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#medieval shenanigans
snake are beasts of the air, that’s a new one to me
“I’ll tell you what I did,” she said, “I had spent a long time raising in my castle one of the beasts they call serpents; he was more useful to me than you can imagine. Yesterday, that beast flew by chance to this mountain and found a lion cub that she carried to this rock. You ran after her with your sword and killed her, though she had done nothing to you. Tell me why you did this. Had I done something to you to warrant this killing? Was the lion yours or in your charge, so that you felt obliged to fight on its behalf? Are the beasts of the air so insignificant that you can kill them without cause?”
— The Quest for the Holy Grail, Chapter 29, E. Jane Burns translation
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astralights24 · 1 year
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i just watched ep 1. of game of thrones.
TWO BEHEADINGS, THREE SEX SCENES, INCEST, CHILD GETTING PUSHED OFF A ROOF.
what the hell is this show and why do i need to watch more????
(am i watching it for brienne of tarth? maybe.)
((i also watched the first ep with my mom because she’s obsessed with the show and was happy i wanted to watch it.))
(((why you needed to know that, i’m unsure, but it was pretty awkward.)))
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earthworms-worm · 11 months
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Hello! Please have an old drawing I did of these two little Medieval Rats (+birb). I'm in the process of redrawing them and completely forgot to post this lmao, next time you see them my style will have changed a bit (and I'm gonna improve their designs ofc).
Florian is a retired spy, Gylfi is his adopted feral child who's dream is to become a knight but alas due to her lineage and Florian's time as a spy, it will never come to fruition.
Flick is their pet falcon, he got the name because he's so fast that you can only see a flicker of colour when he flies.
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whatismoo · 2 years
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Chapters: 1/? Fandom: RWBY Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long Characters: Blake Belladonna, Yang Xiao Long, Weiss Schnee, Ruby Rose (RWBY), The rest of the gang will show up if/when I add more chapters, cameos by:, Pyrrha Nikos, Sun Wukong, Ilia Amitola, Kali Belladonna, Ghira Belladonna Additional Tags: Knights - Freeform, Swords, medieval shenanigans, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Bumbleby Week 2022, Past Blake Belladonna/Sun Wukong - Freeform, Past Blake Belladonna/Ilia Amitola, sword fights!, Sapphic Shenanigans!, banter!, Knight Errant!Yang, Princess!Blake, Courtier!Weiss, mild violence, of a tournamental sort -- but I'll tag if it gets more intense, Ruby isn't in the first chapter btw, but she's in the rest of the story Summary:
Come, friends, sit a while and listen. For I have a most important tale to tell, one which demands a keen tongue and a willing ear. A tale of bravery, truth, strength, honor and, most of all, Love. But I fear I must spurn you both, lovely Erato and mighty Calliope. Such a subject as this needs more than the common skill, to make legend ring with truth, and irreproachably! To come straight to the point: I speak of the most worthy knight in all of Remnant, the Golden Dragon of Patch. -L’Histoire de la Dragon d’or
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teamstandonit · 1 year
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anghraine · 7 months
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By popular demand (aka two people asked lol), a secondary Women's Wrongs Poll for characters I considered for the first one, but ended up not choosing for various reasons:
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ohmigoshiloveu · 7 months
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Wanna draw Grefgore doing something silly? Maybe seeing something he hasn't before
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Emizel put garlic in the spaghetti sauce as a prank, by the time it pays off it’s not even funny anymore
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archerinventive · 2 years
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I had the pleasure of hanging out with a few of the EMP (Empire of Medieval Pursuits) fight crew at Rad Con this year, and was fortunate enough to catch their demo.   
It's never a dull moment when the clash of armor is abound, and always a pleasure to watch some good sword shenanigan's . ^^ 
Thank you to the crew. http://empiremp.org/ With: Gordon Bailey
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Merlin, psst, lookey here, yes it's a banana. Here, hold it. Why? Because reasons darling, anyways—why's it big? It's just naturally that way babe, don't think too much about it, now slowly peel it, good, I need you to like seductively lick it...what?? Why did I word it that way? Well how else am I supposed to describe it? Give the banana head?? OUCH! I WAS JOKING...weeelll not really lol
Okay! Okay, joking, joking. I kid. Anyways I need you to do it for research purposes, yeah it's scientifically and artsy related, just kneel on this cushion and hold the banana firmly with both hands. Very good pose Merlin! Lookin like a pro, now swallow—oh! Hello sire—what? I was just using him for modeling, no there's nothing inappropriate going on... what's the banana for? It's for art. Yes. I know the banana is unnaturally huge sire—Merlin please don't talk with your mouth full—yes I know how that sounded like. I'm sure you're wishing the banana was you sire—
Ducks the gauntlet thrown my way
—BYE MERLIN LOVE YOU BESTIE AND GOOD LUCK! KING ARTHUR PLEASE GO EASY ON HIM!!
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spacefinch · 11 months
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I found this website where you can make medieval-style memes.
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Canonical Hours
in case you, like me, cannot for love or money remember the canonical hours and are also perpetually kind of pissed that “nones” is not “noon”, here are some helpful cartoon monks
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muses-of-teyvat · 25 days
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'what do you even use your nine years of Latin class for?'
clearly it's for understanding the names of Genshin constellations and making up new ones
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earthworms-worm · 1 year
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Hello hi I am alive! I'm sick and my drawing pen isn't working so I'm gonna try to either fix it somehow or get a new one, BUT in the meantime! Have some art I made back in July (I wasn't 100% happy with the art style, I was still experimenting with different styles but looking back on it it's kinda cute so I might go back to drawing with this style.)
Idk if the writing is clear but it's
Florian: Put your hood back on ffs.
(Bracket next to Gylfie): She saw the knights
Basically Gylfie always wanted to become a knight but she knows it'll never happen, so they just stick to watching the tournaments every summer.
Bellow is just some background information on them! These were just quick sketches I did, I have one more sketch of them I'll post later this week or next week!
These two are my medieval characters, Florian and Gylfie, and there is a running gag I have where I do not show the full face of Florian, only his moustache is ever seen. The reason for this is Florian used to be a world renowned spy for whichever country paid him enough to gather information on an opposing party.
His original identity before he became a spy is something only he knows. He's sixty years old (i know the drawing says different but I'm gonna make him an old man). The only remnant of his past self is his first name, Florian.
He was a spy for almost 3 decades, starting out when he reached the age of 13 and he carried on until he found Gylfie. Well, 'found' was more of a 'saved from a fire that was caused entirely by accident'.
Gylfie was around four years of age when the fire destroyed her home, and Florian had absolutely no qualms about retired the same day to look after her.
Florian would always look at Gylfie like the daughter he never had, and subsequently taught her all of the knowledge he had gained over his years as a spy.
But for all his worries and fears, Gylfie ended up wanting to become a knight. Unfortunately for her however, if anyone ever found out that she had connections to Florian, it would put her in grave danger.
So instead they travel around the continent, visiting cities and when the warmer seasons roll around they go to a city where Florian and Gylfie hid in the first few years after he adopted her.
They have a friend there, an eccentric shop keeper who has three crows as her companions and Gylfie swears up and down on her life that the crows can talk.
-I'm still fleshing out their world but I'll get there eventually, and the next post won't be as long I promise.
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jessicas-pi · 11 months
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i've done it, folks. after literal months of searching and trying different songs, i've finally figured out the perfect background music for my poorly-drawn storyboard-style animated trailer for my medival au
now all that's left is to actually draw the dang thing
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dykealloy · 2 years
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medieval 141 fic except there's three writers behind the wheel and not a single one of them owns a license (@martuzzio)
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Lord and Master
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Pairing:  Manwë x Fem. Reader (Elf |Third Person POV)
Themes: Medieval! Ainur | Angst | Dark
Warnings: Dark Manwë | Arranged marriage | Dub-con | Manipulation | Imbalance of power | Oral (male receiving) |Medieval sexism
Wordcount : 3.4K words
Summary: Manwë finally agrees to marry, but is angry because his ability to control his life is being stripped from him. Finally, on his wedding night, the chance to take back some of that control presents itself to him.
Rating: 🔥🔥 | Minors DNI | 18+
Rules and tag form here.
A/n: This is my first foray into dark/dub-con, so I apologize if there are any mess-ups in the story.
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The wedding passed like an ugly dream. Manwë did all that was required of him, biting the inside of his cheek the entire time.   
When word of his trysts with Námo made its way into the light, ladies refused him one by one. Varda was the first to rescind her offer of marriage. She had declared she did not think highly of a prince who threw the one he loved to the dirt and walked away like it all meant nothing to him. And where she went, the rest followed: Vána and Yavanna agreed with their lady’s choice, as did Arien and Ilmarë. Even the dutiful ones like Uinen, Lëa, and Melian refused the prince’s proposal with a courteous chorus of "Thank you kindly, your grace," followed by "But no." Nienna would never accept a proposal, and Meássë simply laughed in the messenger’s face when he showed her the king's letter. The king had purpled and raged for days when he heard.
Manwë turned to his bride, a wave of deep-seated anger and resentment surging through his veins. Lady y/n was not his choice for a wife. After Meássë refused, Eru finally had to stoop so low as to ask a minor lordling for his daughter’s hand in marriage. That stung as well. 
He glanced at his wife again. She was well-bred and well-mannered, so the others said. Y/n loved singing, sewing, and reading, but she was not what the crown prince wanted in a companion. She was too quiet and docile. She certainly was not Námo, yet he must wed her and secure the line of succession. That was his father’s order and the council's. 
"Wed her, bed her, and put a child in her," the king commanded once the offer of marriage had been accepted. "You are capable of this, yes?” 
Manwë had clenched his fists so hard they turned white at the knuckles. "You command I wed someone I do not desire," he spat, "Yet you heartily agree to your Lord Commander's wedding and bedding a lowly serving girl. How do you justify it, your grace?"
His father’s icy glare pinned him to the chair he sat in. It made Manwë feel so small. "Our Lord Commander is not my son. He will never wear the crown. And Eönwë commands the near-fanatical loyalty of our army. He even saved your life once. Do you not remember? How he fought your brother and bled in your name?" 
Manwë flinched when reminded. "Father...” 
"Keeping a warrior like our Lord Commander happy is in this realm's best interests." Eru interrupted him and picked up his quill and a piece of parchment. The sight made Manwë feel like he was in a ship already listing dangerously to one side. "And yours. That is how I justify it. But if you wish to refuse this marriage," Eru said while dipping the quill in new ink. "You need only say the word, and I will marry the lady instead.” 
And if I refuse, Valinor will learn my lord father has yet another son who flees his duty, the prince thought bitterly. Oh yes, I can hear it now. Poor king Eru, plagued with selfish, disobedient sons who care for nothing but themselves. 
Manwë did not want others to see him as no better than Melkor, but he wished for the days when his brother was heir and life was a carefree dream, where he was master of his destiny and lived how he pleased. Now, with every word and every stroke of his father's quill, he felt his sense of control being stripped from him, sliver by painful sliver. Each day he felt a little smaller and a little weaker. He started to feel more like a boy desperate for approval and nothing like the man he wanted to be.  
Forever bowing my head to the will of someone else. Father, the council, the crown. Is that what I am? Someone who readily acquiesces? Someone helpless and weak?  
Someone coughed. It was the priest. The time had come to exchange vows. The bride and groom turned to face each other, one with eyes full of hope and the other wishing to see nothing before them. 
"One heart," they repeated in unison, "One soul, One flesh. Bound in word, body, and spirit, from this day until the end of all days." 
Y/n looked at her new husband through her veil, thinking how comely he looked in his rich black velvet doublet, and his silver hair falling down to his shoulders in beautiful waves. She hoped to find blushing cheeks, bright eyes, and a shy smile. All she found was darkness in his deep blue eyes and anger in his clenched jaws. It was a warning, a sign of dark things that may come to pass. There was great danger here, but she shrugged the growing sense of foreboding away and still gave him her hand, shivering when he slipped a thin gold band onto her finger. There was nothing else she could do. The contract had been signed, and the vows had been said. For good or ill, she was his now, and her duty as a wife was to obey her husband. That was what she was taught. 
"With this ring," Manwë declared to all present, his words clearly forced. "I pledge my love!" 
His bride did the same. Y/n’s words were sweeter, and filled with tender hope. Her lord father came forward and lifted her veil. Manwë ground his teeth and did his duty, leaning in and kissing her chastely before swiftly pulling away. He accepted the necklace his father presented him in a beautifully carved box and draped it around his bride's throat. Y/n was overcome with the shivers. Her new jewels felt like a noose. She took deep breaths to compose herself and clung to the hope that the prince was as kind and courteous as the songs said he was and that love would bloom between them over time.  
"What the Gods have brought together," came the priest's cry, "let no one tear asunder!" 
The crowd clapped and cheered in approval when the crown prince and princess turned to face them. Manwë dutifully offered his arm, but y/n felt his stiffness as they walked down the aisle together. The chapel was aglow with the light of a thousand candles. A riot of color bled from the stained glass windows onto the floor. Those standing in the upper walkways threw rose petals onto the couple while they walked beneath them. Swirls of red and white rained down on y/n and Manwë even as the doors to the outside world opened. Crowds gathered outside Taniquetil’s great chapel cheered even louder than those inside. Y/n raised her arm and waved to them, thinking her heart would burst with joy. She turned to face her husband, her joy soon wilting like a flower under the scorching heat of the sun. When Manwë turned to her, his eyes filled with something akin to hate. 
“Come, wife," he said stiffly. "It is time we took ourselves to the feast." 
An hour later, they were walking into the great hall for the feast. Y/n tried to talk with her husband during the carriage ride to Ilmarin to engage his attention. Manwë would look at her with little interest before turning away. His cool indifference stung, but y/n chose to be patient. She thought he was grieving the loss of his first love. This will pass soon enough, she thought. Someday she would be rewarded. She was certain of it. 
The feast was a splendid affair. Eru had spared no expense. Minstrels strolled between tables, singing and fluting and strumming lyres. Fire dancers walked on stilts, juggling flaming batons in their hands. Guests dined on thick mushroom soup and salads of beans, onions, spinach, and beets. There was roasted boar and roasted quail and squab, and pears soaked in red wine. There were flagons of mead and flagons of ale, glass pitchers of iced summer wine, and the finest hippocras money could buy. Many broke into loud applause when servants walked into the hall carrying a great swan pie between them. The dish was reserved only for royalty. On this day, it would be served to everyone. Seated at the high table on an ornate chair under a richly embroidered canopy, y/n had little appetite for her food, fine as it all was. Her stomach would tie itself into unpleasant knots whenever she glanced at her husband.  
Manwë's mood had darkened even more. Irmo of House Blackgrave was seated with the other high lords and ladies, but Námo was nowhere to be seen. He had been ill since Manwë sent him away. A common illness, so the messenger said, one that would go away under the tender care of his sister. The prince knew differently. Námo was sick because of him.  
It should be me tending to him, and not Nienna.  
He could not tend to Námo now. The chance to do so disappeared when Manwë put his name on parchment and agreed to take y/n for a wife. With each stroke and flourish of the quill, he felt his sense of control slip away even more, making him feel helpless and angry. 
Weak. Helpless. Forever bowing to the will of others. This cannot continue. 
He heard gentle laughter. It was the Lord Commander's wife. She was wide-eyed while she watched a troupe of tumblers perform incredibly daring feats. Her doting husband kept her in his lap, not caring a whit for what other people thought. Eönwë was content to feed her morsels from his own plate before stealing unexpected kisses, his arm tightening around her waist in a protective gesture when she leaned in and cupped his face. He would listen indulgently whenever she said something, beaming like a man who knew his love was well returned. The sight filled Manwë with despair. He wished to hold Námo the same way, feed him the same way, and drown in his laughter. He turned to face his wife. She was playing with her food. Anger seared through his veins again.  
"Does the meal not please you?" he asked in rough, clipped tones.  
Y/n was startled. It was the first time the prince had asked anything of her since their first meeting half a year ago. 
"It is excellent, your highness," she replied meekly. "But I fear my appetite cannot do it justice."   
Your highness. The way she said it, all soft and submissive. Manwë gave her a measured look.  
Small. Meek. And bound by oath to obey me. The thoughts came swiftly and unbidden. Manwë ignored such thoughts and looked away just as a herald called the guests to dance. His wife placed her hand over his.  
"Shall we dance, your highness?" she asked hopefully. 
Manwë’s mouth twisting into an ugly sneer was all the answer y/n needed. He did not want to dance, eat, or join in the merrymaking. He wanted this night over and done with. 
There is only one thing left to do, he decided, and rose. The music slowly died when he stood to his full height. Everyone's attention turned to him. 
"I confess, my lords and ladies, as much as I would love to dance," he declared with a forced smile, "I have more... pressing matters to tend to with my lady wife. Come, my lady. It is time we did our duty." 
The others laughed. Y/n forced herself to smile. When her husband offered his arm, she rose and took it, turning a deaf ear to the ribald jests shouted their way. She let Manwë lead her through lofty halls and cool corridors, all while her stomach was a roil.  
She had been prepared for her bedding, but the way Manwë looked at her, his eyes ablaze with cold fury, frightened her. She looked straight ahead, clinging to the hope that her fears were unfounded and the prince would surprise her with tender words and gentle embraces. 
That was not to be. When the couple entered an airy bedchamber and the doors closed behind them, Manwë pulled away from her. He walked over to a side table and helped himself to a cup of wine.
Manwë studied her critically. Quiet. Dutiful. Perhaps this can work.
"You must now obey me in all things, yes?"
“I am your wife, your highness. I must obey."
Small. Meek. Bound by oath to obey me. This time, he did not push the thought away. Y/n was bound by oath to obey him. Whatever he asked of her, she had to do it without protest. The knowledge of it was too much for him to resist. 
It is time I regained some control over my life. I will not bow my head to yet another. 
"Undress yourself," Manwë commanded. He walked to the bed, his new boots clicking over the stone floor.  
Y/n blushed furiously. She dreamed of her husband undressing her, giggling while he fumbled with the clasps and lacings in her dress. She did not expect him to order her to undress herself in front of him. 
"Undress yourself," Manwë urged, his words like honey. "Come now. You are a true and obedient wife, yes?" 
Y/n wrung her hands. "I... I wish to be, your highness." 
Manwë lifted his cup and drank deeply, draining it to the last drop. "Then prove to me you are a true and obedient wife. Undress." 
Y/n flushed. She was his wife. She pledged herself to him. Swore to obey him in all things. And obey him she did. She first undid her braids, removing the pins and clips, her fingers fumbling at her hair like they were all broken thumbs. Manwë was content to watch. Seeing her hair fall free in loose strands did something to him. Watching her comply with his command did something to him. Whatever it was, he soon grew drunk on it.  
"You are still dressed, my lady," he observed. "Your gown… it is beautiful to be sure, but it is too much. Unburden yourself. But leave the necklace; I like it."  
Y/n flushed again. This time in humiliation. "Your highness, I... should I be doing this?" 
"Yes, sweet wife," Manwë replied, enjoying himself thoroughly. "It is only proper that you do so." 
His wife managed somehow, her cheeks aflame the entire time. Her heavy gown and sash slowly slipped off her shoulders and pooled around her feet. Her stays and slip followed. When she finally stepped out of the wisps that passed for smallclothes, Manwë put his cup on the ground and stood up, surprised to find himself already hard. 
There were gooseprickles all over y/n's exposed skin. Her eyes were fixed on the floor. Manwë circled her once, then twice, like a predator circling his prey. He let his hand glide up her spine and play with her hair. She shivered when he palmed the soft expanse of her breasts. Manwë felt her tremble. He liked it. It made him feel powerful, for the first time in many moons.  
"Undress me," Manwë ordered, slipping out of his boots.  
Y/n kept her eyes on the clasps on his tunic. She fumbled again, her fingers turning back into broken thumbs. Manwë smirked and kept still.  
Her hands were soft and warm when they brushed against his flesh. She was unsure of herself and hesitant, but she did her work dutifully and quickly. Once freed of his doublet and undershirt, Manwë returned to the bed and stood by the edge. 
"Come, wife," he said, holding out his hand. "Come here." 
His wife took one hesitant step after another, uncertain of what he wanted. Y/n had not been taught much concerning matters of the flesh. Her mother had told her to expect certain things, like discomfort and pain, but she also said such things would go away and the rest would be nothing but magic. Y/n studied her husband. There was hunger in his eyes, and flashes of something far more sinister. She feared there would be no magic this night. Not for her at any rate. 
"Closer," Manwë cooed. "Closer. Good. Now. On your knees." 
Y/n looked at him, shocked. "Your highness... I... I do not understand."  
Manwë grinned wolfishly. "Get on your knees and undo my belt. Go on. You would do it if you really wanted to be a dutiful wife, yes?" 
Y/n licked her lips. Of course, she wanted to be a dutiful wife. From the first moment she saw Manwë all she had ever wanted was to be a good wife and earn his love. She nodded and sank to her knees, grateful for the rug beneath her. She undid the clasp of his belt, then the drawstrings on his breeches. Her cheeks heated when Manwë tugged them down just enough to free his cock. 
"Open your mouth," he said, and caressed her cheek. He ran his thumb across her lips, imagining what they would look like, swollen and glistening with the remnants of his spend. "Go on."  
Y/n looked up at him, thinking she had heard wrong. Manwë caressed her cheek again, almost in affection. "Open your mouth. You do not want to disappoint me, do you?" 
"No," she sputtered. It was a strange feeling, having his cock slip past her parted lips and sink further and further into her mouth. She felt him, thick and salty and heavy on her tongue. Y/n glanced up at him, surprised to find his eyes closed and his head thrown back. 
"Loosen your jaw," he hissed, and wrapped his hands around her hair, pulling it out of the way. "There. Like that."
Manwë's mind soon grew hazy with bliss. Gods, her mouth feels so good. His grunts grew louder and louder. There was nothing else—no whispered endearments—that would soothe his wife and inflame her passions. Manwë did not care. He simply wanted to regain some control. And it felt so good, to take back what control he had over his life. 
I am in control.
Y/n did not know what else to do. She let him thrust into her mouth, her eyes stinging with confused tears. Manwë wiped the tear away with his thumb and brought it to his lips, as if to taste. He shivered when he tasted the saltiness of her tear on the tip of his tongue, and shivered when he felt the warmth of her mouth and the softness of her sinful lips. He wanted to kiss those lips while he claimed her maidenhead, but not now. He was so close that he could already feel a tightness in his belly. He brushed his hands over her hair and groaned when her lips tightened around his cock. Just a little longer. He needed to hold on for a little longer. And that was all he had. The world went still. Manwë let out a deep moan while his body splintered and shook with ecstasy. Y/n could do nothing but grip his thighs while the warmth of his spend filled her mouth.
Manwë panted and drew back, satisfied for now. "Swallow," he insisted, not moving another inch until y/n had swallowed every last drop. He stood back and admired the sight of his wife on her knees before him, her lips glistening and swollen just like he hoped they would be. That sense of feeling powerful returned, this time stronger than before. 
I am in control.
Manwë grabbed that feeling with eager hands, not wanting to let go of it. 
I am lord and master.
He finally walked away, setting himself to rights and picking up the rest of his clothes as he did so. "I will sleep in here," he said, opening the door to a smaller bedroom. "Good night." 
Y/n rose and turned to face her own bed. Her knees were sore, and her jaws hurt. She thought there would be more to this night. "But your highness, this is our wedding night. Should we be…" 
"Do not fret," Manwë yawned contentedly. An hour or two of rest was needed, and then he would consummate their marriage. "I will claim your maidenhead and consummate this marriage. But it will be at a time of my choosing. Not yours. Never yours. Am I understood?" 
Y/n opened her mouth in reply. She thought she deserved to have some say on how this night went. Manwë leaned against the door, his arms crossed, and his eyes darkening again. It frightened her, made her whisper, "Yes." 
"Yes, what?" 
"Yes, your highness." 
"Good," Manwë muttered. "Never forget what I am, wife. Your lord and master, nothing less than that." 
Y/n tried to blink back her tears when he slammed the door behind him. Her hopes slowly crumbled like brittle clay. There would be no love. No tenderness. Not with him, not after tonight. Manwë made it plain with his few words that she should not expect more from him. Suddenly more tired than ever, she crawled into bed and slipped beneath a soft pelt, waiting for him to come for her again. 
The thought made her blood run cold.
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tags: @cilil​ 
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