#like how can a movie b 3 hours long and still feel like the storylines needed more time to flesh out?

[elektranxtchiios]

babylon wants to be singing in the rain so bad but it can never be singing in the rain bc singing in the rain is naive and charming and hopeful and completely honest in its charm it really believes what its selling

[jordoalejandro]

The Thirteenth Annual List of Movies I Saw the Past Year

This was one of the better recent years for film, in my humble opinion. A lot of really excellent stuff at the top of my list. On the other hand, the gulf between the good and not so good films feels more vast this year. Not as much depth.

I think I prefer that though. I like a year where I have more A’s and C’s handed out than a year where everything is a B.

This is also my longest list ever so let’s get to it.

Here’s the list of movies I’ve seen since-ish the last Oscars (3/12/23).

77. The Re-Education of Molly Singer - This feels like a throwback to the bad, cheaply made, straight-to-DVD comedies of the 2000s. Poorly written. Jokes that barely register and often don’t really have a punchline. A janky, cliché filled plot. Forced character arcs. Even the editing feels off. This is the kind of movie that should be 90 minutes (or really 80-something) and it ends up two hours long. Fixing the pacing wouldn’t have saved it but it couldn’t have hurt. Really nothing working here at all.

76. Vacation Friends 2 - I didn’t love the first film but I had some positive feelings about it at least. There was simply no reason for a sequel other than grabbing at cash left on the table. The original was about normal people going through some fairly normal circumstances, albeit slightly heightened for comedic effect. There really wasn’t that much more left to organically explore with them. Thus, this sequel did what a lot of unnecessary comedy sequels do when they are desperate for plot and need to introduce some dramatic stakes: add a criminal element. A random drug lord who can have men with guns chase our heroes. It’s so artificial it immediately lays bare how forced this film is. (This film also does another classic bad comedy sequel thing where it brings back a character from the first film in a way that makes zero sense because they wanted to use the actor again. Here, for some reason, one of the couples has hired an employee from the Mexican hotel from the first film as a babysitter for their newborn on their trip to the Caribbean. You know: a thing that happens.) That alone makes you roll your eyes but it’s not a fatal flaw. It’s forgivable if you can still make it funny. The bigger sin this film commits is that it just doesn’t do anything funny. The jokes are almost nonexistent. They’re barely trying and absolutely none of them land. The original had some humor and some heart to at least make it a decent watch. The sequel is drained of all of that. The weird thing is I can’t say I hated anything in particular here. I just felt pretty much nothing at all through the entire runtime, which is arguably worse. Mark Mothersbaugh’s score was nice though.

75. Fool’s Paradise - It’s kind of fascinating how this film misses every major mark. It wants to be a satire about Hollywood but it’s neither sharp nor insightful. It has a storyline about friendship that is supposed to lead to the emotional climax of the film but it doesn’t ever feel earned. The characters never actually feel like friends in any way and there’s no payoff to their relationship. There’s also a little bit of a Charlie Chaplin homage going on but there isn’t really any delight or charm in it. I don’t know what happened here. Everything is off. The worst part is there are almost no laughs in the whole thing. You could get by a little easier if you could at least nail some good jokes or visual gags or something but there are maybe a few chuckles at best. Even with the crazy amount of cameos by funny people. No one can find a laugh. The film looks nice at least.

74. 65 - Ultimately, it’s a bore. It’s a lot of walking through the jungle and occasionally being attacked by dodgy CGI dinosaurs. The action isn’t very compelling. Nor the visuals and music. Nor the story. Really standard lone wolf and cub stuff. Adam Driver tries but he’s given very little to work with. It’s a step above a Syfy channel film – in budget and quality – but not a huge step.

73. Meg 2: The Trench - I started this one up thinking, “Well, I saw the first one, I might as well watch the sequel” and about twenty minutes in, I realized I wasn’t sure if I actually did see the first one. I certainly didn’t write about it. I might have watched it on HBO? Or maybe it’s one of those films you don’t actually need to watch to know exactly how it goes down beat by beat. Speaking of films you don’t actually need to watch to know exactly how they’re going to go beat by beat: Meg 2: The Trench. There are moments in this film where it realizes it’s a stupid movie and leans in and those are the best parts of the film. Page Kennedy is the only person who is at that right level throughout the whole film. Mostly, though, the movie comes off like another bad Syfy channel film, in writing and especially in CGI. It’s one of those films where nothing looks real. Not just the animals and the sets. It’s so overbearing you can’t believe in the props they’re holding. It’s so much that you actually see past the CGI in your mind's eye and see all the blue screens the actors are standing in front of. Not great for the immersion of it all.

72. About My Father - A couple of nice moments (it has a smidge more heart than I thought it would) but it’s not really funny or sharp or surprising in any way. A lot of flat scenes.

71. Ferrari - You see the title and think it’s going to be a story about the car Ferrari, right? At least half about the cars? But no, it’s really like 80% about the man Ferrari. And the man Ferrari? Not that compelling. Lots of family drama. Mostly uninteresting. Some driving, which is done well but not as good as you’ve seen in other movies (including other period piece movies made within the last five years that have Ferrari in the title). It rolls along like that for a while. And then there’s this one scene that occurs near the end that’s completely unhinged (I’m trying to be subtle to avoid any spoilers but anyone who has seen the film knows exactly which scene I’m talking about). Even though this scene is based in truth, it’s not cohesive with what we’ve seen for the previous 100 minutes. It certainly snaps you awake like no other part in the film, so there’s that at least. Then it goes right back to the family stuff and then it ends. I’m sure there’s enough interesting, unique stuff in Ferrari’s life that it could sustain a biopic but what we got was mostly his relationship drama and that’s not particularly captivating. Adam Driver and Penélope Cruz are decent in this but not great in any kind of way that would merit awards or special recognition.

70. Plane - It’s basically exactly what you expect from a 2023 Gerard Butler movie called Plane. It’s a functional action thriller that doesn’t do anything (action, character, dialogue, humor) particularly well but pieces one thing to the next and gets to the finish line.

69. Killers of the Flower Moon - There are a couple of scenes that happen early in the film: Robert De Niro’s character and Leonardo DiCaprio’s character do some scheming, and then some Native Americans are killed. I hope you enjoy these scenes because they will be repeated over and over and over and over again for the next two hours. Does it ever get interesting? No, not really. Because at its core, the film is a murder mystery-type story and we’re witnessing the entire thing from the perspective of the murderers. Are these murderers at least clever or intriguing or sympathetic in any way? No, not really. They’re dullards who get away with things because no one cares that Native Americans are being murdered. ("You're supposed to feel that frustration!" Fine, but I could probably get there in half an hour. You don't need to drag me through mud for two hours.) The final hour of this behemoth is the law and order part of the show, which is so slow it drove me to near rage. I came right up to the edge of literally shouting at the film to move along. It’s a shame that there’s apparently no one left in the entertainment industry who can tell Martin Scorsese to not make three and a half hour movies. This is a film that is technically sound, at least, and that’s why it’s not at the bottom of the list. It looks good, the writing is fine, the acting is fine (the actors don’t really get a ton to do which is weird because there is so much goddamn time to do stuff!). But it’s just so impossibly long that it becomes an endurance test more than anything, and in doing so, destroys any potential chance for me to care about what is happening in the film or to the characters. I think there’s a good story in here, one I might be interested in watching, if it’s told in, let’s say, two-ish hours. Watching this film, I found myself only wanting it to end already.

68. The Flash - Some decent pieces hidden throughout – a few clever bits or jokes, action sequences, and emotional moments – but more stuff that doesn’t work than does. An unsatisfying plot. An overload of terrible CGI to the point where it often looks like you’re watching a PS3 level video game cutscene. Cameos and Easter Eggs that are jammed in so poorly that there’s no joy in them. Mostly though, it’s just an irritating film. The dialogue often tries too hard to force a laugh. A lot of broad, lazy humor. And worst of all, Ezra Miller’s Flash, the center of the film, is flat out annoying. His awkwardness is turned to 11 and he comes off more like a romantic comedy heroine (I’m too clumsy to get my life together!) than a superhero for the first act of the film. Everything gets even worse when the teenage version of the Flash shows up and behaves, for some reason, like an eight year old hopped up on sugar. It’s not just grating, it’s bad for us as an audience to immensely dislike the film’s main character. This is a movie that feels like it was pieced together from too many visions (including producers demanding more cameos because the other studios do it) and ultimately, it’s a big mess.

67. The Machine - There’s at least some plot though it’s not particularly strong. It works well enough to keep the movie moving along. Serviceable action. The big issue is there are only a couple of genuine laughs and that’s all you’re really looking for here so to be so lacking in that department is a huge issue for the film. An okay plot and serviceable action is not enough to get by. It’s supposed to be really funny and it just isn’t.

66. Good Grief - It has its moments of humor or dialogue but just doesn’t get there for the most part. I think the writing was lacking. Not enough humor, drama isn’t gripping, emotion isn’t there. This plot was fertile ground for a good dramedy but it simply does not capitalize.

65. Polite Society - This is a movie that should be fun and breezy but it’s unfortunately very bad at maintaining any kind of momentum. The final act in particular drags horribly, gaining steam and losing it almost immediately several times, making a 1:40 movie seem much, much longer. A few good moments scattered throughout and definitely some style to it, but overall the humor and action are nowhere near the quality they should be for this to work.

64. Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire - Really generic sci-fi. You’ve got your farmer type rebels and your fascist military army and your laser rifles and CGI aliens and the one hero who can save the universe, but she’s got to pull together her ragtag group to do it. Fine. I can forgive generic if it’s executed well but this is all pretty dull. The characters aren’t interesting, heroes and villains alike. Nor the dialogue. The plot is a standard "get the team together" plot but the heroes just go place to place and have people join them without having to actually do much. Mostly they show up, watch a new character do some sci-fi business, and then that character goes “Okay, let’s go.” Even the action isn’t very good, which is generally Zack Snyder’s strength. The film is interesting to look at, at least, so he hasn’t lost that from his arsenal. But this is supposed to be the jumping off point for a new Star Wars type universe thing and I just don’t see it. I don’t care about any of the goings-on with these characters or this world. There’s nothing here that makes me even the slightest bit enthusiastic for like a dozen movies and spinoff TV shows and video games or whatever.

63. Priscilla - This is the newest addition to the “various scenes from a sad famous woman’s life” collection. It has a little bit more life to it than that but not much. Technically solid. Good looking, good music, fine acting performances. But this feels like a movie made as a direct response to Elvis because his relationship with Priscilla was a bit creepy and, in theory, it does deserve further inspection. The problem is, in practice, when you’re actually watching a two hour film about it and you’re like, no, I guess I really don’t care about any of this. For what it’s worth, the actual Priscilla (an executive producer on this project herself) doesn’t seem to fall on one side of the debate or the other too strongly. The film seems to be sending the message that there was good and bad, that the fame and drugs certainly made things worse and ruined their marriage but, well, the whole thing also ends with “I Will Always Love You” playing so… it’s complicated, I guess? I appreciate it exploring the issue as gray but then that really highlights the “who cares?” of it all. I can’t shake the feeling this was a whole film dedicated to telling me a relationship with Elvis that started when you were a child is kind of weird. Okay. Got it. Thanks.

62. You Hurt My Feelings - Too many scenes that don’t really go anywhere and too many exchanges with no punchlines. It makes it feel like the film is stretching to make its 90 minutes. There are some interesting ideas and some funny bits in here but simply not enough in terms of character or dialogue or plot.

61. A Good Person - It never reaches a level of emotion or poignancy to truly be worth the journey, especially because the journey, at its core, is a generic addiction story (read: a melodramatic, repetitive cycle of relapse and recovery). Florence Pugh is good as always and Morgan Freeman does nice work, but the film as a whole just never gets there.

60. Chicken Run: Dawn of the Nugget - I don’t really remember the first one. I saw it in theaters as a child and have generally positive feelings about it but that was also two-plus decades ago so I can’t say with any certainty if I liked it or if I just liked being unburdened by age. Anyway, though this sequel is fine, it doesn’t seem to me as good, in writing and style, as the original. (Or maybe it is. Again, I can barely remember.) This is a fine movie for children and I’m sure children would enjoy it. It’s not really anything that appeals to me.

59. Shazam! Fury of the Gods - A couple of funny bits (Djimon Hounsou actually gets most of the better laughs, stealing the few scenes he’s in) and serviceable though not exactly enthralling action, but it still mostly feels like an uninspired sequel. Middling villains and a plot it’s hard to connect with. A lot of murder of innocent people that doesn’t mesh with the otherwise more lighthearted tone. Two movies in and they still haven’t figured out how to make the adult and kid versions of Shazam seem like the same character. It’s a little closer in this one than in the first but adult Shazam acts like an eight year old and kid Shazam (who is 17 years old, not eight) is more serious. You feel like they’re two entities and not the same person. If I had to point the finger, I’d say it’s probably Zachary Levi’s fault. Maybe adult Shazam’s lines might match better with different readings but he plays it very much like a small child and it’s off. The director should probably be on top of this, too. All of this sounds more negative than it is. It’s mostly forgettable fluff but it’s easy enough to watch and not hate. It’s just that it’s also not going to interest anyone outside of fans of the first film.

58. Down Low - Some decent laughs but about as many misses as well. Not funny enough for what flows, plotwise, as a sort of standard dark comedy.

57. The Creator - A good looking film, in cinematography and production design. Slick. But it just could not get me to care about the characters or story. Another sci-fi flick that falls right into your typical lone wolf and cub story. It tries to provide a few cute moments to get you to buy into their relationship but mostly hopes you’ll just accept it because our main character is protecting a “child.” While that is usually enough to go on in most of these types of stories, the child here isn’t really a child. It’s a stand-in for something much more gray. The film hopes you won’t examine that gray area very much if the child says something sweet every now and then. I could maybe get there if the whole thing was executed better but our main character is only sometimes compelling and his relationship with the cub feels more obligatory than earned so I spent the last half of the movie not particularly caring if they succeed or not.

56. Nyad - There’s some of the decent stuff you expect in a story about battling nature (and yourself) to do something incredible. And the relationship between the two leads is strong (so is their acting). But the movie itself isn’t incredibly interesting as a whole. Mostly because it’s a lot of swimming, then getting hurt while swimming, then resetting, then more swimming. And repeat. Nyad goes through a The Revenant-esque series of ass kickings to the point it becomes almost humorous. Also, and this is probably mostly a personal thing, but I don’t really care about feats like this, swimming long distances and such. Of course, there are plenty of films that are about things I don’t care about and I was made to care about them by the film. Nyad never really did enough to get me to buy into why I should care whether or not she can do it. In fact, they often make her such a miserable, unlikeable character that I sometimes found myself rooting for the ocean. The problem is, if you’re not bought in to the glory of the achievement, then you’re really just watching swimming.

55. The Color Purple - I haven’t seen the original but I had a general idea of what it’s about and I sort of formed a version of the film in my head and now, having seen this version, I think I was pretty close. Lots of melodrama about being a woman and Black and poor in the South in the past. It’s not fun! This version has music, at least. A lot of enjoyable songs. Great performances (in singing and choreography). They’re the high points of the film by far and keep things lively. Honestly, another song was something to look forward to when you’re caught in the trauma and sadness parts. It’s a visually strong film as well. Good acting, with Taraji P. Henson, Fantasia Barrino, and especially Danielle Brooks doing strong work. All that said, I write a lot of these reviews and get to the end and say something like “this is coming off more negative than how I actually feel about the film.” This is sort of the opposite. All of this sounds more positive than how I felt about the film. Despite my enjoyment of the musical bits and appreciation of the acting, the film is a lot of dull melodrama. Maybe primarily that. That’s why it’s around here on the list.

54. The Super Mario Bros. Movie - I enjoyed the incorporation of musical themes from the game and some of the Easter Eggs. It’s a pleasant looking film. Colorful but not overwhelming. Is this just stuff I like about the games, though? Maybe there’s credit, at least, in the movie knowing what to pull from the games. Jack Black was good as Bowser. I’m just listing things now. It’s very much a decent kid’s movie: pretty straightforward story, basic jokes. That’s fine. It’s good to have movies for kids that aren’t torturous, but I don’t have kids so I don’t get a ton out of this.

53. Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom - It’s mostly a mess. Most of it is CGI’d to hell, so much so that you start to question whether Jason Momoa is even real. The action scenes aren’t very interesting and neither is the plot. There’s a lot of flat acting in it, too. It’s not what you would call a good film. But you know what? There’s actually a decent amount of enjoyable stuff in here. Some funny lines and gags (though many that do not work). And much of the second act has Momoa reuniting with Patrick Wilson’s villain/brother character from the first film and they have a little buddy comedy thing going that works surprisingly well. Their chemistry is good. Momoa himself is very charismatic. He’s trying. He just has very little to work with. The fun stuff in the film is simply not enough to save it but it at least prevents it from being a train wreck and makes it not a miserable watch.

52. The Caine Mutiny Court-Martial - Well directed, well written (it’s based on a 1950s play which is based on a 1950s novel so it’s mostly adapted but it’s been modernized well), well acted. William Friedkin was a masterful director, and he’s able to mostly keep the film moving and the energy up. Ultimately, though, it does end up feeling like the straight up play adaptation that it is. 95% of the film takes place in one room and it’s essentially a dialogue-only film, and there’s only so much you can do to prevent it from slowing down, even as an expert director.

51. Past Lives - There’s some strong acting and good writing in parts. Moments of brilliance (mostly in the last half hour) but I need more overall. Humor, drama. Something. I’ll settle for more dialogue. It’s a movie with a lot of walking and sightseeing. Very long takes with very few lines. I appreciate letting a moment breathe but, well, let me put it like this: it's a 105 minute movie and I looked up the screenplay and it’s 85 pages long and the dialogue within is written twice, one in Korean and once in English. That’s not an equation that adds up to a fast (or really even medium) paced film.

50. Gran Turismo - Decently directed. The action scenes are well shot and have good energy. David Harbour is very good, turning what might be a cliché curmudgeonly mentor character into a charming curmudgeonly mentor character. He takes really basic lines and imbues them with some life. That’s sort of the problem with the whole script, though. It’s very basic in both plot and dialogue. (There are tons of lines that are just describing what’s happening. “Gotta catch this guy!” “Make the turn!” It’s not the worst thing but once you catch it, you don’t stop hearing it.) There are parts of this film that rise above its base level of basic-ness, but not too many.

49. Dumb Money - Credit to the filmmakers for taking a story that doesn’t really lend itself to a plot nor have any real heroes and crafting a watchable film out of it. It’s entertaining enough and has a few laughs. The second act is very repetitive as they run through the hold or sell question like half a dozen times. I don’t know if this is valid as film criticism because it’s based on me knowing a lot about this story in real life but I found myself rolling my eyes at much of the film and its attempts to oversimplify and create heroes. That’s the issue with telling a story that just happened. The full fallout of the story hasn’t occurred yet. Some of the things in the film have already aged poorly. There’s a title card at the end saying what happened to some of the characters and one says a character was still holding GameStop stock waiting to sell. The stock is like 80% lower now than it was at the peak this film presents. She’s screwed. She’s not a real person, but she does represent a lot of real people who did get caught up in the excitement of this thing and got left holding the bag when it stopped working. Again, I debate with myself if that’s a legit way to criticize a film, so I’ll put that aside and just settle on this being fine.

48. No Hard Feelings - The story, the characters, the comedy: certainly could’ve been better but still passable. They all come together to make a solid enough film with a few laughs but nothing extraordinary.

47. Strays - It has some laugh out loud moments but most of the humor is more “hah.” than actually funny. That’s a problem for a film like this which is really about the jokes more than anything. There is some heart to the film but I don’t know if it’s a strength of the writing so much as an exploitation of our feelings about dogs. That is, show us a dog being sad, then being happy, and their faces and our brains do most of the work. It’s a nice effort to try and create some depth in a film that’s mostly about dogs cussing and humping things, at least.

46. Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game - Cute and cleverly told. It has some good moments and a likability to it but not enough drama to really carry it over even its 90 minute runtime. It basically tries to get by on being cute and cleverly told and that can only get you so far. It’s solid if not spectacular.

45. Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania - Just okay. It just doesn’t have the life the first two films in this series had. It misses the groundedness of those films and those side characters. A lot of time here is spent setting up the Quantum Realm and its factions and showing it all off but it’s hard to really care about all these new characters or this world which reads like a generic alien world and never feels more than a giant load of CGI. A lot could probably be forgiven if it was funnier but while it has moments of humor and creativity, it goes too long in between to forgive its weakness in other areas.

44. Rustin - A decent, if straightforward, civil rights biopic. A very strong performance from Colman Domingo at the center. Not a lot of surprises but it moves well enough for a biopic.

43. Champions - It’s a film about a curmudgeonly, washed up basketball coach who has to coach a team of young adults with learning disabilities. If you hear that premise and immediately build the film in your head, you’re probably at least 80% right. It’s done well, though. It has some heart and a few good laughs and moves well enough. I would’ve liked it more if it was funnier or tapped into something more emotional, but as is it’s decent enough.

42. Lift - It’s a sleek heist film with a decent score and it moves well which makes it quite watchable even if it’s not exactly a great film. It’s very clunky. The writing isn’t fun enough. Only really Billy Magnussen and Vincent D’Onofrio are given characters with some personality. They aren’t written particularly well but the actors make them work by leaning in. The rest of the team doesn’t offer a whole lot. Kevin Hart seems miscast. He’s playing a veteran criminal (think George Clooney in the Oceans movies) but he doesn’t fit the role well and he’s given almost nothing funny to do. More action than anything, which is not his wheelhouse. The main heist isn’t plotted particularly sharply. It sidelines most of the team at the halfway point so Hart and Gugu Mbatha-Raw can have an action romance style third act. Again, it’s not great. More than a handful of weird choices. But it didn’t exactly stop me from enjoying the ride, so I can’t really ding it too badly I guess.

41. Bank of Dave - Cute, sweet, kind of simple. Nothing too surprising. Could be funnier. Based off a true-ish story (as it says) and a lot of it feels movie-fied (some parts egregiously so) but it still mostly works and you can watch it and feel good.

40. Blue Beetle - It’s a DC origin film that’s about on par with the first Shazam. It shares some of the highlights and issues with Shazam, as well. Highlights: some good humor, fun character interactions between the heroes and the side characters. Issues: action is just okay, some darker tone shifts that don’t jibe with the lightheartedness in most of the rest of the film. The villain in this film was much weaker than Shazam but the soundtrack was much better and more memorable. Xolo Maridueña is a more charismatic lead, too. So, some give and take but I’d rate them around the same quality level.

39. Linoleum - Some interesting stuff for the first 80% of the film but a bit slow. An excellent finale, though, that sort of saves everything. In that sense, it’s sort of the opposite of a film like Don’t Worry Darling, proving a good ending can really make or break you. Linoleum’s strong, moody, emotional finish ties everything together and sheds light on what we’ve seen and makes the whole thing feel worthwhile.

Are you still with me? We’re about halfway there. Grab a snack. Let’s do a quick mid-list documentary break.

Still: A Michael J. Fox Movie is a creatively edited, sometimes difficult to watch film about the actor’s life with some strong emotional moments throughout. Parkinson’s is a hell of a disease.

The Eternal Memory is another touching, heart-wrenching film. Also not an easy watch but it finds a way to inject love and beauty into something quite bleak. Alzheimer’s is a hell of a disease.

Okay, let’s get to the top half of the list, which is longer than some previous whole lists. Why did I do this to myself?

38. Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. - A cute and snappy coming of age story. Doesn’t talk down and doesn’t get too melodramatic. Some sweet moments, some funny moments. I would imagine it probably hits harder for women but I can appreciate the quality of the work.

37. The Killer - Very stylish, as David Fincher does. It moves well. Michael Fassbender is very good in the role. Tilda Swinton has a good bit role, too. It’s fun as a sort of neo-noir experience but as a story it’s not incredibly fulfilling. The setup is fun (the opening sequence which gets you right inside the killer’s mind is the high point of the film), then you get the inciting incident, and then four revenge chapters which are different enough from one another to stay fresh but not entirely compelling overall in a storytelling way. It’s similar to John Wick in that sense, though it’s a bit more artistic and less action-y than that.

36. The Marvels - Funny. Good characters. Iman Vellani, who was strong as the lead in her MCU show, does an excellent job here, able to still stand out even amongst bigger acting names. There’s a power swap thing between the three leads that is inventive and creates for some very fun action scenes. The villain is entirely forgettable, though, and the story isn’t really there either. Plus, the film is structured in a weird way. It sort of skips a first act and jumps right into act two, which makes it feel a little bit unsatisfying. Not necessarily unsatisfying as in letting the viewer down, but unsatisfying in a way that makes you feel as if you’ve just watched an episodic adventure rather than a full satisfying film story.

35. Extraction 2 - A strong follow up that shares the same strengths and weaknesses from the first. Action is really well done. There’s a 20+ minute one-shot early in the film that’s so impressive and long it almost feels arrogant. Like, it just keeps going to the point where you start thinking enough already. It also kind of makes every action piece that follows feel like a let down. Chris Hemsworth is good in the role again. The weakness, like the first, is in the story. It’s mostly there just to give reason for our heroes to run around and kill bad guys.

34. Tetris - Presented in a really clever way. It moves well. It’s movie-fied for sure and you can absolutely feel it, but it’s in service of making what’s likely a pretty dry story into something more thrilling and effective.

33. Nimona - Great looking animation. A good story. Funny. Solid voice acting. It’s mostly for children but an adult can watch it, too, and appreciate some of the jokes and not be miserable.

32. Leo - Not every bit lands but there are some very good ones that produce genuine laughs. It has some heart and sweetness to it, too. Adam Sandler does solid voice work. A lot of songs, some good, some weak. Like Nimona, a cute film for kids that parents can watch and get something out of as well.

31. May December - A fascinatingly dark film with notes of sharp satire. It’s not the most thrilling film but it keeps you engaged. Well written and directed. Well acted. Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore are good, of course, but Charles Melton is excellent as well.

30. Elemental - A well done, insightful story about immigrants. The romance story was fine but didn’t really hook me. I enjoyed the film as a whole but it just didn’t hit me in the emotions like so many Pixar films do. A good film but not one of their best.

29. John Wick: Chapter 4 - A little too long to the point where even the action scenes, which are the main attraction, start to overstay their welcome. You start to go “Okay I get it, let’s move on.” Still, the action is very well done. Fun locales. A good looking film. Even a few bits of well-employed humor. I think it’s my favorite since the first one and perhaps the best one of the series but I also say that knowing that this series is very much four movies that are fun while you’re in the ride but leave your memory almost immediately after. They are what they are.

28. Maestro - Really impressive acting from Bradley Cooper and especially Carey Mulligan. Strong directing and visuals. It’s almost told in vignettes, which makes it kind of dreamlike. Some of the vignettes really work but a lot hit your sort of standard biopic pieces and don’t do as much. Overall, it’s solid.

27. Somewhere in Queens - Decent writing, decent acting, with Laurie Metcalf giving a nice performance. Complex, nuanced characters. It’s a good family dramedy with a little bit of humor and emotion.

26. Saltburn - It’s delightfully dark and keeps you interested, even if it sort of reaches an ending that, while not bad, doesn’t land with the sort of punch you want it to. There’s something missing in character motivation and plotting that makes it feel like it’s missed the mark. Still some fun performances (especially Barry Keoghan and Rosamund Pike) and excellent cinematography and design. It works as is. It just feels like there was potential for this to be more and it didn’t get there.

25. Bottoms - Very funny, very silly. I think my main problem is that it’s such a hyper-heightened reality the film takes place in that when it comes back down to Earth and tries to have some human drama it makes me roll my eyes. Having football players kept in a cage in history class and also a sincere best friends argument feels like trying to have your cake and eat it, too. Still very fun though when it sticks to the over the top satire, which is the majority of the film.

24. Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny - I think part of the problem is the original three were so good and ended so perfectly, it’s really hard to find a story to make further adventures worthwhile. This one is fine, but it just doesn’t get all the way there. It doesn’t quite measure up, in basically every sense. The action, the humor – they’re there but just not totally up to par. The other thing that is a little off is that this feels very much like a modern action movie, like someone doing Indiana Jones years later. There was a pulpiness to the original three that made them feel less plastic and that’s missing here. Even with its faults, I still think this is a good film. John Williams’ music is still great and Harrison Ford still has the charisma, and there are moments where you feel the magic again. Just not enough to string together a fully great film. It leaves a better taste in my mouth than Crystal Skull, at least, even if it can’t live up to the original trilogy. Maybe it never had a chance.

23. Theater Camp - Very cute, often funny. It pokes fun at theater kids and actors but in a loving way. A sweet movie that’s an easy watch.

22. Quiz Lady - A very endearing film. Sweet, silly, funny. A little bit of heart, too. There’s certainly room for it to be funnier or more original but it works and has some good bits and fun performances.

21. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves - Lots of fun. It has solid action pieces and good humor. Importantly, it finds ways to do fresh things with a sort of standard fantasy story and keeps it entertaining throughout. The writer/director team of Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daley did this with their last film, Game Night, too. Take a premise that could be kind of bleh and get creative. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel, just write a sharp, funny script.

20. Red, White & Royal Blue - This is my token “sweet gay romcom that I have a tough time being objective about” pick. I get one of these every few years or so. It’s a very cute film with some decent humor and good flow. Sort of your standard romcom fare but it’s executed well. Should it be this high on the list, quality-wise? No, probably not. It’s not that much worse, but it’s, objectively, not that great either. I enjoyed it enough, however, to bump it up here. And it is my list after all.

19. Wonka - Like Paul King’s Paddington films, this is much better than you expect it would be or than it really needs to be. Also, like the Paddington films, this is still mostly a movie for kids so it’s only going to go so far for me. But it’s quite a delightful film. Some clever lines and gags. Good songs, though nothing iconic that will stick long term. I have to stop doubting Timothée Chalamet. When I first heard of this, I thought it was going to be a mistake, but he’s so damn charming that he’s able to pull it off. He dives headfirst into this role and gives it his all and it pays off.

18. You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah - It’s similar in theme to Are You There God? but mixed a little with Mean Girls and flavored incredibly Jewishly. I found it to be a sharper, funnier, and more modern approach to those themes. The nepotism of it all is a little gross (it’s crazy that Adam Sandler’s immediate family all won major roles in this film he produced after what I’m sure was a thorough audition process) but Sunny Sandler is, in fact, quite good in the role so you can forgive it.

17. Anatomy of a Fall - Smartly written, well acted. Sandra Hüller gives a strong, subtle performance at the center of the film and Milo Machado-Graner is great in a supporting role. The film does feel a little bit like an intense, fleshed out episode Law and Order though. There’s an hour of courtroom drama in the middle that’s engaging but also mostly dialogue on dialogue. It’s similar to The Caine Mutiny Court-Martial in that there’s only so much you can do to dress that up. It’s a film that doesn’t spoon-feed you, which I appreciate. It’s confident in its ambiguity and it lets you decide where you fall, pun absolutely not intended.

16. Air - Sharp writing, moves well, good acting. Matt Damon and Viola Davis are especially strong. (Damon delivers a speech near the end of the film that is particularly affecting.) Nothing groundbreaking. Just a really well done sports/business story.

15. Next Goal Wins - Sweet, funny, and some heart as well. The story has some clunkiness and there are definitely some misses amongst the many jokes in the film, but a lot more that works than doesn’t. Michael Fassbender is very good and Oscar Kightley is excellent as the surprising heart of the film. It gives you everything you want from a feel good sports film.

14. Oppenheimer - Some great stuff but also simply too long. The film is paced well enough for a three hour film but it likely didn’t need to be three hours. The most compelling stuff, as you might imagine, is the creation and moral implications of building a world destroying bomb. Interpersonal affairs, while interesting enough still, are much less so. Good acting from Cillian Murphy and Robert Downey Jr., who really are the only ones to get enough screen time in this giant cast to truly make their mark. (I would argue though, if you wanted to trim an hour from this film, you could probably pare down Downey’s role almost entirely.) Good directing and writing, taking what might be very dry material and keeping it enthralling.

13. Barbie - I really like how many wild swings this film took for being a big budget film based on a worldwide property. Interesting characters. Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling do great work in their roles. Sharp writing. More than a few laugh out loud jokes and gags (though also a handful that fall flat). It does veer into too silly territory at some points and drags a little here and there but is able to recover, usually by taking a sharp left turn you don’t expect. Its messages are laid on thick but it’s playing to a certain younger audience so I’ll roll with it. A couple of nice humanist moments as well (which is something Greta Gerwig excels at including in her films) though nothing in the film that really cut through me emotionally.

12. Blackberry - A fairly straightforward rise and fall story of a tech company but particularly well done. Fun, smart, doesn’t drag. Good music, good style. Glenn Howerton in his wheelhouse as a barely restrained maniac and gives an excellent, memorable performance.

11. Rye Lane -  Smart, sharp writing. Strong performances from the two leads, David Jonsson and Vivian Oparah, who have great chemistry. Fun direction and editing. It rolls right along for about 75 minutes, tells its story, and then ends. This is another film where it’s like: is this, at its core, just a very cute rom com? Yes. But while it’s not reinventing the genre it is a great execution of it.

10. All of Us Strangers - A truly beautiful, haunting film about love and loss and the things we wish we could say. It’s very artsy so it certainly has its slow points where moments just breathe and breathe, but its high points are so damn high. It’s like an emotional assassin. Several scenes, especially in the back half, that just nail you right in the heart. It’s basically a four actor film - Andrew Scott, Paul Mescal, Jamie Bell, and Claire Foy - and each of them puts in just tremendous work, all worthy of being on my top five individual performances list.

9. Society of the Snow - “Alive - Now with real Latinos!” It’s a pretty straightforward survival film about a story that you’ve likely heard of and so there aren’t really a ton of surprises but it’s expertly made. Shot well, acted well. Tense and thrilling. Aided by a beautiful score from Michael Giacchino. It’s a brutal story but one that’s also about sacrifice and strength and hope. It’s a simple theme but it lands well, puns still completely unintended.

8. Poor Things - Absolutely fascinating from a visual and musical standpoint, as Yorgos Lanthimos does. His directing is truly excellent and matches great with Tony McNamara’s sharp writing. The film is just a bit too long. You can feel it gaining and losing momentum in the back half. Mark Ruffalo’s scenes are definitely the best in the movie and the others, while generally good, are just not as strong (with Willem Dafoe’s scenes being the strongest of the rest). Excellent acting performances from Ruffalo and Dafoe and especially Emma Stone at the center of this wild ride.

7. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse - A fantastic sequel, on par with the first. Smart, funny, emotional writing, good voice acting. The visuals are excellent but often have so much happening on screen you can’t focus and have to just kind of glaze over and let it go. It’s fine – you never really feel lost – but it’s also kind of sad because there are interesting details happening that you almost literally can’t catch without stopping the movie. I was really loving this film until the final minutes. Without giving too much away, I’ll just note it basically concludes on a “to be continued…” note, stopping at what feels like the mid-point of the third act. It’s an ending that doesn’t not work but movies that end like that leave a bad taste in my mouth. Set up threads for the next film, sure, but don’t leave me hanging completely. Don’t make me leave your film with a groan. The ending was obviously not enough to make me hate the film, hence why it’s way up here on the list, but it would’ve been higher with a more complete one.

6. Leave the World Behind - A fascinating neo-paranoia thriller that’s masquerading as an apocalypse film, which is very meta in itself. It has a lot of interesting things to say about us as a society, which risks it getting preachy, but it walks the line by telling the story in a really engaging way and never sacrificing plot for message. Good acting, smart writing, and interesting directing. It doesn’t force you to a conclusion but presents you with some ideas and lets you decide.

5. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 - A little overstuffed but other than that a really wonderful end to this trilogy. James Gunn brings the humor, the music, the emotional beats, the action. He writes these characters and their interactions so well. I don’t know how or if this series will continue, but whoever takes it over will have a tremendous challenge trying to match Gunn. It would have been a travesty to have not let him come back and close out this chapter for these characters, and I’m so glad they got one last ride under his direction.

4. Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One - It feels like there should be another dash or colon or something between Dead Reckoning and Part One, right? But that’s how they list it. I think they got self-conscious about already having too many punctuation marks in the title. One more would look ridiculous. The night after we watched this film the first time, we were going to watch another film that we’d been putting off (it appears on this list, much lower) and all I could think while navigating towards the other film was how much I just wanted to watch Dead Reckoning again instead. That’s the kind of film this is. It energizes you. It makes you want to come back for more. The action sequences are fantastic, as always. The humor is there. The visuals. The music. The franchise has had issues with villains (generally its weak point) and making the main villain of this arc a nebulous computer program isn’t really helping to remedy that. (Esai Morales is fine but unremarkable as the human face of that program.) The decision to make the villain an AI that can manipulate essentially anything adds a really nice dose of paranoia to all the proceedings but also requires a lot more heavy exposition and makes the film much more heady. Making you think a little more isn’t necessarily a bad thing for a film, but is it the right choice for a Mission: Impossible film? I’m not sure. It’s maybe better for these films to just have a MacGuffin and keep things moving. Still, this film’s nearly three hours fly by and despite it being a “part one,” it tells a full enough story to be satisfying.

3. Asteroid City - The music, production design, and cinematography are excellent as always with Wes Anderson. Strong acting from the whole ensemble in small pieces and a surprisingly strong performance by Jason Schwartzman at the center. Smart writing as well. Fast and very funny, and then movingly poignant. It’s a little inaccessible in parts. The plot is purposefully all over the place and it can make it quite difficult to parse exactly what’s going on at first glance, but I think the greater message still comes through and in a deeply emotional way, in my view at least. It really worked for me.

2. American Fiction - Tremendous writing. A strong, smart, very funny satire about media mixed with a moving family dramedy. Great acting performances all around but especially Jeffrey Wright, who is excellent as the film’s anchor, and Sterling K. Brown, who delivers a very strong supporting performance, embodying a character who’s both funny and deeply pained. Everything about this movie works.

1. The Holdovers - I guess the theme of this year’s list is “brilliant execution.” No other film for me embodies that theme this year more than The Holdovers. Yes, the film is your sort of standard “curmudgeon bonds with young person who melts his heart” tale but it is executed flawlessly. It finds the right tone immediately and never lets it slip. A pitch perfect mix of humor and drama. Heart and sorrow. Very human. Sharp writing. Brilliant acting all around. Paul Giamatti is fantastic. The too smart for his own good sad sack who is actually a human being underneath the layers of protection he puts between himself and other people. Da’Vine Joy Randolph, who, if this blog’s search function worked, you could find me singing the praises of for years, once again turns in an excellent performance. I’m so glad she’s getting big-time recognition. Dominic Sessa is great, as well, and it’s very impressive that he’s going toe to toe with these other two established actors and sticking right with them. The core three characters’ stories unfold so beautifully throughout the film, getting you to empathize with them slowly and naturally. It’s filled with great music and great visuals. You feel yourself in New England in the 1970s. I think the thing I can say most in favor of this film is that I just didn’t want it to end. It’s such a warm, wonderful story that I was actually disappointed when I felt it turning from act two to act three and starting to wrap up. In a year where I’ve complained over and over that a lot of these films are too long, this was the one film I could’ve spent much, much more time in.

Time to do some individual awards.

Best Actor

5. Jason Schwartzman, Asteroid City 4. Barry Keoghan, Saltburn 3. Andrew Scott, All of Us Strangers 2. Jeffrey Wright, American Fiction 1. Paul Giamatti, The Holdovers

Best Actress

5. Sandra Hüller, Anatomy of a Fall 4. Natalie Portman, May December 3. Margot Robbie, Barbie 2. Carey Mulligan, Maestro 1. Emma Stone, Poor Things

Best Supporting Actor

5. Paul Mescal, All of Us Strangers 4. Willem Dafoe, Poor Things 3. Glenn Howerton, Blackberry 2. Sterling K. Brown, American Fiction 1. Mark Ruffalo, Poor Things

Best Supporting Actress

5. Julianne Moore, May December 4. Rosamund Pike, Saltburn 3. Claire Foy, All of Us Strangers 2. Danielle Brooks, The Color Purple 1. Da’Vine Joy Randolph, The Holdovers

Best Directing

5. Emerald Fennell, Saltburn 4. J. A. Bayona, Society of the Snow 3. Yorgos Lanthimos, Poor Things 2. Wes Anderson, Asteroid City 1. Alexander Payne, The Holdovers

Best Writing

5. Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach, Barbie 4. Tony McNamara, Poor Things 3. Wes Anderson, Asteroid City 2. David Hemingson, The Holdovers 1. Cord Jefferson, American Fiction

And now let’s look at the ACTORS WEB:

What a nightmare! Here’s a fun fact about the making of this graphic: I almost cried and gave up on it four or five times! I saw too many movies with too many big casts this year. A terrible mistake on my part.

Okay, that’s more than enough for this post. It’s over. We made it.

Enjoy the Oscars.

- - - - -

Read More:

Annual Lists of Movies I Saw the Past Year

[salvatoreschool]

Kaylee Bryant On "Legacies," The Importance Of Queer Rep On TV, Hosie, And More

"I have so many people constantly telling me that watching Josie on the show has made them feel more comfortable in themselves."

This week, Kaylee Bryant squeezed us into her schedule to talk about their role as Josie Saltzman on Legacies. As a huge Josie fan, I couldn't think of a better way to spend a morning than talking to Kaylee about The Vampire Diaries, Hosie, our favorite books, and more! Here's everything we talked about:

1. What was your audition for Legacies like?

My audition process was very interesting because they kept a lot of it a secret. I had no script and a fake character name. And then I had my second audition, a chemistry read, which Jenny Boyd [Lizzie] wasn't even at. I walked in and immediately just flat-out asked, "This is for the twins, right?" So it was long, but short and intense at the same time.

BuzzFeed: Wait, did you know which twin you were going to be playing?

I initially auditioned for Josie, and then during chemistry reads, they started asking me to read for Lizzie. And then we had our final callback where I finally met Jenny and we both read for both roles. They never told us [who was playing who] until Jenny had her appointment to go dye her hair blonde.

2. What's a typical day on set like?

Gosh, it changes every time. If it's a busy day on set, we're talking like 8 a.m. call time where we spend about two hours on hair and makeup and go straight into rehearsals. If it's a big sort of episode that involves stunt work and wire work, you're talking about doing maybe two scenes in a day. But if it's an average day, we can do anywhere from three to five scenes and we can start at 8 a.m. and wrap at 8 p.m. It really depends. I'm surprised if I'm not surprised.

3. You’ve said you’re a huge fan of The Vampire Diaries. Josie played Elena in the musical episode — what was that like?

It was surreal for sure. They had talked a little bit about doing a musical episode since Season 1. And I always thought that they were joking when they talked about doing Salvatore: The Musical!, so when they said Josie would obviously play Elena, I was like, "Hahaha." And then I got the script and realized I actually was playing Elena. The musical aspect of it was the easy part. The difficult part was, I think, getting into the iconic Elena attire and trying to feel normal. Because we have a lot of crew members that worked on The Vampire Diaries, and they kept coming up to me being like, "This is weird. I feel weird."

4. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve filmed with Courtney Bandeko (Finch) this season?

I really did love the scene that we had in the town square [when] we got on a moped. There were so many fans in the town square that were huddled in the rain — it was pouring rain, freezing cold — trying to snap photos of us. And it was kind of one of those surreal moments where it felt full circle, that I was on a Vampire Diaries spinoff in town square. It was a lot going on, but it was a lot of fun. It's always fun working with Courtney.

5. You and Danielle Rose Russell (Hope) also have amazing chemistry — what’s your favorite scene you’ve filmed together?

Oh gosh, we have a lot that are pretty amazing. Honestly, I'd say [Season 3] Episode 14 — we finally got to do a lot more scenes together. And it's always fun, especially when it's Josie, Lizzie, and Hope, because we have so much history character-wise. Any time you really get to dive into that, we love it.

6. I know Josie and Finch are working through some things right now, but I gotta ask — how do you feel about Hosie?

I love it. Danielle and I loved the idea of Hosie starting from Season 1, and we kept asking and asking and asking for it. So it's kind of funny and full circle that now the fans have kind of taken our side with things, and now they won't stop asking for it. All we want is this beautiful, dynamic relationship. And I think that the fans want that as well.

BuzzFeed: Yeah, I mean, people have even been asking me about Hosie, and I don't work on the show!

Oh, I'm sure! [Laughs] Obviously I love it, though.

7. Is there a particular Josie moment you’re really proud of?

Josie has a scene coming up in Episode 18 — or 19? — I don't know, but it's good. It's sort of the pinnacle of everything that Josie has felt over the past three years kind of culminating into one moment. So, I'm excited for people to see it.

8. You recently came out as queer. How has playing Josie, who’s pansexual, impacted you personally?

I felt a lot of pressure when I initially booked Josie because I was still figuring out who I was and what my label was. And playing a character who was so comfortable in who she was, it was inspiring [to me] in a way that I think a lot of other people watching the show have been inspired. I have so many people constantly telling me that watching Josie on the show has made them feel more comfortable in themselves. It's kind of amazing that we all have the same experience in that having queer representation makes you more comfortable.

9. You’ve been vocal about your Asian identity, and your character has spoken Japanese on the show. Did you have a hand in incorporating that into Josie’s character?

No, not at all! So, I spoke Japanese a few times on the [Instagram] Live and one of our writers, Penny Cox, saw me speaking Japanese and immediately went to Brett [Matthews] and was like, "We need to make this happen somehow." And then all of a sudden, I had a script in my hands. So it was a surprise, but a fun one.

BuzzFeed: Are you fluent in Japanese?

Gosh, no! I'm barely fluent in English. [Laughs] I would say I speak at the level of maybe a second-grader on a good day, though.

10. If you could pitch any storyline for Josie, what would it be?

I always joke that I want an episode that takes place overnight. That way, we all have to be wearing pajamas the entire episode. I just want to wear some comfy clothes for a whole two weeks, that's my main goal. So we can have a pajama episode, that's my pitch.

11. What's it like getting into character for Dark Josie scenes?

It's different in the sense that I know Josie so well. And knowing Josie in turn makes me understand Dark Josie. I have a whole different playlist of music that I listen to for Dark Josie — and I have the wig, which helps a lot with getting into character.

BuzzFeed: Well, now I have to ask what music is on that playlist!

I think "Bury a Friend" by Billie Eilish is a great one for Dark Josie. Also, "Villain" by K/DA is a prime example of a perfect song for Dark Josie, so I listen to that one as well.

12. What's your go-to Starbucks order?

Plain black iced Americano. Aria [Shahghasemi, who plays Landon] says I drink coffee like a sociopath. [Laughs]

13. What TV show are you currently binging?

I just finished watching Alice in Borderland, which is a Japanese show on Netflix. And I know Feel Good Season 2 just came out, so I think that's my next binge.

14. Damon or Stefan?

Stefan! They're both beautiful and I love them very much, but I'm Team Stefan when it comes to Elena.

15. If you could work with anyone from The Vampire Diaries, who would it be?

Ian Somerhalder has a lot of dogs. So, maybe I want to work with him for the sole reason of just talking about dogs. [Writer's note: Kaylee revealed she has two rescue dogs, one whom was sleeping right next to them during the interview! Kaylee described the dogs as "both complete and total nuts," but said she misses them about five minutes after getting into the car to go to work.]

16. Do you think you’re most similar to Josie, Lizzie, or Hope in real life?

I would say I'm an eclectic mix of the three. I can be very headstrong like Hope, very outspoken like Lizzie, and I try to be as loving as Josie, but sometimes that doesn't always work. But I'd like to think all three.

17. Is there a role people would be surprised to learn you auditioned for, but didn't get?

I've been auditioning since I was eight, so there's quite a few Disney Channel shows and movies. And I'm sure people would be surprised because I think I auditioned for like, all of them. It's very funny, one of the first jobs I ever booked in television was Kickin' It with Leo Howard [Ethan]. Talk about full circle — going from being 12 years old and having no idea what I'm doing to being a series regular on [Legacies] and welcoming Leo to the set.

18. Who's your favorite Disney princess?

Oh, I love Mulan so much. She was, like, my first crush ever. I also love Moana, but it's Mulan 1,000%.

19. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

I mean, I do eat rice every day. So maybe just white rice — you can make rice into candy and...yeah, let's go with rice.

20. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could only bring one book, what would it be?

Oh no! I recently read The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers, and I really enjoyed that book. Oh god, Is that the one that I want to bring, though? I mean, I really enjoyed it and it has many different aspects to it. I don't know. Or should I go with Harry Potter? I go through different genres too, like right now I'm in a big sci-fi phase, but other times I'll go the opposite direction and only read biographies. Yeah, that's super hard. I don't think I would know!

21. On that note, what's your Hogwarts house?

Initially, when I was younger, it used to just be straight-up Slytherin. And now, I recently took the Sorting Hat Quiz and I got Ravenclaw. So I'm going to go with Slytherclaw.

BuzzFeed: What's Josie's house?

Josie would be Slytherin. She tries very hard and, you know, not everyone in Slytherin is evil. She just, you know, has her way of going about things.

22. Has anything super funny or embarrassing happened to you on set?

I trip a lot on set. I get scared very easily — if I come around the corner and somebody is walking the other direction, I get scared. Everybody knows to walk slowly around me because I get scared so easily.

23. What's your wildest fan story?

I've had people cry before. And I'm an empath, so if somebody starts crying, I immediately am like, "Please don't cry, because I'm gonna cry." And then it turns into this whole thing. Once we were shooting in the town square and this young girl with her mom started crying, and I just hugged her and I didn't know what to say. So there's a lot of that. There's also the occasional, "Where's your twin?" and...I don't have one, sorry! But yeah, I would say the people who cry always throw me for a loop.

24. How do you unwind after a long day?

I have an hourlong drive home from work, so I usually listen to a lot of music. And by the time I get home, taking off all of my makeup is very therapeutic. Because over time, we're working 13-hour days, 16-hour days, and it's just powder constantly building up on my face. So, washing my face is always very therapeutic. And then just laying back and reading a book and petting my dog is the best.

25. Is there a celebrity you get told you look like a lot?

Most recently, Sara Waisglass [from Ginny & Georgia and Degrassi]. We follow each other on social media now and I completely messed up because I don't know how Twitter works at all. I forgot that there's a DMing interaction, so we followed each other and I was like, "Oh, that's nice." And then just recently, I saw that she had messaged me being like, "We're twins! We should be friends!" And I immediately messaged back, "I'm so sorry, let's be friends!"

26. Who's your biggest celebrity crush?

Oh, I have so many. But consistently since I saw Orphan Black, Tatiana Maslany. Hands down.

27. Finally, have you ever caught someone watching a TV show or movie that you're in on a flight or anywhere else?

We were all, as a cast, flying to — was it New York Comic Con, or San Diego Comic Con? — one of the Comic Cons. And we were all sitting there and we saw that Legacies was actually on the airplane as an option. And we were all just uncomfortably staring at each other. Yeah, that was surreal.

Be sure to catch Kaylee in Legacies, which airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET on The CW!

[sixtiesfangirl]

earlier this week i was tagged by @hofnerviolinbass & @stevielynnicks to answer these questions! thanks darling flowers!! ⚘⚘

today i felt like giving more elaborate answers, so it got a bit long! sorry & here it goes:

Nickname: môni

Gender: female

Star sign: libra sun, sag moon, aqua rising

Height: 171 cm

Time: 7:52 pm

Birthday: oct 16

Favorite bands/groups: the beatles, pink floyd, the who.

Favorite solo artists: paul mccartney, george harrison, jeff buckley, françoise hardy, john lennon, niall horan, sam smith

Song stuck in my head: darling be home soon by the lovin' spoonful

Last movie: seaspiracy (2021)

Last TV show: this is us (can i just say i loved the last episode? i adore nicky's storyline sm u guys...)

When did I created this blog: july 2012. i had another blog before but abandoned it... when i decided to get back on tumblr, i thought a fresh start would be better!

What do I post: classic rock and other music i enjoy, 60s stuff, photography & classic movies...

Last thing I googled: therapists in my city. since i ended up moving cities during this pandemic & can't do online therapy, i gotta find me a new one

Other blogs: @earlysixties, where all the colorful posts (and more multifandom gifsets) go to! my main blog ended up becoming mostly a b&w one and i'm digging it... so yeah! ~ tho i don't really talk much there. the rambling is basically exclusive to this one

Do I get asks: not that often! but sometimes i do get some lovely asks from some mutuals!

Following/followers: following: 348 ~ it should be a bit less but i just can't let go of the abandoned blogs of dear mutuals that left in like 2015 or smth! followers: 19k ~ idk how or why?? my blog is not really popular & it's been years since i actually posted some content! since most of them arrived around 2014 they're likely bots... there are tons of abandoned blogs as well so...

Average hours of sleep: 6h or 7h on weekdays, 9h+ on weekends

Lucky number: i don't have one!

Instruments: when i was 14 i used to play guitar but abandoned it. somehow i still know how to play many chords and could play simple tunes... so i know how to play it, but don't know yk???

What am I wearing: a vintage yellow polaroid tshirt, grey shorts & black socks with little hamburgers and fries in it

Dream job: i wonder that myself! idk what i'd like to do really & the story is: i graduated in psychology in 2018 & was halfway through a postgrad in clinical psychology (& already being certified to work as a therapist) when.... i finally realised that that's not what i want to do with my life 😂😭 so i was studying to get any job & earlier this month i got a job in my city's transit department (working with the driver's license documentation) to gather a bit of money in the meantime. so!! i still gotta figure out what to do next really! it's a mess

Dream trip: egypt & italy

Favorite food: hmm i'll say it's chocolate cake with coconut filling!

Favorite song: hello it's me by todd rundgren or orange skies by love. i can never go wrong with any of them!

Last book I read: i'm currently reading kitchen by banana yoshimoto ~ i'm really enjoying it, i'm basically underlining everything because it is that good!

Three fictional universes I’d like to live in:

1. it would be lovely to be a clay? figurine from pingu. maybe the seal or that bird that laughs at his face as he flies off after pingu saves him from the lobster (as you can see, i still have every episode engraved in brain)

2. the town from kiki's delivery service

3. there was a cartoon when i was a kid that was called "mike, lu and og", it would be nice to live in their island! i also really like the style of animation of it ~ tho sometimes it seems like it was a delusion of mine bc whenever i mention it to people they never seem to know what the hell i'm talking abt!

well that's it! thanks to whoever read it to the end! 😂

i won't be tagging anyone bc idk who has already answered this one, but hey, you can do this if you feel like regardless!

[shadowdianne]

I was tagged by @lulysmalforge, let’s see what I have to say xd

Rules: Tag 9 people you wanna catch up with/know better -if you want, if you don’t feel like answering you obviously don’t need to-

3 ships : Ah, the first question but the one I left for last Xd Ships? The ever given works?

 Nah, ok Xd Ships. After leaving SQ I haven’t actively shipped anything with the exception of BeauYasha -Those of you who like dnd or have enough time to do things/work but need something to listen to seriously go with me down the rabbit hole that is dnd games on podcast/video format. Seriously. It doesn’t even need to be Critical Role, there are a lot of dnd podcasts these days- who are characters from the current CR campaign and if anyone is craving a true slow-burn with AMAZING tact and respect on what means to grow as a person, mourn past relationships, the insufferable hope that romance always comes with and the so so tender way in where two people can found each other amongst the most interesting circumsnaces all the while with their conjoined found family trying their best to see them happy… seriously, delve into CR.

Aside from that and despite the bitterness SQ will always and forever be the ship that marked me the most -glances at their a03 account-, clearly.

As for the third ship… Cissamione counts? I love them, a lot, both the concept and the fanon ways in where they are constantly being created. I truly need to sit my ass and write a little bit more of them at some point.

Last song: According to Spotify “Villain” by Stella Jang

Last movie: LOTR I would say. I watched it again couple of weeks ago with @roomiesnotsecrettmblr. Majorly because she admitted that she hadn’t watched any of the movies and we had some time to kill so what to do best but spend some hours watching the first movie and stopping every other minute to comment on lore? We are horrible at watching a movie without stopping to go into a tangent -seriously horrible, we started a rewatch of Merlin and we needed to stop doing that because we couldn’t go about one episode without pressing stop and start talking about possible interpretations of the lore used within the series every other minute-

Currently watching: Now that I’m in the painting minis thingie I’m catching up and watching random episodes of Critical Role. Majorly because I obviously adore the campaigns and secondly because each episode is four/five hours long so I have plenty of time to paint while listening. I’m also rewatching Castle majorly because it’s “popcorn” for the brain. I’ve watched it enough to remember every episode, I don’t need to be too focused on it and I can press “halt” on my brain while doing it. Jujutsu Kaisen as well because I happen to live with someone who adores mangas/anime and she is bringing me back to that world xD

Currently reading:

Books: With the series of Shadow and Bone looming and after finishing a quick re-read of both Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom, I’m re reading the original trilogy of the Grishaverse. I was never a fan of those three books but the world felt very very compelling to me. While the romantic aspect of the drama tires me even more than it did once the rules of the Grishaverse are still so fucking cool so I’m enjoying the re-read Xd -Even if I already know the series is gonna be a clusterfuck. Come on, I also want to go to Ketterdam and see Kaz and the others but mixing both timelines??? According to what we get to see in Six of Crows Inej shoulnd’t already be with Kaz at the beginning of S&B or, if she was, she wouldn’t be the Wraith yet but still learning and cleansing herself from Tante Heleen. They are doing this because they originally wanted Six of Crows rather than the Alina Starkov storyline and mixing both is something that is already making me worry-

[Also reading CandleKeep mysteries just because roomie happened to get a copy of the book and despite being a dnd manual I always take them as bedtime stories I can later on create upon so that’s fun]

Oh! And I finished with a quick re-read of @emmasternerradley SilverBeasts because I promised that I was going to do a proper review of the second book of that story and I wanted to refresh my mind a little bit before going back to Golden Sea. I truly TRULY recommend anything written by her but those two books?? A must if you like fantasy.

Comic/Webcomic: Re-reading Sunstone atm as well. I just adore their dynamic and visually the comic is to die for. Also reading Lore Olympus every other week ofc. I truly want to know where they will go with the story. And punderworld whenever I can. And several others xD

Fanfic: Not much from me on that front currently. I recently re-read @delirious-comfort Whispers in the Night -SQ, so good- but, yup, other than that I’m staying slightly off fandom world.

Currently craving: TIME

Not shown in the original tag-game but random recs of things because I happen to want for more people to read/listen to them:

The Priory of the Orange Tree

Gideon and Harrow the Ninth -both books, yup, trust me-

The city and the city by China Mieville -well, anything from him really but I get not wanting to read Perdido Street Station because THAT is a thick boi and while I’m crazy and I started from there it’s quite a lot. If you like sci-fi and constant evolving conversation on how linguistics work, I then rec Embassytown from him-

Spotify’s Meija’s Army playlist

Tagging:

@waknatious @stregaomega  -how are you dear?- @pressuredrightnow  @naralanis @ryshai @drummergirl72713  @idontgetpaidforthis (this is not a tag for you per se but a reminder to check your twitter :P) @alternate8reality annnnd @godandmonsters1996

[siriusbunbryist]

In defence of Abed x Annie.

Thanks to the magic of Netflix, I’ve rewatched Community at age 24, and still found Abed and Annie to have hit the heartstrings as much as I did when I was in high school watching the show for the first time.

But watching the series in its entirety just reinforces my thought that Abed and Annie had so much potential that was wasted, and it’s a shame that the writers planted all these seeds to only decide that perhaps this direction was not worth it / too risky / unfavoured by the audience. But I mean, Alison Brie herself (and I’m assuming Danny Pudi as well) endorsed them! Find here and here.

This was a pairing that with all the crumbs scattered throughout the show (I think we are all aware of these crumbs I speak of), could’ve easily played the “oh we’ve been secretly dating this whole time” trope during the last episode and it would’ve still made sense.

Naturally I did some scoping, and of course unsurprisingly the J.eff x Annie pairing takes the cake, while not a lot of love for Abed x Annie. So here are common points of contentions I see surrounding Abed and Annie, and my rationale on them.

Before I start, a note - I fully respect the J.eff x Annie ship and I don’t intend on starting a ship w.ar/debate. I understand where their support comes from! I just needed to vent because no one else in my social circle watches this show. No hate please.

1. Abed doesn’t see Annie romantically

I think on the contrary it’s been set up rather long ago that Abed at the very least is attracted to Annie.

Exhibit A: “What are you making” in Beginner Pottery

Exhibit B: “Flat B.utt and the one Abed wants to nail” in The Art of Discourse

This video basically explains it! The summary: Annie is Pierce’s favourite, Pierce constantly insults Britta, therefore Britta is flat b.utt.

Exhibit C: Not even trying to hide it in Accounting for Lawyers

But, a romantic interest has to be further built upon finding someone attractive right? There has to be intrigue to their character, such as

Exhibit D: “I can only connect to people through... movies” in English as a Second Language

It is pretty obvious here that Annie is a rare someone who has successfully broken the impartial screen that Abed filters everything through. Jeff saw it too which is why he said Annie was the ark of the covenant before Abed fell for her disney face. I can only imagine Abed to be quite struck with Annie’s infiltration.

A romantic interest should also share common interests, such as

Exhibit E: “Which makes Annie is my third favourite show” in Paranormal Parentage

I’ve said before that for Abed, a guy who lives life and communicates through comparing it with television and movies, it’s not unthinkable for him to be attracted to someone who genuinely watches his favourite shows and commits to roles during cosplay. And who, besides Troy, would fit this profile? Annie. 

And finally, the biggest indicator of it all, we also see how Abed views the Jeff and Annie pairing in everyone’s favourite episode Remedial Chaos Theory. Keeping in mind that the timelines are rendered by Abed, out of all the timelines, J.eff and Annie only kis.sed when Abed left the room for pizza. As well, as conjured in Abed’s head, Evil Jeff and Evil Annie only existed as a couple in the Darkest Timeline. To me at least, it’s arguable that this alludes to Abed’s omniscient “director” standpoint that he may be the obstacle in the Jeff and Annie relationship - pointing towards him perhaps harbouring feelings for Annie.

2. Annie doesn’t see Abed romantically The general consensus on this point is that Annie is only attracted to Abed when he’s playing a character. I rather think that being attracted to someone, and being attracted to someone during role play, aren’t mutually exclusive. Let’s take a look at the different characters that Abed played.

Don Draper: serious, sophisticated, and smooth.

Han Solo: immature, flirty and a smarta.ss.

Batman: mysterious, complex, and brave.

Three different personas, yet Annie responded to all of them. Since the common denominator to all three is that they are played by Abed, I would like to offer a counterpoint that perhaps the attraction to Abed has always been there, it’s just emphasized when Abed plays a character. Who knows, role playing might even be Annie’s ki.nk. After all, during For a Few Paintballs More, it is shown that Annie is disappointed when Abed dropped the Han Solo persona after the battle ended.

Annie also loves big romantic gestures. Who’s better than doing that than Abed? Since the beginning, Abed has already been doing big romantic gestures of varying degrees for Annie. With this, it’s not ridiculous for Annie to see Abed as a romantic potential.

Exhibit F: Staying in a room for 26 hours in Social Psychology

Annie: You sat in a room for twenty-six straight hours. Didn’t that bother you?  Abed: Yeah I was livid.  Annie: Then why didn’t you leave?  Abed: Because you asked me to stay and you said we were friends.

Exhibit G: Rescuing her from “captivity” and inviting her to move in in Remedial Chaos Theory and Studies in Modern Movement (even Troy was surprised at Abed’s invitation)

Exhibit H: Tearing down the Dreamatorium in Studies in Modern Movement

Annie: What about the Dreamatorium? Abed: Oh it's staying. The Dreamatorium is more important than any of us. But you're more important than our bedroom so we put the bunk bed in the blanket fort.

Bonus: Confirmed by Alison Brie

3. The show was about Jeff and Annie

Dan Harmon said that Community’s approach is that anything and any pairing is possible. We see this is as the series started with the classic “player vs smart snarky girl” trope with setting up Jeff and Britta as the main pairing. We also see Troy and Annie as the potential B couple in the show. The writers also threw Pierce and Shirley, Annie and Britta, Dean and Jeff, and even Chang and Britta in for a laugh.

And then the show subverted this all by introducing Jeff and Annie, and made Troy and Britta a couple, showing us that Community is a show that intends on breaking these classic sitcom stereotypes by experimenting with different pairings. Abed and Annie was no exception to this, as the writers often pair them up in different shenanigans and hint at possible grounds to explore*.

A few examples: Han and Leia in For a Few Paintballs More, Hector the Well Endowed and the Elf Maiden in Advanced Dungeons and Dragons, spy partners in Modern Espionage.

No doubt that the show dabbled in and out of Jeff and Annie throughout the series. However, to say that Jeff and Annie was the primary pairing in the series would mean overlooking Jeff and Britta. Especially when Jeff and Britta have the whole love-hate dynamic, three(?) marriage close-calls, and emotional snippets such as helping Jeff reunite with his father in Cooperative Escapism in Familial Relations.

Anyway, not to discredit Jeff and Annie, but knowing that the show explores the possibility of different pairings**, why write off Abed and Annie?

* Not to mention that the cop pairing in The Science of Illusion was originally written with Abed and Annie in mind! ** We also see a stray Abed and Britta during Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps.

4. Annie is in love with Jeff To keep this short and shipper-goggle free, Annie has said on numerous occasions that she’s in love with the idea of Jeff, not Jeff himself. Specifically this scene in Virtual Systems Analysis:

Abed as Annie: "…We love Jeff…" Annie: "No we don’t, we’re just in love with the idea of being loved. And if we can teach a guy like Jeff to do it, we’ll never be unloved, so we keep running the same scenario over and over hoping for a different result."

And this scene in Conventions of Space and Time:

Annie: All right, I may have been play-acting that we were married, and then the staff thought you were cheating, and I had to save face. Jeff: Do I have to worry about this? Annie: No, I was just daydreaming. I mean, I've married you at least a half a dozen times. And Troy. And Zac Efron.

Not to mention that their conversation in the finale says it all.

Jeff: I don't wanna be fine. I wanna be 25 and heading out into the world. I wanna fall asleep on a beach and be able to walk the next day, or stay up all night on accident. I wanna wear a white t-shirt without looking like I forgot to get dressed.* I want to be terrified of AIDS, I want to have an opinion about those, boring a.ss Marvel movies. And I want those opinions to be of any concern to the people making them. Annie: Well I want to live in the same home for more than a year, order wine without feeling nervous, have a resume full of crazy mistakes instead of crazy lies. I want stories and wisdom, perspective. I wanna have so much behind me I'm not a sl.ave to what's in front of me, especially those flavourless unremarkable Marvel movies.

*Shipper-goggle on: Part of me thinks this is a reference to Abed, whose iconic style almost exclusively comprises T-shirts. What Jeff is saying is that he wishes he is 25 again with his future open before him, someone who compatible with Annie, but here he acknowledges that he isn’t, and lets her go in the end.

5. Abed and Annie wouldn’t work as a couple Another point I see is that Abed and Annie are strictly platonic and are more like brother and sister. On the basis that they have made out a couple times and are attracted to each other, I would disagree with the sibling statement.  

Troy, in contrast to Abed, I think actually resembles a more sibling-like relationship with Annie. Although Troy and Annie have the strong friendship of Abed and Annie, when disregarding the high school crush stage of season 1, their storylines never dwelled further down an attraction path, nor was there any specific episode that was dedicated to a deep dive of vulnerabilities and confrontation between them. As a comparison, Troy and Britta had opportunities to explore these setups (Troy admitted to lying about his b.utt stuff story and Troy helped Britta face Blade) - an indication that Troy and Britta were heading into non-platonic territory. Jeff and Britta too, had several opportunities to confront their feelings (up till the very last season), a clear indication of a non-platonic relationship.

For Abed and Annie, what I think pulls their friendship towards actual love interest potential is best pinpointed to Virtual Systems Analysis. Annie’s participation in the Dreamatorium prompted her to not only fully submerge into the way Abed thinks and comprehends his surroundings, but she also got to understand and address Abed’s stubbornness and flaws in a vulnerable way, confronting some of her own flaws as well.

Abed as Shirley: Your hospital school, young lady, is a simulation being run through a filter of other people's needs. Abed's been filtered out because nobody needs him. Annie: I need him!

And to point out this little tidbit in VCR Maintenance and Educational Publishing,

Annie: That's why Abed is like a brother to me. You guys are so alike. Abed: I can't accept that based on one time machine story.

This whole episode, instead of establishing Abed is like Annie’s brother, I would argue is rather doing the opposite. Abed and Annie’s hyper antics in the episode were basically matched by Anthony and Rachel’s blatant indifference and confusion. For lots of Abed and Annie supporters, this episode was a major setback. But I think it instead highlights how in-sync they are with each other, which is a good thing.

Another point, despite Annie trying to prove otherwise, Abed and Anthony had different vibes, and each shared different dynamics with Annie. And as Anthony pointed out in the end, who were Abed and Annie trying to replace in the apartment? Troy. The person who they are trying to fill is Troy - their roommate, their brother, their best friend. Troy was the brother role that neither Abed and Annie can fill for each other.

In Basic Sandwich, we get this exchange:

Abed: The point is, this show, Annie, it isn't just their show. This is our show, and it's not over. And the sooner we find that treasure, the faster the Jeff-Britta pilot falls apart. Annie: Got it. Thank you, Abed. Abed: You're welcome. I have a girlfriend. Annie: What? Abed: You were about to start a kiss lean. Annie: I was not.

Not only did Abed saw right through Annie’s anxiety and comforted her in his own uniquely Abed way, but he also felt the need to remind her of his girlfriend. The fact that he broke the fourth wall here is likely the writers’ way to be meta, but simply acknowledging the tension and bond there says a lot in between the lines. If tension does not exist, there would be no need for this line.

Besides, instead of thinking that they’re strictly platonic (which of course is also okay), they would rather work great as a couple. In terms of opposites attract, Annie grounds Abed with just the right amount, while Abed clearly encourages Annie to be her true self and be immature. Such as this scene in Foosball and Nocturnal Vigilantism,

Annie: I’m following him.  Troy: You moving in here was supposed to tone us down!

Annie also doesn’t just tolerate Abed’s idiosyncrasies, she actually likes them and fully participates as multiple paintball games and cosplays would tell us. Special shoutout to the missing lovers footage in Wedding Videography, which through Britta, actually shows us that Annie is the only one who would go along with Abed’s projects - while Britta found the project extremely weird and unhealthy, Annie thought it was fun and commits well to her role.

And while others may tiptoe around Abed, Annie isn’t afraid to call Abed out when he’s out of line and makes a point to teach him about empathy in Virtual Systems Analysis. Remember that Britta tried teaching him this but it didn’t work as well.

I am Abed Nadir... And I don't know a lot of things everyone else knows. I wander the universe with my friend, Troy, doing whatever I want. Sometimes accidentally hurting innocent unremarkables. This week, however, Troy went to lunch and I adapted. I now have the ability to enter the minds of others using an elusive new technique known as "empathy".

As well as in the entire episode of Cooperative Polygraphy.

They also know each other best. Abed knew her cushion preferences, was the one who spelled out her true pas.sion for forensics, and after living together, Annie knew how to navigate Abed’s peculiarities and to soothe him whenever he had a nervous breakdown. 

Annie also knows him so well that she can predict his reaction.

They are also each other’s exception. Annie was always the one who manages to pull Abed out of a trance and back to reality, usually with touch.

Abed is also very forgiving with her. An example is when Annie seemingly lost all common sense because she broke Abed’s special edition dvd in Foosball and Nocturnal Vigilantism.

Annie: Well, Batman, on behalf of all of us that aren't perfect, can I just say I'm sorry I broke your DVD? Abed: Apology accepted. But I wouldn't mention it to Abed. That guy's pretty ruthless. And that's coming from Batman.

And in Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas, Annie was the only claymation doll that didn’t have a weird form (except Troy as toy soldier of course). Annie was a ballerina because Abed sees her as a creature of grace. Abed was also the first one who got her “brighter tomorrow” diorama and responded with enthusiasm.

They are also in the same stage in life. As Dan Harmon explains the choice of Abed and Annie being the ones who leave the group, with Troy gone, Abed and Annie symbolize the many possibilities of the future - a possibility that makes them viable. I like to think Annie transfers to the LA FBI office after her internship and they reunite.

And as the Spice Girls said, “if you wanna be my love.r, you gotta get with my friends”. In Paleyfest, Dan Harmon says this about whoever Troy and Abed ends up dating, “I mean a woman that comes into either of their lives is either going to drive them apart or she's going to have to be really accepting of a very special relationship”.

Britta tolerated their friendship but to a point of asking Annie to distract Abed for alone time with Troy, Troy dumped the librarian as she called Abed weird, Robin disappeared, Rachel we never got to see much of, but was pretty quiet and separated from the group. From this, logically speaking, Annie would actually be the perfect match for Abed, as we all know they’re the ultimate trio within the study group and a transition from friends to more will be natural. 

Oh, and, Abed is wrong. They’re not Chandler and Phoebe with little storylines together, they’re Chandler and Monica. 

Anyway, that’s it for my super long rant/analysis. Community the series is done and over, so there isn’t a need for any ship war. All I want to say is, if #andamovie happens, hopefully, the writers will actually take a leap.

[sometimesrosy]

Hi Rosy, I am sending some positivity to you! I have strong faith in S7, despite some seasons being a bit weaker, the whole story is absolutely amazing and keep me on the edge every year. I think they will do again great job, sometimes I am like how can you close this whole story in "only" 16 episodes, but then I realize it is cca 13 hours net time, which is still more then all 3 movies of Lord of the rings = so enough time :) I am super excited about the other planets. Cant wait for the airing

Thank you! I appreciate it. 

Yes I think they’re doing a great job too. Maybe one of the reasons some seasons don’t seem as strong ( I happen to think seasons 5 and 6 are strong ones,) is because they are using those seasons to tell the long term story, so some of it doesn’t seem to make sense, until you look at the end point. But once you can identify the end point, a lot of it seems to make sense.

How can they wrap up all that story in just 16 episodes?

I think because they have already BEGUN to wrap up all that story. They use every season to tell the long term story. They’ve wrapped up Kabby, though it was sad. They wrapped up the Blake split and moved us on to rescue mission. They wrapped up memori, more or less and we’ll find out their story next season. Raven i’m still wondering about, but she seems to be going somewhere. Sanctum seems mostly done. We know so much more about Becca and Eligius and the hedas than we did before. All that nightblood and AIs should all be connected. We have a lot of mythology. We have Ash’s past and...if you’re paying attention... B/E unravelling before our eyes... but a lot of people aren’t seeing it. IDK why.

And we have Bellarke who fell in love, were separted for 6 years, came back together with different loyalties, betrayal although soulmates, forgiveness, NEED, choosing to bring her back despite the risk to his people, the head and the heart, and then saving sanctum and humanity... leading into the final season when their relationship will take its final form. No matter what it is.

It’s all been developing as we go along and I suspect as we wrap up more storylines, it will make sense and feel satisfying.

[ohwriteiforgot]

Soooo ~smirks~ time to return the favour!! What about your Top 10 All-Time Favourite Movies? 😏💖💖

Cheeky! Somehow, every time I have to make a list of things, said things evaporate from my head. Like, what are movies? Have I seen any??? I’ll try to do my best, though! I’m also pretty sure I only got the top 5 in the right order 😅

   10. The Breakfast Club (1985)

Yeah, uh, this movie is just amazing. A group of kids with nothing in common coming together and becoming friends in the end? Sign me up! It was funny, it was interesting, it sends an important message. There’s a reason it’s a classic 💜

   9. Life as We Know It (2010)

I feel like this one you’ll love if you haven’t already seen it, Lily, it’s got all the best tropes: enemies to friends to lovers, living together, co-parenting. It’s bittersweet and tooth-rotting and I. LOVE. THIS. MOVIE. 

   8. Hobbs & Shaw (2019)

I’ve never been the biggest ‘Fast and Furious’ franchise’s fan, but this movie. I know a lot of people didn’t like it, but I absolutely loved it. It was just so fun! A buddy-cop type of movie, except they’re running from the law, in a life-or-death situation, bickering like an old married couple. Also, I will give my life for Hattie Shaw. I won’t even deny it, she was probably the best part of the movie. Sigh.

   7. Now You See Me (1 & 2) (2013/2016)

Both movies. But I count them as one. Why they’re on the list? Have you seen them? If you have, then you know why. If you haven’t, PLEASE GO WATCH THEM!!!!! One thing about me, I love having fun while watching movies. That’s why half of this list is filled with titles that made me feel this way, and the other half is filled with titles that made me cry / made me think about life. This is of the first kind, obviously. Illusionists! Amazing tricks! Awesome plot! Dave Franco! Oops, this one slipped, heh. 

   6. Black Panther (2018)

My question for you: Are you surprised? This one fits into both categories. It’s spectacular. It’s incredible. It shows both points of view and makes you think. What’s right, what’s wrong? It’s beautiful, and the storyline is just AMAZIIIIING! And it has such awesome jokes, and I’m a sucker for those. Remember the Oscars just after Black Panther came out? Remember how everyone admitted that this movie would have snatched all awards? I do and I still think about that. 

   5. The Hitman’s Bodyguard (2017)

Ryan Reynolds + Samuel Jackson. I should honestly just leave it at that. Listen, my mom loved this movie. My mom doesn’t like action movies. This has to speak for itself, okay? They Let Samuel Jackson Say Motherfucker. Man, I love this movie. (We have Deadpool and Nick Fury, and on top of that, there’s Elektra too.) 

   4. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018)

I wasn’t really a Spider-Man fan until Homecoming. Idk, I just never vibed with the movies. And then it turned out I needed a father figure for Spider-Man. As seen in the gif, sometimes you need your father figure to teach you the webs by throwing you over the railing. It’s a found family type of situation. We love a found family type of situation. The animation and the style are b e a u t i f u l. The dialogue is witty and at the same time thought-inducing. This movie. This is a masterpiece, okay?

   3. Pride and Prejudice (2005)

I think this was the first classic I ever saw. I honestly can’t put into words the feelings this movie gives me. I can try, though. Serenity. Longing. Desperation. Love. (And Envy. Where am I supposed to find a Mr. Darcy, huh?) The actors just did such a perfect job here. I can’t even, seriously.

   2. Avengers (2012)

I’m not gonna elaborate on this one. It’s plain obvious.

   1. Little Women (2019)

I cry so many times when I watch this. I have no idea how it managed to dig so deep inside of my chest cavity and get hold of my heart and squeeze it in its grasp. I can talk about Little Women for hours and hours. I can talk about Amy’s growth and Meg’s dreams and Jo’s loneliness and Beth’s kindness for hours. The wardrobe was stunning. The script was perfect. The cinematography, the direction of this film, they’re mind-blowing. THE ACTING IS OUT OF THIS WORLD. I love Little Women and I will always love Little Women and I will never forgive the Academy for robbing Greta Gerwig of her awards.

Soooo that’s my list! Thank you soooo much for asking, Lily, I’d forgotten some of them! COME YELL WITH ME ABOUT THESE!!💖💜

[photolover82]

The Masked Singer Season 3 Episode 12: The Last Four of the Elite Eight (Face-offs Part 2 Commentary & Guesses)

Hi my fellow Masked Singer fans! It’s that time of the week, time for Ana’s Masked Singer Recap. After a week off because of that weird sing a long episode that I don’t know what to think tbh, we are back with the second & last part of the Face-Offs. The format is just like the first part of this round (link here: https://photolover82.tumblr.com/post/614974157920337920/the-masked-singer-season-3-episode-11-the-first) btw. So, having said that, let’s get started!  (Disclaimer: Spoilers ahead, proceed with caution.. don’t say I didn’t warn you)

Ok, so the first pair of the night is the Frog vs. Kitty 

First up was Frog, performing Fireball by Pitbull. 

Ok, so honestly, this was an upsetting performance to talk about because it just felt super repetitive to everything he has done so far. I am just really hoping for a change of pace from him because all he does is rap and do some dance moves. Also picking up Pitbull song was a terrible idea for his voice because it seemed like he was out of breath trying to keep up with Pitbull's distinct speed of rapping & also some of the Spanish elements of the song because he doesn’t know Spanish. So, I am really hoping that moving forward he will switch it up because it’s getting boring at this point. 

Next came his rival/girlfriend? (idk there is this romantic storyline between them which is weird if they are who I think they are), the Kitty, performing True Colors by Cyndi Lauper. 

Alright, I enjoyed her performance a lot more than the Frog, but I can still give her the same critique. She’s been only doing ballads, which are great because of her voice and it goes with her, but I also want to see her do something more fun or upbeat maybe with choreography. 

So, having said that, the winner/the person moving on to the top 6 is to my dismay.... FROG!! Yeah, let’s just say not happy with this result. 

So, for the next/last pairing of both the night & round, we have Banana vs. Rhino! 

First up was the Banana, performing "Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” by Bob Dylan. 

Ok, ya I guess it was a good performance, but it shows that he isn’t the most vocally strong of the contestants. However, he is talented, it was really cool that he played the piano in the beginning and he freaking kicked the stool for God’s sakes. I gotta give him props, but it still didn’t knock my socks off or anything. 

Last was the Rhino, who sang 10,000 Hours by Dan & Shay and Justin Bieber. 

Again, I have the same critique for Rhino as for Banana. It was great and the song suited his voice just as it did for Banana, but it wasn’t amazing nor wowing at all. There was no wow factor to the performance. However, it was pretty good and I enjoyed it better than Banana’s performance. 

Anyways, I kind of figured this would happen.... the winner of this duel was RHINO!! 

Alright, so that means we are onto the smackdown of the Kitty vs. Banana.. which went like this:

Kitty went first, with Unstoppable by SIA. 

I really enjoyed this more than her actual performance (I would say it was the best of the night since the other performances didn’t blow me away.). You can really tell that she is so vocally talented and has an insane range in her voice. 

Then came Banana who did Brick House by The Commodores. 

It was good ngl, but it didn’t beat out the Kitty at all. I feel like she really beat him in the vocal department and he didn’t do anything dance wise or performance wise that was more entertaining than hers for him to stay. 

Having said that, I think you can guess that the person unmasked was...

BANANA

who was revealed to be (as I figured out for a while)...

BRET MICHEALS 

Yeah as you guys probably saw from my previous posts, I figured this one out but here’s an explanation of the latest suitcase clues: 

X-ray of a cat= CAT Scan= brain hemorrhage from an injury at the Tony’s 

Bug Spray= reference to his band Poison

Tags (Backstage Crew & Tongue sticking out) = his time in the rock & roll industry 

Nashville Sheriff Badge= he was a judge on talent show Nashville Star

Now that we are done with that, let’s talk about my guesses (none have changed) and how the new clues confirm them:

1. For Frog, my guess is Bow Wow (duh) 

Suitcase Clues:

Japanese Flag= Bow Wow is also the name of an influential Japanese rock band

Keyboard with L & I blacked out= reference to his old nickname “Lil” Bow Wow

Ice Cube Tray= worked with Ice Cube in a movie called Lottery Ticket

“Thank God it’s Frogday” tag= R&B Friday radio show he hosts in Australia 

2. For Kitty, my guess is Jackie Evancho (took me a while to get it but I am certain I finally got it) 

Suitcase Clues:

Pope’s Hat= played for pope September 2015

Mouse= worked for Disney, house of Mouse if you will (i.e. covered many Disney songs, appeared on Wizards of Waverly Place) 

Angel Ornament= song called Concrete Angel 

3. For Rhino, my guess is Barry Zito. (I’m convinced y’all) 

Suitcase Clues:

Rhino Secrets= album called No Secrets

Tennessee flag= played for Nashville Sounds (at end of baseball career) 

Seal= he played for the Giants whose mascot is a seal

Base Clef= reference to his baseball career

Alright, that”s it! I will see you guys for the next one. Bye! 

[saoirse-argentum]

I decided it would be more entertaining (for myself at least) to answer these as Saoirse…So I did…Everything outside of the last set of Q and A anyway. Haurchefant also makes a guest appearance. XD

B A S I C S .

FULL NAME:   Saoirse Argentum! NICKNAME(S): Sunshine and Somebunny. I’m told I have a cheery disposition and I love puns.   AGE: 29. BIRTHDAY: 19th Sun of the 1st Astal Moon (Jan. 19th) ETHNIC GROUP: Viera, Rava. NATIONALITY: Gridanian.  LANGUAGE(S) : Common. Dalmascan. High Ivalician. And I’m pretty sure I’ve figured out Mooglespeak….Kupo. SEXUAL ORIENTATION: I like them Elezen boys…and I’m a sucker for a handsome Dragoon.   ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Heteromantic and hopeless. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Eternally pining over Estinien. HOME TOWN/AREA: Old Gridania. CURRENT HOME: I still call Old Gridania home, but I spend a lot of time in Ishgard. PROFESSION: White Mage, Serpent Captain for the Order of the Twin Adder…Secretly a Gunbreaker…A bad one, but a girl can dream!

P H Y S I C A L .

HAIR: Brunette EYES: Green. FACE: Hmm. How did Haurchefant put it? You know what, I’ll just let him answer these next few. “If I had a star for every time her beauty brightened my day, I would have a galaxy.” LIPS: “Pink, supple and saccharine.” COMPLEXION: “Lightly sun-kissed.” BLEMISHES: “Not a one in sight…but her freckles…sprinkled like sugar and sweet.” SCARS: “None that I can see…Perhaps I should check.” “No.” TATTOOS: “A heart with my name on it, just above her breast.” “ALSO NO!” HEIGHT:  “Approx. 5’8”. Short for a Viera…I could just keep her in my pocket.” WEIGHT: “A gentleman would never tell.” “130lbs.” BUILD: “Like a brickhouse.” FEATURES: “Long lashes, slender legs, and her breasts—” “Okay, you’re done here.” ALLERGIES: Bananas and cats…both of which I enjoy. A true tragedy. USUAL HAIR STYLE:  Curled with angled bangs and styled to rest over my shoulder on one side. USUAL FACE LOOK: I smile a lot, I guess? USUAL CLOTHING: Thigh-high boots, skirts and dresses, and while in dungeons generally my White Mage robes.

P S Y C H O L O G Y .

FEAR(S): Loss. Letting my friends down…and the dark. ASPIRATION(S): Protect Eorzea, learn to be as good a fighter as I am a healer, and win the heart of Ishgard’s Grandest Grump! POSITIVE TRAITS: I suppose my empathy and optimism. NEGATIVE TRAITS: I can be stubborn and sometimes my shyness can be misconstrued as coldness. MBTI:  INFJ (“The Advocate”) ZODIAC: Capricorn. TEMPERAMENT: Somewhere between Melancholic and Phlegmatic. SOUL TYPE(S): An artisan.   ANIMAL(S): Vulpes Vulpes! Or the Astute Fox, a charming carnivore. VICE HABIT(S): I can be relatively reckless at times. FAITH: By the Twelve! GHOSTS?: Where?! AFTERLIFE?: Yes. There is something after all this. REINCARNATION?: I wouldn’t say it’s an impossibility all things considered. ALIENS?: I’m like 75% sure that Hildibrand is from another planet. POLITICAL ALIGNMENT: I’m a proud member of the Eorzean Alliance. EDUCATION LEVEL:  I have a high desire for learning, so I study whatever I can, when I can.

F A M I L Y .

FATHER: I never met him and my mother spoke little of him. MOTHERS:  Relme Argentum. SIBLINGS: Only child. EXTENDED FAMILY: Cassie Drauman…We’re practically sisters. NAME MEANING(S): Saoirse means “freedom” and Argentum is a metal so it’s considered “shining” in some circles. HISTORICAL CONNECTION?: None that I can verify. When I was kid, I heard rumors that my father was Hyur: Hilghlander who fought for Ala Mhigo during the Garlean invasion.

F A V O R I T E S .

BOOK: I love so many…but I enjoy a good romance story. DEITY: Menphina. HOLIDAY: Heavensturn. MONTH: October…there’s just a certain feeling in the air. SEASON: Fall PLACE: The Dravanian Hinterlands, near Matoya’s Cave! WEATHER: Brisk Autumn days with just a slight breeze…enough to stir the leaves.   SOUND(S): Soft rain and crackling fires. Thunder and crunch of leaves beneath your feet. SCENT(S): The smell of earth after it rains. Strawberries and roses. TASTE(S):  Whiskey kisses. <3 FEEL(S): Plush Velvets…Estinien’s hair. >_> <_< ANIMAL(S): Estinien…but really, puppies. NUMBER(S): 19 is my lucky number! COLOR(S): Pink and pastels.

E X T R A .

TALENT(S): My propensity for puns. BAD AT: Dance and tanking…which obviously go hand in hand. TURN ONS: Estinien is glaring really hard at me right now… TURN OFFS: Cruelty. Smelling like a Sahagin corpse covered in moldy stone cheese. HOBBIES: Reading, sleeping, and baking. TROPES: White Mage, Healing Hands, Girl Next Door, Manic Pixie Dream Girl, and the Klutz. QUOTE(S): “To let evil do evil, to do nothing in its presence is the same as taking their side. Being a hero means taking a stand.”  “I used to be good at wordplay…once a pun a time.”

M U N   Q U E S T I O N S .

Q1: If you could write your character your way in their own movie, what would it be called, what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about? A1:  It doesn’t matter what I write, romance is usually central to the storyline, so it wouldn’t be any different with Saoirse. It would probably be a reverse harem style anime and all her party members would be beautiful men (standard archetypes) who want to protect Eorzea alongside her while vying for her heart. It would be called: All My Party Members are Bachelors. XD

Q2: What would their soundtrack/score sound like? A2: Probably a combination of Ayumi Hamasaki and Abingdon Boys School.

Q3: Why did you start writing this character? A3: She has a strong, bubbly voice and I spend so much time working on projects with more reserved heroines that it’s nice to break away from that without having to stress over my problematic perfectionism.

Q4: What first attracted you to this character? A4: I really like writing from the perspective of a character who doesn’t take herself too seriously…It makes writing dialogue enjoyable because I don’t have to stress about whether or not she’s actually funny so long as she finds herself amusing.

Q5: Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse. A5: Sometimes she’s a little too passive or naïve. I think part of that is because I’m so used to playing as a healer that I forget she can be strong in other ways.

Q6: What do you have in common with your muse?           A6: We’re both hopeless romantics and we both enjoy really simple humor…so easily amused.

Q7: How does your muse feel about you? A7: I dunno, let me ask.

“Are you French?...Because Eiffel for you.”

Ha!

Q8: What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with? A8: As a Manic Pixie Dream Girl, her most interesting interactions are with grumps or others with her sense of humor. Either way the banter is generally amusing.

Q9: What gives you inspiration to write your muse?     A9: Listening to music is one, but drawing is another one. I love drawing Saoirse with other characters and imagining scenes or interactions to bring to life visually and that generally spurs my writing.

Q10: How long did this take you to complete? A10: About two hours…because my dogs and significant other really enjoy distracting me, but it’s cool because I enjoy it too.

[elizabethrobertajones]

(part 1) this is random but something im curious about is do you think the next few years will see a radical shift in more lead lgbt couples in shows? i feel like when supernatural started it was all about subtext/queerbating between characters we would never see canon (maybe), the last few years have seen an update in more side lgbt characters/couples and while not a lot, more main lgbt characters then we had before. I don't know if tumblr/twitter fandom translates to general audience...

Yeah, I mean, the only way is up. I feel lucky that I managed to encounter a fair amount of queer content in my formative years, whether targeted programming on TV, or taking the route of not really differentiating the perceived cultural value of independent media like webcomics and webnovels etc from the mass media as I was young enough to naturally grow up on the internet as the internet itself was growing up and web 2.0 was pretty much taking off alongside my use of the internet. And that I had liberal parents who didn’t regulate our internet, and lived in a community where culturally I didn’t really fear being discovered casually accessing all this like in particularly this terrifying seeming evangelical christian community in America.

Which really makes me feel like A: everyone should feel that comfortable in themselves via the media as I did as a mass accessible thing or B: that the world at large should be soaked in as much representation and more that I encountered as a curious teen because at the very least it did me no harm and at best helped handhold me through an awful lot. 

And then brings us to the problem that the world isn’t actually like that and for a lot of people their media is restricted one way or another, from everything such as the era of social media weirdly making us much LESS broadly travelled on the internet as I was back in the day (SO many bookmarks - I had like 100 that I would check either daily or on their weekly update schedule, with enough habit that I had pretty much memorised it all without using an RSS feed or just following everyone’s twitter and waiting for update announcements, never mind the vast pit of things which I occasionally checked to see if their sporadic but very worth it updates had occurred somewhere in the last month/year) to the vastly overwhelming amount of media accessible to us. It seems almost to flood the market and creates this panic about watching the worthiest shows and campaigning for them and raising awareness and the FOMO and how things slip by and zomg you have to watch this that and the other, when even just making this list on Netflix now contains more hours of TV than a human lifetime and also one liable to disappear from the service at some point or another without warning. 

And then on top of that you have the absolute cultural monoliths that if you’re not going to have a cohesive culture - which now includes the entire population of the world because of our connectivity on the internet and mass-joining of services - based around smaller shows and stuff, then at the very least everyone is going to watch anything under the main Disney umbrella, other superhero flicks, animated things, and all the really big studio franchises and remakes, as well as a few TV monoliths which manage to get enough people talking to make it seem like “everyone” (again - these days it seems like that’s presumed to be the entire western world plus everywhere else these things air) are watching, like Game of Thrones or whatever… THESE properties are the inescapable ones and on that basis they’re the things we have to lean on the most for representation and then again barely get any, when it comes to gender and sexuality, due to them shooting for such worldwide markets that they can’t imply gay people exist to censors in places such as China. And it exposes the cultural awfulness inherent just in getting a white female character in the lead role of some things, or the absolute garbage fire lurking underneath that if you dare have a black stormtrooper or make one of your female ghostbusters black when you’re already ruining the childhoods of so many how dare… 

In those respects, having side characters who aren’t even major well-known superheroes or jedis or ghostbusters or whatever also be gay (because even well-known lesbian Kate McKinnon didn’t manage to get her ghostbuster to be canonically gay even if we All Knew) would be absolutely groundbreaking, even if it was, like, a role that could be snipped out for the Chinese market or something. And that’s probably exactly what would happen, and cue ensuing riot from whichever fandom, along with everyone rightly pointing out that even for us who got to watch it it was still a tiny side character… I mean Disney is still at the stage of what they did with Beauty and the Beast’s ~canonical gay character~ 

So yeah… that’s thrown back to TV and smaller movies to lead the way and because the generations showing most likely the real global percentages but actually just the young western world stats on queerness in any form (like… 25% instead of 1% or whatever and that’s STILL probably too low) are still teens to young adults. The previous gayest generation above them are still just arriving in power and settling in, and the excellent changes we already have from the generation before that is what we are seeing now... But given THEIR cultural context, even their best can still seem to younger eyes, moderate and not generally placing queer characters in lead roles except in niche or indie or otherwise “acceptable” places to take those risks. I think change is always coming and culturally each generation being more open and accepting that the last is really making changes and so on, hopefully things WILL change rapidly and what was the common state of affairs in the sort of indie media I consumed as a teen will be the mainstream soon because a lot of those creators 10 years later are kicking off… 

All that said, TV in the mainstream is still controlled by Mark Pedowitz types exercising their power over the Bobos who have their Wayward Sisters pitches with the clearly labelled main character for the main teen demographic being queer. The culture is very much that we’re now pretty open and can happily have queer characters, but the main characters are still largely held separate. A good example is Riverdale, which is on the CW, a newer show with writers such as Britta Lundin, who is young, queer, and wrote a novel blatantly based on being a Destiel shipper and fan interacting with the cast and crew in fandom spaces, and whose first solo episode of Riverdale featured a looooot of the gay stuff (yay). 

But while she’s a story editor and writer for the show and can use it as a platform for writing stories for its audience using a whole range of canonically queer characters, the show still keeps all 4 of its mains at a strict remove from this. Cheryl can come out as a lesbian in the second season after a lil ho yay in the first but no clearly marked storyline about her identity, but even though Betty and Veronica kissed in the first episode it was blatant fan service (for Cheryl in-story, lol) and mostly just set the tone that they are the sort of seemingly straight girls kissing for attention while having strong romantic or physical attraction to guys. In the second season the kiss comes up again in joking that Jughead and Archie are the only ones of the main 4 who haven’t kissed, Archie gets one planted on him by a dude as a “judas kiss” moment of betrayal in season 3 and he and Jug are teased that they were expected to get together because they were close but in the same sort of homophobic undercurrent tones as early Destiel snarking from side characters, seemingly less about their relationship and more to unsettle them with implications… I mean it was a complicated moment but in the long run it didn’t seem entirely pleasant to me, especially given the overall emotional state they were in and later plot etc etc. (My mum is 1000% invested in Riverdale now as a former Archie Comics reader as a kid so this is now my life too as I was in the room when my brother callously exposed her to it, hi :P) 

Anyway that’s just one case study but aside from SPN it’s probably the most mainstream teen demographic thing I watch… Other examples would be things like B99 which had Rosa come out as bi and that’s awesome, and made us all cry a lot, but Jake, the clear main character even in a very strong and well-treated ensemble, has a great deal of bi subtext, there’s no way given Andy Samberg’s apparent habit of ad-libbing MORE progressive jokes that he’d ever be intentionally harming people if that’s how his brain works (you know, like other people quick-fire offensive stuff from their mouth working faster than brain sense of humour :P). But at the same time for all Jake’s quipping about crushes and such and the fact the show clearly knows how to be sensitive to bisexuality with Stephanie Beatriz being a strong advocate, just because Jake’s the main character and adorably married to Amy. In NO WAY can that be threatened because they’re SO GOOD, so there’s STILL uncertainty that this will pay off in the same special episode “I love my wife but I am bi” kinda way that seems obvious that could just be said. We all carry on without it affecting anything because obviously Jake’s found his soulmate so we don’t mess with that but they should know it’s important to clarify it… Even with B99′s track record, I’m nervous solely because Jake’s the main character and main characters tend not to get self-exploratory arcs about latent queerness and ESPECIALLY not if they’re happily married. If ANY show was going to do it right and trailblaze in this exact era it would be them, but… gyah :P 

Anyway I guess the conclusion right now is that the more mainstream you are the more uncertain it feels, but we are right at that cliff edge, especially with shows putting in SOME of the work. If B99 doesn’t get us there (or the Good Place where they’ll happily confirm Eleanor is bi in interviews but I believe she hasn’t said it outright on the show despite clearly showing attraction to female characters, again, the denials we know so well in SPN fandom reflect a wider audience view of dismissing this stuff as jokes and not reflective of character feeling and identification without a Special Episode dedicated to confirming it >.>) then we’re very clearly on the cusp of SOME mainstream or massively well-known show doing it at least once in a meaningful way that has an Ellen-style cultural impact on TV writing. 

Let’s make it a goal for 2019 or 2020, and hope that a NEW show with a canonically queer main from the start is pitched and becomes a mainstream hit in the next 5… Still got a ways to go before Disney level mainstream but again there IS work going pushing the envelope, especially if we get a movie of a franchise such as idk Further Legends of Korra, or Steven Universe or something else that’s massively pushed the envelope with sexuality or gender for their main character on the small screen in the experimental petri dish they’ve had there for children’s TV. Something that would force Disney to blink about a lesbian princess or Star Wars to let Finn and Poe kiss or Marvel to let Steve and Bucky hold hands or something in order to remain relevant.

Once the Big Cultural Monoliths get in on it, I expect culture as a whole to first of all react quickly on the small screen, but honestly I’ve been waiting for them to snap pretty much my whole life since adolescence and they’re taking such wee tiny baby steps, and some factors are enormous geopolitical awfulness, that the story as a whole is unpredictable and we can only really hope that things don’t slow down. 

(Where this affects SPN is just impossible to say right now, given its almost unique position in this mess due to longevity vs fandom vs almost entirely new generation of writers’ room) 

[har-rison-s]

My MARVEL Journey

A/N: Hi, yes. No one answered if they'd like to hear/read it, but I will put it here anyways. It's long, it's very long. But I hope you read this. This brought me to tears. Enjoy.

My first Marvel-related memory was probably when Captain America: The First Avenger came out. A picture of Steve Rogers shirtless was in the magazine and I laughed at it. I don’t remember the particular reason, but something about ‘who the hell’s going to go see this movie? only because of the shirtless guy, i’m sure’. Yes, yes, Rūta, you’re sure.

It was 2012 and the movie Avengers had come out. Me and my dad were sitting in a cafeteria, looking at the small printed repertoire of the nearest cinema, wanting to see Avengers. But, alas, I was too young. I was only eleven at the time and the movie had an age restriction, 12+. Made me a bit confused and I was often told I look older than I am, but dad didn’t want to break any rules. So, we went home.

I don’t know when exactly this was, but we were at home and I was doing something on my own, dad was in his room and I heard that he was watching a movie. So I ran up the stairs to see what he was watching. The Avengers. 

I sat down next to him, having no idea what was happening in the movie, and watched a fragment of the movie with him. At the time, I really liked Chris Hemsworth and Thor, one of my first celebrity crushes. So dad asked me “You like that Thor guy, right?” At which I smiled and said yes. Eleven-year-old me, oh my god, that is so funny to me now. 

When Iron Man 3 came out, I was thankfully above the restricted age and dad took me to the cinema to see Iron Man 3. My english wasn’t that good then, so I understood like 40% of what everyone was saying. But I remember liking the movie a lot, it felt fresh and new and I really liked the humor and Tony and Harley’s interactions. Towards the end of May 2013, at some point I had drawn Iron Man’s hand with the light and showed it to my dad. He liked it so much that he took a photo and posted it to his Instagram. Or was that 2014? I actually can’t remember.

Then, sometime later in the year, we went to see Thor: The Dark World. One of MCU’s worst movies, but at the time I liked it, cause, of course, I liked Loki and Thor a lot, and their actors. 

That’s when I think my involvement with Marvel really started. I used to draw Loki and Thor in my notebooks, save photos and memes of them in my first touch-screen phone and put them as wallpapers. There was one really good drawing of Loki I did, I think I still have it somewhere. But really, for my drawing skills at 12-years-old, it was exceptionally good. His face was very detailed and similar to the real photo. 

I used to watch a lot of videos of Tom Hiddleston and Chris Hemsworth on my laptop, I had so many photos of them saved, and I used to watch Thor: the Dark World and Avengers all the time, not understanding a thing or what’s happening, what’s the storyline. All I knew is that I loved Loki and he was my first favourite Marvel character. Some time passed until I got more in depth with his character. I was young and silly, okay? Forgive me.

Next thing, I found out my classmate also liked Loki and the MCU movies. I was happy I found someone with the same interest, a bit unhappy that it wasn’t my best friend. But I knew she’d come around, and I had my fun. 

Spring 2014 came around and me and my dad were going to New York City. My god, I couldn’t wait. I’d wanted to go there since I could remember. Around the time we went there, the press tour for Captain America: The Winter Soldier had started and I had thrown Marvel to the side a little. 

Me and my dad went to a comic book store in NYC, not so far from Central Station, because he wanted to look for Transformer comics and I wanted to find a Loki comic for my classmate. The comic shop was small, but god was it cool. It had very steap stairs, you had to climb them to get there. And they were narrow and someone wanted to come down when we were going up, so it was quite uncomfortable. But the comic store was heaven for me.

It had action figures, pop! toys with the bobby heads, Mjlonir!!! and Loki’s helmet!! and Cap’s shield!! In actual life size. That was cool. There were toys from CATWS, and I told dad “Oh, the new Captain America movie is coming out sometime around now.” cause I remember seeing it on twitter and seeing a snippet of the trailer. I marvelled at the toys, looking at them. Natasha, Steve, the Winter Soldier, Falcon, Nick Fury. It was very exciting. There were probably other promotional things except for the toys, but I didn’t see them (or just don’t remember them). 

Dad got his transformer comic, and I got my Loki comics, and we left. I think we spent from 30 minutes to an hour there. No regrets. 

A week, I think, after returning from NYC, me and my best friend went to see Captain America: the Winter Soldier. I still didn’t quite know what was happening, but I remember seeing the trailer and thinking ‘how epic is this!! some mysterious guy, cap looking very attractive, natasha having a great haircut, i’m excited!!’. And that’s where the real ‘trouble’ began. 

I saw Bucky and Steve’s friendship somehow, for an unknown reason, very similar to my own, with my friend. I don’t know why, it just seemed so familiar, so well-known. None of us have been brainwashed and made an assasin, but I think already then we shared the same deep connection as Steve and Bucky and we still do. Maybe that’s why I saw a familiarity there - I’d do anything, go against anyone for my best friend, just like Steve did for Bucky. 

I had so many pictures of Chris Evans, Sebastian Stan and Scarlett Johansson in my phone, I changed my wallpaper every other day, very often. I watched their previous, non-marvel movies all the time. And then Scarlett’s “Lucy” came out and me and my best friend watched it in poor quality on my iPhone 4. We also watched CATWS in poor quality on my iPhone 4. How could we do that?? On such a small screen?? Was desparation the reason? Who knows. 

Anyways, I was obssessed with Marvel then. Couldn’t wait for the next Avengers and Captain America movies, didn’t even know what they’d be about. Then, I had started to see into the characters and my english had improved, so I started to understad everything better.

I remember one evening after seeing CATWS, we spent like 30 euros on groceries to make dinner and spend some time together, and we were making that dinner and then watching the first Captain America movie. It was one of the best nights of my life.

Spring 2014 is still the favourite time of my life, because it gave me so much. So many new people, characters, discoveries, books, travels, friends, etc. I loved that period in my life, all of the first half of 2014. If I could travel in time, I would go and live in that time for as long as I could, being the same age as I was then. I wouldn’t necessarily want to live there as myself like I am now, I’d like to be as young and weird as I was then. 

Every spring, I am reminded of 2014’s spring. The smell of fresh rain plus the smell of blooming lilac and lingon. The music I listened to then, the places I was at most often then, the smells and feelings of spring. It’s interesting that spring reminds me of that particular year’s spring, not other years. It is somehow best settled in my memories and my heart. 

I will say that Captain America: the Winter Soldier changed my life. It did, and it’s not an exaggaration. This movie and the characters and the actors provided something of an escape for me. From what? I don’t know, really, but they were my home. Made me feel accepted. And I started to connect with people on Instagram and Tumblr through Marvel and it gave me a community I was accepted in, I was finally a part of. I hadn’t found that kind of thing until then. I hadn’t found a place for myself until I discovered the Marvel fanbase. And it’s the best fandom I’ve ever been a part of, the most true and loving and accepting and understanding people. The only haters in the fanbase are the directors and script-writers for the movies ;)

2014 was a very colorful year for me, my interests changed and came and went, but Marvel was a constant interest for me. It was always there, always somewhere on the side. I got a Captain America beanie and a shirt for Christmas, from my dad. Still one of my favourite Christmas gifts ever.

2015 had come around and I had changed as a person, a lot, and I wouldn’t say for the better. I was very stuck on something, stuck in an unlikable version of myself, and it was strange suddenly to communicate and be with people around, in groups. But I managed. I got a Captain America wallet for my 14th birthday that year. And I still have it, although it’s broken and wore-down, but now I have another Marvel wallet. 

There was a youth film jury thing happening on a May Sunday, which was also the day me and my dad went to see Avengers: Age of Ultron. I agree, not one of Marvel’s best movies, but I liked it. The movie was funny, full of love and action, and very… discovering, as well. The movie showed each character’s fears and doubts about themselves, what they think is the worst about themselves. And that’s a strong move, to show the heroes’ weaknesses. I’ve always liked that. When a movie/tv show shows the main character’s real personality, their weaknesses, fears, the things that make them human, just like me. And it means a lot. To know that heroes like Natasha Romanoff, a genius phylanthropist like Tony Stark, a super-man like Steve Rogers and a god like Thor have a weak spot and are still humans, that they still feel what regular people do. 

The similarities I can draw between myself and Steve Rogers, for example, is a) having a skill for motivational speeches, b) crossing borders and breaking rules for our best friend, c) standing by what we believe in and not giving into anyone, d) we’ll do what we have to, even if everyone else says it’s wrong, but we know it’s not. The similarities between myself and Tony Stark are a) we’re both geniuses in some ways, b) we’re geniuses who can’t sleep, c) we’re geniuses who are overlooked by most people, what we do for ourselves and for others, our friends and family is overlooked and unnoticed by others, d) we know what’s the right thing to do, e) we’re capable of more than we think (I hope). 

I don’t think I have any similarities with Thor or Hawkeye or Banner. With Natasha… I just might. We’re both secretive about ourselves, about what’s happening inside, about what we’re hurting. Also we both know what we have to do, we also know that if we don’t do it, nobody else would. We both make sacrifices.

Age of Ultron was a fun time, it was some sort of highlight of the journey, well, one of the highlights. So many funny videos, so many interviews and events and comic con panels. Oh, and the credits of the movie! The sculpture of the Avengers and Ultron and his soldiers was so beautiful, I loved it. Still one of my favourite MCU credits.

Never around that time, or in 2014, or in 2013, had I thought that the Avengers movies would end at some point. Sure, I thought about the Captain America franchise - how many movies can you make? What are the Avengers going to do in the next movie? You know, stuff like that, but I never gave it more thought than that. My mind never really went there. I was too hyped about the movies coming out constantly, I was excited and couldn’t wait for each movie. My best friend reminded me on the night of Endgame premiere how she recalls me being so excited for every new movie Marvel had coming out, I think I can remember hyping the movies up, ranting happily and just being giddy and over-all excited, telling her my opinions and stuff, you know, like a true fan. 

At the end of 2015, the trailer for Captain America: Civil War had come out. And the excitement grew, cause you know I’d see Steve and Bucky together again. I couldn’t wait!! 

And, of course, you had to choose either if you were Team Iron Man or Team Cap, before the fans even knew what was happening. All you knew was that Steve and Tony were indifferent. Well, they couldn’t show more, otherwise they would spoil the whole plot. 

I was literally the only one who was on Team Cap in all my class and my friends, everybody else was on Team Iron Man. But, you know, as our dear friend Steve Rogers, I stood my ground and didn’t falter. Captain was always my favourite and I was more a fan of him than any other Avenger. You know, when you’ve been a fan of Captain America for three years, you can’t choose  Team Iron Man. 

Even my best friend was Team Iron Man. One day, we were staying in line at the school cafeteria and she just said “You know, but Steve is old.” Which is one hell of an argument, I laughed in ehr face and could still do it. It’s just so funny. Yeah, okay, Tony wasn’t frozen in the ice for 70 years, but it’s no argument. 

We went to see CACW on the same day we tried the black face mask for the first time. Our faces were extremely red, no matter how much make-up we put on. But I think it went off after a while. We went to the premiere, it was the first time we were in the new SCAPE auditorium. It was h u g e, the biggest 3D auditorium in the Baltic countries. I think it was the first time it was opened or at least the first week, I don’t know, maybe that’s incorrect, but I hadn’t been there before. We sat in the middle, and there was a girl with a Cap t-shirt next to us, and turned out my best friend knew her somehow, but I don’t know about that. 

It was honestly, a whole experience. While the movie meant a lot to me emotionally, CACW as well as CATWS were comic book movies as much as they were political thrillers. Brilliantly done, perfect actors, good plots and turns and twists, great characters, cinematography = brilliant, the music = well written and fitting to all characters and their storylines. 

I went to Civil War with one of my best friends, who is also my neighbour, and as strange as it seems since we’ve been friends since 2008, that was the first and only (yet) time we went to a movie together. And we were texting before the movie and talking about which tram to take and I asked her which team she’s on, of course, expecting her to be on Team Iron Man as everyone else. But she wasn’t! Finally someone on Team Cap!! I was so happy, haha. I was glad I wasn’t alone. It was cool, going to the movies with her. And it was only two days after I first saw CACW. 

2016 was also the year Batman vs Superman came out, and Suicide Squad. BvS didn’t suck as much as SS did. God, it couldn’t live up to the hype. But I liked Batman vs Superman, I really liked the movie. I saw it twice, once with my best friend and once with my dad. I also saw Civil War twice in the theater, but altogether I’ve seen the movie probably about 200 times. It’s meditative to me, and each time I watch it, I spot something new in the charaters and the storyline. I watch it when I’m sick, when I’m at home and lazying around. I love it. Probably one of my favourite Marvel movies.

Later in May 2016, my classmate was calling me and asking if I wanted an Iron Man shirt. “It’s red, it’s big, wait, I’ll send you a picture”. So she did and I said ‘yes, of course’! It cost me five or six euros, but it was original Marvel merchandise that she bought in a second-hand shop. 

In 2016 I also saw Doctor Strange. It was in November or October, I can’t place exactly, but I know I was going alone. The first Marvel movie I saw alone in the movie theater. And I was running late, as well. It was raining, but I made it in time. And it was again a premiere. I loved the movie. My classmate asked me “yo Rūta have you seen that Dr Strange movie yet?” I was like “yes, of course, it’s a Marvel movie, I went to the premiere”. I was like that back in the day, acting like it’s, you know, evident and a fact that I see all the Marvel movies immediately as they’ve come out (which I did). Anyway, I said yes and she was like “oh well were the directors on drugs? cause we saw it and the movie was so trippy, felt like lsd”. I was like…. “well, I don’t know how to tell you, but the movie’s based on comics and in the comics, as in the movie, there’s the idea of multiple universes and dimensions and what they’d look like, and I think what they showed in the movie would be quite accurate in real life if we could travel to these dimensions. The movie is meant to twist your mind and make you believe the impossible is possible and that we’re not alone in this life, we’re not alone in our environment. So it’s not meant to be trippy, but it’s meant to show you how misticism is combined with intelligence and the modern world.” Her answer was something like “oh, okay. but it’s still trippy.” It annoyed me a bit, but you know it’s okay, she doesn’t completely understand cause she’s not a fan. So it’s whatever, it’s cool.

2017 had begun and I was on a bit of a pause, it was my last year of secondary school and I had also discovered the Beatles and they changed me as a person, as well. I had emotional and existential discoveries within myself from them, but that’s not what this is about.

Me and my best friend had drifted apart a bit, so I started to hang out with other girls in my class, and they were very accepting and they were cool to spend time with. One of them, now my Marvel friend and one of my best friends, as well, also liked Marvel and had for some time. So we became closer friends and went to see Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2. She really likes the Guardians, because she likes humor and the comedy genre, but I’m not the biggest fan of those. GOTG2 had George Harrison on its soundtrack. Harrison is one of the few loves of my life and my favourite singer, my favourite person. I was hyped to hear him in the movie, and it was in the perfect situation. To my friend, I was a bit too hyped.

Then, summer, me and my other friend went to see Spider-Man: Homecoming. I was very excited to see this movie, I had waited a year for the new Spider-Man story to be told, and I wanted to see how he’d be portrayed by this youngster, Tom Holland, who came to be one of my idols. 

His story is truly inspiring. Spider-Man was his favourite superhero growing up and he had wanted to be an actor. He trained in ballet, in gymnastics, and that gives him the ability to not have a stunt-man for his Spider-Man role. His abilities, all in all, are incredible. And he’s achieved his dreams, fans have helped him and they mean a lot to him. We mean a lot to him, we’ve helped him achieve this dream. 

SM:HOCO was a good movie, and I liked it a lot. It was the year I’d start high school, and I had always felt like Peter Parker. You know, out-casted, one friend, but smart and a bit awkward. I can still see the biggest similarities between myself and Parker. I remember thinking, when I started high school, “Oh I’m definitely like Peter Parker”. And I was, I still am, kind of. I’m not as smart as him, and I can’t shoot spider webs or climb plane walls or lift buses. But I see a lot of myself in him. How he tries hard, but nobody sees it, tries to help everyone, but gives problems instead (without wanting to), wants to go on every adventure. He has a person that he’s trying to prove himself to, but he’s never enough in their eyes, that is also something I often feel. And that he, an outcast at school and a supposable nobody can be a world-saving hero, means a lot as well, and speaks highly to me.

Fall 2017, high school and thinking everything’s fine and that I’m doing good. I meet my Marvel friend and we have a bite together and then go to see Thor: Ragnarok in the theater. If I remember correctly, it was the 30th of October. 

I was so happy to see Thor and Loki on a screen together again that I shed tears of joy. They started my Marvel journey and it meant a lot to see them finally, for some moments, not fighting each other, but fighting along side together. And Taika Waititi did a great job for the movie and for Thor’s character, proving that he can still be the God of Thunder without his hammer. The movie was incredible, one of the best the MCU has. We laughed, we cried, we had a great time. One of my favourite days.

Project time came around, we had o make a scientific research about a topic we were interested in. To say it shortly, the process and result wasn’t pleasant, so, on Friday February the 16th, me and my Marvel went to see Black Panther - a spontanious idea, and it was the day it came out, so we made it just in time. My dear friend got a bit lost in the area around the cinema, but I helped her get here. We promised each other that next time we’ll go there together so she doesn’t get lost. 

She bought us M&M’s (which we succesfully threw to the ground while the movie was playing) and popcorn. I still have both packets in my room somewhere. I kept them because it made me remember one of the best days of my life. I was feeling horrible that day and meeting her and seeing Black Panther put me in an ecstatic mood, I got much happier. So yes, these movies and characters do save my life, and so do my friends.

Black Panther was a big breakthrough for people of colour and women, which is great and I love that. It got, I think, at least one Oscar and Golden Globe. They deserve it. And Ryan Coogler is a great director. I loved the movie, it was so beautiful and nothing was out of order, I’d literally give it a 10/10. 

Then, I started my Marvel movie marathon because Infinity War was coming. I remember sometime in summer 2017 or fall 2017 the trailer leaked and I didn’t want to watch it, but I did. And when it officially came out, I had forgot the leaked one. 

My Marvel movie marathon went well, and I watched Ant-Man and Ant-Man and the Wasp for the first time. Now that I watch it a year later, I can say that AMATW is one of MCU’s best movies. It’s so well done. But anyways, it was so strange watching all the movies I watched when I had just started my Marvel journey. Infinity War was the beginning of the end of this incredible story, and it was very emotional.

When I was watching the first Thor, I accidentally spilled tea on my laptop, so it was a bit of a disaster, but the laptop is fine now. I dried it and continued to watch Thor. How silly of me, now that I think of it.

Then, one fine sunday the sun was out and me and my Marvel friend were meeting up to spend the day together. Mom was at work, so we were alone and we decided to watch Thor: Ragnarok again. We drank Cola with lime and watched the movie, had a good time. It was such a good day, again, one of my favourites. 

April 26th, 2018. The day we went to see Infinity War—it was an unspoken rule that we’re going to every Marvel movie together—I’d had an emotional day already and was quite spent. We met up at the mall and I hadn’t finished watching Black Panther, the last movie on my marathon’s list. So we watched it at the mall, on a sofa. We had an hour to go and I don’t think we finished watching Black Panther till the end. 

Well, Infinity War… wow. That was, uh, that was something. I remember how hard we cried. I remember how many tissues we used. I remember how we walked out of the theater, into the night, and we just… we didn’t know what to do. I tried to make up some theories about all the deaths, tried to find something positive, tried to find a way out of it all. But I couldn’t. And my friend was too sad to listen to my ramblings. We were broken. 

The next few weeks were hard for me, I’d say the month of May was hard for me. Not only because of Infinity War, but it was a big reason. I don’t want to talk about the other reasons. But, it was hard to find strength to carry on, it was hard to live without those characters. I mean, Steve had then lost Bucky twice before his eyes. And I couldn’t understand how they could do that. Twice, I mean, t w i c e ??? Blows my mind.

And Peter. That broke me so deep I still don’t know if it has fixed. Right in front of Tony’s eyes. It was… something I couldn’t comprehend, as well. And I prayed to myself that Steve doesn’t go, that Tony doesn’t go, that Sam doesn’t go. For a while, I was relieved that Steve and Tony didn’t get ‘dusted’, but I couldn’t bare the actual deaths.

I didn’t go to see Ant-Man and the Wasp that summer. I don’t know why, maybe it just slipped. The opportunity slipped. But I don’t know. My friend did, she saw it and said it’s very good. Now, I don’t take other people’s opinions into account in order to watch a movie or before I do, I like to not hear anything about a movie before I watch it. But she was right about this one. 

2018 was also a colorful and adventurous year for me, so Infinity War was one of the main events that impacted my life that year. I swore that I wouldn’t watch it again, at least not in 2018. And I did. I only watched it for a second time on January 1st this year and right before Endgame. The movie is good, and epic, as well, but I just can’t watch it as many times as I do the other MCU movies. 

In November or December came the first teaser for Avengers: Endgame and we finally got the title. It was very emotional, a very dark trailer with no space for hope. I shed a few tears and thought “i’m not ready for this”. I was not.

Captain Marvel came around and at first I thought I’d wait and watch it at home, but then I got five cinema gift cards for my birthday and realised I could use one to see Captain Marvel. So I did, I bought my ticket and went to the premiere.

It was a very emotional evening because I had lost my wallet and someone had stolen it. So I ran around the streets, looking for it, and I was soon going to be late for my movie. So I ran to the cinema, crying all the time, and sat down in my seat.

The movie was amazing, I just couldn’t fully enjoy it because I was thinking about my wallet and hoping that someone had found it and gave to the authorities, hoping that I’d get it back somehow, someday. Well, I didn’t, but I got myself a new wallet and eventually stopped crying about the lost one.

Captain Marvel was truly incredible and unpredictable at moments. As much as some people think it was a feminist movie, it was not produced that way and not meant that way. It was meant to show Carol’s origin story, her own feelings and confusion and doubts towards who she is and how she fights for what’s right. I loved the movie, it was truly a masterpiece.

Teasers and trailers started coming out for Endgame and the press tour soon started and I engaged myself fully with it all, followed tags and profiles that I could get updates from. 

It brought tears to my eyes to see Robert, Scarlett, Chrises, Ruffalo and Renner experience all the fun, all the love and the press tour for the last time. And then there’s Brie Larson who experiences it all for the first time. There was this video where someone said something to Brie and she got shy, started crying and put her head on Downey’s shoulder and he laid a kiss on her head. It was just sweet and well, because Downey knows how one can get shy of the compliments and attention and he’s been through it all, and he’s the one who started it all. So he sees Brie is still not used to what it all means and he knows he can give her the comfort. It’s just… giving me indescribable emotions and tears.

24th of April, 2019. The day I saw Endgame was such a great day. It was warm and sunny, even hot at times. I rode my bike back and forth over Daugava, listened to music and sang while riding, enjoyed the sun and some food. I was happy. Then, my Marvel friend had forgot she was supposed to be at the cinema by 19:10, so I called her and she tried to get there as soon as she could. Once I was inside the auditorium, I started stressing, I started panicking. It really hit me that my journey, our journey, their journey was coming to an end. This would be the last Avengers movie where they are all together, fighting together and talking and you know, Avengers stuff. It registered in my brain, although I don’t think it fully has now, actually. I started crying, I started to breath heavily and my friend wouldn’t come, I didn’t know where she was. I had prepared a gift for her that originally I planned to give her on her name day, but this was too much of a big event for us both. She had already seen Endgame at the night premiere, but we keep our promise to see all Marvel movies together. Well, we kinda fell out with that, but still. 

Our friendship wasn’t born solely from Marvel, but that was one of the basics. And she means so much to me, I can’t even describe. She’s been through the last phase of Avengers with me and she, maybe a bit more than my best best friend, has seen me change and seen the impact the characters have on me with time, how they’ve helped me, helped shaped me as a person.

She won in the quiz about Marvel and got a huge poster, bigger than herself, and socks as a prize. Socks she gave to me, they’re comfy, but made for men. Still, I wear them, what’s the difference, really? Feet are feet :D

I cried so much during Endgame. It was a painful movie, an ending to something so wonderful, and I still can’t bear it. I don’t think I’ll ever watch it again, but I think I’ll buy the DVD when it comes out and watch it at home at some point. As much as I’d never forgive myself for not seeing the credits again (because they were beautiful), I can’t watch it again. I’d have a breakdown.

I actually already did. Before the movie, after the movie (several), during the movie. Especially when everyone came back. Cause I thought that’s how Steve was gonna go - alone against Thanos with his broken shield. But then everyone came back and I had a… I called it “a positive anxiety attack”. I was happy, I was relieved, but I was stressed and in panic and I was glad and I was… Ah, just everything at once. I was sobbing and breathing heavily again, I was… I was at a strange condition.

There are so many wrongs made in Endgame with the characters, as well as plot-holes simply dismissed. But in my view, it was a better movie than Infinity War. It’s the most epic superhero movie ever made. There won’t ever be a better one made.

Three days after seeing Endgame, I took part in an MCU Quiz with my friend. We got third place! I’m very happy about that, it means a lot to me. We got a mug, a poster and a comic book which I’ve yet to read and share with her. That was truly amazing, I have to thank Kino Kults for the amazing experience and gifts. 

Endgame drew a part of my life which I love as much as my family to a close. It concluded a chapter, locked it closed with a key. And I still can’t come to terms with it, I still can’t realise it fully, I still can’t comprehend. That along with every fan and every actor and producer that has been a part of the MCU, my Marvel story and journey has ended. Well, I actually hope it hasn’t. There’s lots to look forward to, but the Avengers… no more.

I’ve spent a lot of money on Marvel, merchandise and souvenirs, and I don’t regret a single cent. Movie tickets, comics, posters, phone cases, necklaces, rings, keychains, shirts and hoodies. I’ve made original merchandise (for myself only) as well, and I think that’s very cool. I have my own idea and I make it happen. I’ve made art, I’ve made my own notebook and book covers with Marvel characters on them that I use in school, I’ve customized boxes and folders with Marvel themes. I have two self-customized shirts, two self-customized hoodies, and three or four merchandise shirts from Marvel. I’ve had joggers, pyjama pants, etc. I still have my beanie and I use it from time to time, I wear my clothes proudly. 

The people who are a part fo the MCU that have inspired and impacted me the most are Scarlett Johansson, Robert Downey Jr, Chris Evans, Sebastian Stan, Tom Holland and Tom Hiddleston. Their stories, their personalities, their motivations, their characters have given me so much, they’ve taught me so much about life and about myself, as well. They’ve brought me where I am now. I couldn’t be here without them, I couldn’t be who I am without them. Without all of the actors and characters, actually.

If I could have any way to thank them, any way to reach the actors and talk to them, I would be so thankful. If I’d meet at least one of them, well, it would be a dream come true. They’re all still alive and if I had any opportunity to get to a Con, a meet and greet, or simply meet them accidentally, I would use it. It’s my dream to talk to them, to see them in real life. I’d give anything for that to come true. 

This journey has been absolutely incredible. I’ve made new friends through Marvel, made artworks, had ideas, discovered music, discovered artists, discovered new things about myself and others. When I had nothing, I had Marvel and their movies and characters. They gave me hope when I couldn’t. They made me believe in myself when I didn’t have the strength to and nobody else would.

Marvel, you have been my life and my home for the past seven years. O cannot ever thank you enough. You’ve given me so much. I’m so glad I was here, I was on board while all the movies came out. They shaped my childhood, my adolescence and made me into who I am today. I can’t believe the avengers’ journey is over. It never really will be. For me, at least. They’ll live forever in my heart, in the fans’ hearts and in cinematic and culture history. 

Thank you, Marvel. Thank you, Robert Downey Jr. Thank you, Chris Evans. Thank you, Avengers. I love you 3000. 

[lhaewiel]

Watership Down (2018): the review no one asked for

But the review I am going to do anyway because of all the feels.

Premise

Not so many of you know that I LOVE Watership Down to bits. The book has been a huge presence in my life and I have read it countless times. Especially during the times where I was hopeless and those times where I nearly let myself go into dangerous areas like suicide, I would read the book and it would console me.

This is also a huge memory from my mum, who passed away, and this book was handed to me by her. This book is a huge deal for me and this is also why I am doing this today.

I have seen also the 1978 animated adaptation and I’ve seen the 1999 animated series. I will talk briefly about them in a few moments.

I will keep the rest under the Read More, as this will be long.

Without further ado, I’ll start the review.

The book

As mentioned, the book is a huge deal for me. The story, besides the already mentioned emotional hang on me, is a very interesting one. It tackles themes like the fear of changing, the dangers of the unknown, plus the dangers of a regime, there’s a bit of environmentalism and it’s overall well written and a 11/10 would recommend.

It is a story about growth.

It is told from the point of view of wild rabbits, which is unusual. Richard Adams, the writer, is passionate about the subject and has read/consulted/conducted studies on wild rabbits, their language and their behaviour before writing this masterpiece. There are notes and explanations and every chapter starts with a literary quote that hints on what the chapter is about - and I sometimes propose this structure when writing down my fics.

Anyway.

I was really happy to see the 1978 adaptation, although not completely satisfied, and I also watched the animated series, which deviates a ,lot, but creates an interesting storyline and I would love a reboot of it at a certain point in time. I was not particularly thrilled at the beginning, but then it grew on me and this series is a beloved of mine.

The 2018 adaptation: the five stages of grief

I have written, in these two days, a lot of comments, which I will be listing here as FYI. They illustrate perfectly how I feel overall about the 2018 movie.

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 /  12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16 / 17 / 18 / 19 / 20 / 21 / 22 / 23 / 24 / 25 / 26 / 27 / 28 / 29 / 30 / 31 / 32 / 33 / 34 / 35

For the full comprehension of how fucking livid I am I suggest you read the comments above, they are all one-liners, quick to read and easy to understand.

I think, as mentioned above, this movie has made me pass through the 5 stages of grief and I think I’m still processing part of it. The problem, I think, it’s because this whole miniseries was 99.9% aimed at those who don’t know anything about the book, or the 1978 adaptation, or the 1999 series. As a standalone piece, without the knowledge of anything prior to this, the movie can be considered good.

But, considering that Watership Down is a niche work and not so many know about it, the whole fanbase is made of people who know this work and any adaptation by heart - trust me, this is not a huge fandom, it’s not DC or Marvel, it’s something you need to have read about previously because otherwise you wouldn’t know anything about it. We are the same 15 people in this fandom - let’s call it fandom ok?

I barely missed this because this new series was not even advertised and I did not miss it because 1. I am a huge nerd and b. I LOVE WATERSHIP DOWN.

So to say, the 99.9% of people don’t know about Watership Down, the 0.1% does, therefore only the 0.1% is watching this movie, which is not aimed at this 0.1%, but at the 99.9% who knows nothing. Of course there will be backlash. Of course there will be discourse. The 99.9% of people who know nothing will look at the 0.1% in the discourse and go “WTF, this movie is amazing!” and the 0.1% will probably yell “GO READ THE BOOK!” and there will be more discourse. Well done. Slow clap to BBC and Netflix. SARCASM.

*inhales*

To be honest, there were moments where I liked the movie, and I am going to go more into detail now.

What I liked

I want to give props for the cast chosen to voice the characters. I mean, Peter Capaldi, John Boyega and everyone else? I am pretty satisfied with the choices and I think the voices compliment each other really well.

I do like the soundtrack and the songs. I mean, “Bright eyes” by Simon and Garfunkel is iconic, but “Fire on fire” gives more atmosphere to the whole series.

I do like the animation a lot, I like the scenery and the various shifts. The warren of the snares was something out of a horror movie and I loved it, I think the scenes were created very well. Fiver’s visions were well rendered and Efrafa actually gave me chills on how it was rendered better than the other adaptations.

I liked Strawberry, she was very sweet and I guess I can see why they chose to make them a doe instead of a buck. Oh and the relationship between Dandelion and Hawkbit, and Blueberry and Blackberry, that was gold.

Unfortunately here it ends.

What I disliked

The overall OOC of the characters. Like, Hazel questions his abilities, but he is charismatic and is a born leader and this is why everyone follows him. He’s respected and the sentence “My Chief Rabbit told me to defend this burrow” is said by Bigwig out of pure and sincere respect for Hazel and the Efrafans literally shit themselves.

Ah, Bigwig. Yes, he’s big, he’s angry, but he’s also POLITE, with a HEART OF GOLD, and YES HE GETS FRUSTRATED, but he’s always RESPECTFUL and APOLOGISES. I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS FOR BIGWIG OKAY?

THEY DECIDED TO MAKE KEHAAR A HUGE JERK, when in fact he loves those rabbits to bits and never thinks twice about defending them. Also YOU BLOODY COWARDS, KEHAAR DOES NOT SPEAK THE RABBITS LANGUAGE, THERE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A HUGE LANGUAGE BARRIER AND BIGWIG TEACHING KEHAAR TO SPEAK THE RABBITS LANGUAGE YOU

FOOLS

THE “BIG WATER” IS ACTUALLY SOMEWHERE AROUND THE BALTIC AREA YOU

DOUBLE FOOLS

*inhales*

You cut off the whole boat scene. THAT WAS A FUCKING PLOT POINT!! What was the point of showing that the rabbits could use a piece of floating junk to cross a river if then this was not employed later on?! The whole plan of actually make it out of Efrafa was created around that boat you

TRIPLE FOOLS

The plan was for Bigwig and the does + Blackavar to reach the bridge next to which Efrafa was built, jump in the boat and FLEE, leaving Woundworth and his Owsla so surprised they would not even have the mental and physical strength to follow Hazel, Bigwig & co. any further.

Also, during the Siege you cut off the scene where Fiver gets possessed by El-ahrairah and makes the Efrafans Shit Themselves Pt. 2

And what was the point of showing that Dandelion was the Flash of the rabbits, if he didn’t make the dog run after him to bring mayhem and destruction to the Efrafans?

Anyway, most of my commentary is linked above.

I also noticed the overusage of terms in rabbit language. If someone is not a fan of the series, they would not understand terms like “flayara”, “hrairoo”, “Tzorn”, “silflay hraka”, “Fu-Inlé” etc. You could have put some note at the bottom of the screen, like Lord of the Rings did with Elvish and Dwarvish.

Final thoughts

This whole thing gives me the feels. As a standalone piece, this movie is great, were I not to know anything about the series, then I would say a nice “well done”.

Unfortunately, with the knowledge I have, I can’t say I’m satisfied. I can’t say I’m okay. Was it nice? Yes, overall, but the whole storyline is not something I’m satisfied with. There were important pieces sacrificed for the sake of having something and considering that this was a miniseries, therefore something not to be necessarily crammed in 2 hours or so there were things that could have been better dealt with.

I’ll end this here, but feel free to come to me if you want to talk about this.

[bearlywatchable-blog]

TOP 880 “SUPERHERO” MOVIES IN 2019

by Maverick B. Updated: Jan. 11, 2019

#1 - GLASS

Glass has bang or bust potential, and from all the birdies fluttering around, critics seem to think it’ll be the latter. I have unfounded high hopes for this, as it’s an interesting take on a new universe of superheroes/thrillers. Let’s coin it the Shyamalaniverse. Easy to say and spell, so that should catch on quickly.

Yes, Mr. M. Night has definitely disappointed us before (Re: The Last Airbender & Lady In The Water), he seems to be making the right moves here.

This continuation proves that Unbreakable was ahead of it’s time, and thankfully Bruce Willis hasn’t yet aged out of the character. Casting the genius of James McAvoy solidified that tertiary role as compelling and intriguing. Even if somehow the movie is a bust, Shyamalamadingdong has already qualified that by hinting the movie isn’t the movie represented in the theatrical trailers. That leads me to believe the 3 central characters, which pivotal aren’t what we will be watching for.

Enter: Casey Cooke. If that’s not a superhero secret identity name - well I guess I’m outsmarting myself. No more comments on this as theories can be just as bad as spoilers.

#2 - CAPTAIN MARVEL

Leave it to the Marvel Universe to release super fucking awesome minority character titles, right before the decade long saga blockbuster finales. Black Panther was an almost perfect Marvel movie, sadly over shadowed by the high anticipated Infinity War (Avengers 3-A). Now that they are closing out this intense storyline in Endgame (Avengers 3-B) a month after Captain Marvel is released, another minority superhero title will overshadowed by the majority of movie goers + critics. Yes, all signs point to Endgame being the film of this century, but I’m much more excited to see a female lead with such wicked awesome (MCU) power potential.

Sure - If Adam Warlock is just a diversion, Captain Marvel could play a huge role in Endgame, which would be so wonderful in my opinion. However, anyone who knows anything about the Infinity Gauntlet Saga, would be hard pressed to say that C.M. will seamlessly integrate into that storyline. This is actually why I’m more excited for Captain Marvel than Endgame. If it stands alone, it will be the foundation of the next saga of Marvel Movies (Phase 4). If it plays as a prequel to the final Avengers movie, then she will have a huge role in restoring the order of the Universe v. Thanos (Ya know, because she can time travel, among her many other super cool abilities). Both scenarios are fucking badass and exciting to me.

P.S. Brie Larson is gonna fucking kill it. You haters can go fuck yourselves.

#3 - DARK PHOENIX

//rant - Apocalypse (2016) was so bad I actually forgot it existed. Now that I have been reminded by many friends of the shit that FOX put out there- I was poised to move this down on my list. But then I went back and watched First Class (2011) & Days Of Future Past (2014), and it gave me hope again. AND THEN I watched The Last Stand (2006) again, and realized I’m obviously a masochist.

Bryan Singer is a mad man with no baseline. He, possibly, could have lucked into making one good X-Men movie on the coat tails of Matthew Vaughn, subsequently losing steam with Apocalypse. And now I’m down in the rabbit hole of the thought process; “Well Simon Kinberg wrote Days of Future Past, which was solid - and has been producing the the show Legion, which is phenomenal… and Bryan Singer is off this project so all signs point to this being more in the DOFP And First Class caliber”… meanwhile all I can do is think about Sansa Sta… I mean… Sophie Turner’s eyes and charisma… and then justify Apocalypse as a Phoenix timeline primer… which then spins me back to how bad The Last Stand was. How did that not ruin Hugh Jackman’s career? I presume Halle Berry, Kelsey Grammer, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijn and Famke Janssen all died in post production depression from that movie. Fucking Patrick Stewart was still knighted 4 years after that, which was probably only by the grace of Ian McKellen and sheer will & power of the Star Fleet.

*head explodes* - rant//

Okay- maybe I’m just really in love with Sophie Turner and want definitively nothing more than for her to kill it! Yeah, that sounds less psychotic. I think…

#4 - Avengers: ENDGAME

Do I really have to explain this one? If you’ve been living under a rock for a decade here you go:

Iron Man (2008) spawned a wonderful series of movies that became the Civil Wars/Infinity Gauntlet Saga. And now’s it’s almost over. So - like… go watch them all and then come back to this list. NOW!

PS. You can skip Captain America: Winter Soldier. It’s a little important to the timeline… but only if you really care to waste two hours of your life.

#5 - Shazam

If you’re not excited for this, then your inner child is dead. This movie, in the same vain as Aquaman, will be the good kind of bad. Which is the best we could hope for with this type of Comic based movie. Think more “Great American Hero” than Shazam reboot.

AND the planned release of DC’s “Captain Marvel” (what Shazam was called previously) is just a giant “fuck you” to the MCU. So you can assume they have recruited the greatest comic book nerd minds and put them in god mode for the production of this. Or they just picked up a screenwriter and director from a street corner and give them 30 million dollars in a gigantic gamble that is certainly not gonna be a disaster.

I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT, FOLKS!

#6 - Joker

Here’s how the equation works for the modern time Cinematic Jokers.

Jack Nicholson = Terrible Joker Heath Ledger = Amazing Joker Jared Leto = Amazingly Terrible Joker Joaquin Phoenix = Terribly Amazing Joker?

Ya dig?

#7 - SPAWN [Delayed?]

It’s not a hard story to tell. Boy meets devil. Devil punks boy. Boy feels punk’d so he tries to murder the Devil. Just like Ross and Rachel, it’s that whole “will they, won’t they” game, and it’s a beautiful train wreck.

You’re right, that’s really not a good synopsis of Spawn. This is a can’t miss though. Three simple words: Jamie Foxx, brah!

What I really mean is, if it ever gets made, this will be a great movie.

#8 - FAR FROM HOME

Homecoming really nailed it for me, and this Spider’s contribution to the Avengers movies was great. I have no reason to put this so far down on the list except I’m really done with the same story over and over again, and they haven’t really promised me anything fresh for this movie. That being said, as long as Tobey Maguire doesn’t breathe near this film, and Marc Webb is never allowed near a Marvel movie again, this franchise has been revived and will continue to rock!

PS. Tobey Maguire is the dumbest way to spell either of those names. I know it’s not his fault, but he really had options - especially in hollywood - to fix this a long time ago. *sigh*

#9 - #877 ANY RANDOM BULLSHIT MEDIA THAT PEOPLE PUT OUT DURING 2019

This is the unofficial sum of the movies/videos/short films/youtube rants/whatever that will be put out there for the public to view that will be better than the final 3 films on this list.

#878 - THE NEW MUTANTS

Calling it right now, it’s going fail so hard that people are going to walk out of the theater. If it doesn’t, I’ll vow to destroy the thing most precious to me. (currently that’s my Uber Eats App)

#879 - SUICIDE SQUAD 2

FUCK… THIS… SHIT… How did they get funding for another one. I blame Will Smith for letting this continue. FUCK THIS SHIT!

#880 - HELLBOY II

Why? I’m not even going to waste my time with this one either. FUCK THIS SHIT x2!

[mandelene]

Tag Game

Answer 15 questions and tag 15 mutuals

Thank you to @feyna-v for tagging me!

1. Are you named after someone? No, my mom picked my name just because she liked it and it was American/English and not Polish (she didn’t want to give me a Polish name).  My dad agreed to it. (My name is not Mandelene, btw). 

2. When was the last time you cried? While reading the ending of Small Country by Gael Faye a few days ago. 

3. Do you have kids? Nope, not yet, haha, but I hope to have kids someday if I can. Two or three but no more than three :) Idk how to explain it, but at some point within the past two years, I started feeling more...maternal toward kids, if that’s the right word for it. I just see kids on the bus and think, huh, yeah, I could have one of those, I think I might like that, God knows why. 

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Oh, boy. Yes. It’s not as obvious when I’m online, but ask my mother or my close friends and they will confirm that 90% of my daily life is spent being sarcastic. My life is just one big sarcastic meme. 

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? How they present themselves -- whether they’re smiling or frowning, standing up straight or slouching, etc. For men, I immediately notice how tall they are because I’m a tall woman so tall men are absolutely heavenly to look at. Any man that’s like 6′2 ft or taller and in their mid to late twenties makes my heart flutter instinctively. (This is how I know I’m definitely straight, bahahaha).

6. What’s your eye color?

Hazel. I joke that I must be adopted because my parents and sister have green eyes, but my great-grandmother had hazel eyes so I guess my parents are my parents. 

7. Scary movie or happy ending? Happy ending for sure. Scary movies rarely have a storyline that I find interesting tbh.

8. Any special talents? I’ve been told I bake a fantastic coffee cake. I can recite the alphabet backwards, and I know some first-aid, but those are skills and not really talents. 

9. Where were you born? I’m a Brooklyn baby. :D Brooklyn, NY. 

10. What are your hobbies? Writing, reading, occasional video-making, playing with my cat, indoor cycler, casual gamer, novice yoga pupil. 

11. Have you any pets? Of course. Most of you know my baby already: 

Macchiato! 

12. What sports do you play/have you played?

Oh, here we go. Brace yourselves for a tangent.

I was the sickly asthmatic kid who was too busy coughing up a lung to play sports, and I’m only half-joking. I played soccer a lot as a kid with my friends, but I was never on a team because my asthma was too severe and out of control for that. I’ve talked about this many times before, but I spent a good chunk of my childhood in the doctor’s office. I missed a lot of school. I got poked and prodded. I cried often about how much I hated being sick. I would be out playing with my friends and have an asthma attack in front of them and feel embarrassed. I would start wheezing and ignore it because I didn’t want everyone to make a big deal out of it. Don’t ever ignore your asthma, please. That never ends well. Sports were something I feared for years.

Midway through high school, my relationship with sports changed completely. I started seeing them as a method to improve my asthma rather than worsen it. My pulmonologist got my asthma under better control by coming up with a treatment regiment that he made sure I stuck to by lecturing my teenaged self at great length and wrote notes to my gym teachers at the start of every marking period. I slowly started regaining my confidence. My doctor made it clear that he was not excusing me from gym completely -- I had to exercise to the best of my ability without making myself sick, and if I kept getting attacks, it was back to the drawing board. If I couldn’t manage to exercise normally, then, in his view, my asthma was impeding my life too much and my medicine wasn’t working for me, which was totally true.  

One of my high school gym teachers, Mr. B, was notorious for being the hardest P.E. teacher in the school. I was terrified of him. Whenever he made us run laps, I would pause when I started feeling unwell, rest for a minute, and then continue. He never said a word to me about it even though he was known for scolding students for stopping. Oddly enough, it took me a while to realize this, but he was always subtlely looking out for me. He always asked me if I had my inhaler with me at the start of class. Although I was often dead last in everything he made us do, he pretended not to notice and never commented on it. I never cheated him. If he said to do 30 laps, I would do 30 laps, even if I had to pause three times in between. Everyone else would have already moved on to other exercises while I was still doing my laps, lol, but I don’t think I ever had to reach for my inhaler. At the end of the term, he pulled me aside and told me, “I know you always tried your best, and I admire that.” He gave me an A. He was the only gym teacher I had who didn’t accuse me of making excuses or being lazy. Many previous teachers had convinced me I wasn’t trying hard enough, so I would push myself, and then I promptly proceeded to have attacks, be frustrated with myself, and end up in tears in the locker room. I needed Mr. B in my life to restore my faith in gym. 

Nowadays I indoor cycle 3-4 times a week for 45 minutes to an hour to strengthen my lungs. Once a week, I have my “long tour” which is when I cycle for an hour and thirty minutes. After cycling, I lift weights for another 15-20 minutes. If I have a cold or any other upper respiratory infection, I stop all exercise until I’m well, and I hold myself to this. I have a better idea of my limits and what sports are best for me. I love swimming, but unfortunately, I don’t have a good indoor swimming pool around me, so it’s not something I can do regularly. Running/Track is still something I really struggle with, but brisk walking or hiking is fine. Last year, I was really into dance classes with my friend. Cycling is super kind to my lungs but leaves me exhausted in a good way, so that’s why it’s my favorite form of exercise. I’m sure if I did it outside though, I’d have asthma attacks. I’m generally okay with all sports/exercise as long as it doesn’t involve long stretches of running with few breaks in between, and I don’t do it outside when it’s cold. I won’t die from a light jog unless it’s the middle of January and there’s a meter of snow on the ground. You can invite me to play volleyball/basketball/tennis/whatever, and I promise I’ll be fine, haha. 

I’ve also tried getting into yoga recently by following some YouTube instructors, but cycling is what I do most regularly and have stuck to. I take frequent exercise very seriously now, and I make it a priority. 

13. How tall are you?

5′10 ft, so 177.8 cm. Super tall, I know. You should see my legs in yoga pants ;) 

14. Favorite subject in school? In elementary school, I enjoyed English classes the most. In high school, AP comparative government in my senior year was my favorite because I love international politics. Then, there came a point in my life when I stopped liking English classes and started despising them (around my second year of university). College English consists of reading novels (which is a good start) and then writing unnecessarily long papers analyzing the novel, but if the professor doesn’t like your interpretation or analysis, they’ll deduct points. They’re not the classes you want to take if you want to actually learn how to be a better writer. They just teach you how to pander to the professor and not how to think for yourself. It’s annoying. Journalism classes get right down to the technical parts of writing and tear your sentences apart. I feel like I gain more from those classes than ones in which I have to write a ten-page essay on the symbolism of a key. 

15. Dream job? A few years ago, I would have said “reporter for the New York Times,” and while that would be incredible, I have multiple dream jobs now. 

I would still love to work at a media outlet. I’d want to either work at the international desk as a writer/reporter or work on digital content like podcasts or short documentaries. However, I can also picture myself working at an NGO or at a think tank. I might also be interested in doing something in government someday--anything that has a direct impact on getting involved in a community. Global politics and writing are my two biggest passions, so if I end up doing work in either of those areas, I’ll be happy. 

Ideally, I can continue writing fiction on the side and publish it someday, but that’s still a dream I have to work my way up to. 

I don’t want to leave anybody out, so if you’re reading this and you want to answer it, consider yourself tagged by me! :) 

[ayearofpike]

The Last Vampire 3: Red Dice

Pocket Books, 1995 193 pages, 17 chapters + epilogue ISBN 0-671-87268-0 LOC: PZ7.P626 Las 1995 OCLC: 32331239 Released March 31, 1995 (per B&N)

Sita has just ended the reign of terror of a horrible sociopathic self-made vampire, but his killing spree did not escape the notice of the military. It seems they already know who and what she is, as well as her unwilling accomplice turned against his will to save his life. When he’s captured, she resolves to save him before the military can do horrible things with his blood. This mission is all the more urgent when she realizes that the scientist leading the research efforts is an old friend. Like, a REALLY old friend.

It was about here when I realized that Pike didn’t actually have a single plotted story for Sita, that he was just writing her adventures as they came to him. I might be misremembering this, but I feel like we’d been led to understand that The Last Vampire was going to be a trilogy, like Remember Me and his favorite title-drop Lord of the Rings. (I have not been keeping track of LotR references, but there’s one in almost every book. Reread @mildhorror‘s recaps if you don’t believe me.) Getting hit with another “to be continued” was sort of a gut punch.

But beyond that, the way it puts an old character in a new situation made me aware that this was becoming a serial rather than one story. This book doesn’t really do anything new to tie up loose ends. That door was mostly closed in the previous one, when she dispatched the original vampire. But as soon as she turned a dude, it created new loose ends that Sita now has to shear off before the story closes up. It’s a perfectly fine self-contained story, if a lot more actiony and cartoon-violent than most of Pike’s work, but it’s not exactly clear how it belongs to the previous storyline (or whether it even does).

Let’s see if I can find or assume some context for how this book ended up getting constructed.

In 1995, the public at large had just been exposed to Quentin Tarantino’s stylized violence, with Pulp Fiction coming off a controversial Oscar loss and becoming a sleeper hit. Seeing how this was received by the teens who were ostensibly Pike’s audience, it makes sense that he would have wanted to incorporate some gory battle scenes. Especially as Interview With the Vampire had also just come out — I have no doubt Pike wanted to differentiate his cool-young-adult vampire from Tom Cruise’s brooding Gothic.

Spooksville would start in October of this year. I’ve mentioned this series before, but its importance to Sita’s story is that it tells semi-related juvenile horror tales linked to a handful of main characters living in a town where this kind of stuff happens. That is to say: the main kids are the only real common link between the events. I expect that he’d already started writing the series at this point, and that the structure affected how he told The Last Vampire stories (and probably in turn his love for Sita helped him define the structure of Spooksville; after all, Goosebumps didn’t have the same protagonist in every book.)

In any case, it’s both drastically different from the suspense thrillers and mysteries that Pike’s mostly written to date, and game-changing in terms of what we would now expect about Sita stories. I think I already made this analogy: The Last Vampire is Pike’s Final Fantasy, an inspired tale about the end of an era that would seize unexpected popularity and spawn sequels unto eternity.

So let’s try to blaze through the recap, because there’s not a whole bunch of plot. Sita wakes up the day after her battle with New Vampire with a tube still stretching between her and FBI Dude. She realizes she’s been out for nearly 24 hours because it was midnight when the fight started and now it’s still dark but her watch says it’s just before twelve. But also she hears police cars, and knows that they need to escape before they’re asked a lot of questions. (I have one: if they knew what she was, which they probably did, why wouldn’t they come at NOON?) Sita prefers to keep a low profile, because she knows that if someone suspects her supernatural abilities, she’s going to get tested and dissected and someone is going to try to make more (like the coroner’s assistant already did). She doesn’t need to be responsible for that.

But since she’s dealing with a baby vampire who thinks he can use the government bureaucracy to his advantage, they don’t get out. Instead, they’re thrown into an armored van with five armed guards (three in back with them, two in the front) and a driver behind bulletproof glass. This within a caravan of armored vehicles and under surveillance from a helicopter. Of course Sita has escaped from worse situations. She’s handcuffed and shackled, but her eyes are free, and that’s what she uses to hypnotize the guards into pointing their weapons away long enough to break the ankle restraints and kick two of them dead. The third she kills just by telling him to die, which is when she realizes that Original Vampire’s blood is starting to give her new and stronger powers. Because FBI Dude is squeamish, she knocks out the other two guards and then learns from the driver that they’re not going to jail, but to a high-security government facility.

This is where the book turns into an action movie. Sita has the driver crank a turn into a narrow alley and then floor it. They makes it across two streets before smashing into a fruit truck, which gives her enough cover to jump out of the van and start shooting. This clears out a police car from ... unidentified somewhere for them to steal, and they lead the chase into the basement parking garage of a tall building, where they hop an elevator to the top floor. Then Sita breaks a window and jumps across the street to the roof of another building, and roof-hops along that side of the street to one with a helicopter pad on the roof. She steals one and comes back for FBI Dude, and they take off into the desert. So much for that low profile.

The police (or government agents, or whoever it is) pursue them but don’t try to catch up or engage. We learn why when, as they cross over southern Nevada, they’re set upon by two military combat helicopters. More questions: why not a fighter jet? Nellis is right there, and a jet is faster and more heavily armed than a chopper. But anyway, they cripple Sita’s chopper, forcing FBI Dude to bail into Lake Mead, and before she can crash it and escape herself they blow it up with a missile. When she wakes up she’s pinned underwater by the helicopter’s wreckage, but her unconscious mind has had the presence to not let her drown. She surfaces in the middle of the lake to see what’s up, and sure enough they’ve caught FBI Dude again and are throwing him in another armored van. Frickin’ baby vampires can’t do anything.

She steals a truck from a nearby campsite and follows the new military caravan out to some secure facility in the middle of the desert. She watches FBI Dude get trucked out and displayed to a uniformed general, and it’s confirmed that yes, the military knows what they are and yes, they were trying to take them alive. FBI Dude gets shunted into one of the buildings, and Sita takes special note of the scientist that the general talks to afterward. Just one scientist, yes. He leaves shortly afterward, and she goes to follow him, but realizes something weird as she gets in her truck to follow him.

She’s glowing.

That’s right, all y’all that were pissed about Edward Cullen! Pike did it first! Granted, this is in the moonlight and not the sun, but STILL.

She decides to worry about it later and follows the scientist to a casino, where he loses too much money and drinks too much, then to his house just before sunrise. If she’s going to use this dude to get close and figure out how to save her buddy, she needs to redo her identity again. So she gets her secretive business manager or whatever in New York to set her up with new ID, new credit cards, new hair, new clothes, the whole shebang. Yeah — from here until the end of the book we’re supposed to imagine her as a redhead, which is hard to do because we’ve already got two books of blonde Alisa Perne.

When the scientist goes to work, she follows him to see where he goes in, and then breaks into his house and sees a strange model. It looks like DNA, but it has twelve strands instead of two. She recognizes it immediately — it’s the same as a model made by an alchemist she knew seven hundred years ago in Italy during the Catholic Inquisition, a monk who she took as a lover, to whom she revealed the secrets of her life and her history when he watched her heal a kid’s broken spine. So if this guy has a similar model, they must have another vampire and have already been researching, which means Sita has more to save and/or destroy.

She goes back out to the military compound to try to plan an attack, and the glowing skin makes her curious, so she takes off all her clothes and watches her body light up and start to become transparent and feel lighter. She assumes this is another unexplainable power conveyed by Original Vampire’s blood, but to what end? She doesn’t have time to figure it out right now; there’s a scientist to seduce! They gamble for a while, then Sita buys him dinner and they go back to his house, where he tells her just enough about his research to make her feel both sorry for him and further set in her need to rescue FBI Dude ASAP.

While everyone’s asleep, Sita finishes the woeful tale of the alchemist. It seems that he drew some of her blood and used it to heal incurable illnesses in combination with crystals and moonlight. But then he went too far and tried to use it on someone healthy — the boy from before, in fact, with full midday sun streaming through. This ended up creating a monster ruled by fear, and Sita had to kill him, and the inquisitors took the alchemist and she never saw him again.

This wouldn’t be a Last Vampire book without two things: drinking blood and Seymour. She gets the first from a hapless high roller, first by beating him at the card table, then insulting him, then inviting him to what appears to be a desert gangbang, then scaring off his bodyguards and mercilessly drinking her fill. Seymour comes in because she’s not sure what’s coming next with the scientist and the military and the moon-glow, so she calls him to get some ideas and assistance. He says that the only way to be sure they don’t keep vampire blood is to blow up the entire base with the nuclear bombs they probably have on site, this being a secret military facility in Nevada and all.

So now she’s got a plan, and she needs to figure out how to carry it out. When the scientists opens up about his concerns about their test subject and what the scary general wants to do with his blood, Sita tells him everything. Like, literally everything: what her name is, that she’s a vampire, that she’s five thousand years old, that she was turned by the original vampire who she just killed this week, that she knew Krishna, the whole nine yards. In return, he tells her where they’re keeping FBI Dude and the other vampire they’ve had for a month. Her plan is to sneak into the compound in the scientist’s trunk, pose as a tech on loan from the Pentagon, and somehow break out the two vampires.

It all goes according to plan, except there’s only one vampire in the cell. At least until Sita opens the door and goes to rescue FBI Dude, at which point the door slams shut and the scientist talks to her in Italian. Yep! The other vampire he had was her, way back in the thirteenth century! He used her blood on himself, although imperfectly, so in the last seven centuries he’s aged about twenty years. And now he’s got her right where he wants her, so he can keep doing his experiments and improving humanity through vampirism.

The general doesn’t care about any of that shit — he just wants to be stronger than anyone else. This is his weakness, knowing Sita’s power and being afraid of it until he gets it for himself. So she manipulates the guards into panic (more powers she didn’t have before, being able to hypnotize someone without even seeing them) and then breaks all the lights in the cell and starts pounding on the door. So they amass a whole fighting force and open the door, but of course Sita has used her magical vampire powers to ... hide behind it. She has to kill a guard slowly and messily to keep up the fear paralysis, and then she mows most of the rest of them down with a machine gun. All the killing is starting to upset her, or so she says, maybe because of Squeamish FBI Dude, because it doesn’t stop her from planning to nuke the joint.

The general is already upstairs, trying to escape, so Sita JUMPS THROUGH THE CEILING and shoots him in the leg so he can’t go anywhere. Then she gets him to take her to the weapons stockpile and arm a nuclear bomb with a timer, supposedly long enough for everyone to get away from the blast. She has to fry his brain with her hypnosis to get him to do it, but now Science Alchemist is in command and he’s got orders from the president to not let her get away under any circumstances. (Like he might have otherwise, right?) The nuke’s ticking down, and they’re in a standoff, but she finally convinces him to let the rest of the troops get out and away, so now it’s just Sita and FBI Dude and Fried General and Science Alchemist, waiting for the bomb to go off.

And Sita starts glowing again.

This time, she lights up all the way, becoming light itself, and floats off the ground and away in the wind, saying her goodbyes to the old monk who has stolen her blood and the new friend who she turned against his will and the military leader who she has effectively lobotomized. By the time the nuke blows, she’s long gone. 

The next thing we see is Science Alchemist’s basement. No, Pike doesn’t explain how Sita reassembled her body or whatever after floating away as a being of light. No, he doesn’t spend any time on what it means or how she should use it. Yes, it would have been a perfect time to close with an epilogue about how she’s come back to Krishna and her life is complete, along the lines of the dreams she has throughout these books. But instead, she’s in a basement in Las Vegas, where there’s a complicated array of crystals and mirrors, and she’s going to turn human with Seymour’s help (and blood). So she falls asleep doing it, and when she wakes up, someone is pounding on the door insisting she let him in. And that’s it!

So, I have to say it, and you should imagine the clapping emoji between each of the words in the following sentence: THERE WAS NO PURPOSE BEHIND SITA TURNING FBI DUDE EXCEPT TO KEEP THE AUDIENCE HANGING. Seriously, his name should have been Plot Devicerson. He gave us a springboard into the third book, he gave Sita a reason to act throughout it, and now he’s fuckin’ dead. He’s not even a tie to her life before, any more than a divorce lawyer is a tie to a marriage. The whole book could have conceivably done without him, although it would have admittedly taken a little more thought to get her out to the military installation in the first place.

You know, I wish Pike would have called a spade a spade with this series. If it had been a stand-alone serial novel set called The Last Vampire, I would have been totally fine. The stories themselves and Sita as a character I don’t necessarily have a problem with. But they DO NOT FIT TOGETHER. And by now it’s too late to retcon this into another Baby-Sitters Club or Nancy Drew type of series, so he’s stuck attemping to link one unique narrative to another.

It’s gonna be another year before we see Sita again, so I have to deduce that Pike just couldn’t bring himself to kill her off even though he didn’t know exactly what she would be doing next. And it’s OK to keep that door open — if you just admit you’re doing a serial rather than a continuance. In retrospect, I think that’s what annoyed me so much about these books, even if I didn’t realize it at the time. I guess we have to wait and see if Pike can save this series as a continued story, sometime in the next ... six books GODDAMMIT.