#like how much thought i put into the continuity of the songs and the overall cohesion of the mixes lol

[bloomfish]

I've been remaking some of my old mixes from 8tracks (rest in peace, most beautiful website) on spotify and honestly some of them were so good I'm impressed with myself. I should do this for a living. wish there was a job that involved putting different songs together in a specific order

[alastor-simp]

Alastor with a female reader who is selectively mute Part 1

I always wanted to know how Alastor would react to a demon character like this or who is similar to Komi-san from Komi Can't communicate, so this is going to be my take on it.

**First Meeting**

Your arrival in hell wasn't a pleasant one. Literally the second you fell, you were approached by demons left and right, either trying to rob you or offering to sleep with you. Yelling at them would have been easy, but you were a very anxious person to the point you were mute with everyone you encountered. Surprisingly, you were able to run away from the unwanted problems you faced in hell, and was able to come across a flyer that was taped to one of the alley walls. "Come stay at the Happy Hotel" it read, and you figured that it might be a good place to stay for a while and try to make a sense of what you could do now that you were in hell. Having followed the map that was on the other side of the flyer, you were able to come across the hotel, but the neon sign was different then what the paper said, but you figured they probably were remodeling it.

The hotel was huge, it was plastered with neon signs, but also had a radio tower on one side, a large fish like contraption, and a pirate ship. "Amazing" you thought to yourself as you made your way closer to the door, and lightly knocked. A cheery voice was heard on the other side and soon the door opened to reveal a pretty, blonde girl. She had devilish features, but a very adorable baby face, and her smile was quite cute as well. "Oh! Hello! My name is Charlie Morningstar. How may I help you?", she said to you with big bright eyes, as she was patiently waiting for your response. Clenching your jaw, feelings of anxiety began to well up in your stomach, but you bared with it and simply held up the hotel poster in front of Charlie. Charlie was a little curious about your strange response, but she put the pieces together that you were wanting to stay at the hotel. "SQUEAL!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING!", she said as she threw her arms around you in a bear hug, then letting you go as she pulled you into the hotel.

The inside of the hotel was nice, but needed some remodeling, but you liked it overall. Looking around, you noticed the other demons that were in the hotel. A mini demon was zipping around in a cute dress, cleaning the ceiling with a duster, a cat like demon was chugging a bottle of booze at the bar, and a very tall spider was standing next to the record player, picking out a song. Stopping what they were doing, they all turned to look at you, curiously. Nervous, you raised your hand at them, signifying a hello. The cat demon just nodded his head and continue chugging, while the fast demon zipped in front of you, waving back with a smile, before zooming away to finish cleaning. The tall spider gave you a wink, as they walked to the bar and took a seat. "Vaggie! We have another patron!" Charlie said, as she yelled out next to you, while also leading you to one of the lobby couches to have a seat. As Charlie walked away, your eyes began to scan around the hotel, taking in every detail, and also glancing at the portraits hanging on the wall with Charlie and what looked to be her parents.

"Why Hello there! Who might you be?", a static voice said, as you looked up to see a red suit man with a very sharp smile standing in front of you, leaning down to place his face closer to yours. He was dressed to the nines in a red striped coat, along with a monocle and bow-tie. He also appeared to be holding a microphone staff? Was he a singer by chance? Realizing you were getting distracted, you just nodded your head at the man, and pointed to the poster, similar to what you did with Charlie. The man raised an eyebrow, as he continued to lean closer, most likely waiting for your answer, as his smile got wider, almost breaking his face.

**Alastor POV**

Alastor's eyes continued to stare at the quiet demon, who was holding the poster and kept tapping against it frantically. Amused, Alastor leaned closer, while moving his staff to tap against her chin: "Something wrong my dear? Cat got your tongue?" Alastor watched as the demon remained silent, but he could tell by their eyes that they were nervous, oh how entertaining. "Oh Alastor! So nice of you to show up! This is our new patron who just arrived at the hotel", Alastor heard, as he turned to see Charlie smiling at him, while dragging Vaggie by the hand. Leaning back from his position, Alastor continued to gaze at you while turning back to Charlie. "Ah! So this wayward sinner is here to stay at the hotel! Excellent!" Alastor beamed, as he look down at you, while you shifted in your seat.

**Your POV**

You started to feel a little uncomfortable with everyone's eyes on you, making you clench your hands on your lap. You noticed the other demon next to Charlie. She had long grey hair, and only one of her eyes was showing. She did give you a hard gaze when she saw you, but it softened after few minutes. As she came closer to you, she waved her hand as a hello, while also asking what your name was. You stayed silent, as the butterflies in your stomach made you feel like you wanted to vomit, as everyone was watching you, waiting for your answer. "Whats the matter with you, toots? You deaf or something?", The spider demon had taken a seat next to you, while wrapping an arm around your neck with one of his arms, while poking your cheek with his other hand. Freezing up, you felt your eyes start to water, and you started to slightly shake. Charlie noticed your reactions and bent down on her knees to gaze at you, asking if you were alright. Taking a slow deep breath, you nodded then made a notion with your hands asking for something to write on. Charlie quickly got up and ran to the desk to grab a large notepad and pen, before coming back to you. Once you had the notepad, you began to write down what you wanted to say, before turning the notepad around for everyone to see, while giving them a shy smile:

"Hello my name is Y/N. I just arrived in Hell a few minutes ago and I saw your poster and wanted to stay here. I'm sorry for not responding to you guys normally, but I am selectively mute, I'm sorry again. Its very nice to meet all of you!"

Everyone around you slowly read the notepad and all turned back to look at you. Charlie and Vaggie looked very apologetic, the spider just shrugged his shoulders, the mini one just continued to smile at you, but more softly this time, and the cat demon just continued to drink from the bar. The man in red, or Alastor as they called him, continued to smile at you, seeming unfazed by what you wrote, but you noticed his eyes soften a bit, but he made sure to hide it from the others. "Oh! I'm sorry if we made you uncomfortable." Charlie began to bow her head, but you waved your hands, letting her know it was alright. Charlie raised her head, and soon her frown turned back into a bright smile: "Oh yes, let me introduce everyone! This is Vaggie, my girlfriend. The spider next to you is Angel Dust. Niffty is the small cute one. Husk is the one at the bar, and this is Alastor." You listened to all of the names Charlie said, and looked at everyone, while smiling and nodding your head. Angel Dust smirked while looking at you, turning you head to look at him: "You're quite a cutie aren't ya? I bet your voice sounds very sexy." Angel continued to wrap his arms around you, continuing to flirt with you, until Alastor's staff smacked him on the head. "Now my good fellow! It's not proper to talk that way to a lady! Please kindly remove yourself from them!" Alastor said, as he gazed at Angel, smiling still, but it looked more menacing this time. Angel let you go, while rubbing his head: "Satan F*** Al! You didn't have to hit me with that thing!" Vaggie then yelled at them both to be quiet, as she walked over to front desk and grabbed what looked like to be a room key. She walked back and handed it to you, telling you that your room is on the fourth floor and you can go up there and get settled. Nodding your head as a thank you, you began to walk over to one of the elevators and made your way to your room.

Arriving in your room, you scanned around the interior. The room had some dust and cobwebs, but a little cleaning would help with that. The room was decorated in a maroon red, with a large bed with black sheets, two large windows with curtains, a bathroom and a very wide closet. It almost felt like you got the home suite, which made you feel guilty as you really didn't need a extravagant room like this. Still in thought, you were alerted by a rhythmic knock on your door. Walking over, you looked in the peephole to see Al standing there with his big smile. Opening the door, you nodded your head at Alastor, as he smiled down at you. "Hello again my dear! I was wondering if you had time to chat!"

***Alastor POV***

The quiet sinner nodded her head at Al, while opening the door, allowing me to come in. How adorable! He thought, while making his over to the center of the room and turning back to look at them. "Now my dear! I am here wanting to apologize for how I acted in the lobby! I wasn't behaving like a proper gentleman and I understand if I made you uncomfortable, so let me offer you my sincerest apologies! Let's start over from the beginning, shall we?" Alastor bowed his head a bit, as a sign of him apologizing, and extending his hand out in a handshake. You appeared taken aback in Alastor's eyes, ,but you gave him a soft smile and shook his hand. Once you finished shaking hands, you grabbed the notepad and pen again and began to write to Al, as he gazed at you, wondering what you were writing before you turned the notepad around. Alastor leaned closer, and began to read the message:

"It is alright, Alastor. There is no need for you to apologize. And besides, I'm the one that should apologize for not answering your question when you asked me."

Alastor finished reading, and turned his eyes towards you. His sharp smile slowly turned into a soft grin and his glowing eyes had softened. "Don't worry about that my dear! Now I take it since you will have just arrived in Hell, you are lacking some necessities correct?" Alastor had moved away from you, as he continued to talk while walking around your room. Turning back to you, you gave him a small nod. "Then we will head to the city! Me and Charlie can accompany you! What do you think?" he said, as he turned back to you, with his large grin coming back. Nodding your head at Alastor was his indication that you accepted. Smiling wider, Alastor turned back to you, as he made his way to your door. "It feels that I have extended my stay, so I will leave you be darling! Do make yourself comfortable!" he said, as turned his head back to you. Pulling out the pad again, you wrote down another message and showed it to Al.

"Thank you."

"Your welcome my dear! Have a pleasant evening! Also don't forget to head to the kitchen later! My mother's famous jambalaya is on the menu for tonight! So good, it nearly killed her! HAHA!" , Laughing out his response, Al watched as he saw you give him a smile, a real smile this time. "My! What a gorgeous smile!" He thought, as he bid you adieu and made his way back to the lobby. As he made his way back, Alastor stopped and thought about you. Puzzling was a word he used to describe you. He had never encountered a sinner down here who chose to not speak while having the ability to do so. He mostly assumed you were terrified of him, due to his status as "The Radio Demon. Most feared overlord in Hell.", but that wasn't the case. Something about you made him feel odd, hell he even apologized to you, which he would never do given his massive pride/ego, so he wondered why. Seeing you write on the notepad and apologizing for not responding normally, made his heart ache. Why should you apologize for something like that? Realizing he had stopped in the middle of the hallway, he carried on back to the others, still thinking about you and also how would your voice sound when you spoke out loud. Alastor smiled wider, as he thought you were going to be a very special and entertaining sinner here at the hotel.

Part 2 of the story is Here

[psychickiss]

smile!

— saiki kusuo x reader (gn, 2nd pov)

— summary: Helping out Saiki has its perks—example, he smiles for a picture with you on what would look like a date to outsiders.

— notes: this was an old fic i posted from june! edited it a little and finally remembered to reup here :-)

— things: hmmmm i guess the reader's relationship with saiki is kind of romantic? but the overall dialogue and stuff is platonic :-)

— masterlist | request form

When Saiki couldn’t go to Toritsuka for help, he’d approach you.

You weren’t explicitly aware of his powers, but you’ve had your suspicions. Though, it was something you never brought up in conversation with Saiki.

Whenever you do help Saiki out, you assure him that he isn’t in debt to you. This results in Saiki going out of his way to silently pay you back. He knows your words are true, but he wasn’t okay with a good deed going unrewarded.

Additionally, you were okay with doing just about anything. Help him stay away from the sports festival? Sure, you hated it too. Join the Occult club so there’s a not-so-annoying familiar face? Why not? The club seemed like it wouldn’t be too much work.

Talk to a guy from another class for Saiki? Okay.

You weren’t the best at starting a conversation, and neither was Satou Hiroshi. Why Saiki wants to know his interests, you didn’t bother asking. It wasn’t your business.

Opening a conversation with Satou wasn’t hard at all—you figured you could just lie on the spot. “Hi, Satou. Truth be told, I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while. I want to make friends from every section, and I thought I’d talk to you.”

Satou looks up at you, surprised. “Me? But, I’m not as interesting as the other guys here... Like Toritsuka–”

You abruptly shake your head. “I’ve interacted enough with him. I’m good. But, you... You just have a calming presence, you know? Puts people at ease.”

Saiki, from afar, listens in on your conversation. You had suggested to be on call with him as you made conversation with Satou.

Listening in on your conversation with Satou was something Saiki could do without the help of technology, but you didn’t know that, so Saiki agreed. This made you one of the really few people in Saiki’s phone contacts.

You pull an empty chair near Satou and sit on it. “So, tell me, what do you like? Any favorite bands, drinks, stuff like that?”

Satou happily answers you. “One OK Rock! I love their songs! Ah, I drink a lot of peach tea, too.”

You smile at Satou. “Oh, that’s nice. Do you have any hobbies?”

“I like to read.”

You nod. Average hobby. I like to read too. Everyone likes reading to a certain degree. You then ask him, “Oh? What kind of stuff do you read?”

Satou hums. “Well, I read all kinds of books. I like to pick up a copy of Weekly Jump on Fridays; kind of a reward for getting through the week.”

“That’s so interesting...! Would you want to walk home with me later? That way, we could talk more.” You put your hand in your pocket, checking to see if your phone was still there. You proceed to stand up from the chair and put it back in its place.

Satou awkwardly laughs in response. “I’m sorry, but I have a few errands to do after school, I wouldn’t want to drag you around with me. Maybe some other time.”

You laugh back. “It’s alright. There’s no need for you to apologize! I’ll be on my way now. Good luck with class, Satou.”

“Thank you, you too.” Satou waves before walking away.

You take out your phone and hold it close to your ear. “So? Is that all?”

Saiki hums. “Yes. Thank you.”

“How are you going to get this week’s Jump? We aren’t allowed to leave schoolgrounds until classes are over.”

Saiki answers you, “I have my ways.”

You furrow your brows. “Alright... Why do you want to hang out with him, anyway? No offense, but he’s kind of... bland.”

“That’s exactly why I want to talk to him. Also, we can stop the call. I can see you walking towards me.”

You sigh and end the call, continuing your conversation with Saiki face-to-face. “Alright... And you’re sure he’ll talk to you?”

Saiki shrugs.

You reply flatly, “That’s reassuring. I’ll be at Café Mami if things go well, or not. The usual booth. I’ll just text you.”

I could use clairvoyance to find you, but that works.

...

You enter Café Mami, alone for the time being, and look for an empty booth. You spot one and head straight to it, setting your bag down. You text Saiki.

You:

Do you want coffee jelly?

Saiki:

👍🏼

You:

How’s it going with Satou?

Saiki:

I’m waiting for him by the gate. I have a copy of this week’s Jump with me, and I bought peach tea from the cafeteria.

You:

Okay. This means you’ll be going to Café Mami though, right?

Saiki:

I’m just going for the coffee jelly.

You smile at his message before closing your phone. Keep telling yourself that, Saiki.

The manager approaches you and takes your order; you order something for yourself, and two cups of coffee jelly for Saiki. One for him to eat here, and...

“The other coffee jelly is to-go, thank you.”

You open your phone again and search up the band Satou mentiond, One OK Rock. You rummage your bag for your earphones, but to your dismay, you couldn’t find it.

You quietly sigh to yourself. I guess... I’ll listen with my phone really close to my ear. God, I hope no one hears.

You choose a song and pleasantly listen to it. This actually isn’t so bad. Might add this to my playlist– the song stops. You check the notification.

Saiki:

Hello. I am on my way there.

You:

Take care. ♡

You see Saiki enter Café Mami, and your eyes dart towards the earphones he’s wearing. You point at it. “Those are mine! Where did you get those?”

Saiki sits down as he answers you, “Your bag.”

“You didn’t ask...!”

The manager approaches you two. “Here’s your order. The coffee jelly to-go will be served shortly.”

Saiki looks at you, confused about that last sentence.

“Ah, I ordered a second one for you to enjoy at home.”

Saiki’s eyes sparkle at your words.

You bring your order closer to you. “So, how did things go with Satou?”

Saiki slumps his shoulders and dejectedly hands you back your earphones. “I’ll be taking both coffee jellies to-go, thanks.”

Your voice was riddled with panic, “Huh–?! No, don’t go! Is it that bad?”

“He didn’t talk to me.”

You laugh. “That’s it? Did you even try to talk to him? You’re not the most chatty person I know.”

Saiki nods. “I had everything he liked; Weekly Jump, peach tea, and I was listening to One OK Rock. I even smiled at him.”

You hold back your laughter, you didn’t want Saiki to feel worse than he already did. “Maybe... Maybe he didn’t talk to you because he knew you stole my earphones.”

Irritated, Saiki replies, “That is totally unrelated”

You shrug. “Yeah.” You decide to tease him, “Maybe your smile was weird. Off-putting. I mean, you don’t smile a lot.”

Saiki shakes his head. “My smile wasn’t weird.”

“I’ll have to see for myself.”

“No.”

“You’re no fun.”

Saiki doesn’t reply to your comment, opting to finally eat the coffee jelly in front of him.

“Here’s the coffee jelly to-go. Your order’s complete. Thank you!”

You smile at the waiter and gently push the paper bag with the coffee jelly inside towards Saiki.

Hm... Maybe if he smiled at Satou like that, then they’d be hanging out like this. Ah, then I wouldn’t be able to see Saiki so happy. Perhaps I’ll be selfish, just this once.

Saiki thought to himself as he ate the coffee jelly. For someone who’s had their suspicions about my powers, you sure think rather shamelessly. You’ve done a lot for me, so I’ll let you have this.

Saiki finishes his coffee jelly. “Take out your phone.”

You do as told, although clueless to Saiki’s intentions. “Okay...?”

“I’ll show you the smile I gave to Satou.”

You move over in your seat so Saiki could sit beside you. He takes the hint and walks over to you.

You two smile and you snap a picture, the smile on your face still there as you examine it. Saiki returns to his seat.

You two were smiling, but you were the only one looking at the camera. You look up from your phone, then at Saiki. “Why were you looking at me?”

He’d then respond, “I wasn’t ready.” You looked happy.

[tyudearyous]

[11.59 PM]

pairing : established relationship, producer! s.mg x producer! reader

warnings : nothing really, it's a short read, just fluffy overall

🎵 11.59 - jey ft goopy

...

"how long are you going to stay here?" you asked mingi while helping him with his song. it has been a few weeks since the both of you started to work on a project he had been excited about, since it would be his personal debut work. it has been years since he started producing and he has countless songs under his belt but never was those his personal work. it was always for someone else so, when his label gave him this opportunity, he was immediately hooked.

"mmm, just a little bit" mingi mutters, eyes completely locked to the screen. you stopped to gaze at him properly. he was wearing just a simple grey tee and he just recently bleached his hair silver. even with all the simplicity he is, song mingi is just beautiful to you. you couldn't help but smile and you brought your chair closer to him.

"hmm?" he stopped working momentarily and glanced at you. "nothing, just work" you said while playing with his silver locks. mingi loves it whenever you play with his hair. it's soothing and nice to him. his head slowly leaned to your touch while still focusing on his work. "silver suits you, minmin" you complimented him. his ears slowly adorned a rose color, blushing. "you prefer this or pink?" mingi asked you. "ouch, that's hard to pick!" you pouted before slapping his arms jokingly. "any color suits you honestly but i like it when your hair is slightly long, i can play with it" you continued playing with his hair.

"you wanna end work now?" mingi immediately rotated his chair to face you. you nodded and began turning off your workstation. mingi soon does the same and tidied up the workspace.

"can i drive today?" you asked. it was usually mingi who would drive home, just because but tonight, you wanted to drive. "you sure?" mingi asked while he put on his black coat. "yep, 100 percent" you replied while giving him the puppy eyes. he took a while before giving you a yes and giving you his car keys.

after tidying up everything, the two of you walked from the studio to the parking lot. "i'm gonna be busy next week" you stated. "huh? why?" he asked. "i have to take care of the recordings of rina's group" a pout slowly formed on his face. this didn't go unnoticed by you. adorable, you thought before pinching his cheeks which made a smile formed back to his face. "i'll still make time for you, don't worry about it my princess" you teased him and patted his head.

when the two of you arrived at the parking lot, you entered his car and he sat in the passenger seat. you adjusted the seat to make yourself comfortable. well, mingi is very tall, like VERY TALL while you were just average... so of course you didn't need as much leg space as he does. he looked at you doing this and started laughing. "what?" you stared at him while adjusting the seat. he held up the backrest, helping you adjust the seat. "it's just funny seeing you do all that because you're short" teased mingi. "excuse me!? i'm not that short, you're just too tall" you responded in a fake offended way. once you were comfortable, you started the car.

the entire drive was silent but comfortable with your playlist serenading the entire ride. mingi always let you play your playlist during drives like this and honestly, you love it. the fact that he always lets you do things you liked.

"it has been 4 years huh?" you muttered. it has been almost 4 years since when mingi got down to his knees asking for you to be his girlfriend in front of a convenience store. "yeah, 4 years since i embarrassed myself completely" you immediately laughed, remembering how he confessed. "i didn't expect you'll do that, genuinely" he chuckled. "at least i got you now" mingi mutters which made you blush slightly. you were grateful it was dark. if it wasn't, you'd look like a blushing mess.

after a 10 minute drive, you both arrived at your destination a.k.a mingi's apartment. you parked his car immediately and together you went to his unit together. when you got to his apartment, you immediately took off your shoes. "ouch... i shouldn't have used this..." you glanced at the back of your feet where a blister formed because of the ill fitting shoes you wore. "why?" mingi looked at you worriedly. "just a blister, get me some meds and plaster, it'll be okay" you hurriedly went to the couch to rest your feet.

mingi immediately brought the meds and started to tend your blisters. "i told you to change those shoes since a while ago" mingi frowned. "well, it was a gift so i had to be appreciative of it. oh come on stop frowning, i'll stop using it okay?" you cupped mingi's face. "don't use it again" he finished treating your blister. "thank you, minmin" you placed a kiss to his cheeks. he was still frowning but now his cheeks are slightly rosy. "don't make me worried you fool" he kissed you softly. you giggled and he smiled at your antics.

these type of moments are moments you dearly loved and held to. a night filled with each other's embrace and love. hopefully, these moments will last forever both for you and mingi.

[disruptivevoib]

Long Ramble about CCCC and my overall feelings on what the album means and such

Something I find important about CCCC is like.

The fact that all three of them are, in some way, trying.

Heart is emotion, he is prone to himself and being reactionary, in the moment. Prone to the past of learned behavior and trauma. Reactive and rapidly changing. He isn't going to make pure sense because he isn't based in logic or in societal ideals or views. He is an instinctual response to the environment and circumstances. His manipulation is not intentional. He has very little control of himself in the end. Its why Mind talks about claiming to relish entropy yet clearly needing help. But, Heart in earnest wants them to be okay and safe. He believes that Mind's control will drain the life from them. It will make things monotonous and the same. Too much order.

Mind in turn, believes Heart is manipulative with intention. He wants to control Soul or wants to just drag them all down with him into this depressive state. Mind is logic, he is the reasoning out of your emotional instinct. Your inner critique, and when unchecked, that inner critique goes from a guiding hand for your emotion to one that debates and bullies it. Invalidating its responses. Ultimately, though. Mind just believes he is helping. He is doing what must be done and telling the "hard truths" to Heart. And that Heart is being the petty child. Which- I mean. Sort of sure. But Mind is definitely fucking petty and childish. He's stubborn! Prideful! So ofc he is. Admitting you're wrong? No.. why would he EVER do that.. nuh uh.

Which is what makes Light so crucial. Mind asking Heart for help- but also. There is Soul.

Who while ambiguous in purpose, is mostly that background voice. Your inner narration. If Mind is Logic and Reason then Heart is Emotion and Instinct,, Soul is all that lives between it. And he is constantly silenced or spoken over or around. He does not get a word in edgewise until TSE. He may show up in the background occasionally but as much as Heart and Mind claim to want to keep him alive and help him, they also fail to actually acknowledge what he says.

Which is that they both are right and wrong. That this fighting is doing directly what they both feared it would. Soul is desperate by the end. He is angry and resentful because.. well. Self hatred due to intense self awareness and reflection is rather ig. Common. Im not a professional here but from personal experience, you get so tired of rehashing the same shit with yourself over and over. It all feels pointless.

The only out, by the end of it all to Soul is that if they cannot be Whole, whats the point? He is desperate. He does not want to die but he feels theres no other solution.

And. About Whole, Soul throughout the album seems to want that. At the beginning, to be Whole or Harmonious is to be mentally healthy, maybe even "normal" by society's standards. To be able to put a mask over your problems and be, again, "normal". It takes the entire album for Soul to realize that this:

1. isnt possible

And

2. There isn't anything evil or wrong with him for that.

Mental health is a struggle. But you are not evil and should not be othered because you struggle. You also do not need to be fixed for being a little different and people's opinion of you is not what matters most so long as you are happy (and not hurting others. Lol).

Thats what Two Wuv is entirely about as a song. Its a "fuck you. Fuck this! I thought I needed to be this! But I DON'T. Stop telling me who I am! How to be! I'm gonna be me!"

His entire arc is parallel to Heart and Mind's and is crucial in the culmination of becoming yourself again and accepting yourself.

But, as mental health will always be, this period of respite and self acceptance is not always forever. And as life continues or as you lapse back into a depressive episode.. you cannot help but forget what it is like when you're not this way- and hell! Vice versa too! Some people have this disconnect between the periods. Where the things from the depressive state seem dramatic or obtuse to you while you are doing better. And from the other end, you just want to be happy again.. but you get so lost in it all you can struggle to feel like you've ever been happy.

The album is about the human experience. It is about self-sabotage, mental illness, self-hatred and reflection and it is, maybe more importantly about self-acceptance and healing. Having a bit of mercy on yourself. Accepting that you are imperfect and that this is okay. And whatever flaws you may have that need to be mended or worked on, can be. And that who you are, for example, if you are queer, is okay. And no one has the right to take that identity from you! That the internalized ideas of how someone should be are not always correct or right. Not for you, at least. Stuff like that.

[multi-fxndom446]

Lullaby

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Reader

Warning: literally just so much fluff, you’re welcome. He is already unmasked here.

Summary: Simon loves when you sing to him.

Word count: 1.1K

This was requested by @offbrandmeowmix I hope I did you request justice🫶🏻

To say Simon was tired was an understatement. He was exhausted, sore and overall just felt like collapsing where he stood.

All he had on his mind as he unlocked the door to his apartment was his bed. All he wanted to do was fall onto it and go to sleep and he was certain there was nothing in the world that could deter him from doing exactly that.

He was so confident in that up until the moment he closed the door behind him. He rested against it for another moment trying to gain courage to move forward but then stopped all together when he heard it.

Your sweet voice drifting through the usually quiet apartment. His mind that was once made up on his bed was now set on seeing you.

From the sounds of it you were practicing a song on the piano he had. A piano he had bought solely so you would sing more in his apartment, so you could fill the silence that used to consume him.

Not that he would ever admit it.

He walked up behind you as quietly as possible to not startle you, lest you stop playing. He underestimated every time how lost you got while singing and you didn’t hear a thing.

He watched you as you played through the song, eyes closed as you swayed in your seat softly. His eyes glanced over the little piano that wasn’t at all what you deserved.

One day, he’d buy you a grand piano. He’d put it in the living room of the house the both of you would live in. He could imagine it now, your voice floating through the house while your future kids watched in astonishment.

He watched you in utter adoration, any pain or soreness he had been feeling was long gone the longer he gazed at you.

Now it was his turn to get so lost in your singing that he didn’t notice when you turned to him. He only realized when he heard you gasp and bring a hand to your heart.

“Simon!” You let out a deep breathe. “When did you get home I wasn’t expecting you-?”

The moment your eyes connected with his he dropped his bag and kneeled to the ground. His arms wrapped around your waist as his head fell to your lap and his body immediately relaxed into you.

Your hands quickly came up to run through his hair and he let out a sigh of content. “Rough day?” You asked him softly but he only hummed in response.

His eyes closed while he listened to you hum softly. Something you did often. He learned very quickly that there was hardly ever a moment that you were quiet, you were always singing or humming in some way.

At first he thought it was a bit much. He’d come home and depending on your mood you could either be singing softly to yourself or sometimes he’d be greeted by you singing to him while you ran to him to wrap your arms around him.

He used to think he’d grow sick of it and at first looked forward to the days you’d go home but it immediately changed when he’d come home to cold dark silence.

He thrived on the days when he’d come home and you’d surprise him by being there, the lights on as you continued on with whatever you had been doing. It always lifted a weight off him when he heard you.

“Why don’t we go lay down?” You asked him softly, nails still scratching his head just right. He grunted in disapproval. “Come on, I know this isn’t comfortable for you.”

“I’m comfortable wherever you are.” He muttered against you and you laughed. The sound alone enough to lull him to sleep. He would spend the rest of his days making you laugh, just to hear the sweet sound everyday.

When you noticed the way his breathe started to grow shallower as he fell asleep you nudged him. As much as you hated waking him up, you knew he wouldn’t appreciate the crick in his neck when he woke up next.

“Alright, c’mon big guy.” You tried with all your strength to pull him to his feet but he was very good at dragging you down with him. “Simon.” You laughed and he let out a reluctant sigh before standing to his feet and letting you drag him to the bedroom.

“Long mission.” He grumbled to you while you pulled off his shirt and let him crawl into bed. You joined him quickly and pulled the blanket closer while he maneuvered so he was laying between your legs, his head on your stomach while his arms wrapped themselves back around your waist. “Sing to me?”

You smiled, fingers carding through his hair again. He never asked for you to sing to him so you knew he must be tired.

The comforting silence was drowned out by your soft voice singing a lullaby. Instantly he felt the tendrils of sleep wrapping around him like a warm hug.

As silly as it was, the lullaby you were singing to him was ‘you are my sunshine.’ Something he may have felt embarrassed about had it not soothed him to sleep so easily.

He was sure if any of his friends saw the display, he’d never hear the end of it but he couldn’t find it in him to care. Not when your hands were still playing with his hair softly and your voice filled his chest with a warmth he had never felt until he met you.

When you finished he took in a deep breathe and asked a question that had been on his mind the moment he realized he hated coming home to an empty apartment.

“Move in with me?” Your fingers stopped and he tightened his hold just a little in anticipation. He wondered if he should take it back say he was kidding, tell you to forget about it. He almost did but then your fingers started up again.

“Okay.” You whispered, leaning down to press a soft kiss to his head.

Simon never thought he’d like to be greeted by someone singing to him but he could not picture the rest of his life any other way.

More specifically, he could not picture his life without you singing to him.

~~

Short and sweet I hope yall enjoyed:)

[optimisticartistic]

so here's a fun thought for everyone

Why the FUCK doesn't Kayne want Arthur to know anything about the King in Yellow?

It's tricky to spot over the course of Malevolent as an ongoing canon, but when you look back at the pieces there's a very interesting pattern forming.

First and foremost, the King is (functionally) dead. John's memories of the King's actual life are inconsequential to the point of nonexistent, and Yellow doesn't have any. Given that we know now that Kayne can travel freely between the Dark World and other realities, something no other god is suggested to be able to just yet, we can infer that Kayne put Yellow in the Dark Place explicitly to remove his memories. So there's no longer any first-hand accounts of what the King's motives were/are.

Any humans who could explain the King's motives are dead, and the ones who might have had a reasonable guess is removed. Emily is dead. Amanda is dead.

(Side note: HEY ISN'T THERE ONLY LIKE ONE OTHER HUMANOID THAT JOHN CAN'T DESCRIBE)

Anna is dead.

The Butcher, who has been previously involved with Eldritch Bullshit and may have even held clues as to what was happening with the overall state of the gods, is dead.

Larson, who was an active researcher of eldritch deities, was put in too much pain to function and removed from the scenario entirely. Yellow, who was still sympathetic to Arthur and may have been able to be swung around as an ally, is likewise removed.

(Charlie, who was just in the wrong place at the wrong time and knows nothing, gets yote for funsies.)

So, the only person Arthur has to rely on about information on the other gods becomes Kayne.

Every time Arthur meets Kayne in person, he is in a compromised position and unable to follow up on his own questions

The first time is 20, right after the prison pits, immediately off-kilter because of Faroe's music box and her song, and Kayne immediately distracts him with his own agenda, pushing the idea of Arthur being special, of the King winning, and he gives Arthur the knife - while prompting him on how to use it, as well as how to summon him again.

The second time is Coda, where Arthur is actively dying, and not only does Kayne continue to keep him off-balance by forcing him to beg for John, he keeps Arthur even further off-balance by forcing him to take the entirely unnecessary deal to get "John without his memories" back. And then he spends all of S3 obsessing about John and too distracted to care further than Larson.

The third time is 40 and Intermezzo, where he is witness to Everything Going To Shit, and at this point has actually developed some learned helplessness around Kayne: he no longer pushes back, except to ask relevant questions.

Kayne constantly undermines John, making it difficult for Arthur to feel like he can rely on him in Kayne's presence. He insults John, makes it difficult to describe him and drops references that John can't understand to put his intelligence into question, putting John on the back foot and into compromised social positions. Revealing the cruel things John has done in unflattering lights (forcing John to perform them in the Dark World and making him sound proud of them in 40) and outright orchestrating the divorce in Intermezzo with the entire 'I'll remove his memories for you' debacle. He puts John in a position where Arthur has legitimate reason to doubt his honesty and intentions, and uses that to further undermine John in Arthur's eyes.

I had more points but I lost my train of thought. anyway i am fucking frothing at the mouth about this, what are we missing about the King??

[bluesworldd]

𐀶 ՙ 🎸 · love love love

↳ pairing: hobie brown x reader.

↳ cw/tw: not proofread.

↳ genre: fluff but with emotions ig.

↳ synopsis: “love is underrated” -mac miller

↳ blue says: definitely not inspired by mac miller. enjoy.

spoilers ahead !

┄┄ ︰ ┄୨୧┄ ︰ ┄┄

it was almost like a sense of purpose.

well not almost

it is.

his love for you and the love you gave back— yes that was his sense of purpose. it wasnt supposed to be in the beginning. hobie was doing just fine before you, making his music, laughing off with his friends, and saving countless people. this was something he did on a daily and was what he thought his sense of purpose was.

hobies never been in love.

well thats not true, hobie loves everyone in his life and doesn’t know where he would be without them. but this was different.

never has the love he had for others take up a hundred percent of his mind.

never has it made him an irrational person, never has it made him cry thinking you would leave over a petty argument.

never has it made him write countless of songs trying to express the innumerable things you made him feel.

to put it simply you made an impact on his life. so much so, that you made him think about where he was before you and looking back it was a huge blur now. he’s had plenty of memorable moments but the ones he had with you seemed to have outshine the others. you overall seemed to have outshine everyone, thats what made him so attracted to you in the first place.

oddly enough hobie couldn’t put it into words. that feeling when first met you, he thought of it like a passing shooting star, something that happens rarely— but than it came again, and again, until it became permanent. through all of blissful peace, tearful arguments, heartwarming make-ups. it was always there.

that same sense of purpose.

to always continue loving you no matter the moment, no matter how one or the other is currently feeling then and there because no matter the circumstances hobie will always love you. only you.

“you alright?” your tired voice yawned. you shuffled, turning around so that your face would be met with hobies chest. “of course i am” he whispered. thats all you needed to hear before you fell soundless into slumber.

“i love you” he knew you were already fast asleep again but he couldn’t help himself. “more than you know” listening to your muffled snores, hobie drifted to sleep. you being the only thought in his head.

┄┄ ︰ ┄୨୧┄ ︰ ┄┄

©️bluesworldd 2023 || All rights reserved. Do not repost, reupload, translate, modify, copy, or claim my work as your own.

[lady-boketto]

Hello friend, I have a request if you're up for it , it can be a as long or short as like. How would a first kiss would go between Senshi and a (gender neutral) bard?

Senshi x Gn!Bard Reader (Dungeon Meshi)

(A/n: Thank you so much for the request! Senshi makes my heart flutter so much it's crazy but anyway, Enjoy reading!)

The group finally found a safe place to rest for the night after a particular rough battle, that left everyone tired and desperate for a decent meal and a good night's rest.

As the group finished settling in for the night, Senshi found it to be the right time to start cooking a meal for everyone since he thought it would be the least he could do for the people he grew so fond of ever since he joined, his gaze softened as it shifted towards where you set up your sleeping bag, your figure already pulling out your instrument to begin to pluck some inspiration in hopes of making a new tune to play for the group.

Senshi had come to realize how much you joy you put into other's lives by soothing them with calming melodies or with a lively tune, he is a little ashamed to admit he didn't care much for your songs when he first met you but with time he has come to enjoy every note you play.

While he’s busy working away trying his best to prepare and cook dinner, he’s also listening to you play while he’s peeling or chopping vegetables with a small smile and a slight tap of his foot in beat of the tune.

Just as you play the last note to complete the song as the noise fades into the background, Senshi calls out to the group that the food is ready and he always gives before he takes, so he ends up serving you the first plate of food and then everyone else before making himself one. He loves watching everyone expression as they enjoy the meal he cooked and he especially is delighted when he sees your eyes light up as you take a bite and compliment how good it tastes, it makes him proud that he can bring you as much joy as you bring him.

It’s only when everyone is done eating and is winding down for the night, that Senshi glances once more in your direction only to find you gently cleaning and maintaining the overall wellbeing of your instrument, that he finds himself stuck in his own thoughts about his feeling towards you. Now, Senshi is a clever man and he can recognize when he has a crush but it’s another story when dealing with said crush, since he has been isolated from people and he can be quite blunt at times, he worries that some how he will say the wrong thing and you will be upset with him but that doesn’t stop him from showing you with his actions how much he cares.

You notice how Senshi seems troubled since he is grumbling how he always does when he’s thinking and offer to let him sit by your side and even offer to put him at ease with a song if he wanted but as Senshi moves to sit with you, there’s a slight alarm in your mind as he moves to take off his helmet, a simple act to make the situation more serious than you previously thought.

But as you move your legs you properly turn to face him, you are relieved to hear Senshi’s deep calming voice,

“You fought well today, I’m glad you only had minor injuries. ”

As you are thanking him for worrying about you while being slightly flustered, you notice how he seems to want to talk to you more but can’t seems to find the words to keep the conversation going, so you compliment him on dinner to which he replies with a genuine smile as he rubs his hands together nervously before you continue to talk to him while placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“I was worried about you as well, and I couldn’t let anything happen to the person who enjoy my music the most. ”

Your words catch him off guard with your words and actions as his eyes grow wider while he adverts his gaze towards the floor, before taking a moment to recollect his thoughts to think of a response and deciding that he should let you know his feelings towards you rather than let them keep flooding his mind with ‘what if’s’

“Listen, I know we've only known each other for a short time but there's something that I'd want to tell you before we continue traveling in the dungeon... ”

Senshi pauses for a brief moment to recollect his thoughts, before shifting his gaze towards the floor in front of him, becoming a bit more determine as he continues talking

"I've grown to enjoy your company more as the days pass and, how I find myself looking forward to your music and the sound of your voice... it's something I find myself looking forward to these days. "

He admits before watching for your reaction to his confession and when he finds you are as equally as flustered as he is, Senshi suddenly becomes more nervous but when he notices you are not rejecting him, he gains a more confidence to move closer to you, gently making eye contact and leaning forward

“Senshi…”

You breathe as you find yourself also leaning in towards him and your lips both hover over each other’s, you can feel the tension as you both slowly close your eyes and leaning in to seal the deal. As your soft lips find Senshi’s, he raises his hand to cup the side of you cheek as he melts more into the kiss, as you pull away for air that moment feel cut short but when you open your eyes to see Senshi’s brown eyes connecting with your own, filled with awe as his gaze flickers between your eyes and lips with a content smile on his face before he speaks, his voice filled with a fondness you can only describe as loving.

“Whenever I hear your songs, it feels like I’m home. ”

[first-edition]

Fox and the Hound

Chapter 11

Sum-Joffrey wants to send a message to your family after your brother embarrasses him, so he marries you off to his most unwanted man in his court, the hound. But will this marriage truly be a statement for an eyesore, or will it grow into something more. 

Cw for chapter- talk of previous forced marriage, mention of death, description of blood and gore, description of prostitution, mention or beating, 18+ words and themes overall. Slight angst.

Slightly prof read sorry for any errors

Read previous chapter here

You sit your back against Sandors chest as  he steers the horse you both sit on. You're wrapped in his cloak keeping you warm, the sun peeking up over the mountains, the first light of day breaking as you see the smoke from the burning ships in Kings landing behind you. 

Sandor keeps a firm arm around your waist holding the horse's reins with the other. 

“I know where we can go.” you say. 

“Mm.” he grunts. 

“Home..my home.” you say 

“Volantis? You want to go east.” he says. You nod. 

“Hm” he responds lightly, turning the horse. 

“Where are you going?” you ask. 

“South…There's a merchant ship yard where you'll be able to get on a boat and then take a carriage. The next merchant ship yard is miles off so we'll be riding for a while but we should get there before dark.” he says.

“You're coming with me sandor.” you speak it as more of a demand than a request. 

“I'm not.” he replies. 

“You are.” you fight back. 

“Not.” 

“Yes.” “No.”

“Sandor clegane as your wife, mother of your child, and princess of the very place WE are headed for, I'm ordering you to join me.” you snap. He stops the horse and looks down to you. Before looking back up and continuing the horse forward. A small victorious smile hits your face. 

“Volantis it is.. I guess.” he says you rest your head against his chest in peace, his arm around your waist tightens a bit pulling you closer to him. 

“What do you think will happen to king's landing?” You ask. He scoffs at your question giving no fucks to whats to happen to the place. 

“If Stannis has taken it he’ll be putting a bounty on everyone who flead, me, you servant, commoners. And if not there will still be bounty and the lannisters will still be a bag of cunts.” he says gruffly. 

“When they killed my brother…they sent his head to my family with a note that I was to be married to you or the fate my brother withstood would soon be mine…” you trial off. Sandor can feel a slight pain in his heart as you speak about the forced marriage you two had shared how much he felt like he didn't want you, how he thought you were another stuck up useless little princess how badly he treated you and yet you still stood at that alter and kissed him and even invited him into your bed…but it was out of fear..isn't it?” 

“Do you remember when we wed?” you ask placing your hand over his that rests on your stomach. 

“Yes.” he says coldly, mostly afraid of the awful things you are going to say about it. 

“I remember how nice you looked. That the armory had made you the golden armor and seamstress had sewn a new cloak, were you comfortable?” you ask. Sandor knits his eyebrows together in confusion. 

“No.” he answers anyway. 

“Me either the dress cersi chose for me was corseted to hell, and itchy but…looking back on it i don't think i was scared…I want to tell myself that only married you so my head wouldn't be sent to my mother and father but i can't. I know now that I married you because the gods willed me to love you, I was never afraid of you like everyone else and  becoming yours was the best thing that has happened to me in a while.” you say looking up at him.

He leans down to you pressing a kiss to your lips before you sit back against him and continue the ride twords the merchant shipyard. You hum the song your mother would always sing to you to help you sleep and eventually you find yourself drifting to sleep as the swaying of the horse and the steady sound of Sandors beating heart lulls you to drift, it helps that you'd been awake all night fearing for you life. 

—-----

You wake up to hear the same humming you fell asleep to, too sandors humming the song now having got it stuck in his head after hearing it three times before you fell under the sandman's curse. 

The sun is high in the sky now most likely around 1 pm but it's slightly cast out but the snowing clouds. 

“How far are we?” you ask, looking around tiredly rubbing your eyes with the back of your hand. 

“We'll be passing the harvest hall in a moment.” he says as the forest path opens to a clearing, seeing the small town full of people and sellers. 

“We have to pass through prince’s pass and get on the ships at sun spear if we want to arrive in volantis by the day after tomorrow.” he says 

“Sun spear? Dornish country.” you say. Sandor nods. 

A crowd of people passing to the square of the town stops the horse. They all yell about some foreign scum throwing someone into the frozen mud. 

“What's going on?” you ask.

“Does Not concern us.'' Sandor grunts as he heels the horse to move but it doesn't as there's too many people blocking the way out. 

“A SQUIRE FROM KINGS LANDING WAS FOUND IN MY BARN!” a man yells at you frowning in confusion. A break in the crowd allows you to see the accused. Joss. 

“S-sandor, that's joss.” you speak out. 

“So..” he says. 

“Let me down," you say, pulling away from him. 

“y/n no. the villagers will have their way with him.” he speaks. 

“He’s just a boy!” you exclaim. Holding onto the horse as you try to get down off the large clydesdale. 

“Fuck me…wait.” he says and easily hops off the horse before holding onto you lifting you up and off steadying you on the ground. You pick up your dress before running through the crowd. 

“Damn! Y/N!” Sandor yells running after you shoving people out of the way to get to you. 

“S-Stop! Stop!” you yell out as a man kicks joss. 

“Oh looky here a little lady has come to play.” He says. 

“Please stop, that's my husband's squire.” you say. 

“This little shit was hiding in my barn bringing his shame with him when the Lannister found him here they’ll have all our heads!” the farmer yells. 

“Th-the lannisters?” you ask. 

“Yeah pretty girl they won, tywin took them out!” he yells and everyone cheers. 

“Please just.. Let him go. I have money and as long as he's safe.” you plead. 

“You a Lannister bitch?!” he asks. 

“No..i-” you're about to clarify. 

“Y/n!” Sandor calls you entering the middle clearing. 

The man turns to sandor giving you a chance to hurry to joss wrapping your cape around him keeping him as warm as you can. 

“You're sandor clegane.” the man speaks then turns his attention to you helping joss to his feet. 

“Give us the quire and we’ll be on our way.” Sandor speaks with his hand resting on the handle of his sword. 

“The queen wants your head clegane the money I’d get for that is worth more than a scrawny squire.” the man speaks. 

“What do they call you?” Sandor asks. 

“Byran.” the man answers. 

“You're not getting my head bryan but ill be getting yours if you don't step aside.” Sandor huffs. Bryan chuckles, putting his hands on his hips puffing out his chest. 

“You can have your squire, for a price.” he speaks again, glaring at your husband. Sandor grumbles in annoyance. 

“Her, your traveling wench. Just a night with that pretty little thing.” Bryan speaks pointing towards you.

Sandor looks at you as you stand with joss as he fetched the horse and is now holding onto the reins for you. 

“She’s not for sale.” Sandor speaks gruffly as he turns back to face the man who just chuckles and shakes his head.

“20 minutes then. I’ll easily go through you to get that tight little cunt wrapped around my cock.” Bryan asks stupidly speaking once more.

Sandor sighs and steps up closer to the man would just hold his ground standing straight regardless of your large intimidating husband towering over him.

“You touch her and I’ll hang you from that tavern overhang with a noose made out of your own guts.” Sandor speaks sternly. The man just laughs, turning his head away before he opens his mouth to speak again but is cut off by sandor.

“You think I’m joking?” Sandor replies but before he gives the man a chance to speak he punches him square in the jaw, his armored glove cutting into the man’s jaw slicing gashes into the man’s skin. The man falls into the mud gasping and coughing in pain as his broken, bloody jaw hangs loosely. Bryan writhes in pain on the ground. 

“Come on.” Sandor says to you as he walks twords you. 

“Get on I'll walk.” he speaks to joss who nods and lifts himself up onto the horse. Sandor  lifts you up and onto the horse before taking the reins to lead you both. 

“Sandor.” you speak looking down to him as you pass through the dissipating crowd. 

“Thank you.” you say. He only grunts compliance making you smile.

NEXT CHAPTER HERE

Taglist- @stephyshadows @germansarechill @urfavbiscuit @daphneyblue @takemeaemond @holb32 @allison-119 @pxstelink @imsolonelyimissyou @myshitaccount @broadsdrinkwhisky

If you’d like to be a part of the taglist please leave a comment

[strniohoeee]

Undefiled

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N is tired of being the butt of every joke with her friends for being a “saint”, so she goes to Matt for help🪷

Warnings⚠️: It’s just cute as shit

This was for my request asking for the reader to ask Matt to be her first kiss🥹

Song for the imagine: Sparks- Coldplay

I knew I wasn’t experienced much, but that never made me feel any type of way. It was completely normal….everyone experiences these milestones at different times in their lives

I never thought twice about it, not till I made some friends who already had crazy sexual experiences. I always sat there listening, but never saying a word. At first this went unnoticed

But the more they spoke about, and the more I grew quiet they would start to give me certain glances. Glances that kind of made me feel left out, and like a fool.

My friends had been spending the night at my house like most girls our age did. And with these sleepovers came talks of boys, and talks of boys meant stories of their interactions. Interactions I’ve never had, therefore I would never have anything to say

“How come you never have anything to say?” One of my friends asked bringing me back to reality

“Hmm?” I said peeling my eyes away from the floor to look at her

“Everytime we talk about our experiences with guys you just go mute” she said

“Oh…well I've never had any of those crazy experiences, so I just listen in” I told her in all honesty

“Oh well that’s okay” she said shrugging her shoulders, which put me at ease

“I’m sure you’ve at least had your first kiss. Tell us about that” my other friend said

“I uh actually never kissed a boy before” I said avoiding eye contact

“Oh…” she responded looking around at everyone else

“Held hands?”

I shook my head no

“Hugged?”

I shook my head no again

“Damn girl nothing?” She had asked me

“Nothing…” I said shrugging my shoulders

“She’s a fucking saint, she has virgin practically written all over her” one of my other friends said

“Hey! That’s not nice” the other one said

“I mean it’s the truth….she obsesses over guys basically drooling over them, but can’t even strike up a conversation with them, why would you think she’d ever kissed someone” she responded laughing

“Ehhh that is true” the other girl said laughing with her

“She’ll probably stay shy and inexperienced forever” she said

“Could you not” I said with a straight face

“I’ll stop when you find a guy, and finally kiss him” she said rolling her eyes

That whole interaction really hurt me, and made me feel like shit. I was just waiting for the right guy to come alone for me to kiss. There was nothing wrong with that, but the whole interaction with them constantly played in my head. I had distanced myself from them as I really didn’t want to be their punching bag for “innocent virgin” jokes.

I started to hang out with my other friends Chris, Matt and Nick because they never brought up things like that, and made me feel comfortable.

Today the triplets had asked me to come over and hangout with them. I agreed, and we were all chilling in Nick's room when the interaction with my “friends” started to play in my head. I was looking at the three of them

I mean they are good candidates….well not Nick because he’s gay, mmm Chris maybe but he’s a player and that’s too much for me, so I finally settled on Matt.

He was so cute, shy, in tune with his emotions, nice and just overall everything I liked in a guy. I’d say I had a bit of a crush on him. I mean what’s not to like??

I was deep in thought about how I would approach the situation, or even if I ever would.

“Hey you okay?” Chris asked looking at me, and thus made me snap out of thought

“Yeah sorry I was just thinking” I said smiling at him

“Thinking what?” Nick asked

“Thoughts” I said laughing

“Okayyy weirdo” Nick said laughing

I laughed with them, and just continued to think about what I wanted to do. I mean I wanted to talk with Matt, but I was going back and forth in my head, and I started to get anxious because of this

“Hey Matt, is there any way I could chat about something with you?” I just randomly said. My mouth was moving faster than my brain was

“Yeah sure” he said, getting up to head out the room so we could chat. We had stepped outside right outside of Nick's bedroom

As we stepped outside I closed the door, starting to get even more anxious

“Are you alright?” He asked once I finally stood next to him

“Um yes I’m okay, but something been on my mind” I told him

“Well I’m like the therapist of the group, so lay it on me” he said laughing

“This is super personal, and I’m not sure if you’ll get uncomfortable” I said wincing at my own words

“I would never! Go on” he responded nodding his head at me to continue

“Well um…..so basically I have these friends who are very experienced as far as sexual intimacy, and they’ve been making me feel some type of way” I told him, but before I could finish he cut me off

“Screw them who gives a shit. Virginity is a fucked up social construct” he told me

“No I know, but umm they just always call me a saint and innocent because I’ve never kissed a guy. I mean I’ve never even held a guys hand, or hugged one in a romantic way” I said back to him

“Ohhh I see” he said looking a bit confused

“I was wondering if you’d be willing to maybe be my first kiss?” I asked him. Cringing internally at home embarrassed I felt

“You want me to be your first kiss? I mean yes I’ll do it, but me?” He asked puzzled

“Yes you! I feel like you’re the only person that I’d enjoy kissing plus I know you” I told him blushing a little bit

“Oh uhh thanks” he said also blushing

“Okay sooo teach me how to kiss” I said jumping straight into it

“Well first come closer” he said, and to this I walked directly in front of him waiting for further instructions

“And then uhh…you could lick your lips, but you’re wearing chapstick so you’re good” he said as he licked his own lips a little bit

“I’ll take the lead” he said

“Well duh Matt I’ve never done this” I said laughing at him

“Right….sorry” he said shaking his head

He looked into my eyes, and then down at my lips. My heart was racing so fast I could hear it in my ear drums, and I’m sure he could hear it too.

He placed his hand on my cheek, and slowly leaned in tilting his head to the right a little bit, shutting his eyes. So I such my eyes as well and leaned in slightly

Matt pressed his lips against mine, and for a moment I just stood with no movement, until finally my brain turned on.

I kissed him back, and then we separated for a second and went back to kiss again.

When we pulled away my face was blushed, my pupils were dilated, and I’m sure my heart was about to burst out of my chest.

“How was that?” He asked looking into my eyes

“That was perfect” I said smiling at him

“Want one more for good measure?” He asked with a sly smile

“How could I resist” I said rolling my eyes in a playful way

So he went back and kissed me a few more times. That was until Chris banged on the glass of the window, and when we looked over his jaw was dropped

“OH MY FUCKING GOD” he screamed laughing like a schoolgirl and running to get Nick

“This kid” Matt said laughing as we walked back into the house.

The End

Whoever requested this I HOPE YOU LIKEEEE, and now back to writing. I got 9 more stories to go😁🤭

-J💅🏽

[snickerdoodie]

“Need you now”

Summary: The Tornado Wranglers weren’t known for staying in one place for longer than a few days; too many storms to chase, fans to see, family’s to help. It required constant movement and you knew that, but it was never easy for you or Tyler.

Pairing: Tyler Owen’s x f!reader

A/N: Funny story about this fic, I actually based it on my grandma and late grandpa. It makes me so teary eyed every time she tells me the story but I love it sm😭. I’m not even gonna lie, I didn’t really know if I wanted to post this cuz it just…felt like it didn’t turn out right. Feel free to listen to the song while reading, it’s “Need You Now” by Lady A. Not proofread, per usual. But I hope you guys like it!

“Picture perfect memories, scattered all around the floor

Reaching for the phone, 'cause I can't fight it any more

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind

For me, it happens all the time”

You knew what you were getting yourself into when you started dating Tyler Owen’s; a famous YouTuber, Tornado Wrangler, and an overall state superstar and hero, but nothing prepared you for all this. The waiting, the longing, the empty bed side, the constant anxiety that maybe today was the day he wouldn’t come home from a chase, it was all awful.

And here you were again, laying in bed alone, tucked in the shriveled up covers and blankets staring blankly at the brain dead tv show with nothing but numbness. It’s been 2 weeks since you’ve last seen and heard from Tyler, with every passing day you miss the toothy grin, his warm, strong embrace. You miss it all. It’s like they say; you never know how much something means to you until it’s gone, and right now, you couldn’t miss him more.

Too busy caught up in your thoughts, you barely process the blaring sound of your cell phone going off. Someone was calling you. In a slumped up ball of blankets, you lazily pick up the phone and glance at the caller ID, not expecting the man you missed most to be the face you see. A wave of emotion hits you at the photo. It was a selfie of the two of you cuddled up in the gleaming sunlight by the bed of a lake. Clothes damp and hair wet, you both decided to bask in the blaring sunbeams as a way to dry off and stay warm.

As hastily is possible, you hit the green accept button. With shaking hands and a wobbly smile, you bring it up to your ear, not even registering the sweet muffled melody coming through the other end.

“Oh my god, Tyler,” you blurt, voice nearly scratchy, “God, I’ve missed you so much…I-“ It’s only when you stop to take a breath that you hear it.

“It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now

Said I wouldn't call, but I've lost all control and I need you now

And I don't know how I can do without, I just need you now,”

As you feel your throat close up and eyes brim with tears, you stay silent. In your blindness to hear Tyler’s voice again, you completely missed the pianos intro, deaf to the lyrics all together. But once you hear the chorus, you melt away. The once welled up tears cascade down your cheeks like a broken dam; no matter how many you wipe away they keep falling. The swelling of your chest becomes nearly painful, trying to hold back the choked sobs that threaten to escape, but it’s a lost cause.

In one last hope, you put the phone on speaker and bring your legs up to your chest, burying your head between your knees as one of your hands holds the cell up. Just as you do, a blubbering whimper travels from your throat as a sob follows it soon after. As the song continues to flow around the room, the quiet but definite wails carry on, an unstoppable sound that breaks Tyler’s heart through the staticky reception of the call.

Minutes pass by as your weeping slows to small sniffles, eyes closed as you focus on the last remaining lyrical bits of the song.

“Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothin' at all,”

You don’t trust yourself to speak, the emotions still raw and twirling in your mind, a powerful force that only one person can tame.

“Hey baby...”

You nearly burst into another onslaught of tears at the sound of his voice. It’s quiet and nearly as syrupy as your own, and unbeknownst to you, Tyler had too, lost himself at the sound of you. How could he not? With every twister he went through, he always thought one thing; What if doesn’t come home? What if this is the one that finally takes the Tornado Wrangler down, leaving you with nothing to mourn over. The thought alone gave him goosebumps.

“Tyler..” you whimper, chest swelling at the relief of hearing him once again.

“I don’t even know how to start tellin’ you how nice it is to hear your voice again…god I’ve missed you, sweetheart,” With a smile, you repeat back.

“I’ve missed you too, Tyler…I miss you being here with me..” If you close your eyes tight enough, you can really picture him here with you. His breath winding down your neck as his stubble pricks the side of your face. The smell of his cologne mixing in with the scent of your perfume. Listening closely, you hear shuffling then a deep breath, before he finally speaks,

“I’m coming home soon, baby, I promise you I am.”

“I just need you now,

Oh, baby, I need you now.”

Three posts in one day?!? A new record for me. Lmfao I actually wrote this one today and had a crisis if I wanted to post it or not. I know this song is about heartbreak and wanting someone back after they’ve left…but I wanted to try and make it about longing, like the story my grandma always tells me. I hope you guys like this fic! I honestly might rewrite it on a later date, but I was kinda texting the waters with it. As always, comment if you liked or disliked something, inbox is still open!

[chaotic-mystery]

WHERE YOU LEFT ME

Pairing: Frankie Morales x reader

Summary: You meet Frankie for a date and reminisce about your relationship.

Content Warnings: MAJOR character death. No movie AU but fuck Tom. This is overall angst heavy and please take care of yourself. Grief & loss, sadness, memories, I think that’s it? It’s just overall a bittersweet and tragically lovesick story. There’s no physical descriptions of reader other than wearing a black dress at one point and having hair that tickles Frankie’s nose. no y/n used

Authors Note: hello my babies I am finally dropping this. It’s been an idea I had for months and I almost scrapped it but then I thought, no! Post it anyway! So here we go. It’s heavily inspired by Tim McGraw by Taylor Swift but it’s not required to listen to it to read the story. (Although if you’re like me and love a good cry, i recommend listening) I’ll meet you at the end of this with tissues and candy, okay? 🩵 thank you @pr0ximamidnight for beta reading this for me and I’m sorry for making you sob. || wc: 1.3k|| beautiful divider by @/saradika-graphics 🩵

“Hi honey, I missed you. Hope you aren’t too mad I’m runnin’ late.”

You smile and sit next to Frankie on the ground right on top of the red picnic blanket, food spread out from corner to corner. The assortment of favorite sweets and dishes makes you smile harder, getting comfortable right next to him.

“Finally went out shopping today for the first time in a while. I hadn’t seen my friends in so long, I’m surprised they answered when I offered to go out. We took the backroads home and it reminded me of when your truck used to get stuck back in high school, those long ass nights we should’ve been home studying but you wanted to go for a drive. You’d take us out to the lake and dance with me. Remember that? It was fun before my dad caught us and chased us back to the truck.”

You giggle and rest against him, blinking a few times as a breeze of cold and crisp October air rushes by you. Licking your lips, you continue.

“I found a note from years ago when I was looking for those one pair of shoes you know I hate wearing, the ones I have to wear when-”

You cut yourself off, not wanting to bring up that day. Not yet.

Pulling the folded piece of lined paper out of your coat pocket, you sniffle from the chilly weather and begin to read aloud the note. “This was from the day you were shipping out for basic and god was I pissed at you. We woke up and realized summer was gone, we were adults.”

“Frankie, when you read this you’ll probably be on the way to Texas, and I’ll be in Georgia, right where you left me. I told your mama I’d write to you every chance I got, and I mean that. That also means when I’m mad at you for leaving. I hope when you’re lying awake in your cot at night, you look up and our song starts to play, that one Tim McGraw song. You remember what I was wearing, the perfume embedded in my skin, the way my hair tickled your nose when you’d hug me.

By no means is this a goodbye letter. I’m in it forever with you, Frankie. I want you to come back home safely so we can start the family we’ve always wanted. Why did you have to leave me? Why was this the best solution for us? We were making it, we were fine. We were good. I was happy with our little apartment and my shitty 9-5 job while you worked on cars. Promise me you’ll come home safe. I need you here with me.

I love you endlessly, you have no idea. You make it hard to be mad when I remember how you’d tell me my eyes put the stars to shame every time I looked at you. That’s still a lie to this day. I’m already counting down the days until you’re back with me and I thought it would somehow make it easier but it doesn’t. I’ll be waiting right here for you, wearing that little black dress you love so much.

We’ll start our family and get that house on the outskirts of town like you told me we would. I already have dog names picked out for the dog we’re gonna adopt too.

P.s. the ring doesn’t have to be too expensive.

Love you always.”

Taking a deep breath in, you wipe your tears on your corduroy brown pants, looking around at all the people walking by in the distance. Grabbing a green grape from the plate next to your leg, you chew it up and rest back against your hands, the soft blanket shielding you from the cold ground.

“I got a new job a few months ago, I forgot to tell you. I'm in HR now which is fun. I get to listen to people complain about who ate whose lunch, hire more clowns who hope to climb the social ladder, that kind of thing. It has its good and bad days. Honestly though, it makes me forget about all the shit I have going on in my head. I get to focus on everyone else but myself for a day. I know, I know, an office job?”

You sit up straight and cross your legs before continuing.

“I needed something to pay the bills and I couldn’t stay a waitress forever. The tips were good but I couldn’t afford our apartment on that alone. Robert still calls me from time to time asking if I want a Friday night shift. I didn’t think he’d remember how I used to love those. You’d come in after being with Santi and Ben all day and want beers while you stayed until we closed, always wanting to be near me with what little time we did have. Just seeing you sitting on that barstool watching college football, eating those disgusting cheese sticks was enough to make me keep going for the night.”

And it was.

Frankie being there when he was off duty meant a lot to you.

You kneel down in front of him and you can feel the tears pricking your eyes once more as your scarf blows to the right a little.

“I left a note on your mama’s porch the other day. I know she doesn’t live there anymore but I just, it was the first time I’d gone back to your street since, ya know. By now I’m sure you know what I wrote in it, but just in case you don't. I hope you still think about me when you think Tim McGraw. It’ll bring you back to that place of us out there by the lake with my head on your chest, dancing all night like two lovesick teenagers. I hope it makes you happy, Frankie. I hope you know it means everything to me, still. After all these years.”

You finally crack and break down, leaning your forehead on the picnic blanket, the tears soaking into the fabric immediately. Muffled and choked out sobs leap from your lips and you clutch your throat, trying to calm yourself down enough to breathe.

“I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to you, Frankie. You left me here with n-nothing.” You fiddle with your fingers and rub the spot on your ring finger where a ring should be sitting. Yet only a faint line from the ring Frankie won you out of a quarter machine was left. It didn’t feel right wearing it without him so you gave it back on that terrible day in September when the entire month seemed flooded out by tears. You tucked it right in his jacket pocket before you left.

That was the worst day of your life.

You sigh deeply and touch the cold granite headstone, the smallest picture of Frankie looking back at you.

“I love you so much. I’ll be back tomorrow to change your flowers. It’s my first winter without you here and I can’t stop thinking about how cold you must be, baby. I wish you were back in our apartment in my arms how you used to let me hold you.”

Laying down until your face was pressed against the ground, you sniffle again and whimper out as you think about him being cold.

“Frankie, I'm so sorry. I’m sorry I can’t get you out of that wooden box. I hope wherever you are in the universe, you’re safe and warm and can feel all the love I still have for you. There’s just too much left over and I’m not sure what to do with it, honey. What do I do with it? What do I do with all this love that was supposed to last us forever?”

You never did get the ring but you got an endless supply of memories from knowing him and loving him. Truly loving him.

You curl up into a little ball and hold yourself while you continue to cry, twiddling a leaf between your fingers. Eventually the whimpers turned into soft and broken hums of that one Tim McGraw song.

Hugs and kisses and tissues are complimentary 💚

[russellsppttemplates]

I'm in this if you are (Lance Stroll)

Lance wants to show you how wonderful love can be

Note: english is not my first language. this is a long piece that I hope will keep the interactions back up (I love getting your requests and overall having you interact with the posts and having some random thoughts shared too!), so I hope you enjoy this piece as this is my first Lance request * nervous giggles *

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

Tw: mentions (bad) past relationships, curse words

my masterlist

"Is it okay if we meet up at the park instead?", you suggested to Lance over the phone, "it's only a five minute walk from work for me", earning an affirmative answer on the other side of the line as well as a farewell.

Packing your backpack with your laptop and a book you had to bring home for the weekend, switching everything off and ringing your card so you could get yourself out, heading for the park Lance was meeting you at.

It was something new, so you were being cautious. After all, you had fallen for people before who weren't good for you in the end, so you had learnt to keep your distance. But did you hope that maybe this time it would be different. The Canadian young man and you have been spending some time together after meeting through a mutual friend, and today was no different since he had texted you earlier if you would be up for a stroll in the park after you were done from work, having you accept it and even letting yourself feel giddy about it.

Following the directions he gave you, you saw him sitting in the bench like he had told you, getting up once he saw you and coming closer to you, "Hi, how are you?", he said, giving you a big hug and a kiss on the cheek, "Hi, I've been good, very happy that it's Friday so I get the to be home for the weekend. And you, busy day?", you greeted him back and continuing to walk alongside him, "yeah, the meeting was about the last few things we need to sort out before the race next weekend, so it got a bit longer than I expected but it was all good, means I didn't have to wait too long for you, but I did get you these", he said, showing you a small white paper bag, leaving you to open it.

The small sticker that closed the bag was enough to get you to gasp, recognising your favourite bakery chain's logo, "you say they always run out in the shop they have near your office, so I dropped by the one close to the factory to see if they had some and they did", Lance smiled, seeing you smile back at him, "thank you! Do you want to go and enjoy these by the lake?", you suggested, seeing that it wasn't too busy around there.

Sitting down on the dry grass, you and Lance sat in front of eachother, talking about your day and laughing at funny moments from eachother's day while sharing the croissants he had gotten, "thank you, again, you didn't have to", you pointed to the empty bag, whisking any crumbs away from your lips and clothes, "it was only fair that I got to try "the best croissants ever" according to you, and since I had some time to kill before I met you here, and it is always a pleasure to see your eyes sparkle like that", he said softly, noticing the blush on your cheeks and your shyness coming through, taking the hint to keep talking, "and a croissant like this after a long meeting and at a park like this with this company, there's not much more than I want".

.

You were dancing around in the kitchen, waiting for the water to boil so you could put the pasta in, singing to the lyrics before you phone stopped the song and instead made the sound of an incoming FaceTime call, seeing Lance's contact on your screen. "Hi Lance!", you greeted, waving at the screen, "Hey, you, am I catching you at a bad time?", he asked, lighting what looked like a nightsand lamp, "Just making dinner. Is this a good time for you though? You look like you're going to sleep", you cringed, propping your phone since one of the glss containers you had on your counter top so you could put the pasta in and still she Lance while he saw you in shot too, "I wanted to talk to you", he mused, "I saw your text, but they needed me to fix something on the steering wheel and just to be sure I called now because I was afraid you'd be working still and I would interrupt it", he reasoned.

Hoping the LED light that illuminated your working area in the kitchen hid your blushing cheeks, you managed to reply, "I was just checking in with you, seeing how it went. Aren't you tired or in need of sleep? We can talk another day, it's fine", you admitted, even though deep down you were enjoying his (virtual) company, especially seeing him like this, tucked into bed in his pyjamas and looking so handsome and soft, "I'm okay, don't worry", he yawned, "so, what are you cooking?".

Conversation flowed while you cut the vegetables so you could cook them in the pan, sharing the recipe with Lance and coming closer to the phone whenever you were letting things cook on their own, supporting your face on the palms of your hands while your elbows rested on the counter top, doing one final move to plate your pasta, "uhh, that looks good!", Lance exclaimed, seeing you top the dish with some cheese, "it usually tastes good, yeah, and it's also very quick to make. I began just when we started this call and we've been here for- oh, we've been here for nearly an hour! Lance, you could've told me! You probably need to sleep, I'm sorry that I kept you here!", you apologised, guilt overcoming your whole body. You truly didn't think you had been on call with Lance for such a long time, it was truly flowing and, above anything, feeling comfortable.

"You don't have to apoligise, I stayed here because I wanted to be with you and spend time with you, unless you're apologising because I bothered you", he hinted, "No! No, not at all, I loved sort of having you here with me", you hurriedly clarified, "I just didn't want to bother you or your sleep routine, it's really late where you are", you shot him another apologetic look, "I said none of that, no apologising for this anymore. I enjoyed having you here with me too", he smiled softly, "but if I don't go to sleep soon, tomorrow is going to hurt", he reasoned.

Sitting by your table, you propped the phone again against your bottle of water, "sleep is very important, Lanc-", you were interrupted by him, "but I need to know if the pasta is delicious or not, it's only fair", he winked as you rolled your fork on the plate, grabbing bit of everything and trying it, "it's amazing, I can confirm", you said, "you look like a little chipmunk, and your dimple is showing too. Totally worth it staying up this late", he complimented, leaving you to bid him goodbye, "goodnight Lance, have a good sleep", you whispered, switching off the call when Lance gave you the same wishes, giddily smiling at your pasta at his attentiveness, allowing yourself to be swept off your feet.

.

"Was it as good as your pasta, though?", Lance asked you as you walked along the city streets after leaving the restaurant where you had dinner. The small and cosy local restaurant was perfect for another date with Lance, your hand latched in his since you left the restaurant after thanking the owner for a great evening, "I'm not a professional, so this one was better, but my own has potential too, you know?", you giggled, allowing yourself to lean a little bit on Lance, pulling your bodies closer to one another, making him also feel your own easiness around him, which he appreciated. From the moment he met you, he knew you wouldn't be swept off your feet with elaborate dinner dates and fancy invitations to lavish places. Above anything, he noticed you were cautious, not that he thought that you were expecting him to do you any physical harm, but because maybe you had been emotionally hurt before. Because of that, Lance made it his mission to show you what love could be like, how beautiful and how simple two people who care about eachother could develop into something more.

Seeing a flower peeking out of a house fence, Lance couldn't contain himself and he plucked it, making you stop, "Here, look at me, please", he mumbled, tucking the flower behind your ear carefully, his eyes boring into yours, "I really like you, Y/N", he confessed, "and I won't pressure you into anything, I can wait. Damn, I'll wait forever for you if I have to. But I don't want you to go on without knowing this", he smiled hopefully, not knowing your reaction as he hadn't planned to do it like this.

Cupping his cheek, your thumb ran over his cheek, softly touching the corner of his lips in a silent question to know if he too wanted it before you leaned up to kiss him, pressing your lips in his for a tender kiss, pulling back to see eachother's reaction, only to crash his lips against yours passionately.

"I really like you too", you whispered, afraid to disturb the moment between you, earning a chuckle from Lance, "I should hope so, imagine if you were to tell me now that you despised me after that kiss, I don't think I could handle it", he placed his hand on top of his heart, earning him a small slap on his chest, "I'm trying to be serious with you", you whined, "So am I, Y/N, completely serious. I'm in this if you are", he said as he hugged your, kissing your forehead before kissing your lips again, "I think I found a new favourite thing to do".

.

"So you don't want to go?", Lance questioned, "it's not that I don't want to go and see you do what you love, it's the whole thing, Lance", you murmured, "I'd have to fly out on a different day, I'd have to sleep somewhere, and that whole thing needs to be accounted for, I need to sit down and look properly at all of it", you almost hissed at him, not enjoying the tone it came out of your mouth but going with it nonetheless.

"But I can pay for all of that. I am, in fact, paying for all of that, that's why I'm offering you to come to a race weekend", Lance admitted, frustrated that something so simple for him was causing a fight between you, "and that is one of my problems! I don't want you to have to take care of me like that, I can take of myself, I'm not dependent on anyone and I can do things on my own!", you admitted, voice shaky while you looked at him, "I need a minute, please", you said as you felt your eyes grow wetter, excusing yourself to go to your balcony.

You knew Lance had money, a whole lot of it, so much so that, realistically, you coming along with him to the race would go probably unnoticed in his bank balance, but that didn't mean you were totally comfortable with him paying for everything. You could take care of yourself, now you knew that, despite of years of previous boyfriends telling you it would be hard for you to make it on your own and by your own merit. And you were scared, because was this the way this was going to end? Had you been, yet again, blinded by a guy who wanted you to be what he liked, who wanted to build you to the image he wanted and needed you to depict?

Inside, Lance noticed the cold air coming from the small gap of the door to the balcony that you had left open, imagining how much colder it would be for you, standing outside, looking around in hopes to find what he was looking for.

You heard the door squeak as it opened, thinking to yourself it was just the breeze when you heard footsteps, thinking for a second someone had broken into your house uninvited, "I'd prefer if you didn't have a cold", Lance said softly as he draped a blanket over your shoulders carefully, not missing your stunned expression, "you're still here?", you managed to let out, "I, I thought you were going to leave, I didn't think you'd stay", you stuttered, "Why would I leave?", Lance asked and almost immediately he answered his own question: because that's all you've ever known. When things got complicated, they would leave you. So you naturally thought he would do the same.

"Y/N, I'm not going to leave you when we fight", Lance said, keeping himself close to you, holding himself against the railing, "that is a promise I intend on keeping to you, and I'm going to do my absolute best to make sure that I won't break it", he declared, "Can we talk about it though?".

Holding his hand in yours, you nudged him to sit in one of the chairs you had in your balcony, sitting in front of him so you could express what was on your mind, "this is a bad story from past experiences, so if you still want to make that exit, I promise I'll manage and forget what you just side", you suggested playfully, feeling him squeeze you hand tighter in his own, "I've been in bad relationships before, it probably does not come to a surprise to you, but some things still haunt me years after. I used to have a boyfriend that would get me presents, or he would pay for things, and for a bit a just took it down as he was being nice, but he slowly started offering things in exchange of something, like me changing what I wore because I would wear something he got me instead, or change what I ate, who I spent time with, ans slowly everything he somehow offered turned out to be because he thought I couldn't do it on my own, that I wouldn't ever be able to sustain myself independently, so he thought he might as well "help me" and change who I was in the process", you gulped, "and I only realised it later, when his supposed affection for me was only there when I complied with what he asked of me, and the moment I realised was a constant fight, day in day out, where he left and then he would come back and belittle so much into thinking that it was my fault he would leave and we wouldn't solve anything we were fighting about", you confessed, "breaking up wasn't even the hardest part, but the scars that it left me with are still here, that's why I thought you would leave, because you wouldn't want to hear my side and-, fuck", you wiped a tear that insisted on falling, going back to play with Lance's fingers after, "I love you so much, I care about you so much, and you make me feel things I've never felt before without any conditions", you looked up at him, seeing an expression that was a mixture of sadness, anger and maybe some revolt too.

Lance brought your hands together and kissed them, "thank you for sharing that with me, I appreciate it", he began, "and I'm so sorry that some bastard thought it was okay to treat you like that, because it is not", he squeezed your hands, rubbing his thumb on them, "you deserve to feel all the love in the world without anything in it other that love itself. I get to be loved by you and that is one of my biggest blessings, and I'll be damned if I ever make you feel less loved or less appreciated than you deserve. But that promise I made is true, I want us to always talk about something that we don't see eye to eye on, so we can understand the other's perspective, I don't want to run away from anything", he nodded for you to continue, signalling he was done.

"I'm not from the same social or professional sphere that you are, and that makes me wonder about this whole situation, like there isn't a way that I can keep up with all of that travel on my own", you admitted honestly, "and I don't know how I feel about you covering those costs, like, of course I want to go see you do your thing at the track, and be there to support you, to congratulate you when you win and to hold you when things don't go as well, even if it's not all the time, but all of that seems a lot", you explained the situation to the best of your ability.

"Can I go now?", Lance wondered, his hands still holding yours, "I don't want to sound like a prick, or like I'm flashing everyone of how much I have, but it is also true that I don't mind paying for those things. Truly. And I don't do it because I want some change from you in return. I do it because I am fortunately able to and because I want the people I love with me as much as they're able to", he said, moving his hand to caress your cheek, "I never want you to think for a second that anything that I offer, present you with or pay for is a way of manipulating you", he assured, looking for your own reassurance in your eyes.

You shuffled around in your seat, looking into those beautiful brown eyes you loved so much, "thank you", you smiled through your tears, "you don't have to thank me for loving you, I should be the one thanking you for trusting me and for letting me love you".

[always-andromeda]

Hi, I was wondering if you still take requests? If you don't that is perfectly okay with me, I don't mind! But if you can, would you be willing to write headcanons or something about Javier Peña (Narcos) with an s/o that doesn't really like pda or super affectionate stuff? Again, if you don't want to you don't have, I'm fine either way! (really trying hard not to sound like I'm peer pressuring you or being passive aggressive 😣) but, yeah, like if you ever have time.. thank you so much!

𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 ⟡ Javier Peña x F!Reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ⟡ 600

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⟡ Javier learns the different ways of seeing a romantic relationship, or, a drabble about Javier being with a significant other who isn't quite comfortable with his usual charms.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ⟡ Oh, my sweet anon, you don't sound passive aggressive or anything of the sort whatsoever!! If anything, I apologize for taking so long to get to this. I've been trying to urge myself back into writing a little bit more and this was a nice little challenge to help me reach that goal. I've been obsessed with Gia Margaret's album, Romantic Piano, these days and I ended up listening to Ways of Seeing on repeat while prattling down these ideas, so naturally, I've named this piece after that song. This isn't my favorite thing I've ever written? But it's been a hot second since I've been regularly writing fanfic so forgive me lmao.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ⟡ slightly established relationship, Javier crosses a physical boundary, allusions to Javi and reader having a sexual relationship but nothing explicit is described (regardless, minors, please do not interact), overall fluff and healthy communication

He wasn’t used to this. Any of it, really. Having a lady friend was a new one and by far the most surprising turn of his life at that point. But a lady friend who shrugged off his little touches like he was a pesky insect was another thing. At first he figured it was a reputation thing. Having him slung around you in the halls wouldn’t attract the good kind of attention for either of you. He could handle the jabs and jokes; he always had.

It’s why he hadn’t thought too much about it the first time he caught you in front of the copier and placed a hand on your hip. “What’s that you’re working on, querida?” he’d asked in that low, gravelly tone of his that usually drove you wild.

He swore he felt you jump; momentarily startled before you straightened your shoulders and pushed them back. He couldn’t see your expression, but he already knew he wouldn’t find an ounce of reciprocation to his teasing there anyways when you answered firmly, “Messina asked for copies of this report. She’s got a meeting in twenty minutes.”

Javier’s hand slid around your front, fingers playing at the edges of your top. “You think that’d be enough time?” he mumbled.

You swirled around on your heel and glared at him with a raised eyebrow, “For what exactly?”

“I thought that we had something going…?”

“Just because we have something going it doesn’t just give you the freedom to accost me whenever you want.”

Javier took a step back and folded his arms, getting ready to rocket into defensiveness. 

Before he could get a word in, you continued, “I know that you’re comfortable with the flirting and the teasing…but I’m not. It’s fine when it’s just the two of us.” You struggled to get an accurate grasp of your words, “But outside of that…it’s just…uncomfortable? Do you get that?”

His stomach sank as he was reminded of the type of men he’d helped put away in the past. The kind who had no regard for anyone or anything aside from their own wants. He thought of those butterflies in his chest whenever he caught your eye from across a room. How they glittered with the allusion of a secret; that secret being something special that only you and him shared. Your eyes were now shadowed with a layer of caution. How quickly those butterflies of his had turned into an invasive species.

He slowly raised his hands, admitting defeat before divulging, “I apologize. I– I didn’t mean to overstep.”

You blinked a few times before turning back around and grabbing the stack of fresh papers from the printer. “I think we should set some boundaries.”

“Boundaries? What kind of boundaries?”

“Well…for now…let’s keep the public displays of affection at a minimum. Can we do that?”

“Of course. Whatever you need. I hear you,” Javier nodded firmly.

As you started to tell him goodbye and head towards Messina’s office, one more thought popped into his mind. He reached forward to place a hand on you before stopping himself and clearing his throat instead. “Wait–”

“Yeah?”

The corner of his lip curled up into a smug smile. “Just to be clear…we’re still okay on the private displays of affection, right?”

You rolled your eyes and replied, “We’re alright in that department, Peña, don’t you worry.”

“Sounds good, keep me posted if anything changes,” he said with a quick wink before sauntering away, leaving you cradling the warm papers against your chest, knowing that you could tell him if anything did change.

[hana-no-seiiki]

Okay, it may sound weird, but what if the manager is also an artist, like daft punk/Banksy? They are famous but also anonymous, and are just working for the idol/rockstar? They got popular during their time as a manager and they cannot quit because it would be too suspicious and so sudden, like they are waiting for the right moment to quit, hut until then, the are just going to be 'the manager' in public.

YAN! POP IDOL [EVE] x MANAGER/ARTIST! READER (ft. YAN! ROCKSTAR [FEROZE])

AAAA I ACTUALLY HAD THIS IDEA BUT WAS LIKE- WHAT IF GENIE’S READERS HATE ME FOR CHANGING THE MANAGER TOO MUCH- but bAH fuck it! HAVE THIS!! THE THREESOME SMUT WILL HAVE TO WAIT-

@moyazaika tagging you just so you’re informed and can add more on Feroze’s side if you’re free:

Anyways if you manage to be both an artist and manager at the same time, props to you for your god-like time management cause that’s honestly fucken commendable. Like manager-nim you’re actually a god at this point.

I imagined reader to be completely out of the genre FerozEve (are we surprised by who the top is at this point) in order for the double trouble makers not to find out immediately.

I don’t know how wide Feroze’s music tastes are but for Eve he practically listens to every genre. As a teen his favorite were the rockstar and ofc pop. He got into Hip-Hop/Trap through the main rapper from his group, and Kpop has a ton of genres mixed into it including but not limited to EDM, R&B and Punk Rock. Soon enough, he hears of this underground DJ who’s known for not only making fire music but being their own choreographer and VJ. Talk about being blessed by the gods.

You (and his bae Khan ofc) inspired him to create his own music and eventually go solo. He went undercover sometimes to send you tracks. You thought he was just a kid/teen since his early ones were kinda . . . not it, but was impressed by the amount of passion he put into improving.

Years later, your activity died down due to working on Feroze’s career more. Those exclusive interviews and world concert arrangements don’t do themselves yknow!

Eve was saddened by your lack of releases and performances but understood. Besides he had your manager persona in mind to obsess over.

The collab happens and you joined Eve to look over the tracks in the album. From the amount of iced americanos he’d down, you could tell he was super out of it and really needed rest BUT HE WOULDN’T GODDAMN LISTEN TO YOU-

*ahem*

So you decided to help him instead.

You gave minor pointers here and there really. Nothing much in your opinion.

But to Eve he was just in utter shock and awe. How come he didn’t think of that?? The synth really elevated that section of the chorus?? Why were you hiding this genius from him??

You explained that you wanted to be a producer for the company but since it ended up reducing your passion for music so you otped for a managerial position instead.

Eve isn’t even listening at this point. He just has heart eyes. Like he didn’t know he could fall further in love with you. Boy is whipped.

Overall Eve kinda do be dumb and dense so he wouldn’t figure it out. But I’d imagine the revelation to happen sort of like this:

You were helping out Eve with vocal arrangement one day, assisting with adlibs and what not when . . .

“I think it’d be better if you put this here, and double it.”

“Woah that sounds fire.” Eve’s eyes were glued at your focused face. You looked so adorable all focused like that. He was so close to jumping out the recording booth just to give you a big ol smooch.

At his approval you continued, “We could build it up more. I’ll punch you in here and you could do a lower note? Like this.” You played a section of the song, perfectly harmonizing with his voice like it was nothing, before turning to him for approval.

He was silent. Mouth slightly agape.

“Eve?”

“. . .”

Holy shit. You’re one of his favorite artists-