#my gf of course has a cat and i would die for that cat shes perfecr

[butcharium]

I think there should be some sort of support group for lesbians with cat allergies

[theiloveyousong]

olive listens to the second act of falsettos for the first ever time on a plane very tired and slightly loopy: a liveblog (ish)

my not entertaining, very pathetic thoughts on falsettos. not proofread or edited for typos. read at your own risk.

okay before we begin let me preface by saying im finally just taking a bit to just LISTWN to this shit and trinas song emotionally destoryed me okay. okay

why is the first line just homosexuals. i mean yeah but still

oh this goes

weirdly happy though isnt this guy gonna die

BAR MITZVAH

YABADAVA THE EIGHTIES

ooh speed mode march of the falsettos

the lesbians!!

of course shes a shiksa

WHEEEEEEEEE! WOOOOOOO!

this gooooooes

oh its marvin

“two years” are you NORMAL now

good for trina

ezcept on tje jewish holidays

WHAT NO WHIZZER???

bring him back

HOMOSEXUALS

i wanna go to falsettoland except not really cuz ot would probs suck

yeah. grow tje fuck up

MARVIN. PLEASE.

wait how is he twelve and a half i had my bat mitzvah three months after turning 13

elaborate william finn.

jason stoooop butchering the hebrew. stooooop

im gonna give him a pass simply because ive heard worse

aww the tallit belssing. i think

WALKERMAN

“the last loving thinfh we’llprobably ever do together” noooo youre so emotionally intriguing aha

the whole things WHAT now man who i think matbe js whizzer but i cant tel marvin snd whizzer apart very well is that bad

good for fucking jason

this is my mom literally

hes gonna be a jewish adult

i cant tell wahts gping on (too zzzy)

omg a lesbian

“nouvelle bar mitzvah cuisine” cordelia i love you but please do not do this. just have fucjing bagels you cant go weong with bagels

CONGA

so proud pf jason

i am NOT dxcited for when my brother starts bar mitzvah prep

this song is titled miracle of judaism it has to be good

oh hes being a little straightboy

invite none of them just be a frienless loser like i was lamoo

no i had like four people there

you are TWELVE. DUDE.

you’re not swinging a goth gf you are TWELVE YEARS OLD

oooh baseball

ooooh JEWOSH baseball

same maevin

marvin stop calling your sona pussy

oh eitght its the Eighties

jason cannot play baseball

baseball ⚾️ ooh empji ⚽️ 🏀 🏈

WHIZZER

go off trina. love her

of course he love sbaseball

the lesbians are silly

oh my god. middle aged man core. hes so fjcking pathetic

jason *not 2 fiture penny put photo of cat kn box head here. no service on this plane*

even bald he looks good

stop thinking about your gay love and focus on your fucking sun. loser

i would love to watch jason play badebll (loe?

h

me when i hit the ball

this bitch gets SIX parents at hsi baseball games and my brother gets my mom and me not paying attention because soccer is boring as sbit sorry soccer lovers who also follow penny dimeshee on timblr pkay im rabong RAMBING

me when im in falsettoland

mendel is so bad at his job

this bitch sucks ass.

disgrace to the name of caroline fr caroline abbott would NEVER do such a thing

reagan and pagan as a rhyme ks genius

STOP SLEEPING WORH YOUR BOSS?!??

trina. thag is NOT how you prnounce it

sorry what.

just qhitnyour FFUCKIGN job. you cant do it anyway 😊☺️☺️

god i love ❤️ emojis

wbat a shock marvins back with whizzer

trina be normal please 🙏 i love you

trina calm your shit

yeah why CANT u let goe

as spon as they said that i know everytknhg not gonna be alright

i watched like half of a short clip of this from tje tonies and then went to bed becaus eit was like ten pm and i sleep early because i am a loser if any lf you compare me to bakugo my hero academia i will actually cry anyway the clip was good they were #exercising wby dod i go pn thos tangent

charlotte!!!!!!!!

me when i stick a lightbulb up my ass

okay shes being self important

aww

was that the first eff bomb

what aee they laying

whizzer my man marvin has matured stip raggingi kn him!!!!!!!!!’

god

i cant see anything out this plane window its like 10 pm. past my bedtime

OOH i lvoe me a good musical motif

anyone here watchind minions the rise of gru and know what the FUUCK goes on in it my brothers watcing jt and im so confused

THAGS NOT. WOAAAAAAH

HE DID MATURE!!!!!!!!!!!! “i want it all” “all i want is you” CHARACTER DEVEIPMENT GO OFFFFFF!! i want to write an essay about this man

they gave us quinoa chocolace crunches on the plane

theyre in the coty? damn i would jot think that. they feel like sone sort of pseudo-idyllic suburban lifestyle bitches

REPEATED LYRICS. AHHHHHHHH

Damn this shit is long

this sonf is incorrect i do not hate my parents

thag wasnt funny

jadon. honey. you are so lucky your parendes dotn involve you in bar mitzvah prep. do you want to pick out tablecloth swatches

jaosn i feel like you’re misunderstanding the purpace of the bar mitzvab

what kinda a name ks apple bum

SAUL

better call sa- he WHAT???? HWTA????? HIH????? WH?????? REELING

HE HAS PAITBJNGD OF WHAT NOW???????????????????????

matbe i should have done this while lucid

gonna take a wuick pause sk i can play shitty united app games

okay i got a high score of 0. om back

HE DOESNT yeah i thoight that

what the fuck was that mendel is thag ilatian. we are JEWISH. why did you top it off with dayeinu.

i did bate my paewnts at 12

jason dont you want to be counted in a minyan….

it is not in the torah

god did not say thag

sigh

jason do the fuckingn bar mitzvah.

HELP

even ykkur wife knows you cand do your hob correctly mendel…

one hour left onthe flogh ti can do this

can mtbrother turn his screen birghtness fown

sorry marvinim sore your love os wuite sweet but im gonan catch about four min of sbuteye

“try to stay both kind and young” okah thats powerful

okay marvin. good love ballad.

OH NO.

OH NOOOOOOOOOOO

“something so bad that words have lost their meaning”

whizzer soumds so tired

MARVIN. god i love him

everything is not gonna be alright

oh and now trjnas gonna make me sob

YEAH. 🤧😿

i have things to say about the repetition of everything will be alright and they will be said. eventually

“hahaha… not funny… okay”

gonna bawl my eyes out

“gefiltee fish” “gefilte fish?”

i need to watch this on stage

god he’s just a KID!!!

im not crying you’re crying

the fucking. camaderie.

i am crying on the plane and im trying not to be weird about it

JASON.

heart breaking

i am getting tje implications here bit the thing is i dont like the implications

ive heard this song on character playlists o think

points i SAW THAG LYRIC IN A COMPARISON TO WOE IS ME!!!

i just know jason bar mitzvahs gonna kill me

he brought tje prayer shawl!!

yeah this si. augh. making the best out of a horrible situation <333

would this ever work logistically? no. where is the rabbi? where is the torsh? but emotionally? i am crying my eyes out as i drscend over salt lake city utsh and im not even ahsmwed

MARVIN. GOD. im a marvin fan now not ashamed

they are NOT doing this bar mitzvah right

thats not an actual parshah. or actual trope. i need to stop pointing out inconsisternces

🤧🤧🤧 MARVIIIIIIIN.

ID LIKERO BELIEVE THAT ID DO OT AGAIN AND AGAIN AGAIN:(

waiteajtwait dont they say that thing in this has better come to a stop. OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

like wine

WERE JUST GONNA SKIP THAT STAGE.

there ar no word sor emojis that can express th e utter fucking heartbreak im going through rn

OH GOD ITS OVER.

PLEASE. PLEASE. PYU CANT DO THIS TO ME.

A REPRISE??? AS A FUCKING FINALE????

whoo boy.

—

hi its airport olive. thanks for getting this far! if you read this all you’re now legally obligated to marry me!

[donttouchtheneednoggle]

sense8 for the blorbo ask game? <3

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most) 

D A N I  thirsty asf adhd aroace finding a place where she is comfortable and has healthy boundaries and is loved for who she is, somehow the most me character ever <333

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

Sun 🥺🥺🥺 i KNOW she can kill me with her bare hands but also she is baby and deserves LOVE 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

capheusss god the sheer joy and hope and goodness he represents and god what a dork and #1 sun bak fanboy mun get in line he is so important <333

one of my favourite him quotes is the title of this blog and that’s not about to change :’)

ALSO speaking of detective mun my fucking beloved idk how underrated he is bc im not really around there much but i would DIE for him he is there for one purpose and that is to love sun bak even and often especially when she is beating the shit out of him and i love him for that

also he’s so 😳😳🥺🥺😍😍

that scene in the finale when he’s telling diego how sun brought him to meet her family then it just goes to this scene absolute peak of cinema <333

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week) 

*kicks down door* MR HOY

*punches desk* there’s no GIFS

n e way sense8 went what is the one thing that could improve this - sylvester mccoy and they were RIGHT

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

will i don’t want to like him he’s a cop so he sucks but in s2 when he’s just ill and traumatised and crying and being Held by his gf i gotta be like 🥺🥺 they let him do that huh good for him

ALSO jonas man is literally kilgharrah he’s such a cryptic and flaky bitch for NO reason godbless when will’s in the final dramatic car chase and jonas just plops down nexct to him bc he’s about to die and will’s jsut like NOT NOW JONAS yeah i felt that <33

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

...kala

LEMME EXPLAIN OK i only want good things for her and her to be happy but when she’s having a crisis it is soo fucking funny and relatable this girl is grappling with being demi and poly and cheating on her husband and falling in love with her husband and a TON of excessive moral ruminations and convictions that she’s a terrible person i am so projecting my ocd onto her godbless and being so salty and dramatic like deadpan saying she has something deeply wrong with her while she’s wearing cute blouses and cat patterned shorts its a little hilarious and i love her and ofc it all comes right in the end :’))

also lito in much the same vein as kala they both learn and grow so much over the course of the series often together all while being as salty and dramatic as possible about it good for them <33

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

LILA i hate her sm she’s the worst character of them all why is she here why is she like that writers you had one job

also whispers obvs but he’s not even worth getting mad at he is LITERALLY only there to provide stakes he’s not a person xx

ty littt 💕💕💕💕

[ssamie]

epilogue. “your girlfriend’s kinda hot”

kozume kenma x fem dazai!reader

(bsd x hq)

tw: mentions of suicide and suggestive themes + dirty jokes

masterlist.          suicide freak!

"hey uh, welcome to my stream i guess" he said as he spared the camera a quick glance "im not really playing tonight because an incident has recently occurred in this household" kenma said with a tired sigh 

nobody else knew it, but the said 'incident' was y/n accidentally setting half of their living room on fire 

the reason? apparently, she wanted to try burning herself to death in the furnace. obviously, it didn't work. and all that's left from that is more shit for kenma to clean up and a trip to yosano-san. 

kenma is stressed. and y/n is still alive. both of them are facing problems. 

"can you please wear a maid outfit- no."

kenma shook his head as he continued playing, glancing at the chat once in a while to read the veiwers' questions and comments

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: how about cat ears?! 

user: ^^ cATBOY CATBOY CATBOY 

user: u suck at this game wtf

kuroo.tetsu: hey kenma ;) 

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"first of all, i do not suck at minecraft thank you very much" kenma scoffed 

"second of all, go away kuroo. im still mad at you" 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: LMFAOOO kuroo what did u do?? 💀💀

user: he probably broke kenma's pc 

user: PLSS he's the one kenma’s throwing shade at on twitter 

kuroo.tetsu: STOP THE SLANDER 😔✋🏼

user: rooster head lookin ass 

user: ^^ NOT THE HAIR 

kuroo.testsu: 😃😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma sighed as he continued building a cute little cottage. he was currently vibing, just building y/n a cute cottage for her to probably burn later on. 

and he decided it would be nice to go on stream since his oh-so-lovely girlfriend was still out for work. 

ah yes, kenma has somehow kept y/n alive all those years. 

barely. 

hence why his phone was being bombarded with messages from her, all of which being blurry selfies. 

the photos had her sporting a huge grin while atsushi panicked in the background. 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: ayo, ur phone's blowing up 

user: do you have a girlfriend? 

user: KODZUKEN LET ME SUCK UR TOES 😋😋🤩

user: ^ ayo chill 😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma simply ignored them and continued on with his task. all was going well until a loud slam was heard. his cat-like eyes widened as he heard a familiar voice singing from downstairs, it was undoubtedly y/n. 

kenma chuckled nervously and muted his mic. 

but of course, cute dumb catboy didn't actually mute his mic. haha <3

he ignored all the questions in the chat, all of them being  speculations that he has a girlfriend. which he does, but they simply did not need to know that <3

"kenma~" she yelled out "i have a surprise for you!!" she said, followed by menacing giggles. 

kenma glanced at the camera before hopping off his gaming chair and peeking his head out of the door. 

"y/n, im streaming!! stay down there!" he yelled out in panic 

"aw, you're playing hard to get aren't ya?" she chuckled 

kenma deadpanned as he saw her limping up the stairs, with her bandages torn and unravelled, same with her clothes. he didn't really think much of it since this is usually how she comes home. 

its most likely just due to work and/or another suicide attempt.

"so, kenma.. you'll never know what just happened to me today" she started off with a goofy grin 

"im streaming, atleast let me turn it off first-" 

she paid no mind to him as she peeled off her ruined coat and pointed to her poorly bandaged stomach

"i got stabbed!" 

"you got what?!"

kenma furrowed his brows as he immediately rushed over to his side, cradling her face and waist as he inspected her injuries

"are you okay, kitten?" he asked worriedly 

"yep, apparently it wasnt deep enough to be fatal" she sighed dejectedly 

"please don't be sad about that." kenma groaned "can you undress?" 

"ara ara~ whats this?" she cooed "you're getting real bold, kenma" she smirked at him 

she unbuttoned her shirt and started pulling down on her skirt "but since you asked so nicely-" 

kenma simply sighed and shook his head. "i was gonna prepare you a bath but now im considering leaving you here to die" 

"but the second option would've been better though" she smiled at him 

"oh my fucking god." 

kozume kenma. (22)

╰─▸ university student, stock trader, pro-gamer, youtuber, ceo of bouncing ball lpt. 

╰─▸ y/n's struggling boyfriend. definitely needs a pay after all he's been through.

╰─▸ currently panicking because his girlfriend got stabbed.

l/n y/n. (22)

╰─▸ operative/member of the armed detective agency. 

╰─▸ kenma's girlfriend. kinda dumb, very hot to compensate for it. still hasn't died yet. 

╰─▸ currently bleeding and wounded. also hoping for severe blood loss.

"kenma, did you know" she mused in a teasing tone "lack of sleep and too much stress could possibly lead to poor memory and lack of awareness" 

kenma looked up at her with a look of confusion. he was currently kneeled down before her while she was sat on the bed as he cleaned her wound up with a damp towel. 

"why are you telling me this?" he asked 

"i just thought it probably applied to you" she snickered 

"why? i didnt forget anything-" 

he cut himself off with a huge intake of air. he slowly turned his head to look at the screen which still had his stream going on. to make it worse, the camera was on and they were both clearly in the camera's field of view. 

to make things worse worse, his mic was on the whole time and the live chat was in shambles. 

"i hate it here" he sighed 

kenma laid his head on her lap as he continued on patching her up, honestly not caring that this whole scene was being recorded for thousands or millions of people to see. 

"well, atleast the internet could finally see my beauty before i die" she laughed 

she ran her fingers through kenma's hair as he grumbled under his breath. kenma was a pretty private person. he made sure not to overshare, given his current 'influencer' status. and he was planning on keeping his relationship a secret, though it seems he can't do that anymore. 

"might as well say hi" she shrugged 

so of course, she then decided to walk up to the camera looking utterly dishevelled and roughed up. 

for context, the newly wrapped bandages around her stomach was being stained already by a crimson red hue and it was only getting worse the more she moved, undoubtedly messing up her wound. 

"hi, im kenma's girlfriend and if i see you flirting with him i will make you regret it" she grinned 

"y/n!" kenma groaned from the bed "you're close to dying right now, turn the stream off" 

ignoring him, she proceeded to read the veiwers' comments, laughing at some of them while she joked around. 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: heLLO?!?! 

user: GE HAS A GIRLFRIEND NOOO

user: bruh, did i just hear that right? were you fuckin stabbed? 

user: ur kinda hot tho

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma furrowed his brows as he reluctantly walked up behind her, reading the comments with varying reactions 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: well damn, hot bloody girl comes in and suddenly im lesbian

user: kenma looks so done

kuroo.tetsu: hi y/n ;) 

user: HER NAME IS Y/N

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"jesus christ shut up, kuroo" kenma grumbled out with a sigh 

"yup! yup! im y/n, and no, i am not a criminal. i swear." she shook her head 

"i got an injury from my job, that's all." she cleared up 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: tangina nyo sana ol

user: MSKAKAKKA

user: THIS IS LOWKEY ICONIC

user: time to scratch another gamer boy off my possible bf list 😔

user: girl wtf happened to u

user: that's wack bro 🚶‍♀️

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"great question, random person from the internet!" she beamed "see, what happened was.." 

"i went on a certain mission and got severely injured. though, when i called for help nobody responded" she said 

kenma furrowed his brows at her words. "why didn't anybody respond?" he asked. she sighed and fiddled with her torn bandages, pouting her lips as she does so. 

"well, when i told them that i was finally on death's door, all they said to me was 'congratulations!' and all that.." she said "what's your take on that, hm?" she asked kenma 

"im not surprised" he said 

she grinned at his words and leaned in for a kiss. "you're so mean to me, kenma~" she whined 

she licked her lips as she held his blushing face in her hands, she nuzzled their noses as she leaned in closer to him. 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

kuroo.tetsu: oh shit 😳

user: we all know where this is heading ;) 

user: sana ol talaga punyemas 

user: AYO CHILL 

user: why we goin so fuckin fasstttt 😳

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma hastily turned the camera off as soon as y/n's lips touched his. 

"kitten, were still- hmph-" 

he was only silenced as she slipped her tongue in his mouth, smirking lightly as she ran her fingers through his hair 

"thanks babe." she said as she pulled away, giving him a soft peck on his cheek and a nod "anyways.." she hummed as she turned the camera on once again 

she looked through the chat while kenma slaps his face to get rid of his blush. 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: ur fuckin freaky 

kuroo.tetsu: oya oya 😼😼

user: MS MAAM I JUST MET U AND I LOVE U ALREADY WJABSJSJJS

user: not me blushing chiiilllleeeeee 🏃‍♀️

user: KENMA IS FLUSTERED

kuroo.tetsu: kenma, i didnt expect this from u 😼

user: im so fucking JEALOUS GRR😡

user: girl r u bleeding rn 😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

upon reading a certain comment, she subconsciously grazed her fingers against her bandaged wound. her eyes slightly widening as she felt a concerning amount of wetness seeping through

she glanced at kenma who was still calming himself down and inspected her wound 

"oh my.." she muttered, though she couldn't help but let a smile slip through 

so like any normal person would do, she simply ignored her bleeding wound and the fact that she was getting a bit lightheaded. haha <3

"anyways, let's answer some questions!" she beamed 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: what's ur full name

user: what's ur job miss girl 

user: are you possibly looking for a gf, because i am more 

than willing to take the spot 🚶‍♀️

user: how did you meet?? 

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"alright, those are all very nice questions" she chuckled. kenma, who's now calmed down, sat down beside her to look at the chat. 

"first, im l/n y/n" she mused "nice to meet ya" 

"second im a detective! mhm, im cooler than your fathers" 

"third, it depends, belladonna" she cooed as she sent the camera flirty smirk "are you perhaps willing to join me in a double suicide?" 

"oh god.." kenma grumbled. he pouted at her and shook his head in disapproval. "don't flirt with random girls" he whined 

"why not?" 

"uh- because i am your beloved boyfriend, is that not good enough of a reason??" 

"... anyways, we met at a cafe way back in high school" she said with a smile "also, i asked him to join me on a double suicide" she said 

she was smiling and nodding as if it was the most normal thing in the world, all while kenma nods along 

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: wtf are u okay 🗿

kuroo.tetsu: teenage romance 🤩

user: cute ❤️

user: im concerned ❤️

user: ur a detective?? cool

user: LMAOO I'LL GO ON A DOUBLE SEWER SLIDE 

WITH U MOMMY 😩😩😋

user: ^^ SAME 😩

user: CHOKE ME WITH THOSE BANDAGES MOMMAE 😩

user: u r still bleeding 🚶‍♀️        

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma was simply glaring at the chat as more compliments and flirtatious comments came flowing in, all of which were directed to his girlfriend. 

"this is why i didn't wanna let people know about you.." kenma grumbled 

"aww, why not?" she asked with a playful pout 

"people are flirting with you." he sighed "also, stop asking for my girlfriend's onlyfans! she doesn't even have one!" he snarled

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: LMAOO CATBOY IS ANGRY 😩

user: y/n-senpai spit on me 😡😡

user: drop the onlyfans 

user: chupapi munyanyo 😩

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"anyways, i'd hate to ruin the mood" she chimed in with a sluggish giggle "but im so wet kenma" she whined out 

a menacing smirk was etched on her lips as kenma spluttered in response, a bright red hue covering his face almost instantly as he faced her with widened eyes 

"y-y/n! why would you say that?!" he whisper shouted 

"cuz i am" she whined out as she grabbed his hand and trailed it down her abdomen 

she faced the camera and gave them a shit-eating grin as kenma mumbled out incoherent words 

"y/n we should-" he cut himself off as he felt the concerning amount of blood drip down his whole arm 

kenma's face paled as he looked up to see her smiling like a kid in a candy store, completely unbothered. 

"y/n, you idiot! why didn't you tell me!" kenma exclaimed 

"um- my girlfriend is bleeding. excessively. so uh- bye i guess" it was all he said before hastily ending his stream and turning off his computer. 

"y/n, let's get you to a hospital" he said as he reached down to carry her away. though she simply slapped his hands off and closed her eyes. 

"nope. this is my time, kenma. don't ruin it for me" she said 

"you're fucking dying!!" 

"well, would you like to join me?" 

"no"

"damn." she muttered in response 

"so...wanna fuck?" she asked sheepishly 

"for the love of god-" 

this was so messy :/

[danepopfrippery]

What We Do in the Shadows: A Rewatch Part 2

Now for the lgbtqi fans: I wanted to go down the Nandor Guillermo route. One fan asked if straights really didnt read Guillermo as gay originally. I can only speak for my boring straight ass but no I didnt. I just take TV as it comes to me, so I dont read into any of it. But unlike what I hear are some shitty reddit fans, I would strongly disagree that the vampires are straight. They have all basically openly admitted to fucking any and every gender and have bi yearly orgies (which Nadja says is ‘ok’ only lol). In fact you could even argue the only really monogamous leaning one is Nadja, as she tries to resist Jesk and never does more than kiss him. But she doesnt seem to care what Laszlo gets up to (literally any and everything) tho she did seem shocked he was dumb enough to fuck ‘anything with long brown hair’ incl Nandor (2X9). I don’t think u can really roll with this show if you aren’t open to all of that.

As for Guillermo he was the general sexless blob in season 1. Season 2 they seemed to be steering him towards women, having him reference if hed stayed at Panera he might have a gf by now. In The Curse (2X4) hes like the action hero saving Shanice. Which can we stop and discuss how ungodly awful she is as a character? I’ve enjoyed every character on this show except her. She doesnt have a real stutter, shes just really bad at speaking. And shes fucking annoying. God I hate her. He should have let her die. But hes too sweet. Thankfully thats the last we’ve seen of her since.

I remember reading an interview towards the end of Season 2 when the interviewer asked Harvey if Guillermo may get his panera bread girlfriend, or what did he want to see. He said nah, and then stated he was gay. I was a little surprised because I just never thought about it. But after that the writers seemed to go full Nandermo which hey why not?

I think Guillermo as a whole character read as just nothing especially to me was the orgy ep hes just dying of embarrassment (grew up VERY catholic) and then stated he wouldnt be partaking cuz he doesnt do anything with anyone. But then when he ran away to the fake vampire (Collaboration 2X8) he seemed...down with the orgy idea but left his dicky on at the least. BTW contrasting Shanice, the best random character is Sam the Cat and I’d like to see more of him. Of course Nandor has eaten cats so hes prbly wise to stay away. As for them as anything well, unlike the nandermo fans Im not holding much hope as an actual plot point. I’m convinced Nandor literally sees him as basically one step below Ja-han (his beloved horse). In the first ep of Season 3 Nandor is the only one to really take pity on Guillermo. He had in the past (checking in on him and trying to win him back in 2X8). He warms some raw chicken for him, keeps them all from immediately killing him for a month lol. When they decide not to kill him and four way hypnotize him, Guillermo thanks them and says he sees them as family. Nandor cuts him off and is like ‘yeah no one cares about ur life story.’ When he says his ‘promotion’ isnt much of dick, Nadja states its better than being dead and ‘bloody better’ than being a familiar. So basically to them familiars are all but dead...they think very little of them. This has been stated several times before, which also shows why before Benji we had not met a familiar turned vampire (but Nandor ONLY did it for Guillermo, which was sweet).

When Guillermo does run away again (2X10) Nadja muses this is why you don’t get close to humans, they either leave or die and muses the cameraman looks like he’ll die soon (I think he said he was 27 lol). Living for 700 years really skews your viewpoint. Nadja is prbly about 500 years old (Nandor is 700 and destroyed her village ‘200 years before she was born’) and assuming they had a familiar for at least 50 years thats 10. But they went thru 10 like in 2019 lololol so shes prbly even more jaded than the avg vampire.

Ja-han (John but basically ‘my universe’ according to people who speak Persian) was Nandor’s horse he loved so much it kept his spirit from moving on. I get it...I tried picturing being in a survival setting and having to kill one of my cats for food. I’d rather die. So hes braver than I am. (Yes Im sure my cats would eat me if it came down to it but their welcome to it).

So we basically open Season 3 on 11 years of Guillermo being there, and Nandor mostly missing him for his slave duties at first, then kinda actually caring about him. I just really vibe it as like your pet, you’re special little guy who is not on your level. I do think when S3 opens and Guillermo references codependency, I do think thats for ALL of them. Some of those assassins were nowhere near Nandor (clean more quietly Im trying to sleep!) but he still saved Laszlo and Nadja.

Its in ep 2 with the cloak Im convinced Guillermo actually realized he cares about Nandor in a more than boss/friend way. He seems shocked when Meg suggests that. What he made of those thoughts afterwards we don’t really know. But when Gail enters the picture again I think he realizes he might need to do with it sooner than later, especially when the ring is brought out. By the Casino ep Guillermo is about to state hes gay before he gets cut off.

I dont think Nandor even realized he fully was in crisis until they ascended the council. Nadja asks wtf is wrong with him, given his love of ceremony (all mail opened in the fancy room) and now hes just mush. He, like Guillermo, seemed confused. Also like Guillermo, he seemed to not look in the house, but outward.

I dont put much stock in that dick fondling scene (omfg that was a ride...and I think mostly fully had us distracted from the actual main plot point). Guillermo finds semen everywhere (2X9 Witches) and MAKES A BUSINESS OFF OF IT. He was also tasked with the orgy prep and I cant imagine Nandor put all those dildos on his own (boy theres a scene we could have used seeing lololol). Someone on here noted he had the dupe body and broke the door down as Nandor was plowing Gail. So I think dick size isnt news to Guillermo...never mind the pantsless dancing in the Gail ep. Someone also said they thought the esteemed vampires heard Guillermo and Nandor arguing (heightened senses) so the fondling scene was just to fuck with him. I like that theory...it vibes with canon. Also very David Cross thing to do.

If all the footage from the preview ad is new, I think the sexy fight scene between Guillermo and Nandor is about him proposing to Gail yet again. Because theres a shot of that and according to Nadja he does that shit all the time. Maybe Gail accepts. Guillermo would not be thrilled (guardian of his heart after all). Also frankly traveling alone is enough of a reason...this man literally didnt know how to pay at a grocery store cash wrap (first ep). How he’d make it is beyond me. I dont think he could see Delaware on his own and be okay lololol.

If there is to be any Nandermo I think it would be next season. Guillermo is his bodyguard but the vampires all constantly forget it and only rarely treat him as above a familiar (basically a slave that shouldnt be seen or heard). Guillermo would have to do something to really put him on equal footing before I think Nandor would even acknowledge that possibility. The fight could do it...someone here noted they would be pretty equally matched (Nandor has super vampire strength and Guillermo is crazy vampire killing talented). Probably one of the only times Nandor looked genuinely proud of him is when he was full vampire rampage in the finale of season 2 (look out behind you!) It was short lived tho (who cares you didnt pick up the fucking laundry lololol).

Whelp 4 more days. I’ll prbly do one more rewatch. God I love this show. Next year wont be soon enough!

[tokumusume]

Everything hurts and I’m fine: Eternal Love episodes 5 - 10

Join me for another round of suffering and hot men (mostly suffering).

Not a scene by scene recap, just random thoughts.

Sad and h0rny boy Li Jing takes Xuan Nu to his home and marries her, but she’s a scheming bitch. He can’t stop thinking about Si Yin and spends his little screentime looking like a puppy who got lost during the moving.

Wet Mo Yuan alert! Could that water be more transparent tho...? 👀

I’m starting to understand what’s up with ghost Snape Mo Yuan...

Everyone goes to war. Moses Mo Yuan parts the sea, Ninth disciple dies (rip man, you were cute), Ghost King (not Wen Kexing) tries to suck the entire world into a magical bell/vortex but of course Mo Yuan sacrifices himself to seal him, just like he told Si Yin he would do if the need arises.

Mo Yuan is dead. Or is he? Si Yin wants to try a little necromancy to preserve his body for an eventual awakening. She gives him her blood because she’s a nine-tailed fox and nine-tailed fox blood works as embalming fluid. Take note, future morticians!

A little orphaned girl is introduced to the Heavenly King and YIKES, the look on Dijun’s face as he follows her with his eyes is disgusting. Please tell me I’m overreacting.

Mo Yuan’s fake lotus is dead (just like him). It turns into a cloud of glitter and enters the body of a woman thought to be infertile. Oh god, I know exactly where this is going...

Xuan Nu complains that she’s not getting any ghost D since the day she married Li Jing and I lol’ed.

Si Yin steals Mo Yuan’s body and goes back to her home. #true_love #grave_robbery

AND... of course, the previously infertile woman gives birth to a boy only days after touching Mo Yuan’s lotus. It’s Mo Yuan 2.0, aka Ye Hua. He’s clad in black, he’s brooding, he still has one facial expression.

Bai Qian’s set to marry Second Prince Zhao Jing and is ghosting him. He falls in love with her snake maid instead and it goes as well as you expect. Which is not well at all. Ye Hua is a f*cking snitch and rats on him when he takes his snake gf to Heavenly Realm. She’s imprisoned and tortured.

I forgot to add that we got a timeskip and it’s 70,000 years later (yeesh) and Si Yin is Bai Qian 24/7 now.

We get a sad backstory about Ye Hua. Turns out he wears black all the time to hide injuries from his mother. For real. Such a drama king.

Dilireba appears! So pretty... She’s saved from imminent death by Dijun (who just happens to be nearby) and istg they gonna have to work to make me swallow this couple. SHE IS A CHILD NEXT TO HIM. She’s literally child-coded!!!

The King tells Ye Hua not to be a slave for p*ssy like his Second Uncle, then his First Uncle (who I keep mistaking for Zhe Yan but Zhe Yan has a cute bow on his pink robes) tells him the opposite. Ye Hua swears he’s not weak like that. We’ll see in a few episodes.

Bai Qian’s wedding to Second Prince Zhao Jing is cancelled due to popular demand and she’s promptly betrothed to Heavenly Realm MVB (most valuable bachelor) Ye Hua. He’s soooo excited...

Xuan Nu (I love to hate her, Bambi Zhu is so good!) is hella mad that her husband Li Jing banged a random maid without condoms and got her pregnant. She bitch-slaps the maid and sends her to die in some awful place. Where is Li Jing btw? Too busy making babies to make an appearance? I miss his sexy face.

Bai Qian’s brother (Yu Menglong) is so cute!! I love his little mouth! Brb, I have to stalk his Weibo.

Bai Qian managed to calm down the Ghost King inside his bell prison but he’s still powerful enough to kick her to the Mortal Realm to suffer. Ah shit, here we go again... She lost her memories but got a cute kitten that looks exactly like my own cat (dm me for pics of my cat). It’s a win for me.

~ end of episode 10 ~

SO MANY THINGS happened in five episodes, it was hard to stop myself from writing down everything (a lot of bloggers already recapped this drama much better than me). Thank you for reading my ramblings and see you next time!

[sleepyhollands]

🍎-tom taking care of his gf when she has really bad cramps please :)

“tommyyyy....” y/n whined as tom got out of bed, startling her from her not-so-good night of sleep. now she was fully awake, and the morning cramps were hitting her hard.

“what is it, dear?” tom chuckled as he pulled on some sweats across the room, stretching a bit.

“started my period last night. bad cramps.” y/n was clutching her stomach, now curled up into the fetal position. tom’s eyes softened as they laid upon her, filling with empathy.

“what can i do, ’m love?” he asked, walking back over to her and kneeling by the side of the bed, stroking the back of her head. “can i get you anything?”

“some advil?” y/n pleaded. “maybe my heating pack?”

“okay,” he whispered, kissing her nose.

“wait, tom,” she stopped him as he got up, grabbing his wrist when he turned away. “can we cuddle when you get back?”

“’f course, love. ’m off work all day, can be with you the whole time.”

y/n gave him a half-grin, too tired and in too much pain to really mean it. but the thought was there.

tom soon returned with her meds and heating pack, feeding y/n the pills and adjusting the warm sack on her abdomen before snuggling up behind her, spooning her. he placed tender kisses to the back of her head and hummed a tune while she let the effects of the medication and the heat wash over her.

“thanks, tommy,” was all y/n said.

“what would you do without me, darling?” he teased in response.

“mmh. prob’ly die.”

he laughed at that, shaking her body with his in his arms. “it’s a good thing i’m here then, my love.”

taglist: @definitely-not-black-cat @harrysleftchelseaboot @quaksonhehe @darlingspidey @sunflowerhollands @caswinchester2000 @joshuaparkers @jackiehollanderr @screamholland @nervousdadmode @amii-nyc @tomshufflepuff @solarxmoonchild @peepeeparkerr @the-crazy-fanfictionist @spidey-holland-96 @ifilosemyselfagain @perspectiveparker @tonguetiedholland @young-romanoff @pterprkr @auggie2000 @hypnotized-so-mesmerized @multifandomlover121 @hazmyheart @1missglum1

[a-tcos]

Can I ask for some modern horror au Black Butler headcanons?

YES because this is sort of similar to an RP I’m in AND corresponds w/ an AU or two I have (I’m just gonna write them as humans here unless specified otherwise). Thank you for sending this!!: 

Sebastian is one of the first people to die. It’s nothing personal, I just see him as dying quickly because it’s unexpected. FAR less likely to die if he’s dealing with something paranormal. He’s more experienced when it comes to that. People would just want to kill Sebastian, I’m not gonna lie. However, Sebastian is Ciel’s guardian so he’ll definitely protect him, sacrificing his life if needed. Seb would definitely be some sort of influencer and or “accountant”. He makes decent money - enough to support a comfortable life for him and Ciel - but it’s not important to him. 

Ciel is definitely survivor material despite accepting death. He does rely on Sebastian for a lot of things, but I also see him as at least somewhat self-sufficient while with Sebastian. If Sebastian dies, he instantly becomes more self-sufficient in order to survive. 

Mey-Rin, Bardroy, and Finnian all live together; Bard is essentially their dad despite being their friend (he’s older than them so it works), while Mey-Rin and Finny often work with Sebastian and sometimes hang out with Ciel. Finny is only four years older than Ciel while Mey-Rin is a few years younger than Sebastian. They’re definitely still comic relief but they’re all knowledgeable about survival and WILL survive when they’re on their own. With Sebastian and Ciel around, their survival rate goes down.

Grell is VERY genre-savvy to the point where she survives at least halfway-through the horror or IS the horror. She still has her chainsaw, of course. She still likes blood and the color red. It’s only fair to say that she’s not opposed to the idea of causing some chaos. That said, I still see her as an ally to Sebastian and Ciel. Perhaps she would just be the one to fight the big bad horror. She’d definitely be a beauty guru that also talks about true crime. 

 William was Grell’s major crush (aside from Sebastian, a man she briefly dated) but she moved on to date Hannah. He’ll surely die with unrequited love towards her and a small crush on Sebastian (or was he just jealous that Sebastian had had what he now wanted?). He’s a business man. Doesn’t believe in ghosts or the paranormal. 

Ronald is Grell’s BFF. While he’s not dumb, he’s very brave and even foolhardy. This leads him to investigating areas and topics that could lead to his death. Very fun still, I love him so much. Also an influencer like Seb, but lives more modestly because he doesn’t have a child used to a rich lifestyle to take care of. 

Alois puts up a tough front, but he’s deathly scared. Even more clingy and doesn’t want to leave the house. If he thought about how horror could lurk inside his own home, he’d probably implode. Definitely a victim type (sorry bud). 

Claude screams genre-savvy to me as well, but in a different way than Grell. I see both of them as horror and true crime fans, but Claude is quiet about it. I see him most likely surviving or surviving to the end. I do see him being a potential big bad horror (in fact, he’d definitely kill Sebastian if given the chance). In my AU, he’s a writer who often stays up late, so he’d definitely get to see some spooks.  

Hannah Annafellows is Grell’s GF (in my specific AU lol) and works in helping domestic abuse survivors. 100% survivor when it comes to horror. She’s good for it. If I could only choose two characters to survive, it’d be Ciel and Hannah.

Soma and Agni are definitely present (I love these two). Soma is a scaredy-cat and a bit dumb but would somehow survive for a good amount of time. If there’s a slasher, Agni’s going to live longer than Sebastian. If it’s paranormal, it’s a toss up. I still see Soma as Indian royalty but obviously in a much more modern way. Therefore, Agni would also be by his side to help him in the UK (where I imagine this would take place unless they’re explicitly in the USA or going to the USA for a trip.) 

I would LOVE to write some drabbles/scenarios of this AU (possibly even inspired by specific horror movies) so if anyone has specific movies in mind, lmk! I’ll either post it here or on AO3 at atmmmmm. 

[daddy-daichis]

Yesterday the very beautiful and talented @fuwari-s tagged me in this game and since that post is already really long i figured id make a new one lol  (Also thank you for tagging me, it made me so happy)

The Game: Tag your 2D lovers + the other trend I saw yesterday and wanted to do which is Would you actually date them IRL. So ill put that under the cut because it is a lot.

HQ: Atsumu, Daichi, Issei, Bokuto, Hinata, and Kyoutani

BNHA: Bakugou, Denki, and Hawks

JJK: Sukuna and Mei Mei

Others: Kagami from KNB, Levi and Jean from AOT, and Mikoto Suoh from K

So if you want to know if i would date them irl that is below the cut lol

As for tagging... if you want to do it :) @eijirosriot @bokutosnumberonefan @hinosreis @tetsus-kitten @sugawarakoushihoe @mynameisjackattack and anyone else who wants to do one or both of these challenges.

Alright so would i date these men (+ mei mei) in real life. Short answer is yes lmao. Long answer, with some headcanons that may or may not  venture into 18+ category but only slightly. all aged up to be my age which is 26.

Atsumu - PLEASE, YES

we would be so chaotic together but he would also be really loving. As long as he can still prioritize me in a relationship, not over volleyball, just as much, then we will be golden. We would have such a good time and i feel like we would have a lot of fun bickering, which i really enjoy. Play fighting as a form of foreplay, if you will lmao. We’d probs be friends in HS and then get together after he starts playing for MSBY and he is secured in his position (and himself tbh). I just love this cocky bastard. he also gives me switch vibes and as a switch, i love that for me.

Daichi - YES

All i need is to be wrapped in his arms on the daily and i would be happy. Man would know how to take care of me and that is all. Love of my life, too good for this world. Wholesome husband. He would be able to manage my crazy side and chill me out when i get to anxious. I would want to be bratty just to get him to drop his good guy routine sometimes and I feel like he would like that.

Issei - YES

Funeral home employee can get it. Matsukawa Horse cock Issei can whisk me off my feet and straight into bed. we would have a lot of fun picking on oikawa together (out of love of course) but we would balance each other out a lot. His darker humor would go well against my lighter humor. Also I feel like our level of hotness is pretty comparable... like we aren't the prettiest in the friend group but still good (if that makes sense)

Bokuto - YES

Big ball of sunshine to light up my day, he would literally fuck the sad out of me every day I just know it. Like atsumu, as long as I am a priority to him itll work out. We also kind of have the same sad moods so I feel like we could either both just curl up on the couch together and watch a movie or bring the other out of a funk easily. I love this giant himbo so much.

Hinata - most likely yes

Pretty much the same reasons as bokuto but I feel like I would get drained of his energy faster, so he would def have to cuddle me more. For everyone else so far I can imagine being high school sweethearts, but with hinata i think he wouldnt settle down until later, or even start dating so it would probably be a lot of pining and watching him from the side lines for a while, which would be really hard tbh. but the way he would smile at me after a match would make it worth it so...

 Kyoutani - Hard YES

I love a boy with anger issues, what can i say... (cough couch my irl husband with anger issues couch couch) I would love to be his weak spot and the one person he would go to to help him not feel angry anymore. I think that my fun personality would help him to unbox himself a bit. I just want to give him cuddles and a place to feel accepted. id also i KNOW hes a monster in bed... 

Bakugou - FUCKING HARD YES, PLEASE

if he was real the things i would do to and for him... A lot like kyoutani i would want to give him a place where hes accepted, and a place where he is unconditionally loved. I would be able to handle his misguided anger and calm him down and give him space. I headcanon that hes very cuddly in private to just his S/O which is something that i love. I love his lil smirk and would do anything to get him to smirk at me. As long as he is able to set me as a priority it would work out, but that would be what he struggles with so it would be a thing we would have to talk about. But I also feel that once you say something about it he would check in with you because of course he has to be the best bf/husband. I feel like I could talk for hours about him so Ill just wrap it up by saying that I love me a passionate man who would probs be a lil possessive, and I would use that to my advantage. 

Denki - GOD YES

I really do think that denki and I are soulmates. we are both the perfect blend of funny, pervy, while still being soft. I feel like there would be a lot of mutual pining at first but he would end up the golden retriever gamer boy to my alt bisexual and thats just the perfect pairing. We would pull so much shit and then get away with it because thats just us being us. I see us being scolded by bakugou a lot for the stupid shit we would pull. Also late night drives in his shitty tuned car to taco bell while we sing alt rock songs from the 2010s. also the switch vibes are immaculate.

 Hawks - Probably

So it would honestly depend a lot on what version of hawks.. him in the hero commission is a no, because he wouldnt be able to be honest with me about a lot of stuff. Like his name, or when i can see him again, and that would give me too much anxiety. When hes free of them and is actually allowed to be himself I think it could work then. I know that he of course wants to still be the best hero, so he would have the same problems as bakugou with finding a balance, but if he wants to i think he could. He would also have a lot of trauma from his relationship with his parents and the commission so I dont know if he would be able to give his love away as freely as he wants so we could get therapy together. I love that for us. But i would happily wake up next to this beautiful birb man if he would have me.  

Sukuna - A hesitant yes

so.. the anger issues that ive mentioned before.. yes. I would like sukuna. I would be his lil bride and sit on his lap on his throne as long as he didnt kill my loved ones or my cats lmao. I would also be ok with being his and itadoris gf while hes living in itadoris head. being with him is just asking for an unhappy ending tho, whether its a life always on the run, or someones trying to kill me, or someones trying to kill him, or hes trying to kill someone. But yes i would like to be with him but that would mean sacrificing a lot. 

Mei Mei - god yessssss..

Please Mei Mei step on me and make me ur lil house wife. I see us living in a pent house apartment with the most breathtaking view of the Tokyo skyline. I would want for nothing and she could take me where ever she wanted and i would just follow her around with heart eyes.

 Kagami - YES

my basketball husband! i love him and would love to be loved by him. Id follow him wherever. He would take care of me and is just so dreamy.. also i guess the mild anger issues.. but hes really not that bad. He would just be such a good s/o. He would cook us nice dinners, wed have a few cats, and he would carry me around a lot because hes so strong. While were on the topic of strong... his stamina... everyone on this list probably has good if not great stamina... but kagami just hits different..... have you seen him in the zone? have you seen his thighs? his sex zone has got to be incredible. 

 Levi - Yes

I was going to say it depends, but really it doesn't... if were in the aot universe and hes my captain and I fall in love with him u can bet ur ass im gonna try and get with him because i could die at anytime. if its some au where he is here in our universe and somehow we meet... like of course im gonna be in love with him. our height difference isnt too bad, im only like an inch or 2 taller than him. I think we would both have a great time together. I would make him laugh, and he would help me clean, because lord knows I hate cleaning. BUT i hate cleaning because its something that I always have to do alone, and I feel like levi would have us be cleaning together like he makes the scouts do. and hes just so sexy... 

Jean - big yes

This beautiful handsome man... idk what to even say about him. Hes strong, funny, handsome, cocky, but very much full of love. would love to run away from the world with him. I feel like if he was in love with me before *tries not to give away spoilers* the marco incident (?) that after he would become very clingy and attached and im ok with that. There would have to be lots of cuddles and reassurances and i just want to see him happy and not at war, with both real life people and himself... id give him the best kisses and he would become addicted to them. 

Mikoto - No? But maybe...

I feel like we could be.. but if you watched the show then you know.. But i would love to be Homra’s princess TBH. No one would mess with me or they would have to face the wrath of my big fire boyfriend and his whole ass gang. But on the other hand I feel like Mikoto wouldnt allow himself to fall in love, so it would probably be a hush hush topic. everyone knows the boss and I are in an entanglement, but they cant talk about it. Then Anna starts asking questions to Mikoto and he has to come clean to her, which would be so cute. He tells her is a secret but she doesn't care lmao. in conclusion, I would want to, but I dont think he would let me.... Maybe friends with benefits tho....

............................................................................................

ok if you read all this im officially in love with you. Please take my heart. 

This took me like 2 hours to do because I love thinking about it so much. if you have any thoughts about any of this hop into my dms or comment on this because id love to hear them (especially if you think i belong with one more than the others lmao). 

[justalokifanaccount]

Episode 5-Play by Play Reactions (Spoilers)

Bruh I’m so friggin excited

Thanks for reminding me of mobius and Loki being pruned… I totally needed that

Man tom has really beautiful eyes

IM SO EXCITED FOR ALLIGATOR LOKI

Back in the TVA huh?

Upside down Dutch camera angle huh?

I really hope they introduce Kang, I mean, Ravonna IS Kang’s GF in the comics

Okay we left the TVA

Ruined New York purgatory?

Digging this soundtrack

Alioth??? Hello??? Who is you???

Ravonna doesn’t know either? Hmmm I don’t trust her

BRUH I CALLED IT!!! THEY CANT DESTROY TIMELINES THEY CAN ONLY CUT THEM OFF

I don’t believe her… if she really wanted to know who was behind this after watching the timekeepers prove to be fake then why on earth would she prune Loki then huh?

GATOR LOKI IS SO CUTE

Damn emotional Loki

“Which I’m heartbroken to report I didn’t even find all that strange.” Poor baby

Bruh stop trippin

Bruh I’m trying so hard not to laugh rn. The way old Loki is talking to alligator Loki is killing me. I have been watching Jessie recently with the kids I babysit and now I’m being reminded of Mrs. Kipling, the Asian water monitor.

Loki is so done with this lmaoo

Okay wow these subtitles are having big trouble keeping up and staying accurate…

Poor Loki lmao

Kid Loki killed thor oh my gosh

How??? Why??? But Loki isn’t evil!!! Well, maybe THIS version is I guess…

Oh hey Mjolnir

Wait what’s in the jar?? IS THAT FROG THOR? THROG?? OH MY GOSH IT IS

Bruh they all have glorious purposes

Loki don’t be a simp

Mall Santa throne

Miss minutes is back

Miss minutes is sus

I still don’t trust Ravonna

Called it

Treacherous biotch

She’s behind it I know it. Working for her BF Kang

She’s behind it bruh I know

Just one good memory?? AGHHHHHH MY BELOVED

She pruned herself!!!

SYLVIE MY BELOVED

Lmaooooo black Loki liar

Haha alligator Loki ate the neighbors cat

Bruh I’m getting major Paradigm vibes (you need to check out that game if you haven’t)

“But blades are worthless in face of a Loki sorcery” at least THIS man gets it

He missed his brother and of course the TVA goes “hahaha no you’re not allowed.”

God of Outcasts is better than the Loser Club don’t @ me

Sooo whats black Lokis past then? And what about more of kids Loki?

Lmao sounds terrifying as a woman Loki

Please don’t make Sylvie the crutch to save the day. Let tom hiddleston be the hero please

They’re gonna laugh at his plan

Called it

OH EVEN MORE LOKIS HOW LOVELY

PRESIDENT LOKI

Oh hey Sylvie

You in a nest?

Oh my

Girl you better run

Hahahahaha uh oh

Oh my! She’s sending stuff

MOBIUS OH MY GOSH YES

I’m calling it now it’s him

YES YES YES YES YES

HELL YEA MY GUY

Two tom Hiddleston’s

So how did he get an army

Lmao

The chaos is palpable

OH??????

WHAT

ALLIGATOR LOKI BIT OFF PRESIDENT LOKIS HAND AND THEN HE SCREAMED LIKE A LITTLE GIRL

I’m not so happy about the way that ended. At least not with the girlish scream from president Loki… seemed wildly out of character.

I’m so confused

I have no idea how to feel

Lmao TVA Loki is so damn confused and over everything

Alligator Loki didn’t betray you!! He’s a good boy!

How do you know it’s a death sentence??? Huh??? Maybe it’s the answer!

Sooo does every single pruned person ever get sent here or his mobius also a Loki?

HAHAHA I CALLED IT! ALIOTH IS THE ANSWER.

Cannibals huh? Lovely

Hold on guys it’s Lokis love

“Is he a coward or is he being brave?” “Not too sure.” Same

REUNION BABY

Us as an alligator

Stop bickering

Please please please give Loki a good moment. Let him be badass please for God’s sake

What happened to the hunter from the last episode?

Oh here we are

Please they better not hurt her

I know she wasn’t trustworthy. Gosh I hate Renslayer.

She’s still tryna protect whoever gave her power. Renslayer I will revel in your defeat.

Man I’ve missed mobius

Mobius cares about Loki!!! Even Sylvie knows!

Wdym it’s cold? Homie your a frost giant

LOKI CAN CONJURE BLANKIES. New fanfic idea oh heck yea.

Lmao oh great they’re in denial about feelings

Awkward teens in love

You have Loki!

Oh gosh the awkward tension!

AWWWWW HE SHARED THE BLANKET

It’s like watching two awkward teenagers on their first date ever in their lives.

Yea loki but you were also betrayed by your father and home sooooo

Loki. You know you can be happy without ruling.

Together.

Oh my gosh my heart is loving the awkwardness

What the freak are those bird like things

Still better than the devils anus

I need Sylvie to teach Loki how to enchant

He’s sticking beside her

FLAME SWORD HELL YEA

Conjured a hilt. Can you please conjure a badass asgardian outfit too?

Burn it to the ground.

OH MY GOSH I KOVE THEM ALL

Hug

Hug

Hug

Please

YESSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HE CALLED MOBIUS A FRIEND

Mobius how dare you call Sylvie your favorite

Tom you will always be my favorite

Reminds me kind of Dormamu

The skull in alioth looks like a wolf skull

Loki if you get yourself killed I’ll never forgive you

Is this where he does the come and get me?

CALLED IT

Flame sword babyyyy

What’s going to work? Teeeeaaaamwork

LOKI TEAM UP

HOLY CRAP THAT LOKI IS POWERFUL

HOMIE RECREATED ASGARD

HOLY CRAP

ENCHANT TOGETHER YESSS

OH MY GOSH

THIS IS SO COOL

Cmon Loki you can do it!!

Save old Loki cmon!

YESSSSSSAAAA

SAVE HIM PLEASE

Please

Pease

Please

Glorious purpose

Don’t die please

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

No….. MARVEL STOP KILLING OUR LOKIS FOR GOD SAKE

They did it! But old Loki is gone… and I’m sad…

Where’s kid Loki and gator Loki?

Are we not gonna see black Loki again? I was excited for him

Don’t you dare go to credits

YOU SONNUVA

At least it ended on a happier note this time…

But I miss old Loki already… please tell me he’s not dead… but I suppose since pruning already doesn’t kill them, it’d be cheap to have Alioth also not kill them..

Rest In Peace old Loki. You died with honor in battle… you will be in Valhalla. I know it.

I heard the Kablooie gum was a reference to Calvin and Hobbes and lemme just say that is the best thing ever

Dang no end credit or mid credit scene

Wow this was a crazy episode. Some parts I loved, some parts I was very much not happy with. Mostly the scene with president Loki. I hoped that would be much longer and that it would play more into the overall story, not just a throwaway scene to reference a comic and have a quick laugh. I’m fine with alligator Loki biting off that Loki’s hand, but not with the childish scream afterwards… that felt very out of character.

Can’t wait for the final episode!!! Nothing better happen to Loki or Sylvie. I hope we get to see the other Lokis again. I also want to know more about kid Loki and black Loki. Why did kid Loki kill Thor and how? What’s up with black Loki and what was his nexus event? We didn’t even get to learn about his hammer. I’m fine with not learning about alligator Loki. It’s fine to have that be a fun mystery imo. It was funny seeing throg very briefly too. But I have too many questions that I know won’t be answered in only one more episode which is disappointing. Maybe we can learn more in the supposedly confirmed season two? I hope so. I’m really curious about how they are going to wrap things up and what the fates of everyone will be. I hope this isn’t an isolated event that doesn’t tie into phase four at all. I really want Loki in Multiverse of Madness. Not just Sylvie although idk if we can get both of them in, but I don’t want this show to be Sophia Di Martino’s only appearance in the MCU.

I trust tom Hiddleston but I know marvel doesn’t always allow him to shine through as much as he could. I’m so hopeful for this show but my anxiety is also skyrocketing.

[cyncity2000]

73 questions tag! tysm @goodlesson , can’t say i’ve ever had anything like this before but hey it’s not like I have anything better to do rn 😅 

answers under the cut! i tag @rene-royale @teenager-confused-tired @sawafilmtoday @onedoesnotsimplystormthebastille if you feel like it, but no pressure bc this is a LOT and took me a couple days to finish lol

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? um. could be worse, could be better?? so 5. 

describe yourself in a hashtag? no. twitter and all its shitty hashtags can go to hell.

if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? weird question. nobody?? i wouldn’t want to??

if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? not to be all dan smith on main but like...’come to this please’

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? uhhhh idk. i’m very open about most aspects of my personality i’d say

what’s your wake up ritual? stay in bed as long as possible and then YEET at maximum speed so i don’t waste the day

what’s your go to bed ritual? tell myself i should go to bed. pick up my phone instead. regret it in the morning.

what’s your favorite time of day? 2pm or 9-10pm 

your go to for having a good laugh? macdoesit or drawfee videos on youtube. truly the best.

dream country to visit? i wanna go back to england and france, also i’d love to visit literally anywhere i could

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? falling in love with my college roommate probably,, didn’t see THAT coming

heels or flats/sneakers? bitch i’m 5′10″ with size 12.5 feet. converse.

vintage or new? vintage looks cool. i am not cool. so new.

who do you want to write your obituary? idk man i don’t wanna think about that now???

style icon? if you knew me irl you’d know style is not a word in my vocabulary

what are three things you cannot live without? my cat, my friends/gf, and my cd collection 

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? i do not bake or cook, the real world is going to kill me immediately

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? i’d be too stressed to make food for people but i’d love to like. go OUT for dinner with...dodie, dallon weekes, and pj liguori. they’re all just cool people i follow and i wanna know what they’re LIKE. 

what’s your biggest fear in life? failure due to lack of confidence, motivation and direction in life :)))

window or aisle seat? i’d say window but i am long boi so aisle is usually nicer unless i trip someone by accident

what’s your current tv obsession? still supernatural, also brooklyn 99

favorite app? tumblr :D

secret talent? despite my crippling procrastination issues i’ve almost always been a straight-A student 🤷‍♀️

most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? drove myself two hours to a concert in february, or maybe the time i did a really hard ropes course or went to the badlands?

how would you define yourself in three words? introverted, distracted, nerdy

favorite piece of clothing you own? maybe my waterparks sweatshirt bc i had a dream last night that i donated it and then went back to the store to buy it back lmao so subconsciously i must really like it

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? you gotta have that one pair of black jeans that goes with anything imo

a superpower you would want? flying. it’s the only recurring dream i’ve ever had and it’s my only answer ever

what’s inspiring you in life right now? all the people doing big or little things to help. the ones doing instagram lives or sending money or supplies to people in need or just giving me more faith in humanity

best piece of advice you’ve received? can’t remember any. why doesn’t anyone give me good advice

best advice you’d give your teenage self? do your laundry on time. don’t wear...whatever that was to school. just wash ur fuckin clothes. also don’t let it bother you that you’re single the whole time. you’ll get there.

a book everyone should read? they both die at the end by adam silvera. you WILL cry. but you will love it. 

what would you like to be remembered for? i have no idea. being a non-shitty person at least.

how do you define beauty? happiness.

what do you love most about your body? idk being tall is kinda nice

best way to take a rest/decompress? get a blanket. comfy clothes. my cat. put headphones on. put some music on or watch youtube.

favorite place to view art? on tumblr and instagram! i follow soo many wonderful artists it’s great

if your life was a song, what would the title be? Oh No (What Is She Doing Now?)

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? piano or guitar. i suck at both and if i could be good at ONE i’d be happy

if you had a tattoo, where would it be? been thinking about this tbh. somewhere on my arm definitely but idk where D:

dolphins or koalas? dolphins!!

what’s your spirit animal? a cat?

best gift you’ve ever received? for christmas my sister bought me a cute lil box meant for displaying concert tickets and it was the most thoughtful thing ever. also the AMAZING studio headphones i’m currently using that my mom got me like three years ago for christmas

best gift you’ve given? probably when i bought me and my best friend tickets to see the Sherlock S4 finale in a movie theater 

what’s your favorite board game? cards against humanity, one night ultimate werewolf/alien, settlers of catan

what’s your favorite color? porpleee 💜

least favorite color? hmm they’re all valid except for like. puke green.

diamond or pearls? neither lol

drugstore makeup or designer? neither 😜

blow-dry or air-dry? blow-dry but i never do bc it takes y e a r s

pilates or yoga? yoga!

coffee or tea? both but only hot tea or frozen coffee 

what’s the weirdest word in the english language? thanks to tumblr the word ‘defenestrate’ has entered my vocabulary and I do not regret it

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? either. chocolate is chocolate 🍫

stairs or elevators? tbh stairs, i’m just a lazy bitch

summer or winter? winter. cold > hot

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? i’d still get tired of it :( i need that variety!!

a dessert you don’t like? none. dessert is dessert and it is all valid if i can eat it

a skill you’re working on mastering? writing, working from home, playing the guitar

best thing to happen to you today? currently watching mike gross play old brobecks tunes :’) he also just saw my comment yay

worst thing to happen to you today? i had cheesecake for lunch. sounds good but it’s the only thing i’ve had today besides a piece of chocolate and my body is Not Happy

best compliment you’ve ever received? someone on fanfiction dot net once left me a comment saying they’d almost cried at my story and called me “a true writer” and it’s honestly one of the only thing that keeps me writing...i’m still mad they weren’t signed in so I’ll never be able to thank them for it.

favorite smell? lemon, cookies, fresh-cut grass

hugs or kisses? hugs!!

if you made a documentary, would it be about? somethin gay probably

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? honestly...probably “who the fuck is keith” fjadskljfd

lipstick or lipgloss? like peyton said chapstick is the only valid answer

sweet or savory? depends how i’m feelin, love both

girl crush? besides the obvious one (my girlfriend), honestly not many? there’s this one girl i follow on insta who’s big in the panic! fandom and jESUS SHE’S SO PRETTY. also the girl who plays kaia in supernatural is CUUUTE

how do you know you’re in love? has only happened to me once but for me...i already loved her platonically for months and then suddenly one day i was like oh. why am i getting the urge to kiss you rn. oh no.

a song you can listen to on repeat? anything by idkhow or bastille. never gets old.

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? not to copy peyton but i would love to know what goes on inside my cat’s head

what are you most excited for about this time in your life? next semester of college!! i got into a super-competitive dorm and i’m gonna have my own room and live with nine other people and gahh i’m just so excited to be chaotic with all my friends again and meet new people :’)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #258

“as above, so below, what you reap is what you sow. what you give comes back threefold, as above, so below.”

Who was your favorite cartoon character when you were a kid? Pikachu! Have you ever asked a guy out on a date? No. Who do you consider your best friend in your workplace? N/A Do you have to have your bed or anything else in your room a specific way before you go to sleep? I think I almost always have to be facing the left, but I can't really say with total certainty considering you don't really like... *realize* when you fall asleep. Have you changed your mind about anything lately? I've been on the fence about things. What do you dream about most? What is the general tone or mood of your dreams? They're either uncomfortable, melancholic run-ins with Jason or horrible nightmares about being attacked in some way and being incapable of fighting back. Do you mind going grocery shopping or is it something you enjoy? Does ANYBODY enjoy it?? If you could have a physical feature like wings, horns, a tail, ect., what would you have? GIVE ME RAM HORNS. What is something you wish more people understood about who you are as a person? A lot of my struggling goes on in my head. Like I think I'm relatively open about when I'm having a hard time, but it's come to my attention recently that there's a lot of battles people don't see and leads to the belief I give up easily. Have you ever gone through a time when you had no friends? How did you deal with it? No friends I ever hung out with or anything, yes. I just had to start reaching out and opening up a bit more, and that's when Colleen came in. What is your favorite food to have as a snack? It depends on what flavor I'm craving. Usually though, something sour and gummy. What time do you usually eat dinner? That can vary from as early as 5:30 to as late as like, 8:00. When was the last time you felt extremely happy? Like about a week ago, the second night Mom slept on the pull-out bed a family friend got us versus that damn couch she's slept on for years. Her doing it a second time was like, verification that she was more comfortable and would keep doing it, which she has. Has any food ever made you sick to the point where you’d be afraid to try it again? No, thankfully. What is something you wish you had the opportunity to do more often? Get out of the house. Do you have any interests or hobbies you thought you would outgrow, but haven’t? I wasn't sure if I would ever "outgrow" RP. Apparently I won't. Is there an outfit that you wear much more frequently than any other? There are a few shirts, yeah. How old is your television? We got it when my parents were still together, so it's old. Do you have a laptop or desktop? A laptop. Do you own any television series box sets? Just Meerkat Manor. Have you ever been in a fight with your best friend? Yeah. Was the last movie you watched a horror film? No. Where is your favorite place to go when you’re depressed? On a car ride where I can blast my music. In high school, were you in trouble a lot? No. I only ever got in trouble for too many tardies in the morning. Do you enjoy your hairstyle? Yeah. Do you have weak upper body strength? Yikes yes. Do you think hugs are awkward? Not if they're friends or similar. People I don't like and/or know well but am expected to hug anyway, yes, it's uncomfortable. Story of my life with my sister's in-laws. Do you think facial hair is gross? ... No...? I mean sure, if it's not groomed it can be, but it's very natural and normal? Would you ever dye your hair an unnatural color? UGH I want to. My hair has such a hard time holding color... Has anyone ever been weirdly obsessed with you? No. What is your favorite band of all time? Ozzy Osbourne. Always. Would you consider getting a tattoo any time soon? Literally ASAP. I was supposed to get my Mark one tidied up big big time for my birthday by a really professional artist with both holiday and birthday money, but Mom literally had to use it to keep this house and the car. It was admittedly frustrating, but I could tell she was far from happy about it and I can't *rightfully* be pissy about it. Then the cancer came along and threw a massive wrench in the plan, so now idk when that's happening now. What movie did you last watch with someone? I THINK it was the live action The Lion King with Dad. It's been a long time. Are you afraid of airplane rides? Not very actively, no. I acknowledge the risk, but it's not something I deeply worry about. If you’re reading a book, what page are you currently on? Don't have a book to read currently; I just finished the second Wings of Fire book, now I'm moving onto The Testaments by Margaret Atwood when we can order it over Amazon. Do you have a job you like? I don't have a job period. Have you ever lived with a roommate before? Yeah. How many scarves do you own, if any at all? Maybe one? If even that. Did you tell your last girlfriend/boyfriend that you love them? Yeah. What was the last thing your parents got mad at you for? Idk about Dad, but Mom... probably something I said? But I'm not sure. Do your pets have favorites? I'm the only one who handles Venus, and I'm Roman's favorite. How many people could sleep comfortably in the room you’re in? Just two if we share the bed. Would you like to have a treadmill in your house? I DESPERATELY want one. My legs are getting bad again now that I haven't physically been in school for what, a month? What’s the longest you’ve ever liked someone without telling them? Well, that would be Girt, but I went on-and-off with like-liking him for years... Since freshman year, really. It's hard to say because of my mind constantly changing. When is the last time you were on a swingset? Wow, no clue. At sleepovers, do you usually sleep on a bed, couch or floor? I haven't had one of those in too long of a time to really tell you. It would depend on the relationship, too. What’s the sweetest thing a gf/bf can do to get you to forgive them? Changed behavior. How hot does the temperature get in the summer where you live? High 90s/lower 100s. Was the last hoodie you wore too big for you? No. Did it belong to someone else? No. Have you ever taken Ambien to fall asleep? I was given it at the hospital, but it never did much for me. Did your last ex try to get back together with you after the break-up? No. Do you know someone who has 6 or more siblings? Possibly, but I don't think so. Do you rent movies frequently? Nope. What is your favorite thing to do outside? Take pictures. Will we ultimately end up destroying our own race? Yup. How do you think the world will end? Human life, climate change. Earth itself, probably like a meteor or black hole or something. I believe the universe itself will always exist. An alien ship lands at your house, and they want you. Do you go with them? Errrr no. If I even had the option. What’s your favorite meal to cook? I don't cook. Homework: Do you actually READ the chapters, or just skim through them? I read. I'd be too nervous about missing vital info to skim. If you were in a horror flick, would you be one of the first ones to die? Probably, but it depends on the predicament, I guess? What movie has been taken WAY too far, as far as sequels go? I don't know. I'm not a film buff. Do you refuse to eat certain foods because of what they look like? Yep. Green olives, for example, look so fuckin gross to me. Would you ever become a fan of a team you hate to please your spouse? No? Can you handle scary movies? I love scary movies. I enjoy the adrenaline of 'em. How often do you get a new purse…and for guys a new wallet? Not often at all. What is the most money that you have ever spent on getting your nails done? Never done that. Do you have a fake I.D.? Nope. Would you date someone 5 years older than you? Yeah. Have you ever been fingered? Yes. What is your favorite horror movie? Hmmm. I've got a bias towards Silent Hill, of course, but I also really enjoy both The Blair Witch Project movies, as well as The Crazies. Has a little kid ever fallen asleep on your lap before? Yeah. What’s your favorite kind of float? (coke, root beer) I can't remember the last time I had one of those. If you heard your best friend’s significant other was cheating on them, would you tell them? Even if you couldn’t prove it? UM yes. I mean it kinda depends on who told me this, like it could be total bullshit, but, they'd deserve to know that there was a possibility. If you discovered you were pregnant at this point in time, would you keep it or abort it? Why? If I got pregnant now, it'd have to be a case of rape, in which case I would probably abort, considering I'd be fucking traumatized worse than I already was. What is the last thing you googled? Uhhh shit. I think the definition for a word to ensure I was using it correctly? Have you ever jumped off a high dive into a pool? Nooo. I always wanted to as a kid, but I was ultimately too scared. Do you like hot, cold, or lukewarm showers? Hot, usually. Do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? Yes. Where did your mother and father meet for the first time? I think work. Have you ever stayed in a cheap motel? No. I'm too much of a germaphobe for that. Have you been to Mount Rushmore? No. Do you sleep with the door open, kinda open, or completely closed? Open or kinda open, depending on if the cat moves it or not. How old were you when you got chicken pox? Never got it. What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual. Do you have full or thinner lips? Uh idk, they look pretty normal to me. Which of the Pirates of the Caribbean's was your favorite? Never watched 'em. Do you press the delete key or the backspace key to get rid of a mistake? Backspace. How far do you live from your parents? I live with one. How many family photos do you have in your home? Like, on display/the walls? A pretty decent amount. Are you happy with how much money you make? I make none, so like... guess. Are you the type of person that will parallel park? Fuck that. To you, what is “the best thing since sliced bread”? Probably the Internet. Do you read and believe your horoscope? No. Do you have rules for naming your future children? I'm not having kids, but if I was to, no. Which actor, in your opinion, played the best Batman? I haven't seen them all. Have you ever TURNED DOWN an invite to a wedding? Why? No. Do you believe people should get married in a church? lol get married wherever the fuck you want. Name a movie everyone else thought was funny, but you couldn’t stand: *shrugs* Does the mall you go to have an arcade? Do you go in there? No. What is your favorite Little Debbie snack? This is ACTUALLY impossible. Don't ask me this question lmao. Got any interesting wigs? I don't have any wigs. What Mario game was your least favorite, and why? I've literally only ever played Mario Kart. I'm not that interested in the games. Have you ever been snowed in? Not to where like, we couldn't go outside. Does playing games in 2-D bother you because you now play mostly 3-D games? Oh no. Graphics absolutely do not make a game. Sure, they're more desirable considering it greatly improves immersion, but still. Sometimes 2D fits the "vibe" of the game. Tell the weirdest name of a town/city you’ve ever heard: Conetoe. You're pronouncing it wrong. Do you know anyone who DOESN’T have a cell phone? I don't think so. Do you like pineapple? Oh yeah. Do you get a flu jab each year? No, but I should start. Did you ever dream about being an animal? Maybe? Idk. What's your favourite colour on a dog? Orange/red. Do you have an electric or gas cooker? Gas. What do you like to drink at a restaurant? I usually get a soda. If we're at some fancy place for once, I'll usually get some light, fruity alcohol. What was the last book you read that also is a film? I don't have a clue. Have you always known what you've wanted to do with your life, career-wise? It's changed many, many times now. Would you stay at a haunted hotel? Hell yeah. What is the best HAND-MADE present you've ever received? It was this long, extremely sweet letter my mom wrote for my b-day two years back. It meant a lot to me. Have you ever gotten pizza delivered to your house that you didn't order? I don't believe so. Do you follow a 5-second rule after dropping food on the floor? NOOOOOOOOO sir. Did you take Flintstone vitamins or any others as a child? EW, no. We were lucky enough to have fruity chewy ones, not chalky crap. What types of things do you think the government is hiding from us? Oh my fucking god, a universe of information. Aliens probably being one of the least scary things. How do you like your soda: I think it tastes best cold from a can. Have you learned anything valuable today? No. What's your favorite kind of Doritos? Cool Ranch. Do your parents have MySpace pages? Mom has a Facebook. Be honest...ever peed in the pool? Noooo. When I was a kid, you went behind the pool and handled that. Have you ever pulled a fire alarm? Nope. Have you had your tonsils removed? No. Isn't Chef Boyardee awesome? Not a fan. What reality show has been taken WAY too far? I don't watch enough TV for this. Must you grab a souvenir from almost everywhere you go? Nah, not always. Did you enjoy making things out of Play-Doh as a child? I did. What do you put on hot dogs? Mustard and ketchup. Can you swim? Yeah. Hot dogs or cheeseburgers? Cheeseburgers. Your favorite hobby? Taking pictures, particularly of animals. Do you wear glasses? Yes. Do you have a phobia? Plenty. Can you drive a stick? Never tried. How many TVs are in your house? Two. Do you like to sing? Not very long. Favorite car? Idc. Is there anything (out of the obvious) that makes you feel really ill? Perhaps, but I'm not certain. Maybe some smell. WELL WAIT, gasoline can give me a real headache, but I don't feel like, REALLY sick. Do you know both of your biological parents? Which one do you prefer? Yes, and I don't want to choose between them. When was the last time you wrote so much your finger ached? My final exam for Writing last semester. What is something you think about yourself that nobody agrees with? Quite honestly, I wouldn't put extreme emphasis on my loyalty, but only because if you prove to me that you're undeserving of my friendship, trust, or anything like that, peace. I'm out. Family, friend, whatever; I don't care. Yet most people who know me have pointed out I'm extremely loyal, but really in all cases I can think of, I remained loyal because the person was worthy of it. What about something people think of you that you don’t agree with? This depends on the person and situation of course, but mostly, that I put on a damn good front of not being a socially anxious mess. Teachers and friends have pointed that out quite a bit, but I could NOT disagree more. I think I do awfully. What design is on your calendar this year? I don't have a current one. What is your favorite type of video game? Horror. What’s the weather like where you live? (All year round, not today) The baseline is IT'S HOT. Even our winters are - usually - very mild. Summer usually soaks the shit out of us; afternoon storms are literally an almost daily occurrence, so as you can imagine, the humidity could kill a man. The weather in general is very unpredictable year-round. When was the last time you climbed a tree? I've never actually properly done so. I grew up with almost exclusively pine trees, which only have branches much too high to climb.

[nnq]

modern!au k(lance)

they're all in their 20's except for Shiro who's 30 and coran who's 50

first of all. miss me with that 'pining roommate' shit. I love miscommunication and making characters that r sexy bffs with one another

Lance meets Nyma through a Craigslist ad he put up saying he needed a roommate. the moment they met was a tragedy for everyone but them because they're that powerful and beautiful

lance with tousled hair, wearing a half-unbuttoned silk shirt and designer jeans, Michael kors sunglasses pushed up atop his head, arm wrapped around nyma: hi guys this is my roommate, nyma!

nyma, with her blonde 3-ft long box braids down her back, perfectly manicured red nails, bodycon dress and loubitons, hand on lances waist: hey

allura, shaking and on the verge of tears: STOP MAKING US LOOK POOR AND UGLY

Lance is in school for marine biology and Nyma works as a hairdresser and the both of them are small beauty gurus on YouTube that collab with one another

lance: hey guys we're going to be trying out the new anastasia pallete we got today :)!

nyma: and by got we mean shoplifted from sephora

lance: NYMA YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT

they're also insta baddies and both gender non-conforming baddies. Nyma is a nonbinary lesbian icon and lance is a nonbinary bicon.... those are like the fucking BEST senses of style

anyone with eyes can see that nyma is into and ONLY into girls but of course... heteronormativity.

rolo: I still don't get why you're dating lance. he's super annoying.

nyma: he doesn't bitch nearly as much as you even when he's got my cock in his ass

they do this thing where when people assume they're a couple they pretend they're some kind of kink couple and freak everyone out

which is why when hunk and pidge meet nyma they're like :eyes: but when nyma flirts with pidge lance doesn't even bat an eye and then lance starts pining about Keith's greasy mullet and his bags under his eyes and nymas got this look on her face that perfectly resembles a man who's lost all sense of normalcy and righteousness in his life and now sits in a bar every night listening to this dumb romance novel type shit and then pidge and hunk are like. oh. no they're just gay.

speaking of keith. he's one of those gays. one of the quirky emo gays that never sleeps and listens to 'coffee and cigarettes' on repeat and has like 3 strings of lights in his room and not only is an art major but ALSO a photographer. and yet somehow he still has the will to wake up at 5 am every morning and go to the gym like some kind of HEATHEN.

Lance knew Keith in high school for 3 years until he got expelled for fighting at the end of his junior year. He was also universally crushed on and was the bad boy jock of the school with a heart of gold so naturally Lance pretended to despise him so he could pine for him in peace

that all goes down the drain when Lance recognizes Keith in one of his classes and goes through the five stages of grief because a) he's hot and b) Lance is openly bi now so he doesn't have an escuse to not tolerate him

(He wasn't gonna do anything about it until he was put in a group with Keith a few weeks into class and he off handedly mentioned he went to Keiths high school, and Keith claimed he didn't remember him, and Lance was just a tad bit upset but was gonna leave it at that except after like 5 days of working together Keith slams his fists into the table and is like 'HOLY FUCK LANCE MCCLAIN?' And Lance is like. w. What.)

turns out Keith does remember lance. very vividly, actually. because he was the guy that everyone kind of had a crush on because he was so nice and charming to everyone he met, and Keith was SO gone for him. he just didn't recognize him tbh, which makes sense, bcuz in high school lance wore blue contacts and had straight hair and now he just wears glasses occasionally and leaves his hair wavy. Keith is gay and stupid don't blame him

keith, bursting into Shiro and Adams apartment at 2 pm: SHIRO HOLY FUCK

adam, bags under his eyes, underneath the covers of him and shiros bed: good fucking god not again

I'm tired of talking about ppl other than Lance and nyma though so I'm gonna talk about them for a bit because im love

as I said Lance has wavy hair and his actual eye color is brown but as he was growing up he was hella insecure about it that's why he wore blue contacts.... nyma caught him once trying to put them on again and put an end to All That Real Quick

nyma has brown eyes too and they're super dark, almost black, and that shits breathtaking bro. she usually has her real hair dyed blonde all the time and permed but she also likes to wear wigs and get braids too because she knows she looks damn good in them. everyone is jealous.

lance has tons of super light freckles. Enough said. nyma has a birthmark on her hip that's kind of shaped like a horse if you look at it from the right way

lance: you were a horse girl as a kid weren't u

nyma: how fucking dare. how fucking dare you say that. I really do have to laugh.......

nyma: obviously I was a warrior cats stan

lance's sense of fashion ranges from 'i went to California for a week once and now I can't stop wearing sweatpants and slides' to 'It's surprising I haven't gotten robbed at this point'. Lance is a scholarship baby so all the money he saved up through countless jobs and the one he already has at a coffee shop almost exclusively goes to clothes and kombucha

Nymas sense of style is definitely more on the eccentric side but since she looks good in EVERYTHING she gets away with it. think dollskill but with more neon colors and designer. she's the kind of person that never wears the same shade of lipstick for a whole month and has a box full of makeup palletes that are almost untouched and everyone who has seen it is both jealous and in wonder FENTYWAYS...

Keith goes over to lance's apartment for a project of sorts and immediately assumes that Lance and Nyma are a thing (they're very platonically affectionate, Nyma will kiss lance's cheek and they cuddle sometimes) which is disappointing but it's not a surprise considering Lance is so Lance and everyone else acts like they are dating so that must be the case, right?

lmao you thought.

nyma: holy shit. holy Fuck. God, allura is so hot. I would probably die if she brushed past me. I would die happily knowing I've been blessed by the touch of an angel.

lance: yeah haha she's really pretty.

keith, struggling to not choke on his coffee hearing All This at 9:31 A.M. in starbucks:

Keith asks if he can take photos of the two of them for his photography insta and they both jump on it so they can flex being sexy and afterwards Lance thanks him with a kiss on the cheek and Keith is sent REELING into gay mayhem.

lance: do you think that was like..... too much.

nyma: i think men are dumb that's what.

I mean u can't really blame Keith because Lance and Nyma are constantly joke-flirting with one another on social media and are in almost every one of the others photos in some way, or at least tagged, so by the time Keith actually works up the nerve to ask about that, it's been WEEKS since Lance kissed him and he's been miserably failing to ignore it

keith: so.... how's nyma doing?

lance: she's good! She's spent all day dying one of her wigs so she went for a coffee run lol. probably will hang with allura and shay later too

keith: and.... that doesn't make you jealous?

lance: LOL no.... they could never compete with me (talking about being Nyma's best friend)

keith: oh.... well, it's good that you trust each other a lot in your relationship.... you seem like a really good boyfriend

lance: wat the fuck did you just say.

as soon as lance explains that nyma is not his gf and they're just bffs Keith is like ohthankgod.jpg and almost accidentally asks lance on a date before he stops himself and is like.... dumb gay bitch calm DOOOWWWNN

after that it becomes very obvious that nyma and lance r just friends at least for Keith mostly through dumb shit they say to one another

lance, sitting with hunk, pidge, and Keith at the library: hey guys wanna see something cool.

pidge: go for it

lance, clearing his throat: she think she bad but I'm better, these bitches tryna play catch up-

nyma, coming out of nowhere: SHUT THE FUCK UP WHEN I'M TALKING LIL BITCH, PUT YO HEAD DOWN WHEN YOU TALK TO A PIMP-

Nyma and Lance have self-care nights every Friday, sometimes Allura or Shay will come, and very RARELY Keith if only to spend time with Lance. also? Allura and Shay are dating, die mad about it.

They do waxing, exfoliation, mud masks, moisturizing treatments, hair masks, painting nails.... need I go on. it's basically whatever they want to do that week and when Keith reluctantly agrees to participate one day Lance goes mental

lance: OK so here's what I'm thinking. it's obvious you haven't really had a self care day for a while, which is like, fine, you do you, but holy shit are your split ends bad. I was thinking maybe I could trim them and then we could do a hair mask? Oh! A face mask would be good as well, even though you've practically got perfect skin. I'd offer to wax but for first timers the pain is a bitch to handle on the face. I'm not sure if you'd be an acrylic kind of guy but I have some black nail polish that I could put on- wow, your hands are really big compared to mine, and they're so soft, haha, isn't that crazy? so what do you think?

keith, still reeling from the fact that lance is going to touch his hair, face, and hands in the next several hours: uh......yeah..... sounds great.

nyma, sitting on lance's bed in nothing but a bra and sweatpants, smoking a blunt and readjusting her sheet mask: *long exhale* christ

Shay got Lance into the whole healthy organic food thing and in turn he got Nyma into it so they're both the bitches who drink nothing but Fiji water and almond milk and will offer you a plate of sliced cucumbers and tomatoes as a snack. we Stan a vegan couple.

keith: these are actually really good.

nyma: we usually put them on our eyes, but go off I guess.

keith:

nyma: nah I'm just fucking with you, we have different cucumbers for that

by the end of the night Keith feels like he's been cleaned by a car wash and he's dizzy from all of lance's thoughtless affection and when lance says he can stay the night because it's already late, Keith mindlessly blurts out 'only if it's with you' and nymas like.... um. Wig.

keith, laying stiff as a board on one side of lance's bed: uh

lance: oh my God you gay bitch get over here and spoon me. also kiss me on the fucking lips bro.

Nyma owns a cat named Beezer that she stole from her old roommate (rolo) but calls her beebo because quote 'beezer is so fucking lame bro i hate men'. Lance owns a Russian blue mix called, you guessed it, Blue, that he found stuck in his apartments basement only a few days after moving in. Nyma and Lance are WEAK

lance: ohhhhh look at my pretty baby sitting on the table all cute and relaxed!!! look at that baby!!! fantastic stuff!

nyma, putting her head on beebos belly: You Are So Soft And So Chubby I Would Die For You

pidge would also die for the both of them

OK I'm tired and uninspired so I'll stop here but I MAY ADD MORE LATER

[punkscowardschampions]

Ronnie & Joe

Ronnie: where the fuck mckenna Joe: stuck at this thing Ronnie: like i fucking said Ronnie: where Joe: oh Joe: this kid from my course was doing open mic so we all had to show up Ronnie: youve done youre time then yeah Joe: overtime Joe: i wanna be home bad Ronnie: leave Ronnie: whats keeping you there Joe: them Joe: you know how people are Joe: buying me more drinks Ronnie: fuck em Ronnie: down whatever youre on & fuck off Joe: i will Joe: i am Joe: you picked up or am i Ronnie: its on you Ronnie: for the radio silence Joe: come on baby Joe: can't hear myself in here nevermind my phone Ronnie: not your fucking baby Joe: don't be like that Ronnie: i dont only exist when its quiet in your head Ronnie: thank fuck Joe: no one does then Joe: that's the whole point ain't it Ronnie: the point is where the fuck have you been Joe: i told you ron Joe: if i didnt have to i wouldn't be gone from you Ronnie: if you werent a pussy you wouldnt have to do fuck all Ronnie: grow a pair for christs sake Ronnie: baby is fucking right Joe: ive got to go out sometime Joe: if i didn't show to uni i couldn't afford half the shit we cop Ronnie: you aint at classes Ronnie: so unless some bitch off it is paying you to escort i call bullshit Joe: sadly not Joe: see if any of 'em are game maybe Ronnie: with 1 foot out the door Ronnie: you wish Ronnie: no fucking game when youre trying to play fuck all except cello Joe: 💘 for my cello skills Ronnie: youve got groupies Ronnie: go cry to em like Joe: you're sick of me, yeah Ronnie: work it out cunt Joe: we don't need to play games Ronnie: goin from baby to middle fucking aged aint cute Joe: you've got it covered for the both of us Ronnie: fuck you Joe: now I can't call you cute Ronnie: you cant call me old shithead Joe: i weren't idiot Joe: come on Joe: it'll all be good when i get there Ronnie: you come on Ronnie: I could be fucking dead Joe: you aren't Joe: don't say that Ronnie: no thanks to you Ronnie: or fucks given by you Joe: stop it Joe: you're the only person i care about Joe: literally Joe: not even myself Ronnie: & this is how you show it yeah Joe: i'm shit Joe: i know it but i never told you no different Ronnie: get another drink bought for you mckenna Ronnie: drown in it Joe: we got better plans Joe: and methods Ronnie: stop pissing about then Joe: will you be my baby again Ronnie: not that easy Joe: what if i get you something special Ronnie: do it & find out Ronnie: why the fuck would i commit to a yeah for a maybe Joe: 'cos you know i'm gonna Ronnie: your word is for shit Ronnie: i know that Joe: fine Joe: i'll stop talking Ronnie: promises promises baby Joe: 😶 Ronnie: left yet Joe: just me and my two feet Joe: no promises Ronnie: if you aint & youre silent on me to talk to some other bitch you wont be walking anywhere Ronnie: thats a fucking promise like Joe: if you were trying to get me to go faster Joe: why would i wanna talk to anyone else Ronnie: why else go out with those doss cunts Joe: part of it is keeping 'em thinking i'm normal Joe: can't just show up and nod out Ronnie: youre the only 1 with your ma on speed dial Ronnie: who fucking cares Joe: means i don't need to go back don't it Joe: or would you rather i was in dublin every other weekend Joe: i do what i gotta for a reason you know that Ronnie: theres fuck all need to have that many playmates Ronnie: if you planned that it was to piss me off Joe: i wouldn't need to plan that Ronnie: fuck you Joe: and i didn't Joe: they're boring Ronnie: 💔 Joe: i am Joe: i miss you Ronnie: you dont Joe: yeah i fucking do Ronnie: you fucking dont Joe: how do you want me to prove it Joe: tell me Ronnie: i aint spoonfeeding you ever day of your fucking life Ronnie: not that bitch Joe: you want it you ask for it Ronnie: you wanna prove yourself do it Joe: i will Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: picked a boss day for romance Joe: have i Joe: i'm always romantic Ronnie: dont you know what day it is Joe: oh Joe: lol yeah Joe: i'll get you garage flowers instead Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: theyll die quicker than you Joe: picky Joe: put the rig to another use after then Joe: 🥀 v classic Ronnie: ill carve it into my arm as you like it so much Ronnie: cheers for the easy design Joe: you could wait 'til I'm there Joe: so mean, baby Ronnie: course you wanna watch Ronnie: putting down the glass like Joe: if you don't know me by now Ronnie: so misunderstood yeah Joe: 💔 Joe: you wish Ronnie: yeah you know me proper well Joe: bollocks Ronnie: keep the sweet talk coming baby Joe: that's not what you like Joe: silence is golden Ronnie: you reckon you know what i like now Joe: yeah Ronnie: took you long enough Joe: you been waiting all your life yeah Ronnie: shut the fuck up Ronnie: puked enough today cheers Joe: see? s'your favourite Joe: can't get enough Ronnie: hating you fuels me Ronnie: aint denying it Joe: you're so welcome Ronnie: got that from your avoidance tactics Joe: i'll turn around then Joe: give you a real reason to live Ronnie: try it Ronnie: ill fucking kill you Joe: have to come find me first Ronnie: yeah & Joe: you threatening me with a good time ain't how this day is supposed to go Joe: know that much Ronnie: itll go however the fuck i say Joe: yeah? Ronnie: you know that much about me mckenna Joe: ain't denying nothing me Ronnie: too busy doing it round your besties Joe: 'cos i don't owe them shit Joe: only you get to know me like that Ronnie: you said you were killing the sweet talk Joe: it ain't its just how it is Joe: you know me Joe: no one else, end of Ronnie: come be with me then Joe: i am Joe: one stop but that'll be worth it Joe: come to mine and stay yeah Joe: don't wanna see the others Ronnie: ill be there before you Ronnie: few streets away Joe: good Joe: i like it when you're there Ronnie: want me to kick the door in so your flatmate girlfriend has a heart attack Joe: go on Joe: if she lives i'll say you forgot your keys Ronnie: ill say its your 💘 day pressie Ronnie: all for you baby Joe: if you're also in a mac, believable Joe: her boyfriend dumped her so she'll definitely be in Ronnie: tonights the night for that 3some Ronnie: hot Joe: only if you kill her first 😏 Ronnie: we need her tears for lube Ronnie: think it through like Joe: we've always got blood, baby Ronnie: keep it up & ill deffo stay Joe: forever Ronnie: ive been waiting all fucking day for you Joe: i'm sorry Joe: i'm making it up to you, alright Ronnie: i mean hurry up Joe: 🚖 it and everything Ronnie: your gf will be thrilled Ronnie: can hear her crying from here like Joe: maybe its the cat Joe: very similar Ronnie: watch your fucking mouth bitch Joe: 😂 Ronnie: 😾 Joe: you're both very cute Ronnie: say that again & well both fuck you up Joe: adorable Ronnie: 🖕 Joe: 👼 you Ronnie: you wish soft cunt Joe: nah Joe: but i'll survive Ronnie: you fucking wont Ronnie: i know you like Ronnie: & what you like Joe: 'cos its you Joe: all you Ronnie: ruined your gfs rom com Ronnie: shes gonna need some of whatever the fuck youre bringing Joe: too bad Joe: its for you Joe: i might have some benzos she can have though Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: its wild being here when you aint & she is Joe: rude of her to have her drug-fuelled orgies when i ain't in Ronnie: party can really start now i am Ronnie: know shes dying to break the tension Ronnie: 👊💋 Joe: won't make you wait for me on that score, babe Ronnie: like you could Ronnie: bitch is ready to go Joe: you trying to make me jealous of sophie Ronnie: wouldnt use her Ronnie: fuck that Joe: awh Joe: 👼 Ronnie: you trying to say shes hot enough to bait you Ronnie: step your pussy up mckenna Joe: no Joe: i'm saying if you wanted to i would Joe: i'd obviously do anything for and with you Ronnie: we aint taking her virginity Ronnie: youre hard enough fucking work Joe: shut up 😏 Ronnie: make me baby Joe: that's part 2 of the plan Ronnie: you gonna talk me through it or you gonna do it Joe: i know what you like Joe: and how you feel about talking Joe: even if it ain't no empty words bullshit Ronnie: youve still got your tongue Ronnie: means i must wanna hear some shit youve got to say Joe: that means i can tell you all how you won't regret giving sid my tongue as a toy when it can be yours Ronnie: you wont regret leaving those cunts there & coming back to me Ronnie: [pics from his bed like hey it's me] Joe: i already knew that Joe: but keep reminding me whilst i wait for the man Ronnie: you gotta know it harder Joe: you'll know how hard i know it Joe: i'll make you feel it too Ronnie: you can keep you fingers unbroken too like Ronnie: typing that shit while we both wait Joe: don't reckon much to a dealer's idea of foreplay Joe: and i've waited too long for you already Ronnie: youve gotta bring it to em baby Ronnie: junkie law states it aint a real addiction til youve sucked a dick for it Ronnie: romance him Ronnie: [pics again like these will inspire you] Joe: fuck Joe: how 'bout I stay up here on my high horse and enjoy just being addicted to you then Ronnie: how bout you come the fuck home Ronnie: now Joe: yeah Joe: i gotta Joe: i need to see you right now Joe: i got what i really wanted we can top up later Ronnie: ill go out then Ronnie: they plug me faster than theyll do it for you Joe: can't blame 'em Ronnie: yeah you still smell like 🍒 Joe: and they know they ain't getting nothing sucked Ronnie: you could do a toe Ronnie: dont be a pussy Joe: 😂 Joe: i think they'd rather my money Joe: not cute like you Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: big cal is well into it Joe: tempting Ronnie: hell tell you how pretty you are Joe: just what i need Ronnie: yeah i know Joe: nah you know what i really am Joe: and that's what i want Ronnie: ive got eyes like Joe: me too Joe: even when they're half-shut or pinholed Ronnie: cute Joe: you Ronnie: dont Joe: why Ronnie: cause fucking dont Joe: alright Ronnie: fucks sake Joe: forget it Joe: i'm practically in the door Ronnie: make me

[shipwreckedwithcaptainmarrow]

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

Guess I’m doing it too, just gonna answer it all. #gettoknowtheblogger! lol 

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Absolutely, the best I ever could have hoped for, my mom was my closest friend before she passed, and my dad is the best dad I could ever ask for.  02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My girlfriend, Ava 03: Do you regret anything? Going halfway to mom and dad’s house, then realizing the hardware store was going to close soon, and doubling back for art supplies, only to have my mom pass away the next day. 2 years ago. I will never forgive myself.  04: Are you insecure? Who isn’t? 05: What is your relationship status? Good, as far as I know, she tried to break up with me once but I didn’t realize what was happening, and a year later we’re still a thing so, good. lol 06: How do you want to die? Peacefully in sleep? I mean, who wants to die other ways? 07: What did you last eat? BBQ chicken strips my gf made 08: Played any sports? I hear paintball is a sport. So, Paintball, like, 9 years ago, lol.  09: Do you bite your nails? Nope, never have.  10: When was your last physical fight? Never been in a physical fight. Very pirate-y, I know.  11: Do you like someone? My... girlfriend? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Yes! Me and friend stayed awake 3.5 days straight just to see who’d crash first, lol.  13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? My ex-bestfriend 14: Do you miss someone? My mom, every single day. And a couple friends from back in MI 15: Have any pets? I have a little siamese cat named Niffler that I adore, he makes chortling sounds all the time! 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Drunk! 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? Not there yet. lol 18: Are you scared of spiders? I’m not a fan of most insects, but my gf loves spiders, so, I’ve grown to tolerate them, lol. 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I would, and not have gone to the fucking hardware store and went to go see my mom like I was going to.  20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Last night, in bed. 21: What are your plans for this weekend? Fuck if I know, probably moving tons of shit from some stupid place to another. 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? No kids, I like animals tho and living my own life for me. Selfish,  I know. lol  23: Do you have piercings? How many? Both ears pierced, and lip piercing right where Andy Biersack has his. lol  24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? Umm.. Ancient greek, roman, viking, egyptian history and mythology, the golden age of piracy, medieval eras, etc. So I guess if you’re talking school, history? History and art? Probably art a tad more. 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? My friends from Michigan, my grandma up there, and of course, my mom.  26: What are you craving right now? I was craving more rum, but now kinda just craving my mom.  27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Nope, I’ve been dumped 8 times, but I’ve never broken it off with anyone. 28: Have you ever been cheated on? Yep! GF #3, strung me along and ended up getting with a navy guy. Then I became a pirate a few years later down the road. Unrelated.  29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? Not that I know of, I’ve been turned into a fucking wreck because of Gfs tho lol 30: What’s irritating you right now? My ex-friend, and lack of time to do drag stuff. 31: Does somebody love you? My dad, family, gf, and I’m sure a few friends.

32: What is your favourite color? Red! 33: Do you have trust issues? Kinda, been cheated on before the one time, but I think that was a fluke. Other than that one time, actually I guess not. ...no. lol. 34: Who/what was your last dream about? My house was on fire, but I heroically saved the day and helped put it out, as well as the neighbor’s fire! 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? Tonight, at my dad’s house, after grabbing stuff from my mom’s room. Not sure of the gf saw, but, I walked past her.  36: Do you give out second chances too easily? Absolutely yes!  37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Forgive, hands down. 38: Is this year the best year of your life? One month in, easily not.  39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 21 actually.  40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? I haven’t but I’ve told people it’s awesome then confessed to having never done it myself. So. No.  51: Favourite food? Chicken 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? I do not! Everything is meaningless!  53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Masturbated, lol.  54: Is cheating ever okay? Nope. 55: Are you mean? Nope, not in any way, I’m the most lenient nicest second-chance giving guy you’d ever meet who’d always give you the benefit of the doubt. lol 56: How many people have you fist fought? Zero, thought I’d like to fist fight my ex-friend right now. 57: Do you believe in true love? Nah, emotions are emotions. No such thing. 58: Favourite weather? 63 degrees, slight breeze. Can wear a tank top without being cold or having to put a jacket on, and overcast, so no direct sunlight.  59: Do you like the snow? The snow is who I am, but I live in South Carolina and have been denied my true climate for far too long. 60: Do you wanna get married? Indifferent, If we do we do,I personally don’t think you need to go through legal documentation and name changing to prove you love someone.  61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? Depends.  62: What makes you happy? Pop-punk music, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Pirates, Board Games, MTG, alcohol, friends that aren’t landlord assholes, my gf, my cat, porn, cross-dressing, etc. 63: Would you change your name? Not legally, but I like to use a different name while dressed as a Pirate and while cross-dressing.  64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Nope, lol. 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Would have to shoot her down, unless my gf is the said best friend of the opposite sex, in which case no? I don’t know many females as close friends. 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? I don’t have any friends that are girls that I hang out with. I had one, but she moved to Seattle.  67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My gf, 10 mins ago. 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Is hating your landlord deep? If not, then Tyler. lol. 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for? Nah, errything’s meaningless. lol 

[autodiscothings]

The hollow heart outline that I can’t replicate on my phone for Kolyat and Oriana.

Ship Asks: 

Anon, @ferociousqueak​ and @kxnways​: putting everything you’ve asked in one post to keep it tidy, since it’s all about Kol and Ori and their dynamic. 

(Some answers are NSFW, just a heads up.)

♡: who is the bigger romantic openly? Secretly?

Neither, to be honest- their romance seems very understated and even incompatible on the outside, but there is a strong devotion there.

I remember I filled in their ‘love language’ quiz awhile back, and it still applies. Oriana’s is Acts of Service, which sounds terribly demanding but boils down to: “actions speak louder than words.”

She might have told him she loved him first, but Ori already knew Kolyat’s feelings. He expressed them in his own quiet way: folding her clothes, making dinner, tucking her hair back, picking up the juice she likes without prompting, helping her with her Gala prep, etc. Small things done often without being asked.

Kolyat is Quality Time: his romance and love is a secret, precious thing he is reluctant to share with the rest of the universe. He wants dedicated time with Ori without distractions; just her and him (and the cat) safe in the quiet space of his apartment.

It’s why I paint them a lot in it, really. Writing them talking is annoying interesting as the truth only comes out when the pair of them are alone and away from the view of others, but there’s only so much pillowtalk I can write…

2. Who’s the one to send the other “I love my gf/bf” memes

Neither! Ori sends the 2190s equivalent of bored Snapchat selfies, which she has to send by email as Kolyat refuses to have the app installed on his omni-tool.

I painted this with that in mind:

Kolyat will sometimes open them at work, if he has time.

7. Is their friends/family supportive

Eventually for both. Miranda is perplexed why an asocial C-Sec detective whose dad (“a strange man”) she worked with does it for her sister, but once she understands they’re quietly devoted to each other, is happy for them. I still think she checked into Kol’s history though, read all his files and reports. She’s a good info-broker!

Kolyat hardly speaks to his aunts and uncles back on Kahje, but they knew he would end up with an alien. “At least it isn’t an asari” was the slightly racist answer when he eventually explains his choice of life partner.

Introducing Oriana to the C-Sec squad is something I’ve yet to write but happens in Sirens & Selkies, and goes about as well as expected when you’re introducing your girlfriend to Bats T’Lori…

8. How does one comfort the other when the other is in distress/having a panic attack/crying

WIP relevant, I’ve written a few scenes of this. Ori’s panic attacks are restrictive to her, and she doesn’t want to be touched:

She flinched just enough for me to get the hint and leave her alone. All I could see was her profile when I moved away, a strange blossom of red across the dip of her throat where her frill would start if she was drell.

I didn’t know if it was a souvenir from our previous good night, or the result of the rising sea of her anxiety.  “It’s noise from construction,” I said, unsure what to do. “Controlled explosions.”

She was staring at nothing again, but there was only so much I could do. Fish was still missing; I checked under the bed. the only spot I could think of. A pitiful yowl came from the darkness, to my relief.

Ori needs a private space to deal with it before she can face him, the bathroom is a favourite, In turn she is the: “I will help find an answer” practical sort of comfort when he is dealing with things, and will give a list of solutions.

 She’s a listener and very empathetic of course, but there’s a sense she has try to help fix something- this can chafe, as Kolyat can be stubborn.

9. Which one dissociates

Kolyat, for obvious memory recollection reasons, and he’ll get a gentle chin poke if she wants his attention. Ori knows when he’s lost in them now, but sometimes she gets it wrong. He could be thinking about the burrito vending machine and she’ll still ask if he’s okay; Kolyat can look pensive even when he’s content.

10. Which one stares at the other’s booty like “damn” and how does the other react when catching them

Kolyat, but I write through his eyes- but Ori can be forward too. Again, WIP relevant:

We were past the point of no return, but I still tried to sooth over the cracks. “A priest can look at the sea, you know. Sometimes I look twice to remember.”

The idiom confused her, a rarity. “You’re not as subtle as you think with that. I catch you staring at odd things, but I suppose you would.”

Ori tugged at her shirt  to reveal a shoulder, a bare collarbone on show. She did it to make a point, but like I fool I proved it for her. “Maybe I want you to notice that I am looking,” I said, reaching for her. “Have you thought of that?”

She draped her hands over my neck, a loose grip.  “But you still wait for me to make the first move,” she said, leaning closer to me. “You always do.”

I wondered if there was some truth to it, if I had fallen into an old tradition, at least for a drell. Her hands wandered down to the edge of my undersuit, fingers skirting the opening of my zipper; a woman is forward, a man waits. They were gender roles that had existed for centuries, and it annoyed me I played at them still.

14. Which one rolls over in the morning to wake up the other one just to give kiss them

Ori is the cheerful morning person! Kolyat can and will get up at ass o’clock for work, but on his days off you best believe he’s shoving the pillow over his face and cursing the Gods and what is wrong with you, it’s 6am-

21. What is their song? Like the song that gives them overwhelming feelings?

As their writer I have several, but they don’t have one- yet. Ori will remember, though. She’s a ‘soundtrack to your life’ kind of person; the sounds of Shin Akiba’s amusement arcade will remind her of their first date, the song they danced to at the C-Sec ball, etc.

28. Are either of them mentally ill, if so how do they help one another cope

Answered in 8, Ori’s anxiety is pretty bad. When I started writing them I didn’t realise just how rough she had it- Sanctuary was awful, and she was kidnapped and held there against her will for months.  

Kolyat of course has his own PTSD from the war and his childhood, but despite his own issues, is oddly better at handling them- at least now, young Kolyat not so much. 

The memories come, he lets them pass, then sends them on their way. The problem comes when he doesn’t do anything about them and broods (of course he broods.) Usually he’ll allow himself a Gods damn curse/woe is me, then move on to the task at hand. (Solving a case!)

Their coping mechanisms aren’t that healthy (“let’s throw ourselves at work!”) just yet, but they both agree the past does not define them- eyes forward, never back.

35. What be they kinks and do they try each other’s kinks

NSFW time! I think xenophilia is top of their kink list, but I’m so sorry, they’re very vanilla despite the alien difference.

 They fuck on the regular to the point I consider using the water spray to calm them down when I put them in a room together, but it all never go past the “silk tie” stage. 

Their actual kinks are:

He likes her in skirts and dresses that show of her collarbone/neck and legs, and likes it when she leaves her heels on; makes it easy for standing sex.

He likes to see her get off, and is very diligent about it before she even can return the favour. Kol will brood if she’s just along for the ride and can’t get off, a classy reaction.

She has a thing about sex outside their bedroom, and gets very handsy when drunk if she thinks no one is looking. Kolyat has to straddle the line of knowing what the Citadel public indecency laws are and thinking with his dick.

Speaking of, Kol loves head. When I write him he can be fucking blatant with this, it annoys me.

There’s a reason he’s a mess, it’s Ori’s ego. She got it into her head he was deprived of something, that drell (thanks to their throat muscles and vocal cords) were “better” than humans at the act, so she wanted to prove she was good at it too. I’ve yet to write it as that, mainly because they’re idiots who need the water spray.

Ori’s in charge of the bedroom. Their sexual dynamic usually has her define the: when, where and how. Not in the BDSM sense, but in the “I want to get off on top” sense. He in turn loves her enthusiasm and desire, all that attention on him.

They’re fucking awful at sexy space Skype, especially when Ori is working on a colony. Emails and calls without visuals are oddly better for her- she has gotten off with him recalling specific memories, for example. He appreciates the sexy selfies, and being told in very explicit terms that she wants him.

Ori goes through a stage of wanting to try things, some gets immediately vetoed by Kol. No to the handcuffs, he doesn’t want a work item associated with sex; okay fine we can try butt stuff for you, not me; I am not wearing that, Ori why-

42. How would one react if the other was to die

Tonal whiplash compared to the last question, holy shit. They grieve a long time, but I know Ori moves on eventually and remarries after his death. Kolyat takes longer to cope if she goes first, but is thankful for his children (and eventual grandchildren) to help shoulder the burden.

43. Who dies first

Kolyat, heart attack in his 90s. He dies in his garden surrounded by his cats, on the colony of their “summer” home.

44. Do they want kids

Eventually, but nowhere near the stage I’m currently writing them at. Their 20s is largely them working things out before they inflict their versions of parenting on to children.

45. How would they spend their last moments together

They would go out fighting, and try to be side by side if the Reapers returned. I am not sure what their last conversation would be, other than a frenzied comfort.

Phew, at the end! Questions taken from two places: 

Send A Ship And A Heart And I’ll Tell You…

not Basic Ship Ask Games

Thank you very much for your questions.