#maybe we can get on the same page once we are more directly impacted

[littlestarlex]

hearing my political influencer roommate say "I won't promote Biden because he hasnt called for a ceasefire to the genocide, but I am still voting for him" is so genuinely tone deaf and stupid and it alone convinced me I am DEFINITELY not voting for that stupid motherfucker (I already wasn't going to, but it confirmed I was making the right call)

the sentiment I keep hearing is "as long as it isn't Trump" but it's so frustrating to think, for some people, Biden is as bad as Trump, for some people his lack of action on major policy change has altered their lives permanently in ways than will never be undone

"well Trump is going to enact a national abortion ban, doesn't that scare you?" sure, but I'm scared right now for the very real people currently unable to get the Healthcare they need because of loss of roe v. wade, for some people that ban is already in place and they're facing very real consequences of it as we speak

I'm scared for my friends, my family, myself, and all the people I may never know who are being impacted RIGHT NOW by the democratic presidency we're currently under

just because I am not currently impacted does not mean it shouldn't be a priority, just because it doesn't directly impact me doesn't mean I should just let it go

they cannot have my vote just because they're blue, just because they pacify us with small scale wins while continuing to fund the very things that keep us from being in a position of power

shit in the government can take a long time, I get it, but clearly they can move quick when it's something they all want, like ripping the power from the people and silencing voices that want genuine change

they all want the same thing, just because democrats aren't up there screaming on stage doesn't make them any less evil than republicans

[blueeofsl]

Okay so this is going to be a pretty long analysis on @somerandomdudelmao ‘s most recent update… Will have to be split into multiple posts because of pictures

Been staring at the post for a while and damn,,, imagine going from dying in an unforgiving wasteland to waking up in what I can guess is a soft mattress with a healthy portion of sheets and blankets. Like those are absolute opposites in terms of comfort

The fact that Leo wakes up with unfocused eyes (compared to his brothers, who almost immediately shoot up), tells us that he’s still expecting himself to be back in that apocalypse.

Also the frown he has in the middle panel, it’s probably just his face relaxing, but we see that it immediately goes to a frown. An “ugh, im so exhausted why am I awake?” Sort of expression. Which kinda continues to show in the last panel of this first page.

And in that entire time, Leo’s eyes never fully focus. Because he isn’t expecting anything good to happen for him. So why should he even try at this point when there’s no one left to save?

~~~~~

Which brings us to the next page. Zooming in, we can see that Leo is staring at the back of Donnie’s shell. Im guessing it takes him a moment to realize what he’s looking at because we get enough time to see Donnie struggle to stay awake. And knowing Donnie, this hints to Leo that this isn’t some sort of normal hallucination.

We can also see that Leo is on a soft bed, and is being consistently monitored by Donnie. I am wondering what Donnie is working on though. Maybe checking Leo’s vitals? A new prosthetic for Leo? Or maybe, for once, allowing himself to start to plan on a new invention. Something that doesn’t directly involve with whether the resistance will survive the next day or not. He shows this sort of stubbornness to keep himself awake until he’s sure that Leo is okay.

In the last panel we see Leo finally perk up as he crains his neck back to really get a good look at his twin. He probably notices how Donnie’s shell looks a bit wider, his arms a bit stronger. But maybe hasn’t fully recognized it yet. This is also probably where he lets his vision come into focus, and becomes more aware of his surroundings because oh shit, I’m not dying on packed dirt any more.

~~~~~

Moving on to page 3, Leo reaches out to Donnie to see if he’s real. These poses remind me of the first episode of the comics.

(Episode 1, part 7) Here we see Leo do pretty much the exact same hand motion as his tiny, little self. Which kinda tells us that Leo is moving purely on instinct, on emotion. His mind telling him to seek for that sort of comfort.

When he falls in the last panel of the recent comic, I feel like it becomes some sort of wakeup call for him. Because the fall from the bed to the floor is pretty far from what we see in page 2. And the noise of his shell hitting the floor was probably pretty loud too. Enough to scare Donnie out of what ever he was working on.

Would also like to take a moment to look at Leo’s scars, specifically the one on the shell. I realized it’s the scar from when Donnie had to forcefully pull his shell together by screws and wire. (Part 2 of Episode 11)

The fact that that scar is still on Leo’s shell shows us that it was an impactful moment for him (the revived turtles so far have shown that the scars/features that stay are those they think a lot about or have an emotional attachment to). He was lucky at that time. Because the rubble that caused that injury could have easily killed him. A wrong crack/break in the shell could have left him immobile for the rest of the war. But that’s where Donnie comes in because he knows that Leo would hate that.

The reason why the scar is so big on Leo’s shell now shows how much impact it had on his mind. At least that’s my guess…

~~~~~

Moving onto Page 4, we get a good view of Leo’s expression in all panels. First one shows pain, a wince. His arm looks to have twitched towards himself in order to protect his head. It could have also twitched because of Donnie’s sudden yell to him.

The second panel shows surprise. Because his twin is picking him off the floor. Symbolically speaking, this could mean that his family is here to pick him up now, to carry him over to better times.

This surprise is also towards the fact that Donnie is able to lift Leo when before, right on the day Donnie dies, it was Leo who was picking up Donnie.

Also notice how in this page, we don’t see Donnie’s face at all. Even when Donnie is lifting Leo up in the third panel, we just see the confusion on Leo’s face. And also, perhaps, a bit of fear. Maybe he was fearing whether or not this was a dream.

But heres the thing. Many have noticed the parallel of Donnie and Leo switching positions in who is carrying who. But I noticed another parallel in this page.

First panel in page 4 looks nearly identical to this page of Leo dying here.

When realizing this, the parallel just made that page so much more emotional to me.

Because Leo was expecting to be brought back to the apocalypse in his head.

~~~~~

Moving onto page 5, we get another good view of the scar on Leo’s shell. First panel though, love the Donnie face squish. There was no way he was gonna just let his twin sit on the cold hard floor when theres a bed right there.

This might be looking to much into it, but in the first panel, it looks like Leo is shaking too.

We also see that Donnie and Leo are the same size now, when before, Leo was larger than Donnie when the soft shell was sick.

The second panel again shows the emotion Leo is going through. To me, it screams “is this real? I can’t believe it. How is this happening?” And we can see that Donnie’s grip on Leo is strong and firm while Leo seems to sorta cling/melt into his twin.

In the third panel, Donnie is telling Leo to sit still. Perhaps this is because of how badly Leo is shaking, or the fact that he had just fallen out of bed. Either way, what seems as a command for a shitty patient has another meaning; that Leo is okay. He’s going to be taken care of, he just has to let his family take care of him. Just like how he took care of them and so many other people.

~~~~~

Page 6, We see Leo’s expression again, and the way his arm is still reached out from Donnie pulling it off his shoulder. It’s full of surprise but theres not much fear being shown except for the hollowness in his eyes.

Leo still doesn’t fully believe all of this is real. Then Donnie goes and starts moving around him, checking what’s left of his arm (some people are saying that it’s the first thing donnie checked. Also wondering if this could be him planning on a new prosthetic for Leo), and what I can guess is Donnie checking his heartbeat (the little white ninpo rectangle thing near Leo’s heart).

For Leo, this is quite overwhelming. He lets Donnie do his thing, but it’s been years since he’s seen his brother be so active around him. He shows signs of nervousness too, the wobbly line for his lips, and the way that his arm is tucked towards his middle, and his knees slightly pulled up and together. In that moment, he’s trying to make himself smaller.

Going back to scars again, notice the scarring on his neck. It’s the same injury from when he went to Donnie’s lab for guidance after almost getting his head bitten off by a krang dog. It’s another scar that’s left a large impact on Leo’s mind. Perhaps part of it is because of the krang dog, but another part I think is because of him yelling for Donnie.

~~~~~

THIS IS PART 1 OF ANALYSIS!

PART 2

PART 3

[alena-reblobs]

Trigun Bookclub Trimax Vol9 Par2

Vol01: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3  | Vol02: Part 1 | Part 2

Trimax: Vol01 Part 1 Vol01 Part 2 | Vol02 Part 1 Vol02 Part 2 | Vol 03 Part 1 | Vol03 Part2 | Vol04 Part1 | Vol04 Part2 | Vol05 | Vol06 | Vol07 | Vol08 Part1 | Vol08 Part2 | Vol09 Part1 | Vol09 Part2

And next part!

Chapter 5:

I assume this is a time where Wolfwood really really didn't want to pull the trigger. Because as much as Livio has changed, he still once was a part of his family.

Wolfwood, spying Chapel with the eyes of a hunter. (I like to say "hunter" instead of "killer" as a hunter, much like a wolf, can also be someone who only kills to protect? Maybe? I'm trying to make sense but it's late and I'm mostly spilling thoughts that come to my mind as I read these pages again)

Looks like this show of supreme fighting instinct is smth Chapel is proud of. Ugh, Wolfwood is no longer a part of you! You have no right to be proud of what he does or what he has become!

No super cure without some nasty side effects. Or a price, the price being that they itselves take a toll on the body.

Oh the way the light is set, the composition, this is a very beautiful panel! Hmm I like when we get tone gradiant from dark to light!

Razlo!!! Teheee. Also what the hell is the deal with that third armm?? I want to know the logistics, how is it connected to the body? Can it rotate 360°?

Chapter 6:

Farewell Nicholas my ass that man is not done yet and you still have to pay for what you did to him, old man.

Oh I think I got it just now that they sacrificed one of the three dudes in order to distract Wolfwood with his blood and flesh. Best employee of the month, but at what price!

A Wolfwood in the wild will spread all its limbs far apart to appear more big and threatening.

First of all: oh dear oh dear oh dear. Second: I dore how Nightow draws so dynamic, like in these moments with quick movement, he draws the limbs without too much care for the joints. Stressing the speed and direction of movement by having the limbs flail behind and also kinda angling them like the speedlines. AND making it more dynamic by adding perspective, cause the hands are bigger and just a bit in the foreground!

D'awwwww he looks like a happy little vampire!

No stop don't give me Wolfwood thoughs, they will make me sad :((

Vash, in Wolfwood's mind: standing upright and proud and a smile on his face. Me, the reader: *bawling internally*

oh oh oh in that moment he was saying to Vash what Chapel once taught him!

It is a crime that I'm reading these pages while stopping in between to comment so I'll read these first and comment afterwards. The impact of Wolfwood's thoughts is so so strong. Let me just...post the rest of the chapter in one go.

You really, really need to read the last chapters of vol9 in one go and directly start with vol10 to get the best feeling and flow of storytelling. Complete quietness around you or some music playing, but something that makes you focus only on these words and the emotions and ....everything.

And oh my god oh my I just tried to get behind the meaning of the last sentence and I might have found something. Please look at the lyrics for "Time" by Pink Floyd. The last verse especially but also, the whole song fits??? I can no longer listen to this the same way:

"Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town Waiting for someone or something to show you the way

Tired of lying in the sunshine, staying home to watch the rain You are young and life is long, and there is time to kill today And then one day you find ten years have got behind you No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking Racing around to come up behind you again The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older Shorter of breath and one day closer to death

Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way The time is gone, the song is over Thought I'd something more to say

Home Home again I like to be here When I can

When I come home Cold and tired It's good to warm my bones Beside the fire

Far away Across the field Tolling on the iron bell Calls the faithful to their knees To hear the softly spoken magic spell"

Also what a beautiful end note to end this review with.

[midgardianweasley]

Keep you safe

Keep you safe

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Avenger!reader

Summary: When the civil war breaks out among the team, what happens when you find yourself and your girlfriend on opposite sides of the fight?

Warnings: Extremely minor cursing, angst, injury, ends in fluff

Word Count: 1.8k words

Message/ask if you’d like to be added to the taglist <3

Requests are open!

“Vision, you can’t keep her prisoner here” I announced to what seemed like a brick wall. The S.H.I.E.L.D. meeting was only this morning and already it felt like the team was beginning to drift. Tony and Steve were fighting, not being able to agree on where they stand regarding the Sokovia Accords and whether we should sign our rights away. Wanda, not being a US citizen and having been a big part of the incident in Sokovia, has been put under Vision’s watch for protection. But from what i’ve seen, I think Wanda can protect herself just fine.

“It’s not imprisonment, Y/N, this is for her safety.”

“Safety? She’s fully capable of walking to the shops on her own.”

“I think some members of the team would disagree, Nata-”

“Don’t, Vision. Please.” I sighed, rubbing my forehead, the stress going straight to my temples upon remembering the events from this morning with my girlfriend.

Nat and I had just walked out of the meeting room, thoughts flooding both of our heads. We were exhausted, the emergency meeting not giving us enough time to wake up with a coffee before having to be fully functional. My head was resting on her shoulder, her head on top of mine as we stood in an abandoned corridor, revelling in the peace and quiet. It was a few minutes before one of us decided to speak up.

“You okay, голубка?” She whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of my head before returning to her previous position.

“Mhmm, I think so. My head is officially fried though and it’s not even 9am yet.”

“We’ll get some coffee in us soon.”

“I think we’ve earned it” I mumbled, earning a slight chuckle from the both of us, returning back to the silence for only a couple of minutes before a thought crossed my mind.

“I feel bad for Wanda. She must feel terrible.”

“I know. Hopefully this whole Accords business can be of help.”

“Well, that would be nice, but we’re obviously not signing that.” An airy laugh left my lips, amused at the idea of signing away any freedom we could have for ourselves. I felt Nat’s body go rigid beside me, suddenly feeling tense. I pulled away slightly and looked up to see a frown taking over her features.

“You’re not going to sign?” She spoke, suddenly sounding more awake, albeit still having a gentle tone, but I could feel the disbelief behind her words.

“I wasn’t planning on it, no. Are you?”

“I feel like it would be a good idea. Maybe we need a little more guidance to go about our missions.”

“This isn't guidance, Nat. This is essentially locking us away just without the bars.”

“It’s protection.”

“It’s losing our freedom!” I bluntly responded, almost shocked that we weren’t on the same page about this. We both stood across from each other now, arms crossed and staring into each other's eyes, all tiredness beforehand gone and replaced with fire.

“I need some air” She groaned, walking away towards the exit, signalling the end of that conversation.

“Nat-”

“I’ll see you at home, okay?” Not giving me a chance to respond, having walked out the door before I could utter a word. I guess coffee is the least of my problems now.

Lost in my daydream, I hadn’t even noticed that Clint had walked in and was currently fighting Vision. Wait, Clint?

“Clint? I thought you retired?”

“Ah nice to have you back.” He choked, currently caught in a headlock with Vision. I stood next to Wanda, the two of us sharing a look of confusion. “We need to go, Cap needs us.”

“You can’t overpower me, Clint.” Vision spoke, still holding his grip.

“I know i can’t, but she can”

I looked beside me once again and saw Wanda beginning to use her powers, and before I knew it, Vision had fallen to the ground..and further until we could no longer see him.

“We need to go” The archer rushed, taking Wanda by the hand and leading her outside. I was yet to be clued in on what exactly was going on, but I knew one thing, this couldn’t be good.

---

It was absolute chaos everywhere. Steve, much like Tony, had recruited a small team of his own, some familiar faces, some new, the ant guy was pretty cool. However, there hadn’t been much time to admire the different skill sets and powers that had been brought to the table before both sides had run towards each other. Especially considering seeing the recognisable assassin on the other side had brought on a wave of sickness, fighting her was the last thing I wanted to do.

While Bucky had taken to fighting who I assumed to be Blank Panther and Sam was in the air, I’d stuck to helping Steve, not wanting to get involved in the fight Clint was having with Natasha. This teenager had started shooting webs at Captain, and while I know he was on the opposite side, I had to admit, he was pretty good at fighting.

“He also said to go for your legs” He chuckled, again shooting webs at the supersoldier and holding him back from retrieving his shield.

“Hey Spidey” I called, gaining his attention.

“Hi”

“Might wanna drop the Captain, yeah?”

“I can’t. I gotta impress Mr Stark”

“Look, this isn’t your fight, you don’t know what’s going on” I tried to reason, falling onto deaf ears, or just stubborn, as he then shot his webs at me and tried to pull. His eyes shrunk in confusion as he couldn’t flip me, my power of immobility coming in handy.

“Why-” He groaned, still trying to flip me. I lifted my hands, grabbed the webs and flung him into one of the loading crates that were scattered around, my super strength making the impact a lot harsher, but not enough to cause major injury.

“Thanks Y/N” Steve spoke, a quick nod of approval was shared before I caught a glance of another fight going on. Wanda’s holding a crate, trying to take someone flying above it out, completely oblivious to Vision starting to come towards her. Looking down slightly, I saw who was directly underneath.

“Shit” I mumbled, running as fast as I could towards them, avoiding gunfire and punches along the way.

“Language!”

“Sorry! Jeez” I directed towards the man now running in a different direction.

Vision was much closer to them than I was, no matter how quickly my feet took me. It was no use trying to warn Wanda, I wouldn’t get there in time. I had to go with plan B.

“Nat! Move!”

She quickly turned and caught sight of me, giving me a confused glare that didn’t last long before I pushed her away from where she was standing, out of harm's way.

“What the hell Y/-” She hadn’t managed to finish her sentence before her eyes widened in horror at the large crate suddenly falling from Wanda’s hold and onto me. My arms lifted quickly to hold it, slightly wobbling due to not being in the centre of it.

“Is there anything behind me?”

“Wha-”

“Is there anything behind me?!” I spoke more urgently, not knowing how much longer I could hold it.

“No, no you’re clear.” Natasha responded, I thanked her silently with a nod.

‘Okay. you’ve got this. One. Two-’ I thought to myself.

With the remaining strength I could have gathered, I bent down slightly and pushed, sending the metal hurling upwards while I ran forward. Overestimating how high i’d thrown it, the bitter reality hit me, quite literally as it fell onto my leg, sending me face first towards the ground.

“Wanda!” Was all I could hear before I felt my head placed in someone’s lap and the world went black.

---

My head pounding like a hammer had been a lovely wake up call, followed by a throbbing pain in my leg which I'd looked down to see was lying along a row of pillows. My eyes darted around the room and I recognised the photo on the bedside table beside me. It was a photo of Natasha and I standing in the rain laughing at a joke we can’t remember anymore, but it must’ve been funny according to the huge smiles on our faces. The love in our eyes was enough to make galaxies jealous.

A knock on the door had interrupted my train of thought, opening before I had a chance to respond, Natasha walked in, a guilty look taking over her face.

“Hi”

“Hey. You okay?” I questioned, earning a smile and a scoff to come out of The Black Widow’s mouth.

“Am I okay? Really?”

“I-”

“You ask me if i’m okay when you’re lying there with a broken leg and just woken up from being knocked out, because you decided to throw yourself into danger.”

“You had a tonnes worth of metal about to fall on you. Forgive me if i didn’t want a squished girlfriend.” I defended myself, not entirely certain on how this is turning into being my fault.

“You could have died”

“But I didn’t”

“But you could’ve, Y/N!”

“Love-”

“I can’t lose you” Her voice broke. Only then had I managed to really take a look at her. Her eyes had clouded over, her hair was all over the place, her nose running slightly. A pang of guilt hit me, not knowing that my action had affected her so much.

“Can you come here? Please?” She hesitated, but soon made her way round to the other side of the bed and sat herself down, making herself comfortable in my arms that I held open for her, hands immediately going to run through her hair. Small sniffles could be heard in the otherwise silent room, each one having a kiss pressed against her head in response.

After a couple of minutes, the silence was broken again.

“I’m sorry, moya lyubov, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just wanted to keep you safe.”

She turned her head up slightly to look at me, a small smile playing on her lips

“I know. i just panicked. I want you to be safe too.”

“I’m okay. I’m here. I promise.” I kissed her head again. “How does a bath and a movie sound?” A small sigh left her lips at the suggestion.

“You’ll join?”

“I’ll join”

A small but passionate kiss was exchanged, followed by a few quick pecks before the redhead walked off towards our bathroom, the sound of running water filling the air not long after.

No matter the mission, the fight, the argument or the disagreements, we’ll always protect one another. We don’t need the Sokovia Accords for that.

taglist: @the-dumbass-that-throws-knives

[tommysparker]

Never Forget You [Chapter 3]

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Jedi!Reader

A/N: hey y’all! thank you for your patience with this chapter. enjoy!! :) [also totally didn’t have this in my drafts then forget to post earlier pfftttt whaaaatt?]

Warnings: angst with a tiny amount of fluff. anakin finally makes his debut in this series. it gets better just stay with me. long italic paragraphs = flashbacks

Anakin Skywalker had witnessed many things over the years. 

Giant beasts? At least once a week. Sith Lords? Becoming too common. Droid armies? All year long. Looking death in the eye? Simply another day in the life of a Jedi. 

Nothing could ever have prepared him for the sight he was currently witnessing. 

Obi-Wan Kenobi, his Master, The Negotiator, the Jedi Council’s most prized Jedi…sulking.

It has been a full week since You returned to the Jedi Temple and Anakin couldn’t help to think his former Master’s mood and your arrival were connected. He was vaguely aware of your past friendship, only hearing bits and pieces of the adventures you had together as Padawans. 

During his days under Obi-Wan’s apprenticeship he would often hear about how “a wise Jedi I once knew” would do certain things. He wanted to know more about this oh-so-great Jedi, however, any time the young boy asked his Master would always brush him off with a mournful look in his eyes.  

He didn’t understand at the time but now he’s beginning to piece together that perhaps there was something more between the two of you. 

“You think Master Y/l/n and Master Kenobi were courting?” 

“Keep your voice down, Snips,” Anakin hushed.

“Sorry, sorry. But Master,” Ahsoka lowers her voice, “what led you to that conclusion? I’ve hardly seen them together since Master Y/l/n came back. What makes you think they could be lovers?” 

“That’s just it, Ahoska. They’ve been avoiding each other like the Rakghoul plague. Obi-Wan told me they were such good friends, and now that they’re back they can’t stand to be in the same room as each other? I don’t buy it.” Anakin looked back to where Obi-Wan sat with Commander Cody, no doubt brainstorming new battle tactics and liberation plans. 

“So what do you suppose we do? Set them up or something?” The look her Master gave her made her regret her words the moment they left her mouth. 

“Come on, Snips. It’s a good idea. We get them to stay in the same room so they have no choice but to confront each other and talk things out! It’s genius.” Anakin smiled, his eyes still on his former Master. He had a feeling if Obi-Wan were to find out about this plan he would be in for a major lecture but he couldn’t bring himself to care at the moment. He couldn’t stand to see the old man look so miserable, not if he can do anything about it. 

Ahsoka crossed her arms and followed her Master’s gaze. Something was clearly different about her Grand-Master. He had put his full attention into ending the war, which wasn’t new. However, she could tell something was off. He no longer came out to the landing zone to greet returning fighters, stayed away from the meditation and training centers as well as the Jedi Archives which was the most off-putting observation considering that was where he spent most of his time.

Anytime someone needed to find Obi-Wan Kenobi, the first place they would check was the ancient history section of the Jedi Archives. 

“I don’t know why you find so much interest in these old books Y/n/n,” Obi-Wan complained from across the table. “Can’t we go practice our lightsaber skills instead?” 

You smiled. “Nuh uh, mister. If I won the wager you promised to sit with me during my reading time. Now shush, and read.” You pushed the unopened textbook toward the pouting Padawan. “Maybe you’ll actually learn something.” 

Obi-Wan stuck his tongue out in a childish manner, sighing dramatically when you gave him a certain look and reluctantly opened the cover and began to read Tales of The Old Republic. 

Safe to say from that point onward, Obi-Wan would join your daily Archive visits with zero complaints. 

You close the book, careful to make sure no pages fell out and gently push it back into its place on the shelf. Using the force, you carefully push the ladder you were currently standing on over to the next column and begin nitpicking through the array of old texts. 

It took a few days for you to settle in and readjust to the Jedi Temple life. Once you had, however, things quickly took a turn. 

Master Yoda requested that you help train some of the younglings who were having trouble advancing into the next stages of becoming a Jedi. In all honesty, you much rather have had the freedom to roam for at least one more week, but the new role presented an excuse to not be around a certain blue-eyed Jedi. 

“Looking for something?” 

The voice startled you, causing you to jump and lose your balance on the ladder. You yelp as you begin to fall towards the ground, bracing yourself for the hash impact and the bruises that would add to the collection on your side still currently healing.  

Instead, you feel a pair of arms catch you, one under your back and the other behind your knees in a classic bridal style. The hold felt secure instantly, and you instinctively clung to the tunic of your savior. You look up to thank the person for preventing any injuries, but the blue eyes staring back at you made your mind go blank. 

Obi-Wan stared back, unsure of what to say. This was the closest he has been to you since you left a decade ago. He longed to have you in his arms, to hug you, to regain that safety net you provided he knew he could always fall back on.

“Um...thank you, General.” It came out as more of a question, your mind still reeling from almost falling and also the fact that the man who you had been actively avoiding just happened to be in the same place you spent hours of your youth together. 

“Obi-Wan, please. No need for formalities, darling.” The old nickname slipped out, and he was about to apologize when he noticed the light blush that spread across your face. Perhaps not everything about you has changed. 

“Right...Obi-Wan. Well, I’ll be on my way then,” You rushed, trying to pass by him but he stopped you once again by the call of your name. 

“Y/n/n’s wait. Whatever game you’re playing, frankly I am not a fan of it.” Obi-Wan crossed his arms and furrowed his eyebrows. 

“What are you talking about?” You turned around and looked at him confused. 

“You were the one who summoned me here,” he stretched his arms out, “here I am and now you’re trying to run away again. I hardly think that’s fair.” He was beginning to get frustrated. He came in with his heart on his sleeve, ready to finally talk to you after so long and find out why you’ve been keeping your distance. Now, all he felt was betrayal and irritation at the ongoing dance you insist on doing around each other. 

He preferred to dance like you did in your youth, but alas this was nothing but another sign he needs to get mind out of the past.  

You scoffed lightly. “Again? What is that supposed to mean exactly?” You knew exactly what he meant, but you didn’t want to admit it. You’ve been denying it for ten years and Force be damned if you’d admit it now. 

“You’ve been avoiding me since your return--” You open your mouth to protest but he ignores you and continues “--and then you send the youngling to bring me here, only to try to flee upon my arrival,” He frowns, lifting his elbow and resting it on his remaining crossed arm. “I know our history can make things...difficult in the present time,” He glanced around cautiously as he spoke,”but I would appreciate it if we make an agreement simply to not speak from now on. No more games.” 

You blinked, head tilting slightly as you waited for him to finish. “Obi-Wan, I didn’t ask for you to come here. Nor would I ever involve younglings in personal matters.” He should know that, you thought. But should he really? 

His face fell from annoyance to embarrassment, his arms falling to his sides. “Oh.” He wasn’t sure what to do now. It was his own fault for getting his hopes up. I should have known better. 

You purse your lips and nodded slowly. “Well, I’m glad we at least came to an agreement. Goodbye, General Kenobi.” You took your leave, forcing yourself not to look back as you felt his eyes watching your figure. 

Obi-Wan let out a frustrated sigh, knowing he just ruined any and all changes of reconnecting with you. In his defense, however, you were the one avoiding his attempts at friendly conversation and refusing to meet and make up for lost time.  

Still, something didn’t feel right about this. 

“What the kriff was that?” 

Ah, there’s that something. “Anakin, please tell me this was not your doing.” 

Anakin smiled guilty, Ahsoka coming out from behind the bookshelf to stand next to her Master. 

“It was Snips' idea.” Anakin shrugged, flinching when he felt her punch his arm. “Ow!”

“You were the one who came up with the plan, and now look! Master Y/l/n and Master Kenobi will never get together--” Ahoska stops herself, realizing she said too much. “Oh no.” 

“I beg your pardon?” Obi-Wan looks at them both incredulously. “First of all, Master Y/l/n and I are simply…” he wanted to say friends, but even that was a reach at this point, “acquaintances. We knew each other in the past, and in the past our friendship shall stay. As for ‘getting together’, you both know very well any implication of that goes directly against the Jedi Code.” He crossed his arms tightly as he scolded. 

“I can tell you harbour feelings for them, Obi-Wan. You don’t need to lie to us.” 

“Whatever feelings I may or may not have for Y/n are unrelated. You must understand your responsibilities as a Jedi. No matter what emotional sacrifice we must make.” He made a point to look at Anakin at the end, knowing he won’t follow the implication but at least hoping he’ll get the message.     

“We’re sorry, Master.” Ahsoka looked down in shame not at what they had tried to achieve, but at the cost and clear damage they caused. 

Obi-Wan sighed, running a hand over his beard before resting it on her shoulder. “It’s alright young one. You meant no harm. Perhaps some things are better left forgotten.” 

Oh, if only it were that simple. 

A Padawan approached the three of them quickly. “Excuse me, Master Yoda sent me to tell you he and Master Y/l/n are waiting for you all in the council room.” 

Of course, these things never are. 

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heres a box to put your heart pieces in  -> []  :) 

Taglist: @queenariesofnarnia @dwarfplanet69 @katsukink @blondekel77 @generousrunawaydonut @fandomtrashwhore @fortheloveofaqueenfan @mrskenobi19 @mellowstatesmanhandsempath @hotleaf-juice @emiijemii @neji85 @doctor-warthrop @ayamenimthiriel @lizzy-95 @lovelylostminds 

[writella]

Around and Around and Around

Pairing: Luke Patterson x reader

Requested? Yes! My first finished request! Thank you for the idea anon. Original ask: Could you do a present day... Alive!Luke x reader fic where him and his girlfriend (the reader) are just trying to spend some alone time together at one of Carrie’s parties? (I’m so sorry I didn’t make it Carrie’s party anon, I forgot.)

Summary: It’s a New Years Eve bash! The gangs all there, but the only thing Luke wants to do is spend time with his girlfriend. Unfortunately though, his friends constantly need their help which causes them to lose each other in the crowd. Around and around and around they constantly go... Can Luke meet up with her in time for a New Years Kiss? We shall see, my friends. We shall see.

Word Count: :)

Warnings: Kissing? Two curse words? I don’t think any of that counts. Oh! Over explaining? Neediness? An over use of the same words?

A/N: Hello everyone! IT IS A CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS MIRACLE! I finally finished a new fic. I really hope you enjoy it. I think I did a little too much, but this request just got my head turning and included the whole gang, so I just couldn’t help but give them all their own little moments! I had fun and I hope you do too. I’m taking you on a bit of a rollercoaster here, I will admit, but don’t worry though, I think I gave it a good ending.... You tell me.

“Y/N!”

“Y/N?”

“Luke?”

“Where are you?”

“Luuuke!”

“Luke!

“LUKE, COME LOOK!”

“Y/N, I need you.”

“Her shoe broke!”

“Luke, did you see his dog? It’s so cute! And he even likes pizza!”

“I don’t think you’re supposed to give pizza to a dog, Reg.”

“Well it wasn’t chocolate… Wait where’d he go? Wanna help me find him?”

“Well can she wear yours? Do you have an extra pair?”

“Where are they?”

Hey, Luke?!” 

“Y/N?!”

Boom the bedroom door slammed shut, and an out of breath Luke and his girlfriend, Y/N, filed in with a sigh: “Finally,” Luke said, his eyebrows and the corner of his lips rising with excitement. Throughout the hour and forty minus they had spent at the party thus far, they had found corners, almost empty areas, and even tall trees in the backyard, but none were as private as this. 

Still standing close to the door, Y/N looked around the walls that glittered with posters of rock bands and athletes. “Do you really think we should be in here? It is the birthday person’s room. Maybe we should be nice and leave it alone.” 

“When you throw a party you get what you get,” Luke reasoned, a hint of humor tracing throughout his words. “People travel, and we’re not going to do anything crazy on the kid’s blue basketball sheets if that’s what you’re worried about.” He ended, teasing Nick, the party host. 

She softly gave him an ‘alright,’ waiting for him to make his next move. Though they had been thrown around by their friends plenty of times by now tonight, the night was still young, and she knew Luke was adamant on spending time with her. Even more so, it was her first party after living in Los Angeles for almost a year now. (She was a Molina from Julie’s father’s side.) Back home she didn’t have the friend group that she had now, nor did she have someone like Luke specifically in her life as a significant other. After all this time in high school not experiencing these regular social events, a party— especially at this large of a house— seemed daunting, but as always Luke made it seem, as he always does, like it was the most spectacular adventure you couldn’t miss. Apprehension and excitement filled her spirit for what was to come of tonight. 

Following his gaze as she watched him survey the room, Luke’s eyes fell most notably on Nick’s guitars. “God, I wish I had this many.” 

“He definitely has the collection,” Y/N agreed,  still wondering what they were going to do, “but you’ve got like four, right?”

“Half of those were Bobby’s, and the acoustic is the one my parents got me… way back when, so really I only scrounged up enough money once in my life for one electric of my own.”

“So two. Still more than most.” She gave him a sympathetic smile, messing up his hair a little bit while doing so. He rubbed his head into her palm, enjoying the feeling.

There was a wonder in his eyes as he looked at the guitar rack that Y/N found quite charming. “Can’t believe he could spend all his time with these babies and he decides to balance it with sports.”

“I guess we all have our hobbies… but honestly I can’t believe we’re using this moment to ourselves to stare at guitars.” She laughs, “I’m just saying! This is what you wanted!” She corrects herself, “They are beautiful guitars though.”

“Yeah, you’re right. One of them could barge in any minute now,” Luke says, moving closer to Y/N till her back leans against the door. His fingers trace her jaw, then the side of her neck, ending as he swirled one finger around the tips of her hair. “And I could be looking at a much prettier sight.”

“Stop,” she blushed. Y/N was fine with tending to all her friends needs. She enjoyed being the first one Julie, Flynn, and now even Alex or Reggie went to for advice or help. Besides running the jatp social media account and co-running their YouTube page, making her friends feel better was what made her feel needed, but she had to admit, she liked this too. 

As they traveled backwards to the door, Luke pecked her lips a few times, then the corners of her mouth, then doing both again making her giggle and move her head to either side his lips fell. Finally, he moved centimeters back, looking in her eyes, ghosting her lips, “Stop doin’ what? Tellin’ the truth?” 

The rosy color on her face became more prominent. Her eyes traced between his own emeralds and his smile— his face made her mind fill with wonder. It was so bright, so positive, so warm, so close to her own. She could stay there with him, looking at her so endearingly, forever.

“Y/N?!” 

“Ow!” she screeched as Flynn pushed the door open on her leaning stance, bopping her head on the wood. 

“Oh my god, sorry!” Flynn gritting her teeth with worry, a fist coming to cover her mouth. “So yeah, ha ha,” the girl tried to build some relief, “Well there you two are!”

Luke grabbed the side of Y/N’s head, placing his hand over her own that covered where the impact landed, “You okay?” 

“Yeah…” She sighed, she was more concerned about whatever Flynn had to say. 

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere. I need you, like for real this time.” Flynn said, her voice filled with urgency. 

“Haven’t you needed her and looked for her ‘like’ everywhere three times tonight already?” Luke argued, a little disgruntled that their first truly private moment got interrupted in the matter of minutes.

“Was I talking to you, Patterson?” Flynn retorted, head tilted with a closed smirk on her face. “No, the answer is no.”

“You didn’t have to say the answer, okay? Got the gist.” His movements became dorkier by the second, his fingers coming to his face. “It was rhetorical- I knew that!” 

“Wow, learned that big boy word from your girlfriend?”

“Big boy?! I- That’s not even-“ before Luke went on, Y/N cut in: “Alright,” she lifted her hand, “What happened, Flynn? What do you need?”

“It’s Julie-“

“Don’t tell me she broke another shoe. I don’t have an extra-extra pair.”

“No.” Flynn’s eyes widened, “I actually- I don’t know what it is. She just told me to get you and come to her together.” The girl sighed, “She looked sad.” 

“Oh,” Y/N said, a frown coming to her face. A sad Julie is a Julie that should never be in this world. Other than thinking about the absence of her mother, Y/N’s cousin knew how to smile even when things got tough, so if she was feeling down now, and it was evident, it must’ve been important. 

“Yeah. So come? Like now?” Flynn grabbed Y/N’s hand and Y/N looked at her own opposite hand that was currently attached to Luke’s, trailing her eyes up to his face. 

“Well, I’ll just go too.” He insisted, “I want to help Julie, and,” He spoke directly to Y/N, “I don’t mind.”

“She didn’t ask for you.” Flynn snapped back. 

“It’ll be fine.” Y/N decided, “It’s not like we all don’t know her well anyway, right?”

“Yeah, let's go. And then we can just get back, hopefully. I want to spend tonight with you.” Luke said that last part more softly, but apparently not quietly enough. 

“Oh god!” Flynn vexed. “Haven’t you spent all week stuck to her mouth?”  Through snickers she said, “Let her come up for some air, bruv.” Then, letting go of Y/N's hand as she turns, leading the couple to the staircase, she continued: “And really you should be relaxing all those throat muscles or whatever. I've got you in two open mic night cafes next week and that kids party at the restaurant tomorrow, AND on Sunday Julie said she wanted to record that new song for the YouTube channel.” She slapped the side of her hand to the inside of the other, creating a chopping effect, “We got things to do! I’m trying to make sure you guys stay safe and have fun, but we shouldn’t be here all night.”

Luke rolled his eyes, as much as he loved playing, he hated being bossed around like this. “It's New Year’s Eve!” He complained, yet there was still a hint of playfulness in his voice. “Mind you, this is being said by the girl who agreed to DJ at this party.”

“I didn’t agree! I got reeled into it— Difference, see! This kid comes out of nowhere to bring me onto his home stage— man, he’s rich—- and asks me if I could change the tracks, put something fun on. How am I supposed to say no? It is his birthday and everything that was on before was terrible!”

“That we can agree on,” Luke noted with a laugh.

Y/N added on, after her long silence of listening to the two go back and forth, “You finally got everyone dancing.”

“I did! Thank you!” Flynn appreciated the acknowledgment, especially from Luke, but nonetheless, she persists on her earlier claim, “That being said, I really think we should leave by 10.”

“10?!” Luke repeats with annoyance. “Tomorrow’s gig starts at six. PM. And might I remind you again: it's freakin New Years Eve! We have to stay till the ball drops!”

“We have to practice one last time and we have to get there bef-“

“Alright, alright, boss.” Luke was done arguing (for the time being.) Instead his eyes followed Y/N’s who was no longer listening, bored of her best friend and boyfriend’s little fighting game, as they looked for Julie in the clusters of kids all around the room on the main floor. “Let’s just look for Jules so we can get back. And can we make it to midnight at the least? Please? I mean, come on, there no food at the Molina house to celebrate with and you were having fun up there with those turntables.” He started to smile cheekily at Flynn, “Don’t deny it.”

Flynn took in a sharp breath as she thought. Nick did have access to some sick equipment and has always been so kind enough to share, so it would be fun to play around some more. “We’ll see how I feel at 11. And by the way, we do have things to celebrate with at the garage. I bought stuff specifically so you guys wouldn’t complain when we left,” she went on, the three taking another turn, “We’re going to have some fun here till 10, or 11 I guess, get back to the garage, celebrate New Years— woo-hoo!— and then you guys are settled down by 12:15, 30 the latest. I don’t care if you’re not asleep, just not outside.” Seeing Luke’s face rise up again she defends herself,  “It's not my fault you phantoms have terrible time management skills! You guys literally have transportation powers and you’re either late or not present. It’s crazy! I need to make sure you’re there and we get paid. Period.”

Luke suppressed a grunt as Y/N rubbed his shoulders, laughing a bit at the truth of Flynn’s statement. 

Then, to console Luke, she whispered in his ear, “No matter where we are, I’ll be there. Plan still intact.” 

“True.” Luke whispered back, rubbing his nose on the side of her head. 

Luke liked his freedom. He was used to calling the shots when it came to the band, only taking on co-captain position as Julie challenged him with just as much leadership star power as he contained. This made Flynn appointing herself as band manager not something to be desired exactly, especially when she made decisions like this on their down time. He didn’t quite enjoy being told where to go and when, but on the other hand, he couldn’t help to admit to himself that the tech savvy skills both her and Y/N brought to the table were tremendously helpful. The 90s boy was used to walking around town trying to find the next cafe for the guys to play at that he didn’t know how easy it was in this digital world to find venues he never even heard of through the internet. This made him never forget to say thank you after a gig she or Y/N would find from their endless online searchings. And on Flynn’s end, she never forgot to commend Luke on his writing skills when he happened to be the scribe for one of the band’s songs she happened to enjoy, but other than that, they did not have that much to say to each other. 

Despite the natural banter and quips  that would suggest they were well acquainted, they were actually still quite awkward. Luke was used to admiring her relationship with Julie and Y/N from afar, and for Flynn, after the boys came back to life she didn’t know exactly how to fit herself into the group. Of course she was a part of it, Y/N made certain of it as she herself had also felt strange about her placement in Julie’s new friend group before Julie formally introduced her to them, not knowing that her cousin could also see ghost like she could, but overall, Flynn felt just the tiniest bit embarrassed that the boys she once called ‘cute ghosts’-- more than twice-- heard her say that and all the other things she’d say not knowing they were around (Julie told her they could sometimes snoop in unbeknownst to even her at times. ‘They don’t know boundaries,’ she would say.) Flynn especially felt this way when one of those ex-ghosts was Luke who knew he was ‘cute,’  as she once said, and would bother her about it endlessly when he was first able to communicate with her. 

Were they friends? Or was it simply that Luke was just a friend of her friends and that Flynn was just the friend of his girlfriend and mutual friend. Neither of them knew where their relationship stood. This caused Flynn to use her wit as a defense mechanism or to only begin a conversation with the guy when it was about something band related. ‘You kind of act like siblings,’ Y/N would tell them when they were at it. Both of them gawked at the word. ‘Siblings?!’

Around another corner the three went, passing the open space below the home stage that was being used as a dance floor. They went to the room adjacent to it. It was another rather large area, though this one was filled with more furniture, a lot in fact, perhaps to make space for the makeshift dance area. There was also an unused fireplace which caught the eyes of Y/N who yanked on the connected hand of Luke’s and then Flynn to take notice of who sat on the ledge. 

The water bunching up in her eyes sparked white from the room's fluorescent gleaming lights, making her tears look much bigger and shinier. It made the group feel bad they didn’t find her sooner. 

“Julie!” They all exclaimed in unison though Luke’s reaction was filled with the most apparent fret: the glow of the lights and his wide eye expression showed clearly how his eyes were growing greener with questions and worry. “What happened?” He tried to ask softly, not knowing how to react to her tears. The attempt at softness then immediately changed into one of starting frustration as he sat down next to his poor bandmate, hand on her knee, looking toward Flynn, “Why didn’t you tell us she was like this?” 

“Because she wasn’t like this when I left!” Flynn countered, coming to sit down next to Julie on her left side as Luke had taken the right. 

“Why do you always-“

“Enough guys,” Y/N silenced them for the third time that night. She noticed how Julie was shying away from both of their faces, not wanting to show them her tears. Julie was strong; a fighter; she sometimes much rather fake out her friends by smiling through her problems before she was ready to talk about them. Y/N knew all of this, related to it in fact, and could sense the possible embarrassment she must’ve been feeling. Not only did she create a movie moment for herself by being the girl crying at a party, but she was crying in front of her friends, when she was typically the person who tried to inspire hope, for she was the front man of her own band after all. 

Y/N could also sense— guessing by the way she mostly was turning her face from Luke— that it was a boy problem. Not that Luke’s jittery expression, or close proximity to her face was helping her open up either. 

Luke was trying to work on being more helpful in moments where his friends were in tears, but sometimes he could be a little too aggressive, or ‘extra,’ as Flynn would put it and Alex would agree, adding the new slang term to his vocabulary. 

Y/N took a seat in front of her on the ground, rubbing her friend's arm. “It’s okay, Jules. Nobody cares what you look like. You can tell us.” 

“I know, it’s just-“ she sucked her teeth, looking up, head still tilted to Flynn’s side. “It’s stupid.”

 “No ones going to judge you,” Y/N promised, pointing her head to Luke’s direction for Julie to see. 

“Yeah, and I bet it’s not ‘stupid’ anyway.” Flynn added.

“Nothings stupid if it made you cry, Jules.” Luke chimed in, finally agreeing with Flynn on something for the second time this night. “Who was it? I’ll beat them up for you.” He joked.

“Oh my god, no!” Julie tittered just a little while trying to wipe away all her tears. “And please never say something like that again. You sound like a dad.”

“Well he is supposed to be like 40 or something,” Flynn said, making the both of her best friends laugh. Julie specifically shook her head at this moment of Flynn and Luke’s typical banter, it was the first time she was getting a whiff of it tonight. Although she appreciated the entertainment they brought when in a room together, she agreed with Y/N that they were relentless. 

Luke let that one go, seeing how it finally brought a smile to the girl’s face, “There she is.”

Julie rolled her eyes at him, sighing as her fit of giggles passed, “Okay,” she started slowly, “Well... it was Nick… and I know it’s stupid-“

“-Not stupid.” Her friends finished.

“But you know, he invited me to this party. Directly! Said he wanted to hang out- to dance. When we came, the party just started so he had to say hi to people, that made sense, and he told me to stay near the main floor, so I waited. And then my shoe broke, and then some girl spilled some of that fondue on the bottom of my dress which I had to get out with bathroom wipes, so that was annoying. Then next thing you know it’s an hour later and all I’ve done is eat pizza and watch Flynn at the turntables…”

Julie went on. She explained that finally Nick showed up again , but as he was walking to her, Carrie had just arrived at the party, stopping him in his tracks. Apparently her gift was too heavy to bring inside, so she wanted to take him to her car to show him right then and there. “He said he’d be five minutes tops. Told me to come here by the fireplace, so again, I waited. Then five minutes turned into fifteen, so I got up.” She sidetracked, “That’s not me. Just sitting there, waiting, waiting, waiting. I felt dumb. That's when I walked to the backyard to see what was going on out there, find something to do after all this time, but funny enough that’s where I found Nick and Carrie, laughing, dancing, having a great time.” She wipes a new stray tear, “I decided to look for you,” she nodded to Y/N, “And it’s no offense Flynn, you know I love you, it’s just that I didn’t want to hear you tell me that ‘he’s not worth it’ at the moment.” She gave herself a pity laugh, “I’m currently feeling a little bad for myself as you can see.” 

“I’m so sorry Julie.” Y/N started. “But Flynn only tells you the facts like that because she thinks you’re so worthy of more.” 

“So much more,” Flynn added on, moving closer to Julie.

 “But I get it, it's not fair.” consoled Y/N. “I try to always consider his actions in those instances with Carrie as him just being a pacifist, but if he said he wanted to be with you and continuously told you he would, then he should’ve been here.”

“Agreed, but also, being a pacifist doesn’t mean to always stay quiet though, you can find a way to keep the peace and still do what’s right.” Luke spoke up. “He shouldn’t let Carrie always take him away like that.”

Y/N gave Luke a smile, “Insightful.”

“Strangely,” Flynn chimed in, “but exactly right. Not to mention how it’s not fair— no matter how nice he is— for him to just let Carrie keep saying whatever the hell she wants without calling her out.” 

“I just feel like I shouldn’t be so beat up. It is his birthday after all. He can do what he wants.” Muttered Julie.

“No!” Y/N told her. “You feel like you wasted your time, I get that! It’s his birthday, but your feelings are still important.” 

“Also,” Luke started, “Julie, I mean, come on! You could do so much better. So what? He’s like 18 now? Well I’m 18 now too, supposed to be 40 something apparently and I look like this! This! Compared to Nick?  Julie… girl!” He stated her name again, smiled wide, “I know Molina’s have better taste than that. Not to say what you didn’t want to hear, but, it’s true: he’s not worth it. Period.” He mimicked Flynn with the last word. 

Both Flynn and Julie gagged, “Oh my god,” they said in union. Y/N just put her face in her hands.

“You were actually doing well, and then you just go and screw it up like that?” Flynn sighed. 

“Now you went from a dad to sounding like a whole ratty teenage boy.” She rolled her eyes teasingly, trying to conceal her laughter at his conceited remark, “Disgusting.”

“Well as long as I got you to stop crying, that’s all that matters anyway.” He laughed goofily, invading her personal space once again. 

“Yeah,” Julie realized with a contented sigh. It seemed all the company she really needed was her friends. 

“Well, I think the only thing to do now is make up for all that time wasted, huh?”  Y/N spoke with a smirk. “If he doesn’t want to be your dance partner, it looks like you’re going to have to take on three instead.” 

“Fuck yeah,” Luke said, jumping up, grabbing Y/N and Julie’s hands and running to the dance floor.

Flynn called to the group, as she parted from them, heading to the stage, “Lemme change the song!” 

“OOOH!” Luke roared as the ooos and aahs of Donna and the Dynamos filled the room. “One of the best things to come out of the 2000s!” 

Julie and Y/N laughed at the surprisingly grand amount of love Luke had for Mamma Mia! 

Luke imitated the hustle, sticking his tongue out,  shaking his hips, and making Y/N dance along with him, moving around Julie who looked at them incredulously. 

“Come oooon,” he said to Julie’s direction, “Nobody can NOT like this song.” And after that Julie gave in, agreeing that a Mamma Mia and ABBA song was too good not to dance to. Flynn came up right behind her, making the dancing trio into a group of four. 

From jumping, to slides and shoulder grooves, and even forming their own little dancing circle the four lived in the song, seeing the last of Julie’s worry wash away as the speakers blasted the words “Dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen,” to which Julie’s friends made sure to spotlight her on as their hands sprinkled up and down spirit fingers as she twirled, enjoying her title that fit perfectly with her age. 

“Thanks guys,” Julie smiled sweetly, still jumping to the beat.

“WOOOO!” Luke hollered into the crowd, taking Y/N’s hand, swaying and jumping with her exclusively now. 

“WOO!” She yelled back.

“LOUDER, LOUDER!” He yelled in her face, shaking his head, his hair imitating a lion’s mane as he gritted his teeth, getting closer to her face. 

“WOOOOO!” She yelled, trying to match her boyfriend’s energy. 

“YES, Y/N. WOOO!” They kept jumping and he spun her around, letting her twirl into his grasp. He held her closer, one arm tightly around her waist while the other still held her hand, stepping and swaying side to side in a fast pace in order to keep up with the quick musical tune. Her laughs of surprisement to his actions filled him with pride. She was usually so focused on making her friends smile, she could sometimes forget to just have fun for herself. She dropped anything to tend to their needs, which is why tonight was important. At her first party he was going to make her smile and have fun, and that ended with a New Year’s kiss. Hopefully, he could find a way to hide from Flynn— and his friends for that matter— till that time to make it happen. 

Finally the song died down and a rush of endorphins filled the floor as almost everyone in the area, even those who typically didn’t dance joined along to the jumping motion the four started at the beginning of the song. “Should I change it?” Flynn asked Julie as the next song started, noticing how different the vibe of this song was from the last: slower, more romantic.

“No,” Julie told Flynn as she watched Luke take his arms closer into Y/N’s sides, “Let’s let them have their moment.”

Y/N arms went around Luke’s neck, and his arms wrapped around her waist, pulling each other closer while swaying in a circular motion. He connected their foreheads. His eyes fixated on her own. They were so gentle, so sweet, so comforting, he felt safe looking in them. He could stay that way forever.

“Luke?”

Luke sighed, once again just minutes of feeling release ruined. “Yeah, bud?” It was Alex. 

“I’m sorry to bother you, but this kid Reginald-“ 

“Don’t tell me he lost the dog again. I don’t want to look for it.”

“It’s not the dog! Well, not this time. I think he’s finally realized that we can’t take it home with us. It’s-“ Alex started snickering which then turned into great belly laughs he couldn’t stop, “I just- I can’t- I can’t- just please,” he had no control. “Please I need your help!”

“What the hell, Alex?”

“Just-“ Alex put his hand over his mouth, trying to conceal his laughs. He motioned Luke with his other hand, walking away. 

Luke kept his hand in Y/N’s, bringing her along with him, “I don’t want to get split up again, like last time with the dog.”

“It’s not the dog!” Alex exclaimed, still laughing. 

The three were now on the right side of the house, near the pool door that also stood to the right and in the area sat a couch and pool table. The wall on the left side had a small vent near the floor which is where they found Reggie, hip deep in the square hole.

“HELLO!” Reggie wagged his butt, for his friends to see, “Did you bring Luke?”

“Yeah!” Alex answered “Do you see now? He’s stuck!”

“How and why?!” Y/N asked, now joining in with Alex’s uncontrollable laughter as Reggie kept shaking his butt. Quickly Luke couldn’t help himself either.

“No! Y/N is here?” Reggie asked, “Y/N I’m so sorry you have to see me like this. I haven’t been doing my squats recently. I know I don’t look in the best of shape-“

“I think that’s the last thing I’m worried about, Reg,” Y/N said, still losing her breath along with Alex who yelled an incredulous ‘what?!’ at his words. 

“No one cares about your glutes, bro.” Luke shook his head, laughing with the two. 

“Well I do!” Reggie fought back. “I don’t wear these skinny jeans for nothing!”

Alex’s laughter from Reggie’s wackiness turned into one of apprehension. “Well there are more important things to worry about! Like my date being almost two hours late and also how I don’t even know what to say to him because I haven’t seen him in like two months and it's New Year’s Eve and yeah, okay, okay- Stop shaking your ass!”

“Okay,” Y/N held his shoulders, still losing her breath, “Willie is going to come, alright?  It'll be fine, but-“

“Let’s deal with gluteus minimus first.” Luke finished.

“That’s not even-“

“I don’t care.” Luke finished for Alex this time. “I’ll take the right leg, Alex, take the left. Pull!”

Ow! Ow! Ow!” Reggie yelped.

“PULL!”

“Ow! Stop!” 

“It’s going to hurt till we get you out, Reg” Alex explained. “And why isn’t Y/N helping?”

“Oh, sorry,” She was caught up in the hysterics. 

“Oh that’s right,” Luke noticed. “Take the right, I’ll hold onto his feet and pull from the back. On three. 1, 2, 3, PULL!”

“WAIT!” Reggie yelled.

“WHAT?” Alex yelled back.

“Luke said on three, but you pulled at ‘pull’, or really after pull, so is it really ‘on three’ or do you want it to be ‘on pull’ or ‘after three’ or ‘after pull’?”

Alex shook his head, “Does it matter?!”

Reggie’s voice cracked, “Just asking!”

“Okay, ON pull!” Luke clarified, “1,2,3, PULL”

“NO! WAIT!”

“WHAT?!” The three pullers yelled. 

“I felt a tear in my jacket, I love this jacket.”

“Oh god,” the boys complained.

“I think it’s just going to have to tear for us to get you out,” Y/N told him. 

“But you gave it to me!” Y/N heard the sadness in his voice. It was a brown leather jacket with long strands of fringe on either side. She thought it went perfectly with his banjo and love for country music. It also had big inside pockets that could hold all his little treasures, and whatever he had in his pocket today is probably the reason why it was so hard to get him out. 

“Maybe Victoria knows a good dry cleaner that can give us a discount,” she reasoned. 

“Tía does always have very nicely pressed clothes,” Reggie agreed, as an honorary Molina— self appointed, but appreciated by most— he felt that it was okay to address Victoria as such. 

“Yeah,” She laughed at his words, “So are you going to tell me how you got stuck?”

“Well I knew there was going to be a pool table here so I brought my lucky gold eight ball-” Reggie had a lucky every- “And it kind of just fell in here.”

Alex corrected him, “You mean you were getting too cocky at the game and knocked the ball so hard that it fell in there.”

“Potatoes, tomatoes, uh, spaghetti! It doesn't matter now, I got my ball and now I need you guys to help me get out.”

“Sounds like a plan to me,” Luke nodded, “You ready Reg?”

“...No!”

“You want to make out with the rats? They have diseases.” Alex sarcastically noted.

“They’re misunderstood creatures!” Reggie stated on their behalf. Reggie’s butt buzzed, “Oh that's my phone, that feels weird, “ he laughed. 

“Phone!’ Alex's eyes widened, “Where’s my phone?” He dropped Reggie’s leg

“Alex!” Luke exclaimed want to get this over with.

“Willie texted, he said he’ll be here in thirty- thirty minutes!” 

“Anything else,” Y/N asked.

“He’s excited to spend the New Years with me” He said softly, unsurely.

“That's great.” Everyone agreed, happy for the boy. 

“Are you going to text back?” Y’N asked excitedly, happy with the idea of Alex’s romance coming to life. 

“Oh yeah!” Alex’s face faltered, “Shit. It just died.”

“Just get Reggie’s,” Luke shrugged, “But after we get him out!”

After 3 more tries at “ON PULLS,” Alex, Luke, and Y/N were able to get Reggie out, only tearing his jacket on the left side.

“Thanks guys” Reggie said appreciatively. 

As Luke patted Reggie back Alex spoke: “Um, hey, Y/N?” He asked quietly, hands in his pocket, “Mind if I steal you for a second?”

“Sure,” she smiled sweetly at him, turning the corner so they could have a little bit of privacy. 

“I’m nervous.” He sighed, “ I already spoke to Luke about it before we left for tonight, so he’s already given me all the inspiration he’s got, but I’m still not sure of it all… He took the whole coming back to life hard, but I didn’t think he would take it so hard that he would separate himself from us, from me. ” The boy frowned. 

“I think he really liked being a ghost,” Y/N started.

“Yeah and we ruined his whole life,”

“We didn’t ruin his life, we saved it. He’s free, just like you guys. And…” Y/N trailed off trying to find the words, “Hm, well, I think he was just a ghost so long it became a part of his identity, and now that part left him, it must’ve been hard to take in. Should he have been more verbal about needing space? Yes. You deserved that. If you want to tell him that, you should, especially if it’ll help relieve whatever thoughts you’ve got suck up there. I’m sure he will be apologetic if you ask calmly, try to see it from his perspective. And that way he can be empathetic to your perspective as well, you know? On the other hand, you can also take this New Year in stride and just like go to the past and have a good time with him. Or do both!” She put an arm on his shoulder, giving him a warm closed smile. 

He nodded taking in her words, trying to remember what she said as she said it.

“You got this, okay? What does Luke say? Step into your greatness?”

“Heh,” he laughed, “Greatness is usually for Julie, awesomeness is mine, not saying that I am awesome though, it’s- it’s just what he says.”

“Well it’s because it’s true. You’re awesome, Alex. Just be open hearted and your awesomeness will shine through.”

“But.. how?”

“Didn’t I- Never mind. Okay, from what I know, Willie already knows you, and likes you, and enjoys talking to you, so there are no awkward first encounters to be made. You’ll see him and all you need to do is be prepared to say hi, that is unless you want to talk to him about the past, and then it will go off from there. I feel it ending up well, I promise. And even if it doesn’t? Show him the food. Everyone loves food.”

“Hi- maybe past- food- got it.” He turned, but Y/N quickly grabbed him. 

“Wait, but don’t just think about that. Remember: He’s coming because he wants to see YOU. He wants to spend New Years with YOU. That’s what his message said right?”

“Right.” It seemed Alex forgot. 

“So believe it. Live in that message.” 

“Okay,” he started to smile lightly, though still a little wearily. “Thanks… He wants to see me, he WANTS to see me, live in it.” He repeated her words. 

Alex gave her Reggie’s phone, asking her to message Willie one last time stating that he would be waiting for him by the front of the house by the band’s van. She did so and turned the corner hoping to find both Reggie and Luke, but unfortunately the latter person was not in sight. 

“Reg, where’s Luke?”

“Y/N! Meet Amelie Laurent,” Reggie introduced the girl sitting next to him, imitating a French accent as he said her name. “She’s a foreign exchange student from France. She likes my jacket.” He said with a smirk. 

Y/N guessed he didn’t hear her question.

“Nice to meet you,” the girl said giggling at Reggie’s antics. “Comment tu t’appelles?” She asked.

“Uh, yes.” Y/N stared blankly, watching the girls face fall, “I’m just kidding, it’s Y/N. I know that much at least.” Both you and the girl laughed. 

“Aw look, my girls getting along!” 

“Your girl?” Amelie questioned.

“Well maybe not yet,” Reggie winked while wiggling a brow. 

“You should get Luke and come hang out with me and Miss Amelie Laurent.” Reggie once again pronounced her name with the most fake sounding French accent he could muster, having fun with how the name rolled off his tongue. 

“Speaking of that,” Y/N handed him his phone, “Do you know where he went?”

“Well he didn’t go through the pool door because that’s where my Amelie Laurent came from, so I’m guessing back there,” Reggie pointed his thumb behind him.

“Alright, then I guess I’m going that way. Nice to meet you Miss Amelie.” She giggled, attempting her own French accent.

-

About 10 minutes had passed. Y/N had walked around to the backyard, upstairs to some rooms, to the dance floor, the kitchen, stopping along the way when Julie and Flynn caught her in their sight till she found herself back by the pool table. Reggie’s banjo and doggy friend was present but not he nor his lady friend, or Luke. Y/N wondered if she should finally try the pool door till she heard a sound, a voice actually. As she walked down the hallway she was just minutes before, she heard his voice. 

It was Luke, his tones muffled by the music and talking inside, but she could hear it, it filled her senses, making her heart flutter to hear his singing as it belted a tune much more soulful then the usual pop or rock songs the band sang. He was outside, in the backyard, one of the first places she looked. As she almost reached the back door, she was pushed rather harshly, by someone with wheels, skateboard wheels. 

“Whoa! Sorry!” It was Willie. “You’re Y/N right?” He smiled, running his fingers through his hair as he took off his helmet. “I know we’ve never really spoken, but we know of each other.”

“We do,”  Y/N said pleasantly. 

“I’m glad I finally found one of you, I’m totally lost.”

“Well I think Luke was just outside there, actually.”

“Oh really? God I was going so fast I wasn’t even thinking. Or looking would be correct, right? Anyway, I’m sorry I didn’t see you there, sometimes I still think I’ll just go through people. Can’t believe I have to walk indoors now.” He rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Life of the living,” she tried to joke, “I’m sorry. I know it must be strange.”

“Yeah, better than being under Caleb though.”

“Right,” Y/N nodded. 

“Oh, sorry,” 

“No don’t be. I’ll never know him like you did. No emotional tie here.”

“Um,” An awkward silence erupted, “So since you’re the only one in the group I’ve found you want to play a game?” 

“A game?” She asked, confused.

“Yeah!” He raised his brow.

“And what game would this be?” 

“The Where’s Alex game. If you have the answer I’ll love you forever. I already know I’m super late.”

“Oh!” she laughed at the realization, “He’s at the front! You didn’t see him? Or see the text?”

“My phone died,” He pulled out the device as proof, the glass was severely cracked, “I’m not sure how to properly take care of it as you can see. No wonder I make it die so fast.”

“His phone died too, strangely enough. But he’s waiting for you at the front entrance. You didn’t come from that way?”

“No, I didn’t know if someone would stop me if I went that way because I wasn’t actually invited. I never really did this kind of thing in the past. It’s my first time.” 

“Really? It’s my first too, but for you? You seem so cool to me to never be invited.”

“Well the actual definition of cool and high schoolers definition of cool is wildly different. We’re obviously a different breed, you and I. Better.” He joked. 

“Well thank you.” She could tell why Willie liked him. “Alex is by the white van, it has ghosts painted all over it so you can’t miss it.”

“Thank you!”

“Of course!”

As he was about to walk away, skateboard in hand, he stopped, “Can I be honest?”

“Sure.” She smiled nodding at him to continue.

“I’m a little nervous. I know that’s his thing so I should try to get over it, but I can’t help it. This not being a ghost thing has been hard, you know? Is he mad? I didn’t mean to separate myself…” he faultured. Although Y/N knew Alex’s half of the story, Willie and her were still newly acquainted, it made sense why he felt the need to stop himself from possibly over sharing. 

“He can’t wait to see you.” She reassured him, ending the silence. “It’s literally why he decided to stay by the front. He wanted you to find him right away. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“You sure?”

She confirmed, “Absolutely positive.”

“Alright, thanks again. And nice to meet you! You know, not just by me peering through windows and being creepy. Sorry.”

“Ghosts will be ghosts.” Y/N shrugged. She watched as Willie gave her a laugh and started to walk away. 

“Y/N,” the sweet voice from the backyard called for her again, this time saying her name.

“Luke,” her eyes brightened, turning around.

“Found you.” He grinned, intertwining their fingers on both sides. 

“Well really I would have found you first. I heard your voice, from the backyard, but Willie stopped me before I could go.”

“Ah, you heard my call for you.”

“For me?” He hummed in response.

“I’ll pretend that’s true.” 

“Good,” Luke brought one of her hands up to his lips, kissing it softly. “So where have you been in the last twenty?”

“Well I was looking for you. Reggie said you didn’t go through the pool door so-“

“I did.”

You did?”

“I did! He probably didn’t mention it because he was so focused on-

“Miss Amelie Laurent!” You both said in unison, French accents prevalent. 

“He said you went back here so I went to the backyard, but you weren’t there, so I went upstairs back to Nick room, and you don’t want to know what I saw in there-”

“Ooo tell me,”  his eyes were eager.

“Anyway, I went back down stairs, found Julie near the kitchen— we shared a cupcake— and then she asked me if I would go to the dance floor with her and find someone to talk to so I did that, but then Flynn can said she lost her bracelet so we three had to look for that one, then I came back to the pool table, heard you singing, bumped into Willie, asked me where Alex was, and then I think he needed some advice— he and Alex are literally having the same problem, it’s kind of cute— and then you finally came. That’s my story.”

Luke's mouth was open, eyes going around in a circle as she went on her tangent, hanging onto every word, he thought it was pretty adorable. “Well, my story is much shorter. When I picked Reggi up, you disappeared.”

“Oh, Alex asked me to speak to him, all we did was turn the corner.”

“I didn’t know, but then some guy from the pool came up to me asked me if I could show him some cords from a phantom song and before I could say yes he was pushing me out the door. I helped him, went back inside, met Miss Amelie Laurent, walked to the backyard because Reggie said you went that way, and there I stayed.”

“If only I went back.”

“We’re good now.” Though a smile still ghosted his face he felt a sudden suppression wash over him, “Are you having fun, Y/N/N?”

“I- Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know… I just know it’s your first party here and I wanted you to have a good time, but at every second someone needs you, or someone needs me, and we’ve been pulled around and around and around,-“ Luke moves his head left to right, a rasp in his voice like a motor engine as he repeated the word for effect, “-that I feel like you’re not letting yourself get into some trouble like everyone else.”

“Trouble?”

“Lack of a better word,” he smiled smugly. “I’m just saying, you’re not Julie and the Phantoms glorified assistant-”

“Neither are you. You’ve done just as much as me tonight.” She reasoned. 

“Yeah, but that’s because I was trying to stick with you and lessen the load. You know you do so much for us all the time.”

“I guess I just like you guys too much.” she shrugged, matching his playful tone from before.

“Like just me a little bit more then.” He moved closer, placing his fingers on her jaw, “Hmm?”

He finally kissed her, a real kiss this time. His other hand moved to her neck as her hands moved to his arms. The hand on her jaw lifted her chin higher, deepening the action.

“People are watching,” she said through a breath, eyes alert. 

Before going back in he said, “No one's watching,” Then after a peck, “And no one cares.” His hands slid to her waist, head tilting to the other side, he hummed, causing Y/N’s hands to fall to his cheeks, quickly sliding her fingers against his chest; she was lost in the moment. 

Slowly Luke’s feet moved backwards, moving one of the hands that was wrapped around his waist to her hip as he motioned her against the wall. “Ow,” Y/N yelped, the black and blue Flynn gave her earlier pulsing again. 

Luke’s hand came to her head, cushioning it against the wall. “Sorry, I forgot.”

“So did I,” she laughed. 

The both smiled at each other, Luke forehead connecting with hers, he rubbed his nose against her own etching more bits of laughter out of her. He relished in the noises, the closeness, the feeling. 

Looking down he noticed their shoes, Y/N’s original chucks in the middle of both vans. He didn’t care what shoes she wore, but he much appreciated how she had to change her footwear for Julie because now they matched… somewhat. The black and white pallets, but different designs; similar, but different; individuals, but connected. He liked it. “Nice shoes, kid.”

“Thanks,” she laughed, “Not what I originally intended, but they work.”

“Work better, in my opinion.” He moved back, extending her arms out as he held her hands. He was surveying how her black dress with white polka dots perfectly matched the color scheme of the converse. “Perfect.”

Once again she blushed, but didn’t respond. Instead she made a remark about his own shoes. “You know, I don’t understand how you wear those everyday, yet they aren’t all dirty like mine.”

“Well I used to be a ghost, when I was walking my feet weren’t actually treading on the Earth.” 

“Well that was three months ago.”

“Almost three months ago,” he corrected, for that’s when their official relationship started. Luke always thought she was pretty, right from the moment he saw her, but it wasn’t love at first sight, not even like. She was a little quiet, at least with him and the boys and they all noticed. With Julie and Flynn she smiled brightly and chatted constantly, or that’s what he would hear when he would come to Julie’s room, hearing her voice through the door. It was a sweet voice, empathetic, understanding; he thought it sounded like music, and not only did he wonder how his name would sound on her lips, but he felt connected to it. He understood the desire to make others feel good. Through his singing he tried to make people feel seen, make their problems validated, and he could tell she tried to do that with her words. 

For Y/N at first, she wanted Julie to have the band for herself. She thought that this was one of the few things making her feel happy during this dark time of Tía Rose’s passing, so she didn’t want to step in too much, not to mention the realization that she could see ghosts wasn’t exactly the easiest things for her to get her head around the way Julie did. But her elusiveness only made Luke more curious, and when Luke was curious, he was persistent in finding out whatever it was he wanted to know. 

First, he would ask Julie to bring Y/N down for their rehearsals and she would, sometimes, but nothing gave. Y/N would most give Julie feedback, shying away from the ghosts gaze, still unsure how to interact. Then, he just started asking Julie about her cousin, little questions here and there till Julie finally got tired and told him to just go talk to her himself. This is where he was at a stand still as he was unsure how to approach her. Finally, after noticing how her room lights would shine quite far into the night, he decided to go up there, telling himself he would just ask her why she sleeps so late, that he only noticed because he likes to take walks at night. It sounded reasonable to him. 

This is when he realized how similar Molina’s are: Always trying to be brave for others. After she told him she always had trouble falling asleep unless it was specifically her bed at home, but didn’t want to tell anyone else because it would bother them. She wanted to stay here for Julie and for the friendships she was finally making at Los Feliz, so Luke decided to start a tradition with her: late night bike rides. It was a way to tire her out and a way for him to get some alone time with her. Him taking a bike from the garage, and her using her own she brought from her old home. They rode separately, but together, letting the quiet road open them up to the other. Telling each other stories, discussing interests, consoling each other when they were feeling down. Luke never knew how close you could feel to someone else by just conversation until he had to do it with Y/N. It made him appreciate her in a way he’d never felt before. 

They were not friends, they knew that fairly quickly, but they didn’t hurt each other by talking about being more. It was just an unspoken agreement that they hung out with each other exclusively in the way that they did, but they never spoke of romantics. Their rides were special, only for them. That’s why when he became alive the first thing he wanted to do, after celebrating with everyone, was take a ride with her. One bike this time. Her heels on the bars and she heads onto his shoulders, showing her where he used to grow up. That’s what he always wanted to do. 

“Not enough time,” Luke said in response to Y/N who mentioned that wearing the same two pairs of shoes for 3 months had to have made them a little messed up, but he was talking about them, thinking about how short of a time ago it was that he got got be with her this way. It was a long year of just knowing her without the sense of touch. He felt lucky. Once again, he dipped his hands on the side of her face, starting to go in till-

“Hey, Y/N! And oh, Luke! Hey man.” It was the New Years Eve birthday boy.

“Oh, hey, Nick,” Y/N said, maintaining a kind disposition although she knew how his actions made Julie feel. 

“Um,” he laughed awkwardly at Luke’s stoicism, it was unnatural for his character and even Nick knew that by now, “Well I was wondering if you knew where Julie was. I’ve been looking for her everywhere.”

“Really?” Luke questioned.

“Yeah, I promised her a dance,” he laughed, “or really she promised me one because we all know I suck.”

Y/N laughed kindheartedly at his deprecation. She was still trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Carrie does have a dominating attitude, and with someone as tender Nick it would make sense that he got roped into whatever it was even at his own party, but looking at Luke’s face and knowing how she felt earlier, she decided to to be upfront, “Look Nick, you don’t have to say anything, but I think you like Julie, and I don’t know if Julie likes you, but let’s say she does: You’re sending mixed signals. I get you and Carrie have a history and that she can be bossy, but you make your own choices. If you want to hang out with a certain someone, I think you should put your foot down and make it a priority to do that.” She tried to be ambiguous, obviously failing throughout. 

Nick sighed, “I know… I have no excuse. But that’s why I’ve been trying to find her. I want to hang out with her, do a- I don’t know-“

“‘I don’t know?’” Luke intervened, restating his words, unsure about the possible actions behind them.

“I mean like... New Year's kiss, I- don’t laugh at me Y/N!”

“No! I think it’s sweet. I'm only laughing because I’ve understood your pain, Nick.”

Nick laughed alongside her albeit he was still mostly laughing at himself. Luke kept his grumpy face, eyebrows twitching. “Well if that’s what you want, go get it before the Carrie snatches you up again”

“But even if she does,” Luke started. 

“Put your foot down.” Y/n finished “You know, Stand Tall, like the phantoms song.”

“‘Whatever happens’  he snickered, waving his finger as he said the lyric in hopes to ease the tension with Luke, but he was not amused. 

“Exactly,” Y/N smiled, paying her boyfriend's chest. 

“Right,” Luke agreed, he was really only saying it for Y/N. “Nice basketball sheets by the way”

“Hey, come on, my dad got those for me. It’s nostalgic, you know? Anyway, so I know you guys were busy and I’m sorry that I interrupted anything, but do you think you could help me find her? I really want to find her.”

“Listen Nick,” Luke started once again, it was getting late and he still had a plan he wanted to maintain. 

“Y/N! So there’s this gu- Nick, oh-“

“Julie, I’ve been looking for you!” Nick exclaimed, happy to see her. 

“You have?”

“Apparently,” Luke answered. 

“Well Nick, actually I-“

“Wait. Julie, wait. I- um, I was also looking for all you phantoms actually. I mean I was going to find you and talk to you first and the ask about this later but hey two out of the four are here so,”

“What are you talking about?” Julie asks, hoping he’d get to the point.

“I was wondering if you could play a song? Just one. I don’t have a bass but I’ve got a drum kit on stage already and I’ve got plenty of electrics. The party’s coming to a close and I thought this would be one last thing to bring it all together to make a great night. I know it’s last minute,”

“Nick-“

“Julie.” He stopped, stumbling with his words, till he finally felt sure of what to say, “I’m beating around the bush. What I really need to say is I’m sorry for leaving you. You’re the only one I wanted to hang out with tonight. Carrie- Carrie’s just lonely. If I’m being honest and I promise I don’t mean this in a rude way, but Kayla is just more of her henchman. I know we used to date so it looks strange, but I think I’m her only friend right now. She bought a really grand present and took me away to show it to me, that’s all. I should have stopped to speak to you first though. That’s on me.”

Julie looked down, nodding, “I appreciate that.” 

“You don’t have to sing and you don’t have to give me any more of your time tonight if you don’t want to. I’m just glad you’re here either way.” 

“I don’t mind hanging out with you... if you actually stick around this time-“

“I will!”

“But singing? I guess I’ll leave that one to you Luke.” Julie said, noticing his expression, lips scrunched up together.

“I- It’s your choice, Jules. Whatever you want.” He said lessening the intensity that was in his eyes, Nick did do what Y/N said after all. 

“Let’s sing then. This party has been a little hectic and I think we all need to get our emotions out. Let the New Year come in with good vibes. Right, buddy?” She said tapping Luke’s cheek. “Y/N, help me find the others?”

“Sure,” she said with a sympathetic smile to Luke who she noticed didn’t seem to enjoy that little buddy comment, nonetheless, she joined in: “See ya soon, buddy,” Y/N laughed, letting the ends of her finger tips brush against his till she was pulled away by Julie.

-

On stage, Julie and the Phantoms rose, singing Finally Free. It had become quite the party anthem for them. The repetition in the chorus made it such a good song for them to engage with the audience. Every time Julie sang ‘I got a spark in me’ the crowd would sing back, throwing their hands up in the process quite literally making the next lyric, ‘hands up if you’re with me’ come true in the most perfect way.

Y/N wished she brought her camera, instead she opted to take out her phone, taking some iPhone shots of the band, hoping the fans would enjoy these raw candid pictures, but then Luke caught her attention through the screen, he sent her a wink, one that the people in front of her probably thought was for them. As he strummed his guitar he yelled a ‘WOOO’ her way, bouncing with Reggie. Y/N decided to put her phone down. This performance was a New Years special, one to only be viewed in person; in the moment; no thinking of anyone else. Finding Flynn in the crowd who was also trying to catch some snapshots of her own, Y/N passed on the energy Luke had given to her: “Lets just have fun!” 

- 

Soon after, the song had ended, and despite not being the ‘hologram band’ anymore the Phantoms vanished from the stage, still giving the audience chills as Julie was the one last standing, thanking everyone for being such a great audience. When the gang realized the guys still had some ghosting abilities, Julie wondered if they should stop the whole disappearing thing, saying it would be harder for people to believe, but honestly, seeing the guys at school, at this party, and still watching them turn to dust when the music and cheering ended still amazed the crowd and made it just that more of a spectacle; no one cared for reason, it was simply that cool to see. 

Y/N hoped Luke would pop up alongside her, saving her the hassle of searching for him again, but alas, he did not. It made sense to her though, for she was right in the middle of the dancefloor. 

She decided to travel back around to the hallway where Nick and Julie had stopped her and Luke before. Walking down the hall, a hand snaked around her arm, pull her into a small closet under the staircase. “What the-” She stopped herself as she looked up and the light illuminated the small area with a click and a pull. Her eyes traveled slowly from the buttery yellow glow of the small light, the hand which pulled on the silvery chord, the shimmering skin of Luke, whose eyes followed her gaze till she met his own. “Howdy.” 

“Hey there, partner” she said softy, small breathy giggles coming out of her. “Nice hat.”

“Why thank you, pretty lady,” he responded with a wink, tipping the brown leathered cowboy hat he’d found.

“So what are we doing in here?” She asked, watching him take off the hat.

“Wanna play seven minutes in heaven?” 

“Like in 13 going on 30? Is that the kind of game you played in your 90s parties?” 

Luke rolled his eyes at her comment, moving on, “I decided that our friends are not going to leave us alone tonight, so I want just seven minutes. No interruptions, just us.” 

“I’d like that.”

Luke took out his phone starting a timer on his phone, “Yeah,” he nodded as he moved closer to her face, “me too.”

Lips on her own, he moved his hand to the back of her head, remembering her black and blue and he softly placed it against the wall of the small space, removing it once there. 

As her head leaned eagerly against it, the rest of her body was slanted, legs in between his own, he moved his arms to her waist, hands going up her back, while hands went up to his neck, going in to play with his hair. 

“Y/N?”

The sound caused her to jump, banging her head for the third time. “Ow.” 

It was Flynn. 

“Luke!” 

It was Reggie. 

Now Julie came over, “Is Y/N and Luke in there? Guys?!” H-“

“No!” Luke yelled. 

“Hey!” It was Alex, hand in hand with Willie. “Are they coming out? It’s-“

“Five minutes!” Luke yelled out again. He slid out his phone from underneath the door. “In fact, reset it to seven, give us seven.” 

Reggie took phone, “But Luke you didn’t notice the ti-“ 

Luke bagged on the door, “When it rings, that’s when you can give us your requests.”

Y/N covered her mouth, giggling at his aggressive tone. 

“Come here,” he motioned her with his hands on her hips, lips once again reconnected. As they started to move backward again, Luke moved his hands higher, picking her up, motioning her to wrap her legs around her waist, Y/N tried to catch her breath as their lips fell a part in the action, “Not this time,” he whispered in her ear, the vibrations of his voice making her shiver. He crashed his lips onto hers again as his hands went lower on his hips, supporting her on his frame. He swiped his tongue on her lower lip in an attempt to deepen the kiss further. Thereafter, their lips were connected in open mouth kisses, Luke taking control of the action.

“We just wanted to say Happy New Years, it’s 12:03.” Reggie uttered quietly at the bottom of the door, petting Nick’s dog that found him again. Y/N and Luke didn’t answer him, he figured they were too busy engrossed in each other. 

“Happy New Years, beautiful.” Luke sang to Y/N, sighing out, admiring the way her eyes looked into his, realizing that he completed his mission after all.  

“Happy New Years, Luke.” She breathed out, planting her lips on his once more. One hand on the side of his face as the other went back to his hair, rejoicing in their closeness, finally, uninterrupted.

- 

Thank you for reading! 

Tag list: @lolychu​ @marinettepotterandplagg​

[suckishima]

Chapter 1 | Chapter 402

I just opened up the first chapter to do a reread of everything from the beginning and I can’t believe I forgot that this quote is literally the first panel of the entire series. And the way the quote is then spread across those four pages in Chapter 402 makes me crazy, so excuse me while I ramble on about it under the cut

So I think this kind of goes without saying - but the fact alone that the series is bookended by this same quote right at the beginning, and throughout the final chapter just solidifies that it’s meant to be the core theme of the series. But it’s the way that the quote is presented the second time that really makes an impact to me.

At face value, as the opening line of the series, it’s just introducing us as the audience to the basic rules and concepts of volleyball. The teams are separated, there’s a ball, and neither team can let it touch the ground. It takes up a single panel and features nameless players diving, giving their all to try and keep the ball in play. It’s almost purely expository, there’s no emotion involved in the way it’s presented. (Except, arguably, the decision to bold the word “connect,” but I’m gonna come back to that later).

Then, as we read the series, we just come to learn the practical truth of these rules as they were presented to us. We meet other teams, play against them, and the whole time the idea of “connecting” the ball to your teammates, is slowly also framed as “connecting” the ball to the other side as well. If you botch a receive and it goes back over the net, it’s a chance ball for the other team to attack instead. The series is constantly bombarding us with imagery of the importance of every single action being connected to the next, first just physically in terms of passing the ball - but also themes of communication, friendships, and rivalries are brought into it too - emotionally connecting is just as crucial to winning as physically connecting is (BOTH of these are why they lose to Seijoh at Inter High). And the series shows us this both directly (Nekoma’s team banner being “connect” and their team emphasizes defense to make them strong), and more indirectly (Kageyama is well-renowned as a great player, but he doesn’t become phenomenal until he connects to his teammates emotionally and learns to communicate better). (I could tangent on about this for a while, but I’ve already sort of made a post about it here, so I won’t go on too long on this point).

So, when we get to Chapter 402, we’re already emotionally involved, we know the importance of the rules because we’ve been following them, living within in them for the last four hundred chapters. The quote starts small - that panel of Hinata and Kagayema’s backs that just say “Haikyu... also known as volleyball,” is the very bottom corner of a much larger spread, it functions as a sort of introduction or a lead in to the next three pages.

Then, the next two page spread and we’re finally seeing the opening play between Argentina and Japan at the Olympics. The whole right side of the page is dedicated to Oikawa’s serve and the “two teams separated by a net...” is lingering in the readers mind, with Oikawa of course representing the “other” team. Most of this whole spread serves to show us those original rules being put into action, but now instead of nameless players we aren’t emotionally invested in, they’re players that we know and understand - we feel the gravity and the scale of the game they’re playing, but at the same time it almost feels nostalgic. 

And something else that I think is really interesting, is that even though the quote on this spread starts with “two teams being separated by a net...” the net itself is nowhere to be seen on the page (other than the small panel at the right, where the emphasis is on the crowd and you can’t tell the teams apart anyway). From a practical standpoint, we know the net is there, but since we never see it visually, we’re already feeling how the theme of “connection” goes beyond just the players on “our” side of the net.

Then, the bottom left panel has Hinata and Kageyama’s backs to us again as the rush past each other in a way that’s very familiar to us now - the way they’re drawn to look like they’re going fast, and they aren’t looking at each other but are clearly on the same wavelength because of the framing - we know they’re about to do the freak quick. "Once it is in the air, a team has no more than three touches...” the words overlay it, but instead of going right into the next action, we flip the page and there’s only two words: “...to connect...” and the ENTIRE spread is just all of the characters who have made an impact on Hinata and Kageyama. The action just cuts out for a second and we’re left with this incredible visual of everyone they’ve connected with, and shown in instances of importance too - and the quote never stopped being about volleyball. The reader just pauses for a moment and takes in that it wasn’t just hard work that got them there - yes they learned to receive, set and spike, but they learned to connect to each other too. And I just love that the word “connect” has been bolded in both versions of the quote - its importance has been there all along, we just weren’t really aware of it yet.

The last page of the quote then shifts back to the game, and we get to see the results of Hinata and Kageyama’s connection specifically. The panelling here is some of my favorite in the whole series, the way the freak quick is portrayed is just phenomenal. Kageyama and Hinata separated by the break in the panel so we can see both of the faces, but the ball is the same. It makes us feel like they aren’t really separated at all, and using the ball as a visual representation of their connection I think is so simple and so powerful, AND it doubles as just a practical effect to show us how fast the ball had to move to get there.

The quote ends with the bit about attacking, and of course, they scored, but at this point it’s become clear that it was never really about that. It’s about the connections they made that allowed them the opportunity to score in the first place. Through each other, and everyone else they’ve met along the way, they got to keep playing.

This is also the first time we’ve seen the net since the match started, and when we do see it, it’s from the angle of Hinata’s eye as he looks over the top of it. Which, imo is another direct reference to the next quote from the very first chapter: “The view from the top. It’s something I could never ever see on my own. But maybe... just maybe... if I wasn’t alone... I might be able to see it.” The proof is all right there. He isn’t alone anymore, he can see the view from the top and he’s seeing it from the highest level in the world.

[jinnie-forthe-winnie]

Partners

Taehyun fluff

Word count: 1.9k

Sana had taken her seat at the front of the class beside her best friends, Hyuna and May. Her friends handed her a snack they had been raving about all week from the vending machine.

Popping one of the cookie balls in her mouth she looks at the schedule on the board. It seemed as per usual, except there was a long work period in the part of the day.

“They are good,” Sana says, pleasing her friends with her answer.

“Well I guess this could be a new weekly treat for us!” May says stealing the snack bag from Sana, taking half the contents of the bag in her hand. Sana rolls her eyes and turns to her friend Hyuna who was doodling in her own world.

“Hey Earth To Hyuna!” Sana says, tapping her pen down near her page. She successfully gets her friends' attention.

“What project are we working on today?” Sana asks, worried she forgot one.

“Probably a new one, and looks like it is in pairs.” She says pointing to the numbers going down the chalkboard, 13, the exact split of the class.

“Damn it, I’m the one left out this time aren’t I?” Sana asks exasperated.

“Yes you are, sucks to suck doesn’t it Sana” May happily calls from her other side.

“Hey don’t use my sayings against me!” She cries back with a pouty face. May brings her hand up and pats her chin.

“I’m sorry my baby.” She says bringing a pout to her own face. Rolling her eyes she then slouches in her chair, upset over having to find a new partner.

It normally meant she would have to work with one of the dumb kids, or the super shy kids, which never made a good duo for her since she already was shy.

The only other people she would be willing to work with are Huening Kai and Taehyun. Although Taehyun is pushing it, due to her big fat crush on him. Huening Kai would definitely be the better of the two. But that wasn’t going to happen, the two were always a pair. The two are seen together all the time, probably due to them both being in a boy group.

The first half of the day goes by without any hitches. But now it is the the fourth quarter of the day Sana is getting nervous about her partner. She never normally liked working with other people, but she knew that it wasn’t an option in this class since the teacher was very strict about it.

Her friends trade places so Sana is on the far right, and May is in the middle. This allows the two to be first to pick. The teacher had always done the same picking process, starting from the first desk she moves like a snake asking for your partner. This is probably why most of the shy people sat in the very back left corner. If it weren’t for her friends Sana would be sitting with them too.

“Well students, I will explain the new project and then you will get all paired up.” The teacher says gaining the attention of the class. “You are to make a presentation about a pop culture icon, and explain the effects they had on their industry, their culture, and any ideas or causes they believe in. A full description and outline will be found online. This will be due next week on Friday.” She ends her speech and moves to the chalkboard, calling out the first student's name.

The project seems easy enough, there are plenty of options, and plenty that you knew a lot about. You had no idea who would be your partner so you planned on passing once it got to you.

“Hyuna and I are a pair,” May calls out after her name is called. The teacher writes their names and moves on to Huening Kai who sits directly behind you all along with Taehyun.

“Huening Kai?” The teacher yells out.

“Han and I are a pair,” he calls out to the teacher. Sana’s head spins around in confusion to Huening Kai, not taking the chance to look at Taehyun.

From beside Sana the two girls giggle trying not to look at her. “What’s so funny?” Sana asks, laying her down on her desk looking at her friends' faces.

“Nothing, just thank us later, and thank Huening as well.” Hyuna says winking at Sana.

“What are you talking about?” She asks, confused.

“Taehyun?” The teacher calls out. His face is red as he gets ready to reply.

“Ah I’m pairing up with Sana” he says, Sana head turns around this time going to Taehyun. His face was tomato red, which is the colour Sana’s would soon be.

“Your welcome” Hyuna and May say as Sana turns back and sets her head on the desk.

“I hate both of you” she says annoyed, yet almost thankful, not that she’d let her friends know that.

“You won’t be saying that when you start snogging next week” Hyuna replies quietly.

“Two things, I won’t be snogging him, and you need to stop reading Harry Potter, who says snogging!” Sana whisper yells over to her.

“Oh shove off” Hyuna says successfully making them all laugh.

Not even ten minutes later Sana is standing beside Taehyun in the hallway off to the library. Both silent as they walk together. As they enter the library Taehyun makes for the computers, but stops as he feels an arm grab his upper arm.

He softly turns to loon at her, her hand is pointing to a part of the library he’d never ventured. “It quiet back there and I have a laptop we can use instead” she says pulling his arm lightly towards the direction where she wants to go.

Normally that spot was occupied by the trio, but the other two had gone to another part of the library letting Sana know that it’s all for her and Tae. As they pass through shelves of books, he noticed they are in the historical fiction section. The one section that hardly ever gets used, except for history projects, but only when you have to have a book reference.

No one is in the aisles, Sana finds the back corner and let’s go of Taehyun. She sets her bag down, she grabs the shelf that is on wheels and moves it up. She moves her arm in a way that tells him to go inside. Behind the last tall book shelf there is a rather larger gap. There were cushions and some supplies obviously left by the trio from other projects.

“We found this spot two years ago, be glad you’re the fourth person in here.” She says sitting down on the cushion, pulling out her laptop.

“It’s nice back here” he says following along and sitting on a cushion.

“We’ve slowly been bringing things back here to make it better, we’re just trying not to get caught and have it cleared out.” Sana says looking at him.

“They should make this an actual book nook, it’s comforting” he says sliding the cushion over to beside her.

“Yeah that can happen after we graduate, for now this is our spot” she says to him, he smiles at her and holds her gaze. The two hold eye contact for a moment before they both realize what they are doing.

“Ah who would you like to the project on?” He asks her leaning back against the wall.

“Maybe Bangtan, most people will do Western Artists so maybe we can have a project no one else is doing” she says fiddling with her keyboard. “If that is alright with you” she asks meeting his gaze once again.

“Yeah, I could always see if I could ask them a few questions” he says.

“Oh yeah I forgot your from the same company” she says smiling. “How is your group doing right now any way?”

“We’re doing good, We are writing for our bee comeback for next year.” He says with a smile on his face. “I’ll give you a hint on one song, you know new rules?” She nods her head eagerly, “ well I suppose I wrote a sequel to it.” He smiles when he sees her clap her hands in excitement.

“So it’s either, old rules, more rules, broken rules or maybe no rules!” She says happily, “you know new rules is by far my favourite song of yours right?” He nods, though he doesn’t tell her he wanted to make the song for her, since he had always heard her singing it around the school.

By the start of the week they were both done the project, they were just waiting on Bts to send them a blurb for their presentation. Now that they were done they spent the work periods in the nook alone. Often times talking about his group and your dreams.

He couldn’t help his feelings for Sana as she told him about why she wanted to be a teacher. She looked so happy talking about it, which made the smile grow on his face. Their moods seems to be based solely on the others mood.

As Sana finished her story she noticed his genuine smile on his face looking at her. This made her blush and turn away looking at the bookshelf in front of them.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She asks him without looking at him.

It is now his turn to blush, “i think its sweet how passionate you are about it, it makes me smile” he says putting his hand on her knee.

This makes her turn back to him, her eyes meet his. They both slowly start leaning in without thinking. As they close in her eyes flutter closed as she waits for impact. He takes this as a chance to move his body to get a better angle, his right arm is holding him against the wall, his left hand going to the back of her head.

Their lips hardly touch, for a couple seconds they hover over each others lips. Gaining confidence Taehyun moves his face forward enough for your lips to be fully planted against each other.

Slowly their lips move together into a kiss, an awkward one since both of them have a big smile on their face. Once their smiles tame down they continue softly kissing in the back of the library.

Breaking apart they look each other in the eyes, Sana breaks into a fit giggles seeing his silly smile on his face.

“I know I should take you out dates before I ask you this, but would you like to be my girlfriend?” He asks moving his hand from the back of her head and down to her cheek.

She nods and moves in to peck his lips, holding it for a moment before moving back. “Yes, I’d like to be your girlfriend Tae” she says putting her head onto his shoulder. His head moves and rests on hers.

“Oh my god they were snogging May!” Hyuna’s voice comes from the other side of the bookshelf. Huening Kai, Hyuna, and May, all pop up from the ground and move to the moveable shelf, peering over to see the two. The couple blushes, she hides her face in his chest as he puts his face into her hair.

“They’re so cute!” They all say high fiving each other.

[king-paimon]

Houseki no Kuni Chapter 94 Thoughts: Inheriting the burden

This chapter was worth the two month wait. And to be honest, I’m kind of glad that we didn’t get this chapter last month because, if you saw my previous post, October had been very hard for me for several reasons. 

But yeah, this chapter... So short but impactful. And heartbreaking, as usual. I’m still surprised by how some of the things in my old prediction from over a year ago happened, but the results are more gut-wrenching. One of main differences being that Adamant was actually happy to go and the other is Phos being alive, though clearly dead inside now. If you’re interested in seeing this post, here’s a link: https://king-paimon.tumblr.com/post/188597157145/hnk-theoretical-ending-worst-case-scenario

Anyways, this chapter is very straightforward and I don’t have a lot to talk about so this post won’t be super long. Like always, feel free to share your own thoughts with me and I apologize for mistakes I’ll surely make. I’m definitely going to make edits on this one. (I did make some edits. I hope you read them!)

Goodbye Adamant

(Chapter 94, Page 03)

Sigh. Seeing Adamant disappear the way he did was very sad, and also tranquil, in a way. It looks like it was true that after everything he went through, from watching humanity die to watching his precious gems be taken time and time again because of him, and him being unable to fulfill his true purpose, he had been wanting to disappear for a long time. And finally, Phos was the one who liberated him, even though it was definitely not intentional. I talk more about this in depth in the post for Chapter 93: https://king-paimon.tumblr.com/post/631282595252043776/hnk-chapter-93-bittersweet-victory-bittersweet

Also mentioned in that post, I made a prediction that when Adamant crumbles, all that would be left was an eye. This was based off of several observations of him in the previous chapters and for a while, an eye would be associated with him, like him holding onto Phos’s eye or the first machine’s eye. I can’t believe it actually happened. I was loosing it when I saw the first leaks.

Now Adamant’s eye is part of the Phos’s new ‘human’ form, and it’s showing Phos these horrifying visions. Just like when Phos inherited Lapis Lazuli’s head and Cinnabar’s mercury, it looks like Phos inherited Adamant’s memories and those scenes were likely memories of humanity’s destruction. I wonder if these visions also somehow alludes to the possibility that this destruction might happen again.

One thing that has me a little perplexed was his final words to Phos. At first, I thought it was nice that his last words were words of encouragement... But I looked again and he said to Phos that they should “pray wholeheartedly for happiness.”  Was Adamant specifying to Phos to pray for their own happiness or for everyone else’s? Like, did he also envision Phos taking over his role? I hope not. I don’t know, but I want to think that Adamant was wishing Phos luck in finding peace. I hope I’m just over thinking this page, in fact, I’m sure I am. But let me know what you guys think!

I’m a little disappointed that we didn’t get to see Adamant and Aechmea interact directly. Maybe Ms. Ichikawa would find a way, since it looks like the lunarians collected Adamant’s remains, but we’ll see.

But yeah; Adamant is now free from the burden of existing. But sadly, and predictably, that burden is now Phos’s.

Inheriting the burden

It looks like it all but verbally confirmed now: Aechmea’s true goal for Phos was for them to take over Adamant’s role as the one to pray. And it was fascinating how even though Aechmea didn’t say a thing in this chapter, he continues to show how methodical and conniving he is. What an amazing antagonist he is.  Hopefully he’ll talk the next time we see him. Maybe he’ll try to manipulate Phos into thinking that taking over Adamant’s position is a good thing for them, maybe play on Phos’s old desire to find their purpose. But I’m also fine if he doesn’t. I’m glad that it’s becoming clear to Phos that Aechmea was just using them once again, but this time the price of their actions have permanent consequences. 

(Edit: In addition to Phos becoming Adamant’s replacement for praying, it’s understandable to predict that Phos would somehow take up Adamant’s other role; a leader for the gems. Who knows how this would happen. Maybe new gems will come to be while Phos is alone on Earth, or the other gems somehow come back, though I have doubts right now and you’ll see why in the next paragraph. Either way, Phos would find themselves ironically taking over Adamant’s role amongst the gems. And to make it more ironic, what would happen if another gem were to take up Phos’s old role and cause this whole cycle to repeat again. Wouldn’t that be tragic? Or maybe it’d be an opportunity to prevent the same mistakes Adamant made? Or maybe it just shows how history is doomed to repeat itself, no matter what? Who knows. This was a thought that I original had when the leaks came out but I removed it after the translation was released because I thought it wouldn’t be possible anymore. But seeing other people make similar predictions gave me the inspiration to add this edit. I wonder if anyone will notice...)

As for what Aechmea’s plans are for the shattered gems? I think he’s going to dispose of them. I highly doubt Aechmea’s going to rebuild those gems, unless he’s somehow persuaded by the remaining moon gems but that’s very unlikely. He purposely didn’t fulfill his promise to Phos to restore other gems, and if he can convince Phos to pray for him and everyone else, there’d be no point to rebuilding them anyway. I think he’s taking them so Phos would isolated again. He’s used this tactic many times make it easy for him to manipulate Phos and I’m sure he’s going to do it again to convince Phos to pray. Speaking of which...

And there’s no one left....

(Chapter 94, Page 23)

Look how far this poor child has fallen. So different from how they were in the previous chapters, from a hellbent vengeance beast to this being of pure sadness and desperation. I’ve stated many times that at the end of this sugar coated vengeance crusade, reality would hit Phos right back in the face and push Phos to rock bottom. And it happened. And it was so sad to watch. 

Ms. Ichikawa did such a good job emulating the sense of emptiness, despair, and desperation in this chapter. Everything, especially the school, looks so big and empty now that there’s no one there but Phos. And Phos’s face and demeanor as they looked everywhere for the fallen gems and Adamant, when they desperately grasped for Adamant’s eye because “they want happiness” and when he witnessed those visions was the icing on the cake. 

Poor Phos. Everything is out of their grasp again, but this time, there’s nothing to turn back too. He wanted to restore the gems, but they are all taken away, likely forever. He wanted Adamant to pray for him, but he’s also gone forever. Phos sacrificed so much to get to this point; Phos destroyed their relationships, their former allies, their own BODY to try to find a solution this situation they were put in. They did all of this not just for everyone else’s sake but for their own sake, so they can finally have some control over his life. So he can be happy. But once again, it all led to this situation that he has no control over. Phos now knows that he was once again used as a pawn for Aechmea’s grand plan and it looks like there’s no way out of it. No one’s there to save him.

The only other gems that aren’t destroyed are Yellow Diamond, Goshe, Ame, and Cairn. And at the bottom of the last page, it sounds like we’ll be focusing on the moon gems in the next chapter. What’ll happen with them? No clue. But honestly, I don’t care right now. 

Phos is alone again, but it’s absolute now.

Adamant is gone. Cinnabar is gone. Padparadscha is gone. Any gems or Admirabilis that gave an ounce of care for Phos are no longer on earth. 

There’s no one left. 

All Phos has now are tragic memories that are not their own and the feeling of despair. 

And if that’s not lonely enough, if Phos were to pray, it’s highly likely that they’ll be the only one left behind while everyone else permanently disappears. That’s how it was for Adamant, after all. And just like Adamant, Phos would continue this painful existence, sacrificing parts of themselves for others, and no one’s there to save them. 

So it doesn’t matter how the situation will turn out; in the end, Phos doesn’t win and will be all alone. 

(edit: It’s also fascinating to see how similar Phos and Adamant really are, from the loneliness of knowing the truth of everything to watching the ones they care about be taken away from them and being practically powerless to do anything to change it. These two characters are so tragic.)

I said this many times before and I’ll keep on saying it until something changes:

Phos’s cycle of suffering is never going to end.

Phos will never have a happy ending.

[gogtopia]

after doomsday (~1.3k)

time traveller!Karl returns to the time he belongs in and is faced with the ruins of L’Manberg, having not been here since the day before the festival. (ft some karlnapity)

NOTE: this work takes place within the dream smp roleplay. i do not ship/write fic about the actual creators, only the characters they play

Karl’s breath returned to him all at once as he popped back into the correct place in time, book clutched to his chest. He still hadn’t been able to get used to this time travel thing super well and had been popping into the wrong time over and over. But he had gotten it right this time; he was sitting in Church Prime, after all.

He went to head home, back to L’Manberg, and he lost his breath all over again. Because what laid before him was not the home that he’d left behind. It wasn’t much of anything at all other than a seemingly bottomless pit with ash still floating in the wind. The obsidian structures in the sky painted a sinister picture. Whatever happened here, it wasn’t some random accident. It was an intentional attack on his home.

How long had he been gone? The last thing he remembered before traveling through time was working with Ranboo to fix up the country for the upcoming festival, an event designated to celebrate L’Manberg as a nation. When had all of that fallen apart?

Who had fallen with it?

Karl wasn’t sure exactly where to go at first. He didn’t know who would be left standing if anyone was at all. Maybe they’d be gathered back at Eret’s castle. But, then again, if L’Manberg had fallen victim to an attack like this, the Dream SMP as a nation was probably the most likely culprit. He didn’t want to walk directly into his own execution. He didn’t think that Eret would be so cruel but, given what had become of his home, he wasn’t sure what to think.

He made his way toward El Rapids instead. His other home, though they had never really gotten very far in building it. Sparing one more glance back to the crater where L’Manberg once stood, Karl smiled half-heartedly. At least, after all of this, his Pokimane statue still stood.

As he passed through Boomerville, he was astounded at how many things seemed the same. It was like L’Manberg had been wiped off the map and everything else had simply remained frozen in time. Had he somehow fucked up time with the book?

“Karl!” a voice called out.

He turned to see Lazar peeking his head out of his home. He looked old, but that wasn’t really unusual. The fact that he was alive at all was a good sign.

“What the honk happened?” he asked him.

“Your guess is as good as mine,” he replied with a shrug. “Vikk and I were out on a mining trip for two days and we come back and a whole bloody country is gone. I think H was there but he’s passed out in his place right now. Must have been some festival, I guess.”

Two days. That meant that he wasn’t so far off in time that everybody was gone. Unless… No. He didn’t want to think about that.

“Where is everybody?” he asked Lazar.

“No fucking clue,” he replied. “We didn’t get back that long ago. I assume they’re taking shelter in other places in the server or are off building places in the wilderness. I thought you’d know. Where have you been?”

He thought about the book in his hand and how the pages had been slowly filling. “It’s really hard to explain. But I think that I should go.”

Lazar followed his glance toward El Rapids. “Yeah, go on, mate. If nobody’s around, you’re free to sleep on my floor or something. Just don’t steal any more of my shit.”

“Thanks,” he said with an absent nod before continuing toward El Rapids.

For all that they’d done to secure the validity of El Rapids, it wasn’t much. It was a pretty small plot of land, though they claimed a few other spots to be part of the country proper, and only really consisted of two buildings: the pyramid and a smaller building that he still wasn’t sure the purpose of.

“Hello!” he called out absently as he got closer, hoping for a response and not expecting one at the same.

“Karl?” came Quackity’s voice in response and he breathed a sigh of relief.

“We’re in the pyramid,” Sapnap added.

They were here. They were safe, and they were here.

He ran into the pyramid, dodging the creepers and spiders that always seemed to reside inside, and made his way into the small redstone room in the center of it, where he found his fiances sitting together on the ground, covered in ash as they patched each other up.

Sapnap was scratched up but looked pretty okay overall. Quackity, however, didn’t seem to be doing as well, with bandages all over and haphazard stitches that were probably done by Sapnap on his forehead. He wasn’t in good shape and would probably have to pay Ponk a visit to get patched up in the morning, but there didn’t appear to be any immediate danger to his health.

He felt like an asshole, standing there without a scratch on him as the men he loved had clearly fought very hard in the past two days.

“Where were you?” Quackity asked and Karl braced for the impact of his yelling for missing out on whatever had happened.

“Were you safe?” he asked instead.

His shoulders relaxed. “Yeah, I was safe.”

“Wherever you were, you missed a lot,” Sapnap told him.

“George fucking missed it too,” Quackity complained. “We come back to Sapnap’s base for supplies afterward and he’s fucking sleeping. At least he didn’t get hurt, though. We came back here after so that you’d be able to find us.”

“Did something happen at the festival?” he asked.

Sapnap and Quackity shared a resigned glance.

“Look, L’Manberg is gone, that much is over. And as far as I know, everyone made it out,” Quackity told him. “I know what I think we should do going forward, even if everyone seems to have a different idea about how to approach it. Either way, the ash is still settling and for tonight, we can take a goddamn break.” “And what’ll we do tomorrow?”

“I have no fucking clue,” Quackity said with a shrug. “Regroup, I guess. All I know is that, in the end, we can’t let Dream continue doing this shit. We have to take him down.”

Karl turned his gaze to Sapnap, who he expected to push back against this point of view, even after everything that had happened between him and his friend.

But instead, a fire burned in his eyes. “He needs to know that he’s not invincible. The Dream that destroyed L’Manberg isn’t the guy I became best friends with ages ago or, fuck, maybe he was and I never saw it before. I’m not going to let the entire server suffer just because he used to care about me.”

“And what about George?”

Quackity let out a bitter laugh and shook his head. “George doesn’t give a shit about anything. He won’t fight for us, not about the serious stuff. But, at this point, he’s not about to fight for Dream either. I think I speak for the group when I say that we have his back, no matter what, but I don’t know if he has ours.”

“I think, if it came down to a choice between us and Dream, George would choose us,” Sapnap said quietly. “Dream hurt him too. But if he doesn’t want to fight, let’s not force him into the fray.”

“You’ll fight with us, right Karl?” Quackity asked.

And, well, Karl was never much of a fighter in any shape or form. He lacked the physical skill and training that Sapnap did and didn’t have a scrap of the political talent that Quackity was able to weaponize. In the end, Karl was just a guy, but he was a guy that knew who he cared about.

“I will,” he promised.

“So, are you gonna tell us what that book is about?” Quackity asked.

He smiled brightly. “Would it be okay if I told the two of you a story?”

The tension in the air dissipated ever so slightly as his fiances looked at him with soft smiles of adoration.

“Of course, Karl,” Sapnap said. “Tell us a story.”

[padfootagain]

A Very Rose Mistake (IV)

Part 4: How You Became Lambkin

 Here we go for a new chapter! This is cute, but also, an important chapter for many reasons! The plot is now starting to unfold!!

No warnings of any kind to apply here, really, it's just rather innocent and cute. I hope you like this new chapter! Tell me what you think about it!

Word Count: 3911

I

Holmes Chapel, 2007

 Shakespeare was a pain.

Maybe it was still relevant if you went to the theatre and saw professionals actually perform the play, but from the point of view of two 13 years old who had to read the plays for school… it was a pain.

Besides the language being old, there was also the fact that tons of the words on the page had just been made up. Or at least, it sounded that way. Because Harry had most certainly never heard any of those being used before and he had better things to do with his time than try and guess the meaning of these words. Playing football was one of them. And there was no way his mother would let him out of the house before he would have finished his homework.

There was only one way he could get to the pitch on time to play tonight with his friends. He had to ask for the help of the brightest mind he knew.

He got up from his bed where he was lying down with his copy of Henry V covering his face. He let the book fall on his bed while he reached for the piece of red glass that rested on the side of his window. He aimed at the sun, until the reflection of the light on the glass would dance over your own window. The perks of having his best friend living in the house right next to his: it was easy to reach you.

And indeed, it took you less than a minute to appear before you would appear on the other side of your own window. He couldn't help but grin at the sight.

Harry grabbed a piece of cardboard from behind his desk, that he had already prepared. One of the messages that you often used and both had kept, ready, just in case you would need them.

Help with homework?

He saw you laughing and shaking your head, but you grabbed your own cardboard, large enough to hide you completely behind it.

My place?

He merely nodded with a big goofy grin on his face, before grabbing his bag, his book and heading to the living room.

"Mum!" he called, thumping through the hall.

"Yes, I am not deaf," Anne laughed at her son.

"Can I go over to Y/N's to do my homework with her?"

"To do your homework or play videogames?"

"I have a match tonight."

"Ha… so it's really for homework then! Sure, you can go. Bring some snacks if you want, I bought some cookies, the ones she likes."

"Thanks mum! I'll go directly to the field when I'm done…"

"No, you won't. You're going to come back here to drop off your stuff and to get changed and then you'll go to the field."

He heaved a sigh, but complied without arguing.

"Okay. Bye!"

"Love you!"

But Harry was already slamming the front door shut and sprinting towards your house. Your mother was waiting for him with her door open and an amused smile on her face.

"Hello, Harry! How are you today?"

"Great! Thank you, Mrs. Y/L/N!"

"Y/N's in her bedroom. Do you want to bring up some snacks?"

"I've brought some cookies my mum bought today."

"How nice! Well, go ahead then!"

"Thanks!"

He took off his shoes, placing them in the space that was saved for him in the hall, before sprinting up the stairs to your room.

He closed the door behind him.

"Hey! Thanks, I'm struggling with this bloody play!"

You merely chuckled, resting your back against your wall as you sat on your bed.

"It's alright, I haven't started that one yet."

"Have you done maths already?"

"Yep! Just finished."

"Me too. But that English stuff… ugh…"

He climbed on your bed by your side, dragging behind him his notebook, pencils and his Shakespearean play.

Harry gave you some time to catch up with him on the assignment, although he hadn't done much yet. You then spent some time trying to analyse the text and answer the questions on your assignment about the scene.

Harry was annoyed to say the least.

"What are these words, even…" he groaned.

"Come on… some are cute… 'lambkin', that's cute!"

"Lambkin?! You think calling your girlfriend lambkin is cute?"

"I do. It's sweet!"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"Alright, then, I'll call you that from now on. We'll see for how long you find it cute."

You exploded in laughter, the sound enough to erase his grumpy frown.

"That's not fair! I would be the only one with a ridiculous nickname like that!" you protested.

"You are not calling me lambkin. Ever."

"Alright," you shook your head at his silly remark. "After we're done with this, we'll look for a nickname for you."

"I'm going to the field after, I'm playing with the guys."

"That just means I'll choose whatever I want to laugh at you!"

"Wow… scary… lambkin."

You narrowed your eyes at each other, and you considered his banter as a challenge.

"You're gonna regret that, Styles."

"Oh, am I, lambkin?"

But you could only keep up the serious act for a few more seconds, before you both let go and were lost in a fit of laughter.

You did manage to finish your homework on time for Harry to go play football with the guys. You spent the rest of your allowed time before a screen looking for old and ridiculous nicknames to use against Harry on your computer.

You eventually found the perfect one.

His phone beeped after he was back home, about to go to bed. He had changed in his pyjamas and was about to turn off the lights for the night when the sound rang through the room.

"Harry! Go to bed, you have school tomorrow," Anne ordered, as she was passing by in the corridor right at that moment.

"I am going to bed! It's Y/N!"

"If you're not in bed in five minutes…"

"I am going!"

He checked your text all the same.

Y/N: I've found your nickname. You are chuckaboo.

He snorted, answering once he was buried under his blankets.

Harry: What does that even mean?

He put his phone on silence to avoid his mother hearing your response.

Y/N: It's a term of endearment to call a friend. Fits just right. Plus, I think it suits you, chuckaboo.

Harry: You'd better not call me like that at school.

Y/N: Oh, I will :)

He laughed, despite feigning anger in his next response. You merely replied with another smiley face, and wished him good night.

He went to sleep with an amused smile on his face.

It was just a joke, it would last for a few days before you would both grow tired of it. Stupid nicknames that would make you laugh for a while. Or so he thought, at least.

Lambkin and Chuckaboo.

What a ridiculous pair…

II

Loch Lomond, 2020

Harry kept on holding your hand as you settled around the large table that had been set for your family. The atmosphere was more relaxed as you waited for Amy and her family to join all of you over dinner. Your mom and you sat between your father and Harry, a protection of some sort against the nasty glances that your dad kept on throwing at your fake boyfriend. Dinner was merry, and Amy's family provided a nice distraction for your own family members to focus on. Harry spent most of the evening lost in a deep conversation with Amy's grandfather about 'the music back then', and he seemed to blend in just fine, not that you had ever had any doubt that he would.

One chair though had been left empty. In the large hall decorated with flickering lights, the view upon the loch growing darker and darker as the hours passed, until there was nothing left to see but the stary sky, there was one empty spot. It was for one of Amy's cousins, who had to work late at the hospital in Glasgow, where he worked as a nurse, apparently. Patrick, was his name, and he was set to sit right opposite you. It's only when you were waiting for dessert that he appeared.

And you struggled quite a bit to hide your reaction.

Because Patrick was handsome. Patrick was very handsome. Patrick was also 1000% your type.

And Patrick was set right across from you around the long, rectangular table.

He gave a kiss to his family, was introduced properly by an Amy that was on her way to getting from tipsy to drunk, and he seemed a little embarrassed by her antiques as she praised him for his work in medicine and called all who were single around the table to 'give him a ring'. And you found it cute.

You decided it was your duty, as you were the person sitting across from him, to make some small talk. Anyway, your parents were entertaining a conversation of their own that you weren't particularly interested in, and Harry and Amy's grandfather were lost in a vivid argument about Carole King's best song on Tapestry.

"I'm Y/N!" you introduced yourself with a welcoming smile. "Cassie's cousin."

"Oh, so we're the cousins then! Nice to meet you!" he greeted you with a warm smile as well.

And he had a nice smile. Very nice smile, indeed…

"So… you're a nurse then!"

He ran a hand in his hair, embarrassed.

"Yeah, I am. Sorry about her rant, I think she's had too much to drink."

"It's her wedding, I reckon she has the right to have a little fun."

"I guess. And what do you do for a living?"

You were interrupted by the dessert arriving, and you waited for the waiters to have left to answer.

"I'm studying for a PhD in history."

"Oh, wow."

He seemed genuinely impressed, which was always nice to hear. You waited for the next question to strike what do you do with a PhD in history, but it didn't come. Instead he asked another question, seeming genuinely interested.

"What is your thesis about?"

"The influence and impact of the XIXth century international exchanges and relations on modern politics."

"Wow."

"It's a mouthful," you joked, nodding your head.

"No, no! It sounds very interesting! Where do you study."

"California. But before that I got my degree in Oxford."

"Dear God… I'm sitting in front of the next Nobel Prize."

You laughed, shying away.

"No, absolutely not. Besides, I don't even think there is one to congratulate historians."

"A shame. I would have bet on you."

You did notice the way he shot you a shy smile. And you did notice the way he didn't look away, and didn't look for another conversation to settle into. He was focused on you while you ate your dessert, and you did the same.

Your conversation went on when the coffees and teas were served. And you had to admit that you liked it that way. He was charming, with a cute Scottish accent, and eyes that glimmered in the yellowish light of the room.

It's only when your cup of coffee was empty that Harry took your hand in his again, planting your feet right back to Earth, and reminding you of what you were here for in the first place.

He gave you a smile, before guiding your hand up to his lips to place a kiss over your knuckles, surprising you with the tender gesture and making your heart rush a little more as he looked at you with the tenderest of gazes.

"Are you tired, babe? Or would you like to take a walk with me? I could use some fresh air."

Your heart stumbled a little at the pet name, and you didn't like it. You didn't like it one bit, so you forced the organ to stop its little dance.

"Sure."

You bid everyone a good night -and did notice the disappointed look Patrick gave you as you abruptly ended your conversation in order to leave with Harry - and some other people retreated to their rooms at the same time as you, while you followed Harry outside.

It was cold outside, a heavy wind sweeping skeleton leaves to gather at your feet. You could hear the shushed rumble of conversations on the other side of the windows and the wind caught in the branches and lifting the water of the loch in clapping waves. Harry offered you his arm, and as you noticed that you could still be seen from the table inside, you took it with a grateful smile.

You walked along the shore in silence for a few minutes, your gaze distracted from the dark path by the shining lights above your head, but you weren't worried about falling, not when you were holding Harry's arm. He would catch you before you could fall.

He finally heaved a sigh.

"Well, that wasn't a complete disaster. It went better later on, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I reckon that once the shock had passed, it was alright," you nodded.

"Except for you father, of course. Judging by the way he was eyeing me all night, he probably will try to cut off my balls before the end of the week."

You laughed at that, the sound clear and joyful, luminous over the dark scenery that surrounded you. But the reflexions of the stars over the water was lovely all the same. They seemed brighter to Harry as your laughter echoed a little longer around both of you.

"He's not so fond of the idea. Don't know why."

Harry shrugged.

"Must think I'm not good enough for you."

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head.

"Anyway… I think we're getting away with it."

"Getting the hang of it, babe?"

"Oh, shut up, chuckaboo."

"Ha, here you are again, back to your normal self. Will you start punching me next?"

"I've never punched you!"

"But you've threatened to do so dozens of times."

"I am very good at boxing."

His smile grew more tender, a little melancholic as well, but you attributed it to the quiet of the place that surrounded you. You were away from the lodge now, enough so for voices to have disappeared. It was only you, Harry, and the whisper of autumn leaves now.

"You're good at everything, Y/N."

There was a moment of silence, while you stared at him. But then, his expression grew a little mischievous, and he faked to be lost in thought.

"Except at cooking, and singing, and playing guitar, and most definitely climbing, and gymnastics, and…"

"Yeah, okay, I get it, you jerk!" you stopped him, punching his arm, although your gesture wasn't violent enough to hurt. Still, Harry dramatically held his arm as if you had thrown him your stronger uppercut.

"See, I knew it! Knew you would end up doing it for real, instead of only threatening me with your punches!"

"Well, you should shut up before I do it again."

"You're so cruel, lambkin," he tried to sound convincing, but the goofy smile upon his lips betrayed his thoughts.

You shook your head at him, wheezing.

You walked in silence for a little longer, before deciding to go back to the lodge. You were still holding Harry's arm, even if no one was around to see the two of you pretend. None of you acknowledge the fact, merely choosing to act as if you weren't. Maybe, a voice in your mind explained it by acting in case someone would bump into the two of you. You knew it wasn't the truth though, but you pretended that it was for the few minutes more that the gesture lasted while you walked on the edge of the water and under the tall trees.

"So… Patrick?" Harry asked after a long silence.

"He's nice!" you answered with a smile. "He's a nice chap!"

"Hmm," Harry nodded. "You did seem to have fun with him tonight. Even thought that maybe you didn't need my services anymore."

"Pfft! Don't be ridiculous! I've just talked with him for 5 minutes."

"Almost an hour, actually."

You narrowed your eyes at him.

"You counted?"

He rolled his eyes at you.

"I just noticed it was a long conversation."

"Hmm…"

"You know, we can still tell the truth to everyone, and you can take your shot with Patrick."

You didn't know how to describe the tone he used to say the man's name, but it wasn't oozing with fondness, that was for certain. You looked at him suspiciously, a smirk creeping its way to your lips.

"Are you… jealous?"

"Jealous? Me?"

"You're the jealous type, don't deny it."

"And don't flatter yourself. We're not really together, remember? Why would I be jealous."

"I don't know, but you sound like you are."

"I'm not jealous."

"Good."

"But do you like him?"

You shrugged.

"I don't know. I think he's attractive. I think he's nice. So…"

"You like him."

"He's alright so far. And he is my type."

Harry raised an eyebrow, before his features molded into a frown instead. His mind couldn't help but compare himself to Patrick, and point out everything that was different between them.

"Am I your type?" he asked after a long silence.

You laughed, taken aback.

"What kind of question is that?"

He shrugged.

"I don't know. Just wondering. I'm playing your boyfriend for a week, but… would I be your type? Had I not met you when we were five and crashed your ice-cream into your face… had you met me tonight instead of Patrick… would you have thought that I was your type?"

You looked away, finally letting go of his arm, and the lack of contact between your two bodies made Harry regret his question.

"I don't know," you lied, before finding back your composure, and shooting him a smile. "But you're my boyfriend for this week. So for the next seven days, you are most definitely my type, honey."

He laughed, shaking his head. You had walked back to the lodge, and he opened the door for you, dramatically bowing before you to let you through first.

"After you, my love."

Harry went first to take a shower, and then it was your turn. Some warm water was just what your tired muscles needed to relax after your busy day. When you walked out of the bathroom, a little bit of fog following you through the door, Harry was lying on the bed, atop the blankets, scrolling on his phone.

He had changed into a comfortable jumper and a pair or pyjama pants that seemed warmed and soft. His curls were still damped, wetting his pillow, but he didn't seem to mind it at all.

He looked up when you stepped out of the bathroom though, and you didn't fail to notice the way his eyes settled on your legs before hurrying to your face while his cheeks blushed.

Your pyjama shorts weren't that short at all, stopping right above your knees. Still, it seemed enough to make Harry's cheekbones and ears turn crimson. You wore an old Treat People With Kindness jumper too, matching his grey hoodie.

"You're alright, Harry?" you asked, rather puzzled by his reaction.

"Sure, why?"

"You're blushing."

"I'm not."

"You are."

"It's nothing. I'm just tired."

You weren't convinced, but chose to drop the subject, your own fatigue weighing on you. So you shrugged instead, finishing to get ready for bed.

You slipped under the covers and heaved a sigh as your head hit the pillow.

"Tired?" he asked, and you could only hum and nod in response.

He hesitated for a second, while you closed your eyes.

"There's an extra blanket. I can sleep on top of the covers, and you under them, if you want."

You opened your eyes again to look at him.

"Would that make you feel more comfortable?"

He considered your question, and shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe?"

"I don't really care. But… maybe for tonight, you can do that. Won't you be cold though?"

"It's quite warm in here. And the blanket looks cosy."

"Alright, but don't hesitate to get under the covers if you're too cold. I don't mind if you do."

"Okay," he nodded, before getting up to get the blanket.

He lied down by your side again, getting comfortable, before he would turn off the lamp on his nightstand, and you did the same, letting darkness take over every inch of the room, looking darker than it really was as your eyes got used to the shadows.

"Goodnight Harry."

"Goodnight, Y/N."

You turned to your side, trying to get comfortable too, and your foot gently bumped into his through the layers of sheets and blankets as you moved.

"Sorry," you quipped, moving your foot away.

"'S okay," he replied, his voice lower than usual.

You let silence settle for a while, but it felt strange. Awkward. There was something unspoken hovering above the two of you, you could cut the tension in the air with a knife.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

"I feel weird."

"Weird? You mean sick?" he asked with worry in his tone now.

"No, I mean… it's a little weird sleeping next to you. Why though? We've done that since we were six."

He shrugged, but couldn't deny that he was feeling the same. His heart was beating so fast, he was worried you would hear it in the silent night.

"Maybe it's because we're not children anymore," he whispered.

You hummed in response.

"And we haven't done it in a long time too," you added, and he heard you nodding, your cheek brushing against your pillow.

He took a deep breath before speaking again, his tone hesitant.

"Do you… would you feel better if I took the couch?"

You considered his offer, but shook your head.

"No, I… I don't feel uncomfortable. It's just… strange."

It was his turn to hum.

"Would you feel better on the couch?" you asked him.

"No, it's… it's a nice weird."

"Yeah, it is."

"I'm just… it makes me a little nervous."

"Nervous?"

He made a face, that you couldn't see, but you would have found it adorable if you had.

"I'm afraid I'll wake you up with my snoring. Or speak some nonsense in my sleep. Or you wake up tomorrow morning and see me drooling, with saliva all over my face."

You laughed at him, reaching in the dark to touch his arm. You patted the muscles tenderly.

"Don't worry, chuckaboo. I've seen worse! Seen you throwing up a fair amount of time. Also, I'll just punch you again to wake you up if you start snoring too much."

He laughed, and both of your laughter mingling through the room made most of the tension in the room disappear.

"You're right. Besides, maybe you'll be the one waking me up because of your snoring!" Harry went on.

"I don't snore!" you snorted.

"You do. I've heard you before."

"Well, then, you can wake me up if I do."

You moved your fingers away from his arm, but they lingered on the mattress near him all the same, in the little space between the two of you.

"Sleep well, lambkin," Harry whispered, closing his eyes, and when you answered, you had the same smile on your lips as the one that he wore.

"You too, chuckaboo."

************************************

Taglist : @emcchi​​ @fishstick-knows​​​ @eldahae​​​​ @just-damn-bored​​ @retrouvailessx​​​ @marvelstudies2020​​​ @boxofteenageideas​​@ponycake27​​​​​​​ @horsesreign​​​​​​​ @xinyourdreamsx​​​​​​ @jbluevelvet​​​​​@notkeppeki @daynigt-dreamer-stuff @fudgeflyss​​​​​ @stuckupstucky​​​​​​@snek-shit​​​​​​ @suchatinyinfinity​​​​​​@i-padfootblack-things​  @buckybsarmy @heyohheyitsgabi​​​​​​​@jigsawlover10​​​​​​ @emyyjemyy​​​​ @addictedtofictionalcharacters​​​​​​​​ @staringmoony​​​​​​​@madamrogers​​ @cronias13​​​ @stylesfics-xx​​​​ @mellamolayla​​​​ @mariaenchanted​

[annarosewriting]

hello again

It’s been a while. 

I missed this. 

I missed writing. 

I missed the feeling of having so many thoughts and ideas that my fingers crave a keyboard. Hoping that if I make them physical, it’ll bring me peace of mind. Or others will realize they aren’t alone in this world. 

That’s what I missed most, I think. 

I missed the connection. 

Because that’s all art is. 

Art connects us. It makes us feel less alone. 

I like to think of it as handprints in cement. 

This whole world is just one big square of wet cement. And while we’re all waiting around to die, we’re standing at the edge of this square and thinking “how can I leave my mark on this?” 

It’s overwhelming at times because you know that whatever you put into this cement will last forever. But there’s the added pressure of knowing you only have so much time to leave an impact before the cement dries and it’s too late.  

And how inexplicably human is it to see something that will become permanent and to think “I need to let everyone know I was here.”

When I sit down and write, it’s my imprint into that cold dampness. To leave my own little permanence on this world. It’s gratifying to write and share something and have people say things like “I feel that way too!” 

Maybe my writing will stand the test of time. Maybe one day more than my friends and family will read it. Maybe it’ll touch more people’s lives than I can ever imagine. 

Or maybe someone will read these words years from now and see themselves reflected back and laugh because, god, being human is the same no matter where you are. 

It’s funny to read what I’ve written in the past. Writing is so permanent and not all at once. The most vulnerable you’ll ever be and the most guarded.  

Writing is something where you get to edit, and edit again, and edit some more to make sure every word is perfect. But then you’ll inevitably go back, days, weeks or months later and think “Ah, fuck. That was an idiotic thing to write. What I should have said was...” 

There’s also the control about how much you reveal. I could talk about an incredibly vulnerable topic that affects me directly but could edit it so I wasn’t actually sharing anything of worth. 

But I think that’s unfair. 

Creating, in any way, is a vulnerable practice. Writing especially. I believe you do a disservice to your audience if you’re not writing about what’s important to you, what’s real to you. 

Audience’s are very good at sniffing out what’s disingenuous and what’s not. And I know that I connect more with an author when I can tell what they’ve written was difficult for them to do but ultimately helped them to heal in ways big and small.  

I also think there’s power in being vulnerable. In sharing emotions and experiences that when prodded are still tender. But that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? 

It’s about shouting into this void, the void of the Internet, the void of social media, the void of human existence, to say “I have loved and felt and hurt in this way. Can anyone else commiserate?” 

And someone’s hand pops out of that void like a life raft to say “Yes, I’ve also loved and lost and hurt in this way. You’re not alone in this.”

We forget so easily that humans are sociable creatures by nature. We’re inclined to help each other. To look out for one another and to form connections. 

It’s what makes this existence worth while on this floating rock in space. 

It’s what makes me want to write again. 

It’s what brings me back to blank pages and slogging through first and second and tenth drafts. To writers block and questioning if my writing is even good or worthwhile or will make a difference. 

It’s the hope that someone will see these words in some way and breath a sigh of relief that they aren’t as alone as they thought they were. 

That I can be that helping hand in the vastness of existence to ground someone to reality again.  

I hope that you’ll join me. That you’ll read these words. 

That you’ll hear what I have to say. 

That we can all be vulnerable together. 

I wish I could say I had a theme for what I’ll be writing about. That I have a schedule in mind. That everything I write will be profound and shake the ground with it’s righteousness. 

But I’m just one person. 

And I really like talking about pop culture. And Harry Styles. And Bucky Barnes. 

So, maybe I’ll write about whatever I want to write about.

And maybe that will be enough. 

So.

Hello, again.

I hope you’ll stick around. 

[tigerkirby215]

5e Mordekaiser, the Iron Revenant build (League of Legends)

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

K-POP IS TEMPORARY; IRON STANDS ETERNAL!

Guess I just don’t really want to make nothing but K-Pop builds. Been playing Morde a lot and he’s fun, and Morde in D&D is actually a build I’ve been thinking about for awhile. I don’t have to use Tasha’s content either for this build so I figured I’d make something other than eGirls in anticipation for Pentakill’s comeback album.

Please for the love of god give us a new Pentakill Mordekaiser skin, and actually turn his mace into a guitar!

GOALS

Shed the frailty of flesh; embrace the cold edge of iron - The iron revenant needs iron, with a giant mace and armor that can block even the strongest sword. For iron stands eternal.

In my clutches! - Those who try to flee will be brought back by Death’s Grasp. There is no escaping fate.

Accept your demise - Tired of your foes running? Bring them to a Realm of Death where they’ll have to fight.

RACE

I know that Mordekaiser is technically a revenant but in my continued attempts to make my builds “Adventurer’s League legal” while not using Adventurer’s League rules we’re going to go with a Warforged, because of course we’d pick the race made of metal. As a Warforged your Constitution increases by 2 and you can increase another stat of your choice by 1: bump up your Charisma to be just a little bit scarier.

As iron stands eternal you have Constructed Resilience for advantage against being poisoned, resistance to the poisoned condition, immunity to disease, and no need to eat, drink, or breathe. You also don’t need to sleep and can’t be put to sleep by magic: instead to sleep you enter a Sentry’s Rest, where you stand motionless for hours but are still fully aware of your surroundings.

But most importantly to resist all blows you have Integrated Protection. It flat out increases your AC by 1, and also makes it so that instead of “wearing” armor you integrate it into your body. While the armor is integrated into you it can’t be removed by any means.

Finally you have Specialized Design for a skill, tool, and language of your choice. For your skill I opted for Performance to show that you’re the chosen: you are the guardian, the guardian. (But feel free to take something more practical.) For your tool a Lute is the closest you’ll get to a guitar to lead a Yordle city destroying band. And for your language choose whatever you think the spirits of the dead would speak: I opted for Abyssal personally. Definitely not because Abyssal is the first option alphabetically.

ABILITY SCORES

15; STRENGTH - Iron stands eternal, and iron is heavy.

14; WISDOM - Morde speaks in very sagely ways, and this is a rather big requirement for one of our classes.

13; CHARISMA - Charisma is tied directly to being the scariest revenant around, and indirectly tied to kick-ass guitar solos.

12; CONSTITUTION - Twice slain and thrice reborn doesn’t happen if you’re not a sturdy fella.

10; INTELLIGENCE - Being alive for eons means that you would know a thing or two about history.

8; DEXTERITY - Iron stands eternal, and iron is heavy.

BACKGROUND

There’s a lot of potential backgrounds for Mordekaiser (I honestly really like the Knight background because Retainers are fun) but the most accurate one for abilities and lore would be a Soldier. You gain proficiency in Athletics but I’m going to suggest swapping Intimidation out for History proficiency, since you’re an ancient being who was around for many wars. You also gain proficiency with land vehicles and a gaming set of your choice, both of which don’t matter much: see if you can maybe grab another metal instrument instead.

Your background with a Military Rank means that your followers recognize you as their general (or possibly a lower rank if your DM isn’t a fan of OP level 1 backstories.) They defer to you if they are of lower rank, and you can use your military influence to requisition supplies as needed.

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - PALADIN 1

An oath sworn to death is still an oath. Paladins get proficiency in two skills from the Paladin list: this is where we’ll actually be grabbing Intimidation, and we’ll also take Religion. Yeah turns out that Morde’s obsession with death is actually a religion.

Regardless Paladins at level 1 have Divine Sense. You can spend an action to sense any celestial, fiend, or undead within 60 feet of you that is not behind total cover. You know the type of being but not its identity, and you can also use this ability to determine if an area has been consecrated or desecrated. You can use this feature a number of times equal to your Charisma modifier plus one, and regain all uses at the end of a Long Rest.

You also have some healing for your Indestructible body with Lay on Hands. You have a pool of healing power equal to five times your Paladin level that you can spend to heal anyone you touch (including yourself.) You can spend any number of your remaining hitpoints on the heal, or you can spend 5 hitpoints to cure a disease or neutralize a poison. You can stop multiple poisons and diseases at a time (spending 5 hitpoints for each) but seeing as iron resists poison and disease you should be fine. Your puny allies however may need the help.

Now may also be a good time to mention what weapons and armor to take. For a giant two-handed mace take a Maul, and for heavy armor take heavy armor. For now that will just be Chainmail (granted by default with Paladin starting equipment) but you can transition to Platemail in the future hopefully.

LEVEL 2 - PALADIN 2

Second level Paladins get to choose their Fighting Style to augment their non-abilities. To be completely unbreakable take Defense for another +1 to your AC.

You also get access to Spellcasting. You can prepare a number of spells equal to your Charisma modifier plus half your Paladin level (rounded down.) The main spell we’re here for is Compelled Duel to force foes to face you and make it a lot harder for them to fight. It’s not a full 1v1 dimension but it works pretty well. Other than that if you want some Nashor’s Tooth damage Divine Favor will make your strikes a lot more painful, and if you want even more defense Shield of Faith will block any blow that may come your way.

Of course you can ignore all this and Obliterate your foes with Divine Smite, spending a spell slot and turning into magic Radiant damage. A smite with do 2d8 for a first level slot plus an additional d8 per slot above first, up to a maximum of 5d8 with a 4th level slot. If you hit an undead or fiend however the damage increases by another d8, for a maximum of 6d8.

LEVEL 3 - PALADIN 3

Third level Paladins get Divine Health which literally doesn’t impact you since you’re a Warforged, so instead we’ll talk about your Sacred Oath. As fun and flavorful as an Oathbreaker would be that subclass is kinda... bad? So instead look to the Oath of Conquest to shatter your foes!

You get the Armor of Agathys spell for some Thornmail, and the Command spell for Death’s Grasp. Telling someone to approach doesn’t have the same impact as grabbing them with a spooky ghost claw but it works just as well. You also get two Channel Divinity options. Conquering Presence will make everyone near you frightened, and Guided Strike will let you add +10 to an attack roll which will guarantee that you’ll hit in most if not all situations.

LEVEL 4 - PALADIN 4

4th level Paladins get an Ability Score Improvement: seeing as our Strength is uneven we can take a Feat like Heavy Armor Master, increasing our Strength by 1 and making it so that our foes’ puny non-magical weapons bounce off us like nothing.

You can also prepare another spell but we’re going to wait a bit on that.

LEVEL 5 - PALADIN 5

5th level Paladins get an Extra Attack, giving you enough attack speed to swing Nightfall twice before your opponent starts to run.

You also get access to second level spells. Oath of Conquest gives you Hold Person to keep your foes in place and Spiritual Weapon for a ghostly soldier to fight alongside you. You can also prepare a spell like Aid to further boost your health, making it even harder to slay you once more.

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 6 - CLERIC 1

Despite being a big metal man Mordekaiser is an AP champ, but he also hits people quite a lot with his mace. Hence we’re going into the AP class that also hits people with a mace. Now you may think that we’d want to go into Death Cleric for a revenant... THAT’S WHERE YOU’RE WRONG FOOLISH MORTAL! IRON STANDS ETERNAL! FORGE DOMAIN! At level 1 you get Blessing of the Forge allowing you to turn a weapon or piece of armor into a magical +1 weapon or armor. My tip? More armor. Iron stands eternal.

As a Cleric you also get Spellcasting that relies on your Wisdom instead of your Charisma. You also actually get cantrips! You are the master of death and you choose when people die, so take Spare the Dying to make them not die. To make sure your subjects hear your words Thaumaturgy will let all hear you. And just because Mordekaiser is a melee champ doesn’t mean you can’t have a ranged damage option, so take Toll the Dead so none can escape what comes for all.

Check page something-or-other to see how many spell slots you have, but what’s important to know is that you can prepare a number of spells equal to your Wisdom modifier plus your Cleric level. As a Forge Cleric you also get Identity to find the perfect weapon, and Searing Smite to seal your foes away with Nightfall’s Kiss. To keep usurpers away Protection from Good and Evil will make it nye-impossible for them to harm you, and to command your allies as an army Bless will strengthen their weapons and resolve. Other than that? I mean someone should probably have Detect Magic. Truthfully there isn’t much we need from first level spells.

LEVEL 7 - CLERIC 2

Second level Clerics get Channel Divinity options that use the same Channel Divinity charges that your Paladin Channel Divinity uses. Luckily these ones are a little more situational: Turn Undead lets you... turn undead. (Please just read the ability’s description as I’m sick of explaining it in every Cleric build I make.) Artisan's Blessing meanwhile lets you craft something from eternal iron... or whatever other metal you may have. The cost can’t exceed 100 gold, but you can arm your soldiers with weapons and armor... within reason.

You can also prepare another spell but we’re going to wait for...

LEVEL 8 - CLERIC 3

Third level Clerics can prepare second level spells. As a Forge Cleric you have Heat Metal innately prepared, as well as Magic Weapon. This is why I suggested you use your Blessings of the Forge on your armor, because Magic Weapon will let you improve Nightfall. And Heat Metal is surprisingly one of the best spells to counter you, so good thing you have it in your arsenal.

Speaking of arsenal: for the power to carry all that iron Enhance Ability will make you the perfect being for anything you may wish to do. Warding Bond is perhaps not as useful for you, but strengthening your allies strengthens you through relation.

LEVEL 9 - CLERIC 4

4th level means more Ability Score Improvements. Strength is tied to just about everything we do currently (and is notably needed if we want Platemail) so increase that by 2, making Nightfall all the deadlier.

You could also prepare another spell but there isn’t much to take from second level either, so it would be good to wait for third level spells. You do get another cantrip though and even the strongest warriors can use some otherworldly aid, so take Guidance for that aid.

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 10 - CLERIC 5

5th level Clerics can Destroy Undead of CR 1/2 with their Turn Undead Channel Divinity. Perhaps it’s odd for a revenant to destroy undead, but I’d rule it as culling the weak.

But more importantly you can prepare third level spells! Forge Clerics get Elemental Weapon for an upgrade to Magic Weapon, and Protection from Energy for an Adaptive Helm. May you rest in peace in Season 11. We’ve yet to get our passive yet, so to make Darkness Rise take Spirit Guardians to damage foes near you. And you know what we don’t have a lot of as an undead revenant? Undead minions. Animate Dead will bring forth your legion, so they can’t bring you down easily.

LEVEL 11 - CLERIC 6

6th level Clerics can use their Channel Divinity twice per Short or Long Rest, which is nice because this also affects your Paladin Channel Divinities. Additionally Forge Clerics get the Soul of the Forge for resistance to Fire damage and EVEN. MORE. AC!

And you can prepare more spells! Want to keep your domain safe? Glyph of Warding will deter anyone trying to stop you before you can awaken again.

LEVEL 12 - CLERIC 7

Level 7 in Cleric? Level 4 in spells. Forge Clerics get Fabricate to craft tools of war. But more importantly you can stop people from interrupting your 1v1s with a Wall of Fire! People can still butt in, but being surrounded by flames definitely makes it harder!

Additionally you can grab Death Ward, to stop anything from taking you down... at first. You may crack iron, but you can never break it.

LEVEL 13 - CLERIC 8

Level 8 gives another Ability Score Improvement which means it’s finally time to max out your Strength! This is great because you now also have Divine Strike to make Nightfall do an additional d8 of Fire damage on hit!

And how about more spells? Banishment is like your ultimate but you can’t join them in the Death Realm. And without you there isn’t much death. It’s honestly fairly harmless. But at least if they don’t belong in this realm you can hopefully lock them away for good.

Oh and your Turn Undead now can Destroy Undead of CR 1 or lower. So mind your minions.

(Artwork by Teddy Tarnando.)

LEVEL 14 - CLERIC 9

Who likes 5th level spells? As a Forge Cleric you know Animate Objects to bring unholy life to iron, and Creation to create said iron. For a burst of darkness that does Radiant damage Flame Strike is a good tool to level any battlefield.

LEVEL 15 - CLERIC 10

10th level Clerics may be blessed with Divine Intervention. You may pray to the god of death (or I guess the god of the forge too) for assistance before rolling on a percentile die. If you roll a number equal to or lower than your Cleric level, the gods intervene. If you receive aid you can’t use this ability for 7 days. If you aren’t heard the ability comes back on a Long Rest.

You know what else comes back after a Long Rest? Spell slots. You know what doesn’t come back after a Long Rest (normally)? The dead. So grab Raise Dead to bring the dead after a notably Long Rest. You can also add another cantrip to your list, and for times when iron doesn’t stand eternal you may want some Mending.

LEVEL 16 - CLERIC 11

11th level Clerics can prepare 6th level spells. Blade Barrier is perhaps not the most practical spell but it’s metal as fuck in more ways than one, blocking your foes with whirling death. Say it with me now: iron stands eternal! You can also now Destroy Undead of CR 2.

LEVEL 17 - CLERIC 12

At level 12 you get another Ability Score Improvement or a Feat... hey wouldn’t it be funny if we literally completely ignored our spellcasting modifiers in favor of just hitting things harder with our mace? This perhaps would’ve been stronger to take earlier but we’re finally grabbing Great Weapon Master for the hardest, most deadly strikes with Nightfall’s Kiss.

And more spells prepared? Well it’s perhaps not the most practical more undead minions from Create Undead will serve you well.

(Artwork by Sunny Pandita, Concept Artist at Riot Games.)

LEVEL 18 - CLERIC 13

13th level presents you with 7th level spells and damn there are a lot of good ones, but I’m actually going to suggest Regenerate to keep you or any allies in the fight.

LEVEL 19 - CLERIC 14

Another level, another spell. Even though there’s some really great stuff at 7th level you don’t have many spell slots there, so I’d instead suggest going back to fountain to resupply. Word of Recall (a 6th level spell) can help in a pinch to escape from danger and retreat to regroup.

Your Turn Undead now can Destroy Undead of CR 3 or lower. But most importantly: your Divine Strike now increases to 2d8 fire damage! So if Nightfall is a regular maul it’s doing 2d6 bludgeoning and an additional 2d8 fire damage on your first hit!

LEVEL 20 - CLERIC 15

15th level gives you an 8th level spell! You’ll only have one of these so make sure it counts! Clerics don’t have that many 8th level spells to choose from but you may be surprised to hear that I’m suggesting Holy Aura. Why? It’s the ultimate spell to stand eternally, making your foes attacks bounce off you like nothing while the weapons of your legion strike hard and strong!

FINAL BUILD

PROS

Flesh constrains; iron liberates - You know what’s fun? Having 20 AC with just (+1) Chainmail, and up to 22 AC with standard (+1) Plate! All I can say is that your DM will be thanking the gods that you didn’t decide to grab a shield.

Thus begins the slaughter - Ha ha Nightfall go bonk. If your sick of hearing people say that Martial classes don’t do a lot of damage show them a Martial character with Smites, Divine Strike, spells to boost their weapons, and Great Weapon Master to add a flat +10 to your damage! Not to mention that Guided Strike practically guarantees that you’ll land your blows, and you have two Channel Divinities per Short Rest!

I’m actually making a second paragraph for this: the most damage you can do in a turn (using two fourth level spell slots on Smites, a 7th level Elemental Weapon spell applied to your weapon, and assuming you use Great Weapon Master on both attacks) is... 4d6 + 36 Bludgeoning damage, 2d8 Fire damage, 6d4 Elemental Weapon damage (of your chosen damage type), and 10d8 Radiant Damage. This, on average, will do 130 damage! (Not accounting for Resistances.) To put this into perspective: Tiamat has 615 HP. A lot of resistances too yes, but not accounting for those resistances you in-theory are doing 20% of Tiamat’s health in one attack!

Power eternal - You may not have 9th level spells but you have 9th level slots, and tons of spells that will level the battlefield no matter how likely they are to hit. Buffing spells work regardless of your spellcasting modifier, and do so to great effect.

CONS

A fleeting delay of the inevitable - Hey you know what’s good to do as a spellcaster? Cast spells. Both your spellcasting modifiers are at the bare minimum required to multiclass. Perhaps see if you can build this character with Point Buy so you can dump every stat except for Strength, Wisdom, and Charisma. (Well Constitution is still good too.)

Such meaningless struggle - Dumping ability scores also means that your own saving throws are subpar, and unlike usual with Paladins you don’t have Aura of Protection to save you. Notably a -1 to DEX means you won’t be dodging any skillshots anytime soon.

Enter the crucible of anguish - You are a big, slow, bulky lad who needs to rely on a big smacc sticc to do just about everything. Anyone who can outrun you will quickly make you useless as you have to get closer to beat the shit out of people.

But you needn’t come to them: death shall befall them either way. They can stay away and hide from the inevitable, or approach and accept their fate. Nothing will break you, nothing will stop you. Twice slain, thrice reborn, you are Mordekaiser, and you stand eternal. Along with your kickass metal album.

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

[capricores]

astrology & tarot readings 💥

i’m super excited to announce i am finally going to be offering astrological readings again! i’m also going to be offering a few different tarot readings & mixed astro-tarot readings as well! below the cut is full information on readings offered, prices (all in $CAD), important notes, and so forth. thank you so much for your continued support on my blog and content, and i appreciate so much anyone who may consider and order a reading from me! i can’t wait to provide you guys with more insight to your astrological makeup, and hopefully give you a better overall understanding of how astrological placements function in general. i also hope to give you great insight via tarot and oracle as well.

NOTE: readings will close once i fill up a certain amount of slots (undecided rn, but likely stopping around fifteen-twenty), please check my bio or status in this post (see directly below) on whether or not readings are currently open before requesting! i will make sure to frequently update the status of readings, and will try to re-open them soon after they close. it is likely that when i start my new FT job in november that i may have to close readings for a bit or accept less reading slots :)

CURRENT STATUS: open for all readings

💥 RULES AND IMPORTANT NOTES TO READ FIRST:

must be 18 or over to receive a reading (apologies but i do not feel comfortable reading for minors/receiving their birth information)

i default my readings in the PLACIDUS or equal house system (i do this dependent on your place of birth; for more info feel free to DM). if you prefer/relate more to another system, let me know! i am happy to read your chart in another house system (if you’re new to astrology, i recommend looking at the different planetary house placements in your chart in whole sign system, placidus system and equal house system - see which you relate to most - the easiest to tell by is usually the venus & moon house placement, just search up some basic descriptions of the varying placement of moon/venus. i prefer equal and placidus; lately i lean more towards equal)

i use tropical/western astrology, with both modern and traditional rulers

my readings come in either written or audio format, it’s entirely up to you. both audio and written readings contain the same depth and amount of information. audio readings are supplemented by summarized/bullet points of topics covered but note they do not have written in-depth interpretations like the written natal chart reading would (but i do break down my audio readings with time stamps for easy navigation)

tarot readings and mixed tarot/astro readings can also be done via video if you’d like to see the cards as they come out/etc; please note tarot-only readings are not supplemented with writing/notes if you order them audio or video style

full natal chart + personal planet + progressions readings can be customized to an extent: for example, if you’re not interested in romance, let me know before i do your reading! i’ll focus more on friendships and business when touching on connections/partnerships/venus/etc. or, if for example, you’re more interested in romance, i can highlight those things when interpreting your planets and aspects! this goes for any topics/themes: career, finance, love, friendship, etc. just let me know your specific interests, or things you don’t like talking about (ie: you have zero interest in romance), so i can make your reading more tailored to your preferences. if you have any triggers (ie: do not want family talked about, do not want s*xual topics [sorry i have to add the * or i’ll get shadowbanned again lol😭] talked about, etcetc please let me know! it is never any problem to accommodate this)

obviously, no returns/refunds as this is not a physical item and it takes hours, sometimes days, for most readings to be completed! by ordering from me you are agreeing to this no refund or return policy.

💥 READING TYPES

✨ ASTROLOGY-ONLY READINGS

1. full natal chart reading (must have birth time) $50-70

tier one, $50:

interpretations of all planets (sign + house)

interpretations of ascendant, midheaven, descendant, ic (fourth house)

interpretations of any stelliums, “high energy” houses (maybe not a stellium- but a house with multiple planets/asteroids in it) and lack of an element/modality (or abundance/excess of)

tier two, $70, includes everything in tier 1, plus:

interpretations of every house, even if the house is empty

interpretations of strong / major aspects (main focus on squares & quincunx for lessons, blockages, secret strengths / areas of growth, etc - but any other strong/prevalent aspects will be covered)

interpretations of the following asteroids (sign/house/aspects): north/south nodes, chiron & juno

interpretations of interceptions and duplications if applicable

interpretation of yods and t-squares if applicable 

2. full natal chart reading (no birth time) $35

interpretation of all planets (sign)

interpretation of all major aspects (minus moon aspects)

information on any stelliums, lack of an element/modality (or abundance/excess of)

3. personal planets reading (birth time: $30, no birth time $20)

interpretations of sun through mars in the signs (and in the houses if you have birth time)

any standout aspects to the personals are interpreted (moon aspects not available if you don’t have birth time)

4. current astrological progress, focus, etc (”consultation”) $60

this reading is the one i’m most excited for! 🤍 this reading looks at your current transits as well as your progressed chart and solar return chart to determine where you currently are in your stage of astrological development and focus. we will discuss your progressed placements, kind of like a natal reading, and explain how they may be guiding, impacting and influencing you. we will also go over your current transits, their potential lessons, predictions based on your progressions & transits (long-term), and kind of get a full guide on what to expect, what to focus on, blockages, etc. 

this consultation is interactive! so i welcome you to ask any questions before or after the reading that you’re curious on (i ask for a maximum of five or so *intense* questions though - clarification questions and small questions are totally fine more frequently). you can ask things like “what will happen over the next year in my love life” or “what are the biggest lessons for me this year”, etc. this reading is meant specifically for gaining insight into upcoming events and themes in your life. i use your natal chart, transit chart, solar return & progressed chart. you NEED accurate birth time for this reading. you also need to be comfortable giving me both your birth place and where you will be (city-wise) on your next birthday (or last birthday, depending on which was closer; for the solar return chart).

please note however, this does not include any in-depth interpretation of your natal chart, if you’re interested in that you are going to want the first reading! it is also consultation style; i of course will interpret placements but it is more a “what to expect & focus on” type of reading, than a “this means (x)” type of reading. if you have more information of questions about this or any other reading, shoot me a DM anytime!

5. love reading $15

focuses on self-love, friendship & romantic love. this reading focuses on the planets, aspects, asteroids, houses that center around themes of love and connection in all forms (namely juno, venus, moon, 5th/7th/8th houses, etc). it will go over your wants in love versus needs, blockages in love and things to look out for, weaknesses versus strengths, the type of person that would likely best suit you as a friend or partner, etc. please note it’s recommended that you have your birth time for this reading, since it relies on house placements (however i am able to provide this reading w/o birth time).

i plan for this reading to likely be around three or so pages but knowing my rambling it may be longer lol.

6. blockages, development and growth reading $15

this astrological reading focuses heavily on the learning points and blockages present within your natal chart. specifically, this will have heavy focus on squares, oppositions, quincunxes, yods, interceptions, saturn placement, jupiter placement, sun placement 12th house + draconic chart. i will go over areas of struggle, blocks, and areas that likely need development and heavy focus based on your natal chart. i recommend the above progressed reading if you want a more extensive view on this with consideration to current transits and progressions. please note it’s recommended that you have your birth time for this reading, since it relies on house placements (however i am able to provide this reading w/o birth time).

i plan for this reading to likely be around three or so pages but knowing my rambling it may be longer lol.

7. work, education, career & purpose reading $15

this astrological reading focuses on your “purpose”. mainly highlighting placements like the north/south node, 3rd/9th houses, ascendant-midheaven, and sun/mars/mercury/uranus, we cover ideal careers, paths, and purposes for you. this will cover potential issues and blockages when it comes to work, career and study; as well as when achieving your purpose. it also points towards specific fields, industries, areas of study, etc that you are best suited for and guided towards astrologically. please note it’s recommended that you have your birth time for this reading, since it relies on house placements (however i am able to provide this reading w/o birth time).

i plan for this reading to likely be around three or so pages but knowing my rambling it may be longer lol.

✨ MIXED READINGS (astrology & tarot combined):

1. love life + your person/soulmate reading $25 w/ transits $20 w/o

tarot pulls to reveals the traits, potential signs, energy, etc of your person. using the natal chart (fifth house, seventh house, juno, venus/moon/jupiter, saturn aspects, and more) to determine the traits, likely signs/placements of your “soulmate” or ideal person.

tarot pulls surrounding current themes/blockages/etc in your love life, what you may need to hear, what your person may be going through, their feelings, etc. i also look to your astrological transits to see potential blockages or blessings in your love life right now.

2. monthly predictions / reading $15

using a mix of tarot & oracle pulls along with your current astrological transits, i’ll highlight the focuses, blockages, blessing, themes and similar for the next  month for you. things to look out for, look forward to, to specifically work on, etc. if you have a specific theme of more interest (ie: work life or love life), let me know and i can accommodate my reading to focus more on those than other things (just note i may end up pulling cards not related to said thing, because the universe has a stronger message for you).

✨ TAROT-ONLY READINGS (all pay by tip unless specified, but i do ask a min of a $2 tip!) - payment done via ko-fi or paypal. here are some reading examples (everything is customizable, these are just reading suggestions and possible questions, we can discuss further in DMs)

new moon, full moon, weekly or monthly readings: what you need to release, blockages this moon cycle/week/month, blessings this moon cycle/week/month, what to focus on this moon cycle/week/month

self-love & healing readings: what makes you wonderful / what should you be proud of you / what do you bring to others / where are you too hard on yourself / how can you show yourself love / areas of growth

general love reading: you / lover / dynamic, their wants / your differences / similarities / compatibility, your role in rs / their role / past of rs / current state of rs / future, etc.

general career and finance reading: where does your passion lie / what are you good at / how can you combine these / advice, current financial state / where to avoid spending and save / where to let money flow / advice, what are you doing wrong (career/finance) / what are you doing write / what should you do next / advice, etc.

friendship reading: you can actually use the love reading spreads/questions for friendships as well! some other examples; what you think you get from friendship / what you actually get / what the other person feels you bring / is this person a good friend, current state of the friendship / blockages in the friendship / blessings of this friendship / advice or oracle, etc.

stay or go reading (insp): current state of the connection or situation / why you should stay / why you should go / general advice [please note as with any other reading; you must make your own decisions; please do not ask me about toxic/abusive relationships; the answer is always to get help & leave if you can and are safe! this reading can be used for jobs, education, connections]

general three card pull style readings: you / the other person / the relationship, what you want / what they want / potential outcome, strength / weakness / advice, past / present / future, emotional compatibility / spiritual compatibility / physical compatibility, etc! but you’re welcome to google “three card tarot readings” and request a specific one

yes / no + reasoning readings: straightforward, ask a yes or no question and i’ll pull a tarot card + angel oracle card for the question + ask for clarification on the yes or no (please note “maybe” “not now” etc answers are possible, the cards won’t always give a solid clear yes or no)

extensive tarot love reading, singles $10: traits & signs/energy of your next person, how/when you’ll meet [or if you already have], future relationship strengths/weaknesses, romance + angel + moonology oracle messages, blockages for the relationship, advice, etc + one question answered of your choice

extensive tarot love reading, taken/talking stage/etc $10: your person’s current state, their current feelings, if they’re ready for a relationship (+ why/why not), if you’re ready for a relationship (+ why/why not), blockages holding the relationship back/that may arise, romance + angel + moonology oracle messages, strengths and weaknesses of the relationship, advice + one question answered of your choice

romance & angel oracle pulls for love: very straightforward oracle cards to give messages about your love life, partner, current situation, etc in lieu of using traditional tarot-only reading methods

please note i will not answer any medical, legal, or similar questions/advice. all decisions you make after any reading are always your own. astrology & tarot are meant to be for entertainment purposes solely. i am not held accountable for decisions you make after viewing your reading(s). please note i am not a replacement for therapy, counselling, financial advices, career counsellors, life coaches, or other professionals.

HOW TO RECEIVE A READING - for astrology, astrology-tarot mixed readings, and extensive tarot love readings)

please check bio/this post to see if readings are still open

fill out THIS form

i will then DM you once i receive the request to let you know if i am able to accept the reading or not (aka if slots haven’t filled up yet! i’ll try to give an estimated time frame of completion as well or at least let you know how many readings are before yours) - as of november, i will dm you only once i start your reading! but feel free to DM me first for confirmation

once i’m ready to start your reading, i’ll ask for your birth information and get things going

payment is done via paypal and again i use canadian dollars! once i confirm your reading, i take the payment AFTER i’ve already started the reading. i will send you an invoice via paypal, so all i require is your email. once completed, you’ll receive a google doc link to your full completed reading. i also attach a google form for review, feedback, etc. if you’re comfortable with me publicly posting your feedback onto my reviews page, you’ll be able to specify that in said form! the feedback is anonymous with the option to not be anonymous, entirely up to you.

HOW TO RECEIVE A READING - for tarot-only tip based readings

please check bio/this post to see if readings are still open

send me a DM mentioning you want to do a tip-based tarot reading

after that, i’ll ask you to let me know the theme, spread, topic, question, etc

i’ll pull your cards and do your reading, and then you can send the tip via ko-fi or paypal afterwards :)

[gunnerpalace]

It is Time to Kill The Common Understanding of the Dome of Las Noches Fight Once and for All

I’ve been thinking about @starrdustcrusader​‘s post making fun of BBS’s interpretation of Full Hollow Ichigo, and while it is very good and covers a lot, I felt that I had something further to add. Please go read that post first so you are on the same page.

I also invite you to go read chapter 350, The Lust 4, and the next few chapters as well.

Now, like I said, the post in question does a very good job of pointing out what’s happening here: Full Hollow Ichigo has less than zero concern for Uryuu or Orihime. He is not interested in protecting them whatsoever. Indeed, he directly attempts to kill Uryuu, with that attack being very likely to kill Orihime as well. It is only stopped by Ulquiorra’s intervention.

And why did Ichigo attack Uryuu? Because he was a threat.

When you are doing dispassionate threat analysis, whether that be tactical or strategic, when you are thinking with an essentially military mindset, motive stops really mattering, because it cannot be taken for granted. What matters is capability. What someone says their intentions are, or what their intentions seem to be, often matter less from this perspective than what they can do, or are doing.

What is Uryuu doing in this fight? He is interfering with Full Hollow Ichigo killing Ulquiorra. And that is Full Hollow Ichigo's only goal. Thus, Uryuu is an enemy and is also to be killed.

And so is Orihime (if “merely” as collateral damage).

It's that simple. This is again pointed out in the original post. In the same way that Ulquiorra earlier said to Ichigo that, "Killing you is synonymous with protecting Las Noches," killing Uryuu and Orihime at this point is synonymous with “protecting,” because they are in the way and are actively impeding the mission. (”Protecting” what? We’ll come back to that.)

I haven’t said anything new yet, now have I? So let’s get to that.

Here is Orihime demonstrating several flavors of hubris, and also completing failing to do anything to save Uryuu from his imminent demise. What do I mean? Well, let’s take apart her statements:

“Because I said that, Kurosaki-kun is trying to help me.” This is an assumption on her part, and it is wrong.

“I trained because I didn’t want to be a burden to him.” Mind you, she also says this in both the Xcution and TYBW arcs, and is a burden and fails in both as well (the infamous ”Why am I crying?” and “Her shield didn’t work” moments). This should have been a learning moment for her and it was not.

“I came here because I wanted to protect him.” There are other meta posts that detail the selfishness of Orihime’s actions in Hueco Mundo and in general. I would also like to point out that this was also her exact same logic in going to Soul Society. She didn’t learn anything from that experience either.

“So why? Why at the very end did I depend on him?” A great question. One that she never truthfully owns up to, given (2). But there was a reason Kisuke told her to stay out of the war. You may recall Rukia's statement to Orihime in chapter 228, Don't Look Back, that "In a battle, the ones who get in the way are not the ones that lack power, but the ones that lack resolve." She went on to say "Of all the battles in Soul Society, no one was a burden to anyone else. Not Ichigo, nor Sado, nor Ishida, and neither were you, Inoue. If any of you were less than who you are, I wouldn't be where I am today." This was very charitable of Rukia, because Orihime's contribution to her rescue was negligible and was, to reiterate, not why she was even there. Furthermore, Orihime didn't listen to her here either: she is once again demonstrating a lack of resolve, as she will continue to.

So Orihime doesn’t learn. Great. But maybe you’re thinking about (1). What do I mean she was wrong? I mean, doesn’t the manga confirm she’s right?

This is the crux of that argument. And this is also one of the cruxes of IchiHime as a whole. The thing is... it’s complete and utter bullshit.

This is the exact same scene in the original Japanese:

Now, I don’t speak or read Japanese very well at all. I’m still a novice at it. What I can do, however, is use optical character recognition and translation tools.

(よ)呼んでる - Yonderu - Calling

(よ)呼んでるんだ - Yonderunda - They’re calling

(き) 聞 こえる -  Kikoeru - I can hear

(た)立てよ - Tateyo - Stand up

(た)立 て - Tate - Stand

(おれ)俺が - Ore ga - I will

(おれ)俺が - Ore ga - I will

俺が護る - Ore ga mamoru - I will protect

(The parentheticals are furigana used as a pronunciation guide.)

Now do you see a single instance of “her” or “she” in this dialogue, particularly when it comes to the final line of “I will protect”? No, you don’t. Because it’s not there. It was never there until a biased translator inserted it into the dialogue. I’m not alone in this analysis, by the way.

Quite some time ago, @kodoku-no-maria​​ did a wonderful analysis about Ichigo’s instincts (”Mistranslations that Created the IH Fandom”) that also covered this (using anime quotes instead) and came to a similar conclusion. It’s a great post and you should read it. 

This isn’t the post she mentions in hers, but there is one done specifically of the manga by a deactivated account. You should read this post too. (This also notes other things, such as how Orihime says “Help, Kurosaki-kun!” and not “Help me, Kurosaki-kun!” so we can take it that the Mangastream / Mangareader English translation is just generally dodgy all around at this point. Which may well impact the points I made above about Orihime’s character; but I think given the events of the Xcution and TYBW arcs that it is evident she did not in fact learn anything, so I will stand by the basic thrust of them.)

Okay, so I’ve marshaled my evidence on the battle and provided corroborating analysis. (I have also reblogged all three of these posts because they’re good, although the links are to the original sources or as close to them as I could get.) 

Ichigo didn’t turn into Full Hollow Ichigo because of Orihime. She had nothing to really do with it. Great. So what?

Well, let’s now move on to my theory.

Now, you might be thinking that it is fairly obvious that all of those lines are Ichigo’s inner monologue. But I don’t think it’s so obvious. In fact, I would suggest to you that it is actually a dialogue.

On the second page, with the third panel, it suddenly zooms in to the wound in Ichigo’s torso. This notably later becomes Full Hollow Ichigo’s Hollow hole. You notice here the dialogue changes, from commands (e.g., “Stand”) to personal pronouns (e.g., “I”).

I would submit to you that the first three lines are Ichigo’s. But I don’t think the last five are. I think they belong to two other entities. Especially the last three. First, let me steal two of Maria’s highlighted panels to make a point:

So who is talking? It’s simple:

Do you really think it’s a coincidence that Zangetsu (Hollow Zangetsu) shows up wearing the exact same outfit as ‘Full Hollow Ichigo’ after Tensa Zangetsu gives a speech about how:

I don’t think so. Ichigo "fell into despair and halted [his] progress" and Zangetsu, as 'Full Hollow Ichigo' is "the "source of [his] despair." (This is the same despair that Rukia noticed when Ichigo came down from the top of the dome to confront Yammy.) As has been previously pointed out in the linked posts, we see this despair on the dome after Ulquiorra’s defeat in Ichigo’s attitude. Starrdust covered these, but let’s go over them again:

He’s doesn’t seem all that shocked or concerned here, to be honest.

He’s a lot more shocked at what he did to Uryuu.

But the thing that really gets him is that he’s gone and killed Ulquiorra. That’s his despair.

This is the first time he’s out and out killed somebody. (And yeah, Ulquiorra is dead because he had his bits vaporized with a cero, not purified.)

He finally has to learn this isn’t all fun and games, that you can’t turn everyone to your side and redeem them and be friends with them afterward, as he did with Ikkaku, Renji, Kenpachi, Byakuya, and even to an extent Dordoni and Grimmjow. This is exactly what Dordoni was warning him about. This is the lesson he will be forced to learn again after weakening Aizen long enough for Kisuke’s kidou to work on him.

And it is why later, his determination to “save everyone” in the Xcution arc by cutting Ginjou down and killing him (even if he turns into a Plus as revealed in TYBW, undermining the whole symbolic importance of the act) is a big deal for his character development, and one of the few redeeming aspects of that arc: it shows that Ichigo learned a lesson from this fight: sometimes to protect you have to kill.

And who taught him that lesson? Zangetsu.

Who was speaking in the 4th and 5th lines in that transformation sequence? My bet is “Zangetsu” (Quincy Zangetsu) or Tensa Zangetsu. And who was speaking in the 6th, 7th, and 8th lines? Zangetsu.

What was Zangetsu protecting? Ichigo. That’s his instinct. That’s all he cares about protecting, just like Tensa Zangetsu. He sure the fuck wasn’t protecting Orihime or Uryuu. And the mask of ‘Full Hollow Ichigo’ is there to protect those instincts. And the mindless rage of ‘Full Hollow Ichigo’ is Zangetsu’s rage at Ulquiorra for trying to kill Ichigo.

We of course know from much later, in TYBW, that zanpakutou spirits aren’t some separate entity from the wielder, but are the wielder (hence why we go from “The Blade and Me” to “The Blade IS Me”) which Ichigo will affirm in the reforging of his into the “two Zangetsus.” So this can ultimately be read as self-preservation instinct. These are the aspects of Ichigo that were willing to do what he himself consciously wouldn’t in order to stay alive.

(Also, Uryuu was an idiot and wrong to stop Zangetsu as Ulquiorra still clearly constituted a threat, so he frankly got what he deserved, if a bit harshly.)

In summary, not only did the fight above the dome in Las Noches not have anything to do with protecting Orihime, but it was entirely about Ichigo’s character development and relations with the personifications of his powers, and everyone has been reading it completely fucking wrong for years and years.

If you don’t know, now you know.

[ecampbellsoup]

Outlander Moments of Impact: I Have No Life, But You

To be attracted to someone is often merely the submission of the senses; and even more often than not, it’s outside of our control. We are drawn to whom we are drawn. There’s no formula.

To love someone is a choice. To choose to stay, to choose them over and over and over; to choose them when you hate them, when they’ve betrayed you. To wrap your life into their arms and decide on them regardless of what will follow.

Jamie and Claire Fraser’s love story is about as unconventional as it gets. 

Some might claim it’s over-the-top...that it lacks realism. And not simply because of the time travel involved, but because of the events surrounding their love; who could endure all of that suffering let alone love the person on the other side of survival? 

The Frasers have been through hell and high water this much is sure. Yet it is the tender moments when they confess their love that gives this relationship a truth that allows it to transcend from page, screen and directly into our hearts. 

A scene that exemplifies this in a pure, simple, yet lovely way is in 5x4 “The Company We Keep” when Jamie and Claire share their love, their doubts, their desires in the forest. And they choose each other again. 

Let’s break down this scene for some context, shall we?

The tension of the day melting away by the firelight, the Frasers finally have a moment of reprieve. Basking in a rare occurrence of fun, they dance. 

Taking her hand, Jamie spins Claire with adorable delight. They have lost so much; to watch them enjoy life is nothing short of wonderful. 

Claire beams, glows, is alight with love. Laughing with glee, unable to contain her joy, she watches Jamie dance for the first time. She just loves him loves him loves him. 

Drawing close to each other, arm in arm, the walk away together from the party escaping the crowd.

Sweetly, Claire confesses, “I didn’t know you could dance like that.” Even to this day, she continues to learn things about Jamie; she relishes discovering him. 

Unable to contain their unbridled happiness, they giggle the whole way. Teenagers once again, they savor every second in soft, warm affection. 

Taking her hand, Jamie twirls Claire again, before tucking her into himself. He wants her always close to him. 

They go further and further into the isolated woods. Bursting out in a chuckle Claire questions, “Where are you taking me?” Jamie chirps, “Away from prying eyes.” I want you alone. I want time with you, just you and me. 

Claire flirting, “Well, I should warn you: my husband’s as jealous as he is handsome.” 

Continuing to play, sneaking out from under his arm, Claire states, “And you should know, I can knock you off your feet, sir.” Seeing her wobbling, Jamie jokes, “You can’t even walk in a straight line.”

Humorously, Claire inquires, “Can you recite the alphabet backwards?” Throwing it right back, Jamie responds, “I expect so. English or Greek?” It is almost as if these two have just met and are exploring one another; their humor mingling with their desire. 

Conceding, “Oh, well, never mind. If you can recite either of those forwards, then you’re in better condition than I.” Claire captures Jamie’s waist, kissing him. 

Walking away from her, the mood shifts ever so slightly to something more serious at hand. Tentatively, “There’s a…a question I want to ask you.”

Eyes still twinkling from him, “What?”

Pausing for just a second, face shining, Jamie asks, “Do you want wee Bonnie? Do you want to keep her?”

Approaching Claire he continues, “We have a big house. And I’ve seen you wi’ her, Sassenach. I’ve seen how you would’ve looked with Bree. And I thought, maybe this might be the last chance for us to raise a bairn together.” Jamie’s face is full of emotion: loss from having missed out on Bree, desire for every experience with Claire, and hope for their future hand in hand. He wants to offer Claire the world. He would lay it at her feet that she would lack no good thing.

Silently listening until now, Claire knows she must inquire, “What would you think if she stayed?” She understands well what this conversation means to her husband, but she also knows that there is another couple who have suffered the loss of a child, and they have the opportunity to give them one. 

Not understanding yet, Jamie presses, “Here? In Brownsville?”

Taking Jamie’s hand, “It’s been suggested. Lucinda’s taken a liking to her And I think she needs our wee Bonnie more than anyone. She’d be in good hands.”

Practically, Jamie agrees, explaining it would be a blessing to the Brown’s estate. But then he adds, “I have no life, but you, Claire.” He sees she is his world. Everything he is, he desires, culminate in the woman standing before him. She is it. 

“But if you wanted another child, I thought that perhaps I might give ye one. One that you wouldn’t have to suffer carrying.” He seeks that she miss out on nothing with him. Yet he also wants her to bear no more pain than she already has.

Overwhelmed, Claire’s eyes fill with passion. She struggles, searching to even find the words. Who this man is to her. 

Claire leans into Jamie, affirming, “Please know, that if it’s at all possible, I love you even more for wanting to take the chance.”

“And I also regret that we were never parents together.” Claire is making sure Jamie knows that she feels exactly as he does. Despite being able to raise Bree, she missed him every second and felt his absence with every breath. 

Yet Claire is nothing if not honest, so she claims, “But, regret, isn’t reason enough.” Jamie’s face falls ever so slightly as he grasps the truth of Claire’s words. 

Sensing his masked disappointment, his grief, Claire professes with every fibre of her being, “l love our life.”

“I love our home together.”  Slowly, she is healing the wounds of his heart with the balm of her professed love, her choice of him regardless of the cost.  

“But, would we even be the best home for her? And then there’s our obituary.” Even in their desire, Claire practically recognizes their reality: danger follows them. 

Holding her hand, Jamie brings it to his lips and kisses it. All these gestures continually show Claire she’s not alone anymore in the world anymore. They aren’t alone. 

“I am grateful for every day we have.” You and I: we are enough. Every second we have is enough. You are more than enough for me, Jamie.

With that sparkle in his eye that only Claire can give, Jamie agrees, “As am I.” And they kiss.

Throwing her arms around him, squeezing him tight, tears flow down her cheeks. Claire holds fast to Jamie. She can embrace him and he is really there. 

And then, for a brief glorious moment, they linger in each other’s atmosphere. 

When Jamie and Claire made the decision for her to go back through the stones, and back in time and space, they did so for her child: Bree. Claire would have gladly died with Jamie that fateful day ...if not for their Bree. 

They made the sacrifice so that their flesh and blood could live and the legacy of their love would walk the earth. 

Despite the fact that she knew her life and the life of her child would be spared at Culloden, Claire also knew well that a piece her heart would perish with Jamie. Something that could never be replaced. Something that no amount of time exists to fix. 


When Jamie released the most precious and dear person on earth to him to sustain their lives, he did so prepared to die, prepare to not have to go on living without them. Yet, he survived. 

The chasm between Jamie and Claire was tangible to all around them, even if it remained unspoken. You can burn the clothing, you can force yourself to never utter their name, but you cannot erase their fingerprints on your heart. And they both had to choose to go on every day for twenty years silently calling through the skies for their lost one. 

But on this night in the woods, the same setting where their love sparked, the home they once lost has been restored. Their daughter is alive. She is well. She is with them. They are both alive. They are well. They are together. 

Confessing and claiming their love yet again they affirm: you are my home and you always will be. You are the lean-to that keeps out the rain. You are what gives me life. And that is enough. 

Despite it all, they would make the same choice again and again and again. 

“Then kiss me, Claire," he whispered, “And know that you are more to me than life, and I have no regret.” 

“I do know this: even now, after all the pain, and death, and heartbreak that followed, I still would make the same choice.”