#might have to write this down properly
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oh no..... had a thought about the au where tanjirou is giyuu and ayame is sabito.........
tanjirou and ayame face the hand oni, but they're both so unprepared for it. tanjirou's rib is broken, his forearm is probably fractured and he's been limping since they managed their escape. it's almost too dark for ayame to see where they're hiding in the cave, but she can feel the terrible tremors of the hand oni as it hunts for them.
the terrified expression on tanjirou's face is what makes her decision for her.
the hand oni said "sweet little fox".
maybe if he sees the fox mask and cloud jinbei and nothing else, then they might have a chance.
or, well, tanjirou might have a chance. urokodaki-san would be sad if he didn't return. urokodaki-san doesn't have anyone anymore.
ayame tears the jinbei off tanjirou's shoulders, replacing it with her kimono while he's still disoriented. she pulls it loose around her, then snatches the mask off his head.
"what - ayame, what - ?"
"stay here," she says quietly, her expression hidden behind the mask urokodaki-san carved for him. "i'll lead the oni away. don't make any noise, then make your way down to the wisteria trees as soon as the coast is clear."
"the mask - "
"tanjirou." her voice is solemn. "whatever happens... tell my shishou i was always grateful for everything."
she disappears from the cave before tanjirou can demand answers.
murata finds tanjirou and helps him through final selection. there is only one casualty for final selection that year.
kamado tanjirou is the water hashira, and he wears a dark blue seigaiha haori, the pattern dyed red. he's the water hashira, so no one wonders why he wears seigaiha. the charcoal half of his haori is hard to explain, but no one will ask.
when sabito is faced with the boulder, a girl in a fox mask appears before him. she holds himself the way a master swordsman does, and her strikes are swift and merciless. she knocks him out in ten seconds and doesn't bother to wait for him to wake up.
he begrudgingly admits that the way she moves is beautiful.
another girl, also with a fox mask, but with the mask resting against the side of his head, is the one who greets him when his eyes open.
"sorry about ayame-san," she says with a rueful chuckle. "she isn't very patient."
ayame-san, sabito learns early on, doesn't speak much if she can help it. she doesn't linger, even if sometimes he feels like he's being watched when he's alone. she continues to use a bokken while he wields a live sword, but it doesn't matter; she is always the one who deals out the first strike. often the last one as well.
"ayame-san doesn't want to show off too much," hikari says as she braids a flower crown. "she's a bit different from the rest of us, that's all. she doesn't stay for urokodaki-san after all."
"then who does she stay for?" asks sabito.
hikari's smile is secretive as she rests the daisy crown in her dark hair. "one of these days, you should ask her, sabito. you might be the only person she answers."
three months later, ayame stands before him with a steel katana at her hip. she draws it slowly - almost reverently. sabito notices that the curve of it is slightly different; it's steeper, the kissaki almost menacing.
"so," she says in a measured voice, "after six months, you can finally face me as a swordsman. hikari-san did well training you."
"you had just as much to do with it, ayame-san," hikari calls out from the side.
sabito snarls. it pulls the scar on his cheek, making him look more dangerous.
"today is the day i win," he declares, unsheathing his own blade.
ayame tilts her head. he wonders if her lips follow the same downward curl of her mask, or if she smirks at him like he always imagined she has.
"then you'd better hit me with everything you have, sabito."
time slows around him. his nose twitches, picking up a strange scent. it's metallic and sharp, like a freshly polished katana. it winds through the air, and he finds his blade following its arc.
for the first time since they met, his blade reaches ayame first.
there is a moment of stillness.
sabito can't believe his katana sliced downward first. her arms are still raised, and she doesn't move as her sleeves fall downwards, exposing the kumihimo cords she has wound around her left wrist.
the fox mask splits in half - sliced vertically in a perfect line. when the wood falls to her shoulders, sabito is shocked to meet shockingly blue eyes.
ayame's lips are parted in surprise. as he watches, her lips curl into a small smile. the slightest twitch of the corners of her lips is both happy and sad.
"sabito..." she murmurs.
sabito can never catch ayame's scent. for the first time, there's a hint of charcoal and something floral lingering in the air, muted by the scent of a summertime rain.
"you did great. remember what you just did, ne?" her voice lowers. "win, okay, sabito? beat that guy too."
sabito glances at hikari in disbelief. she smiles at him encouragingly.
"ayame," he hears himself say, "who do you stay for?"
surprise flits across her features.
"hey," she chuckles sadly, "next time you see tanjirou, be sure to say hi to him. he's so gloomy nowadays."
sabito glances at hikari, but she's disappeared. when he turns back to ayame, she's gone too.
the only thing left in the clearing was the boulder, sliced in half. exactly the same way he had sliced ayame's mask.
#me as a writer#mind drabbles#fog in the summertime#fits#fits au#fits ayame as sabito au#fits hashira au remix#higuchi ayame#sabito#kamado tanjirou#amano hikari#fits au headcanons#i wrote hikari as makomo first#then i remembered she's nezuko in this au#tanjirou has long hair in this au too#but fashions it in a low ponytail like ayame's#my boy has so much trauma#zenitsu is sanemi and inosuke is probably obanai in this au#might have to write this down properly
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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Okay hear me out
Nightmare asking Killer if there's anything he wants and Killer says he wants to go see Color in the omega timeline. He hasn't seen him in a while and he misses his friend, but Nightmare takes this to mean he wants to leave and stay with Color permanently.
He agrees, because even though it makes him deeply sad to lose one of his men, he needs to let Killer go and live with other mortals and be happy. Killer texts Color and goes to pack a bag and Nightmare opens a portal and takes him to the omega timeline. They meet Color and he's looking very suspicious of Nightmare while Killer runs up all excited and off they go.
And Nightmare goes back to the castle. He spends the rest of the day in a weird daze, feeling kind of empty. When the others inevitably ask where Killer is, he hesitates and tells them he's in the omega timeline and doesn't elaborate further.
Eventually he shuts himself in his office for the night and just sits at his desk, staring into space. He's glad Killer's happy, of course, but it still hurts that he's gone. What is he going to tell the others when they start asking again, after it's been too long to be a simple visit? Will they all want to leave? They probably all have places to be, maybe he should let them go, would that be better for everyone? If Killer, who was always so eager and happy to be here, wanted nothing more than to get out, what does that mean for the rest of them?
This is the beginning of the end, isn't it? He'll have to let them all go, and then he'll be alone. Just like when he and Dream were kids and Dream would go off with his own friends. Except he can talk to Dream now, can't he? Maybe he should ask him about this. If nothing else maybe Dream would agree to visit him, once they're all gone.
But before he can pick up his phone and call his brother, it starts buzzing and it's Killer like "Okay I'm ready to come home now c:"
#UTDR#UTMV#Nightmare Sans#Killer Sans#I dunno this has just been in my head for a bit and I wanted to get it out#I might try and write it properly if I ever finish the other thing I started#Just the idea of Nightmare having this awful night filled with anxiety and sadness and staring down the barrel of losing all his boys#And then he picks up the phone and Killer's like ''hey when are you coming to get me? it's like noon here''#Also the idea of him visiting Color when Nightmare's not looking by getting Cross to leave him out#And when Nightmare asks one day Dust is like ''he's off being gay with his boyfriend''#But Nightmare's old-timey language translates it as he's off to be happy with his friend#Like he's not happy here and wants to be with Color instead#I dunno comedic misunderstandings are fun I think
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i can not be fucking normal about him by the way
#i need to chew on him like a squeaker toy#i have plans for trying to write him and ive been trying to doodle him...#im waiting for my days off so i can properly sit down and do something#i also NEED to make gifs of him since im not really finding any? might do that after work#monoco save me monoco#clair obscur: expedition 33#monoco#kieran yaps#idk there's just something about him.....#i also REALLY want to know more about how gestrals work in general#RAAAAAAA i need to just sit down and work on something with him
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Henry and Nigel BHS vibes



my gods, i can't wait to have more time and energy to get ILY done and start working on BHS. this footsies game playing i've been having to play is not enough. the last one is great because, is it nigel or henry? both... either or... yes.
#like minds#nigel colbie#like minds 2006#murderous intent#murderous intent 2006#tsh#the secret history#Crossover#BHS#found these and I couldn’t help but share. Might actually start making proper mood boards again when I have time#They really help me write#The Henry vibes also blend into the other fic I wrote for him that I totally have to work on sometime soon#I swear I have a whole backstory for that and yet#where it at tho#Lmfao oops. No I have some jotted down but yn me. I’m the type to jot a ton of scenes but leave the connective tissue for last to really si#With it properly and develop all the details#alex forbes#The implement for killing vibes had meee oof.#henry winter#oops almost forgot to put him lol
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the idea came to me in a migraine induced dream but now im obsessed with the concept of a mu qingfang who knew the abuse bunhe was going through at the hands of og!shen qingqiu/shen jiu and did his best to treat the kid whenever he could (and bring his concerns to zhangmen shixiong, which were obviously very much ignored) and his constant worry over the situation means that when the qi deviation happens he is suspicious of shen qingqiu’s changes for all different reasons and very much protective of luo binghe -who is a sweet child and an earnest disciple who seems to always find the most incredible medicinal herbs to bring to his mu shishu as thanks for the care bestowed upon him- which means that when the whole shen qingqiu dying thing happens instead of bad mouthing luo binghe or fighting him at every chance he does his best to come over and keep an eye on things to try and help him and make sure luo binghe won’t kill himself trying to bring shen qingqiu back because he remembers that earnest kid and he’s witnessed luo binghe’s devotion to this shen qingqiu first hand and knows there is no way that the kid who cried when ning yingying found a bird with a broken wing and begged mu qingfang to fix it and the kid that would always borrow medical texts and try to find new herb combinations as if it was a game between him and qian cao disciples is actually doing anything nefarious to shen qingqiu’s corpse.
anyways in this essay i will-
#listen#binghe needs to have more people in his corner#and for some reason i have imprinted on mqf#so you get cool healer uncle#who probably smoked weed with binghe and made him promise to keep quiet#lbh and mqf bonding activity was teaching lbh to properly roll joints#anyways mqf understanding that the rituals are intricate and lqg doesn’t have any other way of coping with his grief#but the first time lqg injures lbh almost to death in a fight they get into a screaming match so violent#that no bai zhan discipline will look at him in the face without going pale for the next month#that is his nephew! who found several thought-to-be-extinct herbs for him!#also him telling sqq that lbh might have forgotten what he did but mqf certainly didn’t#a healer never forgets the wounds they heal#and sqq is just like yeah brother me neither :(#mqf is going to therapy these idiots so fucking hard#lbh also keeps trying to matchmake him with some nice demons in his court like shamelessly trying to poach his mu shishu#also he and shang qinghua are the only ones who still get the full shishu treatment#except lbh kinda bullies sqh a little for the virtue of the whole mbj situation#(hes never gonna let them live that down)#anyways it’s whatever at first but at one poont years in the future it does become a point of contempt with the other peak lords#nothing can take away from me that when bored they will squabble like children#such is the way of bored adults#i have rambled enough so normal tags now#svsss#svsss writing#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#mu qingfang#bingqiu#svsss au
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Obligatory "The Story Is Finished, So Here's The Link To Read It From The Beginning" Post for "A Murder Shared Is A Murder Thirded"
Except that link posts are still refusing to work, so you will have to settle for a link in the body of this post: "A Murder Shared Is A Murder Thirded" I do hope that you all enjoyed it -- I had fun writing it and getting to murder Bumby about as thoroughly as anyone can be murdered. >D Up next -- "The Van Dort Vacancy!" The last of the pre-crew stories for these three, featuring the gang attempting to return Victor to his parents and his home (only for things to go a bit sideways thanks to how awful the elder Van Dorts are), and some very special guest stars... Hope you're looking forward to it! :)
#valicer in the dark au#fanfic#ao3#blades in the dark#corpse bride#alice madness returns#the smiler#two stories down#fifty zillion to go XD#but yeah it feels good to be making progress on this verse :)#I do love this version of my OT3#and it was VERY satisfying to write Bumby getting his soul burned to ash#this Alice might have arguably had the worst time in Rutledge#but at least she got to murder Bumby in the most permanent way#and I felt like the main trio had some really nice moments together#looking forward to getting the ball properly rolling on The Van Dort Vacancy :D#and not just because some of my favorite Oxventure BITD characters will be making an appearance...#queued
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eden handles rejections well, but break ups & losses poorly.
i've mentioned before how eden is the type to fall hard and fast, but this is by no means a love at first sight. yes, she's quick to take liking to someone, but it's never love right off the bat. i'd call it interest / intrigued at first sight more than love. the thing is, eden is the type to be intrigued / captured by someone instantly, and she just latched onto that person and held onto that interest quite steadfastly. her feeling for that person would then develop from that point on. the more she knew about them, the deeper that feeling / emotion took place and began to develop into more than just a crush or infatuation. during this phase, rejections are understandable and eden handles it well. the moment the person of interest told her that they're not into her and would rather her stop pursuing them, eden immediately took the cue and would stop. no questions asked. rejections happen, and she has read / seen / heard / experienced enough to know not all crushes / romantic feelings would be reciprocated. no harms done. she'd take a no and walk away.
it's when those feelings are reciprocated or things had turned from a simple interest into something more that her responses and reactions change drastically.
eden loves with everything she has. i mean it when i say this. ( please read the drabble on how eden loves. you'd understand what i mean. ) she doesn't know how to love half-heartedly. she doesn't know how to protect herself and not fall too deep. she doesn't have a sense of self-preservation in that regard. when she loves, she loves with all her heart. she loves like that person is everything to her. they become her anchor. despite not showing it outwardly, eden struggles with identity crisis and almost always question whether or not the path she's walking was scripted by what ever power that was beyond her control. that's why when she loves someone, this was one anchor to say that this was not in the script. this was entirely her. her own feeling. her own heart. her own decision. the fact that she falls in love with the one she chose was a proof that she was alive. that she was a person. that she is eden. she is herself, and her heart belongs to this person she chose, no one else. eden never sees herself as human and would never claim she is one, but when she loves someone and they love her back, for that moment she feels like one.
that is exactly why break ups & losses ( death or separation due to circumstances ) are something she handles poorly.
how could you fathom losing the one person who made you feel like human instead of a weapon ? how could you ever feel whole again now that a part of you is missing ? her mind couldn't process it, would struggle to accept it despite pretending to be okay in case of a break up. but she isn't okay. how could she be ? the person who means most to her is no longer with her. she would throw herself into a journey of denial, unable to accept the truth, the cruel reality, the ending that fate had decided for her. she'd be broken. and would most likely not be whole again.
how she appears / handles herself differs whether it's a break up or loss. if it's a break up, she'd cover it well. after everything that happened so far, eden had learned to become a good liar when needed. not even those close to her would know that she was no longer the same.
if it's a loss / death / separation due to circumstances ? well, let's just say that she is already the type who would do anything for her lover. she's more than ready to literally burn the whole world down for them, so gods forbid what she's willing to do when fate decided to take them from her.
#.headcanon: eden | trailblazer#[ okay i have so many thoughts in my head but i'm not sure if i word them properly#i might reread this tmr morning & see if i'd give it a tweak here & there#bUT THE MAIN POINTS STILL STAND I HOPE#pls ... i implore you to read that drabble i linked. it's my best piece / writing this year hands down. i'm super proud of it !#it gives you a look into her mind and how she loves / sees her partner / lover#THIS IS LONGER THAN I THOUGHT I KEPT ON RAMBLING HKHJKL I HOPE IT MAKES SENSE THO ]
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how it feels like when i look for hazel fanfics
#cupid.exe#the way i promised myself i would make writing a proper hobby and then that didnt happen#i wanted to continue a wip i have rn anf the way im so sure im not even in character for the dialouge made me stop in my tracks im crying#imagine ppl calling u the number 1 fan of a character and u cant even pin them down to write them properly in character#i am so cooked im not surviving the winter i might be tearing up abit but thats me being overdramatic damn
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Comte Election Story, 6th Anniversary Event (JPN 2023)
I managed to get Comte's collection story during the 6th year anniversary event in the JPN version of the game. As usual, my translation skills are rudimentary at best, so this is just a rough/general sense of the contents. Rest of the translation is below the cut:
Sweet and lovely, our everyday life is irreplaceable. After becoming a vampire, I’ve lived with him forever like this. I seek out more and more of the man I love than anyone else--
Comte: Good morning, MC. You’re up very early today.
I went down to the dining room a few hours before dawn--only to find Comte nursing a teacup gracefully at one end of the table.
MC: Good morning. I managed to wake up somehow…how about you?
Comte: Actually, I just got back.
When I asked, he told me that the host of the party started talking to him all night, and they didn’t part ways until after midnight.
Comte: I was going to finish this cup of tea to unwind, and then try to rest til noon.
He runs a hand through his freshly washed hair and brings the cup to his mouth in a series of elegant gestures that makes me fall in love with him all over again. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve been up all night, but my heart readily starts beating faster.
Even Comte seems to notice my reaction…
Comte: …looking at me like that, are you seducing me?
Comte's eyes narrowed mischievously and he left his cup behind to approach me. A beautiful beast gazed at me as if to take aim at his prey, and he drew me in with supple hands.
MC: I didn’t intend it that way but…it’s true that I'm captivated. Your damp hair and lovely gestures are so sexy that I’m at a loss…
Comte: Saying such a thing…you’re a naughty woman, MC. Even though I tried to quell my ardor with a cold shower and hot tea...I’m glad to hear it, even though I’m far from calm.
When I raised my head--having looked down in bashful embarrassment--I can see burgeoning in Comte’s eyes an indisputable, feverish desire…
MC: Ah, mm…
His soft lips playfully brushed against the nape of my neck.
Comte: No one else would be awake at this hour…though we could be interrupted any moment. Make sure to keep your voice down.
He chuckled a little before a hot sigh caressed my skin, dropping kisses one after another. He circled around the usual place he’d sink his fangs into me, and every brush of his lips made heat gather low in my body…
MC: So impatient…Abel…
Comte: …I’ve been waiting for you to give it to me
The corners of his lips lifted a little, before he buried his fangs into my neck.
MC: Mn, ah…aaaahh…
Comte: I love you so much...and whenever we aren't together, I’m starved of you. We were miles apart all night yesterday. I’ll show you just how much I missed you.
His voice--half-intoxicated with the ecstasy of my blood--was sweet and husky with his desire.
Comte: Before you, I’m always a love-starved beast.
As I gaze into those eyes burning with emotion, an electric sensation tingles down my spine.
(Ah, I’m just the same. It’s not only my heart, my body is always seeking you out too.)
MC: Me too…all day and night, I’m always thinking about you…
Comte: --Come here. Take as much of me as you want
At his encouragement and incitement, I sink my fangs into him.
MC: ah, ha…
Pleasure washes over me in an endless cascade, every sensation in my body heightened and sharp. I clenched my hands tighter through his wet hair, and dug my fangs into him greedily to devour that wellspring of ecstasy.
Comte: I'm happy to be able to share love with you like this, as a vampire.
Like drops of water moistening desiccated earth, every crimson drop fills us to the brim--
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp saint germain#ikevamp comte#ikevamp mc#comte propaganda#if you can't already tell from the contents of this one--i straight up died after reading it#THE IMPLICATIONS. FOAMING AT THE MOUTH.#the way they're both dancing around it. MC trying to be strong and endure properly (girl same) and. comte.#THE WAY COMTE BASICALLY STARTS SHAKING HIS ASS LIKE ONE OF THOSE BIRDS OF PARADISE. I AM UNWELL (AND ECSTATIC).#THE WAY HE WANTS HER TO WANT HIM AS INTENSELY/DESPERATELY AS HE DOES HER. THE WAY HE RELISHES HER BITING HIM HARD.#IM NEVER GONNA RECOVER FROM THIS ONE#ive legit just been that ace attorney meme with phoenix holding his head in his hands for DAYS#dare i even mention 'make sure to keep your voice down.' SIR. SIR ARE YOU SRS RN#man the way in purple moon event he was like 'oh nooooo haha no hank pank in public where we might get caught that's too inappropriate~ owo#I SEE YOU ABEL. I SEE YOU MONSIEUR LE COMTE DE SAINT GERMAIN.#I SEE THAT U SIT UPON A THRONE OF L I E S#i hope whoever writes comte as unhinged as possible over at jpn cybird gets a god damn raise#i have never in my life been so directly catered to in one chara i swear#'loved-starved beast' ILL DO YOU ONE BETTER COMTE JUST LET ME IN. LET ME IIIIIIIIN!!!!!!#straight up ive said it before and ill say it again#that's my emotional support softcore yan meow meow golden retriever#every event im like 'hope this doesn't awaken anything inside me.' and then immediately its just 'failed step one.'#although all jokes aside i do find it endlessly fascinating about the purebloods how like#while they don't experience as much bloodlust there is this acute sense of biting as a vital expression of romantic interest and/or claim#i dont think its a throwaway line that comte says at the end--id actually argue a lot of his desire for intimacy when she's human (cont.)->#is because he feels a level of insecurity in his connection to her caused by the lack of shared/reciprocated biting#you know now that has me wondering if that's part of why other purebloods frown so heavily upon the idea of a pureblood/human couple#basically because they can't fulfill the most basic tenet of what it means to be coupled in that community's perception#yeesh ikevamp really went 'welcome to normative vampire politics' and im like 'I Am So Normal About This. (lie + analyzes)'
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when people bring up the racism, homophobia, transphobia, romanticization of domestic abuse / rape / pedophilia / incest, literal actual written porn of literal actual real life flesh and blood children, et cetera et cetera on archive of our own, one of the ao3 stannies’ main defenses is “you can just filter out the tags if you don’t want to see that!” when that defense has no fucking legs to stand on.
ao3 is not an archive, it is barely even a website: a rant <3 (very long)
ignoring the fact that it’s a problem that all of that is permitted on the site in the first place (i guess child porn and racism are fine, and the people who allow it on their platform are fine, as long as i, personally, do not see it), that defense literally means nothing. it’s assuming that every little thing on ao3 is tagged properly and it absolutely is not, and if you think it is you are dumber than rocks. i mean for fuck’s sake, just touching on archive warnings and not tags, “creator chose not to use archive warnings” is literally a valid option for fic authors to use when it should fucking not be.
if someone is a freak who thinks that pedo shit is hot, they might not tag it as “rape” (archive warnings OR tags). i’ve literally seen underage father/son rape porn with no trigger warning tags but “child abuse if you squint”. IF YOU SQUINT. if someone thinks that domestic abuse is actually cool and sexy when attractive people do it, they might not tag it as “abuse”. if someone is a freak who likes incest, but bends over backwards to justify it by only shipping adopted family members, then they tell themselves that they don’t view it as incest, and might not tag it as “incest”. if someone is a racist, a homophobe, a transphobe, et cetera and they wrote bigotry into their fic (or else wrote a deliberate troll fic to trigger people on purpose), do you really think they’re going to tag it as racism / homophobia / transphobia / et cetera? and some people get kicks out of writing purposefully triggering content and either leaving it untagged or mistagging it so that people will read it unsuspectingly.
even for just general content tags, it’s a mess. people just forget to tag things all the time. people deliberately won’t tag the endgame ship of their fic because “it’s a spoiler heehee”. people use the romantic or sexual “x / y” tag instead of the platonic or otherwise “x & y” tag, sometimes by mistake sometimes on purpose. it’s a joked about issue how people will tag characters or ships that appear in their fic for two sentences.
there’s no standardization of tags, which is a pretty obvious problem. what first comes to mind is the “dead dove: do not eat” tag which should just not be a tag at all because it just has no meaning. depending on the individual fic writer using it, it could mean anything from “literally the most sickening and depraved thing you’ve ever read in your life” to “horror w/ gore”. but it applies to other vague tags too - different fic writers will have different ideas of what the tag means.
in addition to that, what is and isn’t made a filterable tag, what tags are made synonymous, et cetera, is entirely up to the whims of the site staff. as an example, if you’re trying to look for fanfiction of a singular animated disney movie, the infinite crossovers with other disney movies will not actually be counted as crossovers (which they are) because they’re classified as the “disney theatrical animated universe” (which isn’t a fucking thing), so you can’t filter them out the “exclude crossovers” way. if you try to filter out the fandom tag “disney theatrical animated universe”, it’ll show up with zero fics because that tag is synonymous with every disney animated film (regardless of if the fic author actually used the tag “disney theatrical animated universe” or not), thus also filtering out the one you actually wanted to find.
and do not get me fucking started on the “all media types tags”, which also just shouldn’t be a thing because it makes it fucking impossible to find the specific fics you’re looking for. some people use it in place of tagging a specific canon / adaptation when their fic very clearly draws from one specific canon / adaptation, and you can’t filter it out because it’s synonymous with every fandom tag under its umbrella.
as an example of the issues of both the “all media types” tag and mistagging in general: as a fan of the witcher books, it used to be a fucking ordeal to find fanfiction specifically for the books (post netflix show release). some show fans would, for whatever reason, tag their fics with the book fandom tag in addition to (or even in place of!!) the show fandom tag when their fics were unquestionably show-specific, meaning i could not simply search only in the book fandom tag. i could not simply filter out the show tag, because some show fans would, for whatever reason, tag as fucking “all media types”, when their fics were unquestionably show-specific. and alas, i could not filter out “all media types” and the show tag, so that i see only those fics which have been deliberately and exclusively tagged as the book, not only because as mentioned some show fans would tag their show fics with only the book tag, but also because the fucking all media types tag filters out the book tag as well, leaving me with zero fucking fics REGARDLESS of if the author actually used the “all media types” tag. now, thankfully, i’ve thankfully seen this issue in this specific fandom lessen, but it still occurs in other fandoms and i guarantee that it didn’t lessen in the witcher fandom because of any fixing of the site on the part of ao3 staff.
another common defense of ao3 freaks is that it’s an “archive”, and therefore can’t get rid of anything anyone posts, and disregarding the fact that that is not how archives fucking work, they don’t just allow anything and also ao3 DOES get rid of fics... when they say that they don’t like proshippers, apparently, archives have... you know... archivists. they have someone or a team of someones making sure that everything in the archive is *properly fucking categorized*. they have someone or multiple someones making sure that everything they recieve (1) belongs there and (2) is properly labeled and organized. same for libraries. meaning that if ao3 really were an archive and not a sub par fanfiction website, they’d have something like that in place. something as simple as a report button for fics with a review team that will see if something’s been mis- or untagged. they’d have some kind of standardization of tags (especially the warning / trigger tags) and have proper tagging enforced in some way. and then they could also do something like stop being spineless racists, queerphobes, and pedos have the barest minimum of content guidelines saying that you can’t post fucking hate speech.
if something is mistagged or untagged, the most you can do is leave a comment politely asking that the author fix the issue, and then hope and pray that they do that. and if that person thinks [insert form of abuse] is hot, or if they’re just straight up a bigot that wrote bigotry into their fics to be bigoted, or they’re a troll that gets kick out of deliberately traumatizing people by tricking them into reading their mis/untagged fics, they might not! AND if you see a major tagging issue on an orphaned work, or a work that has an inactive author / hasn’t been updated in forever, good fucking luck getting even a negative response.
you can’t permanently block tags (i mean even tumblr.hell has that), meaning that if you would like to search for fic without coming across something troubling, triggering, or just something you don’t like, you have to either (1) do a work around by having a bookmarked link for every fandom you’re in or every character you like with all of your tags already blocked, (2) download browser extensions that do the work for ao3 because they can’t be bothered themselves, or (3) input every individual tag every time you search ao3 and don’t forget that all of those options only fucking work at all when everything is tagged properly, and we’ve already established its not. you also can’t actually block people (you can only prevent them from commenting) meaning that if there’s a specific person you’d like to stay away from your fics or a specific fic author that you don’t like and would like to stop seeing their fics clogging up the tag, you’re out of luck (though for the latter you could insert “-[username]” into the “search within results” box, but then uh oh we’re right back around to having to input that every time or have a bookmark)
their archive warning system is shit. first of all it’s functionally useless because, as mentioned, “creator chose not to use archive warnings” is an option. what’s the fucking point of special required archive warnings if you’re going to allow people to opt out anyway. second of all, aside from “chose not to use warnings” and “no warnings apply”, the only warnings are “major character death”, “graphic depictions of violence”, “rape/non-con”, and “underage”. disregarding the fact that they shouldn’t be allowing porn of underage characters in the first place (but i’m talking to a brick wall on that issue) and that “non-con” (and “dub-con”) as terminology needs to die, it’s just fucking rape lets not use weasel words... this is a paltry list of possible warnings. there’s no official warnings for depictions of: domestic abuse, animal abuse, depictions of racism / homophobia / transphobia / et cetera, suicide, self harm, et cetera et cetera. and we return to the issue of standardization of tags. in your required archive warnings at very least, there should be a standardization of what these mean, but ao3′s own faq is just like “ehh... you decide. we’ll leave it up to you”. what qualifies as graphic depictions of violence? two people may write the same level of violence, but qualify “graphic” differently, and make different decisions regarding their warnings. and we also return to the issue of: if a freak doesn’t see something that is clearly rape as rape, they might not tag it as such.
this website gets a disgustingly large amount of money every year that it doesn’t fucking do anything with. it’s been over a decade and they’re still in fucking beta. features that would actually be useful, like an actual block system, don’t exist. they technically have a report system for abuse and harassment and such, but apparently what they qualify as abuse and harassment is fickle. ao3 defenders seem to be very proud of the legal work they do for fandom / fanfic authors, but they set aside a very small amount of the money they get every year for legal advocacy, and they actually use even less of that, because it’s not the early 2000s “anne rice hates fanfiction” era anymore - you aren’t going to get fucking sued for writing fanfiction in the first place. based on their own self-reported yearly cost of upkeep, they literally already have enough money to run the site as they are now for the next twenty years.
once again: ao3 is not an archive. it is not a library. it is barely a even a website.
#specifically a website run by freaks#who care more about ppl's 'fannish experience' than they do ppl of color abuse survivors and the real children ppl write p!rn of#anyway here's the rant i promised in the coming days since that one post#also i know people will come at me and say that dddne DOES have a meaning its a signal that the reader knows what theyre getting into#so cant be upset if it upsets them#or something along those lines#but (1) we've already well established that the reader very likely doesn't know what they're getting into#because a lot of the shit on ao3 is untagged or mistagged#and a lot of stuff with the dddne tag specifically isnt properly tagged because authors use dddne as a catch all#and just put that down instead of actually properly tagging their work#and as mentioned the authors that use it that way use it for literally anything that might make something uncomfortable#from the sickest shit there is to a little bit of gore#and you can say that those authors (who use it without also tagging what exactly they're talking about) are using the tag incorrectly#but oopsie! that then circles back around to (2) if someone is using a tag incorrectly there's no way to deal with that#other than a comment and a prayer#i speak#anti ao3#anti archive of our own#fandom nonsense#my monologues
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Linktober 2024 Masterlist (Possibly Late)
Day 1
Mirror
Day 2
Friend/Companion (WIP)
Day 3
Zelda (WIP)
Day 4
Night/Dark (WIP)
Day 5
Sacred (WIP)
Day 6
Fear/Horror (WIP)
Day 7
Royalty/Noble (WIP)
Day 8
Tunic (WIP)
Day 9
Secret/Mystery (WIP)
Day 10
Species/Race (WIP)
Day 11
Music/Dance (WIP)
Day 12
Favorite Game (WIP)
Day 13
Link (WIP)
Day 14
Fairy (WIP)
Day 15
Sword (WIP)
Day 16
Time (WIP)
Day 17
Dragons (WIP)
Day 18
Shopkeeper (WIP)
Day 19
Reward (WIP)
Day 20
Mask (WIP)
Day 21
Spirit (WIP)
Day 22
Favorite Character (WIP)
Day 23
Element (WIP)
Day 24
Deity (WIP)
Day 25
Ganon/Ganondorf (WIP)
Day 26
Echo (WIP)
Day 27
Rest/Respite (WIP)
Day 28
Bones (WIP)
Day 29
Deku (WIP)
Day 30
Mount (WIP)
Day 31
Free for All (WIP)
Linktober Shadow 2024 Writing
Day 1
Woods
Day 2
Malice/Gloom (WIP)
Day 3
Puppet Zelda (WIP)
Day 4
Ominous/Suspicious (WIP)
Day 5
Skull Kid (WIP)
Day 6
Fear/Horror (WIP)
Day 7
Dungeon/Temple (WIP)
Day 8
Lorule/Dark World (WIP)
Day 9
Secret/Mystery (WIP)
Day 10
Undead (WIP)
Day 11
Demise (WIP)
Day 12
Witch/Witches (WIP)
Day 13
Shadow/Dark Link
Day 14
Boss (WIP)
Day 15
Poisonous/Venomous (WIP)
Day 16
Labyrinth (WIP)
Day 17
Dragons (WIP)
Day 18
Majora (WIP)
Day 19
Ghirahim (WIP)
Day 20
Vaati (WIP)
Day 21
Poe/Spirit (WIP)
Day 22
Chasm/Rift (WIP)
Day 23
Twilight (WIP)
Day 24
Spectral/Astral (WIP)
Day 25
Ganon/Ganondorf (WIP)
Day 26
Hands (WIP)
Day 27
Volcanic (WIP)
Day 28
Bones (WIP)
Day 29
Beast/Creature (WIP)
Day 30
Final Boss (WIP)
Day 31
Free for All (WIP)
#linktober 2024#linktober shadow 2024#masterlist#summer writes#summer writes linktober 2024#summer writes linktober shadow 2024#alright now let's see if this works lol#this will all probably be late because irl is hard and I'm focusing on my academic career in between having loz and lu rent free in my brai#and some side projects related to those#but I thought I'd at least give a try for myself if nothing else#hope I can finish these this year#writing#fanfic writing#lu x reader#kinda?#loz x reader#just to be safe#might move this/repost this on a separate blog later just to be more organized idk#And likely do LUtober properly next year if I can find the prompts once things irl calm down
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it sounds like a joke but im 100% serious when i say that the shit im learning from ochem feels worth i think about how it helps me further my understanding of what love is (longtime running background thinking project)
#AND IT MOTIVATES ME TO KEEP STUDYING EVEN THOUGJ GOD THIS SHIT IS SO HARD#OCHEM IS A REALLY FUN SUBJECT DO NOT GET ME WRONG#I LIKE IT SOOOOO MUCH MORE THAN GENCHEM LIKE THE TOPICS ARE SO GOOD#BUT OMFG I WISH MY CLASSES WERE LESS ACCELERATED PACE. NO MORE QUARTER SYSTEMS#i might retake these classes when i have my job because i want to properly sit down and enjoy learning all this#because then ill also actually remember and it wont become a big blur in my head#but yes i have a lot i think about#and of course this all leads back to needing to write my itager bible for my website...#maybe my itager bible really WILL be a huge bible 😨😨😨🤯
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"You should write for yourself, and also for people who will like your work!" they say. "Don't write for someone who will hate every sentence you put down! This will only make you stressed and overeager to prove that you're Not One Of Those Bad Writers when you could be focusing on simply writing a good story that you yourself enjoy," they said.
And okay. But also. Get this: what if -- are you with me so far? -- what if I write what I like, and then someone reads it and doesn't hate it, but makes a snarky vaguepost about it? "Then they're a cunt and you shouldn't worry about them" No but I think I can't do that. Due to being such a cunt myself.
#shrimp thoughts#rolling on my bed kicking and whinging#I just deleted a long post in which I frantically try to haha I'm so silly and unprofessional all my stuff is 100% self-indulgent and no on#should expect anything from me <3 ever <3#because statistically speaking people probably will not care about this small detail BUT ALSO someone MIGHT.#someone MIGHT roll their eyes and say 'how difficult it is to do your research properly. if you can't be arsed to make things accurate#then just write a coffeeshop au instead' and then? and then i'll have to die and explode you see.#hm so it seems my laptop heats up a lot when it's charging. but calms down a bit when i close firefox. did i fuck up the battery replacemen#somehow...? should i invest in thermal paste perhaps...? or should i just get this thing serviced... >:(
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#meg talks#feeling really down and frustrated#ever since i caught covid over the new year ive just been doing so badly#it’s now halfway through may and not only am i having all sorts of weird new pain problems#to the point where i dragged myself to the er yesterday bc my usual meds didn’t do shit for me and i spent seven hours writhing in pain#but also mentally im just. constantly tapped out#before covid i was able to keep up w news and work on research projects and write multiple image descriptions every day and read books#and keep up w friends all while working full time#like even if i was in bed p much whenever i wasn’t at work i could still read and write and carry conversations#now it’s like i can only handle all of these things in small doses before my brain just shuts off#im still keeping up w news and describing what i can and working on my research projects and trying to make connections#but i feel so slow abt everything i do#it’s driving me up the wall#ive been trying for days to get through this one academic paper that’s rlly not even that long#and i just can’t do it. not for long anyway i have to read in small bursts#and then having to take muscle relaxants for these fucking spasms that make me really drowsy and sleep the whole day away…#idk. it might not even be abt covid i might be reading too much into it but it’s just pissing me off. thinking abt how nobody masks anymore#and how every time there’s a covid outbreak i won’t be able to properly protect myself or my brothers from it#bc of this fuckass job#idk im just tired and upset
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Hi! I was just wondering if you got my other ask about a TRT au that I want to write. I want to get the ok from you before I start anything.
I went digging for your asks and found them!
First off I feel like Deadpool when he's talking about fourth walls. A fanfic about a fanfic??? that's like... DOUBLE FANFICS
Second off I'm absolutely DELIGHTED by the idea and also really honored that someone would want to do TRT fanfic??? Just got me like

I am 100% ok with it! Anything that puts more fanfic into the world makes me happy tbh, AND it feels like a lovely continuation of the cycle that got *me* writing fic plus if i eventually take parts of trt and make it a real book as planned i would love if people ficced that IT'S THE CIIIIIIIIRCLE OF LIFE
There are only only two things I'd ask (applies to anyone else who may want to do TRT fanfic, which I'm fine with).
Proper credit back to TRT. If the fic's on AO3, then the 'This work is a remix, a translation, a podfic, or was inspired by another work' option when posting is what to use, and that'll let it pop up at the bottom of TRT under the 'works inspired by this one'. If it'll be posted on Wattpad or Tumblr, a link to TRT on AO3 and an acknowledgment is all I'd ask!
This one isn't specific to your idea (which I looked over and am totally fine with!). This is more for anyone else: please do not try to finish TRT, in the sense of trying to write the next chapters. AUs are fine, Blip fics are fine (I admittedly have a Blip side fic planned but it'll be outside of the main TRT story), various adventures, Foggy musings on canon, shenanigans, NSFW or SFW scenes, whatever, are all fine! I only draw the line at 'Pasta hasn't updated in a bit so I'm going to write the next chapters and post it'.
Other than that, you are free to move about the cabin with my blessing! I'm super excited to see what you come up with!
#the red thread#ask response#the red thread fanfic#i am absolutely FINE with fic being written and super SUPER honored that TRT has inspired someone else!#I read your AU idea in my askbox and it sounds awesome (wasn't sure if you wanted me to reply to this or that one)! totally down with it!#like i said as long as it's properly linked back then i'm fine since yours also doesn't fall into category two above!#those are really the only things i'd ask of anyone writing fic for TRT#if it's AUs I can read those too!#for anyone else I might have to skip fics that are side shots of older chapters since I still have Matt POV ideas if I have the time#and I don't want to like... even subconsciously read someone else's idea and take it cause that's not nice#but I'll still support it and let it be linked via the 'inspired by' tag <3 and will read once the matt povs are all done!
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