the message or not. You could just vaguely remember holding his hand, which means you must have given the paper, but you couldn't be sure. You were just willing someone to knock on your door.

Yet, as the day passed you grew less and less confident. If he remembered the note, surely he would have tracked you down by now. Unless he didn't actually want to track you down. Your thoughts were a swirling mess.

You didn't have any dreams that night. You woke up in cold sweat, a sinking feeling forming in your stomach. You felt nauseous. Was it you who ruined everything? Maybe he knew who you were already and decided to pass.

You weren't sure you had the energy to get up and go to work, but you forced yourself to start moving. Your thoughts were only going to get worse.

----

The two men were quite far from the states and Bucky couldn't stop thinking as they made the long trek. For once, these thoughts were not dark flashbacks, they were a bit hopeful. What if she accepted him?

He felt bad that he couldn't sleep. He desperately wanted to see the girl of his dreams, but it just wasn't going to happen. Even Sam kept unusually quiet.

When they finally landed, it was evening, and the pair parted ways. Bucky would finish the journey alone and he was a nervous wreck, even though all of his emotions remained masked.

When he arrived at the address, he took a deep breath and knocked on the door... except there was no answer. He considered his options. He could have messed up the address, or maybe you gave him a fake one. What was he supposed to do now?

He was so lost in thought, he didn't even notice you pulling in.

Your heart fluttered in your chest as you saw the handsome man standing on your doorstep. All of the dreams you had forgotten came rushing forward.

"Hi," you greeted timidly. He was huge up close, definitely taller than you. He wore mostly black, leather gloves on his hands. His features were sharp and familiar from the dream.

He flashed a nervous smile that only lasted a second before his face went blank once more, "I was worried I had the wrong place."

"Yeah, sorry, I was at work," you said, shuffling a bit as the silence consumed you. You had dreamt of this moment, literally, yet you didn't know what to say.

"I'm Bucky," he said, his tone much softer as he looked at you, soaking you in.

"It's great to finally meet you. I'm Y/N, but you know that," you blushed. "Do you want to come in? I can make dinner or we can order something?"

"Okay," he nodded, following you inside. You realized he was very stern and very observant. Combined with your quiet and shy personality, you were quite a match.

"Do you want something to drink?" you asked from the kitchen, pulling ingredients to throw something together for you both to eat.

"No, but thanks." Bucky sat on the stool by the island unsure of what to say or do, but he enjoyed watching you. There was something very positive about you and your home. It felt good.

"Can I ask about the gloves?" you ask curiously, throwing some chicken in a hot pan.

It seemed like you didn't know who he was. He slowly pulled off his gloves, revealing his metal hand.

"Woah, cool," you said, moving closer. "Can I touch it?"

Bucky furrowed his brows, "I guess."

You couldn't help yourself. It was so smooth and shiny, and you giggled happily.

"I guess you can't feel it," you said, reaching for his flesh hand and tracing just like you were on the metal.

He couldn't have been happier to have the stupid arm at that moment. He loved hearing your laugh, and feeling your fingertips gave him goosebumps. His shadowed mind seemed almost calm in your presence, and he knew just from being around for a short time that you were going to be his addiction.

You dropped his hand, meeting his beautiful blue eyes. Your lips quirked automatically, and you were relieved to know the tension was finally broken.

----

A/N: aw yay I love this. Here's part 2 :))

#bucky barnes #bucky imagine #sebastian stan #marvel imagine #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky x reader #sam wilson #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws imagine #tfatws #soulmate au #bucky barnes soulmate au #james buchanan barnes #bucky fluff #bucky x you #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian Stan #sam wilson imagine

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cozy-the-overlord · 2 years

Text

Orange is the Happiest Color

Summary: “I had a dream that you proposed to me with an orange.”

He chuckled, relaxing back into his pillow. “Did you say yes?”

Word Count: 2,657

Pairing: Loki x Gender Neutral Reader

A/N: So I had a dream about Loki proposing with an orange. I drew this. And then I wrote this. It’s very stupid. I’m not sure I’m happy with it. Here it is. Don’t take it too seriously.

Thanks for reading!

Warnings: None

Tags: @lucywrites02 @gaitwae @whatafuckingdumbass @the-emo-asgardian @imnotrevealingmyname @electroma89 @lokislittlesigyn @moumouton4 @theredrenard @justdontmindmetm @lostgreekgod @naterson

If you want to be tagged, feel free to send an ask/message :)

Read it on Ao3!

“I had a dream that you proposed to me with an orange.”

It was a strange way to begin the morning. Loki raised his eyebrows as he rolled to his side, propping his head up with his hand and studying you with a sleepy sort of amusement. “You dreamt I did what?”

“You proposed with an orange.” The words felt silly on your tongue, but it was still early in the morning, with only the slightest hints of sunlight slipping through the slits in the curtain to where the two of you lay tangled in blankets. It was sleepy enough to be silly. “We were in an orange grove. You opened two halves of an orange like a ring box, got down on one knee, and proposed.”

Loki chuckled, a lazy puff of breath escaping his lips as he relaxed back into his pillow. “Did you say yes?” he asked.

The question caught you off guard. Frowning, you tried to recall. The dream now felt distant and murky, something that faded a bit more with every waking moment spent beyond it. There were little more than still images left behind now—the sweet taste of citrus on the air, Loki’s goofy grin as he knelt before you, the wild wave of ecstasy that crashed through your soul at the realization …

“Yeah, I did.” You smiled. The memory was so warm, like reclining into a hot bath after a long day. “I said yes.”

Loki laughed again and pulled you close against his chest so he could press a kiss to your temple. You snuggled against his sternum, lulled by the steady beat of his heart. The room had gone silent again, a contemplative quiet.

Maybe you shouldn’t have told him the dream. It drifted too close to the unspoken. You and Loki had talked about marriage before, but nothing really beyond vague little allusions back when you had first started seeing each other two years ago. The situation was rather … difficult, you supposed the word was—when one partner’s biology would cause them to outlive the other’s by several millennia, planning for the future wasn’t exactly the optimistic conversation it was often cracked up to be. The two of you had elected to ignore the hulking bilgesnipe in the room and simply enjoy each day as it came. But the topic continued to simmer beneath the surface. Clearly.

Why else would you be dreaming of proposals?

But the two of you would have to wait to jump into a deep dive dream analysis, because the bedroom had barely been quiet a minute before Loki’s Avengers-branded communicator exploded into its usual obnoxious tirade of beeps and buzzes from where it had been exiled to the floor the night before.

Loki groaned, propelling himself to a sitting post even as you continued to cling to his shoulders.

“Can’t you ignore it?” you whined. “Just this once?”

He laughed, attempting to squirm out of your grasp—although you were nearly certain he was only doing so for appearance’s sake, because you both knew well enough that if he wished he could shrug you off with the flick of his wrist.

“If I do, they’ll break down your apartment door in their crusade to drag me there themselves,” he laughed. “And that would make quite the mess of your lovely doormat.”

“Let them try. They’ll have to go through me,” you declared. “I just got you back, and now they’re going to send you away again—”

“It won’t be long—”

“You don’t know that—”

“Darling, I promise—”

“That’s what you said last time.” You pouted, even though you knew you were being childish. It wasn’t Loki’s fault. The terms of his sentence, the terms that kept him out of an Asgardian prison and free to live by your side in the first place, mandated that he must assist the Avengers in any way required, at any point required, regardless of his personal desires. He was their muscle and their errand boy all at once, the red shirts sent in to handle situations too dangerous or too tedious to risk the other Avengers. These missions could take up to a couple of days to a couple of weeks to a couple of months, and often you found yourself left in the dark with no contact with which to determine when he was coming home, or if he was coming back at all. You hated it, and Loki knew it.

He sighed, cupping your chin in his hand even as the communicator continued to spasm on the floor.

“I will return to you, love,” he said. “Regardless of what that device has in store for me. I swear it to you.”

You swallowed. It was hard to stay upset with his sea-green eyes staring so deeply into yours, brimming with such sincerity. “When?”

“Before the week’s out,” Loki smiled, so warmly that you nearly forgot he had no way to guarantee such a statement. “Next Sunday morning I’ll be back here at your side. You have my word.” He leaned forward to give you a kiss, and you drank him in, that wild, woodsy scent that seemed to overwhelm everything else whenever he was nearby. You huffed. It was infuriating how easily he could play the strings of your soul.

“Fine,” you said. “You have a week. Any longer than that and I come looking for.”

Loki grinned. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, darling.”

…

The days ticked by in monotonous fashion. It was strange how quickly the color seemed to seep from the corners of the world when Loki wasn’t about. Your job certainly wasn’t boring—Pepper Potts may have been the most actively normal higher-up at Stark Tower, but she still worked at Stark Tower, and as her personal assistant you found yourself taking notes on the reinforcements necessary to Hulk-proof the outer balconies and updating the budgets to add baby powder for suit chafing. But it was just work—there wasn’t any pizazz, any of the fluttering excitement when you’d run into Loki as you turned a corner, that little smirk tugging on the corners of his mouth as he gave the over-theatrical bow he had developed specifically for you after Stark complained about him behaving “unprofessionally” when you were in the vicinity. You ate on your own and went to bed alone, lying flat on your back to avoid looking at the cold, empty space left behind in his wake.

Pepper would give you updates on his status when she could—there wasn’t much she could say, given how highly confidential everything little thing related to Loki was within SHIELD, but she could tell you that he was alright, that he had met his check in’s, that the mission was coming along fine. You clung to those words the way you clung to Loki’s shoulders, hanging on for dear life as you willed him to come home soon.

Pepper had other news for you as well, possibly even more confidential than that involving your lover.

“I haven’t told anyone this yet,” she practically whispered in her office. “So if it gets out, I’ll know where it came from. But I have to tell someone—Tony and I are having a baby.”

“Oh, congratulations!” you cried. “That’s really exciting!”

“Thank you.” Pepper Potts wasn’t one you’d ever think to describe as “giddy,” but there was a kind of pure elation radiating from her voice with every word she spoke. “We just found out—it doesn’t feel real, you know. We’ve been trying for so long …”

You were happy for her—you were—but as she continued on you couldn’t help but taste the pinpricks of jealousy on your tongue. She had everything planned, every bit of her future set safely in stone, content to start a family knowing that her husband would be safely by her side. You on the other hand … you could only dream about orange-slice proposals as you waited on bated breath for the person you loved most to return from some secret, dangerous mission classified above your pay grade. You longed for that stability, that safety. You longed for a familiar hand to slip a ring on to your finger.

But did he feel the same way?

Loki loved you. Of that, you were positive—he wouldn’t have remained by your side for so long if he didn’t. But to love you was one thing. To marry you was something entirely different. Would he want to tie himself to a creature whose entire lifespan would make up less than 2% of his? Were the situations swapped, you couldn’t say you would want the same.

It was Saturday night. Loki had promised he would be home by tomorrow, but you weren’t particularly optimistic. You reheated your week-old Digiorno’s pizza for the third time and wallowed in the bleakness staring back at you from your microwave door reflection. It was a tired night, a lonely night. You were ready to huddle under your empty covers and cease to exist for a few hours.

Sigh. Maybe Loki would be back in the morning. Maybe you’d wake up to find him curled up besides you, soft grin on his lips as he studied you through sleepy lids. But you pushed the image away as you climbed into bed. It was better not to get your hopes up.

…

Loki wasn’t in bed when you woke up. It was the first thing you noticed, reaching out across the rumpled sheets before you were even fully awake to find only the smooth cold of an untouched mattress. You heaved another disappointed sigh and rolled over to go back to sleep.

Except … was that something burning?

You sat up with a frown, sniffing. No, not burning … but something was cooking, something buttery and fresh. You glanced towards the door and realized that the light streaming into your room wasn’t just the sunlight, but from a florescent glow slipping in from somewhere down the hall.

What on Earth?

Padding out into the kitchen, you were greeted by a veritable banquet of breakfast—pancakes, waffles, pastries, pitchers of orange juice, steaming maple syrup, vibrant bowls of fruit … and in the middle of all of it was Loki, wearing the stained old plaid apron your mother had given you as he fussed with something on the stove.

“Good morning, darling!” he practically sang as you walked in, blinking at the colossal feast he had somehow managed to cram on to your tiny kitchen counter. “Forgive me, I did try to be quiet—”

Your head was spinning. The whole thing looked like something out of a dream. “When did you get back? And have time for all this?”

“Early this morning. I did promise, after all.” He grinned pulling you into an embrace, so warm and soft and real that you just melted into his arms. You exhaled against his chest.

Loki pressed a kiss against the top of your head. “I wanted to surprise you.”

You laughed, nuzzling against his cheek. Mission accomplished. “I’m so glad you’re back.”

He guided you into your seat, the purity of his excitement something truly infectious. You couldn’t help but beam even as the sheer mass of food he was placing before you overwhelmed your senses. Goodness, there was so much food! How had he the energy to prepare such a spread after a week-long mission?

“Loki, I don’t know where to start!” you giggled as he brought out another tray of blueberry muffins from the oven. “There’s so much!”

“Perhaps something simple and sweet?” Seemingly from thin air, he procured an orange the size of his palm, luscious and vividly ripened.

You cackled. “You didn’t!”

He smirked. “Well, I needed them to make the juice, and I thought since they came so positively recommended …”

You fumbled for a knife to cut the fruit, but he already had one ready for you. You giggled as you accepted it. Silly, romantic Loki. How long had he been planning this for? You imagined him taking notes on a mental grocery list whilst sneaking through a high-security Hydra base.

The knife hit something hard within the orange, so hard that it couldn’t cut through, as if there were some great pit in the middle of the fruit. What the—

Abandoning the knife, you dug your fingers into the cut and pulled the citrus flesh apart as if you were opening an oyster. You gasped. In the center of the fruit, clean of any juice or pith, lay a sparkling ring, two bands twisting together like a pair of undulating serpents encircling a glittering emerald stone.

For a moment you could only stare.

“What is—” You turned back to Loki, only to find him kneeling besides your seat, holding you in his starry-eyed gaze. Your breath hitched.

“Darling,” he whispered. He pressed his hand to your knee. “I know we’ve rather avoided this subject, but I’ve been thinking about it quite a bit lately, and …”

Loki inhaled, an uncharacteristically shaky breath. You, it seemed, had forgotten how to breathe entirely.

“I love you, darling.” The confession was soft, tender, enchanting. He reached out to stroke your cheek, his fingers leaving sparks in their wake. “I don’t know what the future holds for us, but I know that much. I want to be with you, as long as you’ll have me,” he swallowed. “Will you have me? Darling, will you marry me?”

He stared up at you almost anxiously, as if he didn’t know that there was no other possible way you could respond.

“Yes,” you whispered. “Goodness, yes!”

It seemed something straight from your dreams. Loki’s face broke into the most beautiful, joyous smile you had ever seen, and you pounced forward to plant your lips on his. Somehow, this was real. He was here, and he was yours, and he wanted you to be his. Forever. You kissed him, basking in the beauteous glow of the moment, hoping it would never end.

Loki was the first to pull away, but it was only to pluck the ring where it rested on the orange and slip it on to your finger, a perfect fit. It made you giggle, to think of where all of this found its beginning.

“Were you always going to propose?” you asked. “Or did you do it just because of my dream?”

He blushed. “If I’m to be entirely honest, darling, I gave you the dream.”

“What?”

Loki glanced down, cheeks an adorable shade of pink. “I wanted to see how you might receive the prospect of a proposal,” he said, interlacing his fingers with yours. “But I wanted it to be a surprise, as well. So I thought I’d just … drop a little hint, into your mind, to see what you’d think.”

You gawked. “You can do that?”

He seemed playfully amused by your reaction. “Of course,” he said. “I can do many things.”

That made sense, you supposed. He had the ability to call another’s memories to the front of their mind; you couldn’t imagine dreams were all that different. Although you had a feeling he didn’t have to drop that much of a hint to turn your dreams to matrimony.

“Did you give me the orange part too?” you asked.

“No, the orange was entirely of your own creation,” Loki chuckled, nuzzling against your hair. “Although I must say, I found it rather inspirational.”

“Yes,” The early morning silliness had returned, and you smirked. “It certainly was orange-inal.”

Loki made a face. “Now that was atrocious.”

“Really? I found it quite a-peel-ing.”

“Darling—”

“If you’re going to marry me, you better get juiced to it—”

He silenced you with a kiss, and you were content enough to leave it at that.

#loki x reader #loki fluff #loki marvel #loki fanfic #proposal fic #orange is the happiest color #cozy writes

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wardenparker · 2 years

Text

Killer Writing - chapter 8

Dave York x plus size female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

After divorcing Carol so she could marry her soulmate, Dave York threw himself into his work. There is no way he could have predicted that the unexpected collateral damage on an op would turn out to be his soulmate. Now all he can do is keep you safe, and try his best to get you to not hate him as the two of you try to navigate a blooming relationship that started out with threats and a mean right hook.

Rating: E for Explicit. 18+! Word Count: 14.4k Warnings: *Blanket content warning for self-esteem, self-image, and weight issues.* Nightmares, curing, continued gun things, serious anxiety, discussion of PTSD/combat. Light dom/sub dynamics, soft dusting of ‘daddy’ usage, begging, basically the closest we can get to sex without them actually fucking, mention of breeding kink, Dave being exceedingly manly. Food mentions. Summary: Life in the cabin is going to present a few challenges, but might also pave the way to some new relationships amongst the group. Notes: So sorry for the delay in posting time this week, guys. Chronic illness has truly been kicking my ass. Hopefully the way these two anxious babies love the hell out of each other will be worth the wait. 💘

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6 ~ Ch 7 ~ Ch 8

It’s after sunrise when you wake up but who knows how long after, gasping for air and feeling like your heart is going to beat out of your chest. You’re at the cabin. The safe house. There is literally no safer place to be. It’s in the name. The dream you were having reverberates between your ears, making you reach for the man next to you to just make sure he’s okay. He’s alive, lying beside you, and that fucking bullet was aimed at you not him. He’s okay.

The second you shift and touch him, his eyes open. Sleep had been practically non-existent last night. Several times, he had slipped out of the bed to check the security and put his eyes on the perimeter of the cabin. Needing to make sure that you were safe. He had fired off several text messages, still furious that they were coming for you despite their seller being dead and the information gone. His gut is telling him that they believe you might still have a copy of it, wanting to get their hands on it. "Morning." He rasps out, clearing his throat and trailing his eyes over your face to see how you are feeling this morning.

“Morning.” The impulse to practically throw yourself into his side is too strong to deny and you burrow under his arm immediately. “Did you sleep?”

“Would you actually believe me if I said yes?” He asks, head hurting but pushing it aside so he can focus on you.

“I would take it as a compliment.” You tell him, voice muffled against his skin. “I’d like to think you can relax around me, but I know things aren’t normal right now…”

“Baby…it’s not because I’m not relaxed around you.” He promises softly, hand stroking your back. “I’m just on edge.” He swallows. “I almost lost you last night.”

The brittle edges of your nightmare are sticking into your heart like barbed wire, and you sniffle audibly. “I dreamt it was you,” you admit, voice so quiet even you can barely hear yourself. “Th-that’s what woke me up…”

He knows how that feels. Dreaming about someone that he cares about being in harm’s way or killed. He soothes you, pulling you tighter and trying to ground you in his touch. “We are both safe. Right here in this cabin, in this bed, together.”

“I know.” The knowledge doesn’t stop you from wrapping your arm around him, though, and holding him as tight as he is holding you - both of you desperate to prove to yourself that you are actually safe. “I know you’ll protect me. I just wish I could protect you somehow.”

His lips find your hair and he sighs. “Honey…you are doing more by being here than you will ever realize.” He murmurs softly.

“I hope so.” With a weak smile, you press your lips to the warm skin of his shoulder and shift to slide out of bed. “Gonna brush my teeth so I can kiss you,” you explain when his brow furrows slightly at your moving away from him.

“Stay.” He insists. “I don’t care.” He doesn’t want you to leave, hating how vulnerable you sound and he feels. “Just kiss me.”

“But yesterday…?” You shake your head at yourself and crawl back under the covers, waiting no time in tucking right back into his side where you belong. “I’m okay, love. We’re okay.” Kissing him is as easy as breathing now that you’ve passed the awkward barrier of the very first time, and if he’d let you, you swear just would just live with your lips pressed to his.

“I –” He grins when he realizes his blunder yesterday. “I meant my morning breath was bad.” He tells you. “Not that I couldn’t kiss you. Carol never liked it.”

“Sounds like Carol was pickier than me.” Leaning in lets you nudge his nose with yours easily. “As long as I get to kiss you, that’s all I care about.”

Dave smiles and presses his lips to yours. “Good.”

This is the only place nothing else matters. Right here in Dave’s arms with his scent filling your nose and his body under your fingertips, his soft sighs vibrating in your ears with every taste of his lips. This is the only place that the rest of the world doesn’t exist and you can just be, even pushing away this morning’s intrusive thoughts when his strong arms wind around you and roll you onto your back - pinning you under his bulk in a way that makes you feel nearly dainty despite every hang up you’ve ever had with your own size.

“Baby.” He trails kisses along your jaw and nips your skin with his teeth. “You are so soft and warm.” He growls out happily, grinding against your cunt.

“All —” you whimper at the contact, swollen clit already hypersensitive to the searing hot pressure of having him against you. “All for you, love. Always.”

"I'm not going to - fuck you." He grunts, loving the way your breath hitches and your legs spread even more, giving him more access to you. "Not right now." He leans down and sucks on your pulse. "But I do want you to feel good. Do you want to cum baby?"

“Mmhmm.” Whining and squirming under him, you nod your head frantically as though he would even be looking at your face instead of concentrating on littering your skin with bites, licks, and sucking kisses that you’ll be feeling residually for hours. “Please…please — want to cum for you.” You beg, eyes closed in your own little world of bliss as you reach one hand between you to palm his heavy cock.

“Shit.” He hisses, hips rolling forward into your hand. It’s amazing how worked up you can get him. “Baby, let me make you cum.” He practically whines, pushing against your hand.

Though you would do anything to make him say your name in that needy voice, the need to feel him overwhelm all your senses gets the better of you. With one more gentle squeeze for good measure, you slowly and deliberately bring your hands up over your head. The thought of those elaborate restraints you unwrapped yesterday morning at his kitchen island makes you wish he carried cuffs or something, undeniable curiosity bubbling to the surface.

There is something about seeing you lift your hands up, submitting and giving yourself over to him that nearly makes him feral. He lurches up, grasping the sides of your panties in both of his hands and shredding to them in his eagerness to get to your naked folds.

“Oh fuck…” His full bulk between your legs keeps you from doing anything but whining at how desperate his reaction is, and despite the fact that he just ruined your best panties you absolutely could not fucking care less at the moment. Your fingers carefully wind around the wooden rods in the bed’s headboard, holding on tight as Dave’s hungry eyes take in your whole body underneath him. If you didn’t want so badly for your first time to be a romantic moment of passion, you would be begging him to fuck you right now.

There’s a grunt, a whine, when he pushes your legs up onto his shoulder but he’s too busy shoving his boxers down to even care. Letting his cock flop out and the weight of it rests against the slick lips of your cunt. “Fuck.” He hisses, shallowly thrusting and groaning when your wetness starts to coat him.

Every stunted shudder of his hips nudges the head of his cock over your swollen clit and you swear you might suddenly develop enough strength to break this fucking headboard from how tight you’re gripping the thing. “Need more.” Is the desperate moan that makes it past your lips. “Please, Daddy.”

There is a wicked smirk on his face when you say that. Pulling back, he spits on your pussy and slides his cock back through the extra wetness. Spitting should not be sexy, the voice in the back of your head protests, but here you are rolling your hips up to meet his own movements and practically crying at how good it feels to have him thrusting anywhere near your pussy.

He loves looking down and seeing the head of his cock sliding through your folds. Knowing that if the timing was right, he could just slide inside you. But this teasing is what is needed right now, not willing to take that step until you are ready. He ruts against you, groaning at how slick it sounds, how eagerly you are squirming under him. “Fucking gorgeous.”

“F-feels so—fuck—” With your mind everywhere and pleasure overwhelming every sensation, it seems impossible to form a coherent sentence let alone express just how amazing he feels not-quite fucking you. Your whole body is lit up like a star map, little supernovas of pleasure exploding with every thrust of his hips. “Holy shit.”

Dave groans, loving how fucked out you look, even if his cock isn’t buried inside you. Loving how you are experiencing pleasure beyond just the normal expectation. The puffy lips of your cunt catching on the shaft of his cock and making him groan as he ruts against you.

It feels otherworldly, this cloud you’re riding on so far above any kind of normal reality, and the rambling begging and pleading tumbling from your lips would be unrecognizable to your ears if you could actually process anything you’re saying. All you know is you desperately need to cum and you want him to utterly wreck you in the process. If you hadn’t committed to keeping your hands tangled in the bed frame, you might be clawing at him right now in an effort to drag him closer, but with every sensation better than the last, you don’t know that you would even want him to do anything different.

“Look at you.” He groans, keeping his hips moving and turning his head to scrape his teeth along the inside of your right knee. “So fucking eager to cum. You’re going to be a good girl and cum for me?” He asks, letting go of your calf and slapping the outside of your thigh. Groaning when you keen and arch up, almost making him venture too close to your entrance.

“P-please.” It might be the most-moaned word in your vocabulary, and you don’t even care. “So…so fucking close. Oh my god.”

He keeps rolling his hips, fingers biting into the soft flesh of your calves and making the skin indent from how he is gripping you. The slick sounds of his flesh sliding over yours and the slap of the way his hips meet your thighs fills the space in the tiny cabin room. Driving away every thought but the sole focus of how hot you are, how wet you are getting, and he loves the way that the wood from the headboard creaks from how hard you are pulling on it, using it to keep yourself from flying off the bed. "Fuck"

It’s on a longer pass of his hips that the searing head of his cock nudges your overstimulated clit just right and you practically black-out with the force of the organ that crashes over you. Even the best times you’ve even given yourself - even as amazing as yesterday and the day before were - it’s a little like being thrown off a fifty-story drop and trusting him to catch you. The way your body tenses up, grasping for any way to bring him in closer when he’s not actually inside you, makes his name sound strangled from your lips but fuck if it isn’t better than you had ever dreamed that to see moments with your soulmate could be.

He can feel the blood pounding in your clit. The way your cunt begs him to fill it, making him grit his teeth, hissing out a curse while he watches your heavy-lidded eyes flutter in pleasure. Steadily thrusting through your folds and loving the way that you whimper every time your overstimulated sex reacts to having him rub against you. His own pace stutters slightly as he gets close.

“C-cum for me, daddy, fuck need to see you cum.” The hears in your mind utterly change gears when you feel his hips stutter against you, no longer giving a single fuck about anything but his pleasure. Watching him. Having him cum all across your skin if he can manage it - and that thought has you breathless. “Cum on me, please!”

It's fucking filthy hearing that come out of your mouth. Making Dave groan when his entire body tightens and that rush of heat races down his spine to make him start throbbing. Dark eyes nearly coal black from how lust blown they are as he looks down at you, the first spurt of his release painting a long rope up your belly.

You swear you nearly cum a second time yourself just from watching - the way Dave’s whole body tightens like a bowstring over you and long jets of pearlescent cum look opaque white against your skin. “Jesus fuck…” You hadn’t even realized you were holding your breath until you let it go, falling back against the sheets and reaching to coax him down to you with one crooked finger. “You’re fucking amazing, you know that?”

He doesn't care that he's going to get his cum on his stomach, when you beckon him down, he's lowering himself to you. Letting your legs fall off his shoulders so he can press against you and kiss your lips. "Yeah?" There's a smug, cocky tone to his voice as he pulls back, pecking your lips again. "How is that?"

“I thought seeing stars when you cum was a myth.” The hum in your throat when he misses you pitches up into a whine of protest when he pulls away. “Apparently not.”

“Only when you’re with me.” He teases, smirking when he looks at the mess he made of your body. “Want to shower?” He asks. “I’ll wipe off and start a fire for us.”

“Sounds perfect.” Reaching up for him one more time, Dave helps you haul your messy self off the bed and laughs when you struggle out of the bundled-up trap your shirt became during all that morning exercise. There isn’t anything in the cabin that you can wear yet besides what you came in, so it looks like no underwear for you until his team drops off supplies.

Dave grins, slapping your ass and admiring the way that it jiggles. “I’m not sorry at all.” He announces, chuckling at your pursed lips as you pick up your destroyed panties.

“These were my good ones,” you inform him, trying for scolding but falling far short. Everything that just happened was far too perfect to ever be upset about.

“I will buy you more.” He promises. “As many as you want in every color you can think of.”

“It’s fine.” They’re just panties, and it would be a silly thing to get upset about in the first place. “You’re just going to have to deal with me going commando until your team drops off our supplies,” you tease, throwing him a wink as you scamper off to the shower.

"Ohhhhh nooooo." He calls out sarcastically after you. "That's horrible. I guess I must go commando too."

*****

When you re-emerge about twenty minutes later after a scalding hot shower using soap that smells like him, you pull your clothes from the night before back on and find him sitting in front of the fireplace with a small fire crackling away. “So what is on the agenda today?” You ask him, plopping down right beside him and tucking into his side.

"I'm going to check the perimeter alarms when the guys arrive." He reaches over and grips your thigh. "Make sure that we have everything in place. Chop some extra wood."

“Is one of them going to stay in here with me?” The paranoia - the fear - leaks through the question and you instantly hate yourself for it. It’s fair for you to be scared, but you don’t want him to think you’re weak.

"That's why I want to wait until they get here." He reassures you. He knows that you are scared. If he hadn't led the life he has, he would be too. Fuck, there is a tiny portion of him that is scared. Scared of not being able to protect you and losing you to this. His hand flexes around the soft flesh of your thigh and he soothes it by rubbing gently. "I want you to feel safe and baby..." He waits until your reluctantly eyes meet yours. "You are doing great. You are so brave."

“I don’t feel it,” you admit quietly, leaning into the bulk of him further. He’s an anchor, keeping you from floating away in the panic and uncertainty of everything around you. “But thank you.”

"Baby...." He sighs and rubs your thigh. "I curled up into a ball and cried on the floor of my tent after the first firefight I was in." He admits softly. "People shooting at me, firing RPGs at our position and actively trying to kill me. I had to fire back. I had to kill them before they could kill me and my men." His voice is slightly hollow, and he is taken back to nearly twenty years before, fresh out of training and deployed. "Still didn't stop me from bawling like a baby when I came back to base alive." He looks over at you and gives you a stiff smile. "You are doing better than I did."

“If I had had to fire back to survive, I’d be dead right now.” That much you can promise him as you wind your arms around his waist and tug him tight against you. He is your anchor, and you are determined to be his if you can. “Plus, I think I’m in shock a little. But whatever it is, I’m just glad you’re here.”

"I'm going to stay here." He vows, his own arm lifting and coming around your shoulder to pull you tight. "I'm not going anywhere, baby. I have to find out the ending to your story." He teases, wanting to lighten the moment slightly.

“Fuck if I know.” Your laugh is practically a hiccup and you nudge his chest playfully. “I make it up as a go along. The end could come tomorrow or it could come in fifty years.”

"Life imitating art?" He asks, brow lifting, and he appraises you with a teasing grin. "Or art imitating life?"

“I never had any kind of life that art would want to imitate before.” Pushing yourself up a little, you press a soft kiss to his lips and grin. “I guess that’s what the book will be for.”

He chuckles and leans over to kiss you again. "Then I guess I better make sure it's a good experience, huh?"

“Well, it’s definitely not boring.” A tilt of your head and a smirk accompany your small laugh, and you lace your fingers through his easily. “What should we do until they get here? Just sit around and keep being cute by the fire?”

"Well, I was thinking that you must be hungry." He hums. "Considering that you didn't eat much last night and go through and see what kind of food we have stored."

“You’re in charge.” That’s not even a stretch - knowing that he is far more capable of taking care of the two of you in this environment than you could ever hope to be. “Lead the way and I’ll happily follow.”

He snorts and smirks at you. "Oh, don't tell me that." He huffs, recovered from his irritation at you being in danger now that you are relatively safer and able to concentrate on you again.

“Why not?” You bat your eyelashes at him innocently. “Daddy doesn’t want to be in charge?”

"Brat..." He hisses, narrowing his eyes playfully at you. "Don't make me take you across my knee and spank you."

“I might like it.” It isn’t a word you ever thought would apply to you - brat - but the way his eyes light up like fire when he says it makes you want to find out. You never thought you would end up calling anyone daddy in bed, either. “Can’t know unless we try.”

"Oh, we can." He promises, voice dropping down a few octaves. "I can imagine that ass with my handprint raised on your skin. Your little pussy dripping when you beg me to fuck you."

“Just like I almost did a half an hour ago?” You reveal, raising one eyebrow at him and pulling your bottom lip between your teeth in the best imitation of a sultry expression that you can muster.

"I'm really going to kill that man when I get my hands on him." He groans, cock twitching again. "We could have....fuck...."

Now you actually feel a little bad, chuckling weakly as you shrug your shoulders. “It would have been the perfect way to end our first date…but…shit happened…”

He hums, reaching up and cupping your cheek. "I – shit, you are just amazing."

“Why? Because I want to sleep with you?” You scrunch up your nose and shake your head at him. “That just means I have eyes and a general attraction to men. I’m surprised you don’t have people lined up around your apartment building.”

"I'm picky." He teases, leaning in and kissing the tip of your nose. "Honestly, I'm too old to be going out and picking up random women, and I wasn't comfortable with someone getting close again. Not until someone punched me on the jaw."

“Not very well-behaved of me.” You snicker, kissing the tip of his nose in turn. “My brattiest moment, if I ever had one.”

"You can be bratty." He huffs. grinning at you. "I didn't hate it."

“We’ll see. I think the only time I’ll ever be throwing a punch your way again is when you’re teaching me.” Shuffling around a little, you push up into your knees, brush a kiss on his lips, and stand. “Want to check out our food storage situation?”

"Of course baby." He immediately stands, following you as you make your way to the kitchen. "Although you might try to punch me if I surprise you." He jokes, chuckling at your huff.

“You just want to get hit.” He does it to tease you, you know that, and you can’t deny enjoying it as a show of affection. The kitchen cupboards are full - pots and pans and all manner of tools alongside nonperishable foods and plenty of mixes. “The pancake mix only needs water.” You offer, after scrounging around a little. “There’s cooking spray and maple syrup. Does the stove need propane, or does it have gas?”

"It's all connected to a tank." He tells you. "It's all ready to go, just needs the pilot lit."

“Pancakes, then?” It’s the closest thing to a normal meal you can offer, and a little normalcy sounds comforting.

"That sounds good." He hums. "There is also some shelf stable bacon." He offers.

“Well now we’re just fancy.” You shoot him a grin as the two of you start to assemble the things necessary for your breakfast just as easily as if you were still in his apartment.

"We like the creature comforts." He argues playfully. "The boys will bring up your tea so you can cozy up with a cup in front of the fireplace like this is just a weekend away." He wants you to have that normalcy. "And a computer so you can work on your idea. No chance of them tracking it because there is no internet up here."

“I am an expert at playing pretend.” The familiar motions of cooking are soothing in their own right, making it easy to chat and smile despite the reason you’re tucked away from civilization. “That’s what my friend and I do all day long. Just…over the Internet.”

"There is nothing wrong with that." He understands. "I never consciously think about the fact that my mother is gone. I just- she's never available to talk, you know?"

“Ours is more like…playing the sandboxes other people have made.” You shrug, measuring out water from the sink to add to the pre-made flour mix. “You know - fanfic. She and I write together sometimes.”

"Really?" He arches a brow and smirks. "Getting together and plotting smutty little scenes?" He likes the idea of what might have been said between girlfriends, having learned early on what women talk about when they get together when Carol would have wine night at the house.

“We’ve…” Huffing, you pour your momentary embarrassment into whisking the pancake batter. “We’ve never actually met. She got a family and everything in Virginia and I’m just her weird Internet gremlin friend. But she’s great, and I…I just hope she’s not worried, that’s all. We usually talk every day.”

"If you want, you can give one of the guys her username and they can send her a message." Dave offers. It's not like people don't know you are alive now, so it would be less risk than if you were to try to contact her.

“That…that would be good. Thank you, love.” It’s actually a huge relief, but your eyebrows furrow a little anyway. “Maybe my dad, too? Just to tell him that I found you? We could say we went on a little vacation or something. Just so he won’t worry?”

"I'm actually going to send Resnick over to watch over your dad." He hadn't told you that yet, but he didn't want something happening to the old man because of all of this. "So if you want to write him a letter, he can give it to him directly."

Abandoning the bowl of batter momentarily, you fling both arms tight around Dave’s waist and squeeze. “Thank you,” you murmur into his chest. “My Dad and Katie mean everything to me. I mean…before you, they were all I had.”

"Now you have more than them." He promises, knowing that every single one of the guys would do whatever it took to keep you safe. The moment Dave accepted you as his soulmate, you had become one of the group - even if you weren't completely okay with what they did. "You've got big brothers and you'll love Kovac's wife."

“What’s she like?” All you know about her so far is that she once slept with Dave - so clearly she has impeccable taste.

"Well, she's your body type." He hums, taking the opportunity to leer at you while you turn back to your pancake mix. "Shoulder length hair that she puts pink and purple streaks in. She's got a dirty sense of humor - have to with Kovac for her soulmate. Takes no shit and funny enough, she's a writer too. Op ed for the Washington Chronicle." He chuckles. "For her birthday last year, she made Kovac get a tattoo of a rose on his ass because she always wanted one but she didn't want the pain."

The way you freeze up at the stove with your mouth hanging open and your eyes wide should be comical but it’s just too big of a coincidence. It can’t be. That would be far too crazy. “What…um…what did…” you shake your head, grasping at composure. “They have two boys? Five and three?”

It's Dave's turn to freeze, shifting back through the information that Kovac had given you during that afternoon in his apartment. Had it really only been yesterday? "They do." He nods. "Turner and Hunter."

“And a golden retriever named Bo?” You remember two years ago when they adopted the slobbering ball of snuggles. It was right after you and Katie had started talking regularly. “She…um…she publishes under her maiden name, right?”

Dave huffs, shaking his head. “Wilkins, yeah. She uses K.K Wilkins.” He puts his hands on his hips. “How do you know this?” His trust doesn’t waver but it’s starting to get fucking creepy.

The way you practically slump against the stove makes you grateful it’s not turned on yet, and you’re practically in tears for no other reason than being overwhelmed at this incredibly welcome turn of events. ��Because I’ve been talking to her everyday for almost two years,” you tell him quietly, sniffling back an overflow of emotion. “Yesterday I thought it was a silly coincidence that Kovac’s wife has the same name as my friend. But…it’s not. It’s her. The tattoo story couldn’t be more than one person.”

His eyes widen and there is a moment when he just absorbs the fact that he could have met you through a completely innocent turn of events. And then he throws his head back and laughs.

“What?” Whatever reaction you had been expecting from him, this definitely isn’t it.

“Oh - fuck.” He manages to catch his breath and he reaches for you. “You- there was a story you, uh, co-wrote with her?” He tilts his head. “How to Sleep with Your Husband’s Best Friend - apparently I’m Dan. I didn’t even catch that.”

“No!” Bundled up against his chest, his laughter rattles through both of you and infects you right to the core. “I…um…I definitely had some good me time writing that story,” you admit with a laugh.

“God.” He huffs. “What are the fucking odds?” He asks, kissing your forehead. “At least the story was flattering.”

“I guess the universe really wanted us together.” What else could have done it if not the power of the universe and all your silly little soulmate markings. “We we’re going to meet come hell or high water.”

“You would have had to meet her in person.” He reminds you playfully. “Not just being her internet gremlin friend.”

“So instead, the universe decided to have me almost get killed. Twice.” While you might be playing it up like it’s overdramatic, it definitely is just dramatic with no over- or under-. “I was just being a good little gremlin…minding my own business…”

“Gremlin.” He shakes his head and kisses your head again. “Maybe the universe thought I needed to be showcased as the hero, saving his damsel in distress.” He teases.

“I’m a damsel. I’m in distress. I can handle it.” There’s probably no way he’ll pick up on the reference you’re making, but you toss him the best sultry smirk you can manage and cock your hip in his direction as you turn back to the stove to actually start cooking your breakfast, grinning with amusement over the whole thing. The world really did look at the two of you and go by any means necessary and then picked the absolute most insane scenario in the world to make happen.

“You have to admit, this is a way cooler story than being introduced by your porn writing buddy.” He tells you, enjoying this. Now he knows Kate’s secret and he’s just got to find out if her meathead of a husband knows.

“I dunno, I could stand not to be targeted by assassins or secret agents or whatever.” And the fact that that is a real sentence is both ludicrous and terrifying, but you just roll your eyes as you light the pilot light on the stove.

“Are you sure?” He asks playfully. “You are in a romantic cabin surrounded by snow. Tucked away. Perfect for losing your virginity when you’re ready.”

“And it would have been just as perfect in your apartment.” Leaning over, you press a kiss over his heart and reach for the cooking spray to get some pancakes underway. “Although, I have to admit…the fireplace is a nice touch. The apartment doesn’t have a fireplace.”

“House with a fireplace.” He hums. “Noted. You want one in the bedroom or just in the living room?” He asks seriously.

“As long as there is one, I don’t care.” But this line of conversation is a kind of warm that goes right to your heart instead of your core, and you smile at him. “What’s the one thing you absolutely must have when we buy a house?”

“Are you going to look at me strange when I say a basement?” He asks, smirking at you slightly.

“Depends on what you want the basement for.” You tell him honestly, and wish you had your mug of tea to wrap your hands around and sip. “Man Cave? Game Room? Absolutely. Murder Lab? No way.”

He snorts. “Murder lab.” He shakes his head and gives you a disappointed look as he props his hands on his hips. “There has been one thing that I have brought back to my residence that would tie me to the things that I do.” He tells you. “You. You are the only thing from a job I have ever brought home.”

“I was teasing, love.” Even saying the word, using it like a little pet name, gives you a thrill and a sense of belonging that makes you feel like you’re glowing. “Of course you should have a basement if you want one. No questions asked.”

“Oh you should ask some questions.” He huffs, reaching out and pinching you. “It might be a sex dungeon for all you know.”

“If it’s a sex dungeon then maybe I want to be surprised.” You wiggle your eyebrows at him and smirk. “That sounds like a really fun surprise.”

“Fuck.” He hisses, biting his lip and imagining how you are going to torment him throughout his life with that damn surprising sense of humor. “I will not get over how you are still a virgin but so damn filthy.”

“Well, you can blame part of that on Katie.” Your friend is a constant source of encouragement and tends to gleefully needle at some of your dirtier qualities, bringing them to the surface. Especially when you write together. “But mostly it’s just all that pent-up sexual energy that I haven’t gotten out over my entire life, minus the last four days.”

“So I’m going to be fucked out when we have sex?” He teases.

Rolling your eyes at him, you flip the pancakes in the pan and nudge his side. “Baby, I’ve got like fifteen years of being horny and single to make up for. We’ll be fine.”

“I might have to get some Viagra to keep up with your demands.” He moans woefully, completely kidding of course.

“Easier to get than a lot of a lot of life-saving treatments.” You shrug merrily, loving his teasing mood. “I’m sure you’ll get a high-five from the doc when you go in complaining that your soulmate is too horny for you to keep up with.”

He snorts and bobbles his head in agreement. “Probably.” He admits, unable to resist sliding up behind you back and squeezing your ass. “But I don’t think I’ll need that for a while.”

“I seriously doubt it.” A tiny roll of your hips makes him almost choke on a breath and you grin victoriously as you reach across the counter to grab the bacon he had found and throw it in a second pan. “This morning was perfect, by the way. The perfect way to wake up and the perfect kind of half-step to feel more ready for actual sex.”

“Just let me know if I push too fast.” He demands softly, leaning in and pressing his lips to the juncture of your neck. “I never want you feeling rushed.”

“I don’t.” You hum softly at the way his lips on your skin light up every nerve ending in your body. “I’m ready. Now it’s just about finding the perfect moment.”

“Should have asked them to bring a bottle of wine.” He murmurs between kisses to your neck. “Or a bottle of whiskey.”

“You’re telling me this place doesn’t have any booze stored away?” A little whimper escapes your lips when he nips at your skin. “I don’t believe that.”

“Okay there might be a bottle in the top cabinet.” He hums. “But the cheap shit. You don’t care when your numbing an injury.”

“We don’t need it anyway,” you tell him, easily tipping your head to one side to give him more skin to kiss as his hands start wandering. “All I need is you.”

The perimeter alarm starts to sound. A small beeping and a flashing light near the front door. Dave looks up, already expecting the guys but he pulls away, patting yours ass in reassurance. “Keep cooking baby.” He murmurs. “It’s the guys.”

“They have terrible timing.” You pout, hating that you have to lose the heat of Dave’s body against yours even if it’s for a good reason.

“The fucking worst.” He agrees, walking into the living room and checking the window to make sure it was in fact the guys. Even if he was expecting them, he wouldn’t make another mistake with your safety.

Resnick’s truck crests the top of the hill easily, it’s nondescript appearance and utter lack of anything remarkable making it the perfect vehicle for this trip. Just another truck with a covered cab rolling down the highway on a regular day. Ari jumps out of the cab as soon as he parks, wasting no time in checking the perimeter while Kovac climbs out to knock on the cabin door.

Dave unlocks the door and opens it. “Any issues getting here?” He demands, watching Resnick walk over to the car Dave had stolen yesterday.

“We thought we might have a tail at first but the van took an exit halfway here. Coincidence.” Kovac looks around the cabin, waving awkwardly when he glances in your direction. “You guys manage okay last night?”

“Yeah, we were good.” Dave doesn’t mention your newfound connection to the group, leaving that up to you. “Of course it was upsetting for her, but she’s tougher than she knows.”

"Good." Kovac's head bobs a little as he looks around the cabin. "We're gonna figure this out, Dave," he murmurs, not wanting you to hear him. "We're not gonna let them get to her again."

“No we’re not.” Of that he’s completely certain. “I think they believe she has another copy of the specs.” He reveals. “Since they didn’t get it from the lab.”

"That's a fair guess." The corresponding nod Kovac gives is slightly off kilter, but he rubs his chin thoughtfully. "The haul we brought with us should have you guys set up for three weeks. If we need more than that for any reason, we can do another drop, but we'll be in touch far before then."

“Good.” Dave nods. “I’m going to send Resnick to her dad.” He tells Kovac. “She��s not going to be home for Christmas and I don’t want the old man to worry. And I don’t want those fucks to use him to draw her out.”

"Is there anyone else we need to check on?" The other man has no idea what family or friends you might have, but if Dave is thinking this far ahead then he already has an answer.

Dave grins and gives a small chuckle. “I’ll let her tell you about the other one. Her friend apparently has been worried about her.”

After starting up a second pan of pancakes, you can actually step away from the stove long enough to stick your head around the corner. “Everything okay?” You ask, eyes flicking between Dave and his friend Kovac curiously. “I mean…as okay as it can be? All things considered?”

“Yeah babe.” Dave motions you over. “Talk to this knucklehead and I’ll watch the pancakes.” He offers, smirking at you.

You manage to steal a kiss as Dave passes you and are grinning like an idiot by the time you make it out into the living room. “He wants me to talk to you about Kate,” you explain, knowing Kovac won’t have a single fucking clue as to what’s going on.

The larger man immediately frowns and shuffles on his feet, hand coming up to swipe at the back of his neck. “I’m sorry.” He huffs, feeling guilty for potentially causing problems between you and Dave for his previous dalliances. “I shouldn’t have made it seem like Dave would cheat or still had something for Kate. He doesn’t. He was one thousand percent faithful to Carol - beyond watching a beautiful woman walk by. But that’s—” he gestures helpless and tries not to stick his foot in his mouth. “That’s not any different than drooling over some actor.”

“Which she does with her friend online.” You prompt, making sure you don’t sound the least bit judgmental and trying to go all the way for up-beat. “This isn’t about Dave and Kate having slept together. I honestly don’t care who he was with before I met him. Just…has she mentioned anything about an online friend being MIA the last few days? A friend she writes stories with sometimes?” Sure you’ve talked every day for the last two years, but fuck if you know if she has ever mentioned you to her husband in any way, shape, or form.

He frowns, running his hand over his face and scraping the prickly hair of his stubble. “She mentioned it last night before bed. She hadn’t said much - just that it’s been a fucking week and she’s trying to figure out what she did to piss her off and if ‘Gremlin’ hasn’t responded by today, she wanted me to track her down and make sure she’s okay using every contact I have.” He frowns. “Why?”

That makes you smile in a grateful way you hadn’t anticipated - that Kate would be so worried that she would ask for something like that. It’s relieving to know that the sisterhood you’ve developed isn’t at all one-sided. “Because… I’m ‘3gremlinsinalabcoat’. Dave and I just figured it out. I asked him to tell me a little about your wife and it all just clicked.”

“Oh shit.” His mouth drops open and his eyes widen for a moment in shock. “Really?” He processes it and grins. “Dave! Dave!” He shouts, making the other man look around the corner. “Our soulmates are going to be trouble together!” He cackles.

“Will you just let her know I’m okay? Tell her I’m sorry I disappeared?” You shake your head, smiling. “It’s kind of your fault I disappeared without a word, anyway. So I’m sure she’ll understand.”

“Shit.” He hisses, realizing how screwed he is when his wife finds out that piece of information. He digs in his pocket and pulls out his phone. “Selfie for proof of life?” He begs. “Otherwise, I’m the doghouse forever.”

Katie has always described her husband as being like one of those strawberry candies everybody’s grandma used to carry - hard and seemingly impenetrable outside with a sweet, gushy inside once you put in the work to get there. You can see it now, as he pulls out his phone and leans in close to put both of your faces in the frame. “Please tell her that I’m sorry I made her worry,” you ask, knowing that if it was you and she had just stopped talking - you would have assumed that she hated you.

Kovac snaps the photo and takes another, turning and kissing your cheek. “I’ll let her know. It’s our fault, so she can yell at me about it.” He promises before he winks at you. “After I tell her that you’re busy getting to know Dave - your soulmate.” He chuckles and rubs your back. “She talks about you a lot. Conversations you have, stories you’re writing. You are her best friend.”

“She’s mine, too.” And the relief you feel that you won’t have to hide any of this from her is enough to bowl you over right where you stand. “She’s kept me afloat so many times when I felt like I was drowning that we used to joke that I was her second soulmate.”

He chuckles and nods. “Do you know how many times she threaten to trade me for ‘Gremlins’ when I annoyed her?” She had been joking and he had never taken offense but it was ironic how things were working out.

“Sounds like it will just be a girls’ day from now on,” you joke. “Although now I totally get why we went so long without really talking about family so much. She told me that you were in law enforcement…which is putting it very mildly.”

He has the decency to blush, rubbing at the back of his neck again and shuffling awkwardly. “Yeah.” He gives a slight shrug. “It’s easier than trying to explain what we really do.”

“Dave’s serious about the security firm,” You remind him gently. “It’ll be different soon. I know she worries about you - she’s said so and I couldn’t really understand it before. But I definitely do now.”

He blows out a breath, rolling his shoulders back and releasing the tension in them. “I know she will be thrilled.” He admits. “She’s never loved what we do, but it’s never affected our home life beyond out of town trips.”

“I’m sorry you and I got off on a bad start.” This is your best friend’s soulmate, and one of your soulmate’s best friends. If nothing else, you don’t want bad air between you. “You were just doing your job and I was, well I was fucking scared, but I’m glad Dave has you guys to watch his back.”

“You have nothing to apologize for.” He huffs. “We need to apologize. We totally upended your life. But—” He sighs and shoots you a grin. “I am happy for Dave that he saw that tattoo. He’s a good man and he deserves to be happy.”

“I’m going to do everything I can to make sure he stays happy.” It’s not an easy promise to make even if the words are easy to say, but you mean it worth every fiber of your being. “I love him. So much.”

“I know he loves you too.” Of that he’s completely certain. “He never even considered quitting for Carol. And she hated it when she found out.”

“For better or worse, he didn’t have any choice in telling me.” The smile on your face when Dave appears again from around the corner is broad and honest. “I’m glad there aren’t any lies between us. Even if the truth isn’t always easy to swallow.”

“That’s true.” Kovac chuckles. “We had decided that our soulmates would know the truth. Too hard to try to keep it a secret.”

Ari and Resnick come through the front door together, shopping bags and cardboard boxes in hand. “Boss!” Ari calls for Dave while Kovac retrieves the bags of your clothing from his hand. “Where do you want us to put this stuff?”

“Leave it on the table.” He calls back. “We’ll organize it and go through it.”

“I’m going to change my clothes.” The announcement is mostly meant for Dave, but this way all the guys know they can discuss whatever business they need to without talking in code around you. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Dave watches you close the door and looks at Resnick. “I’m going to send you to watch over her dad.” He tells him. “They could use him to draw her out.” Ari nods, agreeing with him. “Ari, I need you go to my apartment and watch to see if the fucker comes to snoop.”

“Surveillance on both of your places is streaming straight to my phone.” Ari holds up his iPhone and waggles it in the air. “I know she’s not going back to her old place, but they don’t, so I kept the surveillance in tact. Now I’m fucking glad I did.”

“Good man.” Dave nods in approval, knowing his team rarely makes mistakes and always thinks ahead. “We can’t fuck this up. It’s too important. I almost fucking lost her last night. A kiss saved her goddamn life.”

“Hell of a kiss.” Ari shakes his head with a rueful chuckle. “You guys sit tight and try not to go crazy. Do we have an address for her dad?”

Dave pulls out his phone and sends the address to Resnick. “I told her that she could write a letter for you to give him. It’s almost Christmas and they are all each other had for a long time.”

“I’ll take care of it.” They have all spent enough holidays away from family, he knows how hard the first one can be. “Hopefully we can get everything squared away and the threat neutralized, and you can meet your father-in-law at New Years.”

Dave huffs and nods, not happy to change your plans. “Can you call them - let them know I won’t be able to deliver meals?”

“I’ll take your place,” Ari promises readily. He and his wife had deliberately planned to do nothing at all this year, but leaving fellow vets without a hot meal just isn’t an option to him. He knows she’ll understand, and will probably be a driver herself when he explains. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Tell Deirdre that I appreciate it.” Dave hums, looking back towards the bedroom door. “You didn’t happen to include anything that could be considered Christmasy, did you?”

“We put a nice bottle of scotch and some chocolates in.” Kovac admits, looking more than a little sheepish as he runs the back of his neck. “Once I tell Kate who she is, I guarantee she’s going to want to drop something off on Christmas Eve.”

“Who she is?” Ari looks confused, trading glances with Resnick. “You mean Dave’s soulmate?”

“She’s Katie’s best friend.” Kovac shakes his head, still baffled by the coincidence. “You know how she’s always on her phone writing stories? Dave’s girl is the one she’s been writing with, apparently.”

“No shit?” Ari chuckles and shakes his head. “Deirdre has read some of those. They’re fucking hot.”

“Everything okay out here?” When you emerge a minute later, the guys are standing around the stove with their heads bowed but smiling. “I don’t know who did the shopping, but thank you. Everything fits.”

“I --uh, did.” Kovac confesses, although shopping wasn’t quite the word he would use for breaking into the Torrid store and stealing the clothes. You didn’t need to know that though. “Katie drags me shopping with her all the time. So…yeah.”

“Thank you.” Reaching out to touch his shoulder on your way to Dave’s side is easy now that you have an extra connection to him through your best friend, and once more the reminder that these men are not their jobs rings loud and clear in your heart.

“You’re welcome.” He gives you a grin and winks. “I threw in some stuff Katie loves and I love taking off of her.” He adds, making the other three men chuckle.

“And somehow she and I are the ones who are trouble?” You shake your head at the group of men doubtfully. “I don’t think so.”

“We never claimed we weren’t trouble.” Ari clarifies with a grin. “Just that you two together was going to be trouble.”

“Even more than we already are.” To that you can agree, but you turn and press a kiss to Dave’s cheek. “We should eat before it gets cold. Unless you have stuff you need to take care of?”

Dave shakes his head. “No. They’ve got to get back.” Resnick rolls his eyes and tosses Dave the keys to his truck. “Do not scratch it.” He warns the team leader.

“Do you want to write a note for your dad?” Resnick prompts, not wanting you to forget. From what Dave said, it’s important.

“I’m going to write him that Dave surprised me with a trip after we met through work.” You tell all of them, so that Resnick won’t be surprised by questions if her dad has any and Dave will know your cover as you dig in your purse in the living room for paper and a pen. “He’s been waiting so long for me to meet my soulmate that I don’t think he’ll be too upset. He’ll tease me about it for sure, but I don’t think he’ll be mad.”

“Tell him that I will bring you for a visit and schedule some golf for us to bond over.” He’s rolling his eyes as he says it, but he would do it for you.

“Thank you, honey.” You know it’s not his ideal way to spend a day, but the fact that he’s willing means the world. Before long, a handwritten note is tucked into an envelope and handed over to Resnick to be delivered. “And thank you guys, too. For everything.”

Resnick is the one that answers. “Of course.” He gives you a smile. “Dave would do the same for us. We might not be in the service anymore, but we are still brothers. Which means you are important to us.”

The door shuts behind them, leaving you and Dave alone in the cabin again with a feeling of finality but less foreboding than you expected. Do you fully trust that they will root out whoever is after you? Yes. But are you now locked into another indefinite period of hiding - this time to a much larger extreme? Definitely yes. “Let’s have breakfast,” you suggest, knowing it’s probably cold by now but that you’ll both need the fuel.

“Okay.” Dave senses that you are uneasy but decides to let you talk to him about it. He doesn’t want you to have to express yourself before you are ready.

Dave being quiet is relatively normal, but not you - and it only lasts about halfway through breakfast before you’re putting down your fork with a frown. “What happens if they can’t get the guy?” You ask quietly, eyes trained on your plate. It’s not that you don’t have faith in his team, it’s that none of you know who is trying to kill you and that’s terrifying in a way you’ve never experienced before.

“Then we set a trap.” He sets down his fork and decides the best thing to do is to be honest. “Draw him out so we can get him.” His face hardens. “And mail him back in tiny pieces so they get the fucking message.”

“Set a trap like…be out in public again and wait to be shot at?” He May have praised You for being calm and collected just a few hours ago but you are not feeling it now. It started building inside you as soon as the door closed, and the tide is rising faster than you can talk it down.

“No.” Dave shakes his head. “Too many variables. Too many potential witnesses and casualties. We would draw him here.” He announces. “It’s isolated and I have the advantage here. I know this place, have cameras and alarms.”

“From safe haven to battleground.” The sigh you let out is shaky and you bury your face in your hands to buy yourself a second of fighting for composure. A panic attack isn’t going to help anything, and it definitely will ruin any good mood either of you had going this morning. “Sounds…terrible, honestly. I hope it doesn’t come to that.”

“I hope it doesn’t either.” Dave can see that you are not handling this well. “If it comes down to it, you will be tucked away in the basement. As safe as you can be.”

“And let you be up here all alone fighting or shooting or whatever it is that will end up happening?” Somehow that is an even worse option, and you can feel the anxiety in your stomach somehow boil at the thought. “No. Fuck that. If you’re going to fight for me, then I’m going to fight for you.” Considering how viscerally you hate guns and violence in general, it’s more of a surprise to you than him to have this come out of your mouth so suddenly. But then - is this the measure of your love for him, in a very odd way? The willingness to put everything aside if it means keeping him by your side? “I want you to teach me.”

He can’t deny that determine face and bold words makes his cock twitch and his heart pound. “We don’t have to do it today, love.” He reminds you. “We can take a moment to breathe.”

“I can’t lose you.” It’s a simple fact, but you’re proud of yourself for not getting teary and ruining the way he looks so proud of you for being brave. “I won’t.”

“You aren’t going to lose me, baby.” He reaches over and takes your hand. “We will start with the basics tonight, okay? And then work on target practice tomorrow.”

“Okay.” You’ll have to get over the tingly anxiety of actually being within three feet of a gun, but you were going to have to do that anyway. Life with another person means adjustments, and that’s okay. Squeezing his hand back, you lean over and press a kiss to the back of it. “We’ll start tonight.”

Dave watches you, making sure you eat enough and don’t let the problems of later affect right now. Once you both are done, he picks up the plates and takes them over to the sink. “If you want to go through the bags and start putting things away, I’ll clean up.” He offers, knowing that you might be a little embarrassed by your feminine products despite him being well acquainted with them.

“I’ll grab the things for the bathroom and put them away.” Those things are most for you since the cabin was stocked with the guys in mind, but while you’re poking through the bags you give a slight chuckle. An economy pack of condoms and a bottle of lube made their way into the supply shopping, and you show it to Dave with amusement. “These are going to come in handy after my prescription is up.” It’s not like you are going to be able to go to the pharmacy for your refill.

"Oh." Dave practically short circuits for a moment as he thinks about that reality. He hadn't dealt with a prescription birth control in a long time, Carol had an IUD placed. "Yeah, um..." He blows out a breath and tries to calm his immediate reaction. "We can see about getting your refill."

“You okay?” That reaction wasn’t slightly more visceral than you expected - honestly just figuring it would either earn you a dirty chuckle or something along those lines.

"Yeah." He croaks out weakly, very happy that he is turned towards the sink and away from you. You've never had sex and you damn sure aren't ready for your soulmate's surprising breeding kink that just roared to life and took him by surprise. Kids have never been something he's been opposed to, but with that one innocent comment you make - he finds himself feeling very cavemanish.

“Honey?” He doesn’t sound okay, and you drop the prophylactics back in the bag and pad into the kitchen. “I didn’t think condoms would be such a conversation point. Talk to me.”

"Just...surprised." He's honest in that point, hoping you just think that he's kicking himself for forgetting a detail.

“Okay.” You’re not totally convinced and don’t like the idea that he would keep something from you, but on momentary reflection you decide you’re probably just reading too much into the situation. “I’ll just put them in the nightstand and my stuff in the bedroom.”

Damnit....He hates the self-doubt in your tone and can see the walls start to slowly raise up at his refusal to talk. He's been blunt and shocking you at every turn and he's going to be shy about this? He shakes his head. "Just surprised myself by my gut reaction to that information." He tells you honestly. "I never really considered having a breeding kink before."

“You—?” Spinning on your heel, you had barely made it out of the kitchen and you’re facing him in the open archway in a flash. “That’s an interesting development.” Trying to keep your own surprise in check so he doesn’t feel self-conscious is a little bit of a task, but you do let yourself smile. “The thought of my birth control running out sounding good to you?”

“More than I ever thought possible.” He confesses, happy that you aren’t weirded out. “Doesn’t mean - I mean, I’m not insisting on discarding your prescription or whatever…but.” He gives a slightly self-conscious shrug, “Yeah.”

“I’m going to run out at the end of the month.” You step closer, feeling like this conversation is a little too intimate to be vaguely chatted about across a room. “If we’re here longer than two weeks…maybe we should talk about whether or not the condoms will even get used?” There’s nothing conventional or normal about the way your relationship has come together, so why should discussing the future be any different? You’ve both already said you want kids. This would just be an…unexpected way to get there.

Dave bites his lip, need and want warring inside him. “I-- I don’t want to start trying when you are still in danger. It will make me even more pissed off at this fucker.” He admits.

“That’s fair.” Placing a soft kiss on his lips, you nudge his nose with yours before pulling away. “Please don’t even feel like you can’t tell me things.”

“You are still a virgin. I can’t sit there and just expect you to be okay with the idea that I want to drag you to the bedroom, throw your legs up on my hips and plant my baby inside you.” He huffs.

“Yeah, I’m still a virgin.” But that sounds like a fucking amazing plan, to be totally honest. “But I’ve been waiting my whole life for you, honey. I’m not afraid of it or putting it off because I wasn’t ready. I’ve just been waiting for my soulmate to share my life with.”

He nods, the rational portion of his brain understand that. “Okay.” He says finally after a moment. “I just didn’t want to overwhelm you.” He murmurs, grinning slightly. “I tend to be a little much, but even I thought it might be too much.”

“If I’m overwhelmed, I’ll tell you.” You promise him. “But the fact that my soulmate wants to give me babies? Kind of a favorite fantasy, honestly.” It might not qualify as a breeding kink in so many words, but you’ve definitely dreamed about it more times than you can count.

“Good.” Dave is relieved but still shoots you a dirty look. “Then I won’t hide it.”

“Good.” You agree, pressing in to leave a kiss on his lips. “It’ll be much more fun.”

“Go dig out your tea to make and the backpack should have you a new computer.” He smirks. “Start plotting while I go outside to make sure you stay cozy.”

“Yes, daddy.” The grin and wink you throw him this time have an entirely new context with this surprising development of his, and you slip back out to the living room to start putting things away with a decided spring in your step.

Dave makes his way out to the wood pile and picks up the axe. He’s already got a good pile, but it’s supposed to be cold, and he’s already seen how much you like the fireplace crackling away. Knowing it will be soothing to you.

The clacking of keyboard keys lasts hours before you dig yourself out of your own brain long enough to check the clock on the wall. You’ve been through two mugs of tea and stoked the fire a few times, but Dave is still outside - and the ticking clock says he’s been out there two hours already. Setting the slim laptop down on the coffee table, you shuffle to the cabin’s backdoor and look out, only to be greeted with the delicious sight of Dave still chopping wood shirtless in the backyard. He’s all broad planes of strong muscle like this, itching every one of those caveman-like urges you get in seeing your soulmate provide for you. Quickly grabbing a bottle of cold water from the fridge, you slip outside and make sure to wait until he’s put the axe down to get his attention, just to be safe. “You look like I’m thirsty as hell,” you tease, offering him the water bottle as you get closer.

Dave huffs out a laugh, wiping his brow on his forehead and hefting the axe into the stump and reaching out to take the water bottle. “Thanks.” He pants, twisting the cap off and eagerly gulping down the water.

“You’ve been at it for hours.” You take the empty bottle back from him when he’s drained it and make a mental note to always bring two out whenever he does this from now on. “You wanna come inside and shower off and I’ll make us some sandwiches for lunch?”

Dave looks at the pile and gives a nod. “Yeah, I just want to stack this up and then I’ll come in. Have it inside the lean to in case the front they were talking about decides to come through.”

“It wouldn’t be so bad to get snowed in.” You muse, humming slightly at the idea. It’s incredibly romantic, in theory. “Nothing to do but snuggle up in front of the fire? Sounds nice.”

“I wouldn’t hate it.” Dave admits, smiling at the way your eyes go soft and dreamy. “Drag the mattress into the room in front of it. All the pillows and blankets.”

His smile makes yours grow wider, it is as infectious as a yawn. “It’s not like we’d be worried about losing cable or internet, either. I can read to you or keep you entertained whenever you want.”

“I think we can find plenty to keep us entertained. Don’t you?” He leers slightly.

“I can think of a few things.” More than a few, and his imagination is a damn good one, too, if this morning is any indication.

Dave works quickly, stacking up the wood inside the small shelter leaning against the back door of the cabin. Making the woodpile easily accessible in the event of a winter storm. Knowing that the two of you are isolated and if the weather gets bad, he's not going to want to leave you for too long. Bringing enough in to restock the basket next to the fireplace before he quits. "Now I'll go get that shower." He tells you, winking as he shuts and locks the door off the shelter.

“I’ll make lunch.” Tempted though you are to want to just sit on the bed and wait for him to be clean again to drag him between the sheets, you remind yourself that he just spent two hours chopping wood - and as much as that sounds like the perfect romance novel set up for fooling around - he’s probably very sore. The fresh groceries dropped off today included packs upon packs of lunch meat and several different bags of chips were piled up in a basket in the kitchen cupboards so you set to work making an easy but tasty meal for when Dave is all cleaned up. There was so lemonade powder somewhere…that would be perfect.

Dave runs a towel through his hair and settles on sweats and a shirt, knowing that he’s not going to do much today other than start teaching you weapon safety. Coming out and smiling at the simple lunch, thick sandwiches and chips with lemonade. “God that looks good.” He compliments.

“I’m glad you think so.” Bopping up from the table to give him a kiss, you settle down again with him beside you and pour your drinks. “The cabin life isn’t half bad so far.”

“At Dave’s Assassin’s Inc, you will find we strive to give our clients the most relaxing survival situations possible.” He jokes, reaching out and squeezing your hip as you huff.

“Probably not the best name for your security firm,” you mumble, taking a bite of your sandwich.

He rolls his eyes at you and picks up his own sandwich. “I know. I was just teasing.”

“So was I.” Your hand reaches out, stroking his arm lightly. “Have you thought about what your going to call it?”

“No clue.” He admits, taking a bite of his sandwich hungrily. “I’ve never been good with that kind of thing.” He tells you after he swallows the bite.

“Could be anything.” You’re hungrier than you realized, and you’re both going after your sandwiches like ravenous kids. “Something normal like York Securities or something a little more out there like…” you hum, thinking for a second. “Like Safety First.”

“Which one would you want?” He asks, curious to see what your answer would be. “Safety First sounds like those baby proofing products they have.”

“Did you guys have any jokes or any designations in the service?” You ask, completely willing to put some thought into this with him. “If it were me hiring you guys, I would really like the fact that it’s a Vet-run business. I’d probably pick you over someone else just for that.”

“Double tap for the win?” Dave asks. “A lot of service jokes aren’t exactly civilian friendly. We have a lot of dark humor.”

“Well, it’s something to think about.” In his line of work, you suppose he would have to have some darker humor in order to get through. “But I think you can’t go wrong with something like York Securities. It’s simple and shows that you have enough pride in what you’re doing to put your own name on it.”

“Yeah, but then there’s my name on something.” Dave shies away from that and hums. “Before we went black ops, we were Alpha team in our unit. Maybe Alpha Securities?”

“And your logo can be a stylized alpha symbol?” It’s easy to remember, won’t make him stare at his own name all the time, and definitely implies a dominance that can only work to their advantage. “I like it.”

“Plus they won’t get butthurt with my name on the door.” Dave scoffs, rolling his eyes about Kovac.

“I’ll still be proud to be the boss’s soulmate. Even without your name everywhere.” That is undeniable, and you can bet already that everything you walk into the building you’ll be beaming with pride.

“Office nooners.” Dave grins wolfishly. He could see you come in with lunch and leaving positively fucked out before he goes back to work.

“Whenever you want.” The thought makes you grin and squeeze your thighs together a little under the table. “Your lunch break can be a very well-rounded meal if you want.”

“Undoubtedly.” Dave hums, picking up his lemonade and taking a sip. “How was your writing between licking the windows?” He teases playfully, fully aware you had been engrossed on your laptop.

“The visual of you chopping wood shirtless will live in my brain rent-free for a very long time.” You promise him after another bite of your sandwich. “I have a very loose outline and I named the main characters, and that’s a lot for just a few hours. I normally take ages to name characters.”

“That’s good.” Dave nods in approval, wanting to take an interest in your interests. While there is no way he could be creative enough to write stories or books, but he wants to support you. “A good outline is the basis for any plan.”

“The love scenes are always a little…freelance.” You admit, flustering behind your lemonade glass. “I don’t really know what they’re going to like until I get to know them.” The slight embarrassment in your expression morphs into a grin. “Like he might have a surprise breeding kink. You never know until you get there.”

He huffs, pursing his lips and glowering at you, but it’s all bluster. “Sorry.” He sarcastically tosses out, just to rile you up. “I’ll keep my thoughts and my sperm to myself then.” He winks just to make sure you know that he is playing.

“Hey, my whole ‘daddy’ thing was as much a surprise to be as it was to you.” One hand reaches for his, squeezing a few of his fingers gently. “Sometimes you don’t know until it’s right there in front of you.”

“I know. I’m just teasing. It’s just with you. So you should feel pretty fucking smug about it.” He squeezes your fingers back and takes the last bite of his sandwich.

You can’t help but smile a little more, tucking it up in the corner of your mouth like a smirk. “I might be less smug when the heartburn is keeping me up at night and I can’t see my feet anymore, but I’m still taking it as a compliment.”

Dave gulps down the rest of the lemonade and smiles at you. “I am going to start bringing out a couple of the weapons I want you to learn.” He tells you, knowing you aren’t going to like it, but he doesn’t want you to assume the worst when he does.

“Okay. I’ll clean up here.” It’s nerve-wracking, to say the least, but you did ask him to teach you. And you meant it when you asked him to teach you. “Bring out whatever I should learn first.”

Dave heads down to the basement and goes over to the gun rack you had either ignored or didn’t notice last night and picks up a handgun that would be easy for you to handle and a rifle.

“Just the basics, right?” You’re nervous when he comes back upstairs, but justifiably so. Having cleaned up all the remnants of your meal and your writing spree, the main room of the cabin is empty except for furniture because you have no idea how much space any of this will even require.

“The first thing is weapons safety.” Dave tells you serious. “Rule one - treat every weapon you come across as if it is loaded. Not doing that, even as an experienced firearms handler, accounts for the majority of accidental deaths.” He explains. “Doesn’t matter if I tell you the gun is clear. Until you clear it yourself, it’s loaded. Got it?”

“Got it.” You can’t imagine ever being blasé about a gun, but familiarity does tend to breed complacency, you suppose.

Dave sets the rifle down on the table, muzzle pointed towards the door and holds up the handgun. “This is your basic pistol.” He teaches you. Putting his thumb on a button on the handle he pushes it, making the magazine spring out about an inch from bottom. “This button ejects the magazine, pull that out and then you pull back the slide to make sure there isn’t a round in the chamber.” He shows you that there was one and pops it out into his hand and locks the slide back so it is open and you can see into the weapon. “This is now cleared, you can see there is no bullet in it.”

“Okay.” The way your heart is hammering isn’t pleasant, but this is possibly the most important thing to learn if you’re going to have guns in the house in the future so you remind yourself to focus. “Okay. Got it.”

Dave knows you are uneasy but he also knows that it could be life or death. “Rule two - never point a weapon at something, anything, you are not willing to kill.”

“Makes sense.” Which basically means you’ll be pointing it at nothing but inanimate targets, but again, that’s okay.

Dave smiles at you patiently. “Rule three - keep your finger off the trigger until you are ready to fire. That shit in movies where they are leaning on the trigger all the time? Horseshit amateur bullshit.” He releases the slide and cups the bottom of the grip and shows you how he rests his finger along the weapon. “Like this, baby.”

“Every weapon is loaded until you clear it yourself. Never point at something you’re not willing to k-kill.” You hate yourself for the momentary stammer but it’s not a word you’ll ever get used to saying with seriousness. “And keep your finger off the trigger until you’re ready to fire.”

“Good girl.” He praises you, knowing you are so far out of your comfort zone you might as well be on the moon. “Rule four - be aware of your target and what is behind them.” He murmurs softly. “You don’t want to shoot someone and take out someone innocent because they are in the wrong spot.”

“Right.” Collateral damage is a plot line in so many stories and it’s almost what you were - albeit in a different way. You can’t even imagine being responsible for that kind of loss in real life. “Keep going, I know there’s more.”

“There are but those are the main four.” He tells you. “That’s what I had drilled into my head before I was allowed to touch a weapon.”

It’s all a tiny bit overwhelming, but you know that actually putting your hands on one of these pieces is going to give you anxiety for days, so you swallow it and nod again. “The very basic of the basics. Got it.”

“Most of the weight comes from the bullets. Here, feel how light the gun is empty.” He slides an empty magazine into the gun and turns it around to hand it to you by the muzzle, pointed at the floor.

It’s okay. It’s empty. It’s totally safe. You tell yourself on repeat as you carefully wrap your fingers around the cold metal. It’s extremely light, compared to how heavy it looks before you touch it, but you hand it back quickly. “It’s definitely light,” you agree, knowing he can see how anxious even that made you. You’re going to have to get over it, you know that.

“Do you want to stop?” He doesn’t want you having a panic attack over a weapons safety class. Not when you’ve already been through enough for most people in the past week.

“Am I the weakest person in the world if I say yes?” The last thing you want is for him to think less of you, but having an actual real-life handgun in your hand with a rifle out in front of you is giving you flashbacks to last night. “It’s just…it’s a lot…”

“No.” He’s adamant that things happen at your pace, you are not a soldier and shouldn’t be treated like one. “We can be done for now.” He reaches over and carefully takes the weapon from you.

“I’m sorry.” Though you genuinely feel like you could curl into yourself and evaporate, all you do is wipe your hands thoroughly on your new jeans and stifle a sniffle. “I’ll get over feeling weird about it, I promise.”

“Don’t apologize.” Dave sets the gun down on the table and steps over to you, wrapping you up in his arms. “Never apologize to me about something like this. In a perfect world, you would never have to hold one, baby.”

“I just don’t want you to be disappointed,” you admit, face buried in his chest for comfort. The fact that this is even on your radar is still unbelievable to you and right now it’s just too much.

“You aren’t going to disappoint me.” Dave tuts, rubbing your back soothingly. “You don’t have to worry about that. Baby, I don’t want you to ever have to actually use one beyond target practice.”

“I don’t either.” That’s probably abundantly obvious and you sniffle when you mean to huff at yourself. “It’s just a lot all at once, I think…making me think about last night and…” This time the sniffle is very real, and you can’t stifle it. “And all I can think about is if you had leaned in to me for that kiss instead of pulling me to you, they would have gotten both of us.”

He sighs softly, tightening his hold on you. “That didn’t happen baby.” He reminds you. “We are right here. Together. And we are going to stay that way.” He murmurs, wishing he knew how to make you relax. “Let me out them away and we can pretend they don’t exist for a bit, okay?”

“Okay.” Nodding meekly against his chest is the best You can manage right now, and you swear to yourself that you’ll figure out a way to make it up to him even though he says you don’t have to. Even if it’s just an extra nice dinner and head, he still deserves it.

Dave presses his lips to the top of your head and pulls away after another few seconds. “How does a nap sound?” He suggests. “We don’t have anything else that needs doing right now.”

“That sounds good.” Just being next to him - with him, in the safety of his arms - sounds like the only actual place where you’ll find any peace right now. “I’ll meet you in the bedroom?”

“That sounds good, baby.” He nods and turns you around and pats you on the butt before he picks up the weapons again.

There is a suspicious lack of pajamas in the clothes that his teammates brought for you, with the only things coming close being a few t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants, and you swap out the sweater you put on earlier for a t-shirt and shuck your jeans in favor of the sweats before crawling under the covers.

Dave checks the doors and locks again, habit even though he knows everything is good. Coming back into the bedroom and smiling when he sees you already tucked in. “Comfortable?” He asks, starting to pull of the sweats and t-shirt. He hates sleeping in clothes when he doesn’t have to.

“Your boys intentionally didn’t pack any pajamas for me,” you tell him with amusement. “I think they’re trying to give you an edge.”

Dave smirks and slides under the covers. “They are good men.”

“They want you to be happy.” If there’s one thing you know about them, especially after talking to them today, it’s how much they care about Dave.

“Just like we will all help Resnick, when his ugly ass finds his soulmate.” Dave chuckles, moving closer to you and giving you an amused look when he feels your sweats.

“It’s the closest thing to pjs that was on the bag,” you defend, doing him your best doe eyes. “I didn’t want you to think I just expected you to be intimate somehow every time we got into a bed together…”

“Baby, just being in bed with you is intimate.” He huffs. “If I was sharing a bed with Ari I damn sure wouldn’t be eager to cuddle unless the temperature was a hell of a lot colder in here.”

“Not your type?” A teasing grin tucks itself into the corner of your mouth.

“Definitely not.” Dave’s grin is accompanied by a slight wrinkle of his nose. “Man hogs the covers.”

“I’d rather hog your body heat than the covers.” You vow, snuggling up to his side immediately. It may only be two nights that you’ve slept beside him but it already feels like the exact place you’re meant to be. “Much more fun for keeping warm.”

“Much more fun.” He agrees, hand under you immediately moving up under your shirt to caress your back. “Bra?” He frowns, feeling the band. “Why the hell are you still wearing it?”

“New ones need breaking in. Like shoes.” It’s an annoying truth and you shrug slightly. “But you can undo it, it’s fine.”

He quickly hooks his finger under the four hook and eye clasps and undoes them. “Let the titties breathe during nap time.” He teases.

“Next thing you’re going to be telling me is that the pussy should breath during nap time, too,” you joke, wiggling a little to get your arms out of the loose bra straps so you can toss it aside.

“I - you know…I’m sure that has to be backed by science.” He chuckles and sighs contentedly when you lean against him again.

“You’re sure, huh?” A dramatic little sigh and a playful roll of your eyes have him laughing again as you shimmy out of your sweatpants and panties. “Well, I wouldn’t want to go against science.”

“I love science.” He breathes out, reaching for a handful of your ass the second you have it available. “Best fucking thing ever.”

“Oh yeah?” It actually is a little chilly in only a t-shirt, and you cozy up to Dave’s side as tightly as you can under the blanket. “I’m glad you think so.”

He just hums, feeling you shiver and he tangles his legs with yours. Leaning back against the pillows and relaxing. “You’re welcome to throw a leg over me.”

“I thought we were gonna nap?” You tease, slipping just your calf over his so you don’t put too much weight on him but still get a little more warmth.

“We are going to nap.” Dave huffs, reaching down and pulling your leg up more. “But I want my girl to be warm and comfortable.”

Huffing at him slightly, you wind your arm around his waist and let your head lie comfortably on his shoulder. With him in absolutely nothing and you in just a t-shirt, warm skin connected with chilled skin easily and quickly enough that you’re always significantly warmer than you were a few minutes ago. “I love you, too,” you mumble sheepishly, a little too embarrassed to admit that yes - this is much better.

“I know you do.” Dave’s eyes are closed and there is a smile on his face. Fingers stroking up and down your leg, just needing to touch you and his hand on your back just splays across your skin like a warm anchor to keep you against him.

“Get some sleep, baby.” Like clockwork, the sentence ends in a yawn and you hug him tight. “Neither one of us slept well last night.”

“Sleep well, beautiful.” Dave murmurs softly, relaxing and dozing off quickly for the lack of sleep and hours of hard labor.

______

Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @katheriner1999 @littlemousedroid @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog

KW: @evyiione @graphitegator @bruxasolta @missredherring @writeforfandoms @sj-draws00 @whiskeyshoneybee @randeerenae @pagannightwitch @what-iwish-you-knew @mrsparknuts @harriedandharassed

My Masterlist!

#Pedro Pascal #Pedro Pascal character fanfiction #Pedro Pascal fanfic #Dave York #Dave York x reader #Dave York x you #Dave York x female reader #plus size reader #Equalizer 2 #soulmate au #dave york pit #suburban murder daddy

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babyboibucky · 3 years

Text

Deserve Better

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky disappeared and came back only to say goodbye.

Word Count: 2,887

Warnings: angsty angsty angsty angsty angsty

A/N: Post-endgame timeline with lotsa angst! Included Andy Barber here because why the fuck not but he’s really not a major character lol

Deserve Better || Undeserving || Deserve The Best

MAIN MASTERLIST

The day you got Bucky back was the same day he said goodbye. He left you— said it was for the best— just as when your fingertips touched him for the first time after five years of longing.

Your reunion with Bucky after the snap was nothing like the movies, far from it actually. A lot of things happened when he was snapped back, in between the battle with Thanos and Tony’s funeral. Besides, you weren’t an Avenger; you didn’t work for SHIELD nor the CIA. In fact, you remained oblivious of the battle that was going on until the moment of chaos caused by the sudden reappearances of half of the world’s population.

And then you received a message from Steve, about the tragedy and the sacrifice of Tony Stark. He was inviting you to the funeral and as much as you felt devastated from the loss of a hero, you couldn’t help but focus your attention on the last line of Steve’s message.

Bucky’s going to be there too. He’s back. He needs you to be there with him.

It wasn’t until the funeral was over that you finally got to have Bucky all to yourself. You had locked gazes when you arrived and staring back into his beautiful blue eyes again made your knees weak.

Bucky was really back.

“Hi.” He greeted you first, his voice remained the same— soft and gentle.

One word was enough to make you feel the warmth of his existence. Hearing him, seeing him again felt like finally coming home after a very long, tiring day.

“Hi, Buck.” You whispered.

Bucky’s smile was all it took for the dam to finally break. You’d burst into tears right then and there and you were more than ready to feel his arms around you after years of hugging yourself to sleep during his absence.

But the warmth never came. If any, Bucky stopped himself from doing so. You frowned when he took a step back from you, extending his metal arm to keep you at a certain length away from him.

“I’m sorry.” He uttered, refusing to meet your gaze.

“What do you mean?”

“I have to go.” He explained, gently squeezing your arm before rubbing circles on your skin using his thumb.

You didn’t understand why Bucky needed to go when he just got back. You just got him back. You had spent years crying over his disappearance only for him to come back and disappear again?

Bucky explained that he thought he got better but things have become so vastly different after the snap that it left him feeling broken and different again. He told you about Steve’s decision to go back in time, never to return again. How Tony’s death made him feel like it was too late to set things straight and how he would probably carry the guilt and regret from not being able to apologize for what he had done.

“I’ll help you, Buck. We’ll work through this together. I want to be by your side when things get better.” You insisted, tears blurring your vision as you tried to reach for Bucky, wanting to feel him again after such a long time.

But Bucky kept on moving away from you, he kept on pushing you away and you wanted to understand why he wouldn’t let you touch him.

“I’ll only hurt you, I don’t want that to happen. I want to get better because you deserve better. But I can’t do that with you because this...this is something that I gotta figure out by myself.” He further explained.

You shook your head, unable to accept his decision. “Buck...I don’t think I can lose you again. I just got you back...I can’t afford to lose you again, please?”

When you attempted to reach for Bucky’s hand, he finally let you. You quickly entwined your fingers through his metal ones and savored how they felt against your skin. They were cold as usual, but Bucky always oozed a certain warmth that made you feel safe.

But now they’re just that— cold and hard.

“I love you. I’ll wait, Bucky.” You murmured and tugged at his hand before he could even let you go.

Bucky smiled sadly at you, “You don’t have to, doll.”

You shook your head and brought Bucky’s hand to your lips as you cried, “I want to. And I will.”

Pressing one final kiss on his hard knuckles, you watched Bucky slip his hand away from yours before turning around to leave. You felt your chest tighten as if you lost all the oxygen in your lungs the same way you lost Bucky.

Losing him the second time around proved to be even more painful. Because this time, he didn’t just disappear.

He walked away.

You waited for Bucky to come home to you for days and weeks until they turned into months...and then years. Still, no Bucky walked through your doorstep but you never stopped hoping.

Sleep was such a rare occurrence to you since Bucky walked away. How do you honestly cope with the loss of someone when you haven’t even healed yet from his first disappearance? You wanted to get mad at him, curse him for suddenly deciding to leave you. But you felt selfish for even thinking about that, because Bucky left to better himself.

To be better for you. He said so himself.

So you kept waiting for him to come back. You made it your reason to keep going. You looked forward to the day you’d hear your door open followed by his heavy foot steps. You wondered, would he smell the same then? Would he still be using your favorite perfume on him? One that smelled like cedar wood and mint and well, Bucky. Would his hair still be of the same length? What about his beard? Would he shave them off before coming back home?

How about his gaze? Would his blue ones still look at you as if you were his moon?

As much as these thoughts made you miss him more, they were the ones that you held onto. They were like your glimmer of hope on nights you were the loneliest, on nights you cried and dreamt of his return only to wake up to an empty, cold space beside you.

You held onto these thoughts every single day in hopes of them becoming real soon enough.

People have told you to move on, to not waste your time waiting for someone who walked away just like that. But you trusted Bucky when he said he wanted to be better because you deserved better. You couldn’t move on, not from Bucky.

You love him with your entire being, so much that his absence caused you physical pain too. You couldn’t even find the right words to describe how much you love Bucky.

In the three years that you spent waiting, you’d met a lot of people too. People who showed interest but none of them really won you over.

You’d met a man named Andy through work. He was a lawyer and was dealing with his own divorce. The connection was there and you wouldn’t deny that.

Two people dealing with the grief from losing someone they love, it wasn’t that hard not to find a common ground. And you did find some solace in Andy and him in you. But it was just that, nothing more and nothing less.

“How has it been?” You asked Andy after he had settled into the booth across of you.

The restaurant was surprisingly scarce on a Sunday morning. Usually there were plenty of customers, their chatters overpowering the soft music playing in the background. Now, it was peaceful and the radio was turned off. There were only the clinks of plates of being set on tables and the footsteps of the staff walking around the place as they attended to the few customers around.

It was serene and peaceful, pretty much like Andy’s aura when he arrived.

“I wouldn’t say I’m fine but I guess I’m at a much better place now than before.” He said with a nod, as if he was finally agreeing with himself after questioning his emotions for the past few months.

You offered a kind smile and placed a hand on top of his, “It shows, Andy. I’m glad. I’m happy for you.” You said.

He had been going through a lot of emotions since he signed the divorce papers. He didn’t want to but knew it was for the best. Andy had a son, Jacob, and he didn’t want for his son to grow up in an environment where his parents no longer slept on the same bed. As much as he loved Laurie, the relationship was no longer working and was becoming toxic the more they stayed together.

“And you?” Andy asked back before calling the waiter.

You let out a deep breath, “Still waiting.” You chuckled as your stared at your hand that remained on top of Andy’s.

Andy spared you an apologetic glance but nodded, “I do hope he knows how lucky he is.” He said, turning his palm up so he could hold your hand.

To others, the gesture may seem romantic but it really wasn’t. You and Andy both knew that despite the similarities and the comfort you found in each other, the both of you were not meant to be together in that way.

Your heart still belonged to Bucky after all.

When you received an invitation from Sam Wilson, you felt confused and excited. There was going to be a huge gala at the compound to honor Steve Rogers’ legacy as Captain America.

You’d heard the news about Steve’s passing not long after he went back in time. He finally got to live the life he deserved and when he came back, it was as if everything had been corrected. He may no longer be the super soldier that many knew but he remained the same person— but he wasn’t the man out of time anymore. Despite his white hair and wrinkles, Steve looked the happiest he had ever been.

You wondered how Bucky coped up with such a huge loss, you always worried for him.

It sparked debate though, Steve’s decision to leave the Avengers. Some got angry, said that Steve was selfish for doing that. Others showed sympathy, that Steve didn’t owe the world anything. He’d spent a lifetime fighting for everyone. It was time that he fought for himself and what he deserved. And Sam fought just as hard for Steve’s legacy and finally, all his hard work finally paid off.

What confused you was whether Bucky was going to be there? Does he know about the gala? Was he finally back? If he was, why hasn’t he come home to you yet? You had so many questions that you wanted to ask.

The answers though, were literally in the palm of your hand— the invitation.

It was no surprise how big the gala was. Just on your way inside, you’d already come across a lot of big personalities. There were politicians and popular celebrities too. You felt intimidated given that you went by yourself and that you weren’t really part of their world.

You were just you, someone who had fallen in love with one Bucky Barnes who introduced you to the world of superheroes. The rest was history.

“I’m so glad you’re here!” You turned around and found Sam approaching you with a huge smile.

You embraced him and smiled as you pulled away, “I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” You told him.

It was Steve and Sam that you’d met first and they were nothing but kind to you. Despite being well, ordinary, they welcomed you like their own when Bucky had introduced you.

Sam’s expression changed at your response, “I honestly thought that you wouldn’t show up after Bucky said—“

“Bucky?” You immediately cut him off upon hearing his name.

“Bucky’s back?” You asked and Sam had never looked more confused as ever.

He carefully nodded, brows knitting together as he frantically looked around. “I thought you knew about it.”

“How long? How long has it been since he came back, Sam?” You probed, feeling your throat constricting at the unexpected revelation.

Sam merely looked at you with what seemed to be pity. Why? Why was he looking at you like he was sorry? And why didn’t Bucky tell you when he came back? Was he simply not ready? Or was he waiting for the right time?

“Sam, how long?” You asked again, voice firmer this time around.

“A year ago. He decided to join the Avengers but wanted to undergo formal training before taking on the responsibility of one.” He responded.

You opened your mouth to say something but it’s as if your whole body was paralyzed. He had been back for an entire year now...and yet he kept you waiting?

A hand on your arm pulled you back to the surface, looking up at Sam you shook your head in utter confusion.

“I don’t understand why he didn’t tell me.”

Sam sighed, “I thought you knew. He said he saw you and—“

Sam’s words died on his tongue when he saw that your attention was no longer on him. Following the line of your sight, Sam turned around and saw that Bucky had walked into the venue. He swallowed and couldn’t hide the guilt he felt from assuming that you knew about his return. Before he could apologize, you’d brushed past him as you kept your gaze on Bucky.

Why he didn’t inform you of his return was beyond you and to be honest, you couldn’t bring yourself to care about it for now. Because Bucky was right in front of you and it felt like forever since you last saw him.

A lot has changed. He chopped off his hair but he still sported some scruff. Bucky looked closer to his younger self back in the 40’s. You remembered the conversation you had with him about cutting his hair.

“Should I cut it?” Bucky stood in your bathroom, observing his long locks in the mirror as he ran his fingers through them.

You walked over to him, hugging him from behind and pressing your lips on his back before moving to stand beside him.

“Do you want to?” you asked.

Bucky scrunched his nose, “Maybe in the future. I do miss my hair back then.” he smiled.

You chuckled, “Back when Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes used to sweep the ladies off of their feet?” you teased.

Bucky turned to you and wrapped an arm around your wait pulling you closer to kiss your lips, “Hmm, I wanna see if that hair will have the same effect on you.” he said and kissed your cheek.

You hummed as you caressed his face with your delicate hands, “I’d like to see that too, but maybe you should keep the scruff.”

But it wasn’t just his hair that changed. It was his entire demeanor— his aura seemed a lot lighter now, he seemed happier and confident. You knew it for a fact because he wasn’t wearing a glove to hide his metal hand. It was out on display for everyone to see and shake, apparently.

You watched in awe as Bucky interacted with the people around him. He used to avoid eye contact with strangers but now he seemed relaxed doing so. Although he would still open and close his metal hand, something he did whenever he was anxious. The crowd still made him uncomfortable but he’s shown a lot of improvement since then.

The question as to why he never told you about his return continued to linger in the back of your head. But you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling from ear to ear, eyes brimming with tears as you quickened your steps.

Your Bucky was finally back.

And then the world seemed to have stopped when a certain blonde walked over to Bucky, her hand sliding over to his cheek as she leaned up to press a quick peck on his lips.

You knew her of course, Sharon Carter; and you knew about her and Steve. It was Bucky himself who told you about them and how proud he was that Steve finally decided to try his luck at romance. Which is why you felt even more appalled at the scene playing before you.

The way Bucky slid an arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him and how he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. How he was smiling down at her, whispering to her ear as they laughed.

Bucky was in love with Sharon. You didn’t have to ask him that anymore because he was looking at her like she was his moon, his source of light in the darkness.

You knew that because he looked at you the same way, back when you still had his heart.

Suddenly, the questions plaguing your mind found their answers. You understood now why he never came home to you.

He did get better, you could tell that by the way he smiled and laughed.

Bucky was better now, but not for you. At least, not anymore.

Everything Bucky Tag List:

@ddowii @jessou893 @stealapizzamyheart @bagelofthelord @mxnt @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @jeeperky @ohladymacbeth @wildflowergubler @supraveng @twinerd14 @buckysmar @bakugouswh0r3

#bbbwrites #oneshots: bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky #bucky fic #bucky angst #bucky x you #bucky x reader #sebastian stan

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char-lotta · 3 years

Text

Never alone

Pairing: Jake x MC

Words: 4,1 k

Summary: Someone couldn’t handle herself while texting Jake and there is no turning back.

Warnings: If sex scenes aren’t your thing, this fic isn’t for you. 🔥

My native language isn't english, so forgive me the possible grammar errors.

Never alone

Jake: Can you focus on what we are doing, please?

You read the message and something large clogged your throat. Is it possible that he knew what you were doing?

MC: I am focused. I just got distracted for a second, sorry about that.

Jake: Good. So, are you on board for this? It isn’t too hard task for you?

Oh yes, it is, and you know it. How can I possible focus on anything while discussing with you? It was so strange feeling, since you had never seen his face, but you imagined him as tall, with dark hair and well-built. You had dreamt about him for weeks now, even while you were awake. It has almost become an obsession to you, and you checked your phone probably a hundred times a day, just to see those sweet three words… Jake is online.

MC: So, what is exactly you want me to do?

You saw the pencil mark as a sign that he was writing and apparently deleting the written message few times. There was this tingling feeling in your toes and you felt slightly nauseous. You were longing for a message, where he would tell you to take off your shirt and give you a new instruction. You knew that he could told you to do anything, and you would oblige easily without a doubt. Your nipples went hard even for that thought and you had this longing sensation, like an ache, between your legs, demanding and pulsating. The top you were wearing was a long gone and you laid on your back on the sofa and the only light in the room was the light coming from your phone. Your hands wandered through your body with light brushes, occasionally rubbing your breasts, and you closed your eyes. You imaged that those hands weren’t yours, but Jake’s. You drew circles with your fingers at the surface of your skin, ending up on the waist band of your panties. Slowly, you touched yourself in a trembling hand, and small moan escaped through your lips, waking you up from this daydream and the imaginary picture of Jake in your mind vanished. Frustrated, you took your hand away and put the shirt back on. But he would never do that, and you just knew it. You had confessed that you liked him, and he said that he liked you too. The warming feel with those words was overwhelming and you had returned them many times, just to remind yourself that he had feelings for you too. But I like you too, is such a vague impression after all and could be just a compliment too. How could this ever work since you didn’t even know where he was?

Jake: I don’t want you to do anything what compromises your safety. You know that, right?

Jake: So, forget all your plans going there loudly with cavalry. Since all you have, is me, and I hardly am “the cavalry”.

But you are all I need and all I want, you wanted to respond. But something held you back, and you were afraid that Jake would go offline. You tucked a lost strand of hair back to behind your ear and sighted. Why, why on earth this was so fucking hard. And for god’s sake, you two were just texting and you couldn’t contain yourself. You imagined meeting Jake in person, but how embarrassed you would feel, since you could not even say those things via text, how could you ever say them aloud?

MC: I do know that. I will be discreet, no one will see me.

Jake: Be careful. We will talk again after your mission.

You had feeling that your discussion was coming to an end and the tears started blurring your sight. You just wanted to be close to him, even though it was in opposite ends of two screens between you two. You had been in this situation many times before, and each time it felt harder. It was so utterly crushing to lose contact now and you typed so quickly that you didn’t have time to even think about what you should say to him. Knowing that you were alone the next few weeks.

MC: Don’t go. Just don’t leave me now. I miss you so much. I love you. Don’t go.

When you saw your own words flashing through the screen and realized that you had lost your self-discipline, those tears that you had tried to not let loose, came like spring water, draining your cheeks. You didn’t want to look what Jake replied (or did he even reply?) and you felt so powerless and weak, and those feelings had been inside you for a very long time suppressed. You threw your phone back at the sofa and paced around your living room, cursing under your breath. You fucking idiot, why would you say that? He doesn’t love you back, you stupid girl. If he would, he would have come and get you already.

You heard that you got messages, multiple messages, but you didn’t want to see them. Jake was probably telling her now that they two together were too dangerous and he was wanted by the government… But you didn’t care. If he just would have asked, you would give up your life as you know it without a hesitation. You could move and go no-contact with your friends and family, you would give up your job, that you loved. Because you loved him more.

You loved him.

And this was the thought last on your mind when you cried yourself to sleep.

****

You had no idea what time it was, but it was night since it was so dark that you couldn’t see anything. The silence was overwhelming and pressuring, and you laid without moving on your bed covers, and suddenly you just knew, that you were not alone. The only noise in you could hear was your own breathing and you stopped it for a second; but you couldn’t hear anything. You opened your eyes carefully and looked your apartment. Since you lived in a studio, you could see the whole room from your bed. Your heart was pounding so loud and fast that you were afraid it would escape through your ribcage any second now.

You looked thoroughly the room and you couldn’t see anyone or anything moving. Slowly you pulled out from your bed and turned the light on. There was no one in the room. You searched your apartment cautiously, but there was nothing out of the ordinary to be seen. Just when you were going back to bed, you noticed that the window in the separate kitchen was open. Had you forgot to close it? You looked from your window to the yard, but there was nothing. You shut the window second time that night and stared at the darkness, but still, there was nothing to be seen. Remembering last nights text messages made you frown, but you would deal it in the morning. You yawned and turned around.

Just when you thought you couldn’t handle your heart anymore, it stopped and felt ice-cold. There was this dark figure in the corner, just a few footsteps from you. You saw the dark figure was a man with a hood and it was covering his face, so you couldn’t see who he was. But you didn’t need the to see anything more, because you knew who was standing in your home instantly. It just wasn’t possible...

“Jake?” you whispered in utter disbelief. This must be a dream. You pinched yourself from your thigh so forcefully, that it hurt like a hell.

The hooded figure seemed to be alarmed and hesitant, but he didn’t move or say anything.

“Jake? Is it really you?” you asked softly, and the man slowly nodded. The movement of his head was so small, that you weren’t sure if you were seeing correctly. You had no idea what to say anymore, this situation had surprised you fully. You had had these dreams, but now when he was really here, you were so lost on what to do.

“Has something happened?” you asked, voice trembling. Your knees felt that they were going to betray you any moment now. Suddenly the man made a noise, and it took a while when you understood, that he was actually laughing. The laugh didn’t sound joyful, it was more a bitter tone.

“Apparently I have gone mad”, he said in a raspy voice. “I swore that I would protect you and here I am, putting you a more danger that you ever have been.”

You shifted the weight of you to another foot, trying to understand what Jake had just said.

“What do you mean by that? How am I in danger?”

“What else this could be? I am wanted by all kind of people and none of them are on the good side” Jake spat angrily, and you felt his eyes piercing you, even though you couldn’t see his eyes. You suddenly came very, very aware that you didn’t have any trousers on, just the panties. Your hands moved to cover yourself but at the same time, you had dreaded this moment since you ever had chatted with him in the first place. But why was he so angry?

“Could I see your face?” you asked, and you didn’t recognize your voice anymore. Since when you had sounded like that? Maybe your wildest dreams were happening, and you couldn’t believe it.

“No.” His voice was harsh and cold. You felt instant disappointment roaming thorough your body, crushing your hopes.

“But why? You can see mine.”

“Let’s not make this any more complicated than it is”, he frowned and took a step back, adding more shadows in his figure.

“Why are you here then?” The now unrecognizable voice was mad. You felt anger rising somewhere inside of you, making room for itself pushing all the hopeful thoughts aside. “Why the fuck are you in my home in the middle of the night if I can’t even see you?”

Overwhelmed, you turned around and felt so frustrated. Jake was in your home; you finally had met him, and he forbid you to even look at him. This was nothing like you had imagined, there was nothing romantic in this situation.

“I needed to see you”, you heard him answer and waited more. His voice was not so harsh anymore, but maybe… desperate? You peeked him with corner of your eye. He hadn’t move from his spot.

“Why would you say those things? Why didn’t you answer my messages anymore?” he asked and now he’s voice was definitely trembling. You thought that he was longing something and didn’t know if you could give it to him. You turned back to him and took a step closer to him. You slowly reached your hand towards him, but he didn’t budge. For a second you remembered your semi-nakedness but who the fuck cares. This was more important than a missing pair of jeans.

“Jake”, you said lightly and even saying his name aloud gave you a light blush. Get yourself together, you command yourself. “Are you that daft?” you burst, and this was clearly not the answer Jake had expected since you heard offended huff from the darkness.

“I was so embarrassed with my own words, who betrayed me coming out like that, because I had agreed with myself that I would not vocalize my feelings towards you. But I do love you which is absolutely crazy and how on earth I could love something I haven’t never seen or heard before? That would freak out anyone, let alone you, who is forced to work with me to find his sister” you ranted, now looking on anything else except him.

“I don’t expect you to love me back, and I am so sorry for distracting our search towards Hannah. I won’t do it again, I promise. We can never talk about this incident again.” You feel those stupid tears again and flickered your eyes. Oh no, don’t cry NOW!

Everyone who has ever heard silence, know how disturbing it can be. The silence what landed between you and Jake was so thick and full of fear and anxiousness and you waited -, no, - you feared his response. It felt like a small eternity when he finally responded.

“MC…” he said, and that was all he said. Nothing else. You waited but there was nothing more. Feeling so defeated and humiliated, you just wanted to get away from him and started walking out of the kitchen.

But he finally grabbed your hand and pulled you in to the shadows with him. Your confused brain could only register his musky smell and his other hand on your lower back when he pulled you closer. His lips carefully brushed yours and your head felt like exploding. Adrenaline flushed through your veins so fast that it made you feel dizzy, and you grasped his hoodie to stay balanced. You leaned towards him and felt his breath on your face, and you opened your lips, welcoming his.

You had never been kissed like that and it had never felt so good. His lips were demanding, and his grip tightened on your hand; your hands were in his hair, trying to get him closer. You both gasped air between the kisses and his hand moved from your back to your bottom, and you tangled your leg behind his. He let go of your hand and lifted you to his lap and turned you two around landing you on the counter top and you could hear cutlery dropping on the floor. Your brains screamed with joy and happiness, wishing this moment could continue forever. There was only you and Jake in this world, and nothing couldn’t stop you two, you wouldn’t care if the Man Without a Face would have entered the room.

He moved his lips from your mouth to your neck and every kiss he made, left you with a burning sensation and you could not do anything else than moan. You could feel his lips changing from gently kisses to more intense and rougher around your neck and he nibbled behind your earlobe quite forcefully.

“Jake…” you moaned again with pleasure and sent your hands exploring his body, you just wanted to have all of him.

“This is incredibly stupid” you heard him say somewhere lower and you can’t help but giggle a bit. “Why does it feel so good then?” you asked, and he answered by cupping your breast and squeezing it gently and sucked your earlobe at the same time. You could see that the darkness had lifted since moon was shining from the window, lighting the room. He had a dark hair, as you had imagined, and it seemed that other of your predictions had done well too. Jake let go of your ear and looked at you and you could see his blue eyes were full of lust and something else… He stroked your cheek with his thumb, and you pulled him closer between your legs with your feet.

“You are so fucking beautiful, MC”, he said in a raspy voice, still looking at you. “But I did actually know that already. I just needed to see you with my own eyes”. I presumed that he meant that he had seen my social media profiles, and probably something else, that I wasn’t aware of, since he was a hacker.

“I presume that I am not alone with my feelings?” you asked and did not know, what made you so courageous. You two looked each other and time had stopped. Still caressing your cheek, Jake sighed.

“I am not good with expressing emotions. And still, this is incredibly stupid.”

Now was your turn feel offended. How could this burning feeling inside of you be stupid? And why couldn’t he just admit that they were more than pen pals from mystery series of Duskwood? Maybe he didn’t care you as much as you liked to think.

“Yeah, maybe you are right”, you said in a hurt tone and lowered your gaze. “If I am the only one here with feelings, this is going to be a torture for me if we continue.” You let your hands rest on your lap.

“Who’s the daft now?” Jake asked amused and lifted up your chin, forcing you to look at him. “I didn’t come all the way here to tell you I didn’t love you.”

“What are you telling me then?” You didn’t dare to hope for any answer. Jake kissed you again, but you broke the kiss soon (even though it was incredibly hard) and looked him desperate.

“Jake… Please”, you whispered.

He looked you and looked defeated.

“If I say it, there’s no turning back. I feel like I’m trapping you with me, and trust me, it isn’t comfortable place to be in life at this moment.”

“I want to be trapped with you with every cell of my body” you assured him quickly. And you meant every word you said, because this, right here, was where you wanted to be. With Jake.

“I…” he started, and you stopped breathing. You had longed for this moment ages and could not believe that this was happening. Your whole body waited for he to continue his sentence.

“I never want to be separated from you” he whispered. “You are amazing and beautiful, and still so frustrating and stubborn. I came here to tell you that we are better off just friends for both of our protection, but now I am with you and you are just… you! You just look at me and I forget everything I was supposed to say and all I want to do is pull you closer and never let go.”

You exhaled and noticed that he was shaking, and you were surprised to see that you were too. “Well then don’t let go”, you whispered back.

He grabbed your waist and shift you closer to him and kissed you passionately, your tongue met his. He nibbled your lower lip, and his hands were wandering again through your body. You wanted to be touched everywhere by him and leaned little bit back so there was room for his hands. He took eagerly your given chance and moved his hands under your shirt. You felt dizzy again and didn’t even notice that you were moaning again when his lips found a way to your cleavage. He looked up as a gesture making sure that this was okay to you.

“Don't you dare to stop”, you gasped.

He didn’t need more confirmation and pulled your shirt up, revealing your upper body. He took a moment to look at you properly and you felt something getting harder inside of his trousers. Your thoughts moved to the forward where he would finally enter you and the pulsating, aching feeling was back. Jake took your nipple between his lips and sucked it gently and for a moment you were so sure, that you would pass out for the pleasure. He caressed you with his hands and mouth, moving the hands slowly to the waistband of your panties. You tried to take of his shirt, but he gently pushed your hands off back to the counter top as he focused on you; you had no choice than enjoy the ride.

His fingers felt warm when he finally touched you under the panties. You knew that you were soaking wet, but when he started rubbing your clit, you could see the star constellations. Your moans weren’t subtle anymore, and with each noise you made, he seemed to get more fuel on his actions. Jake pulled your panties off easily, revealing you completely. He took he’s moment again to admire you and before you knew, he was continuing rubbing your clit with his thumb and the other hands fingers were inside you, fastening the pace with every moan you let slip. You could feel his tongue on your nipple again and you grabbed his hair. All you felt was pleasure, you had never felt so good in your life; all your emotions from last month while texting Jake and developing one-sided feelings towards him came to final conclusion – you weren’t alone in this after all, and this made you so utterly happy. Your vision started to blur, and you lost your sense of everything else except the overwhelming feeling of relieve when you orgasmed. When you finally came back to your senses, you felt Jake gently lightening his pressure on you and you breathed heavily, trying to get some air. Your smile was contagious, and Jake grinned while watching you.

“What?”

“Like I said”, he murmured, “you are amazing.”

You pulled him for a kiss which deepened shortly. At the same time, your hands found his belt and you started undressing him with his help. When you got rid of his shirt, you saw scars on his torso, and you looked them in confusion.

“Another time, okay?” Jake asked and you nodded and same time you felt butterflies in the bottom of your stomach. Another time…

He opened his belt and lowered his trousers revealing black underwear with a promising bulge in the groin, and you could not wait to get rid of these barriers anymore, Jake was laughing for your enthusiasm and this time, the laugh sounded like it should be; light, happy and a bit teasing.

“I cannot wait you to be inside of me” you confessed, and he did as you told. You could feel him in your entrance, dipping in just the tip. Your whole body was ready, and your mind was yelling you all kind of naughty words and Jake looked you just like he could hear them. He kissed you playfully and you just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Jake”, you moaned, “you are driving me crazy.”

“Now you know how I feel”, he said and took a good grip from your hair, pulling your head back and forced his lips on yours. You felt him entering inside of you and you moaned so hard, that it was a more of a shout than a moan. The thrusts went harder as he listened you carefully first, and all you could do was to say “yes”.

The sex wasn’t like you had imagined, but it was better. It wasn’t gentle and loving, it was rough and needy, and you felt both of you were pouring out all of those long-suppressed feelings and dreams of you two, the desperation with the dangers and the times you two tried to forget each other’s as it was just mad to fell in love with stranger. But here you two were, having sex in your kitchen, against all the odds.

You grabbed the cupboards above you trying to hold your position as Jake pounded in you and you kept drifting in the back of the counter top. Jake suddenly pulled you down from the surface, turned and bent you over, and entered you again, going in deeper with every thrust. You could hear his breathing tightening up and getting faster, as well yours. He grabbed your hair again, which you didn’t know that you liked before, but oh boy, how it made things better. You felt the orgasm coming again and you couldn’t help but scream and arch your back with incoming wave of pleasure. You didn’t hear yourself, but you were screaming Jake’s name, and that was the final straw for him, as he came inside of you.

****

You sat on Jake's lap and laid your head to his chest, as your fingers draw circles on his chest. He kissed you on your forehead and played with your hair.

“Jake?” you asked. “What happens now?”

He looked you in deep with his thoughts and you were wondering, would you even want to hear answer to your question.

“Well. This definitely complicates things”, he said finally.

“You can’t go offline now”, you teased him, trying to lighten the mood. “Can we solve this together?”

“So, we’re together now?” he asked with one of his eyebrows up and you bump your fist in his chest lightly. “That is not how to respond to a lady who has just had sex with you”.

“That is correct”, he frowned. “I’m sorry.”

“Do you have any objections at the topic of us being together?” you asked, and he could hear the worry in your voice.

“Well, I said it before. There’s no turning back now”, Jake gazed you intensely, caressing your cheekbones, “You’re stuck with me now.”

Knowing how hard it was to him say these things aloud, you took this as a victory and snuggled to get better position on his lap. He did love you as much you love him, and both of you know that.

“Just where I want to be. With you. No matter what.”

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