#like the water damage w/e i could work with that

[lethalrexie]

so a lil bout me if anyone wants to be moots: (i also have a backup in case i lose this acct, it’s the same username but the “e” in lethal is 3)

you 1,000% do not need to read all of this, however i truly think it is super helpful considering i was raised by a dietitian.

im pro-recovery JUST BY CHOICE NOT FORCE. so PLS JUST BLOCK DONT REPORT. we all have backups and backups for our backups. so it’s pointless. you’re breaking up a community where we get support. so fvck u if u report.

my “rexie tips n tricks” losing weight healthily yada yada yada is below the cut if you’re interested!

cw: 180lxs 81kg (i know it got out of hand 🥲)

gw: 130lxs 58kg (doing everything i can to get here by christmas)

ugw: not sure, just wanna see my b0nes. maybe 111lxs (50kg)? (gimme that angel number baybeee)

lw: 145lxs 65kg

so basically, if you do these things i can guarantee you 100% will lose weight. if you’ve plateaued, if you’re just starting out, if you’re trying to take it slow after relapsing, even if you’re petite and need a metab boost to start loosing lxs again, i’m not saying it’s good to be apart of this community but im along this ride w ya so. here u go.

1. keep your e@ting window as small as possible aka eat to live don’t live to eat (the r3xie motto 🤪). i’m f@sting minimum 16:8 and i try to extend that. but major thing is don’t beat yourself up if you can’t make it 16hrs and be happy the days you can make it longer!! esp if your just starting out.

2. stay low c@l. i’m trying my best to stay under 500 c@l/day. and consume that how it works for you. if five 100 c@l snacks over 8 hrs work best some days that’s ok. if OMAD works best, great! my mom is a dietitian and i promise, eating a little of each food group (dairy, carb ik scary, protein, veg & fruit) will help your metab which in the long run will help you l0se more weight. sometimes just having one protein bar mid day works 4 me. others i need a full meal. fuel your body or you will burn muscle which leads to organ damage.

3. don’t do LONG term fasts. i’d say up to a week with heavy liquids is okay. and not just water, incorporate broths, mio, even sugar free jello is good (if it’s clear typically it’s ok) but long term fasts can lower your metabolism, deplete electrolytes, and sodium, which long term is going to bloat you, keep weight on (or make you gain it back quickly), and overall make you feel like shit (which could lead to hospitalization)

4. don’t eat refined sugar or refined foods. do literally AS MUCH AS YOU CAN to eat sugar free and whole foods. i have a major sweet tooth so i turn to sugar free jello/pudding, sf caramels, halo top ice cream if i REALLY need it. otherwise i do sweet fruits and veggie based substitutions for carbs. i use cauliflower rice, zucchini noodles, or there’s these great hearts of palm noodles.

5. eat tons of fiber!! laxatives will help momentarily, consistent fiber will keep your 💩 regular thus keeping your body from holding onto it aka extra lxs. i add unflavored benefiber to a lot of my drinks (the flavored ones have added sugar). i honestly could promise you that fiber will help with shedding !bs.

6. drink as much water as you possibly can. yes you can become over-hydrated so add electrolytes or legit just a lil salt to your water here n there. but your body is going to retain water (!bs), and bloat if you are dehydrated. #1 thing to remember is you are depleting your body of what it wants. finding a way to basically trick it makes it easier and quicker to lose fat.

7. stay distracted! discipline and hunger may hurt now, regret and guilt are going to hurt 50x worse later. a grumbly tummy is not worth it. get some motivational phrases, tactics, distractions, that work for you and RELY ON THEM. water, i use mio in mine when i’m desperate, gum, diet soda, bubbly water, reading, tv, ANYTHING. i have other reblogs with some good motivational tactics. i also look at th!nspø as well as pics of my own body multiple times per day to keep me on track. YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS GOING TO BE MOTIVATED SO YOU MUST BE DISCIPLINED. i repeat that to myself 100000 times a day.

8. incorporate foods/drinks that speed up your metab. coffee, green tea, spicy foods (pepper, cayenne pepper), cinnamon, B12 there’s sooo many. and this goes hand in hand with making sure you’re getting your vitamins. picking up a general multivitamin will help make it so your body doesn’t want to cling onto every last cal it’s fed.

9. exercise if you are mentally & physically able to. i have some other limiting factors which make me unable to go to the gym or get as many steps in as id like. an avg day is 2k-5k steps for me rotting on the couch. i PROMISE like 100% money back guarantee (srry bad joke i swear im not a damn ana coach 🙄) your diet is 1,000,000x more important than any exercise you’re going to get in. exercise will help with toning so i try to get some laying ones done on the couch but dude you burn calories just existing. so if you eat lower than that which is 1k-2k (you can look it up it’s your TDEE) you will lose weight. it may be slightly slower than if you walked 20k steps/day or worked out 5 hrs every day but give it time.

literal str8 up proof of this^^^ is my father. he’s a gym junkie like going every morning at 4am (insanity but not my kind), but was eating a lot, and garbage. high carb and sugar intake. and even though he was working out A TON with a lot of steps/day he was gaining fat. he came to me and i told him str8 up to eat less and stop treating his body like a dumpster. eat healthier. homie is shedding lxs.

so besides all that, if you wanna be moots ill probs just vent and post th!nspø

SORRY IM A CERTIFIED YAPPER

[dangermousie]

Some of my favorite bits from the latest chapters I’ve been reading.

I love that XY ruining Xuan’s attempts to finally have a proper chess game with Jing is a recurring thing ahahah her being like that is both such a sibling thing for her to do but also it all is a continuous test of Jing; their whole relationship up to at least end of s1 of the drama is like a series of tests - she’s like a princess in a fairy tale where suitors need to pass a series of tests for her hand in some way. I don’t think she even thinks of all of the tests as tests but they are. But as time goes on and he keeps passing them the percentage of each action being a test versus XY acting out of love or pettiness or w/e changes and changes and I love it. Like here it’s part test but also she’s acting spoiled because she knows she can and revels in it.

At the end she overturns the board and is all “I won” and he’s happy with that. I think his time at his brother’s hands basically made him very strongly visualize what is essential and what is not - her happiness is and a game is not.

Then there was this bit:

The drama was very close to that scene awww. But also I keep thinking that if XY and XL are mirrors of each other, XY and Jing are a different sort of mirrors to each other - the reason he fell for her was because she saw him when he was physically barely human and he had such issues about himself being horrifying to look at or be around (he mentions he couldn’t even look at his own scars and in the very beginning the narrative says that when he’s washing he’s refusing to look down) and she not only treated him as human she found him desirable. (Side note I really like how it’s never over the head blunt but the way that she really really desires him is made so clear and constant. Rarity in that type of novel.)

But, for her it’s something similar! He has no idea what she looks like and doesn’t care but more importantly for her (because her actual looks - or uncertainty about them - are somewhat of a concern but not THE concern), she has such concerns about herself being unlovable, about her character being difficult, her soul being warped etc and here is the most decent man she’s met indicating over and over that he loves her for her character/soul (which he’d have to, he has no idea what she looks like) and that fills a need in her as deep as her treatment filled in him.

And they both know it’s not motivated by station since neither knew of the other’s proper identity when they met.

Side note - his scars are gnarly by any definition. But until reading the novel I did not realIze that it’s close to impossible to make a wound to scar a god in their world (which is why I suppose he has no burn scars and she has no puncture scars after the whole attempted assassination and its aftermath thing.) Hou had to work extra hard to make sure the scars stuck using some sort of magic water or w/e applied after every torture. So basically in that world of constant physical perfection he sticks out even more and is marked even more as damaged, out of the ordinary. It’s a way huger deal in their world than even in ours. So no wonder he loses his entire mind when she still finds him attractive.

But the thing is I don’t think they are entirely mirrors:

It’s more like the other person provides what the other person lacks (ruthless and gentleness.) But also the above passage sums up that this is not a man who could ever murder his awful family or shove his fiancée out the door in shame or give her abortion soup or w/e AND that is the reason she loves and even needs him. If he could do all that stuff, he’d be free to pursue her yes. But he’d not be the man who could ever win her.

(In a lot of ways, their set up is a gender reversal of the beloved Victorian novel trope of a woman being the better angel for the hero.)

[e-6000]

I posted 35,571 times in 2022

That's 3,228 more posts than 2021!

304 posts created (1%)

35,267 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@themadcapmathematician

@lolgmalolg-did-nothing-wrong

@m-e-w-666

@hotvampireadjacent

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I tagged 6,491 of my posts in 2022

#remember.this - 209 posts

#littletalks.txt - 200 posts

#pickerupper - 146 posts

#unreality - 115 posts

#tlovm spoilers - 109 posts

#2 magnus 2 archives - 92 posts

#prev tags - 76 posts

#sure plays a mean pinball - 60 posts

#recipes - 56 posts

#goncharov (1973) - 45 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i want an au where they're childhood friends‚ never work at the institute‚ and fall in love after accidentally hitting elias with a car and

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Started listening to the penumbra podcast and I have to say, I was not expecting to enjoy the second citadel episodes as much as I am

59 notes - Posted April 3, 2022

#4

Thinking about Elliott's sprite today after looking at his wiki, and he's really buff for a writer?

Like, you, the resident odd poet, have no business being built like that, you sit at your desk all day except for when you go to stare at the ocean longingly. So my personal headcanon is that Elliott's family is actually really involved in building and construction trades (masonry, lumber, etc). Might be like a family owned operation that he was involved in as soon as he could contribute. He quit and left for pelican town bc his family didn't want him to take up writing in lieu of a steady job with them.

63 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

#3

Have a sip of water every time Matt takes psychic damage from something that one of the party offhandedly said. I'm so hydrated

63 notes - Posted February 14, 2022

#2

Kelp beds update

111 notes - Posted March 19, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Showering Harvey in all his favorite gifts for like a week bc I feel so bad about taking him to see mysterium 😔

127 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[whatdoesshedotothem]

[KISS] Saturday 27 December 1834

9 40

11 5

one very good kiss soon after getting into bed and not long after this another not quite so good but very fair very fine morning - frostyish - F44 ½° at 10 ½ at which hour breakfast at 11 ½ having had Washington almost all the time – saw my father and Marian and then a little while with my aunt who looks poorly but had had a tolerable night and was better – went out to the flags for a little while about noon but the sun that had been out before, went in on her appearance and she had no benefit of it – I went out at 12 ½ - in the low and upper land – had the 2 Manns (pit-sinkers) about the drift to be driven to carry off the water from the pit – the level will come out (from the coal band which is 8ft. below the drift band pit now 49 yards deep) a little above the fishpond – I want the stuff from the drift laying up against the road wall on the Conery side – then had better come out into the hollow near the bridge and be taken from the drift up alongside the wall – this would make the drift about 300 yards long – had asked Holt 4/6 a yard for it – be he would say nothing till my return – a great pity - the drift should have been begun at the same time as the pit which would now have to stand till it, the drift, was done - and could not be done in less than 3 months  working night and day - came in at 1 ½ to pay the men the last fortnight’s pit-sinking – found Mr Sunderland just come – he says the place on my aunt’s leg is getting larger but her pulse was much as usual – my father very well – all well for Mr Wortley and his election spite of the reports set afloat by the whigs of his drinking and singing at public houses had Mr Sunderland into the drawing [room] to consult him about A-‘s letting Grieves’ farm named the three offers  S- at first for Warburton    Beattie  out of the question said if W- had any chance for Hipperholme school he had better not have the farm S- agreed and let out as a great secret seeing me interested for W- that he had a good chance of the school  seven trustees it seems? two Sunderlands and Mr Dearden will vote for him and I said one of the others might be gained in spite of Mr William Priestley   I said one might do much for fair words but did not like things scrammed down one’s throats S- seemed pleased to find A- and I in his way of thinking and I really think Mr WP- will be beaten as he was about the choice of an organist

 SH:7/ML/E/17/0132

 out with A- at 2 ¼ - walked with her to look after her planting at Cliff hill – 25 minutes with her aunt – home at 5 - A- went to my aunt – had Pickells – the hunters had been yesterday week in Hopkins’ land, done him much damage - P- thought they had even been in the garden – told him to make inquires – dinner at 6 10 – 20 minutes with my father and Marian – coffee at 7 ¾ - Washington came again (with A-‘s navigation money and my aunt’s ditto from Mr Parker) and took coffee and staid till 8 ½ - sat talking to A- - with my aunt from 9 ¾ to 10 10 - very fine frostyish day - F42 ½° at 10 ¼ pm.

Mr. Warburton and the school

[strywoven]

@hhemeraa has requested a story : ❝ violence changes us. you are not weak to feel its effects. ❞ G!M @ Kaen >:3c

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

For at least a moment , there’s nothing to be said ( no clever retort , no witty remark otherwise ) ; all that greets the deity’s words is a t e n s e , lingering silence.  But it shows , in the way the younger god-creature pauses in cleaning blood and ash from their hands , looking up from the basin to cast Abel a wearied look in the mirror ( how dark eyes flicker with realization , with sobered understanding ) ‘fore glancing back down to slowly , and rather mechanically , continue their task ; He has said something that got them thinking.

Water splashes over their face , washes away the memory of their excursion in swathes of crimson and sooty blackness that swirls down the drain.  Plucking the offered towel from Abel’s hand , they dry themself off , taking the time to h o p e they look like themself again without the blemish of all the so-called VIOLENCE that now so readily comes to accent their person.  Smoke sighs through parted lips , their gaze lifting to find Abel’s face ( seeking , always seeking , looking for more than the words he’s offered ) .  

You are not weak , He’d assured them ; violence would change you as it would assuredly change anyone.

Features are fixed in contemplative stupor , lips and jaw set tight with the way Kaen is tempted to bicker the point , with the way they feel the need to a r g u e with their Patriarch.  This violence , this anger , this grief— !  Was this who they were now ?  Have they truly been altered , been transformed and transfigured so fully ?  Where once they may have said they could never hurt another , where once the song in their heart may have disputed their ill intentions despite the sickness in their soul , now they were sure of the o p p o s i t e ; they were capable , and verily they were DANGEROUS .  Perhaps , then , they were a l w a y s that way.  Abel merely gave them the ability to see themself as they are ( however wretched , however damaged , however destructive ) .  

Kaen shakes their head.  ❝ Y’know , if ye tol’ me tha’ when Ah firs’ came ‘ere Ah woulda’ tried ta’ say Ah wasnae violent , an’ Ah woulda’ tried ta’ deny e’rythin’. ❞  They scoff at the thought , smiling a bit.  ❝ Not so much now , ❞ This , amitted with a shrug , ❝ Ah’m not sure Ah’m better or if Ah’m worse fer embracin’ these parts’a m’self lately but … ‘S certainly made me feel more whole , like Ah’m not tryin’ ta’ keep shit hidden ‘r tryin’ ta’ work ‘arder at bein’ someone Ah’m not. ❞  The longer they talk , the more their words carry on with much the same cadence as their unwavering , resolute trudge into battle ; slow , calm , purposeful.  Kaen allows their smile to grow , if only slightly , their dimmed light beginning to b r i g h t e n .  ❝ Ah think Ah’m grateful fer th’ changes , e’en if they’ve been painful.  But sometimes … It does get a little ‘arder ta’ know who Ah am lately ‘cause o’ tha’.  Ah’ve become so DIFFERENT , so ‘s a lot , like Ah gotta’ reintroduce m’self ta’ m’self. ❞

[master-gatherer]

[goldkirk]

Updates updates

- drove home, saw family, had pizza for ONE EVENING, almost all of us got the plague

- plague sucks but definitely not as bad as if I didn’t have the booster, holy shit I can tell it would’ve been a lot worse. my body keeps trying to get going and then doesn’t need to and I’m like. wow. is this what it’s like to not be in excruciating full body joint pain and a 103 fever and raging coughs that pull muscles. incredible

- had shockingly good first in person interaction with family after moving, then got blindsided with p devastating family news two days later

- on the upside, it made me snap out of stuck-in-the-past-and-not-doing-anything-for-my-own-life mode so I now plan to focus all energy as soon as I get back to WA on building as much of a stable and financially stable life as possible in a giant speed run for a few years so I can give the kids a safe place to land literally asap that will be healthy for ALL of us not just flying in crisis mode at Mach 5

- just started a new job in my company with more data and data reporting work, like a split between client interaction, back end work, UX design, data interpretation, content editing, and presentation creation. Scary but exciting

- I am finally actually okay on money. I am finally actually okay on money. I cannot believe I’m not scared about money every single day right now. I have never felt this ever and I’m still crying occasionally over how grateful I am to those of you who helped me out in the past, you have no idea how much of a difference you made. I wish I could do something to give back but I promise for sure I’ll at least pay it forward however I can

- WHY DID I EVER LIVE HERE. HOLY SHIT IT IS SO HOT I CAN’T WALK OUTSIDE MORE THAN A COUPLE MINUTES MAX.

- I haven’t injured anything in weeks and am not even subluxing most joints I used to now, this is incredible and I’m so happy. I’m in less pain daily than I think I’ve been in since 2013

- I had two major moments recently where I was able to go newer routes instead of having no highway in my brain besides old damaging ones and let me tell you kids, apparently when push comes to shove, all your teeny little million-bad-day-moments of exhausted rewiring do actually add up. So when you’re frustrated that you can only sit and think about how you could do better or what you’d do if you had the ability but you’re stuck in depression or panic or w/e, please be informed that apparently that’s still actually wiring up pathways in your brain. Action isn’t the only thing that builds the highways—just thinking through them does too. So. You’re doing good work still, even when you don’t think you are.

- turns out my hair just hates WA soft water. The second I washed it in MO it had more curl without any conditioner or gel than it has had WITH gel in it in WA for MONTHS. Unbelievable. Is there a reverse hard water filter that puts minerals IN your shower water?

- Aoife. Is a Very Good Girl.

- turns out I haven’t needed antihistamines for full body itchy stress hives since I actually met my family and got it over with. What a stupid amount of stress I built up over that in the past month. I can’t wait to never again get questions about why it looks like I’ve rolled my whole head and torso in plant venom at random five days of the week

- Aoife is so so so so so so so so so so SO good with all the little kids even the babies. Even when she got overwhelmed and totally pooped out she was unfailingly gentle with them. She’ll parkour off of any adult since people reinforced that unfortunately, but she is an absolute angle with tiny humans and even lets the tiny 1-2 year olds boss her around. Hilarious

- I didn’t realize I was depressed but I think I’m finally un-depressed enough to realize “oh shit I was depressed huh. I’m still depressed huh. Better keep working on that”

- on that note. i finally don’t feel like there is no hope or point to ever writing Hymn again. So hopefully soon I’ll have enough not depressed brain to actually imagine non-depressing scenarios for it. Jesus all I could think of was trauma and depression city for that fic. And that’s not what anyone needs—I can write great grim dark but the point of Shutterbug is comfort and found family and HANDLING symptoms not chapter after chapter of more bad news or symptom incidents. Jeez. Anyway I have an inspo folder again so I’m trying guys, I’m trying. I don’t know what I’m the world will be next, or who I’ll finally find a voice through again, but I’m trying. Maybe it’ll be damian! We haven’t had damian in a bit. Or cass. I want cass so bad but she’s just too not depressed for me to get in her head right now. We’ll see!!

- Highly recommend a new fun strategy called “if you don’t like your own personality, an army of RPG OCs can help you try out and build a new one just fine”

- when I get back to WA I’m going to try paddle boarding and build up to going regularly enough i can buy my own board and rent a spot for it at a marina. I have to wait longer to start doing aerial training bc I keep injuring my back but paddle boarding will give me sweet sweet sunshine and core stability and solve most of my “I hate exercising for the sake of exercising” problems. Pls pester me for photos if I haven’t posted any within a month

- if we’re plague free by next week, I’m going to see a rock concert for the first time! And not be afraid of sinning while I do it! no one can make fun of me because there’s nothing to make fun of and no one can shame me because there’s nothing I’m doing wrong.

[blu-joons]

DATING TVXQ A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Jung Yunho

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Yunho loves to keep you safe, that is always his priority with his affection. Any time the two of you hold each other, he’ll want to be the big spoon as he feels responsible for being the one to love you and hold you closely.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

You met Yunho during his recent comeback when you were working backstage at Music Bank. After he got his first win, he decided to treat all of the staff that worked there, you included. When he handed you a coffee, his eyes met yours, and his smile grew. Despite not saying a word, Yunho made a mental note to not leave that night without introducing himself properly.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

After a few weeks of getting to know each other after the evening on set, Yunho knew that he felt that there was a strong spark between the two of you. Eventually, when he took you out one evening, he knew that he had to confess before he risked losing you. At the end of a night of dinner, he reached for your hand across the table just before you headed off, telling you exactly how he felt and the feelings he had moving forwards too.

D ⇴ DATES

He loved to take you out for dinner and be the perfect gentleman for you, but he also loved to do physical dates as well and get competitive. Yunho was a great switch between serene and romantic dates and loud and boisterous dates which you adored. You never knew whether he was going to show up at your door in a suit, or whether he was going to show up dressed casually, vowing that he was about to beat you at mini golf or something similar. No matter what you were doing, Yunho just always had to make sure that he won.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

So many years had been spent dedicated to his work that Yunho had very little time for dating, in fact, he couldn’t even remember the last time that he had been out on a proper date before he met you. He was slightly anxious at the start of your relationship, but like a duck to water, he soon remembered how to date and more importantly, how to love. If there was one thing, he was able to take from his usual self was the role of the gentleman, he took care of everyone, and made sure to take extra special care of you too.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

His passion is one thing that can only be sat back and admired most of the time, but for you, when the two of you start to argue, it can be a slightly more intimidating thing. He firmly believes that he’s right in any situation and will fight with his heart to prove that to you. Eventually, you usually end up leaving to give yourself some space and relax from the intensity of sitting through his passionate rant. Once you return, Yunho is always a lot calmer and very apologetic for getting himself so worked up, reluctantly beginning to admit that perhaps he isn’t as right as he’d always like to think he is and admit that you could be right too.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

Yunho was most keen to introduce you to his little sister as she had been on his back for a while about settling down. He was proud more than anything else to introduce you to his family and know that they were fully supportive of the next chapter in his life, silently hoping that it could lead to a special time for you all.

H ⇴ HOME

He was keen to move you into his apartment quite quickly so he could both spend more time with you and also keep a closer eye on you too. He was definitely wary about how some fans would react about your relationship so Yunho wanted to try and keep you safe within the comfort of his own home and make sure that the place felt like your own too.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

Yunho was the first one to say, ‘I love you,’ one evening. He was convinced that you were asleep beside him after a particularly difficult day for you. He’d been trying to get you to sleep forever, and when you finally did, he leaned across and whispered those three words to you with a promise that things would get better and that he’d be there for you.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

Getting jealous was too damaging to his pride, however Yunho would definitely be alert about situations that could be uncomfortable for him to watch. He was incredibly protective of you and didn’t like anyone around you that he didn’t trust first. Changmin would often end up having to tell him to take a step back when he could sense that Yunho was beginning to get jealous as if he felt strongly enough than neither of you could predict what was going to happen or quite how Yunho would act in the situation.

K ⇴ KIDS

Having a family had often felt like the thing that alluded Yunho, until he met you. Whilst he didn’t want to rush anything with you, he knew he wasn’t getting any younger and definitely wanted to start thinking about a family soon. You’d often sit back and watch Yunho at work and wonder how he’d be teaching his children, the passion and the drive that he’d put into making sure that they were cared for and loved. You knew he’d always encourage them to follow their dreams too and make sure that they reached for the stars.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Despite often being serious and focused when it came to work, when it came to relaxing with you, Yunho loved to laugh. Not many people always got to see the humorous side of Yunho, and so you knew you were lucky to find out more about the real him. He felt so at ease around you that he couldn’t help but smile and laugh, even at the most random things that you did, he’d often giggle himself just in happiness that you were in his life. He always made sure to value with a smile, but most importantly he always made sure to be there when you needed him there to be able to cheer you up and make you smile.

M ⇴ MISSING

Having spent so many years on the road, Yunho never imagined that he could miss anyone again, and then he met you. He often felt like he was just starting out on the road again, reliving the same feelings that he had nearly twenty years ago when he first started travelling and leaving home. He both hated and loved the feeling of missing you, the distance was tough, but it also gave him the motivation to always give that little extra on stage too because he knew you’d be back in Seoul watching fan cams and scrolling through social media after a show so that you could see him and check out their performances too.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

Yunho tended to call you, ‘bub,’ it was something quick that very easily rolled off the tongue for him. There was never really anything else for him, he loved having the one name for you that he could always rely on for an answer from you.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He was obsessed with your eyes; he could tell a lot from them and was able to read very well how you were feeling just by the way that you looked at him.

P ⇴ PDA

Affection in public wasn’t something that Yunho felt was a big deal, he didn’t care what anyone had to say if he wanted to wrap his arm around you or hold you closely into his side. Whilst he was never over the top with his affection, he was more than happy to do his own thing without you without acknowledgement of what others thought.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

He’d often ask for your opinion a lot in career decisions that he had to make. As you were a team, he felt like it was important to get your view too on the choices that he made and make sure that you supported them all.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

The two of you had your own little spot by the river that you always made sure to go to. Going down to the Han River was always something that Yunho had done to clear his mind, but now he had you to go down with him too, he loved to take you down and talk through anything that was troubling either of you. You’d always go to the same spot and sit for hours, clearing your minds and enjoying the fresh air too.

S ⇴ SEX

As with anything that Yunho does, intimacy is always a very passionate and intense affair with him. He puts his heart into everything with you and always make sure to pay close attention to how your body feels and make sure he sticks to the things that you like. His hands will always do a lot of exploring and his lips will always trail along your body, always finding new sweet spots of your body that very quickly become a weakness under Yunho.

T ⇴ TEXTS

Whenever he’s got a schedule through the day, he’ll make sure to update you regularly, so you know that he’s looking after yourself, expecting you to do the same so he doesn’t have to spend his day worrying about you.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

Over so many years, Yunho really felt as if he had it all, aside from the chance of love. Meeting you changed that and gave him the final thing that he felt like he’d been missing out on so far in his life, the chance to love and be loved.

V ⇴ VACATION

He’d been to some incredible places on all of the tours that he’d been on, and Yunho couldn’t wait to take you to some of them and show you the world. To be able to go back and not have to work was a definite bonus for Yunho too, but most of all, he loved being able to take you away and say thank you for all that you did for him.

W ⇴ WHINING

Yunho is long past whining, he’s an adult these days and knows that he can’t have your attention all of the time however much he might want it.

X ⇴ XXXXX

His lips will often be attached to your skin in some way out of habit. He can’t help but kiss you whenever you’re near him, even if he has to take a few steps closer to you, he’ll do it just to be able to peck your cheek. Yunho’s favourite kisses are definitely forehead kisses, he stands slightly taller than you, but what he loves most about them is the feeling of brushing your hair out of your face so that he can lean down and kiss against your forehead.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were his true love, the first real love he’d had, and the last too.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

Strong arms would always hold you close at night, he loved to fall asleep with you against his chest and keep you comfortable in his hold too. He hated distance between the two of you at night, the tighter you were against him, the better.

---

Masterlist

[frogtanii]

hq boys as the crimes they’d commit

warnings: CRIMES, crackfic, probably many typos idk i’m so tired lmaooo, cursing, drinking ??? idfk 😩💦

an: and i did this for what?? inspired by hq hcs royalty @sugardaddykenma @hina-wit-da-glock (AJSKSJ SORRY FOR TAGGING Y’ALL IF YOU SEE THIS, IT IS DEF NOT UP TO PAR W Y’ALLS WORKS ILY)

karasuno

sawamura daichi- insurance fraud!! somehow this is such a dad crime to commit?? dadchi didn’t try (dumb excuse, how do you accidentally commit insurance fraud smh) to commit insurance fraud but at one point in his late-thirties, he was very very broke and was already working as much as possible so, he decided to fake an ankle injury, as you do, and filed a bunch of claims which made him bank. daichi kept doing it until he was able to quit one of his jobs and buy himself a really nice suit and a rolex (uhhh 🥵). he somehow never got caught tho and to this day, none of his friends know how he was able to afford a tesla on a cop’s salary (sorry daichi but acab 😔✨)

sugawara kōshi- child abandonment!! ok you can try and fight me on this but i feel in my bones that suga absolutely despises children. he can tolerate ages 10+ but anything younger than that, he will punt them into the next dimension. the thing is, people just assume he likes kids because of how good he is with his team which is why his aunt begged him to babysit his nephew taro. taro was being an absolute brat when suga took him out for the day and he was 👉👈 this close to snapping. he put taro down for like 3 seconds to pay for their ice cream and when he turned back, the demon spawn was gone. he panicked, running around the park looking for taro when it turns out, taro was just bent down behind the bench. some random karen called the police and suga has never craved murder more.

nishinoya yuu- arson!! you CANNOT tell me nishinoya doesn’t have a ~murder~ playlist that he listens to to get himself hype (me too noya, me too). one night, he got a lil too hype listening to start a riot by duckwrth and watching demolition videos on youtube. he snuck out of his house to an empty shed like 30 minutes away and maybe... lit it on fire while genocide by lil darkie played on a speaker nearby. what he did NOT anticipate was the absolute size of the fire so he freaked out and called the firefighters who promptly called the police. he didn’t want to get grounded so he called daichi to bail him out. daichi still told noya’s parents 😔.

tanaka ryūnosuke- vandalism!! tanaka had been on alt tiktok and saw a group of cool friends spray painting an abandoned building. he thought “that’s cool, lemme do that!” but then he realized he had no friends (AHDGS JK I LOVE TANAKA). he asked nishinoya who was grounded from the arson incident and he knew he definitely couldn’t ask daichi, suga, asahi, or enoshita so he decided to go it alone. that proved to be a MASSIVE mistake. he got the supplies, arrived to the building of his choice (thanks saeko :3), and decided to spray paint a huge p3ni5 in bright red paint. he finished “successfully” and zoomed back home. what he didn’t realize with his two-and-a-half braincells is that he signed his glorious piece with his full name. the cops were at his house the next morning...🧍

hinata shoyō- forgery!! hinata did NOT think that forgery was even a crime. how was he supposed to know that he wasn’t allowed to copy his mom’s signature on a permission form! all he wanted was to go to an overnight training camp 😿

kageyama tobio- attempted murder!! kageyama swears it sounds worse than was and he is absolutely incorrect. what happened was so much worse. he and hinata were having a competition to see who could hold their breath the longest underwater (you can’t tell me they haven’t done some dumbass shit like this) and kageyma lost almost instantly (he has the tiny lungs of an asthmatic). he didn’t want hinata to notice so he held hinata’s head under the water for like 10 seconds. suga walked in though, saw hinata thrashing around in the water and immediately called the police. kageyama never forgave him.

tsukishima kei- cyberbullying!! first of all, i had no idea you could get arrested for cyber bullying!? that being said, neither did tsukishima who spent 80% of his time making fun of people online (and on his real account!! bold). eventually one of the people he bullied (hinata) reported him on instagram and his very lame account was deleted (pls don’t bully people online 😤).

yamaguchi tadashi- shoplifting!! andjksh this is so funny because this scenario has happened to me and i can just SEE this happening to poor tadashi. yamaguchi gets super late night cravings (and usually tsukki will walk with him at like 3 am 🥺 nEWAYS) so he’ll sneak out and walk to the mini-mart near his house. one night, he was so tired but also super hungry so he went onto his nightly routine and basically sleepwalked into the store. he picked out his favorite chips and candy bar (which are sour cream&onion lays and milky ways in case you were wondering 😌✨) and just... walked out the store without paying. the store clerk was mysteriously missing so yamaguchi made it all the way home, ate half the bag of chips and passed out without realizing what he’d done. once he did, he cried for 2 hours straight.

nekoma

kuroo tetsurō- telemarketing fraud!! kuroo originally did telemarketing fraud as a joke?? like he was trying to prank call someone pretending that they had lost their information and they actually gave it to him??? he was mildly concerned but even more excited. he did it over and over again but he never used the info for anything. to this day, kuroo literally has a notebook full of credit card numbers and bank account passwords but he refuses to use it because he believes it’s ✨wrong✨(but it isn’t wrong to take all that information in the first place under false pretenses, not realizing that once people find out, they are forced to close credit cards and accounts but go off self righteous king). once he brought the book up to kenma and he offered to sell it on the dark web. now kuroo feels less bad about what he’s done! :D

kozume kenma- computer crime!! pfttt this one seems kinda obvious but what do you expect from kenma :). he spends so much time on the internet, he’s definitely picked up some less than legal skills that still help him now 👀. kenma did little mini crimes like getting into other people’s wifi but his crowning achievement was when he hacked into the minneapolis pd website and had it so when you opened the page, a black lives matter screen came up. he never told anyone that it was him who did it but he thinks it’s the best he’s ever done.

yaku morisuke- racketeering!! yaku, the feral king, ran an underground gambling ring in the basement of nekoma (do they have basements?? who knows! i don’t!) during his third year. the only reason it didn’t get shut down was because coach nekomata took a portion of yaku’s profits whenever he won (which was literally all the time). everyone on the team has lost money to him which is why they never play with him anymore. they won’t even let yaku play monopoly 😔.

haiba lev- indecent exposure!! poor lev’s head is so empty, he tends to fall for whatever pranks his senpai’s do to him. this time kuroo had somehow convinced him that in order to grow his schlong, he had to run outside naked for 10 minutes because the moonlight had special growing properties. lev was a lil scared ngl because he was already superrr tall and didn’t need to grow his height (or his dick ((boy is hung)) but poor lev is insecure) but he did it anyway. long story short, an old woman saw him parading around the neighborhood naked and called el policia. 0/10 dick did NOT grow and had to spend a night in jail naked 😿

aoba johsai

oikawa tōru- prostitution!! KAKKAKA iwazumi made fun of oikawa for being so shitty and said that he couldn’t pick up anyone if he tried. flattykawa took this as a personal challenge and went out onto the street, asking people if they’d have sex with him. with the way he was asking (and the way he was dressed), people assumed he was a paid w h o r e and someone eventually reported him. iwazumi had to pick oikawa up from the station- he never let him live this one down.

iwaizumi hajime- battery!! it wasn’t technically battery but oikawa is a lil bitch and overreacts (at least in his words -_-). the amount of times iwa-chan has beat the absolute shit out of oikawa is uNREAL. he just can’t handle the stupidity sometimes so he just smacks the crap outta him. not for real for real but the way oikawa reacts, you’d think a murder was occurring. one time, shittykawa screeched so loud, they got a noise complaint -_- hajime hates it in these streets.

matsukawa issei & hanamaki takahiro- conspiracy!! issei and hiro have a secret blog where they discuss conspiracy theories and such but one day, hiro found an article that explained how jfk’s death was an inside job. he sent it to issei who began to theorize how HE’D do it. that devolved into a massive thread on their blog of how’d they murder a president which blew up and caught the attention of the cia who sent the a letter telling them to quietly delete the blog. they did because they were terrified but they kept the letter and now it’s framed in issei’s apartment.

kyōtani kentarō- assault!! baby is an angry little boy but for all the right reasons. he was at a bar (when he’s all grown up, duh) and he spotted an absolute drunk creep hitting on a girl who clearlyyyy did not reciprocate his feelings. kyōtani, being the respectful king that he is, went over to the guy, pulled him by the jacket and beat. the. shit. out of him. while the bartender was happy with the fact that the creep was out, he was not impressed with the damage to his bar. he just sent kyōtani out who casually adjusted his leather jacket and rings, and hopped on his motorcycle to ride away into the night. i am the FATTEST simp for this man ONG 🥴

shiratorizawa

ushijima wakatoshi- stalking!! poor ushijima has no idea how intimidating he can be. he was on a train late at night after practice and the woman sitting across from him left her purse sitting on the seat. being the gentleman that he is, he took the purse and followed her to return it. the only problem is that the closer he got, the faster she ran and when he tried to speak (yknow with his scary, deep, baritone voice), the woman screeched and called the cops on him because he was a “strange, big man who was following her home.” when the police showed up, ushijima was painfully confused and just held up this tiny ass purse in his massive hands. the cops laughed.

tendō satori- ???!! no one knows what crimes (or how many 😳) tendō has committed but each of his teammates have different ideas- ushijima: “i don’t believe tendou is capable of committing any sort of felony. well, maybe murder”; semi: “of COURSE he’s capable of crimes??! do you know how many times i’ve seen him come into the dorm with a suspicious stain of red on his sweater?? *shudders* if i end up dead, tendō did it...” in actuality, the only crime tendō has committed is ~drugs~ but he’s not bouta tell his friends that.

goshiki tsutomu- would be a VICTIM!! my baby tsutomu would NEVER commit a crime!!! i love this man with my everything and the only crime he’s committed is being too damn cute 😤🥺

[plush-rabbit]

Fluff Alphabet - Dabi | Touya Todoroki

A/N: I’m going to tag this as bnha spoilers because idk how many people look at leaks so yeah. Also I hope this was the alphabet you meant!!

A = Admiration (What do they absolutely adore about you?)

Dabi adores your worrisome nature. In a word so cruel, himself included, having you around and dote on him and treat him delicately, relaxes him. He likes to put on his persona and act tough but when you cusp his face in your hands and pepper kisses over him, he melts and leans into your touch.

B = Body (What is their favorite part of your body?)

He loves your neck. He loves to hide his face in it and inhale your scent and rub his over yours. He likes to press himself onto you and feel your heartbeat and brush his lips over your sensitive spots and smile when he feels you squirm from the ticklish feelings.

C = Cuddling (How do they like to cuddle?)

Cuddling only happens during intimate moments or when you initiate it; he’s not one to crawl up to you and lay his head on your chest. He’ll throw his arm over your chest as he rests on his stomach in he’s in a tired mood but if he is feeling intimate, he likes to pull you close to him and rest his chin on the top of your head and lay there until you or him squirm away.

D = Dates (What does their ideal date with you look like?)

An ideal date that he would like to take you out on would be dinner- classic and simple. He just wants to treat you out for a night and order expensive food and drink bottled wine or water- whatever you want- and just talk to you as you both dine. There’s no special reason why he wants a dinner with you, he just think that you’d enjoy it given that most dates portrayed in media are something in that caliber.

E = Emotions (How do they express emotion around you?)

He acts rather expressionless at time, only showing you what he wants to show you and in the beginning of the relationship; the most that you get from him is a smile or teasing remark. As time goes on and the relationship grows, his way of expression changes to more subtle ways that are constant. If he’s in a foul mood, he becomes dismissive and avoids you, loving, he has his hand on you constantly, lips brushing against the shell of your ear and a smile tracing over your burning skin. He’s much more emotional as time grows on, the façade breaking through and the scarred child rearing his head.

F = Family (Do they want one? If they do, when?)

He doesn’t want a family. He doesn’t see himself living long enough to have children and he doesn’t particularly find them worth it given the trouble that could arise. He was never into dating and the thought of being in a committed relationship never crossed his mind so he doesn’t really want children.

G = Gifts (How do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

He’s a bit shocked and speechless if you were to give him a gift. He doesn’t really expect it and if it’s small and something that he likes- in terms of snacks or something small- he’s surprised that you remembered such trivial information. When he gives you gifts, he acts like it’s whatever but he gauges your reactions and he’s pleased when you enjoy what he gets for you. His gift bearing comes randomly and they’re usually something small- on special days he’ll give you something expensive and ignore your questions about where he got the gift.

H = Holding Hands (When/How do they like to hold hands?)

He likes to hold hands every so often. It isn’t something he’s big on; he rather put his hand on your back or on your knee. He only likes to hold your hand when you two are cuddling or if either of you are in a particular bad mood. He likes to keep your hand close to his lips to run them over your fingers or just place them in front of his chest.

I = Injury (How would they act if you got hurt?)

If it’s because of your own fault, he’s a bit annoyed depending on the damage but nothing serious that can’t be fixed by a quick kiss. However, if it were because of someone else’s fault, Dabi would be furious. He would make sure that you’re alive and breathing, and then leave for the day and come back with tinged skin.

J = Jokes (Do they like to joke around with or prank you? How?)

He’s not big on pranks or joking. He might tease you and ruffle your feathers a bit, but he won’t actively prank you. He would joke with you regarding a favorite show or moment. His teasing is much more like holding you close to him when you playfully try to get away and will tickle at your sides.

K = Kisses (How do they like to kiss you?)

His kissing is either quick or rather passionate. If it’s before a mission, he pulls you in for a quick kiss, but when he returns, it becomes more passionate and forceful depending how intense the mission was. Most of the time, his kisses start off slow and he’ll pull you in and gradually the kiss intensifies where you can taste the desperation and need for love on him, pulling away for breath only to return back to the action.

L = Love (How do they show you they love you?)

He shows his love with the little things. You mention in passing that you like peonies, suddenly you have a peony in your room or peony scented body wash. His love is shown through small items that you yourself have forgotten.

M = Memory (Favorite memory together?)

His favorite memory is when he slept over at your place. There was no fear to escape and leave the premises, no rush where he was told to leave through the window or had to sneak out. He slept in a soft bed in a room scented of citrus and fruit and woke up to you coming into your room asking how he likes his coffee. He likes knowing that you thought about him while you prepared breakfast- that you still wanted him.

N = Nightmare (What is their worst fear?)

His worst fear is you. He is terrified of what you actually think of him. He knows that one day he’ll come clean to you, that he will tell you the truth of who he is and he worries how you’ll react. You already know who Dabi is, the murderer that reeks of burnt flesh, but he fears you knowing the child that he had to kill in order to survive and what you’ll think of him under a new light.

O = Oddity (What is one quirk they have?)

He is often stuck in his own head. He will keep his thoughts to himself and if you were to encourage him to open up he’ll come up with a lie to soothe you over and lay awake at night while you rest next to him. He doesn’t want you to get caught up in his storm of a mind.

P = Pet Names (What do they like to call you?)

He likes to stick around with doll, baby, sweets, babydoll, or dollface. There’s something that gets to him knowing how precious you are and hearing it ring out where you take it with flattery and respond to his pet names.

Q = Quality Time (How do they like to spend time with you?)

As long as you’re near him, he doesn’t mind what you two do. If you want to be around him while he drinks alcohol, he’ll offer you a sip and nothing more if you deny. You want to watch a movie? That’s fine with him as long as you sit close to him. He just wants to be around you, he doesn’t have much of a preference on what you two do.

R = Rhythm (What song reminds you of them?)

It’s a soft melody that plays in the dead of night as you drive by with the streetlamps lighting your way on a summer night. It starts off small and sounds nostalgic and it slowly builds up its tempo until a smile grows and he’s tapping his hands, mind drifting to you.

S = Secrets (How open are they with you?)

Dabi is open with who Dabi is. With Dabi, it’s what you see, is what you get. There’s no mistaking who he is unless denial is your strong suit. But beyond whom Dabi was growing up? He’s tight lipped. He won’t tell you, will push past your worries and force for a change of conversation.

T = Time (How long did it take you to get together?)

It took quite a bit. He never wanted a relationship. Never saw the need for love and a commitment and with you, it was supposed to be a fun time but he caught feelings. He can act like he doesn’t care, but he cares too much. He tries to smother the feelings but it doesn’t work and he ends up falling harder and ends up confessing to you out of nowhere.

U = Upset (How do they act when you’re upset?)

Depending on how upset you are, he either leaves you alone or bugs you about it until you either snap at him or tell him. If he can tell that it will blow over in an hour or two, he’ll let you simmer down. If you are upset and it has been festering, he wants you to tell him. He’s trying to be a good partner and wants to help you.

V = Vaunt (What are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)

He’s extremely proud of you. He will show you off. He’s making sure that people know that you are off limits. He has his hand on you at all times and if you can fight, he’s hyping you up and throwing an arm around your neck and pulling you close, giving you a predatory grin as he exclaims how good you looked.

W = Warrior (How do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

He has no real preference if you want to fight or not. He would prefer if you stayed out of harm’s way but if you can fight someone, he’s not going to make you stand on the sidelines. He would fight for you. He wants to protect you, wants to keep you safe as much as he is physically able to, so he keeps you close. If you want to fight beside him, he’s soaking it in and fighting with you.

X = X-Ray (How well are they able to read you?)

It’s almost a bit frightening with how well he can red you. You can be stoic but he’s able to tell if you’re upset or brimming with happiness. He can read your emotions and is able to act accordingly.

Y = Yes (How would they propose to you?)

His proposal would be simple. It’s thought out yet not extravagant. He prepares a nice meal, makes sure everything goes smoothly and when you stand, he takes you in his arms and whispers the question in your ear, ring in pocket and you can hear how nervous he is as he asks you the question, feel the trembles in his body while he waits for your answer.

Z = Zen (What makes them feel calm?)

Dabi is emotional. He bides his time and when it comes down to it he shows his true colors. Once in a manic mindset, not much can calm him down but as he relaxes, the negative emotions setting in and the burning feeling of his skin finally aching, he wants to cuddle up to you. He likes when you massage his scalp and rub aloe vera on his skin as you sing him a song or talk about anything.

[kyber-queen]

All Laid Bare (Crosshair x Reader)

Summary: Mechanic!reader is asked to accompany the bad batch on a mission. Reader’s been on a few dates w Crosshair, but we get a lil bit more ~emotional intimacy~ in this mission in addition to some physical intimacy. You can read this as a continuation of the Got Our Wires Crossed/Shot in the Dark universe, or as a stand-alone!!

Rating: Everyone

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Crosshair’s a lil insecure, mentions of the regs being assholes, a few kithes

Author’s Note: I actually had a tricky time writing this on e, but I hope the result is worth it!! Enjoy!! Thanks to @porgnugget for requesting this!!

***

“Let me get this straight, you want me to what?”

Hunter grinned slightly at your bewilderment.

“We want you to come with us. We need a mechanic, and you’re the best one here. All you need to do is repair the ship once it lands—the entrance atmosphere is pretty caustic, and according to Tech’s calculations, we won’t be able to make the hyperspace jump back without some pretty significant repairs. You in?”

Hunter stared you down expectantly.

Were you even allowed to say no? Hunter was your commanding officer, and you didn’t usually have much of a choice when it came to direct orders. You shook your head with exasperation—you were pretty sure this was at least three different kinds of illegal. This mission was light years above your clearance level, you were about to be a civilian in a war zone, and last time you checked, targeting an outpost of the technically neutral banking clan was a war crime.

You pointed all of this out to Hunter, who merely replied with, “All in a typical mission, right boys?”

Wrecker gave a grunt of assent from his seat on the Havoc Marauder. Your eyes flicked over to Tech and Crosshair, the former inspecting your work on the control panel and the latter trying his very best to look preoccupied. You caught his eye as he attempted to sneak a glance at you. Your lips tilted into a half smile and his features softened a bit in response.  

“Tech—you said the atmosphere’s gonna damage the ship? There’s no way for you to fix it yourselves? You can comm me from the base and I can walk you through it,”.

Tech looked up from his datapad.

“The comms’ll be down. The entrance atmosphere of this moon resembles an asteroid field—floating debris makes the signal intermittent at best. We’re guaranteed to take at least a few hits to the Marauder while entering, and I can’t do all the repair work alone,”.

You nodded, resigning yourself to your fate. They’re lucky you love them. “I’m in. What’s the plan again?”

***

Hunter thought he had prepared everything down to the tiniest detail. Tech had estimated the ship damage and repair time, Crosshair had stocked the arsenal, and Wrecker had ensured they had enough explosives to blow the outpost sky high. It was droid-manned, so there were no qualms about civvie casualties, either. The mission was simple—get in, secure the Separatist account codes, and destroy the evidence. These codes were necessary for the Republic’s effort to implant a digital siege on Separatist resources. Hunter was sure that after his team’s extensive planning, the mission would go off without a hitch—that is, until his di’kut of a brother ended up a few minutes away from contracting heat stroke.

“Cross, take your damn armor off before you pass out,” Hunter grumbled. Repairs were projected to take at least another hour, and the jungle planet’s climate was dangerously hot and humid. The rest of his brothers had shed their armor hours ago, with Wrecker using his vibroknife to shear off the sleeves of his blacks. How exactly he planned to reattach them once he redonned his armor was another story.

Crosshair didn’t bother to respond, huffing from his seat against the hull and drumming his fingertips across his helmet in his lap. He spared a glance at you, studying the focus in your gaze as you mended the ship.

You looked up from the engine reactor—the ship had taken a hit right to the engine room from a massive chunk of debris. The planet’s heat was all-consuming and you made a note to work quickly, although you needed to wait a minimum of an hour for the hull sealant to set. You took inventory of the group—their armor decorated the ship in piles, and they had consumed nearly half the water supply they had brought with. You noticed that Crosshair still wore his plastoid. That could not be comfortable—plastoid tended to trap warmth exceptionally well, creating a heating system that worked wonders for the cold but turned stifling in the heat. He looked ill. His face was pallid, and sweat rolled along his cheekbones in large droplets. Your hands stilled, your work forgotten.

“Cross, you’re sweating,”. Your brows furrowed in concern.

“It’s a jungle,” Crosshair replied sarcastically.

“Take the plastoid off, might help,” You grumbled, preparing to turn back to your work. If he was still able to snark, he couldn’t be too far gone.

Wrecker jumped in.

“Yeah, Cross, take the armor off,”. Realization flooded Wrecker’s face “Ah, or are you all shy because—”

Hunter gave Wrecker a sharp nudge, cutting him off with an intense look. He then caught your eye, and nodded towards the exit. You raised an eyebrow, setting down your tools and rising from your seated position.

“Tech, can you finish up that last hull section? I need some fresh air,”.

Tech nodded in assent as you followed Hunter out of the Marauder. You began your inquisition as soon as the two of you were out the door.

“Cross looks like he’s about to keel over. It’s hot as hell—why does he still have his armor on? Is something wrong?” You questioned. You cocked your head, crossing your arms over your chest.

Hunter sighed, shaking his head.  

“Have you two…”

“Have we what?” You searched Hunter’s face, confused.

Hunter cleared his throat.

“Have you seen him without the armor, yet?”

You huffed, your cheeks growing warm.

“No, I haven’t, but I don’t understand why that would be important now,”.

Hunter shifted his weight to his other hip, tapping nervously on his vambrace.

“I know my brother, and, uh, he had it rough growing up. We all did, but him especially. The regs were…”

Hunter trailed off, and you furrowed your brows.

“The regs were…” You prompted.

Hunter shook his head, seemingly brushing away old memories.

“To cut a long story short, Cross was always skinnier than the others. They gave him shit for it, we dished it back, but it was tough for him. The armor…evened the playing field, I guess? He’s always been fine around us, but with you…” He trailed off yet again.

Oh. Oh.

You nodded in understanding. If it weren’t for the sincerity in Hunter’s tone, you’d have half a mind to believe he was joking—Crosshair was confident, cocky at times. It was unlike him to display anything other than the silent bravado you had come to know and trust. You sighed.

“I’ll talk to him—it’s gonna be an hour or so until the hull sealant is fully dry. Thank you, Hunter,”.

Hunter furrowed his brow—his brother wasn’t typically one for conversation, but he figured it wasn’t his place to say much more. Hunter nodded sharply, and you followed him back into the Marauder.

Tech glanced up from his datapad.

“Sealant’s been applied. We’ll be ready to move out in an hour”

You nodded. Crosshair rose from his seat as you settled against the Havoc Marauder’s undamaged wall. He made his way to the door.

“Where are you going?” Wrecker grumbled.

“Out,” Crosshair replied, not even bothering to look back.

You exchanged a look with Hunter, rising from your seat. He shook his head slightly. You settled back against the wall, resting your head against the durasteel and closing your eyes.

***

Thirty minutes later, and Crosshair was nowhere to be found. Your brow furrowed—what if he had gotten into trouble? His brothers didn’t seem particularly concerned, but then again, they all had weapons to clean and mission tactics to mull over. You were stuck with only your mind and its waterfall of thoughts.

“I’m gonna go look for Cross. Be back soon,”.

Hunter nodded in response to your statement, and with his approval, you headed out the door.

Without the ship’s coolant system, the planet’s humidity quickly overwhelmed you. You yanked your arms out of the sleeves of your flightsuit, tying them around your waist. You swept a stray hair from your forehead—where was he? You decided to circle the clearing you had landed in before attempting to brave the tall trees and thick vegetation, both of which could be home to creatures you dared not disturb.

You didn’t have to walk far to find the sniper—he had settled against the other side of the Marauder’s external hull, his plastoid as well as the top half of his blacks in a pile at his feet. Your eyes glanced over his skin, tanned and scarred from battle. His shoulders flexed as he scrubbed the barrel of his rifle. Your face flushed.

“Crosshair?”

He looked up from his rifle sharply. You took a step back, not wanting to alarm him. His features relaxed slightly once he realized it was, in fact, you and not some jungle beast. The state of relaxation didn’t last long.

Crosshair glanced at the pile of armor at his feet and then back to you. You smiled gently—was that pity in your expression? He shrugged in on himself.

“Need something?” He grumbled. He reached for his blacks, pulling them over his head.

You watched as he yanked the fabric over his torso, your eyes training in on the sliver of scarred skin that peeked out from the hem of his top. Crosshair stared at you expectantly. You blinked.

“Just wanted to check on you,” you answered honestly. “I was worried you had keeled over in the bushes or something,”. You lightened your tone, hoping to lighten the mood as well.

“Consider me checked on,” Crosshair replied flippantly, looking back down at the rifle in his hands before fiddling with the sights. He had put up his walls again.

You sighed and walked over to where he was seated against the Marauder. You slid down the durasteel until you had settled yourself a foot or so away from Crosshair’s position. You looked out at the jungle for a moment before turning to face the marksman.

He was a man of few words—you knew this. He wouldn’t be one for a long-winded, emotional conversation. You figured you might as well just spit it out.

“You know I think you’re attractive, right?”

Crosshair looked up from the rifle. His brow furrowed.

“I like you—all of you—if I didn’t, I don’t think…” you trailed off with a nervous laugh. Words failed you.

You searched his face. His features were inscrutable.

Should you speak again? You felt a need to fill the silence, but you worried your words were straining the tension rather than alleviating it.

Before you could utter another bumbling sentence, Crosshair lifted a hand from his rifle to your cheek, pressing a hasty kiss against your parted lips.

If his goal was to shut you up, he succeeded. You stared wide-eyed at the sniper, the beginnings of a grin tugging at the corners of your lips.

“Was that okay?”

You nodded. You pulled him back in with a smile.

You kissed him slowly this time, his lips surprisingly soft against yours. He hummed as your hand traveled upwards to stroke his jaw, your other remaining firmly fisted in his blacks. You brushed your lips against his once more before pulling away to press a series of kisses in a line from the corner of his mouth to below his ear.

“Thank you,” he murmured, tilting his chin upward with a sigh as he melted into your touch.

You broke away to meet his eyes, and allowed both your hands to slide down to rest at his chest.

He didn’t need to say any more.

He pulled you into one last kiss—one that made your spine tingle as his skilled fingers found their way to the nape of your neck. You made a mental note to explore more of this later. For now, you had a mission to complete. You rose from your seat, brushing off your legs.

“Sealant should be dry soon—we should get back,”.

Crosshair nodded in response.

You tossed a final glance over your shoulder as Crosshair followed you back to the ship, his silhouette highlighted by the setting jungle sun. He stood taller without the weight of his armor, you noticed. You smiled.

[dangermousie]

Something Happened in Bali eps 1-2 rewatch thoughts

It's really interesting, rewatching this. God, I'd almost forgotten how much I love Jo In Sung. LOVE. I mean, I love him and his nervous energy so much that I don't even notice So Ji Sub, who normally I really like. (ide note - A Dirty Carnival was the best Korean movie I have ever seen, and what made me truly and utterly lose it for him - but it was so brutally hopeless, it made me depressed for days. Go watch!) Anyway, back to the drama. 1. I'd almost forgotten how unpleasant the two guys and Other Girl are in this, at the start. None of them are monsters (though by the end the Secondary Girl comes close, IMO, even if I end up feeling a repelled kind of pity for her) but they are all in their selfish shells - it's little things, like not helping Soo Jung with her heavy bag or treating her as an extra in their lives. Even their kindness is this thoughtless kind. It's funny because I am not sure if they change in niceness quotient that much (though both the men become much more desperately vulnerable, especially Jae Min) but I guess I get to know them so well and their reasons for being the way they are, I sort of end up not caring - I end up adoring Jae Min as a character, especially, so much. Even if he is the biggest trainwreck I have ever seen as a kdrama lead in my 15+ years of watching kdramas. 2. Soo Jung. I adore her. You could see how annoyed she is she is dealing with the tour group from hell (the other 3) but the way she pushes and carries on is WONDERFUL. So is her drunken camaraderie with Jae Min. She is in another universe from the poised, iced, controlled Young Joo. But it's interesting, she seems so (relatively) well-adjusted compared to the rest of them but as the drama unfolds, you see that this hard-earned cheerfulness is a facade and she is very broken too - between her and Jae Min, I am not sure, which one is more screwed-up. For him, it's his family, but for her, it's her poverty that has made her so. Ha Ji Won SLAYS in this role (so do the rest of the cast, of course.) She’s rough, she’s desperate, she’s grasping, she’s vulnerable, she’s irresistible - in other hands you would never get how two screwed-up, closed-off men would fall so desperately for someone so greedy, so grasping, so flawed - but here you are drawn to her vividness, to her joy, to her intensity, to her unique combo of sunshine and extreme damage. 3. You know, there are hints about her screwed-upness even this early on - the scene where Jae Min offers her $$$ for a one-night stand and she calls him a jerk (and you see by his reaction he doesn't even understand that what he said was insulting - he is puzzled. In his world, everything can be bought and sold, and there is no such thing as affection.) and then asks whether he is going to pay before or after. In her world, there is no room for the grand gesture, for throwing money in his face. She leaves only because he kicks her out (giving her money but not doing anything) telling her to buy her new shoes (hers are broken) and saying "it's not fun any more" (the first of many instances she really throws him off any usual ways he deals with things). And then she trips on her broken heels walking out, sprawling in the lobby, inelegantly grabbing and picking up money. 4. One of the biggest delights of this rewatch for me is contrasting in my head the way Jae Min is going to be with her later - utterly desperate and "brought down" and willing to beg and beg and beg, and the way he is now - emotionally detached, with all the 'power' on his side - I mean, contrast his propositioning her for that one-night stand and the scene where they finally make love, a dozen eps from now. Though she is totally rattling him even now - I love the scene where he first truly notices her - seeing her in the parking lot trying to fix her shoes, eating, and drinking. She is just so REAL and alive and immediate. No wonder he's caught (and then quickly looks away). 5. Jae Min's father needs to die in a fire after being slowly cut with a myriad of razors - the scene in his office in ep 2 where he is practicing golf in his office and Jae Min flinches any time the golf club is in his vicinity, and almost stutters, just - RAGE. Increased 1000x by what I know he does later. But I confess to being amused in the scene where he is throwing things at Jae Min during the board meeting and a flunkie keeps moving things up to him to throw - folders, bottle of water, so he won't run out of things - a definition of a brown-noser.

6. I love how oddly real this drama feels in its filming - people are not glamorized within an inch of their lives and there is no glossiness, no studied detachment, no appeal to coolness or w/e. It is what it is and it knows it. God, I love this drama!

7. (The below is spoilery for the whole thing) Bali has the distinction of having the most dysfunctional couple I have ever shipped. Years of therapy were needed for those two. Yes, my OTP was Jae Min/Soo Jung, despite the fact that the otp's end was murder/suicide. I don't care, I still shipped them - the ending of the drama is one of my favorite drama moments, in actuality - Jae Min becoming more and more unhinged because of his nightmarish family and then finally he believes Soo Jung just played him in order to scam money and ruin his family with her lover. He tracks them down to Bali and finds them in bed. Ironically, Soo Jung has just finished telling her lover that she wants to leave him and go back to Korea to look for Jae Min because it's him she wants. Jae Min, of course, does not hear her (and he is so catatonic at that point, I doubt it would have registered if he did hear). So he shoots her and her lover dead as they lie there. But while her lover is dead asap, Soo Jung has time to look at Jae Min and tell him 'saranghae' which is about the most awesome thing ever - she has never ever told him she loved him before, not through all his efforts to win her heart, not even when they made love. And now she is telling him as she is dying, because it's important to her for him to know before she dies - there are no games or conditions. And of course, Jae Min snapped out of it as soon as he shot and he is falling apart as is and then he hears her tell him she loves him and his face - oh my God. And he goes outside and kills himself and I sit there bawling and hoping his horrific family all have collective heart attacks and die.

Yes. I ship THAT. I don't care what it makes me. The drama makes no bones that Jae Min is beyond messed up - I am kinda amazed he is walking and talking, to be honest. His father wins the incontrovertible award for the worst kdrama father ever and if you know kdramas you know what a feat that is. The scene where Jae Min is on his knees in front of his father, weeping and begging to be allowed to have Soo Jung and his father beats him half into unconsciousness and then tells him it's Soo Jung's fault and he will go after her next and make her disappear and Jae Min is left pleading that he did not mean it and it's not Soo Jung's fault and he misunderstood? FLAMES. FLAMES WHEN I JUST THINK ABOUT IT. So his love for Soo Jung is no help - I don't think any woman could have 'fixed' him, and certainly the hugely messed-up despite her sunny demeanor Soo Jung, with her own major issues and fragility, was about the last person to do so. However, even if they could have worked out their happiness, with the help of some really high-priced therapy, his family made it impossible - in fact they turned the screws on even worse, not caring that their actions were plainly driving him into nonfunctionality land. But then - how else could it end with all the destruction and damage and desperation on both sides and his having no experience with any expression of love that was not entangled with violence. And in context of fiction, the OTP that has the potential for helping each other but dooms each other instead is my jam SO MUCH!

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #177

Today on Fate and Phantasms we’re making Nitocris (Assassin), the return of best girl! All we gotta do for this build is make a build where you can defend yourself with a super powerful sheet, drown your enemies, and summon Medjed for combat. Super easy.

Oh yeah, we also have to make a super-adaptable vehicle that can defend us from any kind of harm because SOMEBODY went ham on the safety features and left us with having to stick them in the build. I’m not saying names though, and Scheherazade should be grateful.

Anyways, this build’s mostly a Shepherd Druid because druids are busted like that, but we’re still dipping into Grave Cleric for a bit of flavor and Monk for her defenses and a better time in melee combat.

Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: Team Killer Demon King of the Xth Heaven!

Race and Background

Surprisingly, putting on a swimsuit doesn’t change your life story that much. Nitocris is still a Fallen Aasimar Noble, giving her +1 Wisdom, +2 Constitution, Darkvision, Celestial Resistance to radiant and necrotic damage, Healing Hands to heal people as an action, the Light cantrip, and proficiency with History and Persuasion. You are a pharaoh, and you are Nitocris. That’s all you need to understand history and to persuade people.

Ability Scores

Actually surprisingly, putting on a swimsuit does change your physical abilities a little bit. Your Wisdom is still the highest stat, you’ll want that for ruling and for summoning god magic. However your second highest stat is Constitution. That sheet can really take a beating. Dexterity comes next so you don’t die while wearing a swimsuit. Your Charisma isn’t bad, I wish it could be higher, but we don’t need it mechanically. Your Intelligence is a little low, but it’s summer, everyone’s relaxed. Finally, dump Strength. You still aren’t a powerhouse, except in our heart.

Class Levels

1. Druid 1: Starting off as a druid gets you proficiency with Intelligence and Wisdom saves, as well as two druid skills. I’d grab Religion and Animal Handling. You’re really good and handling those medjed, and mechanically most of them will be beasts in this build.

You can also write Druidic (it’s a language!) and cast and prepare Spells using your Wisdom. You can pick from any spells on the druid spell list, but you’re limited each long rest to a number equal to your wisdom modifier plus your druid level.

You also get a couple cantrips that you’ll always have; I suggest Guidance so you’re always a bit better than those plebians, as well as Shape Water as a taste of what you’ll be able to do later.

In order to shape water, you’ll first have to make it, with Create or Destroy Water. A lot of your drowning spells require standing water to work, so you’ll be well acquainted with this one moving forward. You also get Absorb Elements and Protection from Evil and Good to serve as your early defensive buffs from your cloak.

2. Monk 1: For further defense, we’re bouncing over to monk real quick to get Unarmored Defense, giving you an AC of 10 plus your dexterity modifier plus your wisdom modifier. You also get Martial Arts, letting you make physical attacks using your Dexterity instead of strength, dealing a minimum of 1d4 damage. Also, you can attack as a bonus action after attacking as an action. The medjed are great, but sometimes you have to stand up for yourself.

3. Cleric 1: One last multiclass, I swear. As a Grave cleric, you learn and prepare some more Spells using your Wisdom, and you also have a Circle of Mortality so your healing spells automatically do as much healing as possible on creatures that are at 0 HP. You also get a buffed version of Spare the Dying that you can cast at range as a bonus action. On top of that, your Eyes of the Grave can use your action Wisdom modifier times per long rest to sense undead nearby.

You also get even more cantrips! Grab Resistance for more defense, Thaumaturgy to truly capture the godly aspect of being a pharaoh, and Toll the Dead for just a bit of ghosts. As a treat.

You also get first level spells, including Bane and False Life for free! Being covered in medjeds makes it hard to do stuff, and again, that’s one cool cloak. You can also swap protection from evil & good and create & destroy water over here to free up some druid space, but for new spells check out Command for a pharaoh’s intimidating presence and Shield of Faith to either increase your own AC or throw your towel on another ally.

Since this is your third level overall, you also get your Necrotic Shroud, spending an action to create a true beach panic in a 10′ radius around you. When you transform, you force a charisma save (8 + proficiency + chr mod) on all creatures in range, and if they fail they’re frightened for a round. For a minute afterwards you can add necrotic damage to your attacks once per turn. Afterwards, you can’t do this again until you take a long rest.

4. Druid 2: Now that our multiclassing is done, we can go back to our main class and become a Shepherd druid. As a second level druid, you can either use Wild Shape to transform into an animal yourself (not really canon, but you know how egyptian gods are) or you can use those charges to summon a Wild Companion with a free Find Familiar spell. If you turn into a beast, it has to be cr 1/4 or lower, and can’t have a swimming or flying speed. Your physical stats get replaced with the new stat block, but you keep your proficiencies and your Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma scores. The beast’s HP effectively becomes extra HP for you, and once that’s depleted you turn back into a human. er, aasimar. You keep all the cool stuff from your race & classes, but you can’t cast spells while an animal.

Whether you use your wild shapes to turn into an animal or find familiars, they both last Half your Druid Level hours, and you get two uses per short rest.

As a shepherd druid, you can use your Speech of the Woods to speak Sylvan or to animals, and you also get a Spirit Totem that can protect your party for up to a minute that you can summon as a bonus action once per short rest. Later we can call these safety features in your car, but for now they’re just kind of here.

If you summon a bear spirit, creatures you choose in the aura get temporary HP, and advantage on strength checks & saves. If you summon a Hawk Spirit, you can use your reaction to give advantage on an attack in the aura, and all allies have advantage on perception checks. If you summon a unicorn spirit, you get advantage on all checks to detect creatures (kind of horning in on the hawk’s territory, but w/e) and you can heal each creature inside the aura at the same time you use any healing spell. Perfect if your best friend is terrified of death!

5. Druid 3: Third level druids get second level spells, like Summon Beast for your very first medjed! It’s not spectacular, but you can create land, sea, or air medjeds to give those mini nobbus a run for their money. You could also use Animal Messenger for utility medjeds. If you need to make a quick escape, pull down your hood to Pass without Trace. I won’t bring it up each level, but feel free to grab healing spells too. It’s what Scheherazade would have wanted. Also, feel free to ask the gods for advice with Augury.

6. Druid 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to become Resilient against dexterity saves. This rounds up your dexterity for stronger punches and a better AC, and you also become proficient in dexterity saves so that fireball won’t be quite as dangerous.

Your Wild Shape improves a bit, letting you transform into swimming creatures of CR 1/2 or less.

You also learn the Mending cantrip, because that cloak of yours has seen a lot of action by this point, and it probably needs some loving.

7. Druid 5: Fifth level druids get third level spells, like Conjure Animals. You can summon eight beasts of CR 1/4 or lower, four of CR 1/2, two of CR 1, or 1 of CR 2. They’re friendly, and listen to your commands. I’d recommend some smaller creatures for a medjed swarm, or one big creature for your car. Aurochs are good for flat land, Cave Bears for water, a young bulette if you expect to run people over... this is a pretty versatile solution.

You can also use Protection from Energy for more... protection, and Tidal Wave for your first true drowning option against your foes. Creatures in a 30′ by 10′ by 10′ area must make a dexterity save, and if they fail they take bludgeoning damage and get knocked prone. On a success they take half damage and stay standing. Afterwards, the water spreads out an extinguishes fires, but sadly it doesn’t stick around, so you’ll still have to use Create & Destroy Water for the bigger spells coming up.

8. Druid 6: Sixth level shepherds become Mighty Summoners, giving their creations two more HP per hit die and letting them slip through nonmagical damage resistances. The medjed are gods in their own right, getting stopped by a devil would just be weird.

9. Druid 7: Seventh level druids get fourth level spells like Control Water, which lets you control freestanding water within a 100′ cube. You can create floods which create waves in larger bodies of water, you can part water to move through them (...Ozymandius will not be happy to see that little trick pop back up in his life), redirect the flow of water in impossible ways, or create a Whirlpool in larger bodies of water that traps creatures who fail an athletics check.

If you want your medjed to be a little more godlike, try Conjure Woodland Beings to summon fey creatures instead of beasts. At least they’ll have magic?

10. Druid 8: Eighth level druids get another Wild Shape improvement, so now you can fly as a creature of CR 1 or lower. (Also it’s weird that Wild Companion didn’t get any buffs as you level up.) Either way, use your new ASI to bump up your Wisdom for stronger spells and a better AC.

11. Druid 9: Ninth level druids get fifth level spells, like Antilife Shell, the ultimate in anti-personnel protection! For up to an hour, living creatures outside your barrier can’t enter or make attacks against you unless they have ranged or reach weapons. The downside is that if you get surrounded and can’t move the other creatures away, you’re stuck unless you pop that bubble. You could also Awaken a huge or smaller creature or plant to act as your car on a more permanent basis. Awakened trees aren’t the fastest rides, but they’re pretty sturdy. The awakened thing is charmed for up to 30 days or until your party does something stupid, afterwards it’s up to the target to decide how it feels about you. Don’t mistreat your car.

12. Druid 10: Tenth level druids get another cantrip, and Druidcraft is just really versatile. It’s good. Your spirit totem also become a Guardian Spirit, healing your summoned creatures at the end of their turn by half your druid level.

13. Druid 11: With sixth level spells, you can summon a great medjed to lead your troops with Conjure Fey, creating a fey or beast of CR 6 or lower. It’s friendly while you maintain concentration, but if that drops it becomes hostile and might attack. A lot of your spells work best with good charisma checks, thankfully you’re Nitocris. You can also create Primordial Wards, giving you resistance to acid, cold, fire, lightning, and thunder damage for up to a minute. During that time, you can react upon taking damage of those types to gain immunity to that type until the end of your next turn, at which point the spell ends.

14. Druid 12: Use this ASI to max out your Wisdom for all those reasons that are still there since last ASI.

15. Druid 13: Most of your new seventh level spells aren’t super in character, but you can use Symbol to set traps for unsuspecting enemies and leave them scattered about your car. Technically you can’t move an object symbol after you set it, but a surface symbol as no such issue, so it’s time for a paint job. There’s a lot of different symbols, but most of them are very unpleasant for your foes.

16. Druid 14: Your final Shepherd goody turns your car into a Faithful Summons. When you’re reduced to 0 HP or incapacitated, you can instantly use Conjure Animals as a ninth level spell, creating 4 beasts of CR 2 or lower. That’s right, your car really does protect you now. The beasts will automatically defend you and fight against your foes, and the spell doesn’t require concentration. You can do this once per long rest.

17. Druid 15: Seventh level didn’t have much for you, but eighth level spells are a bit better. Antipathy/Sympathy helps your car defend you by repelling creatures from it. You can cast the spell on a huge or smaller object/creature and pick one kind of intelligent creature. Antipathy then forces any named creature within sight or 60′ of the target to make a wisdom save or be frightened while it remains near the car. While frightened, it has to move away from the target until it can’t see it, and it will automatically become frightened again if it moves back into range. If an affected creature ends its turn out of range, it can make another save, if it succeeds, the spell no longer affected and knows about the spell. Creatures that make their save are immune for a minute.

That’s a mouthful, but it’s not the only spell we want here! Tsunami creates a tsunami, creating a wall of water 300′ by 300′ by 50′. Each creature within the wall has to make a strength save, and if they fail they take bludgeoning damage. At the start of your turn after casting the spell, it moves 50′ away, along with creatures inside it. Then all the creatures it ran into/had already make another strength save or take more damage. At the end of each turn the wall moves, it loses 50′ in height and it deals less damage. When the wall is 0 feet tall, the spell ends.

Creatures can try to escape the wall by making an athletics check, but if they fail they can’t move at all.

18. Druid 16: Use your last ASI for a higher Dexterity to get more AC and stronger punches. They pale in comparison to a tsunami, but you can only do that once per day.

19. Druid 17: Congrats, you finally get ninth level spells! Shapechange will let you transform yourself into a true Medjed (assuming you’ve seen one by now). It works similar to your wildshape, but it isn’t limited to beasts and the CR limit is your level. (That being said, you could also turn into a leviathan next level if you’ve seen one, but that’s not in character)

20. Druid 18: Your final level of the build gives you a Timeless Body, reducing your aging by a factor of 10 so you can rule the beaches for centuries to come. You also get Beast Spells so you can cast spells without material components while you’re a beast.

Pros:

You make big waves, and big waves have big areas of effect. You’re very good at pushing around huge groups of people, both thanks to those waves and thanks to your summons.

Another benefit of being a big summoner druid is that you’re tough to get at. If your enemies can get through your medjed swarm you’ve still got an AC of 17/19 and plenty of healing to chew through before they can take you down. And taking you down just makes your medjed army bigger.

While your Awakened Tree car isn’t going to win you any first place medals, you aren’t limited to the one. Think about it- get enough money together and you can pretty much set up a living mobile base, so long as you stay on good terms with the trees propping it up.

Cons:

You are, however, limited to one spell at a time. A lot of your defensive spells and almost all your summons all need your concentration to function, and not only do they blink out of existence if you fail a constitution save, but they also  might attack you!

Those big floody spells you have? They’ll also hit your army. Unlike FGO, your medjed don’t pop back to a pocket dimension when their turn’s over- you’ll have to deal with them getting caught in the waves. That’ll also hurt your standing with the trees, probably.

Until you hit level 17, your best water-based spell is Control Water, which requires water to already exist in the area. You also are probably the only racer who has to make sure their car actually likes them. What I’m trying to say is you have to put up with a lot of fiddly setup to make your powers work as well as they can.

[zee-writes-and-draws]

Truly Important

Summary: A look at some of the more important birthdays that Saw Paing has had, and the one he celebrated right after the tournament.

A/n: It's still July 8th, so I'm on time w/this. Nonetheless, I slept five hours so I apologize for lack of proofreading.

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The first birthday that Saw Paing truly considers important is his fifth one, the day he gets to start Lethwei training for the very first time. He comes home covered in scratches and bruises and a trickle of blood running down his forehead. His father fusses a little and his ma doesn’t let him up until she bandages every little cut and bruise but nothing can spoil his good mood as Ne Win Paing puts him in a headlock and their little sister congratulates him on the start of his training.

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Most birthdays to Saw Paing aren’t majorly important beyond the fact that even as a fighter Pa Paing did his best to see every single child on their birthday every year. But some are important because there’s new people in his life, people who aren't’ there, certain benchmarks and events that are important in and of themselves, but are easier to tie to years and dates and celebrations.

Saw Paing’s sixteenth birthday is remembered fondly only because it is one week before he meets his eternal rival for the very first time, a boy named Gaolang Wongsawat.

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Seventeen. Nothing particularly important. Current youngest brother starts his training that year.

Eighteen. Important solely by the freedom it grants in travelling. Almost all countries recognize eighteen as an age of majority, an age where you can do a lot of things that would be illegal otherwise like go somewhere without an adult’s supervision or rent a car so you have your own transport. Going to places outside of Myanmar and Thailand is the most interesting he’s done in his entire life.

Nineteen. He finally gets a job outside the village. The weapons corporation that hired him is run by an old man and a teenage girl with a vicious streak longer than the destruction radius of the missiles she’s designed. Still, they hired him to safety test things and work to rescue people in afflicted areas, not attack them. It’s Togo Tomari’s brilliant ruthlessness that causes him to end up in the same place as Muteba for a month. Another friendship struck up with someone he’s fought against. A birthday gift of an absolutely gorgeous button-up with twelve patterns and wild color is dropped off at his door that year. Even though the gifter will likely never see it, Saw Paing wears the shirt with pride as often as he can for the next few years.

Twenty. Barely important but it was Gaolang’s eighteenth birthday that year and the time the title ‘God of War’ starts creeping into people’s thoughts about him. Saw Paing cheers his rival on whenever possible.

Twenty-one. Nothing. Little sister asks out crush, dates her for seven months and change before they have to break up because the crush’s family is moving. He and Muteba have each others numbers saved and text between missions.

Twenty-two. He and Ne Win Paing get to fight outside of legal matches for the first time. It’s exhilarating. Their father hugs them both afterwards and tells them how proud he is.

Twenty-three. The first birthday in their family celebrated after Pa Paing passes. It’s somber. Saw Paing would rather have skipped the day entirely if not for how his youngest siblings all seemed determined to follow traditions for at least the illusion of normalcy  and he’s not about to ruin their coping process just because he’s sad. With Ne Win Paing travelling nearly full-time and recovering when he’s home, Saw Paing is the de facto leader of the family and he’s not going to let them down so easily.

That night there’s a card delivered to him by a hassled-looking mail carrier. It’s from Gaolang.

I heard about your father’s death, Saw Paing. My deepest condolences to both you and your family. Take care of yourself. Do what you must to feel more stable.

To anyone else the writing would be cold and impersonal. Saw Paing re-reads it over and over until a drop splashes onto it and the crinkling of paper registers and then he hurriedly folds it and drops it onto the desk in his room so it doesn’t get destroyed.

If in two weeks when they next see each other, Gaolang relents and truly fights Saw Paing for twenty minutes before declaring a defeat form boredom, neither of them acknowledge the change in routine anymore than they acknowledge that Saw Paing’s yelling is more like loud talking and that Gaolang had made an extra plate of his favorite fish seemingly just in case.

------

Twenty-four. Saw Paing meets Sayaka for the very first time that year, a bright and sunshine-sweet teenager who screams out his intro and doesn’t seem to mind that he’s super-loud or that his opponent throws him into the commentators box and nearly crushes her by accident.

When he had apologized she made a joke about it. He made one back. A friendship stronger than any other he’d made was started that day. Sayaka reminds him of his little sisters, friendly and upbeat and ready to take on the world if she has to and come out with a smile, sharp wit and keen mind concealed under a bubbly layer that requires no lying to maintain.

That year his birthday includes a surprise delivery of a completely new set of cookware with a small note attached.

Happy birthday, Saw! Sorry I couldn’t make it, dad scheduled fifty matches for this week alone so I’m not even sleeping, but I hope you like it! See you in May (PS I’m secretly rooting for you!)

That night Saw Paing makes dinner for everyone with said cookware and an unflappable grin on his face.

------

Twenty-five. Nothing.

Twenty-six. His little sister is now formally competing on a near-national level. His brothers, no longer so small but always little in his eyes, work hard to bring in food and water and trade with the local villages and Saw Paing never stops feeling proud of them.

Twenty-seven. More and more fights in the arena. He leaves Tomari’s contracts behind but keeps in touch with Muteba. A chance metal concert allows him to meet Yoshiko, who in turn introduces him to Sawada. Saw Paing mails him several CDs of traditional Burmese music for the other man’s birthday. Gets a collection of ballet remixes in exchange. Listens to the collection every night for weeks and weeks on end until he can whistle half the songs without thinking. Smiles at how many small reminders he has now of the people he cares about.

------

Twenty-eight. The coldest and harshest one yet. Ne Win Paing is not there that year. Everyone’s energy is lower than usual. Saw Paing spends the day mostly taking care of the youngest siblings and visiting the graves of those he’s lost. He can feel the wrongness of this land on his skin, it’s Yoroizuka’s home and that’s better than the alternatives but it is not his home or their home or the home that his family deserved and had grown up in and lost because of Ne Win Paing or maybe because Saw Paing should have noticed sooner, should have caught onto the damage his brother had taken.

Sayaka leaves twenty voicemails and thirty texts, all reassurance and compassion and kindness that Saw Paing is beginning to doubt he deserves. Sawada had arranged for several boxes of their favorite sweets from all over the world to be delivered to his house. Muteba messages him a list of names and places if he needs to fight the emotions out or to talk to a professional specializing in fighters and loss of loved ones and tells him to cherish the rest of his family.

Gaolang visits that evening, sleeplessness evident in his posture and eyebags. It’s rarer and rarer for the two of them to see each other now, between the jobs they both hold and duties they’re bound to. Saw Paing’s first priority will always be his family, just as at the end of the day the Thai God of War is not that but the bodyguard of Prince Rama of Thailand. And yet here they are, sitting next to a firepit just outside a house that was not truly meant for Saw Paing’s family, in a country outside of Gaolang’s own.

“Are you alright?” Gaolang asks him. Saw Paing looks up.

I’ll be fine, he wants to say, thinks instead because even things like talking feel like too much right now. He settles for a nod instead, one that feels too slow and tired to really be him but has to be because who else could he be? Gaolang does not look reassured by this. He sits down next to Saw Paing and talks. That quiet voice, normally at least partially twinged with annoyance and exhaustion, now flows with an undertone of gentle energy. It’s not the fire that Saw Paing usually feels running through his veins. Nor is it Ne Win Paing’s quick fury or Pa Paing’s ruthless confidence.

No, it’s the other kind of energy, the kind that Gaolang always emits though it’s hidden under the day-to-day life’s mundaneness. Gaolang tell him about fights, about what guarding Prince Rama has been like for him, some recipe his parents love and he despises because of how annoyingly spicy it is and how Saw Paing would probably like it. And then he talks about staring into a fire.

“Look,” Gaolang motions at it. “It moves so incredibly, alive and unalive at once.” Saw Paing looks into the fire, watches the moving flames flicker and dance in and out of existence. Next to him, Gaolang smiles.

“It reminds me of you sometimes. The difference is fire burns out. I truly hope you never do.” They sit next to each other, watching for a while until something in Saw Paing’s chest undoes itself, letting some feeling back in. Gaolang notices.

“Tell me about Ne Win Paing,” he asks, shoulder brushing against Saw Paing’s own, warmer than the air around by just enough to be noticeable without feeling too off-balance. And so he does, spilling out every little detail he can remember about his brother and all of the memories that were crafted for as long as he can remember. The sky is light when he finishes, still tired but somehow lighter. That something that had unwound a bit earlier is almost completely gone. He’s still saddened by the loss of one of the greatest people in his life, but things look a little better.

Gaolang leaves then, apologetic but unable to stay. Saw Paing nods at him again to say it’s alright and it must come across sufficiently this time, because Gaolang’s smiling softly as he walks to his car and drives back to his too-loud and too-busy life for such a quiet man and yet a life that couldn’t be anyone else’s.

Saw Paing’s younger siblings are slowly waking up, coming out to check up on him and start their day. He hugs them, feeling his spirit coming back to something normal.

------

Twenty-nine. Still a tad colder than before but mostly better.

Thirty. A year with little occurring beyond the increasing amount of kengan matches and the frequency that he gets to see old friends like Sayaka. The tournament that happens later in the year is undoubtedly something unforgettable that he;ll treasure for the rest of his life. So many new friends made, so many bonds forged and strengthened. He makes it a point to keep correspondence with all of them, even the more quiet ones like Karo and Rei. They clearly need the company if they're quite that quiet.

Thirty-one. He wakes up expecting another birthday that’s rather insignificant. His sisters and brothers in college call and Skype and do whatever else they need to say hello first thing in the morning, yelling through the screen loud enough that he can her the dorm’s complaints through the call. The siblings still at home whether from sentimentality or youth wake him minutes before that by running into his room and wishing a happy birthday to him at the top of their lungs. He’s so proud of their lung training being quite so successful.

He checks his phone after all of the younger siblings hang up out of habit. There’s another twelve messages from various members of the assassin clans he’s befriended, a missed call from Cosmo, a notification about a post from Adam, and an alert of the local post office telling him about several packages that are addressed to him.

On the journey to the post office and back he gets six more calls. As he’s balancing reading a short ‘happy birthday!’ texted to him from Cosmo and a rambly congratulation courtesy of Okubo that is interrupted by an incoming call from either Hanafusa or Yoshizawa, a wonderfully familiar voice calls out.

“Saw! Over here!” Sayaka stands by the edge of the road, looking as red carpet-ready as always, except for the small trolley of boxes and bags she’s keeping from rolling away.

“HEY SAYAKAAAA!!!!!” He yells to her as he runs over. She’s hugging him so there’s no reason not to complete their usual greeting by picking her up and spinning in several circles.

“Happy birthday, Saw!” She laughs as he puts her down. “Sorry I didn’t warn you, but there was a lot of last minute stuff and everyone wanted to send something to you and it was ‘one more thing’ this and ‘oh wait here!’ that, and it’s so great to see you again! Here!” the packages he was holding until two seconds ago are now in Sayaka’s hands, traded for a fancy-looking photo album.

“It’s for you. I wish I could stay, but Retsudo’s been flipping out for six hours and he threatened to send a SAR squad again, but I promise i’ll call this evening, kay? See ya soon, Saw Paing!” She runs to the familiar figures of Takyama and Misasa, waving the whole time they drive away until she’s out of his line of sight. Only tnen does Saw Paing turn his attention to the trolley and the photo album.

Getting everything home requires ignoring messages and calls so his plan to find out what these things are that everyone was so determined to send to him has to wait another hour or so but then he finally has the time to check everything out.

There’s two gorgeous shirts that fit perfectly, bright greens and yellows combining with the soft fabric and reminding him of his old shirt but nicer. This, he knows without even needing to check the card, is a gift that only someone like Muteba would have gotten him. A thick book of various recipes from several different regions in Japan, along with an impressively full binder of leaflet instructions for dishes made in the mountains is sent courtesy of Sekibayashi and Haruo.

A sharp-looking knife that seems to be more familiar with intestines sliding across its blade than vegetables is gifted by the Kures he’d met after Hayami’s rebellion, right next to several ‘free assassination’ coupons Reichii and Fusui must have snuck in as a half-joke and and half-true gift.

Most of the things are actually quite small, just fragile and packaged with an insane amount of cushioning, he realizes. It’s nothing particularly fancy, but they’re all things that will remind him of the senders, be it the scalpel that Hanafusa mailed him with instructions on how to DIY surgery or the old shogi set Kaneda gifts along with a book on most famous shogi strategies played throughout history.

Saw Paing moves everything to where it should be once everything but the photo album has been looked through. The cookbooks go to a specific shelf in the kitchen that no one else can reach. The weapons are hidden in a small box under his bed to avoid any incidents. Muteba’s shirts go onto hangers, Sawada’s fancy candies are set on a plate for eating while looking at this final gift, and then the album is opened.

The first photo makes him smile, a perfect snapshot from one of his earliest fights in the Kengan matches, capturing the moment they had both gone from enemies to friends mid-blow. A date, presumably of when the photo was taken, is written on the border in Sayaka’s neat writing. The second one is of Ne Win Paing from seven years ago. This time, the date is in heavier, blockier writing, not unlike Hollis’s. Saw Paing flips through the album a little more, taking it in. there’s plenty of photos of his various friends, fellow fighters, and even some family from the tournament and before it, but there’s also old photos of his brother and father, and even one of his mother back when she had fought in occasional matches, along with candids of some of the more stoic people. They must have been collected over several months, and not just by Sayaka.

Saw Paing already knows what will happen this evening. Gaolang will come over with some kind of small yet so deeply personal way of also saying happy birthday. Sayaka will call again, most likely throwing a small party in the Katahara house and inviting everyone she can. Rei might stop by and even if he doesn’t, he’ll Skype before the sun sets because he’s a punctual person by both nature and training.

But that’s still hours away, and in the meantime, Saw Paing decides to keep looking at the beautiful snapshots of the past, enjoying the present to it’s fullest.

------

END.

[tooinlovewithfictionalpeople]

Dating the Hargreeves

Luther Hargreeves

-You met when one day you were called to the Hargreeve residence

- Your mother was a friend of Reginald and she had asked you to deliver a letter to him.

- On arriving you noticed how empty the place was

- So as Reginald took the letter from you, he told you to come back in ten minuets when he had written the reply

- Thinking he lived alone now, you just wondered about the house, until you bumped into Luther

- After stating your business, he seemed to warm up to you a lot more, even if he was a tad awkward

- You realised that he was just really lonely

- So you invited him for coffee

- He was so shocked all he could do was nod

- The coffee date went well the next day

- It was all going swimmingly, the two of you were good friends but right as you both were realising your feelings were more than just friends

- His dad sent him to the moon

- Pogo let you message him three times a day

- But you still missed him

- You didn’t understand why he couldn’t disobey orders

- But you respected his choice and waited

- For years

-When he finally came back he was slightly more clingy than he was usually and you two quickly became an item

- He was a broken soul who just needed some love

- And attention

- And to believe he didn’t waste four years of his life

- When you two started dating he was basically your own personal teddy bear

- he’s so warm so if you’re cold he would let you cuddle up to him

- he’d be so gentle because he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt you

- You would constantly be there to remind him to be nice to his siblings

- going stargazing together 

- or moon gazing the guy has an obsession

- You would steal his coat and make brilliant impressions of him, much to the joy of Diego and Klaus

-You are defiantly the smart one so Luther would always go to you for advice

- he’s so protective and will glare at any man who looks your way

- which can get a bit annoying but it’s nothing to bad.

- He’s really insecure so you would constantly assure him that he was beautiful the way he was

- Helping Luther see that dear old Dad was not the nicest guy

- Your best friend is 100% Diego though

- Which Luther hates because if you're mad at him, he’s doomed on all fronts

- He buys you chocolate though so you keep him around

- He has a good heart really

Diego Hargreeves

-You're both vigilantes of sorts

- You're more like a private investigator plus baddass crime stopper

- Police pay you to solve crimes, and then the government pay you even more money to take out pesky people

- It was kinda fun

- You meet Diego when Patch brings him in

- He overhears what job you’re doing and asks why you’re getting paid doing the same thing he’s getting arrested for

- Patch laughs and tells him that you are more of a private investigator

- You smile, thinking that would shut him up 

- But no. He starts calling you Sherlock

- Wearing that stupid smirk as he says it

- Your meetings become more frequent and he always teases you about your job but its nothing more than that

- Until one day he realises you don’t actually have a house, you live in a car

- Because even though your job pays well, you move around a lot and most of you money goes to your sister so she can afford a house, and living with her may but her life at risk

- So he offered the spare bedroom in his apartment 

- He assures you he can take care of himself

- So you agree

- And slowly you adjust your life to be with him

- You take turns cooking at first and then it turns into a you cook whilst he cleans because he cannot cook

- And then he takes you on a date

- He’s a shy stuttering mess when he asks you on a date, nothing like the mischievous confident man you'd known

- It was adorable so you said yes

- Things went really well so you guys decided to date

- He is such a cuddler

- Secretly likes being the little spoon, or sleeping on your stomach because it makes him feel safe

- But also likes being the big spoon because he likes to feel like he’s protecting you

- You’re probably the cook as he can only make eggs

- And even tho “They’re great eggs Y/N,” they’re “Not a balanced diet Diego,”

- Patching him up when he’s on his nightly hero duty things

- If you have work in the morning you will leave cute notes around the house for him to wake up to, and he does the same for you when he works

- When he grows his hair out he secretly lets you braid it as long as you tell no one.

- Until Klaus find’s out and gets you to braid his hair too

- He cannot say no to you, so gets through the day of relentless teasing by his siblings when you painted his nails 

- It was worth it to see you smile

- Full on shouting at Reginald at the dinner table when he upset Diego because HOW DARE HE make your boyfriend stutter like that

- The other siblings looking at you in shock because you were the calm and reasonable one 

- He wouldn’t really get jealous because he trusted you, but can’t resist showing off the fact you’re his girlfriend when someone starts to flirt with you

- Okay maybe he is jealous

Allison Hargreeves 

- For some reason you are immune to her power

- You found this out when Reginald tried to forcefully recruit you to the academy when you were fifteen, using her power and you just responded “I don’t know where you heard that sunshine.”  before merrily skipping off.

- She was shook

- The two of you started meeting at Griddy’s donuts

- At first she wanted to know how you managed to get away

- But eventually she started to like you

- You were sassy and smart and didn’t put up with her shit

- This is probably why Five adored you so much - you two became best friends

- She always held your hand and often kissed it softly if you were deep in thought

- You taught her how to get people to do what you say without using her power

- Which meant you guys left with a lot of free stuff

- She always loved to show you off, PDA was something she had no problem with

- Much to the disgust of some of the siblings

- Being in the 60′s as a lesbian couple was difficult

- So you pretended to be cousins

- which was weird for both of you

- She would constantly buy extravagant gifts for you, especially when she had the money

- Despite the fact that in public you seem like the one in charge, she is 100% the big spoon

- She likes the feeling of feeling truly needed

Klaus Hargreeves

- You meet in the war, you’re the bar tender that introduced him to Dave

- The talk he had with you was very brief but he remembered your face

- So years later, when he went back to that same Bar once he got back from the past he was shocked to see you serving people having not aged a day

- At first he thought you just has really good genes you had passed on but you were identical to the way he remembered you

- The he thought he was seeing your ghost but he saw that you were interacting with others

- So he called you over

- You didn't seem shocked to see him but pleasantly surprised

- You explained that you had gotten in a bit of a pickle as you were picking up a suitcase from the commission so you could retire but Five blew the place up causing the suitcase to malfunction

- So you were stuck in a warzone until you figured out how to fix the case

- You also told Klaus to give his brother a slap when he next saw him

- He did, but Five was very pleased to see you as you were a good friend to him and knew how to help

- Anyways after a couple of soft drinks you and Klaus got to know each other better

- And after a while the two of you became an item and life just got better

Helping him remain sober

- Cuddles all the time because he is needy

- you guys shared clothes because neither if you give a fuck

- You show him other ways to get high without damaging his body

- like taking him skydiving or to a theme park

- you always listen to him

- And will shout at the siblings when they undermine Klaus

- You keep the ghosts at bay, and will often hold him when he sleeps so stop any nightmares

- However neither of you can cook

- which leads to you waltzing off to Allison’s house at three in the morning because she can cook

- She doesn’t mind though because she’s never seen her brother this happy when hes sober

- You are best friends with Ben, and can also see and hear him so like to talk shit about Klaus when he’s in the room

- He is a pro at forehead kisses

- He’ll wrap you in his arms and just lightly kiss your forehead

- Because you make him feel safe, so he returns the favour

Five Hargreeves

- You worked with the commission as an assassin and after a few weeks of Five being there, he was told that you would be his partner

- He was a little annoyed because that would mean he wouldn’t be able to work on the apocalypse on the job in case you told on him

- Then he met you and you were nothing like he expected

- He’d seen you train, seen you kill five men whilst barely moving and go after the most dangerous of people

- So why were you so nice?

-You were like a little ball of sunshine and he was Mr grumpy

- When you were informed that he had been alone for 45 years, Five thought you’d run away from him, scared that you were friends with a madman

- But instead you walked up to him and wrapped your arms around his waist

- At first he didn’t know how to respond but then he hugged you back

- And then you two became inseparable

- He wasn’t much into PDA especially when you got back to the Hargreaves siblings

- He didn’t want to be bullied

-But you loved affection

-So he compromised and the two of you would subtly lock pinkies

-But that was it

-Until you were alone

-Oh boy

- He needed coaxing at first because he’s socially awkward

- But he loves to be cuddled. He loves laying on your stomach, or holding you against his chest or wrapping his arms around your waist

- He’s a sucker for when you run your hands through his hair

- It makes him w e a k 

-When he’s working you’ll sit on his lap

- Because you want attention and he overworks himself

- You constantly look after him, making sure he drinks water and shit

- Because you cannot run on coffee alone

- The siblings become suspicious when they catch Five staring at you

- So they decided to spy on him

- And whilst they spied, they saw their mardy little brother dancing (Rather gracefully) around the Kitchen with you, both laughing as if there was no one else there

- Which tbf they didn’t think there was

- “They could just be working a case?” suggested Luther

- But that was quickly brushed aside when Five kissed you

- “Turns out the Hargreaves are capable of Love,” was all Klaus said although they were secretly thrilled at the fact you and Five were together.

Ben Hargreeves

- You were just a small town waitress 

- Working another long shift at your work, you saw two men come in, one rather skinny and hippie looking, and the other dressed in all black

- You’re a naturally sweet person so serving them with a smile wasn’t a problem

- But when you asked Ben what he wanted he just froze in shock

- After some explaining you decided to let the two guys stay at your apartment for a while, as they were lost anyway

- You all became super super close

- You helped Klaus become sober again

- And then you realised that not only could you see Ben, but you could make him physically there just by touching him

- You learnt this when you accidentally ran into him nearly knocking yourself out

- The Klaus was no longer the clingy one

-Ben was always touching you, not in a weird way just always brushing hands or wrapping himself around you

- He loved cuddles, just feeling warm for once

- He’d cuddle you no matter what, and if you had a tiring day at work he would be there to sweep you off your feet

- you made him feel alive again

- When he was touching you others could see him too

- which meant you automatically became the family favourite, after you helped Klaus, and then Ben

- Ben loves it when you read to him, it just calms him down

- His favourite thing to do is to sit in the park with you sat between his legs, lent against his chest listening to you read

- He wears the flower crowns you make with pride

- It takes ages to figure out why you can see him and make him real as you were actually a couple months younger than him

- Turns out you had died as a baby for exactly 108 seconds and that had left you with ties to both the physical world and the afterlife - and it was Mr Reginald Hargreeves who had saved you

- You were convinced he was an alien but the others disagreed

- You helped Ben not fear his power

- The guy is king of nose kisses. He just finds it really cute when you scrunch your nose, either in disgust or frustration or confusion

- You always kiss jawline, as if you’re snuggled together it’s often the only place you can reach

- Vanya is your best friend, you always invite her because she understands what it’s like to not know the extent of your own power

- Klaus is scared at first because he doesn’t want Ben to leave him although he would never admit it

- But then he realised he hadn’t lost a constant companion, he’d just gained another

- Ben loves to surprise you with cute simple things, like setting up a movie and hot chocolate, or picking out flowers he found at some point for you

- Dancing round the kitchen would be a daily thing

- You even got Five to join in 

- You make the best waffles so every morning all the siblings come to your house just to eat the waffles you make

- It’s like they are a family again, but this time they have you

Vanya Hargreeves

- She’s a bit iffy with personal contact

- It makes her a little nervous

- But you’re okay with that, she shows her love in other ways

- Like she’ll always make you tea in the mornings, or make sure you’re under the blanket before she sleeps because she knows you get cold

- You meet for the first time when you’re kids. The other siblings are saving everybody and ask you to stand with the others, because to them you’re just a civilian

- But when things start to go sideways, it’s you who helps them, using your powers of mental manipulation to make the bad guys visualise their worst fear

- Sir Hargreeves takes you in immediately, adopting you as Number Eight.

-The other kids felt bad for you when Reginald left you on your own, and it was Klaus who spoke

-”He’s not a good parent, he isn’t really here at all so I’m sorry if this wasn't what you were expecting,” but you were happy

“My real dad gave me this scar when he tried to stab me,” you replied with a little laugh “Ill take yours any day,”

-After that you and Vanya bonded over the fact you were both the black sheep of the family

- You always made sure she was included, and felt a bit bad that you weren’t a sibling but were often invited to more places than her

- During your teenage years you and Vanya clearly had something going on, so Reginald sent you away to France to study your powers

- It wasn’t until his death did you two see each other again

- It felt like you had never really left and things kicked off again

- But the Harold came along and told Vanya you were just as bad as the rest

- So she abandoned you

- You meet  for the third time in the 60′s, you’re staying with a married couple and their disabled son

- Vanya recognises you but she doesn’t know where from which breaks your heart slightly but it’s okay

- Because the more she spends time with you the more she falls in love with you

- She finally asks you to be her girlfriend

- Which you say yes

- Although she’s not big on affection, she loves it when you lay in her lap, it makes her feel trusted

- She loves to play the violin for you

- When she starts to grow used to affection, she loves it when you sleep all curled up beside her like a cat

- Or when you play with her hair

- Or kiss her cheek

- You make her feel like she’s valid and that’s all she ever wanted

[more-stuff-of-pi]

Believe Because He is Good

a/n: I’ve been thinking of writing something like this and I read these beauties by @volleychumps and was inspired to just write out what was in my head. This is very much a self-comfort fic regarding my personal experience, ofc featuring my og hq mans :)

notes: y/e/n = your ex’s name. requests are open :) find my masterlist here

pairing: sawamura daichi x fem!reader | genre: angst (w/happy ending) | warnings: asshole exes, implied past abuse (emotional, manipulation, slight physical), implied panic/anxiety attack | word count: 2,395

Balls were bouncing off the court, slapping the wood as Karasuno wound down, practicing serves. Even Noya tried his hand at serving, the ball smacking into the net. Tanaka laughed at Noya, ceasing when a volleyball knocked into his head. The culprit, Hinata, squeaked as Tanaka scrambled after him, Noya roaring with laughter all the while, gripping Asahi’s arm as he in turn knitted his brows together. Tsukishima rolled his eyes as Yamaguchi hid a giggle behind a hand.

Despite the chaos of Karasuno, an immense feeling of pure joy washed over you as you stood in the doorway of the gym. Nothing felt quite like seeing the team together. Their bond and their energy always lifted your spirits. And, of course, the handsome captain was the cherry on top.

“Great work today, guys!” Daichi called out to his team, signalling that practice was well over. They started to casually saunter over, Suga coming to take his place as vice next to his captain. “We’ve got a practice -- Nishinoya, Tanaka, shut it -- we’ve got a practice match next week, so I wanna see you all working hard to be ready. Shimizu and Yachi left early to run some errands for Sensei, so please do your best in cleaning up. Alright, get to it!” Daichi clapped, releasing the group to their chores.

As the group dwindled, you watched as Suga tapped Daichi’s arm and jutted his head in your direction. Confused, Daichi glanced towards you and instantly his face melted from slight exhaustion into absolute adoration. He bid goodbye to Suga who clapped him on the back with a mischievous grin in return, causing Daichi to cough.

You giggled, waving to Suga whose grin widened as he threw a peace sign up before turning to do his part in cleaning up. Daichi joined you at your place by the door, lightly touching a hand to your hip, leaning down to peck your lips in greeting.

“Hi, Y/n,” he welcomed warmly as he smoothly laced your hands together as if it were second nature.

“Hi yourself,” you replied. “Shimizu told me you’d need some help cleaning today.”

He sighed and shook his head. “Still, you didn’t have to come.”

“No,” you agreed, entertaining a wicked grin, “but I heard the captain of this team was really hot so I just had to come see for myself.”

Daichi grinned at your teasing. “Well, you should see the captain’s girlfriend. I heard that she’s a real looker.”

“Mhmm,” you hummed, leaning in for another kiss which Daichi gladly gave. “So what can I help you with, Mr. Team Captain? Because with these boys you will most certainly need it.”

Daichi huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, you’re telling me.” He looked around, scanning the gym for a task you could take up. “Ah! You could take care of the water bottles, if you wouldn't mind.”

“Just dump them out, yeah?” Daichi nodded. “Seems simple enough. I’ll go do that and then when we’re done here we could go out for meat buns, maybe.”

“You struck another craving, haven’t you?”

“Your treat!” you teased in answer, snatching up the carton of bottles and escaping from the gym before Daichi could reply. Stepping out, you begin absentmindedly busying yourself with unscrewing the lids of each bottle as you make your way to the outdoor sinks. Focused on the task, you don’t notice the person in front of you until you’re crashing into them, effectively spilling the water you were on your way to empty. Well, that’s one way to do it.

“Oh, my gosh,” you crouched down, quickly picking up the bottles, “I am so so--” 

“Hi, Y/n,” the boy said, looking down at you with a tight lipped smile. He was a year your junior and also your ex. You had broken up with him at the beginning of summer vacation but had fortunately not seen him since, even through several months into the school year. You had foolishly hoped that your luck would continue and you would miraculously not ever see him again. But he was also a student at Karasuno and shared not only many of your extracurricular interests but also a handful of friends, of whom were responsible for setting you two up in the first place. What they didn’t know is that they were setting you up for disaster.

The relationship had started with no base friendship or really any genuine knowledge of the other besides the words of others from the grape vine. In retrospect, it was a plain bad idea. You two had fun at first but soon into your relationship, your boyfriend had begun pressuring you. He started with little things, subtly manipulating you until it was hard for you to recognize what your own boundaries genuinely were, as blurry as he made the lines. He was cunning and cornered you into situations you didn’t want to be in as easily as he could talk. He never complimented you, never made an effort for you, never validated you. Normally, you would stand up for yourself, speak out against this mistreatment, but something about him made you weak. And not in that head over heels kinda weak. The type of weak that drained you, that made you doubt yourself where you wouldn’t have before, that twisted your own strengths to look like hindrances.

It seems that even after months apart, he still had that same, nauseating effect on you.

“Hi, Y/e/n.” You forced a pretty smile, trying your best to stay polite and to ignore all of the sudden flowing emotions, not wanting to admit to him -- nor yourself -- that the damage he had done was still raw. “Sorry about that, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

“Still ever the clutz,” he laughed, something cruel and mocking.

You grit your teeth, smile impossibly tight. Whatever semblance of sanity you had left pleading for you to remain polite. “I’m sorry. Now if you’ll excuse me--”

He abruptly put a hand on your shoulder to stop you. “Where’re you heading?” The thinly coated politeness was easy to see through when you had suffered through the consequences of believing it.

“To rinse these.” You lifted the carton of now mostly empty water bottles. You went to move past him and tried to brush off his hand, but it only tightened, his thumb painfully digging into the dip between your shoulder and your collarbone. You inhaled shapely at the resulting shock and pain.

The movement reminded you of other times he had done this subtle control, other times he had wanted you to just shut up and comply, other times he coerced you, forced you--

“Why don’t I accompany you, hm? It’s been awhile since we’ve had the opportunity to chat. Let’s catch up,” he said with a toothy smile that even his eyes carried. The familiarity of this compelled you to learned submissiveness, breaths desperately trying to claw their way from your throat. You tried to swallow them down, but they were clawing faster than you could handle.

“I have a job to do, Y/e/n.” Your voice sounded weak, even to your own ears. You weren’t fooling him. 

His thumb dug even harder. “C’mon it’s the least you can do after purposely spilling that water all over me--”

“It was an accident--!”

He raised his other hand, going in to grab your arm -- to gain more control over you -- when someone caught his wrist.

“What do you think you’re doing?” A voice said quietly, eerily so. Despite that, under its influence and familiarity, an intense calm washed over you, wrapping you in comfort and relief.

Turning, the image that greeted you of Daichi’s wrath was that of an angel of death, beautiful and fearsome in all of his glory. In his eyes he held enough heat to burn the ends of the earth. And it was all for you.

Your ex shook his wrist from Daichi’s grasp, trying to subtly shake it out. His grip on your shoulder loosened though he didn’t pull away. “I’m just catching up with an old… friend,” he spat, his polite veil thinly covering his malice.

“I’ve never known old friends to hurt each other in greeting.” Daichi was fuming, to say the least. Whatever you had against your ex, you were amazed at his sincere idiocracy. That, or his delusionment that he could genuinely stand level to Daichi.

“I wasn’t hurting her,” he sneered, “I was just saying hi.”

“You could do that without putting your hands on her. I suggest you take them off.”

Your ex snorted and glanced down at you, his hand squeezing reflexively. “Are you really just going to cower there and let him speak for you? You were always telling me what to do, I’m surprised you’re actually staying quiet.” You instinctively flinched away from him, tears threatening to sting your eyes. You knew he was wrong, that he was trying to hurt you, but that broken part of you couldn’t help but believe him.

Daichi, from the corner of his eyes, saw your distressed state, the sight causing his heart to lurch. In his eyes, you were absolutely incredible. So kind and giving and loving and it angered him to no end that anyone would be able to make you believe anything otherwise. He loved you, so incredibly much and he wanted nothing more than to protect you and keep loving you.

“Get off of me,” you whispered, trying to convince yourself that your ex no longer had any control over you.

Your ex smiled wickedly, finally taking his hand off. “There you go, sweetheart. All you had to do was ask.”

“And all you had to do was leave,” Daichi seethed.

“Sorry?” Your ex asked lamely.

“You’ve had your stupid fun, now leave. I’m giving you five seconds.” You looked at Daichi and almost flinched away from the absolute hatred burning in his features. The fire that was there before had grown impossibly hotter.

He laughed. Your asshole ex actually laughed in Daichi's face. "And what will you do?"

"Stay longer than five seconds and find out." As much as Daichi was wonderful and patient and mature, if something really got him going, he threw that all out the window. And perhaps that was Daichi's one fault. That he would gladly abandon reason when it came to you.

"Really?"

"Daichi," you breathed, "he's not worth it."

"No," your boyfriend agreed, "he's not. But it would be so satisfying." Without warning, Daichi lunged and gripped the front of your ex's shirt, pulling the shorter boy roughly to be chest to chest with him. Your ex gulped audibly, his tough persona crumbling away far too easily at a single physical touch. Granted, an angry Daichi held all the fury in the world barely contained in a wall of muscle. Even the word intimidating would be too much of an understatement. "Don't you ever touch her again. Don't look at her, don't talk to her -- in fact, stay far away from her," he snarled, boiling over like an animal on the hunt. He threw your ex away from him. You watched as he stumbled, tripping over his own feet and landing harshly on his ass. Daichi took advantage of this, squatting down over him before leaning in and whispering, "your five seconds are long gone. You can either leave or stay and find out what I can do."

Your ex glanced between you and Daichi, defiance somehow still lingering in his features. Seeing Daichi, though, had given you some courage and confidence as being around him often did. You believed in yourself again, just enough to look your ex in the eyes.

"Goodbye, Y/e/n."

He scrambled from his place on the ground (where he surely belonged, you thought bitterly) and disappeared from sight. You gasped for air, relieved he was gone, the anxiety that threatened to overtake you flooding from your body.

Daichi immediately turned to you, worry and love replacing the wrath in his eyes. "Can I hold you?"

"Please," you gasped, tears that rarely ever came already spilling silently down your cheeks.

With your permission, Daichi rushed from his crouch, pulling you gently to him as his hand came up to card through your hair. You clung onto him, holding him impossibly closer as you sobbed into his chest. He pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head, pushing hair that had fallen into your face behind your ear. You leaned into his touch, revelling in the love and comfort he provided.

"I love you, Y/n," he said as you lifted your gaze to meet his searching one, "I love you so much. I'm sorry you ever had to deal with that but… but I'm so glad that I'm here with you."

"I'm glad you're here with me, too," you sniffled, wiping at your face. "Where's everyone else?"

"Gone," he replied and you noticed for the first time that he was already changed out of his gym clothes. Just behind you was his discarded bag. "Suga and Asahi went on ahead. I thought it was odd that you didn't ever come back in so I came to check on you."

"I'm glad you did."

Daichi smiled softly. "I am too."

"I'm sorry you had to step in. I don't know why I couldn't handle it, I usually can it's just-- he--"

"Hey, hey," he lifted his other hand to your face, holding you as he gently coaxed you to look at him, "you have nothing to be sorry for."

"But--"

"No buts. You did a great job. You can't just erase what he did to you or how he made you feel. You're allowed to react the way you did, Y/n. Okay?"

You nod. "Okay."

Daichi smiled warmly. "Good. Now how about we put those bottles away and we go out for meat buns."

"Your treat?"

Daichi laughed, the sweet sound bringing a smile to your lips. "Yeah, my treat." He laced his fingers through yours, still grinning.

"Daichi?"

"Hm?" he hummed.

"Thank you. I love you."

His smile softened as he leaned down, kissing you softly. "I love you too, Y/n."

And because it was him, because Daichi was so kind and charming and good, you truly believed him.

taglist: @samwrights (ily mom)