#mental health care is a fucking joke
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#it’s so funny to me that for 6 months before my mental breakdown#I reached out to countless psychiatrists and therapists to get help#and was rejected and ghosted and cancelled on more times than I can count#which is what lead to my mental breakdown and partial hospitalization#so we paid the place $59000 dollars for a month of care#to help me and it did help. it was a life changing experience#and they helped send me resources for outpatient shit for when I left#but I’m now running into the same issue :)#where every doctor I try and book with? cancels on me#and the clinic we paid 59000 dollars to help me ? cant do a damn thing to get me in anywhere to refill my meds for me#because I’m not ‘actively being seen by them’#and they refuse tele health appointments#everything is working against me right now#mental health care is a fucking joke#like sure reject the bitch with bpd and see how well that goes over#I’ve had so many meltdowns over this already this week I’m losing my mind#anyway. Whatever. I’m figuring it out#I’m taking a fucking nap
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"Finally a day off"
My Day off:
Adulting is overrated 😭
#relatable content#relatability#real life#positive mental attitude#mental health#self love#self care#work life#work life balance#late stage capitalism#anti capitalism#fuck capitalism#neoliberal capitalism#capitalism#meme#funny memes#funny stuff#funny shit#funny animals#too funny#funny post#funny#daily memes#lol memes#tumblr memes#best memes#memes#funny jokes#jokes#spongebob
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It's weird how people paint "daddy issues" and even "mommy issues" as, like, a joke or a failure on part of the person who has those issues, rather than recognizing that daddy and mommy issues stem, for so many people, from abuse. What this all is is just abuse apologia, and nobody seems to either notice or maybe even care.
When somebody with daddy or mommy issues opens up about the "why," I can't ever seem to shake the fact that they tend to have gone through a ton of abuse and bullshit as a child. It's just crazy that other people would look at that and see a joke or a failure of the once-child who was abused.
#abuse#abuse tw#abuse mention tw#child abuse#child abuse tw#mental health#it really goes to show (to me) that people either can't or don't WANT to acknowledge that parents can be the ones to have fucked up#if all the blame is placed on their child/ren then you can maintain the illusion that the parent is always right...#...that parents know what is best and they will always do what is best for their child/ren#it's just weird to be somebody with parental issues and all that gets steamrolled into 'mommy issues' that then become a Big Joke...#...especially because i'm a man (and because people are misogynists who think it's just so funny that women are people)...#...i find that my own issues are expected to be treated as a joke or a punchline or something i must whisper in the dark...#...so that others may have the luxury of pretending to not hear it or to have the luxury of forgetting in the morning...#...and it just sucks because that leaves me to remember and grieve and doing that with the knowledge that my abuse Is A Joke at My Expense#if you wonder why so many abuse victims/survivors become unsavoury: this is why#i'm too bitter about this topic specifically to care about the comfort of people who don't get it and don't WANT TO...#...because it is THEY who are uncomfortable with the very NOTION that abuse happens#if you can't acknowledge that abuse happens WITHOUT downplaying to for your sense of comfort you will NEVER help abuse victims/survivors#you will find that you start prioritizing YOUR sense of comfort over the safety and continued survival of victims/survivors
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They really just hate doctors, huh
#archivist.mp3#you cant protect them you cant ensure their mental health#you make them work long hours and then complain about their fees#you mistreat them#you fuck up medical exams and treat it like a joke#and then you ask why no one wants to stay here#fucking *hate* this#I'd apologize for this but i don't *care* I'm beyond pissed rn#desi tag
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So I got a survey in the mail from Veteran's Affairs today asking me how the Transition Assistance Program (TAP)* could possibly be improved. I had to brace myself against the kitchen counter and full-belly cackle a solid 30 seconds after reading that, because oh? My god? I medically retired at the HEIGHT of the pandemic. WHAT ASSISTANCE. NO REALLY. THEY DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER GETTING MY LAST DENTAL WORK HANDLED, WHICH IS A LITERAL REQUIREMENT FOR RETIRING. They fucking handwaved SO MUCH of the requirements just to get me out faster!
God. TAP is a goddamn joke. I've been in survival mode every minute of every day since retiring 3 years ago, and the best I've gotten out of the VA is a surprise upgrade to 100% disability pay and a few voicemails suggesting I should get a pap smear. Fuck off.
*TAP is for transitioning out of the military, not for transing your gender. It is still very weird to me, somebody who signed up a solid 2 years before DADT was repealed, to get pro-LGBT+ e-mails from the VA. Very cool! But very weird.
#my mental health is in SHAMBLES and not once have i gotten an e-mail about that#like yeah it's better than when i was in sure#but when i was in the only argument i had against killing myself was that i didn't trust my supervisor to take care of my cats#that is 100% not a joke#i'm alive in 2024 because i love my cats#no e-mails about mental health but BOY do they love slapping the suicide hotline on every fucking thing#fuck off#i'd trust the neighbors i've never shared two words with over the VA's suicide hotline to help me in a crisis
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hmmm unfollowing and blocking lots of people
#this is raw in the tags so if you're easily triggered by mental health stuff don't read it!!!!!!!!!#last night i reblogged one of those asylum posts before i was like wait that's fucked up and i deleted it and i feel really bad#like i've been to a mental health hospital a few times i know what it's like in there and how dehumanizing it can feel#i remember everything that happened. and the things i saw and the people i met there. the time i was threatened with sedation.#watching you take your meds and ensuring you swallow them because you can't be trusted#the hard beds and them opening your door every 15 minutes to make sure you aren't hurting yourself#taking my clothes off in front of people multiple times to prove i didn't have drugs and that my self harm scars had already been there#and i'm seeing lots more and other mental health/lobotomy/asylum 'memes' and jokes and it's.... it's really not okay guys#you have to think about how this might make someone else feel who has been through this shit#it's reality and it's not a meme#please be more careful#jen talking to herself#ttpd
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still can’t believe they won’t let you have stuffed animals in mental hospitals
#Like you’d think they’d let an emotionally distressed suicidal child have a comfort object but NOPE#According to my mom it’s because they’re worried you’ll hide drugs or razors or some shit.#How would I even open up my fucking plushie if I don’t have any sharp objects???#Getting drugged was also not fun#Seriously mental health care is fucked up in the US#I only spent ten days in a psych ward and I got ptsd from it#Not even joking#Yet another time when Spencer vents about their mental hospital stay#Seriously if I have to repeat it again because a certain someone harasses me I will just cry#I’m honestly too afraid to ever get a vaccine or shots or anything because I’m afraid it will trigger me#Fucked up 0/10 would no t recommend
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damn today was A Lot™
#my heads pounding again and my eyes hurt cuz i did A Lot Of Crying™#a member of staff who commonly deals with pupils struggling with mental health#told me to “get tougher skin” when some boys reminded me of my bullies last year#quite frankly miss i dont fucking care whether they were joking or not <3#anyhow!! on good notes i got in-ear ear defenders so i dont have to wear chunky headphones#and i did some cooking last lesson helping my friend make a stir fry for dt!!!
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life shouldnt be this fucking hard
#it breaks my heart to see my mom struggle so much :(#my mom had a rough childhood#and then was stuck with an abusive husband and alone raising 3 kids#she never got any help from anyone#and she struggled so long to finish high school#she's struggled with her mental health a lot too#she has never gotten any help from anyone#and the health care system is a motherfucking joke#the state and government and the entirety of society is a motherfucking joke#and now when she found a program she wants to take that can help her get the job she wants#her application for a student loan was denied#so she cant take that program#and im worried bc she is losing hope more and more everyday#i dont want her depressed :(((( im so worried#and im a deadbeat loser so i cant help her with money at all#i just want to see my mom living a comfortable life and not be depressed i wanna cry#i hate hate hate this world so much i HATE society#i HATE people because people allow this world#ppl LIKE capitalism otherwise we wouldnt have this world#ppl mostly vote for the right. who make everything worse#i fucking hate humans so much there is so much unneccesary suffering#and it is only getting worse and worse#like in the uk normal middle class ppl are becoming homeless in droves bc they cant afford the rent#and in greece ppl are commiting suicide en masse bc its the same there with the economy#and im like WHY dont ppl wake the fuck up#and organize the french revolution.2 worldwide??? why do we accept this? why dont we fight?#im going crazy i just wanna blow ppl up like what the fuck is wrong with society
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and we're back with another thrilling episode (lol) of our favourite show: everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hates me everyone hate
#want me to keep going or?????#i stg i can't do fucking anything without literally everyone and their mother getting pissed at me can i#i need to *remembers i'm not allowed to say kill myself* kill myself#jokes but apparently not. i don't get to make jokes u see#time to delete every social media account again and go offline for six years i think#lol i could do that right now and literally i won't even say no one would care they would care bx theyd throw a fuxking party 🎊#whatever i'm spiraling who needs good mental health who cares who cares who fucking cares who cares
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venting so much i ran out of tags lmao
#i think im hallucinating ?????#i have my headphones on (listening to boyfeel on repeat n choppin up some paper)#and keep feeling / seeing shadows in my peripheral vision#im probably just dehydrated and having bad floaters but i dont like it :)#today has also been bad dramatically awful#life isn't serious there's no reason to feel this heavy#oop very emo thoughts incoming#life can't be meaningful or ill miss my parents too much but can't be meaningless or im living without them for nothing#im just. struggling very hard this year. idk#i had so much health bullshit going on for months that i put off going to a psych n now im so busy that it feels bad taking time off for it#and im also scared of getting on meds bc the idea of being dependent on something that i might not have access to is.. auuughhh#idk dude my adhd has been debilitating lately and i feel so stuck and sometimes i think i have ocd bc my compulsions are so fucking bad and#all my mental bullshit with my breathing has slowly been driving me wild and peaks my anxiety#and sometimes i worry abt being bipolar bc my mom's mom is and my mom's best friend told me she thought my mom might have been#bc the way my moods are so low or so high is exhausting it feels like i haven't had a “normal” day in so long#but also atp when im happy i feel manic bc idk how to healthily experience happiness anymore#idfk y'all !!!! im also very nonverbal these days#ugh and still going back n forth on telling my therapist ive been suicidal again bc i dont want him to have to report me or anything idk#a few months ago i made a joke about offing myself and he got rly serious n said he'd have to take action if im serious so im leaning no#like. i wouldnt actually kill myself. i just don't want to exist sometimes in this life#its just been very very very very very very very very very very very very very very hard lately without my parents or grandma#and even after all these years it's still heartwrenching to think about continuing to live this life without them#like. i just want to make them laugh. i just want to feel their arms around me in a warm hug. i just want to dance to their favorite songs.#i don't want to think of them and see their dead bodies anymore. i want to remember them healthy and smiling.#i would take care of them again in every lifetime but fuck dude. i just want to remember their good days instead of the end. can i please#please fucking invision them at their best. i want to remember the dad that played baseball and video games and whose laugh filled the room#i want to remember my grandma who was so sassy but kind. whose button nose crinkled when she smiled. who taught me to happily be dramatic#i don't want to remember them being frail. i want to forget the frustration i saw in their eyes. i want to forget seeing them struggle#(insert sadness about not remembering my mom at all)#just. fuck dude. my life is simple and i am safe so i shouldn't complain. but things feel so fucking hard sometimes. i feel so heartbroken
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#i figured it would be nice if usamericans could not make posts about how jk rowlings transphobia is an online white person thing#because okay look i dont expect people in your country to know about it#but over here she is using her wealth and status to actively harm trans people#trans people in the uk are suffering due to her#she is a fucking threat to us#to our lives#to our existence#maybe not everyone in the uk knows about it but that doesnt fucking matter#what matters is the fact that joanne rowling is one of the wealthiest people in the country and is held in high regard and has actual sway#in politics and has been using all of that to actively harm us#and im sorry but you can fuck off with your ''bestie its not that deep''#it is that deep#our priminister felt comfortable making a transphobic joke in the house of commons when the mother of a recently murdered trans child was#spectating and despite being given multiple chances to apologise he didnt#i regularly have to avoid the news as a trans person in this country because its so fucking depressing that i worry for my mental health#im not gonna start arguing with whoever made that post because i just dont have the energy#but jesus fucking christ#maybe for you it is a chronically online white queer thing#because YOU DONT LIVE HERE#YOU DONT LIVE IN THIS COUNTRY#so idk maybe dont fucking tell us to calm down about it#maybe recognise that a post isn't about you and just scroll past#dont invalidate the genuine threat that woman poses to us#i dont care how jk rowling is seen in your country to be honest because it really doesnt matter at this fucking point#not every thing is about your fucking country#vent post#delete later
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There is no meme. I have just realised i am the joke.
#mentally tired#mental health#mentally fucked#joke#they don’t take me seriously#i am the problem#i am stupid#i am the joke#sorry for this random ass post#they won’t care after i die#they don’t care about me#i am replacable#they only talk to me because they pity me#i am pitied
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"you'll need a doctors note" or what. or WHAT. you're gonna fire me. when i'm clearly a valuable worker and youre hemorrhaging employees constantly and you won't even pay me fairly to train new employees. sure. fire me. i'm sure burger king would be happy to have me
#or any of the places that pay above 15 an hour!#not joking when i said i'm in a fire me i dare you mindset#i had a 101 degree fever 2 days ago i'm not going into damn work#and i have medical ptsd so i will not be needlessly triggering myself for a fucking doctors note i do care more abt my mental health than t#this shitty minimum wage job!!! get fucked!!!#sorry for getting sick the weekend of st patricks day!!!!! EVERYONE WHO WORKS THERE KNOWS I DONT FUCKING DRNK. I'M NOT HUNGOVER#she speaks#work tag
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As a trans person I just want to say- if you (cis, trans, anyone reading this) have EVER referred to transition as suicide prevention.....let me just say, you sure as fuck had better not support people who think suicide in the name of 'protest' for Palestine is activism!!!!!!
#tw suicide#seriously i'm really angry#and i know not many people are doing this but suicide doesn;t have to happen often for it to be signficant and important!!!#I'm not talking to the people taking their own lives but the ones praising it as glorious protest#seriously if you do that you are no ally to ANYONE with mental health problems#this is why ALL activism must include care for the individuals within to avoid burnout and obsession#these destroy lives- i am not joking#there are literally people in the online pro-Palestine movement (usually people with no personal connection to the conflict)#who are decrying anyone talking about mental health right now because Gaza is more important#what the fuck is happening???????????#i will say it again- opposing war is supposed to be about life! and living!!#you seriously think Palestinians in grave danger in Gaza want you to die in their names from your war-free country????
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If you use men's mental health only as a counter argument in a gender disparity debate then you don't give a shit about men's mental health
#do you call your male friends to check in on them? do you tell them to rest when they need to? do you tell them#not to call themselves stupid because it's hurting their self image in the long run?#do you pick up your friends on a bridge at 1am because they were having suicidal ideations?#do you cut fruit for them and listen to their concerns about whats going on in their life? do you make it safe for them to express#their feelings without bigoted judgement?#do you give constructive advice but also let them vent about their irrational fears without making a joke out of it?#do you try to remind them that being violent towards themselves and others is only going to make things worse?#do you walk your drunk male friend home because its dangerous to let an inebriated person walk home alone?#do you pay attention to how many substances your male friend has been taking in an overly short period of time and try to help detox?#do you take your friend on simple hangouts just to unwind and show care about their projects and interests??#because if you dont then you dont fucking care about men's mental health.#i do this for All of my friends of all genders. care about everyones fucking mental health. all the time. not as an argument but#because you love your peers#you cunts#misc#im pissed
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