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#my brain isn’t nice to myself a lot of the time
itspileofgoodthings · 5 months
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what I’m trying to say is that I need to trust that when I’m really doing something I care about and I have the right end/aim in mind a lot of the structural stuff, the how’s and the how-to’s will take care of themselves, or at least are better left to my more subconscious brain and that it’s good when I let myself go and overflow
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no1ryomafan · 5 months
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Thought about how given I’ve written so much for getter and rotate enough in my brain I could make hypothetical “how to write this characters” post if those even exists until I remember the factors of:
<the status of the tags doesn’t warrant a lot of writers as is and the only person to ask me this was a irl <I don’t wanna be gatekeepy even if I wouldn’t put my bias into it <who the fuck would it really be about besides ryoma and maybe hayato bc honest to god just grasping the team dynamic of the getter will make you be able to understand each individual pilot <I doubt myself I even write 100% in character despite what I’m told 💀
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passerinesoncaffeine · 6 months
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What is this problem and how do I fucking fix it.
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flutterby5 · 11 months
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#some days are so hard like I am very not okay a lot of the time these days but rn I’m actually okayish so I can’t put it into words#but like basically I’ve been have trouble sleeping recently and it’s only gotten worse…to the point where I’ve been waking up every single#night and it’s so hard to get my brain to be sleepy again and go back to sleep#and it’s ruining my life like being exhausted makes life sososo hard I’m miserable and everyone around me is laughing and lighthearted and#I just wallow in my own misery…like when I’m okay I’m okay but when I’m not I question everything#I should really just quit my job and focus on dealing with this chronic insomnia I have now but I’ve been trying different things and#nothing has stuck..part of me probably isn’t trying hard enough but how can I with a full time#job and the need to feed myself and chores and getting my mind of everything and trying to workout more like??#that’s why I need to quit but I am hesistant to move home like I don’t have to but still then I wouldn’t need to pay for rent yknow but I#I also kind of don’t want to move home bc it’s quite nice not to and for covid reasons bc I’m like the only one I know that still cares#about covid lmaooo but like there are definitely pros too like I’m glad I still have the option tbh#but I wish I could just sleep and didn’t have to fight my own brain every single night why can’t I just be normal like I know no one is#normal but also why does everyone else do such a good job hiding it while I just feel like I’m just bringing the mood down by struggling so#much..like also my dept so small rn and I actually do lie my coworkers they really already take a lot of weight comparatively and are#reliable that I feel bad idkkkk why can’t I just sleep like seriously. wtaf is wrong with me#random thoughts don’t mind me#I’m so fucking tired
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onelittlespiral · 9 months
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FML:Relax
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From the moment I arrived, I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb. I had come on vacation to kick back for a few days and get some action, but the resort had nearly no women and was instead populated with almost all men. They seemed like nice guys when I talked to them, certainly my kind of guys with how jacked they were. Or at least I thought so.
“Hey cutie, wanna come spend some time with daddy?”
“A newbie! Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle and sweet with you.”
“You looking to top or bottom?”
I realized I must have come on the Gay Days, and the men there were not shy about coming on to me. I tried to politely excuse myself whenever they turned the topic to sex. I spent a lot of time at the pool trying to just relax and have a good time, but it was starting to tick me off.
“Hey, I haven’t seen you here before.”
A man came and sat next to me. He was a scruffy guy, tanned and huge like most of the rest of them. The scent of sunscreen and BO rolled off him. His arms were wrapped in some nerdy tattoos but their size clearly showed he worked out hard. If he wasn’t here this week I would assume him to be a good pick for a gym bud.
“Yeah, first time. Didn’t realize I booked…uh…this week. Not really my scene.”
Something in his demeanor changed. It was hard to describe, but I felt a lot more at ease. He leaned over and began whisper to me,
“If I’m being honest. It isn’t much for me either. But fuck these gay guys know how to party. They’ve got just about anything you could want to take, and basically just pass the shit around. You ever actually tried poppers? I was fucked up bro.”
Maybe it was finally meeting another straight guy but I began relaxing.
He continued, “I got some stashed if you want to swing by and try some shit out.”
Maybe this vacation wouldn’t be such a wash.
I stopped by his room later that afternoon. He greeted me at the door and invited me in as he promised to show off the goods. The room was trashed. The floor was strewn with dirty shirts, shorts, and jockstraps. Shot glasses and beers were stuck to the tables. The bed was drenched in sweat. I stepped in and took a seat on the couch, cautions to avoid the mess. He sat down next to me.
“So, what have you got?”
“You now babe,” he said, throwing his arm in the air.
“Whaaaa…haaa” I started before my brain was afloat.
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I slowly leaned forward, drawn in by the thick musk that radiated from his pit. I tried to resist but soon my nose was pressed against it as his sweat filled my brain. I tried to pull back but he rested his arm against the back of my head, pinning me as my brain shut down on the fumes. It wasn’t long before my tongue lolled out of my mouth.
“There you go. Relax. Good boy.”
Good boy. It echoed in my brain, bouncing till it was the only thought left. I quivered in anticipation as I continued to drink in his scent and let his hair tickle my face.
“Yeah, lap it up big boy. This is right where you belong. It was designed just for you, to trap guys and help them fit in a bit more.”
What did he mean by that? But as he told me to lap it up, it was no longer good enough to just smell. I gave a hesitant lick. It only took one as his sweat swam across my mind. All functionality shut down as I worshipped that pit. As I did, I began to feel a change. Deep within an itch, a need developed. A need to be desired by this man… no. To be desired by men. Any who would have me. I felt a new power flow through me, a revitalized energy and strength. He pulled my dumbstruck face out of his pit and gave my hair a quick tousle. His hand glided down my cheek to my chin, and with a firm flick of his wrist pulled my lips to his. He pressed my face to his in a deep kiss as new memories filled my mind. Memories of long nights dancing and drinking at bars. Days working out getting shredded before hitting the sauna for some fun. Of pride parades and glitter in my beard. The longer he kissed me the more I felt myself grow completely comfortable in his arms. I belonged here, with all the hottest guys living it up for a week at the resort. I had been coming here for years to show off, party hard, and fuck into the early morning. My old self was being flushed away, leaking out of my cock, while the new personality filled in the gaps.
My body began to change where his hands brushed over my body. Arms swelled as biceps grew to mounds on my arms. Pecs hung heavy with muscle. Thighs and legs sent slow rips through my shorts until they had burst through, leaving my swelling cock to fight the jockstrap underneath. Feet inched across the floor as my toes curled from the strain. Every inch writhed beneath his touch. He pulled me back to inspect me.
“Damn you’re turning out well, some of my finest work.”
I mumbled in agreement, still stuck in a state of ecstasy as I felt new power surging through me. “Time to seal the deal.”
He slid his jock down, and the full force of his sweat and musk sent my brain swimming. I couldn’t resist as he slid his cock down my open throat, balls deep, and began face fucking me. As his bush filled my nostrils, pre slid down my throat in a steady stream. I felt warm all over, as a deep tan set in. I had come to this resort for years and loved sunbathing and showing off my muscles. The heat persisted, turning to a sweat, the sweat turning to a deep funk. It was the same smell invading my mind and body as he continued to thrust, deeper as my body adjusted to years of sucking men off. It felt like no surprise as a dusting of hair covered my pecs, then pushed down my stomach before my shaved down bush exploded. My pits filled in to better capture my own smell, and keep me just a little high on my own supply.
“Fuck yeah little bro, you’re gonna be so good out there.”
He slipped a hat over my head, and my mind filled with a new purpose. To kick back at this resort and fucking party. To feel pride in who I was and become one of the community. But, most importantly, to grow the tribe and bring more guys into the fold. I felt his cock tense in my mouth as my mind slowed down to accept my place as a gay god, to worship my bros and be worshiped. As thick ropes shot down my throat, I felt strong. I smelt rank. And I was fucking home.
The next day, a new guy showed up to the resort. Skinny, shy, out of place. I came over to talk with him.
“First time here, bro?”
“Yeah, not quite sure I belong.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. Throwing my arm behind my head. My musk caught his attention as his eyes began glazing over, “Why don’t I show you around?”
“Ye…yeah…yeah.”
“Don’t worry,” his face was soon resting in my pit, and I saw his muscles twitch with anticipation, “you’re gonna fit right in bro.”
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ruh--roh-raggy · 7 months
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Home Sweet Home (William Afton x Wife! Reader) - Pt. 1
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Hello hello! So, I'm fully insane about this man rn. I can't help it. The brain rot has taken over my life and here we are lol. I wanted to write something that really focuses on the domestic fluff side of Reader's life with William, of course there will be some smut thrown in there too because I simply can't help myself 😂😂 Reader and William have just bought their first house together. This story follows their week long escapade of unpacking, making their home perfect, and going down memory lane. Lots of super cute stuff, chapters containing smut will be updated with proper warnings. If you enjoy this story and would like to be added to the tag list, please let me know!
WARNINGS: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, MDNI, 18+ CONTENT AHEAD, smut marked with divider, age gap (reader in 30's William in 40's/50's), some swearing, face sitting, cockwarming, size kink, a singular (1) spank to readers ass, slightly dom! William, praise, Will just wants to give his wife some tender TLC after a long day of lugging boxes around (if I missed any please let me know!
You can find my Masterlist here!
Word Count: 3,538
Part 2
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“I want to paint the living room green, I think it would look nice with our couch.” William drove down the road, a soft smile on his face as he listened to you ramble on about all of your plans for their new house. Business at the pizzeria had skyrocketed, which meant that he could finally give his pretty little wife the front porch, white picket fence house of her dreams. You should be pulling in about a half hour before the moving truck is scheduled to arrive, allowing the two of you time to empty out his trunk. You stood at his side with a giddy smile on your face, William thumbing through his key ring to find the new shiny gold addition to his collection. He slides the key into the lock, chuckling at your excited squeals as he pushes the door open. He grabs you by the wrist, stopping you from running inside ahead of him.
“Isn’t there some old wives tale about carrying your wife over the threshold of a house?” He mumbles out the vague details he could remember. You nod, wrapping your arms around his neck with a giggle.
“It’s for good luck. Why? Do you want to carry me inside?” You smile coyly up at him.
“Well I’m not going to be the one bringing bad luck into our house.” He proclaims proudly, jabbing a finger into his chest. You let out a shriek as he scoops you up in his strong arms. You press a kiss to his scruffy cheek as you pass through the door. “Well, Mrs. Afton, welcome home.” He smiles down at you.
You spun around the empty living room floor, broom in hand as you did a quick sweep before the furniture got brought in. “Oh, Will, I'm so happy. Our own house.” You beam up at him. Your husband breathes out a chuckle, sweeping you up in his arms as he places a kiss to your forehead. Both of your attention was drawn to the windows as the moving truck rumbled into the driveway.
“Don't lift anything too heavy.” He orders with a firm point of his finger. “I hired movers so you don't have to struggle, if I see you doing too much you're going to be in big trouble later bunny.” You roll your eyes, wrapping your arms around him as you place a kiss to his chest.
“I promise I won't work too hard.” You fidget with the hem of his shirt. “I just want everything to be perfect.” You sigh with a slight shrug of your shoulders.
“I promise it will be, we have the whole week to get everything exactly how you want it.” He smiles, his thumb rubbing languidly across your waist. You excitedly threw open the front door, directing the movers inside before clamoring out to the truck yourself. William trailed after you, keeping a close eye on your excited figure. Your husband loved how passionate you were about everything you did, but you also had a tendency to overwork yourself. He sighs as he sees you struggling with a box, gently taking it from your hands and propping it against his hip. He glances around the trailer. “Here.” He nudges a box with his foot, one he had made a subtle marking on to signify it was one he packed light enough for you to easily carry. “Take that one, we’ll go put these in the bedroom.” He hops down from the back of the truck, taking your box from you and wrapping his hands around your waist to lower you safely to the ground. You practically skipped up the porch steps, scooting past the movers as you raced up to the master bedroom. Your mattress sat in the middle of the room. The white, sheetless bed was a stark contrast to the nearly black hardwood.
“We’ll need to go get a bed frame.” You sigh, setting down the box before collapsing on the mattress. William groans as he lays down by your side.
“I’m sure we’re going to have to get a lot of things.” He chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you to him. “We’ll take care of everything, doll, don’t worry.” You spent the rest of the afternoon sliding furniture around downstairs while the movers brought in the rest of the boxes. The sun had already set by the time everything was brought in. You collapsed onto the couch with a tired groan, finally kicking your shoes off as you sank into the worn leather of the cushions. William sits beside you, lifting your feet only to drop them back in his lap. You let out a pleased hum as you feel his strong hands knead into your aching muscles. “Day one is officially over.” The two of you exchange a sleepy high five. A soft smile spreads across your lips as you take a moment to look at your husband. His gold, wire framed aviators sitting low on his nose, his large calloused hands massaging your feet with the utmost care and delicacy. You were William’s entire world.
“Honey,” he perks up at your soft voice, calling out to him, “how about I throw something together for dinner so we can get to bed.”
“I don’t think we have any groceries bunny.” He rebuttals with a chuckle. “Are you up for a drive? We could go pick up some pizza.”
“But it’s so cold.” You pout.
“I’ll go grab you one of my coats, sweet girl.” He cups your cheek, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as he passes by you. You let out a soft hum as you buried your face into the soft fabric of your husband's coat, the comforting smell of his spicy, musky cologne, machine oil, and cigarettes filling your nose. He had an arm wrapped around your shoulder, allowing you to cuddle into his side as he drove up twisting back roads. The radio crackled softly, whatever song was playing was barely audible over the car's loud blower. You rested your hand on his thigh, William glancing down quickly, the sight of your wedding ring glinting in the soft light bringing a smile to his lips. He loved the fact that you were all his, his pretty wife, his little bunny. He loved how sweet and delicate you were. He had been hardened by years of working in his workshop and other strenuous jobs he had throughout his life, he barely registered this evening was brisk let alone cold. But he definitely wouldn't complain about you cuddling into his side for warmth, how your cheeks and the tip of your nose dusted pink from the chilly night air, how your fingers trembled as you tucked them under his thigh. He shuddered softly as you pressed your lips to his neck, the buzzing, yellow light from the pizza shop's sign illuminating the cab as you and your husband exchanged a look filled with need.
“Hurry back.” You shoot him a coy smile as he stumbles from the car.
The smell of warm crust and greasy pepperoni filled the car, the pizza nicely heating your lap. William’s arm draped over your shoulder, you allowed the rumbling car ride to rock you into his side. Your eyelids grow heavy as you try to keep yourself awake, a sleepy smile crawling across your features as you pull into the driveway. You sighed as you looked around at the mess of moving boxes, your dining table tucked away into a corner that would be too much work to get to. “Why don’t you go sit on the couch doll, I’ll be right back.” William’s hand quickly slips into yours, giving it a gentle squeeze as he passes by. You flop back into the cushions, letting the pizza box rest next to you. Even with the short amount of time you’ve spent in the house you could tell how different it was from your old apartment. You and William had moved to the middle of the woods in Hurricane, your nearest neighbor at least ten minutes down the road. There were no sounds of your neighbors talking quietly through the walls, no footsteps of the dog that lived upstairs. The house was completely silent, outside completely pitch black. You jumped as William’s feet started to thud down the stairs. He pushes into the living room with a groan, dragging your mattress behind him. He drops the bed in the middle of the floor with a dull thump, twisting side to side in order to stretch out his back. “I’ll go grab some pillows and blankets.” He smiles at you.
“It’s just like our honeymoon.” You laugh as he pulls you up from the couch. He tilts your chin up with his finger, capturing your lips with his.
“Oh, trust me,” he starts in a sultry tone, “I wish I could spend this entire week in bed with you.” You dropped down onto the mattress, a soft sigh falling from your lips as he massages your shoulders. You smile at him as you watch him disappear upstairs, returning a few minutes later with a box full of your bedding and some pillows. Deciding you weren’t up for the challenge you left the sheets in the box. You piled your comforter and a few throw blankets onto the bed, you crawled in before your husband joined you with the pizza. You two sit side by side, your head falling to rest against his shoulder.
“It’s no Freddy’s.” You grumble at your lackluster pizza. William chuckles in response to your pouting.
“How about we swing by and see Henry tomorrow, I’m sure I can sneak you a piece.” He winks with a lopsided grin.
“That sounds perfect.” The two of you chat quietly as you eat your dinner. Your new house feels too big for just the two of you. You laid on your back, staring at the exposed wood ceiling, you blinked a few times to adjust to the all consuming darkness after William had turned off the light. You felt the blankets shift as he crawled into bed next to you. His silhouette outlined by the soft, pale light of the moon that streamed through the window.
“We should get a dog.” He suddenly whispers, making you giggle. “I don’t want you to get scared all by yourself.” He teases.
“Maybe that’ll get you out of that workshop earlier.” He playfully rolls his eyes as he wraps an arm around your waist.
“You know, there’s nothing stopping you from coming to visit me.” He argues with a slight shrug.
“Except that everytime I do I end up sprawled naked on your workbench.” You smirk at him, your fingers absentmindedly playing with the soft material of his tshirt.
“Occupational hazard.” He responds quickly. You both laugh as you cuddle into his chest. He cards his fingers through your hair, his lingering gaze studying your features. “You’re so beautiful, bunny.” Your eyes flutter shut as his lips brush over yours.
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His hand paws at your thigh, dragging your leg over his waist as he crushes you against him. You cup his face, deepening the kiss, his beard tickling your palm as you melt into him. Your legs lock around his waist as he rolls on top of you. His large, calloused hands wrap around your sides, pushing your hoodie up and over your head in one swift motion before his lips connect with yours again. You shivered slightly as the cold night air hit your naked body. He practically purrs at the sight of you, his lips hovering over your neck. Your fingers slid into his hair, a small squeal escaping your lips as he bit down hard on your sensitive skin. You bite your lip, letting out a soft hum as he pushes his hips into you, his already growing bulge noticeable through your thin shorts. “You couldn’t keep your eyes off me today, could you rabbit?” He smirks against your skin. You practically drooled over the sight earlier. William had a box resting on each shoulder, his skin glowing with a thin sheen of sweat. He paused as he caught sight of you leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over your chest as your eyes raked over him. He smirked, knowing that playful glint in your eye. He smiled as he noticed your cheeks reddening from your position laying below him. He hooks his fingers into the band of your shorts, placing featherlike kisses down your stomach as he eases them down your legs. You moan softly as you feel him nip at the skin of the inside of your thighs. Your back arches off the bed as he brushes his thumb over your sensitive clit, a broken moan leaving your lips. With how busy you had both been due to the move it had been a while since the two of you had been intimate. Your skin was already on fire from the small touch alone, William smirked as he watched your reaction closely. Your hands fisted in the blankets as he tossed your legs over his shoulders, his hot breath bouncing off your already soaked core. His arms slip around your hips, holding you firmly in place as he dove into hungrily lap at your folds. You moan out his name, already attempting to squirm away from his assault. He growls, dragging you closer to him. His fingers dig into your thighs with a bruising force, sure to leave marks behind. Your fingers tangle in his hair as his tongue swirls around your clit through your lace panties. He ate you out like a man starved, your soft gasps and quiet moans echoing in the empty room. You whined, tugging on his hair. “What’s the matter bunny?” He pushes your panties out of the way with his fingers, his skin growing slick with your arousal.
“I need you.” You whined, looking down at him with pleading, teary eyes. William gives in immediately with a soft chuckle, never one to deny you what you wanted. He tugs down your panties, placing soft kisses to your legs as he removes your final article of clothing at an agonizingly slow pace. He slides an arm under your back, pulling you on top of him as he collapses into the mattress. Your hands landed on either side of his head as you lost your balance, you blushed as you realized you were sitting on his broad, strong chest. He brushes your hair behind your ear before both of his hands wrap around your thighs.
“Come sit, bunny.” He coos, your face burning at his casual command. William absolutely loved whenever you sat on his face. However, he was well aware he would have to warm you up to the idea whenever he suggested it. You were always worried you were too heavy, you hadn't shaved, or you hadn't showered, and your husband always reassured you that none of those things were going to pose any problems for him. His beard tickled the inside of your thighs as you hovered over his eager mouth. His hands squeezed at your hips, groaning as your soft skin squished between his fingers. You cry out as he pushes you down onto him, his tongue lapping at your clit before he shoves his way in between your folds.
“Oh, fuck! Will!” You moan, your hips moving on their own. You let out a soft sob everytime his nose bumps against your clit. He growls, pressing hard into your hips as you try to wiggle away, his assault on your already sensitive cunt threatening to push you over the edge mere minutes after he starts. “Baby, it's too much.” Your voice shook as you tried to plead with him, years slipping from your damp eyes onto your cheeks as the coil of pleasure in your core wound tighter. William’s eyes were hazy as they met yours, his face smothered in your thighs as he greedily sucked your clit into his mouth. You tug his hair, making you groan against him. “I'm gonna cum.” It was all too much for you to handle, your body losing its rhythm as your climax threatened to rip through you. William let out an affirmative hum below you, knowing you were close by the slowing of your movements. He decides it's time for him to take over, determined to make you cum on his tongue. His fingers dig into the curve of your ass as he gradually increases the pace of your hips. You yelped as one of his hands suddenly connects with your skin, the mixture of pleasure and slight pain causing your soaked cunt to throb. Broken moans and whines rumbled effortlessly from your mouth, the fine tuned roaming of his hands paired with his expert tongue knowing just how you wanted to be touched to fall apart in his hands. William never got tired of making you finish. The way you would fall absolutely silent and still for a moment, mouth hanging open as no sound dared escape, your body taking time to catch up to the immense pleasure you were feeling. Now was no different. William felt his cock twitch at the sight of your eyes rolling back in your head, that brief moment of absolute silence making his ears ring before you screamed his name. He forced your hips to keep moving, never allowing your pace to slow as he felt your thighs shaking against his cheeks. You practically collapsed as he finally pulled his mouth off of you, a firm hand on your lower back keeping you upright as you shakily moved yourself back onto his chest. William reaches up to caress your cheek, wiping away tears that streaked down your skin. Your eyes felt heavy, you struggled to keep them open and on your husband as you came down from your high.
“Do you want to lay down?” He asks in a soft tone. You nod, collapsing into the mattress with a happy sigh. You hear the soft shuffling of William getting undressed before he gets under the blankets with a groan. You could feel the heat radiating off of him as he moved closer, his fingers ghosting over your waist before your pulled back against him. You can't help but giggle slightly as you feel his erection pressed firmly against your back.
“You want some help with that?” You press yourself into him, his breath catching in his throat at the contact as he tries to stifle a growl.
“You can't even keep your eyes open bunny.” He chuckles, you smile as you feel it rumble in his chest. You let out a dismissive sound, giving him a slight shrug. “How about we compromise?” You glance over your shoulder at him, curiously raising an eyebrow. Your eyes slide shut, letting out a soft hum as you feel his rough hands roaming over your skin. His fingers dip in between your thighs, gently coaxing them apart. You gasp as you feel his member prod at your entrance. “I could always fill you up before we go to bed.” He offers with a smirk, your face instantly flushing at the thought of cuddling up with your husband, trying not to squirm too much as he impaled you on his thick cock. You give him a nervous yet excited nod, the sight of you looking at him so sweetly as you chewed on your lip making it hard for him to not flip you over and pound you into the mattress. William assisted you holding your legs open, one massive paw wrapped around your thigh to allow him room to attempt to fit inside of you. You gripped tightly onto the sheets as he slowly began to push inside, the stretch from making it barely past his tip intense due to the lack of prep. “That's it sweetheart, just relax.” He purrs in your ear, pressing his lips to your shoulder. Another roll of his hips makes you whimper, feeling him slip slightly deeper into your fluttering cunt.
“Fuck, ‘s too big, ‘s not going to fit.” Your words slut as you tried to focus enough to speak. His pace was agonizing, you could feel every inch of him and every thick vein sliding over your velvety walls. You let out a shuddering breath as he finally bottoms out in you, the tip of his cock pressed snugly against your cervix. You felt like you would break in half at the smallest wrong move, even your slight shifting as you cuddled up with William had the edges of your vision going fuzzy.
“Such a good bunny, taking all of me so well.” His lips trail over your neck, you feel him smirk as you clench around him, repeatedly kissing and teasing what he knew was a rather sensitive spot of skin.
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Your fingers intertwined with his, his strong arms wrapped protectively around as you're held flush to his chest.
“I love you.” You say quietly, feeling sleep trying it's hardest to pull you under. He gives your hand a soft squeeze.
“And I love you, sweet girl.”
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Tag List: @yellowbunnydreams @zoey5252 @redflowery @loudchaosking (I think that's everyone, if I missed you or you would like to be added please let me know!)
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bubblergoespop · 2 months
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My Top Aaron Quotes
men who are just constantly tired of everything>>>>>
“Well buckle up, wiz kid.”
“So yeah, I am gonna miss you. I’m really gonna miss you.”
“Sue me. Except don’t. My brain is already fried from the financials, I don’t need to throw legalese on top of that.”
“Fuck it. There’s nothing in here I can’t replace. I want you."
“Oliver”
“I didn’t say I wanted to spend the day with you, I asked if you wanted to spend the day with me. I asked first.”
"Ell"
“Hey, stop it. Because you know how much I like you running your fingers through my hair. Makes my brain go all fuzzy.”
“I appreciate it. And you.”
“Oh, it’s not playing dirty. It’s just me making you feel good.”
“I didn’t realise I was apparently dating an anthropomorphic backpack.”
“H-hey—stop it. You—no, your kisses are just… it tickled. Shut up. So what if my sides are ticklish, it’s not like that’s weird, you shit.”
“Oh, and now you can’t even find the strength to lift your head out of my lap, hmm? You poor thing. Who knew that being lazy could be so exhausting?”
“I love you very much. Now get off me.”
“You talked a big talk back then. But it turns out you’re just a cuddle-hungry softy after all, huh? Yes you are. At least when you’re still sleepy, anyway.”
“I also know you’re probably the kind to fly off half-cocked and make me chase you down with the SPF 50 like a madman. If for no other reason than to infuriate me.”
“Come here. Come closer. Because I said so.”
“I love you. And I love rain. And I love being with the person I love while it rains. Isn’t that a fun little combo?”
“You are very cute looking up at me like that.”
“Or is the thought of a few more minutes in my arms that much of an imposition? Asshole. Mmm. I love you too.”
“I can’t even try to say a nice thing without you having to get some snark into it, can I? No, I wouldn’t have it any other way. You brat. I love you just as you are.”
“You make me better. And that’s no small order when you’re talking about me, given the high level I already started at.”
“A man’s gotta eat. And you’ve always been my favorite thing on the menu.”
“Oh yes, you’re so put upon. Your evil boyfriend only makes you a whole breakfast spread, he won’t then also let you sleep in even later than you already have.”
“Eli”
“Yes, in a shocking twist, I do find your absence unpleasant. Perish the thought, right?”
“Time spent with the people I care about is important to me. It doesn’t have to be time doing anything special, it doesn’t have to be conversations about our future or some greater purpose or any of that shit, I just want to be with the person that I’m with.”
“Sure, there are plenty of ways to sleep on a couch just fine. It’s your hybrid approach that lands somewhere between gymnast and pretzel that tends to get you in trouble.”
“You’re okay. It’s gonna be okay.”
“If it feels like it's coming on again, come tell us, okay?”
“I only met them a handful of times. They're sweet. They laugh a lot. They spent most of the time giving Elliott shit, it was funny. Not in like a mean way, like the way you do when you love somebody that much. They were a good balance for one another.”
“God I sound old. And I feel old. And I’m not, but it feels like it. A grumpy old man. Might as well start yelling at kids to not play so loud in the neighborhood, really complete the image.”
“Stop calling me an old man, only I’m allowed to call me old. Don’t be mean. I’m in a vulnerable state. I need baseless praise.”
“Yes. Holding you feels very productive.”
“Yeah. Let me just rub it on that pretty face for a little bit…”
“ It’d be fine. Almost as fine as you. I’m tired, I’m allowed to be stupid.”
“El, I have never hated you. You’re my little brother, I love you.”
“No the windows are mirrored glass. You should know that, you worked here.”
“Whose is it? Louder”
“Thank you baby. Yeah, thank you for trusting me like you do. […] All I wanna do is prove myself worthy of that trust.”
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heartlesscorpse · 5 months
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Pyramid Head thoughts 🩸🔪 △
Catering this to myself and my hornee NEEDS and anybody else’s ig because I’m a dirty boy rn and I have too many thoughts in my head revolving around my man and I need to spill my guts before I lose this precious brain rot. Oh yeah this got some nsfw shit (it’s gonna be like further down) so be sure to read at your risk, and don’t mind the occasional out of context shit bc that’s just my comments and me giggling so hard abt this fine mfer— this was pretty fun to make too ngl, I might do more in the future if I ever get anymore ideas from things or from people, Idk we’ll see.
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Pyramid Head’s possessive asf over his s/o, when you’re living inside a hellhole of a town full of monsters and a cult run by a bunch of lunatics, who else is gonna protect your ass none other than this 7’0” deity??? Man wouldn’t even hesitate to kill anybody or anything that came way too close to you.
Man’s not even gonna let you out of his sight for a second, wherever the hell you’re going he’s coming with you, you’re a fragile little thing after all. He doesn’t want anything bad happening to you, not on his watch.
The size diff between you and Pyramid Head is endearing as well as arousing just thinking about how he could manhandle you into any positions he wants and watch you struggle to take him in. You’re just so short compared to him, he finds it cute. <3
It’s fun to carry you around everywhere he goes because of how short you are compared to him. Doesn’t matter if you get a say in this or not, he’s gonna carry you whenever the hell he pleases and he’ll never let go.
Pyramid Head would’ve associated you with the colour white and some times gives you white clothing because you’re pure and the only non-sinner in this shit hole of a town.
Who the fuck needs a bed when you have Pyramid Head??? Hell, he’d probably prefer you to sleep on top of him so he could hold you in your sleep and protect you from all the dangers of Silent Hill. Not to mention he’d like the feeling of how squishy you are in his embrace, particularly your thighs, he likes wrapping his hands on them and squishing them gently in your sleep. Might be a form of comfort saying “I’m here, everything’s okay”, or he’s just admiring them. Who would’ve thought a large monster living on violence and inflicting pain on sinners would be so gentle with you? (Unless you wanted him to roughen you up a little of course then by all means, he’ll fuckin’ do it.) >:))
Because Pyramid Head only exists in Silent Hill and doesn’t know a lot about the outside world, it’s rather adorable watching him get all confused with that head tilt of his whenever you explain certain things to him couples do on a regular basis besides sex, but he does show some curiosity on said topic and possibly willing to do those things with you as well.
Pyramid Head enjoys receiving attention from you, be it either hugs from behind or give him kisses on his helmet or the tongue— anywhere else is prolly gonna give him some other ideas of sorts, rnskfbsjfbw.
OH BOY the fucking dirty brain rot persists. If this man ever happened to be feeling horny he honestly wouldn’t hesitate taking your clothes off in one tear the second he has your consent.
Did I mention abt the size diff last time? Making you take in his cock nice and slow isn’t gonna do much, he’d want you to get over with the pain fairly quick so he’ll just push it in without warning lmao, of course once he’s in, he’ll allow you a brief moment to adjust to his size and once you’re all good he’s going to pound the fucking daylights out of you.
AGAIN WITH THE SIZE DIFF it’s just so satisfying and enjoyable to him watching you writhing and moaning underneath him like that, accounting to that just seeing you stuffed full of his come and utterly blissed out is adorable. (Like man I— let him rail me already PLEASEE)
And he’s for sure going to tease the fuck out of you to overstimulation until your mind is nothing but a puddle of mush and you’re begging for him. <33
Aftercare in the end is amazing, he’ll help clean you up by fucking eating you out with his tongue and then he’ll lay there with you in his arms, with a blanket big enough pulled over top to cover the both of you while you snuggle up in the mean time. A possible guarantee you’re gonna have a blast trying to walk in the morning./j
🥩⋆♱✮♱⋆🔪 🩸
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bao3bei4 · 1 year
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ON THE TSHIRT METHOD TO WRITING ESSAYS IN YOUR OWN TIME: 
i have had a couple people mention to me that they would like to write essays too, but they are a little out of practice. so i thought i should gather some scattered thoughts into one place. this is not a systematic guide. i am young and inexperienced and still working out things for myself, but this is my basic process and some things that have helped me, summarized. 
my biggest single piece of advice is to write with your proverbial pussy. you are not writing for a grade so don't act like it. forget rigor, forget academic style, etc. read what you're interested in, and write following up on the threads that you're interested in. don’t sweat the details. just do you.
if you still need more advice..... here’s a long winded post. 
step zero: if you have no clue what you want to say yet 
read. and read a lot.
but be realistic. be kind to yourself. your attention is a precious resource, and it is getting eaten up by shit out of your control all the time. if you’ve had a busy day, you may still have the brain power left to read. i almost never do. lol. so make sure to carve out time on a day off, if possible. otherwise you might end up completely fried, reading the same sentence over and over, and ending up scrolling on your phone LMAO. <-- painful lesson also to this end, if you haven’t picked up a denser book in a while, start with shorter articles, especially ones written more recently. if your attention wanders, try getting a physical book instead. the most important thing is just starting things you’ll actually read.  i’ve seen a lot of people (and been that person) who was like. “oh i’m going to start with THE canonical text in a subject i’m interested in” which makes sense right? but that book is inevitably long and dense and convoluted and boring. you can come back to it later. this shouldn’t feel like a chore! 
genuinely this is the most helpful thing you can do is just. read anything. it may be difficult at first (or always), but it is still the easiest way to engage with the foremost experts from around the world and the entirety of written history on any subject you are interested in. there’s not really a substitute to this. 
note: you may say that people can and do come up with brilliant ideas independently of their access to written works. this is true! but if you are one of them, you should skip this section/post, because you already know what you want to say.  okay that was a little too facetious. let me revise: when i say that, without reading, it will be hard to come up with more complex ideas than what you have now, that isn’t necessarily pejorative. maybe your current ideas and impulses are original and meaningful and complex. if they aren’t, however, you don’t have to resign yourself to it.  your experiences in real life are the most valuable thing you can bring to the table, but it can be very difficult to articulate and contextualize them without community—whether that be irl, or the simple textual company of other writers. you can let other people help you and teach you.  basically, this is a long winded way of saying something extremely simple: reading is not the only way to gain knowledge, or even the best. but it is an extremely consistent and relatively egalitarian way.** **scihub and libgen and sometimes the public library are your friends. (my local library’s book coverage is spotty) who cares about piracy. LMAO. 
you may surprise yourself by how nicely you fall into little spirals. you read one thing. and you are enamored with the way the author approaches their subject. so you end up reading everything else they’ve written, and then you start on the authors they list that inspire them in their interviews. maybe you just read one article that’s a little dry but it cites something else that seems far more interesting. read that next. and so on. 
if you are struggling to read that’s okay. you have options. start a book club (or just get a friend who also wants to read more). if that sounds like too much work, pick a friend to keep updated on all your new facts. you just want to get used to reading something, and telling someone your favorite parts again. skim books. skip the boring parts. drop them entirely and find a more interesting one. no one’s going to quiz you. this is for your own enjoyment. 
also important here: read books that make you want to write. sometimes this is because the methods and/or prose of the author are so exciting, you want to do something just like that. sometimes it’s because the content is so exciting, you want to say something about that too. sometimes they speak so powerfully to your own life, you want to tell people this is me!! i see this!! there are books i just enjoy reading, sure, and i do read them. but you know how, like, a good movie makes you want to tell stories too? good theory should do that too, in my opinion. 
step one: you have some ideas now. 
these ideas don’t have to be set in stone. but you should have an idea now of what you might talk about. personally, for me, i have two interconnected types of essay ideas. 
interventions. this is like [tumblr voice] Why Is Nobody Talking About This. i see some sort of hole. maybe i know how to fill it, maybe i don’t. 
free associations. basically i read one thing, or some analysis of one thing. and then it reminded me of another thing. and i’m like. i want to tease apart their connections, their similarities, and their differences. 
there are more types of ideas, i’m sure. but these are the ones i consistently have. with me, the second kind is more common. very rarely do i find that my thoughts are that original. rather, i’ve found that one of my strengths as a writer is being able to make connections that other people haven’t made, or haven’t made in depth before. IN MY OPINION. 
so i find it quite flexible. maybe i watch a movie, and it reminds me of my own life, because i think two women in the movie could be sad queer freaks. and i’m a sad queer freak. or it could be that i think scum villain could be analyzed through the framework of freudian psychoanalysis. you get the idea. 
at this stage of the process, i don’t have a thesis, necessarily. but i have a couple phrases i’m drawn to. i have a bullet point or two. i have vibes. 
to use an example from this blog, one of my friends hui once mentioned that that one fan image was going around again. we were going ughhh it’s victorian not chinese! together and they said “you should write a meta on it.” i wasn’t sure quite yet what i had to say. but i knew a couple things. 
this is, incidentally, because i had done some research into chinoiserie before, because i had cited the zuroski book for a paper i had to write for an english class some years before on pride and prejudice and its use of descriptions of material culture, an essay that in turn was inspired by my random yet deeply felt conviction that jane austen hated me personally and wanted to kill me.  this is why i encourage reading a lot. i think. 
to work on this stage, make lists. lots of them. i have a .txt file where i keep every essay idea i have. a lot of them are a sentence. or they're lists of books or theorists i think i could make something out of. or they're theses that feel true, but i’m not sure why yet. 
it took me a while to get to this point. just like with writing fic, there was a period when i first started where i was like. i only have one idea. i’m going to write it, and then i’m never going to write again. and then i had just one more idea. after a while. eventually you will find you have so many ideas and the world is full of possibilities. it’s a muscle you have to flex. like reading. and telling people about what you’re reading. 
actually, i feel like there was a step 0.5 here that i completely skipped. 
step zero point five that i skipped: how to generate ideas
my very truly complete “first time writing something semi-academic that was original” (with a loose definition of the word original) was literally just me reading literary criticism of one book, and saying “i think this author’s thoughts can be applied to this other book” and found some textual evidence that supported that the process could be replicated. 
this is like, writing with training wheels on. eventually i got better at it (see aforementioned chinoiserie essay. i hope you agree.). but that was a good place to start for me. it made the proverbial blank page less intimidating, knowing i had a scaffolding. 
i suggest trying this. see how it goes for you. read around until you find some piece of criticism, or just some theory about how something works, that you like. and using your newfound hammer, go look for some nails. 
note: i know this expression is meant to like. be a negative thing. but you do have to start somewhere. it’s okay if it sucks. it’s just for your practice and your enjoyment. 
be cautious of stances. weak writing (in my OPINIONNNN) tries to unilaterally defend or condemn a behavior. what you need to do is treat your writing as a bit. and then you need to run with it. you need to take it farther than what is reasonable. if this bit is truly actually deeply true, then what does it mean about yourself? it’s like using a new set of pronouns as a joke or something. you know what i mean? (that was an example of what i’m trying to communicate here)
what else is key to look out for... look for oppositional pairs or tensions. look for perverse incentives and vicious circles. look for embarrassing ideas. that is, what would be extremely embarrassing if it was true? (or to admit that it was true) you may go—tshirt, here you’re just describing things that are sexy. yes, exactly, that’s the point. you want things that thrill. 
just keep reading and making notes until everything echoes with something else. now you’re ready for step two. 
step two: refine your ideas further. 
let me do this by demonstration. once more extending my earlier example of my chinoiserie essay, i knew that i really wanted to take zuroski’s points and basically... steal them. this is called “citation,” i guess. but i thought the following insights were useful to me: 
british women were invested in chinese material objects 
they incorporated them into their own subjectivity
past a certain point, they no longer “consumed” these signifiers, but these signifers became theirs 
critique of one was able to stand in for critique of the other
and from being on fandom twitter, i already had the following insights: 
people deliberately blurred the lines between china and england when it came to fans and tea
people also liked talking about victorian modesty when it came to china 
so it seemed like victorian england and china had a privileged relationship, in a lot of people’s minds in fandom. 
so it didn’t really seem a stretch to say... how can we look at one history, and apply it to our present? 
it was a bit of the combo of the two: i saw something i didn’t see people were talking about, and it reminded me of something else i’d read before. 
something that helps me a lot is tweeting about my essay ideas. if you have me on my private account, you already know this. it forces me to explain myself to someone who doesn’t know what i’m talking about in a very succinct way. oftentimes, i tweet something out while i’m brainstorming, and then i steal the phrasing back into my essay. see? tweets can be writing too. 
this is microdosing on step zero’s “read something and practice telling a friend about it.” now you’re writing something and telling a friend about it. 
step three: okay now you can like. open a google doc 
make an outline. i know i know i know. i’m sorry. you can start just barfing thoughts if you want, but eventually everything that was on the top of your head will be out. and now you can start thinking about structure. the reason the outline is important is because it makes clear the logical progression from one idea to the next. 
i know i usually bounce around in my writing (a tendency which has been magnified here because this is so casual LMAO), but i always want to make sure that my points are substantiated. if we want to talk about how a causes b, we should prove a, we should prove the causal link, and only then can we infer b, for instance. it doesn’t really matter what order that happens in (or even that we set about it that way), but the more complicated your idea is, the longer checklist you need. it’s just a checklist. that’s all. 
as you start writing, you’ll probably need to read some more. you’re going to want to say something you think is true, but you’re going to realize that you haven’t proved it (or you can’t). go look to see if someone else has proved it. 
maybe you’re right. add that evidence in. maybe you’re wrong. now your essay has a new direction. there is a living thing beneath you. actually, on that idea— 
i tend to structure my outlines (if i’m not sure yet what my point is) by pasting a bunch of quotes in a document, and reorganizing them until they make sense, they seem to flow. and then i start explaining why, until i realized i have begun to walk off in a new direction. always embrace that new direction. eventually you will find that you have not been taking twists and turns, but actually you were dizzily walking along a straight path. (unless you have been unfocused and you are trying to say too many things at once. ask a friend to read your essay if you’re not sure which is the case.) 
quotes are the smallest unit of your analysis. work with evidence. or, at least, i do. it makes writing an essay like solving a mystery. the idea of just spontaneously generating something new fills me with terror. rather, i want to autopsy something, trace its steps, and then discover how it came to be dead. this may not be true for you. but it’s true for meeeee and this is my post. 
tl;dr
0. read something and tell someone about it/post it out
0.5. come up with a bit and run with it
1. think "why is no one talking about this" or start free associating
2. come up with weird connections and tell someone about it/post it out
3. collect all of your posts and ideas into a gdoc and organize them.
anyway i like reading posts like this because i’m incredibly nosy. so i tried to write out the sort of thing i like to read from other people. i don’t suggest you actually try to replicate it (if anyone would even want to.) practically basically i just encourage you to try any single part of this that you think was interesting or relatable or helpful. personally, i suggest reading a book and posting your favorite lines from it. if you do this a couple times, i think you will find the seeds of an essay waiting for you in your own posts. 
#x
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wispscribbles · 7 months
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Mw3 spoilers (just a long personal ramble)
Hiii. So
As soon as the pre-release came out on, I hunted down spoilers, because I know myself and knew that if someone died and I got that information out of the blue, I wouldn’t take it well. Jokes on me, because I still haven’t been taking it well lol
I won’t talk about how Soap’s death was handled or the quality of the game. Plenty of smarter people are doing so.
I try not to talk a lot about myself and irl stuff on here, but will just say: I am very unwell, mentally. (Cue silence because that’s not surprising at all) Something I am very aware that I do, is that I latch onto fiction with my whole being, usually one specific character. For some reason, I always latch onto the character that ends up dead, usually in a way that make them only exist to further the motivations of other characters. It sucks.
So my hope for Soap has never been great, but for some reason I was still so shocked?? I don’t know, I tricked myself into thinking this time was different. Such an iconic character with so much good setup for great character development. I knew someone would die, but ow. To me, he was the element that made 141 seem more like family than coworkers. Soap’s interactions with the rest just livened up the games so much and made them all shine. Especially Ghost. Their dynamic, man.
Soap was the character that intrigued me enough to jump into the cod rabbit hole. It feels very hollow without him.
I keep telling myself that it’s silly to be so hurt over something fictional, and that I can just treat it as a mcd fanfic and move on, but nope. Brain’s stuck in the bad stuff. It’s a bad habit of mine to let something like this affect me so much, but well. Logic vs feeling and all that.
I really did find so much comfort in Soap this last year, that I severely needed. It feels a little like losing someone I know, someone who helped me through a rough time. I related to something in him and felt inspired. I only started writing after getting into ghostsoap, I started working out and I got back into art after a very long burnout. It may be fiction, but the impact is not.
So that was pretty much the worst case scenario of what mw3 could be to me. I always knew the risk, but, once again, ow. But there also seems to be plenty of good stuff in the game that I enjoy. I’m happy with the Ghost and Soap dialogue, the whole team working together and seeing Laswell and Farah and Alex and Nik. I hope I can be inspired by some of the new content once I’m calmer.
And I was worried they would ignore Ghost and Soap’s relationship after their development in mw2, but they genuinely seem to have gotten real close. It’s nice. I thought the shipping might scare the game devs into never having them appear in a scene together again, so that’s a plus.
Bottom line to all this is: I probably need a little break to get my head sorted. The grief is surprisingly real, it’s triggered some old stuff for me (haven’t been sleeping or eating, been stuck in some old thoughts). I’ll need to calm down and become a bit more normal about this again. Part of the grief isn’t so much about Soap himself, but also just the safe space that this account has been. The very nature of how the fandom is going to interact with Soap and Ghostsoap is going to change now, and man… I liked how it was, y’know? Could’ve used a little longer in that bubble. There’s going to be plenty of new fics and art, lovely stuff as always, but many of them will be tinged with grief, and I’m not in a place where that won’t break me a little.
I will hopefully come back to posting and making stuff once my brain settles down. I have so many drafts for fics and ideas that I hope I can return to. I’ve gotten so used to drawing these lads that I doubt I can stop tbh
The version of Soap that we love is already evolved from the games due to all the time and care the community has put into the character. The games may have killed him, but luckily, he’s fictional. We can do what we want, same as before.
I’m not even saying that I wish they hadn’t killed him. The games are crafting a story that fits their audience. It makes sense.
But I will choose to live in one of the many universes we’ve created for Soap, where he is alive and cared for, with a found family and a spooky lieutenant with a soft spot for him. Good for him.
Hope you’re all taking care of yourselves. RIP canon Soap (again). Thanks to Neil for a wonderful portrayal. And no matter where we go from here, thanks for a wonderful year of creating with you lovely folks. Seriously, some of the kindest people I’ve met in fandom. <3
Lastly: fuck you Kevin O’Reilly, but more importantly, sincerely thank you. (CallMeKevin video about mw2 got me into this mess. Otherwise I was keeping cod at an arm’s length, but he’s my fav youtuber, so I watched it. And here we are!)
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mikefaistslut · 28 days
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anything for you
chapter 3
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“So, I googled you.” It was the first thing I could think to say. I wish I’d gone with “you look nice,” or maybe “good to see you again,” but I went with, “So, I googled you.”
“Did you find anything good?” He was perfectly relaxed, and he really did look nice. Suit and tie, hair perfectly fluffy.
“Broadway isn’t exactly a small stage.” I said, easing into it. He could see where I was going with this.
“I liked that you didn’t know who I was. Also, I would’ve seemed like a dick if I’d read off my entire professional resume. ‘Did you want my extra bag of peanuts? Also, I wanted to let you know I was nominated for a Tony.’ I’d only bring it up in casual conversation if i’d won.”
"West Side Story isn't exactly a 'short film' either. There's pictures of you standing next to Steven. Spielberg." I talked about it like this was news to him, like it wasn't literally his life and his memories. He seemed amused.
"Are you angry I didn't tell you?"
"Not angry so much as just shocked. I assumed I was flirting with a super low-key struggle-for-your-art kinda guy. Not a guy who knows what Steven Spielberg smells like."
"Kind of citrus-y. Maybe a little earthy tone to it." I hated myself for all the questions I had to ask. But I couldn't not ask.
"So if you're that famous, how come you weren't flying on a private jet situation?"
"I'm not private jet famous. I mean, don't get me wrong, I definitely get recognized, it's just more by theater people. Dear Evan Hansen fans, West Side, Newsies, you get it."
"See, that was you reading off your professional resume. But I figured that's what it was. I was never super into musicals. I tried to be, I could just never get it to stick in my brain. I went in and out of a lot of phases as a kid." I was dying to ask more of the juicy details, but I couldn't. Not yet. On the other hand, I found myself just wanting to know more about him personally, and I wanted him to know more about me. All the lame stuff like his favorite color, his favorites movies when he was a little kid, what his parents are like, etc. But I also wanted to know what it would be like to touch him. To kiss his beautiful face. To breathe him in. I asked all the questions and I let him go on and on. He'd try to steer the conversation to something about me and I'd turn it right back around to him. Anything just to stare at that gorgeous face just one second longer. Dinner was coming to an end and I hadn't even noticed how much time had passed until he brought it up.
"I'm sorry, I feel like I've just talked about only myself for the last three hours. Is that a total turn-off?" He was so fucking adorable.
"You could talk to me about anything and it wouldn't be a turn-off." And I meant it too. He seemed to like this answer.
"So if I started to talk about calculus or hip dysplasia or microbiology, you'd still want to go back to my hotel room with me?"
"Do you even know enough about those things to have an actual conversation about them?" I was avoiding the question.
"You're avoiding the question.. and no, I don't. I'm a dramatic arts school drop out. Sexy, right?"
I was eager, and he could tell. "Are you ready to go now?" I asked, gaining confidence.
"I was waiting for you to say that." Mike quickly paid the bill and stretched his hand out to mine to lead me out of the restaurant and into the cool, London air. He placed his hand on the small of my back as we walked to his hotel. I began to feel so incredibly nervous. Would he want to see me again if I gave it all away so soon? Would he still respect me? Does he even respect me now? A million questions were flooding through my mind, but I did my best to just relax. I decided to take things slow and let him take the lead. Maybe I was over thinking everything and he was just leading me back to his hotel room so we could order room service dessert and watch movies together, fully clothed and sitting six feet away from each other on opposite ends of the room. Maybe I was completely delusional and nothing remotely exciting was going to happen.
When we got to his hotel and the elevator doors shut to take us up to his room, I felt the sexual tension. At that point, I didn't care if he respected me. I needed to touch him and I needed him to touch me. I started slow, taking my hand from his and reaching further up his arm to wrap my hand around his bicep.
"Are you nervous?" He was a mind reader apparently.
"A hundred percent. But I really like you. Really really like you. I'm trying to be present and in the moment and spontaneous, and-"
He cut me off by pressing each of his hands on the sides of my face, pushing my hair behind my ears and walking me back against the wall of the elevator. He looked into my eyes and whispered, so delicately, "I'm going to kiss you now, okay?" Him asking only made it a million times more attractive. Cheeks flushed and heart in my stomach, I could only nod. He pressed his lips to mine. Slowly, our mouths melted together as I wrapped my hands around his slender waist, pulling him into me. Needing him even closer than he already was if that was even possible. As we both grew more passionate, more needy for each other, the elevator doors opened to his floor. We both pull ourselves away at the sound of someone clearing their throat, clearly not prepared to walk in on the scene we'd created.
"Oh! Uh, um- we're very sorry," Mike says as he grabs my hand and pulls me out of the elevator, rushing me down the hallway while simultaneously fishing for his key in his pants pocket. I laugh so hard my stomach begins to cramp.
The second we're inside his hotel room, I feel myself being picked up and thrown over Mike's shoulder. Both laughing, he places me on his bed and leans over, propping himself up on his hands.
"I'm going to fuck you now, is that okay?"
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urfavbooblover · 7 months
Text
Letter with lipstick || Ada Wong x female reader
Warnings: none
(remind me if I missed any)
- Resident evil 4 masterlist link -
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Y/N’s pov:
Earlier:
Sitting on my bed, i stared down at the letter in my hands. Her handwriting was beautiful, less of the words she wrote to me. She’s on a mission again, all the way in spain and couldn’t tell me one thing about it, neither why she was there. “It’s important”, she committed to the paper i was holding.
She just ended the letter with “Love, Ada”, as my eyes landed on the kiss she placed right next to it, with the lipstick she always wore. The kinda red i love seeing on her and she knew all about it. I let out a sigh, “The woman that you are, Ada.”, i said, folding it together again.
Ada and I are close, too close just to be partners. We ‘slipped’ one time and in the next moment you saw our lips all up on each others.
I missed her. I couldn’t stand the thought of now not seeing her again for who knows how long. She’s good at what she’s doing, fulfilling her job just for everyone to be more than satisfied and i was feeling proud of her, for how far she has come. But the thought of losing her, especially when she’s so far away, has taken over my brain.
I informed myself about the situation, asking everybody for detailed answers. Anybody needs to know where she’s at, no? They weren’t down right away to tell me, but eventually gave in. Who were they to stop her from going there? Exactly, she did her own thing, going after what’s happening in rural spain.
“I need you to take me there.”, i commanded, standing tall against them. There was nothing they could do about this either. I’m not easily giving up, someone must have the trust to let me ‘surprise’ my woman. At least that’s what i liked to call it. I know Ada will be more than caught off to see me, however she wouldn’t mind. Quite the opposite. I can’t expect much different than a nice welcome.
Present:
Now here i am. I’ve been dropped off by the helicopter and one of my kind co workers who brought me to this place. I can thank him a lot for this, i guess i owe him something but that’s not my worry yet. I have to find her. So i didn’t think much, i rather started looking at the area around me.
It looks like a farm, the area is completely destroyed. I walked over dead bodies, scrunching up my face in confusion. Nothing i’ve never seen before, but someone must’ve been the cause of this. Was it Ada?
I was informed about a little story, so i went careful into this. I was here for only one thing actually. Ada. Whatever comes in my way isn’t as much as important as her, nothing is. No one else. I was ready to be confronted by her pretty self and sped up my walking through the paths and winding ways.
I was prepared for everything. I had my weapons and all that i could possibly need. I’d do anything to bring us both out of here. Anything for us. She surely knows i don’t give up easily and most definitely wouldn’t on her. No one even compares to her and the way she makes me feel. There’s no one quite like Ada.
I needed answers though. Am i really on the right track? I guess i was answering my own questions and thoughts when i came across a giant creature laying eliminated on the ground. Who else could’ve defeated it? She was here, i was more than convinced.
I jogged along the stony and muddy path, when i suddenly heard something. I slowly moved forwards to where those sounds came from, confirming myself that i’m hearing voices. It was all blurry and i didn’t know whose it might be. Till i made out the statute of a familiar woman. My eyes landed on her, my woman.
“No way..”, i whispered to myself, taking one more step towards her. “Ada!”, i shouted, catching her attention. Her body turned around, slightly facing me. I felt something in my stomach, when i saw her face. She immediately recognized me, her gaze softening but then again with confusion written all over her. She was completely stunned and couldn’t seem to move.
“Y/N?”, she said in a questioning tone, as i moved over to where she was standing. I was about to open my mouth, before i glanced down. A man stood there, his eyebrows were furried together as my face expression could be read as jealous. Who the fuck is he?
“Y/N. Look at me.”, i heard her soothing voice close to my face, interrupting my staring interaction with that guy. I slowly turned my head, seeing the slight worry on her. “What are you doing here? How did you get here in the first place? Are you hurt?”, she placed her hand on my arm, only ever showing so much weakness around me.
“I’m okay, Ada. I came here just for one reason, it was a pretty long flight.”, i explained, looking into her eyes that always shined so beautiful. “What about you?”, i asked as she moved her hand down to grab my own. “I’m on this mission, i was doing fine till i saw you. Now i’m feeling even better.”, she gave me a small wink before that strange man interrupted us.
“Uhm? I’m still here.”, he said in a nervous tone, letting out a playful chuckle. “Who is-“, “I have a deal with him.”, Ada interrupted my question, knowing what i was about to ask. She knew how protective i can be of her. Not in a controlling way though, most things i do are out of worry, making sure she’s doing as okay as she always claims.
“I got a name too, lady.”, “I’m Luis. You must be that girlfriend Ada kept mentioning and talking about.”, he continued. Ada’s eyes widened in response as a smirk formed on my face. So she called me her girlfriend behind my back? “Well yes i am.”, i confirmed very proudly, as i could see a rose color appear on her cheeks.
I placed a gentle kiss on her cheek, taking her hand in mine. “I missed you, Ada.”, i whispered and watched her nervous state. “I missed you even more, Y/N.” I smiled at her, before looking down at Luis once more. “You surely don’t mind.”, i said, pulling Ada with me as we walked away from that scene.
“Hey! How am i supposed to get up here though?!”, Luis yelled after us, all desperate. We both chuckled to ourselves and i took Ada to a quiet place. I moved close to her body, our face just a few inches apart. “I came here just for you.”, i whispered, tilting my head a little to the side.
“Oh what would i do without you, Y/N.”, Ada responded in her typical flirty voice. “Be glad you have me.”, i muttered, closing the gap between us. It’s been way too long since the last time i felt her soft lips against mine. They tasted just like cherries.
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yournowheregirl · 1 year
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remember when i said this was gonna be 5 parts? psych! it’s gonna be six parts of the secret-dolly-parton-fan eddie munson saga (thanks again for all the love on this fic & a special thanks to @gothbat99 and @legitcookie for listening to my rambling about this part 🥰)
[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 5] [part 6 + complete on ao3]
part 4: i will always love you
Eddie never thought himself to be an overthinker. 
In fact, during the majority of his life a lot of people assumed he didn't think at all considering the way he flunked senior year twice (He got there in the end, though). But lately - well, actually ever since Pat swore up and down Steve isn’t as straight as Eddie originally thought - Eddie’s brain has been running at a hundred miles an hour.
More specifically, Pat’s words have been echoing through his mind, haunting him, torturing him, every time he hangs out with Steve.
“Hey man, that shirt looks really great on you.” Steve says one day when Eddie shows up at Family Video wearing a red henley. It’s an old shirt he found earlier that week when Wayne forced him to clean out his closet, a little tight but it still fit so Eddie decided to keep it.
“What, this old thing?” Eddie scoffs, playing with the frayed hem of the shirt.
“Yeah, it’s… it suits you. Looks nice.” Steve smiles. 
“Thanks.” Eddie replies. His smile is tight, in the hopes that he doesn’t give away the swarm of butterflies currently residing in his stomach.
But are ya sure that boy’s straight?
“Wait, what’s happening again?” Steve asks one night during Will’s latest Hellfire campaign. 
It’s the first time in literal years that Eddie’s been playing a character instead of DM’ing and so far, he’s been very impressed with Will replacing him. Though his story lines can be a little too detailed at times, which makes it hard for Steve - who hasn’t been there during every D&D night - to keep up. 
So, Eddie explains it to him. He’s patient, keeping his voice low so the others won’t overhear and carefully watches Steve connect the dots. Watches how that cute little frown in between his eyebrows slowly fades away and is replaced with a soft smile. 
“Which brings us here, to the Rotting Grove and now we gotta wait until Dustin’s character makes a decision.” Eddie says finally, but Steve stays quiet. He’s still looking at Eddie, eyes wide with wonder, maybe he still doesn’t understand the plot just yet. “Sorry, did I go too fast? You want me to start again?”
“No, no, I got it.” Steve shakes his head, smiling. “Thanks for explaining it, though. You’re a great story teller, Eddie.” He says, bumping their shoulders together but never pulling away.
Steve stays glued to Eddie’s side throughout the rest of the night, whispering the occasional question or snarky comment in his ear, sending a chill down Eddie’s spine every time he feels Steve’s lips brush against his skin.
But are ya sure that boy’s straight?
“You really gotta be more careful.” Steve says sternly one afternoon, after Eddie has fallen face-first onto the ground during one of Max’ skateboarding lessons, leaving him with a nasty graze on his cheek. 
“I was being- fucking Christ, Steve.” Eddie hisses as Steve dabs a washcloth against Eddie’s bloodied cheek. “Will you stop that? That hurts like hell.”
Steve ignores his protests, rolling his eyes. “An infection hurts even more, so just stay still, will you?”
His hand, big and warm, finds Eddie’s hip, holding him still against the bathroom counter, as Eddie tries to think of literally anything that’ll stop his blood from going south because this not the place or time to pop a boner right now. Which somehow results in him being particularly mopey to Steve.
“I can take care of myself y’know? Been doin’ it all my life.” He grunts when Steve slowly removes the washcloth. 
“I know you can.” Steve replies softly. “But sometimes it’s nice to have someone taking care of you for a change.”
He runs his thumb over Eddie’s cheek, wiping away the last of the blood before placing his his hand on Eddie’s jaw, turning his face to see if there are any wounds to be taken care of. When Steve nods, obviously proud of his work, Eddie almost wants to go out there and trip another time, just to feel Steve’s hands on his skin again. 
“Besides, you need someone around here who actually knows first aid. God forbid something happens to that pretty face of yours.” Steve smirks, before patting Eddie’s chest and walking out of the bathroom, leaving Eddie speechless for the first time in his life.
But are ya sure that boy’s straight?
Pat’s words keep getting louder and louder in his mind to the point that it’s the only thing Eddie can think about. He overanalyzes every single one of Steve’s movements, every word that rolls off his tongue, every glance sent his way, to the point that he swears he’s going insane.
Because the more he starts thinking about it, the more Pat might actually be right and isn’t that the most terrifying thing in the wold?
-xxx-
“Dude, will you stop that?”
Eddie looks up from where he was mindlessly staring out the window and glares at Dustin, who glares right back at him. “What?”
“Your leg.” Dustin pokes him in said leg, the one that’s been bouncing uncontrollably for the past few minutes. “It’s fucking annoying.”
Dustin’s been at the Munson trailer since early afternoon, figuring out the perfect songs to  put on the mixtape he’s mailing Suzie for their anniversary. Eddie had felt honored that Dustin came to him, rather than the so-called leading expert on romance (Steve) but now his patience is wearing thin. 
Don’t get him wrong, he loves the squirt with all his heart, but Dustin’s been contemplating between two very similar songs for thirty minutes now and his indecisiveness is starting to get on Eddie’s nerves.
“Maybe if you hurried the fuck up, my leg wouldn’t be shakin’ Henderson.” Eddie retorts. “C’mon, hurry up, will ya? I got places to go, people to meet.”
Dustin snorts. “Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
“You know, going out to the woods to deal doesn’t exactly count as Friday evening plans.” Dustin says.
“Hey!” Eddie protests. “You know I don’t do that shit anymore, not with those shady government assholes watching my every move.” He sighs, fiddling with the rings on his fingers. “But if you must know, me and Steve are having a movie night at his place and you know how huffy he gets when I’m late.”
That’s not entirely true. Sure, Eddie’s going over to the Harrington house tonight and sure they’re gonna watch a movie, but it’s also the night that Eddie decided to finally make a move on Steve. And maybe, if everything goes right, tonight will be the night that he finds the guts to Steve how he feels.
Which is why Dustin needs to get a move on because he really needs those extra few hours to contemplate his existence, have a panic attack, talk himself down from said panic attack and figure out what he’s going to wear.
“Okay, now I know you’re lying.” Dustin says, looking anything but impressed with Eddie.
“What? I ain’t lying, Henderson.” Eddie frowns. He grabs the VHS tape from the coffee table and waves it in Dustin’s face. “See, I got the movie and everything.”
“Yeah, well, you must have gotten the days mixed up.” Dustin shrugs. “Steve’s got a date tonight.”
“Yeah, right.” Eddie says, rolling his eyes at Dustin and ignoring the way his heart is starting to beat a little faster out of sheer panic. “Steve hasn’t been on a date since he broke up with Emily. And even if he has a date, I doubt he would’ve planned it at the same time as our movie night.”
“Well sorry to burst your bubble, but I know for a fact that Steve’s got a date tonight because he told me.” Dustin’s tone is bordering on condescending but Eddie doesn’t even have energy to tell him off right now because what the fuck? What does Dustin mean by that? And maybe more importantly, why did Steve leave Eddie in the dark about all this?
A heavy feeling settles down in his stomach, but he can’t let Dustin see his inner turmoil so he goes with indifference instead. “Pff, sure he did.”
“I saw him buy roses, Eddie! They were red too and that’s like, a dead giveaway for romance!” Dustin declares. “And when I talked to him about it he got this… weird, mushy look in his eye, which by the way gross, and said something about making tonight special and shit. Which again, gross, but if that doesn’t scream romantic evening to me, then I don’t know what is!”
Slowly, as Dustin’s words are starting to sink in, the heavy feeling grows stronger and stronger until Eddie feels his stomach drop.
Steve’s going on a date. 
Steve’s going on a date and just ditches Eddie without saying a word.
Steve’s going on a date with someone who isn’t Eddie.
Steve’s going on a date which means Pat was wrong.
“Get out.” Eddie says, voice on edge.
“Geez, didn’t know you’d get so upset. It’s just a cancelled movie night, I’m sure Steve-”
“Out!” Eddie exclaims, his tone way harsher than it needs to be. It obviously affects Dustin, who flinches at his words, but Eddie doesn’t care. Well, he does but he’ll apologize to Dustin later, once he starts to feel normal about all of this. 
Dustin quietly packs his stuff, mumbling something under his breath as Eddie just stands there, frozen. Eyes glued to the coffee stain on the carpet, mind reeling with thoughts of Steve ditching him for some date he didn’t even tell him about. 
He hears Dustin say a quiet goodbye but he stays there for a good few minutes before he finally snaps out of his trance and grabs the keys to the van from the kitchen counter. He doesn’t even see the dark clouds forming in the sky, he just gets in the van and drives. 
-xxx-
Rain is still pouring down when Eddie arrives at the Off-Road. Not that he really cares about the weather right now, he’s got other things on his mind. He pulls his leather jacket over his head and jogs over to the entrance, only to find the door closed and the lights off.
Great. Like his day couldn’t get any worse.
Eddie slumps down on the porch in front of the bar, not caring that he’s sitting on wet wood or that the wind is blowing the raindrops right in his face. The rain is actually pretty nice right now, hiding the tears that are slowly rolling down his cheek.
Crying over Steve motherfuckin’ Harrington. That’s a new low, even for him.
And the thing is, any other time Eddie could’ve dealt with Steve getting another date. Yeah, it’d probably hurt like a bitch and Eddie would’ve been sulking for a day or two, but he would’ve been fine. It would’ve been just another Emily situation, just another reminder that Steve would never been his.
But Steve keeping him in the dark about his date, Steve just flat-out cancelling their movie night without even telling him, after weeks of, let’s be honest, low-key flirting? That somehow hurts even more. It just feels like Steve doesn’t really care about him, like Steve’s using him like a fucking Kleenex - use once, then throw away when it’s no longer useful.
The thoughts in his head are so loud, so overwhelming, that he doesn’t even hear a pick-up truck stopping a few steps from him. Doesn’t hear the hushed voices or the wet sounds of footsteps through the mud.
“Ed? Whatcha doin’ here kid?”
Eddie looks up from where he had been staring at his feet, only to find Pat and Tish standing in front of him, huddled together underneath an umbrella. The worried looks on both their faces makes Eddie just cry even harder.
“Oh honey.” Tish says softly. “Let’s get you inside, okay?”
Pat and Tish lead him inside and up the stairs that lead to the apartment above the bar. It’s small, but cozy and feels like a home, with little trinkets and old photos scattered just about everywhere. Pat firmly plants Eddie down at the kitchen table and hands him a couple of towels as his tears slowly start to fade. He hadn’t even realized how cold he was until Pat throws a woolen blanket over his shoulders and Tish puts down a pot of hot chamomile tea.
“So…” Pat says as she sits down across from him at the kitchen table. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” Eddie sniffs, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. “It’s stupid.”
“We’ll be the judge of that.” Pat says sternly, though her eyes are soft. “Now tell us what happened.”
And Eddie just spills everything. How Pat’s advice has been haunting him, how he’s been overanalyzing every of Steve’s moves, how he was so sure that Steve liked him back, only to be tossed aside without a care. He tears up again a few times and it’s so embarrassing he wants to be buried alive, even with Pat and Tish just listening and telling him it’s okay.
Once he’s done, he just feels empty - no more tears to cry, no more words to say, just an empty, hollow feeling where his heart used to be. 
“Eddie, I’m so sorry, honey.” Tish sighs as she pours him another cup of tea. He’s not usually a tea drinker but he’s had two cups already - he swears Tish put some kind of crack in it, rather than sugar cubes. “For what it’s worth, he doesn’t deserve you. Not if he treats like you like, pardon my French, dogshit.”
Hearing Tish swear, while she’s generally so prim and proper, makes Eddie laugh, even through his dried-up tears. “Thanks, Tish.” He sighs, slouches down in his chair and looks up at the wooden ceiling. “But I guess this was good, in some twisted, fucked up way. Just the slap in the face I needed.”
“What’d you mean?” Pat frowns.
“It’s just… I been running after him like some lovesick puppy even though I know he’ll never feel the same.” Eddie says. “And it’s not doing me any good, now is it? Guess this is a sign that it’s time for me to move on.”
He knows he said that before, back when Steve started dating Emily, and even though it clearly didn’t work out the way he wanted to, Eddie has to make it work now. He has to say goodbye to Steve because he’s not so sure his poor heart’ll survive if he doesn’t.
And he knows exactly how he’s going to do just that.
Eddie jumps up from the table and races downstairs, ignoring Pat and Tish’s confused noises as they follow him. He fumbles with the lights for a moment but as soon as the lights are partially on, Eddie walks up to the podium, grabs the guitar off the wall and sits down on the stool that has become so familiar to him.
The bar is silent because of course it is and for a second Eddie just wants to laugh at how weird this whole situation - singing in a bar just to process his dumb feelings, even with no audience around (well, there’s an audience if you count Pat, Tish and the wind howling outside). But he has to do this, needs to do this, audience be damned. 
His hands are shaking, hesitating to play the first few chords. It’s not like he doesn’t know the song, in fact he knows it by heart and played it plenty of times, But he never actually sang the words, too scared what’ll mean if he’ll say them out loud. 
“If I, should stay… I would only be in your way. So, I’ll go but I’ll know, I’ll think of you each step of the way.” Eddie sing softly, voice already wavering because he was right for not singing this song before - it fucking hurts. “And I… will always love you.”
Eddie’s voice echoes through the empty bar, causing to sound more hollow than it already is. A shiver runs up his spine when he feels a cool breeze of wind - the wind must’ve flung the door open. Eddie doesn’t look up, closes his eyes instead and lets the music take him.
“Bittersweet memories, that’s all I’m taking with me.” He hears Pat and Tish whispering to another, can’t really see them from where they’re standing in the dark but their hushed voices sound tense. Not that Eddie’s really listening, it’s all background noise as he continues strumming his guitar. 
“Goodbye, please don’t cry. We both know…” Eddie chokes on his on voice, the words hitting a little too close to home. He takes a deep breath and tries again, refusing to shed anymore tears. “We both know that I’m not what you need.”
“Eddie?”
Someone’s calling out his name. A familiar voice. A way too familiar voice. 
Steve’s voice.
But that can’t be. Steve’s doesn’t knows he’s here. Steve’s too busy wooing his goddamn date with those goddamn roses.
It’s just in his head. It’s just his mind playing tricks on him. He just needs to finish this song and then this fake Steve will disappear and-
“And I… will always love you. I will always-” 
“Eddie, please.”
Eddie stops playing as a shadow washes over him, a figure blocking the spotlight. He squints, trying to identify whether it’s Pat or Tish who interrupted him, only to find that it’s neither of them
Because there, with floppy wet hair plastered to his face and a thoroughly soaked pink button-down and blue jeans, stands the one person Eddie had run away from in the first place.
Steve.
tag list (there are so many of you now omg ily):
@cheatghost @henderdads @unclewaynemunson @goblin-eddie @trikigirl271 @alienace @fandomcartographer @stevethehairington @blank1eboi @this-earlobe-is-naked @fruitandbubbles @courtjestermunson @steveisabicon @stereoteleversion @wrenisflying @spectrum-spectre @hotluncheddie @punkharringtxn @remislupinsthevoiceofgod @panicatthediaz @thegingervulcan @sharkruption @goodolefashionedloverboi @thelastwalkingsoul @undreamingscatworld @starrystevie @magipemuseum @mightbeasleep @corrodedcoughin @linkydinky06 @hardboiledeggs @gamerdano @limpingpenguin @blackpanzy @piningapple @teelagurl558 @theokatz @moonlightmirrorball @milf-harrington @raisedbylibrarians @eddiemunsonswife @catateme9 @stranger-poets-society
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When the cat's away...
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Peter B. Parker x Blackcat!reader
description - Peter B. Parker didn't end up at MJ's house that night. Instead he found his way into the arms of the woman he never thought he could have until the multiverse showed him differently.
Or
Miles shows up to the spider society and finds Peter in the arms of someone who is definitely not MJ
warnings - babies, sexual innuendo, brief angst, SPOILERS for across the spiderverse, Miguel being Miguel.
word count - 1.7k
authors note - I have found a new character to write about! I mean I loved Peter B in Into the Spiderverse but then I recently watched Across the Spiderverse and something about seeing him with Mayday just ignited that love again. Also hears to me finding another cartoon baby to obsess over!
Masterlist
Requests open - here
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
I watched from the rafters. Perched so precise. Peter had promised he wouldn’t take Mayday to work anymore, it wasn’t a safe environment for a child. And since he hadn’t caught me with her at the spider society yet, I still had the moral high ground.
“Don’t be too hard on the kid, Miguel. He had a terrible teacher.” Peter swung in and was wearing…oh god. He’d stolen my robe, again. But I couldn’t be too hard on him, he did look so sexy in it. Just something about seeing him so domestic that really got me going.
Peter and Miles hugged each other, having not seen one another in months. They continually talked over the other, having so much to say, before Miles took note of the baby carrier Peter wore so stylishly. His suspicions were confirmed when Mayday swung into the scene, giggling so beautifully.
“You have a baby?”
“I have a baby!”
“Don’t forget to keep your little day pass on honey.” He then spotted the one Miles sported. “You have one too? I didn’t know they made them for adults?”
I watched her in awe until she latched onto the wall and began to crawl up to where she saw me, babbling ‘mama, mama’. Peter swung after her, moaning about how he shouldn’t have made her that web shooter. We thought it was a good idea at the time!
He put her back in the carrier. “I shouldn’t have made her that, that was an actual parenting mistake.” But because he forgot he was upside down; our little angel fell right out. I giggled to myself just watching the goofball, I got to call my husband.
I squirmed up further into the dark, not wanting Peter to see me just yet. What? I’m a sucker for a dramatic entrance.
“You guys want to see pictures!” That was when I zoned out. I mean I loved Mayday so much and I took a lot of pictures, but my definition of a lot cowered in the face of Peter’s amount of photos. “Oh my god, Miguel’s gonna die!” He swung back over to the stoic fang man, as I liked to call him.
“Miguel, look at this one.”
“I’m trying to hold a serious, adult conversation.” Yet the sight of Mayday crawling all over him whilst babbling nonsense, was a nice juxtaposition to his stern demeanour.
“You’re the only spiderman who isn’t funny, we’re supposed to be funny.” He’s not wrong there, well, at least my spiderman is funny!
“The fate of the multiverse—”
“You always lose me with that. You say the fate of the multiverse and my brain dies.” Miguel handed Mayday back to Peter after she had unceremoniously fallen into his arms whilst Peter was talking.
“You smell that? Mayday took a crap.” Peter swung back to Miles, Gwen and Hobie and made a makeshift changing table out of web.
“So did MJ take you back or?” Miles questioned.
“Well-not exac—” He then smelt Mayday’s diaper. “Yep, she’s a Parker. That’s what happens when a Parker eats an avocado.”
“And yet I still married one.” I attached one of my hooks and allowed myself to be lowered down in front of Miguel’s pretentious staircase.
“Wow.” All 3 teens exclaimed at the same time. I strutted forward clad in my costume. God, it had been a long time since I’d had it on, but it felt so good. It made me feel strong and powerful. Even the ice blonde wig of curls, (that always appeared every time I put on the black cat suit for some reason), fell down my back and flicked with each step. My heeled boots clicked as I walked. Some people *cough Miguel cough* may think they’re impractical for fighting but I guess you just have to be an amazing fighter to pull them off.
“Miles meet my wife, y/n Parker. Or. The Black Cat.”
“Hobie, Gwen, good to see you again. Miles, it’s so great to meet you! Peter talks about you constantly.” I embraced him tightly.
I jumped over to Hobie and spider punk lifted me up into his arms.
“How’s my favourite vigilante!”
“I’m doing good how are you.”
“Still taking a crap on the establishment.”
“I’d like to help you.”
“I will take you up on that.” And he slipped a bunch on junk into my pocket. I didn’t understand but when it came to Hobie, I knew I eventually would.
“I don’t think ‘constantly’ is the most accurate word –“ Peter interrupted. He never liked seeing me with Hobie. He made him insecure, but I would assure him he was cool in his own way.
“Did you or did you not say to me last night ‘I miss Miles so much more with each passing day.’”
“I wouldn’t say in those words—”
“No. those were you’re exact words.” I had walked over to him when I began speaking.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
He brought me into him in a bruising kiss.
“I thought you weren’t working today?” As he spoke, Mayday recognised my presence and began to whine loudly for me to pick her up. Which I did happily.
“Well, I woke up and my baby wasn’t in her crib? How weird?” I bounced Mayday up and down in my arms and she shrieked excitedly with each new movement.
“Wait, you’re not a spider-person?” Miles suddenly questioned.
“God no! I couldn’t think of anything wo—” I trailed off when I looked around at the disapproving faces.
“I mean no, I’m a black cat. We’re in every spider’s universe in some respect. In everyone we’re in love with Peter Parker. He only loves us back in a few.” I looked back to find my husband already gazing back at me. Both of us might as well have had little hearts in our eyes.
I unleashed the claws from my gloves. “See, no web. Just claws.” Mayday clapped when I did that. “You like that baby? You like mummy’s powers!” I threw a hook with a line attached to it onto Miguel’s consoles. “But I did have to get these to keep up with you people and your webs.” I swung on the line and dropped gracefully, close to Miguel, just to annoy him.
“Yeah, but those claws are no joke one time we were in the middle of—” “Peter!” I scolded him. Peter then whispered to Miles “I ended up having to get stitches down my back.” Miles grimaced when he realised the context. Miles then continued his previous thought.
“I meant if you’re not a spider-person how did you get a pass? You’re not even a spider and you got a pass before me!”
“I felt with her skills and expertise she would be—”
“Don’t lie Miguel. I stole the bracelet off of you and you can’t get it back from me.”
“It was my choice to let you keep it.” I waited a beat before gesturing to Miles that it really wasn’t.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
 Miguel was explaining canon events to Miles and was showing all the spider-people the most horrific moments from their lives. When the Uncle Ben scene was shown I cradled my husband’s head in my neck to shield him from the other’s eyes. Mayday didn’t understand what was going on but had fallen silent when she had felt the sadness in her father’s body.
I zoned out of Miguel and Miles’ argument. I knew their plan and I knew about Miles. He didn’t deserve this, any of this. He was a good kid; I knew this because Peter told me he was good and I believe him. I focused only on my husband and my daughter. My daughter more so, so she didn’t have to be exposed to the fight that I felt was about to break out.
I bounced Mayday up and down and cooed to her as Peter explained to Miles that if Uncle Ben hadn’t died, many of them would’ve never become who they were meant to be and the lives they had saved would be gone.
Miles began to get more agitated when he realised, they were all asking him to let his father die. I scoffed to myself. They really expected this to work. It was hardly a sound argument.
“You can’t ask me not to save my father.”
“I’m not asking.” Suddenly, Miguel had trapped Miles. Woah. This was too far.
“Miguel that’s not funny! Let him go right now.” I held Mayday into my chest to shield her from her mummy’s harsh words.
“You don’t scare me.”
“I think we both know I do.” He turned away from me. I knew it.
Miles was panicking in the box as the audience around him screamed and argued. I was still holding Mayday as Peter had stern words with Miguel. Hobie winked at me and gestured me to come over. I saw what he was looking at, which were the little sparks coming from Miles’ fingertips. I showed Miles what he was doing wrong and laid my palm flat in front of me, as the other held Mayday’s bum up. Miles righted his hands and the electricity bubbled up. I smirked.
The cage erupted around him. The spider-people began to organise under Miguel’s command to seize Miles. A portal opened up behind Hobie.
“For the record. I quit.” He sauntered in backwards. That was my queue.
“Well, I gotta head.”
“You’re going?” Peter questioned.
“Yeah.”
“So, you just came to annoy Miguel and show Miles how to escape?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“God. I love you so much!” He kissed me hard. I handed Mayday back to her Daddy and she happily complied.
“Get a picture of her first chase?”
“You got it.” He pulled down her knitted spiderman beanie and took off. I opened up another portal.
“DO YOU WANT CHICKEN OR FISH TONIGHT?”
“CHICKEN PLEASE, HONEY!” My husband shouted back as he swung off with my baby in his baby carrier ready to save a 15-year-old spider-kid from a million other spider-people. Because that’s a totally normal sentence to say.
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Bit different from my usual stuff but this just randomly popped into my head!
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horangboosadan · 6 months
Text
ROCK WITH YOU [8/10]
episode eight: so let me listen to all your emotions
pairing: idol!lee chan x gender neutral!actor!reader
genre: established relationship, fluff, angst, best friend!jun, actor au, smau, on screen lovers off screen besties, intentional lowercase
synopsis: after the release of your most recent drama, the world decides that you and your co-star/best friend would be the perfect couple. the influx of positive reactions are great for your career, his career, and the drama. however, it tears at you to lie to your fans and appear dishonest towards your boyfriend. being a k-pop idol, revealing your relationship can come with unforeseen consequences. how do you tackle the onslaught of people who want the inside scoop of you and your co-star, and your boyfriend in denial about his jealousy without compromising either relationship?
wc: 2.1k
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the sound of the code being punched and the melody that sings when it's correct jolts you out of your half-sleep state. the creak of the door opening and the click of it closing has you shake your head. the soft footsteps making their way in your direction has your brain hurt as your mind filters through a million thoughts that have so far kept you from sleeping since you came home.
maybe it’s for the better―you get a chance for your circadian rhythm to adapt back to where it’s supposed to be.
“i brought food,” says chan as he enters the living room. he smiles; a huge grin that seems to lighten every load on your shoulders and clear your mind of whatever fears were coursing through it. the grin stays all the way over to the couch, only disappearing as he leans down to press a kiss to your lips. “i missed you.”
“i missed you, too.” you return his smile. “and i love you for bringing food because i haven’t really eaten anything all day.”
he sets the bag of food on the coffee table and seats himself next to you on the couch. “thought so. i wasn’t sure you’d even be awake.”
“somehow, i was too exhausted to even sleep,” you say. you’re half joking, but you’re aware of the slight nervousness in your voice. chan usually picks up on it, but you’re not sure if he’ll chalk it up to exhaustion or realize that there is something on your mind keeping you from resting.
“then we eat and go to sleep. we both need it.” he kisses you, and starts to take the food out of the bag.
your heart hammers in its cage. there’s a nagging feeling at the back of your mind telling you there isn’t anything to worry about, that you’ve been seeing things in his messages because you want to, because you know you won’t stand up for your own discomfort when it comes to the whole leaning into a romantic interest in jun. however, the moment chan says anything, you’ll do something. maybe seungkwan and vernon were wrong.
yet, there’s that pit in your stomach that keeps telling you that chan isn’t his normal self. his unusual long time in answering texts, his lack of trying to find time to actually talk after your first week away, his short answers, and his sudden lack of emojis whenever he said ‘i love you’ or ‘i miss you’. a part of you wants to tell yourself your just reading into it, that your exhaustion is taking over, but your gut says differently.
you’ve always trusted your gut.
“tell me about your trip,” says chan as he hands you a pair of chopsticks, already broken apart and ready to use.
you shake your head. “hmm, it was nice. a lot of bad weather, but that was the reason we shot there in the first place, apparently. the cast is nice, the crew was nice, and everything went very smoothly, but mostly i couldn’t enjoy myself due to a lack of sleep and breaks. i had a few on set, but my role is big enough that i didn’t have as much time to sit down as i wanted to.” you stop talking by starting to eat, figuring it can be a good excuse to not say anything else.
chan doesn’t say anything, but he’s looking intently at you. his gaze makes you feel loved, but it also feels piercing, as if he can see right through you. see your worries. see your exhaustion. “eat up, okay? you look like you need a good nights sleep.”
“thanks for the compliment," you say and huff jokingly.
“i didn’t mean it like that!” he says quickly. he takes your free hand with his and uses his thumb to caress the back of your hand. “you always look good, okay?”
you pout and look down. you both know it’s an act, but you like doing it. you like having him dote on you, which is exactly what he proceeds to do as he cups your face with both hands and lifts your head so you look at him. “you’re the most gorgeous, beautifulest, prettiest, handsomest, whatever adjective you want, person in the world.” with each adjective, he presses a kiss to your lips, and he continues after until you stop pouting and your lips draw into a smile.
“and even more so when you smile,” he adds and kisses you again.
it helps. it helps you regain energy, and it helps some of those worries slip away. whatever this jealousy thing is―if vernon is correct―you know that you’re not going to lose chan because of it.
all the tension in your veins seeps out. the thought of how much chan loves you, of how much you love him, fills them with warmth instead. a soft, cuddly warmth that doubles when chan puts an arm around you and drags you into his side.
you eat like that for a while, snuggled up together. chan feeds you bites of food, and you’re pretty sure you’re gonna fall asleep. however, as the food runs out, your worries haven’t disappeared enough for you to let go of them.
“i’ll clean up, okay? just get ready for bed and i’ll see you in there.” chan lets go of you. the warmth of his arm disappears and he gets up to start gathering the trash.
he doesn’t get far before you grab his hand and pull him back down onto the couch. “not yet,” you say.
chan laughs and pulls you in for a hug. “you missed me that much?”
you lightly punch at him, not letting go of the hug as you nod. maybe you are holding him back for another reason, but you did really miss him that much. so much you don’t want to let go of him, so much that you couldn’t be happier with the knowledge that you have all of tomorrow to spend together.
“yeah, i did,” you say as you pull out of the hug, “but there is something else.”
chan cocks his head. “something’s wrong?”
you grimace and shrug. “i don’t know.” the words won’t come. you don’t want to startle him, to scare him, to have him withdraw because he doesn’t want to discuss it. what if seungkwan’s right and he feels stupid for his feelings and therefore won’t talk about them? but you’ve been together for two years already, you know how to be honest with each other.
“okay, so, i just need to know how you feel about this whole dating rumor between me and jun,” you say. “i know you said you’re fine, but i want you to be completely honest.”
“i’m fine.” chan smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “i mean it. it’s fine. i know that it’s not true, and whatever the world may think, i know the truth.”
you want to believe him. you want to just say, ‘okay, let’s go to bed’, but you know he’s not telling the truth. “you don’t have to be fine with it.” you swallow, trying to keep your voice level, clear, and without the shake to it you can hear so well. you’re an actor, you should be able to do this, but somehow, without a camera, you never manage to. “i mean it. you don’t have to be fine with it. i wouldn’t be. i would hate seeing you with someone else. i would hate it even more if everyone wanted you to be with someone else. babe, i get jealous of you flirting with carats on lives and fancalls.”
the silence is loud. chan avoids your gaze, looking instead at his hands as he fiddles with the strings of his hoodie. you take his hand, intertwining your fingers and squeezing. “it’s okay.”
his voice is barely above a whisper when he speaks. “it’s stupid,” he says, and your heart breaks.
“it’s not stupid.” you use your other hand to lift his head up to look at you. “i am telling you, whatever you’re feeling, it is not stupid.”
“i don’t like it. i don’t like feeling this way, i don’t like seeing everyone talk about you, i don’t like all the comments about the two of you. they even asked on my live, about you and jun. i think i did well not to make it obvious, but i hated it. but it’s so stupid to feel this way when i know you and jun, and i know you’d never think of each other that way.” he sniffles. a tear runs down his cheek. you wipe it away. “seeing people talk about you as if you’re with someone else makes me feel like i don’t matter.”
you pull him close in a tight hug. he buries his head in the crook of your neck. “baby, i’m sorry,” you say. his arms tightens around you, holding you as close as possible. you don’t pull away, waiting for him to decide when he doesn’t need a hug anymore.
it lasts for what feels like forever and the blink of an eye at the same time. a mixture of feelings spread out through your body. you can’t tell what it is, can’t tell how you’re feeling as chan pulls out of your hug. somehow, you know what you want to do next;
make sure all these rumors and theories and whatever they are stop.
“i love you, you know that, right?” you ask. you lean your forehead against his.
“i know. i love you, too.” he kisses you. you kiss back, keeping him close before he pulls away.
it’s still a short kiss, but it has you remember all the things you love about him. the way he smiles, the way he talks, the way he dances, the way he laughs. all the things that had you fall for him in the first place, the reason why it hurts you so much to see him hurting.
when you pull away, you only have one thought on your mind.
“do you wanna tell the world?”
it’s a big question. going public about your relationship could jeopardize your careers. it will have more consequences for his as an idol than yours as an actor, and it would put you both in the limelight for something other than what you want to be there for. you’ve worked hard to keep your relationship private, to keep your private life out of the public eye. but that one kiss and this whole conversation made you realize that you love chan enough to risk it.
chan pulls away. he takes your hand in his and intertwines your fingers. “i want everyone to know how much i love you,” he says. “but are you sure?”
you shrug. “i don’t know what might happen if we do, but you’re hurting so much because of all this talk about me and jun that i don’t know how else to battle it. there’s still so much of it that im not sure if it will blow over when the drama ends.” you take a deep breath and smile. “and i love you so much that i’m willing to risk whatever consequences may come.”
“really?” there’s something hopeful in his voice, something ready to agree. “you’re absolutely sure?”
“yes. i love you and i want the whole world to know.” you kiss him. “it’s not like we’d be announcing it right this second, and we can still think about it, but maybe that’s the next step.”
chan grins. “i love you, too.” he presses a kiss to the back of your hand, fingers still entwined. “does this mean i can openly flirt with you at all times?”
“i guess.” you laugh. “but the deal is you stop overusing that smirk emoji.”
“i love that emoji. it gets the point across.”
“well, i don’t need it to know what you’re trying to say, though. i know exactly what’s on your mind.” you smile, a giddy feeling now coursing through your veins. “also, you have to stop saying sleep whenever you don’t actually mean to sleep.”
chan fakes a shocked look. “what? you want me to say sex every time? even in front of other people?”
you hit him lightly. “i don’t want you to talk about it in front of other people at all,” you say and start to get up from the couch. “c’mon. let’s clean up, go to bed, and maybe i’ll have enough energy to sleep tomorrow.”
chan pulls you back down by your hands still entwined. “we can always sleep now,” he says, and kisses the corner of your mouth.
there is no one in the entire world you love more then lee chan, and he continues to make you love him more every single day. even with the nervous tension that comes with revealing your relationship to the public, the prospect of your future together looks brighter than ever.
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boo talks
a written chapter for a change. they finally talked! i really like this chapter but my god is the change between doing texting and actually writing it out hard at times (i think i rewrote this like three times before i was happy with it, and im still not actually sure im happy with it...) anyways, im currently on christmas break from uni (finally done with exams and at least one went well and we'll see), which may mean more one shots and hopefully a christmas themed one? idk, but i hope...
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strangelittlestories · 4 months
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Ever since I rose from the pseudo-dead to find Britain in its time of direst need, I have found myself prone to occasional fits of melancholy.
(Not that I’m bitter. Oh no. I’m thrilled to find myself alone, barring the company of a sentient oversized steak knife, subbing for dear-old-daddy Arthur’s destiny.)
These occasional funks are perhaps to be expected. After all, the experience of being a spirit subsumed by the earth was a dreamlike and peaceful quasi-non-existence. Don’t get me wrong, I kept myself informed of all your drama … but when you’re getting your news by slowly subsuming the brains and bones of the deceased, it kinda comes one step removed.
It was *nice* to have that emotional disconnect. To have a bit of a buffer from the trials and tribulations of inhabiting an organic body with screaming nerves and chemicals rushing about to yell about *feelings*.
Even in the information age - when phone lines and broadband cables began dumping data into the earth - it was a pleasant phantasmagoria of media and gossip.
So waking up in a fresh flesh form, with all that messy live-streamed molecular input … it was a bit of a rollercoaster to readjust. And, if I’m being honest, I don’t think I ever really got a handle on it the first time.
So … yeah, it came with these intense bouts of listless sadness. They felt like, I dunno, like you wandered into a thick fog, but it’s not really fog. It’s a bruise on the face of reality, all purple and yellow and blotchy and sore … and you’re in the middle of it.
And, sure, that feeling is probably par for the course. The surprising bit - and I blame all the memelords I absorbed through the wires for this - is that when I’m feeling this way, I get weirdly *punny*.
Like, the other day, I was thinking about how annoying it is to be stuck with Excalibur, right? This asshole - aside from being remarkably talkative for a shined-up chunk of ore - is a constant reminder of all the family baggage.
And I was thinking:,isn’t it funny that my dad’s ex-girlfriend, a powerful fae and spirit of literal destiny, gifted him a sword called Excalibur.
As if to say to his future partners: I got him a whole-ass magic sword that proclaimed his fate as the one king to rule them all. That’s the ‘calibre’ of ‘ex’ that you’re dealing with, so suck it Guinevere.
(Get it? Ex-calibre?)
Then I wondered: what if dad only dated the Lady for the magic sword?
I guess that’s human men for you. They only want one thing. They’re always just trying to get blade.
…and, inexplicably, wordplay like this makes me feel *better*. And not, y’know, like a monster of the highest order (which, let us not forget, a lot of people think I am).
Wild.
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