#my family is so hateful i can't believe i have to be stuck here with them

[xplrsworld]

.

[littletism]

what my life is like as a permaregressor, and common misconceptions!

cw: long post!

being a permaregressor i think is sometimes viewed as a want by a lot of people in the community. i see many posts of people saying they wish they were permaregressors, how awesome life would be to be one, etc.

and that's fine! im not here to tell you i hate my life as a permaregressor, far from it. but it's definitely not all sunshine and rainbows, at all.

for those who don't know, i am a teen permaregressor. bodily i am 20 years old, but i am permanently regressed to about 13-16. this means i never really leave this headspace. i never grew up.

so, what's it like? not really all that different from the life of any other adult, really. i'd say the big major differences are that i don't feel like i relate to any other adults around me, and i have a more childlike/naive view on a lot of things than other people my age. i'd say it pretty heavily affects my stress levels though. i am also wildly more immature than people my age.

do i have the ability to act my age? absolutely. masking is a thing permaregressors are more than capable of doing. i have to mask in order to get through life, especially as someone who works full time to provide for myself and help out my family with bills and such.

it's really hard being a permaregressor in the real world, though. i have a pretty busy life outside of tumblr, i work, i take care of my pets, i see my family often, i go out with friends often, i do the grocery shopping for the house by myself a lot of the time, etc! its really quite stressful to do all of these big adult tasks when you feel smaller than everyone around you.

one big problem i see permaregressors who are bodily adults face, is the constant Infantilization we receive, often from other regressors. because we never fully leave our headspaces, we're told we can't do adult things because we can't consent (ex; to things like alcohol or drugs or other adult stuff). this is horrendously untrue, and many of us do not want to be treated like we're actual children. many of us WANT to lead normal adult lives. of course i want to be treated like im little when im regressed to a toddler or a kiddo, of course i wouldn't want to do adult stuff in THOSE headspaces, because they aren't permanent! i'm stuck like this for the rest of my life, and i shouldn't let it define me or force me to be a certain way. im bodily an adult and therefore i expect to be treated like one when in my permaregressed headspace.

i truly do believe this community should be a bit more educated on permaregression. i think people definitely look at it with rose-colored glasses. i also hope no one, especially other permaregressors, found this post to be too pessimistic! i love being a permaregressor, and i think everyone who is one should be allowed to love being one as well.

xoxo

[suiana]

Hey!! I hope that you are having an amazing day 💞💞💞 If requests are open, may you please write some hsr yandere!Sunday headcannons?

✎ yandere! sunday headcanons . . .

✎ warnings . . .

― possessiveness, manipulation, obsessiveness etc.

(gn! reader x male yandere! character)

✎ yandere! sunday who can't help but adore you. he'd never have thought someone who'd capture his heart would be so near to him! right here in the heart of penacony! of course he's going to talk to you! what, did you think he'd just ignore someone who's got his attention?

✎ yandere! sunday who is extremely touchstarved and probably fell for you because you hugged him once and told him he was cool. yeah bird man liked how warm your hug felt, what about it?

✎ yandere! sunday who gets to know you better as the perfect family head. surely you'd fall for him, right? i mean, he's perfect in every single way. you'd be a fool to reject him. and of course u rejected him😜🙏

✎ yandere! sunday who's absolutely flabbergasted when you reject his proposal to be his. what? are you serious? out of his league? duh he knows that- you're supposed to be thankful that he proposed the idea and accept!

✎ yandere! sunday who hates it when things don't go his way. he's a perfectionist and everything has to go according to plan... oh wow would you look at that? you went against his plans and rejected him! even said you wanted to be friends... hah! he couldn't believe you said that! you don't know how hard he bit down on his tongue to prevent himself from cursing at you.

✎ yandere! sunday who subtly changes the way he acts towards you. no, he's not acting passive aggressive. you're just delusional. what do you mean he's glaring at you? it's just the angle silly!

✎ yandere! sunday who obviously looks over you with his weird robot bird drone things. they resemble a real bird fairly closely (save for the Family crest he has embedded in them) and he'd be an idiot to not have an eye on you 24/7.

✎ yandere! sunday who's an obsessive freak and you'd think you'd know how obsessive he is by now but... it's far more worse than what you'd expect. bro has a whole ass shrine dedicated to you, and you just know that he has a small dreamscape designed for you. bro will throw you in there if you misbehave 💀

✎ yandere! sunday who gets other people to do the dirty work for him. he's a man of status, why would he need to dirty his hands? plus, he hates it when things get dirty. how uncouth.

✎ yandere! sunday who always has a smile on his face. you bet your ass he's going to be smiling when he tells you that your family mysteriously died in the dreamscape. of course, he's going to feign sympathy and comfort you but... there certainly won't be a frown on that gorgeous face of his.

✎ yandere! sunday who gracefully accepts you into his arms when you come crying to him that you can't leave. oh you poor thing. you did the wrong right thing coming to him for help. he'll definitely help you through this tough time. by making it worse 💗

✎ yandere! sunday who molds you into his perfect lover. oh dear me, you're permanently stuck in the dreamscape with him! it's an error no one has experienced before and you need to stay here with him to ensure your safety! no it's not a lie, why would he do that? after all, he only wants the best for you. don't worry, you can pass time by being his cute darling for now!

✎ yandere! sunday who will never let you go. and... why would you want to escape in the first place? he loves you and you love him now, don't you? besides, he's sweet, handsome, charming... you will never find someone better than him. so don't misbehave and just stay with him, won't you? besides, the Family doesn't tolerate traitors in the slightest. and you're a part of the family now, aren't you? his beloved little darling ♡

✎ "oh dear, now where do you think you're going my love?"

[georgeclarkesgf]

forgetful | george clarke

the minute george stepped into the flat, he knew something was off.

"y/n? you here?" walking further into the flat, he found y/n in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea, "hey, sorry i'm back so late. we missed t-"

"don't. i can't believe you. all i asked was that you not plan to film today and i wake up to a message telling me you've gone to film a video for arthur. do you even know why i asked you to stay home today?"

he was trying to remember, really he was. but his mind was blank and the guilt began to seep in, only just noticing the tears that left stains on her cheeks.

"no. of course you don't. my parents are in town george. i planned a nice lunch, maybe go on a walk, come back to the flat for a few drinks, but all that went to shit because you left to film a stupid video and then ignored my messages all day. you know how important it is to me that you get along with my parents so having to cancel on them last minute because you weren't even here was not something i wanted to have to do." the tears in her eyes were threatening to fall again, hating how needy and pathetic she sounded.

"we can sti-" george tried, again quickly being shut down.

"no george, i'm mad at you. you don't get to say it'll be alright and that we can still do something. we're not playing happy families. you've hurt me. when we sort this out, then we organise something else."

now the guilt was in full swing and he immediately started to think of ways he could make it up to her, knowing it would take a lot of grovelling to get back onto her good side.

"i'm going to bed, i love you." a soft kiss being placed on his lips.

"i love you too." slight relief evident on his face, knowing she'll never not say 'i love you', even during an argument.

she rounded the kitchen island, starting to make her way to his room and get ready for bed. george watched as she closed the door, still stood in the kitchen, contemplating whether to follow her or give her some space.

he decided on the latter.

--------

it was nearing midnight when george decided he needed some sleep, and the dip in the bed as he got comfortable was enough to wake y/n, a groan leaving her lips.

"sorry. i didn't mean to wake you," she let out an agitated hum of acknowledgement and rolled over, curling into george's side, unable to resist the heat his body always provided, "still mad at me?"

"yep." she responded, accentuating the 'p'.

"okay. can we talk about it?"

"i've said my peace. you go."

"i really am sorry sweetheart, i feel awful," her nails were running along the lines and dips of his stomach, a habit he'd grown accustomed to over the several months they'd been together, "the video was planned ages ago and i didn't even realise the dates clashed. when you reminded me of 'that thing' that was happening today i thought you meant filming. i promise to make it up to you. and your parents. please say they don't hate me."

george hoped it was enough, not that he wouldn't do anything she asked to get her to forgive him, but he couldn't stand the thought of her staying mad at him.

in y/n's head, he was forgiven. during her time alone, she realised she didn't even give him a chance to explain before locking herself in his room for the rest of the night.

"i'm sorry too," george was slightly taken aback by this, unsure what she was apologising for, "i shouldn't have stormed off like that. not even letting you speak before i disappeared all night. and my parents don't hate you. we can do dinner tomorrow if that's okay with you?"

"that's more than okay. i have my whole day free to spend with you and them. we can do whatever you guys want. i love you."

"i love you. so much. even if you are forgetful."

and george stuck to his promise. safe to say y/n's parents like george more than her.

a/n have this as an 'i'm sorry i haven't posted in a while present' <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for getting a pet one of my parents is allergic to and/or planting plants that would attract them?

Pretty short one, honestly. I'm currently living with my parents and younger siblings. Ages aren't particularly important, just know that everyone involved is an adult except my youngest sibling, who just reached teenagerdom, and the rest of us "kids" are stuck living at home without any real way to get places of our own.

What some of my siblings know, to varying degrees, and that my parents either don't know or are willfully ignorant towards, is that I am so far removed from my parents' political views that it's like listening to an alien way of thinking whenever one of them brings politics up. I've gotten very good at shutting up and letting them think what they want to about me- with how hard they project, they probably think I'm exactly like them. In reality I just don't think minorities should be considered "hate crimes against God" and think they're insane for believing as much.

Sure doesn't help that I'm in multiple categories of minorities that they consider "hate crimes against God" lmao

One of them, in particular, has gone into detail multiple times about what he thinks should be done to people like me or those who support them. It's, uh…not pretty. Let's just say he thinks fascism is perfectly fine and leave it at that.

When I move out- because I refuse to be stuck here forever- I'm hoping to be financially stable enough to afford a pet. I'm considering a snake, or maybe a bird, or a cat. Not all at once, obviously. However, when we were growing up, we only ever had dogs. The fascist parent is allergic to cats, so I can count on one hand the number of cats I've ever actually interacted with, and I'd need more than two hands and two feet to count the number of "throw the kittens in a sack and toss them into the river" "jokes" I've had to suffer through over the years.

I'm pretty sure there's no saving this familial connection. I want to tell them both who I am, but I can't do that until I have my own place because I know they're gonna react really fucking badly. They've told me so themselves.

…which brings me to my question. I guess it's not so much "WIBTA for encouraging the presence of animals one of my parents is allergic to as a measure to keep them away" and more "WIBTA for getting a pet that my parents might dislike enough to try and get rid of" iykwim.

What are these acronyms?

[gingiesworld]

Obsessions (6/6)

Wanda Maximoff x Rogers Fem Reader

Warnings : angst. Fluff.

Taglist: @sytoran @ginnsbaker @gb12d @lifespectator @natashamaximoff-69 @wizardofstories @canvascoloredin

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5

18+ MINORS DNI

AN: I have decided to leave it here so I may do a sequel series to this. Showing how Y/N and Wanda's friendship grows before turning into something more. Might be more than a mini series like this though :)

Wanda remained true to her word, she stuck by Y/N's side. Even as she watched her from afar as Y/N had to greet all of Peggy's family and friends.

"You really care for her." Sharon stated as she joined Wanda. The two had met briefly as Y/N shared Peggy's last moments.

"I do." Wanda admitted.

"Have you ever thought of telling her?" Sharon questioned as Wanda sighed.

"She knows now how I feel but that is a whole new story." Wanda chuckled as Sharon observed the woman beside her. "I had done some things that I am not proud of, I broke promises to her and abandoned her when I should have just been honest with her and myself."

"I'm sure it will all work out fine." Sharon told her. "Y/N can be stubborn, just like Aunt Peggy." She turned to watch as Y/N took a deep breath before heading outside. "Just give her time." Sharon told Wanda as she noticed her about to follow. "She needs time alone too."

"I can't leave her." Wanda told her as Sharon gave her a gentle smile.

"Y/N prefers to mourn alone, she kept to herself while she was mourning Uncle Steve." Sharon told her. "Smothering her will only push her further away."

"So you know about everything." Wanda stated as Sharon nodded.

"I do." She confirmed. "Y/N is my only cousin and I want to be there for her. So I became someone she could talk to about everything. So I know from the moment you abandoned her to the summer she read your letter."

"Why don't you hate me?" Wanda questioned as Sharon chuckled.

"I wanted to." She told her. "Believe me, but it seems that the two of you have your own bullshit you need to work through, and I have known how she looks at you, ever since you were kids." Sharon turned to see Y/N re-enter the room and head straight for the bar. "She has always loved you more than anyone would think is possible, but she is afraid."

"Why?" Wanda questioned as Sharon finished her drink.

"That isn't really for me to say." She told her before heading to the bar herself. Wanda decided to head out for some fresh air, remembering all of the times Y/N had helped her growing up, all the ways she would gaze at her intensely as they would hold a conversation.

"I thought you left." Y/N spoke up from beside her, Wanda watched as Y/N lit up a cigarette.

"I didn't know you smoked." Wanda told her as Y/N smirked.

"There is a lot about me you don't know about Wanda." Y/N told her as she blew the smoke away from Wanda. "The Y/N you knew was a dumb kid who believed in other people and friendships. Since then, I have somewhat decided it isn't really worth letting your walls down for someone to come in and break you."

"Is that why you're so cold with me?" Wanda asked her confidently. "You think I am going to leave you?"

"You did before!" Y/N told her angrily. "So what's to say that you aren't going to do it again."

"Me!" Wanda yelled at her. "I am not leaving! I am not making that same mistake again!"

"Why?" Y/N questioned. "Why should I believe you?"

"Because I am in love with you!" Wanda screamed, her breathing rapidly as her heartbeat fast in her chest.

"You have to be joking." Y/N chuckled dryly. "This is some sick joke of yours."

"No." Wanda shook her head. "I am in love with you Y/N. I guess on some level I knew all along and I was scared. I was afraid of what everyone would say about me. My parents, Pietro, my friends and peers." She took a deep breath as Y/N really listened to her for the first time. "I was jealous of all of those girls who had you. I was obsessed even. I followed your social media under a fake account. All of the pictures you posted of your artwork, or landscapes of places you visited. Even pictures with Christine Palmer and other girls. I kept track of you and your activities."

"You stalked me?" Y/N asked her with a look of disgust on her face.

"No!" Wanda yelled.

"So is that what this is? You came here to be with me and see my mom before she passed, is this you stalking me?" Y/N questioned as Sharon stood by and watched the two argue.

"No!" Wanda told her. "I wanted to be here for you when you needed someone the most."

"I can't believe this." Y/N stepped away as Wanda's tears started to fall. "I." She shook her head as she looked at her cousin. "I need to go. I can't be here." She pointed at Wanda. "I want your things out of my room before midnight." With that she left as Sharon approached Wanda.

"She'll come around." Sharon told her. "She is just going through a lot right now and her emotions are everywhere."

"No she won't." Wanda whispered as she wiped her eyes. "I've truly lost her. I have lost my chance with her." Wanda soon followed Y/N, but made her way to the hotel. Booking the next flight back to New Jersey, ignoring the feeling of dread in her stomach.

When Y/N had returned to the hotel, Sharon was sitting on the bed, turning to face Y/N as she walked inside.

"She's gone." Sharon told her. "Just like you wanted."

"Good." Y/N mumbled as she took off her jacket.

"She is trying Y/N." Sharon told her. "Maybe you should just try and forgive her, be friends again."

"I am sick and tired of hearing those words from everyone!" Y/N yelled as she slammed her hand on the vanity table. "I have heard it since I first started college from people who don't understand the shit I went through because of her!"

"Y/N." Sharon tried as Y/N shook her head.

"You don't understand Sharon." Y/N told her, her shoulders slumped in defeat. "I loved her. I was in love with her and she broke my heart. No, she shattered my heart when she broke her promises. Many promises and I can't go through that pain again. I just can't."

"So you're just going to be alone for the rest of your life?" Sharon questioned as Y/N sighed.

"No." Y/N told her. "I am going to keep myself guarded for the rest of my life."

When Wanda's plane had landed, Pietro was there waiting for her, a sad smile on his face as he noticed his twins' defeated demeanor.

"I'm sorry Wanda." He told her softly as he took her bag from her.

"It's ok." She shrugged as the two left the airport. "I guess I deserve it really."

"No Wanda." Pietro tried as they approached his car.

"I do." Wanda told him firmly. "I abandoned her when I promised I wouldn't. I was jealous and vindictive. I was an ass all through high school and well, Y/N is gone." She looked out of the window. "Because of me." Pietro remained silent as he drove, leaving Wanda to think about things that have happened over the years.

As the years passed, Wanda had taken over her parent's cafè, her parents wanted to retire and travel for a while. Wanda had remained single as she threw herself into work. Little did she know that Y/N had returned, renting her own apartment.

Everyday Wanda saw the Impala drive by the cafè, but she thought it was her mind playing tricks. Especially since she thought about Y/N everyday since they parted ways. Thinking about where she is? Is she married? Does she have children? Every question remained unanswered until Wanda was about to close up the cafè. Seeing a figure in the door, her heart beating rapidly in her chest as she recognised the eyes. The eyes she had longed to look into after all of the years.

"Y/N?" She questioned as she let her in.

"I uh." Y/N stumbled on her words. "I was out, clearing my head and this was the first place that came to my mind."

"Do you want a coffee?" Wanda asked as she locked the door and put her bag and coat down.

"I actually need to talk to you. Apologise for the way I acted years ago." Y/N told her as Wanda took a deep breath.

"I'll make some tea." She told her as she retreated behind the counter. Getting two to go cups and boiling the kettle. "Where have you been?"

"I stayed in England for a year." Y/N told her as Wanda filled the cups. "Then I went back to college for my last year."

"That was six years ago, Y/N." Wanda stated as Y/N nodded. "Where have you been after college?"

"Around I guess." She shrugged as Wanda brought the tea over. "I was around South America for a while. Then Europe and Eastern Europe."

"How long have you been home for?" Wanda questioned as Y/N sighed.

"A year." She told her. "I bought myself a studio apartment, just big enough for me and my artwork."

"So you still draw?" She asked as Y/N nodded with a bright smile.

"I do." She smiled. "I managed to make a comic, with the help of a new writer."

"That's amazing." Wanda beamed as Y/N nodded.

"It's not popular so you probably haven't heard of it." Y/N shrugged as Wanda shook her head.

"Actually." Wanda stood up and went under the counter, holding up a small comic. "When I saw your name, I had to buy it."

"Wow." She smiled as she looked over the pages. "Thank you." She whispered as Wanda reached for her hand.

"I know these past eight years we haven't been in contact, but I never stopped supporting you." Wanda told her. "Hell, I was gutted when you closed down your instagram, I had no one to stalk." The two laughed as Y/N took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry for how I acted after my mom's funeral." Y/N started, shaking her head as Wanda tried to cut in. "I was a bitch. A ginormous bitch and I shouldn't have taken it out on you the way I did. You flew to England to be with me. You helped me from the moment you arrived and I fucking hurt you that day." She looked at Wanda, her eyes filled with guilt and self hatred. "I remember the look on your face. Even after you confessed your feelings, some part of me in that moment wanted to kiss you, right then but the anger, grief and all of those years of pain thought otherwise and I couldn't stop myself."

"I deserved it Y/N." Wanda whispered as Y/N shook her head no. "I did. I made your life a living hell because I couldn't get over my own insecurities."

"Shall we just start again?" Y/N questioned with a small smile. "You know, get to know each other as the people we are now?"

"I would like that." Wanda smiled.

"Hi, I'm Y/N Rogers." Y/N smiled goofily as Wanda giggled.

"Wanda Maximoff." She returned as she shook Y/N's hand in a playful manner. The two ready to start a new adventure and forgetting everything in the past.

[wonnieluvr]

forever with you

pairing -> grayson hawthorne x fem!reader

summary -> you break off your current relationship for grayson hawthorne, a past love. logically, you know you shouldn't but the heart wants what it wants.

warnings -> none :)

a/n -> some fluff for my love finally !! pt 3 of photographs of you and thinking of you

seeing grayson again had not been in your plans. at all. you didn't know how you were supposed to explain any of what had happened to your family or to your date. your boyfriend. it wasn't an engagement you had really wanted, just something that would put you a step further ahead in life and he was nice, he treated you well.

but he wasn't grayson. he wasn't your grayson.

that shouldn't have mattered, you mother reminded you harshly the minute word of your meeting reached your family. as you had returned to the gala your mother immediately cut in, having heard grayson's name, warning you not to make any rash decisions.

was it really a rash decision if you had been waiting years for a moment like this?

your date had quickly noticed the change in demeanour. he was swift to pull you away.

as you danced in a room full of people, it should have been him on your mind. he, who was touching you, holding you gently and dancing with you carefully. but it wasn't. no matter how hard you tried it wouldn't ever be.

"you love him" the words had startled you, but they weren't untrue. your boyfriend offered you a small smile, bittersweet and so understanding. you hated it. hated the way you had never fallen for one another. maybe then you would have had no trouble. it might have been simple. you had shared stories of those you had truly loved, first loves gone wrong. you had bonded over that. the hurt.

and here you were now, selfishly considering your second chance while he was stuck without one. "darling, you love him. you can't do anything about that" he dipped you softly, eyes saying everything as you stared at each other. "it's okay"

your eyes begun to water for the second time that night. "i can't do that to you" your voice was full of pain and sadness as you stood straight again. "i don't know if i can do this"

"stop it" he chided softly, brushing your hair back into place as you both paused in your dance. "you would tell me to take my chance if she came back to me. so, i'm doing the same for you. you deserve to be happy. it's okay"

your shoulders dropped slightly, pained and fighting your raging emotions. "but i-"

"sh, go to him" he held your cheeks in his hands for a moment, gently caressing your face, admiring your beauty. "but if he breaks your heart again, i don't care who he is i will kick his ass"

you laughed softly, humourless. you couldn't help the way your heart filled with such great sadness for the boy you had come to spend so much time with. but your grayson was waiting, the same way you had been these past years. you had a chance and you'd be damned if you didn't take it.

you had cursed the hawthorne boy for years. you had harboured hate for the whole family after what they had said to you. you loved gray, yes but it wasn't going to heal those wounds over night. breaking off your relationship for him was something your parents advised against, very strongly when you had told them what you were doing. your mother had tried to dissuade you, remind you off their cruel words, the way they had treated you.

"i can't just give up. i have to try, i love him" you had pleaded. they had shaken their heads but they understood what this meant to you. they had hated seeing their little girl so hurt but they couldn't deny the happiness that had come before that. the way life shone in you when you had been with grayson was something they had never seen since.

it was worth the chance if you believed it was.

you met with grayson a week later. both of you were nervous, unsure of what to say to one another. you had barely ever seen this side of gray, the one who worried and fretted, the one who cared so openly.

while he had shared smiles and murmured words of love to you he had never really showed you himself. he had never been brave enough to truly let you in. and now he was.

he stood before you now, normally steady hands holding out flowers to you with a slight tremor to them. he had shown up at your door, sudden but expected, with the hopes of rekindling your relationship.

"gray" you breathed out, eyes widening when you opened your door to his figure. he wore a suit, as usual, but no matter how many times you saw him, he never failed to make your heart flutter. "hi"

you offered him a small smile, neither of you knowing how to proceed.

he stared at you for a moment longer before he blinked slowly, coming back to reality.

"hello, these are for you" he spoke softly, he had never used the hawthorne tone with you. even if he did, you would never have needed him to. he only needed to ask and you would have done anything he wanted.

"thank you, they're beautiful" you ignored the heat in your cheeks as you took the bouquet from him, fingers brushing his. you disappeared inside for a moment, putting them away in a vase and grabbing your bag before returning to the door.

"shall we?" you asked, trying to appear more confident than you felt.

if he noticed your nervousness he didn't mention it, merely holding an arm out to you, leading you to the car. he was tense, you noted. he knew it would take more than flowers to win you over again. and he was desperate to win you over.

"where are we going?" you asked, once you were both seated in the car, buckling your seatbelt up before properly turning to him. he was already looking at you, gaze soft.

"where would you like to go?"

with anyone else you would have frowned. you would have taken that as a cop out, a hint that he didn't know you and that he hadn't put the proper effort in to make the date special.

but this was grayson. grayson who bled power and control. he had a plan for everything and he had always had backups. he was giving that control to you.

you smiled softly, a memory coming to mind immediately as you glanced out the window to take in the weather.

a storm was coming despite the heat.

"what about the beach?"

the scene between you two was exactly like that of when you had visited last. it was the same beach you remembered, practically empty as a summer storm threatened the peace. the wind whistled in the quiet, as you walked side by side.

neither of you spoke for moment before you found yourselves in a familiar alcove. you smiled at the memory, warmth filling you despite the cold sea breeze.

"do you remember?" you turned to the tall boy beside you. he, once again, already had his eyes on you, watching you walk. you could practically see the two of you in his eyes, the same colour of the sea as you had unknowingly posed for his camera back then.

"how could i forget?" he whispered quietly, his hand reaching out for your face, pausing before he could actually touch you.

you didn't speak, breath catching in your throat as you stared into his eyes. you felt like you were back there again. back when everything had been fine, when there was nothing holding you back.

"i'm sorry" his expression twisted, lips forming a frown as he glanced away. his hand dropped away from you. he didn't deserve to hold you, to love you. "i hurt you and i-"

"stop" you shook your head, taking his hand in yours, gently squeezing it. the sensation was as familiar as it was foreign. "you are not your family, gray. i'm here for you not them. yes, you hurt me when you didn't say anything but i know how much pressure you're under"

"that's not an excuse-" he begun again, hand clinging to yours.

"i'm not saying it is" you grinned a cheeky smile, trying to lighten the mood. "you have a lot of making up to do"

he just blinked at you, mind running rampant with ways he could possibly do that. your grin only widened as you spoke your next words.

"you can start with giving me a kiss" you reached your free hand up to tap your lips, puckering them playfully and awaiting his move.

he didn't stay frozen for much longer, how could he ever refuse you? he let his own smile grow as he leaned down to capture your lips in a sweet kiss.

he pulled back first, but he couldn't move far, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck, holding him close. his hands automatically moved to your waist.

"i have a few more requests to make before i can forgive you" you announced into the centimetres between you. "but i think i need a few more kisses first"

he released a small laugh, eyes shining as he watched your lips move. "is that so?" he hummed, dipping down again to press his mouth to yours. he paused before he could, murmuring lowly. "and how long do i have to complete these requests, darling?"

"forever, gray"

-

the hawthorne empire's heir, grayson hawthorne, is rumoured to be dating. find out more here.

"well, shit"

[gretahayes]

Favourite tim drake recs? :0

Assuming you mean fanfic recs, I've got probably the most for him and this is long, so it's going under the cut;

This is genuinely one of my favorites, it's set post-Red Robin, and deals with Tim's vigilante stalking habits, his family finding out, Cass realizing there's no photos of Tim, them setting out to take/find some of him (a much harder feat than you'd think) and finally, Tim seeing the photos. It's amazing and sweet, and I can't recommend it enough. (I especially like the Bruce & Tim and Tim & Damian in this)

This is by the same author, also set post-Red Robin. This is Damian and Tim focused, Damian POV, in which Damian sees Bruce's contingency plans for him and the rest of the family, and with nobody else to turn to, runs for Tim. Canon divergent in the way Bruce doesn't have a contingency for his children, neither does Tim for his team, or them for him, but it kinda makes sense in this setting. Their interactions are amazing here, and seems so real.

In this, Tim gets a tonsillectomy. An elaboration in the form of a long fic. A must-read, I feel. It's funny and has so many feels and such good characterization.

!!! Can't believe I almost forgot about this one! Tim is Bruce's assistant, not son, and never became a vigilante. He's incredibly overworked, but no less dedicated to the Waynes. It's heartwrenching and sweet and funny and—words can't do it justice. It's a must read. The Al Ghuls make a cameo but Tim knows how to deal with them. Tim's deeply sad but next to nobody knows and those that do just accept it (including him). Kon is the MVP. Cass. Damian and Tim have an odd bond built of mutual respect and disdain for everyone around them. Luthor tries to recruit Tim every year and fails.

This is funny and amazing—Tim lands in a universe where he's technically considered a drug addict, since coffee is a drug and in the regular universe everyone drinks it.

The YJ fic Ever. I've recced this at least three times, and I will continue to. It's amazing characterization all around—both YJ and batfam—and genuinely is so fun. I love everyone in this. When an unknown enemy threatens Robin, Gotham's vigilantes come together to keep him safe. Unfortunately, they're protecting the wrong Robin. Or: Tim Drake plans his own rescue. Things get complicated.

This is Tim & Damian—Tim gets his overprotective big brother moment :) love love LOVE the way everyone is written here.

This is short and hilarious—Tim has amnesia after a head wound (can only remember back to his YJ days) and tries to bullshit his way out of anyone noticing. He might have succeeded if not for Cass.

This is a time loop fic, switching POVs. Tim's stuck in a time loop in which Jason always dies. The loop before the one this was set in, he accidentally kills Damian out of stress and too-fast reflexes. He breaks down when he sees Damian again, the whole thing unravels, and they resolve to help him out of it.

THIS SERIES MAKES ME FERAL. Jack, Tim and sometimes Dana, set when Jack made Tim quit from Robin. Horror-type elements and beautifully poetic, but centered around Jack's POV of the son he realizes he doesn't know, and him realizing he may be a shit dad. Dana's the best stepmom ever, and Tim's far nicer to her than he is Jack. This is the first work, in which Jack tries and fails to understand this Tim, and realizes that this Tim is Robin, not Tim. This is the second (and last) work in the series, in which Tim hasn't fully quit the lifestyle even though he's not going out as Robin, but Jack has no proof he hasn't. Just a hunch and a few odd occurrences that us, the readers, who are familiar with Tim's hero life will find obvious, but Jack does not. Dana makes Tim happier, more Tim than Tim-Robin, than Jack does, and Jack hates it. Near the end, he starts calling Tim Robin, not Tim. I LOVE it. Even if you hate Jack (like I do) you need to read this, for the Tim characterization if nothing else. Outsider POV, except he shouldn't be an outsider. But he is.

This is so fucking funny. Tim gets a matching tattoo with Kon, and hides it from Bruce. When Bruce—and the rest of his family—find out, all goes to hell.

Remember when I said the Jack and Tim series was only slightly horror? This is horror. Bruce's got a habit of picking up monsters, and this one is about Tim. If you're sensitive to horror, please read the tags and maybe avoid it, because this is delightful but not for everyone.

In this, Tim becomes an unintentional sugar daddy to the caped community. It's a bit iffy in some places, but hilarious.

This is Dick and Tim (surprised it took me this long to rec one with them as the main focus tbh) and it's Dick checking up on his little brother. Pure fluff, and genuinely amazing.

This is Tim & Bruce but also Tim & Tam in some places. Bruce forgets Tim is the majority shareholder for WE and is thus invited to shareholder meetings, Tim finds this very amusing and is generally a menace. You can FEEL the teenager in this Tim. Amazing.

Tim's de-aged to a kid in this, and re-meets his family. Fluff and feels ensue.

This is Bruce and Tim. Bruce isn't prepared for his newest Robin's neuroses.

This has Tim & Cassie meeting at an archaeologist event as kids and having to fight a monster thing :) it's cute

GODDD this fic? This fic ruined me. Beautiful Tim characterization, a gorgeous look at Bruce and how much he fucks up despite caring, and Dick being a stressed but amazing big brother with gorgeous writing. I love their brotherly affections here, and Tim's weird neuroses being shown here. Tim & Bruce is how it starts, and it's very much centered around their relationship, but it tapers off into Dick & Tim, which I'm not complaining about. Kon (and Bart!) makes a cameo and is an amazing friend. Can't rec this enough. If you read none of the other fics, please read this one.

This is Dick and Tim again. Dick forces Tim to go undercover with him to an Elvis convention in a thinly veiled attempt to spend time with the brother who he doesn't think knows how much he loves him. It's set in Tim's POV, though, so until Dick says this, Tim doesn't know. Hilarious and short.

This is Dick and Tim (who's surprised? Nobody) where Dick goes to Robin!Tim's science fair because Tim mentioned it and well, nobody else was going. Short and sweet.

This deals with the batfam finding out about the shitshow that was Tim's BruceQuest. If you're a stickler for canon I'd recommend you skip this one, but if not, it's a great read.

This is Dick and Tim again, and it's amazing. Tim's alone on Christmas Eve. Dick finds out, and does something about it. It's Robin!Tim, so this is Dick, Babs and Tim. This author is amazing at writing their interactions, plus inside Dick's head is a tricky place to write and they nail it perfectly. Mostly Dick & Tim, but since he invites Tim to Babs' holiday party, Babs makes a good number of cameos.

This is Tim talking a jumper off the ledge while Damian watches. Then they talk about it. Tim from Damian's POV is always interesting, but this especially is amazing.

This is a core four fic, Tim's POV! Pure humor. Tim finds a dildo in the dishwasher and he drags them for a team meeting so he can sus out whose it is.

I've recced this before, I think, but I'll do it again. Red Robin canon divergence fic in which Bruce is actually dead, and Tim calls Dick to tell him he thinks he may have been wrong. Dick's POV, short, but the emotion in this is outstanding.

In this fic, Damian has trouble with the transition from Dick's Batman to Bruce's Batman. Tim, who's also had both, is surprisingly helpful. This has so many Tim and Damian feels that I'm literally bursting at the seams. Melancholy, camaraderie, and all the good stuff. Damian's POV, and since he sucks at so much as guessing at what's going on in Tim's head, it's all the more great.

This is Dick and Tim, a soft Christmastime fic.

This is Bruce and Tim. Bruce and Tim have a sort-of game that started when Tim was thirteen. Initially, it was Tim stealing sips (or occasionally whole mugs) of Bruce’s coffee, back when he was too young for Alfred to allow him to drink it. Now, though, Bruce is getting his own back, and steals Tim’s coffee when he can. Sweet and fluffy.

Here, Tim gets a headwound and only remembers back to his Robin days, and forgets to be awkward around Dick and Damian. Tugs at the heartstrings. Dick's reminded of how much he misses this Tim.

This is really funny. Remember that time during the YJ days where the adult heroes were de-aged and the kid ones grew to be adults? Tim didn't reach six foot. In this, he's mocked ruthlessly for it.

Here, Tim goes to high school again after dropping out :) it's core four and hilarious

In this, Tim accidentally kills his dad in self defense—or rather, thinks he does, Jack's still alive but he doesn't know that until Dick shows up—and scrambles to call Dick. He calls Jason instead. Dick eventually gets called and shows up, and the brotherly feels in this are amazing. Tim's in shock for a good portion of it, and it's his POV, so you've got to piece some stuff together. Bad dad Jack, as in worse than canon bad dad Jack. Tugs on the heartstrings, and have I said I love Dick in this? Because I do. Bruce shows up near the end, and to everyone's surprise, doesn't absolutely fuck things up and/or fail as a parent.

Here, Tim is sick and alone. Dick, after not hearing from Tim at all for three days, goes to his apartment, finds him sick, and takes care of him. Eventually he gets dragged to the Manor for some actual r&r. It's sweet, and this writer has an amazing way with words and an intriguing flow.

In this, Bruce knows Tim. They have a routine, have habits, they know each other. This is so so touching, and I love it so much.

Here, Tim and Steph give Bruce a headache. It's amazing.

I..can't even begin to describe this. Bruce is fresh from the timeline, and this is a sort of introspection/character study type thing about him and Tim and how Tim's changed. Mostly, though? Mostly, Bruce just gives his son a hug.

Here, Kon is Tim's work husband. Bruce suffers. Pure fluff and humor, with a touch of feels.

Here, Bruce takes Tim to get his wisdom teeth out. They're both worried, but together, they're alright. Tim cries while doped up on the drugs. He cries a lot.

Here, 90's!Tim Drake wakes up in his Red Robin body. Exhausted from a YJ mission, he chooses to focus on getting through a normal day so as not to disrupt things for his future self. But, y'know, his way. Hilarious and so in-character, if exaggerated for comedy.

This is Tim and Damian—Damian gets hit with truth serum on patrol, and a pissed off Tim has to come and get him. Damian resolves to not tell Tim he's been hit with truth serum. They get closer as a result. Love their dynamic in this.

This is core four again, but just general teenager superhero chaos. Can't rec it enough

Here, Tim tries to build a LEGO Gotham, but his family just can't leave it—or him—alone. He calls a family meeting to tell them to knock it off, and they do not. Fluff and humor.

Here, Tim has appendicitis and gets his appendix removed. The best mix of fluff, feels, and good old complicated family dynamics ever

In this, Bruce tries to navigate giving affection to his odd son, Tim. Touching and funny.

This is Tim and Damian—Damian crashes on Tim's bed in the Watchtower when injured, Tim finds him. They talk, and maybe bond a bit, even though they'd never admit it.

Here, Bruce hugs Tim. Really nothing else to it.

Another fic where Tim wakes up with amnesia and pretends to know his family so he's not rude. He's found out when he correctly deduces Bruce is his dad, but makes the mistake of calling Bruce dad.

This is Dick and Tim again. Tim gets de-aged into a six-month-old, and Dick takes care of him. Soft and so so sweet.

In this, Tim's trying to work in his apartment when his siblings keep showing up to distract him and get him to take a break. It's sweet of them, if very annoying.

This is Bruce and Tim. Tim's injured and lying in bed, Bruce gets him takeout. Feels fuzzy and just...good. You've got to read it to know what I'm talking about, no summary does it justice.

Here, Damian tries to make amends with Tim. He does it very oddly though, so Tim thinks he has a crush on him, and avoids him all the more for it because ew-gross-ew-ew.

In this, Tim gets his teeth knocked out and grabs Dick as a mediator so he tells Bruce. Short and funny-sweet. You can tell this is in Tim's Robin run, due to all the little hints dropped.

This is Tim and Kon, funny and nonsensical. Tim calls Kon in the early hours of the morning, drunk. Kon thinks he deserves sainthood for this.

In this, Tim has road rage and most of his family find that out in the most hilarious way possible.

Bruce and Tim—a test sort of fic? Interesting, definitely.

This is timkon, Tim has memory loss and is amazed by Kon all over again.

Core four go to a gala :)

This is Dick and Tim, Tim breaks into Dick's house, accidentally interrupts his nap, tries to leave out of guilt, and gets wrangled into hugs. So so soft and so so sweet.

Another de-aged Tim fic, but this time with six year old Tim and Bruce taking care of him. This is so melancholy and...ugh. I love them.

Here, Tim and Dick are thrown into an alternate universe and have to try and get back with no other support system and no way out. They meet this world's version of Bruce and Alfred, though.

CEO Tim, and hates it. He makes that Luthor's problem.

Timkon, in which Tim plans all his dates VIA corkboard and Kon is so attracted to that.

CEO Tim (again), except he's still a teenager and people end up thinking he's a communist. This is short and hilarious all the way through. Also, Bruce is there.

This is The kid!Tim fic ever. Tim, having found a weird hole after a storm, decides to go exploring ignoring the fact that This Is Gotham and They Probably Have Cursed Stuff Down There.Luckily, it was just a cave system that spans the entire Gotham underground. Unluckily, Tim is a very curious child. Tim's a sorta eldritch being at the end?? Amazing, 100 would recommend.

In this, Tim finds out he isn't his parents' biological son. This changes everything. This changes nothing. Can't say anything else without spoiling, but I can't rec it enough.

In this fic, Bruce is back in time in Drake Manor, and meets baby Tim. It's like you're frozen in time, and all that matters is Bruce and his infant not-yet-son.

Here, Kon and Tim date. Tim's a cryptid stalker that refuses to be photographed, Dick is a big brother that loves his little brother, and it's cute.

Sorry it took me so long to compile this list anon, happy reading!

[the-fat-raccoon]

🌌 astro-gnomey Follow

Some of you don't want to hear it but at some point we're going to HAVE to acknowledge the effects of storm sorcerers (and keiromancy as a whole) on the environment. The wizard council has been pushing for regulations on these practices for years due to its large ecological effect on the realm, and yet it still stays unregulated because of misinformed petitioners who insist on preserve this harmful practice.

x x x

🌬 420haz3it Follow

hey ops ex here. they literally went through my family's tome of spells and destroyed every page that contained keiromancy. spells that were in my family since the Wizardry Renaissance, that saved towns from floods and droughts alike, are now lost to time and space

also as people in the notes pointed out all of those links are blatant misinformation that ignores what storm sorcerers have done to protect not only their local communities but the environment as a whole for centuries, and the people who spread this information are the exact same people who advocated to repeal the wishing star protection act.

hating keiromancy has always been a distraction so astrological mages can push for more unsafe practices in their own field. don't let them lie about their intent, and don't let the wizard council rush the process to earn an astromage liscense.

🪄 tradmage12 Follow

Being from a family of storm sorcerers puts a direct line from you to the Great Calamity that wiped out our magic for a millenia. You deserve to lose that tome and every last spark of magic in you.

🌬 420haz3it Follow

what

🌬 420haz3it Follow

theres no way youre serious. you dont actually believe that.

🪄 tradmage12 Follow

We all know it, the Great Calamity would have never happened if the sorcerer faction had listened to the wizard councils orders and steered clear of dragon hunting. But they didn't listen, and everyone suffered because of it. Don't act like there's no reason to not trust your kind with their own practices. You just can't help yourselves.

🌌 astro-gnomey Follow

I leave for the Berry Harvest and come back to this mess, really funny how you'll mention me taking action against your family's evil dark spells but don't mention that you only dated me for your weird gnomeplay fantasies. Also pay attention to the language used, very Anti Mage rhetoric being spread. What else would you expect of a storm sorcerer, of course they want to keep their powers, I'm going to shut off reblogs if people in the notes cant see how they're being manipulated by keiromancers. Quit trying to be 'progressive' when you just want to keep ruining the course of nature and keep down the mage class.

🌬 420haz3it Follow

get me off this fucking lichsite. there is no 'anti mage rhetoric', that's not a fucking thing. mages aren't some repressed class no matter how much you want to pretend that, they haven't had to deal with magical restrictions since before the great calamity even happened, meanwhile sorcerers to this day are still fighting to be seen as magical equals.

and while im at it 'keiromancers' is a made up term to put all weather magic users under one umbrella, as if forms of keiromancy arent so diverse amongst the realms that you cant even begin to compare them. it is not the same as saying necromancers. dont even start that bs.

also, gnomeplay is perfectly normal and acceptable between consenting partners, which we were, so idek why you bring that up. if i as a half elf want to have gnome partners theres literally no issue with that, youre mad because gneillielle has a more bountiful gourd harvest and far more whimsical tunes than you ever brought to our relationship.

storm sorcerers have done nothing wrong, you're the problem.

perhaps some shadow work could unlodge the staff youve got stuck up your cap and you could see the filthy fuckign system youre supporting as an astromage, im sick and tired of this.

🎱 claire-vances-fourth-eye Follow

op starts posting untagged wizard council x reader failed abjuration content in a year btw

5,482 notes

[monsamborabutterfly]

Love sea EP 8 thoughts a little later than usual cause life happens:

- Mutrak are adorable little fucks and they've got me wrapped around their fingers like no other

- Mutrak being kinky bless

- Mut and vie being friends I'm high-key here for it

- rak and vie being traumatized disaster queers together since they were kids I love that for them

- Mut and meena a match made in heaven. Cuties🥺

-Vie and Mook kissing and boom I'm sold on their chemistry

-i love vie sorry not sorry

- Mutrak in their gentle kissing era, I can't deal. I felt that scene in my bones

-hate the dad. He's an abuser just for fun. The actor though 10/10 (all these middle aged Thai actors really do make the best out of being solely cast as mum/dad...no like seriously I'm 99% convinced that all production companies in Thailand have like one giant folder with all actors over 40 that's just labeled "parents" and they rotate the actors every few series😂)

- why were fortpeat literally made for each other?? I am a strict supporter of bl pairings not getting stuck with each other but damn I'd happily watch fortpeat together until they're old and grey playing queer grandpa's

- god damn I just love a good family drama moment. Give me the Angst. All the angst. SO MUCH ANGST I'M LIVING

- I firmly believe that Rak ripped the contract cause he wants to be with Mut for real so I'm honestly not super worried.

In conclusion: 1000/10 ep for me. Scratched my brain in all the right ways

[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

Murder Sibling Tuu

🐱

So concept

Yuu is the eldest and comes from a HUGE family with lots of siblings that are part of criminal legacy. Literally all of them are some sort of mafia boss, assassin, drug lord, or bank robber except for Yuu.

This isn't because Yuu hates it, nope its just not their thing. Their little siblings always go to Yuu for ideas on their next murder/heist/ect and they always give the best advice ever despite not being a criminal.

When they get isekaied, they didn't know that their family also came with until its too late.

Let's say they're dating Floyd since that was the original context. Under cut cause length

It's Vargas camp and as things come to a close there's another attack, the masked person overpowers Vargas and locks onto a group.of Yuus friends, chasing the first Years, Riddle, Malleus, Jade and Floyd.

The others scatter, just to get stuck in (non lethal) traps to be picked off later. The killer is smart and though Malleus is powerful he is outwitted when he caught in magic resistant trap— this damn killer was PLANNING it.

Floyd and the group fight back. But they are all beat up pretty bad, thankfully, there is no stab marks as the psychopath seems to be dragging this out for their enjoyment.

As they kick Floyd onto the ground as they spill the first drop of blood of the night as the killer slashes them and leaves a "superficial", but concerning wound on Floyds abdomen.

Jade screams out at his brother in horror, show more emotion than he ever has in this damn life, despite where he's trapped, he risks blot and shoots out a simple spell at the killers head just for them to dodge.

"You want to see my face that badly?" The voice was filled with a sickeningly honeyed tone of amusement. "I guess that's fair since I intend to kill you... may as well let you see who killed you."

"You wont get away with this!" Sebek shrieks. The killer takes off the mask just to see... Yuu?

"Yuu? No...nonono not my shrimpy... why?! Why would you—"

"Wait wait wait. Did you say Yuu? How the fuck do you know that name?" The killer asks but something was off, this wasn't yuus voice.

Just then Yuu comes out and slide in front of Floyd protectively, ready to fight before freezing.

"TUU?!"

"Yuu?! Oh God, oh shit. Don't tell me these are your friends..."

"You stabbed my fucking boyfriend!"

"Fuck! Sorry I didn't know— oh geez...." Tuu facepalms. "Hold on, I actually have a few healing potions..."

"Um... can you explain???" Riddle wheeze.

"Everyone this one of my my Octuplets, Tuu."

"OCTUPLET??" Sebek shrieks.

"Yeah that's not even all my siblings either, don't ask I lost count"

"Damn I'm sorry about that everyone, I would have never attacked if I knew Yuu was here. But dammit, I had it all planned out and everything! I would kill off some of you and leave your bodies out so that others would warn of this place and bam! A buncha idiots would explore and I get to practice my assassinations and murder techniques! Can't believe I wasted all that time though now....".

"Wait, Yuu why aren't you surprised?" Ace gawks

"Oh big sibling Yuu over here is weird. Literally everyone in our family's a murderer EXCEPT yuu which is suprising since they always have the best ideas for maiming!" Tuu giggles

"Wait... if your here does that mean—" a new voice interrupts Yuu

"Sort of! I assume our entire family is out in this new world but we haven't all been able to find each other. Thankfully, me and Tuu happened to be summoned together!"

"Who the fuck is that?!" Jack barks

"That's Kyu." Kyu stands proudly in their formal attire that's decades old as they twirl a cigar.

"Why didn't you reach out to me? I know Tuu is to busy murdering things but I know for a fact you knew where I was. Im the oldest! You report to me!" yuu scolds

"You're older by 10 minutes." Tuu interrupts as they pour the potion on Floyd.

"Shut up!"

Kyu shrugs. "I'm building a criminal empire."

"What" Deuce blinks.

"I said im building a criminal empire. I was the leader of several mafias and other organized gangs back in my world and now its back to square one! I need my underlings I'm not just gonna light my own cigars now, cmon!"

"That sounds like Kyu alright..." Yuu sighs.

"Plus then I'll be able to magically enroll our whole family into NRC just with a little blackmail as we learn about this world!"

"Crowleys pathetic you don't need a criminal empire you just need 5 dollars" Epel sighs.

"Perhaps." Kyuu shrugs again and takes a puff. "But having an interdimensional drug empire once we find away home is an opportunity I must not let pass by. Speaking of which, give me your phone, Yuu."

Yuu hands over the phone to Kyu. "Now you should be able to contact us and I'll keep you updated once I find the whole family. Oh yeah, be sure to send pictures of all your friends to the group chat along with their full names so we know who not to kill, maim, target—"

"I get it." Yuu sighs before helping Floyd up. "I love you guys but damn!"

"You love th—" Ace covers Deuces mouth.

"Sorry Floydie!" Tuu chuckles cuteley. "I hope this doesn't make things awkward between us! Oh just forget about this encounter! I can't wait to meet you when Yuu brings you home for dinner!" Tuu waves

"Eat shit." Floyd huffs. "Awe you're adorable, just take good care of Yuu! If you break their heart ill slaughter you like the damn animal you are!~" tuu practially sings

"Yuu can do that on their own." "But they won't that's the issue"

Tuu sighs again. "Now im gonna have to release everyone from their traps now ueueueu... there were so many boys with such wearable skin! I already had the suit planned out for when I got them!" Tuu mopes.

"Right just tell our parents—" "bosses" "tell our bosses i love them and to please take it easy with all the murder please."

"No promises Yuuie!~ bye bye!~" Tuu cackles and they run off into the woods and Ryu dissapears

The rest of the night is Yuu profusely apologizing and having to skirt around questions for legal reasons

And also

"Why are all of you named Yuu or something similar"

"My bosses named the second oldest Tuu. Do you really think they're good with names?"

[dreamofbecoming]

yeah alright this got away from me. posting in pieces, part one is just stobin, no shippy stuff. steddie and rockie to follow. i'll drop it on ao3 once all 3 parts are done

now on ao3!

platonic stobin

rating: t

wc: 3.5k

---

Robin stopped being surprised by Steve Harrington showing up at her bedroom window months ago. Jesus, there's a sentence her 16 year old self wouldn't fucking believe for a second. The Hair, climbing up the trellis her dad built for the roses her mom planted and then forgot about three months later? Yeah right, as if. But it turns out alternate dimensions and sci-fi movie monsters and Russian conspiracies in Bumfuck, Nowhere, USA are all real, so how surprising really is The King himself, collapsing through her window with all the grace of a baby giraffe, out of breath like he- holy shit, did he fucking run here?

"Dingus, did you run here? What the hell?"

"Had to- hang on, Jesus. Holy shit." He bends over, hands on his knees, panting like he just ran a marathon. Which, she guesses, he almost did.

"You have a car, you lunatic, what could possibly be so important?"

"Didn't think about it. Had to get here."

"Is someone dead?!" Oh fuck, Is the Upside Down back? Oh shit, oh no, it can't be back, right? Superhero girl closed the gates! Right?! Oh god, oh no, oh fuck, it's back, the Russians are back, they realized they couldn't let her live after what she's seen, her parents will never even know what happened to her, and they'll kill Dingus too, and dorky little Henderson, and that menace Erica, oh god, they're gonna die, and Hopper's gone and superhero girl is far away and she doesn't have superpowers anymore anyway, which is frankly bogus because what the hell, Robin never even got to hang out with a real live magic person before, which, ok, that's a selfish thought, but that's ok, we can think selfish thoughts and then set them aside and not act on them, thoughts are not actions, thoughts happen all the time without our consent, they don't determine our character-

"Bobs, you're spiraling. Nothing bad happened, I just realized something and I freaked out and I had to talk to you right away. Forgot to call. Sorry, I should have called. Ran straight out of the house. I don't even think my shoes match, what the fuck?"

She's gonna kill him, she really is.

She loves him so much.

"Jesus, you're insane. Sit, you absolute dweeb. I'm getting you some water, when I get back you can tell me what the hell is going on."

He's sitting on her bed when she gets back upstairs, staring at something in his hands. Christ, his hands are shaking. What the fuck, Dingus?

He takes the water and downs it in one go- ugh, sports guys- then flops onto his back and covers his eyes with a miserable groan.

"I know we've got the whole twin telepathy thing going on, bubba, but I'm gonna need at least a little bit to work with here. Give me something. Is it your parents? The kids? Uh, what was her name? From Thursday? Janice?"

"Janine, and no. Ugh. Here." The arm not covering his eyes flops out towards her, holding- ah. A zine. He had promised to drive up to Indy last weekend to the secret bookshop she told him about and get her some new ones, even though she couldn't go with him because her cousin Randy got caught cheating on his fiancée and her parents made her come with the rest of the family to help him move. Fucking Randy. Maybe he should make better choices, so the rest of them wouldn't have to clean up his messes. Jerk.

Anyway.

"Marked the page." Which, yep, there's a purple paper clip stuck to a page near the middle, because Steve knows how much she hates people who dogear books, even books that aren't really books at all, so he's been training himself out of it, because he's sort of the best. Again, 16 year old Robin would have her committed for thinking that, but here we are.

The pamphlet isn't one of the periodicals she sent him for, so he must have picked it up on his own. It looks handmade, just some folded sheets that look like they came out of a typewriter, bound with the kind of twine you can buy at the hardware store. It's called Awakenings. The page he's marked looks like a personal essay, no title, no real signature, just a pair of initials at the end of the page and a half of writing. She starts reading, trying to figure out what the hell spooked Steve so bad.

"I've always been normal. I've always had crushes on men, just like the other girls. There was never a feeling of "I'm different," or "Oh, this is wrong." There was never anything to think very hard about. I'd giggle and blush when the boys looked over at us on the playground, same as everyone else. Later on when I was older I looked at my poster of Harrison Ford, shirtless and hairy and sweating, and I touched myself, and it felt good, just like it was supposed to. I didn't mind thinking of my future husband, and our future kids, and the pretty house with the pretty garden we'd have, just like my parents have, just like they wanted for me. I was normal. Everything was fine.

I thought everything about me was normal. So I didn't understand why the other girls at sleepover parties would giggle and stop and say "Ew, gross!" when we practiced kissing. It felt nice! I wanted to keep going! But it seemed like no one else did. I didn't understand why none of them talked about getting butterflies in their stomach when Laura, who was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen, transferred in our senior year, why they seemed so angry at her. Those butterflies were what jealousy felt like, right? So why did the other girls seem to feel so different?

I made my first lesbian friend in college, on the very first day, right across the hall in my dorm. We sat next to each other at Orientation and I thought I'd never have another best friend that wonderful in my whole life, so I'd hold on to her with everything I had. She came out to me the night before Christmas break, hiding under the blankets in my dorm room with the twinkling lights glowing. She was so scared. I held her and told her I loved her no matter what, and she seemed so glad, to have someone to talk to.

When she talked about falling in love with girls, I was so confused. The way she described it sounded like what it felt like to have girlfriends, I was sure. I felt that all the time. I asked her if she was sure she was gay, and she looked so shocked and angry and hurt, and I didn't know how to fix it, so I tried to explain. That what she felt couldn't be liking girls, because I felt that too, and I was normal. I liked boys, so I couldn't be gay. I couldn't be.

I'm glad it was her I said all that to. If someone else had told me about being bisexual, I think I would have hated them. I would have cried, and screamed, and said horrible things. Because I wasn't gay, I was normal, and it was so scary to think that might be a lie. Thank God it was her, my best friend in the world, who I never want to lose. Thank God I listened.

Because I'm not normal. I'm queer. I like men, and I like women. I can love them both the same, but it doesn't matter anymore, because I love her. I love her, and she loves me, and I don't need to be normal anymore."

Robin's face feels wet, which probably means she's crying. She cries a lot, reading these sorts of stories, in the zines she has to keep hidden under her bed, or, these days, at Steve's house. It's never going to be her, she knows. Not here in Hawkins, but it still makes something ache deep inside her, like pressing on a bruise, but in a good way, seeing love happen to other people. People like her. Seeing that it can.

"So?"

Oh shit. Right, Dingus. They're about him right now. Something about this essay in particular freaked him out.

"Uh. It's. A nice essay? I'm glad things worked out for them?"

Stevie lets out a pathetic whine, sort of like back at Scoops when he earned a particularly bad tally on the You Suck board. "Robbiiiiiiieeeee!"

"I'm sorry! I think I'm missing something, what's wrong with this essay? I don't get it, bubba, I'm sorry. I need some context." She does feel bad. Usually she can pluck whatever's bothering him right out of his brain and into the light, where it almost never looks as bad, but she's at a loss right now.

He's got both hands over his face again, and his response is so muffled she can't make out a word.

"Try again in human sounds, please."

"Ugh! I thought everyone felt like that!"

Huh? "Felt like...what, exactly?"

"Like that!" He flails wildly at the pamphlet in her hands. He's sitting up now, hair all askew from tugging at it, and there's a vaguely worrying crazed look in his eye, like right before he tackled that guard. "Like kissing boys and girls both feel nice, and like seeing a handsome guy and feeling jealous of him makes my stomach flutter, and like having friends feels the same as having crushes! I thought that was just how everyone felt all the time!"

Oh.

Oh.

Oh no.

Poor Dingus! No wonder he panicked and ran here like a crazy person!

"Stevie, can I hug you? Please?" She's not much for physical touch most of the time, but Steve is, and also she's found in the last few months that she doesn't mind so much when it's him. She sort of understands why other people like hugs so much, if they always feel like hugging Steve feels for her. And she really thinks he needs to be hugged, right now.

He nods miserably. She drapes her arms around his shoulders and holds on as tight as she can, hauling him sideways until he's practically laying down on her. He clutches her back and buries his face in her shoulder. She can feel her neck getting wet with tears, a sensation that would normally make her want to claw off her own skin, but this isn't about her. Dingus needs her.

"It's ok, bubba. I'm so sorry. I know how scary this is. When I first figured out I had a crush on Linda Sanderson I cried so hard I threw up, you know? I get it. It's gonna be ok, I promise. We'll make it ok. We faced down evil Russians and giant meat monsters, what's a little sexuality crisis, huh? We got this! We're the goddamn Wonder Twins!"

He snorts at that, which she's pretty sure leaves snot on her neck, which. Ew. Still. Problems for Later Robin.

"We are not, Will and El are the Wonder Twins."

"Uh, nope, no chance, I barely even met them so therefore I am vetoing their application. Sorry kiddos, better luck next time! Find your own nickname, losers!"

Steve sits back, laughing, and she preens a little at being able to bring him back from the brink so easily. She loves him so much she feels like she's glowing with it, sometimes. It almost makes her wish she was straight, because what girl is she ever going to find who loves her this much? But only almost, because. Well. Girls, amiright? Phew.

"So what now, Stevie? You wanna say it out loud? That helps, sometimes. You wanna not say it out loud? You wanna go to a gay bar and find you a boy? You wanna never think about it again? It's totally your call."

"Say it out loud, huh?"

"Hm. It took me like a month, and then the first time I could only say it sitting in the back of my closet with the bedroom door locked and the closet door closed, and I could only whisper it. Just "I'm a lesbian," to myself, like the world's most ironic little goblin. And I had to throw up again after. But it did feel good, once I rinsed my mouth out, anyway. Cleansing, you know? And it gets easier every time." Steve's eyebrows are raised and he's chuckling again, so that's a win. She's not lying, but it is sort of funny, she supposes. In hindsight, anyway.

"Ok. Ok, I can do that. I think. Yeah, I can do that."

She's so proud of him. He's the bravest person she's ever met, she thinks. "You wanna get in the closet?"

"Isn't the whole point to come out of the closet, Robs?" He's smirking at her. Bastard. She whacks him in the shoulder on principle. He may be having a crisis, but he's still a jackass. Her favorite jackass in the whole world, but still.

"Har har, you're a regular Bob Hope. Alright then, bigshot, let's hear it."

A little of that fear creeps back onto his face, and she wishes she could wipe it off, but that's not how this works. They can't make the scary things less scary. He couldn't make the Russians less terrifying, but he could hold her hand and make her laugh and carry some of that fear with her. She can do that for him now, too.

She grabs his hand, and he clutches back tightly. He takes a deep breath.

"I'm...fuck. Ok. Ok, I can do this. I'm...bisexual." The air leaves him in a big whoosh, and he laughs a little. "Yeah, ok, fuck. I'm bisexual. Holy shit, Robbie, I'm bisexual!"

"Hell yeah you are!" She's grinning so hard her cheeks hurt. She's so fucking proud of him.

He's laughing again, a little hysterically, and he hugs her tight again, and she holds him back just as close and thinks oh, he's like me. I'm not alone. I have Steve, and he's like me, and he's mine forever and ever.

When they separate, she looks at him seriously.

"So do you, like, want this to be a thing? Because we can totally make it a thing, and like, get me a fake ID and go to a gay bar and do all kinds of wild shit if you want, but we don't have to, you know? If you need to just, like. Digest this, for a while. It's totally up to you, I just know it took me a while to feel ok with it, and I have no idea if it's different for you but I just want to be what you need, you know? You've been so good with me, and I've never had a queer friend before, so I don't know how, but I want to be just as good to you. You're my Dingus and I love you and I don't know how much of a gay guru I can be on account of, you know, I've never met any gay people besides me and the pretty lady at the bookstore but I couldn't even get real human words to come out of my mouth when I tried to talk to her so I don't think that counts, you know? But I still wanna help! Let me help!"

"Bobbie! Bobbie breathe, you're gonna pass out. I don't think I need a gay guru, I just need a gay best friend, and I have that, so I promise I'm good, ok? Promise. Also I love you too.”

She takes a deep breath, following his lead the way they worked out in the horrible days after Starcourt, when she couldn't sleep without him next to her, warm and alive and breathing, and even then she would wake up in the night with her breath coming short and her vision tunneling and Steve would hold her hand against his chest and breathe slowly, in and out, until she could follow him, and the world wasn't so terrible and scary and loud anymore.

She still thinks about that awful hour underground, thinking she was strapped to the corpse of a boy she never let become her friend, but Steve is always there now when she needs him, and he never complains when she grabs his wrist or puts her head on his chest to make absolutely sure that big, stupid heart is still beating.

When she's breathing normally again, he drops their joined hands down between them, toying idly with the chain linking her ring to her bracelet. "I think...I think I'm glad I said it, and I'm glad we talked about it, but can we maybe just...put it away, for a while? Like it's not...ugh. I guess this is kind of shitty to say, so like, hit me if you want, I guess, but I kind of don't think it matters right now?"

"No no, that makes perfect sense! Like, you still like girls, right?" He nods. "And you don't like. Have a crush on any boys right now. Or do you? Oh man if you do you have to tell me though, it's platonic soulmate law. It's in the bylaws, Steve, don't make me soulmate fine you!"

He laughs and shoves her face away. "Jesus, Rob, no! I don't have a crush on any guys, who would I even crush on in this town? We're not exactly swimming in eligible bachelors. I don't have a crush on anybody at all, I'd tell you, I swear. I know the rules!"

"Oh phew, good. You have to tell me when you do, though, I'm way excited to get you back for making fun of Tammy."

"It was the God's honest truth, Bobbie! She sings like a muppet!"

"Oh my god, shut up, Dingus! Ugh! As I was saying, you super duper have to tell me when you do, but for now, I think maybe you don't have to think about it really at all if you don't want. I mean, practically speaking, it's not really relevant to your everyday life, so we can totally revisit when that changes, but you don't have to like. Join a pride parade tomorrow, you know? You are you who are no matter what. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, especially not to me, not ever."

He leans his head on her shoulder, and she scritches her nails through his hair. It really has no right being as soft as it is, with the amount of hairspray he uses. It's frankly rude, is what it is.

"Thanks, Bobs. I think I'm just gonna put it away for now. It just...another thing to know about me, you know? Like, I'm bad at fighting people but good at fighting monsters, all my best friends are kids except you, I'm bi but it doesn't matter because there aren't any boys to date in Hawkins anyway. Plus my dad would kill me if he found out. Like actually kill me, not "oh geez I missed curfew, my dad's gonna kill me" type kill me, like I think he'd actually try and beat me to death. So there's really no reason to talk about it right now, you know?"

There's a pit of ice in her stomach, and she tightens her arm around him like she can keep him safe just by holding on tight enough. She hates how casually he said that, just like she hates how casually he always talks about how his parents treat him, like he honestly believes it's normal. "Jesus, Dingus. You know you can come here if you need, right? My parents love you, they already think we're getting married. They'd make you sleep in the guest room, but I could sneak you in here easy."

He snorts again. "We're totally gonna end up married for tax reasons anyway, we're never beating the rumors." That makes her snort, too. He's not wrong, though. She isn't going to be allowed to have a wife anytime soon, and if she has to choose someone to be her next of kin, it's always gonna be him. They're planning to move in together when she goes to school next year anyway. No one is ever gonna believe them that they aren't dating, but that's...fine. Honestly, there are worse things. Better to have Steve by her side than not, and if no one else understands them, well, they understand each other, don't they? That's more than enough.

"Yeah, I know I can come here if I need, Robs. It's fine mostly, I swear. They're not home until Christmas anyway."

He takes another deep breath, like he's settling himself. "I'm just glad we talked about it. I feel better now."

She cards her fingers through his hair again, basking in the feeling of her favorite person so close, and so content. "I'm glad, Dingus."

They're alive, and they're together, and they're queer, and neither of them is ever going to have to be alone again.

"Hang on, did you say you've kissed girls and boys?!"

part 2 part 3

[allthingsfangirl101]

Rarely Stunned – Gator Tillman

Gator's POV

I've known Y/N all my life. To be fair, just because I knew her doesn't mean I was friends with her. We were in the same class all through school, but I've never had a real conversation with her.

Y/N was known in town as having the most beautiful voice. She sang in the school choir and the church choir. They begged her to do a solo when she was only 13. After that, the whole town fell in love with her. Every family wanted their son to marry her and every boy our age wanted to be with her. I was the only one that people thought wasn't into her, but that was a gigantic load of bullshit.

Of course, I was into her. She was the only one in school who didn't treat me weirdly because of my dad. She was sweet to me. She once told me that she didn't want me to become like my father. She believed I could be better.

I sat in my dad's car in the grocery store parking lot, waiting for him to hurry up and buy the beer. I sucked on my vape, blowing the air out the window. He hated it when I made the car smell like my vape.

My breath got stuck in my throat causing me to chock in the smoke in my mouth when I saw Y/N walking out of the store. I couldn't help but follow her with my eyes as she went to her car. She opened the trunk and started putting bags in. Suddenly, a bag broke making her sigh. Her frustration made me jump out of the truck. I jogged over and started helping her pick up the items that fell.

"Thanks, Gator," she sighed. "But I can pick this up."

"I don't mind," I shrugged. "I'm trying to be a gentleman."

I looked up and smiled when she laughed. "Gator Tillman, a gentleman," she chuckled. "That's not something you here often."

"I'm not all bad," I mumbled. I looked up, my breath getting caught in my throat when I saw the way she looked at me.

"I know that," she said gently. We had an intense staring contest until my dad interrupted it.

"Hey! Gator, get your ass in the truck!"

"Sorry," I mumbled. I cleared my throat before looking up at her. "It was good to see you, Y/N."

"You too," she blushed. "Thanks for the help, Gator."

When I got in the car, I turned to see my dad smirking at me. "What?" I sighed.

"Are you trying to steal Y/N away from that prick, Donny?" My dad laughed.

"What?" I scoffed. "One of her bags broke. I was just helping her pick up her groceries. I wasn't trying. . . Wait, she's dating Donny? The fucking water boy?!"

"Not for long," my dad said in a sing-songy voice. "Got get her, tiger."

* * * * *

The rest of the night, I couldn't stop thinking about Y/N being with that dweepe Donny. He wasn't good enough to play on the football team but the coach was secretly sleeping with his mom so he made him the waterboy. Y/N didn't deserve that nerd. She deserved someone who could take care of her. It made me so angry I got drunk.

I woke up to an immediate hangover. I sat up and slowly got ready for my shift. I went about the day like it was any other. Responding to random calls and vaping in between. That was until I got a certain call.

"We got a 417 in progress," dispatch said.

"Got it," I answered. "Where?"

They listed off the address, but something felt strangely familiar. I ignored it and drove to the address. When we went to the door, it was opened.

"That can't be good," I mumbled. We went in, guns ready. We went in different directions and swept the place, but it was empty.

Until I walked into the living room.

My stomach lurched when I saw her. Y/N was on the floor of the living room, passed out next to a destroyed coffee table. I felt like everything froze as I watched the puddle of blood slowly grow. I lowered my gun, unable to move.

"Sir, there's no one here." My partner's voice dropped when he saw her. "Except her," he said slowly.

I finally snapped out of it. I put my gun back in my holster and ran to her. I collapsed next to her, not entirely sure what to do.

"Get a medic!" I yelled. "Now!"

I turned back to Y/N, my eyes scanning her body. I carefully reached forward and moved some hair out of her face. The second I touched her, I felt how cold she was.

"Where the hell is that medic?!"

My breath got caught in my throat when I heard her groan. "Y/N?" I dropped my voice. "It's me. It's Gator. Open your eyes for me, Y/N. Please."

When she still didn't do or say anything, I continued, "You're safe. I swear, Y/N, I will find whoever did this to you and I will keep you safe. I promise. Just, please, wake up."

I held my breath as I waited. Finally, Y/N's eyes weakly and slowly fluttered open.

"Gator?" She said my name so weakly it broke my heart.

"I'm here," I said quickly. "I'm right here."

"Gator," she repeated my name.

"Medics are on the way, Y/N. They're close. Just hang on a little longer. Please."

Y/N reached for me and I instantly grabbed her hand. "Don't leave me," she said weakly.

"I'm not going anywhere."

* * * * *

I sat in the waiting room, nervously bouncing my leg. I kept glancing towards the door, wishing a nurse would walk through it with news on Y/N. I was ready to storm over to the nurses' station, flash my badge, and demand for them to tell me what was going on with Y/N. The second someone came out, I approached them.

"How is she?"

"She's awake," the nurse said kindly. "Follow me."

I was right at her heels as she walked down the hall. When she got to the door, she stepped aside.

"Go on in," she said. She smiled before lowering her voice and adding, "All she has asked for is you."

My heart jumped into my throat as she winked at me and walked back to the nurses' station. I took a shaky breath as I gathered my courage to open the door. I slowly put my hand on the handle and walked in. My breath got caught in my throat when I saw her asleep on the bed.

Y/N was covered in bruises and dried blood. She had an oxygen tube, the one that went into her nose, and an IV in her arm. Watching her sleep, my anger built. I didn't know who did this, but I knew what I would do when I found them.

Seeing that she was sleeping, I started to leave her room.

"Gator?"

I froze when she weakly said my name. I spun around, instantly making eye contact with her. I quickly walked over to her and sat on the extra chair in her room.

"How are you?" I asked, my voice soft.

"Tired," she tried to smile. "And sore."

"Speaking of which," I hesitated, "can I ask you some questions about what happened?"

"I guess so," she shrugged. I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach when she gasped in pain as she readjusted.

"We don't have to do this right now," I said quickly. "You should get some rest."

"It's fine," she sighed. "Ask away."

"Okay," I started. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"I was. . . I didn't. . . I didn't get the beer he liked."

"Wait, what?"

"I could only find. . ."

"Donny beat you because you brought home the wrong beer?! That son of a bitch," I yelled. I stood up and started running out of the room.

"Wait!" Y/N yelled. I froze in the doorway and turned around. She had tears streaming down her face as she opened and closed her mouth. "Gator. . . Don't leave me. Please. He could come back. . . Please stay."

I instantly returned to my seat and grabbed her hand. "I won't leave until you feel safe," I whispered. "I promise."

She smiled weakly at me before falling back asleep. Just like I promised, I stayed by her side until my dad walked in.

"What the hell. . . Ohhh." He started to get angry but laughed when he saw whose hospital room I was in. I let go of her hand, stood up, and turned around.

"The officers told me you went to visit the victim you found today while responding to that 417," he smirked. "I thought you were batshit stupid. But now? Now I get it."

"Dad," I sighed.

"It's a good plan," he interrupted me. "You found her, brought her here. Any girl would fall for the guy who. . ."

"Donny's the one who hit her."

The look on my dad's face changed. "Her boyfriend did this?" He asked under his breath.

"Yeah," I sighed. "He got angry because she bought the wrong beer."

"Wow," my dad scoffed. "He's. . ."

"A fucking asshole," I finished for him. "I swear, I'm gonna find him and I'm gonna shove my gun so far down his neck that he'll. . ."

"Calm down, tiger," he laughed. "I'll have some officers go pick him up and take him to the station. Then we'll help Y/N get a restraining order against the dick. And, if you want, I'll have my friends make sure he leaves this town and never comes back."

"What am I supposed to do?"

My dad looked behind me before putting his hand on my shoulder. "Why don't you tell the girl you've had a crush on since you could walk that you'll never hurt her and will do whatever it takes to keep her safe?"

"But. . ." I stuttered.

"Go show her that she can bring whatever beer she wants to your place," he smirked.

"Dad. . ."

"Tell her that she can have a better life with you." He patted me on the shoulder before leaving.

"Gator?"

I spun around to see Y/N awake. "Hey, you," I smiled. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," she said slowly as she looked at the hallway. "Was that your dad?"

"Yeah," I said clearing my throat. "He heard what happened and wanted to know what he could do to help you."

"Really?"

"Of course," I said, walking over and sitting next to her.

She looked down and nervously played with her hands. I knew what question she was avoiding asking me. To help her, I decided to answer the unansked question.

"He's sending some officers to arrest Donny," I explained. "We know some people who can help you get a restraining order."

"That's not going to work," she said, her voice dropping.

"What do you mean?" I asked, scooting the chair closer to her bed.

"I've tried." When she looked up at me, she had tears in her eyes. "He knows people, Gator. People. . . people on the police force."

"Who?" I asked through my teeth. I cleared my throat when I realized how demanding that sounded. "I mean. . . I can make it stick. If not, we'll just get rid of him."

"Wait, what?" Y/N panicked.

"I'm kidding," I said quickly. I cleared my throat and lowered my voice. "Listen to me, Y/N. He is never going to hurt you again. I swear."

"How can you be so sure?" She whispered.

I ignored the butterflies in my stomach as I reached over and gently grabbed her hand.

"I will not let him hurt you," I said as seriously as I could. "If he wants to get to you, he'll have to go through me."

"Gator," she whispered. "Why are you. . . Why would you do that for me?"

"Because," I stuttered, "you're. . . and I. . . Well. . ."

"Gator," she gently cut me off.

"I like you," I forced out. I watched as her eyes widened.

"You what?" She asked, her voice soft.

"I like you," I sighed, knowing there was no turning back. "I know this is horrible timing, but I've had feelings for you for such a long time. Donny doesn't deserve you, Y/N. To be honest, I probably don't deserve you either. But I can try. I can take care of you. I can protect you. I can give you a good life. I can. . ."

Y/N grabbed my face and pulled me toward her, bringing my lips to hers. As soon as our lips touched, I started kissing her back. Without breaking the kiss, I sat next to her on the bed. I pulled her into my arms, not wanting to let her go.

When we broke the kiss, we were both out of breath. "I'm sorry, Y/N" I mumbled. "Donny broke some of your ribs. You need rest. Not some guy climbing on top of you."

"I wouldn't object to a certain guy climbing on top of me," she giggled as she played with my shirt. She looked up at me through her eyelashes, making my stomach do flips. "Gator?"

"Yes?" I asked quickly.

"You promise you can protect me from him?"

My stomach sank at her question. I pulled her into my chest, wrapped my arms around her, and relaxed us into the bed.

"I promise to protect you from Donny and anyone else who tries to take you from me."

[deltadarlingf1]

On the Reality of Dating a Famous/Wealthy Man:

I was going to post this on Twitter but decided I wanted to a do a long form post. So an explanation of this tweet, which was inspired by the screenshot just below it:

First a disclaimer: I am not at ALL saying Mick is anything like the men I'm about to talk about (I genuinely doubt it). I'm using this response to him hard-launching his relationship as an example of the mindset I see in a LOT of the young female F1 fans. If you read the gossip blogs, you've seen posts like this and worse, particularly on Charles, Pierre, Danny, and Carlos's gfs.

As I said in my tweet, if these young girls knew what it can be like behind closed doors for the WAGs of the rich and the famous, they probably wouldn't make statements like this.

I see a lot of younger fans here on social media posting their imagines and fan fics, and as someone a bit older than them, it does worry me. I know for most people it's simple fantasy and fun, but when I see things like the above I know there are some younger girls that really just don't get it.

My aim in posting this is that maybe it'll be a bit of a reality check for some of those girls. And I don't mean that in a bullying way, I mean that in a "please don't look at these smiling pretty girls with the closet full of designer, perfect body, and seemingly perfect life and feel bad about yourself" way.

Lastly, how do I know any of what I'm about to talk about? I wish I was just chatting shit, but I have lived through all of what I'm posting below as the daughter of a "man" of wealth. His money came from corporate life, not fame, but when you have as much as my "father" did/does, you rub elbows with the famous. Everything I detail below happened to me, my mother, and the wives of my "father"'s coworkers. I'm now watching history repeat itself as I've moved up the corporate ladder and find myself around millionaires and billionaires on a regular basis.

1. The "Starter Wife" Phenomenon

In wealthy circles there's the concept of a "Starter Wife". This is the woman wealthy/famous men marry because they were high school sweethearts, worked together early on, or they dated before the man had his "come up". Sometimes men marry these women and have kids for the SOLE purpose of having the "Family Man" persona. For famous men, this can be good PR. For wealthy men, this can boost their career.

A lot of these men fucking HATE their wives. By the time they have money, they want the freedom of single life back. They can now afford their "dream woman" and loathe being "stuck" with their current wife because of it. Leading to:

2. Serial Cheating

These men have all the money and resources they need to live a double life. Not to mention built-in time and an alibi: They're on the road all the time for their job, work trips, events, etc. No time unaccounted for because they're always working.

Some of those work trips to wine-and-dine clients include runs to the local strip club, escorts, and in some cases some of those escorts are of INCREDIBLY questionable age (in reality, they are victims of trafficking). Again, I wish I was talking out of my ass, I have seen this shit with my own eyes and wish to the Gods I hadn't. Then there's also:

3. Domestic Violence

This is bad enough when it's a wealthy man whose built that "Family Man" persona to protect himself, but it's even worse when they're famous. No one believes the victims, in some cases the woman is financially stuck and can't just take the kids and run when it happens.

And for some women it hard to leave the man they thought their partner was and, yes, to let the lifestyle go. Speaking of the lifestyle there's:

4. The Loneliness

This is a big one for the F1 girlies I see posting their imagines and fanfics and what not. The fairytale of "he'll make time for me because he loves me and I'd be special. I'd be different."

These men are busy as shit. That Cartier Bracelet you envy on these girls is often a "sorry I missed your birthday". The big bouquet of roses is a "sorry I had to leave our trip early." Yes, we know the joke "well at least I can cry in a Ferrari", but that shit will wear on you more than you can believe. I can't tell you growing up how hurt I was when my performances were missed, major dates were forgotten, or my proud life updates were met with "yeah, uh-huh, hold on I have to take this call."

Of course there are good times, of course there's memories you'll cling to, but when you're out, you often realize how alone you felt in the relationship. Lastly, and most poignant with this F1 WAG nonsense:

5. Keeping Up Appearances

You're no longer your own person in a relationship with these men, you are an extension of them. With famous men, you're a part of their "branding".

You have to look a certain way, act a certain way, talk to the right people, have the right friends. In the corporate-wealth world, that means making your partner look good, playing the part of the trophy wife and perfect mother. Smile in front of those coworkers that you know just spent the last business trip drinking, gambling, and cheating on their wives. Wear the right dress to the corporate dinner to make his coworkers envy him, but don't dress too sexy or he'll grow angry and think you're trying to cheat.

If you're dating someone famous, by the GODS, you better look immaculate in every post. You better be there to support him at his events, but if you're there too often you're "attention-seeking". You better have model good-looks, but if you ARE a model, you're "a jobless loser trying to profit on him". Don't post him on your IG, but if you happen to post that you're in the same city as him, you're "dropping hints". If he posts you, it's only because you "probably begged him to".

It's a maddening dance where you cannot win for losing. And once you break up, enjoy letting the world decide if he should have stayed with you, or if they're relieved that he finally got away from "that selfish bitch".

Do what you will with the above. I just wanted to get it off my chest. But I do hope that maybe, MAYBE, it'll give someone that needs it some perspective.

[toobusybeingdelulu]

when the card declines at therapy and they bring up: ‘then why are you so upset?’ ‘I’m not.’ ‘he causing you trouble?’ ‘why do you care?’ ‘because max we are family now, whether we like it or not, meaning I’m stuck looking out for you’ ‘my stepbrother has always been a dick but now he is just… angry. all the time. I guess I’m angry too…’ ‘my thirteen-year-old sister goes missing all day. and I find her with you. In a stranger’s house. and you lie to me about it.’ ‘what about billy? he seemed… wrong.’ ‘wrong is kind of like his default, but it’s nice to know he is not a murderer, ‘cause that would have totally sucked.’ ‘god I hope it’s not you. I really hope it’s not you.’ ‘it’s not my fault, it’s not my fault, max I promise you it’s not my fault.’ ‘what’s not your fault billy?’ ‘I’ve done things, max, really bad things. I didn’t mean to. He made me do it.’ ‘who made you do it?’ ‘i don’t know, it’s like a shadow. a giant shadow. please max.’ ‘what did he make you do?’ ‘it’s not my fault max please. I tried to stop him okay? I did. please believe max. please believe me.’ ‘billy it’s going to be okay. we want to help you. we want to help you. But you have to talk to us okay? you have to to talk to us.’ ‘billy your name is billy, billy hargrove. you live on old cherry lane, please I’m max, i’m your sist-‘ ‘BILLY!’ ‘I’m sorry.’ ‘Billy… Billy wake up. wake up. Get up. Please, Billy. Billy!’ ‘Dear Billy, I don't even know if you can hear this. Two years ago, I would've said "that's ridiculous, impossible." But that was before I found out about alternate dimensions and monsters, so I'm just going to stop assuming that I know anything. basically, ever since you left, everything's been a total disaster. And the worst part is, I can't tell anyone why you're gone. I can't tell them that you saved El's life. That you saved my life. I play that moment back in my head all the time. And sometimes I imagine myself running to you, pulling you away. I imagine that if I had, then you would still be here. And everything would be right again. I imagine that we could've become friends. Good friends, like a real brother and sister. And I know that's stupid. You hated me. I hated you. But I thought that maybe we could try again.’ ‘for a while, I tried to be happy. Normal. But I think that maybe a part of me died that day too. And I haven't told anyone this. I just can't. But I had to tell you. Before it's too late. If you can even hear this, and I really hope that you can. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Billy.’ ‘love, your shitty little sister, Max.’ ‘and, late at night, you have sometimes wished to follow me. follow me into death.’ ‘I wanted him out of my life. So sometimes I would imagine him crashing, dying in that stupid car. And I tried to forgive myself. But I can’t. I can’t.’ ‘rubbing alcol? what am I supposed to do with this?’ ‘kiss your bo boo and make it better, sis. Dumbass, what do you think you are supposed to do with it?’ ‘but t-that’s gonna hurt!’ ‘If you keep using that stupid skateboard, you are gonna get banged up. better learn to do that stuff yourself. can’t rely on others to do it for you.’ ‘okay. give it to me.’ ‘if I only could I’d make a deal with god and I’d get him to swap our places’

[rue-dixon]

Old Clothes

Modern au! Chilchuck and his family.

Flertom finds a box of her mother's old clothes in the attic.

Chilchuck's wife is named Bellana Sams.

Word count: 2,428

"Wow, Mom! I didn't know you had such cute clothes!" Flertom gasped, going through a big cardboard box she had found in the attic. Sitting on the kitchen tiles now as her mother sipped her drink at the table.

Bellana chuckled fondly as she watched her middle rummage through her clothes from the '90s - to the early 2000s.

"Oh, those old things? Honestly, I just didn't have the heart to throw them away." She sighed, resting her head in her hand.

Flertom stuck her tongue out in concentration as she rummaged around, pulling out a short denim miniskirt. "Cuuuute!" She squealed.

"Oh, that skirt was my favorite to go clubbing in. Although my parents and church hated it." Bellana sighed.

"You're so modest, I can't imagine you wearing something like this!"

Bellana rolled her eyes. "We were young and reckless back then. Your father and I used to sneak out to go drinking and clubbing as often as we could."

Flertom nodded as she dug more, pulling out a dark purple, frilly ruched bowknot top. "Why don't you dress like this anymore??" Flertom pouted, holding up a dark red bikini as well.

"Oh please, after three children I can't fit in any of that." Bellana laughed, "Besides, it would hardly be appropriate at my age."

Flertom huffed, "Aww but you look great for your age!"

"Thank you, sweetheart, but those clothes are hardly practical anyway."

"Then why are you still even holding on to all this stuff??"

Bellana shrugged with a soft smile. Standing up and sitting down on her knees with her daughter, having some trouble as she groaned softly.

"Sentimental reasons, I suppose. These are good memories, reminders of a time when life was simpler and your father and I were young and carefree."

She reached out to pat her daughter's hand, her eyes filled with nostalgia. "These clothes represent a part of our history, our love story. And honestly, some of the outfits are too pretty to part with."

"But they're just sitting in the attic.." Flertom pouted, holding up a long, off-the-shoulder white top.

Bellana sighed deeply, beginning to look through her old clothes as well. Memories came flooding back to her in waves. Both good and messy.

"I know I know.. I just can't bear the thought of them sitting in a thrift store.."

A soft smile slowly touched her lips as she looked back up to Flertom. "I'll tell you what, why don't you go through them and pick out some stuff you'd like to keep."

Flertom's face immediately lit up, her eyes wide and cheeks flushed as her smile looked like it'd slit her face in two.

"Really?! Can I??" She squealed.

"Of course, these clothes deserve to be worn still." She smiled, rummaging through the box before pulling out a baby pink, short dress, with white flower lace covering the skirt.

"Here, this should fit. You'd look beautiful, darling." She smiled, holding it up to Flertom's chest.

Flertom gasped at the gorgeous dress, it looked expressive. Immediately snatching it she squealed on the top of her lungs. Standing up and zooming to the bathroom to try it on. The noise caught the attention of her father who was in the garage that connected to the kitchen, causing him to poke his head in.

"Everything alright in here?" He asked, looking at Bellana as she giggled at her daughter's adorable excitement. Reminding her of when she was a little girl.

"Oh yes, Fler just found my old clothes." Bellana smiled.

Chilchuck smiled, "oh yeah?" Stepping into the room fully and shutting the door behind him. Walking up and leaning against the counter right behind his wife.

"Wow." He laughed, "they reek of cigarettes."

Bellana chuckled sheepishly, "Yeah.. smells like my teen years alright."

"I can't believe you still have that stuff."

"Of course I do, they're too nice to throw away."

Despite neither Bellana nor Chilchuck having much money growing up. Bellana would always save up for nice clothes like these. Fashion being everything to her at the time. The thought of throwing them out or donating them sounded absurd to her.

"Besides the memories of course." Bellana hummed, holding up a pink and white polka-dotted blouse.

"Like this one, I wore this on our first date." She smiled.

"Oh yeah, I remember. you looked so damn cute I couldn't take my eyes off you." Chilchuck smirked.

"As I recall you couldn't take your hands off me either." She chuckled, tossing the blouse back in the box.

Chilchuck pushed himself off the counter and walked over to his wife. "Can you blame me? You were, and still are, the most beautiful woman I've ever laid my eyes on." He leaned down and attempted to wrap his arms around her, only for Bellana to swat him away.

"Not now Romeo, us girls are at work right now."

As she said this, Flertom came racing back into the common area. "Sooo cute!" She screamed, jumping up and down while twirling in a circle. Fluffing up the skirt in her hands she twisted her hips back and forth.

Chilchuck and Bellana's attention was now on Flertom, eyes softening with affection. Bellana gasped, clasping her hands together and bringing them to her cheek.

"Oh my, look at you." She gushed, "Aren't you just adorable."

Chilchuck nodded in agreement, "You look just like your mother in that."

Flertom fluffed the skirt up and down as she still couldn't contain her excitement. Dancing around in place, fantasizing about what it would be like to be her mother frolicking in such a gorgeous dress.

Puckpatti rounded the corner with a class in her hand, going to the kitchen to refill her drink but stopping when she saw her older sister dancing in what looked like a princess dress met a dress for a school dance.

"What's going on?"

"Your sister's trying on my old clothes I had when I was your girl's age. Seeing if she likes any of them to take." Her mother gestured towards her sister who was still dancing around in her own little bubble.

Puckpatti raised a brow, putting her glass down as she walked over. Looking at all the cute clothes on the floor before looking into the box.

"Would you like to look too? You're welcome to any as well of course."

Puckpatti smiled, getting down on her knees as well as she picked at some resting on top.

"Yeah Puck!" Flertom now stopped, bending over next to her sister. "I bet some of this stuff would look great on you too!"

Puckpatti dug around for a moment, before pulling out a navy blue tube top with lace roses and lace trim on the top and bottom.

"Mom you owned something like this..?" Her eyes widened in disbelief. She couldn't imagine her modest and sweet mother in something like this.

"Oh yes, my parents were not happy with me." She giggled.

Chilchuck chuckled, remembering that top all too well. "I remember that one."

"Of course you do," Bellana muttered under her breath, rolling her eyes as she smacked his leg, it being the only thing she could reach.

"Gross!" Flertom whined, understanding her father's implication.

Puckpatti held it up to look at it better, "You're so proper, I can't believe it."

"Oh! It'll go great with this Patti!" Flertom gushed, grabbing the miniskirt she had earlier and handing it to her little sister.

Puckpatti smiled widely, "thanks!" Grabbing it and rushing to the bathroom to change.

A few minutes later Puckpatti came out, striking a pose with her hands on her hips. "Wow! My boobs look great in this!" She yelled.

Chilchuck choked out a cough, his ears turning red as covered his mouth. While Bellana let out a hearty laugh, a hand coming to her chest as she tried to catch her breath. That being the absolute last thing they expected her to say. Flertom on the other hand stood up and ran to her sister, admiring her outfit.

"Oh my god, they do! That skirt makes your legs look amazing too!" She squealed.

"I know right!" Puckpatti smiled, "I'm so keeping these!" the two girls began to giggle among themselves.

Eventually, the family's loud voices caught Meijack's attention up in her room. Coming down to see what all the commotion was.

"Ah Mei-Mei, your sisters are trying my old clothes on to keep, would you like some too?" Her mother smiled.

Meijack walked closer, glancing at the clothes her sisters were wearing and all the clothes scattered on the ground. None looked like anything she'd wear in a million years.

"Yeah Mei!" Flertom clapped her hands together.

"None of this stuff looks like me.." Meijack mumbled, kicking at some of the discarded clothes around.

Bellana chuckled, knowing her eldest had always been on the tomboy side, "That's alright sweetheart. I didn't expect you to like my old stuff, just thought I'd still ask."

Meijack nodded, going over to stand next to her father as she watched her sisters. Truthfully she did want to join her sisters, but none of that stuff looked like her or even would fit her. Meijack was a lot taller and thinner than her sisters. She didn't inherit the curvy figure that her mother was blessed with like her sisters did. So she doubted she'd be able to fill out most of those outfits properly anyway.

Chilchuck caught that small look of longing in his daughter's eyes and frowned. Sighing, he rested his hand on her shoulder.

"She owned plenty of jeans too you know. Not just skirts and dresses." He said softly, Meijack looked at him.

"But would they even fit..?"

"Only one way to find out."

She still hesitances for a moment, tugging at her sleeve before sighing. Crouching down next to her mother. Bellana smiled lovingly at her, happy she was at least giving it a try. After a few minutes, Bellana pulled out a black tank top that was just cropped at the waist, with a little symbol on the front in gold.

"Here," she smiled, "how about this."

Meijack looked at it, it didn't look that bad actually. With some hesitation, she reached out and took it.

"Yeah.. yeah this looks nice.." she mumbled. Causing all her family to smile, her sisters immediately diving into the box to find her something to match with it.

"Oh!" Puckpatti gasped, "What about these?!" She held up a pair of flared, low-rise jeans.

Meijack frowned, no way those would fit her.

"Those would be perfect!" Flertom beamed.

"Go try them on!"

"But-"Meijack tried to protest but her sisters were already pulling her to her feet and pushing her towards the bathroom door while shoving the clothes in her hands.

A few minutes later, Meijack reappeared, now wearing the black top and low-ride flares. Although the clothes were slightly loose on her, they did not look bad. The pants hung a little lower but not so much so it was unflattering or inappropriate. She tugged at the bottom of the shirt as she looked down at her body. The jeans still complimented he tall figure nicely, and the tank top fit her slightly muscular build well.

Chilchuck crossed his arms, "see, I told you."

He was happy Meijack was able to find something to her taste and didn't feel completely left out. He was aware of her insecurities, despite never being explicitly told about them.

Bellana smiled as well, "You look amazing, Mei, dear. It's a different look, but it suits you."

Meijack nodded as she looked at herself. Liking it nonetheless. Walking back next to her father who still stood with his arms crossed, looking over to her, "You like nice.." he mumbled softly.

Both comments caused Meijack's cheeks to flush as she picked at the jeans.

Flertom meanwhile went back to digging, before pulling out a beautiful, off-the-shoulder, yellow sundress, matched with a corset with sunflowers embroidered into it.

"How cute!" She squealed, unaware of the history behind it.

Chilchuck's eyes widened at the sight of the yellow sundress, recognizing it instantly. His face heated up as he coughed into his hand awkwardly. Bellana, too, noticed the change in Chilchuck's expression and shot him a knowing smirk, pink dusting her cheeks as well. Flertom, unaware of the significance and her parent's reaction, only focused on the dress's beauty.

"maybe.. don't take that one with you sweetheart.." Bellana chuckled nervously.

Flertom frowned, "why not? You said we could have anything we like.." she pouted, still clutching the dress, pouting at the thought of not being able to take the gorgeous piece with her.

Bellana and Chilchuck exchanged a glance.

Chilchuck, not very subtle with his excuse, chimed in, "Oh, well, that one's just... it's just a little too fragile, it's old. You wouldn't want to ruin it now, would you?"

Flertom looked at it confused, "It doesn't seem that old or fragile."

"Hey," Meijack suddenly spoke up, recognizing the dress. "Isn't that dress in the picture hanging in the living room?"

The photo she was referring to was of Chilchuck and Bellana dancing together at an outdoor party as teenagers. A popular story from when they were young that the girls have progressively learned more details about as they got older and more age-appropriate.

Meijack frowned, Flertom's eyes widening.

"Yeah.. now that you mention it. Hey isn't that night you guys said you got pregnant with Meijack" Puckpatti blurted.

Chilchuck groaned, covering his face in his hands as Bellana chuckled nervously. It wasn't a secret, but they both knew how.. dramatic their middle girl could be.

Flertom's heart sank as her face slowly turned red, her expression dropping. Before throwing the dress in the air and screaming.

"EEEEEWWWW!! Gross gross gross gross gross! I need to disinfect my hands immediately!" She screamed, flinging her hands in the air.

Chilchuck groaned as he pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. He knew she'd react this way, such a silly girl who was invested in her parent's love life but always drew the line when it came to intimacy in such a dramatic way. Which in hindsight, was hypocritical of him considering she got her dramatic tendencies from him.

While Bellana sighed knowingly, already knowing she'd react this way. Just watching and shaking her head, as Flertom began to run around the room.

"I touched the dress my parents had sex in!" She cried, zooming around the room as her sisters watched her. Puckpatti poked at the dress as Meijack wished she had earplugs.