#maybe i will be again maybe i won't i dunno what my brains doing but the music scratches some kind of brain itch

[moonsidesong]

have failed miserably at objectober as. expected . but uh today i went to go get poki bowls with my family and then i downloaded a lot of puyo music . so i win today

[transmasc-tabris]

More screenshots (bonus, managed to find Bull a shirt and don't know how to feel about that)

[keeps-ache]

i should learn to make hash browns

[ddejavvu]

I love your best friend with no boundaries James, and I was wondering if you could do one where James and reader are having their regularly scheduled mid-day naps, and Sirius and Remus walk into the dorm to find James just humping reader while they’re asleep? Maybe James and reader wake up to the GASP of horror from Sirius after his not so innocent eyes witness “straight up porn in their shared dorm where Peter of all people could witness”

I love all your works and was wondering if I could be marked as 😻anon? I’m the person who requested the bsf Steve imagine and I’m 100% gonna request something again because you’re perfect and I just wanna kiss you on the mouth🫶🏻🫶🏻

this post is 18+, minors dni.

Sirius considers himself James's best friend- no, brother, but he's not afraid to whack the man upside the head when he finds James grinding on you in his sleep.

"You-! Nasty-! Fucker-!" He bullies James awake, appreciating the much calmer, kinder way that Remus rouses you, tugging you away from James on the bed and murmuring that your nap is over. You blink your eyes open serenely, and James's shoot wide in pain as Sirius assaults him.

"What the fuck? Agh- Sirius! I know you're mad that I've got the better potions grade, but killing me won't help!"

"This isn't about potions, Potter," Sirius scoffs, "But I am thinking about tossing you in a hot cauldron. You were- eeugh, you were humping her, you animal!"

Your brows are furrowed and your blinks are bleary, but your brain catches up with the help of Remus's hands where they trace soothing circles on your back.

"Oh," You mumble groggily, as James groans with quickly reddening cheeks, "Uh- s'alright, Jamie."

Remus's hand stills on your back, but James and Sirius join in a fused indignant-confused "What?"

"S'just natural I guess," You shrug, "I dunno, I haven't- er, got one. But it was an accident, Jamie, you were asleep. It's alright."

James’s cheeks are still plenty rouged, but he nods sleepily at your forgiveness, relieved that he's not being hit by two people instead of only one.

"Yeah, thanks bird," He flops back down onto the mattress, letting out a sigh heavily infused with relief, "Wouldn't do it on purpose, y'know. Not while you're sleeping, that's- that's pervy."

"Some people like pervy," You hum, settling back into your own position in James's bed, though he's no longer curled around you. Sirius watches as you knock your hand against his own, "Sirius thinks I'm a perv."

"You're both pervs," Sirius grimaces, his lip curled in distaste as Remus stands from James's bedside, "Seriously, he eats off of your spoons, you've seen his dick, he's been grinding all over your ass - if you don't get a marriage license soon you're going to be very unpopular with the traditional crowd."

James turns towards you with a gasp, his eyes shining just the same as his grin does, "We could get married!"

"We should," You laugh, "And we could get a flat, and we could have your mother over for dinner every Tuesday."

"That would work." He nods, fully settled back into the pillows from Sirius's disturbance, "She loves you. And she's free Tuesday nights - her knitting circle ends at three."

"I know that," You scoff, barely biting back an overexaggerated eye roll, "James, I write your mother once a week. I know when her knitting circle is."

"You write my mum?" He rears back, momentarily confused, "She's never told me that!"

"Of course she hasn't," You snicker, "Because if you'd known, you would have stopped me from telling her how many times you get detention every week, and you'd want to share the sweets she sends me in exchange for the intel."

[ribbonbite]

mulgogi [sebastian solace]

in which a certain prisoner is a kpop stan and sebastian hates(loves) it

a/n ♡ this isn't meant to be taken seriously (and is lowkey cringe) so to the people who hate fun THIS ISN'T FOR YOU!! also it's kinda short im sorry <3 also badly written but erm ^_^'' and to non kpop fans who like sebastian too, this probably won't make much sense im sorry 😭

(this is NOT an excuse to mix my hyperfixations and it is NOT cringe. it is also NOT a reflection of my headcanon of sebastian being a secret kpop stan who likes girl groups. /s)

name inspo: '"mulgogi" by fromis_9 (get it bc sebastian is a fish and mulgogi means fish HAHA!!)

God, Sebastian fucking hated them.

Not only were they super annoying to him, flashing their beacon at his face and whatnot, they were a kpop fan. Whenever they came into the shop they always blasted music that pissed him off. 'I dunno, Sebastian! Maybe you should stan fromis_9', they would say with a stupid grin on their face.

Why were they so joyous too? They were in a facility where almost everything is out to get them. It's like their brain was only full of puppies and kittens or something, even though they're experiencing the horrors of humanity.

Sebastian started biting his finger in irritation at the thought of them. Oh how he wanted to so badly punch them in their stupid yet cute face. As he got lost into his violent (and somehow sweet) thoughts, he suddenly heard noises coming from the vent.

Oh god... not them again...

"Guuueeessss who!" [Name] announces with the most bright tone of voice Sebastian has ever heard in his life. He instantly became nauseous as they walked into the shop.

"Oh... It's you." Sebastian says through gritted teeth, clapping his palms together. "I sure am glad you're back!" The sarcasm of the grumpy fish went over the head of the prisoner.

A grin made its way onto [Name]'s face. "Anyway, you know what time it is!" They exclaim before pulling out a speaker. Where did they even manage to get it? How is it even working in whatever hellhole they're in? Who knows.

With a press of the power button, the familiar tune of a specific song that [Name] liked playing started. The happy and summery tone did NOT match the current situation they were in.

"Have you seen my Hayoung photocard? I carry this around with me all the time!" They said, pointing a piece of paper with a random lady on it at Sebastians face

The fish looked at the paper with lowered brows, not amused at whatever the prisoner was doing. "...You're very annoying." He mutters as [Name] put the photocard back inside their bag. He hated the fact that he found it kind of endearing.

"Aww, but I know you like it!" [Name] teases. "Your tail is literally swaying to the beat of this song right now!" They pointed at his lower end, which was indeed moving despite Sebastians irritated face. He took a deep breath before crossing his arms. "Yea yea... the song is good." He admitted with defeat.

[Name] grinned and started jamming along. Maybe this was a weird way of coping with the fact that there are entities who could end their life at any moment, Sebastian thought.

Whatever the reason was, he was glad that they had some sort of light in their dark situation. He still found them irritating but hey, at least he has company, right? And he found [Name] sort of cute so he didn't completely despise them.

"Sebastian, I think you should really stan fromis_9." Their voice shook Sebastian out of thought. He looked at them for a moment, a deep sigh leaving his mouth.

"Sure! Why not."

if u can, please stream fromis_9's comeback "supersonic"! out august 12th <3

ending was a bit choppy and weird im sorry >_<

thanks for reading!! 🩷

[wanderingblindly]

i can only agree with the other anon, your prompt fills are giving me LIFE <3 and if you have the time, could we maybe get a landoscar + 22 or 31 pls? have a lovely evening!

YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD GET RID OF ME!!! YOU REALLY THOUGHT!! UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOUR ALL I CAN'T WORK ON ANY OF MY WIPS BECAUSE MY BRAIN IS IN HELL!!! anyways here's landoscar for "a kiss after a small rejection", looooooosely inspired by Hungary 2024! prompt list here :))

What Can I Say?

The lift is deathly silent, almost like it's frozen. If he couldn't feel it moving under his feet, if he wasn't intently watching the numbers tick upwards towards their end, he would think it was the universe punishing him further – giving him more chances to fail at biting his tongue.

Oscar's standing next to him so stilly that, similarly, Lando wonders if he's turned to stone.

He doesn't even know what to say to him. Clearly he's meant to say something if Oscar chose to sneak into the same lift, if he waited in hospitality for so long that the bulk of the crowd had died down.

The lift ticks by the fifth floor.

He's meant to say congratulations, probably. Definitely. He's definitely meant to say congratulations, meant to drown out the caustic words building on the back of his tongue. It's not that he doesn't want to, but it's hard. Not because it came at the expense of Lando's win – he can get his own wins, those not handed to him by strategy and team orders. But it's the fact that it came after his own public lambasting, a public verbal crucifixion as the team drove nail after nail into his bleeding wrists.

How is he meant to say congratulations when it was written in his own blood?

Oscar doesn't even know that it was, not really. He didn't hear each strike of the hammer unto iron, like it's some tightly kept secret between Lando, the team, and every single fan. But not Oscar.

It hangs in the stagnant air between them: a secret the other doesn't know exists and the looming feeling that they'd both simultaneously played the villain and the victim.

They pass the tenth.

"You could come to mine," Oscar finally mumbles, voice so quiet that Lando nearly misses it. It's not quite an invitation, definitely not a question. Certainly it's not a declaration of want, of desire. It's something more fragile than that.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea," Lando says; from the corner of his eye, he sees Oscar move – leaning against the wall like speaking took it out of him.

"Oh."

"It's not…" Lando trails off, finally giving up with a sigh; he joins Oscar against the wall, both of them still staring at the ticking numbers. It's a countdown to something.

"A good idea." Oscar repeats for him, tone harsh in it's neutrality.

"What do you really want?"

Oscar crosses his ankles. He uncrosses his ankles. "I dunno, just to like…" He rubs his hand across his face, the way that makes his delicate skin turn pink. "Go back to normal."

Part of Lando's glad that it's not just him, that he isn't alone in the feeling that the air has gone too thin.

"It will," He says, finally turning to look at Oscar – his eyes are a little red, blinking like he's trying to keep more unsavory emotions at bay. "But not right now."

"I won't apologize," Oscar answers, though Lando never asked. He never asked because he never expected it, because he – honestly – never needed it. He doesn't need Oscar's apology just like he doesn't need Oscar's forgiveness, because, at the end of the day, they knew this was a risk.

And it was a risk they took, last year in in Singapore.

"Me neither." Lando says.

The lift hits fifteen. Lando's on twenty, Oscar somewhere above.

"I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?" Lando continues, standing back up and straightening out his polo. Oscar follows him like a shadow, hands shoved in his pockets.

"We'll be ok." He, again, answers something Lando hadn't asked – something Lando knows.

"I know," Lando agrees, voice soft. Before the doors can open, pulling them apart to go ask what ifs into the dark of their hotel rooms, Lando leans towards Oscar. "Soon." Gently, so gentle it may as well have never happened, Lando presses his lips to Oscar's – as if sealing a promise, a deal.

Oscar doesn't move, just takes what Lando gives him and offers lightly closed eyes in return – as if he wishes it could be more.

They separate just before the door opens.

Lando leaves without a goodnight.

[suzukiblu]

comfort w tim please? (i just want some fluff dkjshekdb 😂)

Well, this excerpt isn't Tim comfort, but hopefully counts for Tim fluff?

Context: pre-identity reveal/identity porn/idiots to lovers TimKon.

"Sounds like supervillain talk, dude," Kon says. Tim resolves to dial back on that at this point in his career. He's laying groundwork, yes, but subtlety is still the wiser course of action.

"You say that like you've never socialized with a supervillain before," he says dryly.

"Well, usually ones who wear a bit less," Kon replies, grinning wickedly at him.

"So you're telling me I should invest in a crop top before I try to take over the world and remake it in my own image?" Tim asks still more dryly as he raises an eyebrow at him with a little smirk, and Kon laughs and steps in a little closer, giving him a not very subtle up-and-down with his eyes.

"Only if you're trying to recruit me for your evil plans," he says, grin turning sharp. Tim wants to lick his teeth. "So I dunno, what are your feelings on Daisy Dukes?"

"I'm going to be honest, I'm not actually that much of an exhibitionist so at this point we're just describing my ideal costume updates for you," Tim informs him.

"Oh yeah?" Kon asks with another laugh even as he visibly preens at the suggestion. Tim is all for that, personally. Both the preening and the theoretical updates, in fact. And, a little more weirdly, just the idea of having anything to do with what Kon might ever decide to wear.

Yeah, that's probably a later thought, Tim decides. Like, a private-time kind of later thought.

"You're solar-powered, aren't you?" he says reasonably. "Showing a bit more skin can't hurt."

"I wonder if Superman would buy that excuse," Kon says musingly.

"Power Girl exists," Tim says still more reasonably. "And Supergirl wears a miniskirt, last I checked."

"Valid," Kon says, putting on a mock-thoughtful expression and tapping the side of his jaw. "Maybe I'll put in some cutouts and go for a lower neckline, tell the big guy he's making the rest of us look like prudes. What do you think, bikini or high-cut bottoms?"

"I don't know the difference," Tim lies, desperately trying not to overheat and die at that question and every single accompanying mental image that his useless brain has so helpfully decided to supply. "You'll have to provide examples."

"Will I now," Kon says, grinning all over again and pointedly cocking a hip. "What, pretty boy, you want a fashion show?"

"Well I did want to be a photographer when I was a kid," Tim says, although it was definitely never that kind of photography he had in mind. Kon laughs again and shifts in even closer, though, so it's worth it. Tim is mortified, but also undeniably into just . . . all of this, really, just everything about this conversation. Robin can't flirt with Superboy, but, well . . .

He's taking advantage a little, he can admit, but it's still just . . . nice.

He's wanted to flirt with Kon for way too long, at this point. Indulging in a little bit of it isn't the worst thing he could do.

And again, it's Kon, so it's not like it's serious or anything. The guy won't even remember this conversation tomorrow, much less anything about Tim Drake.

. . . admittedly that'd be counterproductive to Tim's long-term goals here, but still. He's willing to take his time on this. There's a plan. It has steps. Layers. Processes.

"I like you, man," Kon says with a wider grin, which is in absolutely no way whatsoever in the plan. "You're funny."

It occurs to Tim, almost disbelievingly, that he might've . . . made a good impression on Kon? Somehow?

Well that's weird.

[softcryz]

I want to see crea as different species, lizard, scug, scav... Go silly

GO SILLY I DID!!

I've technically drawn him as a slugcat over a thousand times but I will take any excuse to do it again and again because. Well. It's fun.

I usually draw him with the antenna but if we're going true slugcat then we have to embrace his tiny ass ears and his tiny stub tail.

Just a really fucking big and strong slugcat. Whenever I draw him his markings change so who knows maybe that's just something that happens. Makes him throw up paint.

NOW.. ANYTHING BESIDES SLUGCAT IS A STRUGGLE. I kinda failed at making him look scavenger-like and I apologize.

Huge. Probably muscular. Probably has like a strap thingy so that he can have more items on his person.

I.. ALSO HAD A LOT OF TROUBLE HERE. It's so hard to make something feel like him without the shape of his antenna. He doesn't take inspiration off of a specific lizard in general, I just kinda threw stuff around. (But if I had to choose two, probably either caramel lizard or his Canvas Lizards)

He's got like weird rainbow ribbon-y frills. I dunno. His head would probably end up being the white of his antenna?? It's like the reverse of a normal lizard which is fun.

I would've done more (EX; ancient, human, ect) but my brain blocks me from what he would look like as those things (even though I desperately want to draw them) SO.. THIS IS ALL FOR NOW

Except for cat Creativity. Cat Creativity has existed for ages. BEFORE Creativity was even a concept. But I won't explain why that is

I had these weird little rambles from last night of me trying to decode what makes Creativity "Creativity" too? I failed but they exist and they're out in the world now

[morgysfics]

Kenneth Sean Carson x afab reader

Better than ice cream.

(Part II)

One shot smut.

After rumours spread online about Barbieland, you, a curious human, were hellbent on finding a way there, only for you to befriend Ken… and he has curiosities about the real outside world himself.

You glance over at the fireplace that was still barely lit under the plasma TV that hung above the mantel. The short yet fake flames brought some comfort to you; like this place had a warmth you couldn't put into words. A warmth you hadn't felt in your own world of reality in a long while.

"What're you thinkin' about, Y/N?" Ken asked, noticing your silence.

"This place… I know you know it has its differences to the outside world but…" you seemed to trail off a little, like you were trying to understand what you wanted to say. Your brows furrowed softly before you turned to Ken. He was looking at you, his bright blonde head tilted a little as if to try to read your facial expressions clearer – you did think it was cute every time he did that. Like a puppy.

"Well, I'm sure I don't know all the differences," Ken replied, his brows raising a little. "I mean– Okay, I may have got some stuff from your place a little mixed up, but that's cool now. We're good. This place, Barbieland, if I can't find my place here, then…"

"You're Ken," you spoke up again, your eyes dancing between his blue ones. "You can find your place wherever you want to. If you ever want to come back to the outside world, try one more time, I'd be glad to try to show you how it really is."

"You'd… You'd do that? Seriously? Thank you, Y/N," he seemed to cough a little, trying to man himself up somewhat. "Thanks."

You offered him a smile and a small laugh before going to turn away, Ken's voice perked your ears again.

"D'you think… maybe, you could tell me some now? If I ever decide I wanna go, I can," his blue eyes shifted away for a moment before he moved a little closer to you, his head doing that tilt thing again, "get it a bit more. I won't be so lost."

"Oh, wow," you muttered softly. "Right now? I… I dunno where to start."

"Do people still fall in love the same way they do here?"

You blink in surprise at his question. His first question. You knew you shouldn't have been shocked, it's Ken. He's gonna wanna know how to get a girl if he truly wanted to. But you knew that he didn't need that. …Even if you were feeling something towards him recently.

"There's a million ways to fall in love, Ken," you replied, your smile pulled back slightly. "Everyone here feels like it's an obligation a little, though. You don't have to fall in love to still feel something. To feel connected to another person."

"I can make friends real easily," Ken explained confidently, fixing the navy bandana on his head. "Obligation… So, it's kinda true then, you don't have to fall in love?"

"It's your life anywhere, Ken." You hummed softly before speaking up again, "Like I said, in the human world, we have… so many ways to feel and express." You pause for a moment, your brows raising when you realise where this conversation might lead. "You have your plastic… and we have– we have more than plastic."

Ken was quiet when you finished speaking, like he was trying to put your words together like puzzle pieces in his brain. When he glanced to his own hands, his brows furrowed before turning back to you. "Well, you humans have, like, blood and stuff."

You let out a small giggle, your hand covering your mouth when you did. Oh, he was charming. "Well, that is true! What I'm trying to say is… uh… Actually, I don't know." You brush off your words, trying to find something else but your mind was a little in the gutter. You shake your head, like you were trying to mop away the dirt.

"Ah, you don't know?! Come oooon, I was so listenin' to all that." Ken groaned a little, throwing his hand out in frustration slightly. "So, if you don't gotta fall in love, then, like… The feelin', those feelings you get when you do, how do you…"

"Replace them?"

Ken nodded.

"Hm," you hummed a little, bringing your hand to your chin as you leaned forward slightly, your elbow on your knees against your chest. "Lots of ways to fulfil that joyment. A career. Family… A hobby. Sex. Friends. Eating good food."

"That's a lot," Ken mumbled, his deep voice soft a little as he spoke. "So, all of that we can do here, besides the food thing and the… Wait, what was the other thing?"

Oh no.

"Uh," you mutter a little before clearing your throat. "Sex?"

"I heard that word a lot back in the outside world," Ken spoke up again. "Always kinda… thrown about everywhere so I couldn't get, like, a definition for it, y'know?"

"Yeah, well, uh…" you fumble your words a little, feeling your cheeks flush a small shade of pink as you try to find something to reply with. "It's how babies are made."

"Oh. …Wait, so, how?"

"I– I don't think I'm the right person for this conversation," you replied quickly, turning away from him as he looked to you.

"You're actin' real weird," Ken chuckled a little, his brows raising on his forehead. "What ya actin' all weird for?"

"K… Ken," you mustered up enough confidence to turn back to him, though, Ken's brows seemed to raise that little more when he realised the expression on your face. "You know the physical differences between people in Barbieland and people in my land, right?"

"Oh, like…" Ken chuckled before shaking his head. "I'm not like the other Kens if that's what you're talkin' about. I have all the bits."

You stare at him for a moment, confused but you feel your face flush even more, your eyes widening in surprise. Before you even could notice, your hands slapped on your face and turned away from him again. "That's not what I…!"

"That's what you meant, right? Y/N?" he asked, somehow his voice seemed somewhat naïve to what just came out of his mouth before. "What's that gotta do with the sex thing?"

Your hands then slowly dragged down your face a little, exposing your eyes as you looked from the fireplace to Ken. "You… don't know?"

Ken shook his head before giving you a "well, then tell me" look.

"Kenneth!" you groaned before shoving him a little. "You did not just say you have all the bits and not even know what that suggests!"

"Woah, woah, handsy! What's with the shovin'?!" Ken groaned before he noticed you were laughing to yourself, his lips stayed apart slightly after he stopped speaking; admiring your smile for a moment.

"You're lucky you're so charming, it's actually ridiculous," you laugh again, covering your mouth a little. "You should watch what you say about that stuff around humans. You'll give off the wrong idea."

"And what idea would that be?" he asked, almost an annoyed tone lingered in his voice like he wanted you to just lay it all out for him. "Don't go all quiet on me now."

You shook your head, still laughing a little before you sighed. I guess someone had to tell him. Guess it was gonna be you. "O– Okay, I'll say this once." You felt your hand rub the nape of your neck a little before bringing it back to your lap." The parts people don't have in Barbieland… In the outside world, people… um, smush them together. To make babies or…" Your eyes drift away from him a little, an almost smirk laying on your lips. "To just have fun."

"You put your genitals together to make babies."

"And just for fun."

Ken's pretty much perfect lips stayed parted for a moment, like he was trying to understand what you were saying. "Why would you do that for fun? Sounds uncomfortable."

You tried to hide the ever growing playful expression on your face but it was proving to be difficult. "It's not. It's hard to explain but… it feels nice."

"It feels nice? I guess that's why there are so many humans about out there," Ken countered.

You shrugged a little before turning away from him again. "It's something I feel bad that you all miss out on here. Romance is one thing but… To me, it'd feel incomplete."

"It must feel real nice to compare it to everything else you listed."

When you looked to Ken, you noticed his blue eyes on you instantly. He didn't take them off of you, even for a moment, like he was a detective; trying to pull at your every word and expression.

"Y– Yeah, I guess so…"

"Show me."

Your eyes widened, still looking into his. He was giving you such an innocent yet sincere look – a serious expression laying so firmly on his face. "I–"

"I know, I don't… have… But just, tell me. Show me what else I'm missin'. If it feels so good and it doesn't exist here, maybe I'll feel just as good when I feel it outside. In the real world." Ken's voice was so raw; like every word that slipped his lips sounded genuine. He meant everything he ever said and in this moment, more than ever. Like you were the world he was missing at his fingertips.

You felt your heart race a little faster in your chest, you couldn't help but bring your knees to your chest slightly. "It feels like… like craving an ice cream on a hot day but the ice cream truck just gets pulled away every moment you get closer until… It suddenly stops. You get the ice cream and that first lick…"

"And?"

You smile to yourself, closing your eyes as your brows curled up a little. "It's wonderful, Ken."

You feel a small silence linger between the two of you which caused your eyes to shoot open again and you quickly looked away.

"I wanna feel it," Ken spoke out bluntly. He looked down at himself, like he knew what was missing but couldn't reach for any ice cream of his own. "What about… yours…?"

Yours. When that word left Ken's lips, you felt your face redden and your thighs seemed to clench together tighter. "M…ine?"

"It's touchin', right? That makes it feel good?"

You simply nodded to him, though you wanted to keep your attention off of his handsome face, so he wouldn't see how flustered yours was.

"Y/N," his voice fell a little, lower and almost into a whisper, "show me."

You felt your toes curl in your socks, your heart racing that little bit faster in your chest as you turned fully away from him now, looking behind you before slowly glancing back to him. "People will hear, Ken."

"No one can hear us, Y/N. It's just us."

You remained quiet, the feeling of your heart throb in your ears and between your thighs only grew faster and more intense as he spoke.

Before you could part your lips to finally speak, you watched Ken raise his hand and ghost it over the side of your face, his fingers barely in your hair. "Kiss me."

Your eyes flickered a few times before your lips parted, your own attention being drawn to his. You wanted to stay in the right headspace; to help Ken figure himself out but… with his offer, how could you say no?

You leaned forward and before you could even comprehend the situation you'd ended yourself up in, you felt the pressure of Ken's lips against yours, and my god, did it make you melt.

Your kiss only lasted for a moment before you both pulled away, your eyes flickered up to his blue hues looking down at you with a half lidded expression. "I didn't know you could…" you muttered, your lips still so close to his.

Ken smiled, almost smirking, down at you. "Kiss so good?" he cooed.

You nodded to him before pushing your skirt between your legs. You squirmed on the carpet the two of you were sitting on together, feeling your own non-barbie parts ache for something. Anything. Someone. Him. "I can show you… If you promise to not let anyone hear."

Those words alone were enough to cause Ken to chuckle a little. "I promise."

"A– And I'll promise if you think it… looks good enough, I'll…"

"I'd like that," he replied. "Promise kept, Y/N."

"Okay…" You sucked in your bottom lip a little, your teeth biting down on the flesh. You watched as Ken's eyes drifted to your hand between your thighs, pulling on the fabric of your little skirt. Your own attention was now there too; even if you had trouble building up the courage to move your hand. You wanted to show him. You really did. "T– This is embarrassing, y'know… S– So you owe me."

"Don't be embarrassed," Ken spoke softly, his body so close to yours now.

With your hand clenching at the hem of your skirt, you finally managed to pull it up a little, revealing your black panties with a pink ribbon at the lacy band.

"Woah," he muttered, his voice sinking a little, his eyes not leaving that pretty sight between your legs. "Okay…"

Your eyes glanced over to Ken beside you once more, his own eyes on your panties before you push your middle finger down the fabric that laid so tightly and beautifully over your clit – the pad of your finger pressed between the folds and your lips parted instantly; a small hum escaping from behind them when you quickly attempted to hide your moan.

Ken's attention was on your movements completely, watching as your finger circled your clit over your panties, your other hand still clenched so tightly on the hem of your skirt.

"Mmm…" another soft muffled moan purred behind your closed lips as you close your eyes, your finger not letting up on the pressure, the fabric of your panties causing friction on your clit. "K– Ken…"

The blonde man's eyes quickly drifted up from your hand to your face, his blue hues narrowing at the expressions you were making. He'd never seen someone look so… entranced. "Y/N…?"

"Want… you," you barely mouthed, your voice soft and meek. "Please…"

"To touch you?" Ken asked, like he wanted you to say it for yourself. He wasn't going to do anything without your consent at all.

"Mhm…" you hummed a yes to him, even though, in a less dazed state you'd know that wouldn't be enough for Ken Carson.

Ken's gaze searched your body like a pirate would a treasure map, almost like he was looking for the x. His eyes stopped on your face once again before slowly reaching his hand out to yours that was now flexing on Ken's shaggy carpet. "Y/N, use your words."

Your eyes flutter open just enough to look to him before nodding again, your other hand dancing along your clit not wavering at all. "Yes… Please. I want you to make me feel good."

With his attention flickering from your eyes to your lips, Ken brought his other hand to your jaw, his fingers in your hair as he brought you closer to him – your lips meeting each other one again, this time, though, you felt him deepen that kiss from before. His lips moved across yours in a way you wouldn't have guessed from him at all. Ken was full of surprises.

When his lips parted yours with a huff of hot breath escaping from the both of you, Ken whispered against your reddened lips, "Let's go somewhere more comfortable."

When you brought your body closer to him, you felt his hand wrap around yours, bringing you to your feet before pulling you across the room; you could barely make out a smirk spurred across his face through your almost half–dazed state.

He pulled you closer to him before his hands found your hips and lifted you up a little, pressing your body down onto the black silk sheets of his mattress. Your eyes glanced out of the window that looked out into Barbieland – Ken was right, it was quiet. You only assumed everyone else was at the beach. But not this Ken. You looked up at him, watching as he moved closer to you – you had more plans for this Ken right now than beach.

"It's not fair," you muttered as he was almost on top of you now.

"What?" he asked, his voice low and almost to a whisper.

"That you make me feel this way."

Ken chuckled, his brows raising slightly, "Good?"

"Good," you echoed his words before pulling him into another kiss, your tongue pushing into his mouth now. Maybe that surprised him but you weren't so sure, especially when he offered the same luxury. He seemed to be confident in what he was doing.

You pulled on his blue shirt to which he understood and practically ripped it off, discarding it elsewhere in the room.

"Fuck," your voice fluttered that word as it left your lips. You remembered he didn't have… what else you wanted but after this, I'm sure he'd like to have some experience of this ice cream himself.

"It's hot when you swear."

"It'd be hotter if you did."

Ken's brows shot up a little out of curiosity, that half smirk laying ever so confidentially on his face, "That fuckin' so?"

"Ken–!"

Before you could continue, you suddenly felt Ken's fingers slip under the lace of your panties which made you squirm under him instantly. You watched his eyes fall from yours to where his hand was, like he was trying to figure out what you were doing before over your panties. "It's wet here," he muttered. "What's all that about?"

You whimpered as his index and middle finger slipped over your clit before roaming further down, his digits lapping up everything he'd never felt before.

"Really wet," he whispered, his lips staying parted.

"Ken, that feels…!" You felt a moan pour from your lips now, your head falling into the pillow behind you. "S– So good…!"

"Yeah?" Ken's baby blues shifted back up to your face, watching your expression become one of pure bliss. "Shit, those faces ya makin'... It really feel that good?"

You felt Ken's middle finger circle your now swollen clit before pushing down along your slit, the wet noises from your cunt echoing in the room. "Y– Yes! Mmm! F– Fuck…!" you whimpered, clenching the sheets of the bed under you.

Before Ken could say anything else, he suddenly felt his middle finger slip inside you. When he opened his mouth to ask what just happened, instead a different kind of moan blessed his ears – one he hadn't heard yet. "Well, that must mean somethin' real good," he thought.

With that now in mind, he ran his index finger around your clit once more before slipping his middle into your slick pussy. The more he pushed further, the more you moaned and whimpered under him. "It's so wet and hot," he mumbled, his face falling a little closer to yours, feeling your body heat just that much warmer on him. "This feels awesome…"

"M– Move…" you whined, your hips jerking against him. "Pleaseplease…"

Something inside him made him want to egg you on more for some reason. Like, how far he could push you to beg even more. "Please what?" he asked, the tone in his voice was ever so teasing now. He was in for a fun game and he was gonna play hard ball.

You bit your bottom lip for a moment, turning your head to the side as you squeezed your eyes closed. "Ken… Ken, please." When his finger flicked around inside you, like he was testing you, another moan left your parted lips. "Want you~"

Ken's eyes drifted up your body, watching your squirm and wiggle under him. This was an ice cream flavour he definitely needed to try. "I'll give you all of me, baby." he pushed another finger inside you, his eyes on you as your head tilted back into the pillow. "All of me when we get outta this place too."

With those words, he pulled his fingers out of you before running your own slick up to your clit; oh, how he was enjoying watching you moan and whine much like a needy animal. If he knew whatever you were feeling felt this good, he'd left Barbieland with you much sooner.

He pushed his fingers into your cunt again, curling them around inside; like he wanted to feel every part of you. Be where you feel most euphoric. And, oh, how did you feel it. The way he slowly moved his digits in and out of you was making you see stars – especially when you were in those stars fantasising about how his cock would feel inside you too. New territory. Again. How fun.

"This what you wanted, Y/N?" he purred, his face ever so close to yours, his eyes dancing over your lewd expression. "Wanted this Ken to finger fuck you?"

You gasped, throwing your hands over your face; looking through your fingers up at the blonde doll in front of you. How he seemed to be all about your needs in that moment, the way the movements of his fingers curling in and out of you didn't waver. Fuck, fuck, fuck, you were in deep trouble with this. "Mhm…" you mumbled, soft moans still escaping your peachy lips. "I'm… I'm gonna…"

You saw Ken's brows raise a little, his head tilted further down slightly to bring himself closer to you. "Gonna what? Tell me…"

"Ken–" you felt your hand quickly wrap around his forearm, your other to the bedsheets when his fingers begin moving faster against your tight cunt; feeling yourself getting wetter and closer to climaxing. "Ice-cream…!"

Ken's blue eyes flickered a little as his attention stayed on your face. "...Sounds tasty." He brought his thumb to your clit with his fingers still pumping inside you; grazing your sensitive nub with the pad of his thumb as he watched you twirl your hips more and more as you drew closer.

"F– Fuck! Ken…!"

That hot tied knot that ached in your core finally lifted, feeling yourself let go as you came around Ken's fingers. "Ah!" you gasped and whined as Ken pulled his fingers out with a wet pop sound, your pussy fluttering and twitching around nothing as you jolted your thighs up into him.

Ken was quiet for a moment, looming over you as he watched your breathing fasten in your chest, your hips trying to push down onto him. "You look so pretty like this, Y/N," he almost growled those words as he looked down at you. He reached his hand out and grabbed your chin, pulling your face down to look him in the eyes. "I don't wanna forget the look on your face right now."

"K…en…" you mumbled through sharp breaths.

"Tonight, you n' me… We do this the whole way, right?" he asked, his eyes glued to yours. "I still wanna touch you like this." He brought his hand back to your pussy, his index and middle fingers stroking up and along your wet slick which only caused you to whimper again, your brows curling up in delight. "There it is. My pretty girl.

Let's get that ice cream together."

[traumaboyexo]

CARRION!Sif Ghostfrin Event

[[Still pending a better name like Parasite Siffrin or Abomination Siffrin or maybe even a title I dunno]]

"Ah!"

(Isabeau points up ahead. Your heart nearly stops as you look ahead yourself.)

(It's the ghost.)

(Bonnie is the next to gesture towards it. )

"Look! Here!"

(Mirabelle.)

"That's...That really does look like Siffrin, doesn't it?"

(Sure.)

(It looks like Siffrin. Maybe it really is Siffrin.)

(And if they are...)

(Odile frowns. She's clearly the more disturbed of your family regarding this situation.)

"Another one, huh?"

(So they could all see it this whole time.)

(Ghost. Spirits.)

(You thought you were hallucinating it out of guilt, but that makes sense.)

(Monsters don't feel guilt. Monsters don't feel anything.)

(You find your voice once more.) "You guys can see it too, huh?"

(What would a ghost taste like. If possible, maybe if you eat it fast enough, they'll forget it was even here.)

"Yes??? Of course???" (Mirabelle looks at you in confusion. Somehow, you nearly break a smile. The notion that may be crazy has passed through your head more than once, and yet...)

(For her to look at you, so confused, it's almost comforting.)

(Bonnie speaks up.) "Yeah, weird Frin copies!"

(Odile sighs.) "Don't worry, Siffrin. I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me as well. Take relief in knowing the both of us are not becoming delusional."

(No, you aren't.)

(Your real problem is so much worse.)

(You reply.) "Thank you. Good to know my brain isn't broken from all my napping."

"So, are we gonna say hi?" (You turn your head and look at Iseabau, doing your best to hide your disbelief and fear.)

(He wants to greet it?!)

"Me too, I wanna see the weird not-Frin!"

(You're on the opposite end of Bonnie's enthusiasm.)

(You're horrified.)

(If it really is Siffrin, if it's really their ghost...)

(What would he say? What would they do?)

(You don't even want to think about it. You don't even get a chance to. Because your family has already rushed ahead.)

(Isabeau's cheery voice rings out first.)

"Hey, ghost Sif! How are you-ah!"

(Almost immediately, Isabeau turns around and quickly covers Bonnie's eyes.)

"HEY! ISA?! WHAT'S CRABBING GOING ON?!"

(Mirabelle glances over at them for a brief second before looking at the face of the ghost herself.)

(...her eyes widen in horror and her legs instantly give out. She would have fallen to the floor if Odile hadn't caught her.)

"Woah. Easy easy, I got you." (Odile looks at the ghost's face herself, and her face turns into one of great unease as well.)

"...gems alive."

(...a slimy wet, sound.)

(...the ghost is melting.)

(Slowly, it begins to droop and drip parts of itself as it becomes smaller and smaller, slowly dropping into a formless sludge puddle of itself.)

(...and then it fades, sinking into the ground...until it's no more.)

(There's a long pause.)

(Everyone is still. Silent. Even Bonnie stopped trying to escape Isabeau's grasp.)

(Isabeau is the first to make any movement, taking his hands off Bonnie's eyes.)

Bonnie: "...what happened?"

Bonnie: "There was a scary...wet sound and-"

(Mirabelle exhales heavily. Her voice and breath is shaking.)

Mirabelle: "O-oh change..."

Mirabelle: "I...I..."

(She looks over at you.)

(She's terrified.)

(...everyone else is staring at you the exact same way.)

(...you have to know.)

"So? Did it have a third eye or something?"

(...that was suppose to be a joke. You smile during jokes. You forgot to smile.)

(Odile seems to have noticed that.)

(She is the first to answer you.)

"...Siffrin."

"You're not hurt anywhere again, are you?"

(...huh?)

"No?"

"No cuts? No bruises or scrapes?"

(Wouldn't matter.)

"No."

"How about...headaches? Naseau? Feeling dizzy? Are you unwell in anyway, Siffrin?"

(Why won't she tell you.)

"No!"

"Really? Absolutely sure. Remember last time, we didn't realise you had a cut under your arm until-"

(You need to know!)

"I said I'm FINE! TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG!"

"...what did you guys see?"

(She continues to stare without a response.)

"Uhm...I'll be on explaining duty then, M'dame." (Isabeau walks away from the group and pulls you aside, while Bonnie, Mirabelle and Odile start to discuss amongst themselves.)

"Don't be too hard on M'dame Odile, what we saw was just...a little scary is all."

(Scary? How?) "It didn't seem like it did anything."

"It...didn't. That's why it was kinda scary."

"So, it was standing in front, and we went up to it, cause it was kind of strange it wasn't facing us."

"And luckily I was the first to see it, or Bonnie would have seen it as well."

"It didn't flinch when I called out to it. It didn't even try to look at us."

"It's face was..."

(Isabeau looks uncomfortable even trying to remember it.)

(...You have to know.) "What? What about the face?"

"Yeah yeah, sorry, it was...Uhm..."

"...well, it was covered in scars. Bleeding scars. And its eyes were...gone? Its mouth was open, and it kinda looked like..."

"...like if someone had died, standing up, and refused to sit down."

"But then its lips started moving like they were trying to talk. But I didn't hear a noise voice or noise or anything."

"And then...well, then it started to turn into goop, and that was it."

"So you can see why Mirabelle was so startled, she was already super stressed, but I think...I think it'll be fine."

"And, don't worry about M'dame Odile, you know how she is. She's always worried about us, even if she won't say she is."

(...)

(Startled.)

(Worried.)

(Haha.)

(Hahaha.)

(Ha.)

(...Mirabelle and the rest are walking towards you now.)

"Sorry about that...it was just a little overwhelming...but I feel better now."

(She shouldn't.)

"But Siffrin, if anything is ever wrong...please make sure to tell me. O-or any of us."

(You won't.)

(Maybe if you're hungry.)

(But not about....)

(Odile continues to frown.)

"Siffrin."

(She stares for just a few more moments, before looking away.)

"...nevermind."

"I think we've wasted too much time. We should get going."

(...they're afraid. You made them afraid.)

(Why couldn't they have just stopped. Why couldn't they have just ignored it.)

(WHY COULDN'T THEY HAVE STAYED STILL AND LET IT FADE AWAY!)

(You're always worried they won't care about you, but for once now you regret making them care!)

(You're disgusting, you're selfish, you're horrifying.)

(They've seen it, NOW THAT'S ALL THEY'LL THINK OF YOU WHEN--)

[REWIND]

"Ah!"

(Isabeau points up ahead.)

(Bonnie is the next to gesture towards it. )

"Look! Here!"

(Mirabelle.)

"That's...That really does look like Siffrin, doesn't it?"

(No.)

"I don't see anything."

(Even without looking back, you can feel everyone's confusion focused on you.)

"Sif? You really don't see the...ghost you?"

(You don't respond.)

(You wait. And wait. And wait.)

(...and soon...)

(...it's gone.)

(...you feel hungry.)

[rebouks]

Let's be nosy and see what a few folks have been up to recently and/or since Somnium ended, shall we..? 👀

Kaden/Joey are still around, somewhere.. Joey would probably tell you by accident, but Kaden keeps him on a tight leash. I very much doubt either of them have changed their ways, you can't teach an old dog new tricks and all that... I dunno if we'll really see em again properly, though I never say never!

Brynn, Ace and Robert may have left Del Sol, but Randy and Genesis are still stuck in their old ways. Sissy likes the attention and money from her "job" too much to leave. I think part of her still hopes someone's gonna whisk her away to a life of luxury and she'll live happily ever after, just like Brynn did.. assumedly 😩 Randy won't leave without her ofc, and he doesn't really like change anyway. He's lazy, what else is he gonna do?! The motel barely makes any money either, but he manages with a few odd jobs from the less savoury folks around town. They're doing swell 👍

Luckily, no one ever ratted on Darien and he was far too careful to end up under the microscope without being exposed - especially since Wyatt left the scene - so he moved back to San My eventually. Ever the workaholic, he found himself a job at the same accounting/law firm as Wade (props to anyone who remembers him lmaoo) he doesn't need the money but he'd probably go insane without a job ngl 😆 He doesn't really find it easy to make friends either, and Wade recently found himself behind bars for a lil tiny bit of tax evasion so he's pretty lonely-.. although he did meet a fellow asexual lady friend he's been on a couple dates with recently. They have fun n' get on well, but she thinks he's this straight laced/awkward accountant and it makes him feel weird, like he's lying about himself.. so idk how long that'll last. I think he kinda misses being part of a "family", however fucked up it was.. but most of all, he just misses Wyatt 😔

Alma and Mack have been hanging out more often recently, just casually tho u kno?? She likes her freedom too much to give it all up, and although he's a great lover, he's a terrible boyfriend lmaoo.. I think she's accepted that Mack is Mack so they're not making it serious or official this time. They're not exactly getting any younger either, may as well have some fun whilst they're still here, right?! Kobe's considering moving out 'cause eugh 😆

Brivan n' co are just kinda living life right now, working, hanging out with Jacob/Suzie/Miya a fair bit and tryna get used to the news of Jude n' such u kno? Pixie's hitting her milestones like a champ ofc, but she's a picky eater just like her pappy 😅 Bruno insists he's fine but he's been a lil quiet and weird recently. Part of him still struggles with his old self and his guilt, though he ain't exactly a talker, so he retreats into himself now and then instead. He's been thinking of proposing to Ivan occasionally as well, but he doesn't want to do it whilst he's in a funk AND he's a lil worried (aka majorly overthinking) the fact that Ivan might not take too well to being proposed to?? But wait, nah.. he'd love it, right? Maybe-.. unless he hated it, maybe he'd rather be the one to ask-.. should he? Yes-.. no, wait-.. maybe?!!? Probably-.. AGHHHHHFJSDK <- said Bruno's brain 🙈

Jessie and Ivan have been taking it slow, mostly since she's so damn busy all the time, but also 'cause they hardly know each other n' all. Ivan's kinda bummed she's slow to trust him, but he can't exactly blame her so he's being patient n' meeting them whenever he can. Jude is so smitten with his new pappy tho, he even wanted to grow his hair just like him 😭 Oscar n' Robin have tagged along a few times as well since the kiddos are practically the same age, but idk if Robin is too sure abt Jude just yet! He's very talkative and he's a big hugger.. I wonder where he gets that from?? 🤣 I think Jessie's finally warming up to the idea of sharing Jude 'cause she agreed to leave him alone with Ivan for a sleepover soon! They're gonna get dressed up n' head to Oscar's for a spooky party! Oh, and Oscar thinks Jessie has a nice rack....... boi plz 🙄

Not pictured/spied upon..

Tilda - she's just existing rn tbh! She hangs out with Brivan/Pixie now n' then which she enjoys more than she'll let on! She's tryna stay away from dating and focus on herself too.. but she's not all that keen on herself so that's hard work 😩 a few dates here n' there but nothing interesting! She's also still ignoring her family.

Noah n' co - Aspen started teaching a few mommy/toddler yoga classes in the upstairs portion of Noah's gallery since he barely uses it, Juni loves it! Juni started ballet recently too 🩰 Noah's still salty with Oscar for not hanging out more but the man's busy dammit! I think Oscar's glad he's on semi-decent terms with everyone but he'd rather keep them at arms length so it stays that way skdjskjd

Salton - Alton's still Alton lmao.. though Sid gives him more shit nowadays since she's mostly retired she's realised he's even lazier than she thought and I'm sure she regrets letting him get a TV! She's a bit bored/lost tbh, which is why she hasn't fully retired yet.. introspection doesn't suit her (so says she) and she doesn't like all this extra time to think n' shit.. ough 🙈

Rhys & Tommy - both finished uni wooooooo! They're staying with Rhys' parents for now tho, Tommy's not rlly sure what to do with his psychology degree yet but he still thinks he'd like to be a psychologist so maybe he'll get a job/save up n' do his masters or smth?! Rhys has been taking on jobs as a wedding/event photographer for now, but he'd like to veer more towards photography as an art form-.. tho he's not sure how to go about that just yet either 🤔 they're figuring it out and they're happy so it doesn't rlly matter toooo much for now

Uhhhhh idk I've probably missed some folk out but feel free to ask abt anyone else in the comments! 🧡

[scenetocause]

can i ask about grid boy oscar please?

ofc. grid boy oscar my beloved.

basically: the fia brings gridpeople back as a concept but they're there all season and it's an excuse to put oscar in a skimpy leotard, as well as various situations like having to participate in an FIA litterpicking initiative and endorse synthetic fuel as part of the "grid for good". all of this happens in front of a particularly half-drowned cat lando who's desperately lonely and kind of falling apart. also logan is lando's teammate (bc if no oscar he would have won f3, etc) and they are quite fun to write together.

lando basically falls in love with his hot, slightly awkward grid boy and keeps giving oscar his coat or hoodie and things when he's cold or his umbrella when it's hot and oscar's a bit bemused about it but not arguing because he only took this job to try and make contacts with teams about an engineering internship. except there's this cute, weird driver who keeps asking him to hang out and keep him company at dinner and falling asleep while oscar's sitting on his bed and lando sometimes looks so pathetically needy. oscar has no idea what he could do to help him out but he wants to.

so lando sort of staggers through the season, with oscar as more and more of a support and they're both a little bit lost but helping each other enough and then perhaps they have a lovely little snog when they realise they're going to be separated and oh, maybe they won't be, then.

snippet under the cut

“What do you think about the grid girls - well, grid people?” Lando is not expecting Ted Kravitz to ambush him, Notebook mic in hand, while he was trying to re-do his shoelace under the only bit of rain cover near McLaren’s hospitality in Suzuka.

“Uh.” He blinks, water dripping in front of his eyes. “They’re uh, they’re very nice?”

Ted gives him a look like that’s not the right answer and Lando’s mouth panics before his brain has time to catch up. 

“Nice people, you know. They clearly have lots of passion for Formula 1 and they-” there’s rain running into his mouth, off his hood. Has to pause to swallow and shake his head like a dog. “They’re here, you know, because of that.”

“Oh, right.” Ted nods. “Yes, it’s good for them, isn’t it?”

There’s a note of concern in his voice that says he’s not totally sure what they just had was a coherent conversation but it’s the Notebook so. Whatever. Lando shakes himself again, water spraying, as Ted burbles away from him and he finally gets the sopping wet lace on his team trainers into something approaching a knot that might hold to the car park, at least.

Logan catches up to him with a papaya umbrella halfway there. “Dude. You’re soaked.”

Ok, yeah, Lando probably should have thought about an umbrella himself. He’s a bit out of sorts, lately - Jon used to handle all that sort of thing for him and he’s actually fine coping on his own and it’s ok for Jon to be home for a few races and Lando’s an adult, yeah? He’s leading the team, Logan doing well enough but the points gap between them clear, Lando getting asked about executive-level decisions in the group like he’s one of the real grown ups, lately. 

So he’s doing fine, alright? Just, like, a bit wet. On this particular occasion. Sometimes he’s also thirsty and can’t find his water bottle or hungry and hasn’t remembered there’s a wrap ready in the fridge but he’s basically alright. His back hurts more but he’s fine, it’s only a few races. He can do this.

“Where’s the - team car or whatever, anyway?” Now he’s under the umbrella it’s obvious quite how bad it was, water sluicing off the spokes like it’s out of a tap. 

“I dunno.” Logan sighs, heavily. “I just figured Zak’d probably have another reason to fire me if I let you drown.”

[greazyfloz]

27 & 29 smut with dylan duke

Smut: 27. "Let’s pump a couple babies into ya” & 29. "I don’t share” w/ Dylan Duke

Sooner Than You Think

Dylan and I got into a random argument about having children while we were out at dinner with some of his friends from his hometown. One of his friends told us that they were expecting then it became a big joke that I Dylan and I should try for a kid to so they could be best friends.

Dylan started making remarks about having children that started to make me a little upset as the night went on, "imagine they could learn to play hockey together" Marissa, his friends girlfriend exclaimed

"Yeah, maybe your next child" he says laughing and we all laughed along with him, "or maybe the next one after that" he continued. By that point I kinda started to have the feeling that kids weren't really in his ideal future.

"or maybe with your next girlfriend" one of his drunk friends said. I shook it off at first thinking he was just drunk, but Dylan laughed

"Yeah maybe" Dylan says laughing along. Some of the people laughed along until they realized I took offence to that. Everyone at the table became slightly awkward and Dylan looks around at everyone, "What?" he says then finally looks at me.

"fuck. you." I say standing from my seat and grabbing my purse from the chair

"What?" he says looking at me confused, "Where are you going?"

"Leaving so your next girlfriend can have a place to sit"

I then storm out of the restaurant we were in and walked over to the bar next door. I made my way in and went directly to the bar. I took a seat next to a random guy, that ended up being very attractive.

"Hey" he says with a smile, I just nod my head and raise my hand trying to get the bartenders attention, "rough night?"

"Kinda" I say as the bartender makes their way over, "just give me a water" I tell him and he nods then pour me a water

"So, what brings a pretty girl like you into a bar like this, all by herself?" he guy says

"Well that didn't sound creepy at all" I say looking at him weird

"It did didn't it" he laughs, "I swear I'm not going to chop you up" he says making me laugh

"I'm Y/n" I tell him

"What a pretty name, it suits you" he tells me, "I'm Andrew. Typically pretty girls don't come to this bar" he tells me

"Typically, I don't go to bars alone unless I'm here to forget something"

"Something or someone?" Andrew asks

"You're smart" I tell him

"Well, it's going to take more than a glass of water to forget him, what did he do?"

"He doesn't want to have kids... Well with me"

"Is he ugly? maybe he is scared the kid will come out ugly and you will know who to blame" he says making me laugh again

"He isn't ugly" I say as I begin to stop laughing, "He must think I'm ugly"

"You're pretty, but you need some glasses" he says, "and buddy needs a brain for letting you leave him"

"Thank you, but I didn't leave him... yet I guess" I say to him

"Well when you do think about leaving him, here is my number" he says while writing his number on a napkin then sliding it over.

"She won't be needing it" Dylan says then sliding the napkin back over to Andrew.

"You must be the boyfriend" he says to Dylan

"Yeah" he says then looks at me, "Come on, let's go"

"It was nice to meet you" I say to Andrew as I look around Dylan.

"You know where to find me" he says in a reassuring tone as I walk out of the bar with Dylan following close behind me. Dylan looks back and gives Andrew a dirty look before placing his hand on the small of my back guiding me out the door. I step to the side away from his touch and we continue to walk side by side to his car.

The drive back to his place was quiet because no one said a word until we got onto his street.

"Who was that guy?"

"Andrew"

"Andrew who?

"Dunno"

"How do you know him?"

"I don't"

"Would you talk to me normally?" he says to me and I shake my head looking out the window, "please?"

"Maybe the next girlfriend will communicate better"

"Oh my god" he says as he turns the car into the driveway, "let it go"

I open the door as he puts the car in park, and march into his house. He is quick behind me carrying my purse, I didn't even know that I left behind. I open the door and close it but he catches it walking in behind me.

"I laughed at a joke Y/n!" he says as he follows behind me on the way up the stairs to his room. "Come on, I'd pop a baby in you right now if I could" he says and I turn around and look at him wide eyed, "no one is home"

"You literally said we would have a kid when they had their 3rd!" I said to him, "you know I want kids Dylan so did you say that just to hurt me?!"

"No!"

"Why would he even joke about a 'next girlfriend'?"

"I don't know!"

"Well, let me know when you figure it out?"

"Okay, why am I all in the wrong here? You are bringing up me and my next girlfriend who doesn't even exist, but I find you all over a guy at the bar?!" he says raising his voice

I stand up and walk you to him and look at him with a tight look on my face, "fuck you" I say to him still staring at him as he licks his lips

"Please" he says leaning down to press his lips on mine. We begin to make out as he back me against the wall and pulls away, "I don't share"

He then reaches down and takes my shirt off, then I reach back and take my bra off as he takes his shirt off too. Once we are both topless he begins making out with me again as we make our way to his bed. "Your mouth is addicting" he says into the kiss.

He tugs my pants and I take the hint to pull them down along with my panties before kneeling down onto my knees. He looks down at me and watches me unbutton his pants then pulling them off before stroking his cock. I don't take anymore time and begin sucking his cock back and forth until his cock is all the way in.

I take him out of my mouth to catch my breath then like up his shaft and begin sucking his cock again. "Your turn" he says to me as I look up at him. I stand up and Dylan pushes me back onto the bed. He crawls on top on me and kisses my lips gently, "You know I love you right?" he asks me

"Yes baby" I say to him as he begins kissing down my stomach

"Good" he says

He reaches my pussy and licks up my slit once. His fingers rub circles around my clit before they move down and he slides two into my pussy. He leans forward and begins sucking on my clit as I reach to the sides of the bed, grabbing onto the sheets, moaning loudly as I feel his fingers begin to curl inside on me, "Yes Dylan!" I moan out.

He then switches his fingers and mouth and begins pumping his tongue in and out of me while sucking my pussy as his fingers rub my clit. "O-oh!" I moan loudly, "Oh my god!". I throw my head back but then he stops.

He makes his way back up to my lips and kisses them gently, then makes his way into my neck. "You want a baby?" he says as he continues sucking on my neck

"Dylan" I say breathlessly

"Tell me" he muffles into my neck

"Y-yes"

"Okay" he says standing up from the bed

"Dylan?" I question him cautiously, in case that made him mad. He pulls me to the edge of the bed then smiles at me.

"Let's pump a couple babies into ya"

He positions his cock at my entrance and pushes himself deep inside of me, "Dylan!" I moan out as he continues to pump himself hard and fast inside of me, "You feel so good!"

"Tell me what you want" he grunts out as he thrusts inside of me

"I want you to fuck me" I moan out

"Yeah? Tell me more!" he says almost out of breath

"I-I want you to f-fuck me until you fill me up!"

He continues fucking me through my orgasm as I drag my nails down his back. I whimper loudly as I release myself on his cock and he smiles proud at himself at me.

"I'm close" he tells me as he continues pumping himself but becoming sloppier. He grunts as he releases himself inside my pussy. After he cums he lays in the bed beside me and looks at me, "What were we fighting about again?"

We both laugh before he stand up from the bed, "You're just going to leave me here?" I ask him as he opens the bedroom door

"I'm going to the shower if you wanna join, you know the answer is always yes" he winks

I follow behind him after i hear the shower turn on. I open the bathroom door and then slide the shower door open. Before he turns around, I wrap my arms around him.

"Babe?" I ask him

"Yeah?"

"Do you actually want to have a baby?" I ask him and he turns around in my arms to look at me, "or should I go get the morning after pill tomorrow?"

"I do want a baby" he says but doesn't smile, "I don't know when but I'll be ready when it happens"

I smile at him and he smiles back bringing back in for a hug. I rest my head against his chest before he looks down at me and presses a kiss on my lips

"Can I tell you why dinner made me really upset?" I ask him taking a step back, and he nods, "I'm pregnant"

[punsmaster69]

12/MAR/20XX

"BROTHER?"

papyrus knocked on my door a few more times. he sounded upset.

still searching around my room, i looked again at the vacant spot on my ulna.

not under the bed, from what i could see. sure as hell not getting all the way under there to check, though.

under blankets?

a messy ball of sheets sits plainly in the middle of my mattress.

probably not.

the last two days are a blur, and i can't remember a few things.

where did i put it?

when did i take it off?

is that why my head hurts or am i somehow still hungover?

my brother calls my name again; the tinge of worry seeping through his tone snaps my thoughts into focus.

whatever papyrus was upset about, he'd definitely be more so if he saw that i didn't have the monitor on.

pulling down my sleeves fails; no jacket.

"(where-)"

scanning the area for only a moment before stopping, the image of my jacket hanging off the couch arm appears in my mind.

"(damn it.)"

i opt to cover my monitor-less arm with a baggy long-sleeved shirt i haven't touched in ages.

excuses and explanations flipped though my mind as i reach for the door handle.

" 'sup, bro-?"

"oh."

the reason for my surprise suddenly dangled in front of my face.

"I WAS WORRIED SOMETHING HAD HAPPENED WHEN YOU WERE ALL QUIET."

"REGARDLESS, NOW THAT I CAN SEE THAT YOU'RE ALRIGHT..."

he dropped the dangling reason into my hand, and put his hands on his hips.

"WHEN DID YOU EVEN TAKE IT OFF?"

with an oddly shaky hand, i start re-attaching the device to my arm.

"dunno."

i struggle a bit with the latch.

"DO YOU KNOW WHY IT WAS UNDER A PILLOW, SHOVED IN A DRAWER??"

a vague memory of irritatedly trying to silence the beeping device flashed through my mind.

"..got annoyed, i think."

papyrus leans down to help attach it to my arm, pausing to take note of my unintentional tremorings.

he turns my arm over to properly re-enable the device. papyrus frowns when it turns red within seconds of being on.

his face tells me he's forming a plan about something - i interject.

"you, uh. reckon i could get something to eat before anything else?"

papyrus pulls himself back to the current moment.

"RIGHT. THAT WOULD A GOOD IDEA."

"......huh."

"can't actually remember the last thing i ate."

"WELL, I TRIED TO GET YOU TO EAT A LITTLE YESTERDAY... BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE MUCH."

"..."

"huh?"

i wracked my (metaphorical) brain for any other memories past being a few drinks in at grillby's.

practically nothing.

"...WHAT'S THAT LOOK?"

"IS SOMETHING WRONG?"

"jeez. i'm gettin' way worse hangovers than i used to."

——

"SURELY THIS IS NOT THE ONLY SOLUTION."

i summoned another bone into the pile.

"well. it's the easiest way."

"I... I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME YOU TRIED TO SUMMON YOUR SPECIAL ATTACK, BUT..."

"..i don't know if it's a good idea, bro."

"IF YOU DON'T FIRE IT, MAYBE YOUR EYE WON'T, UM."

he shifted his feet around in the grass.

"E-EXPLODE."

"......"

picking myself up off the ground, i slowly raised my arm and-

"WAIT, WAIT!"

"..?"

"M-MAYBE IT'S NOT A GREAT IDEA AFTER ALL. FORGET IT."

"YOU CAN TRY SOMETHING ELSE! LIKE..."

papyrus looks frantically around, as if the solution would be around us in the yard somewhere.

rather than piling bones again, i summoned bones from the ground in a single-file line beside me. one of the bones accidentally strikes a red ball that frisk must have left behind, launching it in the air.

"whoops."

immediately, i have to summon a barricade between me and the ball getting ready to make impact with my skull.

papyrus picks the ball up... i can see gears turning in his head.

he throws it directly at me.

𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙠.

it hits a wall of my own bones in front of me.

"...uh-"

launching it into the air again with his own attack, papyrus tosses it a little softer at me.

rather than guard, i catch the ball this time. again, i give my brother a confused look before tossing it back to him. papyrus makes a face.

"NO, USE YOUR MAGIC TO SEND IT BACK!"

shooting from the dirt below him, a precisely-aimed attack strikes the ball from his hands directly into the air. with his right hand he yanks the bone out of the ground. that bone, which he spins before using it to smack the ball towards me once more.

tucking my own right hand in my pocket, i step back and summon an attack with my left.

we bounce the ball back and forth a few times this way, but papyrus quickly changes things.

he pretends to miss smacking the ball, de-summoning the bone last second and instead just grabbing and hurling it above his head into the air as far as he could.

a bone shoots from the yard behind me, bouncing the ball in my direction.

it wasn't going super fast.. still, i could tell he switched because he wanted me to alternate methods as well. so, i propped up the bone i was using and summoned two long bones connected by a center one. setting the oddly-shaped attack on the propped up bone, i crouched below it just in time as the ball landed on the attack - it rolled down the bones like a slide. with a tiny attack to boost it at the end, i return the ball to my brother.

he catches it in his hands with a look of surprise on his face.

"...YOU MADE SOMETHING OUT OF YOUR ATTACKS."

i looked at the strange bone-slide. it's certainly different from anything i would have done before. what possessed me to make it, i'm not sure.

"whoops."

"...THAT ATTACK IS..."

my brother inspects the construction a few times, tucking the ball under his arm as he does a few circles around it.

"YEP, FOR SURE."

"IT'S JUST AS I THOUGHT."

"THAT ATTACK PATTERN..."

"..?"

"...IS SUPER COOL!!"

papyrus jumps up and down excitedly around me in a circle.

"..thanks, bro."

"SEE?! YOU CAN DEFINITELY DO OTHER THINGS WITH YOUR ATTACKS!"

"I WILL NOT LET YOU LIMIT YOURSELF! STARTING NOW, NO LONGER WILL YOU RESTRICT YOURSELF TO EXCLUSIVELY PILING BONES!!"

the slight feeling of accomplishment i had gotten from actually doing something was quickly replaced with mild dread.

i'd just unintentionally raised the standard bar of effort for me off the floor.

i make a swift movement with my foot to knock the structure off-balance a little when papyrus isn't looking directly at me.

"it is pretty cool, huh?"

"it's really a-"

the bones all clatter against each other as they fall into the grass beside me. i make a show of looking visibly upset.

"oh no..."

"i had done so good....."

"guess i'll just have to stick to my normal attacks. what a shame, really."

"i just wasn't ready for the responsibility."

"NONSENSE, BROTHER! THAT JUST MEANS YOU NEED MORE PRACTICE. WORRY NOT, HOWEVER!"

papyrus puts a hand confidently to his chest and his cape immediately catches a breeze that wasn't there.

"I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, PROMISE TO ASSIST YOU IN YOUR ATTACK PRACTICING JOURNEY!!!"

"..........cool."

"I KNOW! NOW, SHALL WE CONTINUE?"

i look at the device on my wrist. papyrus notices this, and instantly appears beside me to look as well.

green.

"...another time."

with a wave of my hand, i de-summon all of my attacks and park myself under the shade of a nearby tree.

"i'm low on battery."

"...."

papyrus sits cross-legged in the grass beside me.

he begins to toss the ball up and down by himself. the rhythmic sound of him tossing and catching it, the comfort of leaning against a tree - a tree that's not some coniferous one, like all the ones we had ever seen back then.

i close my eyesockets.

...

the sound of him catching the ball stops.

i peek open one eye.

"...MUST YOU CALL IT BATTERY?"

"hm?"

"CAN YOU NOT SIMPLY SAY THAT YOU ARE TIRED? EXHAUSTED? WEARY? DEPLETED?"

"bone-tired?"

"EXACTLY! WHY NOT SOMETHING LIKE THAT?"

"what, i can't call it battery?"

"WELL-"

"which it clearly is because we take those?"

whipping around to face me.

"WE DO NOT!!"

"yeah, you're right."

"SO WH-"

"i switched to solar power."

with a decent amount of force, he slams the ball into the ground and it bounces away.

"NO! YOU ALREADY ADMITTED TO THAT BEING A HOAX. WE ARE 𝙉𝙊𝙏 DOING IT AGAIN!!!"

"you just hate that your model's more outdated than mine now."

"UGH!"

loud, dramatic sigh.

"WHY DO YOU ATTEMPT TO DELUDE ME OVER THIS RIDICULOUS THING, BROTHER?"

"i'm not deluding you at all."

"THEN MAYBE YOU ARE SIMPLY DELUSION𝘈𝘓."

"nah."

"YOU HAVE TO BE."

i flip the back of his cape over his head.

"nah."

he grabs my hood and pulls it over my head to cover my face.

"DEFINITELY ARE!"

flipping it back up, i lightly punch his shoulder.

"naahh."

papyrus punches back just as gently, then scooches backwards to lean beside me against the tree.

"CERTAINLY, YOU'VE LOST YOUR MARBLES."

he lets himself loosely fall sideways, sinking his weight into me a little.

"they're all here. i could even count 'em for you."

"CLEARLY NOT, AS YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE 𝘛𝘈𝘞-KING ABOUT."

"NYEHEHEHE."

"......"

"..took me a second. nice, though."

"MH."

he yawns.

"huh."

"maybe i'm solar powered, and you're solar..."

"solar."

"....can't think of the reverse of powered. drained? battery'nt?"

"dunno. do y-"

my brother, who's usually protesting against my daytime naps, had fallen asleep rather quickly in the comfort of the shade.

"..heh."

"can't blame you."

i shelve my idea to tease papyrus about it for now, instead taking the opportunity to follow his lead.

[nyaskitten]

Tell me about your au plz :3

(IMPORTANT NOTE: I REFER TO CHARACTERS BY THEIR ACTUAL NAMES IF I DON'T HAVE A NAME FOR THEM YET, THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT I'M NAMING ANYONE NYA OR WYLDFYRE OR ANY OF THAT!!!)

OK !!! So the details are very messy cuz I just came up with this idea last night while drawing my guy the Nightmare King from Dreamzzz... Basically it's this super self-indulgent story where I just mix shit from Dreamzzz/Ninjago/LMK/Chima for the fucken sake of it!!!

In this story, the main characters are a Kai ripoff, Nya ripoff, and a Wyldfyre ripoff!!! Wyldfyre ripoff is Kai's youngest sister (Kai 22, Nya 20, Wyldfyre 8-10, probably 10), and she also has a pet dragon who she found years ago (knockoff Heatwave!!!)

For elemental powers, those are like these magical crystals called Elemental Cores, which you are blessed with (idk how yet) by ancient dragon lords (they all go by kings but they're not all men.) Kai has his Core somehow, and same for Nya! Unfortunately, Wyldfyre doesn't yet, either due to being too young or not proven herself yet! She doesn't let it bum her out too much because her epic dragon can grant her sort of temporary Core powers (kinda like Chi from Chima). Unbeknownst to them there's a special reason Wyldfyre and the others can accept powerups like this without detrimental side effects (I won't tell.)

The story goes something like this, a few years ago (probably between 3-5) Kai's parents and uncles (in this story Wu and Garmadon are his uncles) mysteriously go missing, and in present day he hears rumors of an ancient dragon king (Overlord) whose darkness has slowly been festering and increasing greatly. Initially, Kai doesn't care, "Surely if this nonsense were to be true, the great Dragon Knights (he doesn't know it, but they're his dad and uncles) will find out about and stop it!" Idk WHY he decides to go yet, but he takes Nya and the dragon, and leaves Wyldfyre with the others... but she does her own thing and follows. It's too late to turn back now, so reluctantly, Kai has to keep his baby sister out of trouble!

For characters, I'm not too sure how many I'm taking from which series' yet...

I know I have Kai, Nya, Wyldfyre, a Lloyd/Arin combo possibly, Jay, Ray, Maya, Wu, Garmadon, the Overlord, and Misako. I'm ALSO taking Lord Ras for self-indulgence reasons, and renaming naming him Korros (for fun and maybe Wu/Korros exes yaoi!) I also know I wanna get some Monkie Kid inspiration, so I'm thinking of the Lady Bone Demon, but crossed with fanon interpretations of the Preeminent as well! Also, again self-indulgence, Nightmare King from Dreamzzz, and also totally Cinder come the fuck on I need Cinder.

I dunno if I'll add Zane or Cole tho... part of me wants to do a Kalmaar knockoff just for one hyperspecific joke of like, Korros is taking forever to find some hidden mechanism in a wall, and Kalmaar goes "you know, i wouldnt have killed my father if i knew what followed would be so boring."

I have many other thoughts brewing in my brain but WHEW thats the gist of it.

PLEASE ASK ME MORE!!!

[morgana-ren]

something i wonder about for not ascended astarion. he spent those 200 years just eating rats and whatever cazador let him, he had to survive. and its not that he doesnt like being a vampire right? but he was surviving and suddenly with the tadpoles he has a lot less restrictions and abusive oversight.

once cazador is dead, i wonder how his bad days go remembering all that. how he handles dealing with what he is for the rest of eternity, since i doubt he had enough time to address trauma while it was happening. if he has any issues with drinking from people kind of like how he has issues with sleeping with others.

but maybe not since cazador wouldnt let him before and tav/companions are the first he drinks from, and not against his will. i dunno, just something i think about and wanna hug him over lol. sorry for the ramble

My guess? The same way we all live with trauma. In the way that, during the day, you are alive and you are breathing and you focus on the sun shining. You focus on the light in front of you, and not the memories flashing behind your eyes. You keep your claws away from your skin, and your mind from straying into the dark that waits, inky and twisting and sick, around every corner. Every scent. Every sight. You focus. You keep busy. You live, because it is all you can do. Your grief is a living thing that breathes and follows you, but it is polite and will sometimes stay quiet when there are other people speaking.

You do not think about the crisis that will come when night falls and all is quiet. You do not think about the taste of blood being so foreign even as you've needed it for years. About the things only your pillow knows. About the nightmares that will plague you, and the memories that etch themselves onto your soul like stone, and the way you still flinch at footsteps and voices. About the body that, even as it is yours, you cannot fully control because when your heart races or your eyes strain or the panic flows through your veins like a poison, you still cannot control it and even as the pain has stopped, your body remembers. It will always remember.

You do not think about the demon that peeks its head in from the closet door of the past uninvited every night, no matter how many times you lock it. The demon with their face and their memory and their touch and their claws and scent and it feels real even as you once spit on their corpse.

But Astarion doesn't really get that, does he? There is no sun shining. There is not even living. There is a man who is dead because his life was taken from him. A man who does not even know his own face because it was also taken from him. A man who cannot look to the light and the sun because his autonomy was taken from him. There is a man who cannot feel warmth because he will die again, for real this time, and it is the second death that hurts the most. The death you choose. The death you deny yourself. Where you must weigh your options and decide what it is all worth and take inventory of your own hoarding brain-- hoarding memories and sensations and feelings that no longer have a place and a home and a shelf. Repugnant trash you do not want in your house. You want them gone. But where do you put them?

His body is laden with scars he cannot see, cannot come to peace with, cannot face, even if he wants to. Phantom pain that will ache forever because scars that deep cause tissue damage and you feel them when you move and you breathe and it rains. His body was not his own. He will struggle to remember it is his body now. His skin. His scars. His body. His life. His choice. Said over and over like a mantra. To remember. To keep remembering.

He will slink around his own house like a ghost sometimes. Quiet and subtle. Deliberate. Even as it is his home, old habits die hard. He will awaken to noises you can't hear. He will expect him. He won't meditate. He will have questions that no one can answer because he is of a monstrous and forsaken kind that took him and abandoned him and left him with the questions of a child in a skin suit. He will flinch at touch-- even gentle, consensual touch meant to soothe him-- before he will relax. And one time that relax will become a deep, horrible, wrenching sob. And it will keep happening because that dam gets harder to build every time.

He won't want to talk. Sometimes he will. There's no rhyme or reason. It's like the tides of a sea that he rides and even he cannot control. All he knows is he is looking for some kind of land. Any kind of shelter. Something in the storm. All he can do is follow the currents and hope you follow.

He will have mood swings. He will crave touch and yet be repulsed by it. You must be careful. He will have to learn autonomy and consent all over again, and have to learn his own consent because that voice in his head is still there that tells him it is not his own. He will have to wrestle with the switch in his head because there is a cage over it with a key that he keeps forgetting he has. He will come to believe once again that he is a burden. That this is not your fault, and it's not fair you be expected to deal with it. He will suck it up. He will lash out. He will break down. He will cycle. He will do as mortal men do, even as he is not mortal.

He will be irrational and angry. He will feel sorrow at it. He will not understand his own feelings because he is not used to them being his feelings. What he wanted never mattered. They were not his feelings to have. And now he has too fucking many of them and they are falling around him like fucking leaves and severing and cracking into a billion more complex feelings and it doesn't matter how you heap them, it just turns into a giant mushy pile of what do you want from me? while they pile and pile and pile and rot and decay around you.

And it builds and it builds and it builds and it fills your lungs like fetid fucking water until you cannot breathe and it seeps out of your eyes and your very pores and infects everything around you.

And he has eternity to hoard. To cope. To feel. To find a way to stuff skeletons in the closet and organize his own head and learn to live in it again. To find a comfortable place in his own skin. He has an eternity. Whether he wants it or not. Yet another aspect taken from him. The choice to be natural. To die side by side with your partner of old age and contentment. He will outlive them, or he will curse them. There is no middle. Every time he looks at you, he will see the outline of your skull, and the fragility of your form. He will watch as you grow old and surpass him. He becomes your boyfriend to your husband to your son to your grandson. He is as beautiful as the day you met him. He tells you that you are too.

The world moves around him. He watches it through red eyes, a crimson veil between him and life, seeing everything, but unmoving with it. It passes him by. He cannot touch it, not truly. He is a man in a monster in a coffin. His comfort items will decay. His clothes will fray. His ring will break. His life will go on. His coffin will fill with bones. Just never his.

It will haunt him and hurt him and stalk him until he faces it. Because he is dead, he will need to learn to live again. He will need to learn to feel warmth. To see the sun where there is none. To cherish the fleeting and lament the dying-- two luxuries he does not have.

He will need to learn to fit his body back on every night like a glove and relearn how to puppet it. Learn that it is his. That it is wholly under his control. That no one gets to touch it if he does not say so. That he does not have to touch anyone. That no one is entitled to him. That he is entitled to no one. That this is good and okay and his body is not a weapon or a gift to be threatened or given. It is his home where he lives, and no one is allowed inside if he does not want it. He does not need to give a reason. It is not a fleabag hotel; it is a home-- his. The world has sucked him dry. He is the vampire, but in his home, you do not get to come if you are not invited.

He will need to learn he is not a burden. That it is okay to be angry. That it is okay to be furious. That it is okay to feel sorrow so heart-wrenching it feels as if your unbeating heart is being carved out with a knife even as there is no one wielding it. It is okay to scream and cry and shout. It is okay to need support. It is okay to collapse even as you have it. It is okay to lean on those who love you. It is okay to turn to Tav and just need something. Love, support, a hug-- silence.

Most of all, he needs to mourn. He needs to mourn his own death. Mourn his tragedy. Mourn his parents and the life he lived. Mourn the man he was. Mourn all that life has dealt him. Mourn every ounce of time he lost. Even as the hourglass stopped moving, the sand is still in the bottom. He can still feel the weight of it. Still sift his hands through it and feel it slip through his fingers. Mourn the man so that he can truly be born again.

He is shown that he is willing. Symbolically, he accepts this challenge. He feels certain. He feels ready.

And he can do it.

It will take time. It will take love and support from others and from himself. He needs to allow himself to be. Just to be Astarion. To delegate time to finding out who that really is. Who he really is. What he wants. What he is okay with. What he is ready for and what he doesn't like. He did not have a body and a soul for so long. He was a vessel. Now he is putting back pieces of himself together from where they were cast, stitching them together carefully, trying to figure out what they mean and trying to find pieces of himself to fill them with.

He has to accept himself. Become himself. He is Astarion the vampire spawn. He needs blood to live. This is an immutable truth. No amount of railing against it will stop this. You must live with your demons side by side, but you do not have to hold the devil's hand. You can accept them. And in time, they become more and more quiet. Less and less prominent. The shadow shrinks and allows room for light. You just have to be open to finding your own sun to bask in and find happiness in the smell of the leaves that pile around you endlessly. To swallow the water bits at a time rather than drowning. To learn to not love the scars, but accept them, and let other people see them and help you. Because he cannot see himself, but the friends that love him can, and like he once said: He could do worse.

I believe he will be okay. He has the strength. He just has to yank it out of himself.