#lol that awkward moment you realize there's a plot hole

[perspective-series]

Pet Perspective (5/19)

By: @arc852 and @hiddendreamer67

Warnings: Collars, pain, shocking

First Chapter || Previous Chapter || Next Chapter

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 Patton brought Logan up the stairs but didn’t stop at his room. Instead, he went straight to his bathroom next to it. He set Logan down on the counter and grinned at him. “Alright, I think it would be good for you to take a quick shower first before we head out. The sink should be fine until we can buy you a tiny shower.”

Logan had never used anything besides a tiny shower before. “How does it work?”

 “I’ll just turn the faucet on like this.” Patton did so. “So there isn’t too much pressure and you can go in a wash real quick with some soap I can give you.” Patton explained. He let the water run as he got up and went to snag a little piece of soap off the bar in his shower. He turned back and handed it to Logan. “There you go.”

“Are there any clean clothes?” Logan looked around, seeing none. “This exercise seems pointless if I’m redressing in the same garments.”

 “Well, no...but I could wash them for you while you’re in the shower?” Patton suggested.

Logan cringed at the suggestion. “I am particularly clean. I bathed yesterday and borrowers take several days before a second bath is required.”

 “Well...if you’re sure.” Patton said. “I can take the soap back then, we can save it for later.” He held his hand out as the other turned the water off.

Logan nodded, handing over the soap.

 Patton put the soap back and closed the cage back up, taking it back into his room and setting it back down on the desk. “Alright, well, I need to go get ready then, so I’ll be right back, okay?” Patton grabbed his clothes and headed back into his bathroom.

Logan settled in, waiting patiently as he was trained. That was one thing he was good at- patience. While, only in terms of waiting alone. Logan had very little patience for others, be they borrower or especially human.

 Patton came back fifteen minutes later, hair slightly wet and in new clothes. He dumped his old ones in a hamper, before going back over to his borrower. “Alright, so...how do you want to do this? I’m not sure if I can bring the whole cage with me while we shop.”

“Is it required I attend shopping?” Logan raised an eyebrow.

 “Well, yeah, I want you to choose what you want.” Patton answered.

“In that case… “ Logan glanced at his human’s attire. “I suppose a pocket would be optimal.”

 Patton looked down at himself and grinned. “Okay! Sounds good!” He opened the cage and once again set his hand, palm out, for Logan to climb on.

Logan tensed, but found the prospect less threatening now when he knew it would not be for long and that touch was being avoided. He was surprised his human was so accommodating. Because of this, Logan climbed onto the palm.

 Patton grinned wide, glad to see his borrower had actually done it. He was quick to bring his hand to his chest pocket, holding it open to let his borrower climb down himself.

Logan did so, finding the sensation rather odd. He had never actually been in a pocket, and it took him several minutes to scoot around and find a comfortable position.

 “How is it? Comfy?” Patton asked, opening the pocket to glance down inside it.

“It will suffice.” Logan answered, nearly losing his footing as the containment was jostled.

 “Great!” Patton got up and headed downstairs, he was met with Virgil, already all ready and holding Roman close to his chest. “Hey Virge! All ready to get going?” He asked.

 Virgil nodded but looked Patton over in confusion. “Yeah but uh, where’s your borrower?” He asked.

 “Oh!” Patton chuckled and opened his pocket a little to show his borrower off. “He’s in here!”

Logan gave a cautious wave.

“Of course he is.” Roman huffed, imagining it was quite comfortable. Then again, Roman had been in plenty of cramped pockets in his life to know they weren’t all fun and games.

 “Oh, wow, that’s actually a pretty good idea.” Virgil looked down at Roman and then at his hoodie pocket. He raised his eyebrows in a silent question.

“Well, it certainly beats dropping me on the sidewalk. What, you really expect to keep me steady all that way?” Roman raised his own eyebrows.

 “Fair point.” Virgil said with a shrug before gently depositing Roman into his pocket. He kept one hand in though, just in case. “How is that?”

“Not as messy as your room.” Came the surprised muffled reply.

 Patton couldn’t hide the chuckle at that and Virgil glared down at his pocket. “Whatever, we’re ready.”

 “Then let’s get going! No time to waste!” Patton grabbed his keys and Virgil followed him out the door. They both got into the car and Patton started it up but as soon as it started, the music started blasting at a high volume. 

Logan let out a shriek, which quickly turned high pitched as he firmly tried to press his hands to his ears and ignore the painful shock he received for raising his voice too high. His entire form began to tremble, an aftershock of soundwaves and the collar alike.

“TURN IT DOWN!” Roman gave his own shriek, unprohibited by a collar to speak his mind as he curled up with his hands to his ears. “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU BOTH?!”

 Patton scrambled to turn off the radio, sighing in relief when he was successful. “I’m so sorry! I forgot it was up that high!” Concern etched into his face, Patton took Logan out of his pocket and looked him over. “Are you okay?”

 Virgil did the same, grabbing Roman gently around the middle and bringing him up to chest level. “Are you okay?” He gently touched the side of Roman’s head.

“WHAT?” Roman shouted back, his ears still ringing. 

Logan was still shivering, his muscles tense from the sudden jolt of electricity that had traveled through his veins.

 Virgil winced. “Well, that isn’t good.”

 Patton frowned down at his borrower. The poor thing was shaking like a leaf. “Kiddo? What’s wrong?”

“I- the- reaction- “ Logan found himself unable to form a coherent sentence, instead steadying his breathing and focusing on getting his body under control.

 “Hey, hey, it’s okay.” Patton gently rubbed the borrower’s back. “I’ll make sure we leave it off from now on, okay? No more big noisy surprises.” He promised.

Logan just nodded, frightened of setting off the collar again. For once he did not mind the sensation of touch, finding comfort in the warmth as his primitive mind attempted to cope.

 As Patton continued to comfort his borrower, Virgil was still focused on Roman.

 “Is your hearing back yet?” He asked.

“A LITTLE.” Roman gave a wibbly-wobbly motion with his hand, rubbing at his ears to try to get the sensation to stop. He was aware he was still yelling but couldn’t cease.

 “Okay, you’re the one who lost their hearing, not me. You don’t have to yell.” Virgil said, wincing a little at the volume on the little guy. He was sort of impressed too, actually.

“...WHAT?” Roman tried not to smirk too much, his hearing beginning to return. It was certainly a benefit to annoy Virgil. He should do this more often.

 Virgil gave Roman a deadpanned look. “Okay, now you’re just messing with me, aren’t you?”

“I CAN’T HEAR YOU.” Roman yelled, feigning ignorance. He put his hand to his ear, which had stopped ringing. “YOU’LL HAVE TO SPEAK UP.”

 “...You’re going back in the pocket.” Virgil said, slipping Roman back into his hoodie pocket as promised.

 Patton shook his head at the two, looking down at his borrower. Who looked a bit better. “You good now? Are you ready to go?” He asked gently.

Logan nodded. He had regained control of his limbs, and was eager to retreat to the relative safety of his own pocket.

 “Okay.” Patton put the tiny back in his pocket and finally put the car into drive and took off for the store.

 They arrived ten minutes later, both humans getting out of the car. When they entered the store, Virgil brought Roman out into the open. “I’m gonna head over that way. Meet you back up front in an hour?” Virgil asked and Patton gave him a thumbs up.

 “Sounds good, kiddo!” They went their separate ways. Virgil beelining it for the clothes.

 “Alright, Roman. See anything you like?” He asked, pointing the borrower in the direction of all the tiny clothes.

Roman glanced over the large selection of clothing, mostly unimpressed. It was mostly bland, very few colors and poor imitations of human clothing. And then, Roman’s eyes landed on a bin off at the end. Roman gasped, grabbing onto Virgil’s sleeve and pointing, unable to contain his excitement. “There!”

 Virgil raised an eyebrow but then groaned as he got closer and saw what was inside. “Really? Roman you have all these normal clothes to choose from, why are you looking in the costume bin?”

“Those are boring.” Roman wrinkled his nose. Human-made borrower clothes were known for being dull and coming apart easily, not for practical use. At least something with glitter and frills would give Roman a small sense of fun. Roman kept in a moan, wanting to reach out and grab the fabrics. “You said anything, now take me to those treasures!”

 Virgil sighed, he had said that, hadn’t he. He went over and turned the box on it’s side before setting Roman down to look. “Alright, but they can’t all be from here. You have to get some regular clothes.”

“Preposterous. Ooh~!” Roman agreed to nothing, holding up a rainbow crop top that was likely a rejected part of some hippy outfit.

 Virgil just barely kept himself from face palming. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am completely serious. No, wait!” Roman gasped, grabbing up a long frilly white top that was a pirate’s undershirt.

 Virgil groaned. “Roman, look, I know these are actually made for borrowers and stuff but they might as well be doll clothes. Why would you want that?” Virgil asked.

Roman tensed for a moment, shaking off the feeling with his arms full of costume pieces. He pointed back towards the regular clothes. “Those might as well be doll clothes too, with how sturdy they are. I figure I might as well have fun with it if I’m meant to wear any of these.”

 Virgil sighed. “Fine, it’s my fault for saying you could get whatever you wanted anyway.” Virgil muttered. “Just hurry up, we only have an hour and we still need to get other things for you.”

Roman quirked an eyebrow. “Do you seriously have the gaul to tell me to hurry up? When I am in a fashionista’s paradise?”

 “...I’ve just realized how terrible an idea it was to take you shopping for clothes.” Virgil groaned, running a hand down his face.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Roman insisted, gathering up more bits and pieces here and there. “If you hadn’t taken me, you would have to put up with my moaning over whatever horrendous ‘look’ you would have chosen.”

 Virgil made a face. “Yeah...honestly though, I’m not sure which one would have been worse at this point.” They had just gotten there and he was already bored. Leaning his face on one hand, he started shifting through the box to busy himself.

“What’s so bad about this?” Roman argued. “I’m the one doing all the hard work, you know. You should be thanking me.”

 “I’ve just never been a fan of shopping for clothes. I mean, have you seen what I’m wearing?” He usually just went for what was dark and comfortable. There wasn’t much thought behind it. Speaking of, Virgil raised an eyebrow as he brought out a sleeveless leather jacket. He smirked at Roman as he held it up. “Hey Roman, I think this would be perfect for you.” He waved the jacket back and forth.

Roman paused, hating to admit that he could almost see himself wearing that. Almost. But he certainly wasn’t about to tell Virgil that, and end up with an entire wardrobe just as dark and gloomy. “Very funny, irritating emo.”

 Virgil shrugged but threw the jacket back into the pile. He checked his phone. How had they only been here for five minutes? It felt so much longer.

Roman continued to gather up various outfits, abandoning his technique of gathering them in his arms and instead piling them up off to the side as the amount grew to be more than he could feasibly carry. Seeing Virgil otherwise occupied, Roman also took the opportunity to sneak the jacket into his stash, shoving it deep into the middle so it wasn’t easily visible. 

 As Virgil finally looked back at what Roman had found, his eyes widened at the size of the pile that had grown. Oh, that was definitely going to cost him. “Okay, I think we’re done for now.” He quickly scooped Roman up with one hand before scooping up the clothes with another. He through them in a nearby hand basket before taking said hand basket with him.

“How come?” Roman asked, playing innocent. He may have thrown a few items on just for the heck of it at the end. After all, it wasn’t like he had to pay for it.

 “I think this,” He held the basket up. “Is more than enough clothes. Now come on, we still have to get you a collar and an enclosure.” Virgil headed over towards the collars first, figuring it would be easy to get out of the way.

At the mention of the collar, Roman’s mood dropped significantly. In all the hype he had almost forgotten that particular accessory, and his neck was already chafing in memory. Not to mention, any gaudy tag was certain to clash with all the clothes he had painstakingly chosen.

 Virgil looked at all the colors with a hum. “What color do you want?” Virgil asked Roman, letting him look at the selection.

“...none of them?” Roman tried, giving Virgil a hesitant smile.

 “Nice try but you have to have one. Look, if you don’t care I’ll just get you a black one.” He started to reach for it.

“No!” Roman all but screeched, not wanting that dark leather permanently around his neck. 

 Virgil stopped and pulled his arm back. “Well, then pick one.”

Roman bit his lip, evaluating his choices. Unlike his clothing, Roman didn’t want a frilly collar. It would only get in his way and serve as a constant reminder of his imprisonment. No, what Roman needed was something slim and subtle, that would stay out of his way and hopefully be able to remove. 

“...that one.” Roman sighed, pointing dejectedly at a thin red collar hanging near the bottom.

 Virgil grabbed the one Roman pointed at, looking it over. “Okay, yeah, looks good. We’ll get you a tag made once we check out.” He put it into the basket. “Alright, now onto the enclosures.”

 He went to the next isle, looking at the displays they had. The furniture and such was below each display. “Alright, Roman. What are you thinking?”

“Oh, I’m thinking we have quite enough, I don’t want you to have to spend all that money on an enclosure…” Roman pretended to look upset at the notion.

 “Roman, it really is no problem. I know I complained a bit but Pat and I saved up specifically for this, so go ahead and choose whatever you want.” He motioned back over to the wall.

“Well, in that case,” Roman’s features failed to hide a mischievous grin, the borrower pointing eagerly at the top shelf. There sat an ornate structure, designed to look like a true doll, er, borrower, mansion, complete with a gold paint finish and advertised swimming pool.

 “...Okay, I officially regret everything.” He looked down at Roman. “Please pick something cheaper?” He asked.

“I’m sorry, except I’m not!” Roman pointed earnestly at it again. “You said ‘whatever I want’. You were very clear about your intentions.”

 “Okay, well not even a second ago you didn’t even want one. I know you’re just choosing it to get at me.” Virgil said, glaring at the borrower slightly.

“I would never.” Roman put a hand to his heart. “I never said I didn’t want one, I only expressed concern over your wallet, which you were quick to wave off. My heart’s been set on that one ever since i laid eyes on it and I cannot be swayed.”

 Virgil groaned. He knew he didn’t have to get it for Roman. But he also wanted Roman to like him and if that meant getting a-he looked at the price tag and his eyes widened-very expensive enclosure then...he supposed his wallet would just have to forgive him. “Fine, alright.”

 He waved someone down to ask for it and they told him it would be waiting up front for him. He thanked the man and then turned back to the furniture. “You are so spoiled.”

Roman just looked quite pleased with himself.

 Virgil sighed. “Just pick some furniture already.”

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 299: No Chains Left

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “and then AFO broke out all of the inmates from six other prisons and took a nap. well anyways, here’s the hospital angst.” Kacchan woke up two days later and was all, “WAIT BUT HOW ARE DEKU AND TODOROKI AND ALL OF THE OTHER CHARACTERS EXCEPT IIDA DOING” and then we cut to Shouto’s room where the other U.A. kids were sitting around being Mutually Traumatized and giving each other moral support and such. Everyone was alll, “...”, and then the rest of the Todofam showed up, INCLUDING POSSIBLY REI?! which, omg. The chapter ended with Kacchan STOMPING THROUGH THE HALLS all “WHADDYA MEAN DEKU HASN’T WOKEN UP YET”, dragging along Satou and Mineta behind him, fueled by the power of ALL OF THE FUCKS HE NOW GIVES. He gives so many fucks now you guys. This boy cares so much he can probably deduct it on his taxes.

Today on BnHA: SPEAKING OF PEOPLE WHO GIVE A LOT OF FUCKS, the story cuts abruptly to Hawks, freshly recovering from his near-death experience, and pondering the threads that have weaved the tapestry of his life and led him to this moment. Basically he grew up in poverty with his Jerk Dad and Jerk Mom until his dad got arrested one day and his mom sent him off to go Find Money Or Something, and so he rescued a busload of people and found himself a new career. Back in the present day, Hawks and Jeanist ride around town in Jeanist’s Jamborghini having awkward encounters with civilians in a country on the brink of social collapse, and visiting Hawks’s mother’s home. Hawks is all “I know from an outsider’s perspective it must look like my life currently sucks, but now that the HPSC is gone, my public image is shot, and my parents are finally out of my life, I’m actually feeling SURPRISINGLY GOOD.” Anyway so he’s gonna go meet up with Endeavor now, and p.s. this chapter was fucking fantastic though, damn.

oh my god?? is this Hawks narration?? something about him growing up watching the heroes on TV and thinking of them as fictional characters

okay I scrolled down a little bit more to see the rest of that “Keigo” panel, and wow

this is basically a shed. poor boy definitely grew up rough. let me tell you guys, I came in here ready for some BakuDeku shenanigans; I was not prepared for Hawks Flashback Angst. I AM HERE FOR IT, but also wow I gotta brace myself now lol

HELLO MISTER HAWKS’S JERK DAD, SIR

BnHA sure does have an array of Jerk Dads, doesn’t it. makes me appreciate characters like Masaru and JirouDad all the more for bucking the trend

anyway. so Horikoshi, you really thought that one itty bitty chapter of hospital catharsis would be enough to calm us all before you went right back to showing us child abuse huh. my god man can we rest

BABY HAWKS

swear to god this kid can’t be more than five or six, and yet he has this completely blank look on his face even with his dad looming over him being all threatening and shit. like he’s shut down his emotions to protect himself. imagine what has to happen to a child for him to have learned this at such a young age. fuck

AND MEANWHILE THIS GUY

don’t mingle with humans?? not “other” humans, just humans?? what is this implying here?? and also holy shit Hawks definitely didn’t inherit his looks from his dad orz

then again he doesn’t really bear much of a resemblance to his strung-out mom here either

omg omg omg. and this child is basically trapped here in this environment with these two people. this explains a SHITLOAD about Hawks’s personality though you guys. his ability to completely separate his real thoughts from the face he presents to the outside world. his pragmatic approach to analyzing and solving problems. his layers of emotional walls. turns out almost none of that came from the HPSC training -- that was all learned hands-on in his own personal do-or-die survival nightmare childhood!! oh, boy

and small wonder then that he latched on to Endeavor so strongly if he really is the one who brought down his dad and inadvertently saved him from this. also, just putting this out there, I know people are always talking about him and Dabi being foils, and I think it’s very interesting how Touya grew up in a household where he saw firsthand the dark side of hero society, and so ended up becoming a villain in order to bring it down. whereas young Keigo had almost the exact opposite experience, growing up experiencing the dark side of villain society and becoming a hero in order to bring about a world where no one else has to experience that. just. both of them are so determined not to become their fathers. some interesting parallels there

so Hawks was sort of an accident after his parents had “thanks for helping me not get caught after I killed that guy” sex, and now this little boy is growing up in squalor and being beaten by his father for things like Sitting In The Wrong Out-Of-The-Way Corner Trying Not To Be A Bother To Anybody. holy fuck. this is so rough to read through you guys

wait so does Jerk Dad have a an eyeball manipulation quirk?? because he doesn’t have the wings like his son, but wth are these things??

this presumably also means that Keigo has never been to school or anything either. he basically doesn’t exist. he thinks heroes are fictional characters, he doesn’t realize that they’re real people. these are people who could help him if he could escape and find them, but he doesn’t know, and they don’t know about him

OH MY GOD HE’S JUST SITTING IN HIS CORNER HUGGLING HIS ENDEAVOR PLUSH OH MY GOD

how could this child possibly have an anti-fandom when he’s done NOTHING WRONG HIS ENTIRE LIFE. huh. just explain that to me. lol I mean I’m not looking to pick a fight with anyone, but also, MAYBE I AM, idk?? this kid has gotten me all riled up lmao

anyways, Protect Keigo 2021, and thank you Horikoshi for these three very terrible pages. I am pleased to inform you that you’ve effectively gotten your point across and you may now commence saving this kid already

YAY

oh no, Keigo’s dumbass jerk dad tried to steal a car and the popo nabbed his ass and now his mom can’t just sit around neglecting her VERY YOUNG SON all day long, oh horrors. sorry lady my tiny violin is on backorder. just imagine that I’m playing a very sarcastic song on it for you

anyway so what are you gonna do now, abandon him? I can hardly imagine he’d be worse off, if anything it might be a near-instant improvement

LMAO HE’S ALL “WAIT WHAT ENDEAVOR’S A REAL FUCKING DUDE?!”

AND THEY SAY THAT A HERO CAN SAVE US~~~~ I’M NOT GONNA STAND HERE AND WAAAAAIT~~~~~ I’LL HOLD ONTO THE WINGS OF THE EAGLES, WATCH AS WE ALL FLY AWAAAAAAY~~~~

lol what a randomly pivotal moment in his young life. TIME TO GO MAKE THESE MEMES INTO DREAMS YOUNG ONE

anyway so his mom freaked out and grabbed him and they wound up at a train station with her TELLING HIM TO GO GET HER SOME MONEY, oh my god. SURE MOM LEMME JUST WALTZ RIGHT ON DOWN TO THE “JOBS FOR FIVE-YEAR-OLDS” STORE AND TELL THEM I NEED SOME CASH. ffff manifesting someone to come help him in 3... 2...

...

SIGH, JUST GO RESCUE THE PEOPLE FROM THE BUS, KEIGO. is this the outfit he was wearing when that happened?? it must be, right?? I can’t imagine them surviving more than a couple days out here unless this starts getting REALLY dark in a way I know that even Horikoshi won’t explore, so yeah. cut to the HPSC now please. never thought we’d be glad to see them. I mean sure, it may be an “out of the frying pan...” case, but good god

THANK YOU!!

and I guess it was his mom’s eyeball quirk then. anyway, whatever, see you again never, hopefully. lol oh man. thaaaat, was upsetting. need to center myself here for a sec. NAMASTE

OH YAY THE PRESENT

so we cut from Baby Hawks Angst straight to Present Day Hawks Angst, huh. not that this exhausted and traumatized lil lad isn’t still a baby to me too, I’ll have you know

BEST JEANIST, ALWAYS WITH THE JOKES

“WHEW, THOUGHT YOU DIED ON ME FOR A SEC THERE KID.” lmao. Caleb will no doubt ruin this by making his word choice all stiffly formal as usual, so I’m just going to treasure this “WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, I’M FRESH OUT OF FUCKS” version of Jeanist while I can

look at him, driving his Jeanistmobile

again, is it any wonder Kacchan was bitching about Endeavor’s dinky little car when he was used to riding around town in style like this. anyone else staring at this panel trying to figure out how this car is somehow secretly made of jeans

NOOOOO

FUCK YOU DABI LMAO. PUTTING THESE VOICE ACTORS OUT OF A JOB ONE BY ONE

anyway so Jeanist is all “GOOD THING IT’S THE FUTURE AND WE’RE SO GOOD AT MEDICAL SCIENCE” to handwave how Hawks went from one step shy of being a very handsome corpse, to sitting around texting Jeanist in a car all of two days later

OH MY GOD, AND FINALLY AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS

wait a minute. I’m so confused lmfao. soooo, was Hawks all “anyway, here’s Jeanist’s dead body, you can examine it but please don’t look at him too closely and also I’m gonna need that back unharmed.” how tf did you pull that off lmao

(ETA: also isn’t this technically confirmation of the ol’ Noumu Jeanist theory lol. I’m gonna go ahead and say it is.)

NO BUT PLEASE, CONTINUE. I unironically love reading Horikoshi’s overly convoluted “SEE IT’S NOT A PLOT HOLE” explanations

lkldslfk so wait, you’re telling me Hawks convinced Dabi and the League to put Jeanist’s body in storage, and basically just hoped they wouldn’t use him for any experiments until he could put his plan into action and have the HPSC’s people break in and find and revive him?? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG. A FOOLPROOF PLAN IF I’VE EVER HEARD ONE

fff this man really asked Jeanist to risk it all to prop up his little cover story, and Jeanist was all “sure why not” omfg. anyways, thanks for recapping all of this out loud for no particular reason in your car conversation you two

LMAO NOW WHAT

TROUBLE YOU SAY? GOOD THING THE NEW NUMBER ONE HERO IS ON THE JOB THEN

okay no it’s just some random thugs strolling around terrorizing the downtown. fuck ‘em. so Jeanist is making short work of them now

uh oh

won’t come? not can’t, but won’t?? what???

WOW

well I guess that makes the local heroes A BUNCH OF SHITHEADS now doesn’t it?? jesus

and okay, serious question, if the cops are spread too thin and the heroes have literally walked out on the job, what exactly is stopping everyone from deciding to use their quirks to defend themselves, legal or not? nothing, as far as I can tell. society just got a hell of a lot more chaotic

anyway so this is an interesting panel here

man, Dabi really did pull it off, didn’t he. well anyway so here’s that better world all of the villains were wanting, you guys! isn’t it so great?? everyone’s terrified and angry and losing hope and society is inches away from collapsing into total anarchy! but hey, at least we exposed the number one hero as a hypocrite

anyway so what are these guys up to

fucking hell, he’s visiting his mom. I really wasn’t prepared to commit this much emotional energy towards reading this chapter today. BUT VERY WELL, WE PRESS ON

?? wait she’s not there?

is this supposed to explain how Dabi knew who Hawks really was? except that there’s the little matter of how he even know where to find his mother in the first place. feels like we’re still missing something there, but oh well

OH MY GOD

RHA I TAKE BACK EVERY WORD I EVER SPOKE AGAINST YOU. YOU ARE A SCANLATION GROUP FILLED WITH ANGELS LMAO. I WILL TAKE THIS PANEL IN MY HANDS, AND TREASURE IT AND KEEP IT SAFE

ANYWAY, BECAUSE MY TIRED BIRD SON’S LIFE SUCKED SO MUCH ALREADY, IT TURNS OUT HE’S ACTUALLY PLEASED WITH THIS NEW TURN OF EVENTS LOL HOW ABOUT THAT

GOOD FOR YOU BBY. YOU GO OUT THERE AND BE YOUR OWN PERSON

and in all seriousness, I love that identity he chooses -- chooses, because it actually is him making a choice now, possibly for the very first time in his life -- is “guy who helps people”, though. it really is nothing short of miraculous that he held on to that kind of optimism and desire to do good even with everything he’s been through. there were so many times he could have chosen to turn his back on the world in retaliation for the way it treated him. but he didn’t!! and here he is now, finally free, and what he wants to do with the rest of his life now is simply to help others. anyway please excuse me for a moment, I need to go find some sort of basket or a big vase to put all of my fresh new Hawks Feels in, pardonne-moi

YEAH BOIIIIII

“FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS, MISTER JEANIST, WHERE DID YOU FIND YOUSELF THAT SWEETASS CAR.” hey, all I’m saying is if this boy’s wings really aren’t growing back, he’s gonna need to find himself a new means of transportation y’know?

oh my god you guys it’s a flashback to his mom buying him the Endeavor plushie when he was like two because, and I quote, ALL MIGHT WAS TOO EXPENSIVE

oh my god oh my god. my boy out here with a new lease on life finding hope in the darkest of times

wasn’t your throat supposed to be all fucked up lmao. Horikoshi was suddenly all “oh shit the VAs are gonna be pissed at me if I keep this up huh”

“that’s why Bubaigawara was such a great guy” motherfucker IT IS A TERRIBLE DAY FOR RAIN. FORECAST SAID NOTHING ABOUT THIS

:’)

yes ma’am. yes indeed. confirmed, I really will straight up fight some motherfuckers for this child. well not really, but YOU KEEP YOUR DISCOURSE OFF MY LAWN AND OUT OF MY BLOG YOU HEAR. THIS IS A HAWKS-FRIENDLY SPACE. WE RESPECT TAKAMI KEIGO IN THESE STREETS

and he’s saying (or is he thinking?? what a weirdly shaped speech bubble this is) that even if what Dabi said about the Todoroki household is true, “I’m not sure it’s the same now.” which happens to be ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. man this whole chapter really is all about saying “fuck the past” and moving forward and I am living for it

SON!!!!

“the first step is at my beginning” fklkjlk. what an iconic fucking line??

AND HIS WINGS!!!! THEY ACTUALLY ARE GROWING BACK AHHHHHHH. “PUT A RAINCHECK ON THAT CAR, JEANIST-SAN.” THE HAWKSMOBILE CAN WAIT, RIGHT NOW HE HAS TO GO INSERT HIMSELF BACK INTO THE TODODRAMA WHETHER THEY LIKE IT OR NOT

you guys. I came here ready for some BAKUDEKU HOSPITAL ANGST, and I got DIDDLY SHIT of that, and none of my other kids were even in this chapter, but!!! ASK ME IF I CARE LMAO omg. because bird son is hanging with his new best friend, and he’s out here Finding Himself and picking up the pieces and putting them back together stronger than ever because RESILIENCE HAS A NAME, AND IT’S SPELLED H-A-W-K-S, and you guys. profound, my love for this child. holy shit. hey google, play Silence by Marshmello

[itsclydebitches]

Until proven otherwise, my headcanon is that both Ironwood and Watts survived and are going to team up again out of necessity lmao.

HI, ANON. So let me tell you about how this simple, silly sentence sent me down a 4k writing rabbit hole. “Lol I’m going to write a little parody about that” I thought to myself and then somehow? It got serious?? I honestly don’t know what this fic is, but I’m chucking it at everyone anyway. 

Also, I changed the whole “Atlas and Mantle are immediately submerged in water” plot point because it’s my coping mechanism and I get to choose the canon we ignore. 

***

Once upon a time there were two villains having a Very Bad Day.

The first, Arthur Watts, had survived an explosion, being buried under rubble, and the threat of a ten-story drop only to find himself suffocating amidst a magically produced fire. A horrible way to go, all things considered. Painful, of course, but more importantly, no self-respecting man should die with soot on his clothes.

Or leave behind a charred corpse. 

In fact, Watts had just begun to acknowledge the full indignity of his death when the momentum he'd felt — just there on the periphery of his awareness — suddenly ceased, Atlas crashing into Mantle and throwing him with a squawk in the process. His head took a nasty hit against one of the desks, the smoky gray of the room growing darker, and by the time Watts had come to, the fire had been replaced by water.

Ice-cold water, lapping up to his knees.

"Well," he said, lifting a sodden boot. "I suppose this is an improvement."

***

Elsewhere, James Ironwood — former General of the now sinking Kingdom of Atlas — was lying facedown on the stone of the outer vault, contemplating his choices. Upon reflection, no, he didn't regret what he'd done, but it would have been nice if things had turned out...any way other than this.

"Fuck," he said to the empty hall, enjoying the reverberation. He deserved that much at least.

In time, Ironwood was able to pick himself up off the floor, supported as much by the fact that he'd been knocked out by his own blast as his shaky, barely-there aura. Up the elevator running on emergency dust reserves, through the corridors that groaned ominously under damaged supports. Ironwood headed towards the military headquarters purely out of habit and as he did the sound of water grew stronger, almost like waves, until there was an inch of it across the floor, more trickling in from the staircase. Ironwood had been watching his boots splash with each step, almost mesmerized, and didn't look up until another pair unexpectedly entered his view.

Watts froze in the act of wringing out his pantleg, eyes wide. His expression, the water, how the hallway tilted downward at a slight angle... it all felt like something out of a dream. Ironwood just watched as Watts watched him, until his eyes traveled to the gun clipped on his belt. Ironwood hadn't even realized he'd picked it up.

"Here to kill me, James?" Watts said.

"No." He knew it was true as soon as he'd said it. The mere thought of starting another fight right now was... exhausting. "Do you intend to kill me?"

"Oh really. Does it look as if I'm in a position to fight you? Do use your head for once. I have no weapon, no aura — damn fire ate it all up — I feel as if I've swallowed a hot coal, I am wet — "

Ironwood turned partway through the ramble, meandering back up the way he'd come. He'd passed through two checkpoints before realizing that Watts was not only still talking, but following him.

"What do you want?" he asked, more to shut the man up than out of real curiosity. If Watts was capable of reading the difference between the two, he didn't show it.

"Cinder."

"Cinder?"

"I don't make a habit of allowing people to try and murder me without consequence, James!"

"She's gone."

"Yes, thank you for that stunning bit of info! There's no possible way I could have realized that for myself. What's gotten into you? They left us, fool. Salem, Cinder, Neo, Emerald, even your so-called allies... they all deserve the worst that we can grant them. Though right now, I'd settle for wringing that idiot Pietro's neck. Ten years I gave to that research and he rendered it obsolete with a single report, all because he wanted to play father to some stupid hunk of metal. I never would have gone to Salem if — " Watts cut off, hands balled into fists.

Ironwood just blinked dazedly, coming to a halt. He searched his uniform, the scroll he'd stashed there miraculously whole. Dimly, he registered that he should be feeling some sort of emotion right now.

"I can do that," he murmured.

"What?"

But Ironwood was already keying in the code, the desire to complete a task, any task, taking hold. Watts looked on, mouth twisted in a deprecating sneer.

"I already took out communications, in case you failed to notice."

"But not the trackers I had installed in my top scientists." Ironwood held up the screen where a small, red dot was blinking. "Pietro's still here. Looks like he's out near the mine with a second aura signature. If you want to...?" He wasn't going to finish that sentence.

"I see," Watts said in a tone that heavily implied he didn't. "And you'd just give me this information out of the evilness of your heart?"

Ironwood considered that. "I killed a man yesterday, tried to kill two others, and was ready to bomb all of Mantle to keep the rest of my Kingdom safe. I don't care what you do with the man who betrayed me."

"...fair enough."

Except after five steps Ironwood realized that Watts wasn't following him. He was looking down at his arms, still as a hunted hare.

"You put trackers in all your scientists?" he asked.

"A requirement I implemented after you went missing."

"Ah! Ingenious. Lead the way then."

***

The way led to the tundra, an environment that neither of them were prepared for. Watts was wet from the waist down and Ironwood had long ago learned that snow and metal didn't mix. Neither had the aura for the kind of storm that was raging either. Luckily, the panic of Salem's invasion had left plenty of vehicles to purloin and soon they were speeding East with the heat on, the faint beeping on Ironwood's scroll growing stronger.

He'd felt the impact of his city crashing down and the two of them had clamored out of Atlas' husk, dropping into rubble and cracking ice. Still, the true destruction wasn't evident until they were moving away from it. Through the rearview mirror, Ironwood could see pillars of smoke from fires that the water hadn't yet smothered, dark shadows that could only be grimm, and Atlas itself, plunged halfway into Mantle. It wasn't noticeable from this distance, but all of it was sinking.

"I was lucky," Ironwood said, his voice hollow. His eyes flicked back to the expanse of snow ahead of them. "If Atlas had tipped the other way, the vault would have flooded. I'd have drowned."

Watts snorted. "I'm lucky. That damned water put out Cinder's fire. I'd have burned."

Neither felt particularly lucky and for fifteen more minutes, neither was keen to discuss it.

***

Once upon a time, two heroes were having a Very Bad Day.

"You've got to be shitting me."

Maria paused in the act of bandaging Pietro's leg, mechanical eyes narrowing at the two figures that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere. Watts sucked in a breath at the duo. Ironwood gave a small, awkward wave.

Then he nodded his head at the scene: one old, exhausted woman and a paraplegic currently bleeding into his chair. "So... going to kill him?"

Watts ground his teeth. "Well now that just feels like a fool's errand. Look at him. He's pathetic!"

Pietro was slumped at an uncomfortable angle, sporting a gash in his leg and an impressive display of bruises across his face. Maria, in contrast, seemed to have only lost her hair tie.

"Pathetic?" she spat. "Your lackey did this!"

"Who?"

"Angry girl with the creepy arm."

"Ah, it all comes back to Cinder." Watts pinched the bridge of his nose. "Yes, thank you for recognizing that I was her superior, but no, I didn't send her to kill the likes of you. Must have done it on her own, the little idiot. Don't believe me? I was in jail at the time, if I recall correctly. Isn't that right, James?"

"You were helping me hack Penny."

Maria let out a skin-crawling cackle. "Why do you think the girl was here? She blew a hole in the bottom of Amity! Penny tried to hold us up, but..." she swallowed, still pressing against Pietro's leg, but turned warily towards them. "You hacked her? You did that? What precisely do you think happens when a man who never learned to apply aura as a shield crash-lands in this hunk of junk!"

"I expect most men in that position perish," Watts said smoothly. "The fool is lucky to be alive, but he won't be for much longer if you keep trying to staunch the wound with your soiled gloves. Move aside."

"Get away from me!"

"Oh, put your stick down, you old bat. I'm trying to help."

"Why?" Ironwood hadn't realized he'd spoken until Watts was glaring daggers his way.

"So I can kill him later myself!"

Still surreal. Still dream-like in its absurdity. Ironwood listened to the bickering between Watts and... Mary? Maria? He wasn't even sure. He wandered away, content to gaze out through one of the windows at his Kingdom. Or what was left of it. He idly massaged his left arm, trying to rid himself of a pain that wasn't there, and when the howl of a grimm reached them across the snow, he shivered.

His unlikely companions screamed at each other loud enough to reverberate through the whole building. There were the sounds of two bodies trading blows, but only for a moment. Pietro, voice groggy and high-pitched with terror, demanded to know where his daughter was. 

"She's dead," Ironwood said. He didn't turn to see their expressions, didn't need to. "Winter she... she defeated me as the Winter Maiden. That can only mean one thing."

"One thing to you, perhaps." Ironwood did turn then, watching stoically as Pietro tried to right himself in his chair, Watts cursing as the leg continued to bleed. "Where is she? I want to see my little girl. I can heal her, fix her — " he broke off, doubling over with a cough that splattered more blood into his hands.

"Maybe you could have," Watts said, a cruel satisfaction in his voice. "If her little friends hadn't made her human."

Some of the pieces fell into place then. His Lamp, long missing, had apparently wound up in Neo's hands, then Salem's, before it was finally used by Cinder. Watts described — with immense pleasure — the plan the group had concocted and the wish they'd asked of Ambrosius. He'd been a bit preoccupied with bomb duty to learn the details, but he knew that Cinder lived and Ironwood, it seemed, knew that Penny had perished. What a tragedy. Do you know how to bring back the non-mechanical, Doctor?

Ironwood honestly thought the old woman was about to kill him, murderous intent put on hold only because Pietro collapsed then, curling in on himself as sobs wracked his frame. The only words that escaped the mess of tears were "Penny" and then "Maria," one hand reaching out blindly for comfort. Pietro found it, the two holding onto each other as Watts sat at their feet, grinning up at the display.

Ironwood thought only, So that is her name.

The other, crucial bit of info was that everyone was gone. Dead or evacuated, it didn't matter. As far as any of them knew, they were the last four in Atlas, with Salem on her way to destroy whatever kingdom next took her fancy. It was over. They'd lost. And despite the horror of it, the realization was oddly freeing too.

When Maria asked in a tone edging on hysteria what precisely they were going to do — because it seemed this was a "we" situation now — Ironwood suspected she meant in the short term. What were they going to do about their wounds? The grimm? Finding and reaching the others? But those were foolish concerns, the thinking of someone who'd never had a kingdom's life in their hands. Ironwood knew there was only one answer here, the same one he'd had from the start.

"You can do whatever you like," he said. The metal of Amity sparkled against the rising sun, leaving splotches of color behind his eyes. "I will defend Atlas."

Maria's mouth dropped open and Watts stared. Even Pietro ceased his crying long enough to suck in a breath.

"Defend it from what?" he asked.

Ironwood shrugged. "The grimm. Salem. I don't know. I don't care. To quote a former friend, I have never wavered in defending the Kingdom of Atlas against its enemies and I don't intend to start now. This is my city and I won't leave it."

"It's sinking!" Watts cried, overlapping with Maria's, "We need to help" and though so much softer, quieter, more innocent than the spittle Watts was scattering across the floor... that single word sank its teeth into Ironwood. The woman may as well have stabbed him.

"Help?" he said. "Help? I tried to help! Everything that I have done in the last two days — the last two years — my life! — has been to help not just Atlas, but everyone I feasible could. Don't talk to me about help when you and Ms. Rose did everything you could to stop me. I had planned to help the world and you all lied. You betrayed. You set your weapons against me and kept me from saving what parts of my Kingdom I could. Tell me again: what precisely did you do to help?"

He'd crossed the distance, one hand on his holstered gun and the other leaning against Pietro's chair, using it to leverage himself down into Maria's space. Ironwood didn't need to see her eyes to know the emotion they held.

"I," she spit, "didn't try to bomb a city."

And just like that the fight in him was gone. It had barely existed in the first place. Ironwood straightened, swaying slightly on the balls of his feet. "No. You didn't. So it's as I said, go help if you want. If you can." His gaze slid to Watts. "You were one of her men. That says it all." Pietro. "You helped them reveal Salem to the world. Will she have time to destroy the other kingdoms before the grimm do it first?" Maria. "And I don't know you, but you don't earn a prize like that without seeing combat." Ironwood lifted his metal finger, tapping it against Maria's goggles. She flinched away. "Can you honestly say you haven't made mistakes?"

"You and I are nothing alike!"

"I didn't say we were."

Ironwood turned and walked away, as steady as he could manage as the world grew a little darker, despite the sunrise. Behind him Watts' voice rang out like a shot.

"So that's it then? The captain goes down with his ship? You idiot!"

He paused. "Not quite. It turns out I'm not the only idiot around these parts. Ms. Rose left the vault open." One last turn to savor their shocked expressions. "That's where I'm going. There are still plenty of airships if you'd like to leave, but just remember: they abandoned you too."

Perhaps he should have been surprised that by the time his boots hit the snow, three more footsteps were sounding behind him. Frankly, in fourteen hours time Ironwood would barely remember their conversation, let alone everything that came after it. One of them drove back to the sinking city. Someone tested the ice before they cautiously crossed it. Someone else dispatched the stray grimm foolish enough to get in their way. Ironwood saw and heard none of it. He walked with the determination of a wind-up toy, wobbling now that he'd reached the end of his string. Cool blues, a shining gold, and then beautiful, miraculous grass. Ironwood ignored the murmurs of amazement behind him, dropping directly to his knees.

When his palms hit the ground, only one was capable of feeling how soft it was.

I need to update my arm, he thought, even as he curled into a ball and passed out.

***

When he woke they were already running out of time.

For the first two days Ironwood barely spoke to the others and thus he never quite figured out why they'd stayed. Had it been hopelessness? Spite? The all consuming thought that there was nowhere else to go? That Atlas, for all its rubble and slowly rising water, wasn't any different from what the rest of Remnant would look like soon?

Why not here then?

Especially when the vault, filled with wildflowers and an endless sun, made for such an enticing retreat.

"Soil's farmable," Maria said, running some of it through her fingers. It was a statement of fact, nothing more, and the three of them stubbornly ignored the implications of it.

"There's — " Pietro coughed, self-consciously clearing his throat. "There's plenty to salvage. Machinery to pull water from the humidity in here. First aid supplies. We could section off an area for our wa — "

Watts seethed. "If you finish that thought I will — "

"What?" Maria arched a brow. "Kill him? Like you've been saying for the last day?"

Day? Ironwood blinked. How long had he been out?

"I will!"

"Like you'd be able to. Just try it, beanpole."

They argued, and they threatened, but none raised their hands to one another again, and when they finally dispersed across the kingdom to collect what they could, none of the acknowledged what it was for.

Ironwood waded through the remnants of his home and didn't think about building another. Because the idea alone was absurd.

"Don't let the door slam shut," he'd said when they’d first left, nodding to the stone slab that had appeared after Penny had first arrived. Ironwood watched the three exchange glances, unsure if he was joking.

Fuck if he knew.

***

Those four days — or five, if Ironwood counted the one he'd lost — were conducted in a strange state of frenzy. None of them were in a position to be working on such a project, but when had the world ever cared for their needs? Pietro stayed behind in the vault, cataloguing what they'd found and making lists for what was still needed. His chair, while dynamic, wasn't meant for the sort of terrain Atlas had become and his wound was still healing.

He also seemed to appreciate the privacy, frequently mourning his daughter with an honesty that made them all uncomfortable. 

Maria went off to do the Gods only knew what, disappearing for hours at a time, then coming back wet, cold, and carrying little. Though she always had information. Which parts of the city were too grimm invested to traverse, which were now completely underwater, which were too unstable as Atlas tilted like a ship, disappearing beneath the waves. It gave them all focus and, surprisingly, something like hope. Whatever else she carried was usually small, such as the seeds filched from the bio laboratories.

"Couldn't take them all," she said, critically surveying the land, "what with so many of the labels getting lost in the crash. Don't want to eat something your lot has experimented on."

"You should. If we're lucky you'll mutate into someone bearable." Watts, taking stock of the clothing they'd gathered, didn't seem to realize that Maria was flipping him off.

He went on a deep dives (sometimes literally) for salvageable tech, most of it of a practical nature, but other pieces... not. Nothing had shifted Ironwood's world view quiet like day two, walking in on Watts looming over Pietro, assuming there was another fight brewing... only to overhear them exchanging theories, the conversation filled with as many insults as legitimate claims. Still, the seeds of camaraderie were there, and were perhaps easier to grow than originally thought. After all, Watts had once been one of them and Pietro, for all his heroics, had once entered Ironwood's office with a manic gleam in his eye, rambling about giving an aura to a machine. Defense technology at its finest!

 What was it Glynda had said? Ah yes, agreeing with young Ms. Nikos about how "wrong" it all was. But desperate times, desperate measures and all that.

They'd had that discussion, of course. Soon after Ironwood awoke, talk of Amity began again, this time about whether it was possible to send another message. With enough time and effort, not to mention luck... a short one, perhaps, and only sent to an individual scroll.  But what was the point? Who would they call? When no one could — or would — answer that question, the idea was dropped.

In the days since, Ironwood had fantasized about messaging Glynda. One of the few who'd ever been a true friend, perhaps the only one left alive who might care that he was still among the living... if Ms. Rose's message hadn't killed that too. Not that it mattered. Even if Amity wasn't a hunk of metal gathering ice, Ironwood hadn't a clue what he might say to her.

Dear Glynda,

Thank you. Sorry. Good luck.

Sincerely,

General James Ironwood

P.S. If things had ended differently, I would have asked for a second dance.

How ridiculous.

So he walked the broken streets of Mantle and climbed the streets of Atlas, more and more of it disappearing every day. Their hoard grew though, born of not just military property, but personal belongings as well. It wasn't as if anyone was coming to claim them. Unless more magic was at work, both cities would be miles beneath the ice before anyone crossed the border again. Still, Ironwood would always pause before packing away what he found in the hastily abandoned houses. Bedding. Utensils. The literal shirt off someone's back. He'd changed into jeans and a thick sweater the second day, taken from a collection of civilian clothes he'd placed into a locker years ago and promptly forgot about. The uniform felt... obsolete now, no matter that his goals remained the same.

He'd encountered Maria on one of those trips, admiring a basket of yarn in some nameless Atlesian's living room. Her shoulders had tensed at his approach, but she just snorted at the sight of him.

"You knit?" he asked, unsure of what else to say.

"No."

"Crochet?"

"No."

Ironwood didn't know any other crafts that involved yarn. "Then why are you taking it?"

Maria hummed. "Just a thought. That I might, someday, try to learn." She shook a book she’d pulled from the basket: Knitting For Beginners.

A stray thought indeed. The thing they still didn't talk about. The closest they got was on the fifth night when an explosion sounded outside, massive enough to unsteady them even deep within the vault. By the time all four of them had made it out and onto one of the roofs, the sky had turned a sickly yellow, followed by black tendrils that raced, turning, back and around on each other until everything went dark. The only light came from what little electricity they had running on generators and a red aura, pulsing from the West.

From Vacuo.

Realistically, it might have meant that they'd won. It wasn't as if Ironwood had any idea what the death of an immortal witch looked like. But the night wore on and they had no idea because that unnatural, starless black never receded. In time, Pietro wandered off and returned with two bottles he'd pilfered from somewhere, cracking the tops off on the side of his chair and passing them around.

They still didn't say it aloud, though the sky and the alcohol said enough already. Ironwood kept his eyes on the watch his mother gave him, hours ticking by until sunrise was long overdue. Atlas felt even colder now and that red, seeming to inch closer, sent a different kind of chill down his spine. The grimm that still prowled below had taken off hours ago, summoned by some unheard call.

Ironwood downed the dregs of his bottle and threw it into the city.

"Come on," he said. Ordered maybe, or asked. He wasn't sure he knew the difference anymore.

Blankets. Glasses. As many non-perishables as they could find. Generators. Tool kits. The building blocks of renewable energy. Clothing. Decorations. Wood to build small, individual dwellings.

Watts hoarded laptops and a small mountain of batteries, never showing them what he was working on, intensely protective.

Maria grew obsessed with entertainment, snagging every book, game, and video until there was a veritable library piled on the grass. She kept muttering about deserving a real retirement.

Pietro built a shrine to Penny, a simple stone monument to the left of the doorway. He tended to organize their supplies there, occasionally reaching out a hand to brush the code he'd inscribed with a laser. Whatever meaning it held, Ironwood couldn't read it within the ones and zeros.

And he... he found a cat. His last day, picking his way across dwindling islands until his eyes found the small, electrical fire just out of the water's reach. The cat had wedged herself into the rubble above it, trying desperately to keep warm.

She was as black as the sky above them and Ironwood was sure, when he reached out, that she'd run, terrified of his prosthetic hands. They certainly weren't any warmer, but she weakly crawled into them nonetheless. Ironwood held her securely against his left side, where his heart and flesh were, and thought with an absurd, internal laugh that he'd at least saved one.

There was so much left to do still, but their time was gone. That evening, eating what little they had the stomach for, water began to pour from the vault's elevator. First a trickle, then a deluge, until there was a sizable waterfall to admire. Ironwood sat on the steps with his unnamed cat on his shoulder, watching inevitability creep towards him.

He could still lie though.

"There's still time," he said, addressing the three behind him. "If you head up the elevator shaft and down the west hall, you can still break the surface. Find one of the remaining airships. Fly away."

Watts scowled, avoiding his gaze. He remained leaning against the doorway though. 

Maria and Pietro exchanged glances.

"I'd carry you," Ironwood offered to Pietro. They both knew it would be a death sentence with their combined deadweight, but he'd do it anyway.

"No," he said softly. "I did all I could already."

Maria. She was harder to read with those goggles, but it wasn't peace on her face. Guilt, more likely, but that had never stopped any of them before.

"It's damn cold out here," she muttered and marched back to the grass. Pietro followed her, Watts trailing not far behind. He turned back though.

"You coming?"

Ironwood didn't answer and eventually Watts left, heading into the meadow that stretched until you lost sight of where you'd been — and then reappeared there. A tiny pocket dimension, born of a magic now lost to this world. Ironwood figured that a bit of water and ice couldn't break it.

Probably.

He watched the flood cover the floor of the vault, then lap upwards, one stair at a time. There was a part of him, a part unimaginably tired, that thought he might just sit there. Keep rooted until the water was so high it was too late to do anything. That would be easy. Fitting, even. Shouldn't he go with his kingdom?

But then the cat — his cat — dug nails into his shoulder and Watts said something that made Maria screech. Ironwood sighed.

There were still things to protect, simple as that had become.

He turned his back on Remnant, now encased in an eternal night, and walked to the three who remained, cowering in an eternal day.

Ironwood allowed them one last choice and when they all nodded, he kicked the vault door shut.

[love-fireflysong]

yIt's done. It took me waaaay to long to write this piece out but between June and my computer apparently deciding to kick me in the teeth this month, the fact I made it to 5 full squares completed anyways I will gladly take as a victory! And, just fyi, this WILL be the last piece for this month. I know that there is still another four days left of June, but I am sick and tired of dealing with my keyboard so this is the last fic you're gonna see from me until I get a new laptop hopefully fairly soon. (Unless I decide that I'm desperate enough to try and write things out on my tablet of course...)

Anyways, the First Date trope was specifically requested by @jesus-hotsauce-christmas-cake when I let her know that the one she did guess (road trip) was going to be a second chapter of a twoshot. Which you still might get because I'm very likely going to be sharing the short little summary blurbs I had written down for each trope so people can very easily bully me into writing them anyways if people still wanted to read them. And even though it would be like months and months late, still post them under this bingo board because I can and I had a cool idea for what I was doing with the colours and layout before life decided to say 'NO!' in a very firm voice. (Unless of course the three lovely ladies that came up with this idea in the first place say no obviously)

Rambling over though now I promise. Chocolate Covered Confessions can be read over and AO3 of course, with the full fic also under the readmore as well.

Chocolate Covered Confessions

Trope: First Date Fandom: Until Dawn Characters: Ashley Brown, Chris Hartley Words: 8214 Rating: General (though reader beware there is some almost scandalous hand holding and a couple of scandalously public kisses. You have been warned...) Authors Notes: Oh look, more chrashley fluff. Who da thunk it? Pride month? What pride month? This is just me apparently figuring out how many different ways I can get Chris and Ash to confess their feelings. Because you only read like three of them, I still have another two waiting in the wings. Plus at least three others if you count climbing chrash lol.

Something was...weird. It wasn't something that Ashley could put her finger on just yet, but something was definitely off that was for sure. The problem of course was that she didn't even know where to start looking in the first place, because for the most part her day had been extraordinarily ordinary.

She, Chris, and Josh had planned to go and see a movie Saturday morning a few days back and then hang out the rest of the day. But seeing as they were, you know, best friends that certainly wasn't the issue. Not even close. They always made plans to do stuff like that together. And yeah, okay, so maybe Josh had 'coincidentally' texted them just before the movie started to let them know that something unavoidable had come up and he wasn't going to be able to meet up with them. And when her and Chris had brought up just waiting until a later showing when he was free, he had immediately been quick to affirm that nope, he was going to be busy the whole rest of the day actually. So the two of them could continue with their original plans and they could make it up to him another time.

While certainly suspicious, that wasn't what was wrong though. Josh had been flaking out on their plans more and more, especially when it was plans that took up an entire day. Ashley Brown wasn't stupid. No siree Bob she was not! She knew exactly what Josh was trying to do by leaving her to spend the day with Chris. Alone . And she appreciated it (she really did!), but if Chris was going to make a move then he would have done it ages and ages ago, because she sure as hell wasn't going to do it! Ashley Brown wasn't stupid, but she also wasn't exactly what you would call brave either.

Not that Chris had seemed to notice what Josh was pulling though, he had just sighed and rolled his eyes with a grumbled "fucking typical", and then the two of them had entered the theater to watch the movie. And as per their usual shtick when Josh wasn't there with them, Chris paid for the tickets while she paid for the food and drinks. Or, at least, that was how it normally went. Instead, when she had decided to take a run to the bathroom while he held their spot in the long concession line, she had come back to Chris waiting for her with the pop and popcorn already in hand. After brushing off her flustered apologies, he had explained that shortly after she had left, another cashier had popped on till so the line had gone down in half the time either had expected. And it seemed like a dick move to just wait there until she came back so he had just decided to get the food instead.

She still felt a little guilty about it honestly, even after swearing that she would get both the tickets and food next time.

And, to be completely fair to Josh, he hadn't exactly been missing out on a lot by skipping out on the movie. It wasn't a horror flick (he would never even think of skipping out on that after all) so it wasn't one that he would feel the need to make the two of them watch again with him. Which was more than fine honestly, because if she was to describe the movie in a single word, well, that word would definitely have been 'dreadful'. If she was given a few more words, then she would have easily elaborated and stated that it was 'a boring, plot-hole driven mess, with only extremely over-the-top action scenes and explosions every five minutes to carry any semblance of the extremely loosely written plot'. In other words, she had lost interest in the movie barely half an hour in, and considering that Chris had started scrolling through his phone bored, she wasn't alone in this boat either.

Still, Ashley had resolved herself to sit through this over-budgeted explosion fest if only because movie tickets were horribly expensive. Not to mention the fact that Chris had shelled out money for both the movie and the food. But then he had turned to her, asked if she was as bored to tears as he was, and once he got that confirmation, asked if she wanted to just ditch the movie entirely. And she did—she really, really did—but didn't want Chris to waste the money he had spent more. And then yet another explosion...exploded on screen, and she realized that she was wasting precious hours of her life that could be used to do something more fun and less mind-numbingly boring.

Like watching paint dry. That at least had a semi-cohesive plot.

And so the two of them had walked out, continuing to share the extra buttered popcorn between them (the movie may have been awful, but the popcorn certainly wasn't) as they left the movie theater behind and wandered into the nearby mall. That wasn't the strange thing either. The mall and subsequent window shopping had absolutely been part of their day plans after, even if those had been unexpectedly pushed forward a couple of hours.

Admittedly the art show that the mall was running in one of the empty storefronts was unexpected, but  it had been simply a nice surprise and a great way to kill time. So after paying the $2 entrance fee, the two of them had continued to share the popcorn as they looked at some of the paintings and sculptures that had been on display, giggling childishly at most of them. And okay, so one of the curators had been glaring at them( or rather, at their greasy, butter-covered fingers) the whole time, but that had just been a little rude and insulting. Not strange. And that had stopped almost the moment they had run out of popcorn, Ashley nudging him in the stomach with her elbow as she licked her fingers clean, and the two of them laughing under their breaths at the curator who had looked exceptionally much more at ease once Chris had crumpled the empty bag into a ball.

The rest of their day in the mall had just been spent following the rest of their day's plan, wandering from shop to shop and browsing at all the things that caught their eyes, and then taking a break after a few hours to have a late lunch in the food court. The two of them checked out another couple of stores, these ones to try and get some ideas for Josh's birthday in another month, before moving onto the small arcade on the top floor. As part of their deal and agreement since it had just been Josh and Chris (Ashey not joining the duo until five years later), Chris bought the tokens needed while she scouted out the various games for an empty console and claimed it until he could join her in another couple of minutes.

They spent the next hour in there, trying to beat each other or work together depending on the game in question. They almost never played a game twice before moving onto the next one, in hopes to both try as many games as possible before their self imposed hour ended and to see if they could beat their previous high scores or make it onto the leaderboard in only a single try. But as the hour came to a close, they both made their way over to their final game: one of the racing simulators scattered around the arcade. And as had been done for ten years now, played to determine which of them would be paying for the tokens next time they came.

And once the race ended, with Ashley winning by photo finish for the third time in a row (and celebrating her winning streak by maturely sticking out her tongue and doing an awkward little shimmy dance in the seat while Chris jokingly sulked and pouted), they had finally left the mall altogether and got into Chris's truck. There, he had surprised Ashley with the novel she had been eyeing in the bookstore (or at least, eyeing closer than all the rest she had picked up) and that he had somehow been able to buy without her noticing. And that certainly hadn't been weird, because it had been so exceptionally sweet of him, sweet enough that Ashley had so badly wished that she could thank him properly. But as mentioned before, Ashley Brown was a coward pure and simple, so she had just clutched the book to her chest and beamed at Chris in heartfelt thanks instead.

He may have said something in reply, but Ashley had already settled into the passenger seat and opened to the first page of the book, so she was already long gone. A fact that Chris had anticipated, if the light chuckle he had let out before starting the truck meant anything. And no, Ashley reading a book while Chris drove them to their usual game store across town was not the strange thing either. If Chris hadn't wanted her to read on the drive over and talk to him, then he never would have given her the book now of all times. He would have waited until he had dropped her off home, or not even bought the book in the first place. After over a half a decade of friendship, if anyone knew what would happen after giving Ashley Brown a new book, it was Chris Hartley.

The drive over is done quicker then she had expected, and even then Chris still hadn't let her know that they had arrived until she had finished her chapter. Yes he had certainly teased her about it the entire time, joking about how she would never find someone as understanding of her reading habits then him (he didn't know how right he was, that she didn't want to find anyone else), but the fact that he had just continued to let the music play in the truck and distracted himself on his phone was so unbearably sweet that she decided to let it lie.

The fact that Ashley and Chris hung around in the game shop comparing dice and looking at new books while wincing over the prices for nearly two hours wasn't what was off either. Hell, if anything the fact that they only spent a couple of hours there before leaving was weird! Her, Chris, and Josh could easily spend almost half a day in there flipping through comics and rolling dice to test them out, only leaving because a tired employee was forced to ask them to leave for making too much noise and taking up a table when they weren't playing anything, especially when there was a group that had been waiting for a table for close to an hour now.

Which brought Ashley to where she was right now, sitting at a sticky plastic table under the shade of a cheap umbrella while Chris had run off to get them some ice cream before dropping her off at home. Her new book was open in front of her, the pages crisp white even in the umbrella's shade, but her mind wasn't on the book anymore. A random line had a character mentioning that something had been feeling off all day ever since they woke up ('like everything had been moved three centimeters to the left, so while it all looked normal, nothing felt right anymore'), and Ashley had also realized that hey, wait a second, her day was also feeling just a little wonky too! But no matter how hard she thought about it, she couldn't put her finger on exactly what it was. Today had just been a normal day hanging out with Chris after all. They went to see (and bailed) a movie, spent hours hanging out in the mall and at the game store, and now they were each going back home. Nothing unusual had happened, so why did it feel like something hugely monumental had been going on all day?

"Oi. Earth to Ash, you okay in there?"

A light flick to the center of Ashley's forehead has her blink in surprise, and she finds herself back into the present once again. Chris is standing next to her, carefully balancing the two cones in his right hand and his left ready to flick again if needed, and a bemused smile on his face.

"Oh, uh, sorry Chris. Got a little too into the book I think." She closes the book, not wanting to get melting ice cream all over its crisp white pages (and she really hasn't absorbed a single word for nearly ten minutes now), but Chris doesn't hand her the cone just yet.

"Yeah, I'm not buying that," Chris says as he snorts in disbelief. "I know your 'praise be to books' look, and that was not it. That was your 'head full, too many thoughts' look."

"Excuse me? What? I do not have a reading look! Or a thinking look for that matter!"

"Oh you do. You really, really do. Trust me. You may have been staring at that book but there was no way that you were reading, I would bet my own ice cream here on it." Chris brandishes his double chocolate cone at her, then seems to reconsider and switches to show off her own dipped soft serve that he still has yet to actually let her eat. "Actually, you know what? I would eat your dipped monstrosity if I'm wrong."

Ashley sighs, but she can't keep the smile from her face. "It's not that bad this time, oh my god. It's chocolate ice cream dipped in blueberry syrup. This is actually a normal combination for people who go out of their way to order more exciting cones then two scoops of chocolate." She leans forward and places her elbows on the table to support her head in her hands. "But I wanna see you do it anyway, so tell me exactly why you're so convinced that I wasn't reading."

Chris opens his mouth, but immediately closes it a second later, as though he didn't realize exactly what he had signed himself up for here until now. Ashley of course takes it as a sign of victory. "I knew it. So let's see this Chris, I wanna see you eat something that isn't—"

"When you read you get, like, super attentive." Chris's face is pink, and not looking at her but at the book on the table as he bashfully continues. "You become so drawn in to whatever you're reading that you ignore everything going on around you, because all of your attention is now on that book. Pretty sure a bomb could go off right next to you and you wouldn't even notice sometimes. And it's always so easy to tell what's happening in the book when you're reading too, cause your face is always so expressive. Like your eyes get big when something exciting or surprising happens, and when you're really enjoying whatever it is you're reading, you start giggling like a loon."

Ashley is too stunned and, quite frankly, her heart is beating too fast for her to even think of a proper response to that . She manages to squeak out a quiet little "oh, um" but Chris doesn't notice. Not when he's still babbling and not looking at her at all.

"But when you get deep in thought, you're not like that at all. All of your attention goes inward, and everything around you disappears cause all the important stuff is going on inside your head right now. Your mouth falls open just a little, sort of like you're gaping at all the information in front of you. And-and sometimes you'll mouth out what's going on inside your head as you try to fit the pieces of everything together so it's neat and tidy like a puzzle. And even though you have the, like, blankest stare imaginable, it's not empty at all if that makes any sense. Cause your eyes narrow and your forehead scrunches just the tiniest amount so you have a small little wrinkle form like right here—" with his unoccupied hand Chris points at the bridge of his nose right between his eyes "—and it's weirdly, insanely cute? But when you finally figure out the puzzle in your head, your face lights up like a kid on christmas morning and...and..." He lets his words trail off and stops awkwardly there, as though finally realizing exactly what he's been saying this entire time.

His face is almost beet red now, and Ashley is pretty sure hers is too. "Oh, uh, wow. I-I didn't realize you paid any attention to me when I was like that..."

Somehow his face only gets redder, and though he mumbles the words under his breath, Ashley can still make them out. "I'm always paying attention to you."

But not close enough attention it seems, she thinks sadly. If you did then you would have noticed something way more obvious than that. But she doesn't want to embarrass him anymore than he already is (then she already is), and she isn't sure what else she could possibly say that wouldn't be her blurting out that she likes him, so instead she pretends that she hadn't heard a single thing and wordlessly accepts the ice cream that he hands to her, accepting her defeat as she takes a small bite of the blueberry covered chocolate soft serve.

...The blueberry covered chocolate soft serve that he had bought for her. Or, you know, the ice cream he had paid for himself. Just like he had paid for everything today. Kind of like it was almost a, uh, date. Like he had taken her on a date.

Oh .

"Oh boy, let me guess: I was right and your ice cream really is a crime against taste buds?"

Ashley comes crashing back down to reality to see Chris, his face still a little red but the playful smile back on his face as he teased her. And yet, that only makes it worse as she can't help but feel the usual gymnastics routine the butterflies in her stomach perform at that particular smile, only they're a thousand times worse now that's she's realized exactly why today had felt so strange. And she can't help thinking how much everyone else would classify what was just a day hanging out with her best friend as a date. And how much she really, really wished it was one.

"Nope," she unfortunately squeaks out, and clears her throat so she can continue in a more normal tone of voice. "Nope, sorry to disappoint Chris, but the ice cream tastes fine." She takes another bite for proof (and to her credit she's not lying, it tastes more than fine). "Just, uh, realized something funny that's all." And the moment the words leave her mouth she realizes just how badly she's screwed everything up, because there is no way in any world that Chris Hartley is just going to let that comment lie.

"Funny? Oho, well now I'm interested. You mind sharing your glorious epiphany with the rest of the class Miss Brown?"

Taking another small taste of her ice cream, Ashley averts her gaze as she gives what she is kicking herself for is obviously an extremely forced laugh. "Did I say funny? I meant boring, just super boring actually."

"Well now I just want to hear it more."

"No, you don't. Trust me, you really, really don't."

Chris's brows furrow in concern. "Ash? You okay?"

She isn't, of course she isn't. She's now realized exactly what a date with Chris would be like, and it would be exactly like this. With them going to all the same place and doing the same things but she's allowed to hold his hand and kiss him when he does stupid sweet things like buying her the book she's been eyeing and talking about all day. She's never wanted something to be so true so badly in her life. And it's likely this thought in her mind that causes her to blurt out "A date." before she even realizes what she's said.

That only makes the confusion on Chris's face go deeper, which is appropriate considering she's sinking deeper and deeper into her chair in a futile effort to hide or escape as well. "What? Are you saying that you just remember what date it is today? Or that you had something you were supposed to do today instead? I'm not really following you right now Ash..."

This is perfect. It's the perfect excuse, she could laugh and say that she totally forgot what day it was and that she had an essay due pretty soon, or that she was supposed to babysit for a neighbour tonight. Anything really, the sky was quite literally the limit. And instead she just bit her lip and stared at the ice cream melting in her hand before weakly admitting "No, a, uh, date. As in, the romantic kind. I realized that today probably looks like a date to anyone else. Funny, huh?"

She's not sure how Chris would react to that. Maybe a startled laugh, and hand wave as he brushes her off. A scoff as he assures her that this definitely isn't a date, cause they're just friends and that's all they'll ever be. Whatever the reaction she expected, it was certainly not the fumbling for his ice cream as he nearly drops it in his shock, and how absolutely flustered he sounds as he trips over his own tongue. "W-what? I-I-I, uh—I mean, th-this obviously isn't—Who would even—? Wh-what would even give you the idea that we could um, possibly be on a date?"

Ashley shrugs weakly. "Isn't it obvious Chris?" She ignores his even more flustered babbling that no, he absolutely did not see what was so obvious as she continued on, still too nervous to look him in the eyes. "You've kind of paid for everything today."

"I wha—? I mean, no I haven't!"

"You kind of have, Chris. The theater?"

"You know I always pay for the tickets, and it would have just been really rude to make the line even longer!"

"The art show?"

"It was just a couple of toonies! And you saw the face of the worker there, they would have kicked us right out if they'd had to break a twenty. It was just easier."

"Lunch?"

"They-they'd had a special on for a two-person meal at that stall in the food court, and they wouldn't let each of us pay half..." he neglected to point out that Ashley could have easily paid for their lunch, and probably should have, but before she had been able to offer he'd already been swiping his debit card.

"The arcade?"

"Okay, that was my turn to buy the tokens, you know that. That one doesn't even count."

Ashley lifted her eyes from the ice cream to the book that sat menacingly and innocently all at one at the center of the table, it's pristine cover mocking her. "The book?"

"T-that was just a gift! You seemed really into it at the store and friends buy each other gifts all the time—"

There was no describing how soft and nervous her voice got as she asked the question that would put the final nail in the coffin. "The ice cream?"

"I, uh, it was just—um..." Chris let out a breath in a weak chuckle. "Shit, I guess I kind of did, huh?"

Ashley doesn't say anything, and neither does Chris, as the table goes silent. She's bracing herself  for when Chris inevitably shoots her down and confirms that it doesn't matter. That the two of them will never be anything more then friends and that she never should have hoped for anything more and by revealing this she's ruined their friendship for good—

"Hey, uh, Ash?" He sounds so nervous that it immediately takes Ashley out of her anxiety driven thoughts of doom and gloom, but she can't do anything more than just shakily nod to let him continue. "It's, uh, probably like a really, really, really stupid question but—" he takes a nervous breath "—did you want this to be a date?"

Her head immediately shoots up as she stares at him with wide eyes, her breath caught somewhere in her throat where her heart is currently lodged. She frantically rakes her eyes over Chris's face looking for any hint that he's mocking her, or playing some cruel joke on her and her feelings, but all she sees is just nervousness all over a pale, shaking face with what she thinks ( prays ) is a glimmer of undisguised hope. But it's still too much uncertainty, and she's too scared to risk it all on a mere glimmer that she is likely only imagining because she wants it so badly to be real, so she throws the question back at him instead.

"...would you have been opposed if this was actually a date?"

"Nuh uh, I asked you first."

Ashley realizes that he's just as scared at what the answer might be as she is. She wants to tell him, has wanted to tell him for years and years and years. And maybe this is the chance she's been waiting for her whole life. The two of them sitting at a sticky plastic table under the early evening sun, long forgotten ice cream melting in their hands, and she can finally tell him that she's had such a huge crush on him since she was twelve.

"Yeah." The word is less choked out than it is released. Like it's a breath of fresh air and she feels simultaneously lighter and heavier for it. "I-I think I would have liked that. I would have liked that alot."

Chris snaps his gaze up to meet hers, and the glimmer of hope that she had seen earlier has now nearly taken over his face at the disbelieving smile that's threatening to crack his face in two. "Really? I-I mean, uh, I would have been alright with the idea too. More than alright actually."

She can feel her own smile start to nervously match his, and then the first giggle breaks out. His own ecstatic laughter quickly follows her own until the two of them are both giddily laughing at the table, but too embarrassed and bashful to even look at each other now. The giggling abruptly cuts off when Chris lets out a yelp of surprise when he realizes how much of his ice cream has melted onto his hand and Ashley joins him in trying to finish off their ice cream before it's melted entirely. But there's definitely a change in the atmosphere around them now. The contentness and laid back ease that always formed between them whenever they hung out was still there, but there is a charge that hadn't been there before either. An excited anticipation that only surges higher and higher whenever Ashley shyly glances in Chris's direction to find he's looking at her with the same disbelieving smile beaming on his face.

They never say anything more about it as they both finish off the ice cream, but Ashley knows. With that little agreement, the entire day had changed. This wasn't just them hanging out as friends anymore, this was an actual, factual date now, pure and simple. So when Chris hands her a couple of extra napkins to clean herself off, she may have let her fingers brush against his for just a moment. The resulting blush and dumbstruck smile on his face when he cautiously took his hand back so he could clean up the rest of the mess on the table was oh so worth it. And when he returned from his trip to the garbage can and held out his hand as an offer to help her up from the chair, she accepted it readily.

Once she's back on her feet, the two of them drop their eyes to stare at their still clasped hands, realizing that they could easily hold hands the entire short walk back to Chris's truck if they wanted. And she does want that—horribly in fact—but it seems it's still a little too early for either of them to make that teeny tiny but monumental jump to hand holding so they let go awkwardly and slowly, letting their fingers linger against the others before letting go completely. As though giving themselves a taste of what may yet actually come to pass in the (hopefully) very near future.

The short walk back to the truck is filled with both anticipation and dread alike, but unusually silent. Ashley knows it's because she's now a buzzing ball of nervous energy, terrified that saying anything at all will shatter this dream that's apparently coming true before her eyes, but Chris is different. He looks more like he's trying to work up the courage to say or ask something, and is spending all his energy on that alone. So when he reaches out to open up the passenger side door for her, Ashley can feel her heart pick up speed when he stops with his hand on the door handle and looks at her nervously. His mouth opens and shuts a couple of times as he tries to work up the courage to say whatever it is he wants to say, and all she can do is stare at him expectantly as she struggles to hold back an excited smile.

"Hey, Ash, ca—nevermind. It's, it's stupid. Don't worry about it." A second later, he has the door opened for her and the moment she can't see his face, she lets her smile fall crestfallen. But only for a second before a polite one replaces it as thanks when he closes the door for her and continues to his side of the truck. It's fine, she supposes as she buckles herself in, while the two of them have been hanging out all day, it's only been an actual date now for barely ten minutes. And once he drops her off home in just another few short minutes it's going to be over. The fact that she even managed to get this far is franky mind blowing, so expecting anything more from her dreams would just be extremely selfish. She can't have everything she wants all at once, no matter how long she's been waiting for it.

The drive back to her place is also quiet, filled with only the droning of the radio playing in the background. Ashley's returned back to her book, but she knows that Chris knows that she's not absorbing a single word, hasn't turned a single page even. She keeps glancing at him out of the corner of her eye as he nervously taps at the steering wheel, and then tightening his grasp when it looks like he's going to say something, only to return to the nervous tapping when he inevitably backs out at the last second and returns to the frantic pep talk he's likely giving himself. The air that fills the vehicle is heavy and thick with anticipation and it's taking almost everything in Ashley to not start shaking the question out of Chris at every red light they stop at.

But, eventually, they pull up in front of her place and Chris stops the truck. There's a moment where the two of them just sit there, not wanting to leave because leaving means the end, and Ashley schools her face into a cheery smile in an effort to hide as much of the disappointment as she can when she turns to face him and bid him farewell, only to have it fall to confusion when he starts fumbling at his own seatbelt.

"Chris? What are you doing?"

He struggles further at it, frustrated that the buckle's apparently decided that now is the perfect time for it to stick once again. "Trying to get this fucking thing off."

"Yeah, I figured that much. But why are you trying to take it off, you're just gonna leave right away again anyway."

He slows his fumbling as cheeks start darkening in embarrassment. "I, uh, I just thought that was something you were supposed to do after a date, walk them to their door to stay goodnight. I mean, at least I think this is a date now? And, and only if you're okay with it! I can stay in here instead if you don't want me to. I was just hoping..."

The once forced cheery smile on her face is certainly not being forced any longer, if anything she's trying not to show how much the idea of Chris walking her to her door thrills her. "N-no!" Well, so much for trying not to show how desperately she wants that. The startled look he gives her at the unexpected outburst had her trying to control her voice into something less desperate, but considering she doesn't think she's ever going tame the frantic butterflies that have been flapping around non-stop in her stomach ever since the ice cream realization, she's probably doing a terrible job of it. "I-I mean if you want to, it's completely up to you after all..."

"Cool. Cool cool cool. Just, just give me a second." He continues to struggle with his seatbelt buckle, letting out more and more agitated curses escape the longer the thing continues to stick, and Ashley is getting the feeling that if he was able, Chris would have ripped the entire thing straight out of the seat by now. Broken safety laws and ensuing repair costs be damned. The moment he finally manages to unstick the traitorous buckle it's with a cry of victory and relief so exuberant that Ashley finds herself laughing in disbelief and awe that he had wanted to walk her the short ten or so feet to her front door that badly. Thankfully, for both of them, her seatbelt unclicks easily and much more quickly in comparison, only taking another couple of seconds to grab her bag from the footwell and joining him.

The far too short walk up to her door is over before either of them realize it. One second the two of them had been standing awkwardly and nervously by the truck as she fought the urge to reach out and grab his hand, and the next they're standing just as awkwardly and nervously (if not moreso) in front of the front door. Both of them waiting for the other to say or do something to break the tension, but cleanly aware that doing so would signal the very final end of the day, and the date. In fact, just knowing that Chris doesn't want this to end just as badly as her, is what gives her the courage to look at him with a surprisingly heartfelt and soft smile.

"Today was fun."

Chris lifts his eyes from where they had been staring at the dried leaves on the doorstep to match her smile. "Yeah. It was."

"And thanks. For the movie, and everything else." Ashley raises her hand to give the new and still shiny paperback a small wave. "And, you know, the book too. Of course."

"Yeah, it was no problem. Anytime." There's something with how he says the last bit—not really emphasizing it but making it clear all the same that he means 'anytime'—that causes her face to flush giddily as she pulls her lower lip in between her teeth in a weak effort to fight back against the ecstatic smile that forms anyway. And when she sees his eyes lower just a smidge to follow the motion and the way his shoulders stiffen in reaction, Ashley very quickly also finds she's trying (much more successfully) to hold herself  back from just saying 'to hell with it' and throwing her arms around Chris so she can finally kiss him silly and until they're both breathless. But considering that she's too much of a coward to initiate something as innocent as hand holding apparently, there is absolutely no way that something as...as scandalous as kissing him on her doorstep is ever going to happen. Clearly.

And yet, she gives Chris another few seconds to try and work past that blockade in his throat, but when he still can't muster a single word, she decides to just put the both of them out of their misery. Or further into it. It's probably just the same thing really. "I guess I'll see you next time. I'll talk to you later, okay?" She turns away and puts her hand on the doorknob, and tucks the book under her arm so she can dig into her bag for keys, but is stopped when Chris's hand abruptly snakes out and wraps itself firmly around her wrist before she can reach into the bag. And it works—boy does it ever —turning back to him and the hand wrapped around her wrist as excitement just starts to bubble up inside of her.

A second later though, his brain has apparently caught up with the movement he clearly hadn't intended to make, because his face goes beet-red and he's dropped her hand so he can shove both into the pockets of his jeans. He averts his eyes so he's back to staring at the loose gravel and dried leaves under their feet.

"Oh, uh, sorry about that. I didn't mean to..."

"It's fine, Chris." Ashley tries to smile softly at him in reassurance, but it's considering she's gripping the doorknob in an almost vice-like grip in anticipation, it's likely far more eager than she would like. "What is it?"

Somehow, his face goes even redder and he blurts out the question so fast that it may as well have been one word. "CanIkissyou?!"

Immediately, Ashley's gaping at him wide-eyed and her mouth open in shock as her heart's beating so fast that she's pretty sure it's ready to burst out of her chest at any moment. "Wha—"

"I-I mean goodnight. Can I kiss you goodnight? That's what people are supposed to do on dates, right? A-a-a-and I think we agreed that this is a date now, or at least I really, really hope we did. Cause I've wanted to go on a date with you for the longest time and-and-and I didn't want Saundra or-or-or any of your neighbours to see cause I know that would just really embarrass you and me but I've been trying to ask you for the past thirty minutes now cause I've wanted to kiss you since forever but I was scared about how you would react cause I really, really, really like you Ash and I just wanna to kiss you so fucking bad right now you have no idea and—"

Ashley would like to believe that she's brave enough to throw her arms around Chris and drag him down into that searing kiss she's been dreaming about forever and ever, but she doesn't. Even with a confession that is everything she's ever wanted to hear and more. That's not to say that she doesn't want to do it—god does she want to do it—but she's so frozen in place from shock that she physically can't. So instead she just continues to gape at him as he (adorably) rambles on and on, and giggles out an elated little "okay".

His nervous rambling stops dead in its tracks, and he finally looks back up at her, nervous relief evident all over his face. "Really? I mean, are you sure? I'd understand if you didn't want to—"

" Chris ."

That immediately shifts the relief to a different kind of nervousness entirely, one of excited disbelief, but even then neither move to actually initiate this promised kiss for several seconds. Instead just staring at each other waiting for the other to be the first to move, Chris with his hands still in his jeans pockets and Ashley glued to the doorknob with her other hand frozen as it hovers over her bag. Finally, Chris is the first to slowly bend down to meet her awkwardly half turned body, and she unsteadily tries to rock herself onto the tips of her toes without losing her balance completely and falling over. And still, they both pause about an inch away from each other's faces, though whether to give the other an out if needed or just to work through the logistics of how to do this exactly without their foreheads or noses smashing into each other or Chris's glasses getting in the way is anyone's guess.

But finally, mainly due to the fact that Ashley can't lean forward anymore without falling completely on her face, Chris closes that final bit of distance and kisses her. It's a nervous brush of the lips really—a quick peck at best —but they jolt back from each other so quickly that the single action may as well have activated some hidden magnetic repel function that neither had been aware of until this moment. Both of them are staring at each other wide-eyed and breathless as the magnitude of what they had both finally managed to accomplish hit them. The kinda-sort confession and the almost hand holding meant absolutely nothing in comparison to this. Those she could have (and would most likely have) brushed off as her reading too much into innocent statements and gestures when she thought over everything that had happened today in the safety of her room later tonight. But this? This was physical proof .

Looking back, Ashley's not sure which of them moved first. One second they had been staring at each other in disbelief, stuck in the same awkward bent and leaning stature from before, and the next it's as if the magnetic attraction between them reverses its flow entirely. Chris is cupping her cheek with one hand as he kisses her in the way she always dreamed he would, his other hand slowly skating across the back of her neck so he can pull her up closer to him. The book that had once been clutched protectively under her arm was completely forgotten about—fallen to the ground with a sharp crunch as it crushed the dried leaves beneath their feet—as her arms wrapped possessively around his shoulders as she props herself as high as the tips her toes will allow her. She can still taste a hint of the chocolate from earlier on his lips, and the small part of her that isn't being blown away by all of this is wondering if he can taste the blueberry and chocolate on hers as well.

She's not sure how long the two of them stood there on her doorstep, kissing for all the world to see, but she does know that they still separate much, much too soon for her liking. Not that they fully separate of course. She may be back on the soles of her feet, but neither of them have removed themselves from the embrace itself. And with the way that Chris is lightly brushing his thumb over her cheekbone as he just stares at her with the same stupidly giddy grin she's got, Ashley would be perfectly fine if they could just stay standing like this forever.

"So..." she starts, and stops to take a moment to giggle when Chris bumps his nose into hers. "I think that was a perfectly acceptable first date if you ask me."

Chris doesn't let go of her when he leans back to consider her, the comically raised eyebrows in shock doing nothing to take away from the absolutely thrilled beam of his smile. " First date? Why Miss Brown, are you perhaps asking me out for a second one already?"

"I mean, if it's not too presumptuous of me, I suppose I am. I-if you're not opposed to it of course." She can't help the way her nervousness starts to bleed through with that last sentence, already panicking that she's somehow completely misread everything that's just happened and that maybe that kiss didn't mean as much to him as it did to her after all.

His next words completely derail those fears entirely. "Of course I'm not, I would love nothing more than to go on a second date with you. Followed by a third and fourth and even a fifth if you have the time for it."

"I mean, I'm a pretty busy girl but I think I can open up as many days in my schedule as it takes if I need to."

Before she knows it, the two of them are leaning in for another kiss when the sound of pot being dropped in the nearby kitchen through the open window jarringly brings them back to reality and the two of them let go of each other red faced and embarrassed. Oh no, how much of this had her mother heard? Or worse, saw? She wants to leave the doorstep (which is rapidly becoming her favourite place in the whole entire world) even less now, but the longer she takes the worse the excited interrogation from Saundra will be so she starts digging back into her bag to try and find her keys once again.

"I'll text you later, okay? And, maybe, we can talk some more about that second date...?"

The reply from Chris is flustered but eager. "Yeah, totally. I-I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Cool. And um, the next one's one me. The date that is. It's only fair after all."

"Yeah, right. Only fair. Totally. And, uh, your book..."

She finally finds her keys from where they had sunk to the bottom of her bag, and looks up at him and the paperback book that had fallen during their, uh, intimate embrace. "Oh! Uh, right. Thanks." She could easily leave it at that, but the last few minutes have made her bold so when she reaches out to take the book back from him, Ashley curls her fingers over his and bounces onto the balls of her feet so she can give him one last kiss on his cheek—almost the corner of his mouth really—before finally stepping back with the book and keys in her hand. "I mean it. Thanks . For everything."

"Yeah. No problem. It was my pleasure."

She lets herself have one last glimpse of the stupefied grin on his face just as he turns to walk just a little unsteadily down the path back to his truck. The only sounds being the leaves crushing underfoot and the jangle of metal as she sticks her keys into the door to finally unlock it. A sound that it quickly interrupted by not only the click of the door unlocking, but a muffled shout.

Alarmed, she turns quickly expecting to see Chris having accidentally shut his coat into the door as he is sometimes known to do when the weather gets colder, but instead watches in elated shock as he continues to keep energetically flapping his arms and fist pumping into the air and screaming what she can vaguely make out as 'yesyesyesyesYESYESYES' over and over again.

Suddenly it hits her. Despite the shy confession over ice cream, and then the much more rushed and rambled one only minutes ago, and followed by the kiss(es) that are still sending her heart into rapid fire, Ashley still hadn't believed what all the evidence had been saying. Chris liked her. He really, really liked her. Possibly as much as she liked him even! This wasn't just a one-off event that would now make things awkward between them for the rest of their lives. This was happening. They'd just had a first(!!!!) date and after Chris had kissed her goodbye, she had asked him out for a second one.

And he had accepted .

Ashley fumbled with the door and the moment she was in the house, slammed the door behind her, not even bothering to lock it. She let her bag fall from her shoulder to the floor with a soft thump and slowly slid down the door until she was sitting against it with her eyes wide and breathless. She ignored the surprised clatter coming from the kitchen as Saundra immediately dropped whatever it was she had been doing in and held up the book so she could stare at the once innocuous cover in amazement.

He had bought her this book and the ice cream because he liked her and he had gladly and excitedly accepted to go out on another date with her. And even more if he had been serious about that third date and beyond line.

And not that either would ever know it, Ashley mirrored Chris at that exact moment by placing her head into her hands and screaming as the built up joy and bliss finally exploded out of her.

[vaguely-concerned]

The Mandalorian Chapter 15 reactions; *nobby nobbs voice* ‘s all gone a bit percychological, sir

 - so from both chapter 6 and now this: rick famuyiwa is incredible at portraying prolonged discomfort and tension (and also at getting din’s endless love for that baby across through the stress of being separated from him. this is the very first episode with no baby in it at all, isn’t it? wow that’s a heartbreaking milestone to reach im crying)

I liked this episode SO MUCH but I had to pause it pretty often and take a breather because it all made me so viscerally uncomfortable on din’s behalf -- not just the armour and having to take the helmet off and be seen for the (almost, ilu IG-11) first time in decades, people keep touching him in this episode when he clearly doesn’t want them to but can’t stop it and it makes me want to claw my own skin off in sympathy, it’s so awful. that’s really neat film making to manage to keep that tension steady almost all the way through!!! 

honestly this episode felt a little bit like psychological horror, with the cheering storm troopers and din in the wrong armour and clearly not digging it and there’s the palpable absence of baby and that ever present dread of being Perceived when you’re not ready for it; everything’s turned upside down from how it should be. and it’s playing with that discomfort both in the main character and in us, the audience, in having the familiar be made unfamiliar and also introducing these questions that shake up everything (that feeling you get of ‘but... if it’s not the helmet, and not the armour, but there’s his face, but we’ve only seen that face once before so it’s still basically new to us, is this... is this still him. is this still Dad’ (oooh I wonder if we’re... sort of getting some of the ??? the baby would be feeling about it too?) we’ve all imprinted on that t-shaped visor like little baby birds, and this was a very clever episode to break us out of that and start to really get used to the thought of him having several faces that are real simultaneously, in a way, and not just a voice. it’s all very smart and interesting and I’m sure I’ll have a lot of incoherent thoughts about this in the weeks to come lol)    

- the actual reason din can’t take off the helmet is that if people were able to see his wide confused puppy eyes they would no longer find it in themselves to send him on long arduous side missions and would help him immediately just so he’d feel better, and that would rob us of like 80% of the content for this show 

mayfeld in this episode: clearly a casualty of this. he literally sees one glimpse of the vulnerability there and then within five seconds goes on to materialize a few redeeming character traits after being a complete jackass for an episode and a half. (I mean. he was 100% still an imperial so I’m a bit ‘hm.’ about how easily especially cara let him off the hook, but with the way it was set up I guess it would have been quite shitty of them to just throw him back in prison so I mean I GUESS. I would be endlessly grateful someone got my awkward bff out of there alive and well too I suppose)

- I actually think din’s sense/integrity of self has gotten so much stronger and more resilient (though probably still quite fragile pls handle with care precious cargo within); if this had happened in the first season I think it might honestly just have killed him (and if it weren’t for IG-11 it probably would have lol)

- can you beLIEVE din is so bad at lying that they literally should plan for contingencies over it fjkasdlhfskajdhfsdj     

- very grateful for the scene with the spear throw that’s basically there to reassure us ‘uh-huh, he absolutely knows how to use it, don’t worry about that part at least’

I want to make a whole post about that fight scene, though, it’s just so GOOD! there’s so much storytelling and characterization in it! even out of the armour din has some real hand to hand MOVES!! he clearly came out of that aching all over, he can barely get back in his seat!!!

- so what I’m mainly taking away from this is that din absolutely cuts his own hair and you know what? he does a good job considering the conditions he has to work under, I love him  

I still find it so goddamn darling that he meticulously maintains that little mustache/stubble combo under there even when there’s every reason to believe no one will ever see it 

I suppose we can also gather that he did not ask cobb about whatever insane feat of magic he’s come up with to avoid helmet hair, but I don’t care looking a bit frazzled and tousled is exactly right for him (he’s so put together when he’s in the armour and a MESS when he’s out of it and I  l o v e  it) 

- boba fett is honestly so fucking hot in this I don’t know what to do with myself haha. he’s so CALM and CALCULATED and COLLECTED in his newly painted armour and he’s GOT THIS and he made that ‘I’ve got one of those faces. one of jango’s many, many, many faces’ joke and he’s so thicc now, he looks like he could easily lift me over his head with one hand and he’s just quietly steady and undramatically supportive and sdalfhsdjhfsa 

- ...din does know who the clone troopers were, right. I mean of course he does. he has to. but does he though. I’m sure he does and just wasn’t thinking. 

- no matter how stressful it was I’m still really grateful that in the end taking the helmet off was something din got to do himself -- it’s under some duress, but it’s still his choice and for the sake of the baby, and almost in two more manageable steps between putting on the storm trooper gear for a different helmet before taking it off altogether. it’s not something done to him by gideon, for example, that would be. so much yuckier and worse. he still has that control and agency intact, even if it’s been tested really hard, and now gideon doing that doesn’t hold the exact same nightmarish power anymore because there’s already a little space opened in din’s mind for different things it can mean, if you see what I mean. I’m not sure I see what I mean actually I just have a lot of feelings haha. so I guess thank you mayfeld for being decent about it and helping him towards that realization that he can still be himself outside these really really inflexible structures he’s set up around himself for like. stability and keeping himself upright for a really long time, and that even someone halfway decent won’t disrespect the boundaries he still has about it at any given moment. man there’s a lot in this episode isn’t there

- the sigh din gave when he saw even more pirates coming and knew he had to get back up... never has a single moment in cinema better captured how I feel about being alive. most relatable man in the world din djarin

- it was really cruel of them to make me listen to din’s dead bleak voice say ‘the child is gone’ again, it wrecks my heart every goddamn time 

- again... I wish carano wasn’t Like That in real life because the cara & fennec scenes should have been everything I could ever dream. ah well fennec was still wonderful and if I just allow myself to think in-universe for a few seconds it was really touching that din would entrust cara with his entire armour, that’s some prime BrOTP energy right there

I love that we got two female characters who were just allies and working together, no competition or nothin’. listen the bar is low but it’s nice to see something actually leap gracefully over it as well lol

- this was one of those with some pretty big open plot holes (why, exactly, would a scan of a completely unknown face be helpful to get into this classified system lol), but a) I don’t care, the emotional storyline was so sound it doesn’t really matter and b) eh handwave handwave let’s say mayfeld programmed that little stick with the good shit and overrode the code saying there needed to be an identity match within the system, it’s all fine 

- I know I joke a lot about this but din really is one of the most relatable characters I’ve ever had. just watching him struggle with eye contact and going pretty much nonverbal under enough stress is like. wow a bit close to home there could we, perhaps, nOT?? (honestly though these are trauma/anxiety things I really don’t see portrayed a lot, especially in protagonists, it’s so odd but healing to see it in a character I love and who’s EXTREMELY competent in many other settings)

- din repeating gideon’s speech back to him word for word (except for the crucial detail that he calls grogu ‘him’ instead of ‘it’ 😭😭😭) and saying nothing else is truly Everything. I’ve said some stuff about din’s deliberate and thoughtful relationship to language in the past and this is such an amazing example of it; he’s remembered that pitch perfect all this time, he’s kept it around in his head and mulled it over and then redeployed it to change the meaning of it completely from dehumanization to love. can you. can you even imagine. and it’s yet another example of his hilarious wonderful petty streak and I can never get enough of it fasjhdfkjalhs    

- din always noticing the children first and foremost Y_______Y (the kids running by is the only thing you see him sort of acknowledge when he’s walking into the covert in season 1 too)  

- please... please I just need him to be able to hold that baby against his chest all safe and sound and okay again I can’t it’s........ hh

NO SEASON END CLIFF HANGER ON THIS I AM  B E G G I N G  YOU 

- I would be having some thoughts about how much space there actually is on slave 1 and what that might mean (do not kill boba again please don’t kill him again), but honestly there’s only ‘GET BABY’ hours in here now, I can’t speculate about anything

[vodkaxtonic]

Hi! I saw that requests are open, what about one where Shika and reader grew up together and are childhood friends but both develop feelings? I don't know how the plot would go though lol

Can’t get you off my mind •Shikamaru Nara x Reader•

PART 1

A/N: There will be a second part to this oneshot!

Wordcount: 1K

It was in the middle of the night and once again Y/n couldn’t find rest, despite her body begging for it. Her mind didn’t seem to shut up, racing with thoughts of what could’ve been if she was brave for once. Y/n could be brave, no doubt in that, especially since she was a jonin, but in the matter of love, she wasn’t brave at all.

A deep sigh escaped her mouth as she let her hands run over her face, closing her eyes. Behind her closed eyelids, there he was. Shikamaru Nara. Her childhood best friend and crush of almost seven years. Seven pathetic years of longing for a man she knew would never have feelings for her in that way. He had Temari. They were a good couple, complementing each other perfectly and even Y/n could see that, despite the pain that erupted deep within her chest every time she saw them together. But it was her own fault, she figured sooner or later. She could’ve told him that she had feelings for him, and maybe, just maybe, they could’ve ended up together. But ruining a friendship for silly feelings? Y/n wouldn’t risk it, Shikamaru meant too much to her to lose him like that, to scare him off. And ruining his current relationship? She couldn’t do that to him or Temari, even though Temari hated her.

“For fuck’s sake,” Y/n groaned as she saw the angry red numbers on her bedside clock. It was almost three in the morning. Of course, tomorrow was the day she had to herself, and now she couldn’t sleep.

An hour later she was finally dozing off, and she probably would have fallen asleep, if it wasn’t for the continuous knocking on her door. With a loud groan she untangled herself from her sheets, annoyed and tired making her way down the stairs. Whoever was bugging her now should have a good reason, else she’d start a fist fight, not even caring that she was in shorts and a way too large shirt.

“Shika?” Her eyes squinted and her eyebrows furrowed even more, if that was possible. “Did I wake you up?” He asked, cheeks slightly red as he scratched the back of his neck. She shook her head no, before inviting him inside. “What is it?” She asked, fingers tiredly combing through her hair as she eyed her best friend of 15 years. They knew each other since they were five, almost unbelievable how much time passed. “Temari and I kinda got into a fight. I need a place to stay for the night.” His face took another shade of red, embarrassment eating him up. If Y/n only knew that the whole fight was because of her. But Shikamaru wouldn’t tell her that, she’d only blame herself and it wasn’t her fault. Y/n nodded, before walking off to the bedroom.

Shikamaru followed her, opening her closet as if it was his home. With a sigh he bent down, picking up the spare clothes he had at her place. It was something they did after they realized that it was just easier, so he had some at her place, just in case. “When was the last time I slept over?” Shikamaru asked himself, a chuckle escaping his mouth as he found his shirt and sweatpants. “Centuries.” Y/n muttered tiredly as she fell into bed, but not before throwing another blanket and another pillow into bed. “I think it was a week before Temari and I started dating, so, two years ago?” Y/n hummed in agreement, the pain in her chest rising. Two long years. Two years she hated herself for not opening her mouth earlier.

Shikamaru sighed as he turned off the lights, laying down beside Y/n. Her bed was easily large enough for both of them to fit without touching each other. Maybe he should feel guilty, laying in the bed of the woman that he and his girlfriend fought about, instead a feeling of peace and happiness filling him up. The only light that illuminated the room was the full moon, drowning everything in a dark blue.

“Y/n?” Shikamaru asked, cutting the silence between them. “What?” Y/n answered, opening her eyes before rolling onto her back, mocking the position of her best friend. Staring holes into the ceiling. “Do you remember when we were younger, and people would always tell us we’d date someday?” Shikamaru asked as he clasped his hands behind his head, sighing, “Why didn’t we?” Y/N’s breath hitched, her heart speeding up a bit. Shikamaru’s voice was soft, gentle, and for a moment it seemed like he actually liked her more than he admitted. “I don’t know, Shika,” Her voice was barely above a whisper. Shikamaru pressed his lips together, frustration consuming him. “Can you say something else than ‘I don’t know’?” He snapped a bit, making Y/n sigh and run her hands over her face. “If I say I wanted to date you during our friendship, it would get awkward between us, especially with Temari, your girlfriend, in the picture,” She muttered as she counted the cracks in the paint on her ceiling, “If I say I never wanted to date you during our friendship, I’d be lying. There is your answer, now go to sleep.” Y/n muttered, her heart pounding as she turned her back towards him. Was this being brave? She couldn’t tell. Shikamaru let the words sink in as he turned to the other side, his back barely inches away from hers and he could feel her body heat. For a moment he contemplated if he should turn around and just embrace her, like he always used to do, but this would be too much for both of them. With another deep breath he closed his eyes, slowly drifting off into his sleep.

When she woke up the next day, her bed was empty. A frustrated groan escaped her mouth as she pinched the bridge of her nose. She said too much. She showed too much of herself. “I fucked up, didn’t I?”

[ftstorm]

My take on 5x10

Welp, that was a big one!

You know, before going into this episode I reminded myself this was the first episode of a new era, the first episode completely made by the new team.

So with that in mind my expectations were "Okay, let's see what they've got."

And oh boy did they surprise me.

DISCLAIMER: this text post is long af, not kidding.

1. THE INTRO SCENE.

You guys have no idea how glad I am that we got Mac doing a usual MacGyvering in his house. It's been ages since they implemented this format of showing his dynamics outside Phoenix and around his house.

I wasn't worried about the proposal thing at all. Guys, you have to accept that MacRiley was always going to happen after that 4x04 episode.

There was also the fact that this was the intro scene (usually the most important plot issues happen in the outro scene), Bozer's weird reaction and the melancholic audio cue.

If that proposal was happening, they would've made it more uplifting.

(I gotta say that watching Monica Marcer and the official MacGyver account making damage control in Twitter 3mins into the episode was a funny experience)

So my initial questions about Mac wanting to propose were: "what are his motivations?" and "how is this not going to work out by the end of the episode?"

The second question we got the answer later on. The first question remains unanswered. If we take on Mac's words, he says:

Mac: Unexpected, I know, I know. But that's why I like about it. You know ever since I lost my dad and Jack I've been thinking about the bigger picture. A commitment to make things work it's exactly what Desi and I need. A grand romantic gesture. *cue melancholic music*

Here we're presented with a bunch of things worth analysing, in my opinion.

He's trying to see the "bigger picture" which, for me, it means he's trying to tackle down different issues from his life with one specific, efficient action [the proposal]. Those issues being:

> his current romantic relationship: make is aware they have an inconsistent relationship > his performance at work: he needs balance between his personal affairs and his work, which is based on saving the world in a daily basis and for that he needs to be focused. > dealing with his past losses: to my understanding, saying "ever isn I lost my dad and Jac I've been thinking about the bigger picture" means that he doesn't want hopelessness to take over him, he wants to keep on moving and being proactive about his life.

So... you have to understand that in some sort of way, this proposal thing is a signal that Mac is healing. In some sort of way, if you were in Mac's shoes you would see that it was a positive thing for him. A step forward.

The thing is, we [the audience] have an extended understanding of the situation and we know that an engagement would be an incredibly rushed decision.

As well as it is that Mac's trying to move forward, he obviously hasn't been able to pinpoint the true issue behind his relationship with Desi. He isn't wrong about them lacking in the commitment department, but forcing the relationship to scalate isn't the right move. He should be asking himself: "Why are we avoiding commitment?"

And that's when he'd find out that they have very deep and important trust and communication issues.

~~~~

2. Moving on. MURDOC.

Russ: I can process it more efficiently by having it all spread out ahead me, you know. I reckon see the bigger picture at once.

This is when I realized that the episode was centered on this whole "bigger picture" idea. Russ struggles to see the full picture until the very end and Mac finds out that he hasn't been seeing the full picture of his life at all by the end of the episode.

Fast forward, the team's in Mexico, Riley knows about the ring already and she has already had the talk with Bozer in which she refers to her feelings for Mac in a past tense.

Then Murdoc appears.

And as if the episode wasn't already a rollercoaster after Mac's reveal, now Murdoc shows up to put everything upside down.

First I gotta say, man Dastmalchian is SUCH A GOOD MURDOC. Excellent actor. The way he delivers his lines, his facial expressions, all of it make an original and very entertaining Murdoc.

He always gives me such a Andrew Scott's Moriarty vibes and I love it.

Secondly, his dynamic with Andrews: *cheff kiss*

I loved how Andrews was so over Murdoc's theatrics, to the point his facial expression screamed "Why did I even reclute this guy" LOL.

Back to the story.

This is something I was hoping it wouldn't happen but at the same time I don't see another way it could've happened which is the explanation behind Murdoc's escape and how Phoenix didn't know about it.

Because what they told us is that the FBI didn't let them in on Murdoc's escape, right? Does that imply that the FBI has a corrupt agent in charge? Does it imply that the order of not letting Phoenix in came from above? Maybe someone with higher clearence than Matty? A politician? Governement conspiracy?

It smells like plot hole, tbh. I feel like the Murdoc's escape is a classic "it is what it is". We'll see if they come back to this in later episodes.

~~~~

3. BIG SECRET REVEAL 1.

By now we're at the point of the rollercoaster where you're going up and up and up. Your tension building more and more as you're getting close to the drop.

Bozer and Riley's audio was the drop.

You know, during this scene I jumped from my seat, closed my eyes, cringed, squealed, my heart accelarated, forgot how to breathe...

As a person who is a little bit bipolar when it comes to romance (I can be very shy about it or very outspoken about it) that scene made me SO UNCOMFORTABLE.

Imagine having your feelings exposed not only to the person you have feelings for but also his girlfriend who happens to be your friend, your boss and the criminal that's threatening to kill hundreds of people.

I was like: "Not like this!!"

And Mac's reaction didn't help because of the lack of it. I don't know what I expected but his slightly monotone reaction broke my heart.

Thankfully, I've recovered since then and I don't mind that it happened that way.

Still, imagine how suffocating it must've been for Riley. That idea was what made me so uncomfortable and I think that's what they were going for. They wanted to make it as straightforward and awkward as possible.

But it doesn't end there. It's followed by Mac revealing the ring to Desi (and Riley). Mac's in "fuck it" mood and Desi kinda panics.

Little side note here, using GUM and a DIAMOND to break a bullet proof glass... BIG YES. That's an intrinsic MacGyverism.

~~~~

4. BIG SECRET REVEAL 2.

Then we get a breather from this drama by introducing another drama, Leanna's death.

Bozer's reaction to the news was heartbreaking for my already heartbroken heart.

I have my suspicions as to why they decided to kill her... The other episode completely made by the new team was the Quarantine one (5x06). During that episode Mac and Bozer bond over Bozer's pain. After learning about Bozer's mom, Mac chooses to share a piece of his own pain with him.

So, hear me out, I think they writers are planning to help Mac process his own grief THROUGH Bozer's grief. Keep in mind that we still have a Bozer centered episode coming up.

This is just a theory. I may be wrong, but I think it may be right too.

Back to the episode.

Once again we see a three dimensional Russ. He does something accordingly to his own judgement thinking it's the right decision [hiding Leanna's death], he realizes he screwed up, he gives Bozer a very heartfelt apology about it.

Henry's acting talent shone with this narrative. Actually, most of the actors had the chance to shine THANKS to the NARRATIVE. Murdoc, Andrews, Desi, Mac, Russ and Bozer... they all had their highlight moments (I'll talk about Riley later).

Parenthesis here... THE NARRATIVE HAS RETURNED THEIR SOULS TO OUR DEAR CHARACTERS!

WOW, they aren't brooding, angry, sad or whiny ALL THE EFFIN TIME. ABOUT TIME!

~~~~

5. LAST ACT.

For the third or fouth time in this episode my heart broke again when Mac was friendly towards Riley, after she explained herself. It really felt like he was friendzoning her.

But here's something to point out. Riley visibly relaxed when he reacted that way. What does that tell us?

> She had been so tense up until that point. Imo, she's on the defensive now. You can even see it in her wardrobe, make up and hairstyle choices. They're very contrasting to Riley's most vulnerable moments in this show (like when Audrey broke up with her).

Riley has had a year to sort out her feelings. We see in this episode that she spoke about them in a past tense. Whether she achieved it or not is unknown. We just know that she has at least tried to move on.

> She was mostly afraid of ruining her close relationship with Mac (who's her only family, along with Bozer) and her friendship (?) with Desi. We've seen it over and over again: Riley DID NOT WANT to get in the middle of them.

Keep that in mind as we go in the last scene.

It took me a while to figure out a possible thread of thought inside Mac's mind. Why did he look at the ring and decided to go to Riley's house? It really didn't make sense to me.

One moment he was thinking about his proposal and somehow that lead to him having the necessity to know if Riley still had feelings for him? Why??

My theory is that he went to her apartment for permission.

His question was a way of asking Riley for permission to propose to Desi. It was a way of reassuring himself that proposing was still the right decision.

In a way, he could also be fishing for an excuse to not do it [the proposal].

Because now he has doubts. He's confused, unsure.

Mac asks:

Mac: Hiding your emotions and letting it pass. Did it go away?

What could her answer have been? Here I wanna go back again to Riley being emotionally defensive, added her strong desire of not wanting to be in the middle of Mac and Desi's relationship.

I think she would've said "Yes, it worked."

Because it also lines up with my idea that the love triangle has changed from "Riley's a better match for Mac" to "Mac needs to win Riley's heart".

Riley's done her job. She worked out her feelings. Now it's time for Mac to sort out his humongously messed up internal self and reignite her spark. That's what I think.

Also, if anyone has any idea on how the song that played in that scene relates with the moment please share it with me because I don't really understand the song choice lol.

~~~~

6. ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

Desi. I'm not sure what's going on in her mind. She seemed stressed out by the ring, very serious about Riley, lenient with Mac... I'm really not sure.

My guess would be that she doesn't want that type of commitment but she wants to be with Mac yet she can't ignore Riley so does that mean she has to end it with Mac? That's the thought process she may have had? Idk...

I'm glad they let her be mature about it, with no overreactions, no whining, no blaming, nothing of that style that we're used to see in her.

I'm also glad about that moment when she defeats Murdoc and Andrews. THAT'S HOW YOU WRITE A TOUGH DESI. It was filmed with such a gracefulness and elegance. I liked it.

From a MacDesi point of view, she's probably being open minded and giving him space and waiting for him to come back to her... but somehow I got the vibe that she's actually... running away?

Lastly but no less important.

THE HISPANIC REPRESANTION OMG. RUSS SPEAKING SPANISH AND THAT CUMBIA MUSIC FILLED MY HEART WITH SO MUCH PRIDE!!! :')

[makingsofgreatness]

I just finished rewatching Treasure Planet and found your blog immediately after. I see you do Sarah/Silver hcs. If you haven't done it before, I'd love to hear your thoughts on how they first met, how they gained feelings for each other, and the beginnings of their relationship? Much love! 💞

Oooh, this’ll be fun! And very long lol. A warning, lot of rambling will happen!

-Alright, so, in a previous post I mentioned I’ve been working on a story about Sarah’s life for the past few years. There are a lot of plot holes still and things I haven’t exactly figured out yet, but I’m enjoying the process of figuring that stuff out. It’s messy, it might be confusing, it might not even make sense, but I’m trying to have that all worked out so it does. Anyways, in that story Sarah and Silver eventually fall in love. We’re going to skip the messy parts that I haven’t figured out yet and pretend everything makes sense lol.

-Sarah and Silver met on a huge, long voyage where they both worked as cooks. Sarah was longing for something more in her life, and Jim would be gone for about 6 months on a school training expedition, so she managed to convince Amelia to let her join. Silver...well, I haven’t figured out exactly why Silver would even be allowed on this ship, especially when it was captained by Captain Blake with Amelia as his first mate, but shhhh. We’ll ignore that for now. All I care about is fluff lol. I have an idea that Amelia only agreed to let him on because she had a secret plan to arrest him as soon as they got back but that’s still in the works. Who knows if it’ll work out.

-Anyways, since they were working together nearly all day, they of course bonded. It was awkward at first. Sarah was a bit wary of Silver, even though she knew Jim trusted him with his life. He was a pirate after all. Silver wasn’t sure how to talk to Mrs. Hawkins. He didn’t know if she would accept him. But their love and appreciation for Jim kept a conversation going between them always, and their relationship evolved.

-Silver was the first one to catch feelings. It surprised him greatly. He hadn’t been romantically interested in anyone for a long, long time. He was also falling in love with Jim’s mom, of all people! He feared that would ruined the relationship he had with the boy. But he couldn’t stop the feelings from growing stronger. He was with Sarah pretty much all day, which meant he got to eventually see a side of her most didn’t. She grew comfortable around him and wasn’t afraid to be more expressive. He found her personality captivating. He caught himself staring at her eyes longer than he thought was necessary. He used all the compliments he could think of on her just to watch her blush and give him that shy smile. Silver couldn’t recognize himself when he was around her.

-Sarah began to catch feelings shortly after Silver did. Silver was quite the charmer and genuinely funny. She appreciated how fondly he spoke of her son. She admired his hard work and how he was quick to help her out. But at the first sign of attraction, her instinct was to push him away. She had been hurt deeply by other men in her life...how was he any different? But he kept pulling her in. Her heart fluttered when his hand brushed against hers. She couldn’t help but laugh with him when he laughed at something she said. She felt giddy when she saw that smile of his. She was falling and she was falling hard. The more time passed, the more she learned to trust him and let go of her fears.

-of course, there were plenty of other people aboard that ship. Sarah and Silver became good friends with a lot of them! (Insert a bunch of ocs lol) And OBVIOUSLY, when they found out about the romantic tension, which took a while because it was kept on the low for quite some time, they monitored the HECK out of that relationship. They gave Sarah pep talks when she was unsure, talked to her about her fears of rejection, and were honestly the most amazing support for her. In turn, they just teased Silver mercilessly. When the two finally admitted how they felt to each other, the rest of the crew members were ecstatic! They were all very invested lol. The support gave Sarah more confidence within this relationship.

-nearly all of the crew members knew each other. They had been a crew for a while and had been on some pretty rough adventures together. Therefore, most of them knew how to fight. I won’t spoil it, but in the story there is a moment where Sarah’s safety is greatly in danger because she doesn’t know how to defend herself. When she’s safe again, she forces Silver, as well as various other crew members, to teach her how to fight. Everyone was like hell yeah! Except Silver, who was very hesitant. He was afraid of hurting her. But he does eventually. Their training sessions made them grow even closer. Sarah became a rather good fighter quickly, she was a fast learner. And now Sarah and Silver were a couple that could kick butt together?? Adorable.

-Through trials and difficulties Sarah and Silver realize just how important they are to each other. They bond over the long period of the voyage and especially when danger arises in the midst of it all. There’s sooooooo much more to this headcanon than I can possibly explain in a single post, I should really get started on writing that dang story 😂

Feel free to ask more questions or give me ideas for this story, I’d love to hear them!

Thank you for this ask!! 💕

[drawlfoy]

Drawn to You (cheesy but i refuse to change it)

masterlist request guidelines requests are open!

pairing: draco x ravenclaw!reader (finally! my first ravenclaw reader!)

request: yes! i’m pairing two together, kind of...if you requested the draco x ravenclaw reader without any other plot specifications other than him being jealous, this one is kind of for you. i didn’t know how to fit the jealousy part in, but you sounded thrilled to have anything ravenclaw and this was next on my list and i didn’t know what to write since i had no other plot points. also...the person who sent this request in, this is for you as well! it’s getting out much sooner than expected, but that’s just because i’m combining.

summary: draco notices a ravenclaw girl doodling him in class and decides to confront her.

warnings: none! just sweet fluff, maybe some cursing.

a/n: oof i’m so sorry for not posting anything for a while! i’ve been going through a rough introspective moment in my life when it comes to my relationship and i feel like i’m on the verge of a breakup and i just kinda feel shitty, so that’s why i’m not writing as much as i should be. i’ll be okay, though, i have no doubt about it. if you have words of wisdom i’m all ears haha. also shoutout to my laptop for deleting the draft of this and making me rewrite the whole thing LOL

music recs: orpheus under the influence from the buttertones

word count: 1,812

taglist: @accio-rogers

Umbridge was a horrible teacher, even when she wasn’t acting bigoted and racist. Her classroom was so soulsuckingly boring that even her Slytherin pets found themselves tired of it. 

So, naturally, as Umbridge instructed the students to copy down a passage from their blasted textbook three times, Draco Malfoy couldn’t help but let his eyes wander across the room.

He was always an efficient writer and made quick work of the task, but as he scanned the room, he found that no one else was in the same boat as he was. He ran his fingers through his hair, already drafting the letter that he’d send his father when he got back to the dorms about how Umbridge sucked the life out of every class and that the ministry ought to do something about it. His father would find something to do to make her treat students, or at the very least, Slytherin students, better.

The back of his neck tingled, like someone was watching him. Draco’s eyes shot around the room, trying to see if another pair of eyes were trained on him. 

There. 

It was a brief moment, but he had seen a girl with Y/H/C hair duck her head down at the table by the door. Looking closer, he could see a blue and bronze tie around her neck. The girl was wearing her uniform, but it looked slightly tampered with--a brooch and a flower were attached to her lapels and a midnight blue scrunchie resided on her wrist. 

Ah, he knew who it was. He had never spoken directly to Y/N Y/L/N before (he was never close to any Ravenclaws), but he often saw her floating through the halls, conversing quietly but passionately with her friends at meals, and curled intently over what he thought was a journal in the library. She had a slightly dreamy vibe, but not in the loony Luna fashion...it just seemed as though she looked at everything around her through a different, more delicate lens.

Draco knew he needed to stop observing her like a creep, but there was something off about the Ravenclaw. She was intently focusing on a piece of parchment in front of her, but her textbook was forgotten and pushed off to the side.

She swiftly glanced up again, meeting his eyes and freezing for a moment. A soft rose began blooming on her cheeks as she tried to nonchalantly scan the room, pretending like she wasn’t just looking at him. After she seemed satisfied, she ducked back down to whatever she was working on.

Then it hit him. Her hand was moving in methodical but varied strokes and she often spun the parchment to regard it at a new angle. Draco realized that she wasn’t writing--no, she was drawing something. 

He leaned forward in his chair, attempting to catch a glimpse of the picture. His tries were in vain, however, as he was much too far away to make out anything.

Draco was overtaken by an intense curiosity to know what she was drawing, and in typical Slytherin fashion, he had a plan. 

Raising his hand, he asked Umbridge if he could go to the loo. She quickly granted permission--he was one of her favorite students, after all. 

He rose up from his chair, carefully maneuvering his path so he would be forced to walk past Y/N’s table to get to the door. The girl was so engrossed in her work that she didn’t even hear him approaching.

However, once he saw what she was drawing, his previous swagger and slyness crawled into a hole and died, instead leaving him frozen with shock.

Y/N’s careful hand was meticulously adding eyelashes to a sketch of him leaning over his own textbook and writing, as he had been doing just minutes before. Picture Draco’s eyes were narrowed in gentle concentration, her handiwork capturing the intelligent glimmer in his eyes just perfectly. A piece of hair hung over his forehead, just barely tickling his brow. 

Suddenly self conscious, Draco reached his hand up to feel his forehead, and sure enough, a stray hair lay there. 

She had done a really good job. It was almost as if she had taken a picture and pressed it into the parchment, and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

The sudden rustling of his robes jolted Y/N out of her trance, and just as she was beginning to look up at Draco, he bolted off, his mind racing even faster than his feet.

♥♥♥♥

“You’ve got an admirer, Y/N!” Melanie, a fellow Ravenclaw, giggled into her ear. 

“Huh!” Y/N responded, looking up from her dinner plate.

“Yeah, look over at the Slytherin table, you’ll see.” The blonde shoved her shoulder playfully, motioning with her head. 

Y/N raked her eyes up and down the table, not seeing anyone in particular, until she stopped at the very end of it. 

Draco Malfoy’s eyes were unnervingly bore into hers from across the hall, making the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

“Are you sure he’s admiring me, Melanie?” Y/N quipped, nervous amusement creeping into her tone. “He looks like he’s going to skin me alive instead.”

Melanie shrugged, spearing a roasted carrot on her fork. 

“You never know with those Slytherins. They’re so unpredictable. One day they’re all over you, the next...” Melanie sighed, and Y/N had a feeling that her friend was no longer offering advice, rather sharing her own personal experience with one Pansy Parkinson. 

“I’m sorry, you didn’t deserve to be treated like that,” Y/N comforted, placing a hand on her shoulder. “You’re more than someone to experiment around with, and you’re gonna find your person one day!” 

They were silent for a few moments.

“Speaking of finding people,” Melanie said, “Where did Draco go?”

Y/N looked over to where he had been sitting moments before, only to see his seat vacant. The Slytherin table looked oddly empty without their token head of silvery blonde hair. 

She only had a few moments to wonder before a throat cleared behind her. Spinning around, Y/N was greeted with the sight of a rather flustered looking Draco Malfoy.

“Er... hey, Malfoy, can I help you?” Y/N cringed at how professional she sounded, like a saleswoman welcoming him into a store.

He cleared his throat again. 

“Yeah, can I talk to you for a second?” He stayed stationary, his eyes flickering nervously and refusing to meet hers. “Alone, if that’s alright?”

Y/N shot Melanie a what the fuck look and received an identical one back before standing up. 

“Sure, where do you want to go?”

♥♥♥♥

Y/N followed the Slytherin out of the Great Hall and to a quiet corridor, all the while wondering what was wrong. Draco had never spoken directly to her, and while she’d always admired him from afar, she never imagined them having a conversation. Maybe he had seen her drawing him?

She pushed the thought away. There was no chance.

“Let’s sit here.” Draco’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts as he motioned to an empty staircase. 

They sat down, leaving a healthy few inches between them. Draco fiddled with his robes as Y/N picked at her fingernail polish, justifying her actions by reminding herself that they were chipped anyways.

“What’s up?” Y/N finally asked, breaking the awkward silence. 

“Well, I, er, noticed something in class today that I wanted to speak to you about,” Draco said. 

Were his hands shaking?

Y/N had no more time to wonder as the truth of the matter hit her. Of course he had seen the sketch of him in DADA. She had thought she was sly about it, but there was no other reason for him to be talking to her.

Recognizing the realization displayed on her face, Draco leaned a bit closer.

“It was a beautiful drawing, by the way,” he informed her softly. “But I’m sure you already knew that.” 

“I’m sorry,” Y/N blurted. “I know that I should’ve asked first. That was super creepy of me to do. I swear I’m not some sort of stalker...her class is just so--”

“Boring?” Draco cut in, one eyebrow raising in amusement. “Yeah, I know. And it’s alright...I just want to know why you did it.”

Y/N froze, another blush creeping up on her already hot cheeks.

“I don’t know, I was bored, and you were in good lighting,” she lied, hoping he wouldn’t notice. 

“Why didn’t you sketch Goyle or Crabbe? They were next to the window with me,” Draco pushed, bumping her shoulder and making her suck in a quick breath. 

“I...er....I just do whatever my inner artist desires,” she responded lamely. “You just looked so focused, and your hair is really fun to draw, so...”

She stopped herself before she could let anything else slip out.

“Oh, so you’ve done it before?” he teased, an infuriatingly calm smirk forming on his lips. 

“None of your business,” she grumbled, breaking the eye contact and scooting away from him.

Draco waited a few painful seconds before shifting the same distance closer to her. 

“I don’t want to upset you,” he said truthfully. “I honestly think it’s cute.”

Y/N blushed again, resting her face in her hand to try and hide the evidence. 

“You don’t think it’s creepy?”  she asked, cautiously meeting his eyes. 

“No, how could I?” he answered, mirroring her actions. “I’m flattered, truly.” 

She allowed herself to smile shyly at him.

“Thank you for understanding, Draco, I appreciate it.” She let the words hang out in the air for a few moments before finishing. “I should really head back to my friends though, they’re going to start to get worried.” 

Draco smiled too, a rare break from his snarky facial expressions. Y/N made a mental note to recreate the exact scene in her sketchbook as well. 

“I know, me being a Slytherin and all,” he agreed. “Your friends are probably seconds away from telling Dumbledore that you’ve been kidnapped and murdered.”

“We really don’t think you’re that bad,” Y/N soothed. “They’d only assume kidnapping. They don’t think you’re cut out for murder.” 

Draco looked like he was about to argue, but he shut his mouth and grinned. 

“Well, Y/N, I’m glad I got to finally talk to you,” he said as he stood up, offering his hand to her.

“Me too,” she admitted, taking his hand. “I’ve got to be off now, but if you’d like, I can give you the sketch.” 

Draco was positively glowing. 

“I would say yes,” he began, “but then I’d lose my excuse to talk to you.”

Y/N’s heart stopped. She would’ve clasped her hands together as an anxious movement if she wasn’t clutching one of Draco’s.

“So what do you propose then?” she pressed, only stumbling over her words a little bit. 

“I hear Hogsmeade has even better lighting than Umbridge’s classroom.”

final a/n: woah this request was adorable and i’m in love with the person who sent it in tysm. also did not edit this and i don’t have any beta readers so i apologize for any glaring plot holes/mistakes. let me know what you thought of it!!

[palmett-hoes]

since the first step in achieving your goals is to state them aloud, here's a list of aftg fics/ au s that i'd like to write some day

- pre-canon fic from aaron's perspective spanning the twins' first meeting till they're drafted by the foxes and graduate high school. i'm increasingly enamored with aaron as a character as well as with an outside perspective of andrew's actions and i think it would be very interesting to look at the foundation on which their fraught relationship is built and first developed

- even more pre-canon fic. andrew's early life in foster care. yes, we all know about the most... gruesome things that were done to him, but i believe that there is plenty more that has affected and shaped him, especially in relation to my interpretation of andrew as an autistic poc. this would not be a happy fic.

- anastasia au. neil as anya, andrew as dimitri. possibly a plot amalgamation from both the animated movie and the stage show, with changes as i see fit. (no, neil is not the prince of russia). what i find most compelling about this au is the story of neil and andrew as childhood friends and then the angst of having andrew, as an adult, teaching an amnesiac neil how to act like a noble while being convinced that neil is an imposter. good shit

- art school/dance club au. the foxes attend the palmetto school of art at prestigious edgar allen university. they're considered the school's charity cases, and they are NOT friends. andrew is a studio arts major with a concentration in sculpture who works in the campus coffee shop in the mornings and frequents night clubs that employ pretty boys in the evenings. neil is attending college completely on his father's dime, PROVIDED he study what his father wants, despite his desire to study dance and music. going crazy without an outlet, neil takes a secret job as a go-go dancer. look. this may slightly possibly be a result of me having planned to party hardy this summer, then having my plans ruined by the virus :c

- 1950s High School au. the 1950s aesthetics fucking rock even though the 1950s fucking sucked. kinda wanna tackle both. plus, andrew already has that james dean bad boy fast car appeal

- an exploration of mary and nathan's relationship and history. i get that neil's parents are both super taboo and both really really awful people, but i have questions and i want to answer them

- neil never returns from baltimore. in order to keep his deals, permanently, andrew kills riko and tetsugi, and gets over 20 years in prison. when he gets out, he just wants to be alone, but it seems there's a ghost haunting him. this was conceived for MAXIMUM angst, no getting around it. i got the idea from a badacts fic and it has haunted me ever since

- post-canon sexuality exploration fic. i have a real passion for quality sex education and healthy experimentation, and neil very clearly didn't get the chance for either. yet at the end of the books he finds himself in a very intense sexual relationship. i just really want to give him the opportunity to find out how desire works for him and what he likes, on his own terms. i read a lot of fics where neil's desires seem to be completely dependent on andrew's initiaton, and while i do believe that andrew is the only person neil is attracted to and will ever be attracted to, i also want to explore how his sexuality manifests on its own. the vibe i'm going for is, uh, HornySweet (tm), but also with a lot of genuine eductional material. i want this is to be something that offers real information to its readers that may have been inaccessible for a lot of people, on topics like like sexual hygiene, maturbation, and sex toys in a non-fetishy way. this will be very very E rated, but like,, in a very earnest and goofy way because sex and sexuality is neat and cool but it's also not all serious perfect fucking. it's just,, a topic that deserves to be DISCUSSED

- mobster au. andrew, having never met aaron, takes a job for the moriyamas to track down a runaway asset. Neil. upon completion, they make andrew the butcher's apprentice, and pull neil back into the fold as a commodity rather than a person. lots of violence, lots of shady underground dealings, lots of plotting, lots of secrets.

i'm gonna put some more under the cut, ones that i don't feel as strong a drive towards right now or that i haven't thought as much about. if you (yes, YOU) like any of these, or are interested in any of these, or wanna hear more about any of these, or are even inspired to write something yourself by any of these please, PLEASE, say something in the notes, or send me a message, or an ask or anything. ANYTHING. i am stuck inside, all the time, and i am so, so lonely. i answer from hoob-gooblin

- princess bride au. come ON. princess bride is one of the most romantic AND most snarky movies of all time, and andreil literally invented love and devotion sooooooo it's a perfect match. "yes or no" vs "as you wish" kings of consent and communication and unconventional love declarations. also,, he may not be how I imagine andrew, but a young cary elwes in dramatic black pirate getup is DEFINITELY a valid andrew

- hozier au. sometimes,, i listen to an album, and imagine a fic that encompases the whole thing. nothing speaks louder to me than hozier's discography. (also, yes, i am gay). maybe a little bit inside llewyn davis. neil wanders through a small town and takes up some small jobs, but sings his heart out through twisted metaphors once a week in a hole in the wall bar staffed by a very short, dead eyed veteran

- prince and the pauper au. on a stealth recon mission in enemy territory, andrew encounters a local lord who happens to have his face. in a moment of desperation to save himself from arrest, andrew knocks the lord out and assumes his identity. he returns to the castle just in time for prince moriyama to arrive with a shifty-eyed, red-headed handservant in tow. lord aaron of columbia, meanwhile, wakes up on a ship manned by crown traitor and fugitive kevin day, calling him by a name he's never heard before, and then he's in the hands of the guerilla rebel forces that have been attacking the kingdom. i watched barbie princess and the pauper as a child and that movie fucking slaps

- little mermaid/beauty and the beast/bride of the rose beast/ladyhawke au. in a last ditch attempt to escape his father, neil trades his voice and his tail for legs and washes ashore on a small kingdom with horrible secrets. because he cannot speak, read or write, prince aaron employs neil to serve the monster in the catacombs, the prince's twin brother. the twins are under a curse that turns them into terrifying monsters, andrew by day and aaron by night. aaron's affliction is a secret, as is andrew's humanity. this is such a hodgepodge idea lol. did neil also have to be a mermaid for this to work? no. is he? hell yeah

- new york private school/twin swap au. aaron wins a scholarship to a prestigious school that will guarantee him a future, but then he relapses. convinced he just needs a little more time to get clean, he makes a deal with his volatile new brother, andrew, to stand in for him at the school just until he can his shit together. neil and ichirou moriyama have been raised together their entire lives, always under the knowledge that ichirou will inherit the family empire with nathaniel as his right hand. they hate the idea, but they have no way to escape, and now neil is being harassed by ichirou's bitchass estranged brother at their stupid, fancy private school. LISTEN, we as a fandom do NOT take enough advantage of the twin swap possibilities presented to us. pathetic

- post-canon fic where ichirou, realizing that the life of a mob boss is a lonely one, decides that he needs... a friend. however, because of the nature of his work, he can't just make friends with anyone, so he decides to make friends with neil. without consulting neil first. cue a lot of very weird, very awkward coffee dates where neil is convinced he's about to be disposed of, and ichirou just wants to know about his cats. the thing i like about ichirou is he’s a complete blank slate. i can make him a good guy, a bad guy, an ally, the Big Bad

- Kill Bill au. mary survives a bullet to the head and wakes up from a coma over a year later. with nothing left to lose, she sets out to single-handedly dismantle the wesninski circle. good thing she used to be its top assassin

- single dad andrew au. except look, look, stay with me here, okay, aaron is his son, and he's adopted nicky and kevin. LISTEN. STAY WITH ME. JUST THINK ABOUT IT. tbh the idea comes from my interpretation of the andrew/neil/kevin dynamic as distincly parental, then extending that interpretation to andrew's protection over the rest of his family.

- fashion au. andrew is a fashion designer and photographer who frequently works with allison reynolds. one day she brings around a short, twitchy assistant who looks like she just plucked him out of an alley. somehow, he becomes andrew's muse. i watch a lot of fashion competition shows

- ghibli. either howl's moving castle (andrew as sophie, neil as howl) or spirited away (?). maybe both idk

- legally blonde au. legally blonde is so good guys

[shirtlesssammy]

6x10: Caged Heat

Then:

Meet Crowley, King of Hell

Now:

Crowley is busy torturing...himself? Nope, it’s an Alpha Shifter. He informs Crowley that when he dies, he goes to Purgatory. Crowley wants more information. 

Crowley’s holding a bunch of baby shifters for leverage on information about Purgatory’s location. The shifter won’t budge so Crowley chops his head off. 

At night, the Winchesters arrive at a factory to drop off one rugaru to a couple of demons. Dean asks about Crowley but they’re not on the Need to Know list. 

Dean and Sam head back to their hide-a-way home. Dean is done dealing with demons, but Sam points out they don’t have any other plan. Dean wonders if Sam wants his soul back. Sam points out that he’s working for Crowley. Dean walks off to get some booze and when he turns to talk to Sam some more, Sam’s gone. He pulls his gun and wanders to a side room, where he finds Sam passed out on the floor. A demon comes behind Dean and knocks him out too. 

Cut to the boys tied up and Meg walking into the room. 

She’s looking for Crowley. She holds a knife to Dean’s neck for information when Sam laughs (much to Dean’s stress) and realizes that she can’t kill them. She’s running from Crowley. Sam tells her that they’ll work with her to find Crowley but they want the first stab at him before she finishes him off. 

Once free, Dean is angry and asks Sam what the heck he’s doing making a deal with the demon that killed Ellen and Jo. Sam says they need her. Ah, soulless Sam is always the pragmatist. Sam assures Dean that they will kill Meg and her minions the first chance they get-- they’re bringing insurance. 

Later, Sam is outside, praying to Castiel. Cas doesn’t appear. He then starts describing the plot to Raiders. That Biblical artifact thirsty boy is there in a heartbeat. Sam wants Cas’s help but Cas is in the middle of things upstairs. Sam threatens to kill Cas if he doesn’t help them. 

Ahem, let’s all pause at Cas’s retort and bask in the pure BAMF energy.

“Will you...boy?”

Whew. 

Anywho. 

Sam does get Cas to come back to their place.

Dean is surprised (ok, but like dude, if you really wanted him to show, why didn’t you pray? We’ve already seen him show when you pray to him. You don’t have a profound bond for nothing.)

Cas performs a locating spell, but it doesn’t work. They head to the Campbell bunker of knowledge and Samuel finds them. Dean demands to know where Crowley is. Samuel isn’t talking. Dean then asks Cas to leave (which kinda blows my season 15 brain ---they have so much more to go through to be a real family.) Dean asks Samuel what Crowley has on him. He pulls out a picture of Mary and tells them that Crowley is going to bring her back if he helps him. Dean tells him that it’s a path he doesn’t want to go down --this is how the bad guy gets them every time….AGGHh, Chuck!!! Dean also uses the word Achilles heal again (ahem.) Also, they will find another way. Samuel kicks them out.

Later, the brothers are busy working on research while Cas indulges in his favorite pastime: watching porn TV. 

He’s very confused. Dude’s been watching humanity for eons but he’s clueless AF. Dean is appalled that he’s watching porn without him in front of them. 

Samuel arrives and is disturbed by their group activities. He has the location where they drop the monsters they’ve been collecting. The monsters never leave. 

Team Free Will meet up with Meg and her gang.

Meg hopelessly flirts with Cas. Then they get down to the business of tracking Crowley. Sam demands her knife and then proceeds to kill one of her demon buddies. He was justified though and they all know it. 

Sam loads up on weaponry, while Dean spends some quality time (awkward silences) with Cas. Cas is glum. He expresses doubt about their plan to get Sam’s soul back. Cas describes the likely situation in the cage: Lucifer and Michael have been using Sam’s soul as a toy. 

Cas projects a future of madness and trauma on an ensouled Sam. Dean chooses to glibly ignore this because he has utter faith that with Cas’s help, they can do anything. (Crying noise) In the shadows, Sam overhears everything. 

Outside Crowley’s compound, the team starts their assault. The side door is unlocked, making it laughably easy to get in. The Winchesters smell a trap! The interior is lined with cells, many of them occupied by monsters - dead or alive. A djinn from an earlier episode pleads for help. Crowley’s got some kinda reach, alright!

In the distant hallways, a hellhound snarls. The camera zooms in on poor, traumatized Dean.

Everybody runs for it, and a demon falls to the hound. Meg is 100% done with the high death rate of demons in the Winchesters’ company and tries to smoke out. She opens her mouth to no avail - Crowley’s warded the place in such a way that it keeps demons firmly attached to their meatsuits. She’s in this for the (hopefully) long haul. Sam hands her Ruby’s knife so she can kill hellhounds, but Meg turns it down. The Winchesters will need that to kill Crowley. She’s got another plan. 

But first, uh, she has ANOTHER another plan?

Meg kisses Cas, her hands sliding under his trench coat in a way that we have definitely not ever pictured doing in any way. Nope. 

He spins her around and pins Meg to the wall in a way that we have definitely not ever pictured Cas doing in any way. Nope.

“I learned it from the pizza man,” Cas tells a stunned Meg. 

Meg shakes it off and hoists Cas’s blade, purloined from his coat. (What did she do, snake her arm down his sleeve? Lol) She’ll fight off the hounds with that instead. She slashes at the hound while the others move on. 

A bright light flashes suddenly, and Cas disappears just as Samuel pulls his hand away from an angel banishing sigil. Samuel, you giant bag of dicks! He betrayed the Winchesters to resurrect Mary. Crowley and his demons swan in and gain control of Sam and Dean. 

The Winchesters are tossed into cells. Meg, injured but victorious after her fight with the hounds, gets attacked by a demon possessing Christian Campbell. 

Samuel stops by Dean’s cell to explain himself, and Dean bitterly reprimands him for his betrayal. Samuel insists that Mary’s his blood, and Dean and Sam aren’t close enough to count. “What exactly are you supposed to be to me?” Samuel asks, further cementing my hatred of his character. 

Dean looks up and his MASK OF REVENGE is clearly pulled over his face. “I’ll tell you who I am. I’m the guy you never wanna see again.” CHILLS. He promises revenge on Samuel. 

Samuel walks away from his little confessional moment, and two demons arrive to drag Dean away. 

Meg, meanwhile, has been stripped of her clothing for sOMe ReaSoN. The only things covering her up are the warded bands pinning her to a torture table. I. Just. Why? Why, show? (Excuse me while I glare directly at Robert Singer from across many, many miles.) To Meg’s credit, she looks like she’s ready to do some cool murder (I’ll help). Demon!Christian starts to torture her. 

Sam chews a hole in his own arm while he waits in his cell, which is not disturbing AT ALL. DAMN, soulless Sam! Dean arrives in Crowley’s interrogation room, and it’s full of bloody bays and intestines. SO unsanitary. The demons chuck two monsters in with him. It’s to be a cage match, I see! 

When demons arrive to grab Sam, they find that they’re trapped in his cell. Sam grins with a bloody mouth at the demon trap he scrawled on the ceiling with his own blood. I mean…GROSS but mad props all the same. 

Meg continues to get tortured when Dean creeps up and kills Demon!Christian. He frees Meg and they start operation, GET CROWLEY. Sam and Dean lure Crowley in with a fire alarm and trap him in a demon trap. (This one’s spray painted, thank goodness.) 

Sam demands his soul back from Crowley, but ye olde King of Hell refuses. He can’t get into the cage to rescue Sam’s soul. Crowley questions WHY Sam would want his soul back, after all his soft marshmallowy center is surely enduring in the pit. Dean hands Ruby’s knife to Meg and she heads into the demon trap to kill Crowley. 

Crowley proves why he’s the reigning King (or at least how he’s stayed alive for so long) by tackling Meg and flinging the demon knife up into the ceiling to split apart the devil’s trap. Things are looking bad for our heroes when Cas flaps in. “Castiel,” Crowley smiles. “Haven’t seen you all season.” Cas presents a bag of bones and informs the room that he’s found Crowley’s skeleton. 

Crowley bows to the threat and lets the Winchesters go. When he admits that he really, really can’t save Sam’s soul, Cas burns the bones. It’s…DRAMATIC.

Outside, Cas confesses that the battle in Heaven is going poorly but that there’s nothing the Winchesters can do to help.

“I wish circumstances were different. Much of the time I would rather be here,” Cas confesses. CAS! Dean forgives him and Sam gives Cas one more mission before he flaps off to Heaven: destroy the monsters locked up in Crowley’s prison. Cas flaps off (and into my spin-off show, SAD ANGEL ASSASSIN). Dean promises Sam that they’ll figure out another way to get his soul, but Sam argues against any plans at restoration. He’d rather be functioning and soulless, thank you very much. Sam walks away, leaving Dean shouting fruitlessly after him.

I Learned it from the Quote-za Man:

Remember when we used to gank demons?

Okay, officially over the foreplay. Satisfy me, or I please myself

Hugs and puppies all around

I can’t believe you fell for that. That was the plot of Raiders, idiot

If the pizza man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear? 

This what you boys do, sit around watching pornos with angels?

I learned that from the pizza man

I’ll tell you who I am. I’m the guy you never wanna see again

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 

[violetsmoak]

Pieces of April [18/?]

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21099044/chapters/50202530

Summary: On the anniversary of his death, Jason’s second life takes an abrupt new turn and he’s faced with a challenge that neither Batman nor the All-Caste prepared him for.

Rating: PG-13 (rating may change later)

Author’s Note: Sorry for the wait on the latest chapter, I spent the weekend plotting some original work and it sort of took over my brain for a while. Also, this chapter has been fighting me. Mostly because I’ve been working on the big Batfam discovery moment and I can’t wait to get there, and having to slow down and write everything in between is soooooo frustrating! But hopefully we’ll get there soon lol. In the meantime, enjoy!

First Chapter

________________________________________________________________

The next morning finds Jason once again in Tim’s kitchen, this time doing a fry-up of bacon and eggs. He’d been surprised to find either of those things in Tim’s fridge, having appeared as if by magic.

(Jason suspects Tim gets his groceries delivered instead of shopping like a normal person; he’s not going to complain, though, since food is food.)

From her carrier’s usual perch on the kitchen island, Luisa is frowning at him—or at least frowning at his general direction—in disapproval like a miniature, squishy Winston Churchill.

“What?” he asks her, feeling oddly judged. “You don’t like my fryin' technique?” She sticks her tongue out, and yawns, easing back in her carrier. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

He’d probably shit his pants if she actually spoke back, but he’s seen stranger things in his life.

Suddenly, there’s a sharp, explosive bang from outside as a car backfires, and Luisa jolts, eyes going wide in shock before she starts shrieking.

“Crap,” Jason grunts, dropping the spatula and hurrying over to pick up the startled baby. Lifting her up, he starts rocking her back and forth, trying to shush her and wincing as the crying just gets louder.

How does such a little thing make such a big noise?

Still trying to calm her, he goes to pick the spatula up off the floor to toss in the sink and glances around for another. Luisa keeps crying, little fists beating ineffectually at him, and no matter what position he holds her in she refuses to let up.

“I know you’ve never heard something that loud before, but don’t you think this is an overreaction?” he mutters, glancing desperately around for the cape Tim was using as a carrier the other day. It’s nowhere within range, and so he turns off the stove and shoves aside the pan to ensure the bacon doesn’t burn while he deals with the baby complication.

As he searches, rocking and shushing Luisa as he goes, he’s getting generally more frustrated at not being able to get her to stop wailing. He’s on the verge of giving up and going to wake Tim—which is embarrassing on so many levels—when he remembers what the kid told him yesterday about heartbeat and skin-to-skin contact.

Making a quick decision, he places the squalling infant on the couch for an instant while he shrugs out of his shirt. Then, ignoring the sense of awkwardness he picks her up to hold against his bare chest, cradling her head in support as he continues to rock subtly, bouncing somewhat on the balls of his feet.

Luisa’s still wailing, mushing her face into his chest almost in protest, and his ears are beginning to ring. But slowly, as the minutes creep by, the sound morphs into weak fussing. Her little ear settles against a spot near his breastbone, right over his heart, and that sound wanes as well.

There’s a sniffle, a wet almost-hiccup in her breathing, and then she goes silent and calm again.

Hey, look at that.

Jason actually managed to calm her down himself, instead of calling for help or putting her down to yell until she tired herself out. He’s not sure why he feels a stab of pride in that, but he decides it doesn’t matter in the face of the now silent baby.

He keeps hold of her until her breathing evens out and she passes out and then returns to the kitchen and the carrier.

Once she’s settled again, he notices that he’s being watched, and glances up to see Tim, ruffled and still blinking sleep out of his eyes even as he studies the scene in front of him.

Eyes raking up Jason’s form, he opens his mouth to say something, frowns to himself and shakes his head.

“I need coffee,” he mumbles at last and slouches into the kitchen to turn on the Keurig. While waiting for it to brew, he turns back to Jason, leaning against the counter and tilts his head to one side. “I didn’t know you had tattoos.”

Jason looks down his front at the All-Caste markings no longer hidden by the baby’s form.

They’re not tattoos. At least, not exactly.

But the real story’s too complicated and not something he wants to get back to the Bats, so he just shrugs and says, “I don’t exactly put out announcements in the Family newsletter.”

Tim nods, ceding the point.

“So, what do they mean?” he asks as his coffee finishes brewing.

“None of your damn business. Don’t you have work?”

The younger man raises an eyebrow. “It’s Saturday?”

Right. Weekends are a thing.

“I do have some online classes to log on for later, though,” Tim goes on. “But I don’t really have to dress up in a suit for that.” He smirks. “I’m not Damian.”

“I dunno—you’re both pint-sized pains in my ass,” Jason retorts, trying to hide his surprise that Tim is still in school. He thought he’d dropped out when Bruce went missing in the timestream; he didn’t realize the guy was still doing that.

God, he’s doing school on top of everything else? How is this kid still alive?

“I’m still taller than he is,” Tim hedges, with a trace of sulk in his voice.

Heh. Think we’ve hit a sore point there.

But he chooses not to pursue it; better for him if Tim’s in a good mood.

“I’m goin' out again today,” he informs him, trying not to grit his teeth at the effort it takes not to make it sound like a question. He doesn’t need permission, damn it! “Have a little conversation with Isabel’s ex, for all the good it’ll do.”

“I figured as much,” Tim replies, unbothered. He sips at his coffee. “Isa and I will be fine. Besides, when I’m done my classwork, I’ve got a lead I want to pursue. I might have tracked down some of Isabel’s blood relatives.”

Jason pauses, ears perking up. “Seriously?”

“I think so. Try not to get your hopes up, though.” He frowns then, tilting his head to one side. “You might want to do something about that before you go meeting with anyone.”  

He makes a circular motion around his own forehead.

Nonplussed, Jason wanders toward the mantlepiece and the mirror above it, making a noise of understanding when he realizes what Tim was pointing out.

“Noted,” he agrees, flicking at his hair.

The problem with dying his hair black is the need to touch it up every six weeks; the roots of his natural red coloring start to peek through around then, along with the thick white streak that sprouts from just above the scar in his hairline. The latter doesn’t hold the color for very long, fading to a washed-out gray-white within a few washes.

The upkeep is a pain in the ass, but black hair is a lot less memorable in his line of work, a lesson he learned quickly as both Robin and during his League training.

Once Tim’s settled into his temporary workstation at the kitchen table, with Luisa snoozing within easy reach, Jason takes off.

Like the day before, he commandeers one of Tim’s bikes and heads out to pharmacy near one of his safehouses in Midtown. He figures it’s best to keep any kind of chemical smell far away from the baby, and besides he kind of wants to avoid Tim walking in on the dyeing process. He needs to do his eyebrows, and if the younger man were to make a comment, Jason would have to punch him—which seems a poor reward for someone helping him out right now.

Once he’s applied the dye and is waiting for it to set, he uses the laptop in his bolt hole to remotely access the Cave systems again and brings up the phone records between Isabel and her group of friends, including Jonathan Sutter.

It feels morbid and invasive, but he needs a better sense of who these people are and how to approach them. The texts between her and her friends are the usual thing you’d expect from a group of twenty-somethings making plans or bitching about work. As for the exchanges between her and Sutter, there aren’t that many; it seems their relationship was mostly in person or by phone.

Jason’s relieved about that because he’s not sure he could stomach reading his dead ex-girlfriend’s sexting her boyfriend.

Because I don’t feel creepy enough about this as it is…

He finds reference to a few events they attended together—restaurant dinner, a trip to the opera, a Broadway play—

“Wow, this guy was predictable,” Jason mutters to himself before he finds something interesting.

Sutter’s accounting firm did work on a huge contract with WE the year before, resulting in invitations to one of their charity events. Sutter evidently invited Isabel to go with him, which could provide a good backstory for Jason.

He’s been to those things before, both under protest and undercover, and they all go down the same way. It’s an easy cover for what he needs.

Closing the laptop, he goes to wash the last of the dye off and then showers for good measure. He actually takes more than ten minutes for once, since he’s alone and doesn’t need to keep his ear out for a crying baby. Even when he knows Tim is watching her, he can’t help waiting for something bad to happen.

It’s a bit irritating, actually; he inherited all the worries a new parent might feel about screwing up their kid, and yet none of the connection. It’s not just because he’s holding himself back from it either; he wonders if he had known about the baby—if he and Isabel had been involved during her pregnancy—if he would feel more of a bond to Luisa.

“No point wonderin',” he mutters to himself as he gets out of the shower and towels off. He learned a long time ago that speculating over the ‘what-if’s’ of the past would just lead him down a dark pit of self-pity.

On a whim, he grabs the make-up and prosthetic’s kit from beneath the sink and sets about making himself a disguise. He doesn’t usually bother with disguises anymore—those undercover gigs with Bruce seem far too long ago—but since he’s just testing the waters, he doesn’t want to be too recognizable.

The end result is a passable imitation of the infamous Matches Malone look Bruce cultivated, though Jason makes an effort to look a lot more kempt, before setting out once more.

The cameras he left watching Sutter’s place, as well as the tracker on his car, put him at a strip-mall not far from his home. Upon investigation, Jason finds himself standing in front of a high-priced vegan grocery.

“Seriously?” Jason mutters to himself, wrinkling his nose in disgust. The store isn’t even one of the legit wholesale places filled with locally sourced products, but one of the trendy boutiques, stocked with items that are three times more expensive just to cover the import costs and the brand name.

He loiters around the shelves, pretending to be examining the dozens of different types of Norwegian water while keeping an eye out for his target.

Sutter appears at the head of the aisle moments later, pushing a cart and followed by a young brunette. Younger than him, at least; Sutter’s about thirty, which puts the woman he’s with at about ten years younger.

She says something to him, clearly cheerful and excited, and Sutter replies in kind, accepting whatever package she puts in the cart. She leans up to peck him on the cheek, and then practically bounces away. The minute she’s gone, Sutter’s expression becomes long-suffering. He checks his phone with an air of impatience.

So he’s not actually into his stuff, but faking it for her.

It’s possible that’s just him attempting to be a supportive boyfriend, Jason supposes. But it also suggests the decision-maker in the relationship is the girlfriend, which could be a problem.

Only one way to find out.

He makes a production of turning just as Sutter passes him, and then affects a double-take at seeing him for the first time.

“Hey, I know you!” he declares, earning a look of surprise, followed by the guy looking around with a ‘who me?’ kind of expression. Jason pretends not to see it. “Johnny—John? Sutter, right?”

The man stares at him, apprehensive. “Yes? Do I know you?”

“You don’t remember?” Jason says, affecting an amused chuckle. “Heh. Guess you wouldn’t, I look a lot spiffier in a tux.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t—"

“Peter Malone, Locke Insurance? We met at the WE charity ball last March.” Sutter continues to look wary. “You were there with that knockout—whatshername…Izzy? Annabelle?”

“Isabel?” Sutter supplies, expression slowly morphing from wary to uncomfortable. The expression of someone worried he’s about to be caught out for not remembering a name.

“Right! Yes, her—damn, she was a looker.”

“Yeah…sorry, but I don’t really remember you,” Sutter says, expression clearing, and adopting an apologetic grimace. “But there were a lot of hands to shake that night, so...”

“Don’t I know it,” Jason agrees. “I left with about six new clients that night. Pretty good for a charity event, eh?” He doesn’t give Sutter a chance to reply. “So, you still with her?”

“What?”

“Isabel—hot blond? Legs up to here?”

Sutter’s tone becomes clipped again. “No.”

Jason gives an exaggerated whistle. “Damn shame…damn shame. You two looked like you were having fun.”

“Yeah, well…” Sutter gives a tight smile, eyes flicking away like he’s looking for an exit. “Things don’t always work out.”

“You know if she’s still single now?” Jason prompts, laying on the smarm. “Think you could set us up?”

“I think you’re the last person she wants anything to do with right now,” Sutter replies coolly. “Now, if you excuse me—”

“What’s that supposed to mean? Don’t think she’d be into me? Everyone wants a piece of this.”

“Hope you like kids then,” the man mutters as he edges away.

Jason affects a wide-eyed gaze. “She’s got kids? Damn, she doesn’t look the type.”

He makes it sound like some kind of disease, earning a snort of agreement from Sutter, who says, “I thought so too.”

There’s a trace of bitterness there, one Jason recognizes intimately. He had foster parents that looked and sounded the same. Still, he presses on, pretending to be clueless at the cues the other man is trying to give him to end the conversation.

“Not a fan of the rugrats?”

“Not especially,” Sutter replies tightly. “And raising someone else’s kid? When you work the hours I do? I’ve got a career, my company’s got me flying from the East Coast to the West Coast every couple of weeks, my family’s already complicated—it’d be hard enough raising my own kid, let alone someone else’s.” He looks up as the blond from earlier appears, with some overpriced wafer crackers. “Anyway, nice catching up with you. See you around, I guess.”

He practically takes off at a run.

“Yeah, take it easy,” Jason replies dully. In three sentences, he’s learned everything he needed to know about the guy’s fitness as a parent.

This guy’s a hard ‘no’ then.

Jason leaves the store, mood dark. He takes a few hours to wander around Crime Alley and soak up the comings and goings without anyone recognizing him, before turning to Tim’s apartment via the underground entrance.

“Looks like it didn’t go too well,” Tim says when he sees him. He’s in the process of changing Luisa, who is making noises of disapproval. She doesn’t like to be wet, but she also doesn’t like being cold, so getting changed appears to be her least favorite part of the day.  

“He doesn’t want to be involved,” Jason says, not wanting to go into detail. “Which is what we figured would be the case.”

“Well, now you know for sure.”

“All I’m sure about is people suck.”

“So what’s the next step?”

“I’ve got a list of Isabel’s friends to contact. If they seem legit, I’ll see about figurin' out if they want to step up in honor of Isabel’s memory.”

He makes a face at that, knowing how it sounds, but being unable to think up any other alternative.

“I could come along,” Tim offers.

“No,” Jason says immediately. “People see you and they see dollar signs. Either for sellin' the story to the press or pretendin' their decent because they’ll think the kid means you bankrollin' them for the next eighteen years.”

“Point,” Tim says, and there’s a clench of his jaw that makes Jason think that scenario resonated with him personally for some reason. “I still don’t think you should go alone. You need someone along to soften your image, so you don’t come off as a creep.”

“I can be soft if I want to be,” Jason protests, offended.

“I have…no idea how to respond to that that won’t sound like Dick,” Tim tells him. “So I won’t.”

“Magnanimous of you."

“Here’s an idea—call Safiya. Ask if she’ll come with. She might even have met some of these people before.”

“Good point.” Jason makes a mental note to call her later, and wanders into the kitchen.

Noticing that other than the various plastic bottles and hastily closed formula containers there's no sign of plates or take-out, Jason determines Tim probably hasn’t made anything for dinner or even just for himself.

Assuming he even knows how to cook.

He opens the door to the fridge, and just stands there for a long moment, before shaking his head and closing it again when nothing immediately appeals to him.

Jason’s not entirely sure what he wants right now, his stomach growling in complaint for food having to compete with a pervading nausea at the idea of a heavy meal. He ends up cutting up a plate of fruit to tide him over until he can make a decision and wanders over to the space in the living room where Tim is working. Safiya is now nowhere in sight, but the baby monitor is on, the green lights lighting up and fading in tandem with distant sound of breathing.

“She actually let me put her down,” Tim explains when he notices where Jason’s looking.

“You’re the favorite,” Jason retorts, not sure why the idea doesn’t sit well with him. He supposes it’s left over from years of seeing Tim as the replacement everyone preferred to him. Rather than get trapped in that dark line of thinking, he offers the younger man his plate. “Any luck tracking down Luisa’s family?”

Tim absently accepts a few wedges of apple. “Yes and no.”

“What the hell does that mean?” Jason asks, throwing himself onto the couch. There’s a groan under his weight, which earns a pissy look from Tim, but the latter doesn’t address it.

“Isabel never told you much about her extended family, right?”

“Beyond the fact that they exist somewhere, not really. We didn’t really talk families, for obvious reasons.”

“Right.”

“She said she and her parents left Bogota before she was two, and if she met anyone before then she can’t remember.”

“Well, it turns out there’s a reason for that,” Tim says and slides his tablet over to Jason. When he picks it up, it takes a minute for his eyes to register the information Tim’s hunted up. “Her parents were fleeing Columbia to get away from them. It seems the Ardila family is in deep with the Medellin cartel there.”

“No shit,” Jason says, eyes wide.

This may actually explain Isabel’s lack of panicking in the face of aliens and mobsters…

“Isabel’s parents sought asylum in the US and eventually qualified for citizenship.”

“How’d they manage that if they were from a crime family?”

“My guess? Being good at bending the truth and having excellent forged documents.”

“Either way, that’s another option off the table,” Jason sighs, letting his head fall back on the couch in exasperation.

Tim hums in agreement and for a few moments, they simply sit in silence against the sense of defeat.

It’s not until the baby monitor suddenly gives a sudden series of noise—bursts of what at first sounds like static, but they then realize are tiny sneezes—that either of them moves again.

“I should check her,” Tim says, but Jason holds up a hand to stop him.

They listen a few moments longer, hear a bit of grumbling across the monitor, and then there’s only the sound of breathing.

“If you’re going to go running every time she sneezes or coughs, you’re going to give her a complex,” Jason informs him.

Tim raises an eyebrow. “Says the guy who was worried she had yellow fever.”

“I wasn’t worried, I was…concerned.”

“Now you sound like Bruce.”

“Take that back, Replacement.”

They glare at each other, but there’s little heat in it. At last, Tim rolls his eyes and looks away.

“On a somewhat related note—” Tim reaches for a file folder and takes out a piece of paper with a table on it, which Jason immediately recognizes as a schedule. Various duties have been written into the cells—feeding, changing, future bath times.

“You actually made one,” Jason says, somewhat disbelieving.

“Of course I made one. This last week, we’ve just been reacting to everything. We can’t keep going like that, and I don’t know about you, but I’m getting tired of the petty arguments about who does what.”

“Petty,” Jason repeats tonelessly.

“Petty,” Tim agrees. “As you can see here, these are the times when we might consider calling for outside help. I checked with Safiya about what days she’s conditionally available, and even Tam—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa—Tam agreed?”

“Well, she agreed for emergencies,” Tim allows. “Like, if it’s raining Joker toxin from the sky kind of emergencies.”

Jason scowls. “Don’t tempt fate with that shit.”

“You know what I mean. If there’s something big going on, she said she’ll cover for us. Since it’s all temporary, and all.”

“Right…” Jason agrees faintly, staring at the blinking lights of the baby monitor. “Temporary…”

The rest of what Tim's saying fades to background noise, as his thoughts are overwhelmed with a sudden worry:

What if we don't find anyone worth taking her?

⁂⁂⁂

Your feedback matters! I want to know what you think of my story, so feel free to leave kudos, a comment or as many of these emojis as you want and let me know how you feel!

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[ninety6tears]

Disorganized thoughts on Dublin Murders ep1 & ep2, here we go (spoilers probably for stuff I know from the books)

Overall, so far there’s some of those forced/heavy-handed moments I feared in an adaptation of a series written with a lot of baited subtext, but that’s at least half to be expected from an adaptation that isn’t relying on a fuck-ton of voiceover and stuff and so far I think most of it would work for me if I wasn’t reflexively comparing it to the text.

One of the worst things about adaptations is knowing that once I watch them my own closely guarded imagining of what the characters look like will be lost forever whether I like it or not. In this case I could get used to it. Like, RIP Cassie’s cute hair but these two have qualities that feel a lot like I pictured them, and there is some kind of chemistry between them. 

Cassie isn’t quite book!Cassie--I don’t see her doing cartwheels on the coast, she doesn’t cheerfully deflect awkwardness in the same way, she laughs less--but the story jumps into a tone that doesn’t allow for as much of that, maybe? And they do enough to establish that Rob and Cassie are close friends as well as partners--I thought it was nice to tell us that Cassie knows about Knocknaree just from how she reacts to the assignment (her concerned face, omg, Rob would never have described that).

I read a review before watching any of the series that praised Phelps for making Cassie more feminist as if In The Woods was some irrelevant relic of pre-#MeToo as far as writing women goes, and Christ, I resent the idea that a character not taking it upon herself to constantly teach men and realistically turning the other cheek when her boss says sexist shit (especially when you know Tana French has also written women who seem less low-key) overshadows her complexity as a tough female character. But whatever that was referring to doesn’t seem too forced in the show, and Cassie and Rob’s long game with dropping hints around O’Kelly about Cassie’s incompetence is funny, actually impressively subtle, and captures that feel from the book of her not giving an actual shit what men like him think as long as her partner has her back and knows what she’s capable of.

One review said: “Her friendship with Rob, one of perpetual banter and teasing in the source material is a little more mature and reserved here; certainly not lacking in evident closeness, but with warmth expressed more through shared smiles and easy silences than lengthy scenes of in-jokes.” True and kinda what I expected. I miss the like, studenty vibe of them constantly being idiots at her tiny flat eating cheap food and drinking whisky. But the way they work professionally is fire; they nail the way the two look at each other from across a room and can have an entire exchange in a couple glances.

And the thing is they clearly can’t be having their life-partner sleepovers every other night because Cassie has a love life (!) with Sam, which is different, BECAAUUSE

1) BZUH, I exclaim to myself when this this is revealed, IS SHE GOING TO CHEAT ON HIM WITH ROB??

2) Do I care if she cheats on him with Rob? (nope not at all I’m garbage)

3) “I’ve told you things that nobody knows, not even Sam”?!?!?! I struck my mattress with my fist, ARE YOU KIDDING ME, this AU is totally in character.

I didn’t know or remember that Quigley was gonna be in the series which made it funny how immediately I knew that was him. "I’ve got a partner,” lol, Rob hates him so much. I already wish there was less of him though.

I don’t really buy that Rob’s involvement in a disappearance case would have held him back from getting a job in law enforcement (??), and it’s not like he legally changed his name and citizenship, but if it did make a difference, background checks would have shook some of that shit out for sure. The problem is that French glazed over that plot hole by making the Knocknaree case largely almost forgotten and they’re not doing that here. I do kinda like the clincher they’re building differently where Cassie and Rob actually decided they can’t take the case but end up forced to ride it out. (Especially how Rob ~acknowledges her loyalty and ~tenderly touches her arm during that scene when they realize they’re gonna have to just keep lying out their asses for each other.)

FRANK THO. Okay, I really wish I hadn’t caught the casting news for Mackey because I would have been like WHAT IS THIS STALKER SUBPLOT and laughed really hard at the reveal. Also, interested to see if they go into Cassie’s history with the rape threat guy cause I couldn’t help thinking what book!Cassie would have done if she thought she was being creeped on. But also like, tell your partner about this shit, hon. I love that she’s just handling it and figuring it out on her own and KNOWS someone’s been at her place cause she’s Cassie (parenthetically I’ve gotten stabbed undercover) Maddox. 

Still bitter that Frank isn’t hot.

@cosetteferaud  since you asked ; )

[atamascolily]

lily liveblogs “terminator: dark fate”, part four

In which Sarah Connor suffers for the cause in the most ironic way possible.

(one, two, three)

I've already waxed poetic elsewhere about the "My entire body is a weapon"/ "Save it for the ladies" exchange, but let's just say the Rev-9's claim of "Metal hip - two tours in Afghanistan" is a) a great manipulation, and b) might even be true - certainly the part about the metal hip is! And the "thank you for your service," / letting him pass through is just... the irony... I can't even...

(and also, this MAKES SENSE when you realize that Legion was designed to process people and manipulate/control them and THAT'S why he's so good at it).

Sarah Connor gets picked up by a smarmy dude named Officer Rigby. "You belong in your own private cage," he tells her. He's probably going to die soon, and we are not supposed to be sorry about it. (And meanwhile, some random dude yells in the background, "I want to go, too!" No, you don't. Trust me.)

Grace does not believe in bureaucratic bullshit. And she won't accept "detainees" instead of "prisoners". YASS. At least there's fresh meds for her.

Oh! I just realized why she steals the guy's clothes.. it's because nothing else would fit her. It's tough being so tall.

Grace pulls the fire alarm and Sarah recognizes an opening when she sees one and manages to kick Rigby in the groin and take him and both her guards down with both hands in cuffs behind her back. LEGEND. Kyle Reese would be so proud of her, especially since he pulled the same stunt back in T1 in the police station sequence. 

Grace starts opening doors and people rush to get out, oh please let this not be a slaughter.

The dude who was with them (Flacco?) slams the door into the Terminator's face and he gets punched into a wall for his trouble. I hope he survived...

The Rev-9 jumps UP into the rafters, holy shit, and is scrabbling over the metal fence like the Rev-7s in the future scene, and it's so a) predatory and b) so feral and inhuman... and that guard who sassed Dani looks terrified as hell as she faces him down.. and gets slashed for her troubles.

Slaughter ensues, but only people in official uniforms thus far... Every one of them is mobbing the Rev-9 and just getting stabbed.

Oh, good, they found a helicopter. Someone gets punched out the door after them, and you think it's the REv-9 who did it, but it's actually Sarah! YASS. Dani wants to wait for her and Grace wants to get away. Dani doesn't want to leave Sarah (hey, callbacks to earlier!) and jumps out of the helicopter with the gun as the REV-9 runs at her. Dani starts shooting the REV-9 which is very cathartic for her, but Sarah tackles her and pulls her into the helicopter. The REV-9 jumps for it, but misses, and falls the ground and just looks... annoyed despite having no expression whatsoever.

The REV-9's accent with the sheriffs is interesting. There's the same "good ol' boy" attitude as "That's a nice bike" in T2 and the same cut back to our heroes that speaks volumes.

Cut to a forest in Texas. I have no idea if this is botanically accurate or not because I have no experience with Texas flora. But there are pine trees and maple trees, I can tell you that much.

I like how Sarah and Grace are ready to draw when they knock on the door of this ordinary-looking house in the woods, and Dani just looks at them like they're crazy.

Hey, and it's the same music as in the prologue, as Sarah recognizes the Terminator! He says her name and she raises her gun to shoot him except that Grace intervenes and she hits the ceiling.

“My name is Sarah Connor, you killed my son, prepare to die...” No, okay, she doesn’t actually say that, but I’m gonna do it for her.

Sarah stalks off when they won't let her shoot the Terminator. Dani and Grace exchange a look, and Dani goes after Sarah while Grace deals with Carl (his nom de... paix, I guess). They have the ... "So you're a cyborg, too?" talk, which goes about as well as you can expect.

Poor Sarah looks so broken sitting outside alone. Dani uses her people skills to rally her. Sarah's admission that she never took photos of John is a) heartbreaking, and b) good tactics, especially given how previous Terminators used photos, and how the REV-9 uses facial recognition software.

Sarah's sarcasm as she contemplates Carl's family photos is biting and hilarious and poignant especially given what she just said to Dani (and how a photograph was what brought Kyle to her in the first place). MY HEART.

We are meant to parallel Carl's treatment of Alicia and Mateo with Sarah and John, and Sarah and Carl in "Without purpose, we are nothing". The irony that Carl understands Sarah in this way, and that Sarah has been getting her raison d’etre from a Terminator the whole time... way to lay on the pain, writers!

I've heard a lot of critique of this film claiming that Terminators just wouldn't act like Carl, and I think that's not accurate. What exactly do people think a Terminator WOULD do after they finished their mission instad? It's not like Skynet or Legion or whatever gave them any other programming, and we know from T2 they can't self-terminate. So what are they supposed to do, just stand there??

Even though Carl doesn't have his chip removed the way the T-800 in T2 did, Terminators are very accomplished at learning and mimicking humans. They are adaptable. And I think the filmmakers are right that the T-800 would try to find a new mission--paralleling the old one--to give his life purpose. I think this is a very plausible plot device, and also a great opportunity for irony and parallels, which this franchise thrives on and I personally love.

(There's great fic from Carl's POV on A03 by Tyellas that expands on this that I LOVE, so you should all go read it RIGHT NOW.)

I also LOVE the growing parallels not only between Sarah and Carl, but Carl and Grace that the film keeps emphasizing YASSS.

Sarah is NOT PLEASED to learn she's been manipulated the whole time by the robot who killed her son.Understatement of the year. I was wondering when she was going to shoot him!

"Do you believe in fate, Sarah?" OW, MY HEART.

Oh. Interesting. So when Sarah destroyed Skynet, she released Carl from his programming, thus allowing him to learn?? Okay, I'll buy it. Which means that Carl was released at the same time as the other Terminators in all three films (though we get into the simultaneity problem, but that's a headache for another time). It's plausible if I don't think too hard about it, so I'll buy it. I wish people would stop calling plot elements they don't like/agree with "plot holes". That's... not what it means.

[so who is sending the other terminators? Are they from Legion or Skynet? what is their purpose? Since Sarah is a wanted woman in America, it makes sense if she was killing Terminators in Mexico, which makes me wonder if she's been protecting Dani until now???) I have a feeling the film will not answer this question.]

There's a dog curled up at Carl's feet when they cut to the next scene. This is NOT a plot hole, as some people have claimed. This is actually a clue that Carl IS as human as he claims to be... i.e, he seems to have mastered whatever subtle cues that makes the dog recognize him as human, and not a foreign predator. Obviously, YMMV, but I don't see it as a plot hole.

The secret storage armory is de riguer for a Terminator film, but I also enjoy the deadpan social commentary about human barbarism coming from a reformed murderbot. "And also, this is Texas." He's definitely living in the right state for that.

Wow. The training lesson at the shooting range was everything I could have hoped for. I love Sarah's wry smile as the watermelons explode.

OF COURSE SARAH CONNOR "KNOWS A GUY" with an EMP, lol...

Kudos to Carl for getting his family out of the way and for preparing him for this day. But it's clear he won't be back.

... how about that leather jacket and sunglasses? because he's about to start being way less human and way more machine.

oHHHHH he leaves the sunglasses behind, I was NOT expecting that. NICE WORK.

hello rev-9 smashing the family photographs, that's not symbolic of anything at all.

Hey, did they take all the guns with them or is the REv-9 going to use them against their owner?? was leaving the photo of the van on the fridge intentional? Too early to tell! Either way, ironic given Sarah's caution with photos earlier!

Sarah's withering expression as Carl lectures about interior design is GOLDEN.

I now want a road trip movie about this dysfunctional found family. I cannot believe they are only together for less than 24 hours. Thank goodness for fic.

"I don't commit treason for just anybody," is such a great line and one of my favorites in this film.  

Of course the EMP is probably going to disable/take out Carl AND Grace AND the Rev-9 because that's just how this kind of movie works, but there you go.

Sarah telling Carl to shut the fuck up is GOLDEN, they work so well together. Mommy and Daddy, indeed.

AHHH, the major bringing them the EMP on the sly gets shot. It's tough being a minor character in these films. Dani pulls him into the van but I can't help but notice in that position he's a human shield.

Okay, so leaving photos on the fridge was NOT intentional... maybe Sarah should have had an op-sec chat with Carl about that??

Oh, hey, the flesh-like bit of the REV-9 jumped out of the copter while the chassis keeps flying. That's a neat trick. And the moment where the fleshy bit jumps in and they merge is always cool.

Okay, so they're going to the air base. I guess another fight is in order. Ah, this is where the planes are coming in. Apparently, Grace is piloting. That answers my question from the trailer.

They just run the van right up the ramp and the Major is there to take awkward questions. "District contractors" indeed. I hope he'll survive this movie, but I have my doubts. Oh, he's not going with them - I don't know if that increases his chances or not. WHAT THE HELL KIND OF RELATIONSHIP DO HE AND SARAH HAVE ANYWAY??

They didn't bother to close up the back before taking off??? Wow. Okay, I guess that works...

Carl uses himself as a shield for Sarah, which just makes her mad...

The Rev-9 flips out of the burning helicopter onto the ramp, and Carl just takes him down and shoots him. It doesn't take, but it's pretty glorious. SARAH AND DANI ROLL THE VAN OVER HIM OH MY GOD.

Needless to say, I'm pretty sure the Rev-9 will be back... in an EVEN BIGGER PLANE.

Oh, so the EMP is dead...? Maybe they can improvise something.

Flasback! Dani beats the punks that are harassing Grace and talks the last guy into not shooting her because "this is what Legion wants us to do". FUCK YEAH.

"FUCK FATE" is basically the motto of this series (and a slightly more concise, if vulgar, reframing of "no fate but what we make for ourselves" or "no fate" in T2).

OH MY GOD THAT LOOK ON FUTURE!DANI'S FACE WHEN SHE RECOGNIZES GRACE...

"You are the future" - okay, this is very moving and dramatic, but I feel like Grace should have mentioned this back on the TRAIN why the fuck did she wait this long.

"You're John..." Sarah gasps... and just adopted a kid. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, Y'ALL. Carl was right, she needs a purpose or else she’s just going to self-destruct.

YESSSSS, I love it when movies answer my questions: apparently future!Dani told Grace not to mention it earlier, because younger!Dani wouldn't be able to handle it. Ah, the ouroboros of causality... I'll buy it, but I still think the film would have been stronger if they had had this conversation earlier on the train.

plane vs. plane hijinks ensue. Grace puts the ship on autopilot so she can actually do stuff. There's a lot of flailing as the ship starts to explode. The REv-9 climbs aboard and uses his oozy bits to rip all the flesh off Carl's hand. There's a humvee with a parachute, but the way the scene is laid out, it's kinda convolunted, but okay.. ... They bust the door open so the humvee can drop out. Carl pins the chassis to the plane but the oozy bits escape and go running free towards them. The plane explodes seconds after the humvee pulls free and parachutes to the ground.... okay.

Sarah Connor's "Aw, fuck," as they land on the hydroelectric dam is GOLDEN.

[myrtlebroadbelt]

Misfits rewatch - S01E01

I decided to start an in-order, complete (through Season 2, lol) Misfits rewatch, instead of just watching random episodes/scenes like I usually do. Observations, favorite moments, and unanswered questions below.

How is Nathan’s jumpsuit already filthy? He just got it five minutes ago.

Poor Tony. He’s just that “dealing with you is like herding cats” troubled bird come to life.

It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that the opening titles show each of their powers. (I think I saw someone point out that Nathan’s black dog is a portent of death.)

“I was done for eating some pick ‘n’ mix.” Reader, I fell in love.

One of these days I’m gonna rank Kelly’s hairstyles. I’m definitely a fan of the teased pony on day 1.

On a related note, can I please have a 40-minute “Kelly Bailey Scrapes Her Hair Back” ASMR video? I love that sound! I’m a weirdo!

Totally random, but did anyone else notice Gary as an X-wing pilot in the new Star Wars movie?!

What happened to Keith the dog? Did he run off with the poodle next door? Kinda sucks that the show never explored how Kelly can basically talk to animals.

I’m anti-Louise. Don’t @ me.

As someone who was pretty shy and awkward growing up, Simon trying to get everyone’s attention in the locker room is a Mood.

I should also rank Alisha’s nail polish colors. Digging the blue.

Pretty sure Kelly is the only main character whose name is mentioned in the first episode. That’s kinda weird, right?

“Her mum’ll feel it? How does that work?” Underrated line.

Missing scene I want to see: the ASBO Five exchanging phone numbers.

Also would like to see them cleaning up all that blood and fixing the broken stall door and the window Tony jumped through.

The “Lonely Soul” sequence remains excellent.

Living for Kelly’s almost imperceptible “Nathan no” headshake before he launches into his Tony/Gary smutfic.

Overall, this is one of my favorite episodes. It does a nice job introducing the characters and setting up the story, and I’m always a fan of the whole group working together. There are some definite plot holes, but part of the show’s charm for me is what a hot mess it is.

[peterstanslizzie]

Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.22 (The Untitled Stan Jansen Project)

Miranda just broke one of the ultimate #bestfriendcodes i.e. Do Not Spill Each Other’s Secrets! Especially in front of a camera...smh

- Stan Jansen, a famous movie director is at Hillridge Junior High to film a documentary on the lives of the students there. While Lizzie and Miranda are thrilled about it, Gordo feels the opposite because he thinks that Stan will most probably put a spotlight on just the popular kids like Ethan and Kate.

- Moreover, Gordo prefers to be behind the camera instead of being the one on camera. For some reason, Gordo catches the attention of Stan and pulls him aside to introduce himself. Stan tells Gordo he loves his refreshing energy and wants to “keep an eye on him”; I still don’t understand why he’s drawn to Gordo.

The height difference between the two is insane

Gordo Throws Shade

- The next morning, Lizzie isn’t happy about what she’s wearing for school and wants to change outfits for the third time. Well, you know what they say; Third time’s the charm. 

I love Miranda’s shirt; It’s very punk rock and futuristic looking. 

- In school, Stan finds Gordo and refers to him as his “leading man”. Okay but when Animated Lizzie said that Gordo is one of these three attributes, ‘tall’, ‘dark’ and ‘handsome’, which one was she talking about? Was it ‘dark’ or ‘handsome’. Gordo is certainly not tall and doesn’t ‘dark’ mean tanned? So, it has to be handsome right? If so, that’s so cute how she thinks Gordo is handsome.

- Anyways, Stan wants Gordo to add a little drama to his performance in front of the camera. So when Kate comes into the frame and asks Gordo if he could walk her to class (which is obviously not what happens in real life), he throws her the ultimate shade and tells her to her face how he really thinks about her and it’s not good...

I kinda feel bad for Kate 

- Unexpectedly, Kate didn’t clap back at Gordo and I guess it’s because they’re on camera and she eventually leaves. Yikes! I mean, Gordo is right but he didn’t need to be that honest, especially when the cameras are rolling. 

- Well, Stan is very happy with Gordo’s performance but Lizzie and Miranda are kinda surprised by how brutally honest Gordo was to Kate. Gordo doesn’t feel any remorse because he feels like honesty is the best policy.

Gordo Crosses Over To The Dark Side

- After school, the trio are on their usual three-way phone call and Lizzie and Miranda really want for Gordo to find a way to get the both of them on camera. Gordo doesn’t think it’s a good idea but regardless, he tells them he will try to ask Stan.  

- Gordo also advises them that in order for them to get themselves noticed by Stan, they need to find their own voice and be themselves in front of the camera. Easy for him to say. 

Miranda needs to be more observant next time lol

- It seems like everyone at school is trying really hard to get their own chunk of screen-time because Hillridge Junior High basically looks like a circus now with everybody dressed up in colourful costumes and trying to showcase their talent. 

- Stan asks Gordo to go up to Larry Tudgeman and to “create conflict”, which means be mean to him. He asks Larry to describe himself, which he does in his quirky, ‘Tudgeman’ kind of way; Stan immediately gets bored and calls cut. Stan really wants Gordo to go in on Tudgeman and Gordo actually does what he says and proceeds to insult his looks and personal hygiene. 

- Lizzie and Miranda walk up to Gordo and they tell him that he was being mean to Larry. Gordo doesn’t listen to them because he’s been told by Stan that directors aren’t usually the ‘nice guys’. 

- This is when things get pretty interesting and not to mention, just plain awkward; Stan asks Gordo to introduce Lizzie and Miranda to the camera and we go down this rabbit hole, starting with Miranda saying that they keep each other’s secrets. Gordo becomes curious as to what these secrets are and Miranda, with her loose mouth accidentally reveals that Lizzie had a crush on Gordo in the 4th Grade! Shut the front door and say it ain’t so!

Miranda should have known better not to reveal that secret to Gordo, especially when in front of a camera!

- Lizzie freaks out and couldn’t believe that Miranda just blurted that out. She gets her revenge by telling everyone that Miranda used to snack on dog biscuits in the 4th grade. Basically, Lizzie and Miranda are now mad at each other and it’s all Gordo’s fault. Umm, it’s not his fault that Miranda can’t keep a secret.

Don’t Y’all Think That Stan Is A Creeper?

- Back at home, Lizzie feels really down about the whole situation and confides in her mom about what happened. Jo advises her to talk to them without the pressure of having to be filmed, which is the most obvious answer you can give. But, we do see Lizzie telling her mom that she used to like Gordo and Jo was like I KNEW IT! So, her mom ships them together I see. Good choice.

- We then see Lizzie and Miranda make up pretty quickly, which is for the better because I don’t need them to drag out their conflict any further. Meanwhile, Gordo is now targeting Ethan Craft and basically calls him good-looking but lacks any substance, which is highly offensive if you ask me. 

- Anyways, Lizzie and Miranda confront Gordo and tells him he’s being mean to people again. Gordo defends himself that him being that way is what’s gonna help him become a director in the future. Well, that’s what Stan is feeding into his brain. 

- They want Gordo to realize that the director is just using him and asking him to be someone he’s not. They also give him an ultimatum that they won’t want to be his friend anymore if he continues this mean streak of his and they head off into the girls’ room, which can I say it’s the perfect escape for them.

- At the Digital Bean, Gordo tries to talk to them again but his friends don’t want to deal with him until he stops listening to Stan. But the thing is, even when Gordo asks Stan to leave him alone, Stan doesn’t listen and continues to film him. It’s creepy how this grown adult is literally following and stalking a teenager with a camera and his crew. If I were Gordo, I would call my parents and give this guy trouble. 

Time To Make Things Right

- This is when the A-plot intersects with the B-plot. Matt and Melina are also at the Digital Bean because they also want to get the chance to appear in the documentary. 

Gordo is done with Stan, as he should be

- Gordo, who is frustrated with this whole thing gives a mini speech in front of the camera and calls Stan out by saying that he’s been encouraged by Stan to act mean to his friends. Stan is obviously not happy with Gordo at this point but Gordo doesn’t care because he wants his friends back. Luckily for him, Lizzie and Miranda saw the whole thing and they are happy to have the regular Gordo back as well. 

- Melina decides to play another prank on Matt by framing him for putting ketchup all over Stan’s video recorder. Stan sees Matt holding a ketchup bottle given to him by Melina and we then get a chase sequence between the two, which involves loads of ketchup and is that, cream and chocolate? This sequence resulted in this moment:

Attack of the Killer Tomato Sauce

- In the end, Gordo apologizes to his best friends for how he has been acting and Stan tells Gordo that he will never do business with Gordo ever again. Oh, what a shame.

B-Plot: Meet Matt’s Friend/’Girlfriend’, Melina Bianco

- Melina is first mentioned by Matt during breakfast when he informs his mom that he needs to stay back after school because he was framed by Melina for putting a rubber snake in the teacher’s desk. Matt doesn’t seem upset by this because he is somehow impressed by what she did. And of course, we suspect that he has a crush on Melina as well.

- We fast forward to later in the day (I think) and Matt is showing Melina his house and some of his fake accomplishments to which she immediately picks up on them being made up. However, her eyes set on Sam’s gnome statue, which is currently drying from a paint job and asks him about it. 

- This is basically when Melina sabotages Matt again. When Matt leaves the kitchen to set up his video game, Melina sneakily paints all over the gnome’s face, ruining Sam’s work. 

- Sam and Jo notices the butchering of the gnome statue and confronts the kids. Matt suggests to Melina that they both take the blame so that they would go easier on the both of them. Well, Matt should know by now that he cannot trust her like that and to no one’s surprise, she blames Matt and Matt admits he did it lol. 

- I thought Jo was smart enough to realise that Melina was the one who actually did it? I mean, she already knew from Matt that Melina framed him for the rubber snake incident. Or maybe she does know and she’s just doing this to teach Matt a lesson? I don’t know.

- We eventually get a montage of the both of them trying to frame the other for playing pranks on their teacher and classmates at school. And they seem to be having lots of fun; It’s such a weird relationship dynamic they have going on, no?

Overall Thoughts

- This episode was very packed, in a good way. The inclusion of Stan’s character generated a lot of drama within our main trio friend group. I hate to say it but I’m pretty sure there are real people in showbiz who are like Stan and they will do what they can to manipulate minors to get what they want. 

- He fed Gordo lies about how being mean and creating drama/conflict will make you a successful director. And it’s unfortunate that Gordo was caught up in all of that but at least he got out of it in the end. 

- We also know from watching this episode that Lizzie does indeed has or had a crush on Gordo. We got hints of it in episode 1.19, when Lizzie felt a little jealous about Gordo dating Brooke Baker. In terms of Gordo liking Lizzie back, there is no clear indication yet so far in the series but boy, we are going to get there pretty soon.

- The B-plot is actually pretty good. It’s nice to see Matt interact with a female friend (I mean girlfriend lol) from his age group just because we’ve seen Matt only have guy friends like Lanny and Oscar. Obviously, their relationship is portrayed in a silly, comedic way since they’re only kids. So, I won’t get into my deep thoughts about their strange relationship lol.