#lorca x burnham

[cocodavie]

[star-trek-fandom-confessions]

#275

"Mariner x Locarno, Burnham x Lorca, B'Elanna x Vorik, and Khan x Marla are my guilty pleasure ships. I'm not saying these guys deserved a happy ending because frankly, the women deserve better, but I do like said pairings for the character dynamics and interactions."

[disco-bang]

Author sign ups for Disco Bang close in one week!

Now that the show has come to an end, is there a story you wish the show had explored further? A ship you wish had set sail? A plot bunny that won't stop gnawing on your shoes? Join us for @disco-bang, a Star Trek Discovery big bang challenge!

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[juuls]

Juulna’s 2021 Multi-Fandom Fanfiction Rec List - Part Four

(Yes, I realize this is a year late, but this year's been a bit nuts. I still hope you enjoy these fics anyway!)

Based only on what I’ve read with my own eyes this year!

Follow me on my journey into what, at times, was…

…actually rather calming! Perhaps you can find some comfort and entertainment, fluff and angst and romance and friendship, smut and a distinct lack of it, space adventures and fantasy and modern adventures, serial killers and good guys, redemption and reconciliation and learning to become someone completely different — there is so much here I read that stuck with me over the past year, and the 2021 Fanfic Reading Challenge ( @fanfic-reading-challenge ) allowed me a new way to keep track of all of my favourites. So props to that event! Definitely participating again (considering I run the event, yeah, that's probably a given lol, but full disclosure).

Without further ado, here were my 2021 fic favourites!

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six

Fandom: Potterverse

Bilmione:

Lady in Red by JamieOlivier

After a year of secretly being in love with Hermione, Bill finally gets a chance to show her how he feels. But what will happen between them when they're faced with the consequences of their night together?

Dramionarry:

Fourteen Thousand Galleons by @frumpologist

After the War, there is a boom of marriage and divorce. Hermione finds herself among the statistics of war heroes who couldn’t save their marriages. When she receives the invoice from her solicitor, she has no choice but to answer an ad in The Daily Prophet: Malfoy Heir Seeking Nanny.

But, everything is not quite what it seems as Hermione navigates the waters of post-divorce life.

GES Winner 2020: Best Love Story

Dramione:

The Library of Alexandria by @senlinyu

The Library of Alexandria is not for just any witch or wizard. Many bookworms may try but few are permitted to pass through its doors. The books residing there are ancient and powerful and, if one happens to make a mistake, the consequences can be rather—novel.

Height by @senlinyu

“Tall? That’s what you think I should notice about Malfoy? His height?”

Ginny quirked an eyebrow and licked the tip of her quill suggestively. ”Well, isn’t that your thing? Lockhart. Krum. McLaggen. Ron. The only thing they have in common is being tall enough to give me a neck ache.”

Hermione felt her ears grow hot, and she gripped her book tighter. “I don’t have a thing for tall men. Their height is—completely coincidental.”

Dramione Height Differences Minifest 2020.

The Malaria Visions by @heymanticore

Hermione has a series of vivid dreams about Draco Malfoy after taking anti-malarial medication. Can she reconcile the real Draco with the one she sees when she sleeps?

Presque Toujours Pur by ShayaLonnie

Bellatrix's torture of Hermione uncovers a long-kept secret. The young witch learns her true origins in a story that shows the beginning and end of the Wizarding wars as Hermione learns about her biological father and the blood magic he dabbled in that will control her future.

Remione:

Those Who Can, Teach by @inlovewithforever

“You do realize,” he spoke measuredly, “how absolutely insane you sound, trying to protect the long-gone virtue of your nearly forty-year-old professor? Who happens to be a werewolf?”

“You’re not my professor. Not anymore.” --- Dirty little Remione one-shot featuring gratuitous use of erotic poetry as foreplay. Canon divergent from the beginning of Deathly Hallows.

Moonlight by @kittenshift-17

Coming to call on a werewolf hours before the full moon rises has unexpected consequences for the brightest witch of the age. Hermione never expected that Remus would ever let her get so close, but the allure of moonlight finally proves too much for the lycanthrope to resist. Remione.

Hungry Like the Wolf by @iamtarasoleil

"Where am I?" she demanded, though her voice still shook slightly from embarrassment. "My flat, obviously," the man replied with equal unease. "Who are you? Why are you here? … And why would you turn such a bloody awful record into a portkey?"

Siremione:

A cautionary tale. Or: why you should never bet with Sirius Black by theGoddessofSamothrace

Hermione has lived with two of the most eligible bachelors of the wizarding world for two years now. Remus Lupin and Sirius Black invited her to live with them when her relationship with Ron Weasley collapsed and she gratefully accepted. The household works for all three of them: there is someone at home when she gets back from work, Remus has an intellectual sparring partner and Sirius is kept in line just a little more when there's a woman in the house. But what happens when this comfortable setting is disturbed by a very, very bad decision on the part of a certain miss Granger?

Stay by nymueladyofthelake

Hermione finds herself targeted by a law, a Muggleborn Registration Act being led by Dolores Umbridge. Sirius and Hermione immediately form a marriage bond to protect her from receiving the trace. Remus isn't sure what that will mean for their pack bond or for his relationship with Sirius. The Order tries to circumvent the dark plans Voldemort has for all muggleborns.

The Sun, The Moon and The Star by @ladyblack3

WINNER! of Mischief Managed Awards 2018: Best Soul Bond Fic. Eight years after the war, life at Grimmauld place is settled for the widowed Remus, his metamorphmagus son, and the brightest witch of her age. What happens when they uncover that they yet may return a lost Marauder? What will Moony have to say about all of this? And was this their fate all along? Triad, HG/RL/SB!

Sirimione:

This Dizzy Life of Mine by @inlovewithforever

Hermione wants desperately to make the world a better place. Sirius wants more than anything for Hermione to take him, well, seriously.

AU in which Voldemort never existed, but blood prejudice and anti-Muggle sentiments reign supreme.

Looking Like a High I Want to Be On by weary_kind

It wasn’t the Wizarding World’s happiness that kept her out of Diagon Alley, not exactly. It was the news articles that were written about her during the divorce. They weren’t written about Harry. Or Ron... Just her.

Being as well-known as she was, the Daily Prophet had paid close attention to her relationship. Especially the end of it. How exactly they got ahold of her medical records from St. Mungos was anyone’s guess. But they had.

Sirimione & Remione:

The Debt of Time by ShayaLonnie

When Hermione finds a way to bring Sirius back from the veil, her actions change the rest of the war. Little does she know her spell restoring him to life provokes magic she doesn't understand and sets her on a path that ends with a Time-Turner.

SSHG:

Meta: The Not-So-Comprehensive Guide to Hermione/Severus Clichés in Fanfiction by Electryone

The majority of HG/SS plotlines in under 500 words each. Time-turners added!

The Witchhiker's Guide to Beltane by TeddyRadiator

Wizarding Britain, ten years after the war. Things are good, but the Ministry thinks what's needed is a good old fashioned Beltane revel. Hogwarts is just the place to do it. In the meantime, Severus isn't enjoying life right now; he's the subject of Rita Skeeter's new tell-all book. And don't get Hermione started on how Ron continues to make her life a misery. Perhaps this Beltane stuff may just be the ticket to help them out as well. Written for Jenidralph in the winter 2013 LiveJournal SSHG_Prompfest.

SSHG & Drarry:

The Problem With Purity by Phoenix.Writing

As Hermione, Harry, and Ron are about to begin their seventh and final year at Hogwarts, they learn some surprising and dangerous information regarding what it means to be Pure in the wizarding world. HG/SS with H/D. AU after OotP.

SSHGRL (Snape, Hermione, Remus):

Snow Turns The World Deaf by TeddyRadiator

Severus has always believed that, if you love someone, you must promise them the moon, and deliver it. How do you wrestle that moon to the ground?

Fandom: Fantastic Beasts

Gramander:

Masquerade by @prosodiical

MACUSA's annual New Year's Eve Masquerade Ball is the largest, most magical event of the year - and Newt, dressed to the nines and miserably bored, really just wants to leave.

But when a handsome man in a wampus mask comes to his rescue, Newt finds himself very quickly swept away.

Five Times They Weren't, and One Time They Totally Were by Anonymous

Tina is beginning to think that this fiancé act is a getting a bit suspicious. But that can't be right; she just has an overactive imagination. Surely Percival Graves isn't serious when he calls Newt Scamander his 'betrothed'. Right?

Roar by @elenothar

After Graves' fourth escape attempt Grindelwald decides that turning the man into a magical creature - a process thought to be impossible to reverse - will take care of the problem quite nicely. Too bad he didn't anticipate Newt Scamander.

You Told Me Fortunes In American Slang by kopperblaze

Fill for this prompt on the Kink Meme:

Newt's dislike to looking someone in the eye and his aversion to human touch (that is not part of his family) is the result of someone playing an ugly prank on him when he was little. It's also the main reason that Theseus Scamander is a huge momma bear concerning all matters related to Newt.

After Graves is found and healed, he gets to know Newt a little better and falls in love. He quickly realises that Newt has been hurt in the past even without the constant messages from Theseus that hell is going to rain down on anyone in MACUSA even looking the wrong way at Newt.

I want to see Percival slowly gaining Newt's trust, then becoming part of his family and after months of careful wooing finally having his personal happy end.

Bonus: Newt has been in love with Graves for years hearing tales from his brother. The incident with Grindelwald was a huge blow to his ego until he realised that it wasn't Graves. Still he's too shy to make any first move towards the real Graves that is more than friendship.

Fandom: Star Trek

Michael Burnham/Mirror Gabriel Lorca:

Hearts Like Ours by justrunthroughthenightglo

When Prime Gabriel Lorca finds himself on the USS Discovery, he must prove to the crew that he is trustworthy, acclimate to being back in his own universe, solve a mystery which begins with Mirror Landry's ongoing scheme, and figure out why he feels so incredibly drawn to Specialist Michael Burnham.

Light your tinsel moon by @lesspopped

A mysterious phenomenon temporarily takes out the eyesight of Discovery's human crew. Everyone is looking for ways to burn off energy; Lorca and Burnham find a certain amount of freedom in the circumstances.

The Other by LadyFangs

Everyone has a secret. Some deeper than others. Sometimes, objects in the mirror are far closer and much more similar than they appear.

In which Prime Gabriel Lorca returns to his rightful universe only to discover that everything he thought he knew, and loved, is changed.

Michael Burnham/Christopher Pike:

The Other Half by @alethialia

Pike nodded. "You should let the crew know. We'll switch badges and get new uniforms to make it as clear as possible. I'll need to walk Kat through this one myself, though; some of the crustier admirals are gonna have a nutty."

Saru blinked; if he'd been harboring any doubts that he was talking to Pike, they clearly evaporated at the phrase "have a nutty" coming from Michael's mouth.

In the sudden silence: "Okay, but body-swapping?" Tilly asked, her tone hitting the sheer ridiculousness of it.

Tough Love by @alethialia

"Are you harboring a romantic interest in the captain?" Spock asked from across the mess hall table, eyes trained on her evenly, all-knowing.

They had been eating lunch. Eating lunch and finally talking and that had somehow led to...this.

Michael stared at Spock, completely thrown. "...what?"

Series: Respite by @alethialia

The Terran Pike comes to visit the newly-resurrected Captain Burnham on the Shenzhou and things get...heated.

The Trouble With Spores by @elenothar

One moment Michael Burnham is walking alongside Captain Pike in the dusk that comes startlingly early on Stellanis, contemplating suggesting they call off the fruitless search for their strange readings’ origins – the next she steps over some protruding roots and the world explodes into particles of light.

An away mission gone sideways leaves Michael and Pike unable to exceed a certain radius from each other. Turns out that keeping her feelings for him under wraps is easier said than done when occupying the same set of quarters.

No going back. by @wearethewitches

When it seems like the only way to further progress a negotiation between two Acamarian tribes is to let them plan a cross-culture wedding, Michael Burnham volunteers to be their guinea pig bride.

Her supposed fiance? Christopher Pike.

Stars, hide your fire by @wearethewitches

When Michael Burnham's Vulcan husband comes aboard the Discovery, it is discovered that things are not what they seem - and it may be up to Christopher Pike to set it right.

a needle pointing true by @elenothar

Humans have always had soulmarks, causing a lot of (unnecessary) drama that all other species shake their heads at.

All of Michael's marks, without fail, had needed months of knowing the other person to establish.

Less than two weeks after Christopher Pike came on board the Discovery her average is thrown entirely out of whack.

Readability by @elenothar

The most worrying thing about accidentally having linked her mind to her Captain's during first contact with a telepathic species is how little it worries Michael.

Chris has a less easy go of it.

Gen:

Watch the Stars Fall by @wearethewitches

When the Discovery goes through the wormhole, instead of Terralysium, they find themselves in an alternate timeline - one where the U.S.S. Kelvin was destroyed in 2233.

-

or, I want to fix Star Trek 2009 and now I actually have a plausible way to do it. Michael-centric, new plot and I refuse to name Vulcans an endangered species.

Deep Space Wives:

From a Small Moon by celestialskiff

Set during season one. Kira has always known she wants to be with women, but she's never had the opportunity to explore her sexuality. When she realises Jadzia Dax reciprocates her feelings, she can't believe her luck. Unfortunately, memories of her life during the Occupation of Bajor keep getting in the way of her relationship. (Please note this story contains references to past rape and to abuse. It also contains really quite a lot of consensual lesbian sex.)

Jim Kirk/Christopher Pike:

What They Made Me by KrazzeeAJ1701

Her mother, Frank and Kodos had all tried to break her, it just made her stronger in the end.

McSpirk:

Farrae Gunna by @straight-outta-hobbiton

Best, brightest, and most expendable. Leonard should have that printed on a t-shirt. That’s what the crew of the Enterprise is comprised of, after all— people who are the right mix of smart and bad. Why? Well, Leonard hopes to find that out.

[goremances]

back in star trek discovery / lorca x michael hell send help...

...or fics

[almalvo]

STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | S1E10 "Despite Yourself"

[I will react to each episode individually and in full, raw reception and then post as is unrevised here onto my tumblr for the full span of every and all NuTrek episodes and series that have been and will be released. If this falls under your field of interest - I welcome your company in joining me. Enjoy the ride.] -------

wow first time the android dint have a bass sfx XD saru's tendrils - oml when he covers them is kinda cute i like owosekun's hairrr vulcans with weapons powered? bruh r we in mirrorverse we're in mirrorverse. 100%. yup. it was obvious from the end of last episode esp with 2 DISCOs showing mhmm. yeah these cuts need improvement still but alright bring it DISCOs turn for mirrorverse antics. lets go. haha this ep writen by someone named "sean cochran". zefram? jkjk tribble backk so cute give me one i wonder what its name is

ok this spinning scene of lorca and burnham and saru talking is spinning way to fast for too long how long are we going to keep spinning. its actually making me busy and hte cuts are not consistent in momentum so it didnt feel seamless it sholdve been takien in one shot and the camera needed to stop WAY sooner. thats how you wouldve actually shot a scene of that type. but "idk" ig, im just a mortal 😭 OK STAMETS. NOT ME SENDING PEOPLE 10 METRES AWAY FROM A TAP OF A FINGER sylvia saying "oh my god" then resuming like nothing happened was such a fast tone change i see those piercing marks on doc's ears. i always get this thoght of, whenever i see that on someone, im like BRUH PUT THEM BACK IN some of these camera ratios, rule of thirds, etc., are like. not done great? idk the eye is not reading the shot how it should a lot cuz the entity is not in an advantageous spot onscreen. tyler is going THROUGH it. damn. i think tyler's actor does well with representing traumatic fear oh interesting. i love these tactile sounds like the sound of the device tyler is wearing on his hand to control the ship's arm i like lorca's rbf XD

shit. poor tyler. thats never ok. her violating u like that. ugh. this makes me uncomfortable oh interesting. oo his klingon inflections are so good oh shit this is a weird scene its such a MIX of implications i like the acting i it actually it felt actually kind of complex, though the idea is simple nice this was actually decently shot. i like the way tyler's hair sits on his head haha looks nice nice swoops man these inconsistent camera transitions (one pose in the last cut, but a diff pose in the other) tylers acting doing p well actually his emotional expression is p decent yeah good ash x burnham is still an f no for me feels so empty it prob always will to me oo the gore effects of the cuts on hishand from the broken glass look relaly good faceless emperor. im so curious who.

"mirror disco". yess. ooo what do their mirrorverse selves look like SYLVIA. oml oh my god oml this is coo,ll oml SYLVIA LETS GO BEAT HER ASS. NOOOOO WHAT THE HECK HECK HELL HOLD YOUR HORSES?? WHAT THE CRINGEEEE oml please sylvia pull through lorca coaching her lmao WHAT THE FUCKGKKHKH O9H NMY GODDDDDD CHIEF ENGINNEERRRRR AND LORCA DOES A PASSASBLE SCOTTS ACCENRTTTTT????@?!??! YOURE FUKCING KIDDDIDNGGGG GET THE FUCK OUT OH MY GODDDDDDD/???? LORCA I MIGHT LIKE YOU MORE OML H GHGJAIHO THIS PREMONITION FUC KKKKKKKK lorca has a type of voice that sounds nicer when its quieter if that makes sense? it almost sounds strange when he yells? idk maybe its just me or maybe thats the way audio was edited oml the way saru was saying "well thats not very clever" was so emotive its beautiful oml their uniforms are oml so cool man the mirror badge man ill say not to be a shit but i love to always see this TOS/star trek root-type episodes where they reminisce on such a classic trope from og trek - but at the same time, i wihsh trek didn tdo it so much to just solely rely on TOS to make its relevance stronger, no matter how sensible that seems? while star wars feels preety big and expansive and busy with a lot of overlapping lore star trek is literally just "TOS, the expanded version" it feels so small. in that, nigh everyhing will forever and always just be/because of TOS. and i love tos. dont get me wrong, its my all time favourite forever. but trek i feel like never can develop significantly newer stuff? OH MY GOD USS DEFIANTTTT LOOK AT HERRR god i cant wait to see this ship design.. but yeah idk if people understand what i mean. that something so ideologically massive as trek is so small as a creative work in its "relevant lore". sure tng has its things, so does ds9, voy, ent - but it all comes back to tos. which is a double edge sword. a good thing. but also a bad thing. for if it were without tos, then much of trek doesnt really hit like that. yes be great hubby hugh love your mans ?? oh for a second i was like his eyes oh wow seeing sylvia with sstraight hair oh wow it compliments her head and face shape ngl she looks great in the armour. they all do ooh lorca in a leather jacket and black t shirt? okok works on him oooo sylvia lets GO GET IT YES KILL IT BRUH DO IT DO IT oo this dark lipstick works great on burnham oo i wonder when we will see sylvia really a captain

wtf. lorca for real? yo ujust did that to yourself? for blood? bruh we couldve done make up also yes of course, big runny red line down side of face. oooooooooooooooo MEAN BURNHAM lorca is an oddly good prisoner. hmMmmMM damn yall sass. ugh i really really really want more trek games. is he not human. is tyler not humnan. is tyler not originaly human. SO TYLERS A FUCKING KLINGON? i love his look of dejection hes relaly good at it. dude. hes a fucking klingon UH UHHHHH UHHHHHHHHHHHH??????????? DID YOU JUST FUCKING KILL HUGHHH??????? WHAT THE FUCK????? WAIT GAY COUPLE IS GONE DEAD NOW ITS OVER??/ WHAT I THOUGHT I THOUGHT STAMETS AND HUGH LAST LONGER? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? IM SO CONFUSED?? WHAT THE FUCK? WHY DID HUGH HAVE TO DIE ESP LIKE THAT? WHAT THE FUCK. what the actual fuck. its always the poc who dies. fuck you. idk. if he rly died or what. but fuck you. and trek still in the closet fuck this internalised homophobia. its been 6 FUCKING DECADES. GET OVER YOURSELF. KIRK AND SPOCK FUCKING EXIST. JUST COME OUTTA YOUR RAINBOW DOORS & BE DONE WITH IT. FUCK. (and no im not condoning invasion of privacy of one's sexual/gender orientation at all. i just mean if you said your gay. then own it. cuz trek has said it. its called seasons 1-3 of TOS, TAS, ST I-VI, AOS I-III. so own it. fuck.)

burnham does this role relaly well in a way she fits THIS mirror burnham more than her default. also damn lorca hahaha what i say, he gets kicked around a lot but its intersting that hes cap in this kind of role damn burnham you angery. i like this gold foil look on their armour. oo get him burnham get him get him decent choreo ooo ok ok yeah decent choreo oh yeah oooo nice i love this blade design oh shit burnham sonequa did well in her reaction to stabbing him. u can read the shock aand regret in her eyes forget klingons mirorverse starfleet is literally death. bat'leth? more like batshit. also this bridge oo whoa her bridge is on the bottom of her ship ooooo her warping oooo captain burnham but not how i thoughbt itd happen i feel like sonequa is better in this its crazy i feel like her as mirror self is better?

yes those HIGH boots sharp black and gold ugh. i love love LOVE the art department behind DISCO. hmm i feel like i see definite glimpses and glimmers of really quality stuff and quality delivery in this show but htey are very sporadic. spaced apart y inconsistencies and discrepancies. i think this sho wcouldve been much better ash and burnham - im sorry but who actaully, ACTUALY cares about them together. snoreeee s n o r e e e e e e um. lorca. is actually getting tortured. dude whta did i TELL yall. hes literally the one who gets pissed on fr fr 😭 damn. seeing lorca screaming. damn. id be surprised. but then again. he gets bashed all the time so. eh. ngl i feel like lorca gon die. but i wonder how.

damn.

[james-t-kirks-fat-ass-tiddies]

Hey guys check out my Star Trek Discovery fic. This one is for all the villain fuckers and old man enthusiasts. Michael Burnham x Gabriel Lorca

[giallos]

I ship Michael and Lorca so much thank you for feeding me

Yessss there's someone else in this dumpster!!! I rediscovered (harhar) them the other day and now I'm spiraling 😅

[halfblood-fiend]

I watched, like, 6 or 7 Discovery episodes with my boyfriend yesterday and.... there's just so. MANY good Lorca/Burnham moments. I can't. Contain.

[pixiedane]

[theladyfangs]

Reflections/ The Other Part 7

Ticking

He keeps status maps at the ready, real-time positions of both sides that the crew can monitor throughout the day. Lorca wants them to see it, wants them to know that what they’re doing matters. That the missions this ship is undertaking are making a difference. Slowly the front line begins expanding as the Federation takes back its territory, one colony, one starbase, one battle at a time. Discovery’s plan, Michael and Lorca’s plan, is working.

He makes sure to highlight the gains they make. Those Discovery is directly responsible for. It’s for crew morale. It’s for a group still trying to put the pieces of their broken and interrupted lives back together. It’s for them to know he’s a captain that has their back.  It’s not a perfect system, but it’s one that works for them as a unit.

Admiral Cornwell is keeping her end of the promise, feeding them information. It comes through encrypted channels. For now, Discovery remains a “rogue” vessel, with a “rogue” captain that is acting on its own—its Captain, first officer, and science specialist choosing the targets based upon strategic Federation needs. Someone has to do it since the admirals that remain, with the exception of Katrina, apparently don’t know how.

There’s been neither official condemnation nor acknowledgement of their actions. But Lorca doesn’t need it. Nor do his crew. They can all see it’s working.

The ship’s conference room has become the strategy room.

Around the table, are his chiefs: Specialist Michael Burnham. Commander Saru. Lieutenant Stamets.

Here, they study the map. Analyze and debate next steps. Weigh how the Klingons respond to Discovery’s moves.

After the morning meeting, they go about their business. But this time, Lorca asks Michael to stay back.

“Specialist,” he says. “A moment of your time.”

She nods and they wait until Saru and Stamets have departed.

“Are you upset with me?” Lorca asks.

“You’ve given me no reason to be displeased, sir.”

She’s equally as formal. He tries again.

“Have you been…resting?”

She knows what he means. It’s been nearly a month since she left his quarters abruptly. He’s not seen her in the observatory since. She has reported to her station dutifully each morning, but when not on duty, he can’t find her.

“I have been well.”

They’re getting nowhere, and so he decides to just stop. It’s not working. What he wants to say is that he misses her company. But at the rate he’s going with her, that’s likely to be misinterpreted.

“I’m glad for it. Dismissed, Specialist.”

She goes. His eyes follow as she does, tracing the slender curves of her figure.

.

.

That night he spots her. But she’s not in the observatory.

“I thought you were resting well,” Lorca asks catching up to Michael in the corridor. They walk side-by-side. In her hands is the tribble.

“Still no name, yet?” he observes. At the sound of his voice, the creature lets out a chirrup sound and begins to squirm excitedly in Michael’s arms. The sudden movements catch her by surprise as her pet wiggles itself out of her grip and she nearly drops him. She hands him over to Lorca.

“I think he likes you more than me,” she says drily as he takes it in hand.

“Jealous, specialist?” The tribble chirrups contentedly as Lorca holds it to his chest, the tiny, furry body inching its way up to nestle under his chin.

“So, a name?” He asks.

She shakes her head. As he strokes the creature, an idea comes to mind and Lorca smiles to himself and starts laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Michael looks at him, and he shoots her a devilish grin.

“I don’t think you’d get the reference.”

She raises an eyebrow and crosses her arms. “I was raised on Vulcan. There’s very little I don’t get.”

Like a sense of humor, he thinks.

“Never mind,” Lorca says out loud.  They’ve stopped and are standing in the middle of a corridor. He detaches the tribble from his neck and hands him back to her and walks off.

Michael follows.

“I HAVE a sense of humor,�� she defends, catching up to him.

“Oh really?”

“YES, really.”

“Fine.” He stops and turns to her.

“What’s black and white and red all over?”

“What?”

Michael blinks, confused. Lorca tries again.

“What’s black and white and red all over?”

“Are you speaking literally or figuratively?”

He rolls his eyes and smiles. “Thought so.” Lorca reaches down and gives the tribble an affectionate rub. “Night, Merkin,” he says, smirking to himself before heading off, leaving Michael alone.

Once back in her quarters, she goes to her PADD and looks up the word, “Merkin”.

A definition comes up on screen, along with a photo, and she covers her mouth in first shock at the sheer audacity of Lorca, and then, after a glance at her pet, she has to stifle her giggle in a pillow so as not to wake Tilly. After a while, when she manages to compose herself, she writes a message and hits send.

In his quarters, Lorca’s PADD vibrates, and he rolls over seeing a message pending.

He opens it.

“Very funny, sir. For the record, I believe my Merkin has a lot more fur.”

He bursts out laughing, wondering if Michael even realizes the double entendre at play. Probably not. But hell, who knows? At least she’s not mad at him anymore.

 Finding Oneself

He ducks right in time, barely avoiding the phaser fire. It glances off the side of the wall, a tendril of smoke curling up from the impact point.

“Lorca, let’s move!” the Andorian shouts, tucking and rolling out of the way as another volley of fire comes at them. They go. Shooting back. Aiming tight. Several Terran guards go down.

On the other side there’d been training simulations, and he’s been in a few skirmishes at some of the more remote colonies, but nothing like this. Bodies fall, dead. Not stunned.

There’s no coming back for them.

He’s not stopped long enough to tell whether he has any remorse. It’s about survival here. Kill, or be killed. And he’s damn sure not coming out on the latter side.

There’s really only one choice.

Good thing he’s always been a great shot.

These weapons are set to kill, not stun…

Lorca’s eyes snap open into darkness and he lies there, exhaling deeply. It’s been more than 400 days since he slept through the night. He huffs and gets up, giving up on more for the evening. The time reads 0300. Fuck. He just went down at 2400. But this is the norm. Over there, in the other universe, he never got more than snatches of sleep at a time. It takes six weeks to form a habit. He spent a year and a half, there.

Screw it, he thinks, pulling on a long-sleeved, fleet-issue shirt with pants and stepping into a pair of casual shoes. Let the night time wandering commence.

By now, the path is familiar. It just depends on the order of their arrival.

Sometimes, he’s there before she is. Sometimes, it’s the opposite. But there’s always the expectation they’ll find each other. Tonight does not disappoint. Michael is there when he walks through and she waits until he comes to stand beside her by the window.

“Good morning. Where’s my Merkin?” He teases.

It gets something he’s never seen from her. A tiny, curl of the lips.

Lorca plays shocked, eyes wide. “What? Is that a smile I see?”

Michael tries to school her face back into the mask, but it’s too late.

“Oh, no you don’t! I saw that.”

This time, she does smile. A real one for him, and to his real shock, she chuckles, too.  “I DO have a sense of humor, sir.”

He snickers and holds up his hands in a peace gesture. “You got me. So, what brings you wandering tonight?”

Slowly, the smile fades and she glances out the window.

“I’ve been thinking,” she tells him. “About that last battle.”

“What about it?” He asks.

“Did you feel anything? When we blew up their ship? It was crippled, sir.”

Did he feel anything?

It’s not Starfleet’s way to fire on disabled vessels. Federation rules state to offer assistance, even to one’s enemies. But this is war. And rules went out the window a year and a half ago….

“Do you want me to be honest,” Lorca says slowly, “or do you want me to lie?”

Michael studies him, her face tilted up into his.

“Honesty.”

“Then the answer is no.”

Her face is still, but her eyes get darker, deeper and he feels like he can see straight through to her soul. “Have you ever killed before?” She asks, waiting.

“Many times.”

“Me too.” She glances away.

“Do you feel guilty about that?” He tries to figure out where she’s going with this and is surprised when she shakes her head.

“No. And that is what bothers me.”

The levity from moments ago is gone now. His own lack of guilt bothers him too. But he stopped thinking about it a long time ago.

“I’m sure you did what you had to do,” he tells her. “Kill or be killed, Michael. It’s how we survive, now.”

“You sound like him, again.”

Lorca sighs. “I thought you didn’t want me to lie?”

“I don’t. I just…I’m beginning to wonder if the sacrifice of ideals is worth it.”

Ideals. He remembers a time when he held them just as close as she does now. But that was a very long time, and a multitude of experiences ago.

“I can’t answer that one for you,” Lorca says with a bitterness so acute, it strikes her.  “I stopped believing in Starfleet ideals a while back. Didn’t Starfleet ideals get us into this in the first place?”

She doesn’t answer, and he’s immediately aware he’s struck a sore spot.

“Michael, I…”

“It’s just the truth,” she says stopping him, mid-apology.

He elects not to continue. Instead, they stand there, together, watching the stars.

Unfinished Business

“You never answered my question.” The question that’s been lingering for weeks, now.

Another night. He doesn’t know why he’s so stuck on it, so insistent on wanting to hear her side. If she’ll tell him. They’ve retreated from the observation deck, to his quarters.

“What question?” She asks.

“Who was he, to you?”

It happens again. His answer is in how quickly she moves, getting up to leave. But this time he catches her hand and pulls her back down to the couch, holding on to her—not too tight, but it’s clear he wants answers, and it’s clear she doesn’t want to give them.

“Or, let me be blunt,” Lorca says, watching Michael, the way she looks away, pensively. The way her body tenses, her hands clasp together. “Were you two…intimate?” He refuses to let it go this time. It’s been hanging between them for weeks now. It’s been on his mind since Gabriel asked him to take care of Michael.

Her mind races, trying to find a way to deflect Lorca from this line of questioning. She knew better than to think he was done with it, but when he didn’t raise it again, she figured he’d moved on. Now it’s clear he’s not. And she’s not comfortable speaking of this. She’s told no one. Had vowed never to tell or speak of it, they hadn’t spoken of it, even between themselves, and for Lorca to want to know whether she was intimate with the other Gabriel…

The answer is yes.

Gabriel didn’t allude to it again—until he tried to get her to stay with him. Over there. And damn her human heart—that she so desired to say yes, and it was only stubborn pride that stopped her. She’d convinced herself she was far angrier at him in the moment than she really was. She’d convinced herself that his deceit warranted a punishment but if she’d known that it would mean losing him…

“There are many definitions of…intimacy.”

He doesn’t buy it.

Lorca knows all Michael’s tricks by now. She’s not going to wiggle out of it. She’s going to give him a straight answer.

“Fine. Did you have sex with him?”

The question is so direct it leaves no room for any sort of misinterpretation. She’s not accustomed to having something so deeply personal brought up. It throws her off. Makes her cringe. The memory that rises with the words is as sharp and clear as if it happened moments before. She can feel the warmth of Gabriel’s breath on her neck, his lips, slightly rough, kissing and grazing over her neck.

Her skin tightens with goosebumps. But her nipples do too, and she shifts, feeling the tingle between her legs. She clenches her knees together.

A purely physiological reaction, she tells herself. A fear response. Involuntary stimulation. Excitement. It will pass.

It’s written all over her face.

Lorca watches as she flushes, a red hue under her brown skin that makes her radiate. He can also tell, by the way her eyes cast downward, long lashes flutter.  

“It was only once.” She can’t look at Lorca. But he can’t look away from her, so obvious in her arousal and looking ashamed of it. Guilty. As if it’s wrong, what they did. He can’t say either way. Lorca knows Gabriel doesn’t believe what he did was wrong. But he can see that what Michael believes what she did, was.

“It’s okay,” he tells her, loosening his hold on her wrist, and laying a hand over hers. “You don’t have to say anymore.”

But she shakes her head, and while still not looking at him, tells him exactly what happened, and why.

“I was broken,” she says. “I was weak. I needed something to hold on to. And he offered me himself.”

It was only once, Michael said. But Lorca knows once was enough. “Did he force you?” he asks, his mind going back to what Katrina told him of her sordid experience with his evil twin, along with what he heard on the viewer, but didn’t see.

But she shakes her head. “No. I wanted him too.”

I wanted him too.

She feels guilty because she wanted.

…It’s the devil on his shoulder, the one he knows he should ignore, but it’s insistent and…

“Michael,” he takes her cheek in hand, guiding her face to his, their lips inches apart. Lorca knows he’s going to straight to hell. But the pull is undeniable, and he cannot break away from her face, his eyes drinking all of her in.

“Do you want me, too?”

One question. Two choices.

She nods.

Their first kiss is tentative. But it sends a rush through him, and he feels himself begin to come alive in a way that he hasn’t in….way too long.

Every single alarm is going off—telling both of them that they shouldn’t do it. Should stop this, quit while they’re falling behind. That it’s neither productive, nor healthy—a response to trauma manifesting in the wrongest of ways…but the kiss deepens on its own accord, and slowly shoes, pants, jackets, shirts, bra, underwear…it all forms a path to the bed, where bodies find a rhythm that starts slow, and gradually becomes more and more intense, until the sound of lovemaking begins to ring like a symphony all around.

He watches her in fascination, watches as even in sex, she tries to control her own pleasure, tamp it down. Deny it.

“Don’t do that.” He takes her hands and puts them over her head, feeling her shiver. She can’t hide like this. She’s beautiful and bare and what he wants is to run his tongue down her skin. So he does, kissing the side of her neck, her shoulder. Clavicle. Anywhere his mouth can touch. She responds by clenching around him, and he slows his pace, taking care to control himself.

“Look at me,” he commands, and eyes open for him. She trembles, gasps and he leans low, still holding her hands and whispers into her ear.

“I want you to come for me.”

He refuses to let her close her eyes. Stays focused on her face, watching her every reaction. Slowly, he breaks down her resolve, strips off her mask, and they go faster, and faster until everything fades away and it’s just the two of them and he has to anchor himself as she comes and calls out his name, the force of her orgasm so strong it triggers his.  He follows her with a shout, Michael’s hands gripping the back of his neck, pulling him down, and her body drinking him in, granting him safe harbor.

The last waking thought Lorca has is that he doesn’t know if it was him she was calling for…or the other him.

Exhaustion finally claims them. It’s the first time in a long time either sleeps fully through the night.

[emeraldal-blog]

[maegfen]

I have about 4 Garcy fic ideas that I really want to write right now but

1. I’m at work and writing instead of teaching Maths next lesson probably won’t go down well with the boss and

2. I should really be concentrating on finishing the start of my Lorca x Burnham camp nano story...

Why are there not more hours in the day?!

[mmark1985]

Thoughts on the "grooming" statement and other things said.

Is it weird that when I first watched that scene I took it to mean something totally different from what everyone else seems to think

1) I believed she was saying that Michael had Father issues like most women and men who don't grow up with their fathers.

2) I also believed Michael looked up to Lorca, admired him more than her own Mother.

3) I also took it to mean that when Michael got older she became attracted to Lorca

4) I assumed the term groom was in reference to Lorca turning Michael against her mother. Not to him slowly introducing Michael to a sexual relationship when she was underage... Which is what "grooming" is in the way people are taking it.

Now for what Lorca said.

1) someone better came long. To me this is saying that someone unexpected came along. Meaning he didn't expect to have the relationship with Michael that he ended up having. Therefore, the theory for him sexually grooming her doesn't ad up.

Final Thoughts

I believe that scene was a misdirection. I think it's to hide that Michael is actually leading Lorca in this Universe, she is his captain. Which is why he always does what she wants. He might fight it but he will do it eventually. I will say this. Either you have to admit Mirror Lorca deeply loves Michael so he feels like he must give her what she wants or he is used to taking instructions from her in his universe.

[porgthespacepenguin]

“this is not going to go the way you think”

(this was initially a comment on @trashywestallen’s blog that has now evolved into a full, 6500 word crazy meta. send help)

Or, the Lorca/Burnham meta that just wouldn’t quit and that nobody asked for.

Warning: those are just my ramblings/wild theories based on too much watching of the show, too little sleep, and some literary/cinematographic analysis.

Expect spoilers up to episode 10.

A lot of people on the Star Trek subreddits have been complaining that some of the plot twists so far on DSC have been too obvious (specifically, the Voq/Ash theory and the mirror!Lorca theory). Setting aside the fact that most of the general audience (who do not spend as much time as we do analyzing every word and frame) probably did not see those twists coming, at all…

I have a nagging feeling that there is another plot twist that has been under our nose this whole time.

I think Lorca is mirror!Lorca and was involved (romantically) with mirror!Michael. There, I said it. Worse: it was serious (perhaps she was even his wife, though obviously it would have had to be a  secret).

Either mirror!Michael was helping him secretly against the Terran Empire and was in on the coup, or more tragically, she wasn’t and was actually sent to stop him. She died, or was presumed dead: but the show was careful to mention it wasn’t Lorca who “killed” her, it was one of his followers (seems like an odd distinction to make, no?).

That’s a pretty radical theory, I admit. But bear with me for a while, will you?

Episode 10: the turning point

Three major plot point stand out immediately:

”Amazing isn’t it? Different universe, and somehow the same people had a way to find each other. Strongest argument I’ve ever seen for the existence of destiny.”

Their whole conversation in Lorca’s ready room is fascinating, but I’ll focus on the most relevant parts.

First off, while “finding each other” can apply to multiple people, it’s usually used for two. Lorca is almost certainly talking about the two of them here, not the crew in general.

And then, that bombshell... “destiny”. Defined as, “the hidden power believed to control future events; fate.”

That’s a pretty strong word to use. Essentially, Lorca is suggesting that fate has brought the two of them together, in this universe… and maybe even in another (mirror) universe.

Ever logical, Michael immediately rejects the very idea.

“I’m not sure I believe in the existence of destiny.”

This sort of talk is way too much for Michael to handle right now. She was raised on Vulcan: logic informs her thinking. But what Lorca is trying to tell her has nothing to do with logic. She just doesn’t hear him at all.

The rest of their conversation continues in a similar vein:

“Part of you had to know that wasn’t the end of your story (...) You were destined for something more.”

“Destiny did not get me out of prison, Captain. You did that.”

Two ways of looking at the same thing: one poetic and even romantic; the other factual and rational.  And perhaps they are both right, from their perspective: after all, if Lorca really is mirror!Lorca, who has lost his own Michael, only to find her again in another universe… that would be pretty incredible.

As he often does, Lorca immediately deflects:

“Let’s agree to disagree. For now.”

That “For now” is also important. Is there something that could realistically change her mind in the future, that he knows about and we don’t? Only Lorca knows.

Visually the scene is also very telling. They start off separated by his desk (which Lorca uses to create a barrier between them in many scenes, notably their first meeting) but then at his invitation, they move to the window, where the camera frames them with alternating two-shots (used primarily to establish links between characters) and close-ups (to create intimacy and focus on emotional reactions). There are also a few shots of them from behind, with their reflections in the window as well.

Mirror? Reflection? Did you want fries with your symbolism? (Note that shots of Lorca looking out a window with his reflection appearing also happens at least in episode 3, when Michael and Lorca first meet, and episode 6, after the whole Katrina debacle. They’ve not been subtle with this use of imagery).

- Not a scene but more a general feeling throughout the episode. How many times have we seen Michael touch Lorca previously? I’ll help you: exactly once, and honestly it barely counts (at the end of episode 3, when Michael takes a fortune cookie from his hand). As for Lorca, he never touches her.

Yet in this episode? Michael is all over him, starting from that moment on the bridge where she lays a hand on the small of his back to interrupt him (before that whole Scottish accent thing). That has literally never happened before.

Don’t even get me started on the whole hair and neck stroking she has going on later. In fact, as soon as she steps into her Terran persona she becomes a lot more tactile – only with Lorca, mind.

Now, I don’t know whether this means Michael is attracted to him or not – at least not consciously! – and in fact this might not even be the point.

Rather, those touches serve to establish and anchor a sense of physicality between the two of them, for us the audience. Essentially telling our unconscious minds:

“Look, here are are two very attractive people (that leather jacket, oh my lord) that are touching each other. The line has been crossed. Make of that what you will.”

I predict we will see an influx of new people wondering about the Lorca/Michael dynamic after watching episode 10, wondering if there was indeed something there or if they are imagining things.

- The ending scene! Either this is a very clever juxtaposition, or some super strange editing. Since TPTB have been doing excellent work on filmography so far, I’m hoping it’s the former.

I’m talking about the “love” scene between Tyler and Michael (and I use parenthesis here not because I dislike Ash/Michael -- I don’t -- but because at this point neither he nor Michael know who he is, or what he is, and … he just killed Culber in cold blood so… yay romance?) followed immediately by Lorca in the agonizer booth, screaming in pain.

Now that’s an odd editing choice. Or is it?

Cinematically, a cut like that is a common technique: it’s called cross-cutting, and is often used to show than two actions are happening at the same time.

According to Wikipedia:

“This creates a sharp dichotomy between the two actions, and encourages the viewer to compare the two shots. Often, this contrast is used for strong emotional effect (...).”

If we go back to the theory that mirror!Lorca and mirror!Michael were together, as more than just reluctant allies, and that he has feelings for both versions of her (yes, prime!Michael too after learning to know her)…

Well, Michael and Tyler consummating their relationship brings utter and complete agony to Lorca.

This is all symbolic, of course, but re watching the scene with all this in mind… It’s chilling. Tyler above Michael, the scene telegraphing that they are about to have sex…

Cut to Lorca screaming in the agonizer booth.

At the very least, they are implying some fairly dark things about Michael/Tyler going forward, but I also think it’s significant that Lorca is the one shown in pain here.

An aside: Michael/Tyler, from Ash to ashes

Poor Michael. Poor Tyler. I’ve been sure of the whole “Ash is Voq” thing almost since his introduction (remember the eye wound Michael inflicts on Voq in episode 2? Now check Tyler’s same eye in episode 5. Go on. I’ll wait.) but I thought there might be hope for them somehow, despite the fact that both had killed each other’s mentors (eaten, actually, in Voq’s case…)

Until episode 10.

I won’t dwell too much on the fact that, out of all the possible scenarios for Ash/Voq, we ended up with the worst one for their future: Tyler is Voq, physically and mentally -- not the other way around. The Tyler personality is an overlay, and we don’t know yet how much of that personality is real. But regardless: the body belongs to Voq.

I would have had a lot more hope if Tyler had been physically Tyler, with Voq’s personality implanted somewhere inside. This duality could have allowed a positive resolution for the plot line (driving out Voq’s consciousness, for example) and therefore their relationship.

Moving on.

Tyler/Voq murders Culber in cold blood (or so it seems to the audience), then proceeds to break into Michael’s room (and yes, this is meant to feel slightly creepy, even out of character for Tyler, who has so far respected her boundaries) and seduces her.

Everything is consensual but feels a bit… off. And for good reason.

They are surrounded by enemies, Michael is emotionally shaken from having had to kill a familiar face/friend (and the ironic juxtaposition of their two kills, one a cold-blooded murder, the other an act of self-defense, is just heartbreaking), and Lorca is being horribly tortured a few decks below.

Yikes.

Sex, and death, and pain. Those are not good things to put together when hoping for a happy ending. Symbolically there is no going back from this, I don’t think.

If they had consummated their relationship previously, in a more positive setting, I could still see their romance perhaps going in a positive direction (at least this would have been a good sign, though Culber’s fate might have made that moot as well).

As things stand, it feels like watching the death warrant of their relationship being signed and… ouch.

Poor Michael. Talk about a devastating first love.

Did someone say first love?

Interestingly there is a common trope pair, “First Love” / “Second Love”, that is often combined with “Wrong Guy First”. From TVTropes:

“This is the plot that results when a Love Triangle is used to illustrate the Aesop "Be Careful Who You Give Your Heart To".

Our heroine is a young woman with two suitors. Suitor #1 (...) seems to be everything a young woman would want. But he's not. Suitor #2 appears to be flawed. (...) If he's handsome, he's not as handsome. He could be many years older than our heroine. He often has the kind of personality that makes him hard to get to know.”

There are many literary examples of this trope, from Jane Austen, Tolstoy, or Dickens, all the way to Harry Potter or even the Hunger Games.

But no, wait. That can’t be right. It’s not like there is someone else who has been watching over Michael from the side lines since the beginning.

Right?

Well...

“I did choose you” : Going back to the beginning

After having this “red alert something is happening here” moment while watching episode 10, I went back and re-watched most of Lorca and Michael’s earlier interactions with this theory in mind.

(As a general note, I think Lorca generally avoids lying outright and prefers a more… Obi-wan approach. “What I told you was true, from a certain point of view.”)

Episode 3: First meeting and new beginnings

Their first meeting is almost theatrical in its setting. Michael enters a darkened room, and Lorca has his back to her, facing the window (where, again, his reflection can be seen). He is clad (armored, really) in darkness and mystery.

Lorca initially sounds almost like he is flirting: 

“I like to think it makes me mysterious. No?” 

“Don’t be shy.”

When I watched the episode for the first time, I thought it might be part of his personality (like Kirk) but no. He does not do this with other people. Only Michael.

In fact, I now think he is deflecting. The whole situation is somehow painful or difficult for him, and he uses humor to hide it. Which of course falls utterly flat, because Michael does not really get humor (at least not at this point).

He keeps his back to her for a long time, and even takes a breath before turning around, as though he has to fortify himself before seeing her.

Now that doesn’t make a lot of sense at face value, if Lorca is just a captain and Michael just a mutineer.

But it is a lot more understandable if Lorca is mirror!Lorca and the last time he saw Michael was before she (well, her mirror counterpart) died.

Because of him.

Lorca then comes to stand behind his desk, in a move he will be shown to use often in the future. Make no mistake, this is a highly defensive maneuver.

They talk about Michael’s shuttle being diverted, and no surprise, Michael’s logic bluntly dispels Lorca’s attempts at plausible deniability. (Something, by the way, that happens many times in the series: she rarely lets him get away with misdirection. Though amusingly she has also, so far, never caught up with what he is actually trying to hide.)

To which Lorca says:

“Maybe the universe hates waste.”

Considering their discussion in episode 10, similarly in Lorca’s ready room, this line takes on a lot more meaning. He is referring to destiny here, although obliquely.

Visually, two things happen in succession: Lorca has a little half smile, and then tilts his head and holds her gaze for a long moment. Now what does body language have to say about that?

“In courtship, the head tilt shows a playful and engaged attitude. It shows interest but can also be a tease (especially when combined with a half smile and sideways glance).”

Lorca is definitely flirting with her this time. In fact, his next move supports this idea. He moves around the desk and comes to stand in front of her. He does not completely leave the security of the desk, mind, instead choosing to lean against it (a sign of insecurity) while his shoulders are set back in a classic power pose.

Michael is startled and takes a few steps back, swallowing. I don’t think she is scared of him, not on a conscious level. But on an unconscious level, we have a (presumably) virginal or inexperienced young woman suddenly approached by an older, attractive man who has been flirting with her (though I doubt she consciously noticed). She is shaken.

He either doesn’t notice, or (more likely) pretends not to notice and basically offers her a job. She refuses (not just the job, but the whole Call to Adventure -- more on that later).

He tells her she doesn’t have a choice.

This is a crucial moment. Lorca talks to her harshly, tells her there are no free rides on his ship (ironic, since he is the one that dragged her here!) and that she will be put to work. Almost at once, he moves back behind the safety of his desk, walls firmly back up. He will be the “bad guy” because she needs him to be, but he is not enjoying it.

Make no mistake, Michael needs it. At this point in her story, she has lost hope. She is a ghost of her former self. She was right about the Klingons, but with the guilt of Georgiou’s death, she had taken on the guilt for the whole war as well. She is depressed, withdrawn. She has given up.

What Lorca does is put her back on her feet. He gives her a job, a purpose (however temporary), and even a mystery to chew on (of course he knew she was going to try to break in, and he wanted her to -- that’s why he assigned her to Engineering).

He reminds her of who she was (“You were once a Starfleet officer.”).

Of course, at that moment, she doesn’t see his actions as a gift, but rather a burden, an obligation. If she had the energy for it, she would resent him.

It will take her three episodes to process and express her gratitude for the second chance he has given her (more on that later).

Lorca does all this obliquely, as he does many (most) things. In fact, I believe he does not want Michael to be grateful to him (perhaps out of guilt). Mind you, he is also testing her: Lorca is a pragmatist. And if he is mirror!Lorca, he doesn’t know this version of Michael yet, and what she is capable of.

When Michael leaves with Landry, there is another closeup on Lorca’s face, and he has this very odd expression. Like this has affected him, was hard on him, somehow.

This makes no sense at all if Lorca is prime!Lorca and is simply meeting a mutineer he wants to recruit. But even if our Lorca is indeed mirror!Lorca, why would meeting Michael’s prime counterpart affect him so? Unless there is more to it than meets the eye.

At the end of the episode, we go back to Lorca’s ready room, in a lovely symbolic mirroring/book-ending of their first meeting.

Lorca is looking every inch the Captain, standing firmly behind his desk, arms wide, shoulders straight. Again a classic power pose. He offers her a position aboard Discovery. She initially refuses him again but this time, she doesn’t back down.

I can’t emphasize how different Michael’s behavior is in both encounters.

When they first meet, she is defeated, submissive, withdrawn. When she refuses Lorca’s first offer, it is weakly, and he steamrolls her objections without difficulty. When he steps closer to her, she steps back. She looks down at the floor.

In this scene, however, Michael has regained her confidence. She looks Lorca straight in the eye when she refuses him, and he is on the defensive (or seems to be). She flings his question (“Why would you refuse?”) back at him (“Why do you want me to stay?”) and even stalks toward him.

Of course, Lorca being Lorca, Michael doesn’t quite get to keep the upper hand for too long. She gets derailed into a rant about Lorca developing and testing biological weapons, which then veers into a slightly pompous speech about being a Starfleet officer to the death.

Meanwhile, Lorca is smiling, a fond smile (that almost seems out of place considering he is supposed to have met her a couple of days before). This is what he has been planning all along. His experiment was successful.

His next sentence is very telling:

“I know exactly who you are, Michael Burnham. I know exactly who you are.”

Well, well.

Essentially, he is implying here that either he knows her because… he actually knows her (and that should not be possible); or he knows her because they are the same. They are kindred spirits.

Either way, it’s a fairly odd thing to say to someone you’ve known for a few days!

Still smiling fondly, he stops her from making more of a fool of herself and proceeds to dazzle her with his shiny new technology. He is really pulling all the stops here to impress her, even taking her on a virtual tour of the galaxy.

And then he outright admits it:

“I did choose you (…) but not for the reasons you think.”

This sentence works on so many levels, it’s pretty incredible. Note that she asked him why he wanted her to stay; and he answers that he chose her. Those are not even remotely comparable in terms of emotional involvement.

Then the camera switches to choker shots (tight close-up shots that cut off above the eyes and under the mouth/chin) which are traditionally used to create … romantic tension. Or at the very least emotional tension.

Lorca holds out his hand, with a fortune cookie in it (fortune cookie which she refused in their initial meeting, mirroring!).

(No time to discuss in too many details, but in fortune cookie, there is “fortune”... another reference to fate/destiny.)

She takes the fortune cookie from his hand. This time, she accepts his offer, and symbolically, the Call to Adventure.

An aside: Michael’s hero journey

I have mentioned the Call to Adventure a couple of times now, and I realize it might be helpful to take a brief detour into the Hero’s Journey before we continue.

The Hero’s Journey, or monomyth, is a template of narrative analysis that is widely used in storytelling. It is not absolute, or perfect (it has received its fair share of criticism) but so many stories follow these patterns that they have become embedded in our collective unconscious. As such, they can be helpful in understanding the symbolic underpinnings of a story.

The Hero’s Journey (according to Campbell, who first wrote about it in 1949) is broadly composed of 3 acts (Departure, Initiation, Return), further divided in 17 stages.

For the purpose of this meta (and considering DSC is only in its first season!), I will focus mostly on the first stage, Departure.

(Note that not all stages need to be used in a story, nor do they need to happen in a linear fashion. They may also happen multiple times, in multiple forms.)

The call to adventure

The refusal of the call

Supernatural aid/meeting the mentor

Crossing the first threshold

The belly of the whale

Acceptance of the call

When we meet Michael again in episode 3 (which narratively is the beginning of the story, with episodes 1 and 2 serving as a prologue), she is a broken woman. So heavily laden with guilt, in fact, that she has essentially given up and turned her back on everything she is and believes in.

When Lorca offers her a (temporary) job on Discovery, she turns him down. On paper, this looks like a textbook refusal of the call, and it is. But looking deeper, even before she comes aboard Discovery, Michael has already refused it, and in fact, has been refusing it for a while.

"Refusal of the summons converts the adventure into its negative. Walled in boredom, hard work, or 'culture,' the subject loses the power of significant affirmative action and becomes a victim to be saved. [Her] flowering world becomes a wasteland of dry stones and [her] life feels meaningless. (...) All [she] can do is (...) await the gradual approach of [her] disintegration." (Campbell)

From the moment Captain Georgiou dies, Michael shuts down. She refuses all attempts to move forward, essentially locking herself away and throwing away the key. She has given up on herself. This is Michael’s true refusal of the call.

“The mentor gives the hero the supplies, knowledge, and confidence required to overcome his or her fear and face the adventure.” (Christopher Vogler)

Lorca then plucks her from her prison, as if by magic, and sets her to work on his ship. This is the supernatural aid/meeting the mentor stage.

"With the personifications of [her] destiny to guide and aid [her], the hero goes forward in [her] adventure until [she] comes to the 'threshold guardian' at the entrance to the zone of magnified power.” (Campbell)

Lorca then sends Michael to the Glenn, along with Stamets, Tilly and Landry. This plot point represents both the Crossing of the First Threshold and the Belly of the Whale stages, combined.

At Lorca’s orders, and despite herself, Michael has to leave the safety of Discovery for the danger of the Glenn. This is her first mission since her mutiny, and since she turned down the call. She is forced to cross the threshold of the boundaries, the walls she has drawn around herself.

“It is a turning point in the Hero’s Journey where the hero is swallowed by a larger monster or representative of evil and comes out with a new sense of self. The hero is consumed but emerges alive. (...) and [comes] to terms with death.” (Gordon Napier)

“That is why the approaches and entrances to temples are flanked and defended by colossal gargoyles: dragons, lions, devil-slayers with drawn swords, resentful dwarfs, winged bulls. The devotee at the moment of entry into a temple undergoes a metamorphosis.” (Campbell)

On the Glenn, everything is dark and scary. There are dead bodies, horribly disfigured. There is a monster roaming. Michael barely escapes with her life, after crawling through tunnels with the tardigrade in pursuit, before jumping into the shuttle at the last possible moment (quite heroically I might add). This stage is the metaphorical Belly of the Whale.

Incidentally, an important theme throughout the episode, and especially the tardigrade pursuit, is “Alice in Wonderland”: a vivid tale where physical metamorphosis, the search for identity and the hero’s journey all play a prominent role.

After Michael faces her trials successfully, she starts to remembers who she is: a Starfleet officer. She has begun to process her grief and can now start her hero’s journey anew (a journey of healing and growth).

Later, when Lorca offers her a permanent position on Discovery, Michael accepts both his second offer and the symbolic call to adventure (after a fair bit of convincing).

And she does it on her own terms, too: if Lorca had been working on a biological weapon, she would have refused him, but not for the same reasons she had turned him down initially. Not out of fear and self-doubt, but with a renewed respect for herself and her beliefs.

She has started to remember that she is a hero.

There are many other aspects of the Hero’s journey when it comes to Michael in Star Trek Discovery, but this goes beyond the scope of this already huge meta.

Episode 5: Keeping secrets

Episode 5 doesn’t technically have any direct interactions between Michael and Lorca. There is, however, a fairly significant scene between him and Katrina Cornwell, on the matter of our favorite mutineer.

Halfway through their fight, the admiral asks Lorca an enormously important question:

“(...) Why give everyone another reason to judge you?”

Of course, Lorca immediately deflects with another question of his own, putting Katrina on the defensive. And he never actually answers the question, which means that whatever it is, it’s important.

Episode 6: Shadows and mirrors

After Michael senses Sarek’s pain and collapses, Lorca is right there at her bedside when she awakens. Does he usually do this for his crew? Somehow I doubt it.

Then Michael asks him to mount a rescue for Sarek and… Lorca does it. No questions asked.

He defies a direct order from Starfleet, which later on brings down Cornwell’s inquisition on him (by the way, she’s a psychiatrist who thinks nothing of sleeping with someone she considers psychologically unstable? Hmm.). He ends up in real danger of losing his ship. All this because Michael said please.

Then there is of course the infamous conversation between Lorca and Tyler in the shuttle:

“Bring her back in one piece.”

“Not a scratch.”

“I’m talking about her. Or don’t come back at all.”

First off, wow. Lorca is definitely overreacting here. This is not normal Captain behavior. In fact, Tyler’s reaction (thinking Lorca meant the shuttle) is much more logical than what Lorca actually means (“Anything happens to Michael, you’re a dead man”).

Whether he means it 100% is up for debate, but the message is crystal clear: this is a threat.

Bring her back to me or else.

Note that at no point in this conversation does Lorca feel the need to refer to Michael by name, simply using “her” as though it was obvious who and what he means. And to him, it is. But to poor Tyler, or even to the audience, this serves to point out the stark disconnect between normal concern over a mission vs. abnormal worry over a particular individual.

Before leaving, Lorca claps Tyler on the arm and this feels like a dominant gesture, a way to establish a hierarchy that has nothing to do with Starfleet’s. Especially after their friendly chat/threat.

Upon first watching the episode, this scene seriously made me raise an eyebrow because he sounds way too protective/possessive for a captain just caring about a crew member (and not Tilly or Tyler, who are also going on the mission, remember?).

At the end of the episode, Michael thanks Lorca, pointing out that he didn’t have to save Sarek. Lorca answers, truthfully:

“I didn’t do for him.”

He then adds that he needs his team at peak form but those are just empty words. At no point in the series does he ever choose an individual crew member’s needs over the ship/the mission. In fact, being the pragmatist that he is, he does not hesitate to put them in danger if the mission requires it (see Stamets -- though I honestly don’t believe Lorca knew or could have foreseen what would happen to him when they made that last jump).

Except when it comes to Michael.

Finally, we are offered a  shining example of the rule of threes (commonly found in fairy tales, but not only). From TVTropes:

“The Rule of Three is a pattern used in stories and jokes, where part of the story is told three times, with minor variations. The first two instances build tension, and the third releases it by incorporating a twist.”

Lorca makes her a third and final job offer: a place not only on Discovery, but on the bridge, as science officer. By his side.

In a reversal of the previous offers, Michael accepts at once, without an ounce of hesitation. She does not need any convincing.

She also says something quite meaningful, in light of her initial reactions to his first two offers:

“I am grateful… to serve under a captain like you.”

Characteristically, Lorca seems to refuse her gratitude. He looks startled, says nothing, just offers a small smile then walks away.

At this point in their story, we don’t know if this is out of guilt (atonement), his personality or even a narrative continuation of the “Wrong Guy First” trope, where the sidelined suitor is still trying to ensure the heroine’s happiness. Perhaps a mix of all three.

Episode 9: On the bridge we fight

Pahvo is in danger. Discovery, by association, is in danger. The Federation is in even more danger than usual because of the Klingon’s stealth technology.

Lorca decides to send a team to place beacons on the Klingon ship. He picks Tyler, and Tyler picks Michael, as she is the most qualified for the job.

And Lorca just goes, “No way, Michael’s not going, it’s too dangerous”. Too dangerous for her, but not for the other crew members sent on the boarding party, mind you. Including Tyler who is standing right here.

As is quickly becoming her habit, Michael just insists and proceeds to bludgeon Lorca with her logic while the rest of the crew (and the audience) tries to understand what is going on.

Lorca looks supremely uncomfortable. His whole posture is one of avoidance. He sits down onto his chair and seems to just shrink on himself, turning away from Michael in clear dismissal. He avoids her gaze, snaps at her and even resorts to orders (something he hasn’t done since their first meeting).

“Sir, you offered me a place on this ship.”

“And now I’m ordering you to stay!”

Meanwhile, everyone else on the bridge is just watching them in disbelief, and with no small amount of discomfort. They do not understand what they are witnessing -- a battle of wills.

Until finally Michael, reaching the logical conclusion of Lorca’s odd behavior, stumbles onto the truth:

“There is no logic to your thinking. Unless this is about me.”

At that Lorca finally has to look at her, but he doesn’t say anything because there is nothing to say. She is right on both counts: he is not being logical at all, and this is about her.

Amusingly, Michael still manages to miss the point completely, misreading Lorca’s agitation and protectiveness by viewing herself as a resource (to be hoarded) rather than a person (to be protected).

I honestly felt bad for Lorca in this scene. If Michael were even a tiny better at understanding feelings, in herself or in others, she would probably realize that his behavior is not normal. But she is oblivious, for which Lorca is probably very thankful.

After that, well, she has basically put him on the spot, and in front of the whole bridge to boot. He glances at Saru, then back at Michael. He has lost and can only concede. He has no more arguments beyond, “I am afraid to lose you” and that is not something he can say.

(Mind you, if this scene had been between the two of them in private, without the whole bridge watching, he would never have allowed her to go. Logic be damned.)

So Lorca finally relents, but you can tell it’s against his will. Like pulling teeth.

He even orders her to come back safely (but not Tyler, who is also going on that super duper dangerous mission and is standing right here!) Then we have another shot of his face, looking pretty damn unhappy. Wretched, even.

Possessing the emotional intelligence of a brick (and I say that as someone who loves the character), Michael thanks him and looks satisfied. For her the matter is resolved.

She totally doesn’t realize that:

She, a convicted mutineer, has just pitted her will against her captain’s and won.

She should be in the brig or confined to quarters right now, not going on the mission.

Lorca only gave in because whatever secret he is trying to protect is more important to him than his pride.

One wonders what Saru and the bridge crew made of that little scene.

Lastly, note the contrast between their confrontation in this episode, and episode 6 where Michael risks her life to go save Sarek.  

Of course, going on a rescue mission inside a nebula is probably less dangerous than infiltrating the Klingon Ship of the Dead, but it still carries a vast amount of risk (as evidenced by Stamets’ flippant “Are you really that crazy?”).

If Lorca only saw Michael as a tool he cannot afford to lose, for whatever purpose, he would never have allowed her to risk her own life going after Sarek.

He even had a perfect excuse: Starfleet explicitly forbade it. There was no reason for him to take such a tactical risk (which nearly cost him the Discovery and later brought down the wrath of Starfleet over his head), unless he knew this was important to Michael. And therefore, important to him as well.

So. What is Lorca’s deal?

Only Lorca knows, really. But we can try to explain his behavior in three basic ways:

Our Lorca is prime!Lorca and just cares about Michael because he likes her. That option definitely doesn’t explain everything, and seems to be disproved by episodes 9/10 (he did override the ship to jump somewhere, and he definitely didn’t want Saru to look into the logs. Mirror!Lorca seems also conveniently absent from the MU).

At this point, it seems relatively safe to assume our Lorca is mirror!Lorca. Which leaves two options:

Lorca wants to use prime!Michael for something, perhaps related to overthrowing the Emperor. He sees her as a tool, perhaps a valuable crew member. Now that theory explains many things, but not all, especially how Lorca just seems to care so damn much (and in that scenario, allowing Michael to risk her life to save Sarek just makes no sense, as stated above).

We go back to our starting theory. Lorca cared about mirror!Michael, in whatever capacity. She died (because of him, even if indirectly) and he feels grief/remorse because of it. He might also have started to care for prime!Michael in her own right. And he doesn’t want to lose her again. He just can’t bear it.

(Note that in this last theory, Lorca might ALSO need Michael for something related to overthrowing the Emperor. Lorca is a pragmatist, and if they were both working together originally, he might be hoping she will help him again.)

What does this mean for the future?

Short answer: it’s too early to tell.

Long answer?

Right now, if I am right and there is something between Lorca and Michael, I am inclined to think it’s one-sided. She respects him and might be attracted to him, unconsciously, but her attention is on Tyler. Lorca is not even trying to position himself as a contender, either.

Unfortunately, Tyler/Michael is likely going to go down in flames, and it’s going to hurt. All aboard the pain train, direction tragedy.

Michael is going to regress emotionally for a while. Losing a first love is hard, losing it to betrayal is awful. She is going to have to grow as a person to get past this.

I think at some point in their stay in the MU, someone (an enemy perhaps) will reveal that mirror!Michael was Lorca’s wife, or at least someone important to him. And that bombshell is going to alter Michael’s perception of Lorca (honestly she would need a bomb dropped on her head for her to catch a hint at this point).

Michael is most definitely not going to know what to do with that information. Expect a heroic BSOD, followed by her trying to understand things logically (and Lorca is not gonna be down with that, at all).

Lorca will not take it well either. He is an intensely private man, and I don’t think he had ever intended to tell Michael anything. He is likely going to close himself off as well (Tyler’s betrayal probably won’t help).

I don’t think Lorca will die in S1. Narratively, he is one of main characters (with Michael and Voq), and incidentally a fan favourite. We’ve already lost Culber (hopefully temporarily), and Ash is likely going to turn back into Voq. Stamets is still out of commission. Frankly, if Lorca dies there are not that many characters left!

Not to mention that neither Saru nor Michael are anywhere near ready to be captain yet.

Whoever she is in the mirror universe, Admiral Cornwell is not a friend to Lorca (unlike in the prime universe where they were likely friends with benefits).

We will stay a few more episodes in the Mirror Universe, though probably not until the end of the season.

[almalvo]

STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | S1E9 "Into the Forest I Go"

[I will react to each episode individually and in full, raw reception and then post as is unrevised here onto my tumblr for the full span of every and all NuTrek episodes and series that have been and will be released. If this falls under your field of interest - I welcome your company in joining me. Enjoy the ride.] -------

Seeing DISCO fly like that orbiting the ship is so pretty. Lorca does captaincy pretty well so far Or at least definitely holds that air Ok so these camera cuts dont feature zooms every shot - feels infinitely better. But I dont imagine that will last. It's so odd - I want to like Lorca more but he has such a sinister air about him - which is intentional im sure. curious what his lore is. I wonder where his tribble tribbles off to Nice to see lorca caring about the purpose of his ship - science haha this is the first time ive felt evil untrustworthiness in a main starship captain damn saru just like TALK to burnham? i saw your look at her when Lorca said she's to stay. These effects are so nicee Oml how Doc Hugh just swiped the PADD's contents into the holographic screen like that, sexy its so odd to see the camera out of focus in shots that should be in focus i really love how these screens look

Kol talking is so nice to hear his voice and how klingon roles off his speech sounds relaly good Ok in these klingon scenes, they really should stop the zooms. it makes it all feel like cutscenes in a videogame. such pretty beaminggg Im curius to see how they can retain this tension Ugh seeing DISCO move like that is so pretyyyy Dude time and time again, Trek could be such a good game series. theres so much to do if they can write a rich enough basis and objective course. I know Star Trek: Resurgence is a thing, but why is it the ONLY thing like it that exists for Trek? These things really make me wonder. And make me worry I really hope Trek doesnt fade out. I recognise another aspect of why I feel confused about Burnham's character is that it hasnt been made apparent to me really her amiable or decent rooting into the crew to care about them due to all of the animosity the show was borne with. L'Rell's eyes look so gooddd Damn she was into torturing u huh Damn you just shot her like that damn poor Tyler. I love how solid the phasers look in hand I love the detail in the sets marvelous job. Ohh thats a very nice fade in to the monitor of the sensour

oml the way DISCO could just spin like that and pull DBZ teleport lmaoooooo Kol saying "wtf is it doing" lmaooo I worry that the sensour on the klingon ship is so bright and glowy would just give away its position to the klingons It's a little odd how the DISCO spins before teleportation haha intersting though Stamets said I love you but had like no gravity ack The way Stamets shakes his head side to side like that nakedly without camera effect or blured movement looked laughable. this kind of stuff just really impedes the show. when its easy to fix. The way Kol picks his teeth with the badge - the way its shot is not the best but ill say Burnham's line delivery saying "I'm the one who killed T'Kuvma" was actually really good and strong. man this show has bits and pieces of being rather fair in performance. but it gets assaulted by really amateur/dumb/distasteful constructive choice in the episodes

damn i didnt think hed put the badge on himself That looks so interesting imagine that OOOO I liked that transport midjump nice ??? really?? Kol is destroyed just like that?? that felt so fast with very little impact? Kol never really felt menacing is the thing. The scariest the klingons felt in this show so far is literally episode one. when Burnham meets this fully armoured klingon during her space flight. It was a literlaly BEAUTIFULLY DELICIOUS moment of that reveal and that bird of prey it was actually WONDERFULLY done. where has that gone. i still dont care at all for ash x burnham. itd be more compelling if they were good friends. without romance.

i feel like nothing really significant happened with Kol gone now like nothing at all. There is a certain curse that Star Trek has. That is loses a lot of steam when it attempts to deviate from TOS. I mean, i understand TOS is the essence of trek forever and always. but it also makes me sad that trek doesnt really stand on its own with much semblance of strength without TOS. It's another reason why Trek feels so small. Cargo Bay is so pretty. Lorca being humble is nice. saying thank you? nice. The filming of this episode is literlaly better. the camera direction is not done in such an annooyingly impatient jittery way as past episodes I like how we just appreciate the cargo bay environment KLINGON BOOBS. i didnt think id see that. oml dont tell me you have a stockholm syndrome thang going on :( wow thats the first time i ever seen a naked klingon. Oh shit. dont say she R'd u. that's fucked. Ok I think another reason why this episode is actually better is because its actually DARING to be more S T E A D Y . which is something htis show CRITICALLY needs desparately. stamets kissy Hugh cuteee Stamets you better not die from this last jump.

Um. Lorca. Those are a lot of coordinates? um. ummmmm. oh shit whoaaaaaaa those are some NICE ice crystal effects on the glass

ummm there were momentarily 2 DISCOs ……. m…. …..m………mmm…….mirrorverse….??? infinite permutations huh MIRRORVERSE?

damn stamets so pale even his eyes lost colour. Kind of funny every time we see the android we hear that electronic sound Oooo

Ok yeah this was one of the stronger episodes in the series so far. almossst exclusively because the camera work/cinematic editing was more PATIENT. whatd i say. ok well an improvement for sure, this episode was.

im waiting on ya, DISCO.