#look emerson comes to me in my dreams

[so-emo-i-fell-apart]

I need to stop researching Palaye Royale lore because I keep getting stuck on that they used to be called Kropp Circle and they were a Disney Next Big Thing

[navybrat817]

The Dad Diaries: Welcome Home

Pairing: Dad!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Bucky reflects on the first night with his son home and puts his thoughts to paper.

Word Count: Over 1.2k

Warnings: Fluff, reflecting, first time dad, slight feels (it's me), Bucky Barnes (he's a warning and a dad, okay?).

A/N: Welcome to The Dad Diaries! This AU will focus on Bucky and his relationship with his son (and you!) ❤️ Thanks to the beautiful @whisperlullaby for giving this intro a look and assuring me it wasn't garbage, but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky stared intently at the open blank journal that sat in the middle of his office desk. He had picked up the pen a few minutes ago, but hadn’t written a single word. Why did he feel stuck? Better yet, what was he thinking by doing this? Reading often came easy to him, but writing? That was something else entirely.

It was also something he wanted to do.

He ran a hand over his face with a sigh and wondered if he should call it a night, crawl into bed with you, and try tomorrow. No, he didn’t want to push it off before he even began. Glancing at the monitor, he heard your voice in his head, a memory of something you told him in the early stages of dating:

The best writing comes from the heart. Write what you and your heart love because no one knows that story better than you.

Bucky had plenty of stories to tell. How he became a hero and a good man after years of pain and darkness. Or how he fell in love with you and became your husband.

And his newest adventure of becoming a father.

He wasn’t sure how to be a dad yet, but he knew he loved his son. That was more than enough to start. And with a smile tugging at his lips, he put the pen to paper.

Hey, Nugget,

My name is James Buchanan Barnes. Most people call me Bucky. Your mom calls me her husband and I’m the luckiest man in the world for that, especially since she gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for: you.

Your name is James, too. Your mom doesn't know if we’ll call you Jamie or JJ, but I have a feeling you'll hear a bit of both. And one day, I’ll get to hear you call me Dad. Or Dada or Daddy or Papa.

Whatever makes you happy.

He paused in his writing when he thought he heard something on the monitor. His eyes flickered to the screen again and he breathed a little easier when he saw that his baby was still sleeping soundly in the middle of the crib. It wouldn’t stop him from checking on him later, just to be on the safe side.

I’m so glad you’re home. In fact, tonight is your first night in the nursery. I hope you like it here. To quote Ralph Waldo Emerson: “A house is made with walls and beams: a home is built with love and dreams.”

Yeah, your old man likes to read. Maybe you will, too. I even have an original copy of The Hobbit and would love to give it to you when you're older.

Books lined the far wall of Bucky’s office, many of them worn from the amount of times he read them. He made sure Jamie’s room had a reading nook, too. It was one of the only things he asked for when the two of you designed the nursery.

I hope you get enough sleep tonight. Your mom, too. You both did great at the hospital and deserve all the rest you can get.

Would you believe me if I said I was a nervous wreck when I brought your mom in, but tried not to let it show? People call me strong, but I don’t think I ever witnessed true strength until I saw how steady of a rock she was. She blew me away, which didn't surprise me. She amazes me every day.

Hearing your first cry stopped my heart and brought tears of joy to my eyes. After nine months of waiting and talking to your mom’s stomach, you were finally here. And seeing her hold you made me fall in love all over again.

Sorry if that sounds sappy, but it’s true. She looked right at me with happy tears in her eyes and said, “Bucky, look! Look at what we made! It's our little Nugget!” and my heart swelled. She insisted on calling you that and it rubbed off on me. Believe me when I say that you are the luckiest baby in the world to have the mother that you do.

He stopped writing again to glance at his wedding band, smiling all over again. He thought your love filled his heart before, but it overflowed now. It warmed him like nothing else ever could.

You’re probably wondering why I’m writing this since a lot of time will pass by the time you read this. Sometimes I may write to remember things I’m afraid I’ll forget. Other days I’ll write to reflect and get the words out when my mind is too loud. But my hope is that this will be a gift to you.

A bond for the two of us.

As you grow, I’ll fill the pages with the memories of you and our family. I’ll tell you about my past and how it shaped me into the man I am today. How your mom and I met and how I somehow convinced her to fall in love with me. And I’ll be sure to tell you about the day she told me we were going to have you and how that news changed my life for the better.

He swallowed the lump in his throat before he continued.

I also plan to fill this with your milestones. Like your first smile. Is it selfish if I hope to see it first? If not me, your mom. She’d love that. Your first step. Being selfish again, but I hope it’s me you walk toward so I can pick you up and tell you how proud I am. And your first word. I hope it’s Mama.

Though I won’t object if you say Dada.

Bucky chuckled as he imagined the look of betrayal on your beautiful face if your son said “Dada” first instead of “Mama”.

I’m sure some days I’ll have more to say than others. If I’m lucky, I can pass on life lessons and words of wisdom. Some days though I may not say the right thing and I know I’ll stumble along the way as I figure out how to be the best dad to you. I say “best” and not “perfect” because perfection doesn’t exist. Except for you and your mom.

The beauty of it is that I don’t have to go it alone. I’ll have your mom by my side to help guide and protect you and to watch you flourish. And my hope is that you know as you look through the pages how much we love you.

Even on days I may not get it right, I’m your dad, you’re my son, and you’ll always have a home with me and a place in my heart.

I’ll write more when I can, Nugget. Until then, I love you.

Always,

Dad

Bucky set the pen down as he exhaled. It wasn't perfect, but it didn't have to be. It was a start. As long as he put his heart into his words, it would shine from the pages.

And he couldn't wait for all the adventures he’d have with his little Nugget.

I hope you lovelies are excited to take this journey with Bucky. Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[theomnilegent]

2024 Upcoming Sapphic Fiction I’m Excited For! 🏳️‍🌈

Here are the top nine sapphic books I'm looking forward to for 2024! This year I'm excited to see how much more diversity there is amongst sapphic fiction - racial diversity, physical diversity, gender and sexuality diversity! Every year we get more and more books featuring a wider range of characters, and it makes me delighted every time.

2024 seems to be the year of the butch and otherwise gender non-conforming sapphic characters! There is even, much to my joy, a book about drag kings! I've been wanting a book about drag kings since I first started reading sapphic fiction, so I'm so pleased that one finally exists!

Below you'll find Goodreads links and summaries to each book. As always, this list is only a starting point - if you want to find more sapphic fiction, there's plenty to find on Goodreads and StoryGraph!

Furious by Jamie Pacton

After years racing go-karts and looking up to her mother, a celebrity Nascar racer, Jojo Emerson-Boyd should be starting her own racing career. But when she loses her mom in a tragic crash, Jojo’s future comes to a screeching halt. Now her dad won’t let her get a license, much less race. Instead, she’s stuck working at her grandmother’s mechanic shop in the sleepy small town of Dell’s Hollow.

But Jojo’s heart quickens when Motorcycle Girl Eliana “El” Blum shows up at the shop. El grew up on the motocross circuit sidelines, watching her sister and idol Maxine compete. When El mysteriously loses all contact with Max, she’s determined to find her, with her first clue leading straight to the mechanic shop, and to Jojo.

United by fate, the two quickly bond over Mario Kart showdowns and the Fast & Furious films. As their friendship shifts into something more, they’ll have to confront both their growing romance and the grief woven into their complicated families if they hope to chase down their dreams and make it across the finish line.

How You Get the Girl by Anita Kelly When smart-mouthed Vanessa Lerner joins the high school basketball team Julie Parker coaches, Julie’s ready for the challenge. What she’s not ready for is Vanessa’s new foster parent, Elle Cochrane—former University of Tennessee basketball star. While star-struck at first, soon Julie persuades Elle to step into the unfilled position of assistant coach for the year.  Even though Elle has stayed out of the basketball world since an injury ended her short-lived WNBA career, the gig might be a way to become closer to Vanessa—and to spend more time with Julie, who makes Elle laugh. As the coaches grow closer, Elle has a hard time understanding how Julie is single. When Julie reveals her lifelong insecurity about dating and how she wishes it was more like sports—being able to practice first—it sparks an intriguing idea. While Elle still doubts her abilities as a basketball coach, helping Julie figure out dating is definitely something she can do. But as the basketball season progresses, and lines grow increasingly blurred, Julie and Elle must decide to join the game—or retreat to the sidelines.

Late Bloomer by Mazey Eddings

Winning the lottery has ruined Opal Devlin’s life. After quitting her dead-end job where she’d earned minimum wage and even less respect, she’s bombarded by people knocking at her door for a handout the second they found out her bank account was overflowing with cash. And Opal can’t seem to stop saying yes.

With her tender heart thoroughly abused, Opal decides to protect herself by any means necessary, which to her translates to putting almost all her new money to buying a failing flower farm in Asheville, North Carolina to let the flowers live out their plant destiny while she uses the cabin on the property to start her painting business.

But her plans for isolation and self-preservation go hopelessly awry when an angry (albeit gorgeous) Pepper Smith is waiting for her at her new farm. Pepper states she’s the rightful owner of Thistle and Bloom Farms, and isn’t moving out. The unlikely pair strike up an agreement of co-habitation, and butt-heads at every turn. Can these opposites both live out their dreams and plant roots? Or will their combustible arguing (and growing attraction) burn the whole place down?

A Banh Mi for Two by Trinity Nguyen

In Sài Gòn, Lan is always trying to be the perfect daughter, dependable and willing to care for her widowed mother and their bánh mì stall. Her secret passion, however, is A Bánh Mì for Two, the food blog she started with her father, but has stopped updating since his passing.

Meanwhile, Vietnamese American Vivi Huynh, has never been to Việt Nam. Her parents rarely even talk about the homeland that clearly haunts them. So Vivi secretly goes to Vietnam for a study abroad program her freshman year of college. She’s determined to figure out why her parents left, and to try everything she’s seen on her favorite food blog, A Bánh Mì for Two.

When Vivi and Lan meet in Sài Gòn, they strike a deal. Lan will show Vivi around the city, helping her piece together her mother’s story through crumbling photographs and old memories. Vivi will help Lan start writing again so she can enter a food blogging contest. And slowly, as they explore the city and their pasts, Vivi and Lan fall in love.

The No-Girlfriend Rule by Christen Randall

Hollis Beckwith isn’t trying to get a girl—she’s just trying to get by. For a fat, broke girl with anxiety, the start of senior year brings enough to worry about. And besides, she already has a Chris. Their relationship isn’t particularly exciting, but it’s comfortable and familiar, and Hollis wants it to survive beyond senior year. To prove she’s a girlfriend worth keeping, Hollis decides to learn Chris’s favorite tabletop roleplaying game, Secrets & Sorcery—but his unfortunate “No Girlfriends at the Table” rule means she’ll need to find her own group if she wants in.

Gloria Castañeda and her all-girls game of S&S! Crowded at the table in Gloria’s cozy Ohio apartment, the six girls battle twisted magic in-game and become fast friends outside it. With her character as armor, Hollis starts to believe that maybe she can be more than just fat, anxious, and a little lost.

But then an in-game crush develops between Hollis’s character and the bard played by charismatic Aini Amin-Shaw, whose wide, cocky grin makes Hollis’s stomach flutter. As their gentle flirting sparks into something deeper, Hollis is no longer sure what she wants…or if she’s content to just play pretend.

We Got the Beat by Jenna Miller

Jordan Elliot is a fat, nerdy lesbian, and the first junior to be named editor-in-chief of the school newspaper. Okay, that last part hasn’t happened yet, but it will. It’s positive thinking that has gotten Jordan this far. Ever since Mackenzie West, her friend-turned-enemy, humiliated her at the start of freshman year, Jordan has thrown herself into journalism and kept her eyes trained on the future.

So it’s a total blow when Jordan discovers that she not only didn’t get the editor-in-chief spot, but she’s been assigned the volleyball beat instead. And who is the star and new captain of the volleyball team? Mackenzie West. But words are Jordan’s weapon, and she has some ideas about how to exact a long-awaited revenge on her nemesis.

Then things get murky when forced time together has Mack and Jordan falling back into their friendship, and into something more. And when Mack confesses the real reason she turned on Jordan freshman year, it has Jordan questioning everything—past, present, and future. If Jordan lets her guard down and Mack in, will she get everything she wants, or will she be humiliated all over again?

Playing for Keeps by Jennifer Dugan

June is the star pitcher of her elite club baseball team—with an ego to match—and she's a shoo-in to be recruited at the college level, like her parents have always envisioned. That is, if she can play through an overuse injury that has recently gone from bad to worse.

Ivy isn't just reffing to pay off her athletic fees or make some extra cash on the side. She wants to someday officiate at the professional level, even if her parents would rather she go to college instead.

The first time they cross paths, Ivy throws June out of a game for grandstanding. Still, they quickly grow from enemies to begrudging friends . . . and then something more. But the rules state that players and umpires are prohibited from dating.

As June's shoulder worsens, and a rival discovers the girls' secret and threatens to expose them, everything the two have worked so hard for is at risk. Now both must follow their dreams . . . or follow their hearts?

The Summer Love Strategy by Ray Stoeve

Hayley always has a crush. The problem is, her crushes never like her back. After her latest unrequited love—a girl from her basketball team—gets a boyfriend, she decides she’s done falling for girls who are unavailable. Her best friend, Talia, wants romance too, but rarely gets crushes on anyone, and she’s tired of watching Hayley get her heart stomped on over and over. So the two girls make a they’ll help each other find summer love by putting themselves in situations that always lead to romance in movies.

To help carry out their summer love strategy, they make a list of all the places they could find their real-life the beach, the Pride parade, the pool, a MUNA concert, and a party. But as they go to each place and try to find the one , it seems like they just can’t catch a break—they don’t know how to talk to cute strangers, someone mistakes Hayley as straight, and Hayley does a truly unfortunate DIY haircut (that she cannot be held responsible for––it was a crisis!). But when Talia and Hayley finally manage to score dates, will they be able to get out of their own way and really dive into the romances they deserve? Or is summer love not as far off as Hayley thought?

Don't Be a Drag by Skye Quinlan

When eighteen-year-old Briar Vincent's mental health takes a turn for the worst, her parents send her to spend the summer in New York City with her older brother, Beau, also known as the drag queen Bow Regard.

Backstage at the gay bar where Beau performs, Briar just wants to be a fly on the wall, but she can't stand by when the cute but conceited drag king Spencer Read tries to put down another up-and-coming performer. To prove to him that even a brand-new performer could knock him off his pedestal, Briar signs up for the annual drag king competition.

There's just one flaw in her plan: Briar has never done drag before.

With the help of her brother and a few new friends, Briar becomes Edgar Allan Foe, a drag king hellbent on taking Spencer down. But unless she can learn how to shake her anxiety and perform, she doesn't stand a chance of winning Drag King of the Year, overcoming her depression and inner demons, or avoiding falling for her enemy, who might not be so bad after all.

[cecilioque]

Lani Comic Master Post

I’ve organized the comic in order so its easier to find and read.  

Lani’s Journey

Concept Art >> Part 1 > Part 2 > Part 3 > Part 4 > Have to fight > Meet Kamado > Meet Beni  > Mantine Surfing > Meet Zisu > Bad Aim > Where did she go? > Berry Picking > Time to go > I am Free > Again > You Can Leave? > New Year/New Tracks / Forgiveness Part 1 / Forgiveness Part 2 / But can you stop me / Why I Leave / Meet Volo / Did she leave? / No time is wasted / And so they wait / Home / Magikarp / Irreplaceable YOU / Pointless / Little Steps / Space and Time / Take a break / Speed Run Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Blame Me / Boiling Point / Unraveled / Forgiveness Part 3 / Keep Going

More Lani Comics

Dinner /  Coconut / How do you lose a woman / Ukulele / Meme Music / Isn’t that a date? / I have a permit / Lani’s fears / Ice Boy / Panic Attack / The Gang is all here / Watcha got there? / What a Woman / Pretty Flowers / Run / Scars Part 1 / Scars Part 2 / Two truths and One lie / What do you take with you / Emmet No / Smoochies / A Bad Dream / Happy Holidays / Is that his wife?/ Celestica Flute / Girls like flowers / Looking for a fight Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 /  Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Final Part /Surprise / Pearl Clan Outfit / How to say goodbye / Black Parade / Core Memory

Comics for thought

Meet Emmet Part 1/ Meet Emmet Part 2 / Is Emmet Sad? / New routine Part 1 / New routine Part 2 / Lost part 1 / Lost Part 2 /  We needed you / Plant Trees / A Good Person / We are not the same /

Submas Funnies

Heat Stroke / Am I a Man or a Muppet / V2 Man or a Muppet / Muppet Boys / Return of the buff brother / I was sad / Joltik Attack / Emmets Socks / Lego Men

Caelum and Emerson

My art:  1 | 2 | 3 | Sword Practice | Leathers | Before | Uniform | Fashion | Emerson | Roseate Eyes | The Astronomer | Art by @fronomeeps​:  1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Inspired | Caelum Expressions | Cat Caelum | 2 | Sketch dump | Humanity |

Character Design Analysis

The Submas / Volo / Adaman

Character Appearances

Daki @anime-grimmy / Isla @faestorian / Jess @draken-rotzi / Reno / Clone Lucas @tjs-stuffs​

Other Social Media

Instagram@sunseachu / Twitter@sunjuicy1 / AO3

Caramelldansen Animation Meme Template

Tall Character base / Short Character Base

Email List 

(Newsletter, updates, and bonus offers)

Merch Section

Apparel

Ingo Haori / Emmet Haori / Diamond and Pearl Clan Hoodies / Ginko guild Hoodie / Socks / Shirts / Ingo Hoodie / Emmet Hoodie / Eel Shirt / Eel Pants

Pins

Submas Set / Warden Set / Emmet / Ingo / Volo / Warden Ingo/ Traveler Emmet / Lani / Isla / Daki / Joltik / Tea Time Submas

Other Merch

Body Pillows / Submas Reusable Sticker Book / Pokedex Reusable Sticker Book / Tote Bags / Submas Socks / Keychains

EU Shop

Coming Soon

Plushies

[ria-coolgirl]

Nightmare fuel 

CW:contains canon deaths, blood and feelings of guilt.

summary:David has a nightmare about the guilt he feels about not being able to save himself or Dwayne,Paul and Marko from their deaths and blaming himself for it!

The cave was silent as the wind blew through it, the calm stillness of the night was felt as the night continued on. Everything seemed so calm and peaceful in the cave, but in the mind of the leader of the lost boys that wasn’t the case.

David was groaning when the dream started to take shape in his mind again wanting it to stop, but it never did.

The dream is always the same as before, but this time this was different. The dream starts with him being on the floor of the Emerson’s house the house was empty and there were no doors, he gets up and looks around the house,when he heard it; loud screeching yells that could make his ears bleed as the sound grew more intense than before when suddenly he felt a hand in his jacket collar it was Dwayne who’s body was broken and his hair static with electrical shock and his eyes still red and fill of anger.

Dwayne:”you” he murmured

David:”Dwayne?”

Dwayne:”You…why didn’t you helped me?”

David:”i-I didn’t think you-“

Dwayne:”Ohhh you didn’t think?!?” You’re our leader YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO HELP YOUR FAMILY YOU BASTARD!!!”

David stood there in silence, Dwayne was right he could’ve done something, anything he could’ve helped him, but he didn’t.

David”Dwayne, you’re right and I’m so sorry for not helping you.”

Dwayne:”NO YOUR NOT!!!” He yelled “YOUR NOT SORRY, David and you never will be!”

His words cut through David’s mind like a blade, he never asked for this to happen, he was just doing what max told him to do, but it was far too late to start over again.

David took a step back from Dwayne, before he could balled up his fist and start to attack him; chains started to grab Dwayne and dragged him down into the ground swallowing him onto the floor of the room.

David was mortified as he watched Dwayne disappear from him, but he knew that he had to find Paul next. David walked up towards the stairs to the bathroom and looked around the room for Paul when suddenly he heard a bubbling sound coming from the bathtub…a hand reached out from the bath and a body came out from the bathtub and on to the floor.

Paul’s face was almost unrecognizable, it looked kind of malty and bloody, but his eyes were still red from the fight, he’s hair was wet and so was his clothes from the holy water and garlic. Before he could say anything he immediately starting choke up the holy water that was in his throat and started to crawl on all fours toward David.

Paul:*laughing softly* “You know, they should’ve killed me first.” “I guess i should’ve kept my guard up on that one.” *still laughing softly*

David looked at him with horror and sadness as he slowly takes his jacket off to cover Paul with it.

Paul yelled at the top of his lungs, shoving the jacket away, “I SHOULD’VE DIED FIRST MAN!” “NOT MARKO!” “THIS IS ALL MY FAULT!”

David:”No this is not your fault!” “We were asleep when that happened, so there was nothing you could do.” He said calmly

Just like with Dwayne chains take a hold on Paul and dragged him back to the bathtub. “Please tell me that Marko will be alright, okay David?” Paul cried

David nodded in agreement with a single tear in his eye as he watched Paul get dragged back into the bathtub. He stood up and looked down at the bathtub which was empty now. He took a step back and walked away from the bathroom and down towards the stairs, when suddenly he heard loud crackling sound it traveled across the house when the house itself began to collapse.

David ran as fast as he could to get outside and when he did the house was completely destroyed. He looked around to find his motorcycle, but it was gone he tried to fly, but he couldn’t fly either, so he decided to keep running until he got to the cave. Everything around was rapidly disappearing the boardwalk, the amusement park just about everything was disappearing into nothingness.

When he got to the cave everything looked normal, but he knew that the cave will disappear soon, so he had to be quick and find Marko before it’s too late. When David reached the end of the cave he saw Marko lying on the ground where he fall when he was staked.

David:”Marko?” “Marko!!” *grabbing him by his shoulder and pulling him close into a hug*

Marko:”D-David?” “Is that you?” He muttered

David:”Yeah it’s me” “I’m here” he said with tears in his eyes as he continued to hold him in his arms.

Marko:*moaned in pain* “those brats stabbed me!” “While I was asleep too, I wanna kill them now maybe have them for breakfast.” He said chuckling to himself

David:*smiling at the thought* “haha only if you share, Marko.”

Marko:”I will” “You know I will always share.”

David:”I know”

Marko:”Hey, David are Paul and Dwayne awake?” “I must have woke them up from my screaming and if they are awake can we go to boardwalk?”

David’s heart sank when he heard that he knew that the boardwalk was now gone and soon will the cave, but he knew that he needed to strong for Marko.

David:Yeah…yeah,Marko we can go to the boardwalk.” “We can do whatever you want.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

“Hey,David I’m still a little tired, can I take a nap on your shoulder?”

“Sure you can, Marko” he said with a sad grin on his face

“Hey-hey, Marko let’s keep talking more ok?” You don’t have to talk just listen okay?” “I never said this out loud before, but I just wanted you know that you, me, Dwayne and Paul are like a family right?” “Max’s plan on trying to make us perfect is bullshit” “Because in our way we are already a family!” “We have fun, we care for each other, we love each other just like any other family would right?” *laughing while sobbing as he hugs Marko tightly in his arms, caressing his hair*

“I sound absolutely crazy don’t I?” “Us as family?” “Max wouldn’t like that, now would he?” *laughing softly to himself* “But I don’t care if he doesn’t like it, because he will never understand what a family is!” “We’re go to the boardwalk together and have fun like always and be a family, wouldn’t that be nice Marko?”

David heard the last breath from Marko as he taps him on the shoulders. “Marko Marko…MARKO!?!”

The cave had completely disappeared and Marko sunk down to the ground with chains around him leaving David alone in the dark void. David sobbed while hugging his knees in fetal position knowing that he is now alone.

“BOYS” “I WANT YOU BACK” PLEASE COME BACK” “please I don’t wanna be alone” he whispered

“David”

“David”

“DAVID”

He opened his eyes to see Dwayne, Paul and Marko on the rails of their sleeping counter of the hotel. “David are you okay man?” Said Paul “We heard you crying in your sleep is everything okay?” Said Marko “And we heard you say you don’t wanna be alone?” “What’s that about did you have a nightmare?” Said Dwayne

As much as embarrassing as this is he had to tell them. He took a deep breath and looked at them “I had a nightmare about you guys.”

“What;about us?”

“What did we do in your dream?”

“You guys blamed me for not helping you back there.”

“What!?!” They said in unison

“We would never blame you for that!” Said Marko

“We care about you too much to be doing that.” Said Dwayne

“Yeah, if there is anyone we can blame for that is max!” Said Paul

A long pause of silence

“Pfft”

“Hahaha”

All of them were hysterically laughing which lighted up the mood.

“Haha, you are so right man!”

David:*still laughing* “Where would I be without you guys?”

Paul:”You would absolutely be miserable!”

“Touché Paul touché” said David

Marko moved closer to David and leaned his head against his chest and Dwayne and Paul followed suit and hold each other tightly.

“What are you guys doing?”

“I heard somewhere that if you cuddle with the people you love you don’t get any more nightmares.” Said Marko

David:*rolling his eyes with a smirk* “You made that up.”

So, so what if I did I am not going to let you have a nightmare on my watch!”

“We don’t let family have nightmares in here, David.”

“I’m family to you guys?”

“Yes, so shut up and let us cuddle you, you big baby!”

David felt reassured that everything will okay and he can go back to sleep. Slowly closing his eyes with a smile on his face as he continues to dream with his boys.

“No more nightmares” Marko whispered 

“No more nightmares” whispered David

THE END



[mysterycitrus]

ur nightwing comic pitch looks SO GOOD its driving me insane. for 1 ur kory design is incredible to me and for 2 ur pitch looks like itd shoot me in the heart i LOVE it

ur cast choices intrigue me!!! especially having rose and chris as major players, what made you pick them? based on persephone i wouldve expected to see donna, but i dont she was around in 2011, is that the reason why?

again ur pitch is incredible it just has me 👁👁 i am staring sooo intently. begging to understand. dreaming of mysterycitrus nightwing comic

thank u very much! the positive response to the pitch has been very sweet — im especially glad that it’s resonating with nightwing fans hehehe

to answer ur q — if i were to do more character sheets, donna and vic stone would be first on the list (followed by babs, helena, bea, clancy, tim, and maybe jason or cass or grant emerson). the reason i chose chris kent is because it’s set in post-crisis, pre-flashpoint new earth, but also because chris is a fundamentally more interesting character than jon imo

rose wilson has an interesting dynamic with both dick and roy, and id love to see that come back in a comic. she was lian’s babysitter! dick was an acting guardian for her and she lived with roy for a little bit. i miss them 💔

korys inclusion is honestly more petty — i love her a lot, id love her to be in more solo ongoings rather than just the titans, but also rhato is my least favourite comic of all time and i need her outta there, stat. but also i love drawing her in fun outfits, so that was also definitely part of it lol

[misslavenderlady]

MONSTER MANIA CON POST!!

This weekend was an absolute dream come true! Everything I had hoped and dreamed for my very first convention. And I'm incredibly grateful that I got to be there with @ghoulgeousimmaculate @bloodsuckingfiends & @silvermaplealder (and his friend Jess). Everyone was so kind and fun to be around. I'll give the rundown of who I met in this post and I'll add another post later on with more pictures!

💜💜💜

The first day Ghoulie and I checked in early and got all dolled up to meet Alex Winter first. I got both an autograph and a photo op with him. He seemed a little tired/out of it and I assume that's because he JUST got back from the U.K. and went straight to the convention. His photo op was super quick and I was only able to pose next to him, not with him.

But still, he was super cool and was very happy when I told him how I introduced my fiancé to the Bill & Ted trilogy. I also showed him an art commission I requested of Ricky Coogan! He was a nice dude overall 😄

The second day Maple and I dressed up as David and Michael! I even got the honor of doing his makeup to make the cosplay extra authentic. He gave me some of his amazing, homemade stickers as a "thank you"! He was hands down the best looking David cosplayer in the whole convention.

I got to get an autograph from Heather Langenkamp before doing a selfie with her. I was the last one to see her before she left for photo ops. She was an absolute delight! I talked about listening to her episode on the Dead Meat podcast and we had a bonding moment over that. When I posed with her, I did a peace sign and she copied the pose.

Then she said "that's such a coincidence because I wear THIS every day!" and she pulled out a necklace with a peace sign charm. She was just so delightful 😊

Billy was an absolute dream. He has the most warm, caring look in his eyes and was very interested when I talked about how The Lost Boys got me back into writing. I was getting a little emotional, and I could tell he was on standby if I needed some help.

I had a photo op with him later, but I paid an extra $10 for a selfie with him. My hand was trembling from my nervousness and he was kind enough to hold it steady so I could take the picture. He made sure I was comfortable the whole time I interacted with him. 🥰

Also, I picked out a picture of Paul and Dwayne to be signed as a way to honor Brooke. When Billy saw it he said "awww I love this pic! 🥺" I was fighting tears ngl.

Kiefer was an incredible guy!! I decided just to do a photo op and not an autograph because people were lining up at 3 IN THE DAMN MORNING and I wasn't about to do that lol. He loved the outfits that Ghoulie and Maple wore, and it was such a delight seeing his smile. He was so kind with me. Very welcoming and didn't hesitate to shake my hand or wrap an arm around me for our picture! I think he was still is a great mood after seeing Maples perfect cosplay lol

The last celeb I met was Jason, and I gotta say, I think he was my favorite. Jordyn wasn't exaggerating when she said he was so nice. He was by far the kindest person I met at the whole convention (and that's saying something considering everyone was a delight to meet). I felt like he truly cared about meeting every single fan and was genuinely listening with interest when I told him the story of how @michael-after-hours got his name from Michael Emerson.

When I tell you his face LIT UP when he saw my cosplay. He was so overjoyed and it made me even happier to be dressed as Michael. The joyful energy was just so infectious. 🥰

I'm so incredibly lucky to have met all of these wonderful icons in horror. They truly did care about their fans and made the whole experience extra special. I would do it all again in a heartbeat if I could.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

TAG LIST

@hypocriticaltypwriter @ria-coolgirl @fallingthruspace @silvermaplealder @britany1997 @leiasolo77 @starlahuskyz @vampirefilmlover @charlizekkelly @charlottieellis @ghoulgeousimmaculate @michael-after-hours @legal-lost-boy @unethicallysourced @auntvamp

[v3nusxsky]

would you be open to doing a larissa weems request. something along the lines of reader finding out she’s pregnant with twins, (they already have one or two children already). but the twist is that she gets the kiddos to help tell larissa. thank you 🫶

More munchkins? | Fluff

*Authors notes~ flufffff and I got to explore a few of my oc children in here so I'm like super excited to get this out. I hope this is what you are looking for my darling. And I love the idea so much.*

Trigger warnings~ pregnancy, twins fluff?

Prompt~ see ask^^^

❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦❦

Life with your little family was truly perfect, everything you've ever wanted and dreamed off here in your hands. You worked as a Bounty teacher for your wife who if principal of Nevermore. So you both live at the school with your son Emerson James who was five and your daughter Isla Rae who is three. Emerson was the spit of you but completely like he's mamma personality and behaviour wise, Isla being the typical hyper three year old child, with that cheeky too thing smile and the cute little crackly laugh. The spit of your wife in every sense of the word. You and Larissa couldn't be happier with how life is now.

That's why it was so scary to be sat in your en suite bathroom holding a blinking pregnancy test. Your two children had been carefully planned, so loved and wanted by you both but neither of you had discussed any extra children. You had your boy and your girl, and they were perfect truly how would another baby fit into the puzzle that was seemingly complete?

The first thing you did was get ahold of your doctor, had the bloods and all the mandatory tests needed, the results seemingly worrying the doctor. You couldn't help but panic. Maybe you should've told Larissa first? After all she was present all the way through your first two pregnancies and births. The doctor managed to get you booked in for an ultrasound the same day, all easing your mind.

During the ultrasound, you could only see the sack of the baby, everything looked to be healthy until the ultrasound tech went silent. "And here's baby B" the murmured showing you the other sack, "you look to be having identical twins" they confirmed as tears immediately began to fall. Twins. You were stressing about one baby, now you had two. Oh gosh. How would you tell Larissa that you were pregnant with twins.

You knew she needed to know, they were her children too, and you had to tell Emery and Isla. You knew Emery loved being a big brother and Isla had been asking for a sister for the past few months. Going on your gut feeling you'd say she has a two for one deal in the sibling department right now. Two boys or two girls you were not fussy just two healthy babies would be perfect. It was crazy how you could them so much already when they are so early on in the pregnancy but you did.

You decided to include the children in the reveal so you picked up what you needed and headed back to the school to put the plan in motion. Preparing absolutely everything to make it go so perfectly. You couldn't deny they looked absolutely adorable as you waited for Larissa to turn up.

"Hi sweetheart" she murmured coming into your little apartment that was located on the school ground. You immediately sent Emery to run to your wife, his shirt saying "big brother, baby in bagging area" absolutely puzzling your wife as she read it while greeting him with kisses and cuddles, "hi my little prince, how was school? Where's you momma sister baby?"  Instead of letting him answer, you placed Isla down and let her toddle over to her mama. Her little pink shirt reading "big sister, unexpected item in bagging area" both shirts on the back had baby one and baby two est sept 8th 23.

"My gorgeous girl, where's your momma too hmm? What you two little angels trying to tell me hmm?" She murmured tickling both the children so their giggles filled the room. "Hi my love" you murmured coming out of hiding. "Unexpected item in bagging area?" She quizzed laughing at how funny the phrase was, "baby? Are you?" You nodded with tears brimming your eyes. "We gwts sissyssss" Isla squealed happily only to be met with her brothers, "or brothers!" In a protests of the thought of two more sisters. He would be truly outnumbered.

"Oh sweetheart, that's perfect news, another little angle to add to our family" she murmured kissing your cheek happily as she held you, your children running off to play now.

"Two angels" you murmured happily putting a hand over your flat stomach."two? Twins?" You nodded again as she kissed you happily. "Two more to complete our family, god I'm so in love with you" she murmured against your lips. Although not planned these two would be well and truly loved. By the time they were born you knew you had two daughters. Delilah Faye and Liliana mae. Your little lilah and lily completed your family.

Word count~ 876

[paradimeshifts7]

All my things, all in one place 🌱 ↴

Twitter | ao3

All my fics, mostly steddie:

Desperado (You better let somebody love you)

Rated E | 164k | Exes to lovers

Twelve years after tire tracks and shattered trust, Wayne's illness brings Eddie back to Hawkins.

Once Bitten (Twice Shy)

Rated E | 22k | Christmas fic

Steve’s relationship with Christmas had always been tenuous, to say the least, but it didn’t help that this was the first Christmas he would be suffering through since his ex-girlfriend had snatched up his self-esteem and taken off running the year before.

He knew it was the intrinsically romantic quality of the holiday season, and nothing more. Just his lonely bones after a year of healing from heartbreak.

But Eddie's arms around him when he needed them most were starting to feel a lot like love.

Silk Chiffon

Rated E | 6k | Library smut

Steve and Eddie visit Robin and Nancy at Emerson, and a casual stroll through the library stacks turns into the best blowjob of Steve's goddamn life.

Tooth and Nail

Rated E | 113k | Punk pop slow burn

Eddie told himself that he was done, because he wouldn’t survive another heartbreak at that boy’s hands. But he really, really needs someone to open for them on tour.

Steve has a fist full of letters by the time he arrives in Los Angeles, but the Eddie Munson he knew is nowhere to be found. Left to make sense of this new version of the friend he once bared his soul to, Steve’s just trying not to fall off the fucking deep end again.

Lover, Come Over

Rated E | 15k | EMT Eddie/Divorcee Steve

Steve Harrington is the last person Eddie expects to see sitting on the curb when he responds to the call, but there he is, looking like absolute hell.

Sometimes, love is right on time.

Apple Pie (Baked Just Right)

Rated M | 4k | Food as a love language

Three times Steve silently says "I love you", and the one time Eddie says it back.

This Little Light of Mine

Rated E | 4k | Dad fic

It begins with a cough.

Just a dry, brittle thing that starts up one Friday morning over rice cereal and apple juice.

One look at Rosie, and Eddie knew she’d pull through just fine. Kids get sick, a simple fact of life. Something Steve, surely, is aware of.

Right?

Star Light, Star Bright

Rated E | 4k | Soulmates, Dreams

Steve swore he never dreamt before the age of sixteen, his nights spent swimming alone through dark, formless slumber until suddenly — he was no longer alone.

At age twenty, he finds himself staring into a pair of familiar eyes.

The Very Thought of You

Rated E | 65k | Jazz AU

The jazz music scene explodes when world-renowned pianist Eddie Munson is spotted getting cozy with a mystery man in New York City. Journalists have managed to link the pretty face to the prestigious Harrington name, an old money family with business all over the globe and a direct link to Diana Harrington, famous jazz starlet. But reports of bad trades and schemes gone wrong are beginning to muddy the waters of this particular love story, and it’s only a matter of time before the real origins of this torrid affair emerge.

The Poem You Make of Me

Rated E | 7k | Touch-starved wlw

“Could I?” She asks, barely a whisper.

“Could you what?”

“Take care of you,” Eddie says, ducking down to press a slow kiss to Stevie’s shoulder, pausing to murmur against her skin. “Make you feel good.”

Soft as Sin (Let Me In)

Rated E | 2k | pwp

Steve Harrington was drunk, although not as drunk as he wanted to be. Definitely not drunk enough to distract him from the fact that Eddie was sleeping no more than six feet away, the curves of his body laid out on the twin bed blurred in the dark. Despite the constant swimming in his head, Steve lay still, having to remind himself to breathe every couple of moments lest he pass out from the sheer apprehension.

Sugar’s Sweet (And So Is He)

Rated E | 42k | Sugar baby Steve/lit professor Eddie

The sugar baby!Steve and lit professor/author!Eddie au, wherein Eddie is a disaster at fine dining, and Steve helps him out.

Among the Wildflowers

Rated E | 28k | Steddie BB ‘23

It was easy, letting go. At least, that’s what Eddie told himself as he watched Hawkins fade to a tiny smudge on the horizon, his whole life packed into the van and Wayne’s old truck as they fled the Indiana tree line for the high mountain valleys of Idaho. Amidst the hot, dry air and sweet sagebrush, Eddie’s mind wandered, crawling back night after night under a blanket of stars to the golden boy he left behind and the chasm in his chest that used to house his heart — whistling and waiting, a near eternal ache.

Home came together slowly, and then all at once when Steve Harrington showed up on his doorstep a year later — haggard and worn, searching for something among the wildflowers.

A tale of death, birth, and the promise of green.

Some Kind of Angel

Rated E | 6k | Accidental subspace

The one where Eddie yells at Steve, and Steve accidentally goes into subspace about it.

Strawberry Fields

Rated E | 19k | Small town romcom

So close to earning his Emmy and the life he's always wanted, Steve sets off with a cameraman to the tiny town of Mt. Harding, hoping to catch a glimpse of a winter solstice phenomenon held secret by locals. It’s not exactly the gig he’s always dreamed of, but he’ll make it work. The only problem is that he has to do it with Eddie Munson.

The Moon Doesn’t Mind

Rated E | 14k | Unconventional omegaverse

Stuck in the Upside Down, Steve and Eddie are forced to reckon with what they’ve become, and what they’ve always been.

Monster. Inhuman. Changed.

In the Garden, Under Your Hand

Rated E | 23k | Community garden au

Thrown into community service after a bad run-in with his dad, Eddie is hardly expecting the next few months to be anything of note. That is, until Steve Harrington emerges from behind a patch of sunflowers at the community garden, claiming to be his supervisor.

The Winner Takes It All

Rated E | 32k | Romcom (My Best Friend’s Wedding AU)

Later, as he was sitting on the toilet, he remembered what Steve had said: February. The wedding was in February. Eddie checked his phone, confirming his suspicion.

“Fuck,” he swore softly, and then again, “Fuck.”

A little over two months until Steve said I do, binding himself to a total stranger. Eddie wasn’t about to let his best friend get snatched up by someone who was likely not good enough for him, let alone someone Eddie had never heard of. Steve was too kind to be taken advantage of like that — too special.

How things had ended up as they had, Eddie couldn’t be sure, but one way or another, he was going to get to the bottom of it.

On the Living Room Floor

Rated T | 1k | Stobin minific

The end of the world happens on a Tuesday.

Kalahari Down

Rated E | 11k | Small town country singer Steve/Rockstar Eddie

When his tour bus breaks down just outside of Hawkins, Indiana, Eddie Munson isn’t expecting the tiny town to offer up anything more than a cheap drink and a few side eyes.

He isn’t expecting Steve.

Tempest Entire

Rated E | 20k | Lighthouse/amnesia

The shape loomed dark and odd in the middle distance, flat on the sand like some dead thing, ominous in its unrecognizability. Through the lash of salt, Eddie squinted, walking toward the shape with morbid curiosity. He felt himself pale as he came closer, a knot of dread drawing tight in his stomach, because it wasn’t a seal or any kind of plant-based lump that lay motionless on the beach.

It was a man.

Impossible Not To

Rated E | 2k | Stommy collab with @tone-mariie

Except for Steve, it had always been more than that.

I’ll Show You Hands Ready to Bleed

Rated E | 5k | Vampire Eddie

It was meant to be a casual offer.

“You could drink some of my blood, I don’t mind.”

But the moment Eddie’s pupils began to narrow at the notion, Steve knew there was going to be nothing casual about what happened next.

Evermore

Rated E | 50k | Magic/fantasy au

The blight spread quickly, ravenous in its hunger as it stretched toward the high seat of the royal city, its evil already well-known to the farmlands where the earth lay dry and cracked — where magic and its ruin had no friend.

Steve knew the labor he put forth on his father’s land would amount to nothing, but still he toiled, knowing not what else to do, the oath he’d sworn a noose around his neck.

That is, until a stranger stumbled into his shed and into his life.

Until Eddie.

Come a Little Closer

Rated E | 10k | ren faire, omegaverse

Waylaid by a surprise rut, Eddie is certain he won’t be able to get through the ren faire without making it tragically weird for everyone involved. Steve is convinced he can get him through it — what are his stupid pheromones for, after all? Everything will be fine. That is, if Steve can keep his own feelings in check.

[desertdollranch]

My DIY WellieWishers Playhouse

A few weeks ago, I found this Our Generation brand beach house at a secondhand shop. A little doll playhouse has been on my wish list for a long time, specifically because I wanted to renovate it into a customized dream home for my five dear sweet Wellies!  

I love these little kiddos. They’re so cute and charming. I had originally only planned to get Emerson, but then I found Willa at a thrift store and couldn’t resist adding the rest after that. And I love making clothes for them, including these particular outfits. 

Ultimately I would have been thrilled to find the actual WellieWishers playhouse secondhand. 

But I’ve never seen it in any thrift store. And this is retired so it’s as expensive on the secondhand market as it was when it was available new from American Girl. 

I also noticed, when looking at other people’s photos of their dolls using this house, that it’s actually very small. It’s not meant to accomodate all the Wellies. 

So I started looking for an Our Generation brand house, since they make tons of larger-scale doll house playsets. They’re actually made for 18 inch dolls, but they fit 14 inch Wellies a bit better. The Seaside Beach House playset seemed like a good choice. Here’s how it originally looked:

When bought new, it comes with lots of small accessories, mostly food and dishes. The one I found and bought didn’t come with any of the accessories, which was fine. If there were any that I absolutely needed, I could make them. 

Once I acquired it, I got to work with the renovations.

Kendall helped me out, since she’s crafty and likes to make things. 

First I took out the plastic bench. It folds out into a bed that can fit one 18 inch doll or two 14 inch dolls. Then I moved the kitchen around so that the shelves fit under the window and open up the floor, making it all one room instead of two rooms.

This did unfortunately disconnect the power source for the overhead light and all the little kitchen and beach sound buttons. But I plan on replacing them with maybe something better.

Once everything was rearranged, I painted and wallpapered the walls. Then I added all the little accessories. 

With the kitchen moved, the little porthole window is above the sink, which looks nice. I added a roll of paper towels and some hand soap by the sink. 

The Wellies are only six years old and not allowed to have very hot things that can bun, so their stove and oven are for pretend play. 

The fridge is “real” and holds their snacks. To the left of that you can see the oven and underneath that, a second oven that I told the Wellies is actually a dishwasher. I took the handle off until I decide how to make it look like a dishwasher.

With the countertop underneath the row of windows, the plants can get some nice direct sun. To the left of the plants is the girls’ microscope. On the upper shelves are gardening supplies.

Emerson’s job is to water the potted herbs. 

The top shelf is for toys. I had a great time compiling all these mini toys for the girls: two little rabbits, a troll, real metal toy trains, a koosh ball, a slinky, and dinosaurs. The second shelf holds dishes. The bottom shelf has mini American Girl books and magazines, plus some microscope slides, a deck of cards, and a flower press.  

This little bench, and the stuffed lamb, were also recent thrift store finds. My aunt made the two stuffed chickens. I made the felt cactus. 

It’s kind of small and will only sit one Wellie or two smaller dolls, but it’s too cute to not use. 

I made the pom pom rug also. The carpet is a rectangle of soft velour fabric. I’m still undecided whether to use carpet or to make a faux wooden floor. 

The door has a screen in the window, and the window moves up and down to let in a breeze. Attached to the outside screen is a little plastic bug. 

On the right of the door are two seahorse-shaped hooks to hold jackets and hats.

The door locks, too!

There’s still room outside to put up the table and chairs I made for the Wellies last summer. 

And there’s room for younger siblings to come by and play. 

Behind the house is the wooden tree swing, a perfect place to enjoy the evening breeze.

[imabee-oralizard]

This is pt.1 cause of word count.

Palaye concert 4/11/24

Mom and I woke up at 11:30am and started getting ready. Had to do moms hair so it took li her than planned. We left from the apartment at 3pm. Cause of the traffic it took almost 3 hours to drive and we got there at 5:40. Luckily vip hadn’t went yet. Once we all went in we got a signed poster and then waiting to take pictures. Mom got a picture on her phone and I got one on my Sony camera. Palayes friend dude Austin couldn’t figure out how to get to the camera on mom’s phone so I went over to get to the camera. Then he couldn’t figure out how to get my camera on so I turned it on. A lady photographer came over to take the photo on my camera since she knew more. As soon as I went to Palaye Emerson and Remington right away went ‘it’s great to see you’ and Emerson gave me a hug first, then Remington, and Sebastian. But they said that and hugged me like they remembered me. I also gave Remington the letter I’d written. I stuck my hand out and said ‘can I give you this’ while just like staring at him. He took it and said ‘of course’ then slid it into his pocket. It’s the one from the previous concert in September but I added to it and still gave it to him since I wanted to tell him how amazing he is. I stood in between Emerson and Remington for the photo and mom was in between Sebastian and Remington. We also got some of the Fever dream vinyls signed along with the Palaye cd’s and the bastards cd. Then during the concert mom added memory so we didn’t have to worry about photos. I was gonna take some with the Sony but it automatically has a red flash so i didn’t use it. During the concert though I made eye contact with Remington multiple times. He never came over to me to like reach out like he did other people though. But at one point we came over and stood onto the ledge table area that I was standing right next to! He was going to step onto it and I’d moved mom and is hoodies real quick so he had room also since they were black. Had bought them at the concert. They have the picture of Remington with a cigarette in his mouth and the ‘sextape’ over it. Good thing I moved it to because Remington was gonna step right by it and he’d hesitated for a second until I grabbed them. Then he stepped right in front of me! Literally right in front of me. I almost died. Then he went back to the stage after max a minute. Also Sebastian looked at us and the came over to our side of the stage and was posing right in front at the perfect angle so I got some photos of him that I’ll have to edit and they’ll be great. The venue was super small so we were super close to the stage. No hates or anything. Mom and I were in the second row. I couldn’t see Emerson like the whole time cause the angle. I could see him more than mom could but not much. At one point he got up and started playing the guitar but I couldn’t see him aside of the other guitarist being in front of him. I also told the guy to move so I could see Emerson. After that song he went back to the guitar. The last song they played was lonely I think. Got a picture of the set list at the start also. During the concert Remington came out to be there for the pit. He also climbed on top of people. Then he also hung upside down and then sung on the ceiling. I yelled to Emerson but he didn’t look over. He also didn’t answer much during the vip question and answer. Was told by someone that he was sick. They did say that they have a new album coming out in June and will be back over here this fall. After the concert we got some posters off the wall along with two guitar pics from the workers. Then we went outside and I got a picture with Remington and a signature on the sign. Also got the same with Sebastian. I know mom took bad photos. I also asked her to take a photo on my camera and she somehow got that blurry. I have no clue how because it’s hard for me to get it blurry. Sebastian heard her say it was blurry though and he said he’d retake the photo in second. We did but she just took it on her phone instead. Didn’t see Emerson sadly.

[bookshelf-dust]

lovely boy.

gareth emerson x gn!reader

word count: 1,565

warnings: swearing, smoking (don’t even think about it), mentions of anxiety and insecurities, comfort and fluff

a/n: hi! this has been in my drafts for months. but alas, i have finished it. read it, don’t read it, that’s up to you. i’ll love you either way <333

————

Gareth had you sat on the couch, leather cool against the bare skin of your thighs.

He was across from you, settled on the ottoman. His leg was bouncing, his hands rubbing against one another.

You weren’t sure what was going on, but you didn’t like it. For the first time in your entire relationship with Gareth, you felt unwelcome. Like you weren’t meant to be here. Like you’d done something terribly wrong.

He almost looked mean.

Eventually, he broke the silence in the room.

“I think we should break up.”

Your stomach dropped out of your ass.

What? Break up? Why?

You felt your palms go clammy, and a chill ran down your back. You were starting to panic.

You locked eyes with him. “Um—” you were struggling to get your thoughts in order, “Can you tell me why you think that? Maybe keep me in the loop here?”

Gareth coughed, ran a hand down his surprisingly stubbly face.

“It’s you, really.”

His words were laced with venom. He’d never spoken to you in this way before, in that tone. Like you were something nasty.

“You’re so…so whiny. You’ve been so fragile, lately? And you’re so anxious, all the time, always worried about every little thing. Frankly, I’m just sick of hearing about it, of having to comfort you and pretend I give a shit.”

Your eyes filled with tears, your nose started to sting. Why was he being so mean to you? Your Gare, was treating you like a nuisance.

“I have to order for you.” He held his hands up, starting to count off reasons he was done with you, apparently. “You’re always hanging on to me, like I’m a fucking lifeline or something. You overthink everything. Not everything has to be a fucking ordeal, you know.”

“Don’t get me started on when we have to go to sleep. I just—you’re a burden, Y/N.”

Gareth stood up, walking up to you and bending at the waist in order to be level with your face. He wiped a tear off your cheek with his thumb, his brow furrowing as he did so.

“The thing is, sweetheart, I don’t love you anymore.”

Your breath hitched and you pushed Gareth’s hand away from your face, but that only made him smile.

He was fucking grinning, and it was full of malice. It was like he was getting off on hurting you.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe. Gareth was your world, your everything, the only person who’d ever provided you with such support, and now he was telling you that it’d been an act?

Shit, you were gonna be sick.

And then you woke up.

It had been a dream. A nightmare.

But the feeling of almost being sick was real, and it was what had woke you up. That dream had really put you through it.

You were sweating, legs stuck to the sheets, everything sticky. Your heart was pounding, your head throbbing. You looked over, realizing you were still alone in bed.

Gareth hadn’t even come to bed yet.

You realized that it was one in the morning, and you’d only been asleep for about an hour. Tonight Gare had the boys over for band practice, and they usually stayed over super late catching up and smoking. It was their certified “guys night,” not that they ever called it that, and it certainly didn’t have any rules.

You’d eaten with them, listened to most of practice, but you’d had a long day, and couldn’t stay up anymore, so you went to bed. None of them minded, Gareth evening venturing down the hall to talk to you as you got ready for bed and give you a sweet kiss before he went back to his friends.

But none of that mattered now. You were hurt and upset, even if it had just been a fucking dream.

Your hands were shaking as you threw the covers off of yourself, the wood floors cold on your feet. You stood, wrenching open the bedroom door and walking down the hall.

Your eyes scanned the counter for the cigarettes you knew Gareth had left there, and you swiped them, along with his Zippo, before making your way outside, accidentally slamming the door shut a bit harder than you’d meant to.

The little apartment that the both of you were living in wasn’t very big, and the only reason you had two bedrooms was so there’d be a place for Gareth’s drums. It did have a little patio, though, which is where the boys were currently sitting.

They heard the slam of the front door as you plopped down on the stoop, and all four of them silenced—listening. Eddie raised his eyebrows, looking at Gareth who shrugged.

The patio was on the side of the apartment, not far from the front door, which didn’t make eavesdropping hard. They were quiet enough that they could hear you flick the lighter open and shut.

Gareth’s brow furrowed, and he handed the remainder of the cigarette he was holding back to Jeff, who he’d been sharing it with, so that he could finish it.

“Something’s wrong. They haven’t smoked in months.”

Eddie nodded, clearly worried about you, since you’d been fine enough to argue with him about Metallica songs earlier in the night.

He stood, and the rest followed, heading out. Gareth rounded the corner of the apartment, making his way to you on the steps. You were halfway through a second cigarette.

He stopped in front of you, looking over your body for any sign that you were hurt. It was when his eyes made it to your face, where tears glinted in the outdoor light that he got scared.

He squatted, leveling himself with you. Just like he had in your dream. It made you jump, and he caught the movement.

“Hey, sugar what’s the matter, huh?” His hands found your bare legs, rubbing up and down to try and warm you up. Now wasn’t the time to scold you for sitting outside in the cold with shorts on. If he could feel the tackiness of sweat on your thighs, he didn’t say anything.

You finished your cigarette, snuffing it out against the concrete of the stairs.

You shook your head, and as you blinked, more tears slipped down your cheeks.

“You can tell me, Y/N, it’s okay, I promise.”

You tried to breathe.

“I had a nightmare.”

He nodded, thinking it must have been pretty damn shitty for you to be in this state. His hands were rough on your legs, still rubbing away. “You wanna go inside and talk about it? It’s cold out here.”

He leaned in like was going to tell you a secret, “And I don’t know if you noticed, but you haven’t got shoes on.”

That got the smallest of grins out of you, enough for you to allow him to pull you up and take you in, finding refuge in your warm living room.

Gareth sat cross legged on the floor in front of you, waiting patiently for you to relay what was upsetting you.

“I dreamt that you wanted to break up with me.”

His breath hitched and his cheeks flush in worry, but he didn’t say anything, allowing you to continue.

“Everything that I’m insecure about, you told me made me a burden. All those things you help me with? Ordering and anxiety and overthinking? You said I was too clingy, too fragile. Too everything, really.”

“You said you didn’t love me anymore. And you didn’t care that I was upset. You were being so mean. It was like you were enjoying treating me that way. And then I woke up.”

Gareth took a deep breath and moved to sit next to you on the couch.

“What an asshole.”

That made you laugh. “You’re talking about yourself, you know.”

“I know. Nightmare me is a total dickhead. He’s fucking horrendous.”

Gareth planted a kiss on your forehead, but as he pulled away, he looked a little stressed. “You okay?”

“I’m okay. Just upset. You, my lovely boy, turned into my big insecurity monster was not enjoyable.”

He ran his hands up and down your arms soothingly. “Bad dreams suck, baby. I’m sorry about this one, especially since it was me. But I want you to know that I’m right here. I want you. I always want you. I love you and I’m not going anywhere.”

“And I love all the things about you that dream me didn’t.” He tapped the tip of your nose, making you scrunch it in response.

His big Gareth smile was always enough to almost bring you to your knees.

Your teary smile almost did the same to him. “Thank you for putting up with me. For taking care of me and making me feel safe.”

You sniffled and he kept smiling at you. He looked absolutely lovesick. Over the moon for you. “I love you too, Gareth.”

“Right back at you sweet thing. Now, would you like a piggyback ride to bed?”

You grinned excitedly, standing up on the couch so you could hop on his back. He positioned himself in front of you, hoisting you up by your thighs to get you settled.

Halfway down the hall, he said, “You called me your lovely boy. I quite liked that. You should do it more often.”

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

[codename-adler]

tell me everything abt Dakota Emerson

16: Dakota Emerson (21) USC Trojans Striker

Dare I say Allison's biggest competition? Drop-dead gorgeous bi icon blondie turning heads all around, and she'll kick your ass too. But she's also an academic monster. Allison would absolutely loathe her.

Dakota's education goes like this: Double BA in Gender and Sexuality Studies + Political Science; then an MA in Political Science and International Relations; then a PhD in the same fields; plus a side Minor in Legal Studies, as well as a Minor in Queer Studies and Gender & Social Justice. (i do not know the US school system, i did my best)

The only ones who got her beat are Gabby and Namrita. Needless to say, Dakota is their #1 fan always. Absolute fangirl behavior. They would have been a dangerous trio of brainiac bffs if it weren't for Dakota's overbearing enthusiasm and awkwardness when it comes to those two. But Dakota's been at it since she was a Freshman, so they're more used to it now. She's still a lot.

But apart from Gabby and Namrita, Dakota is so fucking impossible. She's got a comeback for everything. She does not take your shit. She'll tear you a new one if you even insinuate something degrading or hateful. It's a good thing she is dedicated body and soul to her studies and Exy because she does not have friends (yet). She doesn't really mind nor care, but once she gets one or two close friends for the first time, she'll understand what she's been missing.

She's so deep into studies all the time, a whirlwind, a fucking handful. She is very stressed, but that does not keep her from acing everything and looking flawless all the time. It's very irritating for the others, to see her succeed so well and still looking like that. She always has a heavy-ass manual with her she can beat you up with.

Don't you fucking dare compare her to Hermione Granger or she'll make you rue the day you were born without even putting her hands on you.

She's very hot and cold. Hot for smarts and cold for losers and bigots. She's fired up every game, every presentation, but her icy stare is scary af when it lands on you. You just know you fucked up.

Of course, her competitive trait and overachieving personality come from strict, demanding parents. Only child, she could never escape their scrutinization. She didn't grow up overly rich or poor per se, but if she wanted something, she had to get it herself. All the funding came from her; all the scholarships she received were thanks to her own hustling. She never got help. A severe, absent father and a criticizing trophy-wife mother; she never had the choice to be anything but the best. Jeremy and her actually bond a lot over that, once Dakota lets her pristine facade down a little bit for him to peek through. Fortunately for her, though, and miraculously, she was able to forge her own drive, aiming to surpass her parents, and well on her way to to just that and more, but without the usual burnout or mental breakdown. She's tough. Wish that was me. Although she's 110% all in for both Exy and her studies, the balance of mental and physical work probably has something to do with how well-adjusted and thriving she is.

Oh and she sings also. Because why would she stop there. She's so good it's annoying. Designated lullaby singer on away games.

Striker position because it's the flashiest and one that runs the most around. The crowds love her. She really knows how to hype 'em up.

Dakota is very well-spoken, informed, serious, true to herself and unapologetic. She can be intimidating, exhausting, dizzying, impressive, relentless and ruthless. Her eyes are really something. Big brown pools of knowledge. She got big dreams, big brain and big muscles. No ass no titties unfortunately. Oh well. That's never stopped her before. Her aura is big enough to compensate this slight lacking.

Inspos include: Angèle (singer), Manon Demissy (SKAM FR), Samara Weaving (specifically in Ready Or Not), Hannah Dodd, Amy March, Jo March, Annabeth Chase.

-- Trojan OCs lineup here --

[flowers-for-em]

chapter 1 of shattered innocence

one of my videos is based off this :)

Ezra

~

It happened on September 24. 

The day my already crumbling life fell apart even more. 

And all because of 

H E R.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I push the school doors open and walk inside ignoring the stares that follow. They burn into my neck and brand me. 

I walk past the whispering students, the resentful teachers, everyone. 

I used to be not popular but not an outcast either. I was known, teachers smiled at me, people waved and said hello. Not anymore. The only hope for a word from anyone now is a teacher telling me I have homework. But even then it isn't more than a few sentences.

When I reach my locker, I don't bother to look at the hateful words written, taped, stuffed on and inside it. 

Just one more.

One more step.

One more day.

You can do it.

Just one more.

I pull out my books and wish to every god that has ever existed to bring back Emerson. She is my best friend. My ride or die. My everything. And she had left for an overseas trip to France, a eight week ballet workshop, just before the incident. Emmie deserves it though. Its her dream to go to one of these workshops and she had finally made it happen. I'm proud of her. She texts me relentlessly, making sure I'm okay, but no matter how much she wants to come home, I refuse to let her give up her dream. 

So I wait. Wait for her to come home. Another two weeks and she'll be home and I doubt I'll ever be let out of her sight. 

I smile softly and look at the photo - slightly crinkled but still bright - of me and Emerson standing out the front of the local ice cream shop with sundaes and goofy smiles. We were twelve. 

"Why is she even smiling? Planning her next murder?" That wipes the smile of my face. Because when you've been accused of murder you can't be happy. Can't even smile. Why should a monster be able to be happy? 

I shut my locker and turn to walk to my homeroom the crowd of students parting like the red sea when I walk by. 

One more class. 

I silently walk into the classroom head down hugging my books to my chest like your average nerd in the movies. The room quiets, and the whispers start. The bells rings.

The homeroom teacher Mrs. Owen quiets the class and starts role call. 

And then she arrives. 

Lacey Burgess walks into the classroom with a bright smile on her face, waving at the teacher. "Sorry Ms. I dropped all my books and it took a while to pick them up." Anyone with their head screwed on right would see that that was a lie. But Lacey being Lacey Mrs. Owen just smiles and nods her head continuing role.

Lacey smiles and makes her way to the back of the classroom where her seat was saved by her friends. Her eyes flick to me once almost in pity. But I don't want it, not from her anyway.

The interesting thing about being framed for murder is that everyone hates you - that's fucking obvious - but usually they hate your family as well. It doesn't apply to Lacey apparently though. As soon as it was said I was a killer, people were reaching out to her to say they were sorry she was even half related to a monster. They were saying sorry to her. 

Her Mom, even my fucking Father. They were sorry he had unwillingly raised a monster. 

But he is the monster. 

Lacey is  the monster. 

Pippa  is the monster.

But no one would ever believe the girl who killed Mr. Winter; the richest man in the state let alone the town. Not when her supposed "family" are supporting the Winters. Telling them that I'm the killer. That they'll do anything to help. 

Not then.

"Ezra?" The sound snaps me out of my hateful thoughts. The bell must've rung already because the classroom was empty. 

"Yes?" I say my voice quiet, I'm still looking at my battered converse.

"Are you all right dear?" My eyes fly up, thinking that Mrs. Owen was actually asking that. But instead I'm met with my second favourite person on the planet. Mrs. Barnes. My singing teacher and the only person who - though not publicly - doesn't think that I'm a killer. 

I take a deep breath. 

One more smile. 

"I'm fine, just lost in thought," I say, looking over her shoulder to see Mrs. Owen tapping away on her computer. 

"Okay, let me walk you to your next class alright?" I don't have the energy to respond so I just nod and smile weakly. 

Collecting my stuff we both walk out of the classroom towards the science block. Its comfortable silence. Her presence is nice, reminding me that at least one person here didn't hate me to the core. She still gives me lessons every week in her music room after school as not to be caught by anyone else. 

I don't know why she does it. Or why I still like her. She only supports me in private - but I guess it's better than nothing.

Mrs. Barnes drops me off at the classroom and I walk in finding my seat at the back of the class with what I call the Ezra bubble. A certain amount of seats and desks that will remain empty unless a teacher asks someone to sit there. 

I zone out when the teacher starts to talk. Somehow still writing notes and reminders down. Science is fun - when you're doing the crazy shit experiments - not the theory. 

The rest of the day is a blur of whispers and stares, hiding in the library at lunch, forfeiting food for quiet. 

When the final bell rings. I practically launch out of my seat to get out of here. Grabbing everything from my locker and getting on the bus - do you remember that one scene in the Lego Ninjago movie when Lloyd is sitting on one side of the bus and everyone else is on the other? Just imagine that, but a hundred times shittier. 

I look out the window and watch as Lacey flirts with some jock I can't be bothered to name and gets in her car driving off. Lacey gets a car. I get a whole side of a bus. Who's winning now Lacey? 

Still her. 

Our relationship dynamic is like that; Lacey, the golden child the one everyone likes. And me; the child that's just there, and now is a murderer. 

One more stop. 

I just want this shitty day to end so I can call Emerson and hear all her gossip about France. She'd had taken a particular liking to a french boy the last time we talked. 

The bus pulls up outside of my street and I quickly get off, ignoring the fact that as soon as I got off everyone went back to their normal seats and that the bus driver seemed to shut the door quicker than usual as if he's stopping the air around me from staying in the bus.

I walk down the street and... yes the driveway is vacant no one is home. My so called "family" are all out somewhere. 

I'd never thought of Stefan Charleston as a Dad figure much. Before I found out about the cheating and shit he did, he was never around so it was just me and Mom. Then Mom died and Pippa and Lacey moved in. And to top it all off, Lacey was my half-sister who was the same age. I had lost all respect for Stefan Charleston that day. Three weeks after Mom dies you invite your mistress to live with you, the same mistress you've been hooking up with for the last fifteen years before Mom died. Its shit and I seriously hope he knows it. 

Once I'm inside the house and away from the hateful glares of the neighbours who come outside to make sure Lacey gets home safely everyday. I run up the stairs and collapse onto my bed throwing my bag across the room not caring if the books inside are ruined. 

School is shit. 

And everybody knows it. 

Heh, that rhymed maybe I should run away to Paris and become some big time songwriter. I pull out my phone and dial Emerson's number, she answers on the first ring. 

"Hey babes!" Its so nice to here the voice of someone who doesn't hate me. 

"Hey, Emmie! How are you?" I ask a smile already creeping onto my face. 

"You remember that french boy Pierre?" 

"Yeah, was he the one who had the paint all over him?" 

"Yes! And anyway he asked me out! I said yes of course because he was hot- who wouldn't? And he took me to the Eiffel Tower at night! It was so romantic!!" I roll onto my stomach and listen to Emerson as she rambles about her date. Its funny how one person can calm me so much with their voice.

"Oh and he also took me onto his mother's balcony to stargaze! It was so romantic and we had to sneak out at dawn." 

"So you like, like, him?" I ask a smile fully overtaking my face. 

"Yes! It was so romantic!" Emerson is most definitely a little puppy when it comes to love. She gets excited and her energy is infectious. Its quiet for a few moments before she asks. "How are you doing Ez?" 

"I'm doing good," I lie. 

"Ezra." 

"Fine?"

"Ezra." 

"Catastrophically in danger of being thrown off a bridge?" 

Emerson sighs, "Will you let me come home yet? The last two weeks are honestly nothing special, we're just showcasing the skills we've learnt. I can come home and showcase my skills to you, I don't need some judgemental Parisians to do it." 

"Emerson Morgan. No. You have worked way to hard to let this dream go and I'm not going to let you give it up. Not even for me." 

"You're being accused of fucking murder. So yes I can give my dream up for that. Because its currently fucking you against the world Ezra. And I'll be damned if I let you go through this alone. You're my best friend. I don't give a shit if the town hates me I'm not letting you do this on your own. And I will-" 

"Emmie," I say softly. She quiets. "I love you, but please don't do this, just finish the course then come home, please do that for me. Stay in Paris for two more weeks I'll be fine." Lie. I won't be fine, but I can make it through. "Go on another date with Pierre, I'm sure-." 

"I made him up. Well not entirely, I just wanted you to think I'm actually doing well and having fun instead of worrying about you every spare second."  

We're quiet for a few minutes. 

"Emmie." 

She sighs, "Okay, I'll stay. But that doesn't mean this is over Ezra." 

"I know. We'll have this exact same conversation tomorrow." 

"Mhm." 

We talk for a bit longer before I hear the front door jingle, Lacey's home, we say our goodbyes and I hang up before walking over to my desk and opening my school bag and pulling out books, shoving them onto my desk and starting on my math homework. 

I swear to god whoever put letters in math needs to have a conversation with whoever decided to give women's clothes fake pockets, maybe they both have the same evil thoughts about torturing the human race. 

"Yes, I know Clara, its soo gay." Lacey's voice appears outside of my door, on the phone to one of the girls in her posey. "No, because they were making out, I don't know why some would be making out with another guy and then as soon as they're caught say that he's not gay."  

She talking about Josh Hunters the captain of the lacrosse team. He's definitely gay - just in his denial era. 

"Okay C honey, I'll call you back I've got to talk to her now. Yes, I will be safe don't worry. No, you do not need to let the police know where I am. I'll be fine." She hangs up and walks into my room. 

Lacey is the stereotypical popular blonde girl. Fake everything, extensions, nails, personality (I'm pretty sure I've heard her talking shit about Clara before), everything. 

"Whatcha working on?" She asks.

"Math."

"Ugh I hate math, I got Peppa to do the homework for me." She looks around my room. "Have you ever though about re-decorating in here?"

"What do you want Lacey?" 

"Oh yeah right, Mom and Dad want to have a talk when we get home tonight, to go over the story again. You can't have any cracks in your performance." 

They want me to lie in court. Aren't they just the best?

"Okay." 

"Great see you later Ezra make sure you get that homework done." 

I think if I spend another day in this house I'll actually murder someone. 

I pick up my phone and look at the texts I had sent. Seven of them, one to my grandmother, and the others to my Aunts and Uncles. We have all met before and used to go on large family day trips with my Mom. No responses yet. So now I wait.

[lucassinclaer]

jancy + 18 ❤️

okay so first off this was so goddamn fun!! tysm for sending this! second, this isn't proof read and i hope it actually fits, adkfjhadf

send me a things you said prompt

18. things you said when you were scared

There’s this thing Jonathan does when he looks at Nancy. She likes to think of it as the photographer's eye. Sometimes people don’t say what they’re really thinking. But you capture the right moment, it says more. Ever since they'd entered each other's orbit he hadn’t needed a camera to make her feel that seen. It's just him and that uncanny observance he has, laying her bare with a look. 

When things are fine it’s a triumph, a string he plucks that makes something in her chest sing. But it's the thing that undoes her when it gets worse.  

It’s what gives him the ability to leave her speechless in the woods. It’s what coils around her heart like barbed wire when she’s scared. It’s what makes her cry into his chest. Or it’s what makes her lash out when she isn’t ready for it. 

The quick burning anger in her resents it with an acidic meanness. “I never would have thought you were a coward,” she tells him as her thoughts clamor to justify the words as they tumble out of her mouth. Because she can’t stand that gaze, needs to disarm him like he disarms her. She just wants him to feel this same helplessness. Loving Jonathan has always meant this excruciating vulnerability. Cost and reward in one. 

It works. The repentance of him turns in a complicated twist of his features. “My mom, my siblings—they need me, Nancy! And I couldn’t risk you giving up your dreams for me, but I can’t just leave them.” 

She scoffs. The answer of a martyr. A better person than her who's never let leaving Mike or Holly behind stop her from pursuing her ambitions. 

But there’s a different kind of fury in her, too. Less sudden, less prone to pass in a few minutes when she'll regret what she's saying. Something different. 

“What about your dreams?” she asks. 

He looks like she slapped him. Actually taken aback. Like this time she's the one who might have exposed him. It’s hard not to find a kind of sickening satisfaction in that. 

“What?” 

“What about,” she repeats slowly, feeling control come back to her, “your dreams? You used to talk about NYU. All the time.” He says nothing. Somehow, it unfurls more of that simmering rage. “You think I don’t know you, Jonathan? You think that I don’t know that no matter what, Emerson or California, you were already giving up?”  

He stares at her, then looks away and she wants to scream for him to face her but the wave of fury she'd felt had broken over her head and everything else was dragging behind in its wake.  

“It was a stupid kid's dream,” he says and Nancy’s heart breaks. He’s never looked young to her before. Most times he reflected her own age, sometimes he'd look older than he should be. Never like this.  

Like a boy who's afraid. Scared out of his mind. Of leaving behind his family for something to befall them. Of not succeeding. Of being left behind. Of falling into a pattern he can’t escape, dragging everybody with him. 

Silence stretches between them and he shrinks in on himself more and more. 

“Jonathan.” She longs to reach out and twist her hands into his shirt to pull him close, but it's not the time. They can do that later and she can wrap her arms around him and card a hand through his hair and mourn for the little boy who felt he needed to leave his hopes behind for other people. “I don’t want you to sacrifice everything for me either. And neither does your mom. Or Will. Or El.” 

The anger has passed over her and left the wreckage of fear that must inevitably be faced. “Can we just start there?” 

[darkwing-katy]

Y’all.

I legit just had a dream where I literally locked Leland in the bathroom of my parents’ house because, and I quote myself, “if you’re in this house, then I can keep you safe from the series finale.”

Like it was a dream where the main characters were all at my parents’ place (the trio, all of the girls, Sister Andrea), and then even fricking Andy showed up (and I said, “Oh, thank God, we’re fixing that plot thing, too!”). And I was holding my faux niece and looking out the kitchen window and I saw Leland walking by, and we made eye contact, and I smiled at him and he smiled back, even though he looked confused. Then my sister and I went outside (me because I wanted to look for him, her because she was sus about me) and we saw characters from The Umbrella Academy and were like, “OMG, are the Kings fixing the ending of that show, too?!?” (Note that I have never seen a single episode of that show; I just have seen the reactions to the finale here on tumblr).

Then everyone else came outside and Leland tried to murder Kristen with an ice pick and I blocked him with a water bottle, and Andy wrangled the ice pick away from him and I was all, “Don’t kill him!!! We need him alive if we’re going to survive this!!!” So Andy gave me an exasperated look and dragged him inside and threw him into the bathroom, where I shut the door and decided to guard it to make sure no one else tried to kill him or he couldn’t try to kill anyone. My sister was side-eying me the whole time (she knew I had a thing for him), and then while I was at the door, I saw he had a knife (looked like the garden knife from Merge Mansion).

He started going all therapist on me—asking me why I saved him, if I was attracted to men who killed, if I wanted to become a killer myself, and I was all, “Look, dude, I had a therapist on BetterHelp for three years. You’re trying to therapist me and it won’t work.” Then I added, “I need you to survive this. No one else wants you to, but I do, and the only way that’s gonna happen is if you stay in here.”

“But why does it matter so much to you?”

“Because I have a thing for psychopaths with pretty blue eyes. Now give me the knife if you want me to talk Kristen out of tazering you.”

Come to think of it, I also might have outright told him, “Michael Emerson has pretty eyes and I’m not letting his character die.”

Y’all. I am not ready for this series finale in any way, shape, or form.