#like its being Worked On when im inspired but im ALWAYS thinking abt it

[huellitaa]

⋅˚₊‧ ୨ feeling uncomfy in ur own skin

ok so this is something ive been struggling with for years. like i wake up some days and just feel Eugh way more than id like to. SO i decided i'd make a little guide on this! for me and for you 🩷✨

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 reasons why we could be feeling uncomfortable with ourselves and who we are

♡ having a shitty mental diet and consuming media and things that make you feel bad abt urself

♡ being in an environment where we're constantly being judged or put down, even over the most basic things

♡ hanging around negative people or negative places

♡ not giving urself enough credit for ur own achievements and accomplishments

♡ changing urself constantly for others and not having a clear sense of self to hold on to

♡ not having boundaries on how you and others treat you

♡ staying stagnant in the same place in your life and not changing (🎀🗒️also read: get comfy being uncomfy ♡)

♡ not paying enough attention to yourself and avoiding your genuine thoughts, feelings and emotions

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 1. be gentle with yourself!

pleasepleaseplease its ok to have bad days its ok to not feel great every day. treat yourself as you would someone you love. if you just aren't feeling good today, then you aren't feeling good! honour that and respect that and deal with that accordingly. even if you are uncomfortable with yourself right now or you don't like yourself right now, please try and treat yourself with care regardless, because no matter what stage you are in in your life right now you are and always will be the most important person in ur life, so TREAT URSELF LIKE IT🫶💖

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 2. inspiration, not comparison!

i know its often told not to go looking at people who are ahead of you in these times but hear me out. i think looking at and observing people you admire who are further ahead of you is very motivating to build yourself up and *become more like them* in your own way. you look up to them because of ___? what can you do to become your own version of that? thinking like this gets me more inspired to just get out of bed because i want to be more like them.

two words for this one - NO. COMPARISON. gaining inspiration from others to better yourself and comparing yourself to others are two completely different things. 🫶 (shameless self promo, but i have a post on this here! 🩷✨)

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 3. analysis: detective work chapter!

journal and think and think to urself why u might feel like this or what caused this. when did it start? has anything happened lately that may have caused this? how does it feel, in depth? what can you do to combat this? how can you make it through the day & make it so you do even better tomorrow?

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 4. channeling the mindset!

back to my point on our idols, thinking like them & thinking what they'd do in this situation helps me a lot. personally one of my idols is ada lovelace so whenever im really tired and unmotivated or insecure on my abilities or appearance or anything else i think to myself "what would she do?" and 9 times out of 10 im up at my desk in my cutest outfit hard at work. this is def one of my favourite points and something i use on the daily for like literally everything and 100% recommend 🩷✨

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 5. what would i do?

similarly, ask urself what the best version of yourself or the version of urself youre working towards would do in this situation. be your own inspiration. be ur own muse. would they stay in bed and rot all day? if the answer is no then ur up. out. immediately. ask urself what they would do. if ur feeling drained, would they take a day off to do some self care and recharge? if ur feeling sad, would they be gentle with themselves and let themselves feel sad for a little while & try to work to the root of the problem?

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 6. understanding yourself!

make a list of the things that make you the happiest and most comfortable & productive and the things that make you the unhappiest and the opposite of those things. i mentioned this in my recharge day post, but figuring out these will help you find out which negative behaviours or habits are lowering ur vibrations and making u feel like this, and help u to engage more in the things that make you happy with yourself and everything around you 💗✨

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 7. pay attention!

pay close attention to ur internal landscape and your self talk throughout the day. note down every little thing you notice, even if you think it won't be helpful; for example, do you find yourself indulging in negative talk abt urself, negative talk abt others, constantly being pessimistic and expecting the worst, indulging in judgement and criticism of urself and everyone around you, getting distracted easily, and so on.

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 8. what would i do, part 2

like i mentioned earlier, you should be your own inspiration. you should be your own muse. as much as it's nice to have idols, when ur trying to change something about urself and adjust and improve ur own behaviours, you should be mainly focusing on what you want to achieve by changing said behaviours. do you know who you're working towards being? do you know how you want to feel? do you know what you are changing these things you feel into? think about whether or not the person you are now lines up with the person you want to be in all aspects of ur life. if you feel like you aren't even trying to meet these standards then of course ur gonna feel bad about urself. of course don't be too hard on urself, but keep this in mind. 💓✨

finally, remember that these things are temporary and it wont be like this forever. ur beautiful and perfect no matter what and in these times u gotta show up for yourself even more and never give up! i believe in u 🫶🩷

all my love 💗💬✨🎀

[enden-k]

I lob it art omg it’s just PERFECTTTTTT

Idk if you could go into detail (or if you’ve already talked abt it) but how’d you come up with the designs for ur kavetham witch au? They look so cool they make me want to consume them like cake 🍰

ok i think i told the story of how i created fantasy au a few times already but sjkbackc i dont mind

april 2023 i was prefarming for kaveh mats. was during the interdarshan championship update, kaveh was released in the 2nd half so i spent quite some time in the newly dropped sumeru region (realm of farakhkert/gavireh lajavard) to farm mourning flowers and fungal spores

i doodled hthm working hard to farm for kvh and him with the lil fungi and their big hats gave me an idea to draw him with a big hat like a cool witch. thought about it more and came up with a neat idea for a story so yea, my au and witchtham lit was inspired by the fungi while i was in the middle OF DRAWING THIS PIECE AHHA

(i think i said before when i talked about my ocs that i have a "problem" of always coming up w concepts and ideas and stories and whatever super fast. i can like, listen to one track or look at one thing and immediately get an idea for a fully fleshed out story. my brain is almost always full w stuff, its a blessing and a curse bc i cant work on 100 things at the same time. im not srsly complaining btw ok🧍‍♀️)

me lit the same day:

and boom, doodled the idea out and it turned into a big au now AHHA

i rlly just wanted to draw him w a biiiiig hat and since im a SUCKER for badass witches and like, this very specific, amano aesthetic i have, i came up w smth that is still hthm but smth witchy

at first the idea rlly just was prince kaveh and witch haitham and kaveh being cursed and hiring haitham for his services; them on a journey trying to break the curse and falling in love with each other

over the year i fleshed the idea out more and more, changed their designs a little, thought of the entire story, designed the rest of the party and yea........this au is literally my baby <3 (its almost 4am rn so im sry if my answer is a bit short or rushed, i just wanted to answer it asap without rambling too much bc im always excited talking abt it ajkcbsk)

i love drawing it, i love talking about it, if theres more questions feel free to ask !! 💙

[hunny-pp]

i've been forgetting to yap abt it, but i think there's smth crazy abt the dynamic between su jue and yu ran (as if you can't tell w my fervent shipping of them)

read more for length

the clear black and white visual designs between them but within that they have the shared colour of similar shades of purple, in a way showing that they balance and compliment each other. Yu Ran representing light and justice while Su Jue is his shadow, doing all the dirty deeds - but I like that the reason why they work together so well is because they have a bit of that light and darkness in the other

like there's something INSANE about yu ran over the fact that he KNEW that su jue could take on masculine disguises (and almost exclusively we've only rly seen her w the exception of being yu xu disguise herself as men) and KEPT HIS MOUTH SHUT when his co-workers were explaining that her one weakness is her inability to disguise as men.

he was willing to let a powerful political and his superior get murdered, resulting in another man becoming a scapegoat for her. Granted, he went through that moral length so she can get some kind of justice for the abuse she went through by li tiangang, as well as knowing that if she went through with her original plan she would have been framed as a scapegoat and it'd set back esper rights by MILES, but he also WANTED the talent she possesses. He has a very ruthless side, succinctly put by his go/chess analogy of making the necessary sacrifices.

the reason why he thought so highly of su jue despite her terrible reputation, it's because he could see she has good in her, he knows she's always had a desire to use her powers to stand up for the little guy, to toy and mock with people who abuse their power. She was the person that INSPIRED Yu Ran to start standing up for himself, and to start wanting to do that for other people, leading him to be a politician. That compassion hidden within su jue is what ultimately convinced her to take the high road and let revenge run its course without her interference, inadvertently saving her life.

In the same way su jue does a lot of dirty work and is a lot more ruthless in ways yu ran cannot be for the sake of his personal values or public image as a gentle and benevolent politician, Yu Ran ALSO did some shady shit in order to save her life, letting someone important get murdered and another man imprisoned for it just by keeping quiet about the truth of su jue and convincing her (with yu xu to help) to take the high road. It goes both ways, it's why they work.

also just some other things that come from my shipping brainrot:

su jue liking the colour ivory for its purity (i wonder who's the same colour.....................)

also doing the gay mirrored single earring thing

yu ran's horns and su jue's tails almost opposite in the color wheel, and i know in some pieces, yu ran's horns are much greener too

also the inherent symbolism and dynamic of the fox vs deer....predator vs prey animal.........

anyway this is my yapping abt why im so obsessed with su jue/yu ran💖, if anyone's got context or a way i can watch the story events where yu ran's got his titties out and is tied up bc i stopped playing around there, much appreciated i need it for my fuel

[wheresmymilliondollarman]

heyyyy🫶🫶 for something quick, do you have any hc of certain AUs for warner? also good luck with prom dress shopping!!💗💗

-🪷

omg hi 🪷!! thank u for the luck i need it cus im sewing some of it and im still a beginner LOLL

for au’s i do have a few that have crossed my mind recently, im sure i can do more that this if i put my mind to it

so i had this idea i scrapped before i even wrote the ferrars! reader hcs and basically its a tangled inspired au (ik super ironic bc kenji is the one tangled obsessed)

reader was hidden away at a young age because of her powers and the restablishment uses them to control the word (like how they utilized emmaline basically) so you live in this secluded tower away from sector 45

so aaron is finds you accidentally when he’s on a mission and he gets separated from his soldiers for a bit and sees the tower

then he climbs up and scares you so you hit him with a pan (LOL) and then you explain that you lived there forever but leave out your gift

aaron reintroduces you to the world and secretly keeps you at the base to hide you from his father (once he learns about what you can do)

then for your birthday he takes you to a festival thing but then your both caught by aarons dad

the rest isnt that planned out but rough synopsis of my idea

and then i often think more abt aaron and reader in present times like

imagine reader and aaron going to the met gala (aaron is ur stylist no one tell me otherwise)

or just any red carpet event, you both tend to match

paparazzi pics of you both

being rumored to break up every week or “cheating” scandals

you both arent really into social media but both def have a pinterest / instagram / maybe twitter

your instagram feed is just pictures of aaron, places, and friends and occasionally yourself

aaron’s feed is literally only pictures of you. he posts like once or twice a month. but his stories are active because he likes to post his outfits or yours.

if you post on any media platform aaron is ALWAYS the first to like & comment no matter what

people constantly asking aaron if he can fight (he always responds he can)

kenji’s the type to make u both participate in tiktoks or prank u with current trends

also you have a group chat with juliette, kenji, nazeera, and adam (he was added by accident but then stayed there)

aaron sends you random pictures of things that reminds him of you. anytime your not tigether he’s going to message you a bunch.

sugar daddy! aaron warner is literally the dream. this one is set in modern era

you are a college student struggling financially, and if you dont get money for tuition you can go to school/will be kicked out. your parents kicked you out for following your own dream, so you have no one to turn to

aaron is a ceo, happens to find you at your job as a barista. he immediately thinks tour the most beautiful person ever and wants to know you. so he shows up almost everyday to the place even though its out of his way to work.

you two get to know each other a bit and you let your financial situation slip out, so aaron offers you money, but you decline and such.

you think thats it, but then you later get an email to let you know your tuition is covered.

you feel bad and offer aaron anything to let ypu repay him in some way, so he bargains that you let him take you to places and basically date him.

so that starts your arrangement.

buys you quite literally anything — even if you dont say you want it. if you glance at it in a store, you’ll see it on your bed the next day.

you even get to move into his apartment because he hates the idea of you in those ugly small dorms, and i’ll be easier for you both to see each other. (he’s clingy)

you go with him at any event, he literally never went to any before he started seeing you now he wants to take you everywhere in pretty dresses

even when your officially dating he won’t stop buying you things, if anything it doubles.

this ones dark so TW but with the the hype of the scream movies going around it got me imagining ghostface! aaron warner working with ghost face! kenji (i imagine this set in the 90s type era bc 1st scream is so iconic)

in this au aaron’s abusive childhood enabled him to have psychopathic tendencies so he starts off with random killings then later gets into the ghostface thing after wanting to get revenge on juliette for cheating on him with adam.

aaron enlists kenji because kenji’s the one that figure out it was him, but he’s doesn’t want him to turn aaron in, he wants to help. but kenji is kind of easy to manipulate so aaron is the master mind.

aaron makes the calls and kenji does most of the killing.

aaron and you are already dating when the killings start happening

you were originally meant to be killed bc you’re bffs with juliette but then aaron fell in love with you so now he protects you (#couplegoals)

if anyone messes with you or a guy gets too close with you, they’re gone. if a person is involved with you then aaron is likely to kill, especially if he already doesn’t like them

adam is the first to go (LMAOO), then its brendan, ian, nazeera (queen was a fighter im sorry

your so oblivious to it all and very scared that ghostface going after you next. and aaron thinks that’s so cute. so much that he calls your house as ghostface just so you can call him all scared and run into his arms for protection.

and if you somehow figure it out he’s just going to kidnap you and lock you somewhere you can’t escape and leave him <3 (i’m insane for wanting that)

[unknownteapot]

Hope you're alright! I went and rewatched the babe ruth/bazanka video again after your post abt it and its just soooooo. They're SO impressed with each other from the start!! If you watch a lot of Amanda's appearances before that point, she's generally really good about not breaking (v professional) but the whole video she's just. Breaking to make comments on how good Angela is doing or to poke her character. And Angela's FIRST character video and having someone like Amanda constantly hyping her up... gaahhh. Sorry this isnt really a question, although if you have further thoughts on that vid, love to hear them 👀

- shesmore-shoebill

hiii @shesmore-shoebill :,) it's always nice seeing you pop up on the dash!!

i'm doing a little better, thank you <3 youre so right though, that video was insaneeeee, i didnt lie when i made a post about it being like shourtney's 'see you at work' moment. and going back and watching it again is just.. like it makes me emotional almost cause thats where amangela started you know? :,) im so chill and fine about that video and obviously its really funny and stuff but i always end up fixated on amangela cause like u mentioned, you can see them discover each other in real time. like learn each other's humour, literally watch each other commit *so* hard to a bit. and i think that where the admiration comes from yk? from recognising themselves in each other. like hey- you're just like me, you're the same. a lot of that comes from having done acting i think, specifically character work and that's something (through my very much external goggles) they can relate on.

the fact that angela describes seeing amanda get into her babe ruth character before the video and commit so hard that she decides to just go for it too is so.. like i dont think amanda expected anyone else would go that hard, that's why her 'you're insane' is so multidimensional cause not only is she saying 'you're insane' to the demon girl character (who is rightfully so), but also to angela beneath the surface of of like 'you're insane for doing this, for committing so hard, for the hilarious shit you're saying'. and angela's 'so are you' is not just snark from her character, it's also a jab at amanda because she's committing just as hard, because she's just as hilarious. i really do think that's where their admiration for each other started- i like what u mentioned about amanda being supportive & encouraging- its so nice to have someone in your corner when you're being insanely silly for the entirety of the internet to see. what's nicer is when someone gets just as silly as you <3

(sorry for the essay, you inspired thoughts <3)

[detectivehole]

hey man the anti-AI stuff you reblog is rly. Reactionary idk how else to put it. It’s a mixed bag. AI has been used in art for a LONG time, it’s not as new as ppl think it is. It’s used a lot in animation especially. Obviously there is a difference between AI as a tool and AI as a replacement for artists/writers, but nearly every single instance of them attempting this has been catastrophically bad. (Doesnt stop the dumbass studios like Disney and Pixar to keep trying it tho, bc they value short term profit over any actual value) For AI being used in a professional setting, it’s imperative the distinction be made between tool or replacement. Machines, despite how efficient they have become, are managed by humans. Letting them run without a person actually operating it that knows what they’re trying to do is always a bad idea.

However, using AI generated pics for like. Personal use? Let’s say you aren’t a good artist, or as many have pointed out, can’t be an artist due to disability (none of that inspiration porn abt painting w your mouth some ppl can’t do that either.) and you’d like a picture of your Tabletop game character or OC or something, and you do not have the money to spare for a commission from the artist you like. Doesn’t mean you can’t pay for one later on, as a human will take the finer details you want and bring them to life, but if you’re looking for like. A placeholder? And you aren’t planning on selling it or some shit, then ppl shouldnt get on your case. Except every anti-AI bro now hears “AI” and flies into a frothing rage, saying it’s “never ok”. Nobody should care of somebody made a meme using AI or tried to make something just for themselves or friends. It becomes an issue when it’s being marketed as a “replacement” for artists.

Tldr: AI is a useful tool, the tech bros that got a hold of ot do not represent the entire scope of it. If it is used as a tool or personal use, it’s not an issue. It only becomes one when it is used as an explicit replacement for writers/artists.

i agree with the first paragraph, though im a little insulted you'd assume my knowledge and opinions on AI image generation were so shallow and uninformed as to have to explain it to me- but you lost me after that

first off, i wanna make it clear that basically no one thinks you're some sort of amoral monster for having used or even enjoyed what AI image generation and art can give you. most people genuinely don't understand the intricacies of its ethics and effects, and while ignorance like that is annoying, it's something most people who do get it understand and forgive with a sorta... exasperation. most of the time. now, maybe you're not coming from a place of good faith, i can't say, but i choose to think you are

i don't have the chops, time, or particular desire to explain what exactly is wrong with AI art generation (there's a lot in way too many directions), so i'll just give you a link to get you started (it's not a long read, just some basic critiques to jump from) and some admittedly harsh sounding (but well meant) advice that pertains to your particular use of AI:

you dont always get what you want. you're not entitled, for any reason, to the fruits of stolen (and popular AI datasets have been proven to unequivocally be stolen) artistic labor, especially if that theft is impacting the livelihoods of independent artists. (and don't give me "what about other generic media piracy" because that's its own can of worms and you know it. i won't hear it). it's not the end of the world that you have, but it's just not ethical to generate that art knowing it's based off stolen work- if it was all consensually given data it'd be different- and sometimes behaving ethically means you dont get what you want. tough shit. plenty of people can't or won't draw for all sorts of reasons, and none of those reasons suddenly make it ok for them to take other people's art

to be clear, if all the datasets used to train AI were ethically sourced- bought, donated, or taken from free use material- this wouldn't be an issue. i mean there would still totally be issues with casual generative AI, but this particular issue would be moot. the issue with AI art isn't the AI, it's what the AI's being fed. every time you engage with it gets smarter, and better, and more efficient at chewing up its stolen foods and spitting out a knockoff. the issue is what it's being fed and you are putting tokens in the little treat machine at its petting zoo enclosure

you want a placeholder? you got picrew. doll dress up games. hell, pester your friends for doodles. save up. or even just learn to handle not getting it at all- just pick something else

[narwhalandchill]

(soo ignition teaser thoughts ig)

hmmmm im ngl the trailer itself as a like prelude to what is coming in 5.0 intrigue and plot wise is like. compared to the region teasers that came before w lazzo and overture. its just. its kinda bad im sorry KWKJKWDJKWDJK like okay cool seeing the new cast and production value is high as always (+ music) but its such a middling teaser for the story itself?? it feels like a powerpoint presentation of the cast more than anything narratively coherent with an inherent draw and mystery

like theres mavuika speaking to the flame thingy (xbalanque that u? "one entombed in the primal fire" perhaps????) with some intrigue i suppose as well as her brief thing w capitano. ororon also appearing to be working together or aligned with capitano given theyre standing together there which could make for an interesting plot thread but beyond that its very.... eh. its not giving us a lot to grip onto ya know???? and thats rly a shame especially since i also felt that way abt the teaser in the 4.8 livestream. i wish we got more

and sure theres a tournament wahoo but like. its really Not helping to hype up that thing when half the introduced cast isnt being like "OMG the tournament!!!!1!1 this is HUGE!!!1" (or even. "oh no this is BAD!!!1" to set up basic conflict. like why would they dread it?) but instead just. "oh right... the tournament 🙄🙄" like who thought that was a good idea 😭😭 if the PEOPLE of natlan dgaf abt the big plot event happening then how am i as the viewer supposed to feel majorly invested in it . wow theyre tossing a ball around . wow nobody wants it guess ur tournament is having a bit of a PR issue in the making mavuika lmao

anyway i wouldnt even call myself a true capitano glazer despite being a fatuiHQ enjoyer on the side but like. that hmph still carried welcome capHIMpeaktano truly o7 JWDJWDJKDWJK also did yall see the. anemo-ish turquoise flare when mavuika is confronting (?) him? wonder if thats a thing with her flames or is it implying cap as anemo or sth.... i think itd fit him decent enough but ya. looking forward to HIM for sure

(+ congrats to him for losing the goofy timbs from arles animated short lmao like his design looks so fucking sick now)

character design wise uhhhh. well theres the obvious huge fucking issue here and while id say that hoyo p much already showed their true colors on the matter with sumeru that doesnt rly. make it any less disappointing and egregious wrt all the cultures and peoples theyre So willing to gather inspiration from in all possible aspects Other than the diversity of the people themselves. like its just... bad and such a shame but also not very surprising unfortunately.

(and really it just. looks especially bad given they clearly Can put melanin on people its just... enemy mobs only.)

beyond that i kind of dont have anyone that super catches my eye rn??? mainly because . well leaks moment eek but its basically official info now so basically. xilonens existence as a geo and a 5* (which like . u dont need leaks to guess she will be im sorry jdwjdw) was leaked a bit ago as well as the patch she should appear meaning. im actually in chiori rerun savings mode since its very high chance that she will be back w xilonen if anyone. so thats my plan for now kjdwjkdwjkdwjk

in terms of the actual cast i do like kinich and ororons designs v much, the design motifs of the latter especially are interesting bc those eye-like patterns are almost giving quantum symbol (= black hole imagery) to me???? and thats V interesting especially if hes actually working w capitano and the fatui. now him being a cat boy or whatever animals ears those turn out to be isnt like sth thats huge for Me personally but i do think hes valid and also W for anyone whos into that, congrats guys im happy for u ! but like fr itd be such an insane twist if hoyos Finally introducing the void quantum abyss whatever element w him (and maybe cap too.) bc that symbol Rly is looking Curious. or then hes just electro lol. for kinich its like. yeah fair he might be xiao-tighnari-gaming from minecraft ill admit that but. i do like the color scheme and his outfit a lot JKWJKDJKDWJKD so like i forgive it

w the girlies i overall find them all like. quite nice but so far without any personality + lore known its hard to settle my complete thoughts on them just yet. tho citlali being pink is super refreshing for genshin since we do have a shocking absence of it so like shes definitely one im drawn to, chasca looks interesting and like she could play a bigger part plot wise (maybe?) so that might be neat. both her and citlali being cryo is kinda surprising?? but cool. maybe ill get to unbench my shenhe and play some cryo teams again lmao freeze has been dead in abyss for so long now....

xilonen again w the kemomimi isnt sth im particularly into or not into but she looks cool, depending on personality and how her kit synergies turn out (+ assuming the chiori rerun, the fate of those pulls too), i might try for her as well? theres an Energy to her i like it. if she has proper Attitude and flair thats gonna be a massive bonus for me

mualani i think is rather bland to me, sth about her outfit and design just doesnt click for me even if the shark thing from the teaser before is neat and everything. the chibis are never sth im actively drawn to but like both do look okay, im kinda hoping kachina could be a lynette moment for 5.x and end up a free 4* since her exploration roomba looks p fun

anyway then theres. mavuika and i. well at least the design wasnt. That concept art one (ThoseWhoKnow...) . so instant massive W improvement solely on that basis holy fucking shit but ehhhhh im sorry i still dont know how to feel abt the very modern like. biker bodysuit thingy. im not a huge fan of the bodysuit type designs anyway so its not that surprising but still. her eyes + hair is absolutely stunning tho like not a question at all.

tbh in a way i kinda feel like having too many Thoughts on her design is kinda just unnecessary bc like. shes the archon. of Course the kit is going to be insane so i will get her anyway (UNLESS a pyro onfielder JKWJKJKWJKWJKWFKJ like god please no). and in terms of like is her design and energy from what this vid is giving us good enough that i wont like. Actively resent having to get her for meta and strong teams??? Absolutely. so in that sense ig its all cool lmao

but yeah. idk i just think as a teaser for the upcoming story its rly a shame how weak this felt for me???? like sure overture ended up being a bit of a misleading teaser since it gave the impression of arle as this mastermind of the fontaine AQ which didnt rly happen but it still served as a source of hype and intrigue. and yes lazzo is sth that can Never rly be beat in terms of how out of nowhere it was and how fucking insane the whole harbinger reveal went (+ elogia cinerosa existing) for lore and long term hype but its just. unfortunately those 2 are the regional teasers this natlan one is supposedly meant to parallel and it just didnt deliver anything comparable to those for me

like still looking forward to natlan and seeing the rest of its cast (like im fairly convinced the flame thingy might be xbalanque and hes gonna be a big deal ultimately or sth) and where it goes and all its environments but this trailer didnt rly. grip me the way i wouldve expected it to. which is unfortunate kdjkdwjkwjkdwj but yea thats all

[zukkacore]

🌤️ & ☔ !!

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

okkk so this is cheating b/c this is actually. From an old draft of If You Want Divinity that was way darker. But I might reconstitute it for a new thing b/c I do.... like it, it just didn't fit with the tone:

“Or is this all a… What do you call it? A leap of faith?” He grabs Porter by the hair, pulling his head back so that he’s forced to look him in the eye. “Was there ever a moment you doubted my devotion?” His other hand wraps nicely around Porter’s throat, resting pretty. “Or did you always know I would choose you?” A Message. I can feel everything. All your rage, your shame, your desire, your lovely desperation. Your envy… Does that frighten you? To know you can never hide from me again? It must be some sort of miracle for him to actually intimidate Porter, but rage emboldens him. He’s kept two people under his skin so long that the company is comforting. You don’t have the guts. “You sure?” says Jace. A beat. Do it. His grip slackens.

I am gonna count Message as dialogue :')

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

I have a couple that I'm not sure if I'm gonna finish or go for. A lot of these are kinda ambitious which i used to take on with gusto but i do have a problem with abandoning shit (and delayed gratification) so the idea of committing myself to a big piece is like. Maybe.... maybe.... At the same time, i am that kind of ambitious person, short things are not normally what i do. I have a few ideas that are not the most fleshed out:

I do genuinely really like the idea of doing a You've Got Mail rival academies AU but i also know that would probably take a tone of work and i'm like..... ughhhh. But i think they could do the hate to love thing. Its the Nora Ephron n Meg Ryan collab i think is the most fitting for the two of them (although if there was a when harry met sally (evil version) Take..... maybe)

Vaguely a timeloop au sounds fun. I LOOOOVE a timeloop. and have been wanting to write one for forever but i don't have a strong Vision on it right now. Don't know if its a timeloop to change what happened kind of timeloop or a timeloop to realize you can never go back kind of timeloop. There's also the Timeloop as Redemption angle that i think is fun, that's the groundhog day thing that's the happy death day thing and i think there's precedent of it being like. a Chronomancy thing. Aguefort subject these bitches to a timeloop so you can put them back on your payroll im begging you

Althought time loop purgatory also goes hand in hand with my joke that Porter and Jace should be subjected to a Bad Place Elmville as hell punishment. A vaguely inspired Good Place AU would be really funny i think. Again, it's too formless for me to know what to do with it. I don't actually think it should be that they think they're in The Good Place, i think the trick should be they're convinced ankarna gave them a second shot at life so now they life in elmville only everything is shifted slightly to the left bc its a pocket hell dimension meant to torture them. Like Chidi and Eleanor, oops they fell in love. Again. This is formless.

ALSO kinda goes hand in hand with my joke abt Ankarnatown i made a while back like Jace fetching Porter from hell??? no notes. But like. damn i gotta make it myself?? That sucks

I honestly sincerely might write some zara/clones or lucilla/clones stuff. That ones purely and indulgence. Purely just for me. I wanted to include a small zara/jace throughline or a lucilla/j2 implication in Almost but it just like. Did not have the air for that i just felt like it didn't fit for the tone it just kinda was detracting (as much as zarajace making porter jealouse wouldve been fun) and just in there for me b/c i like Persephades Orphydice

Again this is formless. All i'm gonna say is i drew a gamechanger au. and now i think the idea of Aguefort subjecting his staff to gameshows for personal enrichment is so funny. Aguefort heaven is porter hell its a very efficient system

[razzmothazz]

rambling more abt nightcord and their theme because i just NEED to get it out if my system

i think nightcord is such beautifully constructed with its theme of healing because every character has someone specific helping them out most within the unit

idk how to explain it in general terms but basically

kanade struggles with overworking and not taking proper care of herself, her main help with this comes from mizuki! sure, others help out too but mizuki is the one who points out those self destructive behaviours the most [or at least from ehat i remeber] and this dynamic is so so beautifully shown specifically in carnation recollection

mizuki is the one telling kanade to take a break, but kanade is set on making another song for mafuyu despite being absolutely stuck. i think mizuki is the most clever out of the 4 specifically because of this event, since they knew kanade wont give up on it ever and decided to use a different approach to give her the deserved break and would also help her out in this situation. kanade would never have some time off if it wasnt for mizuki. thats how mizuki cares for her, by "tricking" her into taking one while also getting to spend nice time together and end up reminiscing.

this is such an important story because thanks to mizuki, a part of kanade got to heal.

mafuyu very obviously is mostly helped by kanade, who tries her very best and gives it literally her all to help mafuyu find herself, but she always gives mafuyu space when she needs it as well. i think since this one is most obvious i dont have to dwell on it too much but the love and care kanade has for mafuyu makes me soooo fucking insane like omg. kanade is the whole reason mafuyu even tries. shes the sole reason why mafuyu could get where she is now and didnt give up.

ena is a bit tricky, but surprisingly i think her helper is... mafuyu. i have honestly no clue how to explain what i mean at all, but seeing someone with so much talent and the "perfect" life be completely empty was so important to enas character. mafuyu makes painfully slow progress on her situation yet ena notices it, and she might not fully realize it but its helping ena take things easier with her art as well, which i think is shown very well in hope will someday go beyond the morning. mafuyu makes just a slightly different expression but ena still notices it, paralleled by enas art teacher noticing enas intent and emotion behind her art project. despite so many mistakes in the work on a technical level, it had soul. not to mention mafuyu indirectly helps ena be more understanding of others, which is very obvious when you compare how she was with mafuyu at first vs their current dynamic. mafuyu doesnt even know it but she inspires ena so so much not only in her art but to be better as a person.

and for mizuki, its also very obvious with main help coming from ena. pretty much every mizuki focus [<- exaggeration warning] will have ena trying her best to help mizuki out, and thanks to enas growth she can understand mizuki better and better and know how to deal with their issue. she thinks she needs to know the secret to know mizuki, but she learns that its not actually important, and she wants to show mizuki that as well. she constantly shows mizuki support and care weather they are willing to tell their secret or not, and in her own way wants to reassure mizuki that no matter what she wants to be there for them. ena helps mizuki so much that they even finally consider telling ena their secret, after like a year in canon if not longer!! which is such a huge deal because mizuki was convinced that telling ena someday they will tell what it is was completely a lie. they never had any intention to actually say what it is. but they grew so much and feel so safe around ena that the fact they even CONSIDERED IT implies so much healing, growth and trust. it makes me SOB. i am INSANE about mizuena. ena loves them SO MUCH its just so JSHSHDHYSHEIRUDHXHJSNB

okay im gonna stop here cause the tired is getting to me and i feel like i cant explain myself at all now but you get the point n25 care about eachother so much it makes me cry and punch walls and scream and drop to my knees on the floor in a dramatic way and explode and-

[cybernekos]

i wrote some personal dating hcs with tony because authors note: i can!! i had a really bad day and kept thinking alot abt this 🙏

well here we go,, dating tony,,

no warnings its just hcs lol

to clarify i was never a fancy girl. im a big tomboy. i do like to dress up at times tho :3 and i know he loves pretty fancy girls but this is what he gets >:3 tho he gets used to it after awhile. and at times when i would dress up hed get so stunned. like who is this and what have you done with her.

we bicker alot but these arent like very serious fights these are more of a "tomato is a fruit" kinda thing. tho sometimes id be right about something and he would desperately try to prove it and fail (like social interactions, coworkers crushes etc.) 🤭

as for interactions we talk ALOT. about everything. dum things, daily things, smart things (thats where he tries to explain something scientific to me ofc), our lives before we met, our life now etc. and honestly i always enjoy it 💕 esp when he explains things to me its always so interesting to see how is mind works,,

speaking of science, i ONLY go to lab when hes in it. because you never know with his inventions (or security measures for that matter). he says its fine for me to be in it as long as i dont touch anything (as hyperactive as i am he knows i can respect boundaries) but honestly i feel more safer when hes around in there LOL. sometimes i even get to sit in his lap when hes reading or doing small works <3 and its always so nice to see him enjoy doing all this,,

this guy ofc has a shitton of money but literally i am the kind of person that hates being given free gifts (not because i actually hate gifts i just feel bad LOL) and ofc he does it anyway. if he sees im having a depression episode i can expect to wake up with 5 large plush bears in our bedroom. even worse if he notices im looking to buy something, anything really and there it is under my nose the next day. i keep telling him no but he never listens on that matter </3

ofc sometimes i have to put him in his place /aff. sometimes hes quite full of himself or hes just simply being tony. tho its somewhat how we started out; i immediately told him where i stand in relationship and that some things he does will definetly have to be cut out if he wants to date me. and once i saw his better side i fell for him and he promised hed do anything 💕

and going back to science a bit sometimes hed pull out ideas from my sarcastic sentences and ofc wed bicker again sometimes </3 but i tend to give him ideas myself and hed actually take them into consideration 💕 sometimes hed even invent small cute gifts for me or things to help me out

also going back to my depressive episodes; hed get really worried about me when i go trough them. hed reasonably try to get me to keep up with hygene, to eat properly, and to go out so i could feel better. esp if i get a medical issue he goes CRAZY. even if its something not so bad. but he always makes sure i feel alright 💝 and i always do the same for him, sometimes he would feel tired maybe even burnt out or out of inspiration and id just comfort him whenever i can ^^

and again all this is very cheesy but i cant help myself 😔✊️

[d1gnan]

some thoughts abt aesthetics, the way people engage with my art so far and also stuff youll be seeing from me in the next year..

first off i wanna say im not actually educated on any of this and its all just coming from personal experience/ its kind of just a mad mans rambling

im the kind of person who is always curating, always putting like with like (on a consistently changing/personal/almost random metric that spans like any kind of media , things tangible and abstract, my memories, yadda yadda (everyone does this to some degree but as an artist and an introspective person, i find it hard to just let stuff go once i form a connection. (and im sure a lot of u guys reading this are like this too, tumblr is like The website for people like this) im hyper aware of everything that ever happens to me and im always trying to connect everything with everything else

(forgive me too in advance cause ive never been satisfied with my ability to explain myself and usually i just let everything i do speak for itself/dont bother trying. im really really visual and i usually think of things In pictures too so it just frustrates me to try and describe something thats worth a thousand words..

jewelry came pretty quickly to me as a favorite art form because its a way to convey some of what goes on in my head when i engage with the media i like , being able to turn all these pretty abstract feelings into colors shapes symbols.. a lot of times when i listen to something or watch something, i get almost itchy with the feeling of needing to get the way i percieved it out into the world in a visual and tangible way asap before it loses its original shape or before i forget how it made me feel. (dementia runs in my family so a lot of my art is trying to archive my feelings since i know i wont have them forever.. its almost a frantic need to be seen/known by others before its too late.

a lot of the jewelry ive custom made for people has been specifically music and film related, and thats been a great thing because i can both 1) make something that satisfies my own vision of the thing but 2) it is still easily readable by others as related 2 the source material because the design language usually is distinct enough to withstand being skewed too much by my own personal associations

moving forward tho, i have a TON of ideas for way more personal/abstract/highly conceptual projects, and have been slowly gathering pieces so that i can do full justice to my vision for them.

doing this has first and foremost always been an art form/way to express myself . i do it because of the ideas, i do it because i have to do it, and then im left with a bunch of stuff that i would like way more to be in the hands of someone who relates to it. and, i do it in a way thats not at all good for being a business owner. if i'm going to create a product, i would be going against my ideals if i didnt try to battle with all the things i hate about products. fast fashion and aliexpress craft supplies and mass production.. (to have a successful business you need a lot of the same product, it needs to be easy to make and you need to be able to get your materials cheap. all of which i can't and wouldn't do, so it's a very shit thing to attempt to make a living off of..

maybe this sounds a little funny too when you look at my work and then at what i have to say about it.that i think about it so seriously since it's something any one can do. my kid sister makes jewelry, it's a pretty accesible hobby. the idea of making jewelry based off of media is also the furthest thing from unique, which brings me thinking about the reception of my art online so far, and some weird stuff i've noticed.

when you're making anything that you mention is directly "inspired by" something else, you run into some pretty weird habits from others online, and a kind of unique way of engaging with "aesthetics" thats started in the past couple years. what im talking about now is less movies/music. its stuff that blurs the line between an existing body of work to reference and just a concept. ( y2k, fill in the blank-core, frutiger metro/aero).. i'm really into most eras of these fashion / design trends/aesthetics in a historian/archivist kind of way, and i really enjoy to do work inspired by things like this, but these are always way more personally influenced than anything made for a movie/music. i went semi-viral (feels so dumb to say seriously lol) on tiktok for a frutiger metro/sleepyhead by passion pit inspired bracelet.

i get hate on most posts on tiktok since its a gigantic platform(as well as praise) but the majority of comments always tend to be people correcting the authenticity to the aesthetic ive listed as an inspiration. people way smarter than me have way better things to say on this, and if i tried to go too into detail with it this post would be even crazy longer, but ive seen people call it "what aesthetic is this" culture, (some examples of this: " "this aesthetic is called this, not that" "this aesthetic is from this time frame only" xyz

i never know what to do, because i want to respond by explaining that i see these aesthetic names/labeling system solely as a tool. to help people find and connect like with like. labeling aesthetics is just recognizing a pattern. knowing the "name" of an aesthetic can help you find similar things, but there are no set time periods to any of this unless you are specifically making something that is an exact recreation of something else or making a period piece. everything comes back in some way over and over again. rigidly defining aesthetics is flawed/missing the point because aesthetics are completely individual/unmeasurable/skewed by experiences/memories/opinions. its a little different too when it comes to stuff thats actually like made For marketing cause that Will have an exact language that goes with it or whatever, but most of the time i see people arguing about an aesthetic thats not even applicable. there are genuinely no rules to what fits an aesthetic because anything you create, you add your own experiences to and are effectively continuing these patterns in a new way/ sometimes creating a whole new movement or sub category if you are really into labeling it as something directly. peoples personal art is definitely affected by their time/whatever the common design language was at the time, so thats where a lot of the names get born, but when you make it this rigid thing , "this needs to be more like this.. this needs to be more like that.." you'd be right- but only in the sense that yes, it IS that way, For You. in your mind you experience it that way, it is your personal relation to seeing these patterns. and you can use these aesthetic tools to expand on what was done before you, you can use these images to convey your own perspective so that i can try to understand it.

marketing vs personal aesthetics is a different thing that idk how to tackle with my like super limited language but for example, when someone is using a popular aesthetic to sell you something, you can tell. it's shallow and impersonal. looking back on ads that are dated and use a certain aesthetic usually tinges them with nostalgia that you can take and make into something that it wasn't because you have this priceless new angle to look at it with. if you believe in aesthetics as being this rigid thing, you dont get new ideas, you dont get new sub aesthetics, you dont get new movements, you get a copy of a copy, you get shein clothes. and! anyone can call anything they want an "aesthetic" ..any collection of things together influenced by anything in the world can be an entirely new aesthetic.. and im so sick of typing the word aesthetic

but i know that if theyre commenting something like this, they r so fundamentally different from me/ engage with the world in such a different way then i do that it would be a waste of time to try to explain..

i am a little scared when i launch some of the new projects i've been working on they'll be met with this kind of reaction. maybe ill try to write some kind of TLDR, some kind of zine to send along with any of my bracelets, some kind of manifesto about sustainability/personalization/mindful consumpution.. but it takes a long time for me to feel good about explaining myself, even this post ive deleted and restarted countless times.

ill post some more about some of the "aesthetics " (i gotta figure out better language for this shit i swear to god) ive found inspiring that have heavily influenced these upcoming projects, as well as scans from books ive collected that match the design language and i definitely want to release kind of a companion zine with the collections that include music/fashion/home photos etc...

if u have any thoughts or anything about any of this id love to hear it, or answer questions or expand on shit, this is kind of just like a word version of me throwing mac and cheese up at the ceiling and seeing if anything sticks.

thanks to anyone whos said anything nice about my stuff, i love u guys more than lyfe

and if you read all of this youre a g

💚

[rosykims]

how do you come up with your character backstories? they're all so detailed and well thought out and you always seem to have an abundance of fun and interesting trivia for all your characters as well. would you be willing to give tips to someone who has a hard time coming up with anything beyond like. the basics lol 😔👉👈

WAH THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS 🥺 i always feel a little embarrassed talking abt my ocs because i tend to start and never stop lol, and theyre all very special to me so its a sort of vulnerable extension of myself in a way. even if im only sharing with them with the lovely ppl who live in my phone its always a little stressful, so i really appreciate that they left a good impression!!

as for tips, i just wanna say as a disclaimer that i am very chronically online. ive also had multiple periods of extended free time in which ive been able to really hyperfocus on certain media and the characters i want to create within them. ALSO, a lot of my ocs ive had in development for several years and theyve just evolved naturally. ashara, for example, i made when i was 19, and im 26 now lol. ik this is cliche to hear, but i rly do think its important to go at your own pace when developing characters and do whatever makes YOU happy, before looking to anybody elses ocs , because we all have different lifestyles and creative processes and whatnot ❤️

that being said, i can def share a few things that helped me! firstly, i always start developing characters based solely on vibes and sensory stimuli, so i'd highly recommend making a pinterest moodboard for them and/or a music playlist! pinterest esp, since its such a great way to start brainstorming and getting a visual idea of what you want your character to look like/embody/represent. its a great place for inspiration in general.

secondly, one of the most important steps in developing any character is motivation. what does your oc WANT? why? what would they do to get it? should they get it? would would happen if they got it vs if they didnt? do they ACTUALLY want it or just think they do? answer those questions and you've already got a pretty solid foundation to work with. another really useful piece of advice a friend gave me several years ago was this: "what is something your character believes in at the start of their journey, that they no longer believe by the end of it?" for example, my warden oc elspeth believes in traditional heroics and black-and-white morality. by the end of dao she does not. theres a LOT to explore between point A and point B.

lastly, when i make ocs its very important to me personally that they feel inextricably TIED to the media they belong to. this is completely optional ofc, bc lots of people enjoy characters they can drag and drop into different stories, which is fine! for me though, i like taking cues from the world around them. it makes them feel natural to the plot, the setting, the canon characters, etc, because it helps me pin down some of their more hyperspecific quirks. there are a few ways to go about this.

the easiest way imo is to look at any major Core Issues within whatever media you're working with. like real life, people have OPINIONS about ISSUES and POLITICS lol, and those opinions are usually influenced by their own lived experience or personal belief system. so if you can identify a few key figures, factions or events in your story, and give your character an Opinion or Reaction to those things, it can pretty naturally be evolved into a unique and interesting backstory. to use elspeth as an example again: "elspeth dislikes orlais". thats a political opinion about a faction. and then to expand on why? "because her family/country fought in the occupation and she loves her family/country". from there we learn she's nationalistic and places value of lineage. then you could say — "she enjoys history and geography because it allows her to better appreciate her country. she cares deeply about all ferelden peoples, and has studied techniques from avaar and chasind communities". and you can keep branching out and expanding from there. and once you've exhausted that thread, move on to a diff one! "elspeth is nervous around mages". why? "because her religion tells her to and shes never thought to question it." why? etc etc etc.

alternatively, i find it really helpful to find an overlining theme in the type of media im working with/creating. sometimes its easy (baldurs gate 3 has a confirmed theme of autonomy vs authority, da4 will have a confirmed theme of regret, etc) but if its not as clear cut or your designing your own original world, its fine and great to take your own creative interpretation of things and run with it. for example, origins for me is very reminiscent of loss of innocence and war. inquisition is, to me, about personhood and losing it to your own mythology. once you've got a theme it can really help help translate into a cohesive story you want to tell and a character you want as an outlet. and since the character will be thematiclly relevant, you might also find it easier for them to connect to the cast/setting/story etc.

sorry this is so long, but i hope you gained something out of all this word salad lmao. one more thing i want to mention — its also fine to NOT do any of this. sometimes i get overwhelmed feeling like i have to come up with a unique/multi-faceted character every time i go into characterization, and virtually 100% of the time its Never that deep. if you find yourself getting stressed or overwhelmed, remind yourself that its perfectly fine to dream up a simple and straightforward character who makes you happy, and let the rest come to you as your character goes forth into the story. sometimes simplicity is best because you arent held down by the restrictions you've placed on them yet.

sending love, i hope this helped !!!!!! if you have any more questions or just want to chat, feel free to send another ask or slide into my dms ! ❤️❤️❤️

[sungbeam]

no your Eric is sososo well written you're one of the few writers that's putting me back on reading!! I literally had to send several of your works to my bestie even tho she analyzes writing a lot more and is p strict about stuff she reads (who btw said, and I quote "if this person wrote a novel, I would read it"!!^)

I feel like the fact you understand Eric's mannerisms is the reason I like it a lot; you really make a good distinction between characters and the way they act! particularly enjoyed swing my way, esp with all the other members involved!! like it's perfect, if anything I wish I could see more of what happens with them down the road because it's so cute 🥺🥺

ty for writing well~ hehe

also either of the names is fine! I mostly used ducky on tumblr but use moon more as of recently ^🫶 I also remember seeing you on tumblr when I still had an account and being like omgg another duck!! but I was too shy to say hi and then sadly went inactive and ended up deactivating LMAO if I come back I'll let you know so we can actually be moots 🫶 honestly you're inspiring me to write again/go through my old drafts but we'll see!!

- ducky/moon

awh im so happy i could help u get back into reading 😭 and raaaah ur friend's praise is much appreciated as well!! i always feel a little nervous abt my writing in fanfic just cuz i have a bad habit of not extensively editing/proofreading TT but glad she would read a book of mine 🙇🏻‍♀️

omg swing my way eric was so sjfbdjfnnf i personally think that if he wasn't a kpop idol, that's the kind of eric he would turn out to be LOL but ACTUALLY i really wanted to make a mini series w the other boyz at the country club too !! so like a fic for changmin as a dance instructor, chanhee at the spa, haknyeon in dining, jacob on the courts, and maybe the lee cousins just in general haha and then you'd see a returning cast of characters, kind of similar to love in unity!

PLS ITS OKAY 😭😭 im always super shy to say hi first as well :'))) interacting and initiating convos is scary @@ but thank u for sending that first ask anyway; hope to chat w u even more in the future !!! and i really hope u do come back, but ofc no pressure <3

[sillygreenrat]

I have some more smokeybat headcanons, got inspired now

#. Sam gets a big crush on Uzi, he wants to try impress her and hang out with her. So he tries asking her out whenever he can, Uzi oblivious to his crush agrees and hangs out with him a lot.

#. Uzi shows him anime and he ends up liking anime quite a lot, his favourite type being chill slice of life or the cooking anime. Makes him jealous they can't eat like humans can

#. He makes her a badge of their favourite anime character for her to wear on her beanie.

#. Sam is a talented artist and has a sketch book full of drawings and abstract work too. When he on magnets is when some his most colourful work is done. He has a very detailed drawing of Uzi he keeps special. It's of her in class reading, she looked so pretty that day.

#. Sam got a bit jealous when Thad started talking to Uzi , he could see Uzi seemed to like him a bit and was a little sad by that. He got more upset when N showed up because he could definitely see Uzi big crush on him.

#. He talk with Uzi about N and he encourages her to tell him how she feels, being a wingman.

#. Sam writes a love note to Uzi along with a drawing and sends it to her anonymously, hoping to impress her. He was too scared to sign it.

I have more if you like to listen to it

i am SO sorry for taking so long on these lmfao???? i really wanted to think abt these. tysm for sending me all of these delightful thoughts to grab and run with i would absolutely be willing to hear more

1 + 5: it was a crush that's been there since the begining, uzi was always kinda cute and charming, the way she interupted class with sarcastic wit on occasion, the way she would go above and beyond what the assignments were just to have her own fun. sam has always been the more quiet, shut in type, always following rules, never usually being the type to speak up or make a sound, but whenever uzi does something particularly silly he can't help but laugh a little (and boy shes a whole fucking circus so lemmie tell you). though he had to eventually start making moves once thad god involved.

for the record, i do NOT ship thad n uzi, i get it as a ship, but it just aint my thing, however im a big fan of unrequitted love, and i can absolutely see uzi just not being interested in the popular jock type (shes more into the silent stoner type COUGH COUHG(J)), seeing thad as more of a close friend due to him being so caring when no one else seemed to be.

unfortunately for sam the only time he was able to fully talk and get to know uzi was AFTER she was already introduced to his oil (lmfao)

2: this dude wants to eat so bad, let this man manifest some robot mac n cheese for his ass. its not 'hunger' but its like, some fuckin program malfunction due to the magnets that you could compare to stoner munchies but lord does he get angry when uzi puts on a ghibli or some shit and they start makin ramen or some shit.

on the topic of anime tho uzi would absolutely be into anime and try and get sam (and by extention N and possibly V) into anime

current hyperfixation is firmly beliving shes be a nutcase over jujutsu kaisen (would love the curses and their vibe of 'we wanna take over humanity' but the humans are pretty cool too she GUESSES) but i think shed also be into shit like kill la kill, evangelion, maybe even a smidge of ouran on the side bc damn it she wants to be surrounded by a buncha cute boys (and low and behold be projecting trasmasc feelings onto uzi but boy she'd feel a sense of 'man i bet i could pull off a suit' and she WOULD)

3 + 4: him being obsessed w/ drawing n stuff is honestly a small headcanon i had personally!!!!! glad its a thing for another person ugh (positive) he would totally pay attention to the characters she hyperfixates on and go CRAZY making her posters and small keychain hangers and such (probably has an old laminator in his house that he uses to seal the all to keep them from getting ruined). i like to imagine he likes to draw/paint skyscapes, trying to find really interesting cloud formations or spots where the moon shines through them to draw cuz he thinks that kinda shits beauitufl, would absolutely love earth sky's so fucking much let this man see them

6 + 7: N IS BEST WINGMAN. i ship all of them together in one homoginous poly so i can confirm this happened and it was real. would absolutely help sam before he even considered allowing his feelings for uzi show

[thebisexualdogdad]

hey, sorry if this is invasive - idk how open u are abt gender things these days. but anyway, ive been a fan of ur blog since probably 2019, maybe before? during that time period, i thought i was a transman and found some serious comfort in ur works. in times since, my gender has changed a lot. now, im essentially back to square one - what id like to ask is, how and when did u "know" u were transmasculine? ik u identify now as nonbinary, how did u know that was ur true identity? i identify somewhat with transmasculine non-binary, and id just like ur perspective from ur journey as you've been such an inspiration to me.

thanks,

A

First of all thank you for the kind words and for following me for so long!

And secondly I have no problem talking about these things because I think it's important for us to be open when it comes to identity and the way its fluid and can change, especially with all the de-transistioners on social media who took a complete left turn and are now super anti trans because thier identity changed and think gender affirming care ruined thier life.

So my identity has always been a journey, when I was a kid I never felt like a girl but no one ever told me I didn't have to be one so I spent my entire life confused and not understanding why I didn't fit in with the other girls. When I was in high school it was okay to be gay but there was so much biphobia still rampant that I told myself well I like girls more so that must mean I'm gay because you can't like both. It was when I was 18 and fully understood what it meant to be trans I was like oh shit this why I've always felt this way. I'm trans but again at that time being non binary wasn't as accepted so even though sometimes I felt in the middle ground I must be a boy because you have to be one or the other.

Around 22 is when I learned more about bisexuality and realized I liked everyone and that being bisexual wasn't a bad thing like people wanted me to think. Even though I learned about being non binary years ago it wasn't until this year when I finally stopped to think about my own identity and understood that even though I am definitely on the masculine side of the gender spectrum and not female in anyway, part of me still feels in the middle ground and that I like using they/them pronouns along with he/him so currently transmasculine nonbinary is where im at.

What I'm trying to get at is that it's okay to not understand your identity, for some people it's crystal clear and for some people it's not so clear and takes time while for some like me it's fluid and ever changing which I can't stress enough it's okay for your identity to change during different parts of your life and don't let anyone try to make you feel bad for changing your identity!

If anyone wants to share thier own journey with either thier gender identity or sexuality in my inbox please know its a safe space to do so!

[mariska]

hi queer friends in my phone i hope u have all been having an ok month so far 💖 im sorry i havent been online very much lately, its like 80% just me being forgetful except to hop on my phone app for like ten mins to browse my dash and reblog something and get distracted by another non phone related activity LOL. my bestie Eli is here still until the rest of the month and we finished our rewatch (their first watch, my like......who even knows the specific numbered rewatch) of Avatar The Last Airbender a couple days ago and that was very fun and exciting, it was wild getting to those last few episodes in the final season and just totally getting brought back to being a kid in my head when the show was actively airing on tv and i was sitting in my bedroom exploding from sheer special interest excitement watching the story wrap up on the super small box tv i used to have like 15+ years ago 😭🫡 we haven't started watching Legend Of Korra yet since we just finished ATLA and need to like. take a lil Avatar media break before jumping into another entire finished series fhdhdhsfsshhgd but excited for whenever we start that too!! Eli showed me a fav movie of theirs the other night called Thoroughbreds and i REALLY liked it, fellow toxic yuri enjoyers i truly cannot recommend that one enough those girls have Problems In Abundance and i love that for them and also me.

OH OH OH ALSO on my birthday after we got home from out of house activities we watched that Nic Cage movie 'Dream Scenario' that i've wanted to see so bad since the first trailer for it dropped online a while back, and i am truly not just being dramatic when i say i think that is my favorite movie i've seen this year and it will be Difficult for another movie to win over that 2024 Fav Spot in my mind, it was exactly what i wanted it to be and MUCH MORE LMAOO IT WAS SO GODDAMN FUNNY. very specifically Me And Eli's Kinda Stupid Sense Of Humor throughout the whole run time we were fuckin losing it at every other scene. that was a wonderful lil birthday treat.

also the antique mall we were gonna go to ended up being closed on the day of my birthday so we went to a big mall off-Cape that i like instead and have been to a few other times for past birthdays cus they actually have a bunch of different types of stores with stuff i actually enjoy unlike the more local mall we have here that is 100% dying a slow agonizing Mall Death lmao. went to Build-A-Bear and they had that one bear style in stock that literally just looks like a femme lesbian with the lesbian flag colors and perfect lil eyeliner so i made a Chappell Roan inspired pop star outfit wearing lesbian colored bear (saw someone else online do that a lil while back with the same style i chose so i couldn't resist doing it myself when i saw it was at the store hfsfgsvsgshshdg) and the ppl working there that day were all super chill and friendly and most likely around me and Eli's age or maybe a few yrs younger than us, the person who helped me make my bear specifically was really friendly and fun to talk with cus while we were in there it was pretty much just us and the employees for the majority of the time, he like immediately picked up on me being A Very Obvious Femme Lesbian on account of The Femme Lesbian Bear and also The Very Over The Top Femme Alt Outfit I Was Wearing and we chatted abt being gay and trans while he was stuffing the bear it was such a genuinely sweet and wonderful interaction, he was also autistic and we got to briefly bond over Build-A-Bear being mutual life long autistic special interests of ours and he seemed rly happy to hear that i was turning 27 that day and was still actively wanting to spend birthdays making custom stuffed animals there it was just really great all around 😭💕 also before the mall closed later on we did a quick stop at the FYE store that was there (i always get very excited when i see a still active FYE store anywhere cus it was a childhood fav place of mine to shop but our local mall closed ours when i was a teenager lol) and there was a small stand set up with some ATLA merch and i got a fully functional Momo backpack/crossbody style bag that i am so incredibly psyched about having fjdgedfdhsshfg it is very cute. and anyone who knows me knows i love adding a silly lil functional novelty bag to my collection of silly lil novelty bags. so it will be getting much use from me out in the world

anyways!!! thats pretty much what i've been up to, just figured i would hop on and write a mariska life update so everyone here knows i didnt just like. drop off the face of the earth lol