#literally my beloved i am going to romance this man

[arseniccattails]

It's funny how if you know the DM's style well enough you know the buttons to press to get what you want. Case in point befriending Greg and trying to see if he has latent sorcerer powers worked.

[matsunoluvr]

୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ how I think the boys from love and deepspace would give a first kiss :3

warnings: suggestive content (obviously?), writing might be out of character, spoilers in general, i get carried away explaining everything because i'm afraid of being accused of mischaracterisation

[story spoiler] first kiss = first kiss where mc is a hunter/the timeline in game

authors notes: i have favourites and it will show CLEARLY in my writing… sorry (not sorry no1 rafayel stan) and i am a yapper

characters: rafayel, xavier, zayne and sylus

link to my master list here!!

more below the cut :3

sorry rafayel... but i feel like he's the most unskilled at kisses because - hear me out - you're his very first kiss. lemurians as a species seem to value bonds and loyalty, and as the literal sea god he wasn't able to nor wanted to just hook up or mess around - he's looking for devotion!!!

(okay, we ignore the kiss in forgotten sea myth story because like come on there was literally no romance mc was drowning)

definitely waits a while before kissing you, rayafel really takes his time to fall into place. after all, he needs to make sure his beloved bride/groom is well and truly his!!!

the type to wait for the ‘right moment’ - but doesn’t force or stage it ykwim? like the time comes naturally - e.g. watching the sunset, or you’re leaning close to him whilst he’s painting

he’s a romantic 100% like there’s a reason his 'floral promise' card was (imo) way fluffier compared to the others - like xavier's was tender-ish but rafayel was fucking melting

he's a sweet talker I just know it.

that charm he uses on his clients? he doesn't want to nor will he manipulate you with it but you know he's going to ramp up the charm to tease you a little

definitely knows his effect on you and uses it to his full advantage (cough cough fiery undercurrents secret times) like whispering in your ear, making excuses to touch you or get close to you

(i think he’d be more 'traditional' because of lemurian customs - the whole bonding + [forgotten sea spoilers] the sea god ceremony where the mc must devote themselves to rafayel displaying a strong level of devotion)

SUCH A GENTLE KISSER OMG like compared to his almost bratty and childish personality he’s a gentleman when it comes to kisses (also because he's kind of unsure what to do...)

the type to tuck strand of your hair behind your ear, fiddle with it a little maybe twirl it around his finger before trailing a finger along your jawline... i can see him like massaging your ear too? idk how to describe it he's a handsy man

first kiss was definitely more sweet than passionate ugawhriulgs he's such a cutie

right after the first kiss i think he’d be pretty affectionate, rather than bratty/tsundere since for him to kiss someone i believe he’d really need to love them (and therefore is more open to being vulnerable)

affectionate as in saying something cheesy probably, commenting on how you tasted or another one of his poetic, artistic quotes (dw raf we love it)

wouldn't be satisfied with just one after that, i can see him going in for a more passionate second and even a third (i mean look at his 'floral promise' memory OR 'fiery undercurrents') in the same few minutes

these follow up kisses would probably be longer and way less chaste, hands moving from tilting your chin up to your waist ahahahahahuwfa

you'd have to show him the appeal of tongue if that's your thing because he's seen it before but never really saw what was nice about it

"But... you're just drinking each other's saliva?" "Rafayel that's hot-"

definitely relived the moment in his head hundreds of times after that night - and you bet your ass he painted a piece inspired from your first kiss with him

any kisses after that i feel like they would follow this default pattern;

if he initiated the kiss i think he’d be more cocky and teasing, especially if he surprised you with one and he sees your flustered face

“Didn’t expect that huh, cutie?”

if you surprised him, however, get ready for typical rafayel childish behaviour, blushing and averting his eyes, covering his mouth with the back of his hand and a pout

“Hey- what was that for!!” Σ（・□・；）

either way rafayel is the worlds silliest man and would cave into literally anything with just a few kisses from you

ALSO KISS HIS COLLAR BONES AND YOU'VE GOT A WHOLE NEW SCENARIO TO UNFOLD

oh i just have a feeling this man is devouring you because puh-LEASEE?? sir we aren't forgetting your 'tender night' card i know that night was anything but tender

xavier is the definition of pent-up desire because this man has been waiting a LONG time and he's not going to be able to hold back very well

(taking heavy inspiration from his '21 days' memory because with his reaction it kind of feels like his first kiss with mc... but tbh i don't know much about xavi)

he's definitely not shy when it comes down to it, yeah he gets flustered if he thinks about it because of course imagining kissing the person he's pined over for centuries is going to fluster the shit out of him but he doesn't shy away form the idea or avoid the topic in conversation

i feel like he'd bring it up casually - like in the 'partner go go' event (aka heartbreaker-chasing-rhythm-game event) he was so insistent on the 'kissing page'

mc was like "apparently you can solve arguments with a kiss" and this mf straight up said "we can argue then" this man is STARVED

i feel like you'd need to initiate the kiss or give him very clear signs you'd be okay with a kiss for it to happen, i don't know why i just feel like he's that type of person

the first kiss is deep despite him trying his best to hold back - you can just feel his desire and longing oozing out of him and he's definitely on fucking cloud nine

xavier's holding your face and stroking his thumb along your cheek and god damn he's good at kissing where the fuck did he learn this from?

the type to break the kiss and then fucking bulldoze into the next one and my god his restraints have broken and he's actually kissing you as if it's the last thing he's able to do on earth

100% a tongue user he's biting at your bottom lip before slipping it in the sly minx

after the kiss he's more flustered than he expected to be - kissing the love of his life (literally) sends him into a flurry of emotions he's never really experienced before

given how possessive xavier is i wouldn't be surprised if halfway through making out he managed to leave a hickey or two in very. visible. places.

he isn't even pretending to feel guilty in the slightest, a smug grin as he shrugs out a half-assed apology.

"Sorry, I guess you'll have to try hide it. Or don't, that would be easier."

if you leave any marks on him he's not leaving you along that night. forget sleeping you two are recreating 'tender night' ALL night.

but seriously, if you leave hickeys over his neck (his canonical sensitive area and where he feels vulnerable) he's going to go crazy because what do you mean you want everyone to know he's yours??? what do you mean you want him as much as he wants you??

tldr; xavier is unusually talented with his mouth and is desperate to prove it to you.

i accidentally wrote way more for xavier than i expected i even cut out some bits holy crap maybe i’m more into xavi than i thought

oh no... zayne you beautiful man i am so sorry... (here comes the one character i have no idea how to characterise + no clue about his lore zayne fans pls bear with me)

okay - zayne looks like a gentleman and i'm sure he very much is even in intimate moments, but i cannot get rid of the idea that his first kiss w you was lowk spicyyyyy

like OH MY GOD I JUST WATCHED SNOWY SERENITY RN I FUCKIGN KNEW IT

that man was pouncing on you in a hospital bed, dishevelled, and kissing you deep my god like the type of kiss that literally as you forgetting where you are

i feel like zayne would be the one to initiate the kiss, again no idea why maybe i'm falling into the dominant zayne agenda

you're probably surprised when he kisses you because he's usually so composed, the 'cold unfeeling' dr zayne - then suddenly he's panting and pushing himself on top of you (consensually of course), pinning you down and going to town.

when he kisses you i don't think he's much of a lip biter, but if you bite his lips or lick at him or anything he's not opposed, as long as your lips are on his and vice versa

after the first kiss he's going straight into another one, his patience has thinned to the point of snapping and now he just needs you.

his hands what does he do with his hands? i'm thinking the typical otome face hold, gentle grasp juxtaposing his fervent kisses LOL

now, why does he kiss you?? how does this all build up? unfortunately all i can think of to match this scenario is something angsty or something along the lines of zayne has fucking had it and all he wants is you

"I need you... please."

this is the type of kiss where he wants to drown in you, breathe you in and just smother his being into yours to forget and erase whatever else is happening/happened

if he's kissing you and pinning you down and you bring up your hand to interlock fingers with him - your warm hands against his cool hands? wow his kissing is all of a sudden even more passionate.

after the little make out session he's going to go all mushy on you, physical affection of an embrace something uncharacteristic of him to match his dishevelled state

in kisses after the first i like the idea that he checks your pulse mid make-out and just silently smirks/chuckles when he notices it's faster and more erratic than usual

"Why are you nervous, this isn't our first time."

he also has this sneaky habit of whispering incredibly close to your ear, the reason why i choose to point this out it because i feel like sometimes he uses his evol to his advantage to like, breathe out cool air on your neck/ear and likes to watch you shiver

the ultimate dominant figure if you try to kiss him first and take control he somehow manages to overcome you and take the lead without using his strength, just good ol' sweet talking and technique

congratulations, you managed to snatch a kiss from the renown leader sylus!!!

i can see why people would think he's promiscuous or a fuck-boy because honestly i see it, but imo just because he is more flirtatious, assertive and... responsive (try tapping his... crotch... in the café LOL) does NOT = play boy

to me it just shows that - unlike the other LIs - sylus is just more forward with his approach, he has that devil-may-care like feel to him ykwim?

"Do I like you? What type of question is that, isn't it obvious? Or do I need to show you?" is much different to "Hey baby girl lemme rock your world tnite xx"

but just because he's got a 'fuck-all' attitude doesn't mean he fucks around with random people, he's 1. got standards and 2. living in the n109 zone?? do you THINK he can afford to let random people close just to fuck???

that being said i don't think he's a kiss virgin, just very selective and honest man when it comes to love and physical intimacy

now, when i say he isn't a fuckboy, that doesn't mean i don't believe in cocky-smugass-know-it-all sylus - he kisses well. and with PASSION. and probably the worst part is that he knows it.

first kiss with sylus? i can't imagine him making a large fuss about it like rafayel, nor it having to be some "i'm-at-deaths-door-and-need-to-kiss-you-atleast-once" situation like zayne, but no matter where or when you two share a first kiss he is making sure you remember

that being said, there was definitely a LOT of romantic and sexual tension between you and sylus for at least weeks before the kiss, i mean the air was thick with suggestive glances and denial

i think you two'd have to already be in close proximity which is very easy to achieve with sylus (touchiest man award goes to him) for the first kiss to initiate

he's grabbing your waist, or your face, makings sure your eyes are on. him. as you two kiss. watching with delight no matter what reactions you have, he admires you through surprised and flustered to confident and defiant

rather than a tender first kiss it’s probably a full blown make out session, just desire and lust flooding out of the both of you after having built up for over a month.

assertive does not mean he's going to force a kiss on you to clear this up, more that he likes to take the initiative and take control as you two kiss <3

yeah he's into biting (wow what a big shock) - likes biting your ear, or neck, or bottom lip, one time he tried nipping at your tongue too.

you can bite him back, he likes it.

"Hah, looks like someone is baring their claws tonight..." he’s really into that whole cat thing huh.

what does mr sylus do with his hands? waist, hips, ass, around your neck, pulling your face in by squeezing your cheeks, fingers threading through the hair on the back of your head, you name it he does it. again, i think sylus is a touchy man.

he doesn't mind if you try to take control, just dont expect to be successful. different to zayne - as in he will overcome your control with his evol and strength…

inappropriate use of his evol has occurred (he ‘tied’ you up and made out with you (CONSENSUALLY))

after his affinity 15 (i think) memory i can just tell he’s freaky with it bruhhh so yeah handcuffs are probably something he indulges in

if you’re persistent or physically overcome sylus you might get rewarded with a resigned, more submissive sylus

the idea or sight of someone man handling/overcoming his strength really sets him off.. i mean have you seen “no defence zone”?? but you’re really going to need to work to get him to this stage, and he’s going to have to love you

“No one’s ever seen me like this, lying on my back and begging for you.”

secretly finds out through you that he enjoys being dominated (BRAT SYLUS FOR 2024) so climb on top of him and kiss him until he’s blushing and panting hahahahahaha

tldr: sylus isn’t a fuck-boy but he sure kisses like one

AN; as an ao3 writer may say, no beta we die like caleb i wrote half of this when i was half asleep LMAOO anyways i hope this was okay please dont attack me BYE

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Omar Sharif (Funny Girl, Lawrence of Arabia)—Dark and thrilling, strange and sweet, honey in your ear, spice in your mouth, he was Sherif Ali the Arab, Yuri Zhivago the Russian, Colonel Grau the German and much much much more, here's to the one and only Omar Sharif---- Pharaoh of romance!!! (I'm sorry Im stealing lyrics from the song "Omar Sharif" but it ain't lying!)

Toshiro Mifune (Rashumon, Seven Samurai, Grand Prix, Stray Dog)—i love and respect my boi tab hunter (rest in peace you beautiful, beautiful man ❤️), but after i watched like 12 of his movies in a row on tcm last year, i ALSO love and respect toshiro mifune, son of a literal actual hatamoto’s (a high-ranking samurai) daughter, also very possibly related to the best judokan EVER, AND, he’s the guy who SHOULD have been obi-wan kenobi. the fact that he’s ALSO hot as hell just adds to his appeal.

This is one of two polls in the tournament semifinals. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.

THIS POLL LASTS FOR 24 HOURS.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Toshiro Mifune propaganda:

"In addition, he spoke fluent mandarin and every time he was casted in foreign films, he said his lines in the language of the movie (although they ended up dubbing him. He wasn’t happy about it though).”

Submitted: this gifset

Also submitted: this video (yes, that one)

"Crucial Toshiro Mifune propaganda: THOSE LEGS."

"That is hella muscle. Go watch The Hidden Fortress, aka Star Wars A New Hope. His thighs deserve an award."

Omar Sharif propaganda:

"he and Peter O'Toole didn't have the heaviest "we're fucking" energy in Lawrence of Arabia for nothing!"

"Additional Omar Sharif propaganda (I am counting as propaganda both the way he looks and the way Peter O'Toole is looking at him.)"

[mothmans-side-ho]

Armand called Lestat a clown in the most round about way

s2e3 hot wired the two passions in my brain into this info dump, however seeing as a central theme of this episode (and the season) is power, status, and their subversions, it seems relevant. for context, I have 2 degrees in theatre, specifically theatre history and how trends effect form. (I am in no way an expert though, and this is very simplified). long story short, I'm relishing in being a big ol nerd about this entire season

FINALLY, we got to see Lestat (a version of) strutting his stuff on stage in a scene with peak commedia dell'arte shenanigans. Commedia dell'arte is/was an originally Italian form of theatre which was defined by lazzi (comedic bits), improv, and stock characters. these stock characters have been around from Roman times and are still super familiar to us today - the young lovers, the pervy old rich man, the soldier with bravado, etc. It's been seen as a somewhat formulaic form of theatre which relied on quickly identifiable characters and situations so audiences can sit back and enjoy the butt jokes and servant beatings.

In the book - specifically The Vampire Lestat - our beloved Lestat RELISHES in playing a character called Lelio, one of the young lovers. It is in playing Lelio that he "found a tongue for verses and wit [he]'d never had in life" (TVL pg 31). It is in playing Lelio that Lestat first gets a taste of the person he can become, and it is in Lelio that we see the first glimpses of the Lestat which so fully seduces Louis. In short, Lestat casts himself as the suave and handsome romantic protagonist, here to sweep people off their feet. The young lovers are also notably some of the only roles portrayed without masks, to emphasize their youth and natural beauty.

SO IMAGINE MY SURPRISE WHEN LESTAT SHOWS UP IN S2E3 DRESSED LIKE THIS:

He has a half mask! He's wearing all sorts of colors! He's clearly acting as a go between between two other characters who seem to be of a higher status than him! As I said before, commedia dell'arte can be very formulaic (especially by the late 1700s when it is being codified away from being improv focused to being cemented into scripts). From all of these visual and characterization clues, Lestat is not playing Lelio the young lover, he's playing a Harlequin! And his costume seems to be heavily based off of this Harlequin (Arlecchino, Arlecino, etc.) which is literally the wikipedia image of a Harlequin.

(note, if you give a fuck, this image is depicting an Arlechino from 1671, roughly 125 years before Lestat on stage. in my mind, this accounts for the changes in silhouette, styling, why Lestat doesn't wear the mask for the entirety of the performance, etc. Also, just while we're talking about costuming, I believe the late 18th Century was still a time in which actors would have been expected to provide their own costumes, which would explain why Lestat's version is made with expensive fabrics and includes cunty little details like the bow in his hair. At the very least, I can see him making looking good a priority as the owner of the theater and as...well...Lestat.)

Okay, okay, okay. Why does this matter?

Harlequins are not characters of any social status. They're servants who are quick witted enough to get into antics but stupid enough to be commanded by animalistic instincts (lust, food, you name it). The Harlequin being beaten by their master was ENORMOUSLY funny, and is the origin of the term "slapstick comedy". They a memorable iteration of clown.

In this scene, which I'm willing to bet was inspired by (if not outright) Carlo Goldoni's A Servant of Two Masters, Lestat plays a servant who interacts with two characters. One appears to be a young woman in a breeches part - another common trope of commedia performance. The other appears to be the young male lover! We see Lestat prancing between the two, seemingly facilitating some romance plot, being paid for his compliance, and doing a good ol fashioned butt lazzi. (Could he be presenting his ass for beating? Maybe.)

So why is Lestat not the young valiant lover, but instead A LITERAL CLOWN? Three potential, not conflicting, reasons. By the time Lestat is performing (mid to late 1790s, based off Armand's earlier comment about Robespierre's 1794 execution), the Harlequin characters were the most sought after roles! At this time, we are seeing the emergence of "Celebrity Culture" where audiences sought out actors for their off-stage personalities as much as their on-stage ones. This is an extremely fitting position for Lestat to fall into. Yay a semblance of historical accuracy!

Secondly, Lestat's ENTIRE ROLE in season two is to come between this season's new pair of young(ish) lovers: Louis & Armand. Lestat's function is to repeatedly detract and distract from their relationship through Dreamstat's antics (appearing at the piano calling Louis a whore, having Louis re-kill him, etc.). Additionally, simply put, Lestat (and Sam Reid as Lestat) is a lot of fun to watch. He is absolutely a stand out (if not THE stand out) of the show! His constant ability to serve cunt is often what your eye is drawn to, he pulls focus to himself, and often undercuts the more subdued, philosophical, and morose nature of others. Both on-stage and on-screen, Lestat continuously upstages his screen partners. He does kinda function as a Harlequin. But in the end, the Harlequin's antics are also what ultimately drive the young lovers together. If not for Lestat's actions, Louis and Armand would have never met nor bonded over knowing this fucked up brat prince.

But we also have to remember! This portion of the episode is presented by Armand the mind fuckery master. It is absolutely in his best interests to paint Lestat as some sort of ridiculous, lesser being driven by animalistic nature. Especially if - by extension of the metaphor - this frames he and Louis as the virtuous and optimistic young lovers, striving to cling to each other in a world of chaos. I would be EXTREMELY interested to see if, when recollected by someone else, Lestat appears in a different role or characterized differently.

Again, given the celebrity culture of the time and Lestat being himself, it is entirely believable that he would appear in the Harlequin role (Truffaldino, if this is Goldoni's Servant). However, I think it's extremely telling that in Armand's iteration of the story Lestat is not the dignified, refined, and sympathetic young romantic. He is instead a literal fucking clown.

[maevelin]

Colin Bridgerton needs to suffer meta.

Wait...wait...hear me out first!

I am one of those fans that want to see Colin Bridgerton SUFFER for Penelope yes. BUT with good reason I promise.

Because aside from the book material here in the show Colin had a different path in some stories. He believed himself to be in love and got heartbroken because of it.

He actually needs to feel that burn, that suffering to realize what being truly in love actually means. To actually feel there is no comparison to the real thing. To feel that what he believed being in love meant was not actually real or comparable in any form or way with what he is capable of feeling...for Penelope. (Book reference: This was Penelope...and this was love.)

No one can blame him for seeing Penelope as a friend so far. I think that is understandable but he also is a man who has had privilege in all his life, he has traveled the world from his secure place and is oblivious when it comes to certain things. He is a great guy, loving, devoted, honorable, a flirt and whatnot, but in order to mature he needs to go through some serious introspection. He does need to find his purpose and I would like to see that too in this season (himself as -book spoiler- an aspiring writer too).

I also want him to feel the pain and the struggle that comes with the LW reveal for him to realize that when we speak about a love of the magnitude he feels for Penelope not even what he deems as betrayal can make him give her up. It just does not matter. He will defend her no matter what, he will love her no matter what.

Let me quote Doctor Who for you (yes again):

"You betrayed me. You betrayed my trust, you betrayed our friendship, you betrayed everything I ever stood for. You let me down!.... Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?”

THIS is what and who Colin Bridgerton is for Penelope but to get there he first has to realize it and for that he needs a shock. HE NEEDS THE DRAMA. He is a Bridgerton guys if he is not a messy drama queen who suffers then what is the point? lol... Colin needs to have that maelstrom of emotion. The whirlwind. The pain, the jealousy, the YEARNING, the realization. He needs to be brought down on his knees (I do not oppose to the literal thing btw lol) before he rises again. Stronger than ever. And on the ready to protect his WIFE.

There is just no other way. And I will sure enjoy this because this...is what falling in love is and this season is about romance and Mr. Colin Bridgerton is our MALE LEAD HERO and as SUCH I want him to earn his position which means: HE IS OUR BELOVED IDIOT! YES HE IS GONNA SUFFER. YES I WILL CHEER FOR IT. YES I WILL BE HAPPY FOR MY GIRL PENELOPE AS THIS HAPPENS. YES TO ALL!

IT IS TIME!

I waited long enough! Now bring me season 3!

[feelinungry]

and i will always, always, be defending the "plot-holes" that are not actually plot-holes at all. i've seen people on facebook complain so many times about the ending of the game - about the siege of talmberg to be more exact.

"just attack it", "just take it down", "why doesn't divish just do it", "ohh his wife he can't even fuck! nobody gives a damn", "henry doesn't even really care for radzig at this point" etc.

and i have to go back to that one solitary thing this game literally cannot exist without: love. it's the main aspect, it's the pillars the story stands on, it's everything.

medieval movies and books like to picture the old times ala skyrim: "my son was very young when he died. but he did so while doing his duty. he fell for skyrim! he fell for the empire! i do not mourn for i am proud!"

"oh, i loved my father more than anything. but he is gone now. that is life."

it is. but. hear me out. people back then - were actually just like people now. we break down when we lose someone we adore, cherish, love, protect. no matter how stoic we may be, we don't take it lightly, do we?

so, if you think about it, is it a plot-hole, when divish refuses to attack his castle because

it's his home and he loves it

his wife is in there

his friend is also in there?

robard would not attack if it were divish in there. radzig would not attack if it were henry in there. hans would not attack if it were hanush in there. istvan would not attack if it were erik in there. captain bernard would not attack if it were hans in there.

it all comes back to love. and wanting people you care about safe.

martin running back to certain death because his wife is in the village when the cumans attack.

both parents worrying about nothing but their beloved son even while they are being brutally murdered.

everyone on talmberg willing to lock henry up just to keep him away from skalitz (for reasons yet unknown).

theresa making a last stand for someone just as lost as her.

the understanding he's met with when henry comes and admits his failure to radzig, the fact that he went against direct order. (nothing, absolutely nothing else but radzig being in debt to martin, or radzig being someone close to henry, could explain the understanding, the acceptance, and the outcome of the whole situation. how do you think henry - who is just a young man, not a hero, not a dragonborn, not a chosen one - would get away with all this?)

henry backed out of the night raid on talmberg because hans was wounded and wouldn't survive long enough for the mission to succeed.

hans (in one of the outcomes) carried him out on his back, saving his fat ass. no time for glory, no time for saving the hostages when it's suddenly your best friend who is on the ground and bleeding out. he might have succeeded with the mission. yet he didn't hesitate when suddenly it was him who was put in the shoes of those who just wanted to keep their loved ones safe. it was stephanie for divish (he approved the raid). it was radzig for henry (he was the one who went first and most willingly). and it was henry for hans (who immediately backed out on henry's behalf). all those actions were based on love.

would you attack talmberg, knowing there was someone you loved? someone you wanted to know better, someone you wanted to learn how to love, someone who could have been much closer if he only tried? someone you only just met?

the whole story starts with love, continues with love, ends with love. it is everywhere you look and you don't even have to romance anyone to see it, to feel it. it is in the npcs' lives, it's the motivation behind so many actions. it's in henry's decisions. in your decisions.

because, don't you just love this game?

[antimony-medusa]

Okay so, there is a thing twitter does and you sometimes see it here, when people are professing that a certain block man relationship is platonic, and/or that anything else is boundary breaking. The stance is that you love the platonic relationship so much, and anything else is "weird". So you're defending from the weirdos.

And the thing is, I am not intending to say that you personally have to be comfortable with romantic or sexual relationships when it comes to the block men. If you go "y'know this is not for me", that is 100% fair. That's why I do think that appropriate tags are so important, so that you can curate your space. However. This specific interaction has been sitting in my head for days.

First of all like slimarina has repeatedly rped gay sex on stream, artists drawing them kissing should not be getting death threats on twitter. Second of all— why is it weird. Why are you saying specifically that a relationship between two men is weird or bad or unclear inappropriate? Do you know what you sound like when you say that?

Cause it isn't just "keep the nsfw away from the minors", which is fair and based. Tag that shit. People also acted like this with beeduo when all we were talking about was handholding and kissing, which a) they were making jokes about lap dances on stream, I don't think a kiss is too far, b) handholding your beloved is a behaviour that shows up in humanity in *middle school*. Like this was the type of romance that would show up in disney movies, and people would be like "I am protecting the streamers from the weirdos" by saying that this is abhorent and you're a degenerate if you think about it!

Cause the thing is, when you are saying that queer romance is somehow inappropriate for minors, or saying that a "gay couple" is incompatible with the concept of nsfw without being weird, this is indistinguishable from homophobia. It is literally a homophobic talking point, that gay romance is inherently sexual and inappropriate, and that gay sex is inherently weird and bad. This is a thing politicians are using to push regressive political agendas.

A lot of people are not comfortable with nsfw and that is fine, but when you are making broad statements about sex and romance In General, you start to fall into some traps where like, literally I have heard these talking points from evangelical christians telling me that sex would make me inherently unclean and broken. I am begging people to draw a distinction between "i don't want to see that" and "all of that is bad/weird/inappropriate/should never be talked about in public".

Uncomfortable with slimarina nsfw? Fine. I don't necessarily want to see slime physics sex either. Saying that all engagement with nsfw between two adults who are enthustically consenting and having fun with it and specifically asking for tiktok edits of the sex scenes but happen to be guys is weird and needs to be defended against? FOLKS. You literally sound like a conservative politician.

Like something like 98% of the population is sexually attracted to other people, at a low estimate. And that is FINE. That is how humanity works. We have social rules about how to navigate that, but it's not inherently weird or dirty or inappropriate to be attracted to people, or to think or talk about sex, or to have sex! Average age of having sex for the first time in north america is 16! People are having sex and that's FINE. I'm not but like, sure I'll read stories that include that as an element, because I'm an adult and it's part of the human experience. I also read stories that don't have sex. Neither is morally superior or less weird than the other just by virtue of if there's sex in it or not.

So like, man. We have GOT to stop assigning anything sexual as bad and wrong. It's just a thing that adults do.

[dujour13]

Fanwork Friday

Thanks to @dragonologist-phd and @arendaes for the inspo to do this – great idea!!

I have a lot of beloved fics to recommend but this week I have to start with two criminally underappreciated PWOTR fanfics by authors I admire. They deserve tons more kudos. It's a thankless job writing less popular ships/characters but it shouldn't be.

Stay: Here, With Me, As I Go / The Links In Their Chain series – @silversiren1101

Ship: Regill Derenge/Minovae Arangeir

I admit I first clicked on this because of what was maybe morbid curiosity at the concept of a Regill romance but I AM CONVINCED. Many times Siren has made me cry literal tears over these two.

I am so in love with this couple. Mino is a Hellknight with a heart of gold who’s been through it all and still comes out swinging, a tireless defender of the downtrodden and just a fave OC of mine. Without compromising one iota (because that would be unacceptable) Siren’s characterization of Regill made even my flaky azata ass melt for him.

Incredibly emotionally impactful writing and deep knowledge of the lore that make the setting and characters come to life. I am insane over this.

Savor Its Sweet Bloody Taste / A Pulsing Wound of Need series - urgathoas / @camelliagwerm

Ship: Camellia Gwerm/Valerius Dragavei

This is another one my flaky azata ass clicked on out of morbid curiosity but I AM CONVINCED once again. The gothic horror couple of all time.

It’s sad that in the game a good-aligned KC never gets a chance to know Camellia. Harper fleshes her out in a way that’s chilling but also really endearing and made me fall in love with her (from a safe distance). And then there’s Valerius, the Urgathoan dhampir lawyer who uses his mythic power to turn Drezen into a necropolis. Terrifying man in every evil, power-hungry, bloodthirsty way and so damn cute about Cam.

Gorgeous prose full of just the perfect touches of descriptive detail. So much fun to read.

[qprsmackdown]

c!Emerald duo propaganda:

Let me tell you. We've got two guys. They live together. They live miles away from everyone else but they live in a little cabin in the snow together. They would die for each other. One HAS died for the other. One is in a monogamous relationship with the personification of death and the other is one of the most widely headcanoned aroace characters and it in no way ever devalues what is considered as one of the most unshakable relationships in the story

"For you the world" — Technoblade to Philza. They are so loyal to each other, legit the healthiest and strongest relationship in the fandom

"For you, the world, Phil." -Technoblade "Sometimes one friend is all you need." -Technoblade “I’m following Techno to the gates of hell... and if he wants to take over the world, god dammit I’m gonna help this man.” - Philza “I followed him to the ends of the earth, through fire and flames.“ - Philza (about Technoblade)

They live together. They kill together. They're raising a polar bear and a very anxious enderman hybrid. They committed so many war crimes and looked good doing it<3 "For you, the world" quote my beloved. Anarchism swag😎

Silly guys of all time! They took over the entire world together once <3 (pre-dsmp but still canon to dsmp) they blew up a country together <3 gotta love 2 guys who commit Literal Actual warcrimes. Also the way they trust eachother just unconditionally is just soo ouuuugggghghhhh i love them. iirc I remember a part where techno was basically just talking about how he'll basically never trust anyone again. TO Phil. Who was very obviously an unspoken exception to the "never trusting anyone" thing. It's been a while so idk if I remember it right but aaaouuuugggg their relationship was so good. Also "for you the world phil" AAAAAUUUUUUU (although the context of that line is much sillier than people usually remember but they are silly guys <3). Ooouugghhh I have so much I could talk about but it's late so I can't think of it right now but they are sooooooo important they are everything to me. This is kinda bad propaganda bc I don't know if I'm even remembering things right and am vaguely incorrect but AUGH. EMERALDDUO

Consider: the fanon immortals being very old friends thing which is a trope i will never not love, and also taking over the world with your qpp is so pogchamp of them

Two anarchist immortals who have been besties for an indeterminable amount of time, but at least for hundreds of years. Took over the Earth once just to show that they can. Back-To-Back Badasses. Each other's consciences and also enablers. Lived together in the middle of nowhere tundra biome, in connected little cottages with their bazillion pets.

THOSE BITCHES WERE LIVING IN THE ARCTIC TOGETHER IN THEIR GAY LITTLE COTTAGE WITH LIKE 100 ANIMALS!!!! They’d both often talk about how they’d kill and die for one another, they’ve been together for centuries despite Techno being all but confirmed Aroace and Philza being married to someone else!! I think they definitely had a QPR going on because like. The person you’re closest to and have lived alongside for god knows how long u gotta at least have SOMETHING going on there imo.

They are both imortal livelong best friends who have been there for each other through war and and other personal hardships They are partners in crime, both arnarchists who took down a nation together and both live in retirement together They only trust each other wholeheartedly (aka they both belive the other wont betray them) and Phil is the only person Techno feels he can be himself around (aka be soft around).

Apparently their qpr had drama in the past bc of this one fic but tbh i dont really get why These two are literally just. The best. There's absolutely no romance between them, but they're the closest of friends, and they care about each other so so much. And they deserve all the things. They live together in a house in the arctic in a commune for anarchists. Basically everyone in the Syndicate are their adopted children. 'For you, the world, Phil' -Technoblade (Just like to say this too, Techno is not Phil's son in the DSMP universe. It's been canonically confirmed.)

They’re two dudes who spend all their time together, built their houses next to each other (and connected it w a bridge), started a commune together, took over the world together, have FRIENDSHIP EMERALDS, and are genuinely such good friends (these are the characters but the irl guys were really good friends until techno died too)

Just a bird and his pig chilling as kings

"for you phil, the world" is treated like this big dramatic line as they take over smpearth but in context its bc they were arguing over something silly and techno laughed and conceded to him and like... just look at then they're ride or die besties emerald duo ftw (on a sadder note i constantly see philza wearing techno's merch on streams and videos and just... man i miss seeing them together)

immortal warriors who have promised to follow each other to the ends of the earth, through fire and flames. they are each others most trusted person without a doubt. when trying to retire from the wars that plagued the server, they both retired in an arctic tundra where they lived together.

These guys cant be seperate from each other anymore than like three days. Like, on top of also doing the antarctic empire together in earthSMP, they just moved to the arctic together to just enjoy life and retirement together. They understand each other like no other bc they've known each other forever. Also bc if we take the titles of bloodgod and angel of death literally you get something something being willing to spend eternity with the other because you care abt them. These two are fine being isolated from everybody else and chilling on their own bc thats all they need

Their relationship is defined by a connection that has lasted for centuries. Despite everything, they always go back to each other. They live together in a cabin in the arctic. They also like murdering together a little too much.

old men committed terrorism and then they settled down :)

For you Phil, the world Immortal best friends spend thousands of years together, conquer the world, found a empire. Phil has a kid with his goddess wife, Techno wind up joining the kids rebellion against the country he founded. When that goes wrong they start a commune called the Syndicate. They are so ride or die. I love them

please they live together theyre best friends theyre immortal together they love each other and phil is married to a god PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

[jenyifer]

Book List Time!!!

And with that I have 10 give or take books to discuss. Now I’m up to over 30 books since May woooo telling tumblr about each one has been a great motivator so I hope my reviews and list help people out in a non spoiler fun way. Gonna rank these in order I want to reread them.

1. Green Creek the series by TJ Klune 🏳️‍🌈🐺🌶️🌲 Wolfsong Ravensong Heartsong Brothersong I am obsessed. Literally read all four books in 3 days. I have bought physical copies and marked them up. Will make you cry, laugh, and stay in your heart forever. Just……. Go read it. But the quick synopsis is Powerful Humans Wolves Witches have to pay for the sins of their fathers over and over again while maintaining their found family and finding their true soulmates. There is Ace Lesbian non binary rep in here as well.

2. The Warden by Daniel Ford🏳️‍🌈 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🧙‍♀️❄️🪦truly a fantasy masterpiece the romance isn’t the focus but it’s fucking good. First sapphic book to get a 10/10 for me. About a witch(with a magic system that is interesting surprising) growing up and finding herself a family without sacrificing who she is. I loved her and at first you think ehhh is this going to be boring no definitely not. Was surprising made me laugh and cry. Can’t wait for part 2 cause more of the hot gf in there I hope.

3. A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland🏳️‍🌈👑⚔️🌶️🌶️ I listened to this book two times in a row I enjoyed it so much. It’s a bodyguard and prince story. The prince’s depiction of depression anxiety panic attacks was so real. The bodyguard is very endearing. The themes of family are strong and interesting. The mystery was easy to solve but I found it rewarding because I wanted the prince to win so badly haha.

4. Spindle Splintered by Alix E Harrow🏳️‍🌈👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👸🏼🥀😢

Short story about a dying girl who has a special interest in sleeping beauty. It does have a…. Debatably Sad ending. I did enjoy it for what it was trying to talk about. I lost a friend when she was too young. I’m glad I read it.

5. Scumbag Villains Self-Saving System series by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu 🏳️‍🌈🚩⚔️😈🕊️🤓🌶️? I’m putting it up this high because besides that scene in chapter 21 that slapped me in the brain I really enjoyed the series. Only Danmei I HAD TO GET THE REST OF THE SERIES IMMEDIATELY Hell I’ve even now written fan fic for the side ship. About a Nerd being put into his favorite love to hate stallion novel (story about a hero who fucks his way to success) but he’s in there as the abusive villain who the hero is destined to kill. The nerd has to save himself and unintentionally builds himself a harem featuring the most red flag the hero who so sololy motivated by the nerd. It’s great easy to read very fun. But 🌶️ scene in book 3 is a definite skip and delete from memory.

6. Case File Compendium Vol 1 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou 🏳️‍🌈? 😈🚩🩸🕵️🥼

I did just finish reading this so maybe I’m bias but I really did find it a book I couldn’t put down. I even brought it with me to work to read a chapter during my lunch breaks. Main characters are heavy in their homophobic lifestyles but they kiss and protect each other? True crime and mentally ill characters. MC is has a fatal mental illness that makes him unstable and MIL was his former private doctor. MC is trying to date MIL’s little sister. While getting up to shenanigans they stumble into a corrupt hospital and evil forces are maybe after them?! Idk its exciting fun to read but only if you like 🚩’s

7. The Disabled Tyrant’s Beloved Pet Fish Vol 1 by Xue Shan Fei Hu 🏳️‍🌈🐟👑🎨🖼️ I did genuinely laugh my ass off during reading this book. It was incredibly easy to read I think I finished it in 4 hours. Very cute. I love the inside and outside art. About a nonverbal Prince who has anger issues and his crush on the modern man who is trapped within an ugly little fish. Now yes the Prince is becomes actively in love with the fish. Lucky for us we are stuck in the man who is trapped as the fish’s pov and he is genuinely just trying to get back to his world by obeying the powers that be System’s prompts to go home. Fish is not trying to seduce the Prince or anything. It’s just funny I had a great time with vol 1 probably will read vol 2.

8. So Let Them Burn by Kamilah Cole 🏳️‍🌈👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨🐉🏝️ while having dragons and diverse cast it ultimately falls short of expectations wishing for more depth and clarity. The asexual spectrum representation feels muddled and Jamaican inspired cultural elements are unexplored which is at odds with its rich backdrop that could have enhanced the story. The story’s mystery element lacked cohesion resulting in a frustrating bittersweet ending that suggests a sequel and left me unsatisfied. I won’t read the next book. Won’t suggest it.

9. Faithless Book2 by C L Clark 🏳️‍🌈🚩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩⚔️👑😩 a big let down from book 1 but I’m locked in for life I guess. Luca is back in France navigating a way to get the crown. While Touraine shows up with a priest and Teen to some how get food for her people. Most of the plot feels useless both MC characters are stupid and do no growing. The new teen character was interesting. I disliked the poly romance I didn’t particularly feel comfortable about Touraine and Luca why not add another person in what could go wrong? Luca’s reign as Queen looks to be very bad and you will feel extremely disappointed at the end. I’m going to read the next book but only because I like the characters who didn’t go to France.

10. Self-Made Boys by Anna-Marie McLemore.

I read 90% of this book and I regret it. It’s a trans characters as the leads gay retelling of the great gatsby. I was truly excited to read it I’ve read The Great Gatsby many times. However this book just laughs at the source material. I’m tempted to say maybe the Chat GPT’d the plot and didn’t ask for any over arching themes in the book. I couldn’t do it I’m gonna have to find a better trans representation book in my next set of ten.

DNF’s

Last Night at the Telegraph Club, The Once and Future witches, Gearbreakers, the emperor and the endless palace.

[lurkingshan]

10 Things I Love About 3 Will Be Free

I am very late on this one, I know it! But this week I finally sat down with @wen-kexing-apologist and binged the whole thing, and had a grand ol’ time doing it. @waitmyturtles the verdict is two enthusiastic thumbs up. This was such a fun romp, and here are a few of the things I loved most about it:

SHIN MY BELOVED

Guess who has a new blorbo!! In hindsight it is absolutely absurd that it took a Tay Tawan girlie like me so long to watch this show, because Shin is an instant entry on the all-time fav characters list. I love his sad gay ass. He’s sensitive, he’s lonely, he’s repressed, he’s far too susceptible to Stockholm syndrome, and I would protect him with my life.

Mae

A working class trans character with an actual plot?! Thank you for your endless gifts, P’Jojo. Sure, my girl Mae made some questionable choices (just a little light murder!), but listen, I support her, in the words of @wen-kexing-apologist, embracing her feminine rage. And in the end, she figured out exactly the right target for her rage and lived her best life.

Miw

A Survivor. Gets shit done. Absolutely will kill a man if he forces her hand. Loyal to her boyfriends even when it would probably be smarter to ditch them. Also, she so pretty.

Neo’s tanks and crop tops

I never claimed not to be shallow.

Neo and Shin’s backstory

Episode 5 was my favorite of the show and the moment it really clicked for me. I loved getting a glimpse of Shin’s lonely and dejected teen years (I just wanna talk, Ken 🔪🔪🔪). I loved that the basis of Neo and Shin’s relationship and initial attraction was the way they played together. Shin laughed more in his few days with Neo than he probably had in the several years preceding them. I loved that Neo gave him his first kiss and that Shin treasured those memories so dearly.

The Worst Criminals Of All Time

Truly remarkable these three are still alive by the end of the show. Their ideas were half-baked and their execution was severely lacking. They never had a plan they thought all the way through and they never had a single scheme that went off without a hitch. Luckily, the bad guys chasing them were also thoroughly incompetent, so it all evened out. The only smart person in this show was Miw’s mom, who knew the only prudent move was to stay the hell out of this mess.

Miw and Shin’s friendship

I just love that these two developed their own bond, even though they’re not into each other the same way they’re both into Neo. They both risked their lives to save the other. They tease and joke with each other. Shin literally wanted to bring his new bestie home to live with him. They’re adorable.

This weird little guy

Toptap. My guy. What are you doing here and why are you being so strange? Are you good, are you bad, are you chaotic neutral? Who can tell! Certainly not me. But I enjoyed every moment your weird ass was on the screen.

There's a polyamorous relationship, and it’s depicted onscreen!

Okay, here’s the part where I admit my expectations for the poly romance in this show were a liiiiiiilttle off base. I must gently rib the fandom for leading me to believe this show would have any actual sex in it (or really a focus on romance at all) and once again recite to myself a universal truth: gifs removed from context are so misleading. At the same time, I also must acknowledge how groundbreaking it was at the time to depict polyamory at all. I would have loved a bit more time spent on the actual relationship dynamics and the emotional complexities of this triad they formed, but I recognize that’s not really what this show was about and appreciate they included a polycule in the first place. Now that it’s 2023 and he’s been give a lot more freedom, I look forward to Jojo’s further exploration of sexy polycules in Only Friends.

Against all odds, these crazy kids got their happy ending

When this show started I did not see any way for them to come out of this in good shape. I was going to be happy if they simply survived. But not only did they survive, they are thriving! Shin has inherited his dad’s legitimate business and discovered he looks hot in a deep V. Neo and Miw are living that beach life they deserve. Everyone loves each other and everyone is at peace. A+, 10/10, would watch again.

[beanghostprincess]

I have a rant regarding Usopp in the live action, one thing I noticed (and infuriated me) is the many many new fans that inmediatly "clocked" Usopp as the Straight Character™ and are therefore like "well I don't care about straight characters, so im going to ignore him, teehee" and AHHHH FIRST OF ALL IF YOU KNEW THE BISEXUAL VIBES THIS MAN EXUDES, and I don't even want to blame the Kaya kiss because it was cute and they're lovely together 😭 (tho I also see the pattern of which Character the Fandom decides are Straight™ and therefore ignored...)

But I also feel like maybe the Live Action didnt really give Usopp enough moments to shine, here's hoping for more (San)Usopp moments in the second season, they really underuse him in the first one

Okay, first of all, if you think Usopp is straight you're definitely reading his character wrong because look at him. Just look at him.

Yeah, no. This guy doesn't care about gender in the slightest.

And people assuming a guy is straight because he,,, Has a girlfriend,,, Wow,,, A bisexual man who kisses a woman,,, Who would've thought that bisexual people could fall in love with anyone,,, As if that wasn't the literal fucking definition of bisexual. And you could also headcanon him as gay or any other sexuality! Why does he have to be the straight character for having a girlfriend in canon? You can do whatever the fuck you want with it. Fuck canon. People make my blood boil. Also, the whole "I don't care about straight characters" thing is something SO common and it makes me so angry because-- First of all, who said he's straight? He's a fictional character, do whatever the fuck you want with him. And second, it's alright to like specifically queer characters because they give you comfort and representation, but instantly ignoring a character just because they are not queer? Uh. Like, I understand, but it gives me the ick. It's just weird. Off-putting. Because there's a thin line between focusing on the characters you think are queer for comfort and reducing them only to their sexuality and ignoring everything that matters in the show. But you know? I don't think that's exactly the issue here and we both know what it is. Like. Between you and me, anon, we both know.

I am white by the way and I'm not used to analyzing black characters in terms of how the fandom views them and stuff, but isn't it quite curious how Usopp is always the ignored character from the East Blue Crew, and he's often used as a comedy relief in OPLA? "He has a girlfriend and he's straight so we don't care abou-" Sanji has flirted with Nami. Visibly. In front of your fucking screen. And you don't say that about him. Or any other character, really. That's just an excuse and we know and everyone knows and you don't have to analyze shit to know this because it's obvious. And if somebody comes at me saying "oh! But it's just because his personality is softer and he's a coward and most people hate that in shonens so he's a boring character" I am going to fucking combust because everyone knows that if Usopp were white EVERYBODY would be calling him a baby boy and a soft boy and a cutie pie and he'd be one of the favorites (cofcof Koby cofcof) (<- I love him too btw but you know what I mean).

That being said, OPLA doesn't even give Usopp enough screen time to be a character because his personality there is used to crack a few jokes and have THE romance in the show. That's it. He's the comedy relief character and the one who gets the girl because Netflix would cancel the show first before not doing any romance. God forbid people read between the lines, oh my God (<- I love Usokaya and everyone knows btw I am not complaining I cried when they kissed. I'm just saying that that's quite literally all he does. But Usokaya my beloved).

His OWN arc in OPLA is stolen by the screentime used for the Marines and Luffy is the one doing the work. They don't let Usopp follow through with what he actually does in the manga and it's very frustrating not being able to see him shine IN HIS OWN ARC. They barely give him any important scenes in comparison to the other characters. It's incredibly infuriating. See? I am now infuriated.

And now a lot of people watching OPLA have said they prefer OPLA Usopp rather than Manga!Anime!Usopp or that the live-action has made them like him better. I don't know what bothers me the most, really. People literally don't care about the characters, they just want them if they're hot. Which, by the way, it's insulting because if you don't find Manga!Anime!Usopp hot ?????? Please, go to the ophthalmologist because I think you need glasses.

I really hope we get more Usopp moments (hehe and Sanuso moments. My beloveds. They got their four cute short scenes in OPLA and I was the happiest person alive) next season because otherwise, I am going to fucking lose it.

[welldonekhushi]

Thinking of how Sonya and Raskolnikov’s relationship parallels Abbey and Vasili’s relationship and girl it’s genuinely plaguing my mind please please please put me down.

Doomed romance my beloved ❤️

Just think about it- we take defected Abbey and post-Bell Vasili (let’s say hypothetically they’d speak to each other again; I don’t think either of them would even want to but for the sake of this say they do)

Both of them, deeply fucked up after their respective traumas- see the other as a representation of it. For Abbey because Vasili being alive ‘proves’ that delusion that her entire life is an endless loop, and for Vasili because, well, she was literally there while it happened.

Now, this is the kicker; Abbey knows the horrible shit that Vasili’s done as both a KGB agent and a Perseus, that her perception of the man is only what she knows during his time as Bell, and that her feelings are unrequited, is still in love with him. However, she doesn’t think he’s a terrible person undeserving of redemption or forgiveness.

I’d love to elaborate more on this but I’m drawing a huge blank 😭😭😭

Bonus: I imagine the first time they’d see each other again, Abbey would genuinely think Vasili’s there to kill her. And honestly? She doesn’t blame him.

“Just make sure you aim for the head this time, and please let my cats out from upstairs. Go ahead, I knew someone was going to get me. Shocked that it’s you, but at least it’s not anyone else.”

Sorry for the really late reply but.. LIBERTY YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR MY THERAPY RFN 🫵🏻

Literally, the four of them in their own universes.. doomed to the narrative and choose to live with that one suffering for the rest of their lives. Vasili knows he has become something ever so worse but Abbey still wants to assure him it's never too late to redeem yourself as if she's the only one who understands him.

AND NO WAY YOU DECIDED TO WRITE THAT VERY LAST PARAGRAPH,, this is just adding more pain to the suffering as if Vasili is choosing to abandon or kill the people he used to consider them beloved like he totally gave up on life and humanity, as he feels he's not even a hero anymore.. or something like this — if he'd be doing this just to end Abbey's suffering? As an act of love? And later on killing himself in the process too — oh shit, what am I doing, so much pain in one go ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ

[bruciemilf]

PLEASE KEEP GOING WITH THE KITANA/HAVIK STUFF IT'S COOL AF AND IT'S KINDA GROWING ON ME...

I love being enabled <3

One sided enemies to reluctant friends to Something to Secret Lovers, my beloved

Am not gonna sit here and tell you Havik magically loses all resentment for political establishments/monarchiest just because Kitana is a positive element he can associate those things with bc that ain’t it lol

“Not all monarchs and totalitarian autocracies cosplaying democracies are evil we can just co exist 🥹” that’s amazing if you like wack shit!!!

.he’s the hobie brown of his universe, in case it wasn’t obvious.

He was a punk, she’s burdened with duty, and devoted to a crown poisoned with responsibility . can I make it more obvious

“Your mom wants to keep you on a path that’s boring. I’m gonna lead you to a path that rocks!” “Oh that sounds lovely ☺️”

Havik intentionally snaps off body parts just to freak her out; Kitana never reacts unless he’s cracking his knuckles.

This man deadass twisted his neck off and she doesn’t blink, but god help him if Kitana catches him slouch “you’ll hurt your back!” “I am literally a zombie”

Heavy make out sesh in the throne room/her bedroom/just anywhere that’s a Space. Kitana thinks they’re being incredibly stealthy with their forbidden romance. They are not.

Kitana: is there a motive behind Tanya visiting your room at such a late hour?

Mileena: is there a motive behind your breath reeking of roadkill

“absolutely can’t cook for shit” bf + “this is delicious and anyone who dares disagree shall face the wrath of my tiny fists” gf

Havik’s love language is bullying; Kitana’s is quality time. Don’t misunderstand tho Havik KNOWS he’s got a goddess in his hands and worships the soil she blesses with her feet

He just shows it. Differently!!

“How can you not fucking forsee it’ll rain, now you’ll freeze; of course I’m physically shielding you all day.”

HAVIK IS FUCKING BIG!!! Huge!!! Big ASS MF!!!!! He takes full advantage of it. Am absolutely insane about this man’s back, shoulders, thighs. Kitana spies his statuesque, burly but beautiful anatomy with a discreet eye (she’s not discreet)

Kitana wearing red to match him and Havik wearing blue for her. They are EQUALLY whipped

Pls. Imagine the teasing

Johnny: You know, I hooked up with a princess too, once

Havik: She doesn’t need to be payed to act interested, Cage

Sindel: Be careful with Havik. His ambition is damning

Kitana: His vision is bright, mother

Johnny: I love a beauty and the beast story

Havik: Stop showing her your meaningless films! I’m tired of watching them!

Mileena: A man, sister?

Kitana: It seems I have no valid defense

Johnny: 20 bucks says my boyfriend beats your girlfriend, any day

Havik: Are you so desperate to lose?

[sadlilghostt]

THE BEACH

Shuntaro chishiya x f!reader

Warnings : swearing, mentions of harrasment.

Genre : romance?

PART TWO

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

The walk to "the beach" this chishiya guy is taking me is.. Not so awkward nor tense, just a chill walk. He really gives off this mysterious and smart vibe yk? It's quite intriguing.

For after a long walk we finally made to a bridge and across the bridge there I saw a big.. Hotel? But the signs were crossed though. It's says "The beach Utopia" what an odd choice of name though.

And I guess he really isn't lying about the electricity and full of people part. Once we got inside I was greeted the smell of alcohol and the smell of sex in the air that made my nose scrunched up in disgust, blaring music and giggles and screams of people partying in the pool. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘦.

Walking through the crowds eyes of the people inside were stuck on me and chishiya. What's their deal? Why are they looking at me like I'm some kind of an alien. Feeling annoyed with their eyes, i glared to whoever I made I contact with.

" why are they looking at me like that. " I asked the man in front of me, chishiya.

"Probably because it's the first time I bring someone here. " he answered with his signature smirk. Seriously does this man can only make one expression?

I just nodded in acknowledgement as we continue on making our way to the head of this utopia.

Finally with all the walking we stopped into a big door with two Simingly guards in the side.

" you might wanna take a deep breath and lengthen your patience for this one. " he warns which made me quirk a brow at him. Is the boss here is that bad to make me loose my patience? Huh guess we'll see later, don't wanna misjudge a person again.

I chuckled on my thoughts as we opened the door and invite ourselves in.

I spoke to soon. Once we got inside I see this funky lookin man with a to bathrobe hanging loosely in his shoulders exposing his bare chest. And just wearing a.. Short..

He was freely. Making. Out. With. Two. Womens.

I had to hold myself back from throwing up here and there at the sight in front of me. I glanced at chishiay beside me, he also have the same reaction as mine but less visible?

Once this funky ol' man is done with his.. Session, finally. He greeted us with a warm smile which I find it odd and also walked over at us with his arms open. What the fuck is this guy doing?

I glared at him which he backs away, thankfully.

" why hello there my beloved executive, who's the lovely girl you bring here on our warm Utopia? In fact, it's the first time you bring someone here so I'm guessing she's worth it. " the "boss" chuckled.

" but first let's take a seat shall we? " he gestured at the sofa behind us. No I am not sitting there after knowing he probably make out with some girls in that. Chishiya, to, stayed in his position also having the same idea as mine.

I stared at the man who still had his hand behind him, pointing to the sofa.

" no? Don't feel like sitting? Ok then. " he chuckled.

" so what's your name dear? " he asked.

" L/N Y/N. " I replied shortly.

" well Y/N, it's very nice to meet you. As you may know chishiya here, never really bring someone here with him, so, I would like to know the reason what did you do to change the mind of our little chishiya here, hmm? " he smirked as he leaned closer to eye me up and down before looking at chishiya's direction. I literally smell the strong smell of alcohol in his breath and I almost lost myself there. He's disgusting.

I scrunched up my nose as I back away, glaring at him. I should've bring my pack of face mask before going here.

" she seems interesting, back at the game where I met her, she figured out the little twist on the game. Oh and the difficulty of the game was 8 of hearts plus, she remained calm in the entire game. Honestly, if it weren't for her I would've actually fall for the trick. " chishiya chuckled. Isn't he over-complimenting me right now?

" who knows, she might be a better player then I, she might even have played most of the cards we still haven't gotten. " chishiya added with a confident smirk. Why is he more confident then I am?

I glanced back at Hatter, he seems to be Intruiged at his "story" he hummed for a few moment before turning to me.

" if it's alright Y/N, may I see your cards? " I quirk a brow at him. What cards?

" you know the cards that you get after you played the game? " oh.

I slid my hands on my baggy cargo pants finishing out the cards I got.

" I'm not here that long, so, I don't have much. " I nonchalantly stated which Hatter nodded in response. I handed him the cards which he gladly took it.

Once he got the cards examining it careful, his eyes slowly widening. This also perks the blondes attention.

" my.. I guess you are right about her having good cards chishiya. " Hatter chuckled as he handed the cards to chishiya to see. Chishiya took the cards and examine it his eyes slowly widens.

" 7 of spades, 6 of diamonds, 8 of hearts, 2 of clubs, 5 of hearts, 6 of hearts. " chishiya began to list out the cards.

" this is.. Really impressive. " chishiya muttered in surprised as he hands them back to Hatter.

Hatter took the cards back as he pocket them in his short.

" well L/N Y/N, before we give you the warm welcome of the beach. I'll explain you what you must and mustn't do in this utopia. It's quite simple actually. " Hatter smirks as he started to walk back and forth while explaining. I crossed my arms on my chest as I quirk a brow at him.

" ok first, RULE NUMBER ONE, you must wear bath suit, bikini perhaps. " what.

" RULE NUMBER TWO, you can do 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 you want in the utopia, and by what I mean 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. Sexs, drugs, are permitted, get high is smokes AND get drunk however you like. " Hatter smiled. I grimaced at the thought of it. No way in hell i'd enjoy those.

" And last but not least, " his smile vanished and turned into a serious look. " Death to all traitors. " I stared at him for a moment before nodding. I don't really care to be honest, I mean, what else I'm about to rebel here? Well unless if this utopia thing gets really stupid.

" for you to stay alive and stay here, you must give me the card whenever you play games. " he explained. I quirk a brow at him before shifting my weight to the left side of my leg.

" why exactly I have to give you my cards? "

( too lazy to explain all of it. )

Hatter gave me a little smirk before starting to explain me on why I should retrieve the cards I could get in my games. He also show me a board with cards in print on it. Some were crossed to. Honestly, his little plan was stupid and ridiculous. It's unbelievable that people believed this without him having a proof to show them that that's the actual way for us to get out of here. Well I guess that's how a desperate person works.

I sighed before nodding and asking him if I could leave. He gave me one of his bubbly smile which I find it quite annoying.

" sure you may, but before all that, since you got some good cards and serious skills, I'm putting you next to chishiya's number. " the both man smirked.

" well L/N Y/N, welcome to the beach, no. 008. " Hatter smiled before giving me a bracelet with a tag on it.

I accepted the bracelet and wrapped it on my wrist before leaving the room with chishiya behind me.

Once were out of the room, I let out a deep sigh, relieved that I'm out of that room, away from that disgusting mans presence.

" so what do you think? " chishiya suddenly asked. I glanced at him for a second before groaning.

" he's annoying and I cannot stand another mere second in his presence. God. " I groaned which I earned a chuckle from the man beside me.

" we're in the same boat. Follow me, I'll show you your dorm. " I only hummed in response as I let him guide me to my suppose dorm.

Once we got there chishiya told em to pick any swim suit or bikini I want in the wardrobe and also adding a a little insult of that rule which I of course insulted it, telling him that it was ridiculous and nonsense which he agreed. He also told me after I'm done with everything he told me to meet him on the rooftop and I agreed. Chishiya and I bid goodbye before closing my door and went to the wardrobe and looked whats in it to wear..

When I laid eyes on them.. I felt myself glaring at them. All of them.. Were 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩. Well actually not all, I found a bikini that is comfortable enough for me to wear. It was a black bikini that isn't that much revealing. Like the panty was big enough to cover my whole ass, oh just to share this information. My ass is actually not that big nor small. And the bra is kinda like a sport bra. I'm honestly really glad there's at least good bikinis here.

I took a bath first before changing into my bikini, once I'm all done. It's time to meet chishiya.

Wonder what does he wants.

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄 :

[professorspork]

So I just read the first chapter of najio’s new fic. And I just need to talk to someone else about it cause wow

pal you caught me right when i was about to leave my second comment so i feel this i get you on a cosmic level i know i understand

(dear everyone else GO FORTH AND PROSPER then come back and scream w us)

i think--

hmm.

okay, first to say: I headcanon Weiss as aro, I have ALWAYS headcanoned Weiss as aro from the moment I actually bothered to think about it at all (a moment I literally have receipts for which, lmao, describes a dynamic HILARIOUSLY SIMILAR IN CONCEPT to the fic in question; I have since relaxed my stance on lesbian Weiss [as we all know I've become a white knight truther and i cannot WAIT for her to fuck that old man])

and yet despite all that it's not until my current WIP that I've actually, like, let myself think about articulating that in fic. despite the fact that I have a very strong stance on not writing things that don't interest me personally, despite my best efforts there's always a people-pleasing part of me that doesn't want to contradict popular fanons outright lest I... I don't know, make anyone feel left out or something. which is ridiculous, I know, because I've experienced firsthand how popular and beloved a fic can be when you actually take a stand with an idiosyncratic position, say the quiet part loud and just live your truth/let the characters live theirs. THAT'S the part people feel left out on. THERE ARE DOZENS OF US!! DOZENS!!!!

there is something so WILDLY FREEING about a fic that perfectly articulates itself by embracing the non-normative, because there's so many wonderful perfect ways queer can look and be and become and we get so romance-pilled about it we miss the forest for the trees. i love a good "there was only one bed" as much as the next girl I am a the biggest moon-eyed romantic of them all but like. that romance means nothing when we aren't letting them be their funky little selves you know?

i'm a sex-meh ace who writes kink fic on the regular for fun and personal satisfaction. i'm not the only me like that! the world contains multitudes and nobody does it better than najio when it comes to embracing the contradictions, the dynamic juxtapositions of truth, and the joy that comes with just Being Fucking Honest

i have no idea if any of this makes a lick of sense but i am very in my feelings