#literally none of it felt real

[spicycoffeebean]

If you don't want to answer that's COMPLETELY fine and you can ignore this entirely, but if your comfort zone permits: I happened across your tag and am. curious how someone could use reddit to try and get someone to detransition. Like, do you mean she made a post about it to get people agreeing with her or??

Hi Anon! I'll be honest and say I'm glad somebody took notice enough to actually ask. Because I still refuse to believe it happened.

No! She did not make a Reddit post. She just sent me several posts from r/detrans to get me to detransition.

More below the cut! Idk how long this will be, but cw for transphobia and all around shitty/questionable behavior

For those who don't know (I can't track down the post, but I commented in tags) my own mother (60) has been very actively against my transition (ftm) since I began taking testosterone in November 2021(I have been openly trans and using he/him prns since 2018, so it's not like any of this was "new" information to her) On top of blatant misinformation, my mom tried to source REDDIT, the detransitioner's subreddit to prove that yes, people do detransition. Never once denied her that. My issue here is that no, she did not make a post, she was ~browsing~ the detransitioner subreddit r/detrans to push me to detransition. She was "sourcing" it (I wanna say she said in the same conversation that she doesn't trust sites that have LGBTQ+ flags despite the statistics being very real and very present. I'm an analytics/statistics student.)

I have a million issues with this, but very simply, she is using people's struggles and real trauma to fuel a transphobic agenda to get me to detransition (I was so much happier when I chose to be openly trans let alone when I actually started T last year.) If you actually read the subreddit, 99% of those stories are OP saying "Transitioning did not work for me" but not once do they denounce transitioning. They make it clear that their experiences with it did not work out.

“I talk to detransitioners all of the time” she said “Why don’t you talk to a real trans person?” I asked her “Because I know their story.” is what she said word for word Bitch I’m trans and I don’t know trans people’s stories. I just am trans?? I made it super easy for her. Talk to a doctor or a real trans person. She makes any excuse to NOT DO THIS. A cisgender doctor in California will tell you that you are out right wrong and doing more harm than any good you might see from it.

Less than 1% of people detransition, and the majority of those who detransition ARE STILL UNHAPPY. Even then a handful of people detransition because of society, family, or something simple as healthcare. People are denied healthcare because doctors don't want to provide basic care to a transgender person. (I live in the US where this practice would be illegal) My mother acts like I myself deny that people detransition while she literally won't acknowledge WHY people detransition at all. LGBT clinics are apparently shutting down in the UK, Norway, Sweden etc. Yeah cool cisgender people are losing healthcare too. But apparently that doesn't matter. My brother's(cis) bisexual and he could be denied care if he lived in such a place. I don't think she'd take kindly to that, knowing she was the most supportive when my brother came out well over 10 years ago.

I do not want my story or trauma to be used as fuel for a fire to hurt somebody else. I doubt any of these detransitioners would be happy knowing this either. Their stories are not for my mother to tell

anyway she sends me to college(to study analytics/statistics lol??) and insists I'm brainwashed and need an autism diagnosis(YES, SHE ASKED ME 3 TIMES TO GET ONE. NO I JUST HAVE ADHD. I ASKED DOCTORS FOR 5 YEARS ABT IT LOL)

She's just in denial she spent 1 million usd and 2 years of paperwork on a China doll because "[She] didn't want to try for another son" I was told this my entire childhood and it's haunting me almost every day now.

That's the super dumbed-down version of that Reddit comment. Let alone EVERYTHING ELSE she put me through the last 14 months.

TLDR; She did not make a post to get people to agree with her, she was just taking people's stories and struggles to fuel a hate agenda detransitioners themselves do not agree with (she cannot read.)

[puppyeared]

i think the reason why im so drawn to spirit tracks and pkmn scarvi is that having the legendary/princess as a companion rather than a goal that marks the games completion makes me feel satisfied the way i would after helping a friend

my brother always teases me about how I still havent finished botw after almost 7 years bc "id rather be out picking flowers" which i wont say is untrue. and yes i know Zeldas been holding off ganon for 100 years, yes i can get some sort of idea what her relationship with link was like by recalling memories and going through her diary. ive always loved botw for its unique storytelling and setting which makes it stand out, because it lets you get to know who you're saving.

but because theyre memories, it only works if theres something for the player to investigate that already happened. its retroactive (but effective nonetheless)

on the other hand, spirit tracks does something similar but instead of having the player try to piece together memories and interpret them as a spectator, you actually have an opportunity to get to know zelda yourself by talking to her and working together. besides making it a gameplay mechanic, giving the player control over how they interact with zelda makes it so much more personable.

and I find that making the goal feel personal instead of an obligation gives me more of a reason to work towards it. I know what kind of person botw zelda was but as the player, shes still very much a stranger to me. but spirit tracks zelda? thats my friend!!!! she invited me to go to the beach after we get her body back!!! i dont want to whip her to make her move faster thats mean :(

you know how hostage negotiators are trained to introduce themselves and get to know the person theyre negotiating with because its harder to hurt someone when you know what their favorite food is? its kinda like that, because it feels like im helping a friend than being told or led to do smth

and although i havent played scarvi myself, i feel an attachment to koraidon and miraidon even just watching playthrough clips because its like!! thats my weird scaly dog!! it loves sandwiches and we're friends!!! you know!!!!!!

[semishid]

It’s not funny anymore

[hella1975]

me: yeah i didn't project too badly onto taob haha *sees a quote from taob randomly on a tiktok webweave about girlhood*

[hexslvt]

.

[magstorrn]

about to leave a scathing review for a historical fiction book on goodreads (felt so strongly about it i made an account for the first time) then chickening out once i realised i'd put down my full name and i dont want to offend the author TOO much in case we end up working in the same field as historians

[lenakluthor]

really close to closing my ask box bc i’ve gotten an influx of asks asking for money and for me to reblog their posts that just feel so scammy to me while simultaneously making me feel like an asshole for not helping on the off chance they’re legit and i’m NOT about to let that ruin my peace but also, i fucking love when people send me asks so… we are at an impasse

[foureyes802]

btw im finally playing portal 2 for myself. probably gonna finish it tomorrow. whoever designed the puzzle for 8-16 im killing with hammers

[rippedstitches]

My stress dreams have been so bad I’m sick of this

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

still thinking bout that ghosts finale and like look regardless whether you liked it or not, i think you have to agree that it was really fucking DUMB that alison and mike decided to move when they had a new born BABY lol

having a baby is already a stressful situation, and then you throw in The most stressful thing (moving house) into the mix i'm just like ????? that's so dumb that's so DUMB lol

[yuribalisms]

Essentially what it is all boiling down to is I have fully realized I am bad at being a person, that will always be true, and I don’t know how to handle that

[mintchochipkookie]

kim namjoon for world president when

[haechannabelle]

ok personal venting in the tags time. giving u my TMI like stray kids said

[emeryleewho]

I used to work for a trade book reviewer where I got paid to review people's books, and one of the rules of that review company is one that I think is just super useful to media analysis as a whole, and that is, we were told never to critique media for what it didn't do but only for what it did.

So, for instance, I couldn't say "this book didn't give its characters strong agency or goals". I instead had to say, "the characters in this book acted in ways that often felt misaligned with their characterization as if they were being pulled by the plot."

I think this is really important because a lot of "critiques" people give, if subverted to address what the book does instead of what it doesn't do, actually read pretty nonsensical. For instance, "none of the characters were unique" becomes "all of the characters read like other characters that exist in other media", which like... okay? That's not really a critique. It's just how fiction works. Or "none of the characters were likeable" becomes "all of the characters, at some point or another, did things that I found disagreeable or annoying" which is literally how every book works?

It also keeps you from holding a book to a standard it never sought to meet. "The world building in this book simply wasn't complex enough" becomes "The world building in this book was very simple", which, yes, good, that can actually be a good thing. Many books aspire to this. It's not actually a negative critique. Or "The stakes weren't very high and the climax didn't really offer any major plot twists or turns" becomes "The stakes were low and and the ending was quite predictable", which, if this is a cute romcom is exactly what I'm looking for.

Not to mention, I think this really helps to deconstruct a lot of the biases we carry into fiction. Characters not having strong agency isn't inherently bad. Characters who react to their surroundings can make a good story, so saying "the characters didn't have enough agency" is kind of weak, but when you flip it to say "the characters acted misaligned from their characterization" we can now see that the *real* problem here isn't that they lacked agency but that this lack of agency is inconsistent with the type of character that they are. a character this strong-willed *should* have more agency even if a weak-willed character might not.

So it's just a really simple way of framing the way I critique books that I think has really helped to show the difference between "this book is bad" and "this book didn't meet my personal preferences", but also, as someone talking about books, I think it helps give other people a clearer idea of what the book actually looks like so they can decide for themselves if it's worth their time.

Update: This is literally just a thought exercise to help you be more intentional with how you critique media. I'm not enforcing this as some divine rule that must be followed any time you have an opinion on fiction, and I'm definitely not saying that you have to structure every single sentence in a review to contain zero negative phrases. I'm just saying that I repurposed a rule we had at that specific reviewer to be a helpful tool to check myself when writing critiques now. If you don't want to use the tool, literally no one (especially not me) can or wants to force you to use it. As with all advice, it is a totally reasonable and normal thing to not have use for every piece of it that exists from random strangers on the internet. Use it to whatever extent it helps you or not at all.

[lesbianpikachu]

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[lolitakirstein]

CW:Implied smut, pregnancy, Toji being feral for you

Thinking about how Toji loves when your pregnant.

He loves watching your belly grow weekly, constantly comparing it to the week before. Your small little bump in the first trimester drives him wild. “I just look fat” you complain anytime he’d come up behind you and rub on your little pooch that had formed, not yet a solid form distinguishable underneath. “No baby it’s much different, you look so adorable, “ he’d softly pinch the skin, causing you to squeal. Your breast started growing rapidly as you neared your delivery date, and toji adored how swollen they were becoming even though you were still complaining about your changing body “None of my bras fit, they’re so heavy and sore,” “I know baby,” he’d coo at night while he palmed your tender breast to relieve the aches. “But you’re still so sexy. Your perfect tits swollen with milk to feed our baby. Fuck you’re gonna be a pretty mama.” You feared your changing body would make Toji less attracted to you. “Not at all baby, i think this is the most beautiful you’ve ever looked. All knocked up with my child,” he'd say from the couch as he watched you strolling around the house-more like waddling, in nothing but a large tshirt and panties.  “Real eloquent, Toji,” you roll your eyes.  The final weeks and days of your pregnancy were rough. Your stomach distended so big you worried if you breathed too heavily you would pop.  “Look at youuuuuu,” Toji would sigh, getting on his knees infront of you to kiss and rub your sore belly. “Our little guys gonna be big like his daddy.” Sure enough, your little bundle of joy was in fact a large, bouncing 9lb baby boy. And sure enough, Toji was ready get you pregnant again as he watched you breastfeeding your little creation in the rocking chair.  “God that’s about the most beautiful sight i’ve ever seen,” he breathed while laying in the floor of the nursery, absolutely swooning over you and your child. “Let’s have another.” “Toji! I just gave birth,” you half laugh half shout.  “Yeah?” he shrugged, reaching for your feet and massaging your achey ankles. “You’d look heavenly feeding my child while full of my other one” You playfully kicked him in the chest.

Honestly, Toji would keep you pregnant 24/7/365 if he could. The pride he felt seeing you busting with his child. How your skin glowed from the hormones. Even how your nipples would darken and enlarge, leaking with milk near feeding time- hell he even loved rubbing nipple cream on your sore nipples and breast, always trying to soothe you. 

And sure enough, not even a year after the birth of your child, Toji smirked as you showed him the 2 faint lines. “Mmmmm, get to see my baby all big again, fertile little mama.” You only half teased about getting him “fixed”, because you secretly loved being pregnant as well and watching the literal heart eyes pulse in his eyes. The massages were also a plus