#like they took the most bad faith takes with her and it makes me genuinely so sad

[glamjrwi]

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[sinful-mind-joyful-thoughts]

𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝕿𝖊𝖒𝖕𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘 | 6

read chapter 1 - here [MASTERLIST]

screencaps and gifs: Pinterest and @pedgito

Pairing: dark!Joel Miller x Fem!reader

Warnings/tags: MDNI 18+, DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT,DUB/NON-CON, Auctioning people, Dom and Sub dynamics, Drinking, food, kissing, possessiveness, flirting, praise, Orgasums, manipulation, burns, Bondage (with a belt), strip tease, thigh riding, riding, punishments, hair pulling, Orgasum denial, Degrading, breeding kink?maybe a lil, UNprotected sex wrap it before you tap it kids, THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CONTENT YOU CONSUME

Summary: Faith drops a ball and you try and take some control over Joel

WC: 5.6k

A/n: Hehe...switch Joel? also this took a sec because i originally wrote it completely different but big big shout out too @underthechemtrails who read one of the first editions she was an amazing help when it came to well everything luv ya pookie

For notifications follow - @sinful-mind-joyful-fics

“Faith,” you giggled as she told you about the prank she pulled on Tommy, the warmth of her laughter making your heart feel lighter. You had Faith on speakerphone, the sounds of sizzling food and clinking utensils filling your small kitchen as you prepared dinner, waiting for Joel to come home.

“He was so mad, but it was worth it,” Faith chuckled. “What about you? How have you been holding up?”

You sighed, a mixture of exhaustion and relief in your voice. “I’ve been okay. Classes are going well, and I’m almost finished with my most recent painting. It’s been a good distraction.”

“That’s great to hear,” Faith replied, her tone softening with genuine care. “And Joel? How are things with him?”

You hesitated, your fingers pausing over the chopping board. “It’s been... complicated. We had this intense encounter a few days ago, and it’s been hard to shake off. It felt more like a punishment than anything else.”

You hesitated, your fingers pausing over the chopping board as you chopped vegetables for the spaghetti sauce. “It’s been... complicated. We had this intense encounter a few days ago, and it’s been hard to shake off. It felt more like a punishment than anything else.”

Faith laughed softly, thinking it was a joke. “A punishment? Sounds kinky. What did he do?”

You took a deep breath, feeling a knot in your stomach. “I said no to something, and he didn’t listen. He forced himself on me and made me... well, it was a blowjob. It felt like he was punishing me for saying no.”

There was a stunned silence on the other end of the line. When Faith spoke again, her voice was much more serious. “Wait, what? He forced you? That’s not okay. That’s not a punishment, that’s... that’s assault.”

You swallowed hard, the reality of her words hitting you. “I didn’t think of it that way. I just felt... helpless.”

Faith’s tone softened, filled with concern. “Oh, honey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize it was like that. I thought it was a consensual thing. Are you okay?”

You stopped cooking, setting the knife down as you tried to keep your composure. “I don’t know. I’ve been trying to make sense of it. I didn’t want to believe it was that bad.”

Faith’s voice was gentle but firm. “You shouldn’t have to deal with this alone. You deserve to feel safe.”

Taking a deep breath, you steadied yourself. “Faith, can I ask you something?”

"Of course," Faith replied, her tone encouraging. "What’s on your mind?"

"Do you and Tommy have a safe word?" you asked, the words feeling foreign on your tongue.

Faith paused for a moment before answering. "Yes, we do. Safe words are essential in any kind of BDSM or kink relationship. Do you and Joel have one?"

"No," you admitted, feeling a bit embarrassed. "I read about them in an article when I was trying to figure out something new to try with Joel. The article mentioned safe words when it talked about bondage, but I didn’t really understand what it meant."

Faith’s laughter was warm and reassuring. "That’s okay. A safe word is a word or phrase that you and your partner agree on, which means ‘stop’ immediately. It’s used to communicate when something is too much or if you’re uncomfortable. It’s different from just saying ‘no’ because sometimes in roleplay, saying ‘no’ can be part of the game. The safe word is a clear signal that the scene needs to stop right away."

"Oh," you said, feeling a bit more enlightened. "So it’s like a safety net?"

"Exactly," Faith confirmed. "It’s there to ensure that both partners feel safe and respected. It’s crucial in maintaining trust. If you’re ever feeling overwhelmed, you use the safe word, and everything stops."

You nodded, even though Faith couldn’t see you, feeling a bit more at ease. "That makes sense. I guess I need to talk to Joel about that."

Faith’s voice took on a more serious tone. "Absolutely. And make sure you’re clear about what you’re comfortable with and what you want to explore. Speaking of which, is there something specific you want to try?"

You hesitated, feeling a bit nervous. "Well, actually, yes. I read about bondage, and I kind of want to try it, but I’d like to be the one in control. I want Joel to be the one tied up."

There was a brief pause before Faith responded, her voice laced with excitement. "Ooh, that sounds interesting! But I get why you’re nervous. You want to make sure he’s open to it and understands your boundaries."

"Exactly," you said, feeling a bit more relieved. "How do I bring it up without making it awkward or seeming like I’m trying to change things too much?"

Faith chuckled softly. "Well, first of all, it’s all about timing. Find a moment when you’re both relaxed and open to talking. Maybe after dinner, when you’re both in a good mood. Start by talking about your relationship and how much you value it, then ease into the topic of trying new things."

You nodded, making a mental note of her advice. "Okay, that sounds doable. And then what?"

"Be honest and direct," Faith advised. "Tell him you’ve been reading about different aspects of intimacy and that you’re curious about trying bondage. Explain that you’d like to experiment with being the one in control and see how he feels about it. Make sure he knows it’s about exploring together and that you value his comfort and boundaries too."

"That makes sense," you said, feeling a bit more confident. "I just hope he’s open to it."

Faith's voice took on a nostalgic tone. "You know, the one time I was with Joel, I actually tied him up. He was surprisingly okay with it. He was more of a guide, really, helping me feel comfortable while still letting me take control. It was... nice, in a way."

You blinked in surprise, the spoon in your hand pausing mid-stir. "He was tied up? And he was okay with that?"

"Yeah," Faith confirmed, her voice growing more somber. "He was open to it. But there’s something I need to tell you." She took a deep breath, her tone shifting from nostalgic to serious. "That night, Joel punished me too. It was consensual at first, but it got a bit intense. He didn’t listen to my safe word."

You felt a chill run down your spine, the spoon slipping from your fingers into the pot. "Faith, why didn’t you tell me about this before?"

Faith sighed heavily, the sound filled with regret. "Honestly? I didn’t want to worry you. You seemed so happy with him, and I hoped that maybe he was different with you. But hearing you talk about how he’s been... it brings back some memories."

You turned off the stove, giving Faith your full attention. "You should have told me. I need to know these things."

"I know," Faith admitted, her voice tinged with a sadness that was rarely there. "I should have. But I just... didn’t want to cloud your view of him if he was treating you well. Now that I know he’s been rough with you too, I’m worried."

You felt a surge of conflicting emotions. "It’s okay, Faith. I understand why you didn’t. But it’s important for me to know."

Faith took a deep breath, her voice steadying. "You’re right. And I’m sorry. It’s just... hard to talk about. But you need to know that if he hasn’t changed and he’s being... rapey, you need to call me. I’ll drop everything to come get you."

You felt a knot of fear and gratitude in your chest. "Okay. I promise I will."

"Good," Faith said, her voice softening slightly. "Now, about this bondage thing... Start with the safe word. And be honest about wanting to try bondage but wanting him to be the one tied up. He might surprise you, but if he pushes back in a way that makes you uncomfortable, don’t ignore it."

You took a deep breath, feeling a mix of determination and fear. "Okay. I’ll talk to him. And if things go south, I’ll call you."

"Promise me you will," Faith urged. "No matter what."

"I promise," you said, feeling a sense of relief knowing she was there for you.

"Good," Faith said warmly. "And remember, you deserve to feel safe and respected. Don’t let anyone take that away from you."

"Thanks, Faith," you said, your voice trembling slightly. "I appreciate you being here for me."

"Always," Faith replied with a comforting tone. "Now go finish dinner and have that talk. You’ve got this."

You hung up the phone, Faith's words echoing in your mind. Her confession had left you feeling a mixture of relief and unease. As you turned back to the stove, you tried to focus on finishing dinner, but your thoughts kept drifting back to the conversation.

Suddenly, the front door creaked open. You jumped, the unexpected noise startling you. Joel was home early. His heavy footsteps echoed through the hallway, and you could smell the earthy scent of sweat and construction dust before you saw him.

"Hey," Joel called out as he stepped into the kitchen. His voice was gruff but filled with a hint of warmth.

Startled, you accidentally knocked the spoon against the pot, causing hot sauce to splash onto your hand. You yelped in pain, instinctively pulling your hand away and clutching it to your chest.

Joel's eyes widened in concern as he quickly closed the distance between you. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"It’s nothing," you managed through gritted teeth, trying to downplay the pain. "I just burned myself."

Without another word, Joel gently took your hand, examining the burn with a furrowed brow. He was still dirty from work, the scent of dirt and sweat mingling with the kitchen aromas. Despite his rough appearance, his touch was tender as he guided you to the sink.

"Let’s get this under some cold water," he said softly, turning on the tap and holding your hand under the stream. The cool water provided instant relief, but your heart was still racing from the shock of his sudden arrival and the sting of the burn.

"Thanks," you murmured, glancing up at him. His face was etched with concern, and for a moment, you saw a different side of him—a side that cared deeply about your well-being.

Joel nodded, his expression softening. "You need to be more careful." His voice was gentle, a stark contrast to the usual roughness you were accustomed to.

You nodded, feeling a lump form in your throat. "I know. I just got distracted."

Joel glanced at the stove, then back at you. "I can finish dinner if you want to take a break."

"No, it’s okay," you replied, pulling your hand back once the pain had subsided. "I’ll finish it."

He hesitated, then nodded. "Alright. Just be careful."

You returned to the stove, but Joel didn’t leave your side. His presence was both comforting and intimidating, and you found yourself struggling to focus. You stirred the pot absentmindedly, your mind still reeling from your conversation with Faith and the sudden shift in your evening.

"Joel," you began hesitantly, feeling the weight of the upcoming conversation. "There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about."

He looked at you, his eyes narrowing slightly. "What is it?"

You took a deep breath, summoning the courage you needed. "I’ve been reading about BDSM dynamics, and I realized we don’t have a safe word. I think it’s something we need to establish to ensure we both feel safe and respected."

Joel’s expression shifted, a mixture of surprise and defensiveness. “A safe word? Why do we need that? I’ve never done anything to make you uncomfortable. Everything I do is to make you feel good.”

You felt a knot tighten in your stomach. “But sometimes it feels too intense, like the other night. I want to make sure we have a way to stop if it’s too much.”

He crossed his arms, his posture becoming more rigid. “Why are you even researching this stuff? You can come to me with any concerns. You don’t need to look things up online.”

“I just wanted to understand better,” you explained, trying to keep your voice steady. “I thought it would help us communicate more clearly.”

Joel’s eyes darkened, his tone accusatory. “Is this Faith’s idea? She’s the one with the problem, not us. I don’t need her planting doubts in your head.”

You swallowed hard, feeling the intensity of his gaze. “It’s not just about Faith. It’s about making sure we both feel safe and respected.”

Joel shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. “Of course, it’s Faith. She’s never liked me. Remember how she repacked your suitcase, telling you what to bring and what not to? She’s always trying to control you. Why do you listen to her?”

You felt a pang of frustration and sadness. “Joel, Faith is just concerned about me. She wants me to be safe and happy.”

“She wants you to doubt me,” he snapped, his voice rising. “She’s always been trying to drive a wedge between us. Can’t you see that? She’s manipulating you.”

You turned back to the stove, trying to focus on the spaghetti rather than his words. “Joel, this isn’t about Faith. This is about us and making sure our relationship is healthy.”

“She doesn’t respect me,” he continued, ignoring your attempt to steer the conversation. “She’s always undermining me, filling your head with nonsense. Why can’t you see that she’s the problem?”

You took a deep breath, fighting to keep your voice steady. “Joel, I’m not going to cut Faith out of my life. She’s my friend, and she cares about me. But this conversation is about us establishing boundaries and making sure we both feel safe.”

Joel’s expression hardened, his eyes narrowing. “Boundaries? We never needed boundaries before she started meddling.”

You sighed, trying to keep your composure as you placed the plates of spaghetti on the table. “This isn’t about Faith meddling. It’s about us communicating better. Can we please just sit down and talk about this calmly?”

Joel pushed his chair back, standing up abruptly. “No,” he said flatly. “Put my dinner in the microwave. I need to get cleaned up.”

You blinked in surprise, feeling a rush of anxiety. “Joel, we need to talk about this.”

He ignored you, heading for the kitchen door. “You know, I paid for your college tuition with that $300,000. It was your money, and I assumed you’d use it for that anyway. And I had my accountant merge our bank accounts. It makes things easier for both of us.”

Your heart pounded in your chest, a wave of fear and confusion washing over you. “What? Joel, you can’t just merge our accounts without talking to me first!”

He turned back, his expression cold. “Why are you getting so defensive? I’m just trying to take care of you.”

The words hit hard, knocking the wind out of you. You struggled to steady your voice, but it wavered. "Joel, that's a major decision. You should have discussed it with me. I feel like you're making all the decisions without considering me."

He scoffed and shook his head dismissively before walking away from the kitchen doorway. You felt your head spinning as panic surged through you. How could he make such decisions without even consulting you? It wasn't just about merging bank accounts; it was about him asserting his will without considering your feelings. 

Just as you were setting the last plate on the table, Joel returned to the kitchen, his hair still damp from the shower, which made him look unusually handsome with droplets of water catching the light. "Is my dinner ready?" His tone was demanding, carrying an air of authority that unsettled you further.

You nodded, trying to keep your voice steady. “Yes, I put it in the microwave for you.”

Joel walked over to the microwave, opening it and taking out his plate. The scent of the spaghetti filled the room as he set his plate down. He gave you a brief, appreciative look. “Dinner smells great, sweetheart,” he said, his voice softening slightly. “You always know how to make the perfect sauce.”

You managed a small smile, though it felt forced. “Thanks, Joel. I’m glad you like it.”

He took a few bites, nodding appreciatively. "Where did you hear about this ‘safe word’ stuff anyway?"

You swallowed hard, choosing your words carefully. "I’ve been doing some research on BDSM. I was specifically looking into bondage and came across the concept of safe words. It seems important, especially for trust and communication."

Joel’s eyes narrowed slightly, but he kept his tone neutral. "Researching, huh? And what made you want to look into that?"

You glanced down at your plate, feeling a mix of anxiety and determination. "I wanted to explore more. I felt ready to try new things, and I thought it would be good for us to have clear boundaries. It’s about making sure we both feel comfortable and respected."

Joel leaned back in his chair, studying you intently. "And you think we need this because of what happened the other night?"

You nodded, feeling a lump in your throat. "Yes. I want to feel safe, and I want you to feel safe too. It’s about mutual respect and trust."

He sighed, setting his fork down and leaning forward slightly, his gaze locking onto yours. "I’ve never done anything to make you uncomfortable on purpose. Everything I’ve done was to make you feel good."

You bit your lip, trying to find the right words. "I know, Joel. But sometimes, things can go too far without meaning to. A safe word would give us both a way to stop if it ever gets to be too much."

Joel's expression softened as he reached across the table, his fingers brushing yours. "I get what you’re saying, but you should have come to me with this first. We don’t need outside influences like Faith planting doubts."

You took a deep breath, feeling a mixture of relief and lingering anxiety. "This isn’t about Faith. This is about us. I need to know that if I say no or if something is too much for me, you’ll respect that."

Joel’s grip on your hand tightened slightly, his touch firm but not unkind. "You’ll want for nothing, you know that, right? I’m just trying to take care of us, make things easier."

You looked down at his hand, then back up at him, feeling a knot of unease in your stomach. "I appreciate everything you do, Joel. But we need to make decisions together. I need to feel like we’re equals."

Suddenly, Joel’s mood shifted, his voice laced with a darker edge. “You know, you’re just like Faith. Think you’re ready for all this sex stuff, then go crying when you can’t take it.”

His words hit you like a punch to the gut, tears welling up in your eyes. “Joel, that’s not fair.”

He leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest. “Isn’t it? You want to explore, but then you can’t handle it when things get real. Maybe you should think about that before trying to bring in all these new rules.”

You took a deep breath, trying to steady your voice. “It’s not about handling it, Joel. It’s about feeling safe and respected. I thought you understood that.”

Joel’s eyes softened, and he leaned forward, reaching out to touch your cheek. “Sweetheart, you know I care about you more than anything. I’m just trying to make things perfect for us. You don’t have to worry about anything, just trust me.”

His touch sent a shiver down your spine, and you found yourself leaning into his hand despite the turmoil in your mind. “I do trust you, Joel, but I need to feel like my voice matters too.”

He smiled, a seductive, almost hypnotic smile. “Of course your voice matters. It’s just that sometimes, I know what’s best for us. You don’t need to be burdened with all the details. You should be focusing on your art, your classes, the things that make you happy.”

“But merging our accounts without asking?” you pressed, trying to hold onto your resolve. “That’s a big decision, Joel.”

He sighed, his thumb brushing your cheek softly. “I did it because I love you and I want to take care of you. You’ll want for nothing, I promise. Can’t you see that?”

You bit your lip, feeling the conflict inside you. His words were soothing, almost hypnotic, making you question your own doubts. “I just... I need to feel like we’re partners in this, Joel. Like I have a say.”

Joel’s hand moved to the back of your neck, his fingers gently massaging. “You do have a say. I’m listening to you right now, aren’t I? But trust me when I say, some things are better left to me. I want to protect you, to make things easier for you.”

You nodded, feeling a mix of relief and uncertainty. Joel's presence was overwhelming, yet comforting. "Okay," you whispered.

Joel pulled back slightly, his eyes searching yours. “I just want what's best for us. We don’t need outside influences messing with what we have. Like Faith. She’s always been a bad influence.”

You frowned, the mention of Faith bringing back your earlier doubts. “Faith just wants to make sure I’m okay, Joel. She’s my friend.”

He sighed, his fingers still gently massaging your neck. “I get that, but she doesn’t understand us. She’s always filling your head with doubts, making you question everything. We don’t need that kind of negativity.”

You bit your lip, trying to find the right words. “She’s not trying to be negative. She just wants me to feel safe and respected.”

Joel's grip tightened slightly, his tone becoming more insistent. “You are safe and respected with me. You know that. Faith doesn’t see the full picture. She doesn’t understand what we have.”

You looked down, feeling conflicted. “I know she can be overprotective, but she’s just looking out for me.”

He cupped your face, tilting your chin up so you had to meet his gaze. “And so am I. But unlike Faith, I’m here with you every day. I know you better than anyone. You trust me, don’t you?”

You nodded slowly, the intensity of his gaze making it hard to think clearly. “Yes, I trust you, Joel.”

He smiled, his fingers brushing your hair back. “Good. That’s all I need to hear. Just trust me, and I promise everything will be alright.”

You took a deep breath, trying to shake off the lingering doubt. “I do trust you. I just... I don’t want to lose my friends, Joel.”

He leaned in, his lips brushing against your temple. “You won’t lose your friends, sweetheart. But you need to make sure they’re not causing more harm than good. Sometimes, people don’t understand what’s best for us.”

You felt a tear slip down your cheek, and Joel gently wiped it away. “Don’t cry, baby. I’m here for you. Always.”

You nodded again, feeling the weight of his words. “Okay, Joel.”

Joel led you into the living room, his arm securely wrapped around your waist. He settled onto the couch, pulling you down onto his lap with ease. The warmth of his body enveloped you, and you nestled into him, seeking comfort in his closeness. The unease still lingered, but you tried to focus on the moment.

“That’s better,” he murmured, his breath warm against your ear. “Just relax. I’ve got you.”

You nodded, resting your head against his shoulder, letting out a small sigh. His hands began to move, gently caressing your back in slow, soothing strokes. The tension in your muscles started to ease as he continued to whisper reassurances.

“Everything’s going to be okay,” he said softly, his lips brushing your temple. “You don’t need to worry about anything when you’re with me.”

His touch was comforting, and you felt yourself beginning to relax, your worries momentarily forgotten. Joel’s hands wandered lower, tracing delicate patterns along your spine, then slipping under the hem of your shirt. His fingers were warm against your skin, and you shivered slightly at the sensation.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, his voice laced with a seductive edge. “I want to make you feel good. Let me take care of you.”

You felt a surge of heat at his words, your heart beating faster. His hands roamed further, exploring the curve of your waist, then sliding up to cup your breast through your shirt. You gasped softly, the sensation both arousing and comforting.

“Joel...” you began, but he silenced you with a gentle kiss, his lips soft yet insistent against yours.

“Shh,” he murmured against your lips. “Just let go. Let me take care of everything.”

You melted into the kiss, your body responding to his touch despite the lingering doubts in your mind. His hands continued their journey, slipping beneath your shirt and bra, caressing your bare skin. The intimacy of his touch made your pulse race, and you couldn’t help but arch into him, seeking more of the warmth and security he offered.

“You see?” Joel whispered, his lips trailing down your neck. “You don’t need anyone else. I can give you everything you need.”

His words sent a shiver down your spine, both arousing and unsettling. You wanted to believe him, to trust that he had your best interests at heart. His hands moved lower, slipping beneath the waistband of your pants, and you gasped at the intimate touch.

“Joel,” you breathed, your voice trembling. “This feels...”

“Good,” he finished for you, his fingers teasing you with expert precision. “It’s supposed to feel good. Just let yourself enjoy it.”

Joel's touch grew bolder, his fingers moving with deliberate intent. He was taking his time, savoring each moment, and the intensity of his actions left you breathless. His lips found your ear again, his voice a seductive whisper.

"Take off your clothes," he murmured, his hands still exploring your body. "I want to see you."

You hesitated, the command clashing with the turmoil inside you. "Joel, wait," you said softly, trying to steady your voice. "I... I want to try something."

He paused, curiosity flickering in his eyes. "What do you want to try?"

You took a deep breath, gathering your courage. "Your belt," you said, reaching for it. "I want to use it."

Joel’s eyes darkened with anticipation, and a smug smile played on his lips. "You want me to tie you up, huh?" he assumed, clearly enjoying the idea.

You shook your head, your heart pounding. "No, Joel. I want to tie you up."

As you reached for his belt, Joel's eyes narrowed with suspicion. "What are you doing?" he asked, his voice tinged with wariness.

You met his gaze, your hands trembling slightly. "I want to tie you up, Joel. Please, trust me."

His eyes flickered with hesitation, and he pulled back a little. "I don't know about this," he muttered, a frown creasing his forehead. "This wasn't part of the plan."

You took a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside you. "Joel, this is about trust. You always tell me to trust you. Now, I'm asking you to trust me. Just this once."

Joel's jaw tightened, but he didn't pull away. His eyes searched yours for a long moment before he finally nodded. "Alright," he said, his voice low. "But just this once."

You let out a sigh of relief, your fingers resuming their task of unbuckling his belt. The leather felt cool and solid in your hands as you pulled it free, your heart pounding with a mix of fear and exhilaration. Joel's hands were still now, resting on his thighs as he watched you intently.

With the belt in hand, you looped it around his wrists, pulling it tight enough to hold him but not so tight as to cause discomfort. He tested the restraint, his muscles tensing, but didn't try to break free.

"Comfortable?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Joel smirked, though his eyes held a hint of challenge. "I suppose," he replied, his tone lighter but still tinged with uncertainty.

You positioned yourself on his lap, straddling him, feeling the heat of his body against yours. His bound hands rested on your hips, and you could feel the tension in his grip. Your hands moved to brush his damp hair back from his forehead, your fingers lingering on his skin.

"I want you to trust me, Joel," you said softly, your heart racing. "Just like I trust you."

His eyes softened slightly, and he nodded, his voice a low murmur. "I do trust you. Now, what are you going to do next?"

You leaned in, your lips brushing his ear. "I want to explore," you whispered, echoing his earlier words. "And I want you to see what it feels like to let go."

Joel's breath hitched, and you could sense the shift in his demeanor. He was intrigued, curious, and perhaps a little vulnerable. It was a side of him you hadn't seen before, and it gave you a glimmer of hope that you could find a balance between your desires and his control.

As you began to explore, your hands tracing over his body, you felt a mixture of anticipation and nervousness. This was uncharted territory, but the thrill of it was undeniable. Joel's eyes never left yours, and you could see the challenge in his gaze.

"Show me," he murmured, his voice a low growl. "Show me what you've got."

Your face turned red as you stood up, looking at Joel tied up with his own belt. It was a sight to behold—his damp hair, the way the tent in his pants made them look incredibly tight. You smirked, taking off your top and moving closer to shove your breasts in his face. He tried to bite at your nipples through your bra, making you giggle, but you didn't take it off just yet. 

Instead, you moved to your pants, quickly stripping them off before giving him a seductive look. You dangled your panties in front of his face, giggling again at the hunger in his eyes. He started to claw at the fabric with his teeth. "No, no," you teased, coming to sit on his jean-clad thigh, your knee brushing against his raging hard-on. "Use your words, Mister Miller."

You teasingly put his hands around your neck, his eyes darkening as you started to ride his thigh slowly, giving in exactly where your clit wanted him most. To tease him further, you put the panties in your mouth, letting them dangle as you rode him methodically. "Untie me," Joel growled, grabbing your hair and pulling it back, making you moan and drop the panties.

You rode him a little faster, clinging to his shirt with your hands. "No," you moaned again, your orgasm getting closer. You could hear Joel rustling with the belt behind your head as you rode his thigh faster and faster. Just as you were edging toward your orgasm, you heard the sound of something heavy fall to the floor. 

You looked down and saw his belt on the floor. Joel smirked at you before throwing you into the couch cushions, your ass in the air and on full display for him. He unhooked your bra, caressing your skin and grabbing everything he could. He pushed his hard-on into your ass, making you grind into it once again. "I said untie me," Joel growled as he pulled down his pants and boxers. 

"Teasing me—who are you, baby?" he pulled you up to his chest as he slid his cock into you. The stretch, painful at first, quickly faded into pure pleasure. "You're just so cock drunk," he chuckled as he thrusted up into you. Your moans were the only response you could get out. 

"Teasing me with your panties, thinking I wouldn't bend you over and fuck you into oblivion," he pushed your head down into the cushions and started pounding into you, using his hands to stabilize your hips. The sounds were so erotic—your moans muffled, his skin slapping against yours, and the squelching sound of your pussy being stretched out. 

You moved your hand to rub your clit, your orgasm so close, and Joel could tell. "That's it, there's that pussy, making you feel so good, aren't I?" he continued to pound into you as you rubbed your clit. With a loud cry, your orgasm washed over you, making your hips instinctively move forward. Joel tightened his hold on your hips, his fingers sure to leave bruises. "Not so fast, pretty girl," his voice starting to break as he thrust slowly, fucking you through your orgasm and letting himself hit his.

He let out a high-pitched groan as he came inside you, his long, thick ropes of cum filling your insides. He pulled out and idly fell back onto the couch. You lay there for a moment, basking in the feeling of his warm cum all over your cunt. 

"Go get cleaned up, my cum's dripping on the couch," Joel chuckled as he playfully pushed your legs off the couch. You stood up and walked to the bathroom, still trembling from the intensity of what just happened.

[genericpuff]

I'm curious - how many unanswered asks do you have in your inbox? Or do you just delete the ones you don't plan on answering?

do you feel good anon

do you feel good about yourself with this question

targeting me like that

geeeeez

ok but more seriously LMAO i have an embarrassingly large amount of unanswered asks but i do read all of them <3 a lot of them honestly are just from folks like, sharing their anonymous opinions about either LO and LR, with the odd one about comic advice, sharing webtoon recommendations, and other things of that nature!

In the case of the LO asks, it's stuff that often has already been spoken about at length before so I don't really have anything to add (but trust me, I'm usually in total agreement, if I heavily disagree with a take I'll usually try to respond to it but it's rare that that's the case because most of the takes are just things like "wow the art in this panel sucks" like yep it sure do LOL) and often it just feels like my inbox is just like, a comment box for people to get their feelings out anonymously and honestly that's fine, I just also can't really respond to every single one unfortunately, but I do read them and I love y'all's takes!

With LR asks, y'all are way too sweet to me and send me just the kindest things about LR, and I hope y'all know that even if I wind up not getting back to your ask about it, I do read everything you send and appreciate so much the amount of support you've all shown for this project since I took it on <3 A lot of those asks are literally my version of "do it for her" where I read them and it reminds me of why it's so worth doing what I do :') <3

Whenever people recommend me other works to read, I add them to a list and I am currently trying to tackle it :) (honestly that list isn't as big as you'd think, a lot of the recommendations are for the same stuff, like other Greek myth retelling comics or otherwise just bad webtoons that people want me to suffer thru LOL) I just recently finally got a physical copy of Song of Achilles and while it's slow going, I'm gonna be sharing my extended thoughts about it, either in a big Tumblr post or maybe a video if I can motivate myself to do it 🤔

And of course, the comic advice asks... these ones admittedly I do tend to actually move into my drafts because I really, REALLY do want to respond to them, but I'm also not someone to half-ass responses to questions like that. That is a bit of a bad habit on my end because it often means I'm spending crazy amounts of time going over topics that can be researched, but I also just really love talking about comics so it doesn't feel good to get a comic advice ask and just leave it at "idk just start" like yeah, do that, but also I want to pass on all the things I WISH I had known when I was first starting out and I'm glad people see me as someone to learn those things from! So when it comes to those asks, don't worry, I'm picking away at them <3 (but also man, I should probably just like... put together some kind of hitchhiker's guide to comic making or something huh LOL)

Anyways! I do have a lot of unanswered asks and honestly, I'm not really one to delete them, even if I don't get back to some of them it is still nice to read them in their own little curated space separate from my main blog, it's kind of like a personal comment section between myself and those of you who took the time to write <3 The only asks I tend to outright delete are ones that are just like, way too bad faith to even want to give any attention to, or bot spam lmao But for the majority of y'all who have sent genuine asks to my inbox and never saw a response and worry that I might have ignored it or deleted it, I hope you can have reassurance in knowing that they are all still there and even if I can't make time every day to respond to them, receiving all your personal takes about LO and your amazing feedback and kind words about LR is something I'm always excited to see whenever that little notification pops up in my Inbox tab. I see you and appreciate you <3

[1moreff-creator]

Regarding your revised Eden!Culrpit Theory Post:

If you're okay answering this, why do you believe that people who believe Hu is the culrpit have to be reading her actions in bad faith? You said that Eden taking the tape means there's more physical evidence for her being the culrpit so arguments about her putting on a facade come from less of a place of bad faith.

However, Hu's wire is involved with the crime & there's no explanation for how it got there. 'Nico took it' but we don't necessarily know that or how, so there's arguably no less reason to assume Hu could be involved as well.

This isn't meant to be inflammatory either, I genuinely just want to understand what you meant by that; I'm impartial one way or another but I don't understand why you would need to be reading Hu's actions in bad faith while you wouldn't also be doing the same for Eden.

ty for answering if you do, and if not ty for reading anyway. ♥️

Hey! Yeah, honestly, I feel I expressed myself pretty poorly in that section of the post you’re referencing, in fact I’ve decided to edit it because I believe it came off as more aggressive and meaner than I intended it to. So it’s fair of you to ask for clarification.

CW: Eden!Culprit, discussion of murder attempt

Technically speaking, both theories revolving around Hu trying to kill someone and Eden!Culprit require some level of “bad faith reading”, in the sense that suspecting anyone of murder is going to make you look at most of what they say in a negative light. So I was wrong to use that term with Hu. I think a more accurate way of saying how I feel about it (and keep in mind this is just my opinion) is that “the level of scrutiny Hu and her lines are placed under is not justified by the concrete evidence of the case(s).”

That should make my feelings a bit clearer. I see the tape’s disappearance from the gym as near irrefutable evidence that Eden is the culprit, so I’m willing to bend and twist her lines of dialogue to fit the evidence. Dialogue has an openness of interpretation that the tape, in my opinion, doesn’t, though I get why that’s not how everyone feels about it.

However, I don’t quite see an equivalent for Hu. The wire in the Ace crime scene doesn’t incriminate her any more than the turpentine used incriminates Rose, or the letter written to Arei (by itself) incriminates Eden. I can pretty confidently say that either Ace or Eden took the tape from the gym; I cannot confidently say that Hu took the wire to the gym.

Despite Nico being caught mid-murder attempt (and they admit they did try to kill Ace), Hu is nowhere to be seen; none of her dialogue afterwards implies she was there; none of Nico’s dialogue points to her being there (their secret quote doesn’t count, we don’t know if that’s gonna be said this chapter or not); unless there’s some method theory I’m missing here, I’ve never really seen a method that requires Hu to be there alongside Nico, and Nico never denies being the one to take the turpentine, meaning they must have been involved since the start. You get the idea.

You need to somehow get around all of that if you’re going to believe Hu is involved in the Ace case, plus the fact that a lot of her dialogue seemingly contradicts the notion at first glance. Meanwhile, the only assumption Nico!SoloAceAttacker requires is that Nico, somehow someway, was able to take the wire at some point; and given there’s precedent to believe they can and would do something like that (turpentine), I find it quite easy to believe.

Obviously, it’s a matter of opinion. To some people, the wire is a smoking gun that proves Hu’s involvement, the same way I feel about the tape for Eden. And I guess, in that case, I can’t really blame them for reading Hu’s dialogue in a different manner. For me, though, the wire has perfectly acceptable workarounds. And I feel Hu being involved in either crime scene makes far more assumptions than simply saying Nico did everything themselves, which then by Occam’s Razor makes me inclined to believe the latter.

Thanks for the ask, and sorry if anyone felt hurt or offended by my original wording, it really wasn’t my intention.

[orenji-iro-no-sora]

Thoughts on TGCF Vol 3

Vol 1 | Vol 2| Vol 3| Vol 4| Vol 5| Vol 6| Vol 7| Vol 8

*Spoilers*

Arc 2: Heart as gentle as a flower

I didn't talk much about the second arc in the last post because most of everything happened in the third volume and I wanted to keep it all together.

To me, this arc was the hardest to read up till now. I was wishing for it all to end which was a sentiment that took over Xie Lian as well as his confidence in what it means to do the right thing waned with the progression of Xianle-Yongan conflict. While in the beginning, he believed wholeheartedly that saving someone, doing something was still better than nothing at all, by the end of it, it was clear that much of his suffering had been futile.

It truly was a hopeless conflict, I reflected a lot on what could be done, what really is the right thing to do and in the end there were no answers. In the face of destiny, there's not much anyone can do and as the state preceptor said: when humans ascend, they're still humans. Gods are still humans, they don't know better and they can't save anyone. Only people believed that Xie Lian should be invincible. He wasn't and could never be.

I applaud MXTX for her depiction of the events as something genuinely unstoppable with so many factors that it becomes paralysing to take any decisions. Having kindness and compassion for all means that making 'necessary' sacrifices is unacceptable as there's nothing, no act in this world that's wholly beneficial, it'll harm someone or something. There's no pure goodness.

Xie Lian did his best though, all his decisions were deliberate, rooted in his virtue, kindness and his desire to save people. He walked the walk, it just didn't make any difference. He was too young to have faced it all and by the end of it, the exhaustion and the inadequacy of his powers caught up to him.

Death isn't something that is deserved/undeserved, it's not punishment that the innocents must be protected from. It simply is and that I think is the most important lesson here.

Qi Rong and the Human Face Disease

Qi Rong was a nuisance from the start. He really brings out the worst in Xie Lian (sibling effect). Out of everyone, he believed too much in Xie Lian's indestructibility and it's not shocking that he ended up hating him so, commissioning those disrespectful statues, inciting the populace to blame him for it all, burning his mother's corpse and possessing Guzi's father. Hua Cheng's hate for him makes complete sense. Xie Lian feeding him his deathly congee was hilarious though.

I didn't realise the severity of Human Face Disease when it was first mentioned in Vol 1. But arc 2 really presented it as one of the creepiest fictional diseases I've ever read. It's the most horrific manifestation of unjust death and I'm just glad it's not a real life thing.

Mu Qing, Feng Xin and The Three Tumors

Seeing the relationship the Xianle trio shared with each other, I finally understood the awkwardness in their interactions during the first volume. While Feng Xin is fairly easy to understand (loyal, faithful, straightforward), I think Mu Qing is one of the most interesting characters. He's insecure but decisive, he respects Xie Lian but also envies him. To him, the end justifies the means which is in complete contradiction to Xie Lian who wants justice at all levels. There are so many complicated emotions between them and the way they go about it is entertaining to read. I hope they can clear out the misunderstanding as we progress further in the story.

The interactions between the Heavenly Officials, especially the Three Tumors, were unexpectedly funny. Every official is multi-dimensional and has a unique personality. It really offered the much needed light-heartedness after the misery of the second arc. I also really like the Wind Master. He's friendly, even when he messes up in shielding Xie Lian from others (poor guy has bad timings). I am looking forward to how they'll deal with the Reverend.

Side note- Ming Yi focused only on the feast is so me lol.

Hua Cheng's unwavering devotion, first kiss, Ruoye vs eming

I didn't expect them to have met so many times. They really were connected throughout their lives. Out of everyone, I think he was the only one who reciprocated Xie Lian's kindness and consideration.

In my heart, you are god! You are the only god, the one true god! Do you hear me?!”

He fulfilled his promise of building the most extravagant temple for Xie Lian and celebrating him with plays and three thousand lanterns. (XL is the light of his life after all). They're so cute and they finally kissed!! Underwater too!! It was still weird though. Just as weird as Xie Lian's heat from the Land of the Tenders. I don't know what I think about it all except for it reminded me of the awkwardness of Mo Dao Zu Shi.

Another cute thing was Ruoye showing off in front of Eming as he cut vegetables for Xie Lian's poisonous soup (?). Them competing against each other and puffing out when Xie Lian praised them was the highlight for me.

[maegorsbignaturals]

hey the maegor big hairy tiddy art happened to end up on my dash and after going through the reblogs I think you're the one most suited to fulfill the following genuine and heartfelt request

please explain the maegor fandom to me

Hey, no worries! I Know how strange it might be to see a fandom specifically to this character that is rightfully an AH.

So, the Maegor fandom can be break in three archetypes of people:

The first one is the ones who think of Maegor as a Chad-sigma type of character who is just villanified but he was actually so cool and it was a misunderstood hero on a bad tell story. They see him as a hero for ending the faith's armament and pushing Ceryse aside for being a EvIL HiGhTowEr (SOMETIMES this people mix with the team black fans) and that with their whole chest think Maegor's children were poisoned by Tyanna because he was a stud that bedded two women in the same night and had six wives and that he was some kind of sex-god. They Ignore that even if the disarmament of the faith was something good to westeros, it was more of a "even a broken clock gets the hour right twice a day" type of movement of his part, or an opportunist thing to do given how many problems the faith was giving him. Plus they also ignore that some of the edicts he made against the faith took down some innocent people with them. Rememeber when Maegor paid money to anyone that bringed him the scalp of a Warrior's son but most of it was of innocent people? or his severed heads that were said to be of poor fellows but most of it was of innocent smallfolk? Yeah, me too. Most of this type can be found on reddit, FB or even twitter

2. The second type is the x reader type of ficker. Most of them could be Dark romance readers and attracted to Maegor's looks (not blaming them tough) decide to insert themselves into the texts and make their relationships with Maegor the type of "Cold and dangerous guy who hates everyone but this one particular girl". This type may vary between each other because some get this really romanticized version of Maegor and others don't, so you get a lot of interpretations of this man. Once i readed a x reader post about a Yandere Maegor with a Pregnant special one that after she gave birth he did not gave a fuck about her and only had her as a baby machine an i was like...yeah, i suppose this gets really close to the cannon. Other's doesn't really vibe with being x reader but still like Maegor as a dark romance kind of guy and so they pair him with Rhaena making them a Daemon/Rhaenyra kind of relationship. You can find them here in tumblr, twitter, fb and wattpad and AO3.

3. And the third one is the ones who do not vibe with Maegor's disney-like evilness. They aknowledge he did evil things (Rhaena's character arc will never stop hurting) and they think hey, yeah, Maegor was a deeply fucked up guy but WHY was he an evil fucked up guy? They enjoy nothing more than examining him under a magnifying glass, if they could disect him and do a vivisection at him, they would do it.

Now, here is the thing, you can AND WILL find this specimen mixed because humans are not only one thing but multiple things at once. Take me as the example, i like to think Maegor was not born to usurp Aenys as most may think, but as a SUPPORT to him. but i also have an oc to do selfshipp with Maegor (Kudos to Beqqo the jester to living rent free on my mind). You can find an X reader ficker that knows Maegor was a BAD person but still enjoys him. It may vary in what spaces you are, yet, the thing that unites us is THE LOVE we have for Maegor as a character. And you may think, why do you love a character that made such horrible things? And that is a secret weapon called "Characters are tools not stances of who you are as a person", when reading Fire and Blood i don't think "DAMN George must really hate women" but as a "Well, this bad things that happen to women it is to show that feudalism and monarchy are systems where women are treated as ultimate tools to keep power and have not real power other that the one lent from men to them"

[reotacchii]

hello!! may i request gepard x child!reader?? (platonic ofc) reader is around 13-14 years old

From Me to You

pairings : gepard landau x child!gn!reader

genre : headcanons, platonic, FATHER AND CHILD BONDING !!!

a/n : dear anon, i'm truly grateful for this request. As my motivation were about to drop, this somehow bring me back to joy and happiness to write more 💗. If this isn't met to your likings, always feel free to shot another req on my askbox, can't wait to see more req in the future 💕

"A child was never apart of my plan, " the Captain exclaimed. A child with a look of purity and innocence stares at their so-called father confused, unexpect with such of a response.

"But with you, I would like to learn how to love"

★ - The captain, Gepard, found you near at one of the Silvermane Guard post. A child yet teenager-like figure that seem lost, unknowingly the exact fact of their own location.

★ - His first instinct were to ask you where's your parent and your house located, but you refused. You have your own reason to not telling due to the past on that house so you left by running away from it.

★ - It became a small arguments between the guard of what to do with you, but worriness took over Gepard and so he decided to taking care of you.

★ - You weren't that exact innocent type of a child as your age itself lands on a rebellious phase (supported by the mark of puberty). You completely wary and aware of who's taking care of you, you are more than worried that the one who's taking care of you would be so strict and uptight just like your own parent.

★ - Or moreso, as the Belobog's citizen, you heard once or two about the Landau family so you are afraid you might get opposed or being another outcast.

★ - but those thought soon crumbled into pieces, Gepard fully taking care of you, so caring, yet protective on his own way; the complete opposite side he is from work.

★ - whenever he's back from patrolling or mission, he'll makes sure to bring you some gift; each day differs to see which one you like the most. That way he learnt your likings

★ - Also your food schedule, you refused to open up to him about kind of food, but with his previoud kindness, you can't help but to tell him the food you've always wanted to eat ever since you are a kid.

★ - No further a do, he'll run like a speed to go to the store that sells your favorite food.

★ - Each time you feel sad, he'll always be there to support your back by giving you a plenty of hugs.

★ - He might also keep a track of each hobbies you do during his free time, and he'll makes sure to also involved in it so you both could have a quality time together

★ - Maybe he wasn't a bad person like you thought at first.

★ - As the time progressed, you'll clinging onto his back or his feet if he came back from patrolling. He's also willing to give you a piggyback ride across the Administrative District so he could always hear your giggle and little laughs whenever he jokingly speds up his pace.

★ - Whenever he was patrolling, he began to comfortable enough to entrust you in Serval workshop, he put a lot of faith in his sister to babysits you instead of passing it on other hand. He can't bare to have you missing to someone else so he trusted the babysits on someone he knows the most.

★ - Oh! Did I mention before that Serval is genuinely the best aunt right there, she taught you how to connect a couple of devices, basic mechanic problem fixes, and she even got you into musical instrument! You also got to learn on how to singing from her.

★ - Gepard is completely in shocked when he got to know you doing all these in his sister workshop.

★ - But soon his fazed would turn into a proud feelings in his chest, you have a good future and thats what his goal meant from being a Silvermane Guard Captain; to protect the Belobog generation and future.

★ - You both exchanging a lullaby before you sleep; though Gepard isn't the exact best at singing, you always loved it and that gives Gepard an exact confidence to always doing it with you.

★ - "Hmm.. Hmm.. Hmm.." you hummed along with Gepard lullaby, fighting the urges to sleep but a yawn continued,

★ - "It's the little y/n need to sleep?" he warmly said, putting a blanket and ensure you are wrapped warm, safe and securely.

★ - "*yawn* mhm.. Good night, dad," the word 'dad' wasn't intentional, but your subsconcious made you blurt the word out. You weren't realizing this because you doze off to sleep after, but Gepard — oh boy, at that exact moment he feel like the proudest and happiest man alive.

★ - watching you fell asleep, he'll grabbing your small hands on his hand, somehow it made him feel so comfortable and it makes him sure that you always feel safe with him.

★ - giving you a kiss on your forehead, you'll smile lightly on your sleep.

★ - "good night, sweetheart"

[shiikiyun]

Futa Kajiyama and Remorse

by someone that would hit him in the head if they had the chance

The discussion over whether Futa's shown remorse over his actions is genuine or not is something that has existed for years at this point, and it'll probably always be a debate. Just thought I'd give my personal take on it.

Starting off by saying that it is very ironic that a huge part of the discussion on his character and crime is how genuine he is when he admits fault, considering his case is entirely related to social media, almost like how when public figures online mess up and everyone else picks apart their apologies and rate the sincerity of them (not saying it's a bad thing, influencers will explode before handing a good apology, i just thought it was funny to point out). That aside, let me actually talk about him.

First, what did he do? In short, he began a witch-hunt campaign and doxxed a middle-schooler over a claim with no basis that said kid tried to reason with him over and he ignored, (pressumably) pushing her to suicide. Fucked up. Very understandable unforgiven veredict in the first trial, since his denial of his actions was so strong, he had it coming for sure.

Now, his feelings around his crime. It's said a lot that he doesn't feel sorry for his victim, that he only feels anxious and "guilty" because he's facing consequences and he's scared of dying, so he'll do anything to avoid that (so; admit fault, even if he doesn't believe he was wrong). And he is stubborn, so it's not crazy to see it that way, but—

Does he really not care?

From the way I see it, Futa is telling the truth when he says he never intended her to die. Personally, I would "should've thought about it twice then?" 'd him if I could, but I can't in good faith call him disingenuous for saying he didn't want it to end that way.

People don't take their actions on social media seriously. This happens all the time. People will say they most cruel things to strangers over minimal disagreements, and they don't consider it to be that damaging because "it's just social media". Futa is no different than that.

He got a power trip from the praise he received after he called out a teacher for sexual harrassment (which is obviously an actually fair reason to dunk on someone), took it too far over something mundane, and it actually had real life consequences on an innocent person. And he knows this. He's always known. The very moment he realizes what he did is when he's horrified of himself and is visibly shocked— He didn't want this. But he did it, and now there's blood on his hands.

To call that reaction disingenuous, or relate those feelings solely to the fact that he's facing consequences now, is completely ignoring that it happens before he's aware about receiving backlash from his friends.

That's where his anxiety comes from. He's always known he fucked up awfully. When ES insists on him being a murderer, what makes him stutter and show fear is that same word. He's a murderer, and he can't cope with that, but he knows what he did no matter how much he denies it. From the very beginning all Futa has been is a coward; unable to accept that his actions killed someone until he gets some sense literally beat up on him.

Now, this is where I drift onto something even more people might disagree with, but personally I think it's intentional. The representation of his victim, in both MVs.

Because Futa saw no difference between her and other people him and his friendgroup judged, firstly, she's shown as a videogame monster. Her silhouette changes to a more human-like one when he realizes she died, but that's about it. It shows more of his attempt at dettaching from what he did, refusing to see things for what they are.

But then Backdraft came and totally changed that.

I have to bring up the other 2 monsters to make my point clearer. Like I said, in Jihen Joutou, Futa pictures all of his targets as monsters. In Backdraft, the first 2 remain the same style, but Killcheroy changes.

isn't she adorable, by the way?

Unlike the other two, she's a completely different art style. Cartoony, cute, childish. Because Futa finally got to a point where he can't separate his actions from himself anymore, and had to recognize to have played part in her death, we see his victim for what she is—

A middle schooler.

Of course, her straight up appearing would've been enough to convey that, but the addition of making her character different (innocent, friendly, harmless) further shows how Futa does recognize that he hurt a child that ultimately wasn't doing anything wrong.

And, lastly, and this is entirely personal and where even More people might not agree: I just don't he's lying. I don't think he's trying to manipulate anyone into thinking he feels remorse just to get relief. I believe him when he says he knows what he did was wrong and he regrets doing it, that he wouldn't do it again. And I also understand (and agree) when he says ES, and us by extent, are doing the same.

People in the fandom like to act like he's crazy in the head (hyperbole) for saying that, that he is entirely saying it to guilt ES into forgiving him, and it honestly exhausts me. So like, hey, I'm not Futa, I'm part of the audience and I've voted. So let me say it: We are in fact the same.

He is not wrong in believing it. The MILGRAM system only abuses people under the excuse of giving justice and punishment to those that deserve it regardless of the degree of their crime— And I'm not talking about Kotoko. The psychological torture all 10 of these people are going through is not fair, not on the most forgivable one, nor the least. It is just an abusive system. This system killed people, some of which were teenagers, for having a troubled life. How is that any different from him?

Now I just said we are the same for the dramatism— Of course we are not the same on the basis that we are not actually hurting real people, but like, this fictional character doesn't have a conscience. By MILGRAM canon we really are just a bunch of people getting entertainment from 10 troubled people getting tortured. And as for ES, them continuing to partake on their role when they saw the extreme consequences it has just because they were told to do it is... Yeah, can you really blame any of the prisoners for thinking the guard is also in the wrong?

Ultimately, to conclude: I don't think Futa feels no remorse, nor do I think he only feels bad because he got consequences for it, and I don't understand this point of view. He's shown distress over his actions before backlash came his way, and right now he's at a point where he can't ignore that he fucked up and he will admit to it just fine. He is just simultaneously (and rightfully) upset that a fucked up system that does the same if not worse is the one that gets to decide whether he should be forgiven or not, because in all honesty, none of the prisoners deserve to be judged by MILGRAM.

Aaanyhow, that is it for me. I wrote this in a delirious state from sickness so I hope it's readable and coherent. Peace

Note: i know its implied es attempted to stop the trials and it didnt work, i dont think theyre evil and entirely on a power trip... please dont misunderstand the bit i talk abt es as me saying theyre evil and entirely on a power trip thank you

[tadpolesonalgae]

Hi hi! Im usually a lurker (first time sending anything in actually) I couldn’t help myself this time though and just really needed to say you are one of my favourite writers! Went from binging cbmthy to binging everything else. Thank you for sharing all the amazing writing🙇🙇 I hope you’re taking care of yourself!!💝🌸

…Moving forward…I’m sorry for my ramblings🫠 there’s just so much to talk and love about your stories

Ngl the first line of chapter 22 already made my heart ache🫠 just cause i felt it so deeply that reader almost routinely wants to talk to Bas. The thought of someone being such a big part of your life and just being gone one day over a terrible situation (whether it’s a good or bad thing that they’re gone), atp it’s so built into your routine that you can’t help but check on them or think of them even when you shouldn’t.

Idek how to feel about her sisters constantly wanting to buy things for her room. Cause I understand her sisters wanting to make her room feel more cozy again, and wanting to make her happy with the time she has left AND most importantly, conveying that it isn’t a “waste” to buy her things. BUT I ALSO UNDERSTAND READER’S MENTALITY AND I WILL ADMIT IVE GOTTEN FRUSTRATED IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS. Genuinely it does not feel good when you feel like you’re wasting other people’s money or time

Now Az…man Az…I’m probably in the minority of rooting for him even when the worst interactions happened between them (I say it’s cause I have massive faith in your writing ability to make their relationship come together☝️✨) BUT WJDJJWD I was almost thinking “just what is it that he wants??” Cause first, he’s the one who keeps seeking reader out now(? 2-3 times isn’t that many but I digress) while also flashing from decently warm (decently is important here) to extremely cold or indifferent.

“You kissed me back” EXCUSE ME? WHAT? LIKE- OKAY??? AND?? YOU DIDNT HAVE TO INITIATE IT ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU KNOW SHES SO DOWN BAD(???)

Okok and now the part I’m slightly confused about right? Now it’s very clear that reader isn’t the most emotionally stable and she is very very deadset on the belief that they hate her. So it wouldn’t surprise me if she took Az’s reaction wrong. What may look like ‘a horrible secret being revealed’, could actually be Az just- almost not knowing what to say to make things better? Or just…not knowing how to handle this? The line I’m questioning is “Azriel doesn’t care if she hit the nail on the head” how I took it is that what she said wasn’t necessarily correct but it doesn’t matter cause Az doesn’t want her to think he reciprocates but he also doesn’t want to reveal a “part of himself”👁️👁️ CURIOUS, VERY CURIOUS. And so he opted to be cold so she would hate him which I almost think that’s cause of his own deep rooted fears and hatred for himself (especially cause of the ‘if she thinks she’s in love with him, she should know how awful he is’ line). And that’s the part he doesn’t wanna expose to her (MAYBE??) as well as he actually probably pays way more attention to her than she thinks (Mr. I-know-you-have-a-small-scar-from-the-arrow)

Anyway that’s my rambling, please let me know if I misunderstood some of the text with Az!! THANK YOU FOR THE BEAUTIFUL, HEART WRENCHING CHAPTER, EXCITED ABOUT THIS PRISON BREAK SITUATION💝💝

‘Hi hi! Im usually a lurker (first time sending anything in actually)’

Ahhh hello!! Very happy to have you here (whether you’re lurking or chatting in 🧡💛)!

‘just really needed to say you are one of my favourite writers! Went from binging cbmthy to binging everything else.’

Really?? ☹️🫂🫂 I’m so happy you liked cbmthy enough to explore further! I hope none of it was too jarring to read—I imagine hopping from angsty cbmthy to smut riddled basically-everything-else might be a bit surprising at first 😭

Please do not worry about rambling, I love love love hearing from people and chatting!! 🧡💛 (I also find it very helpful too—anyone who’s been here since the beginning of cbmthy will be able to confirm I relied—and still do kind of—a lot on feedback to help me measure angst levels and steer the story progression 🫣)

‘Ngl the first line of chapter 22 already made my heart ache🫠 just cause i felt it so deeply that reader almost routinely wants to talk to Bas.’

Yes! And it’s not like anyone other than Mor might have any reason to go to the Winter Court so it’s like he’ll be completely out of reach once he’s gone!

Though while I think it will be painful for reader to lose him like that—in the way that he won’t be completely gone, but just far enough she can’t reach him—it might push her to venture further in attempts to find a way to get another third space for herself (or I guess technically second space, since she’s only really in the River House now with her sisters and the IC)? I think that might be exciting to see?

What you said about doing things out of habit though, expecting someone to be there once they’re not…do you think anyone might spot a single empty chair and pause? Or pass a pair of gloves and remember sensitivity in their fingertips? After six months has passed, I mean

‘Idek how to feel about her sisters constantly wanting to buy things for her room.’

Yes, even though Rhys is probably horrifically wealthy, and even if that wealth is extended to Feyre and her sisters, I don’t imagine reader would ever really feel like it was hers. Or that she’d earned it.

If reader could accept that offering I think things could be very happy though. Imagine having an entire space designed specifically you? With the colours you like, evidence of hobbies scattered around? A safe place to be?

Also being on the other end of reader’s illness, I think it would be natural to want to make someone’s life as happy and as comfortable as possible if you knew it was coming to the end. It’s just unfortunate there’s still that small barrier between them :/

‘Now Az…man Az…I’m probably in the minority of rooting for him even when the worst interactions happened between them’

Yes! Yes! Finally! I’ll shower you in metaphorical flowers!! Thank you!! I promise it’ll get better, just stick with me and everything will be fine!!

‘Cause first, he’s the one who keeps seeking reader out now’

I think it’s very funny that they keep meeting, and trying to have a normal conversation and just,,,failing,,,consistently 🤭

‘“You kissed me back” EXCUSE ME? WHAT? LIKE- OKAY??? AND?? YOU DIDNT HAVE TO INITIATE IT ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU KNOW SHES SO DOWN BAD(???)’

I adore that I could practically hear the indignant splutter through the screen 😭🧡💛

To be fair, in that moment Azriel thought that reader was accusing him of sexually taking advantage of her which is why he opposed her in a way that was kind of embarrassing for her, when reader was actually talking about Azriel using her to get a read on Elain (which yay, reader’s keeping that in mind now!!)

‘So it wouldn’t surprise me if she took Az’s reaction wrong.’

👀? To be fair, if she’s convinced herself that everyone hates her, I imagine convincing herself that Azriel might try to kill her out of revulsion wouldn’t be a tricky task 😭

‘The line I’m questioning is “Azriel doesn’t care if she hit the nail on the head” how I took it is that what she said wasn’t necessarily correct but it doesn’t matter cause Az doesn’t want her to think he reciprocates but he also doesn’t want to reveal a “part of himself”👁️👁️ CURIOUS, VERY CURIOUS.’

So I’m actually very curious to see how people interpreted this part because I think it’s the closest we’ve gotten so far to understanding an element of Azriel’s cold behaviour towards Reader?

I’m not going to elaborate on this part because it will be expanded upon later in the series and I don’t want to spoil anything, but yeah. It was fun to write those two paragraphs from Az’s perspective 🥲

‘as well as he actually probably pays way more attention to her than she thinks (Mr. I-know-you-have-a-small-scar-from-the-arrow)’

I want to say I ADORED that scene and I think reader was probably frozen from awe too. I mean, we know how flustered she gets from holding a conversation with him alone, not to mention when close proximity is added since Reader was obviously raised human, and time alone with a man + TOUCHING??? = Marriage. Horse and carriage. COURTING. (I’m being hyperbolic 😶)

Since I think that’s how reader’s been raised to view those things, I imagine she attributes much more meaning to them than any of the born-fae do, hence all the flushing and embarrassment and elevated heart rates 🤭

(That’s not to say that Azriel was flirting with her. More that they have different perspectives on how to display intimacy—also will be elaborated on—and while reader knows Azriel doesn’t mean those things in the way she understands them, that doesn’t remove their significance for her which makes her feelings much more difficult to temper :) )

Like him touching the spot atop her heart?? Much more intimate than a one night stand where it would only be physical nakedness 😭

‘Anyway that’s my rambling, please let me know if I misunderstood some of the text with Az!! THANK YOU FOR THE BEAUTIFUL, HEART WRENCHING CHAPTER, EXCITED ABOUT THIS PRISON BREAK SITUATION💝💝’

I loved reading you ramble and I’m so flattered you had so much to say about it!! Obviously I enjoy cbmthy since it takes up quite a lot of my time, so getting to hear people like yourself who’ve decided to read all the parts and then further decided to take some time to type messages out into my inbox? 🧡💛🫂🫂🫂

I love it, so much, so thank you for reading and enjoying!! I hope it continues to be a fun adventure! ☹️🫂

[shmowder]

I know ya do tierlists from time to time so I want to ask if you’d do a tier list for the main casts thoughts on piercings/body modifications in general, not sure if body modifications were that accessible during the time period the games seem to take place.

Clara strikes me as someone who’d do their own piercings in the school bathroom (I am not talking from experience I swear) and Daniil seems like if someone mentioned wanting to do their own piercing he’d give them a dirty look and ask if they are looking for an infection? I also think maybe one or both of the Stamatin brothers possibly would have a piercing or two they seem like the type in my mind…?

Not only did Clara try to DIY a nose piercing, but she offered to give the other kids piercings and stick & poke tattoos in the school bathroom. She got busted by the principal, and Alexander Saburov had to go door to door and apologise to the parents of each kid she experimented on.

I think that in the Kin it's normalised for men to have ear piercings. That piercings in general aren't a feminine nor sexual thing, they respect their bodies and view piercings as an art form in a way.

Which is why I think both Artemy and Isidor have their ears pierced.

Realistically, by that time period, most women did. But Aspity was born from the earth merely 5 years ago, so I don't think she ever got the chance. Neither did Grace, who was severally neglected by her parents who didn't even bother to name her before they passed away, the townfolks gave her that name instead.

Aglaya was taken by the inquisiton from a very young age, I don't think they ever peirced her ears then. They probably treated those kids as tools or weapons rather than humans.

Murky was simply too young before and now she has no one to take her to get her ears peirced. I think with time, Artemy might suggest it to both her and Sticky, giving them the choice. Only Menkhu's are allowed to peirce bodies, Isidor did Artemy's ear piercing and now Artemy does it for the children of the kin.

Oyun, as a forearm, might have had more piercings that symbolised his authority and as a form of art. Maybe a septum piercing to go along with the whole minotaur theme? He took them out when he felt like didn't deserve them or the role of forearm, when he lost faith in his ability to help his people.

Anna used to be a circus preformer, she probably has several ear piercings and such to be able to wear eyecatching accessories and steal people's attention during her shows. She took took them out after the circus got disbanded and arrested, in fear that people might associate her with a performer because of them.

Likewise, that's the same reason Mark Immortell has his ears periced. I know he doesn't ingame, but I'd like to think he'd be the type to wear one pair of earrings as symbolism.

Eva might have gotten carried away and got several piercings when she moved into the town and experienced true freedom for the first time. Courtesy to Andrey being a huge influence while the two of them dated. A belly button piercing, dangling jewellery and several others.

She grew bored of them with time and took them out. She might decide to wear them out of the blue or for special occasions if the mood strikes.

Both Andrey and Peter have several piercings, Andrey, much more so. But the difference is that Andrey's were done professionally while half of Peter's were him getting creative with a needle while high, drunk, or both.

He would offer to give you a piercing if you drink with him, it will 100% get infected the next day.

Bad Grief definitely got some when he was just starting his climb onto the ladder of crime, he was edgy let him be. He still has them, genuinely likes them too even when he outgrow the edgy phase. They do help make him look the role, don't they?

Rubin wanted an ear piercing too, yk like Isidor and Artemy and tried to replicate it one night. A different time he was spending time with Grief when they were younger and still friends, Grief offered to show him something cool and Stakh just went along. That cool thing was being his first piercing because Grief needed a volunteer to experiment on before he sticks anything sharp in his own body.

Clara is self-explanatory. She claims that it's okay if she messes up giving someone a nose piercing, she can just magically heal the person.

She cannot.

Anyway, she succeeded in convincing Notkin to let her do it on him, and it surprisingly went well, better than his half failed piercing attempts to give himself.

Her next victim will be Grace.

I almost wanted to put Victor in the "took them out:" or ear piercing category because that man 100% had some wild unhinged young adult life at the Capital. All the coke under the sun you could imagine at his disposal, he slutted it out during those years more than Andrey could ever dream of, he explored and experimented so much, tried every drug invented at least once, really put his liver and white blood cells to work. Actually those wild parties were probably how he met Nina.

Then he was like "huh." and decided it was enough. just completely turned over a new leaf, now he's the pragmatic thoughtful leader, a pillar of the town, the most sensible and humble of the Kains. A most respectable noble man, a loyal husband and a proud father of two.

And you're right about Daniil, he's the type to immediately get on your case and nag you if even one of your piercings looks slightly swollen or done amateurly. As if he didn't almost agree to a DIY piercing back in med school shared dorms.

Daniil is the type of prude to see your tattoos and scoff before saying "you know those are permanent, right?" He'd condescendingly explain the risks and dangers of bodily modifications to you if you ever mention wanting something as simple as a nose ring around him. You didn't even say it to him, you were talking to someone else but he had the audacity to butt in the conversation and lecture you about it.

-

I had a conversation about pathologic characters piercings with a friend before and we came to the conclusion that 90% of the town would go to Artemy for their piercings, especially Andrey who bothers him every week for a new piercing before the last one could properly heal.

Andrey would even shamelessly ask him to do the more risqué piercings like he's talking about the weather. Que sleep deprived Artemy holding a needle and a scalpel in front of a pantless Andrey, attempting not to butcher the other man's ability to have kids in the future.

[eviltiddyproductions]

Destined With You : Episode 15

We’re at the homestretch everybody and I don’t think I’m ready to let go 😭

also everytime I tune into a new episode in a new week it takes me 2 seconds to settle into the universe like for a second I was completely oblivious to the cheek holding and then remembered 🫡

as we get closer to the end I MUST give a shout-out to our girl Hong Jo’s wardrobe especially the sweaters like they’re so cozy !!!! NEED THEM

he is SO SWEET to her 💕💕💕

I know it’s the plot but he’s so kind and adorable with her which makes me genuinely laugh at his and Nayeon’s relationship 😭🙏

hug it out !!! your past lives were terrible 💜

‘sorry to interrupt’ nawwwww even I forgot the bodyguards 😭

hold hands !!!

oh they did

I’m so happy to see them

Hong Jo gets me even I was wondering if he’s okay to drive. Honestly since episode 1 I’m anti Sinyu drive hive like it just gives me anxiety

now sister you better stay in that car 🤨🤨🤨

kdrama security team actually doing their job and doing a quick sweep of the place ?!!! someone pinch me 🤩🤩🤩

they’re holding hands !!!

keep going besties

NO WAY

HONG JOOO !?!!!

get back here 😭

i lost so bad

😭😭😭😭😭😭

lmao this blanket situation. #real

just lost everything I wrote here omg tumblr drafts you will crumble !!!!

to summarise her dad ate with the monologue of her not being there in the hospital and just leaving lol (like she literally jumped town)

but then he ruined it by being a weirdo and being mean to his wife !!! she’s adorable and I literally don’t know why his dumbass is THAT mean to her if he chose to marry her

aunty get with the cute younger best friend !

also Hong Jo’s landlord aunty is the sweetest little sunishine !!!!

the cut fruit plate, someday Mr. Kwon will make someone very happy

not this office couple blind date thing…. my precious minutes 😭

fighting over someone you didn’t even go out on a BLIND date with oh she has too much time !

Hong Jo missing out on the most fun day in office

the plot refusing to let me see my mains kiss it’s bad for me

let them kiss !!!

lmao who is this random boss, we saw him twice in the office scenes today and I don’t remember seeing him earlier

the spectacle bun lady is so sweet

Hong Jo finally getting a gossip circle I used to pray for times like these 😭

Hong Jo come get some lessons from the assistant man 💕

???? Sinyu’s just unserious

oh the cute bestie who took Sinyu’s mom for the shooting stars thing is the one serving the papers💅

one thing about Sinyu’s dad he’s going to be annoying 😍 he’s been demeaning her since episode 1 lmao

aunty you’re not selfish at all, stay away from that loser of a man at all costs 😭🙏

I literally don’t know what exactly this man is still here for but the actor is gorgeous !

someone needed to thread the villain arcs a little better because I’m failing to grasp the importance of whatever this dude is doing (similar to me not grasping whatever the stalker was doing before he suddenly started vodooing)

wait are they actually making Mr. Kwon into a bad guy bad guy ? (let me have a little faith in him anyway 🤨)

their horrified faces at the public proposal! these girls get it 😭😭😭 (I’m terrified of it)

but also…. this isn’t the romance I’m tuning in for, I’m sorry to Mr. Gong stans….

not them pressuring her to say yes MY GOD ???? she literally just got out of a terrible marriage

lmao was this show sponsored by a bank 💀 okay !!! 💸💸💸

I adore Sinyu’s mom down so her and Hong Jo bonding just makes my heart fuzzy 🥰🥰🥰 !!! they deserve the world and I suddenly wish this show was 4 episodes longer so we could sit with moments like these 😭

let my sister divorce in peace, she has nothing to do with this construction business lol

the audacity to mistreat her for so long and then to say he’s fine with losing the company but not her like BE SERIOUS

wine on the table and my sister in a white sweater I’m worried

I feel like we as the audience were already pretty chill with the Sinyu and Hong Jo situation lol 😭

Nayeon is a different level of nasty omg ??? lock her up ???

I need Hong Jo to slap her once I BEG 😭😭😭

HONG JO FIGHT BACK

NO WAY 😭😭😭😭😭😭

at least throw the wine back !?!!

naurrrrrr

no kisses and no slaps this show hates me

I adore clingy Sinyu

they really baited me with last week’s preview but Sinyu wasn’t wrong when he said she looks good in everything !!!

that’s one way to do it 😭😂

in the walk in closet 💅💅💅

oh wow 😳 !

wow I thought the Shaman was going to ruin our life with some twist 😂😂😂

‘it’s a daughter, I had a conception dream’ 💀

from groot to a momentary lawyer Jang Sinyu to my beloved groot 🥰

oh no did the stalker talk to this old man ???

saw the bodyguards visible in the shot and a hesitant old man and knew my inner peace was about to be ruined

old man you were so unserious for this !!!!

it's this loser wet tissue of a man again >.<

oh wow Rowoon's crying acting is SO REAL ??? (need to check out his other projects) because the pain and worry in his voice as he said Hong Joo-ah got me actually 😭😭😭

cant wait to do this once again with y'all. see you tomorrow besties, let me just

[shadowmaat]

Good Omens s2: criticisms

Look, folks, I thoroughly enjoyed S2 and am not implying that the whole thing is bad or that it doesn't deserve a third season, I'm just an old-school nerd who believes it's possible to criticize and find fault with something you love. So, spoilers ahead.

My biggest problem remains the Gabriel/Beelzebub story. It doesn't make sense within the context of what we know of the characters. I just can't wrap my head around sanctimonious, rules-obsessed Gabriel falling so hard and so fast for Beelzebub. And that Beelzebub would feel the same way. It took millennia for Aziraphale and Crowley to reach a point where "love" was even a question, never mind deciding on an answer. I'm sorry, but you can't speed run a slow burn.

Sure, you can wave your hand and talk about how "sometimes it just happens like that" but that doesn't feel like it should apply to these two.

If we'd seen more evidence of it being something that has gone on for millennia as the two of them are forced into communication over and over again due to "bureaucratic reasons" it might work a little better. As it is, though, it just feels false. About the only way I can think of to resolve it is to have the two of them pop in again during a pivotal catastrophic moment in S3 and reveal that, surprise! They were never in love (ew) and it was all part of Someone's plan to get them out of the picture so they could work on creating something to stop Armageddon 2 without anyone being the wiser. But I don't think that's what's going to happen. I think we're meant to believe they really did fall in love.

It felt very cliché, and without any of the clever twists or lampshading I'd have expected. It does, however, do a good job of showing what could be possible if angels and demons set aside their differences to work together (and maybe even grow closer). And yes, as a sped-up reflection of Aziraphale and Crowley's own relationship, the parallels are pretty clear. Except for the bit where we actually saw how A&C worked together and influenced each other into becoming better entities, and with G&B we just have to take it, ha, on faith.

Where G&B's relationship was bizarre, the stuff between Maggie & Nina was... uncomfortable. They are, again, a watered-down reflection of Aziraphale & Crowley (more on that in a sec), but this time with the added interference of A&C trying to interfere to make them happen as a couple.

Nina herself called them out on that manipulative bullshit, and she was very right. You can't force people to be together, even if they would be a good match and like each other.

I'm also going to put a big red X next to Neil's name if he was, in fact, responsible for implementing one of my most-loathed clichés: giving a character an absolute dick of a partner in order to A) keep the preferred pair from getting together and B) showing how much better the potential partner is in comparison to the absolute dick. It's bad storytelling. More than that, it does a disservice to Maggie. If she is, as we're meant to believe, a genuinely good person and someone who would be a kind and caring match for Nina, then that should be enough. If you have to compare her to someone else to prove how much better she is then you're lacking confidence in the character.

To circle back to our human duo being a reflection of our ineffable ones, I find it a little weird to see Aziraphale & Crowley's relationship become a focus that's reflected in so many unsubtle ways. That isn't, to me, what Good Omens is supposed to be about. Their complicated (and yet simple) relationship is supposed to be background noise, in much the same way as they themselves are meant to be background characters who are simply bumbling around the main plot. I'm not sure I can properly express why it bothers me beyond that. It just does.

I'm also going to say the most wildly unpopular thing I could possibly say about the second season: I didn't like the kiss. I'm SORRY. I know how important and validating it was for 99% of the audience. I know how many people pumped their fists and cheered. And I 100% understand Crowley's utter desperation in doing it and Aziraphale's "I forgive you" auto-response. I'm not in any way trying to piss on anyone's enjoyment of it. I remember what a huge and hate-fueled debacle it was when the last season ended without any formal physical declarations of love. I just... was a tiny bit disappointed.

One of the things I loved most about Aziraphale & Crowley's relationship was that there was no physical intimacy. In a world where we're constantly inundated in every form of media (and advertising, and politics, and so on) that sex/physical romance is the ONLY way to prove you love someone, it was such a profound relief to see one example where that wasn't true. I know I'm in the extreme minority in my preferences, and I wouldn't expect the show to cater to my individual needs at the expense of a broader, more socially-acceptable message, I'm just sorry to have lost that.

Anyway, it was a bit of a thematically weird season, but there was still a lot to love and I hope we get to see how things turn out in season 3.

[a-really-bad-decision]

Look. I get that folks who are approaching the finale from this angle are usually doing so from a place of genuine good faith and love for Joel. But like. If your immediate reaction after finishing season 1 is to insist that the cure never could have been developed/distributed/tested/viable and that the Fireflies were stupid/naive/slapdicks/never could have accomplished it anyways, so Joel Definitely Did Nothing Wrong, I can’t help but feel like you’re wildly missing the point of it all.

Because like. Joel did not ever care if the cure could have worked. He did not care if it’s what Ellie might have wanted in that moment (neither did the fireflies of course, but they’re not the ones who traveled by her side, protected her, made her feel safe and cared about). Neither of these were ever a point of consideration in the finale. Ellie’s death and the resultant hypothetical cure could have had a guaranteed 100% success rate. It could have spread instantly, around the world the moment they removed her brain from her skull, turning every single runner, clicker, and bloater back to a healthy human being, with no deleterious side effect.

And Joel still would have shot that doctor point blank in the face.

Because that moment right there, is the point. To me at least. It’s the climax that the whole story has been building towards: a father’s beautiful, selfish decision to save his daughter at the literal cost of the entire world. And not just the world in an abstract sense, but in ways that carry weight to him on a deeply personal level. Tess’ dying wish. A real future for his niece or nephew. Ellie’s own agency in all of this. And he did it without hesitating for a moment.

Going from treating Ellie like cargo, like a clicker waiting to happen, to deciding that her life is more important to him than than any other human being who was or ever will be born? Regardless of whether it’s “““healthy”””, that’s an incredible fucking relationship arc. And it only has this level of gravity and meaning if there are genuine consequences to making that decision.

(And let me be clear here: none of this is a moral indictment of Joel. Joel’s motivations, actions, decisions etc. are all incredibly blatant, human, and relatable, and if he’d done anything but go on that rampage, it would have contradicted everything we know and understand about him so far. Also, he’s fucking fictional. Who gives a shit if he did a Kinda Amoral Thing. None of it is real, and it doesn’t matter)

The argument here isn’t that Fireflies Good And Smart And Can Totally Save The World For Sure Guys, or Joel Did Objectively Bad Thing And Is Unforgivable Bad Forever Now. The argument is that the show is much more interesting and internally consistent if you buy into the idea that there’s a chance, even a slim one, that the fireflies could have extracted a viable vaccine at the terrible cost of a fourteen year old girl’s life. That maybe Joel did prevent a cure from being made – that he potentially did doom the world for Ellie (or at least doomed it to another few decades of limping painfully by until something else came along). And that despite the cost, he pulled that trigger, brutally and without hesitation. He did it knowing that he’ll have to go on living with the knowledge of what he took from everyone, and how effortless it was to make that choice in spite of it all. That he’ll willingly betray Ellie’s trust as many times as he has to if it means keeping her from taking the burden of that guilt on herself, but also because he can’t bear the thought of her hating him if she learned the truth. And most of all (and in his own words), that if he was given the chance to go back and do it again, he would have made the exact same choice all over.

You take that out, and what kinda finale do you get now? A run and gun scene of a man rescuing a girl that he’s come to love, sure, but now it’s from a bunch of one dimensional, child murdering villains, set in a place they never had to go to, preceded by a journey that was rendered useless before they even left, all because there was never any chance of it working in the first place. Pointless roundabout cynicism, and an endpoint that now textually only existed to stick the protagonists in their get along sweater.

You don’t have to agree with this specific interpretation of the ending. I get that this can come across as a harsh reading of Joel, especially since he’s a character that myself and others genuinely like a lot. But that nitpicky fixation on proving that the cure never could have worked always felt more for the benefit of the uncomfortable player/viewer than as any sort of actual narrative improvement. A way to divest yourself of ever having to sit with the weight of either choice. Of having to think about the way that a secret so massive, sitting unspoken between you and a loved one, can rot that relationship. Of the way that someone you thought you trusted can act in your best interests, but against your own wishes.

And if that’s not what you want from the show, genuinely and without judgment: that’s fine. You keep doing you. I’m just not sure why you’re watching something like tlou otherwise.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

https://www.tumblr.com/im-a-hoping-beetch/726657931160043520/many-people-seem-to-get-genuinely-confused thoughts on this!

"Kataang was rushed" I, a Kataang shiper, agree. In fact this was why it took some time for the ship to grow on me. Maybe this post has potential after all!

"These moments in which Katara is clearly showing interest in Aang are totally not valid because *bullshit reason*" Aaaaand, you lost me.

"Cave Of Two Lovers was a life or death situation!" Yes, but Katara also clearly WANTED to kiss Aang, just like he wanted to kiss her - in fact, we see her get mad when he implied he did NOT want that kiss. Not to mention, even if neither of them had ever demonstrated feelings towards each other before then and had kissed solely to get out of the cave, the end of the episode showes us very clearly that they both clearly ENJOYED the kiss, so it still absolutely counts.

"The Headband had both the Kataang romantic dance and Katara pretending to be Aang's mom!" like I said in a different post, if you take Katara pretending to be his mom in a funny scene as proof of how she felt truly felt about him, you're also gonna have to take her dressing up as Sokka's HEAVILY PREGNANT WIFE as proof that she secretly wants to marry and have kids with her own sibling. Blowing a joke way out of proportion to ignore the very obvious romantic tension between Katara and Aang is ridiculous.

Zutarians LOVE making the weirdest, most obviously bad faith claims ever, then complain that they are called bitter people that will say literally ANYTHING to pretend the canon pairings were way worse than they actually were. Just say "I don't like this ship, and prefer Zutara", it's fine!

[mdhwrites]

I've seen a few argue that Amphibia has an 'unintentionally authoritarian' undertone when it comes to the moral of accepting change, and while I don't really agree with the argument, I have pondered over it.

The 'evidence' they bring up are as follows: According to Matt Braly, the motivation Marcy's dad had for taking a new job was that it was a big 'opportunity' for him. Going off Braly's words, it seems it was done not out of financial necessity, but simply because Mr. Wu wanted to. As a result, some call Mr. Wu selfish and uncaring, ungrateful for the lofty life he already had. They argue he should have learned a lesson at the end, not just his daughter.

Further 'evidence' is the way Andrias is portrayed in an anti-authoritarian light, but the show 'has an expectation of deference to parents and authority' when it comes to any other parental figure than Andrias or his father. The argument goes that it is 'inconsistent' for the show to never question the Wu parents for their actions, while negatively portraying Andrias'.

Again, I really don't agree, partly because the show doesn't consistently portray parents as 'beyond reproach.' I mean, Hop-Pop often mishandles or mistreats his family, even if he means well, and he's portrayed as...well, wrong for it.

But the main reason I don't agree is because the story is one that wants to end with Marcy accepting the move. Having her dad be 'in the wrong because he took a job he didn't need' would result in an ending where Marcy doesn't move due to her dad learning to appreciate what he already has, thereby...nullifying the ending's message that being distant from her friends won't mean Marcy loses their friendship.

That being said, I think a fair point was made regarding the motivation for the move - if that really was Mr. Wu's reasoning, then I can see why some would interpret the story's resolution as 'your parents can't be challenged, even if they're taking you from an environment that gives you joy without any necessity.' Which is why it stays on my mind even if I don't agree - which brings me to my question: is this argument making a decent point by using evidence from the show creator, or is it another one of those takes that people use to justify their feelings rather than make an argument in any good faith?

This argument is so stupid that I hard stopped and my first instinct was to delete it.

That's not a joke. I needed a sanity check so bad that what I was reading was genuinely just insane that instead of waiting until after I'd written this to discuss it with my Discord, I immediately sent them the ask. Like... What? What show did you watch to make this? What is your definition of authoritarianism to think Andrias, Aldritch and THE FUCKING CORE are not people who force their will, loss of self, etc. upon others for the sake of the state and themselves which is at least a pretty decent component of authoritarianism. It's closer to say their argument is pro-authority but... We'll get to it.

So before I actually get into their bad evidence or how much of the show they're ignoring, let's just talk about lack of evidence. My blogs tend to be so long because rather than go "If you don't see this, you need to rewatch the show", I will actually try to be thorough in my examination and even bring up counter examples against my arguments. Most of my negative blogs on Lumity or Amity still admit that Eclipse Lake is a highlight for them. A sign of what could have been that is then drowned out by what actually happened. I am thorough though in part to make sure my argument is sound. I've literally had moments in blogs where looking at the evidence made me hard stop, like when I realized the first time that after Adventure in the Elements, Eda and Luz do NOTHING together for the rest of the season which I didn't know when I started my first blog on the issues with TOH's found family.

Their evidence, their ONLY evidence, is a very specific interpretation of something a creator said about a character who is vocal in one scene, not even on screen, and Andrias/Aldritch supposedly being anti-authoritarian. That's it. They bring up literally ZERO other power structures, authority figures, parents, etc... Because they'd be fucked if they did. They only focus on this very small group because they can spin it in a way that makes their argument sound reasonable. Not including 90% of the rest of the show though means their argument is inherently unsound.

So... What does the other 90% of the show say?

Well first: THE CORE IS AUTHORITARIAN. ANDRIAS IS AUTHORITARIAN. Aldritch... More up and down but that's kind of because he had such a prosperous state as to not need to quell rebellions but even he saw even one concerned cry of dissent as treason. Andrias is a good leader... Because he needs to be. He bides his time but the minute he has absolute power, he rules absolutely. Those who do not obey are literally mind controlled into serving him. Their personhood lost for the state. Hell, Andrias prefers DRONES over people to do his bidding and literally outfitted a robot with a BOMB as a punishment for if it didn't get its job done. The Core literally has a fuck everything but me button with the moon for if people don't listen to it and gives it what it wants and its whole gimmick is literal assimilation and then being crushed under the actual personality and desires of The Core. So yeah, the more substantial part of their evidence is just FLATLY WRONG.

But what about pro-authority? I said that was probably what they were going for more after all, especially since calling Mr. Wu authoritarian... *gestures at how fandoms moralize again because sweet fucking christ* So how does the show treat authority figures and especially blind trust in authority figures? With giving them absolute power and seeing that as a good thing?

You all remember how S1 ended with an upheaval of the status quote of the world because what the toads was doing was being evil and Sasha's want for Anne to listen to her, no questions asked, was unhealthy, right? Or how about how the one time Hop Pop gets full power over everyone instead of having to commonly explain himself or give concessions was the mind control episode where he was blatantly in the wrong? Toadstool... Exists. He actually only is a good guy once he stops only focusing on himself and wanting absolute power and greed and starts thinking about others and being willing to sacrifice for them. Wally's father wants the repression of his son's identity and desires before being proven wrong and a hypocrite.

One of the show's big themes is community and the positive effects of community and you literally CAN'T be pro-authoritarian, or arguably even pro-authority, with that as a core theme. You cannot say supporting and listening to only one person is correct if your main argument is that people are stronger and better working together and supporting each other. Hell, Hop Pop has an episode where he abuses the blind trust of his customers and it only ends badly for everyone. That is literally not something you can include if your main message is pro-authoritarian.

And finally... I could literally just say "Your anger about not seeing Sasha and Marcy's parents will never be justified" again about Mr. Wu. It's just another way to try to call him abusive. To say Marcy was in the right and the trio should have stuck together. Life changes like this do sometimes just happen. My last major move that wasn't just shifting places in the same small town, happened because a sudden decline in someone in the household's health made it less tenable for me to be there. The emotional strain was getting too great for me to handle. I was gone within a month or two.

Mr. Wu wanting a promotion because he cares about his job is not wrong of him. If the guy the position was supposed to go to fell through, he might have only been given weeks to make the choice and move which means pretty much no time to include his daughter. But also... Parents exist for more than their children. He is still caring about Marcy, he isn't literally abandoning her or kidnapping her, so it's okay if he wants to pursue what he cares about too. And that's pretty much the most cynical I can get about it because this isn't getting into him potentially wanting a better job to set aside more money for Marcy's college fund, or how the job they had might have been strained financially and this move could mean going somewhere MUCH cheaper to live as well. Or like... A hundred other reasons Mr. Wu might have seen this as a great opportunity in general.

And here at the end, I stand amongst an eviscerated argument and am tempted to just go "Stop." At least when others bring me arguments, they actually believe in those arguments. They actually think there might be credit to them. It's a very different feeling to have someone actively admitting they think a take is bullshit when it's brought to you, which is part of why I chose to talk about arguments in general with this like I did with your last ask too.

But... I also do get it. I literally needed a sanity check because of how insane this argument was to me. Not everyone has a Discord like mine though where they feel comfortable sharing posts like this and asking for thoughts, let alone have anyone in the Discord who can properly formulate an argument with evidence for why a take is insane. I might be your only option for a sanity check.

So if you want to keep bringing these, feel free to but also, I do have a dedicated Amphibia discussion channel in my Discord. I have one for TOH too. That way if you want to join but don't want to hear about a show, you at least mostly don't if you just mute the channel (they still both come up from time to time while discussing other cartoons but the bulk of the discussion happens in those channels.)

But BOY these Amphibia arguments are fucking wild to me. It honestly probably is a testament for how good the show is at its themes and messaging that people have to stretch THIS HARD to have anything where as when TOH fans go "It's anti-colonial" I at least understand why they have the base premise they do.

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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[spade-riddles]

Submission: I think the MH thing might be a lot simpler than we're giving it credit for.

I don't know how credible this new 🎃 anon is, if at all. (Tip for new anons: we took Spade and Flag seriously because they proved themselves worth listening to before they started asking us to put faith in them. Most of us are at a high alert for trolling right now and not inclined to take a new player on the scene seriously.) But I don't think it matters, because even if they're fake, all 🎃 is doing is presenting us with the same old story we always get of a last minute pivot. We can wait and see if something arises to confirm the story, or we can assume it's bullshit and ignore this "explanation". 

But if you believe 🎃 is bullshit and a coming out isn't on the cards til 2025 (as a lot of us now do believe) then you need to ask yourself why Taylor would beard again, so soon, and with this guy of all people. I think I might know the answer to that. 

Some points to consider: 

1) Taylor might be planning a prolonged "single" phase. She might want to stop her fans wanting to see her in a relationship with a guy. If she goes straight from Joe to singledom, her fans will assume she's still heartbroken over him and hold out hope for a reunion. She doesn't want that. She needs a Tom to erase him like she did Calvin. But I think she's genuinely done with fans creating these happy little hetero fantasies for her and getting attached. This feels almost like a punishment to all the fans who have refused to see her truth over the years. None of this is any faker than Tom or Toe were. The timelines are just as implausible, the PR just as obvious. But this time they don't get their picture perfect fantasy. If they would rather see Taylor with a guy - any guy - than with the loyal and loving woman who has borne her children and been her biggest fan for a decade now . . . then they better open wide and take their medicine. And don't dare complain about how bitter it tastes. 

I don't think this stunt will last long, but by the end of it they'll be begging for Taylor to "just be single" and "figure out what she wants". Which is probably the point. 

2) Karlie has been eating Kushner shit for years now to protect their closet. I'm in the minority that believes this was a sacrifice mostly made to protect Taylor, not a self-serving move on Karlie's part. Looking at it from that perspective, I've been expecting to hear songs about it for a long, long time. Songs about loving someone whose choices destroyed their reputation. Songs about loving someone who is misunderstood. Someone who is seen as a bad guy to the world, but who pieced together your broken heart after a devastating break up from a relationship in which you were nearly engaged. 

Taylor has songs she wants to put out into the world about these experiences, and rightly or wrongly, she still feels she needs the fig leaf of a male muse and a public narrative as cover for them. I don't know if it's bonus Rep tracks or the rumored Lover B side, or something else. But I would guess Taylor has songs about the last few years that mean a lot to her, and we'll probably see them in 3-6 months. This is all just groundwork. 

3) Kind of related to point 2, but looking at it on a more personal level. Karlie tanked her reputation for Taylor, and has been abused by her fans for years, mostly for things she hasn't even done (like her supposed "betrayals"). I don't pretend to know how Taylor thinks, but if that was me, I would have a hard time living with myself knowing I'd allowed the love of my life to be treated like that, so I could make more money and keep myself clear of criticism. Even if she agreed to it. Hypothetically, I might feel that I deserved to get a little taste of my fans' vitriol. 

This might seem like a crazy, illogical decision to us because for once, maybe the motivation isn't to secure positive PR for Taylor. Maybe Taylor is being stubborn, and trying to prove a point to herself and the woman she loves: that she would be willing to do for Karlie what Karlie has done for her. 

Anyway. These are just some thoughts, looking at the whole thing from a different angle and considering possibilities I haven't seen discussed.