#literally no one reading this is going to relate lmao but what is tumblr for if not screaming into the void

[pidgefudge]

hmm

[unpretty]

please imagine these bullet points as a series of posts made over the course of a semester in 2015, copied from the tumblr tag i made specifically to bitch about my econ/business government and society professor:

lmao econ prof arguing against the fda

we are also supposed to subscribe to the wall street journal for this class ahahaha like hell

I spoke up about this godawful climate change article and about how literally every fact I tried to check was wrong, he tried to argue that wasn’t the point of the article but it totally was

“Does anyone watch Fox News” this class in a nutshell

the professor in the class i hate is talking about how jesus would love capitalism because it has lifted so many people out of poverty

he’s complaining about progressive income tax lmao god i hate this class

LET THE FREE MARKET DECIDE unless the free market makes an anti-corporate decision, then consumers have been misinformed and the activists responsible should be ashamed of themselves

I hope everyone’s ready for Shitty Class Liveblogging because now he’s claiming that gas prices will never go back up and gas will always be cheap from now on and also peak oil is a lie

Now he’s talking about the story of Jonah and the whale as relates to this article he saw in the Wall Street Journal. Across the class, I see a girl squint into the middle distance and mouth the word, “what.”

“is it okay to fire a pizza delivery person who doesn’t want to drive to a bad neighborhood”

this is the literal worst and most bullshit explanation of utilitarianism I have ever experienced oh my god. for the purposes of this class we are supposed to ignore ‘for the greatest number’ as an aspect of utilitarianism. just. completely altering the basic foundation of utilitarianism as an idea. apparently the free market didn’t like the actual definition so they changed it.

THIS PROFESSOR IS PRO-ENRON I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW THIS IS A REAL THING #FREE MARKET IT WAS LEGAL FREE MARKET

“I don’t think we have very many people in the United States dying because they couldn’t afford medication” actual quote from this professor right now

lmao i’m in the class i hate, he’s complaining about net neutrality now

This just in: poor people are poor because they make bad decisions, the wealth gap can be eliminated by teaching poor people how to play the stock market. This is a real thing that he apparently gives presentations about. He gets paid to tell people this.

Shitty professor isn’t going to be there tomorrow but he wants us to come in anyway to listen to a lecture on CD. Not one of his, just generally. Like, a home learning thing he bought. We asked if he could just put it on Blackboard but he said he didn’t know how to put a CD on Blackboard.

lmao I fucking knew this was the great courses. this professor is off at a conference telling people to teach the poor to trade stocks and he’s just having us sit here listening to an audiobook course he paid for about philosophy.

shitty professor is arguing the necessity of child labor in third world countries because otherwise the children would starve and be prostitutes. yes those are definitely the only two options.

oh my god he just argued that the rich are a minority protected by the constitution

I was really embarrassed about getting a 67 out of 85 on this Business, Government, and Society test but then it turned out the class average was 40 and I got the highest grade in the class. My strategy of always picking the answer I find most morally reprehensible is going well for me.

Monopolies aren’t actually that bad! Also, unions are monopolies, which is bad. (i was the only one who got a lot of the essay questions right so I had to read them in class it was awful)

libertarian economist professor gets really emotional about animals and i think he just argued that if elephants were privately owned they wouldn’t be poached because no one poaches cows

It’s my last week in the class I hate before finals and I’m pretty sure he’s arguing that the Enron scandal happened because there was too much government regulation

oh my god he’s arguing that enron was trying to do california a favor by pointing out a flaw in their system (by exploiting it) h my god he’s not even addressing the fraud in their accounting this whole class has been leading up to his passionate defense of fucking enron

[kandavers]

Doodle Dump!

Hello Kandavers Tumblr Nation! If you can't already tell, I've been absolutely BRAINROTTING over www-related content these past few days HEHE

I've been drawing a lot of his interactions with my Beloved Mutuals' OCs and I thought I'd post it here as a mass post because they're Too Silly and Goofy (and Doodly) AND I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO RAMBLE ABOUT IT PLEASE AND THANK YOU

(Warning! Some of them are mmmildlyyyy suggestive hehe) (As a Treat!)

Characters heads up: Will Wayward by Me! Starii by @dianacoreexe Valentine Hart by @chronnellian Mimix by @sleepyzuku Mori Moonlet by @kawaiialeisha

Here's Mimix, Will and Mori jamming together in their MWM Band (Outfits subject to change HAHA we never really got that far with the Designs save for Mimix (common sleepyzuku slay)):

(Adding a Keep Reading button so that the post won't be too Long!!)

And the slicked back hair WWW I drew just for the occasion:

I KNOW I HAVENT OFFICIALLY POSTED A PROPER WWW X MIMIX SHIP POST BUT I've mentioned before WWW and Mimix are in a relationship, and we have this running joke that Mori would occasionally be a third wheel in their relationship it's HILARIOUS !!!

(cw suggestive:)

And shy Mimix got me so weak HAHA:

It's so cute that Mimix can't handle intimacy that well, so Will always helps him take the initative aaa,,, DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN WHEN I SAY I'VE GOT BRAINWORMS

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

"Out of everyone in this entire universe" (The first panel is by Diana themselves for context LMAO)

See, we both agreed that Will and Starii would be Adopted siblings! There's a little bit of lore to it, which is Starii is an Alien whose space ship crashed onto Earth when she was Smaller, and Will, being the Space Nerd (tm) he is, he offered to let her Stay with him while he fixed her ship! (And for context, Winnie is Will's biological sister that I have not designed nor planned yet !)

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

This one is just so funny to me HAHAHA

(cw: suggestive)

But despite the erm... Physical Admiration 💀 Will has for Valentine, I offer you SOFT and WHOLESOME doodles and they make me SO VERY WEAK I AM SO SOFT FOR THEM ARGHHHH

And bonus kissy,,,,

When they say "I love you" while affectionately gazing at each other like that... ouuuu I think I will Pass Out /pos

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

Bonus cute details:

Will used to have just 1 earring pierced on his Left Ear (if I recall correctly 💀 hashtag bad OC creator) but he went to get the other one pierced with Mimix

After meeting Starii, she gave him one of her earrings, so his Right Ear would always have a star-shaped earring! (Don't worry about consistency i literally forget all the time too LOL)

He has one of those succubus-looking tattoos on his tummy 😳😳 Solely because I think it's cute and ZESTY and it has 0 things to do with his character but thats okay. <3

And honestly shout out to All These Artists for feeding my delusions and brainrots at 2-3am even, with their ideas and headcanons too, they got me Giggling and Kicking my Feet and Everything WAAA

I REALLY LOVE HOW I AM ABLE TO CREATE THESE COOL AND MUSHY OC INTERACTIONS WITH THEM <3333 Honestly I love my mutuals so much they're so Amazing hehe

That's the Doodle Dump for Now! Thank you for reading this far and listening to my Deranged Rambles about them !

And last but not least, go follow my Mooties if You havent already 🫵🫵💥‼️‼️ I love You!!! /p

[milkinthemicrowave]

Hey, Doctor Doctor meaning

I made a song called Hey, Doctor Doctor, and it's blown up recently. Thing is, hundreds of people have left me comments confused about what the song means, so I decided to finally put the basic meaning in a text post. Here's a really good animation of the song!! So u can listen :)

Lyrics:

Hey, Doctor Doctor! Could you tell me what's wrong? I know you're very busy so I won't make this too long I got a question 'bout the rain The fog that just won't go away And something quite absurd That I just learned the other day

I asked my friend a simple question 'bout the rain But then they all went quiet and looked at me in a funny way They asked me what I meant So I described the time I spent Avoiding all the puddles Though I still got wet

They said that morning had been a sunny day I asked the folks around us and they all said the same I sat confused, in my wet socks and shoes I shrugged and said "That's right! The sky wasn't gray, it was blue!"

But doctor doctor It's been so very long Since I've last seen the sun It seems they must just all be wrong Unless it's me who's been confused Then why've my blue skies been refused? And hidden from me by my rainy days?

So... what does it mean????????????????????????

Hey, Doctor Doctor is a simple metaphor about depression. People have also interpreted it as being about the neurodivergent experience and a bunch of other things, and those fit too. But I intended it to be about depression. It's about finding out the things you're struggling with aren't just something everyone deals with. The protagonist (I'll call 'em Pot) has to actively dodge puddles to get anywhere and lives in soggy clothes. When Pot goes "man, that rain's insane right?" to their friend, the friend has no clue what they're talking about. To everyone else, it's sunny outside. They don't have to think twice about where they step. At this point, Pot looks insane to everyone else, like they're hallucinating rain. So, even though their clothes are still dripping wet, they go "yeah haha my bad. you're right, it's sunny outside". In the end, Pot goes to see Doctor Doctor about it. You know in cartoons or that one Ronald McDonald ad where the sad person has the little rain cloud over them? That's the idea. It was raining outside one day and I thought "lmao what if only I could see this, that would be insane". Then I wrote a song about it. I totally see the neurodivergent spin on it, because the part where everyone looks at Pot weird definitely accidentally came from my experiences with diagnosed autism. Sometimes my relatable comedy landed: me: "you ever wake up and your brain feels like sludge?" friend: "yeah bro, all the time"

But sometimes my relatable comedy didn't land: me: "you ever walk across the street without looking when you're having a bad day, like gambling?" friend: "...no???" me: "you don't???" friend: "no?? are you okay??" me: friend: me: "I mean I haven't done that in a long time-" (literally did it last week) Ah, the joys of being neurodivergent. Never knowing what's appropriate to say. "Horrified looks from everyone in the room". If this explanation seems too detailed, I really thought this song was a simple metaphor, so I'm REALLY trying to be clear. Most people get it, but there's still hundreds that have been taking it literally. If you read this far, I'm shocked. Nobody ever uses comments on tumblr, but I'd love it if you commented "umbrella" and let me know you read down here. Thank u immensely for reading this far. So, even though I have literally never talked about it on Tumblr before, and don't expect anyone to see this, that's what my song "Hey, Doctor Doctor" means.

[verysium]

what do you read in your spare time? you’re one of the most eloquent users i know, id love to hear how you find the media you consume and what your favorites are

omg ei 😊 welcome back to the inbox! thank you for your sweet words although i'm probably not qualified enough to be considered the full definition of eloquent. i am going to preface this post by saying that i definitely don't read as much as i should, so this list is not going to be comprehensive whatsoever. the last time i even visited an in-person library was like half a decade ago, and since then my spare time has been nonexistent lmao. anyways, here are some of my favorite/most recent reads as listed by author:

POETRY

richard siken: i think siken is already well-known both in the literary world and in whatever booktok deems is popular culture. if you don't already know him though, he is best known for his poetry collection crush, which delves into themes of obsession, gay love, and violent eroticism. i actually read this chapbook unknowingly. as in i was hounding sketchy pdf download sites at 3 AM and saw a man with bloodied lips on the cover and decided to read it. he basically became my summer fever dream after that. the way he juxtaposes images is seamless, smoother than water. only richard siken can talk about violence without making it sound violent. i also enjoyed his other poetry collection war of the foxes, especially "portrait of fryderyk in shifting light." i think light is a common motif throughout most of his poems, and he manipulates it effortlessly. the most recent piece i read from him is "piano lesson." i have nothing left to say that he didn't already say, so i would just recommend reading it for yourself. he is the og big brain when it comes to word play.

ocean vuong: he's unforgettable, and i mean that literally because nobody forgets a person named ocean. time is a mother was exactly what the name suggests: an exploration of grief, loss, and the rewind of time after his mother's death. some of the poems are almost cinematic in quality. "künstlerroman" is my favorite because it feels exactly like watching a video tape in reverse. i think his most famous work is "someday i'll love ocean vuong." it was the first piece i ever read from him, and to this day, it remains my comfort poem.

silas denver melvin: i only recently discovered him through his chapbook grit. i think he's also on tumblr @/sweatermuppet. he writes a lot on the trans experience, and his work gives me a mix of southern gothic and country vibes. would definitely read his other publications if i had the time.

chen chen: one thing about chen chen is that he always comes to devour. my favorite works from him are "self-portrait as so much potential" and "song of the anti-sisyphus." you have to put on your thinking cap for some of his poems, but once you grasp the meaning, everything makes sense all at once.

franny choi: "disaster means without a star" was the entire inspiration behind my first rin fic. i relate to her more personally in regards to the diaspora experience, but her collections are worth reading in general because of the sheer quality.

pages matam: his poem "piñata" was what got me into slam poetry. his work mostly consists of political commentary which i feel is particularly relevant in today's social climate. "on learning america's english" also resonates with people who have encountered the entire losing/learning immigrant tongues experience.

laura lamb brown-lavolie: i've only read one spoken word poem from her, and tbh i only needed to read one. "on this the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the titanic, we reconsider the buoyancy of the human heart" is my two-headed calf poem. one day i will get this tattooed.

brendan constantine: once again, this was the result of me being chronically online coupled with the boredom of an august heat wave. i found "the opposites game" through TED. honestly, i was a bit unsure about it at first, but it's a cute little poem that makes you really delve into the intricacies of craft.

TEEN POETRY & PROSE

yasmeen khan: she could mouth her words onto every square inch of my body, and i would still be coming back for more. ingraining them into flesh is not enough. "movie stars" is by far my favorite work from her. she writes about femininity and womanhood so profoundly. it's tragic, but really i wouldn't have it end any other way.

kaya dierks: her writing is basically middle-of-nowhere small town stoner teenage life but personified. "crushed" is my favorite piece from her. the soundtrack for this work was definitely by ethel cain, and you cannot convince me otherwise.

FICTION

madeline miller: i was first introduced to her when i read the song of achilles. let's just say that book had me nonverbal for the greater half of three months. it was my metaphorical hatchet. i buried it once, and i never want to dig it up again. i read circe a few years later. the first time was during the blue hour at an airport, right between one red-eye flight and another transfer. i don't even remember that experience because i was heavily sleep-deprived. i read it again recently for a literature course, this time for academic analysis. overall, i enjoy the the heroine-centric narrative. typically, i'm a bit wary of novels with heavy feminist themes because they either project their agenda too strongly or they run the risk of misrepresentation. circe doesn't exactly have that problem. it was more about empowerment and less about exercising power over others.

charlotte brontë: as a historical figure, brontë was questionable, but jane eyre most certainly was not. that book rewired my brain, and that is saying something because i have never read any classic by choice. and it is so important to me that jane was the ugliest, plainest girl you could ever imagine. also cus i unironically enjoy angst, and this book was full of dramatic misunderstandings.

yoko ogawa: i love japanese literature, so there is no reason not to include this one here. "a peddler of tears" is one of my favorite short stories. i did not expect the ending at all, but it was welcome. something about violence, body gore, and dismemberment being framed as romantic and semi-erotic just gets to me. sign me the hell up. hotel iris is a hit-or-miss with some people. either you like the fact that art makes you uncomfortable or you shut it down completely. for me, i was alright with exploring some of its darker themes, but read at your own discretion.

NONFICTION

ross gay: he lives up to his name both in optimism and in carefree joy. probably one of my favorite creative nonfiction authors simply based off the accessibility of his writing style. easy to read and understand but still hits you with the full force of a semi-truck. i would recommend his book inciting joy. it's a collection of essays that delve into grief, but since this is ross gay, he makes it seem like a quintessential part of life.

paul kalanithi: sixteen-year-old me was mind blown by him cus before that doctors were shrewish old men with bald spots and sterile coats, not poetic surgeons who dissected the anatomy of word and recited t.s. eliot in the most heart-wrenching way possible. he is everything i want to become in both life and death. when breath becomes air literally does take your breath away.

[melrosing]

which are the books you loved this year? Need to start off 2024 right

these ones! I don't think any of them would make it into like my top 20 all-timers but i enjoyed all of them:

Sagittarius by Natalia Ginzburg: for some reason I cried for about fifteen minutes after finishing this one and it drove me to buy like everything else she's ever written. idk I think this was the year I realised my parents were also fallible humans and so this book specifically hurt a lot

The Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante: Ferrante is another author where it's like I'll literally read whatever she puts out and I don't usually go in for divorce dramas but all the way through I was like damn this would make for a solid A24 movie

Pachinko by Min Jin Lee: v interesting generational epic on a part of history I knew very little about and also made me cry a bit :/

Penance by Eliza Clark: lol I posted a passage from this whilst I was reading, I think it's just a lot of fun, a solid satire of the true crime genre, and also the most convincing writing I've seen about growing up on tumblr era social media. I recced it to a friend who didn't grow up on tumblr but did grow up with me whilst I + our friends were and she was like this is bringing back VIVID memories. I liked Boy Parts as well (her debut novel) but it wasn't a fave this year

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides: what can i say bruh I like generational epics. also as someone else with a big ass greek surname i can really relate to the protag (and Eugenides I suppose) being dialled up by the teacher to read aloud/play a part every time greek stuff was being covered in class

honourable mentions to The Marriage Portrait by Maggie O'Farrell (I liked it well but not as much as Hamnet), To the Friend Who Did Not Save My Life by Hervé Guibert (very moving but came at precisely the wrong time in my life LMAO), the other Natalia Ginzburg books I read, and obvs ASOIAF which i reread every year in the background of my usual pile lol.

[isa-ghost]

hey it's the anon who asked what dr*m did,

I decided to do my own research (mainly cause I was curious) but... I can't find much? let me rephrase it - I did find the allegations from 6ish months ago, that he's going to court with one(?) of them, but that's... all? I didn't find the court's verdict, confirmations, or him admitting either... and any post or video I find has both the OP and the comments mostly on his side and believing that it's either not true or true but not grooming, even people who say they're not his fans or don't even like him.

so Im not sure if the confirmation didn't reach youtube or if I'm searching wrong or something?

but honestly while researching I realized that I cant stand him lmao, gotta agree with some comments I read - he made a mistake by showing more of his personality online, looks like any time he can handle a situation wrong/respond wrong he does it

so dunno, guess I didnt find the confirmation but at least now I don't find his old minecraft videos interesting anymore so theres that

Yeah he can't act properly to save his fucking life

Also I think most of the threads on Twitter and stuff that have all the proof he's guilty/etc is probably long buried, unfortunately. You could probably try to ask around saying you're trying to get the whole picture but tbh it's not a huge deal if you can't. You can try searching my blog but Tumblr sucks with that shit. The fact that this and his other controversies have been buried and lost to the void of the internet is typical white boy with a monstrously big platform shit so I'm not surprised. I never heard any details about court (prob for legal reasons) or a conviction either. All I know is there was screenshot proof from the victim that they talked, and Dr*m confirmed the screenshots were real but didn't say anything about other details. But those details literally can't be false if the screenshots & the shit said in them are true.

Anyway, as far as his other bullshit goes:

People found old kkk meme edits on his yt account through the wayback machine. More than once if I'm not mistaken

He has a history of defending himself using the r slur

He cheated "on accident" in a speedrun (the least important thing ever but everyone always brings it up)

He claimed he was going to donate all proceeds during pride month to lgbt+ charities & he'd do charity streams all month but never did

He defended himself about replying to haters, which would send thousands of his toxic stans after the person getting them doxxed/death threats/etc and he refused to address that it was irresponsible of him bc he was too entitled to immaturely clap back at the antis. Even other ccs, like B/itzel called him out about shit related to how he uses his platform irresponsibly & he unfollowed & shaded them like a bitch baby

The whole "accidental" copycat shit with QSMP/USMP and basically softcore stalking Q/uackity online.

His "apologies" for all of the above fucking sucked in multiple ways. And that's just 2021-Now shit I can remember off the top of my head, I lost my Twitter in May last year so now I get my info from people's posts about it on here or links to tweets.

Everyone largely suspects he spontaneously reignited d/smp lore & started the finale to cover up the groomer thing bc he has a history of doing smth "new and cool" every time he causes drama to divert attention and avoid accountability.

He's also suspected of suddenly rewriting the d/smp finale to paint his Irredeemable Abuser Villain Up Until The Last Stream as a sympathetic poor baby out of nowhere and wrote that his victim, c!Tommy apologized to him, which sends a HORRIBLE message about abusive relationships. T/ommy and T/ubbo have both subtly mentioned not liking the finale and that Dr*m had AWFUL communication during the last like 6+ months of the smp.

He also suddenly showed up in T/ubbo's chat lurking while T/ubbo happened to be mentioning he'd do his own research on the grooming situation instead of blindly siding with Dr*m and it was some shit out of a horror movie is2g, he suddenly dmed T/ubbo out of nowhere during it on discord saying they'd talk about it after T/ubbo wasn't streaming. Basically sounds like he was gonna bias T/ubbo about his innocence. Like he hadn't been in chat all stream long but SUDDENLY he was there the second the topic came up. But the d/smp ccs also can't say anything about the situation since it's a legal matter, so a handful of ccs have just stated/implied they don't support him other ways

He only quit MCC bc he threw a tantrum about how he couldn't practice for it but now that MCC island exists, people were getting better than him. He's habitually a sore loser about that kinda shit

He's got that whole weird "is he, isn't he" bullshit going on about him being lgbt. I personally think he's just catering to his stupid d/n/f shippers bc they like to truth their relationship & sexuality all the time and he's never explicitly said he's bi or smth. He's just vaguely been like "yeeeaahhhh I mostly like girls like 99% but maaaayyybeee I like guys idkkkk. 🤪" But he's also done that multiple times so who tf knows. I'm not gonna fully dismiss him & I understand no one including me is entitled to his specific sexuality, but he has garbage credibility on like everything so I'm neutral on the matter and find it hard to believe him

Not directly him related, but his stans went on a long and horrifying witch hunt on Twitter during the kkk ordeal doxxing, death threatening & harassing ENTIRE mcyt subtwts who spoke out against him and called him out on his racism, performative activism, shitty apology, etc. For example, I was part of S/neeg's subtwt and all my mutuals and me had to go private to avoid getting doxxed. It felt like being raided in some dystopian ass horror film. Entire subtwts were going private, panicking, paranoid they'd get outed & stalked & harassed by people just for condemning racism, raising Black voices, etc. It was borderline traumatic to some people, I know people who lost sleep over it bc they were so afraid.

That's all I can think of off the top of my head but the end of 2021 to early 2022 was a fucking nightmare between him being an immature entitled piece of shit and his stans blindly defending him and going out of their way to endanger people who rightfully opposed him.

[chonidale]

this has gotta be one of the most unserious, irrational things i’ve ever seen. i know this person has a weird hatred for toni because they have no tumblr etiquette (as seen by putting this shit in a nice gifset about a beautiful moment) and always has to mention they don’t like her when they reblog anything of mine that involves her, but to find something to criticize about her locker room conversation with cheryl this episode is beyond.

toni didn’t offer cheryl advice until cheryl was one afternoon away from running away from home, moving across the country and marrying a boy she’d never love. what kind of person would just sit there, see someone struggling alone, about to make a life ruining mistake, and not say a thing? toni didn’t force cheryl to do a damn thing. the only people forcing cheryl to do anything were her parents and toni was the only one telling her that she doesn’t have to do what they want because she’s the only one that can see what cheryl is actually struggling with. all she did was relate to her and tell her why she would regret doing what she was planning, and it was cheryl that decided what toni said resonated with her and followed her advice not to go through with running away from herself. and then sought toni out to ask for more advice, which toni answered by simply suggesting she read a book. where exactly does op imagine toni gave her literally any steps to follow at any point, even when cheryl literally asked her?

and lmao at “i’ve decided you’re gay”, cheryl IS gay and it was painfully obvious over the course of their interactions (you know, the flirting, the dancing, the gay panic, the freaking out at her performance and suddenly parading a boy around the next day). just like clay could tell kevin was gay when he came out to him. things were like that in the 50s, you recognized people like you in many different ways and you’d find subtle ways to communicate safely and be there for each other.

the people that hate choni are really desperately trying to find things to bitch about this season and it’s so pathetic.

[dragon-of-timeless-blue]

@ocean-waters

HI OCEAN 🌊❤️ (⁠｡⁠･⁠ω⁠･⁠｡⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠♡ Sorry, Tumblr got weird and deleted the draft of my response to your ask, but luckily I took a screenshot before the tragedy (because this has happened before), so yeah, here it is

1. What are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

There are so many things that have contributed to building the Frankenstein-like creature person that i am, but I think three basic things (that do not include lessons or lifestyles directly related to my parents) were:

1. the music i listened in my childhood

Literally throughout my childhood I listened to TOO much music and of many types and genres, (in home we had a lot of records and cassettes from my parents, from a compilation of children's songs from around the world to pink floyd) and I think the impact that that had on me was huge, like the being able to know the true diversity that music can bring and the magic of being able to express your feelings in that way is something that I think many of the children my age did not have (my town is small and there were not as many options of what to listened)

2. Educational TV shows and books

It's a bit silly to say it like that, but if it weren't for educational television and how i got my hands on every book about science facts, animals, fantasy, etc that I encounter, i wouldn't be the person I am. the shows I watched made the whole concept of knowledge AND learning extremely fun for me and it helped me in school and, well, reading is one of the things that has had the greatest impact on my life (for a reason I'm studying literature lmao) and many of the lessons from those books continue to guide me today in one way or another.

3. Anime

I won't go into much detail because I would end up writing an essay about how thousands of series marked my life, but let's just say that after finishing watching Dragon Ball Z I was already a different person than when I had started watching it.... and the rest came like an avalanche

14. What’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do?

Diving in a pool.

WHENEVER I SEE LIKE IN FREE! WHO THEY DIVE INTO THE future WATER I'M LIKE: I WANT TO DO THAT!! obviously not at the level of a professional swimmer or anything like that,b just jump into the water and receive it like an old friend, the water is alive after all, but...BUT, the sensations scare me too much, I feel that they would shock me too much. Ironically, the first time I went to a pool (i was like 5) I went into the water throwing myself with all the confidence in the world, that almost made me drown, so maybe my brain remembers that situation and is scared by instinct lmao

17. Name 3 things that make you happy

Chara, my cat, the bastard is too adorable and too spoiled, he thinks he is the god of the world and I believe him, LOOK AT HIM, HES SO AKKDKFLODLELFKDOXKLDNXLD

Spaghetti. is one of my comfort foods, at the level that just eating it makes me feel like life is the most precious and meaningful thing of all

Listen to JOY, It really lives up to its name because it fills me with joy every time I listen to it, IT HAS TOO MANY THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY 🎶i feel so free and joy...🎶

AAAAH THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE ASK, and sorry for the inconvenience

[nataliaphantomhivesblog]

What are your current fandoms??

OH MY GOD!!! I WAS WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME THIS!! LETS GOOOO🥳🥳🥳

1. Black Butler<3

It would've been incredibly distasteful to not put this beauty on top of my list. I have been a fan of this one since 5th grade, the literal backbone of my insanity.

I may complain monthly over the agnoizingly short chapters, but the narrative and storytelling in this manga is one of my favorites ever.

Although you didn't ask, I have the need to mention: Ciel Phantomhive is my child!!

And yes, I am still awaiting Prince Soma's return.

DISCLAIMER: I am not a sebaciel wierdo and my space doesn't welcome the romanticization of pedophila. "waah waah but it's fiction!" okay?? my account is dedicated on fictional stories and characters and I don't want your wacky shit here. Thank you in advance.

2. Bungou Stray Dogs!!!

What a crime it would've been if I didn't mention the reason my account grew in the first place!!

BSD has such a special place in my heart. Tbh bsd saved me during the downfall that was 2021.

I think people who aren't new to my blog know I'm a sucker for Soukoku. I've made extensive analysis on their relationships for 3 years now. When will this brainrot end!?!?

And oh, of course I am forever greatful to the lovely @ryuuaka713 for collaborating with me on various post, I couldn't have done it without her!! Hope life treats you well! You got a tumblr friend always rooting for ya<3

ALSO: If any of you ever want to ask me anything regarding bsd that isn't Soukoku, please do! I love bsd as a whole and would be happy to answer<3

3. Berserk

Let me make one thing clear!!! I am NOT a berserk reddit fanboy who completely ignores and neglects the narrative of this story in order to fill whatever inner void that needs to be filled.

I am suuuper passionate about the Golden Age Arc and the Pre Eclipse era of Berserk, it would be impossible to shut me up about it.

I could go on billion rants about Griffith's character and his actual complexities throughout the narrative. (no, he isn't emotionless, that would destory the whole point of the story lol)

Also I want to give a not-so-subtle shoutout to @bthump for validating every single thought I had while reading Berserk and always providing textual evidence. Thank you for being the light in the darkness of this fandom!

4. Death Note

sighs yes I am still in the fandom of an anime that has only one season and ended so poetically that it makes perfect sense that it doesn't have a continuation yet my brain screams for content when obviously it will never happen.

Before anyone asks, I am not team Light or team L, both of them are selfish people and used others lives in order to beat one another.

I am a constant defender of the fact that the Death Note consumed Light. Not only is it textually stated; but it's visually stated

(Light's eyes get wider and more innocent looking for a reason when he forgets the death note guys!!!)

Anyways, this story is absolutely awesome and I think most people can agree with that.

I don't rewatch this anime often, but when I do I get shooked by the big brain plans and big brain confrontations lmao.

5. Moral Orel

"MORAL OREL SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN CANCELLED!! FOOLISH PEOPLE FEARED IT SPOKE TOO MUCH FACTS" I scream into a void, tears fill my eyes as losing my religion by R.E.M plays in the background.

Seriously though, I love this show; a literal masterpiece. I don't think theres any show that made me incredibly concious of how my own family's dynamic worked as this one did.

Has amazing takes of the human condition and contains life long lessons.

I once made a long post about the generational abuse of moral orel if you want to check it out!

Anyways, if you haven't had the glorious chance to watch this masterpiece. PLEASE DO!! I BEG!!! The whole series is out on youtube!

we don't talk about the first 3 episodes!!!

6. Sonic!!!!

I never post anything sonic related on my blog, but I adore Sonic! Not only my childhood, but it continues to pump off amazing content and games.

Fun fact: I have a cute mini sonic keychain my friend gifted me, I take it with me everywhere!!

DID YOU KNOW THAT KELLIN QUINN FROM SLEEPING WITH SIRENS WAS INVOLVED WITH THE SONIC FRONTIERS SOUNDTRACK!?!?!? AAAAAAA I LOVE SONIC GAMES MUSIC AND ITS DIVERSITY

Nobody asked, but my favorie character is Knuckles and Shadow for anyone who wants to know! (No one wants to know but I HAVE THE NEED TO SAY IT.)

anyways yes, I love Sonic, I am at arms-lenght with the fandom since i'm... well... not much into the furry stuff that goes on. But theres lots of fanmade content out there that is super cool!

IN CONCLUSION!?!?!?

I have lots and lots of other fandoms im in but i fear i will go on forever if I keep on talking.

Thank you so much for reading all the way through and please, don't ever hesitate to ask me anything related to any of these fandoms above. Hyper analizing stuff is my speciality after all:D

[maddy-ferguson]

can u expand on the byler vol2 problems

i said ask me to expand and i will and you delivered thank you for that!!! i didn't say byler vol2 problems though i said byler fandom problems post-volume 2!

i think the main thing is overcorrection. i said every major problem but i only meant the things i think of as byler tumblr trends that annoy me personally. tbh🙏 it's subjective. kind of.

i've been rereading posts from after volume 2 recently and yeah it's the "will only ever gets to be sad" to "will deserves a villain arc" kind of pipelines that you saw after volume 2 that i think are still very much happening i'm gonna talk about even though the will villain arc one died down pretty quickly. on this side of the internet anyway. some of these actually aren't volume 2 related sorry i lied i was mostly thinking about the mike stuff when i said that.

mike says i love you to el: everything always ends up being about mike somehow. i think this is the biggest one. people like the mystery and the way mike's sexuality isn't confirmed like will's is and so they analyze him more which leads to people literally rewriting history with takes like mike is more queercoded than will?😭 i get that everyone knows will is gay now but the mike focus has people thinking that will has no subtext when literally his entire storyline is full of the saddest subtext ever!!! but it's not subtext that you can choose to only read as "this boy is gay" so it's not as fun i guess😔 and it really isn't as fun. because it's mostly heartbreaking and awful lmao but yeah. just wanted to give a thumbs down to the mike is more queercoded than will take again.

mlvns say will is a whiny crybaby, bylers say going through what he's had to go through would make anyone cry just as often so will isn't even that sensitive even though he is it's literally one of the first things we learn about him lol. people imply that being sensitive is bad so often and act like will has sensitive gay kid allegations to beat when he literally doesn't like he is a sensitive gay kid😭 why do you think that's bad exactly...🎤

mike says i love you to el: 90% of people think they read everything wrong for 72-96 hours and then everyone's like oh no i get it now. byler's still endgame. overuse of the term media literacy and everyone who doesn't think or simply doesn't believe that the duffers would make byler endgame is stupid and has no media literacy. which actually comes off as very INSECURE!!!! and is frankly annoying. and obnoxious. the term media literacy needs to be taken away from byler tumblr i'm so serious.

will is not a baby just because he's gay look at these two scenes he's actually so mean and most importantly not sensitive (and then he's not even mean in the scene) and he can load a gun could a sensitive baby do that (and then he's literally 12 in the scene so like. i'm sorry but that's a baby to me😕). how dare you imply that he's sensitive, gay, and a kid. i'm kidding about the gay one because no one in this day and age is defending will by saying he's not gay but some of them might as well be because it's the qualities that made people assume he's gay that people try to say he doesn't have. the how dare you infantilize him he can load a gun one is just nonsensical because regardless of how you feel about will with a gun you're definitely meant to be like oh no this poor little kid has to defend himself all alone :( in the moment like him being a kid isn't a bad thing (??/!??,/) it makes you feel for him and is part of what makes what happens to him so awful.

mlvns accuse bylers of hating el and of being raging misogynists: elmike is born. bylers start saying that el will actually be thrilled by the match and might actually set up the guy she spent the first two and a half years of her life out of the lab fixated on who's been her boyfriend for over a year and her newfound brother. because she's so mature and over the petty drama that's a teenage love triangle. which is crazy because i DON'T believe that most bylers are as misogynistic as mlvns make us out to be like i've seen way worse which might be because...the show is actually pointing to mike being gay so it's not made up and no one needs to give el a thousand flaws to justify anything? even though people do blame her for things that i don't know if she should be blamed for but whatever that's a different discussion. i was saying: it's crazy because while i don't think bylers are all awful misogynistic el haters...the girl being so happy and out of the way and not being given the space to feel anything about her (gay) boyfriend not being in love with her is sooo new age 2010s mlm fandom sexism. let el have emotions about her breakup with her gay boyfriend who was the first person she bonded with (who didn't die immediately) after escaping the lab who lied to her about falling in love with her at first sight 2k25‼️

everything about babygirl mike and buff byers? let's not get into the whole buff byers debate i hate it with a passion. but it's like. people want mike to be taken down a peg. mike says i love you to el with will's sad little face in the background and people want mike to have to beg for forgiveness. which i get because as i was saying the other day, "i feel like my life started 24 hours after you were taken to the upside down and were traumatized forever because i met this girl who's replaced you in every way that matters, will" is hard to get over. but idk. people are so weird about mike being lame and loving will and about will barely caring about him in return and about the loserification of mike wheeler because yes mike is a loser but only in the sense that the whole party is!!! and that's something that gets lost when he's made to be below them and below will specifically because people feel like he has all the power in the relationship right now and will's at his mercy. which is something they don't like. like it's okay they're both miserable actually. rejoice! post-volume 2 mike needs to have fallen first and he needs to have fallen harder because if the only thing will gets at the end of everything is a boyfriend who loves him only as much as will loves him it's not good enough even though that's all he's not letting himself hope he'll ever have.

[scarletcitrus]

pagan min as a dragon.............this idea has been in my head for so long i’ve got like prototype pagan dragons and shit but this is my final design for him

if you want to see me go in-depth about him for reasons that are related to mental illness (i have it and it is his fault) there is more :)

okay so. i’m going to explain his entire design since it makes me happy and i’m going to start with the colors

obviously he’s super flashy and extravagant in canon so i couldn’t just Not let that cross over here. i tried to make him look like a living rainbow without actually making him a rainbow BUT i do have my reasons for each of the colors.

the golden orange-y and yellow parts are obviously, well, to represent gold and the fact that he is ummmmmmm Technically royalty despite stealing the throne? the combination of blue on gold is relative to the golden path and how he and ishwari were a thing yada yada . red is for the primary color his army wears and for lakshmana because her whole shrine is decked out in the color red and pink is for his lovely suit:)

...i couldn’t make it that vibrant pink his suit actually is or it wouldn’t have fit as well into the rest of the colors. also. all the colors are taken off the rakshasa pagan thingy but i gave them meaning to make it fancier ++++ it wasn’t my intention but the way his colors fade into each other reminds me of all the colorful ?dust (i don’t know what it is. is it just powder) in far cry 4 so that makes me happy

speaking of rakshasa pagan, the other parts of his design are very much based off of it. specifically, the bird one in shangri-la. i included the way pagan’s rakshasa face looks as best as i could but the rest of the little intricate details i all sponged off of the bird, like the armor and the crown and the huge talons. the crown i felt especially needed to be included if nothing else bc well. y’know LMAO

the vaguely peacock-looking feathers are because that seems to be his motif for himself and his army and kyrat or whatever tf i don’t really know. all i know is i see peacocks associated with him and BAM he gets some pretty feathers

p.s. ik the pose is weird in that image let’s all hold hands and pretend that he’s climbing down from something

okay bear with me . the wing size might be inconsistent but shhh don’t look at that it isn’t there also thanks to tumblr for maybe tanking the quality of these (we’ll see) . ANYWAY

he gets multiple limbs because of the golden statues (or statue singular? is there just one? i haven’t played it but god i want to) that are in his dlc and it gives me another reason to stretch the definition of “dragon” which is always super fun for me :)

his face is mostly immobile aside from being able to blink and breathe and close/open his mouth but it’s like his jaw is on hinges with the way it can only move up and down (and stiffly) because i want it to really feel like he’s got a mask on or something. like if you look at the rakshasa bird its face isn’t all that. mobile. it is made of some kind of metal i think and i tried to mimic that effect + the idea of his mask in the dlc

another p.s.! let’s all keep holding hands and pretending . this time he’s landing after flying. he doesn’t normally stand on two feet

his wings are heavy to the point that his front legs can’t really support him properly sometimes even though he’s got two pairs, so he often uses his wings as support to walk like how wyverns do. he feels like it’s inconvenient because he doesn’t want to get his feathers dirty and without a beak/easy way to close his mouth it’s annoying for him to preen them but that’s just an L he has to take

and this is just him flying 4 literally no reason. i struggle drawing animals/beings that have wings in flight (and also i struggle with the tucked-in legs that come with those) so i wanted to see if i could. i think it turned out okay? maybe

i hope this made sense and that i wasn’t totally incoherent about this! thank you for reading (if you did) (and perhaps expect more dragons... i’m a big fan of them lol)

[emilyartstudio-s]

Anny tips on tumblr posting im new to the platform and want people to see my art

Disclaimer: It is 100% okay to want attention on your work and to get people to like what you're making but remember to naturally not care about numbers because that is how you will loose your haPPINESS OF POSTING THE ART IN THE FIRST PLACE.. I recommend just posting and not paying attention to the number of followers you lose/ earn from posting. Go ahead and look at the number of notes on each post but Tumblr makes it so easy to hide the follower number away from you so just pretend it isn't there and just post whatever the heck you want!

TAGGING: So i heard a long time ago that tumblr only really counts the first five tags in your tagging bellow. If this is true; you'll want to tag the main important ones first. I usually go with (If it's sp related) South park, Any characters featured in it (Ship names if you think it appeals to that group since i personally love seeing random interactions in my ship tag art from others!!, stuff like that!!

Ship art honestly goes a long way lmao! I entered this fandom to just draw silly little comics from other media that i found funny but then i slowly started to show what my fave ships are from and people noticed and walked into MY TRAp. That's right here's another silly friendship comic instead >:)

SILLY COMICS ARE GREAT TBH!! People love laughing!!! tbh funny comics gets so much attention because people need to sit and read what you've done! :D Literally make a shit post on tik tok and everyone goes crazy;;; But you gotta like the outcome. It's got to be something that resonate with you even if it's a dumb comic lmao;;; I usually draw shit posts for myself when I'm feeling super down and then i just post it just in case someone else is having a shitty time;;;

Don't lose your authenticity and remember that other things play in the role as to why you feel like you're not growing in this fandom!

Examples include; tumblr isn't the roaring place it used to be now that most have moved on to tik tok or twitter. The number of followers you get don't mean anything to the ratio of the notes you receive. You can have 2,000 followers but get only like 5 notes because people aren't on/ are busy/ left a thousand years ago/ ect. so it's NEVER YOU <3!!!! Keep in mind of posting times! (look up posting times in 2022!!) I usually go for 5 pm Central time but 2 and 4 work great too!!

Don't be afraid to repost your own art again to meet that because omg if no one else will why not you???

and REMEBER to always be kind.

[old-lorarri]

─ paper rings . . . ❨ send me a description of yourself + a fandom and gender preference, and i’ll ship you with a character. ❩

i couldn't miss out a good time! i had this previously done but it would be interesting to know who i'd match with! i copy pasted but i added some more that might help impact the results. expect me to come around for another if i may? maybe the next day or next week.

fandom: formula one

info abt me: female & prefers men!

my big three is: leo-gemini-pisces!

i am quite an adaptable individual, love sunsets, stargazing, animals and pets & divination or anything related to spirituality.

not quite fond of social media but i really love interacting with people whom i share interests with here in tumblr! lately, i am really trying to build friendships amongst f1 writers and even readers too.

i heavily value my private life and prefer not to tell people about my personal next step in life (preferring not to share private information unless i feel comfortable) and i don't post much in my social media accounts but i have an instagram solely for posting my well curated portraits with poems as captions.

i also love psychology, deep talks about life or anything very reflective, tell me a situation that had been bothering you and i will make you reflect and tell about yourself. (this scares some people because they always say i could read them like an open book)

having a lot of hobbies and interests (i couldn't stay still between one thing [e.g. i could love making music this week, next week i'd be into arts]). right now i am into writing fics and serving the people some entertainment lmao but i have to stop because for some reason my reach is not reaching idk what to do to alleviate that. i have a keen eye for detail and quite a perfectionist — selective even.

i have a small circle of friends in real life. they are the ones who i can trust my life with. i do believe that quality is better than quantity. but building new connections helps me discover about people more and reflect about life.

my talents are diverse mainly because in my country being an all out performer is a thing. schools were literally built here for you to show and perform like beyoncé or sorts to earn grades. singing while playing an instrument, dancing, acting, writing, you name it i could give it a go. i am a theater kid so i think it impacted developing these talents, they're very enjoyable regardless. 100% not picky with music either, music kind of reflects a person's soul. roadtrips are nice and they're quality time. that's how you also know which friend of yours is only there for clout and the ones who are there because they look forward to a journey of sharing the same space with another.

clubbing is not my thing. i am not fond of smoking or drinking alcohol. I AM HEAVILY TURNED OFF BY VICES but i don't mind an occasional wine for formal events. if you put me inside a club, expect me to sit down on a corner and watch everyone. i tend to attract men easily (i am not bragging but it's hard rlly) and i do believe clubs are not the best place to attract guys sorry •́⁠ ⁠ ⁠‿⁠ ⁠,⁠•̀ if you'd invite me to a party, we can have picnics or a dinner at your home or somewhere. i couldn't handle clubs, 100% would dip if someone say clubs or bars. they're too overwhelming.

i was raised in a quite conservative household so i preferably wear clothing that do not show much skin. i love statement outfits and prefer to make my own clothes or customize clothes rather than buying high-end branded clothing. my wardrobe is quite diverse, i can have masculine and feminine outfits. styles from fairycore, 50s, 80s, 90s wear, autumn wear, formal wear and officewear. i have gowns too! at this point i can build a boutique and often get teased about it by people in my circle💀 i grew up with relatives who doesn't smoke and only drink on occasion.

my love language (receiving) is acts of service and receiving gifts. my love language (giving) is acts of service and quality time / words of affirmation. i love solving people's problems and give them cheat codes in life hahahaha

idk if this would help but i have a stale lovelife, if i happen to put myself out there there there will always be a lot of guys wanting to pursue me ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ i pull away immediately if this starts to happen because it drains me so much. i would then focus into my career and go into hermit mode again, the one who stays in my life and wait for me to regain my energy is what i think, is meant for me. tbh, i need someone who is patient and understanding towards me or it's going to be disaster lmfao ฅ[⁠ᓀ´⁠ ▾ `⁠ᓂ⁠]ฅ

LEWIS HAMILTON

very private person, both of you like to keep it that way especially when it comes to you relationship

both of you have very deep conversations about life each other certain topics and just life in general

you both love to reflect on stuff and help each other get stuff of your chest

you tend to do this while you cuddling with chill music in the background

lewis supports you though all of your different hobbie phases

love that your so open to trying new things

you both have a tight inner circle and you both value quality over quantity

the two of you def recorded a song together

you both hold fashion shows for each other after a massive shop

both of your love languages are is acts of serves

which sometimes turns into a funny competition of who can out do the other

is always patient and understanding when it comes to you

[fallingsunflower]

My thoughts on Harry's break part 2/2

I want to share some of my thoughts that I've kept bottled up over the past couple of years but it seems pertinent to share them now.

For those who don't know - hi, I'm Sunny. I run this blog but I also have a background in psychology. I have 2 degrees, have worked in several schools and a psychiatric hospital, and have done extensive research in multiple areas of psychology that overlap with what I'm about to outline.

Celebrities aren't my area of expertise. This is just an educated opinion.

You can read my opinion on what Harry's been up to here. I outlined it like that because I wanted to show that Harry's been on the move for a reallllly long time. He keeps busy and busy and while although I think a break is necessary, I don't think it's as simple as that.

Love On Tour consisted of 2 eras - Fine Line and Harry's House - mashed into about 5 years. I think the emotional ending to Love On Tour was partially due to Harry finally saying goodbye to these eras. It was probably mentally exhausting for him to cope with that. In my opinion, the song he composed for the last show wasn't a goodbye song but rather a thank you song to express what words cannot (I often say Harry isn't very good at words). So I think he wanted to express himself via song to end a very good and emotional time in his life.

This was also only Harry's SECOND world tour. I know it felt like a lifetime but he only did Love On Tour and Live On Tour. So when he says it was the time of his life and he'll never forget it, that's because it was LITERALLY HIS SECOND SOLO TOUR. Both his tours were great but I'm sure this one was probably more enjoyable for him. He seemed to fall into a groove and grew in popularity and success. He was selling out stadiums and I think he realized he was creating something incredibly good - such as the good part of the fandom that came together like a family. I think he felt loved and appreciated.

Piggy-backing off of that into more of a psychological route, there's a lot that happens when an artist is on tour. They're surrounded by people 24/7. They have people telling them every day how much they love them. They are also doing something that they love to do. Harry specifically said performing is his favorite thing in the world to do.

So when the lights go down and the tour ends and the artist goes home, it's probably quiet. It's something we struggle to relate to. There are no more people around. There's no more of that extreme love. There's a pause in doing something really enjoyable.

I suspect it's depressing and maybe even a little bit scary. I don't think Harry likes being alone. I think he likes to be busy, even though I think a break will do him good. I just hope he has a good support system. A lot of artists struggle with the in-between time. I won't go into details but I've always worried a little bit about it.

With all that being said, I think it was just plain old emotionally hard for Harry to leave that stage. I think he longs to go back even though it was tiring because sometimes staying busy is better than being left alone to your own thoughts. So I think we're seeing a lot of that aftermath.

Now idk if Harry is going to be taking an extended break. He COULD be but I really just think it was an emotional end for him. I don't think he's retiring or will be gone for a suuuuper long time. I'm also not sure what his Marvel plans look like but I just can't see him putting music on the back burner. He said over and over on LOT that music is his favorite part of his job. Rumors of his retirement have been circulating for months.

This was a pretty long post to explain something but I think it's a complicated subject and people are taking it in multiple extremes. It's also hard to have a convo on Tumblr lmao I prefer in-person but obviously that's not possible (how fun would that be though LMAO)

[e77y]

relating to that vent, i getchu so bad. i feel like in general, the internet might worsen compulsions & obsession within ocd + etc. i have a similar feeling (wouldnt say identical cause i know u from tumblr n yaknow yaknow) that tells me everything i do needs to be 100% morally correct or [insert awful things] will happen to me or someone i love. and this is easier to deal with when you're offline, because there's a limit on the people that can get mad at you. half of the world won't get mad at you because only 0.00001% (or whatever) of the world knows you, yaknow. on the net, it feels like everyone who has an account knows you. your brain telly you anyone who has an account on here might see what you posted & they might be mad at you & they might make a callout post or whatever. even though they don't know you. which is a terrifying thought for many. i dont think youre alone in this, genuinely. and i feel it can be improved. some stuff that's helped me: - making separate accounts w private stuff (doesnt rly work on tumblr but like a private account on insta & etc etc) - rationalising thoughts (an example of this would be thinking: is it really likely many people will agree with someone being mad at me? or: how many people actually do see my posts? is that proportional to the amount of followers i have) - and talking ab it w friends. genuinely, the communication + processing of these thoughts & feelings is soo helpful. sending u soo much love <3 if u wanna chat a bit ab it you can dm me :) (ask can be published or responded 2 privately, whatever u prefer!)

Thank you so much for this message omg :’) ❤️❤️❤️❤️ So thoughtful. This made me tear up a little haha. I’m posting it here so I can look back at it later; hopefully that’s okay.

I’m really glad to hear other people feel the same way/have the same worry… like logically I know that it’s something a lot of people worry about, but idk; my brain has a way of convincing me I am the only person in the world who has done anything ‘bad’ ever LMAOO. So this was really nice to hear

Also I’m a very talkative person! Like I’m definitely an introvert, but I do like to talk about myself and my interests and my feelings etc. Especially when I have a forum (cough Tumblr) to post into the void 😭😭 So I guess that’s part of my issue; IRL, there are less people to be upset if I do/say something ‘bad’, and most of them are my close friends and know I don’t have bad intentions. But online, I walk on eggshells bc 1) strangers online DON’T know my intentions and 2) I just think my mutuals are really cool lol. So I don’t want to do/say anything ‘bad’ or even embarrassing in their presence yk? And online, their ‘presence’ comprises literally all the time w everything I post

I should probably make a more private account 😅 This one is kind of that (just bc it has far fewer followers than my other blog), and I have one on Instagram with like two people following it that I haven’t touched in a while, sooo maybe I will go back to that for more personal vents and whatnot 🫡 I try not to post anything TOO personal on Tumblr, anyway. I just also really like creating fan content, which sort of inherently puts me in a public space even if I don’t WANT to have an ‘audience’ (regardless of how small that audience is; ik there are people who look up to my writing, and that puts a lot of extra pressure on me, but I don’t want to stop writing, either…. Agh)

Idk this is probably overly personal and also very disjointed bc I just finished writing a 1,800 word essay and my brain is mush lol. I’m just sort of reiterating everything you said. Sorry for making you read all this lmao 😭🙏 But thank you for the kind words, seriously ❤️ I really really appreciate it :’D !!!!!!!