Tumgik
#might have shed a tear or two while making this
gyudons · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
despicable
updates as of 22 oct
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Travis Dermott knew that he would draw attention with his actions in the Coyotes’ home opener against the Anaheim Ducks at Mullett Arena on Saturday. The Arizona defenseman just hoped that the spotlight might shine on the issue that he was addressing, not on him.
“You don’t really want to go against rules that are put in place by your employer, but there’s some people who took some positive things from it,” Dermott said. “That’s kind of what I’m looking to impact.
“You want to have everyone feel included and that’s something that I have felt passionate about for a long time in my career. It’s not like I just just jumped on this train. It’s something that I’ve felt has been lacking in the hockey community for a while. I feel like we need supporters of a movement like this; to have everyone feel included and really to beat home the idea that hockey is for everyone.”
“I won’t lie,” said Dermott, who is playing on a one-year, two-way contract. “From the outside, it’s easy to see that I’m putting my career on the line for something. I definitely went through some emotional ups and downs that night, not regretting anything by any means, but I’d love to have maybe done a couple of steps a little different by making sure that everyone was aware of what was going on before I did it.
“I don’t want to put my teammates or my coaches or my GMs or the equipment managers in any kind of bad light when it’s their job to kind of look out for something like this happening. It was definitely something that I did just by myself and was prepared to kind of deal with whatever repercussions the league decides to push towards that. I’m not going to back off and say that this battle is won, but we’re going to find better ways to do it.”
As Dermott noted, LGBTQ+ inclusion is an issue that he has supported for a long time. Without getting into specifics, Dermott said the issue is personal for him because it impacts people close to him.
“I’d be lying if I said I haven’t shed tears about this on multiple occasions,” he said. “So yeah, it’s something I’m definitely very passionate about.
“I’ve met a lot of people that from the outside, it looks like they have everything going right in their life and they have a smile on their face every time they talk to you. But sometimes when we get closer to people and get comfortable enough for them to open up to you, you can see that there’s some pretty dark stuff happening to some good people. It doesn’t take too many times encountering something like that for it to really change someone.
“I’ve been blessed to have some of those opportunities put in front of me to really change my view of what being a good person means; what being a good father and a good example and role model means going forward. You really see how people are hurting and it’s because of a system that maybe no one’s intentionally trying to be malicious about, but until you’ve really had that first-person experience seeing people hurting from it right in front of you, it’s tough to kind of take steps.”
It would be a surprise if the league handed down any sort of punishment. The optics alone would add to the public relations damage that the original ban created. Even so, Dermott reiterated his desire to bring the entire franchise into the fold before he takes similar actions in the future, but he also made it clear that he will not be silenced on the topic.
“It’s not like I’m shutting up and going away,” he said. “I know more questions are going to be coming. We’re just going to be as prepared as we can be to just spread love. That’s the thing. It’s gay pride that we’re talking about, but it could be men’s health. It could be any war. It’s just wanting world peace. Everyone’s got to love each other a little bit more.
“Like my parents said growing up, ‘How awesome would it be to be the guy that people look up to?’ That’s what really hit home when I was a kid, especially from my mom. You want to grow up and be that guy. You want to be the guy that’s having the impact on kids like NHL players had on you. If they had been racist or bigoted, that’s going to have an effect on you.
“With how many eyes are on us, especially with the young kids coming up in the new generation, you want to put as much positive love into their brain as you can. You want them to see that it’s not just being taught or coming from maybe their parents at home. They need to see it in the public eye for it to really make an effect.”
34K notes · View notes
gutsby · 2 months
Text
Benign
Tumblr media
Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Reader
Summary: Marrying a former Soviet sleeper agent was your first mistake. Letting curiosity get the better of you and saying his trigger words before sex was your second.
Warnings: 18+. DUBCON - Bucky is partly brainwashed; R is reluctant at first. Reliving past trauma (i.e., grief, prior HYDRA captivity). Rough, unprotected p-in-v.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Tumblr media
Marrying into the mob meant one of two things: turning a blind eye to your husband’s crimes or taking them up as your own. Most of the women who had gone before you chose the former, leading lives of willful ignorance while their spouses cut deals, shed blood, stole guns, and submitted only to the laws of secrecy and discretion.
You, unlike those wives, hadn’t had the luxury of choice.
Your life, unlike theirs, had been sold to a man you didn’t know, by a father you couldn’t stand, and now your dad was dead, and this man—your husband—was to blame.
The least Bucky could do was fuck you hard to say sorry.
But no, ever since the Winter Soldier had reared its ugly head that dreadful night in Madripoor two weeks prior, your husband hadn’t laid one finger on your body that was not soft, sweet, and sickeningly apologetic to you. He seemed almost scared to initiate sex, and when he did, couldn’t help but act like a touch might break you.
After all, one almost had. Those hands he’d hear you beg and plead to put on you now were the very same ones he’d used to kill dozens, if not hundreds, including blood of your own blood. To the world, Bucky’s reputation commanded fear. To his wife, now, he felt duly obliged to prove he was more—that you were safe with him, not from him. He’d carted you off to every GP, hematologist, nutritionist, and grief specialist lauded among Brooklyn’s elite to make that happen. Fast. Frankly, these days, the thought of fucking was the furthest thing from his mind.
Unbeknownst to Bucky, somewhere along the spectrum of grief, you’d already come to settle comfortably at the ‘Need-to-be-fucked-until-I-can-no-longer-think-or-feel’ phase, and every bone in your body was crying out for respite in the form of ruthless, mind-numbing sex. It didn’t make sense. You hardly knew what to do with it. You should have lashed out, shut down, cried rivers and lakes of tears for that integral part of family that had been lost, but for whatever reason, you had to go numb.
You wanted to do something really, really fucking dumb.
Remorseful as he was, Bucky and his explanations for who or what the Winter Soldier was had been sparse. He’d told you that he had once been held in captivity by HYDRA, had his brain re-wired some way to make him a merciless Soviet sleeper agent, and that the night in Madripoor was the first in ages he had been ‘activated.’ How did activation happen? Of course, he wouldn’t tell.
But Steve would.
Steve had told you everything you wanted to know about your soldat, describing in painstaking detail how he worked, trained, operated, and could be called to action. You were almost certain Rogers had said it all as a way to assure you that it wasn’t Bucky who’d killed your father—it was someone inside him. You were more than positive Steve had never intended for you to use his intel like this.
You hadn’t believed him. Couldn’t believe him. How the fuck could someone sever all ties to their conscious mind and just transform anew into a killer? You got to be hell-bent on knowing for certain whether it’d been Bucky or him, it, whatever the hell the Winter Solider was, and on knowing it now. If your husband was faking it all and simply using this persona to justify the killing, that would be it. Trust gone, marriage over. If he wasn’t, well…you hadn’t gotten that far into your own line of thinking.
“Tell me what you want, doll,” Bucky said, pulling you back to the present.
He shifted gently against you, cotton trousers raising the friction a little as he slotted between your legs. He was still dressed head-to-toe from his meeting that morning.
“I want you to fuck me. Make me cum. Please.”
You were bare, save for one small scrap of linen and lace that somehow passed as a nightie. Your gaze was soft.
Bucky didn’t want to say no, but he also felt too guilty to say yes. The way you were watching him now, eyes so helpless and pleading, body writhing for contact, he knew you didn’t want his touch so much as needed it. Desperately. Couldn’t bear to be burdened with grief so you brushed it aside, to the furthest recesses of your mind until all that was left was desire. Starvation, really.
He could satiate you for now, but that hunger might not ever leave. The corners of his lips twitched into a frown.
“Gentle?” he mumbled.
“Rough,” you countered.
“Baby—”
“I really don’t need another fucking lecture on death, Bucky. I know I’m not myself right now, but I can still make these decisions, okay? Don’t talk to me like I can’t.”
Anger flashed in your eyes for a second, then indignation, then nothing. Without much energy left, you pushed him away. Flopped back on the bed and, seeming to sink into yourself, heaved a low, feeble sigh.
“I know. Hey,” Bucky leaned over to press a touch to your tummy, and it made you want to hurl, “I’m sorry.”
You turned onto your side.
“You still don’t remember what happened?”
The question came suddenly, almost from somewhere outside your body, it seemed. For the hundredth time.
“No,” Bucky answered, for what felt like the thousandth.
“This Winter Soldier—”
“He isn’t me.”
“You didn’t know?”
“Couldn’t know. Wasn’t…programmed for it.”
Bucky was watching you now, eyes as contrite as they’d ever been while you rehashed this subject to the brink of tears. He never could stay composed when he saw you cry.
“Baby…” he started, arms reaching out for you.
Eyes still filling with tears, you shook your head and swatted him off. You sat up, and your brows pinched together in a look he couldn’t read. Contemplating.
At last, you made up your mind.
You would try something new—and really, really stupid:
“Zhelaniye.”
“What?”
Bucky’s own expression contorted with uncertainty.
“—semnadtsat, rzhaviy, rasvet—”
He heard that. He immediately wished he hadn’t.
“Wait—”
You were curious. You had no idea what you were doing.
“Baby, baby, stop—”
“—pech, devyat—”
You were speaking so fast, surely it wouldn’t work like that. Either way, he had to stop you. He seized your arms, giving a sharp, deliberate shake, pupils blown to the size of saucers in his eyes. There wasn’t much time.
“Don’t—”
“—adin—”
No time at all.
“—dothisdon’tfuckingdothishoneyplease.”
Losing himself already. Feeling it stir inside his mind.
“—dobroserdechniy—”
‘Kind-hearted.’ ‘Benign’. You truly had no clue what these words were liable to do, much less what they meant.
Having enunciated this last part, you swallowed. Took the tip of your tongue and rolled it left-to-right across the backs of your teeth, waiting for your speech to take effect like some magical performance before your eyes.
It hadn’t, it seemed. You blinked. He blinked. You sat in a protracted silence for what seemed like seventeen years, and presently, your stomach began to churn. Nothing happened—you’d been right about this fuckery all along.
Then you remembered one last word of the sequence.
Faintly, you said:
“Soldat.”
The man above you straightened. Sitting. Stiff. Still perched by your legs at a comfortable distance but regarding you now with a pointed stare. Expectancy made manifest in a simple, sharp glare from his eyes to yours.
“...Bucky?”
The look on his face grew even harder. For a time, he persisted in that strange and silent grimace, and just when you started to suspect he was faking this whole demeanor of deadened stoicism, you heard a voice. Clawing out of his throat but sounding nothing like him:
“Who the hell is Bucky?”
The words drove a fear to the greatest depths of your bones, and you hardly knew why. You stared back at the handsome, barren man still watching you with severity, and you couldn’t seem to find your husband anywhere.
“James?” You weren’t sure why you tried his name again. You just didn’t know what else to say.
The scowl seeped into his mouth, and he frowned.
“James,” he repeated, like the word was foreign to him.
You found yourself shuffling back on the bed just then—to what, you didn’t know. You just felt a gnawing need to put some space between you and this person, this glowering face, however you could. When he grabbed your ankle, you let out a startled sound, and when he followed you up on the bed, you did more than just whimper; you lifted your leg to knee him directly in the stomach. He caught it.
Then he stared again, expression bloodless and wan.
“You’re scaring me, Bucky.” Your voice trembled as you tried to free your leg from his fist—grip unusually strong.
The man paused another moment, if only to soak in your words and let his gaze trail over your face. Your exertions did not register. And, for the very first time, you felt as though you were something more like a plaything in your husband’s eyes—not a full-fledged human being but a system to be gamed. The feeling was so unsettling that you had to turn away.
Or try to, anyway.
Craning your neck just far enough to spy your phone on the nightstand, your first thought was Steve; he would know what to do. But before you could even think to twist and lift your body in that direction, you felt a hand yank you to the bed, flat on your back. You looked up at Bucky and found yourself caged between two arms. He lowered himself to his elbows, shifted his weight to one side, and seemed not to notice your movements at all when you tried to slide away. The man just splayed his hand across your stomach and pressed it firmly. Stay.
You weren’t one to shy away from a challenge—or keep hope alive against the odds. You put your hand over his.
“James—”
“Zhena.”
The abruptness of Bucky’s word stole the rest of yours. You cocked a brow and followed his gaze to your hand.
To the gaps between your fingers, then the touch that fanned across them to settle on one digit in particular.
Bucky thumbed at the diamond and smiled. He smiled.
“Zhena,” he repeated.
You blinked.
“I— you...gave me that, Bucky. You did.”
He hummed in acknowledgment.
Bucky stared at the ring for what could’ve been five seconds or several years, and then he did something unexpected. He shifted his touch to the bodice of your dress—again, if you could even call it that—and he began to tug at the satin bow situated between your breasts.
Of course, this nightie being designed for honeymoons and supremely easy access, it didn’t take much effort at all for the folds of your dress to come apart. Your breasts spilled out of the fabric without so much as a hint of protest, your torso was quick to become fully exposed, and suddenly, shortly, your hands were fumbling at your chest in an effort to regain some smidgen of modesty. Your husband just shook his head, following your hands.
“Moya zhena,” he said, a touch more emphasis and fervor to the first of the two words.
Now it was you who was shaking your head. Trying to pry his touch away as you slid up the bed. When he followed, you saw the icy expression had been supplanted by intrigue and, though you still felt ill at ease, you couldn’t deny you were curious to know what he was thinking. Who was thinking it? Soft, plush lips swiftly replaced his hands, and before you even knew what he was doing, Bucky, or someone, was latching onto your left breast. Using teeth to graze the hardened nub and send a ripple of thick, guilty pleasure coursing through you.
You whimpered. Bucky groaned.
Your fingers slotted through his hair with every intention of pushing him away, but when you tried, he just flicked his tongue and made another delicious sound against you.
You pushed with even more force, and he groaned again.
Not Bucky, not Bucky, not him, you have to—
“Stop!” you cried.
A set of soft, warm baby blues darted up to meet you.
Some flicker of recognition seemed to cross them, too.
“Honey?”
You almost lurched toward the sound. It was Bucky.
Suddenly, your hands were making fists in the collar of his crisp white button-up, and you were trying to yank him up. You murmured his name in disbelief, relief, and gathered him up in your arms to pull him in for a kiss.
The lips that met you were soft for a moment—just one.
Then the teeth reappeared. Harsh, jarring, biting. You jerked back at the sensation, and when you found his face again, it seemed your husband was lost to you all over. The eyes were attentive still—nowhere near as cold and aloof as they had been before—but they did not radiate the same warmth and admiration that Bucky’s always did. You almost couldn’t believe what you were seeing. He was gone, just like that, and there was nothing you could do to stop it from happening.
A broad palm cupped your cheek to bring you in for another kiss, and you weren’t sure if you should indulge. It didn’t seem you had much choice anyway, because the lips that were seeking yours were hungry. Starved. Searing into your mouth with a force you couldn’t refuse.
But something inside you wanted to find Bucky again.
Somewhere inside this stranger was lying dormant a trace of your husband; you’d seen it yourself, if only for a second. It made you curious. Where had he gone? What did he do when forced to retreat into this strange, preprogrammed being, and how could you get him back?
“Bucky,” you mumbled, more of a plea than a moan.
You were kissed harder than you had been in a long time. You didn’t have to think, or do, or breathe one puff of air that this man didn’t account for. His tongue wedged a gaping space in your wet, welcoming mouth for him to fill, and somehow, you didn’t feel the urge to protest. A familiarity in the way he kissed almost put you at ease, and when his body lifted slightly, yours lifted with it.
Before long, Bucky was sitting. Kneeling between your legs with an eye to your soft, shaking torso. You’d barely even come to notice just how hard you were breathing until you felt a palm on your stomach again. There was an oddly calming insinuation in that one simple touch.
And again, he smiled. Brighter than before.
“Nashe?” He sounded eager as he said it.
You peered up at him and raised an eyebrow in question. Perhaps you should’ve felt more exposed; after all, you were sitting half-naked with your husband’s assassin alter ego stroking your stomach and beaming over you, eyeing you expectantly, and you didn’t know what to say. Apart from the short set of words Steve had taught you, you were totally clueless to Russian, and you weren’t quite sure you were in a place to ask Bucky to translate.
When it seemed words might never come, the gleaming teeth above you were shrouded in a tighter, close-lipped smile, and Bucky nodded. Appearing to understand. Instead of forcing a response from you, he just let his hand migrate down your belly, fingers tracing the skin, then settle comfortably—momentarily—at the crest of your pubic bone. Then he pressed the heel of his palm into the place residing right below it, and without really meaning to, you moaned. A quiet maelstrom of pleasure circled low in your abdomen, threatening to draw noises from your throat you weren’t planning to make with every gentle gyration of Bucky’s lower hand.
You had to purse your lips to contain the sounds.
Again, he nodded.
“It’s okay,” he said, so quiet he almost couldn’t be heard.
He let the friction continue for a while like that: just palming you, watching you react to the simplest of motions against your swollen, aching clit and try not to writhe. At length, you squirmed a little bit. Bucky seemed to want to wait for something to happen, and when you bucked your hips, a look in his eye said that was enough.
He lowered himself between your legs. Shoulders bumping your thighs as he spread them apart, chest rising and falling in measured breaths, and lips smiling all the while. You sucked in a breath when his face came to rest just a few inches shy of your bare, aching warmth.
“Bucky?”
The man looked up at you and blinked.
“Yeah, honey?”
One thumb traced over the seam of your cunt, and your back nearly arched off the bed. There he was, again, gaze safe and secure to yours and hands moving in tandem as they always would. His tongue calmly followed suit. When you fisted his hair, he blinked once more and then directed his attention back to your wet, warm, velvety folds with a pointed look and a purpose.
The sound that escaped you next could hardly be classed as anything less than a scream, but the soft and unperturbed demeanor of the man between your legs showed he hadn’t noticed at all. He just sucked diligently—damn near dutifully—on your clit with a vigor you’d never felt, and when you yanked at his hair, he hummed.
It was like his lips had been trained for perfect suction; that was how well and thoroughly he descended upon your swollen little bud. An airtight kiss and a quick flick of his tongue, paired with his hot and heavy breaths fanning over your cunt, sent your senses into overdrive. Your toes curled inward, your throat let loose a gasp, and without fully realizing it, your walls were clamping down, pulsing and leaking out desire for more of this touch.
Then, without warning, Bucky brought a hand to the throbbing and slick cunt that was presently clenching around nothing, and he fed it two fingers. So forceful and deep he nearly buried his knuckles right along with them. Then he started scissoring those two fingers, sharply.
“Open, milaya,” he said. Again, it wasn’t entirely Bucky.
But you felt a faint remembrance there. You didn’t want him to stop. Maybe you were led astray by the gentle laps of his tongue or the prodding of his fingertips, or perhaps there was something stubbornly familiar about the way he was touching you now. You couldn’t tell.
All you knew was that both of your hands were holding tight to his head and begging him, wordlessly, for more.
Your moans rang all the way through the bedroom in your new, far-too-big penthouse apartment in Brooklyn, down the hall, reverberating through every inch of the space until all that could be heard were your sounds and his and the delectable little noises of your bodies working together. Bucky hadn’t even stirred to pleasure himself.
You wanted that part to change.
With your hip pinned to the mattress and Bucky’s tongue laving over your clit in ruthlessly quick movements, you probably would’ve liked to cum all over his mouth and fingers, but you wanted to see him pleased even more.
Just when he’d worked a third finger inside you and was driving you close to your peak, you pushed him away.
Bucky parted from your folds with a glistening chin and two furrowed eyebrows, clearly frustrated to have been torn from his mission before you reached completion, but you wouldn’t let that look linger for long. You used your leverage in his hair—however slight, comparatively, that grip might have been—to pull him up on the bed.
Bucky surprised you with just how swiftly he moved.
His steel-blue gaze was on yours in a second, equally penetrating and soft.
“What’s the matter?” he asked.
“Nothing—”
“My baby okay?”
He surprised you again; this time by how quick his demeanor was to shift the second he sensed something was wrong. Just like Bucky. It had to be him in there.
You nodded, still out of breath from the wonders he’d been working with his tongue. You squeezed his arm and tried to coax him toward you, to help him lower his body some, and when he seemed uncertain, you offered a smile. It’s okay to touch, you won’t break anything.
Bucky eyed you skeptically, but it was clear he was more wary of himself than of you. He glanced over your body, briefly to his, then slowly, apprehensively, sank down.
“Just fine,” you mumbled, hooking your legs around his back the second his chest was close enough to yours.
You felt an uptick in his heartbeat when your heels dug a little more firmly into the waistband of his pants. While your hands started working their way toward the front of that fabric, wedging clumsily between your bodies, his gaze flitted to yours, and his brows drew even tighter together. He didn’t try to stop you, but he certainly seemed confused as to why you wanted to include him so soon. Why you cared to show concern for him at all.
You noticed that then, and in just about every moment preceding, the man was taken aback by kindness.
Whether it was pulling him closer to you, tugging his pants down with a tender touch, running your fingers across the bulge in his boxers, or simply nodding your head and letting him know it was okay to touch you back, Bucky seemed unaccustomed to any care in this area.
When your fingers made it around his cock and started stroking him, gently, he just might’ve come apart.
His chest shuddered with the inhale of a short, strained breath, and his eyelids fluttered, as if meaning to close.
Bucky’s jaw clenched, and he started to shake his head.
“No, let me—”
“Let me,” you finished for him, wrist flicking back and forth quietly. You paused just to rub a quick touch between your folds, collect some arousal, then return to touching him when he met your eyes again and allowed you to continue. You skimmed his sensitive underside with your palm and let the warmth of him bleed into your fingertips as you worked him up to a comfortable pace.
Bucky rutted into your touch, probably harder than he meant to. Then he planted a hand beside your head and anchored his weight above you so that he was close enough to reach your lips—but he didn’t kiss you.
His expression hardened again, and he forcibly removed himself from the pulse of your fingers. He frowned.
“You want me to fuck you, no? Make you cum?”
He sounded irritated again.
Briefly, you recalled your words from earlier and nodded. It was true, you’d said it to him like that, and you’d meant it. You just couldn’t make sense of what he wanted now.
It seemed Bucky couldn’t wait to indulge you any longer. He fisted his cock in one hand, angled the head just outside of your cunt, and burst in with one thrust.
“Then let me,” he muttered, plunging down to the hilt.
The first go was rough, and the second was no kinder. Bucky’s face screwed up with indifference again, like he wanted to get something out of his brain and just do.
Like there was a task at hand that needed to be finished.
You couldn’t deny it felt fine at first. Fucking edifying after all those horrific thoughts had been eating away at your mind and rousing your own hunger for numbness. The drive of Bucky’s thick girth in and out, in and out repeatedly was no doubt capable of rendering you dumb. But being slammed into and taken so roughly was only good for you when you knew he was feeling good too.
This Bucky was back to being entirely flinty and lifeless—practically devoid of all emotion as he railed into you.
The back of your head was forced into the pillow with the weight of each thrust and Bucky’s thumb pushing into your chin—‘Better, milaya? Is this better for you?’—and frankly, you wanted to push him back and ask the same.
But you couldn’t. The pace he’d set was suffocating, and the stretch of his cock inside you was unusually tough.
Instead, you sank your nails into his arm and mumbled:
“Bucky.”
The man’s thrusts were both stabbing and rhythmic, sending a welt of pleasure blossoming up in your chest. You tried again:
“Bucky.”
He blinked.
And slowed.
“Bucky,” he mumbled back.
Seemingly mindless and mechanical, he snaked a hand behind your head to lift your face and tilt it toward the sight below: his cock splitting you open before him, parting your insides with an easy, welcome glide through the slick of your folds. You watched as your arousal enveloped him fully. Not a single inch of his rock-hard, throbbing shaft was spared; even his balls were soaked. They felt even heavier slapping your ass with each thrust.
“You remember?” you asked, hating how small you sounded.
The man’s nostrils flared, but he gave a curt nod. Expression taut and vigilant, as though anticipating something going wrong at any second. Still, he nodded.
“Years,” he answered.
“Years?”
Since he’d done this? Felt good? Become this way?
No, Bucky was activated in Madripoor just weeks ago. He didn’t look like he was ready to indulge in any ‘feel-good’ pleasure, and you weren’t sure when he’d last been with anyone else before you. Years could mean anything.
You chanced a few soft fingertips up to his cheeks, cupping either side of his clean-shaven face in an effort to anchor you both to one place. The pit of your stomach was reeling with warmth, and friction, and fullness. It took everything in you just to pull him in for a quick, grounding kiss before the feeling gave way to even more.
Bucky’s teeth nicked your bottom lip. He flinched back.
You ignored the sting and repeated his name, murmuring it carefully up to the seal of his mouth as if requesting entry with that word alone.
It seemed to work. Bucky kissed you back with a gentle, albeit guarded, sort of tenderness that made him soften. His thrusts weren’t as rough and punishing as they were before. The dull, throbbing ache between your legs transformed into something sweeter, and your body no longer had to brace itself against strokes that, to you, were nearly bruising and, to Bucky, were just necessary.
For once, your husband let out a soft grunt of pleasure.
“They never let us,” Bucky said as his teeth grit together, “It’s been years.”
“Since what?”
The face above you tempered more—this time with a trace of sadness behind it. He continued to rut into you, but now his thrusts were sloppy, and it seemed as though he were battling against his own pleasure with every motion. He lowered one hand between your legs and began to thumb at your clit, gaze torn from yours.
“Close now?” he muttered.
Ignoring the question you’d asked.
“Years since what?” you pressed anyway. The tiny ripples preceding bliss had already begun to stir inside you, maddeningly, with every flick of his thumb, but your curiosity to know the whole truth was stronger still.
Bucky’s hips were moving at a feverish pace now; his free hand made a fist in the sheets beside your head, and his chest heaved with a series of short, ragged breaths that were no doubt meant to mask his moans as well. Notwithstanding the burn you felt between your legs—he really was much rougher and stronger now, you saw—you cupped his cheek again to tilt his face toward yours.
What you saw made your stomach drop.
Your heart clenched like a fist within the confines of your ribcage, and there it was—that terrible ache you felt each time you saw something awful materialize before you.
Bucky’s eyes were wet with tears. He wouldn’t blink.
He tilted his head into your touch, as if for support, but really, the weight of it signaled to you that he just wanted to feel you. Be assured that you were there. His big, broad arms seemed suddenly unable to hold his weight, and then he sank into your frame with a grunt and another stuttered breath. Like he was ready to collapse.
“Don’t leave again,” he said quietly.
The pain in your chest elevated, in bloom.
“Bucky I didn’t— wasn’t—” you started to say.
The friction between your bodies was almost too much to bear. You couldn’t be sure if you were talking to your husband, soldat, or some strange, inconceivable mixture of the two, but you could tell that this one was desperate.
Pleading.
“I can’t lose you again.”
The head of his cock grazed your most sensitive spot inside, and a whine seeped out through your teeth. Bucky’s whole body was blanketing yours, torso flush with your front and hips working an erratic cadence as he got a glimpse of release himself. He groaned out in pleasure and begged you to stay. You promised that you would. Your legs were still wound around his sides, but both of your bodies were slick with a sheen of sweat; it was hard to hang on. Bucky’s hair was wild and pushed back from his face, but his eyes were clear when they finally met yours, and you heard him mumble again, ‘Please stay.’
You didn’t know what else to say but okay, baby, I will.
You swore you would stay, and in between oaths, your mouth was consumed by a barrage of kisses—Bucky got to feast with a full set of teeth again, primal as ever—and then your climax hit. Euphoria washed over you whole with a force you weren’t expecting to feel, and you couldn’t help but cry out and whine as waves of pleasure coursed straight from the innermost depths of your core.
Bucky’s hips collided with yours in two more stuttered thrusts, and when he bottomed out at the last, you felt a heavy spurt of warmth. A groan coiling out of his chest. Muscles growing lax and two sturdy arms coming to bracket your head as your husband’s whole body weight went folding into yours. You kissed some more, in between frenzied intakes of breaths and steadying moments where you were simply trying to ground your body and get your heart to slow down to a normal rate.
You held each other in silence for a while. Bucky’s head fell next to yours on the pillow when the last of his spend had been emptied, but otherwise, he didn’t stir. At some point, his hands slid behind your back, and the second he hugged you to him, you felt secure in that embrace.
You were probably as far as you’d ever been from understanding who the fuck your husband was, but all it seemed you were capable of feeling for now was pity.
Pity for the years he’d lost to captivity; pity for what was little more than mere existence under HYDRA’s thumb; pity for all the things you still didn’t know about his past.
You held Bucky tighter, and, flooded with this strange, grating emotion and an overwhelming sense of powerlessness, you wished you could protect him, too.
“James?” you mumbled into his hair.
Bucky didn’t respond.
You squeezed his shoulder. Still nothing.
Against your better judgment, you tried to shift yourself underneath his body. You figured you wouldn’t make it far at all, but at least he would be aware that you were trying to get up. Maybe even start to move with you.
He didn’t.
It took everything in you just to wedge an elbow back, struggle to prop yourself up against his weight, and when you were about to let out a huff of an exasperated laugh and tell him, Bucky, you’re crushing me, honey, could you please ease up a little, your request was answered before the words could even leave your mouth.
At the sound of two new muffled voices carrying up from the living room and what appeared to be noises from shuffling feet, Bucky rose straight from the bed, off you.
Your gaze trailed his to the door, and you reached for him.
“Baby, it’s just—”
Bucky was back on his feet. Yanking his boxers and pants up his legs and buckling his belt in no time at all.
The movers. It’s just the movers bringing in furniture—
You moved your hand closer to your husband in the hopes of stalling his movements for half a second, but then a set of ruthless blue eyes had you pinned, quick:
“Stay.”
Your outstretched arm was taken up in a much stronger, stiffer one, and you were suddenly pulled over to Bucky.
But you knew from the eyes it wasn’t him at all.
And you weren’t so much being tugged toward him as you were being hauled to the floor. Thrown on your knees beside the bed, next to Bucky. He was about to leave.
Without thinking, you reached for one of the legs of his trousers and sank your nails into the fabric to hold him in place, to tell him again that there was nothing to see out there but the people you knew, no threat outside at all. But Bucky was deaf to your pleas, it seemed. He shrugged you off easily and made a move for his gun, expression blank, stolid, calm, hardened. Decided.
You tried to rise to your feet but were stopped.
“STAY,” Bucky boomed again, this time an order that he didn’t even deign to complete with a look your way.
If he had—if he even possessed the ability to consider anything but the immediate task at hand—he would’ve seen his own hand knock you to the floor to keep you from standing. Might’ve caught a glimpse of the instant your head struck the edge of the nightstand before you hit the ground. Could’ve even made out the first traces of blood that came trickling out from above your temple. Would’ve seen you cower back, viscerally, out of fear.
But holding the side of your head and watching him leave, grim realization twisted at the pit of your stomach, and you knew the man wouldn’t have stopped if he had.
If your soldat’s objective was to protect you from any harm lurking outside that door, real or illusory, nothing you were capable of doing now could stop that. At expense to yourself, at expense to him, at expense to whatever lives stood between the Winter Soldier and that unwavering, hardwired goal, he still would not ever stop.
Thinking of new, innocent lives in the balance, now, you scrambled for your phone the next second to call Steve.
You tried him once. Twice. A third time crawling on your knees, then standing, then staggering over to the door and pulling the phone from your ear just to send a string of texts to your friend while the thing continued to ring.
SOS
Need help
Pick up please
Bucky’s stuck and he’s
About to hurt people here
A crash sounded outside. You hurried to the door. Your hand closed around the knob and tried to turn it. The handle turned freely, but something behind it was refusing to let you leave the room. You pressed again.
“Bucky!”
Your cry was useless in the face of the barricade outside.
You pushed your shoulder and, behind it, the whole force of your weight against it anyway, trying to get out.
The line went dead. You tried again.
Now with your phone to one ear and the bedroom door taking the brunt of your hits from the other, bleeding side of your body, you scarcely heard much of anything else. The ring started. Stopped. Began again when you pressed a shaky finger to Steve’s contact name, and continued in a cycle for some time while you tried to force whatever was on the other side of the door away.
The second a voice broke through the haze of your frantic, half-crazed state of consciousness, you cried:
“STEVE!”
“Mrs. Barnes?”
You were shocked to hear a woman on the other end. Your pulse was still racing, shoulder aching from the impact of each desperate push you’d been forcing against the door, and then you stopped. Another loud something sounded down the hallway, further away, but you were too startled and unnerved to take any note of it.
You started to ask, ‘Where’s Steve?’ when the voice continued:
“This is Mrs. Barnes?”
“Yes,” you answered woodenly.
You held the phone as close to your ear as you could, but still, the woman’s words were coming in and out in bursts. You must’ve mistakenly accepted the call when trying to reach Steve—you couldn’t think right now; could barely retract the phone far enough to see a strange number displayed on the screen. You swallowed.
“—from Lenox Hill Hospital at Northwell Health—”
The high-rise medical center on the Upper East Side you’d visited that week. Bucky had wanted you tested for nutritional deficiencies and anemia, of all fucking things.
“—if you had a moment or two to chat and maybe—”
No, you needed Steve, not this outpatient courtesy call.
You would’ve liked to hang up. Should’ve hung up. In fact, your fingers were practically itching to hit the button the whole time the nurse was speaking to you, but something in you just couldn’t be persuaded to do it. It took several more seconds before your senses began to creep back, and by then, when you were about to drop the call, you heard a phrase that stopped you on a dime.
“—but the doctor advises prenatal vitamins—”
“What?” you snapped, far more harshly than you meant.
The nurse paused a beat, whether from incredulity at how rude you’d just sounded or to consider something. When she resumed, she sounded a little more guarded.
“Yes…Dr. Watkins did reach out to you about your bloodwork from your last visit, didn’t she? I thought—”
“No,” you said, rushed and painfully brusque, again. You tried to rein in your tone some before continuing, “She didn’t—didn’t reach out about anything. What vitamins?”
Another pause.
“Prenatals.”
You hated that she gave you another second to chew on that word before taking a breath and pressing on.
“I’m terribly, terribly sorry to be the one to spring that on you, Mrs. Barnes—I thought you knew…um—” The nurse was sheepish now, almost embarrassed to be speaking, “—you’re about…three weeks along in your pregnancy.”
Three weeks along.
Advised prenatal vitamins.
For the child growing inside of you.
A rivulet of blood trickled into your left eye.
Your whole body was apt to convulse, but it didn’t.
You hung up.
Taglist: (please lmk if I missed anyone! I can only tag 50 at a time so will continue in a separate post) @vicmc624 @she-could-never @mcira @kentokaze @identity2212 @unaxv, @buchi91, @ordelixx @stinkerbelle007 @opibarnes @wilsons-striped-ties @desigirlxx @pono-pura-vida @geminiflanagansblog @buggy14 @sky-full-0f-fl0wers @buckysdoll1520 @armystay89 @minimarvelingmarvel @kunakizen @ghostiebby06 @blackhawkfanatic @dameron-grantspector @sushiseoks @deansapplepie @mrsjoequinn @gyokujyn @lunaroserites @first-edition @kaybaby2494, @jaggedsi @excusememrbarnes @daisychainsoflove @mostlymarvelgirl @diannana @shawnberry @yujyujj @urmomsalex @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @athenabarnes @christinabae @sluttylittlewaistenthusiast @wintrsoldrluvr @bethbunnyy @i-heart-smut @aagn360 @dahliawolfe @fantasyfootballchampion @lilyevanstan1325 @kandis-mom @thealyrs
2K notes · View notes
yandere-romanticaa · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
An idea that I really like is Ratio falling for someone who is his complete and total opposite in every way imaginable.
He is the kind of person that operates on pure cold logic and facts. He believes in what he sees in front of him with his own two eyes and yes, while it may be fascinating, perhaps even a little entertaining, to philosophize about various unimaginable concepts they are all indeed just that.
Concepts. Ideas. Things made up from the bottom of the bored human psyche.
Veritas Ratio is a man who is able to grasp many, dare he say, possibly every concept he has ever encountered. He loves a challenge but hardly anything is challenging to him because he is such a genius. He devours books that are over a thousand pages long, the most complicated equations of any science are finished by his hand with such ease that many people might mistake him for a machine rather than a man of flesh and blood.
That's what makes it so fun to see him fall for an airhead. A person who probably doesn't care, or doesn't have the mental capacity to care about such things. This person would rather spend their days dallying away, picking flowers, baking, just doing things that are so mundane and plain (to him). If they do decide to read, it is some trashy romance model, maybe even just straight up written porn if they're just that shameless.
And this is the person who has Ratio grabbing his head in frustration.
He's shaking with anger in his room, golden eyes wobbly as he watches you walk up and down the space ship. You got lost, again. How much of an imbecile are you? Do you truly need someone to guide you through everything? With a huff, the scientist grabs his head made of plaster and makes his exist. He puts the mask on and in no time finds you, all lost in the hallways. You hear his upcoming footsteps before you see him and once you turn around, you are greeted with that bizarre mask you've grown so accustomed to.
You greet the man cheerfully, to which he just huffs. With his arms crossed, Ratio gives you a long and detailed lesson on how you ought to be more careful and aware of your surroundings, that this kind of behavior will not be tolerated. You are not a child and should stop acting like one.
Tears swell in your eyes but none are shed as the two of you turn back, him being a few steps ahead of you. Two pairs of footprints sound incredibly loud in this long and dark corridor. Veritas hears you quietly weeping and he feels the slight inkling of guilt pulling his heartstrings.
... Perhaps he was a smidge too harsh with you.
You are a clueless creature, sure. But maybe, he sometimes reveled in that fact. It was wrong and he would never admit it out loud but his heart whispered it clearly to him - you like this.
Veritas watched you carefully through the reflection of the window, the plaster head concealing the expression on his face. With your lips in a full pout and eyes watery like fresh morning dew, he couldn't help but to be just slightly charmed.
He scoffed to himself as he pressed onwards. He figured he had better standards for himself but that was not the case, clearly.
And just like that, he had escorted you back to your room. He could hear you mumble out a quiet thank you, which he acknowledged with a polite nod with his head.
He's not that cruel. Or rude for that matter!
With the situation now swiftly dealt with, Ratio figured it was high time he went back to his studies. He has already wasted far too much precious time on this, he isn't even sure when he'll finish that -
His train of thought is broken when he feels a pair of arms gently embrace him from behind, the warmth welcoming and dare he say sweet.
Veritas stilled, his body like the statue which some saw him to be. You still could not see his face but his anger could still be felt.
"Just what do you think you are doing?" he spat at you, his tone cold but venomous.
He felt your face being pressed against his broad back, fat tears caking his fine clothing. Just as he was about to pry your hands off him, he heard you finally speak:
"Thank you for helping me. Really..."
Your tone was soft and remorseful. You did not want to disturb him but despite that, you did just that. He was willing to accept your apology and have this situation be over with but what you said next simply knocked all of the air out of his lungs.
"You see, I... I wasn't sure how I could get your attention. I just wanted you to notice me, to talk to me..."
.... Goodness.
He was used to people trying to get his attention but to act like such a pathetic damsel in distress was new. He had to give you credit for your creativity, at the very least.
"I want to be your friend. I also want you to teach me all sorts of things-"
Ratio stopped listening to you mid sentence, his mind running hundreds of laps in thought. Perhaps you weren't the idiot he saw you as. Your little ploy worked, clearly. And if he took you under his wing, who knew what would become of you.
He could turn you into a diamond with his own two hands.
It was embarrassing just how giddy the thought made him.
The shadows of curiosity and some other emotions took over his mind as he analyzed the situation. There really was no harm in taking you all for himself.
Besides, if you were capable of this deceitful plan, who knew what else you could do?
He was eager to find out.
2K notes · View notes
yanderestarangel · 8 months
Note
Hi! I was wondering if you can write headcanons for bi han, kuai liang, and Tomas with a reader who is shy in bed
HEADKANONS MK1 | TRIO LIN KUEI | "HOW THEY REACTED TO A SHY READER IN BED?" + BONUS: "How they act in bed?"
TW: afab anatomy, vaginal sex, smut.
Tumblr media
✧ BI HAN ✧
He is a serious man, but not shy, especially in bed. Bi Han has two types of reactions while fucking: either being very loud, letting out hoarse grunts and being aggressive or just making low grunts against your skin. But if you're the shy one, he'll make you moan, no matter what it takes, Bi Han wants to hear him pleasuring you with his dick inside your pussy or any other hole. If he notices that you're holding back your moans, he'll sigh, giving you a weak but delicious slap on the ass. The first times between the two of you will be like this with Bi Han looking at you beneath him, too shy to moan as he fucks you with all his might, he even finds your efforts to hide from him with the pillow or sheets cute, he will just take away any physical imposition of your body and seeing your pussy and breasts being fucked by him, while Bi Han teased you.
"-Come on (Y/N) gem, don't be a shy little slut, I know you love my dick." / "-Do you want me to touch you here?" -Bi Han would speak provocatively, taking two fingers to your clitoris and massaging it while still fucking you with his cock, leading to you finally moaning loudly and his name, the grand master will be extremely proud of himself, satisfied with having pulled one such a beautiful reaction from you. "-Hmmph... Finally baby, just moan more for me, I want more of this, scream cumming on my dick, be my good boy/good girl, make me proud." -He finishes this by giving you another hard slap on the ass, while grabbing the soft flesh of your hips.
✧ KUAI LIANG ✧
He is also a serious man, but a warm lover in many ways - excuse the pun lol - he wants to be loved and love back, to be cared for and to care for and this applies in bed. He tends to be more vocal, not being too loud or being too quiet - Liang likes to let you know how much he's loving it, letting out medium moans with his mouth either open or in your ear, breathing heavily as he fucks your pussy. Kuai is a man of vision that is, he likes and wants to see your body and hear your moans, if you try to cover yourself and he realizes how shy you are/are at the moment he will be understanding and ask if everything is ok, if do you want to stop or if he is giving you enough pleasure - when you explain it, he will still be gently pushing into your pussy, while watching you from the side, grabbing the pillow and hiding your body from him making him smile a little, while using his hips in slow, slightly circular movements, making you moan, finally he doesn't mean anything, he just wants to hear you looking beautiful and receiving pleasure from him.
Kuai thinks your body is perfection, your sweet moans coming out with each thrust of his and he will do his best to hear you moan and show yourself to him, he loved seeing you writhe on top of his dick, he would push it to the base while smiling slightly giving you a kiss on the cheek and whispering in your ear: "-You're so beautiful, you know (Y/N)? Drooling and getting dirty on my dick, you're so desperate to cum, aren't you? Even though you give a sweet little shy thing, I love it Seeing you like this, seeing you moan, your body is mine and I'm going to please you and make you cum until you can't feel your legs anymore." -Kuai whispered, increasing the pace of his hips, fucking your pussy harder, he was going to make his promise count that night.
✧ TOMAS VRBADA ✧
An extremely noisy and needy man. Holy shit, Tomas moans so loud sometimes that it echoes throughout your house, he can't control the moans and whimpers, even shedding some tears because he's super stimulated by your pussy, telling you sweet things with his voice choked with lust, holding your hips tightly. But he wasn't always like that, the first night with him you will both be very shy, especially Tomas because he hasn't been with anyone other than you yet, but after that night he will be so vocal, his moans are hoarse and exciting enough to make you cum in minutes - believe me. When Vrbada realizes that your shyness has not passed, he will ask you if everything is ok and if he is doing it right, how to stimulate your clitoris too, because he wants to hear you moan as loud as him, he wants to see your sweaty and flushed body while stick the 20 centimeters of his dick in your cunt, he will beg and whimper for you to take the sheet off your beautiful body, and he won't hold back with the moans, just moan for this man as loud as you can, the more loud you moan, but his dick will fuck your pussy. "-Yes my little angel... Fuuuck~ so tight, and those beautiful breasts? Just waiting to be fucked, aren't you? You're so beautiful (Y/N) so beautiful to me, moan and dirty my cock, beautiful little slut."
Tumblr media
©YANDERESTARANGEL 2023
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
solarmorrigan · 5 months
Text
Hands Where I Can See Them, Part 3
Part 1 | Part 2
Eddie doesn’t sleep until the small hours of the morning. Mostly, he spends the night going over and over things in his head, wondering at everything he’d somehow misread.
The way Steve had always stayed after they had sex. The way he’d curled close to Eddie, showering him with soft touches and affection well after he’d technically needed to. The way Steve had started cooking dinner; trying out new, fancy-sounding recipes and trying to make it special, even when it was just the two of them. The way Steve had brought Eddie fucking flowers once, and had met his skeptical look with a shrug, saying that he figured maybe no one had ever bothered to bring Eddie flowers, and “Everyone deserves to get them once in a while.”
(The way Eddie had encouraged Steve to stay, had eaten up every bit of affection and hungered for more, had nudged playfully at Steve’s feet under the table while they ate, had kept those flowers well past death and still has one pressed between the pages of a notebook.)
It had all been there, so plain that even his bandmates had seen it, but Eddie – Eddie hadn’t let himself consider for a moment that it was something he could have. And now, because he’d told himself he couldn’t have something like that, he doesn’t get to.
A self-fulfilling fucking prophesy.
He finally falls asleep, miserable and alone in his bed for the first time in weeks, and wakes to someone banging on the front door.
Full rays of sunlight are streaming through Eddie’s window, and a quick glance at the clock tells him that it’s a lot later in the morning than he’d anticipated Steve showing up to get his things. One of the few complaints Eddie has (had) about sleeping with Steve is his chronic and apparently incurable early-riserism, but it’s past eleven a.m.
It’s late enough, in fact, that Wayne has probably come home and is trying to sleep, so Eddie rolls out of bed to get to the door before the knocking wakes Wayne.
Shedding his own sleepy haze as he jogs for the door, it occurs to Eddie that Steve knows Wayne’s work schedule and that, no matter how pissed he is, he wouldn’t be petty enough to take it out on Wayne.
So then who–
Eddie pulls the door open, interrupting his visitor mid-knock, to reveal the scowling face of Robin Buckley.
–ah.
Well, Eddie can’t say he hadn’t been expecting her, but he’d sort of assumed she would come with Steve attached. He glances out towards the driveway and sees only his van, Wayne’s truck, and Robin’s bike.
“He’s not here,” Robin says, curt and sharp. “I just came to get some of his stuff.”
That, Eddie hadn’t been expecting. He knows he fucked up, he knows Steve is hurt, but so much so that he’s outright avoiding Eddie? Eddie doesn’t think there’s ever been a conflict that Steve hasn’t met head-on, and he hadn’t expected this to be an exception.
All the same, he steps aside to let Robin in, prepared to fetch whatever she needs. He’d spent part of the night wondering whether he should gather Steve’s stuff up to make it easier for him, or if that would make it look like he was eager to have Steve out of his life; he’d eventually decided to just leave everything where it is.
“He said his migraine meds are here. And his spare glasses,” Robin says, and shit, that would explain where Steve is.
“How bad is it?” Eddie asks.
“Bad.” Robin answers shortly.
Eddie nods, gesturing for Robin to follow him back towards the bathroom.
He doesn’t know much about migraines, but he’s been learning. He knows most of Steve’s triggers (prolonged loud noise, heat, no sleep, stress) and he knows how to keep things dark and calm when one hits. He’s sat with Steve through a particularly bad attack, lying in bed with him, holding him carefully, watching tears stream out from beneath closed eyelids (not an emotional response so much as a physical reaction to the overwhelming pain) and feeling like his own eyes might well up, too, for the frustration of how useless he’d felt.
He directs Robin to the medicine cabinet and leaves her there while he heads back to his bedroom for Steve’s glasses. When he comes back, he sees Robin shoving some of Steve’s hair products into her backpack and feels a pang of upset somewhere in his chest. The shampoo had been one of the first pieces of Steve that had found permanent residence at Eddie’s place, sliding in next to his own soap after Steve had spent several mornings in a row complaining about not having his usual shit to shower with.
At the time, it had only made sense for Steve to have some toiletries there, since he stayed over so often. In retrospect, Eddie can see how it could have seemed like permission – and invitation. Welcoming. (And hell – hadn’t it been?)
Eddie hands Robin the glasses, and she tucks them carefully into a side pocket.
“I can’t stay away very long,” Robin says, voice crackling with banked anger, “so if you’re going to try to give me a reason not to come back later and kill you, make it snappy.”
(Make it snappy. Eddie almost wants to laugh, sort of wants to cry; it sounds exactly like the lame kind of turn of phrase Robin would have picked up from Steve.)
For all Eddie prides himself on his ability to improvise, on his extemporaneous speeches and infamous rants, he comes up empty. He’d spent all night wondering how he could have missed it all, why he hadn’t paid more attention, and he doesn’t even have an answer for himself, much less for Robin.
All he can really tell her is, “I didn’t know.”
“Oh, bullshit, you didn’t know!” Robin snaps, and Eddie rushes to quiet her. “Don’t you shush–”
“You can be pissed, just do it quietly,” Eddie hisses. “My uncle is asleep.”
The barest fraction of ire slips from Robin’s expression, and she jerks her head back towards the living area, following behind when Eddie goes.
“We both know Steve,” she says once they’re standing by the half wall that separates the kitchen from the living room, voice lower now but no less intense. “When he loves, he does it loud. Everyone else could see it from miles away, and it was right in your face. There is no way you didn’t know.”
“I didn’t–” Eddie drags a hand down his face in aggravated uncertainty as he tries to articulate. “I didn’t know it was an option!”
Robin’s eyes narrow, arms crossing over her chest as she regards him suspiciously. “You’re gonna have to elaborate on that one, Munson.”
“I mean – I’ve hooked up with people before, and it… didn’t change anything. Sex is just sex, right? Sex with a stranger doesn’t make them less strange, sex with a bar buddy doesn’t magically make you closer, and I thought – with Steve, I just didn’t think it would – I just didn’t think,” Eddie admits. “I never thought he’d want to be more than my friend, I didn’t think he liked relationships, I figured what we had already was more than I could possibly have earned, so I just never even let it be an option. Practically fucking blinded myself, apparently. Just told myself it was ridiculous and… here we are.”
“That’s depressing as hell, first of all,” Robin says, tone still sharp, “but it’s not a good goddamn excuse. What the hell would you have even done differently if you’d thought it was an option?”
“Honestly?” Eddie gives a strained laugh, letting his head fall back and making his confession to the ceiling. “Probably the exact same fucking things, just– on purpose. Sooner. More. I would’ve… known, and I could’ve appreciated it.”
There’s a long moment of silence, and when Eddie finally looks back down, Robin’s eyes are boring into him, startling in their intensity. It feels like she’s flaying him down past the bone, down to whatever the hell is at the core of him.
“Let me make this clear: I am not on your side. I will never be on your side if it comes down to you or Steve,” Robin says slowly, and Eddie only nods, because he knows that already. “Because, you know, I have never seen him happier than when he was with you – or when he thought he was with you, or whatever the fuck happened. But I have also never seen him more upset than he was last night, and I never want to see it again. You fucking crushed him, Eddie. You made him feel like he was stupid for seeing things that weren’t there, you treated everything the two of you did together like it meant nothing, you humiliated him in front of your friends–”
Eddie winces. “I didn’t mean–”
“I know,” Robin cuts in sharply. “If I thought you’d done any of that on purpose, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. I’d probably already be crossing state lines to avoid murder charges. I know you didn’t mean to, but that’s not a fucking excuse. It still happened.”
“Okay, I know I fucked up. I know,” Eddie grinds out. “But you can’t get on my ass for not acknowledging a relationship I didn’t even know I was in. We never talked about it, okay?”
“It’s not about the relationship!” Robin only just keeps her voice to a hushed yell. “Should Steve have tried to talk to you seriously about it? Put a real label to it? Probably, yeah! But you–” she jabs a finger at him, “you didn’t pay any attention to him. You didn’t think about whether his feelings might change, you didn’t think about why he was acting differently around you, you didn’t think at all, you just took.”
Eddie opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He wants to argue that Steve is an adult who can make his own decisions, who had made his own decision, and he certainly hadn’t started sleeping with Eddie blindly. He wants to say that Steve had known what it meant to fall into bed with him, but he’s starting to understand that maybe he’s the one who hadn’t realized what it meant to fall into bed with Steve.
“You took him for granted, and that’s– that’s the worst part in all of this. Even if you were in some bullshit friends with benefits arrangement, you’re still supposed to be friends, but you just–” Robin pauses, pursing her lips around a frown. “People don’t fight for Steve, you know that? They just– I don’t know why, but they don’t, and it makes me so fucking angry, because he just gives people everything, without even thinking about it. He makes loving people look so easy that they forget that it's not and they take it for granted. They don’t treat it like it’s something special to hold onto. And I didn’t think you would be on the list of people who let him down like that.”
Eddie sort of wishes Robin had just tried to hit him instead. It would hurt less.
“I don’t… I don’t know how to fix this,” he admits. “You can yell at me all you want, and I’ll deserve it, but that’s not going to make it better. It’s not gonna make me suddenly able to un-fuck everything up.”
“I’m yelling at you because I want you to understand exactly what you did,” Robin says. “Because he’s going to forgive you.”
“He’s– what?” Eddie asks brows furrowed.
“We both know he is. Of course he’s going to forgive you. He’s probably already halfway to convincing himself this was all his fault. I’m not saying he won’t be angry and hurt for a while, but– he’ll forgive you, and he’ll want to be your friend again,” Robin says, low and serious. “So, no, you can’t un-fuck up. But make sure you’re worth that forgiveness.”
Eddie isn’t sure what to say to that. He isn’t sure there is anything to say to that. But it seems like Robin is done with him anyway. She hikes her bag higher up on her shoulders and turns for the door.
“Hey,” he finally manages, and Robin turns back to cut an impatient look at him. “I can give you a ride back. If you want. Get the meds back to him faster.”
“I can get back just fine,” Robin says, pulling the door open and tossing one last shot back at him as she leaves. “You were fine dismissing him last night – why start caring now?”
The door bangs shut behind her, robbing Eddie of the chance to argue – and he would have, because he does. He fucking does care about Steve. And if Steve gives him the chance, Eddie is going to fucking prove it.
No one fights for Steve? Fine. Then Eddie’s going to start right now.
Part 4
-
Tags: @bushbees, @y0urnewstepp4r3nt
921 notes · View notes
zegrasdrysdale · 1 month
Note
Could you write a smut with Ethan Edwards like after a bad game or something? Thankssss!!
[ make me forget ] e. edwards
Tumblr media
paring : Ethan Edwards x fem!reader
summary : Ethan confides in his girlfriend after a rough loss in the Frozen Four
warning(s) : smut ! very much more love making than fucking, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy), p in v sex, blowjob, use of nicknames during sex (pretty girl, baby, etc.), little bit of dirty talk
author’s note : waited until the umich season ended before i tackled this request because if they had lost in the frozen four (which they did), i thought it would be the perfect plot for this request. the way they lost was really rough so be prepared for sad ethan for a lil bit
༺═──────────────═༻
Her heart breaks when the final buzzer goes off. Boston College is quick to celebrate their four-to-nothing win over Michigan. Her eyes are on Ethan as he stands with Dylan and Tyler while the Duke boys shed some tears.
The tears that begin to fall down Ethan's cheeks while he stands with his teammates are her last straw. The tears that threatened to spill over onto her cheeks begin to roll. She quickly wipes them away so Ethan doesn't look over and see them.
All of the Michigan boys huddle near the bench as they watch another team move onto the finals for the third year in a row.
It breaks her heart that they have fought so hard for the past three years and no national title to show for it. They deserve it more than they know or realize at the moment.
Michigan shakes hands with Boston College at center ice before BC goes back to the locker room to celebrate the win. The Michigan boys raise their sticks for the last time this season, and for the last time for some of the boys. She shows her support by clapping and banging on the glass in front of her as they head down the tunnel.
Ethan looks at her as he waits to go down the tunnel. She shoots him a small smile that's mixed with fondness and sadness. If he smiles back at her, she can't see it because of the way his helmet sits on his head. His face is shiny and she can’t tell if it’s because he’s sweating or if it’s because he’s been crying.
Hopefully it’s because he’s been sweating because she doesn’t know if she can handle more tears from Ethan.
She makes her way to the hotel that she and the other girlfriends are staying at, which is also the hotel that the boys are staying at. None of them are really in the mood to hang around the arena to wait for their boyfriends.
Ethan knows her room number. It just might be a little bit because he comes knocking. He’s going to shower then spend some time with his teammates because this is the last time that Team 102 will be Team 102.
Some of his teammates are going to sign with their NHL team. She knows Frank is going to the NHL immediately like Luke did last year. He’ll sign within a day or two after they get back to Michigan. Dylan and Gavin have both said they’re probably going to sign with their teams too. A handful of other guys haven’t made an official decision yet but she’s sure that more will be leaving.
Then it’ll just be Ethan and Mark left from their class that came in almost four years ago.
Once she’s back in her hotel room that’s a few blocks from the arena, she finally relaxes. She pulls off the hat she was wearing as well as Ethan’s Michigan jacket. With a sigh, she flops onto her back on the bed.
If she’s feeling like this, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling. It sucks that they’re not moving onto the finals after getting shutout. It especially sucks that it’s now three years in a row that they’ve made it to the Frozen Four and haven’t been to the finals.
Like she said, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling after that game.
It’s nearly two hours after the game ends when there’s a very soft knock on her door. If she was sleeping or had in her AirPods then she wouldn’t have heard it. The TV is playing at a low volume so she was able to hear the knock.
When she swings the door open, she sees a very upset Ethan Edwards on the other side.
She pouts and pulls him into a hug, which pulls him into the room. The door swings shut behind Ethan. “I’m so sorry, Eddie,” she softly says into his ear. “I wish I could do something.”
“I know,” he replies. His voice is hoarse like all he’s been doing is crying. It breaks her heart a little more. “Needed to see you. I tried slipping away but coach made us stay for a little bit after we were all showered.”
She pulls back from the hug, leaving her arms draped around his neck. Ethan’s avoiding eye contact with her. It’s what he does when he’s upset.
When she pushes his hair out of his face, he leans down and puts his forehead on her shoulder. Her fingers find a home in his damp locks and holds him. His arms wrap around her waist.
“I’m so tired of feeling like this,” Ethan confesses after a few moments of silence. “It’s been three fucking years. First it was Denver, then it was Quinnipiac, and now it’s Boston College. Three years, three different teams. I’m tired.”
“I know, E,” she coos as she presses a kiss to his temple. “I can’t even begin to imagine how you feel. I know how rough it’s been for you and the guys.”
Ethan lifts his head up and finally looks at her. All she sees behind his eyes is sadness. She has to bite her lip from crying because his eyes are usually so bright. They are so dark right now.
“I have one more year,” he says. “One. I don’t think I can handle it if I’m in this position again next year. I probably won’t sign with the Devils this season so I can do this for one more year but I don’t think I can do this again. Feel like this again.”
She watches tears spill over his eyelids onto his cheeks. She dries his cheeks with her thumbs and gives him the smallest of smiles. “You’re going to lead your team to a national title next year as a senior, E,” she assures him. “It’s your year.”
Ethan nods without saying a word, but the way her eyes flicker to her lips tells her everything she needs to know. He grabs her hands off his face and loosely laces their fingers together.
“Can you do me a favor?” Ethan asks. She raises her eyebrows in confusion. “Can you just … help me forget for a little bit? I need to get my mind off of the last few hours.”
She blinks, not even surprised at his request. “Ethan, you are upset right now and you’re allowed to be,” she begins to say to him. “I just don’t want to take advantage of you since you’re not in the right mindset.”
He drops his forehead to hers. His eyes close. “Please, baby,” he whispers. “Make me forget. I need you to make me forget.”
It’s not like she was going to say no. She just needed to make sure it’s what he really wanted before she started something.
Ethan picks his head up and meets her eyes. She glances between them to make sure he’s okay before she pulls him down into a kiss.
The kiss starts out soft and slow but quickly turns rough and needy. Ethan’s hands rest on her sides and he lightly grips her waist so she can’t move away. Not that she was planning on going anywhere.
If Ethan wants her to help him forget the last few hours then she will.
She presses herself flush against Ethan’s chest and can feel the growing bulge against her thigh. Her fingers curl in his locks to keep him from breaking the kiss. She does walk forward a bit so Ethan’s back is pressed against the wall next to the door.
Her hands snake down from his hair and down his chest until they rest on the waistband of his dress pants. Ethan sucks her bottom lip between his teeth and pulls back, letting her lip snap back into place. She looks up at him and bites the same lip.
“You’re hot when you’re needy,” she tells Ethan as she begins to undo the button on his pants. “Just so you’re aware.”
“You’re hot all the time,” Ethan retorts as she finally gets the button undone. “Especially when you wear my clothes.” His comment confirms he saw her in his jacket during the game.
She just smiles at him and untucks his shirt from his pants before pulling him into another kiss.
Ethan pulls off the suit jacket he’s wearing and lets it fall to the floor. His hands come up to cup her jaw as he returns her kisses, each one getting needier and deeper.
After a few more kisses, she reluctantly pulls back. She notices how swollen and red his lips already are and she can’t help but smile at the sight of how disheveled he already looks.
Once she takes him all in, she sinks down to her knees in front of him. Ethan leans his head back and mumbles a “fuck” as she pulls his dress pants down so they pool around his ankles. His boxers are next and his semi pops out. Ethan ends up kicking the clothes away as well as his shoes.
She takes him in her hand and pumps him a few times. “Shit, baby,” Ethan breathes out. “You look so pretty on your knees for me.”
She sends him a smile before she wraps her lips around the reddening tip. Slowly, she takes his dick in her mouth and looks up at him. Ethan runs his fingers through her hair and pushes a loose piece behind her ear so her face is clear.
For once, she loves being able to do this for Ethan. He’s always focused on her pleasure and making sure that she is taken care of. She gets to return the favor. It’s not very often she gets to do this for him.
One of her hands rests on his thigh and the other slides up under his button-up. Her hand rests on his stomach for a moment before sliding as close to his chest as she can get. His hand rests on hers over his shirt.
She moves her head and sucks gently, being cautious of her teeth. She still gets flashbacks to the first time she blew him sometimes when her teeth accidentally got involved and there was almost a hospital trip that night.
Honestly, it’s probably why he rarely lets her blow him at this point in their relationship. It was a year before he let her try again.
Ethan’s hips roll slowly and he hits the back of her throat. She relaxes her jaw and throat as he begins to fuck her face. Soft pants pass Ethan’s lips as she hollows out her cheeks and lightly sucks. Her tongue swirls around his tip every so often.
“Baby, you keep doing that and I’m going to come before either of us are ready,” Ethan tells her.
She pulls off his dick with a pop and licks her lips. “Then we better move to the bed,” she replies as she stands up. “So you can fuck me instead of coming from a blowjob against a wall.”
Ethan’s eyes widen and he crashes their lips together. He hums softly and begins to walk toward the bed. She loses her t-shirt and her leggings are around her knees when she falls onto her back. The kiss breaks and she stares up at him.
He unbuttons his shirt and she pulls off her leggings. She is left in her bra and panties, but she’ll let Ethan take them off because it’s one of his favorite things to do when they have sex.
She moves back on the bed until her head hits the pillows. A completely naked Ethan crawls onto the mattress until he’s settled between her bent knees. One of his hands cups her jaw and he instigates a soft kiss. She wraps her hand around his wrist.
“I love you,” she mumbles. “I’ve loved you from year one and I’ll love you after next year. No matter what.”
Ethan smiles against her lips and she can’t help but smile against his. He pulls back and meets her eyes. “I love you,” he tells her. “I love that you’re here. It can’t be easy for you either.”
She shakes her head and traces Ethan’s cheekbones and jaw with thee fingers. “It sucks seeing you guys come so close and not getting the championship,” she admits. “I hate seeing you so upset, Eddie. It breaks my heart.”
“Gonna win one next year,” Ethan tells her as he leans in and presses kisses to her jaw. “For you. I’m gonna raise that trophy for you, baby.”
She smiles and wraps her arms around his neck. “Good,” she giggles. “You’d look hot with that trophy above your head.”
Ethan laughs and pulls back to look at her. His hair falls into his face as he looks down at her. “Then I’m definitely winning it,” he replies as she pushes his hair out of his face. “Right now though, I need to get you naked and get inside of you.”
He pulls her up so she is sitting up with her legs wrapped around his waist. She laughs when he reaches around her and unhooks her bra. He throws it to the floor before he kisses her. She falls back so her head hits the pillows again.
Ethan hovers over her and slithers a hand between them until it slides into her panties. He cups her core and she gasps against his mouth. “Eddie,” she breathes out.
“I’ve got you, baby,” he tells her. “Such a good girl for me being so wet. You want me that bad?”
She nods and whines when Ethan plays with her clit. “I wanna ride you,” she tells him. “Help you forget the game tonight like you want me to.”
He pulls back from the kiss and meets her eyes. “Yeah?” he asks. “Wanna ride me, pretty girl?”
With an eager nod, she manages to flip them over so she is straddling Ethan’s thighs. Ethan stares up at her with a shocked look on his face as she runs her hands from his stomach to his chest. “Let me take care of you, E,” she tells him. “Make you feel good.”
Ethan nods with his wide eyes.
She pulls her panties off, the lace ruined from how wet she was before she pulled them off. She straddles Ethan’s waist once she’s completely naked. His hands run up and down her sides for a second while she leans down and kisses his jaw.
After a second of this, she gets on her knees and grabs his dick. She lines him up with her entrance and Ethan’s hand rests on her waist. She slowly sinks down on his dick with a sigh.
No mather how many times they do this, she is still shocked with how big he is as he fills her up. She’ll never get over how he manages to fit inside of her every time.
She drops her head back as she slowly fills herself with Ethan’s dick. “That’s it, baby,” Ethan says. “You take my cock so well. Look so pretty sitting on my cock.”
She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth as Ethan bottoms out inside of her. His words shoot straight to her core. Ethan traces her sides for a second before he helps her begin to roll her hips. She sighs as he moves in and out of her.
“Fuck,” she gasps as she moves her hip. “Eddie.”
One of Ethan’s hands snakes between them and rubs her clit. She lets out a soft moan as Ethan works her close to an orgasm.
The bed creaks below them as she picks up speed. Her hands rest on his chest to keep her balance. Ethan’s lips are parted and his eyes are closed as she rides his dick.
It’s not a minute later when Ethan wraps his arms around her waist and rolls until he’s hovering over her. She looks up at him and smiles. Ethan mirrors the smile and slowly begins to roll his hips into her.
His dick moves in and out of her slowly, and deeply with the new angle. He hooks one of her legs over his shoulders so he can move as deep into her as he can.
Her fingers find a home in Ethan’s locks and pulls him down into a kiss. His movements remain slow and deep as he fucks her.
This doesn’t feel like fucking though. To her, it feels like more than that.
Ethan presses soft kisses to her wrists as he moves. She stares up at him and notices the soft look on his face. He looks almost relaxed.
“I love you,” Ethan softly pants. “So much, baby. I’m so lucky.”
“I’m so- ah- lucky,” she replies. “I’m so in love with you, E. Fuck.”
His speed picks up slightly and his thrusts get sloppy. He is close and she knows it.
She pushes the hair out of his face and pulls him down for a kiss. They both pant and groan as they get closer to their orgasms.
Her legs begin to shake and she feels the familiar knot in the pit of her stomach. Ethan’s fingers finding their way back to her clit almost undoes the knot. She cries out against Ethan’s lips.
“Come on my cock, baby,” Ethan mumbles against her lips. “Right behind you.”
“Come inside of me, Eddie,” she pants. “It’s okay. You know I’m on the pill.”
Ethan’s thrusts have slowed but he slams into her. She cries out a second later and clenches around Ethan’s dick. Her head is thrown back against the pillows and she cries his name. Her fingers dig into the skin on his back.
He shoots into her after a couple more thrusts. “Fuck,” he groans.
Her entire body melts into the mattress beneath her. Her breathing is labored as Ethan collapses on top of her. He lifts her head up and they share lazy kisses until he pulls out of her to clean her up.
She can’t move. Her body feels like jelly but the warm cloth feels good on her core and thighs. She whimpers as the cloth brushes over her sensitive core.
Ethan crawls back onto the bed and pulls the blankets on top of them. She manages to move so she can curl up against his side. She traces lazy shapes into his chest.
Silence fills the room, and it’s okay because she loves just being with Ethan.
Then a question rises in her head and she can’t resist asking. Especially when she knows that some of his teammates are leaving.
“Are you going to sign with the Devils?” she asks as she lifts her head. “It’s okay if you are. You know I’ll come to all the games that are closer to Mich-”
“I’m coming back for my senior year, baby,” he interrupts. “The Devils can wait. Shea is waiting too so it’s okay. We’re going to go together. You can’t get rid of me yet.”
She smiles and presses a soft kiss to his lips before she settles in for the night and falls asleep minutes later.
༺═──────────────═༻
MASTERLIST
have a request ? check out the guidelines first !
wanna be added to the taglist ? fill out this form !
taglist: @dasiysthings @equallyshaw @dancerbailey3 @love4lando @prettyinsatiable @ivy-34
346 notes · View notes
chososdiscordkitten · 5 months
Text
Boyfriend!Choso♡
Tumblr media
Pairing: Choso x Gn!reader
Content: Fluff, sfw, no use of y/n or pronouns, readers appearance isnt mentioned, talk of marriage, sooo many cuddles, Choso's love language is acts of service, mentions of skin picking from anxiety, John wick movies mentioned lol
Word count: 3.5k
(a.n) I wrote this bcs I miss him sm, I shed a few tears while writing this btw. He's my pookie bear. finally putting my endless amount of books of love poems to work! I wrote this while listening to 'We'll Never Have Sex- Leith Ross' if u were curious:3
When I think about Choso as your boyfriend, I picture him being so gentle and delicate whenever it comes to you. Always a small sweet smile on his lips whenever he did something for you. As small as it was- all he needed was a simple “Awe, thank you Cho.” from you and a kiss on his cheek and he was set for the day. If you were studying for your college final, he’s the kind of person to bring you a warm cup of fresh coffee, “Careful-” he’d urge, seeing your hand reach for it. “It's hot.” Warning you, even if he was holding it from the bottom before he came to give it to you. I see Choso adoring kisses from you. Small pecks on his cheek or his forehead. In his mind it was your way to say thank you, even if it wasn't needed. But he loved how his chest swelled when you'd say, “Oh, Choso. You're so sweet.” your hand going to your chest and your eyebrows pinched together. Early in your relationship Choso noticed how much he liked hearing you praise him. Even if it was a quiet “Thank You.” followed by a warm smile. He liked knowing that you enjoyed his acts of service. It was his form of showing affection, thinking that he wasn't good with his words. And feeling like hugs and kisses weren't enough to make you feel his love. The best way Choso could describe it is wanting you to keep him in your pocket, when you commented that to him he liked the idea so much that it got stuck in his head. The idea of him living in your pocket so he was always with you, always there in case you needed a warm hug. He liked seeing your face light up when you came home from work after having a bad day. Only needing to see him in order to feel better. It also helped that he always greeted you by the door with a warm smile on his lips. Always taking your coat off for you, and asking how your day was.
Choso feels things so deeply, even mentioning the day you might break up made him nervous. Making his hands clammy and his eyebrows furrow. “If I tell you this, you have to promise me that you will never tell anyone.” You tell him, the two of you sitting faces inches apart, legs criss crossed like two children sharing secrets. He opened his mouth to talk, his hand going to his chest and laying flat against his oversized white t-shirt. “I promise, I will never tell anyone.” serious look on his face as he vowed to you. “Cho, I'm serious, even if one day you hate me- you cannot tell a soul.” you smiled, seeing Choso’s eyebrows furrow. “I would never hate you. Never in my life will I ever hate you-” he promised, his hand reaching down to hold yours as his eyes went wide with worry. “And if one day I tell you that I do- that is not me.” he smiled. Making you laugh as you clutched his hand. Smiling before leaning in to kiss his forehead, Choso’s eyes blinking shut as his cheeks turned warm. Pulling away and looking at his now calm eyes, “Okay-” you smiled, before pulling his head to your lips and whispering in his ear. 
I think the way Choso loves is pure and unconditionally. The kind of love that was shown by his actions rather than his words. Like when you cut your finger while mincing some vegetables for lunch. Choso would wipe it gently with hydrogen peroxide. Wincing with you as though he felt the sting on your finger. Mumbles of “You have to be careful.” as he wrapped it delicately. Placing a gentle kiss on the bandage before cleaning up. Any time he saw a bruise on your calf, he hissed as his fingers pressed it. “Where'd that come from?” he asked, his voice pained as he rubbed it gently. “No idea. Didn't even know it was there.” you smiled, feeling him press a soft kiss to it. To Choso, all wounds and bruises are healed with kisses. He knew that if you treated something with love and care, it would heal quicker. His theory made you smile as he swore that it was true. Remembering his theory when you'd hold his hands, your soft fingers examining his calloused ones as he watched a show you had put on. Almost feeling the pain in your own hands when you saw the sides of his fingertips bright pink. Small scabs forming at the sides of his fingernails, sharp pain in your heart as your eyes scanned them. Knowing he picked at the skin anytime he got anxious. Choso turned his head to look at you to see what was wrong. Seeing your saddened eyes on his fingers. Lifting them up and placing kisses to the tips of them one by one. Your eyes closed as he felt his heart swell.
The way Choso loves is an adoration only seen in movies. The kind of love that teenage girls write about in their diaries. The kind of love that no matter what you've gone through, he will stay by your side. Feet planted to the ground and arm wrapped around you. The kind of man who would defend your actions- no matter if they're wrong, with an iron fist. The kind of love where if you were lost at sea, he'd sail through the endless salt water till he found you. Love so pure, you were unsure of it at first. Only ever seeing this kind of love in movies and tv shows. But he assured you quickly, this wasn't any movie or tv show. His warm hands on your face always reminded you of that. You'd close your eyes and feel him kiss your cheeks, placing one onto your brow bone, onto the bridge of your nose. However many kisses it took to make sure you knew that this wasn't some fairytale. Choso would get tears in his eyes when he heard you speak about the trials you were put through growing up. Crumbling completely at your words, hearing your voice started to shake and your eyes turned red with tears. Not being able to understand how anyone could hurt you. To him you were precious. Even thinking about the tears you’ve shed over your pain, made him sad. He never understood how people could be so cruel, especially to you. He hated seeing you sad. He hated seeing you in bed all day, he hated seeing you pick at your food. Choso hated seeing your lips chapped and cracking while you tried to assure him that you were okay with a smile. He is such an empath when it comes to you, always trying his hardest to cheer you up. 
Choso’s favorite moments with you were the ones where he would hold you close. Slow dancing in the living room by candle light when the lights went out. Violent rain and thunder outside as he hummed the tune of a song. Stumbling feet as you both tried to figure out the movements. And every night before bed when you held onto him as though he would disappear in your hands if you let go. Feeling your fingertips press into his clothed skin, face nuzzled to his chest. His chin on the top of your head, his hand rubbing your back as he lulled you to sleep. Even in deep slumber, he never lets you go. Most nights going to sleep in each others arms and waking up still clinging to each other, somehow feeling like two puzzle pieces coming together. Most of the moments you shared together were spent in silence. Only in eachothers arms. Eyes closed as you felt the feelings of stress and the worries of life fade away in his arms. His hand caressing the side of your face as you drifted to sleep. Choso loved hearing your heartbeat, feeling your warmth against the side of his face as he tried counting how many times you breathed per minute. To him it was like counting sheep before going to bed. I don't think Choso would be the type to use pet names, preferring the intimacy of calling you by your name. But he loved hearing you say his name, the way your voice always said it so sweetly. He loved your voice. Just hearing you whisper, "Good morning-" before kissing his cheek made him giddy in the morning. That's why he would insist on you reading out loud to him, caressing your knee while listening to your voice.
I see Choso as the kind of guy who would try to convince you he knew how to tell someone's future, “Oh really?” You asked, sarcasm in your tone as his hand held yours. “I swear I do-” he started, a smile already on his face as he looked up to the sky. It was late, two, maybe three am. Both of you had lost the want to sleep that night, Choso had asked you if you had noticed how bright the stars shined at night. Seeing as you were on the outskirts of Tokyo and high in the mountains, the stars shone so brightly. So close you felt like you could touch them if you reached your hand out to them. Laying on the grass as you looked over at him, the full moon gave you a clear look at his face. “Then tell me my future.” You said, turning to your side and holding your head up with your hand. He closed his eyes, And let out a ‘hmmm’ he let go of your hand, mirroring the way you laid, opening one eye to look at you. “You have to close your eyes too or it wont work.” He smiled, looking at you. Sighing as you closed your eyes, knowing he was just trying to be funny. “Alright now I can see.” He laughed, you exhaled sharply hearing his tone. His hand reached for yours again, guiding you to hold your hand flat against his, “Ohh i see. This makes sense.” He exaggerated. “Tell me.” you smiled, keeping your eyes closed. Choso opened his eyes to look at you. Admiring your features, taking in the image of you. He thought you looked so beautiful. The way you smiled, waiting for him to tell you the future. Practically melting at how your yes shut tight in anticipation, he smiled. Leaning over to kiss you, pulling away as he watched you open your eyes. You looked at him, eyes squinted, “I knew it.” you said, dropping your hand from his as he smiled at you. He turned to lay on his back, laying your head on his chest hearing his heartbeat quicken. His hand went to you back, holding you close as you closed your eyes. “The only thing I see when I think about my future is knowing it will be with you.” Choso whispered, his free hand behind his head as you rubbed your hand on his chest. 
I see Choso not liking horror movies, always dreading when you brought home a dvd from the 5 dollar section at the gas station. It wasn't because he was scared or anything (his words not mine) he just didn't like seeing the violent things people thought about to make a movie. Not understanding what cruel childhood the director must've had to think of such disgusting gore. Choso's hands clothing your arm, closing his eyes anytime he sensed a scary scene was coming. His body involuntarily jumped as a loud bang flashed on the screen. And everytime you laughed he'd say, “I was falling asleep- the noise surprised me.” Defending himself to you like he had to let you think he was strong. And after the movie was over and you'd be getting ready for bed, in the kitchen getting a glass of water. You'd say, “Did you hear that?” voice quiet and feigning fear. Seeing him flinch, shoulders stiff and turning around to stand in front of you, protecting you from any ghosts that dared step into the light. You couldn't hold in your laugh when you saw him get into his ‘fighting stance’ as he liked to call it, seeing him look back at you with a deadpan face. Taking a step forwards toward your bedroom. “Wait, don't leave the ghosts might get me!” you'd laugh, seeing his hand fwip up and down. “They can have you.” he mumbled, waiting for you at the doorway, secretly afraid of a ghost actually being there. Choso loves you always, even when you feel like complete garbage as the flu ate away at you. “Don't come near me- you'll get sick.” You'd say stuffy nose as he tried to hug you. “I don't care.” he’d reply, his hands wrapping around you as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. Spending the few days doting on you, holding you close while you shivered in his arms. Whispering to you "Gimme a kiss." before bed. Knowing he won’t go to sleep if you didn't grant him his wish. It didn't take long for Choso to catch it. But like he told you, he didn't care. As a matter of fact- he preferred being sick. It only gave you more reasons to stay at home with him, loving how you’d make him hot soup. How you'd scold him when he didn't take the flu medicine you had bought him. Choso didn't care, he liked knowing that the next morning you'd have to call into work to take care of him. Even long after it had passed, early in the mornings asking you to feel his forehead. That he doesn't feel too good. And you'd always check, pressing your hand to his forehead, “Cho, you feel fine.” you'd say, “Well my stomach hurts too-” he'd say, watching your hands grab your coat with pained eyes, seeing his eyes full of desperation. You placed a kiss on his lips, “I will be home soon.” you'd say through your teeth, seeing him pout in response. Always looking for a way to keep you home with him. 
I see Choso being jealous and possessive. Not in the way you’d think, more in a “I'm jealous of the wind that blows through your clothes.” kind of way. Possessive in the “I want you here with me till the sun rises in the west and sets in the east.” manner. I could never picture Choso willingly being toxic, a few pinkish flags but nothing that could ever really bother you. He was thrown into the new feelings of a different kind of love, so it was understandable when he would say something that was a thought straight from his head. Not bothering to think about it before telling you. But you always knew he meant his words, no matter how jumbled they were. When Choso had brought up how he could never forgive himself if he ever made you cry, you felt your heart strings pull at your chest. How he was so blessed to be with you. Loving him even when he was a mess. The kind of lover that draws you by candle light, telling you- “You look so beautiful- I have to show you.” his hands picking up a napkin and a stray pen from the living room coffee table. Drawing you slowly as you looked at him, thinking about how you were the blessed one to have such a perfect partner. Choso feared very few things, always making sure that you're safe in any situation. Didn't matter how small the danger risk was, you always came first. But what he feared most was your death, he had seen the movies about a perfect love that was shattered by the death of the other. While watching movies Choso liked picturing the two of you as the characters in his mind. Movies that were stupid romcoms, but he still watched them while daydreaming the couples were you and him. When you had brought up if he'd like to watch the John Wick movies, “They're just action movies about a guy who never dies.” You'd say as he nodded his head yes. After watching the first one he thought heavily of what he'd do if you were taken from him. What would become of him if you weren't here anymore. Choso’s heart clenched as he started breathing heavily. Turning over to see your back as you slept, fearing you had died in your sleep he pulled your arm so you'd flip to your back. Placing his ear to your chest, focusing on trying to hear your heartbeat as you slept. A relieved sigh leaving his lips at hearing your heart. Feeling the sudden weight on your chest, stirring awake as you squinted down at him. His eyes look up at you, whispering a small “Sorry.” Before pulling the shared blanket back on top of you. Laying on his side as you turned back around. His hands find their designated place around you, spooning you while you go back to sleep. 
Before you came into his life, Choso didn't have a home. He didn't have something to call home, even if he had a place to lay his head at night. Reading about how people consider their partners home. He didn't know what the feeling felt like till he was in your arms. The tingling feeling in his cheeks as you held onto him, thinking back to a poem he had read a while ago. He'd look up at you, “I get it now-” he'd say propping himself up on his forearms. Looking at his face that was lit up as though he had solved a puzzle he was putting together for years. Your eyes scanned his face in confusion as he jumped off of the bed and walked to the office of your apartment. Sitting up as you heard him rummaging through the drawers. Walking back to the bedroom with a smile on his face and a small book in hand. Fingers flipping through the pages in search of something. “It's the middle of the night-” you said, feeling him plop onto the bed, his eyes widening when he found what he was looking for. He cleared his throat, eyes on the text. “If I were to build a house, I'd have your arms as the walls,-” Choso read, eyes looking back up to you to make sure you were listening. “Your eyes as the windows, your smile as the front door, your heart as the fireplace.”  Toothy smile on his lips as he read the words to you. “And your soul as my light.” his voice shaking, watching your eyes tear up. “And in this house, I'd place my faith, knowing I'd finally found a home.” He finished, closing the pages and setting it down. Your eyes struggled to keep the tears at bay, eyebrows pinched together as his eyes looked to yours, small smile on his lips. “I read this before I met you-” he said, eyes sparkling even in the dim lighting. “And I finally understand it.” He confessed, placing his head back to your chest, his eyes shutting in content, feeling you held his face. “I finally know what a home feels like.” He mumbled to your skin, hand flat on your rib. Smile on your lips while a single tear fell down your cheek. Choso didn't think he was the greatest at explaining his feelings, relying on his actions instead. But when he would say small things like that, it would always make your heart warm. Knowing that there was someone in this world who truly loved you. Unconditionally and without restraint. Never feeling shame in telling you loved you, even if he had told you 10 times that day. 
I see Choso as the kind of person who says things without thinking of them first, but only with you. Often preferring silence with strangers. But when hes with you, he would blurt out the thoughts that had popped into his head while he listened to your ranting about your coworkers. Staring into your eyes, listening to the colorful string of words leave your lips. Heard in his pupils, chin in his hand, low eyes when you noticed his staring. He let a hum fall from his closed lips. “Marry me.” He hummed, eyes going wide hearing his own words leave his mouth before he could stop them. You smiled, relaxing your shoulders. Letting a small laugh fall from your lips seeing him start to stutter trying to save the conversation. Silence falling between you as you watched him realize he couldn't make you unhear his words. “I messed it up again, didn't I?” he asked, his hand on his forehead while he looked down. “Like when I messed it up when you told me you loved me-” He asked, looking up to see you smiling. Sighing, feeling embarrassment flush his cheeks. “It's okay.” You smiled, holding his hand and placing a kiss on his forehead. Feeling his stiff shoulders soften. "It's okay." You repeated, lacing your fingers with his as you soothed him.
-
a lil shorter than usual but I wanted to post this for anyone who was looking for Choso fluff, knowing that there isnt a whole lot of it on here🫠
519 notes · View notes
gabessquishytum · 1 month
Note
King Robert tends to sneak out of the castle a lot. His advisors and guards despair, trying to impress upon him the danger of the monarch just wandering around villages. They argue even beloved monarchs have enemies who might seek to hurt him while he's dallying about, outside the safety of the palace and his armed guards. The King nods and smiles......and continues to sneak out.
Hob, please don't call him "king" or "Robert," loves getting out of the castle! It's not like regular people really know what a king looks like, even if it's their monarch. When he's out Hob is amazed by his people.
Hob has helped raise a barn, brought in crops, been taught to knit by sweet old ladies, celebrated one of the pagan-ier holidays in a village square (the mead and food were fantastic), got into numerous sword fights to defend the honor of young ladies and men..... It's fantastic and real, and Hob would argue it makes him a better king.
Yes, Hob is aware that his various counselors (and his mom the Dowager Queen) want him to get married and stop venturing out, but all the stuck up potential consorts or soooo stuffy and entitled. Hob does think any of them have helped dig a well for a town that needed water or helped celebrate the birth of a new baby in a village pub!
Besides, there might be this beautiful new artist in town, Dream, who rents a room over the inn and takes simple commissions, who is so lovely. Hob is working so hard to be charming and learn more about him,,,but Dream is tight lipped as to where he's from. Still Hob knows he's wearing him down.....Hob got a small smile from his targeted buffoonery last time!
👑🤴🏽👑🤴🏽
Since they won't stop, Hob has decided he's going to see if he can convince Dream to marry him! Marrying him has to be better than those self serious "royals". But when he goes to see him, Dream is gone,, like he was never there. Hob is heartbroken.
He guesses he's meant to marry one of the snobs. He lets his council choose. They decide to accept the Endless Kingdom's offer - Prince Morpheus.
This is the romcom we ABSOLUTELY deserve with these two beloved idiots <3
Hob is disconsolate after Dream leaves - he doesn't even have the heart to sneak out of the castle. The villagers are quite worried about him until he finally turns up one evening, basically to say goodbye to all his friends. He explains that a spouse has finally been chosen for him, and that as a married man it will be inappropriate to go out gallivanting and putting himself in potential danger. He will have a duty to spend time with his new husband, too. And his friends all understand - they accept his heartfelt invitations to the wedding. He's brought gifts from the castle for all the kids who've basically adopted him as a big brother. And he definitely sheds a few tears in the arms of the old ladies before he leaves.
Meanwhile, Prince Morpheus is en route to his new spouse's kingdom. He doesn't want this marriage at all, but after he ran away (and then got caught and dragged back home) his parents forced him to accept to situation. They won't even tell him where he's going or who he's marrying - a punishment for his disgraceful behaviour! Dream is fully expecting to be married to some awful old man. But when he gets out of the carriage he finds himself in a rather familiar place... he almost laughs out loud! He quickly has to pretend to be heartbroken over the impending marriage, when he really he's nearly vibrating with excitement.
They don't meet until they get to the altar (it's tradition, for royal marriages). Hob’s eyes light up and he looks over towards where his village friends are sitting like "are you seeing this??? it’s dream!!!" Everyone else is quite confused about why King Robert suddenly looks so happy, but his friends are able to heartily applaud the marriage. He truly deserves to be happy!
As for Morpheus - or Dream, as he prefers to be called - with the wedding officially performed, he can throw himself into Hob’s arms. His parents are pissed off to see their wayward son looking so content, but Dream no longer cares. The fates have been kind to him, and delivered him into the arms of the only man he has ever wished to marry. He can't wait to spend many years sneaking out of the castle with Hob, getting up to all kinds of mischief, and finally enjoying life.
299 notes · View notes
normansnt · 3 months
Note
Could I request a third part of the prince? I love it!
YES OMG YOU ARE MY FIRST REQUEST HIIII THANK YOU SM IM HAPPY YOU LIKE IT🧡🧡
Yeah I might have forgot to mention I do in fact take requests😎
Actually ya'll have been loving the prince series and I was wondering if you want me to making it into like a full blown story like following the series events and what not, or like just a little series of cute scenarios?
Let me know.
Warnings:
The prince (part 3)
(Alastor x male reader)
Tumblr media
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Currently you were arguing with your father. Since the moment he found out you are dating Alastor he was not happy, to say the least.
"Why the sudden urge to leave? Is it not good here anymore because I can clean up the rubber ducks-"
"No dad thats not the point I just think I'm old enough to move out and Charlie has her hotel with a lot of rooms, and I mean I guess her dream is not that impossible-"
"Yeah right, like I'm going to believe that you just want to move in with that bambi of yours" he scoffed
"Dont call him- thats not- ok fine yeah, I want to move in with Alastor why is that such a problem I am a grown ass adult I can do as I please." And with that you left the room to pack.
--------------------------------------------------------------
"I swear, he still thinks I am a kid." You were pacing in Alastor's room while he was sitting on a couch and calmly drinking tea.
"He let Charlie go?? Why not me why cant I do what I want with my life" you continued your angry ranting while unpacking you clothes.
At this point you were basically moved in with Alastor. You had all your stuff there you just needed to unpack, which he solved with a flick of his wrist. You could have done that too, but your father raised both you and your sister to not be careless with the amount of power you have, also you were busy rambling.
"*sigh*...thank you honey." You said quietly as you took a seat next to him slumping into the couch.
Alastor looked at you. Till now he was just half listening to you ramble and he thought you would feel better once you let it out and you two could cuddle but right now you looked even more sad, defeated even.
This did not sit right with him. If there was anything he hated most was seeing you sad or hurt.
He took a hold of your hand and put his other one on your cheek to guide your head to look at him.
"My dear, this issue will be resolved just as any other, you will make up with your father." He reassured you with a smile.
"I know but than it will start again, and I'm starting to feel like he will never accept you even though you are so important to me and... it's just too much right now, I'm sorry I need to be alone." And with that you left.
There it was again. That stinging feeling in his chest. Alastor had to take matters into his own hands.
--------------------------------------------------------------
You walked down the stairs and took a seat by the bar.
"Damn kid, rough day?" Asked Husk as you put your head into your hands and groaned.
"Thats one way to put it, can you please get me a whisky on the rocks" you said in your ever so kind voice.
Husk liked you. On contrary to your father and older sister you were calm, quiet and well spoken. All this while still having the heart of gold they have as well.
He never understood how a charming young man such as yourself would find himself in a relationship with a demon like Alastor.
During your numerous visits to the Hotel you have talked to Husk a lot and you two became really good friends. The same went for Angel who usually joined you guys. You three usually sat by the bar chatting for hours.
"Hi (Y/N)," you heard Angels voice approaching as you sipped on your whisky. He took a seat next to you and shared a quick kiss with Husk. You chuckled to yourself quietly, you have been rooting for the two from the very beginning and when they finally got together you were so happy you shedded a few tears.
"Hi Angel" you gave him a small smile but he saw through it.
"Aww, toots hard times?" He asked as Husk handed him his drink.
"It's a long story" you answered.
"We got time" said Husk encouragingly.
You smiled a little than started telling the story.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Alastor was on his way to find Charlie. He needed to solve the situation or he had to gauge his own eyes out so he doesn't have to see you sad.
He figured if he got your father to come to the hotel you can talk things out. As well as, he is going to try and make an effort not to be a complete ass with him but Lucifer has to try and be nice as well, for your sake.
He needed Charlie for this because if Alastor asked Lucifer to come he would not. However if Charlie asked, he'd be there in a second.
"Oh Charlie?" He wondered into the princess's room.
"Yes? OH Alastor HI how is my brother doing?" She asked with excitement. She was more than thrilled that her little brother is going to move into her hotel.
"Not so well I'm afraid I acquire your assistance to make him feel better"
"What? Whats the problem is he ok? Did you hurt him? Alastor I do not care how helpful you are around here if you hurt my little brother-" Her eyes started glowing red as her hair was swept into the air and her horns started to show.
Before this could go any further Alastor cut her off.
"My dear, rest assured I would kill hell's entire population and my self before causing any harm to your darling brother." He said calmly.
"Oh, then whats the problem?" Asked Charlie now calm.
And so Alastor explained everything to Charlie.
When Alastor and Charlie knocked on her father's door there was no answer. They looked at one another and Charlie checked if it was open. It was, so they could go in without problems.
"Hello? Dad?" Yelled Charlie as her voice echoed in the huge mansion.
"YOU, It's your fault you took them away from me" they heard as they looked to their right.
In seconds Alastor was tackled to the floor with a very angry Lucifer on top.
When Charlie registered what she was seeing she started to pull her father off of the Radio demon to almost no avail. The devil wouldn't budge.
"YOU TOOK BOTH OF MY CHILDREN AWAY FROM ME ARE YOU HAPPY NOW IS THAT ENOUGH?"
Lucifer was not happy. He was yelling in his demon form wings out and fire spewing from his mouth.
"DAD"
Everyone stopped. You were standing in the door looking at the scene before you, baffled.
You rarely raised your voice, so to hear it this loud and clear shocked most people in the room.
You cleared your throat. And said in your normal calm voice again.
"Can we talk in private."
Lucifer calmed down and followed you into the room you left to.
When he entered the room to his surprise, you hugged him.
"Listen dad, I understand that both of your kids growing up is hard for you, and I'm sorry for leaving you alone but I need my space I'm starting to live my life and its with Alastor because I love him."
You said in a very gentle tone.
Your dad looked at you for some time then hugged you again.
"You really love him, kiddo?" He looked at you with understanding eyes as he let go.
"I do, dad I really do." You answered.
Your dad sighed. He took a hold of your hands.
"All that matters to me is that you are happy. I'm sorry I have been such a jerk about it but...it's so hard to let you kids go, you will always be my babies" He sniffed lightly.
You chuckled at that and squeezed his hands.
"Can you please make an effort to not hate Alastor?" You tried.
He groaned.
"Yeah, yeah I'll see what I can do but he needs to be cooperative"
You walked out of the room.
Charlie stood up with tears in her eyes and hugged you both.
"Oh...the walls are thin here aren't they?" You asked as you looked at your dad.
"Yeaaah, forgot to mention that."
"You guys, I'm so happy you made up are we ok now?" She asked between sniffles.
"Yeah, we are ok" you smiled at your dad.
After your sister let you go from her crushing embrace Alastor walked up to you.
"I- listen no pressure about saying-" he cut you off by swapping you off your feet into a breathtaking kiss.
"I...I love you too, darling" he said quietly, without the radio statics, he said it in his real voice, as he put his forehead on yours.
"OK, see, I promised to be nice but there is no need to rub it in my face" your father said as he dragged you away.
Alastor straightened up and, with the static back in his voice and an eye twitching, he held his hand out to your father.
"I promise to make an effort to not murder you" he smiled eerily at your dad.
Lucifer had a brooding expression on his face but shook the radio demons hand none the less.
"Thank you." You said at last as you hugged both of them. They hugged you back. While glaring at each other behind your back.
Sure they are gonna make an effort. When you're looking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TADA
I really hope you like it again thank you for the request.
Also please let me know if y'all want any of what I mentioned in the beginning.
When Alastor's staff broke and he started talking w/o the statics I was ON MY KNEES.
I WANNA THANK EVERY SINGLE ON OF YOU WHO LIKE MY STORIES THEY HAVE RECEIVED A LOT OF LOVE AND IM THANKFUL BEYOND IMAGINATION THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU💗💗
OK LOVE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY/NIGHT/MORNING WHATEVER MWUAH💋
299 notes · View notes
coco-loco-nut · 15 days
Text
Down Bad
pairing: carlos sainz x reader
summary: a heartbreak like no other
a/n: it’s super short, sorry
masterlist ttpd masterlist
________
You should've known better. Really. You aren't the kind of girl that a hot, 29-year-old, Spanish Formula One driver would like. Of course, you are beautiful, but apparently not enough for him. His attention was fleeting, leaving you just another one of his conquests in a long string of girls like you.
You met Carlos while interning in Madrid during the Winter. At the time you didn't realize he was love-bombing you, only to drop you cold once your internship ended a month later and you went home, practically shipped away by him. For a moment you knew, or thought you knew, extraordinary love, but it wasn't real. Was anything real anymore?
“Sweetheart, you need to stop moping,” your mom says from the doorway of your bedroom. “You know I love you, but if I didn’t know you better, I’d think you are a moody teenager,” you know your mom means well, but the last bit struck hard.
“Fine, I’m going for a run,” you groan, rolling out of bed. She leaves your room, seemingly appeased. It doesn’t take you long to get dressed, lace up your trainers, and play your angsty playlist through your headphones.
You take the path you know by heart, the one you take when you need to be away from people. When you are sufficiently alone, you let it all out.
Crying and running may not be the wisest idea, but it’s cathartic to you. You stop when you get to the meadow and lay down, staring at the cloudy sky. As the music plays, you yell the lines that hit too close to home. I might just die, it would make no difference. Fuck you if I can’t have us.
Fuck. You need to get over him. Everything just feels so hollow now, like you were stripped of everything you are and ever were. You just want to talk to your friends about it, but you know them. They will call you nuts, saying that it never really happened, that Carlos Sainz would never date you.
So instead, you lay in this field, thinking about when you were heaven struck. You might just not get up, stay down while you are down bad for someone who doesn’t even care about your existence anymore.
Maybe you were abducted by an alien to another, then returned back to this spot. That could explain it. Explain why you are feeling the angst of a scorned teenage girl, when you have more emotional maturity than that. You are 22 after all.
It’s how you imagine it feels like to lose the touch of a twin flame. I guess being love bombed then abandoned would do that to you.
The more you think about it, the more the alien analogy seems to fit. It’s like he beamed down from a ship, did a hostile takeover on your heart, the alien encounters closer and closed as each day passed. And you let them happen, willingly.
It started with a hello, then coffee, then a stroll, then a lunch, then a drive, then a dinner, then a night spent together, two, three, four, it spiraled. He did everything he could to worm his way into your heart, only for him to say it’s over.
Maybe you will take the ship, go to some planet and find an alien who can understand all of it. How dare he do everything he could to make you fall in love, only to leave you stranded. How is that romantic? You were in love, and fuck him if you can’t have him because of his actions.
You stare at the sky, music pumping through your headphones, willing the sky to part and reveal the alien spaceship that will beam you up to it in a cloud of dust and take you away.
Minutes pass until you realize your efforts are worthless, you mentally wave goodbye to the ship that carries him (and his pet names and his perfect dates) with it. Shedding a few tears on your run home, you start rebuilding yourself with each step. The hurt and pain slowly being chipped away.
No man with EVER make you feel this down bad again.
180 notes · View notes
ellieluvr420 · 3 months
Text
Friends? Never. Pt.8 (Ellie Williams x reader)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
SYNOPSIS: You and Ellie had been bitter enemies for years now but before that you were best friends. You had always planned to be roommates one day but when that becomes a reality the situation isn't exactly how you both imagined it.
SMUT mdni! please accept this as my sincere apology for the last chapter :D
"Ellie!" You call out to no response again. You had woken with puffy eyes and a blocked nose from the tears you had shed last night but nothing compared to the sinking feeling you were faced with as you realised Ellie had already woken up and left before you. It was nine AM; Ellie only woke up before eleven when she had to. She had to get away from you. You sank to the floor and just sat there unsure of what to do next while the silence of the house mocked you for your actions last night. Your head was pounding and as you walked over to the mirror to look at your dishevelled appearance you noticed the prominent bump on your forehead that was accompanied by a black and blue bruise that stretched over two-thirds of your forehead and crept down towards your eye. You weren't sure if it was the hangover or the head-butt that was the source of the pain but either way it was making your vision blur around the edges. As you watched yourself in the mirror you grew more and more angry at yourself until your reflection was no longer your reflection, or maybe it was, and you were actually seeing yourself for what you were because staring right back at you was a monster with horns and a forked tongue that was poking out of your lips. You stared back in horror as your reflection laughed at you until the sight made you sick to your stomach and you yanked the mirror off the wall, slamming it into the ground and watching it shatter into a million tiny pieces. 
As the mirror shattered you had a moment of clarity that sent you running to your room to throw on the first bottoms you could find so you could run out the door to go find Ellie. You couldn’t stay at home when she’s not there, not when things between you were like this. You started at a run but then the dizziness took over and you had to slow to a brisk walk until eventually that was too much for you and you had to stop as you held on to the post of a street sign to keep yourself upright. You make a mental note to go to the infirmary later but that would have to wait, finding Ellie was your first and only priority. You continue staggering towards the town centre and as you see the bustle of people milling about you sigh from relief that you’re almost there. You hadn’t considered the possibility that she wasn’t in town until you actually got there which only made you hate yourself more. You swallow the bile that had been trying to force its way from your stomach since you first got dizzy and push on to start looking around the town centre. 
Everything looks normal, and no one looks like Ellie so as you begin to lose hope and consider you might have to wait for her to come to you, you hear a crash followed by yelling. You follow the commotion to a large crowd of people that you curse knowing you had to force your way through. You squint your eyes to make your vision focus better as you start manoeuvring yourself past people until you reach the front of the group. 
“You fucking cunt! I’ll fucking kill you for what you did to her!” You recognise Ellie’s voice before your vision focuses on her figure that was kneeling over a considerably bigger body that was unmoving on the floor. You immediately stagger forward squinting your eyes more until they focus on the person underneath her. You recognise him but his face is too blurry to fully make out, you only realise it’s your dad that’s underneath her when you hear your mum scream your name as well as a: “Do something!” 
“For fuck’s sake.” You mutter under your breath as you try to ignore the growing throbbing in your head and the ringing in your ears, you reach Ellie after what feels like miles although it was likely only 10 steps but the only thing you have the strength to do is squeeze her shoulder with one hand. 
“Ellie, please... stop.” You wheeze out at her. She snaps her head in your direction, and you just about make out how her face changes from rage to worry. Her lips are moving but there’s no sound coming out, all you can hear is a high-pitched ringing that had increased in volume from a quiet sound in the back of your mind to a debilitating, piercing ring that disoriented you enough that you don’t realise you’re collapsing until your back hits the ground and all you can see is blue. You watch the sky, and your eyes follow a bird that flies over your eye-line before everything goes black and the ringing finally subsides. 
You can hear your name being called, faintly, as if from a distance, you recognise the voice, but you can’t associate it with anyone you know. Nevertheless, you follow the voice, it’s too enticing not to. You follow it until it’s booming around your head as a bright light blinds you. 
Ellie watched as your eyes twitched and began to flicker open, she watches as they widen with panic, and she immediately jumps up so you can see her. 
“Hi, it’s okay, don’t panic. You’re okay. Take a deep breath in, can you do that?” Her voice sounds strained and shaky and as your vision focuses you notice the glassy shine over her bloodshot eyes. 
“Ow.” Was all you could muster up but that two letter word, or sound even, was enough to make Ellie erupt into laughter filled with relief. 
“Oh my god, you’re okay. You’re okay, oh thank fuck.” She scoops your upper half into her arms to pull you into a tight embrace as if you’ll disappear if she lets go. “I was so worried. I’m so sorry about last night.” 
“I’m sorry, do I know you?” Your confused tone has her immediately loosening her grip to look down at you in horror, until you smile and start giggling. 
“Oh, you are so not funny. That’s fucking horrible.” 
“I know, I’m sorry but I had to.” 
“You’re a fucking psycho.” 
“Yeah, yeah. What the fuck actually just happened though? The last thing I remember is... Oh my god. Why the fuck were you beating up my dad?” 
“Oh, so you can remember that?” 
“Don’t avoid the question.” She huffs. 
“Fine. I was just talking to Dina, we ran into each other and then he comes out of nowhere and shoves me and starts screaming about how I’ve ruined you with my demonic ways and I don’t know, I guess I just lost it.” 
“So, you beat up my dad?” 
“Yeah... He’s actually in the next room over right now.” You suddenly notice you’re in the infirmary. 
“What happened after I walked up to you?” 
“I don’t know, I just turned around and you looked so ill and then you just collapsed.” 
“That explains the dizziness.” 
“What?” 
“When I was coming to find you, I started getting really dizzy and my ears were ringing, and I felt really sick.” 
“And you didn’t go home?” Her tone is laced with shock and frustration as she looks down at you like you’re clinically insane. 
“You weren’t at home. Ellie I’m so, so, so sorry. I was drunk, but that’s not an excuse, and when I saw them standing there staring at us I just- I don’t know why I did it, but it was a horrible thing to do and I’m a horrible person for it. I’m so-” Your eyes start to water as you recall last night and how hurt she had looked but she’s quick to shush you and wipe away the stray tear that had fled your eye. 
“It’s okay.” 
“It’s NOT.” You raise your voice and immediately wince and grab at your head.  
“You need to take it easy. Sasha thinks you got a concussion, but the adrenaline stopped you from passing out and that’s why you collapsed which means you’re on bedrest.” 
“No. No way.” 
“Doctor’s orders.” 
“No, I’m not fucking staying here when he’s in the room next door. Ellie take me home, now.” She looks at you, then at the door, then back at you and sighs before shuffling out from under you and placing you down gently to go peak out into the hallway. She watches for a moment then rushes back to you and scoops you into her arms, bridal style. 
“Fine but I’m gonna have to sneak you out of here or Sasha will have my head.” 
“Thank you, Ellie.” 
“Can’t believe the shit I do for you.” You giggle and nestle into her as she creeps through the halls of the infirmary until you burst through the doors, she keeps walking until you’re out of sight of the building. As you hear a hushed wince from Ellie you realise she’s carrying you despite still recovering from her injuries. Neither of you were in the best shape at the moment so you started to wiggle in her arms in attempt to get her to drop you. “Stop fucking moving or I’m gonna drop you.” 
“Put me down.” 
“No.” 
“I can hear you wincing. Put me down, we’re not that far you can just help me walk the rest of the way.” She stops and sighs before looking you dead in the eyes with a stern look on her face. 
“The second you start to feel dizzy; you tell me. Got it?” 
“Aye aye captain.” You comically salute her and she rolls her eyes before placing you on your feet gently and immediately wrapping an arm around your waist and placing yours round her shoulder.  
“You ready?” 
“Yeah, let’s do it.” At your command she starts walking slowly as she practically drags you along. You’re maybe fifty steps from your home when the dizziness begins again, you stop dead in your tracks and blink rapidly to try and clear the haze in your vision but before you can protest Ellie is already scooping you back up again to carry you for the last stretch of the trek home. She fumbles with the doorknob and kicks the door open which you have to suppress a whine at before she carries you straight to the sofa where she places you down so gently you feel like you’re made of glass. 
“Wanna tell me what happened to the mirror in the hallway?” 
“There was a monster in it.”  
“Keep talking like that and I’m dragging your ass straight back to Sasha.” 
“Okay, okay, jeez.” She sits at the other end of the sofa placing your legs over her lap as she rubs at your calves while observing your state. 
“So, when you looked in the mirror this morning and you saw a bump the size of a golf ball and a bruise covering basically your whole forehead, you didn’t think a stop to the infirmary would be a good idea?” 
“I did but I needed to find you first.” 
“For fuck’s sake.” 
“I’m so-” 
“If you apologise again, I’m gonna spray you with the hose.” 
“What hose?” 
“I don’t know that was just something Joel always said to me when I was getting on his nerves.” She chuckles and you giggle quietly. She looks at you and you can see the sadness in her eyes. “I think I’m going to have to kill your dad by the way.” You snort. 
“Be my guest. How long did Sasha say I’m on bedrest for?” 
“At least 24 hours.” 
“What time did I pass out?” 
“Twenty-four hours starting now.” You groan and kick your legs in her lap which only makes her laugh more. 
“My turn to torture you now.” 
“I can’t believe you’re still calling me taking care of you torture, I should’ve just let you suffer.” 
“But you wouldn’t. It’s my turn to return the favour.” She smiles mockingly at you as you scowl at her. 
The day went by painfully slowly despite enjoying Ellie’s company more than you could explain. You hated her coddling you but appreciated it nonetheless and when you finally managed to convince Ellie to go to sleep in her bed and not on the floor next to you on the sofa, you felt like you finally had a victory. You knew what you were planning to do was a bad idea, but you couldn’t rest until it was done so you dragged yourself up off the sofa and grabbed your shoes before slipping out the door into the cool night air.  
You felt better than you did when you left the house that morning, but you still didn’t feel completely fine, so you took it slow as you made your way back to the infirmary. Sasha was never there overnight unless she was called in, so you didn’t have to worry about facing her wrath as you crept through the halls to your destination. As you inch open the door to the room Ellie had said your dad was in, you’re disappointed to see it empty but at least you knew where to go next. 
As you approached the house that no longer felt like home your body went cold and you had to pause for a second to contemplate if this was a good idea. It wasn’t, but that didn’t stop you as you stormed up the steps to the front door and started hammering at it until your fist felt bruised and you heard grumbling and shuffling from inside. 
“What the fu-“ Your father is battered and bruised and the sight causes a sick smile to appear on your face. “What do you want?” You don’t answer him, simply pushing past him and walking into the living room.  
“Go get mom up.” 
“No, she’s sleeping.” You rush towards him until you’re inches away from his puffy face. 
“Go get her up or so help me god I’ll finish what Ellie started.” You spat out as if the words were poisonous, his face changed from a scowl to what you could only describe as pained as he staggers off to go get your mother. You pace and try to think of something to say when they both get downstairs as you hadn’t had time to think that far ahead but there are no words coming to mind. As the regret starts to set in, they both walk into the living room with equally puzzled looks on their tired faces.  
“So, finally seen that girl for what she is and want to take us up on our offer?” You laugh, cackle, at him and the absurdity of his statement before the rage takes over and you go quiet.  
“My whole childhood was so happy. I loved you both more than anything, you were my everything. Do you know how rare it is for a family to have both parents and all children alive? Do you realise how fucking lucky you were? No you obviously don’t because you threw it all away because of who I love.” 
“That lifestyle is a sin.” 
“Oh my god do you hear yourself? Do you not think abandoning your child after physically throwing them out of your house isn’t a sin?” 
“Honey you have to understand-“ 
“NO Mom, I don’t have to understand because you’re fucking wrong. It took me a long time to realise this but you’re wrong, not me!”  
“See look what she’s done to you. You never would’ve yelled at your mother like that before. You’re not even you anymore.” His words stop your pacing as you turn to face him and walk over to them to close the distance. 
“YOU DID THIS TO ME! SHE FUCKING FIXED ME. YOU STAY AWAY FROM BOTH OF US OR I WILL HAVE YOU BOTH THROWN OUT OF JACKSON. BELIEVE ME, MARIA WAS READY TO CHUCK YOU OUT WHEN YOU BOTH KICKED ME OUT BUT I STOPPED HER SO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME AND ELLIE AND IF I EVER SEE YOUR FUCKING FACES AGAIN, YOU’LL FUCKING REGRET IT.” You don’t wait for a response before storming out of the house that once caused you the most pain you’ve felt in your entire life and as you turn back one last time, the sight of it only exhilarates you as you rush back to home, to Ellie. 
“Ellie wake up!” You gently shake Ellie as you whisper at her in an attempt to not scare her, but she still jumps a little as she wakes regardless. 
“What are you doing? You’re supposed to be on bed rest?” 
“Okay well shuffle up and let me in bed then.” She sighs and rolls from her front to her side to face you as you climb into the space she had just freed up for you. “Hi.” 
“Hey, why did you get up?” 
“It’s cold downstairs, you’re warm.” She nods once with a suspicious look on her face before holding her arm up for you to nestle into her and then puts her arm tightly around you. You sigh into her and then the memory of your confrontation with your parents flashes into your mind again. You hadn’t come to her bed to cuddle and now you were on a mission. You crane your neck up to press feathery kisses up and down her neck, her hand laces itself into your hair and tugs gently as she groans softly. You transition from sweet pecks over her neck to open-mouthed kisses as you suck a trail of bruises from her jaw to her collarbones, her hand in your hair tugs harder as her breathing quickens. You take this is as your sign to gently push her down flat on the bed as you lean over her, never once stopping your attack. 
“Wh- What are you doing?” 
“Think it's pretty obvious what I’m doing Ellie.” You whisper into her ear, she shudders as your breath tickles but as you nip at her earlobe she gasps and meets your hungry eyes. 
“You need to rest.” 
“I’m fine, if you want me to stop tell me you don’t want this.” She stares back at you with her mouth agape, she knows the right thing to do would be to make you rest but all she can focus on is the throbbing between her legs and the heat creeping up her entire body. She lunges forward connecting your lips together in a soft but passionate kiss as your tongues immediately start swirling around each other’s, her arms wrap around your waist as you straddle her hips and without a second thought you begin grinding down onto her to relieve some of the thrumming pain you had been feeling in your heat ever since you walked through the front door. Ellie’s hands move down to your hips to squeeze and guide your movements, she feels entirely lost in you, she can barely keep hold of reality when she feels your hand snake down and palm her through the checkered boxers she always wore to bed. “So wet already El, bet if I look there’s gonna be a little wet patch.” You smirk at her as you watch her cheeks flush an even deeper shade of crimson as she struggles to maintain eye contact. This is such a stark contrast to the Ellie you had seen last night, and you were grateful, this is the Ellie you adore.  
“Shut up.” She breathes out as you quirk an eyebrow at her before sitting up in her lap, she tries to follow you upwards, but you firmly push her back down to the bed as you revel in the control you had over her at this moment. You felt powerful, you felt powerful as you left your parents and now looking down at Ellie’s flustered face the feeling only intensifies. You shuffle down her body until you’re between her legs inspecting the obvious wet patch you knew would be there. The boxers she’s wearing tonight are white and light blue checked so the dark patch is all the more obvious, you meet her needy eyes as you press a light kiss to her clit through her boxers and as you see the almost-mute gasp leave her lips, you lick a stripe up her slit and lean back to gaze at the defined curves of her biceps, you can see the definition of her abs through her white tank top and as your eyes trail upwards you notice the stiffened peaks of her nipples. You lurch forward and attach your mouth to her right nipple as your index finger circles the left one painfully slowly. You hear a high-pitched whine leave her lips and her hands brush your chest as they reach for the bottom of her tank top before she yanks it over her head, throwing it on the floor to join the growing pile of clothes scattered around her room. Her hands entwine round the back of your head as she pulls you back down to her chest, but you grab her cheeks and squish them together just slightly. 
“Tell me what you want.” 
“You.” Her voice is hypnotising, and it almost makes you forget the game you were playing with her, like a predator playing with their prey before they devour them. 
“Mmm gotta be more specific than that babe.” She huffs and removes a hand from your head to shield her eyes from looking at you but that ruins the fun so you gently pry it away and peck her nose. “Don’t hide, you’re so perfect, let me see you.” 
“Please.” She whines and you almost give in, you’re so close but you just can’t, you need this. 
“Not good enough Ellie.” You purr at her with a twisted smile at her suffering. 
“Fuck- please babe, please fuck me.” Hearing the same words leave her lips that she made you say last night sends a rush of ecstasy through you as you immediately dive back to her chest and latch onto her left nipple this time as you roll the other between your fingers before pinching as you bite down gently. She hisses and reflexively bucks her hips up into you trying to signal where she needs you the most.  
“Aw so needy... and so sensitive. Imagine if everyone saw how you were with me, saw how whiny you are hm.” Your teasing sends bolts of electricity to her core as she squeezes her thighs together in an attempt to sooth the aching between her legs that had grown painful. You feel the shuffle of her thighs behind you and decide to finally move back down between her legs again to look at the dark patch that had already doubled in size, you inch her boxers down her legs tortuously slow and as you follow the fluffy, auburn hairs of her happy trail down to her heat the sight sends shivers through you. She was well-kept but the hair that did decorate her mound only made her more attractive to you. You meet her eyes and smile at the vulnerable expression painting her features as you massage at her thigh. “You are so, so beautiful Ellie.” You suck her clit into your mouth before waiting for a response and the groan she let out was the most rewarding sound you had ever heard. 
As you swirl your tongue over her bud, her hand grips onto your hair again as she begins grinding herself down onto your tongue, you flatten it and watch in awe at the way her face contorts and screws up with pleasure. You prod a finger at her hole and the groan she lets out tells you to keep going.  
“Please I need more.” She whines out, shocking both you and her. 
“Mm so greedy.” You coo before inserting your ring finger to join your middle finger as you massage at her sweet spot. Your tongue goes back to her bud and she rides your face like the world is ending until her thighs start to tremble and clamp down on your head. She finishes with a pornographic moan as all the tension in her body releases and she goes limp underneath you. You suck at her clit gently as you slowly remove her fingers as she hisses at the over stimulation. You pull away and leave a chaste kiss on her clit before leaning back to sit on your knees as you stare into her soul while you lick your fingers clean. She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth and chews on it at the sight before you lean down and kiss her sloppier than you ever had before so she can taste herself on your tongue. She groans into your mouth and you pull away with a smile. “You taste so good babe.” 
“Shut up.” She groans as she pulls you back in to kiss you once again. As you both pull away panting and eyeing each other, you shake your head gently at her. 
“You are awful at taking compliments.” 
“I know.” She rubs at your waist as you both bask in the afterglow before you see a flash of excitement grace her face. “Lay down.” You don’t question her, simply climbing off her and laying in her place on your back as she wastes no time in gently removing the clothes you criminally still had on. She kisses from your collarbones all the way down to your stomach before straddling your thigh as she did the other night. “Gonna do it right this time.” You barely have a second to process what she means before she rolls her hips into yours.  
“Ugh fuck, just like that El.” She continues her movements but speeds up her pace never once going softer on you. You were already so pent up from tonight and last night that the knot in your stomach begins to tighten embarrassingly fast. 
“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m sorry for how I was with you last night.” She says through heavy breaths and despite the fact that you hated that she was apologising for being rightly mad at you, your heart still swells at her words. 
Before you can reply, your orgasm hits you like lightning was electrifying your whole body as you toes curled and your eyes rolled back in your head. You let out a choked moan as every muscle in your body tenses and she guides you through your release before slowing down to a stop as she collapses on top of you, your legs still entwined with each other's. She peppers kisses over your chest and neck as you scratch her scalp which sends a shiver down her spine.  
“Can I stay in the bed this time?” You laugh as she eyes you with a displeased look at your teasing. 
“You’re staying in this bed whether you like it or not.” She smiles as she rests her head on your chest and listens to the steady rhythm of your heart beat. 
“Good.” You both stay wrapped in each other’s arms as the synchronised sound of your breaths and Ellie’s weight on you lulls you into a deep sleep that you hadn’t realised you so desperately needed. 
tags: @emiliabby @readbydayana @radioheadfan699
249 notes · View notes
ilypaigebuckets · 7 days
Text
Dating Kate Martin Headcannons!
little head cannon post bc i have so little written for kate! sorry i haven’t been active ive just been so busy but im otw to the lizzy mcalpine concert sorry just doxxed myself maybe?? idk but yay so fun but yeah im not busy after tn like no plans whatsoever 🥳
- kate definitely fell first
- i don’t think she’d be like ACTIVELY looking for a partner i think she just saw you and was like “yep i want that one” but was too scared to actually pursue you
- caitlin definitely had to hype her up to ask you out on a first date
- your guys’ first date is definitely something cozy and personable like a little coffee shop or cafe. even though it’s simple, kate would be so nervous. you guys spend the time together getting to know each other and for your second date you invite her over to your apartment that evening to watch a movie and have dinner
- she definitely kisses you on the second date bc she’s such a uhaul and already knows you’re gonna be special to her
- her love languages are definitely physical touch and quality time, and words of affirmation too!!
- she loves having full on cuddle sessions with you in the mornings, before bed, even in the middle of the afternoon when you guys have a spare moment to kill. she’s the self proclaimed queen of cuddles and always tries to scoop you up into her lap whenever she gets the chance.
- kate always wants to be touching you, no matter where you are. even in public, she’ll be hugging you from behind or holding your hand. her teammates have definitely had to tell her to cool it with the pda once or twice because she’s so enticed by you she totally forgets about everyone else around you two.
- kate’s always making time for you. even if you guys are just studying for your classes in silence or she meets up with you to walk you to your lecture, she enjoys it because it’s with you.
- she wants you to come to all of her games. one time you missed one of her away games due to a family get together and she was really upset by it. she wasn’t mad at you or anything, but she was definitely pouting about how much she missed you.
- kate is such a sweetheart to you. if you’re feeling down about yourself, best believe she will be able to tell!! she writes sweet sayings and positive affirmations on little sticky notes and puts them up on your refrigerator and bathroom mirror for you to look at.
- she loves taking care of you, to her you’re her little baby. if you’ve had a tough week, she’ll lay down with you to take a nap and after you fall asleep she’ll get up and tidy your room up a bit. you wake up feeling so grateful for her but she assures you that she’s just a neat freak and it was her pleasure to
- she’s a super patient, and i think she’d definitely find that attractive in you so i don’t think you guys would have too many fights.
- most of your fights are probably driven by jealousy on either side. kate loves you so much and she sometimes gets paranoid your eyes will wander somewhere else. you love kate just as much, and all of the fans writing flirty comments to her definitely makes you insecure from time to time.
- when you fight, you and kate never yell at each other. you’re more passionate, while she’s more calm and collected so you might shed a few tears trying to prove a point. once she sees that you’re crying, though, it’s game over and she squashes the entire thing and rushes over to hold you in her arms. she hates seeing you upset, and she hates even more that it’s partly because of her.
- kate definitely loves attention and gets annoyed/slightly jealous when you talk to her teammates over her
- “i just don’t understand why you were talking to caitlin for SO LONG y/n. do you think she’s cooler than me?” and she shows her little puppy dog eyes and pouts her lip at you and you almost fall for it
- nicknames: for kate, you definitely call her love, lovebug, baby, sweet little names like that. kate calls you baby, princess and have you guys seen her tattoo that says sunshine? she would definitely call you her sunshine too (i have a fic idea for this so lmk if you want me to write itttt)
153 notes · View notes
wonton4rang · 9 days
Text
Tumblr media
Kiss and make up ¡!
pairing: bnd legal line x gn!reader
warnings: smut +18, some toxic behaviour (ig idek atp), cursing, unprotected sex (be safe y'all 😔) and I think that's about it, lmk if I missed anything.
genre: smut. ♡
summary: how would be make up sex with boynextdoor members (legal line - everyone but woonhak)
note: I was going to post an ask I got ready for today but tumblr kinda glitched and it delete half of it so I need to re-write and edit it again :'( please enjoy this as an apology <3
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sungho; make up sex with him can be overwhelming, and it most likely will, there could be two reasons for it: he is sooooo sorry for everything that he keeps whispering little "sorry, baby" into your ear or he's still kinda mad and just fucks you out of despair. either one you will feel so good and full that you will forgive him for anything you got mad for in the first place. it was sungho and his strong body and gifted cock against you, tbh who would go against that? his pretty foxy eyes looking down on you with so much appreciation, his lips glossy due to your own saliva and his hair sticking to his forehead due to the sweat. he was so hot and it was just a small disagreement anyways, nothing you guys couldn't talk about after you were stuffed full like a pillow.
riwoo; i see him into some dynamic type of sex, nothing crazy but something that would consume lots of energy, like fucking you in some odd yet pleasant position with no rest, your knees numb and your arms trembling, but when it's make up sex he would be the sweetest and most cliche person, laying you on your back and caressing your cheeks while he left a trail of kisses all over your face, neck and your collarbone, mumbling how pretty you were and how much he hated to fight with you. he's just so sweet and good for you :(( you guys definitely talk about things and get to a solution together, it might be even faster than with other members since i feel like riwoo will understand and make his point clear so that it can be solved accordingly and fast.
jaehyun; he's crying. but not like a few tears shed, he's crying his eyes out whenever you guys have an argument about anything and everything and he really doesn't wanna see you afterwards because he feels so wronged. but when you knock on the door of your shared bedroom after giving him some space, he would make a light pout, looking away so you can know that he's still mad. it only took you two minutes of "baby, I'm sorry, it was not my intention to yell at you. It's not your fault that I'm stressed and I'm sorry I let it out on you, can you please forgive me?" and he will, cause jaehyun is like a little puppy to you, he would never say no, better yet, his answer was "i forgive you, y/n, how 'bout I help you getting rid of that stress, hm?" and then he made you come around his cock twice, giving you a third orgasm while eating you out and softly giggling at your wasted look, kissing you before helping you get a relaxing bath and then tuck you in bed.
taesan; I think I've said this before but I don't see him as a highly sex-drived person, not really understanding all the hype about it, yes, it was good and he loved to fuck you and make love to you, but it was not his top priority. yet I do believe he has his triggers. so when you guys got into this heated argument he realized something: he found your angry self very appealing, the way you yelled at him and pushed his chest making him grin a little bit at the fact that he could tower you and stop you in any moment but you felt that you controlled him. the whole discussion was about some girl that held his arm earlier and he did not move her, you were furious cause you knew how much he hated physical contact with most people and letting that random girl do it like that? you raged. "is this funny to you?" you said, getting him back from his thoughts. "she's no one, love, but I can show you why you are mine right now" you were confused, not following his words are they were so out of place. "you're so hot when you get cold" was the last thing he said before taking you into a deep kiss that ended up with you crying out his name while he made love slowly to you, pounding your cunt full while his soft and wet lips kissed your face. taesan was yours, all yours, no else mattered to him, he did not have any interest in other girls. it was you, you were his one and only.
leehan; where do I even start? he would listen to everything you have to say, quietly nodding to the points you're making and chewing his cheek to avoid saying anything stupid that would interrupt your failed version of an apology, because right now all he can think about is the away your boobs wiggle under your loose large tshirt with every move that your hands do, your tights looking so pretty that he couldn't avoid staring and you noticed, snapping your fingers in his face and rolling your eyes when he just smirked at you, throwing his hair back and sitting comfortably in the couch before spreading his legs a little bit. "if you're so sorry you could show me with actions, y/n" he was so cocky that you couldn't even be mad at him, straddling in his lap and moving your panties aside when he took his dick out and aligned it with your soaked entrance. "you're going to fuck me so good, aren't you, baby?" a soft kiss was pressed in your lips and he leaned back to let you ride the shit out of him. the so called argument long gone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hope you guys enjoyed!! <33
192 notes · View notes
starjxsung · 27 days
Note
okayyy i guess i will make the first request !!! :3 what do you think jealous sex with skz would be like ? the type of sex where they're so jealous and frustrated by something (or someone), they need to fuck their frustration into you
giggles and runs away
-🦢
Chan: quiet at first about why he’s frustrated or jealous tbh. sorta just makes it obvious that he’s horny (I lowk feel like he would get horny as a result of being frustrated or mad??), fucks his anger out on you and it’s v sloppy, not rushed per se but closer to a quickie even though he can still go a few rounds. Lots of heavy grunting and he’s not trying to be quiet at all. And only after he’s finished and you’re in bed beside him catching your breath, he’ll indulge you in the details of what’s got him so bothered. Become the sort of thing where you’re horny if he comes home in a visibly frustrated mood because you know what it implies ! Very talkative during aftercare though. Like your own personal little Channie gossip sesh
Minho: will rant to you between kisses while he’s ripping your clothes off. Hes definitely indulging you in all the details the second he’s alone with you- you’re the type to be on the same page about everything together, and naturally, you hate the people he hates and vice versa. So when he’s frustrated, he goes to you first about it. Sometimes it can be a very emotional sort of thing, could mean he’s shedding a few tears out of frustration and you’re there to console him about it. But when it’s just straight anger or annoyance, he’s going to rant to you until he physically cannot talk in between kisses anymore. He’ll probably even just start to fuck you while he’s still ranting until his frustration turns into the type of pleasure that replaces his words with nothing but heavy breathing and moaning. Not even sure what he was so annoyed about by the time he’s done w you !
Changbin: doesn’t want to make a big deal about it ! You have to sorta coax it out of him. And honestly, he’s simultaneously best coaxed and relaxed after a good fuck. He’s not one to be too rough or anything just because he’s upset, but he’s just grateful you’re the best stress reliever. Lots of kissing, desperate grabbing at each other and sometimes the sex can even feel lighthearted when he’s aware that you’re doing your best to comfort him. Sort of the realization that no source of frustration or jealousy is worth letting it come between the two of you. So he’ll just give himself to focusing on your pleasure and then talk it out after. He might even deny it after and joke around that he was never frustrated or jealous to begin with, but he’s still thanking you for it and eventually you’ll be on the same page about what’s bothering him.
Hyunjin: sweaty. When he gets consumed by frustration or especially jealousy, he’s particularly sloppy with his thrusts, very sweaty, probably sucks a few hickies wherever he can reach and doesn’t care to make them discreet. He’s all heavy breathing, loud groaning, just kinda wants to fill you up with his load as a stress reliever tbh. Feel like he wouldn’t say anything about it but you’d know he was jealous in the way he fucks. Also evident in the way he speaks very little- of course he’ll pay careful attention to cues to make sure he’s not hurting you or anything, but the talking will be very minimal. He just relies on his body language to indicate what he wants. If he is jealous about something, my guess is you won’t know until he’s had a few days to wait on it before saying anything.
Jisung: needier than usual ! Feel like especially if he got jealous over something, he’d be itching to get you home and fuck you like he never has before, just to prove a point. Maybe uses it as an opportunity to try something you’ve both been wanting to try. The guy at the bar was staring at you a little too long? He’s going to drag you to the car and fuck you right there, knowing you’ve been vocalizing your desire to try it, but he sees it as an opportunity to get your head spinning before you can get him even more frustrated. You can bet he’s going to walk back into the bar with his shirt half-on and a cocky fucking smirk. Has you wrapped around his finger tbh, so jealousy isn’t a huge deal ! Frustration is just opportunism for him.
Felix: particularly keen on pleasuring you. He’s vulnerable with his emotions at first, so you’ll know that he’s got something on his mind, but then he just wants to make you feel good in turn. Has you on the edge of his bed very fast, all desperate to eat you out and channel all his frustration into his tongue and his fingers. Your mood is often aligned with his- which means if he’s stressed, you’re stressed, and vice versa. Solution is to make you cum as many times as you can- and then pretty soon your satisfaction is his, too. Definitely won’t lose an opportunity to fuck you too, probably transitions to fucking you when you’re just nearly tired enough so he can make sure you’re both exhausted and satisfied by the end of it. Just treats you good all around !
Seungmin: actually doesn’t get frustrated or jealous very often. And when he does, he’s largely nonchalant about it. Will offhandedly mention something that pissed him off, and you know it’s a little more than mild annoyance when he gets quiet. It’s you who wants to pleasure him as a result, and it quickly becomes some unspoken thing between you both to just fuck out the frustration. He probably doesn’t even realize how annoyed he is until he’s thrusting into you and his emotions are elevated tenfold. He’s still gentle with you, and very set on making you feel good. But you both have the same idea to pleasure each other as much as possible, so it quickly gets rougher and sloppier. The aftercare is A1 though and you probably take like a 10 hour nap after it tbh
Jeongin: a little embarrassed that he’s even frustrated or jealous in the first place! Feels like he’s not supposed to be for some reason. He has this opinion that as a boyfriend, he shouldn’t drag his emotions into your relationship and potentially let it get between you two. But also king of healthy communication, so he’ll reluctantly bring it up to you and then apologize and swear he’s not frustrated or jealous anymore (even if he is…) and the sex that follows is sweet, but desperate. He’s just desperate to be a little closer to you, like a physical reminder that you’re his and you’re not going anywhere regardless of his moods or whatever made him jealous. He loves taking control and being able to look at you, kiss you, touch you wherever he can and just have a tangible reminder that you’re satisfied with him.
320 notes · View notes
liveontelevision · 1 month
Note
Hi! im in love with your Lucifer fics. You newest one has me gripped and i cant wait for the next part.
You got me brainstorming more Lucifer fics ideas
I was thinking of one where the reader has been helping/supporting Charlie at the Hotel and is almost like a mother/parental figure to her, and when Lucifer arrives he acts cold/mean no matter how much she tries to be polite. But then he warm up to her after see how much the reader really cares about Charlie and then he finally realises hes in love with her.
Thank you! I literally could write about him for hours (kinda have already) and I really liked this prompt, so here's just a lil' something for ya, anon ♡
Honey | Lucifer x Reader
No smut, just some cute fluff here-
♡♡♡
As soon as you arrived in Hell, your eyes were drawn to the drab-looking hotel just up the hill. And you flew to it like a moth to a TV screen. That being said, you've known Charlie and the other residents for as long as you've been dead. They've all seen you at your worst, having to be the unlucky few to explain your death. Although, Charlie's comfort really made the whole being dead thing much more palatable. During this time, while she's supported you, you've seen her through thick and thin as well. Pretty soon, you became an important part of her life, offering a more parental influence when she needed one. You didn't really die at an old age, but a lot went on in your lifetime to give you the maturity to comfort people that way and you were always happy to do it.
Considering your skill set, some of the residents went to you in the same fashion. A little task you took to, just to help out, was fixing up some articles of clothing for people. It was a great mindless task for you to do, considering Alastor wasn't a fan of having phones and TVs in the hotel. So you simply sat, humming a little tune as you fixed up something from Angel's wardrobe.
Your trance was broken, seeing a pair of slender legs in front of you. Following them up, you finally meet eyes with a nervous-looking Charlie. She's fidgeting with her fingers, still trying to find the courage to say whatever she came to you for.
"You need something, hun? You can talk to me, c'mere." With a sweet voice, you patted the cushion on the couch next to you and kept on working. She let out a heavy breath you didn't realize she was holding.
"Soooo... my dad is coming to visit and I - uh.." she still struggled to find her words. Considering you've barely been outside the hotel, you really didn't question how big of a deal Lucifer was. But to see Charlie getting flustered about a little visit from her own father did make you feel uneasy.
"I guess - I don't know, I'm just nervous, is all! It's not that big a deal, I mean, he's my dad, but also.. he's... my dad..?" You nodded your head.
"Seems like a big deal. He's the king of Hell, so it makes sense that you're nervous. Can I help with anything?" Acknowledging her feelings and making sure to keep your tone smooth, you finally set aside the mini skirt you were fixing up to face her.
"Oh! Um - I was wondering if you could bake something for everyone! Niffty's making cookies, but I think dad might enjoy something a little more.." You both thought back on the disturbing display of desserts Niffty had made for everyone in the past, it sent a chill down your spine. You nodded your head fast, taking a hold of her hands.
“Yeah, I'd love to! I'll make sure it's something your dad would like, too! How's that sound?" You absolutely loved to bake, and doing it for other people always made it even better. There was some pressure on you, considering who you were catering to, but remembering that this is for Charlie, kept any nerves at bay. Charlie, who just happened to be shedding a tear or two of relief, gave you a hug that would've snapped you in two if it had gone on any longer. You were used to those at this point.
The day went by fast, Charlie preparing and stressing over little decisions for her dad's visit. You got the OK to bake an apple pie. A specialty you would make when you were alive, you went all out. You'd always make the dough from scratch, soak the apples in a homemade cinnamon butter, and somehow managed to spiffy it up to a commercial extent. You were batting off Pentious and Niffy as best you could until he arrived.
You saw a side of Charlie during that visit that you haven't really seen before. She was nervous, sure, but it was clear she felt so defeated. Each little quip on sinners being hopeless or how Charlie shouldn't even bother in this "whole redemption deal" made you understand her paranoia more and more.
As Charlie introduced each of the staff and residents, Lucifer got distracted by the still steaming pie sitting on the table in front of everyone. He definitely wasn't the only one whose mouth was watering just by staring at it, but he was the one who bit the bullet, taking the first piece. 
"And this is -" a loud hum of satisfaction interrupted Charlie's introduction to Sir Pentious, who looked deflated at the change in topic.
"Charlie! Good golly - This is great!" With another bite and hum, you watched his eyes flutter shut for a moment. A little boost of confidence immediately making you giddy.
"Oh! Well, that's good! Because this is our other guest! She made it herself -" Charlie took a hold of your shoulders and dragged you to face Lucifer. You could feel the nervous tremble coming from her hands. You looked up at her for a moment and smiled, placing a hand over top of hers. It really did seem to calm her nerves. And for some reason, he didn't seem to like that. 
"Well - I'll eat anything with apples since they're obviously my favorite. It’s not that special." He tossed the half-finished plate back onto the table and wiped his hands clean. He ignored you.
"U-Uhm.. yeah, that's - that's everyone, I guess!" Charlie stammered, not expecting him to turn such a cold shoulder to you. He spent his time examining you. Considering he didn't even care enough to learn your name at that moment, he sure was taking his time looking you up and down.
"Well then!" He clasped his hands together after finally tearing his eyes off you. "How about a little tour?" He suggested, clearly not invested in the other sinners now. Charlie looked down at you and you nodded, starting to clean up some little things around you. It was a nervous habit you had, but it helped to keep your hands busy and your mind off the insulting interaction you just had to endure.
Charlie took Vaggie's hand and went on to give the tour. Once they were out of sight around the corner, you slumped your shoulders letting out a groan.
"Short king's givin' you the cold shoulder, huh?" Angel leaned on the back of the couch, crossing one leg over the other.
"Right? Okay, glad I'm not the only one who noticed that. Is something wrong with the pie..?" Looking over to Sir Pentious, who was licking the already empty pie tin clean, he quickly shook his head.
"Maybe's got a thing for ya." Angel teased, jabbing you with his elbow. You rolled your eyes, finally taking the pie tin from Pentious.
"He didn't even get my name, I'm sure that's not it. Whatever.. " you grumbled, taking any dishes you could to the kitchen to keep your mind from exploring that option.
The extermination day battle was here. You followed the armies who attacked the hoards of exorcists when they finally arrived. As the battle went on, you hated to admit it, you found yourself in awe watching Lucifer kick Adam's ass. The sight of his wings and the little V thing - and obviously his immense power, somehow managed to make you blush as you were attacking angels. Definitely a new sensation for you, with the bloodlust muddling your other senses, but it was easy to forget about it once the new hotel was renovated and everyone was finally settled in.
As everything went back to normal, you went back to helping Charlie with anything you could, drinking at the bar with everyone and generally things went back to the way they were. There was only one difference. Lucifer made the decision to stay at the hotel. It was commendable for sure, his change of heart to support Charlie through this change, but it only left you feeling conscious about everything you'd do when he was around. The underlying crush didn't help much. Or Angel's teasing about said crush.
You really did try, when you'd pass him the hallway, you'd always send him your most sincere smile. Or when you spotted him reading or working on anything, you'd try and spark any kind of conversation or ask if he needed help. He never needed help. He was always too busy to chat. You honestly couldn't remember a time he looked you in the eyes before. You bit your tongue. No need to worry Charlie, or anyone really, about some feud you possibly made up in your mind.
It was especially important to you to not stress Charlie right now. Starting the hotel back up was a big task alone, but the loss of Sir Pentious weighed on everyone. And Charlie took full blame for it. A late night, where she most likely stayed up to try and find any kind of hope for redemption, any speck of proof to bring sinners in, she found herself burnt out. Approaching the memorial for Pentious, you stood beside Charlie. You found her visiting it every now and then, and when you did, you knew she needed a check in. And you were right. Without a word, Charlie suddenly clung to you. She went on about how it was all her fault. How he was gone because of her. How nothing seems to be working and she's terrified that it's all for nothing.
It took a while for her to calm down, but you would never leave her like this. By now, the two of you had fallen to the ground, sitting on your knees.
"Charlie, you are doing your absolute best. It's okay to cry, you know that. Think of everything you've done for everyone else, I mean - Pen would've never sacrificed himself if it wasn't for his friends." You brushed a tear from her still wet and puffy eyes. "You did that. You gave him something worth dying for." It was a hard truth, but you hoped it was enough for her. She's done more for you than she'd ever know, and you'd do anything to give it back. You didn't realize, but before approaching Charlie, Lucifer was pacing a nearby corridor, battling the decision to go up to her himself. He hadn't said much to her since extermination day, and he had always been nervous about saying something wrong, making things worse. Before he had the chance to muster up the courage, you had swooped in. It confused him. He should've been jealous or hurt, that he wasn't able to calm her down himself. That you beat him to the punch. But he didn't really feel that way, no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise. Was it admiration? Sitting in the shadows until he assured Charlie was taken care of, he went back up to his workshop, flustered for a number of reasons.
There was one moment, where things started to look good. It was a regular night at the bar, you, Angel and Husk had gotten on the topic of your lives, looking at the positives which was a rarity. Charlie and Lucifer were nearby, Charlie enthralled in the discussions of what Earth was like.
"My homelife? It wasn't anything fancy, but.. um.. - oh I had a farm, actually! I ran it with my parents, it was.. nice." You hold onto your arms, a bittersweet smile on your face. With a light bulb going off in Charlie's head, she nudged you with her elbow.
"You didn't happen to have any birds or chickens or ducks - did you?" She hummed. She noticed the wedge between you and her dad, and it hurt her just as much as it hurt you. She's little miss "everyone should get along", of course, this hurt her. You didn't notice, but Lucifer peaked up at you for a split second before distracting himself by swaying the drink in his glass.
"Oh..? Oh! Yeah! Yes, actually! We raised a few ducklings that a neighbor gave us - we got them as eggs, so we got to see them grow up and everything!" Going on, telling a story about how you snuck one into your room to keep it as a pet, only to be scolded for it. You had the whole group in the palm of your hand. Including Lucifer. You met his eyes for just a moment, the twinkle in them immediately drawing you in. With a quick smile, he became flustered. He scoffed, pushing himself away from the bar and leaving. As much as that should've infuriated you, seeing those eyes and the growing redness across the apple of his cheeks felt like a win.
Since the hotel was newer, and word hadn't gotten out about Pentious's redemption yet, it was still vacant beside you, Angel, and occasionally Cherry Bomb. That gave the whole group a lot of time to enjoy the large space in the meantime.
Certain nights, Alastor would play the large, golden, piano that Lucifer had so generously created. This led to Charlie singing along to whatever he was playing, of course, and when Lucifer was in a good mood - or drunk - he would even pitch in. He'd sit atop the piano, his legs crossed, as he hiked the matching golden fiddle to his shoulder and played along. It was truly a sight to see. His skills were unmatched, but it still seemed to melt into the rest of the contributions. It was as if he invented the damn thing (He did).
This sort of became a tradition, when everyone was in a good mood and Alastor wasn't getting on Lucifer's nerves too much, everyone would join in, singing and dancing. It was rare, but Damn was it fun when it did happen. One of these nights, Alastor started off with a song that you knew, and had actually introduced to Charlie. She gasped as soon as she recognized the tune, pulling you close by both your hands to sing along. You had as good of a voice as anyone did, in a musical rendition of Hell, but you mainly stuck to harmonizing little things with Charlie. Swinging around with each other, until you were dizzy and laughing, you noticed that the room seemed a little empty.
Lucifer was seated where he usually was, on his phone. His fiddle was placed carefully at his side, and he was scrolling through his goddamn phone. 
"Don't feel like joining us, Your Highness?" You kept to titles since it was obvious he wasn't warmed up to you just yet. Even after living with you for a month or so.
"Mm. Don't know the song. It's not my cup of tea, just can't seem to get into it." He says bluntly, never looking up to you.
“Oh, come on! Just play along, it’s just for fun!” You slurred your words a bit, whatever you had been sipping throughout the night causing, what you would call, an outburst.
“Hm! Well, I’m not exactly here for your entertainment, am I? God forbid a sinner doesn't have fun in their eternal punishment.” The room went silent. You felt so defeated. You've been trying since the day you met him to try and at least get on good terms with him, but it seemed like he would even prefer a night with Alastor over you. Things like this never bugged you much, you tried so hard to not let it bug you, but when Charlie looked over to you, with those worried eyes, it was hard to keep back the bottled-up disappointment.
With a little sniffle and a quick wipe of your eyes with your sleeve, you start heading back up the newly decorated grand staircase, without a word to anyone.
"Heyyy - Dad..! I think you maybe.. might've... I don't know - hurt her feelings..? Would you wanna - " Charlie carefully approached her father, who immediately lit up and placed his device down when she spoke. "Could you talk to her? Maybe just check up on her..?" She was speaking barely above a whisper.
“You have to apologize. Um.. sir.” Vaggie finally blurted out. His smile was nervous, his eye twitching a bit at the concept. Taking in a deep breath, he rubbed the back of his neck, letting out a sad little laugh.
"Well, uh.. I don't know, Kiddo, maybe she's just tired." He muttered, obviously hesitant at the idea.
"Sounds like the king can't handle a little damsel in distress to me. Would you like me to comfort her, my dear?" Alastor was quick to chime in from the piano bench, offering a sympathetic smile to Charlie. Why did the concept of that make Lucifer’s blood boil?
"Oh fuck you, bambi, I can handle it." With a quick hop off of the piano top, he almost stormed up the stairs to find you. Definitely not what Charlie was hoping to motivate him, but she wasn't an idiot. She knew Alastor had his reasoning for that. She mouthed a little thank you to him, once Lucifer turned his back.
You were ecstatic to learn that Charlie worked an extensive library into the hotel. Walking into its large double doors, you almost struggled to see the back of the room with how full it was. You had a little corner you claimed as your own, leaving one of your blankets draped on the little loveseat there, and setting aside a pile of books you were still working through. It was a great place to calm yourself down after what had just happened.
Hearing heels click against the tile, you wrapped yourself tighter in your blanket as you pulled your legs up to your chest. 
"I'm fine Charlie, it's fine.. I just need a second, go back to the lobby." You shooed off the figure with one hand, wiping your face with the other.
"Ahha- Nope! Try again -" with a nervous chuckle, Lucifer greeted you with an awkward wave. Interrupting the silence by clearing his throat, he gestured to the seat next to you. With a quick nod, finally snapping out of your surprised state, you shifted your position to sit beside him. It wasn't exactly a two-person couch. Not for two people who might hate each other, at least. I mean it was a loveseat. He struggled to keep his distance, leaving your legs barely brushing together.
"Soooo.. you, uh- like.. reading..?" He asked after a long silence. You were mainly confused by his words, but simply nodded in response.
“Yeah it's - I-I love it in here.. There wasn’t anything like this on Earth, so this is nice." You managed to speak out, between sniffles. He agreed with a little hum, fidgeting with the ring on his finger.
“Glad you like it. It's uhh - just happens to be my personal collection.” He puffed out his chest, looking at his clawed nails with a little smirk on his face. He had no idea why he thought that would help, but it actually did a bit. when he looked your direction, you were slack-jawed in awe. The sight made him turn a bit red in the cheeks, quickly looking away, he patted the top of his legs to fill the silence.
“That's really cool! I guess it makes sense - considering you're older than the dawn of time- but, still. Thank you, I suppose. For letting me - I mean - us use it.” You rambled on for a moment your words became quieter the more you gushed.
“Is that supposed to be an insult?” He asked between laughter. You made him laugh. You hoped he didn't see the sparkle in your eyes at the notion. You stalled, lost in thought, before quickly shaking your head.
The two of you sat there for a moment, the awkward silence sitting a little more comfortably than before. Finally, Lucifer let out a sigh of defeat. 
"It’s my fault, right?" He asked, already knowing the answer.
"Oh, uh.. I guess so, but.. I mean, I'm kind of drunk so it might be something with that - but I'm fine, I swear." You waved your hands in an attempt to soothe the serious discussion. But Lucifer knew better than anyone what someone holding their true intentions back looks like.
"You're really good for Charlie. I.. I wish I could take care of her. Like you do." He admitted. It surprised you for a moment. Was that why he's been so cold to you? Was there some form of jealousy in there? Or was he really concerned that you would replace him in some fashion?
"C'mon, you're just saying that to make me feel better. I saw you on extermination day, none of this would even be here without that little pep talk, you’ve done more for her than you know, I think. Charlie.. she loves you." The words made him perk up a little. Maybe even a king needs reassurance sometimes.
"Oh- Um.. I guess she does, huh..?" You could hear his smile. The two of you sat in silence for a moment. You didn't even realize you had the smallest smile on your own face. But he did. With another nervous laugh, he hesitates before planting a hand on your leg, just above your knee. No time like the present, you suppose.
"I’m sorry. I really am. For.. everything. You're actually amazing. I-I mean it.." Without a response from you yet, he lets his gentle touch linger a moment longer. You leaned in towards him, the smile on your face turning sly.
"Yeah? You think so? I almost thought you hated me." You were teasing him. He's been so cold to you this whole time, you just had to take advantage of the moment. He turns a bit red, covering his mouth with his free hand as he clears his throat into his fist.
"Of course I don't.." He muttered.
"Soo, would you say you like me?" You drew out your words, walking your fingers up his arm.
"W-What? How - " He clamped his hand over his mouth before desperately trying to rationalize his thoughts, " Of course I do! I just said you're great with Charlie and I -ahh.. I love Charlie, so I like - " He coughs up his words, " - I liked your pie, that you made! And you have a good voice, too, and your little duck story was cute, so - " God bless this man's tendency to overshare when he's nervous. The alcohol definitely gave you the little boost of confidence you needed to question him like this, but you would be lying if you said you didn't notice his reactions to you whenever you weren't paying attention. Or whenever he thought you weren't paying attention. It finally dawned on you that some of those glares might have had some other motivations.
You knew when to reel it in, but considering his hand was still on your leg, he moved it up a bit even, you assumed he was okay with the teasing. Maybe even enjoying it. Delicately drawing your fingers across his jaw, to his chin, you pulled his gaze to meet yours. You could feel his hand tense at every little touch.
"You have really nice eyes, Luci-" He audibly gulped, tugging at his bowtie. "You’ve been avoiding looking at me for months.. I wish you'd look at me more." You almost pouted, your fingers still lingering under his chin. With the slightest movement, he followed your hand towards your face. He took his hand off your thigh for a moment, only for you to take a hold of it and place it on your back. He was the one who pulled you closer at this point.
“Y-you can't just say things like that.. it’s embarrassing..” He muttered, trying his best to not close the gap between your bodies. 
“Embarrassing? I’m not embarrassed, your highness. Are you? Do I.. make you nervous? Hmm?” You placed your hands just above his knees, leaning closer through your chest. Sucking in his lips, he did his best to stay silent, knowing he’d dig his own grave no matter how he answered.
“I just think you’re so pretty, Luci, I can't help myself.” Before he could properly react, you leaned in close enough for him to feel your breath against his ear. Damn, what did you drink? You could feel his hand on your back clenching, either to bring you closer or just out of sheer nerves. With a little hum against his ear, he let out the quietest whimper. It apparently took both of you by surprise, you leaned back to get a look at his face with wide eyes. Meeting his eyes this time sent you both into a blushing, nervous state.
With a deep breath, you cupped his face after brushing some of his golden locks back into place, then gave him the lightest kiss on his lips. You didn't even linger long enough for him to return it, and he was clearly distraught by it. You unwrapped yourself from your blanket, giving a dumbstruck Lucifer another quick peck on his forehead, before standing.
“I’m going back downstairs. Take your time, Hun!” You called out so sweetly as if you hadn't just left him a heated mess. 
Finally returning to the lobby, you walked with your chest puffed out, beckoning for another drink from Husk.
"Did.. did Dad check in on you? Are you okay?" Charlie carefully approached you, and was immediately disarmed by your grin.
"Yup! I feel much better now. He apologized and we had a little.. Discussion. Thanks, hun." You said sweetly, taking a sip of the drink Husk slid into your hand. Angel gave you a dirty glare, and after meeting his eyes you quickly looked away.
"Well great! Where is he? Maybe we can pick back up where we left off!" Charlie clasped her hands together enthusiastically.
"Here! I-I'm here! Great idea, honey, let's keep playing!" He tripped over himself, rushing into the room and hoping nobody saw him re-fastening his tie. Sending him another quick smile, his face clearly hadn't cooled from the past events. He nearly dropped his fiddle, but as soon as he prepared he picked up the same song that was left unfinished moments before.
♡♡♡
I wanted to get through some asks, but I'm still working on Suffer, no worries, my friends
!Taglist!
( @vififofum @thornwolfy235 @tinywolfiegirl @chipper-chip @bat-boness @misfitgirlwrites @nayomi247 @lonelynmisunderstood @escapistoftherealworld @b4ts1e @hamthepan @kyo-kyo1 @looking1016 @polytheatrix @littledolly2345 @lillianastuff @yourlocalcryptidbee @0strawberrysorbet0 @themageofblood @jayyyayaysblog @floralsightings @azmosposts @8har0ley8 @actuallyspiderwoman @sirenetheblogger @christineblood @kaytemchugh @cimadreamer @simpdevil66 @azmosposts @m3ow1 @acrazyartist @redfoxwritesstuff @4k1to @meesachan @corvusskid )
326 notes · View notes
runabout-river · 6 days
Text
Yuji's accumulated Trauma
Tumblr media
After Choso's death, I've been thinking about Yuji's reaction to it. At first glance, it looks mature and composed and obviously Yuji doesn't have the time and privilege to grieve. More importantly, Gege didn't give Yuji any panel time to be distraught; his aniki's death scene was over pretty fast. The 3000 Shibuya deaths in conjunction with Nanami's and Nobara's deaths on the other hand had been given more time and more impact afterwards.
The difference in reaction between those two times makes sense in context but, in my opinion, not with Yuji being mature and composed about it.
Because Yuji never got over Nanami's and Nobara's death, he didn't heal from that, instead, he had a negative character arc where the trauma of their deaths affected his world view and mentality in significantly bad ways.
He started to think of himself as a cog in a machine and he also identified with Mahito, the curse who killed both his friend and his mentor figure, a villain and his personal antagonist. Yuji did not overcome Mahito in Shibuya, the story makes us forget that often times. He was marked and changed by Mahito and even though that curse ended up with an extremely pathetic death that didn't mean that he hadn't broken something inside Yuji.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The only time where Yuji constructively dealt with that trauma was in his fight against Higuruma but that was only about his guilt over letting Sukuna kill 3000 people with his body. And it didn't get resolved completely, at least not in a way that would've helped with dealing with Nobara's and Nanaimi's death too.
Tumblr media
Yuji is taking that trauma from Shibuya, his feelings of weakness and guilt, and he puts them into believing himself to be a machine that has to follow a predetermined path. Before Sukuna took over Megumi, that meant being suicidal when the situation called for it. Yuji wanted his life to make sense again and dying so Angel would've her wish of seeing Sukuna dead to save Gojo perfectly fit into that.
After Sukuna possessed Megumi, his path and role stayed the same except killing himself directly was off the table but that tendency still exists inside of him. If he were to be presented a way to defeat Sukuna while saving Megumi at the same time where he would die as a result he would take that path immedietaly without hesitation.
Back to Choso's death. In my view, this unresolved trauma and his lack of will to live lead to an unhealthy coping mechanism: thinking of his friends and allies as already dead. We can see that when he asked Megumi if Nobara had survived Shibuya.
He knew that there was a slim chance she survived but it was so low that she was basically dead. When Megumi confirmed her fate, Yuji was prepared for it. Prepared to receive the bad news so instead of crying again he could function like the cog he was supposed to be.
And this Mahito-infused cog mentality still follows him until now. He has to function so his role can be fullfilled and when that means he has to think of his friends as having already been killed so he would never break again then that's what he's going to do.
Tumblr media
He did not despair over Choso's death, he despaired because it looked like he was alone and on the verge of defeat against Sukuna. His role was breaking just like his reason to live and I think that this mentality, his negative character arc, will find it's conclusion at the end of the Sukuna fight.
This fight is not the end of the manga, we still have the merger to deal with, there is still a big arc with smaller ones in between coming at us. But for Yuji something big has to happen, probably something pretty bad that has him crushed... at first.
At the end of it, he will finally deal with all his loss and his trauma in a good and healthy way and leave his life as a cog and being a human Mahito behind. Then he might finally shed the tears that were missing in chapter 259.
142 notes · View notes