#like i do not know how to express the way it hurts to finally get a narrative that prioritizes us

[woso-dreamzzz]

Video III

Meadema x Baby!Reader

Summary: You're the doctor today

"Well, look at you," Viv says with a small smile as you shuffle into the room," Doctor Meadema."

You giggle as you shuffle closer. The white lab coat you're wearing is massive and Viv wonders briefly where Beth has gotten it from. A similarly massive stethoscope hangs around your neck as you finally make your way over to the sofa.

"Doctor!" You repeat with a giggle, poking at the stethoscope before turning around to point at Beth," Mummy!"

"That's right," Viv says," That is Mummy."

You point at Viv. "Mama!"

"I am Mama. Well done and you're Munchkin!"

You nod and Viv hoists you up to sit next to her.

She's stretched out on the sofa, icing her knee from a long day of rehab and you wiggle happily next to her to get comfortable.

You press the stethoscope against her arm and she laughs.

"That's for a heartbeat, silly. Here." Viv adjusts it so it's just over her heart before helping you put the rest of it in your ears so you can listen. "That's my heart beating."

You frown and Viv moves it on top of your heart too.

"And that's your heart beating."

"Heart beating," You repeat," Heart beating!"

"Yeah, that's to show that we're alive. Because our hearts are beating."

You look a little confused briefly before breaking out into giggles when Viv tickles your tummy.

"Alright," Beth says to the door," I'm going out to walk Myle. Munchkin, you want to come?"

You look over at Beth when she speaks. Myle's by her feet, tail wagging happily. She whines a little as Beth delays putting on her harness.

Usually, you go with Mummy and Myle but today you're being a doctor and doctors don't abandon their patients. Mama is your patient today so you'll stay with her.

"With Mama," You say to Mummy who just smiles.

"You have fun with Mama," She tells you before finally securing Myle's harness," Viv, be good for the doctor!"

The front door shuts just as Mama throws a cushion at her.

You look up at Mama and Mama looks down at you. She smiles.

"Your Mummy is very silly sometimes."

Mama's right. Mummy is very silly but Mummy isn't here right now and you need to focus on Mama now.

Her knee is still hurt like it was when you first came home to them. Mummy's knee has gotten better but Mama's is being a bit mean to her.

That's why you're her doctor today in your big coat and your first aid kit.

You clamber over Mama's body to make it to where she's icing her knee.

"Careful, Munchkin," Viv says to you," My knee hurts."

"Kay," You chirp.

Mama said that the stethoscope is for listening to heartbeats but you wonder if you can also use it to listen to Mama's knee. Maybe there are mean little men in Mama's knee making it stay mean to her.

Mummy always says there's mean little men in your nose that keeps it stuffy when you're sick so you think they must be in Mama's knee too.

You press the stethoscope against Viv's bare knee and she jumps a little at the sudden contact.

"Mama," You say," Mean men in knee still mean."

"Oh, yeah?" Viv says," That's not very nice of them. Do you have any treatments, doctor?"

You think for a moment before nodding.

"Uh-huh!"

When you came in with your lab coat and stethoscope, you were also holding a little first aid kit.

Beth had bought it for you when you expressed an interest in one after hanging out with the medics at practice one day. You took it almost everywhere with you.

"Mama!" You cry out," Zip please!"

You take it everywhere with you but you're yet to learn how to actually undo a zip.

Viv smiles fondly, unzipping the little pack so you can rummage through it.

You throw the things you don't want out and Viv has to stifle her laughter, knowing that she's going to be the one picking it all up later.

"Found them!"

Your puppy plasters are your absolute favourite because you think they look like Myle and Myle's amazing. They're special and they're for your boo-boos only.

But you don't mind sharing with Mama.

You rip a handful of plasters open and clumsily place them on Mama's knee.

"What are those for, Munchkin?"

"Doctor," You correct.

Oh, sorry. What are those for, doctor?"

"Fight the mean men," You tell her.

"Well, I hope they do a good job," Viv tells you," But I'd feel better if I got cuddles too."

You hurry to flop onto Mama's chest, where you stay until Mummy and Myle come home.

"Doctor Munchkin's fixing my knee," Viv says as Beth inspects the array of puppy plasters on her knee.

"Oh, wow," Beth says," I'll have to get Doctor Munchkin to fix me up later too. Is that alright for you, doctor?"

You nod. "After Mama cuddles."

[d33pd3sire-blog]

The Air That I Breathe

Idk how to write reader fanfics without a million 'you' words so you're just gonna have to ignore that haha.

Emily Prentiss x F!Reader

Summary: You get caught following an unsub. You believe you are going to die so you make a confession to Reid.

Might make this a two or three parter, depending on if it’s what the people want haha.

TW: Fire, explosions, smoke, coughing, suffocation.

Word count: 1321

Any constructive criticism is welcomed! Be kind about it tho lol.

The team had to split up. There were two abandoned buildings in the area which suited the unsubs needs and you, Prentiss, Morgan and Reid were on your way to one of them. Hotch, Rossi, Tara and JJ were on their way to the other. As you were pulling up to the building, the unsub could be seen on the roof, a child in his arms and a gun pointed to their head. 'I wondered when id be seeing you!' He exclaimed. Prentiss unholstered her gun and pointed up at him. 'Let her go! We can sort this out without getting her involved.' Emily called, trying to find a way in. 'No. You know what, I think ill have some fun with her first.' The unsub walked away, his haunting laugh echoing through the carpark.

Morgan and Reid's SUV pulls up, both of them jumping out immediately. 'Whats going on?' Morgan looked to both of you with worry. 'The unsub has a child hostage, we need to get in there.' You respond. The anxiety in your voice does not go unnoticed, Morgan replies, 'Its gonna be okay, you call Hotch and tell him to make their way here. Ill call Penelope, see if she can find out how many exits there are on the floor plan.' You nod, pulling out your phone.

As soon as you finish filling in Hotch, Morgan comes back with a plan. 'Right guys, there are two exits. One to the left, and one to the right. Prentiss and I will take the left, you guys take the right. Remember to stick together. The others should be here soon to help.' You turn to Reid, giving him a 'we can do this' look. He returns it, unholstering his gun and turning towards the double doors. 'Come on, i'll head in first. You cover me.' You turn back to look at Emily, her dark ponytail swishing as she walks. 'Please be okay', you think. You don't know what you would do if she got hurt. Same goes for Morgan of course, but he's not the one you've been in love with since you joined the BAU. You shook your head, getting ready for what you might face and follow Reid into the building.

The both of you are silent, the only noise filling up the space is the sound of your footsteps. The corridor seems to go on forever, twisting and turning like a- BOOM. You and Reid are thrusted back, both of you knocked into a daze, confusion waving over both of you. A few seconds later your eyes open. Everything seemed to go in slow motion, as if you're not fully in your body. The ringing in your ears seems to be the only thing keeping you lucid. You slowly blink your eyes, realising Reid is standing over you mouthing something. As everything finally catches up to you, you take a sharp inhale. You can tell Reid is relieved by this by his facial expressions. A few seconds go by and the ringing starts to subside, you can finally hear Reid repeat 'you're okay, you're okay, its going to be okay.''

'What happened?' you mutter, slowly pushing yourself up onto your feet. 'An explosion. I believe the unsub set us up. He has a past with arson, we should have seen it coming.' Reid rambled, you can tell he hasn't quite come to terms with it either. 'Lets get back to the doors, can you walk?' you ask. He nods, wrapping his arm in yours incase either of you lose balance. As youre both stumbling towards the exit, you both notice smoke starting to fill the space around you. You both look at each other with fear, knowing the dangers of smoke inhalation. As you reach the doors, you both push the the handle down. Nothing. you try again. And again. And again. Your breath starting to quicken, the smoke building up, making it more and more difficult to breath. 'Reid?' You spoke. He can hear the fear in your voice, he feels it too. 'I know.'

After a few minutes of desperate attempts to open the door, you both give up. 'If we can't get out this way, lets go deeper.' Reid sputters. 'Are you insane??' The idea just spoken, had you standing in disbelief. 'Are you mad Reid?' 'No! I mean, maybe. The smoke inhalation can't be doing good things to my brain.' He jokes. 'But seriously, what if we find a window? We could smash it and get out. Here we're just sitting ducks waiting for the smoke to take over.' The idea plays in your mind for a few seconds as you turn back to the door. He's right. We can't just stand here waiting for people who may never come. Emily and Derek could be dead for all we know. Hotch and the others could take too long to get to us and we'd have suffocated. You turn to Reid and give him a reluctant nod. He takes you in his arms, guiding you to the floor. 'We have to stay low, smoke rises.' He coughs, you must admit the air is far easier to breath down here. You both slowly shuffle farther and farther down into the building.

A few minutes in and both of you are coughing regularly, neither of you mentioning the possibilities of what we could or could not find. We both start to feel the corridor get warmer and warmer as we approach a room on the right. We both stand, our hearts in our throat as we hope for a way out. As soon as we look in, our hope is crushed. Flames envelope the room, almost impossible to see anything in there. the heat and smoke hitting our faces, causing us to cough. Reid grabs your arm and we start to run past it. Maybe there's another room further down.

You both quickly approach a set of double doors, both of you holding your breath until you reach the doors. The sound of Reid pushing on the bar to open it and. Locked. Shit. 'No no no NO NO.' Reid yells, using all of his body weight to kick, punch, push the door down. A laugh starts to echo through the passage. Reid turns to look at you, out of breath. 'Whats so funny?' You then realise the laughing is coming from you. Why are you laughing? You force yourself to stop, the seriousness settling in your stomach. Shit. You both stand in silence for a moment. 'Shall we try heading back? Maybe Hotch is here now.' Reids head is in hands, he's trying to soothe himself. 'Reid.' He looks up, and nods at you. You take his hand, ready to walk back when a loud bang is heard down the hall. Followed by bright flames, both of you could feel the heat radiating from it. Tears start to flow down your face as all hope drains from you both. You both fall back onto the double doors, sitting on the floor. The idea of both of you dying now becomes a reality. We are going to die. You sigh and put your head onto your legs. 'I love her' you scoff out. 'Love who?' Reid asks. 'Emily. Always have.' Tears continue to flow. Reid pauses for a moment. 'It all makes sense now. You light up around her. I just thought.. I don't know what I thought but it makes sense.' Reid pulls you into him, both of you leaning on each other. 'Its ironic isn't it?' You say. 'Hmm?' He mumbles. 'Im gasping for air yet its Emily I want most. She's the air that I breath, I can't live without her.' You close your eyes as Reid puts his arm over you. The next few minutes you both spend thinking of those you love, while sinking deeper and deeper into darkness.

[lunargrapejuice]

thanks so much, hero

sephiroth x reader with no pronouns used | 3.3k + words

warnings: hurt/comfort, jealousy, teasing, mutual pining, reader works for shinra/soldier but i didn't specify what kind of job

it doesn’t mean anything. you know it doesn’t. and even more importantly, you try to remind yourself, it shouldn’t mean anything. at least not to you.

because what reason do you have to be upset over what wasn’t yours.. what would never be yours?

and wasn’t this your stupid, stupid, idea in the first place?

yes, it was you who brought up the idea of a fan meet and greet for the first class soldier as a means to ease the tension of the citizens during this trying time in the war with wutai and yes it was you who helped put the contest together knowing very well this could be the outcome. your foolish heart had just hoped it would end up with an angeal or genesis fan winning but the gods seemed to be enjoying watching your suffering and much to your displeasure, you were giving them a show.

you want to look away, to walk away, maybe just go home for the rest of the day, because you don’t know how much of this your heart can take but your legs and eyes betray you and keep you frozen in place, unable to take your gaze from the hands that touch sephiroth like he’s some kind of coveted item without feelings or emotions or boundaries and the fluttering eyes that are undressing him without any kind of shame.

the tablet in your arms nearly gets crushed against your chest when you hug it tightly seeing the contest winner touch the exposed skin of sephiroths chest and watching her take a step closer to him, breaking out in deep pink blush and smiling shyly up at him, only makes it worse.

is it just you or does she look even more beautiful all flushed too? maybe prettier than when she first walked through the door and became the nail to the coffin of your feelings for sephiroth. whether it was sealing it or attempting to break it, you had yet to decide and right now you don’t want to think about it, can’t think about it, even if the sparkling sharp tip is digging into your chest.

thank the goddess you can’t see his face with his back facing you. you don’t think he’s enjoying being touched by this stranger but it’s not a comfort whatsoever. a part of it is your fault. each of them had agreed to it before the contest was announced but it was your idea and there’s an unswallowable lump in your throat seeing it come to fruition now and it’s for more reasons than being a cause for his discomfort, though that certainly makes the top of the list.

or maybe he was fine with it and it’s only you with the problem here. not wanting someone to touch him in ways you wish only you could and with the gentle care one should use with something precious. not like how this woman is now, on a different level than how the research and development department handles him but it’s on par all the same. had she even asked him if he was okay with this?

is it silly to think that you could protect him in that way anyways? he is the strongest soldier, with power incomparable to any other and if he truly didn’t want her to, he could stop her without using an ounce of his strength but still..

you owe him one big apology once you can get your shit together long enough to slap on an expression that didn’t scream you hated every second of this and pretend it isn’t a punch to the gut and the heart that seems to ripple through every nerve in your body.

stupid legs, just move!

“careful now. you may burn a hole right through her skull if you stare any longer.”

genesis’ voice is what pulls your eyes away and you’re equally annoyed and grateful for that devilish smirk on his lips that says he knows way too much. at least you don’t have to look at sephiroth and this woman any longer and your body finally obeys, allowing you to walk away from this tormenting sight and back towards the first class floor.

“i’m not in the mood,” you say as you walk past genesis, ignoring how unsteady you found your voice.

“are you ever when it comes to your feelings for him?” he teases, following right on your heels.

how long had he been standing there? you wonder. goddess how long had you been standing there?

“remind me to be better about not letting my guard down around you,” there’s no real bite behind your words but right now you could do without his teasing.

“it wouldn’t matter if you did, you’re terrible at hiding your emotions,” he says it so easily, as if everyone knows it to be a fact. “but i think it is not me you need to worry about showing your true feelings too.” he pauses to push the elevator button and you think he’s quite lucky when a second later a handful of 2nd class come out of the elevator right as he adds, “unless of course you’d like him to see you being jealous.”

you take in a deep inhale, hating how right he is, ready to throw your tablet at him but instead you wordlessly step into the elevator, genesis following, and press the button for the first class floor. with a silent wish, you aim to make the rest of this ride a quiet one but it wasn’t like your friend to give in so easily.

“it’s quite cute on you, i must admit.”

you really couldn’t agree. jealousy, this.. protectiveness - possessiveness - that isn’t yours to claim over sephiroth, it felt frustrating.. ugly and heavy. “genesis-”

“you know as well as i do that it doesn’t mean anything to him,” he doesn’t bother clarifying but he doesn’t need to either.

“i don’t know how he feels.”

“clearly.”

you don’t dare read into his words and feel that lump in your throat forming once more. it keeps you quiet and thankfully for the rest of the elevator ride genesis joins you in silence.

it’s too short lived.

one step onto the first class floor and angeals eyes on you, his question restarting the relentless torture you’ve found yourself in today but you think, just slightly, you prefer this over watching the man you’re helplessly in love with be ogled over and touched by another. someone who doesn’t truly know him or cares for him.

“what’s wrong?” angeal asks.

maybe you really were terrible at hiding your emotions. you hadn’t as much as looked his way but you knew genesis wore a smile and it was only you angeal could be talking to.

“someones jealous,” genesis answers for you.

hearing it again cracks your mask, makes it hard to breathe or think or care. you just wanted today to be over and then you were never ever going to suggest something at work again lest you end up in some other kind of fucked up situation where you’re left yearning and breaking under teasing you could handle had you been a little more centered. would it have been easier if you had told sephiroth how you felt? is it worth the risk of losing him when he inevitably doesn’t feel the same? 

it’s not something you can think too deeply about right now.

“i. am. not. jealous.” every word is punctuated with a stride towards angeal. it feels like too much you could explode but you worry it would be you bursting into a fit of tears more than anything else and that’s the last thing you want. especially in front of these two. “she could stand to have some more tact,” you mumble under your breath, letting some of your emotions leak out, not able to care to hold it back or if they hear. you take the paperwork from angeals hands and turn towards genesis. “but what they do isn’t my concern.”

“what’s got you so upset then?” genesis asks.

“your slacking off,” you chide and push the paperwork into his chest, not meeting his eyes or angeals when you make your way towards the closed off office, thankful they seem to have gotten the hint you were finished with this conversation and that lazard is out for the rest of the day so you can sulk in peace. “get back to work.”

the office door shuts quietly behind you and you flip the lock as your back slides down the wood until you’re sitting on the floor, determined to not let anyone see the few tears escaping past your lashes that were hell bent on escaping no matter how much you willed them not to. you wipe them away quickly, like someone might catch you any moment but there’s no one to see. 

you don’t know how long passes while you try to work away your frustration and guilt. the locked door handle moves at some point but it doesn’t open and you don’t look up or answer. your phone dings but you don’t pull it from your pocket. it’s not until the paperwork you had started is finished that you look up to see how late it is.

hardly anyone else is around by the time you leave the shinra building and you’re making the way up the stairs towards your apartment, deciding to make the walk up the last few flights instead of taking the elevator to try to work out the last of the lingering unease so maybe you could fall into bed and just sleep this all away. it’s not likely you’ll wake up and magically not have feelings for sephiroth, it’s a bit hard to even imagine that ever happening, but at least tomorrow you would -

your thoughts, your everything, stops in their tracks the second you step onto your floor and see a familiar figure leaning casually against your apartment door with his arms folded over his chest. there was no mistaking it’s sephiroth. you’ve never met anyone who matched his height or beauty or who captivated you as much as he does and his dark clothes and silver hair only help to give him away instantly.

the next shaky step you take, his head turns and your eyes meet. your heart skips far too many beats at the smile he offers you but somehow your legs don’t give way and you draw closer to him, your worries and woes from earlier in the day falling off of your shoulders and onto the ground behind you with each step you take towards him. 

“wh-what are you doing here?” you question a bit breathlessly, blinking twice to be sure you weren’t imagining him. after each blink, every step you take, he’s still there, waiting for you.

he straightens, standing tall and taking a side step to allow you the space in front of your door. he looks down at you with mako eyes that shimmer in the dim hallway light, wearing an expression you can’t quite decipher but it’s soft, one you can’t tear your gaze from even as your cheeks warm.

he says your name and there’s no mistaking the gentle concern in his voice. “are you alright?”

it makes your chest ache and your mouth spews words that remind you of today’s uncomfortable events before you could stop them from coming out, before you could lie, tell him you’re fine with a smile that probably wouldn’t meet your eyes and would hardly convince his. “i really should be asking you that. honestly sephiroth, i owe you the biggest apology after today.i didn’t think about - i just -”

“own me an apology?” he quirks a brow at you and the confusion on his face is.. cute. boyish. you begin to feel the clouds of unease that had settled in your stomach slowly burst into butterflies. “you haven’t done anything wrong.”

“didn’t i though? if i haven’t come up with the contest idea..” you break your gaze from his, instead focusing on the patch of milky skin you had seen the woman touch earlier. your mouth feels dry, like your body is warning you to not say the words in case your jealousy also shows or he says something like he enjoyed her company and thanks you for introducing him to such a beautiful woman. you swallow it all down, hating how bitter and horrible it tastes, but push through. you know of how little others had cared for sephiroths personal space and you never wanted to be like those people, indirectly or not. this was the least you owed him. “i’m sorry if today was uncomfortable. i hadn’t considered the contest winner being so.. handsy.” goddess you wanted to cry. “fuck - sorry doesn’t even feel like it cuts it. seph, i - i -”

a touch on your arm, warm leather covering powerful fingers caressing just above your elbow, stops you in your tracks. a soft call of your name and the same gentle touch under your chin draws your attention back up towards the man that holds your very heart and doesn’t know it. 

“there’s nothing for you to apologize for.” he uses a tone you’ve heard him use with the lower class soldiers, one with an unswaying conviction, leaving no room for doubt or question but with you it’s so unbelievably tender and considerate. “you don’t need to be sorry for other people's actions. i wouldn’t have agreed to the contest if i wasn’t okay with how strange someone may act around me.” he takes a step closer to you and in the same movement your hands reach for him, holding onto his coat that lingers with the same heat as his hands and as if to assure you that it’s okay, his own touch grows a bit bolder. the fingers under your chin glide along your skin beside your mouth and up to your cheek with the weight of a feather, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear and lingering there. “the contest was a great idea. you wished to help lift the spirits of others,” he smiles then, “that’s a wonderful thing.”

“b- but, what about you?” you don’t know how you spoke the words, your chest felt so weightless and yet so full. so full of sephiroth, the scent of leather and flora and the warmness of his body.

“i’m more than alright.” he sounds so sure as he closes the last bit of the distance between you, pulling you against him in a sweet embrace that allows you to wrap your arms around his slim waist before he pulls you flush against his massive and muscular body and after a silent moment whispers against the crown of your head, his voice vulnerable and soft, tugging at your heart strings and making you pull him closer still. “thank you for thinking of my comfort. not many have before.”

“i’ll do better next time,” you mumble into his chest, another apology on the tip of your tongue but before the words come out, with his strong arm still wrapped around you, sephiroth squeezes you lightly.

“you’ve already done so much. more than anyone.”

he lets go of you all too quickly, as if it was urgent that he do so and it leaves you in a dizzying spell that you want to melt into and chase after. as you blink and he clears his throat, it starts to clear, you find your bearings and can barely hear his next words over the sound of your thundering heart, asking again if you are okay.

“yeah, i’m okay,” and you mean it despite the earlier whirlwind of your emotions. but he has always had this effect on you, everything felt okay when he was around and when he held you it was like nothing else mattered.

sephiroth lets out an audible sigh of relief, like he had truly been worried you weren’t. “good, i’m glad.”

before you can stop your lips from moving, you ask what’s on the front of your mind out loud, much to your horror. “genesis didn’t say something did he?”

that adorably quizzically look tugs at his features once more. “should he have?”

“no, not at all!” you try to brush it off quickly, even if he had would you really want to hear more about how jealous you came off earlier? what would sephiroth think if he knew..? you can’t think about it right now when he’s standing right in front of you with your face burning and you can’t meet his eyes. “i was just - don’t mind me.” 

“as long as you’re okay.”

“i am,” you assure him with a sweet, genuine smile. how could you not be okay with him here with you, checking on you, smiling back at you? the jealousy you felt feels a bit foolish now. genesis was right, it didn’t mean anything but this.. this felt like it meant something, even if it was just to you. “thanks for checking on me.”

“i’ll let you get inside then.���

“okay..” you didn’t want him to go but hold back your wishes for him to stay. “get home safe seph.”

“sleep well.”

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

it took nearly all of sephiroths strength to pull away from your embrace and somehow even more strength to refrain from running up the stairs back to your 20th floor apartment after he had made it outside of the building and took the first few steps back towards sector 0 and the soldier barracks. 

somehow so much and not enough.. he wanted to be greedy, to hold you forever, call you his, accept your loving nature even if he was far from a man who deserved it. but tonight this would have to be enough, the searing of his skin everywhere you had touched him, the remembrance of how small and delicate you felt in his arms and the near painful longing to do it again alongside the overwhelming feeling of being cared for by you.

he’s no stranger to your kindness and thoughtfulness but it’s so foreign to him all the same. 

the touch of others is all too familiar to him, and in worse ways than that of the winner of the contest today. it was something he learned to ignore, tune out, numb, but your touch was like being branded by the stars and cradled by the curve of the moon. every accidental swipe of your hands sending electricity through his entire body and the few times he had been bold enough to hold you left him basking in your warmth and gentleness and utterly aching when it was torn from him.

sephiroth feels it all over and over again on his walk back to the barracks and it snaps more of the strings on the leash of his feelings for you. it is getting so hard to hold back and today when it felt like you had been so far away, avoiding him, upset with him somehow, he could hardly stand it. 

his worries are at least quelled for now and after your interaction he’s left with more emotions than he knows what to do with besides let them fill his chest and wrap around his heart. he can feel the heat of his cheeks lingering all the way through the shinra lobby and into the elevator.

should he tell you how he feels? could he handle the consequences of losing the only comfort in his life if you couldn’t return his feelings? could you love a man like him, someone who didn’t think they were even capable or deserving of this kind of love but wants to try for you, to give you everything and more.. for he would give you everything, even himself if you asked.

unusual for this late hour, the elevator stops on one of the soldier floors, stopping his thoughts and when sephiroth looks up, he sees a tired genesis step inside.

“late night?” he asks, a teasing lilt to his tone.

with a roll of his eyes, genesis replies, “it’s all thanks to you, hero.”

the first question sephiroth asks is if this is about you.

genesis only groans, “goddess help you both.”

main masterlist

[tomssexdoll]

hey boobie toobie

so, you and bill are in an argument. a nasty one. in a hotel of all places. he’s been texting you he’d return to the hotel early all week but getting there at 3am which obviously raises suspicion. you accuse him that he might be cheating or doing something dangerous. after a few insults are thrown from both ends, he mentions your eating disorder. a sensitive place you both swore to never mention. “well at least i can fucking eat,” you felt your heart break. there was a moment of silence as you registered what he said. “fuck- liebe im sorry” he tried apologizing, but you didn’t wanna hear it. “no, get the **fuck** away from me, bill-“ you snapped. you slapped his hands as they tried to comfort you. you grabbed your things and stormed out of the hotel room. you had nowhere to go. all of your friends were hours away since you followed bill on tour. your first thought was gustav, he was so sweet and could definitely cheer you up. he was your closest friend in the band. it would usually be bill, but for obvious reasons not today. you stumbled to gustav’s hotel room and knocked gently but eagerly. he swung open the door, confused expression. “c-can i come in?” as gustav lets you in, you start rambling about what happened. you even began to cry. gustav succeeds in calming you down and eventually bill knocks on the door. gustav answers and sees you on his bed looking a mess. “y/n!” he exclaims and pushed past gustav to get to you. “i don’t wanna see you,” you mumble. “schatz, please? i’ll make it up to you” he pleads. you finally agree and bill leads you out of the hotel and into your favorite nearby restaurant where at your table, he apologizes about everything and you forgive him :)

omg yes ily

How could you?

PAIRINGS: Bill 2010 x Female reader

CONTENT: SMUT

SYPNOSIS: Bill and Y/N get in a heated argument after he yet again returns home late, he mentions something they both agreed they'd never bring up ever, going to Gustav for comfort.

A/N: hi

WARNINGS: yelling, arguing, mentions of eating disorder

Bill has been acting weird lately. We were on a tour for his band and stayed at a hotel in Paris. He'd been texting me all week that he'd be home early but would always manage to come around 3am, rough looking.

It really hurt me seeing him do this, he never really acted like this in the past so I never understood what provoked it. Was he cheating? Or worse, doing something illegal or dangerous? It was a foreign country and he could get killed.

Every night my heart filled with worry, tears falling down my cheeks at the minutes going by where he still wasn't home. Tonight he came home late again, the clock read 3:04am. He bursted in, chucking himself on the bed in hopes to go to bed and prevent my yelling. But I had enough of his bullshit.

"Don't try and sleep your way out of this, get the fuck up," I raised my voice, "where have you been all night? You texted me 5 hours ago and said you'd be home" I sighed.

He just rolled his eyes, slowly getting up, "I don't want to hear it y/n, I'm fucking tired" he groaned deeply, walking towards me. "I don't care if you're tired, clearly you're not tired enough to go out every night and do god knows what" I spat, crossing my arms.

"Oh shut up, you're always worrying about stupid things" "stupid things? For all I know you could be cheating, is that what you're doing? Because if you are it's not very discreet" I glared at him, testing his patience.

"Oh my god, of course I'm not cheating" he grunted, looking down at me intensely, his eyes piercing through mine. "Then what are you doing? Doing illegal things? Drugs? Stealing things? Hm?" I spoke to him like I was his mother, lecturing him on his whereabouts.

"No! For fuck sakes you're so controlling! Always telling me what to do, you're psycho!" he raised his voice, grabbing my arm. I slapped his hand away as soon as it got into contact with my skin, "how dare you? You fucking pig!" I yelled.

Great, we were arguing once again. In a fucking hotel of all places.

He got visibly more angry, his eyes narrowing at me "don't fucking call me that, you're a fucking bitch" he growled, "always complaining, bitching and moaning, I should've just left you at home for fuck sakes" rubbing his temples in frustation.

"Oh great, thanks, that makes me feel wonderful," I rolled my eyes, turning away from him and sitting down onto the bed. "Now you're the one walking away, I thought we were going to talk about it schatz?" he taunted, "oh don't even Bill, you're so fucking selfish," I scoffed.

"Selfish? Yet I'm the one who provides you with fucking everything, I spoil you all the time with gifts," a scowl appearing on his face. "It's not about the money Bill, it's about quality time and love, it seems you can't even do that properly," I sighed.

"Can't do it properly?" he chuckled, "let's talk about what you can't do properly, at least I can fucking eat properly, can you say the same?" he spat out, his words bitter and cruel.

My heart just broke at his words, my mouth slightly agape. He knew that I struggled with an eating disorder, a place we both swore never to mention.

There was an awkward silence before what he said registered in his head, his expression going from anger to guilt, his eyes softening. "Oh fuck...liebe I'm so so sorry," he rushed towards me, trying to apologise but it went through one ear and out the other.

His hands came towards to waist, trying to pull me close and get away with such a horrible comment. "No! Get the fuck away from me Bill," I snapped, slapping his hands away from me. I got up and started to pack my things, ignoring his cries for me.

I stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind me, trying to figure out where I should go. I wasn't close enough with Tom or Georg..my friends were hours away. Then I realized Gustav would welcome me with open arms, I rushed over to his room and knocked gently on the door, urgent to go in so Bill wouldn't drag me back to our room.

After a moment he swung the door open, confused to see me standing there with my things, "what's wrong Y/N?" he frowned, glancing from my face to my bags.

"C-can I come in.." I bit my lip, trying to stop tears from pouring out of my eyes, voice slightly shaky. He nodded quickly and let me in, closing the door softly behind me and leading me to his bed.

"So what happened, was it Bill?" he sighed, running his thumb over my hand, a friendly gesture he'd usually do if I was upset. I nodded, "he..he brought up my eating disorder in a fight.." I burst into tears, Gustav immediately wrapping his arms around me, "I'm sorry y/n..that's such a shitty thing for him to do.." he sighed, comforting me.

I nodded and kept rambling about everything he was doing, staying out late and not telling me, lying and telling me how he would be home early. Gustav just listened to me, giving little comments here and there, rubbing my back soothingly.

I eventually calmed down, Gustavs calming voice making me feel better. He let go of me, running his thumb over my hand again, "I'm always here if you need someone to talk to, I know how mean he can get when he's tired" he smiled softly, I nodded and thanked him, he was an angel.

We kept on talking, discussing what I should do when I heard a soft knock, Gustav thought it might of been Georg or Tom or even room service so he got up, slowly approaching the door and opening it, Bills tall figure appearing in the doorway.

Bills eyes light up when he sees me, sitting on Gustavs bed, looking like a complete mess, my mascara smudged on my cheeks. He pushed past Gustav, running to me. I didn't even look up at him, not bearing to see his face after the words he said to me, "I don't want to see you.." I mumbled, he sighed deeply "schatz, please? I'll make it up to you," he pleads, leaning down to my level and holding my hands.

I turned to look at him, I sighed and agreed. I knew it was stupid but the look in his eyes just made me cave in, the way he could so easily woo me was dangerous.

"Thanks Gustav.." I smiled and hugged him, waving goodbye as we walked out of his room. Bill didn't speak, just held my hand and lead me downstairs into the lobby, walking out of the hotel and onto the streets.

Eventually we stood outside of my favourite resturant, Bill had called in a favour and they quickly opened at such a late hour, preparing for us. I smiled softly, trying to hide it from him.

"Cmon honey, let's go inside" he kissed my cheek softly, walking inside with me and sitting at our booth, a beautiful view of the city right next to us.

"I'm so sorry for what I said y/n..you know I didn't mean it, it was just the first thing that came to my head and I hadn't even fully processed it, I love you so much" he frowned, reaching over the table and taking my hands in his.

I sighed, "I know baby, I know you didn't mean for it to hurt me but..it really did" he nodded sympathetically, letting me vent my frustations out. "I still love you though, I'm willing to forgive you but if you bring it up again it won't be so easy to trust you again" I sighed, "I promise I won't bring it up, ever again" I smiled and brought his hands to my lips, kissing them softly.

"What were you even doing out so late?" I giggled, "honestly..I was literally just out at bars to destress from the concerts, sometimes I just went on walks that lasted hours, I'm sorry for lying and not telling you where I was, you're not controlling at all you just love and worry about me.." he sighed, embarrassed by his shitty actions.

"It's fine baby..you can just come to me for comfort, you know I'm always here" he nodded, grateful for the suggestion, "thanks baby, I love you so much, I'm so glad I have such a wonderful girl in my life, I don't know what I'd do without you.." he leaned across the table, kissing my lips softly.

tags: @itsmealaiah @itsangelll @kaulitzsbabyy @ballhair @estxkios @bkaulitzlover @charliesgoodboy @tomsonlyslut @ge-billsgf

[tenderhungering]

𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐑𝐎𝐘 𝐗 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐄𝐔𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐋! 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 — PLANNING PHASE + PREVIEW

(a/n) this is my first ever public writing piece! i’m very excited to share it but i must warn you that it’s a VERY rough around the edges. i’d probably call this a preview as to what i’d like to write as a full fanfic? a small scene from it. i will say i write in an odd style so i heavily apologize for the way i worded things! i wanted to test the waters and see if it’s anything worth continuing i think it could be very fun ! let me know your thoughts. :o)

i like to be transparent in the planning phases of things so i can get a feel of what you guys would like to see more of? you are ALL my beta readers now,,,

i’m thinking of the reader being some sort of journalist? i’m not entirely sure. i love the theme of exploitation and trauma so who better than someone who’s life work is writing about everyone else’s. jack definitely would call them exploitative, cruel, two-faced etc. mirrors of one another. there is something wrong with you. there is something wrong with you that is also wrong with me.

How often must you repent to feel the sin go away? Does that ever stop? Or does it always feel like your skin heating up underneath your clothes in shame — have you always lived in shame? The plush couch enveloped you both in a way you thought it would swallow you whole. After what you’d said, you thought it should have. For the feeling to go away, that is. Jack hasn’t said anything since you two had arrived from the chat at the diner. You couldn’t blame him.

In this light however, you let your eyes linger at the way he’d stare down at the floor, lost in his own thoughts. You never noticed it until now, but Jack had this perpetually sorrow expression. Every time he spoke to you — no looked at you, it felt like your very existence was enough to make his heart tender. Not in the way you’d like. Tender like a bruise. The wanton feeling hadn’t gone away for some time now, fingers clasped together in your lap. You turned your head away from his direction. Maybe it the feeling wasn’t meant to go away. Maybe you’d always been like this and he’d make you notice.

And sometimes you really hated him for it.

“Do you remember when we first met each other?” He spoke softly, still not lifting his head up to look at you. Like the very idea of it hurt him.

A hum from your end of the couch. You had interviewed him for an article when you had first met. A fluff piece. Nothing major. Something to make him appealing to the audience.

“And you were wearing that blazer.” he continued, head tilting to the side, threatening to look at you. But not quite there. It was never quite there with Jack. “And you asked why I got into television.”

“I remember.” Spoken like you were talking to a wounded animal. It had been a while since you’d use that voice. Since you’ve been spoken to like this.

“And I had said to you that it was because I was starving for something more.” The last word hung in the air. Tired. Worn out. “You asked what that more was?”

He hadn’t answered last time you’d asked. Only grinned like you’d somehow managed to figure something out deep inside of him.

Now couldn’t stay in one room together without it being with a sort of intensity that demanded you touch whichever way you could. Neither of you moved. Even when he finally locked eyes with you, defeated. Like you’d won. It did not feel like a victory.

“I want to be comforted.”

This admission of feeling small, constrained, pent up and touch starved. This glimpse at what made Jack up. Of grief and pain presented in the form of a man bare, yet fully clothed with clothes you can’t help but think weighed him down. Tie like a leash to some cruel owner that doesn’t allow him to stray further than a few feet away. Sitting in this silence, something had made the final pieces of thread that have acted like a barrier between the two of you unravel. You don’t respond, eyes staring, like a spectator to some act of holiness. Except this is like watching a saint bleed the same as you.

“Comfort me.”

It was said in such a way it feels like he’d been holding in air since he had met you. Or rather like he’s been hollow and something had placed itself in that space. Desperate. Longing. Almost pitiful enough to make you want to stop him from embarrassing himself from the way he pleaded such a thing. You don’t get a chance to. The phrase is repeated. Again and again. Like some sort of prayer.

He slowly lurches forward, crawling the way you’d imagine felt like a punishment. A repentance. For a second, you thought you might reach forward, prevent him from reaching you. Head placed on your lap like a dog.

“Please comfort me.”

[fahbee]

No Nightingales

We, the audience, know what that means. But how do Crowley and Aziraphale know?

Crowley makes it a point to deliver this line in the most 'pay attention, this is important' way possible. "Listen. Do you hear that?" Dramatic pause. And after Aziraphale says he doesn't hear anything, Crowley continues, "That's the point. No Nightingales." Followed by, “You idiot. We could have been… us.”

Let’s talk about it.

This is the first time in the show that nightingales are explicitly, openly referred to between Aziraphale and Crowley. Prior to this moment we had God's narration and the song playing on the piano during their romantic celebratory lunch at the Ritz. But no one in-universe has mentioned the song, or alluded to its importance or its meaning to Aziraphale and Crowley.

But during this painful 'breakup' scene, not only does Crowley refer to nightingales, but he does so in a way that is makes it clear that "nightingales" is actually a code between them meaning “us”.

After Crowley says “no nightingales” Aziraphale looks hurt, almost offended. Then Crowley says "we could have been... us" (past tense) and Aziraphale's heart breaks. He quickly looks away because he knows he isn't capable of hiding this pain. We briefly see this about-to-cry expression when Crowley grabs him for the kiss. In other words, Crowley saying "no nightingales" is understood by both of them to mean "our romance, our 'us', has ended before it even truly began."

Think about what this must mean for the rest of their 1941 interaction that we have yet to see. "A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square" was published in 1940. I think it’s clear that the first time they heard that song together, they had a breakthrough in their relationship. It might have been a baby step - but it was a significant one. Something happened between them to make "nightingales" code for "us" and it makes perfect sense for that breakthrough to have happened during their romantic 1941 encounter.

But I don't think it was anything as dramatic or earth-shattering as a kiss or a confession. I think it's clear that the bookshop kiss at the end of s2 was their first kiss, and Crowley's "we've spent our existence pretending that we aren't" speech is the first time either one of them as put their feelings for each other in such plain language. Nina's "have you been together long" talk with Crowley, and his subsequent shell-shocked reaction to it, points to Crowley not even really being fully aware that what Aziraphale and Crowley feel for each other looks like romantic love to outsiders because it actually is romantic love.

So what the hell happened in 1941? I am confident that we're going to find out in s3. My guess is that they continued drinking into the night, at some point one of them turned on the radio, and then the song came on. My hope is that Crowley asks Aziraphale to dance, which Aziraphale promptly and nervously turns down (call back to the s2 line "You don't dance.") but this leads them into a discussion about their importance to one another, even if they can't actually demonstrate it explicitly - no dancing, no touching, etc. Then finally, at the end, one of them plainly ties "nightingales" to their relationship in the most achingly romantic way possible. "You'll always have me, until the world ends, until the nightingale stops singing." I'm no writer, but you see what I mean.

I also think "no nightingales" means that when Aziraphale and Crowley finally do reunite and explicitly become an "us" (complete with do-over kiss) we'll get a line of dialogue referencing the nightingale once again.

[t3ag3rs]

g e n s o - 1 3.

you groan feeling a sudden pressure hit your head as you wake up slowly in the infirmary.

fluttering your eyes you look around to see bakugou asleep in the chair by your side.

"what..?" you groan feeling disoriented, looking down you see your leg in a cast. "oh cmon...." you whine, waking up bakugou.

"goddamn your loud..." he mutters as he stretches, "took you long enough to wake up.."

"what happened? why am i here?" you ask signaling to your body and around you.

"okay so... you made it to the finals in the 1v1's... fought against me and thats why you're here.." he pauses, "but- you did get third out of everyone"

"really bakugou." you reply with a deadpan expression, "you really had to put me back in a cast after i had just gotten out of one?"

"its not like i was trying to genso!" he shouts, "would you rather me go easy on you and show everyone that you still cant beat me, or fight you like i would with everyone else to show that you are strong?" he asks with a scowl.

you widen your eyes as you realize his reason, "oh..." you look down, "thanks then.. i guess.." you mutter before looking up at him, "okay but seriously though howd i end up in here?? every time i get injured i somehow end up in here but i have no idea how..."

he clears his throat, "thats not important... but now since your up ill be heading out.. damn shitty hair forced me to stay here until you woke up.." he mutters standing up.

"oh.." you sigh slightly looking down. why do i feel kind of disappointed that hes leaving...?

he stops right before he exits, "for what its worth.. i think a lot of pros were impressed by our fight. you did well genso." he states before opening the door.

"thanks.." you mumble with a slight blush covering your cheeks.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

you limp into class slowly the next day.

as soon as you open the door, your crushed by mina, "oh my gosh! are you okay?? are you feeling better?? i was so worried y/n!" she rambles pulling away and checking over your body.

"chill out mina... at this rate shes gonna get hurt from you.." chuckles kirishima walking up to you with a soft smile, "how you feeling?"

"way better.." you chuckle, "okay but seriously though.. who took me to the infirmary?? because whenever i get hurt i always end up there, but i dont know how..."

"okay babe.. get ready cause its quite shocking..." giggles mina, "its yours truly... mr. bakugou katsuki over there..." she whispers while jabbing her thumb in his direction.

you let out a laugh, "hah! thats a good one..! but no really.. who is it..?" you sigh as your laughter dies down.

"we're being serious.." repeats kirishima with a slight grin.

you widen your eyes, "no fucking way..." you look at mina, "but he hates me..!"

"well he must hate you soooo much that whenever you get injured during class he just has to pick you up and rush you to the infirmary..!" she says sarcastically.

"yeah.. he did that during entrace exams too! i honestly thought you two were a thing.. kinda like an old couple yknow?" kirishima quips in with a grin.

"yeah exactly!" mina agrees, bouncing on her heels. "im sure everyone in class thinks it too from the way you two act around each other..! theres just- so much tension!" she squeals.

you clasp your hand over her mouth, "shush..!" you blush, pulling her away from bakugous hearing range. "you two are so loud..!"

"is someone getting flusteredddd...?" teases kirishima with a dopey grin.

"kiri!" you gasp, "youre supposed to be on my side here..!" you grunt slapping his arm lightly.

"no way..! do you like him..?" she asks with a slight whisper. "cmon tell ussss..!" she repeats, poking your shoulder.

you blush heavily, "n-no..! i mean- i dont think so..! ughhh.. i dont know- im not sure..!" you respond frustrated.

"yknow what i just heard?" says mina with a grin, "i like him i just dont wanna accept it!!" she answers with enthusiasm.

right as you start to open your mouth mr. aizawa walks in. "this conversation isnt over..!" you whisper before sitting down in your seat.

"listen up everyone" sighs aizawa, "the hero offers for each one of you have came in..." he says before turning on the projector and presenting the results.

you widen your eyes as you find your name with 3632 offers, "geez... thats a lot.."

"now since you all have made a name for yourselves today you all will be figuring out your hero names." states aizawa, "to help with that midnight will be monitoring over you all" he says welcoming midnight to the front before walking out.

you look at the slate on your table. cmon... whats a hero name i can use..? you think groaning slightly.

"can you stop whining genso?! i cant concentrate!" barks bakugou as he hits you in the head with his slate.

huh. maybe genso isnt a bad hero name... you let out a small smile before quickly scribbling it on your board and raising your hand, "im ready..!"

midnight smiles beckoning you to the front, "okay.. im gonna be known as the elemental hero: genso" you state with a small smile.

"traditional japanese! i love it!" claps midnight with a happy smile on her face.

"HEY I MADE THAT NAME UP GENSO! YOU CANT JUST USE THAT AS YOUR HERO NAME-" yells bakugou as he shoots up.

"well then... i guess i can thank you for your brilliant nicknames" you grin playfully, sitting down.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

you stare at the paper of offers with your eyebrows furrowed. which offer do i choose...? theres so many..!

soon the bell rings causing you to stand up and place the papers in your backpack. slinging it over your shoulder you head your way out.

"genso..!" calls a voice from behind you, "wait up."

you turn and see bakugou glaring at you, "what is it?" you ask slightly intrigued.

"where are you gonna go for your offer..?" he asks gruffly looking to the side.

"uhh.. im not sure yet. why..?" you ask slightly confused to why he wanted to know.

"you should go for endeavor... one of your weakest elements is fire no..?" he says walking beside you.

you nod a bit, "huh.. your right, maybe i might go for him then. what about you?"

"im going for best jeanist. he is the no. 4 hero for a reason so i might as well see what hes all about.." he mutters.

"really?" you ask incredulously, "i would never see you going for him to be honest... hes so reserved and well.. your so- not reserved..?" you say trying to sound as nice as possible about your true opinion.

"you calling me a mess genso?" he snarls, glaring at you.

"no..! not at all..!" you chuckle sheepishly. "okay well maybe i was..." you admit scratching your neck. he chortles slightly, causing you to widen your eyes in shock. "no way you just laughed..."

he suddenly snaps back to his original self, "the fuck you say..?" he says setting off mini sparks in his palm.

"well.. it was nice seeing you bakugou but ill be off- bye....!" you exclaim, quickly running away.

bakugou stared at you running off, chuckling to himself lightly.

what is this feeling...?

previous parts: pt. 0 0 / pt. 0 1 / pt. 02 / pt. 03 / pt. 04 / pt. 05 / pt. 06 / pt. 07 / pt. 08 / pt. 09 / pt. 10 / pt. 11 / pt. 12 next part: your all caught up for now!

☆taglist! @katszumi @coolgirl458 @niktwazny303 @crumbycrumb3

[atopvisenyashill]

i have this theory that if more of her children had lived (especially gael), alysanne would have expressed anger at baelon for going along with stealing rhaenys' inheritance.

but at this point she literally only had baelon, so she decided to swallow her pride and support him.

what do you think?

Well we actually don't know if Alysanne expressed anger at Baelon over this; the narrative is largley silent on Baelon's reaction to being named Prince of Dragonstone and completely silent on how Alysanne treats Baelon, Viserys, and Daemon afterwards. Also, Gael dies several years after Baelon was named; in fact, Gael dies two years after Rhaenyra is born, so Viserys and Baelon are already well entrenched in the capital. Alysanne is also not shy about expressing her anger at her husband in this time period and it seems implied she doesn't really express any affection for Viserys during or even after the second quarrel; there's no mention as to whether she returns from dragonstone for the wedding, whether she's there for rhaenyra's birth, whether she had a hand in viserys or aemma's match even - and we still don't know if daemon's match with rhea royce is the result of alysanne, baelon, or jaehaerys either. beyond that, alysanne is actively campaigning for rhaenys at several points so i don't think it's out of the realm of possibility to say she is pissed off at baelon - it's just that none of the biographers give a shit about that aspect of her life, because that complicates her from the perfect mother, perfect queen, who uses soft power, to a woman who is deeply hurt and betrayed by the two men she is shown to be closest by, and that it completely ruins the twilight years of her life.

with daella, alyssa, and viserra all long dead, aemon recently dead, and long barred from seeing saera, yeah, all alysanne has left is baelon and gael, along with maegelle and vaegon, but i do think that's part of the problem; both times, i get the sense that maegelle is like,,,,basically gaslighting her mother into going back to jaehaerys, and maegelle is the only person alysanne really has left talk to, with gael being kind of an eternal child and baelon being part of the reason she's so upset. so i actually kind of disagree here - i think alysanne likely did voice anger at baelon, and baelon, alongside maegelle, basically told her to just get the hell over it, and it took several years of alysanne slowly getting more sick, slowly losing more of her memory, losing her physical connection to her dragon, and probably rewriting her own memories of her relationship with jaehaerys before she finally was broken down enough by the ungrateful brats she had left to "forgive" jaehaerys and come back home, but even then, it seems unlikely she and jaehaerys were at all close past this point, and we get very little mention of alysanne being close to baelon again. i think towards the end of her life, alysanne really was just not in contact with much of her family besides gael, rhaenys, and maegelle, and she's being like, actively manipulated in some heinously elder abusey ways by maegelle on top of being an older mother.

[chevelleneech]

Gonna be the first (maybe) to say it, but if nothing comes of Buddie at all by the s7 finale, I am going to have a hard time believing any future storyline set up the show does.

To be clear, I do not think Buddie has to be canon for it finally be addressed, because I acknowledge what happened in seasons 2-6 kind of exist in a different world. It was a different network and majority of it was written with the *potential intent to have Buck be queer only to have that shot down, whereas now on their new network, Buck is canonically bi. So I am aware that the powers that be have changed, and with that, what the writers are able to do will differ.

However, I still think something should be said or done to tie those loose ends up. I still think Buddie is an unanswered entity in the 911 universe, and not putting it to rest is sour writing. Because if Tim didn’t want to touch on it, he would have said as much with 7x04. He would have crafted an episode that was definitively abut Buck wanting to be around Tommy, instead of it being ambiguous and coming across as him being jealous of Eddie choosing someone else.

And I know people who ship Buck and Tommy will say Buck said in the episode he was trying to get Tommy’s attention, but it is established in that very same moment Buck is only “guessing” Tommy is who he wanted attention from. He does not state it affirmatively, and in fact only says he guesses, after Tommy asks for clarification, because he too was surprised Buck’s actions were for him.

Now, this is not me saying Tim and the writers weren’t still intentionally aiming for Tommy, but if so, what they wrote does not make sense. So unless we’re meant to take that episode as being poorly written/constructed… I need them to go ahead and clarify things. Because how I would have crafted the episode if I knew I was aiming for Tommy not Eddie, is by:

Having a scene where Buck calls Tommy for the tour. — That establishes Buck seeking Tommy out on screen, and doesn’t leave viewers wondering how it happened.

Had Buck and Tommy run into each other so Buck could 1) ask him how the fight went, 2) have Tommy invite Buck to the basketball game, with him saying yes. — 1) would be giving them another chance to talk without Eddie, but for Tommy to sort of “gush” about how cool Eddie is and etc, solidifying the foundation of Buck’s jealousy out of fear he was being replaced. 2) would eliminate the need for Buck to peacock for Eddie in the gym, and could instead be replaced with him bragging that Tommy invited him along too, while Eddie is confused as to why Buck is excited since he doesn’t like basketball.

Shown Eddie and Tommy after the basketball game, in which Eddie expresses concern over Buck acting weird and hurting him. — It would have allowed viewers a chance to see Tommy connect the dots, then decide to go talk to Buck.

Lastly, I would have scrapped Tommy’s confusion entirely, replacing it with: “Trying to get your attention has been kind of exhausting.” — “Is that why you maimed your best friend?” — “I guess so.” — “Hmm, that’s not really my thing. I prefer talking.” “Yeah, my sister says there are better ways to get someone atten— *kiss happens*

So then, not only would that be blatant and intentional flirting from Tommy, but we’d also have known he had an idea about why Buck was acting out, and the kiss would have been less of a shock-shock (not that it truly was) for the audience and more us realizing Tommy sussed Buck out and took a chance on kissing him.

And that’s that. That is how the episode could have been definitively about Buck wanting Tommy’s attention, without changing anything major. Mind you, I’m not a showrunner nor professional writer, so I’m not going to act as if I know better than Tim.

What I will say, is I’m also not stupid and don’t see why they’d toe the line if they did not want people thinking Buck might be jealous and wanting of Eddie’s attention. Because there are only two answers, really. The first being, Tim didn’t know what the outcome would be the entire time he was writing it and couldn’t commit until he had an answer from Lou/ABC about the kiss. Or the other, Tim is actively teasing Buddie with no plans to make them canon. The latter would be fucked up, but not uncommon for television.

Either way, I said what I said. If all of this Buddie talk and intentional teasing within this season alone does not result in Buck and Eddie having a conversation about how they feel for each other, even if they do not date, there is no reason for me to believe any other storylines are being written with intent. Because there’s also only two ways this can go. Buddie is acknowledged and is shut down (a fair choice if that’s not the story Tim wants to tell) or Tim can act like he never dropped hints and that Buddie shippers were sadly looking to close despite what was said in 7x04, again, even though the episode plays both sides.

If he chooses the latter, that means he simply has lost his ability to craft interesting stories. And while I’ll still watch the show, because I genuinely love every character, it won’t matter to me what is being built up, because he could just as easily decide I as a viewer was looking too hard and only have myself to blame for misunderstanding what was written. That’s not a fun way to enjoy a show. Feeling like nothing matters when it feels like it should, just because the writers and show runner want to be chaotic or “subvert expectations”.

It’s why The Magicians went downhill fast after Quentin died. All that build up between he and Eliot for 3 seasons, followed by a 4th season of Quentin letting himself be tormented in attempt to save Eliot from being trapped inside the mind of a monstrous, magical killing machine, just to kill Q off before Eliot returned. Before either of them got to reconcile their love for each other and experience any sort of happiness together going forward.

I’m not saying 911 would ever be so dramatic, but am using it as an example of how to piss your audience off (not that Buddie shippers make up the majority of the audience) for no reason. It’s a great example of how crafting a story just to end it abruptly, then claim it as some profound and deep choice viewers just don’t understand about storytelling, is weak. It’ll be a poor excuse, and lead to me, at least, deciding to not actively care about how any storyline is crafted. I’m sure the show will continue to entertain me, again, I do love it, but the story building of each season won’t be my concern. I’ll watch whatever they show and take it as is, no expectations or theories, because what would be the point?

..

The (*) is because it is unclear to me whether or not any of this plan was actually written and shown on air, so people who say s4 was definitely leading to Buddie happening… I must disagree. Unless something else was said to confirm such, I can only go off of how I know episodes are usually pitched. Which is during meetings and stuff, either before or as they’re written. So Tim (or whoever) might have pitched the idea to FOX to have Buck be queer in s4, but that doesn’t mean they ended up airing the build up at all. What we’ve seen from s4 could very well be the consultation prize of sorts. Giving Buddie bigger emotional moments since Buck being queer was already shut down. That doesn’t mean Eddie was also planned to be queer back then or that Buddie was going to happen. Buck could have easily been dealing with unrequited feelings.

[sttoru]

‘no matter how much time the king of curses spends with you, he doesn’t think he will ever understand you or your affectionate behaviour towards him.’

☀︎｜tags. true form sukuna x female reader. heian era sukuna. fluff. bits of mentions of blood & murder. big size difference. cold-big-monster-having-a-small-soft-spot-for-a-single-human trope. reader gets called ‘little one, brat’. not proof read! let me know if you like my characterisation or not; it’s my first sukuna fic.

a kiss on the cheek is one of the most innocent - yet apparently also the most difficult - things to do. it’s a small form of intimacy; not that hard to do. it’s really as simple as planting your lips on your beloved’s cheek. then all you do is retreat — maybe get a kiss on the cheek back from him. or on the lips.

“get moving. i’m not waiting all day for you.” sukuna grumbles. you had suddenly stopped in your tracks and the king of curses was confused as to what the reason might have been. the two of you had been walking through the courtyard for a few minutes now — well, you basically had to drag him out to take a little stroll together.

and now the same you was quiet. it bothered sukuna; you were always so chatty around him when it was just the two of you. he might have called you an ‘annoying brat’ for it, but he secretly enjoyed your company and voice.

“c-coming.” you reply in a quiet mumble, eyes glancing over at the monstrous frame that stood a few steps away. his dull yet sharp gaze was focused on you — like he was sizing you up. or rather: trying to figure out what’s wrong with the change in behaviour you showed.

sukuna watches you as you hurry over to his side again. he resumes walking, hands folded over each other under the material of his kimono.

though, he couldn’t yet let go of the fact that you were acting different around him. the king of curses’ suspicion only grew once he noticed how your fingers fiddled with your obi. you were anxious about something.

sukuna shakes his head slightly. some humans sure are difficult to understand, he thinks to himself. your happy yet reserved personality when you usually interacted with him had disappeared and made place for a nervous wreck. trying to figure out why made sukuna’s head hurt.

were you finally scared of him? like all other humans and curses were?

he doesn’t know why, but it felt like he would hate for such thing to happen. sukuna usually wouldn’t care if someone resents, fears or somehow even admires him. only you could make him think and care about such difficult and maybe even trivial things.

“uhm,” you break off his train of thoughts and his eyes are instantly on yours again, “may i do something really quickly?”

sukuna’s face doesn’t show any change in expression, but a small nod tells you everything you need to know. you clear your throat, “can you please lower your head towards me?”

lowering his head? oh, you got some guts. if anyone else had said that to him, sukuna would have obliterated them; there wouldn’t have been anything but red bloody dust left of their body.

but then again: it’s you. all exceptions the king of curses makes are for you.

sukuna slightly lowers his head to your level so you could do whatever you needed to. he’d be lying if he said that his curiosity wasn’t piqued. it always was when he was around you.

you gulp. it was time to do what you’ve longed to do ever since the beginning of your stroll: give the ryomen sukuna a kiss on the cheek. you don’t think he’d be mad—at least he never seriously gets mad at you. only to get a reaction out of you since your responses are always ‘intensely amusing’—as he says.

“go on.” sukuna’s breath hits your cheeks. he was so close—too close that it made you even more nervous in a way. as if you hadn’t even had your first kiss yet.

you swallow your fears and just go for it. your lips attach to his cheek in the fraction of a second—the speed of light—before they leave. it was right under his right set of eyes.

you take a step back and clear your throat. you try to escape the embarrassment of sukuna’s possible reaction by continuing your stroll, though were stopped by a strong hand firmly grabbing your forearm.

“where’d you think you’re going?”

sukuna’s deep voice echoes through your ears. you were surprised to hear the tone of it; almost soft. a tone sukuna uses on rare occasions: in your presence.

you turn your head around and smile sheepishly at the king of curses before you. he doesn’t return the same (not that you expected him to), however he does unexpectedly ruffle your hair for a split second. or at least he attempts to.

his large and warm palm lands on top of your head and he gives it a little and subtle shake. sukuna had seen you do a similar action to someone else before, thus he concluded that he could do it to you. maybe as a form of endearment or. . whatever you used it as.

he did find the way you tried to scurry away after giving him a kiss very adorable. even if he wouldn’t say so out loud.

“now, come along. we don’t have all day.” sukuna nonchalantly mutters after retracting his hand. it left as fast as it came, though you were still stunned at the slight show of affection the king of curses returned.

you instantly catch up to sukuna again—walking next to him as fast as your legs could take you. you were a bit more at ease after you got a positive reaction to your little kiss. it was a pity that he didn’t smirk or laugh at you—maybe mocked you like he usually would. but that head pat made up for it.

even if it did leave your hair a little disheveled.

you couldn’t properly see sukuna’s face, but the faint smirk tugging at his lips was undeniably there. even if it was for just a split second.

“how very interesting.” sukuna mutters under his breath so you wouldn’t catch on. he sighs and shakes his head, unable to keep out that memory of you looking so cute—standing on the tip of your toes to plant a kiss on his cheek with your comically small hand on his jaw line. he doesn’t know why he found that to be so thrilling.

you flutter your eyelashes. you were curious about what he might have commented on, “may i ask what you had just said? i didn’t quite hear it.”

a short second of silence hangs before sukuna tilts his head to the right to look down at you again; his face expressionless, but still having a hint of a grin on his lips.

“i said you better hurry before i gobble you up right this instant.” he replies, (playfully) intimidating you with his sharp red eyes that glinted with a form of danger.

you shiver (though knew the threat was an empty one) and instantly pick up your pace. you even get ahead of him, walking as fast as your legs could. you answer with a curt ‘my apologies’ and walk like you actually have somewhere to be.

sukuna’s grin only grows as he sees you get ahead of him. if you had turned around, maybe you could have caught onto that light flicker of affection in his expression.

“i’m coming for you, little one.” sukuna adds just to ignite some more fear into you and you react as expected, “you’re not escaping me today.”

it was a funny sight; your reactions always make him enjoy his time with you even more than he already (secretly) was.

the way his body reacts in mysterious ways when you’re around, is still very much an unsolved riddle to the king of curses. and the reasons as to why you aren’t scared of him and can easily give him all your ‘love’ are also still yet to be discovered.

until then, sukuna will continue to enjoy teasing you.

[chuluoyi]

LOVER'S QUARREL

- fushiguro megumi x reader

“i can't do this anymore.” you and megumi are just too different; he's stoic, you're bubbly, he prefers solitude, you love being social. it starts with fights, words you don't mean, and ends with an event that would haunt him for a long time to come.

genre: angst, breaking up, post-breakup feelings, mentions and description of injury and blood, hurt/comfort, fluff in the end (you make up!)

note: dear god i’m finally getting this out of my drafts. loosely inspired by real life events i’ve seen around my friend’s relationship sooo it might hurt a bit 🤏🏻 but who can say no to angst to eventual fluff? tagging @lees-chaotic-brain and @kasumitenbaz (as per request in the ask!), you two are always here for my megumi works, thank you!! :3 and thank you for dropping by for the event!

a part of 1K MILESTONE EVENT

series masterlist | oneshot masterlist

Everyone pointed it out as a joke, that you liked him way more than he did you.

And you used to never let it ruffle you. To you, Megumi’s sternness and silence meant that he was comfortable with you. You never wanted him to change his ways just because now you were seeing each other.

But when you thought it over now, as you stood before him with an aghast expression and knives stabbing your kind, soft heart, you couldn’t help but do a double-take.

You were the one who confessed first. Most of the time, you were the one who initiated dates. You always texted him first, asking about his day, and even when he brushed you off, you would keep being this ball of sunshine and wished him a good day.

You never realized it before… that through everything, it has always been you. Unfailingly.

So how dare he spout this now?

“I can't do this anymore.”

"You... can't?" you spat out, feeling the first tendrils of anger course through you. "What exactly it is that you can't do? What do you even mean?"

"Look," Megumi stared at you squarely, and you thought now, that it was the coldest of eyes, straight and true. "It's always been like this between us lately. It's only right that we end this."

This, he said. He didn't even want to define your relationship anymore.

You scoffed. "And why do you think we always end up this way? Have you ever considered, even once, that it's because you make no effort at all?"

"I'm trying," Megumi quickly replied, almost in a hiss, and you almost recoiled. "But I just see that we'll end up nowhere, that's why I'm bringing this up now."

Oh, that freaking hurts. You boyfriend had just told you that this relationship would go nowhere. Right in your face.

Your eyes stung with tears, yet you fought to hold them back, fixing your gaze on the lamp overhead and inhaling deeply.

"You're... selfish," you stated, filled with ire. "You're always walking around eggshells around me, never telling me what is it that you really want—"

Megumi's unclouded eyes fixed on your trembling form. "We just disagree on a lot of things. You know it and it bothers you. It bothers me too. Rather than forcing our relationship, I think it's better—"

"It's always me!" you yelled then, lips quivering and eyes watering, unable to hold your emotions back any longer. "All dates, lunches—everything!" you locked your eyes with him, in mocking disbelief. "How can you say you're trying when, in truth, I'm the one putting in so much for us?!"

In that very second, Megumi thought that he hated seeing you like this. You were supposed to be the cheerful one in this relationship, and when he agreed to go out with you, he made an unspoken commitment to himself that he would at least not make you miserable.

And yet...

"...I'm sorry."

Came his reply, and you were sure that this was it.

And to rub the salt in your wound, he added, "I can't lie to you and say I haven't thought this for a while too."

As tears welled within you, you wondered and questioned what you lacked that led to this. However, the overwhelming sense of betrayal consuming your thoughts ultimately prevailed over any other emotions.

Now he could've appeared before you as a stranger and you wouldn't bat an eye, as the cold steel in his tone said, "And if blaming me is what it takes to make you feel better, then so be it."

You couldn't pinpoint the source of your sudden boldness, but in the next hot minute, you marched past him, your shoulder harshly colliding with his in a deliberate, almost spiteful manner—which, indeed, was your intention—and then you ran.

Which led to the next scene: you found yourself bawling your eyes out in the girls' lavatory.

Yuji and Nobara saw everything unfolding right before their eyes. They hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but you and Megumi were literally breaking up right the middle of their shared classroom, and it was hard not to follow the discourse until the end.

"Are you okay?" Nobara had come to your side, ensuring privacy by locking the restroom door out of your consideration. You were a sobbing mess, attempting to wipe the overflowing tears away while letting out all your emotions.

"He's..." Your voice faltered amid sobs as you gazed at your steadfast friend, your throat clogging up. "He said... he's been wanting t-to... break up with m-me..."

"That's okay, that's okay..." Nobara brought you to her arms, patting your back in reassurance. "Fushiguro is insensitive like that... don't cry over him now. He's just a wimp, okay?"

"Why is it me?" you asked her, voice brittle, still shaking with tears. "I t-tried everything! Being the supportive girlfriend..."

"If he can't appreciate what you did, then the problem lies with him," your friend stated, traces of irritation brewing in her resolute gaze. And as she firmly grasped your wrist, her next words resonated. "Not you."

. . .

"Do you really have to break her heart like that?" Yuji fidgeted with his hoodie, staring at his best friend with a blend of confusion and sympathy.

Megumi sighed, finally ruffling his hair into a mess, as if expressing his own state of mind. “This is for the best.”

Yuji’s eyebrows visibly creased. “How is this ‘for the best’? She’s miserable, and you…” he assessed him, scanning him from head to toe, “it doesn’t seem you’re faring any better too.”

“The longer she is with me, the unhappier she will be.” Megumi glanced at the bathroom’s direction. “She can deserve better.”

He was always too quiet, too boring, not able to match your energy too. He couldn’t fault you for expecting more, whereas he was just not exactly built for your expectations.

Megumi really thought he wanted it to end. At one point, it even felt like a chore, but…

How strange. Why did it feel like something was clawing at his chest?

Time heals. Megumi knew that by theory, but he really did see it firsthand when he saw you all giggling and happy again three weeks after he initiated the breakup.

With Hakari.

“Yo, what are you glaring at?” Panda asked, but Megumi didn’t pay him any mind.

An upperclassman, Hakari Kinji, was naturally cool and talented. He was laid back, knew how to have fun—all in all, a total opposite of Fushiguro Megumi altogether.

Three weeks. It’s only been three weeks since then.

“Megumi?”

Wait… Aren’t three weeks too fast to get over your ex?

“Megumi!”

“Huh?” he turned to the sentient panda with a jerk. “Oh, what is it?”

He looked at him with a concerned gaze. "Why do you look so scary? It's almost as if you're about to punch someone..."

But who was he to argue? He had no right to be upset now.

"Is it Kinji?" Panda gasped, finally putting two and two together when he followed his line of sight. "Oh Megumi... but you—"

"Just shut up, please," he blurted then, a hint of annoyance in his tone. With that, Panda didn't pursue it further, leaving him with his thoughts.

From where he was at the field, he could clearly see your radiant smile for Hakari. It was clear that the two of you shared a degree of friendship, but Megumi never knew that you two were that close.

...huh?

Why did the sight irritate him so suddenly? Why did his chest twinge again?

What a fool. You're the one driving her away, you idiot.

Suddenly these memories popped up one by one—

Of you suddenly hugging him from behind in an attempt to surprise him.

How he pressed his lips on the crown of your head when you fall asleep on his shoulder.

How you would give him that dopey smile when he pulled you close.

But on harder days after missions gone wrong, he’d ignore you altogether— the slight disappointment in your smile then. How your expression fell when he told you to go. How you slumped and looked back in hopes of him changing his mind.

“Haaaah.” Megumi turned away, unwilling to keep watching you any longer. Why? Why hadn’t it occurred to him before now?

Why did he long for you now? Why not before, when you were still his?

They were right. It seems people tend to desire what isn't meant for them.

What could have been more painfully awkward than being sent into a mission with your ex-boyfriend?

You would kill Gojo for this. Or at least give him the lowest possible score in his teaching evaluation for the year. How could he? Your breakup was an infamous public spectacle, so this setup was undoubtedly intentional!

You were losing your head over this, and yet your ex-boyfriend...

"Keep your guard up," Megumi reminded curtly, in a warning tone. He looked as vigilant and straight as always, as if he wasn't even bothered.

You threw him a dirty look, offended. "You don't have to tell me twice."

This just cranked up the discomfort to an excruciating level. The mix of unresolved tension and memories—okay, you might be an emo, but how were you supposed to be cool with all of these hanging in the air?

Your site of exorcism was an abandoned warehouse, and the cursed spirit in question was supposed to be a grade 3. You two were grade 2 sorcerers now, so you were a perfect fit to exorcise it. But there was indeed this unease in the air that you couldn't put your finger to.

"Isn't it awfully too quiet?" you unwittingly muttered, staring at the darkness of the wall. You couldn't feel any cursed energy belonging to any possible malevolent entity, and that was what unsettled you the most.

Megumi frowned at your line of sight. "It is. Stay close."

You blinked at what he said, and before you knew it, the familiar scent of him being near to you made your entire body burst with this equally familiar warmth. When you looked up to him, seeing the solid sharpness in that dark eyes of his and his jaw set, dead butterflies in your chest rose back to life again, against your heartbreak and better judgement.

Stay close, he said... So he is worried...

And in an attempt to hide how flustered you were, you looked down.

You walked a few good steps, when suddenly he asked, "So, are you with Hakari-senpai now?"

"Huh?" You spun around, your expression a mix of surprise and confusion.

"You two seem close."

Seem close? Seem close... wait, so Megumi had noticed...?

Suddenly, you felt incited and it made you angry. "That's none of your business," your voice carried a sharp edge, hissing. And you knew you were being a bit mean by adding, "You broke up with me, so why do you even care?"

In that moment, Megumi could've sworn his chest throbbed. Your cutting tone pierced directly into his heart, lodging itself there.

You had all rights to be annoyed, and he knew that. Why did that question even slip out of him?

"Nah, nevermind," he mumbled in response, looking away.

Awkwardness lingered afterwards. You hated this, but no, you weren't above being petty. He had broken your heart and it still stung even now. If your intentionally biting words did to him even a fraction of what he made you feel, then you would find a small sense of satisfaction in it.

But you weren't able to ponder about your mess of feelings further when Megumi abruptly yanked your arm, his voice soaking with urgency, "It's here!"

Sure enough, the grotesque cursed spirit with the shape of a giant bee broke through the walls with a bang. The two of you immediately readied your fighting stance. Megumi was ready with his divine dogs, while you with your cursed weapon.

For a while, you engaged the cursed spirit with all you had. You were trying to focus on the enemy, but you couldn't help but notice the way Megumi always looked at you every few seconds, checking for any signs of injury or harm.

Frankly speaking, he trusted your strength and knew that you were a capable sorcerer. You had been paired in a mission before and he knew both your potential and shortcomings. It was just there was something about this place that had his senses on high alert.

And his fears were proven true when you yelped and were flung onto the grimy floor. "Y/N!"

"I'm fine!" you shouted in a rush, scrambling to your feet. However, as you spun towards him, your scream tore through the hall as you caught sight of the bee lurking behind him. "Megumi!"

He got distracted. The bee quickly latched onto him and almost stung him, until he wrestled it off and summoned Nue and exorcised it.

You went to his side that instant. "Are you okay?!"

"I am." But then he winced and almost fell on his knees if you didn't have a secure grip on him. He savored your touch and breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that now you two were safe.

"Megumi! Oh god!" Panic surged through you as you pulled him close. His side was bleeding, and you widened your eyes at the sight.

"I'm okay, I promise," he rasped, looking you in the eyes. "What abo—"

Then you saw it, the flicker from deep from that corner of platform, and suddenly, you grasped the source of the unease that had been lingering within you all this time. It wasn't the bee Megumi had just exorcised—

At that moment, there was no room for thought, one thing was certain: you didn't want him to get hurt more.

He didn't manage to finish his sentence when suddenly you pushed him away with so much force he never thought you had. Everything crashed so suddenly, he didn't have the time to brace himself or grab you with him, as another cursed bee appeared out of nowhere and—

Reality flashed before his eyes as he stared at you in sheer horror. At how the cursed spirit tore your body, sinking its hollow stinger in you.

You didn't really know what happened next. Everything was muffled—the frantic movements around you turned into a blur, along with Megumi's yells. Otherworldly pain coursed through your entire being and your ears rang, then everything in your line of sight became distorted and faded, along with your consciousness. Next and the last thing you knew was Megumi's battered face, a final imprint before you succumbed to the void.

Megumi had exorcised the remaining cursed spirit and staggered to his feet—falling a few times, but he made his way towards you through gritted teeth. You are hurt. He forced himself to get to you and pull you into his arms.

And suddenly, suddenly, nothing mattered anymore as overwhelming terror consumed him upon seeing you. Blood streamed from your abdomen so much that it made a continuous pool.

"You stupid—!" He choked out, voice hitching. You were no longer conscious and it devastated him even more. "Hey, hey? Wake up—hells—"

You, who did everything you could to save your relationship. You, who cried tears for him when he blatantly broke your heart. And you, who put himself first—and now facing the consequences.

It crashed upon him in that very second, the clarity. What was he thinking back then? He still loves you.

"If you die on me, I won't forgive you."

Megumi scooped you in his arms, pressing you close to his chest, the blood seeping from his wound be damned as he looked at your serene face. His heart shattered in the worst way possible and he almost wheezed at the sticky sensation of your blood—and how lifeless you felt in his grasp—but he willed it away.

"Don't," his broken rasp echoed the walls as he took each step to get both of you out of this hellhole. He winced and hissed at his own injury, chewing his lip in frustration, at how helpless he was.

"Don't leave me."

It was like a distant, hazy memory.

Was it a memory though? No. It seemed far too real for that.

The throbbing headache pounding through your skull and shivers that wracked your body pulled you back to reality. There was a heavy pressure on your abdomen and any movement sent sharp pain shooting through you.

You gradually opened your eyes, squinting against the brightness. You were in a hospital gown, an IV was injected on your arm, and the sterile scent made your stomach twist, as nausea creeping through your guts. Your vision was still blurry as you tried to look around to find someone who waited for you. As you slowly turned your head to the side, you saw him, sitting in the chair right next your bed.

Megumi was sleeping in such uncomfortable position, his head resting on the edge of your bed. He appeared peaceful, almost childlike, devoid of his usual stoic demeanor.

Your heartstrings were tugged at this rare sight. He also sustained injuries and yet... he was waiting for you to wake up, here.

Your chest swelled with warmth, which was quickly followed by a sting of heartbreak. Still, you two broke up...

You jolted, and the inadvertent movement sent a wave of pain that seemed to paralyze your nerves, causing you to whimper. The noise woke Megumi from his slumber, as he shot his eyes open in alarm, catching your hand in his.

"Hey... Are you okay?" Megumi worriedly looked down at you with a visible frown, and the grimace of pain on your face, accompanied by trembling lips, was enough of an answer. He hastily scrambled out in slight panic, "I'll get Ieiri-san."

When Shoko came and got you the painkillers, your pain receded somewhat. Through it all, Megumi stood there, casting concerned glances in your way.

"Bedrest for the week," Shoko stated firmly, assessing your wound with a no-nonsense expression. "Your injury isn't minor—it's serious enough that you're strongly advised against excessive movement."

You could only nod in response. Megumi bowed. "Thank you, Ieiri-san." Once the doctor departed, silence settled over the room once more.

“Why did you do that?” he quietly asked then, referring to what you did for him. And when you turned to him, you saw it clearly.

He looked pale, and there was this haunted look in his eyes. It broke your heart a little.

"You were hurt." Your voice came out dry, and you realized firsthand just how parched you were. Seeing Megumi looking down never quite sat right with you. He was meant to be an unwavering presence, someone strong enough to sway your convictions.

However, a pang struck when he countered with stern eyes, "You didn't have to do that."

...he was right. You didn't have to. What he didn't know was that you were still holding on these stupid feelings, which drove you to shield him. It made you ponder: if your roles were reversed, would he not step in to protect you at all?

"Why are you here?" You weren't sure if the bitterness in your tone was evident, but you continued anyway. "You don't have to be here either."

"Don't have to?" His gaze bore disbelief, as if not believing your words. "I'm—"

"If it's because I saved you, Megumi—"

“Do not even think, even for a moment, that I won’t be concerned over you.” His voice, deep and hoarse, struck you to the core, silencing your words. “Never. I always, always want you to be safe.”

Your mind became a blank slate. Suddenly, all that mattered was his voice.

"Don't you realize how terrifying it was? Seeing you like that?" Megumi spat, his green eyes shining with intensity, teeth gritted and fists clenched. "How could you even think that I wouldn't be here—" his breath hitched, and then his lips trembled slightly, "—for you?"

You blinked quickly, a feeling stirred within you—stemming from that cursed, fragile heart of yours to be exact, evident from the rapid thumping in your chest.

You dumbly uttered, "But we are—"

"Oh, Goddamnit." Megumi cursed, and honestly you were taken aback. It wasn't really in him to swear, so this really bugged him. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration, and despite the situation, your heart skipped a beat at the sight. Even a mess in a hospital gown, your ex-boyfriend was still undeniably attractive.

He stared at you squarely in the eye, unflinching, steadfast and true, the very image of Fushiguro Megumi you admired from afar and fell in love with in the first place half a year ago. "You don't have to... say anything, if you don't want to. Right now... just hear me out."

And the things he said next... all of them, you could say, caught you entirely off guard.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not trying hard enough, and—damn it, for making you sad. I never, ever wanted to see you that upset."

Megumi drew in a sharp breath, averting his gaze. "And for days, I've wondered if you and Hakari-senpai are now a thing... and you know what? I hate it so much. I know I have no grounds to feel this way, after what I did, but..."

And like a train wreck, his final words hit you hard. Tears welled up in your eyes in immediate response.

“I'm a loser, and a coward too, maybe,” he shrugged, a tinge of self-deprecation in his tone. “And I suck at telling people my feelings, but I love you. I still do.”

A sob slipped out of your throat and you hastily pulled the blanket over your face, much to his surprise. He thought he had worsened things, with the way you were turning away from him.

But then, from beneath the blanket, in a croaky voice, you proclaimed, "Fushiguro Megumi, you're a complete and utter idiot."

And Megumi didn't know that he had been holding back his breath as he chuckled heartily, relieved that you would still take his ass back after this prolonged mess. He knew he still had a lot to make up for and was determined to show it through his actions.

"Maybe I am, yeah."

"That's possibly the longest shit you have ever spouted in one breath."

"Yeah..."

But he got his chance back, and he knew that you would be alright. Both of you are.

On one sunny day...

"Hey, are you alone?"

Megumi glanced up from his phone, only to be met with a random girl standing in front of him, batting her eyelashes with an ambiguous intent. He blinked at her curiously.

"No. Can I help you?"

The girl twirled her hair suggestively. "Ah, you see... I see you all in your lonesome and I think you're quite cute—"

The hell? Megumi frowned, and he was really about to give this bimbo a piece of his mind when—

Oh, oh. Forget that. Megumi's attention snapped to you on the opposite side of the crossroad. All pretty and dolled up with that crop tee and miniskirt he once mentioned would look great on you by a slip of tongue—that accidental comment earned him your teasing quips for weeks already.

"Sorry, I'm here for my girlfriend. Bye."

Abruptly dismissing the girl, he didn't catch how comically offended she was for being turned down in a span of 20 seconds. He took big strides towards you, as you crossed the street, and you immediately beamed when you caught the sight of his face.

"Megumi!"

Ah, this is going to be a good day, he thought. As he gazed at your pretty face, and caught your hand in his, clasping it tightly, reveling in your scent and the warmth of your presence beside him—

He was content, and once again it dawned on him, that he likes you so, so damn much.

"Let's get started on our date, shall we?"

[kissitbttr]

this is miguel o’hara being a dick

pairing: miguel o’hara x fem!reader

-

miguel knows he’s fucked.

he has been neglecting you, putting his work above your needs and ditched on dates he can’t count with his fingers. at first you were okay, given that you’re dating such a busy man like him, you understand the consequences.

but you’ve had enough. there were nights where you cooked dinner, only to be left untouched by him or where you softly cried yourself in the middle of the night because he was still out. the only time he comes home is when you’re already asleep, then he left to the HQ in the morning before you’ve gotten the chance to wake up.

you confronted him about this. paid a visit to his office before going to work. Jess and Lyla had warned you to not disturb him but you managed to make them back off with a single frightening look.

yes. they are scared of you. a lot of them are. they do not want to test you at all.

the moment you stepped into his office, he didn’t even bother to look. eyes were just too focused on his work that he assumed Jess was the one who walked in.

“oh, you’re fucking your co-worker now?” your tone laced with sarcasm and anger with arms crossed over your chest,

hearing the familiar voice, he had never whipped his head so fast. “y/n? what are you doing here?”

“well” you start, heels clicking against the floor as you step towards him. “since my boyfriend has been MIA for almost a week i figured i should stopped by.”

his head shook, turning his focus back to what he thought mattered most. “not right now, mi amor. I’m working.”

“i can see that, dumbass” you respond in a cold tone. frowning as to why he couldn’t take one second off from that god damn screen. “you and me are going to get breakfast together. now. before i go to work.”

“i told you I can’t. I’m busy” he replies, brushing you off with his hand. “next time.”

“i’m a busy woman too!” your voice shakes, wanting so bad to scream at him and throw that tiny desk at his head. “but I always want to make time for you, Miguel!”

no response. he muttered something under his breath but you couldn’t hear him.

un-fucking-believable

“you’re such a fucking asshole, you know that?” tone laced with venom as you spit the words. clenching your fists by your side as you struggle to hold back the tears. “i feel like this relationship is one sided, the only person that is truly making an effort is me. you don’t—“

Miguel couldn’t take it anymore. he threw a desk and it went flying, thankfully it didn’t hit you. though your eyes went wide in shock, a loud gasp left your lips as you covered your mouth with your hands.

“you’re right! I don’t! I don’t care about some silly little fucking breakfast when the universe depends on me!” he pointed at himself as his irises turned red when he looked at you. his breathing went heavy and he still wasn’t aware how scared you were at him at that point.

“do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to keep all this shit together?! how many people will die if i don’t do what i gotta do! I don’t always like it, y/n but i have to do it! and here you are trying to play house with me it’s fucking pathetic!” he scoffed, putting his hands on hips.

oh he did not realize how much his words hurt.

the room was filled with silence. you stared at him in disbelief but remained a stoic expression. you were taught better than to be weak before any men. Miguel was no exception. your mother would be disappointed if you let a man win.

“wow” you breathed, nodding. “that was a good speech actually, the longest one I’ve ever heard you talking” you tried to sound sarcastic but how you felt and how you sounded failed you.

Miguel was quick to notice this and his features quickly soften. he reached out quickly to hold you.

“cariño i—“

“I’m returning back to my apartment by five. do not fucking look for me” it was final. the way you said it, how your eyes remained empty as you spoke to him. Miguel knew better than to test you,

but he just did and now he’s paying the price,

his heart broke when he heard you said that. you were so tired of him and you just wanted him back. you want your man back but he couldn’t see how that mattered to you.

“baby, please—“

you held your hand as you turned around. “don’t you even think about sending Jess or Miles my way.”

with that you walked out of his office without uttering another word. leaving him speechless and heartbroken. he knew better than to follow you out, it would just make things worse. he was just going to let you cool off.

he didn’t know how long it was gonna take.

it has been almost a month that you two have been living separately. and he’s losing his mind. he can’t sleep, he can’t eat, he can barely walk out of the house without seeing all the things that remind him of you. the team even sensed something is wrong because he has been more short tempered than before and it almost made the rest of spider society terrified of talking to him.

he’s gotten more violent, that’s for sure. every enemy he encountered, he would leave them bleed with their faces unrecognizable. it was his way of taking his stress out. not exactly healthy but it’ll do for now.

but he thinks that this has gotten too far. he misses you terribly, your scent, your laugh, your voice, your body, and mostly… your pussy

God, the amount of times he sniffed your panties while he jacked off as the image of you clouded his mind was simply not enough.

and now here he stands before your apartment door. dressed nicely in a white buttoned up shirt with his sleeves rolled to the elbows and a pair of black pants. his ring cladded fingers nervously grip around the boquete as the other hand shoved into his pocket.

Miguel had never been this nervous before. toeing his shoes and tapping his toes against the floor rapidly. it’s probably already been fifteen minutes that he’s standing like that staring at your door. thinking far too carefully what he wants to say.

he decides it’s now or never as he raises his fist and knock softly against the wooden door, hoping that you’re home.

“coming!” he hears your voice, his stomach somersaults hearing that after what it felt like a thousand year. “i am so hungry, why are you delivery guys always taking so—“

soon as you open the door, you freeze. definitely not the takeout delivery boy and instead it’s the one person you’ve been avoiding for God knows how long.

Miguel’s mouth hangs open slightly as he slowly taking in the sight of the gorgeous woman before him. you put on your favorite lime green night gown that stops just above your knees with a white silky robe, your hair fall down gracefully. natural curls framing your face. eyes glinting under the light, he almost falls to his knees and thank the Lord for your existence.

beauty doesn’t even begin to describe how you look tonight.

Miguel realizes how he probably looks like an idiot. clearing his throat to regain his composure as he smiles awkwardly at you. “Hi.”

you stare at him as your features then showcase a displeased expression. “what are you doing here?”

you’re leaning your body against the doorframe, arms crossed in annoyance. eyes flickering from his face to the flowers he’s holding and back up to his eyes. as much as you hate to see him, you can’t help that little feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you see the flowers he’s holding.

tulips. your favorite

he takes a one step closer to your frame, breathing out a sigh as he looks down at you. “I’m sorry, mi amor.”

that earns a scoff from you, looking away. “good start.”

“i was a horrible boyfriend.” he admits, gulping as he sees how sadness and exhaustion taking over your face just like that. “you don’t deserve that. what i said to you that day… none of it was true. you were not… pathetic, nor were the idea of having breakfast together… I appreciate every single thing we’ve done together, baby. believe me, por favor…”

a hard stare is the only thing he gets from you. the way your lips form into an angry pout and how your eyes seem to get tired and bored from his confession.

you’re a difficult person to please. he knows that.

“i know that being stress is no excuse of what I’ve done… I should’ve—fuck I should’ve done better. a month without you was like hell, mi corazon. ay, me sentí como si estuviera perdiendo la cabeza.” he sighs in frustration, head shaking as he recalls many sleepless nights. “i love you so so much. i do not want to go through that again … i know that it’s going to take forever to get your trust back and everything, but i swear on my mother’s grave that i—“

“stop talking”

he shuts his mouth after that. eyes looking up to you when he realizes you’re talking to him after a prolonged silence that’s taking over.

seeing how broken he looks almost feels like your heart got plucked. as mean as you are or as much as you wanted to look like you don’t care, you can’t when it comes to Miguel. you love this man far too much and despite his cold cold persona, that’s a huge sweetheart underneath.

“you hurt me, Miguel.” eyes casting down the floor as you try to keep your voice low. “you threw a desk to my direction…”

he shakes his head at that, resisting the urge to cradle your cheek. “lo siento, mi amor. I didn’t mean—“

“yes i know, i heard you.” you sigh, eyes closed momentarily. “you scared me”

Miguel feels his heart breaks when he hears how your voice breaks. he carefully lifts his hand to softly palm your cheek, thumb grazing against the skin. he exhales a soft sigh when you aren’t pushing him off.

“I didn’t mean to do that to you, my love. fuck, I’ve hurt you. i will never forgive myself for that. i was supposed to be the one who protect you and i was being a huge asshole.”

“a cute one though” you pout at him,

he chuckles at that, feeling the tension between you two are finally cutting down. “you’re too sweet, baby… after all i had done to you”

“nothing compared to how you treated me for the past two and a half years.” you smile sweetly at him, hand wrapping around his wrist. feeling at home once he holds you in his palm. “still a good man.”

he shakes his head in disagreement. “no, no that doesn’t excuse it… i was in the wrong.”

you hum in response, looking at the pretty flowers still in his hand. “are those for me?”

he nods with a smile, “you’re my only woman, no?”

you bite the inside of your cheek as you smile, taking it from his grasp as you sniff the pretty petals. “i love them. thank you.”

he once again goes quiet, taking another step closer. eyes looking down at your glossy lips and he can’t take it anymore. he doesn’t care if he’s stepping boundaries here. “i miss you, cariño. can i show you just how much?”

his offer sends shiver down your spine, making it impossible for you to stand still. Miguel always knows your sweet spot, how to make your knees feel wobbly without having him to touch you.

you do miss him touching you,

“i have a ballet class to teach tomorrow, papi. Saturday morning class, you remember ?” a pout formed on your lips, yet you still allow him to pull you close to him as he closes the door behind. “plus don’t you have work too? i bet Jess needs you.”

Migue nearly growls at you calling him ‘papi’. his jeans growing tight as you look up to him with doe eyes that you know he loves. though sometimes, you don’t understand the effect you have on him.

“that can wait… you’re more important to me than anything” he whispers, giving your open hand a kiss. large palm coming down to grip your waist, giving it a light squeeze. “do you want me too?”

you respond with a slow nod, biting back a smile as you interlock your hand with his pulling him inside. his smirk grows wider as he leans over to capture your mouth in his,

“let me fuck you real good then we can come home, eh mi vida?” he promises against your lips, slipping your soft silky robe off of you before picking you up in bridal style causing to shriek and giggle,

“i wanna hear you scream my name.”

-

part 2?

[yeonzzzn]

🤍give up heaven: sunghoon

pairing: sunghoon x afab!reader word count: 10.6k

synopsis: when you run into your best friend's ex-boyfriend at your favorite coffee shop thinking it was just a coincidence until seeing him became a daily thing. You can't get him out of your head and start to feel guilty at the very thought of him and things take a turn when he starts making advances towards you.

genre: hockey player!hoon with small mentions of figure skater!hoon, ex-bestfriend bf!hoon, hoon's ex-girlfriend best friend, friends to lovers, slight smut.

warnings: swearing, implied sex, make-out session, fingering, jerking off, verbal fight between reader, the ex, and sunghoon, MINORS DNI. lmk if i've missed anything!

You tried to avert your eyes when you saw him walk into the coffee shop. Pulling the scarf around your neck up higher and turning your face in the opposite direction. 

His voice echoed throughout the small shop, ordering his regular drink. Why do you still remember how he liked his coffee?

You slowly glanced up, his back was facing towards you, his hand reaching for his wallet from the back pocket of his blue jeans. 

After paying, he stepped back from the counter. You quickly turned your head away again, praying he didn’t see you or would even notice you. 

“Y/N?” 

Well, shit.

There's no point in hiding now. You slowly lifted your head, seeing the soft smile on his face as he slightly leaned to the side to get a look at your face, “It really is you.” 

You awkwardly smile, “Yes, it’s me.” 

Get your shit together, Y/N, come on.

He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped short when his name was called, “Sunghoon! Your iced coffee is ready!” 

“Be right back,” his knuckles tapped on the table, his smile growing. 

You carefully watched as he got his coffee and made his way back to your table, pulling the chair across from you out and seating himself. 

“How have you been?” he asked excitedly, his long fingers wrapping around his coffee, taking a small sip, “It’s been what? A year?” 

You nodded, wrapping your fingers around your warm coffee, “I see you still drink iced coffee even during the winter, some things never change huh?” 

Sunghoon softly chuckled, his smile just growing brighter and wider, his natural fangs peeking from his lips, “Everyone knows iced coffee is superior,” he leaned his elbows onto the table, “Your hair is longer, it looks good. You look good.” 

You smiled, “Thank you, you look really good as well, Sunghoon.” 

Sunghoon gave you a soft smirk and flexed his arms, “Why thank you! Been working out a lot lately.” 

You rolled your eyes and took another sip of your coffee, “You really haven’t changed.” 

His laugh was enough to make you laugh as well, the corners of your lips curving upwards no matter how hard you tried to push it down. 

It felt like old times. 

Speaking about old times…

His smile finally faded, the happy expression he once had was also gone, his face relaxing into a kinda of sad softness. 

His voice trembled, “How is uhh…how is she?” his eyes darted to the corner of the table. 

Oh…he’s still in love with her.

Your lips thinned into a line, trying to figure out what information was appropriate to give out. 

“She’s really good.” it wasn’t a total lie. 

Sunghoon nodded, the corner of his lips barely curling, “That’s… um…that’s good then. I’m glad she’s doing well.” 

It broke your heart that he couldn’t even say your best friend's name. It must still hurt even after a year. 

Sunghoon dated your best friend for almost three years. You remember when the two of you first met him at your college's hockey game. 

He bumped into the two of you, spilling his soda all down your best friend's outfit. Oh, man was she pissed. It didn’t take Sunghoon long to convince her to let him make it up to her. 

After that, they were inseparable. 

Sunghoon was a part of the hockey team, but due to a leg injury, he had to sit out until he was completely healed. But that didn’t stop him from attending every hockey game to support his teammates. He even dragged your best friend along with him. Which eventually led you to tag along as well. 

The three of you became that trio that was inseparable. A package deal. If you saw one of us, the other two were sure to be right behind. 

Everything was perfect until it wasn’t. Their relationship got toxic. They fought more than normally and on hangout days, either your best friend was missing, or Sunghoon was missing. Nothing felt right and the air between your friend group grew thick. Hard to breathe. 

Sunghoon eventually stopped talking to you, and then they broke up. Your best friend stopped hanging around you and slowly stopped speaking to you as well. You figured it was due to the heartbreak, that she just needed her space. You didn’t think it would lead to your friendship slowly becoming nonexistent. 

You two weren’t exactly best friends anymore, but after she healed from the breakup, she came back around. It just wasn’t the same as before Sunghoon came into the picture. 

You two still barely talk, and barely see each other, but still kept that contact and hung out when you could. 

You never understood why she pushed you away, but the heart does crazy things when it’s hurting. 

And you haven’t seen Sunghoon since a couple of months before the breakup, until today. A little over a year later. 

“Well,” Sunghoon’s voice brought you out of your deep thoughts, “I have to get going, need to catch practice.” 

Your eyebrows raised, “You’re playing still?” 

Sunghoon’s doctor finally cleared him to get back on the ice after almost a year of being off it, but due to the team setup they had at that time, he wasn’t able to fully rejoin the team again until around the time of the breakup. He was able to practice and attend the games as a sub if needed, but it was enough for him to keep his mind busy for a little bit. 

You’ve secretly kept up with the scores of the hockey team, knowing Sunghoon was back on the team officially. But after a while you quit. Clearing Sunghoon from your life completely. 

Sunghoon nodded, “Hell yeah I’m still playing, who do you think I am?” he teased, standing up from the table, “But, I am actually not going to hockey practice.” 

The surprise must have shown on your face because Sunghoon was giggling like a child at your confusion, “I joined an ice skating team as a figure skater.” 

You sat up straighter in your chair, “Since when?!”

“Since…well.” He tucked his bottom lip between his teeth, it was all you needed to know. 

Being a sub on the hockey team eventually wasn’t enough for Sunghoon to keep his brain busy after the breakup. Until he was officially able to play again, he needed another distraction. Come to find out he loved figure skating as much as hockey, deciding even after being fully back on the hockey team, he kept up with figure skating as well. 

You slowly nodded, “I am really glad you’re doing well for yourself, Sunghoon.” 

He softly nodded back, “Thank you, Y/N. I have to get going, the ice is calling my name.”

You waved at him as he walked to the entrance, him turning back around as his back touched the doors, “It was nice seeing you!” 

You agreed. 

—

Your best friend sighed as another customer walked into the smoothie shop, holding up her index finger towards you as she walked away and up to the register, taking the customer's order. 

You leaned against the counter, moving the seat back and forth with your hips like a child. 

“Okay,” she said, returning to you after the customer's smoothie was made, “What were you telling me?” 

“Just that the materials you missed in bio today weren't too hard. I took extra notes for you,” you pulled into your backpack taking out the pretty iced blue folder, “Here they are!” you pulled out the stack of notes you made for her, her taking them and holding them to her chest.

“Thank you SO MUCH YN!!!” she placed the papers in a drawer under the counter, “I could kiss you right now. What would I do without you?” 

Probably survive perfectly fine since you had no problem cutting me off after you and Sunghoon broke up. 

You shrugged with a smile, “Fail bio.” 

She laughed and nodded, “Yeah, probably. But I have you to help keep me in the loop!” 

You honestly hated how the two of you could go DAYS sometimes even WEEKS without talking or seeing each other yet she has no problem acting as if nothing ever happened. 

But she was all you had, so you played along with her. 

You dropped your backpack onto the floor, wondering if telling her the other thing was right or wrong. 

You decided to anyway. 

“I also saw Sunghoon the other day.” 

Her movements slowed and her smile faded, “Is that so?” 

You nodded, “We talked for a couple of minutes, but he had to go practice, so it was a short moment.” 

You could see the gears were turning in her brain, “Practice? Guess he was able to get back on the team after all. That’s good at least.” 

“He actually is figure skating now too, that’s where he was headed.” 

Your best friend’s eyes widened, “Wow, I did not see that one coming.” 

You agreed, “It was definitely not something I’d expected Park Sunghoon to do, but I guess it kinda suits him.” 

Your friend nodded, seeing how deep in thought she was. 

You wanted to ask her to speak her mind, but unfortunately, the two of you weren’t that close anymore. 

A couple more customers walked in, sending her back away from you. 

You stood from the seat, grabbing your things, giving her a smile and wave as you walked out. You only came to give her the notes she missed anyway. 

Usually, when she skips out of class she gets the notes from one of the boys she’s secretly messing around with. But every blue moon she asks you. 

You guessed it was the only way to keep in contact with you in some way. 

—

You quickly stepped into the coffee shop, brushing off the slight snow from your hair, ready to get a sip of your favorite coffee. 

The barista noticed you, giving you his famous thumbs-up, “Already on it YN!” 

You gave him a thumbs-up back. You were so happy you discovered this place, it became one of your comfort places to be. It’s quiet enough to do homework or read, the coffee is amazing and all the baristas know you and your order. What isn’t there to love?

“Fancy seeing you here again,” you whipped around, seeing Sunghoon sitting in your usual spot, a book in his hands and his iced coffee half empty on the table. 

Your brain spasmed, what was he doing here again?

You just nodded, “You’re in my spot.” 

Sunghoon shrugged, “I can move?” 

Well shit, now you feel bad. 

You shook your head, “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind sharing.” 

Sunghoon smiled, eyes flickering back down to his book. 

The barista called your name, turning your attention back to him, “Thank you, Taehyun.” 

His sharky smile warms your heart, “Always,” his eyes darted over to Sunghoon then back to you, “Do you know him?” 

You sighed, “Yes, he’s an old friend.” 

Taehyun nodded, his tongue sliding into his cheek, “He’s been here every day since the last time you were here.” 

You froze, narrowing your eyes, “Honestly?” 

Taehyun nodded again, “I just wanted to make sure you were okay and that he wasn’t some creep.” 

You smiled softly at him, “No need to worry. He’s harmless.” 

Taehyun gave you a half smile, then walked off to finish working. 

You sat down in front of Sunghoon, his eyes not leaving the page of his book. 

You cleared your throat, taking a sip of your coffee. 

Sunghoon glanced up for a second at your throat clearing, “Yes?” 

You cupped your hands around your coffee, “What?” 

Sunghoon sighed and closed his book, setting it on the table, “You only clear your throat like that when you have something to say.” 

Damn, does he remember the small details of you?

“You remember that?” 

Sunghoon chuckled, picking up his iced coffee, “YN, I’ve known you for almost, what? five years? You think I’d just forget everything?” 

Well, no…just didn’t think you’d care enough to remember. you didn’t date me after all. 

All you could do was shrug, “My barista told me you’ve been here every day,”

Sunghoon raised a brow as he sipped on his coffee, finishing it off, “Your barista?” 

“Not like that!” you snapped quietly, wishing you could jump over the table and tackle him, “I’m a regular here, Taehyun just happens to be the barista who always takes care of me.” 

Sunghoon mouthed out a “wow” and leaned back into the seat, “First name bases too?” 

“Sunghoon,” his name falling off your lips felt foreign, mostly since you were speaking to him, “Why are you here every day?” 

He thinned out his lips into a line, eyes looking down at his Converse, “Been looking for a good coffee shop to regular, and this one surprised me when I first came in here. You just so happened to be here the day I decided to try it.”

That sounds…completely true. This coffee shop is incredible. You don’t blame him for wanting to become a regular. It was all a coincidence. 

You sipped down your coffee, feeling the stare of his eyes, “Yes?” 

“So back to Taehyun being your barista,” 

You laughed, kicking your leg into his shin, “Stop!” 

Sunghoon’s fangs slipped out as he smiled. 

—

Sunghoon’s appearance in the coffee shop became more regular, just like he said. 

Taehyun knew his order by heart, just like yours, and would always have it ready the moment he saw Sunghoon walk in. 

You had to admit, it felt good having him back in your life. It felt like old times when you’d hang out when your best friend was too busy working. You three all used to be so close. 

Yet you didn’t have the heart to tell her you were even hanging out with Sunghoon again. It technically wasn’t even hanging out, you two just happened to sit, talk, and drink coffee together at your favorite coffee shop. 

Another week has flown by with Sunghoon making his appearance at the shop.

You laughed together over a book you both read, Sunghoon feeling Taehyun’s eyes on you. 

You stood up, “I’m heading to the bathroom,” 

Sunghoon nodded, his eyes darting to Taehyun, watching him as he watched you walk to the bathroom. A small sigh escaped Taehyun’s lips. 

Taehyun then made eye contact with him, and the look he was giving Sunghoon made him clench his fists. 

Your return to the table had Sunghoon relaxing, and Taehyun returning to work. 

Sunghoon couldn’t take his eyes off you. He felt so at home in your presence. His mind telling him to tell you the truth, that you deserved to know. But the moment you locked eyes with him and the corners of your lips curled into that precious smile, he couldn’t do it. 

“What’s up?” you asked, “You’re deep in thought?” 

“Ahh…” Sunghoon tried to collect his thoughts, then quickly smiled, settling on the topic change, “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow?” you thought about it, “I just have class, why?” 

“Come to my hockey practice tomorrow night.” 

That invite took you by surprise, “Huh?” 

Sunghoon smiled even more, leaning forward on the table, “Come watch my practice tomorrow. Please?”

You tried to find an excuse to get out of it, but nothing came to mind. How could you just show up to your best friend’s ex-boyfriend’s hockey practice?

“The guys would love to see you, I bet.” Sunghoon mentioning his friends only hit you in the heart harder, “Come on, YN, just like old times.” 

Without a second thought, you agreed. Not knowing exactly why, but feeling as if it would be okay. It was just hockey practice. 

He jumped up from the table, “I have to get to figure skating practice, is your phone number still the same?”

You nodded, heart beating faster at hearing he still had your phone number. 

With a jump away from the table and a small skip, he said, “I’ll text you the details!” 

—

Sunghoon twirled his hockey stick in hand, eyes darting to each entrance of the stadium.

Heeseung skated past, quickly stopping in front of him, eyes also following each entrance, “Brother, what are you looking at?”

Sunghoon snaps his attention at Heeseung, his mouth open to speak, but no words coming out. 

“He’s waiting for YN,” Jay says as he also skates past, skating a circle around them. 

Sunghoon rolled his eyes, “Dude.” 

Jay smirked, “Should’ve kept your mouth shut.” 

“Clearly, that’s the last time I tell you anything,” Sunghoon said, sliding his helmet over his head. 

Heeseung raised a brow, “Wait you’re speaking to YN again?” 

Sunghoon just nodded, “Yeah. We umm, ran into each other at a coffee shop.” 

“Yeah, “ran into each other”, we’ll call it that.” Jay teased, leaning forward on his hockey stick. 

“Shut the fuck up or I’ll kick your stick from you and laugh when you hit the ice,” Sunghoon said with a snarky smile. 

“Woah now!” Jay said, holding his hand up, “You’re a figure skater now, can’t be talking like that anymore.” 

Sunghoon skated forward, Jay also scooted backward sticking his tongue out. 

Heeseung seemed to be the only one who was concerned, “How did the three of you make up?” 

Sunghoon awkwardly chuckled, “You mean the two of us…”

Heeseung looked at his friend confused, “You and—“

“No,” Sunghoon quickly shook his head, “We aren’t talking.” 

Heeseung just nodded, finally putting the pieces together, “Sorry for assuming that you rekindled with both of them.” 

Sunghoon swung his hockey stick around again, “Just YN. And from what I’ve noticed, the two of them aren’t really friends anymore.”

It didn’t take long for Sunghoon to figure it out. The way it used to be, his ex would always talk about you, and you would always talk about his ex. The two of you were inseparable. A package deal. With one you got the other. And the fact that you haven’t once brought her up over the last week that he’s started talking to you again, it didn’t take a genius to figure out that she also pushed you away after the breakup. 

Heeseung just nodded, “Do you blame them?” Sunghoon just looked at him, not knowing what to say, “YN doesn’t know, does she?” 

Sunghoon shook his head, “No, and she won’t.” 

“Hoon-“

“I am not ready to tell her,” Sunghoon snapped, “I finally got one of my closest friends back, I don’t want to cross that bridge.” 

Heeseung sighed and nodded, “Okay man, just don’t get butt hurt when it backfires at you.” 

Sunghoon knew this secret could backfire on him, he wasn’t stupid. But it was worth the risk. 

“I’m going to see if she texted me,” he said, “Just in case she said he couldn’t make it.” 

Heeseung watched as Sunghoon skated off towards his gym bag. 

Dropping his gloves to the ice and carefully stepping off the ice, he sat down on the bench, opened his gym bag, and pulled out his phone, quickly finding your messages and seeing you’ve read his last text. 

Sunghoon felt stupid getting his hopes up. What did he think inviting you would do? 

I just wanted her back in my life again. 

He tossed his phone back in the bag and stepped back onto the ice, pulling his gloves back onto his hands. 

I’m so fucking pathetic. 

Sunghoon adjusted his gloves, now waiting for practice to start. 

Jay whistled at him, causing a glare to shoot from his eyes.

Jay tilted his head up, “Look.” 

Sunghoon turned back around, seeing you walking in, your arms wrapped tightly around you. 

He couldn’t stop the smile that formed on his face, immediately skating in your direction. 

“You made it!” he said, sliding his helmet from his head. 

You smiled back, nodding, “Sorry that I am a bit late, my class got out later.” 

You walked up to the wall Sunghoon was now leaning against, his helmet resting on top of it. 

“You showed up, and that’s all that matters,” Sunghoon couldn’t hide how happy it made him that you were here right now. 

You nodded again, smiling wide back at him, “It’s cold as balls in here though!” 

Sunghoon pointed over to his gym bag, “I have my hockey varsity jacket in my bag, wear it if you get too cold.” 

“I am definitely going to wear it,” you shivered, “I forgot how cold it gets in here.” 

The memory of the last time he saw you replayed in his mind, it was during a hockey game. His team was a couple of points away from winning. Sunghoon and his ex were too busy fighting off on the side of the bleachers, her stomping away not wanting to finish the conversation. His eyes wandered over to you, the sad look you gave him broke his heart even more. Your heart was also breaking due to watching your closest friends tear each other apart. All Sunghoon could do was shove his hands into his hoodie pocket and walk out of the stadium. 

He watched as you walked over to his things, your hands immediately reaching for the jacket and sliding it onto your body. 

Oh fuck I am a goner. 

Sunghoon loved the way you looked in his jacket. The way it loosely hangs against your body. How cute it made you look. His heart dropped onto the ice. 

Your body started warming up a bit more, sliding your hands into his jacket pockets. Your eyes traced the other players on the ice. Jay and Heeseung waving at you. You waved back. Gosh, you couldn’t remember the last time you saw either of them. 

You’ve seen them out and about around the college, but not so personally like this. It’s been way too long. 

Sunghoon skated back over to his friends and teammates. 

“It’s weird seeing her again,” Jay said, watching you sit down, eyes wandering around the stadium, “Mostly seeing her without her twin at her hip. She looks really good though,” 

Jay was lucky Sunghoon was in a better mood than earlier, or else he’d be wiping the ice with Jay’s face, “Can we not talk about my ex, please, and she does look good. Eyes off.” 

Jay wanted to make a smart remark, but with a quick look at Sunghoon and then you, he decided to leave the teasing off the ice, giving him a nod, “Yeah, sorry man.” 

Their coach finally started practice. 

It went by in a flash. You waited outside the stadium for Sunghoon, his jacket still wrapped around your body. 

“Well, what did you think of our practice?” Sunghoon said, sneaking up on you, and giving you a little jolt. 

“It was very interesting, you played well.” 

Sunghoon walked closer to you, his hands reaching up to fix the collar of his jacket, his cold fingers brushing against your skin, “My jacket looks really good on you.” 

Your heart sank. 

Is he…flirting???

“Oh, shoot!” you tried to play it off as if you forgot, wanting to find an excuse for the blush on your face to go away after his comment, reaching to take the jacket off, “Here, I forgot I was still wearing it.” 

Sunghoon grabbed your hands and shoved them back at your side, “YN, keep it.” 

“But—“ 

Sunghoon interrupted, “It’s okay! I promise! Just keep it for now, okay? I have another jacket I can wear.” 

You nodded, feeling your body getting hot from his hands still touching yours. 

Why are you getting so bothered??? You’ve known him for years. Why is every little thing he’s doing affecting you???

“Anyways,” he said, finally letting go of your hands, “We have a game this weekend, you’ll come right?” 

You wouldn’t mind going, it could be an excuse to get you out of your apartment for once and not just sit at the coffee shop either. 

“Yeah, I’ll come.”

Sunghoon smiled, his eyes darting to the ground to try and hide just how big he was smiling, “I’ll save you a ticket.” 

—

You walked into the shop, giving Taehyun a smile and wave. Giving you the normal thumbs up. 

You dropped your backpack to the floor at your normal table and slumped down into the seat with a sigh. 

“Rough day?” Sunghoon asked, his yellow highlighter moving across his textbook. 

You nodded, “I forgot to set my alarms last night, so I woke up late and got to class late. On top of that I had to take double the notes because…” you stopped yourself, not wanting to bring your best friend's name into the mix. 

Sunghoon stopped highlighting, he didn’t even have to hear her name to know what you were going to say, his eyes slowly rising to meet yours, “You’re still taking notes for her?” 

You just shrugged, “Maybe…” 

“YN,” he dropped his highlighter into the textbook, “You need to stop doing that.”

You didn’t know how to respond. Mostly because you knew he was right. She was just using you at this point. 

Taehyun interrupted your thoughts by setting your coffee down in front of you, “Tae! I could have gotten it from you.” 

His cute sharky smile came out, “Don’t worry about it, I don’t ever get to bring the coffee to you. Plus I needed to get away from behind the counter.” 

You smiled up at him, “Thank you.” 

Taehyun rested his hand on your shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze, “It’s no problem at all, YN.” 

Sunghoon clenched his fists under the table, eyes burning holes into his hand that was touching you. 

As Taehyun walked away, he locked eyes with Sunghoon as if to say “Your move now, buddy.” 

Oh, I’ll play your game, Taehyun. 

“He totally has a crush on you.” Sunghoon spat out. 

You softly giggled, “Who? Tae? No,” you giggled again, taking a sip of your coffee, “He’s just a good friend.” 

Sunghoon rubbed his tongue against the inside of his cheek, eyes darting back to Taehyun who was now back behind the counter, “I can see it in the way he looks at you.” 

You rolled your eyes. He sounds jealous. 

You glanced up at him, seeing how he kept his eyes on Taehyun. 

Oh, he’s…actually jealous??? No. It couldn’t be. He’s still in love with his ex.

You shook the thoughts from your head, deciding to change the subject, “Are you ready for the game tomorrow?” 

Sunghoon’s eyes made their way back to you, his face relaxing and a small smile formed, “Yes, you’re still coming…right?” 

You nodded, “I wouldn’t miss it,” you took another sip of your coffee, “Wasn’t able to see you play back then, so I’m excited to see you play now.” 

Hearing you say that warmed his heart. Knowing you’ll be in the crowd cheering for him and only him. He had to make sure he was on his ‘a game’ tomorrow. 

“Make sure to wear my jacket tomorrow,” Sunghoon gave you a wink, picking his highlighter back up and continuing where he left off. 

You giggled, “Why? What will your jacket do? Bring good luck?” 

Sunghoon chuckled, stretching the highlighter across the words on the textbook, “It has an S.H. and my last name on the back,” he glanced back up at you, “And you know, yeah, you wearing my jacket will bring good luck. You’ll be my good luck charm.” 

Sunghoon took notice of the slight blush on your cheeks, his smile growing more as he looked back to his textbook. 

God, she’s so cute. 

You tried to slow your heart rate. Why is he making you feel like this? 

“It’s getting kinda late,” Sunghoon’s voice pulls you from your thoughts, “Are you hungry? Want to grab a bite to eat? Then I can walk you to your apartment?”

You nodded. 

You weren’t sure what these butterflies in your stomach meant, but it made you feel guilty for even having them. 

—

It was game day and your nerves were all tied together in a knot. 

You took one last look at your outfit in your mirror, fingers twisting in the belt loops of your ripped skinny jeans, pulling them up further above your hips. 

Your college’s hockey team t-shirt had a small hole at the bottom of the shirt, which was to be expected. This was an old shirt and you haven’t worn it since the last game you attended…the night Sunghoon pushed you out of his life. 

Your black high-top vans looked like they’ve seen better days, but looked good with the outfit. 

Grabbing a hair tie from your vanity, you pulled your long hair back, wrapping the tie around it, just to pull it out right after.  

You tried different hairstyles, not liking a single one. 

Why do I even care how my hair looks? 

You settled for a ponytail, deciding it’s what matched the outfit better. 

The last final piece was Sunghoon’s jacket, pulling it over your shoulders. You turned around in the mirror, glancing back to see his initials on the back. 

“You’ll be my good luck charm.” 

You caught yourself smiling at the memory, bringing the hems of the jacket up to your nose, breathing in the smell. 

It still smelt like him, even after you’ve had it for the last couple of days. The familiar smell of blackberry and floral filled your senses. 

His scent brought you comfort, the knot of nerves unraveling and disappearing. 

While the nerves found their way out, other feelings crept their way in. 

Your heart raced faster, thinking about the smile on Sunghoon’s face he’d have when he saw you. 

The more thoughts of him that flooded your brain, the more guilty you felt. 

He’s your best friend’s ex…you can’t be thinking about and getting so giddy over him. 

You slapped your hands to your face, hoping it would be enough to kick those feelings out. 

Unfortunately, they didn’t. 

You sat down at your vanity, pulling open one of the drawers, revealing a photo booth picture strip of yourself, Sunghoon, and your best friend. 

You held the fragile paper in your hands, staring at each set of photos one by one. Eyes locking onto Sunghoon. 

You didn’t feel this way about him back then, so why now all of a sudden does he have your stomach tied in knots? 

His smile in the photos sent your heart racing. The way he was looking at your best friend, you couldn’t help but wish he looked at you like that. 

You quickly shoved the photo strip back into the drawer, slamming it shut. 

You stood from the chair, grabbed your phone and keys, and walked out of your room. 

By the time you showed up at the stadium, the opposing team and Sunghoon’s team lined up on each side of the rink doing their warmups. 

Your eyes searched for him, seeing the number 23 skating by quickly, him swinging the hockey stick, sending the puck flying into the goal. 

Even though it was just a practice shot, you clapped anyway. 

Sunghoon skated back into line, eyes wandering the crowd until he found you. Your smile sends butterflies in his stomach fluttering about. 

God, you look so good right now. The way your hair was pulled back, the way your thighs peeked out from the rips of your jeans, and how perfect his jacket looked on you. 

Sunghoon never let his ex wear that jacket, it was so special to him, so much that only he wanted to wear it. But it was so different with you. 

He gave you a wave, letting you know that he does indeed, know you’re here. 

The game finally started, and the butterflies did not calm down one bit. He had to do well in this game. He couldn’t disappoint you. 

Heeseung patted his back, “Calm down buddy, you’re our best player. Can’t have you tapping out on us.” 

Jay agreed, “This isn’t even the first game of the season, what’s got you so worked up all of a sudden?” 

“YN is here,” Niki, one of the only freshmen on the team, teased. 

Sunghoon shot the younger one a glare, “Brother, you don’t want to tease me right now.” 

Niki smirked, “Man, I know enough about your life and I barely have been on the team.” 

Jay slapped Sunghoon’s shoulder, “Just ignore the kid, he’s just a little silly.” 

Niki agreed, “Just a little bit.” 

Sunghoon waved his teammates off, “I am fine, my nerves have nothing to do with YN being here.” 

His friends looked at him with telling faces, they knew he was lying. Knew he was full of shit. But deciding to let it go. 

The game went on, each of the teams scoring left and right. 

You sat on the edge of your seat, hands clasped together at your chest. There were five minutes left on the clock, your team was only a point ahead. 

Your eyes followed Sunghoon on the ice, you could tell by his body language he was stressed. The way he stretched his arms out over his hockey stick behind his neck was enough to tell how absent-minded he was in this moment, the only thing he could focus on was getting one last point. Swinging his stick back down onto the ice, slightly bending over, ready for anything. 

Jay passed the puck to Niki, pushing the puck across the rink, Sunghoon positioned himself, screaming for Niki to pass the puck towards him.  

Niki passed it quickly to him. Sunghoon grabbed the puck, pushing his feet and legs as quickly as he could against the ice, the only thing on his mind was to keep the puck against the stick.

As he neared the goal, the goalie prepared himself for Sunghoon to make a shot. 

Sweat dripped down the side of his face, hands gripping tighter on the stick as he lifted it from the ice and puck. 

You stood to your feet, hands hovering over your chest, gripping at the fabric of your shirt. 

Sunghoon swung the stick using all the force possible and hit the puck, watching as the black disc flew across the ice. 

The world seemed to go in slow motion for Sunghoon, his eyes wide as the anticipation of waiting for the puck to reach the goalie, it sliding gracefully between the goalie's legs, the guy barely missing to stop it. 

Sunghoon pivoted, stopping his motion on the ice. His eyes locked onto the puck, confirming it hit the net. 

He turned his body towards his teammates, the world around him going back to normal speed. The crowd cheered, and his teammates surrounded him, slapping their hands against his chest, shoulders, and back. The clock hit its final second, the buzzer sounding. The game was over. We won. 

We won..!!

Sunghoon started screaming and cheering with his teammates, hands slapping them as they continued to slap him. 

You rushed down to the wall, the upper half of your body leaning over it, cupping your hands to your mouth, “Sunghoon!!!” 

He didn’t hear you over the screams of his mates and fans. But it felt as if he knew you were waiting for him. 

His eyes found you and started pushing past his teammates, sliding his helmet off and handing it and his stick off to Heeseung. 

Using what was left of his leg strength, he pushed himself towards you quickly. 

He stretched his arms up in the air, shouting, “WE DID IT!!” 

You couldn’t stop your smile from falling, not when Sunghoon looked as happy as he did at that moment. His fangs were on full display from how wide he was smiling. 

His body crashed against the wall, his gloved hands wrapping around your waist, connecting his torso to yours. 

His wet sweaty hair tickled your cheek as he pulled you into a hug. The first hug you’ve received from him since…well the breakup. 

You patted his back, leaning your head against his, “You played so well! I am so proud of you!” 

You’ve never gotten to tell him how exactly proud of him you were. For all the years you’ve known him, he’s always given his one hundred percent, but because of the past circumstances, you weren’t able to voice how proud you were of him, your best friend wouldn’t have allowed it. 

Hearing you tell him how well he did was enough to risk everything. It did something so deep to his heart that he couldn’t hide it anymore. 

It’s now or never Park Sunghoon, just do it. 

“I told you. I told you that you were my good luck charm,” he whispered in your ear, brushing his cheek against yours as he moved his head up. Brushing his nose against yours softly before moving in, pressing his lips against yours quickly. 

So fast that you didn’t have time to process it as his hands left your waist and he was skating backward away from you. He bit his bottom lip as his eyes stayed locked with yours. 

Your fingertips touched your lips, your ears blocking out all sound as the rest of your senses focused on the man in front of you. 

He kissed you…Oh my god, he kissed you!!! 

Sunghoon gave you a wink and said “Meet me by my car!” then turned back around, skating to his teammates, all of them huddling together. 

—

He pressed you up against his front door, using your body to completely shut it, his fingers flipping the lock as his tongue invaded your mouth, your brain going fuzzy. 

You met him at his car after the game and convinced you to have dinner with him and the team. 

You sat beside him in the booth at this fancy diner, his arm was wrapped around your shoulder, his fingers softly rubbing against your arm. Once the food arrived at the table, his arm went from being behind you to his hand resting on your thigh, his fingers sliding between the rips of your jeans, squeezing the plush skin. 

His touch was driving you crazy, and with your new emotions towards him, it made his contact with your skin make you hot and bothered. 

Sunghoon couldn’t keep his hands off you, and you liked it. Liked the attention he was giving you. 

Liked it so much that you didn’t even think twice when he drove right past the street of your apartment building and pulled into his apartment building. 

He held both your hands tightly, his smile so bright as he guided you up the stairs to his apartment. Soft laughs leaving his lips at just the thought of being with you. 

He was dying to kiss you again. Like properly kiss you. 

He wanted to kiss you so bad that the moment you were inside his apartment, his hands and body were pressed against yours, using his weight to push you against his door. Lips connecting to yours as if he were running out of oxygen and your lips were the sole source of air. 

His hands moved from your hips, sliding up your torso, fingers grazing against your breasts and up to your neck, hands cupping your jaw. 

You kissed him back forcefully, pushing your tongue between his lips, rubbing the muscle against his own, mixing your saliva. 

You tasted so sweet to him. He couldn’t get enough. 

Sunghoon went to pull away, wanting to attach his lips to your neck, but you weren’t ready for his lips to leave yours. 

You caught his bottom lip between your teeth, biting a bit harder than you expected. 

Sunghoon hissed out in pleasure, rolling his hips against yours, his clothed hard length pressing at your heat. 

You released his lip, his hands taking yours and lifting them above your head, pinning you against the door, his lips attaching themself to your neck, “Keep acting up baby and I just might have to punish you.” 

His words sent chills down your spine as he left open mouth kisses on your neck. Your imagination running wild at what these punishments would be, but being too afraid to test his limits. 

Sunghoon loved hearing the soft moans escaping your pretty little mouth. It was music to his ears. 

He placed his leg right between yours, using it to spread them further apart, giving him more access to press his cock against you. 

You were shaking, wanting to completely feel him against you, skin to skin. 

“Hoonie,” you whispered in his ear, “Please,” 

Sunghoon reached down, cupping the back of your thighs and lifting you up, wrapping your legs around him. His hands sliding to cup your ass, lips finding yours again. 

“Say less princess,” he mumbled against your lips as he carried you to his bedroom. 

He laid you down gently on his bed, his right hand stayed on your thigh, squeezing it tightly to keep it wrapped around him as his left hand flew to his shirt, fingers working their magic at the buttons. 

You became impatient, sending your hands to help undress him. 

You slid the fabric off his shoulders and down his arms, your fingers feeling every muscle as they traced down his skin and off his body. 

Your eyes took a moment to appreciate his body. You already knew he worked out, but good lord was his toned, buff body beautiful. 

Sunghoon kissed you again, his hands sliding his jacket off your body then finding their way under your shirt and up and over your head. 

He worked with the button of your jeans as you worked with his. 

He slid his jeans and underwear down together, leaving him completely bare to you.

His fingers looped between your jeans and panties, lifting your hips up as he pulled them off your body. 

“Fuck, YN,” he moaned out, hands snaking underneath you to unclasp your bra, your breasts falling to their natural place once the material was on the floor. His eyes looked your bare body up and down, before laying his body on top of yours, “You’re so beautiful.” 

Your fingers tangled in his hair when he kissed you again, your tongues dancing together in perfect rhythm, his hand sliding down your body and stopping at your thigh to pull it back over his waist. 

Sunghoon was completely turned on just by the skin-to-skin contact, by just feeling your pretty legs wrapped around him. 

He rolled his hips, rubbing his dick against your clit, his hand fumbling at his nightstand drawer for his box of condoms. 

You woke up that next morning with the sun shining through his bedroom window. 

Sunghoon had his head on your chest still fast asleep. 

His arm was wrapped around your waist, the bedsheets were tangled up between yours and his legs. His leg hung out from the sheets and they hung at his hips, his bare back exposed. 

Your heart raced at the site in front of you. 

Did this actually happen?? I am not dreaming?

Your hand touched his bicep, fingers softly moving up and down his arm. 

Sunghoon moved his head up, tucking it in your neck, arm tightening around you. He was still fast asleep. 

Guilt washed over you once again. You just had sex with your best friend's ex-boyfriend. She would kill you both if she knew what happened last night. 

Did you regret it? Absolutely not. The sex was perfect. Sunghoon is perfect. But that still didn’t stop the thoughts that it shouldn’t have happened. 

Would you do it again? Regardless of these thoughts? Also yes. 

Your relationship with Sunghoon was different now. You had deep feelings for him. And the fact that he kept inviting you over, inviting you to his practices and games, asking to see you after classes, and randomly showing up at your front door, proved enough to you that it wasn’t about the sex that night, that his feelings also ran deep for you too. 

Your coffee shop days were more intimate, instead of sitting across from each other, you’d sit beside each other. Hands locking together as you’d drink your coffees. 

He would be waiting outside your apartment door every single morning to drive you to class. 

You would cheer him on from the bleachers at every practice, and have dinner with him afterwards. 

The sex got more intense the more comfortable you both got. You saw a whole new side of Sunghoon in the bedroom. A side you never thought you’d ever see or even thought about seeing until recently. 

He explored every inch of your body, his fingers pumping in and out of your pussy. Shoving his fingers in your mouth as he pounded into you from behind. Bruises were left on your hips from how his fingers would grip your skin. 

You got more bold too. From being his little submissive princess to a dominant queen. The way you’d jerk your hand up and down his cock sending his head flying back, body shaking from your touch as you straddled him. 

Sunghoon became a part of your daily life, just like he was all that time ago. 

You showed up to every game wearing his jacket, being that good luck charm you knew you were to him. Everything felt right.

—

Sunghoon wrapped his arms around you, pulling you down onto your couch with him, “Babe, cuddle me! I am touch starved!” 

You rolled your eyes at him, trying to wiggle your way out of his grip, “We just had sex, yet you’re still touch-starved?” 

“Obviously!” he nuzzled his face at the nape of your neck, hands gripping the hem of your shirt, “Let’s have sex again.” 

“Hoonie,” you giggled at the feeling of his lips kissing your neck, “You have practice in thirty minutes, you need to get ready soon.” 

Sunghoon groaned against your neck, but he knew you were right. 

Sunghoon went to propose skipping practice tonight but got distracted by your phone ringing, eyes darting over to it, being the nosey guy that he is, and seeing…his ex’s name on the caller ID. 

His smile faded, why would she be calling you?

You sighed at seeing your best friend's name on your phone, finger-hitting the decline. 

Calling her your best friend seemed pointless now. Right before things kicked off between you and Sunghoon, she found another boy toy to mess around with, completely ignoring you. You’ve also tried many times to hang out with her, to go by and see her at her job, to invite her over to do homework, to try and just hang with her when Sunghoon was busy, yet all she did was ignore you. So the fact she’s hitting you up now only means she needs something from you. And to say you were exhausted from it would be an understatement. 

Maybe it was karma for keeping your relationship with Sunghoon a secret from her. But you also knew you couldn’t tell her. At least not right now. 

You felt bad declining the call, deciding to shoot her a quick text saying you were busy in the shower and couldn’t answer the call just for her to reply saying it was fine, but was wanting the notes from class today and then sent a smiley face :) 

Sunghoon shook his head, “Please don’t.” 

You set your phone down, not responding to her, “Don’t what?” you knew the answer, but tried to play dumb anyways. 

“YN, stop playing this game with her, she’s using you.” 

You knew it was true, but hearing it come from his mouth didn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less. 

Sunghoon bit his lips in a way to keep himself calm. He hated that she was doing this to you. He saw firsthand how badly the breakup affected you too. You lost both of your best friends because of it. But the shitty part was you weren’t supposed to lose her, but you did anyway. She was supposed to stay by your side but didn’t. 

She abandoned you. Even after she promised him she wouldn’t. 

The secrets he wishes he could tell you in hopes of you cutting her off for good, but he couldn’t break that trust with her, even if she deserved it. 

The only thing he could do was try and convince you in other ways. 

“Baby,” he whispered, “Look at me.” 

You did, shifting yourself in his lap to face him. 

He tucked your hair behind your ears, “You deserve better than that. I know you love and care for her, and that she’s your best friend, but this friendship is toxic. All it is doing is hurting you.” 

You looked away from his chocolate eyes and to the floor, “I know.” 

Sunghoon pulled your chin between his fingers, forcing you to look back at him, “I don’t want you to hurt anymore, not just because of her, but because of me too. We both did some damage to you and I have to live with that. I am so fucking lucky you let me come back in your life. And well, I am not saying to completely cut her out of your life,” even though that is what he’s wanting, “but don’t do things like this for her anymore.” 

You nodded. He was right. The only reason you kept doing things for her no matter what they were was to keep her in your life. You kept holding onto a rope that was torn a long time ago. 

“Promise me,” he asked, holding up his pinky finger, “Please.” 

You wrapped your pinky tightly with his, sealing the promise. 

—

It was the final game of the season, if the boys win this game they move on to the championship. 

Sunghoon stood with you by the wall, his hands trembling in his gloves. 

He was nervous, scared even, it was written all over his face. 

“Sunghoon,” you saying his name always sounded so beautiful to his ears. He looks over to you, giving a nervous smile, “It’ll be okay. You’re one of the best damn players on this team. The championship is calling your team's name!” 

You could only hope your words were reaching him, helping make him feel better. 

Which it did. His hand stopped trembling just from your smile. You were his good luck charm after all. 

He slid his hand from his glove, cupping the side of your face, “I am the luckiest man alive to have you.” 

You leaned into his hand, his thumb rubbing against your skin. 

His couch blew the whistle for warm-ups to start. 

“Gimme a good luck kiss princess,” he said pulling you closer to him, “It’ll give me strength.” 

You giggled against his lips and pouted as he skated away, giving him a thumbs up. 

Little did you know, your “best friend” was sitting in the bleachers, watching the entire thing. 

The game went in a flash, Sunghoon once again scoring the winning goal. 

You jumped from your seat and pressed against the wall, arms stretched out and waiting for Sunghoon to embrace himself into you, his lips crashing against yours in celebration of his win. 

You stood at the end of the bleachers, eyes staring off down the hallway that led to the locker rooms, heart racing at wanting to see Sunghoon again, to be able to give him a proper hug for his win. 

“OMG! You came to the game too?!” 

Your heart sank at her voice, your friend connecting her shoulder to yours as she stood beside you. 

Your body tensed, “Y-Yeah, it was their last game so I came to support them.” 

“Hmmm,” she hummed, her hands flying to Sunghoon’s jacket, “Isn’t this Hoon’s?” She forced you around, seeing his name printed on the back. 

She knows she’s got to know.

She hummed again, “Why do you have his jacket, YN?” 

You shrugged, leaning back against the bleacher, “I was cold and he offered it to me I guess.” 

She crossed her arms, “He never let me borrow it, weird.” 

“I was freezing,” you tried to play it off, “You know how cold I can get sometimes.” 

She nodded, “That’s true,” her eyes darted down the hallway, “Since when did you and Hoon start hanging out again?” 

She definitely knows. 

You knew it was a matter of time before she found out, but you didn’t think it would be like this. 

You opened your mouth to speak, only for her face to light up with excitement and her hands clapping. 

The boys finally were leaving the locker room, “Here come our winners!” she said. 

Sunghoon was with Jay, the two of them doing their handshake and walking in separate directions, Sunghoon’s smile fading after looking in your direction. 

“OH EM GEE!!!” she squealed, grabbing your hand and rushing you both to meet Sunghoon halfway, “You are such a star Hoonie!” 

She wrapped her arms around Sunghoon’s neck, but he was quick to pull her off of him, “What are you doing here?” 

You were surprised how calm he was. 

“Am I not allowed to come and support you?” she asked, raising her eyebrows. 

“You lost that right when we broke up.” he scoffed, “Why are you actually here?” 

She pouted, pulling you to her side, “I missed you guys, wanted us to rekindle and be a trio again.” 

Sunghoon could smell the bullshit radiating out of her mouth. 

Does this bitch think I am stupid?

“Rekindle?” he chuckled, “Rekindle what? Exactly?” oh he was pissed now, “Explain yourself. Now.” 

She let go of your arm, taking a step closer to him, “I miss you, Hoon.” She reached to touch his face, but he caught her arm with his hand, shoving it away from him. 

“Don’t touch me.” 

You didn’t know what to do or what to say, this fight didn’t involve you, it was something they had to settle. 

“Hoon,” she begged, “I want you back, please.” 

Sunghoon took a step back away from her, “Cut the bullshit.” 

She rolled her eyes, “What bullshit?!”

“I am in a relationship,” he spat out, “I am happy.” 

A laugh escaped her mouth, a laugh you’ve never heard her do before, “I know, I am not stupid,” she took a step back, wrapping her arms around you, “You’re fucking our sweet YN.” 

Sunghoon’s grip on his duffle bag tightened and his jaw locked. What the fuck was she trying to pull here?

She smiled, knowing she got you both where she wanted you to be, “The fact that you’re both quiet speaks volumes, lemme tell ya.” 

“What the fuck do you want?” he said through his locked jaw. 

“I want to know why,” she pulled a piece of your hair behind your ear, “I want to know why you both betrayed me like this. Why my ex-boyfriend decided it was okay to fuck my best friend, and why my best friend decided it was okay to fuck my ex.” 

Oh, she’s going there? Game on.

Sunghoon chuckled, “Best friend? Best friends don't abandon each other!”

“That’s rich coming from you,” she retorted.

“You abandoned her!!” he snapped. 

“So did you!!” she snapped back, “You walked away just as much as I did!” 

“I walked away because I cared about you! I cared about your feelings! You promised you’d stay by her side, not leave her to fight alone and use her for your own personal gain, that’s not a friendship!” 

“Oh, here we go,” she laughed, “It’s always about YN.” 

You wanted to speak up, to ask them what that meant, but before you could, Sunghoon was reaching for you. 

He’s heard enough. He’s HAD enough. He couldn’t let this conversation continue, not when she might spill everything. 

He pulled you to his side, pushing you in the direction towards the exit door, “YN, baby, let’s go.” 

“How long did you think you could hide? Hmm?” 

Both you and Sunghoon stopped walking. 

“I’ve known for a while now,” you turned and faced her, waiting for her to finish, “You think I wouldn’t notice? Wouldn't notice either of your cars at each other's apartments?” 

Sunghoon laughed, “So you’re stalking us now? That’s so fucking low.” 

“How could I not? Not after I saw the two of you leaving that diner downtown a while ago,” 

She’s known since the beginning.

“I thought maybe, at first, you two were just hanging out again. I minded my business. But then I thought, hmm, I should surprise visit YN. And I bet you could imagine my surprise when I pulled up to her apartment and saw your car parked there and her riding your dick on her couch.” your face flushed, embarrassed, “Maybe next time make sure your blinds are closed before fucking in the living room.” 

Sunghoon sighed, pulling you closer to him. He felt like shit because of all this happening to you. 

“This doesn’t excuse your shitty stalking behavior,” Sunghoon said. 

She shrugged, “I only caught you by coincidence at first, the second time surprised me too. The rest I had to ask around campus to find out.” 

Sunghoon was getting more pissed by the second, “YN doesn’t deserve this!!” 

“You’re so right!” she clapped her hands, “She does deserve better friends, I know. We were so shitty to her. But you know what she also deserves? The truth.” 

The…truth?

Sunghoon shook his head, “No, let’s go,” he tried pushing you toward the exit again, he wasn’t ready for you to hear what she was about to say. 

You forced Sunghoon off you, taking a few steps back towards her, “What truth do I deserve to know?” 

Mostly since Sunghoon seemed so set on me leaving just now. 

Your friend smirked, “The truth about the reason why we broke up in the first place.” 

Sunghoon snapped her name, “Keep your fucking mouth shut!” 

You look back at him, “What is so goddamn secretive?” 

Sunghoon sighed, his eyes dropping to the floor. 

You looked back at her, “Well??” 

“The reason we broke up was because of you.” she crossed her arms over her chest, eyes darting at Sunghoon. 

“Because of me?” You couldn’t wrap your head around why, “W-what did I do?” 

“You didn’t do anything, YN,” Sunghoon finally said. 

“Then…why…” 

“Because he’s in love with you,” you stood there frozen, “He confessed to me a few months before we broke up on how deeply in love with you he was.” she said snarky, “That he caught feelings for you early on into our relationship, but kept it hidden all those years until he couldn’t. The guilt ate him up. Plus I caught him practically eye fucking you at one of the last parties we all attended together.” 

You looked back at Sunghoon, his eyes glossed over. He’s been in love with you the entire time you’ve known him? 

“It’s truly sad, isn’t it?” your friend continued, “The night we fought, was me making him promise to never come near you again. Guess it worked for a while.” 

“Why would you promise that!” You yelled at him, “Why would you even agree to that?!” 

“Because I still cared about her!” Sunghoon shook his head, “I wanted to respect her wishes, I wanted to respect you! You had no feelings towards me whatsoever, and after the last couple shitty months of my relationship with her, I wanted you to heal and find peace with losing me, had I known she would also walk away from you, I would have never let you go.” 

“Why did you stay with her as long as you did if you wanted me?” It was a shitty question to ask, but you had to know. 

“Because I was already a shitty person for falling in love with my girlfriend’s best friend. I didn’t want to hurt either of you. So I kept my feelings hidden until they eventually overflowed to the point I couldn’t contain it.” 

With tears in your eyes, you stomped over to him, fists hitting his chest, “Why would you leave me then?! I needed you!” you cried it all out, releasing the frustration, and he just took it, “Do you know how lonely I was when you left? How terrible I felt watching you walk away that night? I lost part of my soul.” 

Sunghoon pulled you to him, “Baby I know and I am so fucking sorry I did that to you.” 

You cried into his chest, fingers gripping his shirt. Too many emotions were fighting you at all once. You were the sole reason your best friends broke up, how could you not feel like shit?

You pushed yourself off him, turning back towards your friend, “What is your excuse for leaving me?” 

Her facial expression tightened, “How could I have stayed? Every time I looked at you all I could remember was the fact that my boyfriend wanted you, not me.” 

Fair enough. But that was also such a shotty excuse. 

“Guess our friendship didn’t mean shit to you,” you scoffed, “A boy meant more to you than I did. Meant more than our lifetime of friendship.” 

She had nothing to say to that, just thinned her lips in a line, looking away. 

“I’ve heard enough,” you softly said, “Take me home, please Sunghoon.” 

He nodded, extending out his hand for you to take it, and you did. The two of you walking away.

“Enjoy my seconds, YN.” 

Oh, she did not.

Sunghoon beat you to running his mouth, “At least YN pleases me. You should see the mess she makes of me since you want to stalk us so bad.” 

You bit the insides of your cheeks to keep from laughing, was their sex life that bad?

Her face turned red you could practically see the smoke coming out of her ears, “Go to hell Sunghoon! It’s where you belong!” 

He chuckled, “Gladly, I’d give up every piece of heaven for YN.” 

She rolled her eyes, it was always about you. It’s always been you for him. 

“Oh and by the way,” Sunghoon added, “I know you cheated on me multiple times with Mark from calculus, way before I confessed my feelings for YN. So us breaking up wasn’t just because of her. Suck a dick.” 

Sunghoon wrapped an arm around you, a smirk on his face as you both listened to her yelling more nonsense. 

—

He drove you home and walked you into your apartment. 

“I really am sorry, YN.” Sunghoon wrapped you into his arms, “I never wanted to hurt you.” 

You cupped his face, thumbs wiping the tears that fell, “Don’t ever apologize, okay? You were caught in a situation.” 

“It’s no excuse,” he took your hands in his, “I love you, I always have. I shouldn’t have walked away.” 

You just nodded, standing on your tippy toes to place a kiss on his nose, “I love you, Park Sunghoon. You’re with me now, and that’s all that matters.”

It was true. He was so lucky to have you. To finally have you after waiting for you for so long. 

Thank god he decided to try that coffee shop out. 

“Was sex with her really that bad?” you asked, a giggle escaping. 

He laughed too, “Yeah, never came once.” 

“I guess that means I win in that department too since I make such a mess outta you,” 

Sunghoon bit his lip, sliding his hands to squeeze your waist, “Keep talking like that and I’ll ruin you.” 

You pressed a quick kiss to his lips then escaped his arms, running towards your bedroom, “Can’t ruin me if I make a mess of you first.” 

Sunghoon chased after you, his heart pounding at the happiness on your face. 

God, he really was the luckiest man alive.

[steddiecameraroll]

ao3

What if Steve’s the one painfully pining thinking Eddie is straight.

Eddie unaware but happy he and Steve became friends after everything.

Eddie oblivious to how Steve’s cheeks turn pink when he gives Steve the blinding dimple laden smile.

Eddie blissfully living his life, eating Steve’s snacks at movie nights, and riding along in the car when the kids get dropped off at the arcade.

And months go by. Long torturous months where Steve (or really Robin) is sure he’s developing an ulcer because he always has a stomach ache.

Until Steve finally decides he can’t do this to himself any longer. He thought at least having Eddie in his life was better than not. But his heart hurts constantly and if he doesn’t cut Eddie out of his life, he knows it’ll never heal.

So he stops accepting the invitations to hang out. Comes up with excuse after excuse until Eddie stops asking.

He stops engaging in the conversations when Dustin or Lucas talk about that week’s campaign or this amazing thing Eddie did.

And he’s… fine.

Sure maybe when he’s trying to fall asleep some (most) nights he wonders if Eddie ever went to that new music store. Or if he ever found out if his weird neighbor was poisoning the stray cats or not.

He acts like the fact Eddie seems to be unfazed about the whole thing, isn’t the most painful thing ever. That Steve vanishing from Eddie’s inner circle didn’t even generate an annoying little blip for him to question it.

It’s fine.

He’s fine.

Until one seemingly innocuous afternoon, when Steve is at the Hallmark store picking up a birthday gift for his mom. He’s holding something with a generic motivational quote in his hands when a bang hits the store window to Steve’s left.

He jumps at the sound and turns immediately, his body poised in a defensive stance, when his eyes register what he’s seeing.

Eddie Munson with both palms smashed against the window gawking at Steve. The man’s eyes are wide and his mouth is open and he looks like he’s seen a ghost.

Steve catches his breath when he realizes he’s not in any danger, and he gives Eddie one of those mouth pressed smiles and a small nod. It’s been so long since they’ve seen each other Steve has to pretend it’s not causing him physical pain.

Then Eddie starts side stepping toward the entrance. He’s keeping his body facing Steve through the glass like he’s afraid if he looks away Steve will evaporate.

Steve knew he wouldn’t get away with never seeing Eddie again, but he had been hoping. He’s trying to ignore the desire to turn heel and find a back exit, and thinks maybe Eddie will just wanna say hi. Maybe Steve will only have to endure five minutes of interaction and they’ll go their own merry way.

“Steve!” Eddie says a little too loudly.

“Hey, man.” Steve smiles and hopes it looks friendly.

“Where have you been?” Eddie moves to stand directly in front of Steve, basically blocking him against the display table he’d been in front of.

“What do you mean?” Steve swallows a lump as he watches Eddie’s face twist into an expression of bewilderment.

“You kinda fell off the face of the earth, man. I was next door at Radio Shack and was headed to my van and thought I saw a figment of my imagination through the glass.” Eddie’s eyes suddenly dart around as of their surroundings just dawned on him. “Um…I kinda need…I’ve been thinking…can we, uh, talk? Somewhere more private?”

Steve’s mind starts flipping through possibilities of why Eddie can’t just say what he wants to say. It sounds ominous and he guesses they should get this over with. Maybe after this he’ll never have to worry about seeing Eddie ever again.

“We could go to my van? If-if you were ok with that?” Eddie quickly tacks on the last sentence.

“Sure?” Steve shrugs, sets the unimportant birthday gift on the table, and follows a step or two behind Eddie.

Eddie keeps glancing over his shoulder like he assumes Steve will dart out from behind him and book it across the parking lot. It’s making Steve nervous.

Eddie moves to the back of his van and unlocks the door, pulling it open and motioning to Steve to sit down. Steve cautiously slides his butt back onto the van, letting his legs dangle over the bumper, in case he needs to make a quick exit.

When Eddie sits down there’s an awkward amount of space between them. Steve ignores how the distance physically shows how much has changed between them.

“I…uh,” Eddie sighs then lolls his head back staring upward.

Steve can tell he’s trying to collect himself before continuing.

“Sorry, man.” Eddie chuckles nervously giving Steve a weak smile. “I wasn’t planning on doing this today so just trying to organize my thoughts.”

Steve is about three seconds away from vomiting all over the nearby asphalt. This is awful.

“I just…” Eddie turns his head to look at Steve. He looks pained, like whatever he’s about to say may crush Steve.

It probably will.

“I wanted to apologize, for…whatever it is I did. I know I’m obnoxious sometimes.” He rolls his eyes “Jeff tells me to chill out constantly.”

Steve pinches his eyebrows in confusion.

“I miss hanging out and seeing you, but I get it. You don’t give a shit about D&D or any of the other stupid things I talk about. I probably forced it and you are just too good of a dude to say anything. But that’s ok… I’ve done a lot of thinking…lately. You helped, sorta, expose something…about myself that I didn’t know.” He sighs before continuing. “I mean, I guess in theory I knew, but I just thought everyone felt like that.”

Steve feels like he’s traversing a perilous hike without a map right now, totally and completely lost.

Eddie clears his throat and fiddles with his skull ring. “I miss you. I mean, hanging out with you.”

Steve stares, unsure what to say. He probably looks like he’s short circuiting right now, because he doesn’t understand.

It’s been weeks, months even, and he never reached out. He never called or stopped by Steve’s place but he’s talking like it’s been killing him this whole time.

“I-I don’t understand.”

“What do you mean?” Eddie cocks his head.

“You missed me?”

“Yeah, of course.” He says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world. “Why wouldn’t I? We used to hang out all the time, Steve. I saw you more than I saw Wayne, most days.”

“Why didn’t you ever call me then?”

“Did you want me to?” Eddie laughs awkwardly. “You stopped wanting to do anything. I figured you didn’t want to see me, it was pretty obvious. I was trying to respect your wishes, dude.”

Steve doesn’t know what to say.

Eddie kicks his feet a little while he keeps his eyes pointed down at the parking lot.

“Oh,” Steve’s heart breaks for a different reason this time. “You didn’t do anything, by the way. It’s not your fault. I just needed to focus and get my shit together. My dad bitching about college again and I needed a new job. I was just sort of…distracted.”

By you

“Oh, you coulda said something. This whole time I thought you hated me. That’s a fucking relief.” Steve can sense Eddie’s entire body relax next to him.

“Opposite really,” he mutters under his breath.

“What’d you say?” Eddie leans in, his face shifting to seriousness.

“Oh nothing,” he brushes off. “Ignore me.”

“Opposite?” Eddie’s voice is pitched.

Steve’s stomach drops.

“No-no, um…”

Steve puts his palms on the floor of the van and pushes himself out of the van. He wipes his palms on his jeans. He needs to get out of here.

“I gotta go, uh, it was good seeing you, man. Um,” he wants to suggest hanging out but he can’t say the words. “Bye.”

Steve gives a finger wave and wants to smack himself in the face for how stupid it looks. He power walks away from Eddie’s van toward his car. He can get out of here unscathed.

“NO! Steve! Wait, wait,” Eddie’s chasing close behind Steve.

Steve fumbles with his keys as he tries to unlock his car door.

“Me too!”

Steve stops, his hands hovers over the door handle. Did he hear Eddie correctly?

Eddie approaches cautiously. “Me too,” he repeats quietly. “Opposite. You-that was the thing. The thing I figured out. This was it.”

Steve turns slowly.

“I missed you, Steve.” Eddie’s eyes are big and bright as if someone handed him a Christmas present. “I missed you, more than I should’ve probably. Definitely more than…a friend would.” He shrugs and pulls his bottom lip into his mouth.

Steve’s ears are ringing. The planet has shifted, he’s sure of it. Is Eddie saying what he’s been craving from the man for almost two years?

“Opposite,” Eddie whispers.

“Opposite,” Steve echoes.

“I really wanna kiss you right now,” Eddie says gently.

Steve’s eyebrows shoot up and he stumbles back thunking his elbow against the car window. “Ow, shit.”

“Are you ok?” Eddie steps forward, reaching a hand out but avoiding touching Steve.

“Yeah,” he rubs his hand over it. “Do you-do you wanna come over? My parents aren’t home. Won’t be until Thursday.”

“That’s four days away, Steve. Are you suggesting I’ll be at your house for four days?” He twists his mouth in a sly smirk.

“Maybe, if we needed it.” Steve’s heart is pounding in his chest pleasantly now.

Eddie blushes and ducks his head. Steve can tell the man’s holding himself back.

“You coming?” Steve tilts his head.

“Fuck, I hope so,” Eddie growls.

coffee? ☕️🍩💕

[kenntolog]

sukuna realizing your sad because a classmate was flirting with him and ur just all upset because you thought he dont want u anymore. IM SORR I NEED SOME FLUFF

𝝑𝝔 an: hope u enjoy thisssss!!! read more ab cool bf sukuna x loser reader here!!

you’ve been avoiding sukuna and he knows it.

it’s not that hard to see when you’re walking around with a sad face, getting to the lecture hall later than him so he doesn’t find a way to sit by your side, not answering his messages properly, not going to his practice games with lame excuses. and honestly, sukuna is kind of hurt because you refuse to acknowledge that he cares and tell him what is bothering you.

but sukuna isn’t dumb. and it was fairly easy to realise that you were upset with him because you were jealous of yorozu from his group literally throwing herself at him at every chance she got. it wasn’t anything new since she has been bothering him from the first year of university, when they were introduced as classmates.

it seemed like yorozu’s sense of obsession with him got stronger with upcoming spring. she was not leaving his side in the hallways, trying to tag along with whatever he was doing even while he didn’t spare her a glance, she was calling him the nickname he only allowed you to use which pissed him off further and she clung to him like a vice, her grip not wavering even when her dumb friends called out to her.

and in these moments, while sukuna’s mind was filled with questions like ‘how to get away with murder’, your insecurities got the best of you, seeing how sukuna, though visibly annoyed, didn’t seem to push her away completely. so you stopped walking up to him in the hallways after classes to plant his favourite types of kisses on his cheeks and you avoided catching his eyes because it hurt.

yorozu is beautiful, her beauty is carnal and almost every guy in the university drools over her so it shouldn’t come off as a surprise that maybe… maybe you aren’t the best choice for sukuna?

it goes on like this for a couple of excruciating days; jin and yuuji don’t risk asking about why sukuna seemingly only busies himself with practice and why he dons a deep scowl. they suspect that it’s something related to you, but don’t interfere and sukuna is happy they don’t. his mind is constantly focused on trying to get to you and as much as he wants to go to your place and talk things out… he’s scared. and he gives you space, thinking that the situation won’t escalate further.

but it does, when he catches you in the empty hallway, trying to get to your class with the saddest expression he’s ever seen you have. sukuna calls out to you, speeding up his steps and you stop, something hopeful burning in your eyes as you wait for him patiently.

yet, of course, yorozu appears out of nowhere with her wide smile and catches up to him quickly. sukuna sees the hope in your eyes quickly switch to betrayal, your bottom lip trembling and eyes glistening with tears as you turn away and run towards the bathroom. something cracks inside of him. but this time he’s not going to let damned yorozu stop him.

he rips his arm away from her grip, stepping back instantly while she looks up at him as if nothing is happening, “piss off or i will get violent.”

“‘kunaa~ why you gotta be so rude?” she leans her head against his shoulder insistently, batting her eyelashes at him. his eyes only see red when he hears the nickname again and he decides that he’s gonna use a different method this time.

he slowly guides his hand up her arm, feeling her relax under his touch, and weaves his fingers through her hair gently before his grip tightens and he tugs her head back roughly.

finally her face displays something other than satisfaction and that ugly smirk, and he shakes her in his hold while his other hand covers her mouth to stop her from making any sounds.

“don’t ever fuckin’ call me that,” he leans closer to her face. “and if you come up to me anytime again i won’t stop at this.”

she whimpers and nods shakily, trying to pull away before he harshly lets go of her hair, causing her to fall down.

he runs to the bathroom quickly, entering without any care and looks under the cabins to see where you are, but you seem to have found another place to hide while he was busy with yorozu. sukuna runs around looking through empty classes until he finally finds you in the art class, sitting in the corner farthest from the door and sniffling quietly.

“baby?” you jolt in your spot and cover your face with your hands, hurriedly wiping away your tears. he approaches you slowly, his hands itching to touch you, but he understands that you might not want that. “you cryin’?”

“no?” you croak out, sobbing a little more and sukuna feels like getting punched in the face repeatedly. you finally look at him, and sukuna steps closer to stand between your legs.

“‘m sorry.”

“you don’t have to apologise, y’know? ‘s okay if you like her.”

now, that’s crazy. “the fuck? i hate that bitch.”

you give him an unsure look and he sinks onto his knees before you, tugging your hands down from your face before he cups your jaw like he loves to do. you pout at him, still sniffling and trying to avoid his gaze, but he doesn’t let you, gently shaking your head to make you focus on him.

“look at me, baby.”

“‘m looking, ‘kuna.”

“no, do it properly.”

you take a few deep breaths, wiping your nose with your sleeve messily. and lock gazes with him. sukuna leans down, slotting his lips against yours, his free hand resting on top of your head. the weight of it is familiar to you, making you relax into him, your hands wrapping around his arm.

he pulls away, stroking your hair as he looks down at you with a gentle look in his eyes.

“i don’t want her. i only want you and i want you to engrave it into your thick skull or i will do it myself.”

you give him an unsure smile, eyes a little bit brighter now.

“i’m sorry for makin’ you feel like this.”

“i’m sorry for not talking to you about it.”

sukuna nods at you, hugging you close to his chest and kissing the top of your head lovingly, before he tightens his hold on you so much you start punching his back.

“but if you ever decide to run from me again i will kill you.”

“‘kuna, can’t breathe—”

[appocalipse]

that guy ⊹ steve harrington

summary: After he's been to yet another failed date with yet another random pretty girl, Steve Harrington, your best friend, stops by at the diner your family owns for a late-night chat, same as he'd done a thousand times before. Steve is totally unaware of how much he's hurting you with his endless parade of dates, because after all — the two of you are only friends and nothing more, right? It's not like you have any secret feelings for him… | 2.6k words

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

The moment Steve steps through the glass doors of the diner, you wonder, for about the millionth time that month alone, what is it that you've done so wrong to deserve this kind of punishment.

It's Friday night, and on Friday nights, Steve Harrington goes on dates. It's just like clockwork, really: he meets a pretty girl, thinks she's the one, takes her out on a date, realizes quickly enough that she isn't quite what he was looking for, then comes here after having dropped her back home to sulk with you, in the diner that your family runs, still clad in the outfit he'd chosen especially for his failed date.

To be honest, he never looks sad, per se — more like disappointed. Frustrated, maybe.

You watch as he weaves around tables occupied by laughing friends, past booths filled with couples sharing desserts, then slides into a seat in front of you at the bar. Steve sits down with an exhausted sigh, ruffling up his hair before shooting you a tired smile.

"Hi."

You don't look up from where you're polishing the counter. "Bad date again?"

"Not even close. She talked about horses non-stop."

A quiet laugh slips past your lips despite yourself, and finally, you tear your gaze off the dark wooden surface of the counter to look up at him; he's got this pleased little smile on his face, the corners of his eyes crinkled ever so slightly in the way they always do whenever he succeeds at making you laugh, even if just a little.

How are you supposed to keep acting like nothing's wrong when he looks at you like that?

You clear your throat awkwardly and make yourself busy stacking clean glasses next to the coffee machine.

"So...not the one, I take it?"

Steve leans forward against the counter and props his head up with his hand, sighing deeply.

"I'm starting to think she won't ever show up," he says quietly, running his other hand through his hair. You chance another glance at him and note how genuinely worried he looks. It breaks your heart almost as much as it annoys you. "What is it that's wrong with me, huh? I just don't get it."

"Nothing is wrong with you."

"You don't need to be nice to me. We've been friends since forever, remember?"

The word 'friends' makes you wince a little bit inside, but you hide the reaction behind a neutral frown. "Do you think there's something wrong with me? Because I haven't found the one yet either, you know."

Steve's expression softens as he looks at you, and once again you feel that horrible twinge in your stomach that you wish would just stop already.

"It's different. I mean—you're not actively trying to find someone." He reaches out to pull one of the half-melted mints out from the glass bowl on the counter and pops it into his mouth with a shrug. "I go out looking for her and she just doesn't come. If she even exists, that is."

"She does."

"Well, thanks for the vote of confidence, but I wouldn't hold my breath. God, why am I such an idiot, y'know?" Steve slumps over the counter with a groan, burying his face into his crossed arms. "My love life is a trainwreck."

"At least you have one."

He glances up at you curiously and lifts an eyebrow. "What does that mean?"

"Nothing. Forget it. Do you want some pie?"

You're not about to tell him what you've only admitted to yourself mere months ago — that you're actually hopelessly, madly, stupidly in love with him, and that you have been ever since the two of you were just dumb kids racing around your parents' diner.

What makes it even worse is that you had no idea your feelings went that deep until Steve started going on these dates of his again. Before then, everything was normal — you met up every weekend and binged on candy, watched bad movies on your couch, drove around town together blasting The Clash on his BMW's speakers...it was good.

Until it wasn't.

"Wait, c'mon, you can't just leave me hanging like that," Steve presses. He shifts a little on his stool to better face you, then gestures at you with his hands. "You've clearly got something you wanna say, so, like—hit me. Lay it on me."

"Nothing. I'm just saying...at least you're trying, you know," you say carefully, measuring each word before speaking them. "And at least you're the one doing the rejecting. Could be worse."

Steve's eyebrows rise high up on his forehead and he looks at you incredulously. "Whoa, wait—are you trying to tell me you've been rejected?"

You busy yourself by filling two tall glasses with soda, then slide one to his side of the counter and keep the other for yourself. "Uh...kind of, yeah. But it's fine."

"But who the hell would even do that?" he blurts out. There's anger in his voice all of a sudden, a defensive fire in his eyes that makes you feel as if someone has punched you in the gut. "To you? You're like, the nicest person on the planet, and super pretty to boot. That's just—that's crazy!"

Your heart gives a violent little jump in your chest. He thinks you're pretty. Steve Harrington thinks you're pretty.

Pretty as a friend, you correct yourself immediately, and sigh as you sip your drink. Of course, it's nothing more than that — just meaningless words spoken in a moment of unthinking kindness.

"Seriously, who?" he presses on. "Give me a name. I'll fight him."

"You mean like you fought Jonathan Byers?" you smile behind your glass, looking at him from over its rim.

Steve looks embarrassed at the memory and drops his gaze for a second or two before meeting your eyes again with a playful little smile of his own. "Different situation, okay, but that's not the point. So? Who's the guy?"

"You...don't know him," you hedge.

"It's Hawkins. I know the stray cats here by name."

"Fine, well, even if you did know him, it doesn't matter. He didn't reject me, exactly...not really."

Steve frowns a little. "Okay, you're gonna have to start making sense now. This is hurting my head."

The funny thing is, he actually looks confused, as if he can't possibly fathom the idea of someone rejecting you. It's sweet, really — way too sweet for your liking, especially when you know fully well he doesn't see you in the way you'd want him to.

You lower your gaze to avoid his and instead focus on drawing random shapes on the counter with your index finger, where tiny droplets of condensation from your glass have pooled up on the dark wood. "I mean, I never really told him how I felt. Not directly. It just…never happened."

"Oh. Well, then how do you even know if he feels the same way?" he asks you, looking rather doubtful.

You steal another glance at him and almost regret it instantly. His eyes are trained on your face, patient and attentive like you're the only thing worth watching in the world. It makes you feel horribly small and selfish and guilty, because after all, what right do you have to want him when he so clearly wants someone else?

You feel like you could cry. You might, if you don't distract yourself with something fast enough.

"I just know. Do you want some pie? I'll go get you some pie."

Without waiting for a response, you rush off to the kitchen even though there's plenty of pies sitting on the display counter at the bar, and you make a beeline straight for the back exit.

The alley behind the diner is blissfully empty as usual, just a lonely dumpster and a handful of sad-looking shrubs and weeds peeking out from under the concrete.

No, you aren't going to cry.

This is stupid.

You press your back against the rough brick wall of the diner and breathe in deep the warm night air, then exhale slowly as you count to ten in your head.

When the door opens behind you and the diner's familiar chatter and clatter of cutlery spill into the alley, you wince, mentally cursing yourself for being so goddamn weak. You should have known better.

You don't have to look up to know that it's him.

"Are you hiding from me?" Steve's voice comes, quiet and curious and maybe just a little bit hurt, even.

"I got...suddenly nauseous," you explain weakly, still refusing to look up and meet his eyes.

There's a long stretch of silence, and you feel Steve move closer to you until he's leaning against the wall by your side. You finally look up and find him smiling, this gentle, amused little thing that makes your traitorous heart skip a beat.

"You look just fine to me."

You stare up at the sky, head against the wall. "I thought I was gonna throw up."

He's still watching you, you can tell; you're keenly aware of his eyes on you, so much so that your skin prickles at the attention. "No, you didn't."

"No, I didn't," you admit with a sigh, and turn your head to finally look at him. He's got this little half-smile on his lips, the very same one you fell for years ago, and you curse yourself silently for never learning how to let him go. Really let him go.

"Hey. Listen. You don't have to tell me, okay?" Steve says gently, pushing himself off the wall to step closer to you. He brings his hand up to your face and tucks a loose lock of hair behind your ear, letting his fingertips linger on the edge of your jaw for the briefest of moments, just long enough for you to wonder whether he knows what he's doing to you.

You don't dare to move. You're afraid of breaking whatever spell has seemingly come over him.

"I should've never asked. That was selfish."

"Forget it," you say.

He's standing close now, close enough that you have to tilt your chin up to be able to look up at him properly. There's a strange kind of tension in his eyes, something dark and unsure and tentative, and his gaze darts down to your lips just the slightest bit.

You're fairly sure you're just seeing what you want to see, your foolish heart playing tricks on you. But you panic nonetheless, feeling a sudden, irrational fear that if he moves any closer, he'll realize the truth — that you're a liar and a coward, that you've been harboring these feelings of yours for him for years.

"I should—I should go. Back inside," you mutter, pointing vaguely at the door with your thumb. "In there."

"Sure, yeah. Okay. In there," he echoes, not making a single move to leave. "Not out here."

"Yup. Exactly. In there."

"So you said."

"Yep."

The wall of the diner is digging into your spine uncomfortably, and your mouth is dry, and your knees feel weak, and your stomach is doing somersaults, and the longer he stares at you with those eyes of his the more you feel like you're burning from the inside out and—

He's not moving. All he does is look at you, really look at you, as if it's the first time he's really looked, as if he's seeing something that wasn't there before.

"Okay, so—"

You try to push past him towards the door, but Steve grabs your arm, making you stop dead in your tracks. He lets go as soon as you look up at him, lifting his hand in front of him in an apologetic gesture.

"Sorry. I'm sorry," he says. He swallows hard and rubs his palm on the front of his jeans, a nervous little habit you think he's always had. He runs his hand through his hair, mussing up the carefully gelled strands, and it's probably the first time you've ever seen him look so flustered.

He laughs nervously and gestures at the ground with his hands as he speaks. "Look, this is just—this is just crazy, okay, but I think I, uh, maybe sort of realized something."

You blink at him, not quite certain you're hearing him correctly.

"Realized what?" you ask, the words barely more than a whisper.

Steve clears his throat and nods at you, seemingly pleased that you've finally spoken. "Yeah, well, this is stupid, but you know how you're always telling me to listen to my gut?"

"You're not making a whole lot of sense right now, Steve."

"Just bear with me for a sec, okay? This is like, totally new to me." He holds his palms up, and you notice his hands are shaking a little. "I just need a minute, alright?"

He breathes in deep and exhales slowly, then shoots you an apologetic look.

"Sorry, this is just...really weird," he confesses. "Weirdly real."

"You're freaking me out," you tell him, but Steve only smiles at you.

"Maybe I should just show you. Because, I mean, what if I'm wrong? That'd be terrible, obviously."

"Steve."

"Yeah, I know, but hear me out, okay?" he says quickly, and takes another step closer. You stand your ground this time, if only because you don't trust yourself to actually move without your legs giving out. "So, look. Here's the thing. You're, like—you're one of the most important people in my life. You've been there for me when nobody else was, and I...you mean a lot to me."

"Steve—"

"Shut up, you're ruining the moment."

He takes another step forward until he's crowding you against the wall, hand coming to rest next to your head on the brick. He's close, so close that you can smell the scent of his cologne and shampoo and laundry detergent, and if you were to lean in even the slightest bit, your faces would bump.

Steve is a little out of breath, his lips parted ever so slightly. And he's still looking at you with that strange, searching expression of his.

"Is this okay?" he whispers.

"I don't—what?"

Your voice catches in your throat. There's no room for doubt in his eyes now, not even the tiniest, slightest sliver of uncertainty left.

"This," Steve murmurs.

He tilts his head to the side a little and leans in until you're sure your noses are touching, and you feel your eyes slip closed in anticipation.

"Is this okay?" he repeats in a whisper. "Please tell me I'm not crazy."

"I think I am."

His lips brush yours. It feels like an accident, doesn't last long enough to be anything but a dream. You can still taste the faint, sweet trace of sugar and mint on your tongue when he pulls away, though.

"Just to be clear," Steve whispers, his fingers brushing lightly over the skin of your neck, tracing invisible lines that make you shiver, "am I the guy from earlier? The one you like?"

You don't have it in you to deny it anymore.

"Yes. It's you."

A wide grin breaks out across his face, and suddenly he's everywhere; he cups your face in his hands, pressing eager, fervent kisses along the line of your jaw, trailing hot and open-mouthed down the side of your neck.

You giggle helplessly, grabbing Steve by his collar to pull him away from you and up to your eye level. He's breathing just as heavily as you are, his hair messy and his eyes bright.

"How do you do this to me, huh?" he pants, kissing your forehead, the tip of your nose, the corner of your mouth. "You just—you just completely knock me out."

A pleasant little thrill rushes up your spine at that.

"Oh yeah?"

"Completely."

You kiss him this time.