#like I don't even want you to do anything for me just let me sleep my sickness off please without getting yelled at that I'm sleeping too

[ranma0]

Notes from a concerned medical professional who reads too much hurt/comfort:

(These are all things I've seen in Hazbin/Helluva fanfics)

(Tw: for injury, illness, gore, drug use, overdose, a lot of other things)

You cannot drug someone to sleep by overdosing them on melatonin. It will not work

Don't submerge an open wound or stitches in a bathtub/pool/etc it will introduce bacteria to the wound (taking a shower is usually fine, just skip the romantic bath)

On that note, stitches do not immediately stop a wound from bleeding and should not be used to solve every problem (never give yourself stitches unless you have absolutely no other choice they can trap infection inside the body when done incorrectly)

And, if the wound is extremely deep, a person may need several layers of stitches to piece together the skin, muscle, and viscera

You absolutely cannot get high on tylenol or ibuprofen even if you mix it with alcohol.

If you do mix tylenol or ibuprofen with alcohol it can cause internal bleeding/kidney damage/liver failure, so please don't do that

If someone is shivering from a high fever, don't cover them in blankets it will raise their body temperature even more (please try correctly dosed tylenol or ibuprofen for this)

Don't submerge someone with a high fever in ice water, they might go into shock (they also might panic and hurt themselves) in a pinch lukewarm water will do

Don't put ice on burns, run them under lukewarm or cool water instead

If someone overdoses on an opoid (heroin, morphine, various pain medications), there is a medicine called nalaxone (Narcan) that can reverse the effects of opioids (edit: thank you to @queerlybehooved)

If someone is bleeding profusely, don't just hold their head and whisper sweet nothings, put pressure on the wound!!!

If a bullet remains in a person’s body after being shot it most likely should not be dug out unless it's blocking something vital, the bullet is not the problem the damage it made in it's path is

This isn't a criticism of authors who have written things like this. A lot of it isn't common knowledge, and DIY healthcare is absolutely steeped in myth and misinformation. I just worry about disinformation being perpetuated (and I really enjoy accurate hurt/comfort)

If I got anything wrong, please let me know, and I'll edit the post. I'm far from perfect and appreciate good advice

Let me know if you guys want a fic rec list of my favorite Hazbin Hotel whump fics

[coolprettyleo]

truth, dare, spin bottle - jack hughes

wc: 2.1k

tw: parties, slight angst, falling, drinking alc, cringe games, hs friends

jack hughes x oc

so highschool au

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

jack watched as marley sat at the corner of the rink fiddling with her camera. it had been two weeks since she started working with the usantdp boys and he was making no progress in the plan of how to get the girl.

he had only managed to awkwardly flirt with her while she stared at him clueless. he was pretty sure she didn't even realize he was flirting.

"you like taking pictures?" he asked the girl as she nodded.

"yeah, it's pretty cool" she mumbled

"you going to the party on friday?" he asked, trying to desperately hold a conversation with the girl.

the thing about marley, though, is that she's never been romantically involved with anyone, ever. so anytime a guy tried to flirt with the girl she would shut down.

"i don't like parties," she said

"have you ever even been to a party?" he asked teasingly as she blushed embarrassed

"i never have time. plus i have a football game that day-"

"it's going to be after, obviously,"

"sorry i rather sleep, to be honest," she said a bit dryly coming across as a bit bitchy but that only made jack want to pursue the girl ten times more,

"well think about it, i'll be there" he said with a charming smile before walking away.

leaving the girl to sit with her own thoughts. she had never been interested in attending any party that consisted of drunk teenagers, but something was screaming at her to go, and she wondered if it had anything to do with the blue-eyed hockey player.

___

marley and her friends sat around the lunch table on friday as brady talked about driving arrangements. usually, the girl would sit quietly and eat her lunch at times like these; her friends knew the girl wouldn't go, but she had considered going.

"where is it at?" she asked curiosuly as her whole table shut up.

"by lowes. why? do you want to go?" oliver said excitedly.

"oh my gosh. it's happening," as her best friends squealed.

"i have a shirt that will make your boobs look awesome"

"i'll bring you some seltzers"

"please let me curl your hair"

"you can come in our car"

her friends let out excitdly. they had been begging the girl to go to a party since they started, and she always shut down any ideas, so when planning to go out, they knew not to ask the girl. so today was a big day for the friend group. their baby was finally growing up in their eyes.

"GUYS!" she raised her voice at her overly excited friends

"i was just wondering," she said as she put a fry in her mouth as they all eyed her suspiciously.

"you never just wonder," oliver pressed.

"one of the hockey guys told me to go-" she said before being cut off by squeals and the guys letting out 'no ways' and snickers. all surprised in their goody tissues friend.

"that makes a lot more sense now," her friend jackie said.

"which one" mary nosily asked looking behind them at the table where the hockey players sat.

"don't make it obvious," she groaned at her friends, who all turned.

"we just need to make sure he's good for you marls" brady told the girl as they let out snickers.

"if I tell you guys, you can't say anything or even look their way," she said as they all put up pinkies.

"I think his name is jack," she said as the girls squealed and the guy's eyes went wide.

"dude your set for life if you get with him"

"he's cute!!"

"he's projected to go number one"

"you have to go tonight"

her friends all flooded her with thoughts she hadn't even thought about. he wasn't inviting her to get with her, right?

"It's not like that. he was just being nice." she calmed her friends down as they all looked at her like she had three heads.

"oh sweet innocent marls, you have so much to learn" marnie said wrapping her arms around marley as the friend group snickered and nodded at the girl.

___

marley walked out of the football game with no intentions of going to that party.

"marley!" she heard and turned to see brady jogging up to her with oliver and garrett in tow.

"we're meeting the girls at jackies to pregame, you're coming with us," garret said

"hell no. my leg hurts so bad, I landed from my toe touch awkwardly," she complained as they rolled their eyes.

"i don't care. you're going tonight." oliver smirked as he gave the guys the go. garret reached for her cheer bag before oliver threw the girl over his shoulder. brady with keys in hand.

"guys don't be annoying" she squealed

"if you don't have fun tonight, we'll never make you go to a party again," brady said as she groaned.

"at least make sure my ass isnt out" she said feeling inscure knowing there was people most likely watching them.

she felt oliver flip her skirt down and hold it as they walked to the car, not knowing the certain boys that were watching.

"are they a thing?" cole asked as jack watched like a kicked puppy

"i didn't think so," he said as trevor patted his back

"that would explain why she wasn't really flirting back with you," he said as jack slightly glared.

"let's just go," he said before driving away.

___

marley walked into the party a bit tipsy. she was already two drinks in with a seltzer in hand as she looked around. it was a shock for the girl to see people she thought she knew making out, hitting vapes, and feeling up on each other at every corner.

she followed her friends deeper into the party as her eyes roamed the party, hoping to find the hockey player who had told her to go. she soon found him surrounded by his friends with a beer in hand, looking as handsome as ever.

instead of going up to him and making her presence known like she thought she would, she hid behind oliver.

"what are you doing?" he laughed at the girl as he followed her line of sight; he truly did see her as a younger sister, and the fact she was so nervous about a boy was so funny to him.

"I'm feeling insecure about being here," she told the boy as he frowned.

"you shouldn't, you're one of the hottest girls in school it's no surprise he has a thing for you," he said as she looked at him odd

"how do you know he has a thing for me?" she pressed as oliver threw his head back and laughed.

"I'm a guy, marls," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. she rolled her eyes and took another sip as she went to dance with the girls.

meanwhile, jack was watching the two with a glare,

"do you want me to ask garret if there a thing?" alex asked as he followed his gaze to marley. he was friends with the lacrosse player and he knew he would tell him if he asked.

"i don't think they are" cole said before jack could even respond.

"it's fine guys-"

he was cut off when the guy in question came to dab alex up, going around the group to be polite.

"hey, question, which of the girls in your group is single," he said as he looked at the dancing girls.

"aside from marnie, all of them. except I know jackies seeing one of the football players"

"oh," alex said as jack allowed himself to relax again

"why do you ask?" he said

"thought they were cute," alex tried to to play it off. jack could have sworn he saw garret look at him.

"we're getting bored; we were planning to play spin the bottle upstairs in a bit; you should bring the girls," alex said nonchalantly.

"I'll let them know," garret said before walking off.

___

the upstairs bedroom reeked with beer as marley stood in the corner. when garret asked if they'd be down to play games with the hockey players, her friends were quick to jump at the opportunity.

"whoever the bottle lands on, you have to choose between truth or dare," trevor said, putting the bottle in the middle and spinning it, for it to land on mary.

"truth," she said

"who was your first kiss" trevor smirked.

"austin logan" she said. marley blushed because if she got that question, she would have to voice the fact she's never kissed anyone.

mary spinned the bottle for it to land on the one and only, jack hughes. the girl looked at marley and smirked. as jack mumbled 'truth'.

"whose the hottest girl in this room," she asked the boy who only smirked while looking at marley

"marley love" he said without skipping a beat holding eye contact with the girl as the boys clapped him on the back and let out 'whoops'. the girl blushed crimson red not knowing how to react.

"i'm gonna go refill my drink," she mumbled to her friends before basically speeding out of the room.

leaving everyone to stare at each other. jack felt horrible after seeing the embarrassed look on her face, so when marnie stood up to chase after her, he told her he had it and went after the girl.

"marley!" he said over the music as the girl turned around.

"oh hi jack" she said a bit chirpy

"I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. I do really think you're the hottest girl," he explained as she kept a straight face

"thanks, you are too- well not the hottest girl; but like your cute too not that you arent hot, because you are. but I'm not calling you a girl or anything" she finished with a gulp as he smiled down at the girl. she was tipsy and he could clearly see that.

"yeah?" he said hoping she'd keep rambling. he loved her voice and could listen to it for hours.

"mmhm," she said, looking at his lips, an act that didn't get noticed by jack.

"you wanna go back? or we could go somewhere quieter-" he said hoping this was his moment to make progress.

"actually, if you're not drinking, you think you could take me home?" she asked, feeling like going home.

"completely sober, yeah," he said, flashing the girl his keys as she smiled and went to bid her friends goodbye.

___

the two entered jack's car with an uncomfortable silence.

"so how was your first party," he asked the girl as he drove.

"everything I thought it would be, to be honest," she said as he smiled.

"i'm glad you had fun-"

"oh my gosh! can we stop for tacos!" she said as he drove by a whole bunch of taco trucks.

"you have a curfew?" he asked a bit skeptically, knowing the girl wouldn't normally be out this late.

"no, my grandmas asleep. I should be fine," she said as jack pulled over and wondered why she lived with her grandma. he just wanted to know her.

"don't open the door," he said as he saw her reach for the door

"what?" she giggled at the boy as he ran around the car and opened the door for her.

"I'm being a gentleman," he said smugly.

"someone has a crush," she sang as he rolled his eyes.

"as if i haven't made that obvious" he sassily told the girl as she laughed

"well, i never knew! you're not as good a flirter as you think you are" she told him as he gasped

"I mean, you're here," he quipped back as she let out another laugh. Jack felt a rush of adrenaline, knowing he had caused that.

"I- you have a point," she said, accepting her defeat.

the girl ordered, and as she reached to pull out her card, jack was already handing the cashier his card.

"jack-"

"it's on me" he said as he smiled.

"i feel bad, i made you drive me and now you're buying me food-"

"you can repay me with a date," he told the girl as her eyebrows raised.

"you're serious," she said, looking for any form of jokiness, and all she saw was a hopeful look.

"why you barely even know me"

"I want to know you," he said, and the girl could squeal. He knew all the perfect things to say, and she was finally getting why all these girls would jump headfirst into a guy.

she smiled at the boy before outstretching her hand,

"deal"

[likegoldintheair]

and because i'm greedy, i'm sending you another one (feel free to only do them both if they spark joy though <3) but how about 40 + buddie? 💛

"You know you can always stay, right."

Eddie doesn't phrase it like a question, knows that Buck knows that he's not a guest in this house, that he's never really been one at all. That he has his own set of bedding neatly folded and stacked on a shelf in Eddie's linen closet, along with an old LAFD t-shirt that has definitely seen better days but works perfectly to sleep in. That there's even a toothbrush permanently taking up space next to Eddie's on the bathroom sink.

"I know," Buck sighs, shrugging on his jacket, looking longingly at the couch where they'd been sat just moments ago, and then back at Eddie. The longing look is still there, turning slightly apologetic, as he says, "but I got-"

"You got important uncle duties in the morning." Eddie fills in, voice gentle as he continues, "I know."

"Nsxt time?"

"Next time."

"Next time." Buck echoes, looking like he's going to say something else, but then he nods, says, "I should, uh, I should probably get going."

"Buck?"

Buck doesn't say anything, just tilts his head a little, face open and hopeful as he waits for Eddie to continue, and Eddie kind of just- breaks a little bit in the best possible way. He takes a deep breath, and then he's closing the small distance between himself and Buck, hands reaching up to gently, carefully cradle Buck's face. Then, before he can think twice about it, he's pulling Buck down (and isn't that thrilling in and of itself, that he has to pull him down towards him) into a kiss.

It's an impulsive thing, absolutely. But it's also been months, if not years, of Eddie embarrassingly often daydreaming about what it would feel like.

What Buck would taste like.

None of those daydreams, or anything Eddie could have ever imagined, compare to the real thing, though. Kissing Buck, and having Buck enthusiastically kiss him back, is - it's everything.

It's the whole world both expanding beyond the furtest corners of the universe and zeroing in on every point of contact where Buck and Eddie are touching, all at the same time. It's like every kiss, every touch, ignites a tiny spark that shoots throughout Eddie's body, setting him alight from within. He's burning up and yet he craves more, suddenly wondering how he could have lived his whole life up until this point without Buck's hands on his hips, his tongue in his mouth, his soft curls between his fingers.

When they break away, they're both panting, chests heaving from it and when Buck lets a small laugh escape his mouth, Eddie can't help but join in.

"This was a nice surprise." Buck says eventually, laughter still lacing his voice, eyes bright and cheeks flushed. "I-I, uh, I kind of wanted that to happen for a really long time, actually."

"Me, too," Eddie breathes, feeling like he might actually burst open from the sheer amount of happiness coursing through him. "I just... I couldn't- didn't want you to leave again without having done that."

"I'm glad you didn't"

"Me, too." Eddie says softly, thumb brushing against Buck's lower lip. He wants to kiss him again, wants to crawl inside Buck completely, and hide away in the space where their bodies touch. "Hey, Buck."

"Yeah?"

"You don't have to stay on the couch ever again, if you don't want to." Eddie drags his gaze from Buck's lips, his heart stuttering slightly when their eyes meet. "In fact, we should throw the whole thing away."

Buck laughs at that, a bright, carefree thing, and Eddie swears he's never looked more beautiful. Happiness suits him. He can't help but pull Buck down again, pressing their mouths together, neither of them able to contain their smiles. Eddie doesn't mind at all. Kissing Buck, teeth and all, is still the best thing he's ever done.

[mildlyromanticperv]

What did you expect of me?

Karina x MReader. Fluff. Enemies to lovers.

-For christ sake, what a bitch! -Your anger boiling in your heart and your brain tells you, no, yells you to go to your managers office and demand a fair treatment, it's just ourageous that among all the workers in the office you have to stay late every single day of the week to cover the "last project of the quarter".

No matter what you do, how hard you work, how many late nights and how many cups of coffee you drink at a day, it just feels like a prison in here, the office that hired you as the main developer for the website on their new brand "Supernova."

Plus, who names a project "Supernova"? Sounds like with just a simple code here and there you'd make the market implode and then explode in money... If your manager Karina expects for that to happen she's either naively hopeful or a total delusional.

-You, come to my office. -Her cold words stabs your brain, after a whole week hearing her low pitch condescending dictatorial voice you can't bear to listen to it one more time, but you need this job like, DESPERATELY need this job, so there's no talk back to the boss.

-Yes boss?

-We're behind on the project, have you been slacking off again? -Her cold judgemental gaze falls upon your black sacked eyes showing off the immense exhaustion you have tu put up with during the project.

-Look boss, I'm doing my best, I haven't slept well these past few days but I assure you I will have everything ready by next month even if the useless of my coworkers don't do shit. -Your tongye got the best of you and runs wild. -I just need to have a good night sleep, can you let me out early today?

-No, we are all hands on deck and you know that. -She sighs and rubs her forehead in a clear show of stress and disappointment. -Just go back to work and don't screw anything up.

Any person with enough patience would put up with that shit, but not you, not now at least. The condescending tone and the past sleep deprived week has been just too much for you, clearly you're not thinking straight anymore, or perhaps you're thinking clearer...?

-Fuck this.

-Excuse me? -She responds with equal or perhaps even higher anger.

-Fuck this Karina, I'm not doing any more shit today and I'm tired to put up with your fucking demands. Fire me if you want I'm going home to sleep. -You really shuld've thought that better, but what is done is done, you start to pick up your stuff and bracing yourself for the shouting match.

-You cross that door and you're suspended, one week half pay. -Surprisingly enough instead of picking up a fight and shouting her vocal cords off as she usually does, she just stares straight into your eyes with a gaze so cold it could freeze hell itself. -You're not the only developer in our payroll, if I wanted I could fire your sorry ass right now and make it so you never work as a developer never again in your life, so consider this a favour.

Breathe.

Don't let that tone of hers get into your core.

Just, breathe.

-Fuck you. -It's the only thing you get to say before actually leaving.

-One week suspension no pay, and don't you dare call me or text me asking to forgive you. Jackass.

With the anger oozing through your pores you just slam the door and head out. You start your car and praying you don't crash you go from 0 to 100 in just a couple of seconds screeching the tires of your car.

-Please god, take care of him... -She sighs under her breath.

But wait... What?

Take care of him?

During that next week there was absolutely no news from you on the office, things started to be more... tense. You've received a ton of messages from your coworkers basically begging him to come back, but the answer is defenitive: No.

However things don't ever go your way.

*Bzz* *Bzz* *Bzz*

-Hey, we need to talk, come to the office. -Again, that swee... No. Annyoing voice again.

-I'm suspended. -Your answer comes as soon as the thought hits your brain.

A sigh from the other line and a faint whisper.

-This man is going to be the death of me some day. -But then the usual tone returns. -Look, I made a rash decision and we need your intel, you're the one that knows the way around our software.

-I thought you had several developers in your payroll, I bet they can help. -You say sipping through the wine you bought for that dinner for one you've been pushing away so much due to the job.

-I'm asking nicely, and around here you know that's as rare as an unicorn. Just come here tomorrow and finish the project, we're ahead.

-Ahead? What do you mean ahead? You said we we're behind last week! -Your voice comes harsher and harsher, even though your chest is telling you not to.

Not to her.

-I lied to try and make things faster, okay? Just come and we can talk like professionals. -She couldn't come to acknowledge the fact that she just wanted to see you. She couldn't admit that she misses your cologne, your three day beard and your stoic gaze when you're so deep in thought. -I'll send you the advances that have been made.

Right away she hangs up the phone, relieved she didn't break down into yelling or insults. Right away an email arrives on your computer with such incredibly... small advances looks like you carried the entire project all by yourself.

-Why am I not surprised? -You sigh under your breath as you pause the movie you were watching and read what has been done, immediately you start chaning... well, almost everything.

Next day...

You should at least turn off the car, for real, have you seen how expensive the gas is around these days?

"Just go, I avoid her any longer... I- I don't want to..." -It's the only thought that crosses your mind, the thought of seeing her piercing eyes again, the feeling of her gaze piercing and burning through your very soul, the loud beating of your heart as you look at her lips...

Her lips...

If only she wasn't your boss, right?

-So, I checked the non existent advances the useless guys did, and...

-How you've been? Have you slept well? -For some reason her tone wasn't condescending anymore, the worry present on her voice...

Could it be?

-Yes, finally in months I've been sleeping great... -Her eyes, oh. my. god... Her eyes... -Anyways, I have everything finished now, you can present it to corporate. -You say trying to avoid her eyes as you speak sarcastically and look at your watch.

-Big date coming or something? -She asks, doing an awesome job yo hide the jealousy.

-Just wondering how long this will take. -She sighs again, feeling the anger and stress of your cold demeanor.

-Your week of suspension ends today and the weekind is off by legal, so you can go now and I'll see you on monday.

-Sure.

After that you just go back to your usual routine, the weekend goes great and the next week of work comes, with so much less stress that even the busiest day feels like a walk through the park. The time off work led you to watch so much shows, and so much free time, time spent in imagining your life outside of work with that person that would make your days so much happier.

Thinking of love.

What a great future you could have, perhaps you could get married and have kids, after all that's your dream.

In a year you'd ascendo in your job, start earning more, you'd start dating to finally get the chance to let you feel that love you so desperately look for, In a year your boss wouldn't be your boss and perhaps you could date her, in a year you'd buy your first...

Your boss? Date... your boss?

Why would you think that? She's a bitch.

"But she's a gorgeous bitch." You thought, perhaps... only perhaps... You wanted that, you liked your boss...

*Bzz* *Bzz* *Bzz*

Your phone rings with a text from your boss.

-Corporate loved the project, we were given monday to celebrate, so I'll be expecting you monday 7:00 A.M. sharp for the party.

-Got it boss. And hey, sorry for snapping out last week. -Perhaps this could be a beginning, you know you should keep things professional, you keep telling yourself to stop but flesh is weak.

-Yeah, just don't be late. -Her response cold as always after 5 minutes of writing and deleting, she's also in the midst of an inner debate, whether let herself feel what she wants to feel for you or just don't say anything.

But why? Why shouldn't you try? Because she's your boss? There's plenty of people that date with their boss and make it work, you shouldn't keep ahold of the prospect of your happiness just because people might judge, that's the whole point, living for yourself and be happy yourself. Isn't it?

That very Monday at 7:00 A.M. you show yourself at work wearing a new white T-shirt and some loose jeans, your usual wrist watch and a new cologne you bought just for your boss, nothing else is going to stop you.

-Hey, boss. -You came to talk to her made a nrevous wreck not really knowing what to do to get her attention.

-Oh, here he is, the brain behind it all. -She wrapped her arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to present you to some corporate officers like if you were a prize, like you never shouted before... Like you two were friends... Being so close to her made your every sense enter overdrive and your nostrils welcomed her particular scent, that magnificent smell of lavender and strawberries sent your head over the moon.

The rest of the party went completely normal, talking here, showing off there... Taking glances at your boss every once in a while as well.

Wait, did she looked at you as well?

Was she blushing?

-Hey boss can I talk to you for a sec? -You got closer and whispered into her ear, not long after she pointed you to the balcony where you usually go to have your lunch.

-Make it quick.

-Look boss, there's no easy way for me to say this, but I think I should quit... I... I have feelings for you.

-Is that so? -Her cold demeanor makes you back off for a second, unable to tell the truth in her eyes you stutter.

-I know, I know that I was rude last week and I'm being just way too out of line. -Her eyes shine with a glint never seen before, in her mind the thoughts are divided whether she should speak from her heart, as Karina. Or speak from her brain as Ms. Jimin, regional Manager of your branch.

-You know you're my worker, and this is incredibly inappropriate.

-Don't you feel the same for me? I saw you looking for my eyes before.

-Don't be ridiculous, I'm your boss. -Despite the way she feels work ethics comes first, how can a manager could let a worker speak to her that way?

-I don't care. -It's the last thing you said before leaning forward and placing your hand against her cheek, caressing her soft skin and pressing your lips over hers.

For a second all that exists is you and her, together in a tight embrace holding her waist desperately thinking that if you'd ever let go of her she'd just vanish in the thin air. She responds to your advances letting your body invade her personal space, for mere seconds that feel like an eternity all that she can feel is your hands gripping her blouse until she lets go of any ties and wrap her arms around your neck, tipping into her toe-tips to match as much as she can your height.

-We... We can't... I'm your boss... -Her voice comes out cracking, breathing unsteady due to the raw passion she just felt a while ago. -It's inappropriate.

-I don't care, I'll quit if needed, I just care that I want you.

-I want you too. -She rests her head on your shoulder nuzzling her face in the crook of your neck.

You then caress her soft hair, taking a deep breath of her unique scent that send jolts of electricity along your brain.

-So what now, boss? -This time the words come out strong, lovingly, softly.

-Now we talk to HR, couples need to fill paperwork. -She pulls back and looks into your eyes again. -You always make me do more and more paperwork... -She then whispers in your ear. -Sweetie.

[olvxva]

emptiness pt. III / joost klein x reader

part I / part II

warnings: a little bit of cursing, smoking, i guess no more angst ;)

summary: pink lighter brings people back together

// 900 words

when you came home that night all you wanted to do was bury yourself under the blanket and go to sleep. you needed to forget everything that happened. it wasn’t reasonable really. kissing your ex that made you feel like shit? not a good idea.

you woke up the next day and wanted to check your phone. of course it was dead and you forgot to charge it after the party. you quickly plugged it in and a new notification popped up.

‚1 missed call from joost’

you didn’t think he would try to reach you. he didn’t follow you when you rushed out of the apartment last night, so you thought it was pretty obvious that he gave up. maybe he didn’t after all?

you weren’t gonna call him back. why would you? this whole situation was already pretty fucked up. you felt lost.

you got out of bed and went straight to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready to look presentable. after that all you needed was a strong coffee. it always made you feel better. on your way to the kitchen you suddenly heard a knock on the door.

‚it’s 10 am, people. what do you want from me this early?’ you muttered.

without looking through the peephole, you opened the door and regretted it right away.

he was standing in front of you, as if you had attracted him with your thoughts. he held a bouquet of your beloved peonies in his hands. he looked tired, as if he still hadn't managed to get rid of the thoughts of yesterday.

you looked at him with raised eyebrows without saying anything. you both just looked at each other for couple of minutes. joost decided to finally break this strange silence.

‚may i come in? please.’

you stepped aside, letting him into your apartment.

‚these are for you, of course.’ he smiled softly.

you took the flowers from him with the intention of putting them in a vase.

‚thank you, that’s very nice.’

joost followed you into the kitchen. after a while, you turned towards the man who was standing in the corner of the room, watching you.

‚listen, i want to say sorry for the last night.’ you started ‚i shouldn’t have kissed you.’

joost looked at you with slight resentment in his eyes.

‚do you regret it, y/n?’

his question flustered you. of course you didn’t. how could you regret something like that. you loved him, even after all of this.

he still waited for your answer.

‚you know i didn’t.’

‚then don’t apologize for it.’ as he said these words, he slowly moved closer to you.

you were now between his body and the kitchen counter. you couldn't run away anymore, like you always did when it was getting tough.

‚i love you, y/n. i'll say it a million times if i have to, you know?’

you looked into each other's eyes. it seemed to you that at that moment joost was able to read your every thought.

‚please, give me one more chance. i promise you, i won’t fuck it up this time.’

you felt he was being sincere in that moment, but there were a million thoughts in your head.

what if he hurts you again?

what if it’s just lies?

you ran your hand across his cheek, wiping away the tear that had fallen from his eye.

‚i care about you too much. i don't think i would forgive myself if i didn't give you one more chance.’ you looked at him and smiled slightly.

maybe you were naive, who knows. but you knew one thing. you knew this blonde man was too valuable to be written off because of his idiotic mistake.

joost didn't say anything, he just connected your lips and kissed you with such force that you almost couldn't feel your face.

after a while, you broke away from him and asked with a slight smile.

‚you wanna smoke with me?’

he laughed briefly. you loved that laugh.

‚you don’t have to ask me twice, honey.’

you took his hand and led him to the living room with a large window. you opened it and sat with him on the windowsill. joost took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and handed one to you. you placed your head on his shoulder and he hugged you lightly.

‚fuck, i don’t have a lighter anywhere in the apartment’ you turned your head towards him.

‚i lost the one you gave me yesterday on my way home…’

joost put his hand in his pocket and after a second he waved a pink lighter in front of your eyes - the exact same one you gave him the day you met. a huge smile appeared on your face.

‚no way, you still have it!’ you punched his shoulder mockingly.

‚i will always have it.’ he looked down at you and kissed the top of your head.

he lit your cigarette and immediately did the same with his own. you sat there, looking at people passing by on the street.

you felt good. you wanted this moment to last forever because that's what made you feel safe.

finally everything was starting to fall into place. you realized that he made you feel at home. he was your home.

you could spend your whole life like this - smoking cheap cigarettes with the love of your life by your side. and this stupid pink lighter, of course. emptiness didn't exist when he was around.

[artists-ally]

Hi! So I was the anon that asked about size difference and I’m happy that you like it :) my request would be Harvey with a reader that’s on the shorter or petite side. Harvey cannot contain the thoughts running through his mind when his clothes easily drown you or how both your hands can be covered by his. I can just imagine him fucking the reader deep and groaning when he sees her tummy bulge 🙈

{My Hands, Your Lips} Reader x Harvey Specter

I'm gonna pretend I'm not as turned on by the thought of Harvey pushing my knees up to my ears and making fun of how much smaller I am than he is. Toootalllyyy not gonna do that... ahaha- Anywaaayyy enjoy!!! Title inspired by this song.

Word Count: 6,366

Warnings: Petite/Small reader, Smut; size kink, dom!Harvey, spitting, choking, degrading, spanking, bondage, mild breeding kink.

Tagging: @rosedpetal @blacktreacle22 @bbyanarchist

~~~~~

“Harvey, don't you think I should wear heels with the dress? If I don’t then I barely come up to your chest.”

“No,” he shakes his head. “No heels.”

“Why are you so adamant that I shouldn’t wear heels tonight?” I didn’t mind taking opinions from him every once in a while, but he rarely tells me not to wear something. 

“You don’t need to make yourself taller, Yn,” he whispered, placing his hands on my shoulders. “You’re too fucking pretty for anyones good, and I don’t need the people at this party thinking they have a chance.”

There has been something off about him for the last few days anyway. He’s been more pent up than usual. A lot more… touchy. Specifically picking me up and putting me wherever he wants. Setting me on the counter while he’s cooking, picking me up and throwing me on the bed before we go to sleep. Nothing overly sexual, but it’s clear there’s been something else going on.

“What’s been up with you lately?” I ask straight up. 

“Nothing, I just don’t want you to wear heels.”

“Why don’t you want me to wear heels?”

“Because, I asked you not to.”

I tilted my head to the side. Let's see if this theory is correct. “Is it because you want me to be smaller than you?”

“Yn, don’t.”

Ding ding ding!

A smirk brightens onto my face. I’ve suspected for a while now that Harvey has a thing for how much smaller I am than him. It’s clear he’s been trying to tell me– or rather cryptically showing me by physically demonstrating so.

The grin only gets wider.

“I asked you nicely once. Don’t.”

I rolled my eyes, “Fine, you win. Be mysterious and oddly demanding about what I wear.”

Before I could even reach for the pair of heels I was planning to wear, Harvey had gripped my arm, spun me around, and his hand was around my throat.

“You know no matter what you wear, you look stunning. And if you must know, I think everyone’s focus is going to be on you anyway tonight. And I don’t need everyone staring at what’s mine.”

Oh. OH. Oh my. 

I genuinely didn’t have a response other than a shiver rolling through my body. I knew he felt it because his grip tightened, both on my hip and around my neck.

“You know you can wear whatever you want, but just know, I’m willing to deal with the consequences of anyone who looks for too long.”

“Harvey, that’s a little extreme,” I chuckle, trying to make light of a clearly serious topic for him. “What about this particular event has got you so stressed out about everyone looking at me?”

“It’s our first formal, corporate event together,” Harvey explains. “No one has ever seen you all dressed up. And I’m not sure I want them to because… fuck, Yn you looks so good tonight.” The compliment makes my heart mushy. “Harvey, you know I’d never-”

“It’s not about that. Of course I know you won’t let anything happen. It’s everyone else’s grubby little hands I’m worried about. It’s a dog eat dog mentality in the world of law. Everyone at the event is not afraid to take what they want, go after it with everything they’ve got.”

“So it’s going to be a room full of men like you? And Jessica, of course. I’m excited to meet more women like Jessica. Oh! Will–”

Harvey cuts off my question with a deep laugh. He spins me around and places his hands on my hips while he looks down at me. “I literally just told you that every man here will want to have a piece of you, and you’re more worried about meeting more women like Jessica?”

“Yup,” I nod, pressing up on my toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Because I know you will keep me safe.”

I watched his eyes change. The smile faded and I felt his grip tighten. Again. “Fuck Yn you always know just what to say.”

I let my arms fall around his shoulders, our fronts cradled close. “And I say lets get the fuck out of here and go party.”

~~~~~~

Ray stops the car at the base of the staircase that led up to this gorgeous venue. We were in Washington D.C. for this conference. Lawyers and other legal personnel from all over the country were invited to network and do whatever other corporate bullshit they desire. There were guest speakers, of which Jessica was invited to give a talk on her journey of being a first in class Harvard graduate.

Bad. Ass. 

There had been a convention with a ton of vendors, a cooking class, and a shitload of corporate jargon. Being in a room, albeit a very big room, with hundreds of lawyers was starting to eat away at my brain cells. I’m glad it’s the last event of the week. 

The gala. 

The streets were lined with luxurious cars and limos, guests exiting and ascending the staircase in their finest glam. Everyone looks exquisite and propper. Who doesn’t love to play dress-up every now and then?

Per Harvey’s request, I did not wear heels. I settled for a pair of black sandals with a pearled band around the ankle. They did have a small heel. Frankly everything I wore that wasn’t flip-flops had a bit of a heel to it. But they weren’t the stiletto pumps I was going to dawn instead. 

I had bought those shoes to specifically go with this dress too. And this dress… It had one inch straps that formed a square neckline. The bodice had corset paneling that was lined with sheer lace. The skirt hugged my hips and then the slit opened it up. Gorgeous. And I had a coupon. Win win. 

With my hand wrapped around Harvey’s arm, we walked in together, greeting people left and right. I was finally beginning to understand just how powerful Harvey actually is in the world of law. Everyone knows he is. Sean Evans, a guest speaker from Seattle, even knew who he was. We were watching his speech on how to give a thorough deposition, and he called Harvey out by name from the crowd.

Wild shit going on here. I was just content being arm candy all night. 

“Ahh, there he is,” Jessica calls out from the cocktail bar. “Harvey, Yn, this is Michael Bunting, one of my old professors from Harvard.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Mr. Specter. I’ve heard many things about you, glad to finally be able to meet in person,” Michael smiled pleasantly, shaking Harvey’s hand firmly. “And you must be Mrs. Specter.”

“Oh, no no I’m-”

“Not yet,” Harvey cuts in. I give him a raised eyebrow and he just winks at me. 

Well… guess we’re gonna talk about that later. 

“Let me buy you each a drink,” Michael offers. 

“No drinks for us tonight, but thank you anyway. It’s kind to offer.”

Okay, clearly Harvey has some sort of ulterior motive for later tonight because when has he ever turned down a free drink? I sort of pay attention to whatever Harvard/lawyer lingo their yapping about, but it doesn’t strike any of my interests. I see Rachel and Mike across the room so I pat Harvey on the shoulder and ditch him for her.

Before I can get a few steps, he tugs me right into his chest. “Where do you think you’re going?”

My knees go a little weak. “Just to chat with Rachel.”

“I’ll walk you over.”

“That’s a little much, Harvey.” I ‘adjust’ his tie to give my hands something to do. “Besides, you’re chatting with that professor. I have no fucking clue what you all are talking about, and I need Rachel’s opinion on a new curling iron I was gonna buy.”

“Trust me, the last thing I want to be doing is chatting with Michael Bunting. That guy doesn’t know his left shoe from his right shoe.”

Curious, I look down at his feet. I’ll be damned. His left shoe is on his right foot. Seriously. 

“Huh, a bit ironic isn’t it? An established Harvard law professor doesn’t know which shoe belongs on what foot.”

“See where I’m getting with this? Wherever you go, I go.”

With a playful smile, I ask, “What happens when I need to go to the bathroom?”

He bends his head down and whispers in my ear. “Trust me, you don’t want me to come in there with you, sweetheart.” It doesn’t take long before a pulse settles between my thighs. Harvey just chuckles, kissing the space behind my ear. “I bet you’d like me to follow you, huh? Lock the door. Bend you over the sink. One hand in your hair, pulling it back so you have to watch in the mirror. The other covering your mouth because you don’t know how to be quiet.”

Suddenly, my curling iron questions seem inferior to what is happening. 

I knew he was pent up, but this is… this is different. 

“So yes, I will be escorting you anywhere you wanna go tonight. Understand?”

All I could manage was a nod. Harvey has always been dominant, but this is uncharted territory for our relationship. And I’m kind of fucking loving it.

He pulls away from my space and grabs my hand, dragging me behind him. Curse him and those long legs. I have to skip a step and then another one so I can stay behind him. With his shoulders blocking the way, I can’t see where we’re going. To the bathroom? A coat closet? Maybe to-

“Rachel, Mike,” he greets. I have to fight to keep the frown at bay. 

“Yn!” Rachel says elatedly. “God, you look stunning. Where did you get that dress? And those sandals are adorable!”

“Have fun,” Harvey spoke softly, kissing the back of my hand before leaving me with Rachel. 

I tell her all about the dress and the sandals, and about Harvey not wanting me to wear heels. And the… context to it as well. She had a knowing smirk on her face. Mike left us to our devices after he heard her say ‘I think you’re going to need to take a sick day after what Harvey is going to do to you’.

Oh how I wish she’s right. 

“I mean, is it that bad?”

“Is what that bad?” She quirks her head to the side, sipping whatever pink, goddess looking cocktail she has. It literally has glitter in it.

“The height difference.”

Her eyes scan me up and down, “Well, it’s certainly more apparent without the heels, that’s for sure. But I mean it’s cute. He’s like a head and a half taller than you.”

“It’s like standing next to a giraffe. I know Harvey isn’t that tall, I think I’m just that short, you know? It’s annoying. I have to look so far up at him. And I had the cutests shoes I was gonna wear with this dress. ‘Till mister ‘I can reach the top shelf everywhere’ told me not to.”

Rachel snorted, a drop or two or seven of her cocktail spewing out from her lips. “Yn, you look hot no matter what you wear. And if Donna was here to scold you, she’d say something along the lines of ‘there isn’t anything a bit of pouty lips and fuck me eyes can’t do’. So, since Donna isn’t here, go give Harvey some pouty lips and fuck me eyes.”

I just smile. I love Rachel so much. “I would go find him, but he might pull me into a backroom and literally beat my ass. He walked me over here just so he wouldn’t lose sight of me.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

Both of us laugh at the ridiculousness of it, but it is kinda true. I could easily disappear and no one would notice. Literally. I might be the smallest one here and it would be easy to stick to the wall and–

“Excuse me, ladies, but might one of you point me in the direction of the nearest balcony?”

I looked over my shoulder to a man who had a charming smile. His hair was combed back and he had on a tux. As if it would help, I stood on my toes and tried to look for one, but legit couldn’t see a thing. 

Rachel had a nasty look on her face. I looked between the two of them, waiting for… something to happen.

“Zane.”

“It’s Ross, actually. But I’m sure you already knew that, Tanner.”

“Uhh–” they clearly know each other.

“Who’s your friend?” This Tanner guy asks. He looks at me and takes a sip of his drink. 

“You don’t need to know, beat it.”

Oh, so this is obviously an ex or something. He looks a little older, but who am I to judge?

“I’m Travis Tanner,” he extends a hand. “An old friend of the frim.”

“Take your sleazy hands somewhere else, Tanner,” Rachel takes a step towards him, standing shoulder to shoulder with me.

“Relax, Ross,” he says. “I’m just trying to talk to her. I didn’t ask for her hand in holy matrimony. Go find that little associate of yours so I can buy her a drink.”

I felt a presence behind me, then an arm slip around my waist. The cologne I picked out earlier this morning wafted around me and I let myself lean into Harvey. 

“Say one more thing to her and I’ll put you on the floor, Tanner.”

I have never heard Harvey sound so threatening. 

I watched his brown eyes go from me, and then distinctly up to Harvey. “Of course.”

That grip around my hip tightened and I laid my palm over his hand to get him to relax. It did nothing. “Rachel, would you mind going to find Mike for me? I need to ask him a few questions on what the expected sentence time is for a man who is about to make another unrecognizable to his face ID.”

“Gladly,” she says, marching off to my left. 

“Darling, you’re seriously with a man who is verbally threatening to beat the shit out of another?”

“I’m about to get a whistle and referee the match because I think Harvey would like to go a few rounds with you,” I state my view on the matter. 

Travis grins at me. “I see why you like her. She’s feisty, can pack a punch in that small frame of hers.”

I can feel Harvey take a deep, steadying breath. “My love?”

“Hmm?” I look up at him.

“Get behind me.”

“Harvey–” He gently unwinds his arm around my waist and steps in front of me. The taught muscles in his shoulders pop out through his shirt. He ditched his jacket somewhere along the way.

I look over to my left just as Rachel finds Mike. She whispers something to him and I watch as his whole face changes. He whips his head around and we lock eyes. With his drink forgotten on the small bar-top table, he heads for our direction.

“Make a comment about my girl again, and I swear to God I will knock your teeth out.”

“Relax, Harvey. Why don’t you ask her what she would like to do. You seem to be awfully keen on making decisions for her,” Travis suggests. What a cocky son of a bitch. Does he actually think I’d give up Harvey for him? What a fucking joke. 

“I think you’re right,” Harvey agrees. He steps to the side just as Mike gets there. “What do you think, sweetheart? Would you like to sucker punch him or shall I?”

I can’t help the evil look that crosses my face. Instead of answering him, I simply grab a hold of his tie and yank his lips down to mine. He answers with a vicious bite, groaning into my mouth. His palm finds my neck, not being shy about the show. 

When I pull away, I’m left breathless and more than a little turned on. I know my lipstick is smudged to hell because I can see it on Harvey’s mouth. With a wicked smirk, I turn to Travis, who is red all over. “I think I’d just rather show him all he’ll never be able to touch.”

Harvey, again, plants himself behind me, but keeps his hand wrapped around my throat. “You heard her, Tanner. If I were you, I’d probably try, too. She is one of a kind. But she’s mine. She lives in my home. Eats the meals I cook for her. Wears my shirt after I’ve fucked her until she’s whimpering my name. She’ll have my ring on her finger one day. Have my last name. ‘Yn Specter’ sounds a whole lot better than ‘Yn Tanner’, don’t you think? So, while you still have your dignity–no matter how many times I have to take it from you in court–I suggest you get the fuck out of here. Now. And if I ever hear of you talking about her, I’ll break more than your teeth.”

Everyone had a look of shock across their face. Including me. 

Without a parting word, Tanner left. I felt Harvey let out a breath as he dropped his hand from my throat. 

I breathed a sigh of relief. Mostly for the fact that I didn’t have to call the police to report a homicide and then run off into the sunset to escape for being a possible accomplice. 

“Well,” Mike scratches the back of his head, clearing his throat. “That was certainly… something.”

“What the hell is going on over here?” Jessica steps into our circle. “And why the hell did I just see Travis Tanner practically sprinting towards the exit?”

“He tried to put the hots on Yn,” Rachel has the most sinister look on her face. I give her a look that screams ‘really?’. She just mouths ‘good dick tonight’ before winking at me. 

Is it bad I was already thinking the same thing?

“What the hell did you say to him?” Jessica asks Harvey.

“Trust me you do not wanna know,” Mike says before Harvey has the chance to elaborate. “I think I need to go bleach my ears.”

Rachel just laughs at him. “We’ll see you guys back at the office on Monday.”

As they leave, Jessica looks at the two of us expectantly. “Well?”

“Just be thankful that what came out of his mouth didn’t become reality. Otherwise there might be a lawsuit on your hands,” I explained. “I took care of it.”

“So what I’m hearing is I should hire you to defuse all of the fires Harvey tends to ignite?”

I giggle, stepping into his side. “I think that spark is the exact reason you hired him in the first place.”

Harvey glances down at me, a fond, proud look in his eyes. He kisses the top of my head. “Plus, if you hired her, I’m not sure my production value would go up.”

“Well, now that that image is burned into my head, I’m gonna go drink it away. Oh, and Harvey?”

“Yes?”

“The next time you get the chance to punch Travis Tanner in the face, don’t hesitate.”

I stared at Jessica in disbelief, jaw to the floor. “I knew I liked her.”

“Yn,” Harvey spins me around to face him. He takes my face in his hands, scanning my eyes back and forth. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, he was just–”

“Did he try to touch you? Did he actually touch you?” 

I remove his hands from my face, grasping them in my own. “No, Harvey. He didn’t. I’m not sure Rachel would’ve let him take another step anyway. Who is that guy? Why do we all collectively hate his guts?

“I’ll tell you on the way home.”

“We’re leaving?”

“Fuck yes,” he hooks two fingers in his tie and yanks it loose. “I can’t stand being here anymore and I can’t stand seeing men gawk at what’s mine either.”

“Harvey, I don’t think everyone is gawking at me.”

So fast the room blurs, he pins my back to his front and grips my chin. “Just look around, Yn. Notice how everyone is sneaking glances at you? Even if they're with a date, everyone has their eyes on you. They always have their eyes on you. Fuck Yn… you have no idea just how easily you could bring all of them to their knees.”

“The only man in this room I want to see on their knees is you while you're between mine.”

Hearing the tremor in his breath does more things to me than I’d care to admit. “You’re gonna regret saying that. Let's go.”

~~~~~

On the car ride back, Harvey explains everything that has to do with Travis Tanner. Safe to say I am now a certified hater. What a fucking cunt. An actual asshole. And now knowing that he’s crossed and fucked with so many people I love and care about? Next time I see him I’ll put my fist through his face. 

Bitch. 

Enough thinking about this dick-wad. I have Harvey literally dragging me down the hallway from the elevator to his door. He shoves the key in on the first try (thank god) and slams it closed. My skin is on fire with a need for his lips all over me. 

I don’t care where. 

I need him everywhere. 

He easily picks me up and bends me over the side of the couch. Harvey’s hands carefully remove my sandals, placing kisses up my calves as he goes. Those skilled fingers of his move my skirt out of the way, pushing it up over my ass. 

He pauses. And I grin. 

“You are such a little devil, aren’t you?” A single finger trails up the inside of my thigh. Then a hand cracks down on my ass. My very bare ass. Did I purposefully not wear anything underneath? Yes. I absolutely did. 

“I figured you wouldn’t want to waste time.”

“Please,” he scoffs, “getting the privilege of undressing you is no waste of time.”

My heart aches. How could I have gotten a man with the most perfect mix of worship and corruption?

Harvey stands and presses his need into me. “Feel that? God Yn, you have no fucking clue what you do to me, do you? It still amazes me every time, how you take me so well.”

“I just like being good for you,” I admit. He grinds his hips harder, pushing me deeper over the couch. 

“Yeah? Gonna be good and take it, huh?” I nod as best I can. “Yeah, I know you will. On your knees first, pretty girl.”

There isn’t anything I’m not willing to do for Harvey when he calls me his pretty girl. It’s just a fact. 

Heat courses through me as I sink to my knees, staring at him. All the way up… Fuck he is so much bigger than I am. This might be the first time I’m truly noticing it. 

One button at a time, he undoes his shirt. He throws it to the side, making a show of the belt next.

“Give me your hands.” I give my wrists to him, watching carefully as he folds the belt into a figure-eight and gives it a tug into place. “Now open up, tongue out.”

A rough hand on my chin makes me open my mouth wide, tongue rolling out. He rolls his against his cheek, then spits in my mouth. The whimper I let out is embarrassing. I can’t help the flush that burns up my neck and to my cheeks. 

“You’re fucking mine.”

I’m breathless as he shoves down his dress pants and boxers. I don’t even get a chance to admire him before Harvey shoves all the way down my throat. Tears sting my eyes when I gag, but the feeling of him against my tongue outweighs my need for air. 

“For every tear that rolls down your pretty little face, I’m gonna make you cum that many times.”

Oh dear God…

Okay, I have to focus. 

I am careful about my breath control. Between the taste and the sound of him it’s incredibly difficult to focus on anything other than the outrageous throbbing between my legs. 

“Fuck, just like that pretty girl. Keep taking it so well and I’ll give you anything you want.”

He knows how to make my brain melt. I relax, letting him all the way down. He stays there, pelvis to my nose for a few seconds. I know he likes watching the tears form in my eyes, so I look up at him. 

“Aww, I know it’s so big for you. But you’re doing such a good job, Yn. Just a little more then I’ll give you what you really want. F-Fuck that feels so good.”

I grin internally, knowing he loves it when I press my tongue up onto the underside of his dick. I do it a few more times while he thrusts in and out, more than enjoying hearing him fall apart. 

For a few minutes, he rocks in and out. An abundance of praise falling from his lips. Telling me how pretty I look, explaining how I’m his and only his to see like this. I’d have no one else ever again. He has ruined me for anyone else. 

Precisely how I want it. 

“You wanna cum, don’t you, pretty thing?” Harvey mocks, grabbing my hair at the root and nodding it for me. “Yeah I know you do, you love it when I make you cum. Show me those tears, baby. As many as you want. Wanna make you feel so fucking good.”

When the tip of his cock hits the back of my throat, I choke. And he does it again, eyes trained on mine. I feel the tears swell up. Not too many, I’d like to be able to walk tomorrow. 

On purpose, he does it again. And again. And again until twin tears are rolling down my cheeks. One from each eye. 

“Two? Come on, I think you want more than that, don’t you?” I shake my head no, but he doesn’t let up. “If you don’t want more, then don’t let any others slip, sweetheart. I’m not done fucking your mouth yet.”

It’s relentless. His pace is nothing short of brutal, and it takes everything in me not to start sobbing. I tried to close my eyes, but he ripped his dick out of me so fast I almost fell over.

“Did I fucking tell you to close your eyes?”

“N-No Harvey,” I whisper. 

“Then keep them open.”

I have no choice but to obey. Somehow, I don’t let anymore breach the boundaries of my lashes. He didn’t wanna finish down my throat, so he pulled out and brought me to my feet. He thumbs my swollen lips, and I gently suck his finger. 

“You are gonna be the death of me, woman.”

“What a way to go,” I chide, earning myself a smack on the ass.

“Bed. Now.”

“Yes sir,” I respond, relishing the way his eyes darken. He removes the belt from my wrists, kissing the red marks. He picks me up, wraps my legs around his hips, and walks us to our room. 

The air in there is cold and my skin breaks into goosebumps. Or maybe it’s just the way he’s kissing me. Like he's worried I’m not real, some dream he’s going to wake up from. Desperate. Needy. Deprived. His hands grab around my waist and he throws me off of him. I land on the bed, about to prop myself up before he grabs my ankles and yanks me to the end of the bed. 

For a few moments, he just stares at me, guiding my legs open against the bed. His eyes ravaged me. An expression I’ve never quite seen before washes over him. His palms swallow my thighs. He pushes, pushes, pushes until they’re flat against the covers. Harvey goes to say something, but retracts it. 

“What, Harvey?”

He looks up at me like it’s the first time he’s seen me naked. And it is most certainly not the first time he’s seen me naked. 

“You’re just… fuck Yn you are so small compared to me.”

“I knew you had a thing for it,” I confirmed my hunch. 

“Seeing you tonight, without the heels on… it just did something to me. Something visceral. Something carnal. Knowing I can so easily do anything I want…”

Harvey knelt to the floor. The first brush of his tongue on my core made me sigh. He knows exactly what I like, what drives me crazy. And I have two orgasms coming my way tonight. No pun intended. 

I let my eyes close gently as he explores me. He reaches up and pinches a nipple between his fingers and it’s an effort to not writhe around. But his other palm is flat on my stomach, pinning me in place. I look down, seeing just how fucking big his hand is. Fucking hell–

“H-Harvey,” I gasp, feeling pressure build in my core, at the base of my spine. The tips of my fingers and toes begin to tingle. 

“Cum whenever you want, sweetheart.”

His permission is all I need. I let myself relax back, indulging in the freedom of his pleasure. I shiver when he sucks my clit hard, and I can see the grin on his face. Harvey spreads my legs far apart and keeps the exact pressure and motion of his tongue. I shake apart, endless praises falling from my lips. 

Harvey stops before it creeps into overstimulation and rises over me. I can smell myself on his lips when he kisses me, and the taste of my own release makes my brain fog with desire. 

I fist my hands in his hair, trailing kisses down his neck and chest. His physique drives me insane. Yes, he could absolutely do anything he wanted to me so easily. It fills me with the most delicious type of fear and desire. 

“Lay back down,” he commands. I comply without further instruction. I need to feel him. 

“Please, Harvey,” I beg. 

“Please what? Use your words, sweetheart. I can’t give you what you need if you don’t tell me. Or are you too fucked out? I still have to make you cum a second time, and you’re already begging for it? Pathetic, Yn. ”

A tremble rolls through me and I whimper. It’s the strain, the grit in his voice that makes it worse. “Need you to fuck me so good.”

“Yeah? You need me to fuck that tight little pussy of yours, baby?”

“Mhmm,” I nod, spreading my legs for emphasis. “Need it so bad. I’ve been so good for you tonight.”

“Yes you have. Wanna cum on my cock?”

“F-Fuck Harvey please,” I plead. 

I watch as he lines up with my pussy, and as he pushes in. He’s slow, draw it out so I feel every inch of him. Makes me as restless as possible. 

“Keep taking it, you can handle it. Stop whining, you slut. You love it. I know how much you crave me inside you. Just like that, sweetheart, just a little more.”

Harvey hooks his hands under my knees and pushes them flat against my sides, getting as deep as he can. He also pins my hands under them so I can’t move. With slow rolls of his hips into mine, I’m forced to take him all the way. I can feel him everywhere. It’s the most amazing type of overwhelming. The muscles in his abs and thighs ripple with every thrust and it drives me fucking insane. 

He laughs at me. Mocks me. 

“You are so cute like this. So adorable split open on my cock,” he coos, dragging his right hand all over my body. It cups my neck, then he plays with my chest. I lean into the touch, wondering how much more I can take before I shake apart. 

“Please make me cum, Harvey. Need it so bad,” I ask desperately. It’s a need I’ve never had before. “Fuck please please please.”

“You really wanna cum, don’t you, baby? You’ve been my good girl all night long. Doing exactly what I say. I think you deserve it.” The brush of his finger against my clit rips a scream from my throat. I was unprepared for just how much I was going to be able to feel it. It was so much. Borderline too much. Pleasure melted in and out of pain. But my body needed it. I wanted it so much. 

“Oh fuck,” I cried out, unable to sit still. I got a reprimanding smack to my thigh. 

“Hold still.”

My thighs went back to being flat, one of his arms pinning both of them. It was relentless. He was not going to stop until I came so hard the neighbors three floors below heard me scream his name. 

I was a mess when I came. My body bowed off the bed, physically unable to be stable. I wiggled around, fought against Harvey for even an inch of room to get away from his torture. 

“You’ll be done cumming when I say so. And I’m not fucking done with you.”

“Oh god Harvey please,” I begged. “F-Fuck fuck fuuuuck.”

I took a full breath only when he stopped rubbing my clit, just for a second while he pulled out and spat on my pussy. If I wasn’t numb from pleasure, I would’ve probably come a third time. He filled me up again, not being careful this time. 

I lay limp, content to let him use me in any way he wanted. He kept my legs up, fucking me hard. He didn’t care about whether or not I was feeling good. He knew he did his job. More than enough for me. Time to make him feel good. As best I could, I clenched around him. His palms splayed over my stomach, pressing firmly. 

His hips faltered. 

“God damn, Yn. I can fucking feel how big I am inside you. I bet you can feel it too. So fucking deep in there, and you’re being such a good girl. Taking it all and not complaining. My perfect little fuck toy, huh? Yeah you were made for me. Gonna fill you up so good.”

He flipped me over on my stomach, hiking up my hips so my ass sat in the cradle of his hips. He pinned my head down and fucked me harder than he ever has. His nails dug into my skin. I knew my ass was going to be bright red from the crack of his palm against my skin. 

“God you are so perfect, Yn. Such a good little slut. Gonna take it all? Not gonna spill a drop?” He yanked me up by my hair. I cried out a no, mind going a little stupid now. As if it wasn’t before. “Oh fuck–”

His hips stilled, and I could feel him throbbing inside me. He was buried all the way, and it felt too good. I tried to crawl away, but pulled me right back, fucking me on his cock. Nails raked down my back, and he chuckled when I shivered.

“Good girl, fucking such a good girl for me, Yn. You took me so well, sweetheart. You’re stretched so tight around me too, feel that?” The tip of Harvey’s finger trailed around my entrance and I hiccuped for a breath, a few stray tears spilling over. “Aww, you’re struggling so hard to keep it in. Come here.”

Harvey dragged me backwards so I sat in his lap. I let my head lull against his shoulder and went limp. 

“God I am still so hard…” Gently, Harvey fucked me on his cock. I moaned absently, too tired and spent to care. “You are so fucking amazing, Yn. My good girl. I’m the only who gets to fuck this pussy, you hear me? Your pussy is mine to fill. I’ll never get sick of watching you fall apart at my hands.”

“All yours,” I say, voice a little raw from screaming. 

“All mine.”

Vaguely I feel him slide me off his cock. I’m pretty sure he carried me to the bathroom because the next thing I know I’m in the tub with him gently cleaning me. His hands are soft, careful to avoid my most sensitive areas. It’s all gentle kisses and tender touches. Not only can he break me down, he always puts me back together. Brings me back to a safe, caring, loving reality. 

“Are you still awake, my love?” Harvey asks, running a brush through my wet hair. 

“Not for much longer if you keep massaging my head like that,” I smile, feeling all warm and fuzzy in his hands. 

“Do you need anything before we go to sleep?” Harvey asks. “It wasn’t too much for you, right?”

I shake my head, “No, of course not. Would’ve told you if it was. I liked it. A lot.”

“Good good.” I can feel his grin as he kisses both of my cheeks. “I’m glad you enjoyed it as much as I did.”

“If I had known sooner, I would’ve stopped wearing heels long ago,” I teased, finally opening up my eyes. 

“Yeah yeah yeah,” he smiled, that big goofy grin I fell in love with. “Ready for bed?”

“Mhm,” I humm. “I could use some water. And maybe a snack.”

“Blueberries and a chocolate chip cookie?”

“God you know me so well,” I swoon. I kiss my lips together, a silent demand for him to meet me halfway. Without hesitation, he does, then helps me into bed before going to the kitchen. When he returns, Harvey climbs into bed with me. I just look at him for a moment, really taking him in. 

“I love you, Harvey.”

His smile lights up his eyes. “I love you so much more, Yn.”

[keruimi]

He is Having a Fever

Pairing: Obanai Iguro x reader

Warning: Fluff, slight spoiler under his mask

A/n: Having difficulties posting this since there's a problem in tumblr. This is just a scenario unlike the usual oneshots because I'm running out of ideas so my apologies. I hope he is not ooc in this one and I hope y'all enjoy it!

_____________________________

One thing that is difficult when this guy gets sick is taking his food. This man being picky in food is tough enough but getting a fever where taste buds can get unpredictable is like a mission itself already.

You don't know what to cook for him without him getting nauseous.

Intake food became difficult for him because of what he went through in his childhood so you can't really complain when it comes to feeding him.

Another reason is his mask. He hasn't really shown you what's under his mask so that's another hindrance when you take care of him.

Especially on the first time he indeed got sick.

He was in denial at first until he finally couldn't ignore the hot feeling that couldn't be removed. It feels like he just finished his training.

The hot feeling of getting work up but at the same time, the feeling of fatigue like you just don't want to get up.

It was confusing.

It worsened when he refused to cooperate with you and just believed that medicine alone can heal it without resting.

"Obanai Iguro! What did I tell you about resting huh?" You called for him when you saw him training with his friend, Sanemi.

A lot of arguing took place before he abided by your wishes and followed you back to his estate.

"I was just out for a short time and you already went training. You really want your fever to spike up again"

He just sighed at your words before you felt his warm body hug you from behind.

"I can't stay still especially when you're not with me" he murmured that made you glance at his sleepy eyes.

You sigh in defeat before you pull him to his bedroom followed by a cough from him.

You sigh in worry before you take a bucket of clean water to wash him up.

You quietly unbutton his uniform as he lays his back on the bed frame.

"If you keep training without even taking a slight rest, you will really not get better" you spoke up again before he helped you remove his uniform.

"I thought it would be fine since--"

"Resting at night is not included" he sighed once again when you cut him off before you wash his body with cool water using a towel.

"Love, you really need to rest, okay? This will not take a week anyways" you spoke in a softer tone that made him lean on your hand that rested on his cheek.

"Let's remove your mask so you can breathe better" you once again ask him to remove it and he shook his head without any hesitations.

"Love..."

"I can't. I'm too scared to remove it" he whispered and you can't help but soften your gaze on his figure as he looks down on the blanket.

"You know, I won't leave. Sooner or later, you will show it to me" you set the bucket of water at the side table before walking to the closet to get his pajamas.

The moment you come back, it seems like he became more tired without the use of his mask.

It made you smile since he seems to get more comfortable without the bandages in his mouth. He can breath better.

"Love, do you want anything for dinner?"

He seems to tense up a little before he relaxes again when you help him change his clothing.

"I don't know. Can I just sleep?" He mumbled and laid his head on your shoulder that made you comb his hair.

"We can't do that. How about Zosui? It's nice to eat it in the cloudy weather" you spoke and you hear him hum as an answer.

"I don't want to be alone in the room" his words made you smile before you lay him down on the bed.

Your lover can really get clingy when he is under the weather. You decide to lure him to sleep so you can cook dinner and after a few minutes you finally manage to go to the kitchen.

You took your time making the rice soup as you check around the house to secure if everything is lock before finally finishing the meal.

You brought it to the bedroom along with yours so you can eat together since he won't oblige if he will be the only one eating.

You put the two bowls on the side table and put the bucket of water at the floor near the bed to give more space for the food and go back to the kitchen to get his water and medicine.

You started to wake him up after you prepared everything. He groggily wakes up as you peck the corner of his mouth that makes him freeze for a minute.

It was indeed the first time you saw his scars but the thing you prioritized the most right now is his fever so you could careless about it.

You pull the blanket off of him up to his knees so he can cool his body a little with the cold breeze tonight.

"Dinner's ready, Love" you assist him on sitting up but his slightly widened eyes are still gazing at you that lifted a small smile on your lips.

You cool down his food before offering a spoon of it to him. He slightly opened his mouth to receive it.

"You need to eat a lot so you can recover quickly." You mention as you mix his food for a while and continue helping him out before he lends his hand like he is asking for the food that made you give the food.

You sat beside him and he immediately rested his body to yours while he resumed eating as you started eating your own portion.

Sometimes, you tend to forget that he doesn't like to feel weak or useless even if he is having a cold or fever.

But you can't really help it when you love him. There is always the instinct to look after him since this is the only time he will lean on you.

The only time where you can take care of him instead of him always looking after you.

You glanced at his direction and saw him almost finishing his food.

"Do you want more?" You spoke up after the comforting silence as you nuzzled your head on his shoulder, feeling how warmer it is compared to his usual body temperature.

You felt him shake his head making you nod before putting your bowl down to get his water.

You wait for him to take his last bite before you take it away from his hands and lend the glass to him.

You took the wet towel again before you wiped his body again as an attempt to cool down his temperature.

"Take your medicine" I gave him the pill and he drank it without a second thought before putting the glass at the side table.

"How do you feel now?" You asked him as you raise his arm to run the towel on it as he just watches you do your own thing.

"Slightly better" he spoke followed by a kiss on your forehead before he leaned back at the bed frame.

"Eat your dinner, I'll wait for you here" you heard him in a more stable voice after eating the warm meal making you nod your head and clean the bowls and go your way to the kitchen.

When it's time for bed, you see him slightly hesitating on pulling you to him since he doesn't want you to get infected but it seems like he forgot that a while ago so you chose to sit beside his head and play with his hair to lure him to sleep once again.

"Thank you Y/n" he spoke with his arms around your waist while he rested his head near your legs, giving him a comfortable position feeling your presence with him.

"I love taking care of you Obanai" you murmured as you kept playing his hair as you saw him slowly closing his eyes.

"Because you got to see me in my vulnerable state" he grumbles with a slight disapproval making you let out a small laugh.

"Well, it showed me a different side of you" the atmosphere was warm and comforting, something good to be true as you felt him tighten his arms on your body making you run your hand on his arms to soothe the tension out.

"I'm glad to see every side of you" you whisper when you notice slightly drifting to the dream realm as you close your eyes to also rest.

If you just know...

You already fulfilled his dream.

And that is being beside him

[neerons]

Some of Leon Dompteur's best quotes

"Leon Dompteur. My favorite food is meat and alcohol. Hmm? Alcohol isn't food? Haha, that's true."

"You can imagine I'm some fictional character you like if that works better."

"Never mind the roses—it feels like I'm the one wilting without you in my arms. What then? What if I shrivel up and die while you're gone?"

"(...) Well, I'd rather be liked by you than a bunch of random women."

"Do you want to sleep with me tonight? Hey, I just meant sleeping! What were you thinking?"

"I swear, you're the bravest woman I've ever met. (...) I promise, we'll bring you home. That's the one thing I'm not backing down on. And... Don't do anything reckless." (—Leon telling Emma he'll save her along with his brothers from Obsidian)

"If you're struggling, it's okay to show me. I'm not gonna think less of you for it. So don't force yourself to smile."

"No running, no hiding, no looking away. If you need to cry, look at me and cry."

"When I opened my eyes again, I gazed at the woman before me in awe. She was so stunning that I regretted closing my eyes and even blinking." (—Leon's thoughts)

"I've always wanted to see you in a dress that I picked out... then strip you."

"(...) I'll come duel with you as soon as I'm done here." (—Leon keeping his promise to Licht)

"Good girl."

"But... I've wanted this for so long. I've wanted you... for so long."

"A special skill of mine, huh...? Oh, there's one I can think of right away. I bet I could beat anyone at competitive eating."

"I don't blame him for being charmed, though. She's just that amazing. Emma, you have no idea how much your presence means to me." (—Leon's thoughts about Jin and Emma)

"Good work. Even if no one else is watching you work hard, I will. Okay?"

"You must have taken quite a liking to her to go warning her like that. It was nice of you." (—Leon talking about Emma to Chevalier)

"Why don't I save everyone a lot of trouble and cut the lot of you down right now?" (—Leon to drunken men)

"Ever since I met you... the me I thought I'd killed... the me I thought was gone... he can't stop shouting to the heavens how happy he is."

"Owwww! What the hell? (...) you could at least wake me up some other way." (—Leon being woken up by Chevalier)

"I think it's actually kind of cute. It's meant to look like a rabbit, right?" (—Leon talking about Clavis' food to Clavis, Emma and Nokto)

"I can finally tell you what I've always wanted to tell you. Emma... I love you."

"What matters is that you haven't become a victim for the kingdom. Just knowing that is enough to reassure me. (...) She knew none of you would welcome her, yet she came here as the emperor's representative, to find peace for us all. Is there any of you with more resolve than that?" (—Leon defending Emma during an official meeting)

"Accepting who you are, and being able to open your heart to the people you love—that's what makes us strong."

"(...) I want to flirt with you. Please?"

"I can't be the only one left with a one-track mind. I need you to be as crazy for me as I am for you." (—Leon's thoughts)

"Sorry, I know I sound like a broken record, but you look so fine in that beautiful dress. I wish I had a picture of you to frame."

"She's the silver lining in my clouds, my sun who makes my future bright. When I think about her, I'm filled with the courage to face whatever may come my way. She's truly an amazing woman and the light of my life." (—Leon talking about Emma)

"Maybe instead of the one doing the savoring, you'd prefer to be savored?"

"I adore you. Even if I were to make the entire world my enemy, I'll never let go of you."

"I want to melt you with my touch until you're left crying my name into the night." (—Leon's thoughts)

"I want you to be at my side just as you are, I want you to be my queen just as you are."

"There's only one thing that I can think of that would help stop me being so reckless. (...) Mmm... I don't know, it seems a bit too easy to just go ahead and tell you. Why don't you guess? (...) And every time you get it wrong, I get to kiss or touch you. How does that sound? (...) Can you even think coherently when you're this wet and needy?"

"Honestly, you can call for me even if nothing happens. I don't mind. I'd still gladly come running."

"Every time we touch, every time we kiss, every time we say we love each other, my feelings for you grow stronger."

"If we continue, you're going to see me possibly the horniest I've ever been in my life."

"Sorry, kid, but you were born way too late. Plus, she's already spoken for. But at least he has good taste." (—Leon's thoughts about a boy asking Emma to marry him)

"You're so beautiful that I don't know what to do with myself."

"I'm so harsh on you first thing in the morning, aren't I? (...) I ate my fill, but now I already want you again."

[georgeclarkesgf]

Hiiiiii ❤️❤️

Would you be up for writing any George Clarke fics about labour or birth???

here you go lovely <3

if you had to describe your labour in three words they would be long, painful and frustrating.

baby girl clarkey had clearly found your uterus an enjoyable place to live the past nine months. you were nine days overdue when your water broke and throughout labour, she seemed to be refusing to descend. in an attempt to lessen the pain and quicken the process, the midwife recommended a birthing ball. you nodded, hoping gravity would do its job. you were also grateful for anything that would provide you with some relief. george carefully guided you to sit on the ball since he wanted to be useful in any way he could. a tired smile was thrown his way and he felt like crying seeing how much pain you were in.

"i'm so incredibly proud of you my love. it won't be long till we get to meet our babygirl," he presses a lingering kiss to your forehead and moves behind you to redo your hair, "i hope she looks like you."

"why?" you questioned, sensing the start of yet another contraction.

"cause you're beautiful."

"you're so cheesy." george's jaw dropped, pretending to be offended.

he started massaging your back as you concentrated on breathing through another contraction. the midwife kept checking your progress and her heartbeat and after what seemed like days, she finally said the words you were so excited and yet so scared to hear.

"alright y/n, it's time to push. let's have this baby." you turned to look at george, a terrified expression on your face.

"baby, you can do this. everyone knows it." he gave you a reassuring smile.

the midwife and george went to help you up off the ball to the bed before you stopped them, "wait, i want george there. on the bed i mean. behind me."

in a matter of seconds, he was on the bed after getting the midwife's nod of approval and removing his shoes and jumper. before the need to push hit, you got comfortable, laying against george's chest. screaming, crying, and lots of encouraging words filled the next few minutes. you gripped george's hands tightly as each contraction came and pushed hard until the sound you had been waiting months to hear filled the room.

your beautiful baby girl's cry.

she was placed on your chest, and a rush of overwhelming love and relief flooded over you. tears filled your eyes as you took in every detail of her. her tiny fingers and toes. her nose which she definitely got from you. everything about her was perfect. george, who was also crying, kissed your shoulder and stroked his baby girl's cheek.

"she's so perfect," he whispered, "i'm so, so, so proud of you. i love you."

BONUS

(i was gonna just end it there but i wanted to include telling the boys so have this)

you were in love with her, and both of you were enjoying and starting to adjust to life as a family of three, even if it had only been a few hours. labour had exhausted you but you seemed too overwhelmed with emotions to be able to sleep. you also hadn't had time to since both your families had arrived, wanting to meet the newest addition and check up on you both.

"george?" he hummed in acknowledgment, still enamored with his baby girl.

"you wanna facetime chris and them lot?" his head popped up at the question, moving from the side of the cot to sit by you on the bed.

"you sure? i don't want it to be too much. and i was quite enjoying our baby bubble." he brushed a piece of hair from your face, scanning your face for any sort of hesitance.

"me too," you agreed, "but i think they'll notice something's off when you don't go to the flat to watch the match tonight."

"well, i was still gonna go," he had a cheeky smirk on his face, watching for your reaction, to which you raise your eyebrows, "i'm joking. yea okay, let's facetime them."

george grabbed his phone and face timed chris, knowing the rest of the group will already be there for the match. the phone rang for a few seconds before he answered.

"alright mate?" chris asked, before realising george wasn't on his way like he thought he would be, "where are you? we're all waiting for you."

"uh, i actually won't make it tonight. something's come up. who's there anyway?" shouts of disappointment came from the other end of the phone and you couldn't help but quietly laugh.

"literally everyone. mr television, mr hill, chip, will, cal. you know the rest, do i have to name everyone? it's the boys." george cringed at that, knowing chris only says it to wind him up.

"chris, just shut up. can you put the phone somewhere please, i need everyone to be able to see me," you both watched as the phone was placed on the table and everyone filtered into shot one by one, "also, can someone please record this on their camera if they have it with them?"

you grabbed george's hand, knowing he was nervous, and nodded at him as though to ask if he was ready since you could hear some of the boys asking what was going on. he passed the phone to you, earning more looks of confusion before chip spoke up.

"y/n, we love you but what's with the teasing. we have a game to watch." you rolled your eyes, feeling the bed dip from george having just brought over your baby girl.

you couldn't contain your smile, "we have a surprise." you turned the camera to george, who was cradling your daughter in his arms.

the other end of the phone was silent for a few moments before they erupted into cheers.

"will, you owe me fifty quid." cal cheered, turning to him with a hand out expectantly.

"hang on a minute, you guys were betting on when i'd give birth?" you gasped as they all nodded their heads.

"you were nine days past your due date y/n. it was only a matter of time." will confirmed, handing cal his money.

"congratulations though guys, she's gorgeous. does she have a name yet?" arthur tv asked, as they all quieted down waiting.

you glanced at george, who nodded, knowing you had your heart set on a name, "yea. this is isla."

questions came one after the other from the boys, but george knew you were tired and isla needed to be fed. dad mode was evidently activated.

"guys calm down. we'll answer the questions when we see you but for now, you have a match to watch and we have a baby to feed. we just wanted you to know she was here." you all said goodbye to each other before the call ended, allowing you to go back to your own little bubble.

"we did it." you whispered, staring at the tiny little girl who somehow looked even smaller in george's arms.

"we did."

[ramayantika]

Since I am newly nineteen now, here are 18 things I learnt hehe

1. Sometimes life is shit but you got to hold on with all your blood, sweat and tears, with hopes still illuminating your eyes in the darkest night, because better days do come. My world did not end when I did not crack those entrance exams and saw the house be so disappointed with me. Another course and college chose me, and I found my calling and happiness.

2. Grinding is needed. Youth demands hardwork if you want to make it big, but listen fucking listen to your body and rest at times. Your dream life will never let you enjoy if you do not have the health for it. Exercise, be hydrated, eat and sleep well. As students, I understand it gets hard at times, but try maintaining a habit slowly. It pays well later.

3. It is okay to not know shit about what you want in life. If you know, amazing! If you do not, good, because life is going to surprise you with some real amazing things. You will find your story. Wait.

4. For young girls, for my younger self, you are amazing, smart, talented, wanted, admired and a beautiful human. You can be anything you want, and no matter what the world says about you, what your family says about you, you absolutely have the power to build and live the life you want for yourself. It's hard, but it can be done.

5. Just because you are naturally a quiet and reserved person, it doesn't mean you are boring, less confident and no fun. You value your energy and people. It's good. You are a good listener and a good observer. People need listeners too and your observation skills do actually help you socially when needed.

6. Just because you are extroverted, it doesn't mean you are loud, cringe and irresponsible. Heck the quiet ones like me need you all and of course we do need someone to keep the party and conversation interesting. But even then, you can absolutely be vulnerable and have someone to share your mind and heart too.

7. Follow your HOBBIES!!!! dancing, painting, singing, writing, sports etc whatever is your pick, keep doing it. You need them. You don't have to monetize it or be so skillful to make a job out of it. You can follow it because you love it and it makes you happy and not because you must make a career out of it. Life gets busy, and even difficult at times. Hobbies will help you take you mind off from difficult things. Do it for 15 mins or 30 or even an hour. But DO IT.

8. For young people, do NOT get into romantic relationships because everybody else is getting in to. Life doesn't comprise of romantic relationships. Learn to build and value friendships, relationships with classmates, older people (relatives, teachers, seniors) and with people near and around you.

9. Money is needed and money does help buy happiness. You get to watch your movies, buy your favourite pizza/momos/biryani, go to your fav cafe, buy books and art supplies, buy that lip gloss or that new shoes model with money. Paisa bhai sab kuch nahi hai yes but paisa bahut kuch hai.

10. Cherish little moments of peace and find gratitude for the things that you have. You are alive, you get to do art, play a sport, read that fanfic on the internet, afford eating at a good restaurant, afford an education etc. There is still so much you need but at least you get to have some good things in life. Some don't and have to struggle immensely for things which we have.

[nucleo-bang-tan]

The Uisa's Daughter | Chapter 1v : Her Grief

Pairing/s: Kim Taehyung X Reader, Jeon Jungkook X Reader

Genre: Medieval Korea AU, Mystery, Strangers to Lovers, Angst, Smut

Rating/s: 18+ Mature Themes

Warning/s: Grief and lots of it, King tries to sleep with her, the real Jungkook... And ofcourse, wouldn't be a nucleobangtan fic without shitty ass writing and really bad pacing.

Summary: In the 1700s, the Jeon Dynasty spread all across the Korean peninsula.  Happiness quadrupled with the founder Emperor's presence, or so it seemed. Secrets scattered over the palace in the capital city, Hanseong were known to none except a few.

Chapter Summary: Curiousity did not kill the cat. Atleast not yet.

A/N: Not proofread!!! Please leave comments, I would love to hear from you guys. Critique my writing and tell me if I'm doing anything wrong, really appreciate it.

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Teaser Prologue Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The morning sun rose, casting a gentle light on a world that felt colder without your lover. You sat quietly on the window sill, surrounded by memories, each one a bitter reminder of his absence.

The ache in your heart was painful, a silent testament to the love you shared and the deep void his death had left in your life. It had been exactly three weeks since your wedding day, but it felt like an eternity without him. Every day dragged on, the minutes stretching into hours.

You couldn't help but tear up. The syllables 'Taehyung' gave you flashbacks of your bloodied lover. The nights were sleepless and even if you did manage to close your eyes, the flashbacks didn't spare you.

Amidst everything, Yoongi's life was taken because he wanted to protect you. How you unapologetically wished it was your father who was slain.

The emptiness in your heart grew bigger and bigger with each passing moment. Every night, the King would visit your chambers. He hoped that you would give in to his demands, let him use you the way he had hungered for years.

But you never let him. You were always closed off and barely talked to him. He didn't wish to force you but you were surely making it difficult for him. King Jeon knew you never wanted him, but he never stopped pursuing.

"Why are you sad?" An endearing voice pulled you out of your thoughts. You smiled, wiping the tears on your cheeks.

"I just... I lost someone I loved." The little child climbed onto the window sill as well, sitting on your lap.

"I lost someone too, once. But I don't remember anything." He said, slightly frowning.

"Was it the Queen? Your mother?" You patted his fluffy, brown hair.

"How did you know, Y/n? Oh, I'm sorry! Father said I should call you my mother."

"We are barely 12 years apart. I'm more like your sister. You don't have to call me your mother if you don't wish to, Jungkook."

He giggled, "I love it when you call me that!"

You furrowed your eyebrows, "Call you what?"

"'Jungkook' of course!" He said, slightly jumping out of happiness in your lap.

You figured not everyone called him by his name, either addressing him as Prince or majesty.

"I'm more than happy to call you by your name, Jungkook."

"Yes! It's my name! I am the great warrior, Jeon Jungkook." You laughed slightly at his excitement. His innocent soul found delight in the littlest of things.

Over the past couple of weeks, little Jungkook had been your source of joy. He had a lot of energy, whenever you didn't feel like getting up, Jungkook forced you to play with him. Unknowingly, it helped you to handle the grief a lot better.

Ofcourse, he was a bit spoiled, being the Prince of an entire country does come with a lot of luxuries. But the kindness and bright nature overtook his spoiled attitude. The kid was the type to throw a tantrum when the chef didn't make his favorite food but then apologize for his behavior in the cutest way possible.

"Oh! I have a letter for you." He said, pulling out an envelope from his hanbok.

You furrowed your eyebrows, "A letter? Did you write it?"

"No, that person told me to give it to you. They got it from your friend." He said.

According to Jungkook, there was a person in the palace worried for your well-being. It was probably a maid who used to work for your father, you thought. You weren't allowed to leave your chambers, so letters were the only mode of communication.

You took the envelope in your hand and carefully opened it. You hoped it was who you thought it was: your childhood friend.

Dear Y/n,

I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing this two days after your wedding with the King. But I would imagine it will take a few days to reach you considering all the security. But I was promised by my friend that it'll reach you, no matter what happens, and I trust that.

I cannot fathom the pain that you are enduring. Losing two people in a single day, seeing them lose their light in front of you. I am sorry I couldn't be there. I understand why you hate the King. I am sorry for the times I shushed you when you were speaking ill about him. He isn't kind at all.

Yoongi was a great person and my friend as well. And about Taehyung... I am writing this letter to tell you what he wished you knew. He had kept this in the past but I am sure he meant to tell you this in the time to come.

He was no ordinary farmer. Taehyung used to be an assassin in the royal army. He climbed up ranks as soon as he joined the army. Ofcourse his identity was and is a secret to the mass. He was a brutal man, assassinating whoever wronged the King. He was loyal to the Jeon family.

There were also rumors that wives and women of aristocratic families paid him to sleep with them, and that is how he knew a lot of the secrets of the royals and high class families. The rumors were proved to be true and that made King Jeon furious. He was eventually removed from his position and was sent back.

This is all I know about the matter.

Y/n, how I wish I could be there for you. Your parents have no maids and servants now after what your father did. Although I am trying my best to get work back at the palace to be closer to you, the King is stubborn. He is not taking any chances and his trust in me has dwindled due to your father.

I believe in you. There are talks of a revolution inspired by Taehyung and Yoongi, talks to save you. Until then, I believe you will hold on. My friend at the palace will treat you well.

For now, all I can say is keep safe and do not let the King get to your head. You have seen worse now, have you not?

Do not lose hope.

Love,

Jung Hoseok

You read the letter slowly, each word sinking in. Hoseok’s message was a lifeline, a reminder that you were not alone. He was out there, fighting for you, and there was a glimmer of hope in the talk of revolution. You clutched the letter to your chest, drawing strength from his words.

Jungkook watched you with wide eyes, sensing the importance of the letter. "Is it good news?"

You smiled through your tears, nodding. "Yes, Jungkook. It's good news. Thank you for bringing it to me."

He beamed, his innocent joy a balm to your wounded heart. "I'm glad!"

As you tucked the letter away safely, you felt a renewed sense of determination. You would endure this, for Taehyung, for Yoongi, and for the future Hoseok envisioned. You would not let the King break you.

You remembered Taehyung fighting the palace guards masterfully, his moments were fluid and graceful. He was formidable until that soldier 'defeated' him on King's command.

You remembered Taehyung often telling you a thing or two about the aristocrats and high ranking officials. How the husbands were unfaithful and all the wives could do was sit there with a smile, because if they held any other expression, they would be beaten and bruised. He also mentioned the wives paying men for some satisfaction as their husbands found solace in anyone but them.

You remembered the way he held you whenever he made love to you. His movements reflected clear experience. You never asked him why it was.

He hated the nobility and the privileged yet he slept with wives. You couldn't help but wonder what made him go through with that. King Jeon, who had several affairs, would not remove Taehyung from his post simply because of what he did. There had to be more to that.

"Who is the letter from?" The patiently awaiting Jungkook asked.

"A friend of mine, Hobi. He is the sweetest person there is." You smiled, patting his head, "Thank you for delivering this to me."

"Will you play with me now?" He asked eagerly.

"Do you have a game in mind, little Prince?" You were more than delighted to have Jungkook. He kept you busy and didn't let you think much about the happenings.

"Hide and seek? But your chamber does not have places to hide." He pouted.

"That's alright. We can play something else."

"Can we go play in the courtyard? Father is visiting the kingdom. He won't know of it."

Knowing what the King can do, you didn't want to put Jungkook in trouble. Even if a single soul caught you outside of your chamber, you could face the King's wrath. But you could handle it, the 7 year old could not.

"Jungkook, you know I cannot. Let us play something else, yes?"

"I am the Prince, I promise you father would never know." He said haughtily.

"But you would get into big trouble." You sighed, trying to convince the little boy.

"I have people to protect me, do not worry."

"Against your father? I don't think so, Prince."

He shook his head, "I have people to protect me against anyone in this world."

"Jung-"

"No! You are playing hide and seek with me and I won't hear anymore from you."

You held the Prince's shoulders, trying to stop him from throwing a tantrum, "What if the King hurts you? What will I do then?"

He laughed, "He will be killed before he touches me."

You furrow your eyebrows, who would be foolish enough to kill a man like that? But then again, Jungkook was the future of the Jeon Empire. He must definitely have loyal guards.

"Are you sure about this? If we get caught, you say nothing. I would take the blame on me, alright?"

He nodded, "Yes! I am more than sure."

"Then let us play in the courtyard for an hour or so."

He jumped off of your lap in excitement, almost stumbling and falling. But he caught himself just in time.

"Try and catch me." You said, getting up from the window sill and running outside your chamber.

You knew the palace well enough to navigate through the confusing corridors. Somehow, it was exactly like the recurring dream you have about the non-existent prince and his dog, Bam.

The two of you laughed as you ran through the hallways of the palace. Mindfulness was long forgotten as your voices echoed. Everyone who crossed your paths didn't bother you when they saw the Prince running with you.

"Alright, do you want to hide?" You asked as you both reached the courtyard.

"Yes, but promise you won't peek." He said, clearly having experienced dishonesty while playing this game before.

"I won't, do not worry. I will count to 50, that is enough time for you to hide." He nodded as you closed your eyes and faced a large tree.

Time passed and you played with the child for more than an hour, after which you retired back to your chamber.

You were tired to say the least. Following a bath, you cuddled up to a large cushion, your hair still slightly wet. And as per usual, thoughts flooded your mind. Thoughts which made you cry out in pain.

Every single one of them consisted of your lover. The image of his smile as King Jeon pushed the sword deeper was etched into your brain.

You regretted meeting Taehyung. It was his fault you learned how to dream. It was his fault you dreamt of a better life, a life with just him and you. But it was your fault you held him with you. You were curious what love was, so you held onto him with everything you had.

Love always leads to misfortune. You never believed it existed until you met him. But seeing how the two of you ended, proved to be a constant reminder that it shouldn't exist. Love seemed much better when you thought it was a myth.

Your thoughts were cut off by the sound of the door opening. You looked out the window, it was dark outside. You knew who it was and you were ready to do anything to stop him from doing as he wished.

"Today was really tiring." He said, closing the door. You didn't move at all and stayed facing away from him.

You felt the bed dip behind you but you still didn't move. But you did visibly flinch at his touch on your shoulder. His large hand rubbed against your upper arm.

"All of my subjects adore me, tell me, why is it that you tremble at my touch? Perhaps the excitement?" He laughed.

"Stop being delusional." You whispered.

"What was that?" His aged ears did not pick up your words.

"I said, stop being delusional." You said in a firm tone, getting up from the bed and stepping away from it.

The King looked up at you and his laughter grew in volume. He was clearly entertained by your withdrawal.

His laughter seized and his gaze turned dark, "Delusional? My Queen, you are the one deluding yourself. You thought you could live a perfect life with that lad? He used you for money and pleasure."

"Get lost, I plead with you. Do not speak a single word about him. He never wanted me for my money. He was a real man, unlike you." You were agitated by his words. Your voice trembled with anger, yet you tried to keep a strong expression.

He got up from your bed and walked towards you, "You have not given me a chance to prove myself yet, have you now?"

"Leave." You gritted, hands clenched into fists.

His tall and wide frame towered above yours, "Oh, what if I don't, what if I..." He raised his hand to touch your cheek but you swatted it away.

"You are fucking disgusting."

The King turned his head to the side and let out a bitter chuckle. Without a word, he turned around and walked out of your chamber leaving you trembling with fear and anger all over.

Your labored breaths slowed down. You were supposed to hold on till someone rescued you, but he made it increasingly difficult to do so.

You laid on the cold bed. Hatred was boiling inside of you. How you wished Taehyung was there to comfort you, guide you through it all. You were tired but it seemed sleep evaded you.

On nights like these, you always imagined Taehyung was holding you tight and secure. You had never gotten a chance to sleep with him overnight, but your imagination proved to be a good companion.

You sighed, letting your tears fall once again, "I hate you so much for leaving." You whispered to your imaginary Taehyung.

You felt so broken, so cursed. Your own skin felt foreign.

"I suppose I have to hold on... for you."

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"I am the undefeated Jeon Jungkook." The little child jumped around waving his wooden sword. His energy truly surprised you. Maybe you were just lazy but the boy played from sunrise to sunset and he still wished to play more.

You were sitting on a bench in the courtyard. The cherry blossom trees overhead provided enough shade for you to relax. Jungkook was fighting with the falling pink leaves.

It had been exactly 2 months since your wedding day. Spring had almost come to an end. The Korean Peninsula experienced a monsoon which seemed to be arriving soon considering the wind. You remembered when your father taught you about various seasons across the world. You didn't find the information interesting, always leaning more towards human anatomy and science.

You could see Jungkook's caretaker arriving in a hurry. You weren't afraid of being spotted by her outside of your room, she was the type to scold you for it but would never tell the King. The frail lady was Yoongi’s mother and you could see the resemblance in her cat-like eyes.

It wasn’t long ago when you had first met her. She had approached you with a stoic face, similar to that of Yoongi, but she was the sweetest woman you had met. She introduced herself as Mrs. Min, caretaker of the youngest child of the Jeon family.

Immediately you asked if she knew Yoongi, to which she hesitated to answer. After a bit of coercion, she admitted she was the mother of a traitor. She was ashamed of her son but knew he had his own reasons to rebel. You could tell she loved him dearly. She was taken aback when you embraced her and said that Yoongi was a brave person and fought for what he believed.

"My Prince, my Queen..." The old woman bowed.

You pressed your lips together and gave her a small nod in return, "What is it, Mrs. Min?"

"If I may, Eunuch Kang has requested the little Prince's presence." She said. Her small and wrinkly smile seemed the most trustworthy in the entire palace.

Eunuch Kang, though, always seemed a little too suspicious. Always keeping an eye on everything and everyone, supporting the Emperor's evil deeds and always advising him to do the cruelest thing possible.

"I shall be back Y/n, wait for me." Jungkook said, handing you his sword.

"You must not call her by her name, she is your mother." His caretaker gasped.

"Alright then, I shall be back, mother." Jungkook's tone made you silently laugh a little. He didn't want to call you his mother, but he had to in front of everyone.

You waved with a smile until Jungkook and Mrs.Min were out of sight.

It had been so long since you had been alone with nature. You decided to take a walk barefoot to feel the grass between your toes.

There were all kinds of flowers, trees and herbs in the garden. There was a tiny path amongst the herbs through which you decided to stroll.

You enjoyed the walk until you found yourself in an unfamiliar part of the garden. The palace grounds were vast and intricate, making it easy to lose your way. They were connected to various training areas, lakes and even a forest.

You had no intent to escape, though. Where would you escape to? All you knew was the capital city of Hanseong. Hypothetically, you would have to travel a distance of 150 km to escape the Jeon Empire. Even then, there was no guarantee that the border guards would let you pass.

Your eyes sparkled when you spotted a rare imported herb, saffron. These weren't naturally grown in your country, and this was the first time you saw a saffron plant. You squatted down to get a better look at the delicate flowers.

“You should get a better grip on the sword.” You heard a faint voice from a distance. The person was with someone else, you could tell. Your hands subconsciously touched the flowers as you heard their conversation. Maybe you could find some crucial information, you thought.

“How are you so good with the bow and not the sword, Jimin?” The same voice groaned.

The second person, supposedly Jimin seemed extremely annoyed, “I do not fucking care, I am leaving.”

You were so focused on the conversation, you failed to notice the increasingly clouded sky overhead. The clouds were already full and ready to pour.

You slowly walked to the direction of the voices, mindful not to step on dried leaves. As you drew closer, the figures came into view—a young man, possibly Jimin, and another whose face you couldn't quite see.

Quickly, you ducked behind a nearby tree, peering out cautiously. The branches provided a decent cover, allowing you to observe without being noticed.

Jimin was visibly frustrated, pacing back and forth, while the other person, a taller, stern-looking man, tried to reason with him. The wind picked up, rustling the leaves, but you remained perfectly still, straining to catch every word.

Your breath caught as the man turned around, revealing his face and his topless torso. His toned muscles glistened with sweat under the clouded sky. He held a sword with effortless grace, the weapon gleaming in the dim light.

You couldn't help but admire his chiseled features and strong arms, a testament to years of rigorous training. His strong jawline moved as he spoke to Jimin. His dark, obsidian hair fell in damp strands over his forehead, and his doe eyes, which reminded you of the little Prince, were focused on his comrade, a mix of frustration and concern evident in his gaze.

You tore your eyes away, feeling your cheeks warm. But curiosity killed the cat, and you were much like one. Your curiousity always led to trouble, you knew it. It was best to leave, you thought.

The downpour was relentless, you tried your best to see ahead. The smell of fresh rain filled your senses. The entire garden turned into a muddy mess not long after. You needed to find shelter, the trees weren't much help.

However, in your hurry, you slipped, and fell knee first on the ground, letting out a squeal. Not your best moments, you could say. Great, your hanbok was dirty, you were drenched and lost, and now you were probably bleeding.

“Fuck, what are you doing here?” A voice called out, concerned yet surprised. And now you were caught.

You looked up to see the topless soldier from earlier, his eyes wide with alarm. Before you could say anything, he swiftly picked you up, one hand under your knees and one around your back. You gasped, instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck for support.

“We need to get you out of this rain.” He yelled over the loud thrumming of rain. He carried you as if you weighed nothing. He moved quickly through the muddy garden, his steps confident and sure despite the slippery ground. Within moments, he reached a nearby stable.

He was barely panting as he let you down on your feet. You could sense him staring at you with his round eyes as you shivered due to the awfully cool climate. His presence, though casual, brought a strange sense of comfort amid the chaos.

"Who are you?" You looked at his drenched form, mirroring yours. The only thing that differed was his bare torso. A sudden realization made fear shoot through every nerve of your body. He seemed to be a commander of higher rank and you just made him save your clumsy self from the rain. What if he tells the emperor? You could be put to death for just being here.

"I am sorry but you need to be more aware of your surroundings." He said trying to sound nonchalant. He could see the fear in your eyes but chose to ignore it. Did he scare you?

"I-I'll keep that in mind." You bowed fervently.

"Jungkook..."

"What?" You tilted your head in confusion.

"I am Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook." Prince Jungkook?

You chuckled, “Ofcourse you are.” You rubbed your arms briskly to generate some warmth.

He furrowed his eyebrows, “What do you mean?”

“You are not Prince Jungkook. But you do look like him, I must admit.” You removed the outer coat of your hanbok, the wet clothing being a bit too uncomfortable.

“Why do you think that, my Queen?” He was amused.

“Because, you are not Jungkook. He is the 7 year old Prince of the Jeon Empire.” You pressed.

His amusement reached new levels, “That little kid? You think he is Jeon Jungkook?”

“Yes! Are you jesting me?” You looked at his very, very familiar face. It was as if you had seen him a million times, but you hadn't. Keeping your eyes on him was dangerous territory, yet you couldn't help but continually glance at him.

“I need to have a talk with him.” He laughed.

You raised your eyebrows, “You sure do have some arrogance.” How could a soldier like him stand on equal grounds with the Prince?

“Why is it arrogant to have a talk with my baby brother?” He folded his arms over his chest, biceps flexing as he did so.

“B-Brother? He is surely not-” You had second thoughts, though. His eyes? “Oh, his cousin?” you asked.

He shook his head, “I hope not. We are siblings.”

Surely the man was lying. How did you not know about the existence of another Prince, who could be the heir to the Jeon Empire? But then again, you didn't know the younger Prince existed until a few weeks ago.

You cleared your throat, you were still the Queen, you had superiority, you needn't be afraid, “And your name is?”

“I was not lying when I said I was Jeon Jungkook.” The corner of his mouth lifted slightly.

“You are not Jungkook.” Your mind was processing a million things at the moment. If the man in front of you was Jungkook, who was the child you had befriended?

As if he could hear your thoughts, he answered, “I am the heir to the throne, Prince Jungkook. And the kid, he's my brother, Jeon Junghyun.”

[montammil]

June of Doom Day 7 - "What happened?"

| Nightmare | Isolation | Stumbling |

Characters: Lawrence, Marshall

For once, I decided to make Lawrence the super emotionally vulnerable one lol.

CW: Parental whumper, stockholm syndrome, nightmares, death (in nightmare), yandere whumper

...

Lawrence woke up with a jolt. He'd been in the middle of a nightmare, but then realized his blankets were tossed onto the floor. His hands were shaking as he rubbed his eyes, pushing his sweat-soaked hair from his face.

He clutched his own beating heart and tried to slow his breaths, which turned to pants as the anxiety gripped his lungs.

It took a few minutes for him to finally calm down. He ran his fingers over his wet cheeks. It had been a while since he had such an awful dream.

He didn't even remember what it was about until he thought of Marshall.

Those green eyes that normally shone so bright were dull in his hellscape of a dream. The light in them was snuffed out, and Lawrence screamed so loud in his dream, his throat felt sore in real life. He scrambled out of bed and hurried into Marshall's bedroom, slamming open the door.

He was expecting to see his boy there, sleeping as restlessly as he usually did, but his bed was empty.

Lawrence froze for just a moment, and then felt back on the verge of a panic attack.

"MARSHALL?!" he cried, racing out of the room and stumbling down the hall so fast he nearly slipped and fell. There was no way, he wasn't gone. He couldn't be gone. His nightmare wasn't reality.

He frantically opened the doors, ignoring how loud they slammed into the walls. It didn't matter to him in this moment.

He continued screaming his name, but was interrupted by the sound of the toilet flushing and a door opening. He let out a strangled sound and bolted for the bathroom.

Marshall emerged, rubbing his eyes blearily.

He was just as Lawrence had left him hours earlier: in a loose pajama shirt and sweats, with his thick brown hair tangled from sleep.

Lawrence ignored the puzzled look on Marshall's face as he tackled him into a hug, letting out a choked sob. Marshall tensed, but relaxed in the embrace, patting his back awkwardly. He let Lawrence fuss over him, looking him over for injuries.

"What happened? Am I in trouble? I was just using the bathroom," Marshall anxiously explained. His eyebrows shot up. "Woah, are you crying?"

Lawrence sniffled and pulled away, pressing his palms against Marshall's shoulders. "You're okay. You're okay," he repeated. Marshall was sure he had completely lost his mind. He ran his fingers through Marshall's hair. "God, don't scare me like that ever again, do you hear me? Please, please, never do that again."

"Uhh, okay... sorry." Marshall learnt the best way to avoid getting scolded or worse was to just go along with it. Even if he had no clue what he did. "Did you have a bad dream or something?"

"Yeah... wanna sit on the couch, watch a movie?"

"It's two in the morning."

Lawrence put his arm over his shoulder and led him out of the bathroom. "So? We can make hot cocoa, you love that stuff. And what ever movie you want!" Marshall looked hesitant. "Please, kiddo? I don't want to be alone right now. We can sleep in extra late tomorrow, and I can even bake you those madeleines. And I can even make--"

"Okay, okay! No need to bribe me." Marshall gave him a lopsided smile.

Lawrence returned the smile. He had been so terrified to go to sleep ever again after that. The thought of losing Marshall drove him mad. He couldn't stand the thought of losing his child to anything.

They settled on the couch with their cups of hot cocoa, a warm blanket, and one of Marshall's favorite movies.

Marshall hated to admit it, but he was genuinely worried over his captor. He scooted closer, to lean his head on his shoulder. "Do you wanna talk about it? The nightmare?"

The blond turned his head towards him. He pondered it for a moment. "It was about you." His grip on the mug tightened. "You don't need to hear about it, Marshie. I don't wanna traumatize you."

Marshall resisted the urge to tell him he didn't do a good job at that. "No, I want to. If, um, you're willing to tell me."

"I..." Lawrence trailed off. Marshall didn't know if it was a good idea to press him further or not, but Lawrence then went on, "I don't know the details, but you were hurt. You were crying, and there was a lot of blood. And I couldn't do anything to help you. I just had to watch you--" His voice cracked and he cut himself off. Marshall's eyebrows knitted together. "But then I woke up and you weren't in your room, and I thought maybe that was it, that it had all happened in real life."

"Oh." Marshall stared at the TV screen, not knowing where else to look. It hurt to look at the pain in Lawrence's eyes.

Lawrence wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "I'm sorry. You shouldn't be listening to this, I'm supposed to be the one comforting you." He laughed, but it came out as more of a strangled sob.

Marshall didn't know what to do. He put his mug down on the coffee table and turned so he could hug him properly, wrapping his arms around his torso.

"I'm okay. See? I'm here with you. Nothing's gonna happen to me. Not if you're watching over me," he reassured. He cringed internally at the words, but he knew that would make Lawrence feel better. And that's what he needed.

"Oh, Marshall." Lawrence embraced him back. He pressed his lips against his temple. "I would never let anyone hurt you. You know that, right? You know how much I love you, don't you?"

He swallowed nervously. "Yeah, I do."

"You're all I have," he murmured. His nails dug into the back of Marshall's neck. "I'm never, ever, going to lose you. You belong here. Right here, in my arms, where you're safe." Lawrence's possessive behavior was no longer scary, it was just plain annoying. It made Marshall's stomach churn. "Where I can protect you. From the bad people out there."

Marshall didn't view Lawrence as a bad person, but misunderstood. He was delusional.

Marshall knew he could be cruel and controlling, but he wasn't some villain from a superhero movie. He was a man with problems and needs, like everyone else.

He didn't believe he had stockholm syndrome... he was just an empathetic person. That's what he kept telling himself.

Lawrence's grip tightened. "You know that, right? And--and if anyone tried to hurt you, I'd kill them. I would. I'd do anything to protect you."

"Yeah, I know. But no one is coming after me, and if they did, then you'd be there to keep me safe." Marshall yawned. He hoped Lawrence would get the hint, and thankfully, he did.

He released Marshall from the crushing hug and sat back again. "Right. I would. Don't forget that. Ever."

[lemoncrushh]

Fratboy Harry - Part 7

Summary: Harry Styles was a boy with a reputation, one that you couldn’t care less about. Yet one night at a frat party changed everything.

Warnings: Smut, drinking, angst, a very cocky Harry. 18+ ONLY!!

Part 7 Word Count: 2323

STORY PAGE

I'm sorry.

I swear, she's not my girlfriend.

If you'd answer my calls I could try to explain.

Will you please talk to me?

These texts and more filled your phone all evening, but you left them unacknowledged. He'd tried calling you several times as well, but you never answered. Finally, as you laid in bed, your mind wandering though you were trying your best to read your English chapter, Harry sent one more text.

Fine. I know you're mad. Maybe you just need some time to cool off. I'll leave you alone. Call me when you wanna talk.

The next morning you managed to make it to class despite a restless night. You'd probably gotten a total of three hours' sleep, and you prayed to God you wouldn't be quizzed on that English chapter because you had no idea what you'd read.

You didn't know why you'd let this boy get to you, but somehow he had. Hell, you didn't even like him at first. Now not only was he invading your mind, but you'd allowed him yourself you get angry and hurt over something that had nothing to do with you. Something that shouldn't have surprised you and you should have seen coming. Dammit.

Coming out of the English building after stopping to talk to your professor, you were zipping up your backpack so you didn't see him at first. Lifting your head, you spotted him on the sidewalk, a small group of people gathered around him. Pulling your backpack over your shoulder, you walked briskly, trying to get past him before he saw you.

"Y/N!" he called.

Shit.

You walked faster, your eyes focused on the sidewalk ahead of you. Hearing puffs of breath as he jogged to catch up you, you rolled your eyes. He called your name again, pleading you to wait. You stopped in your tracks, turning to face him.

"Hey," he said. "Didn't you hear me?"

"I did," you narrowed your eyes.

His shoulders dropped in disappointment. "Why won't you talk to me?"

"I don't feel like talking," you remarked.

"Will you at least hear me out?"

You crossed your arms over your chest. "Fine. I'm listening. But you have about two minutes because I have to get to my next class."

Harry stepped closer to you, lifting his hands like he was about to touch you but changed his mind.

"She's not my girlfriend, okay?"

"You've said that."

"She has a thing for me," he added as though that just cleared everything up.

"Apparently," you raised your brows.

His eyes shifted away from you as he tried to think of the next thing to say. Biting his lip, he looked back at you.

"We slept together once," he muttered. "It meant more to her than it did to me."

You glared at him in disgust. Was this guy for real? If it wasn't for the curiosity taking over, making you want to hear the whole story, you would have stomped off.

"I know that's an awful thing to say," he admitted. "And I don't mean it like it sounds. I wasn't a jerk to her afterwards, I know that's what you're thinking."

"Don't tell me what I'm thinking," you scoffed. "You have no fucking clue what I'm thinking."

"Fine, fine!" he held up his hands. "I'm just trying to explain."

You pursed your lips. "Go on."

Harry sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. "She kept calling me and texting me. She was a sweet girl, so I didn't wanna hurt her. But I could tell she wanted more than I did. She started showing up to all the parties, following me around. Anything I was doing, she'd ask if she could come along. She found out where I lived and somehow got the impression that we were a couple."

You stared at him incredulously as he ran a hand through his hair.

"I still don't really know how it happened. She got it into her head that she's in love with me and that we belong together. I felt bad at first and tried my best to let her down easy. I told her we could be friends."

"Oh yeah, that's what every girl wants to hear," you rolled your eyes.

"I didn't wanna be an asshole!" he exclaimed. "I know you think I'm one, but I'm not."

You opened your mouth to retort but he held up his hand. "I know, don't tell you what you're thinking."

You sighed and uncrossed your arms, gripping your backpack.

"So what, she's stalking you now?" you inquired.

"Sort of, I guess. She won't stop calling or texting me, even after I've had to be harsh with her. She shows up at my door unexpected. After you left yesterday? She came by again. She actually said she forgives me and that we can work it out."

"Eesh," you sounded. You weren't sure who you felt more sorry for, him or her.

"You asked why I don't just block her number. I tried that. That was when she starting coming over. I'm trying to keep tabs just in case I do have to call the police. I'm being a jerk to her now so hopefully she'll listen and finally give up."

You sucked in your lips, allowing his words to sink in. You wanted to believe him. But what if he was just making it up? You stared down at your watch and cleared your throat.

"Your two minutes are up," you muttered.

Harry swallowed. "Listen, you probably don't believe me, but I just wanted to explain."

"Fair enough," you nodded. You gestured toward the sidewalk. "I gotta go."

Turning away, you heard him say your name again. You sighed, looking back at him. He stepped closer to your again, reaching for your hand. You surprised yourself by allowing him to do so, staring down at it as he threaded his fingers through yours.

"You might not believe this either," he murmured. "But I wasn't lying when I said I liked you. And you definitely do something to me."

You blinked, raising your head to look him in the eye. You felt him lean forward and you almost thought he was going to kiss you.

"Really do have to go," you whispered, pulling away from his grip.

You didn't look back as you hurried toward your next class, for which you were certainly already late. Your heart pumped in your chest with anxiety. You heard someone else call his name followed by a hearty group laughter.

You wanted to believe him. You wanted to so badly. But you couldn't get the poor girl's face and sound of her cries out of your head. And as you sat down at your desk, that's when it dawned on you.

That could have easily been you.

Three days later you and Mandy sat at the kitchen table, you with your nose in your Algebra book, Mandy on her laptop. You'd clued her in on everything that had gone down with Harry, though she still wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"You know, there are some crazy stalker girls out there," she commented.

You lifted your head, dropping your pencil. "Are we still talking about this?"

"I'm just saying," she peeked over her computer. "I mean, he is a popular guy. He probably has girls chasing him left and right. She might have gotten caught up in his charm and turned all psycho on him."

"Or maybe he was just giving me a load of crap so I wouldn't think he's a cocky asshole," you stated.

You heard Mandy click her tongue. "I don't think so..." she sang.

You rolled your eyes, resolving to ignore her so you could finish your math homework. The truth was...you didn't know what the truth was. You had so many conflicting thoughts and emotions it was driving you mad. And the fact that Harry hadn't bothered to get in touch with you since you'd run into him on Monday, just added fuel to the fire. Granted, you hadn't called or texted him either. But something told you it wouldn't make any difference. You'd still be just as confused.

When Friday came and went and you still hadn't heard a peep out of Harry, you'd decided you'd given up. You were just some other girl to him, another lay. Whatever, so be it.

You told Mandy you'd go to the party with her Saturday night, but that you weren't going to stay long. If she wanted, she could get a ride home with someone else, or she could call you later when she was ready to leave and you'd come get her.

"But it might be super late," she whined. "You'll be asleep."

"No I won't," you declared. "I haven't slept in days."

As soon as you walked into the house, you knew he was there. You couldn't see him, but you knew. Mandy made a beeline for the kitchen, saying she was ready to get drunk. You followed her until you reached the doorway. You heard someone say his name followed by a cheer. Frozen in your spot, you listened for his accent, but when it didn't come, you changed direction and headed for the nearby beer keg.

A pleasant looking guy in a University t-shirt was standing beside it, pumping for a handful of people. He smiled at you before handing you a red Solo cup.

"Thanks," you grinned before bringing it to your lips. You gazed at him over the rim of the cup as he gave you the once over and then winked.

Mandy nearly scared you when she came around the corner and grabbed your arm.

"He's here," she whispered loudly.

"I know," you remarked.

"He's just with some buddies though," she added. "I don't think that Jamie girl is here."

You shrugged. "So what if she is."

"Have to say..." she paused, bringing her cup to her mouth. "I think it's kinda shitty that he shows up here without calling you first."

"Mandy," you turned to face her, "what did you expect?"

She gave you a look of disappointment and sympathy, her mouth scrunched up to the side of her face.

You stayed for a little over an hour, the one beer the only drink you consumed. You were bored. And trying to avoid running into Harry was not your idea of fun. You found Mandy chatting with the cute keg guy, announcing that you were leaving. She pouted but told you she'd most likely get a ride home.

Just as you were heading for the door, you caught sight of a blonde girl, her eyes wide like she was scanning the room for someone.

Jamie.

Curious, you stood still as you watched her make her way to the kitchen. You followed her, only stopping in the doorway. You saw Harry leaning against the counter, a cup to his mouth. You didn't miss the fact that he raised his eyebrows the second Jamie walked in. But you weren't exactly sure if it was because he was happy to see her, or just an acknowledgement. When she walked up to him, however, you noticed he didn't say a word to her. Instead, he turned to his friend next to him and began chatting.

Okay, so maybe he was ignoring her. But it was also very strange to you that he didn't make any move to tell her to leave him alone. Jamie reached for a cup then, filling it with ice to make her own drink. Then she returned to Harry's side, brushing her fingers up his hand that rested on the counter. He didn't even flinch. Deciding you'd seen enough, you turned on your heels and exited.

That evening you'd just finished brushing your teeth and were getting ready for bed when a new text popped up.

So are you gonna continue to avoid me?

You sighed as you began to text him back. He must have known you were at the party.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about this silent treatment. You can't tell me you're enjoying it.

There you go again, assuming you know what I think.

Then tell me.

Tell you what?

What you think.

You paused for a moment, gathering the words in your head before typing them out.

I think you're an asshole. But not because of the reasons you think I do. I think you're a phony. You want people to like you, but you also want them to fear you. You want them to think you're a cocky asshole but you're really not. I think you slept with some girl who really liked you knowing you didn't really like her, just because it fit your persona. I'm not sure if she's stalking you or what, but I think you get off on it because it makes you look like a big shot.

You saw the three dots indicating Harry was typing, but you were surprised when all he replied was one word.

Wow.

You decided to continue typing, feeling liberated that you were finally getting your feelings out.

To be honest, Harry, I don't know exactly where I fit in to all of this. You say you like me, but I don't know what to believe. Maybe you do, or maybe it's again just something you feel like you have to do because it's who you want people to think you are. Like I'm some conquest or a notch in your belt. You have a reputation to uphold. But I do know one thing. I hardly even know you. And I'm not going to waste my time worrying and wondering about some fratboy who may or may not have some other girl in the wings.

I told you I'm not in a fraternity.

You laughed out loud, but not out of humor. He was unbelievable.

Goodbye, Harry.

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[disposal-blueeee]

VARGASTOBER - day 1 : edgar vargas

[hamartia-grander]

Starting to slowly realise I'm really not doing well mentally and it's. concerning. I feel like I should take a break from tumblr bc it takes some of what little energy I have but it's also my source of joy with friends so idk what to do, like I'd miss y'all more than I'd feel good about being away. But if you notice me talking less/not responding in days it's bc I just cannot. I leave your message notifs up so I don't forget tho <3

[suncaptor]

yeah this cannot go on i need to take something like my chest is exploding i can't calm down it's 7am i feel insane insane insaneeeee