#major sandman spoilers

[rriavian]

Major spoiler warning for the end of The Sandman comics below. Please scroll if you haven't read that far or just if you'd like to avoid them. I've tried to make sure I've tagged properly but just wanted to add an additional warning.

Ok so a while ago @two-hands-toward-the-sun made a post about Daniel Hall and Calliope meeting after he becomes Dream, and it made me curious so I started thinking about what that would be like. Below is the resulting ficlet :)

-

There was a question to be asked when Calliope arrived.

The Furies attack had made its mark, scars left on a realm whole but still healing. Despite that she found the Dreaming felt unchanged; still ever shifting, a constancy in how it reflected every Dreamer, in how it reflected Dream.

That same quality carried, that sense of the new in the old, observed when Calliope met Dream of the Endless in his palace and found him at once so recognisable and yet so very unfamiliar. She found it in hair as white as she knew it had been once before, as she knew it had been so very long ago, Calliope found it in eyes that had never been green but had always been starlit. This was the same sky, just as likely to turn black, currently content to match shades with the emerald hanging around a pale neck, its gold chain glimmering against the now white clothes. It made the pain somewhat easier to feel, made the loss somewhat clearer too, the cut cleaner.

Perhaps it would never heal but the wound wasn’t ragged.

Calliope smiled. “What would you like me to call you?”

For the first time he smiled too.

It was a fine thing for that to be the first thing she witnessed, the first discovery she made of him. Calliope had not seen it on this face—younger, so similar and yet not that at all—watched and learnt the way these features softened and found it lovely. 

“Daniel.” He said; still Dream’s voice, low and soft, not quite like hearing a ghost though, not when the voice of a dream had always been so much more than what was left by the dead. “I chose it.”

There was pride in that.

A child’s. Not immature, just fresh, untainted. Calliope's smile widened even as tears began to well in her eyes. “Very well then Daniel.”

“You may also call me Dream.” He added. 

Calliope nodded. “It’s who you are.”

Another smile.

“It is.”

-

Calliope had been invited.

She found herself curious as to why now.

“What has made things different?” Calliope asked, knowing she was here for more than to attend a funeral. “Morpheus was never ready, you are all he was…”

Daniel waited once she trailed off.

He stood silent while confirming that Calliope wasn’t going to continue. It was only then that Dream picked up the thread Calliope had dropped, it was only then that he revealed that he'd caught it as it fell. “You wish to know what I gained?”

It wasn’t a surprise that he’d untangled her question so effortlessly.

Calliope found that remained just as unsettling as Dream’s perception could so often be. Precise in the way a scalpel was; it cut out only what was needed, went as deep as was required by the wound, cut expertly but it still cut. He was right. Calliope did wish to know what he’d gained, though until he’d said that she’d not been sure it was the right word, the right definition. Daniel Hall had been human. Morpheus had always been Endless.

Calliope didn’t know what to think of the amalgamation of that.

Perhaps she never would, but she could still use a perception all her own to try and find both sides of its coin. “Yes, what you gained…and what you lost.”

“I…” Dream paused but didn't stumble, paused not to find the words but to feel them. “I lost them both. I gained them both. We joined and so became new.”

“Changed.”

“Yes.” He shrugged, so simple a motion for so large a truth. “What is that for one such as me? What can it be. To change is to die, and to die is to change.”

“Our son died.” Calliope said quietly.

“I know.” Daniel said. “I know what that is now.”

“I don’t.” Calliope admitted, her own simple statement for far too large a truth. “Not like a mortal does. How can I mourn when—“

Daniel took her hand. “You can mourn with me.”

Oh.

He was kind, wasn’t he?

So very kind, just like her Oneiros had been. Daniel was dark like him too; sharp, resplendent in it, somehow refreshed like a mortal was after a long sleep, less worn and weary in a world the same as when they'd closed their eyes. The nightmare in him reborn too, as it should be, that cruel aspect rejuvenated because it had never been a wound to cast out. Calliope had never needed to find Dream in the darkness, had never forgot enough of him to try, had known no hand was needed to pull him out of what might be dark but would always be him.

The full spectrum of what a dream was; Dream was as soft as he was sharp, the hand that now held Calliope's was as cold as the action was warm, Dream was cruel—

He was kind.

“It takes time, doesn’t it? For us.” Calliope said quietly, part of her always standing two thousand years away. “How long can grief last when one lives forever.”

Daniel considered that for a moment, heard its threat, its hope. “Perhaps even grief must die.”

“Must change?”

He smiled, this time a little impish, a mischievousness familiar and utterly unique. “Indeed.”

Calliope sighed. “I do not think mine can change the way yours did.”

“No.”

“I suppose that is true for humans too.” Calliope continued, then tested specifics, tested going as far down another thread as she could and wondering if he might once again pick it up. “For other parents. Other mothers.”

Calliope didn't trail off this time, dropped the thread all the same, deliberate and—

It changed hands.

“I have lost a son,” Dream said, his eyes as green as the place where the Bacchante had torn Orpheus apart, as green as the forest that had continued growing nonetheless. “And I have been a son who is lost. I have been taken and I have been taken from. I know what hurts you, Calliope the muse, and I would mourn with you if you’d allow me.”

“You lost a mother.” Calliope realised; breathed it like an ode, where grief expressed the fullest, felt an answer resonate as what could only be given as poetry.

“I am Daniel.” He said, somehow agreed, somehow refuted too, both acknowledged what grief that was and what it couldn’t be. His pause was what lay between stanzas, what inspired the next one to begin. “But I am not Daniel Hall.”

Oh Dream. 

A baby had died—oh that hurt, the thought of Orpheus dead like that, the thought of him having so little time—a mother grieving what could never, ever come back. They had spoken of loss, of Morpheus, of Daniel, because there were really two deaths in this one life. A new pain in that to match what else was gained. Refreshed Dream may be but there was always a burden to bear, always one to carry. That was life, was dreams and nightmares, was balance and perhaps it was restricting to call that a caveat. It was neutrality perhaps, a scale that could tip both ways.

It wasn’t failure that made this hurt.

Calliope nodded. “Then perhaps we can mourn him too?”

Perhaps Dream had tested the dropping of a thread this time. Daniel stilled, looked at her searchingly; eyes now black and aglow with stars, the wonder of looking up at the sky, the wonder of looking down at the earth. They shared that between them. Calliope found herself remembering Orpheus—a child asking to stay up late, an adult asking if she’d like to meet his future wife—remembered a searching look that said I need to be sure.

That said do you really mean it?’

She’d never seen it in Dream, found it now. This fragile sort of wondering, this want revealed as if he’d not yet thought he’d be given the gift. 

As if he’d not known he’d be granted the right. 

Dream nodded at last. 

“Yes.”

[orionsangel86]

Hob Gadling - A Queer Romantic?

I have been listening to The World's End chapters of The Sandman on Audible lately and just finished Hob's Leviathan. I didn't pay this story much attention when I first read the comic, as I tended to read through the stories quickly and put more focus into the stories where Dream had a larger role. But one of the reasons I like listening to the Audible book is because it allows me to absorb each story more thoroughly and take my time thinking about each one and the (usually multiple) meanings behind them.

Hob Gadling is a character that fandom has fallen in love with. I think this is clear to anyone that takes even a partial glance at Sandman fandom. This isn't a criticism - Ferdie's performance as Hob in the Netflix show has done wonders for Hob's character. He has made his version of Hob very easy to fall in love with!

But the truth is that in The Sandman comics, Hob is a minor character who we only get to know very little about. The story Hob's Leviathan appears in The Worlds End Sandman book. We only meet him twice before this, once in The Doll's House, where we are introduced to him in Men of Good Fortune, and again in Season of Mists when Dream comes to let him know that he may miss their next meeting. In both these issues, Hob is introduced via the narrator, and therefore I like to think that we are given a fairly honest representation of the kind of person he is. We watch him grow and learn throughout the centuries in MoGF, but one of the major takeaways from this I believe is that he tends to always be on the wrong side of history. He makes bad choices and can be a bit narrow minded. He is rude and selfish and also rather self-absorbed. I actually think that the performance of the voice actor who plays Hob in the Audible book emphasises these character flaws making him even more unlikeable in many ways, though I am aware that this could just be my own experience and opinion.

But Hob's Leviathan takes a different view of Hob. Literally. The narrator of this story is a young boy of 16 called Jim. Jim met Hob on a ship travelling from Bombay to Liverpool in 1914. Jim was working on the ship as a cabin boy and Hob had bought his passage back to England - though it is revealled at the end of the story that Hob actually owned the ship they were travelling on. It is clear that at this point in time, Hob is extremely wealthy.

Jim attends to Hob throughout the journey, and grows very fond of him. In Jim's tale, Hob is a good man, who is kind and thoughtful and cares about others. He saves the life of a stowaway (who turns out to be another immortal). He is shown to be patient, and funny, and very intelligent. Jim waxes poetic about how smart Hob is, and how much he impressed him. It is particularly clear in the Audible book that Jim is taken with Hob, to the point that it could arguably be a crush.

It is fascinating how much more likeable Hob is when narrated from the viewpoint of someone with a crush on him, whether this story is exaggerated through rose tinted glasses is of course something to consider. All the tales in World's End are just that, tales. There is a constant undercurrent of exaggeration and make believe to them where even the other patrons of the inn question elements to each of the stories. We are not supposed to take these stories as absolute fact, rather they are supposed to reveal to us more about the narrators as well as their own experiences existing in this magical and strange world.

When it is revealled that Jim is actually a girl called Peggy in disguise so they can get work on the ships, the quite obvious crush makes more sense to a heteronormative audience, but what I particularly like about this story is its queer potential. See in the comic, it isn't really clarified if Jim goes by Jim because they feel more themselves as a boy, rather than a girl, or if they are disguising themself as a boy just to get work as a means to an end. I would argue that the latter is the more obvious interpretation. Jim tells the other World's End patrons that they are getting too old to keep up the disguise and will eventually have to stop working in shipping, and that when that happens, they will take on a new name, a new identity and do something else, but that for now, the patrons can keep calling them Jim.

*for a lack of clarity around the point in the comic, I am going to use gender neutral pronouns for Jim going forward*

Now from Hob's POV, he figured out that Jim was a girl, and they talk about it briefly along with the sea serpent they saw. I think that at this point, Hob is impressively progressive compared to the previous times we have met him. Now whether or not this is biased storytelling from someone who has a crush on him remains to be seen, but if we take Jim's word as truth, not only is 1914 Hob a fair and honest man who is willing to pay the way of a stowaway and fully respect the secrets of a young girl disguised as a boy so they can work on ships, but he's also totally comfortable flirting with them.

I like that he calls Jim the "handsome cabin boy". I like that this version of Hob, whether real or an exaggeration skewed by Jim's feelings for him, respects Jim's identity. Jim may be a girl in disguise, but Hob doesnt call her pretty, he calls him handsome.

It's all just a bit subtly queer and I like that for Hob (But then I would do, I'm a Dreamling shipper HA)

When Jim finishes their story, they state that they didn't see Hob again after that, but the comics later do give us a possible outcome to Jim's story...

We next see Hob in The Kindly Ones where he is mourning the death of his girlfriend Audrey. He briefly reveals that Audrey was the first person he had loved since Peggy, who was his lover until her death during the Blitz. Whilst it isn't made clear that Hob's lover Peggy is the same Jim that we meet in World's End, it is a bit too much of a coincidence. The timing adds up. If Jim was 16 in 1914, they'd be in their early 40s during the Blitz. Hob remains forever in his early 30s so I'd say its a safe bet that Jim eventually found Hob again and they were together. Hob loved them enough that he wasn't with anyone again until Audrey in the 80s. That's 50 years worth of mourning. A long time not to be with anyone, even for an immortal.

It's funny because we know so little about Hob, but one thing that I have seen commented on here a lot is that comic Hob is deemed to be as Straight as an arrow. Now I admit that the voice actor in the Audible book plays him very straight, but that is still only one interpretation.

All this is to say that I am fascinated with how the Netflix show will adapt this, since Hob in the show already comes across much kinder and more selfless than his comic counterpart. He already has an entire fandom viewing him as queer, and the comics certainly don't outright shut down such interpretations. There are moments in the comics that you have to wonder on. He does call Jim handsome rather than pretty, and when he talks to Audrey's grave he mentions his wives and loves as separate groups. He talks about finding it easy to get sex if you want it, and he talks about it in generally gender neutral terms. In Sunday Mourning Gwen reveals that she thought he was gay when she first met him, though her reasonings were that he knew so many dead people (a dark reminder that these comics were published at the height of the Aids epidemic). He reacts very badly to the news of Morpheus' death. He states on several occassions just how much he liked Morpheus, and he is one of the few people to wake up from the Wake with tears running down his cheeks. I would arguably state that its between Hob and Matthew as to who had the worst reaction to Morpheus' death, showing just how much both Hob and Matthew cared about him, and placing Hob on par with Matthew in the comics is a big deal. He seriously considers accepting Death's gift when she offers it, simply because Morpheus is dead. He doesn't, because at the end of the day, its just not in his nature to do so, and given he then dreams of Morpheus, I like to think that it was a test, that he passed.

When it comes to how the show will adapt all this, I genuinely think it will take a new approach with Jim/Peggy. I think they will be either a trans man, or at least non binary. But I think having Jim be a trans man is the better option. In the comics, Jim's tale is only very subtly queer, Jim clearly likes being Jim, but it seems like its a means to an end, a convenience in order to get work on the ships, rather than being something that is core to Jim's feelings on their gender. Besides, if we assume that Jim is indeed the Peggy Hob talks about in The Kindly Ones, then we know that Jim goes back to being Peggy when they get older and apparently continues living as a woman whilst they are with Hob, otherwise I doubt Hob would have referred to one of his greatest loves by a name they themselves rejected and only used she/her pronouns when talking about them. Nevertheless there is no reason for the show to take this approach, and if they DO decide that Jim should be a trans man, then their relationship with Hob is canonically a queer one. Trans men are men and if one of Hob's greatest loves is a trans man, then Hob is a queer man himself. I genuinely believe the show will take this route and I can't wait to see it.

Going back to my point about narrators bias, if MoGF, SoM, tKO, and TW are all narrated by a neutral third party, then this must be the true Hob. A not overly likeable rather selfish man. He has his good points, and he has certainly grown and changed over the centuries, and carries a lot of guilt for his past mistakes, but he is still quite self absorbed. Jim paints a picture of a rose tinted Hob that is far more the dreamy romantic older gentleman that took a young person under his wing. Which is fair enough.

The show is of course its own adaptation, with changes from the comics as it sees fit, but I do feel it's my duty to remind you that the show also has a narrator guiding the audience through its many stories. Dream of the Endless, Lord Morpheus, King of Nightmares and Prince of Stories himself. Take from that whatever you will.

;-)

[onehundredandeleventropicalfish]

you know, i can't wait to see season of mists in the show, yes to watch certain pieces fall into place for later story and for one particular dream hob conversation

but also because it really is in so many ways just the funniest volume

and i've seen some of those funny moments get mentioned

i've yet to see anyone list dream's defeat of azazel among them

but like. let's lay this out. so dream already has about 500 problems to deal with, at least 300 of which are queueing up in the dreaming telling him to give them the keys to hell or they're gonna [insert threat here], when all he wants to do is rescue nada and maybe also sulk in his bedroom for a bit

when problem #501 shows up - azazel would like hell back so they can make it even worse, and they've brought nada as a bargaining chip to ensure it. they also throw in choronzon for free, because everyone else has been offering gifts, and dream likes revenge, right? yeah, revenge, that'll definitely get him to like us

azazel mostly behaves themselves during the actual negotiations (mostly), bc they're sure they've won, and no need to cause a scene and make more enemies than they have to. but when they realise that's not the case, they threaten to eat nada if dream can't get them what they want

to which, in a move that made me realise exactly why dream gets along so much better with fey than he does humans, he reminds azazel that everyone who crosses the threshold of his realm is entitled to his hospitality, including nada (thanks for bringing her here for me btw, saves me the trip), so if azazel harms her in any way they'll no longer be entitled to dream's protection

and azazel is like fuck you fuck your hospitality i can eat anyone i goddamn like

so we get that challenge between the two of them taking place inside azazel who is kind of a realm in their own right, which, when dream wins, azazel tries to pull a lucifer "why should i let you leave?"

and yes. dream is currently in azazel's void. azazel could try to eat him from in there, regardless of who won. but see, lucifer had one thing azazel doesn't, which is remembering whose fucking house you're in

azazel's entire realm, entire self, is still inside the dreaming. regardless of where dream's physical manifestation is, demons have no power here.

you really shouldn't have denied my hospitality.

and since dramatic irony is the order of the day, dream's then just like "so, what was it you were promising, again? nada and some, uh, sweet sweet vengeance? yeeeaaaah i think i remember you saying something about that. hey azazel? what are your opinions on glass spheres."

and then he turns to the vast assortment of gods and similar he's been trying to get rid of for two days and is like "any arguments? no? cool, get the fuck out of my house."

[mid0khan]

Dreamling Week 2024, day 2

We are back with another fic for day 2! Thanks again @mr-sadman for the promt, I had a lot of fun with this one.

This one contain Major Spoilers for the comics! Read at your own risk, the fic is under the cut.

Prompt: Flowers

Title: Farewell, my lovely

Summary: Hob woke up with tears streaming down his face. He had dreamed of a wake. Morpheus’ wake. (2,046 words, TW Major character death, Grief/Mourning)

Read on AO3:

Hob woke up with tears streaming down his face.

He had dreamed of a wake. Morpheus’ wake.

He let out a nervous laugh. What a weird dream! …It had only been a dream, nothing more, right?

Right?

He reached for the necklace Morpheus had given him the day of their first kiss, a small garnet set on a golden chain, always cold like his lover’s skin, and buzzing with a tiny fragment of Dream’s power, so Hob could contact him whenever he wanted to. Morpheus would answer, and Hob would feel stupid for being scared by a simple nightmare, and they would both laugh about it later. Or more likely, Hob would laugh, and Dream would smile the way he always did when he was amused by his lover’s antics.

The stone was warm against his skin; it rested lifeless in his palm, devoid of the cosmic energy it usually shone with.

“Morpheus?” Hob called, trying his best not to panic. “Morpheus, love, are you there?”

The jewel stayed silent in his hand.

“Baby, darling, please answer. I need you to answer. Please, Morpheus, that’s not funny, say something. Love please say something. You can’t do that to me, please, I beg you, please, talk to me. Morpheus? MORPHEUS???”

Hob called and begged, increasingly desperate for an answer. None came. The garnet was nothing more than an ordinary stone.

An agonized sob tore itself up Hob’s throat. He curled up into himself, hugging the necklace against his chest as he cried. The dream had been real. Morpheus was dead. He was gone forever.

Hob knew that Morpheus had been unhappy for a long time, even before they met. He had seemed happier after they became lovers, but he had still not been okay. And it had been fine, Hob knew there was a lot of healing to do and it would take time.

He thought they had eternity ahead of them.

Did Morpheus fight to survive? Or did he give up, and go willingly?

Selfishly, Hob hoped his love had done everything in his power to live. To come back to him.

But more than anything he hoped Morpheus had not suffered. He hoped he had not spent his last moments alone, scared and hurt.

Through the grief, Hob felt anger growing. Anger at whoever caused Morpheus’ death. Anger that he wasn’t even given the chance to say goodbye. Anger at Destiny and Desire, who didn’t even try to look like they cared as they said their brother’s eulogy. Anger at Despair, for saying everyone would forget him eventually.

Hob forced himself to breath calmly despite the sobs. He had worked hard for decades to learn to control his anger. He wouldn’t let it win now. He was stronger than that.

He promised himself that he would prove her wrong. He might forget the exact sound of Morpheus’ voice, or the precise colour of his eyes. His memories of his smiles, his mannerisms, his smell may fade with time. Maybe one day he won’t even remember what pet names they used for each other, or how it felt to hold him in his arms. But he would never forget him ever.

When the sobs subsided enough that Hob didn’t feel like his whole chest was trying to climb up his throat, he forced himself to get out of bed. He refused to let himself fall to pieces like he had in the 1600s. He would keep living, and he would find joy again. And at the end of everything, when the universe will have collapsed and he’ll have no choice but to die, he’ll have a lot of stories to tell his beloved.

He stood and got dressed in a daze, feeling like he was watching his body move from afar. He crossed his flat aimlessly, trying to find something to do, anything to take his mind off the grief; he froze in his living room: on one of his bookshelves, there was a picture of Morpheus and him from when the Endless had agreed to accompany him at a work event. Hob was wearing a brown suit, grinning widely and waving at the camera, his free hand clasping his lover’s. Morpheus, gorgeous in a black that shone like the night sky, was looking at him, his face soft with a mix of fond amusement and adoration. It had only been two weeks earlier.

He broke down crying again.

When Hob managed to regain his composure, he pushed himself out of his flat. He remembered one of his ancient students had opened a flower shot not too far from the New Inn, and he decided to go there.

“Hello Anthony,” Hob called as he entered the shop, announced by the light jingling of a bell. The young man emerged between two rows of flowers.

“Professor Godl- oh my god are you okay?”

Hob tried to give a reassuring smile, but it felt more like a grimace. It probably looked like it too if Anthony’s worried expression was anything to go by.

“My partner…” His voice broke and Hob had to take a deep breath. “My partner died.” He fought the tears that threatened to spill again. “I would like a bouquet? Please.”

The florist gently pulled him in the staff room and sat him at a small table, pushing a cup of tea in his hands. He must have really looked terrible, Hob thought.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Anthony whispered. “Do you have something in mind for the bouquet?”

“I don’t know… I want it to mean something. He really liked symbolism, you know. But I’ve never really gotten into flower language…”

“It’s okay, it’s my job to use it.” Anthony grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. “Just tell me what you want to say and I’ll make it.”

Hob thought for a moment.

“I want to tell him I love him. As my partner, but as my friend, too. And I always will. I want him to know I’ll miss him, but the most important is that I will never forget him. And there need to be poppies,” he added after a pause. “Those flowers meant a lot to him.”

“Okay, I can do that.” The florist finished writing everything down before looking at Hob again. “Today is very calm so I can do your bouquet now; it will take some time though. Do you want to stay here while I make it?”

“No, I think I’ll go walk for a bit. Clear my mind, all of that.”

“Are you sure?” Anthony asked hesitantly. Hob shrugged.

“Yes, don’t worry about me.”

“…Okay,” the young man accepted reluctantly. “Just give me a phone number so I can call you when the flowers are ready.”

Hob obliged before leaving the shop. He stood in front of it for a time, wondering where he might go. He thought about going to the New Inn, but quickly changed his mind. Too soon, too many memories tied to the place. He went in the opposite direction and let his feet guide him aimlessly.

He walked without a destination for what felt like hours, just happy to let the fresh air empty his thoughts. He still caught worried looks from a handful of passers-by, but at least he didn’t feel so bad anymore. He knew it was only a question of time before the pain came back. For now, he just felt numb; it was a relief, in a way.

He was forced out of his altered state of mind by Anthony’s call. He had only been gone an hour, which was enough to walk very far as it turned out. He took the tube going back to the shop, not wanting to make the florist wait for too long.

He was greeted with a gorgeous flower arrangement: there were shades of crimson and scarlet, with roses and poppies and something else he wasn’t really sure of the name, surrounded by deep green leaves and cushioned on a cloud of flowers in soft whites and pastel blues.

“It’s beautiful,” Hob whispered. “What are those flowers?” he asked, pointing to the red ones he didn’t know.

“Red carnation. The mean true, romantic love. You probably recognized the roses, they mean grief, and the poppies of course, they mean remembrance and peaceful rest.” Anthony designed blue and white flowers. “Those are hydrangeas, they mean devotion. The big white ones are chrysanthemums, for deep friendship, and the tiny blue ones are forget-me-nots, the name is self-explanatory really. Do you like it?”

“Yes, it’s perfect.” Hob caressed the blossoms with reverence.

He paid for the bouquet and walked to the door, but he stopped before opening it. Next to it was a display of orchids. He couldn’t take his eyes off a black one, right in the middle.

“Anthony? What do orchids mean?”

“They can have different meanings; they often symbolize charm, thoughtfulness and beauty. They can also mean: I will always love you.”

“How much for the black one?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. See it as a thank you for the great time I had in your class.”

Hob thanked him profusely and left with the orchid.

He walked to what remained of the White Horse; climbing the fence without damaging the flowers proved harder than expected, but he managed. He left the orchid next to the door and entered, the bouquet cradled in his arms.

It was dark inside the old alehouse. A few chairs and tables remained, abandoned there when the place had closed down. The main room reeked of mould, and thick dust bunnies covered every surface. A deep feeling of melancholia filled Hob, but he didn’t let himself linger on it. He rummaged behind the old bar for a few minutes before finding a forgotten glass. He used it as a vase for the flowers, which he put on a table that didn’t look too damaged.

“I know it’s not ideal, but it was the best I could think of,” he whispered in the silent tavern. “You don’t have a grave, so it will have to do anyway. Do you like the bouquet?” He paused, taking a fortifying breath. “I needed to say goodbye. In my own way. Your wake was crowded, which was fine, it was nice to see so many people caring for you. But it felt a bit too much… public, you know? I want some private time to speak to you. So I can try to move on.” His voice broke and he had to look away from the flowers to keep the tears from spilling. “I just wanted to say that I hope you’re okay, wherever you are now. I miss you, yes, already, but don’t worry, I’ll be fine eventually, you know me, always going forward,” he spat with a joyless laugh. “What I need you to know is, I don’t care what you siblings said. I will not forget you, ever. Even if I move on, even if millennia go by, I’ll always remember you. Because I love you.” He had to stop, sobs forcing their way out of his chest. He fell on his knees, hugging himself tight as he wept until his throat was sore. When finally the cries subsided, he stood, exhausted and numb. He caressed the flowers a last time. “Farewell, my lovely.”

He picked the orchid up and fled the ruins of the White Horse.

Hob walked home in a dissociated state. He suddenly found himself in front of his flat’s door with no memory of his way back.

It was still early in the day, but he felt too tired to try and do anything, so he decided to go back to bed. He didn’t think he would sleep, but he didn’t have the strength to stay up. He went to his bedroom and placed the black orchid on his bedside table. On a whim, he went back and grabbed the picture of Morpheus and him in his living room, putting it next to the flower. He lay down on his side, turned toward the picture, staring at his lover’s smile made blurry by unshed tears.

He fell asleep with his fingers tracing the contours of Morpheus’ face, and dreamed of a beach.

[0fthelilim]

MAJOR COMIC SPOILERS !!

i think we as a fandom to not talk about lyta enough so i decided to take matters into my own hands. with an attempt at fanfic (?)

1.3k words, 1/1. taking place post-series.

lyta hall enjoyers this is specifically for you 🤲❤️

[mentallyinvernation]

(〜 *◇*)〜 aaaaangst~

❛ you can’t save everyone. ❜

Right, so this one got incredibly out of hand, and the full fic is now gonna be on ao3 for the bingo adsfdgfh. But! Here's a snip with the angst prompt in it.

TW: discussion of canon deaths, mcd, and implied suicide.

Also, this has a lot of comic spoilers! It follows the events of The Wake, so be careful reading.

------

“Your wake was shit,” Hob tells the grave, sitting cross-legged and picking at the grass. “Don’t really remember much of it, if I’m being honest. That’s the trouble with dreams, I suppose. Heard the guest list was a right riot, though. A whole bloody universe. Christ. Had a flair for the dramatic even in death.” Hob’s lips twitch a little, a hearth of fondness smouldering away in him. “Hettie’s tried to reach out a couple of times. Don’t even really bloody know the woman. Keeps calling me Gadlink. Also met your sister. Feels a bit overdue, and the circumstances were buggered, but…she seems nice. Matthew has checked in a few times - he pops by when things get a bit much back home. Everything’s fine there. Matthew and Lucienne have it under control. They’re busy helping the new kid find his feet.” Something unhappy squirms and flips in his stomach. “Daniel. He’s doing his best. The Dreaming is - well, it’s okay. It’s going to be okay, I promise. I’m sure you already knew that…but ah, I thought I ought to let you know anyway. Just in case.”

Hob only remembers the details of Dream’s funeral through scattered increments, like rays of light reflecting off glass, of faceless crowds, a stone cathedral, and a chained book. Hettie claims to remember the whole affair in vivid detail, and Hob respectfully thinks she’s full of shit. The only reason Hob knows Dream is gone for certain is thanks to Death showing up at Ren Faire to confirm his worst nightmare. Losing Dream has always been so beyond the realm of probability - so outside the box of rational fate that Hob doesn’t really know where he's supposed to go from here. 

“You’ve always had a knack for the impossible,” Hob gives the grave a quick smile, aiming for lighthearted and landing somewhere in the ballpark of heartbroken, picking apart one unlucky blade of grass between his fingers. “Part of your nature, I s’pose. I’d say the sky's the limit, but not even the end of the universe was the limit when it came to you. If it can be dreamed or thought, it can be done, right?”

The orange glow of a sinking sunset frames the cross. Hob swallows.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is…a part of me was hoping you might pull this off. Just this one last impossible thing. And look, I know you’re not really here - Christ, I’m just talking to a piece of wood, but the thing is -“ Hob’s heart rushes up his throat. “I miss you.” He admits quietly, a gentle breeze tousling his hair. “I miss you so fucking much I can’t breathe sometimes. So, I’m asking you to do this one last impossible thing. For me. Come back. Please just - come back. I don’t know how to...” 

Hob's head hangs as he exhales sharply, wishing he knew what happened. Matthew’s kept his beak sealed shut about that - the little fucker disappeared out the kitchen window when Hob tried to interrogate him, demanding to know if there was someone to be held accountable. Anyone. Granted, one name, just one, would have sent him on a warpath to square off with whatever universe-bending force could have taken out someone like Dream. But still.

“Look, I can’t tell you, alright? It’s not that I don’t want to, I’m just not sure you’re in the best palace to hear it right now, man. And Daniel - It’s complicated.”

“Then un-complicate it, Matthew! Either he was murdered, or -”

Or.

Matthew had looked at him with so,  so  much sympathy and sorrow. Impressive, really, for a bird.

Regardless of the how or why, Hob still wishes he could have been there. To help. To stop it. To…to just be there, in Dream’s final moments.

You can’t save everyone, Hob. 

It’s a bitter pill to swallow. One he struggles with time and time again, dragging mangled bodies across battlefields in the hopes of reaching a medic in time, heedless of the bullets or steel tearing apart his own flesh. Or hiding out in a bunker as the Blitz rained down on the streets of London, clutching the hand of a dearly beloved as her heart gave out. Or of his own flesh and blood who smiled and waved goodbye at the door one evening to go to a tavern he would never return from.

“I’ve buried so many people, Dream.” Hob whispers, oblivious to the haunted note that strings through his voice, pulling his legs up to his chest and staring sightlessly at the ground. “So many. But I never thought - “ Something dislodges in his chest, and it punches a wounded sound from him, similar to the low keen of an animal that’s been shot. “I never thought I’d have to bury you .”

There wasn’t even a body. He buried a coat. 

The rickety dam in him cracks, and he clenches shut both eyes, tears trailing a scalding heat down his cheeks as he burrows his face between his knees, shoulders shaking as a series of silent sobs wrack through him. His chest aches. It hurts so much worse than any wound of the flesh could.

Hob stays like that for a long while, mourning a friend, his oldest friend. Perhaps more than that, if only they’d had more time - which feels like a selfish ask, all things considered. But Hob is greedy. He would have taken everything Dream was willing to give. Every century. Every second.

And now it's over.

[radiantmists]

based on the setup im guessing there's some deeper plot here but it was extremely funny of lucifer to just ditch dream with the key to hell, and im a little sad that's not the direction the show seems to be going

[briscoelily]

-

[princeoftenderness]

.

[fucktheroyals]

okay the last reblog singlehandedly made me wanna read the comics.

[rriavian]

Okay, so I'm sending a more detailed explanation in an ask so I can show you some of the comic pages that stuck out to me in particular. Also, once again, major comic spoilers here, I pretty much just have to explain the whole plot of TKO in order to explain why Morpheus's manipulation style is so spot on in your writing, so this is your final warning for spoilers

So I'm not sure how much you know about the plot of The Kindly Ones, but a major aspect of it is that part of Morpheus wants to escape the role of Dream of the Endless, but can't bring himself to leave like Destruction did. He also can't seem to believe that he's capable of change, which is one really major change that was made in the show, cause by the end of season 1, Dream's acknowledge that he is capable of change. Anyway, but the question is, and this can be debated heavily, how much did his desire to stop being Dream of the Endless played into what ended up happening.

So basically at the end of Season of Mists, he makes a deal with Loki, that he'd create a dream-thing to play the part of Loki in Loki's prison, which would allow Loki to go free and also put him in Dream's debt. Now, fast forward to TKO, and Loki kidnaps Daniel. Dream then sends a newly remade Corinthian and Matthew to search for him, while Lyta is on the warpath. This of course leads to what ends up happening, Lyta setting the Kindly Ones on Morpheus, eventually The Corinthian and Matthew finding Daniel and bringing him to the Dreaming, which does calm Lyta down, but by then there's no calling off the Kindly Ones, and I presume you know how that ends.

Anyway, but the question is, what led Loki to kidnapping Daniel in the first place. I saw the theory that Dream actually called in the favor with Loki to kidnap him, but I personally don't believe that. I think it makes more sense that Loki, who didn't want to owe anyone anything, kidnapped Daniel because he knew it would lead to Lyta calling the Kindly Ones on Morpheus, leading to his downfall and thus no more debt is owed.

This comment by Odin sells that for me, it seems to imply that there was no getting a favor back from Loki, Loki would find some other way out of the debt. Which makes me think that Morpheus didn't cash in his favor with Loki

Odin goes on to make this comment about Morpheus though, which is absurdly similar to a comment The Corinthian makes about him in your series. And Morpheus's answer here is very classic Morpheus.

Now, it's later implied that there was definitely some manipulation on Morpheus's part going on. And once again, there's another statement made that bears striking resemblance to The Corinthian realizing how thoroughly he had been manipulated in your writing

So here's what I think happened. Dream knew the character of Loki as he knows everyone. He knew that Loki would do anything to get out of paying a debt. So by having Loki in his debt, he would be ensuring that someone would be going to any lengths to see him destroyed. Morpheus would put up every fight he possibly could, he would not let himself die without doing that, after all, that's why he couldn't just quit like Destruction and give up his responsibilities. He would protect the Dreaming until the Dreaming required him to sacrifice his life for it. And then he could finally have peace.

But if all this is true, then Loki did exactly as Morpheus wanted. If all this is true, then Morpheus was the true manipulator. And just this style of ensuring that he wins no matter the outcome, strikes me as very similar as to how Morpheus manipulates The Corinthian in your series. He was always going to win, he had what he wanted from the beginning. Sort of like how the moment he had Loki in his debt, all he had to do was wait for the scene to play out and let everyone act as their nature would allow.

I think that Morpheus probably would have preferred fewer people be hurt in this, because I think that fundamentally, he cares so much about the Dreaming and humanity. Which is why he couldn't just abandon his responsibilities, no matter what The Corinthian might say.

But I think this highlights the main reason I was so shocked that you hadn't read the comics.

There are other things too, things about Morpheus's character that becomes very evident as you read TKO, but are there are hints of in the show, such as how he handles vulnerability. He simultaneously lets himself be vulnerable while also not allowing himself to truly be vulnerable and it's very interesting. He like wields his own vulnerability as a weapon against himself in a sort of "you can't hurt me if I do it first/ you can't really hurt me if I just let you" and also a "My weaknesses are so far above you're strengths that it does me no harm to be vulnerable" sort of way. That aspect of his character I think is particularly evident in TKO, but definitely can be seen in the show as well.

Then there's the way that he has no qualms about letting other people define him. He will play whatever role he needs to for a means to an end, so it doesn't matter to him how you see him. Which is very evident in his response to Odin, "you have known me for some time, old god. Which would you say that I am?" it doesn't matter to Morpheus if he's the cunning spider or the hunted deer, all that matters is that he sees his end reached.

So yeah, this has been very long-winded, but you probably can see why I was absolutely astonished that you hadn't read the comics.

Also, to comment on what you said about hating misunderstandings which leads you to try to be as close to canon as possible as far as characterization goes, I completely get that. As someone who also hates misunderstands because I've been misunderstood too many times before, I too try to capture the fullness of a character in all their complexities when writing, I'm not sure if I succeed, but it matters a lot to me. Dream was also my way in to the fandom, he just makes sense to me, you know? I find him to be rather relatable in some ways and I've never struggled to understand why he does what he does or is the way he is. But all of this might be why I find your version of Morpheus to be so accurate.

The funny thing is, Corintheus isn't normally my thing. I've always found myself drawn to ships that are a friends to lovers sort of situation, which is why Dreamling is my main ship for this fandom. But your fics have permanently altered my brain chemistry. Just the power dynamics throughout them are just so interesting. First time I ever recall reading fics that were mostly porn for the plot lmaooo

Anyway, this has gotten quite long, but I hope you enjoyed reading my thought process here

I’m still in awe of every word of this. Just—honestly this is incredible! Thank you so much for putting so much thought into it, getting feedback like this is the most incredible thing, and I’m always ready to talk about any aspect of the series that has jumped out to people. I actually have a bit or dialogue set in the BTT verse around the time of the Kindly Ones. But I think my plan is to read along as the show does its thing. I’m not afraid of spoilers but probably won’t engage with comic stuff too much as they are very much separate entities. I want to keep my versions pretty distinct, as I’m writing for show canon.

So disclaimer - I've still not read the comics.

Dream’s characterisation is a direct result of how I view power, its various dynamics, and what that might mean to an essentially near all powerful being.

It was important to me to take the humanity out of it. Very specifically meaning humanity as a species, not necessarily as a morality. I’ve seen it used it interchangeably but inhuman doesn’t always mean immoral—doesn’t always mean a lack of personhood either—and the interchangeability is very indicative of our own bias on what being good (or even what being real) means.

Your point about vulnerability and how I write it is one of the results of this. What is vulnerability? And why do we usually shy away from being seen that way? Why do we assume that everyone else should/does act the same? It’s a loss of power, a felt helplessness, and how perspectives on that would differ in someone like Dream is very interesting to me. Arguably there’s no reluctance in actions we as viewers would see as weak—no real loss of control—which is exactly why him letting someone hurt him, or hurting himself before they can, work as things that disguise themselves as vulnerability while being a subtle way to deny an advantage.

It's like—what can you do that I will not allow? That I will not do willingly.

Even while being trapped by Burgess Dream never allows himself to be drawn into a dialogue. He refuses to engage entirely, doesn't acknowledge it as a fight, and while it could be seen as petty pride it's still Dream resolving to just take the imprisonment for what it is.

For me it’s an example of Dream being so powerful he can actually take the most extreme of hits, doesn’t always even see them as hits (like in Baiting the Trap). It's why I see Dream’s constant need to be in control of the collective subconscious as not necessarily incompatible with his appearances/allowances of vulnerability. From what Dream said in the show his experience seems to be a constant awareness of the entirety of human feeling. Dream can’t let it overwhelm him, has rules to protect himself, but he’s never had one moment of his existence where he’s not been standing right in the thick of it.

To him it’s normal, and I think the intensity of the storm he’s constantly standing in really factors into his responses externally. There’s very little that can compare with his normal existence and I think his true vulnerability is very much related to that internal, individual, fight that is really one he has with an aspect of his own self.

Again. It’s ‘what can you do to me that could ever match the battle within’.

You could say Dream brings this to its natural conclusion in the comics by finally ending the situation with Orpheus (again, I don’t exactly know what happens). It seems like he puts himself in a state where he’s ready for things to end, does the one thing that would ensure there’s no turning back, triggering the fate planned for him himself to deliberately rob anyone else of the chance to do the same thing.

He’s the instigator and that means he can be his own victim rather than be forced to be anyone else's.

I've got a lot more on this point so happy to expand!

Going back to BTT and power dynamics, I saw a post that really resonated with how I write that ended up being an explanation of some ideas from The Art of War, because apparently I’ve accidentally been writing battle tactics all this time. I’m happy to expand on it if anyone is interested (this answer got so so long my goodness!) but the three points that most stuck out to me as what I use are the following:

Manipulate what your enemy views as orthodox and unorthodox behaviours. By feigning orthodox behaviour, you set your opponent up for attack through unorthodox action. Eg. Appear weak when you are strong.

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself.

A large group striking a small group is not held in high esteem, but a small group striking a larger force is.

This is sort of the cheat code to everything I've ever written, and explains a lot about how I construct narratives. Erm, I didn't address everything you said so happy to do a part 2 if you want? This got very long! The amount I cut from this answer probably shows how much I’ve thought about this series haha. I apparently have like ten thousand different layers to this in even my own head.

[orionsangel86]

Not to go all smug Destiel shipper on main...

But we DID SAY it would be a domino to trigger a change in the climate.

You dont trend a gay angelic love confession over an historic US election and not get studio bigwigs attention.

All that money the CW could have made and yet squandered...

Now we got OFMD, we got the Sandman, we got WWDITS, we got a Good Omens *REDACTED*👀

All im saying is one gay angel walked into Superhell so the girlies could celebrate the end of queerbaiting and a new golden age of middle aged men kissing on screen ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[onehundredandeleventropicalfish]

I keep going back and forth in my mind on whether or not they should keep the story a tradegy and what they will do. What my mind keeps coming back to is the quote "all the great stories return to their original form". Which makes me think that they'll keep it a tragic story. But then I think about how the reason it is tragic is because Morpheus doesn't see himself as capable of change. So what better way to prove him wrong than the idea that stories can grow and change?

Idk what they'll do. I'm sure it'll be amazing either way.

i mean this story is absolutely full of unreliable narrators, the returning to their original form is a dream quote, which says a lot about him as a person, not necessarily anything about neil gaiman

but yeah, i mean. i like well written tragedies, because well written tragedies are one of the best devices for a story about hope, and i think that's what this is

one of the reasons i love hadestown as a story is it specifically calls this out and gets meta with it, but in any tragedy - it's about catharsis, you know?

there's something important in that rock bottom moment, and in experiencing that as a collective. catharsis is an ancient greek word, from the origin of theatre, we're talking plays, things that were experienced by a large audience. ancient greek plays actually used to be short so you could watch a whole bunch of them in a row during festivals to dionysus, it was a whole big Thing

it comes from the word meaning cleansing, and the ancient greeks believed there was something important to that, to watching something terrible happen in a safe space, where it's not real, where you know the actors are fine, and where hundreds of other people are crying with you - you feel for these characters and that sadness is a great emotional release

and i think that's true, it's certainly something i feel with well written tragedies. but i don't think that's all there is to it

there's an instinct shared by absolutely everybody who watches tragedies, something i honestly think is incredible but somehow is universal, and that's that gut feeling that hooks you and goes no this has to turn out right this time

look at what's happening just on this blog today, i'm getting so many responses of people going no, we get another shot, he has to make it this time, this has to be okay, because this isn't right

and i'm serious about not knowing which way this'll fall and being fine with either way, i've just ended up being the tragedy advocate today because everyone else is doing the above and i like it both ways

but it's that instinct that's important. because it's not just something that happens when you don't know the ending. you could have a tragedy in a movie that you have on dvd, and you've watched it 50 times over or more, to the point where you could quote every line. and there will still be that part of you going maybe this time. maybe this time it'll work

stories with happy endings can certainly be inspiring, to the right person, at the right time. but when you're in a really tough spot there's no guarantee your life will turn out like the character's. maybe you don't get as lucky, maybe you get the worst case scenario, and then what? it's hard to fight that on your own

but a tragedy takes you to that worst case scenario. it tells you this is a situation where there is absolutely no way out. and even if you believed there was no way out already, suddenly you find that part of yourself going wait, no, there was a way out, why didn't you take it? if you just had another chance, you'd take it. this wouldn't play out the same way. and if it did, i'd try again. i'd try as many times as i'm willing to watch this story, because i'm never going to accept that this was inevitable

tragedies force the audience to confront that in their darkest moments, they will still fight for things to be better, even when they know everything is lost. and i think in a story about depression, that's really important

(and yeah, the theme of sandman is to keep living you have to keep changing, and to keep changing you have to keep living. but there are so many other characters in this story who embody that, who are there to set an example when an example is needed. look at how popular hob's gotten just from half an episode appearance. and yeah that's partially for shippy reasons, but also he's one of the biggest carriers of the hopeful message, and people have gotten that loud and clear)

so like. if they change it, which will probably end up being along the lines of the retirement au some of the fandom have got going on, i'm absolutely down for that, and i think it will still be a beautiful and meaningful story

and i'm not arguing with all the people going no, we get a retry, we have to fix this, because it's important that they're doing that! that's the whole point! but the fact that they are also means this story's done its job

[qqueenofhades]

Good Omens Season 2: Some Thoughts (and also Screaming)

First, /screams

Second, obligatory disclaimer that this meta contains MAJOR SPOILERS for all six episodes. If you somehow have managed to remain virginally unspoiled, look away now, scroll past, or add "good omens s2" and "good omens spoilers" to your block list, as those are the tags I have been using for all posts and reblogs.

Third, /screams more

Okay okay okay. Deep breaths.

Anyway, so, uh, how about all that, huh? First, the good thing about the tone of the season overall was that it felt considerably darker and more adult, in a good way. We didn't have the precocious kiddies, the kitsch and literally-comphet Anathema and Newt, the so-clever narration, etc. All that was gone, which makes sense when you consider that a) the end of last season saw them reboot into an entirely new universe, and b) the fact that God has gone silent is, in fact, a major plot point for the season. We don't have Her slyly telling us the story, or indeed anything, and everyone is left to make their own judgments and take their own actions. Which, obviously, gets them into a lot of trouble, especially when Metatron (the Voice of God, aka someone acting in the belief that they're speaking for God and therefore doing terrible harm) swoops in with the ultimate buzzkill at the end of episode 6. But we'll get to that.

The downside was that the main, present-day plot (hiding Gabriel in the bookshop and trying to get Nina and Maggie to fall in love) was fairly thin, felt stretched out and at times weirdly paced, and otherwise existed mostly to get us to That Ending and the setup for season 3. But the ending was so damn good (if obviously, very painful) that I can't be TOO mad, not least because we spent six episodes with them just making absolutely no pretense about the whole thing being as incredibly homosexual as possible. I'll be honest: I did not think they were going to actually, explicitly go there. Neil Gaiman has been so consistent about "your interpretations are valid and you're welcome to read it however you want, but the only canon is what's on screen," which I think is frankly a good thing (not least since the Neil GAYman Cinematic Universe is consistently very, very good to us queers), that I just... didn't quite think they'd pull the trigger. Sir Terry is dead and can't have active input, this is based on a book published 30 years ago, maybe they didn't want to make it LIKE THAT... etc. I certainly hoped, but I didn't really think they would.

Uh. Well.

As I said in my various semi-coherent liveblog posts, I honestly don't think there was a single straight person in the entire season, among both major and background characters. Aziraphale/Crowley and Maggie/Nina are the obvious paralleling couples, but Beelzebub (using "they" pronouns and addressed as "Lord" despite presenting as femme/femme-adjacent) is clearly nonbinary and therefore also queer, and the countless gay/queer side characters were just /chefs kiss. From Job's son making a sassy pass at Aziraphale, to the random Scottish goon with Grindr on his phone (which he then gives to Aziraphale, because what is subtlety), to the interracial couple with the trans spouse at the Pride and Prejudice ball, there was just a lot of casual, unremarked, non-story-critical queer representation visible at every turn. It's like the NGCU saw the bigots wailing about Sandman season 1 being extremely gay and went CHALLENGE ACCEPTED, LET'S MAKE GOOD OMENS 2 EVEN MORE GAY.

God bless.

Obviously, Jon Hamm as Amnesia!Gabriel stole the show (he was SO fucking funny) and it was also incredibly fun to watch Miranda Richardson repurposed as a scheming demon. Nina Sosanya also reappeared as Nina the coffee shop owner, which leads us into the Maggie-and-Nina subplot. They're obviously, wildly, incredibly clearly an analogue for Aziraphale and Crowley themselves, but they're also each, crucially, a mix of both. On the surface, Maggie is Aziraphale: the plump, blonde, earnest, sweet-natured one owning a slightly dated book music shop and somewhat clueless about emotional nuances, while Nina is (also on the surface) Crowley, the hard-edged dark loner who doesn't want to open herself up to people or be spotted caring. But emotionally, Maggie is Crowley: the one openly pining, clearly besotted, only wanting to hang around their crush and do whatever they can to make themselves useful, while Nina is Aziraphale. Interested but reticent, attracted but conflicted, trapped in an abusive relationship with a demanding offscreen "lover" (Lindsay/Heaven) who tries to constantly control and shame them without ever offering much, if anything in return. By the end, they bring themselves around to what Maggie/Crowley are offering, but by then, well. We've got a lot more problems on our hands.

As I also said in my earlier posts, this entire thing has always been a metaphor for religion, queerness, and what religion -- especially abusive, fundamentalist, organized religion -- does to queer people, but they really cranked the FUCK out of that metaphor this season. Aziraphale is guilt-tripped, controlled, and shamed for his attraction to Crowley at every turn. He is torn between his imagined duty to Heaven, in all its ignorant, uncaring, bureaucratic, gratuitously cruel system that he still insists on seeing the best in because he can't bear the alternative, and the chaotic and sometimes grey but genuinely more good morality that Crowley offers him. (Can I just say, we were explicitly shown that the two of them together doing "just a little miracle" are more powerful than Heaven AND Hell combined.) And at the end, he's told that the only way he can be with Crowley -- what Metatron explicitly blackmails him with -- is if they both go back to heaven, submit themselves to the cruel system again and give up everything that has made them who they are: their home in London, their human friends, their reliance on each other, their independence, their own ways of doing things. You can be queer in this (religious) framework, but only the limited, watered-down, controlled, controllable, constantly-under-supervision kind of queer, which relies on both you and your lover "converting" back to the true faith. And if you don't cooperate, they will literally kidnap you, lie to you, manipulate you, take you from your soulmate, and force you right back into doing the one thing (destroying the world) that you never, ever wanted to do in the first place, because in their minds, that is still better than this. It's for your own good.

Ouch.

And the thing is: that's why the ending a) hits so hard and b) is so fucking painful, because of course Aziraphale agrees. He has no conception of being able to defy Heaven on his own; he has always, always needed Crowley for that. In the flashbacks, when Aziraphale is faced with an order from Heaven that he desperately does not want to carry out (such as letting all Job's children get killed), he still relies completely on Crowley to "outsmart the rules" and find a better way. Crowley is A Crafty Demon; that's what he does, and so Aziraphale rationalizes it to himself that therefore that must be fine. Even in season 1, when he really didn't want the Apocalypse to happen but initially thought it was his duty as a good Heaven footsoldier, he relied on Crowley to talk him out of it and allow him to do what he really wants instead. That's their whole dynamic in a nutshell, as exemplified in that scene in episode 2, where Crowley tempts Aziraphale with the "pleasures of the flesh" while sprawled on his back in Ravish Me mode like the giant walking gay disaster that he is. (Sorry, buddy. That beard. Can't do it.) Everything that Aziraphale's existence is, that makes him who he is, that he loves and cherishes the most (in this case, food and wine) comes from Crowley. Everything else is just background noise.

Throughout the season, what we see is Aziraphale increasingly coming around to the fantasy of being with Crowley. He's coy and flirty; he talks about "our car" and expects Crowley will let him (which he does); he wants to have a Jane Austen ball and for them to dance together (oh my heart); he even thinks, at the crucial moment, that the best way for them to be together is to go back to heaven just like they were in the beginning, once more perfect angels, as if those entire six thousand years of struggle and grief and pining and separation and falling didn't happen. And Crowley -- poor, poor, brave, devoted, heartbroken Crowley -- has just heard for the first time in said six thousand years that actually telling the person you love how you feel is an option. Maggie and Nina tell them point-blank that their whole stupid plan failed because people aren't chess pieces who can be moved and automatically achieve the desired result. And of course this gobsmacks the dearest and dumbest Ineffable Husbands, because they can't conceive of anything else. People are chess pieces in the Great War of Heaven and Hell; Aziraphale and Crowley themselves are chess pieces who have been desperately trying to get out of being moved by external forces, but that doesn't change the fact that that's what they are. They don't have volition or agency aside from that which they can sneak for themselves in brief and stolen moments. That's it.

Until, well. It's not it. They discover that this whole would-be war is actually an elaborate ruse to cover up another angel-demon romance, that of Gabriel and Beelzebub. (I'll be honest, I'm 99% sure they did this storyline because they saw the fans crackshipping them, but I appreciate a fictional narrative that values and incorporates its fans' input, rather than trying to constantly "trick" or "outsmart" them or "do what they don't expect.") And Gabriel and Beelzebub get to be together, but only by leaving their world forever. They have to desert their homes, their structures, even their own identities, and never return. And Crowley and Aziraphale are so rooted in their "precious, perfect, fragile" life in their little corner of Soho, with their bookshop and their Bentley and their dining at the Ritz (which they didn't get to do in the end because METATRON /shakes fist), that that just doesn't work. Neither of them can conceive of doing that. So Aziraphale thinks "go back to heaven and try to make the terrible system do some good and take what we can in terms of being together" and Crowley just... pours out his heart. He's ready to fucking propose. He barely stops himself from saying something to the effect of "I want to spend eternity with you." He begs, he pleads with Aziraphale to go away not in the literal sense, but the emotional/metaphysical: to finally break this toxic dependence on Heaven and tell them once and for all where to stick it. And because he is desperate to make Aziraphale understand, he finally throws all caution to the winds and recklessly, desperately, adoringly kisses him, the one thing he's wanted to do for ages and...

Gets. Shot. Down.

Ugghhhhh. I'm suffering all over again. Aziraphale wants him, hungers for it, for them, and yet he's been so abused and so conditioned by Heaven (he's still blithely repeating to Crowley's face that "Hell are the bad guys!") that he just cannot accept that kind of desperate, blind, limitless, lawless affection. He even forgives Crowley for this "transgression," just to really twist the knife, and Crowley just can't take it, can't face up to how terribly this has all gone up in flames, after he went to heaven trying to find the answer for Gabriel's situation. Gabriel, who he fucking hates. Gabriel, who tried to kill the angelic being he loves (and for which Crowley has transparently never forgiven him). And yet at one pouty puppy-eyed look from Aziraphale and a warning that whoever is harboring Gabriel might be in danger, Crowley leaps headlong into the Bentley again and rushes to the rescue while "Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy" is blaring. He stoutly protects Gabriel; he does a miracle to disguise him; he lets him have hot chocolate and stay in the bookshop; he guards him from the literal demonic horde outside. All because of Aziraphale. That's it. And then, it still doesn't work. Not only that, Gabriel's absence and decision to forego Armageddon gives Heaven the one tool they finally need to take Aziraphale away from him.

I repeat: Ugghhhhhhhh.

(In a good way. Ngl, I love this angst. This is the kind of angst my brain Thrives on, the Thematic Parallel Romantic Character Arc kind. Nom nom nom. But also: AGONY.)

I also need to talk about Aziraphale driving the Bentley, aside from the obvious metaphor of him being in Crowley's home while Crowley is in his. Last season, we had the "you go too fast for me, Crowley" scene with them sitting in said Bentley, which was Aziraphale saying he's not ready for a relationship. In this season, as noted above, we see Aziraphale increasingly embracing the potential fantasy of being with Crowley. But here's the catch: when he's in the Bentley this time, driving it, setting the pace, acclimating to the idea, he's driving his own idea of what the Bentley/his relationship with Crowley is. It's not the real thing. He plays classical music; he supplies himself sweets; he turns it yellow; he drives too slow. Crowley calls him in another old-married-couple snitfit to complain that Aziraphale's messed it up, but what Aziraphale has actually messed up (or will, by the end of the season) is far more consequential than just a car. He's changed the entire shape of their relationship to the one he thinks can make it work, and it just doesn't. It has to be them -- "we could have been... Us" -- or it's not even close to the truth. It's not worth their time.

I repeat: Ouch.

Speaking of the writers validating fan theories, I know we all picked up and screamed about on Crowley's idea of Peak Romance Guaranteed To Fall In Love being sheltering from rain and gazing into each other's eyes, which confirms that that poor bastard was indeed ass-over-teakettle gone as soon as he met Aziraphale (again) in Eden. I also need to talk about the 1941 redux, because wow. This time, the danger comes from Hell, which we see being its usual self: gleefully, pointlessly cruel, pettily backbiting, dirty, sniping, tedious, endless, determined to mindlessly destroy because They're The Bad Guys and they like it. So they blackmail, spy on, miracle-block, illicitly photograph, and try to prove that Aziraphale and Crowley are secretly a couple, right after Aziraphale himself has just had the Light From Heaven realization that he's in love (which we all also picked up on in s1). They're forcibly outing them (to speak of more Religious Queer Trauma) in order to break them up/get them into trouble with their authorities/families. Aziraphale and Crowley manage to escape it mostly by dumb luck, but Crowley having an altogether freakout, hands shaking, barely able to actually point the gun at Aziraphale even in the knowledge that it's supposed to be fake, is just... wow. He can't even fathom the idea of ever trying to destroy him in earnest, especially when he knows on some level that Aziraphale also finally just realized his own feelings. So I just need to --

/screams

Anyway, Aziraphale's entire arc this season is doing what he thinks is the right thing and then inadvertently causing harm and damage as a result. In the Edinburgh flashbacks (live slug reaction of me: SEAN BIGGERSTAFF???!!) he tries to stop Elspeth from stealing bodies and gets Morag killed and Crowley drinking the laudanum to save him (though that part with David Tennant just riffing left and right, using his natural Scottish accent, and being Tiny Crowley/Huge Crowley was hilarious). He invites his neighbors to a Pride and Prejudice ball and makes them all the target for demonic attack. And of course the Job episode: Aziraphale, horrified at Heaven's callous cruelty, desperate not to get Job's children killed, willing to go along with Crowley's tricks to save them somehow, tempted by Crowley to do the fucknasty with their angel bits eat some food and decide that he likes it. As mentioned, the whole thing about God being silent this season is a major thematic choice. The only time we see/hear God is Her communing with Job from afar. Aziraphale enviously imagines the answers he must be getting (he's not, he's baffled and perplexed), while Crowley longs beyond words to even have the opportunity to ask the question: why? Why do this? Why is this your plan?

And of course, this absence culminates in the Metatron, the Voice of God, the person arrogantly claiming that they're speaking for God and know exactly what Heaven wants, being able to seize Aziraphale by the short hairs and absolutely fuck him over. Gabriel is gone/decommissioned/eloping with Beelzebub, so Heaven needs a Supreme Leader (God apparently is no longer a factor in the equation). And what this Supreme Leader needs to do is finally unleash the Apocalypse that Gabriel decided to pass on (the Second Coming). Aziraphale needs to be punished, taken away from Crowley's influence/love, and put back under Heaven's explicit control, so Metatron spots a great opportunity to do all three at once. It's not an accident that the exact tool he uses to get Aziraphale to agree is "now you can actually be with Crowley!" Aziraphale and Crowley have been trying so hard to hide out from their respective Head Offices, but now all at once, there's this seemingly miraculous opportunity for them not to have to do that anymore! They can be together! They can be sanctioned by Heaven! They can give up all this hiding and sneaking around and lying! Isn't that better?

... As long as, of course, they give up absolutely everything that makes them who they are. No big deal. Minor catch. Probably nothing.

Metatron doesn't let Aziraphale have time to escape, or think it over, or reflect, or anything. He pressures Aziraphale to come with him immediately, or be once more subject to Heaven's implicit wrath/destruction/judgment. Believe me, Aziraphale already KNOWS he's made a huge mistake, as soon as he hears what Metatron really wants: bringing him back to unleash the Apocalypse that Aziraphale and Crowley have given up literally everything to prevent. He doesn't need time to reflect. By the time my man is in that elevator, he's well aware of what a catastrophic misjudgment he's made, and yet --

Aziraphale needs this. He has, as noted, literally always relied on Crowley outsmarting Heaven's cruel orders in order to prevent himself from having to do them. He's relied on Crowley rescuing him ("rescuing me makes him so happy," WELL BUB, IT'S BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS NEED IT). He admits to Crowley's face that "I need you!" He hates Heaven's sadistic meanness, but he has absolutely no framework, in and of himself, to defy it. When the rubber hits the road, he will crumple and try to go along with it, and now he's been put in a position where he's going to have to stand up, defy Heaven, and make the break once and for all BY HIMSELF. He doesn't have Crowley around to do it for him, he has no support, he is going to arrive in Heaven and be shuttled straight off to the Apocalypse 2.0 War Room. The only way he gets out of this is if he actively stands up, if he chooses himself and Crowley and their life, and he has to.

The thing is:

Aziraphale has lived his entire eternal existence Looking Up. Up is the direction of Goodness and Heaven. Up is where Angels go. Up is where Aziraphale comes from and where Demons and Hell are not. But now he's going Up, in a position to take over the whole shebang, and it's the last thing he wants.

So he's going to have to come back Down.

He's going to have to Fall. He's going to have to get back Below at all costs. He's going to have to finally, once and for all, understand what led Crowley to make the choice to leave Heaven and never come back. It's only then that they can possibly be together on any kind of conscious, equal, deliberate footing, claim their own agency, reject Heaven AND Hell, and try to really earn that South Downs cottage and that happy-ever-after, and it's gonna hurt so good.

Now if you will excuse me, /screams

[writing-for-life]

The Sandman Overture and Exiles: Omnia Mutantur, Nihil Interit

Everything Changes, Nothing Is Truly Lost—Not Even Hope

There once was a little girl (well, not a human girl) known by the name Hope Beautiful Lost Nebula, egg-daughter of Clearly who died in childbirth, sperm-daughter of Troubling World who was murdered by reavers. She is one of the most meaningful characters of the whole Sandman, so why does fandom hardly talk about her, not even those who have read the comics?

Understanding Hope, her story and her connection to Dream, is more or less understanding the entirety of The Sandman, and that's why I want to write about Hope and hope.

This contains major spoilers for Overture, Exiles and the ending of the Sandman, so if you’d rather not, this is your exit sign…

Pictures often speak louder than words, so I would like to start with these [I will add Alt text gradually, it’s a lot]…

If you haven't read Overture, you would not know that the words Dream speaks in Hell when he wins the Oldest Game are a direct mirror of Hope's words, down to repeating "I am...". It is not a sudden epiphany about how to win—it is a memory.

How much Morpheus truly remembers about the universe before the reset in Overture—it is something we cannot know for certain, and we have discussed it on here many, many times. I personally lean towards his remembering a lot more than we might think, and I've written about it in other metas before, e.g. here (super long with many tangents) or here. The narration is unreliable on this, because Desire in cat-form says in Overture that “there won’t be anything to remember”, but also that Dream will be “the only one to remember”. But whether he remembers every detail, or whether it is exactly the way Glory states in the above panel and it’s just that Hope's name is there for him when he needs it most, is secondary. What matters is that he does remember (side-note: It also matters because Dream promised her himself. And he never goes back on a promise, for better, for worse).

The above conversation with Glory is often taken as proof that there is no hope in the new universe, and by extension, the whole of the Sandman turns into a story with a hopeless ending. But in my opinion, that isn’t true. Yes, as a mortal being, Hope does not exist in the universe we are now in. But two very specific panels in Overture are directly contradicted by what happens in the later arcs of The Sandman:

The Star says here, after Hope's above statement that she is not nothing, that she is Hope, "As if saying that might ever change something." [And the Star’s tone is equally mocking than that of Lucifer Morningstar when they say, “What are you then, Dream Lord?”, but that just as an aside.]

And since Hope is killed in the very next panel (because Time pulled Dream out of that situation, so he wasn't able to protect her anymore. Who needs parents, right?), we might be inclined to believe this.

But by now, we all know that the Star is WRONG. These are not "three words that mean nothing." Once again:

And also this (I couldn’t find a gif with the bit where she says, “I will never give up hope,” but we all know she does say these words):

What else makes Dream/s prevail in Hell, what else are the dreams Morpheus speaks about here than hopes?

The Star is directly proven wrong. And so are we if we assume that Hope’s spirit doesn’t exist anymore. Because hope as a concept, hope as the thing that Morpheus remembers when he fights Lucifer/Choronzon in Hell, still exists. Even though this was said in the old universe before the reset, it DOES mean something. It DOES change something. Because Morpheus remembers.

Remembering Hope means to have hope.

And if we believe there isn’t any H/hope, we are also directly proven wrong by Time, who tells us that there will always be a universe in which Hope (the being) exists, and that there will always be one in which she doesn’t. And they, in a way, exist simultaneously. So even in a universe without Hope, her spirit, her memory, prevails. That is not a universe entirely without hope.

And that is also our tie-in to Exiles, because Morpheus and Daniel also exist simultaneously. Omnia mutantur, nihil interit—everything changes, nothing is truly lost.

Morpheus has moved on, but he still exists—in story, in memory of those who cared about him, in Daniel!Dream, in the “Soft Places” at the fray where reality and dreams meet. And it is exactly what H/hope is in the Sandman universe—it keeps on existing: In stories, in memories, in the “soft places”. Because to hope means to love, and to love means to hope.

Sometimes, you need to find hope…

Sometimes, she needs a bit of coaxing. Sometimes, hope means not to forget, so you keep going and remember what truly matters…

Sometimes, we lose her, and even Hope loses memory of who she was, but we can be reminded…

Hope might transform, but she never truly disappears in The Sandman.

On that note: I totally understand the attachment to Morpheus as a character. He is my favourite character, too. I cried buckets when I first knew what was going to happen (decades ago I dare say, and not at the end of The Kindly Ones, but during World’s End). And I think it is totally legitimate to want him to survive. Part of me does, too. It is a bit baffling to assume that people who read the story with acceptance and find meaning in it don’t care enough about Morpheus as a character to want him to survive, and that they are even a bit stupid for thinking The Sandman’s underlying message is one of hope. I don’t know many people who aren’t heartbroken in one way or another. But the story had to end the way it ended because it is not just about Morpheus and humanising him.

I often feel that by clinging to his character and person alone, we are losing sight of the deeper meaning, and we are closing our eyes to all the messages that are there, in plain sight, if we just let them speak to us:

The Sandman is not simply a story about Morpheus. He is the protagonist (even that could be argued), but he is also a vessel for the meaning and power of change, for letting go instead of clinging to what doesn’t serve us (and isn’t it ironic that by desperately wanting him to live and getting upset about the fact he doesn’t, we are doing exactly that instead of leaning into catharsis that actually has the potential to bring on change in us?).

Dream does not die because Dream cannot die. He changes. What dies is a point of view (symbolised by Morpheus). That’s it. That is the message. Omnia mutantur, nihil interit.

Hope is not gone. Not in this universe or in any other. Her spirit prevails. Because when she calls you out, when she touches you, you remember what matters:

“I’m not,” he says after thinking for a hot second, and proceeds to do exactly that regardless.

She touches him, she holds his hand, and calls him out.

She touches him, she holds his hand, and he is honest with himself, for once.

Hope touched Dream, but did she touch Desire in the same way? I already wrote about it here, and I think in certain ways, she did:

Hope prevails…

Hope is what saved the universe in the first place.

Hope is what Morpheus remembers when it matters.

Hope is what Nada finds again in A Hope in Hell after she gave up hope in Tales in the Sand.

Hope is what drives Unity and ultimately lets Rose survive.

Hope springs eternal in people like Rosemary who are willing to help and overcome their own fears. And in the TV series, that hope gets rewarded, and that’s important (I am glad they made that change).

Hope is even what drives Morpheus, but to see that, we need to take our eyes off only focusing on his having hope for himself, his having hope for his point of view (that does not serve him or anyone else, and he knows). If that’s the hope we’re looking for, we won’t find it. No, that’s not entirely true either. Because again, Dream can’t die. But the true reason is:

Morpheus is bigger than that. The story is bigger than that.

He has hope for humanity and sentient beings that are under his purview—what else are dreams but hopes? And Morpheus as the “point of view” understands that said point of view needs to make space for a better, kinder, more human (for lack of better term—human=/=man but human=with humanity) Dream to exist. And said Dream comes into existence with Daniel, but he also still contains all that was Morpheus. See it as having learned from experience and moving on with a new point of view instead of letting our hurt define us and holding on to it indefinitely. It is something we recommend in real life all the time—why can’t we find it in this story? Because it is right there, again, in plain sight: Omnia mutantur, nihil interit.

I am not saying this is how you have to see it. But I am saying that engaging with the story on this level makes it easier to come to terms with an ending that is commonly interpreted as hopeless because we can't see the forest for the trees.

Hope is hope. And she saved the universe and us. Not just once, but many times over. The new universe isn’t the hopeless, sad universe. The old one was. The new one has hope because it keeps existing. With Hope’s spirit and a Dream who has changed…

[avelera]

Struck between the eyes today by the Random Sandman Twitter account that posted this image from the comics and what it means for Retired Dream AU:

So if we go with the headcanon (/ fact??) that all the Major Arcana represent some deeply buried fear or desire of Dream, specifically (because the Dreaming is him but at least in theory his greatest creations should be even more reflective of him than the average?) then we could in theory take Gilbert's words as reflecting Dream's desires as well.

We could read all of Dream's interactions with the Major Arcana as, on some level, being interactions with himself, Dream talking to himself in the mirror, or at least the strongest external parts of himself, the largest fragments so to speak. So Gilbert/Fiddler's Green is called the heart of the Dreaming here.

And Dream's heart then is tired. His heart is curious. Specifically, his heart is curious to experience the little victories and tiny defeats of human life. And, his heart longs to spare Rose, which we know Dream wants to do as well, another point in favor of the possibility that Gilbert's words are literally Dream's heart speaking right now.

And, because I am Dreamling shipper trash and it all circles back to that, I can't help but think of who we have seen in the Waking who is most familiar, perhaps of anyone in the world, with the little victories and defeats of human life and who would love to share those with Dream (spoilers, it's Hob).

(Dream, the votes from 2 out of 3 of your MAJOR ARCANA are in, they want to be human enough for your own heart (Gilbert) to FLEE you and for arguably the personification of your darker desires (Corinthian) to IMPRISON you and risk being unmade to live as a human, and the third one wants so badly to stop being a nightmare so she can make dreamers happy that she also risked being unmade. Dream, my man, I think your subconscious is trying to tell you something. Why are you only the Dreaming when it means you're supposed to be miserable but not when the entire Dreaming is telling you that you want to be human so badly you'd risk death to do it??)