#like not that abuse is ever EXCUSED but the solution to abuse is not to force people to say

[calypsolemon]

thinking about how the expectation that parents must be completely selfless and fully willing to make sacrifices to their own quality and fullness of life in order to be good parents is actually a deeply capitalistic one, and how much it sucks that conversations surrounding parental abuse/ neglect often buy fully into this notion that a parent being unable to cope with such an inhumane lifestyle is an individual failing rather than a systemic one.

[verinarin]

what about veritas making excuses just to hold your hand ? or just to touch you in some sort of way bcs he cant ask directly

this man is a menace because he knows very well that you absolutely believes in whatever he says and he abuses that fact to the max _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): | Fluff featuring worried Veri !!

support me on ko-fi ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

You have been summoned by Veritas to help him with his newest research, ever since you accidentally broke a lot of his expensive vials you have been working for him to repay the damage, let’s be honest here you still don’t understand why the hell are those small pieces of glasses cost more than one month of your rent !

What you didn’t know on the other hand that he doesn’t care about those vials, yes they were expensive and he doesn’t mind the fact it’s broken, he was planning to buy a new one anyway, but you didn’t need to know this fact of course

You knock exactly three times on the glass door of his lab, of a sudden the door dissipates into thin air, you still don’t know what kind of magic he use for that damn door-

“Alright I’m here Veritas, what do you need me to do ?,” you huff as you see him in the corner, his brows furrowed as he concentrates on the vial that’s in his hand

“Come here and hold this for me,” he says curtly, you quickly oblige and hold his vial for him, what you don’t realise is how cold the room is, your hand starts to tremble because of the temperature “Stay still fool !,” he grunts as he holds your hand tightly with his own

He can’t help but feel something weird stirring up inside him, an annoying feeling that ails his heart, the softness of your skin against his own and the warmth it emulates, he quickly brushes the thought

His hand must be cold that’s why he enjoys the warmth of your hand instead, he justifies. You kept your mouth shut and your hand stable as he used his other hand to drop two drops of a foreign liquid he had to concoct before, however, you suddenly sneezed and the one drop of the liquid made contact with your skin

Suddenly you felt tingles around your body, Veritas quickly grabbed the vial and placed it back in safety “You’re an absolute idiot!” he yelled as he dragged your body toward his own, he swiftly examined the skin that had contracted with the liquid, you never see his this worried before

“I’m sorry t-the room w-was t-too cold,” you mutter as you keep your gaze towards the floor, you can’t help but feel like you’ve currently in an industrial freezer ever since that liquid touched your skin

“What do you feel right now ?!,” he replies as he brushes back the hair on your forehead to check your temperature, you’re ice cold this is a good sign for him, at least now he knows what you need is just a simple cup of herbal tea he could brew, all of the symptoms  you showed so far doesn’t seem to be extreme, it was a drop of a coolant solution after all

“So coold, really cold like someone just threw a bucket of cold water,” your body trembles, within a second he wraps his arm around your waist, while resting your head on his chest, “To share my body heat with yours is the most effective way to combat this,” he lies, yet you don’t need to know that do you ?

It’s all a blur from then, because somehow now you’re at his apartment his bed to be exact. Covered by layers of blanket your head rested on his chest as he holds you close, he feels like a heater underneath all of the layers he puts over you both, he feels rather awful to help you in this way but you seem to be feeling better after he brewed you that herbal tea

According to his deduction, you should feel a lot better after drinking it but you ask him to share his warmth again, he wouldn’t let the chance of being so close to you to wasted of course, “Feeling any better ?,”

“Yeah it’s warm and toasty here, I’m sorry to burden you and I hope you don’t mind the close proximity,” you huff as you look up towards him

He just sighs before smiling, “I’m actually quite fond of it now,”

He has always been fond of it ever since your hand accidentally brushed his own

[end-otw-racism]

End OTW Racism Link Round-Up: Week 1!

We are now in week two of our action demanding that OTW live up to its commitments to address racist harassment & abuse, which ends May 31st! There was a lot of great discussion during the first week, so we wanted to post a round-up of some of the longer-form discussion/analysis that people have been sharing (we're going with posts on Tumblr, Dreamwidth, and other sites, as well as Twitter threads that are longer than three tweets). These are posts that we think would be helpful to consider as fandom engages in the necessary conversations about these issues.

If we've missed something you've written, we'll be doing another round-up of week two, so it's not too late! You can either submit it on tumblr, tweet at us, or email us at endotwracism [at] gmail [dot] com. We do reserve the right to only share posts that are in line with the intent of the campaign and that we believe are adding to the conversation.

Tumblr

beatrice-otter: Why AO3 needs to be accountable for reducing fandom racism in its internal culture and the archive [link]

pretty-weird-ideas: End OTW Racism and the “Fed” Accusations [link]

aretethegreattelleroftales: You don’t understand what EndOTWRacism is asking for here, and because you clearly do not understand it, you should have known better than to speak on it. [link]

vex-verlain: In response to the reactions I’ve seen to #EndOTWRacism [link]

unrealromance: I don’t really understand how people don’t know the difference between ‘whoops I’ve fallen into a racist trope’ and 'I am literally writing hate speech that is unveiled, mask off’. [link]

pretty-weird-ideas: Codification of a Living Document as a solution to Harassment on OTW [link]

indifferentvincent: RE: End OTW Racism Derailment [link]

elumish: In light of some of the backlash to the End OTW Racism protest, and particularly the concern that an anti-harassment policy would lead to abuse of reporting mechanisms or censorship of unpopular authors/ships… [link]

seepunkrun: How to Find and Attend OTW Board Meetings [link]

indifferentvincent: The people who use the excuse of saying ao3 is an ‘archive’ and so 'must preserve’ the most vile, intentionally racist fics just sound like the most privileged motherfuckers on the planet to me. [link]

spacebeyonce & pretty-weird-ideas: wow this is such a normal and rational thing to say about having a diversity consultant to help ao3 fix their bullshit. [link]

indifferentvincent: I have to assume this is in regards to my promotion of the end-otw-racism call to action, because I don’t know what else it could be referencing. [link]

princeescaluswords: Writing Doesn’t Happen in a Void [link]

mousieta: There is a place, a magic place, a giant, ever growing park filled with sandboxes of every color and shape imaginable. [link]

Twitter

spacebeyonceart: alright so I want to talk about this post I made two years ago now that the #EndOTWRacism ball is finally rolling. [link]

generalfrings: This shit makes me so goddamn angry, yall. [link]

eruthosish: One of the calls of #EndOTWRacism is to improve the AO3's Terms of Service and how the AO3 deals with fanworks that are part of an offsite harassment campaign, so I wanted to share a story about the only time I have ever reported offsite harassment and had Abuse agree with me. [link]

buttonthemdown: They've proven they can move quickly *when they want to*, but the fact the OTW hasn't made an official statement acknowledging their lack of action and pledging to do better sends a signal they don't care about their POC fans. [link] 

Clonehub7567 Seeing the reactionary dismissals of #EndOTWRacism from white fans who pretend to care about racism is reminding me of the backlash i/we got for #UnwhitewashTBB. [link]

hydrochaeris3: ppl who are worried that not participating in the call to action will get them labeled racist..... first of all once again yall are showing that you care more about what others might label you than putting forth tangible effort into caring for a community [link]

m_sketchyart: If you think that #EndOTWRacism is censoring your escapism, here’s a thought to chew on: why is being anti-racist a threat to your escapism? Is true escapism not also leaving racism, antiBlackness, fatphobia, abeism, misogyny, etc out of your escapism? /rh  [link]

lunedraws: Have you wanted to walk the walk and not just talk the talk, re: racism, in one or more of your fandom spaces? This is a concise and timely line of actions we can take. [link]

aliasmarionette: One thing I see a lot in #EndOTWRacism comments which are in favour of the status quo is assumptions about who we mean by fandom, and about the user base of the Archive. [link]

SapphicScholar: New profile photo while participating in the important fan-led campaign to demand that OTW make good on the promises it has already made to address issues it has already acknowledged as problems in the archive—that is, instances of extreme racist harassment and abuse [link]

Fansplaining: Since the endotwracism campaign has begun, we wanted to highlight the timeline they've put together about the OTW's communications re: hiring a diversity consultant since their initial statement of commitment in the summer of 2020. [link]

gwenpendrcgon: ive seen so much backlash over #EndOTWRacism which shouldnt surprise me (also majority of this comes from tumblr is also to be expected) but most if not all backlash received by this event is done is such bad faith and complete wilful ignorance [link]

fiercynonym: so op of the #EndOTWRacism post on reddit dm-ed me and the situation is even more fucked up than i originally knew???  [link]

kitschlet: seeing a lot of people confused about what the OTW can do to address racism [link]

generalfrings: poor AO3 maintaining a 'absurdly heavy site'. all that text! [link]

RukminiPande: Fan scholars should be paying attn to #EndOTWracism. [link]

Saathi1013: The thing to notice about all the assertions that people know who's behind EOTWR is like... Okay, there are a few things, actually [link]

buttonthemdown: If you think that victims of racism need to "develop a thicker skin" you're a fucking racist [link]

mousieta: if i could have people understand one thing abt #endotwracism right now is that This issue matters not because racism makes you feel bad, or uncomfy, or squicky but because racism is actively harming Real Living Breathing Fans right now. [link]

fiercynonym: okay so…you know how OTW has been saying, when asked at meetings, that they have a budget surplus of about USD $1 million? well…manogirl & i did some digging, and it might actually be more than TWO AND A HALF MILLION USD. [link]

runpunkrun: Speaking of OTW Board meetings, if you're interested in attending, here's what you need to know [link] 

Dreamwidth

satsuma: A Chronic Habit of Avoiding Responsibility? #EndOTWRacism [link]

bcgphoenix: I have a lot of feelings about OTW and End OTW Racism as a book conservator/general preservation person, most of which verge into tl;dr territory. [link]

killabeez: Looking at past archive policies [link]

nyctanthes: End OTW Racism (Fannish Fifty #47) [link]

chestnut_pod: Be more democratic, be more autocratic, OTW [link]

Other sites

Lady’s Weblog: End Racism in the OTW [link]

The Rec Center: #384 Final Thoughts [link]

Stitch’s Media Mix: I’m Supporting #EndOTWRacism [link]

[olderthannetfic]

Watching the downfall of Wattpad is as entertaining as it is sad, tbh.

I have spent a lot of my life in fandom, starting off with a site similar to fanfic.net, then moving on to Wattpad, and finally landing on Ao3 (there was also a time when all the translated fics were coming from a site whose name started with a Q? I think it's not around anymore, though. And most of the "older" people in my fandom had started off with LiveJournal), but this is the very first time I'm seeing someone defend so callously a platform that's clearly going to hell.

The moment the mods on that similar-to-fanfic.net started going on power trips and striking down users and their stories for no reason, people began calling bullshit, both on the site and other places (at the time it was trendy to have Facebook author pages). The site went from having a team of seven mods to one of four to, as of today, a single one plus the owner of the site. Why? Because the mods were rude, didn't listen to the authors and readers, and people rightfully started being upset and leaving for better places.

With Wattpad... it's like observing someone stuck in an abusive relationship and constantly coming up with excuses as to why it's better for them to stay.

The purge happened and they were mad for about two days before they started defending the decision to implement AI to delete (random) works, with a crescendo of accusations towards people who complain their stories were deleted: "I'm sure you can contact the Wattpad Ambassadors and have your story reinstated, don't worry!" to "Surely you did something wrong" to "Why do you want pornography on this website??? Won't you think of the children????"

They're also arguing that the CEO is in the right for deleting those pesky NSFW stories, because otherwise advertisers won't buy ad spaces, and no one wants the Wattpad CEO to go hungry.

Now the site just put up an announcement about how they're going to pull the feature that allows users to DM one another, something that apparently plenty of people relied on because it helped them build friendships. As they did with the purge, people were devastated, then started coming up with half-solutions, then outright attacking anyone who dares say it was a shit idea.

I don't think I've ever seen people brigade so strongly for a site that's clearly falling apart.

--

Quizilla. Quotev lives on, but the more popular Quizilla is no more.

That's amusing. People are generally loath to move, but Wattpad has an unusual level of loyalty.

[noangeleither]

"fixing" the panic attack scene to be more platonic ™

im extremely active on twt and have been noticing a sydcarmy tweet go viral multiple times a week (like w thousands of interactions its crazy), and its really great to see how much people love and see it for this ship. recently carmys panic attack scene went viral again, and naturally, some ppl gave their piece about how we are all dumb for interpreting it as romantic. that sydney represents his love for his job or his duty to the restaurant (*sigh*).

this scene imo, is the most concrete proof of this ship. i can excuse (not really) interpreting every interaction between them thus far as platonic but this scene....i just refuse. this is gonna be a long post, not analyzing the scene per se because i can't possibly say anything that hasn't already been said but more "fixing" the scene to fit the narrative of antis, and i hope in doing so really shows there's no other way to interpret this scene as other than romantic. again its gonna be a long post bc im just ranting and i think i will lose my mind if i dont type this out.

lets go.

so first off i like to think of this scene as an equation/experiment. simply a problem that needs to be solved.

problem/reason of panic = ...we will discuss this...

solution # 1 = claire -> failed

solution # 2 = sydney -> worked.

Problem/Reason

s02e09 opens up with carmy and claire finally consummating their relationship, with an interesting song choice might i add and carmy dissociating, looking sad, or broken (???) after. because many have said carmy pulling memories of sydney from his psyche to calm down have to do with work i always remember that, it really doesnt make any sense?

carmy is clearly having a panic attack due to him not being "fixed" as soon as he made it official with claire. he felt pressure from his family both currently and in the past to date claire because she is amazing and perfect. add mikey also being a part of that crowd, and carmy so desperately trying to connect with him when he cannot, is why i think he looks so despondent after that scene. i truly think he thought he would be a changed person after everything with claire and when that didn't happen he flipped...

we know this is the reason bc his panic attack starts with their sex scene and the lyric "I dont know" from strange currencies by REM.

this isn't to say that he isn't nervous or stressed about the soft open but its clear that he's not having a panic attack about work nor have we ever seen him have a work-related panic attack (correct me if I'm wrong). in s1 he has one or two due to him greiving his brother.

platonic fix: To make it about work I would have added scenes like when Carmy started that stove fire in braciole, his meltdown in review, some scenes of his horrible time at EMP, and him grieving his brother. i think these would represent his fear of failure, falling back into old toxic habits pertaining his career, the fear of fostering a toxic work environment like the ny chef and also the idea of "failing" mikey

but theres a reason why none of this occurs bc its not about his job or the opening of the bear. this is explicitly about his personal and romantic love life.

Solution # 1 : Claire

carmy proceeds to try and calm down by thinking of claire through literal rose-coloured glasses...

the music is distorted, he's thinking of his abusive family, he remembers every one pushing him to date claire bc shes a #goodthing.

again...this is not about his job and wouldnt make sense to think of sydneys place in his work life as a soultion to his clear personal problem....

platonic fix: in the story of carmys love life claire and sydney act as narrative foils. they have been compared and contrasted for all of s2. my platonic fix for this would be making the NY chef this first "solution" of a work-related panic attack. he represents a horrible time in his life but also represents a time when carmy was at the height of his career. when carmy gets locked in the walk in and has his monologue, its alluded to that he will revert back to that mind set in order to not let everyone down.

NY chef abused him for so long, it makes sense that carmys psyche would readily go back to his insults and the time he himself was an isolated 'psycho' bc it yielded results.

nothing is black and white and i DO think sydney represents a healthier approach to the toxic mess that is the culinary world and does represent that for carmy. if the show was invested in that, sydney and the NY chef could be overtly contrasted like sydney and claire have been.

BUT again this isnt about his job and dedication as a chef...thus why he tries to think of claire to solve his personal problem, and it fails.

Solution # 2: Sydney

LMFAOOO.

carmy then in a crazy plot twist starts thinking of his platonic work bestie sydney adamu....the love song dedicated by the show to his relationship with his girlfriend is then made clear highlighting some pretty damning lyrics about desire and love.....all platonic btw. yes you are dumb if you think otherwise (*wink*)

I actually have two platonic fixes for this...

platonic fix # 1: if we only wanted to focus on sydney as a person who calms carmy down because shes his work bestie who represents his responsibilty to the bear and the postive change they are trying effect in the culinary world, i would add scenes where they are...you know actually cooking???

i think its pretty crazy how the memories carmys immediately jump to are ones that have little to do with their jobs. when they first meet (would also like to note that when carmy first laid eyes on Sydney, he forgot she was there for a job, so this is his raw reaction to seeing a pretty girl lol) and when she comes back after she quit and their break up fight.

i would add their scenes in carmys kitchen (even tho this is extremely damning bc they were flirting DOWN - they don't make this easy at all). this represents their collaboration skills and the way they WORK and bounce ideas off of each other seamlessly. specifically the scene about him wanting to give her a star, representing his duty to her and the restaurant.

*and no shade to carmy but if his responsibility to the bear/syd as a co-worker was bothering him this much and calmed him down wouldn't he have just immediately called the fridge guy.....anyways*

platonic fix # 2 (the best one): if i was chris storer and joanna calo and i REALLY wanted to sell it that carmy isnt in love with sydney then i would put every single member of the OG beef crew + Nat to calm him down not just Sydney.

im talking to them laughing at family, carmy giving tina his chefs knife, richie in his new suit, carmys one on one w Marcus/trying his donut, nat telling carmy shes pregnant (signifing rebirth/wanting to rid all the toxic abuse from his family), carmy trying sydney risotto, and her face when he said it was tremendous etc etc...you get the gist

and honestly?

even as i type this out im tearing up a little bit bc that would have been really beautiful. carmy is changing. he can and is getting rid of old toxic habits from his family and the mess that is the culinary industry. things are changing for the better....that would be beautiful....IF his panic attack was about any of these things lol.

and to even look at this scene without this need for symmetry and we entertain the idea of carmy thinking about his job as a solution for his personal problem...carmy has said himself (s02e01) that this isnt fun for him. i dont think that means he hates cooking i kinda disagree with the ppl who think he isnt passionate about it. i just think currently its something that doesnt bring him joy but i do think its something hes starting to or at least could have started to enjoy if he just committed to working with syd...

conclusion

theres a lot of....delusion? denial? straight up bias? yes all of that, going on.

idk what is happening bc this show is really great at being subtle. but i dont know whats more in your face, dumbed down, even a toddler could understand, than this scene. if you dont come out of this understanding that carmy is falling in love/currently in love with Sydney...and i hate using this term..but you just arent media literate.

bonus: bc it makes me laugh and connects the purpose and solutions.

i think we need a Snyder Sydcarmy Cut™ of bolognese and omelette.

the start of the episode is when sydney and carmy fight over claires inclusion in the menu, and also when sydney randomly asks him to define his relationship with Claire. the episode would continue until we get to the table scene.

i think its WILD how as soon as Sydney asks him to define their relationship, carmy starts calling claire his girlfriend. then the show proceeds to insert sydney in their romantic montage, shows her tattoo about heartbreak and someone getting in the way of your relationship...THEN proceeds to have carmy compare these two women in his mind and only calms down after seeing Sydney.

i could talk about this scene for AGES. wheres the straitjacket....

[qweerhet]

i do think that the abolitionists who cling to the "it's simple, just kick abusers/assaulters/rapists/murderers out of the community" line are just... usually people who have never had the experience of someone they deeply, deeply care for, someone they have committed their life to, committing serious and egregious harm. (that, or they have, and like anti-abortion folks who get abortions for themselves when push comes to shove, they come up with narratives about how their situation was the most singular and special situation in the entire world, and nothing else like that could ever happen to anyone else.)

but like... when you run into that situation IRL, you generally find it's not ever as simple as kicking someone out, or rolling up with your crew and beating them until they promise to move somewhere else. they have complex relationships within the community, some of which aren't going to be willing to cut them off entirely no matter what they did. family relationships--regardless of biology, "family" in the broader sense of "chosen bonds of unconditional love and lifelong commitment"--are notably often capable of weathering severe strain, and that can include shit like "you're still my sister even if you murdered someone."

and people who commit harm IRL have complex and multifaceted reasons for committing that harm, some of which can be systemic in nature. this isn't to say that the harm doesn't exist, or that their actions are excused or justified by those reasons, but when you have an intimate relationship with someone and are privy to the complexities of the situation, those reasons do often materially complicate situations beyond just "beat the villain up and save the victims." if the serious harm someone is enacting is materially pressured by systemic factors, it's incredibly unlikely that it will change or stop if they're forced to move cities and cut off from their former relationships. in fact, when we're talking about abuse and trauma that's partially enacted due to material systemic pressure, it's more likely that someone will become even more unstable and volatile when forced to rebuild their life, and continue to enact even worse harm due to their decreased supports and increased vulnerability.

like... we're all damn well aware that when we, as abolitionists, talk about this shit, we're not talking about jeff bezos. we're not even talking about joe smith two neighborhoods over with a six-figure salaried position and a 401k that he started in the 70s. we're talking about the people in our abolitionist communities, who are victim to generational poverty, who are usually disabled, trans, nonwhite. we're people who don't have the option to just find a new job and start over in a new city one day. and we're people who exist at the nexus of intense, violent societal pressures pushing us to harm one another, to use what little hierarchical power we can get against each other, to commit real and lasting violent harm. that shit is complex in reality. that shit isn't addressed by a pithy "kill your local rapist" patch or a tweet questioning why anyone's still talking to [insert transfem who abused someone here].

and like. it's hard! it's upsetting and difficult and miserable to get into the weeds of "why did someone do what awful thing they did and how do we actually materially reduce the likelihood of that happening." because the answers usually don't involve forcing them to move or forcing everyone who speaks to them to cut them off or beating them, in reality, and even though those answers feel good and feel like real solutions, they're not only unrealistic, they also usually actually make future harm of the same kind more likely. and it's hard to wrap our heads around the fact that people will continue to hurt each other in profoundly horrific ways until we learn to dismantle the systems enabling that harm and heal the dysfunction within individuals that makes them feel like that harm was justifiable and necessary. that sucks. but in the end, i think it's the only... realistic way forward? because the ~just kick em out~ ~just kill em~ line is so, so ungrounded in reality.

[nose-nippin-fun]

Hazbin Hotel Episode 4 Discussion:

I’ve seen a lot of nasty posts floating around today criticizing Vivzie and the show. I’m not here to discredit your feelings, but I think that the darker tone of episode 4 merits some constructive discussion beyond a knee-jerk, pearl-clutching reaction.

From what I’ve seen, the biggest complaint from viewers, myself included, is that this emotional episode with some fairly intense depictions of SA/r*pe was not prefaced with a content warning aside from the usual small text in the top left corner. I truly do believe Amazon should correct this going forward so that viewers can feel better prepared for tone shifts between episodes. That being said, here are my defenses of the show.

Hazbin Hotel has had a huge fan following since the pilot release back in 2019, which set the tone of the show. Between the pilot and Addict music video, people had a pretty clear indication of the adult themes that would be present in the project moving forward. The show is set in Hell, the place where the world’s worst sinners are trapped in the afterlife. This is not an excuse, this is an explanation. There are going to be several characters with tainted morality, some of whom are irredeemable. That’s why they’re in Hell. This show is not meant to glorify sins, but to shine a light on flawed, relatable characters who will grapple with ethics and other struggles and come out changed in the end.

“I can’t believe Angel doesn’t leave his situation and stays stagnant.” Have you ever lived through/witnessed abuse? It is never this easy to sever ties with an abuser. They position themselves in power to control and manipulate, and many times, it’s not physically safe to get away from them. Also, this has been ONE EPISODE, you cannot expect a character with deep trauma to be totally different after a 20-30 minute episode. Angel’s character arc will take time, but his interaction with Husk at the end is an important first step in that direction.

“So Angel is supposed to just get over his trauma because he and Husk sang a song about it?” No. If that was your takeaway, I’m truly sorry you missed the point. Husk is the only person who’s been raw and blunt with Angel (on screen) about dropping the Angel Dust persona and being Anthony. Angel is used to having to put on a flawless, sexy act at all times, so much so that that’s how people really believe he is at all times. Husk sees through this mask Angel developed to protect himself and tell him through their song that imperfect and broken as he feels, Angel isn’t alone in struggling with feelings of powerlessness and addiction. He’s not comparing his loss of overlord status to Angel’s horrible SA, he’s finding common ground and empathizing (the best way a Hellbound soul can). This song wasn’t a solution, it was a gateway to vulnerability and the beginning of change for both characters.

“We’re expected to just ship Huskerdust after Angel has done nothing but sexually harass and push Husk’s boundaries?” No. That’s absolutely the wrong reason to ship anything. While it’s true that in the first three episodes, Angel sees Husk as eye candy who might be able to distract him from his suffering, episode 4 brings a necessary shift in their dynamic. Angel is used to everyone around him wanting Angel Dust, the pornstar. But for the first time, someone doesn’t want that coveted persona, and he can’t comprehend this. Angel has no control over anything except the act he keeps up, so he clings to it as a false sense of power. It’s only after Husk tells him that he likes Angel for everything he is off camera that Angel starts to treat Husk with respect, which will pave the way for any future Huskerdust shipping.

You don’t have to agree with what I’ve written, and I absolutely don’t blame you if you’ve realized this show is not content you can comfortably consume, but please understand that depicting difficult material is not the same as glorifying or excusing it. This episode was hard for me too, because I care about Angel Dust, and I am so eager to watch his growth as the show continues. My heart goes out to anyone struggling from triggering this episode caused. I hope you’re able to safely navigate away from this show while respecting the viewers who continue to watch.

[shipping-isnt-morality]

I was frankly shocked the first time I discussed the Shoah with Israelis (rather than American Jews). There was a level of… I don’t know what to call it but victim-blaming, that I wasn’t sure how to handle. That’s of course not universal but the very fact that that’s an accepted viewpoint in Israel is kind of telling I think. For example there was even some scandal on the right in America when Ben Shapiro suggested that arming the Jews (more) would have prevented the Holocaust. In Israel that viewpoint is quite common.

There’s a kind of scorn among some Zionists for victims of the Holocaust, and if you really understand their point of view it’s easy to see why. If anti-Semitism is inevitable and incurable, if the very presence of Jews brings it about, then they should have fought harder, or at least left sooner. They should have known better than to ever think they could be welcome or safe in their home. It’s almost an exoneration of the anti-Semite; like a force of nature, he is inevitable and inexhaustible.

Not to always bring everything back to what I know, but it reminds me of how we talk about abusers and victims. These posts about protecting yourself from attackers in your car, in a parking lot, in your home, on a boat, whatever: They take for granted that you can not and should not feel safe in these places. They treat the danger of sexual predators the same as the danger of wildlife. Zionists talk about anti-Semites in a similar way, I’ve noticed.

Lord knows in many cases these are born from trauma. It’s no surprise that victims of serious violations would like to know how to protect themselves from it ever happening again and would want to protect others from the same.

The problem is that this trauma-informed response cannot actually fix the root of the problem. Neither anti-Semitism nor male sexual violence are forces of nature. They are byproducts of exploitative and imperfect systems run and populated by highly imperfect humans. Different systems have had different outcomes, though, some better than others, and recently some quite well indeed. Systemic solutions to these problems - at the least, to greatly reduce them, and to make justice more accessible - do exist. Humans can and have built them.

A systemic solution to the problem cannot start with the victim, though. It has to start with the perpetrator. It has to ask why the system keeps producing people who can and would do this. It has to ask what the perpetrator wants, why they want that, and why they think harming someone else will get them what they want. Simplistic, spiteful, or dehumanizing answers to these questions aren’t helpful; neither are trite or fatalistic ones. Only truthful, consistent, verifiable, rational answers will allow us to change the circumstances which lead to these crimes.

The victim is rarely in a position to change that system, or even to change the circumstances of a single abuser; on a personal level it makes sense to treat the threats as inevitable. On a societal level, though, it is essential that we recognize the perpetrators as rational actors who are fully responsible for their actions and whose excuses must be challenged.

Ideologically it is completely backwards to start from an assumption that it is up to the actions of a victim to avoid victimization. It is infinitely easier for perpetrators, who are after all themselves rational actors and members of our society, to choose a different action which does not victimize someone else. And where possible it is our role as a community to make better choices more accessible, and to punish exploitative behavior.

Because a victim-led initiative, at worst, would result in avoiding victimization through in turn becoming victimizers of a different, even more marginalized group. It recreates the problem: the victim cannot feel safe because the only defense they can conceive is one which never puts them in the position to be victimized ever again, but there is no battle to be won against the entire system. So a smaller battle is chosen, and a weaker opponent singled out (and rhetorically aligned with the systemic danger and hostility), and the exploitation dance happens again, one level down.

I’m hardly the first to observe this. This is probably a clumsy rephrasing of common philosophy examining human exploitation.

But the point is: all of that makes sense as a protective coping mechanism for the victim, but as a society it must not be where our analysis begins or ends. On a societal level this exploitation is not omnipresent, inevitable, or inexhaustible. The perpetrators are in our society as much as the victims are; an uncomfortable fact that I think people need to grow up about.

Our solutions can, should, and must look at why this happens and what we can do about it. The answer is not “nothing”. We have accomplished extraordinary things as a species. We have concepts of justice, of empathy. We have written documents of shared humanity, we have demonstrated shared humanity - for better and for worse. It is possible for us to find answers to these brutally difficult questions.

Palestine must be free, and Jews must be safe. These imperatives are not mutually exclusive. Those who tell you otherwise have something to gain from your fear.

[theerurishipper]

Every now and then I still see arguments about how "Chat Blanc and Ephemeral were meant to inform us that Adrien couldn't take part in the final battle," the implication here being that there is no possible way for Adrien to ever react in a convenient manner to this news, and that his only reactions could be "he loses control and goes berserk," or "he gets controlled by his dad." I have already expressed my views on these takes, which is that they are excuses and justifications for bad writing. But I still feel that in trying to insinuate that they are valid explanations for Adrien's inability to be part of the finale, the point of those episodes is missed, and I'll elaborate on why they aren't even good excuses now.

Despite what Thomas Astruc may suggest on Twitter, that the problem is not with Adrien in these episodes. As evidenced by episodes like The Collector and even the aforementioned Chat Blanc, Adrien is perfectly capable of fighting his father. The issue that presents itself in these scenarios isn't that Adrien can't control himself and can only react poorly, it's that Gabriel chooses to hurt his son. None of these situations happened because of anything Adrien did, they happened because Gabriel manufactured the situation into something that he could use to gain control over his son.

The issue here isn't that Adrien finding out makes him react poorly (which is a hot take of its own), the issue is with how he finds out. In both Chat Blanc and Ephemeral, Gabriel manipulates the situation to his advantage. He knows Adrien's identity before Adrien knows his or even knows that his own identity has been compromised. Gabriel is in control of all the information, and he engineers the situation to cause the most traumatic reaction in Adrien so that he can exploit it and take advantage of Adrien's distress. The issue here isn't Adrien's reactions, it's the fact that Gabriel is in control. By framing the message of Chat Blanc and Ephemeral as proof that Adrien can only react poorly to Gabriel's revelations and abuse and using that as an excuse to justify him sitting out the conclusion to his own arc is bafflingly weird to me.

And it just ends up sending the message that Adrien is apparently "too emotionally immature" or whatever the salters say, and therefore he can't ever find out about his father, or it'll only cause disaster. The blame for not being able to walk out of the situation and continue fighting the good fight with no negative effects whatsoever is placed on Adrien by insinuating that it's some inherent flaw in him that he'll never overcome, rather than acknowledge that things only happened the way they did because Gabriel specifically manipulated events and information to achieve his desired outcome. Rather than blame the abuser for his actions, the blame is placed on the victim for his reactions. That's not good.

And it ends up with the alarming implications that abuse victims are irrational and too emotional and are to blame for their reactions instead of it being the abuser's fault for driving them to this point, which is some gross abuse apologia. Indeed, the finale of Season 5 takes this one step further by having Marinette lie to Adrien about his father, because knowing would surely have him react in ways that are inconvenient for herself and everyone else to deal with (this is the writers' motivation, not Marinette's). And we can't have Adrien's trauma matter other than when it is beneficial to Marinette, now can we?

But I digress. Back to my point.

There is a simple solution to the problem of Gabriel taking advantage of Adrien. Since the issue is that Gabriel is able to manufacture the situation to his advantage because he gets to know all the information beforehand, have a reversal of that and have Adrien find out first. Have Adrien find out that his father is Monarch first, and that way, he'll have time to process everything and react to it with the support of his loved ones before he goes to fight his father with clarity and asserts his freedom. It would be a great extension of Adrien's arc of reclaiming his agency and freedom from Gabriel to have him be in control of the situation while Gabriel is blindsided.

A part of Adrien's arc is about finding relationships in which he has unconditional love and support. Have those come into play as he confronts Gabriel. Have them actually matter. There are so many ways to do this.

Have Marinette be present alongside him and have her be able to support him in a meaningful way as he faces down his father.

Have Felix prove he cares for Adrien by telling him the truth about his father and his amok.

Have Nathalie actually support Adrien by letting him know important stuff and giving him his amok back.

This is a non-exhaustive list, but my point is that there are so many ways to override the very specific situations that were present in Chat Blanc and Ephemeral and tilt the scales in Adrien's favor. It would be a better way to deal with this than to just dismiss the point of those episodes by making it seem like the problem lies with Adrien and his reactions than the fact those things only happened because of Gabriel's specific manipulations.

But there is one very simple solution to this whole issue, and it is right there in Season 5 itself. There is proof written straight into the show that Chat Blanc and Ephemeral are not the status quo. See Marinette giving into Gabriel's threats in Chat Blanc and contrast that with her going up against him and defying him outright in Pretention in a way more personal confrontation. The difference between the two episodes is that Marinette is allowed to grow. She is allowed to develop as a character and prove that she is different from the Marinette who gave into Gabriel's threats. So if she is allowed to change and develop as a character and react differently, then why can't Adrien?

Adrien's major problem in any of these situations is that Gabriel is a controlling asshat. To ensure that these situations do not happen, Adrien needs to break free from Gabriel. I posit that the easiest way to allow Adrien to not react in ways that "don't end well," is to allow him to grow and develop as a character. It would allow him to start truly breaking free of his father in such a way that when the time comes for the final confrontation, Adrien is not so easily susceptible to his manipulations and can fight back against him. It would allow him to have agency in the situation that he did not have at the times Chat Blanc and Ephemeral took place.

But unfortunately, the writers did not want to give Adrien growth and development and agency, because that would mean making him something other than Marinette's prop and love interest. That also seems to be the point of the amok rings, since their only relevance in the story is to make up a reason so that Adrien cannot go against Gabriel and needs Marinette to do it for him, and the show presents this as some great quandary to which there is no discernable solution other than simply removing Adrien from the battle altogether so that Marinette can complete his arc for him. And it sucks.

In conclusion:

[screamingfromuz]

So, in the past few days (and weeks, and months, and years... any time that a Palestinian or Palestinian adjacent entity commit violence), people immediately go: "what did you accept? Israel has been abusing Palestinians, denying them their rights, why would they not turn to violence?" and this completely understandable. desperate people do desperate stuff. And although I completely agree with the notion, and often talked about how offering more funds to Palestinians and releasing the chock hold is the solution, there is something that often go unmentioned, mostly in pro-Palestinian circles.

and that is that Israel learned that any freedom given to Palestinian does not mean peace, but death. I mentioned it in a vary emotional post yesterday, but during the 90's anti peace movements took the idea of peace talks very harshly and increased attacks against Israelis. Israelis in turn were terrified that letting Palestinians hold weapons will mean deadlier attacks. and they were not wrong. in the four years after the accords death toll doubled, and people started naming the victims "peace victims". 'Peace with Palestinians' became not a chance for a better world, but a code word for death and destruction.

some of us remember the second Intifada, where Palestinian Terrorist groups took advantage of the freedoms they were given through the accords to attack and murder people. back in 2006 I saw a report that showed how supplies are getting rerouted not to feed and care for civilians, but to build bombs and missiles. Israel learned that without the chock hold that was slowly killing Palestinians but limiting the resources of the terrorist groups, there will be only more dead Israelis.

and so during the years, this mindset stayed, getting to a peak with the current right wing coalition. the only solution to Palestinian terror is to strengthen the choke hold until there is nothing left. this of course gave Hamas and their likes more sway over the people, recruiting more and more desperate people. Each incident used as an excuse to squeeze the Palestinians more, less money, more army surveillance. and the spiral continues.

now, because people need things spelled for them- non of it is or ever was ok, but that was the situation. an anti peace extremist will do something, the other side retaliate and more people will get hurt. this was a lose lose situation with a resolution many of us were trying to avoid- and we failed.

[wildgeese98]

Some of my favorite tma episodes that don't get talked about much.

mag 36 Taken Ill: One of the most horrifying Corruption statements ever. First appearance of John Amherst and an early appearance of the Hunt dream team, Trevor and Julia. Also sets up Melanie's father's fate two whole seasons later.

mag 44 Tightrope: first Gertrude statement. Statement giver became a doctor so he could try to understand the Stranger creatures he saw in the "freak show" tent. There's something so horrifying about spending your life trying to understand something you saw as a child, to the point where it influences your career and it just leads you to realize that what you saw can't be explained.

mag 45 Blood Bag: Mosquitos suck all of the blood out of a guy because he sold his lucky syringe, enough said there I think.

mag 52 Exceptional Risk: Something I think Jonny is very good at is writing from the perspective of shitty cops. The statement giver spends the whole time both bragging about and excusing his abuse of the prisoners under his care. He readily admits to using excessive force but has a million reasons why it's necessary. Also it's clear that the system fully allows and encourages it, until they come under any kind of scrutiny of course. He's just such and believable character, awful in such a mundane, true to life way. It's one of those episodes where the the supernatural element is not the most horrifying part by a long shot.

mag 53 Crusader: Love the voice actor for the statement giver, his performance makes an already harrowing story that much more upsetting. The description of the man burning alive inside the tank really got to me. Also introduces the concept of the ancient Archivists which is really fun and I wish had been explored more. Love a shuffling, empty husk that's not allowed to die.

mag 60 The Observer Effect: I am genuinely so afraid of seeing something lurking behind me in my reflection. This one really creeped me out. Really considering what it would be like have something watching you all the time makes my skin crawl. I'm not that surprised she tried to blow up the Institute.

mag 99 Dust To Dust: There's just something about the vibe of this one. The Dust Bowl is such a perfect setting for a Buried statement. All that dirt causing so much destitution and suffering while in turn having been caused by people overworking the land trying to "build their fortunes". Lungs full of dirt is also just such and awful way to die. Also Gertrude mispronouncing Boise always sends me.

mag 113 Breathing Room: Gotta love a Dekker statement. More than on of the End statements manage to hit precisely onto one of my very specific ongoing anxieties. Every couple months I become convinced that there is a carbon monoxide leak in my apartment. I'm also obsessed with the detail that the blood of people of die of carbon monoxide poisoning is cherry red. Plus love that Dekker's solution was straight up just a good old fashioned lobotomy.

mag 123 Web Development: I love when Jonny dips into his old school internet horror roots. Chelicerae really sounds like a creepypasta that an older kid tells you about on the playground. I am also obsessed with a guy who is so much of a pushover that he refuses to stop working for an evil website that turns people into spider monsters because he doesn't want to rock the boat.

mag 148 Extended Surveillance: In retrospect this feels like a Protocol case to me. A guy fusing with the computers and cctv system, yeah I've heard that one before.

mag 183 Monument: It's interesting that this one doesn't get a lot of play because it is essentially the thesis statement on why Smirks 14 was a deeply flawed system and why any attempt at categorizing the Fears will inevitably fail. It's also got some great Helen moments and a very good Jon/Martin conversation at the end.

mag 159 Adrift: Simply for Jon and Basira's conversation.

[clangenrising]

i think the hate comes from the fact she still does try to justify/excuse Razor, despite hearing from many cats how horrible he was to them. like we know he is an abuser and a rapist. she thinks it's bizarre/odd/whatever that his rape victim (Scorch) calls the idea of him being sweet and caring 'nightmarish'. brother or not, he is emotional, physical and sexual abuser, and she still seems to find it weird that cats dont… tolerate him in the slightest. that does rubs as rape/abuse apologism bc 'he was nice to ME and he is MY FAMILY, he would NEVER do something like that..' soo many irl families have sadly ('no way my son could had possibly violated someone. this bitch is clearly lying and trying to ruin our family' type of shit you know)

like yeah having to live for months with people (cats) who killed your family member celebrated it is harsh, i do give her that ofc. on top of her kitten crash and being more or less forced to tend them or else, and she is in no good shape to properly accept and internalize the Shadow Truth. but many people irl dealt with people like her, trying to bend over and backwards to justify their family members and friends, even after coming in contact with those who were deeply hurt by them.

That is a good point, I see where you're coming from. Clearly you've been very hurt by this kind of thing in the past and I hope nothing I've done made you feel more hurt.

I was just surprised because Mystique isn't like, for example, a parent who makes excuses for a son who has been accused of sexual assault and insists that he's totally innocent despite evidence to the contrary. She's a victim too, even if she was never physically or sexually assaulted by Razor. All of her denials aren't meant to hurt the victims or protect Razor, they're to protect herself from the terrifying reality of her situation. Does that make what she did right? No, and I don't think I've ever said that, but I do think it makes it less deplorable.

As well, its not like Scorch has told her "he assaulted me." Scorch is VERY private and so that stuff isn't public knowledge. I feel like there might be some projection on to her because of information the audience has that she doesn't. As far as killing Smokyrose, that was framed to the city cats as a casualty of war, not the murder of a peace negotiator, and to her is similar to if say, Razor were a cop who shot somebody. We obviously would find that terrible but from her conservative point of view that's just his job, to protect the city from dangerous cats with lethal force if necessary. When she got to the Clans that became more complicated for her and she's hasn't ever once claimed Razor was in the right to kill her.

What she did ask for was that the fight be solved peacefully. As far as she knows, the Clans are blowing Razor's actions out of proportion and jumping to killing him when there could have been a different solution. Like, imagine if you went to a village and everyone there was like "your brother is an evil murderer" and then failed to present you with any substantial evidence. Who would you want to believe, the strangers ready to kill him or your brother who has only ever been good to you and everyone you know (or at least, you've rationalized his behavior to believe that's the truth, lied to your self enough that you believe it)?

This isn't to trivialize what you went through or excuse real life cases of people who deny heinous acts. This is simply to say, I feel like anyone who hates Mystique isn't engaging with the entirety of the story I'm telling. I understand, though, that this could be because of a defensive reaction and I don't mean to put any blame on someone who might be feeling that way. This is a complicated topic and its possible for neither party to be the bad guy in this situation.

[ming-sik]

My dear good comrade in the trenches against AoB's nonsense: I'm having Ferdinand thoughts (derogatory, mostly) and stewing. You said you thought Ferdinand's boring, if you would be up for it we could complain to hell and back about him T_T (aka, I remembered someone saying “Lestilaut's bad and he doesn't even have [Ferdinand's] trauma excuse!” as if... trauma... is an excuse for... anything... also did we forget the system was inherently abusive and traumatizing orrrrrrr)

i'm always up to complain about ferdinand. i swear i tried to like aob's golden boy but he just... is bad.

like ok my main problem with him is honestly just that by being the most perfectest bestest coolest guy ever he makes the story so fuuuuuuucking boring. there are so many potential conflicts especially from part 4 onward that just get completely ironed over with "ferdinand took care of it offscreen" or "literally as soon as the problem was introduced ferdinand already had the solution", half of the remaining conflicts are just getting ferdinand to stop being an asshole long enough to easily solve the conflict, and half of the conflicts left over after that are how to stop ferdinand from being so incredibly selfless that he burns himself out solving all the story's problems before they can go anywhere interesting. it'd be one thing if he existed in a story that wasn't trying to be serious or if he was used very sparingly as a hermit whose help was difficult to acquire or came at a high price, but as it is i can't even bring myself to get that invested in new conflicts because aob's world has been mostly converted into a playground for rozemyne and ferdinand to flex their enormous brainpower over because obviously the only thing more interesting than one ridiculously overpowered protagonist whose only flaw is being too self-sacrificing is two of the damn things.

to which the counterargument is obviously "noooooo ferdinand isn't a perfect angel, he's deeply flawed!" and yeah he is, but not in a way the narrative is at all interested in doing anything but glorifying. i love it when characters are deeply flawed unpleasant assholes, but only if 1) that's taken in an interesting direction and 2) the story doesn't lie to my face and pretend everyone loves them. YS's society is systematically and inherently abusive, which means that every noble we meet is dealing with an intense web of motivations and pressures that mean being a "good" person in yurgenschmidt's nobility is basically impossible, but ideally that's a way to set up interesting tragic characters, not a reason i'm supposed to excuse ferdinand(and only ferdinand) from judgment for perpetuating that abuse and call for the execution of anyone who thinks he's an asshole.

and the counterargument to that is "oh it's not the narrative that thinks ferdinand is perfect, it's rozemyne!" but that's objectively wrong. the entire plot point of ferdinand's marriage to detlinde is when the story just spends basically an entire volume repeatedly telling the audience that ferdinand is actually the only reason anything gets done in ehrenfest ever and he's the most wonderfulest person ever and everyone is overcome with grief that their savior is gone. even sylvester's habit of pushing off work seems to exist basically entirely so we can have the literal archduke be hugely reliant on ferdinand for day-to-day work just so he can get a little extra credit.

that's not to say that he and rozemyne aren't massively codependent. they are. and again i understand that ferdinand doesn't intentionally put rozemyne in a position where he's literally the only person she can fully trust and she's both completely reliant on him for guidance and terrified of losing him, he does do that. he claims he wants her to rely on wilfried but outside of trying to train him to be more competent(unsuccessfully) he doesn't actually do anything to achieve that, and he never thinks of the perhaps more sustainable option of trying to get her an actual support network. a lot of the tragedy of her losing her life in the lower city is that originally she had a wide group of people to trust: she had her family for comfort, benno for guidance, and lutz as a peer who also knew the full story of her reincarnation. afterwards, she only has ferdinand, and the paranoia he teaches her prevents her from trying to find anyone else, to the point that she only realizes that elvira knows about her commoner origins when he's leaving! and. again. i get so hard that this is an understandable result of ferdinand's trauma making him extremely insular, it's in character, but it's also really, really something that i want the story to, at some point, actually interrogate, but it doesn't! even when ferdinand is totally for real ripped away during the marriage plotline, he actually isn't because they stay in contact the entire time and then she has an excuse to come rescue him and post-battle he's literally just back on the team and it's like he never left so that ended up having the same emotional impact as if he just moved to the next town over. so he never really "leaves", and rozemyne never has to actually get used to life without ferdinand, which would've been really interesting and a way to actually deliver on the ticking time bomb that is grooming subplots.

which he is! and to be clear, he's a groomer in the general sense, not even specifically the pedophilic sense(although yknow. he is explicitly pro-child marriage), i mean that he grooms her to accept that the way yurgenschmidt's society works is normal and fine. he's not solely responsible for the inherent abuse of feudalism, but he's a product of the system he lives in and a product that's not particularly interested in changing that system, so he views myne primarily as an aberration who needs to be incorporated into yurgenschmidt's nobility and made to understand that things work the way they do because this is the best system. i think people rail against ferdinand being called a groomer for two main reasons-- firstly people think that if you say a character is immoral you're saying that they're a bad person for liking them or finding them interesting, and secondly people not understanding that grooming isn't as simple as mustache-twirling villain evilly and intentionally completely controlling a helpless child. bc yeah rozemyne struggles against ferdinand's attempts to fit her into noble society and at multiple points does the opposite of what he tells her to, but that doesn't disprove my argument! it's actually repeatedly acknowledged(well, joked about) where characters including rozemyne and ferdinand themselves say that ferdinand has made her more and more similar to him. like basically the first thing that happens when he gets her into noble society is him convincing her to start participating in the buying and selling of orphans and speaking of orphans do not get me started on the temple it drives me so insane how her turning it into a company town where they serve as her unpaid labor is presented as her being a saint. that can't totally be blamed on ferdinand but he sure does talk her into accepting that the only way she can interact with lower status people is through the lens of a benevolent master. one of the main facets of their relationship is him making her worse.

which is interesting! conceptually! ferdinand is entirely a product of the cycle of abuse and his reaction to his trauma is to preserve that cycle even as it continues to harm him and everyone around him because it's just the way things are. on that topic, he's completely bought into yurgenschmidt's view of children where 5-year-olds are expected to be capable of fending off psychological warfare and 15-year-olds are expected to be fully mature adults, so he has a vitriolic, burning hatred for wilfried age 6 and later detlinde age 15 despite both of their biggest crimes being not magically overcoming the fact that they're being neglected and abused, because he did, which means it is possible and therefore required. even his favorite oops all negative reinforcement education is irl infamous for being literally the worst possible way to educate children because it doesn't work very well and also traumatizes them, something which rozemyne herself seems to understand when she tries to keep ferdinand from being so harsh on letizia but never ends up interrogating because she can keep up with it. just kind of because? the implication is that she has a big headstart from her being an adult university student in japan but we actually don't see him do much instructing outside of giving his pupils a bunch of stuff to memorize and then getting really mad if they don't do it fast enough, which is... not the most effective strategy, wouldn't help with her memorizing new information, and also requires her to show a level of attentiveness and reading comprehension she never actually shows when she's onscreen doing stuff because when she's onscreen she lacks basic reading comprehension and stops paying attention to literally anything she's not interested in, but all of that's just ignored because the whole reason ferdinand cares about rozemyne is that she's the only one who understands that he's just trying to do the right thing and she's the only one who can keep up with him in this world of idiot sheeple. and i don't like that either i think it's pretty boring.

the specific combination of his plot purpose mainly being to instantly solve problems and his actual character just kind of being an insufferable asshole who won't shut up about how awesome child abuse is means that unfortunately every time the male lead of the series is onscreen i'm booing and throwing tomatoes at the page because he isn't interesting enough to pull off being morally grey or fun enough to pull off being a terrible little freak. and i really do not feel sorry for him because everyone in the story is experience similar levels of abuse but mysteriously the story can recognize that it's bad when literally anyone else treats any character the way ferdinand treats everyone all the time.

the lestilaut comparison is so specifically dumb oh my god. like yeah he has the trauma excuse.... everyone does... if we take dunkelfelger seriously lestilaut was raised in an environment where his worth was entirely placed on how physically strong he is and the only solution to any problem is physical force, so that's the only way he can think of to solve problems. his main character flaws are being kind of a jerk in a way that's very normal for a teenager! like his character introduction is revealed to be him misinterpreting hannelore's desire to hang out with the cute shumils as a need to have them at any cost which combines with the existing prejudices he's been taught(yknow the excuse that works for ferdinand and nobody else) to mean that he executes a stupid plan, and then even the bride-stealing ditter plot which is... not his finest moment, definitely, but is him trying to save rozemyne from what he thinks is severe abuse. which isn't an excuse for his actions, like i said with sylvester you kind of lose the right to appeal to good intentions if your mistakes have a body count, but you could make the exact same criticism of ferdinand. i mean his "i'll get ahrensbach for you" bit is basically just the shumils thing but it's treated as romantic instead of "what the hell are you doing"

tbh in the AU i'm working on i just toss him out the window entirely but if he IS going to stick around he neeeeeeeeds to have his untouchability be dialed way the fuck down. he can't just solve literally every story problem with "and then ferdinand pulled the solution out of his ass" and there need to be things that he is actively bad at which other characters are good at. also other characters NEED to be able to criticize him for things other than being too self-sacrificing or limply saying that even though he's the most skilled wonderful guy ever it's a shame he's such a jerk. instead of having people being worried about how dependent rozemyne is on ferdinand be played for cheap jokes about her being in love with him you could idk have it GO SOMEWHERE because if ferdinand isn't totally perfect then you could have that relationship actually negatively affect her in some sort of way that could perhaps cause a narrative conflict, and there should be sympathetic characters who actively dislike him for reasons other than not being able to keep up with his amazingness. like florencia just thinks he's a massive piece of shit because he tried to get her 6 year old son condemned to the ivory tower, or lutz thinks ferdinand is wrecking the myne he knows and loves in order to fit her into noble society, or charlotte and wilfried just end up hating him after he tries teaching them because he's an abusive jerk. i don't even wanna give him a redemption arc because i don't want rozemyne to need to "fix" him and idk who else it would be outside of maybe sylvester? if i was gonna try and not fundamentally change the structure of aob i genuinely think i would just move detlinde's assassination attempt to basically as soon as he gets settled in ahrensbach and also have it succeed. just fucking kill him! make rozemyne navigate the world without him! it also killing off justus and eckhart could even make it so they're also invading ahrensbach without knowing anything about lanzenave so the silver cloth and instant-death poison can actually matter.

[mauesartetc]

I've observed that some HB fans with trauma feel so attached to the characters and the show that they defend every writing decision and take any criticism as a personal attack. I can understand relating to and feeling sympathy for a character because of personal experiences, but Helluva Boss is a terrible media for emotionally vulnerable teenagers and young adults to uncritically consume.

It just pisses me off that so many people will praise HB for representing abuse with Stolas and Stella, yet ignore the unhealthy relationship dynamics, abusive behaviors portrayed in a positive light and bad writing in general.

Real talk: Speaking as an emotional abuse survivor myself, it pisses me off to no end that Helluva Boss has failed to represent this subject with any sensitivity or subtlety.

It's important to remember that abusers are often charming and charismatic, and they exhibit positive traits (at least early on) that make the other person want to salvage the relationship.

What the hell are Stella's positive traits? In what little screentime she's had thus far, she's been elitist, rude, destructive, pouty, murderous, sadistic, and a little stupid (failing to consider that if Stolas died, Octavia would inherit all his wealth and leave her with nothing). While there's evidence to support the claim that she acted like she was in love early on in her marriage (she's smiling in the Loo Loo Land photo, sleeps in the same bed as Stolas in a flashback and has stated she used to pretend to want to fuck him), there's nothing to suggest her personality was ever anything but odious. Even when Stolas first sees her photo as a child, it portrays an awful little brat.

It's pretty clear Stolas has never had any reason to love her, so why does he stay?

He says it's because he wants Octavia to have "a normal life", aka a two-parent household. But how exactly does that benefit her when those parents are constantly fighting? You might think "Well, that's a lot of parents' excuse for not getting divorced, but that doesn't mean it's right", but the show never challenges his stance on this. There's never a moment when he realizes, "Oh shit, maybe my definition of 'normal' is actually hurting my daughter". He only declares he wants a divorce after his first tryst with Blitzo and on the balcony when he tells Stella he "can't do this anymore". He's doing it entirely for his benefit, not because it would improve Octavia's life.

(And because the writers blatantly favor Stolas and everything he says, I have to wonder if they actually believe the standard nuclear family represents a "normal"- implied in this case to be good and desirable - life by default, regardless of how miserable everyone in the family is. On the off-chance that is indeed the case, as someone who lost a parent at a young age: Fuck all the way off with that, show.)

Also, we're not lead to believe divorce was never an option at any point. If a royal in this world gets divorced, what are the consequences? Would Stolas lose his title? Would he be executed? The whole point of this marriage was to have a kid, so literally what was stopping them from splitting up after she was born (other than the bullshit "normal life" excuse)? Why can't Stolas just visit Octavia? Why does he have to live with her? Plenty of kids with divorced parents still get quality time with both of them. The solution was right there all along, but Stolas felt the need to wait until his daughter was seventeen to split with his wife? For some reason?? The writers try to pass it off as some noble sacrifice he's making, but in reality, he's just being a dumbass.

Okay, so maybe he's just afraid to leave, like many abused people are. I'll have to call bullshit on that, since he never even tried to keep his affair a secret. He's openly flirted with Blitzo in public (at Loo Loo Land and the Harvest Moon Festival, in front of dozens of witnesses) and met Blitzo at a couples-only nightclub, where they sat in plain view of everyone else there. Couldn't even bother using your powers to disguise yourself, bud? Or does that only work when it's convenient to the plot? If Stolas were the least bit threatened by Stella or what the Goetia family would think, he wouldn't be this bloody obvious. While it's possible this is a self-sabotage sort of thing, the show has never given us evidence that Stolas has those kinds of tendencies.

In short, Stella's a hamfisted, stereotypical portrayal of an abuser, and Stolas just doesn't come off like the abuse affects him at all (or at least not until the episode where it needs to for plot reasons). Obviously not all abusers or abuse survivors in real life will fit into the same mold, but there's straight-up zero logic to these characters' behavior. I've mentioned this very astute video before, but here's one quote that perfectly sums up how poorly this show handles character motivations:

There's a... character consistency issue that results from having these characters exist only to dispense abuse. Their actions stop adding up... [Stella's] thing is that she wants to be away from Stolas... Why does she repeatedly show up to the house just when Stolas is around to torment him? This behavior is quite strange. She does not like him. She does not want to be around him... We're to assume that Stella wants to feel mad, wants to feel bad, and that's what she wants to do with her life.

This isn't how real people act. And of course fictional characters aren't real people and any sense of agency they have is just an illusion at the end of the day. But ideally they should feel real to the audience.

I now fully understand why I was leery of these writers potentially exploring a character's addiction. It's because they've shown they can't be trusted to give serious subject matter the care and weight it deserves.

[jjsanguine]

Don't try to emotionally manipulate with music me Last Twilight, I know what's up. How the hell did we get here??

The ending seems almost completely detached from everything that was happening till episode 11. Till the breakup if I want to be generous. Here's some disorganised thoughts.

Why was the timeskip so long?? 3 years of not speaking to each other is not chicken change. Speaking of, why didn't they speak to each other? This isn't legend of Korra, they have Line. We hear all about what Day was up to but there's one shot of Mhok working in a kitchen and otherwise not kpim. Why. Mhok took than job to build his career and I feel like leaving with no notice no nothing probably torpedoed his reputation. Was that job important or nah?

I don't care about Day + Nights dad. If we were going to bring a side character back for 2 seconds at the wedding it should have been Gee because apart from Aon she's Day's closest friend. Or was before she just vanished off the face of the earth as much as August who literally isn't in the country.

I would have liked to see any of Night + Phojai's relationship onscreen. There wasn't enough going on in this episode (even thought it was bare long :/) to not touch on *anything* that happened between phoomjai being born and them getting married. How did Ramon react? I don't think Khun "I can excuse classism" would be chill.

Why the ever living FUCK did Day fully regain his vision. I would have been down if some serious side effect like night blindness or astigmatism or the many problems resulting from having to take anti rejection medication and becoming immunocompromised was brought up but nope. Day struggled a bit for a few years and and got his eyes switched back on easy peasy.

Day being sighted again makes how Ramon was like "I'll stop being abusive (regardless of if or to what extent she meant well) once you stop being disabled" something that will never be grappled with. I doubted they were gonna after episode 11 but still, it was nicer than being certain.

Day broke up with Mhok because he thought Mhok pitied him for being blind. Mhok (and also Mhok's backstory) said it was because of Rung, and I thought this was going to be a segue into Day realising that it wasn't all self confidence and roses chez Mhok but apparently I was completely wrong

Day didn't have to really deep that Mhok has stuff going on because Mhok ACTUALLY has nothing going on. It was just pity. Somehow.

I do not understand why this point causes all the problems in episode 11 and was not mentioned at all in the finale. I don't understand why the solution to this supposed pity was to make day sighted again instead of addressing that.

The thought process send to have been that if Mhok doesn't trust anyone to care for Day and Day doesn't think he needs caring for, by restoring Day's vision they can both be right. It's like when gender screwy dramas sidestep the male lead thinking too hard about his orientation after taking for who he thinks it's a guy by being like, he somehow sensed that it was a girl all along and crucially before he kissed them. Nah. NAH FAM. I didn't forget.

Day + Mhok going back up that mountain at their sighted leisure makes hollow the struggle to reach the top first time round. The view wasn't as nice because it was rainbow bereft just like any of Mhok's actions in this episode (Rung's name means rainbow in English). It's like their relationship in a nutshell. Rung and the ripple effects her death have on Mhok's decision making have no place, no acknowledgement, no nothing.

If I rewatch this Mhok + Days story is going to end on the mountain, first time round, because everything after that was setting up the character assassination arc.

[undead-discourse]

Hey!! Are you a proshipper? Are you an anti? Please read this post, I want engagement from as many people of as many different opinions as possible!

I have a question that I made a temporary sideblog for because I’ve gotten completely different answers depending on who I ask this question (pro vs anti ship)

I fundamentally disagree with a lot of the “talking points” on either side, so I’m not really sure which camp I fit into (and the one I’m assigned usually changes to the opposite of whoever I’m talking to). So I thought it’d be really interesting to see what people have to say about this. I dunno, I like talking, and discussing media. Talk to me about media.

I’ve sorted these into two sections: opinions usually grouped with “proshippers” and opinions usually grouped with “antis.”

Proship Opinions:

Censorship is bad.

We should not censor the internet and banning legal content here is fruitless. It just doesn’t work, and it takes away efforts from restricting actually harmful content.

Harassment is also bad.

Even when the person being harassed is objectively disgusting and vile.

There is never any excuse to tell someone to kill themself. This feels so obvious, why are we even arguing this.

Restricting the content allowed on some sites (AO3) is kinda stupid.

FF.net and Wattpad are living examples of what happens when you restrict written content: it still gets in, but this time completely untagged and with no warning.

I hate AO3’s current policy and I don’t use the site because of that, but the alternative is so much worse, especially considering they can’t afford the extensive mod team that would require.

Just use the block button.

Getting all bent out of shape in someone’s askbox because of their content is completely pointless. You just exhaust yourself and waste your own energy thinking about this person when they definitely don’t give a fuck what you, some bitch on the internet, think of their content.

The easiest solution for your own wellbeing is just to block them and move on. Then you can never think about them again.

Fictional content is never the same as the real thing, and it’s insulting to survivors to insinuate it is.

No children are harmed by the creation of fictional content. Comparing it to real CP is a slap in the face to real survivors.

The concept of “problematic content” being bad by design is kinda dumb.

There are ways to handle anything in fiction tastefully. Your story can cover topics of sexual abuse, murder, exploitation, etc. without being “problematic.”

The reason for the content’s creation and posting greatly changes how it should be viewed and how the creator should be treated.

I’m reminded of Alfred’s Playhouse. It’s so obviously a cry for help, but everyone ignored it because of the gross and shocking subject matter shown. The creator is a disgusting person, but that is unrelated to her creation of Alfred’s Playhouse, a representation of her own real experiences.

It’s… So obvious to me when someone is suffering and using art to vent or call for help. These people aren’t the people we should be talking about when we discuss the handling of sensitive topics in fiction.

Anti Opinions:

The things you create/enjoy completely change the way I view you as a person, fundamentally.

I don’t think you can be a good person and enjoy thinking about fictional children being molested.

I cut people off if I find out they secretly enjoy this content.

Including ex-friends. It hurts and I feel betrayed, but I was not friends with, nor will I ever be friends with, someone who enjoys (whatever).

I think people deserve to know if one of their favorite artists is secretly into something reprehensible.

If a big artist I like had a secret twitter where they posted incest porn, I would be pissed if someone who knew didn’t tell me.

AO3 sucks.

Specifically because of their policy on RPF in reference to (underage) streamers. If someone requests that the NSFW content featuring them be deleted, AO3 should delete it. If someone goes to AO3 and requests they take down a specific fic about them, AO3 should delete it. But they didn’t, and they don’t. So I don’t use AO3.

“Problematic content” should be criticized when it is handled in offensive ways.

There are ways to handle topics such as child abuse, sexual exploitation, etc. tastefully and respectfully to victims, but when creators fail to do this, they deserve to have their treatment of the subject pointed out.

SEE MY ABOVE POINT ABOUT CREATORS WHO ARE SUFFERING, vent art does not fucking count and pointing out the way someone handles their own real experiences in their vent art makes you an asshole.

Proshipping as I’ve seen it looks like such an unhealthy coping mechanism.

To my knowledge, “shipping” means that you enjoy the dynamic between two (or more) characters, typically in a romantic or sexual way. Enjoying the romantic or sexual dynamic between a minor and an adult you headcanon to be grooming them is… So beyond fucked.

This is 100% not my business and I’m never gonna tell someone this, but it’s an opinion I personally hold that I’ve seen attached to antis before.