#might make a seperate post about that I think it's so funny that A Lot of these kids just took in some other littler kids to care for

[tezzbot]

Was thinking abt the fact that IF Vector and Espio found Charmy when he was a baby, taking their "canon" ages into account, Vector would have been like mid-teens and Espio like. a preteen at the time and I love a good 'You're the age I was when we met/I did [X]/etc.' Soooo woe! That upon you Espio, it's always fucked up and evil the passage of time LOL

[nanjokei]

further guidance for newcomers coming from reddit

hi arriving redditors. here are some things i don't see most posts mention. this is for people who conquered the baby steps of joining the site. i think they're pretty important! also me clarifying on some stuff i've seen people word very vaguely consistently in their guides

under the cut because it's a chunky set of bullet points! with a few that also discuss how to keep yourself in a safe and fun browsing environment for yourself and others (mostly quality of life)

if you have any questions either send me an ask (anonymously is ok too) or reply to the post

you can enable a custom theme that shows on the web in your blog settings, if you so wish (blog settings > visibility) and then (custom theme toggle to on) this is the classic tumblr experience, but it's ok to want to hide your blog from the public. however you won't be able to link stuff on your blog to people without tumblr accounts

you can find custom tumblr themes by searching resource blogs like theme hunter or just in the tags in general (like "tumblr theme" or just "theme" and see where the other tags you may find to refine your search takes you)

tumblr is currently trying to enact changes to appeal to "new users" that make the website less friendly to its current inhabitants, such as fucking with quality of life and muscle memory and even stuff integral to the culture of the site. if you see people complaining, i highly advise against going "this sounds kind of nothingburger" and assisting in sending tickets to support the drive against such changes

there is a 250 post per day limit. you probably won't hit it though.. maybe? but people used to make post limit blogs (seperate email) for that. but that is for heavy usage users.

you can make as many sideblogs as you want. you are free to divulge whether or not it's you. of course use common sense to gauge whether or not it matters. but side blogs can be anything: maybe you want to categorize things, maybe you wanna make one into a huge fan page/blog for a specific hobby/celeb/show/game/etc, maybe a quieter space, maybe posts you feel don't belong on your blog, maybe even a blog where you reblog resources to exclusively. the possibilities are endless! (maybe not for porn, it's a little harder to skirt by these days even with muh community labels)

a lot of posts are incredibly vague about whether or not you can leave comments on reblogs. i think it truly depends. for example, if it's praise for artwork, i feel like it is truly best left in the tags. the artist can see it still! it shows up in their notifs when you reblog. in comparison, when it comes to funny text posts and pictures, you can comment as you like, but consider TPO (time place occasion). it helps to check the notes (comments only filter) to see if the quip or comment you wanna make has already been made or if OP made further comments later. again, it's a call to use your judgement and everyone has a different tolerance for this kind of thing

i see many people or perhaps most came from LGBTQ+ centric subreddits so i am surprised i'm not seeing this mentioned often: there are unfortunately a lot of terfs here. please stay safe. install shinigami eyes and engage in blocking sprees whenever possible.

in account settings, not blog settings, there is a section called "content you see". it has filtered tags and filtered post content. the difference is filtered tags is specifically for tags, for example, if you want to hide a certain show you don't like, you can have the site apply a peek-a-boo filter on it (this content contains #TAG, as in click to view). you ask, what if the person on my dash doesn't tag it as that? that's fine! it also takes into account the original poster's tags. the OP didn't tag it? then filtered post content might help. MIGHT. it's pretty helpful and unlike twitter's mute list, as far as my experience, it is not broken. for example, if you write [SHOW NAME THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE] in plain letters (with aliases as seperate entries just to be safe) it will filter any post that has the words in the body of the post. pretty useful! use this to curate your dash further or even filter out triggers.

speaking of tags. a lot of people are also vague about this. i'll say it clearly. you can add whatever tags you want to a reblog. there's no limit (aside from character lim per tag)! there's no social faux pas, unless you're being backhanded at someone's creative work, like reblogging just to dunk on it or going "i like the art but not the character" etc. when it comes to your own posts, try to avoid tagging irrelevant tags (for example, if you're making a lot of posts that are tangentially about cardcaptor sakura, think about if it belongs in the tag or not. think of it as whether or not it deserves an OC flair on reddit). again, people's tolerance differs, but especially on older media and slow tags people do not appreciate random tangential text posts (for example "i wanna watch ccs!" and nothing else)

in terms of culture, tumblr has a weird balance between "you can ask for context" and "lurk for 10,000 moar years". i would not know myself. i've been here for 12+ years *shrug* you'll have to gauge it for yourself. most things you can google "[tumblr user] callout" and figure out from there LOL (yes that's usually what happens). i DO encourage trying to garner it from context, especially for terms.

due to the looser moderation(?) on here, LGBTQ+ and other minorities use their own discretion reclaim slurs freely. join in, or put the slurs in your filters. it's fine not to join in as that's your personal comfort, but this is a heads up that the culture is like this since i'm not sure how the moderation is in places like r/196 are. (sorry i used reddit for entirely different things ><)

DO NOT TAG D0NATION POSTS WITH #D0NATION OR ANY OTHER VARIATION. this is SO important. it's best not to tag donation posts AT ALL. tumblr internally flags them and suppresses the post. just reblog silently (d0nate if you can) and move on (censoring just in case lol)

search is useless for finding specific posts. give up before you even try. your best bets are google, asking for help on the dashboard, or just hoping it shows up on your dashboard one day (it probs will, maybe not immediately when you need it though)

i called old tags "slow" but not dead earlier: tags Do Not Die (though some just kind of randomly get wiped or lose posts, idk, it is some post-2018 indexing weirdness) so you can find fanart and posts from 2012 and it's ok to reblog! the essence of tumblr is the continued circulation of people's creations

please do not repost screenshots of tumblr posts unless they are no longer accessible (reblogs locked for example) 😭 i am seeing this happen already. this is the one thing from reddit you're gonna have to let go of. twitter and other place screenshots are OK (probably, some people don't like them). but don't let your page look like one of those r/(etc) post aggregate bots on twitter is what i'm saying. once you explore a tag enough times you'll know what is usually appropriate to post (usually derivative meme templates are OK, but don't overdo it (tho this just falls under "dont spam") (also this is MY personal preference, so if the climate of the tag houses a lot of memes, go ahead!)

in general reposting content that isn't your's is kinda eh. especially reposting people's art without explicit permission. there are art reposters who in the modern day usually ask for permission, of course there are internet spelunkers who repost content from old web and dead sites. there's a lot of nuance, but i highly discourage reposting things you didn't make yourself unless it's stuff like official art and whatnot. photography and other stuff from other people, use your judgement. and as an aside i know "stolen memes" are r/196 and other meme subreddit cultures but it's not exactly appreciated here and i feel like if the reposting gets out of hand tumblr users might get real tired of it. the humor isn't really the same here in that sense, i suggest posting them in a sideblog that archives such things so they aren't lost and/or keeping them in your community tags. ofc no one can stop you!! but the whole highly derivative fried meme thing is very reddit. the culture could not be more different even if we are similar in many ways. i mean this in the nicest way possible >_< if you're not sure, DON'T REPOST.

this is just advice from me, but when liveblogging a show, it's nice to tag it with a unique tag, such as #[your name/nick] plays [game]. i find it's ok to tag series name to some posts that are more substantial, people are happy to see others enjoy what they love, but using a unique tag also helps people track YOUR liveblog since they may save the tag to look at :)

put your age or whether or not you're an adult somewhere where people can see, (and your pronouns too or lackthereof). whether or not if it's on your bio, or an about page, or a carrd. please. it's a matter of curation and safety. some people don't wanna follow minors by accident and vice versa, just as a means to curate their space

people write alt text and image descriptions in the post bodies pretty often. yes it's built into tumblr, but either some people forget or the feature... refuses to work that time. yes it's BROKEN. if you feel like you can contribute alt text for an image in an adequate fashion, go ahead!

try not to reblog people's personal posts. asking people never hurts!

you can restrict non-followers from replying to your posts, or turn off replies all together. as far as i know it's not possible for seperate posts unfortunately, just a blog-wide toggle. when replying to someone specifically, be sure to @ them so they can see it!

for a long time, only the first 5 tags you used in an original post mattered. a lot of people still repeat this, but in my experience this seems to have... changed?? i can't say for sure, but my posts appear in tags beyond the first five. just to be sure, tag the most relevant things first! (or not, if you have your own strategy LOL)

you're free to not tag trigger warnings (it's nice to do it for others tho especially if they ask) but please tag flashing images as such. #epilepsy warning, #flashing, #flashing image, #flashing, etc.

REPORT BOT BLOGS. it blocks them for you anyway. just blocking doesn't do anything for anyone

you can add other people to a sideblog to make it a group blog. this is how blogs with mods work, or even collectives, it has a lot of uses in general so have fun with it! be wary it requires getting someone's email so be safe about that and try to do it with people you trust.

this is advice from me since i noticed after publishing this post that a lot of reddit users don't tag things. you don't have to btw!! but my advice that brightens up the website: if you reblog cool art, writing, music or photography (taken by OP) and you like it a lot, i highly recommend leaving compliments in the tags. we live in an age where creative creation is increasingly unappreciated and people are quiet silent— creators get no feedback therefore no encouragememt to keep creating. this is more like a personal plea, but like to reblog ratios have become DIRE. people are apathetic and scared to interact with people's creations even though on here they are actively ecouraged to. if you like art or fic etc i even more highly recommend you reblog it. likes don't do anything! reblogs = more eyes on it. let's support each other's creative endeavors 🩷

don't fall for the trap of trying to make tumblr into reddit, or trying to recreate the feeling of a subreddit. it's not gonna work. try to adapt. it's easier said than done but lol. rome wasn't built in a day. operate your blog like your own space rather than trying to recreate a hub. the tolerance for trying to change tumblr culture is super low and a lot of people who are much meaner than me will probably try to bully the idea into the ground. and people DO get mean. (like playground namecalling, but people have no reservations about it, so it's stuff that would probably get you banned on reddit)

if your post gets traction and the note notifications annoy you, deleting the original post will make the notifs stop coming. a lot of people reblog the post to keep it on their blog then delete the original to effectively "mute" the notifications permanently.

[moononmyfloor]

My Year End C-drama Review (2023)

Last year, I did two Cdrama Wrapped posts for each half of the year. This year, I watched so much stuff right away I got arrogant and was about to do a January-February summary. And then life happened and handed me my entire ass, so here we are right back on the ground zero.

Well, not exactly. I watched lots of dramas I liked this year and would like to give nods to as many as possible, and before I start forgetting details I thought I better go ahead with the entrees that I'm sure of the answers.

My initial Cdrama reviews were inspired by anniedelavoye's this post 2 years ago, I've extrapolated a lot from there but some entrees remain same.

Part 2

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1. First drama I finished in 2023

Hi Venus. Modern workplace romcom isn't my go-to-genre, least of all if the ML is a CEO. If not for the unusual-for-the-genre setup of initial few eps and the strong recommendations of my friends, I might not have pressed play at all. And I'm so glad I did because it turned out to be one of the most refreshing takes of the genre, it was funny, the pacing nor the dialogues were ever draggy, the characters were intelligent and pleasant, and down to earth. It never leaned to the tropes of helpless/badass FL or tsundere/beta ML extremes, there was no dramatic villain arcs, down to the supporting characters everyone were so reasonable and mature and simply had the nicest time ever together. Now I put it like that, it sounds boring but trust me, it wasn't. Do give it a try. Your time won't be wasted.

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2. An actor who took my breath away

Jing Boran as Lan Jue/Peizhi from The League of Nobleman

I mean

Look at him. Instant KO.

I remember watching this scene (and every scene that followed after, especially when he had his hair down) and being in disbelief about how he's real. He's literally glowing out the screen! His performance as a model scholarly minister, the way he conducted his glance, his steps, his speech and temperament were nothing but enchanting and... look, I can write poetry about him for ages lol.

And then I watched every single work I could find of him and ended up even more in love, because his resume was nothing but diverse. A measured scholar, a bubbling-out-of-his-skin social butterfly, a ballerina in a tutu, a man pregnant with the cutest radish monster ever, there's nothing he cannot play. I'm definitely going to check out every single work of him that'll be coming out in the future as well. Even if the plot fails, his character will surely be interesting.

(Also, I was FINALLY lured into DMBJ fandom thanks to going down his profile as well, and now I'm here to stay🤭)

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3. Most relatable character

Bai Moxi from Gone With the Rain

She was street-smart and sassy, but never foolhardy. She wasn't a damsel nor was overly clever. She had her moments of daydreaming, but she knew what was and wasn't reasonable. She had a high sense of self-worth, she also knew when to make herself scarce. Despite being the most outgoing and energetic personality in the room, she didn't make everything to be about herself. In fact, she couldn't have been happier to be a background supporting character of the story, quietly minding her own business in her corner. In summary, she just felt very real, and exactly like how I love my FLs. Every decision she took felt like what I'd also have done in her situation. (Btw I hope noone messages me about loving Moxi but hating her sister because I don't. I think her character also made a lot of sense based on her circumstances even though she was bit more difficult to love than Moxi.)

Most of all, she was played to a tee by Zhang Nan, the young actress was allowed to shine to her true potential in this role, as she used to be quite stereotyped in either bubbly or petty mean girl roles. The drama horribly fell apart in the latter quarter (I'd like to pretend it all ended before that Great Seperation Scene), but I'm going to remember her charaacter for a long time to come.

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4. Most inspiring character

Li Lianhua from Mysterious Lotus Casebook

The tumblr tag for MLC is already filled with Grade A+ poetry, prose and analysis dedicated to him and I'm not capable of wording it any better than them. All I can say is he really touched a vulnerable corner of my heart, and gave it strength. He's just so very admirable and represents all I ever want to be, and his entire character design and all its metaphors and philosophy especially resonate with me as a Buddhist. Like Cheng Yi said at the end of MLC concert, "At the end of the day, if you have a lotus flower in your heart that you can call your own, that's what matters."

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5. Best Couple of the Year

Lu Zhaoxi and Ye Shilan (Zeng Shunxi and Liang Jie) in Hi Venus, Zhao Jian and Yuan Zhongxin (Zhou Yutong and Zhang Xincheng) in Young Blood 2

Here are two couples who were each others' equal match in every big, small and miscellaneous ways possible. Where their roles in their partnership did not have anything to do with society-determined gender or power dynamics, not about conforming to them nor about beating them. Everything about their relationships simply had to do with what they meant to each other their admiration, respect and love towards the other person, from beginning to end. In Hi Venus, it was never uncomfortable to watch Shilan being Zhaoxi's subordinate, for he always treated her like any good superior should in any healthy professional relationship. In Young Blood 2, Zhongxin would fully trust Zhao Jian with everyone else's and his own life, not because his head was in wishful romantic clouds but because he was 100% confident in her capabilities and would never disrespect her with "girls should be protected, you stay back and let me take the sword for you" nonsense.

I may check out like 50 dramas per year and may never come by such Het pairing dynamics in some years, yknow? I do not hate on any other kind of dynamic (plus I'd have next to nothing to watch in that case lol) but, THIS... this is so rare -for me to not be icked out by not even a single second of a fictional het couple's screentime lol- hence the gushing! (Though I know I'm not doing the greatest job of phrasing what I feel😆).

Following that note, though not a couple, honorable mentions to Chufeng (Bi Wenjun) and Robin (Zhu Zhengting) from Silence of the Monster who took Sui Yi (Sun Yihan) into their home not because they thought it'd be chivalrous to help a girl, but because it's the nice thing to do as a fellow human. For continuing onto integrating her into their world with ease and enthusiasm not because any of them had feelings for her but because they simply found her a good friend to hang out with.

Suffice to say I DIG ANY relationship where gender does not come into play, like, at all (or barely, if you must).

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6. Best harem of the year

Orchid and Lotus harems (from League of Nobleman and Mysterious Lotus Casebook)

(Only sharing the pics of Orchid Harem because it was from the earlier quarter of this year, whereas pics of Lotus Harem will be everywhere in the Cdrama scene for quite a while to come lol)

The support group of devout puppies, zhijis, friends-with-benefits and all sorts of other polycule postions, all centered around one precious babygirl enigma of a man is just my jam, and I love it when it happens because it brings forth the fandom's most unhinged high-art. 😌😌😌

(ALSO ME AND WHO WHEN!😭)

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7. Best ensemble of the year

Young Blood 2, I Am Nobody

For me a perfect ensemble is where the supporting characters are just or almost nearly as engaging and thoroughly written as the main leads, you'd love every second spent on any character just as much as you love that of any other. The ultimate relaxing experience where your brain doesn't have to pick favorites and you don't have to speed watch or fast forward or be antsy about who's going to appear next because you know it's gonna be enjoyable no matter whom.

And this year, it's Young Blood 2- with its Class 7 members who were all so different but all so compelling and equally contributing to the plot, complimented by the Class 8 and the unnervingly captivating villains.

And I Am Nobody- with its extensive spread of young and old heroes/antiheroes alike, all with dramatic backstories and individual charisma that were not second to another.

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8. Favorite posters/promos of the year

Mysterious Lotus Casebook, Young Blood 2, Sunshine By My Side

Really liked what MLC did with positioning the characters on various spots of the titular Lianhua Lou, the wind-sway choices for the wisps of hair and the skirts... idk the exact angles of it all were just right for each character and their vibes and appealed to me a lot.

The blending-into-painting style poster of Young Blood was so pretty too, plus these Suoyi raincoat posters.

The comic strip posters for Sunshine were also super cute, unique and perfect for the drama's themes.

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9. Best opening credit sequence

Love You Seven Times

The drama itself was a hot mess but the opening sequence was entirely worthy of being a parallelish-universe story to Love Between Fairy and Devil without a debate. IF ONLY they put the same effort to the story itself.

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10. Favorite Prop/Set designs

A League of Nobleman- Lan Jue's Tea Pavilion, Mysterious Lotus Casebook- Lotus House

I wish I could install a fixture in my home where me and my imaginary homies can chat over tea while being seductively separated by an active stream of freshwater, while my not so elegant period-style caravan is waiting outside in the yard for more cozily cramped get-together times. 🤧

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11. Favorite lighting/color grading of the year

The Forbidden Flower, My Journey to You

The former, a kaleidoscopic explosion of colors, a celebration of fleeting life, youth, summer and nostalgia. It was a daring drama on so many fronts and nailed each of them as well, and the use of colors represented its bold soul perfectly.

The latter, a marvelous combination of mountains shrouded by mist, dark-toned wood pavilions and fur-lined robes, pale, dusty makeup with rosy lips and plump cheeks; all combined together on screen to bring a palpable ambience of a secluded glamorous hideout in a dystopian world and its ethereal residents. Seriously, how I especially loved to stare at the bride candidates in their white getups, it was like the light bounced off of the fabric to shine on their faces even more, and the skin and hair looked non-oily and baby soft. And it didn't feel over the top but convincing because the camerawork and editing conjured a believable image of an upcountry with dense and dewy forests, waterfalls and rivers, there's no sun, no heat no sweat, only cold air and pregnant humidity. OF COURSE you are going to look like THAT.

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12. A drama that taught me new things

Hi Producer

The infuriating thing about Yu Zheng's show-off genre of costume dramas is that the story may be a hit-or-miss, the "historical facts" provided in them may need to be taken with a grain of salt, but they almost always provide me with great entry points to do my own research 🥲. Most niche facts that take me by surprise and things I'd never have thought to look up on my own are randomly sprinkled all over the place and I run around like a headless chicken trying to collect them all.

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13. Most exhilarating drama/scene

Three-Body

That scene in ep 5. The entire buildup to it and the resolution. The phenomenal acting bringing forth the exact emotion and exact tension required. The moment you start to understand at least a sliver of why exactly all the characters are making this much of a fuss about what's happening to them.

I cannot spoil, not even a bit. You'd have to see for yourself.

I Am Nobody

(lol Three Body and I Am Nobody. I swear that was an unintentional coincidence!)

The great V-match between certain two characters, I can't elaborate. (See the thing about exhilarating scenes is that you have to see it for yourself what's the big deal is about lol.) I really liked how both their biggest vulnerabilities and yearnings were pulled out mercilessly in public, how they both fought themselves through each other before actualizing the philosophy of what it was all about. It was beautiful to watch visually as well.

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14. A drama location I'd love to visit

Yunnan province

I've seen glimpses of the prosperous and both naturally and culturally diverse Yunnan province through Bite of China Documentaries and Dianxi Xiaoge's vlogs, the beautiful bucolic backdrop of Meet Yourself only heightened the wish to experience it all in person.

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15. A drama that was a pleasant surprise

I Am Nobody

Perfect casting job, earnest effort from everyone involved to bring out the 2D to live action in the bestest way possible, it was like a dream come true to see a genre that was previously limited into written media like comics and fanfics (modern cultivation) as a drama even if it meant labelling all the cultivators as aliens lol

It had a lil bit of a flavor of western coming-of-age/"teen gets powers and goes on an adventure in search of their origins" stories, a bit of Japanese anime presenting style and the chaotic-gaggle-of-youth-and-veterans-with-different-extreme-powers genre vibe. And then they incorporated Chinese wuxia philosophy into it and made it their own thing. I hope to see more of this in future, and definitely a season 2!

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16. An old drama I watched in 2023

Shaolin Wendao (2017)

This is one of the best period dramas I have ever seen, but I don't recommend it unless you have a strong tolerance for angst. Like, worse than Royal Nirvana and Heroes (2022) level of angst.

HOWEVER, unlike those two, Shaolin Wendao will leave you feeling rewarded for your suffering. This drama achieved a number of things that very few other have managed to do, especially for a story with such a heavy and dark premise.

The characters remained true to their selves from beginning to the end. They grew up in various ways, at the same time remained consistent. The story made sure to make all the characters aware of their individual faults and address them.

The characters were put through immense wringer but also provided viewer with the resolution they deserved. It was SO exhilarating at times, I cried. It felt like a detox, sometimes.

They prioritized telling a realistic story about the changing nature of humans. The ending was blissful but not in the idolized, wrapped-in-a-bow-tie way one would imagine. They wanted to tell a story about tribulations and letting go, and did exactly that.

It will ignite the pain but will also make sure to thoroughly quench it. So there's that.

Oh and also, respect to all the actors. All those characters were so layered and had some quite difficult scenes. I do not understand how Guo Xiaoting didn't get any good roles matching of her caliber for years after this. She was magnificent.

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More Posts by Me

[venbetta]

Ooo, the headcanons were really cool!! Do you have anymore you'd like to share about Freddy, or perhaps some on Monty?

Indeed I came up some for Monty (I'll do Freddy a little bit later again today, he's very fun to write about).

Montgomery Gator

Monty is probably close to most fanon interpretations that I've seen, which he's mostly an misunderstood, angry, infamous bassist. Unlike Freddy, Faz Ent don't keep him supervised, therefore makes Monty a wandering delinquent through the Pizzaplex.

Compared to his chill disposition in the promotional art, he's close to the completely opposite. He's easy to anger and frustrate, he's not good with socializing with guests like the others (he can handle teens and adults but younger kids are under his radar). His time is mostly spent golfing and at the catwalks, since not many people go into Gator Golf. He doesn't get a lot of attention like the other glamrocks.

At night, its the same case, except he vandalizes parts of the mall and his room to release frustration. The techs and staff are afraid of him, so his maintenance is infrequent and mostly rare; when he's sent to Parts and Service, they always have to shut him down as a safety precaution. And since he's so imposing, he doesn't get punished a lot, making him an absolute menace to his bandmates and staff. When he's not breaking stuff, he's mostly quiet and brooding and playing his bass in the corner.

I think that's what makes him and Freddy foils of each other.

Quick tidbits

Monty's companion would have to be Roxy, since they're both new mascots in the entire Fazbear lineup, and they both have... problems that they definitely vent to each other about. Two broken besties.

Monty enjoys playing bass and drums, drums aren't something he gets to play often but when he does, it feels right for him (think of Gwen in ATSV when she plays drums lol)

He and Freddy have a bit of a rivalry, on Monty's end he just wants what Freddy has; that being attention and fame, Freddy sees Monty more as a nuisance (I might make a seperate post about these two's dynamic hehe).

I know it's messed up but... I love angst. Monty decommissioned Bonnie, it was a mix of Vanny's influence and his own envy

After the events of SB, Monty feels guilty for it, thus resulting in him isolating himself and being angry most of the time. This poor gator doesn't have a single happy joint in his body.

On a lighter note, he and Chica have a friendly rivalry. He doesn't know how to play guitar as well as her, but they like to show off to each other

The only few things he doesn't destroy are his bass and the plush toy version of him

I wanna be funny and imagine he has a plush toy of Freddy that he doesn't necessarily destroy but beats with his fist and talks shit to... (and sometimes cuddles with bc I'm a monteddy shipper, leave me alone)

He's not a fan of being touched that much, and he doesn't try to touch others due to his claws. Man's is touch repressed and touch starved.

I know this a cliche interpretation of Monty, and some of these things feel a little out of order (maybe that's just me). I imagine he gets better after SB and kinda comes out of his isolation and anger over time. Soooo yep, those are my Monty hcs

[13thdoctorposts]

Sacha Dhawan Panel Part 2

Please note this IS NOT word for word, but so you can get a general gist of the panel from Auckland Armageddon in June 2023.

Whovians of all ages got to ask him questions. 

This post is just Sachs’s second part of the panel there is a seperate post for Michelle’s panel, Michelle and Sacha’s panel and Sacha Panel part 1

Moderator: has anyone ever told you you're on their hall pass list? You know 5 people you can have relations with without your spouse getting upset?

Sacha: really?

Moderstor: yeah have you not heard about this? Supposedly there this list of celebrities if you meet them you get a hall pass

Sacha: Wow… Any takers?

Laughing from the crowd

Moderator: right next

I’m a fan or The Great and Doctor Who but I dont think there's a character more different from the Master then Orlo, when you do a character like Orlo who’s the only straight, non comedic character do you approach that differently then someone like the Master who is flamboyant? 

Sacha: yeah you do… those characters are so different you always try and find the truth in the character, I create a back story for the character, why they are they way they are why they make the choices they make in a certain way, which hopefully shows I can play a range of different characters. Its always coming back to some element of truth. I make a bible for all the characters that no one ever sees I have one for the Master, and you just hope if you keep coming back to that that it will pay off.

When you were given the tissue compressor obviously you have lots of fun playing around with it like leaving little gifts for the Doctor but is there a reason your version of the Master was so obsessed with shrinking people? Is it compensation for something?

Moderator:… and were going back to screening questions

Sacha: you know what I never thought about it like that but I now am, maybe it was. I think it was just his thing, his ability to just shrink people and throw them away and there’s actually a scene in the centenary special where there were loads of shrunken people dotted about that I had shrunk, all the top seismologists and in the scene with Jodie I thought it would be quiet funny just trample loads of peopled the BBC were like lets not do that, he’s just killed like 20 people that might be a little too much.

Where did you get the inspiration from for the fast clapping thing?

Sacha: you know what? when I sent a tape to Chris, just an audition tape to show what I could do, what my take would be and they give you a few thoughts on it and it was the plane scene, the revel that was the scene I put on tape for them... but on the day theres so much adrenaline going no one really knew how I was going to reveal and the truth of the matter is I didn’t know how it was going to be either. I just remember doing the first rehearsal on that plane then the switch happened and I think that's what’s great about the Master you just become overcome with this sense of adrenaline and craziness and if you just submit to it, crazy shit just happens and I remember the clap just came and the twirls and stuff like that just happened. I remember rehearsing and Bradley Walsh saying you do this thing when your playing the master you clench your butt, and thats just something that happened ‘oh look at his butt he’s clenching it again’ lol,  so yeah like I said crazy stuff happen.

Why was he looking at your bum?

Sacha: have you seen my bum?

Moderator: hands up who’s going to watch that scene again

Do you have any head canons for your character or any others on the show?

Sacha: what’s a head canon?

Moderator: it’s like people who write fan fiction do in their head about how this is what happened.

Sacha: oh… has anyone shared that with me?

Moderator: yeah

Sacha: I do get a lot of like the Doctor and the Master being totally in love, I’ve been sent some naughty kinda like fan art

Moderator: Was the bum clenched

Sacha: well they were unclenched!

Moderator: what has become of this panel?

If in the future theres a timeline where the Master does become the Doctor what does the interior of the TARDIS look like?

Sacha: well we saw the Masters TARDIS didn’t we, but I think it would just be a 24 hour party just happening all the time, loads of people in there, you’d be like who are all these people and he’d be like I don’t know we just do all this crazy stuff together, I'd just love an entourage of people from all walks of life he’s just collected from all different times.

Theres a just dance set up here have you ever danced to the Rasputin song on just dance?

Sacha: I was thinking about doing it, I went yesterday and queued up but I saw the talent that were throwing some shapes out there and I was like no thank you, I can't compete. 

Do you think you could win a fight against your Master?

Sacha: you know what I think I could but you know what I'm worried about? I think he might have something up his sleeve that would completely blow me to a million pieces, so yes and no

And Do you think you would be able to win against Michelle's Missy?

Sacha: oh yeah, easily hahaha

Moderator: I hope no one recorded that because if she finds out…

Sacha: laughing

What are the top 3 reasons you think the Master is better than the Doctor?

Sacha: I think he can do things she just won’t be able to do’s he’s more fearless than her shes too moral, hmmmm, what else makes my Master better?… I think he’s definitely much more sexier, cooler and she need needs companions… boring, I dont need anybody.

Moderator: actually costume changing, the Doctor wears the same clothes all the time 

Sacha: very true

Who do you think. Your Master would want as a companion in the TARDIS?

Sacha: Oh I dont think he wants companions, I think he'll pretend that he does then literally bin them when he’s done with them and find someone else

Since David Tennant has regenerated into the Doctor 3 times now do you think the Master could regenerate back into your Master and would you be up for that?

Sacha: Kinda yes and no really, when I finished the centenary special felt like it was the end of my era and also I was asked to appear in more episodes of Doctor Who but I kinda like coming in with a bang then leaving I didn’t want people feeling like ‘oh here he is again’ especially because it was such a great response to O and the reveal, but you just don’t know later down the line. It’s amazing Russell is back and I already know he’s going to do so many amazing things and some great actors are attached to it so it would be interesting to see what happens, so never say never but I fell like right now I’ve done my bit with it.

There was a lot of companions while you were there, old and new coming back who was the best companion, like not in terms of acting but in terms of character that you liked to play around with.

Sacha: I would probably say Bradley Walsh, and John bishop was in it and he’s another comedian and such a great character it would have been nice to mess around with him as well.

With the Doctor in the past you’ve had them meeting previous incarnations a number of episodes over the years, I’m wondering if through the use of CGI trickery would you like to see your Master with the original Master played by the late great Roger Delgado?

Sacha: 100%, actually going back to the centenary special people asked if I watched any of the other Doctors and actually did watch him and I mentioned that to Chris that as crazy as I am what I loved about Roger Delgado is he was very still and theres a sinister to him, so yeah definitely love to go back work with Roger Delgado.

The Master had a lots of really cool costumes I was wondering if you had a favourite?

Sacha: Yeah, I think, im not sure if you remember the purple jacket and all that? I think that was quite a favourite because one of the best things about when you incarnate that role you have a real say about how you want the costume to look and so I collated loads of pictures like steam punk and theres a band in the UK called Arctic Monkeys and I was really intrigued by Alex Turner and just him as a person and what he worse I sent loads of pictures to Ray Holman and Ray Holman being as amazing as he was came up with bits of the costume and it just worked, it was great. I remember trying it on for the first time and thinking yeah this feels good. I think if the costume wasn’t right it was my biggest worry, that if I didn’t get the costume right that I wouldn’t quite find the character. But having the purple jacket and the check trousers it just all felt so right and when I finished on Doctor Who as a present they gave me everything the whole costume, shoes, tie piece all the little bits the tissue compressor, so I’ve got it and I’m just waiting to sell at the right time (laughing this was said in jest)

Did they make a Jodie costume for you or did you wear hers?

Sacha: No they did (make his) we're slightly different sizes so there were elements of it but no they made it which was cool and obviously in that centenary special there was the one with elements of all the other Doctors, it was a mash up so it was really fun playing around with that, and they were asking me how do you want to wear it and it was great because then Jodie had to mimic how I wore it which was really cool.

And thats it, the end of Sacha's Panel. Both Michelle and Sacha were phenomenal and made the weekend one not to forget.

You can check out the other panels here Michelle’s panel, Michelle and Sacha’s panel and Sacha Panel part 1 .

[echoinghowls]

Why Dream has a healthier fanbase than JSchlatt: and why that sentence can never be true.

Continued beneath the cut...

Reason 1

Dream can't tell his audience "no".

This isn't completely true, I'll admit. He's very good about calling his audience off of his friends, and minimizing damage caused by his fanbase.

However, what I am talking about is the reason they have to be called off in the first place.

Dream has said yes to/ allowed:

Shipping between himself and friends

Smut (of him and his friends)

Fans (after his face reveal) to post his face/ make it their pfp

People to dedicate their entire life and personality to him

Basically, Dream just REALLY needs to set some boundaries. Of course it doesn't have to be a lot, having a super big/ active fandom must be fun (if a little scary)! BUT some healthy boundaries could be:

No Smut (people will make it anyways with shipping. at least someone won't show up IN REAL LIFE wearing a shirt of him FUCKING HIS BEST FRIEND)

Don't buy the L'Manburg flag (not only is it merch that all of the people of l'manburg could have sold together, but when people are treating it as another pride flag I think that's too far. ((Think of how a "Classic American" who loves the American flag thinks/ feels and multiply it by at least 10. that is how some of these fans are.)))

After his face reveal, ask people not to plaster his face everywhere. He didn't show it at first for his own reasons, and I can't imagine what it was like going from nothing to it being everywhere at once. That had to be overwhelming, and yet as far as I'm aware he said nothing.

Not everything he says is true! DEAR GOD!! People need to stop treating everything he says like it's religion!!!! Like, he's a great guy and a good content creator but seriously!!! Let him make a joke sometimes!!

Irl and Online are seperate things. I feel like Dream's fans aren't aware of that?? Like, Dream only shows you what he want's you to see. Like in his face reveal video, he sat at an angle the entire time. For no reason other than that was probably how he liked it the most! Because he didn't want to show us his other angles yet! And his videos? edited. shit cut out that he thought might offend people/ hurt people's feelings, or most likely because it was boring. Can you imagine how differently you would view him if you hung out with him as just another person? Imagine meeting Dream irl before the face reveal, and you don't know it's him and you guys spend a day together. You would probably not like him as much as you do online!! Because it's a persona!! Because it is so incredibly toxic to put every part of yourself online!!! Let him have some privacy and NOT ASSUME YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM!!!

Anyway.

You're probably wondering "why JSchlatt of all creators? he's the opposite of Dream!"

No, I don't think so. I think he just has boundaries. If he didn't like something someone in his audience said, he made a point of saying how much he dislikes the joke and, after poking a but of fun at him, his fans stop.

Because they respect Schlatt.

Dream's fans don't respect him, they obsess over him.

Remember when Schlatt mass banned people with a Dream SMP name from his chat?

He probably did that because it was funny.

But also because he didn't want people who don't respect a content creator's privacy/ humanity to be in his chat/ audience.

TL:DR,

Dream needs to set boundaries so that his fandom will respect him instead of turning him into some kind of God.

Also Schlatt is funny and says "no" to his audience all the goddamn time and nobody cares because they all respect him.

[sepyana]

Noir 2001 Ep. 11-18 Thoughs

This is around the time when Noir's plot starts to pick up.

Some general things first:

The sountrack of Noir is really damn good. I wanted to listen to is some more so I searched it up on Youtube. Turns out it's composed by Yuki Kajiura, which is a name I instantly recognized because she is responsible for the soundtrack of Madoka Magica, one of my favourite anime soundtracks ever. Explains the pmmm vibes I got for sure.

I will say though, she did improve between the osts. I like the Noir soundtrack a lot but there are a few janky bits the pmmm ost doesn't struggle with.

I had a lot of fun watching these episodes, the plot is interesting and the more "episodic" segments don't feel jarring to watch. I'm starting to like Kirika and Mireille a lot.

But the biggest reason for my interest is Chloe. I can't explain why, she doesn't get to do much yet. I dunno, she is just really charming to me.

Onto the episode by episode notes:

Ep. 11

This episode sets up the whole grand retour plotline, we see Atlena is planning something that Soldats is not too happy about. Also we get to know more about the book the photocopies are coming from.

I really like Chloe, I like that we get to see a show of her wardrobe only for her to pick the same wack ass outfit every time. Also the fact that she asks Kirika if she can keep the fork. What a weird little critter honestly.

The whole time her and Kirika are talking all Mireille could think is "What the fuck are these kids doing". She ends up giving in in the end.

Ep. 12

This episode is a oddity in that Kirika and Mireille don't appear at all. It's just Chloe and Atlena. It's a nice episode, we get to see a little bit of their dynamic. She does seem to care about her but Chloe might just be a tool for her too. It's a bit early to tell.

She is... I don't wanna say unmotivated but she is uninterested in the missions she is given. She cares about the integrity of it but she isn't interested in why she is given them. She isn't like "How dare you betray our organization bla bla"

Chloe's loyalties lie in Atlena only. She doesn't seem to care about Soldats, but she is interested in the Grand Retour, since the plan involves her.

Ep. 13

I wrote my thoughts in a seperate post like this:

I expected the painter to be one of Noir's targets or something because that's what happens with anyone who Kirika interacts positively with, thus why Mireille told her not to talk to him. But when he got shot I realized it was so he wouldn't get caught up in their mess and die. It's genuinely sad, you can tell at the end she is saying that from experience. Kirika was really happy to spend time with him, her face lights up. Something like picking up hobbies and making friends would mean a lot, especially to someone who doesn't have any idea who they are. Really nice episode overall

It was always present but after this episode you become on edge every time Mireille or Kirika i teract with a friend, expecting them to die. It does happen with George later on.

Ep. 14

There is some nice writing in this episode. Mireille denies her uncle could lie to her only for her to lie to him after. If she has things she would keep a secret surely her uncle must too.

There is definitely symbolism with the flowers but I am not smart enough to figure it out.

Ep. 15-16

Wild to me that Mireille and Kirika actually listened to Soldats. What if they hijack tour plane on your way to Vietnam or something? I don't think it's worth the risk.

The combat in this show is really lackluster. Maybe I am just not getting it. The henchmen are a joke, beating them is not fun to watch for me. And it drags on for so long too. I do like the shorter action sequences though.

It's funny that they say the poison the killer lady uses is "lethal to normal humans" and do not elaborate on that. Is she not human. What does this mean.

These episodes make me think Atlena does care for Chloe and isn't just putting on an act. Otherwise it makes no sense she would be fond of her in her inner dialogue and watch over her. She won't see that so why bother acting?

Ep. 17

The reveal that Mireille's parents were killed by Soldats was not surprising but I wasn't expexting them to be part of Soldats. We get to learn a lot about Mireille and Kirika's past but I don't have anything particularly interesting to say so I will skip that.

Apparently, her parents betrayed Soldats to protect her. But she had a brother didn't she, who got killed with her parents. Does that mean there is something special about Mireille?

Ep. 18

In every story with a duo protagonist there comes a time where the duo "breaks up". I wouldn't call this an arc since it's the span of an episode but yknow.

Losing my shit at crying Kirika she looks so much like the crying cat image here. How can you be so horrible to a face like that Mireille.

I get the sense Chloe doesn't give two shits about Mireille and only decided to tell Kirika about her because her dying would make Kirika upset. In a similar way to how Homura treats Sayaka, I guess. And she is right that it would make her upset. She is dependent on Mireille since she is the only person she actually knows. And I don't think Mireille realises that until the end.

The end of the episode was really cute. I am really starting to get attached to these two.

And that's the end! I decided to do a little sketch of Chloe at the end here for those who read this whole thing

There is a significant lack of Noir content and I want to change that so I might post some art on my art blog (^o^)v

[mythal-and-the-titans]

Time for a rant based on a post I read, about Dorian.

Dorian is gay. His character arc is abut that, among other things, but mostly about homophobia, trauma, abuse, acceptance.

He is also racist. He wouldn't think of himself that way of course. He doesn't think slavery is good, but it's also not that bad. Besides, not all slaves are elves, right? The fact that most of them are elves is just, well, inconvenient.

He is a gay man with racist values.

I have met many, many gay people who also happen to be racists. I have held a gay mans hand as he cried about how unfair it is that he's treated badly because of his attraction to men, something he didn't choose, it's just who he is, and then later hear him go off about arabs because he didn't like that the new neighbors "ruined the neighborhood". (They went for a walk outside his house and he didn't like that he could see "immigrants" from his window.) It makes no sense of course, but to be part of an opressed group isn't a vaccine against asshattery.

So, about Dorian. Or about any character, in any sort of media, but right now, about Dorian. He is a character. He is not a real person, but he could be, because there are many people like him. He is a character that many people like, but then he has this very awful trait where he kinda defends slavery. That's not something you can just accept. But you like him! Oh Lord! This won't do! Someone is at fault. It must be the writers. They wrote him badly. Why would they make you like a character who has traits that you associate with bad people? They must think it's good to be racist! If it was another character with other hypocritical beliefs, perhaps we could blame the fandom for making him seem more likeable than he truly is. Anything to avoid the truth:

Characters are part of a plot. They aren't seperate from it. The story doesn't exist without characters. A well-written character brings something new to the table. (Or something old, perhaps, but they can't be ignored.) They aren't people. They represent people and ideas. Dorian represents breaking free from tradition. He is heterodox, rebellious, loud and (seemingly) proud. He is also stuck in his old ways. He loves tradition, as long as said tradition doesn't hurt him. That's fair. Unfortunately, quite a lot of traditions that don't hurt him happen to hurt other people, and this doesn't seem to bother him much.

It's MEANT to make you uncomfortable! Because if you haven't met someone you like who also happen to be a really not that good person sometimes, you haven't met a lot of people, or you are that person. (We will all be that person at some point, that's life, and growth is a fantastic thing baby!) You will meet people who seem amazing, until suddenly they say or do something so far from what you consider right that you won't know what to do. If the first time this happens to you is while you're engaging with a made up story, congratulations. You now have the opportunity to sit with the feeling and really feel it, think about it, be frustrated about it. Because the person that did this to you is just a story. It's not someone you have to work with every day, or a close friend, or a partner, or a family member. If you don't know how to deal with it, you can just pretend it never happened, which is what a lot of people do irl. Sometimes that's the only thing to do, but a lot of times we're afraid of the consequences of speaking up, and many times we're just confused (cognitive dissonance). If you speak up, they might change, or not, but the traits that made you like them will still be there. They will still be cute or funny or helpful or whatever, while also being hateful and mean and rude. You won't stop liking the good things about them, but you can choose to distance yourself from them if you like. It will probably hurt.

Dorian is a good man and a bad man at the same time. He is contradictory. He is a reminder that all of us have biases, that freedom should be for everyone and not just ourselves, and that we're all just one cultural shock away from discovering that our belief system is fucked up. He is also well written because you couldn't pay me to write this at 3 am unless I was bursting with thoughts about this character. I have so many more thing to say about the theme of his story and how well it fits the story about Thedas and all its conflicts but we don't got time for that!

[ferret-does-stuff]

So in case you haven't heard, there's a really good Fangan that's been dropping episodes every weekend called Danganronpa: (He)Artless Deceit. It's only got 4 episodes, each around 20-30 minutes but so far it's been an incredible experience. Below the cut are my opinions on the characters based on introductions and predictions for their possible role in the story. I may make a seperate post for theories on the mastermind when the prologue is completed. Spoilers below!!

So first let's cover our protagonist, the Ultimate Rizzler herself, Akira Hayasaka. Firstly, I absolutely love that she has such a distinct, vivid personality that really contrasts her against other protagonists. Also, her double talent is interesting, especially seeing as one is so dangerous and criminal. I think she'll end up having some kind of solidarity with Kyouran as they have criminal talents and I think she's set up to foil Izanami, as Akira's talent and Izanami's beliefs conflict. I absolutely adore her interactions with Tomoya, they're such a funny duo.

Speaking of Tomoya, he's definitely in my top five favourite characters. He's just so funny, his sprites are over the top and you just can't help but love him despite his huge ego. I've seen theories that he and Shion switched talents, which actually sounds pretty plausible, as I'd imagine an Ultimate Therapist to avoid huge conflicts with others. If you ask me, it sounds like he needs to be recieving therapy more than administering it. Either way, it's fun to bully him.

Rei Fukuno is such an interesting character, I would've expected her to be an easy target given her blindness but her personality definitely shows that she'd be more likely to be a culprit than a victim, after all who'd suspect the small, weak blind girl with a useful talent that has potential to be used against the cast?

I don't have particularly strong feelings for Takeshi? It may be that his design doesn't appeal much to me, but his personality depicted in the wiki makes me like him a little more. I hope to see more of that caring side of him.

Otome is a character I sympathise with, I know how easy it can be to lose your temper and act irrationally grumpy when you're tired. I predict that she'll be an early death, I think a manga artist's execution would be cool to see though, so hoping for culprit. Now that she doesn't have to worry about deadlines, I can see her chilling out and coming out of her shell throughout the story.

I absolutely LOVE Itsumi, her design, her personality it's just... whhdiwjwhw. I feel so bad for her, dealing with nasty comments from strangers. If she dies I will ugly cry hard on the cold hard floor. Also, where can I get that hoodie??? I want one so bad.

Satoru is so suspiscious but I can't help but love him. He's just like me fr honestly. Given his wiki bio, he seems to be an entertaining person to listen to, so I think he'll hold some sway in the trials. Plus, if you've watched the trailers you'd know that he has one of the famous "unhinged" sprites. I think he has potential for a bigger role later on.

Honestly Shion is so cute and I love her personality. I think there'll be tension between the twins as I think their parents are divorced? Either way I think she has a higher possibility of dying than Tomoya.

I absolutely love Kiyoshi, he's so cute and I love the puppets. As much as I want him to survive, I think an Ultimate Puppeteer execution would be amazing and I would cry if he died. Like a lot of other people I believe that he might be trans, which may be why he dislikes his feminine appearance. If he is, it will probably play a part in the story, perhaps in a motive like the secret one?

Katsuhiko is such a fun character, sure he's the "sensible" one but how easy to annoy personality will definitely lead to shennanigans, probably led by Hideyoshi.

I love delinquents who become better people, so I love Hideyoshi. I think he and Katsuhiko will become the new Ishimondo which probably means that they'll meet a grizzly fate. Either way, hope to see more of him.

Izanami is just so HgauwhshaiJJuHRauiwuw. She's so pretty and she looks like a fairytale princess???? I think she's already being set up to be an antagonist, she dislikes "sinners" and seems to be suspiscious of Akira already. I think she's going to be a culprit, possibly killing Kyouran as he's another character I imagine she'd dislike.

Speaking of, Kyouran is probably my favourite at the moment. I love Robin Hood style characters and there's definitely more to him than meets the eye. Plus, his design is super cool and he reminds me of a victorian era thief.

Chiemi is also another favourite of mine, I can't believe how cute and kind she is! I can definitely see her being best friends with everyone, I see her as a middle game victim, maybe chapter 3? I think her optimism will eventually lead to her death.

I'm gonna be honest, I don't like Yumeo. I thought I would, but I like cold characters, not rude ones. The way he treated Tomoya was terrible. I may eventually come to like him after development but so far, nope.

Chou is the last one I think, and I love her too! I think her nad temper will definitely lead to her being an early culprit. I think she's super interesting!

[team-chris-is-really-x4-hot]

Hello everyone! Sorry for the lack of your funny slop. I've just been a little busy with a lot of stuff at the moment, so I haven't really hat the time to think up some extra funny Team Chris jokes (Aside from Owen shitting half his body weight, but I'm sure you didn't follow me for shit jokes). Let me be clear, still loving Total Drama (We stan the Nizzy brain rot) but, like I said, my funny juices aren't flowing at the moment... That sounds bad. Also, here's some more Nizzy art, which I actually drew myself! Explains why it's so shit!

The next part of this post is a bit different. Yesterday, my father, brother and I decided to move a bunch of old stuff from our backyard shed. And I stumbled upon a rather interesting collection here! Here we have my childhood Take Along Thomas collection!

Of course, it's not perfect. I'm missing several items. Edward, Bill and Ben, Harold and Clarabel. (I have two Annie's but no Clarabels.. Bullshit) Just to name a few. Also, a good few are worse for ware. Gordon, Henry, Duck, Daisy and Rusty.

Low-key, kind of thinking about getting back into collecting some of this stuff. Already got myself a Edward (New in the box too!) and I'm wanting to get myself a few other items along the way! So, perhaps, if you lot are okay with it, I might make this also a collection update blog of sorts. Where I talk about these toy trains! That or I make a seperate blog tehe.

Please, do let me know!

[liminalkandlez]

well, hello!

wanted to make an actual personal blog since what was supposed to be my one and only blog didn't feel all that personal to me, so here we are. introduction and the like under the cut!

[NOTE: WE'RE REDOING OUR PINNED EVENTUALLY]

(hi i'm sneaking this in here hoping no one notices erm we are a system. this is the host. a while ago we made the collective decision not to be too open about it unless we're comfortable with people but like. fuck it this is LITERALLY our personal blog. can't wait to get yelled at by my headmates 😁... uh. might make a section for system stuff eventually if i don't get yelled at LOL) (update yeah we're gonna make smthin seperate and link it here instead of this thing... we would make a carrd but!!! how the fuck do we work those. what)

hiii (this is the host still), i go by like, a ton of names, and i don't feel like listing every single one, but the most preferred ones right now are rex, kel or mack! i use they/he pronouns plus a lot of neos that i might actually list at another time.

i draw and write like, a ton, so expect some of that if i remember to post (unlikely)! i roleplay a lot too, and i'd love to find more roleplay partners!!! if you spot any fandoms that we have in common, since i primarily do fandom roleplay, you can message me!!!

also, do note that we are bodily 16.

current fixations of ours are OMORI, Incredibox, Rain World, Warrior Cats, Wii Deleted You, and Project Moon Games.

current project(s): Tragibox Retake (over 100k... CLAWING AT THE WALLS) , Evadare AU, Fungibox, Liminalbox... a lot more things. help.

oh also, these are important since these are our tags for this blog, so they're getting put here. hooray

🌟: constellations_chatter -> general posts.

🌟: moonlight_friends -> chats with moots or anons that'd came around a couple times already.

🌟: starfall_vent -> general vents. yeah. i don't think i need to say much more.

🌟: sun_love -> comfort character stuff.

🌟: bleedingmoon_trigger -> any post with general triggers. said general triggers are mentioned in the second to last section.

🌟: liminal_art -> any art...

most of our writing and art rules are on my other blog, which will also be linked here instead of rules... we don't intend on logging back into that account for a while so uh!!!! please don't send requests over there!!! ignore the fandom list on there too it's probably like severely outdated

hosts sources;

(under construction...)

Evelin (The Mandela Catalogue)

Bandu (Dave & Bambi)

Susie (Deltarune)

Skyblue (Skyverse)

Kel (OMORI)

Dante (Project Moon Games)

Angelica (Project Moon Games)

Rui (Project Sekai)

Cinderpelt/Cinderheart (Warrior Cats)

Teruko (DRDT)

Mack (Incredibox Tragibox)

and finally, a DNI list. because we kind of need one of those.

DNI;

Proship/Comship/etc, get the fuck out. as someone who had experienced abuse and all, seeing the romanticization of it is fucking disgusting to us.

Zoophiles. Out. You are not apart of the LGBTQ+ community and never will be.

If you intend to make fun of Selfshipping or fakeclaim. tbf, we don't care!!!! speak your shit i guess!!!! if you want to talk to a wall, then be my guest

anything triggering will be tagged. although we will only be tagging the general sensitive topics, like; blood/gore, yandere/obsessive, vent/vent fic, s/h, etc ; although if you want a particular thing tagged, tell us what that thing is and tell me what name you want used so we can make a tag that's like "(Your name) don't look", just to make it easier on us.

speaking of as well, if you are my mutual, i'd prefer you tag things regarding SA/r*pe, p$d*philia, and NSFW in general aside from jokes to be tagged with "Rex don't look". things may be added at a later time. (again, jokes are 100% fine!!! i find them funny, as long as they aren't like... super explicit)

User Boxes will go here eventually because I like them and think they're neat but uh. later. don't feel like grabbing em rn LMAO (edit: it's been weeks and i still haven't done it lmfao😭) (edit 2: MONTHS.)

[non-bee-knees]

SOOOOOO

I finished Rise! (And the movie)

Holy heavens what a show omg I can't believe I didn't find it sooner, I feel bad for past me who doesn't have it yet because WOW

I have never gotten attached to a character as fast as I have with Donnie; by the end of the first episode I had decided that if anything happened to him, I'd throw hands. 

All four of them (and April) are so fantastically written it's amazing I can't even muster the words to explain it.

Coming away from it, I have but One Question:

ARE RAPH AND DONNIE OKAY?!?"!?! Seriously, like????? We see both of them, at two seperate points in the show EACH (with some more Raph in the Movie) struggle with self worth. 

In Raph, his worth and doubts are because he feels he can't protect his family well enough, and it's crushing him, to the point where it manifests as Panic and Anger (which as someone who stuggles with keeping cool when angry, it's scary, how easily it could be to snap and hurt someone). I think that Raph's issues with worth are part of the reason Leo is now the leader; to try take some of the weight off Raph's shoulders (TOO BAD IT DIDN'T FUCKING WORK - que the entire movie)

In Donnie, his worth and doubt boil down to thinking he's replaceable. Personally, I think this comes mostly down to his Autism, and more so his brother's (and Dad) not entirely getting it. Sure we see that they understand to a point; they know he's weird with touch, and they never seem annoyed at his stimming, and it's only really Leo who get's annoyed at his Info-Dumping (aside from that one really funny clip from the fish episode - you know the one). Other than that though, I don't think they quiet get it, which is fair enough (I might make another post going more into this because it means a lot to me). ANYWAYS they're constantly joking in ways that always leans on Donnie being the odd one out, and whether they know it or not, it's hurting him. And it's built to worrying about whether he's useful or not. And yes, we get that fantastic April scene in 'Donnie V.s Witch Town' but one pep talk isn't gonna fix everything ( as someone who also struggles with worrying if I'm worth it, same. I'm constantly doubting myself, even despite the self-confidence I've built up recently)

This is long and I've semi forgot where I was going with it

BUT if we get a season 3 (praying, dear god, that we do) I want a Raph and Donnie episode. I don't think we got one that was just the two of them, we saw a lot more Donnie and Mikey adventures than the others (love their duo, so I'm not complaining). I want an episode, after the fact of everything that's happened, Movie and all, where we see Raph struggling more than ever to let go a bit more, especially after being used like that in the Movie - man's is probably terrified of himself. And I want to see Donnie struggling with grasping everything that happened (coming back to me here, woo, when big thing's happen, it's usually in the moment, or not til a long time later that they kinda settle into place; when my grandad died, I wasn't upset at the time, even though I understood why everyone else was. It wasn't until a year or so later that I sort of grieved). I sort of want to see Donnie do the same. It's sorta reenforced time and time again that Donnie is writen as low empathy, so let's see it. Let's see him unsure what to do when everything clicks into place and he doesn't know what to do, because 'Donnie doesn't feel things, why is he feeling things?!' 

I want to see the two oldest lean on each other as Leo and Mikey become more and more themselves, Leo with growing leadership skills, Mikey with his magic, and Donnie and Raph are able to sit back for a minute (but to them it feels like they're being put aside) and they learn to deal with it together. It wouldn't have to be a long episode, but I think it would be nice none the less.

Jesus this was long. SOzzles 😅

[illogarithmil]

Often I look at how Productive people are on here and get a bit distressed because I feel very ineffectual by comparison, so as a form of self-care I decided to go and list all my ongoing projects to remind myself that I'm *not* ineffectual, just sometimes inefficient.

Creative projects I presently have ongoing in addition to two seperate bits of academic/social research:

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 4th Ed campaign, monthly

Mongoose Traveller 2e campaign, monthlyish

Narrative Warhammer Fantasy Battles campaign using a unique campaign system which I designed and am playtesting for general release in the process

Reading a book every week for an entire year

Designing a massive modular homebrew RPG and low-fantasy setting for it that all my RPG friends and I will be able to play in for the rest of our lives once I'm out of uni and have time and energy to run campaigns again (*please ignore the above, they don't count because reasons*), including detailed climate maps, a table of fictional cultures presently 70 pages long and a setttinh map that'll be about two metres wide when completed

Reading every single product in the TTRPGS for Trans Rights in Florida bundle (link, by the way) - might do a review of the ones I like when I'm done, I'm getting close now!

Projects I want to start soon:

A third revision of my TTRPG Candlelight, designed for telling narrative fantasy stories the way I like to tell them. Probably too much of a heartbreaker to release to the public, but the second version is really good for what it is and just aching to be reworked based on what I've learned about game design in the last third of a year (mostly from the aforementioned bundle-reading)

Making a hack of Vampire: the Masquerade that makes it a sword and Sorcery RPG with Greek Epic tinges, because A) it would be funny and B) I actually think it would work shockingly well with minimal rules changes

Designing a lot of homebrew rules for Warhammer Fantasy: other human nations based on actual cool setting lore rather than the random stereotype mashup of Matthias Eliasson's Warhammer Armies Project and rules for raising armies in a way unique to each faction and for incorporating the strategic and operational level into your games

Projects I am actively preparing to start:

Second game of a FIST two-shot about hunting down psychic vampire demon summoning nazi occultist undead Northern Irish loyalist paramilitary child kidnappers and tarot card thieves

Vampire the Masquerade/Mage the Ascension two shot in which a group of vampiric elders make a huge fucking mess whilst trying to clear out some local anarchs and the Technocracy gets sent in to fix it.

Projects I technically am working on but are staring at me accusatorially at the moment as they perch on the edge of the abyss of forgetfulness:

Drawing a fairly complex encounter map of a coastal cove for use in some rpg or another some day

Designing a TTRPG about vikings and nominative determinism (it's called In Search of a Name, I've posted about it on here before a bit and I still really like it conceptually but it's maybe a bit narrow given I'm not actually a huge viking fan so I think the concepts might get cannibalised into other things)

Going through every trope on TVtropes to construct a fake TVtropes page for an old D&D game which I really loved (I had read half of all trope pages on TVtropes when I last updated it a month or so ago, over the course of about nine months)

Projects recently resurrected from that abyss and eager to regrow:

AYUG, a Skirmish wargame with cards I designed with some friends a couple of years back about battles between collections of weird philosophical devotees fighting for their beliefs in spaces that literally shift to represent those beliefs, featuring hypercapitalist fairies, an army of boltzmann brains and a faction whose major mechanic was probing socratic dialogue that made your opponent give up their beliefs and go home. We all loved this game, I wrote a load of lore for it and I have no idea why we stopped.

Memories of the Light, a system designed to port traveller-style lifepath mechanics into 20th Anniversary World of Darkness

The Dragons of Čachtice, a Vampire the Masquerade... supplement? I guess? about a tradition of ghouls linked to Erszebet Bathori (Elizabeth Bathory) who bathed in the blood of vampires to gain the powers of a ghoul without thr bond.

Would you look at that? I feel (marginally) less useless. My therapist will be so happy that I'm Challenging Negative Self-Talk™. Apologies if I've now become part of the problem that originally sent me down this road... moral of the story is, though, I guess that if you feel like you're not finishing anything it might just be that you're splitting your energies a lot, and that's fine and cool and good too and probably makes you a more interesting person - certainly more interesting to me!

And if you are just ultra-focussed and productive, please consider the impact your actions have on others and become horribly distractable instead /j <3

[felinedetached]

Fandom Ableism in the MCYT Community

[Edited 14 June 2021]

One thing I’ve noticed about the MCYT (Dream SMP, specifically) community on both Tumblr and Twitter is that when informed of things that are ableist, or harmful to ND people, a lot of people ignore the post/tweet, derail it or actively fight against it.

“I’m ND so I can’t be ableist” is a common statement, which is blatantly untrue. Even I’ve used ableist terms and phrases before, without realising they were harmful. So as a neurodivergent person, with autism, BPD, depression/anxiety, dyslexia, psychosis & brain damage*: here’s some common ableist things both CCs and fandom say almost constantly**.

*note that not every neurodivergent person will agree with me on these, but these are commonly ableist things people have previously talked about online, and/or have been discussed between me and other neurodivergent friends. No minority can ever speak for the entire group.

**note that a lot of these are common outside the MCYT community as well, and that some of these are just considered societally acceptable. This isn’t okay, but it explains why a lot of people don’t recognise jokes or comments like these are wrong, and it means that it’s not a direct moral failing of people that they don’t immediately or directly recognise these comments as wrong.

Now, let’s get into the things you might not have realised are potentially ableist:

1. Use of “Psychopath/Psycho/Sociopath/Schizo” and other demeaning terms for people with mental illnesses as insults, or to describe characters who are considered villainous. Psychopath/Psycho/Sociopath are already terms that people with ASPD dislike using, even not as an insult, but using these terms to describe people or characters who you disagree with or see as villainous only contributes to the villainisation of people with ASPD and other mental illnesses. Using c!Dream as an example: Dream as a character is not confirmed to have any of these mental illnesses. He is, however, commonly labeled as psychotic/psychopathic, incapable of any kind of compassion.

He is also a character that fandom largely insists that nobody is allowed to sympathise with. This is a huge issue, and has hurt a lot of people, especially people with low empathy, or mental illnesses that cause them to relate to some of c!Dream’s actions (e.g. pulling away from all his friends, desperately grasping at straws to gain control of situations etc). Insisting that these characters are characters it’s impossible to sympathise with, all while calling them psychotic/psychopathic/sociopathic, is extremely harmful, and I hope this post draws attention to that.

Here’s another post that talks about that.

2. Use of the term “freak”, in general. As an insult, “freak” has been typically used to insult neurodivergent people, people with visible physical disabilities (ex. “freakshow”, and the term was reportedly created with the intent of insulting people with physical disabilities), or people who display any kind of abnormal/atypical social behaviour/physical aspects — people who are usually ND people who lack a diagnosis or people with physical disabilities. Recent usage has come to mean “people who do things that hurt other people”, but this is harmful as well; using words like “freak” or “weirdo” which mean “socially atypical behaviour” to refer to people who are actually doing things that hurt other people conflates the two, and often has a side effect of hurting disabled people who see it.

3. Calling ND ccs like Technoblade monotone/emotionless. While the term “monotone” isn’t ableist in and of itself, the fact that it’s being used against a neurodivergent man who emotes in a different way to neurotypical people rubs a lot of ND people the wrong way. I’ve partially discussed this here, in a tweet responding to a person who said that c!Technoblade, quote, “has no human capabilities like emotion for example”. This, however, is not something contained to c!Technoblade — one of the most common jokes in this fandom is how rare it is to hear emotion in Technoblade’s voice.

The issue with that is that neurodivergent people almost universally agree that Technoblade emotes perfectly fine, and, in fact, emotes more freely and clearly than a lot of others do. Hence, calling him monotone perpetuates the idea of ND people as emotionless/less able to be hurt/less expressive, which often hurts us. It also contributes to the dehumanisation of ND people — related to how ND symptoms are most often seen in robots or monsters in shows — and is generally extremely harmful, on top of being untrue.

4. Related to point 3: the infantilisation of ND ccs like Tubbo and Dream, usually paired with assigning “caretakers” of their friends, like Tommy and George. This is about the posts that spread like “omg, Tommy helps Tubbo with his dyslexia, that’s so cute” or “omg George is so patient with Dream, I could never sit through that” on videos of Dream vocally stimming because of his ADHD. This is another post that talks about this, but I wanted to talk more about why this is harmful here.

4a) With Tubbo’s dyslexia, from someone with dyslexia, it isn’t harmful to correct his spelling and move on. Personally, I think this is helpful — others will think it’s condescending, because not all ND people are the same — but as the above linked post mentions, this is not what Tubbo’s twitch chat does. This is not what the comments say. It’s all things about how it’s “so cute” that Tubbo can’t spell, how Tommy/Ranboo are “so patient” with correcting him. This is rooted in the need to constantly watch over ND people while acting like we can't live our lives without someone having us under constant vigilance. It feels like savior-complex ableism, like people are trying so hard to not be ableist that they spin back around to hurting us instead. And it feels like we are being treated like children. Like we are lesser than, and need to be monitored/watched over.

4b) Similarly to what people do with Tubbo, the comments on posts about Dream’s vocal stimming are often full of people calling George “patient” for “dealing with it”, or claiming they “wouldn’t be able to handle it”. This is inherently ableist. They’re praising George for basic human decency towards ND people, and claiming in the same breath that they wouldn’t be able to do that themselves. And then there’s these.

These comments infantilise Dream — claiming he “wouldn’t be able to stop/calm down” without George’s help, implying he’d “spiral out of control” or claiming “everyone is now my child”. It’s all related to the infantilisation of ND people, and the belief that without help/a caretaker we cannot take care of ourselves.

5. The way people treat ccs who likely have undiagnosed neurodivergencies, like Wilbur. Wilbur has openly admitted on stream before that his parents considered getting him an autism diagnosis. He also openly admits on stream that he has habits he doesn’t understand why he does, and hyperfixates on things for months at a time and doesn’t know why. Posts like this have gone around Tumblr, in which Wilbur displays blatantly ND traits.

And fandom generally calls him weird for expressing those traits. This video where he talks about eating sand because he likes the texture? That’s an ND trait. This video where he talks about his irrational hatred for anteaters? While mostly a joke, irrational hatred of something when you can’t explain/understand/articulate why is also a common ND trait. He spends 20 minutes during a Philza stream info-dumping about self-sustaining ecosystems (sharing the photo, because I think it’s really cool) and fandom begins calling them “Wilbur’s weird jars”. It’s demeaning to people who infodump, and as a ND person who hyperfixates and infodumps it’s really upsetting to see. It’s also upsetting to see other ND traits being called “weird” or “freaky” & made out to be soley some funny joke for NT people to laugh at us about.

Additionally: It’s strange to me that people think it’s okay to make fun of ND traits just because they know that or perceive that the person they’re making fun of is NT. It’s still making fun of ND traits. It’s still insulting ND people. It’s still ableist as hell. Why is it okay just because the person is NT?

6. Implying that c!Ranboo’s enderwalking is inherently violent. Ranboo has shown us time and time again that the enderwalk state isn’t a violent state. That the enderwalk state isn’t a seperate version of c!Ranboo that does horrific things. Why, then, is it so common to imply that Ranboo would be violent and hurt people why he’s enderwalking?

It comes back to the perception of c!Ranboo as a character with “two halves”, or as a character with DID. Ranboo has made it clear that his character does not have DID, but this headcanon about his character persists, and it persists in a way that is directly harmful to people with DID — and to people who dissociate or sleepwalk. We do not commit horrific acts while we dissociate, while we’re sleepwalking, because the majority of the time we’re just checked out, our body is on autopilot. Insinuating that we do is harmful. Insinuating that Ranboo has “another half” that’s inherently violent or evil is harmful to people with DID. I’m not going to ask you to stop writing these headcanons etc, but please consider the effect you have on people before you do.

7. Related to point 6: the perception of c!Ranboo as “soft” and “cute” and/or perfectly moral because of his canonical anxiety. This is really harmful, and comes once again from the infantilisation of disorders like anxiety and depression. Ranboo has made clear time and time again that his character isn’t moral, and in fact is extremely inconsistent. He’s portrayed his character as inconsistent, as someone who hurts his friends unintentionally and often due to his want to please everyone, and yet he’s constantly seen as “soft/pure/the only moral one” because of his anxiety causing to have repeated and consistent spirals on-screen. These spirals are not healthy. They don’t indicate his “perfect morals” or make him more moral than anyone else on the SMP. Please stop infantilising people with anxiety, it’s really hurtful.

8. Implying that c!Technoblade is inherently a violent person because of his voices. I’ll admit here: my hallucinations are visual. I do not get auditory hallucinations, and I cannot speak for people who do. But many people have spoken out about this, and discussed how talking about Technoblade as an inherently violent character because of his voices is harmful, and a stereotype of people with schizophrenia.

Technoblade’s character is, in and of itself, inherently a stereotype (despite the fact that his chat are more likely to be a supernatural entity than a symptom of a disorder such as schizophrenia) in that the idea of “hearing voices that encourage violence” is a stereotype of people with schizophrenia. As an actual symptom, is a very uncommon one. More common auditory hallucinations for people with schizophrenia or psychosis are, reportedly, whispers or unrelated conversation. One of my friends hears screaming.

But the issue is with the implication that c!Technoblade is “driven to violence” by the voices. Canonically, he has dealt with the “bloodlust” of chat by grinding withers. He’s perfectly capable of being peaceful, even with “voices pushing for violence”, and he’s perfectly capable of being violent without the “voices” influence. It’s the connotations and the history that fandom has in demonising and villainising c!Technoblade for even having the “voices” in the first place, and acting having them makes him inherently violent and unstable. There’s precedent for that already in society, and it’s not okay to perpetuate it.

[Edit: as of 22/05/2021, I do experience auditory hallucinations, and I can confirm that I am not any more violent, and the voices I hear don’t push me to violence. The clearest one just said ‘click’ in my ear.]

9. Jokes about brain damage and the use of “brainrot” as a term. I made a post about how common jokes about brain damage are here, and I would like to reiterate bits of it.

Jokes like these are really really normalized in modern society. I’m sure a lot of you didn’t even register it as wrong, and that isn’t a moral failing! It’s a norm in society, and that means the majority of people arent going to register it as something hurtful, because it’s said so often. But it does still hurt. The idea of using a disability as an insult is really harmful and it feels dehumanizing, like our disability makes us lesser, something that should be laughed at.

“Brainrot” as a term originated in Skyrim, as a disease that literally rotted your brain. However, as a term, it has very similar connotations to “brain damaged” and has been used in similarly joking and insulting ways. It’s something that feels really off to me and other neurodivergent people to see used by neurotypical people. It even sometimes feels uncomfortable when used by neurodivergent people, even if it’s used in positive ways. I know quite a few people who have removed it from their vocab completely because of the connotations, and I have personally done the same. Once again, I am just asking you to please consider your words before you use them.

10. Calling c!Wilbur during his Pogtopia Arc “Vilbur”. Yes, he was a villain. Yes, he hurt people. But c!Wilbur during the Pogtopia Arc only has one major difference from c!Wilbur during the L’Manburg Arc: a visible depiction of mental illness, specifically paranoia and psychosis. Treating him as a seperate person and calling that seperate person “Vilbur” comes across as extremely hurtful, and contributes to the villainisation of mentally ill people. His mental illness does not excuse him from hurting people, but calling c!Wilbur “Vilbur” upsets a lot of us, because wether or not it’s intended, it feels reductive, hurtful, and insulting.

If you got to the end of this post, thank you so much for reading. I hope that this helped you recognise things that you might not have known were ableist, and that you consider what I’ve said here. I also know that I haven’t addressed everything ableist that’s spread through the MCYT fandom community, so if you’re ND and have something you’d like to add, please feel free.

[emilysshortstories]

Paul Lahote Part 2

Don’t really know what to call this, but thanks for all the love on the last part. I’m gonna try and post weekly but I work a lot so no promises.

Warnings: Angst, lots of it. cussing, hints towards abuse.

After a few weeks went by things seemed to work themselves out between Jacob and Bella. I would drive out to Emily’s about once a week, Paul conveniently never being there. Which I was actually kinda glad about, although I felt eager to be around him, Jared told me about his anger issues so I think it’s better for me to steer clear of him until this eagerness goes away. Anger issues scare me. 

Jared and I have gotten close through these visits, always laughing at each other's sarcastic jokes and ending the night with an episode of New Girl. That was usually the time when everyone else bailed but I didn’t care, it gave Jared and I some hilarious inside jokes. No matter how close we got, our feelings for each other never grew past platonic, though I would rarely catch Sam giving Jared a look. It was never all knowing “when are you going to ask her out?” look, more of a “back off” look. But that could just be me reading into it too much, there is nothing. I am thinking too much. I’m just happy I finally made a friend of my own. 

One day when I arrived at Emily’s for dinner, there was a new face in the crowd. “Y/N! You’re here!” said Emily as I walked in. “Hey! This is for you. It’s a cake for later” I said, handing her the grocery bag in my hands. “Thank you, you didn’t have to do that. This is Seth, Harry’s son.” Emily pointed to the unfamiliar face. “Hi, I’m Y/N, Charlie Swan’s niece.” I introduced myself, but Seth just kind of stared at me, never saying a word. Jared’s laughing was what broke the silence. “What are you laughing at dick nose?” I asked, hoping not to embarrass Seth. “Nothing, just your ability to woo people” 

“Very funny, I don’t woo anyone, you’re imagining things. How Emily puts up with you is beyond me.”

“IT’S NOT WITHOUT GREAT DIFFICULTY” Emily yelled from the kitchen before walking towards us. “Paul isn’t going to show up again?” she added.

“Nope” Embry said “ Too stubborn for his own good, the dumbass”

“Hey, if he doesn’t want to meet me that’s fine. It’s none of my business.” I say, hoping to ease Emily’s thoughts, seeming it always bothers her when he doesn’t show up. 

We all seemed to move past it and dinner was great, as usual. “Hey, instead of New Girl do you want to take a walk? I’ll show you the hiking trails around here.” Jared asked me.

“Sounds great” I said with a smile.

“Can I join you guys?” Seth asks like a small child which made me have to suppress a giggle. Poor boy had been staring at me all night like a lost puppy, he was cute no doubt, but being 5 years younger than me was a deal breaker. 

“No, Jared has something important to explain to her. Remember?” Sam said like he was Seth’s father. He seemed to always be incharge of everything around these guys so that didn’t surprise me. I definitely wouldn’t call them a cult, but club would be a better term, seeming as a hierarchy was apparent. 

“Seth likes you” Jared said as soon as we walked out of the house. “Wow! Way to out your friend there! Remind me to never trust you with a secret. Plus you don’t know that for certain, he just met me.” I said and Jared laughed, but didn’t say anything back. No until we were pretty deep into the woods did I ask “So what is this thing Sam said you needed to show me?” 

“Well I wanted to try and explain it to you but I have a feeling you wouldn’t believe me.”

“Your sarcasm levels are like no other to be fair, so show me.”

“Ok” he said and stopped walking. “Just brace yourself and try not to panic. I promise I won’t hurt you ok?”

“Ok” I say, trying to do what he said.

I watched. Watched him take off his shoes. Watched him back up a few feet. Watched him start to shake. Just like Paul did that day Bella slapped him. Then I watched him turn into a wolf. I was stuck. Didn’t say or do anything. I couldn’t. Just continued to watch as this wolf trotted back into the woods. My brain was blank. No thoughts, words or actions came to mind. Everyone knows the fight or flight trauma responses, but not a lot of people talk about the third: freeze. 

Jared came back, this time a human. “You okay?”. I took a deep breath and said “I’m in need of explanation please” I remembered that he wasn’t going to hurt me. 

He explained the histories, Vampires, and why he spends most of his time with the “pack”. I listened, tried to take it all in and process the copious amounts of new information, but apparently I was too quiet for Jared. “Please say something” 

“I’m alright, surprised to say the least and will need some time to process everything. But I’m not mad I promise. Thank you for telling me everything.”

“Well, that actually is not all. We just figured it would be best to wait until you’re ok with this first.” 

“There is more? Please just tell me the rest, trust me, I process better with all the information.”

“Okay, well. We can hear each other's thoughts, we are 108 degrees, and we can imprint.”

“That’s why you never wear shirts… What’s imprinting?” 

“The best way I can describe it is soulmates. When we make eye contact with them, our whole world becomes this person and we will be and do anything for them. When we are apart it’s hell, getting rejected by an imprint can really fuck you up. Make you sick. No one has ever died from being seperated from an imprint but you might as well be.”

“That sounds intense. What does that have to do with me?” 

“Paul imprinted on you. And it scared him. Still does scare him because love was never something that he wanted. That’s why he won’t see you, he isn’t mad at you. He’s in love with you and his stubbornness is eating him alive. It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to listen to his obsessive thoughts all the time.” 

“Hold on. Paul is my soulmate but he doesn't want me?”

“No, he wants you. He needs you, but he’s scared. We thought if we told you, you could convince-”

“You want me to try and convince my soulmate that he should be with me?... Fuck that. You dump all this crap on me and then tell me my own fucking soulmate doesn’t want me?!”

As if on cue, Paul came out of the woods “What did you do to her Jared? You hurt her?!”

“How do you know I’m in pain?”

“We feel our imprints' pain too” Jared added. 

“Oh! Perfect! So you can feel what you are doing to me asshole!” I couldn’t help but yell at Paul, I was overwhelmed to say the least. I’d never been so angry in my whole life. 

“What?”

“Jared didn’t hurt me, You did! What? You thought that I would be all sweet and understanding?! Awe my own fucking soulmate doesn’t want me-”

“No it’s no like that-”

“What is it? Am I not as pretty as you thought I would be? Well I can guarantee that you were not what I had in mind either you prick! In fact you are the last person I ever wanted. Oh great! Another egotistical asshole with anger issues to make me feel like shit all the time! Let me just take off my shoes so you can sweep me off my feet properly! I’m happy you got some practice keeping your distance from me. Now keep doing it! And don’t you dare think, even for a second, that you have any sort of claim over me. I’m out of here!”

Frustrated tears flowed down my face like a waterfall while my heart felt like it had died in my stomach and air was coming into my lungs but not my head. 

“Please don’t go. I had no idea you would feel this way. I can’t be separated from you anymore, I’ll go insane-”

“GOOD! Now fuck off!” I got into my car and slammed my door before Paul ran up to me window “Ok ok you can leave, just please let me drive you home. You shouldn’t be driving like this, and it’s dark. I promise I won’t say a word. Let Jared drive you! Anything.”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” My own stubbornness got the best of me and I drove away. Only this time I was dumb enough to look in the mirror to see Paul sobbing.

[shiningstarlight101]

Empires season 2 theory hours after season 1 ended?? It's more likely then you think

Major season 1 finale spoilers!

I really apologize for not having a "read more" thing going on but i'm on my phone and i cannot for the life of me figure it out

So, what happens to the rulers in season 2? Will any stay? Idk that's why this is a theory. And also just some general thoughts on the endings here and there. This is for fun and based on almost 0 evidence, i can be 100% wrong on all of this lol

I do want to add a small warning that i'm assuming all 12 creators are in season 2. This could very well be wrong and probably is! Especially since some didn't state "empires will return" in their videos. I doubt all of them will stay around, it's normal for people to leave and join smp's.

-Jimmy

Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Jimmy comes into season 2 as the same character from season 1. He ran away from his home, it would be interesting to see him maybe try and prove himself since he tried to take a shortcut in being a ruler and paid the price for it.

-Lizzie

I don't know if Lizzie will be on season 2, her ending did feel more like a definite goodbye. I think Lizzie would be a new character, maybe a witch or something like that? Or they'll keep up the seablings dynamic and she lost her memories so Jimmy has to help. Side note: did anyone else watch lizzie's pov first?? Lizzie doesn't mention season 2 in her vid so i fully thought empires was over, period lol.

-Scott

Whole new character? Honestly it would be cool if Rivendell!Scott was like a seperate character from the Scott in season 1, since it seems his story is the one which is the most "yeah this is the end". Unless we get some necromancy up in here. Additional thing about his end: I cannot see it as sweet- a lot of people call it (and 3rd life) the happy ending but I always end up feeling bad because the ending is c!Scott's imagination at the end of the day, none of it is real. It's bittersweet

-Gem

I think it's clear wizard!Gem is a done deal, no more of that. Her end is literally an epilogue. Gonna be honest, I don't think she'll return. Since she has quite a few series on the side, including hc season 9 (i'm guessing she's in season 9 since season 8 was mostly just the filler season). It would be cool to see her as a new character tho!

-Katherine

Might return as her season 1 self, since her ending was simulair with Jimmy's. Just walking into the sunset. Again, probably wrong.

-Joel

I am expecting Joel to just be a new character entirely but it would also be very funny to see Joel, previous king of Mezelea, now in the wilderness forced to survive. The pure chaos of Mezelea!Joel stsrting from scratch, the man who had a giant ass palace

-Fwip

Honestly idk, I can see Fwip being his season 1 self. And I would probably go with that but with Gem ending wizard!Gem's story, I think that debunks that whole idea. They did leave together.

-Shubble

If anyone is likely to return as their season 1 characters, it's Shrub. It feels like Shrub's quest is finally beginning for her, she finally has a way to find home. I would honestly love for season 2 to be about her making a home in the nether, looking for her kingdom. Her family. Shrub deserves a happy ending

Now I will keep out Sausage, Joey, Pixl and Pearl because I just realised it is really late for me, and I honestly haven't watched their episodes yet. I don't want to force myself to watch their stuff and came back at this hour, so I'll make a follow up post tommorow 👌

Thank you for listening to 2am me losing my mind